#And hate is definitely one of those things

[lizardho]

I was like 11-12 years old when I figured out at a boring-ass church activity that you could put rocks into little plastic spoons and then pelt people who annoyed me with them. I did this for the rest of the activity, and at Sunday dinner the next night was bragging about my victory (cornering the mean kid who picked on my youngest brother and pelting him with rocks). One of my cousins was like “no way, that sounds SO fun! Let’s do that RIGHT NOW!” So we grabbed spoons and went and got pebbles from the back yard and launched them at each other.

The problem was my grandma sold her soul for the world’s most resilient plastic spoons so we could launch those fuckers HARD. I gave out welts like candy on Halloween, and I got them back in kind.

So we resorted to taking cover and giggling until we got whacked, then yelping, then returning fire.

My cousin hid in my grandpa’s little fishing boat. It was a good boat, but simple and honestly underused. We didn’t know the little windows on it, meant to keep the wind out of my grandpa’s face while he drove, were cracking. However, they were definitely cracking. Eventually it became obvious and we realized we had been being dumb.

This was NOT the first time in my life I’d been dumb roughhousing and broken something, and I had developed a reputation in my family as being “suicidally honest” so I was the one to deliver the bad news. My grandpa let out a pretty good chuckle and said it was OK, tousled my hair, and asked my grandma to bring me cake. I am not kidding. I learned later he hated his boat and only bought it for his kids’ sakes, since he thought everyone needed to know how to fish. At the time though I was just bewildered and pleased at my good fortune. FINALLY, at long last, being honest and telling the truth about breaking something expensive was getting me cake. I knew if I kept trying it would eventually serve me, and now so had CAKE. I was pleased as could be.

My dad, on the other hand, was livid. He LOVED that boat. He spent several weeks each summer recovering from breaking ribs in that boat every year for about 7 years prior to this incident. He had great memories and memories that boat. So he told my Grandma NO cake for me AND that I’d be coming by this weekend to fix stuff around the house and pay for the broken window with my babysitting/lawn mowing money.

Obviously I was devastated, but that felt more in-line with the way things normally went when I broke something expensive so I just figured it was OK. My grandpa gave my grandma a look and sadly said “Ok, have her here on Saturday to help me with some yard work.”

That Saturday my dad woke me up at 6:00 sharp and drove me, sleepy and bewildered, to my grandpa’s house. He was mumbling under his breath the whole time but he thought he was teaching me consequences for my actions so he was ultimately OK with it.

We get to my grandpa’s house at 6:15. My grandpa is outside with a ladder hanging Christmas lights. The lawn is freshly mowed, the trees and garden are weeded and well-tended to, the carnations in the front yard look immaculate, and my grandpa has this giddy mischievous look on his face. He tells me he was so excited that I was coming over that he couldn’t sleep, so he did all the yard work himself. He asked me to help him put up Christmas lights and decorate the Christmas tree, which I did, then said that because I was such a good helper I could have some pancakes for breakfast. I was sent home with the slice of cake I had been denied the week before, wrapped to keep it as fresh as possible.

The whole way home my dad looked a little miffed, but told me that he was glad I had been honest and was proud of me for helping grandpa. I know he wanted me to Learn a Lesson™️the cowboy way, like he had as a kid, but didn’t have much room to complain since I’d still been Put To Work.

I think that was a lesson for both of us, although I’m not totally sure what it was supposed to show me. I think it was my grandpa’s way of showing my dad that discipline without tenderness doesn’t count as much. He died last year and I miss him terribly, as does my dad. I hope that my story of victory, drama, punishment, and ultimately a secret second victory is meaningful to someone else out there, but if not it still means a lot to me ❤️

[la-principessa-nuova]

as a software engineer, i genuinely don't think this is even a thing that is happening, besides a little bit in a technical context but only for the word program

i think that people noticed the abbreviated "app" being used a lot by non-technical people, and got mad at it for existing and felt the need to assert their being a "real computer user" by hating the word

before the iPhone i mostly heard program, and less frequently application and less frequently than that app, but now most people call applications apps, operating systems operating systems (or OSes), scripts scripts, games games, and have never heard of anything that doesn't fall into one of those categories, but may also call software more generally software

occasionally i hear someone refer to a program i wouldn't consider an application as an application, but usually in a context like "the running application", where it's being more technical, but also like what is the line?

at what point does is a program directly useful enough to an end user or big enough in scope or whatever you want to use to separate it to become an application? Does it need a GUI, or is a CLI tool an application? Does it need complexity, or would a program that just lets you enter two numbers and adds them be an application?

my expectation is that people who weren't interested in computer programs suddenly became interested in them, in particular the applications running on their phones, and people who were talking about other kinds of programs just kept calling them what they were calling them, with just some of the people who weren't into tech but had been calling applications programs switching to calling them apps, which was just them getting more specific

this is far from definitive research, but just out of curiosity I checked on the frequency of a few of these terms in google trends, and it kind of lines up exactly with what I'd expect:

app takes off from basically nothing before 2007 to way more than program, application, or operating system, but the other ones don't really go down much

program takes a slight dip, but overall, everyone kept saying what they were saying, plus there was a huge surge in interest in apps

in response to the part "it's part of the general trend of hiding the inner workings of computers from the user, which is something i hate since it tends to promote computer illiteracy which tends to promote incompetence and dysfunction in society as a whole", i would say:

it's part of the general trend of making computing accessible to more people, which necessarily means that a higher percentage of computer users are not particularly interested in computers themselves, and therefore are only interested in the part they interact with: the application

not to enforce gender roles but a computer should NOT fucking have apps okay. if I wanted an app I'd go on my phone my laptop is for Programs. I mean this.

[savanir]

A sister's love

The justice league hurriedly responds to a call for backup at a little in the middle of nowhere place by the name of Amity Park. 

The situation had seemed so simple. 

A Star Sapphire had suddenly shown up on Earth which isn’t immediately cause for concern but she was unidentified, so a lantern was definitely going to have to look into it if only just to make sure that nothing bad was going on. There are two planet side green lanterns, Simon and Jessica. So they responded to handle the potential situation. 

Things rapidly spun out of control when they realized it wasn't just a Star Sapphire. 

"I hate to say this but we're gonna need backup" Simon tells Cyborg, "the Star Sapphire has brought something with her. My first guess was a white martian but..." The other one can do some manner of density shifting, and he can go invisible, but they know ways around that. Whatever this one is doing isn’t that though.

"Why isn't this working!?!" Comes Jessica's slightly panicked voice in the distance, "he keeps just going through my creations! dammit, think think Jess" She tried to contain him with a flamethrower construct but he just ignored it, like he’s seemingly ignoring everything else she’s throwing at him.

"Our constructs have zero effect on the other one, the alien, meta? man I don’t know he’s human shaped" 

"What is the situation other than the two hostiles?"

"Uh we got some government agents who are retreating because of the Star Sapphire wrecking their stuff. And the civilian people here seem to be falling under her influence, so she must be human. She's from here, she needs emotional connection to pull that stuff off."

The people are furious, the violet glow around them clearly indicates that the girl is using her ring to amp them up but if Simon didn’t know any better he’d say this was red lantern stuff.

Well there are more ways to whip people up into a frenzy, by hurting their loved ones for example.

There is a brief moment where it can be heard that Simon and Jessica try to get into a more advantageous position. 

Simon grunts, "dammit, those agents seemed to have weapons that actually worked on the other guy but the Star Sapphire used her violet constructs to shield him and destroy their guns and we've been struggling since" this whole situation stinks, he has a weird feeling about all of it.

"Simon this is really really bad, i can't keep restraining all these civilians, we're running out of energy fast!"

Cyborg tries to get a visual on the situation from his position in the Watchtower while he’s notifying any league affiliated heroes who are nearby and available. 

But all of a sudden he realizes there is just nothing, just a big lap of void where the two lanterns are supposed to be, there is no cctv footage, no cell towers, no internet connection. Just what the hell is going on here.

Then the audio transmission starts to violently crackle.

A new voice laced with static can suddenly be heard, "There you two are"

"Shit"

"Is the justice league coming yet? Are they finally going to do something?" the staticy voice continues.

"Stay back you-"

"Or maybe they still need more of a reason to act" 

The audio cuts out. 

"Jessica! Simon! Come in!" ... "Shit!" 

Cyborg finally gets a clear picture with the satellite cameras and now sees the entirety of Amity Park has been covered with a crystalized violet dome. It’s then that he remembers the story Hal told quite some time ago now about a Star Sapphire who managed to put a whole planet into love stasis.

They are gonna need more help with this one he thinks.

Meanwhile Jazz is still shakily trying to figure out how her new pink powers work, now that all the fighting is over (for now), the GIW forcefully expelled from Amity, and the two Justice league people captured and restrained.

Everything happened so fast, one moment the GIW had knocked out her brother and were forcefully taking him away and while she saw them drive off (she was pretty sure she was screaming) a pink thing just froze her in place, She was pretty sure someone said something about “great love in her heart” and then she was… well she was flying and- and there wasn’t really any time to question things then so she may have kinda gone and ripped into the van that had Danny.

She’s pretty sure she healed him, and then things just completely spiraled out of control from that point on. and now she’s here.

She’s pretty sure this is crazy villain behavior, she’s going to get put on some sort of watchlist and then she’ll never get to be a psychologist but it’s fine.

Her little brother is safe, that’s all that matters. And she will keep it that way.

[nam-the-nacho]

Mit2uba's Trauma: An Analogy

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Tw: I will be discussing the abuse Mitsuba has suffered from his environment, nothing that isn't in the manga, but I want to give a heads up. Additionally, I'm fortunate to have not gone though any severe traumatic experience myself, and am instead using my general knowledge, meaning if anything is incorrect here, please point it out!

(Also manga spoilers obviously)

I'm not pretending this hasn't ever been discussed, however I have yet to see an analogy of the consequences of Mitsuba's creation and (practically nonexistent) upbringing.

I'm going to divide this post into sections, but they won't really be organized, maybe chapters is a better definition. This thing is l o n g, so without further ado:

1: Mitsuba being paralleled to a puppet:

This is done quite often, although not in the same ways. Besides the psychological aspects of being Tsukasa's "puppet", as in being forced to do as he says and overall being under his control, but there are physical correlations too.

Tsukasa referring to Mitsuba as a "Thing"

Mitsuba lets Tsukasa hold him. This is much more then a surface-level fact considering Mitsuba usually rejects contact/uses it as an excuse to blame others. This is easily explained by "Mitsuba is simply scared of Tsukasa, he can't tell him no", except Mitsuba doesn't look scared when being held, he just looks, expressionless.

More then that, he completely trusts Tsukasa with his body weight, leaning into his touch and allowing himself to be comforted by it. This obviously occasionally backfires horribly

While Mitsuba being punched is framed in a humorous manner, the implications and weight of it are very heavy. It's all fun and games until you remember this is how Mitsuba is being raised, and it's all he's ever known. If Mitsuba doesn't want to do what Tsukasa tells him too, he gets punched. If he talks back, he gets kicked out of the broadcasting room (we'll get back to this later). If he asks to be Tsukasa's friend, he gets fireworks shoved down his mouth.

And the results of this... well:

This one in particular is interesting to me:

"It's just Mitsuba being surprised because Kou suddenly raised his voice". But that's not what's being illustrated. Upon hearing "brace yourself" even from someone like Kou, who wasn't planning on actively trying to hurt Mitsuba, he literally stiffens, pales, and begins to tremble and sweat, dropping the piece of chalk he was holding (those things break way to easily, yk he was serious). It's not shock or surprise being drawn, it's just genuine fear.

This could very well be me overthinking, but Mitsuba falls in what is almost a doll-like manner, arms and legs completely stiff.

2: Social rejection and trivial treatment:

The Mitsuba chapter (ch. 40) was worse then I remembered.

Mitsuba runs away from the broadcasting room in search of a better, safer place to stay. Only to understand he has none.

What's worse is that these are the characters we see being far kinder to the rest of the cast. We see Yako, Hanako and weirdo super-natural teacher together in his living quarters, watching tv together, but when Mitsuba approaches them...

(Tsuchigomori eventually does stay with him, but his opinion of him doesn't really change.)

"This guy's a pain, I'm out of here"

Tsuchigomori doesn't know Mitsuba, the only time we see them meet was when Tsuchigomori refers to him as emergency rations (above), and when he answered Mitsuba who asked him a question (answer starting with "You seriously don't know?" (YES SIR HOW WOULD HE KNOW HE'S LIKE ONE MONTH OLD)).

He probably heard he's a prankster from Hanako, which is why he wants nothing to do with him.

The point is despite Mitsuba needing to run from the closest thing he considers a "home", not a single supernatural actually understands his situation. Hanako borderline hates him, Nene barley understands he's a different Mitsuba, and Kou tends to accidently frame it as Mitsuba's CHOICE to stay with Tsukasa in the broadcasting room.

This is sadly something that can happen in reality, children trying to escape their less-desirable homes can often find themselves, sickeningly, returning after not finding somewhere or someone to take them seriously.

The most deranged part of this is that as a result of nobody properly digesting that he needs help, Mitsuba himself frequently convinces himself that everything is normal.

The implication that every time Mitsuba fights with Tsukasa he needs to just fend for himself until enough time has passed for Tsukasa to forget is sad. He's an outcast between the wonders for replacing the old No.3, despite his only other choice being death, which they don't know.

Sakura is probably the closest thing Mitsuba has to family, being in a similar situation to him, but it's incorrect to say she truly deeply cares about him. She's fond of Mitsuba, but never goes out of her way to help him when Tsukasa hurts him, and seems to have put her personal safety and goals as a higher priority then him (this isn't Sakura slander, I love my queen).

Natsuhiko treats him like a pet more then a human, and sometimes hits on him, which is just gross. Despite this Mitsuba genuinely appreciates him and sees him as an older brother. It's cruel to see this one-sided ordeal.

We don't actually know Mitsuba's true opinion of Tsukasa. In an almost realistic manner, his opinion is constantly contradictory. Mitsuba is scared of Tsukasa, but at the same time he only feels 'safe' when he's around.

Also, contrary to Sousuke, Mitsuba is more scared of Tsukasa then thunder, which could either mean that Sousuke's phobia of thunder was memory-correlated, or that Mitsuba is SO scared of Tsukasa that thunder is nothing in comparison.

Mitsuba freezing after hearing Tsukasa's voice

vs:

We know Mitsuba is aware that Tsukasa is not treating him okay, but by the time we learn this (pp arc), Mitsuba has half convinced himself that Tsukasa is doing everything he's doing to help him, and that "nobody else can help him anyways". Genuinely Mitsuba is one of the most subtle-yet-obvious victims portrayed in media I've even seen.

3: Ok-yeah-that's-not-okay moments

Do I really need to add anything.

I will anyways. Mitsuba is a dramatic by nature, unrelated to any of the emotional damage he's suffered. The fact that Tsukasa can make him stop crying just by demanding it really shows how bad he messed up Mitsuba. The ability to stop crying on command out of fear..... somebody save him.

Stay away!

Can't add to many pictures because of the tumbler limitations, but in every one of these scenes Mitsuba totally freezes, only regaining control and suddenly snapping once someone (aka Kou) does anything intimidating to him.

Going in-depth about the similarities between Kou and Tsukasa is an entirely different ordeal, but in short summery:

There's a carefully built connection between Tsukasa and Kou, that deserves a post of it's own.

4: Symptoms of trauma:

Trust issues are heavily associated with a problematic childhood, so it's not very surprising that Mitsuba struggles to trust anyone besides Tsukasa, even if he doesn't want to.

Very commonly appearing alongside trauma, self destructive behaviors are a tragically common coping habit. I don't think I need to add any pictures for this one, as practically every other sentence Mitsuba says have some 'Just let me pass away' coding to it.

Lack of memories is a symptom that appears in very severe cases, and while it isn't completely accurate to Mitsuba it's an interesting addition considering Mitsuba has no memories.

5: Character design:

Mitsuba has lots of chains and locks in his wonder form, a lock on his neck (which has multiple interpretations), one preventing his heart from beating, which could be a clever metaphor for Mitsuba further constricting his humanity by "choosing" to become a wonder, but most interesting:

What looks to be the remains of a leg shackle.

Mitsuba in a box labeled as fragile.

6: This definitely isn't a metaphor for an eating disorder:

"I'm always hungry, no matter how much I eat" -M

"You starved yourself from all this moping around, just because you didn't want to eat something different?" -K

Can we talk about how the fandom collectively just skipped over the huge reveal that Mitsuba STARVES HIMSELF. Because I feel like that really wasn't talked about. As if this guy doesn't have enough going on, he now has to deal with constant starvation, dehumanization at new never-seen-before-pace, and the loss of his will to exist in the first place.

He is both metaphorically and physically falling apart, constantly in physical pain. When he isn't in physical pain it's because he's experiencing gut-wrenching psychological torment as he can't stop eating live beings. I don't blame this guy.

The only person who knew of this was Tsukasa, until he "told" Kou. Told is in quotation marks because it was never really Mitsuba trusting Kou enough to open up about the hell he's enduring, as mentioned before Mitsuba doesn't exactly know how to trust. The fact was forced out of him due to a dire situation, but Kou could not have reacted in a worse way:

Pro tip: If your reaction to learning that your best buddy is suffering from a complicated relationship with food, is shoving said food into their mouth violently, you might need therapy just as much as they do.

Kou is still unaware that Mitsuba's diet contains living things too, but if we're being honest that doesn't really put Kou in the right here. Like, man, I know you're freaking out because your friend just asked you to end him, but please take out your anger on something that isn't him.

And don't act surprised when this is his reaction:

This is arguably the a result of post traumatic stress disorder. Mitsuba didn't just escape, he hid in the nearest corner, making himself as small as possible, hid his head and trembled. The reason I'm calling this out as PTSD is because the only other time he panicked like this was right after Tsukasa shoved the bird heart down his throat.

So for both situations it's:

Tsukasa force feeds Mitsuba -> Mitsuba loses control (starts attacking everything)

Kou force feeds Mitsuba -> Mitsuba bites Kou

And the results are the same. He reacted the same way because mentally it was the same situation to him, It doesn't matter what the intentions were, Kou triggered an event(s (considering he's eaten multiple supernatural and is absolutely repulsed by it)) that Mitsuba had no intention of revisiting.

Summery:

Mitsuba's trauma is often overshadowed by more obvious displays of mental scarring, like with the Yugi twins and Kou, and is often represented with irony or humor, including by the creators themselves.

Even without everything he's gone though, Mitsuba was always a hopeless character. He just existed one day. He doesn't have anything, anyone. He's never been told he's loved, he's never felt sunlight, he never got to play, he's never had anyone tuck him into bed, or read him a story. He was robbed of his childhood, and any connections besides the few who remember him for someone that he isn't.

He doesn't even know what snow is, yet he knows how blood tastes like

This entire post wasn't even scratching the tip of the iceberg in terms of how much grave emotional turmoil Mitsuba has faced. And will face. Yeah I don't know how well his trust issues will cope with Natsuhiko leaving him to die. If he lives.

The idea of this long rant was to point out that Mitsuba's trauma and mental struggles are just as, if not more, relevant then his physical ones. And they do affect him, and they do have consequences. And they will most certainly come back 20x worse later on in the plot. I would say to prepare mentally, but I know tbhk fans can handle just about anything.

Thank you for reading!

ヾ(≧▽≦*)

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[lucygraysboy]

“thank you, lucy gray. if anyone can help me out here, it’s definitely you.” it means the world to him to know that she’s not only letting him try and get close to joe again, but also offers to facilitate that process. he knows just how protective she can be over the people who are dear to her and appreciates the trust that she’s putting in him. “oh, you so are. you barely had two drinks and it was game over. also, not to embarrass you, but i didn’t know you were so handsy while drunk,” he continues to tease, wondering if she’ll smack or pinch him eventually. that would be just like the good ole days. “please, great mind think alike.” it’s yet another thing that he missed terribly. this connection. the ability to read each other’s minds. soulmate telepathy. “manuela will be so happy when i tell her ‘bout your mom’s quilts, i just know it. she hates big corporations and fast fashion and all that stuff.” she’s one of those people who actually shop very responsibly and always tries to support small businesses and cruelty-free, organic brands. billy’s certain she’ll fall in love with the handmade quilts, and with lucy gray, too.

“well, i’m not sure if i’m worthy of such honor, but let me think on it… if the mom’s name is moon, she needs something matching. star? aurora? polaris? give me some more time and i’ll come up with somethin’ good,” he promises, taking his job very seriously because he knows how special naming a new life is. “are you serious right now?” he chuckles, his pinky finger brushing against her own once they’re on the sidewalk, hesitating before curling around it and gently pulling her toward the entrance. the steakhouse is located on the 34th floor of the marriott hotel, offering 360-degree views of the nashville skyline, and the food’s supposed to be top notch as well. which is one of the reasons why billy picked this place. “so, you will nurse wild mustangs back to health but ridin’ a motorcycle is too dangerous? have some faith in me.” maybe she’ll warm up to the idea eventually. “i’ll make that happen.” both those things, of course. having her on set will be so exciting. “you’re very welcome, bambi doll.” 

“i’ll talk to him.” even though she already reassured that, she still will make an effort to do so once she’s back home. knowing it won’t be easy but she will do whatever it takes to see a brotherly bond re-established as long as billy doesn’t abandon them both, since it’s not like she entirely trusts him. “who, me? i ain’t.” the songstress fibs, amusingly smiling as she looks out the window not wanting to admit to it. hiding her smile this way. “oh, i was just gettin’ ready to tell you that!” it excites her because he basically just read her mind, “she’s made a lot of nursery quilts. so, yeah, you definitely can.” let manuela know, she means. “we’re still decidin’. maybe you should help name her.” the brunette suggests, then frowns because she doubts a helmet is enough to stay safe on a motorcycle. of all things he went and did— he of course had to go get one of those contraptions. “i’m not sure i will.” take him up on that offer, she means as she gently smiles to not be rude. “well, i’d love to. and i’d love to come and visit the set.” that genuinely sounds so exciting, she hopes they can do it soon even. looking out the window once they come to a stop, she grabs her backpack and steps out when the door comes open for her. “thank you, darlin’.” lucy gray chirps, smiling gratefully as she looks up at him then steps to the side to let him lead the way.

[thepointofme]

modern cherik au where they both are super famous actors, charles is the nation's sweetheart with his big blue eyes and charming personality who steals people's hearts in rom coms and erik is the tall dark and handsome actor who goes for more dramatic/serious roles. they allegedly have no connection with each other whatsoever until one day a few photos are leaked and the world finds out they used to be together when they were younger and the internet goes wild bc wdym charles xavier and erik lehnsherr were a couple???? they're completely opposite!!!! there's not any public statement about it but after that from time to time they're seen together in the same place or side by side walking or drinking or laughing (everybody is SHOCKED to see grumpy erik lehnsherr scrunching his nose with the biggest smile on his face as he laughs with charles or the fond look he gives charles with an expression so soft is almost painful to see) they'd definitely be those types of couples who are on and off because divorce follows them in every universe so people would never really know if they're still together or not bc both of them are very private about their personal life (especially erik, no one knows shit about his life outside of his roles and the few things he shared before), but lets say they're not together anymore and then one day its announced they're going to work together for the first time in a mini series as the main characters and as a couple and people officially lose it all!! give me something dark and sensual where they can explore their talent in acting and their chemistry and im talking about 'kerry washington and tony goldwyn in scandal' levels of chemistry like people would CHOKE with the tension. lots and lots of eye contact and kisses and sex scenes who look way too real to be fake. and i know we could have the 'lets pretend we're a couple again' to promote the show but i want something more interesting, instead they do the opposite and make it CLEAR how they're NOT together at any chance they get. could you imagine how funny it would be to have charles and erik being SOOOOO passive aggressive to each other in interviews, talking about how it was a torture to work together because the other is annoying in a playful tone, the constant bickering, and at the same time complimenting each other's strengths, because they've known each other for so long they know how to navigate around each other even when their relationship is not in "good terms" so no one really knows if they actually hate each other or if they're fucking or if they're couple or all the options above. give me something MESSY!!!!!!! twitter would go crazy with fan theories!!!!! and then after the show ends they'd disappear and come back months later married.

[th3-c0ll3ct3r]

Mildly warm take, Tommy does NOT owe his entire career to Dream

Because, YES the dream smp help propel his career as a content creator, but it does not constitute to everything you've done to make himself and his brand better

Did dream write all the jokes? The vlogs? The books? The MCC wins? The friendship formed before and after? The smp's to follow later? Origins? The comedy? Twitch con?

Because if you say That Dream did all of that for Tommy then I'm going to assume Dream Is Crawling into his skin and piloting his body

Saying dream owns Tommy's as well as other people's careers, is like saying that if I were to bake a cake it wouldn't be my cake it would be the person who made the ingredients. I still baked the cake, put the ingredients together, bought them, got the recipe and just because I didn't grow the wheat or milk the cow it doesn't make it not my cake.

The smp did objectively help his career there is no fault in that and even Tommy acknowledges it, but you can't attribute every single thing that he does now to Dream.

And you can also argue that dream was a bad person, because he was. Regardless of allegations and other people's experiences, dream intentionally seeked out a 14 year old streamer, made him sign a legal contract, took every single bit of credit, got into fights with him on a regular basis, a made him feel so bad you will slamming his head against the desk.

That's not normal. None of that's normal.

And then in an alternative perspective dream didn't do us much for the smp as he claims. The only things he did was bring the content creators together, start the server, and play as his own character.

I do not get me wrong there is credit in that and he did do those things that allow the server to operate, but those with the only things he did.

Wilbur (as much as we hate him) wrote the scripts, and alot of Tommy lore. Will stopped writing the Script after he died canonically, and then later came back because in his own words " lI had to write myself back into the narrative [...] I didn't like where it was going. Not to see dream is a bad writer, but we had different ideas". That's him putting it nicely, the worst bit for the smp realistically was when dream was writing the lore.

And I'm not saying that it was bad but what I am saying is that the majority of people found it bad, so bad in fact that they had to bring Will back.

Dream did not write his own story.

And to the other content creators, on the server they will their own lore. And they acted it out themselves, dream was no part of that yet they still had to sign contracts because it was still on the physical server.

Ranboo and Technoblade in particular had some of the best story writing and telling, and they did it all themselves.

But there's only one thing in common, that makes sense but I think we all missed, dream was in every single person story or had planned to be. And I get it it's his server but on the other hand they could have had amazing stories without his input. Ranboo could have replaced Dream with a mysterious unknown character in his lore, and the outcome and affect would have been the same story-wise. Dream didn't need to be Puffy's son, but he was. Technoblade and Philza could have skip to the side plot of saving dream and instead it needed to return a favour to someone else.

The storytelling within the server is a amazing but if you subtract dream and put someone in his place it's still would have been the same story. It's like he was made to be sandwich in everyone's story. And yes he was a great character in most stories, but in others he was unnecessary.

Put with the overall fact that he had to be in every single story obviously ties back to the server being his, but it's also a reflection of his own ego. He probably still to this day believe that every single person has a career because of him and do not because of who they are now. He definitely helped but it's not all him.

And I would say George, Sapnap and Dream, have the same issue with ego. You see the way dream behaves with over people, he dominated people's careers for many years and had it done by fear.

Sapnap, he would swear and curse every single person, to the point where Scott said he was the most difficult person to put on a team because no one wanted to play with him (I have a different post about MCC). There were many offensive and situations in which the pair of them actually ruin the game for a lot of people. If you were not a person who watched MCC back in the day then I can tell you from now they had to change so many rules, Scott had to start making applications because of the amount of times that they would bail or not communicate with him or simply people didn't want to play with him and wanted to avoid him, and due to their obsessive behaviour in needing to the practice the maps so much that when the game was chosen some people didn't even try because they knew who would win.

They're talented don't get me wrong but there is an extent in which that their Talent crosses with ego and makes the whole game unplayable. This is without mentioning the amount of people who were scared to play with this team or against this team. No one had a fun.

And even in the smp, some people purposely avoided Sapnap, because he didn't know how to manage himself.

And George you could argue also has a large ego because of the people he surrounds himself by and he's a success. He is an objectively/ conventionally attractive male, and there have been many instances including in recent times and in certain develop it situations that he used it to his advantage. He doesn't behave his age and he treats people cruelly.

And most importantly, the fans. Yes YOU. You heavily contributed to the success of the server and to the success of the creators. But the level of obsession people would have regarding these content creators is something that will always baffle me.

And alot of people asked them to speak out, especially Dream. And he didn't. Dream actually encouraged his audience by selling sketchy merchandise and a USB stick with his baby pictures on it. He enables his radical audience because they are what keeps him going. Realistically without the radical side of his audience he would not be as successful and financially well off as he is now.

Additionally those people attack literally anyone that set something bad about him, and at first he tried to downplay it, then he assured people he would manage it and tell them to start, but then along the way he must have realized that these people a Ride or Die for him and that if he drives away these people he drives away a lot of money, free advertisement and a defense system against his brand- and I say this because these people would defend him in any circumstance

So then he doesn't stop them, and now you've got a 19-20s yr old with an unfortunate amount of mental health issues, some people who continue to jab him with needles anytime he's upset.

And it's sad. Is far beyond something that his parents can protect him from, yet he hasn't found the resources to protect himself. He's not happy with himself. He used to be scared to stand with someone successful even though he's successful.

And I'm genuinely proud of how much Tommy has grown. He is and continues to be a dedicated, passionate and nice person regardless of circumstances, he continues to be real with his audience and tries not to waste thier time. And none of that was taught to him by Dream. He taught himself how to be himself. If I see one person saying that he's a clout chaser I'm gonna have to tell you that you're wrong because he's done so much for himself to the point where you can't even count it yet you can count the things dream did for him on a Post-it note.

Tommy did well

[njm63522]

Sevika fluff alphabet

word count: 2027

________________________________________

A ctivities - What do they like to do with their s/o? How do they spend their free time with them?

- personally, I think she'd often indulge in taking you to the last drop. She often has you propped up on her lap while she laughes at the men gambling away their life savings (she likes to call you her lucky charm)

- honestly, she'd be willing to take you anywhere though. Just as long as everyone knows you're hers. She'll keep a hand in your back pocket as you guys walk around the city and she'll give nasty looks to whatever man decides to even glance your way.

B eauty - What do they admire about their s/o? What do they think is beautiful about them?

- SHE LOVES YOUUUUU omg.

-she literally admires every part of your body. She would rather choke and die then have to pick a favorite.

- and she LOVESS to pick you up. You think you're too heavy? Don't flatter yourself. Not for her you're not.

C omfort - How would they help their s/o when they feel down/have a panic attack etc.?

- I Hate to be that guy, but I don't think she would be the best at comforting. With words atleast.

-she'll probably give you a nice hug or a pat on the back. But if you start crying, she'll literally freeze and give you an awkward "you alright..?"

-it's not that she doesn't care, she's just bad at showing how much she does care.

D reams - How do they picture their future with their s/o?

- living in a place like Zaun, where the future is so unpredictable and anyone could die at any moment. She just wants keep things in the present and not think about the future.

-If it were up to her, she would take you far away from all they chaos and just grow old together

-but that may never happen. so for now, she just wants to see you alive in the future.

E qual - Are they the dominant one in the relationship, or rather passive?

- she's definitely more on the dominant side, she's the one wrapping a hand around your waist in public and mean mugging everyone who dares look at you the wrong way

F ight - Would they be easy to forgive their s/o? How are they fighting?

-if you guys end up fighting, it'd most likely be about her work

-weather it's how long she's gone during the day, or how she always comes back with curs and bruises. You guys always find a way back to eachother

If you're the one who apologizes:

She gives you a stupid ass grin, she knew she was right. She definitely wouldn't rub it in your face or anything. But she will be a bit smug about it

If she's the one to apologize:

-She'll be extremely sheepish, it's almost laughable how she's reduced to a stuttering mess when she's the one apologizing.

-I really dont think she'd be the best with words, so she'd just trap you in a tight hug and mutter an apology into your ear.

-if you don't accept her apology— worse, reject her hug. She'll be so confused and lost, giving you big ol' puppy eyes while she uses her words to express how sorry she is.

G ratitude - How grateful are they in general? Are they aware of what their s/o is doing for them?

-once again, SHE LOVES YOUUUU

-i don't think there's enough words to explain how happy she is to have you.

-sometimes, when the sun is just beginning to rise and she's dreading the long workday ahead of her. shell spend just a little while longer in bed admiring your sleeping frame. shed never admit it, but on mornings like those, she thanks her lucky stars to have you sleeping next to her.

-she was never a religious person, but she thanks god that she has you next to her every night.

H onesty - Do they have secrets they hide from their s/o? Or do they share everything?

-she wouldn't hide anything from you, she believes that the only way to have a good relationship is to be fully open and transparent, even if that leads to you a tad bit oversharing.

-there are some details she may not be able to share because of her work. but 9/10 times, shell tell you anyways because she loves you or whatever

I nspiration - Did their s/o change them somehow, or the other way around? Like trying out new things or helped them overcome personal problems?

-she would NEVER admit it, but you changed her for the better.

-she's definitely gotten soft ever since you guys started dating. getting in less fights with strangers, going out to gamble less.

-just overall spending more time with you, and not in the chaos of Zaun.

J ealousy - Do they get jealous easily? How do they deal with it?

-she gets jealous so easily omg. she wont even hesitate to beat up strangers on the street just for looking at you the wrong way.

-god forbid a man tries to FLIRT with you?

-youd have to ask her to stop before she literally killed the poor guy.

-ever since that incident, everyone at the bar knows to stay far away from you.

K iss - Are they a good kisser?

-shes definitely an experienced kisser. she's been with many women before getting with the love of her life (you)

-her kisses are rough, almost always leaving you breathless and desprate for more.

-shell tangle one hand in your hair, and use the other one to pull you closer by the waist URGG

L ove Confession - How would they confess to their s/o?

-like i said previously, she's not the best with her words, so shed probably just approach you in the bar after watching (and lokwey stalking) you for a few months and say something like "you and me, this Friday. 5 pm. don't be late" before walking away.

-you'd show up and find her sitting alone at a table with a messy bouquet of flowers in her hand (she picked them herself)

-shed give you the flowers and spend the rest of the night trying to make conversation with a deep blush on her face. (she's such a cutie oml)

M arriage - Do they want to get married? How do they propose? What would the marriage be like?

-this ones a bit complicated...

-shed love to take you away from that city and propose to you in a gorgeous flower field that goes on for miles.

-but something like that isn't achievable in the current state of the world

-so instead, she stares at you from across the room, dreaming about giving you everything you deserve.

N icknames - What do they call their s/o?

-her lucky charm (like i said before)

-baby

-i don't think shell use a lot of nicknames.. once again, not good with words.

O n Cloud Nine - What are they like when they are in love? Is it obvious for others? How do they express their feelings?

-im telling you right now

-she literally looks like she wants to murder you when shes crushing on you.

-remember when i mentioned her watching you from across the bar? yeah, you spent that time thinking she hated you because of the way she stared at you.

-you literally thought she was going to assault you when she came up to ask you out.

P DA - Are they upfront about their relationship? Do they brag with their s/o in front of others? Or are they rather shy to kiss etc. when others are watching?

-be prepared to have her constantly brag about you.

-if youre not sitting on her, youre sitting directly next to her with her arm around you.

-shes weird in a way that she wont tell you directly how much she loves you, but she wont shut up about it to everyone else.

Q uirk - Some random ability they have that’s beneficial in a relationship.

-this isnt really an ability, just more of a thing she does

-but i think shed be willing to eat ANYTHING

-its amazing the stuff her stomach can handle.

R omance - How romantic are they? What would they do to make their s/o happy? Cliché or rather creative?

-she loves to make you happy, but shes so SO nervous.

-she would show up to your house at 2 am with a boquet of flowers in her hand and ask if you want to hang out with her.

-shed take you shopping in topside and if you even look at something twice, shell buy it for you.

-shes lowkey useless when it comes to buying clothes because she thinks everything looks so pretty on you

"should i get the red, or the white one?"

"get both"

"but which one looks better?"

"... both?"

-shes so useless, but shes trying her best.

S upport - Are they helping their s/o achieve their goals? Do they believe in them?

-i feel like it depends on what kind of goal it is, if its something unrealistic, she would try to gently coax you into something more achievable because shed hate to see you get hurt.

T hrill - Do they need to try out new things to spice out your relationship? Or do they prefer a certain routine?

-in the chaos that is her life. you're the only thing that can remain the same. so I think shed prefer to keep routine with you. however, she wouldn't be mad if things changed from time to time, she's happy if you're happy.

U nderstanding - How good do they know their partner? Are they empathetic?

-she knows you so well. everything you've mentioned or talked about. even in passing. she's taken a mental note of.

-you could breifly mention how youre into a peice of jewerly or an article of clothing.

-and you'd find it on your bed, tied up with a little bow the next day.

-she wouldn't bring up the gift unless you say something first though, she's js nonchalant like that

V alue - How important is the relationship to them? What is it’s worth in comparison to other things in their life?

-this woman would lay down her life for you.

-she loves you SOOOOO much

-there's not much more i can say, you're the beginning and end of her life

-and she loves you

W ild Card - A random Fluff Headcanon.

hear me out. (slight s2 spoilers)

-no matter how much she pretends to hate jinx, shed bring up adopting her and isha.

-it might sound ridiculous, but shed love to be a mother one day and she basically raised jinx so why not?

-she tried to brush away the idea from her mind

-but the moment she sees you placing bowls of soup Infront of the kids (jinx and isha) reminding them to wait for it to cool down

-she finds herself thinking that she could get used to this.

X OXO - Are they very affectionate? Do they love to kiss and cuddle?

-shes such a cuddlebig omg

-the moment you guys start cuddling, she wont let go for HOURSSS

-sometimes, shell randomly lay on top of you, full starfish, and fall asleep.

-you have to accept your fate, i fear.

Y earning - How will they cope when they’re missing their partner?

-long answer short?

-she doesnt.

-whenever she leaves for a long time, shell bring a shirt of yours just to smell it and remember it.

-it lowkey sounds creepy, but shes so lonely without you :(

the very moment she gets back, shell pratically jump on you and attack you with cuddles and kisses

-did i mention she loves you?

Z eal - Are they willing to go to great lengths for the relationship? If so, what kind of?

-SHELL DO ANYTHING FOR YOUUUU

-she loves you (can you tell i ran out of ideas?)

__________________________________

i finished this in one sitting, im so proud :3

requests open

[circuseyesofgod-if]

How would the Ro's react if MC decides to break up with them?

Aaand how would they handle being cheated on? (I hate infidelity 😤)

Pharo would not take either of those things well at all! if you get him to commit, he's very possessive and territorial. he would adorn MC in jewels from head to toe to get them back, would genuinely get them whatever they want, sugar daddy style. if MC cheated on him though, he would quite literally find the person MC cheated with and bind them to the Circus, so that he can very cruelly boss them around. may or may not accidentally stab them during a knife throwing performance.

Odessa would definitely try and seem nonchalant when MC breaks up with her, and then stalk them constantly, leaving little trinkets of hers around for MC to see so that they'll know they'll never truly be alone again. the cheating part ... yeah, MC may or may not get poisoned, sorry not sorry.

Vesper would actually cry its eyes out in both situations, poor thing. even when it got transformed it wasn't as painful as MC breaking up or cheating on it. it would claw at its tank trying to get out, because every space would be too suffocating without MC there. without its tank, Vesper would die, and it would be willing to do that just for MC to look at it one more time.

[mailontumb]

HC for the LSSMP!☆ﾟ⁠.⁠*⁠･⁠｡ﾟ

Spoke and Minute are definitely siblings or half siblings

Bacon and Planet likes to kidnap their friends to surprise them for their surprise birthday party

Rek met Branzy during Childhood and is really close friends and never once lied or try to keep things away from each other

Clown and Kab ARE DEFINITELY SIBLINGS. LIKE HOW ARE THEY NOT (it could be like half or step siblings)

Zam is the Dance king

Pangi likes hanging out with Zam cus he is the only one who understands him

Derapchu takes pictures of everyone's feet and sells it to the internet

Jumper is half Bunny

Squiddo learned how to glitch after asking ash to teach her

Ash secretly has a picture of people he likes in his Glitch Room

Red HATES tomatoes as everyone compared him to one

The reason Chief is grey is because he Might've painted himself grey or just have stone genetics

Although Mid has multiple of the exact same hoodie but she is a MASTER designer

Clown kidnapped Branzy for their first date

Oh and Kab often comes to Clowns date cus their mom said so

Flame found Mane terrorizing people and thought "I relate to bro" and became bestie ever since

Parrot can communicate with any bird but Owl cus it scares him

EVERYONE but rek HAS SLEEP PARALYSIS DEMONS

Rek doesn't have SPD cus he over thinks that his base is trapped and the Monster felt really bad haunting him

Oh yea The SPD is worse on Derapchu cus he once took a picture of the Demon's feet and it got really offended

Hanna knows EVERYONE's Secrets (she was the first person who knows about Clownzy after accidentally trying to gamble at the casino)

Cookie God is the LSSMP God too but he barely takes care of the place cus he trusts the listener to take care of it

Rek sprays people with water if they cuss in his video

1 time Vortex challenge Vitalasy and Jeppexx to a Lemon eating competition, Vitalasy won at 150 lemons in 30 minutes

Vortext is often offline but when he is online every makes it a celebration

The LSSMP have their own birthday but Ro doesn't as he was an escaped Watcher

Watchers Can't interact with LSSMP only the listeners can, so that makes LSSMP a safe haven for all those who are running away from the watchers

Hanna ran away from the Watchers 5 TIMES with each attempts getting harder and harder

Only 5 people knows about the situation of LSSMP that being G,P,M,Ro and Hanna, 3 of which tried to escape &only 2 made it the other one was returned back to the watchers and was punished

Mr cube can do a double backflip and likes tea parties!

4cvit is the reason why child labor exists

Someone mistaken SB for a penguin and called animal control,which they grabbed him and sent him back to the icy pole, parrot came and took him back

Leo REALLY likes gold and even tried to marry a golden statue

Pentar only ever have 1 shirt and tries to revive it every time it's torn

Speptical was the one who married Clown and Branzy, Rek,Leo,Minute,Kab,Jumper and Jaron being witnesses

Jaron solves many mysteries but also makes many more of them

Woogie had the same situation as SB but instead of anyone saving him he just visited his parents and traveled back to the LSSMP

Wemmbu escaped hell twice, so he is put on a watch list with clown

Also wemmbu ate his jail cell's bar and escaped with Zam

Mappic is left handed and likes playing arm wrestling with people

Poafa is a cloud, meaning he can fly and turn into a cloud

People often wonder where terrain lives but never tried to search

Branzy's bloodline is the apart of the watchers making ash half watcher and demon <- (cus of clown)

⁠━⁠☆ﾟ⁠.⁠*⁠･⁠｡ﾟ⁠━⁠☆ﾟ⁠.⁠*⁠･⁠｡ﾟ⁠━⁠☆ﾟ⁠.⁠*⁠･⁠｡ﾟ⁠━⁠☆ﾟ⁠.⁠*⁠･⁠｡ﾟ⁠━⁠☆ﾟ⁠.⁠*

｡⁠:ﾟI'll be back for more 😼😼! Lelele ﾟ⁠:⁠｡

[1toreyouapart]

The Lies We Tell

***FANFIC THAT INVOLVES REAL PEOPLE. 18+ ONLY. MDNI. DO NOT READ IF YOU DON’T LIKE FANFIC THAT INVOLVES REAL PEOPLE***

Summary that tells you nothing: Sometimes everything you ever wanted has been right there, within reach, all along.

CW/TW: Angst, fluff, swearing, friends to lovers, jealousy, smut, fingering, PinV, pet names, friends with benefits, more to come as I actually get things written out.

Just Friends

It's funny how life works sometimes. Someone can tell you they love you in one breath and in the very next shatter your entire reality. One wrong move while driving down the road can alter yours and another person's life forever. A brief conversation with a stranger over a drink and exchanged phone numbers can bring people into your life that you now can't imagine life without them. The latter was exactly how Quinn now found herself in this house, surrounded by the best friends she could have ever hoped for, their banter in the living room bringing a smile to her lips as she dumped snacks into bowls.

The boys had all gotten home from tour a couple days ago, and as always, they had to have a movie night. It sort of became tradition even before Noah had invited her to move in with them. After every tour there was a big family dinner, followed by a movie night where none of them actually paid attention to the movies they chose, too caught up in catching up on everything that happened while they were gone.

"Quinn! Hurry your ass up! I'm starving here!" Folio hollered from the living room.

"Untwist your panties! You're welcome to come help, ya know!" She hollered back.

Truthfully, she should have had someone come help her. The downside to living in this particular house full of guys was that they all were much taller than her. Well, all of them that actually lived there. Which meant everything was up high and she had to climb to reach most things. Meaning it took her longer to get even just snacks together.

"Fucking tall ass motherfuckers," she grumbled, climbing up on the counter to reach some more bowls. She probably should have actually counted how much she needed before starting. Her fault, really. A long tattooed arm wrapped around her waist, hauling her off the counter.

"I swear to God, Quinn. You're going to break your fucking neck one of these days. What do you need?" Noah's voice behind her, somewhat panicked, almost made her giggle.

"Well, if you didn't put shit up so high I wouldn't have to climb to get it! And some more bowls."

Noah shook his head, chuckling. Her best friend and roommate. The person that found her in that bar seven years ago, drinking away the pain of her boyfriend at the time breaking up with her, and somehow took all those broken pieces and put her back together.

When Noah was home they quite literally did everything together. From rock climbing to going to gigs for small local bands. Movie nights up in his room, just the two of them. Shoot, when he was home she barely slept in her own room. Every night, without fail they would fall asleep in his room. It was enough that Jolly had asked them more than once if there was something else going on. And was never satisfied when they told him that they were just friends.

"You could also use the step stool I bought you."

"Step stools are for old people and children. I happen to be neither."

"You're impossible."

"You love me!"

Noah glanced down at her with a smirk as he grabbed some of the filled bowls. Quinn ignored the way her stomach flipped as his dark eyes met hers. Ignored the way her heart began to race. He was her best friend. That she definitely had a crush on. But he could never know that. It would make things weird, and she was happy with the way things were. Truly.

"Come on, my little terror pixie."

Huffing she followed him into the living room. Noah had called her a terror pixie from the night they met. However, the calling her his little terror pixie was something new. And she absolutely hated how warm and fuzzy it made her feel inside. Best friends weren't supposed to feel like that towards the other.

"Fuck off, Bigfoot."

With fake indignation she found her spot on the floor with him, settled right between his legs. Long arms wrapped around her, pulling her back against him, settling loosely around her waist. Quinn didn't miss the look everyone shared, or the way Jolly smirked at them. Like they all knew something she didn't. Or maybe they were, once again, reading too much into the way her and Noah were together.

[verdantwyrm]

On that topic though, I would like to touch more on the subject of Jimmy being also a victim to himself. I fear this might anger a lot of people, but Jimmy is an almost exact perfect example of someone with BPD (As someone with it myself) and how his spiralling is directly tied to Curly.

The game never once insinuates that Jimmy is like this because he's mentally ill, the line of him having it "hard" back on earth doesn't mean anything either, but it also means a lot coming from Curly. Curly is a representative of a Favorite person, and everything Jimmy did in the game, who he hurt, how he did it and the language he used, is very close to how real-life people with BPD sometimes treat their own FPs and the people around them.

They become erratic, jealous, driven by fear, apologetic, desperate and cling to everything and everything. Jimmy insults Curly, twists his words and makes him out the be the villain, he drives everyone away from him at the birthday party and spends months feeding lies to the others that Curly is the one that crashed the ship despite this lie not actually really benefitting Jimmy all that much in the long run.

Jimmy wanted to kill everyone on the ship, he could have lied and instead said that it was simply a fault of the ship, a miscalculation, an accident. Instead, he took every opportunity to make Curly out to be the one who ultimately decided that this was the best way to go about it, and then also blamed it on Curly's mental health dropping after being fired.

This is all extremely elaborate, and a very difficult lie to keep up with, as almost everyone on that ship has plenty of reasons to believe otherwise that Curly didn't crash the ship. What with Anya's psych eval of him being "the same as usual" and being sane enough to continue doing his job. Anya also trusted Curly enough to tell him about the pregnancy, and to also tell him about the gun. And even though it's not very well expressed in the game (possibly intentional since we are seeing through Jimmy's eyes.) She does trust Curly, and she probably continued to trust him even when all was wrong around her.

And Daisuke also has no real reason to distrust Curly, we don't know much about their relationship, but there was definitely a sense of trust and reliability between the both of them. This is also evident through Swansea and Curly, where Curly trusts him enough to hold onto the axe, despite being told to return it to the case as everything has to constantly run through him. He was taking risks, he was terrified of being abandoned, left behind in Curly's shadow. He was having fits of rage, outbursts of suicidal thoughts and harm to himself and to those around him.

Jimmy twisted and kept twisting that knife in an attempt to turn away everyone from Curly even when he was at his lowest to isolate and to make him cling to the only thing he had left; Jimmy.

This adds even more to Curly's eventual condition, being completely reliant on Jimmy, being completely subject to his will and power. And something that he even admitted to liking, he likes power. And he likes that the circumstances given, might not have turned out the best way, it gave Jimmy that power over Curly. Something he had been climbing for a long time, and something he so desperately wanted because he was sick and tired of hearing just how fantastic he was at something Jimmy wasn't.

And yet, despite all of this, Jimmy praised Curly. He hated how much he adored him, hated how much he idolised him. And even at the end of it all, his main focus was just Curly, making him out to be the hero of the story despite spending such a long time attempting to make him out to be the villain.

And then even further to make the situation out to be that he was also the hero of the story, that all of his actions were justified to some degree because it was all for Curly. He fixed it, he fixed everything for Curly. Because despite what he did to Anya, Swanse and Daisuke, his only real concern behind all of it was Curly.

Every hallucination leads to him, every goal, every path. He was so concerned with him, that even when it was directly in his face, the only apology he ever muttered was to Curly. Using Anya's words.

Our worst moments don't make us monsters.

Jimmy is a victim of only himself and the consequences of his own actions, and he is by far one of the better, unintentional examples of BPD.

[g-xix]

☁️Guess the Age | Sharky

Summary: That greenscreen suit had Sharky playing up on shoot and completely derailing the video to simply flirt with you, his brain chemistry honestly altered by seeing your body complemented so beautifully in such an ugly green <3

Notes: normally i hate writing fics based off of vids but this one based on THIS VIDEO was sm fun! ik the beta squad fandom is so dead atm but please boys, band together n appreciate this one 😓✊

The green screen suit wasn't the most comfortable, to say the least. As you walked in, you felt as though you were almost walking diagonally with each step, the suit so tight around your hips that you didn't even have full mobility, having to waddle (it felt) on-stage. Even so, the Beta Squad boys didn't fail to notice your shape in the figure-hugging suit.

"Bloody hell," Chunkz was the first to call it out, and you couldn't help but giggle as you watched him wipe his eyes as though he were seeing things.

Kenny of course found Chunkz's reaction hilarious, bursting into his iconic laughs whilst Niko had simply moved onto the next person - AJ trying to do the same - and Sharky not even attempting, his jaw slackened with wide eyes of shock and simultaneous allure. 

Luckily, each person had a name tag on so that you could at least tell who was who on the judging panel - after all - your friend had told you before coming on that if the one called 'Neeko' (her pronunciation of the name different from the name scribbled onto his card) tried to fist bump you, it was going to be a set up. Avoid at all costs. 

That being said, as your eyes scanned the line up, they definitely lingered on one person. 

Seemingly effortless, leaning back in his chair with his arm around the one to the side, tongue tracing his teeth with his lips parted just a fraction to show off those pearly whites - black durag and dark beard which sculpted that undeniably gorgeous face...

It was definitely too early to have a crush on 'Sharky', but you didn't fail to notice how pretty he was. The way Sharky's eyes seemed to trace down your body made you feel as though he was reciprocating this realisation.

As the introduction drew to a close, two boys were called up to re-order the lineup based on age: Kenny and Niko. They clambered up onto the stage, hand set on Niko's chin, Kenny's hands on hips, the duo scanning each and every one of you.

"You" Kenny moved to examine you. "You look relatively..."

"Good?" You finished his sentence, not wanting to hear how else he could end that sentence. Kenny laughed with the rest of the boys as he realised he'd been droning on,  hand covering his face in embarrassment. 

"Sure, yeah, that," Kenny agreed hastily with a grin, trying to move over the obvious flusterment at the comment. "I feel like you're somewhere around..." Kenny took a step back to look at the line and gesture towards the younger end, between two other contestants. "Here - not the youngest, but far from old."

"So sweet," Came your not-sarcastic-but-somewhat-so response, the boys at the table laughing slightly as Kenny courteously took your hand to lead you down the line to where he stationed you.

And despite the fact you'd been moved, and Kenny and Niko had moved onto the next contestant to judge, you could still feel a pair of eyes watching you.

Looking up from the floor, you made eye contact across the room. Sharky. Looking right back up at you. Obviously, he couldn't see where your eyes faced as the greensuit obscured your face - though he could see your green-covered head move up, and face the same general direction as he sat, relative to you. 

His eyes were dark - like - black hole type dark. The type of dark that sucked you in and had you drowning in the colourless abyss, only highlighted by a coffee coloured tint around the outermost circumference of his irises. 

Raising a hand slowly, maintaining eye contact with you - he held his hand besides his head - elbow resting against the table and fingers outstretched, palm facing you. 

And he wiggled his fingers.

Like a little salute or wave - just seeing whether you were actually looking. Whether he had your attention and you were interested by him - craving to see whether you would show an ounce of interest in him to balance the tonne of fascination he held for you.

So raising your own hand slightly - bending your wrist upwards at your waist so that your palm faced him, without attracting the attention of any of the other cast and set members, you wiggled your fingers, waving subtly back at the attractive man. Sharky was like a kid in a candy shop as you responded, those dark eyes filling with excitement and enthusiasm as he saw you respond; no longer just a prop for the sake of the video - non-verbally agreeing to entertain and interact with Sharky away from the video purpose. He was thrilled, and sat up straight within his chair at the realisation.

Confidence overcoming the enthused noiret, he pulled his fingers together and pressed them against his lips, holding your gaze as he blew a kiss out towards you which you hadn't expected - a heat rushing to your cheeks at the action and making you feel glad that the suit you wore covered your darkening cheeks as your body responded to Sharky's flirting, your arms folded behind your back and hands clasping together - gripping each other tightly with awe - the voice inside your head quietly screaming, cheering and panicking in the background of your conscience. 

"Are you paying flipping attention?" 

Sharky's flirting was interrupted as Chunkz had turned around to observe the boy with a weary look. 

"Yeah, to someone." Sharky lost eye contact to look back to you with a wink, your cheeks only darkening more, fingers shaking slightly though you masked your physical symptoms of nerves as you pressed a hand to your chest to show how flattered you were.

"What the hell is Sharky doing?" Niko questioned with surprise, laughing despite the shock as he turned to look between yourself and Sharky - your stance with all your weight resting on one foot, turning slightly on one leg on the spot whilst Sharky stared up at you - taking his lower lip between his teeth just a bit too sensually for you to cope, being up on a stage and recorded for millions to see.

And so you looked away.

The next round was announced soon enough however, and the video progressed onto the next segment. "FOR ROUND TWO, COULD YOU PLEASE STATE YOUR NAME  AND WHAT YOU DO."

You stepped up, giving your name to the panel, and adding your role as: "A dance coach". The boys sat at the table let out ooohs, and Sharky's lips curled into a smirk, pen resting across those lips as he took it withing his mouth for a moment.

"Gotta be somewhat young to have an active job like that." Niko reasoned with the boys on their chairs, his suggestion met with hums of agreement.

"But not too young y'know - you have to have experience and to have learnt how to do those dances in the first place." Chunkz countered, and was met with another hum of agreement.

"What type of dance do you do?" Sharky looked up at you and asked. "Just out of interest."

"I do multiple." You answered. "A lot of contemporary and hip-hop just personally - but I teach more trad like jazz, ballroom, tango..."

"How'd you get into dance?"

"I started with traditional Bharatnatyam - I'm from Tamil Nadu originally, so I started with that traditional dance style."

Chunkz's interest peaked as you mentioned Indian heritage, readying to get into an avid conversation about Bollywood and different songs... Though AJ had to cut the round short so that Chunkz didn't overexcite and spend the next half hour discussing with you. Not before Sharky got to pry more into your dance experience, however.

"What's that dance style like?"

"Well, it involves a lot of muscle control - especially around the core - and it actually helped me then get into belly dancing more-"

Sharky let out a noise that made everyone pause in shock. You were cut off and stunned as the man you'd found yourself with peaked interest towards... growl?? Some strange mix of circling his head and emitting a purr-growl hybrid that shocked now only you, but all the other boys on the panel, too.

"Right, chill out, that's e-NOUGH-" AJ was the one to stand up and call off that round.

The next round was personal questions, and each question which you received seem to elude more and more at Sharky. At least Niko was one of the only boys with his head in the game, as he started with what was at least somewhat of a normal question.

"What phone do you have?" Niko asked, and you sighed already knowing you'd disappoint.

"I have a galaxy - m30s model."

The boys hissed from their seats.

"I can change her, guys." Sharky mumbled to the rest of the panel boys, though you heard it and laughed. Sharky looked up with a hint of an alarmed expression - pointing at you with a grin and saying - "You weren't meant to hear that-" before following up with "ontomyquestionthough - what's your number?"

You and the boys burst out laughing at that, knowing it was a joke though still feeling your fingers trembling with nerves because - oh my fuck - he was very, very into you. And it wasn't even secret any more. That man was unashamedly thirsting, and you were scared, knowing that you get flustered all too easily, which wouldn't be helped by the fact that you actually liked this guy that was making you feel all flustered.

Then Kenny's question.

"Okay, this could tell a lot about your age..." He looked up from his notepad. "What is your type."

You rolled your eyes, though no-one saw.

"I'm a connection over looks person." You gave quite a concise answer before expanding further. "Only physical thing I care about is a man that's taller than me and is relatively physically fit... Other than that though, I care more about whether they're sweet, likeable, and we get on well, really."

"Have you found that person yet?" Kenny pressed with a grin as he asked.

You shook your head in response. Kenny leaned behind Chunkz's back and pat Sharky on the back as a show of support. You rolled your eyes again.

"Just another quick one," Chunkz nonchalantly referenced before his question which was once again, Sharky-oriented. "Are you old enough to date a 28 year old?"

You dead stared at the man for a few seconds. "Yes." Your response was met with cheers from the panel and you couldn't help the laugh that escaped your lips, even when you wanted to be annoyed about the fact that not a single one of these questions really gave a good idea of your age.

And finally, it was Sharky's turn to ask his question.

"So, you said you were a dance coach... Can I dance with you?" 

You looked at the man in his seat. Smirk gone, sweet smile and wide, hopeful eyes. He looked disgustingly cute - like a cherub with the innocent expression that was almost impossible to refuse. Sighing and looking down, you gave a nod and offered a hand to get him up into the stage.

And dear God was he 10x more attractive when he was stood opposite you.

Six foot two. At least. He towered over you, your height making you eye-level with his chest and forcing you to look up at the man that had such an attractive face - dark eyes already something you'd ogled at, but ten times more alluring when they were barely a foot away from your own, his lips soft and balmed, perfectly even on both sides and two toned with the upper one slightly darker. 

Sharky was obviously awkwardly stood there. Looking down at the bright green orb that was your head for long enough for it to feel slightly uncanny...

But you couldn't help yourself from not doing anything. Because in that time where you just stilly looking up at him, you were admiring his face. From the darkness around his sleepy eyes that only made him even more attractive, to the facial hair that framed those pretty lips. 

"Sorry-uhm-what dance did you say you do again?" Sharky paused your moment to admire by breaking the silence. You heard a couple of the boys on the panel quietly giggle as you were quite obviously broken from your trance, body un-locking as you came back to conscience.

"Right, uhm, we can do a slow sort of waltz-that's quite simple-it's just box stepping..."

You took Sharky's right hand within yours and held it out in front of your bodies. Sharky instinctively put his other hand around your waist - the large hand sitting on the curve above your hips and encompassing the space, pulling your body closer to his.

You could feel his body brush against yours, and although for the waltz, Sharky should've had his hand higher and on your back... You didn't have it in you to move his hand, as you guiltily indulged within the feeling of his perfectly sized hand against your body, the feeling of it making a blush rise to your cheeks. It's fine, you told yourself; you were a contemporary dancer, and letting Sharky rest his hand on your waist was technically just a modern twist on the classic Waltz you'd learned.

"Okay, so it's step back-left-forwards, and then right-" Your words were met with Sharky following the instructions, pivoting with you and following the box steps, his hand on your waist surprisingly leading you and working well with your movements as he danced with you. 

The close proximity between your bodies allowed something to infiltrate your suit - a scent passing through the green second-skin and through to your nostrils, where pine and mint interwove and had you leaning in closer to Sharky to chase that scent and smell more of it. Because holy fuck it was absolutely delicious. You wanted to spray your entire apartment with that scent and then crawl inside the bottle of perfume - or cologne - whatever it was. 

Sharky shocked you as he pulled away and raised his arm above you, spinning you around and making you laugh as you turned around, one of Sharky's arms detaching and pulling you into his body before dipping slightly - letting you lean into his arm as he leaned you back, his face ever so close to yours, his exhale fanning gently over your green suit.

And you only realised that you'd blocked out the noise of the other boys, when you heard them clap and let out whistles once the two of you paused in that position, indicating an end.

"Did you learn anything about her age from that?" Chunkz asked once Sharky returned down to the panel after having danced with you on the stage.

Sharky looked at the man with a dazed expression, as though his brain chemistry had been altered and his mental formations still hadn't quite recovered since. "I think she's the one," was all that he could get out.

It was fair to say that after the final rearrangement, you were scared to unmask in front of the audience. You knew you'd become a key character in this line up. There was chemistry between you and Sharky, and he'd fallen for who you were with the mask on.

Hand clutching the back of your suit, you could feel your heartbeat in your throat. Fearing. Because all that attraction and everything Sharky liked about you could dissipate within seconds, if Sharky didn't like the face behind the green suit. Worst of all, if he said anything about that to your face. It'd break you.

"Now, Mrs Sharkmarke, could you please de-mask."

You could've thrown up from the nerves that sent goosebumps crawling down every limb of your body as you pulled the suit down from your head to neck. 

The bright lights were blinding for a moment - suit resting at your neck as you fluffed your curls out, having been flattened in the suit. Unscrunching your face and accustoming yourself to the bright lights and looking down at the panel below...

You didn't notice any of the boys other than Sharky.

And his jaw was slackened, his hand slowly coming up to press to his mouth.

He looked... shocked?

You felt your heart sinking. Sinking, sinking, sinking - because his expression was truly unreadable as a positive or negative response, and you felt the need to brace. Just in case it turned out that Sharky felt the latter, as though he didn't like you at all.

"You're actually gorgeous..."

You could've collapsed from the way that your braced body felt relief shoot through and unclench every tightened muscle, before a lightness spread through your head - affirmation making dopamine flood through your system and your lips curl into a smile as you looked down to the man at the panel who still had his mouth covered with a hand - though now you could see the smile beneath his fingers.

Awhhs fell from the lips of every other person on the panel, and Chunkz pat the man's back with a smile on his face. 

"You wanna exchange Instagrams or numbers or something?" Kenny pressed with a grin, looking between the two of you. 

And as soon as you raised your brows and gave the smallest of nods to say yeah, i could do that - Sharky was onto his feet and getting back up onto the raised platform to thrust his phone into your hand with an empty contact so that you could fill out your details.

And Sharky didn't finish creating the contact until he had taken a picture of you with your hand next to your face - his fingers interlocked with yours, showing you two holding your hands together whilst you sported the widest grin - using that photo as a contact photo. 

Before Sharky handed you your phone back after having made a contact for himself in your phone, you watched as he opened up your Google calendar and scanned your week to see... That you were available Friday at 8pm.

He handed back your phone after a second, and you noticed that scheduled at 8 o'clock the next Friday was "Date with cute Beta Squad guy (we're going Wagamama's.)" 

And leaving that shoot, when you crossed paths with Sharky once de-microphoned and removed from the green-suit prison, you looked up at him with a smile and "See you Friday," having him smile as he returned the "See you then, gorgeous," making you leave the shoot with a blush all over your face and giggle escaping your lips as you made it back to your car and realised your phone was ringing.

Your best friend had called you - the one who had warned you just last night about how you shouldn't accept a fist bump from Neeko. 

"HOW WAS IT?!" Her excited voice called out from the phone speaker as you placed your phone in the control panel and let out a squeal.

"Oh my GOD, DO I HAVE A STORY ABOUT HOW IT WENT."

Hope you enjoyed reading!! Feel free to interact- whether that be a comment, vote or follow! Requests open, feel free to submit what u wanna see... Much love!!

To see more for Beta Squad and other YouTubers, here's my MASTERLIST

And here's my WATTPAD, with 50+ more oneshots to read

p.s. Customise which Oneshots YOU want to be tagged in by submitting your preferences on THIS GOOGLE FORM + join the taglist!!!

SHARKY TAGLISTTTTT:

@clarkeysbog, @mekselinaurr, @springholland, @xxkatxgracexx, @certainsaturn

@daniiixoxo, @mekselinaurr, @blackbat2020, @ajshabsxxwife, @bisexualmess4eva

@dollxkill, @eviebow, @kennysimp101, @martini4lyfe, , @zandrax

@lilyyxoii, @notalloutofusernames, @pinkpomelo, @wh4theduck

@scassty1202, @nikoomilanaswife, @thankunextx, @un1ver53

[raisedbythetv89]

“bUfFy sHoUlD hAvE eNdEd aT sEaSoN 5” I will crawl through my phone and come out yours “the ring” style

You hate spuffy? Your business. You hate Tara’s death and everything Willow did to Tara? VALID. You wish seeing red didn’t exist? Literally so do all of us. Hating certain plot points is one thing but YOU WANT BUFFY DEAD????? You want the suicidal girl who has been sacrificing everything for EVERYONE else since she was 15 years old when she was offered up to angel as a reward for trying to do some good in his pathetic life and called to fight evil ALONE to kill herself at 20? Literally welcoming her death with open arms she is so ready to be done with life and this fight (yes I know it was to save Dawn and the world but neither of those negate the fact that they established she has a death wish and that one day she just wouldn’t want to fight anymore bc her life is just that hard - that is the textbook definition of being suicidal)

THAT IS HOW YOU WANT IT TO END?????

Seriously take 80 steps back from me expeditiously. That ending reaffirms the idea that women should just give and give and give until it kills them. That the only good victims are dead ones. Oh season 6 is sad and uncomfortable and you miss the vibes of the previous seasons? Guess what every single person who has been traumatized wishes to be the person they were before that they can never get back to. Buffy season 6 and 7 is one of the most important representations of what healing looks like after severe trauma and chronic abuse. It’s an obscenely important story to exist. It tells victims of trauma and people who suffer from depression there is a way THROUGH you CAN recover you won’t be the same but you’ll be even better if you learn to love yourself. Because of seasons 6&7 Buffy gets to reach actual adulthood empowered and supported in a way she never has been before and escaping the town that had become her personal hell

This is not some sort of evolved, media literate take that so many like to present it as. Buffy ending at s5 would just reaffirm so many problematic and harmful narratives around mental health, healing, and what is possible for women and people with childhood trauma.

S7 & the comic s12 ending tell us that it DOES get better and that death is not the way out and fighting for your future even if you can’t picture is will be worth it 🖤

[outrunningthedark]

Do you ever get that uncomfy feeling about fandom dissecting cast interviews and heavily interacting and sharing interactions? Like I ship (shipped? Put off by parasocialness and lfj love) bucktommy and buddie but the fandom is so offputting.

Like appreciating the cast ofc is fair and fun but I cant help but feel like, this broken wall of seperation makes finishing or reaolving the bucktommy break up less likely.

I think im overthinking a bit, but this buddie outrage, lfj sharing posts and interacting, people bashing OS about his wording, like the idea that in 8B. Tim and whoever thinks, okay they should come back. The idea of those actors having to interact after all this (in sone ways) overblown drama makes me cringe and i cant properly express why. Maybe its the lack of escapism?

I cant fully express my thoughts on this properly but i have agreeed with most of your posts on the subject. You articulate stuff well.

Dont mean to bash people that love to follow the cast closely but idk when i see it all blur on my page, i get so weirded out. Anyway ignore if this makes no sense or is irrelevant.

I do get what you're trying to say, and that's where the root of the issues with Oliver's behavior stems from. We, as a fandom, should not be able to *notice* when a particular cast member is being left out of cast moments behind the scenes. Yes, he was professional on set and got through his scenes, but the ONLY reason people have started to put two and two together re: his concerns over "backlash" is because of we just saw happen while Lou was on the show. Before, we could tell ourselves "Well maybe Oliver's just tired of these forced hetero relationships that will go nowhere". But now his character is canonically queer. And he chose not to acknowledge the story line outside of one post that got deleted and a couple of stories. (One of which was most definitely advised for good PR given how he recorded it on the fly - Bi Visibility Day). Viewers should have been able to watch the story line with NO preconceived notions of how anybody really felt. Viewers should have been able to feel sad about the break up without Oliver immediately jumping into a story about how HE TEXTS THE GUY WHO WROTE TOMMY OFF to let Buck go back to his 1.0 phase. Viewers should have been able to believe the guy who seemed so excited to celebrate his character's coming out sympathized with the disappointment. But because Oliver only worries about the hate HE receives, because Oliver puts HIS feelings first when telling a queer (potential) love story on tv, fandom is left to wonder whether he even liked the direction of Buck's story line, whether he actually DID have anything to do with Tommy get written off as quickly as he did. Fans look into things because Oliver leaves the door open.

[mytearsbuckochet]

What's your most hated Bummy scene?? I'll tell you mine. It has to be the kiss in the hospital lobby and buck getting outed because of his soot covered mouth. Never hated a 911 episode more than that. I love Buck. They just made a mockery out of him by that scene.

Where do I even start.. Couldn't agree more about the soot scene, although I'm more angry at the writers about that one than I am at Tommy, given how important it was to Buck that he came out to Eddie and Maddie on his own terms and how much weight he gave those interactions I feel like even though that one was supposed to be a cute little "hehe look this is very Buck coded", it fell short in that I would've liked everyone else at the 118 to find out in a more heartfelt way ya know??

In terms of my least favourite(s), the whole arc with billy boils was a very interesting play by the writers in that it highlighted the differences between Eddie and Tommy in a meaningful way. On one hand, Eddie, who has presumably been with Buck in the hospital the whole time he was being treated for his boils, is used to Buck's hyperfixations and Wiki deep dives, and finds them wholesome and cute. I reblogged a post a little bit ago where Buck told Maddie about how her and Chim always finish each others sentences and that theyre basically already dating, and then contrasted with how Eddie was finishing Buck's sentences in that scene. Buddie fanatic aside (I will admit im obsessed with these two idiots), THIS is the kind of domesticity I've always wanted for Buck's partners, where they acknowledge and love those little moments that he has.

Now lets go ahead and look at Tommy's side of this whole thing: Tommy's reaction to seeing the boils + how he treated and viewed Buck's obsession as exactly that, an obsession + the graveyard scene??? You can break it down into "oh well Buddie have known eachother since s2, Bummy have been together 6 months", but from my perspective the fact that Buck didn't even realise Tommy didn't like women until their 6 month anniversary (???) just goes to show that they don't really know that much about one another. Tommy was completely right in the breakup scene; he was definitely not Buck's last, and the poor guy is definitely in need of some self exploration (#letbuckfuck) before I'd be happy to see Buddie honestly (and thats not even considering the work that needs to be done on Eddie, my guy is going through it rn with Chris). Anyway; I just read this amazing fic by playinginthundestorms (on ao3) and I think the way they described Tommy (slightly Tommy bashing), was overall how I imagine he sees Buck. It never really felt like Tommy was fond of these little things Buck does in the way that Eddie (and the rest of the 118) are, more seeing him as childish or juvenile as the fic described. And it makes sense, tommy is older than Buck. A whole other can of worms and probably the icing on the cake for me was the Abby debacle, the misogyny really showed??? like man you have not changed since Hen my lord. Calling Abby out for running off with some "himbo half her age" was wild considering thats what he is currently doing with Buck? Especially with all the shit she had to go through with her mum at the time? Like what on earth is your excuse Temu? Anyway, to cut a long rant short, I actually have given you like 50 reasons, but i definitely think that Tommy was a well placed plot device and it was obvious from the start. Also, ABC could've chosen ANYONE to be Buck's first experience with a man and they were like yep lets use the racist homophobe from Chim and Hen begins cos why not?! I probably would've had a far less negative opinion of him if he was a fresh character, and I think that's on purpose, I think it would be really interesting if they go down the road of hen and chim sharing their experiences with Tommy now that they've broken up, and that they didn't say anything cos they just wanted Buck to be happy. Definitely after that heartfelt scene with Hen especially, that I didn't get cos of that bloody soot scene.