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pandulce135 · 1 year ago
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It really is like the titanic!
Where the rich get all the attention and care and the poor die.
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inkskinned · 1 year ago
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you were raised in comparison.
it wasn't always obvious (well. except for the times that it was), but you internalized it young. you had to eat what you didn't like, other people are going hungry, and you should be grateful. you had to suck it up and walk on the twisted ankle, it wasn't broken, you were just being a baby. you were never actually suffering, people obviously had it worse than you did.
you had a roof over your head - imagine! with the way you behaved, with how you talked back to your parents? you're lucky they didn't kick you out on your ass. they had friends who had to deal with that. hell, you have friends who had to deal with that. and how dare you imply your father isn't there for you - just because he doesn't ever actually talk to you and just because he's completely emotionally checked out of your life doesn't mean you're not fucking lucky. think about your cousins, who don't even get to speak to their dad. so what if yours has a mean streak; is aggressive and rude. at least you have a father to be rude to you.
you really think you're hurting? you were raised in a home! you had access to clean water! you never so much as came close to experiencing a real problem. sure, okay. you have this "mental illness" thing, but teenagers are always depressed, right. it's a phase, you'll move on with your life.
what do you mean you feel burnt out at work. what do you mean you mean you never "formed healthy coping mechanisms?" we raised you better than that. you were supposed to just shoulder through things. to hold yourself to high expectations. "burning out" is for people with real jobs and real stress. burnout is for people who have sick kids and people who have high-paying jobs and people who are actually experiencing something difficult. recently you almost cried because you couldn't find your fucking car keys. you just have lost your sense of gratitude, and honestly, we're kind of hurt. we tell you we love you, isn't that enough? if you want us to stick around, you need to be better about proving it. you need to shut up about how your mental health is ruined.
it could be worse! what if you were actually experiencing executive dysfunction. if you were really actually sick, would you even be able to look at things on the internet about it? you just spend too much time on webMD. you just like to freak yourself out and feel like you belong to something. you just like playing the victim. this is always how you have been - you've always been so fucking dramatic. you have no idea how good you have it - you're too fucking sensitive.
you were like, maybe too good of a kid. unwilling to make a real fuss. and the whole time - the little points, the little validations - they went unnoticed. it isn't that you were looking for love, specifically - more like you'd just wanted any one person to actually listen. that was all you'd really need. you just needed to be witnessed. it wasn't that you couldn't withstand the burden, but you did want to know that anyone was watching. these days, you are so accustomed to the idea of comparison - you don't even think you belong in your own communities. someone always fits better than you do. you're always the outlier. they made these places safe, and then you go in, and you are just not... quite the same way that would actually-fit.
you watch the little white ocean of your numbness lap at your ankles. the tide has been coming in for a while, you need to do something about it. what you want to do is take a nap. what you want to do is develop some kind of time machine - it's not like you want your life to stop, not completely, but it would really nice if you could just get everything to freeze, just for a little while, just until you're finished resting. but at least you're not the worst you've been. at least you have anything. you're so fucking lucky. do you have any concept of the amount of global suffering?
a little ant dies at the side of your kitchen sink. you look at its strange chitinous body and think - if you could just somehow convince yourself it is enough, it will finally be enough and you can be happy. no changes will have to be made. you just need to remember what you could lose. what is still precious to you.
you can't stop staring at the ant. you could be an ant instead of a person, that is how lucky you are. it's just - you didn't know the name of the ant, did you. it's just - ants spend their whole life working, and never complain. never pull the car over to weep.
it's just - when it died, it curled up into a tight little ball.
something kind of uncomfortable: you do that when you sleep.
#writeblr#warm up#my dad was actively doing bad shit to us and we STILL were told we were lucky . and to a point i do think im lucky#i just think also there's somethin to be said about like. how about we stop using comparison to dismiss ppls individual struggles#yes there are people who have no perspective. for the reference tho having perspective actually made me really unwilling to get help#for what was a serious and debilitating mental health issue. bc i thought i didnt DESERVE IT#and i would rather have 600 ppl who aren't THAT bad get help and get heard and get seen#than make any 1 kid. do the math that i did: look at the world that is dying and the people who are hurting and say#''oh. okay. others have it worse. they are probably better people than i am. i am being unreasonable. i cannot ask for help#i am not good. i am taking too much space. i am not worth saving.''#bc our WHOLE lives we are taught a scarcity mindset - that you can 'steal' from someone. so that instead of changing a system that doesn't#actually offer fair support to everyone#we put the impetus on the individual to just... demand less.#and here's something - there are probably ppl who think i DIDNT deserve to get help#bc i DID have it better than other people#and something about that is ... so sickening. bc i think all of us in some way at some point WILL need help.#we were supposed to make communities. we were supposed to offer our hands. we were supposed to raise the barn#instead we said: it could be worse. now handle it yourself
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actualalivecreature · 5 months ago
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this was a banger but no one is paying attention to it on threads so here u go
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kingofthering · 7 months ago
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endless list of random motogp things - fucking lovemaking in parc fermé
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jjnostredame · 1 month ago
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so please don't ever say that it should have been you
@loudclan-clangen
i've been feeling um. crazy? crazy. about them since moon 29 dropped. no one has suffered more than them. i'm on my hands and knees begging the clangen rng to be kind to them bc i cant take this anymore. i needed to draw these two grieving so bad... my survivors :(
loudclan's relationship to starclan is so vague, unstable, and strange and it breaks my heart to think about how seperated and far away they must feel from their family right now. i hope somewhere in the dark of the healers' den they'll find a way to ease each other's pain.
i've really been loving loudclan so far :') i ended up doing the initial sketch for this at work bc i couldnt stop thinking about them.
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chonideno · 1 year ago
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literally where can the zelda franchise go after totk. this is it. we've reached it. the pinnacle of video game entertainment. the whole dev team should just pack their stuff and enjoy a long and comfortable retirement. whoever decides their team has to follow-up on that with the next zelda game should answer for their crimes at the hague. what the fuck. I haven't even beat the game yet but what the fuck.
and how are AAA video game devs everywhere not losing their minds. how the hell did nintendo do any of that? and on that console?? you mean to tell me I can stack 15 differently shaped objects on top of each other and they don't vibrate violently into the skybox?? you mean to tell me the physics engine gladly accepts whatever I throw at it and holds it all together without dropping a frame while running on a machine that was outclassed two generations ago??? this is not witchcraft it's a grandiose demonstration of mastery over every aspect of game development that casts an immense shadow over every other AAA studio. fuck. fuck!!!!
everything about this game is crazy to me. the visuals are crazy. the soudtrack is crazy. the complexity of all systems and how they interact is crazy. the sheer amount of non-repeating content, NPCs, quests, dialogue, puzzles, environment variety - all crazy to me. every time I boot up this game I am humbled by the monumental effort and obvious love that went into every facet of the resulting experience. no cut corners anywhere. mirror-perfect chrome polish.
it's so rare we get something like that, in any field. I'd understand if nintendo never made a zelda game ever again because how do you follow that. god I hope everyone who worked on this game got the fattest check and the sloppiest head. I'm so happy I get to live in shigeru miyamoto's world
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zu-is-here · 10 months ago
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<– • –>
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nanodelta · 4 months ago
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reached over 500 followers on twitter! yippee!! here's the art i made for it!
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khawla-gfm2 · 2 months ago
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📰Khawla's Family Campaign Update: 50📰
$8,206/$20,000 as of October 3rd [10pm CDT]
Currently $794 away from $9,000 as a short term goal
The next immediate target is $10,000 as the halfway point.
Even donating just $5, $10, or $20 can go a long way to helping the funraiser reach it's goal! And even if you can't, spreading the campaign can help reach the people who can donate.
[for more information on the campaign: check my pinned post, the campaign page itself, or message me if you have any questions.]
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ziracona · 1 year ago
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How getting to DAI right after DAO -> DA2 felt.
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monamoe · 22 days ago
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For legal reasons these are a joke
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tenoart · 15 days ago
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Made this before my Poseidon design was finalized. Anyway! Water whip!
Yal really saw this man get brutally stabbed and ur reaction was 'i need him'
Blood warning under the line
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Sneak peak for yal that checked tehe
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tmgmrk · 9 months ago
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Artwork I made for a contest. You can vote for me by liking the post on insta until Feb 17. I would really appreciate your help! 🩵🤍
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avocadoraisin · 9 months ago
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multiple Hoffmen
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sydneyadmu · 1 year ago
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Mads Mikkelsen Breaks Down His Most Iconic Characters - Galen Erso
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sf-bl · 2 months ago
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Art-a-Day Day 16:
CCEO AU.
Just after getting Rhys out of Old Haven with his head tangled in a space station.
Taking the very best/worst decision. Jack inside Rhys, Rhys inside Helios. 200% as good as they imagined it'd feel to have the physical/digital pressed right up against their senses. Got a little exploratory. It's better when there's someone in there to feel it with you; don't think about why.
(Immediately followed by Rhys passing out in a cold desert covered in sand and regret.)
[Putting these here to bring the AU all into one tag: https://sf-bl.tumblr.com/tagged/cyber%20ceos mostly Rhack, totally out-of-sequence]
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