#Anyways back to working on homework!-
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Good afternoon gamers! Hope you're all doing well! As for me, I wanna design so badly but alas...😔 I lack the time
#pan rambles#Also heads up everyone!! I'll probably be extra busy this month#IRL stuff is gonna make me a little extra busy-afjsnfjsndj#(Tired Panchi noises can be heard in the distance)#but that aside#Man I really have so many s/is to draw...#I got my H.i-f.i rush Panchi...my 2 Yakuza s/is...Colored Reference for my J.udgement s/i..#I have a little animatic of my DRRR s/i amd Shizuo that I started and got too busy to continue#I'll finish it eventually! I just don't have the time-afksnfknsdk#Any free time I do have is gaming bc it at least doesn't tire out my hands/wrists as much as drawing does#Anyways back to working on homework!-
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new lioden king except ive had him for a couple weeks :-)
#my art#lioden#his name is halo era (or just halo LOL)#HIIIIII im really gonna try to pick up activity again. or aim to at the very least. classes started back up this week and i'll be spending#lot of time on campus. ive got a loose plan to start reading wc again so we'll see if i can hold myself to it#and if i end up not doing that . then ummmmmmmm oops x_x#speaking of campus i really think im gonna have a good semester but i just need to adjust to the change in schedule#ANYWAY really enjoyed drawing him <3 worked on this for a few hours off and on instead of the hw i desperately needed to do LMFAO#its good to know some things never change. like my relationship with homework. and drawing BAHAHA#anyway if u guys want my lioden info please let me know O7
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it was hot at work, i was hot at work, i forget the rest
#hi#me#my face#selfie#cute girl#i am in a TERRIBLE HORRIBLE FOUL little mood#but anyway#penguin socks#wombats#girls who lift#girls with tattoos#pretty people#i accidentally caught a bee yesterday???????#in case you needed something to talk about#be my friend#message me#we are all friends here#I'm hoping homework will fix me#which is an odd thing to think but god something that's to#okay#i love yall#love me#hot girl shit#i did eventually stop sweating and go back to work#happy weekend#later taters#and we've already seen this so let's not act like we're brand new thank you
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Fuck all of y'all in Florida how dare you misrepresent my liberal king that man loves women (not in that way) and he would not STAND for this smh
#yk damn well he'd make the vague but absolutely not vague threats and then actually follow through on them#HE WOULD NOT MISS!!!!!!!#anyways this week has sucked so bad dear god#the cold I've had for a month has apparently been pneumonia#And I coughed so hard I TORE A FUCKING MUSCLE in my ribs and I could barely move for days and had to sleep in a recliner#also finally got diagnosed with adhd but found out all my old teachers told my mom they think I have it and I should get tested but NOOOOOOO#SHE DIDN'T WANT TO DEAL WITH IT#there literally couldn't have been a clearer sign than when I almost failed fourth grade because I couldn't turn in my homework on time#The election obviously my immediate family are full Kamala but my grandparents are VERY Trump#Oh and my brothers therapist told us he apparently has the most severe case of executive dysfunction he's seen in his 30 years of working#He literally told us to just take him out of college and let him live at home forever because he won't be able to finish school#because of it so THAT'S gonna be fun since my dad said if he ever tries to come live back here he'll throw him out on the streets#THIS IS JUST IN A WEEK#WHO IS MY OPP I DON'T KNOW WHAT I DID BUT I DON'T DESERVE THIS FANFIC WRITER ASS LORE#LEAVE ME ALONE 😭#red vs blue#rvb#rooster teeth#rvb florida#election 2024
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Why is this such a S1 Jancy song to me?
#I CAN TELL JUST WHAT YOU WANT? YOU DON'T WANT TO BE ALONE? YOU'VE KNOWN IT THE WHOLE TIME? YEAH THATS THE BLORBS#neither of them want to be alone and they know it deep down (especially in Jonathan's case)#yeah I'm having thoughts about jancy while working on an very soon to be due assignment so what?#I just really needed to get this thought off of my chest cause ive been having it for MONTHS every time I listen to it#anyways time for me to get back to my homework now!#stranger things#jancy#Spotify
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Wohoo animation update I guess wow cool fast paced camera pan stuff wowwww
#man I just wanna#I just#I can’t anymore with#*dies from exhaustion*#okay but funny enough I made RAPID FIRE progress on this sequence particular#because it was just a sketch outline two days ago before I said ‘screw college homework I’m just gonna animate lol’#ahahah I have the final math exam on the 25th#so like uh….also two days from now#ironic how that checks out I sacrifice two days for animating and then I’m going BACK IN THE FUCKING BUILDING AGAIN#….that was a meme reference hope someone caught onto that#sorry if I sound disjointed or overly frantic here it’s because I am#usually I spend an hour trying to formulate my words into something insightful but nah not anymore#I can’t be bothered to be put together it’s way too much right now I just need to explode#like the DAMN POTION EXPLOSION EFFECT I HAVE YET TO FINALIZE AAAAAAAA#anyways if I keep pointing a middle finger at college then I’ll get this whole animation done in no time <3#things is I’m hella proficient at getting work done it’s just school always robs me of the time and makes me appear lazy#THIS is what I can accomplish in the span of two days back to back work#and I just wish it could be like that all the time is all#hplonesome art#a hat in time animation#ahit animation#ahit animatic#wip animation#massive project
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Girl who rear-ended me left me on read for a week after I sent her an estimate and is now claiming she’s not the one who did the damage. Lmao
#(laughing bc otherwise I will scream and cry)#still don’t have her insurance info so I will either need to get her to hand it over or get law enforcement involved#which I should’ve done in the first plave#especially since she refused to give me her insurance info#but whatever#she’s saying I should just let her go through my insurance so SHE can have a cheaper deductible… girl#first of all you don’t even know what MY deductible is#second I don’t know that you’re actually gonna pay it bc you sure don’t seem like you want to#and third why would I care about you saving money 😭 you hit my car and are trying to lie to me about it!!#ALSO fourth that’s not even. how this works. like. the insurance companies are supposed to decide that between one another#sighhhhh#anyway. waiting for the bus and then I’m gonna go get groceries#I need to cope (eat chocolate) and I don’t have any at home 💔#also I have homework due tonight fml#I just spent like five hours in opera rehearsal#AND I still need to figure out what I’m gonna text this girl back. I’m gonna wait til I get home probably#ellyposting
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i love doodling swapinverse like hello drawing characters aside from the normal mtt is lowkey therapeutic 🧡🧡🧡 anyways i FINALLY FINALLY finished crash's lore!!!! and vice.SER is connected to him,,,, theyre interconnected!!! i forgot how much i liked crash's design (not the design but all the little gimmicks in the design. figuring out all the hanging ribbon bits is annoying but hey it looks good)
#outertale does not exist in swapinverse anymore. how quaint#dude thalia and melpomene are th only ones that r like. 100% good#I NEED TO MAKE MORE GOOD AND NICE CHARACTERS😭😭😭😭#mst..... recreators (qip name 4 siphon n crash?) and vice.SER........ theyre all EVIL (or have evil goals)#i WAS thinking doing something with reaper because i adore his design and aesthetic and i wanna combine it with SOMETHING idk what#anyways if core frisk error which is supposed to be vice.SER exists then should normal core frisk exist too?????#i mean i dont think that just because a core frisk role esque person exists doesnt mean the role is instantly filled up#the mst and mtt co exist in swapinverse but those 3 are like.... NORMAL aus. not outcodss n stuff#i love the giant lance thing i gave crash. i mean the ribbons can form any weapon and take any shape (kinda like puella magi mami's guns)#but like..... it just is so cool i love characters that use multiple weapons#i LOVE (haha) every single little gimmick thing i give swapinverse characters. the tiny details is what i adore giving them#if you catch me not posting 4 a bit its probably just bc im working on swapinverse or jk fashion au. or maybe ive seriously just lost motiva#anyways i have a few banger rants in my drafts ive yet to elaborate om but just like....... i dont feel like it#someon needs to wrangle those posts out of my tired lazy arms#lowkey why do siphon and crash remind me of kanade and mafuyu. idk i cant explain#if you cut vice.ser in half it would be like jelly with binary in it. i wanna eat him#he would tingle on my tongue but thats just the static. eating yhe glasses would be difficult bit they dont have lenses so its ok#i drew them both looking at us but i think that vice.ser is the only true one always looking at US.looking out from inside#god i love swapinverse sooo much i wish i could get it done faster and be goatedly good with motivation. a shame#but i do think that i may be finishing up the character descriptions 500% ish sure#SO THEN THAT MEANS I CAN WORK ON THE ACTUAL STORY!!!! WOOOOO#ive already decided that theres gonna be mentions of me myself and i in it. i love meta storytelling#im cursed with perpetually sweaty hands i hate having to draw on slighty damp paper. nobody understands me#UGH im getting too happy in life im starting to act weird in public and offering to help people. i need to stop#anyways just school doodles!!! because in the period where they take our phones i have naught to do but draw#i need to get back (start) my english reading. and then help my friend with a few questions on her homework. how joyous#and then i can get back to my BETTER homework (working on swapinverse :3)#crash managed to destroy outertale in his lore i wonder how many worlds vice.SER will destroy#actually if hes supposed to be core frisk error then i should make him NOT destroy worlds right???? right#tricule rant
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I love you education system!!! come here so I can give you a biiiig kiss WITH MY RAZOR SHARP TEETH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH GNASH
#did homework for 15 hours today /srs#because my teachers are incapable of setting a normal amount of work#over the weekend#long weekend? no worries!!! just set twice as much work!!!!#robin shut up challenge#I'm really upset and beat up everything hurts#my eyes my back my neck my joints#god. my brain#cried a lot#autismcore#I have at least 4 headaches right now#this is not normal!!!!!! I am 16!!!!!!!!!!!!!#you as a teacher should not be setting enough work to make a 16 year old break down and be in constant pain for 15 hours!!!!!#anyway. ok to reblog#vent tw#caps#ignore the tags and reblog /g please. spread hate for education system
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Guys I think my brain is telling me I should redo and draw a brand new “Meet the Artist” pinned post.
I think it’s a good idea cuz my style has changed from the last time I drew it, AND I think I could be more expressive ✨✨
Should I do it? 👀
#I’m really thinking about it and I think my brain is right 🤙#I can’t do it right now because of school- AND THE FACT I’M GETTING HOMEWORK the MOMENT I got back-#Seriously first day was just Spanish and Math homework it was INSANE 😵💫😵💫#Anyways what was I gonna say?-#Oh yeah I might do it on Sunday. Unfortunately I can’t draw on Saturday since my mom is gonna take me to work with her. 👁️👄👁️#At least I get to see her cool work friends so that’ll be nice!#Rambles#(?)
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torn between going up to my bfs house to surprise him and watch a movie with him in person instead of online tonight or if that would just make him feel stressed
#im like ok this is what I would want if this situation happened to me#but what does he want. idk the man is an anxious mess#hed be like oh no i have to feed u or oh no u need to be doing ur homework or whatever .#i could pickup food on the way 🤔#im just thinking about it like he only lives an hour away that was really nothing when i lived in wyoming#wed drive three hours to places on a saturday and back home all the time#it is a busy time for him work wise so i dont usually stay over bc we wouldnt get to see each other#but like we are gonna take a break to watch a movie Anyways . why not in person#jordan talks#someone help me out here should i just do it lmfao#tbf i havent even started sketching my project thats due tuesday .
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Inktober: day 10 - Nomad
Decided to go with a Kazakh theme because of their strong nomad culture (and because its my family’s culture) and asked my dad for references because he was the best person to ask about this, so he sent me a picture of himself in a Kazakh chapan that I gave to Jose because this is still Josetober (he looks so minimalist)😍 (will redraw this properly in an undetermined future)
#this is so rushed I’m so sorry I was working on homework and realised I had less than half an hour to make something before midnight#so many things to do I can’t wait to be more organised#thank you father for the last minute assistance#I will definitely redraw this because there’s no details and there’s supposed to be so many prints#I want to make my dad proud but this is not it-#anyways back to work now 😔
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sorry i am soo chatty today for some reason
#anyway. back to the work+homework grind. trying to push out this fucking. infographic about paper document preservation done before i leave#.txt
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pro tip: if you think you have adhd then don't start a master's program before you even get a diagnosis (also you need a stronger prescription, you have astigmatism, and reading glasses aren't gonna cut it)
#i can handle one class just fine but 2 classes??? im killing myself#im working too so its like i never have time for myself and its just a neverending well of assignments and work plus i hate the schedule#why is everything due at 10:59 and why is it due in the middle of the week but i have to come back the next 2 days and write responses#one of my classes will trade out a disucssion for the week with an assignment thats due at the end of the week and i like that sm better#the other class makes use do a discussion and an assignment in the same week#and usually they're all due at the same time so i go to work and then go home do my homework and then do more homework on the weekend#then go back to work do you understand my problem#anyway my mom casually confirmed that i have astigmatism recently which ???#but my eyesight is fine but driving in the dark is hell and its not b/c of the dark!#any kind of bright light blinds me like it could be a sunny day and i won't be seeing shit for that entire drive omg#just realized that this might be the cause of an increase in headaches wait...#ok back on track: adhd consultation (maybe) in a month and a half!#i don't have a therapist so im hoping my doctor can help? or at least refer me to somebody that can help b/c looking is hard omg#where the therapists at omg#moon posts#long one today because i am procrastinating so i can give up <3
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it’s not fair that so much of my memory and cognitive function is tied up in something I cannot control or reasonably prevent
#blue chatter#EMDR therapy is genuinely helpful#but I’m starting to hate how much it impacts my ability to function afterwards#I don’t wanna feel like my consciousness is detaching from reality like a moist sticky note after every session#I don’t want to have gaps in my memory for hours afterward#it’s not fair that other people inflicted all these traumatic experiences onto me#and now I have to process them and suffer the consequences#I told my therapist today that I’m angry at myself for not being able to spin enough plates#that if I had just been more attentive and had more energy and worked on my homework like I should have#I wouldn’t have suffered nearly as much from the deep distrust and constant surveillance academically#and if I hadn’t been so easy to manipulate and groom#my parents wouldn’t have had a good reason to violate my privacy and read all my text messages and browser history#I’m angry that I never earned my right to privacy#and I’m angry at my brain now (even though I know it’s unfair)#why can’t I just process this like a normal person#why do I have to have all these new scary symptoms I’m not used to#why can’t I just get therapy and face my traumas and anxieties and get over it quickly#and I know that’s unfair. and I’d never say that to somebody else.#I just want this all to be over with. I want a life where I don’t just stop functioning once a week.#I hate having to write off the rest of the day after a session because nothing gets done#and my brain turns into goo and I feel floaty and spacey and strangely unable to move or think#it’s not usually like I can’t respond at all. or pay attention. it just takes so much effort. and my body and brain feel strangely heavy#and clumsy. like I’m walking in a mech suit or something.#I want my brain back.#but I know that getting it back means doing this work now#which sucks and I don’t like it. esp since I don’t know for sure that this will ever go away.#it’s scary to lose memories of important events and lose chunks of time and feel like I can’t trust my own version of events#how can I know if I’m being gaslit if I cant trust my memory already? it terrifies me that I’m so vulnerable#anyway. rant over. sorry y’all.
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They should invent a French that is easy to understand
#hi hello uni is Going#i'm managing just about with the workload and having loads of fun too#and i know that it's good if i find stuff challenging cus that's kind of the point and it gives me guidance on how to improve#but man i sure wish it didn't take me 40+ mins to do a listening comprehension because i cannot comprehend what i'm listening to#this is an ungraded thing as well but i have to do it for my homework completion grade - i'll deffo need the 10% it'll give me#anyways back to work 💀#ellis exclaims
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