#And I think she deserves to continue being a total menace into the future

[snekatieii]

Taco is so funny. Girl who is incapable of being normal at all when interacting with people. Girl who spent the first half of her existence acting like something she's not and the second half isolated from basically everybody. She's so mean. Nefarious plans is her default state. She introduced herself to mic by reading her diary pages and insulting her, and she met mepad by kidnapping him. Those are her only two friends. No wonder she doesn't know how to talk to people.

[jteditmanga]

Hi, I am currently rereading One Piece and posting notes about the chapters. Feel free to share your own thoughts.

WARNING: I'm caught up so there will be SPOILERS for future chapters and plot developments.

Volume 6 The Oath Chapter 45 Before the Storm [The Baratie Arc]

The volume cover repeats the chapter cover page.

Sanji says Zeff used to cook for a famous pirate. Who was that exactly? Could that be relevant to the plot?

And the treasure theme continues with Zeff and his beloved restaurant.

Sanji declines Luffy’s first offer like Zoro and Nami. I think Usopp didn't even get a formal invitation until it was time to sail away. I wonder if it also enforces Usopp's insecurity later. I assume everyone just naturally accepted him as part of the crew after the battle, but no one actually told him that right until the moment they had to leave. So from Usopp's perspective it may not be that obvious which could make him doubt his worth as a team member and further feed his insecurity. Poor Usopp, man.

Luffy is a menace in the kitchen, new Odabox for Luffy is also a great touch.

Strawhats' banter.

Sanji attempts to flirt with Nami for the first time and she looks confused, Zoro and Luffy too actually. As long as this behaviour is not rewarded I don't have a problem with 'Sanji is being horny' gag/theme. And as I remember, he does get beaten and frown upon by the crew and others for doing that so, in my opinion, the humor is based on him being pathetic and desperate for attention. Overall I still enjoy his character, but I totally get that other people might find his antics too much, too offensive, disgusting etc. You know, it's up to you to decide how much it bothers you. It's a sensitive topic that deserves attention and I will be coming back to that in future chapters.

[todoscript]

Syndicate —  [ 3 ]

parts: one | two | three

SUMMARY: The four of you arrive at Hatsume’s workshop, hoping to find some leads about the mysterious bullet you discovered in the aftermath of the scuffle against the Shie Hassaikai yakuza group.

genre: mafia au. pairing(s): mafiabosses!todobakudeku x fem!reader word count: 2.1k+ warnings: mature themes. mafia talk. crude language/cursing. future adult and violent scenes. polyamorous relationship. characters are aged-up. taglist: in reblogs. please ask if you would like to be included in the taglist for updates on future parts.

author’s note: oh my god, i am so sorry for the very long wait everyone! trying to crank this part out was a bit of a struggle with everything going on, but i’m glad it’s finally done! i initially planned to make this chapter a bit longer and continue on with some of the next section, but it made more sense to end it off here so the next part could be flushed out more on its own

Nothing but the grating sound of machinery sparking against each other fills the room the moment you walk into Hatsume’s workshop, located in the more uneventful parts of Tokyo, and away from the seeing eyes of the public. Your ears recoil at the noise; however, it is a cacophony of sounds you are used to, considering this is far from your first time here. Thus, it’s not so much a surprise, being greeted this way, though still jarring nonetheless.

Mei Hatsume is a woman who usually busies herself with work. Whenever she wasn’t occupied filling out a client’s order, such as creating the gadgets they requested necessary for certain heists, she was always active in coming up with new inventions—other gizmos to win people over. In turn, she managed to catch the three pairs of eyes that are responsible for overseeing the infamous Yuuei mafia. Before long, the syndicate had become one of her most frequent and loyal clients due to her high-quality skills and work ethic. 

Your three men are in tow behind you when you enter, following in not only your steps but your strained expression over the racket.

“Hatsume!” you shout out to try and capture the girl’s attention, being that her eyes are covered in her dense, protective goggles to even see the four of you coming.

Far too engrossed in her work, her nonchalant hums in between her buzzing equipment indicate that she isn’t going to notice you anytime soon. Knowing this, Bakugou grits his teeth out of annoyance and marches past you.

“Hey Goggle-Head!!”

Unsurprisingly, his yell is garishly loud and is enough to cut through the jarring grinding of the machines and reach Hatsume’s ear. Bakugou does prefer to take a strident approach to things after all. And today especially, he isn’t in the mood to wait around.

“Bakugou. That was unnecessary,” Todoroki says, side-eyeing his partner for his boisterous attitude.

“It was totally necessary, Icy-Hot,” the blonde retorts.

Hatsume soon stops what she’s doing and finally brings the noise to a halt. Lifting her bulky steampunk goggles from her eyes, she properly greets her guests.

“Well, well, if it isn’t my favorite clients!” Her tone is welcoming and chipper, despite the somewhat rude awakening courtesy of the blonde. “What can I help the four of you with today? Perhaps in need of some more firepower for your men? Hmm?” Hatsume wiggles her brows—a crafty gesture she usually gives to entice her customers while flaunting some incredibly elaborate contraption of hers in her arms. Midoriya declines with a shake of his head, waving a hand out.

“No, we’re fine with all the equipment you’ve provided our group with so far, Hatsume. They’ve been working wonders for us,” he says kindly.

“Especially that earring from the other night.” You join in the praises, and Hatsume readily eats them up as her yellow eyes begin to sparkle.

“Ah, the teardrop earring, I presume? As expected, I knew that particular item would perform excellently, what with its compact size and design to elude suspicion, along with its vast set of features—”

“Come on, quit yapping already! We’re here for business, not to give our fucking reviews,” Bakugou dispels the girl’s incessant ramblings with his ill-tempered tone.

Todoroki steps forward, following in the blonde’s approach. “He’s right. Excuse us, Hatsume, but we wanted to ask you about something we encountered last night,” he explains, hand digging into his coat pocket to procure the ziploc bag containing their item of inquiry—the bullet.

Your hands glow magenta; your quirk lifts the bullet from the plastic and into the air to prevent Hatsume from needing to touch it directly for examination. As it hovers in front of her, Hatsume’s eyes start to gleam a brighter amber yellow inactivation of her quirk, allowing her to scrupulously inspect every detail down to even smidgen of a scratch.

A few hums leave her lips the more she tilts her head at the object, index finger steady beneath her chin.

“Well?” you ask, a tad impatient for answers as are the other three. Hatsume gives the bullet one last look before turning to you, a somewhat uncertain look on her face.

“Just who did you retrieve this bullet from?”

“A henchman from the Shie Hassaikai yakuza fired this at us last night while we were in a scuffle with them,” Todoroki answers with Midoriya continuing.

“We managed to avoid getting hit by it thanks to a comrade of ours.”

“Hah, as if those jokers could pose even a threat to us with flimsy weapons like these.” Bakugou punctuates with his arrogant poise, and you playfully roll your eyes at his comment before returning to the situation at hand.

“Still, for us to not recognize something as ordinary as a bullet like this is concerning, adding onto the fact they were willing to use this instead of facing them head-on with their quirks,” you add. There’s a silence lingering in the air at your words, but it eventually isn’t long until Hatsume says her piece. 

“Well, after seeing this, I suppose the talk going around the crime groups is true after all.”

The four of you exchange peculiar looks, inquisitive at the mention of such “talks”.

“What ‘talk’?” Midoriya asks, voice dipping low for his standards.

Taking a seat at her workbench while facing her four guests, Hatsume’s expression grows unusually serious.

“Some of my clients have spoken about some shady business going on in the underground recently.”

“Shady business?” Bakugou repeats vehemently, eyebrow quirked.

“This is the first I’ve heard of this,” Todoroki comments, growing wary at the shift in the situation.

“We practically have total control of the black market on the east side of Japan. What shit could be going on under our fucking radar?” The blonde’s eyes flare a menacing red over the news.

“To begin,” Hatsume continues, “my clients have spoken about a new weapon being spread around amongst many criminal gangs. It’s no surprise you haven’t heard of it actually. The ones producing them have made sure to evade the gaze of your mafia group by offering them to those in the west, and have only recently moved to the east.”

“They didn’t want us to intervene and mess with their steady business on the black market, I’m assuming,” you add, and Hatsume nods at your conjecture.

“Likely. Anyways, this weapon didn’t seem like a big deal at first. Just some talk about a bullet similar to the one here.” Hatsume gestures to the transparent bag. “But a bit of prodding later, I learned that the contents inside the bullet actually contain a drug created by a scientist, which was forcibly taken by the Shie Hassaikai yakuza.”

Midoriya, Bakugou, and Todoroki are immediately attentive at the name, their expressions soon altering into revulsion as if a vile stench had suddenly wafted into the air, turning the atmosphere sour.

“So the yakuza made out with some stolen research and are mass producing these bullets onto the black market behind our backs, correct?” Todoroki relays the info with malice prevalent in his timbre.

“Those fuckers. Thinking they can do whatever the fuck they want, huh?” Bakugou’s teeth grit at every word uttered under his breath, fists clenching together. “They’re asking for it now.”

“Oh, don’t worry, Kacchan. We’ll make sure each and every one of them is delivered the punishment they deserve.” Midoriya joins his fellow mafia bosses in the menacing pressure exuding from them. His smile is far from genuine—two-faced with intense animosity emanating from just a simple glance.

Having been by their side through situations similar to this level of tension, you’re very much used to witnessing these expressions painted on each of their faces—such as a time when their shipment of goods came far delayed due to a few lackeys’ miscalculations. In turn, Yuuei had lost a bit of time in their well thought out schedule, which was something Deku, Ground Zero, and Mercury were not at all happy about as they thrived on pure efficiency. To make the story short, those henchmen had received a rather brutal ending for their errors when the three were done with them.

Since then, the trio have let it become a lesson learned not to rely on a bunch of simpletons to carry out such important tasks. As a result, the mafia group had become more efficient from then on out, now centering around your smaller group of elites in the aftermath of the events.

You have to admit, seeing the three so riled up is quite attractive in your eyes. They were already charismatic on their own—being in their presence gave you a very tasteful glance of their domineering aura. But in action, that charisma somehow manifested many times stronger, and when in pursuit with such determination in hand, it felt like they could do just about anything they set their minds to.

However, there are times when you knew you needed to step forward and become their sense of reasoning, lest they walk through fog with no sense of direction. Now is one of those times.

“Well, to start, we need some leads.” You join in, and the three turn to you, ready for what their right-hand woman has to say. “Hatsume, do you know what the drug does?”

The girl shakes her head, much to your dismay, but offers a hunch. “I can only assume it must disrupt the body in some way on contact.”

“It’s a good thing Kacchan didn’t get hit by it then,” Midoriya comments.

“Shut up, Deku.” Bakugou harshly jabs his elbow into the young man’s sides, annoyed.

“Now’s not the fucking time.”

“Right, right… My apologies…” Midoriya replies, holding no ill will at his partner, despite his rough demeanor. The trivial exchange between the two quickly ceases. You decide to resume your questions directed at the craftswoman.

“Alright then… How about the scientist that created the drug? Do you have any info on them?”

Musing in thought, Hatsume’s eyes draw to the ceiling as she rummages through her head to recollect her memories.

“Hmm… What I have heard is that the yakuza had infiltrated a place located in the corner of Kamino Ward in Yokohama to obtain the drug.”

“So that must be where this scientist’s laboratory or base of operations must be then. Kamino Ward.” Todoroki guesses and the girl gives him a brief nod.

“Then that’s where we’re going next. We’re gonna find this scientist and get the info we need, even if we need to beat it out of them!” Bakugou exclaims, voice thundering throughout the workshop as his palm emits a small, concentrated burst of fire while coming in contact with his fist. “Not a single one of those half-rate yakuza asswipes are getting away, pulling this shit on us.”

“Though I have to warn you,” Hatsume interrupts forebodingly as a shadow casts over her features, “there have been rumors of people disappearing around those parts.”

You lift a brow, suspicious at the meaning behind those claims.

“Disappearing?”

“That’s right. Anyone that so much as approaches that area ends up poofing out of existence.” She emphasizes this notion by springing her arms outward. 

“Oh? Sounds a bit… far-fetched.” you reason, adamant on the idea that no such thing could happen without natural causes. After all, quirks are biological phenomena. Nothing as supernatural as disappearing from existence should be occurring, right?

“No, Angel Face, it sounds more than just far-fetched. It’s more like a load of bullshit to me,” Bakugou chimes in, bolstering your doubt against it.

“Probably something stirred up to keep people off this scientist’s back,” Midoriya speculates. “He’s already had his research stolen from him. I’m sure he wouldn’t want a repeat of that.”

As he appears behind you, Todoroki lays a hand on your shoulder reassuringly. “Even if something like that is true, I doubt it could truly pose a threat against us, considering who we are.” His hand dips down to find yours before lifting it above your shoulder to lay a quick kiss on your fingertips. You smile at both his words and his touching gestures.

Ignoring the affectionate display, the girl only shrugs. “That’s what I’ve been hearing is all, but I suppose you could take it with a grain of salt.”

Despite the ominous admonition, Midoriya gives Hatsume a grin before reaching into the pocket of his coat. “Thank you for the warning, Hatsume,” he sets a wad of cash down on the workbench in front of her, “along with the valuable set of information. We’ll be sure to put everything you told us to good use.”

She returns the smile, fingers curling around the stack furtively. “Well, a pleasure doing business with you, Yuuei. And remember, my services will always be available to you when you need it.”

“Dutifully noted.”

[papabirdurskeks]

I ask this both for Baron Dark, Ariandel and SkekSo !

Give me a character and I will answer: @ben-the-hyena

Oh boy a triple feature! :D Here we go, folks!

Under a read more cause its going to get long but each listed character will be split apart evenly!

First up is Baron Dark!

Why I like them: He is just bombastic in personality! He lives loud in his actions and words, participating in most of the action himself while also showing he is a threat and menacing altogether! I also like that he is one of the few villains that shows he cares for his crew as a “family” (at least for most part of the series before being overtaken with obsession to have power more on his own). Given the dynamic we are given from the show, its obvious he cares and treats them all on a level of respect as well, something so rare to see nowadays! And I also enjoyed that his reasons to take over and do the shit he did in the series, “Because I can!” is just as refreshing and fun to see in a villain too!  And again, his design is a top tier design I love overall! Its menacing, powerful, and outright amazing! Definitely adds to the character and how well he works in effect to keeping my attention! Like just look at that design! And his VA did a wonderful job of adding to that charm that is just delightful to see in his personality! Overall, he is totally a villain I would love to see more of in the future!

Why I don’t: I say my dislikes often fall on the usual tropes of a kid’s show of the 90s. He talks too much when he could be doing things himself and falls victim to the typical “I am too powerful” but doesn’t think of the obvious steps ahead that will be his downfall. But honestly, its so small I don��t find it jarring or that bad to be in the way! It was the 90s and aimed at kids at the time, so we can’t expect TOO much out of that xD

Favorite episode (scene if movie): Oh man, that’s a tough one cause every scene/episode Baron is in he totally slays it! Its either a tie from the first episode to the very last one cause the stakes of start and finish are so well done, I love it all! 

Favorite season/movie: Obviously, the TV series is the best version of him! The comics sucked and turned him too OOC from what was initially given! Like how does one go from point A to be Z so freaking fast? xD

Favorite line: “Because I can.” Yeah, not gonna lie this was indeed my favorite line of his xD

Favorite outfit: Honestly, the outfit he gains near the end of the series is by far my favorite! Its like a mix of the Bejeweled Catacomb Saints and Mictlantechutli put in one and its befitting of the Baron given his gain in power! 

OTP: Baron and Cyborn are my OTP and are married, fight me. 

Brotp: Definitely Brotps with the rest of his henchmen though I see them more being like his adoptive children! 

Head Canon: Baron is of indigenous background! I also like to headcanon that the white tuft/strands in his hair are truly his and have been there since birth!  (I have so many more HCs for him but I will keep it short cause it can go all day x’) )

Unpopular opinion: Don’t think I have one, at the moment at least. 

A wish: To have gotten more information/lore on him and the entire cast, honestly! I would have loved to see more of his character explored and what more he could have had to offer as a series main villain! Hell, the whole damn series had so much to offer! And just the relationships he has with the others and what more he could have done post season and before! So much potential there to be explored! I honestly would not be objecting to a reboot/revival or continuation of the series! 

An oh-god-please-dont-ever-happen: Though with that said, if a reboot does come around, don’t turn it into the mess of current cartoons we have. Not that they are all bad but most of them have been very disappointing in keeping my attention and liking. Keep the same type of messages it had before! It worked beautifully as it did then and still does work now! I’d love to see the same formulas used while also updating it to be more gritty and mature like they did for Castlevania! Just... Don’t turn it into a cringe worthy mess that will ruin Baron and all the characters in the series! Don’t do what the comics did! 

5 words to best describe them: Charmingly evil, badass, fun, conniving bastard, and menacing. 

My nickname for them: Mega dork (affectionately speaking)

Next is Ariandel!

Why I like them: Oh boy, there is a lot to say in terms of why I like him but I will try to keep it short and simple for time purposes!  His design is top tier for me! Like a rotting skull like face? Check! A monstrous body much like a bird’s? Check! And to add he is a giant Corvian, which are one of my favorite enemies in Dark Souls III!  His personality also differs from the usual loud, bombastic, and proud characters I tend to gravitate for. Instead, he’s withdrawn and rather sad to look at and hear. You know he’s going through a lot but don’t know exactly what it is. In game, one can sort of get hints as to what has gone on behind the scenes but at the same time, its still vague and hard to really pinpoint what really did happen. So he has that air of mystery to him that I honestly adore in many characters as it leaves room to explore deeper into their lore! But I also find his personality relatable as well as sympathetic.  But that’s just me, I can gush about him all day but I will cut it short here x’)

Why I don’t: To be honest I don't have any reason not to like Ariandel other then the small fact that he followed Friede and let the Painted World rot in such a terrible state. But that is so minor of an issue to me to really make a difference, lol. I adore this giant bird man!

Favorite episode (scene if movie): I have to say the scene where he ultimately snaps and breaks out of binds after seeing Friede's lifeless body before him is my favorite scene of his. The amount of pain and anguish heard in his scream and the way he moves prior and after; I can very much relate to that feeling. Sometimes, actions truly convey the emotions better in the most powerful means necessary. And this scene alone truly nailed it.

Favorite season/movie: He's only ever seen in the Dark Souls III DLC, so obvious answer points to the DLC!

Favorite line: "When the Ashes are two, a flame alighteth. Thou'rt Ash, and fire befits thee, of course..."

Favorite outfit: Uhh, he doesn't really wear any clothes save for his cape? So I guess the cape does him well as he is, though I always draw him without it xD

OTP: To be honest, I don't ship him with any canon characters within Dark Souls. Friede does not deserve him..

Brotp: Ariandel being best friends with the Ashen One is my ultimate Brotp! Just think of how much of a valuable ally he could have been!

Head Canon: I know his origins are debatable, as either theory I have for him can be plausible but I often lean more towards the idea of him being half Giant and half Corvian! IDK why but I just like it a lot more x’)

Unpopular opinion: While Ariandel is partly responsible for what happened to the Painted World, I still feel he was manipulated overall and probably at one point did have a change of heart before being forced into complete isolation. He plays more the role of the willing/unwilling accomplice then the actual perpetrator of the crime.  

A wish: He could have had a happier ending without having to die for Friede. I know, its Dark Souls. Such a thing is expected to happen in the Soulsborne series but its a wish, right? 

An oh-god-please-dont-ever-happen: That anything beyond the infatuation he had for Friede took place. Just.. No. He loved her but never could ever have her in that sense and never did. Just no, she is horrible to him. 

5 words to best describe them: Sad, lonely, birdman, withdrawn, and tragic

My nickname for them: Papa bird

And lastly for skekSo!

Why I like them: I think its as obvious as the case for Baron Dark. I like evil, smug bastards that shine through their wickedness and don't usually hold back. In the case of skekSo, I actually didn't care for him at first but then after my second viewing of the show, I started to like him more and enjoy his villainy! He's selfish, arrogant, vain, and conniving and I love it! Added that his design is really appealing to the eye and how he carries himself out, I gotta say he's one of the few villain characters from a show that makes the turn around for me to like them instead of hate them more. Also, his voice. Can NOT go wrong with that voice cause DAMN, its good and shows just how powerful a villain can be with a voice like his. And those eyes. Oh man, those eyes!

Why I don’t: Despite his villainy being the main point that caught my attention, its also a part of his downfall too. His constant greed and arrogance pushed him too far into doing what he did and ultimately cost him everything in the end; including loyal allies that end up dying for him in the long run. I hate how easily and quickly he changes his mind when actual logic is put into perspective of his plans and how quick he is to dismiss someone else when they don't please him anymore or things don't go his way for the smallest things. And yes, that is part of his character, I know that. That is what makes him as scummy as he is and why I love how trashy he is. But I also can't ignore just how easily he pushed skekVar away and believed skekSil despite knowing just what a lying bastard he is. IDK, it just feels too obvious but at the same time, it is what it is and I am not upset about it in the least x)

Favorite episode (scene if movie): Honestly, I enjoyed all the scenes with him in the show but mostly in particular with his interactions with skekVar, especially towards the end of the series. It showed a peak part of his vulnerability in his character that honestly I doubt he ever shows to anyone else. He spends most of his time pushing others around and making them fear him but with skekVar there is a sort of mutual respect going that really speaks out in a different way. Maybe I am just reading too much into it, but I always did enjoy how they interacted with one another!

Favorite season/movie: Well, skekSo didn't get much screen time in the movie other then him dying and turning to dust so.... Definitely enjoyed him more in the show then the film xD

Favorite line: "NOOOOO!" (Yes, this scene is still very infamous to me for personal reasons but the way he carried out his "no's" cracked me up each time xD)

Favorite outfit: Honestly, the main outfit he wore throughout the show. It's just so regal and goth, I love it! And as a goth and fashion enthusiast myself, I am all up for the style he has! The battle armor he wore near the end made it a tad more laughable to be honest.

OTP: I started shipping him with skekVar but ended up with an OT3 of skekVar and skekZok. So now all three of them live in a happy relationship with each other in my noodle~

Brotp: I see him being on neutral terms with skekMal! 

Head Canon: I feel that even in the show it wasn’t seen or given, but he did feel a lot of remorse and regret after the loss of skekVar. He seemed very close with him and spoke with skekVar with more trust then he did the others. Perhaps in secret he did mourn the General’s loss. 

Unpopular opinion: Does this count as an unpopular opinion? I know most people see him with just a few strands of hair but I tend to see him with a head full of long flowing white locks he keeps hidden beneath his clothes. It adds to the extra layer of vanity for a proud Emperor such as he! He looses it over time the darkening consumes him and withers down his health. 

A wish: To see what he was like as an urSkek prior to being split up into a Skeksis and urRu. Yeah, I know people don't care or like the urSkeks all that much but honestly, I would LOVE to see more urSkek lore and see what it was that made SoSu so special among his peers. It was said, after all, he had a voice that could move the stars but was conflicted and consumed with darkness. Honestly, I want to know why and who he was prior to all of this mess! SkekSo even says in the show he still has nightmares of the life before so I wonder, what they were and how it was! So much potential here, man!

An oh-god-please-dont-ever-happen: I don’t think I have any of these to be honest? At least with skekSo. Not that I can think of on top of my head now. 

5 words to best describe them: Proud, absolute piece of shit, pretty, conniving, and menacing. 

My nickname for them: Stupid idiot

[grigori77]

2020 in Movies - My Top 30 Fave Movies (Part 3)

10.  WOLFWALKERS – eleven years ago, Irish director Tomm Moore exploded onto the animated cinema scene with The Secret of Kells, a spellbinding feature debut which captivated audiences the world over and even garnered an Oscar nomination.  Admittedly I didn’t actually even know about it until I discovered his work through his astonishing follow-up, Song of the Sea (another Academy Award nominee), in 2015, so when I finally caught it I was already a fan of Moore’s work.  It’s been a similarly long wait for his third feature, but he’s genuinely pulled off a hat-trick, delivering a third flawless film in a row which OF COURSE means that his latest feature is, beyond a shadow of a doubt, my top animated feature of 2020.  I could even be tempted to say it’s his best work to date … this is an ASTONISHING film, a work of such breath-taking, spell-binding beauty that I spent its entire hour and three-quarters glued to the screen, simple mesmerised by the wonder and majesty of this latest iteration of the characteristically stylised “Cartoon Saloon” look.  It’s also liberally steeped in Moore’s trademark Celtic vibe and atmosphere, once again delving deep into his homeland’s rich and evocative cultural history and mythology while also bringing us something far more original and personal – this time the titular supernatural beings are magical near-human beings whose own subconscious can assume the form of very real wolves.  Set in a particularly dark time in Irish history – namely 1650, when Oliver Cromwell was Lord Protector – the story follows Robyn (Honor Kneafsey, probably best known for the Christmas Prince films), the impetuous and spirited young daughter of English hunter Bill Goodfellowe (Sean Bean), brought in by the Protectorate to rid the city of Kilkenny of the wolves plaguing the area.  One day fate intervenes and Robyn meets Mebh Og MacTire (The Girl at the End of the Garden‘s Eve Whittaker), a wild girl living in the woods, whose accidental bite gives her strange dreams in which she becomes a wolf – turns out Mebh is a wolfwalker, and now so is Robyn … every aspect of this film is an utter triumph for Moore and co, who have crafted a work of living, breathing cinematic art that’s easily the equal to (if not even better than) the best that Disney, Dreamworks or any of the other animation studios could create.  Then there’s the excellent voice cast – Bean brings fatherly warmth and compassion to the role that belies his character’s intimidating size, while Kneafsey and Whittaker make for a sweet and sassy pair as they bond in spite of powerful cultural differences, and the masterful Simon McBurney (Harry Potter, Mission: Impossible – Rogue Nation, Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy) brings cool, understated menace to the role of Cromwell himself.  This is a film with plenty of emotional heft to go with its marvels, and once again displays the welcome dark side which added particular spice to Moore’s previous films, but ultimately this is still a gentle and heartfelt work of wonder that makes for equally suitable viewing for children as for those who are still kids at heart – ultimately, then, this is another triumph for one of the most singularly original filmmakers working in animation today, and if Wolfwalkers doesn’t make it third time lucky come Oscars-time then there’s no justice in the world …

9.  WONDER WOMAN 1984 – probably the biggest change for 2020 compared to pretty much all of the past decade is how different the fortunes of superhero cinema turned out to be.  A year earlier the Marvel Cinematic Universe had dominated all, but the DC Extended Universe still got a good hit in with big surprise hit Shazam!  Fast-forward to now and things are VERY different – DC suddenly came out in the lead, but only because Marvel’s intended heavy-hitters (two MCU movies, the first Venom sequel and potential hot-shit new franchise starter Morbius: the Living Vampire) found themselves continuously pushed back thanks to (back then) unforeseen circumstances which continue to shit all over our theatre-going slate for the immediate future.  In the end DC’s only SERIOUS competition turned out to be NETFLIX … never mind, at least we got ONE big established superhero blockbuster into the cinemas before the end of the year that the whole family could enjoy, and who better to headline it than DC’s “newest” big screen megastar, Diana Prince? Back in 2017 Monster’s Ball director Patty Jenkins’ monumental DCEU standalone spectacularly realigned the trajectory of a cinematic franchise that was visibly flagging, redesigning the template for the series’ future which has since led to some (mostly) consistently impressive subsequent offerings.  Needless to say it was a damn tough act to follow, but Jenkins and co-writers Geoff Johns (Arrow and The Flash) and David Callaham (The Expendables, Zombieland: Double Tap, future MCU entry Shang-Chi & the Legend of the Ten Rings) have risen to the challenge in fine style, delivering something which pretty much equals that spectacular franchise debut … as has Gal Gadot, who’s now OFFICIALLY made the role her own thanks to yet another showstopping and definitive performance as the unstoppable Amazonian goddess living amongst us.  She’s older and wiser than in the first film, but still hasn’t lost that forthright honesty and wonderfully pure heart we’ve come to love ever since her introduction in Zack Snyder’s troublesome but ultimately underrated Batman V Superman: Dawn of Justice (yes, that’s right, I said it!), and Gadot’s clear, overwhelming commitment to the role continues to pay off magnificently as she once again proves that Diana is THE VERY BEST superhero in the DCEU cinematic pantheon.  Although it takes place several decades after its predecessor, WW84 is, obviously, still very much a period piece, Jenkins and co this time perfectly capturing the sheer opulent and over-the-top tastelessness of the 1980s in all its big-haired, bad-suited, oversized shoulder-padded glory while telling a story that encapsulates the greedy excessiveness of the Reagan era, perfectly embodied in the film’s nominal villain, Max Lord (The Mandalorian himself, Pedro Pascal), a wishy-washy wannabe oil tycoon conman who chances upon a supercharged wish-rock and unleashes a devastating supernatural “monkey’s paw” upon the world. To say any more would give away a whole raft of spectacular twists and turns that deserve to be enjoyed good and cold, although they did spoil one major surprise in the trailer when they teased the return of Diana’s first love, Steve Trevor (Chris Pine) … needless to say this is another big blockbuster bursting with big characters, big action and BIG IDEAS, just what we’ve come to expect after Wonder Woman’s first triumphant big screen adventure.  Interestingly, the film starts out feeling like it’s going to be a bubbly, light, frothy affair – after a particularly stunning all-action opening flashback to Diana’s childhood on Themyscira, the film proper kicks off with a bright and breezy atmosphere that feels a bit like the kind of Saturday morning cartoon action the consistently impressive set-pieces take such unfettered joy in parodying, but as the stakes are raised the tone grows darker and more emotionally potent, the storm clouds gathering for a spectacularly epic climax that, for once, doesn’t feel too overblown or weighed down by its visual effects, while the intelligent script has unfathomable hidden depths to it, making us think far more than these kinds of blockbusters usually do.  It’s really great to see Chris Pine return since he was one of the best things about the first movie, and his lovably childlike wide-eyed wonder at this brave new world perfectly echoes Diana’s own last time round; Kristen Wiig, meanwhile, is pretty phenomenal throughout as Dr Barbara Minerva, the initially geeky and timid nerd who discovers an impressive inner strength but ultimately turns into a superpowered apex predator as she becomes one of Wonder Woman’s most infamous foes, the Cheetah; Pascal, of course, is clearly having the time of his life hamming it up to the hilt as Lord, playing gloriously against his effortlessly cool, charismatic action hero image to deliver a compellingly troubling examination of the monstrous corrupting influence of absolute power.  Once again, though, the film truly belongs to Gadot – she looks amazing, acts her socks off magnificently, and totally rules the movie.  After this, a second sequel is a no-brainer, because Wonder Woman remains the one DC superhero who’s truly capable of bearing the weight of this particular cinematic franchise on her powerful shoulders – needless to say, it’s already been greenlit, and with both Jenkins and Gadot onboard, I’m happy to sign up for more too …

8.  LOVE & MONSTERS – with the cinemas continuing their frustrating habit of opening for a little while and then closing while the pandemic ebbed and flowed in the months after the summer season, it was starting to look like there might not have been ANY big budget blockbusters to enjoy before year’s end as heavyweights like Black Widow, No Time To Die and Dune pulled back to potentially more certain release slots into 2021 (with only WW84 remaining stubbornly in place for Christmas).  Then Paramount decided to throw us a bone, opting to release this post-apocalyptic horror comedy on-demand in October instead, thus giving me the perfect little present to tie me over during the darkening days of autumn. The end result was a stone-cold gem that came out of nowhere to completely blow critics away, a spectacular sleeper hit that ultimately proved one of the year’s biggest and most brilliant surprises.  Director Michael Matthews may only have had South African indie thriller Five Fingers for Marseilles under his belt prior to this, but he proves he’s definitely a solid talent to watch in the future, crafting a fun and effective thrill-ride that, like all the best horror comedies, is consistently as funny as it is scary, sharing much of the same DNA as this particular mash-up genre’s classics like Tremors and Zombieland and standing up impressively well to such comparisons.  The story, penned by rising star Brian Duffield (who has TWO other entries on this list, Underwater and Spontaneous) and Matthew Robinson (The Invention of Lying, Dora & the Lost City of Gold), is also pretty ingenious and surprisingly original – a meteorite strike has unleashed weird mutagenic pathogens that warp various creepy crawly critters into gigantic monstrosities that have slaughter most of the world’s human population, leaving only a beleaguered, dwindling few to eke out a precarious living in underground colonies. Living in one such makeshift community is Joel Dawson (The Maze Runner’s Dylan O’Brien), a smart and likeable geek who really isn’t very adventurous, is extremely awkward and uncoordinated, and has a problem with freezing if threatened … which makes it all the more inexplicable when he decides, entirely against the advice of everyone he knows, to venture onto the surface so he can make the incredibly dangerous week-long trek to the neighbouring colony where his girlfriend Aimee (Iron Fist’s Jessica Henwick) has ended up.  Joel is, without a doubt, the best role that O’Brien has EVER had, a total dork who’s completely unsuited to this kind of adventure and, in the real world, sure to be eaten alive in the first five minutes, but he’s also such a fantastically believable, fallible everyman that every one of us desperate, pathetic omega-males and females can instantly put ourselves in his place, making it elementarily easy to root for him.  He’s also hilariously funny, his winningly self-deprecating sass and pitch perfect talent for physical comedy making it all the more rewarding watching each gloriously anarchic life-and-death encounter mould him into the year’s most unlikely action hero.  Henwick, meanwhile, once again impresses in a well-written role where she’s able to make a big impression despite her decidedly short screen time, as do the legendary Michael Rooker and brilliant newcomer Ariana Greenblatt as Clyde and Minnow, the adorably jaded, seen-it-all-before pair of “professional survivors” Joel meets en-route, who teach him to survive on the surface.  The action is fast, frenetic and potently visceral, the impressively realistic digital creature effects bringing a motley crew of bloodthirsty beasties to suitably blood-curdling life for the film’s consistently terrifying set-pieces, while the world-building is intricately thought-out and skilfully executed.  Altogether, this was an absolute joy from start to finish, and a film I enthusiastically endorsed to everyone I knew was looking for something fun to enjoy during the frustrating lockdown nights-in.  One of the cinematic year’s best kept secrets then, and a compelling sign of things to come for its up-and-coming director.

7.  PARASITE – I’ve been a fan of master Korean filmmaker Bong Joon-ho ever since I stumbled across his deeply weird but also thoroughly brilliant breakthrough feature The Host, and it’s a love that’s deepened since thanks to truly magnificent sci-fi actioner Snowpiercer, so I was looking forward to his latest feature as much as any movie geek, but even I wasn’t prepared for just what a runaway juggernaut of a hit this one turned out to be, from the insane box office to all that award-season glory (especially that undeniable clean-sweep at the Oscars). I’ll just come out and say it, this film deserves it all.  It’s EASILY Bong’s best film to date (which is really saying something), a masterful social satire and jet black comedy that raises some genuinely intriguing questions before delivering deeply troubling answers.  Straddling the ever-widening gulf between a disaffected idle rich upper class and impoverished, struggling lower class in modern-day Seoul, it tells the story of the Kim family – father Ki-taek (Bong’s good luck charm, Song Kang-ho), mother Chung-sook (Jang Hye-jin), son Ki-woo (Train to Busan’s Choi Woo-shik) and daughter Ki-jung (The Silenced’s Park So-dam) – a poor family living in a run-down basement apartment who live hand-to-mouth in minimum wage jobs and can barely rub two pennies together, until they’re presented with an intriguing opportunity.  Through happy chance, Ki-woon is hired as an English tutor for Park Da-hye (Jung Ji-so), the daughter of a wealthy family, which offers him the chance to recommend Ki-jung as an art tutor to the Parks’ troubled young son, Da-song (Jung Hyeon-jun). Soon the rest of the Kims are getting in on the act, the kids contriving opportunities for their father to replace Mr Park’s chauffeur and their mother to oust the family’s long-serving housekeeper, Gook Moon-gwang (Lee Jung-eun), and before long their situation has improved dramatically.  But as they two families become more deeply entwined, cracks begin to show in their supposed blissful harmony as the natural prejudices of their respective classes start to take hold, and as events spiral out of control a terrible confrontation looms on the horizon.  This is social commentary at its most scathing, Bong drawing on personal experiences from his youth to inform the razor-sharp script (co-written by his production assistant Han Jin-won), while he weaves a palpable atmosphere of knife-edged tension throughout to add spice to the perfectly observed dark humour of the situation, all the while throwing intriguing twists and turns at us before suddenly dropping such a massive jaw-dropper of a gear-change that the film completely turns on its head to stunning effect.  The cast are all thoroughly astounding, Song once again dominating the film with a turn at once sloppy and dishevelled but also poignant and heartfelt, while there are particularly noteworthy turns from Lee Sun-kyun as the Parks’ self-absorbed patriarch Dong-ik and Choi Yeo-jeong (The Concubine) as his flighty, easily-led wife Choi Yeon-gyo, as well as a fantastically weird appearance in the latter half from Park Myung-hoon.  This is heady stuff, dangerously seductive even as it becomes increasingly uncomfortable viewing, so that even as the screws tighten and everything goes to hell it’s simply impossible to look away.  Bong Joon-ho really has surpassed himself this time, delivering an existential mind-scrambler that lingers long after the credits have rolled and might even have you questioning your place in society once you’ve thought about it some. It deserves every single award and every ounce of praise it’s been lavished with, and looks set to go down as one of the true cinematic greats of this new decade.  Trust me, if this was a purely critical best-of list it’d be RIGHT AT THE TOP …

6.  THE OLD GUARD – Netflix’ undisputable TOP OFFERING of the summer came damn close to bagging the whole season, and I can’t help thinking that even if some of the stiffer competition had still been present it may well have still finished this high. Gina Prince-Blythewood (Love & Basketball, the Secret Life of Bees) directs comics legend Greg Rucka’s adaptation of his own popular series with uncanny skill and laser-focused visual flair considering there’s nothing on her previous CV to suggest she’d be THIS good at mounting a stomping great ultraviolent action thriller, ushering in a thoroughly engrossing tale of four ancient, invulnerable immortal warriors – Andy AKA Andromache of Scythia (Charlize Theron), Booker AKA Sebastian de Livre (Matthias Schoenaerts), Joe AKA Yusuf Al-Kaysani (Wolf’s Marwan Kenzari) and Nicky AKA Niccolo di Ginova (Trust’s Luca Marinelli) – who’ve been around forever, hiring out their services as mercenaries for righteous causes while jealously guarding their identities for fear of horrific experimentation and exploitation should their true natures ever be discovered.  Their anonymity is threatened, however, when they’re uncovered by former CIA operative James Copley (Chiwetel Ejiofor), who’s working for the decidedly dodgy pharmaceutical conglomerate run by sociopathic billionaire Steven Merrick (Harry Melling, formerly Dudley in the Harry Potter movies), who want to capture these immortals so they can patent whatever it is that makes them keep on ticking … just as a fifth immortal, US Marine Nile Freeman (If Beale Street Could Talk’s KiKi Layne), awakens after being “killed” on deployment in Afghanistan.  The supporting players are excellent, particularly Ejiofor, smart and driven but ultimately principled and deeply conflicted about what he’s doing, even if he does have the best of intentions, and Melling, the kind of loathsome, reptilian scumbag you just love to hate, but the film REALLY DOES belong to the Old Guard themselves – Schoenaerts is a master brooder, spot-on casting as the group’s relative newcomer, only immortal since the Napoleonic Wars but clearly one seriously old soul who’s already VERY tired of the lifestyle, while Joe and Nicky (who met on opposing sides of the Crusades) are simply ADORABLE, an unapologetically matter-of-fact gay couple who are sweet, sassy and incredibly kind, the absolute emotional heart of the film; it’s the ladies, however, that are most memorable here.  Layne is exceptional, investing Nile with a steely intensity that puts her in good stead as her new existence threatens to overwhelm her and MORE THAN qualified to bust heads alongside her elders … but it’s ancient Greek warrior Andy who steals the film, Theron building on the astounding work she did in Atomic Blonde to prove, once and for all, that there’s no woman on Earth who looks better kicking arse than her (as Booker puts it, “that woman has forgotten more ways to kill than entire armies will ever learn”); in her hands, Andy truly is a goddess of death, tough as tungsten alloy and unflappable even in the face of hell itself, but underneath it all she hides a heart as big as any of her friends’.  They’re an impossibly lovable bunch and you feel you could follow them on another TEN adventures like this one, which is just as well, because Prince-Blythewood and Rucka certainly put them through their paces here – the drama is high (but frequently laced with a gentle, knowing sense of humour, particularly whenever Joe and Nicky are onscreen), as are the stakes, and the frequent action sequences are top-notch, executed with rare skill and bone-crunching zest, but also ALWAYS in service to the story.  Altogether this is an astounding film, a genuine victory for its makers and, it seems, for Netflix themselves ��� it’s become one of the platform’s biggest hits to date, earning well-deserved critical acclaim and great respect and genuine geek love from the fanbase at large.  After this, a sequel is not only inevitable, it’s ESSENTIAL …

5.  MANK – it’s always nice when David Fincher, one of my TOP FIVE ALL TIME FAVOURITE DIRECTORS, drops a new movie, because it can be GUARANTEED to place good and high in my rundown for that year.  The man is a frickin’ GENIUS, a true master of the craft, genuinely one of the auteur’s auteurs.  I’ve NEVER seen him deliver a bad film – even a misfiring Fincher (see The Curious Case of Benjamin Button or Alien 3) is still capable of creating GREAT CINEMA.  How? Why?  It’s because he genuinely LOVES the art form, it’s been his obsession all his life, and he’s spent every day of it becoming the best possible filmmaker he can be.  Who better to tell the story of the creation of one of the ULTIMATE cinematic masterpieces, then? ��Benjamin Ross’ acclaimed biopic RKO 281 covered similar ground, presenting a compelling look into the making Citizen Kane, the timeless masterpiece of Hollywood’s ULTIMATE auteur, Orson Welles, but Fincher’s film is more interested in the original inspiration for the story, how it was written and, most importantly, the man who wrote it – Herman J. Mankiewicz, known to his friends as Mank. One of my favourite actors of all time, Gary Oldman, delivers yet another of his career best performances in the lead role, once a man of vision and incredible storytelling skill whose talents have largely been squandered through professional difficulties and personal vices, a burned out one-time great fallen on hard times whom Welles picks up out of the trash, dusts off and offers a chance to create something truly great again.  The only catch?  The subject of their film (albeit dressed up in the guise of fictional newspaper magnate Charles Foster Kane) is to be real-life publisher, politico and tycoon William Randolph Hurst (Charles Dance), once Mank’s friend and patron before they had a very public and messy falling out which partly led to his current circumstances.  As he toils away in seclusion on what is destined to become his true masterwork, flashbacks reveal to us the fascinating, moving and ultimately tragic tale of his rise and fall from grace in the movie business, set against the backdrop of one of the most tumultuous periods in American history.  Shooting a script that his own journalist and screenwriter father, Jack, crafted and then failed to bring to the screen himself before his death in 2003, Fincher has been working for almost a quarter century to make this film, and all that passion and drive is writ large on the screen – this is a glorious film ABOUT film, the art of it, the creation of it, and all the dirty little secrets of what the industry itself has always really been like, especially in that most glamorous and illusory of times.  The fact that Fincher shot in black and white and intentionally made it look like it was made in the early 1940s (the “golden age of the Silver Screen”, if you will) may seem like a gimmick, but instead it’s a very shrewd choice that expertly captures the gloss and moodiness of the age, almost looking like a contemporary companion piece to Kane itself, and it’s the perfect way to frame all the sharp-witted observation, subtly subversive character development and murky behind-the-scenes machinations that tell the story.  Oldman is in every way the star here, holding the screen with all the consummate skill and flair we’ve come to expect from him, but there’s no denying the uniformly excellent supporting cast are equal to the task here – Dance is at his regal, charismatic best as Hearst, while Amanda Seyfried is icily classy on the surface but mischievous and lovably grounded underneath as Hearst’s mistress, Marion Davies, who formed the basis for Kane’s most controversial character, Arliss Howard (Full Metal Jacket, The Lost World: Jurassic Park, Moneyball) brings nuance and complexity to the role of MGM founder Louis B. Mayer, Tom Pelphrey (Banshee, Ozark) is understated but compelling as Mank’s younger screenwriter brother Joseph, and Lily Collins and Tuppence Middleton exude class and long-suffering stubbornness as the two main women in Mank’s life (his secretary and platonic muse, Rita Alexander, and his wife, Sara), while The Musketeers’ Tom Burke’s periodic but potent appearances as Orson Welles help to drive the story in the “present”.  Another Netflix release which I was (thankfully) able to catch on the big screen during one of the brief lulls between British lockdowns, this was a decidedly meta cinematic experience that perfectly encapsulated not only what is truly required for the creation of a screen epic, but also the latest pinnacle in the career of one of the greatest filmmakers working in the business today, powerful, stirring, intriguing and surprising in equal measure. Certainly it’s one of the most important films ABOUT so far film this century, but is it as good as Citizen Kane?  Boy, that’s a tough one …

4.  ENOLA HOLMES – ultimately, my top film for the autumn/winter movie season was also the film which finally topped my Netflix Original features list, as well as beating all other streaming offerings for the entire year (which is saying something, as you should know by now).  Had things been different, this would have been one of Warner Bros’ BIGGEST releases for the year in the cinema, of that I have no doubt, a surprise sleeper hit which would have taken the world by storm – as it is it’s STILL become a sensation, albeit in a much more mid-pandemic, lockdown home-viewing kind of way.  Before you start crying oh God no, not another Sherlock Holmes adaptation, this is a very different beast from either the Guy Ritchie take or the modernized BBC show, instead side-lining the great literary sleuth in favour of a delicious new AU version, based on The Case of the Missing Marquess, the first novel in the Enola Holmes Mysteries literary series from American YA author Nancy Springer.  Positing that Sherlock Holmes (Henry Cavill) and his elder brother Mycroft (Sam Claflin) had an equally ingenious and precocious baby sister, the film introduces us to Enola (Stranger Things’ Millie Bobby Brown), who’s been raised at home by their strong-willed mother Eudoria (Helena Bonham Carter) to be just as intelligent, well-read and intellectually skilled as her far more advantageously masculine elder siblings.  Then, on the morning of her sixteenth birthday, Enola awakens to find her mother has vanished, putting her in a pretty pickle since this leaves her a ward of Mycroft, a self-absorbed social peacock who finds her to be wilfully free-spirited and completely ill equipped to face the world, concluding that the only solution is sending her to boarding school where she’ll learn to become a proper lady.  Needless to say she’s horrified by the prospect, deciding to run away and search for her mother instead … this is about as perfect a family adventure film as you could wish for, following a vital, capable and compelling teen detective-in-the-making as she embarks on her very first investigation, as well as winding up tangled in a second to boot involving a young runaway noble, Viscount Tewkesbury, the Marquess of Basilwether (Medici’s Louis Partridge), and the film is a breezy, swift-paced and rewardingly entertaining romp that feels like a welcome breath of fresh air for a literary property which, beloved as it may be, has been adapted to death over the years.  Enola Holmes a brilliant young hero who’s perfectly crafted to carry the franchise forward in fresh new directions, and Brown brings her to life with effervescent charm, boisterous energy and mischievous irreverence that are entirely irresistible; Cavill and Claflin, meanwhile, are perfectly cast as the two very different brothers – this Sherlock is much less louche and world-weary than most previous versions, still razor sharp and intellectually restless but with a comfortable ease and a youthful spring in his step that perfectly suits the actor, while Mycroft is as superior and arrogant as ever, a preening arse we derive huge enjoyment watching Enola consistently get the best of; Bonham Carter doesn’t get a lot of screen-time but as we’d expect she does a lot with what she has to make the practical, eccentric and unapologetically modern Eudoria thoroughly memorable, while Partridge is carefree and likeable as the naïve but irresistible Tewkesbury, and there are strong supporting turns from Frances de la Tour as his stately grandmother, the Dowager, Susie Wokoma (Crazyhead, Truth Seekers) as Emily, a feisty suffragette who runs a jujitsu studio, Burn Gorman as dastardly thug-for-hire Linthorn, and Four Lions’ Adeel Akhtar as a particularly scuzzy Inspector Lestrade.  Seasoned TV director Harry Bradbeer (Fleabag, Killing Eve) makes his feature debut with an impressive splash, unfolding the action at a brisk pace while keeping the narrative firmly focused on an intricate mystery plot that throws in plenty of ingenious twists and turns before a suitably atmospheric climax and pleasing denouement which nonetheless artfully sets up more to come in the future, while screenwriter Jack Thorne (His Dark Materials, The Scouting Book for Boys, Wonder) delivers strong character work and liberally peppers the dialogue with a veritable cavalcade of witty zingers.  Boisterous, compelling, amusing, affecting and exciting in equal measure, this is a spirited and appealing slice of cinematic escapism that flatters its viewers and never talks down to them, a perfect little period adventure for a cosy Sunday afternoon.  Obviously there’s plenty of potential for more, and with further books to adapt there’s more than enough material for a pile of sequels – Neflix would be barmy indeed to turn their nose up at this opportunity …

3.  1917 – it’s a rare thing for a film to leave me truly shell-shocked by its sheer awesomeness, for me to walk out of a cinema in a genuine daze, unable to talk or even really think about much of anything for a few hours because I’m simply marvelling at what I’ve just witnessed.  Needless to say, when I do find a film like that (Fight Club, Inception, Mad Max: Fury Road) it usually earns a place very close to my heart indeed.  The latest tour-de-force from Sam Mendes is one of those films – an epic World War I thriller that plays out ENTIRELY in one shot, which doesn’t simply feel like a glorified gimmick or stunt but instead is a genuine MASTERPIECE of film, a mesmerising journey of emotion and imagination in a shockingly real environment that’s impossible to tear your eyes away from.  Sure, Mendes has impressed us before – his first film, American Beauty, is a GREAT movie, one of the most impressive feature debuts of the 2000s, while Skyfall is, in my opinion, quite simply THE BEST BOND FILM EVER MADE – but this is in a whole other league.  It’s an astounding achievement, made all the more impressive when you realise that there’s very little trickery at play here, no clever digital magic (just some augmentation here and there), it’s all real locations and sets, filmed in long, elaborately choreographed takes blended together with clever edits to make it as seamless as possible – it’s not the first film to try to do this (remember Birdman? Bushwick?), but I’ve never seen it done better, or with greater skill. But it’s not just a clever cinematic exercise, there’s a genuine story here, told with guts and urgency, and populated by real flesh and blood characters – the heart of the film is True History of the Kelly Gang’s George MacKay and Dean Chapman (probably best known as Tommen Baratheon in Game of Thrones) as Lance Corporals Will Schofield and Tom Blake, the two young tommies sent out across enemy territory on a desperate mission to stop a British regiment from rushing headlong into a German trap (Tom himself has a personal stake in this because his brother is an officer in the attack).  They’re a likeable pair, very human and relatable throughout, brave and true but never so overtly heroic that they stretch credibility, so when tragedy strikes along the way it’s particularly devastating; both deliver exceptional performances that effortlessly carry us through the film, and they’re given sterling support from a selection of top-drawer British talent, from Sherlock stars Andrew Scott and Benedict Cumberbatch to Mark Strong and Colin Firth, each delivering magnificently in small but potent cameos.  That said, the cinematography and art department are the BIGGEST stars here, masterful veteran DOP Roger Deakins (The Shawshank Redemption, Blade Runner 2049 and pretty much the Coen Brothers’ entire back catalogue among MANY others) making every frame sing with beauty, horror, tension or tragedy as the need arises, and the environments are SO REAL it feels less like production design than that someone simply sent the cast and crew back in time to film in the real Northern France circa 1917 – from a nightmarish trek across No Man’s Land to a desperate chase through a ruined French village lit only by dancing flare-light in the darkness before dawn, every scene is utterly immersive and simply STUNNING.  I don’t think it’s possible for Mendes to make a film better than this, but I sure hope he gives it a go all the same.  Either way, this was the most incredible, exhausting, truly AWESOME experience I had at the cinema all year – it’s a film that DESERVES to be seen on the big screen, and I feel truly sorry for those who missed the chance …

2.  BIRDS OF PREY & THE FANTABULOUS EMANCIPATION OF ONE HARLEY QUINN – the only reason 1917 isn’t at number two is because Warner Bros.’ cinematic DC Extended Universe project FINALLY got round to bringing my favourite DC Comics title to the big screen.  It was been the biggest pleasure of my cinematic year getting to see my top DC superheroines brought to life on the big screen, and it was done in high style, in my opinion THE BEST of the DCEU films to date (yup, I loved it EVEN MORE than the Wonder Woman movies).  It was also great seeing Harley Quinn return after her show-stealing turn in David Ayer’s clunky but ultimately still hugely enjoyable Suicide Squad, better still that they got her SPOT ON this time – this is the Harley I’ve always loved in the comics, unpredictable, irreverent and entirely without regard for what anyone else thinks of her, as well as one talented psychiatrist.  Margot Robbie once more excels in the role she was basically BORN to play, clearly relishing the chance to finally do Harley TRUE justice, and she’s a total riot from start to finish, infectiously lovable no matter what crazy, sometimes downright REPRIHENSIBLE antics she gets up to.  Needless to say she’s the nominal star here, her latest ill-advised adventure driving the story – finally done with the Joker and itching to make her emancipation official, Harley publicly announces their breakup by blowing up Ace Chemicals (their love spot, basically), inadvertently painting a target on her back in the process since she’s no longer under the assumed protection of Gotham’s feared Clown Prince of Crime – but that doesn’t mean she eclipses the other main players the movie’s REALLY supposed to be about.  Each member of the Birds of Prey is beautifully written and brought to vivid, arse-kicking life by what had to be 2020’s most exciting cast – Helena Bertinelli, the Huntress, is the perfect character for Mary Elizabeth Winstead to finally pay off on that action hero potential she showed in Scott Pilgrim Vs. the World, but this is a MUCH more enjoyable role outside of the fight choreography because while Helena may be a world-class dark avenger, socially she’s a total dork, which just makes her thoroughly adorable; Rosie Perez is similarly perfect casting as Renee Montoya, the uncompromising pint-sized Gotham PD detective who kicks against the corrupt system no matter what kind of trouble it gets her into, and just gets angrier all the time, paradoxically making us like her even more; and then there’s the film’s major controversy, at least as far as the fans are concerned, namely one Cassandra Cain.  Sure, this take is VERY different from the comics’ version (a nearly mute master assassin who went on to become the second woman to wear the mask of Batgirl before assuming her own crime-fighting mantle as Black Bat and now Orphan), but personally I like to think this is simply Cass at THE VERY START of her origin story, leaving plenty of time for her to discover her warrior origins when the DCEU finally gets around to introducing her mum, Lady Shiva (personally I want Michelle Yeoh to play her, but that’s just me) – anyways, here she’s a skilled child pickpocket whose latest theft inadvertently sets off the larger central plot, and newcomer Ella Jay Basco brings a fantastic pre-teen irreverence and spiky charm to the role, beautifully playing against Robbie’s mercurial energy.  My favourite here BY FAR, however, is Dinah Lance, aka the Black Canary (not only my favourite Bird of Prey but my very favourite DC superheroine PERIOD), the choice of up-and-comer Jurnee Smollet-Bell (Friday Night Lights, Underground) proving to be the film’s most inspired casting – a club singer with the metahuman ability to emit piercing supersonic screams, she’s also a ferocious martial artist (in the comics she’s one of the very best fighters IN THE WORLD), as well as a wonderfully pure soul you just can’t help loving, and it made me SO UNBELIEVABLY HAPPY that they got my Canary EXACTLY RIGHT.  Altogether they’re a fantastic bunch of badass ladies, basically my perfect superhero team, and the way they’re all brought together (along with Harley, of course) is beautifully thought out and perfectly executed … they’ve also got one hell of a threat to overcome, namely Gotham crime boss Roman Sionis, the Black Mask, one of the Joker’s chief rivals – Ewan McGregor brings his A-game in a frustratingly rare villainous turn (my number one bad guy for the movie year), a monstrously narcissistic, woman-hating control freak with a penchant for peeling off the faces of those who displease him, sharing some exquisitely creepy chemistry with Chris Messina (The Mindy Project) as Sionis’ nihilistic lieutenant Victor Zsasz.  This is about as good as superhero cinema gets, a perfect example of the sheer brilliance you get when you switch up the formula to create something new, an ultra-violent, unapologetically R-rated middle finger to the classic tropes, a fantastic black comedy thrill ride that’s got to be the most full-on feminist blockbuster ever made – it’s helmed by a woman (Dead Pigs director Cathy Yan), written by a woman (Bumblebee’s Christina Hodson), produced by more women and ABOUT a bunch of badass women magnificently triumphing over toxic masculinity in all its forms.  It’s also simply BRILLIANT – the cast are all clearly having a blast, the action sequences are first rate (the spectacular GCPD evidence room fight in which Harley gets to REALLY cut loose is the undisputable highlight), it has a gleefully anarchic sense of humour and is simply BURSTING with phenomenal homages, references and in-jokes for the fans (Bruce the hyena! Stuffed beaver! Roller derby!).  It’s also got a killer soundtrack, populated almost exclusively by numbers from female artists.  Altogether, then, this is the VERY BEST the DCEU has to offer to date, and VERY NEARLY my absolute FAVOURITE film of 2020.  Give it all the love you can, it sure as hell deserves it.

1.  TENET – granted, the streaming platforms (particularly Netflix and Amazon) certainly saved our cinematic summer, but I’m still IMMEASURABLY glad that my ultimate top-spot winner FOR THE WHOLE YEAR was one I got to experience on THE BIG SCREEN. You gotta hand it to Christopher Nolan, he sure hung in there, stubbornly determined that his latest cinematic masterpiece WOULD be released in cinemas in the summer (albeit ultimately landing JUST inside the line in the final week of August and ultimately taking the bite at the box office because of the still shaky atmosphere), and it was worth all the fuss because, for me, this was THE PERFECT MOVIE for me to get return to cinemas with.  I mean, okay, in the end it WASN’T the FIRST new movie I saw after the first reopening, that honour went to Unhinged, but THIS was my first real Saturday night-out big screen EXPERIENCE since March.  Needless to say, Nolan didn’t disappoint this time any more than he has on any of his consistently spectacular previous releases, delivering another twisted, mind-boggling headfuck of a full-blooded experiential sensory overload that comes perilously close to toppling his long-standing auteur-peak, Inception (itself second only by fractions to The Dark Knight as far as I’m concerned). To say much at all about the plot would give away major spoilers – personally I’d recommend just going in as cold as possible, indeed you really should just stop reading this right now and just GO SEE IT.  Still with us?  Okay … the VERY abridged version is that it’s about a secret war being waged between the present and the future by people capable of “inverting” time in substances, objects, people, whatever, into which the Protagonist (BlacKkKlansman’s John David Washington), an unnamed CIA agent, has been dispatched in order to prevent a potential coming apocalypse. Washington is once again on top form, crafting a robust and compelling morally complex heroic lead who’s just as comfortable negotiating the minefields of black market intrigue as he is breaking into places or dispatching heavies, Kenneth Branagh delivers one of his most interesting and memorable performances in years as brutal Russian oligarch Andrei Sator, a genuinely nasty piece of work who was ALMOST the year’s very best screen villain, Elizabeth Debicki (The Night Manager, Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2, Widows) brings strength, poise and wounded integrity to the role of Sator’s estranged wife, Kat, and Aaron Taylor-Johnson gets to use his own accent for once as tough-as-nails British Intelligence officer Ives, while there are brief but consistently notable supporting turns and cameos from Martin Donovan, Yesterday’s Himesh Patel, Dirk Gently’s Fiona Dourif and, of course, Nolan’s good luck charm, Michael Caine.  The cast’s biggest surprise, however, is Robert Pattinson, truly a revelation in what has to be, HANDS DOWN, his best role to date, Neil, the Protagonist’s mysterious handler – he’s by turns cheeky, slick, duplicitous and thoroughly badass, delivering an enjoyably multi-layered, chameleonic performance which proves what I’ve long maintained, that the former Twilight star is actually a fucking amazing actor, and on the basis of this, even if that amazing new teaser trailer wasn’t making the rounds, I think the debate about whether or not he’s the right choice for the new Batman is now academic.  As we’ve come to expect from Nolan, this is a TRUE tour-de-force experience, a visual triumph and an endlessly engrossing head-scratcher, Nolan’s screenplay bringing in seriously big ideas and throwing us some major narrative knots and loopholes, constantly wrong-footing the viewer while also setting up truly revelatory payoffs from seemingly low-key, unimportant beginnings – this is a film you need to be awake and attentive for or you could miss something pretty vital. The action sequences are, as ever, second to none, some of the year’s very best set-pieces coming thick and fast and executed with some of the most accomplished skill in the business, while Nolan-regular cinematographer Hoyte van Hoytema (Interstellar and Dunkirk, as well as the heady likes of Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy, SPECTRE and Ad Astra) once again shows he’s one of the best camera-wizards in the business today by delivering some absolutely mesmerising visuals.  Notably, Nolan’s other regular collaborator, composer Hans Zimmer, is absent here (although he had good reason, since he was working on his dream project at the time, the fast-approaching screen adaptation of Dune), but Ludwig Göransson (best known for his collaborations with Ryan Coogler Fruitvale Station, Creed and Black Panther, as well as career-best work on The Mandalorian) is a fine replacement, crafting an intriguingly internalised, post-modern musical landscape that thrums and pulses in time with the story and emotions of the characters rather than the action itself. Interestingly it’s on the subject of sound that some of the film’s rare detractions have been levelled, and I can see some of the points – the soundtrack mix is an all-encompassing thing, and there are times when the dialogue can be overwhelmed, but in Nolan’s defence this film is a heady, immersive experience, something you really need to concentrate on, so these potential flaws are easily forgiven.  As a work of filmmaking art, this is another flawless wonder from one of the true masters of the craft working in cinema today, but it’s art with palpable substance, a rewarding whole that proved truly unbeatable in 2020 …

[namjoonchronicles]

protocol • nj

↳ genre fluff, domestic, parenthood

↳ words 2.7k

↳ summary Not everyone has a clue on how to raise a genius child, especially you.

↳ warning none

This is third time in a row that you find yourself waiting in this office. The hideous view of the mahogany desk, the slanted photo frame by the door sill. When the secretary leaves her desk and gives you an annoyed look, you felt the need to rise from your chair and tell her exactly how you feel before she even gets near.

“Listen, with all due respect,” you began with a sigh, “This is a horrendous waiting spell, my husband and I—“

Namjoon just went out to get coffee for both of you and he came forward to a scene he wasn’t prepared for.

“How many more procedures do we need to go through, just!” your voice raises, “to get an elementary school scholarship? Other people have their jobs to get to, and honestly fuck you and your stupid protocols. Why do you even have an office when you’re out 24/7.”

Heels spun to see your husband’s caught in the headlights eye, holding up two coffee takeaways, probably stopped breathing 2 minutes ago. You grabbed your hand bag and the documents in the secretary’s hand, and told her with a menacing tone,

“If my baby boy doesn’t get the scholarship he very much deserved, that’s on you.”

You snatched the coffee from Namjoon’s hand and grumbled, “We’re leaving.”

Namjoon followed immediately after, too stunned to even say a word. The secretary, in her expensive Alexander McQueen, and Pandora bracelets stood there with her arms down. Namjoon bows numerous times, even as he exits the revolving door. His wife is fuming, he hasn’t had breakfast, or lunch, can this day get any worse?

Fuck that because his wife is marching towards the car and finds the parking ticket on the windshield. You crumple that up and throw it on the ground, fuming.

Namjoon zooms on in the balled-up parking ticket and picks it up from the tar road as you angrily climb into the car and shut the car door as hard as you can. Namjoon climbs in on the passenger seat, holding his breath.

By now, you’re leaning your forehead on the steering wheel, sniffling.

“Babe,” barely audible but full of soothing weight, his large hand covered your back, up and down, side to side. Then it crept up your shoulders,as he pinches them with just the right amount of pressure and presses his lips on them, whispering, “It’s going to be okay.”

You leaned back to your car seat, finally having calmed a little. Tears streaming down your cheek still. They just continuously roll. They just won’t stop.

“For all we care, Koya doesn’t even need the scholarship. We could totally afford the school,” he said with a little shrug and the clarity of a billionaire.

“Yeah but he deserves it, he worked hard for it...”

“But he doesn’t need it.”

Namjoon switches in his seat, “We’ve been battling this out for two weeks now, I think it’s time that we move on and pay him ourselves... it’s not like it was too much, you know damn well I could afford his fees without having to go through this trouble of asking signatures from people who are clearly shirking from their much needed duty.”

There’s truth in his words. But Hyun isn’t just enrolling into an elementary school. He was enrolling in an exclusive curriculum that was arranged for above average IQ. That, he got from his dad, you’re sure.

“The parking ticket,” you squeaked.

“I got it,” he shot.

After what seemed forever, the car finally moves. Koya is sent to an art class on weekends so when you fetch him, his clothes were stained with all kinds of color. Namjoon and you looked from the car window, with a fond smile plastered on both your faces.

“He couldn’t be more obvious ha,” you commented. And Namjoon just smiled wider.

“Go get your son,” you said through a big grin.

“I’mma go get my son,” Namjoon said, the seatbelt whirled, and the car door clicks open. You smiled at the view of his back as he jogs a little to cross the street to get to his son. He gestured for the little one to wait until he gets there. They’re like a big and small pair. Koya jumps into his father’s arm and you could tell that Namjoon was grateful for those hours at the gym. Koya is 30 kilograms at the age of 7 and chances are he is going to lose all that weight by 10. Then he is going to grow taller. He is already taller than most of his friends. And then you will have to deal with two towers at home.

After art classes, it is important for Koya to take a nap. Brains that rest well, work well. He doesn’t even have any do’s-and-don’ts, he eats literally anything, studies when he wants, watches TV. So, while all parents fret on what their kids eat, how many hours they watch TV, when they study, you never had to worry all of that. In your principles, kids should be kids and in a way that is acceptable by the society.

They shouldn’t be on the phone for hours. They should be doing things what 7-year olds should do. And you’re lucky that Namjoon, sometimes agrees with you. One of his arguments was that the phone was one of the greatest technologies ever made and now, you can observe the movement of the planet through an app.

In his words, “Isn’t that cool!” Blinding smile, twinkling eyes, all the fiasco.

Namjoon carries Koya in from the backseat, took off his shoes, socks, and lay him down on his space rocket bed. While you escaped to the showers, Namjoon shed his jacket and sat on the edge of his office desk, reviewing documents to be sent in order to self-sponsor his child. His silhouette forms, the orange sky behind him looking picturesque as he flips the pages slowly, taking to terms everything he needed to know.

You by now have reclined to the door sill on your sides with your arms crossed and a faint smile on your lips, boring into the view of him.

“Love,” you called.

Namjoon jerks his head up, hanging his jaw, mumbling, “...two hundred seventy-five thousand,” and registers that you have mentioned his pet name, “yes?”

“I was just thinking,” you thwarted further into his home office, to the two-seater sofa he has and sat, “Is this the right thing to do?” You looked up at him, briefly, not long enough for him to decipher your thoughts, “Sending our baby off to a system they say, made for children like him? Why do they make it sound like he’s different?”

“How do we know that we,” you paused and try to rephrase your sentence so it sounds right, but no matter how you switch the words, it sounds wrong, “You and I both know what it’s like to be in the system, the pressure, the title of a genius, the weight of the word. Koya’s just 7...”

Namjoon turns over his shoulder, sets the documents down on the desk, and rubbed the back of his neck, tutting his tongue.

“What if he ends up resenting us? The way we did with our parents, for sending us both to a special school and giving us depression before we even turned 12. All because we have the family’s name to live up to.”

Namjoon moves from the desk, to circle the mahogany coffee table, and to the seat next to you.

“You heard him yourself that he wants to go to this school, that he wanted this curriculum. You heard yourself that his teachers cannot,” he shut his eyes and re-phrased, “do not, have anymore materials to teach him because he was beyond that level of intelligence,” Namjoon covered your knees with his palm.

“I don’t want him to feel that his intelligence is the only thing that defines him.”

“That’s why we need to send him there, so they’ll teach him!” He rejoiced. But no matter what, you can’t deny the weariness in your heart. You were worried that a system different from others, will make him the odd one in the bunch. You for instance, cheated on your IQ test so that you scored lower than the initial ones because you heard your parents plan. Namjoon didn’t do his IQ test until he was in middle school and he narrowly escaped from attending a more specific curriculum for the gifted.

“Let’s give this a try, for the hell of it,” his voice softens.

“This is your son’s future,” you darted, poking his chest.

You stood up, abruptly. Namjoon pushes his tongue to cheek.

“I’m going to my parents, don’t wait up,” you shouted from the door. Namjoon hangs his head low.

“She was the one being all ‘my son needs to have this scholarship, fuck your protocols and shit’ and now, she’s not even sure,” Namjoon lifts his ass off the couch, mumbling to himself. But you change your mind like you change your clothes when it comes to what’s best for others. Because you know for a certain, while you put your earrings that evening, it’s your son who will have to deal with the aftermath. And any decisions made, in place of him, is your responsibility. And you know this, because Namjoon isn’t always going to be around for a discussion.

You will be left raising Koya alone most of the time.

Namjoon has to leave by midnight, and he’s unsure if you really need to be at your parents today. He didn’t think you should, but you sounded so certain that anything he says would be best thrown in the bin before it leaves his mouth.

He clears his throat, “Helsinki is tonight, just so you know— “

“—I know,” you put on your perfume, and rubbed your wrist together, looking at him through the mirror.

“I thought you might have forgotten— “

“—I won’t be out long, I just needed some clarity, some kind of foundation that I’m doing something right,” you explained, slipping your phone into your back pocket, brushed your shoulder against your husband as you walked out.

Two weeks after that conversation, Hyun, which was Koya’s actual name, was colouring in his colouring book when he said, “Mom, do you know that goldfish has an attention span of only 9 seconds?”

“No, baby. I didn’t know that,” you lied, you knew.

Hyun continued to colour, moving his head to the other side, “I got that fact from you, actually,” he passed.

Maybe Namjoon was right. Maybe you were underestimating your kid by thinking you know best. Maybe you’re afraid of something that hasn’t happen yet. Either way, as you pan out to the view outside the Trimage Apartment, where the skies are a concoction of lilac and pink, you prayed someone else would take the wheel.

“How come you do not know when your own husband is coming back?” Your mother nags you, as you held the door open for her.

“Because he would tell me if I needed to know. Chances are, he doesn’t even know when he’ll be back, so why bother asking?” You plopped on the sofa next to her.

“It feels like you’re doing this all on your own, by the looks of it...” she passed, looking around your apartment, scanning for whatever is out of place.

“What drinks do you want, ma?” You asked, already off the couch and speeding towards the kitchen, “Tea? Juice?”

“Juice sounds great,” she passed, “I came to keep you company, because I heard from your dad that Namjoon wasn’t around...”

“Aww, is it really because of that or are you bored of seeing dad pick his nose,” you chuckled.

“I don’t need to answer that,” your mom grimaced.

Hours after she came, while Hyun is away for a camping trip, you sat down with her, watching Pretty Women. Her favourite movie.

“You know, when you were younger, you showed incredible talent in academics and memory. Your dad and I were panicking, because when the doctor say it was above average, the reading, checking 6 out of 6 types of intelligence, we literally don’t know what to do...”

You lay your head on her lap this time, curled in a ball and to the side. You hummed in reply.

“I know you cheated on your IQ test thinking I’ll send you off to a boarding school if you did well, and although I think you were capable of it, I wasn’t ready to let you go despite what your father said,” she continued in a soft gentle voice.

It was then she revealed that all she wanted was for you to study at your own pace, at your own capability, without her interfering—or telling you that you’re made for something much better, much more difficult than this. For awhile, she thought what she did was right. Honing your mind by suppressing them. But she sometimes wished that she had went the other way. That she should have seen you for what you are without you fearing anything, without you over-calculating.

“I for sure, don’t know how Namjoon was raised, but I think when it comes to this, his mother is a more eligible person to be asked,” she pats your head. And your eyes bore into the screen at the view of Julia Roberts dazzling smile, not sharing the joy she had.

But rather, the insecurity of it all.

Miles away, several countries apart was Namjoon sitting in his black Sedan, waiting for his driver to get him where he needs to be next. While he waits, he scrolls down the missed call list, his wife in a good 17 of it.

He knows Hyun is away for a stargazing camp. He knows that his wife is still unsure about the curriculum. And he knows that he is running out of comfort words to present to his worry-wart wife. Some things are best unplanned. And some things are best waited out. His logical mind versus your soft heart—a familiar battle.

The moment you picked his calls up, he said, “We’ve been through this many times. We have had conversations and we’re running in circles of whether or not our son is capable of what he is capable of. And I say yes, while you say no. Harbouring all sorts of feelings, by staying on your side and I’m staying on mine and I think it’s safe to say that we both are sick of it—and I...”

“You’re right,” that isn't the retaliation he expected? That rare sound of defeat. He was so stunned he couldn’t even process it all in a string of a second. His wife, hot-headed butch of a wife say that he was right? Is this real? Is this even the right number? Yes, it’s his wife. He checked to be sure. Twice.

“You’re right, I’m overthinking it. I’m making my past as my son’s future, implying my fears as his, and see myself in him when he is himself,” you sighed into the phone.

“And I think, we will take him out only if he says he wants out, which he isn’t,” you added, “It’s hard when he looks up at me because I see myself. I forgot that you see that too. I mean,” you chuckled short, “Who else knows how to raise a kid smarter than yourself?”

“Babe, I love you. I’m catching the first flight home, and this time, I’m coming home when I say I am.”

The plane’s wing slices through the night sky.

“And our family will be whole again.”

Namjoon is poking toy swords into the air, next to you.

“Focus, Kim,” you scolded, “We came to find Koya’s birthday present, not yours.”

“I already got my birthday present,” he shot back, “I’m looking at her.” You turned to him to see a sleazy smile and a wink.

“If you do that again, I’m going to actually hurl something at your head,” you warned, “There’s something about you Virgos.”

“Well, like it or not, you’ve married a Virgo. The damage is done,” he then proceeds to make machine-gun sounds.

“What do you buy for a 7-year old genius?” You hummed.

“Whatever 7-year olds likes,” he wiggles his eyebrow and showed the very sword he was holding.

So that’s how you got three swords home. Not sure if this a blessing or a curse. But the smile on those two faces, what else can be better than this.

Fuck standard operating procedures. Fuck protocols.

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copyright © 2019 namjoonchronicles do not repost

[feliciamontagues]

My Ranking of Every Hercule Flambeau Episode (S01-S08)

There are some spoilers for S7 and S8, but they are fairly vague and pretty much the sort of thing that you might see on the official press release. So not true spoilers as such. Also this is totally subjective and the result of my own personal biases. It’s also behind the cut because it’s looooonnng. 

8. The Two Deaths of Hercule Flambeau (s06e10)--

So, this episode is *fine*. It’s hardly the worst episode of the show, but it’s easily the weakest of the Flamby eps, despite their being a few isolated moments I enjoy. (Hercule getting a long overdue bedroom scene for one :P)

My main gripe is with this episode is the uneven way Lisandra Flambeau is written. The script seems to flip-flop over whether we are supposed to find her sympathetic or not.  On one hand,  many scenes imply that she genuinely loves Hercule despite them having a shotgun marriage after only a few days of knowing each other. On the other hand, she does not hesitate for a minute before poisoning an innocent (Fr. B) for no other reason than to hurt Flamby, which makes her lose a lot of sympathy points.

And as a result, it seems to make Flambeau seem like more of arse than normal for betraying her, while somehow also absolving him of responsibility for doing so, because she turns around and does *THAT.*

And ngl, it does make me a little uncomfortable that while the character of Lisandra (as an Italian) is possibly not meant to be interpreted as a POC, the actress portraying her definitely is. (Sara Martins is of Afro-Portuguese descent).  Which makes the uneven characterization (and underwritten-ness) seem even more glaring, especially  when compared to that of the other (white) women in Flambeau’s life (his first love Rebecca and his daughter Marianne, arguably Lady Felicia as well). It just leaves a bad taste in my mouth even if  in all likelihood, the part wasn’t written with Sara Martins in mind.

I think a much more interesting approach to Lisandra would be to have intending to betray Flambeau all along. Maybe she had her own agenda for seducing Flamby, meanwhile he thinks he’s the one using her for his plan. Maybe she does develop some feelings for him along the way, but it only makes her hesitate for a moment before going ahead with her original plan. That way, she keeps her agency and isn’t reduced to the “woman scorned” stereotype while also leaving the writers free to ship Flamby with others in the future without seemingly endorsing guilt-free adultery .

Other random note: I can’t take  parts of this episode seriously because the “Crown of Lombardy” is very obviously Guinevere’s crown from BBC Merlin with no attempt to alter or disguise it. 

7. The Daughter of Autolycus (s04e05)--

Not gonna lie, I am not really a fan of “character has long lost relative that we’ve never heard of until now” plots. And that goes double when said long-lost relative is a child or sibling. As such my low ranking of this episode is partly due to unconscious personal biases against that trope.

That being said, if we had to get a long-lost relative that we’ve never heard of until now plot, I’m so glad we got Marianne--even if it takes her another episode to really live up to her potential. 

I have to knock off a few more points for Nero Hound as a villain. For one thing, he was played by Nancy Carroll’s real-life hubby, but they didn’t let let him interact with Lady F at all. Such a *waste.*  Also Nero Hound is far too similar a name to Nero Wolfe, and I’ve definitely confused them on more than one occasion). He’s also rather generic in my opinion, even compared to some of Flambeau’s other “generic mobster” rivals/associates like the ones in S8.

However, there are some moments in this episode I genuinely like--particularly the theft “imagine spot” and Flambeau’s bishop disguise in general. Plus, the scenes where Flambeau and Marianne appear together are excellent, as are the hints that Marianne will become a redemptive trigger in Flambeau’s life.

6. The Judgement of Man (s03e10)--

Again, the low ranking of this one may be due to personal biases.  In this case, I’m still low-key bitter--five years later-- at the BBC marketing department for baiting me with the idea of Flambeau actually interacting with the rest of the squad (esp romantic tiems with Lady F)  and then giving me the absolute minimum of Felicia/Flambeau flirting and no Flambeau/Sid and Flambeau/Mrs. M interaction.

But there are other reasons why this is in my bottom 3 Flambeau episodes. 

Honestly, I feel like an equally compelling episode about the Vatican’s complicity in Nazi art theft could’ve been made without having to insert Flambeau in it. I mean I suppose it does make sense to have the art thief character  in the art episode, but still I feel like both Flambeau backstory and important historical lesson about Nazis, the Church, and Jewish art suffer from being crammed into the same episode. 

That being said, Mrs. McCarthy’s duchess disguise in this episode cleared my skin, watered my crops, etc, which is why I’ve ranked it higher than the previous two. 

5. The Folly of Jephthah (s08e05)

It loses a few points because I got very exited about the idea of Marianne becoming Bunty’s thief gf cool new friend, and yet in the episode itself, they only shared one scene and didn’t really interact much in it. That being said, I did like like that Bunty and Mrs. M had a bigger role in this episode than the squad usually gets in Flambeau episodes. 

Overall, I feel this episode works a lot better than most of the other “backstory-heavy” Flambeau episodes, because we’ve already gotten the Marianne-related exposition out of the way and can focus more on allowing her character, Flambeau’s and their relationship with each other to develop.

I’m also a bit smug in that I predicted (or at least hoped for) this exact character arc for Marianne within a few weeks of “The Daughter of Autocylus” airing and that my hopes came to fruition so beautifully.

It doesn’t particularly impact the ranking too much, but I do feel like this episode deserves a special shout out, because it has established a (hopefully-continuing!) pattern of Father Brown calling Flamby  almost exclusively by his first name, which is a major significant step in their bromance and deserves recognition as such. 

4. The Blue Cross (s01e10)--

As someone who was first exposed to Father Brown through reading the stories for a college course, I always find it especially interesting to look at the episodes that were adapted from Chesterton. 

This episode is neither the most faithful book-to-show adaptation (which is probably “The Three Tools of Death”) nor is it the best (imo “The Sign of the Broken Sword’) , but it is arguably the most significant. “The Blue Cross” was the first ever Fr. Brown story and is probably the most well-known. It’s also the first real look we get at the character of Flambeau, who (in the stories and arguably the show as well) is probably the closest thing we get to a clear character arc.

The show keeps some of the important elements of the short  story: Flambeau’s clergyman disguise, the switching of the packages. But it also has the challenging task of upping the relatively low stakes of the story, as well as introducing a major recurring character that resembles his book counterpart but remains distinct enough to justify the fairly different direction show canon is taking him. 

The show does this reasonably well--if not particularly imaginatively. I do enjoy some of the touches (I’ve written an entire meta before about Flamby’s reading material on the train and how it relates to his character)--particularly the show’s choice to have Flambeau fixated on religious art specifically (RIP for Flambeau’s Dairy Company though. It will always live in my heart).

Unfortunately in the adaptation, loses a few points for not really using the show-original characters particularly effectively. It loses still more for Flambeau’s characterization in this episode . He comes across as much more  serious and menacing in this episode than in all the others. It works okay when we consider this as a standalone episode but provides some glaring Early Installment Weirdness when we compare it to other episodes. 

3. The Penitent Man (s05e15)--

So as the rest of this list  will testify, I have strong preference for the “fun” Flambeau episodes over the more series ones. This is the exception that proves the rule--the  serious, cerebral, melancholy episode that simply “works” for me in the way that some of the others have not.

A lot of it is due to the more-intense-than-usual Flambeau character focus that goes into this. Sure, we’ve met his (presumably ex-by-now) wife, his daughter, and his first love by this point, but all of those episodes focused primarily on Flambeau as an extension of the relationships with others. (”The Judgement of Man”  in particular is far more Rebecca’s story than Hercule’s.)

Whereas this episode is very definitively focused on Flambeau himself and allows more nuanced exploration of two of the most defining facets of Flambeau’s character:  (1) his fascination with religion--and spiritual salvation in particular--  as  something he seems to resist and crave in near equal measure  (2) his almost masochistic streak of recklessness.

Even though Flambeau’s supposed “piety” is revealed to be all part of his heist plan, there are strong hints that his desire for redemption and atonement are at least somewhat genuine, even if he is not  ready to pursue them just yet. 

Off topic, but a few random things of note in this episode: this episode all-but-confirms bi!Flambeau, wet!Flambeau at the end is extremely relevant to my interests, Father Brown attempts to smuggle Flamby a lock pick from the beginning and has the audacity to say “ I only use it when I get locked out of the presbytery.”

Also, it has this iconic exchange:

Goodfellow: What is that awful smell?

Father Brown (covered in sewage): It’s me

2. The Honorable Thief (S07e10)-- So nearly all of the Flambeau-centered episodes from S3 on  have been a little preoccupied with filling in some of the gaps in Flambeau’s backstory, which is *fine*, but honestly, I feel like in doing so, they’ve really lost sight of why we fell in love with the character in the first place. 

 He’s vibrant and clever and funny and over-the-top. But most importantly, Flambeau is a lot of fun. Therefore, it follows that episodes that feature him should be a lot of fun too. 

And well... they are all fun in some way,  but they aren’t as fun as they really could be. John Light is insanely charismatic, but charisma can only go so far when the episode in question is a downer.

Fortunately, this episode is the furthest thing from a downer imaginable. It’s absolutely delightful from start to finish. The plot is serious enough to keep things engaging, but also light enough to keep us from getting too distracted by angst. 

I’m also incredibly biased in favor of this episode, because it finally gave me the Felicia/Flambeau ship tease I’d been passionately hoping for (if not really expecting to get after “The Judgement of Man” disappointed me). But it was so much and so good, and I wasn’t ready for it.

In a broader sense though, this episode really delivered with Flambeau/squad interaction in general--which was a key component that has been missing from most of the other episodes. And the Father Brown & Flambeau interactions were also has heartwarming and funny as they always are.

If I have one tiny little gripe with the episode, it’s that Daniel is not Sid. He has enough broad similarities with Sid that I can’t help but wonder if the episode was originally written with Sid and then hastily re-written when Alex Price couldn’t return. That being said, he was a likable enough guest character in his own right, and I wouldn’t mind seeing him again.

1.  The Mysteries of the Rosary (S02e05)-- Perfection. Not only is this THE definitive Flambeau episode, but is also one of the best episodes of the show overall. It has everything: the birth of bearded Flamby, bromantic road trips, a treasure hunt, great guest turns from Anton Lesser and Sylvestra Le Touzel.

I think part of the reason this episode resonates so strongly with me is that it’s really the first proper sense that we get of Show!Flambeau as a character. Sure we officially met him in “The Blue Cross,” but considering he didn’t show up until halfway through the episode and was in disguise for most of it, we didn’t really get much of a sense of who he is.

This episode changes all that and sets Flambeau up as the character we will know and love for the rest of the series--charming, urbane, funny, passionate, a carefree carpe diem exterior masking (or overcompensating for?) a sense of uncertainty and conflictedness.

Somewhat off topic, but as great an episode as this is for Flambeau’s character, it is nearly as wonderful for both Sid and Father Brown’s characters. We get to see Sid’s  ease with Father Brown, the casual camraderie that the two of them have--as well as Sid’s protectiveness (and jealousy) when Flambeau decides to gatecrash their bromantic road trip. 

Honestly, there are so many things that are great about this episode that I don’t think I could possibly list them--but one little detail that really struck my the last time I watched was that the first proper glimpse we see of Flambeau in this episode (we see him in shadow in a flashback before) involves him  saving Father Brown’s life.  Whereas the last proper glimpse we see of Flambeau is after Father Brown has saved Flambeau’s life.  Thematic reversals. Cinematic parallels. We love to see it. 

[militant-holy-knight]

Benioff and Weiss Were Always Hacks: You Only Noticed Now

Or why you should be worried for the future Star Wars movies made by them

(Disclaimer: this blogpost contains spoilers for Game of Thrones)

With only two episodes left for the series to reach it’s conclusion and the announcement for future Star Wars movies in the horizon made by David Benioff and D.B. Weiss (henceforth referred to as D&D for simplicity sake), not many fans seem to be excited about it as they should due to the creative choices taken in regards to the final season of Game of Thrones. Speaking as a GoT fan, I used to enjoy the show a lot and I believe it reached it’s peak on Season 4 and started to go went downhill on Season 5. If D&D were in charge from the beginning what happened?

D&D’s job was always to adapt the book series by George R. R. Martin, which means any merit to the show’s writing can be attributed largely to Martin while D&D were only fit for it to make it work into a tv show - which is still laudable in it’s own right because there are things in the books that still wouldn’t translate too well into the show. In any case, they did their job well from Season 1 to Season 4 which adapted the first trilogy in the series. Even though there are still five books in total released at the time, Season 5 is where they started to run out of material to adapt because some storylines didn’t find their proper conclusion and they needed to come up with their own unique deviations.

Season 5 is considered by many fans to be the low point in the series because of it’s extremely low pacing and controversial liberties taken: the biggest ones have to be the Dorne subplot because that meant axing popular book character Arianne Martell, Stannis Baratheon turning irredeemable evil and paying with his life and Sansa’s marriage to Ramsay Snow leading to her rape, which is still a very hot button among the fandom to this day (and understandably so). Season 5 did have some moments like Hardhome which showed the strength of the true villain of the series, the Night King, the leader of the White Walker invasion who brings winter with him. He is the Thanos-like menace who is teased since the very start of the show with the very first scene opening with a White Walker killing some Night Watch’s rangers and warning us about the danger he represents.

Season 6 fixed some of these problems by giving a more dynamic pacing and build it up with the Battle of the Bastards as the climatic encounter instead of something completely anti-climatic like Season 5′s finale where Stannis Baratheon’s forces were liquidated by the Boltons offscreen. But still, it was an entire season wasted to fix another one’s problems and it still had some individual problems. 

And then Season 7 came along and it all went to waste. I wouldn’t say it was as bad as Season 5 because at least shit happened and it wasn’t boring, but it was still full of groan-worthy moments like trying to force some romance between Jon Snow and Daenerys Targaryen which doesn’t work because they have no chemistry and they are related by blood, curing Jorah Mormont who has been infected with a dangerous disease that will turn him into a snow zombie by simply cutting out the infected area, and of course lest we forget the Wight Hunt in Episode 6 “Beyond the Wall” which broke all suspension of disbelief. Lemme sum it up for you what happens in that episode so you can get the idea and let me put up a map so you can get it from reference.

The heroes come up with the idea to capture an Wight and bring it South to convince Cersei to from a truce.

The travel by boat to the Wall from their base on Dragonstone.

After reaching the Wall, they walk into the land beyond it to find a wight.

They find one and send one of their members back to ask reinforcements having to sprint a indeterminate distance.

The team gets surrounded by the Night King’s army in a frozen lake for a indeterminate amount of time.

The allies at the Wall send a raven back to Dragonstone requesting help.

Daenerys summons her dragons to fly to the land beyond the Wall to rescue the heroes.

They are fighting to the last against the advancing horde of the Night King just before Daenerys arrives in a triumphant moment to save them.

And all of this happens like... Within a hour apparently. Several days should have taken place between this exchange but time moves at the speed of the plot, but D&D seem to be relying on emotional torque to get viewers to ignore all internal logic and be mindblown by the crowning moments of awesome. And this is the core issue with their writing.

D&D write their scenes the same way they film sex scenes apparently, hoping that the emotional moments will make the audience be carried over. Thing is... I realized this after thinking up about many moments in the past. Hardhome was one such example in Season 5 to make up for its abhorrent dullness and even Season 6 wasn’t safe from this. For example, remember how Rickon Stark died just so he could provoke Jon Snow to act irrationally and spur him into conflict? Why didn’t Rickon run in zig-zag when Ramsay began firing arrows at him? Why did he run into a straight line? Did these writers not watch Prometheus to learn their lessons from it’s mistakes? This problem was carried over in Season 8 and amplified a lot in the Long Night. Many people pointed out the several military blunders made by the protagonists when fighting against the Night King’s army.

I could talk about the moronic choice to film everything in absolute darkness and make it impossible to see shit.

I could talk about how idiotic it was to waste your cavalry against the enemy bulwark.

I could talk about how they didn’t create trenches with tar or use fire for more effective manner against the undead.

But I’d rather talk about that moment.

Arya killing the Night King.

You know at first I was okay with that because:

I wasn’t being a fan of Jon Snow in a long time.

Arya wasn’t a Mary Sue, had skills that justified her, so I could buy it better.

But the more I thought about it, more I came to the realization that it was a wrong choice all along.

Arya never had any investment in killing the Night King. She was a character defined by a list of people she wanted to kill including the Freys, Cersei, Joffrey and others.

Arya was trained as an assassin yes... But her training in Season 5 and 6 was very lackluster. She spent some time doing menial works, impersonating some people and trying to spill some poison on someone’s drink. She never learned invisibility, teleportation or any other cool shit.

And most importantly... Melisandre predicting that Arya would shut down “blue eyes” way back when they met in Season 3. If she sensed she was always destined to kill the Night King why did she ever support Stannis? Why did she even support Jon Snow? She even referred to him as the Prince that was Promised. Some fans can try to spin this as much as they want, but it breaks the plot retroactively very hard.

The actress herself didn’t think she deserved it

Of course all of these things were ignored by a large part of the fanbase, more specifically the “woke” crowd because YAS QUEEN SLAY. Little did they know that the very next episode would force them to eat a real shit sandwich when “The Last of the Starks” seemed to turn the narrative against Daenerys Targaryen by turning her into the Mad Queen, killing her handmaiden Missandei and setting up Jon to be the next King of Westeros. Not helping matters is that a series of leaks not yet confirmed as of the time of writing were released prior to the episode (but I personally feel they were legitimate due to some specific things but that is not the point) which sent many Daenerys fans into panic mode.

Speaking as someone who really doesn’t like Daenerys Targaryen, I can actually sympathize with them at some level because this shift appears to be very sudden specially now that the authors favored her more until this very moment. Some viewers can argue that there were always signs like her burning the Tarlys for refusing to bend the knee, which I personally took issue with before but it never really came across as the sign of an insane ruler since she offered very valid rebuttals. It all seemed like the plot was tailored to take her side no matter what and I considered Dany a Mary Sue. But just because they seem to be turning her into a villain now, it doesn’t make me hate the story any less.

Now... I spent an inordinate amount of time bitching about Game of Thrones and if you are an Star Wars fan that doesn’t know anything about it, you might be lost to anything I am writing. Well I needed to give an proper context to both GoT and SW fans since those seem to overlap now and give you a warning because Star Wars seems to be more lost now than ever. D&D were never particularly good writers, they were incoherent about continuity, care more about spectacle over substance and seem to share a thing about subverting the audience’s expectations like a certain Ruin Johnson who succeeded in completely ruining a franchise like there was no tomorrow. The key difference between D&D and Ruin is that the duo doesn’t share the same flippant attitude or picking up fights with fans on Twitter - on the contrary, D&D understand the power of fanservice even if it means daggling the metaphorical shining keys in front of the audience. 

As we come close to Game of Thrones conclusion, I have a feeling that nobody will truly come out satisfied with it should the story take the direction that we are really dreading. I’ve seen interviews about how Emilia Clarke sounds really sad and deflated, seemed like she was really disappointed with how the show ended. Whatever happens, the blame can be laid on the feet of Benioff and Weiss for their frankly baffling creative decisions. This season has been disappointing through and through with two or three episodes being needlessly long and filler to booth and to make matters worse, it was supposed to end earlier than 10 episodes. Why did they need to rush it and yet fill the series with so much dead air?

Now can you imagine a Star Wars movie made by them? With all these things I listed? The next trilogy is already dated, we don't know if it's D&D or Ruin Johnson yet. We are talking about a couple of writers that have no sense of realistic scale, continuity or logic, but rely on cheap emotional tricks to have the audience invested until they begin thinking about it. I would laugh until I was sick if this season turns everyone against those two fuckwads that Disney changes their mind about putting them in charge. If the world was a just place, this is what would happen at least.

[wolf-in-a-suit]

Nursing care

Show: The Dragon Prince

Summary: General Amaya is a woman of action, not lying around idly while others do the work for her! Having fought many foes and endured torture, at the hands of quite a few of them, she also prides herself for her perseverance. However, throw into the mix: Ezran, a horse, an overbearing Harrow and a smug arch mage and you get a General at the end of her rope. Enjoy.

A/N: This is my very late contribution to @tdpweek with the prompt ‘car accident’. Seeing as this is a fantasy show I decided a horse accident is more befitting and resumed to torture our loved General Amaya.

My other two imagines for tdpweek are: The Pastry Assassination (featuring Viren x Amaya, Harrow, Claudia, Ezran and Callum) and Regret.(Claudia, Soren and Viren)

A stark breeze ruffled trees, fall had already painted them in various color schemes. Their falling leaves posed an invitation to get lost in the forest's tranquil embrace. Marking the retreat of summer, the last rays of a setting sun left warm traces on the approaching rider's faces. The clacker of hooves was muffled by thick earth and left the serene mood undisturbed.

Amaya closed her eyes and breathed it all in; the thick earthy scent and the oncoming crisp whisper of winter was carried as a promise by the wind. Here she felt complete: Horseback and on an uncharted trail only she knew. Her muscles uncoiled as she relaxed for the first time in weeks. No disturbances, mortal danger, or recruits clanking around in their heavy armor... just this.

"Hey, aunt Amaya look what I can do!"

Well, it had been relaxing as long as it lasted. The General turned around just to stare at her nephew Callum sitting on his horse grinning over both ears. Next to him Ezran's gelding was... showcasing a disturbing lack of Ezran. Her eyes widened in panic, while her hands began whipping through the air in hectic movements. Callum’s hands rose as well. "Don't worry, he's right there." Amaya shifted her weight in the saddle to peer to the mentioned side of Ezran's steed. Sure enough, the future ruler of the kingdom was clawed to the side of the saddle like a spider, his white teeth gleaming in triumph.

The reprimanding brisk moves of his aunt's hands did little to dampen his enthusiasm. "It's alright, Hector won’t let me fall. Right?" The small boy crawled further up the animal’s neck and peered lovingly into it's warm brown eyes. However, Hector seemingly wasn't prepared for the massive squirrel suddenly flashing onto the road.

Three seconds.

It took Hector about three seconds to determine that: Yes, he was in mortal danger and no: a Prince clawing at his neck did little to boost his confidence in being able to battle this outlandish fiend. So, he did the only sensible thing: Whickering and kicking, while he turned around galloping down the dirt road.

"Ezran!" Callum was frozen to the spot, all he was able to do was scream for his little brother who hung onto his steed's neck for dear life.

With each massive jump of the animal the thought of 'This is it!' whipped through Ezran's head with the speed of the trees blurring by. His hands ached and lost more and more of their death grip on Hector's mane. Surely, this was his end. He would be crushed under the heavy hooves and trampled, if not he would break his neck on impact. He closed his eyes while he felt the last of his strength slip and gravity’s inevitable pull take hold.

Suddenly, a new pair of trapping hooves led the boy to snap his eyes open again. Just in time to see his aunt launch like a tiger from her own horse, still running at break neck speed and snatch him out of the air. Her big frame engulfed his tiny figure in midflight and then-

They crashed, very hard. The scrapping of armor on stone and the horrifying breaking of bones was followed by an even more unsettling silence.

The next thing Amaya's fuzzy brain registered was pain. A lot of it. It was followed by the face of Viren looming over her prone form - as if the physical pain wasn't enough.

"Congratulations General, you managed to break your leg and quite a few of your ribs. Not counting the really impressive consortium of bruises and scrapes. I'd say this deserves at least a place under your top three injuries. Wouldn’t you agree?" Lord Viren's face was a mixture between smug and annoyed. Amaya's answer came in swift movements. "She's saying that-" Callum’s translation was briskly interrupted by the mage himself: "'If you're so ecstatic about treating my wounds, perhaps you should send in one of your other mages?' Yes, I know!" Now, the annoyed expression definitely took over his features.

"And miss prescribing the General Amaya bed rest and forbidding her from attending her duty for the next weeks? I think not." At the woman's horrified face a smirk stretched his thin lips. 'You're enjoying this far too much.' Amaya signed furiously. "You're quite mistaken, for I am but a humble servant." His mocking bow brought rise to the General's notorious scowl. However, Viren seemed immune to it’s effect. "Do enjoy your time with your family my dear." A mischievous and knowing gleam filled his eyes as he opened the door to her certain doom.

In stumbled a crying Ezran "Aunt Amaya, I am so sorry!”, a concerned Gren "How are you General? Is there anything I can do?" and worst of all: A very, very deeply worried brother in law: King Harrow. "I'll tell the servants to make your room better accessible at once and... and to carry you there. Wait! I'll carry you myself!" The former quiet room was filled by a jumble of voices: Apologies, suggestions and plans flew through the air and Amaya felt like she was caught in a Hurricane of epic proportions. The door, her only escape route, was blocked by a highly amused Lord Viren. Although, she supposed in her current state any escape attempt would be cut short by this pack of hungry wolves calling themselves family.

"Amaya is the cushion really comfortable enough?" Without waiting for a response Harrow dove into the next room like he was leading an army into battle. A few seconds later he emerged with about six new cushions in hand. An over eager Ezran lifted her feet in order to make room for the offending objects. Though, at the pained look on her face dropped her broken leg instantly, - which in turn led her to a silent howl. "I am so sorry! I'll get you something!"

There was simply no telling what the Prince would drag along this time. So far a tower of strawberry pastries, books- now sporting suspiciously red stains and a dagger was erected right next to her. Bait peering grumpily from the top at the commotion. It was just her luck that her brother in law had witnessed the scene unfold and was now franticly searching for a solution. By all the gods in this realm, what did she do to deserve this punishment!?

An unsuspecting Callum rounded the corner as he was suddenly seized and shaken by the King. "Callum, go get some more of the pain numbing potion from Viren. Be quick about it." And off was the last remaining sensible part of her family, oh joy.

With precise and swift moves Viren dropped the Corus fly’s wings into the cauldron and started a low incantation. "Naip feiler w..." Bam, bam. The rapping on his door let him to groan in frustration. No one informed you beforehand how much of a time consuming business being the father of a witch and a soldier could be.

However, when he opened the door there was no sign of an exasperated Soren or confused Claudia to be found, just the boy. With great effort he stopped his teeth from grinding. "Prince Callum, there is a reason why I am not to be disturbed while in my laboratory. Not even by the King himself!" The boy in turn just managed to drag the minimal amount of socially acceptable shame onto his pale face. "Yes, almost totally forgot... the big sign outside was just, eh... very hard to read?” He finished lamely. At Viren's raised eyebrow he continued: "I need a new potion for Aunt Amaya." "Ah" The mage made a knowing sound. "I take it, due to her family's loving care of her!?"

However, his skilled hands were quick to pour his recent potion into a flask and to press it into the boy’s hands. But instead of scuttling the annoyance eyes narrowed. "Wait, did you just brew this for her? I thought that was the job of the common mages downstairs!?"

"There are also other wounded people requiring my skills, not only the General. Brewing the potion just now was merely a coincidence." There was some light igniting in the Prince's green eyes as he leaned on the stone wall. "I'm curious, why exactly did you learn how to read sign language?" Lord Viren scoffed. „The arch mage and the General of the King’s guard not being able to understand each other in times of conflict? Well, that's certainly a sensible idea. However, as enjoyable as this discussion with you was - as always." the words where drenched in barely concealed annoyance, like one of Ezran's tarts in strawberry jam "I believe there is somewhere you need to be!"

The door banged shut right before Callum's nose, the sign reading ‘Do Not Disturb!’ in bold letters swinging hazardly from one side to the other.

Menacing shadows crept through the moonlit corridors while voices echoed on the cold stone walls, blending to a jumble of incoherent words: “She was just here..”, “Find her!”, “-always like this…”

Sweat shone on her forehead and Amaya needed to take deep breaths to calm herself, she was surrounded by the enemy. One wrong move could mean the end. Leaning heavily on the wooden crutches she tried to move as swiftly and silently across the corridor. The voices gained in volume, they were almost upon her now. Just around the corner. Her panicked gaze snapped back before her at the sound of a heavy door opening.

Out stepped Viren. The mage was astonished at the picture presenting itself. The runaway, searched by all of the court for the last hour, stood before him caught red-handed in escaping King Harrow and his guards. Amaya huffed in annoyance and defeat. Busted, back to the insanity that was Harrow’s understanding of loving care. Viren would never let her live this down. The voices drew even nearer.

A shift in the air made the fugitive look up. Viren had stepped aside, his robes billowing in the air, and mentioned with his raised arm to the open door behind him: Leading into his laboratory. Her brown eyes were torn open in equal amounts of astonishment and wariness. Lord Viren helping her? He always acted as if she was the bane of his existence. Arguing over every small decision or operation plan and more often than not sending her a smoldering glare behind Harrow’s back. This had to be a trick of his; the man did nothing without an ulterior motive in mind.

The man in question sighed, resignation coloring the tone. “Is it so hard to believe that I am capable of genuine sympathy?” Amaya’s hardened expression rendered every word unnecessary. Viren’s eyebrows shifted into his state of the art ‘I-am-not-amused’ mien. “Well then, let’s just wait for our King then. Shall we?”

With seconds to spare General Amaya grabbed her crutches and vanished into the open door.

When King Harrow rounded the corner all he saw was his trusted advisor calmly closing the door to his laboratory, the ‘Do not disturb!’ sign swinging and finally clattering to the ground.

[cutegirlmayra]

Ok, are you still doing Sonamy prompts? 'cause if you are, here's a 'silly' one: Remember how you said you wanted to do an actual GOOD SonamyShad love triangle? Ok. Now, have you heard 'Satisfied' from the Hamilton musical? There, see. Eliza is Amy, but if you want to, you can switch Sonic and Shadow for Alexander or Angelica, you can make Shadow the outcast or you can do a platonic/romantic Sonamy where he is the outcast! (not sonadow) IDK, I just love the feels. :') You're the best!

(x) This lovely preview image was used with permission! Please support the Artist as well~

Yeah, I love that musical! I see Amy as Eliza a lot actually xD But I usually ship Sonamyshad as Sonic and Shadow having feelings for Amy. >////

Prompt:

The drink in his hand wasn’t much of a calming substance.

Long ago, Shadow had begun to feel… stirrings… for Amy, but such things were ‘disagreeable’ with him and his lifestyle. Instead, he kept it bottled up. Didn’t say much about how she made him feel during the time they all did missions together to put an end to a foreign enemy, nor the fact that he had chosen to partner up with her during that time instead of Rouge.

Rouge was the first to pick up a strange ‘attachment’—so to speak— coming from him when it came to Amy Rose. He was quick to interject when roles and aids were being called out, and always strongly enforced that he and Amy were a good balance of brawn and wit.

It was beginning to get controlling though, and although Amy never suspected anything, Sonic’s presence in her life was overwhelming to Shadow… he began to get eerily jealous of Amy’s admiration for him. He became more persistent in being with her, and even went so far as to drive a wedge between the two by keeping Amy away from Sonic…

However, these attempts failed.

Amy was always seeking out Sonic, never realizing Shadow’s harbored feelings, and soon…

Well, the wedding was a surprise.

Shadow clanked the glass down hard on the table, tsk’ing as the merry crowd gathered and cheered at some joke Sonic had said.

Although he respected Sonic… he didn’t owe him any favors.

He quickly gorged in one fatal gulp the rest of the drink, wiping his mouth and prepared to leave with a scowl on his face.

“Hmm?” Rouge, fancied up, moved slightly from Knuckles’s embrace to cock her eyebrow up at his obvious upset exit. “Leaving so soon?”

He only grunted in a sigh.

His eyes narrowed, not liking her eyes on his back, before…

“Alright, alright, alright! Let’s hear it for the lovely couple! And now, a toast!”

A toast?

Shadow stopped a moment, pivoting his head slightly to the side, but not fully looking back just yet. “Odd..” he didn’t think they would start without-

“And here’s the lovely bride now!”

Shadow couldn’t help it. All he needed was to watch a piece of fabric fly by the corner of his eye for the temptation to be too great and turn around to look at her.

He was stunned from head to toe, unable to look away and unable to close his mouth.

The longing to have Sonic never exist grew again… and jealousy turned to envy instantly.

She was beautiful.

Then, Sonic all but disappeared.

So did the party.

The guests.

The tables and it’s over-glorified food and beverages.

He found himself walking after her as if daydreaming, moving parallel but out of sight behind the crowd as he watched her through the slits of their bodies all tightly together in a line to welcome her.

“To the Groom!” To the groom… the groom…

“To the bride!” To the bride… to the lovely bride…

“To their future!” Amy…

“To their union!” To this revelation.

“And the hope that you’ll provide!” This can’t be happening…

Shadow stopped walking as the sides of his face pulled down in utter anguish.

Had he fallen so deeply into this… this fascination with her that he couldn’t even snap himself out of the trance she had on him? Could he really just not walk away? But watch this act be done?

His fists clenched along with his jaw… jagged in a line upon his teeth were the full bearings of his fangs.

“He doesn’t deserve her…” It was so faint, so completely drowned out by the crowd, that not even his own ears could pick up his muttered betrayal.

But someone did see his mouth move.

“Shadow?” Amy turned to look straight through the crowd, lifting a gentle and angelic hand towards him.

“Oh?” The crowd turned, as the announcer from before gestured to Shadow. “Do you have anything to say?”

“…Simply…” he held his head high, realizing he had to now.

Looking at Amy’s eyes… seeing her concern in them…

Did she know?

“…That you always… be satisfied.”

She smiled.

Rewind. “Chaos…” he slowly pulled the Chaos Emerald out, hurriedly walking back and away from everyone, heading outside.

“Control.”

“I remember that night… I just might regret that night for the rest of my days…” Shadow moved through the forest, seeing a weary Amy, struggling to breathe, crawling towards the only safety she could perceive.

He watched her, knowing exactly what he did and responded to her with… and thinking maybe history could repeat itself in a different way this time.

He approached her.

“S..Sonic?”

He felt a twinge of pain.

His face scrunched up, but he lowered himself down as her face moved up to get a better look at him.

“Are you alright?” He was following the script, not sure when to change it.

There’s eyes remained locked as long as Amy could muster them before she collapsed and he picked her up.

“Here.” He gave her something to drink as she gulped it down, hitting her chest a moment as she coughed up smoke.

“Explosion.” She explained with a weak voice. “Thank you… Shadow.”

“Rest. You need it.” He moved the drink away from her and as he did so, lightly brushed his fingers over her hair.

She didn’t notice.

She never did.

It was so secretive, the slight pleasure he obtained from those ‘slide-of-hands’ he all but perfected over the course of time they spent together… but now…

She coughed again, “I’m so lucky you found me…”

He didn’t respond, just helped lift her up more so she could breathe…. Then… leaned her back against his own as he rested upon a stump.

“A pity your hero didn’t find you.” Shadow retorted to, at last, going by his old words, but they held new meaning now.

It wasn’t a silly taunt anymore.

It held so much… more now.

“Hmph. You’re just like me then. I’m never satisfied with my rescues either.”

That triggered something in him, a sudden urge to lean down and claim her his right then and there. A kiss… forbidden and deadly… but could it change fate?

“There’s still a million things I want me and Sonic to accomplish.” She smiled, that same… unyielding smile of total and pure joy.

How could she be so content? With a boyfriend like him!?

Shadow turned away, tsk’ing again, as Amy giggled.

“But just you wait.” She retorted, looking down and away from straight up into his face. She lightly stroked Shadow’s hands around her waist… “I’ll make that Sonic respect me.”

I already respect you.

Shadow looked away, fighting the urge to pull her up further and take hold of her mouth and never give her time to breathe again.

But what good would that do? The second she caught hold of fresh air again, she would run back to her Sonic. Nothing he could do could change that.

The conversation lasted two, maybe three minutes… but it was in that moment that Shadow began to feel something for Amy.

They both played games of wit on their missions. They enjoyed the other’s company. She even got him to smile on more than one occasion.

What did she see in that blue menace?

Then again… currently speaking, with Shadow’s feelings and all, he was the true menace to her ‘happily ever after’…

“Do you ever wonder what would happen if Sonic wasn’t the one you end up with?”

She fidgeted, sweating a little in his arms as she didn’t speak.

She was flying off of hope, and nothing more.

Beautiful… and boy, did she know it.

She played innocent and cute so well… but he saw sides of her that he was sure even Sonic didn’t get a chance to see.

He wanted to take her far away from here, far into his arms and into a void where neither of them could escape from. A place where no ‘Sonic’ existed… but then he looked down to her face, hearing only silence, and watched in humiliating shock with her eyes light up.

“I’m just helpless, you know?”

And truly, he knew she was-

“Helpless?”

Her eyes simply screamed-

“Helplessly devoted to him~” she swooned, melting into Shadow’s arms with sighs as his own twitched and shook uncontrollably.

It didn’t matter. Nothing he did would ever matter to her more than Sonic. More than her own diluted feelings for him.

Then Sonic came.

“Woah! Amy! I finally found you!”

Shadow glared up at him, spooking Sonic slightly as Amy’s face lit up with smitten grandeur at his arrival.

“Sonic!”

“Miss me?”

“Aways!” she coughed then but tried to move out of his grasp.

“..Shadow?”

Shadow continued to hold her.

He closed his eyes, ‘That’s when I realized… three fundamental truths at the exact same time.’

He handed her off to Sonic, who played the charming rescuer even though Shadow did all the work of helping her stay alive.

“I was worried about’cha. You gave everyone quite a scare, Amy.” He smiled warmly down to her, so friendly and full of hidden love she wouldn’t discover until another few years.

“Hehe, worried? Scared? Oh, Sonic!” she wrapped her strong arms around his neck, being careful to be gentle. Something… Shadow knew because she replicated it when he held her through missions as well.

Sonic held her bridal style, the exact same way he did.

So why was it different?

Shadow turned away, fists turning white as the gloves over them before he folded his arms and took a deep breath, turning away from the ‘happy’ couple.

“I miss you all the time! Why can’t you understand that?” she sighed, but Shadow knew from the tone of her voice that she was only playing.

He knew her.

Every gesture and mannerism…

But he wanted so much more than knowledge…

He gritted his teeth again, stifling any noise of aggravation he may make towards them.

Shadow reminded himself that Amy was his first love, that he was an abomination made on the Space Colony Ark, and that was why he let Sonic take her away that day.

Nice going, she was right.

He turned to the two.

He will never be satisfied.

He walked over to them, “What are you doing?” Sonic asked.

Shadow turned him around, “I’m about to change your life.” He stated and gave Sonic a little ‘nudge’ so to speak, “Go take Amy around the lake. Try and be somewhat chivalrous and give her a good time.”

“W-what!?” Sonic’s face lost it’s ‘cool attitude’ and suddenly was in shambles as Amy blushed and looked surprised back at Shadow.

He faked his smile and walked away from the two. “My only job in this life is to protect humanity and let them live out there dreams. So maybe that is why…” He pulled out his chaos emerald.

“I let Amy have her dream…” he was plenty far enough away for Amy and stubborn Sonic with his nose up in the air to avoid Amy seeing any further expression of his embarrassment on his face, although totally applying what Shadow said and giving her a night to remember… one that left Shadow without any chance to climb—but then again— he already knew he had lost.

“Even if she’s clueless.” He smirked, holding the emerald out, “That doesn’t mean… I want her any less.”

He teleported through time back to Amy and Sonic’s wedding, folding his arms as he watched her walk down the isle, Sonic sweating buckets and having to be fanned by Tails’s twin tails just to stay calm and not overheat from anxiety.

Cold feet?

Shadow snickered, before looking away, leaning on the door and not looking back.

“I’d have to be naïve to set her feelings aside,.. it’s just another reason why I-“ he gripped his head, suddenly feeling the rush of sorrow crash inside himself. “Maybe that’s why…” he started to feel a migraine the size of a walnut in his head, only growing bigger as he turned fully away from the scene and covered his face, trying to get some air.

“I gave her to Sonic… Now that’s her groom.”

He looked up through his fingers, glaring.

“Thank you for all the help you’ve done, Shadow.” Amy’s eyes beamed with praise.

He looked down at her hand…

“If it takes fighting a war to be with you…” he grabbed it, dropping down to one knee and surprising her, seeing her blink fast as he kissed her hand. “Then it was worth it.”

Sonic later bent to one knee… shocking her even more… frustrating Shadow even more…

Shadow walked out of the church, “I’ll leave you to it.” He lifted a hand up, dismissing the happy couple, letting Sonic win over himself.

Who was he kidding… Sonic had him beat before Amy even knew of his existence.

Three….

He knew Amy like he knew his own mind by now.

Sonic came out later, basking a minute in the moonlight before Shadow approached him.

“Shadow?” he straightened himself up, seeing Shadow’s demeanor looked off.

“What’s up? The food not good enough for ya? Hehee.” He smiled obviously, as Shadow took a deep breath to calm his rage, and then looked up within the shadows of the darkened trees towards him.

“Take care of her Sonic… you’ll never find anyone as trusting or as kind as Amy Rose…”

“Uhh… I think you mean, Miss The Hedgehog.” Sonic raised an eyebrow. Just as oblivious as her…

Shadow rolled his eyes.

Even he didn’t fully realize Shadow’s feelings for Amy.

He wondered… if he had told Sonic of his feelings… would he have been silently resigned? Would she have been his? Or would he have been lying about being indifferent to it all?

Either way…

If Shadow had succeeded in driving a big enough rift between them, she would have acted content and fine, but she’d obviously be lying as well.

Shadow left then… But deep in the night, when he dreamed or fantasized… It was always her eyes, Maria’s words in her mouth, as she would lean her back against his chest just like that first night… looking up at him…

Even if she never loved him…

At least he kept her eyes in his life…

But he’d never be satisfied.

[attacksoftheclones]

Why We Need to Appreciate Padmé Amidala

In spirit of #SWisagirlthingtoo making its way around Twitter, I thought now would be the perfect time to make a post I’ve been wanting to write for a while. Star Wars up until recently has not given much attention to its heroines, perhaps with the exception of the iconic Princess and General Leia Organa. It is incredibly sad that it has taken this long for the franchise to realise that characters such as Leia, Padmé and Rey (as well as the many animated heroines we have met such as Ahsoka and Hera) have been and will forever continue to be definitive factors in the way many girls have and will grow up.

When it comes to Star Wars, I loved Leia and I love Rey, but they are both not the heroine I connected with. I connected with former Queen and then Senator Padmé Amidala from the highly criticised (although increasingly less so) prequels and then again in the animated series, Star Wars: The Clone Wars. Any Padmé fan knows that loving her as a character most often means you’ll often be told that in the end she did ‘nothing but cry over Anakin’ or is in no way comparable to her daughter, you’ll find it frustrating that no reference is made to her at all following Episode III and you’ll know that she has little to no presence in merchandising even when you are more than willing to throw coins down Disney’s way for her.

But Padmé deserves to overcome all of the above. Padmé constantly has to battle against both what people expected her to be (arguably a Leia clone) and the often restrictive and limiting definitions of what makes a “strong female character”, especially in pop culture. Regardless, here is why Padmé is such an underappreciated and amazing character.

The Phantom Menace:

Padmé is elected queen at 14 years old, a competent and strong leader wise beyond her years. She was educated in public service from an early age, earning the trust of her people after serving as the Princess of Theed and becoming a junior senatorial adviser upon joining the team of Apprentice Legislators from the age of 8.

She is one of the first people to acknowledge and realise the failures of the Republic (“It is clear to me now that the Republic no longer functions”, “Wake up, Senators, you must wake up!”).

She is brave enough to take part in espionage missions in order to allow herself to take part in both negotiations and the action, as well as to keep herself safe.

When the time comes, she is brave enough to reveal herself as the queen even though it is not asked of her.

It is her idea to form the Gungan Alliance and to try retake Naboo herself. She is able to realise that a diplomatic solution is no longer plausible for her home planet and instead of sitting back and ordering action from the sidelines, she fights alongside her people and risks her life in doing so.

She delivers victory, bringing the two species of Naboo together and liberates her people.

Padmé served the full two terms allowed by Naboo’s laws but was so popular as a leader that her people wanted to amend the constitution in order to allow her to remain queen.

Attack of the Clones:

Padmé continues to serve her people as the representative of Naboo in the Galatic Senate, even as her life continues to be threatened and also after she watches her decoy (and friend) die.

Despite more threats to her safety, Padmé is selfless in going with Anakin to Tatooine to try and save his mother as well as wanting to help and rescue Obi-Wan.

Padmé is prepared to put her career first. She denies her feelings for Anakin right until she believes she is going to die on Geonosis and understandably realises that her career does not have to be the only satisfaction in her life. She accepts that she is entitled and allowed to love, even when Anakin does not share the same luxury.

She decides to become committed to hiding her relationship so that she can continue her duties for the Republic as well as attempting to ensure Anakin is not denied his life as a Jedi.

Her every action is not driven by her love for Anakin. She decides to go rescue Obi-Wan when Anakin argues against it and whilst Anakin and Obi-Wan bickered when chained up on Geonosis, she instead took the time to rescue herself and reach higher ground.

Padmé survived the Battle of Geonosis as a clever politician and as a blaster-weilding fighter whilst many other Jedi and trained clones died. She proves again that she can fight.

The Clone Wars:

Padmé essentially becomes a hero through her politics.

We see more of her in action in the Senate, particularly in the episode The Pursuit of Peace where she gives an unforgettable speech. “Who are we fighting for? My people, your people, all of our people. This war is meant to save them from suffering, not increase it. I support our brave soldiers whether they come from the clone factories or from any of the thousands of systems loyal to the Republic… It is our duty and our responsibility to preserve the lives of those around us.” The full version can be found on Youtube.

Padmé continues to be the target of further assassination attempts but continues to expand her power and influence nonetheless.

Padmé cleverly earns the attention of the galaxy’s most important players and is able to come to adaptable and sufficient compromises with them despite differences in beliefs and alliances.

Missions with Ahsoka!!

She again does not let her decisions be influenced or driven by Anakin. When Anakin does not want her to go on a mission he deems to dangerous in the episode Senate Spy, she replies “You’re not going to let me? It’s not your decision to make, it’s mine”. Padmé puts her duty to the Republic first, even when it bothers Anakin on multiple occasions.

She is brave enough to leave Anakin when he violently attacks Rush Clovis, whom she had been previously romantically linked with.

Revenge of the Sith:

Yes, many of her scenes where she is active in the early formations of the Rebel Alliance are cut and we will never forgive George Lucas 5eva. The original ending where she attempts to assassinate Anakin also would have been awesome. This movie is where Star Wars fails Padmé, but her role in it still can not be ignored.

Padmé is able to question the state of the Republic when many around her are too afraid to in fear of accepting what it may truly mean – “What if the democracy we thought we were serving no longer exists and the Republic has become the very evil we’ve been fighting to destroy?”

She recognises that Palpatine has gained too much power in the Senate upon becoming Emperor and reorganising the Republic into the Empire, famously stating “so this is how liberty dies, with thunderous applause”. This leads her to form the early stages of the Rebel Alliance that would ultimately become a deleted scene but should still be considered canon.

Once learning all that Anakin has done, Padmé states that he is “going down a path [she] can not follow”. She is not blinded by love and is able to see his actions for what they are and who he has now become. He ultimately destroyed everything she had worked so hard to preserve.

Whatever way you want to believe Padmé died, she went through unimaginable heartbreak and her emotions should not totally be criticised because her pain will never be understood by most. People also often fail to realise that Padmé’s fate is also that of the Republic. She was fated to die with it as she was symbolic of its spirit. I think it is fair to say that she was never destined to live past the birth of Luke and Leia (despite that one line from Leia in Return of the Jedi which can be argued for) as Vader would never have been fully committed to being Palpatine’s apprentice with Padmé around and her future would have had to have been reduced to one of hiding.

It is Padmé that instills the hope and kindness in Luke that allows him to refuse the dark side and resurface the last bit of humanity left in Anakin/Vader. Luke does not win over his father through combat or power but through embodying the eternal impression of light that his mother left on his father. Like his mother, Luke knows that fighting, or ‘aggressive negotiations’, will not always be the answer. A New Hope is ultimately a product of Padme’s legacy.

I know myself that I would not be the person I am today without my favourite female characters. Through female characters, as girls we can feel as though we have defeated great evils, overcome inner conflicts and sometimes even get to save the boys for a change. We might not be able to pick up a blaster or lightsaber in real life, but we learn it’s okay to take charge and that there is absolutely no reason we should feel ashamed for doing so. We learn that we can aim for and strive for any goal whilst also feeling confident and every bit capable to get the guy on the side if we wish to and that having such feelings should not be seen to diminish our strength in any way.

Padmé carried the weight of her gender throughout the entirety of the prequel trilogy and for that reason alone she was never going to please everyone. She was the new female lead and many hoped she would be a character who was along the lines of being Force sensitive or perhaps even a pilot like Rey. But Padmé’s strength was in being kind when she had every reason not to be and was a force to be reckoned with through her intelligence and diplomacy that helped preserve the security and stability of the Republic for as long as it was able to stand under Palpatine’s manipulative rule. She was the humanitarian the galaxy needed when it began to lose all humanity.

Many people who grew up watching the prequels first probably connect with Padmé more because they never tried to fit her into a mould or an already established idea. But I do hope that fans of any age can come to recognise that Padmé is as worthy of being centre stage in the Star Wars arena as any other female character and I truly hope Forces of Destiny can help bring that about. Of course we need more representation in the Star Wars universe and I will never deny that, but I am lucky enough that I did gain a character from Star Wars that I adore so much. I also appreciate that these female characters can be every bit important to male fans as they are to female fans and any male fan that is able to appreciate our heroines as equal to our heroes is helping fandom and pop culture take a step in a better direction than it has in the past.

[aion-rsa]

Home Alone’s Devin Ratray on Becoming Hollywood’s Ultimate Big Brother Bully, Buzz

https://ift.tt/3q2Rba0

There are Christmas films and then there’s Home Alone.

Released back in 1990, no one really knew what to expect from this low-budget family comedy about a boy forced to defend his house from a pair of bungling burglars after being accidentally left behind from a family holiday.

Yet Home Alone is one of those rare examples of all the stars aligning in Hollywood to create something special. It’s a truly unique Christmas film, both feel-good and immensely funny, rivalled only in that respect by Will Ferrell’s Elf.

There are countless reasons why it remains a festive classic; John Hughes’s script, Chris Columbus’s deft direction, the work of cinematographer Kevin Macat and John Williams’s score are just a few examples.

One that often gets overlooked, however, is Devin Ratray’s Buzz McCallister.

Few actors have succeeded so well in bringing to life all the painfully familiar tropes of the average older brother. Buzz can be mean. His behaviour occasionally borders on bullying. But he’s also funny and, when it comes down to it, has a good heart. 

Ratray’s performance embodies that strange sibling duality perfectly.

Read more

TV

Christmas Movies and TV Specials: Full 2020 Schedule

By Den of Geek Staff

Hughes had written Home Alone with Macaulay Culkin in mind for the role of Kevin, while Columbus was always keen on bringing together the diverse talents of Joe Pesci and Daniel Stern as hapless criminals Harry and Marv.

It was Casting Director Janet Hirshenson who recruited Ratray for the role of Buzz – a role he could never have predicted, 30 years later, he would still be talking about.

“I’m asked about it all the time,” he tells Den of Geek.

“At this time of year, I am asked about it on a daily basis.”

According to Ratray, people tend to fall into one of two distinct categories when it comes to realising he played Buzz in Home Alone.

“People either know me right away or they find out after knowing me for some time. It can be quite a surprise. I don’t look the same as I did when I was 13,” he laughs.

Born in New York to actor parents Peter Ratray and Ann Willis, he had already been acting in movies for four years prior to landing the part of Buzz following a “relatively straightforward audition.”

After an initial meeting with Hirshenson he was invited to a hotel in midtown New York to read for Columbus.

“Chris encouraged me to explore the material. If I felt like throwing in a line or improvising, he wanted me to do that so he could get a better sense of who I was. He made me feel at ease and very comfortable and I walked out feeling quite relaxed. It was a pretty good experience in terms of an auditioning process and just a total joy when I got the part.” 

Ratray is even able to recall what he read for Columbus, more than 30 years later.

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“I remember doing the Old Man Marley speech in Buzz’s bedroom for the audition. I guess it helped that I had memorised it and felt comfortable with the script. I just felt very at ease with Chris Columbus. Maybe he felt that he could work with someone who didn’t come across as nervous on camera. I don’t know what it was but I’m just grateful that I got it.”

Some actors may have been able to draw from their own personal experience when it came to shaping a character like Buzz – plenty of us have been born with older brothers, after all.

But, fortunately for him, Ratray’s formative years were a far more pleasant experience. 

“I have an older brother and there is almost the same age difference as Kevin and Buzz but he and I got along very well growing up. He was nothing like Buzz at all. The exact opposite in fact, so there was no familial inspiration at home.”

Despite his largely negative depiction in Home Alone, the role of Buzz was one that Ratray relished playing and one he had no apprehension about taking on. 

“Up until then I had played either nerds or bullies. Both ends of the spectrum. But playing the bad guy is always more fun and playing a nasty, surly, rude teenage bastard like Buzz was great.”

Ratray has fond memories of life on the set of Home Alone working alongside the rest of the kids that can be found running around the McCallister house at the start of the film.

“We would laugh and joke around. We bonded like brothers and sisters. I don’t recall any fighting at all. I was also a bit older than most so they did treat me like Buzz the older brother but I felt very close with them and we had a pretty good time together.”

Even so, Ratray remembers facing a gruelling schedule of filming and school work on the set of Home Alone.

“It was hard. We had to go school on the set for three hours a day as well as putting in the eight-hour work day. We didn’t have breaks really.”

Occasionally, if there was a break in filming, he would be rushed off into a lesson with one of the private tutors on set. However, if filming resumed within 20 minutes, none of that lesson time would count towards the required three hours of schooling a day.

Despite the intense workload, Ratray has few regrets about being a child actor.

“It was still fun. A tremendous, unique childhood. I enjoyed it all. I only wish in retrospect I had paid more attention to the schooling on set. It made for a difficult transition when I would get back from a movie and have to catch up at school.” 

The hours may have been long and the schooling stop-start but Ratray still has fond memories of his “very brotherly relationship” with Culkin, who he was already aware of prior to Home Alone.

“He was the kid from Uncle Buck at the time and I loved his work in that. He was great to work with,” Ratray says.

“We would try and crack each other up on set. He never succeeded but I absolutely got him.”

Ratray had Culkin in stitches during the scene in which Buzz intentionally eats the cheese pizza specially ordered for Kevin and then offers to “barf” it up for him – classic Buzz.

“Every time on his close-ups, I would slowly shovel pizza into my mouth. I totally got him. He was at my mercy.”

Some actors might have struggled with take after take of eating pizza – but Ratray had no qualms about enjoying the delights of Little Nero’s Pizza, happily consuming slice after slice on camera.

“I have no idea how many takes it took but I never had any difficulty. I really encouraged Chris to let me eat the pizza in the grossest way possible.  Milk it for all it was worth. I did a pretty good job.”

While Ratray remembers laughing a lot with Culkin on the set, he cites his onscreen mother and future Schitt’s Creek star Catherine O’Hara as someone he looked up to on the film.

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“She taught me so much about comedic timing and being real. There’s real acting in her performance. I studied her and learned a tremendous amount. The balance between frantic panic and true comedy. Almost screwball comedy. It’s a very fine line and she does it brilliantly. I just loved working with her.”

Ratray wouldn’t encounter the more fearsome of the film’s two Wet Bandits, Joe Pesci, until work began on the sequel. It was an encounter that wouldn’t have sounded out of place in Goodfellas.

“I let my hair grow out after Home Alone. So, initially I had this long, shoulder length hair. Joe Pesci, at the time, had a massive, almost pompadour style thick head of hair and they shaved him bald for the movie.

“He was outside the makeup trailer once as I was going in with the long hair and he said ‘What? They’re letting you keep that? They’re letting you keep your hair like that? They had to shave mine!’” 

“I had to be like ’No, Mr Pesci, I’m going in to get the buzz.’ Then he was still there when I came out with the fresh buzz cut and was like ‘look at that, they got you too! Let me see it’ and ribbed me a little for us both having to shave our heads.”

One person he does regret not interacting with on the film is John Hughes though Ratray was fortunate enough to later be cast in another of his movies, the Home Alone-esque Dennis The Menace.

“I found him to be such a warm and caring and humorous guy. Joking around, laughing with kids. Working for him was an absolute honour and seeing what a great guy he was. I wish I could have spent more time with him.”

The Home Alone movies changed Culkin’s life, catapulting him to superstardom and staggering $8 million pay checks for the movies Getting Even With Dad and Richie Rich.

Ratray might not have enjoyed the same level of stardom but he’s continued to work steadily , popping up on TV procedurals like Blue Bloods, Law & Order Special Victims Unit and Elementary as well as in meatier roles on underrated shows like Mosaic and The Tick.

Alongside that has come film roles in critically-acclaimed fare like Nebraska and Blue Ruin. It’s a CV that demonstrates he’s never ended up typecast as a result of Buzz McCallister, even if it has had its ups and downs.

Devin Ratray in Blue Ruin (2013)

“I am very privileged to have continued to act as my only profession and luckily I am able to continue to do interesting and different roles that aren’t just Buzz. But clearly Buzz is something that is going to stay with me.”

Ratray acknowledges he has occasionally been on the receiving end of people who think it is “funny to challenge Buzz McCallister” in public but has never been targeted or bullied over it. He’s also encountered fellow actors who have told him he “caught a lucky break and didn’t deserve” the role. It’s hard to know which sounds worse.

And like Culkin, Ratray struggles to watch a film millions tune in to watch every Christmas.

“I don’t watch it the same way anybody else would. I watch the film and I think about the set that we were on or something that happened at lunch during that day. It’s a dissociative experience.”

With much of the world in lockdown and many film and TV productions only now beginning to get back up and running, Ratray decided to show the film to his seven-year-old son.

“I was expecting him to be a little more impressed. He was a little disorientated to tell you the truth. He watched it and was kind of fascinated when I was on.

“I’m not quite sure he comprehended that when he was looking at the child on the screen that that was his big bearded dad. It must have been an odd experience for him.”

All these years later and despite the personal difficulties he has with it, Ratray still has a favourite scene or two from Home Alone.

“I enjoy telling the Old Man Marley story. Also, at the end when Buzz tells Kevin it’s pretty cool that he didn’t burn the place down. That was a moment that showed he wasn’t a total dick.”

Generally, though, he is hypercritical watching himself back.

“I don’t really like my performance in Home Alone. I go for obvious choices. If I did it now, I would have been funnier and meaner and better all around.”

Even with all those difficulties and the fact that, 30 years later, he’s still fielding questions about a Christmas movie he made as a teenager, Ratray has nothing but gratitude for being involved in the  movie.

“I am grateful and thankful it has become a favourite for different generations and transcended film and become bigger than a movie. People associate the holidays with it and they associate family memories with it. It’s made a deep, visceral impact on many people and also, now, their children and even grandchildren over the past 30 years. 

“It’s a tremendous phenomenon to be part of and I am very glad that I get to say I played a part.”

Buzz McCallister undoubtedly played an important part in making Home Alone the film fondly remembered today – and it may yet end up being a part he returns to in the not-too-distant future.

“I’m not at liberty to say right now but there may very well be a future engagement and return to the character. But I am not allowed to say right now.”

cnx.cmd.push(function() { cnx({ playerId: "106e33c0-3911-473c-b599-b1426db57530", }).render("0270c398a82f44f49c23c16122516796"); });

Watch this space.

The post Home Alone’s Devin Ratray on Becoming Hollywood’s Ultimate Big Brother Bully, Buzz appeared first on Den of Geek.

from Den of Geek https://ift.tt/3h7TdRW

[thedeadflag]

So I was bored last night while my parents watched NCIS over and over, so I wrote a ficlet in the vein of that Clexa one I wrote a ways back? With the party and Lexa waking up to a snuggle-happy Clarke?

Raven/Anya this time around, slightly different dynamic. Blame my boredom if it’s eh, it’s hard to feel creative when NCIS is on in the background

It was one of the things I dabbled in during my time away, hope you can get some enjoyment out of this

There were at least three major things Raven loved about summer break. The first being the obvious, that she’d have a major reprieve from worrying about exams, because damn. The second being that end-of-year parties were fantastic almost as a rule. The third was that she’d get to leave her shitty tiny dorm bed behind in favor of actual beds, even if they weren't always hers. Not that she’d ever been one to sleep in, but a good bed made for a good sleep regardless of the hours, and sometimes regardless of extenuating circumstances like hangovers.

So when she woke up Saturday morning in a very comfy bed, in comfy sheets, feeling cozy and warm, and nursing a much more forgiving hangover than she’d expected given how she’d blacked out the previous night, well, all she could do was thank god for summer break and give herself a stretch.

Or, well, she tried to, at least, her left side managing the feat just fine. It took her a moment to realize that the unusual warmth she felt was from the body latched onto her right side.

It was a little tough to say who it was, given the woman had promptly buried her face in Raven’s neck after her attempt to stretch, apparently not a fan of Raven moving around at ten after seven in the morning. However, the blonde hair narrowed it down, and a peek under the covers revealed a tattoo that left Raven both curious and confused.

Lexa’s older sister Anya showed up at a few of their group’s parties each year, and was generally decent enough but a little cool, a little thorny at times when she wasn’t around Lexa or Clarke. Not that Raven minded much, or that it did anything to quell the longstanding crush she’d had on Anya from afar for the last few years.

Of course, Anya also didn’t drink much, so it left Raven wondering why and how they ended up in a bed together. Partially dressed, sure, but still.

As tempting as it was to stay put, Raven really didn’t want to face the rejection or destruction of her fantasies, and her empty stomach was quickly making its demands known, so she began trying to carefully disentangle herself from Anya. ‘Try’ being the key word, with how tightly her bedmate held her in place.

“Mmmh...honey, stop it. Tryin’ to sleep.” Anya grumbled, nose nuzzling into the crook of Raven’s neck.

Raven had never really been one to revel in morning afters, or to put much thought into how potential partners might feel come dawn. Usually, she left long before anyone woke up, but apparently she’d met her match in Anya, the living bear trap, who insisted she stick around.

Normally, she’d be put off, considering it needy, but the gravelly rumble of Anya’s voice and the ensuing pet name had been more endearing than anything.

“Don’t you usually wake up early?” Raven asked, letting out a sharp puff of air through her nose.

“Seven. But when I drink, eight...maybe eight-thirty.” Anya answered, and maybe Raven couldn’t keep from laughing at the woman’s idea of sleeping in. Maybe Anya gave her a light jab to the ribs. “Stop it. Lemme sleep.”

“Were you this feisty last night?” Raven asked, giving another try at leaving Anya’s grasp, not really making any progress the second time around, either.

Anya huffed and slung a leg over her hips. “You don’t remember? Of course you don’t.”

The strange disappointment in Anya’s voice had Raven sinking back down onto the bed completely. “Why, what’d I do?”

“Oh, nothing special. You spilled your tequila on me, then immediately vomited on me.  Very charming, I assure you.” Raven felt a deep sinking feeling in her stomach at the thought. Usually when she drank too much, she ended up fine, but vomiting on Anya was a whole other level of fucked.

“I am so sorry, Anya.” Thankfully, her bedmate let out a hum of approval and snuggled closer.

“Which you told me repeatedly last night. I do appreciate it, though you were much sweeter last night. And you were much more intent on assuring my comfort.” Anya added, following her words with a lengthy yawn. “Kept telling me to sleep in bed with you, so you could keep me warm. So let your ‘angel’ sleep.”

That word had a few shreds of memories filling her mind. Coming down the stairs and spilling her drink on Anya. Vomiting and losing her footing, falling onto Anya. Being caught by Anya. Apologizing profusely, tearfully. Anya getting her safely into the shower, holding her hair at the toilet, helping her to bed. Raven thinking the woman was an angel for putting up with it all, for her patience, her kindness. Apparently, there was a chance that she made a habit last night of calling Anya that last night.

While she couldn’t remember it, Anya had clearly settled in with her for the night, so she must have done something right.

Raven shook her head, thinking maybe she was more charming than she already thought. “God, way to play hardball. But I guess I deserve that.”

“Mmmhm, you do. You also deserve to be my pillow for the next hour.” For all the snark, Raven was pretty sure she really did owe Anya.

But she didn’t have to play along entirely. She would be Anya’s pillow, sure. But past that, bets were off.

“Nnnnnnnnnnninety-nine bottle of beer on the wall, ninety-nine bottles of beeeer...”

The hands gripping her body suddenly shifted, fingernails pressing sharply into her body through her thin tee. “Raven, I will end you if you continue that.”

“Okay, okay. Just trying to find something to do while you sleep.” She answered, her words thankfully granting her momentary relief. Apparently annoying Anya awake was out of the question. “Foooood. Food food food. What to eat for breakfast...” She added in a slightly loud whisper a few moments afterward.

“I can still hear you.” This time, the claws didn’t come out, but Raven did feel a little lighter on oxygen from how tight Anya clutched her.

“It’s just I’m awake and I’m hungry.”

“Keep it to yourself.”

“I think better out loud.”

“And I sleep better when no one’s talking right into my ears.”

“I can’t help it, I’m hungry!”

“Deal with it.”

Raven peered at the door with great yearning as her stomach rumbled. Usually, it only took her a half hour at most after waking before she was eating something. Her poor body wasn’t used to this, especially after puking everything out the previous night. She was used to breakfast, and getting things done. It was cruel and unusual punishment, probably.

Which she could handle, sure, but she didn’t really want to. She wanted her cake and to eat it. So maybe if vinegar hadn’t worked, then honey would.

It took her a few minutes to pull that song from Back to the Future from her memory banks, long enough for her to think maybe Anya was close to falling back asleep again and securing her fate.

She could only hope her final gambit would work.

“Earth angel, earth angel...will you be mine...” Raven made sure not to be loud, but still audible, knowing Anya wouldn’t appreciate anything that would be too harsh in contrast to the silence she preferred. Certainly singing would be a distraction, but hopefully one that could convince Anya to let her wake up and maybe return with food for them both, or return to be her pillow, or whatever.

Any result where she could eat and keep Anya company would be fine in her books.

As she proceeded through the song, she felt a tiny bit more anxious, seconds turning to more than a minute without any physical or verbal response. With one last bit left, her brain was too busy thinking of another strategy to register the body moving in her arms until Anya was hovering over her, a finger pressed to Raven's lips.

The rest of the song died in her throat as she looked up in anticipation, hoping Anya would offer her one more shred of mercy.

“My darling dear...I need you to be quiet. If I promise to let you up so you can get something to eat, will you promise to come back here?” Raven nodded hastily at the offer, not wanting to hesitate and have Anya take it off the table. “Fine. But I get to sleep as long as I like, then, and not just until eight.”

Anya deflated at the assertion, feeling trapped between a rock and a hard place. “What? Come on. Please?”

“No.” Anya shook her head, staring intensely down at her. “This is how it’s going to go, since you’ve nearly sabotaged my sleep. I’m going to let you have breakfast. You’re going to be my pillow for as long as I need you, and because you owe me, you’re going to opt out of the lunch trip to Rizzo’s and stay behind with me to check on the smoked meats for dinner.”

Raven’s jaw set to the side, knowing she really did owe Anya, but she loved Rizzo’s. They had the best wings. “But that takes, like, all of fifteen minutes.”

“Buying us enough time to have lunch...” Anya started as she got up to her knees and moved up to Raven’s head. And maybe she felt a deep hunger for what laid in wait behind Anya’s panties, her musk reaching her nose from the brief distance. “...and to serve you some dessert.”

Maybe the line was tacky as hell, but Raven couldn’t laugh, not when something other than food had leapfrogged everything else to the top of her daily to-do list. Hell, she couldn’t stop staring. “Is it finger-licking good?”

The smack upside her head had Raven thinking that maybe she just should have agreed instead of pushing the envelope. “Did you seriously compare me to KFC? The fuck...”

“I totally didn’t even mean it that way.”

“Why do I even like you?”

“Okay, I’m a total catch. I’m technically a genius...”

“...and practically a mindless menace that hates sleep...”

“...I graduated undergrad from MIT at nineteen, and I don’t hate sleep!”

“You hate me getting sleep. That’s the only explanation.”

Raven let out a huff and brought her hands to Anya’s hips. “I’m sorry, angel...can I take the deal?” She peered up at Anya with her best puppy dog eyes, not wanting to fuck up a good thing. She always managed to toss out some throwaway remark that soured things between her and others she’d been interested in over the years. Missing out on Anya over an absurd one-liner would be a travesty.

The four seconds before Anya sat down on her chest felt like an eternity, and she wanted Anya to not feel as defeated as her sigh made her out to be, but Raven felt hopeful it’d work out.

“You’d owe me even more.” Anya noted shaking her head. “I’m too awake now. I won’t be able to fall asleep again.”

“We can nap in the afternoon, as long as you want, Anya. Wherever you want.” Her promise had Anya glancing over her shoulder at the doorway.  

“Even on that oversized recliner in the living room? You know Octavia would be pissed.” It was true, given Octavia always claimed that bit of furniture for herself and Lincoln. Still, it was worth the effort.

Raven brought a hand over to knit with one of Anya’s, leaving the other to gently rub at her bedmate’s hip. “Wherever you want. O can deal with it. If you want to snuggle in the big chair with me, it’s gonna happen. I’m Raven Reyes, I can do anything.”

With a sigh, Anya shuffled backward enough to pull Raven up into a seated position. “And what else?”

The challenge was an easy one, especially given her longstanding crush on the woman. “I’ll make you breakfast and handle the clean-up while you read. I’ll give you a foot massage. I’ll be very, very dedicated when lunch-time comes around.” She offered before leaning forward and pulling Anya into a kiss, thumb stroking her crush’s cheek as she channeled all of her yearning and desire into Anya, needing her to know that this wasn’t a joke to her, that this wasn’t a weekend fling if Anya didn’t want it to be. “And I will be so happy to make it all up to you, angel. With interest.”

Anya’s gaze flickered between her eyes, hot breath washing against Raven’s lips. “I like the sound of interest.” Anya dipped forward for a quick fluttering pair of kisses. “And you’re sleeping in my room tonight.”

“Wouldn’t want it any other way.” She added, running a hand through Anya’s messy blonde waves. She’d never really been one for blondes in the past, but Anya pulled off the bottle blonde look damn well.

Anya leaned up slightly, pressing her lips to Raven’s nose. “Fine. Now go make breakfast, I’m hungry.”

"Comin' right up!" Raven cheered as Anya freed her, letting her hop out of bed and jog out to the kitchen, knowing no one else would be awake for hours.

With a whole morning ahead of her, and maybe the shot at escalating things between her and Anya, Raven was only more convinced that summer break was the goddamn best thing.

[octoberwren]

Prompt: Steve x Darcy: Is it too late? (My Dear)

So I have lowkey shipped this couple for years, not because I was ashamed or anything, but because there were so much amazing fanfiction out there for them already, and I was slightly (a lot) intimidated by it. So I didn’t think I’d be able to get their voices right or do it justice. But I decided recently to broaden my horizons as some you who follow me might know already. And the wonderful human who runs @shieldshockfanfic​ gave me some prompts to run with and I decided on this one, it just hit all the right angsty notes with me. So I just wanted to say THANK YOU to @shieldshockfanfic for the heartwarming encouragement to help me be brave. Much Love to you!

Hope you enjoy the read.

You can also read it on Ao3 for your convenience.

Summary:  First there's a kidnapping. Then a bullet. And all Darcy really knows is that she despises portals.

 As far as kidnappings went Darcy's one was pretty creative, she'd have to admit, albeit grudgingly and Tony would have to finally give up the good alcohol, for her to ever reveal that little truth nugget.

 Portals weren't an unusual thing in the science labs, no matter how many times she had threatened the genius/deranged people she called her friends, that portals were a bad time waiting to happen.

 She was right. Darcy was always right, which was why it was super annoying that no one ever, ya' know, listened to her.

 But the portal that had Darcy immediately glaring at, with all of her only-one-cup-of-coffee-today fury didn't actually come from Jane or more shockingly, Tony. It came from some brightly dressed assholes in yellow hazmat suits.

 Joy.

 Of course, she threw her cup at one of the idiots head and of course when they started making grabby hands, she shoved Jane into one of the rooms made for a very specific reason; keeping The Hulk from squishing people. She slammed her hand on the red button that everyone said not to touch, and locked the furious and cussing scientist/future Queen of Asgard inside.

 She never claimed to have superb self-preservation skills, but she's sure someone would be totally proud of how she took a swing at another henchman, knocking him on his ass.

 It's her, she's the one proud of knocking him on his ass. She didn't even have the training for that move! And they said movies can't teach you things.

She's was still grinning manically, even when the blood dripped from her mouth from their retaliation on her.

 The alarms were still going mad and Jane was still cussing a blue streak when they shoved her none too gently inside the portal. Real creative, who knew A.I.M had the balls to even try that.

 And now she's currently tied to a chair in an empty room, which was more clich��d, so they're not exactly batting a thousand in her humble opinion.

 An opinion she voiced much to the displeasure of Squirrely Eyes whose scowl would make small children cry, luckily for Darcy she's witnessed Steve's Disappointed In You patented face, she's been through way worse.

 Just thinking of the man, that she has an adolescence crush from hell for, gives her the backbone to not give up. Because despite her bravado, she is absolutely fucking terrified, the hands behind her back are shaking and she can feel the tremor in her legs.

 But Steve, amazing man that he is, wouldn't back down, he'd fight, even if the whole world was telling him to back off, to move on, he wouldn't. He didn't. He stood up and he fought back with everything he had and then some.

 He helped Tony and Bucky in the best way he could, he made them a team again, it took a lot of time and so much shouting, she had to rush to her room, before she did something stupid, like cry in front of them.

 Or worse, punch them in the face.

 With Steve's pure stubbornness, they mended their relationship, the team started to fight the good fight again. The movie nights returned, and Darcy tried to help in any way she could.

 She made food for when they returned home bloody, she spoke to Bucky when late at night he'd wander the halls. She helped Tony get off his ass and talk to Pepper.

 She mostly avoided Steve, not that she didn't desperately want to talk to him, hug him, feed him hot cocoa. (Watching him beat the crap out of his punching bag was her favorite past time) But when they had first come back before she had even a chance to speak to him, Darcy had overheard Sam tease him about a kiss and then the name Sharon Carter had come up and she got her ass out of dodge.

 Afterward, she tried and spectacularly failed to notice his frown every time she sat on the opposite side of the lounge at movie night or made up some excuse when he entered the room. She was a big girl and Darcy knew that the only way this could possibly hurt this much, was a fact she wanted to bury, that she didn't have a crush on him, it was something, much, much worse.

 She didn't even hate Sharon, the woman was badass, of course Steve had gone for her, he deserved that after all he'd been through, something truly amazing.

 Darcy wasn't a hero, she wasn't a beautiful agent with scary skills.

 She was just Darcy, a woman who swore when she breathed, had sarcasm running through her veins and a scary addiction to caffeine. She was a college dropout turned lab assistant to her best friend, she'd never be good enough for a man like Steve, a war hero, a bonafide superhero and the bravest man she had ever known.

 But right now she was regretting every single step away from him, she was probably going to die by these bumblebees and he'd never know how much she-

 The crack against her cheek snapped her back into painful reality and Darcy groaned then glared when she tasted the metallic taste of blood. "What the actual fuck dude?!"

 Another slap and Darcy was getting real tired of this shit, "You weren't paying attention." He condescendingly told her, with a skeevy smile.

 "To what, your evil monologue?" Darcy took every reserve of anger she had left, which was a lot actually, and spat blood on his shiny black shoes.

 She smiled brightly at his disgust, "In case you haven't noticed, you took the wrong girl, I thought A.I.M was supposed to be the smart villains. I might be brunette, but I'm no Jane Foster."

 She gave him a ‘so there' look which he promptly ignored, the bastard.

 Squirrely Eyes leaned into her personal space and Darcy barely held in the gag at his overwhelming cologne, "And what makes you think you're not the girl we were after Darcy Lewis?"

 "First off, it's woman, thank you very much, I grew these boobs at thirteen and went through enough jackasses teasing me to deserve the title. Also, whaaaat?" she regretted mentioning the word boobs as soon as she said it, because now the only thing the creep was staring at was the girls, which, gross.

 Still talking to her boobs, The Pervert said, "There's someone very important who loves you, oh so much. A moron would be able to see it. And I'd bet he'd be willing to do anything to get you back. Like giving up a sample of his blood."

 Despite the situation, despite everything telling her, lies, lies, lies, her stupid heart was thumping with erratic speed, not in fear, but with something that felt suspiciously like hope. The traitor.

 "Thor?" She squeezed out because come on! He couldn't mean-

 Pervy Mcpervasin laughed in her face and Darcy scrunched up her nose because, hello no personal space, thy name is asshole.

 "I would have thought The Captain would have chosen a smarter woman, someone like Sharon Carter."

 She would have winced at his words, if she hadn't been too busy breaking his nose with her forehead. 

 Wow… where did that hot white anger come from? It's like she blacked out in a rage and woke up to his piggish squealing.

 He was holding his bloody nose with one hand, while she just blinked at him, "That'll teach you to respect personal space, numbnuts."

 "Ooo bish." How he slurred the words was still funny, even as he swung his hand for another strike to her face, only to be interrupted by an explosion that had the building rocking from the force.

 Her captor swung around to stare at the still closed door, Darcy let out a chuckle at his surprised action, "Oooh you're in trouble." She sing songed at his back.

 He turned to glare at her, "Ut up"

 "Seriously," Darcy continued, heedless of his garbled warning, "What kind of dumbass pokes that bear? Don't get me wrong, your plan was super-duper good, if not totally clichéd," She wasn't letting that go, it started off so well, "But… and this is a big, huge, don't-fuck-with-Captain-America kind of mistake. Your plan worked. He's here. So ya' know. Have fun with that, dead man walking."

 He was purple by the time she finished and with all that anger being directed at her, he reached out and grabbed her hair so hard her scalp burned, "I will ki-"

 The door burst in and a seething Steve, in all his Captain America glory, stepped into the room, "Let. Her. Go. Now." He clipped out of clenched teeth, the menace and screaming danger pouring off of him in waves. It would have been terrifying, if it didn't turn her on so much.

 Which was super awkward given the situation.

 "Told you so." Darcy snarked to the idiot still holding onto her head, Steve's gaze connected with her own and her breath snagged against her lungs at the intensity of his eyes.

 Maybe he did care about her? In a non platonic kind of way.

 But when he trailed those eyes over her face, (by the pain she was in, Darcy knew she looked like a bloody mess,) his blue eyes went savage in fury.

 "You have one second to take your filthy tainted hands off of her, before I tell the guy with a gun to put a bullet in you." Steve growled out taking a threatening step forward to reveal Bucky at his back and 0.1 milliseconds later, the -for once smart- man, practically tripped away with his arms up.

 "Smart move." He said before swinging his shield into an arch and knocking the portal hopping jackass unconscious and crumbling to the floor.

 Steve was at her side in a second flipping open a knife to cut the zip ties locking her in place, when her hands were free, she rubbed at the raw skin. That would take a couple days to feel not so crappy.

 She barely had a chance to get up on her own power before Steve was hauling her up and checking her face over, "Are you okay? Of course, you're not okay, stupid question. Tell me where else it hurts, does anything else hurt, Sweetheart?" He was so frantic, that thankfully he missed the blush staining her cheeks and the popping of her eyeballs.

 Sweetheart?

 Darcy looked at Bucky who was still hovering in the doorway, to check if she was as slack-jawed as she felt.

 He only made it worse my smirking and winking at her, the asshole.

 "Doll? Are you hurt anywhere else, we need to get you to medical anyway, but I want to know." She snapped her attention to Steve's stupidly handsome face and those baby blues that screamed concerned and Darcy could feel her broken heart melting.

 "What, this?" She choked out, but when he looked more anxious and on the verge of carrying her out, by just her voice, Darcy made sure her next words were light and teasing, anything to get that look off his face.

 "It was just a love tap. Dude could take some lessons from me, I knocked his buddy out with one hit." She was still proud of that damnit, and it seemed so was Steve as the first smile she had seen from him yet graced his soft lips.

 "I know," He whispered, while stroking her cheekbone with his thumb, "I saw, you have one hell of a right hook, Sweetheart."

 Her breath hitched for the second time in a matter of minutes, not just because of the pet name (seriously? Did the man forget she had a name?) but by the tender (almost adoring?) way he was looking at her.

 She opened her mouth to say, something, she had no idea, but a cough from Bucky had Steve snatching his hands away from her face. Darcy ducked her head down, her hair falling like a curtain to cut off her hurt from him.

 What did she expect really?

 "We should head back." The former assassin said, she caught Steve's terse nod as she looked up, he motioned for her to go in front of him, presumably so she'd be safe between the both of them.

 Darcy, for life of her, would never know what exactly made her turn before the super soldiers, it might have been a shift in the air, an out of place noise, a feeling maybe. The obvious point is, she did turn before them so she was the first to notice, the not so unconscious man lift a gun to Steve's back.

 Probably the second more obvious soul wrecking point, was the split second she tried to push Steve out of the way, he noticed as well and turned back to shove her behind him, so Darcy got a wall of muscle for protection and Steve...

 God Steve, no, not him, not him.  

 The first bullet ripped through his chest, the second came from Bucky as he put one square between that fuckers eyes. But Darcy didn't care about that, all she cared about was that the love of her life was falling to his knees, with blood spreading over his beloved uniform.

 "Nonononononono," Darcy hit the ground hard as she crawled over to him, but she didn't care about her pain, "Steve, come on, open those baby blues I adore. Open them, Steve. Please?"

 But he wasn't opening them, and with a trembling hand she felt his pulse and gasped out an agonized sob.

 Bucky was white noise behind her, something about Tony and medic, but Darcy was ripping off her top, scrunching it up and and and,

 Her hands were red. Blood red. Steve's blood, oh fuck this wasn't happening.

 "I tried to move on just to see you happy, you can't be happy if you're dead Steve. You're not dead. You're not. Open your fucking eyes, Steve. I need you to be happy," She was rambling, she thinks this is what people like Jane would call hysteria or was it going into shock?

 His face was pale, snow like, he was…she wouldn't be able to survive this, she knew her limits, her capabilities and this was not one of them.

 Darcy could already feel the black void of nothingness stretching open her heart and it was frightening and cold and so very lonely without him.

 His chest wasn't moving, even as she tried to pump air into lungs with her hands and breathe life into his red stained lips. This was not the kiss she always dreamt of and gave up on, this tasted like death and desolation.

 "Steve, Steve, I love you, okay, I love you. So, S-so come on, don't l-leave me, I need you, I need your smile, and your old timey speak and your optimism to brighten my day. A-and I-I don't care if you don't love me b-back. I just need you to be alive. Please, please, Steve. Please be alive." Her head was over his heart, and she heard nothing, nothing.

 Nothing but her hyperventilation. There was no air, none. Oh, God.

 "I'll stop avoiding you."She whispered into his chest and clutched the material of both their clothing, "Please come back to me."

 "Kid!" It was a disjointed voice, like something you'd hear from the bottom of deep water, she ignored it.

 Because if she stayed right here, if she kept talking, if she kept her head right here, over the heart she always wanted to keep safe, he'd wake up.

 He'd wake up.

 He had too.

 Steve was invincible, larger than life, the man with a plan.

 He had a plan right? Did anyone? Did she?

 "Please."

 "Kid you have to let go, we have to-"

 "Get the fuck off me! No, don't leave him! He has a plan! Let go!"

 "Sorry, Darcy."Such soft words and a small needle.

 "Don't leave me, Steve." a whimper, then Darcy went limp like a rag doll, "It should have been me."

   Darcy gasped in oxygen and shot upright from a deep sleep. 

 Waking up was never a joyous occasion for her, she'd beg and plead to the Gods above to shut off her alarm and bargain with her soul just to have a few more minutes.

 But this was different.

 Darcy blinked trying to figure out just what was-

 Oh.

 She really had been hysterical if Bucky had to inject something to make her go to dreamland.

 Steve.

 Steve was dead, wasn't he? It wasn't an awful nightmare if the blood under her fingernails were any kind of morbid proof enough.

 Before she knew it her hands were under the tap and her skin was raw from scrubbing, ripping off her pants, where was her other shirt? Right, she basically gave Bucky a free showing when she tore it off her body.

 An amused chuckle left her, that slowly turned into a full blown belly laugh until tears streamed down her face, just picturing his face as she basically straddled Steve in only her bra, had her in hysterical giggles.

 Or maybe it was just hysteria, because she wasn't laughing anymore, the tears were streaming down her face when she opened the shower door and put the water to just the point of boiling, over her clammy skin.

 Maybe she should go find The Winter Soldier and ask for the really good stuff, because she had a feeling she wouldn't be sleeping or stopping the bone crushing sobs anytime soon.

 She was numb and in agonizing pain all at once, Darcy had never ever felt this lost and broken before, she felt fragile, like porcelain as she slid down the tiles and hugged her knees to her chest, the water beating against her skin.

  She tried to focus on one spot and not think of him, or how he always made her coffee when she was feeling down, or once ran in the rain to save her from a bad date, how he managed to make her a little less cynical by just being him.

 She tried to forget how stupidly in love with him she was, how she knew that she'd always be in love with him.

 Even now that he was gone.

 He was gone.

 Her head fell against her kneecaps, and long after the water had gone cold, she still couldn't stop thinking about him.

 How Steve died because of her, because of her stupidity. How could she let herself get captured? He always wanted her to get some training, but Darcy blew it off, no one was coming to get her after all.

 "Oh, Darcy." the soft whimsical voice of her best friend floated to her from inside the shower.

 She was wrapped up in Jane's arms before she could blink, her whispers of, "It's okay, it's okay." the only noise besides the streaming water.

 "It's not Jane, Steve's-" She couldn't even say it, saying it made it real and Darcy was far from ready to face her new reality.

 "Hey, it's alright," Jane, sweet Jane, swept away her wet hair and tucked it behind Darcy's ear, "He's alive."

 Her words were spoken in English, but Jane might as well been talking a language from another planet, for all the good it did Darcy’s sluggish mind.

 "...What?"

 "He's alive."

 Darcy shoved up to standing and turned off the shower, while Jane stepped outside and grabbed a towel to hand to her, Darcy robotically took it with numb hands and wrapped it around her shivering body.

 She shook her head slowly, not comprehending, "No, Jane. I saw him, he didn't have a pulse."

 She would have felt that? Wouldn't she have?

 Jane shrugged, "Apparently it's a super soldier thing, his heart rate slowed, just like when he was frozen for years, it allowed Helen Cho to work her magic. She explained it to me but I'm not that kind of doctor. He's only now regained consciousness. I was checking up on him for you, seeing as you were so…out of it when you got here."

 Darcy sucked in a breath, the relief hitting her in full force that her knees almost buckled under her,  Jane quickly led her back to her bed, where she collapsed against the mattress.

 "He's alive." she breathed, testing the words in her mouth, trying to make it tangible.

 "He is, I thought maybe you'd want to go get dressed and see him?" Jane had always known about her feelings towards Steve and she had always wanted Darcy to tell him outright, she thought Steve felt the same.

 But nothing had really changed had it? He was still dating Sharon, and now Darcy had almost killed him.

 Aside from her love confession to him while he was bleeding out, everything was back to normal, except now Bucky knew, which was disturbing to think about actually.

 "Darcy?"

 "No, not today, I can't today Jane." She was liable to do something stupid, like spill her guts again.

 Her friend opened her mouth, probably to go on a rant but the look in her eyes made Jane snap it shut, and nod tightly. "Fine, you get today but tomorrow you're seeing him."

 Yep, tomorrow she’ll say thanks for saving my life man, and sorry I almost ended yours. But that could wait.

 She just needed today.

Okay, so it had already been two days, fine three. But who was counting?

 Apparently, Bucky was, because every time she ran from Steve, his best pal was waiting in the shadows, lifting up a digit on his finger to show the exact amount of days, she had been sneaking around the tower.

 Fine, avoidance was her name and avoiding was her game, it didn't help that Tony, Natasha, and Clint kept giving her the damn side eye as well. Apparently, Bucky wasn't the only one to witness her breakdown.

 And now because the team was all honesty, all the time, she was forced to deal with all of the disappointment in their faces.

 Not Coolio dudes.

 Even Tony. Tony. Mr-conceal-don't-feel himself, gave a shake of his head.

 Well fuck that noise, by the time the fourth day came around and one more soft (but not that soft Bucky!) whispered ‘idiot' and she locked herself in her room with wine and ice cream.

 The perfect break up combo. Except she hadn't broken up with him. She scoffed in derision at herself, yep, she needed this.

 The knock on her door had her slamming down her- just poured- glass of wine, and stomping to the door in agitation. She swung open the door to give Tom, Dick or Harry a verbal beat down.

 Only it was Steve, and he was mighty pissed by the dark frown plastered to his face.

 Her knee jerk reaction was to slam the door in his face, only Steve was one step ahead of her, as he gripped the side of the door so hard his knuckles turned white and she feared for the metals safety.

 "Don't." He gritted out, while pushing himself through the door and effectively making her take a couple of steps back.

 The slam of the closing door made her jump and Darcy cursed at herself, she wasn't afraid of Steve, she would never be afraid of him.

 But nervous? Yeah, she could be that, especially since that too tight t-shirt and jeans made her want to climb him like a tree.

 And he smelled so delicious that she wanted to lick and bite at the skin that tease of a shirt gave away…wait when did he get so close?

 "You said you wouldn't avoid me anymore" Steve moved closer, his lips pulled into a thin line, "You're a lot of things Darce, but I never took you for a liar."

 "Huh?" She was beyond confused, not because he knew she was avoiding him, Steve was intelligent, Darcy figured he would put two and two together, sooner or later. She just thought she would have screwed up her courage by then.

 No, she was confused because he said she told him that, which was impossible because she never said anything about…oh, shity, shit, shit.

 It was like the proverbial light switch clicked on; He heard her.

 Which also meant he heard… "Oh, fuck." She breathed out, her anxiousness racked up to about a thousand and she was backing away so fast and looking for the damn exit sign.

 "So what is it Doll?" Her heart skipped at that, and at the intense way he was tracking her with his blue eyes "You have the courage to tell me while I'm bleeding under your hands, but not when I'm standing right here in front of you?"

 "Uhm…" Darcy's back hit the wall and Steve was suddenly right in front of her, so very, very close.

 Between a rock and hard place, she had the insane urge to giggle but stopped at the blaze in his eyes.

 "You love me." There might have been a fire in his eyes, but his words were so gentle, whispered like an intimacy they only shared.

 Those three quietly spoken words were about as subtle as a bomb going off in her silent apartment, loud, deafening and the inevitable wreckage would be irreparable.

 "You're dating Sharon." Darcy gasped out as his hand landed on her shoulder, his calloused palm making her shiver.

 "I'm not." He said but when Darcy arched an-are you shitting me-eyebrow, Steve shook his head. "I'm not, it was never like that between her and I."

 "But Sam said you kissed her." Why did she sound like a whiny teenager?

 "Was that why you refused to even look me in the eye, when I came back?" When Darcy said nothing, he let out a deep sigh of frustration, "It didn't mean anything, I tried to make it mean something at first, but I knew as soon as it happened that it was a mistake. I was going through a lot and well, I'm not proud of it, but I-"

 "Wanted to have something, just in case?" Darcy asked because she honestly got it, with Peggy and then Bucky, and to top it all off, the catastrophe that ended with Tony.

 Fighting against his teammates, it was a shitty time for him and he thought he might not make it back, she couldn't blame him, she never did.

 He didn't owe her anything, they weren't together, they were friends who occasionally binge-watched shows and sat talking for hours together.

 Even though she tried to hide it, he must have seen the pain flicker on her face because he was cupping her face in his large hands, "It was something like that, but I did come home, and when everything settled, I couldn't stop thinking of a mouthy brunette."

 "Tony?" She said just to sass him, he huffed out a laugh, staring at her with something that looked a lot like adoration.

 "No, babydoll, I couldn't stop thinking about you." Darcy couldn't look away now, even if she wanted to, " and when I realized that, I spoke to Sharon and she agreed that we were better off as friends. It was better that way. So that’s when I came to the tower hoping to talk to you, but you were doing everything in your power to be in the exact opposite place that I was."

 "Steve…"

 "So I thought, ‘She must not feel the same way I do' and it tore at me Darcy, but If you wanted space, I'd give it to you. I'd give you anything you wanted or needed." Steve pushed the hair out of her eyes, and tilted her chin so she was staring right into his deep and tender gaze. 

 He gave a sad sort of smile to her, "Even if that meant what you wanted wasn't me."

 Darcy knew she had to put it all on the line now and yes, she was scared shitless but, if this brave man could trust her with all of his feelings, then she could grow some balls and tell him some home truths as well.

 "I know I'm awesome. I know that." She had to be clear on that, because she knew she was kickass but, "You just always seemed so far out of my league, another dimension really."

 Steve got that look of anger again, the one she saw just as she opened the door, "What the hell are you talking about Babydoll?"

 "Look, just listen alright?" The nicknames weren't helping either, they were very distracting, in the best kind of way.

 Steve nodded once, tightly, so she rushed to continue before he could rant, which looked like he was on the verge of doing.

 "I'm not talking about the Superhero thing, although that's some of it, I'll never be an agent or a hero. I don't think I'll ever be able to really know about The Captain's world, because I don't go out and fight like you guys do. And that's fine, I can live with that, I help in the ways that I can. I accepted that a long time ago, what I really struggle with is this," Darcy reached over to lay her hand over his beating heart.

 The very thing she thought had died days ago, and just feeling it thump against her palm was memorizing.

 "This is Steve Rogers, the man that makes Captain America who he is. This heart has always been so pure and so good, that I don't think mine will ever measure up. I swear more than I breathe, I don't like a lot of people and I get pissy when the coffee machine breaks. I'm just Darcy and because of me this wonderful heart almost stopped beating."

 The absolute quiet when she stopped talking was tense and suffocating so much so, that she wished Jane would walk in to drag her to work, just so she would be saved from herself.

 Steve's arms slammed against the wall beside her head caging her in and she let out a gasp at the several emotions mixing in his tortured eyes, "Just Darcy,? You say that like that hasn't always been perfection to me. Just Darcy, always made me feel like I wasn't alone in this world when everything else had been taken from me. Just Darcy, spoke to Bucky like a human being instead of the monster he thought he was. Just Darcy, drank with a broken Tony when he needed it at sent him after Pepper when he thought he didn't deserve it."

 "She threw Jane out of danger, made sure her best friend was safe before slugging an asshole who should never have put his hands on her, then faced a dozen armed men with a grin on her face." Steve wiped the tears that were falling from her eyes and then leant down to rest his forehead against her own,

 "You scared the living hell out of me when I found out that they had taken you, all I could think was that I was too late, I'd never see you again and that I wouldn't be able to tell you...then when I got there, you were taunting that son of a bitch, and I didn't know whether I wanted to strangle you or kiss you until you were too dazed to do anything else."

 For once in her life, Darcy was speechless, she had no witty reply or inappropriate response, she was stunned that Steve, gorgeous, wonderful Steve felt that strongly for her, she wanted to do a dance, she wanted to cry, she really wanted that kiss he brought up because it sounded…it actually sounded like…

 "Also, don't for one second blame yourself for that bullet," And there went her happy glow, her stomach plummeted and she felt nauseous just remembering that mess of a day.

 "Hey," Steve whispered trying to get her to look at him, when that didn't work he cupped her face again, which was becoming a habit of his, not that she was complaining. "I would do it again in a second. That might not be what you want to hear, but you'll always come first to me Darcy. You'll always be my top priority, so maybe it's a good thing you don't fight with us because I wouldn't be able to do my job otherwise. And yes it was touch and go there for a bit, but do you know what brought me back?"

 She had a feeling but you know what they say about assuming, so she shook her head, and prayed that the hope that was spreading through her body like liquid sun, bright and dazzling, wouldn't be crushed with his next words.

 "It was you, I heard your voice Darce, I heard you say ‘I love you' and I knew I had to fight my way back so I could tell you something as well," He leant down to kiss her jaw then her cheek, and finally her forehead.

 Only to lean back again to stare into her eyes, his lips breaking into a dazzling smile that set her heart on fire, "I love you, Just Darcy, I have for a very long time now and I'm hoping you'll say you love me too, because I'm wide awake now and I desperately want you to be my girl."

 When she stared wide eyed at him, because yes, this is exactly what she wanted but she didn't actually think it would happen, Steve for the first time that night, got a nervous look in his eyes as he searched her face.

 "Unless you're afraid of something else or?"

 She looked up at him and now that he mentioned it, "You're way too tall, and I'm super short Steve, things like that could be deal breakers." Her shit eating grin was instantly wiped off her face and she let out an embarrassed squeaking sound, when he very suddenly dropped his hands to her thighs and hauled her up against his firm body.

 Darcy wrapped her legs around his hips on reflex, her hands curling around his neck wasn't that, but it was on her bucket list, so.

 "There are ways around it." Steve growled out in his deep voice and holy shit if he didn't kiss her like right the fuck no-

 Oh that was much better.. His lips were smooth against her own, but his tongue was scorching hot as he licked his way into her mouth, and Darcy was surprised she hadn't spontaneously combusted yet, it was a kiss made for the silver screen. Or a porno. Especially when he moved his hips and she got hit with some mind blowing friction, enough to let out a wanton moan at the contact.

 Steve nipped at her lip in response to that moan and tangled his hand through Darcy’s hair, sending the best shiver racing up her spine, "Say it." He groaned against her mouth, his other hand grabbing a handful of her ass and squeezing it possessively, pushing her closer to him, like he wanted absolutely no space between them.  

 "God, you're beautiful Darcy. Made for me, Doll." Steve moved to her neck, licking a spot that made her legs tighten and instinctively thrust up against him, which made him groan and push her harder up against the wall.

 "Darcy," His voice was wrecked, a breathless growl, "say it."

 "Uhnmmg." That honestly was the best she could come up with, as his very talented mouth continued its assault on her neck and turned her brain into mush.

 But when he leant back, her whine of displeasure followed him. She blinked up at him, opening her eyes to his, only to wish she kept them closed because she was sure she was going to melt into a puddle just staring at him.

 Steve's hair was disheveled, his chest was heaving in breaths, but it was his eyes that had her almost undone. They looked almost feral, his pupils were blown wide in lust, Darcy's hand clenched his hair in response to that look, if this was only from a kiss, then how the hell would they survive the sex?

 "Darcy, I need you to say it, I need to hear it. Please." The hoarse way he asked made her finally pay attention to the question.

 Oh. Whoops. Well he couldn't blame her, she had been thinking about this moment for years,

 "Steve," She made sure she looked straight into his eyes, she carded her her hands through his hair and whispered, "I'm in love with you, I loved you when it almost killed us both, and I'll love you forever if you let me."

 "Always." He said instantaneously, kissing her nose, "So, does this mean you'll be my girl?"

 "Well, I don't know," She knew the way she said it was dripping in tease and trouble, he knew it too by the arch of his eyebrow, "You know how they say to always test drive the car before making a lifetime commitment?"

 Darcy couldn't help waggling her eyebrows, even when he snorted in amusement at her, "I wanted to take you on date first, Babydoll."

 Him nipping at her ear kind of ruined the absolute sweetness of his words, "Screw the date Steve, I want to start living our lives together, now."

 "Yeah," He said already walking to the bedroom with her in his arms, "Now sounds good Darce, real good."

 And it was good, amazing, perfect; their lives together. The sex was pretty fan-fucking-tastic as well.

That’s it my Darlings, thank you so much for reading! You have no idea how much I appreciate that ; ) Much Love.

[windmilltothestars]

I finally finished the Defenders today!  Time for some spoiler-tastic Scattered Impressions and Questions and Whatnot under the cut.

-K’un-Lun.  We know it’s gone somehow, but has it actually been massacred, or just the portal is inaccessible?  Elektra claims to have killed everyone there, but she might have just been saying that to get Danny riled enough to activate the Iron Fist.  I’d like to think it’s still out there and Danny will be able to go back at some point and talk to his old friends, possibly explain things to them, but who knows?  If he’s taking over vigilantism from Matt, New York’s his priority, and probably still THINKS there’s nothing left there because of Elektra’s claims, even if they WERE false.

-Elektra.  Augh.  I can’t get myself to like her.  I think it’s very noble and and shows great heart and loyalty for Matt to never give up trying to save her and find the good in her, but - I couldn’t see it, man.  Like in the beginning she was totally brainwashed and that was more understandable that he was trying to get her to go back to herself, but when she broke free and still wanted to murder everyone and support the Hand’s goals?  Unless there was lingering brainwashing nonsense, I just gotta say -- Matty, she’s not good for you.  Unclear if she survived, but I’m not necessarily looking forward to her return 

-Murakami was by far my favorite Hand boss.  Not even sure particularly why, just his continual snarky disregard for Alexandra, the fact that he only ever spoke his native Japanese and always tried to fight alone - it showed a kind of endearing pride and independence and arrogance that I found deeply entertaining. He was introduced dissecting a bear he had hunted and killed in hand-to-hand combat for kicks, and he lost pretty much every fight because fought alone people got the drop on him, but I loved him.  He got impaled and had a building fall on him, but with those Hand guys, you never know how much it takes for perma-death, so I can hope he’ll be back.  I felt like he showed a lot more actual personality than his lieutenant, Nobu, even if he got off worse in fights.  The rest of them I could take or leave.  I liked Sowande and Bakuto OK, nothing special, was generally annoyed/creeped out by Alexandra, and would be almost sorry to see Madame Gao go after all this time, as her enigmatic menace has been here since season one of Daredevil.  It’s likelier that she survived that collapse than Murakami, if either did.  

-I know next to nothing about Heroes for Hire or Daughters of the Dragon, but I’m here for them. I thought Luke and Danny’s friendship was gold, and Colleen and Misty were getting there.  I think it’s possible Luke and Jessica will get back together, after that last scene.  Luke and Claire seem solid, like, practically-married solid, and I wouldn’t want to rob either Luke or Claire of one thing going right for them, but - I don’t know, man.  Luke and Jessica are a happily-married superhero family with a child in the comics, I hear.  And that would be adorable.  We shall see, we shall see.  Jess deserves something going right for her, too.  I definitely want Danny to stay with Colleen, though, and not randomly get paired with Misty in the name of comics-accuracy.  She seemed so much older than him, and his dynamic with Colleen is sweet and solid.

-On the other hand, I could consider Jess with Matt, and their snarky frienship was really entertaining and refreshing.  I think ultimately I prefer them as just friends as well, but of course that’s what I used to say (and sometimes still do) about Matt and Karen.  I would definitely have to use the ship name “Mess” for them, and there dynamic was fun and sweet in that after a fashion, they stopped judging each other and worked as respectful team unit, with more affectionate banter.  But nah, I’ll hold out wild crazy out-there longshot hope that Matt gets together with Natasha Romanoff, just because.  I need to stop with my internal shipping wars because it’s going to get silly, and I’ll probably revert back to my lingering sentiment for season one Matt with Claire and Karen with Foggy, which opens up more messes with Luke and Marci and things, so -- let’s end this.

-Matt’s not dead, but his friends think he’s dead and he’s probably going to meet his mother, and season 3 is being hinted to cover the famous arc of “Born Again” - which I have not read, but intend to, and know a bit of the gist of.  I REALLY want Matt to tell his friends he’s not dead as soon as he can, because it would be a jerk move not to, but Punisher season 1 is coming out before Daredevil season 3, and Karen is in Punisher and I can’t really imagine her just getting a call from Matt all “Hey, I’m not dead” when it’s not his show and she’s dealing with other things.  So storytelling timeline-wise, it might be inevitable to postpone, which sucks. Or maybe he lets her know he’s not dead but doesn’t come back to town for a while so she won’t worry about him or mourn for him but she can do whatever she does on Punisher anyway.  Or maybe he can’t access any way to contact his friends for a long time?  Or maybe he has amnesia?  I’m grasping here, I don’t know.  I just don’t want another huge Matt’s Friends Are Justifiably Mad At Him fiasco.  I was SO HAPPY to see how NICE and SUPPORTIVE Foggy was being in Defenders.  He supports him not-Daredevilling and doesn’t judge, and then supports him doing it again when it’s inevitable and necessary, and they HUG and he just wants to HELP him.  Karen confused me and slightly annoyed me in one scene, but hopefully her talk with Trish got her thinking about Matt differently.  If she’s still an ally to Punisher I have faith she will still be one to Matt in the future.

-Stick is dead for realsies it seems.  I’m not gonna lie, I utterly loathed Stick after season 1 of Daredevil, but I was forced with great resistance to gain a measure of extremely grudging respect for him in season 2 and in Defenders.  Even if he was going to kill Danny and ultimately allowed him to be captured.  He joins a troublingly expanding list of MCU characters I initially hated but was later forced to sort-of respect -- along with Yondu, Ward Meachum, Hope Pym -- but the strength of both the dislike and the eventual respect is perhaps strongest with Stick.  Man, what a jerk.  I hate him.  I don’t hate him.  I respect him but still hate him.  I don’t know.  He’s dead.  I’m sure he’s been resigned to his death for most of his life.  Rest in peace, you child-murdering punk. 

- I freaking ADORED the lighting design of the first few episodes where every character and their scene was continually bathed in their theme color -- Red for Matt, blue/purple for Jess, yellow for Luke and green/muted turquoises for Danny. Like, it just did it for me.  I loved the lighting designs with just the symbolism of the red in season one of Daredevil, so the expansion was just beautiful.  Also the revelation that Matt can play the piano a little bit (playing a few chords of the theme tune)?  Man, I gotta do something with that in fic!

-Obviously, you know, out of the Defenders I’m the biggest fan of Daredevil.  I like all of them, but Matt is just my dude.  I’m most defensive of Danny, probably, because he is a puppy and he needs it the most, but they all shone in their respective areas, and their team dynamic was just getting good when it ended.  I wanted them to act as a team MORE, but I suppose this was more of Defenders Assemble and they’ll be more united in future seasons, if those exist.  I wanted to explore different character dynamics, though, between them all.  And the fact that they ALL knew Claire!  We got a lot of Danny and Luke and a lot of Matt and Jessica.  We got a little Jessica and Luke and very little Matt and Danny.  And we got next to no Matt and Luke or Jessica and Danny.  Anyway, they should all eat more meals together and hang out and be friends and have a “Yay we beat the Hand” party but I don’t suppose that will happen now they all think Matt’s dead.

-It was crazy, sometimes-disturbing action-packed, snarky ride, but I had a lot fun with it.  I was obsessed with it, really, and chafed at waiting for the next episode with my parents, so impatient and hungry for it I spoiled most of the major plot points for myself beforehand.  But ah well.  It was still awesome to see how it came together.  If you count how many time I mentioned season one of Daredevil here, you can probably tell I still love it the best of all the Marvel Netflix things, but Defenders was full of heart and soul and humor and worth every second.