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chahnniesroom · 7 months ago

Text

some loves

pairing: bang chan x female reader

summary: some loves are too hard to bear. years after being trainees together, chan still thinks of you all the time. he has no idea that a collaboration would lead him back to you.

word count: 6.9k

tags/warnings: reader is an independent singer/songwriter, hurt/comfort, angst, mentions of past injuries, a little bit of jealousy, i am still in denial that chan doesn't do lives anymore, hongjoong from ateez is in this fic

read it on ao3 | masterlist

a/n: once again, sorry for the long time between posts. disclaimer that i do not know much about how the music/idol industry works and i did not really do much research. also i'm not an atiny so sorry if my portrayal of hongjoong is not realistic at all. also also i did a lot of the writing on a new tablet doing handwriting with a stylus to text so please forgive any typos or weird formatting! i didn't have a chance to edit much so i may have missed some things.

Chan’s in his studio when he gets the call. At first, he doesn’t even realise his phone is ringing. It’s 2am on a weekday and he’s been working away for a few hours so the rest of the world has just about faded into the background.

He’s both surprised and intrigued when he looks at the caller ID and sees Hongjoong’s name. Chan would consider Hongjoong to be a friend, but they’re not particularly close and he can’t think of a reason that would warrant this late night call.

“Hey hyung,” Hongjoong greets him briefly before getting straight to the point. “What’s your schedule like in the next few months?”

“It’s actually not too bad,” Chan replies after a moment of thought. “We’re just finalising all the music for the next album so it’ll be a bit of time before we get busy with recording and filming for the comeback. What’s up?”

“You don’t have the answer now and I don’t want you to feel any pressure at all, but would you be interested in doing a collab together?”

“A collab?” Chan repeats. “Like, ATEEZ and Stray Kids?”

“We could,” Hongjoong says reluctantly. “But actually, if you’re up for it then I was thinking more like just you and me. I have a couple tracks that we could work off of and I’ve roped in someone to help me with recording, engineering, and production.”

“Who?” Chan asks, interest piqued.

“Not sure if you’ve heard of them, they go by the name HALLA.”

Chan recognises the name instantly. When Chan had first stumbled upon HALLA one late night scrolling and listening to different independent artists, they seemed relatively unknown. However, a little research revealed that they had KOMCA credits on a number of songs for idol groups, some of which had become widely popular. Their personal work was a variety of genres and a majority of the tracks didn’t have vocals, but the ones that did had clever or thoughtful lyrics. There were a couple of different voices featured in the original songs, both of which were smooth and melodic. HALLA has a style that Chan thinks would complement Stray Kids and he’s considered reaching out to them a few times, but was always held back by something.

There was little about HALLA posted on the internet and while Chan definitely appreciates their privacy, he’s curious to meet the person behind all the songs that he enjoyed. There’s just something familiar about all their music that he can’t quite place, something that he wants more of.

“I’m in,” Chan agrees.

“You can take some time to think about it, talk to JYPE to see what their thoughts are too.”

“No need, I’m interested and I know I can convince management to support this.”

“Well that was easy,” Hongjoong says and Chan can basically hear him grinning through the phone. “And for my own pride, I’m going to pretend that you said yes the second I suggested the collab instead of when I mentioned HALLA-ssi.” Chan instantly flushes and is glad that Hongjoong can’t see him over the phone.

“It wasn’t-” Chan begins to protest.

“It’s okay,” Hongjoong interrupts. “I’m also pretty thrilled to get to work with them, so I understand. Didn’t realise you were familiar with their work, but I guess a hidden gem like them can’t stay hidden for long. I’ll send some files over to you and we can organise a time to work.”

—

Chan finds it easy to work with Hongjoong and they make quick progress on the song, writing lyrics and creating a guide within a couple of weeks. Before he knows it, they’ve scheduled a time for Chan to visit KQ Entertainment to record vocals. Hongjoong knows that Chan is keen to be involved in the production and arrangement of the song too, so they also have a couple sessions booked for that, although Hongjoong teases him relentlessly about just wanting to work with HALLA. The worst part is that Chan can’t even deny it.

Hongjoong meets him at the entrance of KQ Entertainment and quickly takes him through security.

“HALLA-ssi is already in the studio,” Hongjoong explains as they wait for the elevator to arrive. “I was getting input on a track that’s been killing me for the past few days.”

“Did they help?” Chan asks, a little surprised that HALLA is involved in more than just this collaboration. He still hasn't had a chance to connect with them other than quick introductions through text a couple of days ago and he's just as excited to meet them as initially.

“Yeah!” Hongjoong grins, eyes curving into little crescents. “HALLA-ssi is amazing. She only had listen to it a couple times before she came up with suggestions on a few different ways to fix the part that I hated. I left her to finish cleaning the song up and then it’s basically ready for review.”

“How did you start working with HALLA-ssi? I’ve been meaning to try to connect with her.”

“It was actually a friend that suggested working with her. For someone who isn’t signed with a label- which I don’t know how nobody has signed her yet- she’s surprisingly well connected within the industry. I’m sure that KQ would be more than happy to have her work with us, but when I hinted at that, she didn’t seem interested.”

“Really?” Although KQ Entertainment is still one of the smaller companies in the industry, most unsigned artists would still jump at the chance to work there since they have a good reputation, especially due to ATEEZ’s popularity.

“I haven’t poked too much, it’s not really my business. I thought I might as well try. I just know that she’s amazing at her job and I’m grateful that I get to work with her at all.”

They turn the corner to the hallway that leads to the recording studio. The door is ajar and Hongjoong opens it, waving his arm forward to allow Chan to walk through first, before following closely behind.

HALLA’s sitting at the desk and the second Chan sees her face, he stops in his tracks.

“Y/n,” Chan breathes.

You look up, startled, and your eyes connect for a split second before Hongjoong crashes into Chan, sending them both tumbling to the ground.

“Hyung,” Hongjoong complains, unaware of Chan’s inner turmoil. “Why’d you stop?”

Chan lets out an apologetic wheeze from where he’s now trapped under Hongjoong, before resting his forehead against the ground. He needs a second to recover.

It feels like a punch to the gut to see you in front of the recording studio’s computer, fiddling with a track. You look different, but somehow it feels like Chan has been transported right back to his trainee days and all that time that the two of you had spent side by side.

It has been years since Chan last saw you. He had found out that you had left JYPE just months after Stray Kids officially debuted, but all efforts to track you down had been futile. You had changed your number and broken contact with all the other trainees. He had asked around a little bit, but everyone he talked to had been unusually cagey about the subject.

Suddenly, everything makes more sense, especially the little that he knows about HALLA.

As trainees, Chan’s favourite moments had been when you had regaled him with stories of growing up on Jeju Island. The two of you had connected early on through your shared love of the ocean. You had promised him that if he ever went to visit in his free time, you would take him on the best trails up to the Hallasan, the shield volcano, and show him incredible views from the highest point on the island. Occasionally, your parents would send you care packages and the two of you would open them hidden away in one of the vocal practice rooms, the sweet citrus of hallabong exploding in your mouths.

You had always spoken about Jeju Island so fondly, of course you would find a way to indirectly pay homage through the stage name that you chose.

“Oppa,” your voice rings out in the silence of the room. Now, Chan knows why the female voice on some of HALLA’s songs had always seemed hauntingly familiar. “Are you okay?”

“I’m fine,” both Chan and Hongjoong say at the same time, then make eye contact with identical confused expressions.

“Hongjoong-ssi, you didn’t mention that the person you wanted to feature on the track was Channie-oppa,” you say, making it clear who you were addressing your concern to earlier.

“It was supposed to be a surprise!” Hongjoong gets up slowly, dusting off his clothes and scratching at the back of his head, still looking bewildered. “I had no idea that you two knew each other, hyung mentioned he hadn’t worked with you before.”

Chan stays quiet, not sure how much you’re willing to share. Hongjoong must not know about your time with JYPE if he can’t piece together how the two of you could have met.

“Oh- I used to- We trained together back in the day,” you explain sheepishly. “I was with JYPE for a little while and all the trainees knew who Channie-oppa was. That was a long time ago though, I didn’t use the name HALLA back then.”

The five years that you trained at JYPE are more than a little while, but Chan forces himself to bite his tongue at your deliberate understatement. You don’t elaborate further and while it’s obvious that Hongjoong isn’t satisfied with your answer, he’s willing to drop the topic for now. You look relieved when he switches the subject to the song.

The three of you finish recording quickly. It shouldn’t be a surprise, the work so far with Hongjoong has been smooth so adding you to the mix has just made things easier, but Chan knows he’s a perfectionist and it often takes him an almost embarrassing number of takes before he’s satisfied. The only delay comes when Hongjoong decides he wants you to sing some of the backing vocals and resorts to actually getting on his knees and begging. Chan doesn’t go so far, but he can’t help but agree that your voice blends with the song perfectly. Of course, he also just wants to hear you sing.

You relent when Chan quietly voices his agreement and it really shouldn't make Chan feel as smug as it does.

It’s not even early enough for dinner when things are wrapped up. Chan is usually eager to finish a schedule early, but he’s reluctant to leave, taking his time packing up his belongings.

Finally, he doesn’t have a reason to stay any longer so he musters up the courage to ask.

“Do you guys want to go grab some coffee or something to eat?”

You and Hongjoong make eye contact before turning to look at Chan guiltily. His stomach churns for some reason.

“I’m sorry,” you wince. “I actually promised to help Hongjoong-ssi with an ATEEZ song and we need to go over the edits that I made before his meeting with the company later today.”

“Oh,” Chan replies, feeling a little relieved. “Right, no yeah I get it. Hongjoong actually mentioned that earlier, but I forgot. My bad.”

You offer an apologetic smile before turning to the computer, opening up a file.

“I’ll see you guys next time, then,” Chan says, starting to back out of the room.

“Of course! Thank you for your hard work and good job today!” you say brightly. Looking distracted, Hongjoong mumbles an agreement and waves goodbye. Unlike you, he’s not staring at the computer monitor though. Instead, his focus is solely on you. Even from his side profile, Chan can tell that he’s enamoured.

Honestly, Chan can’t really blame him, you look comfortable and confident, swallowed up in an oversized hoodie as you start explaining the alterations that you made to the track. Your voice is calm, but warm and you’re careful to start off by complimenting the work that Hongjoong had done previously.

Chan leaves, resolutely ignoring the twisted feeling that’s back with a vengeance and any thoughts of what the cause might be.

—

Chan can’t sleep. His thoughts are all about you, what you’ve been doing the past few years, what happened to you at JYPE that made you leave, and mostly trying to remember how and why your relationship with him slowly fell apart.

That’s the hardest part. In the darkest time of his life, when Chan had been discouraged and disheartened, you had joined JYPE with a brightness and enthusiasm that gave Chan the motivation to continue being a trainee. He had adored you. He still does.

In those last few months before the survival show had been filmed, Chan’s relationship with you had gone from being everything to nothing. It happened in the blink of an eye, and Chan had never understood what caused you to withdraw so quickly and thoroughly. The two of you had gone from spending almost all of your free time together to you avoiding him at the company, pretending not to hear when he called out your name or tried to get your attention.

The regret of letting you slip away has always eaten away at him, but now more than ever.

Of course, at the time it hadn’t felt so simple. The survival show was Chan’s first serious chance to debut, and not just that, but the weight of having eight other people’s careers depending on his leadership took a toll on all his other relationships. Your absence in his life still hurt, but Chan had lots of practice losing people. He had coped in the way that worked best in the past, throwing himself headlong into producing, training, anything to keep himself from wallowing in his feelings.

Chan doesn’t have any schedules for today, but he still heads to the company. He knows this isn’t the healthiest way to deal with things, but he doesn’t know anything else.

When he arrives, Chan just barely manages to catch a glimpse of a few familiar faces. He calls out before he can think better of it, jogging slightly to catch up. Sana, Momo, and Mina watch curiously as he approaches. He knows that Twice also aren’t in a busy period of the year, so he doesn’t feel guilty delaying them.

“Sorry to bother you all. Sana-noona, I was just wondering if we could chat?”

Sana makes brief eye contact with the rest of the girls before agreeing and waving them to go ahead of her. She follows behind Chan as he leads them into his studio, clearly interested in determining the reason behind this atypical meet up.

“What’s up, Channie?” she asks once the door is closed behind them.

Chan tries to think of the best way to start, not wanting to just outright ask, but not knowing how to subtly steer the conversation into the right direction. Finally, he abandons trying to be casual and just blurts out, “Do you remember Y/n?”

“Of course I do,” Sana says, sounding amused at the sudden mention of you. “You both had reputations for being veteran trainees. I mean, other than Jihyo.”

“I was always surprised that she never debuted,” Chan admits. “I just thought it would happen eventually and I was so shocked to find out that she had left. I didn’t- I don’t understand why she gave up on something she wanted so badly.”

“Give up?” Sana asks, sounding like she’s offended on your behalf. “Why would you say it like that?”

“What do you mean? It was like she was there one day and gone the next, I just assumed that she had enough and quit. Nobody seemed to know anything about it. I never found out why and it’s been kind of killing me.”

“You didn’t hear what happened?”

“What- something happened? To her?” Chan swallows hard, suddenly feeling unwell.

“It- I thought that you of all people would know-”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Nothing, but- you never talked to her about it? You knew her better than any of us.”

“Noona, I didn’t know that she was gone until months later. She obviously didn’t want to talk about it to me, I never reached out at first. When I finally did, her number had been changed. What was I supposed to do?”

“I- It’s better if you were to hear it from her. I don’t know the full story and you know how things can be distorted through gossip. And you especially must know how dangerous that can be.”

“What are you talking about?”

“You really have no clue? The two of you were inseparable…”

“Please,” Chan pleads.

“You know how it is in the industry, you were so close, of course there were rumours…”

It suddenly clicks.

“But we were just friends! And the dating ban-”

“Chan, you know nobody actually sticks to those, right?”

“But really, we were never-”

“I believe you,” Sana says, carefully. “But you know that to management that it doesn’t really matter whether or not anything was actually going on. To them it’s all about the optics. A perceived relationship is just as dangerous as an actual one.”

“Management…” Chan repeats, his mind racing. “They never mentioned anything to me though.”

“You never found it suspicious? You two are extremely close and out of the blue she suddenly stops talking to you, then right after the two of you stop hanging out, you’re chosen for the survival show? Someone must have talked to her at some point. Maybe not management, but for sure someone.”

“You think that’s why it took so long for me to debut?” Chan asks, even though he already knows the answer.

“It was a liability,” Sana explains. “To have a dating scandal so early on? Neither of your careers would survive. It’s painful and a terrible part of the industry but it’s true.”

“And.. Why she left, you know about that too?” Chan pleads.

“I think I’ve said too much already. I know that it’s hard, but some things are really personal.” She pauses for a moment. “What brought this on, anyway? You haven’t mentioned Y/nnie in years.”

“I can’t say much, but I- I saw her today, got to talk to her, found out what she’s been up to.” Sana gasps. Chan continues. “It was so weird to see her after so long. In the back of my mind, I had always wondered, but…”

“I’m glad that you two got to reconnect,” Sana says gently. “The two of you cared about each other a lot, that much was obvious. Talk to her, I think at the very least you’ll be able to find peace about what happened.”

“Noona-” Chan reaches out and pulls Sana into a tight hug. “Thank you for telling me. I appreciate it.”

“Of course. I’m sorry that it took so long for you to find out.”

—

A few days later, Hongjoong schedules another session to work on the song. Leading up to it, Chan is both looking forward to it and nervous, not sure what to expect. Although he still really wants to know what happened to you all those years ago, he’s scared about what he might learn and any part he might have had in it.

After a sleepless night, he ends up arriving almost 15 minutes early. This time, Hongjoong isn’t waiting at the building’s entrance. Instead he had let him know a few days before that Chan could just sign himself in and had sent him the name and location of the studio that was booked. When Chan reaches it, he can make out conversation from inside.

“HALLA,” Hongjoong can be heard through the studio doors, which aren’t fully shut. His tone is petulant and much more casual than it was previously. Chan wonders how much time the two of you have spent together between then and now and he almost misses the next thing that Hongjoong says. “You never told me that you were a trainee before.”

That stops Chan in his tracks, interested in how you’ll respond.

“It was a long time ago.” Your voice is faint. You’re still nice, but Chan can tell that your voice is stiffer than usual. “It doesn’t really matter now.”

This time, Hongjoong doesn’t let it go.

“What happened?” he prods.

“Just drop it,” you warn him. “It’s the past, forget I told you in the first place. Nothing ever came of it anyway.”

“Y/n-” Hongjoong changes tactics, the nagging tone replaced with a quieter, more serious one. You sigh.

“It didn’t work out. Obviously. I’m just not idol material.”

“Oh come on, I don’t believe that for a second. Your producing is good enough that I know for sure you’ve been getting offers to work with more companies than just KQ. When you direct during recording, you can hit every note without any warm up or practice. And I’ve heard your original songs, you must have been considered for both the position of lead rapper and lead singer as a trainee because there’s no way that anybody would let your talent go to waste.” Hongjoong is breathing hard by the end of his rant and Chan can see that this is something that has been bothering him for a while.

“It’s okay, Hongjoong-oppa.” Your voice is gentle, like you’re trying to comfort him. “I’m happy with what I have right now. Really. I’m grateful for all the freedom I have. Getting to work on any project I want and experiment with my music without having to deal with the bureaucracy and politics of the industry? Having that independence is precious to me. I wanted to be an idol for a long long time. But even though that specific plan I had didn’t work out, it doesn’t mean I’m not happy with what I’m doing.”

Hongjoong stays quiet for a while.

“Do you think that if you had the opportunity to debut as an idol now, you would?” he finally asks.

“Oppa, it’s not possible. I can’t dance, I’m too old-” you protest.

“No no, just hypothetically. Like if someone walked into the room and handed you a contract and said that if you signed it in an hour then you’d be able to debut.”

“I- I don’t know.”

“What’s your gut feeling?”

“I think I left that dream behind, I don’t know if I want to go down that path again. I don’t think I have it in me.”

“I’m sorry,” Hongjoong says after another pause. “I shouldn’t have questioned you so much, you shouldn’t have to justify your decisions to me.”

“No, it’s fine. It seems strange, right? For me to be an artist in Seoul and not want to get signed, it's only natural for you to be curious. But I learned a lot when I was a trainee and I learned even more after that and I can say with certainty that this is what I want.”

Chan takes that opportunity to knock on the studio door and push it open.

“Hey, hope I’m not interrupting,” he says, as if he wasn’t just eavesdropping on their conversation and purposely chose when to cut in. “Sorry, I’m a little bit late.”

“Hey, no problem man,” Hongjoong says. “We haven’t had a chance to do anything yet, so you’re right on time.”

“Good to see you,” you chime in. “I think this should be pretty quick so let’s get started!”

As you predicted, it doesn’t take long before a majority of the song is finished. Normally, Chan would be keen to stay involved until the very last detail is finalised, but he trusts you and at the end of this day, it’s Hongjoong’s song so he’s happy to give him the final say.

At the end of the session, Chan once again uses the opportunity to try to catch you alone. The two of you are side by side, packing your bags and Chan asks if you have any plans for the rest of the day. You confirm that you're available and Chan is about to suggest that the two of you take the time to catch up when Hongjoong interrupts.

“Oh, Y/n-ah,” he says. “I was actually hoping to get your input on something and I didn’t have a chance to ask you earlier. Can you please stick around for a bit? Sorry, hyung.”

Hongjoong sounds so sincere that Chan almost doesn’t feel annoyed that he’s stealing all of your time and attention. Almost, because at the end of the day, Chan’s only human. Even though he knows he has no right to feel possessive over you, he can’t stop the petty jealousy that bubbles up inside of him. At this point, there’s no denying the emotion.

Just like the previous session, he leaves alone, heading directly to the studio. Hours later, his breath catches when he checks his phone and sees that you’ve texted him.

[Received - 8:04pm]

Channie-oppa~

[Received - 8:04pm]

This is Y/nnie

[Received - 8:05pm]

Sorry about earlier, I have a contract with KQ Entertainment and work comes first :/

[Received - 8:09pm]

But I’m free now! You still interested in catching up?

Chan stares at the messages until it feels like they’re burned into his retinas. Logically, he knew that you had his number, the two of you were in a group chat that Hongjoong had set up, but this was your first time messaging him privately. The first time you had reached out in years. A precious opportunity that he never thought that he would have. He doesn’t want to mess this up.

He’s also shocked to see you texting so casually. Although the two of you have been comfortable in person, he wasn’t sure that it would translate to one-on-one conversation.

[Sent - 8:10pm]

Hey Y/n!

[Sent - 8:11pm]

No worries at all, I understand. I’m the same way too

[Sent - 8:13pm]

I still wanna meet up… but I’m all the way back in Gangdong-gu 😅 It’d be a bit of a trek for you if you're still at KQ

[Received - 8:13pm]

Gangdong-gu?

[Received - 8:14pm]

Ohh JYPE

[Received - 8:14pm]

My bad, forgot that you guys moved

[Sent - 8:15pm]

Yeahhh

[Sent - 8:15pm]

Headed straight back to the company after we were done, sorry

[Received - 8:18pm]

Well… If you’re willing to wait then I don’t mind. KQ is close to a metro station anyway

[Sent - 8:18pm]

Wait, really?

[Sent - 8:18pm]

No no no, don’t take the subway

[Sent - 8:18pm]

I’ll send a driver. They’re gonna pick you up in 20 min

[Received - 8:19pm]

Wowow

[Received - 8:19pm]

Private driver?

[Received - 8:20pm]

You’re a real superstar now haha

[Sent - 8:21pm]

alsfjshkafs noooooooo

[Sent - 8:21pm]

It’s just faster

[Sent - 8:21pm]

and safer

[Received - 8:22pm]

I’m not complaining

[Received - 8:22pm]

but I’m going to get your autograph when I see you

[Received - 8:23pm]

If I sell it then I can probably afford my own private driver 🤭

[Sent - 8:24pm]

Knew it

[Sent - 8:25pm]

You’re just using me for my fame

[Received - 8:26pm]

Ah you got me this time

[Received - 8:26pm]

*Your fame, your talent, and your good looks

[Received - 8:27pm]

Even tho you were the one that said you wanted to meet up

[Received - 8:27pm]

Hmmm maybe you’re the one using me?

Chan listens to his phone as it continues to vibrate from where it’s lodged in between two of the couch cushions after he threw it across to the opposite side of the room. His face is buried in his hands and flaming red. He feels both giddy and terribly embarrassed.

Chan’s no stranger to flirting, he’s experienced his fair share being on either side through interactions with the members and with Stay, but he forgot how flustered he was being on the receiving end of your teasing. The part he never understood is that your playful tone always gave way to sincerity. Even when the two of you would joke around, he could always tell that you meant every comment that you made about Chan being talented or attractive and that flattered him almost as much as it baffled him.

[Received - 8:32pm]

?? Speechless that I caught on?

[Received - 8:36pm]

I think your driver has arrived… Otherwise I’m being kidnapped

[Received - 8:40pm]

Don’t think I would survive a horror film… I got into the car with no questions asked

[Received - 8:42pm]

It was nice knowing you I guess

When he realises how much time has passed, Chan grabs his phone and runs down to the back entrance of the company. Luckily you haven’t arrived yet and he takes the time to reply to your messages.

[Sent - 8:53pm]

Sorry, lost track of time

[Sent - 8:53pm]

They’ll drop you off at the back door, I’ll meet you there so you don’t have to get signed in or anything

[Received - 8:54pm]

Don’t think you’re getting away with ignoring my other texts

[Received - 8:55pm]

But thanks

[Received - 8:55pm]

Is this back door, the famous one that only allows in authorised people?

[Received - 8:55pm]

I’m honoured

Chan rolls his eyes at your cheesy reference and is in the middle of typing up a response when he sees the car pull up. You step out cautiously, then brighten when you see where Chan’s propping up the door.

“Hey,” Chan greets you. “Glad that you made it safely.”

“Thanks for the ride,” you say, looking around curiously as Chan leads you to an elevator that takes you to the rest of the building. “So this is the new and improved JYP Entertainment. I’d say that it looks the same as before, but I never got the chance to come in.”

“Yeah,” Chan says, rubbing a hand against the back of his neck as he walks. “I mean it’s pretty nice, but at the end of the day a practice room is a practice room and that’s where we spend most of our time.”

“Hmm I think we might have to agree to disagree on that one. You have your own studio don’t you?”

“Ah, kind of. It’s technically a shared one, but practically I’m the only one that uses it unless we’re out of the country for a long time,” Chan confirms.

“Seems a lot better than what we used to have! Do you remember when we used to cram ourselves into that tiny room that barely even fit two chairs and a table?”

“I almost forgot about that, it was so terrible! In the summer it would get so hot that we’d keep the door open-”

“And then someone would come yell at us because we’d be playing music too loud-”

“I remember begging management to install a portable air conditioner on multiple occasions, but they always refused.”

“Of course! Even if they weren’t so stingy, there weren’t any windows leading outside in there, how could they install it?”

“Is that why? I always thought they just wanted us to suffer.”

“That too,” you giggle for a moment, before your smile fades. “But they weren’t totally unreasonable. Management has a different perspective than us, sometimes they know better than us because of their understanding of the industry. They can see things that we don’t.”

It’s clear that you’re no longer talking about air conditioning anymore. A lump seems to have formed in Chan’s throat when he recalls his conversation with Sana. Luckily, the two of you have just arrived and Chan forces himself to smile.

“We’re here,” he says, opening the door and motioning for you to enter ahead of him. “Welcome to Channie’s Room!”

“It’s cute!” you say as you step in. “Very… neat. It’s actually more spacious than it looks.”

“Oh,” Chan says, faltering in his steps for a second. “You- you’ve seen my studio?”

“In case you didn’t realise, you go live every week from said studio. I think at this point everyone in the K-pop industry and every K-pop fan has seen it,” you tease.

“Right, yeah. I didn’t- I wasn’t sure how much you kept up with that kind of stuff,” Chan stammers.

“K-pop or do you mean specifically Stray Kids?” you ask, tilting your head slightly.

“Either I guess," Chan shrugs.

"I will admit that it took me a while to get back into it," you say slowly. "I wasn't... in the best mindset after I left." Chan stays quiet, sensing that you're not quite finished. "I know that I disappeared and I am sorry for not reaching out. I wanted to, but I also didn't know how. I know that I hurt you. That it was cruel to avoid you, not reply to your messages, ignore your calls. I had my reasons why, but it doesn't excuse the pain that I caused, and I'm sorry for that too."

“I think,” Chan swallows hard. “I think that the most difficult part was that for the longest time, I didn’t know why. I didn’t know what I did wrong. I asked Sana about it finally, after I saw you again. And I just felt so stupid to realise that it was obvious to everyone except me."

“I’m sorry,” you say again. “I wanted to tell you, of course I wanted to. But I also knew you. If I had told you that us being together was preventing your debut-”

“I wouldn’t have cared,” Chan finishes your sentence for you, starting to understand. “I would have done anything to keep you by my side.”

"Even if it meant throwing away your career," you say softly. "I couldn't let you do that to yourself. You worked so hard, how could I live with being the reason that you were stuck in the training rooms? You belong on stage, making music.”

"The part that I still don’t get though is why you left? You should have been able to debut as well, I know it."

“Ah,” you say wistfully. You look around and grab onto the pillow that’s on the couch beside you, fidgeting with it as you figure out what to say next. “You know, I actually was supposed to debut.”

“What? How come I never heard about it?” Chan feels a pang in his chest. All these years ago, the two of you had promised that the other would be the first person that they would tell if they ever found out that they had the chance to debut. It seemed that neither of them had kept their promise.

“It was supposed to be a secret project. JYP wanted to see how successful a surprise debut announcement would be. You should have seen the NDAs that they made us sign.” You shake your head, letting out a huff of air. “It turned out to be a good decision because it meant they could cancel it without anyone knowing that we existed in the first place.”

"Who was in the group?" Chan asks.

"There were five of us. I think you know all of them, Sumin, Ryujin, Sojin, and Hyowon," you list. You're right, Chan is either familiar with or has heard of all the girls that you mention. It doesn't make sense though, the group was filled with talented individuals and Chan can't think of any reason strong enough to lead to disbandment. Even more baffling is that of the five of you, only Ryujin ended up staying at the company long enough to join the lineup for another group.

"And they just cancelled it out of nowhere?"

“No... It was- I know that for any idol, preparing for debut is tough, but I think that in some ways, it’s especially brutal for the girl groups," you say instead. Chan doesn't question you further, knowing that you must have a point that you're trying to make.

“How so?” Chan has an idea, he’s seen what the female trainees went through, the differences in how they were evaluated and criticised. But he wants to hear it from you, wants to understand what you’ve been through.

“The visual aspect feels like it’s more heavily emphasised than our talent or skills. We were measured for our music video outfits the second they finalised the concept. It was really early on, but at the time I thought it was so exciting and fun that I didn’t question it. I think that all of us were so thrilled by the thought of debuting that we didn't think anything of it. We did our final fittings for it a few weeks before filming and they had made them all a size too small, everything was just a little bit too tight. They didn’t outright say it, but it was implied that they weren’t going to alter them. It was a choice to lose weight or our chance to debut was gone. We were devastated and angry and eventually just resigned. If that's what it took then I would do it. We dieted like crazy for the time leading up to filming,” you laugh, but it's in disbelief, the sound is hollow.

Paired with what you’re saying, it makes Chan want to burn the whole world down. He doesn't say anything, not sure if he can even open his mouth without letting his rage escape, something that you don't deserve.

“We were practising, like always," you continue. "There was a tricky step that needed to be fixed by the next day when we’d be recording, a flip that we hadn't quite mastered. I was the smallest one on the team, so I was the one being flipped. It must have been like 3 or 4 in the morning, we were all tired, hungry, and nervous about filming. Honestly, I don't quite remember what happened, it was all a blur. There was just this feeling that something went wrong and then pain."

You roll up the pants on your left leg and show off the skin there. Chan has to hold back a gasp at the sight. Even though it’s long healed, the scarring is extensive and obvious. Chan can't imagine how much it must have hurt.

“I broke my ankle in two places and sprained my wrist. I couldn't believe it, five years of my life just gone in an instant. It took months before I could walk and even longer before I could dance again. Even now, I can't dance anywhere close to the way that I used to," you say with a watery smile. “Sojinnie had a concussion from the fall and Suminnie dislocated her shoulder, I must have knocked into them or fallen onto them or something. What could we do? Three out of the five of us were out of commission, there was no time and no budget for a group that hadn’t even debuted to find replacements or re-record and re-film everything. I woke up after surgery and they told me that they were sorry, but my contract with the company was over. That someone had helped me pack up all my things in the dorm. I went back to Jeju-do as soon as I was released from the hospital.”

"I- I'm sorry that I didn't know," Chan says, clearing his throat roughly when his voice breaks partway through the sentence. " I wish that I could have been there, to help or comfort you. I should have-"

"Oppa," you respond gently. "It's okay. I didn't tell anybody what happened and the company also kept things quiet. I'm glad you didn't find out at the time. You had other, more important things to focus on, I didn't want to distract you from that."

"You're not a distraction," Chan says incredulously. "You're important to me, I would have dropped everything to be with you in such a difficult time."

"And that's exactly why I couldn't tell you. You've always been too good to me, Channie-oppa," you sniffle. "Look at you now! I'm so always proud when I think of how far you've come."

Chan lifts a trembling hand and carefully cups your face, using his thumb to wipe away a tear that has started making its way down your cheek. He hears your breathing hitch, but you don't object to his touch. If anything, you melt into it.

Chan takes the opportunity to wrap his arms around you, bringing you close. The gesture breaks the dam of tears that you must have been holding back. Chan rocks the two of you back and forth gently, just letting you cry and trying to surreptitiously wipe away his own tears. It takes a few minutes before you calm, taking huge shuddering breaths that break Chan's heart almost as much as your sobs had.

"I'm sorry," you say with a voice thick with emotion.

"Hey, no," Chan reassures you. "There's no need to apologise. Are you feeling better now?"

You nod slowly, head still pressed against Chan's chest.

"I think- I think I just missed you. I always thought it would get easier, not having you in my life, but it never did."

At your words, Chan can't help his arms from tightening, squeezing you close.

"I finally found you again," he says. "And this time, I promise that I won't ever let you go."

read it on ao3 | masterlist

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jeontasy · 26 days ago

Text

Endless Summer (m)

pt.2 | Completed

word count: no idea still (im so sorry)

♡ : a little Caleb write so i can fulfill my own lil fantasies pt.2

setting: summer vacation + grandma isnt home + caleb realizes youve grown up + heavy smut + a very yearning caleb + on the couch + inappropriate use of his evol + dirty talking obv + no condom im sorry not sorry

perspective: caleb x afab reader

enjoy :)

edit: sorry for the wait!!! had to get off work before writing & i had no idea people would love the pt.1 so much im so amazed!!! i havent written anything in YEARS and its so amazing to receive so much feedback and love about my dumb 2am Caleb thirst post story. thank you all so much!!! hope u guys enjoy pt.2 as well ♡

p.s i have not written smut in so long and i most def did not proof read this pls forgive me

Part 1

gif credit: kiiseru

Your back arches slightly due to Caleb's touch, his hand is slowly moving down the side of your hips and you can feel him tremble when he feels your bare skin below that shirt. The cicadas outside were getting louder and louder as the night was going by, and even though you knew Grandma wasn't home you were still afraid of being too loud. Caleb stops and looks back at you, his eyes were clouded with desire just threatening to overflow.

"Hey.." He whispered and cups your face with his hand, his gaze manages to calm you down almost immediately, as if it was magical. Your heart starts to slow down from the nervousness. "I can stop if you want-"

"No. No don't." You hurriedly grip onto his arms before he can finish his sentence, as if afraid he's going to disappear at any moment. Caleb chuckles and lets out a sigh of relief at your reaction and nuzzles his nose into your neck, his hot breath puffing on your skin sends gentle shocks down into you. You moan quietly at the sensation and clutches onto his arms a little harder, his hard muscles serving as a support pole as your body slowly weakens at his touches.

"I've missed you everyday while you were away." Caleb breathes out, he plants a kiss on your nose and then another on your lip, "I also missed you while I was up in Skyhaven.." then another planted on your chin and down your neck. "I wanted to see you everyday.." he said as he starts kissing you even lower. His soft lips grazing lightly over the perk of your breasts as he moved downwards, forcing a whimper out of you when you feel your nipples harden against the thin tshirt. "C-Caleb.." You couldn't believe the same man who you've been longing for was also thinking of you all this time.

"I missed you so much..especially when you sent that photo of you at the beach with your friends.." Caleb moans as he kept talking and you realize he's already kissing past your stomach, even with the piece of clothing between you and his lips you still can't escape the hot breaths that he lets out. You moaned at the sudden feeling of his long fingers nearing the underside of your tshirt, slowly making their way up under and onto your burning skin. "And when you were standing so close to that guy in the photo.." He words hissing through his teeth, suddenly gripping your breasts hard underneath your shirt, "..while wearing a barely covered and pretty white bikini.." Caleb groans at the thought of the picture in his head again, remembering how much it turned him on when he saw it on his phone. He had lost count of how many times he touched himself through the night to the sight of you in that skimpy bikini.

You let out a whiny moan when you feel his thumb swipe over the hard nub on your breast and twirls it in a circle as if he was playing with a controller. Caleb smirks at your reaction and squeezes your soft breasts a couple more times before he moves down further. He can smell your wetness even though your legs were closed shut, he growls and takes his hand out from under your shirt before swirling it in the air and prying you legs open using his Evol. You let out a surprised gasp at suddenly being exposed in front of him. "Caleb!"

"What?" He says, you can see the hunger dripping from his eyes and you're suddenly choked up on words. "I can't look at my princess's pretty little pussy?" He smirks at your flushed face to what he says and he leans back down to bury himself between your legs. Your eyes follow his every move carefully and you let out a loud moan when he starts rubbing his nose against your clit through your panties. "A-ah! Caleb!" you suddenly can't control your voice and it gets even louder when he groans against your wetness, sending a deep rumble through you.

"I can make you feel so good, princess.." He whispers and you feel him push aside your panties before taking a rough lick from the bottom to the top. Your stickiness clung onto his tongue as he swallows it down, already hungry for more. Your back arches as Caleb starts licking away at your pussy, the way he was eating you out was like he hasn't had anything to eat or drink for days. His tongue laps up all your wetness before going back for your clit, swirling his wet tongue around it before giving it a gentle suck. The feeling sends waves of immense pleasure through you and you aren't able to control the moans that escape your lips, which turns Caleb on even more than he already was.

"D-don't..don't stop please...u-ugh..!" You whimper again as he buries his face deeper, his tongue probing into you while his nose nudges against your clit. "You taste so good.." you can barely hear him through the mumbling, he laps up the remaining juices and gets back up, looking directly into your eyes before pulling you in for a hungry kiss. Your tongues overlap each others in a hurry as you taste each other, you feel him reaching down to quickly untie the strings of his shorts before he suddenly stops kissing you. You let out an involuntary noise of discontent at the missing sensation of his lips, and you wrap your legs around his waist as a way to pull him in closer.

"M-more..more.." You moan softly and cups Caleb's face in for another kiss, emitting a low moan from his mouth. "I want more.." you whisper. Caleb inhales sharply and quickly drags his shorts and underwear down, exposing his cock proudly standing. You gasp when you feel the hardness graze you against your inner thigh and look into his eyes, he was already looking at you with a gentle gaze and you swear his lavender eyes were shining so brightly they looked like stars.

"Are you sure?" Caleb whispers, asking for confirmation one more time. He knew that if he did this there was no stepping back from it. He was going to crave you all the time, even more. He was going to need your touches to get through the day. He was going to need your tight pussy more and more. You breathe heavily at the question and you pull him down again for another wet kiss, giving him your answer.

Caleb positions himself hastily and pushes your soaking panties to the side again before rubbing his tip against your clit. He whimpers at the feeling, unable to control the bits of sticky pre-cum that leaks out. "I can't wait to fuck you." He whispers and slowly inserts himself into you. Both your moans echo through the empty room as he fills you up, his hard cock going deep into you until it can't anymore. He lets out a satisfied breath and holds you in his arms tightly, unwilling to move an inch.

"You have..no idea..how long I've wanted you."

You blush at his words, burying your face into his chest out of embarrassment until he suddenly jerks a hard thrust into you, making you yelp. "Don't hide from me." He whispers and holds your chin up so you can't avoid his gaze. "Let me see your face when I fuck you." You tremble at his words before he thrusts into you again, slowly finding his rhythm. You look at him with your hooded eyes as he lifts up that thin tshirt, exposing your entire body to him. He moan at the sight before grabbing a hold of your thighs and continue to thrust into you hard.

"Ungh..yes..yes..f-fuck!" You let out a string of curses as he picks up his pace, spreading your legs wider as he fucked into you. He licks his thumb before moving it down to rub your throbbing clit, sending jolts of pleasure down your body. "A-ah! Yes Caleb!" You moan out his name loudly as he continued to tease your hard clit, his wet and slippery finger drawing out quick circles on the little nub.

"Yeah? Does that feel good?" He chuckles at the way your body was curling up to the pleasure, taking in every inch of your bare body with his hungry eyes. The way your breasts bounced to every thrust was enough to drive him over the edge. "Can anyone else make you feel this good? Hmm?" He thrusts into you again and lets out a raspy moan, unable to control himself. "Fuck, you're so tight." Caleb says before pushing your legs apart further and fucks you harder. He takes both your hands and pins them above your head, hovering above you as he thrusts deeper. Every move he puts into your body sends you shifting against the rough material of the couch and the both of you are sweating so much that it makes your skin cling onto each other even more.

"I-I can't hold it.." Caleb whimpers at a loss and stares into your eyes, there was a mixture of tears, sweat and spit between the both of you and you cry out as his pace picks up even more. "Y-yes! Caleb..!"

"I can't..I'm going to cum..a-ah!" Caleb gasps at your words and he puts in one final thrust before you the both of you shatter into a quaking orgasm. You tighten hard around him as your walls tremble with your own release and you can feel his thick cum shooting up inside you with every pump.

"A-ah..it feels so good.." He whimpers at the feeling of release and he stays buried inside you for a good minute before slowly pulling out, whining at the loss of your wet warmth. He takes a few deep breaths and holds you in his arms, gently moving strands of your hair away from your blushing face, laughing at the sight of your disheveled mess.

"You know..Summer vacation doesn't end for another two months.." He whispers and plants a kiss on your sweaty forehead, "which means.." You cover his mouth with your hand before he can say anything else, your cheeks flushed with embarrassment.

“The sundae’s all melted. Make me another.” You glare at him and he laughs heartily before taking a hold of your hand and kisses your palm. His dreamy lavender eyes flashing at you.

"Anything for you my princess."

-♡- END -♡-

wahhhh thank u all for reading! :D all my love ♡

my other writings

#lads caleb #love and deepspace #love and deepspace caleb #caleb x reader #lnds caleb #caleb lads #caleb fic #love and deepspace fic #smut #lads smut #lnds smut #caleb smut #lads fanfic #love and deepspace fanfic

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tryingahandinholdingapen · 2 months ago

Text

Eventually Izuna finishes the final version of his essay, and Tobirama reads it over, approves it, and files it.

If Izuna notices that once he no longer has any reason to need his finished essay, it's suddenly filed on the bottom shelf of the accessible sex bookshelf instead of in the locked cabinet he had to ask Tobirama to open for him, he doesn't say anything.

Tobirama showers him with praise for his persistence+residence, for an excellent essay and for really furthering his understanding of a topic he clearly didn't know much about, previously. Izuna is very embarrassed. He thanks Tobirama for the compliments and for the teaching/help, and then escapes as soon as possible.

(He goes home and chases completion several times thinking of Tobirama before he can sleep)

Once the essay is done, they don't really have any reason to interact as they had before. Of course, their interactions still aren't exactly standard: Izuna continues stalking Tobirama, continues tracking him down to bother him at any and every opportunity, and keeps breaking into his lab. Meanwhile, Tobirama continues to pretend he doesn't know Izuna is following him, humours his attempts to be annoyance with alternate sniping (of various friendliness/hostility) or put-downs, continues using his lab half for questionable experiments and paperwork and half for masturbation, continues allowing Izuna to watch him masturbate. They spar, sometimes, work together when needed and bicker (again, varying hostility/friendliness when bickering)

But they don't touch outside of spars anymore, they never discuss anything even vaguely related to sex, Tobirama rarely ever seeks Izuna out first and never tries to tell him to do, or not to do, something. He doesn't praise Izuna or try to humiliate him, and Izuna no longer approaches him as someone he can ask questions or someone to whom he can confess a lack of understanding and expect help. They don't talk much, in general, outside of work. They're back to being vaguely friendly, vaguely antagonistic colleagues, with the after thought of Izuna feeling entitled to Tobirama's lab regardless of what he happens to be doing in there.

It's....less than satisfactory, to say the least.

And he can tell that Izuna isn't happy about it either, because he's breaking into Tobirama's lab far more often than he did before first being given a requisition report, he's being even more persistent in his stalking and being pointedly less careful to go unnoticed. His attempts to bother Tobirama are also gradually ramping up from the usual, persistent needling to actual attempts to pick a fight - though Tobirama shuts that down fast, and Izuna backs off entirely for free days, sulking, before going back to being a pest. He keeps trying to get Tobirama's attention, although frankly, Tobirama has no idea what the man intends to do with that attention once he has it. He's not convinced Izuna knows, either. He just feels neglected, it seems. Tobirama finds that unsatisfactory, but cannot think of a way to fix it.

Despite all this, it still feels good to have Izuna watch him. It still feels good to have the same Sharigan eyes that were such a threat in war instead transfixed on a sliver of bare skin, on the twist of his wrist, on the way blood beads at his lip when he bites down to muffle himself. Izuna can never seem to look away once Tobirama starts, if he's there, and it feels /good/.

And then one day Izuna tries another approach to get Tobirama's attention. It's tentative, and stumbles over his words a few times, clearly unsure, but one day Izuna appears when Tobirama is masturbating, pulls up a chair, and then tells him he has a question. Eyes nowhere near his face of course, Izuna is watching elsewhere at the moment.

Tobirama tells him to ask his question, and then decides he wants Izuna's eyes on his face after all. He makes a point of letting his breathing get heavier, bites his lip like he's trying to stifle himself, then lets his lip free and instead runs a hand up his chest, to his mouth - only to be quieter, of course, no other reason, he has to be quiet if he wants to hear Izuna's question and he's hardly going to /stop/ so he'll just have to muffle himself, is all - and watches with satisfaction as Izuna's face flushes almost as red as the Sharigan. Izuna's own mouth is open, having stuttered to a stop before he'd gotten out more than the first word of his question, and now his eyes are exactly where Tobirama wants them. Good.

Tobirama is very very pleased to note how long it takes Izuna to gather himself and restart his question, after that.

He's even more pleased at what Izuna has to ask.

"Ah, I just thought, um... Usually when you do an experiment, you have a hypothesis, right? And then, then you observe to see if your hypothesis is right. Or you change this variable or that variable to see what it affects, so..." Izuna got distracted watching a bead of sweat drip down Tobirama's chest, and Tobirama tried not to feel too smug about it. He failed, unsurprisingly. But he thought he might like where this line of questioning was going.

"So?" He prompted - he couldn't quite keep the breathy quality entirely out of his tone, but he /could/ keep his voice calm and even, and he loved the way it made Izuna squirm when he pretended not to be affected.

Sure enough, Izuna's blush reddened anew and he stammered a bit, gesturing emphatically and completely meaninglessly with his hands, before he could answer properly. Tobirama was careful not to acknowledge this flailing, just so he could keep watching Izuna's reaction.

Izuna cleared his throat, stared at the wall for a moment - Tobirama didn't know why he bothered, his eyes were drawn back like a magnet within seconds - and continued.

"So. In the reports it's, if you're not testing a hypothesis or the affect of a variable, you're trying to confirm previous results so...so which are you doing, now?"

Yes, he was pleased with this. If he was careful... If he was careful, he might be able to draw Izuna back in, here. At very minimum Izuna had started them back on the topic of sex, and if they both allowed that back on the table of permissable conversation that was already a vast improvement to the recent state of things.

He hasn't been thinking about this when he wrote the reports, hadn't been thinking about what Izuna might think of it at all, it was just convenient habit when writing up an observation, but now...

"Hm... Confirming previous results," Tobirama lied easily, then pressed on before Izuna could question him about previous data, "why? Do you have a hypothesis you'd like to test?"

Izuna's throat bobbed as he swallowed. Tobirama watched.

"I... yeah. Yeah, I do."

Tobirama waited, idly thrusting up into his hand as he did so, and then after a few moments in which Izuna only stared, prompted with some small impatience "Which is?"

"I, is arousal affected by another's touch in the same way other sensations are!" Izuna blurted all at once, then amended somewhat sheepishly "Like tickling. It's borderline impossible to tickle yourself because your body somehow knows it's you and so it doesn't.. count, or something. But another person can tickle you easily, and it works. Obviously it isn't nearly as hard- uh. As difficult to arouse yourself as it is to tickle yourself but is it..noticeably more difficult to do yourself, like tickling is noticeably harder to do to yourself?"

Oh.

/Oh/.

This should be far easier than he expected.

"That isn't a hypothesis." He informed Izuna matter of factly.

"It's...not?" Izuna blinked a few times, seeming disappointed.

Relax, Tobirama thought to himself in amusement, I'm not shutting your little scheme down just yet.

"It's not," he confirmed, "that is merely a vague and imprecise question. A hypothesis should be something you can prove or disprove. Try again."

Izuna relaxed a little at the familiar command, and Tobirama felt a deep flare of a sort of possessive satisfaction that he tried to ignore.

"Um." Izuna stopped, thought for a minute.

Then he tried again, offering in his best attempt at clinical, factual phrasing "If we assume that all parties involved view achieving orgasm quickly as the goal, is success achieved more quickly alone or with a partner?"

Still nowhere near satisfactory for a real hypothesis in Tobirama's opinion, but for now, for their purposes, it would do.

"Good," he praised, "now then, am I to assume that you think you should participate in this little study, as well as myself?"

Izuna nodded hard, then immediately looked embarrassed at his own eagerness.

Tobirama left hold of himself to beckon Izuna closer.

"Come here, then. You will hardly be effective in this matter from halfway across the room." He let the slightest trace of scorn touch his voice, and watched the way it made Izuna twitch and scramble to abandon his chair and join Tobirama's side.

This was good.

Tobirama might not have been able to excuse touching Izuna as his colleague or discussing what Izuna liked in bed, might not have been able to excuse undressing him or punishing his misbehaviour when he was acting as some bastardastised form of a teacher, but if he could position Izuna not as his equal researcher here, but as a subordinate... As a /subject/...

Tobirama smiled.

tobiizu au where hashirama constantly enters rooms without knocking, usually with a great deal of exuberance. so tobirama very quickly realized if he wants to masturbate, he's got to do it somewhere hashirama cannot easily waltz into. this gives his evil lab of unethical sciences a second purpose. he loves multifunctional things so that's fine, actually. tobirama's evil lab of unethical sciences and also jerking off.

post-konoha founding, izuna's main hobby is bugging tobirama as much as possible. this is extremely easy when tobirama's on a paperwork binge at the office or on a mission (since they tend to get put on missions together), but the month-long bouts of mad-sciencing tobirama sometimes does really throws a wrench in izuna's plans. so obviously he'll just have to go bother tobirama there, too!

this is how izuna ends up walking in on tobirama mid-crank.

#nsft #annnnd thats all ive got ideas for at the moment #this got way out of hand oops #sorry about that. did NOT mean to write half a fic there #in my defense. op made a really really really good post #and also again it has been just. living in my mind rent free. for way too long #also also. tobiizu are freaks smd they deserve to be. but! izuna somehow is almost always the one in charge #unfair. let tobirama be the one setting up elaborate ruses and lying and getting away with far too much shit that izuna just.... lets him #tbh i could probably write way more for this but like. i Shouldnt #otherwise it really will become a whole fic and probably also get increasingly far from the point of the original post #(sorry about that)#anyway i should probably go eat dinner and sleep now because it is (checks time) motherfucker. its nearly 2am. jesus. okay. goodnight!

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vikspretty · 6 months ago

Text

dance with me

in which neither you nor spencer can sleep, so you dance

masterlist

pairing: spencer reid x reader

tags: gn!reader (i think), they love each other (in secret), post season 2 reid but no specific season, fluff fluff fluff, confessions.

notes: my love, spencer reid. i love the idea of dancing in the refridgerator light (ts reference!) and spence seems like the kind of guy who would love to just hold his partner close and sway, kinda like how he did with maeve :(. i also really wanna run my hands through his hair while looking him in the eyes.

wc: 798

"Another show's off and runnin', Dance with me, cuz there's a storm a commin' Follow my boots, try to keep up, Dance with me, until sun up." — Kate Denson's "Dance with Me"

The knock at your door was unexpected, but from it being 2am, you knew there was only one person it would be.

You and Spencer had an unspoken tradition of turning up at each other's apartments in the middle of stormy nights. Usually there was some warning but tonight there was none.

Opening the door, you see Spencer, wet from the rain and bags under his eyes. Though you did not work with him, you were well aware of his job and how demanding it could get.

"Hey, can't sleep?" You ask, though you already knew the answer.

The only reply you got was a small, almost unnoticeable nod from Spencer. With no further thinking, you stepped to the side, opening your door wider to allow him in. You gave him a soft smile as he passed you, closing and locking the door behind him.

Without saying anything else, you started up some coffee and turned on some background music on your speakers while you waited for it. Meanwhile, Spencer had dropped his bag by your front door with his shoes and met you in your kitchen. The feeling of his arms wrapping around your waist from behind and his head burrowing in your neck was comforting.

You could tell something was troubling his mind - that was usually the reason either of you would turn up at the other's door - but rather than making him delve into it like you would know he wouldn't like, you decided to make sure he knows that you are there for him.

Without moving away from him, you turned yourself around in his arms to face him. You gave him a soft, knowing smile, meeting your hands together at the back of his neck.

In your dreams, this would be the part where you two kiss, but the fear of rejection prevented you from making it a reality, despite how much Spencer also wished to kiss you too.

Feeling a little flushed, you turned back to making the coffee before an idea came into mind.

You grabbed Spencer’s hand, who was just watching you from behind, and led him further into the middle of your kitchen.

“Dance with me?”

Spencer just nodded, hands coming to your waist again while yours met behind his neck, playing with the hair at the nape of his neck.

The quiet and darkness of the apartment along with the low volume of the music was relaxing. You made eye contact with him, smiling at him yet again.

“Do you wanna talk about it?” Your voice was soft and quiet, gently breaking the silence.

Instead of replying, he shook his head ‘no’ and looked down. You just nodded and continued to sway with him.

You wanted to say how much you wanted to be with him, opening your mouth to speak again, you closed it immediately, deciding against it.

“What is it?” Spencer asked. The question took you by surprise, not expecting him to have seen you prepare to talk. In his mind, you were going to end everything now, drained, exhausted and bored of him showing up then refusing to talk.

You took a deep breath and decided to just go with it. “Spencer, I’m so sorry, this is not what you need right now, especially with everything you’re going through, but I like you. To be honest I think I’m in love with you but I don’t want to scare you off too much,” you were rambling now, looking down at your feet, unaware of Spencer’s shocked but happy expression as you continued. “I am well aware you don’t feel the same and I don’t even understand why I’m telling you this but-”

The feeling of lips on yours shocked you. You didn't know how to act or what to do for a few seconds. When Spencer realised you weren't kissing back, he pulled back with a smirk, a complete 180 to how his face had been the entire time he had been with you tonight. "Sorry, you were putting yourself down and I couldn't take it anymore. I love you. I have loved you since the third time you let me in here at 3 in the morning. You let me in whenever I turn up with no questions then you don't push when I don't want to talk."

"I love you, Spencer."

Both with bright smiles now, you hugged closer, Spencer's hands coming up to the top of your back and his face in your neck. One of your hands ran through the hair on the back of his head while your other pulled him closer to you.

The both of you were quiet, basking in the love of each other while you continued to dance to the music in your kitchen.

so i know i said id make this one longer but it just didnt. i tried adding more but nothing would fit so here this is. i do kinda like the idea of this one but its just really short. either way, i hope you enjoyed and please send requests, the people i can write for are in my masterlist!

@cafekitsune made the dividers here!

thank you for reading!

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trippinsorrows · 2 months ago

Text

ltye: sleepless nights

authors notes: been sitting on this lil thing for about a month or two now, cause it didn't feel long enough to post tbh. it takes place while solana is away at residential treatment. after she meets fetu but before she comes home.

warnings: fluff, light angst, and some light suggestive content

words: 1.5k

masterlist

It’s stupid.

A silly fucking thing for a man who has no tolerance for things of the sort.

Ridiculous to even think, and yet he’s thinking it.

Thinking of actually doing it.

Roman sighs and turns his head to the digital clock on the nightstand.

2AM.

Of course.

The fucking witching hour. A period of time that, for him, can occur at any point during the night.

And since Solana has been away receiving treatment, an occurrence that happens damn near every night.

It’s not since she’s been gone that Roman has realized just how beneficial she is for his sleep. How much better he sleeps when he has her soft body tucked into his side and how awful it is when the space beside him is cold and vacant.

Dulce’s slightly louder than necessary breathing brings Roman to scoot over on Solana’s side of the bed to see her curled into a ball, slumbering peacefully without a care in the world. He won’t call it jealous. Just something of the sort.

Granted, Roman is also well aware of the fact that Dulce woke up several times in the middle of the night during the first week of Solana’s absence. She moved around in her bed, walked around the room, even sat and waited by the door.

Solana.

She was looking for Solana.

Solana

Her name boosts his previous horrible idea back to the surface, an idea he wishes would just go away but something that seems to nag him.

It’s inconsiderate as fuck. Just because he’s up at almost 3am in the morning doesn’t mean that she is.

Which is why he shouldn’t even be thinking about doing what he wants to do. Even as he grabs his phone. Even as lifting it from the nightstand causes the screen to light up, revealing her smiling face.

Even as he unlocks that phone and is met with another photo of her on his home screen, as he navigates his way to her contact and hits the call button. He hates it. Hates that he’s really doing this and decides that he can’t be such a selfish bastard.

Roman is seconds away from ripping the phone from his ear and smashing the red button and—

“—hello?”

Fuck.

Regrets. So many fucking regrets. “Hey.” What a stupid thing to say.

Solana makes a sound on the other end followed up with a quiet, “are you okay?”

Hearing her say more than one word help Roman clue into the fact that her voice is much softer than usual, quieter than typical, drowsy almost.

Again, fuck.

“Shit, you were sleep, weren’t you?” Of course, she fucking was. As are most people at such an ungodly hour.

He can practically hear her small smile on the other end of the phone. “It’s okay.” No, it’s not. He’s a selfish piece of shit, especially given the fact that he knows she also struggles with sleeping. “You can’t sleep, can you?”

Not at all. “Something like that,” he grumbles. “I’m sorry. Go back to sleep.”

“No.” Her objection is firmer and louder than the attributes of her previous statement. “I’m up now and—”

“Because I woke you up.”

“Talking to you is better than sleep, Roman….”

He gets quiet at that, partially disagreeing, mostly wondering if there’s something more to the statement.

“Have you been having them again?” He doesn’t need to specify what they is. She already knows.

There’s a moment of hesitation. “Something like that.” Her voice is thick and right away, it makes him wonder if she was in the midst of one when he called.

“Do you want me to come?” There’s no type of thought that comes with the offer, just an intrinsic, organic thing that only feels natural.

Again, that small, non-visible smile. “Ro, it’s almost 3 o’ clock in the morning.”

“And? Not like I’m doing anything else.” Because it’s bad enough he woke her up. The least he can do is make that worth something.

“It’s not safe for you to be on the road this time of night.”

There’s so much irony in that one sentence. An infinite amount. “Driving in the middle of the night is probably the safest thing I’ll ever do in my life, Sol.”

Truly.

Honestly.

Roman can practically picture the frown on her face. “I don’t want you doing that just for me. It’s not necessary.”

“Anything you want is necessary, Solana.” It is. Always has been. Always will be. He looks over at the side of the bed where Dulce continues to sleep peacefully. “I’ll only be gone a few hours. I’ll have one of the guards take Dulce out if she wakes up before I get back.”

Hesitation on the other end. “You….you said you don’t care about the rules….right?”

Clearly. Obviously. Especially given the fact that he’s climbing out of bed, readying to drive an hour away just to see his wife, who’s currently staying in an inpatient facility. Fuck the rules. “Not at all.”

A sigh followed by what sounds like shuffling of blankets. She’s either rolled onto her back or side. “Could you….could you do something for me then?”

An easy answer. “You know I’d do anything for you, Sol.” Anything at all. “Name it.”

Another delay that precedes a nervous request. “Can….can you bring her?”

Of all the things he expected his wife to ask, that definitely wasn't included in the list of possibilities.. “Dulce?”

Roman moves over to the dresser and pulls out some basketball shorts, as Solana explains. “I miss you, but....I miss her, too. And, I haven’t seen her in a few weeks.”

He nods, glancing at the puppy. All things considered, she’s well behaved. She only really barks when she’s hungry, needs to go outside, or sees a random gnat that she believes to be a threat.

He’s pretty confident he can bring her in without her causing a scene. Not that he really cares, either way. No one will be stupid enough to try to say anything to him. Of that, he’s sure.

“Okay.”

Solana gasps. “You’ll do it?”

“Of course.” Roman knows how attached Solana is to Dulce, and vice versa. It’d be good for both if they could see and interact with each other.

And, he gets to see his wife.

Everybody wins.

“And……bring her bed, too.”

Roman pauses at that, chuckling while sliding on his shorts and moving over to his closet to grab a hoodie. “How long you planning for us to stay?”

“What time do you have to leave?”

“Whenever you want me to.”

She’s the one chuckling this time. “I never want ya’ll to leave.”

Roman stills for a minute. Another mutual sentiment. “I know.” His eyes settle on another of his hoodies, one he recalls her wearing once, as she’s taken up a strong liking to wearing his clothes around the house.. He pulls it off the hanger to bring to her. A thing of comfort, potentially.

For when he’s not there.

“I’ll bring it,” he agrees.

“Thank you.” She sounds immensely grateful before her voice slips into something almost unsure. “It’s just….she….she’ll probably go back to sleep and since….since you’re here and….we haven’t….it’s just been…...”

Roman catches on relatively easily, hence him reminding her with all the boldness. “You want me to fuck you, don’t you, baby?”

“Roman!”

He smiles to himself, imagining how red her cheeks must be. Even with all her progress regarding their sex life, talking about it still seems to make her uneasy.

Roman chuckles, pointing out, “You didn’t answer the question.”

A quiet, whispered answers. “Yes.”

Roman makes a sound, deciding to up the ante. “Can you do me a favor then, sweet girl?”

More shifting on the other end. “Roman…..”

“Take off your underwear,” he instructs. “I want you ready for me.”

Another unexpected answer that nearly has him dropping the phone. “I’m not—I’m not wearing any.”

Fuck.

Roman has known his wife to sleep in a variety of items, starting with unnecessarily baggy clothes to normal pajamas, progressing into skimpy pajamas, and landing into mostly just one of his shirts with no bra but still underwear. So, he’s at a bit of a loss as to why she’s so underdressed.

And then she moves into a stammered, flustered explanation. “I—before I fell asleep, I was feeling…you know….”

He does know. He knows exactly what she was feeling.

Roman has to control and contain himself as he finds his grip on the phone tightening, much like the hardening growing in his boxers. “Did you think of me?”

It’s a fucking miracle this man doesn’t right come right then and there when she answers so breathlessly, “I always think of you when I touch myself.” His eyes shut and dick twitches in his boxers. “Just….just like you told me to.”

It’s a tremendous amount of will that has Roman able to resist the burning urge to walk Solana through phone sex, partially because he’s not sure if she’s ready for that. Mostly because that’s not enough for him.

He physically needs her.

Roman’s jaw tenses as he grounds out, “I’m on my way.”

Ain’t nobody getting no sleep tonight.

#roman reigns fanfiction #roman reigns fanfic #roman reigns fic #arisnotebook

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rzyraffek · 2 years ago

Note

I have a little smut request, if you don't like or don't want to write I understand that's alright.

When slashers are take a shower then S/O suddenly get in

Bo please must have him, I love this man too much, and Vincent, Lester, Brahms, Thomas, or other slashers you want to write. (or you think I pick too much you can pick some, but please Bo must thank you so much❤️)

I just think this will be fun

Oh, btw, I very love your work so perfect so wonderful so amazing❤️❤️❤️

Yall really love Sinclair's😭😭 ALSO THANK YOU V MUCH IM GLAD YALL ENJOY MY BLOG!!!! Before you read that I need to remind yall that I DONT USUALLY WRITE NSFW STUFF SO DONT EXPECT ANYTHING GREAT HERE!! Request open

Nsfw, but nothing too detailed, they/them pronouns for s/o

Shower zegz with slashers

Bo Sinclair

Our guy will make sure that they will remember that shower for long time

Yknow when you just vibe in shower and you accidently touch cold wall with your back and get all cold and upset? Yeah if s/o has the same problem.. too bad he doenst care they are getting pinned to that wall in seconds anyways

He loves seeing their face, how they react to his actions and words, how their body moves because of him

Will comment A LOT, expect a lot of praising, some cruse words and alot of growls tbh

He marks them 100% one way or another. Bite marks, Hickeys ( alot of them), ect

Afterwards he gonna bring them a towel and make sure they can go to bedroom and rest there for a while. This guy isn't the best at aftercare but he isn't heartless!

Vincent

No bcs he will blush sososo hard😨😳

Like they have to make first move cuz this guy will just stand there awkwardly looking like he has stick up his ass

He gonna be so gentle with them💖 carefully grabbing their hips/hair and enjoying the view moment

Tbh he loves grabbing their hair and vice versa, if s/o is touchy he gonna be sosos blushy

Also afterward he gonna wash their hair probably🥰 making sure they at least get out of this shower clean lol

Brahms Heelshire

Nah bcs this guy will be the one to actually pull them into shower, like s/o was just vibing doing their skincare routine and this guy just grabbed them and yeeted them into shower

He gonna act like he just wants to spent time together🙄🙄 yeah totally

Pls make sure that s/o calls him good boi or he gonna bite them

Also ngl he probably looks sexy asf with wet hair

Incredibly affectionate, yall will be extremely close to each other for the whole thing. And expect him to wisper and growl into s/o year

Thomas Hewitt

This babi will be soso confused??? Like???? Oh you wanna shower together?? Yeah sure ig I don't mind???

Again s/o has to do first move cuz he won't even think about asking them about that type of stuff! Hes a gentleman he would neverr.. unless they ask him ofc

S/o gonna forgor how to walk for few hours at least

He just gonna pick them up and pin them to wall like s/o weights nothing (tbh it doesnt really matter how much they weight this guy picked up adult men and whooped other one at the same time without any struggle, really dont worry)

He cant really tell them how he feels so he just gonna gently pat them or nuzzle them.

He will feel bad afterwards when their legs shake or when they can't really walk 😓

Micheal Myers

Tbh the only reason he showed was bcs they promised him that he will get reward later. Fr this guy stinks

Sex with him is incredibly akward. He doenst make any noise nor shows any kind of affection? Maybe he gonna carry them to bed afterwards or bring them towel?? Like this guy never heard about aftercare, or care overall tbh

He will never show it but he loves when s/o gives him affection or tells him nice words, how good he is and how great his doing his job rn

Not my proudest one! I really suck at nsfw stuff sorry😓😓 also I had nightmare and there was Bo for some reason ?? But he had heavy cowboy-texas accent ??? Idk why. Anyways its 2am yall have great rest of day

This post was made by asexual gang, like and subscribe to join asexual gang

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hamiltonaf · 1 year ago

Note

Jealous Lewis would also be great.😅 Love your writings❤️ They are so unique.

Jealousy | Lewis Hamilton

Pairing: Lewis Hamilton x Female Reader

Word Count: 1.2K

Warnings: None

A/N: Hi lovelies. This took a while to write because I had so many scenarios running through my head and finally settled on this one. Sorry if it ended abruptly, it’s literally 2am and also, sorry for the disappointing title lol.. I had a lot of fun writing this so I hope you guys enjoy - thank you anon for requesting .xx

(Y/BF/N) - Your Best Friends Name

(Y/F/N) - Your Friends Name

I couldn’t believe that the time has come for my best friend to get married. She beat me to it. I was over the moon for her at the time she FaceTimed me to share the news, fast forward to the present, it’s her bridal shower day. Of course, I, as her best friend, had to be the one to throw her a bridal shower she’ll never forget.

I felt awful when I found out that Lewis’ was arriving back on the same day as the bridal shower, though I did let him know beforehand and it wasn’t a big deal since I’d only be away for a few hours.

I got ready quite early to help some of the girls set up at (Y/BF/N)’s house. Luckily one of the other girls made it their sole duty to distract (Y/BF/N) for the day so we didn’t have to worry about that.

At perfect timing, (Y/BF/N) had a blindfold on her eyes and was lead through to the house. Once the 3 seconds were over, we gave her the go ahead to remove the blindfold which made us all erupt in screams.

The formalities followed with all of us playing games, dancing and just acting silly. That was until the real entertainment had arrived. We all heard a buzz at the door and the music was switched off. We all played along and insisted that (Y/BF/N) should answer the door since it’s her house anyway. Two police officers were at the door, “Ma’am, I believe we received a noise complaint from your fellow neighbour.”

“Oh my- I’m so sorry about that. We’ll turn the music down” (Y/BF/N) said worried. “May we come in ?” The officer asked. (Y/BF/N) stepped aside since she was so scared and worried… little did she know what was coming. “Ladies, turn it up” both officers said as I changed the song. Hats were thrown, sunglasses tossed aside, and shirts were ripped open. All the girls erupted in screams yet again and were fangirling so hard.

I stepped aside and watched the fun, as did (Y/F/N) alongside me since she felt uncomfortable, and she was also in a relationship. The rest of the girls were single, obviously except for (Y/BF/N), but they were having the time of their life. (Y/F/N) and I had a good laugh as we cheered on the girls who were enjoying it a little too much.

After all the fun was over, we took pictures with the guys, not thinking that one of us would think of posting these pictures online. We spent the rest of the night having a laugh at old memories and some of the girls were giving (Y/BF/N) advice as if they have already been married which was the biggest joke of all.

Some of the girls were drunk and so was (Y/BF/N), as much as I wanted to stay, I couldn’t abandon Lewis knowing he’s waiting for me at home. Luckily quite a number of the girls were sober, so they were staying behind to look after them for the night. I was so excited to get back home to Lewis and couldn’t wait to see him. It didn’t even cross my mind that my picture with the police officers was viral on social media since some fans follow my friends.

Once arriving home, I rushed in my heels to our front door, eager to see Lewis’ face. “Baby, I’m home !” I called for him. The only noise I could hear was the faint noise coming from the gym.

I watched him do some boxing on the punching bag. Shirtless with beads of sweat dripping down his abs. I think I was drooling. I whistled as I got closer to him, “Hey sexy. I missed you” I smiled as I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled him in for a hug. I kissed his cheek, then noticing that he didn’t hug me back. “Are you okay ?” I asked concerned. He remained silent and continued punching the bag. “Lew ? What’s wrong ?” I asked as I crossed my arms over my chest.

He shook his head at me, “Uhm care to explain as to what got you so upset ?” I raised a brow. He shut his eyes for a second and stopped punching. He huffed before answering, “You know what you did.” “Well obviously I don’t ? What the hell is going on ?” I asked as I grew angry. “How could you go out tonight and do that knowing I was coming back home today ?” He asked frustrated. “Do what ?” I asked baffled.

“How could you allow those male strippers all over you ? You’re the one that hosted the bridal shower so that only means that you called them !” He stated. “What are you even talking about ? Yeah, I called them but I’m not getting your point ?” I answered confused. “Does this ring a bell ?” He asked as he then showed me my picture taken in between the two shirtless male strippers. “This went viral. Everyone is already talking about how we broke up and here you moved on by posing with these guys” he said as he then placed his hands on his hips.

“Lew what the actual hell. Why didn’t you call me then if this was bothering you ? For your information, I didn’t even get involved when those guys came. Yeah, I called them, but the girls are all my witnesses that I stood aside with (Y/F/N) since we’re the only ones in a relationship. Those guys respected us standing aside from the fun, the only reason (Y/F/N) posted was to thank me” I was pissed off. I notice how the jealousy and anger dropped as his face softened. “Babe I’m so-“ he started. “Save it” I held my hand up to stop him as I left the room.

I guess he took a hint to leave me alone and give me some space. I was packing away my jewellery and heels in our walk-in closet when I heard the bathroom door shut. I tried to kill some time until he was done before I went to have a shower. Once I was done, I did my nightly routine and wore my satin pyjamas before leaving the bathroom.

I walked into the room to see him sat up against the headboard with his phone in hand. I then walked over to my side of the bed and grabbed my pillow - I could literally feel his burning gaze on me - I was prepared to sleep in the guest room for the night just because I’m petty. “Sweetie, where are you going ?” He asked. “To be away from you” I said as I stopped in my tracks with my back facing him before leaving the room. “Oh my days…babe” he groaned as he got up from the bed and ran to stop in front of me.

“Baby please…I’m so sorry. Please forgive me. I was just jealous, and I missed you so much. Seeing you with those guys got me upset because we haven’t been together for 2 weeks” he pouted as he engulfed me in a hug with his face nuzzled in my neck. “Lew, you should’ve known better to jump to conclusions. Besides that, who needs them when I have you” I smirked as he then looked at me with a grin. “That’s what I thought” he grinned as he then placed a hand under my chin to pull me in for a kiss. “I felt like kicking myself seeing you in that dress” he said in between kisses. “Well, you can make up for it” I smirked as he then lifted me up to wrap my legs around his torso.

#f1 #formula one #formula 1 #f1 fic #f1 imagine #f1 x reader #lewis hamilton #sir lewis hamilton #lewis hamilton imagine #lewis hamilton x reader #lewis hamilton x you #lewis hamilton fluff #lewis hamilton angst #lewis hamilton smut #lewis hamilton oneshot #f1 fluff #lh #lh44 #ricciardoaf oneshots

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atsuwiee · 1 year ago

Text

"...did you even like it?"

in which your boyfriend, ricky, wonders if you even enjoyed your day with him or did he just completely destroy it.

pairing: model!ricky x non-showbiz!gn reader genre: fluff, angst (if u squint), oneshot, self-indulgent fic :3

warnings: mentions of makeup, written in third person, slight cursing, grammatical errors, not proofread xian's note: first zb1 fic ?!?! holy moly forgive the errors as well it's currently 2am-3am in the making of this (fic under the cut!)

"check this, it'll suit you." ricky suggests as he holds a lip tint tester from the racks of the store. you sighed at him as if he wasn't already holding three shopping bags. "ricky, i still have that one lipstick you gave me, i haven't finished that yet." you say with a small smile. "that was a month ago, how 'bout a new one?" he asks gently.

"try it on, here," he gently rubs his ring finger on the product to put on your lips but then was tapped on the shoulder. ricky's motions to you abruptly stop. there were a few people behind him and you already knew what was happening. "you're ricky? shen ricky?" one of the girl asks.

well, in ricky's attempts to go unrecognized- most of the time he fails, a pair of sun glasses failing him because of his recognizable neck tattoo and flashy blonde hair color. ricky could not control the situation but only looked back and nodded. "ah! may we have a picture?" one of them said as ricky could only agree. you took a step back at a soon forming crowd, not wanting to be present or posted on the media. it was already known ricky was taken the public never knew who exactly.

in the midst of everything, ricky noticed every move you did. to when you lowered your head, letting go of his hand, stepping out of the makeup store; he noticed it all as he was smiling for cameras, deep down he was frowning knowing you had just separated yourself.

"i'm sorry but i have to get going," he says politely as he heads out and in a hurry rushes back to you who just stayed outside of the shop. "there you are" he says in relief. "sorry that happened" he says as he lowers his head. you smile at him and grab his hand again. "it's alright, i know these things happen," you say with a small chuckle. "you're very... hm... recognizable to say the least" you joked as he only tightened his grip onto your hand, walking around again at the mall.

ricky points at a display, an expensive necklace.

"y/n here," he says and scoots you over to him. "these would suit your earrings" he suggests again with a small smile. you look at the jewels in awe but his offers were now all too much. "no" was the word that only slipped out your mouth.

he looked dumbfounded. "no?!" he almost scoffs at your words as you sighed. "come on, i'm buying it for you anyways" you shake your head again. "i would love to, but oh my fucking god ricky, we've bought too much" you point out and it makes him almost frown at the thought he couldn't spoil you as much now. you chuckle at his antics and give a kiss on his cheek. "let's head to dinner now, yeah? i'm afraid staying in here longer will drive you to buy the whole mall" he chuckles at your statement but nods, taking your hand.

as you both walked, the same thing happens again, a few people coming up to him and asking for a picture or trying to get to talk to him. this wasn't new to you as he was famously known for being a model and you were almost used to it but you also wanted to keep yourself private from the public. you back away again and ricky quickly tries to wrap it up with these people to get back to you. he knew you hated crowds.

it happened during dinner again. mid-conversation with him some fan of his had tried to come closer.

"ricky-ah may i--?" "...so you were saying, dear?" ricky diverts his attention immediately back to you, driving the fan away and listening to your stories you didn't get to tell him in a while.

arriving back home, your feet were almost sore from being too hyper and checking every store but energy drained from the day. ricky helps you get ready for bed knowing how tired and drained you must've been trying to avoid the crowds that approached him.

as you tossed and turned in bed to get comfy, he only stared at the ceiling. after long silence, he taps on your shoulder.

"y/n? dear? may i ask you something?" "go ahead, dove, what is it?" you ask in between a yawn. his heart only beats rapidly when he hears the nickname dove- something he still couldn't get used to.

"...did you even like it? like, did you even like today?" he asks anxiously waiting for your answer. "did you even enjoy? and no, i don't want you to say 'of course', i want... i want you to be honest" you turn to shift positions, fully facing him as his voice softened even more and a small frown forms in the corner of his lips. "i did, ricky. i absolutely did, i missed you so much. i missed our dates- i'm being honest when i say of course i enjoyed" you say then tilted your head as he spoke again.

"it's just- god, those fans were something- i know you hate crowds and i couldn't help but- you know... think you didn't like that date because-" "because of a situation you can't control? nonsense, ricky" you completed his thoughts and it never fails to amaze him that you always know what he'd say. he nods at your words and you pull him close to you under the covers.

ricky holds you as well, taking in the scent of your hair's shampoo. "you spoil me so much and i enjoy every second with you. going out or just lounging around, nothing could ever ruin it for me" you were quick to reassure him. ricky sighs in relief kissing the crown of your head.

"get to sleep, dove, i know you rarely rest" you say and he chuckles. "says the one who sleeps at four in the morning" you pinch his nose at his statement and he playfully winces.

after that, he gazes at you, lovingly.

"i love you, so much. so damn much" ricky speaks in a hushed voice and kisses your lips softly before letting the both of you rest. "i love you more, dove" you sigh and finally rest in his arms

"i love you most-" "shut it, ricky, get to sleep. i win."

he chuckles. once again, kissing your forehead and finally resting as well. ricky in a state of peacefulness as his soul intertwines with yours for the night.

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scenetocause · 1 year ago

Text

would the drivers subscribe to lando norris' onlyfans?

max verstappen: absolutely yes. he also gifts subs. he's a supportive friend.

checo: no and he tells everyone he hasn't even though no one was asking

lewis: yes and he comments on posts with little encouraging messages

george: feels like a bad friend if he doesn't but then immediately unsubscribes the second he sees lando's dick

carlos: no. sorry to the carlandos but this is too gay for carlos.

charles: yes but he does not know how to log in again after he does it

oscar: exasperatedly explains he isn't going to, like, 12 times and eventually caves to peer pressure after a relentless day of lando telling him to. he justifies it as research to mark webber and also himself at 2am in hotel rooms.

fernando: no. it's not really for any reason, he just doesn't pay for porn.

lance: no but he does check out the previews

esteban: no and he complains about every time it's brought up in conversation

pierre: yes but it's a hate sub. honestly. just a hate sub. he's watching this out of hate.

alex: no but he sometimes checks it via lily's account

logan: yes but he just pays the sub every month and never looks out of, like, respect

yuki: yes and he is thinking about starting his own

daniel: says he does but doesn't actually (bit gay)

valtteri: absolutely yes, day one subscription, brings up fundraising ideas

zhou: no but it's like, not personal he just really can't be bothered making an account

kevin: no. what the hell are these young drivers up to these days?

hulkenberg: no because he's kind of annoyed lando's doing it not him

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theroseofmaine · 1 month ago

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None of this has any connection to what i usually post but i want to get this out so bad:

Also please forgive me for any grammar mistakes its like 2am and im tired but if i dont get this out i wont sleep

Both Damian Wayne and Terry McGinnis have very similar problems and should have very different endings.

DC saw how successful Batman Bruce Wayne is and can’t grow beyond him. Everything is Batman centric and its a bit too much. Not saying in any way shape or form that they should just throw him in the trash but they need to let the man rest at this point.

Damian is biologically the heir to both the LOA and Batman’s legacy, and he was always only had that perspective, he never really had the chance to choose for himself what he wants.

I love how he is Bruce’s bio kid and thats why he shouldn’t be Batman. He needs to choose for himself, be his own person. I really really hope they continue with the approach of him helping people by helping out in hospitals and possibly becoming a doctor instead of being a Bat, because that way hes being authentic to himself yet still following Batmans legacy (of helping Gotham and its people) but being what Bruce couldn’t: a doctor, a healer, someone that saw the path of violence and chose to leave.

The only real reason for him to become Batman? Being Bruces bio kid. That man’s whole life he was taken kids that apparently have no place in the world and even tho through the most fucked up way possible, given them a place, a reason to be good, and thats why Damian shouldnt be Batman. Because that way hes not being throw into a position he only wants because they told him thats what he should want, but finding his own place through Bruce.

Terry had not only a really interesting backstory, making parallels with the OG Batman (the loss of family, the need for justice, the love for Gotham) but also a great story: he was “just a guy” who wanted to do good but also prove to himself that he has changed and that he is good. He became Batman by himself, stealing the suit from the Batcave and choosing that thats what he wanted. And it should have stayed like that, because honestly, Batman is supposed to be just a guy that decided to take matters into his own hands bc someone should (it didn’t happen bc of his money dont even start!! absolute batman is a thing).

I feel like that by making Terry a somewhat Bruce clone in my opinion takes that away from him. Is he Batman because he has Bruce’s DNA or because he actually deserves it and made it his place? If he didn’t had Bruces DNA and still had gone through all of that, would he still be Batman? More then once Bruce told Terry to leave, and he stayed because thats what he needs, thats what Gotham needs. He should have no connection to Bruce, and because of that he should be Batman.

I love the possibility of Cassandra becoming Batman, but i really feel that Batman should start by being Batman. Before all the trauma being just a regular dude living a regular life, having deep connections with Gotham because thats where they grew up and everyone they love is in, and then after the trauma developing a strong moral compass and sense of justice.

In conclusion: make Damian a doctor or give him his own separate path in the vigilante world and make Terry just a guy again PLEASEEE really sorry this is really long and probably a bit redundant/confusing but it was a ramble i needed

#dc universe #dc comics #batman #batfam #bruce wayne #damian wayne #terry mcginnis #batman beyond #dc PLEASE make them their own person and not just Bruce centric

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multicohn · 5 months ago

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summary: taehyun likes y/n, but he kept his feelings hidden knowing how taboo it is for idols to date, but he can’t resist, especially when people think she’s dating jisung from nct dream

warnings: NOT PROOFREAD! PLEASE CORRECT ME IF YOU SEE A MISTAKE 🙏 swearing?. not really a warning, but it’s mentioned that you are born in 2002 so sorry if you’re older or younger ( like me )

pairing: fem! idol! reader x kang taehyun ( platonic! park jisung x reader mentioned )

genre: angst, fluff

author note: wrote this at like 2am but just posted cause my phone has been acting up which is why this is so rushed. i’ll probably switch to my laptop if it does this again.

ALSO! comment some ideas for a beomgyu imagine / one shot cause he’s the only from i don’t have a draft for :( ( sorry to all the beomgyu stans reading )

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

it was only normal for y/n and jisung to become close — they’re the same age and debuted only a month apart, but it was their members who pushed them into a friendship considering their shy and introverted personalities. the two slowly got over their shyness and became good friends — well, each other’s only friends.

y/n didn’t mind being surrounded by the company of her members or jisung and the other dreamies. you truly can’t trust anyone in the industry, and they were all she needed anyways.

when their company merged with hybe labels, y/n didn’t pay much attention to it. she would awkwardly meet some trainees or fellow idols when navigating her way through, but it was only short greetings before they continued on their way.

“oh, hi” y/n bowed politely as taehyun from tomorrow by together came into the elevator. it was obvious he had been sweating due to his wet hair and y/n was thankful she wore a mask and hat / beanie

“your comeback is soon, right?” they had quite a few floors to go down and y/n wasn’t sure why she started talking out of the blue — it definitely startled them both

“yeah”

“i wish you great success” taehyun smiled before the elevator dinged signally that they had arrived, she bowed and exited. once y/n heard the door shut, she smacked her palm against her forehead

“i wish you great success? what the fuck was that?” she groaned and pulled her hat / beanie down

“she hopes it’s a success” taehyun muttered happily to himself

it was no secret to his members ( and some eagle eyed fans / delusional shippers ) that taehyun is rather fond their senior. he use to have a small crush on her, but it blossomed overtime now they were under the same company. the tiktok challenges they shot gave them an opportunity to grow closer, but y/n hasn’t participated in one with him yet. it was never arranged on who would be dancing with them, but he always secretly hoped that it would be her.

unfortunately, it never was.

taehyun knew he would never have a chance; their careers speak for themselves, but sometimes he’d find himself day dreaming about what it’d be like to have a girlfriend, and instead of some random girl — it always turned out to be y/n who he would admire from behind before they turned around.

in his dream, they would be standing barefoot on top of the flowery grass hall and the would be sun shining down on her to give her an angel like glow, when she turned around, all he saw was y/n's face.

is he delusional? yeah, probably.

“there you are” huening spoke making everyone turn towards him

“didn’t think you’d stay back for so long” yeonjun commented as took a seat on the coach in the recording room

“got distracted” he shrugged

“what? looking at pics of our senior” beomgyu teased and taehyun glared at him making beomgyu pretend to be hurt

“isn’t she dating jisung from nct?”

that.

that’s another reason he wouldn’t tell her.

her and jisung were basically glued together whenever they met at events. it didn’t matter if their groups were placed far away from another, they would somehow find a way to be next to each other. fans were spilt on thinking the pair is cute and adore their friendship to being upset over how close they are and thinking they’re in a relationship.

the companies denied it, but that didn’t stop the assumptions; stolen glances when the other isn’t looking, smiling at seeing them on the big screen, singing their lines, so many instances that fans brought when they thought they were dating.

sadly, it caused a rift between y/n and jisung’s public friendship and they had to kept their interactions to a minimal. everyone saw how it affected them, they were each other’s only friend outside of their respective groups.

“she isn’t” taehyun didn’t know. no one knew except y/n and jisung — maybe their members too

huening shrugged and went to back playing on his phone while beomgyu and yeonjun gave him a knowing look.

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

y/n liked txt.

well, she didn’t have any reason not to.

they were nice and she got along with most of them, except for taehyun. they barely talked or even interacted, jisung says that he might just be shy around girls, but y/n isn’t too sure about that.

“hey, y/n. are you and jisung dating?”

“what happened to hi? hello? good morning?” she questioned her label mate who sat down with a tray of food in front of him

“just wondering” y/n narrowed her eyes at him

“why?”

“like i said — just wondering”

the whole situation is weird.

they’re acquaintances at most. sure, she has his number, but they’ve only texted each other to congratulate the other about something and nothing else.

why is he sitting in front of her and asking her if she’s dating jisung?

“no?” he nodded and continued eating, but y/n just stared. an unsettled feeling rose within her as she glazed over the cafeteria to see if ( member name ) was coming back from the bathroom or one of his members was looking for him

"oi, beomgyu" y/n let out a small sigh of relief upon seeing taehyun make his way towards him. she felt like a weight had lifted off her shoulders as she shamelessly stared into his beautiful dark brown eyes

beomgyu noticed and smirked, if taehyun wasn't going to do anything, he would.

"we have an off day tomorrow before we officially start our promotions" y/n raised an eyebrow as taehyun pulled him up harshly and whispered something she couldn't make out, but he looked angry

"am i... attracted to this?"

"taehyun would love for you to spend some time with him" taehyun froze. if they were anywhere else, he would've strangled beomgyu by now

"i-" she started but was interrupted by ( member name )

"y/n would love too!"

"why are you excited about this?" she whispered to her but was ignored

"cool, i'll text you his number" beomgyu picked up his tray and walked by while taehyun stood in shock

"sorry" he quickly spat out and bowed in embarrassment

"its okay! we are the same age, right? it wouldn't hurt..."

"beomgyu you're so fucking lucky that worked"

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

it was awkward.

the pair were in the comfort of a small studio, but were sitting quite a few centimeters apart. y/n had basically been shoved in by her members before they slammed the door shut and ran away, she should've chased after them, but didn't want to be rude and leave taehyun who lit up at seeing her.

"hi"

"hey"

the only sound that filled the small room is from taehyun's card shuffling. y/n liked card games and were often played between her and her members at their dorm, travelling somewhere, or hotel rooms. all of them each carried their own unique set just in case.

"wanna see a magic trick?" y/n tilted her head, but shrugged

she didn't really believe in magic. they were too obvious or simply dumb —

where did that coin from?

her eyes widened as taehyun pulled out a coin from out of nowhere. he wasn't even wearing a shirt with long enough sleeves to hide it; there's no way.

"ho-how did you do that?" y/n asked in confusion, amazement, a hint of fear that was small enough for taehyun not to notice

he shrugged, "magic"

that's it?

seriously?

"there's no way" she wasn't convinced, "there's got to be a trick to it all" taehyun just smiled

"i can teach you?" he offered and y/n paused, doubtful it could be easy

"really? i don't exactly have good hands or a pretty face to distract my audience" taehyun raised an eyebrow, y/n didn't seem to register what she had just said. feeling oddly confident, he leaned towards her with his hands flicking through the deck of cards

"i have a pretty face?"

"yeah"

it was so... simple. the way she said it.

"i say the same thing to jisung, it just makes him annoyed though. gotta step up my tactics, ya know?"

taehyun thought this was going somewhere, but then jisung's name slipped past her lips and he felt like he was back at square one. all the progress he was going to make? gone. vanished.

"are you okay? do you not feel well?" he met the concerned gaze that swam in your ( eye colour ) eyes, reaching a hand out to feel his cheek before moving to his forehead

"it is a bit warm, so you're probably just flushed. it happens to ( member name or yourself ) a lot"

taehyun gulped.

his normal sense of confidence dwindled a bit, but he was determined to at least tell y/n how he felt before his members actually go through with their own plan of telling her about his feelings.

he knew they would. beomgyu especially was sick of hearing how amazing she sounded in their latest comeback or how he caught a glimpse of her in the hallway and had to steady himself with the wall as to not collapse from her beauty.

y/n's members on the other hand were more ecstatic about taehyun's potential crush on her than she was. he's handsome, sings well, dances well, kind; what more could you want? they had asked. y/n wasn't experienced in crush culture, from training since she was young and having to avoid any kind of interaction with every male idol around her, she wasn't certain that thinking someone looked good was enough to consider them a crush.

their company hadn't said that they were free to date, but since they've been around for over five years, she thinks it might be okay.

"y/n"

"yeah?"

"i like you"

“okay, maybe this was a bad idea” taehyun thought as y/n just stared, wide eyed at his confession.

"what?" she asked in disbelief

"forget it" he shook his head and stood up, trying to quickly make his way past her and towards the door

but, she reached out grabbed his wrist.

"wait- taehyun!" he refused to look back, afraid of the rejection that was coming his way

"look, we-we can work something out?” she questioned

y/n didn’t mind the idea of dating taehyun, but the amount of things that could go wrong made her nervous.

“i-“ she bit her lip not wanting to admit that he’s the first and only person who’s taken an interest in her romantically, “-can we even work? our careers?”

“we work in the same building”

“you can’t trust everyone. i’ve never had a boyfriend or-or even a crush!” taehyun turned and y/n finally let go

“look. maybe you’re better off liking someone else, someone who’s actually dated before” she suggested, but taehyun was having none of it

“i don’t care, i want you”

she felt herself growing warm as he stared into her eyes. the eyes he could go on about how they twinkle beneath the lights and how he swears there are stars present — before soobin cut off him saying that it’s probably just the effect of lighting.

y/n took a deep breath and grabbed his hand lightly.

“i guess we can try” he lit up and y/n couldn’t help but smile

“jisung’s going to freak when i tell him”

she could never leave her best friend out.

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judasgot-it · 2 years ago

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Ello o/, may i request again (dk if i can tho, don't feel pressured if not maken), really love the post you made for the request my heart literally- aawkwkw, i have so many things to say to that post but really busy asfck like if i wnated to, i could literally write a essay or thesis statement, */ahem anyway

BSD boys, while having a fighting/argument with s/o they suddenly grip they're s/o's wrist too hard and ended up leaving a mark (they didn't mean to tho ;-;) that reminded the reader's past child abuse/not used to this type of conflict which lead to angst to comfort or just angst hehe. Idk this is just a random 2am thought(my time rn) I have classes later waking up at 4am too…

AHHHHHH omg yes I'm so sorry I haven't like set up any request rules yet which I should do lol, but I'm so shehejwj but I don't have limits on requests! I just try to get to them when I can <3 Also I'm so sorry about the late response! College is hard x[

But also, I wanna do some scenarios for this, so I'm gonna have to only pick a few that I feel I can write the best for this if that's ok cause ngl I feel the mercury retrograde rn,,,

Scenario: Accidentally triggering past abuse/trauma during an argument (Ranpo, Dazai)

Ranpo

Ranpo was a rather loud guy. That's not his fault, since he's only loud whenever he has a reason to be - he's confident because he knows he can get away with it. He's smart enough to survive some of the most dangerous killers, and is bold enough to laugh in their face about it too.

But god is it aggravating as hell whenever you want to truly talk to the man one on one. Sometimes, you just want to have a normal date with him - like a normal couple and do normal couple stuff.

Like right now, you just want to walk down this busy street and not have to listen to him boast about how stupid people were. It was embarrassing how loud he was about it, how the person who got hit with a car could have easily avoided it had they just checked both sides of the street.

A normal conversation to have after witnesses a horrible event, but you could feel the stares from across the street from the mans wife. Especially towards Ranpo, who seemed to have no social boundaries as everyone else in the area seemed to instead be occupied with the normal human behavior of freaking out after witnessing a man flying in the air and being hit by a car.

To save face, you dragged him away, with him still talking about it as if it were a normal everyday thing. In his world, it probably was - but not to you. Not to normal people, who didn't think about death everyday.

"Ranpo, you need to quiet down."

"What? I'm just saying. It was pretty avoidable you know?"

You turned around to glare at him, gripping your enclasped hands tightly. He thought nothing of it, swirling his ramune bottle rather casually. The ball clinked around with each step the both of you took together.

"I know that. But you do know that it's pretty insensitive to say that in front of him and the wife who saw her husband get hit with a car."

"Y/n."

You were forced back as Ranpo stopped on the sidewalk. It was apart of a narrow stretch of road, empty and away from the commotion, which forced you to look at him. He was staring at you with his eyes, as if trying to puzzle something.

"You don't actually care about them."

There was a pause. You blinked once. Then twice.

"What do you mean by that?"

He held your hand tighter, almost painfully so.

"You don't really care about them that much. So why are you defending them?"

His viridian eyes bore into yours, which deeply unsettled you. He meant nothing by it, especially with the iron grip he had on your hand which kept you in your spot.

"Because not everyone is a superfreak like you Ranpo!"

But it made you incredibly uncomfortable.

You felt the need to defend yourself, somehow.

"Some people have 'empathy' which I know is a foreign concept to people like you."

It was as he cocked his head to the side, like a crow trying to understand what you had just told him. It was as if what you just said had gone right through him, like the wind.

"You don't mean that."

He pulled you towards him. You tried to step back, but you only found yourself stepping around and trying to find your balance again.

You flinched when Ranpo reached to balance you, but you still felt the energy from your sudden bout of frustration pumping through your body. It was embarrassing, but your mind and body were reacting all on their own.

Ranpo kept staring at you, looking past your angry scowl and into something deeper.

"I'm not your enemy Y/n, I know you're upset but there's something more."

He left you feeling naked there.

"It's not that deep. You don't need to defend yourself against me."

You looked down, avoiding his eyes. The sidewalk underneath you was rather cracked and abandoned - there was a dandelion growing just underneath your feet, a rather resilient flower.

"I'm not defending myself, I'm just..."

Ranpo lifted your chin up so you could meet his eyes again, which were now softer, as they had quickly figured out the puzzle that he's struggled with.

You looked back at him. A part of you wanted to keep arguing - it was in your nature, to keep fighting. Unfortunately, it was something you've done for a long time, which Ranpo has figured out by now.

Another thing that made you feel a little uncomfortable.

He met you with a cheeky smile, like a little rat. He closed his eyes, his cheeks raising to meet his eyes.

"I know. You're a good person Y/n."

Dazai

"I just don't think you understand. I can't expect you to, but it's not your problem, so why are you so upset about it?"

Dazai was looking at you from the couch, watching as you were once again picking up bottles he had left from one of his drinking binges. He still smelled of last night, wearing the same clothes and smelling of the various drinks he had lost himself in.

"It clearly is my problem. I'm the one cleaning up your mess right now, so how could I not be involved? Dear god, do you ever look at yourself and want to even try to be better?"

Dazai looked at you, sitting up from his previous lounging position. He stared up, his elbows resting on his knees as he stared at you - his eyebags prominent in the early morning sunlight.

"What do you mean 'try' to be better? Have you ever even known what it's like to be like this?"

You rolled your eyes, dragging the bag to the front door so you could later bring it to the dumpster of your apartments. In your eyes, he was clearly being dramatic - sitting like some sort of mafioso, needing only a cigarette to seal the deal.

"Everyone has had it hard at one point Dazai. Losing yourself to alcohol every night and weekend doesn't justify it. You have a life to live you know? It's worth living."

You heard footsteps approach behind you, and looked up to see Dazai standing a little too close for comfort. His body was warm, and you could see the sweat and stains on his bandages. His hair was usually fluffy hair was greasy, but his eyes - they were dark, simply staring down at you.

"What do you know about living?"

"What?"

He had backed you into the wall, his hands now on either side of you, blocking you from exiting the danger that had become him and whatever emotional rage he had thrown himself into.

"You act like you know so much about life but you know nothing! You don't know anything about death or life - I don't think you know anything at all really. You feel all too comfortable making these assumptions about me when you don't know who I am, do you?"

He was smiling but it didn't reach his eyes at all.

You pushed at him, trying to find space to escape from his hold. His clothes and warmth made you want to burn your skin and run at that moment, and you closed your eyes in order to avoid the worst of your fears as you knew he was staring at you with those eyes that seemed to hold nothing but contempt in that very moment.

When you couldn't break free, instead feeling him pressing himself more against you, you felt your eyes begin to tear up.

"Dazai get the fuck away me."

"Or what? What will you do, oh sweet belladonna?"

You could feel tears build up in your eyes as your pushing did nothing against him - so you resorted to what you knew would work.

You raised your knee as hard as you could, and watched as Dazai fell hard on the ground, falling like a sack of potatoes. He writhed around, clutching his pearls while you gripped your pants, trying to soothe your nerves.

"Dazai I'm..."

You looked around your apartment, looking at the mess that it had become because of him. You looked back down at him, who was still on the ground and wasn't saying anything.

"Dazai I'm going to leave for a bit. Sorry."

I'm so sorry this took so long waaaaahh I'm a slow writer I'm working on it tho ;( also I was thinking about doing Jouno but I felt that it would've been super harsh so maybe I'll do him another time

#bsd x reader #bungo stray dogs x reader #bungou stray dogs x reader #ranpo x you #ranpo x reader #ranpo x y/n #dazai x reader #dazai x you #dazai x y/n #bsd x you #bsd x y/n

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