#Avidan!!! Avidan wake up!!!

[sailforvalinor]

See I’d been TSE posting but completely forgot to check for updates and!!! And!!! There was a time jump??? How long was it??? Avidan is older??? How long was Velvare in that cell??? How was Avidan locked up somewhere this long without anyone questioning where he’d gone? What was Ayran doing all this time that he’s just now busting Velvs out of jail? What has the ex-Novalog crew been doing in this indeterminate amount of time? Avidan wake up!!!

[cthulhuwritesstuff]

More angst, more words, more of my blood.

Zoro and Sanji in Wano, part 2 (2700 words, give or take)

The Labyrinth Song by Asaf Avidan is at fault. That and my depression. This is old, but rewriten slightly.

Ariadne

“The sword you gave me, it was heavy

I just had to lay it down

Let's funny how defenseless I can feel here

When there's nobody around”- Asaf Avidan

Wherever could one go when hanging off the cliff’s edge, right there at the brink of eternal madness, where no laws have been written, and no rationale applied?

This was it.

The thin line between forgettable and unforgivable rudely taunting him and Sanji, for the first time, considered crossing it. There was something exceptionally alluring about the borderline that night. If it was up to save the crew or his ability to feel, Sanji wouldn’t even think twice about the choice.

So…

Dry lips parted, skin splitting and leaving painful burning slits at the wake of the stretch, and heavy tongue smacked once against sharp teeth- a parched mouth ready to scream

No sound came.

Instead of crying for help, Sanji pushed onward and his body responded so effortlessly it terrified him. He was on a brink of losing everything he had built himself to be and becoming the same as everyone he couldn’t bear to be compared to…

If something were to go wrong…

If he couldn’t tell the difference between enemies or Nakama…

If he were to hurt those he loved most….

‘If I come back different…-’

Thick smoke wafted in circles, filling up the lungs and stinging the blue eyes, ready to devour what was left of the spent-out fire. Sanji had no more flames left inside of him, no more sparks to set his body ablaze.

‘-…put me down.’

No fear. No fear. No fear...

He knew far too well what the weight of his request would be.

The hammer struck the auction table upon his request, right after he heard that voice that shredded him of all senses from the moment he’d heard it first. Three cracks of thunder against a wooden surface, the loudest sound he has ever heard, and his life suddenly belonged to one person he trusted and hated most- equally.

‘Don’t die before then.’

Sold.

Just like that, Zoro was the one in the command of the guillotine on which Sanji willingly placed his neck against. Sanji felt sold, and owned again, although in a different way, but like a thing nonetheless.

‘You can’t change me, Zoro…’

‘But I can save you.’

Idiot…

‘I don’t want you to.’

‘You don’t get to make that choice, Cook.’

He was digging his own grave, and damned be all gods above and demons below, didn’t he know it. He dug so deep until he knew the crater was big enough to contain all his pain and overgrown demons, and Sanji finally- finally screamed.

That was it. The beginning of an end. He was tired and numb, branded raw by life that felt as if it wasn’t even his to command, so Sanji dusted himself off, letting his flames burn the engravings of his soul into the earth below where he knew they’d stay.

Nobody else needed to know. If anyone in this world would have Sanji’s life in their hand… Well…

Might as well be him.

--

Days passed and they haven’t spoken about it, not once. It all went back to normal, but what was the accurate meaning of the concept truly?

Sanji felt… everything. He felt that was enough. It was supposed to be enough. However, the piper came to claim what belonged to them, and Sanji was soon introduced to feelings he never thought he’d face.

Zoro was different. Distant, like islands Nami hadn’t yet charted. Cold, like the peaks of Drum Rocks.

Zoro changed and Sanji felt it.

His’s glare followed Sanji like a poltergeist haunting the glasshouse of unstable composure, the walls of which attempted to conceal Sanji’s fault lines trembling from feeling exposed and raw. It felt too intimate and it was infuriating, but Sanji had made his bed and he was about to lay in it, whether there were roses or thorns decorating the pillows. It didn’t matter.

He knew what he deserved.

It was still maddening; Life without a lifeline, but with a steady hand on the hammering pulse of his still-beating heart. A hand of an executioner of his own choosing- at least Sanji had gotten that much. He counted his blessings and reminded himself of the meaning of silver linings.

‘Put me down…’ Like an animal, because he never believed he deserved any more recognition for his pathetic existence anyway.

Perhaps a different choice of words….

Choice of words- please, why would he mind? Zoro wasn’t supposed to mind, and that was where Sanji’s first mistake lay.

It was alright- Sanji told himself over and over again, hoping he’d somehow believe it. It was just overwhelming, it was hard, they were exhausted- yes, that was it. Zoro would soon go back to irritating him and Sanji would stop worrying. It was simple. It was supposed to be simple…

Sanji waited, patiently, for his change of heart to occur, but no such pardon came. Gods were cruel. It was akin to torture but not quite as devastating- walking low on a tightrope, grasping onto a stolen chance to live and feel again, the time of his expiration now known only to him.

‘I am no human…”

Weapon… his mind echoed, and he gritted his teeth, concentrating purposefully on the smoke escaping the snapping and burning end of a cigarette poised between his lips. The festivities of Wano blurred into a kaleidoscope of images and sounds- bursts of color and tingling sensation, and Sanji let himself get high on the moment

What did he expect anyway?

--

The time passing in strange silence was maddening and Sanji could barely bring himself to pretend their conversation never happened. So he allowed the sparks to course up the strings of his tense nerves, setting his whole existence ablaze and he held his breath enough long enough to call it courage. When he finally uttered the question that’s been clawing its way out of his mouth, Sanji was already mindless and his voice was broken.

“Do you hate me?”

It was appropriate- the two of them were finally alone, and he finally got a chance to speak the way he had meant to for a long time.

If only it was ever that simple with Zoro…

Stoic and calm, just like the sea before a storm, Zoro’s mere presence burned into him with the intensity that would put fools and kings alike to shame, and the swordsman said nothing.

Sanji’s bones were almost crushed under the weight of Zoro’s reticence, but who was he if not resilient to the demons and their wicked ways?

Still, right there, in the presence of his rival with his whole heart resting on the outstretched open palm at mercy of a single answer, Sanji felt more fear than he would have facing Death.

Death would have been easy… Sanji’s mind whispered.

A short ‘yes’ or ‘no’ would have sufficed, but the swordsman, no matter how simple and cheap with his words, was never the one to offer such an easy form of satisfaction.

Zoro didn’t look at him. He remained seated with his limbs crossed, looking comfortable and occupying the space like a monolith of composure. Always solid, always fearless- Zoro was shatter-proof and that didn’t sit well with Sanji’s ego currently chipping away and disappearing into the ether. Sanji stood over him, looking down at him, waiting and daring not to breathe, knowing that falling to his knees would have probably been easier. Still, he remained where he was, holding onto the pitiful amount of strength he had left, growing roots into the spot where he stood. He could not move. He didn’t trust himself.

Zoro was a man of pride however, and prideful men didn’t like looking up.

A stalemate. The usual game between the two. A boring outcome, usually, but now- nothing but torment. Sanji felt weak. Zoro seemed indestructible.

Alright then…

It was methodical, really, the way Zoro’s silence spoke volumes and proceeded to educate Sanji on what endurance truly meant. Each passing second seemed to have stretched longer like a punishment, rearranging the order of Sanji’s priorities. As he stood in front of the man he had no courage to admit he loved, Sanji learned how much he could actually take.

What he survived amounted to nothing compared to how Zoro made him feel by not indulging his desperation. For the first time ever, Sanji had nothing to hold on to, no opponent to unleash his rage upon, and nobody to pin the blame on for what he was feeling.

It was terrifying. It was unlike Zoro he had known, the man who’d always answer to each of his requests to spar and let out the steam threatening to suffocate.

Loaded moments passed in gut-wrenching anticipation, silence screamed and Sanji’s bones reduced themselves to fine powder, lines of shredded pride which were up for the taking for Zoro to get high on. Yet, Sanji’s ashes remained untouched. When Zoro still did nothing about the said offer, unwavering and cold as Siberian winter, Sanji’s existence folded and his restraint tilted on its axis.

His body moved before his mind had a chance to command it to stop and Sanji found his hands tangled into Zoro’s robes, knotting them, tugging on them with a promise of ripping the fine fabric- desperate and sloppy, wanting a reaction of any kind. Sanji hissed when Zoro remained unbothered, and the flames in his body tickled up his spine steadily. He was itching for a fight. Surrendered to the movements filled with shame he refused to confront at that moment Sanji heard a plea escape his mouth- a tired sound of giving up,

“Say something…”

When Zoro finally moved, Sanji entirely lost his breath. Large hands unfolded and swiftly, without an ounce of real effort, Sanji found himself straddling Zoro’s open lap, disheveled and panting. Zoro’s grip on him was everything but gentle and his large palms buried deep into the fabric covering Sanji’s trembling body and aching skin threatening to burst at the seams. As if he wanted to remind Sanji of pain, of what it felt like to truly be alive.

In this state, he was an easy target, and Sanji had no strength to pull away, only to shove his fists lamely into Zoro’s solid shoulders, hating what being held in such a merciless manner did to him. He was painfully aware of how other’s large rigid frame caged around him, pinning him in the spot in which he fitted so snuggly it was almost too much to bear, and Sanji allowed his heart to take over the exhausted mind.

“Zoro, please, say something…” he breathed out shakily, letting his words brush against Zoro’s lips and cheeks, watching that stoic expression through hooded eyelids and rapidly growing haze.

As an act of mercy that Sanji drank in like a parched man, Zoro’s eye zeroed in on him and forced the remaining pieces of Sanji’s composure to desolate into nothing.

“You…” Zoro’s voice vibrated like a cord stroked by clumsy fingers, growl-like and intense. It was nothing but a whisper really, but how it echoed in Sanji’s heart causing it to forget how to properly pump blood, and suddenly, it was cold.

With a loud swallow, Zoro all but ate the words burning on the tip of his tongue and he shut his mouth into a tight white line, unwilling to let his composure slip.

Sanji was a mess.

Grabbing onto the man like a child after a bad dream, Sanji let his tremors melt into Zoro’s death grip, allowing all of him to be visible, felt- he felt bare.

‘Forgive me…’ but the plea never reached his lips. Instead, it was a sob ripped straight out of quintessence, bursting out like a cry for help and Sanji, for what he thought would be the last time, allowed himself to be brave. Those aching lips clashed with Zoro’s, letting small cries of pure torture come out in waves when all he was greeted was ice.

Slowly, as if he was learning how to breathe, Sanji managed to regain some of his control and his mouth slowed, small kisses placed in the corner of those unresponsive lips, over their plump flesh that felt stiffer than he could ever remember them being, and up to where they arched- kiss after kiss, featherlike, tender.

Nothing.

Not a sigh, not an inch- Sanji was begging and Zoro didn’t cave. Eyes darted up to face the deep mercury and Sanji took in the expression he’s never seen before.

Destroyed, he hissed sucking a sharp breath and his fists uncurled from Zoro’s shoulders.

“I see…” Sanji whispered, finally understanding. There was nothing he could have done that would bridge the gap he created. Closing his yes and placing his fingers onto the arms still wrapped around him, he pushed gently, ready to move, ready to leave.

So this is how it ends…

Suddenly suffocating, Sanji pushed harder against Zoro’s forearms- he needed to breathe. But Zoro didn’t falter. Still holding tight, as if he had a mission to punish Sanji further with nothing but his stone-cold presence, Zoro didn’t even blink when those big broken blues locked onto him in disbelief, pain, and confusion.

“Let go…” the blond demanded weakly, and Zoro tightened his grip, fingers burning into the hip bones and around the strong waist, knowing far too well the bruises would bloom by morning.

“Let--…” Sanji protested, a bit more loudly this time, his push more prominent and expression growing more aggravated, “Zoro, let go,” broken, “Zoro!” angry, “Zoro, let me go!” determined.

“I would have done it,” – desperate.

Sanji froze at the sound of Zoro’s voice. His grip loosened and his breath vacated his body, leaving him limp and weak. Zoro sounded… hurt.

“What are you--…”

“I would have killed you!” Zoro snarled, hooking his fingers deep into Sanji’s flesh and pressing his forehead against the blond’s. His breath was labored and eye beamed with anger.

“I know…” Sanji managed softly, “I asked…”

“You asked me to live with your blood on my hands!”

“I asked you to save everyone if needed!” Sanji yelled back, his strength regained, his anger bubbling up his chest, “I asked you to do something nobody else could have…”

Zoro shook his head as if he was trying to comprehend Sanji’s words and his mouth tightened into a pale line. Breathing as if he was just learning to, listening as if he had just gained the power of hearing- Sanji waited for an answer that would be the last nail into his coffin.

Silence. Not the usual kind that lulls a couple into a dreamless slumber, laced with comfort and mutual trust. This silence was hollow, deep, somehow heavier than air and it honed onto Sanji’s shoulders, pressing him further into Zoro’s lap.

“Do you?” Sanji managed, barely, impressed with his own ability to fall through with uttering the question again.

“Do you hate me, Zoro?”

It was the cliff’s edge, and through the sailing clouds, he could see a vista of new horizons- all he had to do was let go and take a leap of faith. Oh, but if something was terrifying, Sanji was it.

Right there, in Sanji’s broken gaze, Zoro found his way back to himself out of the maze of utter despair he’d submitted himself to in the past days.

He was never the one to back out on a promise. He wasn’t the one to fail either.

‘Put me down…’

Zoro wasn’t the man of prayer either, but he would have been a liar if he had said he didn’t turn his face to the heavens and plead for them to pardon him from this one commitment.

‘Please… Don’t make me… Do not make me kill him…”

Fear… Despair… God, stupidity even. All of those things. But hate?

Hate…

Zoro’s chest expanded as he inhaled deeply, desperately, the tremoring sound of his breath shaking being the only tell of his chipping composure.

Hate- if it was only that simple. Hate had nothing to do with it. Hate was what people believed they felt when they were utterly helpless, exposed, terrified, hurt. Zoro was all of those things, but what he felt was no form of hatred. It was worse than that.

It was a feeling that leaves men like Zoro broken in years of adulthood if not attended to properly. It was a feeling that drove the best of them to madness. It was a feeling that the swordsman never dared to hope he deserved to experience.

As he held onto Sanji’s lean frame as if he needed the reassurance that the man was truly there, right there, in his arms, breathing, with those stormy blues fixated on him, Zoro shivered, parted his lips, and...

“I--…”

………………………………….

[one-true-houselight]

[id: a comic of Dan Avidan from Game Grumps. He starts asleep in a blue toned room. He wakes up in a white void, only to see a fish on a plaque. The fish starts to sing, and the song is illustrated:

Come gather round and listen well

I have a tale I wish to tell

It might fill your heart with dread

All the fish one day decided

They were not content to be derided

As simple animals to be strung up with a thread

So up they came and in no time

Began their villainous life of crime

Robbing people silly where e’er they went

Diamonds, jewels, coats of vole

It mattered not to them what they stole

So long as society was into a panic sent

Nothing could be done to stop them

If confronted, the best thing to do was drop them

And run away as the fish kept adding to their stash

But consider this, my fluffy haired friend

How much worse it could have been

So now we say,

At this, Dan wakes back up in the blue room and mutters, "Thank God fish aren't into cash." There are pink question marks and 'what?' reacting to him. /end id]

One of the silliest things I could have done. But hey, I actually posted art!

[ratasum]

So I'd mentioned earlier today wanting to post more music that relates to my characters, and first off I'm sharing this: Night Runner's "Magnum Bullets (feat. Dan Avidan)." Specifically in relation to Vezz and the massacre at Theta-9.

I specifically relate this to his fleeing the Inquest because of the vibe of the song, so Imma break down some of the lyrics to how I relate them in.

(It's honestly MADNESS how well this song fits him. This has been Vezz's story for almost ten years. But I digress.)

No longer I pretend The staircase I descend Will lead me anywhere but my unscripted end My heart and hands collide The gun lays at my side Too late to turn back, only fate's left to decide

For those unfamiliar with his past, Vezz decided to leave the Inquest when he found out his old college research was being used by his then lover and overseer - Zaige - to place children into golems, killing them in the process. It shattered him... especially when he learned that not only had this been going on for years now and he hadn't noticed, Zaige had also kidnapped his old krewemate Pheazza's daughter Yixxi as a final proof of concept experiment.

He meant to have Vezz throw the lever to prove his loyalty to the Inquest once and for all.

And he couldn't do it. His choice was made the minute he saw Yixxi's face looking back at him through Zaige's illusions. He couldn't let one more child die, whether it had been his former krewemate's daughter or not.

Back up the stairs again I am a different man A broken mirror only shows as best it can Running in shoes that shine With blood that isn't mine A stinging trophy of the battles I've survived

That choice, in the end, sealed the fate of everyone in that facility that night. Everyone who tried to stop him or got in his way wound up killed, bodies left scattered in his wake, fires raging from interrupted and destroyed experiments. All in a furious, guild-blinded hunt for Zaige. He was injured, though not terribly so. Bloodied, mostly from those he'd killed in his mad rampage.

Alive, only to take his vengeance and save Yixxi to get her back to her mother.

No longer I defend The choices I pretend Could make amends that heal the loss of precious time My conscience paralyzed Against the rising tide Of haunting memories that drown a wasted life

He knows he can't change what he's done. What he's allowed to happen here. But he can kill Zaige. And he does, straddling his former lover's chest, listening to his strangled cackling as his claws dig into his throat, blood red eyes wide and fangs bared as his necromancy rips the lifeforce from the man prone beneath him, feeding it into his necromantic prosthesis... and into the sword gripped tightly in Zaige's shriveling hand.

In the end, Zaige is left a husk. Vezz grabs Yixxi, and - in a fit of what can perhaps only be considered sentimentality - Zaige's greatsword. And he leaves, knowing there's no place for him left in the world.

Magnum bullets Always wanting more Magnum bullets Closing every door

For now.

[britts-galaxy-brain]

Sorry for one, being on anon, and two, if this is too personal to ask.

Do you personally think Lily will ever get consequences for her actions? That maybe one day, everyone - including her own audience - find out and recognise her for the person she is? That maybe one day, she won’t be able to twist the stories of her victims, won’t be able to get away with sexual assault, and her reputation will rightfully go up in flames?

I don’t think most of Lily’s audience are malicious. There are right-wings and nazis of course (like Cassandra Nya) for obvious reasons, but at what point do you think decent people in her audience will say: “I’m not taking any of your bullshit anymore.”?

Is that even… possible? I’m starting to lose hope.

From what I've seen, she's maintained a revolving door of young people that aren't experienced enough to pick up on the fact that her behavior is abusive and manipulative. Every time a layer of her audience leaves, they're replaced with a new group of younger people.

Since law enforcement generally doesn't give a shit about online csem even when it's explicitly illegal in her jurisdiction, I fear the only way Lily will ever face real consequences is if she gets cocky enough to try to date one of her underage fans before they turn 18.

She lies so convincingly that it's impossible to use evidence to convince her current inner circle that they've been had by a monster. It hasn't been enough that Lily dates people that have been fans of her since they were minors. It isn't enough that Lily exclusively dates fans in general, which is a major no no and tbh I'm shocked that alone wasn't enough to get her reputation wiped.

There are people that are still mad at Dan Avidan for one-night standing an adult fan a decade ago, yet Lily Orchard gets a free pass to date, use, and abuse her fans in whatever way she sees fit because she likes a cute hamster show and gives them crumbs of being nice to them sometimes.

Lily knows what the cycle of abuse is. Lily knows what kinds of people are most susceptible to it. And she employs it very intentionally. There's a reason she brings in specific people to her inner circle. She likes them complacent. She likes them with low self-esteem. She likes them unsure of themselves. She likes them desperate for her attention. Those are the types she can manipulate into defending her, giving her sexual and ego gratification, and working for her channel for free.

No amount of slandered, damaged people in her wake is going to be enough to convince her inner circle that she's the problem. Because somehow she convinces them that evidence isn't real, her lies are the only "evidence" that matters. As long as she can make herself into a tragic victim, the people closest to her aren't going to want to question her and risk being wrong. It's easier for them to believe the rest of us, the ACTUAL victims, are evil liars than to admit their idol is a vicious manipulator that doesn't care about them beyond what they can give her.

[theworldwalkerswols]

The Warrior of Light and his Loves

A Kyler & Polycule Playlist

Magnum Bullets by Night Runner, feat. Dan Avidan | Kyler of the Silver Fuller Themesong / Bad Ending

A dark and moonless night has never felt so right an empty mirror only shows what's left inside lost in the city street, electric tapestry the neon beacons me beyond its ghostly light

No longer I pretend the staircase I descend will lead me anywhere but my unscripted end my heart and hands collide, the gun lays at my side too late to turn back, only fate's left to decide

Magnum bullets - settling a score magnum bullets - kicking down the door

Back up the stairs again, I am a different man a broken mirror only shows as best it can running in shoes that shine with blood that isn't mine a stinging trophy of the battles I've survived

No longer I defend the choices I pretend could make amends, that heal the loss of precious time my conscience paralyzed against the rising tide of haunting memories that drown a wasted life

Magnum bullets - always wanting more magnum bullets - closing every door

Heavensward Canon Storyline Spoilers Ahead

I listened to this song on repeat to write Kyler of the Silver Fuller, my "have my angst cake and eat my happy ending cake too" fic. That it's a song of revenge is so fitting, and the sequence toward the end of the video where the protagonist dances in pure anguish on the bullet he fires that will avenge his lover's life lives in my head absolutely rent free.

There's a bunch of details that line up SO nicely: the feeling of emptiness in the wake of staggering loss; the neon of Azys Lla; the blood that doesn't belong to the protagonist/WoL on their clothes; the acknowledgement that revenge will not make amends, will not 'heal the loss of precious time', that no matter what, they will always want more.

My absolute favorite lines in this song are "my conscience paralyzed against the rising tide / of haunting memories that drown a wasted life." Haurchefant would never say he wasted his life, and the WoL would never say it aloud...but I think it very likely that they might feel it, in their innermost heart. Kyler certainly did, and these lines are what I tried to have him increasingly embody as he hurtles toward revenge, and especially in his encounter with the Heavens' Ward in Silver Fuller.

[askpinkietai]

Been playing with Replicate’s text-to-Pokémon AI art generator today, and been inventing some new Pokémon for fun. I thought it’d be fun to then take my favourite designs and write up some Fakémon descriptions for them. Usually I just went with the first result, or else you just spend too long trying to perfect an idea and lose what was already good. The AI seems to really like disk-shaped things for unknowable entities (half the Lovecraftian creatures I tried came back as symbolic disks), and it also draws on Vivillon quite heavily, to the point where “exotic butters” just returned actual Vivillon images with little change.

Gonna put a linebreak here since this could be a long post~

Prompt: “wetlands ghost” Name: Fentasm Type: Ghost/Water Description: A friend to those lost in the foggy marshlands, this mysterious Pokémon appears when the moon breaks through the fog to guide travelers along a safe path.

Prompt: “SipsCo Dirt Factory” Name: Dirtpyle Type: Ground Description: A Pokémon used as a diligent factory worker. Its ability to compress, compact, and store dirt into neat cubes makes it valuable in agricultural work.

Prompt: “cheeseburger” Name: Bugcheeser Type: Bug/Normal Description: This strange Pokémon has a strong smell of a fast food restaurant! Strangely meaty and soft for a Bug-type, it conceals a large mouth underneath its brown shell. This Pokémon is a common sight in urban areas.

Prompt: “the spirit of halloween” Name: Hallowraith Type: Ghost/Dark Description: A shadowy Pokémon that appears in late autumn, just after the harvest season. Originally feared for its appearance, people later celebrated it as a sign of the colder weather coming and held celebrations in its name. It may accept offerings of candy.

Prompt: “Cthulhu” Name: Lurkrafter Type: Poison/Water Description: A slumbering titan deep under the ocean, many legends tell of the fearful day it may wake. Despite its sturdy looks, it is actually quite soft and has been bruised by boats passing over its napping area.

Prompt: “mars rover” Name: Rover Rotom Type: Electric/Steel Description: This Rotom form is used to explore hostile environments. Its large tires allow it to climb rough surfaces with ease, and it collects solar energy with its panels to keep itself powered up. It communicates remotely with its owner.

Prompt: “Ghostbusters” Name: Bustrinos Type: Normal Description: Often seen in groups, even a single Bustrinos is a match for any Ghost-type. Each variety brings a unique skill to their fight against ghostly opponents, including a tracking ability, an electrical discharge, and a mood-altering slime.

Prompt: “hastur” Name: Yelloking Type: Dark Description: This mysterious disk-like Pokémon is spoken about only in hushed whispers, as it’s said invoking its name can bring its attention. It is instead usually referred to with a drawing of the yellow sign in the middle of its body.

Prompt: “rock-type pretending to be a tree” Name: Conifraud Type: Rock/Grass Description: A distant relation of Sudowoodo that has taken its disguise far enough to actually become part Grass-type. This Pokémon is almost impossible to spot at a distance. Cut does not work on it.

Prompt: “arin hanson” Name: Grumpanzee Type: Ground/Fighting Description: A sturdy Pokémon with a lot of power, it is unfortunately impatient and easily distracted. Its luxurious mane protects it from being struck from behind while it is bragging about its strength.

Prompt: “dan avidan” Name: Luchadan Type: Normal/Fighting Description: Charming and easygoing, this Pokémon is a talented musician with the aid of its third arm. It is often seen in the company of Grumpanzee, where it keeps its grumpy companion on track.

[tallsuperstar]

Was NOT expecting to wake up this morning and hear that Dan Avidan is playing Ruff Ruff Red

[enigma-absolute]

13 and 3 for the ask game, perhaps??

3. What tropes do you like writing about the most? (´▽`ʃƪ)

That's honestly a good question, now that I look over my works, both original and fic. I think the thing that crops up the most in both sections is legacy - legacy characters, roles and how we all deal with it and inherit it. I think it really comes from my own experience of being the first freeborn daughter of two different families who escaped Communist Romania prior to the revolution, and the struggles they had to get their freedom. It gives me a lot to think on family legacy in my case, both ancestral and more personal, as I have found myself associating with my mom's inheritance more than I could my dad's.

In the Eagle's Cross Eddsworld universe, Cora and her siblings in the titular series have different ways of reacting to and embracing their ancestors' adventurous, if admittedly outlandish, histories and personalities. In 'The Christmas Calamity,' Jaxx (one of the main characters) is first trying to outright refuse it, but eventually comes to fall in love with it on his own terms and terms he has to redefine. Cora herself in 'The Eagle's Cross' has still to unravel some (honestly very opaque) mysterious past with her ancestors and dragging in her little sister and her own best friend into it.

In my own original detective show, the main detective and her 'Watson' partner are chasing after her hero's own mysteries to solve and eventually have to come up and fight against his enemies; leading the way to find out that her hero's adventures, mysteries and stories entwine closely to her own history and potentially taking up the mantle he sacrificed to save her life.

With Maddox Darling and his adventures in the Galaxy Far Far Away, it's more subtle. The Peter Pan references and links are on purpose, but they're not direct or in-your-face (his surname, the pin he constantly wears from his sister, etc). That being said, while he does have Peter Pan tendencies, his role is more of a Wendy Darling situation, honestly. He'll grow up eventually, but it doesn't mean he'll forget his loves nor stop adventuring. His legacy is more about what he leaves behind on the galaxy's inhabitants circa the Imperial and Rebellion era, but also the kind of legacy they leave on him and how he'll eventually take it home. That's why I love doing RP with him, because he's literally quite a character to Throw Into Situations and I'm figuring out his canon as I go along.

13. Drop a playlist for a story! ♪♡♪

Speaking of Maddox, here's his (slightly old) origin story playlist! I'd crafted it when I was very early on in writing him and did it as part of a character challenge to develop him a little more, so I'll be explaining songs in chapters under the cut.

Life in Aus before the GFFA: Down Under by Men at Work and Slice of Heaven by Dave Dobbins

Going to the GFFA: Starlight Brigade by TWRP feat. Dan Avidan

Settling into the Rebellion and Rebel Life: Hooked on a Feeling by Blue Swede

Infiltrating the Ship and Imperial Capture: Last Surprise (Cover by Arc Tournament, feat Casey Lee Williams), Eide+Eide Fight (NITW OST)

The Amnesia Process: The Mind Electric by Miracle Musical, Unknowable (NITW OST)

Waking up, Wrecking up and Escaping the Empire's ship, Roaming After the Escape Pod Crash: Black (Homestuck cover by RichaadB), Run! (NITW OST), Radioactive by Imagine Dragons

Reaching through the Force and Recovering Memories: Thirteen (Doctor Who OST, Series 11)

Back to the Rebel Base and Into Regret (I Should Never Have Left Home): Shut Eye by Stealing Sheep, Timshel by Mumford and Sons, I Was Wrong by The Oh Hellos

Amnesia Aches, Grief with Benny and Learning to Grow: Ghost by Ellie Drennan, The Doctor’s Theme (Doctor Who OST, Series 1-2), I Have Made Mistakes by The Oh Hellos

Call to Hope and Adventure Once Again, To Be Continued (I Will Remember and Grow as I Go): And Straight On Till Morning by Marianas Trench, Binary Sunset (A New Hope OST, particularly the horns at the dual suns), Call Me (Cover by Sebastian Böhm)

[morgan-is-here]

Yes I know that it is past 10pm so these emotions don't count, but have you considered that they make a very good point and I actually hate everything.

You can peer review my brain if you want, but I think you'll find I'm correct.

[a-concert-just-for-me]

fun fact.

"hat ralsei" originally came from me tryna tag ch1 ralsei art as ^that ralsei and accidentally misspelled but I kept it, bc yeah. That is hat ralsei. Ralsei with a hat :)

JDVWBSWHDJKA OKAY FINE but I still love it with my entire heart!!

[galmiahthepigeon]

I don’t think any bit will ever be as funny as Dan calling Arin a whore for literally no reason during these last few Mario Party espisodes

[catchingfroggy-blog]

Sketches of long hair grump dudes as a result of cERTAIN CONVERSATIONS.

But mostly Brian.

It’s mostly Brian’s fault go blame him

[with-love-from-hell]

Music Accompaniment for Vermillion Skies (parts 1 & 2)

First off, thank you all for the interactions and love thus far for the Vermillion Skies fic! It was very relieving to write the first two parts as a survivor- and again, something that I do quite enjoy is when Abusers get served their comeuppance after the trauma they inflict on someone else- but unfortunately it doesn’t happen all that often. 

In regards to my writings, my motivations can sometimes vary. However, I took a really interesting quiz once that was titled “What emotion do you write from?” or something of the like. For the life of me, I cannot find the post where I took the quiz (if anyone has it, let me know!). But I ended up getting the result of “Pain,” which was surprising to me at first- but then I looked through my original draft of Vermillion Skies and thought...yeeaaah accurate lol 

However, I do think that while I tend to utilize pain a lot in my writing, something that glares behind it is the idea of hope and comfort. I like instilling that in my audience, because I think it is necessary for us to endure the pain of just....living in general. 

I have gotten a lot of asks on where the inspirations come from- and in a broader sense, my own experience, desire to see abusers suffer, and need for a good depiction of a masculine person's response is pretty much it. But I also use Music as a way to inspire my writings. When I think of a scenario/subject, I will often play music that may match the vibe of the situation, and run with it. So for those who want to know in a more detailed way where my inspiration comes from- or for those who have similar inclinations and would like an official soundtrack to Vermillion Skies, here is what I listened to while writing it! I broke it down between parts and scenes (scenes are within the breaks in the writing, parts are the separate posts). If there was a particular part of a scene the music relates to more, I will specify that! Hope this gives clarity to those asks- I figured I’d make one large master post of it rather than answering individually!

Part One

Scene 1

Sunflower - Swae Lee ft. Post Malone (Introduction)

Bury a Friend - Billie Eilish (Something Isn't Right)

Save Me - Globus (Assault - Her Perspective)

The Handler - Muse (Assault - Her Perspective)

Emperors New Clothes - Panic! At the Disco (Assault - His Perspective)

Magnum Bullets - Night Runner ft. Dan Avidan (Discovered Body)

Scene 2

Running Up That Hill - Placebo (Initial Fear/Running Home)

Warning Signs - The Anix (We Need To Find Her) 

Magnum Bullets - Night Runner ft. Dan Avidan (Discovered Body)

Hit and Run - Abused Romance (Waiting for Simeon)

Waking the Demon - Bullet For My Valentine (Realization/Other Matters)

Scene 3

And the Snakes Start to Sing - Bring Me the Horizon (Stalking)

The Wolf - SIAMÉS (Stalking)

Wolf Totem - The Hu ft. Jacoby Shaddix (The Scent is Stronger)

You’re Going Down - Sick Puppies (Finding the Attacker)

Take Back The Fear - Hail the Villain (Taking His Tongue)

Baptize - Atreyu (The Whole Beating)

Out for Blood - Sum 41 (The Whole Beating)

Rise - A Skylit Drive (The Whole Beating)

Blood on My Hands - The Used (The Whole Beating)

Face Down - The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus (Begging for Mercy/Mutilation)

Grave Mistake - Ice Nine Kills (Begging for Mercy/Mutilation)

Throne - Bring Me the Horizon (Taking to the Sky)

I Hope You Suffer - AFI (The Fall)

Part Two

Scene 1

Warrior - Atreyu (Back Home)

Failure - Breaking Benjamin (Back Home)

Wreckage - Ben Jelen (Entering His Room)

Valentines Day - Linkin Park (She’s Resting)

Hurt (Cover) - Johnny Cash (She's Resting/Trying to Touch Her)

All Fall Down - OneRepublic (Rest)

Scene 2

Nothing’s Gonna Hurt You Baby - Cigarettes After Sex (The Dream)

Everything Stays (Cover) - Amanda Pedersen (The Dream)

Shadow of the Day - Linkin Park (You’ll Never Laugh Again)

Scars - I Prevail (Lucifer's Woe)

Pale & Naked Name - The Pusher (Lucifer’s Woe)

Just Stay - A Skylit Drive (I Don’t Blame You)

Sleepwalker - The Anix (The Dream is Now a Nightmare)

My Demons - Starset (The Dream is Now a Nightmare)

Last to Fall - Starset (Come Back to Him)

Without You - Breaking Benjamin (Come Back to Him)

Scene 3

Talk - Coldplay (Conversing with Mammon)

Comes and Goes in Waves - Greg Laswell (Mammon’s Break Down)

Foreigner’s God - Hozier (Mammon’s Break Down)

Brother - NeedtoBreathe ft. Gavin DeGraw (Comforting Mammon)

Coming Home - BUNT. ft. Sons of the East (Will Things Be Different?)

Through Glass - Stone Sour (Everyone is Resting)

Kristy, Are you Doing Okay? - The Offspring (Watching Over You)

Scene 4

Nothing to Lose But You - Three Days Grace (Whole Scene)

Unwell - Matchbox 20 (Barbatos is Suspicious)

How it Feels to Be Lost - Sleeping with Sirens (Diavolo's Joke/How Does He Explain?)

Falling Apart in a Crowded Room - A Skylit Drive (Trying to Keep Composure)

Pity Party (Cover) - Vigils (Lucifer’s Break Down) {{I absolutely abhor Melanie Martinez, but this cover is good and a better take of the original}}

Without You - Breaking Benjamin (Lucifer's Break Down)

Grave Mistake - Ice Nine Kills (Lucifer’s Break Down)

Heavy - Linkin Park ft. Kiiara (Comforting Lucifer)

Read Vermillion Skies here

[jerryterry]

I don't know if this is a stupid question or not, but have you heard about the Dan Avidan scandal yet?

I can always tell when something's gone down with those guys cos I wake up with my YouTube notifications looking like this

(Sure, the guy who became a pariah for being an outspoken racist 'won' because his replacement also did something bad. That's how it works I guess.)

But honestly, other than being vaguely aware of something involving Danny getting some sort of allegations against him, I haven't really cared enough to look into it. I haven't liked/cared about Game Grumps for years now, and I've honestly been contemplating deleting or at least unlisting my shitty old remixes for a while now.

[boredliondisorder]

I was diagnosed with C-PTSD in 2018.

I don’t usually have “active” symptoms anymore, but it doesn’t just go away. The memories are there, and I still went through those feelings. I can tell I’m still having problems with it because I have strange reactions to things.

Making friends is hard, because when I feel a connection with someone, I start having panic attacks. I won’t go into why that is, but it’s led to a reliance on parasocial relationships, where I don’t have to worry about whether or not the other person will respond or even likes me. I know it’s one-sided, and that’s what’s comfortable for me now. I use cameo to pay for people to be nice to me for a couple minutes. 

I know this is wrong, and I know I should be searching for longer-lasting friendships. I’m trying with a couple people, but it’s excruciatingly slow because I have to mitigate a panic reaction almost every time I have a conversation. It sucks. In the meantime, I can send a cameo to Dan Avidan, and he doesn’t care anything about me. But he sure is kind. 

A couple days ago, my art got a lot of attention, and it was amazing. I couldn’t have been happier. But last night, I had one of those C-PTSD dreams I used to have every night. And I think it’s because I always feel like I’m going to let people down.

The dream is under the read more:

In short, I was supposed to visit a friend in the hospital, but I had to go to an amusement park first. I went to the amusement park with another friend, and this friend asked me to get food. So we went to a restaurant. The friend sat at a table while I stood in a very long line waiting. While I was in the line, I ordered. 

It took hours to get through the line. When I finally got to the counter, they put a giant square hamburger patty on the counter, along with a pile of greasy fries. It looked disgusting. Then they told me I was supposed to have paid at the hotel across the street or I couldn’t have my food. That was the first time I’d been told. 

Anyway, I somehow got the food by paying the lady behind the counter in french fries. 

When I went to sit with my friend, though, she was gone. I knew it was because it had taken too long and she was annoyed by the wait, so she went elsewhere. But I was alone and I started crying because I suddenly didn’t know where I was. 

I found her somehow, and when I asked why she left, she said that when she asked someone how long the line would take, she was told it would be a couple days. 

I’ve been over similar dreams before, so I have a really good idea of what it means. Basically, I know I’m sick, and I know I have to “go through the system” to get better. But that takes time. And in that time, I often relapse or have issues that friends won’t stand by. And when they understand how long it might take me to get better, it’s often easier for them to leave and pursue more stable friendships than it is to wait for me to become stable. 

C-PTSD often manifests in dreams that repeat problems you’ve had in the past, and these dreams are often extremely real and believable. When I wake up, it leaves me with a sense of being very anxious and tired. 

I do want to emphasize that I am doing much better than I was a few years ago, but even so, the symptoms are still there, and might always be there. It’s hard to work on something that’s not constantly active, or is so easily avoided.