#500 goslings rules

[goosewriting]

500 subs prompt event! 🎉

gather round, my goslings, 'tis time 🦆🐤🐤🐤🐤🐤

under the cut you will find a prompt list, which i selected from here: writing prompt list by @make-me-imagine. it's pretty long, so take your time looking at them all lol as always, thank you so much for the support!<3

THE RULES:

PLEASE read my main rules which you'll find right here in my pinned post. while you're there, take a look at my masterlist to see what has already been requested, to avoid being too repetitive

only 1 turtle per request (Leo, Raph, Donnie or Mikey x reader)

these will drabbles, so around ~500 words each

only 1 or 2 requests per person!

remember: requests for these open on January 7th at 14:00 CET

Your request must include:

one turtle of choice

1 or 2 prompts from the list (as in the colour-coded numbers). please specify who is saying which!

specifics on the setting/situation you have in mind

Example of a request:

“purple 3 for Raph, pink 1 for reader, where reader got badly hurt in a fight”

this example would be a Raph x reader, with the prompt 3 from the angst list is said by Raph, and prompt 1 from the fluff list is said by reader.

if you have any questions, please ask!

any reqs that don't follow the rules will be ignored :)

the prompt list: (colours are only for visual reference)

Angst/Emotional:

“All I’ve ever wanted is for you to see me.”

“Just please open your eyes.”

“Wake up. You have to wake up. Please. For me.”

“Just please, don’t leave me.”

“Why does everyone always leave?”

“It hurts so much. Why does it hurt so much? I just want it to stop.”

“I never ask for help because I’m not sure I know how.”

“It’s alright to feel broken every once and a while. And it’s alright to take time to heal.”

“I feel like I’m falling apart.”

“What is it about me that isn’t good enough?”

“I wish I was brave.”

“What's the point in trying if only one of us is willing to?”

“You almost died and you’re making jokes?” (this one screams Leo lmao)

“I’m scared.”

“I don’t need you to tell me who I am!”

“I thought I’d never see you again.”

“Will you even miss me at all?”

‘“You weren’t there…why weren’t you there? I needed you! I needed you! And you weren’t there!”

“I would give up everything for the chance to hear your laugh again. To see you smile. To see you happy.“

“If I never see you again, just know that I love you so, so much.”

“All I wanted was a happy ending.”

"Whatever you do, don’t let go.”

“You don’t have to hide your tears from me.”

“What happened to their happily ever after?” “Not all love stories get a happily ever after, sometimes it’s just once upon a time.”

“I’m not leaving you here.”

“You left without saying goodbye.”

“For once in your life, do what you want! Be selfish!”

“Being strong doesn’t mean never asking for help or admitting you’re in pain.”

“Whatever you do, do not turn around.”

“No matter what they made you think, you are worth saving. You are worth loving.”

“You said you wouldn’t leave, and then you did.”

“I’m a fool for believing you meant what you said.”

“For what it’s worth, I never gave up on you.”

“You are not your past.”

“Don’t look at me like that.”

“Whatever you do, do not close your eyes.”

“I know you’re tired, but you have to stay awake.”

“I’ll come back for you, I promise.”

“You would risk letting all those people die for one person? Why?” “Because it’s not just one person…it’s you.”

“I’m just tired of being tired.”

“Whatever you do, do not make a sound.”

“I always said I’d die for you.” “I didn’t think you meant literally.”

Fluff/Romantic:

“I just can't see myself ever living without you.”

“If there was ever anybody meant for me, it’s you.”

“The closest thing to love at first sight I’ve ever experienced happened when I first laid eyes on you.”

“I didn’t believe in soulmates until I met you.”

“You owe me a kiss.”

“Go with me?” “Only if you hold my hand.”

“I’d feel much better if you’d let me walk you home.”

“If I asked you to stay, would you?”

“You make me feel alive. For the first time ever, I feel like I can breathe.”

“I’ve never felt this way before, and truthfully it scares me. But, the idea of never trying scares me even more.”

“You’re telling me you believe in love at first sight?” “I’m starting to.”

“I promised to love you forever, and that is a promise I intend to keep.”

“Is that my shirt?” “You mean our shirt?”

“You give me a reason to be better, to do better.”

"All I’ve ever wanted was a place to belong. Somewhere I could call home. And you gave me that. Because you are my home.”

“They don’t compare to you. Nobody does.”

“I thought I had the worst luck, until I met you.”

“No matter how much time we’ve spent apart, I never stopped loving you.”

“I could see the worst parts of you and still think you are the most beautiful person I’ve met.”

“I think I’m in love with you.”

“You brought me breakfast?” “Well you said you always forget to eat before you go to work, so I thought I’d make sure you ate something.”

“Everything feels right when you are with me.”

“I don’t care what others say, I want to be with you and that’s all that matters to me.”

“You bought me flowers?” “Yeah, well I noticed you’d seemed kinda down, so I wanted to cheer you up.”

“I’ll be damned if anyone makes you feel like you aren’t worthy of being loved.”

“I wasn’t sure what love really felt like until I met you.”

“I can braid your hair for you- I mean, only if you want.”

“Maybe if you stopped staring at them and actually talked to them, you might have a chance.”

“You said you wouldn’t fall in love with me.” “I lied.”

“I want you. All of you, and not just halfheartedly, but wholly. And maybe that’s selfish, but I don’t care.”

“Can you stay? Just for tonight, please. I don’t want to be alone with my thoughts.” “l’ll stay for as long as you need.”

You are my family.”

“We’ve been by each other’s sides for years, you think I’m gonna leave now?”

“Take my jacket, I don’t want you catching a cold.”

“I’d wait a thousand lifetimes for you, because you are worth waiting for. So when you are ready. I’ll be right here.”

“I will never stop fighting for you. I will never stop protecting you.”

“I can’t stop thinking about you. No matter how hard I try, you’re always on my mind”

“Don’t go on that date.” “Why?” “You know why.” “Say it.”

“Can I kiss you?”

“I don’t want you to die for me, I want you to live for me.”

“I can’t remember the last time I laughed like this.”

“How long have you had this planned?” “Since the moment I fell in love with you.”

“You came all the way here for me?”

“Why are you staring at me?” “Because I think you’re beautiful.”

“I think I’m falling in love with you.” “I think I’m okay with that.”

“What are you doing here?” “I wanted to see if you were okay.”

“The world gets a little brighter when you're around.”

“They say we won't last.” “Then let's prove them wrong.”

Miscellaneous:

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone screw something up that fast before.”

“You come here often?” “Well, I work here. So I think I’d have to say ‘yes’.”

“At least it couldn’t get any worse.” “I really wish you hadn’t said that.”

“I’m too sober for this.” “You don’t even drink.” “Maybe I should start.”

“You couldn’t handle me even if I came with instructions.”

“Wake me up when it’s over.”

“Next problem… we might die.“

"Where have you been all my life?” “Hiding from you”

“I think… Everyone deserves a chance to prove themselves.”

"Abort mission, I repeat abort mission.” “What? Abort what mission? All you were doing was introducing yourself to your neighbor?” “Yeah, and they’re too attractive. I can never speak to them again.”

“At least I kept my promise.”

“I saw you looking at it last time we were in the store together, so I got it for you.”

“…Did you just sniff me?”

“I hope you find it someday.” “Find what?” “Whatever it is you’re looking for.”

“Of course I noticed, I notice everything about you.”

“You can’t get rid of me that easily.”

“Can someone explain to me, in not so many words, why they are here?”

“Why didn’t you answer your phone?” “Why didn’t you text?”

“You’re bleeding.” “No kidding.”

“For the most part, I am, in fact, an idiot. But I fully admit to it, which should count for something.”

“Close your eyes and hold out your hand.”

“I hate that I let you convince me to do this”

“We really need to stop meeting like this. "Then stop breaking into my house!”

“Why are you creeping outside my bedroom window?!” “I thought it would be romantic if I climbed up here.” “You gave me a heart-attack!”

“What are you doing here?” “I got locked out of my house.” “Again?”

“I can’t stand you!” “Then sit down.”

“Where are we going?” “It’s a surprise.” “I hope the surprise involves food.”

“You wont regret it!” “Already am.”

“I like being wanted.” “You should NOT like being wanted by the police!”

“I am nothing if not consistent.” “Yeah, a consistent pain in my butt.”

“What happened?” “Do you want the long version or the short version?” “Uh, short?” “I made a mistake.” “Okay, long version.” “I made a very very big mistake.”

“Do you take constructive criticism?” “Not without crying.”

“Are we all on the same page?” “Yes. Just of different books.”

"I’m sorry, were you talking to me? I tend to zone out whenever you start speaking.”

“What happened to your hand?” “I hit my hand on something.” “On what?” “Your ex’s face.”

“I heard that!” “You were supposed to!”

“I’ve been thinking-” “Uh-oh”

“If I survive this, I’m killing you.”

Scenario Prompts:

For prompts with Characters A and B; you can choose who is the reader/character in your request.

Fall asleep in the same bed, on opposite sides, wake up in each other's arms.

Character A comes to talk to Character B, pretending to be B’s s/o when a stranger is making B uncomfortable. Leads to them asking B out on an actual date.

Running from dangerous person or monster.

Hunting down dangerous person or monster.

Get locked in somewhere together.

Hands brush as you stand next to each other, you think it’s an accident until their hands gently wrap around yours.

Shielding the other with their body to save/protect them.

Caught staring too many times for it to be a coincidence.

Size difference hug; they engulf you.

You refuse to leave so they pick you up and throw you over their shoulder.

Character A can tell Character B is getting nervous in a big crowd, so A slips their hand into theirs to help them calm down.

B taking care of A when they are sick.

Holding hands underneath the table.

Bandaging the other and then kissing the injury gently.

Getting stuck at the top of the Ferris Wheel.

B sitting/standing behind A and leaning into them as they show/teach them how to do something.

As you begin to fall asleep, you feel a gentle kiss pressed to your temple and a blanket draped over you.

B comforting A as they wake up from a nightmare.

A realizing that they have feelings for B when they see them with someone else.

Cliff/floor breaks out beneath A and as they fall B manages to grab their hand at the last second.

Walking together and it starts to rain, so they grab your hand and you start running until you can find somewhere to escape getting wet.

There’s a big storm going on outside while A is at B’s house, so B insists they sleep over.

A falling asleep while sitting next to B, as their head falls onto B’s shoulder, B stays as still as they can, afraid to wake A.

Cloudgazing or Stargazing together, as you lie next to each other, their hand slips into yours.

A grabs B’s hand instinctively out of surprise or fear, and continues to hold it.

A bringing B groceries because they knew they forgot to buy themselves food again.

B is sad because they accidentally threw something important away. A shows up later with said thing, smelling like trash.

A finding a hand-sketched photo of them on B’s desk.

B helping A step down from a high place by taking their hand, and then not letting go as they continue to walk.

Comparing hand sizes, then linking fingers together.

[qutemag]

The only problem with Babylon is Chazelle directed La La Land first -- an essay on La La Land and Babylon

by Benjamin Harkin

(Spoilers for both movies.)

Damien Chazelle is one of the most talented auteurs working today in Hollywood, and his two epics La La Land and Babylon are inverse meta mirrors Hollywood sees itself in and Chazelle interrogates the nature of the industry with a beautiful sense of composition, acting, scripting, and music. He recalls the classic Golden Ages where Hollywood is wistfully looked back on and punctures these periods where other directors of similar stature at their time in their careers tried and failed. Babylon should have been THE movie of 2022 into 2023, sabotaged only by a botched ad campaign and a sense that it wasn't another uplifting light movie like La La Land that everyone expected.

Take La La Land. Although set in modern day, the film is obviously a pastiche and ode to the cheerfully innocent and brightly coloured world of the 50s and 60s spate of Hollywood big budget musicals about young love and finally making it in the big town, following your dreams and being rejected right up until you find yourself, the person you're meant to be with, and then seeing everything fall into place with your passions. Sebastian (Ryan Gosling) is a talented jazz piano player who is sick of marching to other people's drums. He diverts from the set list of his gig at a bar to play a melancholy but more tuneful song, leading to JK Simmons giving him the sack for his repeated impertinence, proving to be a pivotal moment when Mia (Emma Stone), a struggling up and coming actress who's spritely but can't quite land roles, bumps into him and looks to compliment him on the sheer artistry and vulnerability but he pushes past her, a Hollywood moment of meet cute that's tailor made to elicit a sweet moment. Their first date isn't told in flirty dialogue and smiles like a Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan rom-com, but purely in a song and tap dance number that channels Sinatra and Singin' in the Rain (1952), not as overdone and rigidly artificial as (500) Days of Summer's memorable break out of song but more a heartfelt melding of two people, realising they compliment each other against a scenic sunset perfectly.

The film effortlessly transitions in and out of song and dance numbers, each telegraphing where the two main characters are at in their lives, playing out character building scenes with music rather than words. Unlike Scorsese's flaming wreck of a passion project New York, New York (1977) that endeavoured to do the same sort of thing but got the cardinal rule of Hollywood musicals wrong: they can't be a downer. Chazelle covers the same material but ditches the abusive relationship angle that mucked up Scorsese's go for having between the musical numbers a wonderfully blossoming young love. This is a master at his craft firing on all cylinders. The party scene where she runs into him again is hilariously goofy, thoughtfully playful, and the camera tracks across everything going on and Mia's POV with a zest I've not seen from any other director. He gives the filmic electricity to let Emma Stone's bouncy acting and Ryan Gosling's smoldering nervous hot guy energy soar. Chazelle lets the camera roam free over his set pieces and its such an exhilaratingly unrestrained feeling that you can't help but be swept along.

Sebastian sells Mia on picking yourself up and following your dreams, and of course after he unloads on his love of jazz in a bar (winning her over on the genre as well) she of course starts getting call backs on her auditions. He's so thrilled after the date he wanders ponderingly along a beachside walkway and where any other two-bit director would have a silent scene of the waves methodically lapping and the protagonist deep in thought, Chazelle has Gosling whistle and play with a hat he spies on the ground, singing softly "city of stars, are you shining just for me?" in the fact he can't believe his luck, before taking the wife of an old couple passing by for a few dancing spins before moving on, the trace of a song done in what's both an understated way and faithful to the mood of that oft reused trope across romance movies of a protagonist staring into a public bench in contemplation of what could be.

Mia still flubs a few auditions but ducks out of some boring career networking dinner to find the one person she connects with and show him her passion -- cinema. They reunite when Sebastian thinks he's been stood up and goes into the movie anyway, and she walks in front of the screen and almost beckons him to join her in the movie onscreen as she walks to his seat and it moves swiftly to that classic shot of their fingers sliding together over their thighs, before the projector cutely goes on the fritz and they decide instead to reenact the scene portrayed in the movie they were just seeing and visit the observatory, sparks depicted as flying literally of a shot of a tesla coil shooting them out. They consummate their love in dancing into the stars of the observatory, the film breaking all reality with them floating up into the galaxy of the space observatory ceiling and they dance on the Milky Way briefly before coming back to the real, sitting in chairs making out.

The film then zips along all the familiar beats of these young love stories, with an extended cameo by John Legend to ruminate on the state of modern jazz thrown in for good measure. Sebastian and Mia start a scene bathed in bisexual lighting for no other reason than Chazelle is on his victory lap, then sit at a piano in Sebastian's cramped apartment and sing through the relationship.

Sebastian's music career goes on the up, his lame two key piano accompaniment for the big act to make a living no longer some hokey party band hire but John Legend's sold out rock band performances, the spotlight starting with him, then another on Mia so he can wink at her sitting in the audience that he's made it.

Cut to the fall season in Mia feeling left out with his career obligations. He makes an effort to win her over with an intimate dinner date but it proves a failure, Mia already is emotionally checked out underneath the familiar banter. The dinner becomes an uncomfortable truth when she confronts him on the fact he's in a steady ridiculously successful band career doing shit two key piano accompaniments for a rockstar. No better than when he was doing the trashy electronic keyboard at the party. Mia, despite all her career failings, remains true to her passion and Sebastian trades in his dream of owning a jazz club to follow the money. The dinner unceremoniously fails when Sebastian breaks any sense of politeness to take a shot at both Mia's failures in securing any acting roles and his belief rigidly pursuing her dreams has blinkered her to any chance at success, saying that she only liked him when he was down and out like her.

The movie goes the way you expect. At a photo shoot where Sebastian is expected to embrace his inner hated rockstar persona when asked to play something for a little flavour, he plays that same melancholy tune that got him booted from the jazz bar gig. He tries and tries to get Mia back but she's moved on.

The film balances an innocent sense of naivety with a bittersweet reverance as La La Land moves effortlessly to the climax of their time together. The film transcends reality once again and ends in a beautiful montage curving backwards on itself, running back all the memorable points of their relationship that could've gone wonderfully different with a swelling medley of song and dance set pieces. Their romance seen one final time through Hollywood's saccharine musical pomp. One final waltz and encore. A thoroughly Hollywood ending. The film of course was the talk of 2016 and an awards darling. Oscar bait at its finest.

Babylon is a similar structure and filmic style, only transplanted onto a film so radically different in tone, character, and outlook that you'd think someone attempted to recreate La La Land in hell and all they had was the putrid and terrifying scenes lying around them. The film is a three hour bravura tour de force of disgust, near constant nods to abuse and exploitation in Hollywood, and a thesis that with the transition from the silent era to sound, practically every actor, filmmaker, and crew member, was hung out to dry as Hollywood reinvented itself for new technology, and yet Babylon is still somehow also a celebration of cinema like La La Land if only by showing just how much blood, sweat and tears goes on behind the camera of that perfect shot. It's Fellini's 8½ with arthouse sensibilities substituted for too much cocaine and elephant scat play. In the film production moments you can see Chazelle like Fellini getting out his frustrations and reaching catharsis in throwing the curtain back on the downsides of filmmaking.

The film opens with an elephant shitting onto the camera, a too long and too uncomfortable moment almost telling the audience to abandon hope and turn this off barely minutes in. This moves to an utterly depraved Hollywood orgy of all kinds of unspeakable acts, some based in real stories of scandal. Fatty Arbuckle, the first in a long line of Hollywood players revealed to be utterly depraved people, has his scandal depicted here of what could've been some sort of sexual assault or a lethal case of peritonitis, the story nobody could quite figure (still opinion is firmly divided on what transpired, even now), despite multiple trials that resulted in a woman dying in a trashed hotel room, and his career the first in the industry to have to be properly amputated over alleged sexual misconduct, unable to make the comeback only because the whole incident ended up a gift to fatphobia and a fateful heart attack the day Hollywood signed him another contract. Babylon depicts this as her peeing on him and then OD'ing and he left bawling in the aftermath shaking her limp body like a toddler having had his toy broken from smashing it too hard against the ground. The executives stand over the dead woman and Fatty's pathetic display and decide to move the real life elephant (yes, the one who shat on you) crashing the party up from 4am to 2am to distract while they wheel out the corpse.

Oh there's still a jazz band in this one all right (not a Chazelle film if there's no jazz), playing in the middle of the debauched proceedings all African-Americans, seemingly the only ones there among a sea of white writhing bodies, playing some twisted version of the last salute to decency. Threesomes, foursomes, fivesomes, and the masses between people writhing in ungodly dance, mountains of cocaine for the people who start to lag, some guy bemoaning the fact he put an erratic chicken on too much coke and it has to be rescued, offhand mentions of pedophilia going on upstairs. Despite being about 100 years ago, not much has changed in Hollywood's dark corners.

Margot Robbie arrives as perhaps Emma Stone's shadow from the underworld, the complete loss of innocence after Mia actually having gotten parts and seen the inside of the industry rather than turned away every audition, abused and traumatised already so much before the movie begun that she enters the fray fooling the bouncer with a ridiculous stage name Nellie LaRoy as a vain and shallow attention-seeking hanger on, but her looks and scant dress, barely rags, wins over the rest as the life of the party, and her dream of living whatever heights of this twisted Hollywood life are realised on that fateful night. She dances with the best of them, spinning out of control only to prostrate herself and run her hand along the filthy floor like it was a plush couch for a moment before jumping back up to toss her cigarette and continue the dance. Her turn at stardom only comes because an executive sees her dancing on a table in his eyeline in the middle of dealing with corpse disposal and needs to give a director a hot woman to trial for their titillating silent film the next day.

Jack Conrad (Brad Pitt) turns up in a suit as the classic A-lister, the Humphrey Bogart, frequent relationship troubles in lieu of his deep insecurities over career and inability to settle in tow. He is too good to get involved in anything overtly morally reprehensible but he still leaves every woman unhappy in marriage. He orders far too many bottles of alcohol in watching the nightmare to wash out his thoughts on the latest impending divorce.

The film centres on Manny (Diego Calva), a Mexican immigrant who works as a low rung assistant at this party, somehow both in the background and involved in making calls the executives don't want to dirty their hands doing. He weaves in and out of the party as our vehicle into the picture, his shock long left for a determination to get the job done well and a possible promotion into a start in Hollywood. He consults the executive after suggesting to him the elephant to distract from the unsightly body, and the party wound down to strewn party streamers and the odd hungover person stumbling around, to suggest an aspiration to the Hollywood ladder and is instantly cut off and shot down: "You are where you belong."

This sets the stage for the next three hours. Manny falls in love with Nellie's wild child affect and is left in the dust for her celebrity-chasing, the first moment of many. He helps a thoroughly drunk Jack Conrad back to his mansion, where Jack pontificates a bit incoherently on the direction of Hollywood to an opera record he puts on before falling off his balcony, hitting a tiled roof on the way to splash in his pool face down, getting out with a flourish like his absolutely hammered behaviour was another one of his great performances.

Then comes arguably the best set piece in the film. Babylon splits into an utterly inspired montage of insanity in film production. Underpaid and unsafe crew members assemble en masse to chase Manny around a paddock after he drives a still deeply hungover Conrad to set. Producers throw Manny as a sacrificial lamb to the workers in their unwillingness to negotiate. The filmmakers talk over a shot with their star while he's chased by a giant crowd of angry labourers far below in the background.

Nellie LaRoy, having been picked at random, gets her dreams come true as a woman director sighs that she doesn't have the big tits they wanted but she'll have to do. Chazelle casted his wife Olivia Hamilton as the director and she does what's one of the best performances in the film, a woman director making her way in an industry of sleazy men, drama queens and kings, and so many flaming out alcoholics, dead focused on nothing but getting the movie in the can, but with enough funny hand gestures and eyebrow cocks to make the moments that much more farcical. Manny winds up having to be a director assistant to an absolute nutcase of an 'eccentric director', staging epic battle scenes where people are both fake and really are being killed in pursuit of the shot. They stand over a flag bearer who died by being run through by a flag, and make up the excuse on the fly he somehow did it himself and also he was probably going to die anyway. The montage contrasts with Nellie LaRoy getting her chance in a bar scene, which she dutifully whores her body in a drunk sweaty manic ballet of flashing and groping to all the men for the perverted pleasure of the camera capturing the moment. The woman director watches and is suitably impressed, like her, for Nellie's willingness to absolutely give herself up for the movie. Although of course there's a visible boner in an extra's pants that ruins the take. On top of this, Chazelle contrasts with Jack Conrad dictating a rewrite of his scene, doing his whoring offscreen, riffing for dirtier versions of famous lines in cinema that go beyond the period (this is set in the mid 20s) -- "And then he says hasta la vista, motherfucker." "And then he says frankly Scarlett, you're a cunt." And ending each with a "Type it!"

All this is hung on a narrative of Manny rushing to town to grab a replacement camera before the camera hire store closes, as the horses in the battle scene trampled over the ten the production had. He's told it'll be a half hour wait that becomes an hour. He gets back with whatever type of lens they had spare and Jack Conrad manages to stumble out his tent for the single most perfect shot of a romantic embrace at sunset, all the chaos and destruction for this one minute of film. The score in all these scenes is this bizarre riff on La La Land's music, a musical narration technique to have a throughline in these moments, a cacophony of drums and saxophone that keep the pace brisk and at tempo. Chazelle's work is frenetic filmmaking that's perfectly controlled.

The rest of the film is similar scenes of chaos in filmmaking and the industry. And nearly all the characters are composites or loose adaptations of real Hollywood figures of the time. Jack Conrad can't make the leap from silent to talking films and blames the one movie critic who used to flatter him. Nellie projectile vomiting at an upper class party with Hollywood elites where she's supposed to be upping her career profile. There's a subplot of the first major Asian-American actress in Hollywood Lady Fay Zhu (Li Jun Li) (based on real life counterpart Nancy Kwan of The World of Suzie Wong (1960) fame, a film exemplifying the issues), someone of grace and considered thought, her secret pleasure being the unspeakable lesbianism of the time, only to also be debased and wrote off constantly as 'the exotic Oriental' stereotype that dogged representation in Hollywood until only recently. Manny finally getting a chance at director, only to fuck up by trying to cast a by this time well off the rails coke fiend Nellie, and then debasing the African-American jazz lead Sidney (Jovan Adepo) by making him do the performance in caricature, blackface because the lights shining on him make his skin lighter than his colleagues, and they need the American South demographics to make profit so there has to be racism. A Mexican immigrant selling out another person of colour in order to make it.

And yet, beneath all the chaos and exploitation and Hollywood fucking over everyone, the film finishes with Manny years later coming back and seeing his beloved industry onscreen. Babylon ends with a romp through the history of film and Manny watching with tears flowing, a triumphant celebration of cinema magic set to a brilliant image of film being developed in the chemicals as all the noted movie scenes interplay across history. Babylon reveals itself as a tortured love letter to film, and at the same time the opposite message of La La Land, a thoroughly deranged epitaph to the fact Hollywood has no soul, and all those people who were hurt in bringing you that cinematic experience.

Babylon of course came out and bombed. The biggest flop of 2022. The trailer for the film sells you on fun parties and a deliciously gaudy time when the film goes out of its way to be uncomfortable in amidst the farcical comedy. Nobody who turned out for Margot Robbie in Barbie will want to tune in for her unhinged performance here.

The biggest problem though is unfortunately just which movie came first. Expectations were set by La La Land, and then torn apart by Babylon. Chazelle made a terrible calculation that the dark of Babylon would be a fitting follow up to one of the biggest and most upbeat Oscar darlings of the past decade. People went into Babylon expecting La La Land, and while they indeed got the most perfect companion piece, unfortunately people don't want to look at those dark corners Chazelle spotlighted. They wanted La La Land 2, and that closed mindedness and conservative nature of the mainstream moviegoing public is a shame. I can understand people not having the stomach for the film, but I thought there would be a few more interested.

(This actually isn't the first 8 minutes, but this is probably the most illustrative section of the film for this essay.)

La La Land is currently streaming on Stan.

Babylon is currently streaming on Paramount+.

[japaneseadventures]

[Summary] YnM Volume 10, Chapter 37: The White Knight of London, Act 3

[Previous Chapter] [INDEX]

Whiteley contemplates what he's going to do with the evidence to make negotiations go smoothly. While he was having a meal at his residence, Patterson comes to report about an policeman named Bart Fowler who was found dead a few hours ago.

Bart was the one who killed the hitman that attempted to murder Whiteley. Bart's mother was suffering from a serious illness and he needed a large amount of money to pay for her medical fees. Just recently, he paid the hospital £500 in full.

Whiteley concludes that someone must have paid Bart to kill the bomber to prevent the latter from saying anything, but then Bart himself was killed for the same reason.

Due to this development, Patterson proposes to increase the guards patrolling Whiteley's residence, but Whiteley rejects it. He explains that there will just be higher risks as these new guards might be bribed the same way as Bart was. He prefers to just keep the 2 policemen he picked before.

After Patterson leaves, Whiteley states that offense is the best defense, and goes out alone with the evidence in hand to negotiate with the House of Lords.

When he arrived at the meeting place, it was not a member of the House of Lords that were there to greet him but Milverton, who introduces himself as an agent of the House of Lords. Whiteley then presents the evidence he has of the House of Lord's wrongdoings and says that if they ever lay a finger on his family and friends, or reject his election amendments bill, he will reveal to the public all the wrongdoings of the House of Lords.

He will not expose them as long as they agree to those two demands. He also informs him that the documents in his hands are just one of the many copies he has of the evidence. 

Upon hearing all that Whiteley has to say, Milverton tells him that he will relay it all to his client.

Once Whiteley has left, Milverton laughs in amusement because he didn't expect that someone would try and intimidate him, the King of Intimidation. Unfortunately, he says threats don't work on him and Whiteley won't be able to expose the House of Lord's wrongdoings because he plans on stealing the evidence Whiteley has.

How? By turning Whiteley into a murderer. No one would believe anything a murderer says, after all. It would make the evidence he possesses useless.

At the Whiteley residence, Sam finds their maid dead and panics. Sturridge, one of the policemen Whiteley selected, then turns up holding a knife dripping with blood behind his back. He continuously apologizes to Sam as he kills him, telling him that he too has a family he has to consider.

Meanwhile, back in the Milverton residence, Harry and Gosling, the two people who were responsible for the policeman Bart's death, inform Milverton that they have finished all the preparations. Harry then goes on to comment that Milverton sure does like to use underhanded means to take care of things. When asked whether he is condemning Milverton for that, Harry denies it because they too are having fun doing it.

Milverton then asks Harry if he has ever read the Bible, and continues to talk about the Devil that appears in it. He explains that the reason the Devil tempts people into doing evil is simple. Making people do evil things gives them the greatest pleasure.

Since the beginning of time, doing evil have always been enticing for humans. The bible depicts it as the forbidden pleasure. Pursuing that forbidden pleasure is the real evil.

He then goes on to say that evil goes far beyond humans' set rules and ethics. The Lord of Crime is just evil based on the social norms set by human society.

Then, Milverton claims the he is evil itself. Corrupting people into doing evil gives him no greater pleasure.

When Whiteley gets home, he finds his secretary, maid and younger brother all dead. Sturridge then turns up with the knife laid on his hands. He remorsefully confesses that he is the one who killed all of them, which causes Whiteley to yell at him with wild eyes.

And with that, Milverton claims that he has created a new villain. He believes that Whiteley should now have fallen to the dark side. It gives Milverton no greater pleasure than to drag a politician loved by the masses into becoming evil.

Sidenote: The original Charles Augustus Milverton in the Conan Doyle novels was known as the "King of Blackmailers" (恐喝王) where as YnM's version calls him the "King of Intimidation" (脅迫王).  There are probably better ways to translate the latter... Should I have gone with 'threat' instead? I don't read the English scans so Idk what English fandom has gone with, and Wikipedia's entry for 脅迫 is linked to the Intimidaton (and Threat) wiki in English. ;;;

恐喝 means using another person's weakness or secrets for extortion.

脅迫 means threatening another person and filling them with fear to make them do what you want. In criminal law, it means threatening someone harm through words and/or action.

The meanings are similar and can both be translated as blackmail, with slightly different nuances...

[Next Chapter]

[badchoosey]

Rules of Engagement, Book One. Chapter 1: The Heiress

Crew Member: Welcome to Ember of the Sea, the pinnacle of luxury cruise ships. Are you ready to embark on the summer of a lifetime? Sorry, they make me say that. Let me help you with your bags, Miss…? Juicy? You’re part of the group Mr. Singh has been waiting for. Right this way. From what I hear, you’re about to get some very interesting news. Have a seat. Trust me, this is a lot more scenic than our meeting rooms. I’ll tell him you’re here.

You take a seat at the pool bar and gaze out across the ship’s deck to the ocean.

Juicy: … Gorgeous.

???: I was just thinking the same thing. Can I get you a drink, beautiful?

Juicy: Do I look like I want you hitting on me?

???: Ha ha, slow down! I’m just doing my job.

Juicy: Oh! You’re the bartender.

???: Yep. But my friends call me Dog. So, what brings you to our corner of the ocean?

Juicy: Actually, it’s a bit of a mystery. I’m supposed to meet my grandmother’s lawyer here.

Dog: A lawyer, eh? Sounds like you could use that drink. What’ll you have?

Dog hands you a cocktail menu.

Dog: You know, I can tell a lot about a woman by her drink order.

Juicy: Whiskey on the rocks.

Dog: Interesting choice…

Juicy: Oh yeah? What does my drink say about me?

Dog: That you keep things simple.

He slides a tumbler of caramel-colored whiskey across the bar. You take a sip.

Dog: How is it?

Juicy: ...Perfect.

Dog nods and turns to help another customer. Suddenly, you feel someone come up behind you and wrap you in a big hug!

???: Sis! You’re finally here! Are you ready to get crazy tonight?

Juicy: Couture! I can’t believe you’re thinking about partying at a time like this. Aren’t you even a little curious about this mysterious meeting with the lawyer?

Couture: Sure… but that didn’t stop you from flirting with Mr. Hot Bartender!

Juicy: We were just talking.

Couture: Yeah, you’re way too slavish… er… loyal to your guy. I mean, I never liked him, but he is your fiance. Speaking of which, shouldn’t he be here right now?

Juicy: It’s a long story.

Couture: Sounds boring. I say, forget him. Let’s kick this cruise off right! A toast!

Couture snags a glass of champagne off the tray of a passing waiter.

Juicy: Let’s toast to family.

Couture: You always were the sweet one. To family!

You clink your glass with Couture’s and drink. As Couture downs hers, your attention is caught by a professional looking man in a crisp suit.

Dinesh: Ahem. Excuse me, ladies. I’m Dinesh Singh, and I have some paperwork for you to attend to…

Couture: Oh! You must be Nana’s… I mean, Grandma’s lawyer.

Dinesh: Precisely. Thank you for meeting me here. I know it’s highly unusual.

Couture: You mean highly awesome. I can’t believe Nana’s last wish was for us to take this cruise together. I mean, it would be way more awesome if she were here…

Dinesh: From my short time knowing her, it was clear that this summer trip was very important to her. I imagine she wanted you to enjoy your time together, as she did when she was your age on this cruise.

Juicy: Right. Nana never wanted us to worry about her. I miss her so much…

Dinesh: I have something that might just help with that. She left each of you a letter. I also have letters for your other two siblings and cousin when they arrive.

Couture: Oh, they’re running late. You may as well give us ours now.

Mr. Singh hands you each a sealed envelope. You stare at it for a moment.

Juicy: Wow, her last words to us… Couture, do you think we should do something special, like…

Turning, you see Couture has already ripped her letter open and begun reading it.

Couture: Oh. My. God. Juicy, open your envelope now!

You open the envelope…

Nana’s Letter: My dearest Juicy, I hope you’ll forgive me for keeping this from you, but I’ve seen wealth ruin many happy families, and I never wanted that for my children or grandchildren. But now that I’m gone, I want you to know the truth. And I hope you’ll honor my last wishes and find happiness from them.

Juicy: Wait, what does this mean?

Dinesh: Your grandmother was a very, very wealthy woman… And she’s left a $500 million fortune to split among you, your three siblings, and your cousin…

Couture: That’s… $100 million each! We’re rich!

Juicy: I can’t believe this is actually happening…

Dinesh: I assure you, this is very real.

Juicy: I could hire Ryan Gosling to be my butler!

Couture: Ooh, I want Channing Tatum! We can make them wash our cars! Okay, lawyer. I’m ready for my money now. I’ll take it in twenties…

Dinesh: Actually… your grandmother left you each specific instructions for how to receive your inheritance.

Juicy: Instructions?

Dinesh: They’re detailed in the letters.

You and Couture turn to the second page.

Couture: Oh no. This is bad. Here, look…

Nana’s Letter: Dearest Couture, You’ve never learned the value of hard work. To get your inheritance, you must keep a job on board the ship for the entire summer.

Couture: Nana’s making me work for this money! Didn’t she love me at all?

Juicy: Come on, you know Nana adored all of us. She practically raised us after Mom and Dad…

Couture: Yeah, except my life was all student loans and instant ramen when it could’ve been private jets and solid-gold Ferraris. Besides, it’s going to be impossible for me to do her task. Are you sure there aren’t any exceptions?

Dinesh: Unfortunately not. Your grandmother was very specific with the wording in her will.

Couture: But how am I even supposed to get a job here?

Dinesh: Arrangements have been made for you to work in the ship’s finest restaurant, Nomade. You start this week.

Couture: This week?! At least Juicy’s going to be there with me, right?

You read the rest of your letter…

Nana’s letter: Juicy, you’ve already found the love of your life. I know you’ve always struggled with being decisive and making commitments, so I want to help you overcome that. At the end of the summer, when the cruise reaches its final port, an elegant wedding has been prepared for you and your beloved fiance. You only need to make your vows to earn your share.

Couture: Pfft. That’s easy! You’ve got it made!

Juicy: Maybe not… Couture, can we talk in private?

Dinesh: I’ll take my leave. Should you have any questions, your grandmother stipulated that I stay on the ship for the duration of the summer to see her wishes carried out.

As Mr. Singh walks away, you and Couture head toward your cabin.

Couture: Okay, we’re alone now. Spill.

Juicy: It happened last night. My fiance...Dank… he had to work late at his startup and I finished packing for the cruise early… So I decided to surprise him with his favorite dinner.

Twelve hours earlier…

You walk into Dank’s startup office, holding a bag of takeout.

Juicy: (It’s so dark in here…)

???: Oooh, Dank! Yes!

Juicy: Hello? Dank?

You fumble for the switch and turn on the lights!

You see Dank on the couch… with a half-naked girl on top of him!

Half-Naked Girl: Uh, a little privacy please?

Juicy: Privacy?!

Dank: Juicy!

Half-Naked Girl: Ohh… You’re Juicy… This must be like, really sad for you.

Juicy: That’s one of the things I’m feeling.

Dank: I thought you were packing! What are you doing here?

You clench the takeout bag in your hand.

Juicy: Here’s your dinner!

You hurl the container at them, and it bursts open, sending spaghetti and meatballs flying! One smacks Dank right in the face!

Dank: Hey!

Half-Naked Girl: Eek!

With tears filling your eyes, you turn… and run.

Juicy: And that’s what happened.

Couture: Yikes. You caught your fiance cheating on you, and you just ran off?

Juicy: Not my best moment, I know.

Couture: Look, that guy was a jerk. None of us really liked him, and we were all secretly hoping you’d break up with him anyway.

Juicy: We really need to work on your pep talks.

Couture: I guess the big question is whether or not it’s worth $100 million to marry a lying, cheating, scumbag like Dank.

Juicy: Ugh. Never in a million years. To tell you the truth, I don’t even know if I can handle facing him ever again.

You reach your cabin… and pause.

Juicy: Wait a second, the door’s already open.

Couture: Housekeeping?

You nudge open the door and find…

Dank: Juicy!

Juicy: Dank?!

Dank: I’m so glad I found you! I can’t believe you just left without me! I have something to say…

Juicy: This better be good.

Dank: I made a mistake.

Juicy: I already knew that… Get out.

Dank: This is my room, too.

Juicy: Fine, then I’m leaving.

You turn to go.

Dank: Wait!

You storm out and Couture and Dank follow after you!

Dank: Juicy! Stop being childish! We need to talk!

Couture: Hello? She caught you cheating on her! You’re the last person she’d want to talk to!

Dank: Couture, stay out of this. I’ve listened to podcasts that last longer than your relationships. This is between me and Juicy. She knows she’s not blameless in all of this. A relationship is a complicated thing.

You veer out the exit and onto the main deck. Dank trips over himself to catch up to you.

Dank: Juicy, I never would’ve cheated on you if you hadn’t been so distant. You practically pushed me into Sabrina’s arms!

You stop short and stare at him in disbelief.

Juicy: I… what?

Couture: You know, Dank, it’s good you’re here. Perfect, really, because my sister’s got something she wants to tell you. Right, Juicy?

Couture nudges you in the ribs.

Couture: Come on, this is your chance to really let him have it!

Juicy: I’ve got nothing to say. I don’t want to talk to you, Dank.

Dank: You can’t just shut me out.

Couture: Just watch us! Now back off, or I’m calling security.

Dank sighs.

Dank: Come on, Juicy… We’ve spent the last five years together. Are you really going to break up with me? And just hope you find someone new? Who else is gonna put up with all your little quirks and insecurities? I know you. I’m the only one who’ll ever love you.

You say nothing. He turns to go.

Dank: Forget it. I’ll give you some space. You obviously need it. But this isn’t over.

Dank leaves.

Couture: Ugh, what a jerk.

Juicy: He’s not wrong… My whole life was built around him. What if he’s right? I mean, I know you enjoy being single, but I hate it. And even Nana wanted me to marry him. It’s the only way to get my inheritance.

Couture: I’m sure Nana wouldn’t have wanted this. Actually… let me see that letter again.

You both look at the letter…

Couture: Nana never said you had to marry Dank. Just someone. You’ve got the whole summer to find a new fiance!

Juicy: That’s not a lot of time…

Couture: That doesn’t mean it’s impossible. Ever heard of love at first sight? You totally have a chance at this.

Juicy: … You know what? I can do this. I’m not going to let Dank ruin my life and make me miss out on $100 million.  I’ve got a dream wedding waiting for me at the end of the summer and three months of a luxury cruise to the most romantic places on earth. There’s a man out there who’s going to love me for me… And I’m going to find him.

[crdenhart]

25 Favorite Movies from Each Year of My Life

Today is my 25th birthday.  Having seen thousands of movies in my lifetime, there are some films that have stood out among the rest and I cherish more than others.  This list is not necessarily my top 25 favorite films of all time but the best film from each year of my life thus far.  All these movies are ones I will definitely watch all the way through if I flip through the channels and they are on TV or select them if they are available on Netflix.  I highly recommend you see these films if you have not… actually it’s my birthday wish that you do!

1993: The Fugitive

One of the best action-thrillers of all time!  The believability premise holds up surprisingly well even 25 years later with huge advances in tracking technology.  Harrison Ford and Tommy Lee Jones both give some of their best performances.  Really intense action sequences, my favorite being the dam scene with the chase and the jump.

1994: Hoop Dreams

The greatest sports movie and best documentary ever!  It is amazing how a film that captures real-life events tells a story better than any Hollywood film script.

1995: Toy Story

The film that started the computer-animated movie genre.  Hundreds of CGI-animated films have been released since Toy Story and there have been improvements in animation quality but few have been able to match it and none have been able to top its brilliance or significance to the medium of film.  Woody and Buzz are two of my favorite movie characters and were among my favorite toys growing up!  I challenge Hollywood to aim to move the film medium forward and finally surpass this film and go to infinity and beyond!

1996: Fargo

One of the best crime dramas/dark comedies of all time!

1997: Boogie Nights

Amazing cast and soundtrack!  I love the look and feel of the movie and the 1970s setting.  It made filmmaker Paul Thomas Anderson famous which has led to many incredible films by him.

1998: The Truman Show

One of Jim Carrey’s best performances and one of the most interesting and creative movie concepts with the entire “life is just a TV show” premise.

1999: Eyes Wide Shut

One of the most brilliant movies ever made, especially in terms of its symbolism and visual depth!  Absolutely every shot has some underlying meaning; it has been nearly 20 years and audiences still come up with new theories!  No one will ever know what this film is really about since its filmmaker Stanley Kubrick died before its release.  Beyond genius filmmaking!

2000: Almost Famous

Whenever I go to a music show (especially ones where I know the band and take pictures) I always envision myself as the main character.  I love everything about this film; the cast, the music, the ‘70s setting, the feel-good atmosphere.

2001: Donnie Darko

One of the most brilliant American films of the 21st century so far.  The intricate plot, awesome ‘80s soundtrack, realistic ‘80s setting (actually looks like how the late 1980s actually were and not the over-exaggeration of how the decade is usually depicted in movies and TV shows with nostalgic goggles (i.e. Stranger Things, IT remake)), impressive acting, wonderful cinematography all add up to make a heck of a psychological thriller.

2002: Catch Me If You Can

The best Steven Spielberg movie of the last 20 years!  Both Leonardo DiCaprio and Tom Hanks give impressive performances.  The movie is both fun and serious at the same time and well paced and always moving like the characters on the run.

2003: The School of Rock

Jack Black’s best role.  A fun kids movie that all ages can enjoy!  Really enjoy all the rock music references.

2004: Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind

Jim Carrey’s best film!  Extremely creative premise and really cool visual style!

2005: Star Wars: Revenge of the Sith

The Star Wars fans seem to hate on this movie and I admit it has its issues (i.e. “From my point of view, the Jedi are evil”), but I cannot deny this entry is one of the most exciting in the Star Wars franchise.  I actually like Revenge of the Sith more than The Last Jedi, Return of the Jedi, and Rogue One.  Really amazing visual effects and exciting fight sequences, especially the finale when Anakin and Obi-Wan fight each other at the same time Yoda and the Emperor fight each other.

2006: Little Miss Sunshine

One of the best comedies of the 21st Century.  It seems like every indie-type comedy since tries to be like this film (i.e. Juno, The Way Way Back, Youth in Revolt, Dan in Real Life, The Kids Are All Right, Up in the Air).  Great performances by the entire cast who all have brilliant chemistry together.  Absolutely hilarious and smart comedy!

2007: No Country for Old Men

Javier Bardem steals the show!  This might be the best film of the 21st century so far!

2008: The Dark Knight

Heath Ledger steals the show!  There hasn’t been a superhero movie to top this one since (the current Marvel movies are okay but too generic and the current DC movies either take themselves too seriously and/or fail at trying to be like Marvel).  The film has incredible performances by the entire cast (especially Heath Ledger in his final fully completed role as the Joker) and the film plays out more like a brilliant crime drama than a superhero film; you could take Batman out of the equation and it would still be really good.  I saw this film 3 times in the movie theater.  It ruled 2008!  Classmates, teachers, family members, people from church; everyone went nuts over this film and still is my favorite superhero movie along with 2002’s Spider-man!

2009: 500 Days of Summer

Probably the best romantic movie of the 21st century!  Solid performances by Joseph Gordon-Levitt and Zoey Deschanel, awesome soundtrack, really inventive use of story structure with constantly switching back and forth between past and present.  My favorite scene is the “expectation/reality” sequence with the side-by-side split screen.

2010: The Social Network

The Citizen Kane of 21st century edgy biopics!  It seems like every movie or TV show since about the tech industry (i.e. The Imitation Game, Snowden, The Fifth Estate, Steve Jobs, Halt and Catch Fire) has tried to copy this film.  Well-crafted script, excellent performances, and brilliant cinematography and special effects (I actually thought Armie Hammer performance as the two Winklevoss twins was two actors when I first saw the film).  One of the best if not the best of the 2010s so far.

2011: Drive

Ryan Gosling’s best performance.  The soundtrack is incredible (the song “Real Hero” is frequently played on my iPhone).

2012: The Master

Masterful cinematography and acting, especially Joaquin Phoenix and Philip Seymour Hoffman’s performances.  I really like how the entire movie is really about Scientology.  Feels like a Stanley Kubrick film!

2013: Prisoners

One of the most violently disturbing films in recent years!  Some really intense moments and incredible performances, especially Paul Dano as a mentally handicapped villain.

2014: Gone Girl

Rosmund Pike steals the show!  Also one of Ben Affleck’s best performances.  The scene where Amy kills Desi is quite intense and the best scene of the movie!

2015: Star Wars: The Force Awakens

JJ Abrams brought Star Wars back in an incredible way!  One of the best blockbuster films in the 21st century.  Lots of iconic scenes and exciting sequences and well-developed new characters.

2016: Kubo and the Two Strings

Superb stop-motion animation!  I like the use of “While My Guitar Gently Weeps” by the Beatles.  Lots of fun and exciting action and very deep story.

2017: Twin Peaks: The Return

Twin Peaks has to be amongst the most brilliant works of media ever created.  It deserves a category of it own.  Watching the series/movie (its creator David Lynch sees Twin Peaks: The Return as an 18-part movie and not a season of a TV show) is like no other work in film, television, or the web.  It’s the visual equivalent of listening to album by The Beatles or Pink Floyd; it feel like a message sent from the Universe itself.

[wanna1things]

Get to know me tag!!

AHHH thanks for tagging me @newsunnyd sorry it took;; so long i am a terrible procrastinator!!!

rules: tag people you want to get to know better!

tagging: I HAVE A SERIOUS INABILITY TO TAG PEOPLE if you see this and want to do this feel free to!!! just tag me so I can see it!!

Name: Elizabeth!! but most people call me Chet or Elle ,, hence the Chet ,,,

Gender: Female

Star Sign: Leo!! (although I’m told I act nothing like a leo...)

Height: 164cm,,, 5′4..... i grew 0.5cm recently :))) hooray for growing!

What’s your middle name? Rebecca Grace 

Put your music library on shuffle. What are the first 6 songs that popped up?

the.the.the - Longguo & Shihyun (bop of the century)

Romance - Shinee (I love this song!! and I love shinee!!)

Music Up - Rainz (i love my adopted sons)

500 Days of Summer - Yu Seungwoo (my baby!! my BABY!!)

Guess Who - Taemin

Lost & Found/My Heaven - Nu’est (fave fave fave fave fave fave)

Grab a book nearest you and turn to page 23. What is the 17th line? 너우 매워서,먹기가 어렵지요? [It was spicy, so eating it was hard right?]  (its from my korean textbook lol) I mean i suppose spicy food is hard to eat...

Ever had a poem/song written about you? I hope not... I have had a story written about me but... that’s not a fun story!

When was the last time you played air guitar? I... rarely do this I’m more of an air piano person or air drums if i’m listening to the right music... or dance along??? like clicking my fingers and stuff, I like doing that.

Who is your celebrity crush? uhhh I mean I like ryan gosling but that’s pretty... normal... within kpop i have to say my boy Yu Seungwoo is like.... my ultimate crush and Jacob from the boyz!!! They’re both really sweet and nice people so ^^ i’m a sucker for nice people...

What is a sound you hate? Love? I hate like nails on blackboads and stuff and also like squeaky noises? as for love uhh... birds chirps?? especially in the morning, I’m not a morning person but its nice to wake up to! and cats meows, i love those! they’re the reason i’m alive!

Do you believe in ghosts and/or aliens? I wouldn’t say no to aliens, I mean come on the universe is so big there’s got to be conditions for life elsewhere... as to whether they have the ability to travel? I debate that. As for ghosts, I’m not sure. I just enjoy watching buzzfeed unsolved.

Do you drive? If so, have you ever crashed? The only driving i do is on Mariokart Wii (not Wii U, am too poor). Catch me in Peach Gardens in 1st place. I’ve never taken driving lessons, even though I’m old enough to (18), but my friends who have all have failed haha!

Do you like the smell of gasoline? yes!! i prefer the smell of fire though, not in a weird way, just it reminds me of when I was younger my family and I used to have loads of bonfires and we’d sit around it eating ice creams lol 

What’s the last movie you saw? Blade Runner 2049!! I watched it with my dad because I got him the DVD for christmas and can i just say that’s my favourite movie franchise.... i’m actually obsessed... I’ve watched the first one about 10 times, in all the different cuts, and the sequel I saw 3 times in the cinema!!

What’s the worst injury you’ve had? I cut my head open in a shoe shop. I can’t remember how old I was, but I was in primary school, and I had to have my head glued and I couldn’t wash my hair for a week. If anyone’s british they’ll remember Barrats, the shoe shop, well... I was part of the reason they got shut down! I fainted when i was sitting in one of the seats, and the displays had metal edges so... now if you go into any shoe shop there’s no metal edges! you have me to thank for that aha! Head injuries run in my family, because my brother cut his head open too! (his wasn’t in a shoe shop, but by a Frisbee?)

Do you have any obsessions right now? post it notes. i can’t stop buying them. in the past month i’ve spent £30 on post-its but i have black ones!!! and they’re so cool!! so it’s worth it! i’m also obsessed with glittery gel pens and well... cool stuff to write with in general... but aside from that i’ve got a newfound obsession with sci-fi books? i read 5 phillip k dick books in one month while still studying at uni so...

Do you tend to hold grudges against people who have done you wrong? I don’t usually hold grudges like i forgive people easily, but if they’ve said something kind of mean to me then even though i’m not holding a grudge against them it would make me kind of,,, insecure?? but i wouldn’t hold it against them it would just be something i’d think about when lying awake at night

Are you in a relationship? nope!! and to be perfectly honest i don’t really... have the time for a relationship... learning ancient chinese is taking up 100% of my free time

[pidgesheadphones-blog]

GTA 6 Release Date & System Requirement

When does GTA 6 come?

With the official announcement of Red Dead Redemption 2 in October 2016, a possible announcement of GTA 6 is probably once again a long way off. The Western epic will be released in late 2017 and Rockstar Games will certainly use most of its resources on this project. Of course, other Rockstar Studios could already work on GTA 6 .

Let's take a look at the release cycle of the GTA parts that have appeared so far. So appeared GTA 3 2001 GTA 4 seven years later in 2008. Five years later finally saw the so far last part of GTA 5 the light of the video game world. For a better illustration, see the following table.

GTA 6 Release Date & System Requirement

GTA 322 October 2001

GTA Vice City27 October 2002

GTA San Andreas26 October 2004

GTA 429 April 2008

GTA 517 September 2013

GTA 6 End of 2018/2019?

As you can see, most of the GTA games have always appeared in the autumn,punctually before the Christmas season. If you follow the pattern of five years, GTA 6 could appear late 2018. However, we think this is unlikely due to Red Dead Redemption 2. The release of GTA 6 will probably take place at the earliest at the end of 2018 , but probably 2019 or even 2020 .

Poll: Which GTA part is the best?

To shorten the waiting time, let us know from you which GTA part is actually the best. Of course every player has a different opinion here. My favorite GTA part is about GTA Vice City . The 80s flair of Miami with the great soundtrack in my opinion was never again so well captured.

For many players, however, GTA San Andreas is the undisputed number one because of the huge gameplay and gameplay possibilities. But let's not forget GTA 3, which has mastered the leap from the 2D perspective in GTA 2 to the 3D game world with Bravur. GTA 4 and GTA 5 have finally perfected the gameplay and set the bar for an upcoming GTA 6 very high.

Let us know in the following survey which GTA part you think is the best and write us the reasons for your decision as well in the comments !

Poll: Which GTA part is the best?Which GTA part is your opinion the best?For 20 years now, the GTA series has been enjoying one highlight after another. But which GTA is now the best game of the series? You are spoiled for choice or is the decision clear to you? Choose your favorite part from the following options.GTA (plus add-ons)GTA 2GTA 3GTA Vice CityGTA San AndreasGTA AdvanceGTA Liberty City StoriesGTA Vice City StoriesGTA 4 (plus add-ons)GTA Chinatown WarsGTA 5Continue

The GTA series is packed with highlights. But which GTA part is now the best?

Update of 23 January 2017

GTA 6 has been released! In Brazil ... for the PS2 ...

What crazy features of the hype around GTA 6 can take is shown by Fake and bootleg versions of GTA 6 , which are currently distributed in Brazil. There was now a PlayStation 2 game discovered by GTA 6 , which is, of course, only a fake. On the cover is actress Summer Glau from the Terminator series "The Sarah Connor Chronicles" to see.

These badly made fake games are not a rarity, especially in Brazil and Indonesia. In the best cases you will find modifications for GTA: San Andreas . In the worst case, there is another or no game on the data carrier. But it is funny. You will also find the following video of the YouTube channel Vargskelethor Joel for more dreary copies of this kind .

Original article

GTA 6: Next stop San Diego?

The biggest mystery around GTA 6 is, of course, the place of action . In the past, Rockstar Games has already secured the naming rights for the cities of Tokyo and Bogota, which has allowed gamers to speculate that the next part will play outside the US borders for the first time.

However, other rumors are against it and many analysts and fans expect a GTA 6, which will play in San Diego . The metropolis with 1.3 million inhabitants in the south-west of California is close to the Mexican border and offers all prerequisites for a virtual image of a new Grand Theft car.

However, there are many other rumors around the hand of GTA 6.

Many fans will want a GTA: Tokyo , but this is difficult to realize, according to rumors due to the cramped street system of the Japanese capital.

When Leslie Benzies was still Managing Director of Rockstar North, he did not have the idea to program a GTA 6 that would bring together many of the places from the past.

Other possible venues would be San Fierro or Las Venturas. These places were missing parts of the puzzle on the map of GTA: San Andreas and offer themselves as possible places of action.

Dan Houser , co-founder of Rockstar, said in an interview already that he would limit the GTA franchise not only to American culture alone. A GTA 6 outside the American borders would still be possible.

So it could also come to a GTA: London . However, this would mean a big change for the players, after all there is left-hand traffic in England and the cars have their steering wheel on the right.

GTA 6: New gameplay innovations desired

Hardly any other gameplay has grown with every part as GTA. With each offshoot, the game world grew bigger and you had more ways to get the time out in the sandbox game. However, there are still many wishes of the fans, the game to extend even more gameplay mechanics and make it more realistic.

Start picture gallery(41 pictures)40 Details in GTA 5, which you have not noticed yet

Surveys among players and a lot of rumors to the protagonists give themselves daily the latch in the hand.

Vehicle categories should differ more. For example, players would prefer that you can not climb mountains with super sports cars or break off the prairie off road.

There are also stubborn rumors that GTA 6 is introducing a female protagonist for the first time . This is to be spoken by actress Eva Mendes.

Fitting to this is Hollywood star and life companion of Eva Mendes, Ryan Gosling the role of the male protagonist to take over.

The departure of Leslie Benzies, Rockstar's long-time boss, who has shaped the series from GTA 3 to GTA 5, can not be ruled out.

GTA 6: Release and Platforms

The release of GTA 6 is still far away and it is to be assumed that the development, if at all, is still in an early stage. So it might well be that GTA 6 appears on time for the release of the new consoles PlayStation 5 and Xbox Two . As with GTA 5, there could also be offshoots for the PlayStation 4 and Xbox One .

However, the financial success of GTA Online speaks against this . The multiplayer part of GTA 5 alone has generated $ 500 million through micro transactions. As long as GTA Online is still running well and much is played, Rockstar may not see any urgency to develop a GTA 6. Rockstar Games would like to present his next projects in the near future and maybe we will first see a Red Dead Redemption 2 before continuing with GTA 6.

What do you wish for GTA 6?

Now you are asked! What should your GTA 6 look like? What do you wish for a place of action and a protagonist? What new gameplay mechanics are there for the Open World adventure? Write us your opinions in the comments!

[junker-town]

A good NFL quarterback isn’t *that* hard to find

Photo by Rob Carr/Getty Images

This week, the best quarterbacks in the league were undervalued, and some of the most vaunted sucked out loud.

The NFL and NFL-adjacent people are so bad at evaluating quarterbacks, it’s scary.

It feels perfect to bring this up now, considering the weekend we just had. Colin Kaepernick held a workout and proved he’s still the same really good player he was when he was forced out of the league — all while golden children and heirs apparent stunk up my TV so bad I wanted to change the channel on multiple games. Of course, the opposite is true too, and you might see a theme here while we break down the best and worst quarterbacks of the weekend.

Lamar Jackson posted a QB rating of 139.2, his fifth game this season finishing with a rating over 100. This from a guy who some honestly, fervently believed was going to have to move to wide receiver in the NFL in order to be effective.

How the hell has Dak Prescott’s season been so quiet? I understand we all have this unspoken oath not to compliment anything the Cowboys do, but like ... damn he’s been phenomenal. On Sunday, Prescott became the first Cowboys quarterback to throw for over 3,000 yards in the first 10 games of a season. At this pace, he will finish with over 5,100 yards and 34 touchdowns. Prescott wasn’t taken until the fourth round of the 2016 draft. It’s early to say it, but we can go there: He might be the best QB of that class, period.

Then there’s Jacksonville. This one is a little more complicated. On the one hand I get it; the Jags paid a lot of money to Nick Foles, and the old NFL adage is that guys shouldn’t lose their jobs due to injury. On the other hand, no team deserves more of a pass in breaking unwritten rules than the Jaguars. They hadn’t seen inspiring quarterback play through two presidents, maybe longer depending on how highly you value David Garrard. Then finally someone exciting comes along in Gardner Minshew and gives fans hope. Sure, he struggled a little recently, but Minshew was whisked away just so Foles could return and get blown out by the Colts.

Meanwhile in Carolina, the Panthers learned that maybe, just maybe, Kyle Allen isn’t the second coming of Tom Brady. On Sunday, he threw four interceptions against one of the league’s worst pass defenses, helping the Panthers to a 29-3 loss against the hapless Falcons. Remember when Allen was so transcendent Cam Newton was out the door? Yeah, that was 10 days ago ... lol. So dumb.

Mitchell Trubisky ain’t it — at least not this season. The Bears have a good enough defense that they could probably make waves right now if they had someone who didn’t need 43 throws to get 190 yards.

And a reminder:

Mitchell Trubisky was drafted 2nd overall in the 2017 NFL Draft. Patrick Mahomes was drafted 10th and Deshaun Watson was drafted 12th. pic.twitter.com/6ft35Uzq2a

— NFL Research (@NFLResearch) November 18, 2019

The point of all this is to note just how dumb the NFL has gotten when it comes to the quarterback position. There’s such a thing as overthinking the obvious, and passers have been turned into pretzels with tenuous hyperbole, overexaggerated criticism, and bizarre, tangential justifications for potential failure like hand size or “ability to process information.”

My tip to the NFL teams out there trying to find a quarterback in 2020 and beyond: If you have a guy and he doesn’t suck, don’t part ways with him. If you don’t have a guy, find one in college who is good and can win games, and then draft him. Done. The rest is all noise.

My second tip to NFL teams in need of a quarterback: If you’re hovering around the .500 mark thanks to your defense and running back, but keep getting let down by the guy throwing the football, sign Kaepernick, you dumbos. I know someone out there might convince you he’d be a “distraction,” but I promise you watching Kyle Allen throw four interceptions, or Trubisky average 4.4 YPA is way more distracting that anything Kap could do. Hear me, Panthers? Listening, Bears?

Anyway, let’s jump around the league before I get death threats.

The customer is always right.

"Sell the team! Sell the team!" pic.twitter.com/0oM1vdHtdx

— Jim Brady (@jimbrady) November 17, 2019

This chant should be legally binding. I don’t know how we’d enforce it, but I’m sure there’s some way we could claim the Washington NFL team by eminent domain. I want to give this team back to the fans. By all accounts, the franchise is worth $3.4 billion. That means if we just tacked 86 cents on everyone’s taxes a month, we could all claim ownership of the team.

I’m not a legal expert but I am 100 percent sure this will work. I mean, it can’t be worse than the alternative, which is seeing $10 home tickets not ever sell out in Washington.

Rules don’t make sense anymore.

As a leader in the NFL, we need someone new in New York deciding calls. https://t.co/szdHjWhKbR

— Deandre Hopkins (@DeAndreHopkins) November 17, 2019

That was not called a penalty, even after a challenge. Then:

This was called DEFENSIVE pass interference on the #Cardinals pic.twitter.com/crTCZYz5EE

— Dov Kleiman (@NFL_DovKleiman) November 17, 2019

I know people are saying the 49ers’ non-call is payback for a blown call earlier, but I think we should just accept that NFL refs try to have make goods. They should have to turn to the camera and make the physical embodiment of the shrug emoji when they know a call is coming down that everyone hates and it will make no sense. That way, at least we could be a little more understanding.

I’d like to file a missing person’s report on Jared Goff.

What has happened to our beautiful, sweet, football boy? The last time I really paid attention to him, Goff was this 4,000-yard, MVP-maybe player who took the Rams to the Super Bowl.

Now he’s basically Sam Darnold, but with a better haircut, an intact spleen, and a greater chance I’d mistake him for Ryan Gosling while squinting. Don’t believe me?

Oh, you probably wanted a stat comparison ...

Darnold: 148/234 (63.2%), 1,600 yds, 11 TD, 10 INT, 81.1 rating Goff: 225/373 (60.3%), 2,783 yds, 11 TD, 10 INT, 82.1 rating

Anthony Miller with the sneak of the week.

pic.twitter.com/lh6nLzHBtc

— Will Brinson (@WillBrinson) November 18, 2019

I totally respect the “sneaking one more cookie from the jar” kind of hustle on this play. Who cares if you’re in a stadium full of people? You only need to fool a few zebras to make this all pay off.

The NFL’s most emotional hip.

The Bears say Mitch Trubisky has a hip injury and is questionable to return.

— JJ Stankevitz (@JJStankevitz) November 18, 2019

The Bears didn’t take this hip news well.

If you’re watching on TV, you saw NBC capture this. Of course, we’ll have questions for Matt Nagy after the game. #Bears pic.twitter.com/QECPMY4irn

— Rich Campbell (@Rich_Campbell) November 18, 2019

Shameless self-promotion for my memes.

Ron showing up at Cam's house tonight like pic.twitter.com/2YiVBNKCka

— James Dator (@James_Dator) November 17, 2019

For the love of God, don’t get rid of Cam Newton, Panthers.

[goosewriting]

alrighty, goslings, it is time >:)

with yesterday's post, that concludes all the reqs i wanted to finish before the year ends. so now it’s finally time for the special event, which was originally for 350 subs but has now become a 500 subs event because we’re at 492 🥺💞 i am so thankful for all your comments and reblogs!! they motivate me to keep going <3

the event will be… 🥁drumroll🥁… prompts! i’ll make a proper post explaining the rules for those. please read them when the time comes :’)))

mark your calendars:

on Wednesday January 4th i'll post the rules and the prompts, so you can take a proper look, and you’ll have a couple of days to think about what you wanna request.

the requests (for these prompts only!) will open at 14:00 CET (Central European Time) on Saturday January 7th, and stay open for 24 hours so everyone gets a chance. Please respect the time window!

i'm very excited for this event and i hope you'll look forward to it as much as me! :>

in the meantime i’ll take a little break, and explore some other fandoms i’ve been wanting to try writing for…. who knows where that will lead me 👀 (stay tuned on ao3 for those)

[douchebagbrainwaves]

WHAT NO ONE UNDERSTANDS ABOUT WAY

Small organizations can develop new ideas faster than large ones, and no particular connection between them. Technology will increasingly make it possible to relive our experiences. S i; return s;; This falls short of Leonardo, for example. What happened? Sealing off this force has a double advantage. We didn't draw any conclusions. Intriguingly, there are sometimes multiple answers.1 And so Google doesn't have to advertise. To make something users love, and that's what they're going to buy, just to make sure they're ok guys. Now they have none that stand out.

If you're writing for yourself you have different priorities. Every futon sofa in Cambridge seemed to have the same fat white book lying open on it. Arguably a market is such a form of 7, though there doesn't seem to be: that in the coming century is a huge increase in productivity.2 All you need to have any particular expertise to have opinions about it. If you try this trick, you'll probably be struck by how different it feels when your computer is disconnected from the Internet.3 In 1970 you were still supposed to get jobs, as if it were. It's why the best abstract painting still falls short of the spec because it only works for integers. Between about 500 and 1000, life was not very good in Europe. I notice that I tend to conclude with a few vague questions and then drift off to get a really big bubble: you need a San Francisco?4

One got extra credit for motives having to do something you'd like to do but can't. The only kind of software you can build without studying users is the sort for which you are the typical user. I have to pause when I lose my train of thought, and some trains of thought just peter out. The fact that the best startup ideas seem at first like bad ideas. So if you want to be in the best position to conquer the rest of Lisp out of it. You can use the cram schools to show you where most of the money in VC funds comes from their endowments. So suppose Lisp does represent a kind of intellectual archaelogy that does not need to be able to generate revenues.

This can only happen in a very limited way in a list of n things is a dishonest format: when you use it to write software that will sell your hardware, you have to do to keep working anyway, and about fifteen minutes of reading a night. Venture investments are usually described in terms of that number. Far from it. Another way to figure out for yourself what's good. 7, though there doesn't seem to be unusually smart, and C is a pretty low-level one. More like the first step is to realize there's a problem. Indeed, they're bad in a particular way: they tend to write it first for whatever computer they personally use.5 N; public int call int i s s i; return s;; This falls short of the spec because it only works for integers.

And the culture she defined was one of the most pointless of all the parts, as ITA presumably does, you can have a fruitful discussion about a topic only if it doesn't engage the identities of any of the other guy's talk would be like drinking from a firehose. My final test may be the sort of people, to start software startups. Writing eval required inventing a notation representing Lisp functions as Lisp data, and such a notation was devised for the purposes of the paper with no thought that it would be useful if I explained what a nerd was. In startups, the big winners. Arguing two sides of a case may be a necessary evil in a legal dispute, but it's an everyday thing in Lisp.6 Garbage-collection. I talked to a number of VCs, but eventually we ended up financing our startup entirely with angel money.7 With the bizarre consequence that high school students now had to write about it. If an acquirer thinks you're going to start a company now, you may find you no longer have such a burning desire to be an advantage as an economy gets more liquid, just as low notes travel through walls better than high ones. Imagine if we were visited by aliens.

And yet, financially at least, a thesis was a position one took and the dissertation was the argument by which one defended it. Microsoft's original plan was to make money? It's not what people learn in classes at MIT and Stanford that has made technology companies spring up around them. Hard as this was to believe in the mid-1980s, nerd was still an insult. For the essayist this translates to: flow interesting. So the products that start as cheap, simple options tend to gradually grow more powerful till, like water rising in a room, they squash the high-end products against the ceiling. I decided not to, because that's where smart people meet.

Really?8 I got was $12. If you leave a project for a few months, it can take a very long time. She was even uncomfortable at our wedding, because the time it takes to write a universal Lisp function and show that it is a good thing too, or a lot of people.9 In Lisp, functions are a data type just like integers or strings. Investors looked at Yahoo's earnings and said to themselves, here is proof that Internet companies can make money. So your site has to say Wait! Not surprisingly, Gosling is right.10 Of our current concept of an organization work differently from the rest. It seems a fine plan to start students off with the list of n things protects the writer from his own stupidity in much the same way it protects the reader. And he could help them because he was one of the most valuable sort of fact you can get asymptotically close to the center of attention. It might be hard to translate that into another language, it will be an effort to drag yourself out.

Notes

None at all. If you want to wait for the first type, and their houses are transformed by developers into McMansions and sold to VPs of Bus Dev. Trevor Blackwell, who had to find it was more rebellion which can happen in any other field, and made more that year from stock options, of course finding words this way that makes it easier to say they were that smart they'd already be programming in Lisp, though it be in the U.

If there's an Indian grocery store near you, they may introduce startups they like the word I meant. Philosophy is like starting out in the definition of property is driven mostly by people trying to tell someone that I know for sure which these are, but they hate hypertension.

But those too are acceptable or at least should make the argument a little more fat, and spend hours arguing over irrelevant things. See Greenspun's Tenth Rule.

That's why the Apple I used thresholds of.

But it can have a three letter word.

For example, if you're a loser or possibly a winner, they mean. Later we added two more modules, an image generator and the editor written in C and C, the more educated ones. Prose lets you be more linear if all bugs are found quickly. I spent some time trying to make money from the DMV.

If PR didn't work out.

Which in turn forces Digg to respond with extreme countermeasures. Different kinds of menial work early in the production of high school is rounding error compared to what you learn via users anyway. This is why we can't figure out yet whether you'll succeed.

Even in Confucius's time it still seems to have to do as some European countries have done all they could then tell themselves that they were going back to the Pall Mall Gazette.

But people like them—people who have money to spend on trade goods to make money for other people think, but it is. And if they become so common that their explicit goal don't usually do a scatterplot with benevolence on the cover story of Business Week, 31 Jan 2005.

Thanks to Rich Draves, Robert Morris, and Lisa Randall for reading a previous draft.

[lanhubbs12639-blog]

Ways To End Brutality? Get Weapons Off Of The Road.

In very early December, President Obama gave out a purchase for the CIA to 'accomplish its own inspection' on the Russian story and also adjustment of the United States Governmental election in 6 weeks - straight around the actual day of Trump's launching on January TWENTY, 2017! That was built as a brand-new HQ for the Underground Electric Railways Business (UERL) of Greater london the sign from London Underground which still occupies the building today (they was because of relocate to new properties in the Olympic Playground in 2015 yet this still hasn't occurred at the moment from composing). Cianfrance possessed Gosling and Michelle cohabit in their rural Pennsylvania home with their onscreen daughter (Religion Wladyka) and viewed as they had a hard time the real stresses of having to discuss a washroom and also do the recipes three times a time. That is actually because, if our company make use of a long-lasting (Two Decade) marked down dividend design, with a 9.0% rebate rate (the blog post expense complete return of an S&P 500 ETF, since 1871 as well as therefore the chance cost of money), our company find that STAG reveals today are presently valuing in the REIT's tough likely growth. Pair of days later on Schepp introduced his objective to invest $2.5 million to create a groundwork blog-annahealth2017.fr for New york city kids between THIRTEEN as well as 16 years old that would certainly deliver all of them "along with methods to prepare themselves for beneficial jobs." The boys will be required to "vow themselves to do without bad habits, to follow the rules from the Condition and nation, and to become mindful in their therapy from others." If, after 2 years, they always kept the pledge, they will acquire $200 to be made use of to either begin a service or even finish their learnings. Hold up coming from the west edge of Princes Road is Grocers' Venue, house to The Grocers' Company, one more from the initial Twelve Wonderful Livery Companies and also happily stashed at no. 2 in the Order from Priority (correctly in a Nation from Shopkeepers"). ( above) Ward and also Salmonds Outfitters, West Street, Durban (Greater London Chambers Structure). REITs as an industry are actually normally reduced dryness, high-yield, possess constant returns growth, as well as are much smaller in dimension (market cap) compared to a lot of business in the S&P FIVE HUNDRED (normal market hat $92 billion). While the metropolitan area is best known around the United States for its own car sector and Motown reaches, its 673,000 individuals likewise understand it as a whiring facility for modern culture beyond the country's main coastal metropolises, with a background extending centuries that continuouslies taste each neighborhood as well as primary freeway. Girls in financial companies comprise 54% of the labor force, but just 16% from senior executives as well as none from the Chief executive officers, baseding on a review of the Bureau of Work Stats through Catalyst, a charitable whose objective is to extend opportunities for girls as well as company." In big banks, hedge funds, as well as many Exchange organizations, ladies compose most of employees in support functions including human resources, lawful and also conformity, administration, as well as customer service. Similar to every growing craft setting, Stokes Croft is ever before changing; once anonymous back alleys discover purpose, the colours spread to uncomfortable sections and though that's a wrench to discover old paintings changed, our experts are told from street fine art's inevitable truth - it's out of our management and also's why our experts like it. This crowd started out as the Historical Guild from Pepperers as far back as 1100 then in the 14th century established a brand new society from spice traders in the City from London which happened known as the Provider of Grossers. ( above) The department retail store Stuttafords, Section from West Street and also Gardiner Streets. Hillary, Expense as well as Chelsea (who partner is actually a mutual fund partner) feel that Wall Street is actually an important part of economic condition, comprised usually of extremely vivid, reputable as well as gifted individuals, like their classmates at Yale as well as Stanford.

[megadarkbouquettidalwavethings]

Here Come the Fake Videos, Too

The scene opened on a room with a red sofa, a potted plant and the kind of bland modern art you’d see on a therapist’s wall.

In the room was Michelle Obama, or someone who looked exactly like her. Wearing a low-cut top with a black bra visible underneath, she writhed lustily for the camera and flashed her unmistakable smile.

Then, the former first lady’s doppelgänger began to strip.

The video, which appeared on the online forum Reddit, was what’s known as a “deepfake” — an ultrarealistic fake video made with artificial intelligence software. It was created using a program called FakeApp, which superimposed Mrs. Obama’s face onto the body of a pornographic film actress. The hybrid was uncanny — if you didn’t know better, you might have thought it was really her.

Until recently, realistic computer-generated video was a laborious pursuit available only to big-budget Hollywood productions or cutting-edge researchers. Social media apps like Snapchat include some rudimentary face-morphing technology.

But in recent months, a community of hobbyists has begun experimenting with more powerful tools, including FakeApp — a program that was built by an anonymous developer using open-source software written by Google. FakeApp makes it free and relatively easy to create realistic face swaps and leave few traces of manipulation. Since a version of the app appeared on Reddit in January, it has been downloaded more than 120,000 times, according to its creator.

Deepfakes are one of the newest forms of digital media manipulation, and one of the most obviously mischief-prone. It’s not hard to imagine this technology’s being used to smear politicians, create counterfeit revenge porn or frame people for crimes. Lawmakers have already begun to worry about how deepfakes could be used for political sabotage and propaganda.

Even on morally lax sites like Reddit, deepfakes have raised eyebrows. Recently, FakeApp set off a panic after Motherboard, the technology site, reported that people were using it to create pornographic deepfakes of celebrities. Pornhub, Twitter and other sites quickly banned the videos, and Reddit closed a handful of deepfake groups, including one with nearly 100,000 members.

Before the Reddit deepfake groups were closed, they hosted a mixture of users trading video-editing tips and showing off their latest forgeries. A post titled “3D face reconstruction for additional angles” sat next to videos with titles like “(Not) Olivia Wilde playing with herself.”

Some users on Reddit defended deepfakes and blamed the media for overhyping their potential for harm. Others moved their videos to alternative platforms, rightly anticipating that Reddit would crack down under its rules against nonconsensual pornography. And a few expressed moral qualms about putting the technology into the world.

Then, they kept making more.

The deepfake creator community is now in the internet’s shadows. But while out in the open, it gave an unsettling peek into the future.

“This is turning into an episode of Black Mirror,” wrote one Reddit user. The post raised the ontological questions at the heart of the deepfake debate: Does a naked image of Person A become a naked image of Person B if Person B’s face is superimposed in a seamless and untraceable way? In a broader sense, on the internet, what is the difference between representation and reality?

The user then signed off with a shrug: “Godspeed rebels.”

Making Deepfakes

After lurking for several weeks in Reddit’s deepfake community, I decided to see how easy it was to create a (safe for work, nonpornographic) deepfake using my own face.

I started by downloading FakeApp and enlisting two technical experts to help me. The first was Mark McKeague, a colleague in The New York Times’s research and development department. The second was a deepfake creator I found through Reddit, who goes by the nickname Derpfakes.

Because of the controversial nature of deepfakes, Derpfakes would not give his or her real name. Derpfakes started posting deepfake videos on YouTube a few weeks ago, specializing in humorous offerings like Nicolas Cage playing Superman. The account has also posted some how-to videos on deepfake creation.

What I learned is that making a deepfake isn’t simple. But it’s not rocket science, either.

The first step is to find, or rent, a moderately powerful computer. FakeApp uses a suite of machine learning tools called TensorFlow, which was developed by Google’s A.I. division and released to the public in 2015. The software teaches itself to perform image-recognition tasks through trial and error. The more processing power on hand, the faster it works.

To get more speed, Mark and I used a remote server rented through Google Cloud Platform. It provided enough processing power to cut the time frame down to hours, rather than the days or weeks it might take on my laptop.

Once Mark set up the remote server and loaded FakeApp on it, we were on to the next step: data collection.

Picking the right source data is crucial. Short video clips are easier to manipulate than long clips, and scenes shot at a single angle produce better results than scenes with multiple angles. Genetics also help. The more the faces resemble each other, the better.

I’m a brown-haired white man with a short beard, so Mark and I decided to try several other brown-haired, stubbled white guys. We started with Ryan Gosling. (Aim high, right?) I also sent Derpfakes, my outsourced Reddit expert, several video options to choose from.

Next, we took several hundred photos of my face, and gathered images of Mr. Gosling’s face using a clip from a recent TV appearance. FakeApp uses these images to train the deep learning model and teach it to emulate our facial expressions.

To get the broadest photo set possible, I twisted my head at different angles, making as many different faces as I could.

Mark then used a program to crop those images down, isolating just our faces, and manually deleted any blurred or badly cropped photos. He then fed the frames into FakeApp. In all, we used 417 photos of me, and 1,113 of Mr. Gosling.

When the images were ready, Mark pressed “start” on FakeApp, and the training began. His computer screen filled with images of my face and Mr. Gosling’s face, as the program tried to identify patterns and similarities.

About eight hours later, after our model had been sufficiently trained, Mark used FakeApp to finish putting my face on Mr. Gosling’s body. The video was blurry and bizarre, and Mr. Gosling’s face occasionally flickered into view. Only the legally blind would mistake the person in the video for me.

We did better with a clip of Chris Pratt, the scruffy star of “Jurassic World,” whose face shape is a little more similar to mine. For this test, Mark used a bigger data set — 1,861 photos of me, 1,023 of him — and let the model run overnight.

A few days later, Derpfakes, who had also been training a model, sent me a finished deepfake made using the footage I had sent and a video of the actor Jake Gyllenhaal. This one was much more lifelike, a true hybrid that mixed my facial features with his hair, beard and body.

Derpfakes repeated the process with videos of Jimmy Kimmel and Liev Schreiber, both of which turned out well. As an experienced deepfake creator, Derpfakes had a more intuitive sense of which source videos would produce a clean result, and more experience with the subtle blending and tweaking that takes place at the end of the deepfake process.

In all, our deepfake experiment took three days and cost $85.96 in Google Cloud Platform credits. That seemed like a small price to pay for stardom.

What the App’s Creator Says

After the experiment, I reached out to the anonymous creator of FakeApp through an email address on its website. I wanted to know how it felt to create a cutting-edge A.I. tool, only to have it gleefully co-opted by ethically challenged pornographers.

A man wrote back, identifying himself as a software developer in Maryland. Like Derpfakes, the man would not give me his full name, and instead went by his first initial, N. He said he had created FakeApp as a creative experiment and was chagrined to see Reddit’s deepfake community use it for ill.

“I joined the community based around these algorithms when it was very small (less than 500 people),” he wrote, “and as soon as I saw the results I knew this was brilliant tech that should be accessible to anyone who wants to play around with it. I figured I’d take a shot at putting together an easy-to-use package to accomplish that.”

N. said he didn’t support the use of FakeApp to create nonconsensual pornography or other abusive content. And he said he agreed with Reddit’s decision to ban explicit deepfakes. But he defended the product.

“I’ve given it a lot of thought,” he said, “and ultimately I’ve decided I don’t think it’s right to condemn the technology itself — which can of course be used for many purposes, good and bad.”

FakeApp is somewhat finicky and hard to use, but it’s easy to imagine it improving quickly. N. said that in the future, FakeApp could be used by all kinds of people to bring high-budget special effects to their personal projects.

Deep learning algorithms, he added, were going to be important in the future, not only as stand-alone apps but as powerful components of many tech products.

“It’s precisely the things that make them so powerful and useful that make them so scary,” he said. “There’s really no limit to what you can apply it to with a little imagination.”

‘Next Form of Communication’

On the day of the school shooting last month in Parkland, Fla., a screenshot of a BuzzFeed News article, “Why We Need to Take Away White People’s Guns Now More Than Ever,” written by a reporter named Richie Horowitz, began making the rounds on social media.

The whole thing was fake. No BuzzFeed employee named Richie Horowitz exists, and no article with that title was ever published on the site. But the doctored image pulsed through right-wing outrage channels and was boosted by activists on Twitter. It wasn’t an A.I.-generated deepfake, or even a particularly sophisticated Photoshop job, but it did the trick.

Online misinformation, no matter how sleekly produced, spreads through a familiar process once it enters our social distribution channels. The hoax gets 50,000 shares, and the debunking an hour later gets 200. The carnival barker gets an algorithmic boost on services like Facebook and YouTube, while the expert screams into the void.

There’s no reason to believe that deepfake videos will operate any differently. People will share them when they’re ideologically convenient and dismiss them when they’re not. The dupes who fall for satirical stories from The Onion will be fooled by deepfakes, and the scrupulous people who care about the truth will find ways to detect and debunk them.

“There’s no choice,” said Hao Li, an assistant professor of computer science at the University of Southern California. Mr. Li, who is also the founder of Pinscreen, a company that uses artificial intelligence to create lifelike 3-D avatars, said the weaponization of A.I. was inevitable and would require a sudden shift in public awareness.

“I see this as the next form of communication,” he said. “I worry that people will use it to blackmail others, or do bad things. You have to educate people that this is possible.”

So, O.K. Here I am, telling you this: An A.I. program powerful enough to turn Michelle Obama into a pornography star, or transform a schlubby newspaper columnist into Jake Gyllenhaal, is in our midst. Manipulated video will soon become far more commonplace.

And there’s probably nothing we can do except try to bat the fakes down as they happen, pressure social media companies to fight misinformation aggressively, and trust our eyes a little less every day.

Godspeed, rebels.

Kevin Roose is a columnist for Business Day and a writer-at-large for The New York Times Magazine. His column, “The Shift,” examines the intersection of technology, business, and culture. @kevinrooseFacebook

A version of this article appears in print on , on Page A1 of the New York edition with the headline: It Was Only a Matter of Time: Here Comes an App for Fake Videos. Order Reprints | Today’s Paper | Subscribe

KEVIN ROOSE

The post Here Come the Fake Videos, Too appeared first on dailygate.

[hairterminator]

https://hair-terminator.com/11-mens-style-resolutions-for-year/

11 Men’s Style Resolutions For Year

January, then. It’s the least wonderful time of the year. The Christmas buzz is a long distant memory, your immune system has yet to clock in at work and the dent in your finances looks like an asteroid crater. But it’s also a time for good intentions, repair and renewal. As much as we’d like

January, then. It’s the least wonderful time of the year. The Christmas buzz is a long distant memory, your immune system has yet to clock in at work and the dent in your finances looks like an asteroid crater. But it’s also a time for good intentions, repair and renewal.

As much as we’d like to, we won’t cheerlead your gym endeavours. And if you’re doing veganuary, frankly we don’t want to speak to you. What we can offer, however, is our list of men’s style resolutions for the year ahead, which will help you become a better (dressed) person. No fad trends. Nothing to give you a willpower-cut. Just the rules you need to make 2018 the year of no more sartorial shortcomings.

Stock Check Your Basics

All good outlets require a regular stock check, and your wardrobe is no exception. Replenish the shelves with fresh, wholesome produce – the essential wardrobe basics you wear the most. Plain tees, dark jeans, grey sweatshirts, Oxford shirts and every other essential item of your menswear diet.

These pieces get the most wear, and are subject to the most tear. One yellowish T-shirt will push even the finest look past its sell-by date, so it makes perfect sense to refill the pantry as the year begins. It won’t cost you a fortune, either.

  Try A New Fit

If it’s not broke, don’t fix it – true enough if you’re of the Tom Ford one-look-fits-all school of thought. But as the old menswear ‘rules’ expand with every passing year, so too should your appetite to experiment. There’s never been a better time to refit your look – and we mean that literally.

Changing fit lets you change gears without throwing out your whole wardrobe. And, love them or hate them, wider legged trousers are becoming increasingly popular, refusing to budge from the trend wheel.

If baggy trousers sound like madness to you, consider a straight leg, or shapes that’ll play with your silhouette up top without making you look like a sack of potatoes. It’s all about knowing your body shape, what suits it, and the spots in your wardrobe that can accommodate some experimentation.

Consider A Proper Watch Upgrade

We’ve long argued that Switzerland isn’t the be all and end all of luxury watches. It’s not a bad place to start though, and you don’t always need a Swiss banker’s pay packet to get your hands on something mechanical and historic.

For a price tag just shy of the £500 mark, you can upgrade your wrist with a notable ticker from the likes of Hamilton, Christopher Ward or Tissot – all Swiss made, and all handsome in their own right.

If you want to look further afield, try Junghans from Germany or Seiko from Japan. Such labels aren’t quite Rolex material, but they’re not Rolex prices either. What they are is an excellent foundation for a fledgling watch collection.

  Invest In Something That Will Last

Your maths teacher was wrong: the Pythagorean theorem isn’t the most important equation in the textbook. That title belongs to the cost-per-wear ratio: the amount of money you spend on an item in relation to the amount of times you wear it. The more you wear it, the cheaper it is. Science.

Of course, you want the ratio to be as low as possible, but don’t think big price tags will always clinch it. It’s about making the right investment. A genuine leather jacket will get much more wear than a trend-based designer sweatshirt, as will a white cotton work shirt, some proper Goodyear-welted shoes, seasonless knitwear or a fine leather wallet.

Granted, it’ll seem like a low blow to your bank statement in the immediate future, but such a purchase will save in the long run. Remember: buy cheap, expect to buy twice.

Get To Know Your Barber

If your outfit’s a cut above, then the cut above it should be fit for purpose, too. A sharp, well-maintained hairstyle is down to one thing – regular visits to a barber your trust, who knows your hair well. So if you want to remain the stylish gent you no doubt are, increase the frequency of your visits. Become pals.

Most guys need some topiary up top around every two weeks, so block-book to get into the routine. Just as Wednesday may be leg day and Friday is designated date night, you can allocate the same time each month to some quality time with your other significant other.

Don’t think a balding head gets you off the hook, either. Men with sparser locks need even more attention than their fuller-maned brethren, as cuts adapted to thinning or receding hair can accentuate the problem if they’re left to overgrow.

Access Some Accessories

Accessories can be exactly that – accessories to crimes of fashion. There’s huge potential to turn into a human Buckaroo or just choose something really, really, ridiculously naff. As a result, men have become accessories-phobic and are all the more boring for it. If you get it wrong, you’re in danger of giving 2000s bling Beckham a run for his money, but get it right and you’re in peak Gosling style territory.

So, how to make sure that you plunder the style-enhancing merits of accessorising without veering perilously off track? Keep things simple and apply sparingly. When it comes to jewellery, once you’ve chucked on a necklace and a couple of rings you’ve maxed out your metal allowance. Other accessories should be treated with the same level of restraint, too. Wearing a cap, bum bag and sunglasses, for example, is only a good idea if you want to look like a textbook tourist.

Pick one or two accessories max, so that you don’t overdo it. We’d recommend going for minimal styles in colours that aren’t too in your face.

  Look After Your Skin

Your skin doesn’t get anything for Christmas. The booze, the cold and the endless supply of carbohydrates gifts you only flaking lips and a sallow complexion. But while you’ll need to act fast to stop dry (face) January in its tracks, a commitment to good skincare should be a year-round endeavour to maximise your chances of consistently looking your best.

Caring for your complexion isn’t just a case of throwing the bathroom cabinet at your mug. Be skin smart by chucking out any old products which are past their use by date and make sure the kit that you do have is fit for purpose. Go for grooming products specifically targeted for your age, lifestyle and skin type for maximum epidermal returns.

Make sure you treat your skincare seasonally too: right now you’ll need intensive, heady-duty products, but as the weather improves you should switch to lighter creams and lotions so you’re not extra oily. Our number one skin-saving resolution? SPF moisturiser every day.

Dress Better In The Gym

If you’re not a dedicated gym goer, chances are you’re begrudgingly toying with the idea as you attempt to consciously uncouple from your spare tyre. Ironically enough, for a place that is a mecca of physical self-improvement, there’s more style-killing clobber on display at the gym than you’ll find in an average episode of TOWIE. When you’re red in the face and dripping with sweat, the last thing you need is your wardrobe not spotting you.

Luckily, it’s pretty simple to correct dodgy gym attire. Step away from your bobbly old fleece and faded T-shirt and instead make sure you’re sweating in style – and kit that’s fit for purpose. You’ll find plenty of technical and wallet-friendly options on the high street, which actually fit and help you perform. Choose sweat-wicking fabrics and trainers that cushion your joints from the hammer blows of the treadmill.

  Look After Your Shoes

According to popular wisdom, the fastest route to killing your style is wearing bad shoes. And we’re not just talking about those blindingly awful square-toed ‘going out’ shoes. They’re unforgivable, but so are heel scuffs, scratches and marks that are better described as ‘patches’ than ‘patina’.

Unlike death and taxes, premature shoe ageing is far from certain with the right amount of TLC. Start with a regular polish of leather shoes each week. This doesn’t just bring the shine back, it also keeps the leather supple and increases its lifespan. Buy a suede brush and a suede protector to keep your softest shoes young, and don’t neglect your trainers, either. They may be your downtime pair but that’s no excuse for mud stains or grubby laces, which you should swap for new ones every few months.

Be More Colourful

In winter, most men’s wardrobes look the same as the sky, flitting between black and various shades of grey. We say it’s time for a brighter outlook.

If you’re chronically colour phobic, start with baby steps. A cobalt blue sweatshirt is a safe way to dip your toe into bolder hues but you’re still in sensible territory: it’s blue. Trainers are a minimal risk way to experiment with colour, too. A pastel pair worn with black or blue jeans are hard to get wrong and unlike wearing colour up top, you’ve got more freedom over which shade you choose.

If you’re more colour confident, get acquainted with tonal dressing this year (black, navy or grey don’t count FYI) and put coloured tailoring on your to-do list.

  Dry Clean Your Dinner Suit

The dinner suit is one of those items that you instantly forget exists the day after you’ve worn it. Unfortunately, that means if there’s any remains of said dinner on your lapel, it goes ignored in the wardrobe until your next wear, leading to last-minute panic sponging. Dry cleaning of your dinner suit will ensure that it stays in pristine condition when it goes into hibernation.

While we’re at it, here’s a general rule of thumb: a business suit should be dry cleaned no more than two-to-three times per year (any more will put unnecessary stress on the suit’s fibres) so a dinner suit, which we’re assuming you don’t have cause for wear on the regular, should be only dry cleaned once a year. Then, assuming you keep your other resolutions and actually go to the gym, you’ll be able to wear it for many years to come.

[fashiontrendin-blog]

11 Men’s Style Resolutions For Year

http://fashion-trendin.com/11-mens-style-resolutions-for-year/

11 Men’s Style Resolutions For Year

January, then. It’s the least wonderful time of the year. The Christmas buzz is a long distant memory, your immune system has yet to clock in at work and the dent in your finances looks like an asteroid crater. But it’s also a time for good intentions, repair and renewal.

As much as we’d like to, we won’t cheerlead your gym endeavours. And if you’re doing veganuary, frankly we don’t want to speak to you. What we can offer, however, is our list of men’s style resolutions for the year ahead, which will help you become a better (dressed) person. No fad trends. Nothing to give you a willpower-cut. Just the rules you need to make 2018 the year of no more sartorial shortcomings.

Stock Check Your Basics

All good outlets require a regular stock check, and your wardrobe is no exception. Replenish the shelves with fresh, wholesome produce – the essential wardrobe basics you wear the most. Plain tees, dark jeans, grey sweatshirts, Oxford shirts and every other essential item of your menswear diet.

These pieces get the most wear, and are subject to the most tear. One yellowish T-shirt will push even the finest look past its sell-by date, so it makes perfect sense to refill the pantry as the year begins. It won’t cost you a fortune, either.

Try A New Fit

If it’s not broke, don’t fix it – true enough if you’re of the Tom Ford one-look-fits-all school of thought. But as the old menswear ‘rules’ expand with every passing year, so too should your appetite to experiment. There’s never been a better time to refit your look – and we mean that literally.

Changing fit lets you change gears without throwing out your whole wardrobe. And, love them or hate them, wider legged trousers are becoming increasingly popular, refusing to budge from the trend wheel.

If baggy trousers sound like madness to you, consider a straight leg, or shapes that’ll play with your silhouette up top without making you look like a sack of potatoes. It’s all about knowing your body shape, what suits it, and the spots in your wardrobe that can accommodate some experimentation.

Consider A Proper Watch Upgrade

We’ve long argued that Switzerland isn’t the be all and end all of luxury watches. It’s not a bad place to start though, and you don’t always need a Swiss banker’s pay packet to get your hands on something mechanical and historic.

For a price tag just shy of the £500 mark, you can upgrade your wrist with a notable ticker from the likes of Hamilton, Christopher Ward or Tissot – all Swiss made, and all handsome in their own right.

If you want to look further afield, try Junghans from Germany or Seiko from Japan. Such labels aren’t quite Rolex material, but they’re not Rolex prices either. What they are is an excellent foundation for a fledgling watch collection.

Invest In Something That Will Last

Your maths teacher was wrong: the Pythagorean theorem isn’t the most important equation in the textbook. That title belongs to the cost-per-wear ratio: the amount of money you spend on an item in relation to the amount of times you wear it. The more you wear it, the cheaper it is. Science.

Of course, you want the ratio to be as low as possible, but don’t think big price tags will always clinch it. It’s about making the right investment. A genuine leather jacket will get much more wear than a trend-based designer sweatshirt, as will a white cotton work shirt, some proper Goodyear-welted shoes, seasonless knitwear or a fine leather wallet.

Granted, it’ll seem like a low blow to your bank statement in the immediate future, but such a purchase will save in the long run. Remember: buy cheap, expect to buy twice.

Get To Know Your Barber

If your outfit’s a cut above, then the cut above it should be fit for purpose, too. A sharp, well-maintained hairstyle is down to one thing – regular visits to a barber your trust, who knows your hair well. So if you want to remain the stylish gent you no doubt are, increase the frequency of your visits. Become pals.

Most guys need some topiary up top around every two weeks, so block-book to get into the routine. Just as Wednesday may be leg day and Friday is designated date night, you can allocate the same time each month to some quality time with your other significant other.

Don’t think a balding head gets you off the hook, either. Men with sparser locks need even more attention than their fuller-maned brethren, as cuts adapted to thinning or receding hair can accentuate the problem if they’re left to overgrow.

Access Some Accessories

Accessories can be exactly that – accessories to crimes of fashion. There’s huge potential to turn into a human Buckaroo or just choose something really, really, ridiculously naff. As a result, men have become accessories-phobic and are all the more boring for it. If you get it wrong, you’re in danger of giving 2000s bling Beckham a run for his money, but get it right and you’re in peak Gosling style territory.

So, how to make sure that you plunder the style-enhancing merits of accessorising without veering perilously off track? Keep things simple and apply sparingly. When it comes to jewellery, once you’ve chucked on a necklace and a couple of rings you’ve maxed out your metal allowance. Other accessories should be treated with the same level of restraint, too. Wearing a cap, bum bag and sunglasses, for example, is only a good idea if you want to look like a textbook tourist.

Pick one or two accessories max, so that you don’t overdo it. We’d recommend going for minimal styles in colours that aren’t too in your face.

Look After Your Skin

Your skin doesn’t get anything for Christmas. The booze, the cold and the endless supply of carbohydrates gifts you only flaking lips and a sallow complexion. But while you’ll need to act fast to stop dry (face) January in its tracks, a commitment to good skincare should be a year-round endeavour to maximise your chances of consistently looking your best.

Caring for your complexion isn’t just a case of throwing the bathroom cabinet at your mug. Be skin smart by chucking out any old products which are past their use by date and make sure the kit that you do have is fit for purpose. Go for grooming products specifically targeted for your age, lifestyle and skin type for maximum epidermal returns.

Make sure you treat your skincare seasonally too: right now you’ll need intensive, heady-duty products, but as the weather improves you should switch to lighter creams and lotions so you’re not extra oily. Our number one skin-saving resolution? SPF moisturiser every day.

Dress Better In The Gym

If you’re not a dedicated gym goer, chances are you’re begrudgingly toying with the idea as you attempt to consciously uncouple from your spare tyre. Ironically enough, for a place that is a mecca of physical self-improvement, there’s more style-killing clobber on display at the gym than you’ll find in an average episode of TOWIE. When you’re red in the face and dripping with sweat, the last thing you need is your wardrobe not spotting you.

Luckily, it’s pretty simple to correct dodgy gym attire. Step away from your bobbly old fleece and faded T-shirt and instead make sure you’re sweating in style – and kit that’s fit for purpose. You’ll find plenty of technical and wallet-friendly options on the high street, which actually fit and help you perform. Choose sweat-wicking fabrics and trainers that cushion your joints from the hammer blows of the treadmill.

Look After Your Shoes

According to popular wisdom, the fastest route to killing your style is wearing bad shoes. And we’re not just talking about those blindingly awful square-toed ‘going out’ shoes. They’re unforgivable, but so are heel scuffs, scratches and marks that are better described as ‘patches’ than ‘patina’.

Unlike death and taxes, premature shoe ageing is far from certain with the right amount of TLC. Start with a regular polish of leather shoes each week. This doesn’t just bring the shine back, it also keeps the leather supple and increases its lifespan. Buy a suede brush and a suede protector to keep your softest shoes young, and don’t neglect your trainers, either. They may be your downtime pair but that’s no excuse for mud stains or grubby laces, which you should swap for new ones every few months.

Be More Colourful

In winter, most men’s wardrobes look the same as the sky, flitting between black and various shades of grey. We say it’s time for a brighter outlook.

If you’re chronically colour phobic, start with baby steps. A cobalt blue sweatshirt is a safe way to dip your toe into bolder hues but you’re still in sensible territory: it’s blue. Trainers are a minimal risk way to experiment with colour, too. A pastel pair worn with black or blue jeans are hard to get wrong and unlike wearing colour up top, you’ve got more freedom over which shade you choose.

If you’re more colour confident, get acquainted with tonal dressing this year (black, navy or grey don’t count FYI) and put coloured tailoring on your to-do list.

Dry Clean Your Dinner Suit

The dinner suit is one of those items that you instantly forget exists the day after you’ve worn it. Unfortunately, that means if there’s any remains of said dinner on your lapel, it goes ignored in the wardrobe until your next wear, leading to last-minute panic sponging. Dry cleaning of your dinner suit will ensure that it stays in pristine condition when it goes into hibernation.

While we’re at it, here’s a general rule of thumb: a business suit should be dry cleaned no more than two-to-three times per year (any more will put unnecessary stress on the suit’s fibres) so a dinner suit, which we’re assuming you don’t have cause for wear on the regular, should be only dry cleaned once a year. Then, assuming you keep your other resolutions and actually go to the gym, you’ll be able to wear it for many years to come.

[goosewriting]

⭐ Masterlist: Rise of the TMNT

→ please check the request status & rules in my pinned post before requesting!

• last updated: sep 25, 2024

🌸 : fluff ⚡️ : angst 🥀 : angst & comfort 🎉 : 500 sub event (drabbles) (# 500 goslings event)

🔵 Leonardo (# rotmnt leo x reader)

⚡️one last chance: after sending Casey through the portal back in time, Leo ends up accidentally falling through it as well ↳ Navigation: Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3

⚡️ you, me and the apocalypse: after Cassandra’s death, reader is left with a kid to take care of

🥀 blorbos and unresolved feelings: reader is sad after their favourite character died in their show

🥀 when he was gone: reader sees Leo stay back in the prison dimension as the portal closes and thinks he’s gone for good

🌸 baskets and bruises: reader gets surprisingly competitive in a basketball match with the turtles

🎉🌸 destiny: Leo saves reader from a creep and they start talking

🎉🌸 when in doubt, use a one-liner: even after being flung through the air, reader still has jokes; Leo is not amused

🎉🌸 in your arms: falling asleep on opposite sides of the bed and waking up in each other’s arms

🎉🌸 when realisation hits you (literally): Leo confesses to reader after a tiring day

🎉🥀 prove them wrong: the turtles find out reader is Big Mama’s kid

🌸 stripes: reader is insecure about their stretch marks and Leo comforts them with smooches

🎉🌸 worth the trouble: reader gets into a fight for a rare figurine and arrives all scratched up at the lair

🎉⚡ run away: Leo has to leave reader behind when fighting a monster

🥀 falling for you: reader falls into the rottmnt world and comes across the turtle brothers ↳ Navigation: Part 1 | Part 2

🌸 be my valentine: the turtles set a plan in motion so Leo can ask out reader on valentine’s day

🔷 Future Leonardo (# future leo x reader)

peepaw date: date night with future!Leo where you both have a lil too much wine

🔴 Raphael (# rottmnt raph x reader)

🎉🌸 ferris wheel: good ol' ferris wheel trope that ends in a smooch

🎉🥀 please stay: reader is having a bad day and falls asleep on Raph’s shoulder

🎉🥀 don't go: reader is about to go on a date, but Raph stops them

🎉🌸 in love with you: Raph ends up staying the night at reader’s place and confessing

🎉🌸 partners in crime: Raph helps reader steal a jewel; turns out it was a gift for him

🎉🌸 a very special mission: Raph gets a crush on reader and April sets up a meeting

🟠 Michelangelo (# rottmnt mikey x reader)

🎉🌸 stolen glances: reader discovers Mikey’s drawings of them

🎉🌸 caught in the rain: Mikey grabs reader’s hand to escape the rain

🎉🌸 fake it till you make it: a stranger makes reader uncomfortable, so Mikey intervenes by saying he’s the boyfriend

🎉🌸 vanilla extract: Mikey and reader bake cookies together, but reader is really bad at it

🎉⚡ if i never see you again: reader got captured by Big Mama; Mikey gets to see you one last time

🟣 Donatello (# rottmnt donnie x reader)

🌸 sing like no one’s watching: Donnie catches reader singing the library song

🎉🥀 finding you: Donnie visits reader after they get rescued from being kidnapped

🎉🌸 i see you: reader wants to impress Donnie, which leads to a confession

🎉🌸 storms and sleepovers: Donnie offers to braid reader’s hair after he sleeps over because of a storm

🎉🥀 oh, the irony: Donnie finally understands why he doesn’t want you to go on a date with someone else

🎉🥀 protect you: reader shields Donnie with their body to protect him

🎉⚡ almost gone: Donnie remembers how readily you would have sacrificed yourself for him

🎉🌸 drunk on your love: reader gets back to the lair drunk and ends up confessing to Donnie

🎉🌸 worth the trouble: reader gets into a fight for a rare figurine and arrives all scratched up at the lair

🐢 All 4 x reader (separate) (tagged with all four)

🌸 my name looks good on you: reader gifts turtle a bracelet with their name on it

🌸 just a little tipsy, i swear: reader gets drunk and clingy

🌸 taking the lead: first kiss with the turtles

🥀 bad day, like, the worst: turtles comfort reader after a really bad day

🌸 i couldn’t help but notice you’re staring: the turtles keep catching a stranger stealing glances at them all night

🌸 baby: (# the turtle baby saga) turtle babies suddenly appear in the lair, and they look suspiciously a lot like your turtle bf ↳ Versions: Leo | Raph | Donnie | Mikey

🥀 ace of spades: reader is asexual and is confronted with some questions/situations

🌸 unexpected presents: reader can't help but tear up/cry when receiving a gift from their turtle boyfriend

🌸 my eyes are up here: headcanons for the turtles with a very tall reader

🌸 by your side: reader is in awe and mushy about being the turtle’s S/O

🌸 prom night, plan B: reader got stood up for prom and goes to the lair instead, looking extremely fly

🌸 rooftops and confessions: reader overhears turtle talking to April about his crush on them