#AAAAAAAAAA i barely read over this so i hope it's okay??

[the-fixation-zone]

a drink from hell

okay so i haven’t written fanfic in literal years (and even then, it was only one, unpublished) and my writing in general is rusty, but i saw this  answer by @hurricanezukka and i just. i had to write something. so here it is! it doesn’t follow the prompt exactly, the plot got a little away from me, and if i didn’t just write something i was going to take a billion years on it/not finish it at all so! anyway! the Work!

~5k words

“Your change is three dollars.” Zuko hands over the bills, trying not to wrinkle his nose as yet another person purchases his Uncle’s…concoction. The customer smiles and walks down to the end of the counter, awaiting what Zuko believes can only loosely be considered a drink. He sighs through his nose, turns, and begins crafting. A Thai tea with…boba. He tries not to gag as he finishes it and hands it over with its obnoxiously large straw. The customer’s eyes light up when she sees it, her “thank you!” almost lost in the loud popping of the drink’s seal. Zuko does not say you’re welcome. Instead, he tries to keep his eyes from rolling and goes back to the register. Another day, another delusional person. When Uncle Iroh had said he wanted to try something new in his tea shop, Zuko hadn’t questioned it. It was his shop, after all, and Zuko was only there because of his Uncle’s love. Uncle obviously knew how to run a business without outside influence. But when Uncle had shown him the little…black…balls he intended to put into the most finely brewed tea in the city, Zuko had nearly put his foot down.

“Uncle. What…what are those.”

“They are tapioca balls, nephew! Don’t they look delicious? It will add a bit of fun to drinking tea, if I say so myself!”

Right. Fun. As if drinking hot (or, in this case, cold) leaf juice needed to be a diverting activity. Zuko had said nothing and had dutifully tried one. And then he had just as dutifully spit it out when Uncle wasn’t looking. Honestly, what the fuck was he thinking?

So now Zuko stands behind the counter of the Jasmine Dragon and waits for people to come in and order the monstrosity, forcing him to relive his waking nightmare. Cold tea. And tapioca balls. It isn’t enough to make him rethink working here, but it’s damn close.

“Gooooood afternoon! I hear you guys have something called boba tea?”

Zuko’s eyes clench close reflexively before he remembers the customer service etiquette Iroh tried to drill in him. He opens his eyes and says, through clenched teeth, “Yes. We do. Only place in the city.”

“Wooooow.” The customer is flashing him a bright smile, one that takes Zuko off-guard for a moment. Sure, sometimes customer’s smile at him. It’s usually because they want something. A bit knocked off the price of their drink; to be able to use an expired coupon. But this customer doesn’t seem to want anything. Just the boba. “Is it good?”

Zuko raises his eyes from the smile to the man’s eyes, intending on telling him the honest truth, but he’s arrested by how bright blue they are. Zuko forgets how to form sentences. The customer’s tanned skin makes his eyes look even bluer, the little blue beads in the single braid that comes down into his face tying the whole package together. He has laugh lines.

“Uh—what?”

The customer’s smile falters, just a bit. “The boba? Is it good? I mean, my sister says it’s great, but who can trust a little sister’s taste?” He winks, bringing Zuko into the joke. Zuko thinks about Azula’s taste in, well, anything, and finds himself nodding along.

“Yeah. Yeah, I understand. Uh, a lot of people say it’s good. Like, uh, it’s ordered a lot? Instead of regular tea?” Zuko does not know why he’s asking his customer these statements, but Zuko also doesn’t know why he isn’t just telling him that the boba fucking sucks and to try something else. Maybe it’s because the customer is still smiling, even though by now he’s sure to have gotten a proper look at Zuko’s marred face. Maybe it’s because his hair, the rest of it that’s not in the little braid but is instead in a wolftail, looks so soft…

Maybe Zuko is a bit preoccupied.

“Well, that’s good enough for me! How about I get a small black milk boba tea and let you know what I think?”

Zuko nods numbly, tells him how much it is, and exchanges currency. He’s fairly certain he doesn’t look at the till to do it, but the customer doesn’t say anything about incorrect change so maybe he’s done it right. Zuko makes the tea with shaking fingers. When he finishes, he turns and sees the customer leaning against the counter, looking down at his phone. He looks up, as if he knew Zuko was looking at him, and flashes that smile again. Zuko passes over the tea and their fingers brush.

“Thanks!”

“You’re welcome.”

Zuko watches as the customer walks to a table near the windows, pulls out a laptop (how long had he been wearing a messenger bag?) and gets to work. Zuko, unfortunately, finds it hard to get back to work for the rest of his shift.

 ***

Zuko’s off the next few days and he spends his free time reading. Mostly Wikipedia articles, but if pressed Zuko would defend his habits as educational to the last breath. Besides, it isn’t as if he is just reading them for fun, not that anyone asked. He’s editing. The nature of Wikipedia is such that anyone, even idiots, can create a page. It is a beautiful idea in theory, but in practice it gives Zuko a headache. He doesn’t edit every inaccurate page that he comes across (he’d get nothing else done) but he does look through pages he considers himself an expert on. Species of turtle, types of candle wax, the furnace manufacturing industry—well. There are plenty of things to keep him occupied until his next shift. He very pointedly does not think about the blue-eyed bombshell from the other day who stayed in the shop for several hours, long after he had finished his tea. He also doesn’t think about how, after finishing the tea, the blue-eyed customer had looked up and unerringly found Zuko’s eyes to give him a big, hammy thumbs up with another grin. He doesn’t think about how he’d fumbled the teacup that had been in his hand and blushed furiously, thanking the gods the cup had been empty. He doesn’t think about how, though he didn’t look back at the customer’s table ever again, he could feel the man’s eyes on him. He really doesn’t think about that.

Instead, he thinks about how someone has changed all the mentions of “tortoises” to “turtles” as he viciously changes them back. Honestly, if there weren’t a difference why would there be two separate words?

His next shift is an early one. 7am. Zuko doesn’t mind; he tends to rise early anyway. He comes in a few minutes before his shift starts, unlocking the door and bringing down chairs from their upside-down position on tables. He can hear Uncle in the back, counting change.

“Zuko, is that you?”

Zuko sighs. “Yes Uncle. Were you expecting someone else?”

Uncle Iroh’s chuckle can be heard clearly in the front room. “No, no, just glad you are here. Today is going to be a great day!” Uncle comes through the door to the back, tying his apron around his generous belly. Zuko still doesn’t understand why Uncle, the owner of this shop, insists on working when he could easily just hire someone to take his place. He’s asked a few times, wondering why his uncle doesn’t take an early (or, honestly, past due) retirement, but Uncle always gives him the same answer. He grins, slaps Zuko on the back, and says, “Can’t leave all the fun to the young!” before busying himself with some part of the tea process. Zuko doesn’t understand it, but he’s long learned not to question it. He grabs his own apron and gets behind the counter, taking the glass jars of tea out from the cabinets to display them next to the till. Uncle is insistent that people see the tea before it’s brewed, so they know exactly what they are getting. Zuko doesn’t get it. He looks in the jars and sees different shades of dried leaf, which doesn’t help him choose which one he’ll hate least. But Uncle is the boss, so.

The morning goes quickly, a rush hitting a half hour after they open and holding steady until around nine. Perks of being located near the college campus, the best of which being that students in the early morning are dead-eyed and silent. They take their caffeine and go, without much small talk. Zuko decides to take his break after the rush, knowing another one will start up again in an hour or so. Uncle had decided pretty early on that tea was much better with a snack, and so had added café food to the menu. Oatmeal, avocado toast, and smoothie bowls are part of the Jasmine Dragon’s repertoire, among other tasty things, which brings more people in for lunch than they’d get just serving tea. A blessing and a curse, Zuko thinks. A blessing, because more customers mean more tips. A curse because…well, customers. Zuko throws together a sandwich and starts to head to the back. Uncle always says he’s welcome to eat in the dining room, where the seats are more comfortable, but Zuko prefers not to be seen while he eats. Usually, Uncle leaves it just at that. Today, however, he pushes Zuko a little more.

“Are you sure, nephew? I chose these couches myself for their comfort! I think you will enjoy your lunch a bit better if you sit out here today.” Uncle has an odd twinkle in his eye as he says this, one Zuko doesn’t have the energy to parse through. He looks at the clock, then back at Uncle, and realizes if he wants to have any food at all it’s better to just give in now. Zuko shrugs and heads to the dining room instead, taking an armchair close to the back. The room is, thankfully, empty for now. Not knowing how long that will last, Zuko starts to take a bite of his sandwich when the bell over the door rings. He sighs, moving to get up, but Uncle waves him off and heads towards the till to take care of the customer. Grateful, Zuko sinks back into the armchair, eyes drifting to the newcomer in case they try to give Uncle any trouble. As his eyes find him, Zuko freezes. It’s. The blue-eyed man.

Zuko does not drop his sandwich.

The man walks to the counter, familiar grin on his face, and greets Uncle like they’re old friends. Zuko watches, confused, as they immediately launch into a hushed conversation too quiet for him to make out. He does catch Uncle attempting to subtly point in his direction, though, and feels his ears go red. Better not to worry about it, Zuko thinks, and hunches deeper into his armchair to nibble on his sandwich. Not worrying about it, he keeps his eye on the customer.

Eventually, after it seems the man has finally ordered, the customer moves down the counter away from Uncle, and Iroh starts his tea. Instead of looking at his phone like he did last time, the man looks directly at Zuko and makes a beeline for his corner. Zuko eats a bit faster.

“Hey! You on break?”

Zuko wishes he hadn’t eaten so fast. “Mmph? Uhk, er—”

The other man’s eyes fill with concern and he puts his hands up, palms out. “Whoa, whoa sorry! I should’ve waited, take your time!” He watches Zuko swallow with a soft smile, getting comfortable in a nearby armchair. Zuko tries to tone down his impression of a human tomato.

“I—fuck—hi. Hello. Again.”

The customer’s smile stays soft, but a light comes into his eyes. “Hello. Again. Name’s Sokka,” and he reaches a hand out to shake, “what’s yours?”

Zuko definitely drops his sandwich now (onto the table, thank fuck) and quickly meets the man’s—Sokka’s—hand with his own. Sokka’s hand is pleasantly cool. “Uh, I’m Zuko.”

“Zuko. Cool.” Sokka keeps looking at him, and smiling at him, and should Zuko let go now? Or is it okay, since Sokka hasn’t let go either? Zuko wracks his brain for the last time he shook anyone’s hand and how long the shake lasted and comes up maddeningly blank. Has Zuko shaken anyone else’s hand before?

Sokka’s smile grows. He slowly removes his hand from Zuko’s grip, fingers lingering. Zuko has just enough presence of mind to bring his hand back to his lap, and not leave it dangling in midair like an idiot. It’s a near thing, though.

“Uh, so. What were you and Uncle talking about?” Zuko asks, the first thing that comes to mind.

“Oh! That’s your uncle?” Sokka looks over his shoulder for a second, then looks back. “Oh, uh, nothing? Would you believe nothing? We were just shooting the breeze, you know, real casual small talk.” Sokka does not sound very convincing, but he also doesn’t sound like he’s going to change his story so Zuko doesn’t push it.

“Oh, okay. Yeah, he’s, uh, he’s good at that. Small talk.” Unlike me oh gods strike me down now.

“He seems like a good guy!” The nervous look leaves Sokka’s eyes, which is just as well because that means they’re not shifting all over the place and are firmly planted on Zuko’s face. “Must be nice to have such a nice uncle to work for. All the free boba you want! What a dream.”

Zuko’s eyes widen and he coughs. “Uh yeah. All the…the free b-boba…I’d want. Because it’s so good. Who doesn’t like boba? You like it, right?”

Before Sokka can answer, Uncle comes to their little corner with Sokka’s order: same as the other day, black milk tea with boba. This time, though, it’s a much bigger serving. Sokka’s eyes light up when he sees it, and he thanks Uncle profusely as he stabs into the drink’s seal. Zuko tries to hide his grimace, his question thoroughly answered. He looks at Uncle, intending on asking if he should get back to work, but Uncle just gives him a wink and walks off without saying anything. Flustered, Zuko stays put. Between slurps of tea, Sokka begins to ask him about himself and, helpless, Zuko answers. He makes sure to keep his eyes on Sokka’s face, rather than the abomination he’s inhaling, but really that’s not much better. Looking at Sokka makes Zuko feel like he’s on fire. Every time Sokka asks him something his tongue trips over itself trying to provide the best, most accurate answer. He’s sure he looks like a buffoon but Sokka never comments, just keeps smiling at him and encouraging him to answer. He just wants to know and Zuko doesn’t get it.

“Uh, so. What about you? You were working on something the other day…what was it?” Immediately Zuko wants to take it back, sure he’s asked something too personal, maybe the guy doesn’t want to talk about his work, honestly Zuko just think sometimes—

“Oh! I’m glad you asked, I’ve been meaning to bounce some ideas off someone!” Sokka’s eyes light up like he’s been given another boba as he launches into an explanation of his work. He’s a PhD student apparently, trying to hammer out a decent thesis proposal for his dissertation on medieval war tactics. War isn’t really Zuko’s interest, but he does know a bit about medieval history so he offers advice when he can. He’s sure it’s not very helpful, but Sokka seems to take it all very seriously, even pausing for a moment to bring his laptop out and take some notes. Zuko doesn’t have the heart to tell him most of his information was collected from his Wikipedia hunts. Before Zuko knows it, the lunch rush has come and gone and evening is swiftly approaching. When he finally notices a clock he swears, standing up quickly.

“Oh shit, I should go back to work! Oh man, I left Uncle all alone, I—” He looks around frantically hoping to catch his uncle’s eye.

Sokka stands too, seemingly also unconscious of the time. “Oh wow, yeah it’s later than I thought. I’ve got to go, Katara’s gonna kill me…” He quickly packs up his things, having over time brought out papers and folders along with his laptop, haphazardly shoving things back into his messenger bag. “This was good, though! I really liked talking to you. Until next time?” Sokka shoots Zuko a hopeful look as he puts his items away. Zuko blinks a few times, still in Red Alert mode, but takes a second to look back at Sokka. And nods.

“Yeah. Next time.”

***

Next time is apparently the very next day. Zuko isn’t scheduled but Uncle calls him in last minute, as Jin, one of the other employees of the Jasmine Dragon, apparently called in sick. Zuko isn’t planning on doing anything but sweep through Wikipedia so he agrees, taking a quick shower before heading over and arriving with his hair still a bit damp. Uncle gives him a wide smile when he sees him arrive, which Zuko returns, albeit in a more subdued manner, before he spots Jin behind him. His eyes narrow.

“Uncle. I thought you said Jin called in sick.”

“Ah, nephew, you see….” His uncle has the good grace to blush. “She had called in sick, but it seems she felt a bit better and decided to come in anyway!”

“Uncle, you called me twenty minutes ago. Did she get sick and better within the span of half an hour?”

Uncle shrugs, unperturbed by being called out in an obvious lie. “Who is to say, nephew? Illnesses come and go, sometimes. Since you are here already, why don’t I make it up to you? You go sit in your corner and I’ll bring you some tea!” Uncle has that look in his eye, the one Zuko knows means he’s been caught in something he can’t see yet, which doesn’t make any sense….

It’s then that Zuko looks to “his” corner. And sees Sokka sitting in the same chair as yesterday, tapping away on his laptop.

“Uncle! Did you--?” Zuko doesn’t even know how to finish the sentence, but one look at the conniving old man tells him all he needs to know. Zuko groans. “I’m going home, Uncle.”

“No, no! Why go home if you are already here? You may as well relax your poor feet and have some good conversation while you are at it. Go, go sit and I will bring you and your…companion some tea and pastries.” Uncle makes a shooing motion and Zuko finds his feet have decided to make their own decisions, choosing to carry him over to Sokka. Sokka seems to know he’s there because when he gets close, Sokka turns to greet him.

“Zuko! I didn’t know you were working today! Good to see you.” He indicates the chair opposite him, snug in the corner. “Join me?”

Zuko nods numbly and goes to sit. “I wasn’t working today. Uncle called me in, said Jin called out sick…but she’s not sick. She’s right over there.” He points to where Jin is laughing with Uncle about something. He hopes to the gods it’s not him.

“Hmm. Sick but not sick huh? Well, I guess it’s my lucky day then,” Sokka says, beaming a smile at Zuko. Zuko feels warm down to his toes and musters a small smile back.

“Yeah, I guess.” Zuko scratches the back of his neck, feeling the weight of conversation-making drop onto his shoulders. How do people do this?

Thankfully, Sokka seems to feel no such weight and launches right into a story about his sister and their roommate, a blind girl named Toph who sounds like a handful. Sokka doesn’t look like Zuko’s one-word answers bother him, seemingly content to talk about whatever, switching topics on a whim. It’s…comforting. When Sokka wants something from Zuko, he asks. He doesn’t push and doesn’t stray into awkward territory. He doesn’t’ ask about the scar. At one point, Zuko looks down and sees there’s tea in front of both of them, the usual for Sokka and a smaller version of the same for him along with two croissants. He didn’t even notice Uncle coming by. He doesn’t say anything about the cup of boba in front of him, choosing to pretend he doesn’t see it.

“Oh! Can I get your opinion on something?” Sokka asks, his laptop now out. He looks a little nervous, typing at some keys.

“Yeah, sure, I guess. What is it?” Zuko doesn’t know what Sokka could possibly want his opinion on, but he can’t possibly say no.

“Well, it’s this paragraph. I think I’m describing the reign of this king right, but the way you said it yesterday made so much more sense…” Sokka lifts his laptop to hand it over to Zuko, and Zuko doesn’t understand because he could just slide it over and—oh. Sokka’s fingers brush against Zuko’s in the handoff, and Zuko has no more complaints. He takes the laptop, feeling his face heat up, and tries not to fumble it as he turns it around.

“Oh, uh. Yeah, let me read it.” He does, half his mind on the highlighted paragraph and the other half on how nice Sokka’s fingers had felt on his. “This seems right. If anything I’d just, well…” He turns on track changes and does a few minor edits, hands it back. Hopes Sokka’s fingers will touch his again and is not disappointed. Sokka’s ears seem a bit red but otherwise he doesn’t seem to notice.

“Oh, great! Yeah, see that’s what I meant, you just are so good at that. The words, I mean.”

Zuko looks at him like there’s worms coming out of his eyes. Him? Good with words? What planet is Sokka from? He doesn’t say anything though, just shrugging.

The day passes the same as the one before, Sokka alternating between asking Zuko questions and working on his thesis proposal. Zuko tells him about his love of turtles, and his Wikipedia obsession, though he refrains from calling it an “obsession” and refers to it as “an academic obligation.” Sokka nods as if this makes sense. Zuko finds the courage to ask Sokka a bit too, about his sister (Katara, a bit of a pain but the way Sokka talks about her Zuko knows he loves her), his roommate Toph (exactly as much of a handful as that story made her sound like), his parents (dead mom, Zuko regrets asking, and great dad, Zuko really regrets asking) and his school program. Occasionally Zuko will catch Sokka looking at him in a way he can’t read, like Sokka is puzzling something out. When Zuko catches him, he raises his one eyebrow in question but Sokka shakes his head and goes back to his laptop. Zuko leaves it at that.

When it’s time for the Jasmine Dragon to close, neither are ready for it.

“Time sure flies, huh?” Sokka asks, looking genuinely bewildered at the position of the sun. “I should be getting back.”

“Yeah, me too.” Zuko stands, instinctively clearing the table. “This was. Nice. I’m…glad I came in today.”

Sokka gives him a soft smile, pausing in putting his laptop and papers away. “I’m glad too.”

***

For the next week, Zuko is working every day. When asked why he signed up for seven days in a row, Zuko shrugs.

“Rent is coming up.”

His Uncle, who is very familiar with his nephew’s finances, smiles and says nothing.

And if Zuko’s breaks are spent in the corner of the dining room with a certain blue-eyed regular, well. It’s nobody’s business but his.

He makes sure he doesn’t go over time, feeling guilty about the work he skipped last time, but when he goes back behind the till Sokka doesn’t leave. In fact, he just moves tables, sitting in a chair closer to the counter, angled towards Zuko. Zuko doesn’t know why, but he isn’t complaining. It’s much easier to watch Sokka this way.

The man really was beautiful. Zuko’s never been very good at describing people, wrinkling his nose at the labels people use for body parts. All he knew was that something about Sokka called to him, somewhere deep down, and he didn’t know what to do about it. Or if there was anything to do. Sokka was a customer, after all! He came for his (disgusting) tea and a quiet place to work. And, apparently, to talk to Zuko, sometimes. But that didn’t mean anything. Still. For seven days, Sokka came in and ordered his boba, they chatted during Zuko’s breaks, and Zuko watched him work when he had to go back behind the till. He might have dropped a mug or two. But who was counting? Apparently not Uncle, who only gives him mysterious looks whenever it happens and sweeps up the glass without comment. He also seems to be oddly occupied in the back of the shop, leaving Zuko at the front. Alone. On days when Uncle is not in the shop, but Jin or Piandao are working instead, they also seem to make themselves…scarce, unless there’s a rush. Zuko doesn’t question it, as it leaves him more chances to watch Sokka unobserved.

Somewhere in the middle of the week, Sokka starts coming up to the counter after the lunch rush to ask Zuko some more questions. Mostly about his proposal, but sometimes not. He always goes back to his chair when a customer comes in, ever courteous of Zuko’s job, but Zuko kind of wishes he wouldn’t. Zuko would much rather explain to Sokka his disinterest in organized sports than watch a customer stare at the menu above Zuko’s head for five minutes, just to give a fake laugh and ask what Zuko thinks they should get. Zuko really wishes they would stop asking his opinion on tea.

By the end of the week, Zuko desperately needs a break. All his clothes, even his non-work ones, reek of tea. He doesn’t know how, but they do, and he’s tired. His feet hurt. He thinks he’ll do something violent if he has to make small talk with another customer. But he looks over at Sokka and thinking about the prospect of not seeing him for a few days fills him with panic. Maybe he could come in anyway? But, surely that’d be obvious, right? Maybe he can ask Uncle to loudly call him on the phone…

It’s nearing closing time and Zuko is still thinking about what to do. Sokka’s still there, which isn’t unusual. He hasn’t left before closing time all week. He gets up, stretches, and starts packing his things away. Also not unusual. What is unusual is that, instead of giving Zuko a wave and heading out, he walks up to the counter.

“Hey.”

“…hey?” Zuko’s mind switches from thinking about how to see Sokka in the next few days to how to deal with the Sokka in front of him. “Want a tea for the road?”

“Well, actually…” Sokka brings a hand up to tug at his braid, biting his bottom lip. Zuko tries not to track this motion and utterly fails. “I was wondering. You, uh. You’ve been working a lot this week, haven’t you?”

Zuko blinks. Sokka had noticed? “Uh, yeah. I’m supposed to be off a couple days soon.”

“Okay. Okay, yeah, that makes sense, cool. Would…would tomorrow be one of those days?”

“Maybe? It, uh, could be? Why?”

Sokka tugs a final time at his braid before planting both hands on the counter. “Wellyousaidyoulikedturtlesright?”

Zuko frowns. “What?”

Sokka takes a deep breath. “Well. You said you liked. Turtles, right?”

Zuko nods slowly. “Yeah…?”

“Okay. Okay, so, I’m planning on going to the aquarium tomorrow. I have a free day from—” he gestures to the messenger bag on his shoulder, as if that explains anything at all, “—and was wondering if you wanted to join me?”

Zuko’s eyes widen. “Oh, like. You and me? At the aquarium?”

Sokka seems to gain his equilibrium in the face of Zuko’s awkwardness and grins. “Yeah, you and me. Like a date?” As confident as Sokka suddenly looks, Zuko can tell he’s a little nervous. Zuko rushes to reassure him.

“Yes! Yes. I would. I would like that. A date.”

“Great! Meet here at 2?”

“Yeah. See you then.”

Sokka leaves and Zuko allows himself a solitary fist pump.

***

The next day, Zuko comes in to find Sokka already out front, holding two cups.

“I thought I’d get us some boba for the trip over! Here,” and he hands one to Zuko. Zuko looks at it like it’s going to bite him. Sokka doesn’t notice, having already popped the seal on his and taking a big slurp. Zuko watches the boba balls go up the straw with dread.

“Come on, man, no need to be shy. Don’t even think you have to pay me back, just go ahead and enjoy!”

Zuko’s eye twitches but, as if on autopilot, he stabs into his drink. Takes a few sips. He tries his best, but a ball of boba gets stuck in his straw and he has no choice but to bring it all the way up. The moment it touches his tongue he makes the loudest retching sound, dropping his drink onto the pavement and launching the ball from his mouth to land on Sokka’s shirt.

Sokka, for his part, is in hysterics.

He laughs at him the whole way to the aquarium, and a bit more while they’re there for good measure. In fact, he doesn’t stop laughing until Zuko kisses him, right next to the turtle tank.

 fin

[hongism]

omg i saw ppl talking to you about their dreams and i wanted to tell you mine, but after i tell you how my work day went:

so i have this crush at work, and he’s around the same age as me. we never really talked or anything before today, but when we were making pizzas, he was doing the toppings with me instead for usually doing the dough, and he was like “hey, (my name), i’ve barely interacted with you”

and i was like “yeah 🙄” lol but then we started talking about graduation and high school and all that, and i learned that we were in the same home room in sophomore year before i transferred and i told him that i didn’t remember him until now and he was like :(

like oops lol sry. But yeah, i drew a smiley face like i usually do in the flour, and when he went to stretch the dough, he was like “who drew thi?” and i was like “me” and he was like okay, i won’t ruin it” and he tried his hardest not to mess up the smiley face OMG JUST AH, my heart went all DOOKA DOOKA DOOKA, and you know that cute aggression you get whenever you see something cute or whenever someone does something cute to you? yeah i wanted to punch him in the face at that moment, but cutely ❤️

and when it was time for me to clock out, i was a bit nervous to tell my manager that it was past my clock out time, and my crush was like “just tell him, he’s notorious for not letting ppl go out” and i was like 😳 okay. And where i work is a very loud place, like it’s a pizza place but the oven is like VRRRRRRRRRR the whole day so it’s loud and you have to speak loudly, but i basically cannot speak loudly without my voice cracking and breaking so i asked him to ask my manager to let me off and he did it without question 😩 like he didn’t even judge me on my shyness or anything

but yeah that was my work day, i left feeling rlly rlly good. BUT TO MY DREAM

so, this was all over the place but i tend to have a lot of dreams about being in school even though i hated it lol. But i was in the cafeteria, getting my lunch (and everything was rlly high tech like woah) and once i got my lunch, i had to find a table and save it for when my friends get their lunch. At this point, i didn’t even know who my friends were, i just knew i had to save a table for them.

So fast forward to looking everywhere in the cafeteria, I finally find a table, and then i hear screaming and yelling and i’m like wtf???

I look over and i see TXT running towards me with their lunch, and they’re like “OMG YES LUNCH THANKS FOR THE TABLE YEAH YEAH YEAH” like rlly energetic so i just go with it. We all sit at lunch and just have a normal convo, but Kai and I must’ve been besties bcs we were laughing and playing around so much and it just made my heart so warm

then my, excuse my language, bitch ass sister woke me up, i have never been so angry in my life, like I WAS HAVING LUNCH WITH TXT HOW RUDE

but yeah i then got all sentimental bcs it wasn’t a dream where the events were like WOAH, but it was WOAH to me, because i never had someone to sit with at lunch when i was in school, and i didn’t have that fun friend group, like i was a legit loner. That’s probably why i have so many dreams of when i’m in school with so many friends and having fun rather than how it usually was, with being alone and dreading going to school.

I’m sorry, this got so sentimental lmao, i’m just a rlly sensitive person, and i tend to take everything very deeply. But i still keep thinking about being friends with TXT. When i go to sleep tonight, i rlly hope i have another dream like that. I have very vivid dreams every night, but usually, they don’t make me THAT happy.

Anyways, there’s my occasional ramble because i like reading your rambles lol. Bye-bye <3

-🗡

HI BESTIE im sorry im late oml !!!! hello !!! let's talk about your work day first because i smiled like a FOOL when i read this !!! that's so precious pls i love how adorable that is ;;-; you drawing a smiley face on the flour then him saying he wont ruin it and trying to not mess it up AAAAAAAAAA

just AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA goodness my heart when dooka dooka dooka right there with you oml that's IM PUNCHING AIR! im so glad you had a GOOD DAY AT WORK !!!!!

ahem now onto your dream,,,,,, im SCREAMING PLS???? dreams are so funny bc they're the most crazy and wack things ever sometimes but that's so CUTE and FUN and PRECIOUS! i love that omg ;;-; i hope you have another dream like that too pls 😢💗

and no worries about rambling hehe you know how much of a rambler i am <33

[faunusrights]

OFFAL HUNT REMASTERED LIVEBLOG // CHAPTER 22

IN THIS EPISODE OF SURPRISINGLY TENDER TENDERNESS:

It had her soul by a hook, a barbed arrow digging into her flesh, gouging her bloody the more she tried to escape it.

JUST KIDDING

okay i’m just gonna HOP RIGHT IN if u dont mind me cause we in it now and i DON’T have time to catch you all up go read the fic!!!!!!!!!!!! DONT ASK ME SHIT

A direct line suited her better. From up here, with only the rain between her and the sky, the path ahead was so clear. The tether was a straight line.

a gaydar so refined it comes with its own overlay. sweet.

the planet below her resisted, no matter how she insisted

even when she persisted? 

She pushed, and the force released like a broken dam, propelling her body away from the unyielding world beneath it—she leapt, high into the air, and it was like flying. With huge bursts of Aura, she cushioned her falls and leapt again, from rooftop to rooftop, making a straight line across the city.

can u imagine yr in umbraroot having a grand old time minding yr own business and then u see Very Famous Tenured Professor of Beacon Academy, Glynda Goodwitch, pinging herself across the sky? nobody would believe u. do u think it’d b on the news.

The rain fell hard. It was pitch dark. Glynda had the phantom of a scent: like the last breath of a campfire before it died, like a kinder version of the acrid stench of Grimm, Cinder’s trail was clear as day to her. She was getting close; she could sense it, like blood on the wind.

ISNT THIS NOSTALGIC,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, wow. its like glynda’s abt to ruin vale’s infrastructure all over again,

If Cinder was in a fight, this rain would muzzle her. Glynda remembered it vividly: how frustration tainted Cinder’s face in Forever Fall, how her fire sputtered and died. Even Cinder would lose her edge here, in this cold downpour. If she was in trouble—if she—

remember when glynda realised this for the first time and was like ‘hoho’ only now its made a thousand times worse because u have a crush emotions r hell and yr in the soup now!!!!!!!!!!! YR IN THE SOUP NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

She almost ran right past Cinder—might have missed her entirely, if not for the painful yank at her own soul.

did cinder just hit the ground like a wet grape

“Don’t touch me!” Cinder’s voice was raw. She snarled the words out like a cornered animal and lashed out with one arm, hitting Glynda’s hand away. The other arm was limp, still tucked to her chest.

BE GENTLE WITH KITTY,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, lure her ass out w/ some shrimp on a string,

She shook like a frightened fawn under Glynda’s touch, ratchet tense and wholly spent of strength.

i cannot even describe how many of these scenes i am seeing so vividly in my head and my GOD do i wish i were better at sequential art cause i want to draw them ALL........................ I WANNA DRAW OUT THIS WHOLE THING!!!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAA

god i cant like. TALK ABT THIS SCENE WITHOUT COPY-PASTING THE ENTIRE THING BUT AAAAAAAAAA god. GOD. i just. phew. PHEW. its REAL TENDER. GLYNDA PICKING CINDER UP LIKE A LIL GRAPE AND wait diesel is this the thing you drew art of. diesel. diesel look at me is this that art--

Her fingers bunched in Glynda’s shirt. They were drenched and cold and Glynda hurt so much inside for her—whatever had happened to Cinder this night had destroyed her, that much was clear.

/sips drink see if i were an asshole id say hoohoo the karma but as i am not i say only this: babey 😔

If they recognized her name, they were determined to act normally when arranging the room she asked for.

“hey didn’t we just see her ping across the city a couple of hours ago--” “greg don’t even ask”

“I don’t want to talk about it,” Cinder mumbled. “Leave me.”

“I won’t.”

ough,,,, directly in the kokoro i see

The shower was a collaborative effort; Glynda inspected for injuries while Cinder sat in the tub, warm water pelting down on them both.

other slowburns when they share a shower: hoohoo,,,,,,,, the tension,,,,,,,,, the s k i n offal hunt: what if you got in the shower with yr ex-enemy,,,,,,,,,, to inspect her wounds,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, and you were both girls 😳

Glynda gently roused her own, pressing a tender flow of it through her palms, offering it to Cinder.

Cinder’s Aura was hollow and hungry. Her soul lapped up everything it was offered. Cinder leaned back slightly, like that would help the boost go through faster; or maybe like all she wanted was a kind touch. She didn’t look back. Slowly, the various cuts and scrapes that littered her body erased themselves.

i am loving this mirroring which you probably already guessed but im like wriggling in my chair abt it all,,,,,,,,,,,,,, THIS GAY SHIT. FUCK YEA. FUCK YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEA

She turned off the shower and stepped out, gathering up the biggest towels she had found, bundling Cinder up in one and fluffing her hair again. This time the white towel came away clean. Cinder peered out owlishly, her face a far healthier color despite the purple bruising that remained around her eyes, telling plainly of her weariness.

OKAY straight up that description is so cute i physically clapped a hand to my mouth and went ‘AWUGH’ because BABY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! B A B Y

There was a gulf between them in the hotel bed.

It wasn’t at all like their nights at Cinder’s house. This was closed off. Distant. A thousand questions and answers hung unspoken in the air, heavy like the rain clouds themselves. The two of them were warm and dry, but not much else. There was little comfort to speak of.

see the real slowburn experience is having progress and losing that shit again. we take one step forwards and two back. u get the HIGH and then u get the real low but rn i hope cinders round face smiles once again. nobody who looks that baby like should ever b so sad and thats a fact 😔

Cinder, in her sleep, started crying again. It came and went in disconnected pieces, until she finally cried herself awake, startling out of her dreams.

i sent this crying cat in response to the update announcement but i never knew how real it was until now

again there’s a whole ass section where i cant pick one bit cause its ALL good but GOD this fucking. whole silent conversation theyre having. OUGH. THE SOULMATES.

When Cinder didn’t answer the question, Glynda held one arm out, lifting the blankets between them. “Cinder.”

Glynda didn’t know which surprised her more: that she had offered, or that Cinder accepted.

OH???????????

She settled quietly, face pressed into Glynda’s collarbone, her breath flitting warm over scar-marked skin. Glynda’s arm, curled around her back, weighed her down. Cinder did not hold on to her in return. She was folded up around herself, fitting into the space Glynda had made for her, taking to warmth and shelter like an abandoned child.

OH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ;w; 

also whuh-oh:

The fear was eating her alive, and bit by bit, her skin seemed to unravel, every layer of her body sloughing off into just meat, rent through by that light—it felt like teeth, like destruction, like being twisted apart in some giant’s hands like an insect having its wings pulled out. It held fury like she had never felt. She quailed before it, and it bared its teeth, black tar and grave-rot spilling from between yellowed fangs.

Glynda tried to close her eyes, to look away, to run away, but it seized her like a bear trap sinking its jagged teeth into the wrong prey, snapping a much more fragile deer bone with ease. It sieved her being out from between her ribs, drinking only the cacophony of her soul, lapping up every part of her inheritance—all the while she was fighting, struggling helplessly in its grasp, her mind mere shatterings of bright-red pain, with only slivers of meat and fragments of bone remaining of her body—torn apart by lances of sunlight, burning like fire, a dawn that came with the sound of a scream.

firstly: 👈😎👈

secondly: do i gotta say how i love how visceral this fic is? i say it like in every liveblog. BUT IM SAYING IT AGAIN FOR GOOD MEASURE. IM SAYING IT AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It was coming. It would destroy her. With ease, with relish, it would tear her still beating heart from her chest and discard it, offal from the slaughter—and then it would dig deeper still, to draw out of her that very engine that kept her moving.

is this the closest we’ve gotten to an almost title namedrop?

Glynda stared through the darkness, seeing nothing, but knowing without a doubt that her gaze pointed north like a compass.

HRM............................................. I N 👈 T E R 😎 E S T I 👈 N G

THATS CHAPTER 22 BABEY. it was VERY good. i mean rip cinder’s whole ass but i do love her. i love this evil baby. i also love glynda picking her up with all the effort of picking up a bag of crisps,

[verified-fanmade-deductions]

The End

- This episode gave me too many emotions so just expect me to be rambling nonsensically and screaming, okay? Okay.

- BEATRICEEEEEEEE!!!!! I LOVE HER SHE’S SO CUTE I MUST HUG HER!!!!!!!

- I really love how they kept in the sheer utter amounts of DONE the Baudelaires were with Olaf. No fear anymore, just sheer annoyance. I’m so glad they kept that.

- They really were about to push Olaf off of the boat, huh? GOOD, I would’ve sued if they had messed that up.

- THE ISLAND IS SO FRICKIN BEAUTIFUL AAAAAAAAAAAA

- Friday is so cute aaaaaa I’m love her!!!

- Ishmael is just oPENLY WALKING???????

- That mysterious statue? Heh. Nice reference to ATWQ there sggffghh

- Olaf was really about to go haywire and start shooting everyone, huh? That sure is an Olaf thing to do.

- Olaf’s sudden realization about who Ishmael is was actually so scary, he looked genuinely terrified.

- No healing clay? No magic weather predicting?? Oh well, we still got raw fish!!

- Awwww, no scenes where the Baudelaires are just helping out on the island and being peaceful :((

- Klaus’s Beautiful Jokes TM were removed :((((

- The island is very much a cult

- Man, the Baudelaires are ROCKING those robes.

- And they’re also rocking the boat, if you get what I’m saying ;))

- Of course you do, I’ll just shut up now.

- Speaking of robes, I love the redesign with the pinkish colour!!! Looks like a sunset!!! So pretty!!!

- Olaf sitting all trapped in the birdcage is actually hilarious

- The screaming match of “Let me out first!” “Tell us first!” was literally so great agafsffh

- The Baudelaires just up and leaving, you GO guys!!

- The pathetic “can I at least have a blanket?” added 10 years to my life. Not quite enough years to regain all of the years Netflix stole from me, but ya know. Close enough.

- The tree house looks so cool!!! I want to live there!!!

- Ishmael literally just went and said “drink the cordial” as if this place wasn’t cultish enough.

- KITKITKITKITKIT KIT KIT KITTTTTTTTT!!!!!!!!

- THE BOOK RAFT!!!!!!!!

- WAIT. THE SUGAR BOWL. CONTAINED SUGAR. THIS WHOLE. FRICKIN. TIME.

- And since Daniel Handler’s an executive producer on the show, this means it’s canon...

- Don’t get me wrong I’m not mad!!!!!!! Not at all!!!! I’m frickin ECSTATIC!!!!!!!! We actually now KNOW WHAT’S IN THE SUGAR BOWL THIS IS HUGE NEWS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

- I knew Olaf’s Kit outfit was horrendous, but HOLY CRAP does it look AWFUL!!! Netflix, you really outdid yourselves!

- Ishmael really just went haywire and shot Olaf, didn’t he?

- Well, uh, there goes the deadly fungus I guess.....oops...?

- The Baudelaires stumbling over to the tree whilst coughing their lungs out...

- The Baudelaires flipping through the book desperately, their breathing becoming more and more laboured....

- The Baudelaires standing up after finding the answer....before just collapsing on the ground.....

- The Baudelaires’ voices becoming more and more raspy and quiet, the coughs becoming louder, as they just lay on the floor, saying “this isn’t it, this isn’t it”...but physically incapable of getting up, only able to turn themselves so they’re facing upwards, their breathing becoming slower and slower and slower.......

- Right before Inky comes in and produces an apple. Giving it to Sunny, who in turn gives it to Violet. Violet’s hands are trembling and she can barely bring it to her mouth. She turns to give it to Klaus. Klaus is already almost unconscious, his eyes are closed and he’s barely breathing. Barely moving. Violet presses the apple to his mouth. Klaus manages to bite, gripping Violet’s hand desperately in the process, but barely having the strength to.

- They all sit up. Alive and well. There are tears in their eyes as the laugh and hug each other. All alive. All breathing.

- Netflix pulled off that scene so well. I was literally sobbing my eyes out at that point. I’m still crying just thinking about it. That scene held so much raw emotion that my eyes burned. I was SO EXTREMELY NERVOUS that Netflix would ruin it. But they didn’t. They did everything right. THANK YOU SO MUCH NETFLIX!!!!!!!

- Heh uh....sorry for getting so dramatic there....I just have a lot of feelings.....

- KIT REFUSING TO TAKE THE APPLE NOOOOOO

- I knew it was coming. In fact, I was hoping it would happen, because it adds that extra layer of emotion. But my heart still stopped and I felt a strong feeling I cannot describe when I saw Olaf’s bleeding torso with a harpoon sticking out.

- Olaf’s tone change when Kit is mentioned though.

- That scene with Olaf carrying Kit through the water was so dramatic I’m love

- Olaf and Kit kissing and then Sunny immediately going “Yuck” added about, I’d say 7, maybe 8, years to my lifespan. Sunny, you queen.

- Olaf and Kit talking to each other. Reciting poetry. Laying on the beach side by side. Both of them gasping for air. I don’t know how to describe how I felt, it was an ethereal experience. It was not joy, though.

- Olaf’s death. His death shouldn’t make me sad. It shouldn’t make me cry. I feel no mercy for him. But still. It always makes me cry. It never fails. And the show made me cry too. Thank you Netflix, for confusing me emotionally (which is what the book did too so thank you for keeping that)

- Kit’s message before her death had me sobbing. There’s so much emotion in that scene. As Kit doubles over coughing. As Klaus holds on to Bea. As all 3 children are crying. And the cherry on frickin top is when Kit falls still, and the shot cuts to a silhouette of them as Violet cries out “Kit? Kit?!?”, her voice becoming increasingly distressed. So much raw emotion....they really pulled it off.....

- Now, onto a different note: BEATRICE’S FIRST BIRTHDAY, YAAAAAAAAY!!!!!!!!!!!

- I WAS SO HAPPY SEEING THE BAUDELAIRES ACTUALLY BE A HAPPY FAMILY AAAAAAAAAA MY HEART WAS ACTUALLY LEAPING AND MY CHEEKS WERE (AND STILL ARE) WARM!!!!!!!

- Also we finally got to see Bertrand!!!

- The Baudelaires sailing off at the end on the Beatrice, all of them smiling and sitting close together like a family. Netflix really just went and made my whole month, didn’t they???

- FERNALD AND FIONA!!!!!!!!!! AND THEY MEET UP WITH WIDDERSHINS AGAIN!!!!!! AND THEY’RE EATING CHEF’S SALAD!!!!!!! AAAAAAAA I’M LOVE THEM!!!!!!!!!!

- Olaf’s past associates being all successful as actors really made my heart swell dang...

- And they were all REALLY rocking those outfits!!

- Just like how Inky came and rocked that outrigger, am I right? ;)))

- Ok, I’ll actually stop now...

- Lemony’s face when he realized the note was from Beatrice aaaaaaaaa!!!

- LEMONY AND BEA!!!!! LEMONY AND BEA!!!!!!!!!! THEY’RE SITTING IN THE TEA PLACE AND HAVNG A NICE OL CHAT I’M SO HAPPYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ANYWAYS, I suppose that wraps up all of my reviews!! I can’t believe it’s.....over........no that can’t be right. I REFUSE TO BELIEVE IT’S RIGHT!!!!!! Anywayyyyyyyyy, I’M SO HAPPY WITH HOW THIS TURNED OUT!!!!!! I was SO scared they were gonna ruin it, but they DIDN’T!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Sure, I would’ve liked to see some things different, like I really wanted to see some flashbacks with the Baudelaires and Beatrice and/or Bertrand while they were still alive, but this is still AMAZING!!!!!! This has been the most emotional season yet!!! THANK YOU SO MUCH NETFLIX!!!! I literally cannot convey the amount of emotion and love pouring out of my system right now, so take this screaming and rambling to answer that! Anyways, as always, thank you for reading, and I hope you all have a good day/night!!!! <333

(I feel so empty now......)

[vldadvice]

ahahahhaa I'm so anxious right now and school is slowly ruining my life and I feel awful because everyone else is able to do school okay and I just,,, can't ?? like idk but I'm a lot weaker than everyone else and can barely finish my math homework without having a panic attack? and I don't even have a diagnosis for anxiety or depression and that means I can't be in the counseling office or miss school when I need to and I just aaaaaaaaaa (1/?)

and like I missed lots of school last week and now I have three packets for AP psych, a study guide for physics, a blog post and research to do for AP seminar, an entire book to read for English along with some notes, six days worth of math homework and two study guides for IB Math studies and a scene to memorize for acting and I’m slowly freaking out about it and I can’t do anything and it just sucks and idk what to do I just kinda wanna read klance fanfic (2/2)

i totally get you. last year i really really suffered in school and i felt as though i had no control over myself and had absolutely zero motivation. i know this may sound dumb but i promise you it absolutely saved my education: get a tutor. even though you may not need help in the subjects having a tutor means youll have someone with you to get through the work and the actually get things done. tutors help you with time management and i cannot tell you how much having one makes school easier. i really hope this helps!

[thedragonlover]

4. "i'm too sober for this" and 11. Dear diary wish you the best day!!! 🌻❤

aaaaaAAAAA THANK YOU

Evidence I can be a dumb: I reblogged that and didn’t even think about the fact that replying to asks about this would mean I’d have to post my writing on tumblr… is it weird that I got a little nervous? Considering I normally just write what I feel like and have uploaded lots of my work elsewhere.ahaha ignore meeee

I’ll write for MM because, hell, it’s cute and I feel like cute today okay not at all because you’re a MM blog and wanted a good chance you’d like reading what I wrote

just beware because I swear bunches and am writing this for giggles, and also I’ve never written for this fandom be gentle

4. “I’m too sober for this.”(Where MC isn’t paired with anyone, but you’ve still had the party and finally met the RFA face-to-face. Trying to avoid spoilers for anyone who hasn’t completed particular routes.)

.

It was a small get-together - just you and the RFA members meeting up for a nice celebratory dinner. It was a shame that V couldn’t make it, but he was grateful for the invitation. You were so relieved to have helped make the party a success, although you didn’t want to take a lot of credit. Everyone chipped in and put in so much hard work that, really, it made you proud to be a member of such a wonderful, kind of dysfunctional family.

Then you all sat down.

Zen got pretty defensive when Jumin commented on this “commoner establishment.”

This was a place that you had picked out, have some respect; don’t worry that it doesn’t meet his ridiculous standards, he’s just a stupid trust fund kid; babe, he’s calling me shallow, I’m too handsome to be anything like that materialistic bastard!

At this point, you were waiting for them to start pulling on each other’s pigtails to fuel all of the fanfiction people were writing about them. You very pointedly suggested seats that put them far enough to avoid physical violence. “No glaring at the dinner table.” They still continued to provoke each other, but at that point you’re glad they’re not making a scene.

No, you wouldn’t let Yoosung play a handheld at the table. Mostly because you forgot yours and wanted him to suffer with you. You said that talking with everyone can be fun too.

“Well… playing video games with everyone would be even better!”

For the love of…

“Especially when I wreck you,” Seven snickered, poking Yoosung’s face.

Of course he took the bait. “What?! No way, I’ll totally own you! Name the game and the time!”

“Mario Kart, an hour before your curfew, you cute widdle baby~” You hadn’t realized a person could literally talk in tildes, and then there was Seven.

“You’re barely older than me!”

Oops, maybe Jumin and Zen weren’t the only ones who needed to be separated.

You told them you’d wreck them both decided to be the adult here.

But, that’s right! Jaehee was here! This woman was a godsend, able to wrangle the most intimidating of business reports into submission! And she knew judo? Hell yeah! You could count on everything remaining under control with this badass at the helm!

…she looked so exhausted though. That’s right, it had taken a lot of convincing (both for her and Jumin) to escape paperwork hell. And you were going to enlist her help in babysitting all of these dorks? Oh, you couldn’t do that to this poor soul. Mama Jaehee needed a night off too.

“I don’t understand why we are eating here. I have chefs at home who would cook whatever dish you desired.”

“I swear, every time you open your mouth, I have to ask myself whether going to jail is worth it! It gets harder each time!”

“Ohoho, that’s what she said~”

“Seven, come on, that one’s not even clever…”

“Clever girl~”

“Don’t.”

Jumin was describing the fancier, more expensive lunch he had earlier that day with Elizabeth the 3rd. Zen was trying to ignore him, caught a waitress’ eye across the restaurant, and nearly made her run into a doorframe with a smile-wink-combo. Yoosung was “sneakily” playing his game under the table, and you let him because he promised to give you a turn. You didn’t notice Seven had stolen everyone’s napkins to make origami cats until his army was being sent to capture the entire table.

When your order was finally taken you asked if someone would drive you home later, and after being offered cars and a rocketship and even a piggyback ride, it’s Jaehee that inquired, “But, why do you ask?”

“I’m too sober for this.”

“Ah,” she responded. Then she added a drink to her order too. “Same,” she thought.

Zen is all for this development! “Well, you can count me in, babe. I just hope you don’t get too handsy with me, or I won’t be able to contain the beast…” Cue more winking.

Deadpan, Jumin responded, “Are you rabid? A beast that presents a safety hazard to society should be put down.”

“Wahh,” Yoosung cut in, “can we please not talk about putting down animals?!”

“Yeah!” Seven stood up. “Don’t! Talk about! Sad things! Around! The baby!” And he clapped for each pause, this man was a living breathing meme and there was no stopping him. So much for not making a scene.

As Yoosung argued about not being a baby, Jaehee accepted the wine glass handed her and downed it in one go. Zen was impressed. And he wasn’t going to be outdone, but then he started choking.

“Children,” she muttered.

“Yeah,” you agreed, an exasperated smile growing. “But they’re all my children, so.”

What a wonderful, dysfunctional family you had.

When Seven tried to ruin the moment with Bee movie quotes, you told them all, “But if you guys don’t cut the shit out, I swear to god I’m going to hang out with that Unknown guy because at least he seems to have some chill.”

“What the fuck,” Unknown blurted out, hiding in a nearby ficus.

11. “Dear Diary, …”

.

The moment you heard Seven start cackling, you knew you were going to regret inviting him over.

Regret turned to horror when he began, voice loud and singsong, “ ‘Dear Diary, today I actually cleaned up the apartment!’ ”

He was standing in your living room, on your sofa, with his shoes on, reading out of your personal diary, and you didn’t even care if you didn’t get away with his murder.

“ ‘But! Hold your applause! Because I also… put on people clothes! And I look pretty damn fine, if I do say so myself–’ ”

You lunged. He leapt over the back, whooping with glee. The chase was on!

Once you managed to convince him to skirt around the couch, you tried to leap over it just as dramatically, and faceplanted - thankfully on the cushions, but still, that hurt your dignity. And then he was sitting on your back, effectively preventing you from getting up and clobbering him.

“Seven! Get off!”

“ 'I hope you’re not a police officer, Diary, because I’ve got Fine written all over me!’ Aww, there’s even a little winkie face! Ooh, is that a list of pick-up lines I see? Were you waiting to use these on little ol’ me?”

“Seven, I mean it–”

“ 'You must be Jamaican, because Jamaican me crazy.’ Ooh, that one’s old but gold.”

“SEVEN, I’M GOING TO KILL YOU–”

“ 'Are you religious? Because you’re the answer to all my prayers.’ Ah, I’m swooning! Take me, MC, I’m yours!”

With a full-body heave, you launched the man off of you and into the coffee table. It broke. Thankfully, you wouldn’t have to worry about paying V back for breaking it if you were locked away for second-degree murder.

“They’re pick-up lines, not throw-down lines–ouch!”

“Give it back!”

“Ahh, don’t hurt me, master! OW okay that one really hurt.”

“Then stop being a brat and let go–”

“And lose this comedic gold? God Seven will never let this go! I must spread this gospel!”

“AGH I’M NOT YOOSUNG OKAY I WILL END YOU!”

Some time later, after you’d reclaimed your property and handled the irritated police officer called out from noise complaints, Seven came out of your kitchen to find you still pouting on the sofa.

“I hate you,” you moaned.

“Your complaint has been filed and sent to God Seven, and–” He lifted his arms to form an “x” in front of him, declaring, “Hate denied! You must forgive him and smile!”

“Not a chance.”

“Come onnnn…”

“Go away.”

He brought a hand to his chin, as if contemplating a serious matter. Eventually, he nodded several times to himself, then made a pose he had literally ripped from the anime you two were watching earlier.

“Then you leave me no choice! I will have to use… my secret weapon!”

You arched an eyebrow.

Grinning, he sang, “You can come with me to see Elly~”

“…are you suggesting I join you in hacking through Jumin’s security, sneaking past all of his bodyguards, and breaking into his home, to pet his cat?”

“Someone sounds interested…”

You stared.

Hard.

“…dammit Seven, why do you know me so well?”

You threw a pillow at him when he mimicked Karin’s pose and laugh from Street Fighter V.

Kind of like how Jumin threw the two of you out that evening. He was seriously considering the restraining order this time.

These got so out of hand so fast ahaha. Hope they’re mildly entertaining?