#Alright I fucking lied
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astracora · 1 day ago
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A Mandated Holiday Break - Chapter 5
Characters: Sylus x gn!mc (poly lads)
Warnings: Loose spoilers for 'Mischief' anecdote and Sylus Myth.
Word Count: 1275
Written: 21st December 2024
Notes: Post-relationship Sylus/MC-centric but poly LADs, with my personal pov of the game and lil headcanons littered in.
Chapters: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8
You've passed out, midway through some movie about a man in green visiting some city in search of his father. Sometime during your movie marathon with Sylus, he'd noticed you'd stopped caring what you'd put on. He'd gotten too invested in Die Hard (a Christmas movie, you swore), and had been more than horrified that the inaccuracies didn't bother you.
At that point you'd stopped showing him movies you really loved, instead giggling with glee at making him watch some of the worst or silliest things you could find. To see his nose scrunch, and what you'd (incorrectly) called his snobby rich boy taste.
Of all the movies you could watch, he refused to understand why toilet humour had entertained you so.
It hadn't, he thinks, his inability to not roll his eyes, had been your goal.
Still, the laughter had been worth it. He would do anything to hear it forever, so perhaps he'd let you play terrible movies for the end of time.
As you murmured in your sleep, at which he'd lowered his head to try to make words out. (Something about a farmers market, and a duck?) He'd left your side, reluctant but knowing you needed to eat. Something other than cookies. You'd at least drank the water he made sure was at your side, if he left you alone he thinks you'd subsist off caffeine.
When he untangles himself from you, carefully, so carefully because while he'd love to bring you with him, the bags under your eyes demand more sleep than you've been getting. He checks you over once more, tugging the soft pink blanket over you. (It doesn't match the decor but you'd said pink suited him. He'd given you a look of disbelief... but he hadn't stopped using it since. Despite running a higher temperature than anyone you knew.)
He met the twins in the kitchen, stuffing sugar cookies into their mouths, as soon as they heard the door open. Two pairs of guilty, wide eyes shot to stare.
He's seen raccoons before, digging through food in the bins. He won't compare them, out loud, but the look is similar. "You better hope the doctor doesn't count those." Luke gulps, Kieran fidgets.
There was little the doctor was protective over, or possessive over. Sugar, and the kitten curled up on his sofa, were the two that mattered. He'd also been informed of their presence, waiting for him.
Sylus knows no matter what, even the N109 zone wouldn't keep the good doctor away from either of those things, especially in the same room.
With a smug, little self satisfied purr, he stuffs one of the fresh baked cookies into his mouth.
Food was always better shared, than alone, as he'd learned over the years.
"Is it dinner time?" Luke asks, swinging his legs as he jumps back up on the counter. Watching Sylus grab things from around the room, pulling his phone out to find a recipe he'd been sent by the prince.
'I want to make this.'
'I'm not letting you make it in my kitchen.'
'They'll like it.'
'They won't like the base being set on fire.'
In the end he'd promised to make it instead. If only to save everyone from the prince's electronic based curse.
He nods at the question, and as he watches the two out the corner of his eye, he realises he has no idea when they started living here.
He's aware of the time they've been working for him, he remembers the day he met them vividly. He's deeply familiar with how he felt watching them struggle against Ever's bonds.
The crystals gouged out of skin, the pain, the yearning. It had twisted parts of his chest, and torn at old memories he wished he could forget.
It was never easy to separate from the past, it stayed a part of you even if you desperately wished it wouldn't.
Still, he has no recollection for when they went from visiting for work, to staying, always present unless they wanted to explore together. Talking to him with candour... no, formality was never the twin's forte.
Something had changed, however, and he wasn't sure when.
He follows steps as he muses, though doesn't share his thinking out loud, after all, they seem content to just watch. Sticking leftover crumbs in their mouths, and chattering to each other.
Sylus doesn't really know when making meals for others became like this, he started because it made you happy, he continued because he liked doing it. A simple task, but it garnered praise, and joy. Food was not something he'd needed before, now, however, it was a gift to be shared.
It was simply just as easy to prepare for four (five, as he makes enough to save a plate for the prince), as it was for two.
Kieran hums the song that you were playing earlier, still out of tune, and he has to bite back his laugh, but finds himself joining in. He doesn't remember the words yet he's never discontent for his mind to remember you in every song he ever hears.
"Hey Hunter!"
"Morning!"
You enter the room, rubbing at your eyes, and he finds himself smiling at you easily. It's more a quirk of the lips, and garnet eyes melting, but you smile back as though he's beaming.
Perhaps in his way, he is. He's still unpracticed with joy. With emotions.
Showing them is hard, so he speaks them and he places them into your hands (for your heart to keep) in actions.
He refuses to let you think he is not earnest. Never to lie, never to flatter. You will never doubt his affections, he promises.
As you yawn and pull yourself up onto the kitchen counter, and he wonders why he bothered to buy stools for the bar. None of you seem to use them, content to hover too close. Comment and talk and titter away.
When he'd asked, you'd shrugged. "I like to be tall." You'd teased, kissing his forehead at the height the counter allowed you.
His cheeks had flamed and he'd blinked. Surprised and confused. Until the feeling settled into a burning need. So hungry and desperate and clawing, he'd pulled you in by the back of your neck and bitten, kissed and licked his way up your throat.
Your laughter and sighs had stuck in his head for weeks after.
He found himself wishing you'd do it again, every single time you sat on the counter to watch him cook.
Instead of the twins singing, though you seem to find it entertaining to watch them relax, you reconnect your phone to the sound system he installed in the kitchen.
For you, ever since he visited your own place to see your speakers hooked up on the wall, humming away as you baked bread. Told him music made any task better, even the ones you hated.
Sylus has been so used to solitude his entire life. Before the abyss, after the abyss. He's spent longer alone, than he has with others. Even when he built Onychinus, ground up, clawing and scratching to his makeshift throne, nothing had touched that solitude.
His time in the clouds had been short in comparison. A blip.
A torn out moment as close to bliss as he could ever have thought to get.
This. Here. A low chuckle in his throat, songs in the air, and warmth in his joined heart... he could not bear to trade or lose.
Even when one of the twins, pointing at each other when whirled on, throws a slice of carrot at his head.
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animentality · 1 month ago
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the trumpers are out here insisting that trump won because those uppity city liberals are so arrogant and snooty looking down on them with their superiority complexes, and they lost the election because they refused to pander emotionally to the beer guzzlers and gun toting rednecks of this proud nation, well.
I'm just gonna say something even white trash can understand...
with all due respect... fuck your feelings.
dumbass hicks.
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just-a-girl-with-a-pistol · 7 months ago
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Its just a cup of tea Venigni....
The chaos agent commits chaos part 2
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angelfoodscake · 8 months ago
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was randomly motivated to animate tonight
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kirin-no-yume · 8 months ago
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Remember when Daigo snuck away from Mine to take a taxi to meet the people who were black mailing him with Kiryu. So Mine bought shares in every taxi company in order to track down which one Daigo took and where and used that to rescue him.
(While Daigo’s own bodyguards waved it off as their chairman sneaking off to have sex. And Mine even knew that Daigo paid off a girl to try and throw them off.)
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masterrainb0w · 9 months ago
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Something about the Oaks and the Divine rights of Kings.
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ithinkdogshouldvote2 · 1 year ago
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YOURE TELLING ME THAT I GOT A TASTE OF TERRY JR AND NOW I HAVE TO FUCKING WAIT 2 GODDAMN WEEKS WHILE ANTHONY BITCH CUCKS ME????? I'm gonna fucking THROW UP.
Update:
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FUCK.
Due to recent developments, I'm freezing myself in a block of ice. Unthaw me in 4 weeks.
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divorce-enjoyer · 4 days ago
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do you think dan and phil have watched iwtv. can someone ask
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novadreii · 2 months ago
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If your life circumstances have always required from you an abnormal amount of strength and resilience, I see you. If your inner child lets out a small sob anytime someone compliments you on that strength, I see you. If that strength translates to you being some form of domineering/abrasive because you learned early on that your lot in life was to take care of yourself because nobody else ever did, I see you. If you are so fucking angry all the time and can't pinpoint why, I see you. If you've had to watch as people you care about continue to abandon you in adulthood because you grew up to be type A, controlling and assertive, I see the fuck out of you. It's not your fault that nobody ever gave you a soft place to land so that you could be your true self. And I won't inundate you with condescending platitudes about how you'll find your person/people one day.
Some of us are lucky, but to depend on external sources for your well being is a crap shoot. I won't tell you to keep looking for your home in other people. Home is where you are. Take that strength you've painstakingly cultivated since you were a child, and quadruple it. Become bulletproof, unbreakable. Don't let anyone else find a fault line in you to exploit ever again.
#personal#as someone who tried the route of opening myself up and trusting others even though every fiber in my traumatized body screamed NO#i have been predictably disappointed over and over and over again#i'm not saying isolate yourself necessarily but cultivate a small circle lock it in and stop desiring others to fulfill you#take what you get as a bonus in life but stop thinking that your fulfillment comes from family and romantic relationships#there's a reason these relationships are the most abusive#the more attached you are the weaker you are i hate to say it#and i swear abusers can smell it on you#make peace with the possibility of being solitary in life because until you do others will always be able to control you#i'm sorry that you were fed lies about love and human connection#but the reality is that to most people you are an npc in their life#men are not waiting to be your happily ever after or to finally let you rest after a lifetime of abuse#no matter WHAT they say or how convincingly#if you're a woman seeking a man know that they primarily desire to fuck you and to possess you as a status symbol. that's it.#listen i used to be a love is all you need girl but experience and copious amounts of therapy have taught me that i am all i need.#childhood trauma#childhood abuse#abusive relationships#narcissistic parents#btw this is not an invitation to try and prove me wrong i am happy to have mutuals i interact with#but i am no longer taking applications for new friends or partners#after careful culling the remaining family and friends i have love and care for me just fine i am more than satisfied#now that i've learned how to actually love myself properly there is no void i need others to fill#if i never got close to a new person again i'd be MORE than alright
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revenge-of-the-assbutt · 17 days ago
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i feel sick
#every time i think im over her#that she cant hurt me anymore#days like tuesday happen and i miss her so fucking much#i just want my mom#not this narcissist that replaced her when i was 11#i know she was like this before just to my dad#but i just want the mom that drove me to school every morning and took me to seaworld and the schools pta game night and did pizza fridays#i want to call her and hug her and have her tell me that its all going to be alright#but it wont#and that mom doesnt exist#maybe she never did#fuck i cant do this anymore#i was doing so fucking well#i was so fucking happy#why did she have to ruin it with her 40 essay-texts and email stalking?#and the boys are home now too#and i have to act like their mother didnt just force her way back into my life to bring up memories that make me want to claw my chest open#i have to act happy as my youngest brother gets his phone blown up with texts i know are from her#when i know that shes targeting him now that i left#like she did to me when my dad left her when i was 11#i cant do this anymore#i just cant#i cant spend my days throwing up in the school bathroom and crying myself to sleep and burying myself in shows to not feel anything real#i keep feeling like the other shoe is going to drop#that shes going to come to my college and tell her lies to everyone and ill lose all my friends and everyone who matters to me#and i cant even block her because she controls my fucking health insurance#the last time i talked to her she threatened to file for conservatorship#i cant do that
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boygirlctommy · 2 months ago
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listened to all i ask of you again. andrew llyod webber give me custody of christine daae
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vampiremourning · 11 months ago
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anyway as soon as i pry myself off this couch im gonna share some screenshots of bg3 protags on my sideblog. just gotta like. reach the desk first.
#all i can think about is the shelves im gonna get installed here over the next little bit fdghj#yall dont understand its so hard to keep things clean and brain friendly when you just dont have anywhere to put stuff.#hellish#& then i get overwhelmed and turn into a massive bitch when i try to get it under control fdgh#instead its been like. 2 straight days of dopamine i fucking swear?? my body probably definitely wouldnt let me do this for a living#(my hip is screamingggg dfghgjj) but actually if i could & if i could work in a team then yeah. ykw i enjoy it.#organization go brrrrrrr#i dont think she was expecting me to work that fast either but ive been like a feral animal. skittering over clutter.#finding Spots for Things#okay i lied the flood was actually beneficial in one way to me specifically.#estranged father just forgot a Bunch of tool sets here & ive claimed them now fdghjk#that nail gun is MINE#she suggested i look out for an actual tool chest/bench thing (ykw the ones with wheels and stuff) for everything and i havent been that#excited for anything in months fdgh tools are expensive alright. too bad he took the table saw.#i dont talk much abt my Masc Hobbies as i call them lmao no real reason to but hoooboy i love to Build Things#give me that ikea desk ill have it done in an hour or less every time#maybe trade school is still on the horizon for me gfhj always wanted to Weld Stuff i think id be good at it#as much as i fuckin loathe yard maintenance i was a real garage sooooo bad its not even funny#shame i wasnt just inherently expected to know car stuff tm i feel like i would have loved it too#scarrier to learn on your own later in life especially with a lease vehicle but ill get there eventually#anyway yeah bg3! new mods. new ocs#have not done much with them yet but they Exist and theyre pretty
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gibbearish · 4 months ago
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btw similar to the whole "if you try adderall at a party and it calms you down, get an adhd test" thing, if at some point in your life you try microdosing shrooms with a friend and end up feeling like a functional person for the first time in your life, get tested for depression. like yeah hallucinogens come with elation so youre probably gonna have some "this is the best ive ever felt in my life" vibes regardless, but like. if that in and of itself feels like finally breathing in for the first time in years, thats for sure a sign that something is up with your ability to process serotonin most of the time. feeling better than ever before should be a nice bonus, not a crushing weight off your chest
#fun fact there are currently multiple ongoing studies vis a vis the effectiveness of psilocybin on depression#both on its own and as a companion to ssris#psylocybin targets the 5ht2a serotonin receptors which wikipedia tells me are more numerous in the brains of those with depression#so like. if you spend most of your life feeling like your brain is an aquarium with a leak in it and serotonin is the water and your default#state is 'slightly damp gravel grinding painfully against itself' thats ummm not normal 👍#and on the flipside of that if you have depression that no other med has worked for and know a guy. its 1000% worth it#origibberish#also i say 'wikipedia tells me' as if i just looked it up but that all comes from a long night of spite filled research after i asked my#psychiatrist if we could use the fact that psylocybin worked for me as a basis to like. narrow down which legal antidepressant#might work instead of basically just throwing darts at a board every time#and after several minutes explaining to her that i was not just asking her to prescribe me shrooms but in a legal way she went#'ohhhh yeah no unfortunately theres been no research into that‚ yeah.... sorry......:)'#which. as far as 'lies you come up with on the spot to avoid having to say i dont know' go‚ that is. maybe the worst one to pick#like. 'no‚ thats not an option'? alright fine maybe theres some internal rules or something who knows#'theres no research' though just. immediately tanks any and all credibility 100% even on its own but considering the subject matter?#youre telling me. that humans. the famously curious species that researches fucking Everything. and also Loves playing with drugs. when#trying to figure out how to make drugs that make brains feel good. would not start with the drugs they already knew made brains feel good.#youre telling me that not one (1) singular scientist tried shrooms and went 'oh my god wait. i dont feel like im dying for the first time#ever. holy fuck i need to study this'#complete misplay. absolutely legendary fumble. there were so many ways to fuck it up and somehow you found the worst. congratulations#om the other hand though. really was an excellent setup for the punchline that is the voicemail i have from them saying she'd been fired LOL#they didnt say what for specifically but yknow. based on my own experiences i certainly have theories jebfksbfk#it was annoying in the moment but at the end of the day i have shrooms and she doesnt have the job so. whos laughing now emily KSBFKSBFKDN#this is what i mean though like. rn i feel fine. not on top of the world‚ not like a god#just. fine. i just dont feel like shit. i feel like i can do stuff if i want to‚ or chill peacefully and have it actually be. relaxing.#i dont feel like gravel right now‚ i feel like a person.#and god what a fucking relief it is#really i guess the moral overall is that if at any point you react to trying a new drug the same way an addict craving a hit for days would#then there maybe is something up with your brain chemistry because that means your default state of existence is comparable to that#of withdrawal. a famously shit experience
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alix-is-o-a-k · 1 year ago
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FUCK THE THEME SONG HIT ME SO HARD AT THE END
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fettery-fetterie · 5 months ago
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I'm the real fake idgafer I will vaguepost about it on tumblr.com
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fingertipsmp3 · 6 months ago
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Ughhhhhhh I hate writing and I hate not writing and I hate myself
#nearly bought a digital typewriter today. actually i DID buy a digital typewriter today. officially yes i have bought a digital typewriter.#the money for the digital typewriter has left my account but i have emailed them to cancel the order because i can't in good faith buy#a digital typewriter when i don't fucking WRITE#i thought it might help me get back into it. distraction free and while allowing me to not judge my own writing#and be continuously editing while i write and going 'i'm crap i'm crap i'm crap no one will ever read this and if they do they will think#that i'm garbage and that i should feel bad etc etc etc'#but it's too expensive and i have the feeling i wouldn't even like or use the thing once i got it#because the IDEAS! the ideas aren't coming to me. or rather they are but none of them seem to stick#i feel underconfident in writing any of them#and then i have old projects that i've always wanted to get back to like the tennis romance thing but SO much has changed since i first#started drafting it. like i don't even know if i like the main couple anymore. i kind of want to put both of them with different OCs of min#but it'd switch up the WHOLE story if i had a different cast#in fact most of the problem lies in the fact that i have this long-running bedtime story i tell myself every night with lore#and a massive cast of characters that i switch out depending on who i'm most interested in right now and every so often i incorporate new#themes and ideas and motifs and plot points sometimes based on media i've been watching because it's MY bedtime story and it doesn't matter#if i plagiarise in my own brain. but then obviously i can't plagiarise in real life#and none of my bedtime stories are GOING anywhere. sometimes i only get through a scene or two before i fall asleep#all of which means my bedtime story is not so much a sweeping epic novel but a sitcom with way too many characters#most of which are werewolves to be honest and sometimes for my own wish fulfilment one of them will walk out of my head#and take care of my problems for me by lending me £1million or murdering my best friend's ex. in my mind obviously#so it's like. it's a case of getting in there and annexing off the stuff i think i can use#it's like yeah i've definitely written several romance novels in my head in the process of this but does it matter if they're IN my HEAD#to be honest i feel like my main strength is in creating characters. like i have this one family of werewolves i've been slowly but surely#adding members to since i was like 16. maybe younger? no yeah i think i made the first one when i was 12#they're compelling to ME anyway. i care about them. it's just PLOTS. i can't plot#if a book could just be a lot of dialogue and sex scenes and silly moments and character studies i'd be alright#i also can't describe settings. don't ask me to because i can't#and now i'm just annoyed with myself because i sat down at my laptop to try to write and instead i'm here complaining about how i don't wri#and if i had the digital typewriter... i mean i'd probably still be doing this i'd just no longer have £300#i don't have the £300 anyway. i hope to christ they refund my card i'm a fucking idiot
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