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jazlynriddle · 1 day ago

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Welcome to your life - Pt 3:

It's My Own Design Ch 6:

Summary:

Ominis fought to control his expression, to keep his hands from trembling. Five years. Five years since he'd seen his parents, and this. This was the reason they'd given him the honour of their time? This was the reason they'd sought him out at Hogwarts?

The bitterness welling up within him was thick enough to gag on.

New year, new allies, new responsibilities, new avenues of revenue, and new aspects of their own Ancient Magic to explore. As the Keeper and their partners enter their last year at Hogwarts, it remains to be seen if the new school year will bring with it new problems or adversaries, but they are confident in the strength of their relationship with Sebastian and Ominis. The three of them would endure, no matter what befell them.

And if they were wrong?

What a joke, they would suffer no alternative.

Warnings: Sebastian x MC x Ominis! Drug Addiction! Spoilers! Slow-burn corruption! Dark content! Fucked up 1800s orphanages! MC has no love for Anne or Solomon! Dubious happy ending (it's happy for MC, Seb and Ominis at least).

You can also read on AO3! (chapter specific warnings below)

Notes:

Warnings: More human experimentation, more so-done-with-this Ominis, more puppy Sebastian and some top 10 anime betrayals type stuff.

Geez, my chapters keep getting longer and longer... I am so tired...

One of my cats needed surgery to remove what are either mammary tumours or just clogged duct glands, which means there's a chance she might have breast cancer, and I'm waiting for the lab test results, which is really stressing me out, she's only 6 years old and that's far too young, I am not prepared to lose her! ToT

Not to mention, my other 15 year old cat got anemia for some unknown reason which is also worrying... Plus all of these expensive vet trips means my wallet is crying, and thus I am exhausted. So, I'm going to take a break and skip the next upload, but don't worry, I'll be back in 4 weeks, sorry! (˚ ˃̣̣̥⌓˂̣̣̥ )づ

“I still don't think you should do this.” Ominis insisted with a frown, wringing his hands anxiously. “There isn't even any real reason to risk it!”

“It'll be alright, Ominis. We're here, aren't we?” Sebastian affectionately bumped his head against Ominis’ while rubbing a hand over his arm. “The pain energy Isidora extracted looks different, but that doesn't make this one dangerous.”

“That doesn't mean it's safe either.” Ominis countered sharply.

The Keeper sighed, setting the jar down on the picnic mat beside them and taking Ominis’ hand, threading their fingers together. “Ominis, I understand your concerns, but if I'm to understand how to relieve Anne's pain, I need to know for sure what I'm even extracting.”

“Then why do you have to test it? Why can't you just keep extracting until you get the same thing that Isidora got?” Ominis shook his head.

“Because I've been doing extractions for the last two weeks, and all we've gotten are three jars of this same new heavy liquid-like pain energy, rather than the smoky bubbly ones Isidora got.” The Keeper sighed. “We're at a bit of a roadblock here. I need to know what we even have, otherwise I can't be sure what else to try.”

“I just-” Ominis clenched his fingers tightly around theirs and took a shaky breath.

“I know.” The Keeper murmured, pressing a kiss to his forehead. “It'll only be a small amount, less than a hit's worth. Even if it's different in a bad way, such a small amount surely wouldn't do much. Isidora’s extracted pain took many hits to have a lasting effect on me.”

“Plus, we have you, Ominis.” Sebastian smiled reassuringly, only for his words to have the opposite reaction, causing Ominis’ expression to cloud even further with fear.

“Whose healer capabilities we will not need.” The Keeper glared at Sebastian, who winced, realising he'd accidentally made it sound like it'd be Ominis’ fault if something went wrong, and he wasn't able to heal them. “But on the off chance that I do need to go to Saint Mungo's, you'll easily keep me alive. I have no doubts, so you shouldn't either. You being here in and of itself is a safety net.”

“That's right. Ominis, you were studying under Nurse Blainey for months and she's had nothing but praise for your progress.” Sebastian quickly followed. “Even if you don't trust yourself, you can trust us, and you should trust your teacher's judgments. Or are you saying that the woman who saved our beloved isn't a reliable healer?”

Ominis blinked at his unexpectedly shrewd approach and the Keeper smiled, there was that quick brain of Sebastian’s at work, he was clumsy, but he certainly could learn. Look at him, working around Ominis’ accountability anxiety with reason.

A soft huff left Ominis’ nose and he nodded with a smile. “I suppose I can't argue with that.”

“Good, because if you did, you'd be dimmer than me and that's a low bar.” Sebastian nodded firmly and the Keeper laughed at his confidence.

“Not sure you're quite that bad.” Ominis chuckled.

“Oh, I am fully aware of my status as the biggest idiot on the planet, but thanks anyway.” Sebastian grinned and placed a kiss on his cheek. “And even a broken clock is right twice a day.”

“I suppose idiots die hard too, so that's kind of a good thing.” Ominis shook his head with a sardonic smile.

“Well then, in that case, we have nothing to fear.” The Keeper grinned as he gave a surprised laugh, deciding that Ominis seemed sufficiently appeased thanks to Sebastian's quick damage control. They released the blond's hand and collected the jar once more, before standing to put some distance between themselves and the boys, just in case.

Taking a few steps away from the picnic mat that they'd just had tea on, in the courtyard under a tree, the Keeper trod carefully across the soft young clovers that were growing and slowly overtaking the grounds. With a quick twist, the jar's cover came off and they lowered the tip of their wand into it, extracting a small bulb from the viscous pain energy gathered at its base.

Anticipation coiled in their chest. The Keeper hadn't been lying about the necessity of identifying the stuff they'd been extracting, but they had, admittedly, been very excited to try it. Holding the small bulb, they paused for a moment. Wait, how do I consume this...

The previous pain energy had been smoky, so inhalation was obvious. This one on the other hand... Well, it was more like a liquid. Swallowing? Tipping their head back and opening their mouth, the Keeper lowered the bulb onto their tongue.

There was nothing like a taste to it nor did it actually feel like anything physical was in their mouth, instead it felt like the morning mist, half there, half not, and it stung slightly as it passed, like alcohol. Streaming down their throat and fizzing in their chest.

The moment the sting evaporated, and the sensation ceased, the Keeper felt a familiar pulse of sweet burning energy flowing and throbbing through their body. Well, at least that was a similar sensation. Though, their heart sure was beating faster, was it excitement?

They pointed their wand at a nearby rock, a little larger than a head. “Accio.”

The rock obediently followed their call, however... the Keeper frowned as it landed on the floor a step away, continuing to roll sluggishly towards them, before coming to a stop at their feet.

“Is everything alright?” Sebastian called out, likely having seen their frown.

“Yes, I feel perfectly fine, just... it's strange, my magic hasn't been enhanced.” The Keeper hastened to reply, wouldn't want Ominis to have a panic attack after all.

“Perhaps it enhanced something else?” Sebastian suggested, standing, and walking towards them with Ominis in tow, since there hadn't been an explosion or anything like that.

The Keeper frowned, somehow, they felt restless. Unlike Isidora’s pain energy that sharpened their focus and senses, this one made them feel something almost akin to a burning itch in their muscles. The urge to pace or kick, their heartbeat pounding in their ears. Something else, eh?

Looking down at the rock at their feet, the Keeper drew their foot back and gave it a light kick.

The rock immediately flew across the field, slamming into a nearby wall of curing bricks and sending the bricks flying.

The Keeper stared at the would-be wall for a second, then at their foot, before groaning, rubbing a hand over their face. “Goddammit, we just stacked that yesterday.”

“Well, at least we know what it enhances now.” Sebastian grinned as he and Ominis came to a stop beside them, adding after a moment. “Also, your eyes are still red.”

“They are?” The Keeper blinked and Sebastian nodded mutely, swallowing the thickness forming in his throat when they turned their burning crimson glow on him. “I wonder why...”

“How are you feeling?” Ominis asked tentatively, reaching a hand out towards them.

“I'm alright.” The Keeper reassured, taking his hand, and resting it upon their chest. “My heart rate seems to have gone up but that's about it.”

Yeah, I think mine has too. Sebastian thought dryly to himself, releasing a heavy breath now that those ruby orbs had slid off him. There was something about their eyes, when they were like that, that made him feel like how he imagined prey would, when sighted by a predator. Though, he wasn't sure fear was what he was feeling.

Moving the Keeper’s hand to his shoulder, Ominis pressed his ear against their chest instead. “Hm. I suppose it's still a reasonable rate, like you've been for a jog.”

“See? I'm alright, love.” The Keeper squeezed his shoulder lightly as he straightened, before they held up the jar. “And, I think I've figured out what this is.”

“Oh? Care to share?” Sebastian asked, struggling to focus on the subject at hand when their crimson gaze returned to him, resting his eyes on their flushed cheeks instead.

“Since it was my physical strength that has been enhanced, I think that this is physical pain, whereas what Isidora extracted was emotional pain.” The Keeper explained, taking Ominis’ hand, and pulling him back towards the picnic mat.

“Emotional pain...” Sebastian hummed as he followed. “Her father?”

“Correct.” The Keeper nodded, taking a seat upon the mat as the red bled from their eyes, fading back into their usual colour. “Isidora was obsessed with relieving her father’s grief, the pain of loss, emotional pain. So, I think we can assume that all of the energy she extracted was emotional pain, which seems to enhance magic.”

“It is true that emotional distress can increase the strength of one's cast, perhaps that's why emotional pain enhances magic.” Ominis hummed thoughtfully, settling down beside them. “I wonder if physical pain energy boosts regeneration as well, since heightened strength and adrenaline aren't the only effects of physical pain. Pain signals the body to increase recovery efforts in the damaged region as well.”

“I have noticed that Macnair’s injuries healed slower after pain was removed, so there is a decent chance of that as well.” The Keeper agreed with a satisfied smirk.

It was quite promising that such a small amount of energy, barely a quarter of a jar, could boost their physical strength so much. Though unfortunately, its duration seemed quite similar to emotional pain as well, since they could already feel it draining from their veins.

Their gaze drifted to Sebastian as he took a seat across from them, his expression rather sombre.

“So, because we put Macnair through physical pain, that's what we got out of him.” Sebastian nodded absently. A few moments of silence passed before he met the Keeper's gaze with narrowed eyes. “Which do you think Anne suffers?”

The Keeper hummed thoughtfully. “That's hard to say, I mean, her pain is caused by a curse, it could be physical since she doubles over like her body hurts, but it could be both because its origin is a magical curse...”

“In other words, we won't know till we try.” Sebastian's eyes were dark as they lowered to his clenched fists, and not in the way the Keeper liked.

“I still need further practice and trial before I can do an extraction without damaging the subject's aura.” They murmured, taking Sebastian's hands in their own, coaxing them to relax and open, rubbing their thumbs against the deep crescents his nails had left in those palms. Those calloused hands, large, and warm like his heart, were the perfect vessel with which to hold the Keeper’s entire world.

Raising his hand and pressing their lips to his wrist, the Keeper met his eyes with a steady gaze. “But I will master it and save her.”

For you.

How long have we been down here?

The flickering light of the cell lamp was almost hypnotic, and Selwyn imagined that he could see patterns forming in indistinct shapes on the floor. Dank and devoid of colour, even the school's mattress of peasantry cloth was more comfortable than the cot he was curled up upon, trying desperately to ignore the screams of his friend tearing away at his sanity.

He didn't know why their captors had only been torturing Macnair, but to his shame, a part of Selwyn was relieved that the Keeper had only ever chained him up and waved their wand over him, seemingly without doing anything, even after their escape attempt.

Speaking of which, Merlin, it was awful not being able to stand on his left leg. Not that there was anywhere in particular to go, but he kept forgetting and putting weight on the foot, only for his ankle to give way and send him careening to the floor.

The Keeper's behaviour had been impossible to understand, and he distantly considered the possibility that the mudblood might simply be insane. Though, it was hard to imagine the ice prince of Slytherin and that cocky bookworm just following along with the whims of a no-name nutjob.

Still, regardless of their three captors' dynamics, the more pressing question... was why Sallow had stopped by his cell to drop off a can attached to a string that led out through the bars.

Put this to your ear, we've got something funny for you to hear.

What the fuck was that supposed to mean? A part of Selwyn wanted to ignore the instruction, but another was curious. It had been far too long since he'd had anything to sate his boredom. He and Macnair would talk through the bars to each other, keeping each other sane, but it wasn't the same as going out or playing.

So, he cautiously picked up the can, placed it against his ear and listened with bated breath.

The silence made the sound of his heart, beating in his ears, feel all the more agitating, each passing second heightening his anxiety and anticipation.

Until finally...

“Does it hurt?”

“Y- yes...”

“Would you like it to stop?”

“P- please... please...”

“But you see, I need someone to experiment on. If it's not you... then I guess it'd have to be your best mate next door.”

The blood in Selwyn's veins felt like ice, his vision swam, and his head throbbed.

“I-”

“Would you like that? For us to torture Selwyn instead?”

His heart pounded in his chest and his grip on the can tightened, beginning to leave indents in the thin metal. He wouldn't, his best friend wouldn't do that, Macnair was all he had in this hell hole-

“...yes...”

“Yes what?”

“P- please... don't hurt me a- anymore...”

“Say it properly, what do you want us to do? Who do you want us to hurt?”

“...please... hur- hurt Oberon... not- not me...”

It hurt...

Those words cutting deep into his chest, were hurting him already.

Words that shouldn't exist. He wanted to unhear them, to erase the memory of his best friend, speaking his name while throwing him under the carriage.

Selwyn clenched his teeth, angry tears welling in his eyes and pouring down his cheeks as he lobbed the can at the wall. He curled up on the bed, his heart aching, chest tight with betrayal, his breath catching in his throat, shaking with sobs as the last comfort he'd had... stabbed him in the neck.

The sound of metal clattering loudly against brick walls, in the neighbouring cell, brought a shark-like grin to the Keeper's face. Macnair had done exactly what they’d wanted, though admittedly, they were a little disappointed in him for it.

“Told you he'd do it.” Sebastian snickered.

“I suppose I was overestimating him.” The Keeper shrugged, even their fellow street rats had some level of ‘honour amongst thieves’ and a semblance of loyalty, what a wanker. “Alright, let's head over while it's fresh.”

At their words, Macnair sagged in visible relief, causing the Keeper's irritation at him to spike, and they gave him a few condescending pats on the cheek with a derisive sneer. “Oh, don't worry, best mate of the year, your torture resumes tomorrow.”

His face paled and Sebastian barked a laugh at his surprised expression. “What, did you think we meant forever? Wow, you're even more disgusting than I’d thought.”

“Sure glad you're not my best friend.” The Keeper shot one last scathing glance at the chained boy before striding towards the door. “Come on, Sebastian.”

“See ya tomorrow.” Sebastian grinned as he followed them out before dropping the boy from his shackles.

“How's the new gate design coming along by the way?” The Keeper asked idly as Sebastian closed the door.

“I've done the calculations, and it should be pretty easy to swap out the swinging doors for sliding ones. Maintenance won't be too much of a problem either, since we can just vanish any dirt.” Sebastian frowned, turning to face them. “The only downside is that it'd take more effort to open and close those doors, since we'd still want them heavy for security...”

“Hm, maybe we can find a way to enchant them to move on their own when unlocked...” The Keeper nodded. “Perhaps we can tie them to the ley lines later.”

“Sure, we can just stick with the swinging doors for now.” Sebastian shrugged.

“Let's get started then.” The Keeper grinned, unlocking, and opening the door to Selwyn's cell. “Oh Selwyn, you poor thing...”

“That's got to hurt, being betrayed like that. You were always following that oaf around, even since first year.” Sebastian smirked. “Were the two of you childhood friends?”

Unsurprisingly, the lump of a boy remained silent, and Sebastian snickered, taking a few quick steps forward to grab him by the arm, only for Selwyn to swing a fist at him.

“Woah there.” Sebastian chuckled, leaning back to dodge the weak swing, and laughing when Selwyn’s momentum carried him off the edge of the bed and onto the floor. “I know you're upset, but you really should know better.”

The snivelling boy glared at him from the floor through tear filled eyes.

“You're lucky we don't want you in physical pain...” Sebastian grabbed him by the collar instead, dragging Selwyn, choking, to his feet. “Yet.”

The Keeper watched with interest as Sebastian chained Selwyn to the wall. What would they find this time?

Taking a step back, Sebastian waved a hand at Selwyn in offering and the Keeper gave him a grateful pat on the head as they approached, drawing their wand. With a deep breath, they began.

Selwyn's aura was saturated.

Absolutely saturated in pain.

The Keeper shifted their wand with excitement, examining the density of pain pulsing through his body’s aura. Unlike physical pain, which radiated outwards from the point of injury, emotional pain seemed to pulse from the heart, spreading its debilitating poison everywhere.

Curiously enough, there was absolutely no difference between physical pain and emotional pain, in the way it presented and affected the body. If anything, the energy in his brain was far more disrupted and erratic than it would be with physical pain, explaining his reckless aggression towards Sebastian.

Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.

A saying that'd been making the rounds recently. Anyone who'd lived on the streets knew the ridiculousness of such a phrase, when words could easily mean the difference between life and death. When deals could be both made and broken, lives destroyed at the word of those with power, when identity and morals alike could be forged and lost with mere words.

Only the pretentious aristocrats spouted such nonsense, and it seemed, that the undeniable truth, was that words could cut deeper than a blade, especially when one had little else. Perhaps it wasn't so strange that it was the street rats who knew this well.

Having finished examining the state of his aura, the Keeper proceeded to extract his pain, twisting their wand as they withdrew, a method they'd found streamlined the energy to minimise tearing. They'd reached the point where they could draw about a fifth of a jar without damaging the subject's aura, but they still needed more practice.

They could probably use more subjects.

Opening their eyes, the Keeper examined the smoky and bubbly glob attached to their wand. Yup, that was the pain energy they'd been taking to boost their magic, the type that Isidora had obsessed over.

“So, it's confirmed then.” Sebastian murmured, offering them an empty jar to store it in.

“Yes...” The Keeper gazed at the energy curiously. “I wonder if there are other things I can extract, besides pain.”

“Now there's a thought. I do wonder what the effects of other emotions and sensations would be when taken.” Sebastian gave a thoughtful hum.

“Only one way to find out.” The Keeper grinned. “But we'll probably need a plan to create those.”

“Good point.” Sebastian nodded. “Though, I doubt it'll be easy to get positive feelings from these guys. What about-”

“No. I'm not doing an extraction on you.” The Keeper cut him off firmly. “I'm nowhere near confident enough that I can do so without causing any damage, and I will not risk either you or Ominis.”

Sebastian grumbled to himself for a moment. “I trust you.”

“And that's lovely, but still no.” The Keeper smiled wryly, ruffling his hair gently. “There can be as many test subjects as we need, but there is only one of you.”

Sebastian's freckles were stark against his flushed cheeks, and he flashed a sheepish grin. “Do you make a habit of picking up boys in dungeons?”

“Not really, but I'd make an exception for you.” The Keeper smirked, before turning their attention back to Selwyn, grabbing a fistful of his hair and lifting his head. “Legilimens.”

The inside of his mind was curiously quiet, compared to Macnair’s after an extraction. They supposed it made sense, emotions were more strongly tied to identity and perhaps extracting his hurt had- no, this numbness and lack of feeling was too vast to be a result of their extraction.

Perhaps, like physical pain, overexposure to emotional pain would cause the body to naturally numb the senses to reduce the damage dealt to one's psyche. It was a good thing they hadn't delayed their extraction then.

That did make them wonder about Isidora’s father, was his pain not also numbed after overexposure? Or was the pain of his loss impossible to numb? Had Isidora’s father simply been a walking corpse, reduced to nothing but pain, kept alive only by her persistence, forcing him to remain in the world of the living?

Then again, the mere idea of losing either Sebastian or Ominis was enough to cause pain within the Keeper, perhaps there were also differences in response to pain, from person to person. They barely knew anything about Selwyn, perhaps this was just how he dealt with pain, by going numb.

Perhaps they couldn't apply the same standards for emotional pain to everybody in the way they'd assumed with physical pain. Perhaps, not even physical pain was the same across all humans either?

It is not your pain to take.

Professor Rackham's words to Isidora abruptly came to mind. Was it possible that Isidora, in her determination to restore his original unbroken self, had begged her father to move on and let go of his grief. That her pleas for him to do something that was not possible, were constantly inflicting new wounds upon his heart?

The Keeper considered what Sebastian had said to them after the whole debacle with Anne, when they'd asked if he'd rather things return to the way they were.

Anne and I have become very different people. We've grown apart over the years, we couldn't go back even if we tried. And... I wouldn't want to have never become friends with you.

The remedy for pain lay in finding new things to live for, not in removing the source of pain forcefully.

The Keeper had experienced their own brush with managing pain and fear, when their addiction to emotional pain energy had become an unhealthy overreliance. They'd only managed to overcome it and gain control over it because of their desire to be free of that crutch. To stand on their own, and thanks to their partners’ support, they'd succeeded.

Isidora never came to this realisation, and with her escapism and denial, she'd harmed her father far more than anything with which fate had dealt him. The Keeper couldn’t imagine doing that to Sebastian or Ominis, to be so fixated and obsessed with a ‘past version’ of a person that they preferred, to the point of rejecting the actual person hurting before them in the present.

To only see the person they had been, rather than the person they are.

Sebastian, in spite of all of his flaws and shortcomings, had been able to grow, to learn to love again, to live again, even after losing Anne in the way that mattered most.

To approach his desire to cure her, not as a desire to return to the past, to undo what has been done, but instead to uphold his promise to her and move forward into the unknown future. To no longer seek a cure as a means of distracting himself from his loneliness and sorrow, his pain and despair, but instead with objectivity and resolve, as a task he'd set himself to.

They hadn’t been exaggerating when they'd said that there was only one of him, and more than ever, the Keeper was determined to help Sebastian, to save Anne so he could move on.

The healthy way, not the way Isidora had tried.

Goddamnit, they really needed more test subjects.

“Here's an idea.” The Keeper hummed, rolling their wand between their fingers as they paced before Macnair’s strung up and quivering form. “The Cruciatus curse is considered to be traumatic enough to cause mental harm as well as physical.”

“Must take a lot more than that to mentally harm you.” Sebastian grinned from where he was leaning against the wall, sounding rather proud of that.

“Come now, love. We both know you weren't putting your all into that one.” The Keeper chuckled.

“Did you want me to?” Sebastian's grin widened.

“Focus, darling.” The Keeper shook their head, before giving him a small smirk. “Maybe.”

His eyes went dark with heat at the confirmation and the Keeper rolled their eyes. Horny boy.

“But the point is.” The Keeper continued. “I wonder what would come from the Cruciatus curse.”

“Hm, well that's what he's for innit? Let's try it out.” Sebastian drew his wand. “Shall I?”

“Hang on. Accio gag.” The Keeper caught the woven rod with straps attached, that flew over to them from the bag on the floor nearby. Forcing Macnair’s jaw open despite his frenzied protests and fastening it to his face before waving a hand at him. “Alright, curse away.”

“Crucio!” Sebastian cast the spell, watching with a sharp grin as Macnair’s body instantly seized up, his eyes bulging and muffled screams squeezing past the gag while the Keeper began examining the boy's aura.

And it was fascinating. The moment the spell hit, his aura exploded with pain, it was everywhere and in such high quantities that they could barely believe their senses. Taking a deep breath, the Keeper began their extraction, only for the stream of smoke that they were pulling out, to become a raging river, and they cursed as an enormous gash ripped open across Macnair’s aura.

“Blast it!” The Keeper's eyes snapped open, what the fuck had happened? They had only caught a wisp of energy, why did his aura-

They stared at the mass hanging off their wand.

“Hey, are you alright?”

The Keeper barely heard Sebastian, too busy staring at the strange glob of energy they'd extracted.

It was... beautiful in a way, like red and black lava rolling endlessly from top to bottom, little bubbles floating and swirling around it, similar to the way Ancient magic would swirl about them when they stood upon the focus point of a Trace.

“Are you alright?” The Keeper jumped when Sebastian placed his hand on their shoulder, startling them out of their reverie.

“Yeah. I'm fine.” The Keeper shook their head, gesturing at Macnair. “Unfortunately, however, he isn't.”

“Did I hold the Cruciatus too long?” Sebastian frowned, scrutinising the boy's panting and limp form as he handed the Keeper an empty jar.

“No, you can't tell, but his aura is torn.” The Keeper grimaced as they shoved the energy they'd extracted into a jar, before returning their wand to scanning his aura. “He looks fine, but his ability to feel is pouring out of him like a faucet. In days or weeks, he'll be an empty husk.”

“Is there a way to repair it?” Sebastian frowned.

“Not that I know of. So far, I've been relying on natural recovery for minor tears, but this one is even bigger than the one Isidora left in her father, and she didn't even seem to notice that she'd torn it in the first place.” The Keeper paused, before scoffing. “Or she was simply insane enough to think that losing one's ability to even feel pain altogether, was a good thing.”

The Keeper eyed Macnair critically, watching the gushing energy pouring from his body like a disturbing misty spray of blood. Perhaps they'd might as well extract everything they could from him before he emptied entirely?

“I'll try to salvage what I can.” The Keeper closed their eyes and attempted to collect the energy bleeding from his body.

Unfortunately, the exact moment that the energy escaped his aura, and hit the air, it instantly evaporated into the atmosphere, rendering it impossible to collect.

Fine.

The Keeper tried instead to collect the energy as it bottlenecked at the gaping wound, but they were thwarted yet again, the flow of the energy being far too aggressive for them to grasp. It was like trying to row a boat upstream, against the current, with their Ancient magic simply getting dragged along by the cascade, out of his body to dissolve with his energy.

Each repeated attempt at fusing their ancient magic with any of the pain flowing out, simply drained their magic, and then said magic was promptly wasted. Aggravating, extremely aggravating. The Keeper was about to adjust their position to try catching anything they could from further up, when they felt a pair of hands take them by the shoulders.

“Okay, I'm going to do an Ominis and say that's enough. You're going to collapse.” Sebastian's arm wrapped around their waist, holding them against his chest to stabilise them, and only then did the Keeper realise that they were teetering like before.

“No, he's draining too quickly.” The Keeper shook their head. “If I miss this chance, I might not get another.”

“Ominis will kill me if I let you continue, and I feel like I'd be killing you by letting you continue.” Sebastian glared at them.

“Ugh, okay, how about you cast Crucio again? It might make the pain easier to draw.” The Keeper sighed.

“...are you just saying that so I'll let you continue?” Sebastian's eyes narrowed with suspicion.

“I'm not. If it doesn't make it easier, I'll stop. Alright?” The Keeper smiled wryly. They were so used to Ominis’ fussing, that it was kind of sweet for Sebastian to be the one doing it for a change.

For several moments, his eyes searched theirs for any sign of deception, before Sebastian's jaw tightened, and his gaze sharpened.

“Deal.” Sebastian turned his glare on Macnair, looking quite pissed, as though it were somehow the boy's fault that the Keeper needed to exert themselves, continuing to support them with one arm around their waist, while he levelled his wand at Macnair with the other. “Crucio!”

The Keeper took a breath and dived back into Macnair’s aura, disregarding the high-pitched shrieks wheezing around his gag, as they attempted to weld their magic to as much of the pain as they could, before it escaped. Seeping into every crevice they could, before sucking all of it back towards themselves, pulling everything they could from his aura without any care for further damage.

“It's... it's working, it's easier to extract now.” The Keeper grimaced at the shakiness of their own voice and could feel Sebastian's arm tense against their body. “Just... a bit more and I’ll stop.”

Their vision was hazy when their eyes opened, depositing what they'd collected into the jar still hanging from their left hand, closing it, and simply letting it drop on the floor before casting Accio to call an empty jar to them from their bag, feeling the slight drain on their magic darken their vision further.

But they couldn't stop now, even with Sebastian's plainly concerned eyes upon them, the Keeper pressed on, they wouldn't get a second chance. Macnair was used up, so they had to make the most of him. They continued to extract, until they had two filled jars of that lava-like energy and Macnair’s throat was so raw from screaming that it no longer produced sound.

With each drain, the amount of pain being created by the Cruciatus curse seemed to become more... diluted, even in spite of the unforgivable. They did want to try and extract more, since this new energy type currently cost an entire test subject, but Isidora’s notes said she passed out during her first extraction, and they felt like they were pretty close to doing the same.

The Keeper sighed as they screwed the cover shut on the second jar. “I think that's... about as much as we'll get. It probably wouldn't... be very... effective to... to con...ti...”

The moment the Keeper's body went limp, Sebastian dropped his wand to catch them with both hands, releasing a soft grunt of effort.

And there they go. He sighed, gazing down at them as their head lolled back against his shoulder, brushing the sweat damp hair from their forehead with a mix of fondness and exasperation. Exactly as he'd expected, they really were pushing themselves to the limit for this. He glared at Macnair, sparing a moment to deliver a firm kick to his leg. Stupid weak purist with a fragile aura-

Naturally, at the impulsive movement, he found his balance to be at risk and grudgingly decided it was more important to keep his Keeper off the floor. Draping their arm over his shoulders and crouching, he hooked his arm under their knees and cradled them to his chest, before snatching his wand from where it'd fallen, and casting a feather-light charm on the Keeper's clothes.

It was tricky to grab the two jars off the floor, but he managed, setting them down in the Keeper's lap temporarily until he could carry them over to the bag and deposit the jars in it. Then came the cumbersome part, crouching again, he balanced his unconscious partner on his knee to sling the bag over his shoulder.

Honestly, as he stepped out of the cell and closed the door behind him, Sebastian was quite proud of himself for getting to that point, and it took him half the walk up the stairs before he realised that he'd forgotten to release Macnair from his restraints.

“Tynx.” Sebastian called out when he reached the second basement landing and the elf promptly appeared beside him.

“Master!” Sebastian had never seen the stoic elf quite so horrified, big eyes wide with fear, and he almost thought Tynx was in legitimate danger of passing out as well.

“They're alright, just unconscious from magic exhaustion.” Sebastian quickly rushed to reassure the elf. “I need you to clean up Macnair's cell and let him out of his chains.”

Tynx frowned at him for a moment, and Sebastian cocked an eyebrow, wondering if the elf was actually being suspicious of him or even considering the possibility that Sebastian had harmed his own lover, before Tynx gave a slow nod. “Yes... sir.”

The elf popped away and Sebastian sighed, well, he supposed it was a good thing that they had an elf that loyal, he probably shouldn't be too irritated about that.

No, the thing he should be irritated about, was his workaholic lover irresponsibly passing out and leaving the gargantuan, monumental, and terrifying job of explaining what happened...

To Ominis.

“Love, I'm fi-”

“You don't get to say that after Sebastian hauled your magically drained arse out of the Dungeons.” Ominis snapped, reaching out to shove the Keeper back down onto the bed, preventing them from sitting up.

“Up three flights of stairs.” Sebastian added, helpfully draping himself across the Keeper's stomach and propping his chin up on his elbows to avoid putting too much weight on them.

The Keeper rolled their eyes. “If you weren't intelligent enough to use a feather-light charm, I shall denounce you as my lover.”

“Of course I did.” Sebastian gasped in mock offence.

“Then what's the difference between carrying me up the stairs and going up on your own?” The Keeper raised an eyebrow.

“Being able to see the steps.” Sebastian replied easily.

There was a pause, before Ominis sighed. “Well, he's got a point, that's dangerous for you people relying on sight.”

The Keeper chuckled. “I'd love if your wand could teach ours how to see the way you do.”

“Why does that sound sexual to me?” Sebastian muttered, sounding genuinely bewildered.

“Get your head out of the gutter.” Ominis rolled up the parchment in his hand and bopped Sebastian on the head with it. “And go back to your homework.”

“Come on, there's still two weeks of holiday left!” Sebastian groaned, dropping his head and his full weight onto the Keeper's stomach.

“Oof- Seb, I love you, but you are not feather-light.” The Keeper shoved playfully at him, only getting a cheeky grin in response.

“The last time I let you procrastinate, you ended up embarrassing yourself, doing your homework in the great hall.” Ominis shook his head.

“Still got good grades though.” Sebastian countered and Ominis’ glare intensified. “Ugh, fine.”

He sighed, dragging himself off the Keeper, and the bed, with some grumbling, before seating himself at the table with his partially finished homework.

With Sebastian out of the way, the Keeper tried to sit up again, only for Ominis to push them down once more, and they groaned, holding his hand to their chest, and dragging him down along with them. “Come on, Ominis, I've been lying in bed for a day now. Any longer and I will surely begin to atrophy.”

Ominis braced himself on the bed, leaning over them with an expression that plainly said, ‘I'm a healer in training and you are spouting hippogriff shite’. “Right, muscle atrophy after lying down for a day.”

“Well, I probably wouldn't atrophy, if we were to do other things whilst lying on the bed.” The Keeper grinned when Ominis ears turned red, and Sebastian burst into laughter from the table.

“Smooth.” Sebastian grinned, before coughing when Ominis shot a glare in his general direction. “That is, don't mind me, I'll just be, er, doing my homework over- over here.”

“Come on darling, I'm feeling much better already.” The Keeper cooed, caressing Ominis’ cheek gently.

His eyes narrowed. “No. You are staying right here, lying down and resting.”

Dropping their head back on the bed, the Keeper gave a long-suffering sigh, releasing his hand and patting him on the arm. “Alright, alright. I give, you win.”

“Good.” Ominis straightened, brushing his hair back primly and the Keeper couldn’t help but smile as he returned to perching elegantly on the edge of the bed with his parchment.

He is so posh, holy shite. How were they fucking such a prim and posh guy? And loving it too. Crazy. If someone had told them three years ago, that they'd be shacking up with a prissy little lord that they willingly bent the knee to, the Keeper would've socked that person in the face, kneed them in the groin and thrown them out a window for such egregious and unfathomable insult.

But God they loved this guy, and his... wand, they hadn't been joking when they said they enjoyed blowing Ominis. It was just as pretty as he was. Then again, Seb's was great too. Hard to compare really, both were great in their own way. It wasn't like the Keeper ever paid much attention to any others’, they had been trying not to, in fact. Perhaps they were just biased because of who these particular magic wands were attached to.

Did I really just think of dicks as ‘magic wands’? The Keeper shook their head. See, this is what happens when I’m too tired to plan and have nothing to do. Certainly quite magical though, undeniably-

Wiggling to the side slightly and resting their head against Ominis’ lap, they asked curiously. “What've you got there darling?”

Smiling helplessly, as though he could tell that his lover was bored and was trying to make it his problem too, Ominis replied simply. “A letter from Poppy, now hush love, I'm reading.”

The Keeper glared at Sebastian when he snickered from across the room, it was probably his fault that Ominis was so apt at shutting bored people down with such finesse in the first place. Sighing, they began entertaining themselves by counting the beauty marks sprinkled along Ominis’ neck while he ran his fingers across the parchment, until he gave a concerned hum.

“What is it?” The Keeper asked, definitely not jumping on the chance to reinitiate conversation.

“Hm, Poppy has asked if she could visit to see the vivariums...” Ominis’ expression was plainly uncertain, and the Keeper frowned.

“We've only finished the ground floor and first floor of the castle. If she visits any time soon, it'll be fairly obvious that we're building all this from scratch.” They shook their head. “We’ll have to deny her request.”

“And exactly how should I go about that?” Ominis frowned, looking rather put out as he set down the letter. “I'd rather not give her the impression I'm rejecting her and cause offence, it was your idea to ask for her help.”

The Keeper sighed, and there came the panicked responsibility pushing, right on cue. Smiling wryly, they sat up, took Ominis’ hands where they were anxiously wringing, and reassured him gently. “You needn't fret so, Poppy is reasonable and if we ask her to respect our wishes, she won't hold it against us, and I would never simply drop such a task like this entirely on your shoulders. We can think of a response together.”

Ominis took a deep breath and returned the comforting squeeze of their hands around his, releasing the breath slowly. “You're right, I- I'm sorry.”

“It's quite alright, I understand that you've been enjoying your penpal friendship with Poppy and are afraid of losing it.” The Keeper smiled, pressing a kiss to his knuckles.

“Hey, at least you never have to worry about offending either of us. With all the violence you've dealt to us, we'd have left ages ago if such a thing were possible.” Sebastian casually contributed with a distracted shrug, staring at his parchment with a slightly confused frown.

The Keeper blinked at him for a moment. Well, was that blunt? Yes. Was that direct? Yes. Was that missing the point? Also, yes. But was he wrong? Actually... no.

“What Sebastian's trying to say is that you can always rely on us to have your back, no matter what you say or do.” The Keeper rephrased for him.

Across the room, Sebastian raised his head, and now it was his turn to blink. “Wow, that sounded much better than what I said.”

Ominis frowned, hesitating for a few moments before quietly asking. “...do you think I would?”

“Wouldn’t complain if you did, but we don’t expect you to.” The Keeper smiled.

“Yeah, you mother us enough already.” Sebastian's tone was dry, yet his affection was still plain despite that.

Ominis chuckled, blinking rapidly for a breath, and swallowing around the lump in his throat. “Alright... then, do either of you have an idea for how to turn her down gently? I’m quite at a loss.”

“Well, we don't have to turn her down fully, she just can't come over right now.” Sebastian's expression became thoughtful. “We'll most likely be done with the castle long before the end of the coming school year. So, we can just say that she’s welcome to visit then, at least it's a timeframe.”

“We can probably get away with saying that I don't want the half-finished project to be seen.” The Keeper nodded, before giving a casual shrug. “I don't exactly have a reputation for letting people see me practising or stuff like that. And I study with you two.”

“That's true...” Ominis hummed softly, his expression slightly guilty. “Are you sure you want to take responsibility for rejecting her? I mean, I did say earlier- but I don't want you to feel forced...”

“It's fine, Ominis. I don’t mind, she's probably used to it at this point.” The Keeper chuckled.

“You're not even lying per se, it's true that the vivariums will be done by the end of the school year, and they don’t even let people copy their homework.” Sebastian grinned. “See? We told no lies.”

Ominis’ distant stare became sharp with silent judgement, and Sebastian cleared his throat, sitting upright in his chair defensively. “What? Look, it's not like that time, alright? Not like Poppy's going to track us back to Dìon to see if we're lying and insert herself into-”

“And I think that you should start penning your letter in response before you begin to forget what we discussed!” The Keeper quipped brightly, patting Ominis on the shoulder while shooting Sebastian a glare that very clearly told him to shut up before he triggered Ominis further, which he wisely obeyed.

Begrudgingly, Ominis stood and went to find his self-writing quill while Sebastian returned to his homework to distract himself from that guilt inducing memory lane, his shoulders hunched with shame, and the Keeper flopped back onto the bed with a tired sigh. Well, at least they were more tired now, probably be a good idea to follow healer's orders and get more rest...

The sound of Ominis unexpectedly walking back into the room caught their attention and the Keeper raised their head to watch as Ominis set down a steaming teacup beside Sebastian.

“Here, some hot tea will help you relax and focus.” Ominis sighed, and the brunet's face practically lit up, his eyes suspiciously shiny.

“Thanks, Ominis.” He partially stood, just high enough to place a kiss on Ominis’ cheek, getting a gentle pat on the head in return as Sebastian sat back down to concentrate on his homework with a lighter atmosphere about him. While the blond wandered off to the other side of the room and drew the curtain for some privacy as he used his quill.

A soft and relieved smile spread across the Keeper's face. It was nice being reminded that they didn't always have to intervene, like a soldier on guard duty, that the two boys had their own form of communication that predated their inclusion.

That despite the differences between Ominis and Sebastian, their difficulties communicating with each other and their rocky past, they still insisted on being together. Their love, and determination to make each other happy, to lessen each other's hurt, was quite sweet. Like a cat and a dog trying to live together and groom each other in their own way. Their differences only made the miracle of their relationship all the more beautiful.

As the Keeper closed their eyes, they were filled with warmth and happiness at being a part of this beautiful thing. It made every effort worth it.

They made every effort worth it.

Notes:

Tynx: The master managed to carve a perfect rectangle into the bedrock of Dìon's hill without breaking a sweat. What in Merlin's name could they have done that was intensive enough to make them pass out from exertion??? (｡ŏ_ŏ) Maybe I should walk down, in case the whole dungeon is gone...

The way a person sees themselves and the way others see them are rarely the same. Relationships, I find, are a struggle to understand and recognise both. Which of course, can be hard, especially in the event that a person's view of themselves is, in fact, drastically different from the person everyone else sees them as.

Healthy romantic love seeks to love both the person you think your partner is, and the person your partner thinks they are, while disregarding the person you wish they were.

A person should never be placed on a pedestal nor should one's world rely upon another person forever remaining unchanging and immutable, because all people grow and change, due to interaction with the world and their experiences. All people change over time and we kinda have to always be prepared for that and be prepared to accept that.

Your idea of who another person is should not stagnate and become cast in stone, otherwise you will one day blink and realise that you don't know the person in front of you at all. It takes effort to remain up-to-date on a person's emotional and mental state.

Both Selwyn and Anne learnt this the hard way.

“I can fix him/her/them” is not something anyone should seriously think, when entering a relationship, the only person that can fix them is themselves. It's their own choice if they want to change and loving someone means being ready to love them forever even if they never “get better” or become the person you hope they will. All you can do is be ready to support them if they do want to change.

Humans are not built equal and the best relationship dynamic is when both/all parties are willing to pick up each other's slack and cover for each other's shortcomings, or hobble clumsily together through something both/all parties are bad at. Despite knowing that the specific distribution of slack-picking will not ever be logistically equal, a healthy relationship is one where the effort is equal and appreciated by each other.

Ominis may not be able to commit to decision-making, but his partners are willing to pick up that slack for him because they can see and appreciate that he does care and put in effort for them too, as shown through his grace when Sebastian shoots himself in the foot.

Due to all of this, compatibility with (or at the very least, understanding of) each other's love language is important for relationships as well. While incompatibility can be worked around with enough effort and dedication (which makes it more fun to write in fiction), in reality, it's more sustainable to be someone who makes your partner feel happy just by being yourself and doing things that don't require much effort, and vice versa.

And, to be clear, these all apply to both romantic and platonic relationships.

I do hope you guys don't mind me waxing pretentious poetry in these notes, I just have a lot of thoughts on relationships between human beans xD

Okay, I may, more accurately, be a little obsessed with it...

#hogwarts legacy #ominis gaunt #sebastian sallow #gender neutral mc #mc x sebastian sallow #mc x ominis gaunt #sebastian x ominis #sebastian x ominis x mc #hogwarts legacy fandom #hogwarts legacy fanfic #hogwarts legacy fanfiction #fanfic #jazlr welcome to your life #jazlr #lgbtqia #nonbinary

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giantkillerjack · 1 year ago

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Yeah bro sounds like you're autistic as fuck!

Please have this alpaca #Squad gif that I send to every person I encounter who is figuring out they are autistic! One of my friends sent it to me when I figured it out for myself, and it meant a lot to me.

So before I say anything else, I want to affirm that self-diagnosis is absolutely just as valid as an official medical diagnosis from a doctor, and anyone who tells you otherwise is being extremely ignorant of the state of mental health care in many parts of the world. - In America, the majority of autism care involves abusing autistic children (ABA therapy, etc), or otherwise trying to "cure" autism (which is not possible and only causes harm). And that's before we get into how hard it is to access and afford doctors in the first place, especially for Black Americans and members of other already-marginalized groups seeking healthcare professionals that won't traumatize them.

I think it was very smart of you to make this post, because I truly believe that a group of autistic people is more likely to give you an accurate diagnosis than a group of allistic doctors.

And in my experience, every time I've heard someone be as close to being sure they are autistic as you seem to be, they have turned out to be autistic.

So let me validate for you that if you think you are autistic, then you are probably autistic. And if you say you are, then I will take you at your word, and thus I welcome you with open arms to this community and this label/identity!

And just fyi, if you genuinely think you are autistic, and then you find out later that you were wrong, well guess what! You've hurt no one in your honest search for help and understanding! I'd much rather you have access to support and community than you NOT have those things for fear of, idk, receiving much-needed support and advice under a label that later turns out not to suit you. Impostor syndrome about being autistic seems to be a step for almost everyone who is diagnosed outside of childhood. I feel you belong here. And if you feel that too with all the evidence you just listed, that is more than enough and also you are ultimately the expert on your own experience.

Everything you said sounds like the definition of autism, and so I have good news and I have bad news:

Bad news first: as a culture, we do not know what autism looks like without trauma. This is one reason why sometimes it can be hard to diagnose - so many of the symptoms we associate with autism are actually just symptoms of complex post-traumatic stress disorder. Growing up autistic without the support you need in a society that is not meant for you is traumatic, and so basically all of us have complex PTSD. Which is like regular PTSD, but... worse and harder to treat, since it is not the result of a single traumatic experience but rather it is caused by repeated sustained trauma that takes place over the course of months or years.

If you can find a therapist with autism, I highly, highly recommend it. But since that is a pretty tall order, be sure to at least avoid medical professionals that support the hate group Autism Speaks, and run away from anyone who supports ABA therapy for children. Because you almost certainly have cptsd, and you don't deserve the pain and self-hatred that comes with untreated or poorly-treated trauma. But please at least know that the really negative thoughts you have about yourself are not a function of logic and fact, but rather an involuntary function of psychological damage, and that is not your fault, and it CAN get better.

Another good thing to know is that autistics and other people who have spent a lot of their lives with their guard constantly up often develop fibromyalgia or other types of chronic pain. This is something that a lot of doctors don't seem to know, and something you should keep in mind. This is also another reason why it is so important try and seek safe treatment for your mental illness and to, over time, try and learn to relax your body and to live openly as yourself. Doing so can reduce the likeliness that you will develop chronic pain from the stress. Unmasking after a life of being forced to mask is a skill that takes time and practice, but it is a very rewarding practice.

However, if you do develop (or already have developed) chronic pain like I did, then your life is not over and you are not alone in this. Disability can be managed and accommodated, even if it can't generally be cured, and a full, happy life is still very much possible.

(Autism is also a disability, and it is disabling in different ways for different people - either inherently or due to lack of social supports. It isn't a matter of "low-functioning" vs "high-functioning", but rather a matter of how much support someone requires to meet their needs. And it is absolutely possible to lead a wonderful life and be autistic, and I wouldn't want to be cured even if it was possible.)

And now some probably much-needed good news: Being autistic is good, actually. As in, that uncontrollable urge to react with movement and joy when a special interest comes up in conversation - the one that you described as really abnormal? That's actually normal for autistics! and it is something that allistics don't get to have. At least not in the same way. That big, bright, beautiful, all-encompassing, soul-bursting joy in an everyday event is indicative of the truth about autistics, which is that the more we are allowed to be ourselves, the more unedited, unrepressed wonder we can feel and share from our souls.

We are meant to be allowed to twitch and fidget and regulate through stimming, and since this sort of thing was cruelly stamped out of most of us from a young age, coming to understand that we are autistic and then seeking out the words and experiences of others like us allow us to start reconnecting with a version of us that doesn't feel SUPER FUCKING STRESSED ALL THE TIME. Or, rather, for many of us, to create that version of ourselves for the very first time.

So much of what I love about myself is profoundly autistic: the way I've learned how to make people feel safe, the way I can teach myself most anything if i love it enough, the way I fall in love with people with every vibrant molecule of my being, the deep sense of justice I feel, the drive to care for people and creatures that need help. My patience. My talents. When I listen to music, I see gorgeous music videos in my head! I see color and movement and emotion brought to life! What a gift!!! Without my autism, i would never have been driven to become a skilled artist or a meaningful storyteller. I wouldn't have attracted my wonderful autistic wife with whom I discuss our mutual special interests for hours and hours every day! Autism gives my life such warmth and color. Me without autism isn't me.

And now even MORE good news: Other autistics make awesome friends and romantic partners. We are all individuals, so obviously there's no guarantee. But guess who's not gonna be a dick about autistic sensory needs or not making eye contact or being asked to change their behavior to make you feel safer and more comfortable? Autistics, bay-bee!!!!

Guess what folks have the potential to intensely and enthusiastically bond together like a couple of hyperfixated magnets who unabashedly love something?? FOLKS WITH A TOUCH OF THE 'TISM, THAT'S WHO.

You have likely been made to feel unwanted, difficult to befriend perhaps - and this was cruel and unjust. So much of what people harshly and unfairly judge are just harmless idiosyncrasies or disabled needs.

Talking too loud and then someone tells you to "shut the fuck up for once"? Actually, THEY'RE the asshole here, and they are exploiting the fact that you won't be sure of social protocols to exert social power over you, and that makes them EXTREMELY FUCKING LAME. When I am shouting while I speak without realizing it, my autistic wife just says, "Jack, you're shouting," and I go "woops!" And keep talking but a little quieter.

I have found that knowing I am autistic helps me to advocate for myself because I am better able to tell when someone is being unfair to me. (It is shocking to me how many things I used to hate myself for were just... absolutely harmless instances of awkwardness or confusion. I was weird! I was kind! I am still both of those things! And it turns out only the kindness ever actually mattered!)

But also what helps is having people in my life that treat me right and respect my boundaries. People who make me feel Good about being who I am.

There are times in our lives, especially if we are not in control of our own schedules and finances, where those kind and helpful people might be difficult or even impossible to find. That is not your fault, any more than it was mine.

But it is vital to remember during those times that these people DO exist, that they are worth looking for, and that our earnest love and kind friendship is a goddamn treasure that anyone would be lucky to have. And someday, you'll meet some of the millions and millions of people who can understand this. You deserve that.

In the meantime, do anything and everything you can to reduce your stress.

So, uhhhhhhh, yeah. Welcome to the squad!!!

Okay so I need people are who are diagnosed as autistic to help me out here

I been suspecting for a long time (like around a year, maybe more idk) than I might be autistic, and I did research (genuinely, not just taking some Internet quiz and self-diagnosing based on it) and I want to know if there’s a genuine chance I might be autistic, or if I have a wrong view on autism (basically, if I’m wrong about it and what it means to be autistic).

Some things than happen to me than I’ve seen also happen to a big amount of autistic people

-Problems with food since very little. Not based on taste, but texture. Eating something with the wrong texture is just horrible.

-Always felt different from my peers, never quite fitting in because I didn’t know how to interact with them. As if they knew exactly what to do and I was just flying blind. I heard people say than they felt as if everyone was born with a book of rules, meanwhile they had to learn from watching everyone else already know them, and I think that’s the best way for me to explain it.

-Intense interests on stuff, really intense. Like, is all I can think about day and night, I relate everything to it in some way or another, I know everything about it down to the smallest detail, some might call me obsessed and I wouldn’t deny it. Reminds me of the way people with autism describe their hiperfixations.

-People thought I was “gifted” as a kid, and said than I was a kid with the mind of an adult. I’m no genius, I was just interested on different stuff than other kids. I was the first one to learn to read and I never stopped. I basically lived in the library as a kid. I have a vivid memory of when I must have been like 10 and saying than my favorite thing in the world was reading and some friends looking at me like I was crazy. I’m mentioning this not because people who are autistic are “gifted”, but more because I heard they are usually interested in different stuff than their peers (doesn’t have to be more mature, it can be more immature stuff too, I think. Goes hand in hand with feeling different from everyone). Continuing on books, I also always had a higher reading level than the rest of my class. I was “a pleasure to have in class but should speak out more” kid.

-Looking back they were obviously bullying me, but I thought than they were laughing with me, not at me.

-I can’t hear the tone of my voice?? For some reason?? Sometimes I speak too loudly or too quietly or my mom says I’m being rude for “talking back” but in my head my voice is the same level and uses the same tone. So if I’m ever rude I probably don’t notice (I hate being rude to people).

-I read about overstimulation and under stimulation and it perfectly described the way I feel a lot of time. Specially overstimulation.

-If talking about something I really enjoy (hiperfixations?) I can’t be still. I’ll probably smile and fidget with something and the mere mention of it or anything regarding it outside of online spaces makes me want to scream out of excitement. Like, a really abnormal reaction to it, I believe.

-I prefer to be home on my own than outside (specially if there’s lots of people around). I don’t know if it’s hard for me to see how people are feelings, given than I learnt to notice when people don’t want me somewhere (eventually you get used to it) but sometimes when people are being nice to me I’m completely unable to see if they’re being genuine or not. An example, I was forced to spend a week sharing a room with this pair of really popular girls because of a school trip, and they were nice to me, starting conversations and stuff. So because they seemed nice, I thought they were nice. But at the end of the week I approached them and they gave me the dirtiest look and I realize they weren’t actually being genuine, they were just kind of being forced to be nice to me.

-I hate changes of routine, everyday I have the same routine and if someone wants it to change (go somewhere and do something together) they have to tell me at least a day in advance. Unless I really like them, I will feel uneasy to change my routine because it makes me feel as if I was messing everything up.

-I don’t know if it has anything to do with this, but I’m adding it just in case. I hated physical touch as a kid. Up until some years ago, I couldn’t stand it. Also don’t know if it’s related, but I always had trouble sleeping, I heard that might be a symptom but I don’t know.

-I went to a speech therapist as a kid because I couldn’t pronounce the letter s and I pronounced it as z, sometimes it still comes out. I heard problems in speech might be related but I doubt it, just adding just in case.

-I have a big sense of justice. For example everyone in my class cheats on their exams (they don’t even hide it, ism ore, they brag about it), and that has always upset me. Not because they can copy while I actually study, but because cheating is wrong. That’s not how it works. Why are they breaking the rules. Or for example they bring their phones to school (not nearly as bad as cheating) which is forbidden, and I don’t understand why they do that. It’s forbidden, so why?

-I notice patterns in almost everything, I also focus more on the little details than the big picture, which leads to both overthinking but also better results.

-I need people to speak to me separately. Having a conversation with two people at the same time feels like a nightmare.

-I need people to tell me things, if they want me to do them. If you made something for me to eat, don’t just put it on the table, tell me it’s for me. Otherwise I won’t touch it out of fear it’s not mine. When given instructions, I need them to be clear and detailed. All people my age are doing stuff like going to parties, drinking alcohol, meanwhile I never think of doing it and also, never knew I could do it? When did the change between going to the park to hang out without our parents for the first time and going to a party with alcohol around lots of strangers happened? Why did no one told me? How do everyone just know when to change and grow up? Why don’t I?

-Something I also noticed is than every fictional character I related to had various autism symptoms (said by people on the fandoms who are actually autistic).

#original #autism #autistic pride #autism positivity #cptsd #fibromyalgia

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mageiathea · 2 years ago

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Oh look I wrote more fic:

Josh loved being First Gentleman. He had almost all of the power of the Presidency, and he rarely had to be nice to anyone. Being nice, personable and inspiring was Sam’s job. Josh’s job was to browbeat everyone into submission; a job he was very, very good at, especially since he could be as ruthless as he wanted to be.

Thus, Josh was meeting with the Secretary of Labor and yelling at her about minimum wage.

“I don’t care how hard it’s going to be,” Josh said, voice loud and filled with irritation, “we’re serious about a yearly minimum wage increase. Now get with your people and figure out some legislation that will make it happen. I already have sponsors waiting in the House and Senate, so quit dragging your feet.”

“Sir, we have to be very-”

“What part of shut up and get it done don’t you understand?”

“Yes, sir, thank you sir,” replied the Secretary, and she left Josh’s office a little quicker than was polite.

Josh leaned back in his chair and sighed. Normally he wouldn’t get this annoyed about someone not doing what he wanted them to do, but this week Josh had been especially stressed out.

Suddenly the door between his office and the Oval Office next door opened, and Sam stuck his head in. “Let me guess, Blake wasn’t especially accommodating on minimum wage.”

“Sorry for being too loud,” Josh said apologetically as Sam came all the way in and shut the door behind him.

“Actually that was my fault, I left my door open. Possibly on purpose.”

“Why’s that?”

Sam crossed his arms as he leaned against the door. “I wanted an excuse to see you in case I was about to bite someone’s head off while in a lively and spirited discussion about East Asian textiles.”

Josh raised his eyebrows. “Were you?”

“I was about to bomb every sweatshop in China.”

“Please tell me you’re not still upset about Foley’s anti-gay marriage bill.”

“He’s introducing it today.”

“You know no one is taking it seriously.”

“Maybe we should introduce an anti-straight marriage bill, see how he likes it. I’ll even write a speech about how unnatural it is, and throw in some biblical quotes. I’m sure I could find some.”

Josh frowned. Sam only got like this when he was really upset about something. “Listen, why don’t I take the rest of your meetings today and you work on the minimum wage speech.”

Sam shook his head. “I’ll be fine, I just needed to vent a little, that’s all.”

“You sure? I’ll be glad to rip into some East Asian textiles.”

Finally that got a smile. “Thanks though, I better get back in there before they declare me AWOL and send in the secret service.”

“All right, then.”

After Sam left, Josh got up and opened his door to the Oval Office and stood next to the other door, listening to the muffled voices. Just as he was about to leave he heard Sam yelling “Why don’t we just ban clothes from China instead!”

Josh let out a sigh. He hadn’t seen Sam this pissed off in a long time. He went back to his office, closing the door this time, and turned on his TV to C-SPAN. Suddenly there he was, speaking on the House floor, Congressman Foley in all his bigoted glory.

There was a loud snapping sound, and Josh looked down to see that he had broken the pen he was holding.

“That’s it, this guy’s had it.”

#the west wing #fanfic #to be continued when I finish writing it

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adrianasunderworld · 2 years ago

Note

Hi!!! Okay girl, this is realll random but there's something that's been rotating in my mind and Ms. Rosehearts was stressing me out fr so I was like WAIT BUT HOW BOUT THE OTHER COOLER NICER MOMS and I think you'd enjoy the situational chaos so

Hear me out

The moms have a book club.

But it's really just a front for the REAL Yuu protection squad and also gossiping about their children LMAO.

I really love twisted wonderland mothers! They all sound like strong, compelling individuals (save for some Ms. Rosehearts PLS sit down maam😭😭😭)! Like, Mrs. business -woman-married-her-divorce-lawyer-owner-of-the-best-resturant-of-the-seas-girlboss Ashengrotto????? Ms. loving-caring-badass-single-mother-i-care-deeply-about-my-son-and-he-knows-and-loves-me-back-so-much-so-that-he-constantly-strives-to-be-a-better-person Spade???? Mrs. breaking-social-social-norms-marrying-the-man-i-love-probably-been-in-a-war-or-at-least-had-cool-sword-training-the-CROCODILE-FAE-HERSELF Zigvolt????? I like to think that over multiple breaks/events Yuu tags along with one (some?) of the boys and mom/grandma/aunt/whateverlmao just, just loves this kid and is like aw hi hon nice to meet you is my son being troublesome at school?😊💕💕💕 i hope not😇😇😇 and

...wait

ur alone??? w/o any resources or connections??? being taken advantage of by a scheming, fugly crow??? (and if it's Ms. Yuu, BBY UR A MAGICLESS GIRL IN A PRESTIGIOUS ALL BOYS MAGIC ACADEMY???) basically queen Asha but then add in mom authority and multiple mothers lmao

Like, there's a PTA meeting or a parents week lmao and Ms. Leech, Ashengrotto, Zigvolt, Spade AND YOU KNOW WHAT. EPELS GRANDMA, MAMA LILITH, AND QUEEN ASHA TOO BC SLAY MALLEUS' GRANDMA TOO???? etc... come over to check up on the prefect and they're all like

Thus begins the OP Yuu protection squad and they use a Mom's book club as a front (maybe they were a book club at first anyway???? Lmao idk logistics) and its just like

Mrs. Ashengrotto: Heyyyy bby, do you need a job over breakkk aha cool bc the restaurant has an opening and OOP oh no! the ice cream machine is broken :(((( looks like you can't do your job :((( oh, sweetie don't worry about your paycheck it wasn't your fault you'll still get paid, aw, these ice cream machines really need to break less :((( sighhhh, it's okay love, anyway do you wanna go shopping with me???

AND I THINK MAMA ASHENGROTTO WOULD BE HILARIOUS IN PARTICULAR BC THINK OF THE POWER WE'D HAVE OVER AZUL

Azul: AHA! You're now indebted to me and owe me all your robux AND a lifetime of indentured servitude whhhAT ARE YOU DOING

Yuu: CALLING YOUR MOM BITC-

Power. Yuu'd be the most powerful person on campus. Think of the baby photos. The childhood stories. THE BABY PHOTOS. Meanwhile they'd also be getting advice from this circle of wise, beautiful women who also can give the smack down on any poor teenage boy that breathes incorrectly in Yuu's direction. I also think this could be absolutely incredible for a Ms. Yuu, who would suddenly have female connections all around twisted wonderland after being deprived for so long. Maybe free period stuff. A heating pad. Handmade dresses instead of our sad, overworn uniform bc we literally dont have any other clothes😭😭😭 Like, just,,,, female advice about survival in this new world while maybe also having tea, in depth discussions about literature, and teasing their boys. A comfy circle occasionally held in ramshackle dorm about art and gossip and caring for a kid who hasn't been cared for in a long time

Ms. Spade: So ladies, what's the schedule over spring break?

Queen Asha: I will have them assist me in court for the final two weeks. I belive that perhaps Zigvolt...?

Mrs. Zigvolt: Yuu inquired about dental practices in magically structured locals such as Briar Valley. My family will take them in during the first weekend of break.

Yuu can be in the bookclub too. Just to rant and snitch about their classmates. Bestie deserves it. There can be a group chat. Love it. And if this ever takes a romantic direction...

Mrs. Leech: You know, Yuu would make such a fantasic in-law.🤭😇😊😊😆💕🌸🌸💕🥺🙂

Queen Asha: Indeed.

Queen Asha Internally: leonagetyourSHITtogetherleonaliterallyplsleonailovethemsomuchboymovebeforeimoveFORyouomlLEONA-

Like, Mrs. Leech and Ashengrotto would totally tag team this bc theyre besties and if one of their sons wins they both win meanwhile someone like Mrs. Shroud (maybe? Idk how to feel about the Shroud parents LMAO) would be loosing her MIND

And speaking of

🎆women🎆

Yuu: GUYS.

Yuu: omf-

Najma: what

Yuu: You will not believe the SHIT your brothers pulled today istg---

Yuu:

Sebek's Sister: DJDJDJDHFJGJDJSJSJD

Yuu: its the second time this week

Najma: PLS

Sebek's Sister: babe it's literally tuesday????💀😭😭😭😭

Yuu: save. me.

Najma: no <3

Sebek's Sister: how are you still alive

girls Yuu's age ready to make fun of their brothers at any given moment???? yes??? hello??? the rants??? the insults??? the hilarity??? the 3am memes??? sign me up. Najma is literally RIGHT THERE and she's only had less than one chapter of sceen time total and i would still die for her

Anyway

Yay women. At this point I honestly dont care about the boys just let me be besties with their moms and sisters and we can get starbucks or sth

Yay women.

Lmao thats it thanks for all you write for us its appreciated love ur humor thank you for reading this far hope all is well in life byeeee <3333

You're right, I love everything about this. 🥰

There is just just much potential to unfold here. With exception of event characters like Granny Felmeir and Najma, all female characters are all off screen. So we kind of have to fill in the blanks of who these women and how they act, and that is where the fun comes in.

Especially for a Miss Yuu, because by default the whole situation raises many questions and concerns that all the mama bears come out. Yuu gets more care packages than their sons. "What do you mean why am I sending her things? You have everything you need and she has nothing. Now be sure to ask if she liked the cookies I sent." Yuu went from barely scraping by to being in want of nothing in just a few months.

We all know Asha, we all know Lilith. I just know Deuces mom is so nice and offers to have her over for breaks if she ever needs it. "Does she have any family? No? Invite her for the holidays right now!" Or Sebeks mom, I like to headcanon that Mrs. Zigvolt is more or less twisted from Fauna, so she is the sweetest lady alive. Her children are her everything and she cannot stand the thought of Yuu being all alone. She will not stand for it.

Mama Ashengrotto and Mama Leech are instigating each other, I just know it. They both like Yuu and love having her around. Theyre going to set up some Kiss the girl type scenes for their sons and hope it works. If Azul or the Tweels win they both win.

I feel like they all have a friendly competition to see whose son Yuu ends up liking. The race to be her mother in law if you will.

Mama Ashengrotto: What's that land saying? We all have a horse in this race.

Queen Asha, thinking about Leonas shitty love letters: I think my horse is broken.

---

Meanwhile Yuu is having a blast with the sisters. Having everyones mom around means having their sisters pop in, and Najma and Sebeks sisters are pretty much the closest in age to her and are fun to hang out with. They want all the info on wtf their brothers are doing and laughing at all the phots of their fuck ups.

Anyway Yuu needs more female friends.

#twisted wonderland #miss yuu #twst oc

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ayazure · 3 years ago

Text

Losing

– "I don't want to hurt you anymore.. my words as a menace may not look too promising, but I swear"

This is part 2 of menacing, please read part one here :)

Genre : angst, Scaramouche x you

Warnings : abandonment issues, moving on, heartbreak, petnames, gn!reader

Scaramouche is in the midst of living in guilt. It's been one and a half year and things were changing in his perspective. Still, he can't get you back at this point. For the mistakes he made caused greater damage, especially to you.

"Sweetheart?" ever since you closed the door on him, he never heard a single utter of word from you. He was going to lose you and it's all his fault. Yet his heart resorted to his menacing habits just to get you back.

Those sobs weren't fake, those were his despair and guilt that served as tears and sounds. Anger got the best of him really, resulting in attempts to kill you (as a threat, we could say). These can never dispose of the fact that he made a lot of complications, tearing the one mutual love you two had.

His fatui underlings helped him open the door and as expected, you were gone.. from his sight and his life. He lived in despair after that, guilt and urges eating him up.

Scaramouche would always have the recollection of him laying by your side after a busy day at work. You'd already be sleeping by then. Seeing your peaceful resting face–it always eased his stress, his worries.

Ever since he strived to search for his vessel and heart, he went sort of mad. Meeting you, he'd say he already found his heart and it's you. You who eased his every pain even if you were just beside him. The y/n he would give kisses to when you fall asleep. The one he can't stop staring at and always mutter words of affection.

'Why can't he do the same when you're awake?'

Truth be told, he was actually embarassed. He's the kind of person who is only willing to show emotions in private. That was a mistake on his part since it ended up with him neglecting you.

He thought about it and he would declare that he was to be held accountable. Nothing was your fault, his heart says so. Every night, he would be so eager to go to the bedroom only to be greeted with reality telling him that you were not there anymore.

Tears would fall of course, missing your whole entirety in his arms. The way you would try to make him smile. And how he regrets treating you that way. He knows you'll never forgive him but he doesn't want to trek this path anymore.

Thus, he quit his position; proceeded to stay in the surburbs of inazuma as nothing but a lowly citizen. Not that lowly, he had enough money to get by. When his bloodthirst comes, he thinks of you, taming down his urges until he got used to it. He kept living because of you and you didn't have to do the same.

For you were happy now. Your import and trading business skyrocketed. You were rich, maybe even richer than your ex lover. Ah, your ex lover, you'd think about him several times. And thought about how he was painstaking memory now..

Not until,

As you were walking down the tranquil streets of the city, you were grabbed to the side, steering you towards a back alley. "I swear if you lay a finger on me-" you threatened.

"Y/n it's me, please put the dagger down" you do recognize that voice. However, confused as it sounds calmer than its usual demeanor. The person lets you go and you did a pivot to face him. "Scaramouche?!" You exclaimed, feeling the fear and shock at the same time.

The moment you faced him, he kneeled down, weeping. You were too stunned to dare utter anything. "I'm not here to hurt you in anyway, I want to.. let out these stupid feelings. To apologize to you, I.. I've been such a psycho to you"

He looked up to your dazed face, with eyes glistening in tears. "Nor am I here to beg to you, to plead for your forgiveness because.. you don't have to. I feel so sorry, I was in the wrong this whole time and that I made you feel fear and disappointment"

You were guilty for still thinking that he's ever so suspicious. Him kneeling infront of you feels way too surreal already. His hands were bare, scarred, still holding onto both of yours. You noticed how his outfit wasn't the fatui uniform anymore. It was a normal yukata, worn by any other inazuman citizen.

With this, he was more than sincere.

"Scaramouche.. stand up" you ordered him to do so. He follows obediently, though his head is bent down, facing the dusty ground.

"Look at me" he doesn't, he was still ashamed. You had to caress his face, tilting his to meet your eyes. "I don't know what you've been up to lately, my mind tends to reminds me of you at times. I was wondering if you were still a menace. With you here right now, I can say that you aren't. Though, if you attempt another monstrosity, I won't hesitate to use my dagger." You say in all seriousness.

His face was bit more relaxed knowing you trusted him even just a bit. He had no ill intents and he just wants a proper closure. But, his heart was still grasping for that little hope of second chance.

"I did my best to change this time and I want you to know that you were my inspiration. I quit the organization" he then says, softly.

You never thought that he would do such a thing since he was a man with clear intact goals. He dedicated himself to the fatui and yet..

"Scara.."

"Y/n I also want you to know that I still love you, even though.. even though you won't forgive me. I will accept anything you say and I won't mind"

You could still see the hope in his eyes, but with a bit of a restraint since he did say that he's fine with whatever answer you throw him.

Your heart shatters repeatedly, you can feel the bitterness in your mouth.

"I loved you.." you start off, caressing his face. His expression was even more heartbreaking but he was trying to smile, shrugging off the pain.

"I can't give you a second chance since .. I'm engaged now"

The guy infront of you bit his lip as if he was trying to hold back any falling tears. Some broke off and you wiped them gently.

"I want you to have a good life Scara, I want you to continue living, for the better this time. Seeing that you've started to change, I became really proud of you" your hand left his cheek.

You faced the city road where the sun shines, contrasting to the dark alley. Your body facing the path you once took before you were steered. But you look back at him.

The momentary silence between you both, it was interrupted by a faint call. A man with platinum hair, accompanied by a red streak, wearing a maple samurai outfit was walking around. He was yelling your name seeming to be looking for you.

"Y/N, love ? Where did you go?"

Scaramouche hears and it hit him. He had no choice but to accept this fate, this consequence meant for him.

You gave him a slight but genuine smile, assuring him that things would go well later on. "I have to go but.. I wish you all the best. I'm sorry and goodbye"

And thus, you left, attending to your fiance.

As for Scaramouche, he tried, smiling at the both of you with an aching chest. His gaze then focuses on the man beside you. "Take care of Y/n for me, give them all the love and time that I wasn't able to give"

Who's cutting the onions ?! Me.. Also, as much as I'd like to put 'too stunned to speak' in that one line–I had to improvise because I wanted it to be serious rather than letting you be reminded of a meme and now you would chuckle 😭

☆Taglist (as per request) : @scarasbestcvmdumpster @sumayoshi

P.s : I might make an alternate part 2, a bit more violent this time. So... Stay tuned for that !

#genshin impact #gn reader #gender neutral reader #genshin impact angst #genshin angst #scaramouche x you #scaramouche #scaramouche angst #kaedehara kazuha #scaramouche as your ex lover and kazuha as your fiancé #genshin fanfic #pain #part 2 #hurt #heartbreak #scaramouche x gender neutral reader

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wh6res · 4 years ago

Text

one more time | markhyuck

"if i'm going to teach you how to fuck her right, you’re gonna need the best seat in the house, markie!" — lhc

warnings. dubious content, swearing, bondage, voyeurism, masturbation, exhibitionism, mentions of stalking, fingering, oral (f receiving), degradation, there’s a knife (but no knifeplay), a threesome, implied kidnapping

disclaimer. i dont condone anything. this isnt a normal relationship. this aint love.

note. prolly going to hell for this but who cares. markhyuck for @nakamotocore i wuv ya ie please get better soon! TT and dom hyuck for my napaka kalat na mami @donghyukcore

against all rational thinking, haechan is getting bored from seeing the pathetic five feet distance between you and mark when he comes home. he tries to understand the other male in the relationship. truly, he does, even if he highly doubts that celibate little mark lee can pleasure you the way he can but everything's practically past that line now. donghyuck just wants to have some fun with you two, is that too much to ask for? at this point, he's blatantly ignoring the fact that you and mark don't even like each other.

but haechan cares for mark just as much as he cares about you and he won't just let his best friend miss out on all the fun things he can do to their little doll, right? what kind of a friend would he be? once haechan shoves him into a world of temptation and sin and pleasure, mark would kiss his self-induced celibacy goodbye.

plus, you've been awfully naughty these days.

talks about wanting to come home or getting at least a few rights to have gadgets were the only thing you said whenever you see him. it went as far as practically growling and running away from haechan when he tries to initiate something with you, screeching your lungs out and saying, "don't fucking touch me, you creepy little psycho!"

deflowering mark.

punishing you.

he'd be killing two birds with one stone.

he's fucked your stubborn little self into submission once, but all that overprivileged tv sessions might've put silly little ideas into your dumb little head again. alas, no worries, he'll just have to do it one more time. and maybe, now with the aid of his good 'ol buddy mark, they'll both be able to screw you up so good you'll never want to leave their clutches.

"gumdrop, can you come here for a second?"

haechan isn't deaf to the exaggerated groan you let out from the living room and it grates on his nerves how utterly brave you are for being passive aggressive. you reminded him of a little girl in a temper tantrum because they weren't given any candy - and when you show up in the master bedroom clad in your little pink dress, eyes upturned and sharp, a pathetic little girl was all he can think of when he saw you.

only now did he notice that you had even detangled your hair from the intricate braids haechan spent at least twenty minutes doing earlier this morning. where was mark all this time? why wasn’t he there to stop you? geez, you both are so going to get it, this time!

"what do you want?"

"can you give me a hug? i felt awfully stressed at work today. i need my little gumdrop."

this was obviously a test. don't get him wrong, he'll still punish you but if just this one time you learned to swallow that bitchy attitude and come crawling to him as the perfect lover should, maybe he won't be too harsh.

but he gave you too much credit, he thinks. of course his dumb cockwhore doesn't know shit. of fucking course, you wouldn't know it was a test. not when you scoffed, rolled your eyes at him, and spun in your heels to walk back to the living room.

"beat your meat with your own hands, creep."

haechan's reaction is immediate, his long legs allowing no delay in crossing the room to mercilessly fist your hair. he had pulled your hair so bad you thought it was going to rip right at the roots, all of his pent up anger due to your poor behavior channeling into that one grip.

you feel his scoff of disbelief against the curve of your neck as haechan pulls you flush against his body. "what the fuck did you just say to me?" he laughs patronizingly. "beat my meat with my own hands – aw, baby! that has got to be the best one yet!"

it truly was, though. he's not going to lie. out of every vicious snarl and hate-induced words you said to him, that particular offhand comment takes the cake. seriously, sometimes haechan thinks you're deliberately trying to make him furious – gumdrop, if you wanted to be fucked silly, all you had to do was ask.

he hurls you to the mattress, breath knocking right out of your lungs. before you can even sit back up and crawl away from haechan, he's already crawling over your body to sit directly on your stomach, fiddling with something on the headboard. you nearly scream in frustration, no matter what you do, you just can't throw him off of you!

"i don't know why the fuck you're behaving this way but it's gone too far. one more time. do i need to fuck some respect into you, one more time?”

a new wave of motivation surges through you when you hear the familiar click clacking of metal. your eyes widened just a fraction, the only thing that gave away the unease quickly seeping under your skin. if not for haechan's perceptive eyes, he would have missed it.

he merely used one hand to grip both your wrists in a vice. "no!" you squirmed, tossing and turning and trying with all your might to get him off of you. "no! i don't want that – not the cuffs!"

he loops the respective bands around your wrists with practiced ease. the last handcuffs he used had torn and marked your skin, something haechan wasn't fond of. only he can paint your bare skin with colors.

thus, he bought newer ones. the bands were a bright shade of red, connected to each other using a medium sized chain that loops around one of the steel wires of the bed, and the little bells attached to the bands ring with your every movement.

haechan knows the bells drove you crazy. its incessant ringing driving you up the wall as you couldn't keep your hands still whenever he fucked you to oblivion – he knew how much you loathed the sound of the bells, all the more reason for him to enjoy.

and mark, too. speaking of which…

you stubbornly pull at your bounded hands, glaring at the man before you as he studies your state. the corners of his lips curl up at the sight of you struggling. "you always look so good in red, gumdrop."

before you were given a chance to reply, he stormed out of the room with a sense of purpose bounding his steps. "lee donghyuck!" you screamed. "fucking come back and get me out of these, you pervert!"

he can hear you thrashing in your chains and yelling profanities from a room away. where was the demure girl he turned you into after only a week living in the apartment? though funny enough, the blood in haechan's sadistic side rushes in excitement at the prospect of wiping that glare off your face. it wasn't the fear, nor your submission that gets him off. it was the idea that he can and he will break you down no matter how many times you try to build yourself back up again.

he's not too sure whether he's going to eliminate that dirty mouth you've developed, though. because you did make him snort in the most unattractive way when you told him he can fucking jack himself off when he had been merely asking for a hug. this aggressive side you developed is… nice. he can work with it.

"can you ask your play thing to keep it down?" mark hisses, flinching and making an offkey sound with his guitar when a certain screech from you caught him off-guard.

haechan smiles.

"why don't you shut her up?"

it took a good few minutes trying to talk mark into stepping into the bedroom where he's got you chained to the headboard, but alas, haechan can be persuasive if he wants to be.

frankly, the younger man is sick and tired of hearing both of you bicker – it's no wonder you've developed a sharp tongue! it's all mark's fault and yet it's haechan that has to do the dirty work of setting you straight all over again. you're a tough cookie to crack, someone hauntingly immune to the violence and chaos.

and yet…

"you don't – don't seriously plan on doing this, do you?" your eyes go back and forth between the two males, primarily addressing the younger, devil-spawned male. haechan, ever observant, picks up the light tremor in your voice.

haechan had uttered a playful "if i'm going to teach you how to fuck her right, you're gonna need the best seat in the house, markie!" before forcing the older boy to sit by your side, mark's thighs grazing the temples of your head as your eyes awkwardly flutter up to the spectator.

mark couldn't deny he was intrigued by the emotion reflecting in your orbs. when your eyes met, it was a silent plea, he just knew it was. and unlike vulnerable and helpless you, mark, to some extent, still had at least some sense of freedom to him. he can choose to walk away, to stop haechan from trying to get him laid, maybe even talk the other boy into postponing your punishment.

but he'll do no such thing.

not because he has a moral compass (he doesn't, really) but because mark knew firsthand, there's no stopping haechan once he sets his mind into something – and right now, if that boy wants to punish you and use mark to fulfil his exhibitionistic fantasies then that's what'll happen.

your bottoms were the first to go, haechan's blunt nails digging into your skin as he pulled it down slowly, patronizingly, while watching bemused at your squirming. "this is how you know she needs a reminder," he says, addressing mark. "a good princess should take whatever's given to her like a good girl but if she's being an ungrateful brat –"

you flinch when he harshly smacks your thigh.

"– she gets what’s coming for her, right?"

there's a second's delay with mark's reply. haechan didn't mean for the question to be rhetorical, he wanted an answer from the other boy.

"right, mark?"

"r – right…"

haechan laughs, flipping the skirt of your dress up. "what, are you that excited for pussy that you're stuttering? that's cute."

you hear mark intake a sharp breath when haechan dives in to give you feathery kisses in your inner thigh. he always starts off this way, after figuring out this gets you wet way faster than simply kissing you.

as haechan starts talking, lips lazily grazing over your skin, you fight hard not to utter a single sound as you pull on your chains. "listen carefully, markie. do you hear those whimpers? she likes it," you feel the prickles of his sharp stare. "she's just too much of a fucking brat to admit it. go on gumdrop, your fighting spirit makes this all the more interesting."

you hate the patronizing tone he used as his hands trail higher, and higher until it's pinching at the bud of your clit. and against your whole being trying to keep your lips sealed, alas, it parts and creates a soft whimper that has mark stiffening next to you.

haechan lays his tongue flat against your folds. you weren't in the least bit wet yet to accommodate his size, but that's easy. he merely circles the bud with the tip of his tongue before pushing two fingers in. months of standing in the shadows outside your window had made him memorize the movement of your fingers whenever you pleasured yourself.

he felt the jolts of the bed as you shook your head side to side, trying with everything you can to hold your moans in. a corner of his lips can’t help but curl up. "what, gumdrop? too shy to lose yourself because we have an audience? don't worry our celibate little friend over here seems to like it. go on, give him a show."

too lost in the ministrations of his lips and fingers, you don't see haechan meeting eyes with mark, nodding at an object lying on the bed side table. you can only shudder when the cool tip of a knife presses against the base of your throat, hooking under the collar of your dress as mark slowly rips it off.

but haechan doesn't have the patience. "dude, give that to me. at your phase you'll get her naked tomorrow. let the tip cut her skin, the bitch deserves it anyway."

you scream when he drags it unceremoniously down your front, narrowly missed tearing at your navel. there are a few pricks of pain here and there for when the knife accidentally nicked your skin. he sure was ruthless as can be. why did you even bother acting like a brat, cursed him out, when it gave you no benefits whatsoever? did he unknowingly transform you into this sick little masochist that thrived on his sadism?

"no."

it was a defeated whisper. the last of your resolve turning into dust as the breath escapes your lungs. why did losing feel so heavy in your chest? you don't notice your arms slumping, nor your head nodding off to one side, the weight of your horrible reality sinking into you once again as if you had only been kidnapped yesterday.

but it had not been yesterday. it's been days. weeks. months. and the last time you sneakily got ahold of mark's phone and searched for your name, the last news clip or article published about your disappearance had been three months ago. that only meant one thing.

they weren't looking for you anymore.

just like that the world continued, other people's lives continued. all the while you're stuck here, rotting in the arms of your captors.

haechan's face emerged in front of you. he smiles and you would've believed he felt an ounce of guilt if not for that wicked stare in his eyes. "you've always been most beautiful like this, gumdrop. the hope disappearing in your eyes upon the realization that no one's coming for you anymore – i love it. i love you, my pretty girl."

he placed a chaste kiss on your forehead but he might as well have shot you straight in the heart.

there was no warning, nothing to ready you for the sudden intrusion happening on your bottom half and it was so bad, that it made you shut your eyes, hands wrapping around the chains as tears started falling across your cheeks.

rough fingers reached out and wiped them away.

something felt off.

the fingers were too calloused, opposed to the softness of haechan's nimble fingers. and while the aforementioned male had more length than girth, the person who's thrusting himself inside you is the complete opposite. he's stretching you out too much, not even bothering to give you time to adjust when he's already bucking his hips like an animal.

"shh, it's okay. i'll take care of you…"

this wasn't haechan.

and when you fluttered your eyes open to see mark's boyish little face, you can't help that look of betrayal painting your features. at least you only had to deal with one obsessive, sex-deprived freak. now, you're not so sure if you can handle both of them.

how foolish of you to think that mark's self-induced celibacy stretched far and wide when in reality, he was also just a boy with his own needs. a slave to his own temptations.

how cruel. so, so cruel.

in the back of your mind, you were thankful haechan cared enough to properly get you in the mood or else you would've been staining the bed sheets red by how deep and frantic mark’s thrusts were. it felt like he wanted to tear you in half.

"if i didn't know better i'd say you're experienced, markie! i wouldn't fucking know you're a virgin by how much you're humping her like a dog.”

curse him and his dirty mouth. his constant degradation is making it easier for mark to slide in and out of you, and a proof for that is the lewd slick sounds echoing in the room partnered with the older male's deep grunts – a complete opposite of the pitched, whiny sounds haechan makes.

'gumdrop, come on! be noisy with our first-timer here just how you're always noisy with me, yeah? don't be such a killjoy." the pout in his voice is evident, coming from the side of your ear.

you wish you had never turned your head, otherwise you wouldn't have to see him pumping his own dick in his hands right in front of you. the glare you shot probably looked pathetic, what with all the tears streaming down your face and your little theory proves true when you see his mouth quirk up to the side.

"i fucking hate you."

"mark, fuck her harder, wouldja? until she learns her fucking lesson."

the disturbed stare you gave him does not slip his notice, his hand's pace turning erratic, spurred by the slick sound of your walls, skin clapping, and mark's broken whines.

make him stop, your eyes said. please.

but haechan only shoots you an innocent smile before shaking his head. "didn't you tell me to beat my meat with my own hands?"

taglist !!

@hoeartchoke @donghyukcore @stopknot @greenish-taro @stayvision @zhongriot @lmaoskz @zephyr-abyss @anonymous-stuff @josuke8 @jaemotel @gothboyjisung

wanna be added to my general taglist? click here!

#yandere nct #yandere kpop #yandere nct 127 #yandere haechan #yandere mark #nct imagines #mark imagines #haechan imagines #nct scenarios #markhyuck scenarios #mark scenarios #nct smut #haechan smut #mark smut #nct oneshots #markhyuck oneshots #markhyuck imagines

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secretbangtnn · 4 years ago

Text

Best Of Me| Two

Pairings : →ot7 x reader, poly!BTS x reader

Genre : → vampireau, yandere!au, age gap, gore, obsessive behavior, ddlg/caregiver, poly, fantasy, supernaturals

summary : It’s quite unusual to find a little baby on your doorstep, especially that their area was not of the poorest - you could say that a vampire town was efficient with money and snobby creatures. However over time the first idea of just giving back the little girl seems more and more radical and those moody vampires slowly start perceiving deeper feelings to human they even wanted to kill.

previous | next

notes ~ I did it!!! Omg im so happy I finished it, hopefully the next one are going to come sooner. The first chapters are going to be with a baby oc - im sorry if its boring, but after it we can start with the real plot, the things are gonna get dark. Hope that you will like it, and remeber to give me some feedback - im whore for a comments and ask and beside they motivate me very much

taglist :

@missseoulite @gukkculture @silscintilla @the-falling-star @apollonshootafar @mwitsmejk @lovinggalaxies @b-e-t-x-s-o @jisoosbitch @ariverflowsonthemoon @maboiisuga @peachescream1723 @sichajeon

Cries everywhere. Sobbing so loud that all the birds disappeared from their little birdhouse outside the window. And as funny the view was, a big ball of stress and nerves started collecting itself in the rather calm manor. Reason of all this mess was just one, so easy to notice.

“Jungkook!” Just like a ball of nerves now the big ball of dirty blankets and clothes hit the young vampire, making him stumble a little. Obvious disgust on his face with a piece of distaste on his tongue which just a second ago had been caused by the same thing he now fisted in his hands.

“You didn’t have to throw it at me!” Barked Jungkook staring at the broad shoulders of his oldest brother. Child now a little calmer, however still sobbing slightly, keeping the atmosphere at bay.

“You have brung the kid so you will hold the things he made. Be happy that I'm not forcing you to change the diaper instead.”

Disgust on all of their faces is now being something normal, having kids in the same room as them, definitely does not go well with hundred years old vampires. The only one without a gag reflex seems to be Seokjin, acting like a pro mother, just after her 3rd pregnancy with the next on the road. However all of them agreed with the statement that it was all but Jungkook's fault, which came with consequences for said boy.

Thus now sitting on the couch, five of the ramaing vampires, looked with a bored expression at the panicked and nearly vomiting jungkook. Youngest of them always had a soft stomach, never being the one to clean after disasters, forcing people to basically clean after him, and maybe that's why all of them felt such a satisfaction upon them while staring at the shitty situation.

Literally shitty.

Stumbling a little from the intense smell, Jungkook started to try getting rid of the used diaper in his hands, holding it with his fingers dingling it as far from his face as he could. Maybe the smelly object was not the only thing that should be named like a feces, knowing that a person who should just throw the diaper away, purposefully walked closer than intended to a couch with older vampires, stumbling not that accidentally and making the thing in his hand fly straight to a lap of a reading Namjoon.

A moment of silence, only lasting for a short second. Namjoon was never the one to shout or get mad, rather prefering to act calm and well put together, believing in a peace making and solutions not requiring usage of violence but when the heavy baggage on his lap suddenly started to warm his lap, he completely crushed his persona as well as book in his hands.

“Ups...hehe.” Jungkook laughed awkwardly, knowing well his fate. Doe eyes looked at the tall man, standing a little farther than him, just behind the couch. Jaw tightened so were the hands, keeping the last strings of calmness that were floating on very dangerous water.

“Listen, before you actually do something think of the time when you destroyed my ps4 and

I did not even complain.” Hands just before him similar to the way you would to with a wild animal, and in Jungkook's opinion, it was not that far from the truth, observing how Namjoons jaws nearly crushed from the tension.

“Okay okay, we all need to calm down, It was just an accident.” Cut in red head, standing in the middle of the war zone. It was stupid idea, definetly not the brightes of the sunny vampire, even if it came from the good intentions. Hoseok, just like an innocent child that got stuck in a big people argument, was the one that got hurt in the end.

And everybody knew that when Hoseok gets mad it's the extremity that anyone in this room is scared to experience once again. There is silent agreement between the rest of the brothers that was made after one of Hoseok's outburst, promising that no matter what the devil can’t come out.

The apple of discord laying now upon redhead’s feet, innocent like a little kitten that just waits to be petted, but in this case it wasn neither a fluffy ball of fur and definitely not something that should be touched.

Silence so loud, banging in their ears with an uneven breath. Second after second, rest that were not included in the middle, counted sitting on their heels with nerve wracking feelings.They stared as Hoseok’s shoulders rose and went down with each puff of air from his flared nostrils, neither of them dared to move, preferring to stay in a safe zone.

Just as red headed one wanted to take his first kill, a loud laugh echoed in a room, coming from a little child in Seokjin's arms, that probably just came back from being cleaned up. A fresh smile on its face, eyes sparkly looking straight at the scene.

“What are you doing, idiots?” Asked Seokjin, a visible vein on his forehead, sticking out under his free hand that now pinched a bridge of his nose. His eyes catching a glimpse of the used diaper, right on his favorite carpet. “You had one thing to do, one thing Jungkook.”

“It was an accident I swear on my ps4!” He tried explaining, shaking his arms. Seokjin saw to much lived too long to believe it, everybody knew it but even than they acted like bunch of idiots when something like this happen.

“Namjoon destroyed it, you said it yourself.” Spoke Jimin, sitting on a couch with a happy smile, pleased with himself. Younger's head immediately halted in his way, a look of betrayal on his face.

“You midge…”

“I don’t care, just clean it up, in the meantime me with the little snack are going to cook something, right my little cutie?” Cuted the older while caressing the child in his arms, turning his voice in a baby one. And just like this the scene came to the same point, the only difference was that neither Namjoon or Hoseok were in the room, probably running away as fast as Sekojins came.

Jungkook sighed, squatting down to take care of the said thing. Again the disgust and a feeling of nausea hitted him with a side giggles of his blonde haired brother.

Going into the kitchen he spotted the child that looked at him as soon as he appeared. Little smile and sweet laugh, making him soft and mushy for a while.

“I hope you know that you gave us a big problem with bringing a human child there.” Seokjin spoke, not looking from a cutting board, himself to immersed in said action

Jungkook knew, earlier thinking of it like a mere action, something that they can get rid of as fast as a lollipop wrapper. But it was not, and now looking at the kid, he realized how his careless behaviour could weigh down not only on his family but the whole society of vampires.

“I’m-”

“Don’t just apologize, we need to take care of it as fast as we can, in the meantime doing everything to not harm it. If someone finds out it’s going to be a bigger problem, probably even straining the relationship with human - and that’s something we do not want.” Cuted older, in the end turning around pointing the sharp knife on Jungkook.

It was true, the delicate stattlement between those two societies is still new, fresh and hot, ready to burn anyone's fingers, anyones who is to carless. The today is a better world, something that all of the brothers know, remembering dark times - some of them being not older than mere hatchling then. World was a dangerous place to live in, vampires hunting humans, humans hunting vampires, a competition that never got settled, and they hope it never will.

“Try feeding it and come to the living room after you are done. We will discuss the next actions - good luck.” A little wink at the end, Seokjin wiped his hands off on the way patting the younger's back, harder than normally.

“Wait what?! You are not being serious right now, right?” Asked confused Jungkook, fastly turning around to an already disappearing figure. Cold sweat on his body as he looked at the smooth face of the older, that defended a flying kiss to his shocked self. “Why can’t you do it?”

“I can. But the human seems to take a liking to you.” And how absurd it sounded, the baby really looked at Jungkook like some god, sparkly eyes always following his bigger figure.

“Seokjin! Don’t leave me please, I can’t do it.”He whined, looking for the said man, to his luck he was nowhere to be found. It was going to be alright - he tried to believe in those words now clutching baby spoon, that he was sure they did not have, and a mashed food, looking more like dog food than actual meal.

His Eyes staring right into the sparkly and to obnoxious happy, making him even more irritated. In the end, Jungkook hated little children, being and acting like one himself

Little hands stretching towards him with a toothless smile on the side, getting bigger as Jungkook came closer. That was it, taking a big breath he come to the other side of the table - almost touching the stool where the human sat. Ready and determined to get the task done, treating it similar to a quest in the game, he took the little spoon with some of the smashed food, and started to get closer to the child's mouth.

And as the brothers again started to live their normal life, thinking that at least for now, everything is settled, a very obvious squeal shook the while house.

“HYUNG!...IT WANTS TO TOUCH ME! GET IT AWAY, GET IT AWAY!”

___

All of them now sitting on the couches and armchairs, taking nearly all of the space. Some of the observing the crawling baby with prominent couriousty some of them with disgust even fear, not knowing what future the baby will bring.

Namjoon although feeling the little distaste, knew or better had a plan with what to do.

Smile on his lips not reaching his eyes, however stumbling on the way of eye contact with some of his brothers.

“Okay so, definitely we need to do something with...this.” Said Jimin, look on his face full of distress and disgust resting on the child, that as if it knew of Jimin’s attention looked back full of giggles and reaching hands.

“That is obvious, we can’t keep human child.” Barked Yoongi, the one which rather prefered to stay quiet in those metters.

“Jungkook should take care of it, It’s not my fault he is to stupid to not question a left human on a doorstep.” Smug smile now on Jimin's face, as he gave the side glance to the said male, happy with triggering the younger temper.

“As If you woul…”

“Okay we get it Jimin, it was Jungkook's fault, but still it can affect us all, so try to be at least a little bit helpful or shut up” Interrupted Seokjin staring at both of them in turn. The oldest obviously tired of all of the drama, massaging his scalp, to relieve the tension a little. “Let's start one by one, any ideas?”

Silence, a loud silence throwing the tension to the already burning fire. Seokjin's vein once again appeared on his forehead, making Jungkook nearly knock from a terrifying sight of it. It was pulsating, green and bumpy.

“Maybe let’s put it back?” Asked the quiet voice, Sekojin ready to snap at the stupid idea thinking that some of the youngers don’t know limit of the unfunny jokes, only to find innocent eyes of Hoseok.

“That’s … well that is AN option, thank you Hoseok - keep it up. Any other ideas?” Seokjin’s hands molded into a thump, giving the tired smile to Hoseok, knowing of his still busing nerves.

“Why are we even trying so hard, throw it away i say.” Jimin mumbled while staring at the little child going his way, quickly putting his feet on the couch, scared of a chance of being touched by the human.

Tired sight left mouth of the olders, his vein fading a little - to Jungkook luck, and his hands now clenching his blonde lock. He was helpless, disappointed in his brother's ideas and intelligence. He was sure that, that was indeed an end, his family will be arrested for keeping human, and vampires are going to lose a peace they fighted for.

Everything because Jungkook wanted to take unfamiliar child to their house.

“What about the orphanage that opened like one month ago, can’t we just leave it there?” Cuted Namjoon, making everyone snap their head. Seokjin nearly crying, wanting to kiss his brother as much as choke him for his slow process of thinking.

“Couldn’t you say earlier?!

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astaroth1357 · 4 years ago

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Hi there, congrats for the 1500 subs. How about the bros reaction to an MC who's an empath?

Brothers with an MC Who is an Empath

This should not have been as hard as it was but maaan, my brain just wasn’t working. Finally got it done though!

Intro:

An Empath is essentially someone who is highly sensitive to outside stimuli like sounds, personalities, energies, emotions, or just hectic/chaotic environments. They tend to absorb the emotions of others into themselves because of this. Though their sensitivity can grant deeper understanding for others, it comes at the price of the Empath’s own emotional and physical health if not given enough time to decompress which can lead to feeling drained, irritable, depressed, or overwhelmed.

Lucifer

Oh boy, if there was ever any demon not in tune to his own emotions…

He started out legitimately not knowing what an "empath" was and frankly he didn't care to know. His main concern was just keeping the MC alive.

Though that didn't seem to be too hard because they apparently get tired quickly… or at least they had to take extended periods away from most of his brothers.

He wasn't sure why, he first assumed it was because they found his brothers annoying but that didn't seem to be the case either...

He'd see them grinning with Mammon after a jackpot, relaxing with Satan in silence, and even crying with Levi over things so niche and pointless he couldn’t imagine that they actually cared...

It wasn’t too long until they set their sights on him.

They always seemed to know when he was stressed or when he needed to talk to someone. He'd even be embarrassed to admit there were days when he’d just hover somewhat close to them, face more or less slathered with "I really need to talk right now" but too proud to make the first move.

After some time, he decided to look up what an empath was again and it all clicked into place. They probably knew when he was tired because they could just sense it off of him.

And who knows how exhausting that must be for them...

After that little revelation he actually started paying more attention to his own health to keep it from spilling over to them, but he would still go to them to talk from time to time. He honestly never expected a human to become his closest confidant.

Mammon

Mammon has BIG energy. He’s one of those personalities that just brightens a room he walks in but damn… if he’s not a little exhausting to be around sometimes…

Truthfully, he was kind of into their whole “I know how you feel so you don’t have to say it” vibe though it was really confusing to start with...

On the one hand, they never made fun of him for his sensitive side. Not once. And they seemed pick up on the days where he wasn't feeling his best as well, which only made him happy and want spend more time with them.

But on the other hand, he'd be lying if he said that their need to recharge away from him didn't catch him off guard a lot... Hell, for the first few weeks of getting to know the MC he thought they didn't like him at all!

It took the MC sitting him down and explaining to him that they're more sensitive to things like lights, sounds, and emotions for him to kind of get the picture. It wasn’t that they didn’t like him, they just needed to be somewhere calm.

Cue a lot of “Okay human, I’ll be calm. Promise! Ya won’t even now I’m here!” in a well meaning, but pretty loud voice and not getting much better from there, bless his heart...

Even after he eventually gets the picture and stops hanging off of their leg, it does bum him out to be separated for however long it takes for them to get better (at worst, it can be days).

But he really gets excited like a puppy whenever they finally come back again! Big grins and lots of hugs (good luck peeling him off now).

Levi

Levi is... best taken in short bursts.

Though his personality isn’t big like Mammon’s, he does have a lot of lingering negativity around him. Not exactly his fault, being Envy and all, but not great for someone who’s sensitive to emotions.

In truth, Levi genuinely loves being around the MC because they “get” him even if they don’t get what’s happening.

While his brothers may roll their eyes or struggle to understand how he can put so much emotional investment into an anime or a character, the MC would always seem to feel and respect that his emotions were genuine and let him experience them without question.

… But at the same time, that sensitivity meant that they got carried in with him through his every emotion, good, bad, or somewhat erratic depending on the situation…

Add to that his higher than usual need for validation, investment, and feedback due to his insecurity and unfortunately he’s easily the most emotionally draining person in the House...

It took some time to explain to Levi what an empath was and that their desired space wasn’t because there was something wrong with him or anything, they just needed breaks. Thankfully, being an introvert himself meant that Levi understood this a lot quicker than Mammon.

In truth, being with Levi could be fun and rewarding for both parties. During his high points, his happiness truly does shine like no other, just… don’t overdo it.

Satan

In the beginning, Satan was honestly pretty impressed how quickly the exchange student saw through his fake smiles. They’d know that there was no actual joy behind them and thus avoided him for the most part.

This was before they formed their pact so he was perfectly fine with that. Let them hide, that’s the smart idea.

But after getting to know them and going through the body-switch, he started to see that it was deeper than just some good intuition on their part. Something about them… reflected the people around them...

They appeared to be acutely aware of the emotion in a given person or a given room and reacted like they were soaking in the atmosphere they found themselves in. Taking it into themselves…

It truly confused him.

Satan is the picture of emotional control, it’s been taught to him again and again to always keep a good handle on himself because things go flying when he doesn’t. The idea of being so open to others just didn’t make much sense to him…

Why would anyone want to live so dependent on the emotions of others? It sounded chaotic just to hear about it...

But after he opened up to them about his own inner doubts he started to think it wasn’t such a bad thing. They appeared to be equipped to help him navigate his own emotions, especially the new ones he didn’t have the best grasp on yet.

He later did his own research into human emotions, discovered empaths, and that put it all into perspective. Like Lucifer, he did his best not to overwhelm them after that but there was little worry about that anyway. Satan is, again, emotional control at its finest.

Asmodeus

Oh, Asmo picked up on their human’s little quirk relatively quickly compared to his brothers. Being emotionally observant is just part of what makes him so good at what he does.

Honestly, he enjoyed just watching them from afar… Watching the way their eyes lit up when talking to a cheerful Simeon or how huffy and frustrated they’d get along with Mammon when things weren’t going his way. It was cute to him, like a child playing “Pretend.”

Eventually, though, he started to notice that it went a lot deeper than mere imitation...

One day, Levi came home distraught about the tragic death of some voice actor he fancied and the MC was right along with him, crying as if that loss was theirs...

On another, Satan had spent the whole day silently fuming and the MC was a complete wreck, tense and on-edge for no other reason than the feeling of aggression in the air…

And crowds… crowded rooms seemed to be the death of them. So much noise and constant input, they’d have to leave so quickly…

Asmo saw all these things himself, without having to be told, and he became a refuge for them when things became too much. He has a big personality himself, but he could tone it down for a time and offer them a place away for a while.

If school, parties, or the brothers themselves just became too much, the MC could always go to Asmo’s room to vent like they let everybody else to with them. He’d keep the place quiet and calm and just help them sort things out...

Thank their father for Asmo’s observance.

Beelzebub

Legit the calmest, sweetest, nicest person to be around. Truly the best companion for an empathic MC to have.

Beel’s personality is positive, sweet, and (most importantly) stable. He’s not too bombastic nor too withdrawn, he’s not riddled with hidden stress or self-loathing, and he’s not even manipulative in any way, he’s just… Beel.

Am I saying that Beel is the MC’s emotional support demon? Yes. Yes I am.

Being around Beel is like hooking them up to a walking battery recharging station. Something about him just exudes warmth and comfort… They could be wrapped up in his arms for days and never say a word yet still be perfectly content...

Beel doesn't really mind them coming to him when distressed either because he likes being able to help them when they’re feeling drained. It makes him feel kind of special, they don’t seem to go to anyone else in quite the same way.

Usually, one of his brothers will be in a bad mood and the human will flock to Beel like a protective barrier. They'll hug him or trail along behind him like a lost puppy, which he thinks is very cute.

If they’re feeling really out of it, he’d carry them around on his back while they rest like he does for Belphie sometimes. Any time his brothers try to get too close to them or look like they’re going to bother them, he’ll just carry them away to some place quieter.

Though, the MC did pick up the deep sadness he felt for Lilith and Belphie (while he was gone) from time to time.... Which, considering how kind and comforting he usually is, just makes that dip in mood all the more painful and distressing for them. Poor baby…

Belphegor

Belphie is another calm personality to have around, kind of similar to Beel, but since he's more prone to sadness and irritability he doesn't make the best companion…

If Beel is comfort, then Belphie is repose. Relaxed and peaceful, but also languid and sluggish… When Beel isn't around, then he makes a decent second, but only on good days.

Belphie has a mixed opinion on their uncanny ability to pick up on his feelings… He tries his best to be “mysterious” so having someone who can read him like a book gets under his skin just a little…

But he also really likes how much it helps them get to know him and understand where he’s coming from (being the youngest, he isn’t as used to being heard by anybody other than Beel). So, he’s very conflicted…

It didn’t help at all when it came to light that the MC could legitimately tell that he felt very hostile and angry towards them while he was still in the attic. When he asked why they helped him anyway, they told him so that they could make Beel happy again, regardless of how he felt about them which... ouch...

As if he could feel any worse about that particular incident… They could feel how guilty he was about that… right?

Even if they can’t he makes sure that they know that he’s sorry and he won’t do it again. Probably the lil’shit.

#obey me #obey me shall we date #shall-we-date-obey-me #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me leviathan #obey me satan #obey me asmodeus #obey me beelzebub #obey me belphegor #obey me headcanons #obey me scenarios

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robininthelabyrinth · 4 years ago

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This one's gonna take two asks, I'm incapable of making it more succinct. In Accurate description NHS said "I’m taking you back with me to the Nie sect when all this is over. If your parents want you back, they can come ask nicely.” Could we get that AU? And the Jiangs HAVE to ask nicely, because with the war on the horizon they can't risk alienating the Nies, but they are so bad at it? NHS's half assed plan to poach JC gets more and more solid the longer he has to watch this train wreck.(1/2)

How hard can it be to love your own flesh and blood? Even NMJ has stopped admonishing him for wanting to poach another sect's heir. What a political nightmare that would be. But JC is so relaxed with NHS's birds? And keeping up longer and longer when training with da-ge? And smiling more? And JYL said, she's never seen him so loose in the shoulders? NHS can make this work. JFM and YZY never valued JC anyway

Part 2 of Accurate Description (necessary to read that first)

“Absolutely not,” was the first thing Nie Huaisang’s brother said when Nie Huaisang first raised the idea of kidnapping Jiang Cheng for his own good. “Absolutely fucking not.”

“Nie sect principle three,” Nie Huaisang said.

“Well, shit,” his brother said.

This was because Nie Huaisang’s brother is the best.

“I’ve gotten other people involved in this,” Nie Huaisang added helpfully.

“You’d better have,” his brother said. “I am not dealing with the fallout from this on my own.”

Nie Huaisang nodded happily. That was about what he’d expected.

A few moments later, his brother asked, “Why are we kidnapping him, anyway?”

“This is temporary,” Nie Mingjue said gruffly.

“Very temporary,” Jiang Cheng agreed, sounding stiff and awkward. “I don’t even know why I’m here.”

“You know exactly why you’re here,” Nie Huaisang objected. “I told you why!”

Jiang Cheng gave him a dirty look.

“Also I have no idea how da-ge got you here, but you’re staying,” Nie Huaisang said firmly. “For as long as it takes for your parents to show that they deserve you returning to them. You’re not getting a choice.”

Jiang Cheng’s face was turning red.

“That’s not the deal, Huaisang,” Nie Mingjue interjected. “Jiang Wanyin can return home at any time he wishes.”

Nie Huaisang glared, but his brother ignored him.

“He can also stay as long as he wishes,” he said, and this time it was Jiang Cheng’s turn to stare. “If you want others to respect him, you must first pay him the respect he deserves yourself. Now, I have to go, but Jiang Wanyin – know that our home is always open to you.”

He put a hand on his shoulder and squeezed it, then ruffled Nie Huaisang’s hair, and left.

Jiang Cheng looked dazed.

Nie Huaisang smirked.

“…you said something about him giving out hugs?”

“Oh yeah,” Nie Huaisang said. “Great hugs.”

“I can’t believe you would betray me like this,” Nie Huaisang whined. “And after all I’ve done for you!”

“A little training’s not going to kill you,” Jiang Cheng said. “Come on already.”

“My brother put you up to this, didn’t he? You sold me out for a hug.”

“I sold you out for the opportunity to go on a proper night-hunt,” Jiang Cheng said. “Also, he said he was proud of the progress I’ve been making on my cultivation and sword training since I got here. And gave me a hug.”

Nie Huaisang grumbled but conceded that his brother was especially difficult to resist when he was in full big brother mode. If he wasn’t, Nie Huaisang wouldn’t have been nearly so willing to give up the neat new sword he’d found in the Xuanwu’s cave and store it down in their saber halls until his brother and Baxia could figure out how to suppress it - he hadn’t even realized it was full of resentful energy at first, and he still thought it was especially aesthetic.

“Besides, if you don’t practice something soon, he’ll come after you himself,” Jiang Cheng said. “Wouldn’t you rather train with me?”

“No. You’re just as crazy as he is.”

Jiang Cheng looked disturbingly complimented.

“I’ll come look at your birds later,” he offered.

“You’d do that anyway,” Nie Huaisang said. “You love my birds.”

Jiang Cheng did, too. Nearly as much as he loved all the feral cats that roamed the walls of the Unclean Realm, every single one of which seemed to have immediately pegged him as a soft touch and come nosing around for treats – Nie Huaisang had never seen Jiang Cheng look so calm and peaceful as when he had a cat under his palm.

It really put into perspective how stressed he looked the rest of the time.

“Oh, all right,” he groaned, and Jiang Cheng beamed. “Just know that I hate you.”

“Same to you, Nie-gongzi,” Jiang Cheng said, completely insincere. “Same to you.”

“You know, I’m surprised my parents haven’t shown up to demand me back yet,” Jiang Cheng said over lunch one day. “It’s not – it’s not a problem. It’s only – I thought – Mother at least –”

“Oh, they’re demanding all right,” Nie Huaisang sniggered.

“…Nie Huaisang, what have you done,” Jiang Cheng said.

“Conspired, that’s what,” Nie Mingjue said. “I don’t know if I should thank you for discovering my brother’s sole talent, namely for scheming and conspiracies, or to blame you for it, Wanyin – but you do have very loyal friends.”

Jiang Cheng blinked.

“Well, first your parents went to Lanling,” Nie Huaisang explained. “On account of Jin Zixuan and Mianmian very obviously sneaking food around and buying all sorts of things that you would like before smuggling them – very poorly and obviously, mind you – into Jinlin Tower, and of course they were also overheard talking about something that sounded an awful lot like ‘Wanyin’; everyone assumed they were hiding you. Turns out they weren’t, of course; it was just a stray dog they’d named something with similar tones. Not their fault everyone got the wrong idea!”

Jiang Cheng’s eye twitched.

“And then, of course, they went to Gusu, on account of Lan Wangji telling everyone you were his sworn brother –”

“His what?!”

“Well, close enough. On account of how you saved his life.”

“I did not!”

“I thought I heard something about how you carried him on your back as you fled from the Xuanwu’s cave and the Wen sect’s ambushes, when he was exhausted and could not walk,” Nie Mingjue said mildly, and Jiang Cheng spluttered. “Had I heard wrongly?”

“…well, no…but...”

“Of course, you weren’t at Gusu,” Nie Huaisang continued, ignoring them both. “Though there were some heavy implications for a little while that you’d gone off with Lan-gongzi –”

“Isn’t he missing?”

Nie Mingjue coughed and looked down at his plate.

“And none of you said anything?” Jiang Cheng asked, looking between them. “At any point? Did you just, what, not talk to them?”

“I have spoken with your parents several times since they have started looking for you,” Nie Mingjue said, and his voice was suddenly hot with roiling anger. “I have concluded that Huaisang had a point regarding the necessity of their learning how to ask for your return.”

Jiang Cheng blinked.

“Your parents are jerks,” Nie Huaisang volunteered. “And you deserve better.”

“Yes, thank you,” Jiang Cheng said, a little strangled. “I think I – got that.”

“Good.”

“It’s just, my jiejie –”

“Supports you being here. She sent you a care package. It’s in your room.”

“…Wei Wuxian –”

“Sent a note along with the package. Says to keep up the good work.”

“How did you even get something like that?!”

“I have my ways.”

Nie Huaisang was staring blankly at the wall when Jiang Cheng walked in and did a double take.

“Okay,” he said to Nie Mingjue, sitting patiently nearby with a letter in his hands. “You broke him. How?”

“He just discovered that he inadvertently saved a great deal of lives,” Nie Mingjue said. “As did you, by agreeing to come here.”

“I only agreed to come here because you lied and told me it was necessary to help defend my sect,” Jiang Cheng grumbled, clearly not meaning it.

Nie Huaisang let out a high-pitched and somewhat hysterical giggle.

“It was,” Nie MIngjue said solemnly, offering him the letter. “It appears that Wen Chao was given permission to attack and crush the Jiang sect, but has been delaying in anticipation of your return on account of wanting to deal with all of you at once. The delay allowed our spies time to discover his plans, and to carry warnings to your parents. They were thus able to fortify the Lotus Pier’s defenses against invasion, and to hold it off until aid could arrive – which they wouldn’t have managed if he’d attacked at once, as he would have if you’d been there.”

Jiang Cheng stared.

“Would you like to sit down and stare at the wall?” Nie Mingjue offered kindly.

“…yes please.”

“How’d you convince him to let me come here, anyway?” Jiang Cheng asked Nie Huaisang as he packed up his things. He was finally heading back to the Lotus Pier, albeit only long enough to collect soldiers and come back to join what they’d started calling the Sunshot Campaign – his parents had finally figured out where he was and sent word that had, in the view of the Nie, just barely qualified as sufficient to get some leeway.

Lan Wangji was waiting in the hallway to escort him there, and he’d sworn to Nie Huaisang that he would not allow either of Jiang Cheng’s parents to say anything untoward while they were there. He’d looked very serious while he said it, too, which pleased Nie Huaisang to no end and made Jiang Cheng look more than a bit nervous.

“You’re only asking that now?” Nie Huaisang asked, amused.

Jiang Cheng shrugged. “You going to tell me or not?”

“It was easy,” he said. “I just invoked Nie sect principle three.”

“…what’s that?”

“‘A fire burns all the same’,” Nie Huaisang said. “Variously interpreted as: ‘Treat your neighbor’s harm as your own’, ‘Do not stand idly by as your neighbor bleeds’, or ‘Indifference to evil is equivalent to evil’.”

Jiang Cheng stared.

“How about ‘if you see someone who needs you, you have an obligation to act’?”

Jiang Cheng blinked. “Okay,” he said. “And?”

“And what?”

“And what else did you say? You convinced him to literally kidnap the heir of another Great Sect; I can’t believe that you accomplished that simply by saying ‘hey principle three applies here, let’s do this’.”

“Maybe I did,” Nie Huaisang sniffed.

Jiang Cheng rolled his eyes. “Fine, keep your secrets. I’ll get them out of you one day.”

“Maybe you will,” Nie Huaisang said.

“Da-ge,” Nie Huaisang said. “If I wanted to keep Jiang Cheng permanently, what principle would I have to invoke for that?”

“Nineteen.”

“Nineteen?” Nie Huaisang frowned. “But, da-ge, principle nineteen is the one about marriage – oooooooh.”

#mdzs #nie huaisang #jiang cheng #nie mingjue #my fic #my fics #accurate description #wolveshowlatnight

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loveelle · 4 years ago

Text

Leap of Faith~ Part 10

Luke Patterson x Reggie’s sister!Reader

A/N: Thus wraps up the series! Thank you for all the support and love you’ve given me throughout this, you couldn’t have been a better audience! Please let me know what your thoughts and feel free to drop on by and read some of my other fics if you haven’t. I’m planning a Reggie series that hopefully will be good, ummmm yeah! I can’t say it will be cause i haven’t written yet, but we’ll see! Thank you again for everything and I hope y’all like the ending? Maybe? :)

WC: 5.5K

SERIES MASTER

MASTER

---

“No music is worth making if we’re not making it with you two.” You closed your eyes, letting the feeling of being this close to Luke linger in your mind before you opened your eyes and locked on with his. “No regrets.” He whispered and you nodded, slowly pulling yourself from his grip. Luke grew confused, reaching forward to hold you again.

“Then I’m sorry for what I’m about to do.” Your eyes moved about the three boys and Julie before you were gone.

“Y/N!” Your brother yelled out at your absence, hoping by any chance you didn’t truly leave them before saying goodbye. “Y/N!”

“Reggie.” Alex mumbled out his name, holding his stomach in pain and Reggie’s already tear-filled eyes snapped to his and the tears started falling.

“Where’d she go?” His voice cracked. “She just left- Where’d she go?” No one provided him with an answer. “Luke?”

“I don’t know.” Luke’s eyes hadn’t moved from the very last spot he was able to look into yours, his own tears now springing free.

“Do you think she’s coming back?” Reggie asked despite knowing you wouldn’t. He couldn’t help but hope you would. He was dying and he needed to say goodbye to you. Earlier, he thought he could just leave and you’d never know the difference, but now, he needed to say goodbye to you.

Another round of jolts hit the three ghost boys.

“You’ve got to go!” Julie cried out. She thought she couldn’t handle seeing the boys in such pain with you by her side, but now that you were gone, she had no one to help convince them. The boys laid on the floor, none of them knowing if they were in too much pain to stand or just gave up trying. Julie fell to her knees next to them. “Please, just go to Caleb.”

“I never told Y/N how I felt.” Luke’s eyes were closed as he wiped away the tears quickly, his mind focused solely on you. No regrets, he told you. Well, now he had one. He had no clue where you were or what you were doing and he just wanted you here with him. He wanted to say goodbye. He wanted Reggie to say goodbye, and Alex. He wanted to know that with whatever happened to them, you knew the truth.

Luke’s thoughts of you were interrupted by a feeling inside him. It was much different than the jolts. Instead of bringing them pain and agony, this feeling was nothing but relief and for the first time since Luke was on stage, he felt like he could breathe again.

“What’s happening?” Reggie whispered as Luke opened his eyes, seeing himself as well as his friends glowing. Everyone was silent, tears still falling as they held their breaths.

“I feel stronger.” Luke rose off the floor, looking down at himself as Reggie and Alex stood up with him.

“I don’t feel as weak anymore.” Reggie glanced between his friends with a skip of relief in his voice.

“Me neither.” Alex smiled briefly. “Not that, you know, I was ever weak.” He earned a chuckle out of his friends.

Julie watched on in disbelief. One second ago, they were all dying, and now, out of nowhere, they were strong again. The boys felt the change in their wrists all at once as they held up their arms and pushed their sleeves out of the way, except for Luke. They let out small gasps as the stamp that has caused them so much pain and suffering emitted a light before slowly lifting from their skin into the air. With no information on what was happening, the four of them watched as the stamp fizzled into nothing, right along with Caleb’s control over them.

“What do you think that means?” Julie broke the silence before the boys laughed happily, looking amongst themselves before Julie.

“I think the band’s back.” Luke told her and out of pure happiness, Julie jumped into their arms. Her arms pulled Alex and Reggie into the hug as her body met Luke. The boys didn’t hesitate to hug back, not catching onto the plain and obvious fact that Julie was touching them.

Julie caught on, however. She pulled away, looking at how her hands rested on Reggie and Alex’s shoulders to bring them close. “How can I touch you?” She gasped out, testing to make sure she could feel them under her hands.

“I don’t know.”

“Maybe we could try that hug thing again?” Alex asked rather blushingly, a way to celebrate not being completely dead from the universe. The other three obliged and dove into another hug full of laughs and smiles until Luke pulled away slowly, breaking the other’s hold on him.

“Luke?” Julie asked after seeing his face fall. “What’s wrong?”

He looked at her before his eyes moved to Reggie. “‘I’m sorry for what I’m about to do.’” He said and the boy furrowed his brows, not catching onto what Luke was talking about. Luke let out an exasperated sigh. “It’s what Y/N said to me before she left.”

“You think my sister had something to do with this?” Luke stayed silent, but Reggie knew what he was thinking. “No. No, she wouldn’t do that.”

“Reggie-“

“No!” He denied again, turning around to face away from the boys and Julie. As he did so, his eyes landed on your jacket once again that you’d taken off in exchange for your new one, draped across the back of the couch. He shook his head and felt tears cloud his eyes again.

“Maybe it wasn’t her.” Alex moved to Reggie, putting a hand on his shoulder to comfort him. Reggie turned to him, silently asking him if he believed his words. “Maybe she just left because she couldn’t be here.”

Reggie nodded for a moment before shaking his head. “There’s no way Y/N just left.” Reggie whispered before falling into the chair next to him, feeling Luke’s hand land on his other shoulder. “What did she do?”

Alex looked to Luke, seeing him in a state of deep thinking much like Reggie and while Alex was desperately worried about you, he knew neither boy was alright after your absence and possible connection to them being free. He looked to Julie, hoping she could offer help but as he looked up, his eyes scanned past her to the entrance of the studio.

His heart skipped in his chest. “Willie?” He called out before dropping a hold on Reggie’s shoulder and running to the boy, their bodies colliding together only a second before their arms pulled the other as close as possible.

“You’re okay.” Willie whispered out in thanks as he buried his face in Alex’s shoulder, feeling Alex do the same to him. Willie was the first to pull away, his hand slipping into Alex’s perfectly as he pulled him to where Reggie, Luke, and Julie were. He looked to the girl who looked surprised to see him. “You must be Julie.”

“I am.” She nodded. “You must be Willie, and I’m not even going to question how I can see you right now.”

Willie gulped. “Well, I might have an answer to that.” The four of them furrowed their brows at him. Willie sat Alex down on the couch and sat next to him, Julie and Luke slowly falling into seats as well since Reggie was already sitting, still fretting over you. The skater took a deep breath. “Y/N showed up at the club.” He looked around the room, gaging their reactions as Alex’s grip on his hand tightened. “She made a deal with Caleb.”

Your friends listened to Willie explain everything, from you showing up and demanding to speak to Caleb, to him listening with his ear pressed against the door as you practically gave your soul to him in exchange for the four of them, and to your very first performance at the club, something Willie couldn’t stay for as he ghosted out to find the boys.

“She gave herself up for us?” Luke clarified; his eyes locked on the floor as he imagined you doing exactly what Willie described. He felt sick. You did the very last thing Luke could’ve wanted. He wanted you to be happy and stay with Julie and both of you think the boys crossed over, now Caleb had your soul and forced you to be a part of his band for eternity. “We’ve got to save her.”

“You can’t.” Willie reminded him. “Caleb’s too powerful.”

“There has to be something we can do.” Reggie agreed with Luke. There was no way he was going to leave you, his sister, in the hands of Caleb.

“There’s not.” Willie refused to lift his eyes to look at them. “I’m sorry.” Alex squeezed his hand, but Willie still couldn’t look at him.

“It’s not your fault. And it’s not Y/N’s either, she was just trying to save us.”

Luke’s leg was bouncing as he jumped up and started pacing, finding Alex’s habit very head-clearing. “We can’t just leave her there.” His voice was stressed as he talked through his pain, not the same physical pain from the jolt but a pain in his heart that hurt a hundred times more.

Heads turned at the sound of Ray shouting outside of the studio, probably sticking his head through the gate. He shouted Julie’s name before telling her they were waiting for her to celebrate. Julie’s eyes widened as she remembered she was supposed to celebrate with her family who was oblivious to the situation.

“I’ll be there in a minute!” She shouted back before looking at the boys. “I have to go.” Her stomach fell. “I can’t really tell him my friend who’s been dead for 25 years traded herself to a ghost club to save my band.” She was upset and everyone could see but it wasn’t as if Julie could do much. They didn’t know what she could see or do in the ghost club. She started to stand up before hesitating, putting a hand on Luke’s shoulder. “Get her back.” She told him and he nodded, reaching up to grab her hand briefly before she wiped away her tears, trying to fix herself up before she went inside.

When she was gone, the boys sat in silence for a few seconds before Reggie stood up and took a deep breath. “So, what’s the plan to save my sister?”

---

You weren’t sure if the fatigue you faced as you sat backstage was from the 4 songs you just performed or from trying not to cry, but the longer you sat there, the harder it was to hold back your emotions. You were exhausted as you pulled yourself up, kicking off the heels Caleb put you into and finding a little corner you could collapse on the ground. The moment you hit the ground, you let your sobs rack through you.

You never got to say goodbye to your friends. You just left them there crying. You didn’t even know if Caleb really let them go or if… or if you were too late. You haven’t seen Willie since you asked him to bring you to Caleb and that was the only hope you had.

“Y/N!” You heard Caleb sing out your name, only making you suck in a breath, swiping under your face to see the makeup you were wearing hadn’t smeared. “Y/N!” He called again and you tried to stand up, ignoring the wobble of your legs under you. Caleb came around the corner and your eyes narrowed at the smile on his face. “There you are!”

“What, did I run away before another song could start? My bad.” You started walking away from him, your heels hitting your sides as you carried them, no longer wanting to wear them.

Caleb appeared in front of you with a smirk as you stopped walking and clenched your jaw. He offered a forced laugh and put his hand on your shoulder to turn you around. “I was going to show you to your dressing room.”

“How thoughtful of you.” you grumbled as he brought you to a backstage area that resembled the many dressing rooms you’ve been in before. This one had to be one of the nicer ones, you’ll admit that. You let your eyes scan over the room from the vanity in front of you to the line of costumes by the door to the plate of fries that sat on the table. You eyed the plate carefully, wondering why it was there before Caleb laughed quietly at you.

“Try some.” He gestured to the fries before picking one up and eating it himself with satisfaction. You’d forgotten the boys mentioned food here being something ghosts could eat.

“I don’t want any.” You turned your back to Caleb and the food as you walked to the mirror, finally seeing what you looked like after your little transformation.

“Well, I’ll leave you to get comfortable.” He said before heading to the door. He stopped in the door, meeting your gaze as you looked through the mirror. He didn’t say anything, but the smirk on his face was enough and when the door was closed, you allowed yourself to sit in the chair placed perfectly in front of the mirror.

Your eyes drifted across your appearance. The dress that clung to your body enough to look flattering and the makeup that made you look more like a showgirl than a teenager. You didn’t look like you. Pulling open the drawers under the mirror, you found makeup wipes and quickly wiped them across your face, trying your best to get all the makeup off until you could look in the mirror and see yourself. At that point, you needed to get out of this dress. You were going to try and find the most comfortable-looking costume to change, but your eyes landed on a certain outfit hung up that made you knot your brows.

You grabbed it slowly, pulling it out to see a tank top with the Sunset Curve logo printed on the front, a shirt you definitely didn’t own, along with a pair of ripped black jeans. What caused you to pause entirely was your leather jacket sitting on a hanger next to the outfit along with a note from Caleb.

For your comfort. Enjoy.

You scoffed. Sure, you were thankful for the change of clothes, but nothing could make you enjoy this place. Not performing, not a plate of fries or your private dressing room, and definitely not clothes. But it wasn’t like you could back out of the deal.

---

“Let’s just go get her!” Luke held back his shout after the millionth hour of trying to figure out a plan.

The other 3 boys, as well as Julie, groaned at him. “We can’t!” Alex reminded him and Reggie who was nodding his head in agreement with Luke.

“And why not?”

“Because she got the stamp.” Willie mumbled, his head resting back on the couch as he stared up at the ceiling. “If you just take her, the stamp could still-“

“Kill her?” Reggie interrupted with worry and Willie gave him a sad look before nodding. “So, there’s really nothing we can do?” When no one answered him, Reggie knew it was pointless. You were gone. “Can I-“ He stopped himself, glancing at his friends, “Is there a way we could say goodbye? For real?” He asked Willie and the skater thought about, how he would go about it but ultimately, he nodded.

“I’ll see what I can do.”

---

Willie was pacing back and forth in front of the Hollywood Ghost Club, trying to work out the plan in his head. He was just about to head inside before he was stopped by Caleb appearing in front of him.

“Caleb!” He gasped out, jumping backward as the man looked at him unimpressed.

“I believe I let you leave. Why could you possibly be back?” Caleb raised a brow at him and Willie gulped.

“Well, I-“ He cut himself off, the fear of working under Caleb returning and he wanted to poof away. Then he thought of Alex, of how Alex seemed so hopeful to at least see you again and know you were okay and he knew he couldn’t just give up because he was afraid. “It’s about Y/N.”

“What about her?”

“The band wants to say goodbye to her.” Willie held his head up, making Caleb smirk.

“Is that all?” Caleb asked and Willie’s face faltered for a second before he nodded. “No.” Willie’s face fell entirely as Caleb started to turn back to the door.

“5 minutes!” Willie pleaded and Caleb stopped moving. Willie thought he was going to keep walking until his back straightened and he looked over his shoulder at the boy.

---

You were crashed on the couch, staring at the ceiling above you and imagining it was the stars, back to last night when you thought you were saying goodbye to your family, the last time you felt peace. A knock broke through your silence as you groaned and pushed yourself up only to open the door to see Caleb standing there.

“What do you want?” you let him into the room, moving to lean on the wall next to the door.

“I have a surprise.” Caleb smiled at you. “I hope this will help you realize we’re not enemies here.” His hands fell on your shoulders and the smile he offered you unnerved you. You had no clue what he was giving you and that scared you. “You have 5 minutes.” He stepped back, giving you another smile before waving his hand and snapping toward the middle of your room.

Your breath stopped as Reggie, and Alex all appeared out of nowhere. The sound of the door closing as Caleb stepped out knocked you from your frozen stance as you launched yourself into Reggie’s hold.

Tears were already starting down your face as he cradled your head against him, his arms wrapped around you so tight that you were sure you weren’t breathing, but it was fine because technically you were already dead.

“You’re here.” You whispered to him, squeezing him tight to reassure yourself that your brother and the others were really here. “You’re all here.”

“Did you think we were just going to let you leave without saying goodbye?” Alex asked, holding back his cries. You pulled your head up, looking over to him and smiling as your tears fell.

“Where’s Julie?” You knew the answer as soon as you asked it and you shook your head to tell them so. Caleb couldn’t bring Julie in here because she, thankfully, wasn’t a ghost. “I’m really sorry. For everything.” You told them, glancing between Reggie and Alex. You couldn’t bring yourself to look at Luke, if you did, you didn’t know what you would say. “I couldn’t let you guys die.”

“So, you gave yourself up to Caleb?” Reggie asked as he pulled back, wiping away the tears on your face and not caring about the ones on his own. You looked into his eyes, feeling your heart sink as you nod.

“I couldn’t let you guys die.” You repeated before Reggie pulled you into his arms again. When he was done, you moved to Alex, seeing him fight the waterworks and he’s no doubt struggling. You spared him, slipping into his hug as he held you quickly, his face buried against your shoulder and you knew he was trying to wipe his eyes behind your back.

You were starting to lose track of the time as you realized you were almost through your time and you couldn’t help the cry that escaped as you looked at the clock. Now it was time for the hardest goodbye, the only person you never got to say everything you’ve wanted to.

Luke stood there as you said goodbye to everyone except him, as you looked at everyone except him, as you spoke to everyone except him and he didn’t know how he held himself together for that long. You were right there in his arms reach and Luke didn’t know what to do or to say.

Your eyes met and the tears Luke had let fall free felt heavy on his cheeks as you stepped closer. Your eyes flickered down to his hands enough for him to bring his to yours. When you felt his touch against your hand, your fingers fell into place between his and Luke and you stepped even closer, the room falling absolute silent. You just stared at each other, no words or goodbyes being said until you threw your arms around his neck and his went around your waist to hold each other close.

You thought you were going to break in your brother’s hold but it was nothing compared to the way you sobbed into Luke’s shoulder, feeling him do the same. It was as if his touch opened the floodgates and there was no way you could close them.

“I’m sorry.” Luke managed to choke out as he buried his face in your shoulder, his eyes closing but doing nothing to stop the tears that slipped past.

“Why are you sorry? You did nothing wrong.” You pulled away to look in his eyes, your hand cupping his cheek softly, your fingers dancing against his skin as Luke shook his head.

“I should have told you something a long time ago.” Your head tilted as you tried to figure out the meaning behind what he was saying, but you didn’t know how much longer you could hold your secrets in for every second the clock ticked behind you, you felt your mind going crazy.

“I have something I need to tell you, too.” You told him and Luke nodded, tightening his grip on your hand.

“C-Can I go first?” He stammered and you gulped before nodding, glancing at the clock before meeting his eyes. When you did, you recognized the look in his eyes. It was the same one you wore when you looked at him.

Luke didn’t say anything. His mouth hung slightly open, but he didn’t know how to express the feelings he held for you. He wanted to listen to Alex and Reggie’s advice and just blurt out ‘I love you’, but it didn’t feel like enough. So, he thought and he remembered a time he truly knew he was in love with you, when the two of you were connected beyond anything he had felt with anyone.

Step into my world, Bittersweet love story ‘bout a girl,

Your breath hitched as Luke started singing, the same song you sang together just days ago. You were so lost in each other that you forgot the rest of the world existed. It was just you two.

Shook me to the core, Voice like an angel, I've never heard before,

Your hand threaded with his again as you stepped back, slowly falling into the trance of Luke and you once again. Reggie, Alex, Caleb, the ghost club; everything faded away until it was just you two staring into each other’s eyes and never wanting to look away.

Here in front of me, Shining so much brighter than I have ever seen,

When you started singing, your feelings put into the song, Luke knew Reggie was right. Your feelings were the same as his and Luke waited all this time for nothing, he could have told you the truth a long time ago. But now is better than never. With his one hand still holding yours and his other wrapped around your waist, Luke let his forehead fall against yours.

Life can be so mean, But when he goes, I know he doesn't leave,

Your voice cracked as Luke and you started to sing together and you barely got a few words into the next verse before you stopped and cried out and said what you’ve wanted to say for years.

“I’m in love with you.”

For a moment in the room, amongst the four heartbroken teenage ghosts, it was as if time froze. Your eyes were closed and your head dipped in relief. Had your eyes been opened, you would’ve seen Luke’s eyes light up and his lips pull into the soft smile you’ve fallen in love with. Instead, you only heard him whisper back, “I’m in love with you, too” before his lips hit yours.

The kiss shared between the two of you was effortless and it was simple. You didn’t have to think with him. Luke’s grip on you never faltered, pulling you close to him as he let go of your hand to cup the bottom of your jaw toward the back of your neck, tugging you closer to him as his fingers gently tangled in your hair. You lost yourself in the feeling, kissing Luke back with everything you had in you.

You didn’t want to pull away, you wanted to stay here in this bliss forever, but the feeling in your wrist like a dull pain that was more an annoyance wasn’t going away. So, you pulled away.

Luke and you locked eyes with matching smiles, both heartbeats beating fast in your chests until you heard either Alex or Reggie gasp, you weren’t sure which. “Y/N.” Reggie said before he was at your side, scaring you with his speed.

“What? What’s wrong?” You asked as he grabbed the wrist that caused your distraction as your eyes doubled. The stamp was slowly rising off you, shining as it grew in the air, and just like when you watched Caleb free the boys, it disintegrated.

You looked up to your brother first, your wrist still in his hand as he slowly smiled and you couldn’t help the laugh of relief that escaped from your smile. Then you looked to Alex, who stood with a dropped jaw and eyes locked on your wrist but you could see his breathing skip as he understood what this meant. Finally, you turned to Luke. His eyes were glued to the side of your face since the stamp was gone. He didn’t know how to feel right now. You’re safe. You’re free. You’re in love with him.

You pulled your wrist from your brother and jumped in Luke’s arms, your legs going around his waist as he spun you around. When your feet hit the ground again, you moved your face in front of his as he smiled. “I love you.” he repeated, wanting you to know he didn’t just say it because he thought he’d never see you again. He said it because he truly meant it.

“I love you too.” You whispered, pushing your hand through his hair. You were leaning in about to kiss him before Alex cleared his throat, causing the three of you to look at him.

“Sorry, didn’t mean to disrupt this beautiful moment you’ve got going on, but maybe this is something you can continue back home? Not in the ghost club that could trap us forever?”

Alex was right and the four of you took each other’s hands and disappeared, seconds before Caleb rushed back in, well aware of the fact that somehow, you’ve lost your stamp.

---

You’ve never been more thankful to be back in Julie’s studio before in your life. Relief was written across everyone’s faces and you leaned into Luke’s side and his arm went around your shoulder as he pressed a kiss onto your temple. With a look up at him and a warm smile on your face, you quickly finished that kiss Alex interrupted before it could start.

You both giggled, cheeks flaring as you’ve come to term that things are going to be different from now on, but a good different, nonetheless. Reggie pulled you away from Luke, getting a hug that wasn’t sad and you reciprocated right away, your brother’s hugs always making you feel at home.

“I’m so glad you’re alright.” He said when you separated and you nodded frantically.

“I’m so glad we’re all alright. I mean, I can’t imagine how awful this night could’ve been if it had gone any other way.” You looked around, seeing the three boys nodding their heads in agreement before you paused. “Where’s Julie?”

None of them knew, but you had a small guess on where’d she’d be. You teleported to her room, standing at the foot of the bed as you looked at the crying younger girl on the bed, her head buried in the pillows and your heart ached for her. “You cryin’ over me, Jules?”

Her head snapped around so fast you were certain she had whiplash. She didn’t acknowledge any pain of the action before she leaped out of the bed and into a hug with you. You laughed out, happy to see the tears had stopped as you hugged her back. “You’re okay!” She cried out and you squeezed her before you tensed.

“Wait, a minute, how can I-“

“Freaky, right?” Julie interrupted you and your eyes widened. “It happened with the boys earlier too, after you had…” She trailed off, her eyes glancing down to your wrist before flickering back up to your eyes.

You smiled at her, bringing a hand up to cup her cheek, and shook your head. “It’s not there. I’m free.”

“No one made a deal this time, right?”

You laughed again and shook your head, unable to keep the smile on your face at bay. “No. No, this time it was something else.” You thought about Luke and your kiss, how it erased the stamp and Julie cocked her head, wanting to know what was going through yours. “I’ll tell you later. Um, first I have to apologize.”

Her face softened and her hand fell on top of yours still pressed against her cheek. “You don’t have to do that, Y/N. You did what you thought was best was the boys. Just like you always do.”

“I shouldn’t have left you like that. I shouldn’t have left any of you like that.”

“Y/N.” Julie cut you off, knowing you were going to spiral in apologies. “Thank you for not leaving me.” You gave her a nod before another hug, basking in the first time you were able to touch and hug your friend. “Now come on,” she pulled back, moving to grab some tissues to wipe her tears as well as yours. “I’m sure the boys are waiting for you in the studio.” Julie stuck her elbow out and you quickly locked it with yours before the two of you skipped quickly out of the house and into the studio. Willie was there again and, in your presence, he smiled and stepped forward.

“Thank you.” He said and it was more than enough for you as you glanced down to his hand interlocked with Alex’s and you couldn’t help but smirk.

“Don’t mention it, Willie.” You told him, giving him a fist bump that Willie happily returned. Luke surprised you as he snuck up behind you, pulling your back against his chest and his arms went around your waist.

You chuckled, turning to look over your shoulder and you kissed him, only to pull away and see a giddy Julie trying to hide her surprise. You had a little to catch her up with.

“Okay! Okay!” You shouted, putting your hands in the air as everyone paid attention to you. “I know tonight has been… less than ideal-“

“That’s one way to put it.” Your brother interrupted you and you lightheartedly glared at him.

“I know tonight has been less than ideal, but I do believe we had a damn good performance at The Orpheum and I, for one, would like to celebrate that.” There were cheers from your friends as you migrated to the seats. Luke, Reggie and you took the couch with you in the middle and leaning back against Luke and your legs resting on your brother’s lap. Luke’s arms were wrapped around you comfortably and as your band celebrated, the two of you snuck kisses, which when you were sometimes caught by your brother, earned you both remarks about him not wanting to see his sister and best friend making out, but Luke and you only responded with more kisses. Willie and Alex were sitting on the floor close enough that when one moved, the other did as well. Julie was perched on the chair next to Luke, right where you could reach out and grab her leg or hand to get her attention, and with the levels of laughs and conversations in the room, it was something you had to do quite a bit.

You all stayed there for hours, even Julie who was the only one who needed sleep. Soon though, she was slumped in the chair and your conversation was taken down in volume to allow her the sleep she needed and deserved.

You didn’t know what awaited you if you ever crossed over, but you could imagine if it brought you peace and happiness then it would feel like this moment with your family. Life, and death, was a leap of faith, but for them, you’d jump a thousand times.

@hoechx // @katrin-okay // @ifilwtmfc // @winchestergirl907 // @rachelle3musicals // @im-sorey // @magicalxdaydream // @sovereignparker // @yagorlemmalyn // @wanniiieeee // @vengefulsokovian // @starjane312 // @kexritz // @tuttigunner // @sunsetcurvej // @lukewearingbeanies // @whotfisdani // @killerqueenfan // @bubblyabs // @who-even-is--galileo //@lizpop // @lovesanimals // @ponyboys-sunsets // @caprisunsister // @tenaciousperfectionunknown // @caswinchester2000 // @avngrsinitiative // @usuallyunlikelyfox // @iainttakingshitfromnobody // @voidmalfoy //

LET ME KNOW IF I MISSED ANYONE!

#luke patterson x reader #luke patterson #luke patterson imagine #Luke Patterson x Reggie’s sister!Reader #Luke Patterson x Peters!Reader #Reggie Peters x reader #reggie peters #jatp x reader #julie and the phantoms #jatp imagine #julie and the phantoms imagine #jatp #julie and the phantoms x reader

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potterandpreferences · 3 years ago

Text

The Way To A Man's Heart

Pairing: Ron Weasley x Reader

Setting: Half-Blood Prince; For the purposes of this one-shot, Ron dated Lavender in OotP

When you and Ron had started dating, a lot of people were convinced it would not last. Apparently, the school cohort was under the impression that he and Hermione were going to be the Hogwarts power couple. You could kind of see where they were coming from; there had been a lot of petty jealousy on both sides and there had been a sense that it was playground pigtail pulling. And yet, you couldn't help but think that those people were also selectively blind to how toxic that sort of relationship could be. Honestly if it wasn't for Harry, you didn't believe Ron and Hermione would still be friends six years down the line.

As it was, you had come to be somewhat of a secret friend to Ron Weasley. When he was at odds with his two best mates, he could find some solace in your company. Whether it was playing exploding snap, hanging out on the quidditch pitch (even if your feet stayed firmly on the ground some of the time), or - despite what others would believe - doing homework together in the library.

As a consequence of spending so much time with him one to one, it didn't take long to learn some of Ron's tells. When he was really, truly upset, he went off his food. When he was irritated, he preferred something like a pumpkin pasty or a sandwich, something he could tear into. When he was happy, he'd try some of everything, content with a little of lots until he went in for seconds. When he was feeling a bit down or worried, his preference of choice was a hearty stew followed by a warm apple pie with ice cream, something that reminded him of home.

This particular day it was sunny and one of the warmest thus far. Spring was slowly transitioning into summer, and with it exam season was upon the students of Hogwarts. Sixth year didn't count in the same way that seventh year would, but your continued presence in all your chosen subjects depended on passing all of their exams. And so, along with the sunshine, fifth years and up were also being subjected to the heat fueled by their ever increasing panic, which made sitting outside with a nice cool breeze all the more tempting.

You had been attempting to study in the library, but the librarian had all the windows firmly shut and it got a bit too stuffy for your liking. You checked out the books you required for your first exam, and ambled down the corridors in search of an empty courtyard. It was as you were descending the stairs to the first floor that you noticed a certain redhead stomping towards the doors that led outside, with the proverbial storm cloud raging above his head.

Concerned, you followed. He didn't slow his pace or give any indication that he knew he was being followed, something which raised even more alarm bells. Ron, as a by-product of living with the twins, was usually very aware of someone being on his tail. Ron's long legs carried him to the shore of the Black Lake. He followed the edge around to a little outcrop coated in pebbles and stones. These he grabbed at roughly, before launching them out towards the water with a growl.

"Ron? Are you okay? What's happened?" You approached cautiously, making plenty of noise as you walked closer so that your voice didn't startle Ron into accidentally throwing any remaining stones at you.

"Hermione bloody Granger is what happened!" He yelled.

You made a soft sound of understanding at his near shout. "Want to tell me what she did this time?"

Ron sighed, tossing the last stone into the water as he stared at the horizon for a long moment. Then, he sat down on the roots of a nearby tree and started to explain.

"I was revising for transfiguration. Had one of my old essays out for vanishing vertebrates, you know? Figured looking at where I went wrong on something that's bound to come up on the exam would be a good idea."

"I take it Hermione had different views on the matter?" It really had become something of a thing that your entire year and to an extent the years below knew. Never, ever do anything to get Granger started on how you should be studying, and Ron's mirthless chuckle did nothing to change your previous notion.

"She freaked the hell out. Started having a go at me for having got a P on an essay in the first place, told me it was useless trying to learn from rubbish like that, and then told me if I'd followed her revision schedule I'd have already covered the topic and at this point should be onto the practical wand work," Ron spat venemously.

"You know she's wrong, don't you?" It wasn't uncommon for Hermione to tell Ron that he was doing something wrong, and you knew that being told something repeatedly would make the thought that much harder to shake. How many more times would Ron be able to take unproductive, callous criticism from a snobby know-it-all before the thoughts became a fundamental part of his psyche?

"I know but... she just makes me feel like an idiot! I don't get the theory behind magic at a drop of a hat like she does! Hell, most of us don't. But you make one little mistake in your homework and she gets so bloody condescending," Ron sighed. Many thought he was lazy when he tried to get Hermione to do his homework. In truth, it was so he knew what she was expecting in the essay to avoid a rant - her, not the teacher!

"It sounds like it's gotten worse than normal. Actually it sounds like how she behaved when you dated Lavender last year," you commented. To be fair, dating was a very loose term for what Ron and Lavender got up to. It was too public to be just friends with benefits, but there weren't really any romantic feelings. The PDA was a bit much at times, but it was rarely ever Ron that initiated those instances.

"Ugh, don't remind me. I still have the scars from them birds! Mental, she is," he exclaimed. And yet, as you looked closely, you can't help but notice the tips of his ears were getting very red.

"Wait a minute - you're not dating Lavender again are you?!" His eyes widen in shock and he shakes his head, waving his hands in adamant protest.

"Merlin, no! I don't even - " He pulled a face of disgust. "I mean, I dunno, can't believe I dated her in the first place I suppose. Seems like a lifetime ago."

He was lying (you could tell from the way he fumbled for an explanation), but that was okay. You knew the sentiment was true even if he was sidestepping what he was honestly thinking about. You were curious, but you weren't going to push it. This wasn't the time for an interrogation by any means. Thus, you decided to change the topic entirely.

"Do you still feel up to studying some transfiguration? I have some books from the library and all my notes. I even have some cauldron cakes." When he refused both the studying and the food, you smiled sadly at him. "Okay. Well how about we go down to the quidditch pitch?"

And that was exactly what the pair of you did. You didn't feel like flying, so you sat in the stands and watched as Ron flew for a couple hours. He zoomed around the pitch in patterns you recognised from quidditch practice drills, before enchanting the practice quaffle so that he could work on his keeper skills. You called Dobby when you were sure Ron wasn't looking, and when Ron eventually joined you in stands, it was to find a delicious bowl filled with a generous helping or rhubarb and apple crumble waiting for him.

"I thought you might have worked up a bit of an appetite. Some of those drills looked tough," you admitted when he stared silently in surprise, mouth gaping.

"It's like you read my mind!" was all Ron managed to say before he was practically inhaling the food, shovel sized spoonfuls disappearing with complete gratitude no matter how swift.

"I just know you, Ron," you laughed. It should gross you out how much he ate so quickly, but his only fault at foodtime was talking with his mouth full. None ever spilled on his clothes, and his chin was remarkably clean.

When the pudding was half gone, Ron slowed down enough to process what you had said. "How d'you mean, you know me?"

"Well, when you're really upset, you don't want to eat, but flying makes you happy. When you've had a fight with Hermione, you usually tend to prefer something filling and pies and crumbles are your go to when you're feeling a bit down still."

He stared at you like he'd never seen you before. No one else had ever noticed - or at least mentioned - knowing what he liked to eat and when. Oh sure, lots of people had commented on his appetite and knew him not having much of one was a sign something was wrong, but the nuances? What food went with what situation? That was all you.

And, he realised as he ate in companionable silence next to you, this wasn't the first time you knew what he wanted to eat after having a falling out with his friends or stressed out about exams. The cauldron cakes you had in your bag, he liked to eat them when he was feeling nervous about school work. He rarely saw you eat them though so... did you keep some in your bag just for him? And there were all those other times too, when you just seemed to know when he was actually hungry and when he was just bored.

There was a plethora of things unique about his relationship with you that he adored, and he had sort of had thoughts that weren't strictly platonic about you, but this little insight into how much you knew about the things that went unsaid was what made what he was about to do next feel so incredibly right.

"Er, Y/N, I was wondering... would you like to go on a date some time?"

#ron weasly x reader #harry potter imagine #harry potter oneshot #ron weasley #ron weasley x you

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jean-does-not-have-a-horseface · 4 years ago

Note

hi can i please request one where levi's s/o is sort of like him in personality but just melts whenever theres a baby. like she'll see a baby in town and will go from silent and moody to the heart eyes emoji but a person, or she'll babysit her neice or nephew or cousin and will be just so loving and bubbly? like its obvious that she wants to be a mum but she never brings it up because she doesnt think he wants kids and eventually they get pregnant + his reaction? sorry if this is too much (1/2)

ΑΝΟΟΟΟΝ IM BLUSHING THANK YOU SO MUCH. I really loved this request and it inspired me so I pushed before others because I had to get it out of my system. I hope you like this. It's super duper long also👉👈

Warnings: uhh pregnancy, mentions of anxiety

Tags: fluff, domestic Levi, pregnancy, modern au

Pairing: Levi/ Reader

Baby Fever

Your heartbeat grew louder with each passing second as Mike abused the door with one too many knocks. You didn't know if you could talk, or breath or do anything other than vomiting though this time from the anxiety building at the pits of your stomach and not due to your very recent event of morning sickness.

"Are you alright in there?"

You choke on your own voice as you try to huff a single response. It's not really up to your judgement of you're alright or not but rather in the small white object's that rests between the thumbs and pointer fingers of each of your hands. You contemplate if there's a way to not raise any more suspicion to the blond male, you're at his house for all that matters. Nanaba called you to take care of their their twins and you happily complied to your half sister's pleas because Mike had a very important job interview. Life had taken a toll on him lately, they couldn't afford a babysitter and he was just recently fired due to his company having to cut down expenses thanks to the pandemic. Amidst this pandemonium he had to find a way to provide for his family and help Nanaba with at least a short monthly salary. So babysitting your beloved niece and nephew wasn't much of a problem. Not until now.

At first it hadn't bothered you that your period was late, you had accepted the pcos lifestyle the hard way ever since you first got it. You would track down your period in hopes you could ever predict when it would come again but it always seemed to surprise you. Sometimes it would come in a months notice only to take four months to do a full circle. At twenty three, this was the most positive outturn as a resolution to your problem. Levi was pushing you to eat healthy and exercise to get a better grip of your situation, even though you knew it was in vain. And thus, overall it didn't bother you that you hadn't had your period still, fatigue and breast inflammation were also common problems due to hormonal abnormalities so you chose not to pay any attention to those early signs either.

What had driven you to urge Levi to drop you off to the drugstore next to Nanaba's house though was that you've been having symptoms of morning sickness for almost a week now, that you had tried to push aside for Levi not to notice. He would quarantine you on your on your own and go stay with Erwin and Hange had he any suspicion of you being down with the stomach flu. The stomach flu though didn't feel like that and you knew, you had been through it one too many times, this was something different and yet you cursed at yourself for overthinking it. You had bought the pregnancy test as something that was supposed to turn out negative, as a positive resolution that you weren't pregnant and that you should quest for whatever it was that was making your stomach turn and twist every morning.

Upon finally opening the door in an attempt not to delay Mike who wanted to attend his interview, the blond male inspected your form with a harsh gaze. "You shouldn't push yourself if you're sick. We could call my mother to watch over Eli and Blaire."

"No." You pushed it off. "I'm fine Mike, it's probably that weird mushroom soup I ate yesterday, Levi insisted on not buying it but I didn't listen."

"I see." Mike said scrunching his nose at the process. Sometimes you hated that he knew you so well that he could even smell you lying, but he was Nanaba's childhood friend before her mother married your father and had you; you had practically grown up with the blond duo so for all you knew, even if he was certainly aware that you were lying he didn't push things further. He simply placed a hand on your shoulder, the brother like nature of his touch as assuring as one can be. "If you need anything call me, I'll answer as soon as possible, drink lots of water and don't wear yourself down."

You bore your eyes into his and nodded simply. Mike greeted the twins with reluctance and let out a sigh before fixing his suit perfectly on his shoulders. The small kids smiled bubbly in return and waved at their father enthusiastically. As soon as the door closed and their father got out of sight both children jumped on you with loud giggles. The act alone was enough to curl your lips into an upward position.

By noon you had fed and lulled the kids to sleep, earning some significant time to sink into the crevices of the feathery soft sofa before Nanaba came back from her shift. As tiring as Eli and Blaire were you enjoyed their teeny company. You didn't mind their lack of ability to form full understandable sentences yet, you loved how they didn't even try to spare a second thought on what they bubbled on about and you did your best to provoke them to speak correctly. They would open their arms for you, their tiny palms signaling you to take them into long affectionate hugs as they called a baby spoken version of your nickname and you would melt at it every single time. Everyone knew you much you loved the chubby cheeked sweethearts, as much as it contrasted with your usual demeanor. There was something that truly made you feel like the best version of yourself when you were around them.

Babies seemed to be a hot topic in your group of friends for a couple of months now, ever since you started helping Nanaba in the house before Mike got fired. Levi seemed very unbothered by the subject in a way that saddened you almost; sure, you might have talked about it in the past, being that he was a little older than you and he might have understood that you longed to be a mother one day, but that was as far as that one conversation had gone. He still had that bored, stoic gaze that slipped off of yours when you would encounter a baby in the street, whereas you would basically make heart eyes and weird grimaces to any infant he would just click his tongue and avert his gaze away, to any other direction as if he disapproved off your fondness.

That memory alone left you hollowing inside as you recalled of the two very much pink lines on the screen of the test this morning. Naturally you would check with a doctor before jumping to conclusions, there still was a chance that the test was at fault and you wanted to bet on simply that. If the case was that you were actually pregnant though things were more complicated than you wanted them to be. For instance you were still in University, for your last year at that, but you had excessive amounts of studying to get your hands on your degree and Levi was cornered and ready to be squished by his job for being a vice president, which was unfair as he worked for Erwin. You understood the situation though as Erwin was struggling to keep the company going especially through these rough rough times. There was also the fact that you were terrified of Levi asking you to put the baby down, with pcos wearing your system down you were panicking that you wouldn't have a chance to conceive a baby later on. What if this was your only chance? You've always longed to be a mother so it didn't matter that it came to you this early right?

The sound of the front door clicking open shook you off your thoughts immediately. For better or for worse it was Nanaba that had finally returned, eager to strip herself of her clothes and face mask and run to the bathroom. She offered you small greeting to which you only nodded, your tired mind ordering your eyes to find comfort at small shapes in the ceiling. You didn't know how long your sister took in the bathroom, but judging by the lack of giggling coming from the babies' room you supposed it wasn't for long.

"You want to wait for Levi to come pick you up or should I give you a ride home when Mike's back? He should be home soon!" She spoke as she poured water in a red metallic boiler.

"I'll just walk. I need some air."

Nanaba emitted a soft hum in response "Are you alright? You seem off."

"Oh no." You brushed her off "I was just thinking about what I should wear at Erwin and Hange's anniversary dinner next week, and what gift to buy Levi now that his birthday is coming."

"Good, I see, just don't stress alright?"

___

The way home was longer than you had initially remembered, whether it was for your inability to walk with a steady pace or mostly because it was already getting dark and cold. You wondered if Levi would be getting home by now as you neared the apartment complex the two of you resided in. By the looks of your illuminated window he was already home as expected of him this certain hour. It probably was one of those days when he didn't have a strict deadline to attend to, which, under normal circumstances, only meant more cuddles and kisses for you. Yet, tonight was different.

"Hey Levs" Your voice lingered in his brain the moment you stepped inside.

"Hey brat, welcome home." The kiss you left on his cheek as you hurriedly headed to the bathroom was different, off almost, and he picked up on it immediately. "Did Nanaba drop you off? I had asked Mike to come by tonight, he said he'd bring some tea leaves he bought for me."

He leaned at the frame of the door as he watched you wash every crevice of your face thoroughly, paying enough attention to the insides of your outer nasal cavity. He was pretty meticulous about hygiene and especially at times like these with a hole pandemic going on he wasn't taking any chances, you knew, plus you were kind of disgusted of germs lately yourself, you thought you finally understood where he was coming from. He took a few steps ahead, away from your body in search of a clean face towel to hand out to you when you were done. You have it to him, even if he seemed cold as stone that domestic lifestyle was mesmerizing to you.

"Thanks baby, you're the best." You half smiled.

"You good?"

At this point you wondered if you seriously we're so easy to read. You supposed you were off, but you were always off and unresponsive to many things so what exactly was it about today that made everyone know you had a conflict in your mind.

"Yeah I'm just tired, I walked here."

Levi clicked his tongue at that "Nanaba's home is very far away from here, have a shower and I'll rub your legs and feet." With eyes that never left yours Levi watched as your face lit up a little more, he gave you a tiny of a smile on return.

"You prooomise Levs?" You knew teasing with him could only lead to one thing, yet you did it shamelessly.

"Tch, of course, hurry up, I'm making pancakes with eggs and bacon."

Normally at the very sound of this particular food your eyes would water and your mouth would drool but the unresponsive nature of your expression only sent a new wave of worry through Levi's chest. As much as he had wanted to convince himself you were just tired, he couldn't, not after this reaction to your favorite snack. He decided not to push you into saying anything you didn't want to though. Maybe it was that enormous amount of notes you had to memorize for your next exams in addition to your fatigue and any hormonal altercations.

"Yeah" you trailed off "babe, about that, can we have cocktail shrimp? And maybe fried rice and fries? Pretty pretty please?"

Ah, there it was. Although it was a rare occasion for you not to be in the mood of his infamous pancakes, you could still have a few different cravings from time to time. Levi let out a sigh of relief as he proceeded your order trying to figure of where he should order from, last night's mushroom soup had messed your stomach up, that he knew, but you seemed to be fine now so in theory that should be enough to prevent him from whining out his concerns.

As he closed the door to the bathroom he hummed his favorite tune to himself, softly enough as not to disturb you with your bath. He picked up his phone from the kitchen table with ease before collapsing on the couch, there was a limit to what his body could take and he had surpassed that by far these past few months. Endless deadlines that took turns one after another and extra hours at the office had been killing him, mentally and physically, making him a little more grumpy than usual. In great addition his back ached, his fingers were sore and his mind felt like canned alphabet soup every single night. Perhaps, seeing him in this state was taking a toll on you as well; you were always so protective over him, almost like a mother to her child, despite being younger, and he if he had to, he'd admit he enjoyed it a little too much than he should have.

When you came out of the bathroom he gazed over you briefly, you were sitting before the end of the dresser, standing in front of the full body mirror, examining your form. He seemed to be puzzled by your demeanor once again. Normally, or up until yesterday, you would have immediately shot out to where he was seated at to plough into his arms with wet hair, only to slightly irritate him for getting him wet, not that he didn't enjoy to smell your fresh scent anyway, but it was a game of routine for you by now. It was almost as if you were seeking to be scolded at for not rushing to dry your hair. He always wanted you as healthy as ever.

You couldn't shake off your head how soft Levi's chest is. There probably wasn't a reason as to why he's sleeping shirtless tonight, your apartment was very warm, given that it was the start of December already, but you didn't complain. The feeling of creamy, milky soft skin, perfectly excused by any coarse hair was slowly putting you to sleep. You loved how Levi was so soft everywhere you touched, it was so unlike what the world perceived of him, maybe your baby's skin was going to be as smooth and perfect as his and not as dry and oily as yours. Of course the baby's skin was going to be soft, ugh and those little arms and legs, you couldn't lie to your self, deep down you were just a tad excited to have a baby, if it meant that it would look like Levi you wouldn't want to give up on it for the world.

"Levi, does Kenny keep baby pictures of you?"

"What?" The onyx haired male raised a brow at your inquiry but didn't give you enough time to repeat yourself before he answered. "My mother had so many pictures of me so I guess that it's natural that he has some and well there probably are a few pictures from after my mother's death, I'm not that sure."

In response, he only earned a hum.

"Tch, can I lay on your chest? I want you to play with my hair." His eyes pleaded with you in the darkness. Of course you could never say no to such thing, you loved it even more when he was the one sleeping on you. Another sentence left his lips, this time with a yawn as he shifted himself on you, cooing like a small child. "I'll call Kenny tomorrow, sleep now I know you need it."

____

Under any other circumstance you would have loved seeing everyone's dumbfounded faces stating at you as if they had seen the dead rise from their graves. You had to pinch your arms to remind yourself this was indeed serious and you shouldn't let out a single chuckle.

"Please tell me you're joking" Nanaba pleaded, placing her hand on yours in disbelief.

"I'm going to screeeeeam! Shorty can't even hold it in, ghaaaa!"

"Hange he will hear you through the restroom."

Hange blinked her eyes rapidly at the sound of that. "You haven't told him?" She immediately seemed to lose her enthusiasm, something you hadn't intended to happen, especially at such a night, but you knew you didn't have a say in other people's emotions.

"Hange he never seemed too fond of the idea, why would I complicated things for him?"

Mike's eyes widened in disbelief. There was no way in hell he was having this. You were practically his little sister, seeing you so tormented as you were in the moment when you spoke those words ravaged his last nerve, causing anger to clench his hands into fists. He watched as you took a small bite of your food giving the rest to Eli who was comfortably sitting on your lap, tapping his little hands on the rim of your plate. Other than the fact you broke out such news to him, Nanaba Hange and Erwin and had expressed your fears on informing your significant other, you seemed quite bubbly. Children really did bring out such a soft side of you, he knew that was for sure.

"Hange" you spoke, unphased as ever "Levi's coming please stop screaming at me, i love you but it's only making me dizzy."

It felt as if a thousand pairs of eyes were burning holes through his whole body, his head, and everywhere around his personal space bubble. Levi could feel his pulse tense just a tad, Hange's unnerving gaze and her crippling smile were fixated especially on him, making his nose itchy. There was something very different in the atmosphere around him; Nanaba wasn't eating anymore, she was more fixated on her daughter than anyone else, Erwin was nervously staring between him and you and you and Mike were trying to clean Eli's hands from the food he had just touched. When the scenery wasn't something irregular, none of you dared look eachother in the eyes, beat it that Hange was staring only at him.

"Oi, what the fuck is wrong-"

"Levi, shorty! Does Eli look like he's enjoying himself in (y/n)'s arms?" Hange turned her sweetened gaze on you, making you choke on your words, you shot her an atrociously strict glare. "Remember when Nanaba gave birth? What do you think about babies? Maybe you think they smell a lot? But what about ackerbabies?"

"Way to be discreet Han, thank you!" Your lips puckered in anger as you brought your arms to cross under your chest.

"Wait what's going on shitty glasses?"

"Yada Yada shorty, you're not getting a word from me, my lips are sealed" Hange spoke and shut her eyes to emphasize the significance of her words.

You sighed in a pathetic attempt to relieve some tention of your chest. A tight knot had formed due to anxiety, fog had clouded over your brain and you were feeling so faint and exhausted that you just wanted to get it over with. You didn't mind standing there like a fish out of water after breaking the news to him, the tention in the air was in fact what was making you suffocate in your seat. With wobbly hands you pushed Eli off your lap, not caring about the moan of disagreement he made and you shot up from your seat, announcing you had to take some fresh air. Levi had to stop Nanaba mid tracks to be able to come after you, fast enough to be there when you got out.

Naturally, you stood seated at a bench that neared the restaurant. Your hands were covering your face scratching softly through your hair, probably in attempts to calm your self down. He approached you without any second thought, this time determined to know what was it with you. Your behavior these past week had been unnerving and overly concerning to say the least. Carefully he sat himself down next to you, his right arm come around your frame comfortingly while the left one came to caress underneath your cheek.

"You should probably talk to me."

Your voice came muffled from between your palms as you still hadn't dared to look him in the eye. "Levi, I'm, I'm so sorry it's just... I'm very anxious."

"I think I figured that, brat." His voice was so soothing, it felt as if he was speaking to you in the comfort of your private room, not on a bench outside a semi fancy restaurant

"You know when Hange talked about ackerbabies she uhm, she might have had a particular baby in mind."

Levi blinked erratically for a single second before his mouth, unable to compel to his brain's orders, formed the shape of an oh. Of course, in the moment it was hard to click with any other even but he attributed that to his lack of knowledge over the situation. Had he any clue or suspicion that you could be pregnant he would have been able to realise that it wasn't that your stress had been messing with your stomach every morning and that your extreme fatigue couldn't possible align with the erratically swift rhythm of your palms. Of course, of course it wasn't a thermometer that you had disposed of in the toilet, he wanted to slap himself for being so naive as to believe that. He was strict with recycling rules, you wouldn't have just straight up there s thermometer in the trash. Fuck now's not the time to think about recycling.

With the soft, chaste kiss at the top of your hair you finally decided to turn your gaze to him. Watery eyes met with an adoring grey gaze, a gaze you've never seen at this extreme before. "I love you, you know." Another kiss meant your head got to lift a little more, just to get closer to him. "I don't say it often but you don't have to worry, I'll try to tell our kid more often."

Your eyes shimmered with adoration at his words, despite the cold weather you couldn't bring yourself to feel not even a little tingle, Levi was keeping you so warm with his words. "Really? You want this?"

"Tch why wouldn't I, you thought I'd ever let you go and leave me lonely? I've always thought you knew we're sharing the same future."

Your lips attacked his in fiery passion. It was a natural reaction to his words, an ice melting kiss, a promise for the future. There were many reasons as to why you lived Levi but maybe the fact that you would have a little stoic faced baby running around your feet made you love him a little bit more.

#aot #levi ackerman x reader #levi x reader #snk x reader #levi #aot x reader #shingeki no kyojin #levi ackerman #attack on titan #snk #Captain levi #modern au #levi x reader imagine #ahhhh brrr #wufff #daddy levi makes me go wuf #barkkk #eye-

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parvulous-writings · 3 years ago

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Medbay magic // Angela Ziegler (Mercy) x Reader

Request: Ello, It's me,Ya bor. So I wanted to request a lil' something- Can we get a one shot where Angela (Mercy, for those of yall that don't know (: )nurses the reader back to health, but ends up falling for the reader with all the time they spend together? Then she's super confused about her feelings and doesn't know what to do about it, and she's too scared to tell the reader, but... turns out the reader has always kinda liked Angela too, and they confess to Angela-And they all live happily ever after- 😭🤌No but fr ily bor ❤

Requested by: @rey-is-not-a-skywalker

Summary: The reader and Doctor Ziegler develop feelings for each other :)

Warnings: N/A

Words: 1.3K

Notes: I would like to thank one of my old classmates for the word soup conversation :) My requests are currently open! My pinned post (found here) contains both a list of characters I write for, and a masterlist!

Not my gif

You had been in the medical bay for nearly a week now. It wasn’t so bad, you supposed, you were being looked after well enough. You were frequently seen by several different doctors, one whom you greatly preferred over the others. Your favourite doctor was none other than Angela Ziegler, the best medic on the force. This wasn’t just your opinion either, this was just a common fact that everyone accepted. Under her care you had been nursed back from near death to almost perfect health. You swore on your own life that she was magic, it was like nothing you had ever seen. That wasn’t the only magic she used though, you were sure of it. She had managed to work her way into your heart as well, and you held her higher than any other.

During your time in the medbay, you had several deep conversations with Angela, when there wasn’t all that much for her to do, and she needed something to keep her mind busy. Most of the time they started as nonsense words that she would respond to fondly- word soup, she dubbed it. It was mostly obscure facts or some line of thought that didn’t make much sense. Angela’s personal favourite conversation was one from when you were half sedated due to the pain of your wounds, and you started spouting drivel about Sciron- an old figure in Greek mythology, who would ask passers by to help him was his feet. When they knelt before him, he would suddenly give them a kick over the cliff into the sea, where the victim's body was devoured by a huge monstrous sea turtle which used to swim under the rocks. How you remembered about such an obscure figure in common knowledge Ziegler didn’t know, but your words were even stranger. “What if the turtle was Sciron’s brother?” You posed, staring up at the ceiling as Angela patted down your bed, making sure you were comfortable. She laughed quietly at the absurd idea and shook her head slowly. “As interesting as the theory is, I do not think that that is what the Greeks were striving for when telling that tale...” “But why else would he feed the turtle, well, people?” “I do not know- but there are many instances of strange stories such as this, yes?” “I s’pose so..” You mumbled, pursing your lips in thought. “But like it could be his half brother, right? Cause that would explain-” “Quiet down now, you need rest, not stress over fiction turtles and the men who feed them.”

Why was this Angela’s most fondly remembered conversation? Purely because of it’s ridiculousness. It wasn’t often that such strange topics popped up; no matter what Captain Amari would have had people believe. Plus you didn’t remember it, and thus she could use it to entertain you in future.

Soon enough, Angela was conflicted as she walked to deliver you the news of your discharge from the medical bay. She was happy for you; she understood how frustrating it can be to be cooped up in one place for any prolonged amount of time. But she was almost... Melancholy, beneath that joy. With you leaving the medbay, she was unsure when she’d get to see you properly next. She didn’t get much free time when off the field or out of the medbay. Most of that free time was spent taking care of herself and her mental health, and was often only late at night. She wanted to spend more time with you so badly, that it made her heart practically ache from the thought of not seeing you for an extended amount of time. She had become enamoured with you, as unprofessional as that was. As she approached your bed, clipboard in hand, she took a deep breath. She forced a wide smile onto her angelic features, and cleared her throat to capture your attention when she got close enough. “Any news, Doc?” You ask with a small smile, to which she nods. “Yes, actually. You’ve finally been deemed fit to leave the med bay.” At this information you looked rather happy, and Angela couldn’t fault you for such a feeling.

As you started to sit up and swing your legs over the side of the bed, Ziegler also moved round to offer you some help should you require it. Your legs are a little weak after staying in bed for so long, so you are a little wobbly when you first get to your feet, but you don’t fall over, which is a very good sign in Angela’s eyes. “Thank you, Angela...” You smile at her, referring to everything she had done for you during your time in the medical ward. “Bitte.” She replied, quite curtly. “Before you go, actually, there’s a couple of things I’d like to talk to you about...” Your brows furrow as she keeps talking. “Is... Is something wrong?” “No, no, not at all.” Angela assured you, understanding why you may be anxious about her words- usually when doctors or medical practitioners say something like that it’s never really good. “Far from it, actually.” This put your mind partially at ease, but not by much. She tried to give you what was an encouraging smile, but all it really managed to do was set your heart a-fluttering. Angela cleared her throat quietly. “So- it may seem a little bit out of the blue for me to say something like this, I am well aware.” She started, trying to keep herself calm as she started to open up a little bit. “During your time under my care, I have... Grown rather fond of you; attached even.” With every word that passed her lips, you found yourself more and more awestruck. You silence seemed to unnerve Ziegler, causing her nerves to skyrocket. She remained outwardly calm, though. She didn’t know what to add to what she had said to improve it or make it less awkward, so she just stood there, tapping her fingers anxiously against the others.

“Really?” Is all you can think to ask, your voice laced with an incredulous wonder that sounded closely akin to adoration. You would have asked if she were joking, but you knew very well that Angela wouldn’t joke about something like this. “I...” You trailed off, trying to think of how to phrase your next sentence adequately. “I’m rather fond of you too.” You settled to using her own words to describe your feelings. The look on Angela’s face told you that she probably didn’t think she’d get this far. “Oh...” She seemed at loss for words.

You both stood their for a moment, trying to think of what to say to each other in light of these revelations. After about a minute or so, you broke the silence. “So.. Would you want to get a coffee, or tea sometime?” Your words seemed to break Angela out of a daze, and she gave you a rather large smile. “Ah, yes, that would be lovely... Tea, and maybe some chocolates? I can bring some Swiss chocolate... It’s the best.” She told you with a quiet chuckle, and you nodded eagerly. “That sounds good to me... What about time- when are you free?” Angela had to think for a moment, “I’m off shift next Thursday.. What about five o’clock?” She asks, and you nod happily. “Wonderful!” She chuckled. “I shall see you then... I think you should get going before Morrison starts complaining that I’m keeping you back unnecessarily... I do believe he wishes to see you.” She informed, the fondness starting to show through in her voice. You nod in gratitude. “Thanks, Angela... Could I call you Angie, now?” You asked, rather cheekily. Angela rolled her eyes a little bit at the question. “We’ll see. Now get going.” She hit your shoulder playfully, before moving away to fill in the paperwork about you being discharged. She gave you a final wave, and blew you a kiss as you walked out.

#mercy #mercy overwatch #mercy x reader #angela ziegler #angela ziegler x reader #overwatch #overwatch x reader

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shihalyfie · 4 years ago

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The difference between the friend dynamics in the Adventure and 02 groups

This is a point I’ve reiterated in a lot of my 02-based metas, but there is a fairly distinct difference between the Adventure Chosen Children having a tight, deep bond and yet not quite being friends in “social life”, whereas the 02 group was a much tighter group on a social level. I always feel that I need to be really careful about saying this, because if I don’t word it carefully, it sounds like I’m trivializing the Adventure group’s bonds (plus, a lot of Adventure diehards will get very upset at you for suggesting this no matter how you put it), so I thought I should write something a bit more in-depth about it.

I think a lot of of this ultimately ties into what each series was about. The fact that Adventure was meant to be a series about “self-recognition of the individual” whereas 02 was about “relationships with others” has been pointed out by many a fan (and official staff too, while we’re at it), and it naturally lends to how the characters and the relationships between them will have a fundamental difference.

The idea that the Adventure group wouldn’t be the type to get together all that easily never really took that long after Adventure to set in. Of course, Our War Game! having this as a plot point also had a meta purpose (basically, limiting the number of people who could participate in the Diablomon battle), but it also has a very important point behind it: the Adventure kids’ social lives were never all that intertwined.

Again, this is something that sounds really awful to say without further qualification. What do you mean, the Adventure kids weren’t friends? Does that mean their entire adventure was for nothing? Did they go through all that only to forget about each other right after it?!

Well, no, that’s kind of exaggeration. I think to properly flesh out the nature of the issue, it’s important to define the differing ways you can be friends with someone. Imagine that you go on the best vacation in your life. You meet a handful of people there. You swap stories and get life-changing advice. You take commemorative photos after some really spectacular experiences. You swap numbers and social media contacts and then you go home. Are you going to keep in touch every so often with the people who gave you some very important advice, and maybe check on their important life events or organize a reunion sometime in the future? Very possibly! Does that mean everyone you met at that trip will now be regularly going out for lunch with you every week now?...Probably not, especially if you already have friends from school. That doesn’t mean you aren’t friends with the important people you met during that best life-changing vacation; it just means that they fill a very different niche in your life from the friends who don’t necessarily understand the life-changing vacation but have the free time to chat with you over lunch.

When the Adventure group found themselves pulled into the Digital World during summer camp, they had already come from very different social spheres. In short:

Taichi, Sora, and Koushirou were the only ones with a background of knowing each other beforehand, thanks to being in the soccer club;

Yamato went to the same school as the others but was a stranger to them, to the point people didn’t even realize Takeru was his brother at first;

Mimi had her own friend circle (see Adventure episode 29);

Jou was assigned as Mimi’s camp group leader but had no other prior relation to her, and Yamato didn’t even initially know his age;

Takeru wasn’t even supposed to be there since he didn’t go to their school and was only tagging along with Yamato;

Hikari was brought halfway into the adventure by virtue of being the eighth Chosen and Taichi’s sister.

Although six of the eight come from the same school, you can see that they’re basically “kids brought together by a certain circumstance” -- they’re not kids who would have normally come into each other’s purview had it not been for this. Which also means that as soon as their adventure ended and some years passed, the aspects of their real lives and social circles started kicking back in:

Taichi continued soccer;

Yamato formed a band (and presumably had a good relationship with his own bandmates);

Sora quit soccer for tennis;

Koushirou quit soccer for the computer club;

Mimi moved to the US;

Jou started attending a private school outside Odaiba;

Takeru and Hikari were never in their age group to begin with.

In the case of Taichi, Yamato, Sora, and Koushirou, it’s representative of how, although they originally had a shared interest in soccer, ultimately, they started to drift into their own specialties. Again, remember that Adventure was a series fundamentally about finding yourself and finding your own path, and all of these choices actually tie into their character arcs: Taichi is a straightforward person and a natural, charismatic leader, meaning soccer was good for him to begin with; Yamato learned to become more sociable and make friends at school; Sora started playing tennis as part of properly reconciling with her mother, and Koushirou decided to pursue a club relevant to his actual interests instead of one purely so that he could have minimal presence in it.

Mimi’s moving to the US is an interesting case because it’s likely because she’s often described (by both fans and official staff) as someone who is easily likeable and can get along with practically anyone. Considering that she’s constantly considerate of others and lacking in condescension or malice, it’s easy to see why; her infamous bouts of complaining were largely because she was under a lot of stress at the time of Adventure’s events (it’s even said that her cracking under pressure was meant to be representative of how an ordinary child her age would react to the situation), and otherwise she has no problems making friends -- hence why she was shown in Adventure episode 29 as already having friends in Taako and Mii-chan that she presumably hung out with prior to the events of the series. So in moving to the US, the point is made that Mimi could move to an entire other country and still hit it up with people there (and she does, given how she makes friends in Michael and the other American Chosen without issue). So thus, Mimi’s moving is also part of her own path -- becoming an effective “ambassador” between international Chosen as they start to pop up all over the globe.

As for Jou, his character arc has heavily to do with the fact that he’s always been on the “elite” academic track -- Japanese school entrance exams stretch back as far as high school, so the fight to get into medical school comes back as early as here, and since the events of Adventure helped Jou come to terms with why he wanted to be a doctor rather than just following his father’s wishes, it’s understandable that he would now be putting everything into that goal -- even if it means going to a different school outside Odaiba and committing himself to the prep school life. And, generally speaking, the other kids respect that too, given that the only time they tried to pull him from it was a time they were literally suffocating on the spot and needed Ikkakumon’s specific backup badly (02 episode 16).

And finally, Takeru and Hikari? The fact that they’re that much younger than the others in this group really is a big deal. When they’re on something “purpose-based” like an adventure, of course the others will have no problem keeping them around, and of course they’ll be happy to participate with these older kids. But if we’re talking about mundane, ordinary life -- there’s not a lot of evidence to suggest they really would prefer the company of kids so much older than them for conversations over lunch. This is especially because it’s hard to imagine they didn’t have other friends at school, too.

Not that they mind being around all these older kids when the time calls for it, but as far as socialization goes, they have their own lives to live. And that’s fine; again, Adventure was a narrative about kids coming to terms with themselves and what they wanted, and it’s not their fault for prioritizing those paths and forming their own social circles rather than insisting on being a specific eight-person group (no matter how much the fanbase wants to have the romantic image of them sticking together all the time no matter what).

Plus, it’s not like they all completely drifted apart and cut each other off!

Just because they’re not “daily life friends” doesn’t mean they’re not still important to each other. 02 episode 38 has Taichi, Sora, Jou, and Koushirou show up for Yamato’s concert -- it’s unlikely they were attending every single one of his concerts, but this was a very important one that was going to be broadcast on TV, so it’s only natural that even Jou (who, again, doesn’t go to school in Odaiba anymore) would still come to support him.

In fact, the fact they can come together when a situation like this happens even without necessarily meeting up every single day of their lives is probably a testament to how strong that bond is in itself. They don’t need to hang out once a day or week to maintain their friendship, and having other friends they’d rather hang out with throughout the day or invite to events doesn’t necessarily mean the other Adventure kids are less worthy friends to them. That experience in August 1999 was so impactful on all of them that they will never forget it, so even if they spent quite a long amount of time not interacting with each other, when a circumstance that necessitates them coming together does bring them together, they can hit it off like nothing happened. Think about how you might have an important friend that you may not chat with on a daily basis, but you talk to them once in a while and hit it off like you never had a break in the conversation. But because that strong bond is based on that one very specific experience that happened in one specific summer, it’s only natural that the majority of meetups over this are going to be based on something to do with that experience, like Digimon incidents; for ordinary things like “band concerts” or “club activities”, it’ll naturally be easier to stick around friends who have more similar social interests, like fellow band or club members.

On the other hand, this is very much not the case for the 02 group.

To understand why the 02 group has a fundamentally different dynamic, we need to dial back to a little before the actual “adventure” part of 02 started.

Right off the bat, we see:

Takeru moves to Odaiba from Sangenjaya, and specifically to the same building Miyako and Iori live in, meaning he’ll be walking to school with them every day;

02 episode 7 indicates that the Motomiya and Yagami families live in the same apartment complex, meaning Daisuke and Hikari are also likely to walk to school together;

Miyako and Iori are established as having already long hit it off with each other as neighbors;

Daisuke, Hikari, and Takeru end up in the same class (with Daisuke and Hikari having known each other already).

In other words: Even before anything to do with Digimon had been introduced (or re-introduced, technically) into their lives, the kids were already being thrown into each other’s social circles. You could technically argue that Daisuke wouldn’t have necessarily met Miyako and Iori if not for the Digimon incident coming into his life later in the episode, but Takeru being neighbors with them basically fills in all of the gaps here -- unlike with the Adventure kids where the adventure in August 1999 threw them together when they likely wouldn’t have been in the same social circle otherwise, the 02 kids are the social circle even independently of the Digimon incidents. In fact, due to being functionally neighbors, there are a lot of ways these kids’ social lives intersect, with Daisuke and Miyako being Taichi and Koushirou’s juniors, Miyako working for Yamato’s band, Yamato being classmates with Miyako’s sister Chizuru, and Jun and Miyako’s other sister Momoe being classmates.

Since, again, 02 was a series fundamentally structured on examining relationships, you can basically view Adventure being a series about “bringing some people together as they find self-assertion even when they’re from different social circles” while 02 follows that up with “so if they were in the same social circle, how would they deal with that?” -- especially since 02 makes it clear that certain kinds of emotional baggage associated with that can actually make it much more complicated.

A lot of 02′s first half is dedicated to the 02 kids doing completely mundane things that have very little relevance to the Digital World conflict -- watching TV in the computer room (remember: this was before they realized the “genius boy” being covered on the news was actually relevant to this), or having a picnic in the Digital World. Mimi even explicitly points out that this kind of thing wouldn’t have happened with the Adventure kids, but it’s not just because of the fact that Adventure involved a lot of running for their lives! It’s easy to dismiss a lot of what happens in these early episodes as “filler”, but a lot of this is dedicated to depicting how the 02 kids were constantly spending time with each other for reasons completely separated from Digimon incidents. This even includes completely ordinary things like soccer games -- Takeru, Hikari, Miyako, and Iori come to support Daisuke with an obvious motive of seeing him do well, so it’s apparent that they’ve come to enjoy hanging out with him beyond just obligation.

Part of this is because of the different nature of the Digimon conflict that they experienced. The Adventure kids had an experience that really was, functionally, “one” experience -- an extremely formative and important one, but one condensed one that they all experienced together. The nature of what the 02 territory war and conflict was, on the other hand, meant that what the conflict “was” to the 02 kids was of a completely different nature. This wasn’t summer vacation; this involved going back and forth between the fight and real life, to the point where Digimon fighting became integrated into “daily life” -- so of course you’d probably hope that the people you’re fighting with are also people you like to bond with on a social level. “Digimon life” and “social life” became synonymous to them.

And when it all comes down to it, it’s hard to pinpoint a “single experience” that the events of 02 embodied, or at least in the same way August 1999′s adventure was. As much as they were running for their lives, the Adventure kids have the luxury of looking at the events of their series as a formative singular time for them, one that they could even look at nostalgically, but for the 02 kids, it’s hard to condense everything into one singular experience (it’s easy for the audience to see it as one series, but for the kids themselves, it’s a very long chain of vaguely connected events). Actually, most of the year involved fighting with someone who ended up becoming their important friend and the other involved helping him deal with his trauma, so it’s not like everyone would be likely to have the most romantic image of this experience itself to “bond” over as much as they care more about the take-home they got out of it: each other.

One thing that 02 doesn’t really spotlight front and center with its starter cast of characters is that, unlike the Adventure kids, who either came with their own social circles prior to Adventure or eventually developed their own in the course of their lives, it’s heavily implied that the 02 kids actually had difficulty making other friends even on a social level, or at least were likely to be in a situation where the other 02 kids really were better company than their other options even for mundane situations. This is especially in the case of the newly introduced characters, who are, effectively, a bit socially “displaced” from others and likely to have struggles fitting in.

There are quite a few signs that Daisuke had serious difficulty making friends prior to the events of the series (with Hikari being the closest thing he had to one), and the fact that the 12-year-old Miyako is portrayed as constantly hanging out with the 9-year-old Iori, brought together by being neighbors, rather than people closer to their own ages stands out. Iori is particularly interesting in that, unlike with Takeru and Hikari, who were portrayed as kids likely to socialize better with those their own age, Iori’s unusual maturity for his age heavily implies that he would actually be out of place with his classroom peers (a very common phenomenon for some people in real life, too!). 02 episode 3 depicting him left alone in the classroom with only a teacher to watch him while his stubborn fixation on principles leaves him slow to finish his lunch says a lot -- his own behavior is liable to isolate him from others, and it’s thus not all that surprising he ended up bonding with some kids who are older than him and more accepting (and even treat him with proper respect, too).

Takeru and Hikari, too. There’s been a lot of arguments over whether the two of them would theoretically be closer to the Adventure kids or the 02 kids, but I would honestly say it’s technically both at once -- they have the same “not socially close, but intuitively understanding” relationship that the Adventure kids all have with each other, but hold the other 02 kids as part of their social circle and hang out with them in “daily life”. So in other words, they have the Adventure kids’ relationship with the other Adventure kids, and the 02 kids’ relationship with the 02 kids. This is presumably why Takeru and Hikari end up hitting it off so well at the start of 02 even though they didn’t interact all that intimately in Adventure; not only do they have that shared experience they intuitively understand, they also were able to start hanging out in day-to-day life and actually, well, socialize.

This applies to them in relation to the rest of the group as well. While neither of them were necessarily portrayed as having social problems, one common thread between the two is that they’re both very emotionally closed-in. Takeru’s response to negativity is to cover it up with smiles, until he can’t hide it anymore and bursts (which scares the hell out of Iori in 02 episode 19 and ultimately forms the basis of their Jogress arc), whereas Hikari has issues vocalizing whenever she’s hurt or in pain (said by herself in 02 episode 31, but with precedent from Adventure episode 48). That means that, even with potential social circles at school, it’s unlikely they necessarily would have had someone they could emotionally bond with deeply off the bat (especially since Takeru had just moved from Sangenjaya), and it’s likely why they kept gravitating towards each other (despite never truly talking about anything in-depth for most of the series) up until the Jogress arc.

In other words, while the Adventure kids’ adventure of self-actualization meant that their relationships to each other were mainly formed on simply understanding that they had a similar experience and empathizing, the 02 kids -- full of a group of somewhat socially maladjusted and out of place kids, plus two who had been on the prior adventure but were young enough to now still be carrying some deep-seated, unresolved emotional baggage -- were in a position where they arguably needed each others’ help to grow.

Jogress isn’t just an obligatory evolution gimmick; it’s something very important to 02 as a series and understanding what it wants to say about relationships. I think one thing that makes me very sad is how often its constant pigeonholing as a gimmick makes me hear people saying that Daisuke and Ken was the only plot-relevant one and the rest were forced “spares”, saying that something like Takeru-Hikari and Miyako-Iori would make more sense. But when the point of the series is about building your relationships from scratch and learning to grow together, I really don’t feel that a story about relationships that naturally existed already would have helped it nearly as much. It’s not like Daisuke and Ken was that likely of a friendship, either!

This is especially in the case of Takeru and Hikari, who certainly were vibing pretty well with each other, but were still very emotionally closed-in with a lot of emotional baggage until the more to-the-point Miyako and Iori were able to break through their shells. (02 episode 13 is so often considered a “Takeru and Hikari bonding” episode, but while it does do a lot to show off the depth of their relationship that hadn’t been depicted much besides them just hanging out all the time, it also does not solve Hikari’s core problem in nearly the same way Miyako gets to the bottom of it in episode 31.) This is also why Takeru and Hikari have such a different relationship with the 02 kids compared to theirs with the Adventure kids; while they were largely tagging along with the older kids and learning a bit about inner strength back during their summer adventure, the 02 group is the one who not only provided them with friendship on a more equal peer level, but also poked deeply into their emotional issues that they very much needed others to help them out of. These are friends who finally get them.

That Ken ultimately becomes yet another addition to this group of kids in need of friends finding support in each other should go without saying -- after all, it’s made abundantly clear he was very lonely and friendless until Daisuke and the others reached out to him -- but it ultimately culminates in them choosing to integrate this lonely boy from Tamachi into their social life. (Remember: Ken is the only of the six 02 kids to live in Tamachi and not Odaiba, but the last quarter of the series has them going out of their way to meet up.) The episode that establishes that everyone has truly made their peace with Ken and wants to unequivocally support him (with the most originally stubborn against it, Iori, graciously accepting him) is sealed off with a Christmas party. A completely ordinary Christmas party that has nothing to do with the Digimon incidents at hand, where they can play meaningless card games and celebrate the little things like Ken laughing, because it’s not just forgiving him or learning to work with him, but actively enjoying his presence and supporting him.

The Digimon Animation Chronicle profile for Ken in Diablomon Strikes Back refers to him as Daisuke’s “best friend” (親友). Usually, the word for “friends” within Adventure and 02 would be nakama (仲間); you may have heard this word from One Piece fans, but this is a word that roughly means “one of us” and has a stronger emphasis on being in a certain group, or being like-minded. Thus, “you’re a Chosen Child like us,” or, more pertinently, “you have the same goal as us and we’re in this together” (after all, it’s not like being a Chosen Child was ever an exclusive club or anything).

But in the case of Daisuke and Ken’s relationship, it’s not just about having happened to gain a deep bond over the course of 02, it’s that Daisuke now really does have a sense of emotional closeness to Ken that the two are considered best friends by default -- in any situation, despite him living all the way in Tamachi. Even though the franchise loves to put them in the category that “protagonists and rivals” usually get, where most others are ones who tend to have friction but understand each other in the end, Daisuke and Ken are unique in that they’re not like that at all. They have a very straightforward sense of emotionally confiding in each other, at worst maybe lightly bantering a bit, but they are friends before anything else, and that extends to the rest of the 02 group as well.

The aftermath

On its face, it sounds like the 02 kids are getting a pretty luxurious deal -- they got a fun adventure of emotional growth out of it, and they’re tight friends with each other at that! Well, that probably sounds great, but there’s a flip side to all of this.

Firstly, as I mentioned earlier, the Adventure kids’ adventure in 1999 was a lot more “romantic” than the 02 kids’ eight-month-long ordeal. Sure, a lot of it definitely was stressful, what with the running for their lives and the scary villains and the emotional conflict, but there was also the part about getting to meet Gennai and the other friendly Digimon around and getting to explore villages. They were on summer break, so they didn’t even really have to worry about school (especially once they realized time dilation was a thing); it’s basically the epitome of the romantic coming-of-age story. (Fun fact: Stand By Me is really culturally influential in Japan.)

02, on the other hand, was an eight-month-long ordeal of having to fight a territory war crammed into the after-hours of school, juggling fighting this war with keeping it from parents, in a fight that would retroactively turn out to be against what would later become a heavily traumatized and beloved friend, plus eventually watching him get subject to even worse trauma. Oh, and the series also ended on witnessing a bunch of deaths (or in other words, the worst New Year’s Eve ever). While it seemed like the kids had the luxury of enjoying the Digital World in ways the Adventure kids couldn’t at first, actually, they didn’t get to enjoy as much of it at all, since they never got to form any lasting relationships with anyone like Gennai or Elecmon. These kids were basically too busy trying to keep each others’ heads on straight to really be able to focus on that.

The comparative mess that the 02 kids went through, and the messes that they kind of are, means that they’re rather dependent on each other for emotional support. This is not inherently a bad thing, mind you; the fact that some people are more independent than others is a simple fact of life, and the 02 kids (whether it’s from naturally being a bit misfit or from the degree of their experiences) being the type who grow together with mutual support isn’t inherently anything bad. It does, however, mean that they’re likely to have some difficulties ahead coming out of 02 as “growing up” conspires to make it more and more difficult for them to stick together -- after all, how many people have actually been able to stick with their elementary school friends all the way into adulthood? This is especially because Japanese high schools admit students by examination, and rank by academic ability; it’s not particularly common for those from the same elementary/middle school to attend the same high school, even if they live close to each other, and it’s very unlikely that all of them will be sticking together in school by that point.

So, how did they fare?

Well, before we get into anything else, we should probably bring up one thing that seems like such a tiny little detail but is actually very important for this: Technology didn’t stagnate at 02′s D-Terminals, and by the time of Kizuna in 2010, smartphones and group chats existed! (Earlier than they did in real life, at that.) This is actually really important because of how much it does for that question of “how to keep in contact when circumstances like school keep you apart” -- especially when the Adventure group would certainly appreciate the method to keep in touch despite their lives largely getting increasingly separate. That, and even more so if other similar technological things like social media existed; there’s a lot of ways to keep in touch despite physical and circumstantial distance.

Of course, they’d been keeping in touch via email since 02, but a group chat is much lower pressure and actively encourages everyone to keep in touch; think about how useful group chats have been for connecting with your own longtime friends. It’s ambiguous whether the 02 group was privy to this particular chat from To Sora given that they were clearly on call for incidents like the Parrotmon one, but it’s also entirely possible that this is a room for The Ones Who Went on That One Adventure in August 1999, especially since they use the Crests as their icons, and the 02 group has their own (let’s be real, they totally would; think about how many Discord servers with overlapping people you might be in right now). This, combined with the fact that the Adventure and 02 groups seem to have formed a sort of recon squad for the increasing number of Digimon incidents in Tokyo, means that there are actually a lot more opportunities to stay involved with each other than ever before!

As it seems, the Adventure group does seem to be rather emotionally close to the point that Taichi is willing to reach out to Yamato simply to dump his emotional troubles about his future career prospects on him (despite them going to very different universities at this point). Yet, at the same time, there’s still a palpable sense of distance going on here, and a depiction of Taichi and Yamato having developed separate social lives and their own friend circles -- Taichi with Morikawa and Nemoto, and Yamato with Abe (their names come from the novel), who are also acquainted with each other enough to talk about career and worry about each other.

When Taichi and Yamato talk over beer, they don’t even have updates on the same people (Yamato has to update Taichi on Sora and Takeru’s status), and ultimately, Yamato comments on their drifting -- saying that it’s a potentially inevitable part of choosing one’s path. It’s not hard to see why he says this; it’s been a recurring theme for them since after the events of Adventure. Sora and Mimi haven’t been around for Digimon incidents lately because of their careers, and it’s highly likely Jou hasn’t either; Koushirou keeps in touch, but our only depictions have been in the range of business and Digimon incidents.

But for the 02 group? Absolutely not.

The Kizuna drama CD has a lot about what the 02 group was doing (and planning to do) during their little “vacation” in New York. In fact, there’s a lot to go on about here:

Daisuke and Takeru show up together even though Iori was allegedly said to be “first” approached, meaning the two of them were basically hanging out anyway.

Daisuke insists on going on a trip that’s about his own personal career with friends -- and not just any friends, but specifically the group of himself, Ken, Miyako, Iori, Takeru, and Hikari. He also wanted his seniors along, but they were too busy -- but it’s pointed out that the other 02 group members aren’t exactly full of free time either, meaning that these five have a special place of importance to Daisuke in his ramen career trip.

Even the Digimon are aware of what the other humans (the ones that aren’t even their partners!) have been up to lately.

Miyako and Hawkmon say that it’s only natural for them to show up when the group is getting together -- i.e. being with this specific company is a fact of life to her, to the point she invents D-3 gate exploitation to be with them.

The group keeps saying “it’s been a while” for periods of time in which it is made pretty obvious it’s actually not a lot of time at all. (Miyako had just left for Spain to the point her coming back elicits an “already?!” kind of reaction, yet that constitutes “a while”, and the most likely very short time between the trip planning and the movie is also apparently “a while”, and it’s very likely that Takeru’s “a while” in greeting Iori may well have not been that long, either.) It really makes you think about how often the people in this group must be meeting up to think that this constitutes “a while”...

Hikari is ready to fight people for denying her the chance to play with Miyako.

Beyond that, they’ve all apparently been regular enough presences in Daisuke’s life for completely offhand comments and actions to have major impacts on his career thoughts.

In the movie itself, Miyako refuses to take on the exact same request that she ultimately gladly participates in with the rest of the 02 group in New York -- presumably, because the fact her friends are there makes it all better.

As it turns out, despite everything -- despite everyone going in completely different directions with their careers, attending different schools (Iori’s still in high school while everyone else is in university!), the 02 group has been maintaining this attitude of going out of their way to hang out with each other, in a sort of “we do it together, or we don’t do it at all” sense. Of course, that’s not to say they’ve all stayed so socially maladjusted that they’ve become completely incapable of making any other friends at all, but there is a very clear, strong preference of them wanting to be in each other’s specific company to the point that they would do ridiculous things to make it work.

So, you might be asking: what’s the trade-off?

Yamato attributes the alienation between the Adventure group to “choosing one’s own path”. Inherently, this is not quite right (nor is the sentiment that “choices are bad” in general), especially considering that Daisuke, Iori, and Hikari already made their choices in path a long time ago, yet are still behaving like this. The question is actually more of priorities; notice that while the older Adventure characters are mainly portrayed in Kizuna as aggressively pursuing career prospects, the 02 characters, despite having their current educational statuses listed in their profiles, simply seem to have this as not an object.

Iori’s still in school uniform; he’s arguably cramming this all between school club obligations. Ken, Miyako, Takeru, and Hikari don’t have their current educational status involved at all, and even though Daisuke’s ramen trip is technically for his future career, he’s also happy to just “play around” about sightseeing (and, again, there’s also no reason he needed to bring his friends for this). Takeru’s working on his novel, but he hasn’t actually decided it’ll be his career yet. It’s not about whether they’ve made choices or not; it’s about the fact they’re going about this remarkably casually to the point where maintaining their relationship with their friends is more important than career. And this extends to the 02 epilogue as well; compared to their seniors’ more prominent history-making careers, the 02 group’s is more low-scale and community-oriented (the only exception being Sora, but even that ties into individual ambition more than anything else, considering that not succeeding her mother is already a pretty big deal in itself).

The take-home

Adventure and 02 are both very well-known for showcasing people with different personalities and goals in life, and celebrating their differences. I think, personally, the difference between the Adventure and 02 groups’ dynamics is also something that reflects on the different ways to live one’s life as well. This is especially something that most of us can probably understand well now that we’re adults looking back at this, especially in light of Kizuna.

There are some of us who really want to do large-scale things in this world, and will need that understanding of the self to get there but may struggle with maintaining consistent friendships on that turbulent path, and have to adapt by managing the different levels of their relationships and learning to get along with different people in different ways. There are some of us who gain happiness more from mutual support with the people around us even if it means not ostensibly achieving as “great” things, and feel most comfortable with a single consistent set of friends. Some of us are in between, or feel elements of both as we try to experiment with things in life (actually, I’m pretty sure that’s probably most of us to some degree).

Think about your own life and future prospects right now, and then think about the friends you may be in touch with, or haven’t been in touch with for a while, or the ones you talk to for different purposes or fulfill different niches in your life. We’re all trying to straddle this balance; there’s no one right way to live.

#digimon #digimon adventure #digimon adventure 02 #digimon adventure last evolution kizuna #kizuna spoilers

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