#Anyways this moment made me realize I do say ''Awesome'' a lot lmao

[shikai-the-storyteller]

Thinking about how people tend to pick up on specific words from other languages they're learning (especially slang) and use it over and over, like Pac saying "Shenanigans" or Fit saying "Fofoca" or Phil (and the rest of the server practically) saying "No Mames."

It just reminds me of my time working with Japanese college students, and how they all suddenly started saying "Awesome!" practically every other sentence one day after hearing me say it + explaining what it meant to them. It still makes my heart melt a bit thinking about it.

[incesthemes]

happy wincest wednesday!! i'm curious about what you think might happen to sam and dean's relationship in a world where they never find john in season one (eg. azazel kidnaps him to take him off the chessboard, he dies on an obscure hunt without lining up the clues well enough for s&d to follow him, etcetera). where would that major lingering question leave them? in terms of wincest, do you think john's death was necessary to "allow" them to act on their codependency, or would his absence push them together regardless?

OK please excuse any typos, i AM writing this with a cast on. anyway HAPPY WINCEST WEDNESDAY!!!!! this is such an awesome prompt, you've definitely got me thinking.

based on my understanding of seasons 1-2, john actually serves more to drive sam and dean apart than being them together, mostly in the way he serves as a symbol for sam and dean's fates, which are diametrically opposed. by pursuing john, they are pursuing the fates given to them, and those fates dictate a retelling of cain and abel: dean is supposed to kill sam, who has become a monster. it's only when they abandon john that they can avoid their destinies—which is why, in season 2, dean is successful at avoiding his fate (for the most part, starting from 2.09), but sam is not. sam, rather, is following a path he believes john would have wanted for him by continuing to hunt (he completely made this up in his head which is still so funny to me), but in reality pursuing the hunt continues to push him down the road azazel wanted for him. and this is why, during their "honeymoon" phase circa 2.10 to 2.17 (and ambiguously continued into 2.20), sam is the one driving most of the conflict, while dean takes an emotional, supportive role to reassure sam that he doesn't have to succumb to fate. dean has, in these episodes, fully abandoned his fate, while sam still clings to it and introduces doubt into dean's mind through his own self-assured convictions. and this is paralleled by dean fully abandoning his father and the duty john saddled him with, and by sam wanting to honor his father by continuing to hunt down azazel (and hunt in general).

and we see this in season 1 as well: every time john makes an appearance in some way, it furthers the plot. and the plot is sam's fate (dean's fate isn't truly introduced until season 2, and so dean exists sort of ambiguously and as a result lacks narrative agency throughout season 1; his decisions make no impact on the story and sam alone drives the plot forward). john is a symbol for azazel, functionally speaking, and azazel is a symbol for sam's fate. john is azazel is destiny. thus why sam and john are so deeply paralleled and intertwined: they all come to reflect the same thing. in this way dean is the true outsider to the conflict pertinent to the story, and he's treated as such throughout the first season. he makes his mark instead by parroting john, by becoming his mouthpiece in his absence. his own individuality is constantly pushed to the side and suppressed until 1.18 allows him to finally move forward into some semblance of personhood, which is what he needs in order to finally defy john in 1.20.

i just realized this is a lot of context and not an actual answer lmao but basically all of this to say, i don't actually think john's death was necessary for their codependency. it took root in them around 1.11, long before they actually "found" john in 1.16. and it was 1.18, an episode which had little to do with john directly, which allowed dean to break out of the mold he had forced himself into. the act of choosing each other, specifically over john (who represents fate), is what allows them to achieve codependency. the moment where they choose to exist in a codependent relationship indeed is one where john is still alive, in the season 1 finale. sam chooses dean over john, in doing so abandoning his fate, and they solidify their deeper connection. it is in fact john's death which causes sam to falter in this conviction because of his desire to honor john's memory (again by just making shit up in his head about his father. i love him), and this decision has massive ramifications throughout the rest of the season.

if, instead, they simply lost john and never found him, i think a lot of the john-generated conflict would have been avoided. and john generates a lot of conflict for someone who shows up in just a handful of episodes, because he is a symbol of destiny for both of his children, pressuring them in equal amounts but in completely different ways. without that pressure looming over their heads, i think pretty much all of the conflict in season 2 could have been avoided: sam wouldn't feel the need to keep hunting azazel despite throwing away his fate and likely wouldn't be so resistant to dean's persuasions; dean wouldn't be torn between duty to his father and duty to his brother; john's memory wouldn't have caused the problems it did in the first half of the season (especially 2.02-2.04). assuming the rest of season 1 played out roughly the same even with john's absence, it would stand to reason that they would still choose their codependency, and they would settle into some kind of fucked-up domestic bliss—probably continuing to hunt small-scale until azazel inevitably forced their hand anyway (tenacious bastard). sam giving up on his revenge quest would settle most of the enduring conflicts in season 2, and sam only doesn't do that because of john's death.

of course, this makes the assumption that abandoning john is still their active choice. i think that's a reasonable assumption to make because they had begun the process of extricating themselves from their father way, way before john ever shows up or before the end of the season where they achieve codependency. for dean this looks like rebellion, defiance against the iron grip john has around him. and for sam this looks like forgiveness, which he steadily accomplishes across season 1. by 1.20 they no longer define themselves by john but by each other, and it's a mere two episodes before they make the final plunge into each other. it has little to do with john and much more to do with themselves and their interactions, their natural conflict and their unique resolutions. giving up on finding dad seemed to already be something dean was working towards by the time john showed his face in 1.16 (he was resistant to pursuing john single-mindedly and preferred to focus on the smaller hunts, both out of deference to john and out of his own desire to save people), and sam's gradual forgiveness of john began as early as 1.08. so really it was specifically his absence that allowed them to come together, because the groundwork for their extrication began without john and it bloomed despite john. he is the axis around which they are turned, but it is the process of overcoming him which allows them to choose each other. they replace their father with their brother (and in 2.03 sam even offers to replace john very, very literally, by "filling the hole" john left behind in dean) and this replacement—literally, as their father and the man who raised them, and figuratively, as the symbol for their destinies—is the foundation of their codependency.

at the same time, this doesn't exactly look at the potential conflicts that would arise with john's absence. there would be little plot movement without him there driving them forward; they would remain stagnant, and that stagnation could disallow the blossoming of their codependency through a lack of choices and decisions. it is of course the deliberate choosing of brother over father which inevitably drives them closer—in 1.11 it's sam choosing to save dean instead of finding john; in 1.16 it's dean choosing to send john away instead of braving the world together; in 1.20 it's sam and dean both standing up to john in equal measures; in 1.21-22, it's sam choosing to let azazel escape. without john exerting pressure on them, sam and dean sit comfortably without moving, together but with a marked distance between them. which was exactly meg's plan in 1.16: they weren't moving fast enough for her liking, so she used john as bait (the three of them were mutually bait for each other, rather) to force them to make decisions.

so it's sort of a double-edged sword. they steadily come together and twist themselves around each other without john there to drive them apart, but at the same time it is john's active presence which allows them to take definitive steps toward their desired state of being (codependency). without the pressure john exerts on the narrative, their progress is slow, and they're too nervous to make those drastic leaps from step to step without some external force pitting them against each other. in that way they're a little too comfortable with each other (a lifetime together will do that for you), and they have to be unavoidably forced out of that comfort in order for them to commit to anything. john is both the driving force for their codependency and the wedge hammered between them, which sums up his narrative role so poetically if you ask me.

so like, tldr (seriously), i think if john went missing and they made the active choice to stop looking for him, they still definitely would have the potential to achieve codependency, but it might take them a much longer time to do so, especially with azazel's meddling (because he, of course, wants them to kill each other—that's their destiny after all). without something to rotate around, they risk stagnation, but it would likely be a comfortable stagnation with steady, if slow, progress toward a better, closer relationship. i wouldn't say the end product would ever be healthy though, because it's clear early on that their ideal relationship with each other is that of codependency, and so they are constantly striving for that end goal. and like, thank god for that, idk what i'd do if they were normal about each other 💦

[sanchoyo]

Hiiiiii, it is I again!! I just finished Cold Love and gosh!

The ending was just so nice, mostly when I thought SHIGGY WAS DYING FOR A MOMENT- 😭 Then they were just being super sweet at the beach and I ngl cried a little, they all deserved that happiness <3 I also still wanna cry (In a good way tho) BECAUSE I FINISHED THE WHOLE THING I wanna write a little note to myself, next to my bed, erase my memories about these 2 fics, then wake up next morning, read the note and reread the whole thing with as much joy as the first time! I'm gonna reread them FOR SURE, but not now as they're still fresh in my brain :3

And you know, Cold Love has opened my mind more than it already was I mean I already love heroes and villains, but you've put a lot more details that made me go: "Shit, I didn't think it was THAT much"

The way you wrote how the hero commission treats heroes made me think of what my parents always tell me about Actors and Models. "Their lives/bodies don't belong to them, it belongs to the company they work for" That sentence hit me even more when the chapters were Hawks centered. Poor guy, he was a literal lab rat. The worst is that he ISN'T THE ONLY ONE GOING THROUGH THAT

Villains, I already sympathized with a lot, in other medias and MHA too But your fic made me realize that, when they do those crimes, it's for them but mostly for OTHERS as well!! They're like heroes, in a way, because they want to make society BETTER. They do this because they know how it feels to be rejected, hated and they want to change it so NO ONE ELSE has to go through this. Also, we often see them not caring about dying if they do achieve their goal, because they know next gens will have better lives than they ever had. WHICH I THINK IS HELLA SAD BUT SO NICE OF THEM???

Though I DON'T agree with them taking lives of course, but I don't hate them anyways because, when they've been rejected by everyone and everything, how else are they supposed to get attention? Very unfortunately, crimes is often their answer…

I think, if I was in MHA, I'd also opt for the Vigilante route. Fuck the hero commission lmao

I won't tell why, but let's just say that I'm more compassionate about villains now <3

ON A MUCH LIGHTER NOTE!! Fanart for Warm Healer is on the way!! So keep an eye open? :3

Fun fact for Cold Love: When Bret asked why Dabi was in the closet, I blurted out: "BECAUSE HE'S GAY!!" Lmao

So yeah, just wanted to say your fics are great! They've inspired me into improving my own fics <3 I even started making my own Shiggy x Reader AND a Dabi x Reader too! Because most of them are smut centered and I don't want just NSFW ya kno?

Anyways, I'm done rambling lol Thanks for writing WH and CL, thanks for inspiring me, thanks for bringing me joy and sorry for rambling that much lmao

Hope you're doing well, lots of love, take care and keep being awesome!!

thank you so much for such a long, sweet message 💗💗💗

I really enjoy bnha fics where the writers closely examine the society and its problems because its SO interesting (and im kind of sad the way it went in canon, I wanted a lot more and found the school setting kind of restricting for it in general, but we'll always have fics haha) i'm glad you enjoyed me doing that just a little bit! (maybe it was kind of weird to include in a romance SI series, but also it would've felt like a huge disservice in my opinion because ALL of the villains stories are influenced by the society they live in and how heroes are treated...)

aaah again, don't feel obligated to do the fanart but if you do, definitely tag me/send it my way, I'd love to see!! 🥺 (also you're writing your own shigaraki/reader and dabi/reader!!! omg!! I hope you have fun making your own!!! they're so fun to write <3 I agree on the wanting more SFW SI fics, sometimes I just wanna go on silly adventures with my favs y'know? :"))

no need to apologize for rambling!! I'm so happy to hear you enjoyed it so much!!! your message made my day ^_^ I hope you have a good day too and your writing/art projects go well!!

[thelediz]

Hello again! sorry I feel like I'm taxing your patience a lot just talking about Manic SORRY

I reflected more on the ask I asked and it opened up another question

What if by chance a villain influenced Manic?

Ok, Manic, even after these terrible questioning choices he made throughout the series, he is still a smart character, the problem is that he lets himself get carried away too much by emotion

which can make him become "easy prey" (which is almost what's happening in your fic) and of course, it depends a lot on the villain

Even though I said that he can be easy prey, at the same time he is not, I'm sorry, I don't want you to understand that he is very stupid and is easily manipulated, for example: manipulation like "your heart doesn't belong on this side, He's always been on this side." I don't think this will work

now, manipulating him by "messing with his ego", maybe it will work, as you said, Manic is very disrespected, which could be an opening for any villain to put the finger on Manic

"But why would a villain want to manipulate a teenager who doesn't seem to have a clue about the things he does?" because of Manic's powers

As I said in the first ask, this power is not for everyone, I have another idea that any villain who comes across these destructive powers will want a piece of it, with these powers, Manic can destroy everything whenever he wants!

the manipulation would be through compliments, which Manic hardly hears, such as "I think you're better than Sonic and Sonia" and over time this will become "You shouldn't be treated that way when you're better than they"

making it clear that I'm not talking as if this villain would turn Manic into a villain, that for me is quite impossible, the idea is that Manic is used for his plans without Manic realizing

I'm not so sure if that would work, maybe it would have a better chance if Manic was in those moments where he believes he's right but obviously isn't, then someone comes in to tell him he is

Now it made me wonder what happens to these thoughts that Manic has that leads him to do shit, he keeps it to himself and pretends it never happened? Does he secretly understand that he made a mistake but refuses to admit it openly? Does he still hold grudges about these things?

anyway, Manic seems like a lost cause, but even after all that, he's still a good person, he's just going down the wrong path (me saying this after having said several bad things about the poor boy lol)

And Aleena and Manic doing shit only this time together? When Aleena does something bad that she believes is a good deed, sometimes I think it runs in the family and has passed down to Manic lmao

I can't wait to read the next chapter. I hope you are having a great day!🩷🩷

Not annoying at all, I think it's awesome! And low-key enabling!

But on a more serious note, I think you have a story you need to write, my friend. Get on that typewriter and tell us this story of fall and redemption!

[yasmindifference]

My favorite fic of yours oh shit, 1st one and I already failed. I'm dead I'm so bad at picking?? I've only read your jaytim fics but I've loved every single one of them. I guess if I have to pick by which one reheated in the microwave the most, then sweet dreams are made of thee!!!! honorable mention to do me a favor because it's the first fic I read from you and has a special place in my meowmeow 4. The best ship you’ve written for: jaytim (?) - I say sarcastically because it's the only one i've read so not like I have much to choose from but I'm sure anything you write would be amazing food I just have a strict diet. 5. A fic I haven’t read yet from you, but I want to: Mug shot? for whatever reason I have it on my tabs and then shit happens and idk it's stayed there but anyway i want to it will be eaten don't worry. 6.Something I remember vividly from reading one of your fics: T-T jay kissing Tim after thinking he was dead and realizing how much he loves him and how much Tim means to him .... and then the kids breaking the moment lmao honorable mention to: "please be food, please be food" 8.What I like the most about your writing: probably that it is exciting and is not like you know what is happening. Your characterization for both Tim and Jay is right up my alley I enjoy their internal monologues a lot; Tim thirsting over jay in "do me a favor" is a great example haha. The way you develop and use both their strengths and weaknesses. Also love that you tell a lot and give a good plot with just enough words, no more and no less. A fic i’m excited for you updating/posting: twelve feet deep *ugly sobbing* is okay yas ;-; , i'll keep sacrificing goats until it happens Something I wish/hope you write: probably any of your tumblr fic titles xD omg all of them were so good you really went off. A fic of yours that i’ve re-read: do me a favor, sweet dreams are made of thee, rooftop proposal, say you'll be mine If i’ve ever shared/talked about your fic to someone else: oh yeah, I always rec your fics to my good friend sturmy :3 she isn't in the jaytim server and technically isn't much in this fandom tho but I always share jaytim fic recs with her and she's liked your stuff A fic I didn’t expect to like so much: just biology. I don't always like ABO fics tbh but this was fantastic, loved your use of scents as pretty much communication. A question I have about one of your fics: no, got nothing just stay an awesome cook

KRIZ!!! this message is so nice, you're too sweet ♡♡♡

so much love for the dreamsharing fic with this meme!! 👀 I had no idea people liked it this much....I guess I should reread and see what all the fuss is about 😂

lmao jaytim is pretty much all I post anyway! (aside from a dicktim I did...that was pure smut tho) I hadn't written in so long but then jaytim grabbed me by the throat and now I can't stop 😂

ohh I didn't know you hadn't read mugs hot! lmao take your time, it's not going anywhere ♡

♡♡♡ I was really proud of that scene, poor Jay was so emotional he needed something to pull him out of it....like a handful of babies who have just discovered shipping and their first otp is red hood/red robin 😂

eeee that's so much nice things to say about my writing 😭 you're too nice ♡♡

twelve feet deep......someday the muse for that fic will come back from war......hopefully your sacrifices speed things along?? 🐐

lmao maybe!! the one with dragon!Jason has some real possibilities, so who knows? ♡

♡♡♡♡♡ rereading and sharing my fics means so much to me, thank you ♡♡♡♡♡

ahh, that's so nice of you to say!! it's very flattering that you're willing to give something you don't always like a try for me 😭 thank you ♡

[olympiansally]

I often think about how in ep 26 Light is just silent and alone. I wonder what he was thinking?? I like to think that he mourned for L and regretted killing him but he pushes all of these thoughts deep down. I just want to hear light go "fuck maybe I shouldn't have killed that bastard- WAIT NO WHAT ARE YOU THINKING STOP THIS IS PERFECT EVERYTHING IS PERFECT"

Hmmmm ok so i do have thoughts lmao

This is actually a very cool topic for me because it goes into Light’s emotional complexities which are great and i can talk about for days lmao

And like basically, I agree, but I agree with lots of thought that might not all be coherent and I went into them deep so beware LMAO

So like, even thought Light is very straight forward with his morality and tends to know what he wants in terms of goals and such, I tend to think that Light doesn’t quite grasp the depth of his feelings most of the time. Partially, that has to do with him dismissing feelings as something that’s bellow him, going as far as to say that “that’s how idiot happen”. So a lot of the time, Light either just goes with the first emotion he senses in him and tries to “fix it” so he doesn’t feel anymore or just tries to ignore them all completely.

This instance you’re talking about fits mostly into the first category I think and we see him basically focus all his energy on a single emotion so he doesn’t feel the rest. So, you might not like it, but I actually don’t think Light was mourning L then. Not yet anyway.

The way Light tends to function with feeling isn’t all that smooth, so when L dies and he starts feeling A LOT, Light just grabs onto something he feels enough of to quiet all the rest, but also not so much that he wouldn’t be able to handle and then hyper focusses on fixing that one emotion he’s now feeling. Which is why I don’t think Light was grieving yet, I doubt he would have allowed himself to even acknowledge that he was feeling any type of grieve or sorrow over L being death right away. I mean, that’s a boy who has to be hit over the head repeatedly with his feelings before he relents and faces them. So in this first moment he has to choose something else to focus on and there’s an emotion that I think he would accept and that is close enough to actual grief that he’d be able to channel all his sorrow into it and try to deal, and that’s LOSS.

So now you’re probably like uhh Lu, isn’t loss pretty much just grief tho??

To which I answer kinda, but also no, making it PERFECT for Light at that moment. He absolutely feels the loss of having killed L (he’ll eventually even grow to regret it, but not yet). But loss isn’t necessarily in the realm of grief and here is where Light pretty much just manipulates himself into feeling AT A LOSS rather then feeling WHAT he lost. And that is a feeing he can totally handle. Up til then he’d directed all his energy towards L, towards their game, towards beating him. So now that that’s done he has no idea what to do next. He is lost as in, without direction in those first moments after L dies, so we have Light wandering around without purpose or motivation because he has no idea what to do next now that L’s gone. In truth I don’t even think Light thought he’d get that far, he probably didn’t think he’d get to kill L (which is another topic that i also have loads to talk about but i’ll refrain or this reply won’t ever end jsjwjajsjsk).

In a way, he mirrors L’s own behavior after he had to accept that Light wasn’t Kira (even thought like, he is) and has to let him out of detainment.

Obviously there’s going to be some lawlight here because, well, I can’t help it lmao. But I think it’s VERY telling and of huge narrative significance how completely aimless they both get when they’re disappointed in each other. It just shows how completely they depend on one another to drive them, to give them purpose.

L gets depressed (as he puts it) when he thinks Light isn’t Kira and therefore isn’t the worthy opponent, the equal, he had thought he was. Similarly, Light gets utterly lost when L dies because he feels like L disappointed him, he was supposed to keep challenging him, but now he’s gone. They both loose all motivation when they feel like the other won’t be able to challenge them anymore and while Light eventually gets L back in the game during the Yotsuba arc, L is now dead and can’t bring back Light’s motivation. So Light desperately looks for something else to motivate him and goes into that whole “perfect world” spiral moment.

At the same time, I think when L died Light just felt A LOT in a way he couldn’t deal with. Not only are there MANY emotions, but they are highly conflicting ones. That is actually very well represented in L’s death scene, as Light jumps to catch him and cradles his body as he dies, but also shifts into that creepy grin as the feeling of victory takes over.

Since Light doesn’t know how to deal with ALL THAT he basically distracts himself with finding new purpose and with building his new world and shelfs his feelings so he can deal with them when he’s ready (and uh he never will be)

I also think that from a more subconscious perspective Light gets that desperate to start seeing his new world and rushes to make it happen because that’s how he deals with the fact the HE killed L. It’s his end that justify the means and he need it badly. The perfect world has to happen because there needs to be a reason, killing L needs to have been worth it (and eventually part of the reason he spirals is because he realises it just wasn’t worth it, from a more ship centric perspective). He sacrificed his only true friend, his equal (his soulmate jskwka) to achieve this goal so it NEEDS to be worth it and to be perfect.

So like that’s how i interpret Light’s actions right after L dies. I think in time the bottled up emotions definitely start to spill over and he starts facing what he did but that takes quite some time. I truly think Light would try to avoid feeling for as long as he possibly could and that he just pours himself into building the new world work at first. But the more he works on it, the more he realizes that he wanted L to see it too, wanted the only person who understood him to also understand WHY he was doing all he did. And the more he realizes he can’t have that, that L will never see it, that he’ll never know and that he’s actually GONE, the more Light himself starts to slip and take risks until he eventually loses. Because the truth is that Light refuses to grief L so bad that he becomes haunted by his memory and weighted by guilt.

So no, I don’t think that Light was mourning and regretting in episode 26, but he absolutely SHOULD have been. To me, personally, the fact that he refuses to and suppresses his feelings is what eventually puts him in the state of mind that makes him lose, because his attempts at winning become desperate. It stops being that he wants to win and it starts being about how he has to, how he feels that if he fails, then he killed L for nothing, which he absolutely cannot face. I think he only truly starts to mourn L and to regret killing him once he starts getting bored and lonely, when he notices that building his new world without L to oppose him feels more like a chore then the excitement he had with L and in the end he truly regrets because he understands that without L it just isn’t worth it. So like, in a way, his refusal to mourn L is what makes him unhinged enough to make mistakes and lose.

Oooff that was a lot kajwkajwja

But like you made me THINK so there it is

I also wanted to say that I love the way this fandom does asks, i mean these comments that get us rambling and analyzing things in length are very much awesome, so thanks!!!

If you can’t tell I had a lot of fun rambling about these boys so feel free to ask more stuff anytime 🥰

[heathneycanon]

reasons why phobia factor fucking slaps

ok this lowkey just turned into me rambling abt phobia factor while i rewatched it. putting it under a read more bc it’s super long lmao

like, the entire first five minutes are the campers being friendly to each other?? and vulnerable, to a degree??? you know i love that shit

courtney and trent?? talk to each other?? like. okay they’re never in the same frame together unfortunately, but they do have like, two whole back and forth conversations.

also in that campfire scene at the beginning, cody and trent are sitting next to each other and there are some. good screencaps

“exSQUEEZE me?!” like cody. ur such a dork omfg

duncan vulnerability hours

lindsay asks what a standee is and trent explains it and doesn’t mock her/isn’t annoyed with her at all, in contrast to a lot of the other campers interacting with lindsay. i love them as friends SO much u all have no idea

harold’s little scene with the ninjas. i love him sm. why does he have nunchucks with him when he goes to the bathroom??

leshawna is afraid of spiders and she runs away screaming from. chef wearing a spider suit??? like i don’t love spiders but if a man i knew wearing a spider costume was calmly walking toward me i wouldn’t react the same way as i would to a real spider. anyway i think this is hilarious.

season one heather vulnerability hours.....

i mean, i really wish they’d actually shown her talking abt her fear at the campfire, rather than just having it told by gwen in the confessional, but i get why they did that. regardless that one scene right before the sumo wrestler charges at her where she’s literally shaking.... i want to give her a hug

side note i hope the sumo wrestler is okay he hit his head quite a few times

ok so. trent accidentally leaving gwen buried underground because he’s getting chased by a mime isn’t like. a sweet gwent moment. but it is one of their interactions that i remember most vividly from tdi lmfao

what is a cute gwent moment is trent like. kneeling next to her while chris is burying her. and the face he makes at chris when he jokes abt not digging her up..... i love them sm

also gwen sounds so fucking dramatic when they close the box she’s in like. “goodbye cruel world” gwen ur being buried for 5 minutes ur not dying sdfjlafskj i love her

duncan hyping dj up before he picks up the snake is so cute?? like he’s clapping for him and he’s got what i call “adorable duncan face” which is where his eyes are full circles and he’s smiling. i can remember him making this face at courtney, dj, and alejandro throughout the series and it’s just. ugh loving soft duncan hours

“ah! it blinked” “it means she likes you” sadie where are u getting this information

okay so i googled if this was true and the result i got was “snakes can’t blink” so first of all i have no clue where sadie pulled that fact from and i have even less of an idea of where chris got that fucking. blinking snake from. is that even a snake??

when dj picks up the snake and they all hype him up?????? i love the killer bass so much it’s unreal

more cute gwent moments... gwen and trent talking on the walkie talkies.. they’re so cute

when the mime pops up behind trent and he does that little scream.... it’s loving trent hours u guys

trent is so bothered by a mime literally just. being a mime. me too trent. me too.

duncan and the celine dion music store standee.... everything abt that scene

"DUDE SHE’S MADE OF CARDBOARD” tyler i love you

courtney genuinely saying that it’s okay if he can’t do it (when she was being harsh to dj about the snake earlier..... duncney is so good in tdi u guys)

and then theY HOLD HANDS GUYSSSS IM SOFT FOR THEM

and THAT is what gives duncan the encouragement he needs to go for it?? they’re so good.

his “okay, okay” right before going for it... duncan’s voice acting is so good in this episode omfg

THE MUSIC THAT PLAYS WHEN HE HUGS THE STANDEE AND THEN EVERYONE CHEERING ITS SUCH A GOOD SCENE

THE DUNCNEY HUG

“duncan, you’re awesome!” and the look of shock on his face at both the fact that he did it and that courtney’s hugging him...... have i mentioned i love duncney yet?? bc i do

i can’t believe i used to dislike duncney omfg

then when courtney realizes that she’s hugging him and steps back jafksdfjlsa she’s so cute

and then the rest of the bass come over and hype duncan up more like. i love how supportive they all are in this episode!!

trent is so excited when he finally gets the mime to leave him alone fakjldjfl like he didn’t have to ROAST the dude. but he did.

chris somehow owns a remote control hail cloud?

lindsay getting excited about the “baby cloud” and calling it over?? she’s so cute omfg

trent fucking. hates geoff. gwent has geoffphobia in tdi ig

when they dig up gwen and she throws the walkie talkie at his head but he doesn’t stop smiling..... your honor i love them

owen and izzy getting out of the plane and kissing the ground together..... adorable.

cody with a fucking. watermelon on his head and covered in trash scares bridgette out of the woods. that will never not be funny to me

THAT ONE FUCKING SCENE. WHERE SADIE AND LINDSAY HYPE EACH OTHER UP. THAT MAY BE ONE OF MY FAVORITE SCENES IN THE ENTIRE SERIES. I LOVE THEM SM

the only bad thing abt this ep- tyler should have gotten the fucking point. he completed the challenge. i love courtney, but realistically, she should have gone home this ep and tyler should have stayed.

bridgette hyping tyler up...... im soft they should be friends

“quit being such a girl” courtney im sorry but the only reason you’re still in the game rn is because ezekiel made sexist comments in episode one. what are u saying lmfao

tyler and heather’s reactions to their fears rly make me think. bc like. most of the other campers have a more outward, loud reaction, maybe scream and run away. a couple are just a little wigged out. gwen gets a little snippy and is clearly super freaked out as well. but tyler and heather just. completely shut down. like, curled up in a ball, nonverbal, and shaking. makes u think.

why did cody need a calculator to figure out that the score was 7/3....... cody is canon lgbt+ bc he can’t do basic math without a calculator confirmed

also regardless of how little sense that made. at least that screencap gave us commie cody

when gwen starts trying to psych courtney out and heather like. gasps and looks shocked..... i like to think that heather feels a little bad for courtney here. heathney real.

duncan and bridgette hyping courtney up..... i love the killer bass so much omfg

courtney looks so sad when she walks away from the jelly.......

and then in the confessional right after?? she’s like. crying a little bit :( and she’s beating herself up abt it like..... :( courtney no

LITERALLY she’s like “how could i be so weak” “i deserve to go home” “you’re pathetic” (to herself) and then tells herself to show some confidence and then. she just starts crying again. and then slaps herself?? GOD I FUCKING LOVE COURTNEY SHE’S SO HARD ON HERSELF

owen just. hangin out in the tub of jelly. i love u, u wild dude. fuckin sit in that green jelly. loving owen hours

the little look that courtney and tyler give each other when they’re the last two without marshmallows..... half solidarity half “i don’t want to be the one going home”. i love them sm :(

i KNOW i said this earlier but. tyler should NOT have gone home this episode!!!!!! only bad thing abt this ep

all the fuckin chicken puns are a little bit funny tho

“he won’t be flying high tonight” bridgette chickens can’t fly

when courtney goes “okay, that’s enough” like. tyler’s not even there at this point but she’s defending him. maybe it’s because she still feels she should have gone home instead? maybe it’s because of that little bit of solidarity she felt for him when they were the final two without a marshmallow? maybe i’m reading too much into this? but idk. i think it’s sweet

okay no i have another complaint. what the fuck was the whole boat ride for tyler?? like when sadie gets eliminated the surprise she gets is that katie is on the boat. when tyler is on the boat, CRYING, after literally none of his teammates came to see him off, after he LITERALLY COMPLETED THE CHALLENGE BUT DIDN’T GET CREDIT FOR IT. the fucking. CHICKENS POP OUT?????? tyler deserved better

also some of the challenges were a lot easier, or at the very least, harder to fail than others this ep. i love it but come on. lindsay and sadie vs like. gwen vs owen and izzy vs dj. there were very different time limits, actual fright level, ability to back out once they were doing the challenge.... not a fair challenge

also uhm. if we’re being technical tyler and heather had the exact same reaction to their fears, so why did heather get a point and tyler didn’t? if the chicken had run at him, would he have won? smh

i do love this episode so much but. i had a couple complaints

okay finally lindsay’s little confessional to tyler where she blows him a kiss.... they’re so adorable lyler rights!!

[uwuch9n]

hey person !! today i'll be writing some 2AM sugawara fluff because i'm bored and not tired :D hope u enjoy reading !

characters: sugawara & nb y/n (self insert or oc)

warnings or possible triggers: hands are touched, making out, neck being grabbed (not aggressively!!,) suga and y/n both tear up, goosebumps, a confession, & hugging ! please do not continue reading if any of these things could trigger any unwanted reactions ! maybe the next time i write some fluff or sfw fanfics you’ll be able to read ‘em !

picnic date after practice.

you watch sugawara, asahi, and daichi all laughing and messing around after practice, while kageyama and hinata do their gay little thing. you've been watching them play for the longest time, cheering them on in the crowd, and now that you're in the official karasuno volleyball team, you can't even believe how pretty sugawara actually is up close. or how good they cooperate in the team, that too. sugawara caught your attention the most though, and you knew exactly what it was. his beautiful smile and his soothing voice. though he's never actually talked to you as anything more than a teammate, you felt as though he was just.. special.

of all the boys in the volleyball team, or even in the entirety of karasuno, sugawara was the one you really would like to know the most.

that's when you finally snap out of your little fantasy world and realize that THE sugawara is walking up to you with the biggest smile. you start to tense up, obviously. you've been crushing on him since when..? ever since you saw him? yeah.

"hey there y/n ! i got a question for you, if you don't mind taking a few minutes to talk!" he says enthusiastically. woah. sugawara knows your name and wants to talk to you. SUGAWARA. WANTS. TO. TALK. TO. YOU. and he knows your name.

"wh- yeah sure i've got all day! what's up?" you say acting like this was totally cool with you and you totally weren't just thinking about him. his smile doesn't leave his face, in fact it only grows bigger. he seemed glad that you were free all day. you just didn't know why he was so happy about it.

"awesome ! well i was trying to reach you yesterday but i guess you aren't the type to pick up random numbers are you," he giggled, "i should've messaged you instead... but anyway! i wanted to talk to you about your blocking.. it's really impressive. and i just wanted to say that for a new addition to our team, you really are very skilled. and im so proud of you for that y/n! but im getting off track here aren't i.." he rambled on and on about how impressed he was by you and how he wanted to get to know you better. you sat there flustered and shocked, but still willing to listen to every compliment he threw at you.

his rambling continued and you are able to understand all of it, but then you hear him ask you... a very WATTPAD-ESQUE question.

"i was wondering if maybe you wanted to go on a little picnic date with me so that we could talk about the team.. or if you'd like, talk about each other! whatever you want, i'll make sure to make it happen and-" you cut him off. "MHM! let's totally do it!! i'm so down !! SO PUMPED !! woohOOO! i would love that !!" you blabber out excitedly.

"awe great! when would you like to go? like in a few minutes?? maybe tomorrow? i mean we could go get dressed at home and then bring all the supplies and stuff and meet up at a park if you're fine with it! i'll send you the address of my favorite park.. here lemme just..."he proposed while reaching for his phone. you nod in agreement and both of you exchange numbers, giving each other nicknames in the contact list.

fast forward; you two are already at the park, setting up the picnic spot. (i know im lazy im sorryy)

"alright doll, would you mind bringing over the food basket i set up for us? it's right- yeah right there!" he giggled as you quickly pointed at where it was while he was mid-sentence. he brushed off any unnecessary leaves and dirt on the picnic blanket, and sat down, moving around the food items and snacks to make the setup look cuter and more enjoyable. you finally finish bringing over all the snacks you brought from home and set them down, organizing them alongside suga.

"is that a separate bowl of konpeitō??!" you ask shocked. it was your personal favorite candy and you were curious to know how HE knew that. "yeah it is! i love konpeitō a lot so i brought some for us to share, it's my favorite candy." he replied while scratching his head. "no way! it's my favorite candy too! that's cool!!" you say very hyped. you both giggle and talk about how you two were feeling. things like "how was your week?" and "did you enjoy practice?" were probably the first few questions of the bunch.

of course, the conversation didn't stay dry, and you two talk about lots of things, ranging from why your favorite song was actually a meme song to why sugawara doesn't like to share his snacks with daichi because he eats them all.

you both enjoyed the delicious konpeitō, nommed on some homemade suga-sandwiches, and sipped on fruit punch flavored juice happily while talking about how cute the ducks at the park were.

then sugawara's curiosity kicked in.

"hey doll, i think you already know what i saved you as in my phone, but i never found out what you saved me as.. is it alright if you tell me?" he asked suddenly. he was itching to know what you decided to call him. this was very important to sugawara and you could tell, so you quickly followed up. "i got you saved as suga-bear with a white heart next to it!" you said, smiling gently. he blushed a bit from how calm you said it. your smile made his mind go blank.

"that's.. adorable y/n.. that's so cute..." he lets out after finally finding out how to breathe again. you look away, clearly blushing because of how cute he looked while saying that. he finally mustered up the courage to caress your soft tender hand, squeezing it, not too tightly, and then slowly redirecting his hand to your warm, rosy cheek.

"y/n, honestly.. if i didn't ask you on this date would i have even known how incredibly cute you actually were?" he said as he looked deeply into your eyes, getting lost in them by each passing second. your thoughts raced as his warm hand rested against your left cheek and the wind slowly hit your back. you could hear your heart beating much faster than before. it was a very tense yet relaxing moment.

before you could even respond to his rhetorical question, he leaned in and slowly kissed your lips, his tongue accidentally slipping in. neither of you regretted it though. you kissed back; and for a short moment, your mind went blank. you could feel both his hands moving towards your neck and shoulders. he grabbed your neck gently and only fell into a deeper kiss than when his lips first met yours. his fingers wrapped around your neck and even just the feeling of it gave you goosebumps.

"i don't know if it's too soon to even say this but it's just... it feels right to." he says as he pulled away from the kiss. "doll..." he sighed. "i love you.. and im not holding back from saying that because i know that if we spend even just one more minute together i'll already want to give you the world and all of the universes on a silver platter." he confessed.

you couldn't even believe what was happening. i mean, the kiss alone was enough to make you pass out and yet here you were listening to your crush of 3 years confess his love to you at a cute picnic date.

"i... i love you a lot. im not just saying that because we're here on a little picnic date and i'm not saying it with hopes to make you feel better or give you false hope. i truly feel like you just.. make me feel even more comfortable being myself. even if it was just a short picnic date, even if we played together once or twice during practice, even if this is our first time actually having a full-on conversation. i really do love you... so so much.." you could see a tear rolling down his cheek as he mouthed "thank you" and kissed your cheek.

he went in for a hug and moved his hands and arms up and down against your back. he laughed off his tears while still rubbing your back, and pulled away to wipe his tears. you could tell he wasn't joking about it and that made you get a little emotional too. he grabbed your face and kissed your forehead, then your nose, and lastly, a small peck on the lips.

"suga... i didn't know you felt the same way i did.." you said, reassuring him that you loved him just as much. he laughed through his tears and then sniffed. you could see how he was quickly getting much more comfortable with you.

"i always have... it's just now i'm able to actually tell you about it.. yknow?" he laughed. he intertwined his fingers with yours and tightly held your hands, putting them both close to his face and gently planting kisses on them. both of you looked into each other's eyes and leaned in for a final kiss while the sun was setting.

from the second you saw him, to the moment you two kissed, you knew suga was the one.

that’s all ! i hope you enjoyed this self insert x suga fluff fanfic ! i can't even tell if this one's good or not, but that's because i wrote this at like 2AM and i'm just posting it now because of the lil mistakes lmao. i dont rlly expect this to do any good, just a random fluff i wrote :,)

[kaediisarchive]

Final thoughts on the 2021 Mortal Kombat movie.

LOTS of spoilers under the cut! Do not look at this post if you don’t want to see spoilers!

And remember, this is all just my opinion. It’s not like an actual in-depth review because I’m not a film student; this is just my perspective on what I saw as a fan of this franchise.

POSITIVE

Sub-Zero and Scorpion were great. Opening fight was great.

“Eddy Tobias” namedrop lmao

I love the snow preceding Sub-Zero’s attack. Very foreboding.

Score is AWESOME. My favorite soundtrack is probably the one that plays when Sub-Zero is attacking them in the city towards the beginning.

Sonya rigging her house with a secret bunker and trap doors is smart and fits her character.

I like that the dragon logo has an integral meaning to the story.

Loved Jax vs Sub-Zero. Not mad about the origin change of Jax’s arms. I like that he had to work through his feelings of inadequacy and failure; people don’t just immediately bounce back after something that traumatic. I also like that his arcana manifests to protect Sonya rather than in the heat of battle. It shows his emotional priorities and what separates him from people like Kano who manifest their arcana in a fit of rage.

Sonya “Throw Hands on Sight” Blade lmfao. They nailed her fighting style too and I am happy.

Kano is the best thing about this movie. No competition.

Kotal reference!

Nightwolf reference!

Shang Tsung’s soul magic being black and wispy and foreshadowing Noob Saibot.

KANO DID THE HEART RIP

CHEKOV’S GNOME I’M SCREAAAAAAMMMMIIIIIINNNNGGGGGG

I love Liu Kang in this. He is 1000000% a Wholesome Boi. I like that he’s younger and unhardened and not the fully realized champion version of his character yet. Let him grow into it so it feels earned later on. I like that he’s the underdog, and I like what they’ve set up for him in the future. Also, the casting for him was perfect and they nailed his fighting style, too.

That little “the FUCK” that the Kano actor improvised(?) in the middle of Liu Kang’s lines made me laugh more than it should have. I don’t know why that moment got to me so much but it did.

I love Kung Lao. And they nailed his fighting style, too! Great to see variation that represents the characters (though there were less shining examples, which I’ll touch on later).

LOW SWEEP! LOW SWEEP! LOW SWEEP!

Egg roll scene is best scene.

Kabal! I love his dry humor. And his voice reminds me of Duke Nukem, which I’m not mad about. It complemented his dialogue well.

Not mad about Kung Lao’s death because it was meaningful. His fatality on Nitara was sick, too.

Liu Kang taking the ribbon from Kung Lao’s hat and wearing it in his honor, giving an origin for his signature headband is FANTASTIC.

THE PIT!

FLYING BICYCLE KICKS!

LIU KANG’S DRAGON FATALITY!

SONYA’S ENERGY RINGS!

Sub-Zero was a GREAT final boss. They really built him up appropriately to make him feel like it.

Scorpion’s fatality! And his skull face!

NEUTRAL

Not sure how I feel about Sub-Zero being wholly evil and there being no involvement from Quan Chi. It’s more straight forward for sure. It makes him an interesting (and badass) character, and I’m really behind this portrayal in that he is one of the most believable characters in the movie, but I’m not sure if I like the implications for later films in how this has simplified the dynamic in the entire Shirai Ryu vs Lin Kuei plotline. Having Quan Chi be the Machiavelli was always one of my favorite MK twists. And how do we eventually end the feud now? If Bi-Han / the Lin Kuei were wholly responsible, why should Hanzo EVER make peace with Kuai Liang down the line? The complexity feels like it’s been stripped down a bit, but I do love this iteration of Sub-Zero. I truly do. That’s why this is in the neutral category and not the negative XD.

Why didn’t Jax tell Cole when he saw the mark? Why wait until his family gets attacked? Maybe he didn’t want to do it in front of his family to keep them out of it, but that ends up endangering them more. Not a gripe, just a curiosity.

Sound editing was a bit too intense at times for my taste. I have tinnitus, so...big boomy bass with very mild voices is a chore for my ears to switch between. My ears were ringing within the first twelve minutes.

Torn between “fuck you Reiko” and “Reiko deserved better”. He deserved just a little bit better, but Skarlet says “get fucked” anyway.

I don’t like the “shaky cam” used in the fight scenes. Not my cup of tea. Very hard to visually process at times.

Whatever cosmic force is picking the champions for Earthrealm is doing a shitty job at it.

Why did they change the location of the Sky Temple to a desert? Again, not a gripe, a curiosity.

“We will not see another full moon before the tournament begins” THEN WHERE IS THE TOURNAMENT BUDDY???

Not sure how I feel about the “arcana” concept. It’s an okay plot device but kinda hammy.

Kitana’s fan! But why? Why is it there? I could understand the Kotal and Nightwolf references because Sonya has been researching, but why is Kitana’s fan randomly in an Earthrealm temple? Purely cheap fanservice.

Nitara was really cool. Shame she had to die, but her death was cool and there have to be some characters that get killed off. Wish she had more screentime though; feels like another instance of fanservice just having her show up basically as a namedrop and a quick kill.

The phrase “Are you okay?” was said WAY too much in this film. So much that I actually notices how often it was said, and I usually don’t pick up on these things.

Pretty sure a camera operator fell at one point in a Sonya scene because the camera jerked around violently all of the sudden then stabilized. Whoops.

How did Sub-Zero know to take Cole’s family to the gym? WHY did he take them there?

NEGATIVE

Opening scene was awesome, but it’s emotional impact felt stunted. I feel like the order of events should have been twisted a bit. Hanzo find his wife and son should have been the big emotional climax of the scene, but it felt like a passing moment and gave him no time to mourn and no time for the impact to truly set in with me. It was an “oh no they died” moment instead of an “ OH MY GOD THEY DIED THIS IS SO FUCKED FUCK YOU SUB-ZERO” moment. I dare say that the Legacy web series did it better in spite of their lower budget and overall quality; the series of events had better pacing and gave more emotional impact because of it. I said what I fucking said don’t @ me.

Wish we got more Scorpion. I love Sanada, I love him as Scorpion, but they didn’t give us the time we needed with his character to truly get a grasp of him.

Cole Young is like white bread in a parade of decorative cakes.

Raiden, a normally passionate and protective character whose fatal flaw is that he involves himself too much in events because he cares about the people in his realm and ends up fucking things up because of it, now seems to not care in the slightest. He feels completely uninvolved save for an occasional pop in to give a nod of disapproval. I don’t like this unemotional take on one of the most emotional characters in Mortal Kombat.

Small complaint from my perspective as a martial artist but uh...”Throw your uppercut!” was a bullshit line in a bullshit scene. If you’re locked up with someone like that and the guy has his arms around your neck, you physically cannot uppercut. You cannot fit your arms between his arms because they are cinched tightly around your shoulders/neck. YOUR HEAD is between your fist + bicep and HIS HEAD. In that situation, the guy has also left his body completely unguarded, so the most logical thing to do since you CANNOT reach his head is to go for BODY BLOWS. Beat him until he lets go to protect himself, catch his floating rib with double strikes, or punch the dude in his fucking liver as hard as you can to DROP HIM. Cole is supposed to be an experienced fighter, yet he makes one of the most rookie mistakes a fighter could ever make. Normally I wouldn’t care to point out mistakes in fight choreography or whatever because it’s MK and I expect ridiculousness, but this is the WRONG kind of ridiculous. It’s just NONSENSE.

I have SO MANY issues with Mileena. I’ll make this as short as I can. I don’t like the design of her mouth. I don’t like her weird stacked voice. She shows NO personality, not in her acting or even her fighting style, just an evil minion that got angry because she almost got her ass kicked. The turned one of the principle characters of the entire franchise and a fan favorite into a GRUNT. There is NO mention of Kitana outside of literal “fan”-service. Not even a reference to one of the most important plotlines in all of Mortal Kombat. And then they KILL HER OFF!!! When they do inevitably bring in Kitana WHAT THE FUCK ARE THEY GOING TO DO SINCE THEY KILLED OFF MILEENA???? I’m heated and biased and they did my girl dirty.

Speaking of doing characters dirty, poor Reptile. They turned him into an actual animal. What a waste.

Why are they so mean to Sonya if she doesn’t have a mark? She wouldn’t be as much of a “liability” if they would take the time to prepare her and teach her how to defend against fighters that have unlocked their arcana. Mind-numbingly stupid logic.

This movie relies A LOT on prerequisite knowledge to work. It’s like they want fans to fill in the blanks for them. But not everyone watching is already a fan; this isn’t an obscure release, this is a blockbuster movie released worldwide. These gaps in lore and prior knowledge don’t make sense for such a broad audience.

Cole Young literally could have just been Johnny Cage.

Where was Raiden when his temple was being assaulted?

Cole’s arcana is LITERAL PLOT ARMOR IM FUCKING DONE

No but for real that’s the most boring decision they just ripped off Jax’s MK11 heater effect and Baraka’s blades (I know they’re tonfa and they aren’t attached and I DON’T CARE). Also, now he’s suddenly good at fighting again? After being dog shit this entire movie??? And tanks Goro?????

If Raiden is an Elder God in this continuity, why is he allowed to help Earthrealm AT ALL? It seems like favoritism and bends the rules that the Elder Gods are supposedly bound by way too much. They really just shouldn’t have made him an Elder God; I honestly think they just said it to introduce the concept without a fuck given towards the actual lore of the Elder Gods.

WHY DID RAIDEN TELEPORT KANO TO SONYA’S HOUSE AFTER HE BETRAYED THEM I HAD TO REWATCH THAT SEVERAL TIMES TO MAKE SURE I JUST SAW WHAT I SAW  WHAT THE ACTUAL NONSENSICAL FUCK

Cole REALLY should not have been involved in that last fight. Especially not after Scorpion shows up. It should have been Scorpion vs Sub-Zero ONLY for the final fight. Cole tag-teaming Sub-Zero with Scorpion cheapens Scorpion’s revenge.

Camera work in the final fight was not good, especially in the first portion. At one point Cole gets thrown into a fence, but it cuts to an awkward inverse angle that makes him look like he’s bouncing off of a trampoline. This continues to happen and ruins several shots for me.

Honestly Scorpion should have just possessed Cole. Permanently. No switching back and forth. No more Cole, only Scorpion.

PREDICTIONS

Lots of dead characters come back as revenants and / or with upgrades.

Kano comes back with cyber eye.

Mileena comes back with full teeth.

Liu Kang becomes MK champion, wins tournament, and kills Shang Tsung. As it should be.

Cole Young helps Liu Kang become champion somehow idk maybe he sacrifices himself or something just please don’t make Cole the champion I will start a riot.

Next movie will start IMMEDIATELY at the tournament since there was supposedly less than a month until the tournament starts in this movie.

New characters coming in will be Kitana, Shao Kahn, Jade, Quan Chi, Kuai Liang, Noob Saibot, Ermac, and Johnny Cage.

OVERALL

This movie was good, bloody fun! It’s not an A++ Oscar-winner, but if you expected that going into it, you played yourself. It was Mortal Kombat; it was stupid, it was gory, and I had a blast watching it. Kano and Liu Kang were the best parts of the movie for me, with Scorpion and Sub-Zero tied for third. Also I popped a lot for the cheap nostalgia hits. I’m overall satisfied with what we got in spite of my complaints, and I only complain so in-depth about the things I love lmao so trust me when I say I’m not actually mad, just nitpicky. I’ve watched it twice now, and I would watch it again. It’s like a 6.8/10 for me.

[connan-l]

All right, so now that I finally digested the final a little I have some random messy thoughts about Fruits Basket 2019. It got really long lol, but this has been stuck in my head for a while so I needed to get it out!

Honestly, it was a very good adaptation and I’m still in awe I was able able to see the whole manga animated. Fruits Basket is pretty important to me, as I read it for the first time when I was around twelve and it was definitely one of the series that impacted me the most — the way it tackles themes of cycle of abuse, loneliness, grief and moving forward still feel very special to me even now (I briefly wrote a post about it months ago after rereading the manga), so of course I was delighted upon hearing the reboot announced and for the most part, it didn’t disappoint. I’d never truly thought I’d be able to see characters like Rin or Machi actually move on screen in my lifetime so in a way it still feel surreal lmao (RIP to Komaki though). It was really refreshing to revisit the story in that way, especially given amusingly enough I am myself in the middle of some big changes in my life where I have to leave things behind so it felt sort of... well, I won’t say empowering per se, but quite encouraging and satisfying to watch Furuba, and especially its final, at this timing, in a way. It wasn’t perfect, there are certainly a lot of flawed directive choices that I question and unfortunately quite some important cut contents — but even at its lowest it stayed all in all good. I’m genuinely a bit stunned there are people who thinks the entire thing is worthless or a failure, because man, I have seen what a bad anime adaptation looks like, and Fruits Basket 2019 definitely isn’t one. Natsuki Takaya herself was clearly very invested and satisfied in that adaptation — I mean, just the fact she drew arts for every single episodes or for the season 3 ending really shows that I think. And while there’s a part of me who will always have a soft spot for the 2001 anime, there’s no contest that the 2019 one is the superior one and more representative of the original manga as a whole.

I believe some people really don’t realize how... uncommon it is to get such a consistently good-looking and complete anime adaptation for a shojo manga? Shojo really aren’t lucky in that prospect usually; they rarely get animated, and when they do they’re usually very bland or outright bad, or they get one short season of like 13 episodes that never receive any follow-ups — even shojo considered like classics tend to get poor treatment, unless they’re Sailor Moon of course or a long-running magical girls franchise like Precure (and even then we could have a discussion about the way Sailor Moon’s treated compared to say Dragon Ball for example, but that’s another topic entirely). So yeah it is quite awesome we were able to get this kind of anime adaptation that covers the full manga with good quality from start to finish, and I am so, so glad it exists and that it managed to revive and makes the series so popular again. (Hopefully its success means we’ll be able to get more good anime adaptation of shojo manga from now on!)

But yeah, that doesn’t mean there wasn’t problems with it and I also understand why some of the manga fans had issues. We were kind of hyped with the fact this would be a complete adaptation and in the end we only got a... sort-of-complete one lol. The art and animation stayed fine during the run (there certainly were some episodes that were uhhh, lacking in that sense, but that’s just how it is sometimes with productions and budget), but I admit I was a bit letdown regarding the direction, where it often seemed… a bit uncreative or heavy-handed. There was some very beautiful and smart shots here and there, but on the whole I really had an issue with the adaptation failing to actually take more ambitious decisions on its visual aspect, especially compared to the pretty pannelling of the manga — and when it did take these decisions it just was… kind of obnoxious and in-your-face, like the show is trying to hold the watcher’s hand (with unnecessary things like Kyo’s father record player derailing or the whole big ropes symbolizing the curse that often slapped you all over the screen, which usually just made me want to roll my eyes because of how annoying it felt.) Multiple people also pointed out the overdramatization of some scenes like the Kyo and Tohru’s confrontation at the end of season 1 or Akito and Ren’s fight which was, indeed, not very good and a weird choice. Fruits Basket is already a pretty dramatic show and these scenes are already intense, there was no need for such over-the-top theatrical display of emotions that only made them comes off as comedic. I’m probably nitpicking here but it also bothered me some characters’ expressions didn’t feel properly retranscribed (Shigure especially, whose characterization depends a lot on that, really suffered from this), or that odd habit of making some big panorama plans instead of focusing on the faces and bodies, which particularly sucks during emotional scenes (like the backgrounds were pretty I guess, but that’s not what was important here lmao).

Also that might be just a personal thing, but can I point out that the openings were pretty disappointing to me... They're not bad, but they all looked so... bland. The songs are fine but the rest feel so uninspired and it's kind of sad... I dunno, I wasn't asking for much but I just think they could've done more than just scrolling each character looking vaguely melancholic or making them walk randomly one after another :/ The endings have at least pretty illustrations and I'm okay with them (I liked what they did with Kyoko’s photo in season 3 too), but the OPs kind of feel as if they ran out of budget and ideas for them or something. I kind of feel the same with the OST as well, where they’re generally fine but were a bit lackluster, and sometimes… they were kind of played at bad times? I remember the Rin episode in season 2 were the music felt a bit out of place and took me out of the immersion, which is a shame cause it was otherwise a pretty good episode. But that might just be a me-thing here lol. The voice actors were awesome though! (The Japanese ones, at least, I didn’t watch any other dubs). I’ve said it before but special kudos to Maaya Sakamoto cause damn she’s so perfect as Akito, and Shimazaki as Yuki and Toyosaki as Rin truly delivered too. I didn’t know Manaka Iwami at all but I was really impressed by her Tohru, especially in season 3 — she really was good at capturing her character’s subtle emotional turmoils (I think she makes a better Tohru than Yui Horie too, although I admit I missed Horie a little lol.)

Anyway, on the topic of lack of ambition, that might be an unpopular opinion but there’s also the fact that I’m sad they didn’t actually... try to change or add more original scenes. By which I mean, obviously we had some changes, but not ones that were really interesting (when they’re not actively detrimental to the story). For example, I was really hoping that we’d be able to get at least one original episode focused on Ritsu (and Mitsuru too why not) in season 2 or 3, or on Kagura or Kisa; I dunno, it would’ve been a good occasion to give something more to the characters that got sidelined in the original manga, or add some moments that would’ve been nice to develop like about Akito post-cliff confrontation, but we never got that. And well, that makes sense now that we know they seemingly had an episode restriction (at least on season 3), but, yeah, that’s still a shame. Honestly in the end Ritsu’s character made even less sense in the anime, because like, it was nice they tried to adapt his introduction episode so that it feels less “you have to adapt to gender norms to feel better about yourself,” (the gender non-confirmity is definitely one of the bits that aged the less well in FB) but then they still made him cut off his hair and give his feminine clothes to Kagura at the end so why lol. (And speaking of his episode introduction, I dislike that they cut off his conversation with Tohru after the suicide attempt, not only for Ritsu but also for Tohru cause it is one of the small instances bringing up her issues that is set up early on and that is crucial to her, but I’ll come back to this later.)

And now about the biggest problem to me being, the cut content and episodes rearangement. So, just so we’re clear, I definitely don’t think an anime adaptation needs to be a page-by-page adaptation of the manga to be good. Every decent adaptation needs to have changes, and the ones that tries to just follow the source material without any heart often tend to get pretty bad. So changes are good! Cut content are needed sometimes. But in Furuba 19, it really... wasn’t the case.

And the most unfortunate thing being that the one suffering the most from this is the show’s main character herself, Tohru.

So, obviously other characters also got done dirty by this; Yuki and Machi’s relationship was so incredibly shifted in the background and rushed it’s almost funny. I’m one of the people who thinks that, while I do think they’re cute, I definitely agree on the fact their relationship was a bit underdeveloped in the manga — and that Machi’s character especially suffered as a result by being a bit reduced to just "Yuki’s love interest" when she was a character with so much more to offer (and as a whole I also tend to agree with the fact that Yuki probably didn’t need a romance at all and that his arc is more meaningful while focusing on his platonic relationships, but that’s another topic entirely) — but man, if the manga already underdevelopped them, then ohhh boy, the anime just completely dropped the ball. It feels very odd because to me it seemed like season 2 was taking their time with setting them up, so if they knew they had only 13 episodes for season 3 then they should’ve started the changes there; instead we got 1 nice Yuki/Machi/Kakeru episode, and then it’s like "Yep, they’re in love, just trust me." (It does makes me wonder if season 3 wasn’t originally supposed to be longer but then got restrained because of budget or covid or something…) Kakeru also very much suffered because of them cutting off his girlfriend and his complicated relationship with Tohru… Now, to be honest, I’ve always found the Kakeru/Komaki/Tohru subplot pretty... contrived and useless, and Komaki’s not so much a character more than a device for Kakeru’s development, but it does have some good moments relevant to the story’s themes (I like the ‘‘you can’t play suffering olympics with people’s pain’’morale) and it is important to his character (and Komaki is cute, I admit), so it was still sad they shafted it entirely. (Also I kind of like the tense relationship between Tohru and Kakeru. The fact they both seem to not appreciate each other even afterwards feel sort of refreshing even if it’s never explored unfortunately orz.) I was still surprised they didn’t actually try to make a Komaki cameo at the end? Cause I think it would’ve fitted and Kakeru’s girlfriend had already been mentioned in season 2 but... for some reason they... didn’t. (Mayyybe we’ll get an OAV like with Kyoko and Katsuya? Who knows.)

One scene that was skipped/rearranged that I’m very bitter over is the whole Tohru/Kagura confrontation and Kagura/Rin scene — it might not seem like much, but the moment of Tohru refusing to forgive Kagura is very important, and I was pretty annoyed they turned Rin’s trauma response to Kagura’s violence and her subsequent apology/hug to a gag, it legit felt tasteless. The Tohrin scene they removed at the very end too was frustating; it was great they managed to fit in the "Rin doesn’t want to forgive Akito" bit at least (I was afraid they’d cut it off entirely), but it was so essential for her to say to Tohru, not to Haru and Momiji (plus the way they put it in felt very random and awkwardly placed there, when they were initially talking about Tohru before orz). OH AND the Akito/Hana friendship too! Yeah I know it’s not a Big deal but I absolutely love the little glimpses of their friendship and it’s very important to me so I’m disappointed over them not including the ‘Ah-chan’ scene… (It was kind of weird that the show sort-of implied Hana and Kazuma got together too cause that’s… not the vibe at all from the manga… oh well.)

Most people I’ve seen generally only bring up season 3 regarding the cuts/rearangement because it’s the most obvious and the biggest offender, but I personally think there were already problems with season 2 and 1. At first glance I didn’t have much issue with some of the rearrangement, because early Furuba can indeed be pretty episodic, but thinking back on it as a whole I think it might’ve been better to leave some stuff, like Hana and Uo’s episodes for example, to season 2 (I do wonder if they did this specifically so the reboot would offer original content and differ from 2001 early on...) and cut off other not-so-important things from S1 & S2 — because as a result season 2 kind of suffer a bit by being The Yuki Season, which, for as much as I love Yuki, did end up being a bit annoying and made his development feel less natural and gradual, as well as the fact it sidelined the other characters a little and left them with not much conclusion in its final. So this added to how much they ended up cutting in season 3, it makes the show as a whole feels really unequal. I think they did overall a good job in season 3 with what they had, and they really nailed some of the dramatic and Kyoru moments (the sheets scene, cliff confrontation and post-hospital confession were practically perfect), but it is a shame that it ended up as an extremely marathoned emotional roller-caster rather than a more well-paced watch that we would’ve had if it had been 20 or so episodes. (I know others argued that season 3 was what it was because there wasn’t enough content left to cover for 22 or 24 episodes, but I disagree and even if there weren’t, it would’ve been the perfect occasion to add original episodes then. But I think it was more of a budget and Covid issue personally.)

But anyway, all of this isn’t actually what I’m the most annoyed with (and YES that’s a already a lot lmao), those are stuff I can live with, but like I said earlier the most problematic is what they cut off from Tohru’s character. And that indeed includes her parents’ backstory.

So, just so I get this out of the way; yes, I do understand why people were relieved to not see Kyoko and Katsuya’s relationship play out on screen, and yes the age gap and teacher-student thing is creepy and I do kind of wish it hadn’t been written that way. (Though I was a bit amused by people who thought we didn’t get the backstory because of the questionable age gap when, uh... you know I very much doubt the anime industry has an issue with that. Like, to start with, we wouldn’t have had Uo and Kureno’s romance if that was the case (even if Uo and Kureno is less problematic, it’s still the same basis of a underage high school girl/20+ adult man relationship), and second there was a literal romcom anime about a high school girl and an adult man that was broadcasted at the same time as Furuba season 3 lmao. So nah, it wasn’t there the problem to them, it was just time and episode restriction, which was pretty much confirmed with the announcement of the OAV focused on them.)

So, Kyoko and Katsuya is definitely Problematic and I agree on their relationship being uncomfortable; however, I’m a bit baffled that people were literally cheering on not having that part in the show, because it is... it is not just like a small bit of family trivia, it is Extremely important and actively essential to Tohru’s character and Fruits Basket’s themes and narrative as a whole. It’s very important to understand Kyoko’s character, of course; to humanize her and finally present her as a very flawed person and not just the idealized mother that Tohru project upon her, and it is extremely important simply to understand Tohru herself as well; to understand where her way of thinking, her trauma and attitude stems from, and this in a way that just isn’t possible to see with the little fragments of that flashback we got or the bits of Kyo and Kyoko’s interactions.

See, Tohru’s character is principally constructed around two things; her grief over her mother and her almost-pathological selflesness and people-pleaser needs that comes from her abandonment issues and loneliness, and her arc is very much about letting go of both of these things and finally moving forward and letting her life change. There’s this perception of Tohru I see sometimes that she’s not a very interesting character especially compared to others like Yuki or Kyo, or that she ‘‘stays the same kindhearted, naive girl from start to finish,’’ and while I deeply disagree with this I know where it comes from. The thing with Tohru is that she is firstly an extremely emotionally repressed character, and so a lot of her depth and development is made through small, gradual details scattered throughout the manga. It’s done in such a way that except for some obvious scenes those small, apparently insignificant moments are easy to miss or disregarded, and unfortunately it is a lot of these details that the 2019 anime cut, or rearanged in a way that feel less impactful or makes less sense; such as, like I pointed out earlier, her conversation with Ritsu after his suicide attempt. As I’ve seen others point out, this result in altering Tohru’s portrayal and rendering her character mostly about her romance, undercutting and downplaying all of her small, subtle character moments and developments, and miss a bit the second part of the story where the narrative actively challenge the ‘savior/therapist/mom’ that other characters and Tohru herself projected upon her.

And as a result it also means undermining things like her parallel and relationship to Akito, which idealistically should’ve been slowly built up throughout the last season but because of how rushed season 3 was in the end felt a little flat. (Akito’s character in general had some issues also because of the unequal pacing and rearranged scenes, though admittedly I think this was also an issue present in the original manga.) Kyo’s character and his romance with Tohru is the one element that managed to get out of this mostly unscathed (although Kyo also does suffer a bit from it), but because of what was removed from Tohru’s character it still inevitably impacted them by making their characters as individuals lacking. It’s not like it is a complete failure, mind you; I think the anime at least did a decent job at showing Tohru is Not Okay even at the beginning in season 1 (they certainly did a better job at it than the 2001 one lol) and managed to roughly portray her issues well enough overall, but it is just… lacking in the subtlety and nuances that, to me, makes her character and writing really special and unique.

(This post explains what I’ve tried to say here in a much more eloquent and better way that I ever could, and this all put into perspective what I basically love so much about Tohru and Fruits Basket in general.)

And, you know, it would’ve been sad but comprehensible with any other character, but here we’re talking about the story’s literal protagonist, which is why it is the part of the adaptation that makes me feel the most bitter. Tohru and her story is truly amazing and well-written, the thing I was looking forward to the most with this reboot — and while I do understand the episode restriction and I do believe they still did their best with what they had — her arc still deserved to receive a full proper adaptation, not a kind-of-half one.

So, yes, I am at least glad they’ll adapt Kyoko and Katsuya’s story in OAV, but the fact that it will never be included in the actual main narrative is still actively detrimental to it, and it will never have the same effect that if it had been played out before the Kyoru sheets scene where it should’ve been. (I hope they also won’t cut the fact that their story is narrated by Kyo, because that is also a very important detail for both Kyo and the story, but I have the feeling they will…)

Welp, that was quite a long, messy rambling. Not sure if anyone will actually read all of it but if you did then congrats lol. I feel in the end I’ve been really harsh and negative with the reboot… I do love it a lot! If someone asked me I would wholeheartedly recommend it (though I guess I would still argue to read the manga first if you really want to experience the story in all its nuances). I think they truly did an impressive job — even with season 3, which a lot of its episodes were beautifully done and did make me tear up a few times lol. I’m just sad it couldn’t actually offer a better, more nuanced delivery of the story’s depths and of one of my favorite manga protagonists that means a lot to me. But that’s an adaptation that so many fans wanted for years and I’m happy and grateful it’s here cause Fruits Basket deserved at least that much!

[petersspidey]

Art Class

A/N: Just another quarantine fic.

Summary: the four times Steve drew you, and the one time he didn't…. (except that's not a good summary. It's really just five times steve drew you,)

Warnings: Ok so… Pornographic pictures linked and you'll literally understand why when you read it and yes I did have to dig through (what's left) of the porn side of Tumblr… and smut lmao - also if the pictures didn’t link I'm rly sorry. I tried to make them :( 

Masterlist 

You were sitting in the lounge of the Avengers compound mid-quarantine. It had been weeks, and you were still inside. None of you had really gone out despite the fact that most of you were super-human in some way, Others of you were not. You, Tony, Pepper, and Natasha were all human, and didn't have any immunity to the virus.

You were sitting in the lounge reading your book when Steve came to sit down with you. You smiled at him when he sat down.

He shuffled awkwardly in his seat for a few moments.

"Panties in a twist?" you laughed, looking up from your book.

"No,"

"Well then what's up?" you asked

"I have to favour to ask you…" he said, still shuffling around in his seat

"What is it?"

"Well, the thing is, I'm-I-I am taking a class at Columbia and because of the quarantine classes moved online obviously and I was just wondering if you'd be free to help me with an assignment…"

"What class is it?" you asked

"W-well it's a life drawing class and I was hoping you'd be able to model for me. Usually a model would come into class and we'd draw them, but since we can't do that…."

You thought for a second, "Sure, Steve. I don't really have much else going on," you joked

You moved to go back to reading before Steve continued, "There's one more thing though…"

"What is it?"

"I-it's a nude life sketching class…."

You froze for a moment. Taken aback.

"Nude…?" you asked

"Yeah… l-look if you d-don't want to do this you don't have too. I-It's just t-that we have to sketch a woman and I figured that between the three women in the compound you would be the least likely to hit me when I asked,"

You laughed… "I can definitely see Nat hitting you, but I don't think Pepper would hit you if you asked her…"

"Yeah but Tony would…" Cap pointed out.

You sighed, and thought hard for a moment, "Look, Steve…"

"I'm sorry I asked, Y/N, I can just find images online or something," Steve said, cutting you off.

You laughed, "Steve, if you google images of naked women you're just going to end up finding porn, so…"  you took a deep breath "I will help you, as long as you promise not to make it awkward."

"I promise. I really appreciate it Y/N,"

You sighed, "Just let me know when you need me to strip for you Steve,"

Steve blushed, "T-thanks, Y/N,"

The first time Steve drew you, when he opened his bedroom door it was more than awkward.

You stood in front of him, still fully dressed.

"What do I do now?" you asked.

Steve scratched the back of his head awkwardly, "Uhm...get undressed…"

You nodded, and began taking your clothes off. You could see Steve out of the corner of your eye, trying not to make it obvious you were staring.

"I didn't realize you had so many tattoos…"

You nodded, "Uh, yeah, I have 8. They're not really in places you can see them unless you see me naked,"

Steve smiled.

"Where do you want me?" You asked, standing in front of him, completely unclothed.

"Uh, if you don't mind I was going to get you to actually sit on my bed, and lean against my headboard,"

You nodded, and turned to face Steve's bed. HIs bed was messily made, with his all white sheets gently strewn across the bed.

Steve stepped in front of you and moved the pillows out of the way. You sat down, and leaned your back against the headboard.

"Can… can i touch you?" Steve asked

You were taken aback for a moment, "Uh...What?"

Steve stopped, "Oh god. I meant can I touch your legs to move them?"

He was blushing.

You nodded.

Steve lightly touched your leg, bringing it up so it was folded up against your body. He moved the other so it was crossed in front of you. He lightly grabbed your arm, and laid it out on the pillows beside you. He lowered your shoulder of the arm resting on the pillow.

(I tried to describe this as best as I could, but please look at this post for reference).

"Can you stay exactly like this?" he asked

"Yes," you said softly.

Steve moved away from you, and sat on a chair that he has seated at the very end of his bed.

He sat there and just stared at you for a moment, before looking down at his sketchpad and began sketching.

You watched Steve intently.

His eyes never really met yours, he just looked between you and his sketchpad for what seemed like hours. It was hours.

When Steve was finally done, he smiled down at his image, and then looked up at you, finally making eye contact.

"So can I get dressed now?" You asked

Steve chuckled a little, "Yes, you can get dressed now,"

You climbed off his bed, and grabbed your clothes from where you had placed them.

"Can I see it?" you asked.

Steve stood from his seat, and walked toward you holding his drawing.

He handed the book to you, and you stared down at yourself.

You had never seen anything so well drawn. You could see every shape and curve of your body. Every line, every stroke was of you. Your hair strewn over your shoulder, and the tattoo on your ribs, it was all there. The softness of your face, and the few freckles on your nose that everyone claimed not to see, Steve drew them.

"Steve… this is amazing,"

"Thanks, Y/N," Steve said, smiling down at you.

"No, Steve, I mean it. I don't think I've ever seen anything so amazing with my two eyes,"

Steve blushed again, "Thanks, Y/N, it means a lot."

The second time Steve drew you, it was in his room again. He got you to lie down on your stomach on his bed. You used your arm to prop yourself up, so you were almost on an angle. You were completely naked again. Steve's white sheets covered your legs, coming all the way up to the bottom of your butt. Your long hair was strewn on the pillow behind you.

You couldn't see Steve. But you wished you could. You liked the focused look on his face the last time he looked at you, and the small blush that came across his cheeks every time he looked at your breasts.

When he was finished, he came over to show you. He sat down beside you on the bed, as you sat up and took the drawing in your hand. He had done it again. It was beautiful. You saw every wrinkle in the sheets, the small curve in your spine, you could almost see the texture of your skin.

"Steve, this is beautiful. You're really talented," you smiled at him, handing him back his drawing.

He felt proud of his work, "Thanks, Y/N,"

You sat beside Steve for a moment, leaning on his arm, the two of you admiring his work.

The third time Steve drew you, he avoided the bed. He got you to stand in front of him. Once again, completely naked. It was less awkward this time. You were almost used to walking into his room and stripping.

He got you to stand rather close to him. He positioned you to look down, your hair falling in front of your face. He placed your hand across your chest, resting just above your breasts. Your other hand placed gently on your face.

You were afraid that it would be hard standing this way for too long. Steve assured you that you'd be fine and you could take a break if you needed.

You watched Steve draw. He was so focused. It was odd watching him stare directly at your bare breasts. But it didn't feel wrong. You smirked, seeing Steve blush while drawing your nipples. Maybe it was weird for him, you thought. While you always had thought you would get naked for Steve one day, this wasn't exactly what you had expected.

When he was finished drawing, you raised your hands high above your body, stretching. You were sore from standing in the same position for so long. But this time, when Steve was done drawing, he didn't look away.

You sat down on the edge of Steve's bed, still completely naked. You saw Steve shift in his seat, uncomfortably. He leaned over and handed you the drawing.

You smiled, looking at it. It was just as beautiful as the last two.

"I have to say, Steve. I never really think of myself as looking beautiful, especially not while I'm naked. But when I look at these drawings, I don't know how you do it, but it makes me look beautiful," you said.

Steve looked at you, "What do you mean y/n? You're always beautiful,"

You blushed, "Thanks, Steve."

The fourth time Steve drew you, he got you back on his bed. You lied on your side, using one arm to prop yourself up on your pillows. Once again you rested your hands on your chest, just above your breasts. One of your legs was crossed under the other, and one out straight.

Just like the other times, Steve moved you into position. Lightly touching you, always making sure not to touch your boobs or butt.

This drawing took particularly long. You had to take breaks through this piece, it was hard to keep yourself propped up on one arm for so long. During your breaks, the two of you would chat like it was nothing that one of you was naked.

When Steve would go back to drawing, you couldn't help yourself. Your eyes always trailed down to his pants. Everytime he drew you, you couldn't help but wonder if it turned him on just as much as it did you.

It was sometimes hard to tell though. Often enough his sketchpad was resting on his lap. And, Steve's pants were always kind of tight, you assumed it was due to his large package, and it was always hard to tell if he was hard. But, with every chance you got while he was drawing, you looked anyway. And from what you could see, he was hard the whole time. Just like how by the end of the drawing sessions, you were wet and knew for a fact that if your panties were still on, they'd be soaked through.

"Steve this is amazing,"

"Thanks. I really appreciate your help, Y/N. My professor has really loved my last few pieces. I'm on track to get an A in the class,"

"Steve! That's awesome!" you smiled

"It helps having a such a beautiful muse,"

You somehow always left each other blushing.

The fifth time Steve drew you, Steve had you stand in front of him again. This time, your back to him. Your head tilted slightly to the side, looking over your shoulder.

You were sad you couldn't stare at him. Especially since this was the last drawing he needed for his class. You watched him draw you out of the corner of your eye. You didn't want this session to end. Knowing that you were not going get to be this intimate with Steve again.

You felt as if this was the longest session yet. Steve took his time drawing you, making sure to catch every detail of your body.

When he finished, Steve came up behind you to show you the complete sketch. He stood towering behind you as you held the drawing in your hands.

You admired each stroke of his pencil. Seeing yourself in these images gave you a new perspective. Each drawing was how Steve saw you. Beautiful.

"You're so talented,"

You knew Steve was smiling behind you. He was an amazing artist, but didn't show off his work often and enjoyed getting the compliments.

"Means a lot, Y/N,"

You turned to face Steve, handing him his book.

"I have to say, I'm kinda sad I won't get to see anymore drawings of me like that. I loved everything you drew the past few weeks. It really did make me feel beautiful,"

"Like I said before, Y/N, you're always beautiful,"

"Thanks Steve, that means a lot coming from you,"

You leaned down to grab your clothes that you had left on the floor. You slipped your panties back on and sat on the edge of Steve's bed, turning your shirt back right side in.

"What do you mean it means a lot coming from me?" Steve asked.

"I just mean, you're important to me. And your opinion is important to me. I'd rather you think i'm beautiful than some random guy on the street,"

"Well why else would you think I ask you to do this for me? You're the most beautiful person I know. It'd be hard for me to ask anyone else, knowing there was someone more beautiful that I could draw,"

You smiled. You could feel your cheeks heating up.

"I thought you picked me because I was the only one who wouldn't hurt you for even asking," you joked

'Well, that too," Steve smiled back at you.

You were silent for a moment. You slipped your shirt over your head. And moved to put your jeans back on.

Steve moved to stand in front of you, and grabbed your hand. Letting you gently drop your pants.

"I did mean it though, Y/N. When I said you're the most beautiful person I've ever known,"

You looked up at Steve. He had a soft look on his face. You could see the yearning on his face. You stood up, not looking away from Steve.

The look he had on his face in this moment, was how you always looked at him. You yearded for him since you met him. Your heart ached every day you weren't with him.

You stood on your tip toes and placed one of your hands on Steve's cheek and pulled his face closer to yours. You closed the gap between the two of you, and gently pressed your lips against his. Steve hesitated for a second before placing his hands on your hips and pulling you closer to him.

He held you so tight, as if he never wanted to let you go. You pressed your lips tighter against one another. You were so happy in this moment you wanted to cry. You imagined every day Steve wanting you, and loving you. You imagined your first kiss so many times, and this was perfect.

Steve held you against him, and pulled his lips off of yours. He rested his forehead against yours. Both of you were smiling.

"I can't even tell you how long i've wanted to do that," you said softly,

"I'm so happy you did," he smiled.

You placed your feet flat on the ground again, just looking up at Steve.

"I was dying the past few weeks. I can't tell you how hard it was with you in front of me, naked, and I couldn't even touch you. I really didn't know you felt this way about me too,"

"You can touch me now," you said, moving Steve's hands from your waist to your ass.

Steve laughed.

He leaned back down to kiss you softly, his hands only trailing away from your ass to lift up your shirt. He pulled away from the kiss to pull your shirt over your head, tossing it aside.

Two could play at this game, you thought. You began lifting Steve's shirt, letting him pull it the rest of the way off. Your hands trailed down to his belt, undoing it from his pants. Steve just watched you as you unzipped his jeans, and pulled both his pants and underwear down his thighs. Steve kicked them off. He stood in front of you completely naked.

"Sit down," you said.

Steve obeyed, and sat down on his bed. You slipped off your panties. You moved to straddle Steve, your wet pussy rubbing against Steve's hard cock. He wrapped his arms around you, as to not let you fall. You wrapped your arms around his neck, and pressed your lips against his.

You moved your lips against each other's. Deepening the kiss. His tongue entering your mouth. You continued to rock your wet pussy against his dick, teasing him.

You pulled away from the kiss. You looked at Steve as you grabbed his hard cock in your hand. You slowly raised your body, pressing his cock at your entrance. You slowly sat down, his hard dick entering you. He felt huge, despite how wet you were, you were still tight. You weren't sure if you would be able to take him all in.

Suddenly, you felt yourself open up. Both you and Steve moaned as you took the rest of him in. You both sat still for a moment, adjusting to the feeling of Steve being inside of you.

Steve pulled your tighter against him. Your chests were pressed together. He closed the gap between your lips once more, moaning into your mouth as you began rocking back and forth on his cock. The feeling of Steve filling you up, already made you want to orgasm.

His hands were pressed tight against your back, holding you close to him. His mouth moved against yours. Your tongues brushing against each other. You continued to rock back and forth on his dick. Nearly every movement caused him to moan into your kiss.

You kept one arm wrapped around his neck for support, but moved the other down to your clit. As soon as you touched yourself, a shock went through you. You rubbed small circles around your clit, as Steve thrust into you, while you continued to rock on his cock.

You moaned into your kisses. You bit Steve's lip as he moaned your name.

Your breathings became heavy, as you both neared orgasm. You felt like you were sitting on Steve's lap, rocking on his dick forever. The moment felt like it would never end.

You felt like you had never been so intimate with someone during sex before. Never been so vulnerable.

You could feel your orgasm building as Steve began making harder thrusts inside of you, and you started making faster circles around your clit. Your mouth never left Steve's, continuing to kiss as you came.

You moaned loud into his mouth as you felt your wall come crashing down, contracting around Steve's dick. Second later, you could feel Steve's dick twitching inside of you.

When you both same down from your orgasms, you silently rested your foreheads against one anothers. All you could hear was your heavy breathing and your hearts beating quickly.

Steve let himself fall backward, bringing you with him. The both of you laughed as you slipped off of dick and fell beside him.

You rested your head on his chest, and listened to his heartbeat. Steve ran his hand along your back and kissed your forehead.

"You're beautiful," he murmured.

[tfw-no-tennis]

mtmte liveblog issue 36

time travel arccccccccccccc yessssssssss

I have been waiting SO LONG to reread this arc hhhhh yessss

starting off strong with the sexy roller cover. nice

I love the disconnect of ‘orion pax: outlaw’ compared to the last time we saw him in shadowplay where he was orion pax: supercop

he’s still punching people for JUSTICE or whatever so I guess not much has changed

oh my god this is the issue with the many many two-page spreads...the first time I read this issue I didn't realize that was a thing and GOD I was SO fucking confused. there's already a lot going on in this issue/arc but this made things so much worse hvbhjkdfbsk. I powered thru and still managed to understand most of the arc despite reading half this issue out of order (essentially) bc the website I read it on split the pages up and I couldn't tell they were supposed to be doubled (and also I'm dumb so I didn't figure it out)

anyways, the actual issue...windcharger is out here using his powers to rip a dudes arms clean off. wow!

and there's skids getting punched in the face. Ls

and glitch! a totally minor character of course...

MANNNNN I SO adore the panel of all the lost lighters appearing in a cloud of purple smoke, all posing epically....SO fucking good, peak sci-fi coolness vibes, A++

as usual jro killing it w/the titles, ‘elegant chaos’ is such a great name for a time travel arc

also reading the tfwiki has shown me that many of jros titles are song or album titles, to which I say - that's epic and I love it. with jro doing it, I feel like it straddles the line between referencing music and the very fanfic-esque ‘title things after music’ vibe. I love it

oh god I forgot they use bs cybertronian time units in this sometimes lmao...I mean of course they do but still like, what the fuck is a cycle. is that a day. I feel like these words all have no meaning/the meanings change drastically depending on continuity. I cant keep up and also I'm lazy and don't care enough to try

I love rodimus did u know

poor riptide looks so confused lmao

IS....IS REWIND PIGGYBACKING TAILGATE...THATS SO FUCKING CUTE....I cant fully tell bc of the page layout but ooomg so precious. minibot buddies

whirl saying ‘chuff’ just reminded me how british jro is hvbhakjhdsfbs sometimes it just Jumps Out in mtmte and I'm like Oh God Britain Is Real

I really like the mtmte approach to time travel and paradoxes and whatnot. its just complex enough to be interesting but not too convoluted that it bogs down the story. perfect sci-fi fun!

mannnn chromedome talking abt brainstorm :( I'm sad abt those two hhhhh

and I love how at this point, nobody in the cast ACTUALLY knows brainstorm well enough to know what he’s really doing - including chromedome, who’s ostensibly his closest friend, somebody he’s known for a while - and even the readers don't really know what he’s up to...I like the mystery tbh

cant believe rewind wrote orion pax’s biography, omg. completely forgot abt that detail

cd saying ‘I love it when he talks history’ about rewind....hhhh I love cdrw so muuuuch

godddd the line rodimus says abt whirl - how they need people like whirl around who are ‘happy to get in the way’ of danger and death - that shit haunts me man like...rodimus is basically saying that he’s bringing whirl along to potentially die in place of someone like orion pax (nevermind the fact that whirl dying would ALSO fuck up the timeline)...like, how deep does it go?? is he saying that bc he knows whirl has been trying to get himself killed for a while now, or just bc whirl likes violence? mannn I cant...the character intricacies...man

anyways...I love rodimus he’s such an interesting character. you have that fucked up moment and then in the next panel he’s saying ‘if you want to call it a time phone, I wont stop you’ about the quantum walkie-talkie. he has the RANGE

oh and then rodimus casually volunteering chromedome to do mnemosurgery on anyone who might accidentally find out about them time traveling, which is again fucked up on multiple levels. the raaaaange

vjaksbhdhfusajbfdjk that panel of the lost light squad just standing there like idiots reminds me of that post where someone said abt that panel ‘these characters have a collective 3 brain cells’ or something hvbjadkfnksfdl

rodimus IMMEDIATELY breaking his own rules by trying to reassure pax that they're good guys by pointing at his autobot badge, even tho the autobots DONT EVEN EXIST YET at this point...my boy PLEASE go purchase some brain cells from the store 

and the fact that rodimus introduced himself to pax w/his real name...shouldn't he go by an alias or st??? that seems like a good time travel rule since optimus and rodimus definitely know each other later 

and like, did they not anticipate that some of the people in the past would recognize some of the lost lighters hgbajkhdjfnjksf like cd and whirl get Instantly recognized...great job guys

they are all SO bad at this hvbahskjdhfbasjkf I cantttt luckily for them the orion crew is handing them easy alibis 

‘the dugout’ is that a baseball reference????

also I love the scenery here, the bg looks like rock but there's metal piping and stuff running thru it, its so cool...really adds to the whole ‘cybertron biomes are made of metal’ thing

‘ancient history’ rodimus are you KIDDING ME-

cyclonus time travels to the past and IMMEDIATELY finds a window to stare broodingly out of. icon

tailgate thinking orion pax is SUPER COOL continues here from shadowplay and I love it...tailgate is so cute

and the tg saying ‘don't you think that's awesome, cyclonus?’ hhhhh so cute

one reason I love this arc so much is that this is the arc where the gay Really amps up 

TRAILBREAKER.... oh man ;_;

are you telling me that this outlaw base they're in has ONE bed for all of these people. what the hell vhbaksjhfnsal

cant believe rung sampled roller’s steroid juice box

also cant believe robot steroids exist. except yes I can and I love it

oooh roller’s a 0/1%er? I forgot abt that 

cant believe orion pax just grabs some random phone that belongs to these weird new people and answers it. WHO does that

goddddd megatron and orion’s conversation....destroy me

HHHHHH like...the HISTORY....the regret...the missed opportunities...its all so palpable....goddddddd

and of COURSE, the whole thing is steeped in tragedy...the ideological differences that will become the foundation for a 4 million year long war...megatron, who believes that you need to burn things down and start again to really make change stick, and then orion, who says ‘reform is the answer, not revolution’....AUGHHH the intricacies. mannnn

‘you sound lost’ 😭😭😭

‘its tragic.’ yeah, that about sums up their relationship, especially at this stage and in this continuity 

anyways. [cries about old man megatron talking to young naïve orion pax] goodbye

AUGHHH and then we jump to rodimus ONCE AGAIN breaking his own rules and trying to save trailbreaker...IT HURTS MAN...god I love rodimus, I feel like him being broken up about crewmembers like trailbreaker dying is one part regular sadness over people he knows dying for tragic reasons, and one part personal guilt at someone under his command dying, even if he’s not involved/at fault. I love the dichotomy of this emotional reaction that comes only partially from empathy/emotion, but also comes from a kinda self-centered need for success as measured by people under your command staying alive. and taking into account rodimus’s life it totally makes sense that he’d act like that...GAH I love it. the complexity of it all!

orion pax saying ‘you should read [megatron]. it’s powerful stuff’ I'm screaming, so many LAYERSSSSS

I fucking love time travel AHHHHHHHHH like the opportunity for interactions like these....chefs kiss

‘hey, best friend! miss you!’ rodimus is such a shit hvbdajkfksjhfd 

‘very sus’ rodimus ahead of his time w/the among us lingo

oooh and then they realize that the senate is trying to kill the sparks...gotta save the babies!

tailgate scolding cyclonus for bluntly stating that you'd wanna be subtle when killing newborns...hhhvbhsdfhhhhhh I love them sm

ooooh and rewind has an interesting suggestion - that the senate is actually trying to irradiate the sparks into being outliers...rewind is so smart I love him

and the fact that he’s using history from his database...love it

rodimus sending cyclonus and whirl out like pokemon

ROLLER NOOOO DONT GO OUT THERE

also wow this is literally the 5th (I think) double page spread in this issue...the confusion I felt the first time I read this...lmao 

and now this is literally one of my favorite issues so I'm glad I know what's going on lmao

oh man rodimus telling cd not to erase trailbreakers memory even tho that could jeopardize the entire timeline... :( 

oh man I didn't even notice but roller getting debris blasted into his face like that makes the whole ‘roller is tarn’ theory even more legit considering tarn’s face scars....

‘tighter the better’ hhh don't say that orion. but also, that’s the companion phrase to megatron saying ‘the deeper the better’ hvbhasjkhdfbaksjlf

I do love the semi-campy action hero antics that orion pax gets up to. its just so fun, even when the stakes are high and things are serious

‘this is the greatest thing I have ever seen’ tg ily

THE REVEAL THAT THE SPARKS WENT TO NYON...so rodimus just saved himself, basically...time travel is so trippy

GODDDD ND THEN TRAILBREAKER...HVHHHHHh 😭😭😭 THATS SO CRUEL MAN

oh man that last panel of trailbreaker holding up roller’s juice box...iirc the first time I read this I thought that was roller (cause of the juice box I guess? idk I'm an idiot) so I was like oh ok he must've come back or something. very much related but I didn't really think about tarn being a particular pre-established character and totally didn't read the whole ‘roller is tarn’ thing that was going on 

which in my defense ruth also didn't pick up on any of that while reading this and eventually like 2 issues before the reveal I had to prompt her like ‘you should maybe be wondering WHO tarn is’ vhbahjksdfbaksjdf

so! issue 37! this issue is a solid favorite of mine, id say definitely top 5 or even 3. I'm super biased bc I fucking LOVE time travel, it’s seriously one of my favorite tropes ever, and this issue hits all the time travel beats I love. characters traveling to the past and interacting with people they know! conversations that have multiple meanings bc of TIME TRAVEL! trying to save someone who meets a terrible fate in your future! fun time travel action! the time traveling characters being generally terrible at hiding the fact that they're time travelers! ITS SO GOOD. 

and I love the clever way everything is tied together here - where we get a nice continuation of shadowplay, with this taking place shortly after that with a lot of the same cast, and time travel classics like the good ole ‘if we hadn't travelled back in time and done what we did, the future we came from wouldn't have existed at all,’ in the flavor of ‘rodimus saving his baby self’ and ‘rodimus NOT saving trailbreaker’ and ‘everyone forgot about roller :(’ 

ok but like, did the lost lighters just go ‘oh well, guess rollers gone now.’ like they DID realize that the outlaw crew would have no idea what happened to him if they got their memories erased, right?? did the lost lighters figure that since roller never reappeared after this time period, that was how history was ‘supposed’ to go and they shouldn't mess with it? am I overthinking it? as usual: yes, probably. I love overthinking about comics, in case that wasn't obvious

basically...I love this issue soooo much. so so good and a bunch of fun tropes that I love. I mean the whole arc is like that for me since I love time travel so much. so I cant wait to (re)read more!!

[mimi-cee-hq]

Anonymous Text - Futakuchi x Reader

(I blame @/starlity’s blog for this story because it made me want to write for a Dateko character. 😊 )

Summary:

From Nametsu’s suggestion, Y/n starts taking requests to practise her makeup skills. Futakuchi starts texting her for fun without telling her who he is. But there’s a reason why he wants to stay anonymous.

I have a Futakuchi character summary post if you forgot who he is. I reference some of the scenes in that post for this story so I recommend taking a look at it. I also took a different approach to Futakuchi’s character, but it’s still based on canon events. Also, Nametsu Mai is Dateko’s manager, Koganegawa is their huge baby setter, and Onagawa is the season 4 dude with the big hair they nicknamed Pantalons.

Request from @rynn-lee:

hi, hi!! could i ask for a matchup? 🤓 well, i’m 18 and 5’4. i’m curvy and a bit chubby, and i have straight strawberry blonde hair and hazel eyes (also glasses uwu). my style is something in between 80s and rocker, i always wear black, RED, animal prints, leather… and my makeup has to be always on point lol (i’m studying makeup). about my personalityyy… i’m a very calm and patient person, i think i tend to be kind and very open minded. i can be shy sometimes, but i’m usually outgoing. i also love having fun, and i’m always teasing my friends. i may be a bit sarcastic too… 👀 but i always try to help and do all i can for them my passions are music (mostly hard rock and 80s), art, drawing, reading, cinema… (useless fact: i LOVE jurassic park omg) i also love very very much the beach, i could be there forever. and, although being calm, i have anxiety issues :( i’m a big nerd and i live for memes lmao i hope this works! thank you in advance! ❤️

Anonymous Text - Futakuchi x Reader

Words: 2,245

“You’re right. That looks pretty bad.” laughed Y/n.

“I told you. It looks worse than it actually is though. It doesn’t hurt that much.”

Nametsu continued to explain to Y/n that she had gotten the bruise on her cheek during the boys’ volleyball practice. Futakuchi had accidentally hit her when he turned around while carrying the volleyball pole.

“But seriously, I don’t know what to do with him. Futakuchi is supposed to be the captain, but he’s not exactly the best role model. Some days I feel like Aone would have been the better choice.”

“So is he the guy you have a crush on?”

“Futakuchi?” asked Nametsu. Y/n nodded. "Ew. No. You wouldn’t want to date him. He takes things too lightly. He was always causing trouble for our senpais.“

Y/n was in the same class as Futakuchi, but they had never really talked to each other. She’d hear about him at times from Nametsu, usually complaining about him. But Y/n was the kind of person who’d want to get to know someone herself instead of basing her opinion on what someone else had told her. She wondered if Futakuchi really was as bad as Nametsu had said.

“Okay,” said Y/n as she took a closer look at Nametsu’s bruise. "I might be able to help you out with this.“

It was Y/n’s dream to become a makeup artist, so she had recently went to a makeup camp for high schoolers. One of the things they had learned was to create a bruised look. She had also learned how to cover up bruises. So she was happy to help Nametsu with what she had learned.

“Thanks so much, Y/n,” said Nametsu. “I didn’t want people at school commenting on it all day.”

“It’s no problem,” Y/n smiled.

When she was done, Nametsu was amazed at her work. “It’s like it’s not even there anymore!”

“This is good practice for me too,” Y/n replied with a smile. “I could do this every day for you until your bruise disappears, if you’d like.”

Nametsu’s eyes sparkled, delighted at Y/n’s offer. “I’d love that! You’re the best!” she exclaimed as she hugged her. As Y/n packed up her makeup tool box, Nametsu asked, "Have you ever thought about taking requests? I bet other girls at school would love to have their makeup done by you.“

Y/n thought for a moment. She had never considered it before. "That sounds like it would be fun!” she replied with a grin.

A few weeks later, Nametsu’s bruise healed so Y/n wasn’t as busy with her make-up anymore. It was tiring for her to wake up so early every day, but she’d do anything for her friends. Nametsu helped Y/n create some posters to place around the school with information about this new undertaking of hers. It wasn’t too long before she got some make-up requests. But she also got an interesting one.

Unknown number: You do make-up right?

Y/n: I do. Is there a certain style you want?

Unknown number: Could you make my lips look plump? Extra plump? And really red? Could you also make my eyelashes 10 inches long?

Y/n smirked at the request. It seemed like she attracted a troll. But being the calm and patient person she was, she replied with sarcasm.

Y/n: Sure. I can definitely do that. Red is a nice colour. I’ll need $400 to cover the cost of the 10 inch false eyelashes.

Unknown number: What? They exist?

Y/n: Sorry, I forgot to add “/sarcasm”

“What are you doing?” asked Nametsu in class, noticing Y/n smiling at her phone.

“Just having fun with a troll,” she laughed. When she got another notification on her phone, she saw there was a reply.

Unknown number: I deserved that. How are you doing? Are you getting any requests?

Y/n didn’t expect that those first few texts to be the start of an interesting friendship. The two of them continued to text each other over the next few weeks. It was kind of weird, but also fun. She didn’t learn much about him. She knew he was a guy that went to her school. He had apparently seen the posters which is where he got her number. He told her that he wanted to keep his identity a secret for fun. She didn’t mind.

At first the texts were just silly. He’d share a picture making fun of one of the teachers. She’d share a meme in response. But after a few weeks of texting back and forth, they started sharing more with each other.

That guy: Have you ever dealt with people who say they understood what you said, but it looks like they didn’t understand at all?

Y/n: Lol. Are you having a hard time teaching someone?

That guy: I guess you could say that.

Another day, Y/n decided to share her worries with him as well.

Y/n: I’m starting to get anxious about my next request. The last one didn’t go so well. She didn’t like it.

That guy: What? You worked so hard! Who do I need to hunt down?

Y/n: Ummm… No. Please don’t. It’s not like you’d get away with it.

That guy: Don’t worry. I won’t get caught. I’ve had lots of practice!

Y/n just stared at that last text and laughed. “Who is this guy?”

“Who?” asked Nametsu, who was sitting beside her in class.

“Just ‘that guy’,” she replied.

“You’re still texting him?” asked Nametsu. Y/n nodded with a smirk. “Anyway, how are your make-up requests going?”

“They’re alright. I’m starting to run out of make-up though, so I’ll need to get more supplies.”

Y/n didn’t expect to see her tall and large classmate in front of her the next day. Aone handed her an envelope. When she asked what it was for, he just gestured to the note that was on it.

“This is for the eyelashes. I expect them to look awesome,” said the handwritten note on the envelope.

She read the note with a snicker. When she looked at the other side to open the envelope, there was an additional note.

“Actually, I don’t think they’ll suit me. Just use this to buy other make-up supplies.”

If this envelope contained what she thought, she couldn’t believe how generous he was being to her. He was really starting to spoil her and she couldn’t help but wonder who he was. He had told her that he still wanted stay anonymous. She didn’t know why, but she decided to respect his boundaries if he had a good reason to not reveal himself.

She opened the envelope and stared at the contents before she laughed her head off. “He’s such a dork!” she said, knowing that he likely didn’t mean to do that.

*****

Futakuchi felt his phone vibrate. He smiled when he saw that he got a text from Y/n.

Y/n: So what are your interests and hobbies? Besides texting me of course.

Futakuchi: They’re a secret. :P Are you still trying to find out who I am?

Y/n: Nope, just curious.

Futakuchi: Well, I’m not telling you. But what other things do you like?

Y/n: That’s hardly fair.

She decided to tell him her other interests anyway. She wished that their school didn’t have uniforms. She liked her own style: a mix of 80s and rocker. Futakuchi didn’t know what she meant by 80s style. She didn’t know if Japan had an equivalent style, so he ended up searching pictures for the fashion style during that decade. He laughed when he replied her.

Futakuchi: LOL! Their hair looks like Pantalon’s!

But it wasn’t until her reply that he realized that he let out a slip.

Y/n: Are you on the volleyball team?

Futakuchi panicked. He didn’t want her to know who he was. Now she was one step closer.

*****

A couple of months back, Futakuchi sighed as he walked back to his classroom. He had left his knee pads there the other day, so he had to get them before their morning practice had started. “I should apologize to Nametsu again,” he thought to himself. “I actually feel bad about giving her that bruise.”

When he arrived at the classroom, it was empty except for the one girl who had her head down at her desk. When he took a closer look, he saw that she was actually sleeping. He recalled Nametsu mentioning that Y/n had been helping her with make-up everyday. “She must have gotten here even earlier than us to do Nametsu’s makeup,” he thought.

He sighed, remembering that there was a time when he used to be like that.

In junior high, he had been best friends with a girl he had known for years. They had basically grown up together. He had liked her - a lot. She had decided to try to date him, but she had gotten overwhelmed with how much he would do for her. She had felt bad that she hadn’t been doing as much for him. He had told her that he didn’t care. But it had taken a toll on their relationship.

“I don’t think I can do this anymore, Kenji. You’re too serious,” she had told him.

It had hurt. So he had decided that he wouldn’t be so serious the next time he dated a girl. But as he looked at Y/n sleeping at her desk, he wondered if it would be different with her. “She works so hard for her friends,” he thought to himself. “Would she be the same for a boyfriend?”

He pushed that thought to the back of his mind, until he saw her posters. When he saw her number right in front of him, he decided to text her on a whim. He saw her smile at his ridiculous request. After she gave her sarcastic reply, he knew they’d get along. But as they texted, he didn’t notice that his feelings for Y/n had grown so much to the point where he was worried about her finding out who he was. Since he had given her money for her make-up supplies, he was especially worried that Y/n would feel burdened by it. At least he could still hide behind the anonymous label. Or so he thought.

Y/n: Thanks for the money!

Y/n: BTW, I know who you are now. You’re on the volleyball team.

Futakuchi started to panic. “She knows it’s me?” He started to worry about what her opinion was of him. But then she next text gave him a different dilemma.

Y/n: I’ve been helping you too. :)

He was confused because she hadn’t been helping him with anything. They barely even talked in person. But during their next volleyball practice, he saw that she was a lot closer with Koganegawa.

“Thanks so much for helping me Y/n-senpai!’ said Koganegawa.

"You’re welcome,” she replied with a smile. “I was happy to help.” Koganegawa was moved to tears from how grateful he was and gave her a hug.

Futakuchi found himself stepping between the two of them and pushing them apart. “Futakuchi?” asked Y/n, confused. “What’s wrong?”

For Futakuchi, this whole thing was wrong. She had been helping the wrong person this whole time. He knew he could set it right if he just revealed himself to her. He started to grow frustrated at this situation. He had to decide. Was better to stay behind an unknown phone number and to be mistaken for Koganegawa? Or should he reveal himself to her at the risk of Y/n potentially being put off by him?

Futakuchi told her.

Y/n blinked a few times and had to do a double take. “I think you were supposed to say something else first?”

That was when that he actually confessed to her instead. “I like you.” He wasn’t supposed to say that. But his thoughts were such a mess that he ended up confessing to her instead.

Y/n just giggled at him. “Well, I already knew it was you who was texting me. I was just waiting to see if you’d tell me yourself.”

Futakuchi blushed, not knowing if it was from the embarrassment of accidentally confessing or from how cute her laugh was. “But didn’t you say that you were helping me?” he asked.

“I have been,” she replied. “I’ve been helping Koganegawa with setting practice. Didn’t you say you were having a hard time teaching him?”

Futakuchi couldn’t believe that he had misunderstood the whole thing. Koganegawa started to excitedly ramble about how much his practices with Y/n had helped. She had scolded him every time his sets were too high, knowing that Futakuchi wasn’t good with those ones. He was shocked that she had done all of that for him.

With determination, Futakuchi suddenly grabbed her wrists and told her, “Go out with me.” He stared at her eyes intently, waiting for her answer.

“I think you’re supposed to ask,” she teased.

Futakuchi smirked at her. “Fine,” he complied. “Could you be my girlfriend?”

“Maybe,” she said as she started to walk away. But Futakuchi didn’t let her get away and hugged her from behind. “Okay,” she said with a smirk as she turned around to hug his waist.

“Hold on a moment,” said Futakuchi. “How did you know it was me?”

“Pro tip: use cash instead of a check if you want to stay anonymous.”

*****

Extras

The Dateko volleyball club was very confused at the whole scene because they never saw the two interact before. Nametsu knew they were texting each other but didn’t think they’d like each other.

Nametsu didn’t approve of Futakuchi at first until she saw how serious he was about her.

He offered to take her to any movie she wanted. Y/n just wanted to watch Jurassic Park all the time to the point where he got sick of it.

@rynn-lee was actually a setter, but because she didn’t put it in the request, I was vague about how Y/n helped Koganegawa. 😊

I hope you liked it. This story ended up being so meta with me answering my request with a story about Y/n answering her request. 😅 It was actually unintentional.

Check out my other stories. I have a completed long fic and some other short stories too. 😊

Matchup tag list: @nagichi-deku, @nxlx96 (let me know if you want to be added to or removed from the tag list) And tagging @haikoo because you usually like these stories.

[sloppy-butcher]

I saw your requests were open,if not I’m sorry :,). But can I get some hcs with Frank,Dwight (Jake and/or Quentin) with a s/o who’s a short curvier artist and is just insecure about themselves and their work? I’m just in sad boy hours rn lmao

please don’t ever feel sorry about sending in an ask

Sorry, it took as long, I can’t help with how much I write. Hopefully, this will help alleviate some of them sad boy hours. I’m going to assume that by “artist” you mean drawing and not like music soooo also im going to assume its a survivor S/O

i love you anon, thank you for the ask and sorry again for the wait

sad boy hours is offically declared OVER

HeadCanons with a short, insecure Artist S/O

The Legion (Frank Morrison)

Frank, in all honesty, doesn’t give a flying crap about how you look. To him, if you can make him laugh or you amuse him in the slightest, he already likes you. The only looks or appearances he does care about are his own, he’s gotta look badass 24/7, no exceptions. But he does like that you are shorter than him (not a lot of people are so you are a rarity). He likes to tease you and put his elbow on your shoulder or head.

“I need my walking stick.” His eyes would trail over to you. Cue you trying to walk around with the boy hanging onto you, grumbling like an old man. You contrasted him exactly to the T

Frank is absolutely fascinated by your artistic abilities. You have a real talent and he enjoys both watching your process and seeing the finished project. Talent like yours was hard to come by, he sort of envied you for it. If only he had that kind of something that made him special that would have made those foster parents interested in him. But that time for developing uniqueness has passed and now, all he has is you.

You shared your talent with him and he felt extremely special when you would ask him what to sketch next. Frank would pull Suzie over and set her up in a position he imagines to be cool. He would pause, inspect Suzie’s bad form then huff and begin to rearrange her limbs until she was just right. “That's nice.” He’d comment over your shoulder. You’d tell him you didn't like being watched like that while you work and he’d sigh and reluctantly shuffle away. Not even 5 minutes later he would be back standing over you. You would just have to deal with him. He wasn’t judging you or your skills rather he just wanted to watch and marvel at how easy you made it look.

“Okay, now give her a huge dick.” Both Suzie and you would gasp. “Frank! No! That's too disgusting.” A moment of silence. “How big?”

Frank noticed right away when you would start to feel insecure. When you would flatly refuse to take out your sketchbook regardless of what ridiculous poses Suzie would make for you. You were quiet, eyes downwards and shoulder slumping as if you were trying to make yourself somehow smaller than you already were. Frank’s by no means an emotional guy but seeing you so downtrodden, so determined to sink into the background really tore at his heartstrings. He would pull you aside, taking you far away from the others until you two were alone. You wouldn’t look at him, your arms wrapped around yourself. “It’s not just the art.” He was guessing but already he knew he was right. You wouldn’t even offer him a nod afraid that by doing so you would be labeled as someone digging for feigned sympathy.

This was so difficult for Frank. He didn’t know how to comfort you or how to make you feel better. He also didn’t understand where this sudden insecurity came from. To him you perfect and talented and such a good person. You had a kind heart which you would share with those around you and that's all he really cared about. You were good to him. He couldn’t think of anything to say so instead he walked closer to you and slowly placed your hand between his. You momentarily looked up at him and you saw his eyes flicker behind his mask. He squeezed your hand, his words failing but his contact and pressure making up for it. He was trying to be reassuring and you appreciated it. He’d only ever hold your hand and that was something to be gratefully for.

In that time alone he asked you to take out your sketchbook. You did and he steps away, releasing one hand from yours. He reaches up and hesitantly takes off his mask. “Draw me.” You were stuck, in awe of his face and the significance of this moment. Frank never takes his mask off, not completely anyway. This must really mean something to him, YOU must really mean something. A wave of unsureness washed over you and you lost all confidence in your skill. He saw you slip away again and he squeezed his hand. “Hey.” He makes you look at him, his face gentle and his attention focused solely on you. “I believe in you. You are good. You got this.” And that's all you needed to hear. You got the feeling that he was talking about more than just your drawing skills. If he believed in you then everything was okay. You were alright. “Besides. It can’t be worse than the original.”

Dwight Fairfield

Like Frank, Dwight doesn't really care about your outward appearances. Well, it's not that he doesn't care it’s more that he just in a constant state of shock that anyone at all is interested in him. He’s always amazed when you sit next to him specifically or when you want to talk to him and actually listen to what he says. No one has ever really given him that kind of attention before and now you’re here beside him eagerly wanting to hear how his day was or what he was feeling. Dwight was just grateful to have someone as kind and loving as you were to even notice him.

He was beyond blown away by your artistic talents. You can sketch killers from memory and Dwight always finds himself in awe of how detailed and accurate the drawing was. You were so creative and special, the thing he was never. He looked to you and saw everything he could never be or never was. But you didn’t shove your achievements in his face, you didn't flaunt your talents like some egotistical morons would. You were humble and his compliments never went straight to your head. You looked so good when you were kind and modest. He liked how ordinary you were regardless of how awesome you appeared to him.

You’d often ask to draw him and he would blush and look away. Why would you want to draw him? The most boring of all the other survivors. But you were insistent and eventually, he’d cave. If only you had a red pencil because his cheeks were always hot and flushed. He could never make eye contact with you while you worked on him so expect a lot of side profiles or closed eye portraits.

In trials together his heart would all but break at the sight of you getting hurt. Whenever he’d hear your cries as you’d be slammed onto a meat hook he would gasp and practically feel something inside him cry out along with you. You were too good for this. He was a nobody, a weak, pathetic nobody who deserved to be in this purgatory because he was too scared to try and live a normal life. This was his punishment for being so forgettable. But you... he just couldn’t understand it.

Once he had jumped between you and your pursuer taking the hit and aggression while you ran off to go heal. For once in his life he felt happy, he felt as if he had finally done something meaningful and good. He had saved you. He would have died for you as well but you never let that happen. He watched in utter shock and disbelief as, against all odds, you went back for him. You pulled the man off his hook and with shaking hands you pressed his head into yours. Both your foreheads with touching and you had your hand at the back of his head.

“Don’t ever do that again.” He felt you waver and suddenly he realized that you were scared for him. He felt your urgency and terror and it was all directed towards him and his safety. He could have cried.

Dwights not the brightest bulb in the pack so forgive him but it will take a while for him to realize that you were insecure. He just assumed that when you started isolating yourself from him that it was because you had found someone much better than him. But he noticed that your hands still shook whenever you’d see him in pain and you would always be by his side the moment he needed help. You still cared for him deeply and he could feel it through your desperate actions and your desolate expression.

He walked over to your spot at the campfire. No one was near you, all were chased away by your depressing aura. You were dark and dying, everything around you was heavy with despair and sorrow yet he pushed through it all. He clawed away that thick fog and finally came to rest by your side. You didn't even look at him as he approached.

“Y-You don’t draw anymore.” No response. He hesitated unsure of how best to comfort you. He looked over and saw your hands. They were so small and gentle yet they produced such amazing things. He missed seeing you alive as you worked, the happiest you had ever been. He reached out and took your hands in his. This was the most forward he had ever been with you and it caught you by surprise. You turned to face him and you saw pain in his eyes.

“I-I’m sorry.” he paused and looked away, ashamed. “I’m sorry I took so long to notice.”

Dwight really did feel sorry. He felt like he had abandoned you, leaving you vulnerable and alone with the true killer; yourself. This time you felt his hands shake.

Dwight wasn’t much but he was yours and he loves you. And he loved you so much to maybe even make up for your own lack of self-love. You sighed and rested your head on his shoulder. He was enough.

“Please draw me again. I-I promise I won’t look away this time.” How could you refuse him?

Jake Park

Jake’s a simple man. He knows the silence of the world and prefers it to the company of people. So when you start to hang out with him or show interest in his life he is pretty unresponsive. He expected you to eventually lose curiosity in him and leave him alone with the woods. But you didn’t.

You’d follow him around, asking questions and receiving minimal answers. You would ask him what to draw and when you were done he would just glance at the sketch then nod or huff. He was certainly a very difficult and cold man.

You would draw many things for him, be it crows or plants or sometimes even killers. And he would always show an extreme lack of interest in them. So you decide to stop showing him. The two of you would sit in a quiet spot in the woods, you sketching and him wondering why you were still trying so hard to be friends with him.

You were working on a portrait when you were, without warning, whisked off into a trial. You quickly shoved your art into your pocket and set to work trying to escape. Jake was in the trial with you and you gladly worked on gen with him. Minutes later everyone was dying and only 2 generators had been lit. It wasn’t looking so good but the only thing you were worried about was your precious item in your pocket. It was something that you were really proud of and, to be dead honest, it was one of the best pieces of art you had made in a long time. You were afraid to die and lose it. But... it really didn’t look like you were getting out of this one.

You caught Jake in a corner, injured but not making a noise. You approached him and he reached out ready to tend to your wounds. You shook your head and crouched next to him trying to catch your breath. Your hand went into your pocket and pulled out your folded artwork. he eyed it unsure.

“I know you don’t care about my bad drawings but,” you held it out for him to take. “please, this one’s for you.” You quickly ran off, too embarrassed to be there when he opened it.

He was frozen for a moment, confused as to what just happened. He did care about your drawings. You were talented and he really enjoyed when you included him. Why would you think that he wouldn’t like them? He turned his attention back to the paper. With a bloody hand, he carefully unfolded it and was shocked to find a portrait of him. It was so beautiful, delicate lines used to define his face and his far-off expression and for a second he couldn’t believe it was him. It was so well done. How could you be ashamed of showing him this? He loved it. He looked up and saw you run off and his heart run with you. He was suddenly hit with his suppressed love for you. You were patient and kind and your small stature always made him wonder how anyone could hurt something so cute. He escaped that trial along with your picture. He, unfortunately, couldn’t save you.

Later at your spot in the woods, he approached you. He presented your art and you gasped. “How’d you get that!?” You reached out to take it back. “I’m sorry! It’s...” your cheeks flushed with embarrassment. He must think you are such a creep, drawing bad pictures of him without his knowledge.  You clutched the paper to your chest and felt a wave of hot insecurity flood over you. But Jake never let you drown.

“It’s really good,” Jake said, his voice the most emotional and vibrant it had ever been. “I’m sorry if I never expressed my appreciation of it.” He put a hand on your shoulder. “You’re really good... to me. And,” he paused letting go for a moment and taking a deep breath. “I’m sorry I’ve been so distant. Thank you for sticking around.” It wasn’t much but it was the best he could do. There was a deep-rooted honestly in his confession and it pulled at your heart.

It wasn’t enough to make you feel better but it was a start. With Jake, it is a journey of recovery, not a once-off end-all fix. But he was good at consistency and was always there the moment your fears reared their ugly heads. He was warm and solid, grounding both himself and you in the world.

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #314

“as above, so below  /  what you reap is what you sow  /  what you give comes back threefold  /  as above, so below”

What do you do for work? I'm currently unemployed. I only get paid now and again to do pictures for people. What would you ideally like to do for work? I'd love if I could just be a photographer. What are you doing in order to achieve this? Practice and shoving my extreme discomfort about it aside and trying to promote myself where possible and not in an overbearing manner. What do you think is the worst being on the planet? "Rapists, pedophiles, abusive people in general." <<<< This. Anyone who disrespects the existence of other and equal people. Have you ever been arrested? If so, what for? No. How big an age gap is between you and your siblings? My immediate sisters and I are two years apart. My half-siblings, I don't know. I don't have their ages memorized, but I do know 5+ years, some even 10. Do/did your siblings cause trouble? Not really, we were good kids. What's your dream vehicle? I don't really have one. Are you good at taking care of your finances? What finances? And I don't mean that happily. What's your favorite comic strip? I don't have one. How many people have you texted today? Zero. Someone cheats. Second chance? Nope, byyyyeeeee. Thoughts on kids? Clay that I'm not playing with. Are you a risk taker? No. What are you listening to? I'm currently going through a phase of playing The Evil Within 2's theme nonstop, jc. Is/Was your high schools dress code strict? Not like, mega strict, but it still was overboard. No spaghetti strap shirts, and I even once got in trouble for wearing a floral mesh shirt, despite having a normal tanktop underneath it. It was weird, like no one had ever had a problem with it before, it was just this one teacher that I passed in the hall. Who was the last person to request you on a social media network - and did you accept? Someone I didn't know, so obviously not. Who was the last person’s vehicle that you rode in? Mom's. Who was the last person to make you laugh or smile, and why? Another current obsession of mine: John Wolfe, another let's player who I think is super funny. He said something that made me snicker before I turned on music and started this. Who was the last person that you took a photo with? My half-sister while she was visiting. Who was the last person to pay you a compliment, and what did they say? In group therapy the other day, one of the other women told me that even if I don't believe it, I bring so much positivity to group and she was really happy to be there while I am. I was so so super flustered but flattered, too. Who’s the last person that you visited in the hospital? My mom, following her surgery. Who is the last person that you lent money to? Actually today to Mom. What was the last food that you ate? I warmed up a burger for dinner. What did the last pair of footwear that you wore look like? They're just black flipflops. What was the last kind of bread that you ate? Just plain white bread. What was the last app that you downloaded to your phone? Oh wow, I never do this. I want to say it was a game for my niece. When was your last work shift? I haven't worked in a long time, so idk. When is the last time that you had trouble falling asleep? This is literally every single night. When was the last time you saw a significant other? I ain't got one'a those. When’s the last time that you took a risk? What was the risk? Well, I did say I'm not a risk-taker... Where was the last place that you went on vacation to? You know, how long does it have to be to be considered a "vacation?" I would say not since I went to the beach with an old friend, but it was literally a day. Where was the last place you got lost? uhhhhhhh Why did your last relationship fail? We need to work on ourselves before we could properly support each other and stay in a healthy mindset. Why did you leave your last job? I couldn't handle the stress of serving people and having so many responsibilities at once. How long has it been since you last visited a doctor? How about a dentist? I literally went to the doctor today because I had a follow-up appointment about my weight gain again. I haven't been to the dentist in a few months; I had a normal cleaning my last visit. How big was the last fish you caught? Oh boy, this is stretching years back. It was probably something small, idr at all. Give me the first initial of your last name? D. Something in your home that’s on its last leg(s)? We just moved here, so nothing that's a part of the house itself. As far as items we actually own, idk. Where do you purchase most of your clothes? I haven't gotten new clothes in so long, idk. I would probably say Hot Topic. Describe your skincare routine. I don't have one, if I'm being honest. I just shower. What’s your typical morning routine look like? I don't have one of those, either. The only thing that's consistent is going to the bathroom, eating, and taking my meds. Even brushing my teeth, the time of day when I do that (if I'm not leaving the house) varies. Then it's time to just binge stuff on YouTube and do whatever on the laptop... Are you still playing Animal Crossing? I've never played it, actually. How has the pandemic specifically affected you? It's caused a lot of stress worrying about my mom falling ill, given her being immunocompromised. It's also held me back from searching for another job (even though I don't know what I'd go for, anyway...), because I absolutely refuse to risk bringing Covid into this house by leaving it daily or whatever. What is your main source of anxiety? Being mentally ill, really. It just affects a lot. Any bands or artists you’ve recently discovered? Not very recently, no. What kind of games do you play on your phone? Just Pokemon GO nowadays. Do you have a specific aesthetic? It varies. I love dark, gothic, and gory stuff, but then I also love everything pink and pastel?????? Pastel gore is especially where it's at. Describe the moment you realized you were falling in love with someone. I'd rather not. What’s your favorite sparkling water brand/flavor? I've never even tried it before. What’s your favorite makeup brand/brands? I don't wear nearly enough makeup to be even remotely familiar with any. What’s your all-time favorite movie? It'll probably always be The Lion King. Do you have any subscription boxes? No, but they're cool. What fictional creature would you like as a pet? On deviantART today I actually discovered a fantastic artist who does a lot of HTTYD fanart, and I would say as a dragon lover, Toothless would be soooo great. Have any local businesses closed that you’re sad about? I'm certain tons have closed, but none come to mind. How do you feel about TikTok? I don't feel anything about it. Did you/do you still have a Neopets account? Haha I've had like... two or three at different stages in my life. What were you doing at 9 o'clock this morning? That's actually when (virtual) group therapy starts. Are you wearing any jewelry? Yeah; my piercings (if you count them) and then two rings that I always have on. Are you good at hiding disappointment? No. I'm bad at hiding my emotions because they're so strong. What happened the last time you cried? lmaooo I was finishing watching a The Evil Within 2 LP yesterday, and like, the last hour or so of the game just rips me apart. I was hoping so bad that my mom didn't pass by and ask what the problem was. What would your parents be surprised to learn about you? Both would be stunned to know the situation I had with Joel/my former best friend's boyfriend when I was around 12. What fictional character do you have the biggest crush on? dARKIPLIER Where would you live if you could live anywhere in the world? When all things are considered, like laws, seeing family, etc., somewhere in Canada, or maybe Alaska. Actually, Alaska would be really cool. What after school activities did you do in high school? I didn't have any, if you mean like, school sports and clubs. I did do dance once or twice a week, but it wasn't tied to my school. What’s the last book you really loved? I positively adored The Handmaid's Tale. If you could have been a child prodigy what would you have wanted to be skilled at? My writing was seen as very exceptional for my age as a kid, but it still would've been awesome if it was even better. If earth could only have one condiment for the rest of time, what would you pick to keep around? Uhhh I guess ketchup. I use that the most of all options. What is the scariest experience you have ever had? The night of the breakup. It was such an impossible concept to me that I genuinely thought my life was over, that I'd pull the plug at any moment. Who is a non-politician you wish would run for office? Oh, hunny, Markiplier lmao. Call it a bias all ya want, but he's just a genuinely incredible person that cares so much for everyone and is so serious about equality and just being a good person. Do you think it’s important to stay up to date with the news? It's very hypocritical of me to say, but yes, regardless. Do you own plants? If so, what kind of plants? If not, would you like to grow any? I've never been into growing plants, honestly. Is there a city that you have a particular fondness for? If so, what city is it and why? No, not really. When was the last time that you acted impulsively? Is this a common behavior for you? I dunno, I've gotten better at this. I probably said something I shouldn't have. If you received an allowance as a kid, what kinds of things would you buy with it? Were you more the type to save up for something big, or spend it on little things? I didn't get one. When you cuddle with someone, how do you prefer to position yourself? Would you rather be held, or do the holding? Or both? Are we sitting or lying down? Either way I think I have a tendency to lay my head on their chest while hugging them, and my legs generally curl up. If I'm upset, I definitely feel better and just a greater sense of safety if I'm the one being held, but if the roles are swapped, then I like to be the one doing the holding because I know that's what I want when I'm upset, so treat others how you wanna be treated, y'know. When you woke up today, did you find unread messages from anyone? No. Have you recently told anyone that you miss them? Yes. Can you recall the last time you turned down an offer, of any kind? Mom asked if I wanted to come with her to Ashley's a few days ago, but I said no. I wasn't in a social mood at all. Is there anyone you interact with every day on social media? No. What was the main character's name in the last fictional book you read? Sunny. Have you ever been rejected by a church? No. Is your family nice to you? Yeah. Are you comfortable with your gender? Yeah. What was your favorite Mary-Kate and Ashley film? I don't remember; we had a couple, though. What was your favorite book you had to read for school? The Outsiders. What was your favorite Nickelodeon show? ngl, I don't remember a lot of them and don't feel like looking up a list. Do you still live in the house you grew up in? No. Which Spice Girl was your favorite? I don't remember their names. Do you think you look the best you've ever looked? Oh hell no. Have you been hurt by religion? Yes, honestly. In Truth or Dare, would you rather choose Truth or Dare? I always choose "truth." Have you ever had more than one crush at once? Yeah, I think that's perfectly normal to feel, even for someone monogamous like myself. Just when you establish a relationship, then it's time to make a choice. What social issue do you care about most? This is hard to say with how passionately I hold my opinions, but probably LGBTQ+ rights. It's just... so disgusting to me that I was once homophobic. It's like I want to make up for it. Just the idea of being repulsed by love just because someone has "the wrong thing" in their pants is just... appalling. When was the last time you read a Bible? Many, maaaany years ago I started reading it, but I didn't get very far at all. Do you own a Bible? I personally don't, but I know Mom has one, maybe multiple. Do you discover new music regularly? No; I very much stick to what I know. It's great when I do, though, given that that's how I find new songs to repeat to the grave. What does your first name mean? "Of Britain" or something like that. What country do you live in? U.S.A. Do you believe that gays are born that way? Uh, yes? Who honestly believes a homosexual would *choose* to be in the discriminated minority? People are murdered and abused for simply their sexuality; no sane person would "choose" to risk that torture.

[ambitionsource]

Any Asher Lucas head canons I really love their friendship?

hello anon i am back as promised with the second half of answers to the lucasher asks i got a handful of weeks ago!! seeing as its the tail end of asher’s appreciation day, i am here to deliver on discussing their friendship

so to start, i would say that marking dylan as an outlier and not to be counted (especially on asher’s end), both of them would without a doubt call the other their best friend. asher flexes a bit on this, as jade is also arguably his bestie, but for lucas there’s absolutely no contest. asher is his best friend -- he even said so in 209, which took a lot of emotional vulnerability for him to manage to verbalize -- and that title really means something to him.

to that point, though, i think it took the events of s2 for that to really cement. as we know, lucas has issues with connecting with + trusting others, and so he kind of keeps people at arm’s length. i think asher has always been a bit of an exception to this rule (which i’ll explain in a bit), but lucas was mentally able to still keep him removed emotionally in his mind bc he was like... you know, his inferior in rank / his lieutenant rather than an equal. i don’t mean that he like thought of asher as inferior, because he doesn’t -- lucas hates himself so he thinks everyone is better than him anyway lmao, but he’s also had a lot of respect for asher -- but there was able to be this... mental barrier in his head, if that makes sense. but when asher finally stood up to him, multiple times (in 207 with their argument and then in 208 when he Truly put his foot down and basically walked out of his life), that put them on equal footing on all levels and broke that barrier in his brain. and, thusly, is part of the reason lucas was suddenly able to articulate it in the following ep

but, on that note, one thing that i think makes them such good friends is that they’re both very like... not mushy. at least, not with each other. they both don’t mind side-stepping more complicated emotions and just assuming things are unspoken but understood, but are getting better at knowing the moments where something should be said

but they’re like equally weird about the same stuff, like they both don’t like birthdays + being paid attention to on their bday bc they don’t know how to process it (sans the exception of dylan, who of course asher will allow to be extra on his birthday), so they will straight up just like not tell each other happy birthday on their bdays and people are like doesn’t that upset you?? did he forget?? and they’re like no actually lucas / asher is my favorite person bc he ignores my birthday fDSJLFKGSJKGLJSGL like... they’re so fucking weird

asher is constantly trying to improve lucas’s fashion sense + design sensibility and it does not work. like nothing sticks. asher will spend an hour casually (but actually very intently) telling lucas about the nuances in color between shades and then later when he asks him a question about which shade of red they should use in the set design lucas goes “idk they look the same to me just pick one” and asher is like. bitch ur jokin... it’s lowkey funny that he keeps trying tho like lmao

so in terms of asher being slightly different than others even early on, the way this most manifests is that i think for whatever reason, asher feels safe to lucas. its an inexplicable thing, and something i dont think lucas even really realizes consciously. but he starts their friendship being like oh i’m gonna protect asher the strong must protect the sweet this lame nerd needs me, but then what it actually ends up being is more that lucas needed asher. like yes he gets asher to loosen up and let out more of his authentic self, but asher gave lucas a friendship to anchor to, someone who seemed to genuinely like him not because he was reckless or cool but just because of who he is. and even when he fucked up, asher still seemed to believe he could be better / saw him as more than that, and lucas had never had anyone in his life before like that, let alone someone where it felt that way (i.e. dylan also sees lucas that way especially now, but something about asher just made it so pointedly clear)

and how this ends up changing things is that lucas finds that like... he wants to talk to asher. he wants to be real with him, not put up the defensive, aloof façade. so you have lucas going to convince him to sneak out freshman and sophomore year so they could hang out just the two of them (a thing featured briefly in the “younger” sequence in 208), and those were the moments where he got in those conversations. and asher liked those nights too because they made him feel special, like all the people lucas could choose to hang out with and he chose him to bother and coax out into the night... for a kid like asher, younger than everyone else and an anxious mess and nerdy and he knows it, that’s like. the craziest thing ever. so those one-on-one hangouts meant a lot to both of them, though for different reasons

what’s nice too is that their friendship definitely matured and grew with them the longer it lasted, because there was an element of hero worship on asher’s end and almost belittling underestimation on lucas’s end when their dynamic started, but then it grew organically past that. and when they actually got to know one another, for all their complexities, it made them better friends. and now those misconceptions are long gone, but they still hold a lot of respect for one another.

also to this point, i do not remember if i’ve said this yet on the blog or not but so major point here -- asher was actually lucas’s first (and only, pre-riley) crush. being demisexual, he has to form a deep emotional connection with someone before he really falls for them (riley being semi the exception to this because even though he didn’t really fall for her until they became friends from the get-go he was like okay so she pretty....... whatever tho idc like uh huh sure lucas). and like late in freshman year, maybe even early that summer, lucas and asher had become pretty good friends and were spending a lot of nights hanging out together and talking, and one of those nights they were talking about something semi-serious, and lucas was just looking at him and just realized like wow hm i could kiss asher... and then he was like WAIT HUH?!?!?!?!?!?! cause he’d NEVER had thoughts like that before and suddenly he was having them about his best friend, and that best friend was dating his other good friend and it just FREAKED him out he was like HELLO BAD WEIRD WRONG??? so he stifled that deep down and lowkey ignored asher for like two weeks until it passed -- which of course made asher worried he did something wrong or pissed him off, but thankfully that passed without much commentary or further discussion. lucas has mostly forgotten about it now.

that being said, if you ever told asher he was lucas’s first crush, he would never ever believe you.

they really enjoy discussing / debating each other, especially since lucas is truly equally as clever as asher, but it’s a really careful line because one wrong comment from either of them can send them tipping into actual argument bc they’re also very good at pushing each other’s buttons. this is why dylan’s presence is extremely helpful at keeping them balanced.

and this is kind of a key trait to their best friendship, which is that they make awesome best friends, but my god they would make TERRIBLE romantic partners. they cannot communicate when it really matters (especially about stuff that makes them embarrassed like romance, which they can barely do with their actual partners); they push each other’s buttons; they love each other’s flaws as friends but would drive each other crazy as lovers. like the people they’re with for love are exactly the people they need, understanding, soft, patient, and good at communicating. if lucas and asher dated, they would kill each other within the first week.

one of the first times dylan, asher, and lucas really hung out as a trio involved “wilding” asher, which meant dressing him like lucas and getting him to be more reckless and freewheeling for an afternoon. they didn’t do anything crazy, but lucas let asher borrow one of his t-shirts and snapbacks for the occasion. asher still has both buried in his closet, mainly because he keeps forgetting about it but also because there’s a sentimentality to them. not that he would ever ever wear them again -- yuck. asher would rather vomit

it should not be understated that the first people lucas verbally said i love you to were asher and dylan. it’s important. don’t ever forget it.

-- Maggie