#AND I HAVENT A CLUE HOW TO DRAW CARS

[triona-tribblescore]

@onionninjasstuff DTIYS

AYYY!!! CONGRATS ON 3K! :D

the amount I love these evil silly goobers is not normal. they are so devious I just wanna give them all the illegal weaponry they should not have but deserve.

[zmayadw]

Evening to all :)

Time for the next part :)

Have a nice evening :)

CALL OF THE RAVEN

PART 10

I woke up with a terrible taste in my mouth. I had no clue what time was it, but the sun was out already, making me squint my eyes. I got in sitting position slowly, banging in my head intensifing with every move i made. Ugh, i'm never drinking again, i scolded myself. Squinting, I focused on the little alarm clock that was on the night stand. 10.34. Whoa, i cant remember the last time i slept this long. I got up from the bed and went to the bathroom. I filled the glass with wather, rinsing my mouth a few times before gulping down two glasses. My stomach growled at it, i just hoped not to throw up .Taking a shower would be a wise thing to do, so i just threw the clothes i had off and entered the shower. The warm water felt good, i just let it pour over me for a while. I wrapped myself in the towel taking some painkillers for the headache. Getting back to the room, i dressed up, and sat on the bed. I felt a bit better, but still not enough. Coffee, i tought, thats what i need now. I got up, going for the purse i threw on the floor when i got in, searching for my phone. Shit, i cursed, it wsnt there. I checked every pocket, even Jake's hoodie, but my phone was nowhere to be found. Crap, i probably left it at a the Aurora last night, when Jessy and me wer taking pictures. Or at lest i hoped so. Well, i was going for coffee, so i could stop at the Aurora eitherway. I grabbed my backpack with drawing stuff. Who knows, i might be up for some drawing, no matter I still felt woozy from last night drinking. I putted my sneakers on, grabed my stuff and car keys. Walking wasnt an option this time, i wasnt feeling well enough for it.

When i parked my car infront of the Aurora, I saw Dan's car was still there. I smiled as i left the car, guess i wasnt the only one sleeping late today. I hoped Phil was there already, and my phone too. I entered the Aurora, relieved at the sight of Phil behind the bar. I was washed with the smell of coffee, and as i neared the bar, I pleadingly said to him, sitting on the stool „Please, please, please, tell me i'm not wrong and that is coffee i can smell.“ Phil turned arround , not noticing me when i entered. He grinned at me „You are most definitly right! Would you like some?“ „Yes, pretty please.“ I said, as i putted my hand on the bar, and leaned my head on it as on a pillow. Phil chuckled at me „Want any sugar with it? Or milk?“ „Yes, please.“ I replied, and he vanished through the storage doors. He returned with a big cup of coffe putting it infront of me. I rised my head, took the cup, taking a deep breath of its smell, before taking a big sip of it. „Thanks, Phill, you're my saviour:“ i smiled at him as i settled it back on the bar. „Here to help.“ He said, winking. „Rough night?“ he asked teasingly. „Oh, i dont know how you can be so cheerful.“ I started „I feel like a truck hit me lastnight.“ He laughed „Practice to perfection.“ „I think i would need years of practice to be even close to that kind of perfection!“ i said, making a skeptical face. He smiled at me „So, to what do i owe the pleasure?“ he asked. „Dont get me wrong, im glad to see you“ he said, that devilish spark in his eyes again „But i doubt you came just to see me.“ „You caught me.“ I said, even tho it was nice seeing him. „I was hoping that i might have left my phone here yesterday.“ He shook his head at me, crouching down searchin for a few seconds under the bar, giving me my phone as he got up. „Better be carefull next time, good thing i noticed it as you left.“ „Yay, thanks Phil, again.“ I told him, giving him a big smile. „I owe you big time! Both for the phone, and coffee.“ His phone rang then „Sorry business calling. Be right back“ he said, answering his phone and going through the storage door. I checked my phone with him gone, finding out few missed calls and messages from Jessy. She was worried i havent answered her jet, so i decided to call her while waiting for Phil. The tone barely sugested it rang when Jessy's voice boomed from the other side. „Finaly! Do you know how worried i have been? Are you allright? Where wer you? Why didnt you answer me before?“ It made me smile a bit, her worrying for me like that was so sweet. „Im sooooo sorry Jessy“ i said pleadingly „I left my phone at Aurora last night, i just got here to get it.“ Phil returned at that point, and i mouthed to him 'Jessy's' name, indicating who i was talking to. Her voice boomed again, and i moved my phone a bit from my ear, wich made Phil laugh. „Ofcourse you did! Its no wonder after all the whiskey you had! Dan is still sleeping like a log! You two really had it last night!“ „Aww, Dont be cross, Jessy.“ I started pleadingly again „I promise next time we wont over do it.“ Phil was grining at me now, and i stuck my toung at him, trying to calm Jessy down. „C'mon, you cant tell me you didnt have some fun yesterday.“ I started „I have some pictures on my phone as a proof of it.“ Phil threw his thumb up, showing me i said a good thing, and i grined at him. „Alright, i admit last night wasnt all that bad.“ Jessy started, sounding calmer now „But you're still not off the hook completly.“ „Thanks, Jessy“ i started, grining as a sign of victory to Phil. „You can scold me some more at lunch, if the deal for it still stands.“  „Ofcourse!“ Jessy cined cheerfuly from the other side „Dan will be a sleep for God knows how long, and im already bored here.“ I quickly moved my phone from the ear checking the time. „Its 12.20 now, when do you want us to meet?“. „I'll meet you around 14 at the Aurora. I doubt Phil will mind you hanging there with him till then.“ She replied, teasing me. „Somehow i think you're right.“ I said, looking at Phil with a devilysh smile. „Cya later, Jessy.“ I sadi, lovering my phone. Phil looked at me,a bit confused „Wat was that about?“ „Oh, just Jessy being Jessy.“ I told him, grining. „Fine, fine, be all mysterious.“ He teased me. „Awww, c'mon, you wouldnt find me so interesting if i was an open book.“ I told him, smiling sheepeshly. He looked at me, with that intensifing look again, making me feel heat spreading through my body „You're not wrong about that.“ Crap, what are you doing again, Maya, i scolded myself. Phil was definatly into me, and i was toying with him like this. It really wasnt my intention, i didnt want him to get the wrong impression about anything. But it felt so easy for me, talking to Phil, compared to Jake. Why does all have to be so tough and complicated with him? It feels like walking on egg shells every time im with him: dont do this, dont say that. Shit, it shouldnt be that way, should it? Was i really that much into Jake? Blah, i dont know anything anymore. I wish he would be more open with me, it would make things so much easier. I was lost in my toughts when Phil finaly snaped me back to reality „Maya? You allright?“ I looked at him, shaking my head,  to clear it from all the 'Jake' toughts. „Yeah, sorry.“ I started „Guess the coffee didnt kick in properly yet.“ Phil looked at me, and i could see he didnt really belive what i told him, but decided not to take the matter any further „If you say so.“ Was all he said. I smiled shyly at him. „Do you mind if i just hang here for an hour or so, before metting with Jessy? I dont feel up to driving back to motel, and the coffee isnt bad here either.“ I tried, smiling, waving my empty cup at him. Phil looked at me, rising one of his eyebrows, and smiled devilishly „How could i say no to a beautifull woman?“ He took my cup, winked at me vanishing through the storage doors. I could feel my cheeks flushing again, and my heart beating faster. Shit, shit, shit..

When Phil came back with another full cup of coffee i asked if its ok if I sit at one of the booths, to wich he said  fine, since he did have some work to be done. I took my stuff and coffee setteling at the booth. I had a bit over an hour before metting with Jessy, i hoped some inspiration for work might come to me. I took my stuff out of the backpack, took my sneakers off, sitting with my feet up on the booths perch. I liked drawing like that. Leaning my drawing pad on my knees i tried to focus on my work, but my toughts just kept wondering off.  I tought about Phil, sneaking glances towards the bar. He was good looking, always nice to me, even tho everyone warned me that he was a 'no good' considering women. He never showed any sign of it towards me. He was easygoing, i enjoyed his company, we definatly clicked. Then there is Jake. I was definatly drawn to him, cant deny that. When im near him, it feels like when a moth is drawn towards fire. Cant fight it, its driving me crazy. But nothing with him is easy. Its like taking one step forward, then not one, or even two, but ten steps back. Its so frustrating. And with all that had happened, i feel like all the progres we had was completly gone. My head was still too woozy for thinking of stuff like this. I setteled my drawing stuff down, taking my coffee, leaning back in the booth. Maybe Jessy would have some advice fore me. Two heads are smarter then one, or so they say. But i should definatly talk to Phil, at least try to explain things to him. I dont want him thinking im giving him some false hope here. As if he could sense my toughts, he turned around, took his coffee and walked towards me. „Mind if i join you?“ he asked, and i smiled „Ofcourse i dont. I guess my inspiration is still sleeping, so no work to be done at the moment.“ He grined „Thats good for me. I can have the pleasure of your company for some more then.“ I chuckled at that, siping some more of the coffee. But i tought again about talking with him about everything.  My face must have gotten some serious expression, 'couse Phil looked at me a bit serious, before asking „Whats bothering you, Maya? I have a feeling you want to talk to me about something.“ I looked at him, those deep eyes of his gazing intensly at me, trying to dig up my toughts. „I do.“ I admitted after a moment „But to be hones, i dont know how to start .“ „Well, just do your best.“ He said, and i started to get the feeling of a knot at my stomach again. „Allright.“ I said, but the words didnt come easy after that. „I like you, Phill.“ I said finaly after a moment of silence. He chuckled „Ok, thats a good start.“ „Ah, but that was the easy part.“ I started „Now comes the tricky one.“ I could notice him tensing a bit, like he knew where this might lead to. „Ok, go on then.“ He said. „I enjoy your company, talking to you, its so easygoing. I feel we clicked, that theres some 'spark' between us, and i know you noticed the same.“  „You're right about that.“ He replied. „But..“ i started, and Phil interupted me, sighing „Ahh, there it is, the famous 'but' part.“ „Please, Phil, just let me say what i have, then you can hate me.“ He looked at me, his face getting a soft touch „I couldnt hate you, Maya.“ „Dont say it untill im not done talking.“ I said, a bit sadness creeping to my voice. „Alright. Please, continue.“ „Ok. As i started earlier,i like you, but i dont want to get your hopes up.“ I settled my coffe on the table, my hands fidgeting with the cup. Why was this so hard? „Shit, Phil, im a complete mess at the moment.“ I started „I myself dont know what i want, and its tearing me up inside. There is someone, and i dont know where I stand with him. And i dont want to start something new, if im not a 100% sure that its the right thing, that its something i really want. With no loose ends catching up on me.“ I looked up at Phil, him still not taking his eyes off me. „Am i making any sense to you here?“ i asked, lovering my head. I really didnt want to have this conversation, but that was me being honest. All of a sudden, i could feel Phil's hand covering mine, and i looked back up at him. He still had that softness written all over his face. „I appriciate your honesty, Maya.“ He started „Now let me be honest also.“ „Ofcourse“ i said „I expect nothing less.“ „Good.“ He looked at me more serious now. „You know i like you, you said it yourself. I dont know why, but i felt drawn to you the moment i saw you. Theres something in you that makes a man bedazled by you, i cant explain it differently.“ He paused for a moment before continuing. „And i get it, you dont want to get into something half hearted. And i applaud you for that. Because, if anything was to happen between us, i wouldnt want it that way either.“ He looked at me now, his gaze intensifing again, and i started to feel that heat again. „If it was to happen“ he continued „I would prefere if you wer in it with every inch of your body and soul.“ I was mesmerized by his words. He was so open with me, the words came so easy to him. Why cant it be like this with Jake. „Allrighty, that was pretty honest there.“ I said finaly, making an aqward smile. „You wanted me to be honest.“ He said, adding „And just so you know, im not going to make it easy for you.“ He looked at me now, with that devilish spark in his eyes again. I looked at him puzzled „What do you mean by it?“ He grined at me „Its like this: i will continue to act like i did so far, and you can do the same, cause, lets face it, we both like it.“ His grin widened, and i smiled back at him. „Good, you get me. But, until i get a confirmation from you about freely taking it a step further, i will do whatever i can to maybe, just maybe, help you feel a bit less messy and steer thigs in my favore.“ „And what if it wont end as you hope it would? Can you be ok with just being my friend?“ i asked him. He looked at me for a moment, before answering. „Honestly“ he started“i cant say i wouldnt be dissapointed, a little hearth broken probably, but i would respect your choice. And yes, Maya, if that would be so, i would gladly be just your friend.“ “Thanks, Phil, i appriciate all you said.“ I told him „I was kinda affraid of having this conversation with you.“ „You, affraid? I cant belive that“ he said, teasingly „Belive me, i was scared as hell.“ I said, adding to it „But im glad we had it. I didnt want it to become aqward between us at some point.“ „Not gonna happen.“ He said, winking at me. I smiled „Shit, you know, even thou i had enough yesterday, i could actualy use a drink right now.“ Phil lughed so hard „Awww, you really did get scared. We are in a bar afterall, you just say the words and ill bring you that drink.“ He said, looking at me with one raised eyebrow. „Only if you join me“ i said, grining at him „ And if you dont tell Jessy about it.“ He got up from the booth, smiling and winking before he left for the bar „Deal!“

[hawtdawgblog]

well shit

i guess its true what they say, life aint sunshine and rainbows all of the time

i thought this year would be more different, maybe even better than 2020. instead, its more or less the same, possibly worse

its almost the end of the school year, and it also means its the end of high school for me (im a senior), if thats even the case. i have absolutely no idea what to do after high school, should i go to college or university? maybe move to a different city? maybe learn how to drive a car and maybe get a job? all of those things have been plaguing my mind lately, and me turning 18 this january didnt help AT ALL.

i havent been to good at school because im not used to virtual learning, i used to be so good at school because it was in person, my grades were actually decent, but now, it seems that i have given up...im not even sure if im able to graduate this year because of my abysmal marks...im isappointing my parents...they are going to realize they have just raised a high school dropout...

another thing thats been bothering me is that i have just realized i may have wasted some of the best years of my life in my (high) school years. i never really went to dances, proms, or any school events because i thought they were a waste of time. looking back at it now, ive now regretted my decisions and i want to turn back time...

on a related note, now that im now an adult legally, past memories and episodes of nostalgia have been affecting me for some time now. this is not new to me, its just been more intensified than ever. and that is one of the few reasons why i havent been myself mentally and emotionally. i just wanna go back to the late 2010s, i know there have been a few bad memories here and there, like the times where i got teased back in my freshman years. but those things are no match for the positive memories i had back then. like watching animation memes on a hot summers day at a friends house in 2018, or watching eitherdane powrozniks starters series or nemaos HTF: Still Alive vids on youtube in 2016-7. even old memes like "This is mine" or "get out of my car" and others bring me sadness and nostalgia.

even further back, sometimes i wish i were a teen in the late 2000s. life was so simple back then, everyone looked like they had a good time, sure maybe some of the technology is limited, and i might type this on a chunky laptop or macbook if i were a teen back then, but that being said, i kinda envy those that lived their teen years in that era. yeah i was alive then, but i was a small child :P i barely remember anything back then lmao.

still, i remember somethings in the early 2010s, like watching AO and YTPs or listening to pokemon ost. i would either go to OneMoreLevel to play flash games, or go to DragoArt to learn how to draw.

all of this makes me sad and even cry a little. i was so happy and carefree, i didnt care what others think, i was having the time of the life, i wish i could do that as of now...

its now 2021, and i just want to cry in my sleep, i wanna get of this conservative hell hole town, but i dont have any money, i low key want to go to a higher education, but i dont know what school to go to. should i get a full time job, or do art as a living? THE POSSIBLITIES ARE OCCUPYING MY MIND AND I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT TO DO.

im so exhausted, but i need to get this thing off of my chest. adulthood is crazy and i absolutly have no clue what to do. and these feelings i have are not helping...

[kissryuwuji]

ok so i have no clue how to send the song things like you did so i’m just going to tell you some of the songs i’ve been listening to, uh but it is not as upbeat as your stuff give us a little love —fallulah i can’t handle change —roar you know it —colony house replay —lady gaga feel something —bea miller take a walk —passion pit daddy issues —the neighbourhood crush —tessa violet play with fire —sam tinnesz DREAMERS is also vv good too imo, then all the other songs on my tag game are good! ily

Lee!!! Ehrjfuucifirejdjjxicjjcirjjejwjsnndnckgiriieiwjenndjfirr thats how long it took me to calm down LOL also for inserting music into the ask, u gotta update the app which i admit is a pretty damn cool feature but adding tags is sTILL WONKERS alsO ALSo its ok i listen to a lot of depressing sounding music anyway lmao

Ok i love the instrumental and tempo on this and i wrote a whole paragraph abt this but it did not save in my drafts 🤡 i love her voice and the song!!!

First off i relate to this title and its lyrics LOL love the instrumental build up and reminds me a bit of hippo campus's newer songs (and some other band too buT IDR WHICH) so yeah id hum along to this when im drawing bc its just such a nice song man idk i feel like u just get me

COLONY HOUSE!!!! I recognize them uh ok as u can see im that person who will b like i listen to this band but really only know one of their songs LOL i love their song silhouette so yeah i love this too ofc

Replay

Omg lady gaga 😳 i havent listened to her since idk telephone i forgot how good her music is omg i couldnt stop smiling listenibg tk this bc of the sheer thought of it being lady gaga LANDNXJFB def sharing this w my sis so we can jam to it in the car

This song did in fact make me feel smth 🤧 u just reminded me of like how good female artists are like ive been deprived of their works anyway idk how to describe it but im obviously listening to this again LOL

aGAINNNNN the instrumental !!! His singing is good too i just like it im adding this to my car playlist (haha get it im not gonna explain bc i tried and it sounded dumb)

I admit this is the second song ive heard from the neighborhood besides sweater weather LOL i do be liking this tho 😳 the beat and tempo are so nice

Omg this song,,,,so cute,,,, could not stop bopping my head to it no words needed but ok this brought me back to pre teen yrs LOL

Whoa this gave me imagine dragon vibes i love this and the back up vocals but also why does it feel like u took a peak into my 6th grade plalist omg

DREAMERS DJDJFJCJR I LOVE THEM TOO my fav songs r die happy and fake it til u make it and teddy bear and thats what i can think of rn LOL

Ok i noticed the reviews were getting shorter but i didnt want to repeat but just know i added all these songs to my playlists and i love them 😌 omg also i love that u sent songs uve been recently listening to bc the songs i sent were also songs ive recently listening to too (except careless whispers) LMAO might send u my fav throwback songs tho

[dylinski]

do 1-100, coward

I AM NO COWARD

anyone who actually reads through all this, god bless you. you can blame leigh @thessaia, i give you full authority.

1. Spotify, SoundCloud, or Pandora?

of those three, pandora. although, i prefer apple music.

2. is your room messy or clean?

LMFAO. CLEAN? I DON’T KNOW HER

3. what color are your eyes?

brown, but they’re lighter than that in the right light. almost a caramel with a dark chocolate ring on the outside.

4. do you like your name? why?

yeah, i don’t mind it. its always been there. lol i mean i used to have different nicknames or pretend to be other people. idk i told my parents when i was like five i was going to change my name to Felicia Franchesca Sarahmichelle Lynn. don’t ask. in fifth grade (before dylan o’brien was even famous) i begged my parents to call me dylan and refused to respond to any other name for like a year. also, don’t ask.

5. what is your relationship status?

single as dingle

6. describe your personality in 3 words or less

CHAOTIC, SMARTASS, STABBY

7. what color hair do you have?

answered

8. what kind of car do you drive? color?

kia forte, although my dad calls it an orte since the “f” is missing. funny story, i  got pulled over and gave the dude my license and registration and shit but apparently, he didn’t look at it cause he put on the warning “orte” which i promptly laughed my ass off to. if he had given me a ticket i could have absolutely fought that bitch in court in won. SIR I DO NOT DRIVE AN ORTE. IS THAT ITALIAN? DO I LOOK LIKE I CAN AFFORD AN ITALIAN CAR? I DRIVE A FORTE SIR.

9. where do you shop?

ONLINE

10. how would you describe your style?

very idgaf

11. favorite social media account

tumblr

12. what size bed do you have?

full, it takes up my entire room so i couldn’t go bigger if i wanted to

13. any siblings?

answered

14. if you can live anywhere in the world where would it be? why?

uk, always wanted to live there idk

15. favorite snapchat filter?

idk what its called but it has this higher temperature tone to it and gives me cute little freckles

16. favorite makeup brand(s)

i don’t wear make up, i used to use stilla (i think that’s how its spelled)

17. how many times a week do you shower?

i usually shower like every other day unless its hotter than a pair of saggy tits

18. favorite tv show?

that changes with the weather tbh. i can’t say i really have one. for a really long time it was supernatural though.

19. shoe size?

womans 11.5 (us) i think its a men’s 9?

20. how tall are you?

5′ 3″ or 160cm

21. sandals or sneakers?

sneakers. god i hate sandals.

22. do you go to the gym?

uh, no.

23. describe your dream date

answered

24. how much money do you have in your wallet at the moment?

thats funny cause normally i don’t carry cash but i actually have $20 atm

25. what color socks are you wearing?

im not wearing any atm

26. how many pillows do you sleep with?

answered x2

27. do you have a job? what do you do?

not technically? i’m an hourly temp but i hardly get any hours since i cover for the full-time employee.

28. how many friends do you have?

irl: 0    online: too many to count

29. whats the worst thing you have ever done?

oh god, i honest to god have no fucking clue. i don’t think about this stuff. i’ve done some stupid ass shit but my short term and long term memory are both shot to tits.

30. whats your favorite candle scent?

i think i answered this one for a different ask game. i hate most fragrances and artificial smells, even non-artifical ones. i got a sensitive sniffer. im chill with like vanilla though if its not too intense.

31. 3 favorite boy names

Dylan (not even cause dylan i’ve just always liked the name idk why), Jeremy, Jacob (the other two are random)

32. 3 favorite girl names

i know these are random as fuck, but i’ve always liked them so shoot me.

Andromeda, Persephone, Franchesca

33. favorite actor?

i like a lot of actors, way too many to fucking name and remember off the top of my noggin. for sanity’s sake, we’ll say dylan.

34. favorite actress?

god, again way too many to count. i can’t even think of any right now even though i know i have some. lets say Emily Hampshire

35. who is your celebrity crush?

answered36. favorite movie?

answered37. do you read a lot? whats your favorite book?

i would love to read but my adhd makes it really hard to concentrate. i’ll have periods of time where i’ll read a bunch its insane and then i’ll just kind of stop for a while idk. i always loved because of win-dixie or a wrinkle in time, bridge to terabithia, and american assassin.

38. money or brains?

brains, then you can work for the money and you know shit

39. do you have a nickname? what is it?

sawahbwear, sassafras, whiskey, sar

40. how many times have you been to the hospital?

good lord, i don’t even know. way too many. definitely more than ten.

41. top 10 favorite songs

answered42. do you take any medications daily?

not anymore, i kept forgetting to take them so it fucked me up not being on a regular dosage so i just stopped taking all of them.

43. what is your skin type? (oily, dry, etc)

see, im weird af. cause like my skin is oily af, but also fucking dry and i have shitty eczema 44. what is your biggest fear?

answered45. how many kids do you want?

idfk. i mean for as long as i can remember i always wanted them, but tbh idk if im the type of person to have any…

46. whats your go to hair style?

messy bun

47. what type of house do you live in? (big, small, etc)

small, row house

48. who is your role model?

dont have one.

49. what was the last compliment you received?

probably from michelle i think, or alaina. idk i don’t keep track. unless you consider kiana calling me insane a compliment. 🤷‍♀️

50. what was the last text you sent?

“thankies”

51. how old were you when you found out santa wasn’t real?

tbh, i don’t think i ever thought he was real…pretty sure i could put in time out in preschool for making a kid cry cause i told them leprechauns weren’t real either.

52. what is your dream car?

mustang or challenger

53. opinion on smoking?

conflicted

54. do you go to college?

disappointingly

55. what is your dream job?

no clue

56. would you rather live in rural areas or the suburbs?

rural, but still close enough to shit it doesn’t take me an hour to go places.

57. do you take shampoo and conditioner bottles from hotels?

haven't been to a hotel in a long ass time. i do but i never use them.. FREE SHIT

58. do you have freckles?

yeah, but you can’t see them unless i’ve been outside in the sun all day for hours.

59. do you smile for pictures?

relatively

60. how many pictures do you have on your phone?

5604

61. have you ever peed in the woods?

yup, and in a parking lot, and in public.🤙

62. do you still watch cartoons?

i hardly watch tv anymore, but if i did, fuCK YEAH

63. do you prefer chicken nuggets from Wendy’s or McDonalds?

WNEDYS ALL DAY ERRY DAY THE RED HEADED BITCH IS MY HOE OKAY

64. Favorite dipping sauce?

ew, no.

65. what do you wear to bed?

tshirt

66. have you ever won a spelling bee?

answered

67. what are your hobbies?

writing, coding, listening to music??, reading

68. can you draw?

NOPE

69. do you play an instrument?

also no

70. what was the last concert you saw?

like two years ago, circa survive with thrice and a third band idr

71. tea or coffee?

neither

72. Starbucks or Dunkin Donuts?

neither

73. do you want to get married?

idk

74. what is your crush’s first and last initial?

DO

75. are you going to change your last name when you get married?

idk, part of me wants to but most of me doesnt want to

76. what color looks best on you?

i look good in all colors except white.

77. do you miss anyone right now?

yeah

78. do you sleep with your door open or closed?

closed cause i still live at home 😖 but if i didnt probably open so my cat could come and go as he pleased

79. do you believe in ghosts?

ghosts, no. spirits, yes.

80. what is your biggest pet peeve?

answered

81. last person you called

my dad

82. favorite ice cream flavor?

mint choco chip

83. regular oreos or golden oreos?

damn, regular.

84. chocolate or rainbow sprinkles?

RAINBOW BITCHES

85. what shirt are you wearing?

supernatural. dean and sam with baby

86. what is your phone background?

mitch rapp

87. are you outgoing or shy?

im an ambivert

88. do you like it when people play with your hair?

FUCKING YES

89. do you like your neighbors?

the ones on the right are bearable and the ones on the left can fuck off with their insane semen demons

90. do you wash your face? at night? in the morning?

neither, but i should.

91. have you ever been high?

nope

92. have you ever been drunk?

answered

93. last thing you ate?

hot dog

94. favorite lyrics right now

answered

95. summer or winter?

fall

96. day or night?

night

97. dark, milk, or white chocolate?

dark

98. favorite month?

umm, august? idk

99. what is your zodiac sign

aquarius

100. who was the last person you cried in front of?

i don’t remember, it’s been a really long time since i cried in front of someone.

[chatnoirismycinnamonroll]

Do Faeries exist? Part 2

7:15 am

'I don't want to get up today.'

"Marinette! Wake up, you're going to be late for school!"

Marinette grumbled as she squinted at her alarm clock. What was the use of living across the school, where her parents could see her classmates walking by, if they still woke her up late because they forgot she also went to school?

She only had half an hour to get ready and reach her homeroom (Bustier, again), but knowing her parents, theyd want to give her a "pep talk" that only repeated the same words every year and wasnt the least bit encouraging. It would also make her about one or two minutes late, but that was actually a bit of a blessing.

Marinette chose the same style of outfit that was branded with her signature pink flowers. Pink, white, and black. Her favorite combination of colors. She wore a pair of pink capris pants with a white shirt that had a diagonal flower pattern across her chest covered by a black overshirt, sleeves rolled up to her elbows to draw attention to the pink and white polka-dotted inner lining that tied together well with her pink and white flats. Looking at the clock, she barely managed to get her hair into twin tails before rushing downstairs for a quick breakfast.

She followed the same script they spoke every year, and zoned her mother out as, yet again, her nerves kicked in to create a mess of her breakfast. Her parents called her clumsy, but Marinette knew she had anxiety and stress. And it always kicked in at the worst of times and made her nerves act up, causing her hands or knees to shake, her limbs to flail in panic at nothing, and her mind to struggle to make coherent sentences. Chloe wasnt the only direct reason Marinette arrived from school most days with fresh bruises. Her mind was just always busy, whether by coming up with exaggerated worst-case scenarios or trying to go over every little thing she had done that day or trying to remind her of every little thing she had yet to do. It was exhausting.

She snapped to attention as her mother took away the chocolate powder container from her hands, and sighed dejectedly as she grabbed an apple from the knocked-over bowl of fruit. With a simple "Goodbye" and "I love you", Marinette headed down into the bakery to greet her father. He almost bumped into her, but set her upright and gave her a box of macarons "for her friends in class" before giving her a kiss on the cheek and sending her on her way. He walked back into the depths of the bakery before she could say goodbye.

'I dont even have any friends to share this with. Plus, I doubt theyd survive with Chloe around. With my luck, theres no way Chloe isnt in my class.'

She walked out the door and stood at the corner light. Her eyes were focused on the school doors, where she could already see Chloe sauntering in with her lackey, Sabrina, scurrying behind her. The light was still red, but her eyes focused as she noticed movement on the road ahead of her. An old man was crossing the street while the light was red.

There was a red car speeding into the lane. Her eyes darted from the car, to the man, and back. Her mind was racing, obviously seeing what might happen if the old man didnt finish crossing in the next three...

Her feet moved....

Two...

Her hands grabbed the man....

One...

She launched herself backwards, pulling the old man with her. Her heart was racing in her chest, and her mind was just focused on the car speeding past where they had been less than a second ago. What the hell had she just done?

She looked around her, her mind in hyperfocus. The light turned green, and people walked across without a care. They didnt bother to help her or the old man up. It seemed they hadnt noticed what had happened, what she had done.

She turned to the old man, who was struggling to get up. Absentmindedly, she helped him up, gathering her macarons in the process. The box was crushed, and some had fallen out, but the old man was safe. He looked up to thank her, but her mind became distracted by another sound.

The school bell. She had to hurry. She turned to the old man and rushed to say, "I hope you're okay, I have to get going, I'm late. Watch out for cars next time!" Darting across the crosswalk, Marinette missed the look the old man gave her, her mind racing with thoughts.

'That man could have died.'

'I could have died.'

'Why did I do that?'

'I need to be more careful.'

'I'm late, what will Bustier say?'

'Chloe's probably going to make fun and see the crushed macarons.'

'Why didnt I throw them away? I know nobody is going to take them, especially not now!'

She raced up the stairs and into Bustier's classroom, her feet catching on the doorstep as she saw Chloe in what was, technically, her spot for the last three years, and making her faceplant onto the floor. She mentally groaned as that high pitched laugh rang out from her seat.

She looked over at Bustier, but she had turned around to write on the board, her tense shoulders being the only clue that she knew what Chloe was doing. 'Typical.'

She took a deep breath and pushed herself up. She gathered whatever courage she had and headed in Chloe's direction. She was going to end this today. This wasnt going to be like the other years-

"What do you want, Dupain-Cheng?"

-If only her anxiety could let her actually do something. Still, she tried to push past it.

"That's my seat, Chloe."

"Not anymore, it isnt. You see, my Adrikins is coming to school today for the first time ever and I NEED to sit close to him! And he is way more handsome and important than you will ever be!"

"That has been my seat for the past three years, Chloe!"

"So what? It's not my fault that after three years you still havent put your name on it. Because I certainly dont see it. Why dont you sit over there with the new loser and stop trying to raise yourself to my level because you're never going to get there."

Anger. Frustration. Embarrassment. She could feel everybody else looking away from her, while simultaneously looking at her. Why couldnt she saying anything? Why couldnt she react the way she knew she could? Why was she actually walking down those stairs to her, ugh, new seat? Why was it always the same thing every year?

"Hey, dont listen to her. Girls like her never get anywhere in life on their own. Sooner or later, someone good will defeat the evil within her."

Marinette stared into chocolate brown eyes. Who was this girl? "Evilness within her?"

"Yeah, like how a superhero always defeats the supervillain. Bullies like her always get brought down eventually." The girl smiled, hope shining in the darkness of her eyes.

Marinette, despite dreading the fact that this girl was up for a terrible year, couldnt help but smile. There was just something about this girl that gave a person confidence, but Marinette knew it wouldnt last. Soon, she, too, would falter to Chloe's ways and ignore Marinette to avoid being a target.

Bustier turned around and began the class, ignoring Chloe's protests because her "precious Adrikins" hadnt arrived yet. Of course, this only caused Chloe to huff and glower through the entire morning. Marinette was distracted by the girl beside her.

"Hey, are those macarons?"

"Hmm? Oh, yeah. They got a bit crushed this morning, tho, so they dont look like much."

"Are you kidding? I bet they taste fantastic! Can I have one?"

Marinette had her doubts. She didnt want to encourage this girl, especially since it only meant heartbreak for Marinette in the end, but she supposed it wouldnt hurt for today.

"Yeah, sure. I'm Marinette."

"Alya."

Yeah, it probably wouldnt hurt to enjoy this while it lasted.

---------------------------

So, part 2 is done! I am drawing this out as much as I can, but I think it's coming about nicely. If anybody wants to be tagged, just ask and I will tag you!

Here is the tag list so far:

@ozmav @ginamariepotterhead @maddrag

Hope you guys like it!

Edit, because I forgot to put the tags for this.

[shookethbrooketh]

schrödinger’s cat

phil tried to take a deep breath, but he couldn’t manage. he tried to calm down, but the truth of the matter was that anything could have happened. there could have been a bombing, and the world around him could already be descending into war. It was schrödinger's cat; he had no memory of what had happened, and therefore everything, including the possible worst case scenario, had happened until he knew otherwise.

summary: it’s july of 2019, and dan and phil are headed to vidcon. everything has been absolutely amazing for the two of them since they ended their hiatus, and they’re ready to jump into the next stage of their lives...until a reckless driver destroys everything they had in store. suddenly phil is left completely alone to cope with the loss of his soulmate, and all he has left is the dark void of his own mind. dan’s the only thing that can help him, and he’ll find him, even if he has to get some wings first. 

genre: realism gone wrong, angst

warnings: major character death, suicide, car accident, hospital/doctors, funeral

word count: 4.6k

written for the @phandomreversebang ! inspired by the lovely art by @penisdinosaur ! beta’d by @i-havent-slept-in-days !

a/n: this fic is, by no means, meant to glorify suicide. however, it is quite dark especially near the ending, and the outlined way of thinking is EXTREMELY dangerous and unhealthy, so if you think that by any means this story may trigger you, PLEASE don’t read it!! i don’t want anyone to get hurt by my writing <3 please please please use discretion !! 

read it on ao3!

“Hurry up, Phil! We’re gonna miss ANOTHER flight!” Dan called from down the stairs. They were on their way to VidCon, and they didn’t want a repeat of the last time they flew out to Cali in 2017.

“Just our luck with Cali, I suppose,” Phil said, finally running from his room, suitcase dragging behind him, and planting his feet beside Dan’s. 

“You’re ready now? Haven’t forgotten your passport?” Dan asked.

“I think I should be asking you that one,” Phil said. Each of them pulled their passports from their pockets, clinked them like wine glasses, and headed for the stairs. The rush for the airport gate had already begun; Phil didn’t doubt that this would be another incident in which they barely caught the plane. He’d lost track of the times he and Dan had run up to a gate while it was closing, like in the movies. It was certainly anxiety-inducing, but the two of them were fairly calm. They’d had a great break from working hard on YouTube, but there were certainly some things about it that they’d missed, so they were excited to get back to public life. Meeting fans was one of the things they’d missed the most, so VidCon was a great start. 

When they finally reached the pavement outside their flat, Phil took one look at the taxi waiting for them and realized he’d forgotten his phone charger. “Shit!” he shouted, dropping his suitcase, turning on his heel, and making his way back to the flat.

 Behind him, Dan did a double take before groaning and following him. “What now?” 

“I forgot my charger! Why’d you follow me anyway? You could have stayed downstairs,” he said as he reached the door. He felt frantically around his pockets before turning to Dan, who was daintily holding the keys to the flat on one finger. 

“If I thought you’d have remembered your keys, I’d be kidding myself.” By now the taxi driver downstairs was viciously honking at them to hurry up, and both of them knew they were nearing the point of abandonment.

“This is NOT the time!” Phil replied, disappearing into the flat. He came out a moment later holding both Dan’s keys and his own, and, of course, his charger. 

They barrelled down the stairs, each of them nearly falling multiple times, and finally reached the bottom, out of breath after their third trip. Without pausing to talk, they grabbed their luggage and dashed outside. They hadn’t noticed until then that the honking had ceased, but it was clear why; another couple had gotten into their taxi, and it was driving back into traffic. 

“Oh, you have got to be shitting me!” Dan shouted, throwing his keys on the ground. 

Phil calmly bent down and picked them up, handing them back to him before pulling out his own phone. “I’ll call for an Uber,” Phil said dejectedly. Missing the cab was new territory, even for them. 

Luckily, the Uber arrived only a few minutes later, and they were optimistic about catching their plane. Their first event was a little earlier this year, so they certainly didn’t have time to catch another. They threw their things into the trunk and clambered into the Uber, panting a bit as they settled in. “Heathrow,” Phil spat out, and the driver took off. They leaned back against the seats and each took a deep breath. 

“Hey,” Dan said, “we’re gonna make it. Now’s our time to just rest.” They brushed their hands against one another and glanced up at the driver; they knew there was a certain amount of caution to be taken when out in public, even if with only one other person. 

When they looked up, they saw the driver applying lipstick in her mirror. They exchanged concerned looks, and Phil’s entire soul filled with anxiety as he sunk back so far into his seat that he felt as if he was going to disappear. 

“Uh, ma’am?” Dan spoke up shakily, leaning from the passenger side over to her seat. “Are you sure you’re able to drive safely while you’re doing that?” 

“Don’t worry about it,” she said carelessly while nearly running a red light. The light luckily turned green the moment she reached it, but it was clear that she wasn’t intending to stop. 

“I’m not completely su-” 

“Listen, bub,” she said, turning back to look at him, “I know how to drive a damn car.” 

She continued on as the two of their mouths fell wide open. “Oh my God, keep your eyes on the road!” Phil shouted. His breathing began to speed up, and it was evident that he would have a breakdown if something wasn’t done. 

Dan immediately took notice. “Phil, are you okay?” he said quietly enough that she couldn’t hear.

“I’m a professional!” she yelled back, drawing both their attention, and it seemed there was nothing they could to do prevent the screaming match that had commenced. 

Phil turned his head back to face Dan, sporting a face of helplessness. Quickly, though, his eyes caught the movement behind him. They had entered another intersection, and a car was headed right for them. “Dan!” 

~~~

Phil’s eyes blinked open to a sterile, dark, and empty room. He looked around for a moment, confused, and suddenly bolted upright. “Shit!” His hands immediately flew to his head. “Ah!” His head felt as if so much blood was rushing to it that it was going to explode. He slowly laid back into his bed and fumbled around for the bed’s remote; he finally found it, head throbbing, and pushed the call button. 

Within a few seconds, a nurse was in his room. “Oh, good, you’re awake,” he whispered. 

“Why-Ow!” Phil winced as he tried to speak before giving up. “What the hell kind of hangover is this?” he whispered. 

“It’s not a hangover; you have a concussion.” He looked at Phil’s face and sighed. “You don’t remember, do you?” 

Phil tried to think, but it only worsened his headache. “We were going to VidCon. What happened? We’re supposed to be in America. We… Where’s Dan?”

The nurse pursed his lips. “Your family should be here soon.” 

“What-” he whisper-screamed, but the nurse was leaving. “Hey!” he used a normal voice, and his head was throbbing, but he didn’t care. “What the hell is that supposed to mean?” he shouted, but to no avail. The nurse was gone, and his heart was pounding just as hard as his head. What had happened to them? 

He closed his eyes and tried to think back to whatever accident must have happened to land him in that bed. They were taking a cab to VidCon. No, they were taking an Uber. They missed the cab. In any other circumstance, Phil would have laughed at their mistake. Now, it felt like a clue in a murder case. 

They were in the Uber, and that was where the story ended. It was as if he just passed out and somehow ended up in the hospital. His memory flat lined in the middle of the London streets, and everything was completely normal. That, though, couldn’t possibly be true; if it was, Dan would be standing beside him and holding his hand. 

One of the most troubling parts, at that point, was that his memory was failing him. Phil knew there was more to the story, but he couldn’t remember it. Tragedy had struck, and he didn’t even know how. He couldn’t even manage to remember something that he could tell deep down had changed his life forever. 

Phil tried to take a deep breath, but he couldn’t manage. He tried to calm down, but the truth of the matter was that anything could have happened. There could have been a bombing, and the world around him could already be descending into war. It was Schrödinger's Cat; he had no memory of what had happened, and therefore everything, including the possible worst case scenario, had happened until he knew otherwise. Tears he didn’t take notice of rolled down his cheeks, and the heart monitor beside him sped up with each breath. 

At that moment, Phil’s parents rushed in, with his brother Martyn in tow. They saw him panicking and Martyn shouted, “Phil, are you okay?” 

Suddenly everything around him slowed to a stop. His brother’s words reverberated in his head until the voice changed to Dan’s. He closed his eyes, and he saw the inside of a car. He saw a driver, one who chose to look back at them rather than driving. He heard screaming, and every bit of it shot pain through his head, but he couldn’t even think of pulling himself out of what he could only describe as his nightmare. He turned to Dan, and the two made eye contact. They were both hopeless, stuck in a dangerous situation they had no way out of; yet, when Dan saw Phil, his face seemed to soften just a little. Super best friends and soulmates, until the end. 

Phil’s eye caught a car speeding towards them; they were running a red light, and the other driver was paying no more attention than theirs. Before he had time to react, the car was smashing into Dan’s side of the car. He screamed, and he remembered the scream, but he couldn’t hear it; by now he couldn’t hear anything at all. He could simply see Dan’s body collapse towards his as he was thrown back against his window. All went black, and he opened his eyes to his concerned family standing around his hospital bed. 

“He’s gone, isn’t he?” 

They nodded, and he closed his eyes once again. 

~~~

“Get plenty of rest, and don’t look at any screens for the next week unless you absolutely have to, and after that, only use them in moderation. Nothing too strenuous, alright?” 

“Mhm,” Phil nodded. It had been a couple days since the accident, and since he only had a concussion, they were releasing him. Really, he felt as if they probably should have just transferred him to the mental ward, but he didn’t say anything. He hadn’t said much at all since he found out about Dan. 

The Lester family was collectively worried about Phil seeming to have gone mute, but they also clearly wanted him to have time to grieve. They were just as shocked as he was. 

When they made it back to the flat, the family made it clear that they wouldn’t be leaving any time soon. Phil wanted to complain, but he didn’t feel like opening his mouth. Normally, it would have made him feel at least a little bit of comfort, but comfort didn’t seem feasible without Dan. 

Phil’s family set him up in his old room set (they assumed it would be too painful for him to lie in the room where he usually slept with Dan) with a stockpile of books and went to watch tv, promising to check in on him periodically. Phil was about as satisfied as he could have been, and he tried to read, but his brain was too scattered, and he found himself forgetting what he’d read by the time he finished the chapter. “Stupid concussion,” he muttered to himself, his voice a bit raspy from not speaking. Instead he chose to rest his eyes; the doctor did say to rest, and he was pretty sure he’d read that sleep is good for concussions. 

Before he could doze off, though, he heard what sounded like traffic. Sure, he was in London, but he was confident he’d never heard traffic that loud; it sounded as if he was right on the street. He opened his eyes to search for a source, and suddenly he saw himself in a car. Confused, he looked around and saw Dan sitting beside him. In front of them was their Uber driver from a few days before. 

“Oh, no,” Phil breathed, “no, no, no. Dan, we need to get out of here,” he said, turning to Dan, but he couldn’t hear. “Dan!” he shouted, reaching out to shake his arm, but his hand went straight through Dan’s skin. All the life breathed out of him as he realized there was nothing he could do. He tried to hurl himself from this horrible vision, but nothing worked. Even closing his eyes just sent him a level deeper into this hell. As the car approached them, Dan turned to Phil, and he knew the line. “Phil, are you okay?” He could already hear it in his head, but when Dan’s mouth opened, he said something completely different. 

“If only you’d have remembered your charger.” 

“Phil?” He lurched forward out of what he suddenly realized was a dream, but the feeling it left in him lingered. Martyn was standing over his bed, visibly worried. What a surprise. “Are you alright?” 

“Yeah, I’m fine,” Phil said, monotone. 

“Are you sure? You looked like you were in pain.” 

“Nope, head’s fine.” 

Martyn stood still for a moment, seeming to contemplate this, before sitting at the foot of Phil’s bed. It was like his older brother was pretending to be his father, and he didn’t care for it. “Well, I guess this is a good time to have a talk, then.” 

“About what?” Phil spurted out, a bit of a harsh undertone hiding in his words. 

“I know you can’t have your phone for a while, so I just wanted to ask you if you wanted me to say anything to the press. Obviously nobody’s said anything yet, and your entire fanbase is currently worried sick, given that you’re supposed to be doing panels at VidCon right now.” 

Phil just sort of stared at him for a moment. Why would he ever want Martyn to tell the media what happened to Dan? Schrödinger had come back to haunt him again; he knew that these people had no idea what had happened. Only Phil, their families, and the people involved knew. The entire world was left in the dark, and, to them, Dan was still alive. Even that simple of a thought was the only thing that gave him comfort. “No. I’ll announce it myself when I’m better.” 

“Are you sure? People are really w-” 

“I’ll do it myself,” he barked, cutting off his brother. 

Martyn jumped back a bit. “O-okay, Phil. I hope you feel better soon.” 

“Thank you,” he said sternly as Martyn left the room. Phil smiled for the first time since he’d found out that Dan was gone. It was difficult, but Phil managed to crack that smirk solely because he knew that even though he was really gone, to the world, Dan was lying right beside him. 

~~~

Phil couldn’t sleep that night, or the next night, or the night after that. Every time he dozed off, he dreamt of Dan’s violent death. Some dreams reenacted the real event, but others reimagined a whole different maiming; the only thing that stayed consistent between them all was that Phil was somehow to blame. 

That mindset carried into his waking hours as well; the only thing that remained constant in his head was the knowledge that he was at fault. If he had just remembered his damn charger, or just given it up and shared Dan’s, they would have caught their cab, and they never would have been in the Uber with that irresponsible driver. If it weren’t for Phil’s own stupidity, Dan would still be there. 

Phil stayed closed off from his family as well. They stayed in his living room, they brought him food, and they tried to interact with him as much as possible, but he’d never say a word in response. They tried to console him, but he felt nothing. They tried to joke with him, but Dan had taken Phil’s sense of humor with him when he left. Nothing was working. 

Really, Phil felt nothing at all. He hadn’t particularly realized it, but Dan had truly been his person. Dan had been the one person who filled him with all the feelings there were to feel, and in departing he sucked them right back out. He wasn’t sure he ever would feel again--not without Dan. 

But, in his mind, he deserved it. It was his fault. 

And that was never going to change.

Time continued to pass, and Phil’s concussion healed. He was able to use screens again, and he was allowed to aid in planning Dan’s funeral. He chose not to, but he knew the date was set for a few days ahead, and he did everything he could to ignore it. He tried to watch funny videos, but nothing made him laugh. He tried to watch something sad, but he couldn’t even cry. He just wanted to feel something, anything, but he couldn’t. He couldn’t feel anything while he was apart from Dan. 

The screens were his last hope. He thought that maybe he’d feel something when he had access to the Internet, to the world he’d built with Dan, but not even seeing the two of them together gave him back any feeling. He still couldn’t bear to tell the world what had happened, and he internally decided he never would. His body felt completely empty, and he’d resolved himself to the fact that it would until he met Dan again. 

 He even began to hallucinate, seeing himself in black and white whenever he looked in a mirror. He was a disaster as well, but all he really noticed was the lack of color. He fantasized that when he saw Dan again, they’d touch, and color would drain back into him. Everything would be okay again, but not without Dan. 

He needed Dan. 

~~~

The day of Dan’s funeral finally came, and Phil’s family helped him get ready. Phil was a bit brighter by then, or at least he appeared to be. The inside of his head was as dark as ever, and as he looked in the mirror, he still saw a black and white body putting on the all black suit, but everyone else saw color, and that was all that mattered. 

By the time they were done with him, he looked socially acceptable, and he was ready to leave. The empty shell that used to be Phil Lester droned along to the funeral home, and the visitation began. He stood there, barely paying any attention as people came and went. Few were allowed; the public would find out if too many were there. Phil didn’t care about any of them anyway; they were mostly relatives of Dan’s who Dan himself could barely stand. Phil knew Dan deserved more people at his damn funeral, but he didn’t care anyway. He was dead, and Phil was practically dead as well. 

Phil hadn’t a clue how long he’d been sitting in the front pew beside the casket when someone approached and put his hand on his shoulder. “We’re going to leave you two alone,” said Dan’s mother, giving him a grim smile before turning to leave. Phil gave no response, but he soon found that he was alone with the casket.

Schrödinger was back for a third time. As he stood overtop of the wooden box, to him, it was empty. He couldn’t see inside, and therefore he chose to believe it was empty. He knew that if he opened it his theory may change, but he had no way of knowing until he did, and so he wouldn’t. He hadn’t seen Dan since they were in the car, and he didn’t plan to. Not until he could truly be with him. 

Dan would be livid to know that his funeral was in a church. He’d be livid to know that they were burying him instead of cremating him as well, but Phil didn’t have the heart to step into the process and vocalize those concerns. He was surprised, at this point, to find that he had a beating heart at all. 

It was at that point that he felt the first feeling he’d felt since he learned about the accident: longing. He felt an overwhelming urge for the only closure he’d ever have, for the ability to be with Dan, even if for a moment, and even if he wasn’t really there. So it was then that he reached in and opened the casket. Within was Dan’s body, his face covered in makeup to look him look less pale and grey. In reality, Phil looked the same while he was alive, so there wasn’t much of a point in that. 

Suddenly, Phil felt like a human juice box. He didn’t know there was anything left inside him, but the image of Dan, lifeless in a casket, sucked out the very last of his feelings, and he knew he didn’t have a choice. He couldn’t wait any longer; he needed to be with Dan. 

~~~

Food piled up on the counter as Phil cheerily wished family goodbye. Had he any feeling left, he would have hugged them extra tight to say a long goodbye, but he couldn’t even bring himself to do that. As they all left, he looked at all the meals they’d prepared for him. They’d left at least a week’s worth of food for him to eat while he grieved; it was a shame, really. He knew he would have chuckled at the irony had he cared. 

“Don’t do this, Phil.” He turned on his heel and saw Dan standing in front of him, bright, white angel wings protruding from his back. 

“Dan,” he breathed out desperately, and broke out in a run towards him. He threw his arms around him, but quickly found that there was nothing to throw his arms around at all. 

“I’m sorry I can’t be there, but you can’t do this. So many people depend on you.” 

“Bullshit. I’m not strong enough for them,” Phil said, turning back down the hall and heading for their kitchen. “Not without you.” 

“Yes, you are,” Dan said, materializing again in his way. Phil simply walked right through him. “Think of the example you’re setting.” 

“What fucking example?” he exclaimed, throwing his arms up and bringing them back down to unsheathe a sharp knife from their block. “You were the example. What kind of example would I be if I just fucking sit here and let people down because I can’t even feel emotion without you?” 

“A better example than you would be if you do this! Everything we’ve done together has been to help other people stay alive. Don’t you remember? I’m so glad I failed. I was able to do so much. You know this story, and you were one of its greatest supporters; you can’t be turning against that and becoming selfish enough now to do this. This isn’t you, Phil.” 

“No, it’s not,” Phil replied, storming angrily down the hallway towards their bedroom. Their real bedroom. “I took that away from myself when I took you away from me.” 

“That wasn’t your fault.” 

“Yes, it was. I need to be with you, Dan; I need to finish what I fucking started.” 

“How do you even know this is me?” Dan pleaded as Phil settled himself on their bed. It was the first time he’d been in the room since they’d left for VidCon, and somewhere in him, it made him feel pain. “You don’t believe in the afterlife, and you know I sure as hell don’t. Why do you think this will get you to me in the first place?” 

“Oh, Dan,” Phil said almost whimsically, tracing the knife with his pointer finger, “I can tell it’s you. Nobody else loves me this much, not even my own psyche.” 

“What about Schrödinger? Until you’re here, I’m both here and not here. What if you made the wrong guess? Either is equally possible, even if you think you know what the truth is. Are you really willing to take that risk?” 

To add to the list of firsts, for the first time since the accident, Phil laughed, cupping his hands around the handle of the knife. “Not even Schrödinger can save me now.” 

He plunged the knife into his stomach, and a sigh of relief escaped as the physical pain rushed through his body. It was the only true feeling he’d felt since he’d found out Dan was dead, and something about it was almost comforting--no, it was comforting. He felt warmth rush through his body, and he finally, genuinely smiled as he saw Dan materialize in front of him again. He knew Dan was still just ouch of reach, but as life drained from him, he reached out nonetheless. 

“I love you.” 

All went dark, and he felt himself being pulled from his body. He felt as if he was floating, and images began to take shape in a cylinder around him. He sees Dan, but much younger and through a computer screen. It’s their first Skype call. To the right, he sees the first time they met. He watches as they run up to each other and embrace, and feeling begins to seep back into him. Every image he sees brings a little bit more feeling back to him as he floats higher and higher away from the misery of a world without his soulmate. He watches as he and Dan move in with each other, as they move to London, as they become radio hosts, and as they navigate success. He watches as they create a whole world of their own within the shitty world they were placed into, and he watches as they mold that world into a happy place not only for them but for others. He watches them write two books and travel the world twice, he watches them film Dan’s coming out video, and, finally, one last time, he watches the accident that took Dan away from him. 

But that didn’t matter anymore. There was a light at the end of the tunnel, quite literally, and Phil was approaching it. As he reached the top, he felt tears pouring from the turquoise eyes he wasn’t even sure he had anymore. Suddenly, he was engulfed in bright, white light, and he was sitting on a cordial stone wall. None of that mattered, either, because he saw Dan right in front of him. Speechless, he let Dan start.

“I’m so mad at you.” 

Before he could even respond, Dan knelt down in front of Phil and wrapped his arms around his neck. It was like a transfer of energy; as soon as Dan touched him, and he could finally really, truly touch him, Phil ironically felt completely alive again. Still without words, Phil shakily reached forward and cupped Dan’s cheeks before falling into a kiss. He was completely helpless, left to collapse into Dan’s arms, but he was okay with that. The two of them were together again, and that was all that mattered. 

Dan slid his hands down to Phil’s back and pulled away, leaving Phil’s hands sitting idly on his face. When Phil looked down at him, he saw that he was crying as well. Phil laughed, expelling more tears of joy from his postearthly ducts. “You lied. You look amazing in white.” 

Dan laughed back at him, a sound he knew all too well how much he’d missed. The two of them simply remained there for a moment, smiling in each other’s presence, before Dan stood back up. “Hey, Phil?” he said, holding his hand out to Phil. 

“Let’s go home.” 

[beckzorz]

PREMONITIONS 2 (2/8)

or, Adventures in Pursuit of a Seven-Year-Old Seer

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader Words: 1662 Summary: It’s been over a year since you met Bucky, and you couldn’t be happier. If only you could figure out why your precognitive niece is burying you in abstract crayon art… A/N: Happy new year!

Part 1

Your phone slips out of your hand and clatters on the ground at your feet. Blood rushes in your ears. You run to the front door, pull on your coat and boots, and yank open your door. Before you lock up, you remember your phone. You run back in and grab it. In another thirty seconds you’re in the street, trying to flag down a taxi. The freezing air stings your cheeks, your legs, but nothing compares to the terror flaring in your chest.

What the hell is happening? What was that call? Where is Gemma? Is Matt okay? What about Sarah?

Where is Gemma?

A taxi finally pulls over for you. You rattle off Matt’s address. “Hurry,” you add, voice catching. “It’s an emergency!”

The driver peels away from the curb. You can’t relax; you lean forward, breathing down your driver’s neck, not even buckled until he nervously asks you to sit back. Even then, you’re trembling, your blood pounding. You stuff your hands between your knees, but they’re shaking too.

Ten minutes never have never gone by by so slow.

The second he pulls up to Matt’s house, you open the door. You’re half out of the cab before you remember you need to pay. “Shit shit shit,” you mumble. Your purse is still hanging on its hook by the door back home.

You stare up at Gemma’s open window as you dig through your coat pockets. By some miracle, you find a twenty.

“Here, take it, keep the change,” you blurt, throwing the bill at the driver. You slam the car door shut and squeeze between the parked cars in front of Matt’s house.

The front door is unlocked. You burst inside, heart in your throat.

You freeze.

Half the stair runners are askew, and Gemma’s winter gear is strewn haphazardly across the living room. One of the couch pillows is in the kitchen doorway. You inch forward, barely breathing. The slow cooker is on the floor, and Sarah’s mulled cider is in a brown puddle across the floor, soaking into the pillow. A strangled sob escapes your throat.

You run upstairs to Gemma’s room. It’s empty, cold… The window is still open. Scribbled-upon papers litter the floor, covered in crayon and pen. Gemma’s bed isn’t made—but then again, it never is. You fall to your knees and press your hands to her bare sheets, willing them to reveal your niece. What’s happened to her? What’s happened to your brother?

In your pocket, your phone starts buzzing.

You flinch in surprise. Damn it, you should have called the cops by now! You pull your phone out and stare blankly at the screen before registering that it’s Bucky calling.

Thank god.

“Bucky!”

“Hey darlin’, how are y—”

“Matt and Gemma are missing!” you cry.

“What?”

You collapse onto Gemma’s bed. “Matt called and he said Gemma was missing and then someone else was there and the line went dead and now they’re gone and—”

“Woah, woah, hey, calm down,” Bucky interrupts. “Where are you?”

“Their house.” You sniff. “I haven’t even called the police, I just… ran over.”

“Okay. Okay.” Bucky is quiet for a moment, but you can hear his breathing accelerating. “I’m on my way there now. I’m going to call Steve, okay? If this is about what I think it’s about, we’ll be able to do more than the police. Okay?”

You bite your lip to keep your crying quiet. Instincts from the days before Bucky—most of your life, really—all want you to hang up and call the police. But Bucky’s not wrong. The Winter Soldier and Captain America have more resources at the arsenal than every police force in America. Probably.

“Y-yeah. Okay,” you tell him. “When will you be here?”

“Soon,” he says. “Where’s Sarah?”

“I—I don’t know. Her cider’s all over the kitchen floor…”

“Can you call her?”

“Um, okay. Yeah.” You sit up slowly. Your head is spinning, but you nod. “I can do that.”

“We’ll figure it out,” Bucky promises. “Call Sarah, and I’ll be there before you know it.” He pauses. “We’ll figure it out. It’ll be okay, darlin’. I promise.”

“Okay.”

You hang up. What else is there to say?

When you call Sarah’s phone, it rings from their bedroom next door. Your heart drops.

No one answers.

“Hello?” you call.

No one answers.

If Sarah is with her phone, why didn’t she answer it? Why would she ignore you?

She wouldn’t. She never has. The only options that come to mind are that she’s missing too—or she’s lying prone in her bedroom. Dead or unconscious.

You bolt to your feet and fly into the other bedroom.

An ounce of tension lifts from your shoulders. The bedroom’s empty; Sarah’s not here. At least she’s not dead—not that you can see. You still have no idea what’s going on, but at least you haven’t seen any dead bodies today.

“Darlin’?”

You jump. It’s Bucky. “Up here!”

Two sets of footsteps pound up the stairs. Two? You spin to face Bucky, who buries you in his arms without preamble. Over his shoulder, you see Steve going straight into Gemma’s room, his face drawn and focused. You close your eyes and let yourself relax into Bucky’s hold, burying your face in his chest.

“I’ve got you,” he murmurs. His metal hand is secure across your back; the other is on your neck, warm and grounding.

“Oh god, thank god you’re here,” you whisper. You pull back. There are wet spot on Bucky’s shirt, and you lift your hands to your cheeks in surprise. Oh. You’re crying.

Bucky brushes your tears away, his eyes soft but his mouth set. “We’re going to find them. And then we’re going to make sure nothing like this every happens again.”

Bucky and Steve go through the upstairs one room at a time. You hover along behind them, trying not to get in their way, but the house isn’t big and those two aren’t exactly small. Every other minute, you’re in their way. But they never send you away. Bucky’s focused on studying the rooms, looking for clues, but he says nothing.

When they move downstairs, you linger in Gemma’s room. You kneel at her bedside again, tracing the empty indent on her pillow. God, what’s happened to her? Your sweet niece, with her happy laugh and her stubborn determination and her ominous certainty—

You put your head against the spot where she sleeps, wishing you could close your eyes and hear her breathing, hear her heartbeat, hear anything that would reassure you she’s alive.

Downstairs, Steve and Bucky start to talk. You sit up and listen hard.

“This has to be about her powers,” Bucky says.

“I agree.” Steve sighs. “What’s the plan?”

“What’re you askin’ me for?”

“She’s your… dammit, I’ve never even been here before, Buck! You know these people.”

A thump—did Bucky punch something? You hope he didn’t leave a dent.

“Keep it together, Buck,” Steve hisses. “Your girl’s upstairs!”

Before Steve finishes, you can hear Bucky stomping up to you. By the time he reaches you, you’re sitting on Gemma’s bed, your hands between your knees. You can’t imagine what you look like, what with the crying and the terror, but Bucky doesn’t comment. All he does is kneel at your feet and take your hands in his. He stares up at you with tender concern.

“How are you doing?” he murmurs. You shake your head, unable to meet his eyes.

“I don’t know. I keep wishing her damn bed would tell me where she is.” You force a laugh. “Crazy, right?”

Bucky joins you on the bed and pulls you into his arms. “No,” he says. “Not crazy.” He settles his chin on your head. “I’m sorry to do this, but can you tell me about the phone call?”

You tell him as much as you can. The phone call, your harried trip over, your exploration of the abandoned house. He listens in silence.

“—and to think, I was going to have a nice night,” you finish with a sniff, thinking of the unlit candles and the pie no doubt setting off fire alarms in your oven and the new lingerie. What was all of that against your brother, his wife, your niece? “God. That sounds so selfish.”

“Trust me,” Bucky says, pulling back, “it’s not.” He kisses away the tears clinging to your cheeks, then tugs you back against him for a last, brief hug. When he pulls back, the dismay is clear on his face. “I don’t want to leave you. But I—we, Steve and me, need to get to the bottom of this.”

“I’ll be okay,” you say. You’re pretty sure it’s a lie, but what does that matter? “Go. Find them. Save them, and then come home safe.”

Bucky squeezed your hands. He studies your face, his blue eyes intent as if he were memorizing you. “Yes, ma’am.”

After Bucky and Steve leave, you call the police as instructed. It’s easier to tell the story this time. Or maybe you’re just numb.

Either way, you let them take your statement. You let them root around your brother’s empty house. You let them bring you out of Gemma’s room, downstairs, outsi—

“Wait,” you blurt.

You turn and rush back inside, back upstairs, and into Gemma’s room.

“This is a crime scene!” one of the officers says, running after you. She tries to grab your arm, but misses as you kneel on the floor and pick up a piece of paper.

Your heart pounds. It’s one of Gemma’s drawings. All the other pages on the floor are pictures of people, of animals, of houses or rocks or flowers. This one, though?

This one is abstract.

You stare at the paper clutched in your hands as the officer leads you back outside. Her lecture goes in one ear and out the other.

Gemma, you think, what are you trying to say?

Read Part 3 here!

[justisaisfine]

i love your bro au! one question that i havent seen asked yet : how was it on the night they left? did their parents see them? did some bros want to stay/were to scared to leave? did roman find the flat right away or did they have to stay in a hotel at first? how did each bro react to the fact that they were out? sorry that's a lot of questions but im curious!!!

Okay so I wanted to write down the gist of it and then it got long so heres a bunch of words that maybe makes sense im no writer hahaha

tw for abuse and stuff!!!!

They moved out in May, near the end of school. Roman is 15, Logan 13, Patton 9 and Virgil 5. Virgil isn’t in school yet(his bday being in the middle of school year he wouldve been too young to start that year) so he stays home with their mother while the bros go to school.

It’s past lunch, V is already up since morning because then he gets to mind his own thing since the mom doesnt get up till the afternoon.

Mom wakes up and goes to the kitchen, where V is quietly drawing at the table. she reeks of hungoverness and starts making herself mac/cheese or w/e

Notices Virgil at the table, she seems unusually calm and a bit slow and goes “GUess I should probably feed you” so she makes him a plate and shoves it on the table.

While she makes her own plate V gets up to get himself a fork from the pile of clean dishes on the counter (Logan made them the night before)

but it gets caught on something and makes a plate fall and break.

She starts screaming then. While he tries to pick up the broken pieces, frantically apologizing

She’s saying shit like “I feed you and this is how you repay me huh??” “Dont you know these things costs money you freeloader?”

Shes getting worked up and is obv still quite drunk but Virgil is used to screaming and is almost done picking up the mess when another plate crashes right besides him.

He flinches away, cutting his hands and dropping the shards- When he looks up his mom already has another plate in hand “This is what we do with our shit now right?” she yells and throws it again

Virgil scurries away from her now but she keeps going,

He tries to plea her to stop, keeps apologizing- hes crying and nearly panicking now but she doesnt even seem to hear him anymore and just keeps breaking dishes on him

——-

The brothers come back home from school then, and can hear crashes and yelling from outside

Roman sprints inside and loses his shit on their mother when he hears Virgil screaming

He wrestles the dish out of her hands and she just storms out, shoving Logan and Patton out of her way. They hear the door slaming and her car starting so they relax a bit-

Except Virgil is nearly catatonic now, trembling and whimpering at every movement the others make and clutching himself in fear. His eyes are unfocused and he doesnt react to Roamn’s voice when he tries to soothe him.

——-

After the initial shock, Roman carefully gathers Virgil in his arms and brings him upstairs to patch him up, with Logan and Patton on his heels

He’s oddly silent as he moves almost with muscle memory to bandage V.

But then he tells Logan to get their backpacks and start packing “The very bare necessities”

They go back and forth for a bit;

“Roman what-” “We’re leaving, Logan, we can’t stay here anymore” “Roman we have no where to go” “Is that worst than here?? Look at Virgil, Logan!– we’ll find a place- there’s a shelter near the train station” “That’s on the other side of town!” “Good then! The farther the better”  

Logan’s about to say something else but Patton speaks up softly then

“I want to leave too- I can help pack” and he’s gone to their room

Logan sighs and looks back at Roman

“I hope you know what youre doing Roman” “ ’ve got Not a clue, no” “Good thing you have me then huh?”

And just like that they’re packing (”no Pat-sorry we cant bring any toys” “Bring extra blankets okay?”)

they also pack some food- peanut butter, granola bars, water bottles etc and also raid the meds cabinet because they know that shits expensive.

Roman sneaks into their parents’ bedroom and takes the stash of liquid cash he know they hide there. 

Plus the money he made with summer jobs

——-

They walk to the shelter where they stay fro 5 days.

Logan finds the flat from the library computer

They get lots of weird looks and questions thrown their way but Roman’s a very good actor and lies about his age, says he has a job and pays the down payment and the landlord’s happy with just that. (he’s had worst tenants tbh)

Roman lets Logan and Patton have a week off of school but forces them back.

He quits school and starts looking for full time jobs. (which takes him a week to find- people apparently do have a softer heart when you bring in your baby brother when job hunting) 

——-

Roman doesnt have time to let the events sink in with all the paperwork and job hunting, but when it does, they’re all on the couch and he’s just so glad they’re all safe.

Logan immediately goes into research mode and looks up tips and how to’s on how to live on a budget

Patton has to be sat down and explained very thoroughly the situation but he accepts it with stride and surprising cheer.

Virgil takes a bit to adjust. He got very shaken by that night’s events and it took a while for him to come back from his kind of numb state. 

They’re all very jumpy and suspicious about what if their parents are trying to find them, but it calms down after two weeks with nothing on the news about four missing kids.

[soupbirded]

OK

Uh

Nevarez is the main character for the begining of the story ive written so far, very severe introvert, likes outdoors and stuff, camping, grew up close to some nnational parks and stuffs, hes from western usa, nevada or cali, mayb oregon, dunno yet(i think he'd be early 20s?)

Bennett is this big, dramatic guy, i think somewhere far north in the amrricas, in canada, dunno where ezactly tho. Hes best friends withhh(late 20 probs)

Piazza :] she used to be a doctor(lost her docotrate, havent thought how yet) shes super loud, like unnesicarlily loud(help how do you spell unnesicarly) she likes card games a lot and usually spends her free time playing them with Bennett(who is considerably worse at cards)(I tjink shes be late fourtys earliy fifties?)

Ferris is a super sweet guy, super interested in cars, motors, explosives, and cooking(its connected, i swear) he makes a lot of food for the others(mostly Nevarez, cos he doesnt really know how to cook very well)(I have no clue how old he could be tbh, 50-65 mayb)

Marshall is sweet, very tired all the time cos shes kinda bad at paperwork and ends up staying up really late to finish it. Shes likes to make jokes and stuff, prefers when things are lighthearted ya kno(mid 30s prob)

Oh yeah also the reason Bennett and Marshall have white streaks in their hair is cos Piazza was bummed about going grey so they bleached some of their hair to make her feel better :] i did a comic on it hold on

Its kinda silly lmao

Heres some more drawings of them

If you read tjis whole thing you prob have no idea whats going on but thays ok probs <3<3<3

Ghghghhghhhghhhhhhhghghgghg

Their names are(left->right):

Anson Laurens-Nevarez, Henry Bennett, Ferris, Maria Piazza, and Marshall

I never gave Ferris or Marshall first names but tbh they wouldnt use them anyways

Ok bye <3

Actually imma infodump more below a cut

Wait how do i make a cut on moblie

Aa ok ill just do it in a reblog :[

[cosaimai]

Actually, 1-170, game 😝

why do you subject me to this torture lmao 

but imma do it regardless (leaving out all the ones i’ve already answered ofc)

3: Do you have a favorite clothing style?

Goth of course

4: What was your favorite video game growing up?

hmm i didnt play many video games when i was super young so prob bioshock infinite

5: What three things/people do you think of most each day:

my best friend (@lauren-pc), my fictional crushes… (lets not judge me alright, i dont have a life), does the ocean count?

8: What is your Greek personality type? [Sanguine, Phlegmatic, Choleric, or Melancholic]

melancholic 

9: Are you ticklish?

yes

10: Are you allergic to anything?

lavender

11: What’s your sexuality?

asexual (homoromantic)

12: Do you prefer tea, coffee, or cocoa?

tea

13: Are you a cat or dog person?

hmm prob dog bc even tho cats are adorable their fur tends to bother me since it sheds a lot more easily (which is why i love hairless cats)

18: How much do you weigh? [Only ask this if you know the user doesn’t mind!]

I havent checked in a while since I don’t own a scale, but I think around 91-95lbs

19: Do you believe in ghosts/spirits?

yes

21: Are you religious?

nope lol

22: Pet peeves?

smacking, chewing w your mouth open, not using a coaster

23: Would you rather be nocturnal or diurnal [opposite of nocturnal]?

nocturnal !!

24: Favorite constellation?

hmmm prob Ursa Major

25: Favorite star?

Deneb or maybe Beta Draconis

26: Do you like ball-jointed dolls?

I am scared of all dolls, so, no

27: Any phobias or fears?

spiders & most bugs, also more specifically, dying in a sinking car

28: Do you think global warming is real?

ye

31: Do you get scared easily?

nope

32: How many pets have you own in your lifetime?

six i think

33: Blog rate? [You’ll rate the blog of the one who’s asking.]

11/10 :)

34: What is a color that calms you?

ocean blue ♥

35: Where would you like to travel and/or live?

in Washington state, preferably close to the coast

36: Where were you born?

texas

38: Introvert or extrovert?

extreme introvert

39: Do you believe in horoscopes and zodiacs?

ehh, they’re interesting and i do think you can apply them to people, so maybe ig

40: Hugs or kisses?

ughh i guess hugs

41: Who is someone you would like to see/visit right now?

my best friend

42: Who is someone you love deeply?

again, my best friend

43: Any piercings you want?

spider bites (which i’m getting soon !!), daith, conch, maybe an industrial, maybe a nostril piercing 

44: Do you like tattoos and piercings?

if you can’t tell, yes lol

45: Do you smoke or have you eiver done so?

I don’t, the closest I’ve come is vaping bc my friend’s step brother & his friend wanted me to try his vape

48: A sound you really love?

heavy rain/thunderstorms

49: Can you do a backflip?

um lmao no

50: Can you do the splits?

I think I still have my right splits, not my left or middle tho

51: Favorite actor and/or actress?

i guess I’d have to say Jake Gyllenhaal tho

53: How are you feeling right now?

i am tired

54: What color would you like your hair to be right now?

probably red or black, idk

55: When did you feel happiest?

probably last year, almost anytime during history class

56: Something that calms you down?

ASMR videos

57: Have any mental disorders? [Only ask this if you know the user doesn’t mind!]

none that are prof-dxed

58: What does your URL mean?

 oh i’ve told this tale many times on this blog, but to tell it once again: I used to go by the name Mai, and I used to be obsessed with space so cosmic+mai=mai and for some reason i made it cosaimai so basically cosmic mai mai

59: What three words describe you the most?

quiet, jaded, eccentric 

60: Do you believe in evolution?

yeah, i guess so

61: What makes you unfollow a blog?

if the content is really my thing or the person running it is transphobic/homophobic/etc. 

64: Favorite animal(s):

BATS ♥♥♥

66: Favorite emoticon:

c:

67: Favorite meme:

i can’t choose just one, i mean, pretty much any meme @lauren-pc sends me is pretty high quality

68: What is your MBTI personality type?

INTP

69: What is your star sign?

Aries

70: Can your dog roll over on command, if you have a dog?

I have two dogs and no

71: What outfit out of all your clothes do you like to wear the most?

uhhh probably my new killstar bittersweet babydoll dress

72: Post a selfie or two?

i posted two yesterday sooooo….

73: Do you have platform shoes?

i do !!

74: What is one random but interesting fact about yourself?

i can cross both my eyes, as well as cross just one at a time

75: Can you do a front flip?

nope, i wish

76: Do you like birds?

ehh, they’re alright 

77: Do you like to swim?

not really

78: Is swimming or ice skating more fun to you?

i do not like either, but i guess swimming

79: Something you wish didn’t exist:

Donald Trump

80: Some thing you wish did exist:

Can I say Starfleet?? bc i’m gonna say Starfleet

81: Piercings you have?

none :’(

82: Something you really enjoy doing:

sleeping

83: Favorite person to talk to:

@lauren-pc

84: What was your first impression of Tumblr?

that it was extremely boring, and here i am almost 5 years later

85: How many followers do you have?

364

86: Can you run a mile within ten minutes?

hell no

87: Do your socks always match?

yes, i actually specifically wear all black socks for this reason

88: Can you touch your toes and keep your legs straight completely?

ye

89: What are your birthstones?

diamond is the only one i know

90: If you were an animal, which one would you be?

a bat :)

91: If a flower could aesthetically represent you, what kind would it be?

hmmm…. this is difficult but probably like Cranesbill Geranium or smth

92: A store you hate?

Ross

93: How many cups of coffee can you drink in one day?

none, coffee makes me sick :/

94: Would you rather be able to fly or read minds?

read minds

95: Do you like to wear camo?

no

96: Winter or summer?

winter i guess

97: How long can you hold your breath for?

I have no clue, but probably less than 30 secs

98: Least favorite person?

well out of the people i know personally, probably my friends boyfriend

99: Someone you look up to:

oh gosh, i have no clue

100: A store you love?

if online stores count, definitely Killstar

101: Favorite type of shoes

tbh flipflops bc I’m lazy

102: Where do you live?

Texas

103: Are you a vegetarian or vegan? If so, why?

no, i wish i had the will to be a vegetarian 

104: What is your favorite mineral or gem?

aura quartz 

105: Do you drink milk?

Yes, milk is great tho my mild lactose intolerance disagrees with this fact

106: Do you like bugs?

no

107: Do you like spiders?

especially no

108: Something you get paranoid about?

usually bugs crawling on me while i sleep, or someone breaking into my house while i sleep

109: Can you draw:

i can, debatable whether it’s good or not tho

110: Nosiest question you have ever been asked?

no one tends to ask me very nosy questions

111: A question you hate being asked?

i’m open to pretty much any questions, but i guess i hate boring ones, none in specific come to mind

112: Ever been bitten by a spider?

I might have been, I didn’t know whether it was a spider bite for sure or not

113: Do you like the sound of waves at the beach?

yes

114: Do you prefer cloudy or sunny days?

cloudy

115: Someone you’d like to kiss or cuddle right now:

no one actually, I’m in a very touch averse mood

116: Favorite cloud type:

cirroctratus 

117: What color do you wish the sky was?

dusty pink or a darker shade of blue

118: Do you have freckles?

nah

119: Favorite thing about a person:

i don’t quite get what exactly this is asking but i guess appearance-wise, hands

120: Fruits or vegetables?

fruits

121: Something you want to do right now:

go to a lake or beach

122: Is the ocean or sky prettier?

ocean

123: Sweet or sour foods?

sweet

124: Bright or dim lights?

dim

125: Do you believe in a certain magical creature?

not really, unless you count aliens 

126: Something you hate about Tumblr:

all the drama

127: Something you love about Tumblr:

it’s easy to find content i enjoy

128: What do you think about the least?

i guess politics ?? i have no clue

129: What would you want written on your tombstone?

“NOW AS DEAD OUTSIDE AS SHE WAS INSIDE”

130: Who would you like to punch in the face right now?

No one comes to mind, except perhaps Donald Trump

131: What is something you love but also hate about yourself?

my weirdness, it’s interesting but usually deters people

132: Do you smile with your teeth showing for pictures?

no, i hate my teeth

133: Computer or TV?

TV I suppose

134: Do you like roller coasters?

nope

135: Do you get motion sickness or seasickness?

not usually

136: Are your ears lobed or attached?

attached

137: Do you believe in karma?

no 

138: On a scale of 1-10, how attractive would you say you are?

4/10

139: What nicknames do you have/have had?

Ry, Cosai-chan, Cosai, Mai, Rave (idk how many of those count but there ya go)

140: Did you have any pretend or imaginary friends?

no

141: Have you ever seen a therapist/shrink?

nope

142: Would you say you are a good or bad influence to others?

uhhh…. i’ve been called a bad influence so i guess i am

143: Do you prefer giving or receiving gifts/help?

receiving 

144: What makes you angry

people who don’t listen/don’t think i know what i’m talking about

145: How many languages do you speak fluently?

just english, though i could probably manage a conversation with my poor knowledge of french

146: Do you prefer boys, girls, and/or non-binaries?

girls & nb people

147: Are you androgynous?

i wish

148: Favorite physical thing about yourself:

eyes 

149: Favorite thing about your personality:

resilience 

151: If you could go back into time and live in one era, which would you choose?

The 80s for sure

152: Do you like BuzzFeed?

kinda

154: Do you like to kiss others’ foreheads or hands for platonic reasons?

no

155: Do you like to play with others’ hair?

sometimes

156: What embarrasses you?

almost everything i do when I’m around people bc for some reason i can’t help but think i mess up everything i do

157: Something that makes you nervous/anxious:

being around people

159: How many people are you following?

709

160: How many posts do you have on your blog(s)?

11, 604 on this one; 288 on my gore blog; 848 on my bpd blog

161: How many drafts do you have on your blog(s)?

29; 1; 0

162: How many likes do you have on your blog(s)?

7, 244

163: Last time you cried and why:

i don’t remember

164: Do you have long or short hair?

it’s kinda in between, i guess you could say long

165: Longest your hair has ever been:

a few inches above my waist

166: Why do you like, dislike, or have neutral feelings about religon?

i dislike it because it’s boring and kinda pointless for the most part, but to each their own

167: Do you really care how the universe and world was created?

occasionally 

168: Do you like to wear makeup?

not really

169: Can you stand on your hands or head for more than thirty seconds?

nope

170: Did you answer the questions you were asked truthfully?

yes

[zmayadw]

I totaly neglected my story posting :/ Shame on me!

So, here is next part, if anyone is still interested in reading :P

Have a nice evening! :)

Oh, and i guess i should mention, a slight warning - there is a little violence in this part, nothing serious, but still :P

CALL OF THE RAVEN

PART 20

Next morning it was actualy me that awoke first, Jake sleeping soundly. I snuck out fo the bed, tip toeing to the bathroom. I got dressed making as little noise as i could not to wake him. He could use some rest, finaly. I took the car keys sneaking out of the room. This time i will surprise him with coffee and breakfast. Driving to town, i tought of last night, smile coming to my face. Things wer going well, considering all. I parked the car, going for the coffe shop. I bough coffee and some croissants, and as i left the shop someone yelled my name. I turned and smiled „Hello, Phil.“ „Hey there gorgeous, you up early today.“ He said grining. It was early, just pass 7. I found it strange myself when i woke up, considering we came back at the motel late, and, well, all that followed after we did. I was sure i would sleep till late again. I smiled „Well, you know what they say about the early bird.“ „Indeed.“ He smiled back. „Well, good I ran into you, i need to talk to you anyway.“ „Oh, you do?“ i asked curiously. „But that can wait till later.“ He said, glancing at the coffees and croissants i was holding. „Dont want for loverboy to be waiting on you.“ I smiled akwardly. „Anyway, come to the Aurora later if you can, and i'll tell you all about it.“ „Alright, i will.“ I said. Phil chimed cheerfuly „Excellent! See you later then, gorgeous.“ I had no idea what Phil might need of me, but i was curious. Ugh, i groaned inside, Jake wont be too happy when i tell him about this. Hopefully, he figured out by now he has nothing to worry about considering Phil. All tho, i doubted the two of them will ever get allong well. Ah well, you cant have everything.

I parked back at the motel, taking the stuff out of the car and heading for the room. The moment i stepped inside, Jake was all over me. „What the hell, Maya!“ he almost yelled at me. „Well, good morning to you, too.“ I said, looking at him questioningly lovering the things i bought at the desk. „What wer you thinking?“ he asked me. „Uhm, well , coffee and breakfast mostly, but i somehow doubt that is the answer you want.“ „You are right about that.“ He said, frustration rising in his voice. „Was it so hard for you to take your phone with you?“ I winced at it a bit „Considering what almost happened last time i had my phone with me while driving, i would go with yes.“ He sighed „I get that, Maya, but what if something happend to you, how would i be able to find you?“ Crap, he had a point. „I'm sorry, Jake.“ I said. „I didnt think about that, dont be ma...“ I stopped abruptly. „Wait, wait,wait, what did you just say right now?“ „What?“ he asked. „You said 'find' “ I could literally hear the 'tick tick' of wheels in my brain as it hit me. „What did you do with my phone?!“ i asked. He was silent, and i knew i was right. „You are tracking my phone, arent you!?“ i said, squinting my eyes at him. „Fine! Yes, I am tracking your phone!“ he said, throwing his arms up with frustration. „You could have told me!“ He sighed desperatly „I know, but i didnt want to get you bothered with it. You had enough on your mind already.“ „Jake“ i said going to him, putting my hands arround his neck. „You need to tell me stuff like that. Im not mad you did it, its kinda cute.“ I smiled, making him smile back at me. „But“ i started serious „From now on, no more secrets. I want you to promise me you will tell me everything.“ „Alright, i promise.“ „Good.“ I said, giving him a kiss. „Now, can we eat, im actually pretty hungry.“ i chimed cheerfuly. He chuckled at me, taking the bag with croissants. He took one out, turning to me with a raised eyebrow „I can see that. There's this suspiciously looking croissant here thats missing a part.“ „Oops“ i said, taking it from his hand, grinning „Couldn't resist.“

I basicly devoured three croissants, sitting on the bed with my laptop. Jake was behind his laptop at the desk doing 'his stuff'. I took a sip of my coffe „I ran into Phil when in town, by the way.“ He straightend in the chair, turning to me „Oh, yeah?“ „Yes. He wants me to come to Aurora later, he said he wants to talk to me.“ „About what?“ he asked. „Thats what i will find out when i see him.“ „So, you decided already you will go.“ He said, squirming in his chair. „Ofcourse i will go, why wouldnt I?“ i asked. Jake was even more squirmy now, i chuckled inside. „I dont know.“ He siad. I grined „Are you getting jelous again?“ „No, i'm not!“ he replied, quickly turning back to his laptop. „Oh, you soooo are!“ i said laughing. I so liked teasing him. „Shut up.“ He said, throwing the empty croissant bag rolled in a ball at me. „Heeey, its not nice throwing stuff at others, mister.“ I said teasingly. „Stop distracting me then.“ „Fine, fine, be all serious.“ He looked sideways at me, and i stuck my toung to him. „You're impossible.“ He said. „I tought i was amazing.“ He chuckled „I might have gotten ahead of me with saying that.“ „Oy!“ i protested, throwing a pillow at him. He turned to me and crossed his arms at his chest „Mhm, its not fun, beaing teased at, right?“ He grinned. I squinted my eyes at him „Touché.“ He turned back to his laptop. „Ok, joking aside, you are welcome to come with me to Aurora later, if that would make you feel better.“ I told him. He turned back to me „You know what? I just might do that.“ I was surprised. I didnt mind him coming along, just didnt expect him to actualy say yes. „Alright then, its settled.“ Oh boy, this will be fun.

We parked at Aurora, and leaivng the car Jake said to me „I'll join you shortly, there's something i want to do.“ „Umm, alright.“ I said „Can i ask what it is?“ He just grined „You'll see later.“ He sat back in the car and drove off. I was left confused walking towards Aurora. Phil was sitting at the booth when i entered, turning towards me at the sound of doors opening. He smiled at me with his usual grin „Hello, gorgeous.“ „Hey Phil.“ I smiled back, joining him. There was a bunch of papers in front of him. „Hope i didnt catch you at a bad time.“ I asked, him smiling at me „Dont worry, gorgeous, i could use a break anyway, i cant add one plus one anymore staring at all this numbers.“ He got up, ushering me to sit „Want something to drink?“ he asked, adding with a wink „I have a fresh pot of coffee waiting.“ I grinned „You know me so well.“ „Hey, i'm just glad i'm not the only coffee addict around here.“ he said with a grin before leaving. His phone rang as he left, so it took him a while before he came back. „Sorry, gorgeous, business call.“ He said, putting a coffee cup infront of me and sitting down. He leaned in the booth „I was sure that 'loverboy' would come with you.“ „Huh, well you wer right, he will join us soon.“ He laughed „Does he feel that much threatened by me?“ I looked at him, groaning desperatly „Phil..“ „Dont worry, gorgeous, i'll behave.“ He grinned. „As much as possible.“ He added winking at me. „Oh, im sure you will.“ I said, shaking my head at him. I took a sip of coffee „So, what was it that you wanted to talk to me?“ „Ahh, straight to business, right?“ he said to me. „Well, i am curious about it, so, come on, out with it.“ I grinned at him. „Alright, alright“ he said. „I have a business proposition for you.“ „You do?“ i looked surprised at him. „Indeed.“ „Alright, and what is it about?“ i asked. „Well, you do draw and designe, right?“ he asked, and i nodded. „I would like you to do a new design for t-shirts and some other stuff for Aurora.“ I was surprised by it. „You do?“ „Ofcourse.“ He said. „Why look so surprised by it, gorgeous?“ he asked with a smile. „Umm, well, dont get me wrong, I am flattered by it, but i'm sure there is someone better then me for it.“ Phil shook his head at me „Let me tell you something, gorgeous.“ He started, looking serious at me. „When it comes to work, i dont choose lightly.“ I still wasnt convinced. „And, besides, you can thank the 'all mighty internet' here.“ He said grining at me. „ You think i didnt chek up your skills before offering this to you?“ He wasnt wrong, i was good at what i did. „Alright“ i started „I appreciate it, really, but i have to decline.“ Phil looked dissapointed „Why? And dont give me some crap answer, Maya.“ „Well, honestly, i cant accept because i couldnt charge you for it.“ „And why not? Because we're friends?“ he said, and i nodded. „Its business, gorgeous, of course it comes with payement.“ „True, but i just wouldnt feel right doing it, Phil.“ I said desperatly. I added after a moment of silence „I could do it as a favore, tho, that would sound better to me.“ Phil looked at me serious for a moment, before his eyes sparkled and he grinned „Alright, how about this: you do it anyway, but instead of me paying you, i make you a special deal.“ I raised my eyebrow at him „And what special deal that might be?“ He laughed „ Dont worry, gorgeous, its nothing dirty, as you might think.“ He winked, smiling devilishly. I rolled my eyes at him „I havent tought of something like that.“ I said sarcasticly, but it actually did cross my mind. „ Ofcourse you didnt.“ Phil said, rising his eyebrow. „Well, what that special 'deal' is then?“ i asked. He grinned „ You get to drink for free here from now on.“ I laughed „You really will try anything to get me to accept it, arent you?“ „Hey, its a good deal, gorgeous. You have no clue how manny people would gladly take that kind of the offer.“ He said to me winking. „Allright, Phil“ i said after a momet „You convinced me, I'll do it.“ „Excellent!“ he chimed cheerfully, rubbing his hands together. He got up „I

think we need to seal this with a drink!“ I laughed „Ofcourse you do.“ The door of the Aurora opened then, and we both turned to see Jake walking in. He came to the booth, not taking his eyes from Phil, and Phil doing exactly the same. „Perfect timing, loverboy.“ Phil said „We wer just about to celebrat.“ He winked at me, leaving the booth. Jake looked at me, and i saw annoyance in him from Phils behaviour. He growled sitting next to me „Do i still have to behave arround Phil? I havent punched anyone in a long time, but i'm sure i still remember how to do it.“ I shook my head at him „Yes, you still have to behave.“ I grined leaning for a kiss „And, if you ever want to see me naked again, no punching, either!“ He raised his eyebrow at me after we kissed „You are taking away all the fun from me.“

Phil came back settling three glasses and a bottle of whiskey at the table. „So, did she tell you the good news already?“ he asked Jake, filling the glasses up. „No, she didnt.“ Jake replied, turning to me now. I sighed „Phil offered me a job.“ „Did he, now.“ Jake said, turning to look back at Phil. „Ofcourse i did.“ He said and grinned. „Our girl here is quite talented at her work.“ He handed us the glasses, taking his and rising it towards me. „Here's to you, gorgeous.“ I glanced at Jake, him being suprisingly calm to Phils words. He took a sip from his glass, settling it down. Me? I finished mine in one gulp. This calmness of his got me worried. „Whoa, easy there gorgeous.“ Phil said to me chuckling. „Could you stop calling her that?“ Jake said to Phil, his eyes darkening. Phil leaned back in the booth „What? Gorgeous?“ he said, giving Jake a grin „But she is, so why not say it.“ „Oh, for the love of it.“ I said, taking the bottle and filling my glass again. They both continued staring at eachother, completly ignoring me. „Phil“ Jake started, sounding calm but his voice so sinister „I promised Maya i'll behave, and i really dont want to break that promise.“ „Oh, relax loverboy, i'm just messing with you.“ Phil told him back, grining. „But let me just say this to you“ he started, taking the bottle to refill all the glasses, looking smug at Jake. „I know your type, I've seen it manny times before. Eventualy, you will mess up with her. And when you do, i will be right here waiting.“ And that was it - Jakes fist flew to Phils face, sending him sprawling on the floor from the booth. I basicly jumped over the table, glasses spilling all over and on me, making myself stand in front of Jake, as he shot up from his seat to go for Phil again. „Stop it!“ i shouted at him, but he looked so furios at Phil. His eyes wer so dark, and he was breathing so fast. I wasnt sure he even aknowledged I was standing in front of him. He wanted to push through me for Phil, i had to use all my strenght to try and push him back . I never saw him like this before, it got me frighten. „Please, Jake!“ I yelled once more pleadingly. He looked at me. The shock that was shown on my face made him tense, his eyes opening wide. „Shit!“ he said, turning from me, and storming towards the doors. I just stood there, taking a deep breath to calm myself as Jake left Aurora. I turned to Phil „What the fuck, Phil! You just had to do it?“ i yelled at him furiously. Phil just grined at me „Sorry gorgeous, i was just being honest, as always.“ „You just wanted to provoke him!“ „Look, Maya“ Phil started, getting up from the floor. „I meant what i said. He will mess things up eventualy, i can bet you. He will end up hurting you.“ „No, he wont!“ i continued yelling at him „You know nothing about him! And if you hoped provoking him will make me care less for him, you wer wrong!“ I took a few more deep breaths calming myself down once more. „And 'friends' dont wish for other friends to end up miserable.“ I said my voice taking on a sad notch. Phil winced at my words. „Thanks, Phil, thanks a lot.“ I said, turning away from him heading for the doors.

Stepping outside i wanted to scream in frustration. Like i didnt have enough happening in my life already. Jake was nervously pacing back and forth next to the car, stopping as he saw me. He walked towards me. „I'm sorry, i'm so, so sorry!“ he said to me. „I shouldnt have let him provoke me.“ He started pacing nervously again in fron of me. „Jake, it's fine.“ I said, but he didnt hear me. „He's just so annoying, i just couldnt control myself anymore!“ „Jake, it's alright.“ I tried again, but he just continued. „And talking to you like that? He has no right! Who does he think he is?“ „Jake!“ i yelled at him, making him stop and look at me. „It's fine.“ I said again, finaly having his attention. „It is?“ he asked, looking surprised. „Yes. He did kinda deserve it.“ I told him. „I tought you would be furious.“ he said to me, still surprised. „Oh, i am.“ I started „I'm not a fan of this things happeneing, just to make it clear to you. And to be honest, i should have forseen something like this happening, i shouldnt have let you come with me, so im furios at myself, too“ i said. My face got all serious then „You got me worried there for a moment.“ He looked at me, worry creeping to his face. „You didnt get scared of me, Maya..did you?“ he asked, his voice insecure a bit. „No, Jake, i didnt.“ I said „But i was scared I wont be able to stop you.“ He took a deep breath. „Maya, because of you, is why i stopped.“ I smiled at him, embracing him in a hug, leaning my head on his chest „I told you i will be your 'helping hand'.„ „Yes, you did.“ He smiled. „And I am sorry I did this.“ „Dont worry about it.“ I said, looking back at him, grinning „ I would have punched him myself if he continued like that, either way.“ Jake laughed at it „I can totally picture you do it.“ „I know, right!?“ i exclimed cheerfully, and he leaned to me for a kiss. As the kiss ended i asked „Can we go now, please, i just want to leave here.“ He smiled at me, hugging me with one hand, and we started walking back to the car. „You and me, both.“ Jake unlocked the car, and i went to the other side to get in. I opened the doors, and tensed. I sat in, turning to Jake, fear creeping at me. „Jake, are you going somewhere?“ He turned to me, confused „What are you talking about?“ I glanced at the back seat, a black traveling bag there. He chuckled at me „Relax, Maya, its just some clean clothes i took.“ .“ I sighed relieved, for a moment there i thought the worst. He looked at me raising his eyebrow „I am mostly with you at the motel, and i doubt any of your shirts would fit me.“ „Oh i dont know, i think that pink lace tank top of mine would fit you perfectly.“ I said teasingly. He laughed, shaking his head at me „Pink is definitely NOT my color.“

[salazar-slytherin-8867]

I challenge you to answer ALL the unusual asks. (If not just answer the ones you want to)

(thanks) 

1) Spotifiy, Soundcloud, or Pandora? 

Spotifiy

2) Is your room messy or clean? 

Messy. very. very. messy. 

3) What color are your eyes? 

blue/green.  

4) Do you like your name? why?

Not really. I got bullied for it in third and fourth grade about it, so Ive kinda disliked it since, but at least its not generic. 

5) What is your realationship status? 

in a relationship. 

6) Describe your personality in 3 words or less. 

Really fucking annoying. 

7) What color hair do you have? 

Blonde, but Im thinking of dying it. 

8) What kind of car do you drive? color? 

I cant drive, but my mom car is a green 2000 Toyota Camry 

10) How would you describe your style? 

All over the place and completely random. 

11) Favorite Social Media Account? 

Probabaly my Facebook, cause thats where I talk to most of my family. 

12) What size is your bed? 

Twin, I think. 

13) Any sibblings? 

I have two half sisters and two half brothers on my fathers side, and a twin brother. 

14) If you could live anywhere in the world, where would it be, and why? 

Mars cause I want to go to Pigfarts  Probabaly like the Oregon coast. cause I like cold weather and the West Coast

15) favorite Snapchat filter? 

I dont use Snapchat, soooo. 

16) Favortie makeup brand(s) 

I dont wear a lot of make up, but I do like e.l.f. 

17) How many times do you shower in a week? 

On a good week, 5-6, on a bad week, 2-3. 

18) Favorite Tv show? 

Rick and Morty, or NCIS 

19) Shoe size? 

 sometimes I wear a 5, others a six or seven, it varies depending on the style of shoe… 

20) How tall are you? 

5′1″ 

21) Sandals or Sneakers? 

Sneakers

22) Do you go to the gym? 

Nope. 

23) Describe your dream date.

probably just like, picnic by a lake or at a park. 

24) How much money do you have in your wallet right now? 

I dont have a wallet, but I have a jar of pocket money with $83

25) what color socks are you wearing? 

Im not wearing socks but earlier I was wear black socks. 

26) How many pillows do you sleep with? 

I only have one for my head, but I have 12 pillows on my bed. 

27) Do you have a job? what do you do? 

does being annoying and sad count as a job? 

28) How many friends do you have? 

12, but only half are close friends. 

29) What is the worst thing youve ever done? 

In third grade I gave a kid a black eye…

30) whats your favorite candle scent? 

Spring Rain. 

31) 3 favorite boy names?

Max, Alex, Jake. 

32) 3 favorite girl names? 

Raine, Sage, Autum. 

33) Favortie actor? 

Lenardo DeCaprio 

34) Favorite Actress? 

Emma Watson 

35) Who is your celebrity crush

Dont have one. 

36) Favorite Movie? 

Rent 

37) Do you read a lot? what is your favorite book? 

I’ve actually been trying to read more, I love Sparrow Road, If I stay, and Shadow. 

38) Money or brains? 

Brains, teach a man to fish.

39) Do you have a nickname? 

Moxie Clean, Moxanne, Molly Molly Moxen Free, Marshmallow, mo, mox. 

40) How many times have you been to the hospital? 

Once, when I was five, when I cracked my forhead open I Have a Scar I am Harry Potter

41) top ten favorite songs? 

Thats What You Get~Paramore,Thnks Fr Th Mmrs~ Fall Out Boy, Misery Business~Paramore, Whatsername~Green Day, It Ends Tonight~All American Rejects, Be my Escape~Relent K, 21st Century Breakdown~Green Day, Always~Blink-182, Ignorance~Paramore, A Drop in the Ocean~ Ron Pope. 

42) Do you take any medications daily? 

Zyrtec, and Asprins. 

43) What is your skin type? 

No clue, kinda dry I guess? 

44) What is your biggest fear? 

Probably abandonment having no one care about/like me. or being a disapointment. 

45) How many kids do you want? 

probably just one. three max. 

46) What is your go to hairstyle? 

I just leave my hair down. 

47) what type of house do you live in? 

I live in an apartment, that is super tiny, and hasnt been updated since the ealy 90′s… 

48) Who is your role model? 

the woman my mother works for. and my Grandmother. 

49) what is the last complement you recived? 

one of my friends told me he liked my rant about depression. 

50) What is the last text you sent? 

‘bro, did you die?!?’ 

51) How old were you when you ofund out Santa wasnt real? 

I was 5, I still put out cookies, but now they’re for my Grandmother and Grandfather. 

52) What is your dream car? 

I dont know yet, maybe just a Pale Green VW bug, or something that costs less. 

53) Opinion on smoking? 

I dont like smokers Ive been bullied my entire life cause all my clothes smell like cigerette smoke, but I dont really get to voice my thoughts cause most of my family smokes. But I have no plans to when Im old enough. 

54) Do you go to college? 

No. And I wont be anytime in the next five years or so.

55) What is your dream job? 

Chemist/Nurse/Author, or something that does good and pays well. 

56) Would you rather live in rural areas or the suburbs? 

Rural Areas. Its nice to see all the stars so clearly. 

57) Do you take the shampoo and conditioner bottles from hotels? 

should I not? 

58) Do you have freckles? 

No, but my mother says that I did when I was younger. 

59) Do you smile for photos? 

Sometimes. 

60) How many pictures do you have on your phone? 

I dont have a phone so….

61) Have you ever peed in the wood? 

nope. 

62) Do you still watch cartoons? 

yeah. 

63) do you perfer chicken nuggets from Wendy’s or McDonalds? 

 I cant afford to eat out. (just for the record, Micky D’s) 

64)Favorite dipping suace? 

ranch. 

65) What do you wear to bed? 

it depends, it I dont feel like changing I’ll sleep in what Im wearing, otherwise, just sweats and a tee shirt. 

66) have you ever won a spelling bee? 

Ive never even entered cause in third grade, my teacher told me not to bother trying cause my spelling was too bad, so I havent entered since. 

67) What are your Hobbies? 

Is eating a hobby? I like to read, draw, write, and sit around being sad. and kazoooo

68) Can you draw? 

Not well. 

69) do you play an insturment? 

Clarinet, Guitar, and piano. 

70) what is the last concert you saw? 

a band concert, that I was in. 

71) tea or coffee? 

Both. 

72) Starbucks or Dunkin? 

that depends on the day, what planets where seen last night, what color socks Im wearing, when the next full moon is, and weather or not I have money. 

73) Do you want to get married? 

Maybe. 

74) what is your crushes first and last initial? 

M.D. 

75) Are you going to change your last name when you get married? 

maybe. 

76) what color looks best on you? 

teal maybe? I honestly have no clue. 

77) do you miss anyone right now? 

My friends from school, and old nieghboirs. 

78) Do you sleep with your doors open or closed? 

normally, I would sleep with my door closed, by my brother broke the hinge, so now it can only be open 

79) Do you believe in ghosts? 

yeah. 

80) what is your biggest pet peeve? 

 people who only care about others and never help themselves, people who act entitled when they arent, and people use terms they dont know the deffinition of. 

81) Last person you called? 

@geez-man, in like, June

82) favorite Ice Cream flavor? 

mint or coffee. 

83) Regular oreos, or golden oreos? 

regular. 

84) Chocolate or rainbow sprinkles? 

both. yes. all of the above. 

85) What shirt are you wearing? 

its a leopard with the David Bowie lighting blot on its face. 

86) what is your phone background? 

*doesnt have phone* 

87) Are you outgoing or shy? 

A bit of both, it depends who Im with, 

88) do you like it when people play with your hair? 

sometimes, depends who it is. I have trust issuses with people who touch my hair, cause in fifth grade a girl told to whole school I had lice, even though I didnt. 

89) do you like your neighboirs? 

I dont know my nieghboirs that well, cause most poeple are only here a couple months and then they leave, so really Im indifferent. 

90) Do you wash your face? at night? in the morning? 

in the mornings. 

91) have you ever been high? 

nope. 

92) have you ever been drunk? 

nope. 

93) Last thing you ate? 

A chicken sandwhich with pesto, chedder and pita chips. 

94) Favorite lyrics right now? 

“why do we like to hurt so much?”~thats what you get, Paramore; 

“The walls start breathing My mind’s un-weaving Maybe it’s best you leave me alone”~It ends tonight, All American Rejects;

“Well there’s a million other girls who do it just like you Looking as innocent as possible to get to who They want and what they like, it’s easy if you do it right”~Misery Business, Paramore. 

“If I could find you now things would get better We could leave this town and run forever” Ocean Avenue, Yellowcard.

“Where’s your gavel? Your jury? What’s my offense this time? You’re not a judge but if you’re gonna judge me Well sentence me to another life.”Ignorance, Paramore

“Don’t wanna hear your sad songs I don’t wanna feel your pain When you swear it’s all my fault Cause you know we’re not the same”~Ignorance, Paramore. 

95) Summer or Winter? 

Winter. 

96) Day or Night? 

night. 

97) Dark, milk or white chocolate? 

Milk chocolate. but if you offer me white or dark chocolate, I wont refuse. 

98) Favorite Month? 

August. 

99) What is your Zodiac sign? 

Scorpio

100) Who was the last person you cried in front of? 

I dont cry when Im with other people. 

(I probabaly mispelled 50% of this. Im sorry.) 

[heavenrules4-blog]

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[theconservativebrief]

Once, when I was 9, my mother and I were scouring the summer night sky for stars, meteors, and planets.

Suddenly, an object with a light that pulsed steadily from bright to dim caught my eye. It didn’t have the usual red blinkers of an aircraft and was going far too slowly to be a shooting star.

Obviously, it was aliens.

My excitement was short-lived as my mother explained it was a satellite catching the sun as it tumbled along its orbit. I went to bed disappointed: The X-files was on TV twice a week back then, and I very much wanted to believe.

Today that hope is still alive and well, in Hollywood films, the public imagination, and even among scientists. Scientists first began searching for alien signals shortly after the advent of radio technology around the turn of the 20th century, and teams of astronomers across the globe have been taking part in the formal Search for Extraterrestrial Intelligence (SETI) since the 1980s.

Yet the universe continues to appear devoid of life.

Now, a team of researchers at the University of Oxford brings a new perspective to this conundrum. In early June, Anders Sandberg, Eric Drexler, and Toby Ord of the Future of Humanity Institute (FHI) released a paper that may solve the Fermi paradox — the discrepancy between our expected existence of alien signals and the universe’s apparent lack of them — once and for all.

Using fresh statistical methods, the paper re-asks the question “Are we alone?” and draws some groundbreaking conclusions: We Earthlings are not only likely to be the sole intelligence in the Milky Way, but there is about a 50 percent chance we are alone in the entire observable universe.

While the findings are helpful for thinking about the likelihood of aliens, they may be even more important for reframing our approach to the risk of extinction that life on Earth may face in the near future.

In 1950, while working at Los Alamos National Laboratory, physicist Enrico Fermi famously exclaimed to his colleagues over lunch: “Where is everybody?”

He had been pondering the surprising lack of evidence of other life outside of our planet. In a universe that had been around for some 14 billion years, and in that time developed more than a billion trillion stars, Fermi reasoned there simply must be other intelligent civilizations out there. So where are they?

We still don’t know, and the Fermi paradox has only strengthened with time. Since the 1950s, humans have walked on the moon, sent a probe beyond our solar system, and even sent an electric sports car into orbit around the sun for fun. If we can go from rudimentary wooden tools to these feats of engineering in under a million years, surely there would have been ample opportunity in our 13.8 billion-year-old universe for other civilizations to have progressed to a similar level — and far beyond — already?

And then, surely there would be some lingering radio signals or visual clues of their expansion reaching our telescopes.

Space is a large place, and the task of accurately estimating the likelihood of little green men isn’t exactly easy.

In 1961, astronomer Frank Drake proposed a formula that multiplied seven “parameters” together to estimate N, the number of detectable civilizations we should expect within our galaxy at a given moment in time:

Ming Hsu

The Drake equation was only intended as a rough tool to stimulate scientific discussion around the probability of extraterrestrial life. However, in the absence of any reasonable alternatives, it has remained astronomers’ only method of calculating the probability of extraterrestrial intelligence. This is problematic because while some parameters, such as R* — the rate of new star formation per year — are relatively well-known, others remain hugely uncertain.

Take L, the average lifespan of a detectable civilization. If we look at the average length of the past civilizations here on Earth, it wouldn’t be unreasonable to assume a low value. If the Romans, Incas, or Egyptians are anything to go by, it seems hard to make it past a few hundred years. On the flip-side, you could argue that once a civilization becomes technologically advanced enough to achieve interstellar travel, it could conceivably last many billions of years.

This enormous uncertainty leaves the Drake equation ultimately vulnerable to the optimism or pessimism of whoever wields it. And this is reflected in previous scientific papers whose results give values of N ranging anywhere from 10 to many billions.

As astronomer and SETI co-founder Jill Tarter eloquently put it in an interview with National Geographic in 2000: “The Drake Equation is a wonderful way to organize our ignorance.”

Sincere attempts to overcome this vulnerability have previously been made via selecting a handful of conservative, medium, and bullish best estimates for each parameter value and then taking an average across them.

In their new paper, titled “Dissolving the Fermi Paradox,” the FHI researchers dispute this method by demonstrating how this technique typically produces a value of N far higher than it should, creating the illusion of a paradox.

This is because simply selecting a few point estimates and plugging them into the Drake Equation misrepresents the state of our knowledge. As an example, imagine three scientists who have differing opinions on the value of L:

If you take a normal, linear average of all the possible integer values from one to 1000, you would implicitly factor scientist C’s opinion 90 times more than scientist A’s because their range of belief is 90 times larger. If you use a logarithmic scale to represent the above so that each scientist’s range corresponds to one order of magnitude, all three opinions will be represented more equally.

Therefore, the researchers represented the full range of possible values on a logarithmic scale and ran millions of simulations to obtain more statistically reliable estimates for N. They then applied a technique known as a Bayesian update to those results. That means mathematically incorporating the information that we have not discovered extraterrestrial intelligence yet (because the absence of evidence of aliens is evidence itself!).

This two-stage process produced striking results: Based upon the current state of astrobiological knowledge, there’s a 53 to 99.6 percent chance we are the only civilization in this galaxy and a 39 to 85 percent chance we are the only one in the observable universe.

This implies that life as we know it is incomprehensibly rare, and if other intelligences exist, they are probably far beyond the cosmological horizon and therefore forever invisible to us.

To be clear, the paper’s authors do not appear to be making any definitive claim about whether or not aliens exist; simply, our current knowledge across the seven parameters suggests a high likelihood of us being alone. As new information becomes available, they would update that likelihood accordingly. For example, if we discover a second instance of abiogenesis — the process of rudimentary life emerging from non-living matter — on a comet or another planet, then this would narrow the uncertainty on the fl parameter significantly.

Nonetheless, their results have certainly caused a stir, especially after SpaceX CEO Elon Musk tweeted them:

This is why we must preserve the light of consciousness by becoming a spacefaring civilization & extending life to other planets https://t.co/UDDP8I1zsS

— Elon Musk (@elonmusk) June 25, 2018

Many reacted to the paper’s findings by calling it anthropocentric and narrow-minded, arguing that any conclusion suggesting we Earthlings are somehow special is simply human arrogance.

This is somewhat understandable because the idea that intelligent life is extremely rare in the universe feels completely counterintuitive. We exist, along with other intelligent life like dolphins and octopi, so we assume what we see must be extrapolatable beyond Earth.

But this alone is not proof that intelligent civilizations are therefore ubiquitous. Whether the true likelihood is as high as one in two, or as inconceivable as one in a trillion trillion trillion, the mere ability to consciously ask ourselves that question depends on the fact that life has already successfully originated.

This phenomenon is known as an observer selection effect — a bias that can occur when thinking about the likelihood of an event because an observer has to be there to observe the event in the first place. As we only have one data point (us), we have no reliable way to predict the true likelihood of intelligent life. The only conclusion we can confidently draw is that it can exist.

Regardless of which side you take, the idea that we might be alone in the universe raises serious scientific and philosophical questions. Is our rareness something to celebrate or be disappointed by? What would it mean for humans to be the only conscious entities in the universe?

This last question matters hugely. Not only are we depleting our environmental resources at an unsustainable pace, but for the first time in the history of mankind, we’ve reached the technological stage where we hold the entire future of our species in our own hands. Within a few years we built enough nuclear weapons to exterminate every human on earth many times over and made these weapons available to our leaders on a hair-trigger. Each decade has brought us novel technologies with ever-increasing potential for both immense good and immense destruction.

As we rang in the new year, the Bulletin of Atomic Scientists moved the Doomsday Clock to the closest it has ever been to midnight. Meanwhile, estimates from various specialists in existential risk suggest somewhere between a 5 to 19 percent chance of complete human extinction by the end of this century — an unacceptably large probability considering the stakes.

Not only does this dark gamble affect the 7 billion of us alive today; if you factor in the moral weight of the billion billions of future people who would also never get to live out their existences, it becomes clear that we urgently need to get our collective act together.

As Carl Sagan famously said in his 1990 Pale Blue Dot speech: “In all this vastness, there is no hint that help will come from elsewhere to save us from ourselves. The Earth is the only world known so far to harbor life. … the Earth is where we make our stand.”

He’s not wrong, especially in light of this paper’s findings. If humanity really is the only civilization that may ever exist in this universe, then we shoulder a responsibility on a truly astronomical scale.

Liv Boeree is a science communicator and TV host specializing in astrophysics, rationality, and poker.

Original Source -> Why haven’t we found aliens yet?

via The Conservative Brief

[apsbicepstraining]

FA Cup third round: 10 ties to look out for this weekend

Ailing Bolton and Aston Villa ogle vulnerable at Eastleigh and Wycombe, Exeter v Liverpool retains its enticement amid TV meddling and Chelsea might just imagination their Cup chances

1) Eastleigh wave non-league flag against Bolton

Previously excellent known for subsisting leukaemia and subsequently being pecked to within an inch of their own lives by emus on Soccer AM while wearing a hair made from lettuce and cookies in the name of charity, Eastleighs young Welsh manager Chris Todd has every right to imagination his Hampshire slopes chances of advancing to the fourth round at the expense of Bolton Wanderers. The only non-league area left in the challenger, Eastleigh sit fourth in the Conference and have been bankrolled to the pitch of PS3m by their sugar daddy, Stewart Donald, in recent years. They figure the former QPR winger Lee Cook and the ex-Nottingham Forest defender Dan Harding among their ranks, two musicians who wont have come cheap. Of course Bolton Wanderers have abundance of Championship experience more, having played poorly enough in the schism this season to find themselves fastened to the bottom of the table as well as PS173m in debt, the subject of a winding-up order from HM Revenue and Customs, under a move embargo and resigned to the possibility of having to sell their best musicians during this January window. These are dark epoches at the Macron Stadium on and off the lurch, with makes good and staff members doubtful when or if they are able to next getting paid. With securing Championship survival almost certainly a priority for Neil Lennon and his musicians, Eastleigh love could be forgiven for being more expectant than hopeful of hitting them in the compact environs of the 5,192 -capacity Ten Acres and going into the move for round Four. Barry Glendenning

Sachin Nakrani: what on dirt has gone wrong at Bolton ? All the latest news from the Conference

Listen to the husk on the FA Cup

2) Senseless timing impairs famous night for Exeter

It ought to beggar belief that the powers that be have done their utmost to make an ordeal out of “the worlds largest” petitioning tie in a glean short of traditional Cup romance. But here “weve been”, and if it seems self-defeating that supporters of a competition whose lustre remains difficult to maintain are being actively inconvenienced then it is worth reminding ourselves that we should not be remotely surprised by now. It would be fascinating to hear the logic of the BBCs decision to move this fixture to 7.55 pm on a Friday night 90 hours after the last train of the day departs Exeter St Davids station for the 250 -mile journey to Liverpool but that is the capability broadcasters have. It is gonna be a fine date when their requirements are drawn up with half a thinking for matchgoing love such as the 1,347 away partisans who will nonetheless attain the journey. Liverpool shall not be required to be require too much assistance in disposing of League Two resists but asking them to fulfil this tie-up three days after a Tuesday night League Cup semi-final at Stoke City was surely not necessary, either.

None of this scold should, of course, detract from a famous party for Exeter City and their excellent director, Paul Tisdale. Their league form four consecutive overcomes does not bode well for a amaze but they might just have caught Jurgen Klopp, who had to recall the almost-forgotten Tiago Ilori from his loan at Aston Villa the coming week to partly offset a lack of available centre-backs, and his team at a good time. St James Park will be rocking a sight that should make good video. It is just a shame that little else seem to be concern. Nick Ames

Klopp to arena young, inexperienced Liverpool against Exeter Puzzle-loving Oakley establishes Exeter clues how to defeat Liverpool

Paul Tisdale: hats entertainment. Picture: ProSports/ REX/ Shutterstock

3) Aston Villa should go for transgressed to avoid a shock

This tie yells sicken louder than most and perhaps Remi Garde would be well advised to make good usage of an early opportunity to experience belt-and-braces life in the Football League. Wycombe Wanderers, sixth in League Two, are still some style from filling Aston Villa on a level playing field but Gareth Ainsworth has assembled an impressive area that they are able to hope to bounce back from a home overcome to Morecambe last weekend. In Garry Thompson and Paul Hayes, Ainsworth could plain a strikeforce with a combined age of 67, but Wycombe aim for a high-energy style and Villa boosters may as well hope their team have entered into a same flavour of things. It has all been downhill since Theo Walcott opened the tallying for Arsenal in the 40 th instant of last seasons final; even if Wembley supports a few chastening recognitions, any pause from the weekly grind will seem like a comfort at the moment. History should encourage them to go for purposes: Villa obligated League Cup visits to Adams Park in 2003 and 2005, winning 5-0 and improbably 8-3. NA

Cole completes free convey to Coventry City from Aston Villa Garde craves Arsenals Debuchy to join Aston Villa

4) Resting players has burnt Allardyce in the past

The holders get their recent defence of the accolade underway and they do so in the knowledge that Sam Allardyce and Sunderland are not especially fixated on the booty. Allardyce has had a particularly chatty week but his decrees about the FA Cup dedicated pause for imagine. Of direction Im going to make changes, said Allardyce, pointing to the fact that Sunderland will play Swansea City on Wednesday as part of a full conference curriculum. If the Premier League decides to made a stupid fixture midweek when they dont bloody need to, then I havent got much choice.

The Premier League would argue that it does vicious is a requirement to, with Euro 2016 among the factors truncating the domestic calendar, but Allardyce is far from incorrect and this regrettable segment of planning provides a ready-made excuse for directors in need of Premier League points to give their big musicians a weekend off. It would be wise for Sunderland devotees to prepare apprehensions even lower than usual, then, although Allardyce might recall that it does not ever pay to rest actors in anticipation of future troubles. Two years ago, the then-West Ham manager reached nine changes fielding the youngsters Seb Lletget, Dan Potts, Danny Whitehead, George Moncur and Callum Driver for a third-round knot at Nottingham Forest, with a League Cup semi-final first leg against Manchester City merely three days away. If a 5-0 defeat at the City Ground was not entirely unexpected; the 6-0 thumping when senior participates recalled at the Etihad was emphatically not part of the masterplan. NA

Allardyce ready to rebuild Sunderland around Defoe Wenger presents Arsenal injury update and rulers Sanchez out

Sorry, your browser is unable to play this video.

Sam Allardyce didnt “ve been meaning to” disturbed Jurgen Klopp video

5) A jam-packed residence could swell Oxford Uniteds hopes

Things are seeming up for Oxford United, who have sold out their 12,000 -capacity Kassam Stadium for only the third time in its 15 -year biography with the prospect of murderous a Premier League nose. Michael Appletons team are third in League Two and on route both for advertising and the very highest position in 15 times. The midfielders Kemar Roofe and Liam Sercombe have scored 19 league purposes between them and both in particular the former West Brom youngster Roofe are attracting envious gazes from abroad. Oxford parcels a punch but they find themselves stingy, very: they have confessed merely eight durations in 12 residence plays and Swansea City might have wished for the purposes of an easier assignment before next Wednesdays face-off with fellow relegation contenders Sunderland. The proclamation that Alan Curtis will stay on as director until the end of the season has provided a timely shot of stability( irrespective of what it might advocate about the past months search for Garry Monks replacement) but it has not been able to has become a astound if subconscious were elsewhere. The Kassam roar tends to drift out of the three-sided stadium and across the car park behind its open terminate, but perhaps it will be more audible than ever on Sunday lunchtime. NA

Napoli reject PS1 4.1 m Swansea bid for Italys Gabbiadini

6) Cureton eyeing chance to put Everton to sword

Dagenham& Redbridge have led a captivated life in the previous two rounds of this years FA Cup. Despite trailing 2-0 after only seven times of their first round replay against Morecambe, they acquired it into the second round where they again needed a replay , not to mention extra-time, to get past lowly Whitehawk from English footballs sixth tier. The League Two golf-clubs reward for these exertions is a trip-up to Goodison Park, where they will face an Everton team that have played twice since the Daggers lodged it to Exeter on 2 January, although it remains to be seen how many first team regulars Roberto Martinez battlegrounds pondering his crew has Premier League visits to Manchester City and Chelsea in the week ahead.

One Dagenham& Redbridge player unlikely to be phased by the prospect of lining up at Goodison Park is Jamie Cureton, even if, like most of his team-mates, the 40 -year-old has never played there before. In his 22 nd season as health professionals footballer at his 14 th guild, the striker actually obliged his professional debut for Norwich City against Everton in 1994, but has stated that, despite all those miles on the clock, this is the biggest FA Cup competitor of their own lives. There arent many grounds I havent played at and before the reap I was looking at that and thinking what a great draw Everton would be, he said. Its another one to cross off the listing. One could be forgiven for presuming Dagenham& Redbridge would have a better fortune of overpowering their Premier League opposition if they were entertaining them at Victoria Road, but having failed to prevail a single league game there all season they may well favor their chances of notching up win on the road. BG

Still back at Dagenham for challenging third stint as administrator Besic, the cultured scrapper which is able turn out to be an Everton masterpiece

Dagenham& Redbridge Ayo Obileyes( second privilege) celebrates scoring his backs third goal against Whitehawk. Image: Steve Paston/ PA

7) FA Cup can provide Chelsea with sole possibility of trophy

Imagine the fun that is likely to be had with this fixture a few short weeks ago. The Twitter memes, the archway observations studying whether Chelsea Chelsea, get onto? could pull off an almighty third-round upset. There is less to wisecrack about now: Chelsea have, at last, strung together a run of improved sort in the Premier League and their relentlessly efficient old-fashioned methods has the potential to be rendering under Guus Hiddink. With neither relegation nor a Champions League place seeming realistic, a concerted tilt at the FA Cup might regard particular appeal and it would certainly placed a few noses out of joint if, given their lucks thus far, Chelsea emerged from this season with one more award than many of their challengers. What hope, then, for Mark Robins Scunthorpe United, who inspect Stamford Bridge for the first time since a 3-1 third-round defeat in 2005? There is always Bradfords stupefying 4-2 succes last-place January, which in retrospect was a harbinger for the lack of care prevalent in the first half of Chelseas 2015 -1 6. Another reverse against League One rivals would appear unlikely, but Chelsea must still treat hurdles like this seriously if their convalescence is to gather tempo. NA

Costa and Oscar separated after Chelsea instructing struggle Win( residence) tickets to Chelsea v West Bromwich Albion

There were issues on the training ground between Oscar and Diego Costa. Photo: Stefan Wermuth/ Reuters

8) Spurs v Leicester City a prequel to a Premier League showdown

It is a foible of the fixture register that this meeting will be repeated a merely three days later, when Leicester City return to White Hart Lane if they meet any degree in leaving at all for a Premier League accord. And not just any Premier League equal: few could have predicted that these two would both be strongly involved in the name hasten at the seasons midway degree, so it remains to be seen whether Sundays meeting determines a bout of darknes puppetry or a full-scale removal of the gauntlets. Mauricio Pochettino has balk wholesale a difference in bowl contenders so far this expression, citing a better understanding of his actors fitness than in his first season, and if the league claim searches up for grabs it is also exhibition to say that any Premier League slope that considers the FA Cup diligently stands a decent likelihood of being honored, too.

Leicester will certainly end to some degree from the formula that has served them so spectacularly in recent months Jamie Vardy will miss out through injury and Claudio Ranieri is very likely to remained others to minimise the the opportunities of their minor stutter becoming anything worse and maybe lead more peril of overstretching through duel on multiple figureheads. One sure thing is that neither director will be interested in prolonging the argument: expect this one to be settled entertainingly on the working day, with the victor having sharpened their stomach by learning off a believable adversary for the trophy. NA

Riyad Mahrez: The Gallery Spurs on verge of signing teenager Shilow Tracey from Ebbsfleet

9) Big spending Derby County there to be shot at

Hartlepool United are currently in the end of a major stun last season when Blyth Spartans, of the Northern Premier League, beat them at Victoria Park in the second round. More of the same seemed on the cards when Salford City , non-league favorites du jour, travelled to the north-east in December but Ronnie Moores team narrowly persisted after a replay and can now are hoping to receiving antagonists whom there is rather less push to defeat.

Derby County are surely there to be shot at: the most recent signs of Nick Blackman and Abdoul Camara returned the Championship slopes spend on transmit fees alone this season up to around PS26m and they are leaving little to occasion in their quest of promotion to the Premier League. Their one-point advantage over third-placed Hull is not something Paul Clement and corporation will want to let slip after that various kinds of spend; Hartlepool, then, will be eager to capitalise if Derbys focus sways and in the 19 -year-old midfielder Brad Walker they have a knack who is surely not much longer for the lower reachings of League Two. The home unit will need a significant improvement on their recent formation, though. They have lost their last four league plays and the danger is that Derby bankrolled by Mel Morris, whose companionship, King, developed the Candy Crush video game will resemble minors in a sweet store. NA

Karanka and Clement, the former Madrid No2s, share No1 target

Scott Fenwick employs Hartlepool ahead in additional time against Salford, helping them on their channel to a third-round meeting with Derby. Photo: Alex Livesey/ Getty Images

10) Championship competitors will have concentrated elsewhere

The money they have invested already is a statement of intent; some of the summing-ups Championship squads are compensating are astronomical. So said Sean Dyche shortly before his Burnley team resumed life in the second rank following their relegation from the Premier League. He was speaking with particular reference to Middlesbrough and Derby County, which is now occupy first and second place in Championship, while his own Burnley team are reasonably positioned back in fifth, 10 points off the pace-setters. With so much money up for grabs just for being in the Premier League next season, its hard to thought anyone at Middlesbrough or Burnley holding even a single boo about the outcome of their competitor at the Riverside, as long as promotion is still a alternative. Any kind of FA Cup run for either team would be a distraction, but not by any means one that is welcome. BG

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