#And chocolate hearts are great!

[aelx-jstu-bgiinv]

tea rose and cotton candy :]

-justs

I jstu elov adeelmno!

Adn accehloot aehrst aer aegrt!

[pink-tk-a-latte]

I love the “cold guy is actually a huge softie on the inside" trope, not in the “omg he’s giving me his jacket while refusing to make eye contact with me aww he really does care” way but in the “holy crap he brainwashed the entire planet to get me out of trouble and none of us noticed wth” way

[goldensunset]

i just think that kh3 re:mind

[officersnickers]

❤️🩷🧡🤎🧡🩷❤️

[dailyfranbow]

Daily Fran Bow Feb 14th 2024

Happy Valentine's Day!! Here's a Palontras with a letter for you 💌

[constantvariations]

So damn funny to me how the dc comics' Taurudonna is completely inversed to the show

Show!Adam: my darling, I only ever wanted you by my side as we watch the world burn together

Show!Blake: we live here, you idiot

Meanwhile...

Comic!Blake: I'm not afraid of you (romantic)

Comic!Adam: cool. Didn't ask

[squarebracketsmileyface]

I both love and hate the way Sorry it's locked has just completely taken over my brain. I think about it fucking constantly. On the plus side tho, I found another song that reminds me of it: dogbird by Madds Buckley.

Like, I heard it and went, oh this is Jay thinking about himself and Tim, but then like, I thought about it more and it's actually more like Alex's point of view on himself and his relationship with Jay. It's so evil. I love it.

Like, damnit I wanna do a whole thing on each lyric and how it relates to Jaylex hang on 💀 this is probably gonna end up too long.

It has, in fact, ended up pretty long. Also warning for mentions of sex and kink etc, nothing graphic, but just in case you don't know what Sorry It's Locked is

Alex being the dog and Jay being the bird just makes sense honestly. Like, especially from Alex's pov, Jay is fragile, but also free (from the self hatred that is eating Alex alive) like a bird and Alex is scared of breaking him, even though he also knows just how much Jay can actually take. He knows Jay's tough as nails, but he also sort of sees him as fragile, not because he is, but because Alex wants to be able to protect and care for him properly. But Alex is a dog, he has sharp teeth and claws and everything he tries to do just ends up with Jay getting hurt (usually emotionally, because both of them enjoy the physical stuff) so his self hatred gets worse and he hurts Jay more.

Then the events of Marble Hornets happen and Alex can turn it around because now hurting Jay is the right thing to do, because it'll drive Jay away and stop him from dragging himself into this mess, which means Alex won't have to kill him to save him.

Okay, anyway, lyrics:

Like, with this bit it's Alex talking about how scared he is, because in Sorry It's Locked he's fucking terrified of EVERYTHING. He's scared of the operator, he's scared of losing Jay, he's scared of keeping Jay, he's scared of everything, so he lashes out, digs his claws in to try and drive Jay away, because that'll keep Jay safe from the operator, if he stops investigating etc.

Also "I cry when something shakes the walls" to me is very much Alex being all alone dealing with all the shit from the operator, not knowing when it'll show up again etc. So any noise in his house that he's not expecting is terrifying to him.

[Chorus]

This can go for Alex precanon or during Sorry It's Locked, honestly.

He feels guilty for how he treats Jay, even though he knows they both enjoy the rougher, more kinky sex, but he also has always made sure that they never got too genuinely close and intimate (like kissing or cuddling properly, or Jay staying the night, or them fucking in a bed etc) because it scared Alex that he liked Jay like that, that he wanted to be gentle with him. (Internalised homophobia precanon, and then fear for Jay's safety from the Operator during)

He knew that if Jay stayed the night he'd be quiet and gentle and kind to Alex, and Alex didn't know how he'd ever cope with that. So he just made sure he'd never have to cope with that.

Now during Sorry It's Locked Alex wishes that Jay had never met him because he knows how much he's hurt Jay emotionally. He wants Jay to hurt him back but he knows Jay never will, either because Jay's too much of a nice person (eh) or because he's too scared of Alex, especially given everything he kind of now knows Alex has done.

Alex wishes Jay would leave of his own accord, but he knows Jay never will. He has to drive him away, and the only way he can think to do that is to hurt him so bad that Jay will hate him. Hence the kisses and then Alex lashing out in the kitchen and saying he was pretending it was Amy. (I hate him. I want to give him therapy.)

More stuff about precanon Sorry It's Locked Jaylex in this one, specifically Alex and his internalised homophobia and fear of coming out to anyone or letting anyone know he and Jay were anything to each other. He'd want to say he wasn't ashamed, but nah he definitely was, not ashamed of liking Jay, or not only that. He was also ashamed of the fact that he didn't stand up to anyone when they made jabs or digs towards him or Jay. Also, homophobic family, because he just seems like the type, and it's my fic so I can say that he had a homophobic family.

BUT, because of said family, Alex knows that his own self hatred will hurt Jay too, so he's apologising to Jay for the fact that he's still unable to sort his shit out, so he's still on the leash and choking on his own homophobia and self hatred and he's trying not to let it get onto Jay, but he can't really. He feels like there's nothing he can do except hurt jay. It's just his nature. His breed. And Alex is scared to try and step outside that. Hence him leaping at the chance to be with Amy.

(Tho he DID love her, a lot, a lot a lot and at the time he didn't even realise he was at least partly so eager to date her as an excuse to get away from his feelings for Jay, he figured that out later on and actually talked to Amy about it. Because I swear to god Alex got at least one healthy relationship in this damn fic. He deserves it, and Amy's perfect for it)

Anyway, Alex was scared to try and push past his own self hatred, even though he kind of knew (and definitely knows now) that not doing so will just leave Jay even more hurt and "crushed at his side"

Then it's the chorus again, with the same meanings as before.

The whole thing with habits and instincts? The bell ringing and mouth watering? Alex feels like he's been trained to hurt Jay, like no matter what he does he can't help but hurt Jay even though that's the last thing he wants to do. Then the Operator shows up and Alex has no choice, he HAS to hurt Jay to keep him safe, just like he had to hurt and kill so many other people to save them. He wants Jay to hate him. He wants Jay to be afraid of him, anything that'll stop Jay coming back and dragging himself into all the shit that's happening.

But then Jay isn't scared, or he IS, but he's not scared enough, and he's definitely not scared enough of Alex. And Alex can't decide whether he's glad about that or not. Because on the one hand he NEEDS jay to be scared of him, but emotionally he doesn't WANT jay to be scared of him because he likes him and he really wants them to work their shit out, but the time's wrong and it's not safe for Jay to stay.

He feels bad for how he has to treat Jay to try and scare him off, then feels hideously guilty for it afterwards because god what a monster he must be to treat someone he loves like that. Then he feels all sorry for himself and then feels bad for feeling sorry for himself lmao.

Wishing that little songbird was still mine, basically what happens with Alex after chapter two is him losing his shit over the fact that Jay's gone again, and Alex feeling like absolute dogshit because they went full circle. They fell apart in uni, didn't see each other for ages, saw each other again, picked up where they left off, fucked everything up, and now Alex has lost Jay for good. Because this time he HAS to make sure Jay doesn't come back because it's genuinely soooooooooo unsafe because of the Operator and if Jay comes back Alex will have no choice but to kill him. (He blocks Jay's number etc so that Jay can't contact him and try to arrange a time they can meet up again etc)

ALSO "my love is sick"??? Also very Alex feeling like there's something wrong with how he loves, because in the end he's hurt and/or killed everyone he's loved. Like, damn this poor man would have SO many issues if he survived, maybe I'm gonna be doing him a favour by killing him in the fic I have planned for around entry 80-85 💀

This shit's so messy and it probably makes no sense but I don't care I needed to get it out of my head, and it was gone midnight when I wrote this lmao

[ofluminance-a]

i woke up to spam from cam and ponpon telling me to read the b.nha leaks, and i did. & i've already been fed and ruined for the entire day, oh my god. MY GIRL!!! BOTH OF MY GIRLS!!!! 😩😭

ochako has retaken the braincell, and I am hxhdhbdhehsjsjjsjxhdurjcj WHAT DID I JUST READ!??!?! HORI, THANK YOU, BUT--- after this do we FINALLY get an update on bakugou? PLEASE?

[aromantic-academic]

People who don’t enjoy Valentine’s Day because they don’t have a romantic partner are WEAK.

Heart shaped day is wonderful. It doesn’t have to be about romantic love.

Platonic Valentine’s girlies rise up 💪

[loverofallthingssmart]

maybe the world is good and kind and the universe has its place for me

[autistic-shaiapouf]

Like. Without stickers my laptop is sleek and silver and lowkey looks a little futuristic but where's the charm other than that

[iliveinprocrasti-nationn]

realised the reason my heart issues freak me out is partly because unlike any of my pain it’s harder to just deal with it or find ways around it and also it could be a lot more dangerous than most of my other day to day medical stuff and also it was one of my cancer symptoms

[awritersbro]

The Candymakers by Wendy Mass is a masterclass in Point of View hiding and revealing information. Is there any other book or story that tackles POVs like that? Covering the same events from different characters' Points of View and revealing not only what the characters think of each other and the situations they're in but also what they think of themselves

[blujayonthewing]

god I wish I liked hot chocolate more, I love it so much in theory but in practice I'm always just kinda done with it like four sips in

[crescentmp3]

hiii! 'tis me.

[bluethedream]

wanna crawl off to a dark corner and never leave