#And the fact that my parents will be so upset if I am indeed a lesbian

[barclaysangel]

Computer, how do I find out my sexuality?

Quickest route, without having to admit that I may be a lesbian with comp het.

…

PUTER, DO YOU HEAR ME?!

[generalluxun]

Honestly its kind of funny in a tragic way that elements of bad/cruel behavior seen in Chloe can also be seen echoed in her parents but also in the fact this kind of makes her even more weirdly tragic because of how normalized it is to her.

Firstly there's just the general rudeness & disregard, her mother doesn't remember her name and belittles her constantly unless she somehow interprets a slight against Chloe as against herself. Chloe still adores her.

Like when she rips up Rose's letter to Prince Ali this is undoubtably a cruel thing to do, but its also very much how her own mother responds to her own gifts and Chloe still loved her & pursued her approval.

Then there's how her father and everyone around her is just OK with this or at worst does the most minimal intervention. "Darling you can't fire our daughter" like my gods, grow a spine Andre.

What this adds onto things for me is how this plays into how Chloe perceives her position amongst her peers.

Because she seems to oscillate wildly between "Everyone loves me" & being confused & upset when they don't. Or "being "Everyone hates me and I don't know why and or how to fix it".

Because to her this is just like... Normal behavior, it does hurt her, but she still loves the one's who do it so why wouldn't she also still be loved? At least it feels that way anyway, I'm honestly not sure, especially cos of how her self awareness and self image shifts a lot.

Honestly the only out of sorts thing we've seen her do that I don't think her parents have done to her was trapping Juleka in the stall. Which was indeed a really horrible thing to do & possibly the worst she does on her own? I kind of fell off around S3 so only vaguely know the rest of the outline & don't want to offer an opinion on it due to not watching. Plus even then the stall is still learned behavior as far as "Use force to get what you want" goes so its still taught behavior.

Yeah, Chloé has learned her behavior from her parents, clearly. Most of the learned behavior is from her father (She directly references him as her role model twice when doing bad things.) her mither is more about openly aping while not being too familiar with it.

The Juleka thing I am always torn on, because people overstate it so often. It was clearly a bad thing to do but Chloé wasn't *bullying* Juleka with a purpose. She wanted to be beside Adrien. The only reason Juleka got the lock was she was the one to go to the bathroom. Anyone else? They would have gotten the same. I fully believe Chloé would have locked the photographer in the bathroom, shoved a camera in the art teacher's hands, stuck herself by Adrien and had the picture taken if she could.

Chloé had no way of knowing(and probably wouldn't care but still didn't know) how badly being left out of a class picture would affect Juleka. It wasn't malicious in that way. Like, do people think Max was bullying Juleka when he raised his hand directly in front of her face in the old picture? 🤣

[maegalkarven]

The innocence of youth.

A oneshot featuring Noah, Gurgetash child, because I am ridiculously attached to this wonderful little boy.

Noah meets the team, hugs Halsin and proposes to make flower crowns.

“You have a child,” Gale, the brave soul he is, is the first to break off the awkward silence.

Levi pushes the stupid fucking grin down.

“Yep.”

“And it’s...Gortash’s child,” the wizard insists.

“Mhm.”

“A child of a tyrant Enver Gortash.”

“Yep.”

“His child.”

“Gale, I don’t think something will change if you keep repeating it like that,” Shadowheart comments, her eyes trained on the said child currently trying to sneak on Withers with a stick. Considering the very likely fact what Withers is actually one of the old gods, Noah’s bravery and idiocy is unparalleled. Withers pretends he doesn’t see very obviously sneaking on him five years old boy.

Jaheira watches over the boy from the safe distance, a deep frown laid between her eyebrows.

Levi knows what she’s thinking about; a bhaalspawn, another child with unholy blood in his veins. But this is the river they’ll cross when they'll cross it. Like hells Father dearest takes this child into his suffocating hold.

“I can’t believe you forgot you have a child,” the cleric continues. Levi snorts.

“Well, you forgot you had parents, so-“

“It’s not the same,” she argues and the fact what they can discuss such topic as simple as that shows how much they’ve overcome. How much they’ve changed and grown. “I was stripped of my memories by a goddess.”

“My sister put a dagger into my skull and rummaged inside until I had no memories left,” he parries. “And anyway, I don’t think I was a father to Noah before all that-” he gestures around. “You know. He hasn’t even met me prior, well, two days ago.”

“I can’t believe Gortash just let him go here like that,” Wyll comments. “He seems to be a little bit...paranoid.”

“He is a lot paranoid,” Levi responds. “And I reckon he has a good reasons for that, he is a tyrant of Baldur’s Gate, after all. Wait, where’s Halsin?”

Gale looks around and chuckles.

“Your son has him,” he comments fondly. “I’m pretty sure it’s Noah’s druid now.”

And indeed Halsin is very content in being carried around in a wild shape of a cat. Noah’s stick is forgotten, as well as his quest to poke Withers with it. Everyone seems to be relieved by that.

“It doesn’t look like he minds,” Levi comments absentmindedly, watching as Karlach raises her axe. “Enver’s paranoia is about to raise to dangerous heights in three, two, one-“

The first of the scrying eyes falls to the ground, broken. Noah turns around.

“I don’t mind if you do that to the remaining two,” he offers and Karlach grins.

“You got it, kid.”

The other spying devices suffer the same fate.

“Good thinking,” Wyll murmurs. “Let’s upset the tyrant sitting on the throne of Baldur’s Gate. Nothing bad will come out of it.”

“Oh, come on,” Levi smirks. “This is my child too, he is safe with me. And if Enver doesn’t think so, well, that looks like Enver’s problem.”

They watch as Noah puts cat Halsin around his shoulders like a cloak and tugs at Karlach’s pants.

“Do you want to make a flower crown?” he asks shyly. “I have never made flower crowns.”

Karlach looks around.

“Me?”

“Yep.”

“I...I’m not sure I’m the best one for that task, kid.”

“It’s alright, we can learn together!”

The earnestness and innocence seem to win against the boy’s relation to Gortash, and Karlach reluctantly smiles.

“Alright then. But we’ll need Halsin to show us the plants we shouldn’t touch. I think your dad will bite my head off if I accidentally give you poison burn.”

Noah looks hopeful.

“He will?”

“I’m sure of it.”

“But he just met me!”

“And I know he already cares about you a lot,” a glance back to Levi, who nods. “Come on, kid, let’s make everyone flower crowns.”

“You realize whose will be the ugliest flower crowns in the world,” Astarion chimes in.

“Well, then you’re not getting any.”

“Hey, I never said I don’t want an ugly fucking flower crown-“

“It will have bugs in it. You hate bugs.”

“I’ll just make Noah pick them up and throw them somewhere into the grass.”

“You will make five years old collect bugs?!”

“Oh, come on, he lived his entire life in a tower, he would be delighted to gather some bugs.”

“How long do you think I’ll take Gortash to show up here and murder us in our sleep for destroying his precious scrying eyes?” Gale contemplates.

“I give it an hour or two, and then we’re for a feat.”

Levi walks away, leaving his friends bickering, his posture at ease, muscles relaxed. It doesn’t take long for magic to overcome his body, bending bones and changing shape.

A small black cat throttles into the forest after the woman on fire and a little boy excitedly telling her about some extremely interesting story he just read. Well, not like read-read, more like looked at the pictures and read a little, but he will learn! Father says he is a fast learner.

“Mrpm,” the cat speaks as it hits the boy’s knees gently. Noah gasps.

“A cat!” and really, where did Enver raise him, in a box? How a mere sign of a cat can be so exciting?

Karlach looks behind.

“Oh, it’s your dad,” she comments. “He does that sometimes.”

“My dad is a cat?!”

“Sort of? He’s a druid like Halsin and Jaheira.”

Noah lets Halsin off his shoulders and kneels to reach for the black fur. The cat purrs and leans into the touch.

“Wow,” the boy whispers. “This is so cool. Do you think he can teach me how to do that? I want to be a cat too.”

“You can be a great many things, little one,” Halsin responds, already in his elf form. “Cat is one of the many wild shapes a druid can take. I am sure your parent will be happy to teach you.”

Levi mews, agreeing, and allows himself to be grasped into two small clammy hands.

“Is it alright if I carry you?” the boy asks. “Halsin doesn’t mind, but he said I need to ask first.”

Levi simply licks the boy’s fingers.

“I think it’s a yes,” Halsin smiles. “Now, about these flower crowns of yours...”

[benevolentcalamity]

Dragon (Maythyr) x Female!Reader [3/3]

Now, I do believe Maythyr may be the husbando I wanted him to be, which makes me very happy. So as a special treat, you guys get the special third part! Now you can fuck him. :D

My special, loving regards to my dear friend Chelsea, without whom this would’ve never been remembered.

Enjoy!

Warning: This fic contains smut, pregnancy, and references to parental alcoholism.

CURTAINS!

You remember it well, even moreso than the day you discovered him for the first time.

Maythyr had earned your father's respect and your mother's gentlehearted approval. Not just because of him clearly being a seasoned warrior, but his accolades through his time - some of them more ambiguous due to him being a dragon in disguise - as well as the good words of praise in the letters he brought. Those were surely just to stroke his own ego, but he had the knowledge of human societal customs to know he could walk the walk and provide proof of his footprints.

Now to be honest, your father is indeed the 'what you do to my daughter, I do to you' kind, which may also be why you would have men lined out the door for you if not for him. Then again that's likely so that anybody that can get past him is worthy of even breathing your air... Which is a fair improvement when he's been drinking.

After a hearty dinner with them, during which Maythyr spoke - rather happily in fact - of his recent campaign in the north. Luckily for him his armor implied what his words did not: he was from the northern kingdoms, defending them. He would go on to whisper to you that he was actually just usurping them, but he didn't have it in him to displease your parents in such a way or give them cause for concern.

Once all was said and done, he knelt before your parents - something he himself said he'd only ever do for you - and asked for your hand in marriage. After a bombarding of questions that would make the most patient of sages enraged, he received their blessing.

At first, you have admitted it confused you. By all rights, Maythyr didn't have to - he could've just swooped you up and gotten you the easy way. But in his words, the easy way was doing it 'properly' to minimize the amount of people that would be upset with him down to the boys that would chase your hips if you weren't careful. And besides, to just do that would undo all the hard work he put in to ‘appear’... well, human.

So to the village itself, he is a living legend. To you, he’s the Dragon God of War.

Now that the recap is just about over, the little extra pages that don’t mean anything will be flipped to this current moment.

The ceremony was planned admittedly quickly, as Maythyr agreed to marry you in the village. Not to say he had plans of taking you elsewhere far away - he did, you know, he just doesn’t mention it - but it wouldn’t be fair for him to have received their blessing and not witnessed the two of you together. It’s the sort of thing that kills a dragon inside, but according to him it stopped being the sort of thing that bothers him centuries ago. Actually he said decades, but you humor him.

So you’re standing here, in a white gown, as your mother gives the final touches on your hair.

“And not to worry, sweetheart,” She softly assures, tucking some stray strands back into your ‘do. “I’ll make sure [dad’s name] doesn’t drink too much.”

“I am concerned, mom, that he’s been drinking too much lately,” You frown. “It’s one thing to have some ale to take the anxious edge off, but to drink almost a full pint every couple days...”

“Believe me, it worries me as well.” She sweetly kisses your cheek. “But not to worry, Malcolm-” the village elder- “and the others will be watching him carefully.”

It is true. Your dad’s a very cheery drunk, it’s true, but he’s long forgotten what it’s like to be clearheaded and sober. When last you asked when he’d been sober, he simply pulled you into a hug and said you had beautiful eyes. Either he had no idea what you asked him, or he did know and just decided not to burden you with the truth. Whatever it is, it’ll eventually tear this family apart.

But for now, you’ll be assured everyone will make sure he’s not as drunk. Though you are brought back from those concerns when she softly nudges your arm.

“You just concentrate on Maythyr. Today is the day for both of you - nothing else matters, alright?” She finishes straightening everything out. “I’m so proud right now... My baby’s found someone!” Now it’s your turn to prevent the waterworks. “No, no... Sorry, I lost myself for a moment. Are you ready?”

You smile.

“Let’s do this.”

___

Now, considering this is a mountain village, it would be forgiven - expected, even - to not have a simple chapel. However, you lot are lucky, considering a few clergymen became a congregation, and finally with the help of donations one was erected. A huge one was unwanted, unnecessary, and so it’s a quaint building with the stained glass and angelic statues to signify the love you all poured into it. The presence of God is strong there.

Once you’re at the doors, that’s when dad hurries over. You sigh in admitted relief upon seeing his skin crystal clear and not a stagger in his step.

“Thanks, dad,” You say softly as he loops your hand into his arm, to which he gives a squeeze.

“I’m not missing a day like this,” He replies, kissing the side of your head - and undoing some of your mom’s handiwork. “Oops.”

“He won’t notice some stray hairs,” You chuckle. “... Alright, let’s do this.”

As if on cue, the doors open with a resounding, somewhat elegant ‘creak’. Rows of people dressed to the nines stand up, making a perfect aisle. Swallowing, you walk in perfect tandem with your father, nodding at some of the happy faces so that your frayed nerves will begin to calm down.

Once you look up again, there’s a breathtaking sight.

Maythyr’s abandoned his armor. Instead some deep black and white flowing robes teasing his chest a bit - you would swoon if he wasn’t wearing pants - blow in the faint breezes. His hair pouring down his back as the mountain streams, he looks right out of a fantasy novel from once upon a time. Sharply lined sapphire eyes crinkle in unfiltered happiness at the sight of you.

Wordlessly dad kisses your cheek, passing your hand to Maythyr’s awaiting one, and you stand opposite your dragon. With his touch, cradling your hands with utter delicacy, your troubles and anxieties melt to the wind, and for a moment you don’t even register anymore the music being played at the far side.

“I bid you all welcome,” The pastor greets. “We are gathered here today to witness and celebrate one of life’s greatest moments, which shall unite [Name] [Last Name] and Knight Maythyr-” Oh, that’s right, Maythyr neglected a last name- “in matrimony.”

Blinking, you note some figures outside each window, and lean in, which Maythyr reciprocates as the pastor continues. “Maythyr, do you know them?” You whisper.

He nods, keeping his voice down. “They are my fellows.” A wink; they’re dragons too. “I gathered them during my campaign, and about commanded them to bear witness and protect us.”

“Us, you mean... well, myself,” You chortle, and it only gets worse when he chuckles in affirmation. “You do think of everything.”

“To be expected from a god of war such as I, my dear.” He sneaks a tap to your nose. “I’m more marvelous than you think.”

“Try me,” You smile, earning a suggestive smirk before you straighten your backs in unison, continuing to listen to the sermon.

“-And who choose to spend the rest of their lives together.” The pastor looks between you two with a playful scolding look. “This ceremony does not birth a new relationship between the pair of you, nor are old ties forgotten and cast into nothingness. Rather, it is the binding of your two hearts, two souls, that your love may become whole, overcoming every trial and obstacle life shall bring, and join you as one in the eyes of the gods.”

“Alvis!” A hushed voice from the dark corners by the door perks up your ears. “You idiot! That’s your cue!”

Chortling, you watch as a scarlet haired man, clearly a bit boggled, elegantly steps through the aisle, a pillow in his hands. For a moment he gives Maythyr an annoyed glance completely ignored, long ears twitching as he hands the pillow to the pastor, whom unfolds the fabric atop it. Once his work is done he retreats behind Maythyr, folding his hands before his stomach.

... Ah?

Maythyr taps your one hand in reply - a message that he will explain later - before having to break from you to receive one of the rings. It’s a fine iron, as opposed to the traditional gold. To you it means more, for reasons you’ll find words for soon, and to Maythyr it’s a symbolism of your silent, pure, and true acceptance of his being a dragon. It melts his prideful countenance, if for a moment, and clearly he’s having to restrain himself from kissing you right there.

Not yet.

“Maythyr, if you would put this ring on [Name]’s finger and repeat after me.” Maythyr follows the pastor’s instructions, slipping your ring on and clasping that hand in both of his. “I, Maythyr, do eternally swear.”

“I, Maythyr, do eternally swear.”

“That I shall take thee as my wife.”

“That I shall take thee as my wife.”

“To have and to hold.”

“To have and to hold.”

“Through sickness and in health.”

“Through sickness and in health.” His adam’s apple bounces with a restrained chortle of irony, which you respond to with narrowing your eyes playfully.

“I will give to you my hand and my heart.”

“I will give to you my hand and my heart.”

“T’il death do us part.”

“T’il death do us part.”

You hear mom choking up beside you in the front, but then you’re taken from the sound by the pastor handing you the other ring.

“[Name], if you would put this ring on Maythyr’s finger and repeat after me.”

You nod, slipping the ring onto his finger, clasping his hand in both of yours this time. Man, you feel so small.

“I, [Name], do eternally swear.”

“I, [Name], do eternally swear.”

“That I shall take thee as my husband.”

“That I shall take thee as my husband.”

“To have and to hold.”

“To have and to hold.”

“Through sickness and in health.”

“Through sickness and in health.”

“I will give to you my hand and my heart.”

“I will give to you my hand and my heart.”

“T’il death do us part.”

“T’il death do us part.”

Turning pink, you allow Maythyr to return your hands into comfortably resting inside his, and the sun slowly lights up the room more and more.

“If anyone has just cause for these two not to be joined in union...” The pastor’s voice turns a bit low. “Speak now, or forever hold your peace.”

Nervously, you turn your eyes to the congregation. Your blood runs cold, if for a moment, when dad’s hands twitch ever so slightly. As if noticing your worries, he meets your eyes, giving you a reassuring smile. Simpering, you return your attention to Maythyr, and he gives your hands a soft squeeze.

“Well, then.” The pastor’s voice is jovial once more. “By the power vested in me, I declare [Name] and Maythyr husband and wife.” He then smiles. “Kiss your bride, Maythyr.”

Without the slightest hesitation, Maythyr reaches up to cup your face, pulling you into a deep kiss. There’s cheering, there’s clapping, even some whistling going on, but you don’t care. Deep inside, there’s a stirring feeling, perhaps even a liberating one; like your soul is being warmed by a gentle fire. There’s also a sensation like something kind of poking you, but you choose to ignore that one.

At last... at long last, you’ll be together now.

__

Now this is you we’re talking about - there is no way you, a beloved part of this village, aren’t getting an absolute party  for your wedding. Matter of fact, Maythyr too was all about it, and so before you knew it there were lanterns, song, and dance lighting up the fading dusk. Not to mention the delicious food lining every corner of the venue - even the not-that-hidden dragons Maythyr invited are digging it.

One leg a bit sore from your one dance with your dad, you watch from the punch line - Grizelda’s secret - as he downs his first drink, in the general view of the village elders as promised. Well, at least he’ll be supervised...

A pair of arms loops around your waist, and you smile, reassured, leaning back into Maythyr’s chest.

“I’ll say one thing,” He murmurs, sending chills down your back. “You humans very much know how to throw a party.”

You chortle. “What, dragons don’t dance?” You tease, nudging his arm.

“Our only ‘dance’ is in combat, love.” He gives your ear a nip. “... Elsewhere, too.” The connotations aren’t unnoticed.

Biting your lip, you tilt your head back to meet his eyes properly, him softly toying with the stray strands of hair. “Maythyr.”

“Mmm?” He nuzzles the side of your head.

“My parents must be allowed to see us,” You mention. “I know you don’t like visitors, but... I don’t want to lose my family.”

“... Very well.” He’s a bit begrudging - the generic nature of a dragon being possessive - but his voice doesn’t express it that well. You can detect it all the same. “You are my treasure, but more importantly you are my mate; consider your wishes mine as well.”

You flutter inside, smiling a bit. “And our children, too... How many kids do you want, Maythyr?”

“Yes.”

“Oh, by the gods-!” You playfully smack his forearm, to which he pulls your cheek, the two of you erupting in fits of laughter as his other hand goes and tickles your belly for a moment.

“Come, now.” He starts leading you back towards the party. “If you’re not at all spent, I think it’s time they learned how to dip.”

“Maythyyyyyr!”

The both of you look, and your dad is stumbling over, tanker in hand, giving your new husband some kind of eye. A stinkeye? Can he even give those when he’s almost drunk as all fuck?

At the flick of a wrist, Maythyr readopts the cordial nature he greeted him with when he came back to get you when he promised to. With a smile, the natural growl in his voice is turned way low, and he again appears human even to you for a moment.

“Hello, father,” He greets. “Ah, it is okay to call you father, right?”

“Yes...” Dad drawls. “But you better understand one thing.”

Maythyr crosses his arms, tilting his head feigning an innocent stare.

“What you do to my daughter...” As he swigs his tanker, you notice people keeping their eyes on him. “I do to you.”

Worriedly, you look towards Maythyr, and-

Oh.

Flip-flopping from his innocent expression, his lips stretch into a smile too big for his face, narrowing his eyes and raising his eyebrows before wiggling them. A provocative, suggestive expression, indeed. One that double dog dares your dad to live up to it. An amused snort-hum leaves him, almost leaking fire, but dad’s already so drunk he wouldn’t be able to tell.

Realizing how Maythyr had silently twisted his words, a cold sweat perspires from dad’s face, and he starts stammering in an attempt to backtrack so his new son will stop looking at him like that. He’s drowned out, promptly, by the howling laughter of whoever could understand what was going on. Leaving the kids attending in the dark, the lot of you seemingly reignite the party, and the dancing continues as old Malcom leads dad away to sober up or throw up - one of the two.

“And just so you know,” You remember Maythyr whispering once it’s time for the lanterns to go out, having slipped you into the shadows to steal a kiss. “There’s only one thing dragons are better at than fighting. Do you dare to hazard a guess?”

You grinned.

“You’re on.

___

“A-aah!”

The palace in Arktikania, where the snow masks rotting kills and the howling wind carries song but mutes screams and moans. Dragons under Maythyr’s command as their god of war fly to and fro, fresh from reconnaissance or campaigning. But none dare disturb the palace’s uppermost rooms apart from the throne at the apex.

Why? Well...

“Hnnhhh...” Maythyr purrs, massaging the soft skin of your breasts. “Such a good girl...” Pulling one into his mouth, he sucks hungrily, watching your reactions as you struggle to keep balanced.

The proper answer to Maythyr’s question is on full display. After some non-permanent goodbyes, he took you up here to give you a proper wedding consummation. At least, that was kind of his words - his actual words were a whoooole lot hungrier. Not that they bear repeating, mostly because it’s the sort of thing he rather stay with you.

Both hands tangling into his hair, you arch your back a bit, feeling his other hand slipping down between your legs. Your naked body is protected from the climate by the insulating fabrics that curtain the bed. It’s by no means a small one, considering he also likes sleeping as his dragon self still, so there’s plenty of room for these little games. And being a creature known for being able to rage on for years if they must, well... you’ll be feeling this one when it ends. If you even want it to.

“Maythyr... Ah...” You moan, your head lolling back a bit as you feel his fingers slip into your folds. Wasting no time ‘hooking’ you in with one, his hips grind up into your legs, his lips curling into a smile whilst sucking.

All too soon he breaks from you, lifting you up and plopping you onto your back with ease. Just as you think to complain he lifts your hips, looping his arms around your thighs and pressing them against his ears. An uneven gasp rips from you as his forked tongue laps up your wetness.

“Gh-ah! M-Maythyr-!” You squeak, hands flying back towards his hair.

Like an answer to your prayers, he fully presses his face into your arousal, tongue sliding inside you with ease. Arching into him, your grip on his hair tightens, only seeming to egg him on. As though wanting to see how far you can go his pace quickens, and outside you he nips and sucks where he is able. Every nook and vein is licked and sucked with ravenous greed, and only when he opens his eyes once more and meets your pleading stare do you realize he intends to do more than just absolutely nail you.

An almost devilish grin cements this, before he plasters himself to you once more, going full-force inside you. The tips of his tongue about wrap around your sweet spot, wriggling it until a pulsing inferno bubbles in your hips. Your vision is flooding with the very stars, and your breath is wrenched from you as your heat begins to clamp down and pulsate around him.

“A... Aahh... Ah...!” You let out, before finally your orgasm takes hold. “Aaaaahhh!”

His tongue pulls out, but like a drunkard he’s gulping down all the ambrosia seeping from your trembling pussy, savoring it like a fine wine. Once you’ve given all you’re able right now, he lowers your hips once more,  moving upwards so he can kiss you. Not caring that you can taste yourself on him, you allow your tongue to be wrapped up and played with, his hands holding your head and hips grinding into yours.

Eventually, he pulls away, moving down and nipping at your neck. “I just can’t get enough of you, treasure...” He purrs, both hands caressing your breasts. “Mmm... You’re so warm, my dear... And wet.” He chuckles. “You’re so eager to be this dragon’s prize, aren’t you?”

Sitting up, he spreads your legs widely, nipping at your ankles. Unrestrained, he stares hungrily at the visible clenching.

Finally, you can bear it no longer. “P-please...” You whimper.

He snickers, nibbling at your shins. “Please what, lovely?”

Unsure if you can even hang onto your dignity at this rate, you plead, “Please, Maythyr-! Fuck me!”

His smile doesn’t falter, instead dripping with a beast no longer to be restrained. “Good girl.” Leaning forward, he pushes your knees up to your chest, hovering  so his cock teases your heat. Biting his lip in concentration - by the gods if that isn’t the sexiest thing he does - he loops his arms through your shoulders, parting his thighs to better split your legs.

Wanting to savor this, he nips your lips as he pushes inside, rumbling deep in his chest as his cock effortlessly melds into you. Moving one hand to your belly he rubs the resulting bulge with a chuckle. Once the discomfort fades, you nod, and almost abandoning restraint he’s pumping in and out of you, as if intending to mold you into his cock’s shape.

“Ahhh... Ahh... Aaaah!” You moan, arching up into him as your hands claw at his back. “M-Maythyr-! Aaah!” Stars only begin glittering your vision when he pulls your legs up into his arms, pushing your hips up so he can get even deeper. With each thrust pounding every good spot you’re left mewling, crying out, thankful for every protection around you two. He won’t care about you screaming his name into the arctic winds - matter of fact he’d aim for it. But right now, he’d rather just have this.

“Nngh...” He grunts. “Heh, if I knew you were this good, I’d have figured out a human form the first time you came to me in the mountain.”

You can’t even answer him; any attempt at words just comes out as a squeal or a moan - which he is definitely doing on purpose. After all, he did promise you the night of your life... And it’s hardly past midnight-!

“A-ah?” Something feels different.

Opening your eyes, you watch as Maythyr... shifts, kind of. His black scales become more prominent on his neck and cheeks, eyes more serpentine like his full dragon form. Inside you his cock grows larger, even seeming to change its shape a bit, and you squeak, walls clamping down and pulsing around it. The base of his shapeshifted cock swells, like a bubble, squeezing against your pussy hungrily.

Swallowing, you dare look down, and-

“Oh, by the gods...” You swoon. “M-Maythyr, you’re knotted-!”

“I know...” He groans, pushing it against you impatiently. “... Can you take it all?”

Not even hesitating, you have your legs in a higher position, ready and willing without taking anything else into account. You don’t care how sore you get or how your body has to contort; you need all of his cock. Right now.

“Give  it to me...” You quiver as he begins thrusting again. “Please...”

He leans down, licking up your neck to your jaw. “Very well... My sweet, good girl, I’ll pump you so full you won’t be able to walk for until our babies are born.”

And without a shadow of hesitation he does just that. Every thrust of his cock, his knot squeezes ever so much more, wanting to be inside you. The way your nails scratch the hardened skin of his back eggs him on, perspiration shining his face as his cock nails you until you’re seeing stars. Only occasionally does he swallow your screams with his tongue, which you respond to by desperately clutching his head.

Fuuuck... You moan as your own tongue is subdued and wrapped up, feeling the bubbling heat in your hips once again...

“I-I’m going to...” You breathe, and- “A-AAAAH!”

Almost unceremoniously, the knot pops right inside you, and that’s when Maythyr is at last at the apex. Much like he would as his fully shifted self, he throws his head back, roaring a mighty roar, and before you know it he’s cumming once; twice; a whopping six times with a driving thrust. Even then there’s still more coming out of him, the knot emptying shamelessly into your womb.

Arching, your orgasm has the combined fluids flooding down your skin and to the bed, hanging onto Maythyr as though you’ll die if you let go of him. When at last the tremors of orgasm cease, and the knot is emptied, the both of you collapse.

Falling down behind you, he wraps you up in his arms as his body is once again fully human. Nuzzling into your back, he’s too fatigued for a witty comment or even some risque implication of the morning’s activities. Instead, he’s silent for a moment, caressing your body delicately and embracing you, peppering your skin with kisses.

Nudging you so you open your eyes, he hovers over you a bit, both hands interlocked under your back. “Are you alright? Are you hurt?”

Barely mustering the strength, you nod, reaching up with trembling fingers and caressing the apple of his mocha cheek. Snorting with palpable adoration, he catches your hand in his, kissing the heel and nipping a bit at your wrist.

That’s when you see the same expression he gave on your wedding. A gentle, endearing smile meant only for you, the only proof of his softness.

“... I love you,” He murmurs, lowering down to kiss your lips. “Ah... By the gods, I love you...”

The blizzard outside is silent once more.

___

Beyond thankful that you still are able to, you’re whiling away the quiet hours with your lyre. You’ve gotten so big you can hardly move, what with the babies seeming to multiply in your belly. Nevermind a bowl or a plate, an entire banquet could fit on it, which is a joke you’ve made many a time every meal you share with your husband.

Speaking of him, he yawns, readjusting so his wing continues to shield you as his tail locks it in place. Chortling, you crane your neck to look at him properly, his one eye peeking open once he senses your gaze.

“How are you feeling, love?” He asks, to which you smile.

“I feel like I could pop any day now, honestly, but even I know it won’t be for a time... As much as it looks like it.” Your fingers don’t even miss a string; you suppose you’re still as adept as ever.

“And that is why I’ve sent Alvis to the west in my stead.” The redhead from the wedding; one of his most trusted war generals. “I do not care the severity of matters overseas - t’is my duty as a husband and a father to be here.”

Your smile only grows. “You’ll be a good one, I’m sure.”

“Yes, I will be. And with a treasure like you as my wife and their mother... Hah, they will be this world’s greatest beings.” And there is that classic Maythyr confidence, along with a puff of his soft chest.

“Speaking of, what names should we give them?” You tilt your head. “You haven’t forgotten about that, right?”

“Of course not. Hmmm... Why not a girl’s name, first? Make that a few. I think... Valka, Lymeria, Rosarion... Yorshka?”

“Those are lovely, Maythyr. And for a boy... Hmmm... Tyr, Egil, Ragarruss?”

“Wonderful.” He moves his head so he can nuzzle you, only slightly obstructing your music. “We’ll revisit the storybooks you love so much when next you feel like walking, we’ll have an entire list then. For now, is there anything you need, or you would like? Are you hungry?”

Simpering, you lean back into his belly, the warmth helping you to relax your back. “Hmmm... I have missed mama’s chocolate cake these days.”

His head snaps back with a laugh, and along a warm snort he nuzzles you once more. “Very well.”

[haee-elia]

1x01 - extreme aggressor pt.2 “great”

pairing: spencer reid x fem!reader; read part one here!

summary: a small blurb-like continuation of part one

warnings: literally none? maybe mentions of trauma? fluff? awkwardness? second-hand embarrassment?

word count: 1463

Walking down the halls of the Seattle FBI office, you see a familiar lanky figure down the hall, facing away from you.

“Spencer?” You call out before you even realized you opened your mouth. You feel a tinge of embarrassment as you realize you are indeed, not alone in the hallway. Some other agents and workers glance at you before carrying on with whatever they were doing.

The man, in question, that you called out turns around, hearing his name and his eyes slowly center onto your figure.

Before you know it, he’s walking down the hallway towards you and you give him a sheepish look as he arrives in front of you, “Dr. Reid, I am so sorry,” You grimace and lower your voice, hoping to not embarrass him in his place of work any more.

The awkward man that you had met in your sister’s apartment couldn’t have possibly been okay with you yelling his name across his workplace and around his colleagues.

“I just wanted to say thank you,” You say before he can get a word in, “Thank you to you and your team for finding my sister.” You give him a grateful smile.

Dr. Reid chuckles softly, “It’s no problem,” He says, “I’m glad me and my team could help find your sister and catch the guy responsible,”

“And I wanted to thank you for what you said to me,” You added on, “I was panicking and it wasn’t doing my sister, my brother, or myself any good.”

He waved it off, “It was no problem at all. In fact, I would be slightly worried if someone in your shoes weren’t upset or panicked.”

He chuckled at his last sentence and you returned with a small laugh.

“I, uh,” Spencer continues to talk, “know this might be a dumb question, but, um, how is your sister doing?” He asks.

You assume that in his line of work they often don’t get to see the people they help recover and their lives after.

You shrug and smile at him, “As good as she can be doing. The doctors want to keep her for another week and then she’ll go through a therapy and recovery plan. She’s still really freaked out about what happened and even David is setting her off.”

“That’s completely normal,” Spencer replies, “It probably is just the presence of a man, not necessarily your brother.”

You nod in agreement, “Yeah, I thought so too. David’s hurt by it though. The flinching, wincing, all that.” You say.

“We’re, um, actually thinking about moving Heather away from Seattle for a bit. Get a nice change in scenery and start fresh.” You add.

“Where were you thinking?”

“During the summer growing up, we would spend a few months with our grandparents in Maryland. They had this small place in Annapolis. When our grandparents died, they left it to our parents, and when they died, they left it to us. Heather, David, and I have some good memories growing up there and the house has been maintained over the years.” You explain.

Spencer smiles, “That, uh, sounds really nice. It might help your sister to be surrounded in a place she’s felt safe before.”

You both continue to dawdle around in the middle of the hallway, awkwardly. Neither of you make the move to leave or say goodbye, its almost like neither of you want this conversation to end.

“So,” You start to say, ending the momentary silence between the pair of you, “I should let you get back to work. You must be busy and have other people to help around here, huh.”

Against your will, your cheeks start blushing a small red tint and you get embarassed that you’ve held up this man’s day just so you could talk to him again.

“I don’t work here.” Spencer replies.

You’re sure he can see the confusement on your face after you realize what he just said.

He goes to explain himself, “What I mean! That is, um, I, uh, don’t work in this office. In this building. In Seattle. Me and my, uh, team traveled from Quantico. We’re all stationed in Quantico, Virginia.”

“Oh,” You laugh a little at his stumbling to answer, “Sorry, I just assumed that-”

He waved you off and chuckled to himself, “Don’t worry about it.”

“Oh, here,” You say, drawing the business card he gave you days earlier out of your purse, “I guess I didn’t need to use this afterall.”

“Keep it.” He blurts out not two seconds later. His hands stay by his side and there’s no movement to even accept back his card.

You try again, “I don’t really have a use for it now since Heather’s found and that guy is locked away. You should really give it out to another person who needs it.”

“Keep it,” He reiterates, “I insist.” He says, even going as far as taking his own hand and wrapping it around yours which was reaching out with the card in your fingers. He curls his larger hand around yours and tucks the card deeper into your palm without hurting you.

He steps back quickly afterwards and even as he angles his head towards the ground, you can see a faint blush on his cheeks. He’s embarrassed, you chuckle to yourself in your thoughts. You could tease him a bit more, but you decide not to.

“Are you in town for much longer?” You ask, vying to change the subject.

“Um,” He starts to answer while looking at his watch, “It’ll take roughly four to four and a half hours to get back to Virginia and it’s already pretty late, so we’ll probably leave first thing in the morning.”

You bite your lip and urge yourself in your thoughts to take your shot, “Do you and your team have plans tonight then?” You ask. You hope that he starts to get the hint so he can let you down gently if you’ve got it all wrong.

“I, uh, think we’re all doing our own thing tonight. Some are staying in the hotel. Others are exploring the city.” He informs.

“Do you, uh, -” You stutter, you wring your hands around behind your back, “Would you, um, like to grab dinner together?” You ask. You push back the urge to close your eyes and wince, wanting to see his reaction instead.

It’s a little more shocked than you had hoped for on his face, but you don’t see him pulling back or veering away from you. You take that as a good sign.

“Wh-what about your sister?” He asks, a little speechless.

“Visiting hours are over and David is handling a bunch of paperwork tonight.” You chuckle nervously, “I’m sorry if that made you really uncomfortable.” You apologize.

“Just nod and we can move on, pretend that I never asked you that, say goodbye and never see each other again.” You say, preparing for the worst.

“No!” He exclaims, nearly cutting you off. “I’d, uh, I’d really like that! To do that.”

He takes a deep breath and rephrases, “I would like to grab dinner with you.” He says, looking you in the eyes. You can’t help it when a smile creeps onto your face.

“I just, uh, need to very quickly finish some paperwork, so, um, would a late dinner be okay?” He asks, carefully.

You nod, “Yeah, that’d be great. We can just meet somewhere if that’s easier for you? I can text you the address of this really great Mexican place nearby?” You offer.

He shakes his head up and down enthusiastically and eagerly rummages through his satchel bag, still perched up on his hip.

He hands you something, “That would be great. Mexican is great. I’m- that’s- you’re-” He takes another deep breath and takes a moment, “Great. Just, um, great. I’ll be done by 9 and we can meet then. It, uh, was really great talking to you again.”

Spencer’s face flushes even more and after he hands you something, he moves away and says his goodbyes, making his way down the hall in the direction he came from before stopping in his tracks, turning around and walking in the opposite direction.

You can hear him as he passes where you still stand. “Great? Why did you say great so many times? You said great five times in two minutes, Spencer!” You hear him chastising himself.

You laugh quietly to yourself as you watch him leave, waving to him when he turns his head to see if you’re still watching him (and you are). You look down at your hand and let out a larger laugh now that his is no longer in sight.

He handed you another one of his business cards.

a/n: here’s a small continuation of extreme aggressor because i felt like i left it way more open-ended than the other one shots i have since posted. this is to tide you over until 1x05 broken mirror is finished and to be posted! i might do more of these small continuations for others...

[soupedepates]

We had just gotten married and Zuza couldn't (and didn't want to) stay in bed for more than necessary, so I had the pleasure of looking at her back as she was braiding her hair and looking for a headscarf, since she's a married woman now.

"Fryderyk, my love, get up and get dressed, I can hear outside the guests of our nuptials and..." She took the time to chose her clothes just to put on her loveliest dress and her cutest pinny. She moved the curtains aside to glance outside. "...And your parents are among them to fetch us for breakfast, I think."

"The Saints bless, your mother won't gouge my eyes out for having taken your virginity and exposed it to the village", I answered as I was starting to stretch.

"She knew it was all a trick", Zuza giggled. "Come on. I've had the time to prepare your outfit when you're barely out of bed."

"It's the first and the last night we will sleep here, we could've made the most out of it..." And just like that, I started to kiss the nape of her neck. Now it was licit and we didn't have to hide nor to worry anymore. Next step was founding a family. "We could've started working haaard to conceive our first..."

She kissed me on the lips. "After breakfast and you reassuring your parents on the fact everything went well, I might consider it." Call me a simple man but by the Saints, my wife - wife, could you imagine ? - is really something else, she was making my heart flutter just by whispering those words.

Breakfast was weird. I got seated between my parents. Just in front of Zuza who was observed by everyone. That's the custom for brides, and mine is shy enough to redden immediately from her forehead to her pointy ears. She didn't need to pretend to act all coy.

So my father went: "Son, did the night go well? It sure was rewarding, the courtship lasted forever, I'm sure it was a welcomed relief", all with a bawdy laugh.

And my mother: "I hope you stayed gentle, young women are fragile and you better treat yours with that in mind, or Danuta and I will have to teach you better. Zuza, was it painful? You can tell me."

"Zuza looks perfectly fine to me", exclaimed my father. "Ah, finally, I can call you my daughter!"

Zuza was, at the moment, burying her face between her hands. I was myself not very comfortable. Moreover we weren't innocent, neither of us, we knew each other's body rather well before the wedding night. But if anyone were to know - besides Danuta, for that was a bit late - it would be a huge scandal in the village and would tarnish the reputation of both my family and the Czacki. I didn't want poor Dariusz to turn in his grave for everyone was doubting his daughter's virtue.

Thanks the Saints for Zuza's shyness, honestly. She passed for someone who preserved herself until wedding so good job, babe, you're amazing and I love you so much.

"You're embarrassing her!" I tried. "Is it mandatory to ask that in a public setting?"

"That's what you get for being the future village chief, Fryd, be prepared for your every move to be scrutinized", my little brother snarkily remarked.

"Can we please let Zuza out of this? My poor wife is mortified", I tried again, not wanting to let Jacenty get to me.

"P-please, I am not willing to... discuss such things..."

Oh she was indeed embarrassed. She sounded embarrassed. She looked embarrassed. There was no doubt of it.

But I knew that slight trembling of the voice. And I knew that everyone was too used to her being so stern and severe looking to notice that.

The "poor wife" was, in fact, trying not to laugh. And I feel her little foot against my leg. Oh the little...

"Oh, I have forgotten how coy newly wed girls stay", my father pensively said while stroking his beard.

"Call me debauched, Nikodem, while you're at it!"

"Rozalia, my one and only, you're the most virtuous woman I got to meet", he made up for that while winking at me. "Note that, Fryderyk, a happy wife means a happy life, never upset her or you might regret it!" On these words he got up to hug my mother from behind, starting a commotion.

For of course, everyone started smugly slip smut just to embarrass Zuza a bit more, or they wanted to give me their piece of advice on a harmonious married life.

And I really never could have thought to say that, but thanks Danuta to appear late at the wedding breakfast. People stood up from their seat to congratulate the mother of the bride.

That was our cue to leave on the sly.

We ran away, Zuza with her shoes in her hands, until we could hide in a field that hadn't been harvested yet. She made sure no-one could see nor hear us, before erupting in laughter.

"Your father was... Oh my, I'm sorry, I really like you father, but he was..."

"I know, that was so hard to keep a straight face!"

I took her by the waist, before starting to kiss her on the lips. Again, and again, and again, tightening our embrace every time until her hands met in my back.

"You said something about considering starting to try for a child after breakfast..."

"Hmhm... And perhaps you're talking too much and not taking enough action now, don't you think?" she said with a large smile and holding onto my scarf.

I couldn't be a happier man. But this day sure was something.

[lyloneliness]

This will have nothing to do with bsd and will be very personal so those who follow me for bsd stuff you can stop reading if you want ₍⸍⸌̣ʷ̣̫⸍̣⸌₎

Actually, I don't think many remember, or have even read the tag game (edit: my bad, it was an ask) in which I said I actually have something similar to a Dissociative Identity Disorder.. Well, even if no one reads this I just wanna put my thoughts down so it's okay anyway.

I just realized that now that I'm dissociated, what is 'me' as an alter (alternative personality), or more as a person is supposed to be way more defined... Or restricted in a way. I was always a weird person, with many changes of heart, of moods, of likings and other stuff... Well, in everything really.

Back then, if I was to use only one word to define myself I would always answer "changing", or "inconsistent". One time I even got very upset at my parents and cried because they said it was a bad word, a bad thing, that I shouldn't describe myself as inconsistent... I felt like they rejected the fact that I am like this, or just basically, like they rejected me.

Anyway, now I know that it was because the different parts of 'me' that were supposed to assemble in one identity at the end of early childhood didn't assemble like with most people, those who don't struggle with severe dissociation. And with people with a 'complete' DID, they don't assemble at all, and one becomes the main while the others appear later in life to help the 'whole person'/system navigate in life, adaptating to situations by switching. But for me it was just like a child doesn't knowing how to combine many things to make a proper collage just taped a ripped sheet of paper together to vaguely maintain it, faking it being whole.

That's why I was like that, I was literally different persons stitched together and coexisting throughout my life.

And now that each of us is separated from the others, and well defined, they all know what they like, how they are, who they are. Well, they don't even have to acknowledge it, they just ARE like that.

All but me.

I'm the 'main', the one to whom all this life is attributed to, the base of our existence until now. And all the memories I have are supposed to be mine. My feelings, my likings, my relationships, my behaviors.. But now I know most of them were the other alters', and I don't know anymore what I like. What is 'me' in all of this?

I don't know how to make the distinction. I don't know what I like, how I'm supposed to act like. The person I was supposed to be wasn't really me all this time, so the image I had of myself is crushed.. I always felt like I wasn't properly someone, I never knew who I was, so I made efforts. But turns out all the progress I thought I had made over the years to construct my personality just split at the same time as us, I'm back to before I constructed everything I'm supposed to be. There is nothing left for me..

I can't even say what my favorite colour is.

I don't have an identity.

I feel like a digital painting to which all the layers were took away to make a complete painting out of each, and all is left is the blank canvas. That's indeed a weird comparison but well, I'm supposed to be an artist so I couldn't think of something else.

I feel like I'm a middle schooler in the middle of an existential crisis when I'm supposed to be 19 in a little more than a month. Everyone always said I was a mature one, turns out one of my alters was 4 years older all this time, and now I can't seem to see things from a distance, cool my head and try to understand anymore. Everything is blurry and I'm scared. Honestly, I forgot what it was to be lost and scared. 'I ' almost didn't feel anything in a year and now I'm blending with a big mess of feelings that I don't even know are mine or not, and how I need to react to them.

I don't even know if I'm tired of being in this void, or sad, or disappointed by this loss of self... I drown myself in hypersomnia to avoid existing like this and thinking about what I'm gonna become and how I'm supposed to become it (well, I don't even know what I want to be to begin with.. ), only to have weird dreams that I don't know are whose since I switch even in it, and deciphering it all seems exhausting.

I don't know what to do. I don't even know if I actually want to do anything..

Well, this is all for the rambling! (≡^∇^≡)

I kinda feel sorry for anyone who'd get until here reading all this mess... If you wanna say smth or ask questions I'm all open really. Even if it's quite unlikely.. but yeah, "just in case", yknow (=ㅇ༝ㅇ=)

Oh! And something that made me laugh (bitterly but still) :

*Incoming screenshot of when I was writing*, for those with the blue theme like me

Auto correct didn't even consider this possible 😹😹😹

[wromwood]

Something happened in therapy recently that has definitely happened to me before, and I wanna think about it for a bit.

So, I'm transitioning from one social worker to another because the new one will likely be a better fit for me. During our last session, I answered a few final questions in the previous social worker's assessment of me. In a past session, I'd mentioned that I was autistic, so she asked if I'd had any specialized learning plans or teachers/tutors during elementary/grade school, particularly after any evaluations I'd had. I answered no, but whether or not I needed that kind of help, an evaluation would've been amazing to have at that time.

The social worker looked a little surprised and asked when I had my autism evaluation. She got even more surprised when I answered that it happened a couple of years ago.

"But that's so recent," she said, double-checking my age to confirm that I had, indeed, been a legal adult two years ago.

"Uh, yeah," I said. I explained that I'd only gotten my evaluation at all because I was fed up with failing to convince my parents to do anything since I'd started asking about this in my teens, and finally realized "Wait a minute, I'm a legal adult now. I can schedule my own damn autism evaluation."

After confirming that I'd been evaluated in a legitimate medical setting (in fact, it was a research center in the clinic's own larger medical system), she asked what sort of autism I had. I had to explain where on the spectrum I was, how I didn't have "special needs" as most people understood them, how I could be independent, the whole thing.

I guess the reason this stuck out to me so much is that she didn't ask all these questions when I first mentioned that I was autistic, or when we discussed how an ideal social worker would be one who was experienced with autistic people. We talked about this, but she only asked further questions when she realized I wasn't someone who had been diagnosed in childhood. I suppose the assumption was that if I'd been diagnosed in childhood, then it would've shown in my schoolwork or social life in a very noticeable way, but as an adult, I would've worked through it and become the relatively-not-very-autistic seeming adult I am now. Or that I only would've sought out an evaluation as an adult for more "severe" signs of autism that would be more apparent when talking about my life.

I dunno, I'm not upset about it or anything, and otherwise, the social worker is great at her work. I just it's just a clear sign that there's still a stigma (perhaps lighter now than it used to be) about when and why someone would get evaluated for autism.

[nightmaremp]

Weremayhem: Song of Beasts. Ch 20: Phases of the Feline

  “Why?” asked Dr. Teeth as he lay his head on his keyboard. His voice is sad. The keyboard plays a sad tune each time the good doctor plays a note. He kept repeating “Why?” over and over. 

“Huh,” said Zoot, who was next to him. “Maybe the next line is Z.” he added. 

“After the phase of malaise, comes musical self-doubt” said Janice. Her, Floyd, Nora, and Moog were in the recording part of the basement. They were watching the doc and Zoot through the glass. 

“Yeah, who am I kidding? I’m no ivory tickler” said the ginger haired male. 

“I can’t even ding the dang triangle” he added as he pulled out the triangle and tried to play it. No sound was made from the metal triangle. 

“What?” asked the dark blue haired male. 

“See? Doesn’t sound good” replied Teeth, his voice sounding so upset and stressed. “See?” he added. 

“And after he dings the dang, then comes explosive rebellion” said Floyd. 

“Enough! I don’t need you!” snapped the good doctor as he slammed his hand on the keyboard. His fingers had some long sharp nails on them. He points at the saxophonist. 

“I don’t need my parents! I don’t need triangles!” he added with a hiss of a cat. 

“In fact, I rejectify shapes of all kinds. Even the rhombus” said the doc as he moved his hand in a sassy, bossy way. 

“Then comes explosive regret,” said the blonde female. The red haired male nods his head. 

“Oh, I am so sorry,” said Dr. Teeth as he brought Zoot into a bear hug but it felt like a snake was squeezing him to death. He groans as his lover hugs him so tight. “I’m so sorry” said the ginger haired male as he hugs his short lover to death. 

“And this is nothing compared to the next phase, which is a very abrupt flashbac-” Floyd Pepper started to say before the flashback cut him off. 

The flashback starts. Pomp and circumstance was playing in front of a dental school for dentists. Teeth was probably 20 or in his early 20s. He had graduated from the school to be a dentist like his mother wanted him to be. The ginger haired male was wearing his graduating outfit which was a black robe with some purple on it. His hair had grown out where now it was in a small man bun under his hat. He was now up to his father’s shoulder in his height. 

Tina was filled with so much joy, she was proud of her son.  She was wearing a pink and orange dress suit with a gold necklace with a gold tooth on it. Her earrings were white fangs of wolves, they were real. Her sleeve of her dress suit was short which revealed a huge scar on her right arm. A wereanimal hunter cause the wound when Teeth and his siblings were three weeks old kittens. 

“Oh, my baby boy is a certified tooth doctor,” said Tina with a smile as she gently pitched his cheek. 

“Like your late great granddaddy said, “May your spit cups always overflow with good fortune” she added. 

“Ain’t that right, Gerald?” asked the ginger haired female. 

“Yep,” replied her husband. He was wearing a baby blue suit with a red bow tie. The dark brown hair male had his camera with him and was smiling with happiness for his son. 

“Aww, thanks for all those wonderful words, mama” replied Teeth. His voice had the deep growl to it now but is ain’t loud like his present self. “And that nice one from you, too, Daddy,” he added. 

“Well, it is about to get nicer,” replied his mother as she revealed a solid gold floss case. Tina chuckles as she sees her son’s eyes go wide in shock. 

He gently took it out of his mother’s hand. “Great Granddaddy’s solid floss case?” asked Junior. 

“Indeed” replied the ginger haired female. 

“Now, you go say bye to your dental friends while we go get the Molar Express” she added. 

“Come one, Gerald” said Tina as she and her husband leaves. 

“Thank you, mama. Thank you, daddy” replied their son. 

“Move your little tushy, Gerald” said Tina to her dark brown haired lover. 

“Hey” said Luna, one of Teeth’s sisters. She was holding Flora, his younger sister. Luna has long dark brown hair that was in a bun. She had a pink nose like their mother. Luna was chubby like Junior. She had on was a light purple dress with some dark purple high heels. 

“Hey” replied the doc. 

“Great job on becoming a dentist” she replied with a smile. 

“Brother!” said Flora as she reached for her older brother. He chuckles as he picks her up. Flora had long hair that had dark brown at the roots and the bottom of her hair while the middle was ginger color. Her nose is pink like Luna’s nose. She was wearing a light blue dress that had some flowers on it, she also had some black dress shoes with white socks under it. 

“Hey Flora, happy to see your big brother become a dentist?” asked Teeth with a smile. 

“Yeah!” replied his little sister with a smile. The moment was cut short when Liam, Teeth’s other brother came running and hid behind him. They look to see what scares Liam and it was Xavier, Teeth’s little brother who was holding a full on rat. 

Xavier is Flora’s twin brother. They were both six years old. He has ginger hair with brown fluffy eyebrows like their father. His nose was pink like his sisters’ noses. He had a shitty grin on his face as he tried to get Liam to scream like a girl. “How the hell did he catch a rat?” Junior asked himself. 

“Xavier! Stop!” whimper Laim as he hides behind the doc. He had long dark brown hair that was put in a ponytail, also brown fluffy eyebrows like their father. He had an orange nose like the good doctor. People get confused between Liam and Gerald because they look like clones of each other except for their heights. Their father was the tallest one out of their family. 

“Xavier! Leave Liam alone!” hissed Luna as she picked up the small boy with her free hand. She groans as their little brother starts to throw a tantrum. 

“We’re going to catch up with mama and daddy” she said to Teeth before leaving. 

“Thank you” said Liam to Junior. 

“Of course, no problem,” he replied with a chuckle. 

“See you” he said before following their other siblings. 

After they leave, Teeth suddenly hears a guitar strumming nearby. He looks over to see Floyd who look so different now, on a bench. He was playing his guitar. 

The red haired male had a full mustache that he has in the present. He isn’t wearing any glasses. Floyd Pepper was wearing a green army jacket with a gray t-shirt under it.  Also had some blue jeans on with some brown boots. The red haired male had his long red hair in a ponytail like Liam and was wearing a dark green hat. 

Floyd was vocalizing as the good doctor walked over. He suddenly stopped while he noticed Teeth. “Oh! Hey there! I know you. Future Doctor Man, right?” said the red haired male. Junior looked around before he realized he was talking to him. “Or should I say, Present Doctor Man? Remember me from the music shop?” asked Floyd Pepper with a smile. 

“Oh, yeah” replied Teeth. “I barely recognize you with the mustache and no glasses,” he added. 

“Yeah, well, I grew them out and threw them out,” replied Floyd. The ginger haired male chuckles. 

“Do I walk into walls sometimes? You bet” he added with a chuckle. 

“But now, I just let the music be my guide,” said the red haired male. 

“Well, I salute that, Sarge.” replied Junior. 

“Actually, I got dishonorably discharged from West Point for turning Taps into a jazz odyssey.” replied Floyd. They both laugh. 

“And now I’m just following my dreams. Kinda like you?” he added. 

“Yeah. Yeah, I suppose so” replied the doc. 

“Yeah” replied the red haired male. He mess up a note on the guitar which causes the note to be discordant. 

“I still can’t get the hang of that last string” said Floyd Pepper. 

“Say, have you ever thought about playing the bass guitar?” asked the ginger haired male. 

“Mmm. Less strings, less fingers. You are smart, Doc” replied Floyd with a soft smile. They both chuckle. 

“Hey, that reminds me. I’ve been holding on to something for you” he added as he reached to get something out of his guitar case. It was the harmonica that Teeth played at the music shop when he was 16. The good doctor’s eyes got wide. He couldn’t believe that he kept it for him. 

“Here you go” said Floyd as he held it out to the other male. 

“Come on!” replied Junior in shock. “I can’t believe you have that” he added as he gently take the harmonica from the red haired male. 

“Well, I always wanted to thank you for that bridge you gave me,” replied Floyd Pepper. 

“You know…” he started to say before he played it. “How about taking it for another spin?” asked the red haired male with a smile on his face. 

“Oh, no, thanks. No, no, I’m no musician. I don’t even know how to…” Junior started to say before he started playing the harmonica. 

“That’s it,” said Floyd. Teeth chuckles. “Come on, now” added the red haired male. 

Suddenly, the sound of the Molar Express’s horn filled the air. Teeth’s parents were back with the bus. Teeth’s siblings look at their brother who was with Floyd Pepper. Luna couldn't believe her brother was that good at music. 

“All aboard, Junior” said Tina as she opened the door to the express. Junior stops and looks at his mother in fear. She gasped when she saw the red haired male again.

 “Are you fraternizing with that music hooligan again?” asked the ginger haired female with venom in her tone. 

“Well, your father won’t allow it. Ain’t that right, Gerald?” she added. 

“Yep” replied Gerald. 

Teeth look at the solid gold floss case then the harmonica. He hands the harmonica back to Floyd. “Thanks again, but you best keep that. And good luck with your dream, Sarge” said Junior. 

“You, too, Doc. You, too” replied Floyd. 

The flash back ends, Teeth’s fingers move quickly across the keyboard. He was playing frenetically. “Nothing like a fantabulous little flashback to get those fingerlings aflying!” said the doc. “Whoo!” he added. 

“Whoo is right!” replied Nora with a smile. “Does it mean this whole process is done?” she asked. 

“No, no,” replied Janice. “This is just, like, his phase of manic prosperity” she added. 

“You know what? I’ll take it” replied the black haired female. “I mean, look at him go!” Label Lady added. 

“Moog, please tell me” she started to say before he cut her off. 

“Recording every note” replied Moog. 

“Dude, I could kiss you right now,” she replied. The black haired male blushes. 

“Yeah, I’m just doing my job,” he replied. 

“Nora,” said Animal. 

“Oh!” replied Moog. “Yep” he replied. 

“We all know you dig Nora” said the black haired male. The drummer was breathing heavily. He slowly put his hand on Moog’s chest. 

“Nora” replied the wild man.

“Oh, wow. Your hand on my heart now” replied Moog in a nervous tone. 

“Nora,” replied Animal. 

“Okay” the black haired male replied. 

“Hey, look, I got work to do here, buddy. All right? So maybe no more Nora-ing?” he added. 

“Okay” replied the drummer before leaving. 

“All right,” he replied with some nervous chuckles. The wild man start repeating “Nora” over and over again. 

[lorspolairepeluche]

Fun fact: Alphinaud and Alisaie are (legally) (on the Azim Steppe anyway) Oday's kids.

It was an impulse decision in the wake of Fourchenault's disowning of them at that meeting in Gridania to speak up and ask for a point of clarification -- not on Sharlayan's decision, but on Master Fourchenault's other, more personal reason for the meeting. "You are...relinquishing all familial claim to Alphinaud and Alisaie?"

"They are no longer part of my house."

"Indeed. Then I see no reason to not make their adoption into my family official, should they consent." They spared Fourchenault not another glance as they turned to the twins. "Do you?"

Alphinaud and Alisaie kind of just...stared for a second, but they both recognized that gleam in Oday's eye as the particular kind they got when sticking it to some uppity bastard for the sake of their loved ones. So they both nodded.

Oday nodded back, face never changing from a mild, diplomatic expression, and looked back to Fourchenault. "Then, Master Leveilleur, I must ask you to hasten your exit. You have insulted and demeaned beloved and respected members of the Solongo tribe, and as its khan, I cannot abide such behavior toward those in my care."

Fourchenault, as Fourchenault does, kept his composure, asking only a clipped, "...I beg your pardon?"

"I believe you heard me, ser." Oday folded their arms, never breaking eye contact. "You're upsetting my kids."

(This was supported and made slightly less ridiculous of a situation by literally all of the Warriors of Light leveling stares on Fourchenault that all had the same intense degree of our kids now in them.)

After the meeting, as they went to prepare to battle lunar primals, Oday said to the twins, apropos of nothing, "Let's get ice cream after."

They did, indeed, treat Alphie and Alisaie to ice cream, and Oday talked with them about their childhood for the first time. They explained that their mother disowned them too, in all but name, and they had an honest heart-to-heart about forging your own path when your parents turn their backs. Finding those who will support and care for you and whom you will support and care for in return, working through the grief of distance from those you looked up to. Oday had been through the lack of support and love from those who were supposed to care for them, and they were absolutely not going to let that happen to these two. And they assured Alphinaud and Alisaie: "That wasn't performative, that declaration. You are Solongo now, and I am honored to be a part of your family and to have you as part of mine. Beyond that, I'm your godsdamned friend. You know you can call on me when you need me, 'cause I love you. That hasn't changed. Never will. This just made it official. Made me honor-bound to love you. Easiest promise I've ever made."

It was less "official" than other Steppe adoptions, but the twins are legally, on the Steppe, Alphinaud Leveilleur Solongo and Alisaie Leveilleur Solongo, first children of the tribe and most beloved of Oduyanga Khan, and if Oday takes anything seriously in their life, it's found family. They made themself a steadfast support for Alphie and Alisaie, counsel (such as it was) and guardian.

[wwwdotstardotnet]

My thoughts & feelings on Loki

Thought I should give my two-cents given the debate occurring right now. I will discuss:

Sylvie

Kevin Wrong

Lokius

Sylki(e)

This is just my thoughts! None of this is objective (none of this is fact, necessarily) it is simply my take on the situation(s).

Sylvie

No sugarcoating it; they majorly fucked Sylvie’s character this season. The writing seemed off, and if you removed every scene with Sylvie in it, the story would still make perfect sense. I hate that, because I love Sylvie. First season she was so badass! She was a strong character. This season she was a filler. She did not have any development, which would be fine if they had written her as a static character this season. But they didn’t. They wrote her dialogue at the end as if she’d gone through some revelation of some kind, when in reality she was literally returning to where she had been at the beginning of the season. They wrote her like shit. I am very upset about it.

Sylki(e)

I would not call myself “anti-sylki.” However, I personally feel uncomfortable by the incestuous nature of the ship (they have the same parents). I am not uncomfortable with it because it “ruins my ship,” because shipping wars are fucking dumb. I can admit part of me just… doesn’t like the ship. That being said, there is something to be discussed with the Lokius vs Sylki ship debate; I have seen a few Lokius shippers being sexist about Sylvie. I have seen many more fetishizing MLM relationships. I hate that. You should not SHIP something and use your ship as an excuse to be a bigot or a creep. Another point I see some people bringing up is related to queerness. There’s this ridiculous argument that Lokius shippers are only wanting queer relationships; that they don’t like Sylki because it’s het. My question is: Is Sylki straight? Because, in my eyes, we have two bisexual genderfluid characters. That is, inherently, queer. Regardless, because of the presentation of the two characters as cis in the show, it also feels a bit like queer erasure. What I’m saying is: if they had explored the identities a bit more, the queerness of both characters? I still wouldn’t be comfortable. It just doesn’t feel right to me. Having said that: ship away! My discomfort should not (and does not) dictate your ship. Not when, in technicality, there isn’t truly anything harmful about Sylki. I may make an entire post discussing the queerness of Sylki, so stay tuned.

Lokius

Heads up— I’m a Lokius shipper. That being said, I also have the ability to go about an analysis without being too biased (I hope). Continue with this knowledge in mind.

I despise the MLM fetishization aspect of this ship. There are a lot of cishet girls doing this in the fandom. If that sentence makes you feel defensive, you might be one of them. Look into that.

Additionally, I want to stress so hard that Loki is not a man. He is genderfluid. Even Kevin Wrong confirmed that much. Lokius is still queer. It was always queer. It is, however, definitely not just MLM. Just wanted to point that out.

Continuing from the Sylvie sexism— while I’m sure some Lokius shippers are indeed being sexist, think about it the other way around, too. Why does Sylvie need a love interest? So many women in film and TV are cast simply as love interests. Sylvie doesn’t need to be. She doesn’t DESERVE to be boiled down to that. She’s powerful, and the writers took that away from her this season, and it makes me angry. Regardless of my feelings, the idea that she must be in a relationship with a “man” (again— neither Sylvie nor Loki are “men” or “women”, but for the sake of simplicity I’m just going to refer to them as such since Marvel&Disney can’t take their heads out of their asses). That idea— doesn’t that feel a little demeaning? Can’t she live her life without a romantic connection to a man? I don’t know. I just think the situation has much more nuance than “Lokius shippers sexist!11!!1!!1!”

Kevin Wrong

I don’t really have much to say about him, to be honest. “We can’t see inside Loki’s head” made me actually laugh out loud. What, in the everloving fuck do you mean by that, sir?! You are his thoughts, in a manner of speaking. You WRITE HIS THOUGHTS. It’s the most bullshit excuse for queerbaiting I’ve ever fucking heard, actually. Absolutely ridiculous. Again, however, this one’s biased because of my Lokius shipper status as a person. It just feels like a lame excuse for lack of representation.

Thank you for reading my word vomit!! Altogether, I loved this show. It’s just flawed, like most shows are. It could have been more inclusive, like most shows can be. Writers are people, too, though, and not everyone has as much freedom of speech in that field as you’d think they do— regardless of what the writers might have wanted, Disney’s S&P most likely would not have okay-ed the queer relationship. Kevin Wrong was one writer; keep that in mind. He’s one cishet writer in the writer’s room with many other people. He might just be a bumbling idiot, guys. He might just be.

ANYWAYS! Ship what you want (as long as it’s not harmful)! Don’t harass other people for their ships!!!!!! BE KIND. ETC. IT’S ALMOST NEVER THAT DIRE— FANFICTION EXISTS, HEADCANONS EXIST!!! I understand it’s disappointing if your ship doesn’t go canon, but sometimes you don’t get what you want. And that’s okay!

[professorlegaspi]

Buckle up kiddos because you’re about to get an in depth character analysis of our favorite unnamed character ever: Josh Rumble’s sister!

Major disclaimer before I start: info on this girl is few and far between. I did not reread the whole series and I could have missed something. If you find something unmentioned in this essay TELL ME. Do not be shy. No, I will not be mad. Yes, I will want to hear. I am rabid about this woman.

The biggest source of information we DO have about Josh’s Sister (from here on referred to as JS) is her conversation with Celia in the Gathering Storm. The bulk of this essay will focus on that scene, but I want to mention the other small tidbits that exist.

We basically have 3 facts found outside of The Summer Tournament.

1) JS is older than Josh Rumbles

2) JS taught Josh how to dance

3) JS gave Josh an e-reader for Christmas in The Final Word.

This tells us a couple more things.

1) Her family celebrates Christian holidays

2) JS is good at gift giving

3) JS has disposable income

Okay cool. So JS is in contact with her family who are either Christian or culturally Christian, she knows how to dance, and she loves her brother. Baseline stuff.

Now the spicy bit - the Summer Tournament.

For those who may have forgotten, Josh’s team won the Renasci Soccovolle tournament so now they’re going to nationals. The one that year is in Florida, and all of Josh’s friends have come out to watch him play.

Yes, you are remembering correctly. This is the stage of The Kiss. Josh kisses Celia, she slaps him, it gets caught on camera, it’s on the front cover of every newspaper. Josh is pissed, Celia is pissed, and JS is pissed.

Celia and co. are staying at a hotel for the tournament. They have nearby rooms, and Josh is staying with his teammates, presumably in the same hotel. It is unclear what JS’s rooming situation is.

Josh apologizes to Celia in the hotel lobby, and it ends with him storming away. JS confronts Celia directly afterwards, so we can infer the JS has seen the conversation.

The first thing we learn about JS is her appearance.

She is tall, and gorgeous. She has blue eyes, mahogany hair, and her two most notable descriptors are “cool” and “sophisticated.” If there is any archetype she fits it is “The Bitch.”

Fittingly, she starts off the conversation bitchy.

She “stud[ies] her fingernails” for much of the following conversation. She is an absolute drama queen.

JS goes on to explain why she’s there. “I was here to watch my brother play. Our parents couldn’t make it.”

I would like to take a minute to remind everyone that Josh, for much of the summer, had been complaining because the one year he made it the Summer Tournament it was in Florida, the state where he lived.

The summer tournament is in Florida - where Josh lives - and his parents couldn’t make it. I think we all can agree that that’s a little weird.

They’re either poor and can’t veherate, thus making travel difficult, Josh’s tournament isn’t considered a priority for them (:/).

This next part is interesting:

“I guess he talks about you a lot.” On the surface, this tells us that JS and Josh communicate frequently.

However, that clause “I guess” is strange. There’s no real reason to add it. Her message still comes across - indeed, is more impactful - without it. So the fact that it’s there speaks to habit. She’s used to either tempering herself and her opinions, or she’s used to hiding her relationship with her brother.

And then, and THEN!

“You didn’t have to make it so public.”

That is a loaded sentence. The implications there are scalding. This changes everything.

This sentence is pivotal because it tells us why she’s upset - why she’s picking a fight.

JS does not care that Josh has a crush on Celia. That is for him to work out. She does not care that Celia turned him down. That is for them to work out. She does not even care that Celia slapped him. Look at the sentence above. “Are you often in the habit of humiliating your friends?” she asks. Not ‘hitting’ not ‘injuring’ not ‘slapping.’ Humiliating.

JS does not care that Celia hit her brother. She cares that it happened publicly.

JS cares about Josh’s reputation.

With that revelation, I want to return to her descriptions. “Polish and sophistication” is what Celia notes about her contenance. Knowing that JS cares deeply about how her brother is seen, and therefore cares deeply about how she is seen, the air of “polish” cannot be anything but deliberate.

JS either wants to, or feels like she has to, be exceedingly presentable even on a Sunday morning travel-day.

This could be a result of being overlooked as a woman, but I think especially because her reaction to Josh’s “humiliation” was so strong, it is probably a quirk of her upbringing.

Contrast that with Josh. He’s constantly choking on his own masculinity. He’s a jock, he doesn’t know how to communicate his feelings, he is uncomfortable even when other people communicate their feelings, he has a fairly gruff exterior and feels threatened by other men.

Something about JS and Josh’s upbringing has caused them to feel that they have to perform gender roles very hard, and has also made JS see violence coming from a loved one as less important than reputation.

WHAT is their home life???

Genuinely. Something is Going On.

Whatever it was, it caused Josh to almost never mention it. He never calls his sister by name, and it is only though passing comments that we know they have a relationship. And we know nothing, truly zilch, about his parents.

So, to conclude.

JS comes from a … rocky home life. She cares about her brother. She is protective of her brother. She buys him expensive Christmas presents. He tells her about his friends and Celia. She listens.

She cares about being taken seriously, and beyond being very beautiful seems to have secured a well-paying job. She is very curt when she speaks, and likes to let people come to their own conclusions. She doesn’t offer her name and Josh never mentions it.

After the Gathering Storm she is never seen again.

[justhyunhoer]

Midnight surprise ♡

Masterlist

Pairings : hwang hyunjin X Lee min ho , hyunlix and minsung as besties.

Warnings: it's an AU, kisses, anxiety(not really), midnight date, holding hands.

Mid winters were going on when suddenly out of the blue minho and hyunjin decided to share the bucket list they made for the season , cause they didn't had any better thing to talk upon during their brake. Usually they sit with their group but today it turned out that they all were gone for some reason.

Minho's was simple : visiting his parents, buying toys for his cats , going to an amusement park with his bestie jisung , and a movie date with his friends.

Hyunjin was quiet upset cause the other didn't had anything to do with him, but anyways it wasn't like he was his boyfriend or something cause Hyunjin was too shy to confess, morely scared .

"What are your plans hyunjin? "

"Aghh, it's nothing much hyung . I just want to have a hot cup of noodles,late at night, when it's really chilly at..you know those red snack carts ?"

"Those type they show in dramas ?" Minho asked with an amused smile, which in response hyunjin bite his lips out of nervousness thinking whether the older found his wish weird or something.

"Yes, it's simple right..." His voice trailed down ,as this particular wish is always left unfulfilled at the end , and probably that will remain unchanged for this year too.

Minho noticed that hyunjin was quiet down after that and he knew that this simple wish of him was quiet difficult as their hostel restricted them going out of the university premises after 8 pm to avoid any kind of nuisance that would ruin their reputation (problems of the prestigious ones). Bit crazy but facts.

Challenge accepted

This was the perfect chance for minho to ask hyunjin out in a romantic way which he himself never thought of. It is challenging cause sneaking out of their dormitories wasn't easy at all but minho have to take the risk for his crush.

"Are you sure you want to do this, hyung!?" Jisung exclaimed after minho asked him for help . "I am , that's why I asked you sungie." Minho sighed and plopped down on his bed as already a week passed after their chat and the homework they gave was immense. But still minho managed to study the possible ways that they could sneak out,  but they were all too dangerous,  that's when he remembered that han mentioned something about his friends sneaking out or so not too long ago,

" Okay,  let's meet Chan , changbin and seungmin first, and then you can decide whether it's a good idea or not."

***

Now the task was easy as he just had to butter the security guard properly and done!

He'll  probably meet him around 9 as he had a night shift.

***

Minho left the room when jisung was still fully engaged in completing a work of music that their department assigned them.

"Ajjushi,  pleaseee..."

"No means no."

"I've never ever sneaked before ! Just this time , please."

"You want me to fall for that?"

"It's matter of love! Just this once, I promise I wont create any trouble,  pleasee..."

"Aghh, kids these days! "

With lot more pleading , minho received the permission . But there was a condition that if they won't return until 5 , they would get into a problem cause that's when his shift ends. This indeed was the safest way to sneak out without ending up into the principal's office.

Okay now I have to find a location and text hyunjin. Perfect!

-----

[12 :00]

Minho : hey, jinne. Are you free right now?

(few minutes later)

Hyunjin : yes, what's the matter?

Minho : nothing much , dress up warmly and come over to my dorm.

Hyunjin : why hyung? Is something wrong?

Minho : just come here! Stop questioning!

Hyunjin: okay hyungiee <3

-----

"What's up jinnie at this hour?" Felix questioned as hyunjin paused the drama they were watching on lix's laptop.

Hyunjin started jumping on the bed happily, making noises, leaving Felix confused. he decided to look at his bestfriend's then displaying mobile screen.

"OH MY GOD! HWANG HYUNJIN!" Felix got up and shook his shoulders with a wide amused yet happy grin. "Hurry up jinnie! You have to doll up!" Felix said pulling the taller down the bed and rumbled through their closet, looking for a suitable clothing.

"You have to make him fall for you today!" Felix said picking an outfit "But lix...WhY he wants me there at THIS hour?" Hyunjin said , thinking about every possible reasons , but found none. "Dunno, stop overthinking, jinnie." Hyunjin nodded and did his hair , honestly just combed it and ran his hand through them . Clean yet messy look. Perfect.

"Lix this won't do ! He told me to dress warmly " hyunjin whined and threw the crop top at the other's face . Felix just giggled and selected a creamish knitted sweater and regular blue pants. Hyunjin applied his cherry lip balm and nothing else. Finally after 15 mins he took his jacket and left .

His heart was beating abnormally if that's what it's said , he read the digits 501 and knocked twice. Minho opened the door and instead of giving hyunjin way in, he came out and locked the door behind him. His assumption was correct ,hyunjin came without a muffler and it was pretty chilly out there...more than usual.

Minho handed him two hot hand packs and settled a muffler around his neck , this action startled the younger. "H..hyung why these- What are you planning!?" His eyes widened at the time when minho said , "Emptying your bucketlist."

Minho held his hand and started walking away, "Are we- hyung! Noo!" He whined "Yes we are , you whiny baby." Minho smiled in his direction, feet never forgetting their way.

On their way down hyunjin again interrogated "but what If we get caught ?" His hot breath making little white fog appear in front of his lips. "Remember, I have muffler instead of tissues here." "You are tough lee min ho. " hyunjin teasingly sighed . "I know right." Usually minho would bicker back but today was different, right?

"Why are we following the normal way out?"

"Trust me jinnie, will you ?"

"I was just curious though..."

He pouted and followed him like a baby duckling following the mother duck. He felt weird when the security gave them a thumbs up when minho mentioned his name but also received a questioning look where the brunette nodded in response with a wide smile.

____

Felix : hey, sungiee

Jisung: yes ,lixiee

Felix : where are you ?

Jisung: at the dorm, why? ...Okay hyung took jinnie on a date !

Felix: date? You mean he's gonna propose him !?

Jisung: yes! And he didn't wanted to spoil it hence, I didn't told you.

Felix: you meaniee

Jisung : lol sorry, an don't you dare text hyunjin!

Felix : I won't!

Jisung : go to bed now, they'll be late...

Felix: are they ....

Jisung : nope.

Felix : oh okay

Jisung: go to bed nowww!

Felix : nope, gotta complete the drama first!

Jisung : I just can't-

Felix : heheheh byeee

_____

***

Minho never imagined the situation that they are in right now : walking side by side with hyunjin on a cold winter night with beautiful night sky , illuminated by the stars and moon. Cold breeze hitting their skin where hyunjin's half face is covered with the muffler that minho gave him, his pink tinted cheeks still slightly visible though an him taking little glances at the younger during their little talks , here and there. Everything was just perfect.

Right now they were laughing on a random joke minho said , to minho the laughing hyunjin in front of him was all he needed at te moment. The way his eyes almost disappeared and that smile he was flashing right now did things to minho .

"You look pretty, jinnie."

The sudden compliment from the older made hyunjin's heart skip a beat. A red color covered his cheeks which wasn't because of the cold weather.

"You didn't meant that, did you?" Hyunjin said hoping a 'I did' just to get disappointed by "You're smart hwang hyunjin !" Minho joked and laughed to recieve a "Yaah!" And a playful slap on his arm .

It was now hyunjin's chance to admire him... From last 20 mins he's trying to suppress the urge to hold minho's hand and honestly that was the only thing he needed to make this moment perfect, after all he won't ruin this already perfect moment , which was a night date with him by asking that . Well, that's what he thought.

"We're here! " Minho joyfully exclaimed and turned off the maps when he spotted a red snack cart and turned off the maps. Just few steps and hyunjin's wish would be fulfilled.

***

"Two hot noodles please! " minho cheerfully made the order when hyunjin was looking for a table which were settled there. They were 4 in total , two empty, and the remaining two had one couple and a group of employees. He finally picked one which was around a tree, which was a small round table with two chairs .

Minho came with their bowls on a tray and returned it later,

"Mmmm, yummy!" Hyunjin expressed with his entire body and the older giggled. "Eat well !" Minho said taking his first bite an had same expression as him.

"By the way, what were you doing when u texted you?"

"Watching a drama with lixie."

"Really ? Even when the work they gave to our departmentwas hectic? " minho widened his eye.

"They can always wait , lol." Hyunjin laughed and minho sighed, shaking his head in disbelief.

Their bowls were half empty by the time hyunjin halted their talks and beautifully smiled at the other, he was never this expressive (being dramaticis other thing ) but the happiness he was feeling today was just too much for him to contain. This sudden action of the younger made minho bit self conscious. Few seconds them admiring eachother and this time minho was the one who was flustered.

"Thank you hyung, I really mean it." Hyunjin broke the silence and it was one of the rarest times when minho's brain wasn't able to process a answer, just mesmerized by the boy sitting in front of him.

"W..wellcome....?" He blamed himself for stuttering and not looking in hyunjin's eyes. Before hyunjin can ease him for the same he clenched his fists and took a deep breath in order to muster up the courage for the thing he was planning to do.

Whereas hyunjin was just starting at his face trying to read what the other was up to.

"Hwang hyunjin, I know it's not the best way to ask anyone out , probablythe worst, but I like you and will you be my boyfriend ?" Minho literally rapped and white fog appearing in front of his lips as he relieved a sigh. He opened his eyes to meet the boy with widened eyes and a hand over his lips. Hyunjin's brain was malfunctioning right now.

Nothing changed for the last 5 seconds and then...

"It's okay hyunjin if it's a n-"

He was cutted off by something soft as cloud and plump, they were hyunjin's lips. Yes, right now he is being kissed by hyunjin who was bending over that small table to reach him , which minho gave in. He was on cloud nine right now. The kiss wasn't deep , just their lips pressed against eachother.

They pulled away soon when they heard cheers and claps around them, only to find out that people around them were cheering for them. They both were flustered for a second , blushing and smiling at the strangers.

Then hyunjin realized what he actually did, actually when minho stared speaking fir the other time, hyunjin's lips made their way to minho's without hyunjin knowing, in a hurry because his mind stopped functioning properly and the kdrama style response was all it thought about at that time.

They finished their remaining bowls without uttering a single word. Cause both of them needed some time to digest what just happened.

"I'll pay."

"O-okay."

Hyunjin prepared himself when Minho went to pay.

Hwang hyunjin, you got this. You're now lee minho's boyfriend. Calm down, calm down. He likes you too. YOU'RE DATING HIM NO-

His thoughts were halted when...

"Let's go." Minho smiled and offered his hand to hyunjin , which hyunjin grinned and held, now he was relieved, completely.

They started walking, hands in hand. This was a like dream to hyunjin: his crush asking him out, his pending wish (since years) getting fulfilled, more importantly him kissing his crush (now boyfriend) and right now walking hands in hands with him on a chilly winter night.

"Hyung, we're dating...?" It was a more like a question.

"Let me clear your doubt." Minho said , facing hyujin.

Hyunjin was confused, "hu-" it was now his turn to be cutted off with a kiss.

Minho tilted the younger's face with one hand and grabbed his neck with another and engaged him in a kiss, this one was a lot different than the previous one. This one was deep and passionate, filled with love. It wasn't a heated one but indeed was deep.

Hyunjin started feeling light headed, fully submitting himself to his boyfriend, resting his hands around his waist. After a minute or so ,both of them pulled apart to refill their lungs.

"Clear?"

"As Crystal."

"Good."

Minho ruffled hyunjin's hair and started walking away, hands in his pocket, leaving hyunjin behind. "Hey! Wait for me." Hyunjin caught up , clinging onto the others arm. "Your little rap was pretty good hyung! You can even beat Jisung if you try." Hyunjin joked, nudging.

"Muffler"

"Algetseumnida."

To minho, the sound of their laugh was beautiful, the night was beautiful, hyunjin's smile was beautiful, the way hyunjin felt was beautiful, his scent was beautiful, everything was beautiful, hyunjin himself was beautiful.

Their way back was full of jokes and teasing, no matter what their relationship with eachother is, one thing was for sure that they'll never miss a chance to tease eachother, specifically hyunjin.

***

Minho's room number was 501 where hyunjin's was 608. So today hyunjin got the chance to drop his boyfriend off (so drama-ish).

"Stop it hwang. "

"Let me walk you hyunggg, pweasee." Hyunjin tugged onto the others jacket with a whiny pout.

"Got it , got it."

Even though minho was acting this way from the outside, but truth to be told, he was loving it.

At minho's dorm:-

When minho entered the room , jisung was sleeping peacefully. But by the time he removed his jacket and shoes jisung was up on the bed. Ready to shoot loads of questions.

"It's 3 in the morning sungie, go to sleep, I'll you tommorow." Minho said knowing his friend way too well, adjusting himself I'm his comforter and turning off the lamps.

"Dang! Just tell me how it went then,"

"It was well. Wait, well is an understatement. "

"You better tell me each and every detail tommorow! "

"Got it, goodnight~"

Seems like neither minho or hyunjin were gonna sleep tonight.

At hyunjin's dorm:-

Hyunjin expected Felix to be waiting for him, excited to know what happened between them two. But as soon as hyunjin entered the dorm, he saw that te lights were off and Felix was sleeping like a 2 year old in front of the laptop screen, where drama was still playing on it.

He tucked the boy under the comforter on his bed properly.

Hyunjin went to his own later , somehow his hand unconsciously touching his lips. And te man was smiling like a weirdo , feeling of minho's soft lips was still lingering on his own. He spent the remaining night burying his face in pillow and throwing his legs up and down, remembering the events.

His head was replaying the scene where minho tilted hyunjin's face and the way his-

STOP IT HWANG HYUNJIN !

STOP IT LEE MINHO !

The case was the same with both. But eventually they drifted to sleep , thanks to the work their university gave.

(I saw a tiktok where hyunjin mentioned about his bucketlist and him wishing to have a late night snack at those red snack cart...)

[bingwriterxo]

As always I am amazed. Your writing never ceases to make my brain explode in the best possible way. I know this may sound odd, but I actually appreciated Mindy asking Tara about amber. I feel like the way you write Mindy is done so perfectly. She never ceases to make me laugh and I love how she’s alos a very serious character in times when needed. I also loved seeing Tara’s point of view on the conversations. The hurt and grief at a lost of a best friend is still looming for tara, but I feel like in time the wound will heal. I believe it’s more of a betrayal then anything else. Tara interacting with readers doorman was absolutely everything I needed at 12 am. The saluting was my favorite 😂😂 and I didn’t feel bad because in grade school I had a teacher who I would salute everyday as I walked into class…yes I was indeed the nerd who fact checked history dates 😂 maybe that’s why I love reader so much, she’s a character close to my heart. I love the fact that reader put effort into there date. Her cooking…even when she doesn’t have much experience makes my heart beat! How cute is she!!!

I need a reader. Seriously. Oh how hard is it find a Shakespeare lass.😂

And the fact that she said I love you first took my surprise!!! In all my thoughts and ideas I had about museum tara I always thought tara would be the one to say it first. Mostly because in the early chapters she’s such a simp. Really. She is. As for there first time you do not disappoint. Everything was so well written and I absolutely loved reader turning her Shakespeare bust! 😂😂 I honestly think this was your best chapter yet. Truly! As for the mentions of my favorite brothers I love hearing that Nate is taking his role in the play seriously, and that Edmund hates it. 😂 readers parents asking about tara made me so happy mostly because I know tara will grow to love them with time. I’m writing this currently at 12 am so I hope this is coherent enough.

bing….you are a amazing writer. Simply the best. I cannot wait for what you have in mind for tara and reader. I hope you had a great day and continue to do so!!!

i wanted to make sure that anyone who doesn't really look at the asks knows that tara 100% does not love amber anymore. plus, i just feel like most friends would talk about that kinda stuff anyway

tara and Carmine are besties now, u cant tell me otherwise. and R tried her very best to cook...too bad they barely ate any of the dinner tho

to me, really, tara 100% fell first but R 100% fell harder. obvi we don't see as much from R because we can't read her thoughts, but that's what i think

i think R was real upset that tara turned shakespeare around--not because she wanted him to see, but how dare she put him in the corner

there will be more of Nate and Eddie in the next chapter! dont even worry!!

thank u so much bb 🫶 my love goes out to u, and i hope ur also having a great day!!

[punkscowardschampions]

Ruster & Nancy

Rio: [Okay, we are in mid-late Feb of 2031 now, after the Christmas where y’all did the most to ignore each other and had a VERY tense time I am sure, baby Maggie was indeed conceived and Ali has excitedly done the rounds telling the fam]

Rio: When your parents tell you, expect you to think of something cleverer than an I told you so

Buster: I didn’t tell them so, we don’t talk about you

Rio: Definitely what I meant

Rio: but I’m glad the tea time chat isn’t that dire for you all

Buster: It’s obvious what you meant

Rio: You were off anyway, didn’t happen until Christmas

Buster: Within the acceptable margin for error, or in this case Eggnog and Snowballs

Rio: Sure but that’s not romantic and Mama makes everything a story

Buster: I’m not her target audience for a bedtime one, her hands are full

Rio: Should be

Rio: Even the twins think they’re too old for it though, you know how it is, Ava must be the same

Buster: Yeah, [her age rn] going on [a big age cos Ava is that bitch]

Rio: Exactly

Rio: even when it looks like they’re still playing dress-up 

Buster: Nance does, though at what is anyone’s guess

Rio: [naming the brands we know Nancy likes] mannequin

Rio: she looks great though

Buster: She looks like everyone else here, she’s achieving her goal at least

Rio: Isn’t that something you have in common?

Buster: No, my friends wish they looked half as good as I do

Rio: Right 😏

Buster: It is, you’ve seen for yourself often enough

Rio: I can barely remember Christmas

Buster: Why would you want to?

Rio: What good is blocking it out?

Buster: A temporary reprieve still is

Rio: That’s what the 🥂 was for but not trying to make it a habit

Buster: You’ve got years to decide your unhealthy crutch of choice

Rio: Or years to work on not needing one

Buster: Either/or

Rio: You only have faith in yourself, is it

Buster: Your new daddy has all the faith, I don’t doubt he’ll keep you on the straight and narrow where your other nan never could

Rio: Shut up

Rio: I am actually too old for any parenting now and becoming a nun isn’t the 10-year plan

Buster: And any need for the costume is still months away

Rio: And Nance is liable to change her mind last minute so I know better than to get on theme too early, yeah

Buster: I could have equal say about the party planning bullshit if I wanted, bear that in mind

Rio: You think you look better than everyone all the time, you’ve no need to mastermind it

Buster: Less of an opinion more of a fact

Rio: There’s always enough guests for you to avoid me

Rio: no need to try to make me look bad

Buster: I couldn’t make you look any worse than [whatever Nancy’s worse theme has been in his opinion]

Rio: Or [the one you liked the least], that was rough

Rio: Don’t you ever want to have separate parties?

Buster: I will when she upsets me to the extent she deserves to realise how many of our friends prefer me, as of yet, she hasn’t

Rio: A sweet gesture wrapped up in an egotistical facade

Buster: Payback in the form of a guest list

Rio: The baby will be here by then

Buster: I look forward to seeing how you’ll use it as a prop

Rio: You think my new daddy is going to let it out of his sight

Buster: He doesn’t have eyes on any of his other kids

Rio: Not yet

Rio: She was never going to be thrilled when this day came but you can’t keep someone from their kids because you don’t like them

Buster: Of course you can, there’s an entire branch of law dedicated to the pursuit

Rio: Is that what you’re going to do

Buster: God no

Rio: The biggest ick

Buster: Other people’s kids and the endless discussions about them?

Rio: Subtle

Rio: it’s exciting news, there’s not been a baby for ages

Buster: There’s almost constant babies, you’re just desensitised at this point because most of them have come out of your mother

Rio: I’m not desensitised because babies are always a gift, psycho

Rio: you’re such a boy about it

Buster: Gifts are something you can return

Rio: Oh my God

Rio: how can you look at those chubby cheeks and little hands and not want to look after them?

Buster: Because I refuse to be tricked by biology, not to mention, most babies aren’t even cute

Rio: Yes they are!

Rio: ALL babies are cute

Rio: this is because you’ve not been raised with animals

Buster: Nancy and I weren’t, you’ve looked at the newborn pictures

Rio: You were, just a bit pink

Buster: The word is premature, but if you feel like colour coding us, I’d probably pick purple

Rio: You still had the tiny fingernails and the little pouty lips and button nose, like all babies

Rio: I’m not going to collude in this baby slander

Buster: Nor am I in propaganda that encourages your already inevitable underage pregnancy

Rio: Wow, never heard that one before 🙄

Rio: not gonna happen, thank you very much

Buster: You’re welcome for the reminder that isn’t romantic and you aren’t living in a story

Rio: My mama lost out on her childhood and teenage years, I don’t need you to tell me anything, I saw it

Buster: Good, you’d only accuse me of lecturing again

Rio: You love doing it

Buster: I loved your silent treatment more

Rio: I noticed

Buster: So why break it now?

Rio: Why be nice to you?

Buster: Because you can’t help yourself

Rio: Clearly I can

Rio: or I’d not be here now

Buster: You’re here expecting me to help you, the same as before

Rio: Help how, exactly?

Rio: I’m happy they’re having a baby, there’s nothing to be done about it

Buster: You tell me, it’s your expectation

Rio: You’ve made it clear you owe me nothing

Buster: Clearly I haven't, or you’d have nothing to say to me

Rio: You can try again 

Buster: None of my effort is reserved for you

Rio: Then you can get over it 

Buster: And you can take your happy news somewhere else, I’m sure some of the family share your excitement, play the odds

Rio: Fine, do you think that Edie is going to be okay with it, when the shock wears off?

Buster: By the time the shock wears off she’ll have another brother or sister, so, no, I don’t

Rio: I don’t understand why she’s so upset by it

Buster: She’s been raised on fairytales but robbed of her own, I’d feel cheated too if I was her

Rio: But she’s always known it was him, we all have

Rio: I used to feel upset by it too but her daddy wasn’t a much better match for mum than mine

Buster: I barely know her, but I grasp the concept of fighting something you don’t want to accept, even when everyone else has

Rio: Is there anything I can do, in the meantime

Rio: I can’t just sit and watch her wait for something that’s never going to happen now

Buster: There are always things you can do, both for her sanity and to protect yours

Rio: It’s like she wants nothing to do with any of us anymore

Buster: Building a wall gives the illusion of safety, and distance

Rio: Yeah

Rio: and if I could believe it then I could just leave her to it, I would but

Buster: It hurts to want shit you can’t have, whoever’s in your way becomes a target of your lashing out, someone to blame

Rio: I’d sooner be a punching bag than stonewalled

Rio: maybe if I can talk to Django, she would listen to him

Buster: She knows that, which is why she’s not letting you be

Rio: None of us asked for this

Buster: Your mum did

Rio: Okay but have the issue with her

Rio: I’m seen as picking a side when I just want everyone to be happy

Buster: Everyone isn’t and won’t be, by wanting that you’ve picked a side, you’re asking Edie to change her mind, what she wants

Rio: I can’t ask my mum to change hers

Buster: Meaning she has to be the one to compromise, in no world is she going to think that’s anything but unfair

Rio: Right now

Rio: I just have to wait then, for her to come ‘round in her own time

Buster: Putting a time limit on it is for you and everyone else

Rio: I just want it to be better, than it has been since last summer

Buster: She does too, but her definition of what would make her feel better isn’t the same as yours

Rio: We’re a family, we can’t get any more fractured, what we need to do is come closer together

Buster: You can’t force her, her deadbeat dad is her family as well, unfortunately

Rio: He’s never around

Buster: Which she’ll get the opportunity to blame Johnny for more than ever now

Rio: Ughhhhhh

Rio: you’re meant to be giving me some kind of hope here

Buster: You told me to keep my hope for myself, remember

Rio: Hm

Rio: Surprised you do

Buster: I wasn’t blackout until much later

Rio: You weren’t the only one making up for lost time there

Buster: Dry January isn’t very worthwhile otherwise

Rio: You love a challenge

Buster: I rarely actually get one though

Rio: I believe you

Rio: kind of

Buster: Your belief is irrelevant, it’s mine that matters

Rio: Your challenges are in your past, you want that the story, so it is

Buster: Past, present or future, I’ll overcome them regardless

Rio: Why would I root for anything else?

Buster: You can do whatever you want, your actions and feelings don’t affect me

Rio: Okay

Rio: you don’t need to give the speech again

Buster: Don’t I?

Rio: Nope

Rio: I know how irrelevant my existence is to you, that doesn’t change what I’m going to do or say

Buster: Evidently, something we have in common

Rio: I don’t believe you but I don’t have to

Rio: it is what it is

Buster: We are who we are

Rio: Like it or not, boy

Buster: I don’t need to like you, thankfully

Rio: It’d be a waste of your time to hate me

Buster: Indifference doesn’t waste any

Rio: Sure

Rio: if you’re capable of that sort of thing

Buster: There are no limits to what I’m capable of

Rio: It’s not a brag, indifference is the opposite 

Buster: I’m not bragging about anything except being able to do whatever I want to

Rio: Anyone can do that, it’s the easiest thing in the world

Buster: If that was true more people would

Rio: People don’t because they’re trying to be better 

Buster: Ideally, but usually they don’t because they’re scared

Rio: Why would you be scared of getting what you want?

Buster: I’m not

Buster: actions have consequences and other people don’t like facing up to them, that’s all

Rio: Getting what you want isn’t a consequence, it makes you soft

Buster: Not if you work hard every day for it, the negative consequences are for those who don’t get what they want because you did

Buster: like in the example of your mum and Edie, everything has a knock-on effect

Rio: We can all get what we need

Buster: Tell that to Junior’s dad, but you’ll have to find him first

Rio: If he knew what he needed we’d not be in this situation

Buster: You’d be in another, different fuck up of your mum’s making

Rio: It’s not her fault

Buster: Why isn’t it her responsibility to do better? You’re quick to point my apparent flaws out and how I should

Rio: She did better by leaving him, which happened years ago

Buster: She would’ve by leaving him alone in the first place

Rio: What a useless thing to say

Rio: Give up on love and isolate, even if this wasn’t retroactive advice, it still sucks

Buster: It wasn’t love, pretending is what’s useless

Rio: You don’t know that

Rio: If she couldn’t be with Johnny then she deserved to find 2nd best

Buster: We both do

Buster: she’s with him about to have a kid, whatever stopped her then isn’t now, the excuse of can’t is null and void

Rio: You’re bringing up the past

Buster: What do you want me to say, it doesn’t matter?

Rio: Of course it fucking matters but he’s the nutcase kidnapping a child to get revenge, you don’t need to agree with him and blame my ma

Buster: I don’t agree with him, but she isn’t blameless, nothing works like that

Rio: I don’t care about loopholes, there’s right and there’s wrong

Rio: none of us but you claim to be perfect but her wrongs don’t excuse his now

Buster: Fine, I don’t care about coming to his defence

Rio: No shit, you’re doing it to be an arsehole to me as per

Buster: Take a hint and I wouldn’t have to

Rio: You have to problem with me that you claim to, you should be able to keep on subject

Rio: but you never do

Buster: You never listen to me on any subject

Rio: You stopped being interesting and started this charade

Buster: You’re interested exclusively in coming crying to me about shit that isn’t none of my business 

Rio: That’s all you’d reply to, I’m not naive 

Buster: Stop being desperate for my replies

Rio: I need someone to talk to about this

Buster: That someone isn’t me

Rio: Yeah, it is

Rio: you know all the players but you’re not involved

Rio: you can be objective and you’re not an adult so you won’t blab

Buster: I’m involved if you insist on involving me, babe

Rio: You’re not here

Rio: and it could be mutual but you never have any problems so that’s your only

Buster: You aren’t giving me an incentive

Rio: Then I’ll give you a problem

Rio: the oppression points are sorely needed for your UCAS app

Buster: You’ve got the wrong twin if you think I’m going to make yours mine and force myself front and centre

Rio: That’s why I can’t go to Nance, obviously

Rio: I can tell her when my friends or boyfriends are pissing me off but not for this

Buster: I wouldn’t go to her for that if I were you, but that’s your prerogative and mistake to make

Rio: It’s not that deep

Buster: Naturally, she has no depth

Rio: Okay as long as it’s stated you’re the one making the comments right now, we can agree

Buster: Unless I’m really off my face and all bets are off too, I’m not going to tell her

Rio: Me either

Rio: plus I’ve heard you say worse to her face so even if I was that sort of bitch, hardly worth it

Buster: Exactly, she’s my sister, I can say it

Buster: even if I have to threaten anyone else who does

Rio: She has her own friend and boyfriend dramas, for sure

Buster: Don’t start me on either subject

Rio: She’s not going to sleep with any of your friends either, ick doesn’t cover the terrible reputations they have

Buster: She will when the time’s right, like me and my separate birthdays 

Rio: Maybe but right now she doesn’t trust any of them 

Buster: Like I said, she isn’t that stupid

Rio: I think it would weird me out, if I had to share friends with any of my siblings

Buster: None of my friendships are that deep

Rio: I guess you’re just unlucky the separation isn’t easy

Rio: Edie was never going to try to hang with me and mine

Buster: It’s easy to keep tabs on her when we do, I can’t trust her either, not for the sake of our blood tie you claim is super important

Rio: You’d be mortified if she was, admit it

Buster: I’m mortified by her as is, cheers

Rio: You just expect better

Rio: you should probably teach law, you’d love to get paid to lecture people who will listen

Buster: Haven’t you heard, teaching’s for cunts that can’t do

Rio: Allegedly but Rocky became a cop and I think we hate them even more

Rio: he still gets invited to things

Buster: His loss

Rio: Are you going to be a defense lawyer?

Buster: What do you think?

Rio: Almost definitely but it’s been a while since you told me 

Buster: I’m not looking for someone to confide in, you are

Rio: But you can

Buster: I don’t want to

Rio: You could need to 

Buster: I don’t need anything from you

Rio: Alright

Buster: You throw me off balance

Rio: How?

Buster: You just always have

Rio: Your world is too small

Buster: It’s a bubble, I’m counting down to the pop, you already know that

Buster: [speaking of, give her a new updated countdown to uni cos it’s been months since the first]

Rio: It’s so long away

Rio: I’m so sick of not being 18

Buster: When you are you’ll wish you’re 21

Rio: You will, being in the states 

Buster: Yeah

Buster: I’m going with school [whenever he is, because we said that and why not bring it back at whatever point suits us, hence I won’t commit us now to whether it’s before y’all get together or after or for how long he’s going yet either cos again tbd]

Rio: Then you’ll know for sure 

Rio: that’s cool, you’ve got a shorter countdown until that goal

Buster: [give that countdown in days or whatever you’re doing for your unit of measurement, however long away it is]

Rio: Why do you get to go try out being a lawyer and everything I want to do I can’t until I’m an adult

Rio: talk about unfair

Buster: Privilege, [the name of his school] likes to at least pretend they give a shit about my future

Rio: Sure, they can list you in the notable alumni then

Buster: [a list], it’s on their website

Rio: [picking out the only famous in a celebrity way person because it’s usually politicians and other bores] 😍

Buster: Obama and his wife both went to Harvard Law

Rio: There you go, you can meet your Michelle

Buster: As long as she’s an international student as well, I can’t marry an American

Rio: Never live that down

Buster: My standards are too high to live with that accent for the rest of my life

Rio: You’re one to talk

Buster: What’s wrong with the way I talk?

Rio: Wrong is a harsh way to put it

Buster: You implied it

Rio: You’ve heard that craic off grandad forever

Buster: Well yeah, but I like him more than I like you, so I’m willing to let it slide

Rio: How rude

Buster: I am, according to you

Rio: If I say you’re putting it on, you tell me you’re not

Buster: I’ve been putting on a fake accent for ages, if I am

Rio: An accent that goes well with the rudeness

Buster: Precisely, I fit in

Rio: I know

Rio: you’d ensure you did whatever, I don’t blame you

Buster: I know how the game is played

Rio: You’re not stupid

Buster: I don’t lose, never will

Rio: Good

Rio: I think you’d be a sore loser

Buster: What kind of pussy accepts defeat graciously?

Rio: Exactly

Buster: [an anecdote that’s from when they were little like remember when we did such and such and you lost and you were so mad/upset/whichever because he remembers all these moments vividly]

Rio: Your memory is so selective because I remember when [throwing it back at him like remember when you did this because you didn’t win]

Buster: You don’t, that didn’t happen

Rio: Yes it did, we all got into trouble

Buster: [a retelling of this story which is twisted to fit his narrative, like we got in trouble because xyz, blatantly implying it’s her fault cos she made him mad about something, cos always]

Rio: You’ve always been full of it

Buster: You always make me angry

Rio: Everything makes you angry, not just me

Buster: I have self-control when you’re not around

Rio: You just take it out in different ways

Buster: More productive ways, you just like getting me into trouble

Rio: Nonsense, I’m never in trouble

Buster: Because I am instead, the direct comparison makes you look good

Rio: Yeah, it’s all part of my evil plan

Rio: because this family really values being saintly

Buster: Shame it isn’t, you’d be more interesting

Rio: Why would I be trying to interest you

Buster: You can’t help yourself again, babe

Rio: You can’t help being interested

Buster: I don’t deny wishing you were less boring, I just said so

Rio: I know how this works

Buster: Congrats on managing to keep up for once

Rio: There’s nothing more desperate than an attempt to prove otherwise, you can find that entertainment anywhere else

Buster: True, I’m used to your lack of

Rio: You’re not used to my anything

Buster: You wish

Rio: Last I hear, we’re strangers

Buster: Not yet, you keep finding your way back into contact

Rio: You unblocked me, honey

Buster: Nance probably did, she can’t remember her own phone pin to save her life, she’s constantly locked out and has to borrow mine

Rio: You’re making yourself sound so dumb right now

Rio: as if you let her near your phone, please

Buster: Why wouldn’t I?

Rio: Because she famously cannot be trusted

Buster: I don’t have anything to hide, the worst she could do is leak nudes I’m unconcerned if people see

Rio: Then you’re boring, if you really have nothing you’d keep private on your phone

Buster: I’m not ashamed of anything on there, she can’t use what doesn’t upset me against me

Rio: It’s not about upsetting or shame though

Buster: Her motives are

Rio: If you don’t get wanting to have things said between just you and the person you’re talking to then I don’t know what to tell you

Buster: I make my feelings known to whoever I’m talking to

Rio: And your sister, not weird at all

Buster: You’re turning it into something weird with whatever imaginary phone conversations you think I’m having

Rio: You’ve invented this whole fake scenario so you don’t have to admit you unblocked me at some point so 

Buster: I don’t remember unblocking you, there’s hardly a conspiracy

Rio: but Nancy is constantly on your phone and you don’t care if she’s seen your nudes, cool

Buster: If she’s looking at or for them that’s her future therapy bill, I’m not showing her

Rio: Well that’s something

Buster: What secrets do you want me to have?

Rio: I wasn’t hinting at a body or anything sinister

Rio: why are you making it out to be a big thing?

Buster: Why are you hinting that me and Nance have something fucked up going on?

Rio: You can make calls without unlocking your phone, I’m pointing out that you’re not being real

Buster: Who calls anyone? Except granddad on my birthday

Rio: Because you need to do emergency texting when you’re out of it

Rio: you’d just book the uber for her, why bother with this performance

Buster: My parents aren’t blood related, you know, wanting my sister isn’t in my DNA

Rio: Christ, no one said that

Buster: You’re practically saying it right now

Rio: I’m really not

Buster: Don’t

Rio: I say things to people I’m interested in that I’d not risk my siblings reading, that’s it

Buster: And I have face-to-face conversations with girls I’m interested in, allegedly a novel concept to you

Rio: Who doesn’t sext these days?

Buster: I knew your boyfriends were all talk without you needing to point it out

Rio: 🙄 Very mature

Buster: We’ve established you’ve got more of an interest in people than I do

Rio: You’ve already said you think I’ll be a teen mum, which is laughable

Buster: Proving me wrong by not having to raise a kid while you still are will be its own reward, I won’t need to pat you on the back

Rio: I’ve nothing to prove to you

Buster: Don’t then

Rio: I don’t care what you think, you just bullshit anyway

Buster: When?

Rio: I’m not going to sit here and parrot it all back to you, you know you’re not being honest and you know when you’re distorting what could be

Rio: do as you please but don’t expect me to buy it

Buster: I honestly don’t remember unblocking you, you wanting a different truth doesn’t mean I’m lying

Rio: It isn’t about that

Rio: forget it

Buster: What’s it about?

Rio: Yeah, right

Buster: Tell me

Rio: No, Buster

Rio: because you get to deny everything

Buster: Do you seriously want me to admit everything?

Rio: You’re right that there’s no point us talking if it’s going to be like this

Buster: I told you so, here the phrase finally is

Rio: Better late than never

Buster: You’re the one who’s full of it if you genuinely believe things can be different, that there’s another way for us to talk

Rio: You’ve not tried, because then you’d have to admit you were wrong

Buster: You have no fucking idea how hard I’m trying

Rio: You think I’m not?

Buster: You think we can be friends or something

Buster: that’s bullshit

Rio: And you think you can ignore me forever

Buster: If you agreed to do the same, I could

Rio: I’m immature for thinking we could be friends but you pretending none of us exist is the bigger thing to do, why

Buster: Because I can’t control what’ll happen if I don’t

Rio: You can’t control it anyway but you’re obsessed with the illusion

Buster: I have to try

Rio: I can’t stop you

Buster: You shouldn’t want to

Rio: You don’t care what I want, or think, you’ve made it clear

Rio: you don’t get to actually change my mind though

Buster: Back at you, babe

Rio: Don’t come back in March

Rio: limit it to the ones you’re not allowed to miss

Buster: Fine by me

Rio: Great

Buster: [Okay so on the eve of St Paddy’s sometime, catch him coming at his sister]

Buster: I’m staying, don’t go

Nancy: What, why?

Buster: Because we can have our own celebrations

Nancy: You do remember no one does it here

Buster: Exactly, don’t you want to show them all how it’s done?

Nancy: Why don’t you want to go, it’s like your favourite holiday

Buster: Come on, Nance, you have to agree it’s getting boring, the same bullshit year after year

Nancy: I don’t know, it’s not like we’d be doing anything else here on a [whatever random day the 17th has fallen on this year]

Buster: You love throwing a party with a theme

Nancy: Like any of them need an excuse to mock our heritage ever, I’m not throwing a party for them to do it 

Buster: You can mock how [whoever she’s beefing with rn] looks in green

Buster: especially if you make their outfit clash with their skin tone post shots

Nancy: What are you actually up to?

Buster: I could be up to lots of things given the ideal atmosphere

Nancy: Ew, disgusting

Buster: Blame [a girl we’re pretending this is all for the benefit of, even though it absolutely isn’t], I think she should get to know me better, that’s all

Nancy: Why on earth would I want to be around that

Buster: You’ll get to be around [boys he normally doesn’t let her hang around with aka his footie or boxing pals he’s throwing under the bus atm lol] too

Nancy: 🤨

Buster: What now?

Nancy: You’re perfectly aware I don’t trust you, you’re a very untrustworthy person

Buster: So are you, that doesn’t mean we can’t mutually benefit from plans I’m making for my own

Nancy: I’m not interested in your sweaty friends

Buster: Fine, don’t be

Buster: I’ll host by myself

Nancy: Okay, freak

Nancy: make us both a laughing stock in the process because you’re on one

Buster: Says you, what’s your problem?

Nancy: You’re far too keen it’s giving loser energy

Buster: Perhaps I was just trying to appeal to yours

Nancy: HILARIOUS

Nancy: [this girl] is literally a generous 6, you’re going to ruin my social life for that?

Buster: Obviously she isn’t my real target, I’m not stupid enough to tell you which of the friends that she’d bring with her is

Nancy: Bold of you to imagine I’d care

Nancy: the thought of it sickens me

Buster: Very dramatic, are you done yet?

Nancy: If you were banking on us being seen as more reliable together than alone then you’ve obviously suffered a brain injury

Nancy: they’ll either let you alone or they won’t

Buster: I was banking on you organising the party so I didn’t have to

Nancy: No thank you, absolutely no one looks good in green

Buster: An absolute lie

Nancy: It’s not a lie that I’ve done my best to lose any hint of an accent, not for you to spoil it all in a manic episode

Buster: We’ve never had any hint of an accent

Nancy: You’re ignorant to criticism, you always have been

Buster: Stop criticising me then, you’re wasting your breath

Nancy: I don’t want any part in your humiliation

Nancy: but I’ll see who is available to go out, perhaps

Buster: [whatever the drug of choice is at this age at this era, using the kinda silly posh slang he mocked because trying to get her on side] is going to be available, that much organisation I have already done 

Nancy: We both get the same allowance, what makes you think I can’t get my own

Buster: Why wouldn’t you use mine and save yours?

Buster: Don’t be an idiot, flattering shades of green aren’t going to shop for themselves

Nancy: I’ve spent this month’s already 

Buster: That’s a shame, I’d offer to lend you some but you’d only call my mental health further into question

Nancy: You can give me some to look the other way to whatever nonsense you’re pulling that requires you to be in town instead of in Dublin

Buster: Yeah, potentially

Nancy: Do or don’t, girls literally never have to pay, I can get whatever drugs I want from anyone

Buster: You do that, Nance

Nancy: This has been deeply weird and unpleasant

Buster: I just don’t want to go, why can’t you just not be a bitch about it?

Nancy: Have we met?

Buster: Regrettably

Nancy: What’s wrong with you, did you get an A- on a test or something

Buster: I wouldn’t open up to you now if I had

Nancy: Rightly so, do get a grip

Buster: Forget I said anything, use your dyslexic brain fog to someone’s advantage for once

Nancy: I don’t even think that’s a thing

Buster: You’re the expert

Nancy: Not really but they have to give me what I want to not discriminate so worth it

Buster: Enjoy Dublin’s nonsense, I personally can’t wait to hear who else is having a baby next

Nancy: I’ve not decided what I’m doing

Buster: Of course you haven’t

Nancy: And who else would be having a baby?

Nancy: Maybe Tommy and his mrs, if they can

Buster: More to the point, who cares?

Nancy: Grouchy

Nancy: it’s not as if mum and dad will get the bug, way too risky

Buster: You think I’m your humiliating relative having a breakdown, look around when you get to the pub

Nancy: Why are you taking such a stance?

Buster: Why aren’t you?

Nancy: Because I couldn’t care less, it’s fun and entertaining

Nancy: no one’s family here has any interesting problems, it’s all the usual, gambling, affairs, drugs, blah blah blah

Buster: None of it is interesting to me

Nancy: Clearly

Buster: But you’re right, you’re a liability rather than a help

Nancy: Ooh, reverse psychology, very clever 🙄

Nancy: I’m going to do what I want, as are you, there’s no need to collaborate 

Buster: You need a brain to study for those tactics to work

Nancy: You’re in such a mood, oh my GOD

Nancy: is one of the parentals cheating, have you found out?

Buster: I’ll make sure you’re the last to know

Nancy: That’s not fair, they’re my parents too

Buster: Why would I play fair?

Nancy: I know who I’ll live with anyway, I worked that all out yonks ago

Buster: They’d hardly fight over you, you’re the least favourite

Nancy: 💔💔💔💔

Nancy: You’re the one intent on crying, dear brother

Buster: No I’m not, I’ve already made my intentions as clear as possible

Nancy: It’s unfortunate that Ava will insist on being buffeted back and forth but at least we can part ways

Buster: You wish

Nancy: You’d obviously go with mum

Buster: I’d split my time, they both have merits to their parenting

Nancy: 🥱

Buster: Yeah, your Parent Trap fantasy is predictably tedious

Nancy: As is your Gatsby party

Buster: If only [someone we’re shading] would drown in the pool

Nancy: If you’re going to kill someone, please do some homework first, write the manifesto, make it interesting

Nancy: not going to get a Netflix doc for any old run-of-the-mill thing

Buster: I’ve done all my homework

Nancy: Going to have to replace the hot tub but I suppose I’ll survive in the interim 

Buster: The cockroach comparison writes itself

Nancy: Wowwww

Buster: The least you could do is aspire to be a green insect, but alas

Nancy: So bitchy 🐈

Nancy: You’re obviously going to have the damn party regardless of my valid protestations so who fucking cares

Buster: Maybe I fucking care, Nance

Nancy: Why?

Buster: Because you’re my sister, other people give a shit about their siblings, allegedly 

Nancy: Are you already pissed?

Nancy: Lordy, if you want to be this sentimental you can go terrify the child, she’s your sister too

Buster: I know, she acts like it

Nancy: Because she’s 8, she knows no better

Buster: Because she’s better than you, at 8

Nancy: So I’ve been told

Buster: Rightly so

Nancy: How predictable of you

Buster: I wouldn’t waste my time on originality for your sake

Nancy: You would prefer the company of a people-pleasing child, you’ve described your whole circle

Buster: Your circle defying description isn’t the flex you think it is

Nancy: Neither is your plea for being a family, we’re not

Buster: You’re not, because this family doesn’t have the appropriate lineage for you

Nancy: They don’t care about us, they never have, you’re actually delusional if you think they do

Buster: You’re delusional claiming they don’t

Nancy: Get real, Buster, you’re not 8 now

Buster: And you’re not 18 yet, get a grip

Buster: you won’t be able to take care of yourself even when you are

Nancy: When are they ever here, what do they even do

Nancy: We’ve looked after ourselves since we were [whatever ludicrous age you are claiming ‘cos you’ve never been left alone lol]

Buster: Check the calendar

Buster: not to mention your selective memory

Nancy: They’re off on a jaunt so dad can get blackout and you’re actively having a meltdown, they should give a fuck, that’s their jobs, allegedly

Buster: Not wanting to go to Dublin isn’t having a meltdown it’s possessing common sense

Nancy: Whatever you say

Buster: Rio’s been crying to me since before Christmas, constantly telling me how terrible her life is, I’ve had my fill of the misery without needing to catch a flight

Nancy: Oh God, just avoid her

Buster: I blocked her for ages, she still won’t take the hint

Nancy: I’ll talk to her instead, I want to know all the gossip

Buster: Which is the reason she avoids you

Nancy: She doesn’t avoid me

Buster: She hasn’t told you any of it

Nancy: I don’t know, tell me what she’s told you, maybe she has

Buster: She told me she can’t confide in you

Nancy: Really?

Buster: Unsurprisingly, no-one can

Nancy: I don’t know why she would say that, we talk all the time

Buster: Because it’s true, she only talks to you about her boyfriends and her friend drama, yeah? That’s what she said

Nancy: I can’t believe she said that to you, of all people

Buster: She’s desperate to speak to someone who isn’t waiting for their chance to talk and pass the gossip on

Nancy: Ha, WOW

Nancy: well now I definitely want to go

Buster: You’re welcome

Nancy: You’re such a prick for not telling me ‘til now

Buster: You refuse to do me any favours

Nancy: No duh, because you’re such a little rat 

Buster: You’re too preoccupied with your own manufactured drama to notice she can’t stand you, you dropped the ball, Nance

Nancy: She’s just upset about her family drama, lashing out, which is way uncalled for but hey

Buster: She’s upset you’re selfish and untrustworthy, which is ridiculous considering you always have been, but nevertheless

Nancy: How can I be there for her if she’s not telling me the story? How is that MY fault, oh my gosh

Buster: You can’t, she knows that

Nancy: Everyone in this supposed family has such an agenda against me

Buster: I’m not entertaining your victim complex

Nancy: Why would you ever acknowledge the truth when you want to play happy families

Buster: Her opinion’s justified, you’ve proven time and again you can’t be relied on for anything, none of that is anyone’s fault but yours

Nancy: Never mind the fact no one is ever here for me

Nancy: but no, I have to be for all of you and do it perfectly or so help me

Buster: Your selective memory strikes again, I used to be here for you

Nancy: Oh please, your one and only concern is yourself, I don’t know why you’d fake otherwise to the child

Buster: The amount you don’t know is staggering

Nancy: Ha ha

Nancy: just be honest about who you are, I don’t want you to try and be some protective, affectionate brother type, it’s so weird and disingenuous 

Buster: I am being honest, brutally I’ve been told

Nancy: Let’s keep it that way, your business is yours and mine is mine

Buster: Consider it done

Nancy: Toodles

[apilgrimsjournal]

Selfish and Afraid

I am starting to see just how selfish I can be when I want something.

When I was in a relationship, I would want to be with my ex most of the time. Growing up alone with little to no presence of parents or siblings makes having a companion a great thing. Finally, I did not have to feel so alone, right? But it turned out to be disastrous when I made that person into my whole world, that even the most trivial situations would disappoint and upset me. Especially when I could not be with him for reasons that were out of anyone’s control, I would still be selfish, make it a big deal out of it and start a fight. I hated the fact that even the person I expected to always be there for me could not make a way to be with me. But when I became single, I was freed from that worry. I started to realize that singleness is indeed a gift.

However, recently, feelings of longing for someone started to resurface. I am once again agonized by the thought of wishing to always be with someone I admire. Here I was, asking God to answer my prayer for a husband, without thinking that it could unearth the forgotten emotions I buried to my own sanity. I am so afraid that I feel this way again. I am so tempted to run away and escape this predicament. I forgot how love can make me vulnerable and prone to hurt. I know I should not insist my own way but I am just so tired of waiting. Waiting for the right timing seems to never end. If I cannot be with someone right now, why can’t the desire just be gone?

And yet, being in this situation gives me an insight. As flawed and sinful as humans are, You have given us the capacity to love, Lord. We can cherish and sacrifice for each other but the love we can give is not perfect like Yours. So I cannot imagine the pain we give You when we love anything or anyone more than You, Lord.

Help me know how to love like You do, Lord. I do not think I cannot love anyone without You guiding and leading me through it. Take my selfishness and fears away and give me your holiness and love in exchange.