#And all that's happened completely offscreen

[bayetea]

I'm gonna froth at the mouth over this in the tags so bear with me but reason #1278038 why the way rick went about breaking up jiper was bad: rereading her povs in hoo where she gushes over jason feels like even more of an unreliable narrator queer girl comphet psychological horror story

[unproduciblesmackdown]

another day another part of a discussion w/an asexual lens making me think of billions, starting with the articulated normative concept (which is clearly part of an assumption billions' material works off of & expects the viewer to work off of to interpret that material) that for men sex is a matter of fact need whereas for women sex (that they might Seek themselves, beyond dutifully providing it in the face of a man's Need) is an indulgence, like lol imagining billions being like yeah i mean cmon is [woman] supposed to pretend she doesn't have a body with needs :/ while it's like prince taking advantage of women & wags looking for another Young Woman Body to use as thing that gives him His Progeny & it's like aw it's great actually that you have Wants, that's so empowered of you guys

obviously thinking of winston in that mix & what creation &/or leveraging of increased vulnerability is also taken as matter of fact or empowering indulgence or something, rather than analyzed re: power dynamics....& then was thinking that like yeah billions assumes winston is a man but makes him the engaging site of Doing Things Wrong that it doesn't even Partly, With Many Limits, engage with critically as it does re: introducing taylor as someone who "does things wrong," (but not too much. stop that) or then, like, rian in the same vein, but what a surprise that in often already putting up these limits on of what & how much taylor's character can actually fundamentally put things taken as "normal (unquestionable) & correct" into a critical context, amazing that rian's character as supposedly another level of [taylor] added to that actually gets reined in immediately like "oh you can't actually be That abnormal, for Real" (then also immediately treated as yeah true i'm a normal i'm a paragon what the hell am i doing Leaving here i Do belong here. you've never seen me with a hat) & after billions doesn't have [rian serves the purpose of taylor having dialogue at someone. or alleged but largely insubstantial nonmeaningful conflicts Or resolutions] or [rian, ofc assumed woman, serves the woman purpose of "keeper of body man uses to have sex" for a plotline as or more insubstantial & antimeaningful (besides the substance & meaning of all the preexisting normative perspectives on gender/sexuality & power dynamics) as anything has ever been] or even [rian, just zany enough to be abusive to winston in ways beyond doing your best to filter out / deny that he exists] like oh None of that's relevant? rian is completely some background rando who just goes "yeah what he said" to background randos like dollar bill & victor or just stands in for those roles here & there, indistinguishably except whoa hey didn't you notice she's a girlboss version of these rando assholes

but like back to how winston is "wrong" in a way that cannot be questioned or question the "right"ness in that paradigm (flipping the script, rejecting the premise. of course that winston was "wrong" to do that is Factual), or ofc if you did it would be a joke with no meaning that could Really be considered to be "real" questionability of the assumptions that dictate what winston Factually Is (wrong)....that ofc sex isn't a "need" for some particular created Class of people, but it's the hierarchal elevation of that class (i.e. patriarchy) that can frame it as a "need" that ofc in actuality isn't about anyone dropping dead but as an Entitlement that one can Expect to have fulfilled, indeed supposedly "matter of fact" when the "fact" is that the concept here is that a man will have sex if he wants it, so what's to distinguish it from fulfilling a need he can Expect to have met b/c he will literally die without it? meanwhile whether a woman "wants" sex is beside the point when her body is a component of [men's fulfilled need for sex] & thus that question of "want" is an "extra" matter that is only relevant if a woman seems to be engaging in sexual activity in a way not fully contained by the concept of [fulfilling a man's need] wherein it's like the idea of oh this woman Wants sex is "useful" in ways that would reinforce patriarchy: sex work happens in an socioeconomic context that doesn't start & end in the domain of Individual Men? call that "wanting sex" to be like, yeah i assume i'll have sex in the future according to what i'm traded for it, not according to the enshrined Need Of A Man(tm)....& then to just accept the same premises, women don't Need Sex (i.e. aren't entitled to get it from men, independent of whether the man wants that at all or from them specifically, the way it is re: men "needing" sex from women) & their "wanting" it is something Extra to their status as fulfillers of men's sexual needs, but what if instead of that "want" being Bad, we saw it as Good? like hell yeah that's Empowered of you? feminism wins, done & dusted

back to winston for real like he is a role seen as Wanting things, And That's Bad. he wants things all the other characters are here wanting, like to have relationships of various kinds, get validation & be re/affirmed, get to partake in the activities that others are by virtue of Being There, such as "communicating," but it's more "well, of course. they're only human" for others & it's Pathetic of winston & offputting & arrogant in the ways that he seeks getting these wants met, or meeting them by doing [xyz] in the first place, like Being Present b/c he wants to be, & he is Out Of Line in doing so b/c others are supposed to be superior, which is meaningful insofar as they have authority over him for it, thus he Ought to have his "extra" "wanting" denied as much as possible b/c hm turns out Superior Authorities aren't just such benevolent omniscient shepherds of the inferior that it's all harmonious & there's not as much extraction in a situation of greatest precarity as possible....prince a sicko for seeing things that way, wendy is correct for seeing herself that way though, & anyone who lashes out at winston on sight for whatever reason is correct for it too, b/c call it a generous benefaction of ABA

anyway people "needing" all this stuff, can't go without it, how could you expect them to??? which is to say ofc it's not a "need" like they would be able to point to themselves dying without it, but it's something that can always be Expected to be accessed / obtained due to an Entitlement to it (backed up by power leverage). if it's not happening in that context, it's back to being a "want" that someone would be arrogant to Expect or out of line to Seek, including by "demanding" it which would be asking or arguing for it beyond what is heroically charitably given in a way that does not threaten the elevated superiority of the giver who has taken pity thusly....winston being put in a queer context unbeknownst to billions for being assumed a man but "wrong" at it (while billions also doesn't think about how it saddles the other quant with the demands of a cishet context, two sides same coin going on there in the "right" vs "wrong" quant duo) & unlike True Men he is not entitled to sex, thus, it's something he Wants b/c the [he can Never Have It, that would be wrong] is incompatible with being that alleged Need that of course these other men just "have to" pursue & obtain with all their bonus power leverages, i.e. they Are Going To, vs winston Not going to, "obviously," even as it isn't obvious at all b/c why would it be? he even gets to implicitly have had sex ever Just for the purposes of how "factually" wrong it is, imagine Learning anything about sex or not being born with the Right Body, no question that those "ideals" are undeniable reality, emphasis on the "undeniable," hey if the eugenics is still systemically entrenched who's to "question" it lol? those targeted? same as "how can Women question that Men need sex"? it's god or nature that dictates this gender binary, insofar as i don't Need to convince anyone of it to be enforcing it. force of nature. as is the "need" of a man to have sex. as is whatever the abusive party feels like doing at any given time, if you're the abused stuck in that situation. May As Well Be, so

all that to say like winston has this "extra" "want" for Everything b/c billions thinks he is a punching bag nonperson who ultimately anyone deserves to violate & assault however to whatever extent (where any restraint is just the assumed bounds of what would be too "unseemly" in the context of the broader situation, which is pretty arbitrary & just changes upon whenever billions decides "oh actually this violent action is Serious" like dollar bill was good to go the whole time, wags was, wendy is just creating Fun if she puts on a performance of this eruption of violence in the office the same ep she yells & slams some phone around after putting the tmcers in front of the people who are assaulting them but it's not That Serious....the entire idea that "of course" there are these absolute concrete boundaries based on what's "too much" that you would just Feel at the time such that you couldn't possibly find yourself in the wrong b/c you would have preempted Doing that inappropriate act; the entire idea that "oh yeah Some people are less of real people than me but i'd Know when i went Too Far" as though "too far" isn't mostly bounded by what you can get away with &/or is rewarded for how it plays into this hierarchy as is of who is inferior vs superior. dehumanization? don't mind if i do, b/c i'm against it, except like, you don't have to "be against dehumanization" to be against dehumanization, right? your inner sense of The Vibes would make sure you never "really" did that, same as Everything Else ostensibly based on principles that don't actually need to be exercised "on principle"....don't Really have a problem with in group / out group so long as i'm in the out group. it's not bad for anyone to do something to someone, it's bad to be anyone someone could do something to. and winston is definitely someone that anyone could do anything to :) what's more shocking than this: victim blaming being completely the Norm, abuse being the Norm, the Norm comfortably containing all the violence that it already does & able to obfuscate & deflect actual questioning of it b/c it can so far just keep doing it one way or another, may as well Need to be this way, may as well be the only possible way b/c it arises out of these assumed beliefs that are just Universally Human, thus would happen no matter what & it can only be this way. the autistic rando Would be treated like this in every universe :) as another way of believing it Unquestionable, b/c it is surely inherently Inviolable

bringing it back around from whatever might have been the thread there: also Lol Lmao (dire) that part of what makes winston's sexuality so cringefail is that he doesn't consider himself "entitled" to have sex w/any particular woman, such as his crush, As He Should if he were a man in the Right ways, i.e. "truly," i.e. he is more like a woman, i.e. inferior, which is absolutely what we see in how winston treats him, like a woman he doesn't "need" sex (is entitled to it) & so he "wants" sex & this is suddenly not Empowered of him b/c why would billions go "oh right, uh, feminism win" when it doesn't see him as "really" a woman, just a man who is too Like one, thus not bestowed with the ostensible Girlboss lens on every single woman on billions ever, feminism win again, a Boyemployee out here fr to be Humorously Abused by one of those girlbosses, with we the viewers assumed to assume that girlboss recognizes the fact that winston's sexuality is a repulsive deviant intrusion trying to disrupt the Natural Order (nothing to question in that, am i right? my cishet agenda'd men who would never research anything about having sex & can Sense what kind of bodies everyone has b/c well isn't it always so obvious? if it weren't, that in & of itself would be Too much of a turnoff. i would never be Really attracted to "wrong" bodies, i would preemptively be correctly repulsed, i would never be Really abusive to "wrong" "people," i would preemptive by correctly repulsed by True moral transgression) like. stunning that billions' idea of an encapsulating sendoff for riawin is rian hanging back shit talking winston, being in charge of winston's actually friendly coworker & ABA telling him that being Known to support winston is wrong, obviously no reflection on rian being abusive other than to tell us billions thinks it was a graciously charitable kindness of Attention he didn't deserve, rian then talking to him like aw i'll kind of miss this piece of property i'm throwing out (oh wait i forgot he exists. oh wait yes i'll help you kill him. oh wait i'm not interested in the followup & winston will never get to talk to me about it including when he materializes back into the office once more later) but like it's just:

(cont.) so above & beyond stunning for billions to spell out winston as an Exception in no negative shift in his treatment of her & then saying this treatment has always been "pathetic & slavish" (like........) / this lack of a negative shift in his treatment of her is itself Negative, "truly," rian is just too sentimental towards him as she has been all this time in becoming like the one person whose abusiveness towards him is most varied, most frequent, and most intimate (winston isn't friends or even seatmates with anyone else who does this kind of shit / other kinds of shit, award for rian not being seen physically assaulting winston) like um lol imagine not being Entitled to this woman, hence the "joke" that was winston's crush the whole time which was so actually not relevant that there'd be no reason to assume in s7 he still Particularly "wanted" (boooo hissss, like a woman?? a woman who is a slut??? or empowered if you accept the same premises but suppose a "positive" framing is doing the Opposite in any way that actual threatens the premises, which it doesn't much, which is preferable to analyzing the power dynamics within which people "need" or "want" or "have" sex or don't....don't mind billions' preoccupation with winston's body (with a sexual context) or sex drive (also sexual context. nothing Matter Of Fact about that, it's gross, thanks) or any expression of pursuit of sex with a specific person, so Pathetic as to assume it might not happen b/c that person has agency he doesn't want to steamroll (or can't anyway? like a loser) rather than Knowing He Is Entitled & a girlboss would correctly recognize his Real Man right to have sex with her, why Wouldn't she want to have sex with him anyway? which is a question you can just say to yourself rhetorically as you write that happening for a hollow gesture at [power dynamics?] that goes "well, but of course men need sex, which is simple fact. & women want it, if they're empowered, which is okay" i.e. it is "correct" to assume any given correct woman (all of them, on billions) will fulfill your entitlement to i mean need for sex, ofc it's up to the Wrong kind of men to Not assume as much, or even leverage [negative treatment] to their advantage, just Positive (& neutral) treatment in case a woman is down b/c that's All They Have, like a loser, unlike winners who have their power to leverage. cue mafee getting a pat on the head by wendy about the "aw gee i guess i kind of have a crush but i know it's never gonna go anywhere" like oh pathetic but you get that pat on the head b/c we don't hate you as much as winston, same as the Went Nowhere Fast thread of his liking lauren, well but she's not even single so it's not Necessarily as personal an [of course not?] but like also lol of course not, well but we didn't make sure to laugh at another [never gonna happen] moment in the end. but what else is the point of winston, & we have so much fun Indulging in it, we sure do Want to, & it's an epic fun n games Want & Indulgence when we do it. not when winston does it

tl;dr billions is like "smh winston's a slut for everything" and Lol Lmao the "don't be so fucking needy" b/c his wanting is Needing & our wanting is needing but in a correct way; uh oh is the way billions lashes out at winston a Reflection on the assumptions & actions behind that? that winston is introduced (as supposedly only to appear in that episode) as being too liable to Defensively Lash Out, which is done in a scene where all the other characters are defensively lashing out at him & that was Correct? can you imagine if some characters felt entitled to have various "needs" met & to be able to create negative consequence if they weren't, no, it's the quant we targeted for being autistic & who is irritated about this, & about his boss shitting on him in the meantime, & is daring to Say Anything about it or in general, who is creating such a hassle for everyone & demanding so much with his feelings at any given time. episode WDE really showing how so much of the ultimate fantasy re: winston is to force a mirror up to him (surely the purest power trip is forcing that "nooo, my inferiority, & truly your superiority" despairing acknowledgment Affirmation &/or simply the exercise of superiority i.e. authority that is just doing whatever you want to someone. both happening to winston, they only don't also literally kill him b/c billions just doesn't really do that in general) & but then that episode actually being that clearest mirror to / reflection of billions & its assumptions & perspective & limits it sets in Analyzing Power or anything else & what it even wants to do more generally, whoops! & you know that even if you got a degree of "maybe any of that was out of line in any Real way" it'd be about the victim blaming perspex of [i mean is the real problem Doing Xyz To Anyone or Having Xyz Done To You? (that's right, it's the latter)] like couldn't be done to him if he wasn't a loser anyway, real winners can dictate what can happen to them & do whatever they want, just as we always knew winston was a loser b/c he Might Not have sex w/a woman he likes, & they Might Not (lol. Will not. but he thinks "might not" b/c he's pathetic & Doesn't Get It b/c if he did he'd have been born better or kill himself for not having done so, one supposes) b/c winston is a loser, who can only "want" sex & anything else, vs what other characters "need" to have, like control of his existence & sometimes also taylor's

[suffersinfandom]

Controversial opinion (?): the Kraken Era wasn’t all that dark.

There’s a lot of meta and fic out there that portray Ed as a bloodthirsty, hyperviolent monster, and when that portrayal is challenged, the rebuttal is usually along the lines of, “I’m just doing what canon did. Did you even watch the show? It's racist, not me!”

I did watch the show, and honestly? I went in expecting far worse based on meta and fic I read during the hiatus. When I see people say they didn’t think Ed did enough to redeem himself or that he went past the point of no return, I just don’t understand.

I already went into this in my way-too-long meta about Ed and abuse, but I do think it bears repeating (in a shorter post) because it seems like Ed’s actions -- more than the actions of any other character -- are scrutinized and discussed outside of the context of a comedy about pirates. There’s tons of casual violence in Our Flag Means Death. Sometimes the violence is even funny! 

So what does Ed actually do in the first episodes of season two?

We see Ed directly harm someone twice in the first two episodes: first on the wedding boat, and then when he shoots Izzy in the leg. Kind of unimpressive numbers, yeah? I'd expect more out of a heartbroken Blackbeard.

The first instance involves Ed shooting a man during a raid. That man has a sword through his chest before Ed fires, leading me to believe that Ed’s still following his season one pattern of keeping himself a step removed from murder (technically, the sword killed that guy). We also don’t see the murder happen; the man tumbles offscreen before Ed shoots. This makes the action less brutal. If the writers wanted us to be appalled by Ed’s violence, we would’ve gotten a graphic kill or several.

And the second instance is Izzy. Ed shoots Izzy in the leg after he suggests that the shitty atmosphere is because of Ed’s feelings for Stede. Hot take, maybe, but I don’t think that was entirely out of line. Ed’s feelings for Stede are not the only problem; a significant chunk of the problem is Izzy. Izzy called in the navy and led to their capture. Izzy threatened Ed back into the Blackbeard persona the last time Ed tried to talk things through, and that was without an audience of potential mutineers.

We’re also told that Ed has taken more of Izzy’s toes between seasons. This isn’t cool -- bosses definitely shouldn’t be asking for their employees’ toes -- but there is a precedent for it. In season one, Ed told Stede that he used to feed people their toes for a laugh (yuck). For a laugh. This, to me, implies that it’s not a huge deal. It’s certainly not completely unexpected pirate behavior, and it seems more lenient than a keelhauling or a whipping. I think both of those things would've felt far more gruesome and dark.

As far as violent actions go, that’s not a lot. Like, numerically.

Things get darker in S2E2 when Ed becomes increasingly desperate for someone, anyone, to send him to doggy heaven. He’s unhinged and working his way up to a murder-suicide before he’s stopped. He hacks the wheel right off of the ship and threatens to shoot the mast. He orders Archie and Jim to fight to the death. He ignores anonymous crewmembers as they’re swept overboard in the storm. This is bad! It’s self-destructive and selfish! But it's also tragic and human and understandable.

In my opinion, the worst thing Ed does in these episodes is force his crew to do violence for him -- not because it’s violence (again, they’re pirates), but because the violence hurts them. THIS is what traumatizes them. Their trauma flashbacks are scenes of them hurting others, not of Ed hurting them directly. Ed didn’t physically torture his crew (with the exception of Izzy, and that’s complicated). His crime was driving them to do one violent raid after another, killing and plundering without any joy or theatrics. Ed feels trapped in the role of Blackbeard -- the role that he’s been desperate to escape -- and, in his heartbreak, he opts to trap his crew with him. 

Yes, Ed is messed up in the first two episodes of season two. I don’t blame the crew for almost killing him; it’s what needed to be done. I think that Jim, Archie, Frenchie, and Fang had every right to want Ed gone after Stede’s return. 

But I don’t think that Ed was a super violent monster who tortured his crew and murdered his way through his breakup. He engages in very little onscreen violence, and the person that most of his violence is focused on -- Izzy -- is the same person who told him to be violent. I think that anyone who says that Ed’s actions in the first part of season two are extremely dark is either looking at them out of context, misremembering what actually happened and just recalling the dark tone, or working with some kind of motive.

In conclusion: Ed is a man who, at his very darkest, was still operating pretty firmly within the bounds of "stuff pirates do" (but not stuff Ed has historically done, presumably).

Also look at him. Thank you.

GIF by unearthlydust

EDIT: Read the reblogs for some amazing and more nuanced additions!

[castieltrash1]

the devil has come home → charlie w.

summary → during one of your regular movie nights, charlie asks to take your relationship a step forward

word count → 3.4k

warnings → smut; virgin!charlie x f!reader, oral, literally an entire fic dedicated to charlie eating pussy idk what u want me to say, dirty talk, switch!charlie, established relationship, almost fingering, premature ejaculation, cumming untouched, overstimulation, and hair pulling

a/n → everyone and their mother is in their rory culkin era rn so here u go, whores (affectionate) <3 no but fr i watched scream 4 the other day and knew what i had to do so pls enjoy xoxo

+ bonus points to whoever can figure out the title ;)

---

Charlie shifts beside you, gnawing at his bottom lip to restrain the interruption on the tip of his tongue.

“Did you know,” he suddenly begins, unable to stop himself. “That the school is actually called Ewen High in the book?” On the screen in front of you, a meek Carrie White stumbles through the library in a scene oddly similar to your boyfriend’s own reclusive attitude, and you drag your tired eyes to meet his; wide, with an excited glint reflecting off their pale blue hue. “They renamed it in the adaptation as a nod to Psycho.”

“Really?” you ask, surprised. “I don’t think you’ve told me that one yet.” The comment, while honest, makes Charlie flustered, and he unconsciously shifts closer to the opposite end of the couch. “But I like hearing about all the facts you know,” you reassure his silent insecurity, nuzzling closer. Pressing your lips to his shoulder and kissing the soft cotton sleeve of his shirt, you continue, teasing: “Even if I have heard most of them before.” He groans, but his chest rumbles beneath you with his own restrained amusement.

Peering up at Charlie, you prepare for what is bound to be a lengthy explanation. “So, what, it’s like Norman Bates?” you ask, but Charlie simply nods, mumbling a quiet affirmation under his breath. Already, his eyes are locked back on the television, colorful lights bouncing off his face. It must be his tenth time watching the classic horror film but he stares with the amazement of a first-time viewer, as if he wasn’t rambling about something called a split diopter shot just a few scenes ago.

You can’t help but smile at his quick shift in attention, ultimately content with settling down and letting him focus. As long as a scary movie is playing, you’ll always be the second most important thing in the room to Charlie; a title you hold with pride. Unlike others in his life, his passion doesn’t bother you. In fact, you find yourself admiring his ability to juggle a film studies degree, the leadership position of your college’s cinema club, and weekly series rewatches with the rest of his busy life. Your only complaint would be having to share the small couch in his apartment with Robbie, whose presence makes the already rare mid-movie makeout session completely non-existent. Thankfully, he’s visiting family this weekend, but the lack of a clingy roommate has seemingly had zero effect on Charlie’s inclination to make a move.

So, when your boyfriend awkwardly clears his throat, you quickly tune back in, caught off-guard by the scene unfolding. On-screen is a vivid reminder of the part of your relationship that, up until now, has been virtually unexplored. Despite being unphased during the naked locker room title card, Charlie now fidgets uncomfortably as one of the male characters, whose name you can’t remember, receives a blowjob in his car. The actual act is offscreen, but there’s enough crotch-leveled head bobbing in the camera’s view to surmise what’s happening below the cutoff.

When it comes to anyone else’s sex life, Charlie is as interested as you could expect any newly independent young guy to be. If a couple is getting handsy during a party or other gathering, he’s the one to speak up and tease them about getting a room. When one of your friends unknowingly makes an innuendo, it’s him who laughs, derailing the conversation with some form of that’s what she said joke. Even during the gratuitous nudity scenes popular in his favorite genre, your boyfriend usually pairs his reddened cheeks with a low whistle of appreciation.

Simply put, Charlie is not a prude.

That fact had been what stumped you as your relationship grew, regular milestones coasting by at average speeds. It took three instances of him not reaching under your bra during makeout sessions, happily groping at your chest through two layers of clothes, for you to realize that his personal experience ended abruptly atop second base. Even when it was physically obvious he was ready to move on, Charlie had never mentioned or hinted at continuing, so neither did you. Now, it’s almost as if the glaring depiction of a couple being intimate has finally reminded him how little you two have done.

Thankfully, a bout of bad editing eases the sudden tension. “How is she talking right now?” you snort, referencing the actress’ voiceover poorly edited into the scene. Charlie flinches at your interruption, but you barely notice, too busy jabbing your pointer finger directly at the screen. “She’s still got John Travolta’s dick in her mouth!”

“Billy,” Charlie tensely corrects.

Assuming his tone is just a result of your outburst, you roll your eyes. “Whatever. All I’m saying is you can barely remember how to breathe while giving head, let alone start… I don’t know… monologuing about the girl you hate.” You huff, shaking your head. “Sorry, I won’t interrupt again. Promise,” you apologize, feeling a wave of guilt wash over you when Charlie doesn’t immediately reply. You hadn’t meant to insult him or the movie, but maybe your attempt at a bad joke had fallen short, too personal and poorly timed to do anything more than hurt his feelings.

You start to pull back, intent on apologizing again but are surprised to see Charlie already staring at you. Thinking he’s waiting for your regretful spiel, you start to speak. “I’m s-”

“I want to try,” Charlie says at the same time. The rest of your words suffocate in your hitched breath, offering a subsequent silence that he quickly tries to fill. “Giving you head or, like, e-eating you out, I mean.” The admission makes him swallow heavily, wide eyes unblinking, and you sit there motionless in surprise. When you offer little more than a shaky exhale in response, Charlie squeaks out an excuse. “Not that we - not that you have to or anything, I just…” Regret spreads across his face and you quickly recover, grabbing his shaking hand with yours.

“Okay,” you agree, trying to steady your breathing as the image of Charlie between your thighs flashes through your head.  “Are you sure?” He nods so quickly that you almost blink and miss it.

“I’m definitely sure,” Charlie reassures, squeezing your fingers between his. “A-are you?”

“Definitely,” you echo, already feeling a steady warmth spread across your body. Despite your shared revelation, there’s a long moment where neither of you moves even an inch, hands clasped together as if carved from one marble stone. It isn’t until Charlie’s gaze flickers to your still-parted lips that you take the bait, reeled closer and closer until your mouth meets his.

“Fuck,” Charlie breathes, words becoming a muffled vibration when you press harder, tongue dragging to gather the taste of him. You reach for his hair now, dark waves weaving themselves between each of your fingers, and he lets out a little whimper when you tug, pulling him against you. His grip seems to have no end in sight, blindly reaching at and grasping whatever parts of you he can, fingers meeting your thighs, hips, chest, and neck. His thumbs prop up your chin, giving him the angle to lick needily inside your mouth, and you melt in his grasp, letting him take what he needs.

“Can I…” Charlie leaves a shallow bite mark on your bottom lip, soothing it with a gentle pass of his tongue. His fingers dip to the hem of your shirt now, tips brushing the inside seam. Faintly, you remember he’s never felt you here. He inches back just enough to speak clearly, voice filling the thin space between you. “Y-you can take it off and…” Already, he’s trying to pull the offending garment over your head, and you let go of his hair to help, tossing your shirt to the side the second you can.

Despite your arching into him, Charlie doesn’t immediately kiss you again, lashes fluttering as he stares shamelessly at your exposed skin. Without thinking, you reach back to undo your bra clasp with ease, straps sliding down your arms until they fall off completely. Still amazed by the previous sight, Charlie inhales sharply, pupils blown out with lust as you become barer in front of him.

“Woah…” he finally breathes, fingers tentatively brushing right below your chest. Slowly, his touch inches higher until he gives in, cupping your tits softly. The warmth between your thighs grows as he feels you in ways you’ve only imagined alone at night, eyes squeezed shut and fingers under your panties. “Holy shit.” Each exclamation falls under his breath as if he can’t contain them, commenting only to himself. “Fuck…” His grip tightens, thumbs dragging over your hardening nipples, and you sigh. “You’re so… soft.”  With a grin spreading across his face, Charlie looks to you for reassurance, squeezing harder when you nod and let out a pleased sound. “D-does it feel good?”

“Mhm.” You wonder if he can feel your heart pounding, skipping beats against his hands. “You can be rougher, though,” you tell him, reaching up to lay your palms on the back of his. “I’ll tell you if it hurts, I promise.” Growing more confident from your words, Charlie begins experimenting with different levels of pressure, nails digging into your skin one second and then pinching and tugging at your nipples the next. His breathing grows heavier with each passing moment, and you can’t help the low moans escaping your lips at the feeling of his desperation and the excitement radiating off of him.

And then, without needing any reassurance, Charlie replaces his hands with his mouth, sucking eagerly at every inch of your heaving chest. “S-shit,” you gasp, then let out a breathy laugh. You push some of his long hair back, tucked behind his ears, and smile at the sight of him. His eyes are closed, face red and warm, lips slick with spit as he runs his tongue against the contours of your body. “You’re so good,” you tell him, panting when he moans against you at the praise, the vibration tingling your skin. He wraps his mouth around your nipple before pulling it between his teeth, the sharp sting sending a shiver up your spine.

“I could do this forever,” Charlie lets go to admit, and then, remembering the task at hand, begins to descend lower, kissing and licking down your bare stomach. His hands steady your twitching hips, ticklish as his soft hair brushes your sensitive skin. You continue to whisper praises until he reaches the waistband of your pajama pants and halts. He swallows heavily, the movement of his bobbing throat almost audible above the drone of the television. You blindly reach for the remote and crank down the volume until it plays a low buzz of sound you can barely make out. God help him if your boyfriend gets distracted by a bucket of pig’s blood at a time like this.

“Do I just…” Charlie trails off, unable to vocalize his thoughts. Instead of answering verbally, you lift your hips, fingers meeting his. You drag the elastic past your thighs, letting Charlie pull the rest of the fabric off once it reaches your knees. He stares intently at every inch of your exposed legs, amazed by the sight, as he mindlessly tugs your feet free. It’s only when you start to move, making yourself comfortable against the arm of the couch, that Charlie finally shifts, offering you more space. He moves closer the second he’s able to occupy the emptiness between your legs.

It’s not the most ideal position but if you stop him now, Charlie might lose his boost of confidence in the few seconds it takes to walk down the hall to his room. With one knee pressed against the back of the couch, your opposite leg balancing precariously on the edge of one of the cushions, you spread out as much as you can, offering yourself to Charlie entirely. Even with your whole body on display, his eyes stay locked on one spot: the center of your underwear, where a wet spot is surely visible. You love knowing the only other time he has this look is when one of his favorite films is on.

“Is this good?” you ask, breaking him from his stupor. He blinks, confused. “The position,” you clarify, smiling at the blush that rapidly coats his cheeks.

“Y-yeah, it’s…” Charlie clears his throat, leaning in slowly. “It’s perfect. You are, I mean. You’re perfect,” he whispers, gaze darting from your face to your panties before returning. “I can see it… Does it - do you feel good?” Even with the physical proof, he seems unsure, the tone of his question bordering on disbelief. Before you can find your words, he moves in, shaky fingers meeting the inside of your thighs. “What can I do?” he asks, skin growing redder with desperation. “I-I wanna turn you on more and-”

“Charlie,” you interrupt, propping yourself up on your elbow. “You’re doing so good.” Your amazement thankfully doesn’t embarrass him, and soon enough you feel his warm exhale right where you’ve imagined him so many times before. “I-I’ll probably cum pretty fast,” you tell him, unable to make the desperate confession sound like a tease. “If you want, you can tease me through- fuck,” you gasp, feeling Charlie’s nose bump against your clothed clit, his tongue darting out to tentatively lick at the damp fabric covering you. You whimper something that vaguely sounds like his name when he presses harder, now dragging his tongue over the entirety of your core.

“Charlie,” you repeat breathlessly, grabbing at the hair that frames his face. “T-take them off,��please,” you suddenly find yourself begging, hips arching for more. When lithe fingers brush against you, you almost whine at what is surely an attempt at teasing, but then Charlie is pushing your panties to the side and tentatively sucking at your now exposed cunt. Overwhelmed by the change in sensations, you buck into the feeling, immediately rewarded by the slow drag of Charlie’s tongue circling your clit before lowering to ease inside you. The technique in his actions is not lost on you and you heave in a breath, trying to speak.

“Y-you’ve really n-never?” you squeak out, thighs squeezing around his cheeks when he attempts to shake his head. When he pulls back, you shiver at the feeling of your panties sliding back into place, fabric sticking to your wet skin. Charlie looks up at you shyly, instinctively licking his lips clean of your arousal.

“I’ve… I’ve imagined this a lot,” he whispers, tone rising as he grows more confident. “You don’t know how long I’ve wanted this.”  His cheeks are flushed and his body shakes as he clings to you for support in every form. “I’m just gonna take off your panties and- and I want you to cum, okay? Don’t hold it back or anything, please. I-if you need to hold me in place or move me, just do it. I’ll…” Stunned by his proclamation, you wait in awe for him to finish. “I’ll be good for you, I swear,” he finally promises.

True to his word, Charlie immediately resumes the task at hand, finally tugging your panties completely off and shoving them to the side. Despite the vulnerability of your position, laid bare for him, you can’t stop yourself from bucking your hips when he leans back in. Charlie drags a soothing palm down the inside of your thigh before his mouth is on you again, now slower and more precise. His gaze is focused, flickering between your expression and body, taking in every shift of your features and shiver that runs across you.

He starts by tasting the entirety of you, tongue flattened and firm as it glides against your cunt. He repeats the motion a few times, letting you grind onto him until you both build a steady rhythm. It’s not enough to make you cum, but it isn’t meant to be; a consistent sensation that keeps you wanting more, without unbearably teasing you. That comes when Charlie begins to flick his tongue against your clit, so quickly and effortlessly that it takes your breath away. A litany of sounds escapes you as he dedicates all of his attention to your most sensitive spot, torturing it endlessly. His own moans only add to the sensation, a low vibration that seems to trail up the rest of your body, filling your head with a rhythmic buzz.

“Fuck,” you gasp, vision blurring and thighs trembling as Charlie replaces his tongue with his thumb, calloused skin circling your clit in a steady motion. With his mouth free, and between quick inhales, he starts to speak again.

“You taste so good,” he says, the vulgarity of his words no longer seeming to phase him. He rubs harder, faster, and his breathing hastens. “I-I want you to cum on my tongue, please?” His question sounds more like a plea, especially with the way he seems to pant around each word. “I’m gonna keep licking h-here, okay?” he asks, thumb dragging lower until the tip sinks into you with ease. Both of you still, the motion propelling the room into complete silence. Charlie lets a bit more of his thumb push into you before he pulls back completely, shakily exhaling. “It… You’re so warm,” he remarks, staring intently at where the arousal slowly drips from you. Like a moth to a flame, his mouth returns, messily licking clean your wetness.

You cry out his name, tugging on his hair so harshly you know it must hurt, but he doesn’t relent. Your hips buck and you grind your clit against his firm thumb, his tongue pressing inside you just as the thick digit had moments prior. Your mantra is only quietened by the sound of Charlie’s, a muffled please, please, please mouthed against your core that has you spiraling, desperation mirroring his. A quick glance shows you that while his head and hands are focused, the rest of his body is uncontrolled as he ruts against the sofa, so turned on he can’t help but chase release.

The sharp edge of your own impending orgasm hits you so hard it seems to isolate the rest of your senses, body and mind falling into an endless abyss with only Charlie’s touch anchoring you to the present. His incessant effort to satisfy himself with your pleasure intensifies everything until you find yourself succumbing to his ultimate desire. A broken admission falls from your lips as you cum on his tongue, neverending high propelled as his licking and rubbing only grow in speed and desperation. Even after you’ve stopped grinding against him, Charlie tastes you like it’s his last chance, his hips bucking wildly into the cushion below. He eventually slows, but his tongue doesn’t stop, and you’re too overwhelmed to realize what’s happened.

It takes you whimpering from overstimulation and pulling Charlie back by his hair to make him stop, his mouth chasing you even after you’ve pressed your trembling thighs together, knees digging into his heaving chest. After a few seconds, he seems to blink back some clarity, swallowing heavily and shifting back awkwardly, cheeks flushed bright red. “Charlie?” you breathe, shakily pushing yourself into a sitting position. “Are you - oh.” Despite his quick maneuvering, the new angle allows you to see the slowly spreading wet spot at the front of his jeans.

“I-I’m so sorry,” Charlie squeaks out, trying to yank himself from the couch. “Let me just - fuck, uh - go to the bathroom or something and…” When he tries to cover his crotch with his hands, you bat them away, immediately reaching for the zipper and button on his pants. “W-what are you doing?” he asks but doesn’t stop you, even when you ease his sensitive and spent cock out from his stained underwear. His expression is pure shame as he quickly hardens in your grasp, hips bucking to escape the overstimulation of your fingers wrapped around him.

“Let me return the favor,” you tell him, tilting your head softly in silent questioning. He must only think of the wetness of your mouth on him since his blush deepens, cock twitching against your slick palm. You stroke him slowly and softly until he stutters out a yes, which you reply to with a widening grin, unknowing that he’s imagined this moment more than you could ever guess.

You lean down with a teasing imitation of his previous word and Charlie suddenly feels all of his wet dreams come true.

“I want you to cum on my tongue, okay?”

[thewertsearch]

TG: only trolls say theyre six i dont know whats up with you and that dumb fake age […] AA: i am 6 sweeps old one sweep is a little more than 2 years you dummy!

She’s still so chipper, and I love it. We haven't seen this side of Aradia since way back in the FLARP arc, shortly before she died. It really contributes to the sense that she's been reborn.

TG: im gonna shut off my phone now cya AA: yes AA: thats definitely what you did the first time we had this conversation

Dream bubble it is.

Jade showed up here because her dream self is dead - but as far as we know, Dream Dave is perfectly fine. Did Jack do another murder offscreen?

TG: oh sup TG: looks like youre a fairy AA: yeah TG: thats cool

TG: this wasnt the suit i was wearing

TG: it was this ugly fucking rag […] TG: and i went to take a nap TG: terezi said id reach god tier TG: or i guess show me why i wouldnt

Oh, it’s that Dave! I’d assumed he'd been completely written out of the story when Jack slit his throat and ruined Terezi's day.

So these bubbles also collect the ghosts of non-Alpha versions of the characters, provided they died in the Alpha Timeline. We might also be meeting the Dave who was killed by DD - and I'm sure there's a bubble somewhere just filled to the brim with Aradiabots.

TG: then this isnt a memory or a dream at all […] AA: it is the afterlife AA: but what is happening now is taking place in a bubble which is accessible to the living through dreams under the right conditions […] AA: the entry point for any bubble is always a memory

So from now on, every flashback could potentially mutate into a dream bubble - but at the same time, everything we see before the mutation is an actual memory, that really happened. It's incredibly convoluted, and I am totally here for it.

[kylejsugarman]

like walt obviously never wanted to or tried to focus on his cancer as a disease, it just became a nebulous entity that was in turns an impetus to Get what he Wanted and an exit sign, and thus was never a huge component of his jesse/business-facing identity, but it’s so excruciatingly clear that the cancer as a disease WAS a big part of his identity to jesse. walt worried about people perceiving him as withered and diseased, but jesse perceived him the complete opposite way and transitioned to that “digital short about making a meth comic” hero worship state of walt partially because of his cancer. jesse not only has a well documented affinity for protecting the vulnerable (and like it or not, cancer is an inherently vulnerable disease), he has an early established personal connection with cancer thru his late aunt ginny. his and ginny’s relationship is a story told almost exclusively through offscreen events and visual or conversational cues, but that just makes it all the more wrenching because this story falls into place in near perfect tandem with the show’s deepening and softening of jesse’s character. we realize that he’s a loving, insecure, vulnerable person just as we’re also piecing together that he lived for years with this woman who loved him as he Was and who he cared for devotedly until she died. her things remain in her house untouched; when he invokes her name, there’s an unusual degree of reverence to it that we don’t typically see with jesse. he clearly still reveres ginny and those emotions transfer to walt as soon as jesse learns about his cancer diagnosis. that protective instinct emerges, that sense of urgency returns. when walt says that his cancer is stage 3a, jesse unconsciously mumbles “in ur lymph nodes”—not a fact u would expect him to just know offhand. jesse knows this from his time with ginny and in that line—the quietness of it, the impulsivity of it—we see that jesse is thinking about Time. realizing how little of it walt must have left if it’s in his lymph nodes. and so he submits. jesse submits and follows his protective instinct despite the harm it leads him to because he wants to buy walt more time. walt and ginny have become inextricably linked in his mind and when walt dispenses those rare bits of affection and approval, those links only grow stronger. we see all these newly uncovered parts of jesse—the part of him that cares deeply for the vulnerable, the part of him that needs validation from a parental figure, the part of him that is no longer there following ginny’s death—bending to accommodate a generous perspective of walt as a sort of hero who is fighting cancer and graciously allowing jesse to fight by his side for a greater good. and if jesse can reach the bar that walt has set for him, if he can just do what he’s told and chase walt’s approval, maybe he can earn them that victory and save walt from what happened to ginny. i just think that if ginny weren’t a part of this equation, we wouldn’t have gotten the walt and jesse relationship we got. in any case, we certainly wouldn’t have gotten jesse lovingly drawing and inking a literal comic book superhero version of walt and their adventures.

[blueskyscribe]

In my opinion Season 3 is easily the worst season of Earthspark.

It's thematically incohesive (don't trust Decepticons, but also Prowl is a prick for not warming up to Megatron immediately), Optimus is unlikeable and bitchy, Thrash's only character trait is cowardice like he's Scooby Doo or something, no good resolution for Starscream, Breakdown and Bee's friendship is broken up because ?????, the Quintessons are impersonal, unengaging enemies compared to the Decepticons (who just jet into space, bye), and a lot of parts are just really boring. (The Fairmaestro episode and the movie night episode being the biggest offenders.)

There were scenes I liked in Season 3, moments I liked, and I liked Prowl. But overall this season was hit by Ultra Magnus' Cloak Syndrome.

You know how in Netflix's War for Cybertron series Ultra Magnus goes on his own to parlay with Megatron? And he's wearing a Mysterious Cloak? And you could tell the writers were biting their lips thinking about the epic moment when it was revealed to be Magnus? But it's undercut by the reality that Transformers have very distinct sizes, colors, and silhouettes, so it's complete unbelievable that even a single Decepticon would wonder whose giant shoulder stacks those were?

Yeah, that's how I feel about Season 3 Earthspark. And just Earthspark in general tbh. We don't get a natural story driven by who the characters are. The characters live in service to story beats, whether they make sense or not.

The writers were like "It would be dramatic if Breakdown chose the Decepticons over Bee. So let's have him do that." No setup, no instances or flashbacks of Shockwave or Soundwave saving Breakdown's life or bonding moments with other 'Cons or anything to show why Breakdown would pick them over Bumblebee, who he has risked his life for before.

The writers were like "It would be cool to have a scene where Optimus and Megatron reconcile! So we'll start off this season with Optimus being mad at Megatron." No reason for it; he's just mad so that later, like the Maltos, we can clap our hands when it gets resolved.

By contrast look at the Beast Wars episode "Gorilla Warfare".

BW Dinobot scoffs at Optimus Primal's gentle and curious nature as he studies a flower. Later when Primal gets infected with a "go apeshit" virus, Dinobot is like "Well I'm sorry for the guy but this strategically good, his anger will win us the war." But then Primal's blind rage nearly gets him killed and Dinobot realizes how much the Maximals depend on not just Optimus' strength, but his calm wisdom.

The episode ends with Dinobot sitting by Primal's bed, waiting for him to wake up so he can tell Primal he's glad he's back to normal, and Dinobot leaves the flower from the start of the episode by his bedside as an oblique apology. THAT was a conflict that made sense, that arose from the core of who the characters were, and that was resolved based on a character's growth. And it all happened in a half-hour!

Like some of these ideas in Earthspark WOULD work if they were fleshed out . . . I could imagine Breakdown having a bond with other Decepticons and really caring for them; sure, I can write my own fanfic. But if I'm watching a TV show and it's a Big Plot Point then it is the job of the writers to show me that, on the screen. I shouldn't have to be filling in their lack of storytelling with "uh maybe offscreen--" and "what if--".

[pvtameliatucker]

okay but I'm not seeing people really go into the DETAILS of Buck and Natalia breaking up. Like think about it.

This man avoided his own loft and ignored any communication from Taylor, knowing the relationship was at its end. He avoided that confrontation and Eddie wasn't only just privy to it, HE WAS SITTING FRONT ROW to that shit show. But with Natalia?

Natalia, it's clear, that BUCK dumped HER. And it was such a non-issue to him, that not only did it happen completely offscreen, but he didn't lament to Eddie about it at all. And in the discussion we DO get, he's fine. He's actually fine, not just plastering on a smile to skate by the feelings. THAT IS SUCH PROGRESS.

And I see people talking about the Eddie of it all, where when Marisol leaves, Buck will step up to stay But. BUT. I don't see ANYONE mentioning that this is the first time Buck ended his relationship before Eddie ended his, storytelling-wise. When Ali broke up with Buck, Eddie's ended first because Shannon asked for a divorce and then passed away. Eddie broke up with Ana first and then Buck broke up with Taylor. People are noticing that when one starts dating, so does the other, but I never see them noticing the ORDER of who does what first either starting or stopping their relationships.

So I think its such a great small detail to show Buck's growth that not only did he have a breakup (one he initiated) but he had one that was so Uninvolved to his emotional problems that it happened where an audience wasn't needed, and that he was able to do so without the fear of being left behind by Eddie. Because it seems like his other relationships he took cues from Eddie to see if he would wind up being alone, but now he's gradually accepting that, no, even if Eddie isn't Available for him, he's still available. Whether it's a romantic buddie speculation or platonic.

Idk, I think I'm rambling because my thoughts go zipping around, but all I'm really saying is, I'm so happy Buck has this personal progression that doesn't need a Front and Center this time. He gets to have peace with himself when having that decision, which he rarely gets.

[welcometothejianghu]

Welcome to another round of W2 Tells You What You Should See, where W2 (me) tries to sell you (you) on something you should be watching. Today's choice: 致命游戏 / The Spirealm.

The Spirealm is a 2024 drama about two young men who fall in love while basically playing a whole bunch of horror-themed escape rooms that can for-real kill you.

This show/book combo has gripped my entire ass. The second I knew I wanted to watch this, almost immediately after it started airing, I muted the tag. I was so right to do this, because this is worth not spoiling yourself about. If you are a Guardian fan in particular, you owe it to yourself to watch this for reasons I think will become clear as you go about watching it.

So! If all you need to know is that I think you need this show in your life, great! You don't even need to scroll down to the end of the post for the links; go to Viki and press play. In case you need more convincing than that, though, I'm going to give you here five reasons to watch it that are as spoilerless as I can make them.

Before we start, though, I'm going to take a moment to note that I had to torrent the video files so I could make screenshots of my own, and if I hadn't, this would have been a much uglier rec post than the others I've done. Not only were there not many promotional materials or official stills released, the show itself barely stayed up two hours on iQiyi, and that's because this drama is a...

1. (Barely) Censored Adaptation Of Same-sex Original Work

Ah, you know that MyDramaList tag well, don't you? Yeah, the original novel, Kaleidoscope of Death (which has a rec post of its own!), is supernatural story about grief and loss built on the love story between the two male leads. Now of course you know already that a mainstream Chinese television adaptation of something like that is going to straighten up everything and turn the horror romance into the sci-fi platonic love of besties.

...But damn, folks, it's still real gay.

Ling Jiushi, the sweet-faced newbie, is a canonical virgin and loving cat dad who plays the mysterious video game once, then finds himself suddenly able to enter the game worlds bodily -- and of course, if you die in the game, you die in real life. He's pretty much doomed, until he meets...

Ruan Lanzhu, the cool-as-a-cucumber veteran of the door worlds, who falls pretty much immediately for the completely oblivious Ling Jiushi, then has to spend the rest of the series consumed with lust while trying to keep him and a couple other dipshits alive.

The show preserves so many overtly gay beats and declarations of affection from the novel, to the point where it's just this side of suggesting that the romance is actually, textually happening just offscreen, every time the camera cuts away. I am forever grateful that working with Zhu Yilong on Reunion seems to have perfected sweet baby Junjie's ability to look at a man with nothing but love in his eyes.

I adore so much the dynamic they have, one where a man who has never told the truth a day in his life encounters a man so sincere and naive that you cannot seduce him with anything but absolute honesty or he's never going to get it.

There are three (3) separate door worlds where they share a bed, and in every one of them, they both sleep with their shoes on. Like the absolute freaks they both are.

2. It's puzzle solvin' time!

So if you've read some of my rec posts before, you know that I am critical of stories that center around cases that are unfollowable, uninteresting, or both (e.g., Mysterious Lotus Casebook and White Cat Legend). I am therefore thrilled to tell you that the door worlds are actually (largely) thoughtful mysteries with reasonable solutions, where you care about what's happening and why.

The way each door world is set up is that you have to solve the puzzle to find a key and unlock the door that will let you leave. One of the challenges is each world's door ghost, who has the key and does not want to give it up. The other challenge is the world-specific set of taboo conditions, where violating them means the door ghost can kill you -- and you are not always told what those taboo conditions are. That means that solving a door involves 1) figuring out what will insta-kill you, 2) not doing that, 3) finding where the hell the exit door is, 4) placating and/or scamming the door ghost long enough to snatch the key from them, and 5) running like hell to the exit door with that key before the door ghost fucks you up about it.

As the show goes on, you get introduced to the concept of door-passing shepherds, which are experienced door-finishers who take through lower-level players, building them up in the process. A lot of these shepherds work for organizations, such as the one Ruan Lanzhu runs. And a lot of them are ready to reach the exit by climbing over everyone else's corpses.

That's part of the fun of the setup: You're not just thrown in alone. You show up with a random number of other players, some with very different levels of experience. At least one of you will make it out; not everyone will. So you can add a step 6) to the list above, which is: surviving all the other players who will gleefully stab you in the back in order to be the first player out the door.

The door worlds are also lovely. They all feel like sets -- and I know that's a weird thing to say about places that are literal sets, but they manage it feel it even on film. In fact, even the show's uses of clunky-ass greenscreen feel appropriate, because of how unreal everything is supposed to be. Everything looks like a dream, which is only amplified by how beautifully everything's shot.

(What's that you say? You say the guy who directed this was the editor on Infernal Affairs? No kidding.)

From a fandom perspective, what's great here is that even though there are technically just twelve doors, there are canonically way more than twelve door worlds out there. That means that whatever worlds you want to create are valid. The best pieces of fanfic I've read are the ones that dream up their own door worlds, complete with taboo conditions, key puzzles, and world-specific perks that lead to gay sex, because come on.

3. A good middle ground of horror

So at this point you are perhaps wondering: How scary is it?

And the answer is, kind of as scary as you're willing to let your mind go with it. Everything has been science-fictioned real hard, including the video game premise that "explains" what's happening with these doors. It relies on dread way more than jumpscares. The blood/gore/gross content is extremely low, again on account of Chinese content censorship. Most icky things are done with offscreen sounds and shadows. I'm pretty squeamish about pain and injury, and I can't recall a time I had to look too long away from the screen.

However, that means the show works some real conceptual horror. That picture up there is of a man forcing three young girls to hold raw eggs unbroken in their mouths. There's nothing about that image that's not technically G-rated, and it's awful in context.

The best bits are when the monsters don't need a lick of CG to become horrors. They cast a contortionist in the Waverly Hills door world, and she absolutely earned her keep.

I have a lot of critiques about how the show handles things, especially in terms of defanging the horror elements (which it does), but one thing I think it absolutely gets right is that it understands that ghost stories are first and foremost tragedies. That's a thing I've always liked about Asian horror in particular, how often you wind up siding with the ghost. Yes, sure, she tried to strangle you with her hair, but have you ever considered she's the real victim here? There's always a bit of a calculus: Can you negotiate with the door ghost, or do you just need to stab them and run? The Spirealm prefers negotiation, and frankly, so do I.

So yeah, it's about as scary as you let it be. If your horror tolerance is low, watch it in a well-lit room and focus on the unreality of it, and you'll be okay. If you're looking for something genuinely spooky, spend some time thinking about the existential dread of the entire situation, and that'll be good for a couple good spine tingles.

4. The Obsidian Family (& Friends!)

In a show where death is always an option, you have to have characters where you actually care if they live or die. Fortunately, all your allies are charming and loveable enough that you are going to be real upset every time they get put in danger!

Obsidian is one of the organizations I mentioned earlier. It's run by Ruan Lanzhu, and it includes a cool and collected doctor, a mom friend who cooks for everybody, a guy who's maybe not having the best mental health day of his life, and two identical twins who could not be more different if they tried. They all live in the same amazing big fancy house, which is where Ling Jiushi too goes to live when he joins the group. They have big family meals, they look after one another, they hang out together -- I mean, if this is the kind of setup you love, then you will love this setup.

There are also plenty of allies who aren't technically part of Obsidian, but who are our friends nonetheless, and who come over to hang out in the Obsidian house from time to time. Some of them are rivals turned friends, some of them are clients turned friends, and some of them were just friends all along! Surely nothing bad will happen to any of them, and they'll all live happily ever after, right? ...Right?

5. Toast and Chestnut!

Of course, the true heroes of the show are Toast the Corgi and Chestnut the Kitty.

Animals are so good.

Truly, I love that one of Ling Jiushi's defining characteristics is that he is a Cat Dad. He is a simple man with simple needs, and one of those needs is to pet his kitty or he'll explode.

caveat: Some thoroughly bad adaptation choices

Yeah, so I keep talking about the novel (and talk even more about the novel in its own rec post), but I assure you, you don't need to have read the novel to feel the degree to which this is an adaptation -- and one that's had its rough, nasty, spooky, gay edges all sanded off in the desperate hope of ever seeing daylight.

Now, sometimes I consider batshit nonsense janky creative decisions to be a selling point for a show (see: Mysterious Lotus Casebook, Legend of Fei, Sand Sea)! In this case, however, I'm going to have to take points off for how incoherently bad they are here. We're talking Psych-Hunter levels of Why Would You Do That-- and the answer, as always, comes down to how you write around what censorship won't allow on television.

The novel says the doors are supernatural. The show says they're a virtual-reality computer game. Now, on the surface, this move sort of makes sense -- you can't have ghosts, but you can have computer games that make digital ghosts, which, sure, okay. But then the problem quickly becomes that the plot of the novel is not remotely built to support a sci-fi premise, so a lot of things have to be grafted awkwardly on. Like, say, a bad guy who stole his corporate logo from Even Worse Twitter. Or a game-designing bestie whose face is never seen. Or [late-stage spoilers about a major character].

The eventual explanation is that this whole setup is a righteous and good game that has somehow been corrupted by evil game-designing capitalists from the West, and that's why it can abduct you in broad daylight and kill you if you fail it. There are good people who want to purify (???) the game, and evil people who want to make money off the game. And I don't mind spoiling you for that part, because it's garbage nonsense. You will be deeply unsatisfied with the show's half-assed attempt at resolving it all. (You may, however, have that disappointment tempered with the amazing concurrent display of heterosexuality that is apologizing to your best bro by coding his perfect man for him. The Spirealm is a land of contrasts.)

Look, I consider myself a mild to moderate socialist, and even I was yawning and making jerk-off motions every time someone started to wax halfheartedly poetic about how evil American capitalism is. Like, yeah, but not because some college student made a vile and wretched video game that eats people! This show is a critique of capitalism like a five-year-old crying because he doesn't get ice cream before bed is a critique of authoritarianism.

And even this, I can't be too mad at it about, you know? I just assume that this was some absolute Hail Mary attempt at getting past censorship -- you know, maybe if we make all the right "grr, USA bad!" noises, they'll let our gay ghost story slip by? And it worked! I mean, just barely, but it did.

So yeah, fair warning that the Spirealm is a show that, if you love it (and I do), you will have to love despite some glaring flaws that haunt it all the way through and hit especially hard during what should otherwise have been an amazing endgame. But hey, we're c-drama fans! We're good at loving janky things, right?

Want to enter the World of Doors?

As I said at the start of the post, Viki's got it -- and only Viki. I'm not sure what circumstances got it up on Viki after iQiyi pulled it, but I'm glad. Watch it quick, before Viki changes its mind!

Hug him! Hug that boy!

[onlyyvette]

https://www.tumblr.com/onlyyvette/721599754465886208/brothers-and-undateables-finding-out-hard

Im so sorry if I must have gotten confused but if your still up for making it I would totally be fine if you make it a femdom or whatever you would feel comfortable with

Sex Tape

Warnings: sub/bottom character + dom/top reader + femdom!mc + hard dom reader + rough sex + slightly animalistic behavior + heavy degradation + spanking + collars + pegging + filming sex+ mommy kink + overstimulation + dumbification + he gets fucked silly and absolutely loves it + Diavolo is such a masochist + your sex tape gets released!!! + it's alright tho because you guys were already planning on uploading it and getting money from it

Word Count: 3565

A/N: It's alright I'm sure everyone mistakes<3

Also thank you sm for sending this request in, I've been wanting to write something absolutely filthy and this is the perfect scenario

"OMFG--" Levi came running out of his room and into the dining hall where Beel, Belphie, and Satan were sitting at. "You guys! You won't believe what happened! [name] and Diavolo are in a relationship! AND THEIR SEX TAPE GOT RELEASED!!" Lev's shrill voice echoed in the dining hall but all three of the other brother's eyes widened.

"What--what do you mean, [name] and Diavolo's sex tape got released?" Satan was the first to talk, though he still didn't believe what he was hearing. "Look, it's right here! Levi shoves his laptop in Satan's face and Satan pushes it back, annoyed at Levi's rudeness. Still, he looked at the screen and sure enough, there you were in only underwear while Diavolo was sitting on a large bed completely naked.

"Okay, time to make sure this is working..." you fidgeted with the camera a bit, finally getting it to where you wanted it. "There! Stay on the bed," you turned to the demon sitting on your bed as he nodded once. Diavolo stayed there kneeling with his hands fidgeting in front of him. He was already fully hard, despite seemingly not have being touched at all yet. "Good. Now keep your hands off your body. I know, it's a hard task for a slut like you but I'm sure you'll manage," you said simply as you walked offscreen. He whined at the harsh name but it was clear that it was turning him on.

You came back with a few items: Some flavored lube, a spiky black collar and leash, and a very large red dildo. "Come here," you commanded as you waited for Diavolo at the edge of the bed. He quickly scrambled to you and bared his neck for you, like you had done this many times.

You wrap the collar around Diavolo's neck and fasten it tightly so he can feel it dig into his skin, just how he likes it. He lets out a small moan as he rubs the collar decorating his neck. "[name], I--"

"Levi," Satan said, clearing his throat. He had an obvious blush forming on his face despite his scowl. "I get it, this is crazy but do you have to show your brothers porn in the dining hall?" Levi had been entranced by the video but his head finally snapped up and looked at his brothers. Belphie was struggling to hold in his laugh while Beel was blushing furiously, trying to look at anything else besides the video.

"Fine, fine, I get it. But I'm sending the video to gc!" Levi scurries off to his room in a hurry and locks the door behind him. He sits down on the floor and sends the video the the group chat and resumes the video, feeling tension in his pants.

"[name], i-it's tight..." Diavolo whines, tugging at his collar. You slap his hand away and roughly grip his face. "Weren't you the one who was begging for me to make it tight earlier? Don't ask for what you can't handle, slut," you sneered, letting go of his face. Diavolo nodded and sat back on his knees, awaiting your next order.

"Now hold still and let me put on the leash." You took the leash in your hand and clipped to his collar. "There. Now you look like a proper whore. You like it?" you tilted your head a bit. "Yes! Yes, I love it!" Diavolo's eyes were already starting to cloud over at the thought of being your personal whore. "Good. Now face the camera."

Diavolo quickly turned his body to face the camera, his blush getting even darker once realization that people might actually see this settled in. "Now, you're going to ride this dildo," you say, placing the toy in his lap. "Since you're already prepped, just put lube on the dildo." you throw the lube next to him. Diavolo uncaps the lube and squirts it into his hand. He begins to lube up the toy in front of him, slowly making his way up and down the shaft, as if he were lubing up a real dick.

As Diavolo applies the lube, he can feel his mouth water as he eyes the dildo. It was huge, about 9--no, 10 inches. The dildo was studded with rounded ridges that he knows is going to stimulate his hole like nothing else. He begins to pant, thinking about how good it would feel pressing into him and stretching his soft walls out, rubbing against his prostate relentlessly, fucking into him so deep...

"Are you just going to eye-fuck that dildo or are you going to ride it because I'm getting impatient," you roll your eyes. "Also, clean up that drool. I know you're an eager slut but you don't have to be so obvious." Diavolo quickly wiped the drool on his chin, shame coursing through his body at how obvious his lewd eagerness was. He took one hand away from the dildo to steady himself and brought his hips up to the tip of the toy.

"Look at the camera," you reminded him. Shivering, Diavolo raised his head up to look at the camera. He takes a few breaths, his body trembling a bit as he anticipates the dildo entering him. Finally, he pushes the dildo into his hole. "Mhngghh!" Diavolo whimpered as the first two inches of the toy pushed into him. Already he could feel the large head and ridges stimulating him and he hadn't even gotten a full third of it in him. Eyebrows scrunching up as he gritted his teeth, Diavolo continues to push himself down the toy's length, needy and breathless moans escaping him.

He had only gotten himself half-way down the dildo when you suddenly grabbed his hips and pushed him down the rest of the way. "W-wai---Ungghh! Haahhn, nghhHH!" Diavolo's eyes widen as he's pushed down the rest of the length, punched out moans forcing their way out of him. His eyes water at feeling of all those ridges pressing into him, how full he felt. "Why...nhh, did you do that?" Diavolo whines as he turns to face you. His eyes are wet with tears, his lip trembling as he looks at you with the most adorable eyes. "Just because, if I'll be honest," you shrugged. "Besides, your body is mine." You roughly grab his jaw. "I can do whatev.er I want with it. Am I wrong?"

Diavolo shakes his head rapidly. "N-no! No, my body is yours to do whatever you want with it," he says weakly. "You forgot something," you said expectantly. "My body is yours Mommy..." he whispered, his tears getting close to falling. You lick your lips at the sight of his tears, how weak they made him look and let go of his jaw, pushing his head back to face the camera again.

"The camera is still recording... Go on." you motioned to the toy when Diavolo hadn't understand what you meant at first. He raises his hips up the dildo, until only the tip is still inside him. He sinks down on the dildo, taking it completely down to the base. "Ohhh...nghh." Diavolo let's out sinful whines as he takes the dildo back into him. "Oh! And remember not to cum," you reminded him, breaking your silence. Diavolo nods quickly and begins to ride the dildo, setting a steady pace.

"Unnghh! Hahhh, mhnn..." Diavolo rides the toy with trembling thighs, letting out sinful whines. As he lifts himself up and down the toy's length, he can't help but let his mind wander. Every time the toy bottoms out, he can truly feel the shape of the toy inside of him. The ridges stimulated his walls so good, especially when the rubbed against his prostate, causing him to let out an occasional yelp and choked sob. And the length and girth of the dildo were so satisfying too. The dildo reached so deep inside of his hole and stretched him out so much that it felt like his hole would form itself to the shape of the dildo. What if the toy was a few inches longer and had a thicker girth. And what if the ridges were bigger and just the tiniest bit sharper? Maybe it'd be so big that it wouldn't even fully fit inside him yet split him open...

"Okay, that's enough," you finally spoke up. "It's barely been 10 minutes and you're already becoming so braindead..." You waited for Diavolo to stop riding the toy but his movements never stopped. His eyes were glazed over and he had a dumb look on his face, his mouth open and he was panting heavily. Clearly, he didn't understand what you were saying. With a deep sigh, you move closer to Diavolo. You pick up the leash connecting to his collar, and yank on it, roughly enough to pull Diavolo's head back to you. "Ghhk--" Diavolo's eyes widen as he's taken off guard, pawing at the collar as it restricts his breathing.

"I told you to stop, didn't I?" you asked in a cool tone. You seemed unbothered but Diavolo knew better. "Ghnn, I-I'm so-o-rry, mhnghk--Mommy!" Diavolo chokes out. "Yeah, I bet you're sorry, huh? Guess it only shows how much of a desperate bitch you are. Can't even listen when you're told to stop moving." you sneer into his ear, tugging on the leash even harder. Diavolo's eyes roll back into his skull as waves of pleasure crash into him. The dildo is still inside of him, nearly it's entire length still shoved up his guts. The stimulation from the toy added to the choking sensation from the collar and your harsh words are almost enough to bring him the verge and...

"U-ughhnn, ghhkk, M-momm--ngGHH!" Diavolo cums hard, his back arching into you as he lets out strangled moans. His cum spurts onto his ample chest, some of it even reaching his neck. His jaw goes slack as he rides out the aftershocks of his intense orgasm. Right as he begins to relax, he's immediately pulled back by the sharp tug of your leash.

"So you came, huh," you said matter-of-factly. "H-huh...---!" Diavolo's eyes widened as he realized he had messed up. Terribly. "I-I'm sorry Mommy! I'm so sorry, I don't know what came over me and---" Diavolo scrambles to make excuses and frankly, you didn't care to hear them.

"Shut up." Diavolo quiets down immediately once he hears your command. He can't think of anything he can say or do to make you less angry at him so he decides to stay silent. "You came without permission, without me even touching you. You really are just a dumb slut. A masochistic whore that only thinks about his own pleasure, right?" Your words drip venom as you speak, your eyes narrowing in contempt. Diavolo squirms at your harsh words, the pleasure going straight to his dick but he doesn't dare show you how turned on he is. Instead, he continues to look at you with his sad puppy eyes, still trying to be go you for forgiveness. "I asked you a question."

"...Yes, Mommy. I-I'm a whore," Diavolo says his voice quaking. "A slut that only thinks about himself. I'm so sorry," he continues to apologize. "I don't care for your apologies. Besides, your performance showed me that I should have just taken care of this from the beginning. Sit up," Diavolo reluctantly follows your order. Just as he raises up the dildo, you hold it's base and yank it out of his hole. "HaaAAHN!" Diavolo let's out a loud moan at the feeling of the dildo being ripped out of him, the rough feeling of the toy's ridges dragging along the walls had him spasming, almost making him cum a second time.

"Well, you know what they say," you sigh deeply before reaching for something offscreen, taking out a harness. "Sometimes, it's better to do something yourself. Lay down and keep you ass up," you instruct as you attach the dildo to the harness and fit it onto you. Diavolo is quick to follow your orders, crawling a little bit further and getting into position, bringing his torso down to the bed and lifting his plump ass into the air. He looks into the camera and whines lowly, realizing how pathetic he looked. Yet it still got him so hot and bothered. He squirmed a bit, panting lightly as he waits for you to finally make your move.

You kneeled behind Diavolo and pressed one finger into his hole. "Hmm..." Diavolo sighs sensually as he feels you finger prodding his insides. "The dildo should have left you loose, but you're still clenching on my finger. You really love dick, huh?" you say disdainfully as you add a second finger. "Ah! Nnh, y-yes! I love it," Diavolo moans as he moves his body back against your digits.

"Okay, enough of that," you say as you pull your fingers out abruptly. "N-no! Please, I want more," Diavolo whined as he mourns the loss of your fingers. He begins to push himself up but you place your hand on his back and slam him back into the bed. Once Diavolo was taken off guard, you land a heavy slap on his ass. "MhhnNN!" His eyes widen at the sting of your hand. "You already know to not disobey me Diavolo." Your eyes narrow. "You've already went against my orders twice, so I think its time for you to be disciplined." You end your sentence with another slap tho Diavolo's ass, causing him to let out another moan.

Under normal circumstances, you would have given him a number to count to and you'd spank for each number. This time, Diavolo had especially pissed you off, causing you to just spank him uncoordinatedly, Diavolo being forced to just take it like a good slut. "Ah...hnngh...ghhk...nnh! Mommy..." Diavolo whimpers with each slap like a cheap whore, his hard dick beginning to leak again. You don't answer him and and continue to deliver your punishment. Diavolo's hands grip tightly at the bed sheets as his tears fall freely, soaking the sheets under him a bit. His eyes unfocus with every hit and he lets and broken sobs, knowing that he's going to break very soon.

Right at your eleventh spank, you put all your force into your hit, leaving a dark print on his ass. At the same time, you grab his cock tightly, getting the feeling that he might cum from that last smack. Your intuition was spot on, Diavolo seizing up with a loud cry as his orgasm gets cut off. "This was a punishment. You really think I'd let you cum?" you removed your hand from his dick and began to slick up the dildo. Diavolo was still shuddering from the feeling of his orgasm being cut off. He's still in the same position, his now red ass still up in the air despite how much his legs trembled.

"Hey, get up," you yanked at the leash connecting to Diavolo's collar, bringing his body flush to your front as he grabs the collar trying his best not to choke. "Now, look at the camera," you turn his head to make him face the camera. "Good. Now keep your eyes there..." Diavolo follows your orders and keeps his focus on the lens of the camera. He probably looked like a 2-cent whore right about now. He could feel the tears falling down his heated cheeks and he didn't even have to look down to know his dick was still very hard and leaking. And the stinging on his backside...you hadn't even properly fucked him yet he already looked wrecked.

"Good boy," you coo into his ear as you run your hands up and down his sides. He whines a bit, wishing that your hands were closer to his chest. Your hands finally settle on his hips as you ready to enter him. Diavolo is still unaware of what you were preparing for due focusing on the camera just as you had told him to. Without warning, you thrust your strap into Diavolo's stretched hole, bottoming out completely.

Diavolo's eyes roll back into his skull as he let's out a deafening wail, his walls clamping down hard on your dick. His cum spurts in large amounts all over his chest, covering the previous stains. His vision whites out as his orgasm wracks his body, and his mind becomes fully empty. His mind clears after a bit and he realizes that you're still fucking him even through his orgasm. "Haahhgh! U-unNGHH, M-momm-OH!" Diavolo can't even form a proper sentence as you continue to rail him. You make sure that he can feel every single inch and every single ridge going in and out of his hole as you continue you rough pace.

"I fucking knew it. I can't even fuck you for a single minute without you cumming like a stupid slut," you snarl into his ear. "How many times did I already tell you cum when I give you permission?" You punctuate your anger with a vicious thrust that rams your dick into Diavolo's abused prostate. "OHHH! S-shorry! M' sorry---" You cut him off by smashing your lips into his, shoving your tongue into his mouth. His squeals are now muffled by your mouth but are still loud as ever.

Even though you were angry about Diavolo disobeying you another time that night, but it didn't stop you from being incredibly turned on. One of your favorite things was to reduce Diavolo to a cockdumb slut, to have him moaning without restraint as he cums over and over again from the harsh pounding he's receiving. You keep Diavolo's mouth locked onto yours as you continue to pound him from behind. He whimpers into your mouth as another orgasm rips through his body, just as strong as the last one. "MMHNNGG---" Diavolo tenses up for a second before his body goes completely limp. Even while Diavolo is still reeling from the aftershocks of his orgasm, you continue to fuck into his tight hole, never stopping once.

You finally pull away from the kiss, admiring the way that Diavolo's lips are now plump, glossy, and bruised from your abuse. You finally pause your thrusts and pull Diavolo up by the hair for him to face the camera. "You're nothing but a stupid slut that's desperate to be fucked dumb," you whisper. "Now, you say it."

"...I'm nothing but--*sob* N-nothing but a ss...stupid slut that desperate to be--fucked dumb..." Diavolo can barely get the sentence out, his mind too muddled with all the pleasure and pain going through his body. "Well aren't you a good boy," you grin as you resume your violent thrust, pushing his front down and keeping his ass up in the air. "UuuNGHH! Ahhn, hahh, OHH---MhnnGHH," Diavolo can't even understand what you're saying, too cockdrunk to even process your words. He cums a third time, yet barely anything came out, like you had milked him dry.

After his third orgasm, Diavolo can feel his consciousness begin to fade. "You're passing out already?" you scoffed. "And here I was, thinking that a slut like you could hold out longer, especially to be dicked down."

"Ghkk---nnghh...unghh," Diavolo's moans weaken as he feels his mind slipping away further and further from him, the only thing he could think of was the dick absolutely destroying his insides. Right when he was about to lose consciousness, you bite down on his neck. Hard.

"---!" Diavolo's eyes roll back into his skull completely as he goes through one last mind-numbing orgasm before going limp for the final time. You finally stop thrusting and pull out of him, watching every single inch of the giant dildo leaving his hole. Even when he was unconscious, his hole still clenched down on the dildo like he was still trying to keep it there. You let out a sound of amusement before taking the entire dildo out. Now looking at his sloppy and fucked loose hole, you can't help but want to plant your mouth there and eat him out to your heart's desire...but no, that was for another time. Now, you had to properly care for your lover.

✿✿✿

Levi whines as he cums for a third time, his hand still tugging on his cock. He was so grateful to whoever or whatever caused you guys tape to get released, because it would be a damn shame for no one else to see this. Still, Levi thought. The moment Lucifer found out about you guys...

Levi immediately goes to his phone and opens up the biggest group chat. There are so many messages, most of them from Mammon demanding to know if the video is real. Belphie isn't even bothered while Satan is very bothered and disturbed about the leaked sex tape. Beel only used shocked emojis but lucifer hadn't even replied.

✿✿✿

Lucifer: [Name]. Why is there a supposedly leaked sex tape of you and Lord Diavolo? Is it fake? Or did the two of you actually make a sex tape and let it get leaked.

[Name]: Okay yeah it's real but please don't kill us!

Lucifer: I will be talking to the two of you. Be prepared in 2 hours.

Yeah you and Diavolo were fucked.

[l-in-the-light]

The most embarrassing series of posts about Lawlu you will ever read: edition post-Punk Hazard (part 4)

This one will definitely live up to it's title. The "love is a hurricane" tale continues~

Luffy again showing interest in what Torao is doing. This is already like third time he shows his unusual interest in him (and it will happen a couple more times in this post as well). He really wants to know more about him. Despite the fact he's usually sleeping through backstories of his own crewmates, like Nami. His unusual interest isn't because he doubts Law, we already know he deeply believes him to be a good person. No, this scene exists purely to show us how big and special interest Luffy has for Law. Luffy is also a bit concerned here, we saw the switch happen in Punk Hazard, from now on Luffy will also worry back for Law.

Someone's trolling Luffy here and it's not Usopp, lol. I wonder if this is how Law was as an older brother to Lammy, telling her fake tales just for amusement. He's a teasing older brother type, isn't he? And now all of that is directed towards Luffy. That's so sweet.

Luffy, you were supposed to tell them before, why are you telling them only now?! Take things a bit more seriously!

Law though is so displeased. Not only a hand was slammed into his arm (he secretly liked it despite everything), he was told to get along (he doesn't want to!), and Luffy disappointed him for not sharing about the alliance before.

But let's stop at the "get along" complaint for a bit. Luffy, you goofhead, you didn't introduce Law to your crew?? (and please, don't you know Luffy, ofc Luffy didn't do it "offscreen", this is Luffy we're talking about! He doesn't do introductions! At all!) Poor Law doesn't know their names! How is he supposed to get along with them?? You think Law would ask them about their names? Definitely not! Can you even imagine Law asking about anyone's name?? (yeah, I can't either lol) So to save up his face, he would have to utilize all that info he gathered beforehand (he already knew who they were all the way back at Sabaody after all!).

So he recognized Robin, Nami, Zoro, Sanji, Chopper (and so is able to call them by their names, tho it's worth noting Sanji being a special case and referred to by his title), but he didn't apparently know about Brook, Franky or Usopp (because they got called Bone-ya, Robo-ya and Nose-ya instead of their names+ya). Brook got recruited in Thriller Bark so there wasn't any wanted poster for him back then in Sabaody, so that's understandable. There was one for Franky already, but before timeskip Franky looked completely different so Law didn't recognize him. And...

wait for it...

He didn't recognize Sniperking as Usopp that's why he became "Nose-ya". Yes, the joke lives on! LOL.

Oh Luffy, you really don't make Law's life easier for him, do you? And this way Law got exposed that he did research a bit about the Strawhats before, enough to memorize them. (I mean not like Bartolomeo, but... but! It kinda looks a bit like that here, doesn't it).

Law will get back at Luffy in Zou for that, no worries. Now you will never see the "Law didn't introduce his crew" in any other light from now on, haha. It was a payback. Luffy didn't care tho lol.

You don't have to believe me on that one, but you can't really deny it does sound suspiciously consistent, doesn't it? :3

Law: Why is everyone telling me that?

Also Sanji, we appreciate it, but you're a little bit late with that warning there lol.

To be honest, I think Law is actually perfectly aware of that, but at the same time he wouldn't mind to be called a friend anyway. He only minds it now because he wants to keep his distance and not form any attachments on his way. And doing poor job at it too.

Luffy looks so happy sitting there next to Law, he looks like he's having the best time in his life. He's probably having a lot of ideas of what to do together with Law now that they're friends in alliance. (many of which would not be met with Law's enthusiasm probably lol).

Luffy: Did you just say dinner will happen 5 times a day from now on??

Luffy's level of excitement here is absolutely stunning. And one more thing very important to note: remember how Luffy usually acts when someone yaps a lot? He might for example ask Nami about something difficult, but quickly loses interest with the answer. He often sleeps through explanations. But here? Law's got his full attention! The one who is actually napping through this is Brook, not Luffy. Luffy thinks Torao is cool and he *wants* to listen to him.

Law, where are you looking? Clearly at your favourite Mugiwara-ya grinning over there. His eyes are always tracking Luffy.

A moment later Luffy turns to see Kin and Zoro fight. Do you all think he noticed Law staring at him right there? You two need to stop being so cute. I can't even believe Oda actually drew a scene like that in shonen, even if he didn't make it obvious. I mean, look at it, Luffy's eyes are shining, I bet their eyes met. I told you all that One Piece is a story about love. Omg I'm disgusted with how this scene tugs on my heart right now. To be fair, I'm not even the first person to notice that Law is staring at Luffy there, I saw people pointing it out before.

Luffy: Hey look Law, we're famous!!

Law: But ofc we are, what do you mean?

Luffy is again trying to get any sort of reaction out of Law directed just for him (did he feel encouraged after he noticed Law staring at him the day before?). Luffy, please, stop, this is getting more and more embarrassing to watch you craving for Law's attention like this.

Law though always gives him that attention, curiously enough. There's not even one frame of Luffy calling out to him and Law just ignoring him. Which shouldn't be surprising, Law always seeks out Luffy as well, rarely with words, but at least with his stares.

In this regard, they're a really good match. Luffy wants to be pampered, and Law wants to pamper. I would usually say it's gross, but it's actually really heartwarming. They both get something out of it that they were both craving.

Law: Hey, am I not providing you with enough entertainment? Forget those boring fellas!

Someone's a bit jelly...

And Brook is again watching over them. God, I swear, it feels like he just *knows*.

Again, Luffy listening to Law talking. He would listen to him no matter what Law is saying, wouldn't he? Luffy is known for his terribly short attention span, but for Law he is capable of unusual feats.

(Also notice Law is always grabbing Caesar by his clothes, never in direct contact)

Time for the ransom call. I know that everyone is screaming there, but Law is suspiciously quiet, this is when he should be firm and confident, but instead he's just standing there. I think it means he was actually pretty anxious about this call, kinda taken aback (and it's not because of people screaming around, he had enough time to get used to that with the Strawhats, also usually it doesn't actually faze him). Luffy on the other hand is excited and thinks this is all super fun lol.

And then Luffy goes and takes over the call. Of course we all think he did it just because he's Luffy and that Law is displeased/angry here, but let's do uno reverse. I might turn your worldview upside down from this point on.

What if Luffy actually sensed Law's anxiety and decided he will help him? Luffy is after all really good at reading people's emotions, right? And of course he would want to help his beloved Torao.

Law looks displeased, but that's because of a sudden closeness. Those of you that followed my series on Law's fear of touch and closeness know what I mean. He can stand Luffy when he's close to him, but not out of a blue like that - he needs to brace himself first. That's why his first instinct here is to try to move away. Sure enough, right in the next moment we see Luffy holding the transponder, which means Law lets him do that actually. If he truly was so displeased and angry, he would have reacted faster to take it back or shouted at him.

Luffy's fuming here for no reason whatsover, Doflamingo didn't actually say anything bad to him yet (or at all really). Sure, Luffy got mad over Caesar, but the conversation already changed to something else, and Luffy is still showing an attitude. He's doing it for Law, isn't he.

Law meanwhile is just standing there, still not attempting to take the transponder back. He's not even trying or talking at all. This really doesn't support the idea of "he's so mad at Luffy for doing this", it actually seems to be the exact opposite: he's kinda overwhelmed here and was ever since Doflamingo picked up his call. Ofc he's also more and more distressed now, bracing himself mentally, because he knows he needs to do something and can't leave it all up to Luffy.

Law realized he needs to stop it, because Doflamingo is trying to bait Luffy, and everyone knows Luffy is weak to baits. In a way, stepping up just to prevent Luffy from getting into dangerous scenario, helped him overcome his own helplessness and anxiety. Luffy meanwhile indeed is losing it lol.

Let's look more closely to Law and Doflamingo's conversation here. Law is trying to make the talk very short, down to business and finish it off quickly. Doffy though stays confident and even tries to mock Law a little bit. It's almost like he's saying "Law, kid, you forgot to show me that my subordinate is fine, you need to step up your kidnapping game a little", he's kinda having this patronizing vibe here. "First step of a ransom call, remember? I taught you that myself".

Putting it all together can explain why Law is so anxious, he expected to hear Doflamingo all devastated, angry even after giving up warlord's title, instead Doflamingo is relaxed, mocking and confident, generally acting like he has the upper hand here. Law is worried, did he miss something, because this is not how it should look like, and he is right. Also he can't stand Doflamingo's confident tone, it's most likely making him feel weak, remembering the past. In their fight in Dressrosa Law will try his best to overcome this feeling by mocking Doflamingo back, but right here he was surprised and unprepared. He probably felt again like a kid, still part of Doflamingo's family, and Doffy's mocking tone like a mentor/parental figure scolding his clumsy subordinate truly added salt to the wound.

Law grits his teeth and continues, attempting to finish the call as soon as possible, full of bad feelings. And this is when Luffy snaps back to reality, gasping and reminding himself "I need to help Torao!" and so he does, by doing actually the best thing possible: cutting off the call.

This seems not-canon to you I bet, but I truly think Luffy tried to actually support Law here and it DID work in the end.

Of course Strawhats don't catch up to it and think Luffy just straightup ruined everything, but look at Law's reaction here. He's suddenly calm and does not blame Luffy for anything, in fact, he goes as far as to declare this is all fine. Would he really say something like that if he was truly angry? No, of course not, we have seen him angry everytime he truly believes his plan was just kicked out of the window by a Strawhat Luffy. This is simply not the case here.

Law is still looking pretty anxious there, probably thinking over multiple scenarios in his head. What did he miss? Why is Doflamingo so confident? This is crucial, after all it's not only about his own safety, but safety of Luffy and his crew.

Luffy meanwhile shows his interest in Law again, wanting to know about Law's adventures. He's probably trying to make Law think of something else instead of overworrying, put his mind off of it. Luffy really sticks with his resolve here of taking care of Law as well.

Also it's ultimately cute how Law is mechanically correcting Luffy on the name of the island (helpfully pointing out only the part he got wrong so it's a shorter word to remember for Luffy, awww), but he does it without even an exclamation mark there. He's not angry or irritated about it. In fact, it just shows he understands Luffy has problem with long and complicated words. He probably knows that's the reason he became "Torao" as well. He gets it, he accepts it, in fact he has no problem with it whatsoever.

Even when distressed and lost in his thoughts Law makes sure to still respond to Luffy when he asks something from him, and Luffy this time uses it to bring him out of his thoughts instead of just seeking attention.

Luffy: Yay, so if Torao has never before been to that island, it means we will have an adventure together! And not just one, there's no way I will let you leave me right afterwards. We're so gonna do more adventures! Dressrosa and Wano! Two adventures with Torao!

Law: This isn't an adventure, be serious!! Our lives are on the line!!

Luffy: Breakfast time!

Law: Breakfast time! *gasp* fuck!

Someone got caught up in someone else's pace. 1:0 for Luffy, he did manage to make Trafalgar Law take a break from his worrying.

Now to understand Law's exaggerated reaction here as something more than just a comedy moment we need to first elaborate a bit on the chapter's title that sets the tone between Doflamingo-Luffy-Law interactions and honestly spans through the whole of Dressrosa arc. This is chapter 700 titled "his pace", the next round chapter is 800 which wraps up Dressrosa. Chapters with round numbers tend to have a huge impact on the whole storyline happening (because Oda really loves his number games).

"Pace" from the title means someone dictating how fast the events are going or swaying things to move in their preferred fashion. Doflamingo does it in this snail talk by playing confident and trying to bait Luffy and undermine Law's confidence. Later he also showers his subordinates with compliments so they will do what he asks them to do - that's also setting pace by keeping everyone in line.

Law's pace in this chapter (and in whole of post-punk hazard transition) was him spiraling the things to move where he wants them, his first snail talk with Doffy was just Law having an overwhelming victory over him. Then through the span of one night things move very fast exactly towards the result Law wanted (Doflamingo resigning from warlord's position). Law usually doesn't use his power of controlling pace to make people do what he wants (unlike Doffy), that's not his style, they're just forced to stick for the ride, but he always leaves liberty in their own hands. For example, when he told Luffy to kidnap Caesar or assemble back Kinemon, he didn't tell them exactly step by step how they should do it: instead he left it to their judgement. In other words, he tells them what to do but not *how* to do stuff, he instead trusts in their ability to figure it out on their own.

And then we have Luffy, who selfishly chooses islands they visit and what enemies they're fighting, so he's also "setting the pace" for others. He controls it to a minimum as well like Law, he just makes sure to take care of the biggest danger himself and trusts the others to do whatever they want, he gives them freedom. His crew do their best out of their own free will to deserve Luffy's trust, every chess piece on the board moves according to what they believe is right, so Luffy's board isn't actually a game of one vs one, but instead of one versus many, because every player has as much liberty as Luffy has.

In this chapter Law lost to Doflamingo's pace, but restored himself, and lost to Luffy's pace and this time declared defeat. Doflamingo won against Law, almost won against Luffy, but then Luffy defeated him in one neat swipe. And why? Because Luffy actually wasn't playing alone, Law and Luffy supported each other there. So in the end Doflamingo lost to both of them.

You think Law didn't take a defeat against Luffy here? Then let's rewind back:

Remember this scene? Law was amused that Smoker would even think that Law can overpace Luffy (after all Luffy punched Caesar instead of kidnapping him and did a feast instead of leaving immediately), but he wasn't going to always allow Luffy to do that. Here he declares he's gonna set the pace and make Luffy follow his plan. He does it because it's neccessary or he won't be able to protect him, but also because of his petty pride or "saving up face", if you prefer that term here. He's not gonna just sit there and let Luffy do everything he wants and wait for him to finish off enemies. Law is throwing a challenge, he's gonna compete with Luffy in that regard.

But before they even reach Dressrosa Law already declares his defeat. Let me show you how: remember how he always loses his hat when he's losing?

Like here. Or in Dressrosa, or Winner Island.

Wait, where's his hat here? And this is the next frame after Law's big comical "gasp" moment, when he got dragged into Luffy's pace of "enough worrying, time for breakfast!". Yep, he knew he lost there, allowed himself to loosen up and took off his hat by himself as a sign of his defeat and Luffy's victory. But that's also because he's just a good mannered boy who knows you don't eat with your hat on.

It truly is a 1:0 for Luffy and Law is actually okay with that (losing to Luffy's pace is actually not a negative experience, because Luffy doesn't manipulate people with evil agenda in mind, like Doflamingo. He did it only because he wants Law to relax). And this sets up how the events went on in Dressrosa.

Also can I just point out that all it took for Luffy to sway him was to declare with a smile "Yay adventure with Law! Can't wait! And now breakfast!" and Law was already dragged into his pace? I mean... Law, Luffy didn't even do anything special. He was just basically himself there. Law's so smitten with him that it's all it took, honestly. Of course the support he got on that call from him also counted into that, but Law didn't declare defeat then yet, after all he also supported Luffy back in that call.

In later arcs Law will still attempt to be petty about this ongoing "competition", not wanting to leave it all up to Luffy, lol. He migth have lost once, but the war is ongoing! He's such a petty loser, I adore that flaw in him.

Luffy butting-in, making sure Kinemon doesn't just steal Law away for the Wano adventure. Hey, I'm gonna be part of that adventure as well!

Law's attempt to stop him there is really miserable. He can't bring himself up to deny Luffy when he sounds so happy, huh. My heart can't take it.

Law's already back to worrying again haha. His neverending journey of worrying when together with Luffy continues! Let it never end honestly.

He's also conflicted, because everytime Luffy acts so excited he thinks back to Lammy, as she was the exactly same energetic type of a person as Luffy haha.

i don't think Luffy gets it that this time around he's only making Law worry more and not less, awww.

That's all for now. Dressrosa will come up next (I might take a break from this series to answer some asks first :D). I hope you enjoyed seeing this chapter through different lens, it's fine if you still prefer it as just a comedy moment of Luffy acting like a complete menace and Law regretting his life choices. I think it's neat that the manga supports actually both interpretations, one on more casual level and the other more in-depth.

There is something I want to share about World Seeker Law's dlc, it's not really a spoiler, just one line that Law says that relates to the previous part of this series of posts (if you want to skip it then just don't read from now on! There's nothing more to this post afterwards).

This is what Law says in the game. I know that games are not considered 100% canon, but Oda DID work on both World Seeker and Odyssey, and honestly many lines and overall feeling of the game goes along with the canon. Law's complicated relation to closeness is definitely a part of this DLC, for example.

And here he says he doesn't mind what people actually call him! He never complained about "Torao" when Luffy called him this way, not even once. But he does make this one sour face when Nami does that as well. Makes one really think why is this such a special case for him, doesn't it? :D Again, he wants it to be a special name only from Luffy, doesn't he.

[fountainpenguin]

Scott, Gem, and Martyn Secret Life Ep 1 commentary:

"Geez Scott, why are you so creepy?" / "Everyone needs a hobby <3"

Crying at Scott booking it across the grass to break up Scar and Jimmy as fast as humanly possible and they just start huffing and grumbling.

Scott after running into Pearl, Cleo, Jimmy, and Martyn - "I've bumped into every single one of my exes already..."

slkdjf Skizz apparently cut himself saying "I just wanna cause problems" out of his own POV but Scott got it all on tape

Skizz staying within 10 blocks of Gem is even funnier from Scott's POV because he needs Gem to hold his hand while he follows Scott around a corner... The delicate balancing act of obeying Scott's come hither but also pulling Gem along.

The dead silent push in on Scott's face when he notices Gem inching her base away from his and he's dreading starting his "obnoxiously attach your base to someone else's" task over.

Impulse: "Scott, is my cottagecore-ing okay? :)" / Scott, sweating his pretty little head off as he speed-builds so Gem doesn't catch him in the act, not even turning around: "Yep- looks great!"

Gem, emotionally trudging across the map with Skizz and Scott hanging off her.

I appreciate Gem's commentary of "How much room does this man NEED??"

Gem watching Scott un-merge their bases: "Oh, thank you" / Scott: "What do you mean by that. Why is that a relief to you."

---

Impulse and Gem going over the cliff is funnier with the context that Gem's task was to convince someone to "take a leap of faith while also ensuring they take no damage."

Mental image of Gem begging Impulse to take a flying jump into the water while Impulse is grabbing her by the shoulders and trying to force her into a cherry wood boat because it's cherry wood it's amazing Gem come on slkdjf

Gem: "How much more iron do you need for a chestplate?" / Impulse, taking a moment to pretend to count: "... 8 :)"

Gem, addressing the viewers: "And Skizz follows me around for an uncomfortable period of time."

In Scott's POV, he's just watching unhappily from the distance as Gem starts taking down her wall, but in Gem's POV she actually asked him if she can move her base over and he's just like "Yeah... Yeah, you can if you want to :')" slkdfj

Underappreciated irony in Scott being the one to make a big deal about how clingy Skizz is when he's literally fusing his base's roof with Gem's

It's spawn egg-topia!!

Scott: "I'm making the executive decision to separate our cottages." slkdjf Scott recovers from being possessed by the spirit of clinginess and wakes up like "What HAPPENED last night?? What is this garbage??"

---

Holy cow Martyn dropping from 30 hearts to 12 within like 20 minutes.

lksdjf Martyn: "Let's see if there's any response in the chat to my Cover Me With Diamonds achievement :)" / Gem, Scott, and Impulse immediately triple enchant / Martyn: "Oh :'D"

??? Custom zombie spawner? Neat

He started at 30 and went down to 5.5 hearts?? Geez, dude.

It's funny because in Double Life, I didn't notice Martyn taking that much damage compared to anyone else, but I feel like now I understand why Cleo was so irritated with him lskdjf

Martyn at the start of this episode: "Ew I don't want cherry wood" / Martyn trying to complete his secret task: "Where is all the cherry wood??"

Martyn speedbuilding in panic and quiet, then Joel cracks a joke and Martyn laughs and you hear Bdubs offscreen going "You got Martyn with that one" <3

sdfklsjdf I like how Martyn's idea of copying Lizzie's house involved rushing over to hers and destroying her bed to match the fact that his copied house did not have a bed

Wheezing at Impulse being just 2 steps from pushing the success button but Martyn starts trash-talking cherry wood and Impulse immediately goes "Take that back, take that back right now!" with this guttural snarl and starts stomping towards him because he wasn't cured from his cherry wood obsession yet... Beautiful.

[chaifootsteps]

I think one thing Viv just doesn't get as a writer is that the stuff we see onscreen makes the bigger impression on the audience

we see Stolas repeatedly neglect Via for Blitz and spend most of his screentime after his wife has tried to have him killed obsessing over Blitz? the fans are going to think he's a neglectful dad who cares more about sex/his love life than his own daughter

we see Stolas repeatedly demean Blitz, treat him like a sex object and keep a coercive deal going after he's decided he's in love with him? the fans are going to think he's a hypocrite for claiming otherwise

inserting retcons and exposition text into the dialogue about what a good person Stolas is doesn't fix this. for the retcons it's just whitewashing what already happened instead of addressing it and the offscreen stuff will never make as strong an impression as what we actually see. it's lazy to fix things this way and then blame the fans for not prioritizing

Blitz claiming Stolas was nice to him over the phone on occasion over how he acts every time he's onscreen. Stolas stans love to claim criticals lack comprehension by pointing at what Blitz said in Ozzie's and going 'see? Stolas did treat him nice, Blitz should know better!' and then they ignore that all this happened in the context of a coercive deal we saw Stolas make when Blitz was getting shot at, as if one makes as big an impression or makes up for the other

And for what little we do see the fans who are paying attention tend to notice he's still not as nice as the show claims - just look at the blink and you miss it text exchanges where he offers a total non-apology for Ozzies and still doesn't get what's wrong after being told, then spends the rest of the time being vague and sending mixed signals while Blitz is clear and consistent that he knows the dynamic is: Full Moon is Stolas' night, he pulls the strings, he gets to say what goes and that's still the case in the months Stolas spent dithering around trying to have it both ways.

And when the show is trying to write him as being nice, like in Full Moon, he frequently comes off worse than ever. The way a big part of the fandom is turning on him due to the last two episodes says it all to me - they're starting to remember everything we saw on screen and noticing that the Stolas the show keeps telling us exists and is his true self does not match up with the Stolas we've been shown i.e. the one with all the emotional intelligence of a potted plant

Viv seems to view her shows not so much as stories for the audience, but as glimpses of her very fluctuating headcanons that she's paying someone (albeit not very well) to animate. She doesn't seem to realize that she can't just show her audience one thing and say another on Twitter, and if she decides she doesn't like what she showed everyone, "fix" it with a completely contradicting scene 12 episodes later.

Acceptable things to leave offscreen: the details of frightening scenes so as to make them scarier, the relationships between side-characters, small details like people eating and peeing.

Unacceptable things to leave offscreen: Literally any indication that your main character likes being around his love interest.

[delawaredetroit]

What do you think about the villains' endings?

I'll get into that as I get to the arcs where the League has more focus in my reread...but in general...

Shigaraki: 2/10. I'm less upset about him dying as much as the lack of chemistry between Izuku and Shigaraki in their final fight. Shigaraki doesn't get enough time to get any closure against All for One the way Yoichi does despite being put in similar positions. I also don't like that the most important part of Shigaraki and Shimura Nana's resolution, one of the few highlights of this plotline, happens offscreen.

Magne, Mr Compress: 3/10. I don't think they were well handled, but they don't get enough focus for me to care much either.

Spinner: 4/10. Unfortunately, he spent the arc where he could have been most interesting with his brain completely fried. He brings a lot of interesting ideas to the table, but overall he is mostly missed potential. To some extent, that may be intentional. In the last moments we see him, all he can think of are all of the what ifs.

Touya: 6/10. In the end, Touya gets most of what he wanted. The Hero Endeavor is dead with a reputation destroyed beyond repair. He gets Todoroki Enji's undivided attention for the rest of his days. The points are lowered because too much of that plotline is spent on Endeavor's constant whining and Rei and Shouto didn't get enough focus.

Toga: 8/10. Toga chose her own fate dying for someone she loved using a method she learned from the love she received from the League. Her story leads to the genuine reform she wants - a world where it's easier to live. I don't like that this self-sacrifice was never acknowledged by their society.

All for One: 9/10 for Vestige All for One and 1.5/10 for Original Body All for One. I didn't like All for One just becoming a baby to become unborn without any back up plan, and I didn't like that Bakugou got to be the one to kill him. It gets 1.5 points because it was funny. As for Vestige All for One, his last scenes with Yoichi and the One for All users really hit. I don't think there was enough of a resolution between himself and Shigaraki though. Also, I was a little disappointed in the lack of DFO...

Twice: 10/10. Thematically, it makes sense how and why his death happened. The manga did a good job making readers care about him before sticking the knife in. His death sets up a large part of the manga's conflict in the Third Act.

[thewertsearch]

Karkat's becoming cognizant of all the videogame tropes in his vicinity, and he is pissed. This is what happens when you’re exposed to that damn fourth wall for too long.

Jump cut to Gamzee squatting in a dark corner somewhere, a Google results page for ICP open on his laptop, absolutely seething with anger.

[…] KANAYA: Do You Think Terezi Is Aware Of Your Interactions With Her KARKAT: I DON'T KNOW, PROBABLY? KANAYA: I Dont Want To Sound Too Meddlesome Because I Know People Dont Like That Much But Didnt You And She Used To Have A Thing Like That […] KARKAT: THE THING WHICH MAY OR MAY NOT HAVE EXISTED NOTWITHSTANDING, WHAT RIGHT WOULD SHE HAVE TO BE UPSET ABOUT ME TALKING TO JADE. KANAYA: Maybe She Thinks You Are Trying To Make Her Jealous KARKAT: OH LIKE SHE'S NOT DOING THE SAME THING TO ME BY TALKING TO THAT POMPOUS TOOL WHO'S IDIOTICALLY INSECURE ABOUT THE COLOR OF HIS EYES. […] KANAYA: Do You Actually Believe She Was Pretending KARKAT: YEAH SURE. I DUNNO

As the trolls’ party begins to unravel, so too does their intricate web of relationships. The entire John/Dave/Karkat/Terezi/Vriska situation is already a mess, and if Karkat is developing a legitimate crush on Jade as well, things might be about to go nuclear.

Forget Jade - I think Kanaya’s the one who’s really thriving from this cultural exchange.

Well, that’s certainly more convenient for me. Saves me from having to check everything with everyone, as I was originally planning to do.

Initially, I thought the trolls were just losing cohesion naturally as Project Trolling drew to a close. A lot of them won't give a shit about Project Friendship, so I assumed they'd just left to do their own thing.

This, though, seems like a pretty ominous way to describe the situation. It's like the Veil is a little too quiet, and not just because people have dispersed. Has Vriska been doing a few offscreen murders, or is something completely unrelated going on?

KANAYA: Im Returning To The Core To Deposit The Matriorb […] KARKAT: I MEAN, THAT'S GREAT, IF THAT'S WHAT YOU WANT TO DO WITH IT. BUT YOU CAN'T GO, I NEED YOU HERE. LOOK AROUND, SHIT IS MAYHEM. KANAYA: Ill Only Be Gone For A Few Minutes KANAYA: Anyway Youre Doing A Good Job And I Think You Can Manage To Cope With My Momentary Absense […] KARKAT: IN THAT CASE KARKAT: GOOD LUCK, HOPE IT WORKS.

These two are such good friends. They're probably my favourite platonic friend-ship in the entire comic, just on the strength of how earnest their relationship is.

Damn it, did I seriously just get jumpscared by a ‘Be Eridan’?

[weepylucifer]

Disco Elysium if it was a Hollywood Blockbuster

(inspired by the trailer by @brainrotdotorg)

Harry has to have a glowup arc where he regains his faith in his job and ability to be a good cop. The police isn't criticized here apart from maybe some handwaves at "a few bad apples" rhetoric. In the climactic moment, the phasmid appears and tells him it is his duty and his destiny... to reform the RCM

Because we don't have time for a nuanced take on addiction in this 90-minute movie, the narrative just turns on a dime halfway through to portraying Harry's alcoholism as rugged and badass instead of pathetic, or he suddenly stops drinking when he gets his groove back, with no withdrawal effects shown. The whole thing about speed helping him be better at his job doesn't factor in; Harry drinks and does drugs because he's sad about Dora and there's nothing more to it. All he needed was to buck up and focus on being the best cop in all of Revachol

Klaasje is portrayed as a one-dimensional scheming femme fatale. Her backstory doesn't really come up. She's dumbed down so that Harry can triumph over her, and is also genuinely attracted to him for some reason, "I am Sherlocked" style

Ruby is either cut entirely, or she's genuinely a predatory lesbian and that's it. If the latter, she shoots herself in the head in front of Harry and Kim and they make a MCU-style "Well that happened" quip about it

No political quests! We don't have time for that. Actually, both communism and fascism are only mentioned once in a backstory dump as stuff that happened in a bygone era. If anything, the film ends up really riding for moralism by complete accident

The film makers don't really know what to do with Kim, so he gets reduced to a guy that stands around and delivers snarky one-liners

The Hardie Boys are in one short interrogation scene, not quite enough to make casual moviegoers care when half of them are gunned down

Fan-favorite characters such as Cindy, Cuno or the Speedfreaks can be seen once in the background of a group scene, but have no lines (you KNOW hollywood couldn't handle the Cuno). It's announced on the director's insta as "a little easter egg for eagle-eyed fans"

Joyce has a way more active role, but also her character turns into an utterly flat "milf girlboss" type who gives Harry and Kim direct instructions on what to do, Madame Director style. The movie writers pat themselves on the backs for being more progressive and feminist than the source material. Also she has nothing to do with the mercs, they just sort of... appeared. Don't think about it too hard! It's stressed repeatedly that they're "rogue agents" and it's really nobody's fault that they're there

Evrart is a corrupt mob boss and that's it. He will be played by a skinny actor in a fatsuit. He also doesn't help find Harry's gun, Joyce has someone retrieve it offscreen so she can gravely and meaningfully hand it to him just in time for the mercenary tribunal

The Deserter just kinda being a shitty sad old man would be too anticlimactic for our summer blockbuster, so he is rewritten to be some kind of evil mastermind. Maybe he even directly communicates with Klaasje and tells her what to do, again "I am Sherlocked" style

The tribunal absolutely does end with RCM backup triumphantly arriving to save the day, led by Jean who underwent a mini-arc offscreen about putting his differences with Harry aside because at the end of the day, they're both cops, and goddamn it, cops help each other. He dramatically takes the wig off and chucks it on the ground to signal his character growth, and everything

No homo-sexual underground thought. The Smoker on the Balcony is allowed to show up in one scene, where he flirtily waves at Kim and Harry. Kim nods at him. Disney's first gay character--

There's a moment where Kim talks to Jean, expressing doubt about Harry. Cut to Harry doing something goofy across the room from them. Jean briefly glances at it, shakes his head, turns back to Kim and says gruffly: "He's a loose cannon... but he gets the job done." This is supposed to be a good thing