#ALSO DONT fucking drink their coffee if u can

[daemour]

I Can See You

Pairing: single dad! Seonghwa x babysitter! f! yn

Word Count: 10,137

Warnings: cursing, alcohol consumption, a creepy old man in one scene, age gap (10 years but both are adults (and not just barely)), smut warnings under cut

Genre: Angst, fluff, smut, single parent au, M for mature audiences

Summary: When you took a job babysitting a young toddler, you didn't expect to be so drawn to the family. And more specifically, her frustratingly hot and single dad.

Smut Warnings: masturbation, sexual fantasies, riding, slight (if you squint) corruption kink, sliGHT breeding kink, unprotected sex (DONT DO THIS unless you discuss safely outside of sex!), breast play, overstimulation, undiscussed kinks (yn is fine with it. but discuss your fucking kinks guys *gun emoji*), slight cumplay

thank u to @pyeonghongrie and @mingsolo for beta'ing and for the title hehe <3 this is also a collab with @potatomountain who is also writing a dilf hwa (Bittersweet Neighbours), we're just on two sides of the spectrum lol...and this is so damn long

-

“Hello, I’m here for a babysitter interview with a Mr Park?”

“That would be me. Miss (Y/N)?”

When you answered the ad in the newspaper about babysitting, you were so ready to see an older man, around his fifties. But this man looked so young, around his late twenties although you’re sure he’s probably forty. And you’re not one to judge—nearing your mid-twenties one wouldn’t be expecting you to still babysit as a full-time job. But it pays the bills and helps you get some hands-on experience in your degree, child development.

“Ah, yes. That’s me,” your words spill out as you realise he is awaiting an answer. Mentally, you berate yourself for the immediate blunder while Mr Park’s eyes crinkle with amusement.

“Come on in and make yourself comfy on the couch. I’ll be right there. Would you like anything to drink?” Mr Park’s voice is smooth like butter and you have a hard time making sure you don’t get lost in it.

Again, you nod, actual wordy responses jumbled in your brain, walking to the couch and sitting down almost mechanically. If you were mentally present, you would have noticed the smile the older man sends your way.

He doesn’t take too long, returning with two glasses of water. “You didn’t say what you wanted to drink so I just got you water. Is that okay?”

Thankfully, you finally can respond coherently and smile, albeit a little shakily. “Yes, thank you so much.”

You take the glass with both hands, thanking him again quietly and taking a small sip before just holding it as you wait for him to be seated. You’ve felt awkward before, but this is a new extreme. Normally you pride yourself on keeping your cool in front of someone you think is hot, but Mr Park…he’s something else. You try your best to keep your eyes trained on the coffee table, only letting yourself glance at him occasionally so he doesn’t realise just how in awe you are.

“Jihee will be home from school soon, so you’ll see her soon. For now it’ll just be old me and my questions,” Mr Park starts his interview as soon as he sits on the couch across from you. “Now, I saw in your application that your major was in child development? Can I ask why that interested you?”

You blink at him for a moment, not expecting that question. Sure, bringing it up was expected, but the way he sounds like he’s interviewing you for a position in a company amuses you. “Uh…I just grew up with a lot of siblings and their kids. I’m the youngest of six, and the oldest is sixteen years older than me so I have a lot of nieces and nephews as well. Children have always been a part of my life, and my first job was babysitting so it’s something I’m very used to. Child development was just a way for me to learn even more and in a less… hands-on way. Poopy diapers are not my favourite.” You pause. “Not that I can’t change them! Or that Jihee uses them. Sorry. I didn’t mean to bring it up.”

You’re so sure your face is bright red right now as you stumble over your words, and you’re ready to be kicked out, but all Mr Park does instead is laugh at your embarrassment. It’s a little mean but it’s better than your worst conclusion so you’ll take it. “It’s okay,” Mr Park smiles at you. “It’s okay to ramble, it was actually quite amusing. Now, I’d just like to warn you, Jihee has trouble with working on schoolwork. While that usually isn’t an issue, she may be asking you to help her with her homework and reading and I just thought I’d give you a heads up. Would that cause any trouble?”

“It wouldn’t bother me, and I’ll try my best. I took children’s education in college as well so it’d be a good time for me to exercise that,” you laugh quietly. Your first dream was to be a governess, no matter how few jobs there are for that type of work.

Mr Park nods thoughtfully. “Glad to give you some experience in that,” he hums after careful consideration, a smile on his face. “Her struggles lie in understanding the problems and in English. If she faces any difficulty then I can always help out.”

Before either of you continues speaking, his watch beeps and he glances down. Without another word, he stands and goes to open the front door. “Uh–” Your confusion escapes you before you can stop it.

“Oh, Jihee’s almost home and I always leave the door open for her,” he explains, eyes still trained on his watch. “You’ll get to meet her, and then we can discuss more details. And just to reiterate the ad, this is going to be a job that requires a lot of hours. I, of course, will be paying you for any sort of overtime if I need to stay at the office later. Does your schedule still allow for that?”

You hold back your smile. Your schedule mostly consists of scrolling the internet for job opportunities and eating lunch with your friends. “Yes, I can do that,” you affirm. “I’ll need holidays off, but I assume that’s a given as you’ll also be with Jihee?”

A smile pulls at the corner of Mr Park’s mouth. “Very astute,” he chuckles. “Now, here she comes.”

The door swings open without another word from either of you and a little girl dressed in pink and ribbons barrels into Mr Park’s knees. He lets out a quiet grunt, stabilising himself against the door as his hand strokes at her hair. “Hello, Jihee,” he hums fondly. "How was school today?"

The young girl beams up at her father. "So fun!" she grins, her words slightly slurred in her excitement. "Today, Mrs Lee had us do shapes and my favourite colour is blue now! I have so many blue crayons."

Mr Park's eyebrow raises at the mention of crayons. "Do you have them with you?" he asks, and Jihee nods vigorously. "Can I see them?"

Another nod comes from the child and she immediately plops on the floor, pulling out her pencil case and opening it to reveal at least ten crayons, all of varying sizes. What stands out to you the most is that half of them are green. "See! All blue. But this one's my favourite." She grabs at a particularly long and skinny one, a shade of emerald green.

"Ah. Lovey, remember, your colours are a little different, right?" Mr Park talks in a gentle voice, very different from the very adult voice he used with you. "That's a green crayon."

Jihee's face drops. "Oh." Her bottom lip juts out in a pout.

Mr Park holds out his hand and Jihee drops the crayon into his palm. "You can't take the crayons from school anyway, dear. Why don't we leave these in your bag and you can give them back and apologise to Mrs Lee tomorrow?"

Jihee's pout grows bigger but she nods. "Okay, daddy," she agrees and Mr Park nods proudly.

"Now, do you want to meet your new friend?" You flinch as Mr Park mentions you, sitting up straighter in your chair before ultimately deciding to stand instead.

"Hi, Jihee," you do your best to speak with the same quiet tone Mr Park used. "I'm (Y/N)! It's nice to meet you."

You offer your hand for her to shake and Jihee looks at you, her thinking face almost a spitting image of her father's before she walks over and takes your hand with gusto. "Hi, Mrs (Y/N).”

"Ah, I'm not a Mrs," you correct her. "You can call me (Y/N)."

"Miss (Y/N)," Mr Park quietly interrupts and you nod, not wanting to override his parenting although being called 'miss' will catch you off-guard for the time being. "Why don't you tell her one thing about yourself and then Miss (Y/N) has to go, okay?"

Jihee's mouth twists in sadness, her hand still gripping yours. "Okay," she sighs again. "I get to talk to her more later though, right?"

Mr Park nods. "Of course. Miss (Y/N) will be spending a lot of time with you, so I'm glad you like her."

Jihee nods solemnly. "I like pretty people and you're super pretty," she tells you earnestly and your heart swells at the compliment.

“Thank you, Jihee,” you thank her genuinely, although you’re amused at the fact that she considers her appreciation for physical looks a good introduction to herself. “It was nice to meet you.”

With another decisive nod, Jihee turns and marches right off down the hall, presumably to her room. Mr Park turns to you, finally shutting his front door with a sigh. “That was Jihee. Ball of energy extraordinaire. She comes home from school at one-thirty, and will put her own things away before coming to eat a snack. She has one worksheet to do a day but with your help she’ll get it fairy quickly. I’ll email you a list of house rules.”

You nod. “That sounds perfect. What would the schedule look like? What time would I be here, and when would I expect you to come home?”

Mr Park hums, running a hand through his perfect hair. “For her school days, I’d like to have you in here maybe ten minutes before she comes. I’ll always leave her snack in the fridge and you can just pop it in the microwave and make yourself comfortable before she comes barrelling in. Then I’ll be home at five-thirty sharp whenever possible. Every other Saturday I’m in the office for eight hours and you’ll be watching Jihee for those days. If you can’t do a Saturday, just let me know so I can get someone to watch her, but generally I’d like you here from eight to five.”

You nod. All your friends have atypical work schedules so your Saturdays are empty in general, and since the weekdays are shorter hours you don’t mind. “When it comes to after-school playdates, should I expect you to be home or would you like me to take care of them?”

Mr Park’s lips tighten almost imperceptibly. “That won’t be an issue. Jihee doesn’t do playdates.” Your curiosity spikes at his short answer but his tone leaves no room for discussion so you don’t press it. “I’ll give you a key now. Tomorrow is my off-Saturday but if you can come in just to adjust yourself that would be great. I have some work to get done anyway so I’ll be mostly out of your hair although you can still ask me questions.”

You nod again. “Yeah, that works,” you confirm after a quick check to your phone calendar. When you look up, Mr Park is already holding out a key and you take it after a moment’s hesitation. “I’ll see you tomorrow, then.”

Mr Park nods, moving to open the door when Jihee calls out with a whining tone to her voice. “Daddy, I need help!”

Mr Park sighs but it’s full of affection for his daughter. “I would walk you to your car but she calls for me,” his head dips into an apologetic bow but you shake your head.

“Don’t worry about it,” you smile at him. “There’s no need for that at all.” That is one of the main reasons, but another part of you doesn’t want him to know you have no car and you take the bus to his neighbourhood and then walk the rest of the way.

A twenty-four-year-old with no car? It’s a little embarrassing, especially in the area you both live in where it’s almost required to have a car to do anything. Generally, your babysitting jobs were close enough to your home, but the salary of this job enticed you to give up walking.

As you exit, you can hear Jihee starting off her complaints about her jacket and you smile to yourself subconsciously.

-

You’ve been working with the Parks for almost a month now and generally, it’s a good time. You only really see Mr Park when he comes home, but by then you have one foot out the door. There are days when he looks so beaten down that you want to offer him some encouragement, but you don’t want to step out of your boundaries. So, you just keep your head down and leave.

Jihee is sweet and easy-going, not hard for you to get along with. She always has some sort of fun idea for you to play along with and her schoolwork hasn’t been too terrible although you dread when she starts getting into more difficult maths.

But today, as soon as Jihee walks into the door, you suspect something is wrong. She doesn’t greet you as excitedly as she used to, just stalking straight into her bedroom and coming right now, settling herself down on the couch with a pout on her face.

“Jihee, don’t you want to eat?” you try to coax her to the dinner table, but she just shakes her head, immobile. You frown. It’s strange for the usually talkative child to be this closed off. “Did something happen at school?”

Jihee glares at the coffee table, shaking her head. “No,” she mutters but her cold-stone facade drops immediately as she suddenly bursts into tears. Your heart drops for the child crying on your couch and you immediately run to her and pull her into your arms. “Why don’t they like me?” she wails into your shirt and your heart drops.

You had suspected it when Mr Park shut down the playdate idea very quickly, but this just solidifies your thoughts. How could the kids at school not like such a sweet kid? As you’ve been working for the Parks for quite a bit now, you’ve grown to adore the young girl like she was one of your own nieces.

You don’t say anything just yet, just patting her hair and doing your best to calm her down. It takes almost an hour but now she just curls up in your arms, her hands gripping your shirt as she’s so close to falling asleep. You don’t have the heart to wake up so you resign yourself to letting her sleep on you for now.

Within ten minutes, you fall asleep as well. It’s not what you meant to do, but you couldn’t have stopped yourself. When your eyes open again, Jihee is no longer in your arms and there’s a large fluffy blanket laid on top of you. You blink yourself awake before panic sets in and you shoot up, looking around. “Jihee?” you call out and hear deep laughter behind you. When your head snaps back you see Mr Park chuckling at your face.

“Welcome back to the land of the living, Miss (Y/N).”

It takes a minute for your words to register, blinking stupidly at your employer for a few moments before your face drops and you practically leap off the couch. “I’m so sorry!” you cry, bowing rapidly at a low angle. “I didn’t mean to fall asleep and it won’t happen again.”

You keep your eyes lowered and you look up at him through your lashes, scared of how he’ll react but to your surprise, Mr Park’s smile grows and he shakes his head. “Don’t worry about it, you looked comfortable and the doors were locked. Jihee didn’t get into any trouble, just was a little bored since you were asleep.”

You shake your head. “Regardless, I shouldn’t sleep on the job but thank you for the kindness. Jihee is very responsible for her age and it certainly reflects on your parenting.” You smile back at him.

“Well, thank you for your kind words. It means a lot to me as well,” Mr Park hums. “Would you like to join us for dinner? I know you usually leave around the time I get back but let me at least feed you before you go.”

You frown. “I’d like to, but I should get going,” you say absentmindedly. “I have to make it in time to catch the bus.”

You’re looking around, trying to gather your belongings, when you realise how silent Mr Park is. And in turn, you realise what you just said. “You take the bus?” His voice lowers and you stare at the look of concern he has on his face. “It’s practically dark by the time you leave and you’re walking to the bus stop by yourself?”

“Ah– it’s okay! It’s not a far walk, just up the street.” You hurry to defend your choices, waving your hands. “I’ve gotten home safe so far, no?”

Mr Park shakes his head. “No, you can’t take chances. I’ll drive you home tonight after dinner. You must stay.”

You stare up at him with wide eyes, but his stance is unwavering. And as much as you would usually protest—being taken home by a much older man would usually ring alarms in your head—the idea of not having to wait in the cold and the dark by yourself is very appealing. And from how you’ve interacted with him before, Mr Park seems very sweet, and you trust him just a little more than you probably should.

“Well, I do thank you for your kindness,” you sigh, nodding your head in concession. “But this will be the only time.”

Mr Park chuckles, not taking you seriously. “We’ll see. Now come on. Tonight is beef stew and my younger brother will come for dinner as well.”

“Uncle Uyu is coming?” You can hear Jihee’s excited voice coming from the kitchen as well as her feet pittering on the floor as she launches herself into your lap. “Hi again, Miss (Y/N).”

“Hello again, Miss Jihee,” you tease, pressing the tip of your finger to her forehead and Jihee giggles.

“Are you staying for dinner?” You nod again and she screeches in happiness, not giving a second glance at how you wince at the sound. “I can’t wait! I have to make you pretty! Come with me.”

With as much seriousness as she can muster in her body, she pulls you by the hand into her room as Mr Park watches the two of you with a soft smile and follows the two of you into Jihee’s room. He takes a seat on the bed as Jihee fusses over your hair, styling it with her toddler's hands and putting an obscene amount of hair clips into it. But you’re whipped for the little girl and you let her do whatever she wants, ending up in two uneven pigtails and a plethora of Hello Kitty clips.

“Daddy, isn’t it pretty?” Jihee giggles, moving your head to tilt so her father can take a look at her work. “It’s better than your hair to practice!”

Mr Park, mock-affronted, holds his hand to his chest. “Betrayed by my own daughter? Alas, but I can let it slide as this may very well be your best work.”

Jihee giggles, pressing her face against your cheek when the doorbell rings. “Uncle Uyu!” As always, her focus is diverted by any new thing and she runs for the door, both you and Mr Park following shortly after. As she yanks the door open, a man around Seonghwa’s age greets her just as excitedly, bending down to pick her up and spin her around.

“Jiji,” he cheers, “Already so big?” His eyes find you and you offer a small wave. “And who’s this? Seonghwa, you found a girl?”

Mr Park’s jaw drops and your eyes widen as you rush to contradict. “Oh, no, no, I’m just the babysitter. Mr Park has kindly invited me for dinner.”

Wooyoung chuckles at the look on both your faces. “Don’t worry, I just like to pull on Seonghwa’s leg. You’re a little young for him too.”

You offer a smile. “Yeah, and the forties are a little out of my age range as well,” you try to joke, but to your surprise, Wooyoung breaks out cackling, startling Jihee who starts laughing with him confusedly. Mr Park’s shocked face has somehow become even more intense.

“You think I’m how old?” Wooyoung has reigned in his laughter although a smile still pulls at his lips. “I’m only thirty-four!”

A gasp made its way out of your mouth as you start bowing rapidly again in apology. “I’m so sorry! You look your age, I just assumed you had to be older.”

Mr Park sighs, although an amused smile now graces his face. “It’s okay, I can understand it. I’ll just be giving you a hard time from now on.” He punctuates with a wink and your eyes snap down to Jihee in embarrassment.

“Let’s get on with dinner so I can go home and just melt in embarrassment, okay?” you groan and the two older men laugh. Jihee seems to agree with your sentiment, declaring her hunger grumpily and you laugh and pick her up. “See, even Jihee’s on my side. Let’s eat now.”

Mr Park hums, stepping aside. “All right, I see I’m outnumbered now. I hope you don’t mind how casual this dinner is, but I promise the food is worth it. Wooyoung’s the better cook, but he’s taught me a few tricks.”

You shrug. “Any food is good food to me. At home, I have instant ramen and fried rice so it’s a nice change.”

Out of disapproval, Mr Park shakes his head although the smile does not leave his face. “I do not miss my college diet. Please, take a seat.” He motions to the dinner table, pulling out a chair for you to seat yourself, sitting beside you as Wooyoung and Jihee join the other side of the table.

“So, tell me about yourself (Y/N),” Wooyoung hums, leaning on the table by his elbows. “You’re in college?”

You shake your head. “I graduated a year and a half ago, I’m twenty-four now, but it feels like just yesterday I was taking my finals,” you chuckle. “What was your major, Mr Wooyoung?”

Wooyoung smiled, “Please, call me Wooyoung. Mr Wooyoung just sounds weird. But to answer your question, my major was culinary, of course. Before I taught Hwa how to cook, he was hopeless. I think I was feeding him and Jihee primarily other than his sandwiches and canned soup.” He sighs, leaning back and smirking at Mr Park whose ears are red.

“Hey, Youngah, I paid you for your work. Don’t make me seem incompetent,” Mr Park snorts, leaning over to smack the back of his neck. “Wooyoung may be eight years younger than me but he certainly acts like he’s five.”

You laugh at the banter. “Me and my siblings were the same way. We’d always fight but in the end, we care for each other. It’s sweet to see you guys act the same.” You smile, taking a bite of your stew. “Thank you for letting me sit in on your family dinner.”

Mr Park shakes his head. “Of course. Can’t let you walk on your own at night, you know. I’d be happy to give you a ride home from now on.”

“Ah, no, I can’t make you do that,” you try and decline again but Seonghwa is having none of that.

“It’s not a matter of making me, I offered. I can’t let my babysitter just stand around in the dark. Let me do this for you. Jihee cares for you, she wouldn’t want to make you get hurt.”

You frown, pursing your lips. “I suppose I can’t argue with that,” you concede. “Thank you once again.”

Mr Park shakes his head, his hand moving up to ruffle your hair. “Don’t worry about it.” His hand rests atop your head a moment longer before he remembers who he is in relation to you. “Ah, sorry. Habit from Jihee.”

The heartfelt moment is cut loose by everyone amused at Mr Park’s habit. Jihee immediately takes the initiative to start rambling about stickers, engrossing everyone in the conversation, Wooyoung being particularly vocal. The dinner is finished with no other events, and you offer to help clean up, ignoring Mr Park when he tries to protest.

“Thank you for helping out,” he tries to thank you but you wave your hand dismissively.

“You fed me and are driving me home. It’s the least I could do. Shall we head out though? I don’t want you to have to leave Jihee for too long.”

Mr Park nods, grabbing his keys and jangling them as he opens the door to the garage. You do your best to not show your surprise at the sight of his fancy car. Of course, you knew he was well off, but you never imagined you’d actually be sitting in his car. He even opens the door for you, letting you slide into the passenger seat.

You hold yourself stiffly, but Mr Park looks over and just laughs at you. “Relax, I’m not going to bite you. Just let me know where to go and we’ll be set. Want a piece of gum?”

He holds out a pack of gum and you gladly take the piece, happy for the distraction. Most of the car ride is silent, except for you telling him occasionally where to go. But as he pulls up to your street, he slows to a crawl.

“You know, I don’t want you to be uncomfortable around.me. Sure, I’m your employer, but I’m also a dad. I got the dad instinct, you know?” Your lips twitch at his attempt to be comforting. “Really, though. Don’t hold yourself so tight around me. I don’t mind doing this for you.”

You turn your eyes down. “Thank you. I’ll try, it’s just a little weird for me if you understand. But I do appreciate everything you’re doing for me.” As you unbuckle your seatbelt, you smile at Mr Park. “I hope you have a good night.”

As you go to your apartment building, Mr Park leans out of his car and calls after you. “You can call me Seonghwa, (Y/N). Mr Park makes me feel old.”

You laugh at his admission. “We’ll see, grandpa!” You can’t help but tease him before running into your home, leaving an amused Seonghwa outside.

-

These days you and Seonghwa have become a lot more friendly. He’s taken to driving you home despite your protests and during the car rides, some interesting conversations have happened. For example, you learnt that he built his company from the ground and yet is respected in many old money circles.

Okay, maybe you didn’t learn that from a conversation, and instead just searched on the internet. But what can you say? You’re curious about the man who happens to be your charge’s father and the man who happens to be very very handsome.

Maybe you have a bit of a crush on Seonghwa, but you couldn’t blame yourself. There was something about him. It is the aura he holds himself with, the kindness in his smile when he arrives home, and it helps that he is hot. Every so often, you can’t help but find yourself glancing at his pretty hands, or his well-toned arms, and you have to look away before heat spreads up to your ears.

You’re down bad, and it’s not getting any better. Every time you see Seonghwa, you want to jump him but it would be inappropriate. Not only is he your employer, but he’s also a decade older than you. There’s no way he would be interested in you, he probably sees you just as some kid.

With a sigh, you look down at your sketchbook. Today was supposed to be a fun day. Both Jihee and Seonghwa were off today, so you were spending the day with her as Seonghwa was still called into the office to put in some extra hours. But then the toddler fell sick and you were tasked with taking care of her.

At least it was a fairly easy job—Jihee slept most of the day and you were free to work on some of your more personal projects. Although your passion lies in children, you do enjoy drawing and even took a couple of classes in college. As you lay on the couch sketching, you get so lost in your mind you don’t even register the door opening and the footsteps coming towards you.

“Is that me?”

A shriek rips its way out of your throat as you do your best to whirl around and hold your drawings to your chest, but your legs get caught in the blanket and you instead fall half off the couch to the ground. Your chin props your head up on the ground but your legs are still tangled on the couch, your arms twisted into the blanket, the sketchbook an arm’s reach away.

“Hi, Mr– Seonghwa. How was work today?” you mumble half into the carpet, too embarrassed to look up. “Jihee’s taking a nap in her room.”

After a moment of silence, Seonghwa laughs, although it’s a little pained. “Uh. Do you need help up?”

You groan, pulling one of your arms out from your cocoon prison. “That would be great, thanks. Sorry.”

One of his cool hands gently takes your elbow as another comes to rest on your back. It’s at the moment you realise your shirt has ridden up. You can’t help but tense at the touch, hoping the embarrassment doesn’t show on your face. “Jihee’s taking a nap?”

You’re grateful he chose to brush over the incident. “Yeah– yeah. She’s not much better, but she’s not much worse. It’s just a simple cold, so she needs to sleep it off.” You chose to ignore the hand lingering on the small of your back, instead scooching back on your butt to distance yourself just a little bit. He’s your employer, there’s no way you can give in to your feelings.

But the couch seems to be against your plans, as when you try to pull the blankets off your feet you tumble into Seonghwa’s legs, knocking him down as you land on his firm chest. Your face is mere centimetres away from his and you freeze. “I–” you stammer out, Seonghwa equally as awkward.

“Sorry–” He tries to sit up, but it just results in the blankets twisting tighter and pulling you two even closer together. You swear if you could hold your breath, you could feel and hear his heart beating. “Ah, shit.”

You can’t help but laugh a little at his profanity, not something you’ve ever expected to hear from him. “Welcome back, Seonghwa.”

Seognhwa’s eyes widen, his blush deepens, and his head snaps away from you. Your brows furrow at the change in his features and you can’t help but wonder if it’s from the proximity, or if it’s the proximity to you specifically. “Ah. Let’s get out of this, shall we?” he coughs. He carefully detangles himself from the pile and holds out a hand to you.

You grasp it, noting his firm grip and letting him pull you up. “Thanks.”

“I’ll drive you back to your apartment first since Jihee’s asleep right now. It won’t take long.” While Seonghwa’s voice remains warm, his eyes move away from you.

Suddenly a guilty feeling pools in your stomach and you turn away as well, bending to pick up your sketchbook silently. “Of course.” The disappointment fills your head as you internally admonish yourself for even trying to entertain your fantasies of the older man.

But, to your surprise, a warm hand pats you on your shoulder. “You are good at art, (Y/N). You should continue to pursue and practice it, even as just a hobby.” His words make you look up into his eyes and you see a sparkle behind them. “You’re a talented person, and you should take advantage of it.”

“Thank you, Seonghwa,” you smile at him again. “Once again, I appreciate the kindness you offer me.”

Seonghwa chuckles, spinning the car keys as you’ve quickly found out is his habit. “(Y/N), thank you for putting up with such an old man who can offer you nothing but kindness.”

You snort. “You’re not even that old, you geezer.” In retaliation, Seonghwa leans over and pokes you in the forehead.

“Oh, hush and let me take you home.”

-

It’s been almost six months since that day and your feelings have only intensified. But this time, you swear perhaps he may be returning your feelings too. Sometimes you catch him looking at you with a gentle smile, and his hand on your shoulder lingers a little longer than you think. But then he talks to an employee on the phone and you remember how accomplished he is. Even if he wasn’t much older than you, there’s no way you would fit into his lifestyle.

And, like any self-respecting person would do, you start to avoid him. What else are you going to do? Tell him? You’d be crazy to even entertain the thought. There’s no way he would even take you seriously.

These days you’ve just been going to work, and heading straight home. Seonghwa barely has time to catch you, and you’ve been plotting with Jihee to keep him away. She doesn’t quite understand why, but it’s fun to her so she’s happy to. You’re pretty sure half your wallet has gone to sticker sheets. But no matter how many stickers you’ve bought, it doesn’t help Seonghwa from figuring out something is amiss.

It’s your one day off and you’re spending it at home, lounging around and just watching movies while you sulk about your tangled feelings. Watching all these romantic movies doesn’t help at all and you groan. There’s no way you’re going to act like a lonely teenager, you declare to yourself. You’ll go to a club! Maybe meet someone closer to your age and you won’t feel like a wet sock anymore.

That’s it, you’ve convinced yourself. You’ll give yourself a night out. Suddenly inspired, you throw off the blankets covering you and start donning your nicest clothes. There’s a club you used to frequent in your college days, and you haven’t been back since you got the new job. It’d be nice to let loose again.

As the nighttime approaches, you’re almost all ready to go. You have your outfit and your makeup, and all you need is your shoes. Once you pick out your favourite pair of heels (comfy and not too high), you make your way down. You can feel the excitement pounding out of your chest and you can’t wait to get the night started.

As you enter the club, your body immediately relaxes as you take in the atmosphere. It’s been so long, you’re just excited to have fun. Get drunk, find a nice guy, and forget your problems. You down drink after drink, hyping yourself up, but as late night comes, nothing happens. With a sigh, you plunk down your last drink, feeling the buzz of the alcohol burn in your veins.

Nothing will happen tonight, and you just have to come to terms with it. You place down a couple of bills to pay off your tab, tip, and stumble out of the bar. You’re plastered. You can hardly walk in a straight line and you lean against the cool brick for a minute, letting the sensation sober you up a bit as you do your best to call up a taxi.

But before you can do so, a hand creeps onto your bare waist and your head snaps up to see a man, no younger than fifty, leering at you. “Uh, hi?” you slur out, your hands fiddling with your phone as you try and discreetly move to the phone app. You may be plastered, but you’re not a fool and you know what could happen in this situation.

Unfortunately, the old man seems to know what you’re trying and he grabs one of your wrists. “Now, pretty lady, take a break there. Why don’t you come hang out with me for a bit?” His words are greasy and slimy, and you almost gag at the idea of what he’s insinuating. At least Seonghwa isn’t triple your age…and he’s hot.

“Ah, no thanks,” you manage to push past him, pressing your most recent contact and holding the phone to your ear. “I’m a little uh…” You’re cut off when whoever you call starts speaking.

“(Y/N)? Why are you calling me? It’s nine.” Seonghwa’s voice crackles through the receiver. “Are you okay?”

“Ah, shit,” you groan, stumbling to your side and colliding with the wall. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to call you. I’m just out and–”

Once again, the old man approaches you and pulls you back by the waist. “Come on, pretty. Get off the phone and pay attention to me.”

You shake your head and pull away again, moving even more down the street. “No, no, I’m not– just leave me alone. I want to go home,” you say, shaking your head, still holding the phone to your face. “Just…I wanna go home.”

“(Y/N), are you okay? Where are you?” You can hear the worry in Seonghwa’s voice rise and a faint jingling of keys. “I’m going to get you. Wooyoung’s here so he can watch Jihee. Talk to me, (Y/N).”

“I’m at the club Desire. Or near it. I don’t know.” Your head is muddled and no matter where you look, the street signs are blurring and the old man is still trying to get your attention. “I just want to go home,” you repeat, tears springing to your eyes. “I thought I told you to leave me alone!”

The old man growls at your tone, grabbing at you again. “Don’t be stupid, child. You can come home with me and I’ll teach you how to be proper for a man like you.” His breath reeks of alcohol and bad breath and you instinctively slap him across the face. Surprised, he jerks back, and you take a couple of shaky steps back again.

“Leave me be! I don’t want you near me.”

The old man’s eyes narrow at you and he takes one menacing step forward, his hand raising to strike you but you bring up your arms to block the slap, whimpering in pain when the hit lands and your phone clatters out of your hand. “You insolent child!” Your eyes squeeze shut and you hope Seonghwa gets there soon.

-

Seonghwa has never driven so fast in his life. He’s racing through the lights and he counts his lucky stars that they’re all green and that the police aren’t around right now. He can hear arguing coming from his phone and he’s calm enough knowing you’re at least still on the phone. But then he hears a noise and what he assumes to be your phone falling on the ground. “Fuck,” he mutters to himself. “Please, please be okay, (Y/N).”

Stepping on the gas, he roars around the corner to the club you mentioned, praying you’re still there. As he gets out, he’s looking around but can’t seem to find you. “(Y/N)?” he calls out. “Where are you?”

He races down the street to find you pinned against the wall, your hands attempting to push an old geezer away and he sees red. He marches right up, grabbing his arm and pulling him away from your shaking figure. “Fuck off,” he growls in his face, delighting in the fear that moves across his face. “Don’t let me catch you near this place again. Now fuck off!”

He practically throws the old man to his knees before turning and cupping your face. “Seonghwa,” you practically sob. He can still see the drunken haze in your eyes but it’s almost completely cleared up now and his brow furrows even more.

“Come on, I’m taking you home.” He pulls you along and you do your best to keep up with him in your inebriated state. “I can’t believe you would do this! Have you no sense of security? Why didn’t you get anyone to come with you? Why would you call a taxi outside of the establishment?”

He still opens the car door for you and you slide immediately in, eyes staring wide at the pristine dashboard. He slides in and puts the car in the ignition before sitting back and groaning in frustration. “I hope you’re ready to talk as soon as we get inside,” he gripes. “I still am so shocked, (Y/N). You act so mature about Jihee, but what happened then? You could’ve been hurt…no, you were hurt!”

He continues his rant driving up to your street, ushering you into the elevator and into your place. “Do you know how my heart dropped when I saw you struggling? I don’t want to see you hurt. You need to take care of yourself.”

As he yells at you, his eyes rake over you to see if you’re injured any further, but something else stops him and the words die in his throat. You’re wearing a sheer shirt, your lacy bra underneath just showing off your chest. Your leather skirt has ridden up your thighs and your eyes fill with unshed tears. And something burns in his brain.

It’s been months since he hired you, and with each passing day, he finds himself more and more attracted to you. He berated himself every time these unwanted thoughts popped into his head. Sure, you’re sweet, good with kids, and are passionate about what you care about. But you’re also so young. You can do so much better than him, a single father with no prospects.

But seeing you like this, heat sparks in his gut and he leans in, his face mere inches away from yours. “When you wear things like that, it makes me want to rip them off you and do things even that creep couldn’t even imagine,” his low voice pierces through your thoughts and your mouth gapes open.

“I’m okay with that,” you whisper, hand reaching out to brush against his chest, but Seonghwa blinks as he realises what he just tried to do, and he jerks back. Your eyes flash with hurt and Seonghwa would like to hit himself for doing that to you but he can’t let you come onto him when you’re still drunk.

“I– I’m sorry,” you whisper, your hands reaching behind you to steady yourself on the wall. “I just felt so lonely. I wanted to be wanted.” 

Seonghwa’s breath stutters as he stares down into your wavering eyes. “I–” He wants you so bad. But he can’t bring himself to say it. Not when you’re drunk. “Go to bed. We’ll talk in the morning.”

He turns away and hears your disappointed sigh alongside your footsteps trudging to your bedroom. With a groan, he sits on the couch with his head in his hands. He wants to reassure you, but he can’t help but feel guilty about it. But he’s still straining in his pants and after locating your bathroom, he sits on the shower bench, leaning against the cool tile and breathing in and out. With a groan, he unzips his pants and pulls out his half-hard cock. The feeling of regret rises but he pushes it down to his gut as he spits in his hand and presses his thumb against the head of his dick.

As he wraps his hand around his cock and pumps it, he can’t help but close his eyes and imagine you. You with your mouth wrapped around his cock, with your hands gripping his thighs. You seated on his throbbing member, grinding your hips against him as you lean down to kiss him. He can feel his dick jump and he wonders what it’ll feel like to fill you with his cum.

He lets out a broken moan as his grip turns tighter. His image of you would scratch your nails down his back. He can almost hear your little whines and breathy moans as your hips work over him. You’d lean in and whisper into his mouth, “Seonghwa, fuck me hard,” and—

Seonghwa sighs as he looks down at his cum-coated hand and the mix of shame and relief swirling around his brain. Maybe he should just go to sleep on the couch and hope he doesn’t dream of you. As he washes his hand and goes to lie down, he can already feel a stress headache coming on. He hopes you’ll at least fare better in the morning.

-

When you awaken, you have a throbbing pain in your head and you groan and roll out of bed. You’ve taken your club shirt off as well as your skirt, but your bra and underpants are still on. You’re sure your makeup is smudged too and you have no clue how you got home but all you want is some coffee and oatmeal.

You trudge to the kitchen, rubbing your eyes from sleep. There’s a blanket fallen on the floor so you toss it onto the couch and head straight into the kitchen to start your coffee maker. As you lean against the counter and yawn.

“(Y/N), are you feeling better?”

A voice calls out from behind you and you shriek, whirling around to see a sleepy Seonghwa, blanket wrapped around him and his hair a mess. You shriek again, realising how little you’re clothed and duck behind the counter, your cheeks flaming and your heart beating faster than you ever thought it could.

“What are you doing here?” you force out, your voice tight.

“Do…do you not remember last night at all?” You do remember most of what happened. He took you home, but that’s about as far as you remember. And you’re not sure you want to know the rest of it. But you’re far too embarrassed to admit, so you put your acting skills to use. You’re not sure you can handle the shame of a real conversation.

“What?” you ask, forcing your voice to pitch higher as you slowly stand back up, hands covering your chest. “I didn’t– Oh my God, I’m so sorry if I came onto you. I was drunk, I must’ve been out of my mind. Please accept my deepest apologies.”

You notice Seonghwa’s eyes trail down to your chest and then snap back up to your face as if he’s forcing himself to and he chokes out a breath. Despite the headache, your mouth twitches. Maybe you’re still a little out of it. “No, nothing like that. I fetched you from the club because you called me to save you from a creep. Then I took you home and we slept.”

You sigh. “I’m glad. I do apologise for whatever my behaviour was. It was out of line and it won’t happen again. I understand if you want to let me go–”

“No!” Seonghwa’s outburst surprises you and your eyes widen. The lack of clothes you’re wearing has been long forgotten and you move around the counter to stand in front of him. Seonghwa has the decency to look a little embarrassed at the volume of his voice. “Sorry. I just…it’s like you’re a part of our family already. I care for you just as much as I care for Jihee.”

Ah. He thinks of you like a child. Your suspicions were right. You turn slightly to face away from him, trying to keep the disappointment out of your voice. “I see. Well, I appreciate that. It’s nice to have a second family,” you chuckle, internally beating yourself up. How could you even entertain the thought of the two of you being together? “Let me change, and I’ll walk you out.”

As you return to your room, you finally let your heart sink as tears brim in your eyes. You hastily wipe them away as you rummage in the pile of clothes on your bed for something fairly appropriate to wear. First, you make a fool of yourself in front of Seonghwa, and then your crush is unfounded. You can’t seem to catch a break.

With a sigh, you pull on some shorts and a large shirt before heading back out. “Hey, (Y/N), could we talk first?” Seonghwa asks, still standing in between the kitchen and the living room as his eyes flit around nervously.

After some hesitation, you finally find your voice. “Sure? What’s up? You can sit on the couch if you want.”

Seonghwa takes a seat, hiking up his sweatpants and you move to the floor across the little coffee table. “Last night…you told me something.” Oh no. This is it. You bite your lower lip and look down, awaiting his next words. “Uh. So. You think you came onto me, right? Well. It was. Uh. It may have been me.”

You blink at him foolishly as your brain tries to wrap itself around your head. “You what?”

Seonghwa raises his hands and lowers his head ashamedly. “Let me explain, please. I saw you outside with that horrid excuse of a human and something in me snapped. I just wanted to protect you and I brought you home. But seeing you in that outfit? It just made me want you. And I told you. And you reciprocated. At least, you tried to.” He chuckles a little to himself, bringing up his hand to grip at his hair. “I told you we would talk in the morning. But one thing you said stuck with me. You wanted to be wanted. And all night I’ve been thinking about it. (Y/N), you were drunk. But you weren’t that drunk. Something you said had truth to it. Please. For my own sanity, tell me how you feel about me. Please.”

His voice cracks at the last syllable and something in your heart hurts at the sound. “Seonghwa I…I do care for you. More than I should. You’ve shown me unbendable compassion and you’ve never taken my words or myself for granted…or treated me like a child. Against my better judgment, I’ve fallen for you.” You sigh, tightening your fists. “I’ve been hating myself for the better part of six months because of it. You were so much better than me. In job, in maturity. What was I supposed to do? I went to the club to forget you, but it appears that didn’t work.”

Seonghwa stands quickly, shuffling over to kneel in front of you. “How could you think such a thing? Me better than you? Don’t make me laugh. I may be older than you, and yes, I have a better-paying job. But in the end, how could you compare? You’re amazing with Jihee. You’ve managed to teach her in ways I could hardly hope to imagine. And just because I have a higher wage doesn’t mean your job is less important. I wasn’t lying when I said it felt like you were already part of the family.”

“You told me you thought of me like Jihee,” you argue, and Seonghwa laughs, leaning forward to take your hands.

“I said I care for you as much as I care for Jihee. Not in the same way, (Y/N).” Seonghwa smiles kindly. “I know if this does happen we’ll need to put a lot of care into this, but if you’ll have me, I’d like to be with you.”

You’re not sure whether this is a dream or not, staring up at Seonghwa with wide eyes. You’d be a fool if you said no, but the worries in your head won’t seem to cease. Taking a deep breath, you push them aside and smile up at him. “I’ll have you, Seonghwa.”

As soon as the words fall out of your mouth you can see Seonghwa’s eyes crinkle as he smiles and leans in, his nose almost touching yours. “May I kiss you?” he murmurs in his deep voice, and instead of gracing him with a reply, you meet him in a soft kiss.

His large hands cup your face as he deepens the kiss, and his thumbs brush against your cheekbones. “You’re so pretty,” he hums, pressing a multitude of pecks to your lips. “Last night I was so conflicted. Seeing you like that made me almost go insane.”

An idea sparks in your brain, and a smile widens on your face. Your fingers crawl up his shoulders to rest your arms on them. “How insane?” you ask, and Seonghwa’s eyes darken.

“I’ll show you,” he grows before capturing your lips with his once again. This time his arms shift to wrap around your waist and he pulls you closer until you’re practically pressed against his body. You squeak at the sudden movement but it’s swallowed by the kiss.

He pulls you onto his lap and you can feel the growing hardness in his slacks. You wriggle your hips a little, grinding down, and the moan that Seonghwa lets out is heaven to your ears. “Fuck, (Y/N). You’re so pretty,” he repeats, burying his face in your neck and nipping at the sensitive skin.

You whine at the pain blooming into pleasure and your hands fist into his hair. Your precious sounds get to Seonghwa and he groans, moving your legs to wrap around his waist and he hoists you up and brings you over to the couch. “Your noises are so pretty, baby,” Seonghwa groans into your mouth. “Can’t wait to hear them when you’re wrapped around my cock.”

“Please–” is all you can muster out and your whines only serve to make Seonghwa’s cock harder in his pants.

With a groan, he pats your ass, motioning for you to move up. As soon as your hips lift, he grabs the waistband of your shorts and pulls them down to your knees, leaving your underwear and shirt on. In the same motion, he shoves his slacks and boxers down just far enough to let his cock spring free.

“Seonghwa–”  you whine and something in Seonghwa’s stomach burns at the idea of you crying on his throbbing dick. He sits back, guiding you to sit right above his cock as he moves it to rub against your soaked underwear. Every time the angry-red tip of it brushes against your clit you let out breathy moans and it only serves to make Seonghwa impossibly harder.

“Fuck, I can’t wait any longer,” Seonghwa breathes, his free hand coming up to brush against your face. A smile blooms on your face as you bend to kiss him again.

“Then don’t.”

Something flips in Seonghwa’s brain and he lifts you, pushes your underwear to the side, and lets his cock press into you slowly. The both of you throw your head back and groan loudly at the feeling of him slowly filling you up. He’s not the biggest you’ve had but that doesn’t matter as the sting of the stretch is enough to make you drool. You can hardly speak as you whine nonsense into his ear and let your head drop to the crook of his neck.

“You fit around me so well,” Seonghwa praises, his head spinning at the feeling of finally fucking you the way he dreamed of. It was only yesterday he was fucking into his hand at the thought of you and here he is, only a few hours later, his painfully hard member inside of you. “Look at you, a mess for me. Bet you’ve never been with an older man before. Do I make you feel good, baby?”

You clench at his words. “Fuck, yes, the best I’ve had,” you babble, squirming at the already overwhelming feeling. “You’re so good to me.”

Seonghwa laughs delightedly at how gone you seem to be not five minutes in. “So precious, especially for me, (Y/N). Sitting on my dick so prettily.” He gives a little experimental thrust upwards and you gasp. The noises you make are so addictive, he can’t help but do it again. And again.

You’re panting, moaning as he fills you up so deliciously and your hands grip at his now-wrinkled dress shirt. His cool hands slide up your baggy shirt to shove up your bra and cup your boobs. The weight of them sitting in his hands makes him groan as he leans in to mouth at them through your shirt.

“Been dreaming about these tits since last night. Jerked off in the bathroom after seeing you, you know?” Your eyes widen at the admission and Seonghwa smirks at how embarrassed you look. “Wanted you so bad and you thought I wouldn’t like you in that way? You’re so cute, (Y/N).” He punctuates each word with one thrust after another.

The feeling of his dick pumping into you as well as Seonghwa’s teeth scraping against the soft flesh of your tits makes you so overwhelmed. It’s almost embarrassing how close you are already, and Seonghwa knows it, chucking up at you from between your chest. “Aw, baby, you’re so far gone. Am I that good?”

You cry out and sink your teeth into the junction of his shoulder and neck. You’re trying so hard to keep your noises down but Seonghwa isn’t having any of that. His hand finds its way to your hair, gently tugging on it until your head falls back, exposing the column of your neck.

As his warm breath ghosts over it, you stiffen, and when he moves up from your chest to lick a stripe up it and nip at your earlobe, you come with a groan. Your hips are shaking from the intensity of it but his thrusts don’t stop and soon you’re whining from the overstimulation.

And he still hasn’t come.

“Fuck, Seonghwa, it’s so much,” you groan, mouth hanging open. Seonghwa greedily swoops in to capture your lips once more, licking into your mouth as his thrusts become more and more erratic.

His dick twitches and he groans. “Where do you want me? I’m clean,” Seonghwa mumbles into your mouth.

You shift your hips a little. “I’m clean too and on the pill, so it’s on you. I don’t care, I just want you, Hwa.”

Your words spark something in Seonghwa and he thrusts upwards, once, and his cum starts filling you. It’s searingly hot, settling deep in your gut and you throw your head back and moan so goddamn loud. His throbbing cock is twitching like crazy and it’s still pumping cum into you. Seonghwa’s hand slides down your body to tweak at your nipples, thumb over your flesh, and finally come to rub little circles into your clit.

You gasp and it feels like you’re touching heaven from the extra stimulation. “Gonna fill you up so well,” Seonghwa groans. “Do you think Jihee would like a sibling?” 

Your thoughts all blur together at his sentence and you come again with a groan. Your cunt squeezes around him so deliciously and a sob breaks its way out of your throat, one that Seonghwa eagerly swallows as he kisses you again.

His thrusts start to slow down and you slowly pull off his now-softening dick and settle back down on his lap. His hands push his leaking cum back into your pulsating pussy and you sigh at the feeling.

“Well, that was quite the escalation,” Seonghwa laughs quietly as he pulls both your and his pants back up and wraps his arms around you in a tight embrace. His hand pats your butt and you squirm and slap his chest softly.

“You’re lucky I’m on the pill.” You roll your eyes good-naturedly and Seonghwa hums, capturing your lips in his yet again. He can’t get enough of your plush lips and you’re not complaining at all.

“I’m lucky to have you, period,” he sighs happily. “Thank you for giving me a chance.”

You smile and sit up, ignoring the whines that come out of Seonghwa’s mouth at the lack of contact. “Well, I couldn’t let you be a lonely old man,” you tease and Seonghwa smacks your ass again.

“Can old man do what I just did?” You’re suddenly lying on your back with Seonghwa hovering over you, a crooked smile growing on his face. “Or do you need another demonstration?”

You smile and throw your arms around his shoulders and pull him closer. “I don’t know, sir, maybe you should show me once more.”

With a nip to your lips, Seonghwa leans in and your eyes crinkle at the promise of what’s to come.

[iwantwhaticanthave]

random things i wrote down that helped me & might help u

might add to it later :)

also if there are any spelling mistakes ignooreeee

ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚

tips

- calorie tracker (make a notebook with calories before eating a meal)

- drinks with caffeine will help suppress hunger (e.g : black coffee,energy drinks,cola zero)

- after eating work out for at least 15 min

- after waking up eat after 3 hours then work out, then dont eat anything for 6 hours and then work out again (but dont forget water!!)

when u feel hungry

- all u need is water!

- go on tumbler/pinterest

- watch tv

- play games

- make a song playlist

- read a book

- walk

- color/draw

- look at your self in the mirror

- eat gum

- watch disgusting mukbangs

- clean ur room

- drink water

motivation!!!

- eating junk all day because u ate chocolate is like stomping on your phone because u dropped it

- every time u say fuck it idc theres 100% chance u will care later

- junk food u craved for an hour or a body u craved ur entire life?

- stop rewarding ur self with food ur not a dog

- u are not hungry u are bored

- eating is always a decision nobody forces your hand to pick up the food and eat it

- what u eat in private u wear in public

- you are what u eat

- dont undo the hard work all week on a weekend

- drinkwaterdrinkwaterdrinkwater

- fat lasts longer than flavor

- so u dont dread getting weighed at the doctors office

- if you eat the way you’ve always eaten, you’ll weigh what you’ve always weighed

-if you can pinch it you can lose it

-imagine the numbers on the scale going up after each bite

my fave youtubers that motivate/watch while eating

-supersize vs superskinny

-dance moms

-cindy diaries

-luneats

-whimsicalgirlyy

-peachyair

-amberlynnreid

find the right solution

sweet -> cucumbers, tomato, black coffee

savoury -> banana, water, watermelon

oily -> apple vinegar, green tea

thats it!!💝🐈‍⬛

don’t push yourself too hard there are some days where you feel like you’ve ruined it all but there’s always the next day!! ily 💋💋

[simpjaes]

i became a fan of enha in july. i found milf hunt fic wip in july. i have been waiting for this ever since i got into jay. u dont know what u just did for me. its crazy.

im just thinking of pregnant milf reader and jay as her new husband, loving her newer curves and bigger tits. just like when he used to let the neighbours assume more about his relationship with her, he does the same things. drinks coffee in the patio by the pool with a newspaper in hand. when they do shopping in their town, he has a hand on her hip as she walks, proudly showing off his employer turned wife. The rumours spread by the other women proved to be true, he is her husband. he pounds into her wet pussy every night, he drinks from her leaky tits. He fixes her fence, changes her light bulb, takes care of the little girl who calls him “dad”, he whispers to her swollen belly, builds the new baby a crib. buys matching clothes for their daughter and his child. he proudly shows off to the women he used to work for, that instead of boys his age struggling in tiny apartments with big boy jobs, he can stay lavishly finishing college with building a family checked off his list. his wife gets him to a big boy job too so she can rest with the upcoming birth.

he truly is the absolute trophy husband 🎀 our trophy husband

- noona anon

TROPHY HUSBAND IS THE EXACT. MAN. MH JAY IS!!!! you are also his trophy wife too tho.

me gushing about MH aftermath:

like, you make enough money to take care of him through college, even enough to take time off work during pregnancy etc, he would absolutely be the house husband while you're the money maker. I personally see him dropping out tho, ngl. Like living the full life of being a house husband, maybe getting paid to do odd jobs around the neighborhood like "ooooo can you fix my fence too Jay?" and "Ahhhhh, can you clean my pool like that?"

but ofc, it would still be classy wives tryna get his ass all sweaty and sexy for them to ogle at and he'd always come to you like "Babe, why do i feel like they're bitching me out?" and you'd probably snort, eating the craving food he's bought for your a million times by now like "Well, look at you."

You'd not be super jealous or toxic, even based on your history bc of who jay is, and how he treats you. He's cleaning some lonely wife's pool and he'll just talk about you every time she approaches him. like, example:

"Jayyyy, oh you cleaned it so well, would you like to come inside f-"

"yeah, my WIFE says I'm pretty good at this." and "haha, i should be getting home to my PREGNANT HOT SEXY WIFE"

[there's still the eventual option of him getting a big boy job, but for now i think his sole purpose in life that he wants to fulfill is being a dad. he'd not go back to school or get a big boy job until the kids are in school.]

He would definitely flaunt tho. He'd still likes the attention from other women of course, but for a different reason now, sometimes even seeing the women around town who did get to touch on him back before he landed you and always making damn sure they know what they're missing out on. Hand on your back, lovingly guiding you through the grocery store, kissing on you before you go to work in the morning. SUPER PDA from him. ABSOLUTELY on the porch with coffee like a fucking DAD too. that's the cutest fucking image omfg.

would throw BBQs, and you'd invite all of your friends and they'd snicker and whisper with you over how lucky you are to land such a hottie boy-toy. and you'd always correct them with a narrowed eye like "That's my husband, not a boy-toy" and he'd prove it every time ;-; making the best goddamn bbq in the city, playing with your kids and all the others, making all the ladies super jealous that their husbands are too "manly" to play dolls or dress up with the kids, or sword figh the little boys in a fuckin' tutu [bc jay would absolutely do that, wants to make all the kids have a good time when they're in his well-maintained yard]

Even more jealous that Jay does all the house work, cooks, cleans, parents, runs errands etc. he does everything they do for their own husbands, and MORE. The way you glow and flush when they ask about your sex life, phew, boy, they know Jay's gotta be a fuckin' maniac or something in bed.

NOT TO MENTION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! you'd be so so so pregnant.... jay would just, like, constantly be so so horny.

always touching on you, always massaging the pain away and trying to contain his cock because he neeeeeeeeeeeds youuu. def sucks your tits every night, esp when you start lactating KJFHSDKJFDS and you're like "ewwww jay that's so gross" all playfully, but his mouth always soothes your sore tits, and he wouldn't care anyway. he loves his mama, fr. loves even more when she stops calling him "Jay" or "Jongseong" all the time and refers to him as daddy in bed.

whispers to your belly all the time, rubbing it, takes you to every doctor's appointment, buys you everything you need [albeit with your credit card lmfao] for real just drops EVERYTHING FOR YOU at any given moment.

And there is a part in the fic where he fantasizes about you waking up every morning filled with his warm cum. He'd do that too, pregnant or not. Condoms are a fucking NO-NO in this house [for now], at least until you've had a third, even then he'd have to get snipped or you'd go on birth control bc there is no way in hell he's not gonna at least pretend to constantly get you pregnant. Jay wants a big family, you only wanted 2. But you've come to the agreement that if you want to have at least one more pregnancy, he will still be here, and he will be doing all of the work outside of carrying the baby.

also, second child is a boy. imagine jay glowing just as much as you are when he finds out.

man, im so soft for him. this is a mess, i just choked out every single thought of milf hunt husband jay all in one go and like, there's more in this broken ass brain of mine too,

for instance, how he asks you to marry him, where you get married, how is family reacts, how your ex husband reacts, your daughter + jay interaction, the birth and him absolutely fainting in the delivery room, how his friends act when they find out what he's been doing etc

[im-yn-suckers]

ponyo

i hate that the pictures dont match color-wise, but fuck it

pairing-bf niki x gf reader

warnings-kissing, cuddling, reader is a little whiny and pouty. eating, kinda sleeping, not proofread, lmk what i missed as usual

"but i wanna watch ponyo!" "so? i wanna watch spirited away!"

you wanted to watch ponyo because you wanted to see how they made the ramen. and also because it was a cute movie. niki wanted to watch spirited away. who knows why, he just wanted to.

truth is, he didnt care what movie you watched, as long as it was Studio Ghibli. he just wanted to see you all whiny and pouty. he thought it was cute. no, he thought you were cute when you were angry.

"fine! how about we do rock paper scissors and whoever wins, chooses?" "fine, but the loser doesn't whine.'' ''ROCK, PAPER, SCISSORS, SHOOT!"

your fist was in rock formation, his was in paper. "WHAT?!" he just stood there laughing as a pout came across your face.

"not fair, i wanted to see how they made the ramen so we could make it" good excuse, y/n. "fine, we can do another round." he said in fake annoyance.

''ROCK, PAPER, SCISSORS, SHOOT!'' tie. "ROCK, PAPER, SCISSORS, SHOOT!" you both pulled paper in the previous round. niki knew you were most likely to pull scissors next. so what did he do? he pulled out paper. (T-T)

''YAYY!" he partially wanted to see you try to replicate the ramen in ponyo. he also didnt like seeing you sad, even if you were being dramatic.

he watched in awe, and when i saw 'in awe' i mean in awe, as you pulled up the movie and ran to get snacks.

he sat down and grabbed a blanket big enough for the both of you. you came back with some chips and a soft drink.

you sat down next to him, opening the bag of chips. niki put his arm around your shoulder, pulled your head near his face, and pecked you scalp. he opened the can of your shared drink and took a sip.

"I-D-I-O-T! B-U-G O-F-F!" "L-I-S-A, I L-O-V-E Y-O-U" " I-D-I-O-T! I-D-I-O-T! I-D-I-O-T! I-D-I-O-T! I-D-I-O-T! I-D-I-O-T! I-D-I-O-T! B-U-G O-F-F! B-U-G O-F-F! B-U-G O-F-F! B-U-G O-F-F" (yes, i did that. Lisa is an ICONIC character in ponyo. fight me)

"why doesnt Lisa understand that Koichi is working and he just cant come home. like yeah, he said he was going to be there but hes your husband. he works at sea! give him a break!" while you complain about Lisa getting mad at Koichi for not being home, niki takes another sip of your drink and licks his lips.

"she's just salty that her husband isn't home all the time" niki smiles and responds to your whines can complaints. "see, baby? be happy that im not salty about you doing whatever." "we're always together!" and it's true. you guys are always together. "i dont care." "whatever. i still think Lisa just wants Koichi to be with her 24/7"

the movie went on and it came to the ramen part. (istg, if yall dont know what im talking about)

"baby!!!! can we make the ramen once the movie's done?? please??" "do we have everything?" "i dont know. i dont think we have green onion" "once the movie's over, we can walk to the store and buy it, if you want" "yesyyesyesyesyes!!!"

the movie ended and you both got up to leave. you walked in, greeted the cashier and headed to get onion. "baby, do we have ham?" "um, i dont know. i'll ask the guys." "no, its okay, we'll just buy some"

you finished shopping and walked home. it wasnt that far of a walk but your legs hurt.

after getting home and making the ramen, you put on spirited away. niki smiled at your action and pressed a kiss to your forehead. you placed the bowls on the coffee table in the living room almost right away and sat next to niki on the floor. he looked at you and hugged you.

the little moments like these made you realize that, niki is your happiness. the coffe table was far away enough for you to climb into his lap, at least until the food was ready.

"are you tired baby?" niki chuckled at you dozing off on his shoulder. "a little, but im really hungry"

"well, the foods ready so we can eat and then we can go to sleep." you got.off of him slowly and ate your food. after, you and niki went to ash up and go to sleep. after all that, you layed down with your back facing niki, only to be pulled into his embrace with his annoyingly strong arms.

he nuzzled his nose into ypur hair and slowly fell asleep.

the end

yalllllll, im back. ive been gone for so long 😭 but i might not be so active tmw bc i need bloodwork done 😓 the doctors didnt ecen tell me why tho. soooooo, whats new?

(i have writers block gimme ideas)

[mylohve]

Hey tell me about your class of 09 headcanons, as many characters (not Jeffrey, don't wanna hear about him) as you like, but my favs are Nicole and Emily

YAYAY I LOVE U SMMM ☆ Nicole ☆

She really likes grapes. She prefers purple ones to the green ones but she'll eat whatever one you give her.

She is somewhat good at drawing. She wont show anyone and it isnt like, good good, but its good. Its proportionally correct and you can recognise what and who it is 😭 does that make sense.

transfem (my favourite hc)

Has accidetly on purpose downlaoded about fifty differnt viruses onto her moms computer/laptop

She genuinly hates looking at herself. She has broken her mirror and refuses to look at herself beause she'll never truely see herself as a girl. ☆ Emily ☆

Half Greek but she never remembers it until she sees her extended family.

Transfem (also in love w this hc)

she likes lemonade. She drinks it alot.

Her parents refuse to acknowledge she has any sort of mental issues.

i saw somewhere abt smth abt emily being sex trafficked?? If anyone can find that ur a star and i'll love u forever bc i cant remeber if it was a dream or acc happened.

☆ Jecka ☆

Fucking HATES being called Jessica, like, she despises it.

Lwk has really bad anger issues

Recognises her parents are fucked up and dont care about her, but she still wants to love them.

Her dad has given her internal bleeding before.

Her redtube addiction is actually bad 😭 like, really bad.

☆ Ari ☆

her home life is relatively normal, besides the fact her dad is homophobic.

She is slightly chubby. Like, just a little bit but she sees herself as an obese whale.

She has body dysmorphia and cant stand to look at herself some days.

Loves writing <33

She thinks boxelder bugs are rlly pretty bc they remminde her of lava

☆ Kelly ☆

feels really lonely because her parents are never home and she's never had a proper connection with them.

Forgets to eat and replaces a lot of her meals with coffee

fills her void of lonliness w sex

Goes to Ari's house a lot because Ari is never doing anything and willing to hang out with her

Her house has heated floors and she loves them so much

Thats all bc im lwk tired lolol but if u want more js sayy (theres alsp more of scroll down on my blog, like to the begingingin) <33

[shingo-naizuke]

Hii! I saw that u replied to me that ur requests are open and I am really happy since there are not enough shatter me hc or ff, uk? And I also like the way u write^^

So, if possible, could I please get yandere Warner x reader?

If you dont feel comfortable with this I totally understand dw! And if u do agree to doing my request, thank you and please go ahead and take your time! Have a nice day and make sure to drink enough water <3

Ty for reading my request! :)

Yandere!Aaron Warner x gn!reader

Content warning——— yandere tendencies, obsession

Author note——— Since you didn't specify the gender I've written it as gender neutral! And since I'm not very comfortable with yandere tendencies, I tried to make it as I like it, sorry if it's short or if it's not like how you expectedit to be but i didnt have many ideas for it 😭.

He would never let you go, and you couldn't leave him either. He showered you with affection every day, every hour, every minute, every second. Right now, you were sitting on the couch with him, his arm around your shoulders. Time alone was rare, but he always tried to be with you, or if he couldn't spend his time with you, he would keep something that reminds him of you, and it could be anything. "Kenji was too close to you today" he suddenly said turning to you "well, we work together that's just how it is" you said, slightly confused, you felt his arm around you tightening "you're mine, not Kenji's, no one else apart from me can have you".

You always knew about his obsession, but you never thought that he would say something like that out of the blue. From the start of your relationship he was protective of you, never letting you go, always checking on you and making sure you were comfortable, getting jealous easily and trying to kill Kenji was something daily, somewhat Kenji loved to push his buttons.

"Kenji just loves to tease you, you know that he would never try anything" you say looking into his green eyes which were darker than usual, you felt a shiver run down your back "do you really have to be his friend, it can be just the two of us, you know?" He says, you shrug."Well, it's not like I can just leave him like that," you say, chuckling a bit, trying to lighten the air, but he remains serious "I can send him away, you know? Making sure he won't get close to you again, never letting him touch you again" you didn't answer, you didn't know what to do.

He suddenly stands up, smiling softly at you. "Want some coffee? I can make it for you" he says, like if nothing happened, you simply nod and he goes to the kitchen

You think about what he said. It was not the first time and surely not the last. You knew he was capable of killing someone without remorse, for God's sake he killed an entire army with a fucking machete. He was definitely capable of killing Kenji or someone else if you didn't stop him. The fact that he could feel everyone emotions didn't make things easier if someone even felt a little bit of attraction for you he would know, and it wasn't a good thing.

Surely he wouldn't like that Kenji was growing an attraction towards you...and you were too

[323cutie]

also dont think abt trying to watch a movie with wooyoung, but EVERY TIME y’all fall asleep half way through. you have been struggling to get through this one film for a few weeks now, and jongho or hongjoong find you both with the credits rolling with the soundtrack of yours snores in the background.

have to start with this one because it Ruins me did u guys know I love wooyoung so much. Did you know hes my favorite person ever

the concept of this is actually so Fucking domestic and sad and stupid funny like. settling down with snacks and blankets and telling each other to Stay The Fuck Awake like there are energy drinks in the fridge for when you start to get sleepy and wooyoung stopped and grabbed you both coffee a little bit before its Serious.

annndddd the two of you get the movie started and settled on the couch. U snack on some treats, play little games on your phone while u listen. And wooyoung is like "will you play with my hair." and you're like No you freak. and then he lays down in your lap and you play with his hair.

and then its 2 hours later and you wake up to the flash of hongjoong snapping a pic of the two of you on the couch and ur like. Wtf. hongjoong just giggles and says you must've fallen asleep, and with the way you look at him you'd think you just watched someone die in front of you. wooyoung wakes up basically right after you and sees the credits rolling and ur pretty sure he starts crying but you can't really be sure. You both decide fuck it! We'll tackle this challenge another time. and return to cuddling on the couch until u drift off again <3

(hongjoong sends the pic to the gc and its you with your head all the way back on the couch, mouth open, and wooyoung practically drooling in ur lap. San sets it as his lockscreen and you swear you can hear mingi laughing from the next room)

[abbyslev]

𝑪𝑳𝑶𝑺𝑬𝑹- 𝑯𝑨𝑵𝑮𝑬 𝑿 𝑹𝑬𝑨𝑫𝑬𝑹

A/N: here’s a stupid idea i’ve had in my brain for a min and i FINALLY finished it! also don’t mind typos or anything, slightly tipsy rn. (dont drink tequila and vodka and use beer as a chaser??? EVER ???) anyway, enjoy enjoy😊👍🏼 my trip is so good currently like you guys i’ve never been so happy :(

WARNINGS: thigh riding, eating out, praise (IS THAT BAD IDFK 🤯), lots of kissing, fingering and whatever else i added in here idk i cant think rn 🤷🏻

You set your coffee down, eyebrows furrowing. “Problem?” Erwin looked up, eyes searching your stressed face. 

     “Yeah, uhm, just some bio homework. I really regret taking this fucking class.” You laugh, spinning your computer around to show him. His eyebrows raised, pushing your computer back to you. Levi approached you two, handing Erwin his food and placing your sandwich beside your drink. He read it over your shoulder before scoffing and sitting down next to Erwin. “Thank you.” He mumbled to Levi before kissing his hand. You scrunch your nose up, making a gagging noise. “In public is crazy.” You tease them with a smile. 

          “How am I supposed to figure this out?” You slap your hands on your face, dragging them down. “Your fault for choosing that class for extra credit.” Levi chuckled. “Shut up.” You roll your eyes. The three of you always met up at the library to study a lot, and today was one of those days. Unlucky for you, you were learning some pretty hard stuff, and had a hard time understanding it. It was starting to stress you out. “Just leave it for another day, email your professor and tell them to explain it better.” Erwin looked up from his computer, meeting your stressed eyes.

        “Hiya, everyone! Oooh, is that stem cells and the tissue formation process?” They leaned over, taking a glance at your computer. You perk up, meeting their excited eyes. “Yeah, do you know anything about it?” You question, watching as they set all their stuff down. They pull up a chair, sitting beside you. “Now you got them riled up.” Levi scoffed. “Oh shut up.” You sigh. “This is one of my favorite topics, since there's so many theories around it and the things that actually happen, which is why it's considered one of the harder topics. I passed this section with an easy 100.” Hange smiled.

         “Do you think you could help me? I can pay you!” You smile. “There's no need! I can help you anytime, you just text me the time and place.” Hange seemed fine on the outside, but on the inside they were exploding. Hange met you through Levi and Erwin. You guys lived next to each other and you hung out with Erwin and Levi a lot. Hange had some lengthy conversations with you but they never hung out with you one on one. This was a big step for them. Levi bumped Erwins elbow, eyeing you two. 

      “That would be great!” You pulled out your phone, allowing them to put in their number.  “What do you study?” You look up at them, admiring their excited brown eyes. “Biology!” they answer with a huge smile. You two engulf yourself in a conversation, completely forgetting the time. It wasn't until Erwin lightly tapped your shoulder, showing you his phone. “Oh, thanks.” You smile. 

         You two pack up your stuff, following Erwin and Levi out. “They’re so cute.” Hange points at their hands. Erwin had clasped him against Levi’s, leading him towards the car. “Did you need a ride home?” Hange turned to you, smiling. “I usually ride with them, but i don't mind riding with you if it's not a bother.” You smile. “Of course not!” Hange lead you to their car. “I’ll meet you guys later!” You called towards the two. “Sounds good.” Erwin waved, but gave Levi that knowing look. Hange opened your door, smiling. A certain item caught your eye.

       Hange had a frog plush sitting on their dash. “Where did you get this? Do you know what rare item you hold?” You slowly turn to them as they turn on the car. “Oh, yes. Do you know how much that cost me?” They push up their glasses before pulling off to your apartment. They played quiet music on the way back, occasionally cracking a joke or pointing something out. 

        They pull to a stop, unlocking the doors. “Thank you so much, I owe you lunch tomorrow! Do you just want to come over? It's gonna be crowded tomorrow.” You grab your bag and cup, turning to them. “Oh! Sure!” They nod quickly. “Sweet. Drive safe.” You close their door and wave, before walking inside. You peek out your window to see that they had only started driving off. They waited for you to get inside your apartment. You slap a hand over your mouth, screaming. You run to your bed, kicking your feet and squealing. God, you felt like you were a teenage girl with her first crush. 

        You always admired hange from afar. You had a math class with them last semester and you occasionally talked to them when Levi and Erwin were around, but never alone. You shook with excitement, too excited to do anything else. Hange was perfect in every way and now they were going to help you? You thanked yourself for keeping calm in front of them. You got up, heading to the shower. You had no idea how you were going to go to bed with this much excitement.

-

        You deep cleaned your apartment, and it felt like you were overdoing everything. A knock echoed through your home. You opened the door, smiling. 

          Hange had many books and a bag of food in their hand. “Come on in.” You smile, moving aside. “You can sit on the dinner table.” “Thanks!” They sit down. You join the, pulling out your computer. “You didn't have to get me anything!” You shake your head as they slide a bagel towards you. “Want anything to drink?” You offer. “A water is fine!” You stood up, grabbing two bottles from the fridge. You hand them one, sitting back down. 

       “So, where do you want to start?” They lean over to see your computer. “Here,” You pint. “Thats where we have to start, but its hard to understand it, i cant find theories in out book so i cant understand it.” You sigh. Hange opened a book up, trying to find a section. Their eyebrows furrowed, pushing their glasses up. “Oh! Here it is. This book practically answers everything youre looking for!” Hange slides the book over. 

        It had been a couple hours, and neither of you could explain how you ended up like this. You typed your last paragraph as Hange was above you, arms on either side of you and chin on top of your head. You two spent hours figuring stuff out, and even getting to know eachother. You typed the last sentence bewfore leaning back into their chest, groaning.

“Finally!’ You hit submit, stretching you neck. “See? That wasnt so bad!” Hange smiled. “Not for you!” You joked. “Thanks a lot for that, in really needed it. We have about three more assignments until the final quiz, if you want to help me with those too id be down!” You turn to look at them. It took all your might to not stare at their arms. In the hours of studying, Hange had taken off their flannel, leaving them in their black tank top and sweatoants. 

       “Sure! You just let me know and i can help.” They smile. After cleansing up and making sure they werent forgetting anything, they said their goodbyes and went on their way.

_

FIVE WEEKS LATER

          In the time that had passed, Hange and you had become close, inseparable you could say. The two of you did everything together. It had went from tutoring sessions to hangouts and eventually sleepovers. Erwin and Levi had caught on pretty quick, thanks to Hanges rants about you.  

       Levi handed Hange their food, sitting in front of them. “Levi, you have no idea how cute they are! LIke the way they caught on so quick asnd now they understand more than they could! And they got us this lego set to build, and we had pizza after! So good. And they did my hair too, doesnt it look so kuch softer?” Hange went on and on, their face turning red and eyes sparkling with excitement. Levi raised a brow, drinking his tea. “So youre in love with them?” Levi spat out. “Wha- no! Levi, that’s my friend! Nothing more.” Hange huffed, rolling their eyes. 

            From then on, Levi and Erwin kept an eye on you two. It was the small details that they had caught onto. You wore Hange’s favorite flannel, you always had a hair tie on your wrist if Hange ever needed one, Hange always carried your favorite chapstick and favorite gum. They started to form their own theories about you two. 

        Hange had woken up nervous, today was your big day! You finally had your big test on the things they had helped you study with. They knew how it had been eating you inside, but you had gotten a perfect score on all your small quizzes, so you should nail this, right? Hange sent you a long, sweet message making sure that you were prepared and that you were going to crush the test. You replied back, making Hange squeal. They invited you to dinner afterwards, at their house. You two could bake cookies and watch movies after. You accepted, saying it would ease your nerves.

-

        Hours had passed, and Hange nervously chewed on their fingers. How long would it be until you texted them?

       Suddenly, their door burst open, you running in, shaking a paper everywhere and cheering. Hange stood up from the couch, watching you with a smile. “What is it?” Hange tried to calm you down, but you couldnt stop jumping everywhere. “What is it, lemme see!” Hange grabbed your wrist, trying to get ahold of the paper. A pair of lips met Hamge’s, catching them by surprise. Hange’s eyes closed slowly, hands on either side of your face. You dropped the papers, tangling your hands through their short, soft hair. You two pulled away from the kiss, breathing in for air.

      “I passed with a one hundred.” You smile. Hange’s mouth dropped, eyes meeting the paper on the floor. There it was, a big 100 in red pen. Hange turned to you, pulling you back in for another kiss. You happily kissed them back, smiling against their lips. Hange’s hands slid under your shirt, hands rubbing up and down your waist. You hold on to their arm, whimpering. 

     Hange pushed you against the couch softly without breaking this kiss. You push them back down, throwing your leg over them and straddling them. You pulled your shirt off, the cold air sending shivers down your spine. Hange placed a hand on your bare back, pushing your body closer. They kissed all over your chest, leaving you in a mess.

     You grind your hips against their lap, lips whispering their name. “Be patient.” Hange laughed against your shoulder. “But I deserve it, no?” You pulled back, hands on their side of their face, lips ghosting over theirs. “I’ll show you what you deserve.” They pushed your head towards them, kissing the corner of your mouth down to your jaw.

      “Mngh, fuck.” You unbutton their shirt, hands running up and down their soft stomach. Hange pulled off their shirt, lips busy on your neck. You dig your nails into their skin, sucking in a deep breath as they focus on that one spot. 

         Hange picked you up from their lap, laying you down on the couch. They straddled you, hands palming your chest. Your face scrunched up, lips trembling. Hange kissed down your stomach, eyes focused on your pretty face. 

         They pull down your sweatpants, pressing a wet kiss on your hip bone. “Hange, please.” You yank your pants off, your core aching for some attention. Hange traced shapes on your thighs, running their lips up and down your inner thigh. You bucked your hips foward, hands in their hair. 

       Hange pushed your hips down with force, nails digging into your skin. Seeing you all spread out like this, begging for them was all they could ever ask for. Their lips finally met your wet cunt. Your legs closed around their head, a loud moan leaving your lips. You covered your mouth, stomach caving with every stripe of their tongue. 

         Hange pulled your hand away, placing it on your chest. They squeezed your boob, before slowly trailing their hand down to your thighs. They pushed them up, giving them more access. They pushed two fingers in you, watching as your back arched, fingers trying to find a grip on something. 

        They started off slow, thumb playing with your clit. They rested their head on your thigh, kissing it softly. Their soft, brown eyes met yours, which fluttered with every move they made. Your cheeks were tinted pink and lips were swollen from you biting down on them. 

        “Such a good baby. You worked so hard.” Hange praised you, fingers starting to speed up. Your legs threatened to close at any second, but you tried with all your might to not let them. It felt as if you couldn’t control your body, you were being washed over with euphoria.

      “God fucking damn, Hange!” You manage to spit out. Hange replaced their thumb with their mouth, sending you to the edge. You run your hands through their hair, legs shaking. Hange goes faster, watching as your legs close around their head once again. You arch your back, uncontrollable mewls leaving your mouth. Hange pulls out their fingers, immediately licking you up. 

         “Fuckfuckfuck!” You slur out, eyes shutting closed. Hange cleans you up, holding your waist down again. They come back up to you, kissing you. You messily kiss them back, body too tired to do anything else. 

        They sit down beside you, pulling you back into their lap. It felt like your legs were going to give out at any moment. “Hange…so tired.” You lean into their chest, kissing their neck.  “One more, baby… just one more.” Hange kissed your lips. You slowly started moving your hips against their thigh, light whimpers leaving your mouth. 

      “That’s it, just like that.” Hange helped you, their large hands moving you back and forth. “You did so good. Im so proud of you.” Hange pressed a kiss against your forehead, down to your lips and then your jaw. You fastened your pace, ignoring the ache in your legs.

       Hange looked unreal. Their hair had gotten loose from its usual updo from you messing with it, cheeks were dusted with pink and their eyes were dark and lustful. Their glasses slid off their nose slowly, lips crashing against yours

       Their glasses fogged, making you giggle against their lips. Hange gripped the fat of your hips, crescent-like pink shapes marking your skin. They placed their mouth on your cheek, warm breath fawning your face. They sloppily kissed the edge of your mouth, brain too fuzzy to think of anything else. 

       “I love you so much.” Your hands were on either side of Hange’s face, eyes meeting theirs. Hange felt their heart swell, just a couple weeks ago they were daydreaming about you and now they had you into a moaning mess for them.

        “I love you so much more.” They kissed you hard, wanting to bring you impossibly closer. “Hange, fuck.” You repeated over and over again, legs shaking and fastening your pace. “That’s it.” Hange pushed your hair back, nose against your cheek. 

        Your fingernails dug into their back, curse words and Hange’s name slurring out of your mouth. Hange held the back of your head, other hand on your lower back, bringing you closer. “Fuck, just like that.” They kissed your neck.  You slowed down, feeling their stomach and back, eyes closed. 

      “Should’ve asked you for help sooner.” You said, out of breath. “Mm, I guess we just found a new stress reliever, though.” Hange laughed, kissing your lips. 

[apteryxparvus]

L ♡ V E R ⇌ L ⦻ S E R — chapter 5

Chapter five — Grande Belladonna iced tea with 4 pumps of “Please forget this ever happened”, please

Pairing — Scaramouche / Female Reader

Content warning — swearing • mentions of bullying • brief mention of psychedelic substances

Summary: In a twist of unfortunate events, you find out that being exposed as the target of Kunikuzushi middle school bullying escapades was just the beginning of your troubles. To your dismay, you’re thrown even deeper into the glamorous but artificial world of celebrities. Oh, and the cherry on top? You’re forced to pretend to be in a long-term romantic relationship with none other than said ex-bully. All because of a careless misclick by his social media manager.

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It’s early noon when you slowly open your eyes, the world seeming hazy. Your dry mouth and heavy eyelids serve as reminders of the previous night. Glancing around your room, you note the evidence scattered in the corner — the empty bottle of raki and cups, snack packets, and plates.

With a groan, you rise from the bed and stretch your weary limbs, suppressing a yawn. The tempting aroma of freshly roasted coffee wafts through the air, accompanied by the scent of a mouthwatering breakfast. Following your senses, you make your way to the kitchen, the soft padding of your sock-clad feet barely making a sound along the hallway.

“Morning,” Alhaitam greets you with a brief glance as he expertly flips a msemen in the air, the flatbread landing back in the pan with a sizzle. He’s wearing a novelty apron — a gag gift from Kaveh — adorned with the words “I Beat My Meat” and a playful illustration of a tiny, round creature tenderizing a steak.

Your attention turns to Kaveh, slumped over the kitchen table, his face buried in his hands as he groans softly in discomfort. A steaming cup of coffee sits beside him.

“How—how much did we drink last night?” you inquire. 

“A whole bottle of raki before I had managed to finish the dinner preparations.” Alhaitam’s deadpan response leaves you wide-eyed. It all explains the raging hangover.

He suggests you take a seat and grab a coffee, while he finishes the crispy pancakes. You settle next to Kaveh, cradling your own mug of liquid relief, and observe as Alhaitam skillfully finishes his task.

He arranges the flatbread, arranging the pieces in three portions, and places them on the table. You gently nudge Kaveh awake, and he stirs from his light slumber. Alhaitam adds the final touch to the table — a jar of homemade honey and some soft butter, along with small bowls of nuts and raisins.

“You should probably check your Twitter,” Alhaitam suggests, casually dipping his msemen in the soft honey. Confusion clouds your mind for a moment, but within moments, the hazy recollections from the previous night rush back. Vaguely, you can recall venting to Kaveh about the whole Scaramouche bullying scandal, and unleashing your pent up frustration as a long twitter rant. 

Panic sets in and a sharp ache throbs in your head.

With trembling hands, you unlock your phone and navigate to your Twitter app. Dread courses through your veins, you don’t feel ready to face the consequences of your drunken actions. The thought of the post and of the numerous quote retweets and comments fills you with embarrassment. You delete the post, desperate to erase your public outburst. Taking a deep breath, you navigate to your account settings and switch your profile to private.

Your heart pounds, as you muster the courage to open your message inbox. You silently pray that the vague memory of you insulting Scaramouche is just a mere figment of your imagination.

“Fuck.”

Author’s note: updates might get a bit more sporadic, sorry about that 😅 also, i decided to add the header image to all chapters, so now i gotta go back and fix the previous ones... sigh

psa, dont go ingesting weird plants u see just cuz they're pretty, okei?

Taglist — @scaramoo @bananasquash @yukiipc @theblueblub @feiherp @scarletttcroww @farelady-fate @skyoverkill1 @reversearrowhead @magica-ren @sakurapeach

[carelessflower]

tuesday & wednesday & thursday recap 🍲🌼

so i was lazy so here three recap in one

tuesday starting the day just right with instant noodle! and the met is in the non-oil frier from the day before. to be honest I love this combo lmaoo super full and delicious also I put a bunch of chili packet in it so spicy!

dinner because i forgot to cook the rice so I ordered au, got this at an amazing deal btw so I cant complain much. the fries a bit soggy, the chicken not that spicy and the coke is mini but hey u paid for what u want so

wednesday! it actually the end of the class so the professor treated us to some yummy Central of Vietnam bánh tráng cuốn, the meat is pork grinded then shaped like that, the white thing is rice paper, the fried looking thing is fried rice paper

next i was settling to ready for my office hours (my friend also just randomly give me a whole bag of cereal) and then my professor message like hey im at coffee shop right now why dont you come hang out and I can never turn down free drink so. also I kidnapped my friend on the way there! had earlgrey tea btw. weirdly enough it the first time I tried it, kinda good but I prefer oolong more

next i drag my friend to sniff perfume again cause I dont wanna seem like im broke and friendless. also the sale associate is like smell my poor or something he keep following us around and like being aggressive marketing ugh cant you let me snoop in peace

anyway the first one i try is that, very spicy tho I dont like it even if the sale associate claim it a very gentle smell

this next one more pleasant, almost like the smell after it raining

this one my FAVE very tuberose elegance sorta way, but non boring and old lady like. of course it expensive as fuck. and at this point my friend is like tugging onto my sleeve to get out cause she's so awkward and guilty the sale associate seems so nice and we not buying any. like mind you they get paid to do that and probably cursing us in our mind so

my next victim! i actually smell this before but somehow this time it smell more plastic like idk what happened very disappointed

next one another famous one...idk i keep smelling that weird sharp plastic smell

yes i prefer this version more it's soooooooo fruity like i feel like a cocktail

got pulled in to snuff another section. actually love this one more than the standard one and it so crazy there not any peach note in it but after first spray my impression is all peachy, the flower smell come after then it dried down to musky sandalwood that kinda still last even after I shower lol

went home earlier one hour than usal and it turned out to be the right decision cause it started raining lol. then had nui for dinner!

just wanna show this sichuan sauce with instant noodle, dark Chinese sausage with chili powder I was on final craving

[theslimeologist]

Opinions on dessert types (like a top ten or something?) (also sorry if u get 2 of these i tried sending one and my browser got stuck loading)

dessert types huh? hm..

(did not expect to actually construct a ranked list of 10 dessert genres but here we go)

1: ice cream - it is versatile, it is sweet, it is cold. too cold for you? thats okay! it turns into quite the delicious goop as well!! iced cream is THE penultimate tasty fucking treat. i dont care what anyone else says, ice cream is the salad of desserts. you crave chocolate you have chocolate chunkin brownie bitchin iced creams. okay? and NEVER write off frozen yogurt either, okay? … OKAY?? (it is tasty and well, yogurt is good for you too!)

2: chocolate - erm. yeah. i can just say chocolate. no it isnt just a flavour. chocolate bars, candies, snacks. portable, munchable… expensive. for the best.

3: cookies - the CRUMBLY KIND!!!!! sorry soft cookie enjoyers but when you dunk a soft cookie into milk and you get the same damn cookie but a little COLDER. those thangs dont absorb the milk. and this isnt just about milk dippers- its back to ICE CREAM. you ever crumble a tasty fucking crunchy cookie into a bowl of good vanilla? like. dont get dairy queen. go make some dry cookies right now and use ANY ICE CREAM with actual vanilla bean (extra triple creamy iced creams are kind of a scam they dont taste different and oh also watch out for anything calling itself a frozen dessert that is not truly iced cream.)

4: drinks. Here- have your dessert through a straw, or brave the frontiers with a spoon. milkshakes, iced coffees, ice cream floats, hot chocolates, milk teas.. regular coffee is a dessert to me i guess with this logic. at least with how im drinking it.

5: PASTRIES! Fluffin fuckin tasty flakey holy shit. fresh pastry. uhuh. cream raspberry filling pleaze- littol glaze please… :) croissants count here which gives pastry a very strong edge against any other foods..

6: cake, i guess. has to be good cake. can not have fucking coco nut shreds upon it. can not have pure sugar icing. favourites of mine are cheesecake, a good chocolate cake, and angel food cake with a whipped pudding icing.

7: okay, pie. it can be pretty damn good, it can be very tasty, but the harmony of pastry and filling can be tricky, at least with my autistic DISTASTE for most whole fruits.

8: jello. i had a dream recently that like. i brought back jello foods. and it was good. cause i did it good. so sure. jello. saves your fuckin LIFE while sick, too.

9: dishonourable mentions: popsicles, sour sweets, stuff with cherries, almonds / bland nuts, coconut, fruit chunks according to Slimeo’s 2024 guide to The Ick, black liquorice, “desert pizzas”and anything that is pure sugar. WHICH IS A LOT.

10: brownies. we dont talk about brownies.

0, (ascendant): cinnamon rolls. truly too good and too pure to rank. above all but too humble to hold the title. WE LOVE YOU CINNAMON ROLL

[davejade-sometimes]

whoa writing its like christmas up in here

or something like that

anyway have the first installment of the coffee shop au

---

tentacleTherapist [TT] began pestering turntechGodhead [TG] at 10:47.

TT: Dave.

TT: I went to Karkat’s place of work.

TT: That cafe. Suburban Coffee.

TG: yeah yeah

TG: sburban coffee

TG: theres no u for some reason

TG: karkat thinks that the manager ate it or some weird shit like that

TT: And there’s this girl.

TG: oh?

TT: She types so fast. So well. With such purpose.

TG: one might even say hotly

TT: Yes, Dave. She types hotly. I’m currently twirling my hair and swooning from her sheer typing prowess.

TG: whoa so swoon-worthy

TG: better have someone ready to catch you when you faint from her hot as fuck typing

TT: Come with me today. I'll show you how hot her typing is. And, you can provide a cushion from when I inevitably swoon by being in her presence.

TG: alright

TG: sure

TG: cant say no to an opportunity to get caffeine

TG: and bother karkat while were at it

tentacleTherapist [TT] ceased pestering turntechGodhead [TG] at 10:58.

The cafe is nestled between several other shops, and it announces itself with a bright green sign. Sburban Coffee, it declares in big, blocky lettering. The outside is painted an unassuming gray-brown to match the rest of its neighbors, and there are colourful flowers in flowerpots clustered by the door. In the window, Dave can make out the shapes of many, many people inside.

The door chimes happily as Dave and Rose walk inside. The strong, strong smell of coffee immediately hits Dave. Inside, the cafe is bustling, and every table has at least one person sitting. The walls are a pretty orange, and there’s a wall with potted plants sitting on shelves. He spots Karkat at the register, looking as depressed and mildly angry as he always does. There is a smiley-face sticker on the register, along with a frowny-face. He notes the crab pin on his apron. Karkat is not the type to accessorize; Dave wonders what is different about the pin. Rose tugs him into line, and Dave begins to scrutinize the menu. He never knows what to get from coffee shops. There’s too many fancy names and words to know, and he usually just defaults to a latte. However, this time he feels like he needs to branch out a bit, try something new and all that jazz.

DAVE: hey rose

DAVE: youre smart

DAVE: whats an americano

DAVE: is it like

DAVE: essence de la america

DAVE: does it taste like eagles and football

DAVE: and FREEDOM

DAVE: its not tea right i dont want to be unpatriotic

DAVE: gotta make ol g washy proud

ROSE: It’s an espresso drink diluted with water.

ROSE: Now shush. Look over there.

ROSE: That's the girl.

Dave subtly looks over in the direction Rose indicates. The person in question has their back to him, but he can see that they’re wearing an emerald sweater and a long skirt. They also have the Lesbian Haircut™. He can see why Rose likes them. Rose pulls him forward again as the line moves up. They are now second in line, and Dave still doesn’t know what he wants. He sticks his hands in his pockets and does the patented Cool Guy Slouch to hide his indecision and decides to look at Karkat instead. He can’t imagine a guy like Karkat working at a coffee shop, yet here he is. Green apron, gray sweater. Dave doesn’t think he’s ever seen Karkat wear anything different. He might be an escaped extra from a cartoon TV show. Dave idly wonders why he’d liked Karkat back in high school. He seems all cool and tough from the outside but he’s really just a big, pathetic nerd with an extra large side of wet-cattiness.

BARISTA: hey, i can take you guys over here!

Dave stops staring awkwardly at Karkat and instead turns his attention to things like moving. He studies the barista at their register as they walk over.

His first impression: oh, she’s cute.

Man, what was that line of thought?? He internally winces. Anyway. Lame thoughts aside, the barista is very put together, at least in comparison to Karkat. Granted, the bar is low. So low, in fact, it could be a speed bump. Her name tag cheerfully declares her name as Jade in loopy green handwriting, along with a plant sticker. Colorful pins flash at him from her apron.

ROSE: Dave.

ROSE: Are you going to order?

Dave blinks, startled out of his thoughts. He decides to go for something smooth, suave, dare he say, even cool?

DAVE: uh yeah

DAVE: hey love

DAVE: shit

DAVE: i mean

DAVE: lovely lady?

Dave begins questioning all his life choices, and contemplates throwing himself out the window. Actually, no, it’s a first floor window. That’d just be embarassing. He might catch fire instead. That’s a better option. One flaming hot Dave, coming right up. It would be better than whatever this train wreck of a conversation is.

Thankfully, the barista – Jade – is far cooler than he is, and just laughs.

JADE: hey yourself, good sir

JADE: what can i get you

DAVE: i was hoping you had a recommendation for me

JADE: uhh, well

Jade turns to look at the board behind her, ponytail swinging. Dave takes this moment to regain his composure, ignoring the look Rose is undoubtedly giving him. The eyebrows are so totally up. He can feel their skeptical vibes. He rearranges his face to that of a distant, aloof expression. What flaming dumpster fire? There is only Dave. Cool Dave. He is so calm and composed. Everybody wants to be him when they grow up. Jade turns back around.

JADE: i think the cinnamon caramel chai is pretty good!!

DAVE: alright ill take that

JADE: your drinks will be ready in a minute

Rose pays, and Dave absconds walks calmly over to an empty table and claims it, taking the seat that puts his back to the register. Totally not because of what jsut happened.. After a moment, Rose slides into the chair opposite him.

ROSE: Dave.

ROSE: What was that?

DAVE: what was what you saw nothing there was no dumpster fire

DAVE: besides youre one to talk miss she types hotly huh huh

DAVE: shut up rose put those eyebrows away or ill shave them off in your sleep

ROSE: Dave, I haven’t seen you this bad since-

DAVE: DONT EVEN SAY IT HES RIGHT THERE

Smooth, Dave. Now everyone in the cafe is looking at you, probably even Karkat. He melts into his chair. Can this get any worse? He looks over at the register, checking to see if their drinks are done. Karkat is looking in their direction, vaguely confused. The poor barista that Dave totally ruined any chances he had with her has disappeared. Maybe she ran for the hills from the total weirdo that she just met. Oh, nope, there she is, shaking a bottle of milk. He pretends to stare off into space, in a cool fashion. Out of the corner of his eye, though, he studies her again. He hadn’t gotten much of a chance to before, as he’d been otherwise occupied. Jade is a fairly tall girl with long, dark hair currently up in a ponytail that swings every time she moves. She has round glasses and a pretty smile. Unlike Karkat, she is wearing a tasteful orange shirt with her apron. He notes that she and Karkat move around each other easily – which surprises Dave – and while he can’t hear their conversation, they appear to be chatting. Karkat doesn’t like most people. Dave considers himself one of the lucky few that get to be Karkat’s friend.

---

Well, that was weird, Jade thinks as she begins making the latest coffee order: a latte with four shots of espresso, with a little dark roast on top. She’s a little worried for the girl who’d just ordered it. She hopes that she isn’t responsible for her inevitable death by sheer amount of caffeine. Reaching around Karkat (who gives her a salty look that she knows holds no real bite) for the pitcher, she begins to fill it with water. Beside her, Karkat shifts, and she knows he’s about to ask her about what just happened.

KARKAT: HEY JADE, WHAT HAPPENED?

Called it. Jade has what she likes to call her “KARKAT SENSE.” She can always tell when he’s going to do something particularly weird, which to be fair is pretty much just Karkat’s natural state.

JADE: with the sunglasses dude?

JADE: poor guy i feel bad for him

JADE: he looked like he might die of embarassment

KARKAT: WHAT’D THAT IDIOT DO?

JADE: oh, do you know him?

She pours the water into the espresso machine and starts it, putting a cup underneath. While she waits, she begins to steam the milk.

KARKAT: UNFORTUNATELY, YEAH.

KARKAT: HE’S A FRIEND FROM HIGH SCHOOL.

JADE: oh nice!!

JADE: well i think he was trying to be cool or something

JADE: he tried to say [bad dave impression] hey lovely lady

JADE: but he called me love instead

JADE: it was kind of sad

KARKAT: WHAT A FUCKING LOSER. I CANT BELIEVE I WAS EVER INTO HIM.

JADE: wait, really?

JADE: i cant picture you with him

JADE: he doesnt seem like your type

KARKAT: AND HE ISN’T.

KARKAT: I WOULD NEVER DATE SOMEONE SO LAME.

Jade snorts derisively, and begins to pour the steamed milk over the four shots of espresso.

JADE: like youre that much cooler

JADE: just yesterday i watched you rant for about 20 minutes about spilling some milk on your shirt

JADE: youre just as lame!! admit it

KARKAT: OH FUCK YOU.

KARKAT: YOU ARENT COOL EITHER.

JADE: true, but at least i don’t go around pretending i am

KANAYA: Karkat Shes Right

KANAYA: You Would Be So Much Cooler If You Stopped Trying So Hard

KANAYA: Watching You Is A Little Pathetic

KARKAT: I HATE YOU ALL.

Jade just laughs and gives Karkat an affectionate whack on the back as she goes to set the now finished Latte of Death on the pick-up counter. He grumbles and steps on her toes as he moves past her to the register, serving the next undercaffeinated customer.

[v-anrouge]

Answer some or all, I want to know more about you 👀 that wasn’t the right emoji but oh well I’m using voice to text

Do you have freckles? 

 Do you drink tea or coffee? How do you take it? 

What was the last song you listened to? 

Do you sleep on your back, stomach or side? 

Do you sleep with a stuffed animal? 

Do you prefer drawing or writing? 

What’s your ideal number of blankets to sleep with? 

What’s your favorite band/artist? 

When is your birthday? 

How tall are you? 

What color are your eyes? 

Who are five (or more) people you want to hug right now? 

Fears? 

What’s your favorite color? 

What’s your favorite season? 

Want any tattoos? What of? 

Want any piercings? Where? 

Who is the last person you texted? 

Do you have a best friend? How long have you been friends? 

What/who do you miss? 

How was your day today? 

How much sleep did you get last night? 

Do you believe in aliens? 

When was the last time you cried? Why? 

What’s your favorite decade? 

What are some seemingly childish things you like? 

What’s your favorite book? Or just one you’ve read a few times? 

How are you, really? 

Does it take you a long time to make decisions? 

What are you looking forward to in the near future? 

What are you looking forward to in the distant future? 

If you could go anywhere right now, where would you go? 

Do you sleep with your door open or closed? 

What’s your favorite flower? 

Do you currently have a squish? 

Do you like your middle name? 

Do you prefer dogs or cats? 

Do you have any phobias? 

Do you stay up late?

Do you like the beach? Do you prefer it sunny or cloudy? 

What’s your favorite cartoon? 

Tag 5 of your favorite blogs

Do you have siblings? How many? 

Who was the last person you said “I love you” to? 

Is there anyone you would die for? 

What do you need when you’re sad? 

Have you memorized your phone number? 

Who’s someone you can trust with your life? 

What does your last text say? 

Wild Card. Any question, ask away. 

1- actually yeah but theyre super super super light so u can barely see them

2- coffee, i hate tea. i drink it with milk and sugar

3- more KDA

4- side, shrimping

5- yes:3 rook vil and my childhood plush

6- drawing

7- one, and it has to be thin

8- DONT DO THID TO ME I CANT DECIDE

9- june 19

10- 5'3 💀

11- very dark brown

12- all my mooties

13- abandonment, forests, insects, worm like things, heaven, dogs

14- blue and purple

15- winter 100%

16- yes! maybe of a deer, not realistic tho

17- i want all my piercings back my mom made me take them off so now im only left w my bites and the cheek ones😔

18- my mother

19- my lesbian irl :3 like two years?

20- peace

21- okay-ish

22- like 4 or 5?

23- i don't care for them

24- like 1 hour ago, obey me 💀

25- i don't think there are decades to be celebrated humans are evil in all of them

26- cute things, children movies and cartoons, they make me happy

27- i haven't read in LONG because books in brazil are way more expensive than i can afford

28- okay i think

29- yes😭

30- getting a job that i actually like

31- moving with my irl

32- to my irl's house :3

33- locked shut

34- oleanders!

35- nope

36- HATE IT

37- CATSSS

38- insects, worm like things..i think that's it?

39- yeah💀

40- no, but also yes, i dislike beaches because in there's always those fucking sand dollars , i prefer it sunny because the water is cold

41- GUMBALL!!!

42- I CANT I DON'T WANT TO MAKE ANYONE SAD FOR NOT BEING HERE

43- two older brothers

44- my irl

45- my irl...

46- distract myself and talk to people i like (usually my irl)

47- no i havent 😭

48- my irl <3

49- it's a fight between me and my mom id rather not, sorry

50- I have absolutely no idea what to ask tbh😭 uhmm i guess id like to ask why so many ppl like me

[pesterloglog]

Jade Harley, Karkat Vantas, Dave Strider, Roxy Lalonde

Page 99-105

JADE: the prince’s power grows.

KARKAT: JESUS CHRIST!

JADE: i feel him resonate through the void.

KARKAT: FUCKING GREAT.

DAVE: dude can you chill for like even a single fucking second

DAVE: also are you ok

KARKAT: OH, PARDON THE FUCK OUT OF ME FOR OVERREACTING A LITTLE WHEN MY GOOD FRIEND "POSSESSED JADE" BUSTS INTO MY RESPITEBLOCK AT 5 AM!

KARKAT: NEXT TIME I’LL JUST PULL THE COVERS BACK AND LET HER CLIMB IN!

JADE: i am uninterested in that scenario.

KARKAT: GREAT! POSSESSED JADE ISN’T EVEN HORNY! HOW FUCKED UP IS THAT?

KARKAT: HOW DID YOU GET IN HERE?

DAVE: yeah i may be totally misunderstanding the intricacies of "next gen technology" designed by an idiot in microshorts

DAVE: but im pretty sure i locked that door

JADE: i unlocked it with my mind.

DAVE: fuck

KARKAT: FANTASTIC.

JADE: the prince’s powers are growing, but so are mine.

KARKAT: WOW? COOL? AND YOU HAD TO COME IN HERE AT THE ASSCRACK OF THE MORNING TO TELL US THIS?

KARKAT: LIKE YOU DON’T FLOAT AROUND LIKE A CREEPY PIECE OF SHIT ALL DAY AS IT IS?

JADE: ...

KARKAT: OH, IS THAT ALL? NOTHING ELSE TO SAY?

DAVE: karkat its fine

DAVE: who cares

KARKAT: YEAH. YOU’RE RIGHT.

KARKAT: IT’S NOT LIKE WE ACTUALLY HAVE ANYTHING TO WAKE UP FOR.

KARKAT: GO BACK TO BED.

DAVE: no dude im up fuck it

DAVE: i want coffee

KARKAT: FUCK! FINE! FUCK IT.

KARKAT: I NEED TO USE THE GAPER ANYWAY.

DAVE: oh me too

KARKAT: DON’T FOLLOW ME.

ROXY: oh what up

ROXY: its a whole ass pajama party up in here

ROXY: couldnt sleep??

KARKAT: JADE WOKE US UP BY BEING CREEPY.

ROXY: oh

ROXY: jade why did u do that

KARKAT: WHAT?

KARKAT: OH SHIT, THERE SHE IS! I DIDN’T EVEN HEAR HER FOLLOW US!

ROXY: sometimes a girls just got to get her drift on i guess

ROXY: it be like that

KARKAT: I PREFERRED WHEN ALL SHE DID WAS FLOAT AROUND AND POINT AT SHIT.

KARKAT: AT LEAST THAT WAS QUIET.

DAVE: yall want coffee

ROXY: sure

KARKAT: YEAH, THANKS.

DAVE: hate to give it up to venture capitalism but this coffee is EONS better than the garbage we had on the meteor

DAVE: this ship is maybe the dumbest thing ive ever looked at but its a give and take right

ROXY: maybe u just developed a taste for it

ROXY: i used to think coffee tasted like ass but drinkin it was another thing i felt like my mom woulda done

ROXY: turns out rose drinks tea and i stockholmed my own dumb butt into liking this addictive bean juice

ROXY: well i mean who knows what she drinks now

ROXY: dirk probs tossed the coffee machine out the space window right away

ROXY: dude doesnt "believe" in "substances"

KARKAT: WHY ARE YOU UP ANYWAY?

ROXY: well i wasnt but then somebody screamed like a rooster boned a teapot and had a noisy lovechild

DAVE: yeah thats basically accurate

KARKAT: FUCK YOU.

DAVE: maybe if youre lucky

KARKAT: THAT JOKE STOPS BEING FUNNY WHEN WE’VE ACTUALLY

KARKAT: UH

KARKAT: IS THERE MILK?

ROXY: lmao

ROXY: in the fridge

DAVE: wheres kanaya

ROXY: idk

ROXY: sleepin i hope

ROXY: last time i saw her she was on the second floor

ROXY: no

ROXY: the third floor observation deck

ROXY: this place is huge

KARKAT: PLEASE.

KARKAT: IT’S MAYBE A TENTH THE SIZE OF THE METEOR.

DAVE: yeah dude but that was basically a city

DAVE: this is more like a castle

DAVE: a castle of idk

DAVE: twenty something ennui

ROXY: anybody hungry

ROXY: i was thinkin about alchemizing some pancakes

ROXY: or maybe eggs

ROXY: they all basically taste the same at the end of the day i think alchemized food is like eighty percent imagination

ROXY: but both of you barely eat and its making me anxious

DAVE: damn thanks mom

DAVE: i mean

DAVE: shit

DAVE: dad

DAVE: roxy

DAVE: fuck sorry im tired

ROXY: haha its ok

ROXY: dont worry about it

DAVE: okay but just because our relatives turned evil doesnt mean we have to act like total animals

DAVE: we can still try to respect each others identities and shit

DAVE: anyway im gonna go check on kanaya

DAVE: possessed jade dont follow me

JADE: i am fine where i am.

DAVE: cool

[aroacesigma]

do you have any sigzai hcs (or just hcs about sigma or dazai separately)

you're going to regret asking this . headcanons under the cut cause im gonna feel annoying otherwise . most of them are what i headcanon as happening like post canon in a nice world where everyone is alive and happy lol

sigzais <3

ok so to me they are THE transmasc qpps ever . i might be projecting a little but both dazai and sigma are both so transmasc to me. on one hand you have sigma who wears 10 billion shirt layers and a long ass coat and goes on and on about being an ordinary man, and then on the other hand you have dazai who also wears clothes like that and bandages over his chest

hc sigma as oriented aroace with ???? orientation . hes just very confused . theyre so confused . and dazai as bi aroacespec and not particularly averse to any stuff just doesnt feel the attraction most of the time

poor sigma has spent all this time around fyolai like 'god why the fuck are people like this' and then he meets dazai and is like ohhhhhhh. oh .

when sigma joins the ada (and they will u mark my words) him and dazai end up sharing an apartment

at first dazais excited because maybe he wont be living off horrible cooking

unfortunately sigma also cannot cook for shit . he fucking sucks . legitimately the only thing he can cook is cookies in a packet mix .

sigma is unfortunately going through the same phase that kids of controlling parents go through when they finally get freedom, which is making a bunch of stupid decisions . dazai , being the wonderful boyfriend he is, is encouraging all the dumb decisions because he thinks its funny

most of their dates is just going to cafes because sigma has the worlds most horrendous sweet tooth and sigma has no moral objections to guilt tripping him into it

despite being pretty bad at it themself, sigma has a tendency to hit dazai with a pillow until he takes care of himself

vice versa dazai will be a distracting little bitch and wont stop if he thinks sigma is overworking himself

sigma

he/they sigma is so real to me btw just need everyone to know this . they like messing around with neos as well sometimes i think

even though he's pretty much always tired , isnt really a huge fan of coffee , definitely prefers really fancy tea and energy drinks

decided to run with the whole purple thing cause of his hair , abolutely loves the colour. anything he owns is purple if they can get it .

smiles all happy while listening to music in a way that makes you think its something nice . its not . his only musical requirements are loud and screaming to drown out the Anxiety™

not my headcanon but i saw someone say once that they headcanon that occasionally people get an uncanny valley kinda vibe from looking at him cause of his weird origins and honestly i think thats pretty interesting

very happy to join the ada . not quite as impressed by the paycheck .

like , really not impressed by the paycheck . theyre struggling with the dwindling clothes budget . i can totally see him trying to decide whether he wants dinner or new earrings . and probably picking the earrings .

they get along with everyone at the agency really well . a few people dont really trust him straight up but atsushi and dazai vouching for him shuts that down relatively quickly

he gets along the best with atsushi

they have a friendly rivalry with kunikida . agency productivity going straight up just because those two keep trying to outdo each other

dazai

100% has multiple troll accounts online . he enjoys being a menace . not in the mean way , in the absolutely fucking infuriating kind of way

remained in denial (or more oblivious really) about being trans until he was 16 because he asked chuuya if everyone felt like that one time and chuuya was like well yeah (also trans and stupid)

on a related note (this one is kind of about dazai and chuuya but it still counts) mori was kind of like ohhh teenage boys are so much easier to deal with right ? kouyou decided it was best not to inform him that hrt gives you mood swings .

adhd. adhd. adhd.

hes a candy crush mum . its a problem .

eats everyone at the ada's food . but he doesnt eat the whole thing he'll just take a bite . its high up on kunikidas 'things that make me want to string dazai up by his legs and attach him to a ceiling fan' list

has been known to send 12 yr olds graphic violent death threats after losing to them in video games

he has the music taste of a 14 yr old cishet girl . i will let you decide what that entails .

my deepest apologies for making you read all this but i love them both dearly and i have lots of Thoughts

[fictionkinfessions]

listening to glass animals on loop yearning for Some Guy......... yeag

fuuucking Pesterquest/Friendsim. homestuck/hiveswap. beforus also even tho thats fanmade, my canon is fucked /silly

anyways here's some random thoughts;

charun was so fun where is my buddy

I was not an artist then but i became one. i blame charun AND amisia AND remele but mostly charun.

im going in trollcall order. or at leasy trying to.

tagora was a bitch but he was FUN and had GOOD INTENTIONS PROBABLY. i dont drink coffee anymore but now im making myself wanna try it again

tirona was. certainly someone (i will not write characterhate. daily affirmations.)

skylla gave such good hugs i miss her

I WAS A SOUTHERNER THEN AND I AM A SOUTHERNER NOW SKYLLA WAS HOOOME

konyyl looks intimidating. i promise she is nice.

source; her route in friendsim i forgot the volume name. also me mems.

fozzer. fuck doc scratch.

bronya was my mom. bronya was great. i wanted to bake her cookies.

DIEMEN WAS ALSO GREAT I WANTED TO TAKE HIM TO THE MEAT ISLE OF ANY GROCERY STORE

cirava. i wanted to introduce them to glass animals. genuinely so cool also what. give me ur cool. im lacking.

TYZIAS. MY MOIRAIL. I MISS YOU. SHE WAS SO COOOL :( <>

lynera fucking scared me but she was COOL

vikare. he would be so obsessed with how i have a stepdad that flies airplanes in this life. i would take him to this flightschool

azdaja is fucking funny to just. watch. hes like a bug in a terrarium to me [with love /p]

REMELE KICKS ASS I LOVE HER /p one of The Friends ive ever made. would join in a heist again.

folkyl gets a fucking generator. i dont know if that would work. but i wanted to give her one back then and i still do.

i swear to arceus if i showed kuprum 4chan hed love that shit. immediate;y. HE TYPES LIKE A GREENTEXT TJAT IS HIS TYPING QUIRK i am so tired

zebede. (i will not write characterhate. daily affirmations. part 2.)

amisia i miss you i want to see your art again i can do anything in regards to advice now

also i fucking feel you, girl

daraya. i fucking feel you. i was worried then and i am worried now. i hope u and tyzias stayed friends also

BARZUM AND BAIZLI GAVE ME HEART ATTACKS EVERY FIVE SECONDS BUT I MISS THEM SO BAD. the fuckin goobers. they were so silly i think they should be able to do whatever they want

me too marsti me too. i miss talking abt nothing with her

nihkee was fucking terrifying and the only solace was that i too drank so much milk. not with PROTEIN SHAKES IN IT BUT YOU GET THE POINT.

boldir i had no idea what your deal was in that life but now for some reason you're just like 500% Neater. i dont know why

CHIXIE ONE OF THE FUCKIN "COUNCIL OF BESTIES" CHIXIE I LOVE YOU SO MUCH /p I HOPE YOURE GETTING ON WELL

mallek. this mf is the reason that, after pesterquest memory rememberance, i got snakebite piercings. in cerulean. in other words im fucking gay. matespritcore. I MISS MY WIFE TAILS I MISS HIM A LOT /ref (p.s. i cannot apologize for being weird abt Mallek xoxo)

tegiri I MISS YOUUUUU NUMBER TWO IN THE COUNCIL OF BESTIES. chat everytime i watch anime i remember his fucking face. WHY are you in my HEAD you stinky man /lovingly. i watched kamisama kiss and i think if id watched it in my past life i wouldve showed it to him. pensive emoji. also i was still autistic abt miku back then, and i really wanted to show him vocaloid

elwurd go to therapy /lovingly

MARVUS NUMBER THREE IN THE COUNCIL OF BESTIES. i MISS you you CLOWN. you funny stupid goofy ass rapping CLOWN. i can rap just a little bit and i keep hoping he'd be proud of me. friendship

chahut the Unofficial member of the council. girl i remember having an axe you gave me and i miss that shit I LOOKED SO DUMB HOLDING IT. SHORT ASS PURE WHITE GOBLIN HOLDING AN AXE ABOUT THE SIZE OF MY ENTIRE BODY. THATS WHAT I LOOKED LIKE. i want this energy again. come back and give me an axe COWARD /silly

polypa....... i-have-two-hands-moirailliegance ass situation. tl;dr moirail polyamory. I MISS YOU. i want to sit on a pile of pillows again and ramble about my feelings i cannot describe how bad i miss that. its embarrassing

lanque got grounded for a solid month when we met and i found it fucking hilarious and i still do. me and my new friend who i DEFINITELY did not become friends with because of my MOM. /silly

wanshi HELLOOOO HIIII I MISS YOUUUU :( I MISS SOLDIER PURRBEASTS TOO WE HAD SUCH A FUN BOOK CLUB. reading warrior cats in your honor. watching moonkitti in your stead. etc. etc.

i do not miss zebruh (this dislike does not extend to zebruhs here. hi. he was literally identical to canon in my canon and. i did not fucking like him DKNSLM.)

galekh. im so sorry for the you-know-what-list incident but i was cLUELESS and looking back it is SO FUCKING FUNNY IM SOBBING. you were great i hope you and tagora had a wonderful kissmesisitude idk

i do not miss ardata sort of. yess she locked me in a basement and kinda tortured me but. first friend :(

KARAKO'S TROLLCALL IS JUST "WHO IS THIS?" IM FUCKING CRYING /silly

KARAKO my favorite fucking FREAK. this mf climbed up to my watchtower-hive instead of using the door. this mf scaled FLATT WALLS and I NEVER LEARNED HOW. idek if he can read but i miss him. feral creechur /loving

last but not least; Stelsa. ohmyarceus STELSAAA :(((

emotion.

Stelsa was so fuckin fun she MADE ME GET MY SHIT TOGETHER!!!

so sorry. my shit is not together anymore and it stopped being that way when doc scratch Yoinked my ass... apolocheese.

i try to take care of myself mostly bc Stelsa Would Want Me To shes like the angel on my shoulder /silly

tl;dr um fuck doc scratch i miss my friends and moirails and matesprit :(

~ [#❤️‍🩹💤]

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