#24 hours without sleep

[lycorisketch]

college is hell

i have not slept in 24 hours

the only thing keeping me sane

is tumblr

and a silly cookie game

aaaaaaaa

[copia]

not to sound insane but he was dancing around singing rain so i was dancing too and i swear to god above that he met my eye on one line. we both reached out and pointed and sung and danced like i've done with people a million times in nightclubs but this time it was with vessel

[wuxian-vs-wangji]

Every time Prapai gives Sky medicine, he's narcoleptic inside 5 minutes.

[dreamwinged]

goodmorning :<

i have fallen quite ill + currently hoping i dont have to do anything today because i am very sick ! i felt too weak pretty much all day yesterday to get out of bed this sucks so baddddd

[buddiesmutslut]

We’ve all been screaming about Evan “That’s why you’re so… *bisexual hand gesture* pent up” “Well, I wish I could help.” Buckley, but can we talk about Eddie in that scene?

Eddie has been in the show for 6 seasons and, to my memory (which could be wrong bc I haven’t watched the previous seasons in over a year) Eddie’s never really been “pent up” (due to lack of sex) or anything before.

Like, in s2. That man wasn’t going to cheat on his wife, regardless of the fact that she completely abandoned them for years. Those rose-covered glasses he’s wearing now have been dialed up by a lot, but he was definitely still wearing them while they were separated, so that was at least 2 years without sex. Probably substantially longer, given that he was deployed & then came home injured & then they were constantly fighting. That doesn’t really make for a great sex like.

Then, she dies, and the tsunami & lawsuit & Chris’ trauma all happens, and Eddie uses illegal street fighting to manage his feelings.

I don’t remember him making any comments about wanting to meet someone, or be with someone in the time before Shannon & Ana, and he only went after Ana bc she was there when everyone was telling him not to miss out on anything (even tho he very clearly was not ready) & that’s another 2.

We have the same thing again between Ana & Marisol. We know he’s a family man, but he certainly isn’t making any effort to get any or meet people. He only agrees to go on dates bc his aunt guilts him into it, & there’s a year and a half (roughly) between the EddieAna breakup & him calling Marisol.

Idk, I find it hard to believe that - between being a full time firefighting father & nephew & grandson & friend & basketball games & trauma & mental breakdowns & healing from injury after injury - this man is finding time for regular sex, & we’ve never seen him “pent up” as Buck said.

It just feels very weird to me. Like, that kind of painted Eddie as a man that is concerned with consistently needs to get his dick wet or he gets all sweaty & weird, and that’s never really been his character.

It would definitely make sense if it was anxiety rearing its head and/or his struggle with Catholic guilt. I mean, he consistently uses exercise as a way to let off steam when he’s struggling (in 2x01, when he’s in the gym as he & Buck are butting heads. The street fighting arc. The fact that he has a lot of heavily physically exerting hobbies, even if we don’t see them on screen.)

Idk, to frame it as Eddie not getting laid enough (when they also literally showed us a scene of them doing it the day before?) feels very OOC to me.

Unless Buck was seeing it as sexual tension & not the anxiety that it actually was bc he was feeling sexually charged & projecting????

Idk. I’ve been thinking about this for DAYS & I can’t make it make sense with Eddie’s character.

[ryuseitai]

idontwanna play enstars aevent i dont wanna Yes i do yes i do yes i do yes i

[inactivehermit]

Oops. I got sick. Does my workplace care? No, I'm still working. Is it on the last week when finals are due? Yes, I got a test and a final essay project. Recovery is slow, and I'll be busy, BUT chapter 2 will be out before the next year

[disorganised-bagel]

been playing way too much slime rancher recently, and am now getting The Urges to make some kind of rtc slime rancher au

[i35e]

this year

became radio dj

broke up w/ the woman i thought i'd marry

first hardcore show

first time setting up a concert

promoted into first corporate role

hit my lowest wt since 2019

invested in stocks (3.2k)

went to nudist beach 3x

hooked up with seven girls

finally embraced the fact that i'm gay lol ?

started skool for audio eng/ent tech

went to 6 different states

met up with childhood best friend in NYC after a decade of not talking

over 206 new albums

started drumming

started to learn vocal distortion/how to scream

started building 2 PCs

started P+S photog for zines

got my shit together, gained 7 lb

got a butt again <3

3 tattoos scheduled for December

about 20 concerts altogether

almost a YEAR clean from self harm (again)

[orcelito]

Despite all odds, I have arrived home safely👍

Turns out that the earlier goop was the better goop. The adderall goop. The adderall has worn off now though. So I am. Very incredibly out of it.

But I am home. And I will take my quick shower. And then I will climb into bed.

I do need to eat. But... later...

[beck-a-leck]

Things i should have bought before long overnight road trips:

1. Book light

2. Travel pillow

Time to resort to the classic road trip activity: put in ear buds, turn on music, waych scenery, vividly imagine Scenarios for the Blorbos

[doberrrman]

I have this feeling that I have unofficial beef with my neighbor...

[mango-sideburns]

So I'm doing a whole book binding thing and........binding the transcripts of all the episodes of TAZ and making like physical books of them would be dumb right?

........right?

[dentist-brainsurgeon]

I've been running on less than two hours of sleep the entire day and it's hitting hard nowwww

[purrfectly]

HELP?

[psychologeek]

I have these thoughts, about how fucked up it is that people use "genocide" and "holocaust" BECAUSE it's jews and a Jewish state they talk about.

How, even if it was genocide-

(it's not)

- out of 15 shades of genocide in the last century, you make sure to compare to something that happened to us.

That is still happening, because this is what being Jewish is-

"that in every generation", we say every year, "they are standing for us to parish us."

"שבכל דור ודור עומדים עלינו לכלותנו".

And the "them" isn't spesified (it's not like it's one. And they keep changing. Whoever has the power to.)

And it is present, continues, because it is ALWAYS and it's a warning and a promise and a reminder. It's happening. Now, tomorrow - it's coming.

Always.

I think about over two thousands bloody years.

I think about the way the holocaust shaped us -

The way The Destruction shaped us -

Two thousand years of blood and exiles and -

From the burning of The House to the burning homes in the ghettos.

I think about the way HaKhurban, The Destruction, is one word. A Name.

(there's one, big event)

I think the way HaShoa, the Disaster, is one word. A name.

I think about the destruction of the foundation, of Dat and Bnei Israel and the way it had to be shifted, as a way of life that is so inherently related to land, that it took about hundreds of years to make the transition from a Home, Beit HaMikdash, meaning "house of the hollying" to smaller houses of worship, Batey Knesset, meaning "houses of gathering".

I think about turning from a nation to smaller communities, Kehilot.

I think about destruction and ashes and death.

I think about shattered glass and people burning with holly places, and I don't know if it's 80 or 2000 years ago.

I think about destruction

I think about glass, melting in the heat. Turning to new shapes.

I think about waves, going back and forth.

I think about the doors of Nikanor, and a hidden basket on the Nile, and overcrowded ships.

I think about communities burning, living behind one from town, two from family. An ember saved from the Pyre.

I think about the destruction of communities.

I think about the re-forging of a nation.

(it isn't pretty. It isn't gentle. It is broken and painful and destructive and heat)

I think about Rabi Akiva looking at the destroyed Kodesh HaKodashim, the Holliest chamber in the Holliest place, where even the Kohen Gadol can only enter once a year.

I think about foxes running around, in the violated, broken sanctuary.

(I think about bones, dry and old, rising from their graves and forming a structure. I think about the pain of recreating neurons and muscles and skin)

I think about Rabi Akiva, and remember -

(He laughed)