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mnnuni · 27 days ago

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Run like a girl

Elliot Stabler x reader

Summary: Reader is Elliot's new girlfriend, with a dark past and some difficiulties with his daughter Kathleen. They find themselfs in a bad situations but everything works out in the end

Words: 4130

Warnings: kidnapping, violent boyfriends, drowing, little mention of blood, lots of worries and fears,brief mention of drugs, "run like a girl" theme

Author's note: i am not completly happy with this but it had to be published, maybe i could have developed some things better but it's out now. Feel free to critic, as long as it's constructive

*dividers from @saradika-graphics

*requested by and cowritten with @eminelul

By working in a gym it was natural to see fit men all day everyday, even more when the gym is directly across from a police district and almost every policeman and woman goes to it after or before work.

A very good motivation to get up everything, should we say.

The cherry on top came when detective Elliot Stabler joined the group. The most handsome man that ever crossed your vision, who smiled at you since the first time he entered the gym and keeps doing it every day.

The day one of his coworkers noticed you were staring -evidently for too long- at him and not at the machine he came to you and said “you know he’s been divorced for a while, you could ask him out instead of drool from afar”. Now, Finn was always straightforward and funny, actually, you grew a sympathy for him but that was madness : you could never ask Elliot out, you barely talked to him aside from stupid niceties and things about his gym subscription.

It took him three months of longing stares and stupid conversation to finally approach you, “I really hope what I'm about to say isn’t gonna be inappropriate, and if it’ll be I’m sorry…” he seemed so nervous, “would you like to grab a coffee?”

You don’t remember your answer, nor what you talked about over that coffee, you could just say that was the first of many more.

It all seemed so natural with Elliot: talking about your days, ordering for each other at lunches, walking under one umbrella in the rain and so and so. The difficult things started when Elliot wanted to take things to the next level in your relationship and felt terrible for even initiating it with your age difference; it wasn’t that much, just four years -he always had to specify they were four and a half- and just for this it took him another three months just to kiss you.

It was the best kiss you ever had though. It happened casually, you were watching a movie at his apartment, you were braced on his side -the most contact you had up until that moment- and were so focused on the TV that you didn’t notice Elliott watching just you, getting closer by the second. At that moment, Elliot could only admire the light on the TV on your face and how it made your freckles pop and your lips appear more pink. He moved your face with his fingers and directed to him and put his lips to yours; he kissed you slowly, gently, with purpose, as to be sure you wanted it as much as he wanted it. When you finally realised everything and put more passion to it your worlds finally started to move together.

Everything was going so well he actually decided to have you meet his family.

When the day finally came you couldn’t be more nervous, you changed dress three times and called Elliot to convince him you weren’t ready five and a half times -the last went to voicemail because he was already in the car to come and pick you up-

Turns out that Kathy was lovely and so were their kids, lunch was super nice. Except for the oldest one, Kathleen, who tried to ignore you at first and then throwing nasty comments your way every now and then -just how every teenager would do if their father introduced them to his new and young girlfriend, you would say to yourself-

Nevertheless her sympathy for you, you were part of her father’s life now so she had to tolerate you sometimes.

The first time Kathleen was to stay at Elliot’s when you were there she was driven off by some guy, he looked older than her and so much more inclined to use tongue in a kiss than Kathleen was. You really tried not to overstep, but as a woman -more specifically a woman who suffered- you couldn’t get this go and so you asked her about it, “Says the one who sleeps with my father” was the simplest of the many things Kathleen said to you so you decided to let it go for the time.

About a week later you were woken up by your phone, the most shocking part was Kathleen’s name on the screen : “Can you pick me up? I’m at one of Jake’s friends ’house”

You were on your feet in an instant.

When you arrived at the address she sent you, you found one of the loudest and crowded parties you’d seen in quite some time, but your only worry was Kathleen and her safety. Someone directed you to the backyard where you found Kathleen, visibly uncomfortable, sitting on the back of a car and surrounded by Jake and his friends, smoking and drinking. She ran to you immediately, “thank you, I couldn’t call mom or dad and you were the first one I could think of”

Oh.

“Don’t worry sweetheart, let’s get home now”

Being accommodating was the right thing to do, right?

Apparently it was working because she gladly took your arm and started following, just before one stupid tall guy stopped in front of you “nahh don’t just leave yet” and then another next to him “yeah, the party’s just started”

You tried to wriggle out of them “thank you guys, but we really need to go”. It all lasted two minutes of phrases of persuasion before a gunshot was heard. Kathleen flinched next to you.

It was Jake who had shot in the air, a warning. “Now you shut up and come with us”

Now, you shouldn't have been surprised : Kathleen’s voice was trembling on the phone and her eagerness to leave right that moment was only another proof that you had got right the first time, Jake was nothing a person would want near them.

The drive was painfully scary, you didn't know what to do or what to say; you had only two things in mind : protect Kathleen and stay alive.

Your worries only increased when you understood that Jake was driving towards the woods and in that moment you decided it was time to do something, as dangerous as you knew it was, you had to do it.

You squeezed Kathleen’s hand and made sure she knew that whatever was going to happen you’d be okay, “when I look at you, run faster than you ever did” she took a deep breath and nodded.

Jake was so distracted by driving and imagining what he would have done to you that he noticed you opening the door and jumping out just because you were loud about it.

Jake abruptly stopped the car and immediately got out to get you, you got up from the road and waited.

It wasn't the first time you'd be in a rough situation with a guy, so you thought you were prepared… how wrong you were.

When he stopped in front of you, red in the face, a furious look in his eyes, you searched for Kathleen's eyes and finally nodded. She was hesitant at first, but when she saw you ran in the opposite direction she finally got out and ran herself.

Your legs were moving without you could gather anything, all you could concentrate on was the fact that you couldn’t let him reach you, not this time, not again.

Flashback from a past you thought were buried passed in front of you and you feared you were about to give up.

You knew you couldn’t run much, he was stronger and faster, but you kept moving nevertheless.

You were out of breath and panting but nothing mattered.

You dared to look behind you for a moment and had to do a double look because Jake was gone.

Jake was gone?

You couldn’t answer your thoughts because you were knocked out from behind. Your knees gave out and your hand reached behind your head in automatic.

It was wet, red.

Jake stood over you with a rock in his hand and a devious smile.

“You thought you could escape? Oh I'm gonna destroy you”

That was it.

You had to fight for real now.

Jake threw you on his shoulders and started walking; you were left to wonder, analyzing the space around you so you would have been prepared for anything. You couldn't see much but from the smell and the sound Jake's shoes made you were nearing water.

“You think you’re so smart, don't you?”

He put you down

“I'm gonna show you how smart you could have been”

He started to unbuckle his belt, threatening you.

Your head was hurting so much more now, guessing what was about to happen to you. He got closer to you and took your legs in his hands, tying them together with his belt.

He moved on top of you to reach your face and whisper “no one's gonna find you here, bitch.”

That was the last thing you saw before he threw you in the water.

While you sank deeper and deeper in the lake you thought about Kathleen, hoping she was safe now, in the arms of her father.

You thought about Elliot, how worried he must have been, how many officers he would have put on the move if he knew.

You counted every second you hold your breath underwater, your record was of three and a half minutes. You could do more, right?

When you started to see Elliot underwater, reaching to you, you were sure you were about to pass out but you wouldn’t. You didn't go through all that just to die.

You slowly made your way to the surface, finally breathing again.

No one was around.

It took you way too much time to finally arrive near the city again and call Elliot from a gas station.

You were safe.

The following days passed as if they lasted an eternity and the aftermath of everything that had happened felt like a suffocating presence that clung to every glance, every hesitation, and every word spoken in the house.

The walls seemed to echo with the weight of unspoken tension, and even the smallest movements felt charged with a lingering sense of dread. Conversations stumbled, awkward and strained, as if the very air around them held the ghosts of what had happened, refusing to let go.

You weren't the one that felt this pressure the most - for you it was a familiar feeling. You were already used the worried looks, the glances that lingered way too long on your bruised skin and the whispered silences that followed your every step, as if they all feared what might spill out if they spoke too loud. But all of that would pass eventually, you already got over it once. In your eyes, Kathleen was the one most shattered by what had happened. Guilt weighed her down, an invisible burden that you could see in every fleeting glance Kathleen stole in the mornings, in the way her voice softened, almost trembling, whenever they exchanged those awkward, forced words that used to be so simple.

So as you decided that night that she would have lived, now it was time to make her surviving a good thing and not a bad memory.

"Morning!” you said as you heard Kathleen entering the kitchen, you invited her to sit and offered a mug.

“Your dad got an early call this morning so it’s just us for now. Are you hungry?”

“I think I’ll pass. But thank you” Kathleen murmured before forcing her lips into a painful smile. You sighed as you poured coffee in the mugs. “Coffee sounds good, though”, she adds, finally sitting down at the table.

As you looked at her you couldn’t help but notice her dark circles, which made her remember every time she heard the cries coming from her bedroom whenever she would find herself laying awake at night.

Kathleen looked lost, her gestures slow as if she was dreading moving at all.

You understood how it affected her but she never would’ve wanted her to feel guilty.

“Are you up for a little walk?” you found yourself asking, knowing full well that you had to do something about it and you had to do it now.

Kathleen looked at you and then glanced out the window.

“Sure. But I can’t stay too long. “ Her response took you by surprise, which made her smile almost immediately. “I need to finish a project I’ve been procrastinating on”, she adds after taking a sip from the coffee mug.

“I’ll go get dressed. This is already my second coffee this morning anyway” you chuckled before getting up

“Are we leaving town?!” Kathleen asked, her face showing confusion as she glanced at the street sign.

“Yeah. I need to show you something” you replied, your voice calm, yet reassuring. “Don’t worry, I already texted your dad about it…and you’ll be back just in time to finish your project. It’s worth it. I promise” you add, glancing over at Kathleen, a soft smile tugging at the corner of your lips, as if to ease the confusion in her eyes.

The next twenty, maybe thirty minutes felt awkward although the radio was on and you hummed to the songs silently. None of you knew what to say other than the occasional it’s so crowded today - and you both had your reasons.

It took a moment for Kathleen to realize you had parked across from a cemetery, and her confusion only deepened. This time, she didn’t ask any questions, she simply followed you out of the car and toward the gates, hands tucked into her sweater pockets—not because she was cold, but because she didn’t quite know what to feel.

You two walked for a few minutes until you stopped in front of a headstone that read “Here lies Daniel Moretti. May he find in death what he never found in life.”

You took a deep breath as you kneeled down, looking at the engraved words with a weighted gaze on your face.

“Why are we here? Who’s this?” Kathleen broke the silence, her tone being as unsure as her words were. She didn’t want to come off as nosy, but she was curious.

“This…” you hesitated, taking another breath before continuing your sentence “This is my ex fiancée.”

You almost choked on your own words as you closed your eyes, not being able to face what’s in front of you.

“I - uh, sorry. I don’t really understand why would you bring me here” Kathleen replied, her voice catching slightly on the last word.

Knowing what she was referring to, you got right back on her feet, this time facing Kathleen, “Because I’ve seen myself in you right when you walked through that door with your boyfriend”.

You paused for a moment, not sure how to word your thoughts.

“I saw it in you—the way you flinched when he raised his voice, the way you tried to laugh it off, the way you made yourself small so he wouldn’t notice you weren’t happy. And I remembered what it felt like. The exhaustion. The humiliation. But most of all, the fear” you added, looking right into Kathleen’s eyes. You noticed how her eyes grew wider and how she bit the inside of her cheek to prevent herself from crying. That’s why she tried to keep her voice as calm as possible, although she wanted to scream the words so loud that her lungs would feel like they were on fire.

“It wasn’t like that, he -…” Kathleen tried to reply, instinctively covering for the man who put them both through hell. “I just…I don’t know how to process all of this. I thought I was smarter than this, that I could see the signs. I should’ve seen the signs.” she gasped for air as the realization sank in, leaving her breathless. “I grew up around them. How did I manage to miss them?”

“No. Don’t you even dare blaming yourself for this. It only takes one man, Kathleen. And the worst part? He doesn’t have to be a stranger lurking in the dark. He can be someone you trust. Someone who calls you ‘baby’ while tightening his grip. Someone who tells you he loves you while making sure you know there’s no way out.”

You then took Kathleen’s hands into yours, leaving a deep sigh out before looking right back into her eyes, “It’s not your fault for not seeing the signs. It’s that awful, creeping voice in our head whispering that maybe this was just how it was supposed to be. But it’s not. It never is.”

You watched as Kathleen shut her eyes closed, finally letting her emotions show as tears fell down her face. It was only a matter of seconds before she dried up her cheeks, looking straight to the headstone next to you. “Is this why you brought me here? Did he…Did he do the same things to you?” she asked hesitantly, not knowing if it was appropriate to ask this directly.

“The same things and then some more” you laughed it off but it was clear as day that your laugh hid pain that maybe nobody in Kathleen’s family knew about. “Sometimes, when the memories come rushing back, I find myself coming back to his grave. Just to make sure, you know? Just to see the dirt, packed down and untouched. Needing to see for myself that the nightmare is buried six feet under” the words fell through your lips while she stared at the dirt beneath your feet.

“Does it help?" Kathleen finds herself asking, her question feeling almost hopeful that the response would be an affirmative one.

“Yes. It does. At least for a while. But the nightmare is never over, right? The memories are still there, haunting me, grinning with their sharp teeth at me and waiting for the best moment to catch me with my guard down.” You knew that you couldn’t sugarcoat the truth, It wouldn’t be fair. You could feel Kathleen’s disappointment as you finished speaking but you thought that it was better than twisting the reality.

You needed to get that out of your chest, not being able to let Kathleen take the blame for what her boyfriend did to you.

“We met at a party back when I was in college. At first, he was sweet, caring - the poster child for a loving boyfriend, the kind you only hear about in fairytales, not even movies. It didn’t take a look, though. He consistently acted this way just enough for me to get attached - too attached”, you continued and watched Kathleen look at you, her expression filled with something that made you realise that the way their stories wasn’t much different.

“Right after he had me where he wanted, he changed. I wasn’t allowed to go to college, talk to my friends - even my family. He completely shut me off from the world and had me thinking that I didn't need anyone but him” you swallowed hard as you spoke, trying to force down the lump that was already forming in your throat. “He judged me over and over again, belittled me to the point where I started questioning my worth. Somehow, this was worse than the beating and everything else that he put me through because this was his way of making me stay with him.” your jaw clenched as you let the last sentence leave you lips and then inhaled deeply before giving Kathleen a soft smile.

“But- you left, didn’t you? Or did you…” Kathleen asked as she pointed to the grave, not knowing how to word the question.

“Oh!” you laugh, only this time it was actually a genuine laugh “No, although sometimes I wish I did. He died in a car crash almost two years ago. And yes, I left. Eventually. He was an addict and started making me take the drugs he used to take so that we would get high together” as you remembered that part of the story, you cringed and shook your head. “I only did it two times because I thought that it would ease how I felt but it only made everything worse. So I kept faking it. He would always up the dosage so he never caught on. That’s how I escaped. I left as soon as I saw him drift away from reality.”

“That was brave, you know? I don’t know if…if I could do it if I were you. Did he ever find you?” Kathleen said as she was looking down, digging a boot into the dirt, as if she was trying to ground herself.

“No. I left this city without telling anyone. I got on the first bus and got off here. I eventually told my family about it and they understood. They just… They were relieved that I was even alive” you answered softly while staring again at the gravestone with a hollow expression, lost in thought.

For what seemed like an eternity, none of you said a word. It was a lot to process and maybe you haven't reached half of what happened to you.

“I’m really sorry for what happened to you. I never wanted this to happen. If I had known that you wanted to stay behind, I would’ve never left you alone with him” Kathleen eventually broke the silence, her words being full of pain and regret.

“I should’ve never left you alone with him. You almost died because of me!” she cried, not being able to hold herself together anymore. You immediately pulled her in your arms and stroked her back with your palm. “Sweetheart, stop it. Stop blaming yourself. The thought of this being your fault never even crossed my mind, alright?” you spoke calmly as Kathleen kept sobbing in your arms.

“How could I not blame myself? You almost died trying to protect me from something that was meant to happen to me” her words stung you in ways you couldn’t even comprehend which made you bring Kathleen even closer, as if you were trying to shield her from all this pain.

“I would do this a hundred times over for you. I would run into that dark again. Don’t you dare apologise. And don’t you dare feel guilty.” you spoke firmly, letting Kathleen go before cupping her face into yout palms. “And do you want to know why?”

Kathleen nodded, unable to use anything other than some small gestures.

You could feel that, that pain and you had enough of seeing her like this. Kathleen never deserved to feel like this.

“I would do all of this all over again because it means that you won’t have to. That’s all that matters to me. You’re safe”, you gently dried the tears of Kathleen’s face and smiled at her as soon as you felt her gaze softening.

“And I never regretted anything less I’m my life. That’s why I brought you here. I wanted to remind you that you’re safe and that he can’t hurt you anymore.”

“Thank you. I guess I never realised how much I needed this” Kathleen says and she then lets out a deep, shaky sigh, releasing the last bit of tension.

Back in the car, there was some sense of relief for both of you. Of course, everything that had happened still felt heavy on your minds, but it wasn’t like you could do anything about it other than trying to move forward. It couldn’t be erased and most definitely, nobody could act as if it never happened.

You pushed the radio button and turned up the volume, then looked at the passenger’s seat, where Kathleen was and smiled as the next song played.

“Can I ask you something?” she asked softly, still trying to process the whole conversation that you had at the cemetery.

“You can ask me anything. Unless it involves math. I never liked it” you laugh, trying to make Kathleen feel more comfortable given the circumstances.

“Do you feel safe now that you’re here? With us?” her look turns at you, studying your face as she waits for an answer.

“You have no idea” you assured her, taking her hand from the setting wheel for a few seconds so that you could stroke Kathleen’s shoulder.

“This is the safest I’ve ever felt” you add, seeing the worry fade from Kathleen’s face.

“So, what’s your project about?”

#elliot stabler x you #elliot stabler fanfic #elliot stabler #law and order svu #run like a girl #request #co writing #law and order special victims unit #law and order fanfiction #law and order imagine

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