#Anyway it’s 2AM I’m going to sleep loll

[cameroneatsdirt]

RAGEQUIT RAGGHHH 🔥🔥 always been fond of Iterator ships but this one in particular has decided to latch onto me like a parasite. Urghg I love their dinamic sm I love themmm live laugh ragequit uhh happy pride month??

[marleysfinest]

   After arriving at London Gatwick following a spur-of-the-moment booking, Reiner stretched his tired frame as he stepped off of the British Airways flight that had just landed from Vancouver. His neck pillow clung to him haphazardly and he heaved a hurriedly-packed duffel bag over his shoulder as he and the other passengers shuffled towards immigration and baggage claim. His body clock was shot - in his head, it was 2am, but the blinding, 10am sunshine told him otherwise, and while he’d managed to sleep on the plane, his head and eyes felt heavy as they yearned for rest. 

   He made it through immigration with ease, and was soon restlessly twitching his leg as he waited for his suitcase at baggage claim. The dusting of sleepiness had cleared thanks to the fluorescent lighting and excessive air-con, and Reiner’s thoughts had returned to seeing Marley, who was waiting on the other side of the wall at arrivals. Or, rather, was waiting in her car in a pick-up bay. She’d messaged him just after landing saying that the arrivals hall was busier than they’d anticipated, and to avoid an unwanted media-frenzy, she was going to wait in the car just outside. 

   On sight of his silver Samsonite suitcase, Reiner all but barged the waiting travellers out of the way so he could haul it from the carousel and head for the arrivals hall, feeling thankful that he’d chosen a four-wheeled case that glided with ease and, most importantly, speed. He dodged a small number of paparazzi by raising his hood and ducking his head, and upon seeing Marley’s car parked in the pick-up bay, ran full tilt, forgetting his prior tiredness. He threw his things onto the back seat before excitedly climbing into the passenger side of the black Mercedes G-Class, immediately leaning over and cupping Marley’s face to pull her into a forceful kiss. Marley giggled her way through it, ever moved by Reiner’s apparently uncontrollable affections, and the two of them smiled at one another wider than they had done in a while. 

   Click. 

   Everything fell right back into place as Reiner fastened his seatbelt, and Marley began to pull away from the airport. It perhaps wasn’t the best idea to drive - what with at least ninety minutes ahead of them as they drove to Marley’s London bolt-hole in Battersea - but Marley knew that Reiner couldn’t have stomached being folded up on a train, even if it did cut the journey time, not after such a long flight. She didn’t mind, anyway. In her mind it just gave them time they wouldn’t have had otherwise.

   “How was your flight?”

   Reiner’s head lolled back against the headrest as he turned to look at Marley; she didn’t have to take her eyes off of the road to know what expression he was making, and she couldn’t help but laugh. 

   “Come on!” she pleaded, “Business class on British Airways can’t be that bad, can it?” 

   “Mar.” Reiner’s voice was surprisingly stern, although he was still smiling. “I got put next to this greasy businessman who did not stop smacking his lips after throwing peanuts in his mouth the entire flight. Whenever this guy was awake he sounded like a… bulldog, or something.” 

   Having had a good night’s sleep and not just endured a nine and a half hour flight, it was easy for Marley to find the humour in the situation. She pouted her bottom lip.

   “Poor baby,” she mocked, “time to start flying on a private yet, although I have to say, I’m fond of a peanut on a flight…”

   “Stop,” laughed Reiner as he gently hit Marley across the arm, “you made your point. Go back to asking me about my favourite colour, or something.” 

[fanmoose12]

Found your account at almost 2AM and it was the first thing I thought of discovering in the morning. And look at me now, it's been almost an hour and I can't stop scrolling down cuz IT4S JUST SO AMAZING. Can i request some levihan angst AU about one of them being tortured then getting saved by the other one? Thank you for your magestic writing

ok, so it's set in modern setting but the events are similar to the uprising arc in canon???? anyways, i hope you like it, take care :)

Hange watched, disinterested, as a big burly man picked up a large knife and then crouched next to her.

“I would advise against it.” Hange noted nonchalantly.

The man stared at her, dumbfounded. “You would advise against what?”

“Doing that,” Hange nodded at the knife. “Hurting me.” She added, when she saw that her previous words didn’t help to clear the fog in the man’s eyes.

The man gave her a feral smile. “Really?” he cocked his head to the side. “Do tell me then why I shouldn’t hurt you.”

“Well, you do know who I’m married to, right?”

The man gave Hange another confused look, and Hange was honestly surprised by that. So he wasn’t one of the thugs, who kidnapped her so they could get their revenge on Levi? Was she kidnapped because someone actually needed her, and wasn’t just looking for the way to hurt Levi? Well, Hange thought to herself with a grin, that made this whole situation less humiliating. Even if Hange got caught like the biggest fucking idiot. Although, in her defense, she hadn’t been sleeping for the last two days, too engrossed in her research, and it made her less aware about her surroundings. However, Hange knew that this explanation wouldn’t work on Levi. Oh, her husband would get so furious, Hange could already picture his angry little face, with his eyes narrowed dangerously at her and his angry voice shouting at her to be more careful.

Hange returned her gaze to her kidnapper, squinting suspiciously at him. “You really don’t know?” she asked, just to be sure.

“Lady, I don’t give a fuck about who you are married to,” the man growled. “The only thing I care about is the location of Erwin Smith. Which I expect you to reveal for me.”

Hange wanted to shout in triumph. She loved Levi and their marriage was one of the best things that happened to her, but sometimes it was really hard being his wife. Levi was a cool strong man, who beat up bad guys on a daily basis, and Hange loved him for that! She admired his strength and his convictions and how he was willing to sacrifice even his life to help other people. But. Every fucking criminal in their city thought it would be wise to kidnap Levi Ackerman’s wife just so they could screw with him. And Hange really hated to be the damsel in distress. She knew how to defend herself, and she was fucking good at it, but, sometimes, well, sometimes, like in this particular instance, she became too absent-minded to notice two guys following her through the dark alley. She didn’t notice them until they jumped right onto her, pressing a chloroformed handkerchief to her nose. Ah, well, no big deal. Happens to everyone.

Hange gave the man a big, toothy smile. “Listen,” she began cheerfully. The man stared at her with wide eyes, obviously shocked by the sudden change in her behavior. “I would really, really, like to tell you about that, but,” if Hange’s hands weren’t bound behind her back, she would have shrugged, but now she could only bat her eyelashes at the man, feigning innocence. “Unfortunately, I can’t do that. That’s classified information.”

The man growled in frustration, and grabbing Hange by the hair, he punched her hard. Hange’s head lolled to her side, but surprisingly the blow didn’t hurt as much as she expected. Did he go easy on her?

“Tell me where Erwin Smith is!” The man demanded angrily. He held Hange’s shirt in his fists, putting her face close to his. As he began shouting at her, Hange felt the smell of his breath. Eugh, she thought, now she kinda understood why Levi was such a clean-freak. The man reeked and it was disgusting.

“I don’t know where he is!” Hange exclaimed, deciding to change the strategy. “You took the wrong person, I’m just a scientist, I’m not involved in Erwin’s secret plans!”

“Don’t play dumb with me!” the man shook her again, looking furiously at her. “I know who you are! I know everything about you!”

Hange smirked, cocking her head to the side and regarding the man with interest. “Do you?”

“You are Hange Zoe, a researcher and lead scientist in Erwin’s Smith agency called “Wings of Freedom”. You are his right-hand man and I’m sure he doesn’t need to tell you about his plans, as more than half of them are devised by you.”

Hange couldn’t lie to herself, she was impressed. She thought he was just an amateur, but this man actually knew a lot about her, in fact he knew too much.

“And yet you have no idea who my husband is,” Hange raised her head and looked at the celling. It was dump and leaking. “A grave mistake, really.” She sighed.

“I told you I don’t care--“

“But you should,” Hange cut him off. “If you value your life, of course.”

“Oh?” the man raised his eyebrow sarcastically. “Then please tell me who your husband is.”

Hange grinned at the man. “Does the man Levi Ackerman ring any bells to you?”

It was a fantastic sight. The man palled immediately, his eyes widening in shock and his gaze filling with fear.

Hange’s grin grew wider. “You know, how angry he would get? Oh, he would get so angry with you, he would be furious!” Hange snickered, watching how the man slowly swallowed. “No one likes when Levi gets angry, well, I do like it, but only because sex with angry Levi is amazing. But I don’t think you’ll enjoy what Levi would do to you. You stole his precious wife, after all, and believe me, he loves me very much.”

To Hange’s surprise, her threats had a diametrically different reaction. She probably went too far, because instead of being scared, the man, like a cornered animal, got angry. He grabbed Hange by her hair again and punched her for the second time. That hit was much stronger than the first one, splitting Hange’s lip and throwing the glasses off her face. They fell to the ground loudly, the sound of broken lenses filling the room.

“That was your second mistake,” she told him grimly, spitting out the blood in her mouth. “You broke my glasses and that was the third broken pair this month. Now you’ve made me angry too.”

"Oh, and what are you going to do?” the man gripped the knife in his hand tighter. “Need I to remind you that you are currently tied up to a pipe in my basement. You are bloodied, alone, and completely at my mercy. And besides,” the man made a show of looking around and squinting into darkness. “I can’t see your husband here, whoever he is, so you better be a good girl and just tell me the truth.”

Hange lowered her head, her hair falling to obscure her face. “I can’t.”

“Why not?”

“Because… Because then Erwin will get angry with me. And I hate when he does that. He always scolds me like some school teacher, like… like an angry math teacher!”

Hange suddenly remembered her high school math teacher, she had hated the man, and she was sure that the feeling was more than mutual. A sharp pain in her shoulder, however, reminded her that she was getting distracted.

Hange looked to her left and saw that the man’s big knife was now stuck in her shoulder. She gritted her teeth to stop herself from crying out. She was Hange fucking Zoe, she wouldn’t let some amateur asshole have the satisfaction of seeing her scream in pain.

“I’m fucking sick of you!” the man shouted. “Just tell me the information so I can finally kill you!”

Hange threw her head back and laughed. “Really shouldn’t have told me that. Why would I tell you anything now?”

The man tore his knife out of Hange’s skin. He began playing with its edge, regarding Hange with thoughtful eyes.

“I’ll give you one more chance,” the man said finally. “I’ll give you an hour, so you сould reconsider your answer. And I’ll give you a little cut,” he grinned, showing his knife. “To give you some motivation.”

Hange met his amused eyes with icy cold stare.

“You can do that,” she said in a low, dangerous voice, baring her bloodied teeth at the man. Her injured face and crazy eyes made her look almost feral and the man took a step back, terrified but unable to look away from Hange. What kind of man this Levi Ackerman was, if that scary woman was his wife? “You can also shoot me, strangle me, hit me again, whatever tortures your tiny mind comes up with, but no matter what you do, no matter how much you hurt me, I will never, ever betray Erwin’s trust.”

The man felt sweat gathering on his forehead and his hands began to shake. He gripped the handle of the knife harder. He was sure that whoever sat in front of him, it wasn’t just a woman. Looking at her, kneeling on the dirty floor of his basement, her eyes ablaze with fury, he wasn’t even sure she was a woman, that she was a human at all. She was a monster, a fucking demon, and he cursed himself for taking this job.

But there was nothing he could do. If her husband was even half as dangerous as this woman, it meant he had to finish his business quickly and then run fast and far. But before running away like a goddamn coward, though, he needed to give his boss the location of Erwin Smith.

So, holding his favorite knife securely in his grasp, he plumaged it deep into woman’s stomach. The sharp edge pierced her soft flesh like it was nothing. The woman kept looking at him with the same fierce glare, her face never changing, as though she didn’t even feel the pain.

The man staggered shakily to his feet, kicking woman’s leg with his as he stood over her.

“I’ll ask you again in an hour.” He promised before leaving her alone in the dark cold room.

 Hange sat on the damp floor, surrounded by darkness. She wondered how much time has passed. To her it felt like ages went by since the man shut the door after himself, but surely it couldn’t be more than an hour? The blood was oozing from the wound on her stomach, forming a pool under her legs. Hange smirked grimly, things didn’t seem to go very smoothly for her right now.

Hange couldn’t help but wonder: where the fuck was Levi? Usually it didn’t take him a lot of time to find her, beat up all the bad guys, and then heroically save her, all the while grumbling about her stupidity.

Suddenly Hange remembered. The day before her kidnapping. She told Levi not to wait for her in the evening, saying that she had a deadline on her research project and there was a lot of work at the lab and she would probably sleep on the couch in her cabinet. But as Hange spent her day in the lab, it turned out that there weren’t many things left for her to check and re-check. Moblit volunteered to finish the rest and so Hange decided to surprise Levi and come home earlier.

Yeah, surprise him she did.

Feeling her head getting dizzy because of the blood loss, Hange wondered: could it be that Levi didn’t even notice her disappearance? A chill ran through her spine as Hange’s head filled with unwanted, panicked thoughts. She already lost a lot of blood, and even if she can survive that, the angered man would return and then surely kill her. She needed to think how to escape, because telling him about Erwin’s location was definitely out of question. Even the threat of death wouldn’t make Hange betray her friend. 

Before Hange could start planning her escape, the door of the basement opened. After sitting so long in the dark, Hange was blinded by the bright light, coming from the corridor.

The man walked up to her slowly, taking pleasure in watching how pale Hange was and how labored her breaths were.

“Ah, you don’t look so good, honey,” the man smiled all too sweetly at Hange. He crouched next to her again, and his loyal knife was held tightly in his palm. “Do you want my help?”

Hange sneered at him. “Go fuck yourself.”

Suddenly, Hange heard something. The sound was quiet, almost silent, and the man probably didn’t hear it. But Hange did. And she recognized it immediately. After all, she would be a pretty bad wife, if she didn’t know her husband just by the sound of his footsteps.

The man didn’t notice anything, didn’t even seem to see the grin that spread at Hange’s lips. He raised his hand, as though to grab Hange by her chin. Levi was at him in a second, sizing his giant head in his hands and then quickly snapping his neck.

“Fucking scum.” Levi spat out. “Wanted to touch my wife with his filthy hands.”

Levi stared at the dead body for another second, before turning his attention to Hange.

“What the fuck, four-eyes?” Levi asked angrily as he went behind her back to untie her hands. “It’s the third kidnapping this month. The third. When will you get your head out of your ass and finally start noticing when people are following you?”

Hange chuckled, relief and happiness making her head spin. Or maybe it was the blood loss. Well, part of it was definitely due to the blood loss, but she was really happy to see Levi.

When Levi was done with the ropes, he took Hange’s wrists into his hands and gently rubbed the bruised skin. Still holding her hands into his, Levi came to sit in front of Hange.

His brows were furrowed in annoyance, as he was probably still angry at Hange’s carelessness, but his eyes showed how worried he was for her.

Levi’s breath hitched as he finally took notice of the extent of Hange’s injuries.

“It looks worse than it actually is,” Hange was quick to assure him. She didn’t want Levi to faint.

Slowly, with trembling hands Levi grabbed the end of Hange’s shirt and lifted it up. He cursed when he saw a wide gushing wound that ran through Hange’s stomach. His grip on her shirt tightened, and Levi turned to glare at the already dead man.

“Oi, Levi,” Hange gently touched his cheek, making him look at her. “He’s already dead and can’t do any harm to me. Besides, the wounds don't hurt that much.”

“Your hand is cold.” Levi grumbled.

“What?”

“Your hand is cold,” Levi repeated in the same gruff voice. “It’s always warm and now it’s cold, so don’t fucking tell me you are fine. If I hadn’t arrived in time, if I hadn’t called to check on you in the evening, you would have died, Hange.”

“But you arrived in time,” Hange gently smiled at her husband. “I’m still alive, because you saved me, just like you always do.”

“You saved me first.” Levi muttered under his breath and carefully approached Hange, kneeling beside her.

Hange put her hands around his neck, and then Levi put his hands under her knees, slowly lifting her up.

The moment Levi’s warmth enveloped her, Hange’s eyes closed and she drifted to sleep.

 The first thing Hange noticed upon waking up was the feeling of someone’s hand tightly clutching hers. The second thing she felt was the smell of antiseptics. Judging by the soft bed and the annoying beeping of the machinery, Hange guessed she was in hospital.

She slowly opened her eyes and sat up. Her shoulder and stomach hurt a little, however the moment her eyes landed on the familiar mop of black hair, all uncomfortable feelings were replaced by immense love and adoration Hange felt for that man. With her free hand, Hange touched Levi’s head, her fingers immediately tangling in his soft locks. Levi’s head was on her lap, as he fell asleep in the hospital chair.

“Idiot,” Hange whispered fondly, looking at her husband. His whole body would be sore, when he wakes up, but Hange didn’t have the heart to disturb his peaceful slumber. It wasn’t often that Levi slept so soundly and the recent events probably tired him out.

“I tried to make him go home, but he didn’t listen.” Hange heard a familiar deep voice. She whipped her around and smiled when she saw who was sitting on the other side of her bed.

“Erwin!” Hange exclaimed, trying to keep her voice as quiet as possible.

“You haven’t noticed me, until now, huh?” Erwin chuckled. “After so many years of marriage you two are still so in love with each other, it’s impressive. I tried so hard to send Levi home, but he stubbornly refused to leave your side. Even Moblit agreed to get some sleep and come back in the morning, but Levi didn’t budge.”

“Ah,” Hange gazed at her husband tenderly. “He sure is a stubborn one.”

“Don’t say it like you aren’t the same. I swear you two were made for each other.” Erwin gave her a fond look, before his eyes suddenly turned serious. “Forgive me, Hange,” he said, laying a hand on her shoulder. “I got you involved, and by trying to keep me safe you’ve got hurt.”

“Oi, stop it, Erwin,” Hange’s eyebrows furrowed in annoyance. “I’m a big girl and I can handle myself. And you didn’t get me involved, I got involved myself, so don’t you even think of blaming yourself.” Hange looked sternly at Erwin. “I forbade it.”

Erwin laughed, his hand squeezing Hange’s shoulder with affection.

“Levi obviously doesn’t share your feelings. When he found what that guy was after, he got so angry with me, I thought I would lose another arm too.”

Hange looked away, embarrassed. “Sometimes he worries too much.”

“Because he loves you.” Erwin told her softly. “So do try to stay out of trouble, Hange. You don’t want to become a widow, because your husband had a heart attack, right?”

Hange laughed. “Yeah, that would be quite troublesome. I mean, it would take some time to find a new husband-”

“Oi!” Levi tightened his hold on Hange’s hand, as he raised his head and glared furiously at her. “What was that shit about a new husband?”

“Levi!” Hange cried out in surprise. “I thought you were asleep!”

“I was. Until you two started blubbering.”

“Were you eavesdropping on our conversation?” Hange asked with a sly smile.

Levi rolled his eyes. “I was just giving you two idiots some privacy to talk about your feelings and shit.” Then he narrowed his eyes at Hange. “And you’re avoiding the question, four-eyes.”

“What? It was just a joke, Levi!” Hange threw the hand, that wasn’t held in Levi’s grasp, in the air.

“Do you already have someone you’re planning to marry after my death?”

“Of course, not!”

Levi looked at Hange closely. “Is it Moblit?”

“And yep, it’s time to take my leave,” Erwin announced, rising up from his chair. Neither Hange, nor Levi paid any attention to him, too busy glaring at each other.

When Erwin disappeared behind the door, Levi huffed.

“Fine,” he said, sighing. “You can marry Moblit after my death. But only if he takes good care about you.”

Hange turned away from him, pouting. “You’re such an idiot, Levi.”

Levi moved closer to Hange, pressing a soft kiss on her cheek. “And yet you still love me.”

“Unfortunately, I do.” And even though, Hange’s voice was still annoyed, her eyes, when they finally looked at Levi, shined with love.

Levi stared at Hange’s face and his hands involuntarily clutched into fists.

“Is it that bad?” Hange whispered.

“Not worse than usual,” Levi replied absent-mindedly, his eyes tracing the bruises on Hange’s face. “I killed that bastard too quickly. Should have let him suffer for what he did to you.”

“You’ve killed him and saved me,” Hange said softly. “That’s enough, Levi.”

“Doesn’t feel like it,” Levi admitted.

He put his hand on Hange’s cheek, his thumb caressing her soft skin. Hange smiled at him and leaned into his touch.

“We will be fine, Levi.” Hange promised, looking deeply into Levi’s eyes.

“As long as we are together.” Levi agreed, placing a tender kiss to Hange’s lips.

[atopearth]

Collar X Malice Part 5 - Yanagi Aiji Route (including Criminal Chapter & Mini Review)

Time for the best looking guy Yanagi!! Okay, usually my favourite looking guy is never the route I like the most but we'll see how it goes! He's even got his own common route! Anyway, lmao at the glossary on Enomoto's relationship history, I find it hilarious how it says he's still haunted by the memory of his kindergarten teacher crush being married😂😂😂 HAHAHA, no wonder why Sasazuka doesn't have a good impression of Enomoto. Even on their first meeting, Enomoto gets his profession wrong and then he calls him tiny LOL. Way to be straightforward, I can imagine Sasazuka killing him in his mind already. On the other hand, Enomoto being a starstruck kid with Shiraishi's profiling job is so cute lol. Lmao at Sasazuka and Enomoto being nicknamed the Miso Soup Duo by Shiraishi because Enomoto calls Sasazuka seaweed, and initially Shiraishi called Enomoto Enoki loll. I'm really liking all the guys' first meeting! Especially how even though Sasazuka thinks Enomoto is an idiot, but could also understand and feel his sincerity towards the X-Day cases when they asked Enomoto what his motivations were. Well, it seems like Yanagi failed to protect someone a long time ago and that haunts him to this day, so I can see why he was so anxious over Ichika, and then so relieved to see she was alive (when they first met)🤔 I always felt like Yanagi knew Ichika, but it kinda got brushed to the side so I forgot, but now that he's actually asking her, I wonder where he met her... Yanagi's goal is as sweet as he is. To a certain extent, I have to agree with him that having a normal everyday life where you can talk with friends, eat what you want, go to work and then sleep soundly at night is something we should all be able to have, so Adonis taking that away from the people in Shinjuku makes him strive to return these "normal lives" back to the people. I guess that's understandable, I can't imagine the amount of stress all these people are under tbh. They're all stuck in Shinjuku, every adult has a gun, terrorists are everywhere with murder cases rampant, and the more cases that are discovered, the more the police's powers are questioned, as well as the discovery of more and more corruption within the police. No one feels safe, everyone wants a bit of their normal lives back so they try to live "normally" but at the same time it's not really their life because they're restricted, they're scared and they don't know if they'll even survive by the time X-Day comes. 

Anyway, Yanagi is really so gentle and caring. Considering how patient Yanagi really is, it's kinda amusing how much he can't stand Okazaki lol. LMAO when Ichika asked Mukai and Sakuragawa if they were questioning her relationship with Shiraishi because they were interested in him😂😂 I can so imagine their absolute disgust lmao. Even though Kazuki doesn't have the best attitude, you really can't fault him for his sentiments. If December really is the last month they'll all get before X-Day then yeah, it would definitely be worse being stuck at home feeling too scared to go out and missing out on actually living your life, and honestly it's true, I mean that guy who was the game developer got killed at home, so really, staying at home doesn't guarantee your safety, the only thing that guarantees your safety is if you're not targeted and no one will really know if they are until they're about to be killed. When Kazuki said no one has never done anything wrong in their lives, so there's no guarantee that any of us could be safe, it really resonated with me because he's right. Everything has done something "wrong" at least once in their lives and Adonis is judging them for it on their own terms, meaning no one knows if they'll get judged or not because it's not like Adonis is very clear about what kind of people they target. I guess despite Kazuki's brashness, he does think quite a bit about Shinjuku's situation. But yeah, I don't blame Ichika, like dude, Kazuki goes out at 2am?! Yep, I'd be super worried. Anyway, one of the things I hate the most about starting a new route again is having to experience Kazuki and Ichika's bad relationship again. I honestly feel so hurt for Ichika every time he shouts at her saying she doesn't care about him, when he just doesn't notice that even though she's been busy and neglected him to an extent, she always makes sure to do stuff like make him breakfast, dinner etc and tries to communicate with him in the time she does have, whereas he has never made the effort to try to reach out to her and understand her life or situation. Honestly, if he ever just worried about her considering how much danger she's in as a police officer right now with Adonis and all the other crap going on, I would probably be less annoyed by how rebellious he is but really, he still aggravates me because of how inconsiderate and harsh she is. Anyway, I'm glad Ichika called Yanagi to go with her to check on Kazuki, and it was so nice of him to immediately come out to help her. Lmao when he asked Okazaki if he was there and he really was following them😂 HAHAHA, when Okazaki asked Ichika for her phone number and she looked at Yanagi to see if it was okay, and when he said yeah, Okazaki was like yay he got her dad's blessing lmaooo. Yanagi really is everyone's dad😂

How interesting though! Mochida and Ichika joining Investigations HQ to help out with the X-Day cases! I can understand why Ichika is so desperate though, honestly I always thought Ichika was never desperate enough in the other routes hahahaha. Ooh wow, so Yanagi couldn't shoot a criminal during his time as a policeman, and I guess that's probably related to this traumatic past and also Ichika's. Anyway, it's good that he puts a lot of weight to every life and doesn't believe in taking that away from a person, but yeah it would have been hard for him to continue as a policeman like that. Awwww, Ichika, Yanagi and the lost little girl holding hands looking for the girl's mother was sooo cuteeee!🥰🥰 I really liked how talking to Yanagi motivated Ichika to be more frank and honest with Kazuki and tell him what she couldn't before, as well as apologise for always just lecturing him and not trying to understand him. The CG with Yanagi touching her forehead checking if she has a fever and stuff after her "nightmare" was so pretty!! Yanagi has such beautiful CGs like dang, I love them all. Anyway, so great that she got to wake up to Yanagi's face hahahha, and food prepared by him too! It must feel pretty bad for Ichika...she so honestly told him she wanted to know more about him and be a proper partner with him for the investigations and he rejected her and pushed her away.. 

Akito's plight always breaks my heart. But hearing him so honestly telling Ichika that not only has he recently finally realised that what he hated most weren't the people who harassed his sister but instead himself, and then telling Ichika that he really really regrets joining Adonis, I couldn't help but feel so much pain for him. It's also because of Akito that makes me think that no matter how much I think those people who died in a sense "deserved" what happened to them, what Adonis does for people like Akito will never truly help them with what they truly need and want in their lives after what they suffered. Adonis only takes advantage of them and their weaknesses to do their personal bidding for their own personal revenge against society. No matter how pretty they make it sound as a rebirth of society and from corruption etc, all they're doing is using all the people who need the most help to hurt themselves and others in a pursuit of hatred and revenge. It also makes me think of Sanjou, that even though Adonis supposedly "helped" him with stuff like his revenge etc, in the end Sanjou didn't feel anything more from it than wanting to die. However, it's also undeniable that despite the result, I'm sure a part of these people would be relieved to have been "saved" by Adonis, and probably don't regret it like Akito. I mean, Sugawara Rika's torment was one that Adonis really helped to erase. One thing I always appreciate about Akito is that Kazuki's dreams and trust in Akito is always what makes Akito have the determination to go against Adonis, so it really makes me happy how much their friendship means to them and how much they cherish each other.

I was so happy that Ichika was there to help Yanagi continue to believe in his principles that you don't have to sacrifice people to save others, and that there can be ways to resolve situations without killing. I'm just happy that he didn't need to compromise himself in a state of confusion. As for Yanagi's past, it's something difficult for him to take considering even if it was ruled as self-defence back in the day (when he killed the guy who captured Ichika when she was young) it doesn't change the fact that he killed someone, so I'm sure that weighed heavily on him. I don't think many people would be able to stay the same after experiencing something like that. Just as Yanagi was saved by Ichika's words and could finally overcome a bit of the fear he had in shooting someone, him telling her how much he appreciated her encouraging him and helping him also relieved her of her own trembling fear in shooting in a real field and not just for target practice. I thought it was so cute how Yanagi admitted it was "his lost" and that he wants Ichika as his partner and wants to work hard together now. I'm not surprised that what happened at the Tokyo Metropolitan Building with the hostage situation was something Yanagi encountered before and that's why he found it difficult to face again, especially since in that incident, he continued to negotiate with the suspect even though he had orders to shoot him, and in the end the suspect got violent so others shot him anyway. Honestly,  I'm sure that Yanagi understands that it must feel like naivety to want no one to die and not just prioritise "innocents" and "victims" knowing the danger that "criminals" can create especially when you're planted in such a situation, but I can understand a bit of Yanagi's sentiments. Tbh, it has always unsettled me whenever I think about criminals dying, and I understand that there are situations where it can't be helped, especially when it puts so many other people in danger and I would never arrogantly think that these people "could have done better" because I'm sure most people would rather not kill someone if they had the choice to not, but yeah digging into the thoughts and emotions of "criminals" have always been something I've been curious about a lot of my life. And of course even if we just capture criminals, we could probably never really "understand" why they did what they did anyway, but I do naively feel that as long as we keep trying, maybe we can find ways to create less of these situations where so many people wouldn't have to be so "hurt" and turn to crime. Of course, this would probably only apply to some "criminals" though since if crimes only stemmed from people who were hurt somehow in their lives, then things would probably be much simpler, but instead people's lives are complicated and what they choose to do would never come about from just one or two things that happened to them.

Anyway, considering Yanagi's thoughts, I agree with his decision to leave the police. With such doubts in his mind, I don't think he would be able to do what is expected of him, so instead of endangering others with his indecision, he might as well leave or take a break. And coupled with his desire to protect everything and new directives to prioritise shooting criminals performing acts related to X-Day, there's no way Yanagi would be able to stay with the police. And with that, I'm glad that Ichika was the one who was able to make Yanagi realise that alongside these ideals of his, he would still need to shoot people, even if it's not to cause death, but to protect others by disabling them from being able to cause danger. I think it's nice that Yanagi finally feels like he's actually moving forward from his fear of hurting people excessively. But yeah, seeing the past incident from Ichika's and Yanagi's perspectives was pretty daunting in the sense that Yanagi must have felt really bad that his actions caused the kidnapper to become violent with Ichika, and he felt responsible for needing to protect her and save her even more. His reckless and thoughtless actions led to that, and because he was "weak", he knew that if he wanted to protect Ichika properly, he needed to do everything he could to save her, and that meant killing the guy to make it impossible for him to do anything to them anymore. Yanagi was only a high school kid too, so that must have broken him so much. Ooh the kidnapper guy isn't dead, he's the guy in a coma that Yanagi has been visiting for 10 years! I'm surprised that no one took Yanagi to a therapist even if it was ruled as self-defence and he was a minor... It's so adorable how Yanagi was so concerned about whether Okazaki hit on Ichika, he had to message her again in the middle of the night after talking about the serious stuff before lol. I'm not sure if I'm being super suspicious but I feel like Mochida is a part of Adonis haha, sorry if I'm wrong since he's so nice😅 Saeki is expected since I kinda got spoiled haha but I've always wondered about him ever since he said in the beginning of the game that he admired Ichika's ideals or something haha. I'm glad that Yanagi told Ichika that just because Saeki is most likely the one who collared her, she doesn't need to think or deny everything she knows about him, and that if she wants to believe he has his own reasons, she should hear those first before thinking that everything was a lie.

I'm kinda shocked at how ruthlessly Saeki poisoned Ichika with the collar...but I guess I shouldn't be surprised since there were other times he killed her in those bad endings... Anyway, Mikuni's mother being a part of the religious cult that was kinda where Adonis originated is interesting...I wonder what exactly is the difference between Mikuni and Saeki now that Mikuni is willing to discard Saeki to save himself and his other followers? It's so nice of Kazuki care so much about Ichika btw~ Those moments are always so nice and worth it. On the other hand, as usual, Yanagi's CGs are so so beautiful! I love how upfront they are with each other with wanting to hold hands and get some physical support from the other. They're so cute~ It's interesting how Saeki has the same goal as Yanagi, which is to restore normal everyday life to everyone, but I guess mostly for the "weaker" people who have been oppressed and he'll just destroy the other "evil" people who interrupt that peace. Well, aside from it being problematic that he'll probably kill a lot of the population depending on what he regards as evil, but I can understand his sentiments to an extent. If most of the people he wants to get rid of are like people who "destroyed" Sanjou and his other colleagues' lives, or all those stalkers that basically made Sugawara paranoid and crazy, then yeah definitely understandable, but I still think people like Fujii are worth turning things around for. Yeah, Fujii made a lot of mistakes, abused his power and connections, oppressed others to elevate himself, and it's understandable if the ones involved like Isshiki and Ogata never forgave him, but seeing him sincerely regret his actions and want to repent, and continuously go to apologise to Isshiki and do what he can to make amends makes me believe that Saeki obviously thinks everyone is irredeemable. Fujii was terrible, and he can never give back what he took, but he had the potential again to give to others what he gave Enomoto, and I think that's something only someone who has learnt from their mistakes will much more appreciate in doing imo anyway.

Mikuni and Saeki seem much closer than it felt from the other routes, I guess that makes it all the more saddening that he died in Shiraishi's route. Sometimes I wonder if it's more saddening to be Mikuni, the person who has been so close to Saeki all this time and still not feel like he had truly understood him, or would it be more saddening to be Saeki and feel that Mikuni has been by his side all this time but still not really understand what he really wanted? I guess it's sad for both sides... It was really sad to see Mukai cry over Shiraishi, I honestly still feel like she's a better match for Shiraishi than Ichika but that's not important right now haha, but I do enjoy seeing how much it affected Mukai and how much she respects him even if she hates him at the same time lol. I'm so happy that Yanagi finally properly responded to Ichika's feelings!! I'm happy that he's finally come to terms with the idea that he can be selfish and happy as well, like it took a while, but it was honestly worth it with how the confession and everything went, it was so adorable and it really felt like Yanagi could fully desire a future with Ichika. Aww, I love how even Sasazuka made time to come to Enomoto's Christmas party (well Yanagi made the food though but yeah lolol). HAHAHA, I love how Yoshinari noticed something was going on with Yanagi and Ichika (when she told him to stop smoking so much since he's been smoking even more these days), and so Yanagi admitted to it by kissing her on the cheek in front of everyone hahahahaha! It was so funny how Yanagi was blushing after doing that lmaoo. And I died when Enomoto screamed that Yanagi was so cool😂😂 I love how supportive Enomoto is all the time, and I guess Sasazuka as well with his tsundere-ness lol~ Yanagi calling her Ichika instead of Hoshino was so cuteee~ Anyway, I'm kinda disappointed with how Saeki was...handled? Like, considering how much it was the core of the story for Ichika to be the one who was supposed to in a sense "truly understand" and succeed Saeki's ideals, I honestly wanted to hear more of what Saeki desired. Like yeah, he wanted to erase all sorrow and honestly it's understandable, especially when he said to Yanagi and them that there are people who are too weak to be like those who are "strong" and can continue to face forward and power through their "sorrow", because really, if everyone really could soldier on through their sorrow, then no one would be truly "unhappy". Anyway, I just felt it was pretty underwhelming to have Saeki to be the "mastermind" but he probably has less screentime than the other villains in the other routes lol. Otherwise, Yanagi giving a ring to Ichika was so adorable, I love how literally everyone is so curious about their love that they would all go to peek on them lmao. The other endings are pretty interesting, but honestly wayy too short to really feel anything about them. I think the crazed Ichika that wanted to lock up Kazuki and Yanagi so that they would never get hurt from Adonis was amusing.

The Criminal Chapter is kinda interesting, but I think they might have been more useful in the chapters themselves than separately, since I feel like, if you felt something for them, then this only solidifies it, but if you didn't, then nothing can really change your opinion of them now. Personally, I've always liked quite a few of them though, so I did appreciate Ogata being fleshed out with the departure of his wife, I think it's more saddening that what caused her to leave wasn't really because she lost faith in Ogata himself but because she couldn't handle the pressure from everything that came from it. But yeah I think that would have made him a more empathised character in Enomoto's route, since I feel like in the route, they focused more on him hating the police and justice itself rather than exploring directly his pain itself, which I think would have made him a more interesting villain for that route. Hana didn't change for me, because it was pretty expected, considering how "normal" her reason was, her obsession and craziness was probably the worst, and probably the most uncomfortable to watch because out of all the victims, Enomoto's relation to Fujii and hearing about his story really made Fujii's death that much more personal. Akito's was definitely really tragic, because seeing Akito's attitude towards his sister before her death, and even calling her creepy like all the other bullies did made me further understand how much Akito hated himself the most. I always feel so bad for Sugawara though, I can't imagine these stalkers scrutinising every moment of her life, hindering her work, all her friends and everything, I honestly think I would want to just die to get away from all that. As for Souda... Honestly, the way Sasazuka captured Souda in his route still kinda haunts me, and reading a bit more about his past solidifies how uncomfortable I felt having to see Souda experience all he did in Sasazuka's route. I know it's not a healthy way to handle things and his problems, but I think by being able to personally understand how much a game could "save" you, and then having that betray you because of something that isn't your fault and then being hated for it really hurt. Shion and Suzune got a lot of screentime in Shiraishi's route, so yeah nothing much to say that I haven't said tbh. 

Something I think I would have really appreciated in Okazaki's route would be seeing more about how Sanjou and the other officers despaired over the physical and mental abuse they suffered at work from their superiors. Sanjou's feelings still got across to me though so I guess it was good enough, but I think it would have nice to delve deeper into how terrible the environment was, and how much hope Sanjou lost because this was the police itself that was destroying them, so where could they even turn? Considering how important Saeki and Mikuni's meeting 10 years ago should have been, and their ideals and everything, it's a bit frustrating to have to see it in this chapter that's not a part of the actual main story. Also, considering how much Mikuni being the prime minister's son was a big deal, and the assassination attempt years ago, you would assume the story would at least talk about the prime minister himself to get a gauge of his image and stuff, but this is also only loosely explored in this criminal chapter lol. But through this, I think I can better understand why Mikuni and Saeki can never really "understand" each other. Which can already be kinda described through their respective lives with Mikuni being strong in the sense that even though he grew up with most things people would wish to have, he chooses to discard all that to fight for a more equal world, whereas Saeki's determination was never something that stemmed from "choice", Saeki's desires seemed to be more fuelled by the pressure of survival in itself, and that's why Mikuni will never be able to understand his desperation, and also how truly personal it is to be fighting for the "weak" who just aren't strong enough to properly fight or do something about their situation, such as his mother. I really liked the CG of all the executors at the end though~

MINI REVIEW Overall, I really did like Collar X Malice. There's a lot of things I felt a bit weird about such as Shiraishi's ending, how boring Ichika became in the second half of Sasazuka's route, lack of exploration into Saeki's character etc, but I still really enjoyed it! I think what I loved most was definitely the individual cases themselves, because exploring police corruption and the unfairness in society by "victims" who felt like they were forced to rely on Adonis to solve their problems and injustice was interesting and emotionally engaging. I empathised with a lot of them and especially liked Akito and Sanjou since something about them really resonated with me, it was probably their sadness tbh. A lot of them lash out in anger towards the "perpetrators" so I think seeing Sanjou and Akito just so "done" with this world and so sad about how they were forced to view themselves, their place in this world and how the world has treated them kinda broke my heart. Honestly, I liked all of them except Hana lol. As for Saeki, I didn't really feel much for him even after getting to know more about his story and relationship with Mikuni. Maybe my opinion might change after I play Collar X Malice: Unlimited since there's apparently an Adonis route lol, but yeah, honestly after all the fleshed out (most of them) "villains" in each route, it's kinda "funny" how shallow Saeki was portrayed imo even though I thought his ideals for helping the "weak" was an interesting idea. Anyway, as for the LIs, this is surprising (and kinda funny) but my favourite was definitely Enomoto. Whenever people mention CxM, it's always about Shiraishi and Sasazuka, so I had no expectations at all for Enomoto but I loved him SO MUCH. Not kidding at all, because every time I read his route, I couldn't stop smiling or laughing because he was so cute, earnest, sincere and funny. He's honestly not even the type I like because Yanagi is my favourite type lmao, but I loved Enomoto to the max. He and Ichika play off each other really well and in a cute way. The funny thing is that usually my favourite type usually has a boring route, but surprisingly I really liked Yanagi's route too! I think exploring Yanagi's weakness, guilt and inability to move forward properly was more interesting than I thought it would be and I really enjoyed how he and Ichika interacted. Honestly, I reallyyyy like Okazaki as an LI but I found his route rather boring until the end lol, and even though Sasazuka was kinda cute and less mean than I thought, I found that the "fire" Ichika had towards others in other routes wasn't present with Sasazuka and it kinda felt like she just followed him around in the second half lol. As for Shiraishi, it's funny how he's so mysterious but has such a "wholesome" route for the most part until the end lol, but yeah anyway, he wasn't my type in terms of looks, personality, story or anything so yeah... Lol. Overall, I would rate the game an 8/10! Enjoyable and probably one of the "better” otome out there with a good story~

[juicifeur]

The Guy at the Bar (Lucifer x reader)

Summary: Lucifer decides to go to a bar and get drunk to deal with his problems

AN: I haven’t written in months, so be kind :)

Word count: 1.1k

One drink after the other, he sat at the bar hoping he would feel numb. His head had begun to feel heavy with drink and when he turned it the room lagged. With his energy in the toilet since becoming more or less human, all he felt like doing was drinking, and plotting his sweet revenge against those good-for-nothing Winchesters.

One of the bartenders brought around another bottle of...something. Her name tag read Stacy, and her shirt clung tightly around her chest. Her hands worked quickly and gracefully with the bottles as she poured him another and took the empty’s away. Not bad. He thought as he sipped. The burn that trickled down his throat was less-so than it had been when he started, but the feeling in his head kept getting lighter and lighter. He hadn’t felt this good since before he lost his grace.

He had never really spent time with humans, considering that he thought they were a bunch of primitive mud-monkeys, who didn’t deserve a lot of what they got. But all things aside, he did appreciate the chaos they caused when using substances like this. Made them fun to watch at least.

   “And then they locked me in a big cage for the ‘greater good’ and it ‘saved humanity’,” He rolled his eyes and drank again. The second bartender, you, nodded along with the story, as you had probably a million times to hundreds of different customers. This guy just clearly needed to talk.

The bar was empty except for your current customer and the other bartender.

   “Sounds like quite the story.” You muttered, cleaning the counter with a damp cloth. It was nearly closing time. The 8pm-2am shift was starting to take its toll and you could feel your limbs slowly starting to lose the ability to work efficiently. All you wanted was to go home and sleep for the next two days.     The only thing that seemed to keep you awake was the man sitting across the bar. He wore dark colours, and they made his eyes look darker than they probably were which made him all the more enticing. Slowly taking him in, your tired eyes wandered over his broad shoulders and stubbled chin. Then you realized his lips were moving, and you had to start paying attention again. It wouldn’t be long before your brain would begin to shut down for the night, taking your inhibitions with it.    “Now my son is stuck with those mutton-heads and I can’t get anywhere near him,” He drank.    “So, I killed a lot of people and tried to destroy the world one time and I’m the bad guy.” Lucifer finished off his drink and looked up at you. Having no idea where this conversation had come from, you just smiled and nodded.

He sighed.

   “Here,” You said, pouring two shots and sliding one to the man across the counter. He looked up into your eyes and smiled softly.

   “I feel like you understand everything.” He lay his chin on the top of his arms on the bar and smiled up at you. At this point, he was very far gone, his eyes sparkling with drunkenness and something evil, but you smiled back down at him anyway. He wasn’t too bad looking, quite attractive in physique; and if you liked the rugged, slightly crazy type, then he was practically a score and a half. He looked like the kind of guy that teaches kindergarten, but apparently had a sex dungeon at home considering how much he was talking about being in a cage. Hopefully never confused the two.

   “I’m telling you, bartending is like therapy with alcohol.” You smiled and proceeded to clean another glass and set it back on its hook.

   “What’s your name?”    “Lu- uh Nick.” Lucifer responded quickly. Remembering that most folks didn’t exactly like to chat casually with the devil, or the criminally insane.    “Alright then, Nick. Anything else you got on your mind?” You took back the shot you made for yourself and breathed out, setting the glass in the sink. The shift was almost over anyway. The man in front of you did the same and handed you the empty shot glass. He shook his head.

   “No, not really.”

   “Well then I guess it’s time for the bill then.” You turned around and started to ring up everything he’d ordered. Hopefully he would still leave a tip.

   “Wait. I gotta pay for these?” He  looked at all the empty glasses that had started to pile up in front of him and you laughed.

Nice smile, Lucifer thought. Would look better on my floor.. No wait that’s not how it goes...     “How many have you had tonight?” You asked, pulling him out of his mind long enough to maintain eye contact.    “Enough.” He puffed out his cheeks and breathed back out, a puff of warm air, scented with enough alcohol to knock out a bear. It would have made you dizzy if you weren’t already so tired. You didn’t exactly know how he was still sitting upright.

Lucifer reached into the back pocket of his jeans for the money he had and put it on the counter, all three dollars and twenty five cents. You stared at him for a moment.

   “Well, I agree. Maybe you should have a glass of water.” You started filling a glass from the tap and he scoffed, his shoulders slumping forwards.

It wouldn’t be the first time that you had to let a customer go without paying. Your boss didn’t like it very much. But from experience, you knew that the hangover only got worse when you woke up and realized how much you’d spent on alcohol.

   “Never understand why you humans drink this stuff. The molecules are so boring, there’s nothing good about it.” He groaned softly.

   “Keeps us hydrated, and it’ll make the headache you’ll have tomorrow a little less nerve-damaging.” You chuckled softly and leaned on the bar as the alcohol started to visibly catch up with the man in front of you.

   “Maybe w’ should get together sometime.” He smiled wickedly and his head lolled to one side for a moment. With that goofy grin on his lips he looked like a cat that ate the canary. You smirked softly, wondering why you found him so attractive.    “Yeah, maybe we can take over the world together, handsome.” You started to flirt back, finding your inhibitions lowered by the attractive man at the bar and his mysterious eyes. “I thought you'd never ask.” The man smirked.

Always Tags: @knightofmischief @potato8queen @sherlock44 @too-much-winchester   @krista200022   @mcdoyle22   @lezbianlovebitez @leiassorganaa @katestiel @kylorentrsh @trashbutnotforyou @angel-allie-golcha-aroha @thedamnchesters @kickasscas67 @hoe-zier @kyara2015 @trustnobodyshootfirst @all-ur-friends-r-dead @rhae-winchester @one-shots-supernatural @spn-ayyy @abigrumple @livelovelike555 @missdestiel67@lemonadegazeelle @elsatxx @superhero-lover101 @jadepc @becs-bunker @calaofnoldor @meangirlsx

Crowley Tags: @boxer-pup

Dean tags: @jesuisdabbo @akshi8278 @sonicscrewdriverandtulips

Sam Tags: @commitmenttosparklemotion @carbonated-beverages @galaxyllamaftw @pilaxia

Cass tags: @jesuisdabbo

Lucifer tags: @jesuisdabbo

Balthazar tags: @jesuisdabbo

Jared tags:

Jensen tags: @akshi8278

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Message me if you want to be tagged/untagged Always accepting tags for Always Tags, or tags for a specific character

REBLOGS, LIKES, and COMMENTS are much appreciated<3

[chongjojunsalsa]

Ice Pops

Word Count: 3079 words

Pairing: Seokjin/Everyone (because i’m thirsty like that)

Summary:

sunshinehobi i don’t know about you guys but that ice pop made my boner pop

[ alternatively titled: Popsicles, because they have a different name for it everywhere I swear]

Note: also posted on ao3, but tumblr is irresistible. come find me or continue reading under the cut!

The tension surrounding the coffee table in the Bangtan dormitory is thick and heavy and not something everybody is willing to wake up at 2am for. An emergency meeting, Yoongi had called it, while frantically knocking on everybody’s door in the middle of the night, his face a shade paler than it already is.

So around the table they sit, muttering under their breath how this is fucking stupid, let me go back to sleep, groggy eyes directing expectant stares at Min Yoongi while he paces back and forth, trying to think of a way to put his thoughts into words without making it sound too blunt. Nobody in their sleep-deprived state seems to notice that Seokjin is not sitting in his usual seat, wedged in between Taehyung and Yoongi, except for Jimin, who raises his hand half-heartedly and mumbles, “Why are we conducting an emergency meeting without Jin hyung?”

At the slight mention of Seokjin, Yoongi freaks. He slaps a hand over Jimin’s mouth with unnecessary strength, wide eyes darting around maniacally, his voice urgent and frenzied as he hisses, “Shut up, he’ll hear you.” Jimin grunts in pain and shoves Yoongi away, eyebrows furrowed in irritation, it’s too early for Yoongi’s bullshit.

Namjoon flattens his lips into a thin line, he knows how Yoongi is when Seokjin stays elsewhere for the night. “Yoongi hyung, Jin hyung isn’t even here, he can’t possible hear you,” he points out and barely manages to avoid the hand coming for his mouth.

“Yah! This is really an emergency!” Yoongi slams his hand onto the table in frustration unexpectedly, startling an already dozing off Taehyung and causing him to tumble off the couch. He glares daggers at Yoongi as he seats himself back onto the couch, a hand cradling the elbow that he’d hit on the coffee table. All of a sudden, the members are alert, it’s rare to see their second eldest hyung this worked up. He wouldn’t act this way unless it were really an emergency. They exchange worried glances and comply immediately when he gestures for them to come closer.

Yoongi has them huddled towards the centre of the table and they wait, at the ready - they think - of whatever he has to say to them. He lowers his voice to a soft drawl, “Have you ever seen hyung eat an ice pop?” All at once, they scatter, profanities rolling off the tips of their tongues in a series of “fuck this, i’m out“s and ”what the fuck, hyung“s. Like Jimin had mentioned earlier, it’s too early for Yoongi’s bullshit. In fact, any time is too early for Yoongi’s bullshit.

“Hyung, you’re drunk, aren’t you?” Hoseok presses the back of his palm on Yoongi’s cheek, to which the latter slaps his hand away indignantly and scowls.

“I’m not drunk, you shits,” he snarls and blocks their way as they try to make their ways back to their respective rooms (read: attempt) with his small stature.

“Let us go and Jin hyung won’t hear a word about this,” Jeongguk finally speaks up, the first words he had spoken since they had gathered around the coffee table, a wry smile playing on his lips. Yoongi’s expression darkens considerably, but he concedes anyway, he won’t hear the end of it if his hyung were to corner him and question him about the emergency meeting he held at 2am in the morning, only to ask the members if they’d seen him eat an ice pop. Truly mortifying.

But Yoongi knows he can’t possible go to war all by himself again, it was already that difficult surviving the first time. He needs comrades, he needs a plan.

suga&spice created emergency meeting. suga&spice invited rapmoney to emergency meeting. suga&spice invited sunshinehobi to emergency meeting. suga&spice invited chimmers to emergency meeting. suga&spice invited taelien to emergency meeting. suga&spice invited seaguk to emergency meeting. suga&spice invited everythingnice to emergency meeting.

suga&spice oh fuck

suga&spice removed everythingnice from emergency meeting.

suga&spice ok hear me out u have to see him eat an ice pop

chimmers so that wasn’t a bad dream

sunshinehobi wtf hyung

taelien yoongi hyung rly wants us to watch jin hyung suck a popsicle off

chimmers ice pop*

sunshinehobi theyre the same thing dumbass

suga&spice how did u know

sunshinehobi that they’re the same thing??? i’m not a dumbass like jimin lol

chimmers bitch

suga&spice no as in that is literally how he eats an ice pop like hes eating d

sunshinehobi oh my god

chimmers youre kidding

taelien LOL R U SRS

seaguk that probably happened in your dream hyungie~~~

suga&spice i texted jin hyung and he said hed get ice cream w us shut up maknae

taelien ice cream or ice pops??

suga&spice hed get an ice pop either way

chimmers this better not be disappointing

sunshinehobi ive always wondered what jin hyung looked like eating d

chimmers ^

taelien ^

seaguk ^

suga&spice dont make me regret this wheres namjoon btw

seaguk still sleeping lol

suga&spice wake him up and meet me outside the dorm in five

“I don’t get what’s so interesting about Jin hyung choosing between Zesty Lime and Cherry Bomb,” Namjoon tells Yoongi blandly, to which he responds with a flick to his cheek - right in the dimple - and an annoyed but otherwise barely audible ‘sh’.

“Wait for it, you impatient fuck,” Yoongi grits his teeth at the other members’ fidgety restlessness. Seokjin was taking his time to choose a popsicle, completely oblivious to the fact that the other members had been hiding behind the shelf in the convenience store, in patient wait for him to just shove it down your throat already.

Shut up, Jimin.

After twenty seconds or so of flirting with the cashier, she blushingly tells him that he need not pay for it, to which he replies with a sly wink and a flying kiss. She looks like she’s about to faint, but immediately tends to the next customer as soon as he shoves a packet of cigarettes onto the counter. Yoongi rolls his eyes, but it’s better that she doesn’t witness what he knows is about to happen.

When Seokjin is done unwrapping the ice pop, the other members’ incessant pockets of whispers cease and they wait with bated breath for what Yoongi had been fearing for his life for - except Namjoon, the bastard doesn’t check his messages.

He first wraps his full lips around the tip of the Zesty Lime ice pop he had opted for, shuddering in unsullied delight as the refreshing iciness melts onto his tongue in a burst of flavour. With his lips still on the ice pop, his tongue pokes out from on top his bottom lip, first to collect any juice that has dissolved onto his bottom lip, then to curl around the popsicle and lick a stripe towards his lips before disappearing into his mouth again.

Fuck, Yoongi can already feel the wretched and all-knowing twitch in his jeans.

Without warning, Seokjin shoves the whole ice pop into his mouth, the whole fucking thing, his plump lips stretching around the end of the popsicle, red from effort and the frigid ice pop. Yoongi can’t possibly ignore the small choke erupting from the back of Seokjin’s throat or the tears bunched around the edges of his eyes, all the while allowing the ice pop to stay in its place. The last straw is when he hollows his cheeks.

Yoongi dares to chance a glance towards the other members. Namjoon has a trembling hand over his mouth, Hoseok’s jaw has gone completely slack, Jeongguk is muttering a long string of curse words under his breath, Jimin’s tongue is swirling on his bottom lip, and save the best for last, Taehyung’s face is a brilliant shade of red. Yoongi would laugh at them if it weren’t for the gradually taut feeling in his jeans, fuck, and he knows it isn’t even the worst part yet.

And as if Seokjin had read Yoongi’s mind, he moans around the popsicle in unadulterated pleasure, eyes lolling up for a split second before flitting back to maintain a loving gaze at the popsicle, painfully oblivious to the mortified stares the others were giving him (cashier included, whoops). When he decides that he’s done - thank God - he pulls the ice pop out of his mouth, the bright green of the popsicle reappearing at a sickeningly slow pace, and finally, finally coming out of his mouth with a slick ‘pop’ sound. (Yoongi vaguely remembers wondering if that’s why they called it an ice pop.) Everybody tries their best to ignore the glossy string of saliva connecting Seokjin’s mouth and the ice pop.

“What– what the fuck was that?” Jeongguk is the first one to speak up, his voice coming out as a squeak more than anything.

“That was way worse than any porn I’ve ever watched,” Namjoon has the cheek to say, and Hoseok hits his shoulder.

Yoongi smiles bitterly. “It’s already my second time witnessing this, and I still can’t get used to it.”

At this, Jimin chuckles and licks his lips. “Au contraire, Yoongi hyung, I think I could get used to this.”

“You’re disgusting.”

“I cannot believe you’ve been hiding the good stuff from us, hyung,” Hoseok mumbles, still recovering from the daze.

“Firstly, I’ve only seen it once before this. Secondly, who are the fucking idiots who ignored me when I was trying to tell them about this?” Yoongi sneers, face marked into a frown.

“You didn’t tell us he was going to deep-throat a-”

“Yah! What’s going on behind here? A secret cult meeting that I wasn’t invited to? I’m hurt,” Seokjin’s voice joins the conversation unexpectedly, his signature squeaky laugh bouncing off the shelves, and everybody startles. “Aren’t any of you going to get anything?”

Nobody knows how to respond for fear that he had been listening in on their conversation the whole time. To everybody’s relief, Taehyung breaks the silence.

“Ah,” Taehyung gestures towards a stream of juice flowing down Seokjin’s finger, onto his palm and down his arm. “Hyung, do you need a tissue for that?”

Seokjin responds in the form of a slight shake of his head before bending his head towards the trickle of juice down his right arm, and licking it, his tongue curling and flicking at every single last drop of juice. For some godforsaken reason however, nobody seems to be able to take their eyes of him, the way his tongue works up his arm (his arm, for God’s sake) in a way no person should ever be allowed to. Ever.

He pauses halfway, somewhere at his wrist, hooded eyes suddenly darting up at the rest of them, holding them in an accusatory stare, and Yoongi thinks it’s specifically directed at him. He gulps. Seokjin’s gaze doesn’t tear away from them until he’s done, and when he is, he simply beams at them and walks away, stuffing the ice pop down his throat once again.

“Do you think he knows?” Jeongguk croaks out, and everybody looks over at Yoongi apprehensively. And Yoongi doesn’t know how to respond to that.

Soon enough, everybody decides on an ice pop, Taehyung and Jeongguk opting for none - dietary reasons, they called it - and they make their way out of the convenience store, steely eyes too trained on Seokjin to notice a certain somebody sidling up next to Seokjin.

“Jin hyung, do you want to try my ice pop? Mine’s pink,” Jimin has an arm around Seokjin’s wide shoulders, his other arm outstretched towards the taller male in an attempt to feed him the Cherry Bomb. Seokjin gladly accepts any offers of free food he sees and allows his tongue to coil around the tip of the dark pink ice pop, humming in approval of Jimin’s choice. Jimin’s internal victory dance is short-lived as he is torn away from Seokjin’s side by a wild Taehyung.

“Hyung, I know you don’t like using tissues, but you’re making a mess,” comments Taehyung as he swipes his thumb on the corner of Seokjin’s lips, and bringing it to his mouth. Seokjin subconsciously flicks his tongue at the spot Taehyung’s thumb had been resting just moments ago, leaving Taehyung very flustered, who resorts to burying himself in Jin’s broad back to hide his pink cheeks. Yoongi would like to say that this was the end of the maknae line’s tactics, but it isn’t.

“Can I have a lick at your ice pop, hyung?” Jeongguk appears out of nowhere, and flashes a blinding smile at Seokjin. Yoongi lets out an audible gasp, the nerve of that brat, he knows how weak Seokjin is to the maknae, he’ll have to depend on the fact that Seokjin can be stingy with his food.

Seokjin chuckles at Jeongguk and ruffles his hair. “Only for my Jeongguk,” Seokjin coos and extends the arm holding the popsicle to Jeongguk, who responds more than happily by sticking it in his mouth and side-eyeing anybody who was throwing jealous glares at him. He smiles around the ice pop, but eventually moves away from it, a satisfied grin playing at his lips.

The elder hyungs can’t help but click their tongues at their dongsaengs, immature brats, Namjoon says. Except that he says it with the tone of voice that gives away the fact that he wants to be young enough and cute enough to get away with anything those “immature brats” just did, Yoongi duly notes.

Yoongi knows better than to brood over this, so he does the only thing he knows how to do in this sort of situation. He, in this opportune moment, decides that he is going play the roommate card, the card deemed the most despicable in the Bangtan dormitory, according to everybody but Yoongi.

But Seokjin beats him to it.

“Yoongi-chii, can I have a bite of yours?” Seokjin had somehow managed to shake off the three brats and sling his arm around Yoongi, a smile on his lips as he leans in to taste his ice pop, with absolutely no regard for Yoongi’s decision. Consent is important, kids.

“Yah, this hyung,” Yoongi bites back at him - albeit a little too affectionately - in the pretence of not enjoying all the attention the oldest hyung was spoon-feeding him. He loves it, he’s just had enough dignity to keep it in his pants so far, which reminds him of the boner residing in his jeans, which he has artfully hidden with a jacket tied around his waist.

Hearing Seokjin burst into his trademark laugh, Yoongi can’t help but smile.

chimmers changed his nickname to jinmin. jinmin changed the group name to jin’s tongue appreciation cult.

jinmin ah thats better

suga&spice changed the group name to he will call the cops on us. jinmin changed the group name to jinnie oppa fan club!!!!.

suga&spice fuck no only the nickname stays

suga&spice changed the group name to emergency meeting.

jinmin i like my nickname very much tqvm

jinmin updated the group picture.

suga&spice is that when did u take that wtf park jimin u creep

seaguk ah

seaguk changed his nickname to jinkook.

jinkook i dont mind it though???

taelien changed his username to taejin.

taejin neither does yoongi hyung but he isnt about to admit it

jinmin ;) no need to say thank you boys but i will fight you on the nickname thing

suga&spice that is a fucking picture of jin hyung eating the popsicle if he chances upon any of our phones were dead

jinkook i like living on the edge

suga&spice u are all horrible people i never should have let u sorry bastards know about this istfg

taejin esp park jimin u sneaky rat

jinmin jeongguk though????

jinkook ha

rapmoney since when did we have this group

suga&spice u were sleeping

jinkook arent you lucky we woke you up

taejin lol joonie hyung went back offline

jinkook lol

suga&spice uhh btw just asking but how do you change your nickname in a group

jinmin thought you’d never ask press the settings bar at the top right corner of the group chat the group chat ok if you do it elsewhere you’ll change your nickname in that chat there’s a button all the way at the bottom that says change nickname press it

suga&spice removed nickname function in emergency meeting.

taelien YOONGI HYUNG i h8 u

suga&spice wait i swear that was an accident uh wtv it was confusing anyways

sunshinehobi am i late to the party anyways i don’t know about you guys but that ice pop made my boner pop #shameonme

chimmers #shameonme

seaguk #shameonme

rapmoney #shameonme

taelien #shameonme

suga&spice oh look joonie’s back on and btw all of u are nasty ass bitches

seaguk really now

chimmers i think you should be the most ashamed

suga&spice #shameonme

sunshinehobi #shameonyou

chimmers #shameonyou

suga&spice STOP

taelien #shameonyou

It’s an hour to showtime and the members of Bangtan Sonyeondan are holed up in their dressing room, some of them drumming their fingers on the pristine white couches while staring at the wall on the opposite side of the room, some of them aggressively tapping on their phones, letting slip a curse word or two once in a while.

Seokjin, meanwhile, is thinking of what to do for his next Eat Jin, and he’s hungry to hear the members’ opinions on the idea he’s settled on.

“For my next episode of Eat Jin, I was thinking I could have something sweet to eat,” Seokjin muses out loud, tapping a finger on his chin. “A popsicle, maybe?”

At the mention of popsicle, all the members swivel their head around at him with wide eyes and parted lips and flushed cheeks. “No,” they respond, creepily in sync.

Seokjin’s head tips to one side, doe eyes wide with innocence, eyebrows arched up in confusion. “Why?”

“No reason,” Jeongguk replies hastily. Hoseok offers an unapologetic shrug.

Seokjin looks offended and while crossing his arms over his chest, huffs, “Then each of you is going to buy me a popsicle to make up for that.” His frown quickly melts into a toothy smile.

Taehyung is sent into a coughing fit, along with Namjoon. Jimin merely mirrors Seokjin’s expression.

And Yoongi doesn’t quite miss the way the edges of Seokjin’s lips quirk up into a knowing smirk.