#AND NOW HE UNFOLLOWED ME ON INSTA

[ja3yun]

let me tell you, men?? not worth a single part of your time

[jacaerysgf]

Ignored

Summary: Based on two requests; You had been best friends with Jacaerys since you were kids. But when he gets a girlfriend and joins the football team in college your whole life gets turned upside down and he's suddenly ditched you. A year after you are confronted by him and emotions spill to the surface.

w.c: 2.7k

c.w: Porn with plot, sub!jace, hand job, overstimulation, p in v, unprotected sex (WRAP IT UP), car sex, im not good at angry sex or mean stuff guys so sorry,

masterlist

One year. one fucking year since you’ve last spoken to him. You never imagined the two of you would end up like this.

He gets on the college football team and gets some hot girlfriend and suddenly he’s too good for you. You doubt he’s even noticed. It was slow to start, he started being busy during your weekly hang outs, then it would slip his mind to text you back, then he just suddenly stopped texting you. You had been replaced, you would always spend the holidays with his family but this past year you had seen Lucerys post on his insta holiday pictures and she was there instead. Everyone else in his family had reached out to you at some point. usually something along the lines of a happy holidays and that they hoped to see you soon, that they missed you. They even wished you happy birthday. He didn’t.

You had gotten to the point you stopped answering his family's texts, it made you feel sick when Lucerys asked if you would come to his birthday party and you didn’t have the heart to reply to him. You stopped checking their socials, even going as far as to mute them but you didn’t have the heart to unfollow them. then it would get too real, that the people you’ve considered family since you were basically a baby were no longer around.

You wish you didn’t miss him. You wish when started at your aunts gravestone he was not the face that appeared in your mind when you wished you had someone to comfort you. She had died six months ago, you hadn’t even bothered to text him about it. He met her a couple times, but its not like he would care now.

You do not cry for her anymore. Having come far enough in your grief, but you feel yourself come to a halt when you are walking through the graveyard and are stopped by a familiar family.

“Y/n?” You feel a knot grow in your throat. Why were they here? you could see lucerys was holding some flowers. “Hello.” What else are you supposed to say? You are frozen in place as lucerys walks over and throws his arms around you. “I missed you.” You try not to let your tears spill down your face as Lucerys pulls back and looks at you alarmed, “Are you okay?”

You laugh and cover your face with your hands, unable to even describe what you’re feeling. “You’re so tall.” Your voice cracks as you speak and he slaps you on the shoulder. “’Course i am, had to get taller than mr prince charming over there.”

You don’t want to look at him. You wish he was not even there. But you cannot help yourself the way your eyes drift to where Lucerys is referring to and you wish you hadn’t. He is as beautiful as he was the last day you saw him, he looks like he just came out of a romcom, a long trench coat covering him and a bouquet of flowers in his hands. You have no clue what he’s thinking, his face giving nothing away, cant take your eyes off him. The way his eyes have a gloss over them as he takes a couple steps towards you.

You swiftly turn away from his and notice rhaenyra standing at your side and she reaches out a grips your forearm. “It is so wonderful to see you dear.” You nod and smile at her, “It is always a pleasure Ms. Targaryen.” she hits your arm, “You stay away for a couple months and suddenly I’m Ms. Targaryen, call me rhaenyra dear you know better.” You want to correct her, tell her its been over a year. yet you don't, only nodding and apologizing to her.

“What are you doing here?” Its the first words he’s said to you in god knows how long. You swear your knees almost crumple at the sound of his voice. You want to punch him, spit in his face, you wish you hated him. “My aunt died.” You spit at the ground, you voice coming out angrier than you indented it to.

The people around you immediately flood around to give their condolences. You thank them, Lucerys especially kept you in a deep hug and mentioned how they came today to see rhaenyra's father but they'll make sure to stop by your aunt’s grave.

He says nothing. nothing at all. You hate him. You hate him so much. But you cant say no when they ask if you’ll join them to see viserys and your aunt. you cant even say no when they offer you to join them for dinner.

you two say nothing to each other, not until you say you’ll drive in your car on the way there and turn to walk towards it, still having the map to their house memorized until you are stopped, a hand gripping on your forearm.

“Can i ride with you?” You don't turn around to look at him. Continuing to stare straight ahead, your heart and head churning. You want to tell him no, that you don't wish to ever even see him again. “Please.”

“Fine.”

But you're a pussy. the biggest punk in the whole world as you watch him slide into the passenger seat as you close the drivers door. A silence fills the space between you two, you don't want to speak, a part of you hopes it will stay that way.

“What happened with us?” You harshly break at the red light and whip your head towards him. Rage boiling at your skin as you hiss at him, “What happened? What do you mean what happened? You're the one who ditched me!”

“What the fuck are you taking about?” “Oh so you’re just gonna act like you didn't fucking stop talking to me after you a girlfriend? What is her name? i don't even fucking know because you never introduced us.” A loud honk behind you forced you to turn your head away from him and back on the road, you swear your knuckles turned white from the pressure you were squeezing it.

“i-” “No. Because you know what Jace. Fuck you. Fuck you and your stupid face and your stupid girlfriend and your stupid friends because you fucking left me. You have no reason to sit around and ask me what the fuck happened between us because it was all because of you. i put in the effort to reach out i even sent you a fucking gift for your birthday because you couldn't spare the time to hang with me and you don't even text me a happy fucking birthday?!? Fuck you man.”

Your hands slam down on the wheel in frustration as you clench your jaw, the fucking nerve of this guy. You don’t even spare him another glance and he doesn't dare to say anything else for awhile. the drive is long, they were buried far out from your homes so the drive was over an hour.

it takes twenty minutes before he says anything. “I’m sorry.” It comes out strained, if you looked at him he would probably be crying but you do not dare look at him. “I wish i could explain to you why i did it, why i acted like that. But I’m sorry. I’m sorry i just think i liked the attention, i liked having people fawn over me. And her, fuck i don't know, i liked her sure, but she fucking cheated on me with one of the guys on the team, told me she only got with me to get closer to him. Its not an excuse, i should have never put what we had down the drain for someone that never really mattered because you, you matter to me more than anyone else. I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry, ill say it forever because i don't deserve your forgiveness.”

You pull over into a road side parking lot because you couldn't see the road anymore. Your eyes filled with tears as your shoulders shook with silent sobs, “I am sorry i made you feel this way, that you couldn't even come to me when she died, i liked it, i remember she gave me the toy car display i still have in my room fuck i can't even imagine how you must feel. I miss you. I miss you so much.”

You put your head against the wheel and allow yourself to sob. This is all you’ve wanted to hear for so long that now you have no clue how to feel. You want to tell him to fuck off. That he has no reason to be begging for your forgiveness now.

“Jacaerys,” You swear you hear it wrong, that you must be confused. He whimpers. “No please,” “Its dragged out in a way that has your stomach churning and you shift in your seat. “Don’t call me Jacaerys, Jace please.”

You must be strong. You cannot give into to his sad puppy eyes and cries. Yet you look over to him and feel your resolve crumble. He has tears streaming down his face. He’s looking at you. Has he been looking at you this whole time? “You left me Jace.” He lets out a trembled breath as he dares with shaky hands to grab yours. “I'm sorry. I will beg you to forgive me till the end of time because i will never deserve it. I need you.”

Your heart pounds against your chest as the two of you stare at one another. You feel your hands shake in his grip as the two of you unknowingly move closer to each other.

“I realized after i found out what she had done i was more upset about the fact you were not there more than anything. She had begged me to take her back but the only thing i could think about was you. I was so stupid and so blind i will never forgive myself. You are everything to me.”

“Jace,” He cups your cheeks and lets out a trembled breath, “I was a fool to let you go. I will never make that mistake again,” You cannot believe what is happening, he does not truly mean what you think he’s saying does he? “I had months to think it over. I am so madly in love with you. If you do not feel the same i will act like this never happened and we can just go back to being friends or even if you cannot stomach being around me we can just never talk but-”

He lets out a surprised moan as you shove your lips against his and eagerly pressed his lips against yours. He a lot more vocal than you had expected him to be, eagerly humming against your lips as his hands have moved to your neck.

He lets out a shocked gasp when you push him back into his seat and looks at you with wide eyes as you climb over his lap, pulling the level to have him lay over his back and simply stare at him as you hover above him. He whimpers as you grab the front of his shirt and pull him towards your face, “This is for me. Not you. Right?” He eagerly nods, more than willing to take anything you’ll give him.

He whines as you unbutton his black dress pants and waste no time shoving your hand past his boxers and gripping onto his dick. His head is thrown backwards as you rub your thumb against his tip, ignoring his mumbles until enough precum has dripped down onto your hand before you begin vigorously pumping him up and down.

You do not stop even as he’s asking you to slow down. Well you do, but it is always right before he’s about to come. You do this again. and again. and again. He feels like he’s about to burst, the stimulation is too much for him to bare.

“Please.” You tilt your head at him as he grips the front of your button down shirt. “What do you want?” Your words are spoken like he a stranger approaching you on the street, he whimpers and shoves his head into your chest, his tears threatening to spill out. “Please,”

“awe are you so fucked out you have no clue what you’re talking about huh?” He’s babbling nonsense as you feel his tears pool into your shirt. You fully remove your hands off him for the fourth time and he thinks he might crack. “Please no I’m sorry I’m sorry please please just let me,,” His words trail off as he watches you fully release him from his pants and boxers, his breath shaky as he watches you pool up your shirt and move to hover above him.

“Please please.” “Shut the fuck up.” He whimpers as his tip presses against your folds but you don’t him in enter yet, simply allowing his tip to be dragged up and down your slit. He throws his head back as the tears continue to flow down his face, he can’t take this, his hips rise up to try and thrust into you but you hold him down and spit at him. “You don’t know how to behave slut.”

He lets out a surprised gurgle of sounds when you suddenly slam all the way down onto him and lightly slap him across the face. “Are you happy now slut? You happy your little loser friend is fucking you stupid?”

He can barely speak as you begin to bounce up and down on him. He’s dreamed of this for much longer than he’d like to admit but this is much better than anything he could have imagined. The way your lightly let out sounds of delight are like music to his ears. He wishes he could say something but over the heat that flows over his body and the way he feels your hands slip under his shirt and begin to rub up and down his chest he can’t find the words.

He keeps his hands at his side, not knowing if he is allowed to touch you not wishing to upset you more than he already has. You notice the way his hands twitch and slightly raise as if he wants to reach out to you. You slow down for a moment to grab his hands and place them on your chest, a wordless exchange between the two of you as he stares at you in wonder. So much love fills his gaze you almost flush with embarrassment. You begin to pick up your pace once again as he fondles you over your clothes.

The pit grows larger in his stomach much faster than he would like but due to the overstimulation and the overflowing of emotions he’s on the edge. “I’m so close.”

“Hold it.” He whines and watches as one of your hands slip under your skirt, “You think you should be allowed to cum before me?” He shakes his head, of course not, he doesn’t deserve too.

He swears he almost cums from your blissed out face alone, but he is surprised he manages to contain himself until he feels you throb and your essence drips around him. You slowly lift off him and pump him until his cum drips down your hands.

The car windows are foggy, you have no clue how long you’ve been out here but the sun as begun to set as you allow yourself to fall against his chest, feeling the way his heart beats erratically as his arms come to wrap around you.

“I don’t forgive you,” He feels his heart drop as he gulps, bracing himself for you to lift off him and drop him off at his house, never to speak to him again. “But i think i can one day, you just have to take me out on a couple dates first.”

He grins.

Perm Jacaerys taglist

@tyronesien @itsbookworm987 @cruelworldlana @smurfelle @ireneispunk @hxtd @venmondiese @urmomsgirlfriend1 @aegonswife @jacesvelaryons

[onakomiyaki]

WHAT IS THIS | dr3 x brabham!reader | lh44 x brabham!reader (platonic) - smau

summary : you got into dating rumor with lewis hamilton after your sudden appearance in bahrain gp 2021. and your friend is not happy at all.

fc : emily ratajkowski, pinterest.

a/n : this is part of 'just a silly crush' universe, so i suggest you to read it first <3 and also this is just a small break (i lost the chapter 3 and 4 on my draft brb crying)

y/nbrabham.official

Liked by f1, lewishamilton, tommyhilfinger, and 1,786,901 others

y/nbrabham.official alright i take back what i said about cars go vroom-vroom. y'all cool, i guess.

big thanks to @ mercedesamgf1 and @ tommyhilfiger for inviting me!

View all comments

30 March 2021

user1 HELLO?!? F1 AND Y/N?!?!? WHAT DID I MISS?!?! WHEN WAS THIS?!

user2 she decided to wake up and choose chaos, because what the hell??!

lewishamilton Glad you came, Y/N! Come again next race? 😊

y/nbrabham okay hamilton, now you're pushing it too far 🙄

lewishamilton Well, at least I tried.😮‍💨

user3 HELLO?!?!? WHAT IS GOING ON

mercedesamgf1 Our best paddock girl! 🥰

y/nbrabham.official admin stop making me blush! 😳😳

user4 there's no daniel in the likes, what's going on?

user1 someone said that daniel is unfollowing her because she attend bahrain gp as lewis plus one, while he'd been trying to invite her since his debut race and she refuse to come.

user2 she's actually look sad and guilty when daniel refuse to look at her and avoided her at the whole race :(

user7 she doesn't deserve the spotlight :\ she only there because she is brand ambassador for tommy hilfiger. what did she knows about f1 anyway.

user5 GIRL SHE'S LITERALLY THE DAUGHTER OF DAVID BRABHAM?!?!

user4 blud is talking f1 knowledge to one of the brabham is crazy

mclaren maybe you can go to ours next race? 👀

redbullracing she will come to ours next, sorry.🫢

mercedesamgf1 BACK OFF I SAID 🤺🤺

user9 NAHHH THE ADMINS ARE ON IT AGAIN

y/nbrabham.official maybe... 🤔

user9 Y/N ?!?!?

danielricciardo posted a story!

lewishamilton

Liked by f1, y/nbrabham.official, maxverstappen, and 347,970 others

lewishamilton We out ✌🏾

Thanks for the photos and for supporting me, dear friend! @ y/nbrabham.official

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30 March 2021

y/nbrabham.official i look like that one kid in meme... the one who smile at the burning house... what is this lewis... 🤨

lewishamilton You look fine, Y/N stop worrying so much! 😩

y/nbrabham.official i am a model, of course i worry about my image 😤😤

user6 DEAR FRIEND??!? WHAT DOES THIS MEAN?!?

lewishamilton She is my beloved friend! (I got rejected)

y/nbrabhams.official we are friends! (plz ignore lewis)

user44 HE GOT WHAT BY WHO?!?

user1 only y/n could reject THE lewis hamilton.

user10 i mean it is y/n, she can reject me, spit on me, call me names and i would still thank her

user12 @.user10 okay grandma, lets get you back to bed.

mercedesamgf1 looking' fresh 🔥🔥

user9 MAX I SEE YOU

user3 it is probably daniel stalking with max's phone

maxverstappen I have no comment on that.

user33 MAX?!?!?!?

user2 BOY BFR RIGHT NOW

user4 WHAT DID YOU KNOW MAX VERSTAPPEN

landonorris 😶

user5 LANDO NORRIS?!

user11 ohh so this is what daniel story meant.. (im delulu)

user14 wait you might be onto something since daniel unfollow y/n.. (let me join you)

user23 OKAY BED TIME FOR YOU TWO, CHOP CHOP

"lew, daniel unfollowed me on insta. what should i do?" you said, voice panicking through the call.

"calm down, y/n. i'll try and talk to him." lewis, voice groggy, said.

it was almost 4 a.m in imola, and lewis had just finish reading a book. meanwhile it was 1 p.m for you in australia, and he is kind enough to listen to your sudden panic call. daniel had unfollowed you and you just notice that because you are opening your twitter after a week away from it.

the whole bahrain gp literally flooded your timeline so you just opted to stay off the twitter. which proven not so wise because now you're left with few chapters behind.

first, daniel unfollowed you. which of course understandable regarding the situation you're in. but daniel hasn't give you a chance to even apologize because that man is ignoring your messages and call and he of course won't read your dm

second, you just notice most of the grid is following you. other than few friend that you know about a.k.a daniel's friends, lance stroll, valterri bottas, and even zak brown decided to joining the bandwagon. and you know it won't be long until your next grand prix invitation.

"he is angry, y/n. that is understandable. and also why didn't you tell me sooner about your whole anti f1 agenda? i can prevent this disaster happen, you know that."

"yeah i know, i should've at least talk to you... but tommy really want me to go! he personally talk to me lew, how can i say no to him?"

"okay, fair. by the way, we've been friend for how long now? 3 years?"

"around that, yes. why?"

"and how long you've been friend with daniel?"

"umm, 19 years 20? i can't remember"

"yeah that outta do it. anyways i'll try talking to him okay? he avoided me too, maybe i'll ask max verstappen to help. i better go to sleep now, its like almost 5 a.m and my body is screaming."

"okay, you do that. i'm gonna go with my lunch... thanks lew."

"anytime, y/n."

anna watch as you return to your table with a suspicious look on her face. she never see you this restless or this nervous after your 'beef' with elsa hosk back in 2017. anna had her suspicion that it is about bahrain and she knew that it is partially her fault as well, but who knows?

"who was it?" anna asked, sipping her virgin mojito.

"lewis hamilton." you simply said, taking of your sunny as you open the menu.

"ohh, you finally agreeing on that second date?"

"what? no! he trying to help me to talk to daniel again."

"oh right, daniel."

"he didn't block me, but he definitely ignore me." you said, voice dejected.

anna wave her hand, calling the waitress to finally take your orders. you frown at her as the waitress approach both of you.

"i didn't order yet." you said.

"you've been ordering the same thing in this restaurant for almost 10 years, y/n. trust me i know what you want."

so you pout your mouth, rolling your eyes as you let anna order for you. she's not wrong that's why you let her be. this restaurant is one of if not the only restaurant that you always go to whenever you visit perth. you went here first time ever with daniel, back when you are 16. this restaurant just open then and you are excited to let daniel drive you around after finally getting his driver license.

"have you tried calling max? he is daniel closest friend on track right?" anna suggest, looking at you silently.

"should i?"

"try it."

and so you did. you open your phone, hovering at the contact name as you hesitate to press the call button. i mean it is 5 a.m at imola anyway, he won't pick up. right?

"hello?"

"uhh, hi max. this is y/n brabham. sorry for bothering you this early."

"ah don't worry i already woke up an hour ago. what can i help you?

"its about daniel."

"oh, yeah. bahrain?"

"yeah, he is mad at me. he won't answer his phone, unfollowed me on everywhere, and just avoiding me."

"he is mad at you, that's for sure. but he won't be mad at you forever. trust me, i know."

anna watch you in silence and you just looked away from her, staring at the ocean. you know anna is being nosy, but you let her anyway.

"i want to apologize to him... but how?"

"well, i have an idea. you have place in monaco right?"

"yeah, i do have house in monaco. why?"

"okay, here's the plan."

next masterlist

[spidybaby]

Forgive you, for what?

Summary: After the release of your new song, people start to make rumors about your relationship, making Gavi feel uncomfortable. (Singer!Reader)

Warnings: cursing, mentions of sexy time, implications of cheating.

Face Claim: Emilia Mernes

"Pablo, don't do that." You say, laughing at him hitting your hand away. Making you almost trop the PS5 controller.

You two were playing fifa. He taught you how to play it, and now he loves that you got to be able to beat him on the game.

"I swear to God, princesa." He laughs when you imitate him hitting your hands. "If you win I'm unfollowing you on insta."

Just as he says that, you score the winner goal of the game. You jump happy, laughing at how he sucks and you are the one and only winner.

He grabs you by the waist, pulling you down to lay on top of him. You laugh at him. Arms behind his neck and lips on his face.

You were careful with him, especially after his injury.

"I beat you." You laugh. Kissing his lips.

He loves these moments with you. Just you and him enjoying the company of each other and not thinking about work and all the responsibilities.

You love how his demeanor changed since the injury. You felt your heart being ripped off when you saw him get injured on the field.

With your help and this family, it was a hard way but he made it. You were so proud of him. He loved his progress as much as you loved to see him renewed and fresh.

"Let's cook something, you need to take your vitamins with food." You kiss his nose, making him scrunch it. "C'mon, mi amorcito."

He hugs you tightly, kissing your cheeks. He loves how shy and red you get when he focus his attention on your cheeks.

"I want a picture with you to remember how happy we are. Put on your shades." You reach over your phone and to where his shades were. Putting them on his face. "Di quesoooo." You smile at the camera.

"Quesoooo" He repeats. Laughing after a few pictures. You kiss his face while taking a few more. "Are you posting me on social media?" He asks, pretending to be serious.

"Why you care?" You follow his game. "You are going to unfollow me." You stick your tongue out for him.

"Maybe an appreciation post will make me follow you again." He jokes. Getting up from the couch and pulling you lightly. "Let's make Mac and cheese." He begs.

You nod, asking him to take the things you'll use. You grab your phone and choose a picture to post on your insta story.

Yourusername has added to close friends

You tagged him, even when the boy only goes on insta to repost something from the barca profile. And even when he can't repost it.

"Princesa, everything's ready." He calls you from the kitchen. "Ven, mi amor."

You smile, loving how he always picks the right way to call you and melt you from love at the same time.

🌸🌸🌸

"Perdonarte, para qué?

Para que vuelvas a fallarme otra vez?

No muchas gracias, ese chiste ya no me hace gracia."

You sing the lyrics to your new song that you have been working on with the Mexican group Los Angeles Azules.

You loved them since you were a child, and for you to be singing and filming a music video with them is a dream come true.

"You look amazing." The lead singer of the group tells you. "We heard your album when it got out and now on our way here to be able to get your energy."

"That's so sweet." You smile, hugging him. "My mom is going crazy about me being here with you. She's a big fan. We are."

You talk with all of them a little bit. Joking while filming. It was all so fun for you and to them too.

"Okay, take three. Y/n, from the beginning."

"Get over me, forget me

And think that it was just a dream what you lived with me

Get it together

There won't be any more pages of the best story you've read

With that, I say goodbye

Please, better not call me

I don't even want you as a friend

Forgive you, for what?

For you to fail me again?

No, thank you very much

That joke is not funny anymore." You sing the song while the music is playing over it.

Yourusername

Liked by pablogavi, angelesazulesmx and 2,573,837 others

Yourusername can't wait for this to be out. See you tomorrow ❤️💋

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angelesazulesmx 🤩🤩🤩

pablogavi ❤️

"Can you please tell me what this secret project is about?" Pablo begs. "Mi amor, I'm nosy." He pouts.

"I know, precioso." You laugh. "But I want you to see it the day it comes out and tell me your real reaction to it."

"I can do that right now." He pouts again.

"No, papi." You shake your head no. "That's not going to happen."

He understood your motives, you always show him your projects before hearing them, except the ones you want him to feel in real time.

"Hey, why did you unfollow me on insta?" You jokingly yell at him. "Amor, why?" You laugh.

"I told you I would." He laughs. "I did, I go by my word."

You talk with him for a little while. Packing your things to go back to Spain to practice for your tour leg in Europe.

"Did you tell her, Pablo?" You hear Aurora in the back of the call.

"Si." He shouts. "Amor, Aurora wants you to have lunch with her as soon as you land in Barcelona. Because she's leaving to Sevilla."

"Yes, tell Aurorita that I want that."

"I'll text you." Aurora yells again.

You laugh at her. You love his family, and you are very thankful that they love you back. It was a big piece in your relationship. The approval and love of your families.

"I have to go, I need to finish packing." You say as your phone pulls the notification of low battery. "Te amo, I'll see you tomorrow."

"Wait, don't come here, I'll come to you." He mentions quickly. "When are you landing?"

"I think at like 2 p.m." You say with doubt. "I'll text you when Aurora and I are done."

"Vale, te amo."

"Te amo más, see you soon, papi."

"See you soon, mami." He blows a kiss to you.

🌸🌸🌸

The song is out, and the Spanish press is making a huge deal out of it.

holacom

Liked by 24,574

holacom International singer Y/n released her new song in collaboration with Los Angeles Azules, a Mexican cumbian group, the song "Forgive you, for what?" became number one in multiple countries.

Fans are wondering if this new title has to do with Gavi, number six on the Barça first team, unfollowing her and about previous cheating rumors from the footballer.

(📸 @yourusername and @pablogavi)

Pablo hates when the media makes up rumors about you, and he definitely hates when they make rumors about your relationship.

When he heard the song, he never thought it was about you two or any situation that you two went through.

He was loyal to you. He can't be with anyone else when he has everything he ever wanted with you.

"Please, mi amor. Answer your phone." He tries one more time to FaceTime you. When the call goes to nothing. He feels frustrated. "Rora, please try one more time." He begs.

Aurora does. She tried to text you all morning, but the last text she got from you was before your plane took over. That was more than 15 hours ago.

"Nothing." She sighs, seeing his brother lose his mind over the tabloids. "Pablo, there has to be a reason. She won't just not answer you."

She feels cursed. Just when Pablo was relaxing, a notification popped up on his phone. You posted an instagram post.

yourusername

Liked by angelesazulesmx, mariabecerra and 5,485,486 others

Yourusername Gracias! I want to thank all of you for your amazing support and love to Perdonarte, para qué? (Forgive you, for what?)

Thank you so much to Los Angeles Azules and to everybody who worked hard to be able to make this possible. Forever in my heart ❤️

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pablogavisgirl pls don't tell me this is about Gavi😭😭😭

y/nfan1 love the song but pls tell us this isn't a confirmation of the rumors of Gavi cheating on you

gavihater1 happy you finally realized he was not worthy and that you are too much for him anyway

His face drop, why weren't you answering him but you were posting?

He wants to yell, he wants to throw his phone to the wall and pretend this shitshow isn't happening.

"I need to be alone for a moment." He excuses himself to his sister.

But in the United States airport, you were locked in a room with no phone and no way of communicating to anyone.

"How much until she can leave?" You manager asks the immigration guy. "This is ridiculous. She's a singer, and her visa is only a day into the six months rule."

"Ma'am I don't make the rules. But this is my job, and I can't just let her break the law just cause she is a singer."

"I know, I'm not asking you to break anything. I'm just telling you that it's been seven hours since we landed here. We already told you and showed you proof that this is just a connection flight."

You were mad. You were supposed to be in the United States for only an hour and you already spent seven hours while the immigration officer confirmed the story that you were a singer and your trip to Barcelona was with working purposes.

All because your visa was one day into the six months limit where you can't fly. That was an honest mistake from your manager, you can't blame her.

"Can I at least have some food?" You ask the police who was with you in the room. "Please."

He ignores you. You were mad, you were just passing by, not like you were colonizing their land.

"Okay, you are free to go." The same immigration dude came to open the door for you. "Good luck at your concert."

You didn't even flash a smile. You wanted to give him a piece of your mind, but you weren't. "Good night." You say.

You hug your manager. Telling her how tired you were and how you needed food and a long sleep.

"You'll have seven hours to do that." She walks with you. "I got us a private jet, no more stupid commercial flights."

"And good thing is that your song is number one on the charts." Your assistant tells you. "And I posted a thank you to Los Angeles Azules and to your fans."

You don't even have the energy to care about a post or anything. "My phone is dead." You mention. "I was on like 10% before they took me in"

You walk to a coffee shop, getting something to drink while your assistant got you something to eat.

"Here." She hands you the food. "And your phone is charging. Here." She left the phone with the power bank attached.

You calmly eat while watching a movie. When you have more energy to finally do more than just be a potato, you pick your phone.

Your eyes widen at the sight of all the missing calls from Pablo, Aurora and your friends. "I have to call Pablo." You say.

"No." Your manager snatchs your phone off your hands. "You need sleep, Pablo is probably worry and that's okay, but sleep."

She didn't want you to find out about the drama the tabloids are doing. She wants you to get to Barcelona with at least a little energy and then deal with it.

y/n.hq

Liked by aurorapaezg, antonellaroccuzzo and other 1,472,380 others

y/n.hq three randoms. One you'll understand later, one listening to Perdonarte, para qué? and one before our plane took out to Barcelona, where the new leg of the tour began.

View all 34,572 comments

gavihater2 love how you are ignoring everything about that excuse of a player

y/nfan2 amore, please tell us you and Gavi aren't done 😭😭😭

_ferminlopez can I get free tickets?

bcnboyslover FERMIN NOT YOU HERE 😭

gavilover34 baby you can afford them

gaviandy/nlover is this the way they tell us everything is fine and they're still together? Fermin?

"C'mon Pablo, please pick up." You try one more time. "Papi, I need you. Answer" You whisper, nervous about the whole drama that the media pulled.

When you landed in Barcelona, it was 11 pm. So you needed your bed and a pill to be able to sleep all night.

The repercussions came when you woke up to your friends blowing your phone with questions about Gavi, Aurora asking you if you were okay and to call her and the worst.

Pablo texting you that he was hurt that you weren't answering, you were just letting the fire get to him about something you denied him access. And asking you if that was your plan for the beginning.

You called Aurora, who was in Sevilla at that point. You explained to her what happened, and she understood your tired state. Not blaming you for what you did as soon as you landed.

She texted Pablo, asking him to let you explain yourself, how you wouldn't do what he thinks you did.

But you weren't going to wait until his mad state is over. You needed to talk to him face to face, and even if he didn't want it to, you do.

You open the door of his house with your spare key. "Pablo!" You yell for him to hear that it was you. "Pablo Martín!" You yell again.

You walk to his kitchen, nothing. The living room, nothing. His room, nothing again.

You were nervous, he wasn't there. You pase around thinking where he was. Was he with Fermin? Was he with Pedri? At one of la masia boys? Where?

You were so into your mind that you don't hear the front door being open or the steps coming to the bedroom.

But you do scream when the door is fully open in a quick motion. Making Pablo jump scared. "Por la puta, qué mierda?" He asks, hand on his heart.

"Pablo!" You say happy, hugging him and kissing his face. His hands are on your sides, not really hugging you, more like keeping you steady. "Mi amor, I'm sorry about not being able to answer. I was trapped and I wasn't able to take my flight."

"Y por qué si pudiste subir fotos?" He asks, pushing you away from him. "Hmm?" (And why did you have time to post?)

"I didn't, papi, that was my assistant." You try to explain. "Papi, I would never do anything to hurt you."

"Well, you did." He walks into the bathroom, ignoring you while taking his clothes off. Ready to take a shower.

"Pablo, please!"

He got into the shower, not caring that you were there. Nothing you haven't seen before, so you walked into the bathroom.

You open the glass door. Water slashing all over your shoes and legs. "Pablo, I'm not going anywhere."

"Entonces quédate ahí." (Then stay there) he continued with hos shower routine without a care in the world.

You close the door. Removing your shoes and clothes, except for your underwear. You weren't giving up just like that.

"Mira, Pablo." You grab his shoulders, hands removing the foam from his forehead to he could see you. "I was forced to stay at a freaking two meters office with a very mean police dude in New York." You explain.

He pays attention, even though he doesn't want to, he respects you enough to hear you.

"I was tired, I was jet lagged, I was hungry and thirsty, but I couldn't even move without the dude reaching for his taser."

You feel your eyes watering. You were stressed. The song was supposed to be something good. You with your favorite cumbia group, doing a Spanish language song after two English albums. Not this mess.

"I was tired." You cry. "And I wanted my boyfriend to understand. But he is too busy playing the hurt one when he knows I would never be the type to leave him with a song. Especially after talking to him on the phone and saying I love you."

You back away from him. Letting him see you discomfort. He felt bad, all that anger, and the words he sent you over text weren't even reasonable. You were right.

"I'm sorry." You say. "I should have asked my assistant to text you something to let you know I was okay. I'm I haven't been able to clean your name from the drama. I just want us to be okay. Is that possible?"

He nods, and you hug him carefully. Not wanting to take a bad step and slip I to the shower.

"Te amo, please don't ever think I don't." You say. "And if I don't contact you after a flight, please know it's because I was: a, put into custody of the immigration department. b, probably death asleep. And c, maybe in the air with no phone battery."

You make him laugh, the sound of it being the only thing you needed.

"Te amo, princesa." He kisses your forehead. "I was an insecure person, and I'm sorry about it. I'm sorry about that text. Maybe all the shit did got to my head."

"Then let's wash it off." You interrupt him, joking about his hair having shampoo and foam. "It's okay, I get insecure too. And just like you do, I'll be here to make you not feel like it." You kiss him. You quickly pull away. "Maybe let's take this shampoo off of you, it taste terrible."

He laughs, pulling you a little to the water falling. "What if you let me help you shower that tension away?" He asks, kissing your neck.

"Your injury." You remind him.

"Don't worry, I have my hands to do the work for me." He smirks, hands traveling to the elastic of your panties. "I love you."

"Really?" You ask, breathlessly. You kiss him. Your hands reach for the lock on your bra, undoing it. "Show me." You say, taking the remaining clothes off.

yourusername

Liked by aurorapaezg, pablogavi, _ferminlopez and 6,483,382 others

yourusername a little appreciation post for this amazing boy, who also happens to be my boyfriend and one of my biggest supporters.

I love you to the moon and back. Thank you for everything, Pablo ❤️ You are the 6 on the pitch, but the 1 in my heart 🌸✨️❤️

View all 568,448 comments

aurorapaezg los amo mucho ❤️

yourusername te amamos ❤️✨️

pablogavi I love you, my one 🌸✨️❤️

gavifan1 AHHH HE'S USING HER EMOJIS😭❤️

gadrilover he calls her my one 🥺🥺🥺

_ferminlopez romantic much?

_ferminlopez so about those free tickets 😗

yourusername no ❤️

pablogavi 🤣🤣🤣

_ferminlopez @yourusername wow 👌🏻

[thearchercore]

Also Charles congratulating Max on Austria 2019 by tagging him on his post and then literally unfollowing him will never not be funny to me 😭😭 like we know you were planning his murder right there Charles, who held you at gunpoint to write that post

And Max is such a petty bitch for never mentioning Charles in his insta posts but always alluding to him like what do you mean trouble came to me why are you so extra 😭

It’s a miracle we came out of 2019-20 without any restraining orders being filed

them unfollowing each other while being on the same plane home? like???

they're so dramatic but like the way you just know max is TRAUMATIZED after austria 2019 because he never apologizes but RAN to apologize to charles for the turn 1 incident in vegas the second charles did not greet him (charles was initially not happy about ferrari strategy, and not max, so it was a false alarm - which max did not know)

but like just the possibility freaked him out so much, it was really funny. you will never see max go on such a big apology tour like that one lmao

you can notice they must have built a decent friendship after they managed to deal with the years of lore they had, but just the growth from austria to now? insane.

[folklorebae]

𝐈𝐧𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐫𝐚𝐦 𝐀𝐔 - 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐑𝐮𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐬

Spin-off of my rockstar's girlfriend

Cast(s): Rockstar!Eren & Model!Reader

Cw: swearing, reader using she/her pronouns, slight hange x reader, food

A/n: haven't posted anything for months! hope you guys love this one<33

Liked by sashablouse and 4,715,937 others

yourinstagram life recently...

View all 15,725 comments

angelicyn WE MISSED YOUUUU

ynfan23 glad you post this when im still awake

yndaily OMG YOUR PUPPY ISNT A PUPPY ANYMORE. ITS BEEN A LONG TIME SINCE WE SAW HER ON YOUR/EREN'S STORY😭

↳yourinstagram i know! but she's getting smarter and cuter. i love her so much, she's my girl:)

erenfan19 i dont see eren... soo the rumors are true?? :((

↳ynfan24 girl, she's her own person and this is her insta. besides, that man is childish lmao. imagine unfollowing THE Y/N L/N just because she doesn't attend his concert in europe...

14,937 likes

justjared After getting unfollowed by her long-time boyfriend last week, Y/N L/N was spotted walking out of Oscar-winning costume designer Hange Zoe's apartment building this morning. New couple alert?

View all 3,714 comments

ereyn.daily i'm happy if y/n's happy🥲

goddessyn cmon, we all know they've been friends for ages. stop spreading stupid rumor like this

erenfan20 not gonna believe anything till one of them confirm it in front of my face

26,638 likes

paradis.memes Thoughts?

View all 3,926 comments

paradisfan7 Im not believing this shit

erenfan21 she doesnt wanna marry him, im crying😭

↳paradisfan8 she once said she's jo march kinnie😭

↳ynfan25 How do you know she doesn’t wanna marry him? Maybe he doesn't wanna marry her? We don’t know what happened behind the curtain unless Y/N and Eren themselves actually comment on it .

erenfan22 guys, if you read the article that @people posted, at the end they said “Reps for Jaeger and L/N have not commented on the breakup.”

Liked by arminarlert and 3,916,939 others

paradisofficial Paradis World Tour. Antwerp. May, 2023.

View all 9,826 comments

paradisfan9 YOU GUYS WERE SO AWESOME😭❤️

paradisfan10 PLS PLS COME BACK TO ANTWERP ASAP. ALSO THE SURPRISE SONG?!? BED OF ROSES?!?

paradisfan11 so sad cant see you guys perform last night🥲💔

paradisfan12 if you guys dont cover “bed of roses” on your Asia Tour, you're racist.

↳paradisofficial We've agreed that every region will have different song to cover. Thank you for your support😊

↳paradisfan12 OMG I WAS JOKING LMAO (i mean, not really)

Liked by annieleonhart and 2,916,820 others

sashablouse unseen🤓

tagged: @yourinstagram @nicolo

View all 5,919 comments

nicolo 🤍

Liked by sashablouse

conniespringer dude, what were you doing in the first pic

↳sashablouse cause you're just a man 🙄

yourinstagram dont wanna be a third wheel anymore...

11,726 likes

paradisupdatee New Setlist For Europe Tour! I've upgraded the playlist, link in bio.

View all 1,826 comments

paradis.devil see you at accor arena tmrw!!

↳paradisupdatee See you, bby<3

paradisfan13 the fact they didnt cover any song in northern europe countries😀

paradisfan14 I literally flew from brussels to london last month to see them perform AND THEY DIDNT SING BED OF ROSES?!? I WAS ROBBED!!

↳paradisfan15 sameeee i attended some of their shows in us last year and they didn't cover any song 😭

paradisfan16 is this eren's way to confirm the breakup rumors?😭

Liked by carlajaeger and 5,916,028 others

yourinstagram the rumors are terrible and cruel...

View all 29,317 comments

ynln.jpg dont tell me you're in paris...

taylorswift but honey, most of them are true🤭

Liked by yourinstagram

↳yourinstagram patiently waiting for 1989 (Taylor's Version)😊🙏

↳ynfan25 soo the rumors are true?🥲

↳ereyn.daily i'm in spain without s

ereyn.exposing Whatever ereyn does is only for promo. It's a fact that eren is not going to follow y/n or ever going to post her picture on his Instagram again.

↳yourinstagram seems like you guys have been talking about this and tag me in a few posts everyday. but now please, i beg you to stop. it's just negative, i really have no hard feelings towards you. i just know what a beautiful world there is to go out and live in instead of trying to dissect a relationship between two people that you don't even know. i don't need his follow, my name is permanently tattooed to his arm. This is my final comment on this, but i want you to know that it's not meant to offend you. just hoping you can find something else in life to be inspired by xx

↳erenfan23 OMG OMG OMG YESS YOU TELL THEM QUEEN

↳ynfan26 FINALLY PEOPLE COULD SHUT THEIR MOUTH NOW. THESE "EXPOSING" ACCOUNTS ARE ANNOYING AF

↳erenfan24 I think you should've messaged them, instead of calling them out publicly like this. no offense, still love you tho

↳yourinstagram i see why you think that ought to have been a direct message, and i agree. i just didn't considered it. it's all really frustrating, and i'm only human... you guys understand how hurtful assumptions like this can be, especially when they are made about someone i care about a lot. if you guys care about him too, you'll eventually realize that we are on the same team. i apologize if it came off as impolite or rude. i was simply attempting to start a conversation so people would realize that their statements were painful rather than just an "anonymous confession." this cruel internet culture has no benefit for society as a whole. 

19,862 likes

ereynpost “You guys are crazy, you know that? No... I don’t think my girlfriend and I need another dog for now. What about you, Jean?” — Eren laughs as he answers a fan's sign.

USHSSUDSHDUAJSYSHS GUYSSS THE RUMORS ARENT TRUEEEE THEY'RE STILL TOGETHER OMFG!!!!

View all 3,749 comments

its.ereyn Girl, I almost deactivate this account

↳ereynpost PLS, SAME😀

ynfan27 OMG MY EREYN HEARTTT

erenfan25 PARENTS OMG😭😭😭

ynfan28 I can die in peace now, thanks

Liked by mikasackerman and 6,948,163 others

erenjaeger My love, my lady, the most precious human on this earth. I'm really grateful because we have an incredibly meaningful, loving, and fun relationship. As you guys know, this world is cruel and I'd do anything to make her the happiest, but I've failed to do it. I personally love it when people make assumptions or speculations about me, because I know they all wrong. But when people start to say something hurtful to my woman, I can't tolerate it.

Six years of relationship and we have never ever broken up, not even once, if that's what you all really want to know. She's my present and future, she's the one who teaches me how forever feels. The love I have for her only gets stronger and bigger, it's crazy to think about it. Thank you for all the love and support, we really appreciate it.

View all 53,027 comments

erenfan26 I TOLD YOU ALL THEY'RE ENDGAME

ynfan29 how to find myself a man like you😭

erenfan27 oh he is, he really is in love🥹❤️

yndaily the fact that i'll never experience this type of love hurts a lot. but i couldnt be more happier for you two💓

jeankirschtein ngl, at first i did believe you two broke up

↳erenjaeger bro, fuck off

↳erenfan28 LMAO JEANNNN, IM CRYINGG😭😭😭

ereyn.daily As iconic as David Bowie and Iman❤️

↳yourinstagram thank you, but I don't deserve this compliment. also, your comment will boost eren's ego, he'll think he's as good as him

↳erenjaeger why would you say that:(

(+bonus on what really happened lol)

[kindestofkings]

dear john

elijah hewson x singer!reader

(ex!charles leclerc cause hes a hot red flag)

plot: its giving friends to strangers to friends again to lovers 🫶🏼

face claim: laufey <3

warning: spelling mistakes

authors note: this is for the lovely anon who requested a speak now inspired smau ! Hope this is okay?!? I was tempted by doing something on the vibe of speak now the song but imma think on it 🫡

yourusername

liked by charlesleclerc and others

yourusername wow last night on tour was something special 😢 to everyone who sangs my songs back to me and everyone who's supported my little dreams, I LOVE YOU.

view all other comments

lucydacus killing it !

yourusername luv you <333

phoebebridgers voice of an ANGEL

yourusername ooh stop im blushinggg

charlesleclerc beautiful as always mon ange

ynfan1 post concert blues are toooo real

wagsandstuff

liked by ynfan1 and others

wagsandstuff huh that doesn't look like yourusername to us.... did the couple of 3 years break up without telling us??

view all comments

ynfan1 nooooooo that girl on twitter was right ah

ynandcharlesshipper charlessss man don't do this

charlesfan she was always feeding off of him

ynfan2 she has her own career you do know that right? she a really popular singer

ynfan2 not charles cheating on our QUEEN

yourusername just unfollowed charlesleclerc

yourusername just added to their story!

lol gonna go heal my heart I guess lol

replies:

yourmum awh my beautiful girl :( glad you're coming home 💘

↳ can't wait to see you mam

yourbestfriend men are literal pigs.

phoebebridgers he's an idiot, here for you if you need anything

elijahhewson hey I know it's been awhile since we last spoke, but the lads and I are always here for you. I should've been better at keeping in touch, but I'm so sorry this happened to you.

↳ hey E, missed you! I'm just as much at fault, guess we all just got so busy with tours (both so successful heheh). where abouts in the world are you? I'm heading home for awhie maybe we could all catch up?

↳ elijahhewson deadly! myself, ryan and josh are home and bobby is back next week, call around whenever

inhalerfanaccount

liked by inhalerfan1 and others

inhalerfanaccount did you guys know that yourusername is friends with inhaler??? I found all of these oldies while lurking her insta !

view all other comments

inhalerfan1 bless they're so young, they all must of been friends during school !

inhalerfan2 crazy to think they've all become so successful

ynfan1 wow my two worlds colliding

ynfan2 I've always secretly hoped yn and eli would get together

inhalerfanaccount friends to strangers to friends to lovers hits soooo hard

yourusername

liked by bobbyskeetz and others

yourusername time is a terrifying thing..

view all comments

yourmam I could probably find an even earlier pic...

bobbyskeetz I beg please no inhalerfan1 pleaseeeeee

elijahhewson smash x4

joshjenkinson_ the gang getting back together has 2024 winninggg

(liked by yourusername,ryanmcmahon_15 and others)

ynfan1 yesss bitch remind that silly boy who drives in circles of all the hot friends you have !!!

(liked by elijahhewson and others) ynfan2 hahahah eli woke up and choose chaos

yourusername

liked by phoebebridgers and others

yourusername turning all this heartbreak into something good ! dear john is the rawest I've ever been in my songwriting, treat her with love x

view all other comments

ynfan1 so so incredibly beautiful, thank you for sharing

lucydarcus you're a wonder

ryanmcmahon_15 sobbing uncontrollably and ready to fight him

bobbyskeetz you good bro ?

charlesfan1 tough day to be a charles fan

ynfan2 omg those lyrics are HEARTBREAKING

inhalerfanupdates

liked by eliswife and others

inhalerfanupdates WHO HAS THIS MAN SO SMILEY???

view all other comments

inhalerfan1 FOR REAL?? hes usually so moody

elijahhewson posted to their close friends!

replies yourusername pure stalker when did you take this pic??

vogue

liked by yourusername and others

vogue with just days before the release of her highly anticipated spohmore album we chatted to yourusername about love, loss and all things in between;

" you dont realise how easy love can be until you're with the right person. its the most annoying thing to hear when you dont have it but some how I was fortunite enough to discover"

find out what else the singer told us at the link in our bio !

view all other comments

yourusername THANK YOU FOR HAVING ME

ynfan1 shes so happy and in love

ynfan2 how can one person be so talented, smart AND intelligent

charlesfan1 eww cant believe charles used to date her!

ynfan3 love how shes not petty like the leclerc fangirlies clearly still are..

yourusername

liked by elijahhewson and others

yourusername a year and a half ago I had my heartbroken, felt completed untethered and so so confused. today I give you my pride and joy!

this album features songs I wrote as a sobbing mess, some I wrote while I was healing and finally some I wrote after I opened my eyes and embraced what I had all along.

I love them all, I love everyone who worked on it with me and I escially love you.

comments have been restricted

yourusername

liked by lucydarcus and others

yourusername one single thread of gold tied me to you <3

view all other comments

elijahhewson hell was the journey

yourusername but it brought me heaven. bobbyskeetz gross yourusername child

joshjenkinson_ my parents

yourmam my favourite pair !

evehewson sobbing it was always meant to be

phoebebridgers the sweetest love for the sweetest soul

(liked by elijahhewson and yourusername)

ynfan1 OMGOMGOMGOMGOMG

finished

authors note: ahh im a broken record with the friends from home trope but its my favourite 🥲 hope you all enjoy, please as always let me know what you think!!

[thatmooncake]

It me! Hello and welcome - hope you enjoy your stay 💖

Current fixation: FNAF (Sun and Moon in particular but I love all of the characters)

Don’t be shy, I joined this fandom to share the love and interactions make my day!

(I can also be found on Twitter and Insta with the same handle but I’m a little more active on here for the most part!)

Note: If you sent me an ask and I didn’t respond I may (a) not have seen it, (b) have forgotten to say something (and/or now a lot of time has passed since the ask was sent), (c) be hoping to draw something for it and possibly got waylaid (yes even months later sometimes), or (d) I am hanging it up in my inbox like a beloved fridge drawing! <3

I shouldn’t have to say this and yet here we are: Anon hate will be blocked on sight. If you’ve got a problem or a hot take you won’t even put your name behind, you’re better off hitting unfollow/block and going about your day. I won’t be publishing your ask or responding to it or sparing it any thought. No exceptions. ✌️

Links:

Ko-fi and commission info

AO3

Art fight

DCA friend pick up discord server (DCA server for making friends)

Platonic DCA enjoyers discord server (Star Bench)

2024 DCA fanzine (in the works)

Tags:

Art tag

Writing tag

Analysis/Thoughts tag

Asks tag

AUs:

Caged moon (does this count as an AU? Lmao)

Moonshoe crab (Moon but he’s a horseshoe crab - small critter, likes to burrow and eat carrot slices)

Magical Mascots (theme park AU - shared with @flinxypie 💖)

Therapy Bots (therapy bots AU - shared with @flinxypie 💖)

Spider moon (that one comic where Moon can grow extra arms on demand)

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA FOR NOT BREAKING UP W MY BF?

My (mid-twenties woman) boyfriend (a little younger than me) and I have been dating for 2.75 years. 6 months into our relationship, he made some comments emphasizing how an old crush of his was reciprocated when we ran into said girl. Around that same time he neglected to tell me a slumber party he was attending with coworkers would include women. When I confronted him about these he said he just didn’t realize those things would make me uncomfortable. It should be noted though, that two days into us dating, there was a miscommunication where one of his female friends immediately hit me up, so I don’t understand where he’d get the stance i’d be okay with any of that.

Those events led me to going through his phone, finding thirst trap photos from 4 months into our relationship of mutuals of his that lived in our city, screenshotted from their SNS. There were also a ton of half-naked Insta models. When I confronted him about this, he said they were just things he thought he needed to have to contribute to group chats he was in with his male friends.

At the conclusion of that conversation, he deactivated (not deleted) his Insta and unfollowed all of his female friends on socials. I told him that was extreme and my main issue was all the sexual content and connections with old flames. Regardless, that’s what he did. Part of me felt icky, like if he needed that much leeway to respect my boundaries maybe he’s not trustworthy at all.

Fast forward to now, nearing three years, and I still sometimes get the feeling he’s hiding things from me. This has led me to, in the past month, try to covertly find out anything. My poker face is terrible, though, and it’s very easy to tell when someone’s been through your phone. In the past, he’s brought up how I should trust him again by now. For the most part I do, but there’s always a voice in my head telling me that men lie. And him knowing I would go through his phone would just mean “he’s better at hiding things now if he needed to”.

So i’m always wondering if I should’ve just broken up with him, because I don’t know if I can trust him 100%. Our relationship keeps going through these deep valleys because I just can’t trust he wouldn’t do something if given the chance. Am I being an asshole by continuing this relationship?

What are these acronyms?

[gggreengoblin]

2142 words. Inspired by this post and I put my own twist (and insecurities) into the mix. Girl!Daniel who was so in love with Max having a late quarter life crisis because of Kelly's instagram posts and stories during their summer break. Thanks to toastandvegemite and their brilliant mind. CW :: WAG (Kelly), girl!Daniel is a little bit depressed in this story

This is just a fiction, yes, not real. English is my 3rd language so please be gentel.

Daniel had never imagined that she would be standing at the food aisle, 7 pm on Tuesday, tears welling up in her eyes while looking for a specific brand of cooking chocolate. She had been listening to Lana del ray all day, now all she wanted was making the most chocolaty chocolate brownie that ever made for her pity party.

'Did you know a singer can still be looking like a sidepiece at thirty-three?' Every time she heard that part of the lyrics from 'A&W'  her brittle heart crumble. Since when can song lyrics be so painful? Since when did she relate so much to a song.

Being a "sidepiece" might still be better than whatever kind of hell Daniel was in. Because Daniel was even more pathetic than "the other woman" or "the sidepiece". "The other woman" could at least have the person she loves, even if only for a moment. But Daniel could only admire the person she loved from a distance. Even that person didn't know if she had feelings for him.

The man she loved was spending his summer break on the Mediterranean Sea with his girlfriend. He was dancing with his beautiful and perfect girlfriend at a beautiful resort with amazing view. Remembering this put a heavy feeling in Daniel's chest. She wanted to lie down on the floor and cry her heart out. A little bit dramatic, she knew.

Daniel should unfollow Max and Kelly's instagram accounts. Seeing their insta story updates only makes things worse for Daniel. But that would bring up questions in people's minds. Maybe muting them would be enough.

Daniel took out her cell phone and opened Instagram when someone stood beside her and tapped Daniel on the shoulder. If Daniel didn't have good driver reflexes she would have dropped her phone.

"Jeepers! Max, what are you doing here? I thought you were still on vacation." Daniel removed the earphone she was wearing from her left ear.

Max just laughed.

Daniel looked into Max's shopping cart. He brought two big packs of cat litter.

"I came back to Monaco this afternoon. I'm out of litter so I have to buy some. What are you looking for?" Max looked at Daniel's shopping basket. Daniel has put in the eggs, flour and butter she needs for her brownies.

"Cooking chocolate and cocoa powder." Daniel took the closest chocolate and cocoa powder from her.

"What are you going to make?"

"Brownies."

Daniel looked at Max. Max was wearing a hat but Daniel knew that under the hat Max's normally brown hair had now turned blonde due to the Mediterranean summer sun. Max's facial skin also had a golden glow with a little hint of red on his cheeks. Seeing Max felt like looking directly at the sun, but it wasn't daniel's eyes that ached, it was her heart.

"I should go home now. Bye!"

Max held Daniel by the shoulders.

"Daniel, are you okay? You look tired?"

"Gee, thanks, Max." Daniel replied sarcastically.

Of course Max looked at daniel like she was not okay. Daniel was only wearing a hoodie and pajama bottoms, her hair in messy bun. Daniel usually still wears nice clothes and light makeup when she leaves her house, but she didn't have the energy or will to do any of that.

"I'm having a lot on my mind." Daniel wanted to hide from Max's eyes.

That blue eyes looked curious.

"I thought you were going to Perth for summer break."

Max took Daniel's shopping basket and put it in his cart.

"Let me come with you. I don't want you to be alone now. You don't look well."

Daniel did not protest. Who was she to say no to Max after not seeing him for almost a month. She followed Max to the self checkout. She stood behind max and studied the man's broad back.

"Do you need anything else?" Ask Max before they get to self checkout.

Daniel just shook her head. For a while she let herself listen to Lana while looking at Max. Max turned his back on Daniel, he wouldn't be able to see Daniel's pathetic face.

........

Arriving home, Daniel connected her cell phone to the sound system in her kitchen. She put the coffee mug and plate she used earlier into the sink. She also wiped down her kitchen island. Daniel was a little relieved she had cleaned out her apartment last night, at least Max wouldn't have seen her house in such a mess.

Max put her groceries on the kitchen island which had been wiped clean. Max had taken off the jacket and hat he was wearing. Now he sat on the barstool and watched Daniel without saying anything. Only lana's voice was heard between them.

Daniel took off the hoodie she was wearing and also her sweatpants and just left them bunch up on her bed. Now she was only wearing her merch t-shirt and cotton shorts. She didn't care. Max knew her for very long time, of course Max has seen Daniel in a worse condition than now.

Daniel opened her fridge and took out a can of redbull, she also took out the brownie recipe which she attached to the fridge using a piece of decorative magnet. She passed the redbull can to max who opened it immediately.

"I didn't know you could bake." Max said as he took a sip of his redbull.

Daniel took out the cake ingredients they had bought on the kitchen counter. He also took sliced almonds, chocochips and chocolate paste from the refrigerator.

"After becoming a test driver I had a lot of free time, Max. So I tried new things."

Max unknowingly touched on a sensitive topic for Daniel. One of the things that made it difficult for Daniel to fall asleep at night.

Becoming a Redbull development driver was not an easy thing for Daniel. Of course Redbull is a big team to be reckoned with, being part of Redbull is also an achievement but she had a dream to be able to compete in the grand prix. Became the first female driver since 1978. That dream was completely fading.

Daniel even had to fight with her teeth and nails to cling to that empty dream. Maybe she should had let go of her ridiculous dreams after turning 30. Moved on with dignity, return to Australia and settle down for good.

Before she could cry in front of Max, Daniel turned around and took the scales from one of the drawers. Daniel weighed all the ingredients she needed. Flour. Cocoa powder. Sugar. Butter. She chopped the cooking chocolate before weighing it.

"Aren't you happy, Daniel?"

"Do I look unhappy?" ask Daniel.

"Yes." Max answered quickly and honestly. "It was like you were about to cry."

"Like I said before, I've got a lot on my mind."

"What's wrong? Are you sick? How is your family?"

"Is it because of the money? Do you have financial problems so you can't go back to Australia during the break?" Max asked so quickly. Letting out of question after question is like releasing arrows.

Daniel took a large glass bowl and put the ingredients in for the batter. She wanted to whipped the batter manually. She wanted to feel her arm muscles got tired. She wanted to feel a little bit of muscle pain so that the pain in her heart would lessen.

Daniel beat the eggs and sugar using a medium sized whisk. After that he put the sifted flour and cocoa powder into the mix.

"Say something, Daniel. You can tell me anything. If you want to, of course."

Max looked at Daniel with his blue eyes. Blue maldives eyes.

Max was everything daniel wasn't. Male, young, successful.

"I'm fine, my family too. I have money, Redbull pays me well."

"So, what's going on?"

"I'm going through some kind of a crisis maybe. Like a quarter life crisis but in my 30s."

"I will cry if I talk about this."

"Hey, there's nothing wrong with crying. Daniel, it's just me. You can cry if you want."

"Max, I don't know where to start. I have too much on my mind."

"Are you happy in Monaco?"

Daniel thought for a moment. Is she happy here? Does she feel happy coming home to an empty house? Everyone she knew slowly began to leave this place to make a new start, something serious, more precious, something they build brick by brick,  something they would die for.

"I don't think so. I've been feeling isolated lately. I'm far from my family. My friends aren't here anymore. Every day I see only strangers."

Daniel put down her batter, washed her hands and sat beside Max.

"I feel left out. It's not that I want to- I don't know how to explain it."

"Just slowly, take your time."

She took a deep breath, a shaky one. 

"I feel stupid for clinging to my dream of becoming a driver while we all know my chances are so small. Now I'm 34 years old, my dream has failed and I have nothing."

Daniel felt how her tears spilled out. So warm on her skin. Salty as they flowed past her speaking lips.

Max stood up and put his arm around her. Warping her in a warm comforting hug.

"So you want to leave the f1? Build a family?"

She nodded. "Leaving f1, yes. Starting a family doesn't seem like it. Too late."

"Of course it's not too late, you're still 34 years old."

"He already has a family." Daniel whispered into Max's chest. Her voice was small.

"Huh?"

"He's already build his own family." Daniel said louder. "He has a beautiful family. He has a beautiful woman, always perfect beside him. How can I compete with his girl, I look like- I'm so boring compared to her. And also a beautiful child." Daniel was crying so hard, letting everything out. Opened the flood gate. Drenching Max's shirt with her tears.

That was a relief. Saying it out loud gave her bruised heart a sense of freedom. Just like how her therapist said 'talking is fixing half of the problem, you can decompress negative emotion by talking'.

"It is not true, Daniel. You are beautiful. You are talented. You are smart."

God, She didn't want it to end. She wanted to buried in Max's arms forever. Enveloped by his perfume and warmth.

"Whoever he is, he'd be so stupid if he missed you."

Daniel let go of her hug. She wiped her face with the sleeve of her shirt. She felt her eyes begin to swell.

"Who's he?"

She was silent.

"Do I know him?"

"I guess."

"Nico?"

"Kevin?"

"Daniil?"

"No, Max. Don't make me say it. Don't make me admit anything, now."

"Daniil?" Max whispered. He was quiet enough as if talking to himself.

"I didn't want him to know. It is so pathetic. I don't want anyone to find it out."

Max just stood there. Eyes focused on his own hand. Deep in his tough, like he was trying to solve this little puzzle.

Daniel needed an escape. "Sorry your shirt got wet. Let me get you a new one. I have an oversized shirt that will fit you." She said in a too happy tone.

Daniel ran to her guest room, where she kept her stash of unsold merch. She should withdraw all of her stock merch when she no longer competing and joined redbull. She took a larger version of the shirt she was wearing. XL, she was hoping it would fit.

It's a little gross not to wash new clothes before wearing them, but bacteria won't survive in that t-shirt. The t-shirt had been stored for more than 1 year, of course no microorganism could survive that long without nutrients.

"Do you have time to wait for me to finish the brownies? Or is Kelly waiting for you and the cat litter?" Daniel gave the shirt to Max.

Max didn't hesitate to change his clothes in front of Daniel. He took off his t-shirt and exposing his slightly golden skin.

Daniel knew that Max always looks handsome when he wears black clothes. But Max wearing daniel's merch which is black? Damn, something churned in Daniel's heart.

"I can stay a little longer. I wonder what your brownies will taste like."

"Daniel, can you change the song. If you keep listening to sad songs like this, your mood will still be sad."

Daniel changed her playlist. She selects a random playlist from her spotify. She returned to mixing the batter and hoped that everything would be better tomorrow.

That day, she booked more appointments with her therapist while eating freshly baked brownies.

[mrs-monaghan]

I just want to say this first before I go off lol. This isn't directed to a certain blog i'm just talking about in general.

i thought to be a jikooker means you support BOTH jimin and jk as individuals first but you also support their relationship as well? like am i missing something? this solo era has really shown people's true colors and it's upsetting that several of these people happen to claim their a jikook supporter yet are doing the complete opposite of what i thought been a jikooker meant. i'm not saying you can't be mad or upset at jimin or jk or like everything they do HOWEVER, lately i have been seeing jikookers that are jm biases (my bias is jimin) saying horrible things about jk and i'm like? why do these people claim they support jikook but only seem to support jimin yet shit on jk.

i have seen some saying that JK is personally responsible for all the sabotage that jimin got/is getting therefore they hate JK now because of that theory. you can't convince me that jk would PURPOSELY do anything to hurt jimin. man couldn't even shoot jimin with fake bullets yet some of yall think that jk just wants USA success therefore he'll hurt his boyfriend to achieve that? make it make sense. if jk really did that don't you think they would of broken up or would of seen their relationship shift? people really think jimin would just stand by and let his boyfriend fuck him over and be okay with it? yall have zero common sense and it shows. jk would literally die before he hurt jimin.

anyways i have had to unfollow a few people because of this. like if you hate jk or think he is purposely hurting and fucking over jimin why do you still call yourself or claim you support jikook? just be a jimin bias and support him.

sorry for that rant shaz i just had to get it all out because it's very upsetting to me that so called jikook supporters are hating jk based on their theories of what they THINK happened/or is happening.

IF YOU THINK JK IS PURPOSELY OR HAS PURPOSELY FUCKED JIMIN OVER BY SABOTAGING HIM WHY WOULD YALL CONTINUE TO SUPPORT JIKOOK AS A COUPLE THEN? that's where i'm confused because if i hated on jimin or jk i wouldn't be a jikooker i would just support them as individuals because if one of the people in the relationship is purposely doing something that's hurting their partner that would be TOXIC and i would never support that.

Oh I am with you

And I refuse to entertain this kind of fuckery. It's one thing to acknowledge the unfairness but it's another to take it out on JK.

And by the way, they are doing all of this not knowing dick about what's really happening behind the scenes. Jimin and JK just renewed their contracts together with the rest. Shouldn't that tell you that you are definitely missing something?????

I, spend no energy being upset because Jimin is still over here supporting JK and joking with and about him on his insta. So their rlship is clearly smooth sailing. And Jimin is all for whatever musical direction his boyfriend is taking.

We are not privy to anything that goes on behind the scenes. At all. As long as this remains the case I see no reason to be wound up.

And yeah, I would absolutely not follow any Jikookers shit talking JK. No thank u. I don't wanna see that shit. They are clearly solos and I want nothing to do with them. You made the right choice my dear.

[hyacinthsdiamonds]

The reason why they don't follow each other lmao, I still cackle thinking of Charles - literally on Max's freaking plane going home to Monaco after Austria 2019 - looking over at Max to see if he noticed that he'd unfollowed him.

(this point from a post of yours btw)

is there any proof to that point? i'm genuinely asking

Hi Anon,

So I don't have any screenshotted proof from this pre & post Austria 2019 era myself, but maybe another blog does (I've only been active myself in f1 tumblr since 2021, despite following the sport my entire life and looking over the tags every so often before setting up my blog here) so I'll throw this in the tags so if someone does have that type of evidence, they can add it here.

Here's what we do know and have evidence for;

We do know that Max and Charles did follow each other on their various social media platforms until circa 2019, as - (if you scroll back far enough) - you can see different interactions between them pre 2019, pre Austria specifically. [Unrelated note: the unhingedness of them and the rest of the then teenaged members of the grid at this point of time is beyond hilarious. Genuinely, if you have the time it's worth the scrolling because they're such teenage boys tm it's ridiculous, and we kinda forget how long their lives have been interconnected, and it's before they got proper pr training and before certain drivers - most recognisably Max - gave their socials to a media team to run. There was a good period of time around 2017/18 when Victoria, his sister, ran his accounts as well as he wanted to include her in his team, before a proper media team took over. Objectively, the idea of Victoria noticing Charles unfollowed Max and then being the one to unfollow Charles in response, while Max remains oblivious to the entire situation is killing me lmao].

Now we do definitely know that they shared the flight home from Austria as during press after the race, Max was asked if things were going to be awkward with Charles now and he was essentially like "??? We're literally sharing a flight home???" This was Max's "It was just an inchident" ngl. Meanwhile, this was Charles on the podium:

... so he certainly did not share the same sentiment. It was his "it's just unfair" era. You can see a clear difference in Charles' driving post Austria, he started taking more risks and was more aggressive afterwards, because he felt if max was allowed to take risks and be aggressive, so was he. In the story of Charles' racing career, Austria 2019 is a significant race in his journey, even though it wasn't the win he wanted it to be. He would win his first two races in the aftermath of it.

It would not be the first or last time Charles would pettily unfollow someone on the grid after feeling he had been dirty by them and/or the FIA. In 2021, he followed every driver on the grid bar Max and would unfollow Valterri after what Charles dubbed the bowling incident in Hungary. While Bottas caused the main chaos of that opening lap, Stroll was the one who actually took Charles out of the race, but Lance has Charles following him as of 2024. Bottas also may have been unfollowed because of his preference of being as little clothed as possible in his insta posts lmao, but Charles did follow him before Hungary 2021 and quickly unfollowed afterwards.

I hope this provides some help, anon. And I'm sorry that I don't have the relevant screenshots to validate and accurately fact check this section of lestappen lore.

[sgiandubh]

Kthxbye

When lurking, you do and you actually should try to have at least an overview of the dialogue dynamics in the different camps of the fandom.

A quick walkthrough of how it shows on an outsider's screen:

Something: happens.

The Shire: who? where? when? why? does it match with what we know? does it make sense? what do you think? aren't we writing the script? will they double down on the narrative? what do you think? is that enough to put it to rest? does it click 100%? who found it? who sent it? who said what? what do you think? is it a good thing? a bad thing? a meh thing? what do you think? did that happen before? you want to go to DMs with that one? what do you think? is it the right time to talk about that? we haven't spoken enough about that, have we? I've just noticed something, what do you think? what do we think?

Mordor: oh God, they are stupid. Nothing there. She said nothing. Who is that one, posting there? What does she want? There is nothing there. God, they are stupid. I've never spoken to that one, but she's a nutcase. Fact. Nothing happened. God, they are stupid. I have it in good faith based on a twitter post from Jakarta with no pics. Yeah, "with family". God, they are stupid. And who is this one? Oh, I know her commas, just took another handle. God, they are stupid. There is nothing there. Nothing happened. I have just called Wakanda Bay Resort, he checked in yesterday. How do shippers mean, resorts don't give these details on the phone? They are stupid. There is this Tick Tock reel by somebody from Oaxaca, they were at the market, no, the person didn't know who he was, but let me post it here. I've chopped it into frames, then watermarked. All rights reserved: it's mine. But can't you see how they can't even stand each other anymore? They have nothing. I've just sent myself an Anon in German, that should be enough facts. Oh, God they are stupid. I am just going to ignore that critical detail, it's not even there, shippers are very sick people. If I just told you so, then this is the truth. I mean, he followed her on Insta, and then unfollowed. Must be love. Must have been love, yeah. But it's over, now. And I don't even watch that shitty show anymore. It's dead. OL is dead. God, they are stupid.

... and so on, and so forth, until the next something happens.

The Shire is what it is, but it is a place of debate. Questions are asked, stones are turned, answers slowly, organically emerge. It can sometimes be a place of suspicion, but how could that be otherwise? After all, this is also the side which has been the most bruised and battered by the narrative itself. One can not and should not expect credulity, here. But kindness, yes. Always.

In Mordor, I have never seen anything else than false premises, a narrative revered North Korean style and little to no questioning, let alone original content.

And then they wonder why people still come here from the outside and stick to this camp. Yeah.

[zukotheartist]

My last post on this (tho ill keep reblogging others' posts) but a few days ago I actually wanted to complain about this and then never did so ill do it now.

I unfollowed Noah a few weeks ago? On insta. And completly forgot that he also has tiktok and that i followed him there so one of his newer videos popped up on my page and it was smth like Eleven dancing in Fortnite and i checked the comments, hoping to see some palestenian flags🇵🇸 or anyone calling him out, but it was FILLED with support for him and "youre back baby🥺" "noah online era again!" "omg ily! Pls say hi to me🥺" and then i opened his full acc and noticed that That recent video was also more viewed and liked than some of his previous videos... all he had to do for so many people to switch up was... post a stupid fucking tiktok about Stranger Things... and just like that he was being idolised again, all it took...

Fucking pathetic and sad.

Love Will Byers all u want (he'll probably always be one of my alltime favourite characters too) but do not hide behind that to support Noah or Brett or Levy or whatever. Theyre awful human beings and they dont care about anyone but themselves. You can love the character and hate the actor. Fanarts and ao3 are free, you dont need to support ST. Pirate the show, make your own merch, only interact with free fanmade content. There's no need to show support for official Stranger Things stuff. Actually, take it a step further and boycott what the bds movement is asking to boycott!

These are the main ones!

But the people, on their own, also started these specific boycotts! (Starbucks too! I was obsessed with pumpkin spice latte but im never stepping foot inside a Starbucks again).

Again, the MAIN TARGETS are the ones inside the first box. The second and third box are about putting PRESSURE on them (ofc we cant boycott google but we Can put pressure) and the last box is the "the people started it on their own without the bds asking" boycotts! Disney and Starbucks (although both missing from the 4th box) are actually part of the "people started/led" boycotts too!

There are also people out there sharing FREE books (online) about Palestine! It's easy to look up but I can send you some if you don't find anything, I'm reading one myself.

There are also essays made by others that summarise specific books!

(Apparently this one also has a voiceover? Not sure bc I still havent checked it out but I saw Multiple people reccomend it and will hopefully get to it soon!)

Last thing: depending on where you live (im not from the US, nor live there, and that's the main genocide supporter) you can also call your representatives, send emails (you can find premade speeches) and go to protests! And most of all, you can share the videos from Palestine! By journalists such as Motaz, Bisam and Plestia.

[kingmagnificoofrosas]

I had to unfollow the Magnifico tag because it got me angry with all the hate there. I hope that you don't get any of this hate because your blog is incredible. You provide a safe place for all of us Magnifico defenders. You also understand that Magnifico is more than a pretty face.

Hi!!!! Oh my goodness, YES!

First of all, thank you very much!! 💙💙💙 Magnifico is so so much more than his handsome outside, exactly!

I was about to say something! ... I came across those posts last night. And while we defenders are by far the majority, growing in number daily, it is still very much unsettling to have such people running around, now not only spreading hate against Magnifico but against me and my fellow defenders personally.

They are brutally ignorant, rude, insensitive and inconsiderate. Clearly, they don't want to understand the reality that even children starting by the age 5 can!

I am 100 % sure, these few haters are the very same persons. Maybe 2 to 4 with several accounts.

It's always the same damn arguments ... and while they don't mention me and Magnificolover personally, their statements go directly against the exact exclaimations we've made and still do. It just doesn't matter to them that especially I and (Magnificolover from Insta and X) have and still are putting hours and hours of effort into our analyses! We've explained most points already to the tiniest details and yet they refuse to understand. They just want to hate!

Sometimes I just wanna

You know? 🤣

But I'm way too nice and I would never do that!! But those haters sometimes truly get my blood boiling!

If they attack me personally, I can delete and block them and forget about it. If they attack my friends and fellow defenders however ... 😬 that strikes a nerve for me .... big time!

They call us insufferable! Excuse me? They are the insufferable ones!

We do nothing but spread love, compassion and forgiveness and call out toxic shit behaviour! Critique, let it be very harsh, still isn't hate! If I call someone ignorant for being ignorant, I am speaking facts, not hate! What are they doing? Spread hate! If we defenders call them and their very wrong statements and behavior out, we are the crazy, creepy and obsessed ones. But they are little sweet angels for insulting us and calling Magnifico all kinds of horrible names, yes?

Yes, he is our precious gem! And we will keep loving and defending him! We will keep making noise! We won't shut up, we won't be silenced!

I am so sorry that some have to unfollow the main hashtag simply because of those few hater trolls.

So let me give you awesome legends a few new hashtags. From now on, you will find all my important posts there to! Let's try and keep them safe and protected together 💙

#justiceformagnifico

#Magnificodeserveslove

[steffigraf]

warning for a clearly anxiety-ridden oversharing freakout below the cut. sorry. i’m too sensitive and i’m unfortunately acutely aware of it.

tldr; im being a drama queen. gonna take a tumblr break for a week or two. to my mutuals, feel free to dm for my insta. i’ll be active until i wake up tomorrow morning and then i’m gonna zip

gonna preface this by saying this is in no way directed to the people whom i actually talk to constantly on here like you lot were lovely and im just dealing with a lot of demons in my head :(

anyway. sometimes i feel more like a product manufacturer than a person on here. and idk. i know most of you guys are really just following me for gifs and content and whatever but. yeah. idk. i guess the things i say don’t matter to anyone unless it’s funny. or if people want to call me out. not that im mad abt that exactly btw i do appreciate when people respectfully call me out for my own mistakes but. sometimes. i feel like im in a fishbowl and you’re all just waiting for me to say something wrong and cancel me. or then again, maybe most of you already think im a shit person and you just stay for the gifs. or maybe you guys think i’m a loser who has nothing to do but spend all day on this goddamn website.

and i know, somewhere inside me, that that’s not true and that it’s clearly the anxiety talking. maybe it’s just me maybe i’m making this up in my head i dunno. but i’m just kinda tired right now. too tired to battle the anxiety like usual at least. and i don’t really feel wanted outside of the content i produce, beyond the notes of my gifs or my fun posts. which ik shouldn’t matter but. i’m a pathological people pleaser etc etc.

(god, seeing this all typed out, i can’t even fucking blame you guys if you actly don’t like me cause. i kinda wanna shake myself by the shoulders and tell myself get a grip girl the world doesn’t revolve around you shut up shut up shut your damn mouth—)

i’ve been trying to manage by unfollowing and blocking a few people (which btw, if i did that to you and we used to be mutuals, it’s probably nothing personal i mostly just kept people i’m a bit closer to). but i’m still not really settled. and considering how i’m posting like every other day about feeling like shit, you guys probably figured that out lmao.

and well. on a separate note. seeing that rat’s name alone is too much for me sometimes. i couldn’t watch his game with carlos. i spent hours in his match with daniil turned away from the television, wearing noise canceling headphones while trying (and failing) to talk myself down from a full blown anxiety attack. i’ve said this before but the way people talk about him, both the fucked up silence and the justified outrage, it reminds me way too much about a family problem i have right now. hits uncomfortably close to home. prior to this i kinda thought i’d made my peace with the whole family situation but no apparently not. had he won the semis, i wasn’t even sure if i would be able to stomach cheering for jannik if it meant having to watch that man play.

so. idk. between the way actual tennis has been making me feel and the way tennisblr in general has seemed for me lately, i figure i need some space.

long story short ive been spending way too much time on tumblr this ao. and its gotten really bad for my mental health i guess. so i think i need to take maybe a week or two, to clear my head. watch tennis without opening this app every other point. spend time with people i love. get back to therapy. try to be a functioning adult.

(this is so fucking dramatic for a goddamn week of no tumblr i know that and i want to smack myself upside the head because why am i like this why do i make things snowball why why why—)

anyway. yeah. that’s it. if you actually read through all of that then. thanks. if not it’s okay too.

to my mutuals, the ones whom i’ve had at least some form of friendly interaction with in replies or dms, you can ask for my insta account btw. not that i’m crazy active on there but like. if you guys wanna be friends beyond the anonymity of this yknow. no pressure though.