#ANGEL THEORY WASNT EVEN A THING YET!!!!!!!!

[nerice]

my vague plan was to do lhnh after having a working main book draft but the recent. decisions abt framing [a path we know its end...] leaves me kind of no choice but to go right into dream game after.. no words can express the amount of rip

[lwieserce]

it's slightly disappointing to me that arlecchino and columbina so far aren't indicated to appear in the same region, all that there is left for me is to hold on to my hope that they survive their respective regions and we can finally see them interact in.... Either snezhnaya or beyond that?

[sailoryooons]

Carved | Four | jjk (m)

→ Summary: Hundreds of years after the Underworld wins the war, Vaesen - demon kind - rule the Realms. The Vanir - creatures of light and the Heavens - are hunted and enslaved by Vaesen. When the demon prince Jungkook is given one of the Carved - angels who have been stripped of their wings - he has no idea what to do with you. You, however, have plans you are determined to see through. Even if it means death in the end.

→ Pairing: demon!Jungkook x angel!female reader

→ Rating: NSFW & 18+ Minors are strictly prohibited from engaging with this content. Any minors discovered interacting with adult content will be blocked immediately.

→ Type: Series

→ Genre: dystopian, urban fantasy, enemies to lovers, angst

→ Pairing: 8,254

→ Warnings: Graphic depiction of violence and fighting, graphic depiction of death and gore, depictions of death (including, but not describing the death of a child and family members), semi-complex fight scenes, mentions of manipulation and power imbalance, reader purposefully seducing Jungkook to get what she wants, mentions of something similar to subspace and reader taking advance of Jungkook in a subspace like state mentally, explicit language, power imbalances and mentions of enslaved creatures, Jungkook and reader get a little violent with one another but like.. in a pleasure able way so here we go for the sexually explicit warnings, reader goading Jungkook, unprotected vaginal sex, fingering, Jungkook kinda gets right too it, rough, slapping and biting, Jungkook being pretty rough and slamming reader around and shoving her into things, vulnerable mental states and manipulation, mild dirty talk tbh this sex scene is incredibly mild in terms of what I usually do, ummm I don't know guys it's a dark urban fantasy with weird shit, unedited should be a warning because I did a grammarly check and nothing else oops. ALSO PLS KEEP IN MIND THIS SEX SCENE IS BLAND BECAUSE OF THE SPECIFIC SCENARIO THEY ARE IN. I ASSURE YOU MUCH MORE DETAILED AND EXPLICIT SMUT IS IN THE FUTURE, BUT IT WASNT THE VIBE HERE

→ Main Masterlist: here

→ Series Masterlist: here

→ faq 

A/N: IT'S FINALLY HERE. Sorry this was so delayed. I was dealing with writers block pretty severely, work has been really crazy and demanding, I've been really tired and also my mentally manipulative ex-boyfriend decided to unalive himself so that was a weird week, I was trying to find new apartments and yeah this chapter has been re-written at least 5 times. Also I apologize I said fuck it we ball and this is absolutely only edited with a grammarly check. I will edit in full tomorrow but I do not have the brain capacity to do it right now, she is Tapped Out but I promised I would post this mf chapter tonight. Does any one have any theories as to what's going on yet teehee.

©2022 haliiimede. all rights reserved. Reposting and/or translating is not allowed, even if you credit the story. Works are only crossposted on AO3. Find my AO3 here.

Disclaimer: All members of BTS are faces and name claims for this story. This is entirely a work of fiction and by no means is meant to be a projection, judgement or representation of real life people. Any scenarios or representations of the people and places mentioned in works are not representative of real life scenarios. Moreover, none of my works accurately reflect, represent or take a stance on the nuances of Korean culture, cities, people etc. BTS is not BTS culturally, intellectually, physically or representationally in my stories, and should be considered name and face stand-ins for made up characters.

/ PREVIOUS / NEXT CHAPTER /

Screams split the air. For a second, you hesitate, turning to the source of the chaos. It erupts beyond the door, startling several Vaesen inside of the room. You react first, shooting toward the door with Taehyung and Jungkook on your heels.

The sound that greets you is a symphony of shattering glass, surprised screams and varying degrees of carnage. A table flips in front of you as you enter the main ballroom. You sidestep it easily as it fractures against Taehyung, who hardly flinches before vanishing into the surging crowd of running and swarming Vaesen and Vanir.

With careful movements, you slid out of your heels, feet pressing against broken glass. It doesn’t bite or cut your skin – only real weapons can do that – but it’s uncomfortable as you take a defensive stance, aware how vulnerable you are in a tiny, sheer dress and no weapon.

Blood-slicked floors greet you. The screams of the Vaesen make your lips twitch upward slightly. Chaos has erupted in a tableau of overturned tables, shattered champagne glasses, pearl-draped demons hiding behind fractured, round tables, and a dark, wet hissing sound.

Whatever creatures have entered the room smell wrong, like honey gone sour or sweet cream curdled. Your eyes sweep the painting of chaos before you.

And then you see them.

Your heart stills for one painfully long second, stretched like skin pulled too tight over bone. They’re… seraphim but not.

The creatures have dark, pitted eyes with black veins rippling over sallow skin. They’re naked and feature no distinct gender, appearing stitched together. Their ribs are prominent and you’re unsure if it’s by design or emaciation. There are mismatched wings on their bodies, opening and closing uncontrollably at awkward intervals and angles like they don’t know how to use them - or maybe can’t.

A creature lets out a screech and cuts a vampire lord in half, blood spraying the wall like watercolor on canvas. There is a dozen of them, and they all have swords, crudely shaped but you can almost taste the adamas in the swords.

Fucking hells. They have swords of Heaven.

Jungkook appears at your side, dark eyes scanning the room as the Not-Seraphim spread throughout, cutting through screaming party goers who are unarmed beyond their own fangs and teeth. You can scent gore in the air and your blood hums: it smells like a killing pitch.

“Reaper.” Jungkook says the name like a command. The name is both yours and not yours. It is one of many names. One of many people you are. His voice slithers down your back, eliciting a shiver. He holds out a dagger. Reaper is the person Jungkook needs you to be. “Find my niece.”

You take the dagger and come alive. The hellstone throbs in your hand, metal carved from the deepest pits of the underworld and forged in hellfire. You tighten your grip and move forward.

One step and you’re in front of one of the Not Angels. It cocks it’s head and pauses, a series of clicks slipping through black, jagged teeth and a weeping mouth.  

A second step and death follows you.

Flesh burns. It singes your nose, something like spoiled flesh and rotten eggs. You can taste the sulfur as the creature wilts to the floor, body still twitching after decapitation. You bend over, snatching up the poorly made sword. It’s sharp enough, but the handle is crude and the blade is splotchy, mixed with many metals.

It hums in your hand, a pulse of power crawling through your palm and fingers like an electric current. You recognize the feel of adamas, a metal only found in Heaven realms deep in cloud-ringed mountains. For a moment your mind drifts, suspended between memory and imagination. You can almost see it: tangerine pink skies, the smell of orange blossoms, wind that is neither cold nor warm.

A creature lunges at you and the dream melts away. You duck under the blow, striking out with the dagger. It plunges to the hilt, a wet crack sounding as you puncture its ribcage. It screams and spittle flies. It doesn’t react to the knife, clawing toward you and opening a split maw of blood and black.

Cringing backward, you push with the dagger, shoving the creature away to provide space for the swing of your sword. The head severs, hitting the ground with a thud before rolling away. The body jerks, remaining vertical for a moment. Ripping your knife out, you send the lifeless body to the ground where it remains dead.

Interesting.

Another creature replaces the felled one, no weapon in hand but claws raking out at you. You shuffle backward, ducking away from the swiping talons. The creature flaps its wings once – the only one with functional wings, it seems – and surges forward, catching you off guard.

It knocks into you with the weight of a brick wall. The air leaves your lungs and you go down with the creature, it’s talons catching the flesh on your right bicep. You scream at the burn and fuck it burns. You look at where your skin burns black and wilted in three, jagged lines.

A blue-sparked flame catches your attention on the creature’s hands as it gnashes at you. You grab it around the throat, keeping razor teeth away from your face as drool and something else drips on your face. Your eyes zero in on the flame that comes and goes like it can’t control the heat on the tips of its fingers.

Hellfire, you realize.

Your mind expands, a searching radar for Jungkook. You sense him immediately, his mind like mist and rain tinged with hatred. His emotions are in turmoil, a churning storm of icy rain that bites into your thoughts and razor-sharp wind. There is a sense of no control, Jungkook’s churning storm ripping through his energies with something like feral-laced panic on the edges.

Jungkook, you call to him, feeding him your emotions as you shove back at the gnashing teeth of the creature pinning you down. He ignores you, his storm too volatile to sense you. You push harder, imagining that you’re brushing cool water down the bridge of your connection.

Jungkook flinches when he feels you. The storm pauses, like passing into the eye as the chaos settles around him. You use the opportunity to speak again. They can use Hellfire.

It takes a moment for him to respond. Understood.

Pulling away from the connection, you keep your minds tethered. The crackling energy and harsh storm stirs again when you pull from his mind, but it’s not as out of control as before, the thread between you an anchor as he refocuses on his own task.

Lightning crackles under your fingers as you shove with your hand, putting all your force into where you push back on the monster above you. The creature topples backward as you roll to your feet, movement fluid. Your dress is ripping near the throat, threatening to tear. You curse, begging the fabric to stay on a little longer.

You have no intention of fighting while spilling out of your dress.

Electricity charges in the room. Unchoked, you feel the thunder of your power looming on the horizon. Every time you call the lightning to you feels like a rush of adrenaline, the sparks dancing along every nerve of your body, lighting you up from the inside out.

This is your power. There is a moment where you consider letting it all go. You could supernova right where you stand, destroying everything within several miles. You know you have the capability – it's something you’ve dreamed of doing for years.

But it’s just a dream, and your dreams do not align with your goal.

Reigning in the urge to destroy destroy destroy, you instead focus the lightning on the creatures closest to you. The bolts let out a loud crack as you direct the energy to your targets. There is a flash and the smell of burnt skin and corpse, but you ignore it, pushing toward a forming group in the corner of the ballroom.

There is a concentration of fighting Vaesen, screaming and creatures near where you remember seeing Jungkook’s niece last. A body topples in front of you, and you step over it- later you will remember that it was a collared Vanir, naked and still tied to a chair on its leash.

You see Jihoon– he's covered in something black and slick, kicking out at one of the creatures. He has a single dagger in his hand, a retinue of guards dead at his feet, and you can hear the high-pitched scream of his daughter behind him. A single step in their direction is blocked by more creatures, hissing and clicking at you.

Jungkook appears at your side, covered in gore. His hands are black to the wrist, dripping in... something. You realize he’s fighting without a weapon.

“Are you ripping through them?”

“I gave you my knife,” he snaps. His mind brushes against yours, a torrent of chaos and loud noises and anger so hot you waver. You toss the dagger to him, spinning your new sword in your hand. “I think beheading them is the only thing that works.”

“Yeah, I discovered that thanks.”

A vampire gets turned to mist and splatter in front of you. You feel the hot blood hit your face. It smells metallic and like Synth from his last meal.

“Can you-”

You see it in his mind. The lightning that you can summon to destroy worlds. You nod once, summing the crackling energy inside of you.

A high-pitched scream interrupts you. Your eyes zero in on Kita, hiding under a table as her mother pulls the girl tight against her chest, baring her teeth. There's a red aura around her as she snaps her teeth at one of the creatures, a red arch of fire snapping out.

Fox fire.

Kita tries to imitate her mother, crying through barred teeth and a tiny flicker of flame humming around her. There are creatures closing in and you feel the snap of your power, targeting the creatures in a large area.

Power ripples in the room. You feel the urge to kill kill kill again. To destroy. To light the entire room up and burn it all down. You’ve done it before. You know the taste and smell of annihilation. You know the feeling of death brushing past you as he collects his dead.

The crack of a whip. A scream of agony. Blood in your mouth your hands your ears your neck, your arms-

You push away the desire to rebel. It burns bright, a hot coal ready to catch fire but you smother it. Pretend it isn’t there.

Rising up at the wrong time does nothing. Freeing yourself a long game. Giving in to your rage means failure, and you have failed and failed and failed and failed and -

The room flashes bright. Colors dance behind your eyes as you let go of the power. For a moment, everything is silent. The world is warped, the sulfur air charged with electricity. You feel the static tickle the nap of your neck, your arms, your mind.

You look around. There are no more creatures standing, black wisps of smoke curling toward a scorched ceiling. Dust motes float down. You stick out a hand, finger pointed as one lands on your finger. You realize it’s soot, the leftovers from the creatures you’ve thoroughly crisped.

Around the room, life – or what’s left of it – begins to stir. Glass crunches beneath feet and the sound of tables being righted sounds booming in the silence of destruction.

Jungkook and Ji-Hoon are on their knees, ducked under the table as they coax Kita and her mother from their hiding spot.

You assess the damage, eyes scanning the room and catching on golden collars. Diamonds resting on the hollow of still throats. Snapped gossamer wings under a broken body. A platinum leash tangled in a chair, its nymph counterpart missing her lower half.

There are more Vanir than Vaesen among the dead. Caught up in leashes and collars. Stuck in a brass birdcage. Shackled to a table. Your stomach turns but you don’t focus on the faces. Committing them to memory makes them mean something and nothing means anything to you.

“Reaper.” Jungkook’s voices radiates the space between you and the space unseen, echoing in your mind. You turn to look at him. He has a firm grip on Kita, the child pressed to his side as Ji-Hoon argues with his wife silently. “We are escorting them out.”

“We’re with you.” The oily voice makes you stiffen. You don’t have to turn to see Taehyung among the aftermath. You do see the kitsune lingering off to the side, his dark eyes flickering from the ashes to you. “Both of us.”

Jungkook bows his head. “They were concentrated around Ji-Hoon and none of his men remain. It’s safe to assume he’s a target. Reaper and Yoongi with Kita and Daiyu. Taehyung with us.”

Taehyung moves past you, no longer interested in teasing you. Jungkook presses close to his brother and you press Kita and Daiyu between you and Yoongi. The huli jing looks at you skeptically, holding her daughter’s hand fiercely. You don’t give it much thought, following Jungkook’s lead as he leads your group through a service entrance.

It smells like sulfur and rot. Damp air clings to your skin, forming a sticky second layer. You grimace. The clack of dress shoes is loud against the tile floors. The hall is too narrow for you to walk in groups, meant for only a few Vanir to come and go at a time. You move quickly in single file line, Yoongi at the front with Kita and Daiyu between you.

Jungkook’s mind waivers on the edge of yours. You can feel that he’s aware of you, as though he is turning over his should to see if you’re still there. You can’t see him from the back of the line, but he doesn’t severe the connection.

Probably don’t know how.

Servant corridors are long and complicated. When Jungkook approaches a split, he takes one hall over another confidently. You peek into his mind, seeing the flash of blueprints and memory of a layout on a screen.

You know the layout of the servant halls, you observe. Down your connection, you sense him flinching. You knew you would be attacked?

No. His voice is curt. His mind is a dark storm, words cutting through hissing rain. But we are always prepared. It’s not often that someone tries to assassinate us, but...

But what?

Focus on your task.

Your lips twitch and you feel him draw away from you a bit. But what? You wonder. He was hiding something and that just wouldn’t do. Cutting into his mind would be as easy as clipping the wings of a butterfly. But you leave Jungkook alone for now, following the dark hall, Taehyung and Jihoon’s hushed voices drifting toward you.

A small door in the hall, nearly invisible leads to a tunnel. You can still see flitting images and thoughts across Jungkook’s memory. He has no control to his thoughts, no way to block you out. He is unaware of the danger you present to his mind, laid open for the taking.

And yet you don’t.

The ground slopes beneath your feet. Your press your fingers on the wall, casting your senses. There’s damp, empty air on the other side of the wall and you can hear the hush of slow floating water. Above you, the ceiling vibrates. You’re in a tunnel in the sewers.

Your eyes drift to Jungkook. He was trained in escape routes in the building. And seemed to be one of the few Vaesen armed at the party.

Unarmed Vaesen. The thought leads you somewhere between pleasure and contempt. Only the creatures of the Underworlds could be so arrogant as to think they have nothing to fear. In a way, they don’t. Demons and their kind are the apex predators, the top of the food chain.

But even among themselves, enemies lurk.

The sheer stupidity is comforting – the knowledge that it comes at the expense of how little of a threat Vanir pose, is not.

A cool awareness brushes against the nape of your neck. You pause, the echoes of shoes and Kita sniffing silently ahead reverberating off the walls. Your instinct flickers and you turn your head a fraction, angling your ear toward the way you came.

Silence stretches and stretches. You frown, stretching out the net of your mind. It’s a strange feeling, opening that barrier and sense of other. It’s not a psychic ability as much as it is sensing energy, magic, and existence, something many Vanier and Vaesen alike can do.

At first, there is nothing but empty space. Ahead of you, your group pushes on. They don’t notice that you’ve stopped entirely, head cocked and tense.

Then you hear it – or at least perceive it. A soft hiss, the smell of death.

They’re here, you hiss down the tether between you and Jungkook. You feel his surprise and then his anger as you turn to face the back of the tunnel. Keep going and let me know when you’re out of the tunnel. If I light up in here, you’re going down too.

Good to know you care.

You scoff. I still have use for you, Dominus.

Something like irritation and resentment slithers down the connection from Jungkook. It makes you smirk, pleased at offering opposition. It’s been a long time since you could openly oppose someone the way you now can. It’s a risk, but it’s a calculated one.

Sometimes you must let the monster in to give it a sense of comfort. You remember the lesson. You think about the Vaesen who so easily move about the world without weapons.

Yes, letting Jungkook see parts of you is necessary. Dangerous, but ultimately worth it.

Shuffling, stilted movements echo toward you. Sliding your feet apart and bent slightly at the knee, you wait in a defensive stance. You leave the connection to Jungkook open. As you wait for the creatures to reach you, you periodically drift to observe Jungkook and the others. They’re making quick work rushing through a network of tunnels, moving faster now that there is a threat.

Lightning will do you no good in an enclosed space. While you won’t kill yourself, the walls of the tunnel are reinforced with metal rods and bracketing, a perfect conduit for electricity. With the running water crisscrossing in the sewer system just behind, you’re positive you’ll light up half of the underground network if you try it.

So you wait. Sword in your hand. Poised.

The first creature slides into your line of sight. The corridor is dark and without light, the shapes of the bent wings in a small space almost comical. They cannot move more than one at a time, a single file line of twisted limbs and rotten smell.

It sees you and pauses. There are soft clicks, the sounds bouncing back and forth. You frown, watching as they all stop moving, the clicks drifting between them at different intervals and cadences like… a language.

They’re speaking.

Whatever they are, they have some sort of intelligence. The humanoid shapes are all wrong, but you can vaguely sense something thrumming inside of them that is both like you and not. Your stomach flips at the implication that you can sense the creatures the way you sense Jungkook stopped at a fork in the tunnels, unsure of which way to go.

The clicking stops. You turn your attention away from Jungkook, narrowing that feed of awareness tied to him to the barest thread. For a moment, you and the first creature stare at one another. The next moment, it’s charging forward faster than you expect.

You duck as the creature slams into you. The breath leaves your lungs, feeling as though you’d been hit with the force of a thick wall, but you push up with your back as the creature topples over you, sending it sprawling. Your sword hand is fast, flicking in an arch to sever the head as the creature stumbles to regain balance.

The narrow space immediately becomes a problem. The next creature is on you, teeth snapping hungrily as you back up, stepping and slipping slightly on the ichor leaking from the dead body beneath your feet. There’s no room to swing your sword, so you’re forced to twitch the blade back and forth, parrying sharp stabs from your assailant.

Just like the creatures in the ballroom, these are uncoordinated. Their stabs aren’t fast enough, joints cracking and twisting awkwardly in lurching motions as they attack. Cutting through them is difficult in the lack of space. They press in on you, making you track backward to give yourself more room to fight. It’s not ideal – you’re leading them toward where Jungkook and the others have started moving again.

“Fuck,” you snarl, tasting foul ichor on your tongue as it sprays you from a sharp wound on the neck of one of them. It bellows and claws forward.

Summoning air in the tunnel you thrust a hand out, punching toward them with wind. It rips through the halls, whistling as the air rushes past you in violent torrents. It slams into creatures, propelling them backward.

While they’re crumpled and disorganized in a pile, you take ground back, advancing on them. They clamor over one another, shrieking and twitching their wings as they regain a sense of control. You summon wind again, ready to send another blast when a raw scream rips down your mental tether with Jungkook.

It’s violent and invasive, prying open your connection and funneling unfiltered pain and wrath into your own mind. Your vision goes white for a second as the emotional tidal wave of Jungkook overwhelms you, unexpected and uncontrolled.

A spark of blue is the only warning you get from one of the hellish creatures. You barely react in time, summoning wind again at a greater force. It screams toward you, quick enough to meet the blue flame of Hellfire as it fills the hallway.

Heat scorches against air. You scream in alarm. For a moment, you think your makeshift airwall won’t be enough to keep you from being turned to soot.

It holds, a steady wind current coming down the tunnel. Dust, dirt, and mice get picked up in your vacuum, spinning and slamming into the solid, opaque wall of air. You keep your energy focused on the wind as much as you can, Jungkook’s mental screaming almost too much of a distraction as you try and close the mental door between the two of you.

But Jungkook is untrained and the son of Sariel. His connection to you is strong and whatever he’s experiencing on the other side of the tunnel system is a deeper well than you knew he was capable of.

Gritting your teeth, you dig down into your well of power. It’s always there, a bottomless pit of energy and ability to use your gifts. Some witches call it magic. Faeries call it glamour. Angels call it grace and there is a spark of it there, tiny and imperfect, but enough for you to sustain the wind and shut the door on Jungkook just enough.

Snippets rush by you. They’re at the mouth of an entrance somewhere – almost out of the tunnel system. But they’re fighting – you sense more creatures and… others. Demons. Jungkook’s rage is a storm, battering down on your connection to him and exploding out of him as he fights.

Get out of the tunnels, you demand. Jungkook I need you to at least get out of the tunnels.

There is no acknowledgment that he’s heard you. There’s only screaming wind, the song of his fury, and heat building up on the other side of your wall. You smell molten metal and realize the creatures are going to bring everything down.

Jungkook, you scream at him. There is nothing on the other side, just anger threatening to swallow him whole. Jungkook!

Nothing.

Gritting your teeth, you shift a few steps back. You take a deep breath, feeling the heat on the other side of your air wall, and you shove hard through your mental tether. You feel Jungkook’s awareness, fire and rain. He feels you now.

Get out the fucking tunnel or I will kill all of you. This is your last warning.

And it is. Jungkook is useful. Using him is easier than the alternative, and having to come up with an additional plan after killing him while trying to escape the city is far too complicated, and near the realm of impossibility.

Sweat begins to form on your hairline. You feel the slick on your legs and your palms, the air over-warm. It continues to get hotter and hotter, kicking up several notches. Azure swims on the other side of the air you feed into your protect. It flares, growing stronger off the oxygen you provide it, but you have no other choice.

Silver drips from the ceiling. You look up, spotting liquified metal oozing through the earth’s ceiling.

Go. Jungkook’s voice is nearly a whisper. You realize you’re screaming with the force of the power you’re feeding into your wind. His words are like a release, a flip switching as you dive headfirst into the electric current of your lightning.

It’s an explosion. Heat and electricity meet in a caustic battle, the walls and floor rumbling as your lightning pulses from you more like a wave than bolts. You hear the crack, feel it vibrate your ears, and then there is only loud ringing as you stumble backward.

Dust, ash, and metal fill the air. You’ve brought down half the tunnel and you’re splayed on your ass.

Rolling over on your stomach, you try and push yourself to your feet. You slide in dirt and darkness. It’s difficult to breathe, the air filled with static and heated enough that your skin feels like you’re on fire. You manage to find footing and retreat towards where Jungkook and the others have gone.

Nothing follows you.

The high-pitched ringing does not leave you. A bit dizzy, you follow the thread of Jungkook’s existence, feeling the thread between you pull you toward him. His rage has turned to agony, and you know someone is dead, though you cannot discern who.

When you finally reach the surface, you understand.

There are masked Vaesen littered around an empty warehouse. You’re close to the Celadon River, the taste of salt in the air as it filters in from the sea. You cannot hear beyond the scream of your damaged ears, but the wind here is cool, coming in through a giant hole in the ceiling, freshly singed.

Similar creatures that hunted you into the halls lay in pieces. Jungkook stands expressionless, ringed by bodies. It seems the fight was centered on him, death laying quietly at his feet. Yoongi and Taehyung stand a few feet away, expressionless. Watching.

A single shaft of moonlight shines on Jungkook through the broken ceiling. It paints half of his face silver, his eye rimmed silver. The rest of his face in shadow. It’s an eerie picture, half of him light and dark, split between two worlds. A child slithers down your spine as your eyes drift away from the thunder in his expression to his feet, where his eyes are fixed and you see the source of his unending agony.

Jihoon and his family are no more.

-

Namjoon is the only other person at the apartment. You eye him warily as he stands in the living room, arms crossed over his broad chest as he watches the holoscreen. Images of the party flash on the screen. There are videos from security cameras, starlets filming the chaos while at the party, and media drones outside of the building as the police force descended on the scene.

Reporters stand in the carnage. There are still broken bodies of Vanir, stepped over as the reporters lead their filming drones through the rooms. You can see Vanir tied to leashes on chairs. Again, you don’t look at their faces.

After appearing from the tunnel to find Jihoon and his family dead, you were ushered home immediately. You went without negotiation, casting a single look at Jungkook. He wouldn’t meet your eyes, his expression flitting between exquisite pain and nothingness.

Sensing your presence, Namjoon turns his head a fraction to look at you. His eyes harden and his jaw flexes, onyx eyes not leaving you for a second. You remember your perceived place with him, casting your eyes to the screen to ignore the way he burns holes through you with just a look.

“Go away,” he grunts. “Your presence is bothersome.”

“I’m sorry, dominus.” You make your voice light and airy. “Why has master not come home with me?”

Calling Jungkook master burns your tongue. You make yourself look small, tucking your chin to your chest and curving your shoulders inward, like you’re bracing to be hit. You play with the hem of your shirt, which is too big like the rest of your clothes.

Namjoon scoffs, not buying it. “Because he has to deal with this fucking mess.”

“I should be with master- “

“Drop the act. Whatever you are, it isn’t Carved. If Jungkook wants to keep you and do whatever he wants with you, that’s fine.” You glance up at him. He stares you dead in the eye. “But I don’t like you and I don’t trust you. Stay in your lane, I’ll stay in mine.”

Namjoon leaves the room, the holoscreen casting blue light on the empty space. You listen to him go. He goes to his own room at the far end of the apartment and shuts the door loudly.

“Dick,” you mutter, entering the living room proper to look up at the screen.

The sound is muted, only showing the chaos. “Elide, volume on.”

“State access name,” the apartment system responds, voice cool and clear. You recite your name. “Unregistered user.”

You snarl. “Elide, volume on.”

“State access name.”

“Jungkook.”

“Voice recognition failure.”

“Just turn the fucking volume on!”

The elevator door opens behind you. You whirl on your heel, teeth bared in frustration. Jungkook walks through the door, barely sparing you a glance as he says, “Stop yelling at the technology. I didn’t program you into the system.”

“I noticed.” He walks into the kitchen, tapping the corner of a cabinet. It unlocks and pops open, revealing shelves of liquor. He removes a bottle and taps the cabinet shut. “Didn’t think you needed it.”

“Well if you’d like me to get bored and burn the apartment down, that is an option.”

“Be my guest. I have others.”

“Humble.”

Dark rage hums under the surface. Jungkook moves around his kitchen slowly. He places a glass delicately on the counter, pulling the cork from the bottle before pouring himself amber liquid. You sniff. Whiskey of some sort.

Jungkook is silent, but his mind is a torrent of emotions. Blood pounds beneath the surface, a beast begging to escape. You can almost taste the chaos within him and yet… he keeps it there. Sipping his drink and leaning on the counter as he looks at the floor.

“Namjoon thinks I should kill you,” Jungkook mentions.

“Unsurprising.”

“Yoongi does too.”

You shrug. “The way of the fox is unknown to me.”

Jungkook’s mind is wide open. You reach for it while he sips his whiskey. He doesn’t register as you brush against his thoughts, trying to sort through them. His mental is in chaos, thoughts racing through his head and flashes of his brother being cut down. Of Kita’s screaming.

“Do you know what those things were?”

You picture the creatures at the party. Their staggered steps, their rotting breath. “Something made, not born.”

“What does that mean?”

“That means I’ve seen a lot of creatures for the hundreds of years that I have been alive, but I’ve never seen whatever those were. Those things are not natural.”

“Most of what is in this world isn’t natural.”

“They are not natural to any plane. I felt…” You trail off and shrug your shoulders.

Navigating his mind while it’s in chaos is hard. You’re looking for the thread of conversation from earlier that night, trying to understand what Jungkook had been talking about when he trailed off about being prepared for assassination attempts. But it’s convoluted and murky.

Jungkook glances up at you. His face is a mask. You must admit you’re impressed by the way he looks calm and collected with the storm raging inside of him, threatening to crack the façade at any moment. “Felt what?”

“You didn’t feel them? Like the way you feel me?”

“Are you telling me you’re one of- “

“No,” you cut him off. “Not in the sense of they are me. But you couldn’t feel them like… dots on a radar. Little signatures of something?” He shakes his head. You hum for a moment, letting the silence hang in the air before you say, “Your untrained mind nearly got me killed.”

A ripple of anger goes through him and his thoughts become more confusing. You sense him boiling under the surface, a steady tremor building and building and building.

A frenzy. Jungkook is nearing a frenzy. If you could get him to fall into it…. you examine him. Coming down from a frenzy would put him in a state of compliance and exhaustion, making his mind open to sift through like forgotten paperwork.

You decide to incense him.

 “I mean it,” you snap when he doesn’t answer you. You square your shoulders and let your power drop into the room. “Your level of incompetence is worse than seraphim children. Total lack of discipline and an embarrassment to someone who was sired by Sariel.”

A flip switches.

Jungkook is pushing off the counter and moving toward you but you stand your ground, chin lifted, gaze cutting. His mask has slipped a fraction, lip curled. “What did you just say?”

“I said that your utter lack of control is insulting and beneath your station.”

“You are in no position to speak to me like that.”

You splay your hands. Jungkook heaves a few feet away from him. You see the wheels turning, sense his adrenaline shooting upward. You needle him further. “I think we both agreed that here, I’m in a position to do whatever I want.”

Jungkook is fast. He’s in front of you in moments, hand shooting out to grab you by the throat. You’re not surprised by the action as he slams you against a wall, sneering. But you are surprised by the giddy delight that shoots up your spine as his fingers close tightly around your base.

When he squeezes, it isn’t to cut off your air supply. You recognize the sign of dominance, the grip he has on a vulnerable part of you. It’s the most instinctual form of an alpha trying to regain the upper hand and you’re so delighted that you laugh.

“I own you,” Jungkook whispers. “Whether you want it, or whether I want to. I signed your papers. You are legally mine.”

You lift a leg and wrap it around Jungkook’s waist, tugging him toward you. He balks, hand going slack around your throat as your hips press against his. A wave of pleasure rolls through you but you focus on the way Jungkook stutters, pulling back from you.

“Yeah?” you ask, tilting your head to the side. “You have the upper hand, dominus?” His fingers tighten but he doesn’t respond. You roll your hips into his, feeling the confidence from a moment ago slip through his fingers like sand. “What happened? I thought you owned me?”

“You are walking a dangerous line.”

“You’re doing nothing about it.”

“What do you want from me?” he grits out, teeth clenched. He’s shaking, loss of control so near.

“You own me?” you goad. “Then fucking use me, Jungkook. You’re two seconds from a fucking demonic frenzy and you don’t even have the sense to fall into it.”

“I don’t do that.”

You lean forward. He leans away but you crowd his space, eyes searching. You notice a mole just below his flush mouth, something you’ve never seen before. It’s soft. Endearing. You ignore the observation as your mouth brushes close to his, sharing breath.

“You’re afraid of your demon,” you purr. He says nothing, breathing heavily as he watches you, pupils dilated. “Weak.”

“I’m not afraid.”

“Then feed the demon, Jungkook.”

Jungkook hesitate. You watch him, his jaw working and his eyes staring at you. You see the moment he gives over control to the demon part of him, pupils turning into saucers as his hand grips your throat tight. He leans forward, pressing in on your space until you’re chest to chest and his mouth is at the shell of your ear.

“If you wanted me to fuck you, why didn’t you just ask?”

Your hands go to his biceps, digging your nails in. He hisses, fingers pressing into the sides of your neck to restrict your breathing. “I thought you owned me,” you taunt. “I’m allowed to ask?”

It’s the final push he needs.

A shift happens in Jungkook. Swiftly, he drops you and flips you, slamming you chest first into the wall. It knocks the wind from your lungs, making you gasp as he crushes himself against you, nosing your ear. His breath is hot, sending chills down your spine. You grin, knowing you’ve got him going in the right direction.

You press your ass backwards into him, feeling his semi-hard cock in his pants. In his state, it doesn’t even need to be you Jungkook is attracted to. His demon side is wild, hungry to do anything to destroy, to fuck, to kill.

Demon frenzies enhance lust and violence, like adding fuel to a fire. Jungkook’s flame is stoked, his agony over his family members and his frustration blinding him as he rips the back of your shirt open, your scares and flesh on display for him.

“You want to be fucked like I own you?” he asks, voice low. “Fine.”

It's nothing new, being fucked like you’re owned. But this is different – it feels different. When Jungkook’s hands brush up your spine, they’re not violent. They’re inquisitive. Callused. You shiver under his touch, eyes shutting as he pulls the fabric of the ruined shirt off you.

Your nipples are pressed to the wall, providing friction. You give into it, letting that blissful stimulation bloom inside of you as he nudges your head to the side with his nose.

“Spread your legs,” he demands. His voice is barely a whisper. You do. “Not so talkative now, are we?”

“Is my commentating part of fucking me like you own me, dominus?”

A loud rip splits the air. Jungkook tears through your sweats, warm hands seeking the flesh of your ass. He grips your cheeks firmly, massaging the flesh as he ruts against you slightly. You moan, surprisingly not for effect but at the way you feel.

Rare is the occasion in which someone made you feel good during sex. It isn’t what you’re after, but it’s a bonus, letting Jungkook slip his hand between your legs to brush his finger through your folds. You're not dripping for him, but you let out a breathy sound as pleasure unfurls low in your stomach when he does it.

Even out of control Jungkook shows restrain. Your fascinated, split between panting against the wall as Jungkook’s skill fingers circle your clenching hole, gathering your wetness to slip toward your clit, applying light pressure as he circles the bundle of nerves.

Jungkook dedicates time to getting you worked up. His breath is warm against your ear, low grunts shooting more arousal straight to your core. For the first time in years, you’re dripping for someone. You can feel the slick on Jungkook’s fingers, your pussy warm and swollen for him as he continues to play with you.

Taking control of Jungkook’s thoughts is far from your mind now. You're distracted, fists pressing into the wall as Jungkook slips a finger into your entrance. You gasp, the pad of his finger brushing against your front wall, massaging your g-spot.

“Fuck,” you swear, seeing stars.

It becomes clear Jungkook knows what he’s doing, fucking his finger into you. You can hear the wet-slap of his hand against your pussy, worked up for him now as his clothed cock presses into your ass cheek.

“Such a tight fucking pussy,” he mutters. He doesn't seem to be talking to you as much as himself. “Cock is never gonna fuckin’ fit in here. Hmm. Oh well.”

He pulls his finger from you. You let out an angry sound, eyes flying open to glare at him over your shoulder. He pops the finger in his mouth, momentarily dumbing you as you watch him suck the shine from his finger. He doesn’t look at you when he’s done, hand working to pop the button on his jeans and tug his cock out.

When you look down, you realize that Jungkook is right. He might not fit, and it sends a little thrill through you, watching the way his heavy cock bobs against his shirt, dabbing it with precum as Jungkook only pulls his pants down enough to fuck you.

You’ve spent years tirelessly bouncing on a variety of cock and diving between the legs of mistress after mistress. Sex is not a stranger to you. Sometimes you remember vaguely enjoying a thing or two. Sometimes even when you didn’t like it, your body at least orgasmed.

Being used is something familiar – but you’re not being used now. Even if Jungkook thinks you are. Even as he thumbs the precum from the dark tip of his cockhead to spread it down his thick shaft, Jungkook isn’t in control.

You remember that as Jungkook leisurely pumps himself before brushing the tip through your now sticky folds. You press your cheek against the wall, sighing as he teases you. It feels good. You reach out with your mind, brushing Jungkook’s sightly. His walls are down, vulnerable. Your sneer turns into a loud moan when Jungkook pushes into your pussy on the upstroke.

The stretch is painful, your stomach plummeting as Jungkook splits you open. The glide isn’t slow. His instincts take over and he immediately fucks into you hard and deep, slamming your hips into the wall with his full weight with every thrust.

Jungkook fucks the breath out of you. One hand presses your face into the wall, your cheekbones and jaw throbbing with the force of it. His other hand grabs your hips, holding you in position as he fucks himself into you hard.

Pain-laced pleasure shoots through you. The sounds that drip from your mouth isn’t for show. Your toes curl and your head swims at the way he takes control, fingers pressed into your flesh, cock pressing deep deep deep.

You lose yourself in the slap of flesh on flesh and curses. He spits insults at you, and you growl in response, biting one of his fingers that strays too close to your mouth. You taste blood, grinning as the salt and iron tinged with honey pulls on your tongue. He smacks your mouth, the stinging making you trill with high-pitched laughter.

“Crazy Carved bitch,” he slurs. “Is this what you fucking wanted? To be fucked like this?”

“Fuck me harder, Jungkook.”

He presses your skull harder into the wall. For a moment, you think it might crack under the pressure. But you don’t break, and Jungkook listens, driving into you at a pace that would break anyone else. Anything else. But it doesn’t break you and it feels good to know that it doesn’t. To feel the way your pussy flutters around him as he fucks you with abandon.

So many people have tried to break you. So many. Many have almost succeeded, and yet you prevail. You keep going. You survive. You move on. You wait. You win.

Your orgasm mounts. You feel it building inside of you like the same electricity that gathered in that small hall to destroy. It coils and coils and coils. You become short of breath, sucking in hair as you tremble under Jungkook’s weight. His mind is flayed open and raw for the taking but you wait. Not yet not yet not yet.

Jungkook picks up speed. You feel his pace get sloppy and the change in rhythm pushes you over the edge. You come around him with a scream, vision going white as you hold your breath. You feel your entire body seize up, thrashing under him. Jungkook presses you against the wall, trapping you and making you take it as he thrusts one – two – three more times before coming with a curse.

The pace slows. The sweaty tension between you begins to dissipate. You feel Jungkook pull himself out, cum immediately running down your legs. His energy is lower now and when you manage to catch your breath and look at him over your shoulder, he’s swaying on his feet, fucked out expression on his face. He’s flushed, tip of nose red.

Your legs are shaking and sticky. You take a step toward him feeling the slide of your thighs against one another, made slippery by cum. You hold out a hand and he stares at it, eyes wide, expression blank. He’s in the fall after a frenzy, somewhere dazed between thoughts in his head.

Tentatively, Jungkook takes your hand. You leave the torn clothes on the floor, you leave everything. Namjoon surely heard everything, but the Hellhound minds his business as you lead Jungkook to your room. The half demon, half angel is suddenly pliant for you. Soft at the edges. Mute.

You sit him on the bed and he stares at you. Unmoving. Unthinking.

Brushing your mind against his, you feel nothing but static. The buzz of his thoughts is unorganized and sleepy. You keep the connection open, stepping into the bathroom to wash the cum from your legs, the sweat from your back and the blood from your face. You had not even realized that he split your lip.

In your room, Jungkook doesn’t move. He is listless and calm, steady breathing letting you know that he hasn’t gone to sleep just yet, but that he’s not entirely present.

Slipping into clothes and back into the room, you stand in front of him, eyes flickering over his face. Jungkook looks at you but he’s not really there. A tiny part of you hesitates. Knows that to violate his mind has always been your greatest fear of yourself.

But life isn’t fair, and you have been a slave for hundreds of years. You have suffered and you will suffer again in the future. And though you see something in Jungkook that you recognize, you know that to spare him is to admit weakness.

Pain is inevitable. Pain is constant. Pain is power.

Jungkook knows nothing of these tenants. Knows nothing of the life his mother lived before him, her principles, her heritage.

Sympathy is something you cannot afford to give him. So you push into his mind, seizing his thoughts. He doesn’t put up a fight. He hardly knows what you’re doing as you begin sorting through what’s there.

Minds are unique to each person. Though some of your fallen companions had similarities in the way their memories and thoughts were laid out, everyone had something unique. Jungkook’s mind feels like a thunderstorm at night, soft with the threat of something more. Something melancholy plays there, a tune that is familiar, but you cannot place.

You sift through the night's events. You see things through his eyes. Feel the contempt for those around him. Feel the apathy for the Vanir leashed to chairs and in cages. Feel the unfettered spark of adoration when he sees Kita. Feel the love for his brother, though you had not sensed it upon meeting Jihoon.

And there is love there. Maybe not in the form that humans or texts perceive it. But you taste the sweetness of the affection, and you understand that there are positive emotions when Jungkook looks at his older brother, no matter how complicated.

You sift through to running through the tunnels. Jungkook feels glad that he prepared. They had been worried as of late – there were confirmed movements of the rebel group Libram in the city. Confirmations of assets destroyed and vanishing members of the local government.

This surprises you. You were not aware that the rebels were so familiar with the city yet. The thought of the free cities is so distant from you that it feels odd to conceptualize that there are members of their organization in Lythos.

You follow the thread of Jungkook’s conversation with you from earlier.

But we are always prepared. It’s not often that someone tries to assassinate us, but...

But Jungkook had known that there was a growing presence of Libram in the city. And Belial had tortured you repeatedly for information on Libram, looking for any connection to the rebellion. To Michael. To the last remaining seraphim across the worlds.

You take a sharp breath. Jungkook’s feelings regarding Libram were wary. Laced with uncertainty and fear. You follow those thoughts, flipping through his memories looking for more information. Four assassinations on government officials. The destruction of one of the Kim’s synth mines. Liquidation of accounts that belonged to Belial through unknown methods and hackers.

For as long as you had belonged to Faustus to fight, you had kept your head down. You focused on living. Small moves and counter moves. You had not been looking for any news of Libram or their existence in the city, and until now, you had thought there weren’t many in the city. Whispers of the potential but nothing like what you’re seeing in Jungkook’s thoughts.

Carefully, you extract your mind from his and sit on the bed. With him tired and swaying, you offer him a nudge to go to sleep. He lays backwards, dark lashes fluttering shut. You watch him for a while, thoughts ruminating on the new information.

Libram being in the city is a factor that you did not calculate. You chew on your lips as you think of your next move. One way to gather the information you need would be through your Vanir contacts. You have so few. But the best way to get good information is through your Vaesen contacts, which are even fewer.

You think about the twisted creatures that killed Jungkook’s family. They did seem like... angels and demons twisted together. Like the stitching together of things that didn’t belong. Half-demons, half-angels were rare to begin with. But it was like they were trying to make something else.

Belial’s question comes back to you about Lilins. The children of Lilith herself, born from her savage rape of the Heavens, but specifically, the archangels. Unique creatures, with the perfectbalance. Enough demon blood to hide the angelic blood, and enough angelic blood to hide the demon.

The flicker of familiarity you felt when fighting those creatures sends a sinking feeling to the pit of your stomach. You look at Jungkook, asleep. He looks gentle in his sleep, lines smoothed out on his face. Round and childlike.

In the morning, you’ll go back to pretending. But for now, you pull your knees to your chest, setting your chin on top of them as you consider the options before deciding that you need to follow the sick feeling that twists your gut.

Because if you’re suspicions are right... Libram made those creatures that killed Jungkook’s family tonight, targeting Belial and his children. It puts you in a dangerous position, but also a favorable one if Libram discovers your existence and grows curious about how useful you might be.

Yet none of it relieves you. Because if those creatures are what you think they are, there are seraphim in the world that are trying to bring Lilins back to the fight. Lilins, the creatures solely responsible for bringing the Heavens down.

-

D E F I N I T I O N S

Adamas - metal made from the Heavens, favorite in weapons used by angels and fae

Carved – angels who have had their wings surgically removed and sold for ownership. The possession of an angel’s wings gives the owner power over the angel’s grace, thereby giving them power over the angel.

Collared – a Vanir who is owned as a slave. They are often identifiable by the custom collars their masters put on their necks.

Dominus – term used by a slave to their male identifying master

Huli jing - Chinese fox spirit; similar to the Kitsune

Lilins - the offspring of the First Demon, Lilith, an the seraphim, most notably with the angels Uriel and Raphael. They are the perfect balance of Vanir and Vaesen and were used as spies during the war.

Seraph - a single angel, one of the seraphim

Seraphim - species of angels associated with Christian heaven, soldiers of God

Triumvirate – the three Lords who rule the Realms – figures of the Underworld

Vaesen – creatures associated with Underworld Realms such as demons, daevas, sorcerers, vampires, wraiths, and monster-like creatures

Vanir – creatures associated with Heaven Realms such as angels, faeries, witches, dragons, demigods and any heavenly-like being

-

I am no longer doing a tag list. After several attempts to get this tag list to work and Tumblr refusing to tag correct/process the post, I just took them off. I'm removing taglists for 2023 anyways because of how difficult tagging has become (incorrect usernames, Tumblr eating tags, copy and pasting not working).

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[thefandom-casserole]

Episode 50 Notes-

Very very excitedddddd

Eeeeeeeeeeee abhhhha ahhansnsnsnsnsndg

This intro 😭 

The dolphinsssssss 

I have no idea what just happened in that intro omg

Taylor is a demon!!!! Taylor hasn’t hit demon puberty yet — how did Nicky get it then???

Taylor Teen Fact: Taylor used to do the chocolate for his baseball team going door to door. But, his mom just bought them all instead

TAYLOR DID BASEBALL

I NEED TO WEITE SOMETHING ABOUT THAT

:> he did all the last names!!

Linc Teen Fact: Linc cleans up for his parents every single morning (both of them think the other one did it). Linc wakes up really early in the morning 

Normal Teen Fact: Normal also sold chocolates and offered to sell way too much of them, couldn’t do it (and because it’s not vegan chocolate his family can’t even buy it!) and now is in debt

Scary Larry Fact: Larry is based off of a tweet on a reply to Elon Musk (Larry is not from the school) 

Scary Teen Fact: Before the release of her album she was going to release a musical (a soft boy musical, but then she realized it was just Dear Evans Hansen)

Larry Fact pt.2: Larry’s favorite show is the Big Bang Theory because it deals with an important scientific principle

IT MIGHT BE THE FINAL EPISODE

I THINK NOT BECYASE ITS NOT LILE TRENDING IN THNBLR OR SOEMTHJNG

AND I THIBK PEIPLE WOULD HE DREKAING OYT MORE

BUT OMG

THE HEARTATTACK

I REACTED EXACTLY LIEK THEY DID

HOLT SBKT

WHAT IF JT IT THOUGH 

Anthony Fact: He should’ve come up with a different name than Daddy Master - Like chaperone or whatever (The rest of the cast disagreees)

They’re all still separated!!!!

Of course Normal thinks Larry’s cool 😭 

Omg all the Linc shippers are eating so far

Linc’s adamants towards Taylor, him wanting to find Scary, him actually being with Normal

Chester and Julia gave Linc therapy!!!

“Linc are you happy?” “No of course not, that’s a silly question nobody’s happy” SOBBING SOBJNG OKG OMG GRANT YOU FUCKWD THIS KNE UP SO BAD

(Obviously it was more than just that and that was a gross oversimplification but you understand what I’m getting at)

Lincccc :cccc

“I’m definitely broken” OMG LINC 

That glass analogy was so fucking good holy shit “And probably they’ll just throw it away because who wants to fix a glass” 

Hhhhhhhhhhhhh

Linc likes stickers!!!!!!!!

Matt Arnold is bringing it this episode

He wasn’t joking when he said that he was gonna get through it all

In a sense

A NAT ONE FROM TAYLOR

THERE WAS NEVER A WKRLD WHERE IT WASNT THAT OMG

I LOVE THAT SO MUCH

Into the papersssss into the papers (to the tune of into the thick of it)

Initiative to fight the Angel!!!!

This whole thing with the paper is reminding me of the fight with book castle when Ron disappeared into the books against Well Actually

I just paused the episode and listened to the trailer because I just realized I never listened to it 

Ahahahahahahahahah the background music in it though it’s lovely

Omg dude I never realized that Lark doesn’t mention Scary in the video because she wasn’t there!!!! Ayyyyy

Okay done with that back to the episode

Beth playing Larry is my new favorite thing now

She should just play Larry season three

I beg

Oooooo the throne’s empty!!!!

Larry should be king of hell

Larry reminds me of if Paeden was evil and annoying

What is it with Linc and Taylor and the sweet prince thing 😭 

I love them so much

The Swiftli shippers are eating this episodeeeee

Fancy Anthony voice

He was a pissomancer 

Omg

That’s insane

Piss boy Wilson’s again!!!!!

Heaven photoshopppp

INSPIRATION AYYYYY

A 22 😭 

Lincccccc linccccc

Angst episode :cccccc

Oooo Angel’s are yummy??

Taylorrrr nooooo

Taylor and his carts 😭I love him so much

Sisyphus just pushing a meatball up the hill 😭 😭 😭 

Nooooo this is one of my favorite bits

Linc loves his friends so much

God I fucking hate Willy

god god god he’s so gross

YOOOOO LARRY AND WILLY THATS INSANE

OMG OMG OMG

WILLY’S DEEPEST DARKEST SECRET HOLY SHIT AHAHAHHAHAHAHHA

If they got Willy in the paper sea I wonder what would happen

“I tried to kill my son”

“I will do anything to not be submerged in water ever again”

“I did not have sex with Marilyn Monroe, I could not get it up so I stood there and had her sing things to me for a couple hours so I jerked off”

FUCK WILLY FUCK WILLY

FUCK WILLY

DOOD’S DEEPEST SECRET IM LOOSING MT MIND

“I’m scared”

Dood babyyyyyy

THEYRE STILL A BAD GURL AHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAH

LARRY LARRY LARRY 

I BELIVE IN YOU

AWWWWW

Dood babyyyyy nooooooo

“This isn’t your fault Dood”

“No I think it is”

LINC OH NOOOOO

I cannot believe Taylor convinced Vince to change his name

Taylor Swift the piss genius

Freddie’s voice as Taylor was backtracking made me laugh way way too hard way to much that’s insane

It always was gonna be piss between them all

Omg

Of course

Of course

MERCEDES YAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

AYYYYYYYYYY IM SO EXCITEDDDDD

ABUELITAAAA

She’s a JO crystal witch!!!!

She pulls out a gunnnn

Wowwww they found each other!!!

MERCEDES SHOOTS HIM NOOOOO

AND THEY ENDED THE EPUSODE TF

Wow that was such a good fucking episode 

HERO SHOULD GET TO KILL THEM BTW

If Willy isn’t taking girls seeiouslyyyyyyy

I don’t say it enough but On Our Way makes me want to violently sob every time I hear it

[thesherrinfordfacility]

how in the world do you do it? i sent that ask yesterday and i'm still making my way through your masterpost kind of reeling- almost every moment i paused the show (s2 especially) and thought, that's weird, but couldn't put my finger on why, you've talked about, and expanded on, and it's all so well put. you're slowly curing the countless little ⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️ bouncing around in my head. it's so satisfying, too, to see all those asks with LWA disagreeing with popular fanon. i'd been thinking it was only me.

i'm curious about your interpretation of the bullet catch, specifically aziraphale's motives. i scrolled through a few of your tags and didn't find much about it, but i might have missed something.

i've seen people say it was retaliation for the holy water request (ooc?), or some deliberate test of crowley's willingness to go through with it (and so go through with their relationship, in spite of the danger, or something). then, of course, there's the generally accepted afaik "elaborate trust fall, general aziraphalean ridiculousness" version, but convincing somebody to nearly shoot you seems like a lot (understatement), even then.

it comes across to me as a bit cruel, if that makes sense. this isn't reliant on crowley not wanting to shoot him, or just doing well under pressure. if he's never even shot a gun before, this is almost entirely luck, and i don't buy that the only thing at stake is paperwork, however much they repeat it to themselves. crowley's hands wouldn't have been shaking so badly. if he messes up, he's gonna hurt aziraphale, or have to watch his human body die. it's so fucked.

maybe it could be said that, without their miracles working, they knew they were being watched, and had to continue, but i don't buy that either. aziraphale didn't act like he felt threatened afterwards until furfur showed up- was doing the complete opposite.

that's all i've got for now, but yeah. this blog is awesome and i'm so here for your sideburn theories. have a nice day pls

oh anon✨ you're so sweet!!! i really dk about all that, i just like chatting shit and trying to spot patterns/contradictory stuff/things that don't make sense beyond the script (if that makes sense), so whilst you all might not get Smart out of me you will at least get Passionate🤌

(also YES for LWA appreciation, they deserve it 💕 - still dont know why they do it but im just happy to be involved)

ooooh okay bullet catch. couple of thoughts from me:

aziraphale was happy to go on stage and try to ameliorate the situation between crowley and mrs h (my beloved), but reticent to scope out any Showy-Offy tricks from goldstones shop

crowley hyped aziraphale up enough to go into the shop and find a new trick to perform; hes the angel who fooled nefertiti and is performing on the West End Stage, after all!!!

aziraphale is taken in by the bullet catch trick upon seeing it, but was previously happy to consider another trick. he also, presumably, wasnt aware of the element of trusting a stooge until it was told to him

aziraphale persuades crowley to perform it, even when crowley is obviously uncomfortable, and crowley isn't truthful with him re: firearms experience

crowley agreed, providing that they make use of their miracles if it goes tits up

aziraphale doesnt inform crowley on any of the plan; crowley is notably caught unawares when called out in the audience

miracles don't work, neither of them stop the performance. crowley once again still very uncomfortable, literally shaking on stage, and yet seems to calm at aziraphale ploughing on ahead.

so okay, yeah, ive basically just recited the scene - but a few conclusions:

aziraphale doesn't want to let crowley down or embarrass him by backing out of the act, or indeed by messing it up

i think there's probably some element of aziraphale doing it for himself (self-esteem), but in a way that, post-Realisation, he is showing off a bit... it strikes me that crowley wasn't fully cognizant of this little hobby of his, and aziraphale is taking a moment to do something that (bless him, he thinks) he's good at, and wow crowley as a result

i don't think the holy water request came into his motivations at all, for the same reasons you said. however, it is an appropriate mirror to the holy water request narratively; i think it will come back up in s3, and i think the bullet catch will at least emotionally inform aziraphale on whether to give crowley the water or not

as for crowley's motivations in going along with it; i think to some extent he's paying back the favour, but mainly that it's truly just to make aziraphale happy. a step beyond that; to him, aziraphale is in need of something, and that is something aziraphale is only trusting crowley to deliver. crowley of course assumes miracles will be their safety net, so agrees to be aziraphale's knight in shining armour (*cough* playing hero)

when the miracles fail, aziraphale still has trust in crowley to do it properly. crowley however is left to trust in aziraphale's trust in kind. he still wants to do this for him, but the stakes are a bit higher in that he could shoot his best friend (?) in the face and not see him again on earth for any number of years (imo, it's never, ever been about the paperwork). but aziraphale isn't backing down; is crowley about to disappoint him? of course not.

tl;dr: they're both arseholes for their respective lacks of transparency with each other, deliberately put themselves in harm's way, and it was by sheer luck that they pulled it off. but it is a huge seismic shift in how they see each other, and i don't think we've been shown/suggested the full implications of the whole thing just yet.

thank you so much for your kind words, they honestly make my day!!! hope you have a lovely day too!!!✨💕

[lesbianyosano]

what do you think bsd is trying to say about war? do you have any other thoughts about political themes present in the story?

oh i have,,, thoughts,, for sure. also these are more loose threads that have been floating around in my head more than a concrete thesis so sorry if they dont make much sense as a whole

one thing i think is crucial to discussing bsd as a political story is to look at which countries' authors asagiri choses to include in the story.

obviously the main cast is japanese, but the other prominent characters come from usa and russia, and if you also take in characters from the light novels or ones, who have been foreshadowed to be important (like agatha), france and the uk come to mind. those are all states with imperialist past/present, and while there are none morally pure countries this specific selection is still pretty intense all things considered. many of the authors included in bsd were also involved politically one way or another (most had been active during the first half of the 20th century, and wrote about war one way or another)

the imperialism isnt really touched upon, unfortunately so, but ( and maybe this is just me being hopeful) i like to think its less about asagiri not seeing it and more about him not wanting to open another sensitive topic in an already complicated work of fiction.

ultimately i'd say bsd is anti-war. that's the most prevailing political theme, and one that has been slowly revealing itself and becoming more prominent the further we go into the story. worth noting is how elements that could've (and maybe should have) been shown as explicitly political avoided this framing in earlier parts of the story (fukuzawa's old profession, kunikida's ideals), but ig there's still time for that. the anti-war sentiment ties back to a lot of the works that the abilities are named after, esp in the agency. no longer human, thou shalt not die, the makioka sisters (tanizaki's light snow) are all prime examples (and kunikida's ability could technically be put under this too depending on how you look at it, since his war journalism is what made him a prominent literary figure). even if some of the authors had some questionable opinion's irl, the parts that asagiri choses to include always come back to the horrors of war.

decay of angels is another thing, given it's named after mishima's last novel, one that he left to his publisher on the same day he started a coup trying to restore the emperor of japan and commited seppuku. there was a theory i saw a while back that said bram wasnt actually a doa member, and the 5th person is yet to be revealed, and it'd be really interesting if we got mishima in bsd but he's still to this day a pretty polarizing figure (understandably so) and im not sure if asagiri would want to take that step, since it'd be a point of no return in terms of explicit politics in the story. and he's been pretty timid with that i mean look at the way he handles police brutality (cops in yokohama being portrayed as incompetent yet ultimately good people, jouno going from prime example of someone knowingly abusing their power to apparently caring abt the innocents, and this is obv a different, more complicated topic so uhh idk maybe ill talk abt it some other time adgsfgagd). idk it just seems like he's afraid to really push the ideas forwards, keeps them palatable to the general public although idk if this is a concious choice or not. im willing to give asagiri the benefit of the doubt bc of how he handles fukuchi though. people hate him bc??? idk he's not a twink and he killed someone ig but personally i adore him, goofy aah guy imo. it'd be easy to write him off as just an autoritarian crazy guy who wants to take control of the world for unspecified "greater good" but the arguments he makes are generally pretty compelling! and not just to readers, we see atsushi questioning the way world works and government's role after listening to fukuchi explain himself. its fukuchi's methods that are questionable not the ultimate goal of state abolition. and we still dont really know what his ultimate reason for doing all this is, just that he claims it's not revenge on fukuzawa, so im curious how this is going to get handled.

and the last thing is the brief anticapitalism theme in the guild arc but again, its like asagiri gave up on it before it became too prominent. fitzgerald is the ultimate capitalist and we see this esp in relation to steinbeck, whose dislikes list finansists in the enligh translation and capitalists in the polish one (no idea what is listed in japanese exactly). but fitzgerald is ultimately sort of redemed, with his (and poe's) wealth treated as a gag rather than a human rights violation

those are all the things that have been ping ponging around in my head and i hope this is in any way at least a little bit understandable. there are some things here that deserve a post of their own but id have to reread at least the last few arcs to talk about them in depth.

[red-dyed-sarumane]

every time i think about the oumen mokushiroku & unplanned apoptosis connections i take damage but in also eating it like candy.

like. current theory with the details i have now. we know the angel was supposed to be a protection figure, either agreed on by the others or just what she saw as her personal role idk which the songs are subjective so its hard to say, & we know she wasnt able to actually do anything about the situation, proven by the fact in all the the songs the whole world ending is still ongoing. she want to help, nothing she can do has made any difference and shes out of options. so, theory, the only thing left she can even try is to give up her retries, to really sacrifice herself so everyone else can keep going & make it out of the whole cycle alive & intact. its different from the other songs excluding aru sekai shoushitsu itself since the motif is in the lyrics not the instrumental but in direct contrast to the og lyrics hers are about wanting to meet again but everythings going dark on her. like in a heavy "this is the end" for her kind of way. maybe by saying it, its her way of giving up her repeats. details are kind of hazy i guess but i hope u get what i mean.

and then u have the direct counterpoint song about the girl whos taking it in the worst way possible. honestly i dont think she was that great of a person to begin with all thing considered but dear god girl got worse on purpose. again we know the two are directly linked bc this girls sitting outside the same window the angel was at, but now its dark & broken, & im willing to bet thats to show the angel's not there anymore. the girl in unplanned apoptosis has the Worst attitude ever, i cant blame her given everything thats happening but also wow she is NOT doing well. the world's ending on repeat, shes experienced the worst how many times, and now the angel went and left her too. having an absolute dog shit time & shes letting everyone know by being a brat about it, lying acting out pretending not to care etc etc. -another detail that ties in. we know from maximizer everyone involved is aware of the risks. we know the characters know they can lose their self so theyre no longer "human" & therefore cant continue.- so whats that mean for her? well shes at the end of her rope i dont think she wanted any of this to begin with and now she's been left all alone (by the angel. the others are still there but theres no contextual reason to believe shes particularly close to any of them) so whats left for her but to do the same and make sure she doesnt repeat anymore either? the "kill myself" line isnt exactly the suicide u'd think. she's not actively ending her life itself. she self sabotaging in every other way possible, digging herself deeper, becoming the worst version of herself so she can cross that "boundary of self" as its called in laboratory so that she can finally die for the last time when the world ends again. but the problem is even with all shes doing & acting out she cant cross that boundary. she still is forced to continue. "just as usual the day ended" for her. even after everything, after permanently losing someone & all the self destruction theres no change whatsoever, thats maddening in itself yet shes still herself so she has to live with it.

which, slight tangent, makes it all the more interesting to find out what the Fuck the laboratory chara did that SHE loses her self & cant continue but the one whos potentially actively trying to do that cant. my best guess rn is that labo got caught up in the details & forgot her personal values in pursuit of an end, where as apoptosis is acting in her own interests with less care on the fate of the world & doing so means she clings to her self but i dont really have the details to back that up rn.

[vampkomori]

the TMGB theory

i think theres a bit more to Shinjukus “destruction” if we shift our attention to its most iconic landmark, the tokyo metropolitan government building. 

Note: this theory is just for fun. but I think it has a good shot at estimating the future higher plane storyline

Before we get into the details of the TMGB, lets first establish something about the purification of Shinjuku

This dialogue from w2d4 is about much detail as we’ll get about what happened to Shinjuku, and what effect its “destruction” had on the RG. It was “wiped out” “erased” and “vanished”; nobody in the RG remembers it, except for the people that had been in the UG before.

Well “how can a whole city just vanish?” the answer is: it cant. But lets first bring this visual aid into play

Shinjuku used to be just north of Shibuya, but its not gone in the sense that it left a hole in reality and people just black out whenever they pass through. No, it seems like Shinjuku as an established district is gone, meaning its borders were never drawn, and all its space was instead given to all the other districts.

Basically, instead of “vanishing”, its more like memories and history were rewritten so that Shinjuku was just never a thing. Instead, the other districts just expanded their reach and parts of formerly-Shinjuku are now parts of other cities.

I believe this has to be the case because the alternative brings more trouble than its worth: If it was truly erased to a point where the space it formerly occupied is just empty, people would notice. But as we see with rindo and the others, they dont! rindo had no idea there was even a city up there. Itd also make no sense if people just blacked out and suddenly ended up on the other side of Tokyo, itd mess with measurements bc theres just a bunch of space unaccounted for. people with a 6th sense would also have picked up on the area being iffy, but none of this seems to be the case

Now we can get to the tokyo metropolitan government building! Its pretty important considering its uh. The government. And also shinjukus most iconic landmark. If the city had actually been destroyed, then thered be severe consequences in the RG because their government building is suddenly just gone. A simple memory wipe could not make up for it not existing, and it definitely couldnt just magically conjur up a new building within moments. (I mean, whose jurisdiction would this even fall under? The other Composers would fight over whod get to have the literal government in their city)

Suffice to say “Shinjuku” still exists in the RG. Its just broken up into pieces and those are considered part of the other cities now.

So, if Shinjukus RG is fine, what about its UG?

What we see in A New Day may actually just be Shinjukus UG slowly fading into another plane. 

To backtrack a little, theres a reason the Shibuya UG we’re in during neo doesnt include its newly gained parts of shinjuku, its because Shinjukus UG also still exists, and as neku says “it’s still there, but it’s been cut off from both the RG and the UG.” so its inaccessible. Also meaning, it cant be broken up and added to the expansion of the other UGs. if someone were to, theoretically, die in the RG of the areas that were formerly part of shinjuku, theyd simply go to the UG of whichever district claimed that area, and just wouldnt be able to access that other area in that UG

Now that thats out of the way we can go back to the actual star of the show: the tokyo metropolitan government building! Needless to say, whichever district has the literal government within its borders is bound to be incredibly influential.

And it just so happens

That the TMGB now falls into Shibuyas borders!

I believe this may be the key to the future relevance of Shibuya. The city is already extremely influential, as joshua himself said

Shibuyas influence is too strong.

So strong in fact, it could potentially “poison” the other districts. Now imagine how powerful Shibuya would be if you added the Government into the mix.

Additionally, Shibuya is already considered special by the Higher Plane due to the Shibuya River.

The Shibuya River is a particularly unique place, though we dont know which exact properties make it so unique, the fact that it started flowing into its own plane even after its source was destroyed already marks it as incredibly powerful.

So Shibuya as a place is impressively influential, so itd be no surprise if the Higher Plane kept an eye out for it, but if there was any doubt about this,

Due to the events of og twewy, the city is also considered to have reached its ideal state. Without a doubt this only adds to its already impressive level of power, and basically assures that the Angels keep an eye out for the city even after the Game between Joshua and Megumi was over.

But then why were they suddenly so insistent on seeing Shibuya purified in neo? Well, we dont know. Despite mentioning purification so often and the fact that Angels seem to encourage it, we dont actually know why the Higher Plane wants to see Shibuya purified. By all means, it should be an optimal parallel world now, so why would they suddenly want to see it gone?

The key may actually be Joshua himself. After all, he intended to stop Shinjukus purification. Though we dont know why he interfered, whether it was out of a newfound appreciation for humanity that went beyond his own city, or if he actually wanted to prevent the TMGB from falling into his borders, he was actively going against what the Higher Plane wanted, which would automatically mark him as a nuisance in their plans. Surely by purifying Shibuya, its entire area and also the area it claimed from Shinjuku, would once again fall into the borders of another district, and thus another Composer. 

Its difficult to say whether this is an overarching plan from the Higher Plan that has spanned across both games. If youve read my post about Composers, which is about how Hazuki may actually be a demoted Angel from the Higher Plane, it could be possible that his demotion was on purpose, and that they intended for Haz to purify Shinjuku, therefore making Shibuya more powerful due to the TMGB falling into its borders. He would be the ideal candidate for this, as hes considered unsympathetic and lacks knowledge about the lower planes (and thus doesnt know about the TMGB), making it extremely easy to influence him to erase his city. (though you could also claim he was in on it, but then later changed his mind about it and decided to intervene with Shibuya’s destruction, once again due to Joshua’s influence)

Either way, Shibuya was saved! (again!) and now its more influential and powerful than ever. No doubt even more people would want to come after Shibuya’s seat of Composer, just to govern this massively important city. 

And who else still desires this seat other than our favourite math guy

The fact that his plotline about still wanting to go after the Composer is tucked away in the Secret Ending of Another Day, means that this still has to be followed up on in a potential next game. 

And what better scenario to bring this up than Shibuya being highly sought after due to its recently acquired influence-boost in the form of the government

and to summarize everything once more for extra clarity

Shinjuku wasnt destroyed so much as history was just overwritten so that Shinjuku as a district was never established, causing its area to be split up amongst the other districts. the TMGB now falls into the borders of Shibuya, and with it comes even more power and influence. Shibuya as a city already had an intense amount of influence over tokyo, and even the Shibuya River is so unique that it catches the attention of the Higher Plane. Despite Shibuya having reached its ideal state of being an optimal parallel world, the Higher Plane still wants to see it purified for some reason. Though we dont know why yet, it may be because of Joshua, the fact that hes Shibuyas Composer, and that he willfully goes against the Higher Plane, most notably when he interfered to prevent Shinjukus Inversion. Whether Hazuki is aware of an overarching plan or not, Joshua still influenced him to a point where he also decided to go against the Higher Plane by saving Shibuya. With Minamimoto still wanting the Composer’s seat, it sets the tone of Shibuya’s throne being more sought-after than ever. And the Higher Plane may be more relevant than ever to make sure this influential district falls into the hands of one of their own

this concludes my case

[iambecome]

Digital vs. Traditional Art, Re: Berserk

Today I went to the 30th Anniversary Berserk Exhibition in Hirakata Park. Im planning on making a longer post with some photos and some other things to talk about the exhibit as a whole (spoiler: it was awesome).

The exhibit was about 20% elaborate plastic models and replicas (which we were allowed to photograph) and 80% original manga panel drawings (which we were not allowed to photograph). Seeing the original panels in person was amazing, and also quite surprising.

The main thing that surprised me was the number of materials used. Miura is known for his beautiful, dynamic art, but it was only upon seeing it in person that the creation of these pieces went far beyond just drawing something well or creatively. Black and white ink was utilized, as well as white out and deleter sheets. He also used large, thick black pens, graphite pencil (especially when drawing Griffith, who appeared to be uninked in several final versions to give him that ethereal, angelic quality), and a number of different sizes of pen, even when drawing a single figure. His drawings werent just linework-- it was highly textured. One of the most brilliant things he did was use ink splatter-- which, in person, you can clearly see is literally just ink splattered from a pen-- in order to project an image of something being dirty or chaotic, such as in fight or battle scenes.

Its a whole ecosystem in there, is what I’m trying to say. 

This all begins to change though some time after the eclipse, right around the end of the Conviction Arc. 

Now, this is just my personal opinion but, after the Conviction Arc it always felt like the story sort of... fell off. It wasnt that it god bad, but there was just something that wasnt the same. It began to feel less like an earth shattering fantasy epic and more like... just a regular anime.

Many people attributed this to Miura growing older, his interests shifting, or studio pressure. I, however, have a different theory-- I believe it was due to the shift in digital art.

You can see in the artwork once Miura begins to do more digital rather than analog pieces that there is a certain degree of restraint which  you dont find it earlier works. Character linework becomes crisp and defined. Miura’s dynamic cross hatching is replaced with more standard shading techniques. You can see this in the manga too, but when faced with it in person the difference is incredibly striking.

ANALOG

DIGITAL

I had believed for a long time that maybe his style was just changing. He just had different interests. Then, however, I got to the end where they had an interview with him, filmed a few months before his death. 

In the interview they ask him if he prefers digital or analog art, and he has a very surprising answer. I was not allowed to record, so I cant say it in entirety, but he is very eager to descibe analog drawing as “like calligraphy”. 

As he describes his process in analog drawing, he mentions several times that it is a process that relies almost entirely on creative flow. You begin a piece with an idea, and then let the pen and page carry you to the final work. He describes how it was “extremely fun, but difficult for others” because when drawing analog, he may decide to change a scene entirely or a perspective. It was an organic process.

Digital, however, he describes as “synthesizing”-- he seems to enjoy doing digital work, but he mentions how it gives you the ability to go into very deep detail. It allows you to plan out your work, change it and mold it. It also allows you to work more closely with others, delivering a cleaner yet more studied product.

He did not state a preference. Perhaps he never had a preference.

But after watching that interview and looking at the work in the hall, I began to wonder about the story of Berserk. How it began to feel formulaic and somewhat dry. It was less dark and dreary of course, but it also just didnt seem to flow the same way that it had before. 

It is only a theory. It can only be a theory I guess, I doubt even Miura himself would know if he could say. But after seeing what I saw, I now attribute this to the shift to digital. Once the work became digital, it stopped being just an exercise in free flowing creativity, and instead became something synthesized, planned, and heavily managed. 

Earlier panels in Berserk may not look as polished. They have a chaos to them that can sometimes make it hard to follow with your eyes, and the amount of black, dark ink used fills the page to sometimes make things near unrecognizable. 

But... I dont know. I think that’s sort of a part of the whole thing. Miura was a visual story teller first and foremost. Moving to digital-- in my opinion-- removed much of that artistic agency and creative flow, and for that-- again, in my opinion-- the story (and the art) suffered.

He did, at least, still seem quite happy. I dont mind if I dont like some of the last chapters. I just hope he enjoyed making them.

[xchoco-mixturex]

SO, WHAT I GET FROM WHAT HAPPENED IN THE END OF TENKUU SHINPAN ARRIVE

Of course: FUCKING SPOILERS, IF IT ISNT GOD DAMN OBVIOUS! and yes i say it like that because i see someone saying ‘EWMYGEWDIWASSPOILE--” shut up.

shut the heck up.

I wont cross tag, this will be explicitly called Tenkuu shinpan arrive spoilers and the others ones i have. i wont even tag characters to not spoil anything at all.

now get ready....

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.SO!

Yuri faced Alien-kun, who seems to be the predecessor God of this realm. Or so it was told. It seemed to the the retaiing existence of him.

even with the facing she did, she cannot save Senya with the power she has. The only posibility is Senya returning by his own or something like that. He seems to be trapped in another area, different that the first high rise world of the survival game, and also different than the barren survival world

Yuri and co are thinking of going there it seems, Oribe says its too dangerous, but she thinks it only

Yuri learnt there is a CREATOR of all this realms. Each survival game, and each dimension of survival. Yuri says she needs to stop that person once and for all. Yuri says if that mean is defeated, maybe everyone might come back, from Senyas will, to Nanamis father, though its a possibility. (aka, also Kuon would return, my baby <3)

it seems the creator is IN A REALM CALLED AS ‘ARRIVE’. he said she found it, and what she really must do.

Oribe, seeing Yuri happy, thinks she is a little bit crazy....Also, she says when Senya goes back to normal ‘I will also....’ (ngl,if she confesses to him i would be dissapointed. That would feel forced a bit. sorry. And i like ships (?)

Yuri asks Kuon, who is with her,what about Daisei. Kuon says the battle with Daisei its almost over. Rika succeded in killing his body and Rika, Sniper, Nise,Hayami Shintaro, and Great angel colaborated in reducing the energy of the realm, so Daisei would be consumed aka killed. But he ran away with a little bit of energy

That confirms my theory that when the realm energy gets consumed, if there is a being that was born with that energy (Aka Daisei or Kuon), that entity dies since its made of energy, and the energy was consumd. That explain many people wondered why Yuuka (since Yuri being the admin, and Rika being a non-electible for god God candidate) didn’t keep going with the god trials, not only because there wasnt enough energy only, but also because the energy consumed would mean Kuon’s death.

Kuon asks Yuri if she meets Daisei she will kill him? Yuri says yes. Since Yuri before wanted to be diplomatic with Daisei, but no, fuck diplomacy.

Tenmas was listening all the new info all along, with Asuka on her back. She seems interested with the new realm, info and energy. She wants to be stronger than the original Yuri, so she taunts her saying if she reaches that place, she will finally be able to surpass her. Yuri is puzzled *Choco chuckles*

 Tenma admits she cant surpass her in strenght competition, but with ‘this new little acqueired guy’ she will, as she wants to absorbs his abilities. That ‘little guy’ is no one as Daisei as an eye/cloud. Tenma has seized him. Tenma wonders wht will happen if she has him at her side (well, mostly as kidnapped---). 

Daisei’s seems to gone crazy as he is crazily repesting the world ‘equality’ multiple times. his motto for him to be god.

Kuon sees the scene surprised. “Daisei...how pitiful...”

Yuri tells Tenma that her sin was only because of Daiseis program when he created her, and for that, she didnt pursued her. Yuri warns her if she indeed goes away and keeps going and stuff with Daisei, that means Yuri and co will take her down.

Tenma looks at her down, mockingly. Asuka raises her the middle finger

Far from there, Sniper is aiming at them with his rifle, ready to take the shot. In the end, he sighs and mutters “what a bother”, and lowers his rifle. Ttaku is pretty much the japanese “Tch” muttering.

Something that noticed later...I feel Sniper a bit odd. Maybe its just my imagination because I’m not used to see him with no mask but...

Tenma notices Sniper was threatening, her, and she mutters he is scary, so in the meantime she will ran away with her friends (dunno if she only meant Asuka, or she will take Zeon and Juo(rika) with her too)

She says one last thing, in honor to the ‘Originals’, aka they main 5 original crew:

“Thank you....and goodbye, clumsy people.”

As she said the Clumsy people phrase , we see different pannels: Rika watching the horizon, Nise with Mayu (nise’s clone) in her arms, Great Angel also watching the distance and Shintaro Hayami (Prophet) reuniting with Shika Hayami finally.

Tenma ports away. Yuri falls and laughs softly. Saying that indeed, they are clumsy people, not only her, but also her crew, that being because... (She alludes to the fact that maybe they could have done the teleportation to the OG world, but not happening because Yuris powers were unstable (special chapter) and also the fact they would sacrifice Kuon)

Yuri reassures Oribe and Nanami that with time she ‘will deliver them to the OG world, so please rest assured.’

Oribe comments that she is a bit confused since it seems the Original World is also turning to be dangerous, and also that her head hurts.

Oribe says she wont go back yet, she still have many things to do. Yuri smiles softly to her, but a bit sad.

Oribe looks at the distance and asks Yuri about that orbital elevator. She asks her about if Yuri has a way to make that elevator work somehow, of course if it doesn't bother her. Oribe says she is curious if it is truly connected to space

Oribe: “I...I actually like it a lot. The universe...”

With that last phrase, we see the last panel of Senya resting in a bed. He is resting with a smile.

SO, IT IS AN OPEN ENDING. IT SEEMS MAYBE, MAYBE WE MIGHT ALSO HAVE A CONTINUATION OF THIS, SINCE WE ARE FACED WITH THE REALM OF THE CREATOR AND A POSSIBILITY TO STOP FINALLY EVERYTHING ONCE AND FOR ALL.

Besides they need to go back. And also there is the issue if bringing Senya back, alongside with Kuon’s returning to have a physical body. and the slight possibility if the creator is defeated, maybe some things will be solved. 

(Yuri says maybe she can bring back Nanami’s dad if she faces the creator, but I’m not entirely sure because Supervisor told us before bringing people back to life was impossible, and the only exceptions being the ones with the Judges “Resurrection.” Even Senya’s state is still unknown. But ther eis a posibiity for Senya to come back.) THATS ALL, EVERYBODY! STAY TUNED IF I KNOW SOMETHING ELSE! for now i will go and write some fanfics and cope with this because holy smokes, i am curious

Also no, no ‘visual’ confirmation about the ships for the ones who likes that. Yes, we know some ships are freaking almost undeniable canon but ANYWAYS

....And I really hope i’m wrong with Sniper. It’s an interesting theme of him seeing a downfall to what has been told since day one in Tenkuu shinpan, that Gods doesn't need to feel and stuff, and Sniper already facing one of the 3 god trials. And knowing Sniper’s key-stuff of his personality is his humanity and how he clings to it so hard... It pains me.

Also he needs a freaking rest for fucks sake. Like, stop, let him be happy for once---

take care <3

[the-walnut]

Night Vale + Scientists

Alrighty, I’m relatively new to this fandom and all, so I’m not entirely sure how well this actually coincides with canon and whatnot, but I’m going to feel free to vocalize this anyway.

We all know from relatively early on in this particularly lovely podcast that Carlos the “Perfectly Imperfect” Scientist has an unrivalled passion for the unexplained. The idea of mystery drives him crazy, and he chases blindly after anything that doesn’t have a feasible answer, that can’t be understood, that seems far too beyond human comprehension to decode- a trait that, I will argue to my last dying breath, is part of why he fell head-over-kettle in love with Cecil Palmer, perhaps the most mysterious and unexplainable character in the show, and the first impossible riddle he wasn’t hell-bent on solving

Cecil, though, is the exact opposite of his counterpart. See, Cecil’s job is announcing the happenings of Night Vale, not analyzing them. When something occurs out of the ordinary, he doesn’t always need a ‘why’- in fact, in most regards, Cecil’s pretty content to just have a general grasp of what’s going on or what to expect from something and roll with the punches. Animal carcasses raining from the sky? Don’t panic, just get a stronger umbrella. The sun didn’t rise today? You know, that happens sometimes. It’ll pass!

It makes sense, in this fashion, for the fandom to naturally come to the conclusion that Cecil is terrible when it comes to science. I’ve seen a lot of posts and fanart about the worst accidents in the lab being Cecil’s doing, and while they’re amusing, I have another perspective to bring to the metaphorical table.

What we often seem to forget is that, while Carlos always seems to come to the right conclusions at the right times, and make sense of an insensible world, he’s still an Outsider. Night Vale is a curious thing to most of its occupants, let alone an individual who wasn’t born and raised there. There’s a lot of stuff about this one unique speck in the desert that even Carlos doesn’t know anything about, and I have no doubt in my mind that it would hinder him sometimes.

So instead, in the early stages of their relationship, I can imagine Cecil waking up to a call from a frustrated Carlos, going off on an absolute venting tangent from the lab at 4:37 A.M. And at first, it’s a bit of a shock to both of them because, well, from Cecil’s end it is 4:37 A.M. on a Wednesday, and he’s talking particle theory with a man who probably should’ve tried getting some sleep three days ago at the rate he’s going, but all the other members of Carlos’ team have long since gone home, and he usually finds it helpful to go step-by-step through his experiments vocally to catch any mistakes or hash out new ideas.

After at least a full forty-five minutes of Carlos rambling into the phone about how the molecular bonding of this solution shouldn’t be even remotely close to what it is, and that he can’t understand why it keeps giving off such staggeringly different temperatures with each batch he makes, Cecil (getting over his initial surprise that Carlos is calling him of all people) gently reminds him that maybe he’d best rest and think about it again with a clear head.

“Try some of that raspberry oolong Intern Stephen dropped off earlier this week,” He suggests brightly, explaining that it’s supposed to help with clarity and that the crushed beetle wings in the mixture hardly throw off the taste at all. “And remember to whisper a compliment to the water before you try to boil it- it can get fussy otherwise, you know. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve forgotten and wound up with a solid block of ice in my kettle or, worse, the kettle itself melting all over the countertop. Terrible to get out of the carpet later in that case, but as long as you’re cordial, it should boil nicely for you.”

And at first, there’s dead silence on the other end of the line, before Cecil can hear Carlos scrambling to make a note on this development, because of course he wasn’t whispering anything to the water he’d used in his experiment, and that’s probably the reason for 74% of the problems he’s come across so far.

It doesn’t take long for this to become a normal occurrence, Carlos calling in regularly with all kinds of questions and, as before, just needing to talk through something, Cecil offering advice on how to handle certain stuff, or even just talking a while about the things Carlos is working with. More often than not, this leads to some kind of revelation, because while Cecil might not understand the science behind why glass stirring rods need to be used only in a clockwise direction, he at least knows that they just do, and that’s what Carlos needs.

Eventually, this extends to the rest of the lab crew as well, because, yes, they might be Night Vale residents, but there’s a pretty large chunk of information about their town that even they are missing. With how quickly things can come up or change in their spooky little town, it can be impossible to keep track of everything on one’s own. Tentatively at first, but with growing speed, the other scientists begin asking for advice and extra help with info as well. 

Catching on to the trend, a new addition makes its way into Cecil’s radio show, where, every day, scientists can send in questions for the citizens of Night Vale, and they can respond accordingly, offering insight. If nothing else, it serves as a reminder to those listening in on the broadcast that their scientists don’t miraculously have the answers to everything, and that the downside to having the entire population of your city looking to you for those answers is sometimes not having any.

Even those who don’t have knowledge to offer find ways to help. Scientists return home, weary beyond measure from saving their friends and family from yet another disaster, only to find the lights already dimmed and welcoming, old takeout containers thrown away, and bed made. There’s a note on the table that would be eery and concerning, were it not for the sensation that there had always been a presence in their home, and, if nothing else, this only confirms one of their many hypothesises, setting another theory down to rest. Creatures (that definitely are not angels) appear in the lab every now and then, bringing with them a smiling old woman, and several Big Rico’s pizza boxes, cases of bottled water, and bundles of grapes. Nobody knows why grapes in particular. Maybe the not-angels have an affinity for them. Either way, the mandatory snack break is welcomed by many. Secret police mutter helpful tips from bushes under open windows, and, despite books being banned, once in a blue moon a torn-out page from some volume makes it’s way onto a given scientist’s lab table, curating many more questions, and causing many to reevaluate their perceptions of the harrowing librarians, the hooded figures who show no fear of them, and the public library itself.

Night Vale is a place of mystery and intrigue and danger- but it is also a place of people bonded by experience and survival. It’s a place called “home” by many, even if they do not necessarily understand it, and these are the people who save this city by supporting discovery in their own little ways. Night Vale loves its scientists, and it will do what it can to help them understand it even a little bit more.

[dru-and-ash]

300 Days of Ash

Day 3: Ash’s Flower Card Theory

Can be considered a part 2 for this theory/ Okay that one is old like february-march 2019 old but it has some strong points 

United Fearie Courts Theory

What does Apple means on Flower language and Biblical myths?

The apple became a symbol for knowledge, immortality, temptation, the fall of man and sin.Aside from being a religious symbol, the apple is also an ancient fertility symbol. It represents love, temptation, and spiritual growth. To eat the apple means acquiring knowledge 

What can this mean for Ash?

I don’t think the fertility part applies to Ash but love, temptation and spiritual growth will be at the table on his long and complicated journey from anti-hero to hero coz

1)  Temptation: He’s tempted to take the world in which way we don’t know yet but definately agrees with his dear uncle Janus for now

2)But he’s also curious even longing to see our world and get to know how things work there coz boy only lived in faerie where King and Queen desides everything and Thule where father desides everything

So first step is acquiring knowledge about democracy or a basic world concept where it’s people *at least some of it’s people* desides for themselves

3) The fall of man and sin:  Nobody is sinless folks so Ash is likely to cause some harm to some people knowingly or unknownst crimes commited on his name *eyes on Janus at this point* Ash is going to face the consequences of these sins and it’s going to hurt him mentally

But one can learn from their mistakes with the help of

4) Love: I truly dont care if this love philia coming from Clary who’s practically a cinnamon roll and cryed over hearing about Ash’s story in Thule or eros coming from Dru, Jaime or anyone with a possible good impact on him. Yes Janus you dont count as good impact so you dont belong to this category your agape/mania is toxic

5) So Ash after eating the fruit of knowledge of good and evil metaphorically will go through a rough journey meeting and making allies and friends with our trio at some point will achieve spiritual growth.

As for immortality I believe it’s on the table for Ash the same was it was for Meliorn due to time running differently in faerieland and having lived with faeries *assuming he does at the end of TWP* and faerie parent’s magical power makes the half-faerie child more powerful(Queen being one hell of a magical being enough to hold the throne+extra power royal blood gives) let alone Ash’s other half wasnt mundene like Meliorn’s Sebastian was Lilith’s precious son which Ash inherited his immunity aganist angelic magic *only in theory for now*

And I didn’t even take the perfect loyalty spells into account to say these. Because he after living almost a year in Seelie with Janus still looked 16 so he isn’t even aging relative faerie immortality is real for Ash.

About Meliorn’s extemely long life

[sadprose-auroras]

‘About Time’ - Roger TaylorxFem!Reader (Part 1)

A/N: Hello my darlings! I can’t decide if I hate this or not, and I’m not sure if I’ll continue writing this, depends on the response. Please let me know if you want me to continue it (it would probably require way more parts, like a full on series). Hope you enjoy! - Also, this can apply to Ben Hardy’s portrayal of Roger. Whatever you prefer!

(This was totally inspired by a couple time travel fics I read a few weeks ago, I can’t remember the authors or the names but all credits to them for the time travel idea…. LOVE. IT. I just HAD to write my own, crappier version)

Find my other works here!

 You sunk to the floor, your knees giving out beneath you. You felt ridiculous, curling up in a ball, in your wardrobe, but you had reached your breaking point; everything had suddenly hit you. As you hugged your knees, sobbing, your jeans became tear-soaked. Your mind wandered, as your cheeks flamed in embarrassment and shame about your current state, despite nobody being around. How did you get here? A few months ago, your life was great. You had a great job, a great circle of friends and boyfriend, and you were pursuing your passion; studying fashion design. Then, everything began to crumble around you. All your friends turned on you, you got fired, and your studies began to slip as a result, causing you to fail an exam.  

 If all that wasn’t bad enough, you found out your boyfriend of two years had been cheating on you for a year and 11 months. Go figure. It was as if the universe was playing some long, cruel joke on you, just to see how long before you gave up on trying to pursue any kind of happiness. Just as you came to the conclusion that you really had nothing to fight for, leaning your head back on the wall behind you and closing your eyes, the strangest feeling overcame you. Your head began to spin, and pins and needles covered your entire body. You tried to open your eyes, to move your body, but you were frozen. Your heart rate increased rapidly, and you began to think that this was really it. Whatever was happening, you were going to die. Strangely enough, you couldn’t find it in yourself to care.  

 By some miracle, everything stopped. The pins and needles ceased, and, save a throbbing headache, you felt much better. You experimentally wiggled your toes, and you had feeling back again. Hesitantly, you opened your eyes, looking around you. It was dark, but you could make out the shapes of the clothes hanging around you. Oddly, you didn’t recognise any of them. The chair that was next to you when you closed your eyes was gone, replaced by a shoe rack.  

You stood up, closed your eyes again and rubbed your temples, trying to rid of the probable hallucinations. You racked your brain, thinking back to when you studied psychosis in high school. You couldn’t remember a thing. Was temporary paralysis a symptom? 

 You decided you needed to call a doctor. You pulled your iPhone out of your pocket, still in the dark, and opened up safari. You had no wifi, and no reception. Frowning, you opened the wardrobe door, the knob feeling unfamiliar, to be greeted by a figure doing the same. The door swung open suddenly, bouncing on its hinges.

 You both screamed loudly, and, without looking at the figure in front of you, you tried to push past to get away, however, a hand gripped you and pulled you back. 

 Your eyes became fixed on the man in front of you. You frowned, unable to tear your eyes off him. The hallucinations were getting worse; you were conjuring up images of people in your home. Hang on. You knew his face all too well; you had spent hours watching him drum and sing at concerts on YouTube. It couldn’t be, could it?

 “Who are you, and what the hell are you doing in my wardrobe!?” he asked, releasing his grip on you. You winced, rubbing where his fingernails had dug into you. This was all too much.

 “I should be asking you the same thing, why are you in my house? What’s going on?” you looked around the room, expecting to see your familiar bedroom; your posters plastered around the walls, your colourful duvet, and your plush white carpet. Instead, the walls were empty, the duvet was blue, and the carpet was grey.

 “I need to sit down,” you said, overwhelmed, perching on the edge of the unfamiliar bed. You glanced up at the man in front of you, his expression still shocked and wide-eyed, as he looked you up and down, his brows furrowing. 

 “God, you seem so real,” you laughed. “But there’s no way.”“What the fuck do you mean?” he replied. “I know I’m real, but I can’t say the same about you. I’ve never known anyone who can just appear out of thin air,” he shook his head in disbelief. 

 You frowned, rubbing your hands through your hair. “What do you mean, I appeared out of thin air?” your stomach began to sink. For reasons you couldn’t explain, something else was going on. Something much weirder than you initially thought.

 “Well, I don’t see how you could have got into my wardrobe without me seeing. I’ve been in my room for 20 minutes.” You glanced at his legs, frowning. What kind of person wears flared jeans anymore? 

 “I, um,” you began, a laugh escaping your lips despite yourself. This was all too ridiculous. You were actively avoiding eye contact with him. You figured if you acknowledged that it was him, at that age, in front of you, this would all go away. It was impossible. Suddenly, it all came together, as shocking as it was. It wasn’t him that was in the wrong place, it was you. This wasn’t your house. You had no wifi or reception. And, Roger Taylor, looking as he did circa 1972, was right in front of you. Had you time travelled? Your head span at the possibility. What else could explain these strange occurrences? 

 “What year is it?” you asked, this time properly meeting his eyes this time. Photos didn’t do the real thing justice; his baby blue eyes were maintaining steady eye contact with you, his lips were slightly parted, and his hair looked so soft and angelic. He was insanely beautiful. You internally cursed yourself. Now was definitely not the time.  

“1972…” he said, becoming even more confused. Your theory was confirmed. You’d watched all of the Back to the Future movies countless times, but you’d never imagined anything like that could ever really happen. Especially to you; plain, boring, old you. 

 “I know you’re probably not inclined to believe the crazy girl from your wardrobe, but I think,” you bit your lip, concerned at how he would take the news. “I think I’m from the future.” 

----------

 “So, you’re telling me you didn’t do anything for this to actually happen?” Roger asked. After trying to explain to him a million times, that yes, you were in fact just as confused as him, and no, you didn’t climb through his window, you tried to remain patient. He had every right to be confused as hell, you would definitely react the same if you were in his shoes. Despite this though, he was oddly trusting, allowing you to remain in his house and actually giving you the time of day to explain your side of the story. He even offered you a glass of water and something to eat, which you accepted gratefully. You were starving. 

 “Yes, I was literally just in my wardrobe, then the next thing I knew we were screaming in each other’s faces.” 

 “How do I know you’re telling the truth? You don’t seem very sane so far. I’m going to need some proof. You could just be a crazy girl who will do anything to sleep with me,” he smirked. You rolled your eyes. So the stories were true, he really was cocky.

 “Don’t flatter yourself, Taylor,” you retorted. “And no,” you said quickly, as he opened his mouth to speak, “I don’t know your surname because I’m a crazy stalker.” Your mind wandered to your extensive Queen record and CD collection. Okay, so maybe you were a little, but he didn’t need to know that. 

 “I know because Queen makes it big. I mean, massive.” You bit your lip nervously. If Back to the Future taught you anything, nobody should know too much about their own future. For the first time in your life, you had to think about what you said before you said it.

“How can I convince you?” you asked.

“I don’t know,” he sighed. “What year do you claim to come from, anyway?”

“2019,” you bit your lip. 

His eyes widened in disbelief. “Shit,” he mumbled. “Am I….?”

 “Still alive? Yeah.” Suddenly, you had an idea. You pulled your phone out of your pocket, thankful it was still charged. You turned it on, the time and date you had left still displayed on the screen (18th January 2019, 11:00), in front of a picture of Queen from 1975. You turned the screen towards him. 

 “Holy shit, is that me?” he gasped, leaning forward. “2019.” He looked up at you, and you shrugged and nodded. You were thankful he didn’t know the implications of having a picture of somebody as your lockscreen. 

 “There’s something else,” you unlocked your phone, opening music and searching for ‘Doing Alright.’ You pressed play, the song pouring out of the speakers.

Yesterday, my life was in ruin

Now today, I know what I’m doing… 

“Oh my god, that’s our song! We haven’t even released it yet.” He chuckled. You couldn’t help but grin at his excitement, encapsulated by his gorgeous smile. 

 “Wanna hear more?” you smirked. It’s funny, you had never felt so comfortable around somebody so quickly. You couldn’t quite put your finger on it, but something about him relaxed you. 

----------

 “Have you noticed I haven’t asked about that thing you’re holding, ‘cause I’m too scared to?”

 You laughed, covering your mouth with your hand. You’d spent the last half an hour playing Roger a few more Queen songs. A small nagging voice in the back of your mind was telling you to stop, to not reveal anything about his future, no matter how small. But Roger’s pleading to hear more won.

 “It’s actually a phone,” you said, to answer his question. “Well, that’s its main purpose anyway. You can use it to take and store pictures, play music, and use the internet. Which, well, you’ll find out about in approximately 18 years.”

 “I’m intrigued, what’s the internet?” he asked. You thought of all the unspeakable things you had come across on social media, and shook your head.“You don’t want to know.” He raised an eyebrow at you, and you tried to suppress a blush.  

You cleared your throat, averting your eyes from him as you straightened up in your seat. “What’s the time?” you asked. He glanced down at his watch. “3am,” he laughed in disbelief. “We should probably get some sleep. I’ll sleep on the couch.” 

 You shook your head rapidly, taken aback by his utter kindness. “Oh my god no, please, I will. It’s your house,” you said, getting up from the chair you were sitting on. He did the same. You both stood awkwardly, basically staring at each other. You couldn’t help but think of the times you watched a Queen documentary on TV, with the Roger of your time’s commentary. It was hard to believe the man in front of you was the same person.  

 He cleared his throat, tearing his eyes off you, and going into his bedroom, mumbling something about getting something for you to sleep in.  

 As you awaited his return, you couldn’t help but wonder why you were so focused on how flustered you were around Roger, and not worried about the fact that you were literally stuck in the wrong year, and had no idea how to get back. The funny thing was, you had no desire to. You hadn’t felt so at home in a long time, than when you were laughing and talking with Roger. He made you feel so safe, so quickly. And that feeling would only grow stronger when you both gave up on convincing the other to sleep on the couch, and ended up sharing his bed. 

PART 2: BONUS CONTENT THAT I WROTE THE SAME DAY AS PART ONE. I’M NOT GOING TO CONTINUE IT BUT WHAT’S THE POINT OF HAVING IT IN A WORD DOC N NOT POSTING IT?

When I was writing this, I couldn’t stop imagining rom-com moments. Like, the outfit section? A cute montage with a cute song. Damn I wish I could express the images in my head more clearly, in words. My writing sucks. 

“Y/N, wake up. Y/N!!” A familiar, yet foreign, voice startled you. As you came to your senses, you realised your usual soft, silky sheets were replaced with cotton ones, and an unusual smell wafted around you. You slowly opened your eyes, to be greeted by Roger leaning over you, a slightly annoyed look on his face. Fuck. It was real. He must’ve read your disappointment on your face, and he smiled sympathetically and nodded.

“Yep, you’re still here,” he mumbled. You couldn’t help but sigh; you’d hoped it was a really long, unusual dream.

“I have to go to rehearsal for a gig tonight. Do you wanna come?” Of course you didn’t want to pass up the opportunity to meet the rest of the band, and literally see the magic happen, you couldn’t help but feel like you were invading. But then again, who could say they had the chance to sit in on an early Queen rehearsal, especially knowing how successful and impactful they were going to become?

“I don’t – I don’t want to intrude,” you mumbled, sitting up in the bed and clutching the duvet around you, suddenly feeling exposed in Roger’s white shirt.

“Well it’s your choice, I understand that you probably don’t want to sit around with us when you could be finding a way back home or finding your parents or something,” he said.

Although you would never admit it, you wanted nothing more than to go with him. Not only was it literally history in the making, but the absence of your birth parents in your life, leading to a childhood of foster families who couldn’t care less about you, gave you a sense of independence at a young age. You knew how to be alone, seeking solace in music. Music created by the greats like Queen made you feel less alone, as silly as it sounded. It was your escape from the struggles in your real life.

“Wait, no. I want to come. If you don’t mind. But I need something 70s appropriate to wear,” you chuckled, glancing over at your high-waisted skinny jeans and cropped knit jumper folded neatly on a chair.

“I think that can be arranged.” Roger grinned at you, and you were struck with yet another wave of disbelief. Roger Taylor was going to lend you come of his iconic clothes.

After spending a couple of hours going through Roger’s clothes, which was your absolute dream, you finally settled on a pair of pants that were a little too short, and a shirt that was slightly too tight across the chest. You tried to spice up the outfit with a few of Roger’s necklaces, much to his dismay.

“Do I look okay?” you asked when you stepped out, twirling around with your arms out.

Roger, standing with a pile of clothes in his arms that you had rejected, furrowed his brows and looked you up and down. You couldn’t help but stifle a giggle at the sight; he was taking his job as your stylist very seriously.

“You’ll almost fit in,” he said, “although, the shirt is too tight,” he finished bluntly, gesturing to your chest. You folded your arms instinctively.

“Don’t worry, I won’t look at your boobs.” You frowned at this. Was that meant to make you feel better? Why did you feel slightly disappointed?

“Um, thanks?” you scoffed. “What should I do with my hair?” you tugged on each of your French braids. Roger walked towards you without warning, and pulled out your hair ties, running his fingers through your hair.

“Just leave it loose.” He said hoarsely, his face dangerously close to yours. Your heart was beating rapidly, and you couldn’t take your eyes off him. He was biting his lip in concentration, his eyes squinting as he adjusted your hair. It took everything in you to not lean into his touch; his fingers were so delicate. As he pushed a strand of hair out of your face, his eyes met yours.

“Perfect,” he almost whispered, his breath sending shivers down your spine. You knew you should pull away. You knew this would get way too complicated. Your rationality was telling you to snap out of it. But as his hands smoothly came to rest around your neck, bringing you closer, something else entirely was driving your actions.  Just as you began to lean in, he pulled away, clearing his throat loudly.

“Let me get you a coat,” he said, quickly rushing away from you. You bit your lip, cheeks flaming. You were humiliated. What were you thinking, trying to kiss him? He obviously wasn’t attracted to you; the weird, pathetic crazy time-traveller. You didn’t even belong here anyway, how could you possibly think he would want you? Your eyes began to well up, you just had to get out of there.

As you quickly began to gather your clothes and phone, furiously wiping the tears from your eyes, Roger returned with a fur coat in his arms.

“Here, this should fit – wait, what’s wrong?” he asked, realising your state.

“I’m just gonna go. I’m so sorry to have invaded your life like this, you shouldn’t have to deal with my weird ass problems. Thank you for everything. It was nice meeting you, I guess. I’ll never forget you,” you rambled, becoming increasingly embarrassed, trying to walk past him. He gently placed his hands on your upper arms, turning you to face him.

“Hey, hey, I don’t have to help you, okay? I want to. If you’ll let me.” he said, a surprisingly vulnerable look on his face.

“But, I’m burdening you too much! You can’t have me holding you back from living your normal life. You don’t want me clinging to your side like some kind of….” You paused, struggling to find the right words in your frazzled state. “Some kind of leech. I mean, I’m just annoying. For God’s sake, we have nothing in common! I’m technically young enough to be your daughter!”

Roger laughed softly. “Okay, first of all, you’re not a leech. And yes, it’s weird that you’re from the future, and I’ll probably never wrap my head around it, but so what? We shouldn’t get along, but we do.” You hoped he couldn’t notice your blush at this.

“And, lastly,” he said, a cheeky smirk on his face, “the thought of you being my daughter is gross, but me being your daddy on the other hand…”

“Oh my god, Roger! No!” you couldn’t help but laugh, as you rapidly shook your head. You couldn’t tell if he was joking or not; you secretly hoped he wasn’t.

“So, do you still wanna come to rehearsal?” he asked, all joking aside.

You sighed, hoping you weren’t being a burden. “Okay, give me that then,” you grabbed the coat off him, pulling it on.

“Do I look normal?” you asked.

“No,” he smirked, and you raised your eyebrows at him. “In a good way, though. Come on,” he said, grabbing your hand. You tried to ignore the jolts of electricity you felt from this sweet gesture. You never thought simply holding hands with someone would give you so many butterflies.

[mittensmorgul]

So @shixpe and I have been chatting for like the last hour... (edited a bit so that it makes sense...)

but back to 13.03, i found Sam's expression to Dean's outburst about Cas very telling not just in a "feel bad" way but more that he knows or is realizing how Dean is actually taking the loss of Cas

mittensmorgul we can certainly hope\ Sam has Just Not Got It yet up to this point, I mean

shixpe we go striaght from talking about Sam's past and comparing him to Jack etc to how Dean cant get over losing Cas because of Jack.

mittensmorgul Yep. Sam had been thinking of Jack in terms of HIMSELF (and his whole demon blood arc), and not getting why Dean couldn't feel that way about him too... but Dean's been seeing Jack in terms of AZAZEL (the yellow-eyed demon responsible for murdering his loved one) I mean... Sam wasn't gonna adopt Azazel back in early seasons and just ~forgive him~ for both Jess's death and Mary's death, and try to see how he deserved to be saved... Yet that's what he's expecting Dean to do now... (obviously Jack is not equivalent to azazel and he's a nougaty bab who needs support and training, but his POWER had the same result regardless of his intent) And Dean WILL come to see that, but in order for Sam to understand, that's literally the framing the show gave to Jack's yellow-eyed powers here...

shixpe but also even though Azazel killed mary and (more relevant) Jess, Sam blamed himself.  Dean told him it wasnt his fault, but he will blame Jack for Cas' death

mittensmorgul yep

shixpe because emotions

mittensmorgul Sam blamed himself because he never told the truth to Jess, never warned her about his dreams, never told her ANYTHING.

shixpe even though that would obviously have done nothing tbh except maybe she'd have left him

mittensmorgul And now Dean's blaming himself for not being able to get through to Cas, for not doing ~something~ to stop him...

shixpe if she stayed, Azazel would get her

mittensmorgul Heck, even if she LEFT he might've still gone after her, because she had to die for Sam's Man Pain.

shixpe i have a thought that Dean is using Jack to not blame himself

mittensmorgul yep Jack is convenient.

shixpe i always assumed Azazel killed her to make Sam hunt again.  but yeah i guess he woulda still stayed at school jacks the scapegoat i feel like thats important somehow Lucifer is the biggest scapegoat of all time "The devil made me do it"

mittensmorgul But also, he's not wrong... Jack's power ~did something~ to Cas, showed him a vision convincing enough for Cas to believe in it, to make him abandon his family he'd been willing to sacrifice everything for, to abandon everything he'd believed about nephilim in general and Lucifer's offspring in particular, to make sure that power was able to be born... But yes, Jess was killed to get Sam out of the civilian life and prompt him to seek revenge again... Brady said so in s5

shixpe i have my own theory still about what happened between Cas and Jack

mittensmorgul yeah ?

shixpe made me even more sure about it when Asmo blatantly asked Sam if Jack had Bonded with Luci i think the touchy yellow eyes thing with Cas in 12.19 was that bond

mittensmorgul You think he's legit formed some sort of "duckling bond" on Cas I think so too AGAINST CASTIEL'S WILL

shixpe yeah i think it did, in a way but not consciously (just like Jacks powers), control Cas

mittensmorgul And I think that bond is gonna be a sort of tug-of-war with Dean and Cas's "more profound bond" YEah, that's exactly what I've been saying since 12.19

shixpe it made Cas see Jack as his fucking responsibility to protect and raise like his own fuckin child yeah it became more evident to me in the finale because its the only real explanation i accept for why Cas ran back into that portal, the bond made him go after what he saw was a threat to Jack

mittensmorgul It's not intentional. Jack Nougat Winchester didn't force Cas to be his father... the "power that acts without his consent or control" which Jack doesn't even feel is truly "part of himself" and acts wildly and erratically in moments of extreme fear and self-defense... THAT is what formed the bond. YES. EXACTLY. THANK YOU

shixpe also its another forced bond (maybe you could kinda relate it to the bond between parent and child, its quite often there whether you want it or not)

mittensmorgul After 12.19, Cas became a sort of "extension" of Jack's power, but a part of that power with the wisdom and strength of an ancient angel...

shixpe i think its rare for a parent to not be willing to sacrifice themselves for their child which happened twice blatantly in the finale it was so goddamn obvious

mittensmorgul who had no ability to override that power YEP

shixpe yeah

[...]

shixpe but dont forget also the moment Cas went after Luci was when Jack was being born and Kelly died

mittensmorgul yep

shixpe oh and i forgot to add to the forced bond thing its similar to Amara's forced bond but now its with CAS like SERIOUSLY

shixpe Amara/Dean was compared to sibling bonds, at the end of s11 "You're our brother Cas", now its a parent/child bond

mittensmorgul YEP.

Note: Before this whole chunk of conversation, we’d been discussing how Sam’s approach to “training Jack’s powers” was similar both to John’s “marine corps discipline” approach to raising Sam and Dean “like soldiers.” It’s literally how Sam described their upbringing in the pilot episode. And he seems to have the whole drill sergeant thing down in how he’s approaching Jack’s powers.

The other noteworthy parallel we talked about was between how Sam was “spying” on Jack while reading a child psychology and parenting book-- just like Crowley was doing back in s11 with young Amara. Which loops right back around to Jack being used as a mirror/parallel to Amara in practically every respect.

As to playing Cas’s “bond” with Jack against his long-standing “more profound bond” with Dean... that element of compulsion had never been an aspect of Dean’s bond with Cas. The bond may have been forged with the intent of “marking Dean” for service to Heaven in his role as the Righteous Man in the Apocalypse, but even after he rejected that role, he continued to forge his bond with Cas BY THEIR OWN CHOICES. And that makes all the difference here, and I believe will be KEY to not only Jack’s eventual downfall and salvation, but the key to Jack’s eventual understanding or free will and humanity.

The ENTIRE POINT of this storyline is moot if Jack and Cas were complicit in consciously choosing this bond in the first place.

Okay, as you were. :P

[tumblunni]

also MANNNN i hope they add some sort of inhuman or at least monsterously human race to this game someday it was so infinately dissappointing when they just added Elves 2: With Some Token Dragon Traits And Less Equal Fanservice

and seriously it makes NO SENSE cos like.. they make entirely separate models for all the races anyway??? even when you have the same height settings everyone still has mildly different (but 90% equally skinny) body builds depending on race (unless you pick a girl, where its just pose instead). Like yo it wouldnt be more effort to make a more different class, when you already put unnecessary effort into your sames! And all the outfits in the game all have mildly different designs for each race, even the ones that have the same body build have different like.. aesthetics? And I mean we have two races that’re a really big difference, even if its also The Laziest One of making Big Human and Smol Human. I still love the lalafell the most tho cos they have actually different faces and a bunch of cute animations and like.. for once the lil kid species isnt sexualized. They’re a very nice design, even if they’re still just Person With One Trait Changed, lol! theyre at least drawn in their own unique art style.

But MANNN wouldnt it be cool if we could have Qus or Namingways or Bangaa or Yukes or any of the popular or unpopular classic strange fantasy peoples of games past? I mean the Yukes are even kinda designed precisely for MMOing! half of their games had them available as a semi-customizeable mute protag, and even the npc ones got to show loads of variety of helmets/wings/horns and even worldbuilding on why tf they always keep their face covered in the first place. (I prefer the ‘actually haunted suits of armour’ interpretation, personally!) And I mean it was kinda nonsensical that male ones have bat style wings and females have angel style ones, its weird how that’s actually a thing I’ve seen multiple times in different MMOs when its so.. nonsense?? But at least its a form of gender dimorphism idea that’s actually something unique to a fantasy world, instead of just ‘yknow human gender talls? they have that but More.’ female bodybuilders physically do not exist biologically, and also we chop their legs off if they grow above five foot! tho srsly tho i can at least understand the theory behind ‘All Women Are Born Supermodels And All Men Are Born Goku’, like that’s actually related to stereotypical beauty standards. but why also specifically he has to be twice her height? ‘hey yknow what turns me on- the negligable barely noticeable height difference in males’. what if like one foot was like ten foot, wouldnt that be somehow more manly i suppose. Must Exaggerate All The Gends, No Matter How Pointless!

...also srsly it weirds me out that people picking on short men and tall women has somehow become more of a thing since i was a kid. like it was friggin playground bullying and now we’re getting ‘dont marry a husband shorter than you, it will somehow Foretend Doom’ in fashion mags?? tho i still roll my eyes a lot at those PUA/men going their own way/involuntarily celibate/whatever the word is now rape culture guys being all ‘i was bullied for being short once by another man, this totally means that society is unfairly female dominated and also the only reason women dont want me is because my height/cheekbones/eye width matrix/star wars fandom rather than because I Was Being A Jerk’ srsly so often it isnt even a story of women being jerks that motivates them?? ‘a woman cashier smiled politely yet this wasnt a magic signal she wanted to bone me’, ‘i held a door open for a woman and she.. walked through it!! instead of congratulating me, dropping all her busy work for the day, and dating me right there!’ ‘a man said i was gay once so somehow the gays and women are bad’ ...wow how did this post go so offtopic lol. O guess just maybe my brain was all ‘what are some bad players u met in mmos once’ and then ‘o yeah’. But lol ain’t like square enix can do much to fix that, there arent very many games with a good anti-harassment enforcement policy nowadays since the userbase has gotten so big and unweildy..

[julystorms]

i remember you saying erwin wasnt real guilty about the deaths of his comrades so i thought you might find his character monologue relevant as most of what he talks about is him feeling guitly and him naming the comrades who have lost their lifes

Thanks! 

YMMV ETC AND SO ON: THIS IS MY INTERPRETATION OF ERWIN’S CHARACTER PLEASE READ AT YOUR OWN RISK.

I wouldn’t say he doesn’t feel guilty at all, or even that he doesn’t feel guilt on a general level because he basically tells us this himself:

But IMO what we’re meant to see in this scene is that his guilt comes second to his goals. Always. The focal point of the conversation isn’t: “Wow I feel shitty about what’s happened to these people who I’ve sent to their deaths” so much as, “HOLY SHIT WE ARE SO CLOSE TO THE TRUTH man I hope I can pay back my debt later.”

This gets a tad long so please read under the cut.

First, I want everyone to look at the definition:

I highlighted the two that mattered here, but a feeling of guilt is feeling responsible for a specified wrongdoing; in this case, that is sending people to their deaths.

Erwin definitely feels badly about what he’s done; there’s a lot in the canon that would point to that statement. For example, the above panels. See also: shortly before his death, the corpse pile and ghostly images surrounding him. He feels personally responsible for those people’s deaths.

What the diehard Erwin stans tend to forget about (selectively, I might add) is that the guilt Erwin feels doesn’t exist in a vacuum. Context is incredibly important to understanding his character.

In the end Erwin admits he wouldn’t have done anything differently. Even here, in the above scene, Levi is horrified to see that Erwin’s reaction to this revelation isn’t fear or horror or even some form of self-loathing--not just for sending people to their deaths, but for sending people to their deaths to fight against and kill other people. We might simply see this as war, but these characters have no real concept of war considering how their world is arranged for them. Anyway, rather than showing some kind of negative emotion at this reveal, Erwin gives us a slasher smile. He’s so close to his goal of learning the truth. This is a huge step toward that goal. His smile makes sense to us, the reader, because we later learn what his goal is and what has pushed him toward it. Levi doesn’t know. Erwin’s reaction is completely out of the blue; it’s kind of disgusting in context. 

Erwin is now a step closer to the truth. But that knowledge, and further knowledge...was acquired at a steep price.

And he knows that it will continue to come at the price of hundreds more lives. That is a price he’s willing to pay. Other people’s lives are a price he is willing to pay. And I’m not saying this from a narrative standpoint: this is something he says and feels himself. His goals are ALWAYS #1 to him. Even to the detriment of others and the loss of human life.

There’s no remorse, no regret. Look at him talking about paying the debt back in the afterlife, like these soldiers and his pals who died for him did him a solid by giving up their lives--like they borrowed his car hauler or shoveled snow off his sidewalk once instead of giving their lives for a cause they believed in--one that wasn’t exactly the cause Erwin is passionate about/fighting for.

Now, don’t get me wrong. I think Erwin is much more complex than that. I think he’s a great character, probably one of the best Isayama has given us. Think about his history, about how his goals--both to prove his father’s theory and to prove that he didn’t get him killed for nothing--consumed him, led him to do what he did to his father, almost, but this time purposefully, knowingly, to other people--people he was in a position of power over.

I don’t think Erwin is an irredeemable asshole. I don’t think he’s a villain. But I do think he’s manipulative and lacks empathy. He had to become that way, though. He had to, if he was ever going to learn anything. That was worth it to him. He wouldn’t do it differently. That doesn’t make him a selfless li’l angel saint of a man. It just makes him interesting. 

Look: Erwin is a tragic character, but it’s not because of his guilt, not because he manipulated people into joining a cause that isn’t entirely the one they believed they were fighting for. Erwin’s place as a tragic character has nothing to do with his death, nothing to do with the serumbowl, nothing to do with losing his arm or his fighting spirit or casting aside some of his humanity. 

Erwin is ambitious to an extreme degree.

And what makes him tragic is that he didn’t get that way all on his own. There was a catalyst. That catalyst was a mistake, made not by just Erwin, but by his father as well. The tragedy is that if Mr. Smith hadn’t told his son what he thought, if he’d just lied to him, if he’d tamped down the curiosity Erwin displayed about understanding the truth behind the discrepancies in the history books, Erwin might have ended up a very different person.

The tragedy is that one man sitting down to tell his son the truth as he suspected it to be changed the course of a lot of people’s lives. Some for better, some for worse. It’s hard to imagine the kind of person Erwin would have been if his father hadn’t died because of him. It really makes you think.

(I do think he’d have still been ambitious and motivated but I think in many ways he makes a decent parallel to Grisha who fandom views as a much worse person despite the two of them being scarily similar.)

But like I said, his guilt is guilt without remorse. He admits to his guilt, to feeling badly, but he’s saying that with every intention of continuing on with it. No regrets. It was worth it to him. Which some people hate because they think it makes him a giant asshole, but I think makes him interesting as a character. He’s a guy whose goals just happen to line up with the plot of the story (not the characters, at least not at first). He’s sacrificing lives for his own goals but those goals aren’t too far removed from what we as readers want to know about the world these characters live in; that makes it forgivable for a lot of readers. But think about the characters who don’t have that goal, about the people who exist in the world who are fighting for humanity’s sake who don’t realize what Erwin is up to, who just want to fight for what they already have instead of something more. Man, it’s deliciously complex and terrible and I LOVE IT. We rarely get characters like Erwin--characters who are “good guys” literally ONLY by virtue of their selfish goals aligning in part with that of the main characters/readers. 

I don’t want anyone to think I hate Erwin. I find him a fascinating character. He’s complex in the best of ways. I don’t see him as a selfless saint, as a virtuous man, as especially considerate or caring of other people. I see him as an ambitious and motivated man who will accomplish his goals by any means necessary, even if those means get other people killed--even if deep down he doesn’t like what those means have to be.

And the best part about Erwin’s character is that his goals were selfish because he couldn’t possibly have known the extent of what we, the readers, now know about the world he lived in. Levi’s comment in the above scene about the cost not being worth it... I mean, Levi’s right, but what we know now is that the fight was going to come to Paradis eventually, anyway, and if humanity had continued to cover in the walls as Levi wanted to do, they’d be completely boned. So Erwin sacrificed a lot of lives selfishly, never knowing if doing so would amount to anything, never knowing if people were dying for fuck-all...

But in the end perhaps it wasn’t all for nothing--even Erwin himself died so that the truth was discovered.

See, people want to say Erwin was selfless in the end by giving up his dream, but really I feel his dream was that the truth BE DISCOVERED and yeah, it would have been nice to see it for himself, to discover it for himself personally, but that wasn’t the goal. The goal was that everyone would know it. And in leading that charge he tried to ensure that at least a few people would learn it and share it--and expose the lies and bullshit that he probably didn’t understand fully but knew had to be going on/hoped would be uncovered. ‘Cause seeing the goal for himself wouldn’t mean a goddamn thing if he couldn’t return to his people to share it. In dying, other people would have a higher chance of being able to take it back. 

So that catalyst led a hell of a lot of people to their deaths--including Erwin himself. It’s interesting to think about. This is why Erwin in an AU never ever feels quite right to me. He’s ambitious as hell but there needs to be a catalyst of some kind to make him as ruthless and remorseless as he is in the canon; his situation made him that way. Take it away and he’s just an ambitious businessman or something doing hardcore negotiations. 

Anyway, the TL;DR here is: Erwin feels guilty; I would never dispute that. But he lacks remorse because he’s incapable of regretting what he’s done. I guess you could choose to hate him over that, but honestly it’s rare that we get interesting characters like Erwin--someone selfish and ambitious and motivated with a goal in mind that requires a lot of sacrifices, someone ruthless and yet SMART enough to do what it takes to get to a place where he can pursue the knowledge he seeks. Like damn. I don’t like what he’s done any more than I like what other similar characters have done, and I acknowledge that the sacrifices of others were made meaningful by sheer luck, but it doesn’t make the overall picture any less fascinating to me.