#AND ALL I'D HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT WAS WHETHER I WAS MAKING EVERYONE HAPPY ENOUGH WITH MY NOOK AND/OR MOUTH

[bridalribbon]

　𝜗𝜚　𝓶y method for shifting every time i try　.

(　✶　)　there is no method !

okay, fine, there is a method, but it's going to disappoint everyone who thinks shifting requires some elaborate forest ritual and affirmations repeated exactly 111 times while facing magnetic north. here's my earth – shattering, revolutionary process ( /s ) :

first, i sometimes visualize — and i mean sometimes, because half the time i can't be bothered and it works anyway. i used to use alunir's adhd method as a guide for this, and while i don't follow it religiously anymore, it might be fun or helpful for those of you who need somewhere to start! when i do visualize, it's not some cinematic masterpiece playing in my head with perfect lighting and orchestral scoring. i'm not painting the sistine chapel of shifting scenarios. it's just enough sensory detail to make my desired reality feel more solid and immediate than whatever surface i'm lying on. the scent of coffee that isn't the tesco espresso capsules sitting in my kitchen. the weight and texture of clothes that fit my body differently. voices i want to hear calling my name. get a little delusional with it if you have to. imagine whatever you want. whatever works for you.

second, i assume i'm already there — not hope with desperate fingers crossed, not try with gritted teeth and white knuckles, not attempt to convince myself through sheer force of will. i assume it the way i assume the sun will rise tomorrow, with a bone – deep certainty that doesn't require proof, validation, or a peer review study. it's not a belief i have to maintain or a thought i have to think really hard — it's just a fact that exists in my reality now. don’t give yourself a headache.

third, i'm there, because i was never actually anywhere else to begin with.

that's it. that's the whole method. three steps that aren't really steps because they all happen simultaneously in the space between one breath and the next, like recognizing something that was always true. the visualization is purely optional — it's just training wheels for your assumption, something to help your mind grab onto the reality you know is yours. think of it like the ramp that helps you get onto the motorway, useful but not the destination itself. but the assumption? that's where the real work happens. that's where you stop negotiating with doubt. this is the part that breaks people's brains and sends them spiralling off into reddit comment sections: you don't shift to your desired reality. you realize you're already there and stop pretending you're somewhere else. you stop performing the exhausting theatre of being stuck. every time you worry about whether you've shifted yet, every time you check for symptoms like you're diagnosing yourself with a condition, every time you analyze your awareness like you're conducting a scientific experiment on your own consciousness, you're reinforcing the assumption that you're still stuck here, still separate from where you want to be.

i hope this is helpful, and i'd be happy to elaborate on anything here if needed <3 but seriously, go shift !

[bugs1nmybrain]

✨️ L Lawliet w/ a Shy & Insecure Reader Headcanons ✨️

Notes: I got real specific here. I need some validation haha. I swear if L ever complimented me I'd implode and then explode like I've done many times in the DS game (don't make fun of me >:<)

I'm adding pink text and sparkles to the title. Cope with it DN twt

Warnings: 18+!!! There is some sexy content, no gendered terms or pronouns. I tried being inclusive with the sexy stuff. Talks about poor self-esteem and insecurities. L being his rude ass self at one point. Reader described as quiet. I did indeed write L as a sweetheart, and I don't regret it one bit! :D. Not proofread

For starters, shy isn't a problem for L. He appreciates that you're quiet and relatively polite. It makes it easier for him to get away with dating you because he knows you're not going to be obnoxious around headquarters, and there's a good chance you'll never even mention that you're his partner

He finds it vry cute. Especially when you stumble over your words when he flirts with you. His pride is very comfy with you.

You are a perfect parallel play lover!!! He's grateful that you don't pester him when he's busy, but he doesn't mind you being around him. You can draw, do homework, write, play video games, anything. He just appreciates your company. He's also 100% paying attention out of his peripheral vision.

But because you're quiet, sometimes you don't share all of your thoughts with him and it can make for a satisfying relationship. L sure as shit isn't disclosing a lot of stuff, so he sees it as even

A lot of your secrets are insecurities, though. You worry a lot about your competency as a romantic partner. Whether it's your intelligence, physical beauty, personality, interests, anything really. You're always anxious that you're not enough, and not enough for him.

L knows well that you lack confidence. He's torn, actually, because he wants to see you become more sure of yourself and he'll try to help. He teaches you skills when he has time and makes sure to compliment you when you do something good. Sometimes he stretches the truth in his praises just to make you feel better. He knows you value his opinion a lot.

However, your insecure nature is an easy opening for him to get away with a lot. Nothing that serious, but secret tests are a given with L, and he does like to test if you'll push through him not given you the validation he knows you want. It actually does make him feel like 10% bad, though, and he'll make up for it.

He understands why you're insecure, but at the same time, he thinks it's silly. Especially when you admit to him that you're worried about your physical appearance or sexual abilities. It's in those moments he just wants to tell you to stop because "have you seen me, y/n?"

But yes please flatter his ego

When you started sleeping together it actually was pretty smooth and natural

I truly believe L was a virgin until you, so he probably wasn't much more confident than you

The doom of adult virginity/inexperience is that everyone expects you to be pornographic by now, and for an insecure person that can be very demanding

L doesn't expect that and won't be disappointed by something slow and "vanilla." He likes that, honestly. But of course, if/whenever you're ready for something more spicy, he's very open to communicating about it

This guy is just happy to touch you, period

If you fumble because you're nervous, he's not upset, but he'll redirect you with affirming words

He does admittedly get irritated by consistent nagging and the self-deprecating comments you make. It annoys him after a bit. He'll likely disengage to avoid hurting your feelings, but if you're persistent, he'll give it to you straight.

"The only thing you should be insecure about is that you're a broken record."

Fight the tears

It actually does make him upset when you doubt him and his love for you. It makes him feel like you don't trust him. L is aware that he's deceptive by nature, but he wants you to trust that he values you. He certainly wouldn't be in a committed relationship with you if his feelings weren't genuine

So he reminds you. Again. And again. That he wants you in his life and treasures you

You're lucky that he loves you so much

Sometimes, you'll go through periods of isolating from him because you're afraid of bothering him. Trust me. He's glad to have time to work, but he does pick up on your distance quick

You're so afraid of asking him for attention

or even just a bite of his cake. He always offers, tho.

But yea. L is a busy guy and comfortable in seclusion, so he isn't that clingy. He can go a long time without checking in on you, which doesn't help the paranoia

When he decides to take a break for once, usually his first instinct is to either 1. Get coffee or a treat, or 2. Make a bee line to see you!!

OR 3. BRING YOU FOOD TO SHARE

Know that he loves you much more than most things. You are his priority, even if his work takes precedence at times.

He'll attempt to build your trust over time because he understands how hard it is to believe in someone's honesty. It'll get better, and you'll likely start to feel more self-assured with him. L talks a lot, but he believes actions speak louder than words, so he'll show you how much he loves you through the little things because you light up his world after an exhausting day full of murder and nonstop thinking. You're home to him and he wants you to feel the same way about him.

[too-much-tma-stuff]

Beach Episode (Part 19)

Previous | Masterpost | Next

Danny and Jason talked out their issues and dealt with it. Jason didn’t think he’d fuck up again, he’d felt so fucking bad, but Danny didn’t trust that. Which was fair, even if it hurt, he was going to have to prove that he meant it and could hold to it even when he was angry. He needed to get into therapy too, he’d been putting it off because he was scared, and protective of his identity, so much of the shit he’d seen and done was so hard to explain in a civilian situation.

But now that he was on slightly better terms with the JL he could prevail himself of one of their therapists. That ended up being the favour that Danny demanded from them was providing Jason with a therapist, one that wouldn’t be too judgmental of his… ‘methods’. They asked for Wonder Woman’s advice on that, which she was very happy to provide, relieved that Jason was facing up to his bad behaviour and taking steps to make it right. She’d been worried she was going to have to physically knock some sense into him.

The other favour that Danny asked for, not of the JL but from Jason, was not to complain about the family vacation that was being planned between Dick, Tim, Danny, and Alfred. Jason still didn’t love the idea but Danny gave him puppy dog eyes and insisted that it was needed to make him forgive Jason for his slip up. Necessary to make things right with his family and moving on, so he accepted it.

It took a lot of arranging and planning to get the family on vacation. They had to find a time everyone was available, find people they trusted to cover their patrols or cities, and of course agree on a destination. That was harder than you would expect, especially when Bruce got involved and tried to insist it should be in the deep woods somewhere and be a training exercise more than anything.

In the end he was shouted down and it was decided that they were going to go to a beach somewhere warm and sunny. Far enough away from any of their usual haunts that they wouldn’t feel the urge to work as long as there weren’t any natural disasters and Tim was kept off his ipad. Since it was a family vacation Danny invited Ellie and Dan too, though he wasn’t sure that Dan would come. Half of him hoped he wouldn’t because having Dan there was bound to be complicated, but they had decided to be family so Danny was going to put his money where his mouth was. 

Dan had been doing well anyway, he hadn’t missed any check ins and hadn’t caused any chaos in space. So he at least deserved an invite, whether he wanted to come or not. They had a check in two weeks before the trip so Danny brought it up with him then.

“A family vacation huh?” Dan asked, they were ‘sitting’ on a broken satellite which was still orbiting earth through inertia.

“Ya, God knows the Wayne's need it. And honestly so do I. Ellie will be coming too, and you're welcome too if you want to,” Danny said with a little shrug.

“And draw more attention from the GIW onto both of you?” Dan asked skeptically.

“Ya, but they already know Phantom is back and working with the Justice League now. I really don't think they're brave enough to touch us now. And if they try to, with all three of us together with the bats? Frankly I'd like to see them try. Maybe it would give the Justice League the push they need to really give them the smack down.” 

Dan snorted a little at Danny, he still didn't expect that ferocity from his younger self. “Ya I guess so,” he agreed with a crooked little smile.

“But if that was an excuse and you just don't want to come, that's fine. I don't want to push you, I just don't want you to feel left out since we decided we're family now,” Danny explained.

“Nah, I want to come. I want to meet my future brother in law,” Dan said with an absolutely feral smile.

“Oh dear,” Danny said faintly. “That doesn't sound good. Is it too late to uninvite you?” 

“Oh absolutely,” Dan cackled wickedly. “If you're going to be my little brother I should get to vet your boyfriend,” he teased, reaching over to ruffle Danny's hair and laughing when Danny smacked his hand away.

“Fine, you'll be a better judge than some people since I'm assuming we have the same opinions about violence?” He asked, glancing at Dan.

“I think I'm probably even more down for it then you are, but ya. Why?”

“Batman tried to stage an intervention about Jason hitting me. Trying to explain to them that I was totally fine with it and kinda liked it suuucked,” Danny groaned, flopping back dramatically as Dan laughed at him.

“Poor you,” Dan said, entirely unsympathetic. Danny flipped him off. “I'll probably give him shit about it.”

“Just don't scare him off. I really like this guy. If you pull anything I swear I'll spend the rest of our eternity making sure you never get a date!” 

“Sheesh, that's a serious threat kid! As long as he's not a wimp I won't scare him off. If I do scare him off he wasn’t a good fit for you in the first place,” Dan pointed out reasonably.

“Fine, I'll be keeping an eye on you though,” Danny warned.

“Of course you will, I'd expect nothing less after everything I've done,” Dan agreed dryly. “I'm surprised you're letting me be around your new found family at all.”

“Ya, well, you're one of my new found family as well.”

“Shit.”

“If you didn't want to be part of my found family you should have killed me when you had the chance!” 

“IS THAT A FUCKING MEME?!”

------------

All the Wayne’s could have asked their respective flying friends to give them a lift to the resort, but it had been decided no kryptonians were invited. They were trying to keep things to their family, though Dick was bringing Kori, that was fine they had been together off and on for years and were well settled together this time. She might as well be an in-law already. So she would be flying Dick in from Bludhaven, and everyone else was going to fly out from Gotham in the Waynes’ private jet. Well, the Waynes and Babs and Steph, who had taken a little more convincing to come, getting past their insistence they weren’t actually family being the trick. Thankfully the fact that the phantom siblings were coming too helped them see it wasn’t only a trip for the Waynes, and with different heroes and allies found to cover protecting Gotham they were bundled onto the private jet as well. 

 Which Danny and Ellie teased Bruce and Tim relentlessly about owning, Jason snickering in the background and egging on the two ghostly siblings in their teasing. They deserved it, no matter how much Bruce tried to defend that it was expected of him to have a private jet and he needed it for business! 

Teasing didn’t stop them from enjoying it though, Ellie chasing Tim around the isles, with Alfred chiding but not actually trying to stop them from having their fun and being kids for once.  Danny spent half the time exploring and stealing any snacks he found, and half the time murmuring in Jason’s ear about how they should steal the jet to join the mile high club. It was sweet torture and Jason did not want it to stop even as he shifted awkwardly and tried desperately to think unsexy thoughts so he wouldn’t get a boner surrounded by his family! Thank fuck Dick wasn’t here, the knowing smirks he’d be shooting the two of them would be too much.

It was a 16 hour flight, and once Ellie and Tim tired themselves out and fell asleep Bruce pulled out a sleep mask and settled in. Danny gave them this, it was much more comfortable to sleep in, and Jason and Danny slept soundly, at least until Ellie got bored and pounced on Danny. They phased out through the wall of the plane to go for a fly, racing the jet and flying loops around it until Ellie got tired and Danny had to help her back into the jet when she started to fall behind. 

Everyone else had started to wake up while they were gone, so by the time they got back it was just in time to have a family breakfast, and talk about what they were going to do once they landed. They had booked the entire top floor of the resort for privacy, which Danny thought was kind of overkill, but these were The Bats, they were incredibly security minded people, so he didn’t argue about it. Danny was mostly excited about swimming, this was a beach vacation after all!

Finally they landed, and grabbed as much of their stuff as they could from the plane before the bellhops could get them, as if all the staff hadn’t already been vetted by Babs. They were only staying for a week so they didn’t have so much they couldn’t reasonably carry it, and Danny suspected at least Tim had some stuff in his bags he would not want anyone else to see. He was going to keep an eye on the younger man to make sure that he hadn’t smuggled any work with him on vacation. 

They piled out of the plane, chattering excitedly about the vacation, Dick coming onto the plane to help Babs on the slightly too steep ramp from the plane. Kori was waiting for them on the tarmac with a warm smile, taking a couple of the heavier bag.

“We already picked out her room on the left side. I suspect Jason and Danny will want to be on the right, and the… single, and younger members of the family should be in the middle so we all have some place,” Kori suggested. 

“Kori!” Dick chided, though he clearly wasn’t actually shocked. Actually those who’d known the two of them for a while knew that was far more delicately put then she might have said it a couple years ago.

“What?” She said, blinking her bright green eyes innocently at Dick. “This is a romantic destination, and we love each other, we are only doing what is surely expected of a loving romantic union. I doubt your father wants to hear-”

“YES thank you Kori you’re right. We’ll make sure you and Dick, and Jason and Danny have your privacy,” Bruce promised.

Before the conversation could continue Ellie shrieked and dropped her bags, taking off running away from the group. It startled everyone, but hackles smoothed immediately when they spotted Dan, strolling across the lot to meet her at a more casual pace. He rolled his eyes but there was a smile on his face as he bent down to scoop Ellie up before she could headbutt him in the gut at full sprint. He was wearing regular clothes, a black shirt and pants with white stripes down the side, and his fiery hair had been gathered into a low ponytail. He still looked obviously inhuman with his grey-green skin and red eyes, but there were all sorts of meta-humans around and he didn’t look like a supervillain at least. 

Ellie scrambled from in his arms to onto his shoulders as he grumbled at her without any real heat behind it. He shrugged his shoulders, making her squeak and hold on tight as he strolled over to the rest of the group.

“I’m glad you could make it,” Danny said, approaching Dan and patting his arm.

“Hey I told you I would,” Dan said ruffling Danny’s hair and ignoring the way the humans around them shifted nervously. Danny was either ignoring it as well or hadn’t noticed the nerves.

“I don’t believe we’ve met!” Kori said cheerfully, holding out her hand to shake. 

“Hey, I’m Dan. I’m these two’s big brother, by technicality,” Dan joked, gesturing to Danny and Ellie with his free hand, shaking her hand and squeezing too hard. He looked impressed when her smile only brightened and she squeezed back just as hard. “And who might you be?”

“I’m Kori, I’m Dick’s partner,” She said brightly. “You seem strong, we should spar some time soon.”

“I’d like that,” Dan agreed with a shark's grin. Grunting and dropping the smile when Danny elbowed him in the side. 

“Behave,” Danny grumbled at him, getting a growl and an eye roll in return, before his gaze landed on Jason. 

“And you must be Danny’s boyfriend huh?” He asked, letting go of Kori’s hand and offering it to Jason.

“Ya, I am. It’s nice to meet you. He warned me about you,” Jason said, standing up straight and shaking Dan’s hand firmly, trying not to wince when he squeezed it far too tightly. 

“I’m sure he did. I warned me about messing with you too,” Dan cackled, letting go of Jason’s hand before it could crack and shoving his hands in his pockets. 

“Right, well now that everyone’s met each other let’s head inside hm?” Bruce interrupted trying to shoo them all towards the door. They were starting to attract attention standing out in the open like this. “We should pick out our rooms and get comfortable.”

“Ellie, how do you feel about sharing a room with Dan?” Danny asked, glancing up at his young clone, still perched on Dan’s broad shoulders. 

“I don’t need a babysitter!” Both Dan, and Ellie said at the same time before looking at each other, startled as Danny laughed.

“You’d both be absolutely terrible babysitters,” He said fondly. He expected them to get into a good deal of chaos together, but he did think that Ellie would keep Dan from killing anyone, or get Danny if things got completely out of control. 

“Fine, we’ll share,” Dan sighed, and Ellie nodded. 

“Thanks guys,” Danny said, smiling at his siblings before grabbing Jason’s hand and tugging him towards the door. “Come on, let’s go find the most extravagant room we can!”

--------------

There was a bit of a scramble for rooms, not that there weren’t plenty of rooms, but Step, Dick, and Tim were petty and silly and argued over the ‘best’ rooms. And of course once they started Ellie had to get in on the action. Danny and Jason left the younger ones (and Dick) to their squabbling and went to pick out their own room as far away from the rest as they could manage. They found a lovely one with an airy, beachy theme and a window seat looking out onto the ocean.

“It’s beautiful here,” Danny said, sitting down on the padded bench in front of the window and making grabby hands at Jason.

“Is it,” Jason chuckled, going to sit with Danny, who practically dived into Jason’s arms. “I wouldn’t want to live in a place like this, but it is very nice to visit.”

“Of course you wouldn’t, you're a Gothemite and a bat! If it’s not a little close, dark, or gloomy you stand out like a sore thumb,” Danny teased, nuzzling against the underside of Jason’s jaw, who laughed along. “I like our home and our nest though, it’s cozy,” Danny added before Jason could get insecure about it.

“Me too, do you want to unpack first or go exploring?” Jason asked softly.

“As much as I want to go exploring, I think we had better unpack before anyone tries to kick us out of our room by throwing out our bags,” Danny said with a put upon sigh, going nearly boneless against Jason’s chest. 

“You know you’re going to have to get up for us to unpack, right?”

“Noooo!”

-----------

The resort really was beautiful, and since they’d rented an entire floor it wasn’t as crowded as they were sure it usually was. Danny had never been to a place like this and he intended to make the most of it, all of it! The beach, the spa, and the incredibly fucking fancy restaurant and bar where he and Jason could actually drink since the Maldieves actually had a reasonable drinking age! 

Over the course of the week they got couples messages, got so drunk they had to lean on each other to get back to their room, and ordered far too much room service. But undoubtedly the beach was absolutely the main attraction. They spent a lot of time there, to the point Danny got a tan, and Jason was very glad he didn’t burn like Bruce did, who spent most of the second day laying on his stomach in bed with Alfred scolding him about not refreshing his sunscreen after swimming. On the second day Danny remembered he didn’t strictly have to breathe! And Jason spent the rest of the day sitting on the beach while Danny (and Ellie or Dan in turns) disappeared into the water for hours and came back to tell him about everything they saw.

On the third day Jason rented some scuba equipment so he could go down with his boyfriend and see all the wonders he’d been so excited about. At least the ones in shallower waters, he couldn’t follow Danny deeper where the pressure got too much, when Danny realized that he stuck to the shallower areas. By the time they got back to shore Jason was exhausted and very ready for supper, which was a family affair every night of the trip. It was really nice, since Alfred didn’t have to cook he could actually join them and he kept it from being too rowdy. 

They had to push tables together to accommodate the whole family, but the Waynes had more than enough money to get away with it and establish an extra long table for themselves for the entire week of their stay. They tended to eat late, which worked too because there were fewer people for them to disturb with their chatter and chaos, and the eleven of them were usually more than enough for the kitchen to contend with since most of them were big eaters. The dinners were really nice, it didn’t have the baggage of being at the manor, and though they’d met up in smaller groups all of them (minus Kate who had opted out) had never been in the same place. 

It was the perfect opportunity for… something, something that Dick unfortunately beat Jason too on the third night, during dessert when he got up from the table, and got down on one knee in front of Kori. Silence fell over the entire restaurant as Jason bit back a groan and quickly readjusted his expectations to be happy for his brother. 

“Koriand'r, you and I have been together for a long time, and we’ve been through a lot of shit. But never have I not been happy you were there with me for it. You’ve made all of it easier by letting me be by your side, and I hope you’ll let me stick by you for the rest of our lives. Will you marry me?” 

“Yes!” Kori yelped, holding out her hand and letting him put the ring on her finger before she grabbed his wrist and his collar and hauled him in for a passionate kiss as the family cheered and everyone around clapped politely. “You’ll have to come with me to pick out a ring for you as well My Love,” Kori told him warmly while Dick grinned like an idiot. 

“Congratulations!” Steph cheered, practically leaping over the table to tackle both of them as Bruce ordered a few bottles of the best champagne the resort could offer and everyone else lined up to congratulate them as well. Besides Dan, who was being ignored as he grumbled in the corner about how ostentatious and cliche the whole thing was. 

Hey, maybe if Danny secretly shared some of those thoughts Jason had dodged a bullet not being able to propose on this trip. He’d come up with a new plan, one Danny might even like better.

[nanabansama]

119 Thoughts

The recent chapter was... good!! Great, even!! We got a lot of answers and the new developments felt straightforward enough to follow. Still not fully comfortable with my interpretation yet, but honestly I'm just happy to be along for the ride.

Anyway, I wanted to write my thoughts down just to make sure I have everything straight going forward. There's a lot going on and some of my older theories have been debunked!

First, I'd like to point out what I think is pretty obvious and say that Kou must be possessed right now. The specifics are unclear but in my head this is still Kou, he's just being manipulated by the Red House or something. One thing I find interesting though is that he's overall really innocent... he doesn't do anything to put Nene in danger that she doesn't do herself. Nene is the one who decides to risk it all and talk to Amane, after all. The only thing I can say Kou did bad is separate her from the group and take her to Amane. Whatever is controlling Kou might be aware that Nene would drop her defenses around Amane and use that to their advantage.

Mitsuba's part in all of this is still a mystery, but I have to wonder if he will try to trick the Akane/Aoi/Teru trio whenever we jump back to them. I'm suspecting that they won't convene with Nene right away, though I have no idea how Nene will fare in the next chapter... (could she join Mitsuba and Kou and become the Red House's puppet!? I could easily see her tricking Aoi!)

Anyway, moving onto Yugi-sensei, I loved the glimpse into his headspace we got in this chapter. It seems like he's under the delusion everyone (and I mean EVERYONE) is happier in this timeline, which is quite interesting. It almost makes me wonder if the Clock Keepers made him like this to ensure the timeline stayed this way. They told Baby Amane that the future changed, after all, which is... honestly quite disturbing. While I think it was foolish for the Clock Keepers' goal to be to get rid of Tsukasa in the first place, I don't think they'd make such a big mistake by telling Amane the future changed and traumatizing him. The possibility that the Clock Keepers made Amane this way for the good of the world would be a thrilling twist, I think!

I also think this could explain his other curious behavior. Many have wondered why Amane spreads rumors about Tsukasa-kun and why he smirks when school kids summon Tsukasa-kun, and it seems the reason is because he thinks Tsukasa is happy this way. The fact that this Tsukasa is the age Tsukasa disappeared, too, probably helps with this because Amane might still be under the assumption that the Tsukasa who came back after their 4th birthday was a fake. Now obviously, this Amane doesn't have all his memories yet, but it's extremely likely they're just buried inside of him and--unbeknownst to him--influencing his current actions. Either way, I think it's clear that Amane is under the delusion that Tsukasa is happy torturing kids at school. (...and who's to say whether he is or isn't!!!)

All of the souls trapped in the Red House might be in a similar situation, where Amane is under the delusion he's making them happy. I wonder if his parents are part of them...? I'm just thinking that Kou's cheerfulness this chapter is really relevant. He's so happy to just be with Nene and seems to have zero worries at all. It's honestly kinda creepy, when you consider how he was in the previous chapter!

Now hear me out. I'm not usually one to wish harm on Nene, but it would be interesting if Nene got captured and got to meet Amane's parents, assuming they got trapped in the Red House too. I proposed the theory that Kou has just been brainwashed but it could very well be a fake Kou, and if she got to team up with Kou and Mitsuba I think that'd make for an amusing trio. Especially since we have another trio in the house right now with Akane, Teru and Aoi. We could have Nene trapped and trying to escape while a fake evil Nene tries to trick them... that could be so fun!!! (Writing fanfiction at this point lol)

If we go along with the theory that Kou is fake, perhaps the souls trapped in the Red House also have fake body doubles? You'll notice that they are very obviously not happy, considering the way they urged Mitsuba to run away and escape. But I really cannot think for another explanation for Kou's behavior in this chapter. Amane's ominous line about everyone being happy plus Kou being so cheerful just feel so connected! Perhaps the happiness once instilled in the poor souls trapped in the Red House eventually wore off, proving how fake their happiness was in the first place. (Or perhaps I've gone off the deep end.)

In any case, I really wonder what the point of oddly cheerful fake/brainwashed Kou is. I can only assume it's to try and trick Nene into thinking this new world is better. The motives don't seem very malicious, despite all the harm it's bringing. Amane genuinely wants people to be happy, and I think the Red House is working with him to make his dreams a disturbing reality.

I just wonder where Tsukasa is... is he trapped in the Red House, too? Or is he trapped inside the school, inside Tsukasa-kun? What if he's trapped as a child, unable to grow up, because the innocent little brother that left Amane on their birthday is the only true Tsukasa in Amane's eyes? How well did the Clock Keepers do at getting rid of Tsukasa, anyway...? He can't really be gone, can he!?

Ahh, but anyway!!! Thanks for reading if you got this far. And if Amane really prefers Baby Tsukasa then I suppose I can't complain. I mean, just look at him!!

He is so freakin' CUTE!!!! Grahhh!!!! ♡♡♡♡

[poohsources]

🐝  *  ―  𝑨𝑽𝑨𝑻𝑨𝑹: 𝑻𝑯𝑬 𝑳𝑨𝑺𝑻 𝑨𝑰𝑹𝑩𝑬𝑵𝑫𝑬𝑹 𝑺𝑬𝑵𝑻𝑬𝑵𝑪𝑬 𝑺𝑻𝑨𝑹𝑻𝑬𝑹𝑺.

❛  i'm angry at myself!  ❜ ❛  it's easy to do nothing, it's hard to forgive.  ❜ ❛  you miscalculated. i love them more than i fear you.  ❜ ❛  there is nothing wrong with letting the people who love you help you.  ❜ ❛  but now you're not letting yourself feel anything. i know sometimes it hurts more to hope and it hurts more to care. but you have to promise me that you won't stop caring.  ❜ ❛  my own mother thought i was a monster ... she was right of course, but it still hurt.  ❜ ❛  in the darkness, hope is something you give yourself.  ❜ ❛  never forget who you are, for surely the world won't.  ❜ ❛  why am i so bad at being good?  ❜ ❛  it is important to draw wisdom from different places. if you take it from only one place, it becomes rigid and stale.  ❜ ❛  sometimes the best way to solve your own problems is to help someone else.  ❜ ❛  and now you have come to the crossroads of destiny. it's time for you to choose.  ❜ ❛  you may not always see the light at the end of the tunnel, but if you keep moving, you will come to a better place.  ❜ ❛  protection and power are overrated. i think you are very wise to choose happiness and love.  ❜ ❛  get over here, [ name ]. being part of the group also means being part of group hugs.  ❜ ❛  stop! stop it right now! what's wrong with you? we don't have time for fun and games with the war going on.  ❜ ❛  i'm too young to die!  ❜ ❛  in my country, we exchange a pleasant 'hello' before asking questions.  ❜ ❛  i didn't know what or when, but i knew i'd know it when i knew it!  ❜ ❛  the past can be a great teacher.  ❜ ❛  when we hit our lowest point, we are open to the greatest change.  ❜ ❛  there really is no fathoming the depths of my hatred for this place.  ❜ ❛  failure is only the opportunity to try again, only more wisely this time.  ❜ ❛  i wanted to take out all of my anger on them. but i couldn't. i don't know if it's because i'm too weak ... or if it's because i'm strong enough not to.  ❜ ❛  look [ name ], you're going to fail a lot before things work out. even though you will fail over and over again, you have to try every time. you can't quit because you're afraid you might fail.  ❜ ❛  while it is always best to believe in oneself, a little help from others can be a great blessing.  ❜ ❛  you must never give in to despair. allow yourself to slip down that road, and you surrender to your lowest instincts.  ❜ ❛  if we knew each other back then, do you think we could have been friends too?  ❜ ❛  you know, [ name ], i don't care what anyone else says about you. you're pretty smart.  ❜ ❛  if i try, i fail. if i don't try, i'm never going to get it.  ❜ ❛  let your anger out, and then let it go. forgive him.  ❜ ❛  pride is not the opposite of shame, but rather its source. true humility is the only antidote to shame.  ❜ ❛  life happens wherever you are, whether you make it or not.  ❜ ❛  the greatest illusion of this world is the illusion of separation. things you think are separate and different are actually one and the same.  ❜ ❛  you stand alone. that has always been your greatest weakness.  ❜ ❛  bad skin? normal teenagers worry about bad skin, i don't have that luxury.  ❜ ❛  in my dream, we were right in the middle of the invasion, and you stopped to use the bathroom. we die because of your tiny bladder.  ❜ ❛  you need to find someone who waits and listens before striking.  ❜ ❛  everyone has to be treated like they're worth giving a chance.  ❜ ❛  i don't need luck, though. i don't want it. i've always had to struggle and fight, and that's made me strong. it's made me who i am.  ❜

[auguryofjellyfish]

random day 25 thoughts let's go

another otherwordly Tetro Friday? what's with chap 4, I swear, so far it's been a stream of endless bangers.

first of all, I hope Hiroaki and Tamba had a good day 😭 it was strange to not see Hiroaki at all....

[Oyasumi]

is that a goddamn Omori reference?? naw, it's not, but that's where everyone's mind went first and mine as well lol.

Oyasumi, oyaaasumi, close your eyes and you'll leave this dream....

normally something like this would make me worried, but honestly? i'm not. because Wada is not going to die. I'm not even considering the possibility. he's going to be okay. he might suffer but he's definitely going to make it. i'm not even scared of his death at all cause it's not gonna happen (except if they kill everyone in endgame). if he survived chapter 3, he can survive anything.

either way....such a sweet episode <3 loved the amount of focus Wada is getting like, THAT'S MY GOAT!!! I LOVE WADA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! please give him all the love and hugs.

HE'S NOT EATEN FOR 3 DAYS!! ?!??! Wada...i thought he'd not eat one day at a time, but, three...? no wonder he's crashing again. if the starvation motive hits, nnnnn holy shit but no he's going to be okay. trust.

I still need time to fully process [Bruise] but good lord, while watching it made my chest feel so heavy it felt like it was caving in. fucking concave. just. Mai. Ojima. it was so painful and so heavy but, i was overflowing with pride for them both. they're so incredibly strong. i love Ojima sm....

[Refulgence Post Mortem]

he loved Kamimura. he loved him. he didn't need to say it at all. i just knew from the way he talked about him. the way his voice went soft, the fondness, the light amusement... how Kamimura was stubborn, argumentative, funny, smart, kind... he made him sound so special. he painted such a lovely picture with his words.... and he had so much to say about him. he thought and worried about him a lot, Kamimura was interesting to him (!!!!!) ..... I hope Kamimura at least could tell that Ken really really liked him...he probably did.

he didn't always care about what Ken was talking about but he cared enough to pretend, always...this just...just. Kamimura cared so fucking much too.

on one hand, this is kinda nice, because Ken would never say all of this to Kamimura, so if he were alive we'd never hear Ken gush about him... but jesus, I'd rather have him back....

he was worried about Kamimura because of his suicidal tendencies, and when it seemed like he wanted to live again, he was just so relieved... the depth with which he said that, I just. wow. I know... I KNOW!!! I KNOW HE WAS GETTING BETTER! I know, Ken...!

Ken was so proud of him. so happy for him, so moved. HE WAS TURNING HIS EYES TOWARDS THE FUTURE!!! he tried to end it so many times because life was an unchanging never-ending hell BUT the instant he felt like he might not be doomed forever after all, that he could have people who love him, that he could find a place for himself in this world once more, he wanted to try again, he wanted TO LIVE.

and then she took him away.

...what the fuck. what the fuck, it's not fair...it's not fair. i can't get fucking over this, i can't, i can't. i can't. fuck. me. fuck...i hate this...

...I've seen a lot of discussion on whether Ken is gonna die this chapter. it's still a little too early to say for sure, but in my opinion, nah. he doesn't seem like he'd be a victim right now. he is a little vulnerable, but frankly in these people's place I would be scared to go at him cause he's tall, strong and has nothing left to lose.

as for whether he'd kill...mmmnnnneehhh.......no...? not in chap 4 at least. he is in a really bad way, and that "she destroyed....everything." was so good, it sounded really dark and wrathful, but, yanno. i'm mostly just side-eyeing the "everything"...

if okazaki was somehow still alive i would def be concerned about him going for her head but lol. that's taken care of already. i guess it's not impossible for him to find another outlet for his anger, COUGH watari COUGH but still, he is more depressed than angry.

he said "there's nothing left." he still has his family but he can't even take them into consideration right now. that's what he truly feels- utter desolation. how could he have the motivation to plan a murder in this state? when he "lost everything"? i'd be much more worried if he continued with his total isolation arc but with this episode, he's not too far gone. just feeling overwhelming malaise. doesn't help that he's off his meds.

then again, we might be going back to unintentional murders, so it's not out of the question. it would just be weird for Ken to try to kill everyone on purpose??

also he won't try to kill himself people 💔 he won't. although.

i was 100% sure he wouldn't before this ep, and now i'm just a little less sure. 🙁

everything is gray now.

the biggest thing i took away from this week's episodes...I really...really don't want anyone else to die...I really don't. none of them. not Ojima. not Hayashi. not Hiroaki. not Wada. not Hasegawa. not Watari. not Tamba. not Yanagi. not Hama. none of them. i really don't want anyone to die anymore.

[walkingstackofbooks]

For the ficlet prompt. What do you think their first lunch was like after the Dominion camp?

Julian is reeling from the ramifications of the changling that took his place, which everyone liked better. And maybe he's disappointed in Garak especially for not recognizing the imposter.

But also he learned the truth about Tain and watched Garak see his father die (and WHY did Garak do that??) and Julian probably wants to comfort his friend / situationship.

Garak meanwhile is reliving all the lunches that were actually the changling over the past few months. And his dad died and Julian SAW it (because he wanted Julian there). And he's worried about Julian who just got back from prison and probably has PTSD. And also why didn't he recognize the changling is he losing his edge as a spy?

And neither of them can say anything directly at lunch. So is it awkward? Are they both just so relieved to have the other there that it isn't awkward?

Do they talk about some book that acts as a perfect metaphor for what one (or maybe both) of them are going through??

Thanks to some assiduous Garak trickery over Halloween, I've finally got there! Thank you for your patience! (I know I never promised prompts would end up fulfilled, but still - half of this has been sitting in my drafts since July!)

I'm afraid this is not a happy fic, but I hope it answers a couple of your questions nonetheless! Thank you for the prompt - it was super interesting to think about!

--

The sound of the door chime startled him, and something dropped to the floor as he realised that his mind had drifted off again. It was now 12:38, which meant that he'd been out of it for some twenty-seven minutes - not the longest stretch by any means, but long enough. He looked down at the duster that had landed on his foot; apparently, he'd been cleaning? A glance around the quarters confirmed it: everything looked just that little bit neater, the books on the shelf were in a different order, and the sofa no longer bore the evidence that he had been sleeping on that instead of the bed.

Julian shivered. He had meant to tidy up, rearrange some things - but the purpose had been to make the quarters feel decidedly his again, and this... this didn't.

The door chimed again, and he hurried to shout 'Enter', knowing how easy it had been to concern his friends these past few days.

For some reason, it had not crossed his mind that it might be Garak to come through the door, armed with his usual pleasant smile. Maybe Julain had got too used to all the worried looks his other friends had been shooting him, but he wasn't sure whether to be relieved or apprehensive about the Cardassian's appearance. Everyone else had been understanding, at least, about the weird ways his trauma had been making itself known since he had got back – even if he had been embarrassed to have them see him like that, surely reinforcing how inferior the real Julian Bashir was to the pretend one. But Garak, well... who knew how he'd react?

"I see you weren't expecting me, Doctor," Garak said.

"Not exactly," responded Julian. "What are you doing here in—"

He hesitated, voice stuttering to a halt over the word "my quarters". It still didn't feel right. "What are you doing here?" he finished weakly instead.

"Well, I didn't want you to think I'd forgotten about our scheduled discussion," said Garak. "Although, of course, if you have other things to do…"

"No," broke in Julian, some part of him reaching out keenly for this time with Garak, no matter his anxieties. "No, I'm not doing anything. Please stay, Garak."

The Cardassian raised his eyebrows. "Stay, Doctor? But the replimat—"

Julian shook his head, looking away. "Unless it makes you uncomfortable..." he said, remembering too late that having conversation with Garak also meant eating lunch with Garak, and realising that he might trip over that very first hurdle. "I'm not, um— Food still isn't..."

He cringed at his own incoherence; he wasn't exactly making a convincing impression of a good lunch companion.

"I'm still adjusting to eating regular meals, and so the replicator here has been programmed to better accommodate my current needs."

And now he was sounding like a medical robot. Great job, Julian.

"I understand," said Garak. "Your recovery will be swift, I hope? But for now, there's little I would enjoy more than to accept your invitation. Where should I sit?"

"Oh, anywhere," replied Julian, gesturing at the sofas, grateful now for his unconscious burst of housekeeping. "Would you like something to drink?" he asked, just as much to put off answering Garak's first question as out of habitual politeness.

Garak replied that some rokassa juice would suit him well, thank you very much, and so Julian busied himself at the replicator, taking as much time as was believable over the task. He was rather out-of-practise at figuring out Elim Garak.

The trouble wasn't that Garak never meant what he said; most people didn't. But from most people, Julian would have assumed a question about his health was a simple pleasantry, and would have told them what they wanted to hear: yes, he was recovering well, and hoped to be totally back on his feet soon. With Garak, you had to listen out for what he didn't say, to know his meaning. 

Your recovery will be swift, I hope? It was barely even a question. And that meant Garak could be asking it simply because it was the normal thing to do (and maybe Julian really shouldn’t be obsessing so much over it). On the other hand, however, he could be showing great concern towards Julian, but because this was Garak, masking that he felt anything at all behind the banality. Or maybe he was even trying to indicate that he had just as little patience for sharing discussion without having lunch as he did for having lunch without any discussion, and he was only staying because he felt obliged to. Julian had noticed how Garak had said that there was “little” more he would enjoy, implying that there were other things he’d rather be doing...

Damn it all. Usually, Julian enjoyed running all the possibilities through his mind, relishing in the challenge of trying to give Garak the answer he wanted, but right now it already felt like there was too much in his brain, and Garak had barely even entered the room! Julian was certain that his mind had been quicker than this a month ago, that there hadn’t been this constant fog which he now had to wade through to get to the end of any thought, that his anxiety had been neither this loud, nor this overwhelming. 

The glass was in his hands, and he was handing it over to Garak; his feet had carried him back to the sofas without waiting for him to direct them. Julian sat down, mildly disturbed. The dissociation was nothing new, it had been following him since solitary – hence his earlier acceptance of the newly-clean room, rather than outright panic – but usually it had confined itself to times when he had been alone. He hoped this was just a blip, and not a development that was going to stay. 

“How have you been?” he asked. His fingers had started to tap against his leg, and he pulled his hands sharply together, clasping them tightly. Maybe he ought to have made himself a drink, too, just to give his hands something to hold.

“I am better, certainly, than the last time we talked,” Garak replied. “And you?”

Following Garak’s lead, Julian gave an equally non-committal reply. “I’ve been worse,” he shrugged.

“You’re still experiencing… difficulties, though?”

“Is it so obvious?” Julian chuckled, wincing and praying that it really was just the obvious that Garak had spotted.

“Well for one thing,” Garak started, “—and do forgive me for pointing this out, I feel a little rude… but I do not believe that this is Rokassa juice.”

“I—”

For a few seconds, Julian felt as though his brain had come to a complete halt. He sat there, staring at Garak stupidly, before leaning across the coffee table to reach out for Garak’s glass. Now he was thinking about it, he realised that Rokassa juice usually came in a mug.

And this, unmistakably, was tea. Tarkalean, not Cardassian.

“Heh, must have been on autopilot,” he said, trying to laugh it off. “I’m terribly sorry, Garak – let me get you another—”

“Allow me, my dear,” interrupted Garak, smoothly rising from the sofa and leaving Julian to wonder how on Earth he’d failed to notice the mix-up himself. He supposed that he really must be more behind on sleep than he’d thought.

The fact that Garak had seemed to return almost instantly added to that theory. Julian hadn’t even heard the beep of the replicator, and startled when Garak suddenly appeared by the sofas once more, mug in hand.

“Don’t worry, I’m just tired,” he said, in answer to Garak’s quizzical look. “I haven’t been sleeping much lately.”

He hadn’t meant for that to slip out, and hoped that his earlier supposition was true: that Garak was just being polite, and wasn’t really checking up on him. Julian didn’t need yet another friend inquiring about his nightmares.

He had no such luck, of course. Garak almost seemed to pounce on this opening.

“It is my understanding that humans recover best only when they are getting sufficient rest,” he said. “Indeed, I seem to remember several occasions upon which you, my dear, lamented your patients’ inability to follow the simple instruction of “Get some sleep”.”

Julian groaned, leaning back into the sofa, twisting the glass of rapidly-cooling tea in his hands. “It’s not that simple.”

“Do you expect it to be?”

The question brought Julian up short, grating in its sharp lack of sympathy.

“I—Not really, I suppose? Not after what we went through.”

The ‘we’ slipped out without thought, an unwitting lie despite its truth. But it was easier, somehow, to claim the shared ghastliness of the final few days. ‘I’ sounded dreadfully lonely.

An unfamiliar expression stole across Garak’s face, and Julian wished he could tell what the Cardassian was thinking. Whatever it was, it seemed that Garak had lost control of the conversation too, the both of them reaching out for something to say, and returning with nothing – nothing they could admit to, anyway.

“Did you read any books while I was away?” he asked, before he had to contend with any awkward silence.

“None that were worth discussing,” Garak replied dismissively, leaving Julian wracking his brains for what he’d recommended that was so objectionable – before the unpleasant realisation swept over him that anything Garak had read, he would have discussed with the changeling. His stomach curdled, and he took a quick mouthful of his tea to try and swallow down the bile rising in the back of his throat.

“Can I—Do you—?" He was just saying words now, hoping that he’d stumble upon a suitable question and coming up laughably blank.

His stomach came to the rescue, interrupting his stilted thoughts with a growl. A rather loud growl, in fact, which had him wondering if he’d actually eaten breakfast that morning.

“I should eat,” he said, standing up and trying for a smile. “Thank you, Garak – this has been… nice—”

A frown drifted across Garak's face. “Are you we not sharing lunch, Doctor?”, he asked, his eyes flicking to the clock. Julian followed his gaze, and was startled to realise less than ten minutes had passed since Garak had entered. Oh.

But eating was difficult enough without the shadow of the changeling’s lunches looming fresh in Julian’s mind.  “I can’t,” he replied. “I’m sorry, Garak, it’s just, I can’t—.” He broke off.

I can’t eat with you.

Why would Garak even want to stay for longer anyway? Surely he could see that there was no scintillating conversation to be found in these quarters today?

Unless Julian had been so wrapped up in his own thoughts that he hadn’t even realised what Garak had really come looking for.

“Garak…” he started hesitantly. “About Tain—”

“I’ll leave you to your lunch, Doctor,” Garak interrupted, speaking over Julian as though he hadn’t said a word. “I hope you have a pleasant meal.”

The Cardassian stood up, first putting his mug away in the replicator, and then crossing the room to the door. For once, Julian could see straight through him, the way that Garak was trying to disguise the fact that he was all but bolting from the room.

“At least I know I’m not okay!” he found himself shouting over the sound of the door’s opening swish.

Garak turned to look at him. “Is that a fact?” he asked – and then he was gone.

Julian sat down, aching in a way he could not name. His stomach hurt, and the quarters were not his, and he was once more alone.

[jarenka]

The Anakin timetravel WIP for the title tagging game? :D I'd love to know how that timetraveling works, whether he (?) goes to the past or the future, and what fun facts you want to share ~ All the best!

So, this is supposed to be continuation of this fic (it's even in English)

TL;DR: Right after his death in ROTJ Anakin time-traveled in the past during the Clone Wars. Right in this moment he was speaking with Palpatine in his cabinet, so when Anakin started to gain conscious he hears Palpatine's voice and like: THIS BITCH AGAIN?! And immediately kills him.

Then Anakin was arrested. He was tried and found innocent by jury.

Happy end?

Not completely. Anakin is still mentally unwell, he was unable to restore his relationship with Padme and fucked up his relationship with the Force. So he stays in a Temple and buries himself in work like fixing ships and teaching younger Jedi maths and engineering.

So, the fic itself is supposed to be bittersweet and introspective. Obi-Wan gets Anakin on vacation, to chill and touch some grass, they have some light adventure on a way, but mostly talk and the beginning of the romance (it is supposed to be old good pre-slash). Honestly, this fic has only couple of snippets and don't have a fully-formed plan.

One of the snippets:

He couldn't remember the last time he'd been on vacation. Darth Vader did not have vacations, he fled to his residence on Mustafar to heal and think about how he hates everyone in the world, especially himself. Anakin Skywalker vacationed with Padme on Naboo several times. When he was able to take a few days off between missions, they went to the Naberry country house, cooked together, lay in bed for half a day, swam in the lake, and had picnics on the shore. Everything was organised by Padme, and Anakin didn’t need to worry about their schedule or what to get with them on a picnic. 

Anakin packed a bag with spare underwear, a clean shirt, a communicator, and a datapad. He was going to make at least the first sketches for the engineering course for senior padawans. 

"Don’t even try to take your work on vacation," came a message from Obi-Wan. 

"How do you know that?!"

"Because I know you very well, Anakin." 

Anakin couldn't help but smile, which immediately disappeared when he thought of another person who also knew him very well. Good enough to play on all his weaknesses, and then not let Anakin go of his grip for years. 

"Okay, I won't take my work on vacation." 

He didn't want to think about Palpatine. The old bastard is dead. In this universe, his plans will never come true. 

Sometimes, in the darkest moments, Anakin still felt that it would be better for him to die alongside Palpatine. 

And after it he would go to class with his students, or for a walk, or to the hangar, or to the theater with Master Windu and Isla Secura. Like a normal person.

[beenbaanbuun]

Hey bunny! Sorry for bothering you when I'm sure you're in the middle of perfecting the addams!matz fic, but I have a kinda specific request I'm not sure I'd trust anyone else with.

I've been feeling kinda low on the self esteem/body image scales, but whenever I look for comfort fics I find that a lot of them cater towards chubby or curvier readers, which is great! I'm really happy that authors are doing that... but as someone who has the figure of a crayon, and is insecure about not being curvy or "feminine" enough, or worse that I appear child-like, it kinda just serves as a reminder some days T-T

So would it be too self indulgent to request a comfort/body worship fic with either Mingi or Yeosang with an s/o who's not curvy and is insecure about it?

No hard feelings if that's outta your comfort zone tho! I geddit ^^

Have a good day bunny, hope you have nothing but happy, snuggly, cozy vibes <33

~Lyra

i get where you’re coming from completely!! i feel like as a curvier girl i’m very lucky because it’s fairly easy to find fics catered towards me. i guess due to my own ignorance i haven’t really taken notice of a lack of fics that don’t cater to me but now you point it out i can see that it’s definitely true! i hope that i can write this perfectly for you because i feel like everyone should have fics that include them!

so i’m under the impression that mingi does not give a fuck about body type in the slightest

i mean we’ve all seen his fan calls - the man flirts with anyone regardless of body type and he’s so real for that!

but despite your boyfriend’s love and affection, sometimes your own brain gets to you a little

and sometimes the time you spend picking yourself to pieces in the mirror increases to a level that’s become concerning to mingi

he’ll catch you from time to time, just standing there and running your hands over your form

and, sure, he may be a little oblivious sometimes, but he isn’t dumb; he knows that it can’t be anything good

it’s not really a surprise when the two of you are getting ready for a date night and he catches you doing the exact same thing

he doesn’t say anything as he crawls on the bed, choosing to relax as he waits for you to finish, but that doesn’t mean he isn’t worried

still, even with him wondering whether or not you’re okay, he can’t help but admire how pretty you look in that dress

the way it elegantly hugs your body, stopping at mid-thigh to reveal just enough of your pretty legs to draw him in, but not enough to send him feral

well, even more feral than usual that is; you could be dressed in a pair of ratty old pyjamas and that man would still find something to make his dick twitch

“mingi,” you say after a short while of him admiring you, “do you think i look alright?”

his brow furrows and he scoffs in dismay

he’s almost offended in a way because how dare someone say something like that about his girl?

then he remembers that you are his girl and the fact that you’re saying it should probably be more cause for concern than offense

“you look better than alright, princess,” he says, “you think i’d be sat here undressing you with my eyes if i didn’t?”

you send him a glare through the mirror

“that’s not the point, mingi,” you grumble, “i know you think i’m hot but…”

“but what?” he asks, voice thick with worry, “you’re not worried about what other people think of you, right?”

you begin to shake your head, although you feel like your denial isn’t necessarily true

so instead you shrug, and with a sigh you tear yourself away from the mirror so you can go and sit on the edge of the bed next to mingi

he budges his legs over, making space for you to perch yourself on the mattress

“i mean i guess so?” you say, “i just… i don’t want people thinking i look like a child or something, y’know?”

mingi doesn’t know - the last thing he thinks of you is ‘child’, but that doesn’t necessarily mean he can’t try and sympathise

he shifts one of his hands from behind his head to rub against your arm soothingly

“i don’t think you look like a child,” he says, “i think you look like my girlfriend; my very pretty, very sexy girlfriend, very mature-looking girlfriend.”

and while you appreciate his words, you can’t help but feel like they don’t mean much coming from him

it makes you feel bad, of course, but your boyfriend telling you you’re hot just doesn’t fill you with confidence about what everyone else thinks

“you don’t count,” you pout, “you have to think i’m hot.”

you don’t see the way mingi rolls his eyes before shoving himself into a sitting position

he shuffles his way over until he’s right behind you, close enough to swaddle your upper half in his overly-lengthy arms

he squeezes tight, just how he knows you like it

“i don’t have to think anything,” he kisses the spot just below your ear, “i think you’re hot because i have eyes and i can see that you’re hot.”

you can’t help but giggle as he nuzzled his nose into your neck, puffing out blasts of warm air against the sensitive skin

he always could find a way of making you laugh, even if in this situation, you’d personally class it as cheating

“well,” you say through your giggles, “i also have eyes and my eyes say the opposite!”

“yeah, but i don’t trust your eyes,” he kisses you, wet and sloppy and soft, against where your shoulder meets your neck, “they’re connected to your brain and me and your brain aren’t the best of friends.”

his hand move until they’re flat against your ribs, thumbs smoothing over the fabric of your dress

he almost wished the dress wasn’t there at all, wanting to feel the skin to skin contact, but he hardly thought now was the best time to ask you to strip

“you love my brain,” you counter, “my brain is me and you always tell me you love me!”

he smiles; you feel his teeth brush against you

“true,” he says, “but your brain is also mean to you, and anyone who’s mean to my baby is my enemy, okay?”

it’s a silly argument, but you can’t help but nod along in agreement

“good,” he says as he feels you give into his compliments, “now we have two choices; we either go out on the date, or we lie here and cuddle. it’s up to you, princess.”

you know which one he’d prefer; the way he’s stuck himself to you back like a limpet is enough evidence of that

but you can’t quite decide for yourself

one one hand you’re already dressed and made up, plus the fact that you’ve been wanting to go to this place for ages now and tables are really hard to book

on the other, taking the uncomfortable shoes off and crawling into bed next to your overly-clingy boyfriend seemed just so tempting

perhaps the choice isn’t that hard after all, you realise as you lean over - boyfriend still very much attached to you - to grab your makeup wipes

“pick a film, then,” you instruct as you take one out of the packet and begin to rub at your face, “and make it a good one!”

[outsidereveries]

Hi babe, could u do a personality reading abt jude bellingham? I love ur content

jude bellingham's personality

what he was like in his childhood: personally, i am unaware of how wealthy his family was during that time, but he was aware of the hard times his parents had during his childhood.. therefore, jude's family might've had more hardships than most people, and jude was aware of them. he might've wanted more toys or things, related to his hobbies during jude's childhood and it feels like (to me) he received them at later time, when his parents could afford them. despite these times his family was in, jude was very happy, very optimistic child who wants to achieve his dreams. jude wanted for his family to live well and not.. in these hard situations they were in. because jude started playing football since he was 6/7, he just worked really hard to make his parents proud.

off-topic, edit: since i got aware that his parents have had always money (jude went to private school), then his parents might've had not enough savings.

which qualities has changed during puberty: he started to adapt with the football industry, therefore he got a lot more courageous than before (confident too). he also started to balance in one way or another his personal life with his public one (i've seen some videos when fans of him were near him in a way k-pop fans would be and i got a bit worried tbh but if he's fine with this, then he just adapted with it).

what he's faking: i'd say nothing, however he repress his emotions in front of the public eyes. he admires highly the attention he receives because of his work and is very thankful, however he is just so thankful that he watches the other people in his industry and how is like a job to them, so jude just tries to not show it that much because everyone else isn't showing it as much as jude personally wants to. he also would like to be transparent to the public eye (to be honest and himself) but again because of his industry repress these thoughts and intentions.

what's also fake but tries not to be: his love life, i believe so. he tries to find his special person, but it just.. won't work. he just loves football (soccer) very much and is just too busy to do what he loves. jude might waits for his soulmate/twin flame at this point, so he just does what he loves to do. i doubt these cards are for his family, especially his brother. from what i felt, jude's energy is really pure and geniune, so i just really doubt there's anything fake about his family as he is very thankful to them and loves very dearly.

what's genuine: his charisma, his aura/energy, his love for the soccer/football.

what we don't see: jude actually knows his worth. possibly related to his family and what they went through around his childhood, he tries to negotiate anything as much as he can/could. jude tries to get more than his personal expectations, such as goals, money and etc. as much as he dreams about his future, he acts through it and thinks realistically. he might hide what he wants to do or will do, but this is better for jude himself because that works for him.

political views: jude is personally dissapointed in uk's current government (this doesn't have to do with the royal family at all as i saw their current prime minister) because there was a private conversation that happened in the past. whether if it happened recently (months ago or even weeks/days) or a year-two, there was political offer to jude. not for him to join the politics but for him to support something he doesn't actually supports, so he refused. bellingham seemed to not trust uk's current government because he saw the truth about them. he feels proud to refuse their offer (it seems to have a big amount of money if he accepted it), so he would be the happiest if he sees them receiving their karma. jude would want new elections to uk as soon as possible.

what's mixing between his morals and the fame: the dynamic life the celebrity life is offering. jude is more simplistic, he feels that his home is surrounding his family and not the fame itself. jude dislikes the long distance and really tries to be with them as much as possible.

would he choose the fame over his standarts: obviously, no. his family is before everything.

religious/spiritual views: might be an atheist or believes in specific religion but not to this extent the religious people believe. from spiritual perspective, he seems less woke as he puts his effort first before everything else (at least, from achieving his desires's pov).

controversial things he agrees with: that everyone shouldn't go after the fame and/or money at all costs. he believes that everyone should think through their future a bit and plan before acting.

addictions (either more prone to has them or might have them): bellingham seems to be an over-achiever, whether if it's about himself or not. i can see bellingham taking similar route to berbatov, where dimitar has a foundation to gifted kids. i see something similar for jude. you might be wondering where is the addiction here, and i'll answer. jude might be very, very stubborn about how he personally works. with the time, if he starts of course, he might try to do everything alone (with his family at its maximum, maybe?). basically, overworking/overachieving.

destruction traits: risking everything for an idea he wants to do.. possibly his impulsivity/stubborness.

qualities he's proud to have: how hardworking he is.. and how he balances his job with his personal life too.

intentions for the future: doing the same as usual. he will work even harder to be at its best form!

[desired-fantasy-writings]

Lucio Relationship Headcanons

A/N: Writing for my boi cause I'm desperately trying to stay out of writer's block. My inspiration is down in the dumps rn ;-; I hate having attention issues I just wanna write and be consistent instead of blankly staring at my computer screen…. UGH. Anyways I don't see enough writing for Lucio so here's my take on him. 

Requested by: Nobody Warnings: None Readers Gender: Gender Neutral Fanfic Type: Headcanon Fanfic Genre: Fluff Word Count: 518

Lùcio is the definition of being the best hype man in any type of relationship! Whether it's romantic or platonic, he's always got anyone's back he deems a good person to be around. 

From his lore his childhood was a tough one, but he made the best of it that he could as he didn't let it bring him down - instead it brought him back up to inspire others to do the same. Super empathetic towards others and is more emotionally mature then most of the overwatch fellas.

Lùcio's ideal partner I feel would be someone just as courageous and an activist as he is, and a big lover of music. Who is empathetic towards others and someone that never gives up no matter the situation.

Of course not everyone's like that, and if he ended up finding an S/O who's not so confident in their abilities, Lùcio’s got them. Their last stand before ever falling. He refuses to ever let his partner get to that point.

Very much a social butterfly and loves meeting new people. If his S/O struggles with any of that - don't worry, Lùcio's very good at introducing people to each other. 

Gets inspired seeing other people also be inspired by their passions. It makes Lùcio really happy and giddy but he keeps most of it inside so as to not look like he's over exaggerating or faking it.

I feel for Lùcio, he's not picky about what he and his S/O does for dates. He’s not a fan of going out for expensive dates though, feels like it's too much of a cliche for his liking, and no, it's not because he's cheap. He'd rather chill at home with his S/O, sharing one ear bud each and listen to music while enjoying each other's company. 

Lùcio is full of energy, so I'd feel he'd also like dates that involve some sort of outdoor activity. Is not a fan of being cooped up inside ALL the time he'd go stir crazy otherwise. He needs a fine balance of going outside and chilling indoors.

I feel Lùcio would be the playful teasing type of partner who knows when to step back when it's overwhelming for his S/O. Is very much a physical affectionate type of guy who also appreciates quality time.

Likes to do little dances with his S/O. <3

As much as Lùcio is independent and isn't very needy, he feels off when his S/O isn't around. It throws off his vibe somewhat and the overwatch crew obviously take notice of it. 

Big obvious, Lùcio being a musician and all, he makes music about his S/O. A lot of the songs he makes for them can be… quiet private so he only shows them to his S/O, while some he eagerly wants to share to his fans cause he loves his S/O so much. Wants to show everyone how happy they make him and he could give less of a fuck about the haters he will defend his S/O with all his might. 

[burins]

@mengyao and @bao3bei4 did a 20 questions meme and y'all know I love a meme.

1. How many works on AO3?

72! a wild number. I thought about stopping at 69 but the lure of posting is too great.

2. Total word count on AO3?

334,157. which frankly also feels surreal. at some point I have to recognize that I've been in fandom for almost 15 years and thus have amassed a pretty substantial word count despite almost never writing longfic!

3. Top five fics by kudos?

unfurl

mission parameters

everybody says

flash in the pan 

field research 

shocking no one, these are all DC fics, but they're not all the ones I would assume would be the most popular (field research is straight up sex club idfic porn!) I try very hard not to write with a capital-A audience in the back of my head aside from like, a handful of friends I know will yell at me about certain lines because a) that's a surefire way for writing to not be fun anymore and b) you simply can't know what is gonna get recced on some massive server you've never heard of and what is going to be the sleeper fave of like five really dedicated commenters.

this wasn't asked but it feels important: as of right now 666 people are subscribed to me. great number everyone can pack up and go home!

4. What fandoms do you primarily write for?

DC at this point, aside from my yearly excursion back into Friends at the Table for the Secret Samol exchange. I have to be careful enough with how and when I write that I don't know when I'll be able to answer the call of a new fandom. I'd like to write more HxH stuff, though! 

5. Do you respond to comments?

if it's a substantial comment I really try to! comments bring me a tremendous amount of joy and I love to talk about my own writing (clearly.) I usually do in batches so it takes quite a while.

6. Angstiest ending?

one time I wrote a fic where one half of the pairing asked her wife to murder her, and her wife did <3 

7. Fic with the happiest ending?

god. I feel like I so rarely write a completely uncomplicated happy ending, because all the characters I like to write are kind of miserable people. actually if we're not counting fluff or porn, which don't so much have a happy ending as start there and stay there, the answer to this one in terms of biggest distance from beginning to end is breath hot blood red. this is the fic where Bruce makes a deal with a Creature and reaps the consequences. you might think a fic with these particular tags could not possibly have a happy ending but it does! I think Bruce setting aside the cowl is actually the happiest ending he is ever going to get. I really waffled on whether to give him one tbh. in an alternate universe Dick dies on that rooftop and Batman eats Bruce alive :)

8. Do you get hate?

not particularly! I was worried when I started posting jaydick but tbh I've gotten weirder comments about how I characterize superbat lol. sorry I do not believe that two men with this many neuroses are always nice to each other. I'm including Clark in that too if you think that man escaped growing up an alien in small town Kansas with no psychological damage in how he treats himself and others I don't know what to tell you. yes he's superman yes self sacrifice and caring are at the very core of his being and yes that causes problems! it is difficult to be in love with someone who will always put the world's needs above your own even if you know they're right to do so; it's also difficult, in a very mundane way, to be in love with someone who would rather chew their own arm off than ask for something.

9. Do you write smut?

do I ever! I love writing porn. I think it's a great way to get at the root of how characters relate to each other and a fun writing exercise for me, who at this point has written a lot of porn, to figure out how to make this one feel fresh and new and also still be hot. sometimes when this happens you wind up writing chair kink. I can talk about character relationships all day long but at the end of the day it has to be hot!

10. Do you write crossovers?

aside from my one mdzs locked tomb au, which is more of a sci fi fusion that riffs off of one specific premise in that series, no! it's not usually something I'm super interested in - the reason I write fic for any canon is the juice in the existing character relationships, so I don't generally feel the need to pull in anyone else. 

11. Ever had a fic stolen?

not to my knowledge! I mean I'm sure they've all been scraped but. :(

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

yes! itsuki_minatsu did a Mandarin translation of take a pic, strike a pose and I only wish I could read it because I bet the translations of the group chat are really funny. 

13. Have you ever co-written a fic?

also yes! not in years though. I cowrote an ungodly amount of porn about ttrpg OCS in the process of getting together with my spouse (and also meeting many beloved friends.) I do often get inspiration from riffing off of things with friends on social media or in group chats, which has some of the same juice to me!

14. All time favorite ship?

truly not a question I can answer. I go back and read for a lot of old fandoms!

15. WiPs you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

this is a bit of a depressing question at this juncture so I am skipping it ✌️

16. Writing strengths?

due to my years in the Twitter mines making my friends sad via 140 characters or less I can create atmosphere quite quickly! I'm proud of my prose in general, and I put a lot of thought into creating meaty characters that bounce off each other in satisfying ways.

17. Writing weaknesses?

plot. oh my god. you want me to keep track of these people's emotions AND make up things to happen? there's a reason I've written a grand total of five fics that broke 10k and it's not just because I have chronic pain in my arms.

18. Thoughts on mixed language dialogue?

I know enough about how being multilingual works to know I won't be attempting it. The exception is I don't tend to translate titles or words that normally wouldn't be translated in an English sentence. I'm not out here making Lan Wangji play the zither.

I did have to go kind of the opposite direction in from the inside of the wound when Clark and Kara are speaking in Kryptonian, though, because a) I wanted their conversation to be entirely in Kryptonian but English for the reader because b) I can't be going into the conlang mines. I have utmost respect for folks like blorb-el who are out here doing the work! but once I cross that Rubicon I never come back and I need to save my language learning juice for languages that will help me out at work. I think I managed it with a minimum of awkwardness!

19. First fandom you wrote for?

warrior cats baybee! I was a proboards forum kid.

20. Favorite fic you’ve ever written?

impossible question, I answer it differently every time. I think how cleanly how quietly might be one of my faves because Tim has historically been difficult for me to write and I wanted to make Bruce an unreliable narrator who's clearly in the wrong here while still making him not totally unsympathetic. (the comments section to that one kind of bears up my suspicion that your reaction to that fic is a litmus test for how you feel about your dad.) also I got to throw in a ton of Easter eggs which was simply so fun for me, a person who adores coming up with silly little details. 

also tbh I think every year I do a secret Samol it comes out better than the last. some of my absolute best writing has been read by several dozen very dedicated people who are still into hieron six years after it ended. and for that I say thank you!!! friends at the table is your favorite writer's favorite writing. they're starting a new season now you can get in on the ground floor- 

tagging: if you want to do this, you should tag me in it. for real, I mean that, I want to hear how you think about writing! even if we aren't mutuals!!!!

[nyaagolor]

Howdy again, if it's the meta world VS "real world" thing in Umineko that's got you stumbling, don't worry. The assumption Ryukishi and co. seem to be going with is that the meta world IS real, and everyone's just chilling in a happy magic afterlife post-series (hence how episodes 7, 8, and 9 can even happen). The "07th Expansion All Characters Settings Collection" guidebook even has little epilogue blurbs for the cast, I can link you the translation hosted on the wiki if you want. It's still bleak in the sense that, yknow, everyone was dead from the start and the whole journey was more of a "coming to terms with what happened" kind of deal, but I think it works given stuff like the Divine Comedy references going on (if you read Battler as Dante and Beatrice as uh, Beatrice, a lot of Umineko'll start to make sense). The way I see the split is kind of an "as above, so below" type deal - while Tohya is down in the land of the living trying to write and solve things, Battler and friends really are up there fighting for their lives in purgatory, and the two reflect each other. Of course if that's not the problem you have, I'd love to hear what you're thinking!

hiii thank u for the ask!! (sorry this will be a Long One). I'll admit the meta world / real world stuff tripped me up at first, because looking at episodes 4 and 8 it really seemed to be implying that the metanarrative was the coping mechanism of Ange+Tohya and their way of pretending like their loved ones got the happy endings they didn't get in life rather than something we can actually assume happened. However extra content implies this is not the case, Ryukishi doesn't feel like the author who would do that especially after the thesis of Higurashi, and tbh even if he did there was enough plausible deniability that I would just imagine the Golden Land as real because You Gotta Cope Somehow. I love the "as above so below" vibes too, that's a fun new aspect to incorporate

My biggest hangup with the ending was basically in the idea that Sayo's narrative is fundamentally doomed. I was under the impression that the boat scene was implying that Sayo couldn't be happy even if she did escape due to the burden of the truth / her trauma. The positive framing of the catbox remaining at the bottom of the ocean initially struck me as a "her death is the happiest ending you can hope for because of how fucked up this all is" which is already a nihilistic narrative but downright unbearable when given to an intersex trans woman. I just don't vibe with hopeless trans narratives at all, and felt like I had misinterpreted smth bc Ryukishi isn't really a nihilistic guy. I'll admit I got a little soured to the narrative as a whole when I looked around online and saw people talking about how Sayo getting a happy ending was "missing the point".

After talking to @heartgold I realized that I had reversed the causality a bit. I was under the impression while playing that Ryukishi's insistence that "things had to happen this way" was him not just saying "oh everyone is already dead, the end result is already the same bc we're looking back at past events" but also "it doesn't matter what individual actions people took, it was always going to end in tragedy". I realize now it's more of a "this was totally preventable in so many ways but it already happened and now we have to grieve and cope in whatever way we can manage" kinda thing rather than a "this is fate and Sayo was screwed regardless", so I'm cool with that aspect. (Also I won't lie I prefer to imagine the boat scene as almost entirely metaphorical and more of a representation of the fragmentation of Battler's consciousness due to trauma in a similar way as what happened to Sayo, but that's neither here nor there)

The other part of it, and the thing I'm still really hung up on, is the question of whether or not the Golden Land is actually a happy ending and, if it is real, whether we're supposed to view it as a sorta perverse tragedy. On one hand, the alters are all implied to be separate people and they get their happy endings (yay), but on the other hand that doesn't really fix nor address Sayo feeling like she needs romantic love to be fulfilled (also The Incest(?) I'm genuinely unsure if the whole "alters becoming separate entities" negates the incest or not). The idea that Sayo was so far gone that even the fantasy created from her best memories does not allow her to truly be happy is just so insanely depressing to me, so I find myself stuck with that friction of wanting Sayo to have her prince and her white horse and her fantasy happy ending while also not wanting to downplay the truth. Having this little moral dilemma feels like the point of Episode 8 and really gets us into Tohya's head, which is awesome, but also gives me a lot of mixed feelings. Knowing that Sayo's truth literally has Beatrice married to Battler makes it even tougher bc I can't just use plausible deniability and say they're platonic bc they are uh. very much not as far as Ryukishi is concerned. I'm still working out my feelings on it, mostly because I desperately want Sayo to have everything she's ever wanted but also having to contend with the little part of me that's whispering "it can't and shouldn't happen and you know it". Alas. Umineko.

PS: thank you for telling me about the character booklet, that's SO cute!!! I love the little details about everyone and the cat-ear Bern is everything I've ever wanted

[lustlovehart]

I usually struggle with writing/commenting on anything, but I gotta. The monster!AU, that Malleus piece? Fucking gold. I absolutely loved it. I don't know how often I reread it. Likely seriously. It's so good. I love your writing style, I love how you portrait Malleus as absolutely infatuated but still as a (powerful) monster who, well, does monster things. En mass, since he's so powerful.

I'd love to see more of the Monster!AU (especially Diasomnia, I'm a sucker for them), but I also just wanna say I'm gonna read whatever you post anyway.

Love your work, I hope you're doing well and have a fun spooky month ahead of you!

People really reread my stuff that much?!?! IM HONORED.

Honestly, I really thought the Malleus piece would only get like, 100 notes as it was on the older side. I did go back and add more to it though, so that might be why it got more traction than expected 😭.

My writing style for Monster!Twst is basically just a constant, “How do I make it sound romantic enough for everyone to understand their interest“ and “how do I make them crazy murderers?“

Malleus and Readers dance was probably one of my favorite ways to show it! (There was also something simialr to it in the Incubus!Vil piece, but its a bit more subtle compared to Malleus. This next paragraph is just gonna be me blabbing about Hard Stoned Gallery Dance guys!)

I tried to show MH!Darling’s lack of awaraness of the danger he imposes in the dance! Throughout the whole thing they’re sloppy, essentially relaxed as each step they take is messy, but still lands where they’re meant to. Menwhile, in the complete opposite of the spectrum is Malleus, who is quite literally serandaing you with praise and kisses, while performing the dance with perfection.

It shows how oblivous reader can be about the danger they let run rampant into the world, and said danger lovingly holding them in his arms.

Until you smell the foul stentch, and the disposition changes immediately. You become rigid with worry, while Malleus’s gentle grip becomes harsh, movments becoming swift amd sharp with no time to reciporocate.

I’m sorry about that ramble, but i wanted to gush about the one part I liked about the fic (≧◡≦) ♡

Don’t worry! Ive stated before there will be a lot more Monster!Twst to come, especially with it being halloween season (￣▽￣) (I have like 3 requests for the Au, The Heartslaybul chapter, and one extra post with a potential thought of Fellow and Skully!)

Speaking of Diasmonia, all the dorms play a heavy part in the story, but! They’re actually a bit more of special case! similar to the actually storyline in twst, I wanted to make it so Diasmonia was basically a mystery factor within the plot, so, they may or may not be some parts where they’re mentioned, or possibly, even there...!

Whether you read only Monster!Twst or my other stuff, i’m happy you spend time out of your day enjoying my writing! Thank you for your kinds words, and I hope you have a very sppoky october too!!!! ( ´ ▽ ` ).｡ｏ♡

[opalimagines]

The Talk

You and Rick tell your father that you're dating, and he decides it's time to have The Talk

Rick Tyler/gn!reader and Dad!Richard Swift x gn!reader (BUT I wanted to make the grandpa joke so there's the implication that reader has a uterus. You can easily skip that line though)

Warnings: There is discussion of sex here in the context of a father talking to two teens about being safe but no one is actually having sex

"Are you sure this is a good idea?"

"Yeah, of course." You stopped your fist before your knuckles could rap on the door and looked over at Rick, who had his hands shoved into the pockets of his jacket. "You're not?"

"I just don't want to be sent to purgatory."

Smiling, you rolled your eyes. "Come on, he wouldn't do that. He likes you."

"He might not like me anymore when he finds out we're dating," Rick pointed out matter of factly.

"It won't be like that." You reached out and gave his arm a little squeeze. "We came all this way. We have to tell him eventually, so we might as well just get it over with."

Sand had invited you to come stay in New York and spend Thanksgiving week with your father, and he was happy to extend the invitation to Rick when you asked. The two of you arrived that morning and spent the day with Sand, Jennie, Todd, and Grant, as well as your father, and while it was fun, there was another reason for bringing Rick along. So, after dinner, you made your way to The Shade's quarters to deliver the news of your relationship.

Before Rick could agree with you, the door swung open to reveal your father sitting at his desk, which was as neatly organized as the rest of the room. He didn't look up from his journal as his fountain pen scratched the paper.

"Are you two going to come in, or did you plan on standing out there all evening?"

You held your hand out to Rick, and he took it without hesitation, lacing your fingers. Stepping into the room together, you went straight to the point. "Rick and I wanted to let you know that we're dating."

Shade had an amused look on his face as he finally turned his attention from his writing. "Oh my, is that what the bickering was about? I already suspected as much."

"What do you mean?!"

"You two haven't exactly been subtle today."

Rick looked at you and you at him, and you both realized what he was talking about. Casual affection was already pretty normal at that point since the two of you had been falling into it before even going on a date, so neither of you thought much of being close to one another. Everyone else in the house already caught onto it, but you thought since he hadn't spent as much of the day with you, he probably hadn't noticed. Well, you were wrong.

"So, you're not mad?" Rick had been prepared to hear how he wasn't good enough for you at best and for a trip to the Shadowlands at worst. Not this.

"Mad, dear boy? No, I'm quite happy for you both. I noticed your fondness for each other months ago. Why do you think I invited you into our home?"

Whether it was in Opal or Blue Valley, he was quite protective of his space and his peace. You didn't really consider the significance of having Rick over until then, thinking it was because of their work to resurrect Grundy. You chuckled softly and explained. "He rarely lets other people in our home. Jack's the only other person he's invited over since I started living with him. Who even knows how long it'd been before that?"

"Decades," Shade answered as he got to his feet and came to stand in front of the two of you, clapping a hand on Rick's shoulder. "You have nothing to worry about, Rick."

He was still a little on edge because it seemed to be going too well. "You're not even going to give me the 'hurt them, and I'll kill you' speech?"

Shade smiled. "I always thought I'd have to someday, but luckily, they brought home someone who doesn't need it."

Rick relaxed considerably at those words, that last bit of nerves completely disappearing. Hearing that from your father, knowing that he didn't think his kid was dating trash, really meant something. When he looked at you, you were beaming, and you brushed your thumb over his.

"See? I told you it would be okay."

As it turned out, that particular discussion was only the beginning.

A short time later, the two of you were in your room, Rick having snuck over from his own after you both got ready for bed. You were snuggled into his side, nice and warm under the blanket, until you heard a knock on the door and your father's voice saying your name.

You shot up and threw the blanket off. And Rick? Well, he just knew he needed to be anywhere else at the moment besides in your bed.

"Get in the closet!" you whisper yelled, pulling him over by his hand and giving him a peck on the lips before practically shoving him inside. "Sorry!"

Rick couldn't exactly argue with your urgency because finding you and him in bed together, as innocent as it was, probably wouldn't go over well with your father. Still, he never thought he'd be the boyfriend hiding in the closet.

Pulling the door open, you tried your best to look and sound casual. "Everything alright, Papa?"

"Oh, yes," he answered with a smirk. "I wanted to speak with you."

Seeing your chance, you stepped out and began to close the door behind you. "Okay, let's go for a walk."

"No, no. Let's talk inside."

"Sure." You had a feeling that he knew what was going on, but you still played along for the moment and flipped on the light before letting him in. Shade shut the door and sat in the chair in the corner, and you took the bed. "So, what's up?"

He looked over at the closet, and you knew your suspicion was correct. "Come out now, Rick. You need to hear this, too."

Slowly, Rick opened the door and peeked out. You were clearly nervous, which was understandable considering the situation, but Shade didn't look even a little bit as enraged as he assumed he'd be.

Rick stepped out, and Shade gestured toward the spot next to you on the edge of the bed. "Please, sit."

He took the seat, and you placed your hand over his in support. "We were just going to sleep. We weren't doing anything–" you started, but your father stopped you.

"You don't need to explain." Shade sat forward in the chair, letting out a sigh. He'd tried to prepare for this moment before he came by, but it clearly didn't do him much good. "Oh, damnation. I thought I had a few more years before I had to do this."

You were still waiting for him to get to the point because, as quick as you were, you hadn't caught on yet. On the other hand, Rick's eyes were as wide as dinner plates. Once Shade produced a box of condoms from his coat, you also realized precisely what was happening. "Oh, no. Papa, we've only been dating for three weeks! We're not doing that."

"I was a young man once, too. I know how quickly things can happen." Shade reached out and placed the box on your bedside table, knowing that you'd only be more embarrassed to take it from his hand. "I'm not here to judge you on what you may or may not be doing together. I simply wanted to remind you to please be safe. If you ever decide to do more than sleep, please use one of those. After all, I'm far too young to be a grandfather."

"Oh my god!"

Shade stood from the chair as Rick still sat frozen, and you had your head in your hands. "If either of you need to talk about these things, you can always come to me."

"Yes, Papa." You zipped over to the door, holding it open for him to get out as quickly as possible. "We appreciate that. Thank you. Goodnight."

Once he exited and you shut the door behind him, everything came out at once. "I'm so sorry I didn't think he'd do that I mean not with you here it was humiliating I get it if you want to go back home that was too m—are you...laughing?"

Rick bit his lip to try and hold it in as you sat down next to him again. "Sorry. I just can't believe I got the facts of life talk from The Shade of all people."

You couldn't help laughing, too. "Yeah, I see your point. Still, I'm sorry. We've only been dating for three weeks, and it's not like I haven't thought about it, but–" Your eyes went wide, and you threw yourself into bed. "Okay, goodnight!"

Rick smiled as you yanked the blanket over your head to hide, and he gently pulled it back down. "If it makes you feel better, I've thought about it, too. More than once."

Your grip on the blanket loosened. "Really?"

"Yeah. But I'm not ready for that yet."

"Neither am I."

"Then we don't need to worry about those," he said, nodding towards the condoms, "until we're both ready. Whenever that is."

You smiled up at him. "That sounds good to me."

"Still want me to stay?" After everything, he could see you preferring he stay in his own room.

"Please."

Rick turned the light off and climbed back into bed with you, holding you in his arms like he was before your father appeared.

Even without your father's approval, you would've kept seeing Rick, but it was still nice to know you had it.

[charcubed]

Look, I personally lose nothing if Lokius doesn’t become explicit canon. And if that were to become the case, I’d also have no regrets for saying for years that that would happen in the show by the end ¯_(ツ)_/¯

I’ve said it before, but by now it would be Disney/Marvel’s loss, NOT mine. Whoever wasted or limited the potential would be the idiot, not me.

I’m simply never gonna feel crazy for noticing what’s happening in a story or silly for daring to hope it’ll be brought to fully satisfying narrative completion. That's just a me thing. Maybe this is because at heart I’m stubborn! But I’d like to think I’m not unreasonable. I can’t control whether writing stays consistent or censorship is overcome... But I just do my best to construct solid arguments, and as long as those arguments remain solid, I stand by them :)

I know not everyone would say the same, or they consider this to be "hope" or "optimism," but I see it as logic based in noticing what the text of a show/story is doing. And personally I also consider blatantly evident subtext to be "canon enough," so if we get my personal minimum, my happiness may still outweigh any potential disappointment for me.

However. Here's what I've come here to say today, in reaction to things I've seen floating around in the fandom:

While I do understand on some level why people worry that Lokius won’t be more explicitly canonically romantic because it could be censored by Disney.... At this point, I don’t understand how people can think Loki/Sylvie will still happen.

As of right now, there’s no way to argue for that in my opinion. (I'd like to see someone try.)

The show has set up a fun but very simple situation from basically the start:

They made romantic love a point of relevance in the show’s story. More specifically, they pointed out Loki's desire for a "real" romantic love, and had him learn the lesson that he doesn't deserve to be alone. They didn't HAVE to do all of those things and tie them together. They CHOSE to make romantic love relevant – and they have actively continued to choose to do that, to the point of including a mirrored dark love triangle in s2 ep3. That narrative thread simply has to be fulfilled.

So if they deliberately established that Loki wants and needs a “real” love, and his relationship with Sylvie was referred to as "fiction" so she cannot be a real love for him.... Who does it have to be?

Obviously it has to be Mobius. And of course, the whole show points to Lokius also, for countless more reasons than just this simple breakdown. But pointing this element out is the simplest argument one can make.

So either...

1. They take Lokius to full narrative completion with explicit canon, as they should and as I expect them to,

or

2. Loki's desire for a real love is left unfulfilled, open-ended, and/or made clear through subtext that it's Mobius.

Those are the options, if you ask me!

This is aside from how Lokius’ love story is now even at the core of the show’s themes and plot, which is an insanely strong vote in favor for their future canonicity.

But for the purposes of this post, I’m talking about whether we'll get explicit romance specifically, like a love confession or a kiss – and I do actually genuinely think we'll get both of those things. I'm not trying to force you to agree with me, but just to be clear, that's where I'm at with it and have been since 2021 lol.

So in regards to worrying about Loki/Sylvie...

They were never really a romance (yes, even in season 1) and they sure as hell aren't now. I can’t imagine they'll become one even IF Lokius is left subtextual.

So what actually remains to be seen is if the writers got to go all the way with Lokius, or if that central queer love story was censored on some level in the end.

My hot take is no one should be ~worrying~ about Sylki at this stage of the game. Free yourselves, people.

If the story starts abruptly going in a Sylki direction, even with only 3 episodes left, I will certainly be the first to say so lol. But I simply sincerely, truly doubt that'll happen.

(Hot take in the footer: this is not the post to get into this at length, but in case this comes up… In this house we do not use the word "queerbaiting." It is a useless, nearly-meaningless, insufferable term that devalues the legitimacy of subtext and queercoding more often than not; it's rooted in the idea that media must hit arbitrary and inconsistent checklists often set with cishet approval in mind; and it perpetuates a focus on the false and harmful myth that many creators are "cowards" instead of leaving room for nuance and the fact that industry censorship still exists.)