#2025 is gonna be one hell of a year
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can’t do anything about it anymore
#republican assholes#fuck trump#2025 is gonna be one hell of a year#we’re in for a long 4 years#we’re fucked
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HAPPY NEW YEAR !!! here's some of my fave/most popular art I did in 2024 <3
#shroomer talks !#the last one is blurred because its spoilers#i wanted to finish it so badly before the end of the year but alas... i have a job#hopefully will be able to finish it tomorrow or the day after#anyways!! what a good run this year has been!!#its so funny most of these pieces were done in the last few months lol i did not like any of my drawings or even had any finished pre-augus#and then boom. south park happened.#and suddenly i was rejuvenated. like a fish in water#if ill be honest with you guys ive had some of the worst art block for last few years/been so incredibly unsatisfied with my art#and its only been since august where ive finally started becoming a bit more ok with the work ive produced#i dont necessarily think ive made anything that could be a magnum opus or whatever. i dont even think i can really go:#“yea. i did that. hell yea. this is amazing”#its more like a “yea. im starting to see growth. im going somewhere. i think.”#but thats way better than what it was before where i just straight up hated my art lol#i still kinda do hate it though but its starting to be less#or at the very least its in a more positive direction where im thinking “ok i hate it but im gonna try and learn from this”#anyways thanks all of you for sticking around with little old me <3#MORE SOUTH PARK CONTENT TO COME IN 2025!!#youre not getting rid of me that easily#south park#splatoon
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the backlog of jrwi content goes crazy like we got, the riptide hiatus, the suckening s2, WONDERLUST!, and pd s3.. do not know in what particular order these r gonna get tackled in or when but god am i scared !
#/gen when riptide comes back from war is going to be one of the best days in the year cause god 2024 got me struggling !!!!!!!!!!#if i had to guess though I think wonderlust and riptide would be a rotating cycle for a bit until one of them ends#then pd s3 pls>???? (so scared abt what the hell bizly has in plan since everyone is so happy now)#after that then i assume is the return of the suckers#so i feel like thisll all together take up till like late 2025 and another public content drought to get up to the suckening#but this is all speculation by someone with a very unhealthy obsession with stupid ttrpg podcast#jrwi#not gonna campaign tag anything xcept wonderlust beacuse i love you wonderlust my beloved#jrwi wonderlust#oh god THE 9K CONVERGENVCE PATREON GOAL.#OH NO.>???????>?> my mind is melting rn so much is building up and terrified is not enough to describe it
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THINGS!
2025 is going to be the most jam packed stressful year of my life & i know that for sure because a lot is already planned. So i WILL be an absolute mental wreck (this is apologies in advance) & i will literally be clinging onto support most likely the whole year so tumblr will either be me spamming constantly or me not here for weeks or months at a time & barely posting? i’m so unpredictable. Anyways my entire life is guaranteed to change & the best case scenario will still ruin a lot of shit for me so if i get really depressed THERE IS REASON!!!! & i’ve already made several promises so the world is stuck with me if i can help it. so uuhhhhhhhhh YEAH. ANYWAYS IM SCARED FUCKING SHITLESS LIKE ZERO SHIT SCARED OUT KF MY FUCKING MIND SO YEAH. THE MENTAL STATE WONT BE THE BEST. LOVE YOU GUYS!!! IF MY ACTIVITY IS SPOTTY IM NOT DEAD WE’RE PROBABLY JUST DISSOCIATED AS SHIT!
Anyways. TLDR i’m going to be super fucking stressed out & out of pocket for the next year because of shit.
Any friends of ours read tags pretty please <3
#new year 2025#going to be super hyperactive or stare at a wall for a week & i don’t know which one it will be yet it’s leaning towards stare at a wall#for maybe like a month. just stare at wall & cry#BUDDY REN IS NOT OKAY! BUT HANGING IN THERE!#WE COMMITTED TO HARD TO THE BIT THAT IS LIFE SO YALL ARE STUCK WITH ME LESS SUN DONT SHINE RIVERS TAKE ME DOWN!#mighhhhhht end up relapsing on the addiction but that is way better than being dead. it doesn’t have to be healthy at this point#as long as it keeps me alive & sane i guess? i’ll obviously try not to but like dark times are dark#life update#IF YOU ARE AN IRL THAT I TALK TO OFTEN & YOU NOTICE ME NOT RESPONDING TO ANYTHING OR REACHING OUT PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD REACH OUT#IM SAYING THIS NOW BECAUSE IVE BEEN INCREDIBLY SUICIDAL BEFORE & AM BEING CAUTIOUS AS HELL!!!! MENTAL STATE IS NOT A FUCKING GAME OVER HERE#LIKE IF I START SHOWING SIGNS & I AM NOT TAKING CARE OF IT ALREADY REN IS A STUBBORN BITCH & WILL REFUSE HELP BUT IM NOT PLAYING#IF SHIT STARTS GETTING CONCERNING FOR THE LOVE OF GOD PLEASE INTERVENE#LIKE OBVIOUSLY IF YOU ARENT DOING GOOD EITHER & NEED PRIORITIZE YOURSELF DO THAT!!!#BUT IF YOU ARE IN A POSITION TO HELP & CATCH ON TO ANY CONCERNING SIGNS PLEASSSSSSE DONT LET THIS BITCH TURN HELP DOWN & INTERVENE#WE WILL PROBABLY NEED ALL THE HELP WE CAN GET & ALL THE SUPPORT WE CAN ASWELL#BUT ALSO TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF PLEASEEEE? DONT IGNORE YOUR OWN NEEDS#APOLOGIES IF THIS IS WORDED BAD IM NOT THE BEST WRITER THATS NOT MY JOB#SERIOUSLY LOVE YOU GUYS & IM GOING TO TRY MY HARDEST TO SUPPORT MYSELF BUT WE MIGHT NEED MORE HELP THAN WE CAN GIVE OURSELVES ALONE?#IF ANY OF THIS SHIT MAKES SENSE#MIGHT NOT? I DUNNO DM ME IF YOU WANT TO BATTLE PLAN WITH ME#THE BATTLE BEING LIFE WHILE CHANGING LITERALLY EVERYTHING & MAYBE BEING AN INTERNALLY DISPLACED REFUGEE IN THE COMING MONTHS#I LOVE YALL! UH THANKS FOR READING I GUESS? IM TIRED & GONNA SLEEP NOW#GOOD NIGHT YALL <3
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nothing like dropping a hot $300 on six months worth of contact lenses on a tuesday morning 💀 did I get any sort of rush or gratification from this purchase? absolutely not. will I be able to see without my glasses giving me a tension headache? I guess vision has a few perks but not many
#I haven't had contact lenses since the end of 2022 so this is a treat#also my FUCKASS vision prescription expires in april 2025 and they apparently only last one (1) calendar year now? go to hell for that#I'm gonna have to buy another two boxes before april just to get through the year#seriously my eye prescription has barely changed since 2015 and y'all are gonna make me pay $150 a year to get it renewed. federal prison
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canva addiction is going good. im straight up designing covers for fics i havent even written yet
#lord speaks#fanfiction#the but one flesh trilogy is gonna be the 2025 project and all the covers are already done#descending into wincest hell for the first time in 9 years babey
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─ 𝘚𝘌𝘊𝘙𝘌𝘛𝘚, 𝘚𝘌𝘊𝘙𝘌𝘛𝘚 🫀
max verstappen x singer!fem reader // smau
⤷ summary: when max verstappen starts commenting on the posts of the beloved singer y/n l/n, fans are confused and less than enthusiastic at the new friendship. what they could never expect is just how long they've been 'friends'...
based on this request <3
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liked by sabrinacarpenter, maxverstappen1, and 46,908 others
tagged sabrinacarpenter
ynusername my new album is now officially out on all platforms! thank you so so much for all of the love and support, and special thanks to sab for her feature on the song <33 love u bb girl 🫦🫦 now that the album's out, tour next!!! see you all soon!
23,560 comments
user1 THE ALBUM OUT. THIS IS NOT A DRILL PEOPLE THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
user2 i cannot be normal about this i fear
user3 ik her back hurts from CARRYING the music industry on her back 😩
user4 hey so WHO TF IS SO AMERICAN ABOUT?? A LOVE SONG
user5 y/n writing a love song in god's year of 2024... wow
user6 y/n in the top 10 charts, fork found in kitchen
user7 sabrina and y/n are never beating the gf allegations
ynusername damn right we're not 😏
user7 HOLY SHIR HOKY SHIT HOKST SHUT
user8 y/n's in love and it's not with me, hanging myself as we speak
user9 the comment is gonna get reported but so real op
user8 can't a woman hang herself in peace 😣
user10 album's such a banger i had this shit bumpin at my grandmas funeral 🙏🏼 rest in piece nancy 🕊️💪🏻
user11 OH MY GOD???
user12 rest in piece nancy you would've loved make you mine 😔
ynusername oh my god please tell me your joking
user10 sorry queen the grind never stops
ynusername NO SHOT
maxverstappen1 great album! 👍🏼
user13 why does he text like my father 🧍🏻♀️
user14 brother eughh
user15 what da hell is a polar bear doin in arlington texas
ynusername thank you max!!!
user16 y/n l/n to redbull in 2025
user17 hellurrrrr who is this man in ur likes y/n
user18 f1 driver!!
user17 Y/N NO ATHELETES PLEAEJEWK 🫵
user18 tour content soon??? i'm sat
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user19 bro looks like he snuck onto earth, get his ass outta here
user20 grammy-award winner, vogue cover model, new york university graduate and Some Fucking Guy
user21 not y'all coming to her defense like the mighty morphin power rangers 💀💀 he's literally a world class athete and she writes pop music
user20 17.172.224.47
user21 IS THAT MY IP ADDRESS??
user20 melinda charleton
user22 IS THAT HIS MOTHER'S NAME!!?1?1!
user20 you want me to do you too???
user22 no we good 😃
user23 ruth bader ginsberg did not die for this
user24 now wtf does this have to do with babe ruth 🤨
user25 WHOOOOO 😧
user24 ... that wasn't right was it
user26 now let's be fr he does NAWT have a chance
user27 have u seen the marble-carved  goddesses these men pull, i fear he does 😔
user28 please no i feel ill
user29 TWO???? OH HELL NAW
user30 two might be pushing it, only one was confirmed
user31 jesus christ
user32 first taylor, now this
user33 yall, all he commented was great album 💀💀 yall are LEAPING to conclusions
user34 what can i say it's an art
user35 i do not see 👁️👄👁️
user36 no like 💀💀 im in your walls
user37 haha max verstappen!! right!!! (theres a sniper at ur location)
user38 omg ur so right 🤩 it is about him (i have a bomb strapped to my chest)
user39 i dont mean to sound stupid, idk who that man is, if i saw him on the streets i wouldnt know a thing 🥱
user40 this is so random too like what 😭
user41 the power of kindness won't work here, i have to throw him off a building
user42 i used to be a max verslsjjwwo lover 🤩 now im just a max verslsjjwwo hater 😔
user43 NURSE 🫵 SHE'S OUT AGAIN
user44 why would u put that into the universe 😧
user45 alright, lets get you to bed grandma
user46 mari stop being delusion and go touch grass 🧍🏻♀️
user47 ENOUGHHHH
user48 ain't no way in hell 😭
user49 ik ur feet hurt from all this jumping to conclusions babe
user50 lets leave the parkour to the athletes 😃
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liked by maxverstappen1, landonorris, and 54,789 others
ynusername italy thanks for letting me be inside you (; it was such a lovely show, expect me back asap!!!!
15,267 comments
user51 IT WAS SO GOOD I THNK I BLACKED OUT THE WHOLE TIME THO
user52 oh!
user51 oh so now this isn't a safe space
user53 LANDO AND MAX IN TGE LIKES??? NO NO NO NO
user54 ABORT ABORT ABORT
user55 y'all are doing too much 🙄 she's one of the top artists in the world, i think it's safe to say they might like her music
user56 the second picture 🧎🏻♀️do you need a stool cause i can kneel and be really quiet
user57 y/n fans be normal challenge (impossible!!!) (never done before)
user56 WOMP WOMP
maxverstappen1 wonderful show! 🙏🏼 you are so talented
ynusername ty max (: im glad you could come see me
user57 ain't NO WAYYYYYY
user59 THIS IS SIXKENJNG IM GONNA PUKE
sabrinacarpenter my gf looking sexy 🫦🫦🫦
ynusername only for u bbg 🧎🏻♀️🧎🏻♀️🧎🏻♀️
user60 BOOOO 🗣️ GET A ROOM
user61 do y'all need a third!!!!
user62 mamma mia pizza pasta mozzerella moment
user63 i just put u on a watchlist
user62 🧍🏻♀️
landonorris RAHHHHHH 🦅🫵🗣️‼️
ynusername RAHHH RAHHH RAHHH RISE POWER POWER 💪🏻‼️
user63 what the fuck
user64 OH GOD WHAT IF SHES DATING HIM????
ynusername brother eughhhh
landonorris WHAT THE FUCK????
user65 SINCE WHEN IS SHE FRIENDS WITH F1 DRIVERS HOW MANY CHAPTWRS DID I MISS
user66 apparently we all went into a universal coma while she was out galavanting cause idk how else this could've happened
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maxverstappen1 posted to his story!
(caption: beautiful show)
22,456 replies
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user67 someone save my girl bro, she don't know any better 😭
user68 it's like a little kid trying to touch the hot stove, LIKE STOP THAT!! DON'T DO THAT
user69 am i the only one who thinks they'd be cute together....
user70 YES!?!?
user71 there is literally no fucking way he bagged her
user72 losing y/n to european f1 driver would be the biggest american tragedy since 2001
user73 i had to read this shit twice, op what r u waffling abt 🫵😧
user74 can't even be nonchalant about this one bro, i'm chalanting hard asf
user75 we do not care
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liked by redbullracing, f1, and 78,567 others
tagged maxverstappen1
ynusername first time in monaco, safe to say i enjoyed myself! so happy to see you shine this time my love<3
25,788 comments
user76 oh. my. fucking. god
user77 THEYRE FUCKING DATING OH MYFODNSJ
user78 THAT SHOULD BE MEEEE HOLDING YOUR HAND THAT SHOULD BE MEEE MAKING YOU LAUGHHH 🎤
user79 i'm in mourning
sabrinacarpenter CHEATER 🫵
ynusername BABY IT'S NOT WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE, IT WAS JUST ONE TIME 😣😣😣 IT WAS A MISTAKE
maxverstappen1 we've been dating for 2 years??
sabrinacarpenter SHUT UP FAST & FURIOUS NO ONE ASKED YOU
user80 i'm sorry 😃 two Y EARS
user81 i feel like i just got dumped. y/n don't do this, the kids need you 😔
maxverstappen1 i got p1 for you, i love you 🫶🏼
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hope you all enjoyed! please let me know your thoughts and feel free to leave a request for me to write something for your fav <3
#f1 x female reader#f1 x reader#f1 x y/n#formula 1#f1#f1 smut#f1 x you#formula one#f1 imagine#f1 smau#max verstappen smau#max verstappen x reader#max verstappen#max verstappen x you#max verstappen x y/n
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For fucks sake don’t vote 3rd party.
I would LOVE to not have a 2 party system. It’s a cancer on our country and we need to take action to dismantle it, but just pretending like the bad thing already doesn’t exist anymore and making decisions based on that is a TERRIBLE idea. It won’t change shit and it’ll just prevent us from making actual headway. Trump will win if Kamala doesn’t, that’s the system we live in, the notion that that 200 year old monster of a problem is gonna change in 100 days is absolutely absurd. So let’s just establish that before going any further.
I see people all the time saying to vote 3rd party because “Kamala is just as bad as Trump, democrats just wanna LOOK progressive.” (And before that it was Biden but you get my gist.) because of Biden’s deplorable refusal to stop arming Israel. Respectfully, no tf she’s not, even by just a hair. Kamala isn’t the one with a laundry list of straight up legal atrocities she’s publicly planning to commit if she wins. Being genuinely scared of project 2025 and worrying about ourselves because of that isn’t proof that someone calling for a free Palestine is performative. Genuinely, GENUINELY, what the hell do you think is gonna happen to Palestine if Trump wins? Letting our own country possibly be set back several steps and many of our own citizens’ lives be destroyed to “take a stand” for Palestine when it won’t do shit to help them is just as performative. Actually it’s infinitely MORE performative.
#go vote#democrat#us politics#politics#thoughts#us elections#kamala harris#joe biden#donald trump#free palestine#performative#critical#biceratops#project 2025
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New Year, Same Bullshit
Pairing: Toxic Babydaddy!Terry Richmond x Plus Size Fem Black!OC
Wordcount: +3.8K
Warnings: MDNI (18+) mature content, such as cursing, teasing, heavily dialogue-centered, use of pet names (Daddy, Mama, baby girl, lil' mama, pretty girl, good boy, etc.), oral (male receiving), P in V, Toxic Dom!Terry *if you squint and turn your head*, cum play *sort of*, brattiness galore, facials *no spa*🤭
A/N¹: This is a single one-shot with no planned sequels.
A/N²: I'm open to critiques. I am a little 🤏🏽 sensitive about my writing. Please, don't be too harsh.🥺 Feel free to bring my attention to any typos. Divider by ME (theereina). Also, this work is not to be plagiarized or reposted (on any site other than here on Tumblr). I do NOT give consent for any form of republishing or rewriting.
Masterlist: 🔥🔥🔥
ding
Terry: I hope all is well. My mom told me she has TJ. Hope you enjoy yourself tonight.
Me: I hope I do, too.
Terry: I was thinking about something earlier.
Me: ???
Terry: New Year, new us?
I paused for a second in disbelief. I knew this man was not trying this bullshit tonight. I guess this year's motto was “new year, same bullshit”. I sat there for a second and stared at myself in my vanity's mirror.
I could feel the petty in me rising. I texted Terry back with nothing but ill intentions. “New year, new us”, huh?
Me: Nah. New year, and new dick. Cheers to 2025!🥂✨
I waited until I knew Terry saw the message and blocked his number. I knew I was pushing Terry's buttons but oh well.
2 hours later
“Lele, ain't that Terry?” asked one of the women who came out with me and my best friend.
“Aww, hell. Lele, it is him. He's coming this way, and he looks pissed!” my best friend, Tyler, said.
“I don't care. What he gonna do? Whoop me!” I laughed out loud, spinning to see Terry barreling through the crowd.
I stopped dancing when I saw his face. Maybe, I shouldn't have said that.
“Terry, wait? I didn't mean—,” I said as soon as he stood before me.
“Nah… You meant that shit. New dick, huh?” Terry said, eyeing me down.
As much as I was scared for my life, I was hoping that this night would end the way I wanted it to. Fuck! I needed this.
“You think that shit was funny? Ty, y'all here alone, or did she come with someone?” he asked, looking towards Tyler.
“Terry, I didn't come h—,” I started to speak.
Terry's eyes darted back to meet mine.
“Love, I wasn't talking to you. I asked Tyler. When I want you to speak, I'll let you know.”
“Oh, shit. He not playing with her ass,” said one of the women in the group.
“Yes, we came alone. No, she didn't come here with anyone. I promise,” Tyler said, looking at me.
“I can't believe you're doing this shit right now,” I mumbled under my breath.
“What did you say? I couldn't hear you,” Terry spat, glaring down at me.
“Nothing,” I whispered.
“Yeah, that's what the fuck I thought. Enjoy yourself, sweetheart. I'll be waiting for you when you get home,” he said, holding the back of my head and kissing my forehead.
“Huh? You don't live with me,” I uttered in confusion.
“I still have my key, and I pay the bills there. Don't I? Oh, okay then. Like I said, I'll see you when you get home,” he said, letting me go.
“Oh, and do me a favor, love. Don't drink too much. I need you alert and responsive tonight,” Terry said, walking away.
As I watched Terry leave, I felt my heart racing. There was no calming down from this.
“Fuck me!” I yelled quietly as soon as Terry was out of sight.
“Girl, what the fuck did you do this time?” Tyler asked me, handing me a drink.
I looked at the fruity concoction like it was poison. I knew this sugary ass shit wasn't going to do anything to call my nerves. I shrugged my shoulders and swallowed the drink in two full gulps.
“Damn! That man finna tear yo' ass up. Ain't he?” one of the women asked while laughing.
“You don't even know the half. Tyler, can you keep yo’ godson tomorrow? I got a funny feeling I'm not gonna be straight after tonight,” I asked Tyler, searching her eyes for sympathy.
“Yeah, I got my baby. Now, you just tell me what the fuck you did,” she said, raising an eyebrow.
“Oh, Ty. I think I fucked up this time,” I said, shaking my head. I pulled her over to one of the couches in the section, hoping that I could talk to her privately.
As I proceeded to tell Tyler what happened, I could see her face shift from concern to amusement.
“Why do you look like you wanna laugh?” I asked when I finished.
“Uh, sis… How did he know where you were?” Tyler asked, looking at me with concern.
“I don't… I don't know. How the fuck did he know I was here?” I asked, questioning myself more than Tyler.
4 nerve-racking hours later
I had literally spent all night trying to come up with a reason not to come home. I knew that whatever was on the other side of that door was going to be— something memorable.
I made sure to stop drinking hours ago. His “alert and responsive” remark was a warning that only WE understood. My insides were screaming because I knew Terry had a way of breaking me down and putting me back together again in the most— sensual and pleasurable way. Yes, there may be pain involved, but I couldn't care less.
I was well aware of what came with provoking Terry. At this point, it was a game for me, and my prize was always the best dick a girl could ever ask for. That was definitely the one thing I missed about having Terry living at home— the in-house, on-demand dick. Always hard, and always ready.
It was a little after 4 in the morning. I was pushing my luck coming in this late, but I might as well fully enjoy what may be my last night out for a while. I was either about to get fucked up, be fucked, or both.
After realizing that Terry's truck was nowhere to be found, I scanned the streets to see if he parked there instead. Nothing.
I reluctantly began walking to the door. How was this possible? Even the walk up to my front door was causing me anxiety. Every goddamn step felt like I was approaching the gates of hell. Was I really letting this man make me feel like a child coming home when they know they're getting an ass whooping? Yes.
I slowed my steps and began putting my hair in a ponytail. If it's one thing I knew, this ponytail may save my life. Then again, it may do the opposite. Aww, fuck!
I tossed my heels and purse into one hand while adjusting my keys with the other. Placing the key into the keyhole, I quietly unlocked the door. I paused before opening the door, praying that Terry wasn't standing on the other side.
Sliding inside as quickly as I could, I tiptoed inside the house and locked the door. From what I could see, he wasn't in the living room or the kitchen. I took a deep breath and relaxed my shoulders. I stood quietly in an attempt to possibly hear if he was somewhere in the house. I flattened my back against the door since I was still unsure of my surroundings.
From somewhere to the right of me, I heard something dart towards me. I turned around in a panic. Right as I was about to make a run for it, I saw that the culprit had a tail. I WAS ABOUT TO RUN FROM MY DAMN CAT!!!
I took a deep breath and leaned down to pick up the cat. But… As soon as my knees hit the floor, I felt a hand on the back of my head. I screamed out in shock, startling the cat.
“Oh, nah. Shit that shit up! I told you I would be waiting for you. Didn't I?” Terry growled, pulling me by my ponytail.
Like I said. The ponytail was a gift and a curse.
“Just…” I yelled, grabbing his hands in my hair.
“Touch me again. I dare you. Imma do more than tie yo’ ass up!” Terry said, holding my face to look up at him.
“Terry, I'm sorry. I was just jo—!” I started, letting my hands fall beside me.
“That was supposed to be a joke. Ha! We gone see what's funny in a minute.” Terry said, letting go of my hair.
As much as my brain was telling me to run, my pussy was begging me to stay even more.
Terry's hand wrapped around my forearm. “Stand up!” he barked.
“Please, I said I’m—,” I said, standing to my feet.
“If I have to tell you to shut up again…” Terry said, pulling me to face him.
I used the back of my hand to wipe the tears that were now falling.
“I hope you don't think those tears are stopping shit. Ain't no sense in crying. You did this to yourself, Alicia. I was trying to be nice to you, but you just don't know when to leave me the fuck alone,” Terry said, stepping closer to me.
I gulped as he glared at me, blinking slowly. Every breath he released was hot and heavy— weighed down in anger. It's as if he was battling to control himself.
“You thought that shit was so cute. Didn't you? I bet you and your little friends had a good laugh at that, huh?” Terry said, leaning down and resting his forehead on mine.
“You can speak, now. Choose your words wisely,” he said. He straightened his posture and stood to his full height, holding his hands in front of him.
“I'm sorry. I didn't tell anyone but Tyler. I swear,” I spat out as quickly as I could.
Terry paused to look at me. His eyes darkened in lust and anger. I let my gaze drop to the floor.
“Nah, you know better. Eyes on me at all times, right?” Terry demanded.
“Yes,” I said, trailing my eyes up Terry's body. I let my gaze linger on the bulge that had grown in his jeans.
“Unh unh. You gone see that in a minute. Look at me, Alicia!” Terry said, forcing me to look at him.
I rubbed my forearm nervously. I waited for Terry to say something else. Instead, he turned on his heels and sat on the couch.
Leaning back on the couch, he placed his arm over the back. “Better yet. Come here and bring your phone with you,” he said, motioning for me to approach him.
I slowly picked up my phone from the floor and walked up to him. I stood between his legs. He dropped his gaze to the floor, letting me know to kneel. I kneeled in front of him while never breaking eye contact.
“Good girl. Thank you for finally listening. Give me your phone.”
Handing him my phone, my mind immediately started to race. I knew if this man went through that phone. My ass was grass!
“Terry, wait!” I yelled, stopping him.
“Oh, you must be hiding something. You are crazy as hell if you think I can't go through a phone that I pay for every month. However, that's the least of my concerns right now,” he scoffed, tossing the phone beside him on the couch.
“I just… I… I know that… if…,” I stuttered.
“Don't even worry about it, love. Because after tonight, it won't matter what nigga is in that phone. You'll know who you belong to. I can promise you that.”
Terry leaned forward, grabbing the side of my face firmly. I gasped in anticipation.
“I don't understand why you choose to play with me, baby girl. Here I am asking for my family back, and your ass wants to play these childish ass games.”
“Terry, baby. I—,” I said before he placed his hand around the front of my throat. I instantly shut my mouth.
“Look at that! How sweet. I didn't even have to do it, and you knew.” Terry said, biting his bottom lip. He moaned as he watched me. He was more than thrilled with my natural obedience.
Moving his hand to cup my chin, he let his thumb trace the silhouette of my bottom lip.
“Mmm… Daddy misses these lips. The way they look, the way they feel— everything!”
Terry's hand let go of my chin as he sank back into the couch. I watched fervently as he undid his belt. Making quick work of his pants, he freed himself from the confinement of his boxers.
I eyed his dick, waiting for his permission to even touch it.
“I told you you'd get to see it. Unfortunately, touching it ain't an option. At least not right now, especially with that foul mouth of yours.”
My face dropped in disbelief as I began to pout.
“What you will get to do is watch me. Watch me while I… uh… make you wish it was you handling this for me.” Terry laughed while lifting my head back up to watch him.
So, it begins. This is the part where he breaks me.
Terry wrapped his hand firmly around the base of his dick. “All you had to do was behave, but you just can't. I bet you'll be on your best fuckin’ behavior after tonight.”
Terry's hand stroked the length of his shaft. His contentment was already evident as small droplets of precum began to leak from his tip.
I rested my hands on my thighs, pressing my fingertips into the cushion of my thighs. I was fighting the urge to lick what I felt was mine; however, I knew that wouldn't end the way I wanted. Licking my tongue out, I let it slide across the flesh of my bottom lip.
Terry grunted in response. My eyes darted from his dick to his face. His eyes were low and wanton. He was just as needy as I was. Our gazes locked in fervor, passing a mutual message that intensified the salacious hunger between us.
Terry's hand sped up and tightened around his head. His grunts grew deeper and more primal. He was feigning to cum.
I tilted my head and lowered my gaze, pleading with my eyes. Sitting here with my hands in my lap wasn't enough for me. I whined while wiggling my hips, trying to feel something to help the ache between my legs.
“Fuck! You got 3 minutes to make me cum or else!” Terry said, leaning up and grabbing the back of my head.
He didn't even have to finish his movement. My mouth was on his dick before he could even grab me. I was horny, I was needy, and most importantly, I was hungry.
I took all of Terry in on a single inhale not giving a fuck about my throat. I needed this. I let saliva fall from my mouth and down the sides of his shaft. Pulling back, I hollowed out my cheeks and created a vacuum around the head of Terry's dick.
“Ahhh, fuck. You… you always know… ugh.. exactly what to do, baby girl. That's right. This dick is yours, mama. Ahhh, shit. Keep going, baby,” Terry said, stroking the side of my face.
I moaned around his dick. Swallowing his full length again with pride, I smiled around him. Opening my mouth slowly, I sunk down further until my nose hit the patch of hair he grew there. Relaxing every muscle in my throat I let him sit in the back of my throat while I hummed and moaned in pleasure. This… this was the ache I was seeking. This was what I wanted to feel— the burn and stretch of this very moment.
I pulled off of Terry with a pop, watching as a thin string of saliva and cum fell from my lips. Grabbing him mid-shaft, I began to jerk his dick. Fully consumed by my own pleasure, I failed to immediately take notice of Terry's silence.
I looked up to see Terry's eyes closed as he released a slew of low, rough moans. I instantly put my mouth back on him, focusing solely on his head. Using my tongue to massage his tip, I was hoping to push Terry over the edge.
Watching him closely, I marveled at the sight before me. His head had rolled back on his shoulders, and his bottom lip was tucked in between his teeth. As I felt Terry's dick begin to pulse, I took him into the back of my throat again. I wanted every drop of him, and I was going to make sure I got it.
Letting him paint the back of my throat was the only thing on my mind. I started sucking Terry like my life depended on it. His hand gripped the back of my head, but even that didn't stop me. I rested my hands on Terry's legs for support as I put my all into it.
As soon as I felt like the first drops of cum were about to make an appearance, Terry grunted and pulled me back. His dick fell from my mouth and into his own hands. Leaning my head back, Terry stroked himself twice before erupting— all over my face.
I closed my eyes, feeling the warm sticky substance coat my eyelashes along with my forehead, nose, and lips. I exhaled as I thanked God that I closed my eyes in time.
“Open your mouth and stick out your tongue!” Terry barked as I felt him moving around.
I opened my mouth and felt him push his dick inside again. Resting the full weight of his dick on my tongue, he told me to keep my mouth open.
“Smile!” he said as I heard a camera shutter.
Without a second thought, my eyes shot open.
“For memories. Adding it to the stash.”
Of course! That's what the fuck he wanted the phone for. I pulled back, letting his dick fall out. “I told you that you're mine. Didn't I?” he said, leaning up.
“Oh, don't think we're done either. Stand up!” he nodded.
I rose to my feet, wobbling. As I stood before Terry, I went to wipe my face. His hand reached out to grab my hand.
“Nah, baby girl. You gone wear that shit with pride. I plan on marking my territory in more ways than one. There will be no creampies tonight,” he warns, standing from the couch.
“But Terry I—,” I said.
His arms wrapped around my waist as he lifted me. Wrapping my legs around him, he turned to walk towards the hallway. My body practically melted into him as I clung to his back. I began to whine and moan while kissing his neck.
“Daddy missed this pussy— MY pussy,” Terry moaned as his hands pushed the strapless dress I wore up past my stomach. The thin fabric began bunching up.
“Ahhh, mmmm. Fuck!” I moaned, placing my hands around his neck.
As we approached the bedroom door, Terry didn't even reach to open it. Instead, he opted for kicking it open.
“Don't worry. I'll fix it!” he grinned.
Walking to the foot of the bed, he laid me directly in the middle. He stepped back and completely undressed himself. God Lord, I missed this body.
I leaned up and began kissing and touching his abdomen. Moving my hands out of the way, Terry's hands went to the neckline of the dress as he leaned over me. In one swift move, he tore the top of the dress in half, continuing to tear the fabric from my body until nothing was left.
While I was preoccupied with my own thoughts, he pushed me down onto the bed. Climbing onto the bed and settling between my thighs, he wrapped my legs around his waist.
Looking at me with the most sinful smirk, he entered me in one thrust. I gasped out in both pain and pleasure. We hadn't had sex in over four months. The feeling of him stretching my pussy out sent my eyes rolling into the back of my head.
“You gone feel me tonight, baby. All of me,” he said, leaning down to kiss my neck.
Pulling every inch of his dick out to the tip, he inserted himself again. He was clearly on a mission.
Thrust after thrust…
“So, you gone give my pussy away? Huh? Answer me when I'm talkin' to you!” he said, thrusting into me harder.
“No!” I yelled as my back arched off the bed.
Using nothing but his body weight, Terry flattened me out again. “No, ma'am.” He said, pulling out to thrust back in again. “The fuck you moving for? You gone take this dick. It's yours, ain't?” he asked, kissing my chin.
“Yes, this… this is… ahhh, fuckkk… This is my dick!” I screamed out as he pounded into me. Every thrust knocked the syllables from my lips.
“That's right. This your dick, baby. All of it! Every fuckin' inch, mama! Now, what you gone do with it, huh?” he growled in my ear, taunting me.
“I'm… gonna… fuckin'… take… it!” I whimpered. His thrusts began to pick up speed.
“Good girl, and you gone let me cum wherever I want to, right?” Terry coaxed, hitting my g-spot over and over again.
“Yes!” I yelled, clawing at Terry's back.
I was so close to cumming, and this shit felt so damn good. Hell, I'd even let him cum on my face again.
“I knew my baby would. Who pussy this is, mama?” he asked, smirking.
“Yours! For… ever! Terry, please! Can… ohhhh… can I cum?” I begged as I felt my climax quickly approaching.
“You better wet this dick up, too. Come on, baby.” Terry uttered softly, talking me through it. “Oouu… look at my baby,” he said, fucking me through my orgasm.
“Terry!” I moaned out, digging into his forearms.
“Look at that shit! Wet as fuck!” he said, watching himself slip in and out.
“Yes! Shit! Ohhh, fuck!” I gasped as he slowed his strokes.
“Yeah! Just like that. You ready? Tell Daddy that you're ready,” he groaned clearly at his peak.
“Please, Daddy! Cum for me!” I yelled.
Terry pulled out, aiming straight for my pussy and stomach. I watched intently as ropes of cum landed on my lower abdomen and the mound of my pussy. Using his dick, Terry began to mix the remainder of his cum into my own. He beamed as he created a disgusting and sloppy mess between my legs.
“I wish you could see it, baby. It's so pretty,” he said, looking up. His eyes roamed over the entirety of my body, lingering on the areas covered in his cum. “You look so pretty, mama,” Terry praised.
“I know I do, and it's all because of you,” I said, pulling Terry in for a kiss.
Taglist: @episodes-ff @babybratzmaraj @persethegawd @pocketsizedpanther @writingsbytee @kimuzostar @confessionsofadramaqueenn @luvrsluxe @blackmoonchilee @meannaim @nayaesworld @msdmc1 @megamindsecretlair @nahimjustfeelingit-writes @mymindisneverhere @brattyfics @avoidthings @honeytoffee @peachbuttetfly @melaninadorned @theglamclosetsl @simplyzeeka @dxddykenn @charismablu @blackerthings @slutsareteacherstoo @vivaalenaa @becauseimswagman1 @keehendrixx @teeresaresa @beenathembo @inthekeyofshe @notapradagurl7 @blowmymbackout
This taglist is random and sort of thrown together. Sorry.😔
#thee reina writes#terry richmond#aaron pierre#terry richmond fanfiction#terry richmond fic#terry richmond smut#aaron pierre fanfic#aaron pierre smut#aaron pierre fic#toxic!terry richmond#x black reader#x black oc#x black fem reader#x black fem oc#x black plus size reader#x black plus size oc#x black!reader#x black!oc#x black!fem!reader#x black!fem!oc#black!reader#black!oc#black!fem!reader#black!fem!oc#plus size!reader#plus size!oc#terry richmond x black reader#terry richmond x black oc#terry richmond x black female reader#terry richmond x black female oc
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santa doesn't know you like i do
"i wonder if santa could bring a whole damn 6ft man this midnight" you said, pouring yourself another glass of red wine.
"...is that what you wished for this christmas?" anton, your best friend asked. he seems concerned & LOOKS concerned.
"i mean, i can't really think of anything i want for christmas except for an intelligent, hot, athletic, 6foot man to ruin my 2025." you said
you & anton have been friends since your womb era considering the fact that both of your parents have been friends for decades.
your friendship is basically fixed & y'all can't do anything about it anymore. proven & tested when you tried to cut him off during elementary after stabbing his arm with a pencil but you found each other in one dining table the next evening.
now that your parents wanted some time to themselves, the "kids" are left to take care of the house this christmas eve.
now, you're sitting on the couch next to anton, trying to figure out how the hell would santa fit in the chimney.
"you brought the cookies out, didn't you?" you asked, checking the table near the tree.
"for santa? are we seriously gonna do that?" anton asked, looking at you like you're some 5-year-old.
"um, no? it's for my future husband that he's bringing over." you rolled your eyes jokingly.
"what did you wish for anyway?" you asked
"i wished for someone to like me back" anton said, sitting back comfortably, looking at the ceiling.
silence.
anton waited for your response but you weren't saying anything. curious (and nervous), anton looked at you to check your reaction.
there you are, spacing out.
"what's on your mind?" anton asked, popping your lil bubble.
"how the hell would santa grant that? it's not like he can put that in a box & leave it under the tree" you said
anton laughed loudly for a minute or two which made you think that he's going insane.
anton, on the other hand, found your thoughts funny. he expected you to tease him about his lil crush or ask him about who it is. but instead, you were worrying about santa.
"i can't think of anything else. plus, i don't really believe in santa." anton replied
silence.
but this time, it was because the conversation was done. silence has never been awkward with anton which is mainly why you've learned to love anton's company.
his presence doesn't make you worry about what you're gonna say next nor how you're gonna continue the conversation. you can just exist in one place in silence & it can be the best hours of your day.
"what exactly did you write to santa?" anton asked, looking at you. for some reason, you felt nervous to look back & engage in eye contact so you stared at the tree.
"good morning, santa. if i'm on your good kid list, i'd like to have a good company for christmas. preferably a 6ft man in his 20s, smart, nice, soft spoken, family oriented, athletic, and hot. thank you, santa. merry christmasㅡ with a bunch of hearts" you recited from your memory.
"that's basically me" anton whispered
"huh? are you badmouthing me on christmas?" you raised your brow
"i said that your wish is not that specific" he said sarcastically.
"santa observed me for years as a good kid, he knows me & he knows my type" you rolled your eyes jokingly at him
"i've been with you for more than a decade, i think i know you more than santa" anton mindlessly replied
"your point being?" you asked
anton gulped. he doesn't know what he's going to say & confessing to his longtime crush is definitely not part of his 2024 bingo card.
"that i'm more than qualified than santa in fulfilling your wish" anton said confidently, succeeding in hiding his nervousness (at least in his end)
"i don't think any of your friends fit the criteria" you said, lowkey hoping that anton will offer himself
"i do" and he did
"huh?"
"i fit your criteria, don't i? am i not enough as a christmas gift?" anton teased, leaning over to your side of the couch. anton's confidence grew once he saw how flustered you are.
"hahaha what are you saying? stop it hahahaㅡ i wonder if they're home? i'll checkㅡ" you said, standing up to go to the front door. your face is obviously heating up from the unexpected turn of events.
"i like you" anton interrupted you. you stood frozen to your spot, looking at anton who's already looking at you.
"i love our little moments together like how we spent hours just walking around town last weekend, talking about everything and nothing at the same time. you make the most random things feel important." anton smiled while recalling your little moments together. you couldn't help but smile as well.
"it's the way you laugh at your own jokes, even when no one else does. it's honestly one of my favorite things. you'll say something dumb, then look at me with that "I know it was bad but I’m laughing anyway" expression, and I’ll always laugh too, because I get it. " anton said, slightly teasing you. you rolled your eyes jokingly, chuckling of how accurate he is as if he has read your mind during those moments.
"also, right, you've always hated wearing those big jackets in the winter, but I know you’d never leave the house without it because someone else might be cold. i mean, you always let someone borrow your jacket without a second thoughtㅡyou act like it’s no big deal, but I know it’s because you don’t mind being a little uncomfortable if it means someone else feels better." anton continued.
his words warmed your heart. you didn't know that he noticed that.
"is that why you always wear two jackets and i somehow find a magic jacket on my shoulder?" you laughed
"yeah, and you always tease me about how dramatic i am for wearing two jackets." anton sighed
"you could've just made me hold the other jacket just in case" you said
"you hate holding stuffㅡ it's always ME who's holding your bag anywhere" anton quickly rebutted which made you zip your mouth.
anton chuckled and continued.
"anyway, i admire your perspective on different things & how you view people. it's like, no matter how messy the situation looks, you always manage to find the good in it. you see beauty in the things other people might miss, like how you can walk through a crowded street and notice a little detail, like the color of someone’s shoes or the way a kid is laughing, that makes everything feel lighter. " he said.
"there’s something about the way you move through the world—so real, so unbothered, but always with purpose—that makes me want to be better too."
anton said, looking at you sincerely.
"i can’t help but fall more for the person you are when no one’s looking. I’m not sure when it happened, but somewhere along the way, you became someone I want to know more, be more, and be with." anton said, walking closer to you.
"so.. merry christmas?" anton laughed the awkwardness off.
"i don't know what to say, i'm really bad at words" you said, tearing up
"obviously, i'm aware. you're not obligated to say anythingㅡ i just wanted toㅡ i just felt likeㅡ" anton's words were soon interrupted by you.
"i love you. like, fuck it, i stabbed you with a pencil when we were 7 because i was sad because you didn't like me" you confessed. you were so close to crying because of anton's words and anton just stood there, laughing his ass off.
"you're pretty violent..." anton said, acting so offended
"h-heyㅡ"
"i'm sorry for the late confession. i should've known." anton suddenly said. he was about to say more but you immediately interrupted him with a hug.
"...maybe i should start believing in santa" anton chuckled, burying his face on your neck.
"merry christmas, ant." you said, breaking the hug to look at him.
"oh my god. thank you, santa" anton said, completely taken away by your beauty & by the thought of how the situation escalated to this.
you laughed at how chaotic he is. the anton you love, the anton you've loved that seemed to have never changedㅡ and you're glad that he didn't.
"i actually wrote your name on my santa wishlist" you confessed
"good to know. after all, santa won't give you somebody that loves you more than me".
#riize#kpop#anton#riize is 7#anton lee#riize anton#anton x reader#riize x reader#riize imagines#anton riize#kpop imagines#kpop scenarios#riize kpop#anton as your boyfriend#anton au#anton ff#riize anton au#riize anton imagines#christmas imagines#Spotify
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Part 4: Warning Bells
Masterlist - Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 5 - Part 6 - Part 7 - Part 8 - Part 9 - Part 10 - Part 11 - Part 12 - Part 13
I don't think I can do this again (do you remember it too?)
(In which a self-admittedly all over the place writer takes you on a bit of a rollercoaster)
Pairing: Paige Bueckers X Azzi Fudd
Themes: Fluff, Angst, Pining (the usuals)
Words: 6.1K
TW: Swearing, Mentions of Divorce
A/N: Hi lovelies :) Guess who made a deadline again? I'm as shocked as y'all are but I do wanna just warn y'all that August is gonna be really busy for me so as much as I'm gonna try to stick to schedule, there's a pretty good chance I won't. I really appreciate y'alls feedback with live-reacts/long reviews and it's truly the motivating factor behind my writing so pretty please keep sending them. I did edit (as usual) but please let me know the most likely existent typos anyway. As always, let me know what you liked, disliked and what you wanna see next. Have a lovely rest of your week my loves <3
March 2033
Here’s what Azzi has learned about motherhood: having kids means that there will come many times in your life, when you will look around you and wonder how the hell did I get here. It’s that thought that’s currently plaguing her as she finishes hanging up the WELCOME HOME banner on the living room wall in her ex-girlfriend’s new apartment. And when she’s talking about kids, she’s not talking about her five year old who’s currently sticking purple hearts on every surface she can find. No, she’s talking about her 6’5 teammate who she’d once “adopted” as a joke in college, but who’s basically become her surrogate child ever since they’d ended up on the same WNBA team.
It had started as a casual conversation when Jana, as she often did, had shown up for an impromptu lunch. The topic of Paige was hard to avoid considering it was Stephie’s favorite subject, heightened by the fact that Paige was coming back soon and Stephie was far too excited to finally have her Miss Buecks back. Jana was more than happy to indulge the little girl in conversation about what Paige had been like at UConn. And if Azzi had lost herself in those memories for a moment, transported back in time to a world that had once been blooming with promise before wilting in a darkness she’d created herself, well, she’d done an excellent job not letting it show on her face.
The real issue had started when Jana had casually let slip her idea of surprising Paige with a little welcome party. And as Stephie had started reciting all the different things they could do -because of course me and Mama will help you Aunty J, Azzi had glared at Jana, only to receive an innocent smile in return that told her everything she needed to know. She’d been set up.
That’s how, instead of spending her Saturday curled up on her comfortable couch with a book in her hands, Azzi is here instead and in true fashion, she’s the only one actually getting anything done. Jana, who had just left about twenty minutes ago to pick Paige up, had invited some of the other girls on the team to come help out yet, something about more hands on deck. Those supposed helpful hands had spent the last hour blowing up and popping balloons and getting nothing else done.
“I can’t believe y’all have me decorating for the woman who cost me my first national championship,” Joyce laments, “I still have nightmares from that game.”
“You gotta let that hurt go Aunty Joy,” Stephie says impishly, mimicking what Jana would normally say whenever the infamous 2025 South Carolina vs UConn national championship got brought up.
“Don’t sass me Miss Stephanie,” Joyce sticks out her tongue at the little girl, throwing a purple balloon at Stephie’s head, “hasn’t your Mama taught you that we don’t mock people’s pain.”
“Ignore her Steph,” Tessa says, bumping her former Gamecock teammate as she shares a devilish grin with Azzi’s daughter, “she’s just upset she only won one. Some of us have two.”
Joyce guffaws, throwing another balloon, this time aimed at Tessa, “dude we’re supposed to be on the same team. What would Coach Staley say to you teaming with UConn people of all things to bully me?”
“She’d thank me for making sure you didn’t get a big head,” Tessa snipes back.
Whatever response Joyce has to that quip is cut short by the doorbell ringing and Azzi feels her heartbeat quicken as Stephie lets out a squeal, dropping everything to go answer it. Things had been different since the facetime call almost two weeks ago. They’d accidentally on purpose settled into a routine where Stephie would call Paige at exactly 7 p.m. and Paige would answer on the first ring, promising to stay on the phone till the little girl fell asleep. And it would’ve been fine if that’s all it was. But then Paige started staying on the phone till after Stephie fell asleep and suddenly it was like they were back to their teenage selves, talking about everything and nothing, trying to learn every page of each other’s story all over again.
Azzi had missed so much about Paige in the last couple of years but there was nothing she’d missed more than just talking to her best friend. She’d missed the way Paige would tell a story, going off on a million tangents in between. She’d missed the way her eyes would light up when she got to a particularly exciting part of the story, specks of gold shimmering in the blue like sunlight hitting the ocean. She’d missed the way Paige’s hands would be flying animatedly all over the place, even when she was whispering. She’d missed the way the blonde would pause halfway through to observe if Azzi was still listening, making sure all of the attention was still on her. And she’d missed the way that when it was Azzi’s turn to speak, Paige would hang onto every word like it was gospel, intently listening like she’d never forgive herself if she couldn’t recite everything Azzi had just said from memory. She’d missed the way Paige would let her emotions freely flicker across her face, because whatever happened to Azzi, Paige felt it too.
She’d missed and missed, convinced the pain would be the end of her, until she’d tricked her mind into forgetting. And now Azzi’s beginning to realize that remembering it all again, might just be the thing that kills her.
“Nevermind,” Stephie walks back to the room, sulking slightly, “it’s just Aunty Liyah.”
“Oh thanks Stephie babe. That makes me feel so wonderful,” Aaliyah says, walking in behind Stephie with an offended expression on her face, “and here I thought bringing cupcakes would make me popular.”
“Tell me those are store-bought Chavez. I ain’t trusting them if you made them yourselves,” Joyce says, side-eyeing the cupcakes.
“Trust me I would never waste my precious time baking for y’all ungrateful ass-”
“Aaliyah,” Azzi shoots her younger teammate a sharp look.
“-ungrateful people,” Aaliyah corrects sheepishly, “cupcakes because y’all clearly don’t appreciate me.”
“I pre-ciate you Aunty Liyah,” Stephie says innocently, trying to get a better look at the aforementioned cupcakes, “you got the pu-ple ones right? They have to be pu-ple for Miss Buecks.”
Aaliyah bends down to Stephie’s level to show her the box of sweet treats “the perfect purple cupcakes for your Miss Buecks. How come you never wanna do nice things like this for us Stephie?”
“Because Miss Buecks is special,” Stephie retorts matter-of-factly.
“Oh so we’re not special?” Tessa asks, raising an eyebrow at Stephie.
“‘Course you are but Miss Buecks is special-er.”
And while her teammates all pretend to dramatically gasp at that, shaking their heads at Stephie, Azzi feels like someone’s squeezing her heart, twisting and twisting but never fully breaking it. She wonders if that might hurt less.
It’s another 10 minutes later when the doorbell rings again and Azzi watches her daughter’s face break into an incandescent grin, filled with hope, as she rushes to open the door because it has to be Paige this time. Azzi follows after her, trying to keep her breathing under control as anticipation clings to her nerves. Azzi’s gotten so spectacularly good at lying to herself that she tells herself this next one with ease: there’s not a single part of her that’s eager to see Paige again.
“SURPRISE,” Stephie screams, flinging the front door open with as much strength as she can muster. She doesn’t give Paige a chance to react before she’s throwing herself against the blonde’s legs, hugging her thighs.
It takes a second for Paige to register what’s happening, but when she does, it’s Azzi she’s looking at. Everything seems to move in slow motion as they stare at each other, the reality of the moment suddenly settling in. Paige is here. In Oakland. They’re going to be teammates; they’re going to see each other almost every day. Just like they used to. Except nothing is like it used to be and as that bitter truth comes up like bile in Azzi’s throat, she has to force herself to look away.
“Miss Buecks,” Stephie calls out, tugging at the hem of Paige’s white shirt to get her attention, “do you like my surprise?”
Paige tears her eyes away from Azzi, leaning down to pick Stephie up before peppering her faces with kisses and making the younger girl squeal in delight, “best surprise ever.”
And Azzi really, really, can’t watch this. Not when it makes her want to walk over and cocoon herself in with the two of them, makes her want to pretend that she’s living in another life, one where she hadn’t thrown away the chance of a happily ever after with the girl she’d fallen in love with at fourteen,
“Oh yeah Stephie, your surprise. Take all the credit. Not like the rest of us did anything,” Joyce rolls her eyes goodnaturedly, before pulling Paige into a one-armed hug, “welcome to the Bay Area Bueckers.”
Tessa and Aaliyah are next, both sharing warm hugs with their new teammate. Once they’ve had their turn, all eyes seem to turn to Azzi expectantly and the brunette blanches under their gaze. Other than Jana, who suddenly seems pretty heavily interested in the doorframe, the rest of her teammates don’t know about her past with Paige. So it’s only natural they’d expect her to greet Paige with all the cordiality of an old friend.
“Y’all good?” Joyce asks slowly, looking between the two of them, “do you want me to introduce y’all or?”
“Shut up,” Azzi murmurs before drawing in a deep breath and stepping towards Paige. She tries not to fixate on the way Paige’s jaw flexes when the blonde swallows, tries not to think about all the patterns she’d once carved against that little patch of skin because she knew it drove Paige insane. The thing is Azzi can’t even really remember the last time they hugged beyond a for-the-cameras one at a game. But as she wraps her arms around Paige, the older woman’s breath tickling against her ear as she grips Azzi’s waist, it doesn’t feel that much different from how it used to be. Paige’s arms are still safe and strong and Azzi still wants to melt into them. But what’s different is that Stephie’s in between them now, tiny hands securely fastened around both of their necks. And Azzi almost, almost gives into the feeling of belonging as she whispers two simple words that mean just a little too much.
“Welcome home.”
***
Seven pairs of eyes watch as the movers move box after box after box into Paige’s apartment, until there’s more cardboard than floor visible. The three non-UConn girlies are wide-eyed as they watch the pile grow endlessly. Meanwhile Jana is laughing while Azzi tries to hide a smile behind her hands as the realization that she’d have to unpack all of her stuff hits Paige in waves, and her expression grows more and more somber. Once the movers are finally done, it’s Stephie, whose hand is still firmly clasped in Paige’s, who breaks the silence.
“You have a lot of things Miss Buecks,” the little girl crinkles her nose, as she points out the obvious, “do you really need all of this stuff.”
“Of course I do Stephie,” Paige says indignantly and Azzi scoffs, earning her a withering glare from the blond.
“Aight well it was nice to meet you-” Joyce starts, slowly backing away from the mess until Jana blocks her way.
“Oh no you don’t. I told y’all we were all gonna help her move in. Call it team bonding,” the Egyptian says, her voice vaguely threatening.
“Most of the team isn’t even here,” Aaliyah points out cautiously.
“That’s not the point,” Jana rebukes, “alright team listen up. Here’s how this is going to go-”
“Maybe Paige should take charge. It is her apartment,” Tessa says slowly.
“If we put Paige in charge she’ll tell us all to go home and procrastinate doing anything until after the season,” Azzi says, a knowing smirk playing on her lips.
Paige pouts, “hey! I’m not that bad.”
“Oh you absolutely are.”
“Am not.”
“Are too.”
“O-kay,” Jana claps, breaking apart the bickering, “it’s good to see the two of you are apparently younger than Stephie,” she holds up a hands a both Paige and Azzi start to splutter in their defense, “now as I was saying before being rudely interrupted. We’re gonna split this up. Joyce and I are gonna do the living room. Aaliyah and Tessa, y’all are gonna fix the guest room. Which leaves,” Jana smiles, and it’s only because Azzi knows her so well that she can read the menacing sparkle behind it, “Paige and Azzi to tackle the master bedroom.”
They both open their mouths to protest but are quick to get cut off by an excited Stephie, “I’mma help Mama and Miss Buecks!”
“Of course you are, why would you ever help anybody else? Clearly you don’t love us anymore. Not since your precious Miss Buecks got here,” Joyce says dramatically and while Paige smirks and the rest of the girls pretend to act mock offended, Azzi uses the distraction to sidle up to Jana.
“What the fuck are you playing at El-Alfy,” she hisses under hear breath.
Jana shrugs innocently, “the master bedroom is the hardest because Paige has so many fucking clothes so I’m letting y’all old heads do it. Some of us are below 30 ya know.”
“Cut the bullshit,” Azzi snaps.
“I have absolutely no idea what you’re talking about Fudd,” Jana says airily as she starts to unpack a box, leaving Azzi muttering curses under her breath.
“Hey-”
Azzi spins around at the soft voice, only to find herself crashing against a solid body. It’s instinct, the way Paige’s hands immediately reach out to steady her and it’s instinct, the way Azzi’s hands grab at the lapels of the blond’s shirt. Goosebumps trails up her skin as Paige's breath, hot and heavy, fans across her face. They’re too close; way too close and yet the idea of stepping away feels like a sin. Azzi gulps as her thumb accidentally brushes Paige’s collarbone and the other woman shivers under her touch. She thinks she could probably get drunk off the feeling of knowing that she can still affect Paige like that.
“You uh-” Paige swallows, fingers squeezing involuntarily against Azzi’s hip, “you don’t have to listen to Jana. I can- I can figure it out myself.”
“N-no,” Azzi stutters and she wonders if Paige feels a high from the way she still affects Azzi too, “there’s um- you have- uh- you have a lot of stuff. I can-,” she sucks in a deep breath, “I’ll help.”
“You sure?” there’s a vulnerable edge to Paige’s tone and any resolve Azzi could ever have melts immediately.
“I want to help,” she says softly, letting a small smile slip onto her lips.
The smile she gets in return is bright and sparkling, just like Paige herself and Azzi’s heart lurches, pleased to be the one receiving it, pleased to be the one who’d elicited it, “Good, cause I really wanted your help.”
Azzi shakes her head, trying to ignore the warning bells blazing in her head at the fact that they’re still holding each other, “why’d you pretend you didn’t?”
“I just wanted to hear you say it first,” Paige says, biting at her bottom lip. It leaves a light mark and Azzi finds herself wanting to soothe it over with her own tongue.
She thinks it might have been easier if it was just a little harder to fall back into Paige. It shouldn’t be so simple to fall back into late night conversations, so simple to fall back into easy teasing, so simple to fall back into feeling at peace in Paige’s arms. But it is.
“Mama, Miss Buecks,” it’s Stephie who breaks their bubble but instead of jumping away from each other like they should, they step apart only enough to let the little girl into the space between them, so she can lace her hands through both of theirs, “are you ready?”
“Before you go Paige,” Tessa calls out, holding up a clear bag of corner guards and edge protectors, “what are we doing with these?”
Paige shuffles her feet nervously, “you um- you put them on the edge of like tables and stuff.”
“Bro but they’re for people who have children?” Joyce says, giving Paige a weird look, “you have a kid we don’t know about?”
Paige’s eyes flicker to Stephie for a brief second and Azzi freezes, a warm realization tickling up her spine. Butterflies erupt in her stomach, their wings fluttering to the beat of what’s mine could have been ours.
“Of course not. I’m just super clumsy so precautions and all that,” the blond explains, shooting Jana a glare when the taller woman barely masks a giggle, “quit procrastinating by asking all these questions and get to work.”
“Has anyone ever told you the importance of first impressions? Because I’m telling you Bueckers, using your teammates as unpaid labor the first time you meet them is not it,” Aaliyah gives Paige a pointed look.
“This wasn’t even my idea in the first place,” Paige defends.
“True,” Tessa nods with a sickly sweet smile, “but you’re gonna pay for the pizza anyways.”
“I’m not pay-”
“PIZZA,” Stephie squeals, “Miss Buecks you’re gonna get us Pizza?”
“Yeah Miss Buecks,” Azzi smickers, crossing her arms as Paige’s stubborn retort dies on her lips, “you gonna get us pizza?”
Paige glares at her before she’s swinging Stephie up onto her lap again. And she really needs to stop doing things like that because it’s not remotely good for Azzi’s mental health to watch the way Stephie seems to fit perfectly in Paige’s arms, “of course I am Steph, what do you want?”
The two of them are lost in their own world discussing pizza toppings as Paige starts walking over to the master bedroom, until suddenly they're both turning around, looking at Azzi with identical expressions. And the brunette feels her heart tap out this could be my everything against her ribcage.
“You coming Azzi?”
“Mama, are you coming?”
I’d go anywhere with the two of you, Azzi thinks as she nods her head, a light skip in her step as she moves to catch up with the two of them.
“Of course I’m coming.”
***
Less than 10 minutes into trying to unpack, Azzi realizes that she’s the only one trying to unpack anything when she looks up from where she’s been folding t-shirts -trying and failing at not breathing in their familiar scent- to find Stephie decked in a colorful cardigan that goes all the way down to her toes, her feet clad in a pair of PB4’s that must be three times the size of her own shoes. A pair of Louis Vuitton sunglasses hide almost her entire face as she strikes pose after pose and Paige diligently takes pictures of her.
“YES Stephie,” the blond indulges, “work it girl. There you go babe, hold that pose for me. You’re a natural in front of the camera.”
Stephie giggles and Azzi feels her heart constrict. Her favorite sound in the whole world has never sounded more like a signal for danger.
“Ahem ahem,” she coughs, narrowing her eyes at the two people in front of her, “doesn’t look like y’all are unpacking to me.”
“Mama Miss Buecks has so many pretty clothes,” Stephie gushes, completely ignoring what her mother just said.
“They’d look even prettier folded in her closet,” Azzi says pointedly.
Stephie pouts, “you don’t think I look pretty?”
“You look really pretty in my clothes Stephie,” Paige cuts in, tapping the little girl on the nose before she turns her gaze towards Azzi, “just like your Mama used to.”
The silk material shirt slips out of Azzi’s hand as Paige’s words drizzle around her, like the rain after a drought. It takes every little bit of strength she can muster to force herself to ignore Paige’s words and pick up another shirt to fold even if she can’t stop the rouge tint that colors her face. There’s this part of her that’s been dormant for years but every little interaction with Paige threatens to awaken it and Azzi’s scared that if she lets that happen, she’ll never be able to put it to sleep again.
“Just- just focus on unpacking,” Azzi mutters darkly.
She spends the next hour or so, keeping her eyes downcast, her complete focus on the task at hand. Because if she looks up, if she lets herself see the way Stephie and Paige are folding clothes together while giggling about something, if she lets herself see the way Stephie climbs onto Paige’s back so the woman can give her a piggyback to the closet to deposit the folded clothes, she thinks she could fall in love with this moment, capture it behind her eyelids and let it live there forever. But this moment doesn’t belong to Azzi. Because Paige doesn’t belong to Azzi. Not anymore.
Azzi’s taken away from her thoughts when she feels a tiny hand wrapping around her neck from behind, Stephie’s warm body pressing against her back and just like that, all the tension in her muscles seem to dissipate.
“What’s up sweetheart,” she asks, turning her head to press her lips against her daughter’s temple.
“Nothing Mama,” Stephie says sweetly, “just wanted to give you a hug.”
“Sure you’re not just trying to get out of helping Miss Buecks unpack?” Azzi asks slyly, pulling Stephie from behind her, so the little girl’s lying on her lap instead. She can feel Paige’s eyes focused on the two of them and even without looking, she thinks she knows what she’d find in them if she did.
“Of course not Mama,” Stephie grins and then squeals as Azzi begins to tickle her.
“I think you are,” Azzi sings-songs as she continues to poke at her daughter’s stomach, reveling in the way it makes the child laugh.
“N-no Mama stop, stop,” Stephie manages to wrench herself out from Azzi’s grip, darting to hide behind Paige’s legs, “Miss Buecks save me.”
“There’s no saving you now Stephie-bear,” Azzi roars dramatically as she picks herself off the floor, smirking at her daughter as she wriggles her fingers menacingly.
“You know what the best way to stop someone from tickling you is Stephie?” Paige says slowly, sending the little girl a conspiratorial wink.
“Don’t you dare-”
“You tickle them back,” Paige yells and Stephie eyes widen with excitement, “did you know your Mama’s extremely ticklish?”
“Paige no,” Azzi starts moving back, hands held in surrender.
“You started it.”
“Yeah Mama, you started it.”
“Paige. Stephie. Ple-” Azzi cuts herself off with squeal as two sets of hands start mercilessly prodding at her ribcage. She can’t get away, not when Paige has her securely wrapped from the back and Stephie’s pressed against her front, both of them laughing maniacally. They’re a mess of limbs that’s becoming harder and harder to tell apart as the three of them topple onto Paige’s bed. And Azzi thinks maybe she doesn’t want to escape it at all. She thinks she’d like to freeze them in this moment instead. Forever.
“Pizza’s here,” someone yells from the living room and it’s Stephie who stops first, immediately jumping off the bed at the mention of food, leaving Paige and Azzi alone. On Paige’s bed. Barely an inch of distance between them as they try to catch their breath. It’s Azzi who sits up first, smoothening the wrinkles on her shirt. And just as she’s about to stand up fully, she feels a hand circling around her wrist.
“It’s gonna be weird being alone tonight,” Paige confesses softly and Azzi feels her breath hitch.
“Didn’t you live alone in Dallas? At least after the divorce?” she tries to keep the bitterness out of her voice at the last word, a bitterness she knows she has absolutely no right to feel.
Paige shrugs, her shoulders brushing against Azzi’s, “I did but I knew Dallas. I don’t know this place.”
“What exactly are you asking me?” Azzi asks even though she knows.
“I’m not asking you anything. I don’t know if I have that right anymore” Paige says softly, letting go of Azzi’s wrist as she starts to walk towards the living room, turning her head back slightly once she gets to the door, “I’m just telling you I don’t wanna be alone tonight.”
***
Damn Paige Bueckers and her vulnerable eyes and her earnest tone because Azzi would, really, really like to be enjoying her slice of pizza right now. Instead everything tastes like ashes as Paige’s unsaid plea rings in her head. There are so many reasons why Azzi absolutely shouldn’t give in, why she should grab Stephie, get into her car, drive home and never look back. This involuntary dance the two of them are starting is far too familiar to what they’d done when they were teenagers and the vivid memories of the day the music stopped and they’re feet stopped moving still haunt Azzi every time she lets herself think of it for a little too long. And she shouldn’t push herself into this fire again, not when there’s Stephie to think about, but there’s a tiny little problem. She thinks she might be addicted to burning in Paige’s flames.
So when the pizza’s done and the house is more or less in order, and her teammates are ready to leave, looking expectantly at Azzi, she finds herself leaping into lava, “um- I think Stephie and I are gonna stay for a little bit longer.”
“We are?” Stephie asks, a huge smile stretching the length of her face as she looks up at her mother.
“Yeah. Um- Paige’s bedroom still um- still needs some work,” Azzi tries to justify her decision, ignoring the heat of the blond’s eyes that seem to be perpetually stuck staring at her.
Joyce raises a perplexed eyebrow, “it looked done to me.”
Paige clears her throat, “there’s definitely uh- a couple more things that need to be handled.”
“It’s almost Stephie’s bedtime. I could stay and help-” Jana begins, eyeing the two of them suspiciously.
“No,” Paige says, a little louder than necessary, “I mean you’ve already done so much for me today Jana,” she manages a smirk, “let Azzi pull her weight a little bit too ya know.”
Janna narrows her eyes but doesn’t push it. It’s oddly domestic, standing side by side with Paige bidding goodbye to their teammates, Stephie in between them happily waving at the people that are leaving. The warning bells get louder and louder; Azzi continues to do nothing to stop them.
“Mama, how long are we staying?” Stephie asks innocently.
“We um-” Azzi chews at her lip, finally giving into the temptation to look at Paige, “we’re gonna stay with Miss Buecks tonight so she doesn’t feel alone.”
The shrill scream that escapes Stephie’s mouth could probably break glass as she turns herself around to grab at Paige’s waist, “Miss Buecks I’m gonna stay with you! We’re gonna have a sleep-over.”
Paige laughs, kneeling down so she’s face to face with the little girl, “yeah we are.”
“Are you scared to sleep alone too Miss Buecks?” Stephie asks cautiously, cupping Paige’s face with tiny hands.
“Just a little bit,” Paige admits, leaning into Stephie’s touch.
“Me too,” Stephie whispers shyly, “that’s why I sneak into Mama's bed and she gives me lots and lots and lots of cuddles. Mama’s cuddles are the best,” she turns to Azzi, “Mama will you give Miss Buecks cuddles tonight too?”
“I uh-” Azzi swallows, taken aback by the question, “I thought you didn’t like sharing Mama’s cuddles?”
“I don’t,” Stephie agrees, “but I’d be okay sharing them with Miss Buecks.”
***
Azzi had planned -a loose term because really she hadn’t planned on any of this- for her and Stephie to take the guest room. Paige had been ready to give up her own room on the grounds of politeness. And Stephie was insistent that she needed to sleep in between both Mama and Miss Buecks tonight because it’s a sleepover we all have to stay together. Obviously out of the three of them, only one of them was going their way and it didn’t take a genius to figure out who that would be. That’s how they’d ended up here, dragging chairs and pillows and blankets into the middle of the living room to create a makeshift fort.
Azzi’s putting on the finishing touches, stringing purple fairy lights Paige had produced out of nowhere, when Stephie emerges from Paige’s bedroom where she’d gone looking for something to wear in lieu of pajamas.
“Mama look what I found,” Stephie beams, proudly pointing at the black t-shirt she’s found that covers her whole body, “it’s you and Miss Buecks when you were littler.”
It’s their SLAM cover t-shirt and Azzi feels tears prickling at her waterline as she’s met with the picture of a younger version of the two of them. Back when they’d been so hopeful and carefree, ready to take on the world as long as they could do it together. Back when they’d been 2 in a million.
“I can’t believe you still have this,” Azzi whispers, unable to stop herself from running her fingers across the version of who they used to be. She wonders what those girls would think of them now; those girls who’d laid and bed and pinky promised forever. She thinks they’d probably be appalled at the fact that Paige and Azzi had spent eight years barely speaking. She thinks maybe they’d hate her for what she’d done. She thinks maybe she hates herself a little bit for what she’s done to them.
Paige is leaning against the wall, her voice quiet when she speaks, “I couldn’t let it go.”
And they both know she’s not talking about the shirt.
“Can we watch a movie?” Stephie asks, diving into the fort and peering up at the two adults.
Paige recovers first, “yeah- yeah of course Steph,” she looks at Azzi, “do you- do you want something else to sleep in?”
“I’m good,” Azzi says, trying to inconspicuously brush away a rebellious tear. The shirt she’s wearing feels itchy against her skin but she doesn’t think she could handle wearing something of Paige’s. She scooches into the fort, leaning back against one of the pillows and Stephie’s quick to curl into her and Azzi absentmindedly rubs her hands down her daughter’s back. Paige switches on the TV, letting Stephie dictate a movie choice before letting herself into the fort, laying down on Stephie’s other side.
“Miss Buecks come cuddle,” Stephie demands from where her head is laying on Azzi’s chest. When Paige hesitates, the younger girl takes it upon herself to pull Paige’s arms over her, making the older woman lie on her side so she can drape her hands over Stephie's stomach, accidentally brushing against Azzi’s ribcage. Stephie lets out a satisfied sigh, lying back down against Azzi, crossing her arms so she can hold Paige’s hand with one and latch onto her mother with the other.
“Perfect.”
And it is. The sound of Stephie’s chatter slowly fading away mixed with Paige’s quiet breathing is the perfect lullaby and Azzi finds herself drifting off into the best sleep she’s had in years.
***
Sunlight peeks in through the window and Azzi groans at the interruption. Her whole body feels a little stiff, not used to sleeping on the floor like this. A quick glance at her phone tells her it’s 7 a.m. and Azzi’s just about to let herself fall back asleep when her eyes land on the two sleeping figures next to her. Stephie’s face is buried in Paige’s neck, one arm slung over her waist. Paige, mouth slightly ajar as she sleeps, has both hands fastened on the younger, holding her tightly against her chest like she’d fight the world if someone tried to steal her from her grip. They look happy, content, at peace. And Azzi can’t breathe.
The warning bells in her head create a cacophonous commotion that she can no longer escape. It hits her like whiplash that she can’t do this. She doesn’t know what had gotten into her last night, why she’d agreed to this, to any of this. But she can’t do this.
“Stephie,” Azzi whispers urgently, trying to pull her daughter out of Paige’s grasp, “Stephie wake up.”
“Az?” Paige asks groggily, stirring in her sleep, “what’s going on?”
“We need to go home,” Azzi says and she can’t bear to look at Paige.
“What?” Paige is far more awake now as she glances at her phone, “it’s 7 am Azzi. What’s the rush?"
Azzi ignores her, still trying to wake Stephie up who groans, “Mama too early.”
“Steph-”
“Azzi,” Paige’s voice is firm as she wraps her hand around Azzi’s wrist, slipping Stephie off of her, “what is going on.”
Azzi grits her teeth, “nothing’s going on. We just need to go home.”
“Azzi-”
“We shouldn’t have stayed last night Paige,” Azzi bursts out and Paige freezes.
“Come out of the fort Azzi,” the blond says, her voice eerily calm as she stands up. Azzi follows after her, heart beating rapidly against her chest as she tries to keep the tears at bay.
“We need to go home,” the brunette repeats, struggling to breathe, “this was a mistake,” Paige flinches and Azzi feels a knife turn in her own hurt, “we can’t do this.”
“Do what Azzi?” Paige asks exasperatedly, still trying to keep her voice low for Stephie’s sake.
“This,” Azzi all but shrieks, throwing her hands up, “it’s too much, too quick and Stephie- Stephie’s getting attached and I can’t- I can’t let that happen.”
“Why not?” Paige argues stubbornly.
“Because these last two weeks she couldn’t fall asleep without you on the phone. Because you’re all she talks about sometimes. Because she’s gonna want you forever,” Azzi’s voice breaks, “and she can’t have you forever.”
“Az-”
“And you’re getting attached too. I see the way you look at her and it’s amazing but it’s not- it’s not sustainable Paige. For either of you. Because you’re gonna find someone soon,” the words taste sour on Azzi’s tongue, “and you’re not gonna have time for her and missing you is going to kill her and the guilt of that is going to hurt you. I’m trying to pro-”
“Don’t you fucking dare,” Paige’s voice is hard now, eyes gleaming with fire, “you’re basing all of this on a hypothetical that might not even come true. You’re not protecting anybody. You’re projecting.”
Azzi reels back, “I am not projecting.”
“Yes you are,” Paige hisses, “you’re not scared of Stephie or me getting too attached. You’re scared of yourself getting too attached.”
“Mama? Miss Buecks,” Stephie’s tired eyes look warily between the two of them, “what’s going on?”
Azzi plasters a smile on her face as she picks up her little girl, trying to pretend that the truth in Paige’s words haven’t just made her feel hollow, “we’re going home Stephie.”
“I don’t wanna go home,” Stephie fights against Azzi’s grip, looking helplessly at Paige, “Miss Buecks I wanna stay. Can I please stay?”
“You have to listen to your Mama sweetheart��� Paige says softly, heartbreak written over her face as she moves to press a kiss against Stephie’s knuckles, “but I’ll see you soon okay. I promise.”
“Miss Buecks,” Stephie whimpers and Azzi has never hated herself more as she rushes out of Paige’s new house, willing herself to not look back. She buckles Stephie in the back, pretending she doesn’t see the way Paige is watching them leave from the porch, like she’d do anything to stop it. And then she drives away.
It isn’t until she’s safely in the confines over her own room, that Azzi finally lets the tears fall. And she consoles herself with the fact that it’s okay to crack her daughter's heart, to crack Paige’s heart, to crack her own heart, if that’s the only way she can stop their hearts from breaking altogether.
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GUESS WHO'S BACK??? Happy new year you bone-loving weirdos (affectionately)!!! Let's start 2025 with Nona!!!
previously, in this react series:
we (I mean me, but also you, alongside me) finished harrowcita del 9
we read some short stories
I made a gideon craft as a gift and the person I made it for told me that the recap I wrote in the back made it to some discord server somewhere
my legacy is being unfunny
NOW LET'S START WITH NONA:
(that's how I called 2 of my great-grandmothers)
I decided to skip all the praise for the book because some of them were getting a little too involved with the story and I don't want to know anything, thank you very much
I did however read the blurb in the inside cover that I missed the last time
I wonder if at some point I could make like an audio version of a recap as I read, because my reaction when I read the following was Something, but then again you'd have to deal with my pronunciation of the names and idk if I want that
anyway, blurb says "with Pyrrha, Camilla and Palamedes"
???????????????????????????????????????????
I thought it was judith and coronabeer twin??????
I'm gonna change her name from regina george twin to coronabeer twin now because she outlived her other nickname
she's the only nickname graduate so far
who took palmolive out of the tamagotchi river loft???????
who set him loose????
how is phyrrha there, she was with gideon/harrow/gideonharrow fusion??????
"each night, Nona dreams of a woman with a skull painted face"
don't we all
the list of books says "Nona the Ninth" and so does the title in the paratext
instead of dramatis personae we have a guest list for a party
there are a lot of dogs invited to the party, which is nice
one of them has six legs
there's also people with BOE names
and one kevin, love to see it, I'll remember him
lots of meme potential there
there are some camilla annotations beside all the people from BOE allegedly nona wants to invite
still not seeing coronabeer and/or judith
gonna imagine that, wherever they are, they're making out
good for them
we got two poems after, the latter of which is a bit heart wrenching, I don't wanna ask about it
then we got a title that looks like a bible verse
had to google it and it is a verse about peter and a disciple finding jesus's tomb empty
ice cube barbie is locked tomb jesus confirmed
I've never mentioned this before but this has happened to me ever since book 1, and since it's here again I'm gonna say it
I have noticed I have a bad knee jerk reaction to the adjective 'fat' being used so often for so many things, but I'm trying to work thought it
don't wanna project my trauma onto unintended narrators
we got a summarized recount of events of what might be how emperor asshat and some of his lyctors got where they got from maybe present times???
there's talk about cryogenics for a lot of people and an evacuation plan from earth
and names are erased but we have some initials that could be augustine, mercygirl, cassiopeia and gideon
I don't think c is not!dulcinea because she was meant to be a newer model lyctor
during this recount he's in the beach alongside harrow, who he says he's gonna hurt
harrow apparently says she still loves him
gideon would be kicking him in the nuts
also, I thought the emperor was with yandere twin
what the hell happened between the two books???? where's everyone????
DAY ONE (hot sauce and 5 days until the tomb opens) CH 1
we've got a recorded statement of what feels to me like the Pool Situation Wink Wonk You Know The One
is she harrow??? or is harrow in the river with the emperor and this is a new person???? who is this????? is harrow's soul in the river???? where is gideon's perfectly preserved body that we knew camilla was carrying around with coronabeer and judith???
I don't know anything
but my wife is here, so it's all good
also, she's apparently sharing a body with palmolive now
so now the wife ideal turned into a polycule situation, I guess
didn't have that in my 2025 cards
I have two hands, apparently, idk
turns out, palmolive was somehow freed from his tamagotchi loft in the river and placed in camilla's body so they share it
how? by who? when?
glad you asked, I don't know
they're sharing space now, that's all I know
it's kind of like the lyctors should have been if the emperor wasn't an asshole, I guess
because it seems they can also switch easily and like coexist without totally cutting the other one out
it feels a lot healthier and organic in their relationship, even though palmolive is a soul guest
palmolive says camilla's body is a temple, so I'm glad we agree
pyrrha is also there, I assume taking over og!gideon's body fully, since he died, afaik
they're taking care of nona, who doesn't know who she is and they don't seem to know either, but if she has harrow's memories, I don't know what to tell you
they're living in a complicated militarized situation with few resources and little light use
palmolive thinks he could write explicit materials for a living but camilla doesn't want them to be remembered for that
palmolive wrote a lot of Things to his bae in correspondence, so maybe that's already part of his legacy
nona is sent to her room while palmolive and pyrrha argue about BOE acting weird
camolive want to rescue people, pyrrha thinks it's a bad idea and wants to get nona away from the planet
pyrrha also mentions a "she" that's crazier than camilla and makes references to commander wake me up when september ends but that one died???? twice????? so idk who this new "she" is
let's remember, for the record, that both og!gideon and pyrrha were Intimate with commander wake me up before we go go
apparently there are more people who are planet refugees in this one planet than two houses combined
which doesn't surprise me in the least, because that's how oppression often works, but is good to have it confirmed
heralds are also still a problem and camilla wants to fight them
pyrrha thinks that's a bad idea, because there's data of that not being possible
but she doesn't know that camilla hect is perfect and can do everything right always
it is important for me to clarify that, more than anyone ever in this book series, nona is the true definition of what in my land we refer to as: "está en un cumple"
the literal definition of the phrase means "she's in a birthday party"
the idiom definition is that someone is totally unaware of what is going on, without understanding what's around them, often used for people in a content state while unaware of a problem everyone else is worrying about
I truly think it's a very good way to describe her and I can't translate it in a way that feels the exact way, especially due to the party context
I headcanon her wearing this shirt
she also wants to save the animals, while camolive want to save the people
pyrrha is just tired and wants to retire to a farming planet to live in peace
I get it, though, imagine having to serve emperor asshat for so long
poor cavalier deserves some rest, og!gideon had the right idea when he exited the entire situation
saw an out with that fight in the river and left the chat
pyrrha is also worried about BOE capturing and torturing camolive for interrogation
and there seems to be an underlying plan between camolive and pyrrha that I'm not entirely sure of yet
nona, apparently, goes to school, because she's in a cumple, as previously established
going to school on top of the eye in the sky and the military issues and the social strife and the potential torturing doesn't sound ideal but very glad there's still an education system in place among all that
AND THAT'S IT FOR NOW!!! It's proving a bit complicated to do recaps with a paperback but I'm gonna try to find my footing!! See you on the next one!!
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2024 kdrama post
We are already in December and nothing new I am likely to be interested in is gonna drop before the end of the year - and if it does it will run into 2025 so I can address it in my 2025 kdrama post, unless we are all ruled by lizard aliens by then.
Normally I list all the dramas made this year that I watch, thoughts on them, blah blah but this year I disliked most of the kdramas I tried (it was the worst kdrama year for me since 2006 when I first started!) and I don't want to make a giant negative post, so I am going to only mostly talk about the kdramas I enjoyed in some capacity.
From least to most:
Love Your Enemy - I don't really like it tbh, but it's here for nostalgia over JJH.
Tell Me You Love Me - good and quiet but suffers in comparison to the original and that FL actress is just not my cup of tea.
Connection - Ji Sung gives a powerhouse performance in a very solid crime drama; it's not higher because it's just not my genre.
The Midnight Shop - it was nice seeing Joo Won in not a disaster of a drama. It wasn't as engrossing as it could have been but I did like both the mains and rooted for them.
Knight Flower - was I emotionally involved? Nah. Was I entertained? Yeah.
The Judge From Hell - "was I emotionally involved? Nah. Was I entertained? Yeah." Redux.
Queen of Tears - honestly, it should probably be in the below category but I enjoyed myself for the first half so much, I am willing to pretend the nonsense disaster plots and character interactions of second half were not as bad as they were.
My Demon - sucker for supernatural romance fantasy done right (to me it was, I know some people didn't like it.)
Goryeo Khitan War - I put it on my 2023 list too so it's double dipping but whatever. This is just a grand old school sageuk and I adored every moment.
Lovely Runner - normally youth dramas bore me but this one was so sweet, so lovely, so pitch perfect.
Black Out - did not really feel like a kdrama at all, more like a prestige BBC production, but I loved it anyway, as bleak and harrowing as it was.
When the Phone Rings - my current obsession, old school melo the way they haven't made in years.
The sad thing is, a number of these dramas started airing in 2023 and/or beginning of the year. Most of this year has been the Sahara.
Dramas which I enjoyed off the start and then fell off the cliff into what the hell land: Captivating the King (wonderful first 4-5 episodes, OK few following, stupid as hell the rest - solid acting brought down by a ridiculous script), The Story of Park's Marriage Contract (great first two eps and then downhill rapidly with each following episode), Love Song For Illusion (first ep not bad, second ep tolerable, after that with each ep, my ff fingers got twitchier and twitchier.)
OTP of the year: Duh, Baek Sa Eon x Hong Hui Joo, When the Phone Rings, have you seen this tumblr lately?
Trend I wish would die: 8 ep kdramas, 12 ep kdramas. Bring back freaking 16 ep as a minimum standard. Also pls get Disney and Netlfix out of kdrama world while we are on impossible wishes.
Genre I need less of: romcoms; Genre I need more of: proper sageuk.
Worst waste of my eyeballs: The Impossible Heir.
Most boobs per minute: Queen Woo.
Best non-2024 kdrama I watched this year: Beyond Evil. A total masterpiece.
And that's a wrap!
(My cdrama post is gonna be insane in comparison to this.)
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yo…hear me out..
what the main four or others (as long as kyles in it..) are like for new years celebrations!
happy 2025 yall. let’s cook.
oh look its kyle bufflobster on that gif. my personal enemy.
Happy 2025!!! Hope everyone's having a great time already! As for me, I managed to drink cider that's been expired since 2021. It's going swell.
My first request for headcanons! I don't even know if I did these right, but I really did rack my brain. I also added some words about how they'd be with the reader because why not.
MAIN FOUR HEADCANONS - NEW YEAR'S CELEBRATIONS
𓆩♡𓆪 STAN MARSH
First thing that needs to be said: this man is pissed off days in advance over fireworks - if he has any pets, he has to make absolutely sure they’re safe and secure before anything else. He’s that guy who’s very vocal about how bad they are for animals (doesn’t really mention their effects on people), has probably tried to get them banned completely at some point.
Now that that’s out of the way. I think he’s the type to stay holed up in his home, order takeout and treat it as just another evening.
With the exception that he’ll have an excuse to drink a whole lot of cheap champagne without anyone being up his ass about it.
Avoids his family altogether, mostly due to his father wanting to go absolutely wild on the holiday, he needs to be far away from all that.
He’s not opposed to attending a party and being around his friends, but will not actively seek that out.
And if he’s partying, he’s gonna go blackout drunk and probably miss the actual turn of the year - only to try and drunkenly state his well wishes (or personal grievances) to everyone half an hour later when the whole thing has pretty much died down.
Thumbs up reacts to everyone’s texts on the afternoon of Jan 1st; no real response.
No resolutions at all. There’s no point - at the end of the day, the new year is just a continuation of everything that has been going on in his life. If he has to achieve anything, he’ll do so of his own accord, making a promise is just putting unnecessary weight on his own shoulders.
If he’s with you, however… He can be a little better and put more effort into it, because he sees how excited you are and doesn’t wanna burst your bubble.
Will do whatever you wanna do, but has a high preference for it just being the two of you somewhere isolated, with some food and music and the aforementioned champagne (which he drinks a lot less of if you’re present)
Will pull you into a kiss right as the fireworks start and try to keep you distracted for the duration, both because he wants to be as close to you as possible in that moment and also so that he can ignore the things entirely.
Will tell you all about how he loves you and how you’re the best thing that’s happened to him. Even if he sounds drunk, you know he means all of it entirely.
𓆩♡𓆪 KYLE BROFLOVSKI
He’s probably nothing special on NYE. Probably also stays at home, but not isolated.
Jewish New Year isn’t on Dec 31st, but I still think his parents do a little something, like some nice dinner or a reunion with extended family members or friends.
If he finds himself at some party, he’s pretty well-behaved even there. I don’t see him raising hell - however, if anyone stresses him out, he’ll fight like it’s any other old day.
Is the one fucker who brought the expensive champagne that no one can recognize the name of - which got the same treatment as the other cheap ones from the supermarket.
I do unfortunately see him in the position of designated driver. Someone has to make sure his dumbass friends don’t kill themselves on the road. That doesn’t mean he’s ever happy about it, though.
Watches people partake in superstitions, but doesn’t do any of them himself.
Sends ‘Happy New Year’ texts to almost everyone he knows as soon as midnight rolls over.
Makes resolutions and sticks to them - writes them, pins them to the wall, the whole nine yards. Morning of Jan 1st he’s already making detailed plans about how he’s going to achieve everything he said he would that year (whether those plans actually succeed is a whole different animal)
If he’s with you… He absolutely tries to make it a special night, despite it meaning little to him in a superstitious sense.
He’s also in the position where your plans are his plans, he’ll follow you. However, if you do accept to spend NYE with his family and him the whole time, it sends his heart soaring because he knows that you’re choosing him above all the other stuff you could be doing, and he’ll make sure you have a great time even if his family is… difficult.
Brings you into a soft and tender kiss as the new year rolls over, holding you close as you both share a toast of champagne and sort of ignore the first fireworks in favor of being with each other.
At the top of his resolution list is the mission to make your year the best it can possibly be, and to love you through all of it. He hasn’t really written that down on his list, though - because it’s on his mind 24/7 anyway.
𓆩♡𓆪 ERIC CARTMAN
Leaves his mother alone - he’s at a party somewhere, for sure. Even if he was invited to none, he’ll sneak his way in. Since no one really has it in them to argue with him on NYE, he gets to stay.
Which shouldn’t even be a bad thing, because he actually brings the heat; he shows up with several beverages and food every time. The part of it that sucks is the fact that everything he brings is for his consumption, so he’s still an expense to the host.
He can, however, legitimately be trusted with the aux. Actual decent taste when it comes to party music.
That one guy making jokes about how he ‘hasn’t showered since last year’ or shit. Except he says them at 10pm still on Dec 31st and no one’s sure if he’s just stupid or if it’s really true.
Wears party accessories ironically; possibly brought them.
Buys whole boxes of fireworks. He’ll try to find some poor soul to do the work of lighting them up for him, but normally can’t, so he does it himself and probably needs to be taken to the hospital from the burns or sets fire to something else entirely.
Makes posts and stories on social media wishing a half-assed Happy New Year to ‘everyone’ - when in reality he got maybe like, two texts at most. (Butters and his mom, most likely)
Strangely superstitious? People will see him go through all the possible traditions that anyone said would bring him good fortune. If anyone asks him about it, he’ll deny deny deny - actually, he’s wearing full white ‘because it’s drip’ and eating those grapes under the table ‘because he doesn’t want to share them’, it’s definitely not that he fears for his own luck if he doesn’t do so.
Since he is a little ‘stitious, that does mean he makes resolutions. And they’re usually grandiose, full of bullshit, and don’t really signify any relevant positive change for his life - it’s mostly just material and physical gratification. Needless to say, they’ve never come to fruition.
If he’s with you, barely anything changes, really.
Talks to you about his plans for the evening as if they’re a done deal. Basically drags you to whatever it is he wants to do. (You might even be the reason he’s able to get into a party to begin with)
Doesn’t kiss you straight away because he’s busy with his fireworks, but if he manages to not hurt himself, you get a heavy makeout session afterwards.
He talks mad shit about how you’re lucky to have him and how you should thank him for spending this time with you, but in reality, there’s nowhere else he’d rather be.
Immensely grateful for your presence in his life and willing to do anything to keep it that way. However, you won’t hear a single word about it.
𓆩♡𓆪 KENNY MCCORMICK
Out of his house by sundown - the addicts around him don’t really need a special occasion for doing their shit and stirring trouble, but it still seems to worsen on the holidays, so he wants to avoid that.
The protection Stan feels towards animals, he feels towards his siblings. Before he goes do anything else, he has to make sure they’re accounted for, with their friends somewhere safe where they can enjoy the night.
When that’s dealt with, it’s party time. He does get invited to stuff, and tries his best to not show up empty-handed, even if it’s just a bottle of cheap alcohol. He might still fail in that regard, though, but it’s okay, we still love him.
Wears all the ridiculous party accessories unironically.
Has died, more than once, due to firework-related accidents. Still enjoys watching them, albeit from a very safe distance now.
Watches the ball drop livestream on the television with great interest, even if just because it’s in HD this time. Celebrates heavily when it finally happens.
His ‘Happy New Year’ texts come in the afternoon, because he’s always too wasted in the morning to tell anyone anything. People might receive a drunken nonsensical jumble of letters at midnight, though.
Says surface-level words about a resolution or two, but it’s mostly really simple stuff. Also doesn’t really hold any of that to heart, because he knows of his own bad luck.
Doing the absolute most for a new year’s kiss (or several), practically on his knees begging for it.
However, if he’s with you… You’re getting way more than a kiss. It doesn’t even matter where y’all are, he’s starting the year by doing his favorite thing with his favorite person.
He kinda drags you into his plans, but it’s not in a selfish way like Cartman does. He just wants to make sure the both of you have a great time.
If you turn out to invite him personally to spend time with your family or just yourself, words cannot describe how happy he’s gonna be. It’ll basically make his whole year. He’ll ditch any party for that.
Partying all night with his baby, watching the fireworks, making love and not having to worry about anything else? Count this dude in.
Dividers by @cafekitsune
#south park#south park fanfiction#south park headcanons#south park x reader#south park x y/n#south park x you#south park stan#sp stan#stan marsh#south park kyle#sp kyle#kyle broflovski#south park cartman#sp cartman#eric cartman#south park kenny#sp kenny#kenny mccormick#headcanon#imagine#sp headcanons#nye#new year's eve
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20 BLs Announced for 2025 That I'm Really Excited About
Boys in Love
Thai trailer
Our only true high school BL from GMMTV and it's fresh faces for the youths and old favs for the teachers. It's milk teeth Make it Right and that is perfectly fine with me! I like lotte milk. Also DIMPLES! Yay! I suspect they're using this one to test some new pairs for future seasons. Like a Project 101 Thai BL. (Honestly I just invented an amazing reality TV for you GMMTV, you're welcome.
Fight for You
Taiwan
Da Hei reluctantly takes on dangerous odd jobs to earn medical funds, unaware that his roommate Xiao Bai is secretly an operative sent by the intelligence agency to take them down.
Dare You to Death
Thai trailer
JoongDunk as police investigators in a mystery suspense thriller. Yes, I'm in. This is it. This it the one I wanted to instantly watch. Even though their's 20 BLs airing right now.
Interminable
Thai YouTube
BillyBabe are back in a reincarnation historical.
Love of Silom
Thai WeTV
UpPoom are back in another complex piece. Closeted brokenhearted policeman meets struggling single dad.
Mandate
Thai
A fierce political battle is the starting point of love between two men of different statuses and backgrounds, not to mention a 17 year age gap.
Me and Thee
Thai trailer
A photographer gets involved with the mafia? OMG is this a Thai dupe for Target the Finder? Only mixed with Cyrano? WILD. I mean to say, this one is wild WILD! Plus Est (my love) back in suits and ear dongles I see. Also GMMTV never gonna let us forget they bagged two of BL's best bods with PP, thanks all for the visuals. Of course this is for me. I'm the shallowest, remember? Plus I love a BL that's just a little bit...... well...... stupid.
Me and Who
Thai WeTV trailer
Lead pair from Monster Next Door, BigPark, in an adaptation of Wickedwish’s novel of the same name. A poor young man dies and is reborn into the body of a billionaire heir. The heir happens to be engaged to a handsome man who come to understand his secret.
Memoir of Rati
Thai trailer
Sing the praise song with me BLabies! GreatInn in a HISTORICAL with a class divide and everyone's favourite side couple! Be still my heart! I'm beyond pleased. (Also I got my boat in a lotus pond at last.) My only concern is this could end sad, it's in the title after all.
My Magic Prophecy
Thai trailer
Paranormal mystery with a fortune teller and a doctor. I'm in. I hope the script doesn't fail JimmySea again, they are such a great pair. I'm intrigued by this one but it felt the most formless of all the trailers, so I'm thinking we could see some significant tweaks.
My Romance Scammer
Thai trailer
New couple! My boys Ohm and Fluke (no, not that Fluke, the one from My Ride). Honestly, Fluke has popped up as a side in a couple GMMTV shows I was wondering who they'd BL him with.
This could win. Prettiest human on earth paired with the world's most potent single dimple. Will I survive? I honestly don't know, because Ohm historically doesn't have much chemistry with anyone but the original Fluke so... Still I l do love JuniorMark and this as a really unique premise (gay Heartbreakers), so I'm game.
Secret Relationship
Korea
This 2022 offering is now officially moved to 2025. To be adapted by Cradle Studio (a subsidiary of Kakao). About clever and resourceful Daon who has worked hard to overcome being poor. His cheap ways annoy his coworker, Sunghyeon but after “an incident” with his parents, Daon grows closer to him. But Daon also has feelings for his former tutor. This has the signs of a classic Kdrama all over it: Office setting, love triangle, lead suffering for his self-actualization. I’m optimistic about a longer treatment.
Secret Relationship
Taiwan
Rivals to lovers with unhinged behavior that in the source material ranges from rock-paper-scissors contests to competitive handjobs (yeah, you read that right). If anyone can do this, it's Taiwan.
The Hell Guard
Thai
Boy wakes up from a coma and becomes a messenger between grim reapers and the underworld. I adore this premise.
The Next Prince
Thai trailer
ZeeNew in a fantasy/historical set in a palace where Zee plays a knight and Nu a prince - YES PLEASE.
The Wicked Game
Thai
DaouOffroad doing some Jack & Joker action. Trust is a luxury. Deception is a game.
The Young Gangster
Taiwan WeTV
Adapted from a novel, may not be a BL. Sociologist begins doing research in the underworld, falls in love with a gangster.
Top Form
Thai WeTV
Adaptation of a Japanese manga. Boom (Chains of Heart) opposite Smart (Don't Say No). Actor recognized as the "The Sexiest Man of the Year" has his first-place position usurped by young newcomer. But while he sees them as rivals, turns out the new kid has other ideas.
Truemoon
Thai YouTube trailer
A take on my single favorite trope: love rivals to lovers.
Your Dear Daddy
Thai trailer
Haunted by his past, Saithan is unwilling now to tie himself to anyone. On holiday in Chiang Mai, he happens to meet Sila, the wealthy owner of Phu Saengdao farm and hotel. The two find themselves strangely drawn to one another and ultimately spend a night together, thinking they wouldn't see each other again.
(source)
Historically I am pretty poor at picking the ones I end of loving, but it's fun to try.
#2025 BL#upcoming BL#new bl#thai bl#forthcoming bl#Dare You to Death#Boys in Love#Memoir of Rati#My Magic Prophecy#Me and Thee#Your Dear Daddy#Truemoon#Top Form#The Young Gangster#The Wicked Game#The Next Prince#The Hell Guard#Secret Relationship#My Romance Scammer#Me and Who#Mandate#Love of Silom#Interminable#Fight for You
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2024 Fic Writer End of Year Roundup
Answer and then tag three or more creators to keep the game going! Thank you to everyone who tagged me and have had me in their inspo sections, I adore each and every one of you!
1. How many words did you publish on AO3 in 2024?
518,691 (hoping to add another 3-4k to this before midnight hehe)
I CANNOT drop that number without thanking the fucking dream team who has read EVERY SINGLE PUBLISHED WORD of mine: @popjunkie42 and @climbthemountain2020. From cheerleading, to pumping the breaks when my run ons be running, I appreciate the ever-loving hell out of both of you. Thank you, thank you, thank you!
Honorable mention betas who hold up that number: @cauldronblssd, @wilde-knight, @thesistersarcheron, and @rosanna-writer. I truly appreciate every one of you babes and your critical, brilliant eyes on my self indulgent streams of thought.
2. How many fics did you complete this year?
21! 13 of those were one shots.
If I can be real, I have two multi-chapter WIPs sitting in my docs, but it felt too irresponsible to post those once I started getting buried in grad school.
3. How many in progress or ongoing fics did you start this year?
Heading into the new year, I have 2 in progress fics: Ruin Me for the Fourth Wing fandom and Who's Gonna Know You Like Me? for ACOTAR.
4. What was your favorite thing you wrote?
Any of my poly fics! I really have to thank @acourtofladydeath for her beautiful brain child @polyacotarweek for getting me into the poly mind set. Although I only wrote throuples for that week (and since aside from the background Nesta/Eris/Azriel/Cassian in Who's Gonna Know You Like Me?), I am interested in writing more complex poly pairings in 2025.
I also can't leave out @yanny-77, @copperfirebird and @hockeyspiral23 for supporting the violaiden obsession! I adore writing the three of them together so so much and it's so fun to have others to share the brain rot with!
5. What piece was your most experimental or different from your usual style?
I had never done a true canon rewrite before dripping in gold! It was so so fun taking an in text scene and making it queer as hell.
6. Did any fics surprise you - either while writing or their reception?
It's undeniable that A Court of Chaos and Darkness's reception took me by surprise. From the moment I couldn't shake the concept of the fic to the over one hundred kudos it received before I took it off of anon. But even more so, the absolute comfort blanket this fic was as I wrote it was shocking. Something in the healing occurring, in the recognition of the complexity of parenting and the messiness of the parent/child relationship really struck me.
The fic @revenge??? I love you filthy azris lovers. This was an outlet for some of my dating app blunders and shenanigans and you all really said "serve."
And then there's my first omegaverse fic and the first of it's kind in the Fourth Wing ao3 tag (when it was posted, I believe there's several more now!): so what now? The Fourth Wing fandom has been warm as hell and so inviting to me, but you have all really embraced me bringing weird into the tags and I just can't thank you enough as I gape at the stats.
7. Do you have a fic you wrote and loved that went under the radar? (This is your sign to reblog/repost it!)
Either of my sapphic fics: dripping in gold (genderbent feysand) and lunch. (morlain ft the mommy kink tag!)
8. Who is an artist that inspired you?
There are so, so many talented artists that inspire me! @thrumugnyr, @copypastus , @queercontrarian and @lucychanart have been my muses for all things Tamlin. @climbthemountain2020 and @wilde-knight are triple threats and their art brings me such joy! There's also @dustjacketdraws that always has primo Cassian and Nesta vibes!
9. Who is an author that inspired you?
There are SO many. First and foremost, my babe @popjunkie42. I love you, my muse. Something about reading your writing and just chatting with you inspires all of my ideas to flow. @asnowfern is another muse and writer I can always turn to for inspiration, we were just recalling her Turning Darkness Into Light elucien spooktober fic that tickles my imagination so much among her other works!
I'm inspired and impressed endlessly by @climbthemountain2020 ability to flawlessly produce well developed, gorgeously vivid stories.
@highlordofkrypton, @missfckingfortune and @beesays inspire me constantly with their raw talent and skill and for the first two, the hot and steamy smut they can turn out. @jules-writes-stories inspires me with her OC work and beautifully layered plots (Mithras, my toxic love.) @c-e-d-dreamer inspires me with her fun AU worlds, but also with her fearlessness to tackle toxic relationships - @secret-third-thing is in this same boat as well as @iftheshoef1tz, @foundress0fnothing, and of course the OGs @thesistersarcheron, @whisperingmidnights, @separatist-apologist and @the-lonelybarricade.
There are so many more of you. I love this community and the inspiration that flows all around your creative, galaxy brained minds.
10. Who is a new author you discovered?
SO many, but those I haven't mentioned yet who are so so talented (but not limited to this list): @dusk-muse, @chairofchaos, @shadowsandlint, @xxvalkyriesxx, @fourteentrout, and @littedidyouknow.
11. Did you do any collaborations? How did it start?
None this year, but the idea is fun!
12. What accomplishments are you proudest of?
Could You Love Me While I Hate Myself is my proudest accomplishment this year by far. I always told myself I couldn't: write OCs, write a longfic, or write a fic that would ever break the UNBELIEVABLE stats this fic has done. I proved myself wrong on every front.
Thank you so much to @asnowfern, @popjunkie42 and @wilde-knight for seeing me through this capstone fic and for believing in me and helping me see myself in a totally different light.
13. What did you learn about writing or creating this year?
Be as silly and self-indulgent as possible.
If you have a killer idea/dialogue line/etc - WRITE IT DOWN. YOU WILL NOT REMEMBER IT LATER.
14. What is your advice?
Surround yourself with people who make you feel like you can accomplish anything and you will never fail because there they will be, gassing you up flop or not.
I love you, harem. Writing is so fun BECAUSE of you. <3
15. What are your creative goals for 2025?
Continuing to eat, serve and let the haters drown in it.
#2024 Fic Writer End of Year Roundup#tag game#I LOVE YOU ALL#sorry this is so long omg#apparently i had a lot to say about this year#my writing
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