#30 day soa challenge

[garbinge]

Secret's Safe

Jax Teller x Ortiz!F!Reader Juice & Sister!Reader 30 Day Fic Challenge

Word Count: 3k A/N: I had more thoughts to make this more of a Juice fic but then.... Jax LOL.

Warnings: All my fics are 18+ regardless of content. Mentions of blood, murder, death, assault, secrets, lying, trauma, abuse.

Word Count: 3k SOA Taglist: @drabbles-mc @justreblogginfics

As you opened your eyes, they squinted quickly as the bright sun hit them immediately.  After blinking a few times, they tried to take in your surroundings. You were in the passenger seat of your car, the green signs on the highway were moving extremely quickly past you. It took you a minute to focus to see what was on the signs but soon enough you caught one that said Stockton 75 miles. That meant you weren’t too far off from where you were headed before you ran into the person at the wheel of your truck currently. That thought made you immediately snap your head over to see the blond haired man, hand on the steering wheel, white knuckled, his reaper hat holding back the oiled hair from the sleepless night prior. 

“You look like shit.” You spoke up, clearing your throat as you did, placing his jacket that he had draped over you on his backpack. 

It was the statement he had said to you when you ran into him at the truck stop last night. It was meant to be humorous but once he got a good look at you, he realized it held way more truth than he expected. The genuine concern is what brought him to load his Harley in the bed of your truck, and continue your drive out to Charming for you. 

Staring at the smile growing on his face sent you back to the days you were falling in love with Jax Teller. Back when he had the kutte without the weight of the office patches. 

“Didn’t want you to feel left out.” His voice sent a shiver through your body. It had been half a decade since you last saw him. It made you look him over more closely. His hair was longer, Jax always sported the long blonde look but this was a lot more lengthy than before, like something had happened that led him to forget to get it cut. As you looked at his beard, you thought maybe that was more the sign that things hadn’t exactly been smooth sailing for him. Your eyes moved down to his kutte, despite being new to you, the vice president patch on his right was dirty and worn. 

“You think we could stop somewhere for me to freshen up, I don’t really want to jump scare my brother.” You started to look through your backpack for your toiletries as you spoke. 

“Was planning to go to my place first, I know how you are with him.” His knuckles tightened on the wheel as the sentence left his mouth.  

You weren’t sure whether you were annoyed or comforted by his statement. You knew exactly what he meant, and it was unreal to you that despite the insanity of this situation, you could still fight about the same things you fought about then. 

“And how am I with him?” It was said in a way that you both knew the answer, but you wanted Jax to humor you, or maybe you just wanted to finally win this fight. You stopped your search for whatever in your bag and looked at him, eyebrows raised waiting for an answer. 

“Cautious.” He spoke the word immediately and you felt the argument practically line up in your voice like it was muscle memory. 

Keeping your relationship a secret was ultimately what broke you both up. And that’s what made you move back to the east coast where you and your brother grew up. 

Jax followed up his statement quickly before you could let out a syllable of your argument. “For the record, I get it now. I think I was still a stupid young kid wanting to flaunt my girlfriend around.” 

This was completely new to you. 

You looked him over again and despite the distressed look to it, you caught the fresh stitching. The patch was not only new to you but new to him as well. 

“I guess being the second in command makes you mature.” 

“Makes you see what people can handle, too.” His voice was firm as he spoke, eyes still on the road. 

“He wouldn’t have been able to handle it.” You agreed knowing your brother well. He was fun-loving, caring, hilarious, but he had demons. And if anyone else’s found their way to him, you knew it’d break him because he’d try so hard to take them on his own. Not saying Jax and your relationship was bad, it was surprisingly one of the better ones you’d been in, but you knew by having that, you’d be taking away the one thing that kept your brother stable. 

“He gonna be able to handle what brought you out here?” 

That snapped you out of your thoughts. Your eyes said it all but he didn’t even need to be looking at them to feel your shock and need for explanation. 

“I saw the blood in the bed of your truck when I was loading my bike. Thought I’d taught you better than to leave behind evidence.” 

“That’s mine.” It was so pointed how you said it. 

That made Jax’s brow arch in curiosity. As fucked up as it sounded, it was relieving to you to be talking to someone who wasn’t shocked by the possibility of mysterious blood or being on the lam from a crime. To be talking to someone who almost found curiosity in the thought of the situation. 

“I got mixed up with this group of friends out east.” He didn’t need to pry the information out of you, this was never an issue between you, sharing your thoughts with each other, talking through everything, was never the problem. Telling other people was. “Real party kids, you know, we were drinking, doing drugs, having a good time, until we weren’t.” You took a deep breath before getting into the depths of the story. 

“We were hanging out on the front porch of someone’s house, it was late, or early, however you wanna describe it, and someone rolled up, I guess someone brought a friend who knew some not so great people.” 

Jax had a feeling he knew where the story was going but he wanted to hear it from your account.

“I got stabbed.” This part of the story was so straight to the point compared to the rest. The context here didn’t matter much compared to the lead up. 

“Still missing the part where you got blood in your truck.” Jax was only saying this because you stopped talking and he knew there were pieces of the story missing. 

This was where it was hard to say what happened, partially because you couldn’t believe how stupid you were to let this happen to begin with, but also since it was traumatic. 

“They tossed me in the bed of the truck and left me there to die.” 

Jax’s grip got tighter against the wheel and he sucked his lips into his teeth, the anger rising as he thought about it. 

“Obviously I didn’t.” You tried to lighten the mood. 

“And you decided to come back here.” Jax nodded, fully understanding the story. 

“After I killed the person who left me to die. Who just happened to be the one who stabbed me.” Again, the words came out with no lead up, just the point. 

Jax’s eyes darted to you when you said it. Funny enough, it was what he expected the situation to be. An ex got abusive, it ended badly, or maybe an accident when you were drunk, but the thought went out once you ended your story. 

“Did–” He was beginning to ask how you handled it, you knew that was what he was wondering. 

“I handled it. No trace. I was coming back here just because I needed my family, needed a familiar face.” 

“Sorry this familiar one looks like shit.” Jax was now trying to lighten the mood. 

“It was an unexpected one too. I wasn’t even going to come to the clubhouse, was going to go straight to a motel and then right to Juice’s.” 

“No love lost, I see.” He let out a laugh. 

“More like too much love lost.” You leaned back in the seat and placed your feet up on the dash. 

__________

You pulled back the shower curtain and wrapped the towel around your body, turning to wipe the fog off the mirror and stare at yourself. The shower brought some life back to your face, but the only thing that was going to make you look well rested was rest. 

As you opened the bathroom door, you started to talk loud, calling out and asking if you could take a nap but your words got cut off as you slammed right into Jax whose hand was raised to knock on the bathroom door. 

“Sorry.” He chuckled and stabilized you by wrapping his hands on your bare arms. 

It was at that moment that the both of you realized this was the closest you’ve been in years. You felt Jax’s breath on your face, it smelt like coffee which made you smile inside. Something about the domesticity of him in his home drinking his morning cup of coffee. 

“I was coming to see if you wanted french toast or waffles.” There was that domesticity again. 

“Jax Teller, who used to burn eggs, is offering me french toast or waffles?” The water was still dripping down your skin as you spoke. 

“Alright.”  his head twisted to the side as he laughed and then looked back at you, his finger now on your shoulder catching one of the stray drops before retracting his hand and looking back at your eyes. “They’re pre-made in a package from the freezer, was just gonna toast ‘em, not get all fancy.” 

“I’ll take both.” 

“Both it is.” He was turning around to go back into the kitchen and you felt your breath exhale the moment he turned. 

You both never got a chance to eat together, he came back to ask you about coffee or orange juice and ended up in his bed. Breakfastless and clothesless. 

As much as it broke you to sneak out, you did it. Sneaking out like this reminded you of what you were trying to leave behind, but now, you had to remind yourself of how safe you felt being here. With Jax. You stepped into the kitchen and saw the toaster housing the burnt french toast accompanied by the burnt waffle in the slot next to it. You laughed and grabbed both, they’d still be better than the junk you were eating on the road. Grabbing a pen you left a note on the table for him. 

Thanks for everything. Taking your burnt breakfast and heading to my brother’s. See you around. xx

With that, you were leaving. It was late afternoon now, meal times didn’t really have a time clock when you were traveling with no sense of time. Driving to your brother’s at this point was like muscle memory, you didn’t have to give it any thought and before you knew it you were there. 

One thing about Juice was that he’d always welcome you with open arms and no questions. Okay some questions, but none that ever felt forced or pointed. 

“Hey! What are you doing here?” He was so chipper and genuinely excited to see you as he opened the door. 

“Refugee looking for shelter.” You smiled back and brought him in for a hug. 

“Come in.” Juice pushed the door open completely and with his free hands moved to grab your bag out of your hand. 

Immediately you felt like a piece of scum in his pristine apartment and you hadn’t even had the grime of the ride on you anymore. “You live here or just showcasing the place?” You teased him. 

He sucked his tongue to the roof of his mouth and made a clicking noise. “I like to keep things neat.” 

“I know we lived in the same house together for years.” You looked at the art on the walls, the only sign that someone made a home of this place. There were pictures of you both, pictures of Juice with your childhood dog, pictures of the club, SOA flags and Harley memorabilia. 

“Hey I have this in my bag.” You smirked and moved to grab your backpack from his hands, he still hadn’t dropped it anywhere likely because he wasn’t sure where it’s place was in his sterile home. 

You pulled the photo out from the side pocket, it was wrinkled and folded, the complete opposite of his. 

“It’s before I started sponsoring, when I just worked at the shop.” He smiled, grabbing the photo from your hands. “You brought me and the guys homemade turkey sandwiches.” 

“You always left your lunch at home.” You shook your head at the memory, “I hated coming by with just food for you.” It was true, you’d make a sandwich for the 4-5 guys that were working that day. It became a sort of bit, the guys were crossing their fingers that whenever Juice was working with them, he’d forgotten his lunch. It helped that you came with a bag of chips and a 6 pack along with the sandwiches. That’s what the picture was. You, Juice, Jax, and Lowell eating turkey sandwiches and washing it down with a beer. 

“Everything okay?” Juice’s voice got solemn as he spoke, still looking down at the photo. 

“It is now.” You nodded with a smile. 

“You need my help with anything?” This time his voice raised an octave, in a more happy way. 

“Just a place to crash.” 

“Second room’s all yours.” He waved his arms in the direction of the room because he knew you were well aware of where it was. 

“I’ll be sure to disinfect my bag before putting it down.” You teased him with a slight push and made your way to the room that used to be yours years ago. 

By the time the two of you caught up, you leaving out the big details that you easily shared with Jax, it was nighttime. He brought you to the clubhouse, excited to share your arrival with the guys, and just happy to have his sister back in town. 

You were plopped on one of the picnic tables as some of the club sat around you, laughing about some joke Tig just said, most of you laughing at him more than with him. Your beer was nestled in your hand as you sipped slow on it, not really feeling like getting drunk much these days. 

“You’re nursing that beer.” Happy’s gruff voice alerted you. It was soft enough that only you heard him. 

“Long drive cross country, it’s making me more tired than anything.” You explained, it was partially true. 

But Happy saw through it. 

“You killed someone.” 

If you had been drinking the beer you would have spit it out by the abruptness of his comment. 

“Excuse me?” You frowned and looked at him, you probably met this member a handful of times but you didn’t know him like you knew some of the other crew. 

“I can tell, you got that vibe.” He nodded his head, his voice extremely raspy. 

“That vibe?” You raised your brows. 

“Yea, that life ain’t hold the same innocence vibe.” He answered you quickly. 

“How would you know what that vibe is?” You were playfully asking now, knowing that it wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world if anyone here knew what you did, but it wasn’t something you were just blurting out. 

He laughed at that and didn’t answer the question. “Don’t worry your secret’s safe with me.”

“You freakin’ out our guest, Happy?” Bobby was walking out from the clubhouse, followed by Juice with a new beer for you despite you still not having this one nearly finished. 

“Happy?” You frowned and looked at Juice as you grabbed the beer. 

Happy grinned and lifted his shirt up to show his abdomen littered with smiley face tattoos and suddenly with no explanation at all, every question you just asked in the last 5 minutes was answered. 

“Oh.” You grabbed your nursed beer and finished it off quickly before moving to the new and cold one. 

Before the conversation could continue, the sound of two motorcycles cut the sound of voices out completely. Your eyes moved to see who it was, even though based on who was here now, the options were limited. You caught a glimpse of his long locks when he took the helmet off. Instinctually your eyes jumped to the movement of the person who came in behind him, tall and burly, and despite him still being far back in the shadows, you knew it had to be Jax’s friend Opie. With ease, your eyes moved back to Jax as he brought his hand through his hair. It was oily again, or still, which had you starting to wonder what his day looked like after you left. 

“Jax!” Juice called out from behind you and it brought you back to the current moment as Jax approached, taking off his riding gloves with a big smile on his face. “Look who's back on the west coast.” Juice was beyond excited to tell Jax, the thought of bringing back the days when the group of you would hang out clearly driving his enthusiasm. 

“Yea, I–” Jax was about to say how he ran into you the night before, you knew it, but your eyes went wide and your head shook just ever so slightly as a hint to let him know you didn’t want Juice to know. Luckily you were behind Juice on the picnic table so he wasn’t able to see it but Jax did clearly. 

What wasn’t clear was how he was taking your action. He seemed a little upset, but also he had a slight smirk on his face. 

“Yea, I see that. It’s good to see you.” He changed his sentence, his eyes staring at you. 

Behind him was Opie who clearly was aware of what happened between the two of you and was trying to hide his smirk from the awkwardness between you and Jax that only you three hopefully could feel. 

Jax took a step forward and you moved off the picnic table to stand. His arm raised to bring you in for a hug. 

“Thank you.” You whispered and squeezed him a little extra. 

“No worries, as always, secret’s safe.” 

[filipfuckingtelford]

30 days Sons of Anarchy fandom challenge

@saracatherine thanks for the inspiration ^_^

I know there a plenty of challenges all over the tumblr, but decided to make my own one. Credits to all other chellenges author. Feel free to reblog and join.

___________________

Day 1: How did it even start? (Anything about how you started watching SoA, did you like it from the first episode or it took you some time to get attached and so on)

Day 2: Who was the first character you liked? (Was your crush on him/her last or not, why did you like him/her and so on)

Day 3: Who is your most favourite character now? (Why him/her?)

Day 4: Who do you actually hate? (Why?)

Day 5: Character you think is overrated?

Day 6: Character you think is underrated?

Day 7: Character everyone hates but you love?

Day 8: Who would be your best friend if you were in series?

Day 9: Your favourite season.

Day 10: Favourite quote from any character.

Day 11: What should've never happened on your opinion?

Day 12: Your most favorite couple in the series.

Day 13: Your least favorite couple in the series.

Day 14: What is your to do list if you are in the series?

Day 15: What would the date with your crush be like?

Day 16: How would your crush act in your relationships?

Day 17: Who should be among the actual club members alive in the last episode?

Day 18: Song(s) that associates with SoA for you.

Day 19: If you could save only one characters (no matter if he/she died in series or not) who would you choose?

Day 20: If you could be in any other fandom with one SoA character, which fandom would you choose and who will join you?

Day 21: You favorite character aesthetics.

Day 22: If you could bring a character from any other fandom to SoA who would it be?

Day 23: What is your SoA dream team? (Those who you would join during the ride or fight for example).

Day 24: How would your OC look like? Describe her/his background and story briefly.

Day 25: How would celebrating you favorite character’s birthday would look like?

Day 26: Would you rather be a croweater, an old lady or the TM mechanic?

Day 27: What should’ve definitely happen in series but never happened?

Day 28: Kiss marry kill.

Day 29: What would be your favorite place to spend time with your favorite character?

Day 30: Short imagine about your favorite character. Any plot, any situation. Whatever you like.

[triviadimplesblog]

30 days Sons of Anarchy fandom challenge

Day 1: How did it even start? (Anything about how you started watching SoA, did you like it from the first episode or it took you some time to get attached and so on).

Started watching about a month or maybe two months ago. It was on my watchlist for a while but I never got around to watching it until I finally did. LOVED it from episode one.

[ailtrahq]

Growing operational costs, lack of trust, and legal scrutiny mark massive losses for Crypto market makers.  The once lucrative Crypto market making sector is navigating choppy waters, with soaring operational costs and a $2 trillion market slump. The latest wrinkle is a loss of trust in market makers, fueled by a spate of legal accusations against key players like Wintermute Trading Ltd. Major liquidity providers such as Auros and GSR Markets Ltd. are diversifying across exchanges, using off-platform storage for Digital Assets, and even deploying borrowed tokens as collateral. However, this dependency on third parties and intermediaries is contributing to a 20 to 30% drop in profitability.  Crypto market makers are struggling with community trust Le Shi, the head of trading at Auros, told News/articles/2023-09-05/Crypto-market-making-profit-margins-sink-30-post-ftx-bankruptcy?utm_source=telegram&utm_content=Crypto&utm_medium=social" target="_blank" rel="noopener">Bloomberg in a recent interview that the whole sector has been rattled by the fall of FTX. The exchange’s massive fall from grace has forced firms to reevaluate their Risk management strategies, which, in turn, has increased their operational costs.  Other cases like the Wintermute Trading scrutiny haven’t helped the sector. The leading market maker was accused of colluding with the now-bankrupt Crypto lender Celsius Digital and its former CEO Alex Mashinsky. Wintermute now finds itself at the center of a lawsuit filed by a group of Celsius investors. This event has added a layer of complexity to the industry’s current challenges, underscoring the fragility of investor trust. Market makers were profitable in 2021 The sector was teeming with profits in 2021, most notably Wintermute, which boasted a trading volume of $1.5 trillion and a net profit of $582 million. However, the scenario has reversed dramatically. Market value has plummeted to $1.1 trillion, and even stalwarts like Jane Street Group and Jump Crypto are retreating from Digital Assets due to reduced trading volumes and a stricter regulatory landscape. The Crypto community is increasingly shifting away from centralized exchange to mitigate Risks. With recent rumours of Binance facing liquidity Risks, this shift could become more rampant in the coming days. Although the majority of spot token trading still takes place on centralized platforms, there’s a noticeable drift towards decentralized options like Uniswap.

[littlevampie222]

I was just reminded that ai never finished my SOA & Gilmore Girls challenges. Oops. Just a little more days to go, so, why not.

30 Day SOA Challenge:

Day 26: Favorite Jax/Opie moment? Honestly, any time they were together were my favorite moments! But I'll share this gif again, as I think this scene is so beautiful! It's just two best friends spending time together outside of the club, just doing normal things. 🖤

[cock-riding-giggity]

30 Day SOA Challenge - Day 27

- A scene that makes you laugh -

[littlevampie222]

30 Day SOA Challenge

Day 21: A scene you really love - When Gemma was a total B.A. with a skateboard! Haha

Gemma’s way is the only way

[lowman-ortiz]

30 Day "Sons Of Anarchy" Challenge

9) Favorite recurring character: Able Teller.

Another shout out to sonsofanarchy.quotes on Instagram :)

[daddies-of-anarchy]

30 Day "Sons Of Anarchy" Challenge

Day 25 - Something you hate about SoA:

Nothing. Everything works. I don't know how it's possible, but it's true.

[livinginsunnyhell]

Ask game for fanfic writers! ⌨️🖊📓📝

1. What fandoms do you write for?

2. What pairings do you write for?

3. What is your most popular fanfic?

4. Do you write original stories as well?

5. What fanfic of yours should everyone have read?

6. What is a fandom you will never write for?

7. What is a ship you will never write for?

8. Archive of Our Own, FanFiction.net, Wattpad, Tumblr, etc. which platform do you prefer?

9. What are your favorite fanfics?

10. How do you stay motivated to finish what you’ve started?

11. What’s your longest fanfic?

12. Do you want to break your readers‘ heart or make them laugh?

13. What is your planning process?

14. What have others criticized about your fanfic?

15. OCs or no OCs?

16. Do you use sentence starters, writing prompts and/or fandom headcanons for your fanfics?

17. Do you use/follow advice from writing blogs/posts?

18. What is your favorite writing prompt?

19. Dead or overused tropes?

20. Can we get a list of all of your current available fanfics?

21. What’s your shortest fanfic?

22. Do you listen to music during your writing process? What music do you listen to while you’re writing?

23. Long chapters or short chapters?

24. How many WIPs (work-in-progress) do you’ve got?

25. How many WIPs will you finish?

26. First-person-narrative or third-person-narrative?

27. Do you take requests?

28. I will name you three things (drunk Ian — shared bachelor party — Gallavich): write a paragraph or two!

29. What’s more difficult? Fanfics or original work?

30. What writing software do you use?

31. Do you use beta/sensitivity readers?

32. Past or present tense?

33. Do friends and family know that you write fanfics?

34. How did you find the magical world of fanfics?

35. What is your favorite review?

36. Did you ever delete a work of yours?

37. Did your work ever get plagiarized?

38. Do you partake in any fanfic/writing events? (Big bangs, zines, NaNoWriMo, etc?)

39. Collaborations or working solo?

40. Do you have any rituals before uploading a fic?

41. What is something you don’t like about your writing?

42. Rudest review?

43. Guilty pleasure tropes and scenarios?

44. Does fanart of your fanfic exist?

45. Do fanfics of your fanfic exist?

46. Few long essay reviews or many short reviews?

47. What fanfic of yours is truly underrated?

48. What is your favorite sentence that you’ve used in a fanfic?

49. Where do you draw inspiration from?

50. Can we get a teaser for an upcoming chapter?

(Don't feel obligated to answer. Thought if you're into these kinda things, that'd be a nice ask. ;))

Oh this is so nice!! Thanks for sending this @annansmith

I chose a few of them to do. 

1. What fandoms do you write for?

Currently, I’m writing for Shameless (Gallavich) but I’ve written for:

Veronica Mars (LoVe), Veep (Amy/Dan), Arrow (Oliver/Felicity), Once Upon A Time (Hook/Emma), The Old Guard (Joe/Nicky), That 70′s show (Hyde/Jackie), Sons of Anarchy (Tara/Jax), Vampire Diaries (Klaroline), Hart of Dixie (Zoe/Wade), Gilmore Girls (Rory/Jess), X-men (Rogue/Pyro), One Tree Hill (Haley/Nathan), and a few others.

2. What pairings do you write for?

Now I write Gallavich. 

But I’d say my top ones I love writing for now (my fanfiction writing has spanned about 14 years) are Dan/Amy, Veronica/Logan, Klaus/Caroline, Mickey/Ian.

3. What is your most popular fanfic?

My most popular fic on Ao3 is The Course of True Love (Arrow) and on FF Of Bloodshed, Babies, and Epic LoVe (Veronica Mars)

4. Do you write original stories as well?

Yes, I do. I’m working on a book, well, two books. But it’s going very slowly. The first is a memoir of my travels from around the world and the second is a vampire urban fantasy one. We’ll see how it goes, but I’d like to finish them by next year and see if I can get them published, but it’s hard so who knows. 

10. How do you stay motivated to finish what you’ve started?

Well, recently I’ve really been trying to finish everything I write. I have a lot of WIPs from years and years ago and even within the the last year, so this answer is pretty new. Basically, I focus on one fic at a time and write a little every day to stay motivated. Now, I try to update once a week on a certain day. I think comments/reviews and kudos and people being genuinely encouraging helps though. It’s also what’s gotten me considering finishing my older fics.

11. What’s your longest fanfic?

Of Bloodshed, Babies, and Epic Love (over 165k)

13. What is your planning process?

Now, it’s different. I have a doc of ideas and I wait to see which one I can’t seem to shake. Then I plan out each chapter with a few sentences and I have a list of things I want to focus on in the story. Usually, each story now has a kind of theme to it and a main focus. I sometimes will just want to write a certain situation/scene/focus and the story is born from there. But what really helps is writing down chapter 1, 2, etc. and having a sentence or two for what I want to happen. It doesn’t always go according to plan, but I never get writers block or forget what happened in previous chapters now.

16. Do you use sentence starters, writing prompts and/or fandom headcanons for your fanfics?

Probably a mixture of fandom (or my personal) headcanons. I don’t start with prompts unless it’s a challenge or sentence starters. Usually, I have a scene I already want to write in my head and then I sit down and write it.

17. Do you use/follow advice from writing blogs/posts?

Yes, I’ve read several books on writing. My undergrad was creative writing too, so I learned a lot there. I also follow writing instagram accounts which are helpful. I take everything I learn with a grain of salt and I see what is best for me. The best advice I heard recently was short sentences and so now I’m experimenting with that.

20. Can we get a list of all of your current available fanfics?

There’s a lot from many different fandoms. I used to be on FF.net as Psyc0gurl0 and now I’m ProstheticLoVe on a03. I like writing on ao3 better cause it’s easier and I love the tagging process. Plus the gallavich fandom on there is unreal. So to think about going back to ff.net to finish my WIPs seems like such a process now. 

Currently though, I’m writing an Ian’s POV 5 chapter fic called Chocolate. It’s not out yet, but it’ll focus on Ian from 1x06 to 1x09 or so and how his feelings for Mickey change and evolve. It’s the second part to a series called Chocolate and Cigarettes. Mickey’s POV was Cigarettes.

22. Do you listen to music during your writing process? What music do you listen to while you’re writing?

Yes, I listen while writing but I need silence while editing. I have a Love (lol) playlist. It’s basically all the love songs that remind me of couples I ship. So for example, The Acid is in there a lot because their music is great, but also Basic Instinct is so haunting. Overall, I like all music except country, so sometimes I’ll listen to my larger playlists while writing. 

23. Long chapters or short chapters?

So this has changed over the years. Initially, I wrote short chapters, then when I got back into fanfiction while writing klaroline they got a lot longer and now it’s just basically where the chapter has a natural ending. So the chapters are between 4 - 10k words depending. I try to get over 4k though. Right now, once I’m done with my current fic, I really want to write something over 100k.

24. How many WIPs (work-in-progress) do you’ve got?

A lot...none in Shameless though. Well, I guess my current one, but I haven’t posted that yet. I’d say I probs have about 10 WIPs spanning different fandoms. I know. But my goal for 2021 is to pick two and finish them. 

25. How many WIPs will you finish?

Not all of them. Some of them are from years and years ago. But I’d like to finish the ones that I still get reviews on. So there’s a SOAs fic I want to finish cause that fandom is so lovely. I also want to finish a klaroline one cause that was fun to write. And my Amy/Dan ones I’d like to finish. I would like to finish my Veronica Mars ones (I have two) but they need a lot more attention, so when people message me about them I tell them the planned ending.

28. I will name you three things (drunk Ian — shared bachelor party — Gallavich): write a paragraph or two!

“Fuck, Mickey, I probably shouldn’t have had the third Hot Toddy,” Ian grimaced as the world around him spun. 

Mickey laughed at him and wrapped an arm around his shoulders. Ian wanted to think his future husband just wanted to pull him closer, but he had a feeling it was to steady him.

“Probably should’ve cut you off earlier,” Mickey said tugging Ian closer. 

Ian wobbled and plopped down on the back steps of the porch. Mickey followed suit a moment letter and they both looked out toward the backyard where the Gallaghers, Balls, and a few of the Milkovich cousins were alternatively huddling around a fire, drinking, and dancing.

“I blame Lip for making us have this stupid shared bachelor party in the first place,” Ian grumbled.

Mickey kissed him on the forehead as Ian lay his head on his shoulder. “It’s Sandy’s fault too.”

Ian hmmed in response and Mickey knew he was going to fall asleep any moment. He ran his hand up and down Ian’s arm and watched as Debbie bounced over to them.

“Jesus, you aren’t even married yet and you two are like an old married couple. Are you going to come dance or what?” she whined.

Mickey looked down at Ian, whose eyes were already closed, and then back up to Debbie. She was watching them with knowing eyes.

“We’ll dance at the wedding. Go grab Lip, I need his help to get Sleeping Beauty upstairs.”

Debbie turned to go get her eldest brother and Mickey looked back down at Ian. In his sleep, he nuzzled Mickey’s shoulder, breathed deeply, and a gentle smile appeared there. 

3 more days and they’d officially be husbands. 

34. How did you find the magical world of fanfics?

I was about 10 and my cousin used to write a buffy the vampire slayer zine. There was a link to a site called buffyworld.com or something like that. And I found fanfic that way. There was a link on the site to ff.net and that’s how I stumbled across that. I stayed there for many many years until my second time in the veronica mars fandom around 2014 when I was lead to a03 and then I’ve been there ever since. On and off, my writing has fluctuated through the years based on my personal life.

49. Where do you draw inspiration from?

Everywhere! omg. It’s insane. Gallavich I love writing for. There’s so many different facets to them, but truly everywhere I find inspiration. I have a whole doc of gallavich ideas that have stemmed from other fanfics, headcanons from me and other people, rewatching episodes, what’s going to happen in s11, cute moments i’d like to see happen, holidays, and just general life. I saw a pic of WW2 vets who were in a long term relationship and i was like mickey and ian! another idea is born.  

[fanaticfangurl21]

Day 26 of 30 days of SOA challenge

A scene that shocked you) Dawn being burnt alive that shit scared me it was so traumatic as a viewer but then also the after affects of it on Tig. It broke my heart just a bit there. 

[garbinge]

When One Day Comes

Chibs Telford x F!Teller!Reader Tig Trager & F!Teller!Reader 30 Day Fic Challenge (26/30)

Summary: An unexpected visitor turns into a trip back to Charming.

Word Count: 4k

Warnings: Angsty. Mentions of violence and injury.

SOA Taglist: @drabbles-mc @justreblogginfics @kmc1989

Part 1 // Part 2

“Some guy’s here.” Thomas walked inside the house and interrupted your paperwork. 

Quickly, you looked up from the scattered mess on the dining room table and stared at Thomas. 

“You tell him that the market is on the next path on the highway, just like the sign says.” 

It was common for people to mix up your dirt path for the one up the road where the large farmer’s market was. It had prompted you and Nero to place a sign at the top of the path to communicate that but occasionally some idiot wouldn’t read and would make their way to your home on the farm. 

“I did, but he told me he was looking for you.” Thomas didn’t seem concerned, he was currently searching through the fridge for something to spoil his dinner but that was the least of your concerns. 

As you stood up, you continued to ask your nephew more questions. “Did he say anything else? Give a name? Say why he was here?” While Thomas had his back turned to you, you were casually grabbing your gun from the lockbox that you kept hidden by the back sliding door. 

“Nah, just that he was looking for you, he looks weird, curly hair, sunglasses– looked stressed.” He had a mouthful of something in his mouth as he spoke, still staring into the fridge. 

“Alright, probably just someone trying to sell us something.” That wasn’t uncommon either, you’d get a lot of sales people to come try and sell you farming equipment, get you to join their local markets, all typical for the size of land you had. But it didn’t take away from your visceral reaction to move towards protecting yourself. That was a habit that was engraved in you from your days in Charming and you’d find that just because you got out of the toxic town, the Teller ways stayed close to you regardless. 

“Oh–he didn’t have a car, looks like he walked from up the path.” The kid still was half in the conversation as he spoke but that detail was one that alerted you that maybe this wasn’t someone trying to sell something, and maybe there was something more happening here. 

Not knowing what you were walking into, you tucked the gun in your waistband and draped your shirt over it before placing your hand on the sliding door handle. “Alright, do me a favor? If you see Nero, tell him to meet me outside.” It was your backup, you didn’t want to alert the young boy and scare him, you knew he had been coming in from his daily chores which meant there wasn’t going to be much that would pry him away from his playstation for the rest of the day. 

As you cautiously walked outside, practically scaling the side of your back porch to get a look at who was there. Your hand was behind you, ready to grab the gun as a threat and if needed force but when you saw the wrinkled button down shirt that was pacing up and down the dirt driveway, your shoulders dropped. As you exhaled out and closed your eyes to shift your mind from one issue that was now nonexistent to the current one you were facing, it was loud enough to grab your visitor’s attention. 

Now, the curly haired man was looking in your direction, taking his sunglasses off to get a better look and calling out your name in a questioning manner. 

“Yea, Thomas had me convinced you were a hitman.” You were now moving down the stairs of your porch and onto the dirt driveway to meet the man. “But I guess he wasn’t too far off.” 

“Your words, they hurt me.” He faked his heart breaking as he grabbed it and made an excruciating face. 

“Tig.” You nodded as you approached him and he immediately stood straight up from his display of acting and brought you in for a hug. 

“Hey, doll.” The squeeze was tighter than you expected but you chopped it up to being years since you last saw him. “Sorry for the surprise visit,” his voice was in your ear before he pulled back and then pointed over his shoulder, “I–uh, tried to be a little discrete, parked my bike at the beginning of the driveway, but he was driving in one one of those ATV’s when I walked up. Didn’t mean to ruffle any feathers.” He referred to Thomas. 

You laughed at that and waved your hand. “Thomas is at the age where if it doesn’t have a controller he doesn’t think twice about it.” 

Tig laughed at that but you could tell that it was a nervous laugh, that he was holding something back. It was then you realized he wasn’t wearing his kutte and figured that had something to do with his visit. 

“No kutte.” You reached out and patted his chest. 

He looked down with a frown and immediately looked up. “Oh, uh, yea, left it back on my bike,” he was pointing over his shoulder again, “he–Chibs, let me know about the rule, Hap too, just in case, you know.” 

The rule. You remembered the last thing you said to Chibs the last time he was standing in pretty much the same spot as Tig was right now. 

“Don’t come back here unless the ink is blacked out and the kutte is off.” 

It wasn’t exactly the rule you gave, you didn’t say next time you come by don’t wear your kutte and leave your bike at the driveway. You told Chibs, he needed to leave the club if he wanted to see you again. But you had to appreciate that he had told his right and left hand men that they had to be respectful of your home, in case. In case. That got you thinking, what did that mean, in case? 

“What do you mean in case?” You felt your heart starting to beat faster and faster as the thoughts danced in and out of your mind. 

Tig looked visibly upset, visibly stressed, and that made you even more on edge. 

“What happened?” You knew what happened but it didn’t stop you from asking the question.

“It’s bad, doll.” Tig inhaled. “He wiped out. He’s at St. Thomas in surgery right now, second one since he got there.” 

“How’d he wipe out?” Again, you had a ballpark idea of how it happened but you needed to hear it from him. 

“He got shot, Mayan retaliation.” 

A good five seconds passed before you responded but to both you and Tig those five seconds were likely feeling like 5 minutes. 

“I’ll get a bag, follow you there.” Your brain was starting to mush together, thoughts were melting into other ones, worry and panic were sparring back and forth in your gut. 

But before either of them could continue the conversation, someone was interrupting you by calling out your name but with Aunt before it. Turning around quickly you saw your eldest nephew on the porch, no weapon in hand but his demeanor was firm, ready to jump into action at any moment. 

“Thomas told me someone was here.” He said as he stepped quickly towards you too, Tig bringing his hand up to the bridge of his nose as he turned around. 

“You alright?” He was next to you, towering over you, similarly to how your brother– his father, did. 

“I’m fine, sweetheart.” You squeezed his shoulder. “An old friend of mine is sick at the hospital and Alexander was just coming by to let me know.” It was a calculated sentence, Abel didn’t know much about Jax, it was a constant struggle of what information you wanted to share with him and what you should. It was a lot easier when he was younger, the story of how his father passed was watered down similarly to his adoptive mother’s but as he grew older, he had more questions, more curiosity. “Why don’t you come help me pack, Abel. I’m going to go visit him for a couple days and I’ll run you through the things around the farm you can take over for me.” 

“Yea, alright.” He wouldn’t take his eyes off Tig who had only waved by lifting his hand slightly at the mention of his first name earlier. 

“C’mon.” You grabbed the young boy by the shoulders and turned him around. 

As you started to grab things and toss them into a duffel bag, you tried to mask your anxiety and spiral of thoughts. 

“So Nero can take care of the feed deliveries and stuff that happens while you’re at school, I’ll call him on my way out, but I’m gonna need you to finish the inventory on the table, I’d ask Thomas but, well, I don’t trust he’ll pull himself away from that TV before the submissions are due.” You chuckled, awkwardly. “But besides that, just feed the critters, morning and night, I’ll toss in some extra allowance for you since you’re gonna have to get up earlier to make it all happen. Also, I’ll leave money for food, don’t cook, I’ve seen what you and Thomas make and I’d rather you order from some shitty fast food restaurant than risk one of your concoctions sending your organs into a fit.” It was then you were pulling your wallet out and searching for bills. “Also ask Nero for anything, I haven’t talked to him yet, but he should be around.” 

You were rambling and Abel saw through it. 

“That guy knew Dad, didn’t he?” He was staring right at you, his eyes were searching for an answer on your face. 

You moved to close the door, you didn’t want Thomas to hear, but it was also a way to break Abel’s stare on you. 

“Yes.” You were still trying to search for what you were going to say but you knew he needed the truth, or at least a morsel of it. “My brother–Jax–your father, lived a complicated life, one that he never wanted you or Thomas to experience or honestly even know about. I’m not sure he really thought through what that looked like once you got older, but nonetheless, his life was not suited for you kids.” Abel was glued to you, taking in every word hoping the next ones would offer up more than this reiteration of what he’d sort of heard before. You plopped down on the bed in front of him and sighed. Abel wasn’t ready for Jax’s full story, his mind was young and impressionable, the chance he’d leave here and go to Charming for answers and end up back in the generation’s curse was too feasible, but he could hear yours. 

“Your dad had a group of friends, always around, honestly they became like family, my mom–your grandma, lived for it, we always had dinners, always hung out, we were all close.” You explained. “There was one friend in particular, that I got, well, close with.” 

Abel laughed at that and smirked. 

“Watch it.” You smirked back at him. 

“Was Dad mad?” He was intrigued by the story, you didn’t often talk about this stuff. 

“Annoyed at first.” You thought back and smirked before correcting yourself. “Yea, he was mad. But the guy–his friend was older and so was I, so he couldn’t really say much about it, just huff and puff.” 

“Was grandma mad?” 

You laughed at that. “The opposite, grandma loved it, the idea to make the family more of a family, she had been pushing it forever. Honestly, I tried to go against it but this really had nothing to do with her, this was…different.” It started to hurt talking about it but you continued. 

“This guy, he was super close to your dad, one of his closest friends, and he was kind, funny, caring, had this accent that just melted my heart.” The smile on your face was contagious and Abel was catching it as you spoke. “He’d take me on these trips, we’d explore all these national parks,” you thought back to every ride you’d taken on the back of Chibs’ bike where you’d have picnics, get caught in the rain, went quarry swimming, the memory of Chibs swimming still making you chuckle. That slowly turned into you remembering other memories, “we went to Ireleand together too.” As those words left your mouth, you felt your stomach drop as you looked up at Abel who was none the wiser of why you really went. 

“You loved him.” Abel was smiling. 

You wanted to agree, even tell him that you still did but that was a can of worms you didn’t need Abel to open, let alone yourself so all you did was nod. 

“What happened?” 

“Remember how I said your father had a complicated life? Well so did his friend, and his friend didn’t want to leave that complicated life and I did.” It broke your heart saying it, you had thought it all these years but never spoke it outloud let alone to your nephew.  

“You left because of us. Thomas and I.” Abel put the pieces together. 

“I left for you. I’d put you before anything, always.” You were leaning over and grabbing his hands and squeezed them. 

“It was that guy that was here last year. The one with the bike.” 

All you did was nod. “He apparently got hurt and I just–” You looked at Abel and weren’t sure if you wanted to say the words, they felt more like something you needed to say out loud for you than for him. 

“Need to know if he’s okay.” He cut you off. 

Another nod escaped you but you spoke up to say something different, something that broke you. “And say goodbye if he isn’t.” A tear fell from your face and you wiped it away immediately and smiled quickly standing up to finish packing your bag. 

Before you could stuff one more item of clothing into your bag, you felt an arm around your shoulder and bring you in for a half hug. “I’ll bribe Thomas with my new controller, we’ll both pick up the farm work while you’re gone.” 

“Thanks for understanding, kiddo.” 

______

The ride was long, longer than you remembered but it made sense that you moved this far away. As you entered the town line, everything came back to you, like a wave that washed over you. One full of memory, grief, and that one feeling that ultimately always wrecked everything. Hope. 

The sounds of more motorcycles joined the one that was already behind you, you recognized some of them but not all of them. They followed you to the hospital and as you stepped out of the car, Tig was walking back up to you, a group of more MC members standing a few feet behind. Despite this being the life you grew up in, it felt strange, it felt wrong, but you pushed that all aside, or at least tried.

“Party of 15 joining us inside?” You asked looking back at the group. 

“It’s a messy time, doll. Our president was gunned down, need all the protection we can spare.” 

“Yea, when isn’t it.” You turned and began your walk into the hospital where you eventually saw Happy. He looked visibly upset, the Sgt at Arms patch on his kutte felt heavier today than other days and you knew that. “Hap.” You whispered and slouched down to see his face before he was standing up quickly and very awkwardly. 

He didn’t move to come hug you at first, but when you dropped your shoulders and tilted your head with an accompanied “c’mere” he was moving to embrace you, an act Happy reserved for rare times in his life, but this qualified as that. 

“He’s out of surgery, they said he’s in serious but stable condition.” He was now looking back between you and Tig as he spoke. 

“Is he conscious? Can I see him?” 

“Only letting one at a time back there, Quinn’s back there now.” Rat spoke up, bringing himself into the conversation as he stood from the seat next to where Happy was. 

“We’ll tell him to jump out.” Tig’s hand was on your back and giving daggers to Rat. “Go, take all the time you need.” 

You stood at the door for a minute, staring at him, all broken and helpless. You felt your fight of flight kick in as you took a step back, followed by a step forward before inevitably the freeze tactic kicked in. Suddenly you were stepping in and at his side. 

His eyes moved to take in the figure next to him and they went wide before they closed. “Quinn, could you tell those lovely nurses to either cut this morphine or give me enough to knock me the fuck out, I’m bloody hallucinatin’.” 

“Not hallucinating.” Your hand moved to lightly push his hair out of his face. “I’m really here.” 

He stared at you for a good minute before smiling. “I must be really bad if they got you to come back here.” 

“You’re fine,” you continued to stroke his hair, “Tig has a way to make everything seem more dramatic than it really is.” It was a lie but you needed him to believe he was going to get better if there was any hope for it to be true. 

“If I knew escaping death was all I needed to do to get you back here, I’d have done this ages ago.” He laughed as he tried to sit up. 

“Hey, hey, hey, hey–relax.” You gripped his arms and assisted him as he scrunched up his face and groaned. 

“You know what happened?” He asked, moving over for you to sit but you didn’t. 

“I do. Tig told me. Retaliation.” You nodded, not letting go of his head despite not wanting to cuddle in next to him. 

“He tell you I’m done?” 

Those words came from him but felt like they were caught in your throat as you tried to answer. 

“You–You’re just saying that, scares like this, they stir up two things in you guys, either the motivation for severe retaliation–the kind that that starts a war, or it shakes up the desire to want to leave, go nomad, take the back seat.” You remembered the typical club ways. 

“I’m not just a member, love. I’m the president, going nomad, taking the backseat, ain’t really a choice for guys like me.” 

“Neither is leaving if I remember correctly.” You took a deep breath. 

Chibs closed his eyes and took a breath similar to yours. “I’m old. Too old for this. I’m not made to hand off the gavel and take the other head of the table. I’m done. After this hit, I’ll be lucky if I can ride again, they’ll offer me a spot out of courtesy but that’s not me.” 

“And what will you do with all this free time you’ll inevitably have?” 

“I have a friend, real looker this friend of mine, pretty as ever, owns a farm a few hours out from here, I’d probably see if she could use the extra farm hands, might take some convincing, but I’m hoping she’ll come ‘round.” 

There it was. That hope that Charming was always serving up. You had been here less than an hour and it was already happening, it wasted no time. 

“Focus on getting better, you can think about your next act when the bruises fade and the bullet hole is just a scar.” You plopped down next to him, your way of softening the blow of not giving him an answer of coming to the farm. You wrapped your arm around his and leaned your head on his shoulder, lightly as to not cause him more pain, but you had a funny feeling that he wouldn’t have told you if he was in pain from it, it was something both of you wanted, to absorb every second of this moment because the next ones were still so unsure. 

______

You sat on the back porch swing, coffee cup in your hand, birds chirping as the sun began to rise across the fields. You stared at the dirt path driveway, like you were waiting for someone to arrive but immediately your thoughts were interrupted by the complaints and arguments of two young boys. 

As your head twisted to look at them, you saw them bickering and slightly pushing each other before they stopped as they got in front of you. 

“See you tonight.” Thomas bent down and placed a kiss on your cheek before he got a head start down the porch. Abel was looking down at you and tilted his head. 

“You alright?” The concern was littered all over his face. 

“I’m fine. You have your keys?” You knew he did, Thomas was normally the forgetful one being the younger more daydreaming brother. 

“Yes, I’ll be home at 4 today, I’m picking up a part for my dirt bike downtown.” He dangled his keys. 

“Sounds good, drive safe.” 

He was leaning down to place a kiss on your cheek similarly to Thomas before he began walking away. But after taking one step, he paused and looked down at you before he followed his brother. “You happy?” 

Big question for two little words. 

“I am, kid.” You smiled and Abel accepted that and nodded before jogging after Thomas. 

You watched them pile into the used car that used to be yours that you gave Abel when he got his license. As the dirt kicked up on the driveway, you still stared down the lengthy path long after they left, only to be interrupted as the accented voice brought you back to the porch. 

“Lost in thought, love?” Chibs was shirtless, wiping the sweat from his forehead as he stood at the deck stairs. 

You couldn’t help the smile that grew on your face as you stared at him. He must’ve gotten up early to take care of the animals, he had dirt on him too which meant he probably did some work in the crop fields or the greenhouse. 

“Just waiting for the day someone comes down that driveway and steals you away from me.” 

“Not happening.” He was walking up to you and leaned down to press a deep kiss to your lips, one that you always melted into fear it’d be your last. “I told you 3 months ago, I tied up all the loose ends, no one knows I’m here. But if you’re not comfortable, you say the word and I’m out of here.” The words were spoken so close to your lips. 

You brought him down for another kiss. “I’m worried about losing you, not pushing you away. Just, hard to believe that dream you were sellin’ over a year ago was in stock is all.” You pecked his lips again. “Plus I like not having 5AM livestock duty anymore.” A laugh escaped you as one left his mouth as well. 

He was standing up now and shaking his head before he realized the porch light was disconnected. His hand reached up to grab the bulb and screw it in tighter. Your eyes stared at the black ink that was spread across his back. It was healing nicely. Maybe that was a sign that you could block out the past and move forward from it, or maybe it was all wishful thinking.

[filipfuckingtelford]

Day 5 of 30 days Sons of Anarchy Fandom Challenge

Day 5: Character you think is overrated.

Well, for me it's Jax. I know many SoA fans love him, but for me this character is nothing special. Sometimes he's really cool, reasonable and clever, but mostly he acts selfish and stupid. And in last seasons he realle became who he replaced and even worse because of some kind of hypocrisy in everything he does.

[gravihtyk]

What happened to my April 2020 Goals: My First Steps to Gaining Weight + My Goals for May 2020

For the month of April, I set three goals for myself:

1. To wake up in the morning each day.

My body clock has been pretty messed up since last year. I've always been a night owl, so when I was reviewing for SOA exam P, I got used to studying all through out the night and going to bed when the sun is almost up. I usually woke up at around 2 in the afternoon. I got enough of sleep and I got enough work done at night, but I missed pretty much most of the day and I felt like my days were going too fast. Last March, in the midst of quarantine and having no classes, I felt worse about my sleeping schedule. I thought waking up super late in the day made me unproductive and still left me feeling like I had no energy. I also felt like I was always running late especially when I had to meet a professor at school or needed to go to the bank. It also made me miss breakfast and lunch and even with that, I woke up not feeling hungry at all. I felt like I was losing weight again and I dreaded it. So I made myself wake up in the morning all through out April, still not early in the morning but at least before noontime, so I can do (and eat) more during the day.

2. To eat breakfast everyday.

As I've already mentioned, I kept skipping my breakfast because of my bad sleeping schedule before April. I know that breakfast literally means breaking your fast from sleeping, so any meal you eat after you wake up from a long sleep is your breakfast. But in March, I would wake up not feeling hungry at all so I didn't eat anything immediately and sometimes I didn't notice the time, it would already be dinnertime for my family and that's only when I would remember to eat. I was like doing intermitent fasting without even trying. I didn't get to eat 3 meals a day at all. I only ate twice and sometimes once a day, and it left me feeling so weak, all I wanted was to lay in bed all day. I often got headaches as well. So when April came, I told myself that I need to fix this problem if I wanted to gain weight. I have to eat after I wake up in the morning, fill my stomach with something and be energized for the day.

3. Eat 3 meals a day.

I realized that one reason why I did not feel hungry even when I missed meals was because I had no appetite. Even when I ate, even when the food used to be my favorite, even when it was so tasty, I could only eat a small amount. I told myself, this can't be. I have to eat a lot to gain weight. It had been like this for a long time now. I didn't get hungry after I woke up, I didn't get hungry when it was the usual time for a meal like during lunchtime. And I realized that it was because I wasn't always eating my meals on time and I kept missing meals. I did a lot of searches related to appetite on Google and Youtube and in every article or video that I read or watched, it was recommended to eat on a schedule so that your body gets used to it that when the time comes when you usually have a meal, you will feel hungry and you will have the appetite to eat. So I thought, I have to eat my breakfast, lunch and dinner on the usual times that most people eat them. But since I only made it a goal to wake up anytime before noon, I was content with setting around noon time as my breakfast time, anytime before evening as my lunch time and evening as my dinner time. I also only made myself eat 3 main meals even when it's usually recommended to eat more often throughout the day for weight gain (I eat some snacks too, I made myself a meal plan which I'll share to you soon!), because I thought that I might not be able to eat 4-5 meals a day since I was still used to eating twice a day, I might not be able to reach that goal. So I set a reasonable and achievable goal for myself.

The month had come to an end, it's actually already May 1st when I'm writing this, and I'm glad to say that I'd been pretty much consistent in working on my goals. I tracked my progress using the Habit app on my phone.

As you can see, I only really started getting consistent on April 12, because that was when I started my meal plan and I told myself that to be able to stick with my meal plan and eat everything in it, I had to wake up early to be able to eat my 3 meals, which were basically already my goals. I didn't do them every single day (some days I forgot to track them too 😅) but I'm already happy that I did them on MOST days. I also hadn't been waking as early as I wanted to. Although I didn't make it a goal to wake up early, I set my alarm clock at 9am every single day because to me that was an ideal time to wake up, but I just turn the alarm off and close my eyes again, promise to just get the dryness out of my eyes then I'll get up from my bed but I usually fall back to sleep. 😅 I'd get up right before noontime or when I wake up and it's past 11, I usually turn to my phone and check social media until it's way past noon and I'd only get up when I remember that I have a meal plan to stick to and goals to accomplish. It's been like that the past few days, but for the most days, I was successful in getting up before 10am.

There were days that I wasn't able to eat 3 meals, but note that what I consider my meals are the meals in my meal plan. So if I didn't eat the lunch that's in my meal plan because I got so full from the food that isn't in my meal plan that my mother gave me (like bananacue and boiled potatoes 🤤), then I skipped lunch even when there was an alternative. (Also, if you're Filipino, you know that any meal without rice is not considered a meal. 😂)

I was most successful in eating breakfast each day. There was just a day that I stayed too long in bed after waking up so I didn't consider that I ate my breakfast that day even when I did, a punishment for not getting up immediately. 😅

I'm honestly kind of still disappointed about myself for not doing all these every single day but as I've told myself before, this is enough. I have actually already made it a habit to wake up in the morning and eat my breakfast and I have an appetite and these are all that matters. My end goals are to wake up early and to eat my meals to gain weight, and I'm happy that I know I'm getting there already. I think what hugely contributed to my success is that I set achievable goals for myself. I didn't ask myself to wake up at 7am. I didn't ask myself to eat 6 meals a day. I didn't ask myself to gain these many pounds in a month. I made myself took baby steps instead of long strides that don't last that long because they're just very hard to do when you still have short limbs. I also looked for the root of my problems. I couldn't eat a lot so I couldn't gain weight, but that was because I didn't really have an appetite. I couldn't eat at least 3 meals a day, but that was because I wake up so late. So I worked on my appetite and getting up in the morning.

I've realized many things in the month of April and I'm definitely going to take those lessons with me through the month of May to be able to achieve my new goals.

For the month of May, I want to:

1. Wake up and get up from bed earlier, before 10am.

Having my lunch and dinner almost right after the other keeps my stomach very full and I feel uncomfortable. So I'd have to get up earlier so as to have more time in between my meals for my food to get digested properly.

2. Be more consistent in eating 3 meals a day.

I just hope I have all the foods and ingredients I need for my meal plan all the time. If that doesn't happen often, then I'd have to settle with alternatives, especially to my ulams, but I'll make sure I eat a full cup of rice every lunch and dinner.

3. Workout each day.

I know this might seem excessive but I want to try the 30-day ab workout challenge and see if it really works. Eating more food has me feeling bloated most of the time and I think doing ab workouts helps with that, so I'll try doing it everyday for 10-20 minutes. I'll also be dedicating alternate days for upper body and lower body workouts.

I hope to develop better habits this May and get nearer my goals. I also wish you success in your own journey, whatever that may be. Let's keep working hard and striving for the best for ourselves. 💕

[pope-francis-quotes]

8th September >> (@ZenitEnglish) #Pope Francis #PopeFrancis in #Madagascar: ‘The demands that Jesus sets before us cease to be burdensome as soon as we begin to taste the joy of the new life that he himself sets before us’. Full Text.

#PopeFrancis’ Homily (Full Text) #PopeinAfrica #Mauritius #Mozambique

Pope’s Homily in Madagascar (Full Text)

‘The demands that Jesus sets before us cease to be burdensome as soon as we begin to taste the joy of the new life that he himself sets before us’

Today, Sept. 8, Pope Francis celebrated Mass in the Soa Mandrakizay diocesan field in Antananarivo, Madagascar, during his second full day of his visit to the country, during his 31st Apostolic Trip. Francis is traveling to the African nations of Mozambique, Madagascar and the island of Mauritius, Sept. 4-10, 2019.

Here is the full Vatican-provided text of the homily:

* * *

The Gospel tells us that “great multitudes accompanied Jesus” (Lk 14:25). Like the multitudes gathered along his path, you too have come in great numbers to receive his message and follow in his footsteps. But you also know that following Jesus is not easy. Today, Luke’s Gospel reminds us of how demanding that commitment can be.

We should realize that Luke sets out those demands within his account of Jesus’ ascent to Jerusalem. He starts with the parable of the banquet to which everyone is invited, especially the outcasts living on the streets, in the squares and at the crossroads. And he concludes with the three “parables of mercy”, where a party is celebrated when what was lost was found, where someone who seemed dead is welcomed with joy and restored to life with the possibility of making a new start. For us as Christians, our sacrifices only make sense in the light of the joyful celebration of our encounter with Jesus Christ.

Jesus’ first demand has to do with family relationships. The new life the Lord holds out to us seems troubling and scandalously unjust to those who think that entry into the kingdom of heaven can be limited or reduced only to bonds of blood or membership in a particular group, clan or particular culture. When “family” becomes the decisive criterion for what we consider right and good, we end up justifying and even “consecrating” practices that lead to the culture of privilege and exclusion: favouritism, patronage and, as a consequence, corruption. The Master demands that we see beyond this. He says this clearly: anyone incapable of seeing others as brothers or sisters, of showing sensitivity to their lives and situations regardless of their family, cultural or social background “cannot be my disciple” (Lk 14:26). His devoted love is a free gift given to all and meant for all.

Jesus’ second demand shows us how hard it is to follow him if we seek to identify the kingdom of heaven with our personal agenda or our attachment to an ideology that would abuse the name of God or of religion to justify acts of violence, segregation and even murder, exile, terrorism and marginalization. This demand encourages us not to dilute and narrow the Gospel message, but instead to build history in fraternity and solidarity, in complete respect for the earth and its gifts, as opposed to any form of exploitation. It encourages us to practise “dialogue as the path; mutual cooperation as the code of conduct; reciprocal understanding as the method and standard” (Document on Human Fraternity, Abu Dhabi, 4 February 2019). And not to be tempted by teachings that fail to see that the wheat and the chaff must grow together until the return of the Master of the harvest (cf. Mt 13:24-30).

Finally, how difficult it can be to share the new life that the Lord offers us when we are continually driven to self-justification, because we think that everything depends exclusively on our efforts and resources! Or, as we heard in the first reading, when the race to amass possessions becomes stifling and overwhelming, which only increases our selfishness and our willingness to use immoral means. Jesus’ demand is that we rediscover how to be grateful and to realize that, much more than a personal triumph, our life and our talents are the fruit of a gift (cf. Gaudete et Exsultate, 55), a gift created by God through the silent interplay of so many people whose names we will only know in the kingdom of heaven.

With these three demands, the Lord wants to prepare his disciples for the celebration of the coming of the kingdom of God, and to free them from the grave obstacle that, in the end, is one of the worst forms of enslavement: living only for oneself. It is the temptation to fall back into our little universe, and it ends up leaving little room for other people. The poor no longer enter in, we no longer hear the voice of God, we no longer enjoy the quiet joy of his love, we are no longer eager to do good… Many people, by shutting themselves up in this way, can feel “apparently” secure, yet they end up becoming bitter, querulous and lifeless. This is no way to live a full and dignified life; it is not God’s will for us, nor is it the life in the Spirit that has its source in the heart of the risen Christ (cf. Evangelii Gaudium, 2).

With these demands, the Lord, as he walks towards Jerusalem, asks us to lift our gaze, to adjust our priorities and, above all, to make room for God to be the centre and axis of our life.

As we look around us, how many men and women, young people and children are suffering and in utter need! This is not part of God’s plan. How urgently Jesus calls us to die to our self-centredness, our individualism and our pride! In this way, we can allow the spirit of fraternity to triumph – a spirit born from the pierced side of Jesus Christ, in which we are born as God’s family – and in which everyone can feel loved because understood, accepted and appreciated in his or her dignity. “In the face of contempt for human dignity, we often remain with arms folded or stretched out as a sign of our frustration before the grim power of evil. Yet we Christians cannot stand with arms folded in indifference, or with arms outstretched in helplessness. No. As believers, we must stretch out our hands, as Jesus does with us” (Homily for the World Day of the Poor, 18 November 2018).

The Word of God that we have just heard bids us set out once more, daring to take this qualitative leap and to adopt this wisdom of personal detachment as the basis for social justice and for our personal lives. Together we can resist all those forms of idolatry that make us think only of the deceptive securities of power, career, money and of the search for human glory.

The demands that Jesus sets before us cease to be burdensome as soon as we begin to taste the joy of the new life that he himself sets before us. It is the joy born of knowing that he is the first to seek us at the crossroads, even when we are lost like the sheep or the prodigal son. May this humble realism inspire us to take on great challenges and give you the desire to make your beautiful country a place where the Gospel becomes life, and where life is for the greater glory of God.

Let us commit ourselves and let us make the Lord’s plans our own.

[Original text: French; Vatican-provided Text and Translation]

8th SEPTEMBER 2019 10:26POPE AND HOLY SEE

[littlevampie222]

30 Day SOA Challenge

Day 25: Funniest scene (or just one that makes you laugh)? For me, it's actually when Gemma smacks Cherry with the skateboard. But, since I already used that scene in this challenge before, I'll go with this one...the guys laughing at and picking on Opie at his wedding as he recites their funny little phrase that they do at club weddings 😂