#911ls fanfiction

[eclectic-sassycoweyes]

Mr. Perfect, Book and Cover

- a Tarlos Library Meet Cute and a graduation gift for @emsprovisions 🥳 - pairs with this completely amazing art by @whatsintheboxmh

Eeeemmmm!!!! You did it!!! You’re freee!!! I’m so freakishly proud and over the moon for you my friend💗💗 and I’m very excited to hear what the other side is like!! (just please spare me some details until I’m done with exams in February please).

You making it to the other side, making it through every single annoying assignment, ending your days of always feeling a little bit bad for doing something you enjoy because you could be doing homework instead - all that needs to be celebrated to the fullers!!🎊 (Also you need to be celebrated because you are a kind, lovely, sexy, sweet christmas loving button who sneaks around keeping secrets and then sprinkles holiday joy on one lucky person a day after the other for this whole month.)

Without further ado, have some Tarlos Library Meet Cute for you on your last day of classes!💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖

Placing the novel on top of his already tall stack of cook books, Carlos turns slowly, carefully balancing them in his arms, with a plan to head to the counter. Only as he turns he comes face to face with a sight that he is by now, too embarrassingly familiar with.

For a moment he’s too stunned to realize what or rather who the sight implies, too stunned in fact to do anything but stare transfixed on two beautifully rounded globes perfectly accentuated by snug jeans, loose fitted just enough that they don’t reel anything in either.

He’s too busy wondering what it would be like to place his hands right there, thumbs pressing in just above, resting on the top of the plump cheeks, fingers gripping around soft hips; Imagining the feeling under his hands of the pink sweater that’s rucked up as if purposefully making the most magnificent ass Carlos has ever laid his eyes on pop out even more as if that’s even necessary..

He is abruptly pulled out of his daydreaming by a cheerful “Hey Carlos!” coming from somewhere above him. And then several unfortunate events transpire almost at once.

All the blood in his body changes the slow but steady downwards direction it was going in to rush up to his face, his cheeks flushing as he practically tears his gaze from the gorgeous butt, up, up, up, until it lands on the somehow even more devastating sight that is TK’s face beaming down at him.

In a voice sounding like he just travelled 15 years back in time and hit puberty all over again, Carlos yelps out a “TK!” Gathering himself and trying not to think TK probably having just caught him staring at his ass, he clears his throat to make himself sound more like his actual age and then continues to make a fool of himself “I didn’t think you were working today!”

He doesn’t phrase it as a question, rather he almost sounds accusing, and now he’s just gone and revealed that he has memorized TK’s work schedule maybe a little too well. He can feel a small bead of sweat forming on his temple and he feels stuffy in his jacket suddenly.

The worst thing is that while all this has been happening, he’s been desperately and probably very unsubtly trying to restack his books, trying and failing to look casual about it, in an attempt to hide the book he had just placed on top, the hunky, bare chested man in a cardigan and hot-librarian glasses on the cover bearing an obvious and uncanny resemblance to the man currently smiling down at him from the ladder he’s perched on.

The attempts at concealment results in several of the books catapulting dramatically out of his hands, Mr. Perfect, Book and Cover landing on the floor face up and right at TK’s feet.

Within the span of two minutes Carlos has regressed back to his teenage self, his cheeks flushed, voice rising and falling in uncontrollable pitches, and beginning to smell faintly of the type of sweat that comes from your nerves and hormones constantly being in overdrive; he has been uncharacteristically impolite, and on top of it all has managed to reveal not only that he’s memorized TK’s work schedule but also that he likes to read cheesy romance novels about hot librarians - all in front of his crush, who happens to be a librarian.

His crush, who is still smiling down at him, although now also starting to look a little puzzled and slightly concerned as he descends the ladder slowly as if worried that any sudden movements will spook Carlos further. Carlos kind of wants to hit himself on top of his head with a hammer repeatedly.

TK is bending down to pick the books up and, rising, he places them back in Carlos’ arms where the ones that didn’t escape are still stacked. It makes Carlos feel like he’s in some cheesy romantic high school comedy.

Mr. Perfect, Book and Cover is still lying face-up on the floor, and Carlos doesn’t act fast enough to prevent disaster. Before he manages to do anything to stop it, TK is bent down again, picking it up for him while Carlos stands there paralyzed watching it happen in slow motion.

All Carlos can hope for at this point is that TK won’t know that it’s a gay cheesy romance novel and he can pretend he’s just picking it up for his sister or something, but as TK picks up the book recognition shines in his eyes and Carlos cringes internally.

“Oh this is a cute one!” He says, smiling brightly as he hands Carlos the book. “Although the cover is a little cliché,” he laughs and Carlos is so dead. He’s never coming back to this library. It’s too bad though he really liked it. He hasn’t experienced a library having both such a good cook book section and an lgbt+ section that updates its selection of cheesy romance novels every month.

“I picked that out myself actually,” TK talks on but Carlos can barely hear him above the ringing in his ears. He vaguely registers TK say something about the librarian theme being his own little inside joke, and oh god, TK must be aware of how much that guy on the cover looks like him. Carlos has never felt so mortified. And okay, maybe he’s being a tad overdramatic but Carlos has also never experienced a crush like the one he has on TK, and he’s usually pretty good at keeping himself out of embarrassing situations.

“Carlos? Are you okay?” Carlos is once again brought out of a spiral, this time of another kind, by TK’s voice, this time laden with the same concern that colors his face. “Do you need to sit down?” Now TK’s is reaching out a tentative hand towards him and Carlos needs to answer before he has an even more embarrassing reaction to TK actually touching him.

“I’m fine!” He squeaks and seriously what’s up with the puberty part two he’s apparently going through right now? He’s 29 not 15 goddammit! The universe must hate him. TK is understandably not looking very convinced.

“Are you sure? It is pretty hot I’m here and you are wearing a lot of clothes.”

Carlos has to hold himself back from making the situation worse by laughing hysterically at the non-innuendo that only serves his earlier thought about being stuck in some bad romantic comedy. Or maybe more like a bad porn. Maybe removing Mr. Perfect, Book and Cover from the shelf opened up a portal that sucked Carlos in without him knowing and now he’s stuck in the story being badly flirted with by Mr. Perfect himself. He’s realizing his thoughts are a clear sign that he definitely isn’t done spiraling.

He gathers all his self control and manages a completely sane sounding “really, I’m fine,“ and even pairs it with a very normal-looking smile.

“Alright,” TK says slowly, retracting his hand to Carlos’ immense relief. “If you’re sure,” he adds, the concern dissipating hesitantly from his eyes.

Carlos realizes that now is the time to engage in polite small talk to prove to TK that he is really both physically and mentally okay, but there is something naggingly floating around just outside his head and out of reach, something his brain can’t put together. If TK recognizes the book.. if he picked it out..

He can’t finish the thought before he’s interrupted for the third time by TK, who is now the one looking sheepish for some reason, a lovely pink blush adorning his cheeks to go with the green of his eyes. One more thing that Carlos has become familiar with to an embarrassing degree considering how few times he’s actually seen them.

“So,” TK begins, looking briefly down and biting his lip, “I’m actually glad I ran into you. I was um-,” and now it’s TK’s turn to clear his throat before he continues: “Well I was wondering if uh- if- whether you were doing anything this Saturday?” He finishes, blinking back up at Carlos and smiling cutely, eyes sparkling, and looking, for the first time since Carlos met him, a tiny bit insecure.

[melancholyghoul]

Have a snippet of chpt.2 of my 4alarmfire fic (this one on ao3) :]

[This portion is just Mature, TK and Carlos decide to get to know Buck better over facetime - Eddie's not involved ... yet]

'What do you want to know, boys?' He rubbed his hands together and leaned against the seat behind him, finally taking the time to see the men he was talking to. They also had TK's phone propped up somewhere to view them on the couch, TK was clutched between his boyfriend's thighs, Carlos' strong arms wrapped around his naked waist, snaking underneath the blanket that covered over one of his shoulders, his head rested on the other. The angle didn't show everything, but he was almost certain TK was only wearing boxers. He went dizzy at the thought, if anyone else saw what was on his phone right now they'd think they were intruding on an intimate moment. Buck thought that himself, but this was deliberate. Buck was supposed to see this.

[otter-love-asl]

9-1-1: Lone Star Fics Master List

Multi-Chapter Fics

Home For the Holidays | Complete

TBA | Prepping

One-Shots

A House Divided

[donovankinard]

hey besties! i talked about starting to do monthly recs, and i've decided to go through with that - in both the 911 and 1d fandoms! so here goes nothing, i guess... i based the formatting of these posts off of a few mutuals who do regular fic rec posts <3 much love to them. i read a lot of 911 fic this month! way more than i have in the past, so here goes nothing. this month we've got tevan, buddie, riaz, and a sprinkle of gen christopher!

🔥 Tricks and Treats (but mostly Treats) || @ninjatrashpanda evan buckley/tommy kinard || 3k While taking Jee-Yun trick or treating, Buck and Tommy are mistaken for being her parents. It causes them to have a conversation they’ve been putting off for a while.

🔥 Almost Cost It All || @sunnywithachanceofbi eddie diaz/josh russo || 3.7k Josh & Eddie run into one another a month after breaking up and hash it out. Jeddie Week Days 3/4: Double Dates & Missing You

🔥 Carry You Home (Alex Warren) || emaisnialleraf evan buckley/tommy kinard || 2.2k “Do you ever think about the future?”

🔥 through the good, the bad, and the gross || @wikiangela evan buckley/tommy kinard || 1.7k Tommy assures his boyfriend that he doesn't look gross, even with the boils on his face.

🔥 you still love me anyway || @epiphainie evan buckley/tommy kinard || 43.5k But that was just him. Evan. He was too much, too smart, too impulsive, too earnest, and he was prickly, petty, bratty, unruly, redefining the phrase of high maintenance. He was Tommy’s favorite person. aka five times buck was being too much and one time tommy told him so

🔥 Made From Scratch || @inawickedlittletown evan buckley/tommy kinard & jee-yun han || 4k As soon as Maddie was gone, Buck turned to Jee-Yun. “Ready for some fun with your uncle Buck?” “Yes!” she cried out, smiling big. Buck grinned. “I thought you could help me out with something really important.” “Really?” She asked, head tilting to the left. “What?” “Well, we’re going to make a birthday cake.”

🔥 with you, i am home || @rosetterer evan buckley/tommy kinard || 3.6k The injured shoulder causes some issues during the night. Tommy takes care of it.

🔥 amber glow || @userautumn evan buckley/tommy kinard || 5.8k "I think I fucked up." “What did you do?” “I think I remember how Tommy Kinard knows me.” or; Buck is a down-on-his-luck photographer, and Tommy is the industry It-boy that just wants to help him out.

🔥 friendly neighbourhood firefighter || @sunnywithachanceofbi evan buckley/tommy kinard || 3.6k Tommy's adventurous Halloween role-play goes hilariously wrong when he gets himself stuck in a Spider-Man costume, only to end up with an injury. What was meant to be a playful, sexy surprise for Evan turns into an emergency rescue situation, with the 118 on the scene.

🔥 Pumpkins Scream In The Dead Of Night || Must_Love_Dogs evan buckley/tommy kinard || 2.3k Since Bobby and Athena's house is unavailable, Tommy offers his house for a Halloween Party. With a lot of help from Buck, and a bit from Maddie, and Chimney, they plan and decorate his house to perfection.

🔥 i'm haunted (by billy boils) || buckleymoons evan buckley/tommy kinard || 935w Tommy and the 217 hear two calls from dispatch during their shift. For some reason, both of these calls relate to one Evan Buckley. or: the 217 teasing Tommy for dating an idiot that carries corpses around

🔥 on purpose, i am going to care about you || @stardustvx evan buckley/tommy kinard || 2.1k Buck has a horrible migraine and Tommy takes care of him. Perhaps they also say I love you to each other for the first time.

🔥 The Favorite (Derogatory) || xanthippe74 evan buckley/tommy kinard || 1.3k After golfing with Gerrard, Buck just wants comforting over a few drinks with his friends. But all he gets is a hard time.

🔥 Family Dinner || @sugdenlovesdingle evan buckley/tommy kinard & the 118 || 817w The first 118 family dinner at Bobby and Athena's new house

🔥 Lay Waste To Your Beliefs || thespeckledbandicoot evan buckley/tommy kinard & the 118 || 3.1k Buck gets cursed on the job. Luckily, Chimney knows a guy. For the Bucktommy Winter Fest Halloween prompt: Magical Realism

🔥 Save A Horse... || Must_Love_Dogs evan buckley/tommy kinard || 1.7k What if Tommy had helped Buck decide which costume to wear for the "Firehouse Haunt Fest"? A season 8, episode 5 missing scene because I would have loved to see Tommy's reaction to Buck's cowboy costume.

🔥 maybe together we can get somewhere || @the-amber-raven evan buckley/tommy kinard, tommy kinard & daniel buckley || 62k Tommy has always been able to see ghosts. Usually, they stick around for a few days or weeks, maybe several months before they get what they need to move on. There was one ghost, however, who appeared when Tommy was young and seemed to be unable to get the closure he needed to let go and so he just… never left. He got used to it, after a while, and Daniel became a consistent companion throughout his life. Or, the one where Tommy can see ghosts and is haunted by Daniel Buckley for reasons it takes him almost thirty years to understand.

🔥 Where All This Love Comes From || @carlos-in-glasses carlos reyes/tk strand || 107k A single tear slips from Carlos' eye. Years ago, there was a young man in New York City called TK Strand and he had no idea that in Austin, Texas, a stranger called Carlos Reyes was aching, yearning, pining for exactly him. He had no idea how loved he was going to be by someone he had yet to meet. He had no idea how wonderful he was as a person with or without a partner – but he was about to find out. That's why you have to keep living, Carlos thinks, so you can find out.

🔥 a moment of clarity || acollectionofdaydreams evan buckley/tommy kinard || 2.1k The morning after breaking up with Evan, Tommy opens his door to find an Eddie who has something to say about it.

🔥 go ahead, rip my heart out || @atimeofyourlife evan buckley & eddie diaz, evan buckley/tommy kinard || 2.6k After 8x06, Buck crashes on Eddie's couch for the night. Eddie finds him the next morning presenting with cardiac symptoms on his couch.

🔥 Pause || iwroteafictoday evan buckley/tommy kinard || 3.2k Sometimes you just need to put a conversation on pause and talk it out with a friend. Post 8x06 fix it fic

🔥 If You Really Love Someone You Don't Let Them Go || @black-and-whitecrow evan buckley/tommy kinard & eddie diaz || 4.3k There are things worth fighting for. Like love. There are people worth fighting for. Like Evan Buckley. There are idiots needing some sense talked into them. Like Tommy Kinard. Luckily, there are also good friends who can make idiots see what's worth fighting for. Like Eddie Diaz.

🔥 i choose us every time || @spacewinter evan buckley/tommy kinard || 3k Of course, Buck is angry. He got his heart shattered by a man who thought he could tell Buck what he should feel. He's hurt, he's angry, and he's not ready to let it go. Hen's words resonate - he should fight for this relationship if he wants a future with Tommy, so that's exactly what he does. He drives over full of righteous anger and hurt, only to be faced with a ruined, heartbroken man that he still loves They talk instead, they hug. Apologies are made, anger is expressed. They make a decision to build something stronger together.

🔥 Closet Conversations || @eyesonstars-feetonground evan buckley/tommy kinard || 10.6k Six months is a long time to stick around if he thought you’d dump him. OR After his boyfriend dumps him, Evan Buckley goes on a date, makes a new friend, has some conversations, and realizes he's queer. Tommy haunts him every step of the way.

🔥 Hold Your Tongue || @guardiandelacour evan buckley/tommy kinard || 4.5k The Buckley parents decide to pay a visit to their reluctant children, and Tommy is finally forced to meet the people who made his boyfriend believe that he is worthless.

🔥 A House is Built with Walls and Beams || fairytalegonewrong evan buckley/tommy kinard || 2.1k Tommy is ready to take the next step in his relationship with Evan as they celebrate their anniversary. After much thought, he plans to ask Evan to move in with him, marking a significant moment in their relationship.

🔥 excellent chemistry || @judymarch15 sal deluca/eddie diaz || 3k Sal wants to be a fire captain someday, but to do that he'll need to go back to school and earn an associates degree in fire science. Eddie shows his support.

🔥 Just Let Me Adore You || @inawickedlittletown evan buckley/tommy kinard || 35.7k What if...instead of Chimney taking the role of interim Captain of the 118, Tommy is asked to take on the role. Or, what happens when Buck meets Tommy in S2

🔥 I'd Love To Hear 'Bout How You Been || Snaptic evan buckley/eddie diaz || 10.5k Did you say Evan Buckley?” Eddie has to confirm because there’s no way he heard that correctly. “Yes, sir…” The lady says, continuing on, but Eddie hears none of it, his brain still stuck on the name. Evan Buckley. He hasn’t heard that name in years. His thoughts become a grainy slideshow of memories, fragmented from the years; a wicked smile on a dirty face, broad shoulders covered in camo, curly hair blowing in the breeze, piercing blue eyes gleaming in the sunshine. Or: two old friends from the desert reunite in an LA hospital room

🔥 time is shortening (down to the bone) || @calinaannehart evan buckley/tommy kinard || 8.3k (WIP) “Hey, excuse me,” Buck says to the nurse behind the desk. “I’m not sure who I’m-" The words die in his throat as his eyes land on a familiar form in a large wingback chair, the leg rest raised so he’s reclined with his head tipped back and eyes closed. He’s thinner than he was when Buck last saw him, deep shadows sit under his eyes and his hair, patchy in places, has been shaved short. There’s a port-a-cath in his upper arm and hanging on the drip stand above is a bag of fluid, the bright red chemotherapy label visible even at this distance. “Sir?” The nurse says, but Buck can’t look away from the man. “Tommy.”

🔥 It's Freakin' Bats! || writerdot evan buckley/tommy kinard || 3.8k He startles awake with a gasp, sitting straight in bed. He’s scared and he doesn’t know why so he closes his eyes, breathes deep, and feels himself start to relax. Once the feeling fades, he looks at the time, and sees it’s just after 2AM. Grabbing his phone, he opens his text thread with Tommy and sends a heart. Or: it's Buck and Tommy's first Halloween together and Buck's not quite feeling himself.

🔥 Where It Wasn't Supposed To Be || @princessfbi evan buckley/tommy kinard || 45.7k They’d kept it under wraps to an almost paranoid degree. They didn’t touch in public, not even on their hikes up the countless trails that were never short of people minding their own business as they took in the good weather. They sat on opposite sides of the table at dinner. Evan came over to his place instead of taking the risk with his roommates. Evan had even come up with a cover story if they ever ran into anyone: he was picking Tommy’s brain about the job. Nothing more. Nothing less. What if Buck and Tommy met the three months before Tommy transferred to Harbor and Buck started at the 118?

🔥 The Last Drop Spilled Over || @lucid-ao3 evan buckley/eddie diaz || 28k Eddie is having conflicting feelings now that Buck is in a relationship with Tommy. Why does it feel like time is running out? And why does Drunk Eddie keep giving him so much trouble?

🔥 Habitual Damage || @eggmacguffin evan buckley/eddie diaz || 9.1k About a week after starting back at the 118, and about three weeks before he was supposed to start getting a steady check again, Buck quietly moved out of his loft— —and into his jeep.

🔥 Led Me Here To You || @andthenshesaid-write carlos reyes/tk strand || 28k TK knows his life is going to change when Gwyn and Enzo die, leaving him with custody of his six-year-old brother Jonah, but he isn’t prepared for the rigours of parenting, the questions it raises in himself, or for Jonah’s new teacher, Carlos Reyes.

🔥 old flames, new fires || @jamesandanthony evan buckley/tommy kinard || 3.1k The picture round arrives with the interval, and they're hunched around the sheet, arguing over a country outline that has them a little stumped when a figure approaches their table hesitantly. "Tom?" he says, and Tommy looks up in surprise. "Oh my god, Mateo?" he says, eyes wide as he stands to greet him. "Yeah," Mateo replies, grinning, and Tommy doesn't miss the way he looks him up and down appreciatively. "Man, how long has it been?"

🔥 The feeling came late (I'm still glad I met you) || paleredheadinascifi evan buckley/eddie diaz || 4.6k Come on, Buck. Let it out. I hate this, too. I hate leaving you. Tell me how much you hate it. Yell at me, Buck. Come on, yell at me,” he begs. Buck snaps. He pushes off the couch and crowds into Eddie’s space. “Is this what you wanted?” He spits, pushing hard enough against Eddie’s chest that he takes a step backwards. “Hmm? You want me to lose it on you?” Or, Eddie cannot handle Buck pretending to be fine about his move to Texas. He, in fact, refuses to let him.

🔥 got nothing on my mind (but the two of us) || @tommybuckleys evan buckley/tommy kinard || 5.1k “You’re covered in flour. Why are you covered in flour?” Buck sighs, letting his eyes follow Tommy’s path down his form — and wow, yeah, okay, it’s somehow even worse than the small glimpse he caught earlier. The apron he threw on has protected most of his clothes, but he can already see the flakes getting matted in the hair on his arms. Buck can only imagine the state of his face and hair. Maybe he should have prioritized that shower, after all. “I had a, uh — baking mishap,” Buck admits, still wrong-footed from Tommy’s sudden appearance. “I didn’t know you baked.”

🔥 our love is spook-tacular || @aesthetictarlos evan buckley/tommy kinard & mara & jee-yun || 2.1k "Uh, I made a list.” That's when Tommy notices his dangerous smirk and the clipboard on the table, together with a notebook and a few pens. This screams trouble, so much trouble. “A list about what?” He asks curiously, bracing for the practically endless range of possibilities. “Halloween couples costumes we could wear,” Buck says enthusiastically. Or, the one where Buck and Tommy go trick or treating with Mara and Jee.

🔥 Half Agony, Half Hope || @livinginsunnyhell evan buckley/eddie diaz || 52.6k He should’ve known this was going to be a moment when Christopher says, “Then why don’t you date? If dad’s gay… Why don’t you get together?” Buck does choke on his water this time. Sputters droplets all over the table and coughs loud enough to draw the attention of everyone around them. “Why – why do you ask that?” Buck wheezes and coughs again. Or Buck goes through the five stages of grief when Eddie comes out and considers dating men.

🔥 Your Name, Forever The Name On My Lips || @911varietyposts evan buckley/tommy kinard || 2.6k He was a widow at the age of 35. His husband had been ripped from his life in a cruel joke. OR: Evan adjusts to life without Tommy after a helicopter crash takes his life.

🔥 It's only after we've lost everything that we're free to do anything || @xjustlikeyou evan buckley/eddie diaz || 148k Chris leaves for Texas. Eddie tries to cope. Eddie fails. aka the Fight Club 2.0 fic

🔥 this love was once mine (please god, let it be us again || @xtarmanderx evan buckley/tommy kinard || 11.5k Buck's blue soulmark on his wrist is the thing that keeps him going after his breakup with Tommy. Somewhere out there, he may still have a soulmate who loves him. He holds onto that until the day his world is turned upside down and his mark turns black while he watches Tommy collapse to the ground.

🔥 Let the walls break down || @harmonic-intervention evan buckley/tommy kinard || 15.6k A whole month. That was how long Tommy could push his luck. bucktommy fix it, near-death experiences will force them to talk if nothing else will

🔥 never last (last) || Philipa_Moss (bsky) christopher diaz-centric || 15.2k Carla turned off the car and turned to him. “It’s just you and me,” she said. “What happened, baby?” Everyone said he’d been such a sweet kid. Every time he opened his mouth, he could hear himself pushing that kid farther away. “Nothing,” said Chris.

🔥 Darling, I Wanna Love You! || @rosyhoneydew evan buckley/tommy kinard || 2.4k “It’s no trouble at all,” Maddie jumps in. “Come on in, Tommy! You can just leave your shoes by the door there.” Buck turns his head slowly to give his sister a look that hopefully conveys the gravity of her duplicity, but she merely widens her eyes and tilts her head toward him in a motion that says get over it! He’ll do no such thing.

🔥 Bad Beer and Naked Rodents || @dashing-disaster evan buckley/tommy kinard || 1.6k "My point is, you got scared of commitment for three seconds and tell Evan Buckley, Evan Buckley, to go off to frolic on Grindr? I’m sorry, but do you know how stupid that is? Do you have any idea what happens to guys like Evan Buckley on Grindr?” Or: after the break-up Tommy's friends are there for moral support and a much-needed reality check.

🔥 The Weight Of The Past || @acrownofstardustandbone evan buckley/tommy kinard || 1.6k Sometimes the weight of the past is just too much to carry alone--and now, Tommy has Evan to help him shoulder this burden.

🔥 I Don't Want To Be Like This || Snaptic evan buckley/tommy kinard || 2.6k “Tommy?” Evan asks him gently, evidently noticing something is wrong. Tommy sighs, wondering if he’s really about to do this. If he’s really going to sit there and give Evan the ammunition to walk away from one of the best things that’s ever happened to Tommy. OR: Buck finds acceptance in his partner. Tommy shares his own secrets.

STATS: # of fics: 49 # of authors: 45 # of words read: 1,170,000~

[morganaspendragonss]

he's the air i would kill to breathe

Of all the times TK has faced death before, never has he been so sure, so aware, that he is going to die. Even on the plane, there was a chance, but here, trapped in this room, there is no such luxury. No chance, no backup, no hope. ao3 | 1.2k | 5.03 spec

They’ve blocked the door with their turnouts as best they can, but it’s a temporary measure at best. Somewhere in this building, the gas is snaking its way towards them; they’ve shut themselves in the further corner possible, both in this room and in the school, but there’s no denying that it will find them and kill them.

And it will kill them.

Of all the times TK has faced death before, never has he been so sure, so aware, that he is going to die. Even on the plane, there was a chance, but here, trapped in this room, there is no such luxury. No chance, no backup, no hope.

It suddenly hits him, the enormity of it all. The fact that, in less than an hour, he’ll be a corpse just waiting to be found, and grief erupts in his chest, so fast that it almost knocks him back. And it’s not just grief for himself, but grief for his family, his friends. Carlos.

Above all, Carlos, who will have to endure losing his father and husband in less than a year.

He’ll never get to share another moment with him. There’ll never be another kiss, another embrace, another shared smile or a laugh. They’ll never get to celebrate their first anniversary, or any after that, or even just another night together. TK will die before any of that, and it’s not fair how it has to happen now, when he has so much in his life that he loves, instead of years ago when he didn’t care.

It’s not fucking fair.

Brushing away angry tears, TK looks to his left, and it’s something of a comfort to know that this time he won’t have to die alone. Tommy holds her radio close to her lips, murmuring to Wyatt as if anything louder will give away their location to the gas. Nancy is furiously stabbing at her phone, shaking fingers typing out what TK assumes are messages to her parents and sister and Mateo. Hopefully they’re all safe, far away from what’s happening in this room.

Almost imperceptibly, the room darkens a shade. The change is so slight that TK wants to believe he imagined it, but one look at Tommy and Nancy proves him wrong. They may not be able to see the gas yet, but none of them are under any delusion that they’re not running out of time.

His phone is out of his pocket before he even thinks about it, fingers automatically navigating to Carlos’s name. As the dial tone rings, a part of TK hopes it will go to voicemail. In the little time he has left, he wants to remember his husband smiling and happy, just like he was this morning when he brought them doughnuts on what they all thought was just another day.

The rest of TK, though, the more insistent part that lives in the left side of his chest, doesn’t want to die without talking to his husband one last time.

“TK, where are you?”

He doesn’t know whether to laugh or cry in relief, the sound that comes out ending up as a mixture of the two. “Hey,” he gasps. “Hi, baby, hi. Are you okay?”

“I’m at the office, we’re on lockdown because of the gas.” Carlos hurries through the explanation, urgent in a way TK doesn’t quite understand until he speaks again. “I saw the 126 on the news, I know you were working on the derailed train. Just… Please tell me you’re safe.”

The lie sits on the tip of TK’s tongue, but it refuses to be spoken. He struggles with it for a while, too long, and he can see them now, the tendrils of gas fogging up the window, and he’s going to die.

“TK,” Carlos calls, his desperation clear. “Are you safe?”

He can’t do it. Not now. Not to Carlos.

“No.”

An anguished cry tears its way from Carlos’s throat and the strength of it threatens to break TK altogether. His eyes start to overflow with tears and he has to fight to keep his sobs as quiet as possible.

“Where are you?” Carlos asks again. “I’ll come find you, I swear I will. I’ll get you somewhere safe, TK, just tell me where you are.”

TK shakes his head and a sad smile plays at his lips. His husband is nothing if not predictable. “We’re in some school. It’s a kids’ classroom, a pretty cute one really. There are worse places to die.”

“Nobody’s dying, TK, just tell me where you are.”

“Baby, I can’t.” he sighs are wishes more than anything that he could hold Carlos as he says this next bit. “We’re surrounded by the gas, no one could get to us without exposing themselves too. There’s no way out of this one, baby.”

“No,” his voice cracks. “Don’t say things like that. You’re gonna be fine.”

Fuck, it aches. “I’m not, baby. And I’m so, so sorry. I love you, okay? I love you.”

“TK, you’re not–”

“Carlos,” TK interrupts, and he’s almost surprised when he does fall silent. He smiles even though Carlos can’t see him and closes his eyes, picturing him by his side. “Can you just… Please, can you just say it back.”

A beat of silence, and in that beat, TK knows that Carlos understands the reality of the situation.

“I love you too.”

Still smiling, TK tilts his head back until it hits the wall. “There it is.” He breathes out once, then, “I love you.”

It’s goodbye, loud and clear, and even as he drags the phone away from his ear TK can hear Carlos begging him not to put the phone down. He does anyway, even though it breaks his heart, and he ignores the buzzing as Carlos tries to call him back again and again and again. To have his husband’s voice be the last thing he hears would be a gift, but one that would come with a curse too; it would mean that Carlos would have to listen as they cough and choke and die, and TK knows he wouldn’t even think to hang up.

As the last thing he does, he would spare his husband that.

There’s a brief silence in the room before Nancy gasps and TK opens his eyes to find her pointing tremulously at the door. 

“Guys.”

They’ve run out of time.

Tommy brings the radio to her mouth once more. “That gas is coming into this room,” she reports clinically. Then, firmer, more emotional, “Tell your dad to take good care of my girls.”

Wyatt is silent for a moment. “I will,” he says eventually.

Tommy nods. “Good.” She looks between the two of them and extends a gloved hand to either side. TK wastes no time in taking it, squeezing tight as they all silently sit there, waiting second after excruciating second for the gas to close the final few metres separating them.

“Close your eyes,” Tommy says, and TK does.

He won’t look death in the face, not this time. He’ll look at his husband instead, and TK Strand will die with a smile on his face.

[nisbanisba]

Last night’s episode really bummed me out so here’s a little sickfic-let from my drafts

“Are you sure you want to come in?” Gwyn asks Carlos at the door of the Strand-Morgan residence in lieu of a greeting. “Owen and TK are both sick. And extremely whiny.”

“Not sick,” comes a raspy chorus from the living room.

“And I do not whine,” adds Owen. In a rather morose, elongated tone that is definitely not a whine.

“I’m gonna take my chances,” Carlos says with more confidence than he feels. “TK texted me that he’s totally fine but he just has an irresistible craving for matzo ball soup, so –” he holds up the bags from the deli he stopped at.

Gwyn gives him a smile that makes him feel more seen than he’s comfortable with. “Oh, you’re a good one. I like you.”

Carlos shuffles his feet. “Um. Thank you?”

“You can just drop that off with me, save yourself from the germ warfare,” Gwyn suggests.

He could, but TK’s texts had also pleaded for cuddles, and Carlos is a weak man when it comes to his still-fairly-new boyfriend.

“I’m gonna risk it,” he tells Gwyn, resolute.

“Don’t say I didn’t warn you.”

Inside, Carlos finds his boyfriend curled up on the uncomfortable couch under several blankets, wearing a familiar-looking hoodie.

“Hey, TK,” he smiles. “I’ve been looking everywhere for that sweatshirt.”

TK looks up at him blearily. “Sorry,” he rasps. “You can have it back if you want.” He makes a lethargic, uncoordinated attempt to tug himself free before Carlos stops him.

“I’m just joking. You look like you need it.”

“I’m not sick,” TK assures him. “I’m just really tired. And it’s cold in here. And my allergies are acting up.” He sniffles pathetically.

“January allergies, those are a huge issue here for sure,” Carlos says, nodding seriously.

“Really?”

Carlos laughs. “No. I don’t think so, anyway. But do you think a hug would help?”

TK nods eagerly, then coughs into his sleeve. “Even though I’m all gross? And my parents are here?”

Carlos is infatuated enough with this boy to truly not care about his current grossness. The presence of both Captain Strand and Gwyneth Morgan intimidates him a bit, but TK is listless and red-nosed and it’s honestly hurting Carlos a bit that he hasn’t hugged him yet. He’s addicted to the way he can make TK go relaxed and boneless in his arms, all tension released, at least for a moment. He wants TK to always feel this safe with him.

“I can handle it,” he whispers to TK, sliding onto the couch and wrapping him up in his arms. TK breathes a raspy sigh of contentment, then coughs into Carlos’s neck.

“Ew,” says Carlos, jerking back.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry!” TK ineffectually scrubs at the contaminated spot with the cuffs of his stolen hoodie.

Carlos shakes his head and draws TK close again. “It’s ok. I knew what I was signing up for when I came in.”

“You’re sweet,” TK tells him, leaning his head on Carlos’s shoulder and putting a hand on his chest, his fingers tracing patterns on Carlos’s sweater.

“I just wanted to see you,” Carlos whispers back. He can’t believe he gets to have this, this quiet domesticity with this beautiful, brilliant boy.

“Ugh, you shouldn’t look at me like this,” TK whines, turning his too-warm face into Carlos’s shirt. “I look like dog shit right now.”

“He brought your soup,” Gwyn calls from the kitchen.

TK leans back a little, his glazed eyes lighting up. “From the deli by your station?”

“As requested,” Carlos confirms. “Demanded might be a better term.”

“Don’t be mean.” TK pokes him in the chest. “I’m si–” He clamps his mouth shut quickly.

“What was that?” Carlos prods, grinning.

“Nothing.”

“No, no, it sounded like you might have a specific reason for wanting soup.”

“I’m homesick for New York?” TK suggests. He starts coughing again and grabs a tissue to hack into. He’s shivering hard when he stops.

“TK, you can say you’re sick,” Carlos says gently, pulling TK’s back to his chest and resting his chin on TK’s shoulder. He rubs TK’s chest through the stolen hoodie. “You’re really warm, babe.”

“I’m fine. You can keep doing that, though.”

Carlos rolls his eyes but slips his hand underneath TK’s layers to rub his sore muscles.

“I don’t think I can go out tonight. Not because I’m sick. I’m just super tired.”

“Quiet night in, then?”

“You would stay here with me?” TK cranes his neck and looks at him with red-rimmed eyes.

“Nowhere I’d rather be,” Carlos whispers back.

[equaniimiityy]

High Potential Intellectual

Chapters: 1/?

“Tyler Kennedy Strand?”

“It’s TK. And who’s asking?”

The detective looks unimpressed. If TK didn't feel so harried he might've otherwise enjoyed the man’s attention. He's certainly his type: tall, tousled curls, dark lashes, smooth skin and a fit physique. That much is evident even with his suit pants, shirt, tie and jacket obscuring the view. He raises a hand to pull the jacket in question aside, flashing the badge at his hip. “Detective Reyes with the LAPD. We have some questions for you. It’s time sensitive.”

Jonah pulls at TK’s hand insistently, a silent plea to be held. Usually, he’d give him a soft chastise and tease him that he is getting too big to be carried. But today he relents, seeking his brother’s comfort just as much as he seeks his. He perches him on his hip and raises a single eyebrow, “Ask away.”

Detective Reyes’ eyes flit over to where Paul hovers in his neighbouring doorway, ready to jump in and help if need be, then down to Jonah who has tucked his face into TK’s chest. “We need you to come down to the station with us.”

OR

The TV show High Potential rewritten with the cast of 9-1-1: Lone Star.

Read on ao3

[the-126-family]

New fic is posted!

Hi everyone! I have some exciting news. I finished the fic I wrote based off this post I made a while ago. I had so much fun writing it and I think it turned out really well! I hope you all enjoy it!

Please find the link here:

Carlos Reyes and The No Good, Horrible, Very Bad Day

Wishing everyone an amazing day! Please let me know if you enjoyed it!

[ccgrizzy]

WIP Wednesday - Another Sample

I added a graphic today. Tags below

Continuation from other WIP -

Gabriel leaned forward. "Carlos, your role in this is crucial. We need you to be out more and draw attention. Try to flush out the unsub. Williams is your back up in this. Unfortunately, there is a problem. TK. He can’t be with you. He fits the possible victim profile. I hate to ask this of you both. Especially after the townhouse fire. Can you get him to stay with Owen for a while while you are out or working? He shouldn’t be alone at your place.”

Carlos flushed red. He stared down at his hands. He hadn’t told his parents that he and TK broke up. He couldn’t lie to his father. “I’ll take care of it.” He mumbled. 

“I can call him, if necessary…” Gabriel offered

“No!” Carlos exclaimed. “I got it, Dad.” Carlos swallowed. He never raised his voice to his father. He should take a moment after the brief to tell his dad that he and TK broke up so that it wasn’t a problem. He should. He knew he wouldn’t though. 

“Okay, son. Tranquilo.” Gabriel acquiesced.” 

Williams looked between Carlos and Gabriel with this discussion and looked uncomfortable. “Should we discuss how we are going to flush out this particular unsub?” Williams asked, breaking the awkward silence. 

Hendricks cleared his throat. “I think Carlos should be seen out at clubs. I know that makes you uncomfortable, Carlos.” Hendricks nodded to his officer noting the flush staining Carlos’ neck. “And I’m sorry. I don’t think it can be avoided.”

Carlos spoke. “I understand, sir. Would it be possible to arrange for a fight at a club that I can pull my badge and break up? We can have the people fighting be a couple of undercover cops or Rangers.”

Williams broke in, “We could be there on a date and we could both break it up.”

Carlos looked up suddenly as Gabriel stopped him. “You’re supposed to be back-up, Ranger Williams.”

Williams held his hands up. “I know. But if we are both there, we stand a better chance of gaining the attention of the unsub and piquing his interest.”

“Carlos has a boyfriend,” Gabriel mentioned.”How will TK take this? I wouldn’t want to hurt him again.”

Carlos continued to look down at the file while he randomly flipped pages. “It's fine.” Something in the file catches his eye. “Huh? Do you have the Red Rock victim’s folder? Bradley, right?” 

Williams slid the folder over to Carlos and walked over to Carlos side and looked over his shoulder. Gabriel asked “What is it, son?”

Thanks for the interest so far: Anyone want to be tagged? I'm still relatively new at this. @rangersoup @alrightbuckaroo Open tags.

[literateowl]

Come Home to Me A 2x02 Carlos's POV fic

“Dispatch requesting additional engine and RA units to relieve station 126 at 4548 Green Street.”

The small amount of calm that Carlos managed to grab onto is gone as soon as he hears the station number over the radio.

No. This can't be happening. They definitely said ‘relieve’ right? Maybe they meant ‘assist’. Relieve means–

Carlos cuts himself off from thinking any further and closes his eyes, trying to keep his breathing steady.

Read the rest on AO3

[rosedavid]

lost in the static

“I’m coming with you,” TK snaps, leaving no room for argument as he glares at his father. This is Carlos they’re talking about, after all. TK would do anything for him.

He sucks in a deep breath, exhaling shakily. Then, softer and more desperately, “He’s my husband.”

...

A 4.18 canon divergence where TK goes with Owen to find Carlos

Carlos x TK | Rated T | 3K words

Tag list under the cut:

@wandering-night19 @danieljradcliffe @thisbuildinghasfeelings @illbeyourreasonwhy @jddryder @goodiecornbread

[eclectic-sassycoweyes]

Happy (Seven Sentence) Sunday !!! Thank you @heartstringsduet @ironheartwriter @nisbanisba for the tags! <3 <3

This is actually very close to seven sentences hehe, and is from a 5x05 coda that is unsurprisingly turning long and introspective and also suddenly containing an over the top amount of sea and boat metaphors over which I had no control. Here’s to manifesting that it’ll actually be finished at some point soon🤞🏻👀

His parents had been crashing waves of passion, and a sea of love so deep it felt impossible that they were suddenly stranded in the shallows, hitting rock bottom. At least for a seven year old mind who couldn't grasp all the details. At seven, to TK it had felt like waves that turned suddenly loud, dangerous, nauseating and then out of nowhere they stilted. Suddenly the way they looked at each other was so... eerily neutral, the same with their tones when they sat him down and explained that they were getting a divorce. None of the banter, or the over-the top PDA or even the fight was there anymore. And TK, at seven, felt like he was suddenly drifting along in his own little boat, watching it happen, wondering why the three of them weren’t together in the rolling waves of love and laughter that gave tummy aches.

(As always) OPEN TAG for anyone who wants to play,

And ✨No Pressure✨ tags under the cut:

(I have taken the liberty to add a few to the list who I know play or who I see around and who have interacted with my wip posts before - please lmk if you want to be removed or added to the list :) !!!)

@welcometololaland @firstprince-history-huh @lemonlyman-dotcom @lightningboltreader

@thisbuildinghasfeelings @never-blooms @carlos-in-glasses @pimento-playing-hopscotch

@cold-blooded-jelly-doughnut @paperstorm @heartstringsduet @herefortarlos

@carlos-tk @alrightbuckaroo @ladytessa74 @strandnreyes

@captain-gillian @goldenskykaysani @rmd-writes @your-catfish-friend

@nancys-braids @emsprovisions @thoughtsickles @nisbanisba

@ironheartwriter @corsage @whatsintheboxmh @goodways

@the-126-family @meditating-honey-badger @chicgeekgirl89 @theghostofashton

@freneticfloetry @liminalmemories21 @carlossreaders @literateowl

@dramalets @reyesstrand @lonestardust @lutavero

@tkslittlesway @loustyleshtommo @mrs-corrections-78 @sapphic--kiwi

@tellmegoodbye @decafdino

[melancholyghoul]

NEW FIC !!!

Finished the first chapter of that 4alarmfire fic I wanted to start, bit of a shorter one, but you gotta start somewhere !!

Summary below the cut \/

Chapters: 1/? Fandom: 9-1-1 (TV), 9-1-1: Lone Star (TV 2020) Rating: Explicit Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Relationships: Carlos Reyes/TK Strand, Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz/Carlos Reyes/TK Strand, Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV), Evan "Buck" Buckley/TK Strand, Evan "Buck" Buckley/Carlos Reyes/TK Strand Characters: TK Strand, Carlos Reyes (9-1-1 Lone Star), Evan "Buck" Buckley, Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV) Additional Tags: Polyamory, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Bottom TK Strand, Top Carlos Reyes (9-1-1 Lone Star), Hand Jobs, Dirty Talk, Sexual Fantasy, Blow Jobs, Crushes, Come Eating, Come Swallowing, Light Dom/sub, Sub TK Strand, Dom Carlos Reyes (9-1-1 Lone Star), Gentle Dom Carlos Reyes (9-1-1 Lone Star), Soft TK Strand, 4alarmfire, there's like a teeny bit of plot, but not really, Established Carlos Reyes/TK Strand, Pre-Relationship Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence Summary:

'That firefighter you met during the wildfires?' He asked, 'You sure do speak to him a lot, mi vida.'

'No I don't!' He scoffed light-heartedly, 'I speak to him a totally normal amount.'

Carlos smiled, 'Even if you did, you light up whenever you do. You get that twinkle in your eye, redness in your cheeks...' He looked at him with insistence, all he got in response was a confused look, 'you like him Tyler.'

TK sat up straight and swallowed a lump in his throat, is that what this was? The jokes and the late night conversations? Oh my God... they were flirting, 'I-I love you, Carlos.' He stated, Carlos just laughed.

'I didn't say you didn't.'

------------- or -------------

Buck, Carlos, Eddie and TK each figure out what [and who] really make them happy.

[snowviolettwhite]

Make Me Write

Tagged by the lovely @dangerpronebuddie

Rules: send me an emoji corresponding to the wip and I'll write three sentences per emoji. I'll share some of what I wrote.

🧸 Chapter 12 of little boy don't you cry, cause the child in you is still alive (early 2010s 911: Lone Star AU/ Owen Moves Tk To Texas At Fourteen)

🚒 don’t have to be sorry for leaving and growing up (early 2010s 911 Fire Academy AU/ 18/19 year olds Buck, Eddie, Shannon and Baby Chris In LA)

😭 Omega Tk Strand

🍭 Toddler Eddie Getting Lost & Meeting Young Adult Athena

😿 Autistic Son As Small Child / Autistic Parent Eddie

🛝Toddler Eddie & Big Sister Adrianna

😈 Number 5 Is Biological 13, Has The Maturity Of A 13 Year Old (The Umbrella Academy)

Tagging But No Pressure @anewkindofme @pimento-playing-hopscotch @missmagooglie @the-flaming-nightmare @aroeddiediaz @tommykinard6 @warpedpuppeteer @lochnesswriter @babygirl-diaz

[ver-subtitulos-de-series]

911 Lone Star Temporada 5 Capitulo 1 Episodio Completo en Español

[morganaspendragonss]

holding on to your final breath

for @911lonestarangstweek day 6 - make a moment of your choice (push wake up scene) as angsty as possible i considered not going so extreme with this one but goddammit it's angst week and i have been rotating this idea in my mind since push aired. also big shout out to emmerdale for recently having a character fall through an icy pond, get hypothermia, and...well. to add some extra angst, tarlos aren't broken up in this fic title from coffins by bohnes ao3 | 1.8k | mcd, hypothermia, seizures, hospitals

One moment he’s drifting off to sleep, one hand loosely in TK’s as the exhaustion of the day catches up with him.

The next, he’s wide awake as the monitors beep and doctors surge around them like a tidal wave pulling him away from the man he loves. TK’s body jerks and twitches, eyes rolled back so far that the lids are cracked open, displaying the whites as he seizes and seizes, and Carlos can’t move, can’t speak, can’t do anything to resist as he’s pushed closer and closer to the door.

“What’s happening?” he manages, to no response. His heart pounds and tears start to streak down his cheeks, heart breaking as he’s forced to face anew the fact that he might actually lose him this time. He resorts to begging, would fall down to his knees and clutch their coats if he could, if it would make TK live. “Is he– Please, please help him. Don’t let him die. Please.”

But they don’t heed his sobs, firmly pulling the door closed once he’s clear, and suddenly all the noise is sucked out of the room. Carlos stands in the vacuum of the waiting room, numbly watching through the glass, until he blinks and he’s in a plastic chair, Tommy on one side and Nancy on the other. Tommy has her head bowed in prayer and Nancy keeps throwing anxious glances in the direction of TK’s room, her foot tapping a jerky beat on the linoleum floor.

Carlos shifts, groaning as stiff muscles are forced back into action; he doesn’t know how long he’s been sitting here, but it must have been a while, as through the window the sky has turned black, snowflakes still visible in the glow of street lamps. His movement alerts Tommy and Nancy to his newly alert state, and they turn in unison to smile at him, gathering up his hands and squeezing them.

“What…” he starts, but trails off as he remembers the incessant beeping, the tremors ripping through TK’s body, the voices that all blurred into one long stream of bad news. His head whips around, desperately searching for signs of life behind those doors, and dreading what will happen if there isn’t.

And it’s like the universe knows he’s at his limit, because just then the door slides open and TK’s doctor looks around, smiling gently and heading over when she spots them.

“Is he okay?” he blurts out as soon as she’s within earshot. He doesn’t have it in him to be patient anymore, not when TK’s life is at stake.

“The good news is that we’ve managed to get him stabilised,” she said. 

Nancy rubs his shoulder in support, and Carlos allows himself a brief moment of relief that the worst hasn’t happened just yet. But he knows the other shoe is just waiting to drop, so he steels himself. “What’s the bad news?”

“Rewarming after hypothermia is a tricky process and it causes stress to the body, which is already vulnerable,” she explains. “His organs are struggling to function as they should, and his brain is more sensitive to electrical changes, which is what brought on the seizure. The next few hours are going to be critical.”

Carlos breathes out, more shaky that he’d like, and has to blink hard to stop more tears from falling. “Can we see him?”

“Of course.”

The doctor moves aside to let them pass, yet Carlos can’t help but hesitate. He doesn’t want to see TK like this, he never wants to see TK like this, but he can’t shake the idea that this time will be for real, and Carlos doesn’t know if he can face that. If he can face him, dying.

Someone steps in front of him and a hand lands on his cheek, tilting his head down until he meets Tommy’s eyes.

“Hey,” she says, soft and kind, but sad too. “Come on. Let’s go be there for him, okay?”

He nods, but it’s not until she takes his hand and pulls him gently along that he actually moves. Time blurs again until he’s lowering himself into the chair at TK’s bedside, automatically reaching out to run his fingers through his hair. The ventilator is gone now, replaced by some other device that Carlos can’t fathom, and he vaguely hears the doctor explaining how it was a choking hazard in the event of another seizure.

He tunes her out after a while, letting Tommy handle the details, and just focuses on TK. On the paleness of his skin and the bruise-like shadows under his eyes. On the way he lies, so still and so unlike TK that Carlos has the urge to rearrange him slightly, to make sure he’s comfortable, just the way TK likes to sleep. He doesn’t, of course, too wary of the machines and wires and TK’s general fragility to do more than raise his hand to be kissed, but it aches his heart to see him like this. It’s so unlike TK, who usually lies on his side, curled up with one arm reaching out for Carlos.

TK hates sleeping on his back.

The doctor leaves, eventually, and it’s just the three of them in the room. Carlos doesn’t take his eyes off TK; he won’t this time, not again. Not until he’s at home and safe and well again. Maybe not even then.

“I can’t lose him,” he mumbles, whether to himself or Tommy or Nancy, he doesn’t really know. “I can’t– I can’t.”

One of them grips his arm, the other reaching round to hug him from behind. “TK’s come this far,” Tommy says. “He’s still with us.”

“And one thing we know about TK,” Nancy adds. “He’s never backed down from a fight.”

Tommy hums, a slight amused note to it. “She’s right about that.”

Carlos sniffs and nods, but he’s suddenly stifled by the weight of their comfort. “I think–” he starts. Hesitates. “I think I’d like some time with him. Alone. If that’s okay?”

“Yeah, of course,” Nancy says, immediately withdrawing the hug. Tommy stands too, pausing halfway to kiss his cheek. It reminds him of his mother, and Carlos desperately wishes she were here, with all her constant faith in the good of things.

When he’s alone, he leans closer to the bed, taking his time to memorise everything of TK that he can see. “Hey,” he says. “Hey, TK. Um. I guess I want you to know that I’m here. We all are. Me and Nancy and Tommy. The others know, but they’re still on shift, and your dad… We’ve tried getting in touch with your mom and dad, but the storm’s knocked out signal. And they probably wouldn’t be able to get to Austin anyway, so… So I guess you’re just going to have to hold on for them.

“And for me. I’d really like it if you held on for me, too.” He pauses, breathes in shakily and blinks away the sudden blurriness to his vision. “I love you, TK. You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me. I don’t tell you that enough, but it’s true. And, I guess I was thinking, when you get out of here and you’re all better, maybe we could get started on making that – us – official. This isn’t a proposal, because you deserve so much better, but I want that with you, TK. I want everything with you. And, baby, life’s too short. So hurry up and come back to me, yeah?”

He kisses TK’s hand and bows his head, silently muttering prayers as he waits for TK to just open his eyes. To come back to him, like he’s done so many times before.

And then–

He doesn’t know how long it’s been, but–

A squeeze.

It’s weak, but it’s there, and Carlos shoots up straight, choking on a sob as he sees TK’s eyelids start to flutter, his blue-tinged lips part in a shaky inhale.

“TK?” he asks, not daring to believe it yet.

A breath, then another. “Carlos?”

“Hey.” He stands and bends over the bed, pressing his lips to TK’s temple and cradling his head in his hands. “Hey, sweetheart, it’s so good to see you.”

“Carlos?” TK repeats, his voice barely a whisper.

“Yeah, baby, I’m here. I’m not going anywhere.”

“The… In the water.”

“I know, you went under, but you’re safe now and you’re going to be okay, I promise.”

“I… Boy.”

Carlos’s heart breaks all over again; of course TK would be on death’s doorstep and still worried over someone else. “He’s okay. You saved his life, baby.”

TK’s gasps a few more times, painful whimpers leaving him as the slivers of his eyes dart unseeingly around the room. 

Then they lock onto Carlos’s, suddenly clear, and his breathing slows, becomes more peaceful. “I love you.”

.

..

…

It’s quiet, after. Carlos wishes he could say he doesn’t remember what happened in that room, but he does, every wrenching second of it. He remembers the nurses flooding the room, pushing him back but not pushing him out; he remembers them rolling in the crash cart and sticking pads to TK’s chest. He remembers the shocks, the way TK’s body had arched off the bed only to fall down again limply. 

He remembers the end.

The doctor, standing at the side of his bed; a nurse, holding fingers to TK’s neck, then shaking his head. A declaration – Time of death, 23:57 – calling quits on TK’s life just like that. TK, who had been awake and talking not five minutes prior, now gone forever.

He’d walked out of the room in a haze, looking up to see Tommy and Nancy on their feet, to Judd walking around the corner with Owen by his side. They all looked at him and no words needed to be said for them all to understand that it’s too late.

They let him back in the room eventually. The machines are gone; it’s just him and TK, no hope left. He ends up curled on his side next to him, forehead pressed to TK’s temple, arms wrapped around him, fingers carding through his hair.

It’s peaceful. It’s wrong.

The silence weighs on him, and Carlos holds TK all the tighter. One last time, he lets the love of his life chase away the monsters lurking in the shadows; one last time, he keeps him close, breathing in the smell of the man he thought he would grow old with.

He doesn’t know how he’s supposed to face it when he has to leave, that moment drawing ever closer with every breath he takes, with every breath TK doesn’t.

He’ll face it when it comes.

For now, TK needs him.