#2020!Red was just build different… where did she get all that creativity???

[redkehlchen]

When I put together some plot ideas for the tf2/portal crossover in like 2020, I jokingly suggested: what if Caroline was the Administrator’s assistant before Miss Pauling.

But you know what looking back, that was truly a big brain idea. So have some more old art:

I also went through my old tf2/portal google doc …

And I was just minding my own business, chuckling at that dumb joke in the first paragraph, only to be hit by whatever was going on at the end there?????

[path-of-my-childhood]

Aaron Dessner on How His Collaborative Chemistry With Taylor Swift Led to “Evermore”

By: Claire Shaffer for Rolling Stone Date: December 18th 2020

Taylor Swift and Aaron Dessner didn��t expect to make another record so soon after Folklore. As they were putting the final touches on Swift’s album this past summer, the two artists had been collaborating remotely on possible songs for Big Red Machine, Dessner’s music project with Justin Vernon of Bon Iver (who also dueted with Swift on the Folklore track “Exile”). Dessner recalls:

“I think I’d written around 30 of those instrumentals in total. So when I started sharing them with Taylor over the months that we were working on Folklore, she got really into it, and she wrote two songs to some of that music.”

One was “Closure,” an experimental electronic track in 5/4 time signature that was built over a staccato drum kit. The other song was “Dorothea,” a rollicking, Americana piano tune. The more Dessner listened to them, the more he realized that they were continuations of Folklore‘s characters and stories. But the real turning point came soon after Folklore‘s surprise release in late July, when Dessner wrote a musical sketch and named it “Westerly,” after the town in Rhode Island where Swift owns the house previously occupied by Rebekah Harkness.

“I didn’t really think she would write something to it — sometimes I’ll name songs after my friends’ hometowns or their babies, just because I write a lot of music and you have to call it something, and then I’ll send it to them. But, anyway, I sent it to her, and not long after she wrote ‘Willow’ to that song and sent it back.”

It was a moment not unlike when Swift first sent him the song “Cardigan” back in the spring, where both she and Dessner felt an instant creative spark — and then just kept writing. Before long, they were creating even more songs with Vernon, Jack Antonoff, Dessner’s brother Bryce, and “William Bowery” (the pseudonym of Swift’s boyfriend Joe Alwyn) for what would eventually lead to Folklore‘s wintry sister record, Evermore.

Even more spontaneous than the album that preceded it, Evermore features more eclectic production alongside Swift’s continued project of character-driven songwriting, and includes an even wider group of collaborators, like Haim and Dessner’s own band the National. Dessner spoke to Rolling Stone about the album’s experimentation, how it was recorded during the making of the doc The Long Pond Studio Sessions, and how he sees his collaboration with Swift continuing in the future.

When did you realize this was going to end up being another album?

It was after we’d written several songs, seven or eight or nine. Each one would happen, and we would both be in this sort of disbelief of this weird alchemy that we had unleashed. The ideas were coming fast and furiously and were just as compelling as anything on Folklore, and it felt like the most natural thing in the world. At some point, Taylor wrote “Evermore” with William Bowery, and then we sent it to Justin, who wrote the bridge, and all of a sudden, that’s when it started to become clear that there was a sister record. Historically, there are examples of this, of records which came in close succession that I love — certain Dylan records, Kid A and Amnesiac. I secretly fell in love with the idea that this was part of the same current, and that these were two manifestations that were interrelated. And with Taylor, I think it just became clear to her what was happening. It really picked up steam, and at some point, there were 17 songs — because there are two bonus tracks, which I love just as much.

Evermore definitely sounds more experimental than Folklore, and has more variety — you have these electronic songs that sound like Bon Iver or Big Red Machine, but you also have the closest thing Taylor has written to country songs in the last decade. Was there a conscious effort on her part to branch out more with this album?

Sonically, the ideas were coming from me more. But I remember when I wrote the piano track to “Tolerate It,” right before I sent it to her, I thought, This song is intense. It’s in 10/8, which is an odd time signature. And I did think for a second, “Maybe I shouldn’t send it to her, she won’t be into it.” But I sent it to her, and it conjured a scene in her mind, and she wrote this crushingly beautiful song to it and sent it back. I think I cried when I first heard it. But it just felt like the most natural thing, you know? There weren’t limitations to the process. And in these places where we were pushing into more experimental sounds or odd time signatures, that just felt like part of the work.

It was really impressive to me that she could tell these stories as easily in something like “Closure” as she could in a country song like “Cowboy Like Me.” Obviously, “Cowboy Like Me” is much more familiar, musically. But to me, she’s just as sharp and just as masterful in her craft in either of those situations. And also, just in terms of what we were interested in, there is a wintry nostalgia to a lot of the music that was intentional on my part. I was leaning into the idea that this was fall and winter, and she’s talked about that as well, that Folklore feels like spring and summer to her and Evermore is fall and winter. So that’s why you hear sleigh bells on “Ivy,” or why some of the imagery in the songs is wintery.

I can hear that in the guitar on “‘Tis the Damn Season,” too. It almost sounds like the National with that very icy guitar line.

I mean, that is literally like, me in my most natural state. [laughs] If you hand me a guitar, that’s what it sounds like when I start playing it. People associate that sound with the National, but that’s just because I finger-pick an electric guitar like that a lot — if you solo the guitar on “Mr. November,” it’s not unlike that.

That song, to me, has always felt nostalgic or like some sort of longing. And the song that Taylor wrote is so instantly relatable, you know, “There’s an ache in you put there by the ache in me.” I remember when she sang that to me in my kitchen — she had written it overnight during The Long Pond Studio Sessions, actually.

Did she record all her Evermore vocals at Long Pond while you were filming the Studio Sessions documentary?

Not all of them, but most of them. She stayed after we were done filming and then we recorded a lot. It was crazy because we were getting ready to make that film, but at the same time, these songs were accumulating. And so we thought, “Hmm, I guess we should just stay and work.”

On “Closure,” there are parts where Taylor’s vocals are filtered through the Messina, which is this vocal modifier that Justin Vernon uses a lot in his work with Bon Iver. How were you able to modify her vocals with it, if she was never in the same room as Justin?

I went to see Justin at one point — that’s the one trip I’ve made — and we worked together at his place on stuff. He plays the drums on “Cowboy Like Me” and “Closure,” and he plays guitar and banjo and sings on “Ivy,” and sings on “Marjorie” and “Evermore.” And then we processed Taylor’s vocals through his Messina chain together. He was really deeply involved in this record, even more so than the last record. He’s always been such a huge help to me, and not just by getting him to play stuff or sing stuff — I can also send him things and get his feedback. We’ve done a ton of work together, but we have different perspectives and different harmonic brains. He obviously has his own studio set up at home, but it was nice to be able to see him and work on this stuff.

“No Body, No Crime” is also really interesting, just because I don’t think I’ve ever heard you produce a song like that. How did this country murder ballad featuring Haim end up on the record?

Taylor wrote that one alone and sent me a voice memo of her playing guitar — she wrote it on this rubber-bridge guitar that I got for her. It’s the same kind I play on “Invisible String.” So she wrote “No Body, No Crime” and sent me a voice memo of it, and then I started building on that. It’s funny, because the music I’ve listened to the most in my life are things that are more like that — roots music, folk music, country music, old-school rock & roll, the Grateful Dead. It’s not really the sound of the National or other things I’ve done, but it feels like a warm blanket.

That song also had a lot of my friends on it — Josh Kaufman, who played harmonica on “Betty,” also plays harmonica on this one and some guitar. JT Bates plays the drums on that song — he’s an amazing jazz guitarist, but he also has an incredible feel [for rhythm] when it comes to a song like that. He also played the drums on “Dorothea.” And then Taylor had specific ideas from the beginning about references and how she wanted it to feel, and that she wanted the Haim sisters to sing on it. We had them record the song with Ariel Reichshaid, they sent that from L.A., and then we put it together when Taylor was here [at Long Pond]. They’re an incredible band, and it was another situation where we were like, “Well, this happened.” It felt like this weird little rock & roll history anecdote.

You also brought on the National to record “Coney Island.” What was that process like, where you’re recording a song with your band that’s for a different artist?

I had been working on a bunch of music with my brother [Bryce Dessner], some of which we were sending to Taylor also. At that stage, “Coney Island” was all the music except the drums. And as I was writing it, I don’t think I was ever thinking, “This sounds like the National or this sounds like Big Red Machine or this sounds like something totally different.” But Taylor and William Bowery wrote this incredible song, and we first recorded it with just her vocals. It has this really beautiful arc to the story, and I think it’s one of the strongest, lyrically and musically. But listening to the words, we all collectively realized that this does feel like the most related to the National — it almost feels like a story Matt [Berninger] might tell, or I could hear Bryan [Devendorf] playing the drum part.

So we started talking about how it would be cool to get the band, and I called Matt and he was excited for it. We got Bryan to play drums and we got Scott [Devendorf] to play bass and a pocket piano, and Bryce helped produce it. It’s weird, because it does really feel like Taylor, obviously, since she and William Bowery wrote all the words, but it also feels like a National song in a good way. I love how Matt and Taylor sound together. And it was nice because we haven’t played a show in a year, and I don’t know when we will again. You kind of lose track of each other, so in a way, it was nice to reconnect.

When working on Folklore, you had to keep most of your collaborators in the dark about who you were working with. What was the process like this time around, now that everyone knew it was Taylor? How did you keep it a secret?

It was hard. We had to be secretive because of how much people are consuming every shred of information they can find about her, and that’s been an oppressive reality she’s had to deal with. But the fact that no one in the public knew allowed for more freedom of enjoying the process. A lot of the same musicians that played on Folklore played on Evermore. Again, it was a situation where I didn’t tell them what it was, and they couldn’t hear her vocals, but I think a lot of them assumed, especially because of the level of secrecy. [laughs] But as funny as this is, I think everyone who’s been involved has been grateful for these records to play on this year and is proud of them. It kind of just doesn’t happen, to make two great records in such a short period of time. Everyone’s a little bit like, “How did this happen?” and nobody takes it for granted.

Taylor has mentioned that you recorded “Happiness” just a week before the album was released. Was that something you guys wrote, recorded, and produced all at the last minute, or was it something you’d been sitting on for a while before you finally cracked the code?

There were two songs like that. One is a bonus track called “Right Where You Left Me,” and the other one was “Happiness,” which she wrote literally days before we were supposed to master. That’s similar to what happened with Folklore, with “The 1” and “Hoax,” which she wrote days before. We mixed all the tracks here, and it’s a lot to mix 17 songs, it’s like a Herculean task. And it was funny, because I walked into the studio and Jon Low, our engineer here, was mixing and had been working the whole time toward this. And I came in and he’s in the middle of mixing and I was like, “There are two more songs.” And he looked at me like, “…We’re not gonna make it.” Because it does take a lot of time to work out how to finish them.

But she sang those remotely. And the music for “Happiness” is something that I had been working on since last year. I had sang a little bit on it, too — I thought it was a Big Red Machine song, but then she loved the instrumental and ended up writing to it. Same with the other one, “Right Where You Left Me” — it was something I had written right before I went to visit Justin, because I thought, “Maybe we’ll make something when we’re together there.” And Taylor had heard that and wrote this amazing song to it. That is a little bit how she works — she writes a lot of songs, and then at the very end she sometimes writes one or two more, and they often are important ones.

My favorite song on the album is “Marjorie,” and I feel like, for most artists, the instinct would be to present a song like that as a somber piano ballad. But “Marjorie” has this lively electronic beat that runs through it — it literally sounds alive. How did you come up with that?

It’s interesting, because with “Marjorie,” that’s a track that actually existed for a while, and you can hear elements of it behind the song “Peace.” This weird drone that you hear on “Peace,” if you pay attention to the bridge of “Marjorie,” you’ll hear a little bit of that in the distance. Some of what you hear is from my friend Jason Treuting playing percussion, playing these chord sticks, that he actually made for a piece that my brother wrote called “Music for Wooden Strings.” They’re playing these chord sticks, and you can hear those same chord sticks on the National song “Quiet Light.”

I collect a lot of rhythmic elements like that, and all kinds of other sounds, and I give them to my friend Ryan Olson, who’s a producer from Minnesota and has been developing this crazy software called Allovers Hi-Hat Generator. It can take sounds, any sounds, and split them into identifiable sound samples, and then regenerate them in randomized patterns that are weirdly very musical. There’s a lot of new Big Red Machine songs that use those elements. But I’ll go through it and find little parts that I like and loop them. That’s how I made the backing rhythm of “Marjorie.” Then I wrote a song to it, and Taylor wrote to that. In a weird way, it’s one of the most experimental songs on the album — it doesn’t sound that way, but when you pick apart the layers underneath it, it’s pretty interesting.

I do have to ask: How did you come to find out about William Bowery’s real identity as Joe Alwyn? Or did you know all along?

I guess I can say now that I’ve sort of known all along — I was just being careful. Although we never really explicitly talked about it. But I do think it’s been really special to see a number of songs on these albums that they wrote together. William plays the piano on “Evermore,” actually. We recorded that remotely. That was really important to me and to them, to do that, because he also wrote the piano part of “Exile,” but on the record, it’s me playing it because we couldn’t record him easily. But this time, we could. I just think it’s an important and special part of the story.

Do you have a personal favorite song or a moment that you’re proudest of?

“‘Tis the Damn Season” is a really special song to me for a number of reasons. When I wrote the music to it, which was a long time ago, I remember thinking that this is one of my favorite things I’ve ever made, even though it’s an incredibly simple musical sketch. But it has this arc to it, and there’s this simplicity in the minimalism of it and the kind of drum programming in there, and I always loved the tone of that guitar. When Taylor played the track and sang it to me in my kitchen, that was a highlight of this whole time. That track felt like something I have always loved and could have just stayed music, but instead, someone of her incredible storytelling ability and musical ability took it and made something much greater. And it’s something that we can all relate to. It was a really special moment, not unlike how it felt when she wrote “Peace,” but even more so.

Do you see this collaboration with Taylor continuing onward, to more albums or Big Red Machine projects?

It’s kind of the thing where I have so many musicians in my life that I’ve grown close to, and make things with, and are just part of my life. And I’ve rarely had this kind of chemistry with anyone in my life — to be able to write together, to make so many beautiful songs together in such a short period of time. Inevitably, I think we will continue to be in each other’s artistic and personal lives. I don’t know exactly what the next form that will take, but certainly, it will continue.

I do think this story, this era, has concluded, and I think in such a beautiful way with these sister records — it does kind of feel like there’s closure to that. But she’s definitely been very helpful and engaged with Big Red Machine, and just in general. She feels like another incredible musician that I’ve gotten to know and am lucky to have in my life. It’s this whole community that moves forward and takes risks and, hopefully, there will be other records that appear in the future.

[dornish-queen]

Pedro Pascal: “I already took all my drugs very early. In middle age, a hangover is not an option ”

When he was approaching 40, he resigned himself to having sporadic papers that would allow him to pay the rent. But playing Oberyn Martell in 'Game of Thrones' changed his life and opened the doors of 'Narcos'. Since then it has not stopped. Now he's the villain from the blockbuster 'Wonder Woman 1984'

JUAN SANGUINO

THE ANGELS OCT 2, 2020 - 3:19 PM EDT

The first big opportunity of his career was presented in 2011, when he participated in the pilot episode of Wonder Woman for NBC, but the network discarded the series and Pedro Pascal returned to his main occupation: casting castings to play the criminal of the week in the Law and order of duty. “That cancellation was a disappointment, of course, I wanted to work. I did not care if it was something good or bad, I just wanted to work, "he recalls today from his home in Los Angeles during a virtual conversation with ICON. Now Pascal plays the villain of Wonder Woman 1984 , one of the blockbusters destined to return audiences to movie theaters .

How can you not believe in fate? The boy who broke his arm twice playing Indiana Jones has ended up becoming the favorite hero of the kids (the bounty hunter in The Mandalorian ), his parents (Agent Peña in Narcos ) and, well, everyone's. world (Oberyn Martell, The Red Viper, in Game of Thrones ). When Pedro was little, the good guys were always white and the bad guys were Russian, Arab or Latino. The Wonder Woman 1984 villain , however, is a white billionaire played by a Chilean.

“The film is set in the United States of the eighties, which were marked by capitalist greed. It was a tainted concept of evil. Stripped of humanity, but still absolutely attractive and alluring. People who dreamed of being rich and successful had to be salivated. It is true that at that time villains in the cinema projected a xenophobic image. Now the white man can finally be the bad guy, ”explains Pascal.

 Some already compare his character, Maxwell Lord, to Donald Trump because of that muck in this mud: Reagan's glorification of rogue moguls in America turned guys like Trump into aspirational role models and glamorous stars. “Trump was not the core of inspiration for my character, on our costume designer's board were Gordon Gekko [Michael Douglas on Wall Street ], American Psycho's Patrick Bateman and other suckers in expensive eighties suits. All those millionaires who hid despair, unbridled ambition and terrified masculinity ”, he clarifies. If Pedro Pascal sounds like a socialist infiltrated in Hollywood it is because that is exactly what he is.

“When Reagan was elected, many people around me were frustrated that the worst forms of capitalism were winning. In my home, with refugee and socialist parents, conservatism was not demonized but it did go against what was important to my family, ”he says. Pascal's father, José Balmaceda, was an Allende supporter doctor who saved the life of a priest wounded by Pinochet's militia .

The priest was later tortured and ended up confessing the name of his savior. When the police went to look for Balmaceda at the hospital where he worked, he took his wife and the newborn Pedro and jumped over the wall of the Venezuelan embassy in Santiago de Chile to request political asylum. That's why Pedro ended up growing up in San Antonio (Texas), in a socialist home but in Reagan's land. A Chilean with no memories of Chile who was called Peter in high school.

At the age of 20, Pascal was in Madrid working as a go-go and keeps good memories. Here she is wearing a Prada sweater. Photo: Danielle DeGrasse-Alston / Realization: Warren Alfie Baker

The Chilean-born but US-raised actor wears a Paul Smith sweater and suit. Photo: Danielle DeGrasse-Alston / Realization: Warren Alfie Baker

Pascal has never left the immigrant mentality behind. Even his father, who came to open a practice in California, always lived in terror that at any moment everything could vanish. “It doesn't matter who you are, how much you are working or how much you get paid. Deep down you always think that each job is the last one ”, confesses the actor. Maybe that's why he didn't dare move from his Red Hook, Brooklyn, hovel to a house more suitable for a Hollywood star until filming for Kingsman 2 and Narcos was over . Nor is it that he had spent more than an entire week at his house since, in 2014, Game of Thrones made him the guy most people would want to party with.

Pascal knew right away that Oberyn Martell, the Westerosi rockstar who always seemed willing to fight or fornicate with the same bravado, was going to change his life. “I had done a lot of castings for friends' plays, for copier factory ads or for very serious independent films that no one was going to see, while I watched how many characters that I had been about to play changed the lives of others. actors. And thanks to my experience and maturity, I recognized the potential of Oberyn. I understood who he was and who he could be ”, he presumes.

The actor found out about the audition when one of his acting students told him that he had taken the test but had been discarded because of his youth. Pedro snapped up and must have thought, “What would Oberyn do?” So he recorded a video on his phone and sent it to his good friend, actress Sarah Paulson . She passed it on to her good friend actress Amanda Peet and this one to her husband, David Benioff, one of the creators of Game of Thrones . The rest is the history of television and headaches: when he informed the Narcos producer that he was available to play Pablo Escobar's pursuing policeman, he accused him of making a spoiler for Game of Thrones: If Pascal had a free agenda, it is because Oberyn was going to lose his fight against La Montaña . He couldn't imagine, of course, in what way.

  Part of that electric, lively and hedonistic energy of Oberyn comes to Pascal from the summer (that of 1996) that he spent in Madrid, where in addition to studying he worked as a go-go in a disco. That stay was transformative because the actor realized that he had had to adapt his identity all his life with each new move, but in Madrid he felt effortlessly at home. “I was 20 years old and I liked it so much that I almost moved. My main language is English, I have an American accent and I can pass for white. But in my house there were many cultural differences with respect to the outside world and I remember that when I was 20 years old, when I came to Madrid, I felt very comfortable in my own skin in a way that I had never felt anywhere else. I guess I was not aware that I had spent my childhood and adolescence learning new ways of adapting, connecting, learning, and pulling. On the contrary, living in Madrid was organic and easy for me. I made friends right away and I felt supported, ”he recalls.

By the time he was 40 Pascal was resigned to being an actor with enough odd jobs to pay the rent. According to him, his aquiline nose was a bad nose by Hollywood standards. Far from being offended or frustrated by this typecasting, he was looking forward to it, if it translated into a new check. “It is very strange to develop a fantasy as a child, to have the opportunity to turn it into a hobby, then some studies and finally transform all that into a career. That is the bet. But my dream of becoming Leonardo DiCapriodied. He died dozens and dozens of times. So to move on he had to accept that, at best, he was going to be an actor with a job. That was already a triumph, "he says. "Also, I accepted that I was not qualified for anything else, I had no more skills: I had put all my time, my energy and my concentration in being an actor and the rest in living life and having fun."

That absence of vanity lives on today, even when he's been involved in large-scale projects for five years without stopping. After Game of ThronesHe has made eight films, of which seven are action blockbusters. The wave of fame came to him when he was no longer expecting it but when he was well prepared to ride it. Still, every workday is a surprise and she acknowledges that what amazes her most about Hollywood is the sheer physical stamina that people have. “Sometimes a project can look like building a city, with all the hours, all the work and all the energy it requires. Some people have better stamina and can get by with little sleep. That is an interesting contradiction: all the people creatively involved in a film have a special sensitivity and at the same time have developed a very tough skin and energy to go through the physical experience of shooting it, ”he admires.

 Then Pascal switches to Spanish (the language he uses to confess intimacies) and explains, in a few words, that he is old for this shit. “I thought I had all the energy in the world and now, in my 40s, I see that ... wow! There are times when I don't know if I will be able to reach the goal, because my energy is not at the necessary level. But I always take it forward ”, he guarantees. Maybe that's why people get so high in Hollywood. Pascal responds between laughter and again in Spanish.

“I already took all my drugs very early. It is something that is already too much in the past, and in middle age a hangover is not an option. No, no, no ”, she assures. What if the other hangover, that of the wave of fame, runs over you? “I was a good waiter. Not at first, because they fired me many times, but I ended up getting the hang of it, ”he jokes. If the Hollywood thing doesn't go well, you can always put drinks again. But for now Pedro Pascal is the personification that the American dream , although sometimes it takes a little longer to materialize, really exists. Even Ronald Reagan would be proud.

source

[harringtonstudios]

best friend’s ex.

plot: he’s your best friend’s ex and you should stay away. 

A/N: i wrote this in one sitting and it’s very long <3 took some creative liberty here so imagine 2020!kells but he hasn’t made it just quite yet in the industry. this is heavily based off the song release tonight with blackbear so enjoy (maybe while listening!)

masterlist!

The circles in New York are different than the ones in Los Angeles. There’s a hint of familiarity in the New York circles, everyone seems to know each other connected by one person or a distant story of that one night the whole crowd tripped on molly. It’s dizzying, intricately knowing every single person backstage or at some club without recognizing them exactly.

You haven’t gotten used to the life, not yet acclimated with the high-fives and looks thrown your way at a party, or the nameless phone numbers crowding your text messages. It’s all new, fun and exciting and you have no one to thank but your best friend.

She’s made for this life, for the late nights and the rushes, the sticky floors and glittery lipgloss. This is her environment, where she thrives, and sometimes when you look at her in the club, necklaces shining with the overhead lights, you find it hard to connect this Domi to the one who you’ve seen crying on your bedroom floor after watching a despairing animal shelter commercial. But then she throws you a grin, crowds close, drapes her arm over your shoulder, and it just makes sense.

It’s been years of friendship, ever since you two met at freshman orientation for college. Her roommate was terrible, and more often than not, she’d be camping out on your twin-sized bed, offering you bites of her snacks in exchange for a safe haven. You both hadn’t really been into the party scene at school, too busy scrambling for reports and fibbing results for the endless lab sessions.

Domi graduated a semester early, spent an entire summer taking accelerated classes so she could go fly off to New York right before the new year started. That’s when things seemed to change. You’d been upset with her, hints of jealousy tinging in when she’d send you pictures of fancy clothes and people she was hanging out with, the nicely decorated venues she’d find herself in. She invited you to come to the city a few weeks in, buzzing on Facetime about backstage passes.

Then you were graduating yourself, packing two suitcases and jetting halfway across the country to live in the shitty apartment Domi’d been renting out with a couple of strangers. It had been hard to settle down at first, the air was different in the city and you’d had to up your resting bitch face game when you sat on the subways late at night, but before you knew it, you were enjoying the city that never sleeps, best friend right by your side.

Colson had stumbled into your life a year ago, and then been ripped out six months after. He was a up and coming musician (self-proclaimed) and had taken a chance bet on the city, moved from Cleveland with his friends and a mixtape. He was beautiful in a rugged way, angled cheekbones and lanky limbs, but Domi had taken one look and called dibs, so you tampered any attraction down.

It hadn’t taken long for them to start dating, even if Domi claimed they were just fooling around, it was clear to see that there was some level of intimacy there, a relationship itching to be formed. You’d been happy for her truly and it was easier than you’d expected to fall into a camaraderie with the guys.

Colson’s friends were funny, quick on their toes and absolutely chaotic. They fit into New York better than you did, and almost every single night, you would find yourself at their apartment, playing shitty drinking games and jamming to loud music.

Domi kept the relationship as lowkey as she could, and at some point, you would hear less and less about Colson. It didn’t really hit you then, but it was the beginning of the end in a way, and then she was walking in, eyes red and wet before yelling out the fated words, “We broke up.”

Everything you had gotten used to was suddenly taken away. You spent weeks consoling her, reminding her that she was better than this guy, stronger and that time was the only way this would heal. She begrudgingly listened, and then took your phone from you, casually blocking Colson’s number along with all his friends.

At first, you’d been mildly upset. She was the one who’d fucked up, the one who’d decided to break up with him, so why was this effecting you? It didn’t make sense, they were still your friends and you liked them more than anyone else you’d met here.

But then she’d given you her patented puppy dog eyes, and you’d dismissed it, decided that if this was what she wanted, so be it. You could stand to lose the drunken nights, your liver would thank you.

Colson Baker and his friends disappeared from your life as fast as they had appeared into it. You spent your nights cooking at home instead of going out, focused on building back your sleep schedule instead of getting drunk off your mind, and the days went by.

-

Of course, nothing lasts forever and six months later, your coworkers’ are begging you for a night out, like the old times. Everyone’s antsy for your reply, know that you haven’t been to a social function with them in ages, and you take one look at their faces before sighing and agreeing.

The entire office claps, you flip them all off before catching sight of your boss, who simply smiles and shakes his head. There’s a faint flutter in your stomach, memories rising from months ago, parties and late nights, flashes of lights and thumping music. You shrug it off, tap your pen against the desk, bring your focus back to work.

Three hours later, you’re catching the train back home. It isn’t exactly rush hour yet, you’ve gotten out a little earlier than usual, Friday evenings usually being dull at work anyway and you’re glad because there’s less people mulling around in the sticky heat of the train station.

The station doesn’t smell great, there’s a tinge of stale pee filling up the air and you discreetly move to the other side of the station, trying to get as far away from the smell as you can. New York City man.

The train pulls in, and you automatically put in your headphones, music blasting in your ears as you sidle into the train car, passing the passengers coming out. It’s relatively empty, being near the front and you thank the train gods before sliding into an orange seat near the door.

There’s a couple of guys sitting at the other end, they’re loud and boisterous, shoving each other and you give them a once-over before settling into the seat. The train moves, and you pull your purse onto your lap, patting it once before letting your eyes fall close.

The next stop comes abruptly, jolting you out of the little dreamscape you’d created. There’s a shout as the doors open and you pause your music trying to tune into what’s going on. It’s still the group of guys, but now there’s more of them and you roll your eyes at the banter drifting across the car.

The music starts up again and you lean your head back, try to get comfortable again, but it doesn’t work. There’s a weird feeling in your gut, making you uneasy but you brush it off, raise the volume until all you can feel is the dirty bass.

A minute later, someone kicks at your shoes and you open your eyes, ready to angrily scold at them until they can feel the rage across the car.

The words die in your throat. Colson Baker’s standing there in all his glory, lanky arm leaning against the metal, blonde hair puffing around his head, grin lighting up his face.

His nose is pierced now and you take it in, the way it brings out his eyes and you pause the music mumbling out, “Nose ring looks good on you.”

You bite your tongue right after, embarrassed that after months of silence that’s the first thing that falls out of your mouth. He laughs, body shaking and you’re flashed back to nights in his apartment, watching him laugh on the other couch, head thrown back.

“Thanks,” he murmurs before going, “How’ve you been?”

“Good,” you answer honestly and there’s another shout from across the car, Colson turning to wave a hand.

“It’s the guys. They didn’t think it was you, but I could tell yanno,” he explains and you raise your eyebrows as he continues, “They’re all still kinda pissed you blocked us.”

The statement falls between you two, awkwardly as the train car rumbles on. You wince a little as he fake coughs to fill the empty space.

“Yeah, I’m sorry about all that man. You guys were like family,” you carefully mention, hands playing with the hair tie on your wrist.

“It’s cool. I get it, I mean we both know Domi,” he stammers out and his own hand goes to rub at his chin.

This conversation isn’t what either of you expected and you shift up in your seat, trying to change the topic at the mention of your best friend.

“So what’ve you been up to?” you ask and he smiles at the gateway question, eager to get rid of the uncomfortable energy.

“Got signed to a record label,” he murmurs and the smile that takes over your face is unreal. There’s pride blooming in your chest.

“No way!! Oh my god, congrats dude. That’s killer,” you gush out and his cheeks taint red at your words.

“Thanks,” he says, eyes meeting yours.

“I knew you’d do it. You’re immensely talented,” you continue on as the train comes to a stop.

It’s not yours but it seems to be his. The guys all shout over at him and he’s looking up and then gazing at you, caught between the two options before he makes up his mind.

He doesn’t choose you, you’re not surprised.

“I appreciate you!” he shouts out before running off the car, joining the rest of the guys on the station.

You turn in your seat and wave at them, catching a couple of glares and hesitant waves back before the car pulls away, to the next destination.

The music starts up again and you will your heart to slow down for reasons you can’t even comprehend.

-

Domi gives you a look as you rush into your room. Usually after work, you spend time in the kitchen, milling around grabbing little snacks as she cooks, but you actually have plans tonight.

It’s the first time you’re going out in months and you take a quick shower before pulling out all the old outfits you’d shoved into the back of your closet.

There’s a nice dress, black with faint traces of glitter and you eye it for a second before deciding against it. This is a fun night with the coworkers, not your insane best friend who’d always managed to get you to dress your very best.

There’s a pair of skinny jeans tossed into a dresser, and you eye the rips in it before pulling it on. It looks good, tight in all the right places and you root around for a shirt that can be just fancy enough.

There’s a nice purple one tossed in the closet, slipping off of a hanger and you grab it before pulling it on and tying it up in the front.

It’s pretty, makes you look just right and you play around with your hair before sitting down and committing to a makeup look.

Fifteen minutes later, you’re throwing your keys, a pack of gum, gloss and your phone into a small purse. It hangs off of your wrist and you take a look in the mirror before stepping out of your room.

“Where are you going?” Domi asks, her tone slightly cold.

“Night out. Coworkers invited me and I couldn’t say no,” you explain, running your hands down the jeans.

“Oh,” her face falls.

“Do I-look good?” you ask hesitantly.

“Yeah. You always do bitch,” she half-heartedly adds and you smile at her.

“I’ll see you tonight,” you say, grabbing a carrot from the countertop.

“I’ll wait up,” she smirks and you nod before heading out the door.

The club’s only a few stops away and when you swipe your metro card again, you groan at how low the funds are running. You haven’t filled it just yet, and the $1.25 flashes up at you, taunting.

“I’m poor,” you scoff at the machine and the girl swiping next to you laughs.

You get in somehow, sneakily using the swinging baby stroller door and by the time the train pulls up, you’re only running a few minutes late.

It only hits you when you sink into the familiar orange seat that you didn’t tell Domi about running into her ex. You know she doesn’t care as much about Colson now, scorchingly refers to him as that one rapper, but it’s an unspoken rule. You always tell if you run into the ex.

Your fingers tap against your phone screen, wondering if texting her is appropriate but you drop it quickly. It’s not a big deal. You’ll just let her know when you get home tonight.

The doors open, you leave and then you’re stalking towards the club doors, eyeing the long line. The bouncer is staring everyone down, and you wade up to the front. You’ve learned enough tricks in the short party lifestyle you’d had.

“I’m with the VIPs,” you flash your ID and then a $5 discreetly tucked under it. He looks you up and down, grumbles slightly before taking the money from you.

The rope opens and you smile before stepping through into the dark. It’s loud inside already, the lights contrasting the slight evening colors from outside. You look around before you spot the team and walk over to them.

“Hey!!!” they exclaim and then you’re being handed a glass, cheering the night as everyone drinks it down.

It’s tequila, stings in the back of your throat and you cough before wiping your mouth, “God, I haven’t had this in so long.”

“See that’s why we needed you out tonight,” one of them goes, checking your shoulder with theirs. You laugh before agreeing and order your drink of choice, chiming into the conversation.

It’s going so well, the night seems to be twinged with good vibes. You feel nice and loose, arm draped over your nearest friend as you two sway at the songs playing.

There’s a commotion at the door and you guys turn towards the bouncer only to see people scuffling around, pushing to get closer.

“Hey dude! I’m playing tonight. Musical guest here!!!” comes a loud voice, and it rings familiar in your head. It’s faint, digging somewhere into the back of your mind and you get on your tip-toes trying to see.

“Fuck you,” someone else spits and it echoes around the club.

The crowd splits open then, and you get a glimpse at old friends, adjusting their hats as they stalk across to the stage.

Rook’s fuming as he walks past you, and you spot the tell-tale crease on his face, the grit of his teeth. It scares you, the memory of it all after late night game losses, the way he would blow a gasket about cheating.

Slim and Baze wander behind him, they seem cooler, always are, but the anger is brimming under and you look away as they pass you.

AJ isn’t there and you guess he’s already in the club. He’s always been the sensible one, stable and ready to take control of the situation when it inevitably turns bad.

Colson’s following the rest but his eyes are on the crowd, hand going out to meet people, smiling at everyone. There’s a faint cut on his lip, blood trickling out and you want to scream at him. He comes up around to where you’re standing, and you step back, let your coworkers high five him as he passes.

He doesn’t see you, it’s better that way.

You order up another drink, ignore the whispers of the pesky rapper as they fill up the air around you. He’s well known here apparently, people aware of him in the scene. They mumble about the fights, the way he never seems to show up without a cut or bruise.

You take a shot, sip at the alcohol, smile fading as your coworker ravishes on about how good looking the musician is.

It takes about twenty minutes, and then the music shuts off. There’s a squeal of microphone feedback and everyone around you ducks, hands rushing up to cover their ears.

“Fuck,” a mumble comes across the sound system.

There’s another shuffle and your friend grabs your arm, pulling you closer to the stage. There’s already people there, milling around, clutching drinks and you try to stay on the sidelines, out of view.

“We should go closer,” he determines and then you’re being pulled forward again, swimming around in the second row.

Colson is standing front and center in all his glory. The shitty lighting makes him glow, and he looks big, energy filling him up. He pulls the mic off the stand and steps back before going, “Afternoon. We are Machine Gun Kelly.”

The name isn’t familiar. You don’t know it and quite frankly, it doesn’t place anywhere either but that’s all you get before the music starts up. It’s weird, a pace you don’t expect from him and then he’s off, singing with a grit in his voice, fingers flying across a guitar draped over his shoulder.

Everyone seems to bob along in the crowd and you do too, losing yourself in the way he sounds, the tone of his voice as he croons. The music is great, drums harsh and strong, guitar loud behind the vocals.

The set’s over quick and you’re slightly sweating by the end of it. He thanks the crowd before jumping off stage, and you immediately retreat back to the bar, anxious to steer clear of him.

Even in your drunken state of mind, it’s a bright red flashing light: Stay away from Colson. Stay away from the guys.

You switch to water for a while, try to stop your head from spinning with the lights. Everyone you came with is somewhere on the dance floor, so when an arm drapes on your shoulders, you freeze up, still facing the bar.

“Hey,” and then you’re looking up at Slim’s face, sweaty and eager.

“Slim,” you breathe out, vice in your chest loosening at the fact that it isn’t Colson. You don’t know why this is better, but it is.

“What’re you drinking?” he asks, hand going up to call over the bartender.

You don’t have the heart to say water, know that he’ll laugh and then get you a beer, so you murmur, “Get me a shot of vodka?”

His smile widens and he shouts the drink order over the counter before dropping his arm, “You sipping the hard stuff now?”

Shaking your head, you respond, “I’ve always drank the hard stuff.”

“Yeah, back when we hung out,” he slips into the banter, and your heart stops. You didn’t realize it had hurt them this bad, that months later, drunk and high off of a good show, Slim still manages to bring it up, voice tightening slightly.

“Look, I’m sorry about all that. I really am,” you start, but then he’s passing you the drink and locking arms.

“Cheers,” he says and you clink your shot glass against his, tipping it back.

“I’m sorry,” you mumble out but he throws you a look.

“Don’t worry about it,” he says and then he’s shouting out, “Yo Kells!”

It clicks into place then, the Machine Gun Kelly. It’s his nickname, has been for years apparently since he was rapping in middle school hallways, but he’d always introduced himself as Colson to new friends, let them decide whether the Kells fit him or not.

You hadn’t called him Kells once, in the months of knowing him, had laughed about it a couple of times with Domi, who loved to mock it any chance she could.

“You stalking me?” Kells sleazes out, there’s already a drink in his hand, someone following him around with bright eyes.

“No,” you state, moving away from the counter. The red lights are in full effect, this could end up terribly.

“Seems like it,” he sums up, coming in closer to lean against the bar. His lip is still cut, looks swollen as he approaches you.

“You fucked up your lip,” you state, mind cursing at the lack of filter you seem to have around your best friend’s ex.

“What?” he goes, and then his fingers are rubbing at the fat lip, eyes scrunching, “Guess I did.”

“Well it was nice to see you again,” you try.

“I just got here, you leaving already?” he murmurs, brushing off the person following him.

Slim’s moved to the other end of the bar, Rook’s throwing you a glare.

“Don’t think your friends want me around,” you nod over.

He turns his head and makes some kind of motion. Rook drops his eye contact, head going to duck at the bar. Slim smiles.

“They don’t know what’s good for them,” he mumbles, head turning back. His fingers tap at the bar, and there’s a beer appearing. He smiles at the bartender.

“I’m good for them?” you scoff, there’s a hint of bitterness at your tone, but it’s not directed exactly at them. It isn’t their fault.

“Always have been. The good influence when we would try and do stupid shit,” he says thoughtfully. He’s almost as drunk as you, eyes slightly red.

You laugh at that, “You’re always doing stupid shit. Great set by the way, impressed the fuck out of me.”

“You didn’t expect it?” he says as if you were supposed to have known all his songs by heart.

“I haven’t heard any of your music,” you honestly reply.

“Not even the mixtapes?” he seems shocked.

“No, Domi never sent them to me and you all just assumed so,” you stop yourself, falling into dangerous territory.

At the name drop of his ex, he winces a little, “God she was a fucking head-case.”

“Hey that’s my best friend you’re talking about,” you shout a little too loud. You catch Slim slamming a hand onto Rook’s shoulder. The air becomes stifled.

“Sorry,” Colson offers, taking a long, pointed sip.

You sigh, “Don’t be. She can be a little much sometimes. I’m sorry for how it all ended.”

“You should hang with us tonight,” he calmly says, switching the subject. Your breath catches in your throat.

“I don’t know-“ you start.

He cuts you off, “I get it. If you want, we’ll be here for a while. Find us.”

That’s all you get and then he’s walking towards the gang, slipping into the crowd. You drop your head onto the shell covered bar, groaning out.

-

The night dwindles down, your coworkers trickle out, slamming messy kisses on your face before walking out. You’re left by yourself soon enough and there’s a pulsing in your head, matching the music vibrating under your shoes.

It doesn’t take long to decide. You want to hang out with Colson and them, with Machine Gun Kelly. It’s a bad idea, you can tell before you’ve even fully determined it, but it’s as if fate’s lined everything up for you. It’s gonna happen.

You push away the nagging thoughts, wander around the club trying to find someone, coming up empty. Everyone seems to have left and you roll your eyes before stepping out yourself. Maybe fate doesn’t want this to happen.

As soon as the thought crosses your mind, you spot Rook across the street, blunt in hand. He hasn’t seen you, looking down at his shoes but you know him well and if he’s around it means the others are close by.

You brace yourself, work up some form of courage and walk over. He looks up at the sound and there’s immediate dislike flashing across his face.

Out of everyone, Rook’s been the most temperamental. You’d thought it was going to be Colson at first glance, but were quickly proven wrong by his friend, by the harshness of his demeanor at times. He doesn’t hide his feelings, and while you respect that, you’re also intimidated by his posturing.

“Hey Rook,” you mumble.

“Y/N,” he bluntly states.

“How have you been?” you try, but immediately know it’s the wrong thing to say.

“Cut the shit. What’d you want?” he bites out, eyes hard.

“Was wondering if I could catch a ride with you guys?” you question. 

AJ usually drives them around, his black van large enough for the gang, and his self control strong enough to stay sober. You don’t know if it’s changed since the last time everyone hung out, but you’re hoping it hasn’t for the sake of your almost empty metrocard.

“Why’d you think we drove here?” he’s shrugs, giving you a hard time, and you shake your head wondering if your pride is worth this.

“Never mind dude,” you turn around but then he’s groaning behind you.

“Yeah we’ll take you back home. Kells’ kill me if I let you walk around here drunk. C’mon,” he says and you try to hide your smile as you follow him.

He takes a few more hits before tossing his blunt to the ground, and you’re glad he hasn’t offered you any. It would be too forgiving of him, too close to what you all used to be, and you wouldn’t know what to do if it came to that. Domi would kill you, hell she’d kill you if she knew you were getting into a car with them right now.

He stops in front of the familiar van, opens the door with force and everyone’s shouting inside, clambering over each other. You almost smile at the chaos, the familiarity of it all.

“Y/N!” Colson’s shouting and you do smile then. He slumps over long limbs and comes over to the door, reaching his hand out to you.

“You coming with us?” he asks and you nod before Rook mutters, “She needs a ride home.”

Colson purses his lips before looking back over at you, hand still outstretched, “Yeah, c’mon in. AJ got you.”

It’s late, later than you should be out and there’s a reminder that Domi’s waiting for you back home, wants to hear about your night. Your resolve flickers the minute his hand wraps around yours.

He tugs you in the van, and you follow, stepping in before they all scatter around, making enough space. There’s another girl with them, someone you don’t remember meeting or knowing but she smiles at you and curls into Rook’s side.

The music in the van is almost as loud as in the club, filling up the space. You wonder, not for the first time, how AJ drives like this, how he casually sings along, fist bumping the rest of the guys after a song.

Before you know it, there’s a blunt being passed around. Colson skips you on the first round, and you try not to let it hurt, remind yourself that you’ve stung them harder than this, hurt them worse.

He leans into your space after handing it off, whispers, “You still don’t smoke right?”

There’s a painful twist in your stomach at his question. When you all first met, you wouldn’t smoke blunts with them, hesitant about the strain and Domi’s eyes on you. She hated weed, despised the smell and would always remind you of that fact before you’d all spend the night out.

After the breakup, she’d loosened up on that, didn’t care if you smoked out on the fire escape, and sometimes even joined in, it was weird. Weirder than the fact that Colson somehow remembered all this months later.

“I do,” you whispered back, licking your lips, “smoke I mean.”

“Oh,” he softly says and then the blunt’s coming back around. He barely takes a hit before handing it off to you, pushing your hand slightly with his fist.

“Thanks,” you mumble, smoking it in. It’s strong, brings an immediate rush. You close your eyes.

When you open them, Colson’s too close to you. The red lights flash hard in your head and then the car’s stopping in front of their building.

You don’t even hesitate, “Is it wrong if I come up with you?”

His eyes look into yours, it’s quiet enough that you feel the weight of your statement sink in. This is bad, so bad.

He doesn’t say anything but everyone around you is moving, pulling off instruments and slamming doors. He carefully takes your hand, pulls the blunt out from your other one.

“AJ, we’re gonna chill for a while,” he says, towards the front seat, giving him the blunt. There’s a hum and then he’s opening the door, pulling you out just as he’d pulled you in.

For a second, you hesitate and then you’re falling into him. His arm wraps around your hips, pulls you back up on the sidewalk.

“You okay?” his voice is quiet, the world still moves around you both but it feels like you’re the only two people who matter.

“Yeah,” you nod.

“Wanna go home?” he says, and the words hit you for a second before you shake your head.

“No, this is cool,” you tongue out.

You’re both walking into the building then, satisfied with your answers. The manager gives you a once over at the front desk but that’s all before Colson’s thumbing the elevator button.

“What about everyone else?” you murmur.

He looks at them unloading the van and lets out a laugh, fingers tightening slightly against yours as he shakes, “They’re gonna be busy a while.”

You laugh back, try to tamper down the feeling of seeing him full-body laugh for the second time that day. The elevator dings and you step in, he follows.

It’s the same damn elevator as it was six months ago, but there’s something different in the air right now. It’s staticky, thrumming through you and it feels like you’re stumbling right on the edge of something.

The doors close, it’s just you and him. The feeling gets stronger, his fingers loosen against yours. You grip harder and he looks up straight into your eyes.

The door dings open again and he huffs a little, “Forgot to click the button.”

You smile but it feels thin. Your brain is flashing wrong, flashing red, screaming Domi’s name, but your heart is racing, pounding against your chest.

You screw your eyes shut.

He hits the button, the elevator starts going and you step closer to him. His back is against the elevator wall and there’s a calm look on his face, but you can tell he’s nervous, can feel it in the clamminess of his palm where it’s sticking to yours.

“I’m going to kiss you,” you blurt and you don’t even have time to regret the words before he’s pushing into you, lips finding yours within seconds.

They’re warm and softer than you expected. He lets out a groan as you kiss back, and you’re reminded of his cut, the swollen lip he’s sporting now. You move back, rest your forehead against his.

“Sorry, your lip,” you attempt to explain, but he shakes his head, forehead sliding across yours, twisting it.

“I like it,” he mumbles and you smile before kissing him again, feeling his arm wrap around you, pull you closer.

It’s the first time you’ve kissed him, he’s strictly off limits, a forbidden idea, but it feels like everything has suddenly fallen into place. The warning signs dissolve into bursts of serotonin as he makes little sounds, pressed up with your mouth.

The door dings open. You break apart and step out. Is kiss drunk a thing, or are you losing your mind? He grins at you, pulls your joined hands up for a soft kiss brushing on your knuckles.

Your heart flutters right then. If you’re losing your mind, you’re glad it’s with him. Dealing with the aftermath is something you’ll do later, so you push all thoughts of Domi and her complications aside and follow him straight into his apartment, consequences be damned.

-

taglist:  @iamdorka @no-shxt-sherl @bakerkells @findingmyths @rosegoldrichie​ @mayaslifeinabox​ @itjustkindahappenedreally @hnbtx @backoftheroomandnotbelonging​ @sophroniaa​ @enchantedamusedslightlyconfused​ @calum-defense-squad​

[thr-333]

Mismatch- Part 15

Bio Dad Bruce Wayne Month 2020

Time for Batman to regret all his life decisions!

First< Previous > Next

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“Are you sure you're ready for patrol,” Marinette presses, Marion tries not to roll his eyes once again.

“Yes Nette my ribs are perfectly fine, I can manage,” Marion pulls up his mask, hiding away in an alley not far from the hospital, “besides I need to let off some steam from yesterday,”

“Punching people is no way to deal with your emotions,” Marinette scolds, hiding the Kwamis away in her small bag.

“Of course not,” Marion makes sure the miracle box is in place before swinging his satchel over his back, “Kicking can do far more damage,”

“You don’t deserve an answer for that one,” Marinette sighs, handing over his glasses, “Just make a portal already,”

“Absolutely not,” Kaalki flies out of her bag, “I refuse to be a taxi you can easily get there on your own,”

“Kaalki, the meeting point is halfway across the city,” Marion pleads, the Kwami only turns her nose up at him, “What are we meant to do? Take an actual taxi?”

“I can't believe we’re taking a taxi to meet the Batman for patrol,” Marinette mutters, as Marion tries to hail a cab.

“Don’t be ridiculous,” Marion scoffs, another cab surprisingly passing up the opportunity to drive two masked figures late at night, “We’re taking a taxi to a block away from the meeting point, only amateurs give away their position like that,”

“Really not my point,” Marinette adjusts her bag strap.

“Maybe we can ask Batman if we can keep the grappling hooks?” Marion suggests, a cab pulling up to the curve.

“We’d still have to go a long way, it’s not like our suits where we get increased stamina,” Marinette opens the door, sliding into the car before it can’t leave without them, telling the driver the destination.

“Oh the days where we could get across the city in five minutes,” Marion sighs dreamily, ignoring the balding drivers' sideways glance as he pulls away.

“You mean yesterday?” Marinette teases, sitting behind the driver.

“Really? Feels like a week,” Marion leans back in the seat, cringing at the smell of cigarette smoke.

“You two heroes, rogues or villains?” The driver interrupts, sizing them up in the mirror.

“Is there a price difference?” Marion questions, quirk to his lips.

“Sure is,” The driver grunts, eyes still uncertain if there were any ill intentions.

“Do I have to guess which one?” Marion gets elbowed by Marinette.

“Stop that,” She digs her elbow in further, “We’re vigilantes passing through town, running with Batman for the time being,”

“So he’s gone and picked up new kids?” The driver snorts, finally taking his eyes off them.

“We’re not his kids,” Marinette assures, nope no more surprise parents for them thank you.

“Not more Robins? you’ve got the colors,” The driver says gruffly, sharp corner sending them both off balance.

“Unfortunately only Sparrow here wears tights,” Marion gestures to Marinette, “I just don’t fit the bill,”

“Sparrow?” The driver repeats cynically, he should have heard the ones Batman shot down.

“Yeah she has a codename, but I still can’t decide mine, any ideas,” Marion leans over the passenger seat in front of him.

“You’re asking me?” He snorts, Marinette just shakes her head.

“Always looking for public opinion,” Marion shrugs, only getting a sideways glance his way.

“Bat boy,” The driver decides, Marion stifles a laugh.

“Wow, that's terrible,” Marion doesn’t catch himself in time to stop, but adds, “No offence,”

“You’re going to have to look elsewhere for creativity, boy,” The driver shrugs, not seeming bothered by his bluntness.

“What do you think of Shelley?” Marion does get a look his way this time, grinning at it.

“Shelley?”

“Yeah as in the Shelley Starling, small, blue and orange, from Africa,” Apparently Marion's extra details do nothing to convince him.

“You want to be called Shelley?”

“Yeah can’t you just picture it, ‘Batman and Shelley save the day’,” Marion gestures to an imaginary headline.

“And you thought Bat Boy was bad,” The driver shakes his head, trying to hide his amusement, “Do whatever you want kid,”

“Can I tell Batman I got your approval?” Marion grins, leaning further into the drivers space.

“Don’t bring me into this,” His gruff tone doesn’t hide his smile as he slows to a stop, “Now get out,”

“Thank you very much sir, sorry about him,”  Marinette pushes Marion out of the car, handing over what they owed him

“Just call me Norris, see ya round, Sparrow... Shelley,” Marion beams at him, Norris shaking his head but smiling none the less.

“Bye!” Marion waves as the car drives away, “I like him, what are the chances we see him again?”

“Zero,” Marinette predicts, walking towards the meeting point.

“Where have you two been?” Batman demands more than asks the second they land on the rooftop.

“Hospital,”

“Family business,”

“....”

“Well, we’re clearly not telepathic,” Marion bumps their shoulders, moving to stand next to Batman.

“Sorry, about missing patrol, it's been… hectic the last few days,” Marinette explains, both hoping they won't pry further.

“Right... Sparrow you’re with me on a stake out,” Batman declares, turning to Marion, “You’re with Nightwing and Robin,”

“You got it,” Marion does a mocking salute, turning on his heels towards them.

As he reacquaints himself with the grappling hook, he gets the run down from Nightwing on where their patrol will go. Marion suspected it wasn't their regular patrol route as they start swinging across the city. He says hi to Oracle and Spoiler on the comms. Disappointed that Red Hood wasn't there tonight, but on the plus side he was less likely to get stabbed… or crash through another window.... or fall off a building.... or-

“There's a mugging three blocks to the east,” Oracle informs, the three of them immediately changing their route.

“We still need to decide on your codename,” Nightwing pipes up, once they start a steady pace towards the mugging.

“Not again,” Robin mutters, Marion grins catching himself in free fall.

“I have a few ideas,” And then because he can’t help himself, “Robin what do you think?”

“Tt, you should take this more seriously, so as not to seem like a complete fool,” Robin scoffs, landing perfectly on the edge of a building, a mugger holding another man at gun point just below.

“Hm, it's a bit long for a codename,” Marion drops down into the alley with them, landing on a garbage skip without a sound, “How about just Fool?”

The mugger turns around, startling at Marion and Robin blocking his exit, Robin scowls, hand twitching towards his katana. Either because of the mugger raising his gun or Marion is undecided.

“Maybe not,” Nightwing stands between the Mugger and the victim. Concerned look apparently deciding Robin’s scowl was aimed at him after all. “What were you thinking?”

If he was trying to redirect the conversation away from murder, boy did he choose a bad way to do it.

“Pterodactyl,” Marion grins as the mugger can’t decide who to point his gun at.

“Why!” Robin spins to him, catching Marion's full attention.

“I don’t know,” Marion shrugs, unconcerned with the mugger pointing at him edging forward, “Their closest living relatives are birds, right?”

“That doesn't mean-” Robin lunges forward as the mugger tries to escape.

“-You act like an immature child,” Robin insults, moving to disarm the gun, “Completely lacking professionalism, you actually sang while apprehending criminals,”

“I see it as more a testament to my skill that I can multitask,” Marion dismisses, coming up behind the mugger as Robin distracts him.

“You were almost stabbed several times,” The whites of the domino mask narrow, removing the gun from the mugger's grip.

“And yet I won without a scratch,” Marion sends back a smirk, grabbing the hand that goes to punch Robin taking the mugger off guard, Robin kicks him to the ground.

“If you like singing, how about Songbird?” Nightwing attempts to interrupt Robin’s likely plans to change his ‘without a scratch’ claim.

“I don’t know, there's a taxi driver I met who’s really attached to Shelley,” Marion tries not to give away his excitement at how perfect the name is.

“I’m sure he’ll survive,” Robin deadpans, zip tying the muggers hands as he struggles.

“Hm… sure sounds good,” Marion shrugs, almost bouncing with excitement, This is gonna be fun .

“Then I guess congratulations are in order, Songbird,” Nightwing slings an arm around him, ruffling his hair.

“You hear that?” Marion looks down at the mugger, “Now you get to tell the Police who took you down,”

“Robin?” The man asks, smug smirk on Robin's face.

Songbird steps out of Nightwing's hold. Picks up the mugger easily, as he shouts and struggles in his grasp. It takes slightly more effort to throw him into the open garbage skip next to them, letting the mugger land on the piles of trash.

“Tt, are you a complete child?” Robin scoffs, having to look up at him.

“Really? What are you like nine?” Songbird smirks at his irritation, ignoring the crook yelling.

“ No I am not ,” Robin hisses.

“Sorry, eight,” Songbird’s instincts tell him to take a few steps back, he doesn't listen.

“That wasn’t very professional,” Nightwing’s disapproval showing through his expression, Marion can’t quite shake off the feeling of a disappointed big brother.

“Hm? What? Oh!” He looks towards the mugger that's still shouting at him, whatever, professionalism was for Ladybug, “Oh no I dropped them! I was carrying them with the utmost care then I went and accidentally dropped them!”

Songbird smacks his forehead, schooling the grin off his face. In much the same way Nightwing is clearly trying to.

“I’m such a klutz- let me try and get them out,” Marion slams the lid shut with an echoing bang, “Oh no! My bad, how can I be so uncoordinated? Whatever will I do now!”

“You are strange,” Robin informs, sending out his grappling hook.

“Thank you, it’s a goal of mine,” Songbird bows, sirens can be heard in the distance now.

He double checks the victim that Nightwing has been covering. Smiling brightly at their slight smile. With a little wave he swings out the alley, following Nightwing and Robin.

After continuing on route for a while longer, stopping minor crimes they stop for a mid patrol snack.

“Number one rule don't stand on a ledge,  I have poor impulse control and I will push you,” Marion warns before they sit down on the rooftop.

“What are you a cat?” Robin scowls, in the danger zone.

“Absolutely,” Marion’s grin is feral, Robin’s scowl deepens as he comes to join them.

“What is that?” Marion gasps in horror at the boring grey brick Robin unwraps.

“An energy bar, it’s more effective than your trash,” Robin scoffs, tucking the wrapper away.

“What do ya mean,” Nightwing and Songbird mumble out through mouthfuls of baked goods.

Robin presumably rolls his eyes under the mask. Leaning in to take a bite of the energy bar. Marion slaps it out his hand.

“Hey!” Robin shouts, as it drops to the ground.

“It touched Gotham, it’s contaminated now,” Marion shrugs, giving Robin pause before he picks it back up.

“I am resistant to a few germs,” Robin says condescendingly, picking the bar back up.

“In Gotham ?” Marion stresses, making him pause again, looking consideringly at the before throwing it away.

He brings out another identical one. Marion doesn't even let him unwrap it before he makes a grab for it. Robin’s expecting it this time and jerks it out of his reach. However years with the miraculous has enhanced his reflexes, Marion’s other hand snatching it. With a little enhanced strength Marion throws it over the edge of the building into the street.

“So what I can’t eat?” Robin bites, hand moving towards his katana.

“Of course you can,” Marion holds out a macaron, “Here,”

“Absolutely not,” Robin glares, Nightwing leaning back to watch the exchange.

“It’s good,” Marion goads, shifting closer.

“I’ve had enough of Nightwing's overly sweet patrol snacks to know that is not true,” Robin scoffs, even as Marion moves close enough that he must be able to smell the treat.

“Yes but this is mine and I know for a fact it’s good enough for the gods,” Except for one particularly picky god who once made him attempt camembert macarons. Needless to say, no one else liked them.

“You overestimate yourself,” Robin scoffs, turning away from Marion, he’d bet to try and avoid the tantalising smell.

“Prove me wrong,” Marion challenges, and can tell from the shift in body language he had him.

With one last glare, Robin snatches the macaron. Regarding it skeptically.

“How do I know it’s not poisoned,”

“Oh for the love of-” Marion takes it back, breaking it in half rather than biting.

He hands one half back and eats the other. Robin doesn't take a bite before he stops chewing. Marion opens his mouth to show the mushed up food for good measure.

“Tt, disgusting,” Robin sneers, turning away to eat the last half, “... this is not,”

“Not what?” Marion teases, despite having a soft smile at Robin's expression, before it turns to a scowl.

“It is better than the trash Nightwing eats,” Robin concedes, too late, he had already given himself away.

“Hey!” Nightwing exclaims, but Marion moves quick as a cat to stuff a macaron in his left open mouth. He startles, before chewing, “... alright… never mind…. Wow,”

Marion hands Nightwing another before he has to ask, getting a downright envious look from Robin. With a smile Marion breaks another macaron in half, handing the bigger half to Robin. He takes it, biting it in half again, clearly trying to control his features to seem indifferent, and failing.

“It’s so good to see you actually enjoying something,” Nightwing pulls Robin into a hug, the latter scowling but not moving away. Marion grin widens, getting Robbin to narrow his eyes.

“What?” He demands, completely failing at being threatening while getting cuddled.

“Nothing,” Marion’s smile suggests otherwise, “Are you two brothers?”

The both startle at the question, shifting slightly away from each other. As if they were about to give away their identities.

“... yes,” Robin admits, faint blush would probably go unnoticed by someone without pseudo-night vision.

“Awe! Little D!” Nightwing brings him back into a much tighter hug, that Robin does try to get out of.

“Lets’ go,” Robin stands, blush probably visible even without night vision.

Marion grins, apparently teasing enough that Robin feels the need to defend himself. They argue and tease as they swing off into the night to resume patrol.

Marinette shifts, joints popping after being crouched for so long. Stake outs weren’t her typical affair as Ladybug but it seemed Sparrow will need to get used to them. She and Batman don’t talk, both focusing on the building below watching for activity. The silence makes the chatter on the comms all the more louder.

“We still need to decide on your codename,”

Marinette tries to hold back a laugh when Batman reaches up to turn off his comm faster than even she ever could as Ladybug. She follows suit, not wanting to burst out laughing when they were meant to be hidden. Marinette tries to stay focused on the warehouse in front of them but the architecture of nearby buildings has her itching to grab her sketchbook.

“Why did you ask me to join the stake out?” She asks Batman, before she gives into the urge to vent her designs.

“Do you honestly think he would sit still,” The avoidance of any codename doesn't go unnoticed by her.

“No he wouldn't,” She smiles, mischief dancing in her eyes, “You just didn’t want to put up with codename again did you?”

She only gets a grunt in response, making her smile widen. Before long she's bored again. That short exchange can only sustain her for so long, sitting still on a cold Gotham rooftop. This wasn’t what she wanted to do tonight, it was meant to be a way to release energy not gather it sitting still all day and night.  Marion was out in the city forgetting about his problems, letting them fall as he leapt from building to building. She was meant to be doing the same. In free fall, focusing on the next building to catch her rather than how to adjust to her new chaotic family.

“Who trained you?” Batman questions, halting Marinette's fidgeting, “Robin wouldn’t stop talking about it after your last patrol,”

That was strange. At the time he had seemed mad she took down all the gang members before he got the chance. Maybe that was just his default state.

“I was trained by master- my master I was trained by my master,” Marinette breaks herself out of her thoughts, stumbling over words.

“Was?” Batman prods, Now looking towards her, and thankfully ignoring her stuttering.

“Yeah, he… left about four years ago,” Marinette considers her words. It’s not that she didn’t trust Batman, but secret identities were so for a reason and any detail could reveal them to the worlds greatest detective.

“When did he start teaching you?” At least it didn’t seem like he was directly trying to figure out her identity, and it was nice to have a distraction. Even if it was just more talking, at least it was talking about something else.

“He never really taught us, per say, our city needed us so we stepped up,” After some hesitation on her part, but Marion had dragged her along anyway, not letting her give up for even a second, “He guided us from afar for a while until we needed to meet him,”

“You were protecting a whole city alone?” Batman's concern is not easily ignored.

“Not alone, we have each other,” Marinette corrects, plus sometimes other miraculous holders, but that would be giving away a bit too much, “We’re still protecting it, that's why we missed patrol, it’s not like we could have just quit, our home needs protection,”

It was partly true, they did leave to protect paris last time.

“.... It seems I’ve underestimated you,” Batman admits, glaring at the skyline “Clearly you are more…. Responsible than I assumed,”

You don’t know the half of it , Marinette thinks, smiling to herself. The silence they fall back into is a peaceful one. Marinette tries to ignore her thoughts, clearing her head to focus on the task at hand. She is just starting to master her thoughts when trucks pulls up, several people jumping out, working together to carry crates stacked in the trucks.

“I’ll call in the others,” Batman whispers, as more people come out to meet them, about thirty people so far with possibly more inside.

Marinette clicks her comm back on to hear the echo of Batman’s voice telling Marion's group to head their way. Within ten minutes Marion, Nightwing and Robin have joined them on the roof, studying the last of the crates being carried inside.

“We'll go in ahead, Sparrow you and your partner wait for my signal and be prepared as backup,” Batman instructs, preparing to jump across the street.

“Songbird,” Marion interrupts, Batman’s gaze snapping to him, “Decided on a codename,”

“That's… acceptable,” Batman concedes, Marion's grin growing manic.

Without another word the three bats swing across the street, crashing through the warehouse windows. She turns off the communicator so they can’t hear them but they can still hear Batman.

“I’m surprise you went with something- at least for you- normal,” Marinette doesn't take her eyes off the flashes of gunfire and shouting coming from inside, “I mean I know singing is your thing and everything, but still,”

“Dear Sister you underestimate me,” Marinette doesn't need to look at him to know what kind of face he’s making, “For you see I have a master plan, so grand it will make my name known to all,”

“And make Batman regret inviting us?” Marinette guesses, eyebrow raised.

“And make Batman regret inviting us,” Marion parrots, smile evident in his tone, “Do you have a speaker?”

Batman knocks the gun out of the nearest criminals hand. An uppercut sending them to the floor for a while. He’s right in the thick of the crowd, back to back with Nightwing, while Robin picks off those on the outer edges.

“I’m going to bring them in,” Batman alerts Nightwing, His communicator off so they don’t come in early.

“Are you sure they can handle this?” Nightwing hits his attacker over the head, disorientating them, “Red Robin will be here soon, there's no need to put rookie’s at risk,”

“They are very capable,” Batman defends in both senses, blocking the oncoming punch.

If Sparrow was telling the truth, which he was sure she was, they had single handedly been protecting an entire city for years. Even if it wasn’t as crime ridden as Gotham it was clear from what little they have said that there is something more going on, perhaps a few villains. What is worse is how young they are. Not even Robin, who has been training all his life, was allowed to patrol by himself. From the sounds of it they could have very well been protecting an entire city single handedly at his age. They could certainly handle a thirty something gang members.

“Sparrow, Songbird, now,” Batman flicks on his communicator, getting confirmation.

Not a hint of fear at the prospect of barging into a heavily armed base. They certainly didn’t seem cocky, confident yes, but they have the skill to back it up. Despite everything, they knew how to take the job seriously and are responsible enough to treat it with care and respect.

The sound of glass shattering is almost drowned out by the sudden blast of music. Eerily familiar tune to a pirate movie Dick had once insisted they all watch together.

“Captain Jack Sparrow is here!” Sparrow hits the ground, landing a punch on the way down.

“Yo-ho Yo-ho A pirate's life for me!” Songbird… sings… of course. As he swings into the room disappearing into a cluster of criminals, not that anyone could mistake where he was as he keeps singing at the top of his lungs. "We pillage we plunder we rifle and loot!"

Batman pauses to watch like many other criminals. "Drink up me 'earties, yo ho!"

Allies are standing, as confused as enemies at the strange scene. "We kidnap and ravage and don't give a hoot!"

Gunfire is drawn to Songbird, grinning ear to ear. "Drink up me 'earties, yo ho!"

Batman catches Sparrow's eye, getting a cheeky grin and saluting in response.

“Um…” Nightwing trails off, taking down a thug that had the wherewithal to attack them as most criminals head towards the new… disruption.

“No Nightwing, not now,” Batman grits out, Nightwing backs off to go help Songbird who was getting surrounded. And. Still. Singing.

Batman just stands in the middle of the remaining crowd surrounding him. Absentmindedly taking down anyone who attacks him. Gaze practically locked on the two.

This behaviour... is completely unbecoming of any hero or vigilante.

Sparrow takes down a criminal with a flip that immediately had Nightwing next to her. Chatting as they continued the fight, seemingly experimenting with different styles with the others instructions. With all the criminals around him down he slowly approaches the few remaining that surrounded Songbird and Robin. The latter of which was telling him to stop singing to no avail.

"Um... whats going on here?" Batman doesn't jump at the sudden appearance of Red Robin no matter how much it caught him off guard, he must be more distracted than he thought.

“Just like you to show up when all the hard work’s done,” Robin sneers over at Red Robin.

“I wasn't the one that called for backup,” Red Robin says cooly, “Couldn’t you handle a few thugs?”

“Of course I can your presence here is unwanted as always,” Robin snaps, even as Red Robin takes down the last remaining criminal.

“Oh you two are definitely brothers,” Songbird grins, cutting off Red Robin's retort.

“Tt You are completely- How do you even come to such a inane conclusion,” Robin surprisingly falters, Songbird grinning wider.

“So you’re not?” Songbird pesters, not waiting for further denial, “Cause you seem to really like each other,"

They both start arguing with Songbird. The latter just listening and adding provocation whenever necessary. Easing them both into a teasing atmosphere, playfully more than hurtfully sending out insults.

Nightwing was now showing Sparrow a particular kick flip. All the criminals around them wisely staying still if they were conscious. The two stop to laugh wherever the others say something particularly ludicrous.

Batman watches them, training his years of discipline to keep a smile from tugging on his lips.

I suppose it can be a good thing.

------------------------------------

Taglist:

@technicallyburninggarden @fusser90  @misslenamooney @superbwhispersconnoisseur @biodad-bruce-month

[thatpinkbetch]

Bkdk Fic Rec

I’ve been inspired to write a fic rec! This one goes out to you @lonely-rabbit

At like, the end of 2018 and the beginning of 2019 I stayed up until 4am every night reading fics, and because I’m such a loser, I made a word doc to keep track of all of them so I wouldn’t forget them.... I tried organizing it by length but it got messy cause I’m ridiculous and cluttered, so sorry! (I’ll save my own for the end alskdjflsdkfj gotta self promote you know). This is going to get...really long, so I’ll put it under a read more! Also, just a heads up, these are all on ao3, in case that’s important to anyone!

Disclaimer: Any fics with mature or explicit content I will add a bolded warning for, even if it’s only a little bit. Normally most fics will be tagged as such, but some fics that are rated as teen I’ve found to be more suggestive than some of those rated as mature, so I will try to point it out where it feels necessary, for anyone who wishes to avoid it.

Fics under 1k:

Illuminate by TheQueen (269 words)

Summary: Bakugou watches the first firework launch and fights to keep his face neutral

Very short, plot is about a case of amnesia, also very cute and well written for that length! Not angsty at all imo

sweaty hands holding secrets - shounentwink (563 words)

Summary: Someone said Midoriya holds secrets in his hair.

It’s not true: He holds it tightly in his hands. Bakugou’s seen it.

I really like this writer! You’ll see quite a bit of them in this post alkdsjfalskdjf

Fics 1k - 10k:

Many sunflowers later - Jeka (2395 words)

Summary: Scholar Midoriya Izuku comes back to the person he left behind after his journey through the kingdom, the mighty dragon clan leader Bakugou Katsuki.

Day 1 of Twin Stars Week 2020: Fantasy AU.

First of all, fantasy au!!! Second of all, jeka!!! (I need to read more of your stuff!!) Anyways, so cute, such lovely, pretty writing, wonderful story telling, and they’re so in love TT_TT

Boom Badoom Boom - warschach (3429 words)

Summary: Izuku's working the kissing booth at the school fair, it just so happens Katsuki has been crushing on him since the first grade.

“Did you—“ Izuku parted his mouth with no sound leaving it, “Did you pay?”

“Yea.”

“For a kiss?”

This one’s a little silly but I love it still. It’s got a “kids in the 80′s over summer vacation” vibe, I think. I love warschach! I should read more of their writing... They have SUCH good bakudeku content! *It’s rated teen but there’s some suggestive content, just a heads up!

Hopeless Ramen-tic - lalazee (7155 words)

Summary:  Midoriya is a cute guy who works at a ramen stall and Bakugou is thirsty as hell, but has to hide it by being an asshat. Another love story.

Ah, so good TT_TT so much sass, such good plot development and story telling for a simple concept *It’s rated as teen but again, it can be suggestive at times!

I’ll share this with you, so leave it behind - yabakuboi (3508 words)

Suammry: For the sake of the story, All Might is never in need of a successor, and, when Izuku saves Katsuki from the sludge monster, encourages young Midoriya down a different path. Thus, Katsuki and Izuku part ways after junior high, as Katsuki enters U.A. and the Midoriyas move overseas. It’s later that Katsuki realizes that there’s something missing, that he drove that something away.

Years after, Katsuki finds him in the last place he looks, in the cereal aisle at the local grocery store of their childhood neighborhood.

So soft, so sweet, so good if you just want to curl up in a comfy blanket and drink hot cocoa and feel warm and cozy and a little in love

The Secret Deku Box - yabakuboi (2241 words)

Summary: “Y’know, Bakugou never, ever talks about girls,” Kaminari says, his voice thoughtful.

“And I wonder why that is.” Ashido rolls her eyes.

“I’m just curious!” Kaminari whines. Kirishima drags the box out, unlabeled and unassuming, the lid not even fully clasped over the edges. “The guy has to— Whoa, what’s that?”

Kirishima realizes a little belatedly that this is a serious breach of privacy, and Bakugou will actually murder all of them. “Nothing!” he cries, attempting to shove it back under the bed, but Ashido snatches it away.

“Please be his porn stash!” Kaminari whispers as she whips the lid off.

Cute, funny, in canon, in character, and a must read I would say! 

daisy bunches and heather branches - halcyonwhispers (5862 words)

Summary:  izuku falls in love with the foul-mouthed tattoo artist next door.

Not another flower/tattoo shop au.... aldskjflaskdjfd Okay but punk!Bakugou is ALWAYS a smart move imo

the best part of me (is the worst I can give) - halcyonwhispers (5668)

Summary: Whole sentences usually make up people’s Words, but Katsuki got stuck with a name instead.

Izuku’s name.

I am such a sucker for soulmate aus when it comes to these boys TT_TT *There is some mature content, just a heads up!

Hard to Say - halcyonwhispers (8390 words)

Summary: Izuku is a Halfling, born after his faerie father spirited away his mom and then left her behind. Never quite fitting in with the humans or any of the supernatural beings in his small town, Izuku hoped that going to a diverse college in the big city will help him finally make friends.

Katsuki’s family has been powerful witches for generations, and he’s no different. Talented and a proclaimed genius to boot, he knew he shouldn’t waste his time on this dumbass (disgustingly cute) half-blood.

Or,

two idiots fall in love and don’t get that the other’s awkward cues are just a result of romantic tension.

I am ALSO a sucker for fantasy/mythical creatures au and I LOVED this one - Bakugou absolutely unable to handle how cute Midoriya is? Perfection - but it’s unfinished, and I don’t think it ever will be continued, unfortunately TT_TT

lots to unpack (throw away the whole suitcase) - shounentwink (4315 words)

Summary: “How’d you know?” Midoriya asks.

There’s a hunch to his shoulders that wasn’t there three hours ago. Freckled shoulders are kissed sunburnt and red: he looks like someone ran him over and left him like roadkill in the sunlight. Bakugou’s working with insurance today, but he could see the sparks of green lightning even from his elevated position in their shared agency. Midoriya’s holding his thumb, cracking it over and over — it looks like he’s rubbed it raw.

“Dunno,” Bakugou says. “Maybe you’re just easy to read, nerd.”

I love this one so much, it was one of the first ones I read, it’s so good, and it’s another that really affected how I view their relationship! Idk this one just hit for me

hang the moon from us (it’s a no from me) - shounentwink (1200 words)

Summary: Midoriya’s gonna get sick of Bakugou one of these days, and then the whole ruse will be over, and the balance of power will tilt beyond salvation, but that day isn’t today and it looks like Bakugou knows it.

What an asshole.

Once again, I’m a sucker for the fantasy au... But even more, the diction, the details, the imagery...it’s absolutely all stunning here. I wish I could write this pretty

In Which Bakugou Finds His One Tru Luv - Erina (5862 words) This is the first one of a series called The Misadventures of Explodo-kill Agency!

Summary:  Welcome to the Explodo-kill agency! We can destroy your buildings, crash your cars, and help you solve one of the seven mysteries in life: who is Bakugou Katsuki's mysterious boyfriend?!

I’ll admit I’ve only read the first three but by god they are the funniest fics I’ve ever read in my life. I see that Erina has added more since the last time I checked it out! Tbh I was only interested in reading the purely bakudeku ones... (My favorite was the second one!! SO funny and cute!)

i still do - raeryn (9646 words)

Summary:  He’s losing him to pieces, but Izuku still tries to make them count. In which a battle leaves Bakugou Katsuki with amnesia, and Izuku finds himself picking up the pieces.

So, this one makes me cry. TT_TT

One Thing Straight - winningshot (9899 words)

Summary: They totally aren't.

Hints of their relationship is found in all of their friends’ social media accounts, but majority of their fans still think that Katsuki and Izuku are in relationships with anybody but each other.

It was amusing up until it became sad.

Lmao it’s a little salty but I guess I can be too. This is a social media fic! There’s multiple ships in this one, too

A Demolition Boy & his Cryptid BF - kewltie (8472 words)

Summary: Bakugou of the Demolition Squad is famous for running one of the most popular Youtube channels on the web that regularly blow shit up and jumped off a perfectly good building for shit and giggles. He's also famous for his Cryptid BF™, never appearing on camera except for a few bodyshots and all information on him is kept locked up tighter than Fort Knox, therefore drawing all sort of attention and curiosity toward his mysterious boyfriend.

Deku from Deku Explains is a hopeless chatterbox who is known for uploading 20-30 minutes video that talked about his favorite shows and comics and have one of the most devoted following on Youtube. He also can't seem to shut up about his boyfriend Kacchan, who regularly make his presence on the channel as a disembodied voice.

They should theoretically have nothing in common except a shared platform to host their content and an army of fans with an endless curiosity and devotion to their Youtubers. Vidcon is where we lay our scene and the internet is about to get a rude wake up call.

Okay kewltie is SO GOOD and very creative! The formatting is phenomenal, it’s like you’re actually experiencing a social media melt down in real time lol

be my good luck charm - writedeku (6785 words)

Summary: See, the thing is, Midoriya Izuku had been born with a curse. It’s not a curse that’s particularly visible. He doesn’t have horns, or a tortured face, and it’s not the kind of silly curse like a friend of his had way down south in Diagnor, wherein the girl had been born without the ability to say the word duck. Midoriya Izuku is just extremely unlucky.

(Or the AU in which Izuku's the world's unluckiest travelling merchant, and Katsuki is someone who may be able to help him. For a price, that is.)

Oh I adore this one! It’s so cute and such a good narrative! Nice and warm, and Bakugou trying his damnedest to be suave, and it somehow working because Midoriya is just as flustered. *Another one rated as teen but some suggestive content.

Smells Like Victory - majjale (2377 words)

Summary: Bakugou takes two steps into the room and stops, clapping a hand over his nose. “Ugh, what stinks like Deku in here?”

"Good afternoon, Bakugou. That would be the amortentia."

I must admit, not a fan of HP, but majjale...TT_TT majjale writes these two boys so well. This one is really, really good!

Cherish Me - Justaperson1718 (2376 words)

Summary: “What?”

Izuku looked back down at his menu and flipped the page, a small smile on his face. “Nothing.”

Katsuki glared at Izuku from across the table. “If it was nothing then you wouldn’t be staring at me.”

“It’s just a little funny watching you try to look your best for our date when you always look great anyway,” Izuku explained. He wouldn’t look up from his menu while he spoke, but his words remained ingrained with confidence nevertheless. He considered what he was saying to be fact, and nothing else. “Even when you’re not trying in front of the cameras, it’s still hard to take my eyes off of you.”

This is a sequel to a fic that’ll be in the next section, because it’s longer, called Manage Me. Please read that one first before this one! (Not part of a series, but they’re the same story line)

Fascinating - Justaperson1718 (1556 words)

Summary: “I’m not staring at you,” Izuku replied, his eyes focused intently on Katsuki. He’s still wearing his pajamas, sitting on his knees in their shared bed. He was awake moments before Katsuki, and waited eagerly for the other to awake.

Katsuki glanced over his shoulder after his shirt was on and glared. “You’re fucking staring at me right now.”

Izuku shook his head, humming his disapproval quietly. “I’m watching you.”

“That’s the same damn thing,” Katsuki said while searching for a pair of pants in the dresser. “Your eyes are fixated on me like I’m your life’s fucking goal or some shit.”

“I just like watching you get dressed.” Izuku tilted his head to the side and smiled softly at Katsuki’s confused stare. “I know, it’s weird. But I like it.”

*There is a little bit of implied mature content, but overall, it’s just so sweet and intimate, and I just simply adore this one.

in a place once filled with gold - dorenamryn (9226 words)

Summary: It felt strange to remember such details, for they were things a friend should know, and as far as Katsuki was concerned, he and Deku hadn’t been friends in a very, very long time. He could admit, with reluctance, that they were on the path there, now, even though they would never make it. Katsuki would die before they could get the chance.

or: There is a garden growing in Katsuki’s lungs, and he is helpless to stop it.

“Hanahaki disease” okay, I can explain myself. Okay, I can’t. In any case, you got angst with a happy ending if that’s what you’re into!

Kaleidoscope - DPRenFTW (5141 words)

Summary: Izuku is a witch. He just needs to find his familiar. Enter a boy that is a wolf, and a wolf that is a boy - with wild red eyes and sharp smiles.

And Izuku thinks:

"Oh, it's him."

Just as beautiful and fascinating as the name implies! I seriously recommend for the beautiful writing, the gorgeous world, the mythical creatures au, and the lovely bakudeku romance!

Learning Curve - sensiblysilly (4222 words)

Summary: Deku and Katsuki’s first kiss goes rather differently than planned.

And Katsuki’s quickly learning that relationships can be unpredictable - especially when taking into account the variable that is Midoriya Izuku.

This really is just a careful handling of a teenage romance where perhaps one of them may have shit they’re still working through. It’s really sweet, and a careful study at boundaries and the building of a relationship. I actually stumbled across this while looking for another with the same name and ended up pleasantly surprised. Kacchan can has a little validation, as a treat.

4/20 is a national holiday - Ereri_Garbage (

Summary: Izuku is a drug dealer that doesn't really accept the fact he's a drug dealer, Katsuki is hot as hell as shouldn't be allowed a facebook.

Happy (Late) birthday Katsuki and happy (late) 4/20. I actually half assed an edit on this one so it took longer to post than I thought it would.

Uummmm lmao yes I have a sense of humor. ;ALDSKJFLSKDJF Okay, I say that, but this is not a crack fic, it’s a good story that I enjoy with good writing, and *it has mature, content, obviously for multiple reasons here. It’s rated as mature but there are borderline explicit moments imo. It’s a fun fic and funny, too! And, ngl, it really does remind me of college... But forget about me, the bakudeku is wonderful too of course :)

Drinking Watermelon - warschach (8906 words)

Summary: For whatever reason, maybe divine fate, Izuku turned and looked over his shoulder and waved to them.

Katsuki’s heart full on stopped right then, and his fingers forgot their duty on the rails, and his body neglected its job to keep Katsuki balanced.

Izuku’s summer sweet smile fell into concern as Katsuki went airborne and cracked his skull on the porch.

or Katsuki works as a camp counselor, and Izuku is a boy made of summer heat and sunlight.

Love it when people have Bakugou as absolutely enamored with Midoriya; it’s so good and true. Anyways this one makes me like summer camp story lines. It’s funny and also cute and great writing! *It’s got explicit content, just a heads up. Warschach stories just have this youthful 80′s vibe, I don’t know how else to explain it.

there are listed buildings - semiautomatichearts (3309)

Summary: Katsuki first sees colors bloom when he is only three years old. It is timid Izuku, hiding behind the cover of his mother's leg who looks upon him with wide eyes, and Katsuki's world explodes in shades of greens and pinks and blues, and he is so startled, he begins to cry.

His life is then on defined in color, in shades his peers can't see, by the forlorn, timid stare in Izuku's eyes that always lets off more than he is willing to tell. There is a schism driven between himself and his fated other, and Katsuki strives to be better than fate, better than what is defined for him. He is more than the written pages of a book, to be cracked open and read by the gods.

He wonders if it is possible for colors to bloom for someone who will never love you back.

Ah...soulmates :) So interesting how bakudeku fits into soulmate aus like this one when they’ve known each other as kids! And when they’ve had this complex push and pull thing going on all their lives! The writing is beautiful, and so is the story!

Promise Ring - bkdkwritingsdump (3579)

Summary:  The midwest in the 1950′s is no place for boys who like kissing boys: something Izuku and Katsuki know all too well growing up there. However, the undeniable bond between the nervous science geek and the aloof delinquent will still find a way to blossom in such a desert.

Cute, sweet, makes my gay heart ache. Longing not just for the one you love, but just to feel right loving them. Very pretty story line, lovely story telling!

Fics 10k - 30k:

Fishy - warschach (19417 words)

Summary: Izuku’s convinced his hot co-worker/neighbor, Katsuki, is a mermaid-or merman- you gotta consider genders even with mythical creatures- and plans to prove it.

(or this is kinda like the show ‘Monster Quest’, except Izuku actually finds said monster, falls in love, and have sexy times.)

Another warschach! I love this one, I love how they write bakudeku, particularly as college students, their stories (at least, the ones that I’ve read) always feel so warm, like a summer’s day, but not a lazy one, one that’s playful? If that makes sense? *This one is explicit, another heads up!

Manage Me - Justaperson1718 (10756 words)

Summary: Izuku caught himself moving forward, his head tilted somewhat to the side, and his eyes shot wide open. His gaze met Katsuki’s half-lidded eyes now that he was no longer in a dreamlike state, and seeing the way Katsuki was looking at him—waiting for him—made him realize Katsuki would’ve let him do it. He might have even wanted him to do it.

“You’re both doing fabulous!” the photographer called out to them, packing his camera into his bag and getting ready to leave. “I just got word that what we have now should be good, so we’ll stop there. Thank you for your time! Lock the door on your way out after you change.”

The pair stayed frozen in place, with Izuku’s arms around Katsuki’s neck and Katsuki’s hands resting on Izuku’s waist, while the photographer and his supervisor left.

“Kacchan,” Izuku cooed once they were gone. “Did you want to…?”

Love the story, love the bakudeku! Very, very good bakudeku TT_TT very sweet *There is some mature content in here as well

point to a map (we’ve been there) - cosmicfuss (10589 words)

Summary: Serendipity / sĕr″ən-dĭp′ĭ-tē Serendipity is the occurrence of an unplanned fortunate discovery. Two men find themselves on a subway, hot coffee on one while the other is in the middle of a screaming match. After that they can't seem to stop finding each other, no matter how far they go.

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again; this fic owns my entire soul. I love the story, the ease of their relationship, just how lovely they are together. It’s another kind of nice, fluffy fic you’d read on a bad day where you come home and curl up in a blanket and listen to a ten hour video of thunderstorm white noise. *Again, some more mature content in here

Partners - tsukithewolf (13619 words) Another series! Two parts to this one this time

Summary: It is said that in Musutafu there is a charm that one can buy at a temple that will lead you to your destined partner. They say that if the charm works, you would be able to follow the red string of fate to the person you were meant to be with. And if the person returns your feelings, they would be able to see the string as well, proving that both were meant to be.

Three-year-old Katsuki and Izuku misunderstand what the word "partner" means and discover the charm and the rumor behind it is not only true, but more than expected.

Gets a little heavy, depression, bullying, suicidal thoughts, etc. But it must get worse before it gets better, that kind of thing. I also just adore the second part (called Bond) - maybe because it’s much fluffier, what about it?

Learning Curve - iknewaman (10304 words)

Summary: “Izuku.” Uraraka repeats as she motions at the person stood next to her. Green curls, average height, and, well. Up close, not such a bad smile. Uraraka points a thumb at Bakugou and enunciates slowly, “This is Bakugou. He can speak sign language too.”

Wait. Sign language?

The stranger— well, Izuku— looks at him with a raised brow. Their free hand lifts up as they make a slight motion of the hand.‘

Really?’

*

Bored out of his mind at a house party one night Bakugou is introduced to Izuku, a deaf student who offers to help teach Bakugou sign language in exchange for a favour-- or well, is prompted into asking for a favour.

Ah, I really want to explain this one a little bit? I’d never been into fanfiction ever, only really getting into it with these boys. This was the second one I read, I remember, and it caught me off guard, and it intrigued me. It really surprised me as to what fanfiction could be. Ngl I had biased perceptions of fanfics - I used to be one of those people who thought fanfiction could never be good writing - and this one slapped me in the face with it’s subtle beauty and creative story and heart melting capabilities, and very, very real relationship and growth. Anyways it’s so cute how happy Deku is to teach Kacchan sign language TT_TT Make sure to read the tags!

The Keeper and the Sun God’s Heir - SurelyHeavenWaits (12746 words)

Summary:  The Titans' have stolen something important from Izuku, heir of the Sun God, and he wants it back.

This one, this one, this one, this one, this one, this one, this one, this one this one- Oh my god this one. Okay so what, I was a Percy Jackson kid, what about it? I love the mythical aus, particularly the god ones. But beyond that, the writing is so beautiful, just like the world, and the imagery. The bakudeku...absolutely stunning. The story itself? Incredible. Cannot recommend more. *There is explicit content in this, though I will say, it’s all in the last chapter, and all of the story is in the first two chapters. There’s also a second part as it’s a series and it’s short but it’s cute and sweet TT_TT

seven days - aaAAAaaahhhhHHHHH (10094 words)

Summary: There’s something about the green haired boy, an aura that just drew Katsuki in before he even knew his name.

[Sometimes your mind forgets, but your heart remembers]

Heed my warning: DON’T read this in front of other people. I bawl every time I read this one TT_TT I know I said I don’t like angst but AJLSKDFJALSKDFJ it has a hopeful ending! I mean yeah you’re gonna cry but...hope? :’) (that username really says it all tbh)

Fics 30k+

Notice me, nerd - useless_donut (40000 words)

Summary: Bakugou is in love with Midoriya. He doesn’t hide it, in fact it’s so painfully obvious that the entire class of 3-A has him figured out in a matter of months (days, in some cases). Too bad Midoriya is the most oblivious motherfucker out there, and Bakugou is too damn stubborn to actually ask him out.

Will the class of 3-A survive the sexual tension? Who will snap first? Someone put Bakugou out of his misery, please, before everyone else dies of second-hand embarrassment.

(a love story as witnessed by the class of 3-A)

Love the idea of Bakugou being brazen and brash, cause yeah, he is. So fucking funny though how that translates to him flirting. Gotta say, thought I was gonna cringe, but his “I’m gay af” outfit really ended up being A Look. Love the mutual pining, it really is strong in this one. *Okay, mature content in this one lads.

While You Were Sleeping - Belkacaramelka (71197 words)

Summary: The one where quirkless fanboy Midoriya Izuku rescues Pro Hero Todoroki Shouto, gets mistaken as his fiancé while he is in a coma, and gets caught up in the most unlikely fake engagement... until his childhood enemy and Todoroki's classmate Bakugou Katsuki tries to catch him out, and they both end up discovering a lot more about each other than they'd expected.

Quirkless AU based on the film; endgame BakuDeku. -- Katsuki didn’t know when the change had happened: how he had gone from asking why Todoroki chose Deku of all people, to wondering why it was Todoroki that Deku chose. Troublesome Deku, who cooed like an idiot at cats, tripped at a random catcall and sang badly. Who, despite everything, proved that it wasn’t the quirk that defined a person. Deku, who was too much, not his, and undeniably off limits to begin with.

Update: Epilogue added

*This one has mature content. If you can, please, for the love of god, read this fic. It’s like, tied with my favorite bkdk fic perhaps ever. It’s based on the movie of the same title, a nineties romcom with Sandra Bullock, but Belkacaramelka has so effortlessly made it into it’s own story, fit it so perfectly inside of the bnha world. I definitely stayed up until 6:30am reading this one. It’s got such good badass Midoriya, who is also sweet, and really really good reconciliation between bakudeku.

All Gifted - fitzefitcher (39129 words)

Summary: The thing about gifts is that they're meant to be given, they're meant to be shared; so Izuku will take his gifts, so freely given to him, and share them with all he holds dear.

Izuku is born without any gifts, as his kind often are, to a witch mother and salamander father, on one sweltering night in July.

This one is unfinished...and I highly doubt it will ever be. But what has been written is incredible. Once again, I’m a sucker for the magic/mythical creatures aus. But the relationship is great! The characterization is great! The found family trope that was building up is great!

under a hollow sun - umbrage (40572 words)

Summary: Midoriya is cursed with emptiness.

Misfortune leads him to a man of ancient magic and endless rage.

To stop an unfathomable evil, their mismatched halves must become whole.

Uuuggghhhh this was so good! I don’t think it’s going to be finished either :( Once again, fantasy au, more amazing writing, on point characterization, incredible pacing, makes you hungry for more story.

all the savage soul requires - majjale (58032 words)

Summary: Bakugou seems to have exhausted his patience for words and no longer acknowledges that Midoriya exists, so Midoriya crosses his legs, stares down at his hands limned in firelight, and makes a list of things he knows.

One. His name is Midoriya Izuku.

Two. He is a Godmarked, future god of life, heir to the divine throne.

Three. The gods have been fighting Death for eons, and now he's coming for recompense with everything he’s got.

This is majjale, so of course, the writing is more than beautiful; it’s absolutely breathtaking. This may be my favorite fic ever - unfortunately I don’t think it will ever be finished either TT_TT There’s the gods/fantasy au, which you know by now I love. But the characterization of our two boys is absolutely perfect, and I mean that as literally as possible. And the story being crafted between the two, the memory loss, the obvious history muddled by it all, it was so dense, and the PINING, so incredibly written, flowing so naturally. It wasn’t even close to being done, but it was wonderful, still is wonderful. 

My Writing: (You can skip this if you hate shameless self promotion)

You’re too damn flicking cute (1815 words)

Summary:  Bakugou is certain his shitty boyfriend is instigating kisses. Maybe it doesn't help that he keeps giving them away like it's a damn going out of business sale, but the stupid nerd is too fucking cute. Either way, like everything else, this is a competition, and he's going to win it.

Please don’t read this unless you’re going to the dentist afterwards! I’ve been told it’s so sweet it’ll give you instant cavities >_>;;;;

Bakugou Katsuki, you smooth motherfucker (10118 words)

Summary: Everyone around him knows that Bakugou Katsuki has a very special way with words. To the untrained ear he is loud and crass; to those that speak Kacchan, he is caring and inspiring. Yet there are rare moments, moments so fleeting you blink and you miss them, where Bakugou’s words pierce straight through Midoriya’s chest, and surprise everyone around him.

Goddammit, if only he would say them to Midoriya’s face.

Or, the five times Bakugou said something nice about Midoriya, and the one time he said something kind to him (but that was too long of a title).

I think most would consider this my best published fic; it’s one of those snapshot fics, “the five times where x did this, and the one time where they didn’t.” The recurring comment I get on this one is both of them being super in character, so I think that’s it’s defining characteristic! Bakugou and Midoriya have never known a life without the other, and in a perfect world, they never will.

Here, let me fix that (11247 words)

Summary: Bakugou honestly never thought he’d see Deku ever again. And now that they were together in this tiny compartment, alone for the next two and a half minutes, he had no clue what to say. He’d just apologized, right? So perhaps he could leave it at that and carry on with the original plan to never see the green-haired man that reminded him of dense forests, late night adventures, and tear-stained faces, ever again.

Ha! Who is he kidding? These bitches are soulmates.

I’ve gotten some critiques on this one, so sorry in advance if it’s not to your liking! Basically, what if Midoriya never got his quirk? Obviously, life would find a way to put them together because, as previously stated, these bitches are soulmates.

Plenty of Time (16654 words)

Summary: Bakugou found what little sleep he got restless and filled with nightmares that he forgot the second he opened his eyes. Tonight was the first time in a long time where he just had a normal dream - and it happened to be about Deku.

How fucking typical.

In other words, two dorks realize they have feelings for each other but don't know what to do about said feelings.

Ah, my first fic. Very simple, boys being boys, kinda like a slow burn? Idk how to explain this one, just boys figuring out their feelings and trying to figure out what to do about them. Been told these two are a little stupid but I think that’s valid.

We’re all time bombs waiting to explode (39223 words)

Summary: We have now entered the slipstream of time, into an alternate dimension where it neither is, nor isn’t, the 80’s. Two teenagers, burdened with the weight of adolescence in the modern world, find themselves struggling side by side, in part because of each other.

Bakugou, the most popular boy in school, has everything he could possibly want; status, power, and an unbreakable will. Having been dragged along behind him all the way to the top, Midoriya can’t help but wonder how (and why) he ended up standing beside his childhood friend-turned bully-turned friend again, weighed down by their complicated past and present. As the tension between them grows every day, and the arrival of a new, pretty face causes it to peak, it won’t be long before something - or someone - snaps.

I am...very bad at titles, and summaries apparently. This was my Heathers au, but it very quickly diverges from the original (I don’t do sad endings....) *This one has mature content, including implied sexual activity, drug use, and underage drinking, along with other heavy topics; please read the tags! Though tbh Midoriya is 17 for a couple weeks before it hits his birthday halfway through, so keep that in mind I guess? I kind of went heavy with this one, but I think the pay off was immense. This is the one with the most amount of comments stating it’s their favorite bkdk fic ever (and I cry). It’s a rough start, with a rough journey, but so is bakudeku! There’s a lot of petty drama, and then all of a sudden it’s Not That Petty and very much Far Too Real. Many have cried reading the ending, I cried writing it. My sister says it’s her favorite of mine. Now, I did kind of push this out without polishing it so much because I was losing my willpower, so if it feels lacking, that’s one hundred percent my fault.

Okay that was a lot! It took me a couple days...I hope I wasn’t too annoying with all my opinions! Please have a nice day. and enjoy some good reads, even if they aren’t the ones in this post!

[petergrantkavinsky]

RED QUEEN Spoiler Chat with Victoria Aveyard on Instagram (04/17/2020)

Q: Who’s the inspiration for Mare? VA: The RED QUEEN series is written in first person point of view, which means you’re in the character’s head. The majority of it is written in Mare’s perspectives. The inspiration for her - because so much of the books was her and so much of it was me - naturally, there were things in there and character moments that came from my personality. She also has a lot of things I wish I was and also things I’m glad that I’m not. I think that we as writers get to explore being other people the way that we write. Another character that had a lot of me in him was Julian. Julian was probably the closest to my personality. Maybe a little of Evangeline if I didn’t have the rules of society.

Q: Why did Shade have to die? VA: I firmly believe that character deaths have to mean something, and you have to feel something because if you get to the point where you’re desensitized, you’ve lost the audience and there’s no point in what’s going on. I knew [Shade] had to be removed from the narrative because he made things too easy for Mare both emotionally and physically. It’s very hard to write any kind of set piece or action sequence around someone who can teleport. I had to find really creative ways to knock him out every single time. But mentally he was such a crutch for Mare. When you’re writing, there’s supposed to be many obstacles for your characters, you’re supposed to make things as difficult as possible. That’s when they really start to shine, when shit hits the fan. So I knew he would be removed, and I knew removing him would be a major turning point in [Mare’s] character.

Q: Maven broke my heart a lot of points in the book. VA: Yeah... Yeah.

Q: Did you ever consider to have Maven’s “good side” back? VA: It’s interesting because I don’t see him having good side and bad side. I don’t see a firm delineation in his brain. It’s not like he was switching between people, it was all one. And I think that’s how most people are. We all have different sides of ourselves, but they all conglomerate into one person. I never really considered an about-face for him. I didn’t think it would be realistic to his character, to the world, to the path that he’d set himself on. I think he was really really dedicated to the idea “what if everything I’ve done has been in vain?,” and he almost wanted to make the bad things he’s done worth it, so that in his mind they balance out and there was never any way to square that. I do think - in this part of my dedication to writing real characters and writing people - I think that Mare and Cal maybe made a mistake or maybe wrote him off a little too fast? I really wanted to include that confusion and that sort of moment at the end where Mare is thinking “did we make the right choice?” You’re never really gonna know because that’s how life is, you wonder about choices you made, and you never know.

Q: What was the song Mare and Cal were listening to when they were dancing in the moonlight? VA: It was COME ON EILEEN. In the very first draft of RED QUEEN, there were so many more references to modern-day life. There was a dialogue where Mare said “we’re dancing to this song about someone named Eileen,” which honestly in hindsight wouldn’t make sense because language had changed by that time. Our English today would have been similar with what Old English is to us now in that it would be very very difficult to understand.

Q: If you could revive any character in the series, who would it be? VA: That’s a hard one. It almost makes me feel good about who I lost because I can’t immediately answer “oh, I want this character back.” I think it would probably be Shade. I feel bad for him, the hole he left behind. And it was so fun. I guess?

Q: How far in the future is RED QUEEN set? VA: Post-post-apocalyptic setting. The world has fallen apart and put itself back together. More information about that in BROKEN THRONE.

Q: How did you start writing the series? Where did the thoughts and idea start? VA: I remember I was sitting at the desk and I had this image of a girl in the arena about to be executed, and instead of dying, she electrocutes her executioner and kills them. I was like “what is this?” I remember I wrote a little snippet of it down and e-mailed it to myself, and RED QUEEN sort of built from there. The questions I asked myself, “who is she?,” “why was she going to be killed?,” “what kind of world exists for her to have this superpower?” That helped me build the story and find what sort of facet I wanted to tell and how.

Q: Were you inspired by House Lannister to make House Samos? VA: Not directly, but GAME OF THRONES inspired so much of the RED QUEEN novels. I would say the biggest inspiration I took from GAME OF THRONES - A SONG OF ICE AND FIRE - was the way that the books are structured and written. The chapter endings are almost always an insane twist. I got to the point when I was reading those books and I was covering the end of the chapter because I knew my eye was going to drift, and I would look to the side and “oh, this character just got their throat slit. Great.” I wanted to write that way, so a lot of the chapter endings in RED QUEEN and all of the endings of the books have this twist. It’s one of my tricks for getting you guys to keep reading.

Q: Do Mare and Cal get back together? VA: Well, I don’t know, maybe we’ll find out in BROKEN THRONE, who knows? But I was really really proud to get to that ending and have my characters in a place where they know they need to heal and maybe sort of find themselves again. You can’t necessarily do that with another person - some people do - I just don’t think they could. And they’re so young. I’m so happy with many different endings, but to me it didn’t feel true to sort of bookend a life that young. I think it gives the world more reality if you feel there’s more to come and there’s more going on as opposed to the door has shut, the book has closed.

Q: Which power would you like to have? VA: My favorite superpower is not in the books. It was in the first draft of RED QUEEN, but wisely my agent was like “everything up to this point was great. You’ve got to take this out.” It was time travel, and I’m so glad she told me that. But I would love to be a time traveler. I just want to check out what’s going on back in the day.

Q: Did you cry writing a scene? VA: I’m not a cryer while writing. Some authors are, some authors aren’t.

Q: Did you ever give up while writing RED QUEEN? VA: Yes. I distinctly distinctly remember this. I was about three months into writing the draft. I was halfway through, and I thought this was garbage. I remember I reread CATCHING FIRE, the second HUNGER GAMES book. That sort of gave me this motivation to refill the well essentially, and I wanted to write again. But that wasn’t enough. The thing that really pushed me over the top was both my dad and my best friend who were reading the book as I was writing the chapters. I slowed down so much that both of them were like “can you just tell me how it ends because i really wanna know if you’re not gonna finish it?” And I was like fine, okay, I will write this book. And I did. It just came down to that moment of decision to push through. I work best when I’m under pressure. I was really really under pressure then, my back was so against the wall in terms of career. Looking back, I see what a precarious position I was in. I’m really glad I didn’t realize it at that time, but I’m very glad I pushed through on that.

Q: Was there a different ending to WAR STORM? VA: No. I knew the emotional ending I wanted for RED QUEEN when I wrote the first book. I knew I wanted to end this with the main character and the love interest not together. I knew I wanted to have that reality of too much has happened, we’ve been broken, and we need to heal on our own. That was the message I really wanted to send. In GLASS SWORD, I figured out the plot ending and where it was going to go, and it never changed from there. I’m so happy that my editing team didn’t push back on that, my agent never pushed back on that. Everyone was go for it. I got really lucky.

Q: How did you come up with the names for the characters? VA: A lot of them just popped into my head for the most part. Cal was the only one that was really constructed. I knew I wanted him to have a cool nickname but a really good-feel royal full name, so Tiberias Calore. Calore means heat. And I shortened his last name into Cal.

Q: Maven and Thomas? VA: As of now, no plans to return to that story, short story or a novel of its own. But it was a relationship I was really keen to focus on and show how much that colored Maven and his relationship with his mother. His mom is such an interesting character because she does love her son, and so many things she did to him, she did out of love, like trying to take away pain from him by messing with his brain. It had a lot of repercussions later on, but Thomas was definitely the first thing that was so painful, and he went to his mother and said “take this from me.” I think that was really a slippery slope.

Q: Tyton was good character. VA: Thank you! I liked him too. I really loved the electricons getting sort of a little squad going. That moment where Mare realizes she’s not alone. She’d been kidnapped at that point, and people are coming for her, but she’s not alone in what she is. Up to that point while learning “oh, I’m not the only Red who has powers,” she was the only Red with her power, and finally people who deeply understood what was going on...it felt like giving her a hug.

Q: How many times did you think of Maven’s ending? Were you sad to write him the way you knew you had to? VA: I don’t have those emotional downturns with work. There are definitely scenes where I’m so excited because I cannot wait for someone to read this. His twist in RED QUEEN when he reveals where his true alliances lie, that was one of the things I was so excited to get in front of people and to experience with you. But no, I don’t think I was sad. Does that make me a bad person?

Q: Do you think you would write a book in the same world as RED QUEEN? VA: I would say never say never, but I’m definitely playing in different sandboxes right now.

Q: Do you worldbuild as you go or do you know every backstory beforehand? VA: For RED QUEEN - and maybe this is why this is the first book I ever finished - I did a lot of the worldbuilding as I went. I got my bases, but then I really pushed myself to start writing as quickly as possible. In the past, I worldbuilded so many books, and you kind of burn out your inspiration on trying endless maps, trade routes, character backstories, and family trees. I think RED QUEEN was little bit of both. This new story, I did a little bit more of worldbuilding to begin with, but it really made myself jumping. I think there’s definitely a benefit to extensive worldbuilding. Most of it, at least in my experience, does not make it on the page, but it does help the author metabolize the world and the characters to the point where you’re writing it second nature, you’re not entirely thinking about what they’re doing, it’s just happening because you already know.

Q: Do you have an exact vision of every place? VA: Some places, yes. Some scenes, yes. Some scenes, it’s like shot for shot in my brain, it’s like watching it on a movie screen. Some places, it’s fuzzy at the edges and it’s just the people’s faces I see. But sometimes even those are fuzzy.

Q: RED QUEEN characters in Hogwarts houses? VA: Mare - Slytherin Maven - Slytherin Farley - Gryffindor Cal - Gryffindor for sure, he’s such a blockhead. Kilorn - Hufflepuff Elara - Ravenclaw Evangeline - has Slytherin, Gryffindor, and Ravenclaw tendencies. I do not believe in split houses.

Q: Did Maven and Thomas have a romantic relationship? VA: Yes. I believed and wrote Maven as bisexual.

Q: What inspired you the powerful and amazing ending of GLASS SWORD? It’s iconic! VA: GLASS SWORD is definitely my weakest of the four books, I think. That one was tough. Adjusting to writing a book in a vacuum versus writing a book when you had a first book and there was a third one coming, that was really tough. But the ending of that book is probably my favorite. “I kneel.” I remember I wrote those words and [screamed].

*Transcript by me :) (Yes, for the first time in maybe two years, I finally have all the time in the world again.)

*You may also watch the live session on VA’s IGTV.

[fandom-necromancer]

Time for a vacation

This was prompted by an amazing anon! I really like Gavin and Eli as bros! Hope you enjoy!

Fandom: Detroit become human | Characters: Elijah & Gavin | Background Ship: Reed900

‘Ah damn, when was the last time we were here?’, Elijah sighed as he exited the car he had parked manually after the automated driver had refused to go off-road. ‘I would guess before you decided to play god?’, Gavin answered, smiling as Elijah looked at him insecurely. ‘Hey, just a joke. But seriously, haven’t been here in a long time. But I still remember it. We used to play volley ball over there.’ ‘You were terrible.’ ‘Says the one who was even worse than that.’ That made Elijah chuckle and shut the door, while Gavin was already excitedly gathering his bag and tried to get a hold of the next one. By then, Nines and Chloe had also made it out of the car and it was the RK900 that shoved his human away from the boot. ‘I will take care of that, Gavin, go and look for a nice place, will you?’ Immediately, the human had let go and bolted.

‘Good to see he is still as easily excitable as he was when we were young’, Elijah chuckled and took his share before locking the car and walking over to the spot Gavin was already frantically waving from. ‘He is’, Nines nodded. ‘And he really meant it as a joke, he told me on multiple occasions I was the best thing to ever happen to him and you were the reason for my creation.’ He winked at Cyberlife’s reinserted CEO. ‘Use that information however you may wish.’ He left Elijah standing there and walked the rest of the way. The human smirked, then followed.

They sat down on the blanket in the sand and stared ahead over the Lake Huron, that, if you didn’t know it was a lake, seemed to stretch endlessly like the open sea. Nines and Chloe had decided that sitting around and talking about the olden times was something inherently human ergo boring and had taken to exploring the beach. What left Gavin and Elijah alone on their blanket. ‘I still remember Lizzy and Dad taking us up here’, Gavin spoke up as the silence stretched and only the waves could be heard. ‘Simpler times.’ ‘You think so?’, Eli asked. ‘I don’t know, 2020 was a bitch.’ ‘Yeah, alright. But except that… I mean, it was all still… working out, you know?’ ‘You mean mom?’ Gavin nodded. ‘I mean I didn’t really know my mom, stayed with dad and never really saw her, but from what I’ve heard…’ He swallowed. ‘I always looked up to Lizzy and thought that she would never be like that.’ ‘Yeah, I’d hoped my mom would be different, too’, Elijah agreed. ‘I know I wasn’t home a lot back then but… Well, some things reached even me at Colbridge.’

‘Phck, this was supposed to be fun, not us getting depressed over the past’, Gavin laughed and leaned back. ‘Come on. We both know what happened and that it was shitty and that we were far better off in Detroit far away from them. That’s like... canon now. Tell me what I don’t know! What are you working on at the moment?’ ‘Err…’ Kamski threw him a nervous side glance, Gavin immediately caught onto. ‘Hey, I know I won’t understand a thing. Just try to explain it. If I can’t figure it out, it’s my shitty brain’s fault.’ ‘I believe the best Detective of the DPD is cleverer than he likes to think’, Eli teased. ‘Whoo, someone stared at the employee of the month posters a bit too long’, Gavin waved it away. ‘Come on, humour me.’

‘Pff, I don’t even know Gavin. These days I’m not stuck in the lab all day. Honestly, I mostly am a representative and manage finances… There’s little room for creativity and I believe the politics of companies are one of the least interesting things for you.’ ‘I know Cyberlife’s trying hard to hide their racist views. Gotta be the new android-healthcare supplier that helps them build mods and get their own bodies and stuff.’ ‘Hey, it wasn’t racist as they really just were machines.’ ‘Oh, come on. Do household robots really need to look human? Can’t tell me deviancy wasn’t a shiny experiment gone too far.’ ‘We are actually looking into this’, Elijah remembered. ‘Where did it come from? It’s a really interesting questions, because we don’t really know and… What?’ Gavin had crossed his arms behind his head, smiled and closed his eyes. ‘Ah, nothing, just that’s my brother. Doesn’t matter if you are working numbers all the time and are immensely frustrated over… I don’t know copyright strikes or something. You still have that spark you had when you first soldered together your first circuits and almost burned yourself.’ ‘Oh come on, I didn’t-‘ ‘You didn’t, but who is to thank for that?’ ‘You’, Eli chuckled. ‘Alright, yes, I still sit alone at home in my lab when I’m back from work and I might have to tell the researchers to turn a blind eye on some lines because I might not be entirely innocent when it comes to deviancy, but-‘ Gavin had opened his mouth at that point, but Eli shushed him. ‘Hey, I certainly didn’t expect this, I wanted to prove a point, that’s all. But anyways, I wanted to ask about you. What are you doing lately?’

Gavin exhaled deeply, frowning. ‘Not much, really. I’m still living in my flat with my cats. Well, and Nines, who is amazing and awesome and sweat and-‘ ‘You have a boyfriend, yes, I’m aware, what else?’ ‘Hey, we’re engaged, okay? I’m serious. Might even marry that one.’ ‘Really?’ ‘Hey, my other boyfriends were assholes, it seems I inherited my taste in bad partners from dad, but that doesn’t apply to Nines, because he’s the driving force for once. Anyways, Nines is perfect, and I plan on spending the rest of my life with him, because I’ve been lonely and miserable for too long.’ He took a break to breathe and continued: ‘Yeah, cats, Nines, flat. What else? I’ve nearly finished repairing that old bike I’ve bought.’ Eli blinked. ‘That’s been sitting in that garage for how long now?’ ‘Too long, but it’ll be finished next summer, I swear! Also, might finally get back to narcotics now that the others have homicide back under control. I’ve seen enough murdered people and crying family members for a while.’ ‘And narcotics is better, because...?’ ‘Because there generally isn’t as much drama. I mean come on, who uses Red Ice? The super-rich people I don’t care for-‘ ‘Hey!’ ‘And the lowest people that have done far worse than drugs. Everyone in between uses the normal stuff. You don’t have to explain a grieving wife or husband why their partners aren’t coming back. Or what’s actually worse: you don’t have to talk to severely traumatised androids who will be punished for a crime that was self-defence. Like you know no court will let them go, not yet, not when everyone still thinks they are machines.’ ‘And there we are at the depressive part again…’

Gavin chuckled. ‘Yeah, I guess. But I’m really happy to get back into it and Nines will get his Detective badge soon too. Has to retake Academy classes now because programming isn’t enough anymore. Well, once he made it, we will be partners. Can’t wait for that.’ ‘What happened to “I don’t do partners”?’ ‘He became “I do partners”’, Gavin smirked. ‘If you know what I mean.’ ‘Argh, why do I even talk to you?’, Elijah asked equally disgusted and amused. ‘Hey, as long as you are happy…’

‘We do have to meet more often’, Gavin demanded once his laughter had calmed. ‘I miss you, even if you are the slimiest person alive. Was a good idea coming here for the weekend.’ ‘I have to agree’, Elijah nodded and focussed back on an enormous container ship in the distance. ‘I missed talking to you, too. Calling over the phone simply isn’t the same.’ ‘Yeah.’ Gavin sat up again and suddenly perked up as he looked at someone behind Elijah, causing the man to turn, too.

‘Oh, Chloe, I could kiss you, there’s nothing better than hot-dogs on the beach, I’m starving!’ That marked the end of their conversation, as the two androids had come back with food and drinks. But Elijah had gotten to know what he had wanted to hear. And there would be plenty of occasions for more now.

[whichpercydoyouthink]

The one where Qing Ming is kind of like Robin Hood but is also the adopted father of numourous children and Bo Ya just wanted his job back... or something

So it’s been brought to my attention that The Yin Yang Master (2021) is based on the video game and The Yin-Yang Master: Dream of Eternity (2020) is based on the novel which makes sense now that I’ve watched the former and seen how different they are. I wasn’t aware of this before I watched it, though, and as a result, I couldn’t help comparing it a lot. Which was a mistake because despite sharing the characters Qing Ming and Bo Ya as well as their fictional universe, they are very very different movies with different strengths and weaknesses (apart from their shared beautiful visuals and soundtrack, ofc). During this rant/rave unfortunately I won’t be able to stop myself in the comparisons as that is how I experienced the movie but I will try my best to separate them as much as possible.

BUT, before I do anything else, a summary: we start with a glimpse in the past in which Qing Ming is caught betraying the Yin Yang Bureau (yeah, so apparently there’s an entire BUREAU which explains a lot) and after killing some guy called Ci Mu, and escapes using a Thor-worthy teleportation spell. Skip some years and we have Capital Guard Bo Ya who encounters the rogue Qing Ming when he hijacks the transportation of some tributes and generally annoys the heck out of Bo Ya. When Bo Ya is suspended as a result, he goes on a journey to find Qing Ming in the Monster Realm and arrest him. Along the way he meets a girl called Shen Le equally eager to find Qing Ming. As they find Qing Ming, the pair get caught in a conflict between Qing Ming and literally everyone else, eventually being swept up in a battle to save both the human and monster worlds from the clutches of the great evil wanting to take over the world. Feat: Qing Ming’s dark past and a boss lady called Bai Ni.

One of the things that really stood out in this movie (for me at least) was the rich and colourful world it explored. Seriously, it’s like something out of Star Warsor Guardians of the Galaxy except without the space, and magic instead of guns/lightsabres. There were so many interesting monsters and places to see. I loved Qing Ming’s home and the little world it contained with all his familiars. I also loved the monster city and the Spirited Away-esque bridge thing, that was really cool. It was just so entertaining to see the characters interact with this world even some of them were also discovering with us and it felt big and detailed and creative. This world-building is something I feel this movie did better than Dream of Eternity, if only for the fact that the world felt bigger, and we got a lot more information on things that weren’t necessarily needed for the plot but were still cool to see.

I also enjoyed the fresh characters this movie presented around Bo Ya and Qing Ming. It was kind of like watching an alternate universe but that was also an awesome experience in itself because I got to see Bo Ya and Qing Ming in a different way, in different situations and I got to fall in love with more characters. I thought Shen Le was cool and I loved the sibling-like squabbling she and Bo Ya shared as it filled the Bo Ya and Qing Ming partnership-shaped hole in my heart. Same goes for badass Bai Ni and her more mature old friends-turned-enemies relationship with Qing Ming. The character who became my new favourite was the Red Ghost, though, like seriously, that ability of his was freaking awesome and made him practically indestructible. He also, like, ditched his bully captors and saw Bo Ya as worthy of being his master so he obviously has good taste. In addition, despite what I’m gonna say about the movie’s villains later, I will say that the Snow Lady/Queen was interesting. Her airy voice-thing was slightly annoying, but her powers were cool and it was awesome to see her in a fight scene. She was all swish swish, bendy bendy, ‘join my master’. I definitely liked her better than he-who-shall-not-be-named-but-will-later-be-described (I hope others who have watched are able to guess who).

I gotta say, I really mourned the loss of Bo Ya and Qing Ming’s chance to properly work as a team and bond. I mean, they did reach a place where Qing Ming was amused by the angry child chasing him and Bo Ya grudgingly respected the mischievous Yin Yang Master, but I wanted more scenes where they worked together. I felt they barely had any moments where it was just them. Oh well. That’s just me comparing it to Dream of Eternity too much, I guess.

To be fair, in pushing away Dream of Eternity from my mind, I did really like the new take on both Qing Ming and Bo Ya’s characters. Qing Ming definitely had more of a rule-breaking outcast vibe, and I thought the actor did a fantastic job. Bo Ya was adorable but in a younger, less experienced way. To that end, the relationship between Qing Ming and Bo Ya was less as equals and more of an older/ younger friendship. Which, I guess, isn’t too strange considering in this one, Qing Ming was undoubtably the main character, with less of a chance for them to share the spotlight.

Ok, so, I don’t like to complain, and I don’t say this to warn people away from the movie BUT I can’t deny that (to me) the first half of the movie definitely felt better than the second half. I don’t know, maybe that’s just when the plot really starts to kick in and for me, the plot kind of felt like the let down of the movie. It just didn’t captivate me as much and with kind of terrible villains, it just wasn’t as good for me. I love movies with a good antagonist, particularly one that doesn’t look quite so… ridiculous. Maybe it was just me but the flowing red hair, reindeer horns and giant spider hand-thing didn’t really impress me as much as an immortal snake man who actually has an emotionally driven motivation. The bridge battle didn’t really feel as high stakes as they tried to make it, I don’t know, maybe that was just me. And the way Qing Ming took down the bad guys and the way it ended? Wasn’t really satisfying to me. I guess it leaves room for a second movie? I’m not really sure. (I’m trying really hard not to spoil anything if you can tell.)

No but don’t let that dissuade anyone. Seriously, it’s still a good movie in my eyes and I enjoyed it, especially as it definitely answered a lot of the questions Dream of Eternity left me with. Yes, the plot kind of sucked but the worldbuilding was fantastic and the different realms were interesting to explore. Maybe if you plan to watch both movies, watch this one before Dream of Eternity. That way you will be able to enjoy it without comparing the plot/characters so much AND you’ll be able to go into Dream of Eternity with some knowledge of the world already and maybe come out with less questions. But seriously, they’re good movies separately. So, give it a go, I guess. If you want, that is.

Completely irrelevant side note here (screenshot below) but did Qing Ming in that scene make anyone briefly think of Inuyasha or was I the only one who was reminded my that while watched? No? Just me? Ok. I haven't even watched the anime wth why did I think of this.

[nanowrimo]

Meet Our New NaNo Interns: Sandra, Chyina, and Fatima!

We feel super lucky here at NaNo HQ to be able to work with some excellent interns! Today, meet our newest cohort of interns: Sandra, Chyina, and Fatima. You’ll be getting to know them better throughout November, but today they’re here to tell you a little about themselves:

Sandra, Programs Intern

Hi Wrimos—it’s going to be a weird one this year! I type this introduction from the brick buildings of Providence, Rhode Island, where I remain holed up with my housemates. Our walls are thin enough that we can hear each other as we attend our respective classes; we emerge for sustenance and, occasionally, the craven desire for friendship, which would be typical for college students if it weren’t for the ever-present pandemic looming over our heads. 

Last night, I woke up shivering because of an unaccountable cold snap, when it’s usually sweltering in Rhode Island until late September. Meanwhile my family in California wake up to red skies and temperatures well into the 100s. I haven’t felt this unsure about my future since I was eight and learned that someday, the sun would swell into a red giant and vaporize our planet, and in such chaos, I find myself exceedingly grateful for the regular annual event of NaNoWriMo.

This NaNoWriMo, I’m looking forward to seeing all the wonderful ways our community can reach across the web to connect! Already, in the YWP forums I’ve seen so many ways young writers are supporting each other in these times of stress; who’s to say us ancient ones can’t equally rise to the occasion? Right now, the constant in my life is looking for the kinder moments in life, the neighbors helping each other, the small acts of solidarity and compassion in even just a pal reaching out to check on me. I anticipate many of those moments emerging this November, as writer alike helps each other to the finish line. 

I said it would be a weird one this year, but weird is good, I’ve found. Weird is memorable—in the long and storied history of NaNoWriMo, this year will truly stand out as a novel-ty (hah). As this year’s Program Intern, I hope this introduction has already told you what you need to know about me: I love this community, and my entire role is devoted to cheering you all on. It’s a selfish wish too—I’ll be alongside the rest of you, trucking along with a garbled mess of a novel, and feeding off the communal energy. 

Anyone who undertakes the creative behemoth of NaNoWriMo in these times has already won, in my humble opinion, as creators and authors of tales waiting to be told. Looking forward to the next few months!

Chyina, Editorial Intern

Picture a young girl reading the complete works of Edgar Allan Poe. Fast forward a few years and she has discovered that the only thing she wants to do is work with words: reading them, writing them, editing them, or making them up. Now, imagine a year of pure chaos and craziness.

You may have guessed that the girl is me and that the year is 2020. Well, as ridiculous as this year has been, it did give me the opportunity to work with NaNoWriMo as an intern. I have been participating since I was in high school and when I found out that they were looking for remote interns for the first time ever, I had to apply. And I cannot wait to begin working as the Editorial Intern this fall.

For the curious minds who may want to know more about who I am, my favorite book is The Book of Disquiet by Fernando Pessoa, a book I discovered when I participated in DisQuiet, an international literary program. It’s a book the author calls his “factless autobiography” and has a timeless quality I aspire to have in my own work. I try to find inspiration in the little things, like the leaf floating through the air or why that one book in your library smells like gasoline. 

I also am the cofounder of the Women of Color Writers’ Circle, which is an international group dedicated to showcasing and nurturing the voices of women of color. I haven’t thought of a solid NaNo project yet, but I have dozens of ideas floating in my head. 

Thanks for having me! I can’t wait to get started working with all my fellow word nerds.

Fatima, Tech Intern

Hey y’all!

My name is Fatima and I am super excited to be joining this amazing community as your fall tech intern. I am currently a junior at Cornell University majoring in Information Science and Sociology. I am studying remotely from Illinois this year, which means I am always a mess and in fear of missing a meeting. My classes are on Eastern Standard Time, this internship is on Pacific Standard Time, but I am living in Central Standard Time. Time zones are beating me up. (Fun fact: I learned about the existence of Mountain Standard Time at my first NaNoWriMo HQ meeting a few weeks ago)

I am passionate about racial and gender equity in tech and the intersections of the humanities with technology. On campus, I’m trying to start a Digital Humanities club and am involved in many womxn of color organizations. A few personal projects of mine currently are getting my email inbox down to 0 (last week it was 5,035, today it’s 3,454--progress!), finishing the Couch to 5K challenge (I'm on week 5), and finding out who Mary Alice really is on Desperate Housewives.

I say that I’ve been a Wrimo since I was 12, but I’ve only fully participated one year. I’ve tried to do different takes on the challenge like writing in my journal every day (very relaxing, definitely recommend) and writing a short story every day (was really hard to come up with new ideas and sadly I burnt out quickly). I also enjoy watching NaNoWriMo prep videos and vlogs on YouTube, introducing friends to NaNoWriMo, and following writing inspiration accounts on Instagram and Pinterest. I definitely talk about writing and call myself a writer more than I actually write but that will all change this November (hopefully)!

[ambenya]

Lumity Month 2020 Day 8 - Human World Visit

Sorry this is really late! Here’s day 8 of @thekitsune‘s @lumity-month! I’m sorry if the ending isn’t the best I’m trying my best not to pass out while writing this. I did like writing this though. So this takes place after everything so the group can now go back and forth between realms if they want. Anyway, thank you all and I hope you enjoy this fanfic as well.

--------------------------------------------------------------------

Amity was excited about her date with Luz. The two had been dating for a while now and while Amity had been to the human world before to visit Luz this would be their first date there.

Amity had decided a simple black shirt with a red plaid skirt would be good and not make her stand out. She also wore her hair down and put on the beanie hoping to hide the tips of her ears. Once she was confident that she wouldn’t stand out too much Amity made her way to the Owl House to meet up with Luz.

When she got to the house, she saw Luz standing outside waiting for her. “Hey, Luz!” Amity calls out and waves at her girlfriend who turns to see her.

“Amity! You look amazing as always. Are you ready to go?” Luz asks excitedly as Amity walks up to her.

Amity blushes at the compliment and smiles. “I’m ready when you are, and you look good as well.” Amity responses shyly.

“Let’s go tell Eda we’re ready then.” Luz grins as her cheeks turn a light shade of red.

The two make their way inside the house to Eda who opens the portal for them.

“Okay, you two stay out of trouble, be safe, and be back to where the portal opens in three hours,” Eda said before the couple step through.

“We will and see you later, Eda,” Luz said as she takes Amity’s hand and walked right through the portal.

The two find themselves standing outside the abandoned house not too far from Luz’s house. “Okay, let’s get this date started.” Luz grins as she squeezes Amity’s hand.

As Amity follows Luz, she can’t help but be curious as to where Luz had planned for them on their date. “So, what is the plan?” She asked.

“I figured we could go to this place called an arcade! It has games and prizes. I think you will enjoy it a lot.” Luz grinning as the two left the woods and started their walk toward their destination.

Amity smiled softly as Luz began to talk about how human school was going. She missed seeing the human at school every day but thankfully Luz’s mom would let her go to the Boiling Isles most days after school and during the weekends so she could continue to learn magic. Apparently, it was a good creative outlet and Luz wasn’t getting in trouble as much anymore and even made a few new friends.

Suddenly the couple stopped in front of a building that had bright lights. Amity looked in amazement at the building. Luz looked at her girlfriend and smiled before she dragged her into the arcade.

Amity felt her eyes light up at all the colors and felt her ears twitch at the noises. It was different than what they had in the Boiling Isles.

“So, I take it you like it?” Luz asked grinning at the witch.

“Wow, this looks awesome. I don’t even know where to start.” Amity responded excitedly.

“How about we play a few of the games? Maybe if you’re lucky you can beat me at a few.” Luz smirked at her girlfriend.

Amity returned the smirk before shooting back, “You’re on!”

Luz laughed as she intertwined their hands again before going to a machine and getting some tokens and running off to a fighting game.

Amity ended up winning 2 out of 3 of their matches. “I see someone has been practicing recently,” Luz said in a playful tone.

“Maybe just a little bit…” Amity said smirking.

They then moved on to a basketball game, then a racing game, followed by a few rounds of a dancing game that drew a small crowd to watch them. After the dancing game, the two decided to get something to drink and rest for a moment.

“You’ve got some pretty good moves there, Blight,” Luz said with a smirk.

Amity returned the smirk and winked, “You weren’t bad yourself, Noceda.”

The two share a grin before leaning in when they suddenly hear a voice, “Wow, didn’t expect to see the weirdo here.” The two turn their heads to see three girls that Luz recognized as some popular kids from her school.

Luz sighed annoyed that the group was interrupting her date with Amity. “What do you want, Emily?” She asked hoping they would go away.

“I was just coming to see if my eyes were playing tricks on me, but it looks like you really were with some poor unfortunate soul.” The girl known as Emily said as she eyed Amity. Amity felt herself getting mad but tried to stay calm for Luz’s sake.

“You do know your friend here is a freak, right?” Another girl chimed in talking to Amity.

“Maybe she’s a freak too look her hair is green. I’m mean who even dyes their hair green.” The third girl said pointing at Amity’s hair.

Luz glares at the group but before she can say anything Amity stops her.

“Okay a few things for you all to understand, Luz is not a freak. She weird, a little eccentric, and kind of impulsive but she is not a freak. Also, I’m not a poor unfortunate soul or her friend. She’s my girlfriend and I love her more than anything. And don’t you ever talk about my hair again. Now I suggest you three run along now. We have a date to get back to unlike you three it seems. Come on, Luz.” Amity says with a smirk before holding Luz’s hand and walking away from the group who was red from embarrassment.

“Wow, I always forget how sassy you can really be until your mean girl comes out. Not that it’s a bad thing. Thanks for standing up to them for me.” Luz said with a huge grin.

Amity looked at her girlfriend with a soft smile. “Of course, what kind of girlfriend would I be if I let them treat you like that? Anyway, feel free to let me know if they bother you again.”

Luz felt her cheeks turn red and leaned onto Amity as they walked around looking for something else to do when Luz’s eyes land on a claw machine.

“Oh! Let’s do that!” Luz says before dragging Amity over to the machine.

Amity looks at the machine confused. “Why this one?” Amity asked looking at all the stuffed animals inside.

“You’ll see. Is there anything standing out from the plushies?” Luz asked glancing at Amity.

Amity looked at all the plushies before one caught eye. It looked easy to reach and like it was loose compared to most of the plushies in the machine.

“That one is pretty cute,” Amity said pointing to it. Luz’s eyes followed to where Amity was pointing to a purple otter plushie.

“Okay! Hang on.” Luz said before she put in some tokens and the claw at the top began to move as Luz guided it. After making sure that the claw was over the otter plush Luz pushed the button and the claw dropped down and grabbed the plush toy, picking it up, carrying over to an opening, and dropping it in the hole.

Luz reached down grinning and grab the otter before standing back up and handing it to Amity. “Here you go! It’s all yours.”

Amity looked at the plushie while blushing before lifting her hands to grab it softly. “Umm… Thank you, Luz. You didn’t have to…” Amity said as she held to plushie close to her heart.

“No, but I wanted to. Think of it a thank you present and as a memento of this date.” Luz said with an embarrassed smile.

“Well, in that case, I’m using the ticket to get a present for you. It’s only fair.” Amity said with a soft smile.

Luz nodded and the two went to the prize room and looked around. Luz’s eyes fell on a cute green and brown cat plushie and it made her smile. Amity noticed where her girlfriend was looking and smirked. She had already counted the tickets and knew they had just enough to get it, so she grabbed the toy and went to the counter and turned in the tickets. Once the worker knew they had enough they gave Amity the stuffed animal which she then gave to Luz.

“Here you go, Luz. I know you wanted it.” Amity said with a smile.

Luz blushed as she grabbed the plushie hugging it close to her grinning. “Thank you, Amity! I love it so much! It reminds me so much of you.” Luz said jumping up and down.

Amity blushed at Luz’s words before smiling back. “That’s why I wanted this one. It reminds me of you.” The green-haired witch said before looking up at the clock and noticing the time.

“We should probably get going. Wouldn’t want to make Eda mad, would we?” Amity with a smirk.

Luz laughed before nodding. The two made their way out of the building and headed to the abandoned house. They talked about a few small things before they walked up to the building and the portal activated right then as if Eda knew when to expect them.

The couple walked through the portal holding hands smiling. When they arrived, Eda smiled looking at the plush toys in their hands.

Luz walked Amity out and the two smiled. “I had a lot of fun. I would like to do it again sometime.” Amity said with a shy smile.

Luz smiled before reaching up and pulling the hat off Amity’s head. “I would like that too. Also, you should wear your hair down more. It’s beautiful just like the rest of you.” Luz said as she ran her fingers through Amity’s hair making her blush.

“I’ll keep that in mind. Anyway, I better head home before it gets too late. I love you, Luz.” Amity said with a small smile.

“Okay, I have to go too. I better get that homework done. I love you too, mi amor.” Luz said before giving Amity a quick kiss goodnight and walking back into the Owl House.

Amity felt herself blushing and smiling the whole way home and that night she fell asleep cuddling her otter plush while in a different realm Luz fell asleep cuddling her cat plush each of them dreaming peacefully of their girlfriend.

[bobbystompy]

My Top 88 Songs Of 2020

Previously: 2019, 2018, 2017, 2016, 2015, 2014, 2013, 2012, 2011

Though we couldn’t get as trim as last year’s 75, still very happy to keep this under 100 for the second year in a row. This was a very difficult year in many ways, but music helped make it more bearable.

As always, criteria and info:

This is a list of what I personally like, not ones I’m saying are the “best” from the year; more subjective than objective

No artist is featured more than once

If it comes down to choosing between two songs, I try to give more weight to a single or featured track

Each song on the list is linked in the title if you wanna check them out for yourself; there is also a Spotify playlist at the bottom that includes the majority of the songs

Usually a pump up video goes here, but 2020 had a different energy, so Michael, take us in.

88) Katy Perry - “Smile”

Even Katy Perry’s good songs are a swirling spiral of maxed out auto-tune. This one is just fine. It’s... fine.

87) All Time Low - “Trouble Is...”

Is All Time Low the Katy Perry of pop punk?

86) Tee Grizzley f/ Payroll Giovanni - “Payroll”

I have never heard of Payroll Giovanni, but I have two questions:

1) Is this his song, and he got Tee to jump on it?

2) Or, did Tee write a song called “Payroll” and think to himself “You know who would be great on this? Payroll Giovanni!”

Favorite stretch:

Listen, we is not the same, you say "door", I say "dough" You say "floor", I say "flow", you say "for sure", I say "fa'sho"

85) Lady Gaga & Ariana Grande - “Rain On Me”

Coming out in 2020 probably hurt this song, because I have no, like, out of the house memories with it. You can only have so much fun with Big Singers Singing over a pulsing beat when it’s coming from the phone in your kitchen as you’re indifferently scrambling eggs.

84) Benjamin Gibbard - “Life In Quarantine”

Now this is a song you can do nothing to; almost feels like it’s reluctant to even exist. It got released in March of 2020, so the outro (“No one is going anywhere soon”) served as a too sad reminder/mantra for what the year was about to be. Second shout out to Gibbard for the many YouTube sets he put together during the early stages of the pandemic (when so many of his peers were trying to figure out the next move).

83) Cardi B f/ Megan Thee Stallion - “WAP”

This felt less like a song and more of a “whoa, did you see the music video?!” and/or a means to relitigate the eternal question “What is the sexual line in music?” And while it was fun to watch people freak the fuck out... the quality itself really needed to be better.

(Note: YouTube video is the edited chorus; explicit version here)

82) McKayla Maroney - “Wake Up Call”

Former Olympic gymnast McKayla Maroney -- of medals and memes fame -- dips her toe into the music waters. It’s inside-the-box modern pop music. One thing that’s hard to escape: it doesn’t really sound like her.

81) Chelsea Cutler - “Sad Tonight”

He vocals really remind me of Alessia Cara.

80) blink-182 - “Quarantine”

Blink doing a Bad Religion impression. Docked a few points for the very weak chorus lyrics (“Quarantine, fuck this disease”). That said, as serious as the song comes off, there are some clever punchlines to be found.

79) Dave Hause & Brian Fallon - “Long Ride Home”

This is kind of a nothing song, but it’s easy listening. Also, if your guitar leads can’t clear the “Could Bobby have written or performed this?” bar, then said leads are probably pretty weak.

78) Travis Scott & Kid Cudi - “THE SCOTTS”

Two artists who pair so well together, it’s hard to tell who exudes more influence on the track (eh, that’s not true, it’s Travis Scott, but Kid Cudi is more of a roommate than guest). They want you to be high by the time the instrumental outro hits.

77) The Strokes - “Bad Decisions”

The beginning sound feels somewhat evolved, but by the time Julian Casablancas croons “Making bad decisions”, the song feels like it could be on their debut album “Is This It?”. And it goes in and out like that from there.

76) Thundercat - “Dragonball Durag”

Thundercat is one of those artists I wish I liked more, but when the occasional track does hit, it’s a momentary glimpse into what real fans seem to always see.

75) TI f/ Lil Baby - “Pardon”

Standard fare. Lil Baby’s cameo is very meh.

74) Porches - “Do U Wanna”

For a song that repeatedly asks “Do you want to dance?”, it sure makes you feel like you’re moving in slow motion.

73) NOFX - “Thatcher Fucked The Kids” 

On the best-named album of the year (“West Coast vs. Wessex”), Frank Turner and NOFX cover each other’s material. To start us off, the legends take a song from 12 years ago about British politics from 40 years ago and, well, very easily apply it to right god damn now in America.

72) The Bombpops - “Dearly Departed”

Ahh, my year’s first cancelled concert. The listed names in V1 always make me want to skip this song -- but patience, grasshopper. Chorus is aight.

71) Ratboys - “Alien With A Sleep Mask On”

This band name will never match what the music sounds like.

70) Rolling Blackouts Coastal Fever - “She’s There”

The vocals in this song channel, like, four completely different singers for me, ranging from Bob Dylan to Cloud Nothings.

69) NOBRO - “Don’t Die”

An anthemic chorus meant to be belted in a room with sweaty strangers.

68) Oliver Tree f/ blink-182 - “Let Me Down”

The original solo version of this song is 1:52, and though the blink cameo pushes it over the dreaded two minute mark, it adds enough diversity to justify the choice (keep an eye out for the quick Green Day lyrical nod in the back half).

67) AJJ - “Normalization Blues”

This dropped in January, and if you thought the year was bad then. Punk News:

I'll admit I do want the album to age badly because I really don't want to have to listen to it years later and still say this is the world we're living in.

Said album being titled “Good Luck Everybody” is straight cryptic.

66) Selena Gomez - “Rare”

Very chill for big pop; triplet rhythm singing in the chorus gets me erry time.

65) Kid Cudi & Eminem - “The Adventures Of Moon Man & Slim Shady”

Cudi’s second split collab yields bigger results than his Travis Scott joint (admittedly with a worse beat here). It rarely ever hurts to let Eminem do the heavy lifting.

64) Alkaline Trio - “Smokestack”

A little cheerier than the average Alk3 song, but Dan Andriano seems like he’s been in a great place for a long time now; confident and in control. For me, the whole song builds up to the “You changed my life” chorus.

63) Frank Turner - “Scavenger Type”

Here, Frank takes on the acoustic closer to NOFX’s legendary 1994 album “Punk In Drublic”. Though the energy boost is most noticeable, my favorite part is how you can hear how much Turner loves this song as his melody bursts on the verses.

62) Mike Posner - “Alone In A Mansion”

Mike Posner, an artist I have a very soft spot for, released a storytelling concept album in 2020. From the intro track:

This album was written, recorded, and produced over a period of two weeks in Detroit, Michigan in my parents' basement. It's meant to be listened to all the way through. At least on the first listen. And it's about 36 minutes long. If you can't devote 36 minutes of undivided attention to this album, I again politely ask that you turn it off and return at a later time. I love you and I thank you for taking the time to listen in the first place. Also, it's important to note that the characters and the stories in this album are completely fictional. In addition, anyone struggling with a mental illness - depression, schizophrenia - should not listen to this album. Turn it off.

So those are the stakes. Pulling this song -- the record’s closer -- feels unfair void of context, but them’s the breaks.

61) Nada Surf - “Just Wait”

Heavy hitting chorus without having to be heavy; this could really work in a movie.

60) Matt Pond PA - “Wild Heart”

This having only 805 views on YouTube is criminal.

59) Liquid Death - “Unnecessary And Unimpressive”

Liquid Death -- in this iteration -- is a punk rock supergroup with members of Rise Against, Anti-Flag, The Lawrence Arms, and The Bombpops. If that didn’t interest you enough, all lyrics in the project (which, I believe, is for charity) come from hateful comments or negative reviews. Of the four artists involved, this sounds most like a Bombpops song, with Jen on lead vocals as others chime in.

58) PUP - “Rot”

Off my silver medalist for album name of the year (“This Place Sucks Ass”), PUP doesn’t do anything new here, but it was relieving to see them still going in 2020 when so many others got roadblocked, both physically and creatively.

57) Paul Harrold and the Nuclear Bandits - “Massanutten”

This reminds me of local Chicago artist Al Scorch. So much earnestness in the vocals, but a little more prairie for Harrold compared to speakeasy for Scorch. This would be a good road trip song. And I’m not talking about singalong... more for the stretch where you want to sit in silence and look out at the sun-kissed land blazing by. The song’s greatest victory is getting me to like something that cracks 6:00.

Note to future me: Massanutten is in Virginia (saved you a Google).

56) Kesha f/ Sturgill Simpson, Brian Wilson & Wrabel - “Resentment”

Kesha has been vulnerable in the past but never this stripped down sonically; the chorus would feel right at home on a country radio station. Love a good bridge, too.

55) Megan Thee Stallion f/ Beyoncé - “Savage (Remix)”

An up-and-comer pairing with a legend rarely lets down when both sides are this locked in. Bey wins. Fav line: “If you don't jump to put jeans on, baby, you don't feel my pain”.

She matches flows with Megan but also brings melody. Her blessing takes this song from pretty damn good to undeniably great.

That beat, too.

54) Red City Radio - “Baby Of The Year”

If all you want to do right now is grab a drink in a bar, here is a video built to troll.

(Also: a Liquid Death cameo?!)

53) Nathaniel Rateliff - “And It’s Still Alright”

The last time Mr. Rateliff had our attention, he just wanted a drink. That hit had a chorus with the very-sad-when-removed-from-the-song “If I can't get clean, I'm gonna drink my life away” lyric. Well, our man got sober since. And when the party is over, the introspection comes.

52) Direct Hit! - “HAVE YOU SEEN IT?”

Listening to slowed down Direct Hit! is like watching Usain Bolt lightly jog. It kinda makes sense because the core action is there, but it also feels sort of incorrect.

51) Hayley Williams - “Dead Horse”

Solo Hayley songs have this feel like they could do anything at any time... but then don’t. This one does the same until a very fun chorus breaks it up.

50) Kid Cudi f/ Phoebe Bridgers - “Lovin’ Me”

Probably the most improbable collab on this list (if 2020 hadn’t repeatedly taught us to not be surprised by anything).

49) The Homeless Gospel Choir - “Don’t Compare”

Listening to The Homeless Gospel Choir is kind of like getting a dedicated pep talk from a good friend... while fire rains down from the sky.

48) Carly Rae Jepsen - “Let’s Sort The Whole Thing Out”

Queen vocals with one prince of a tempo; this chorus is Sour Patch Kids riding Twix logs down a soda pop waterfall -- and it’s a b-side.

47) Green Day - “Meet Me On The Roof”

I like this song because it reminds me of summer and because it doesn’t really sound like Green Day (but still totally does).

46) Broadway Calls - “Meet Me On The Moon”

Promise -- swear -- I was gonna compare this Broadway Calls song to Green Day before realizing they both had titles about meeting in an escalated location. That said, I did put them next together on purpose to more coherently make this point.

45) David Rokos - “Building Bridges”

My buddy Dave wrote this song, and I think I’ve asked him three times what “burning sugar” meant (he says it’s a reference to absinthe). This song will make you want to travel to enjoy not only the places but the people around you.

44) Charli XCX - “claws”

Charli XCX keeps it futuristic in a video that could be described as sexy, cheesy, goofy, and playful-yet-serious.

43) Brian Fallon - “Lonely For You Only”

This is too easy and should not work (and maybe doesn’t). But that chorus... that circular phrasing... it still takes me all the way out. But I’m the same cat who proposed while a Gaslight Anthem cover was playing.

42) Waxahatchee - “Fire”

This song could be in a different language and hit just as hard.

41) Harry Styles - “Adore You”

Purifying pop.

40) Local H - “Hold That Thought”

Hardest rock song thus far. Local H was one of the first artists to play “live” once the lockdown hit (on a simultaneous YouTube/Facebook stream), and watching them attack music in their Chicago practice bunker felt a little bit like taking in the end of the world. New songs, old songs, covers -- it didn’t matter; their cool, unmatched apathy fits a pandemic or peacetime.

Ironically, was able to see them live in 2020, as they played a socially distanced, outdoor drive up concert in a minor league baseball parking lot. It wasn’t the same, but it was still something.

39) Crazy & The Brains - “I Don’t Deliver Pizza Anymore”

This song is just cool*. The verses feel tense and crucial, it starts to unspool in the pre-chorus, and the chorus itself feels like a light comedown more than anything else.

(* -  though the lyric video is docked some points for spelling y’all as “ya’ll”)

38) Drake f/ Fivio Foreign & Sosa Geek - “Demons”

Menacing Drizzy can be very fun from time to time. Also more than happy to keep “Toosie Slide” very far away from this list.

37) Hey Dad!!! - “Life’s Alright”

Small band, big song; though summer feels light-years away.

36) insignificant other - “i’m so glad i feel this way about you”

This song lands a big haymaker in the first few seconds, so it was probably a good call to pull back some for the chorus and, eventually, outro.

35) BTS - “Dynamite”

Heard they made the lyrics bad on purpose for their English hit, which makes sense, because they’re bad. That said, if you listen knowing they’re supposed to be bad, it kinda makes them... good? Listen, 771 million views would have me singing nursery rhymes in Pig Latin.

34) DaBaby f/ RODDY RICCH - “ROCKSTAR”

Someone said this could be the song of the summer, but, because there wasn’t really a summer, I feel like I only heard it once all year. Also, are we really pretending Post Malone* didn’t just do a “like a rockstar” song three years ago?

(* - and N.E.R.D. before that and Cypress Hill before that... though N.E.R.D. only waiting a year after Cypress, so maybe DaBaby actually was patient)

33) The Front Bottoms - “the hard way”

Don’t take it easy on the animal / I am the animal

Not quite sure what this line means, but I fixate on the phrasing every single time. This song sounds resigned in a very self-aware way.

32) The 1975 - “If You’re Too Shy (Let Me Know)”

For a band called The 1975, they sure sound like they’re on their ‘80s shit here. Also, a real thing that happened:

Me: Is he coercing her to get naked?! I thought this band was woke.

/scans lyrics

/notices “She said” before the “Maybe I would like you better if you took off your clothes” line

Me: Ahh.

Sax solo, take us out.

31) Charly Bliss & PUP - “It’s Christmas And I Fucking Miss You”

A song that is already a forever staple on all my future Xmas playlists.

30) 2 Chainz f/ Ty Dolla $ign & Lil Duval - “Can’t Go For That”

Shorty said she love me / I said “I love me back”

This is a real genre blur; rap at its core, but also soulful, funky, and very danceable. Damn creative.

29) Billie Eilish - “Therefore I Am”

Billie's 2020 gave a few singles -- but no new album -- and a body shaming scandal where the backlash to the backlash probably caused more headlines than the tweet that started it all. Still, she stays on cruise control above the clouds; can all eyes be on you if they can’t even make you out?

Video for this is fun, too. Not sure if her running amok in an empty mall is more of a COVID necessity or commentary on the dying retail industry. As always with her, fill in your own blanks for now.

28) Future f/ Drake - “Life Is Good”

This was my most listened to rap song in the first half of the year, and bumping again now, almost forgot how good it is. Drake just chasing one-liner Instagram captions in the first half:

- “Haven’t done my taxes, I’m too turnt up”

- “N****s caught me slipping once, OK, so what?”

- “B****, this is fame not clout, I don’t even know what that’s about”

And, of course, “Workin’ on the weekend like usual”. The man could make anything glamorous. Let’s hit that H&R Block, bro!

Future’s back half is a totally different song and feels mostly like noise, but the vibe is cool, so I don’t even totally mean that in a bad way. You can even make out a “Got Promethazine in my blood and Percocet” lyric to mark your Future bingo card and immediately move on.

27) I’m Glad It’s You - “The Silver Cord”

This song feels like cold air blowing on the back of your neck.

(Sidebar: thought this band was called The Silver Cord until literally right now)

26) The Spill Canvas - “Mercy”

A dreamy, distorted, at-home version of whatever you remember The Spill Canvas sounding like. This song is confessional and at peace, with the Grade A self-loathing we’ve come to love from this band.

25) 100 gecs f/ Charli XCX, Rico Nasty & Kero Kero Bonito - “ringtone (remix)”

100 gecs first hit my radar with the explosively obnoxious “money machine”, but that’s a 2019er, so this remix to “ringtone” will have to do. It’s catchy like a younger sibling persistently singing a song you’re sick of hearing*.

(* - /only child trying to work in sibling analogies)

24) iann dior f/ Machine Gun Kelly & Travis Barker - “Sick And Tired”

Iann Dior -- ...yeah -- channels Juice WRLD on the hook, and MGK/Travis Barker buoy a track that, honestly, doesn’t really even need the help.

23) Nick Lutsko - “Unleash Your Spirit”

Lutsko hit my radar on Twitter with some legendary political anthems (word to the RNC and Dan Bongino + his Dashboard Trump parody). “Unleash Your Spirit” is the song I most fear hearing (or even thinking of) within a few minutes of going to bed. Not because it’s Halloween theme is scary -- because it’s that god damn catchy. It permeates your brain. True story: a week ago, I woke up in the middle of the night with “Bobbing for apples with the boys” so ingrained in my head, it felt like someone was standing there yelling it through a megaphone.

22) Dogleg - “Kawasaki Backflip”

Bad 2020 robbed many concerts from us, and not getting to see this band live might take the cake. I end the year liking them but could have been *all in* with the right performance and the right venue. Also, Song Title of the Year until further notice.

21) Eminem f/ Juice WRLD - “Godzilla”

Eminem has all of the words and all of the lyrical dexterity, but sometimes it feels like there isn’t anything to ground him. Enter: one of the best beats he’s ever spit on and a Juice WRLD hook to give it pop angle. But let’s not put Slim in the corner -- when he starts accelerating at the end, it’s is a true “holy fuck” moment. It sounds faster than if you actually fast forwarded.

The video ends with a touching audio message from Juice WRLD.

20) Soccer Mommy - “circle the drain”

This song is so gloriously ‘90s; it leans in and does not care.

19) Sam Russo - “Always Lost”

The first time I met you, we were on the last bus You passed me a bottle, and I knew you were one of us

Took 25 words to hook me; I was txting friends before the first chorus even hit.

18) Sincere Engineer - “Trust Me”

Deanna Belos pushes her vocals in this one. I asked about the performance, and she said it was one of the first ones they recorded in the studio, but when they were done and listening back to everything, she re-did this track because her throat was much more used to what the song required.

“That’s why it sounds like I’m on roids lol,” she added.

17) Jay Electronica f/ JAY-Z - “Flux Capacitor”

Jay Electronica signed to Roc Nation in November of 2010. At of the start of 2020, he had still -- STILL HOW FUCKING STILL -- not released a debut album. When he announced it was finally dropping in February, it was met with skeptic eyes. He’d “announced” before. Shit, he’d even posted track lists of albums that never saw the light of day. He was a tease’s tease. It ended up getting a release date of March 12. As the pandemic got really bad in the March 11 zone, he finally had an actual reason to delay the proceedings (the plan: a studio live stream listening party*).

But no -- this is Jay Electronica. Why wouldn’t he drop as the world was ending? The same reason why his costar wouldn’t not have a watch like a Saudi prince. It had to end for it to happen. I wish I saved the memes, because they were fantastic. All I have is my own Twitter memory to prove it happened:

I love this song entirely: the “get the gat” hook (soooo New Orleans), Hov calling out the NFL/acquaintances clout chasing his potential death/rapping forever bars, Jay Elect’s ham-fisted and awkward ass Farrakhan line. Everything is exactly where it should be.

Final verdict on the full album: I don’t know, a B or B+? It had a lot more Jay-Z than expected (wooo), but -- and I rarely say this -- it could have actually been longer.

16) New Found Glory - “Greatest Of All Time”

NFG with a song referencing the Jordan-Rodman-Pippen Bulls only a few months before “The Last Dance” aired. Dare we call it marketing genius? The punk beat does not care; the punk beat is too busy taking souls.

15) Dave Hause f/ Amythyst Kiah & Kam Franklin - “Your Ghost”

“I can’t breathe”

On the heels of the George Floyd/BLM protests came Dave Hause’s somber attempt to capture the moment, desperation, and hurt. On a podcast, he said he was aware he might not ever lead the movement but still wanted to contribute something in an effort to use his platform as a white artist to change someone, anyone’s mind going forward.

14) Taylor Swift - “this me trying”

The chorus makes me feel like the crowd is parting like the Red Sea on a high school -- shit, no, middle school -- dance floor; smoke machine and all. Your crush is waiting for you on the other side. What are you going to say?

13) Phoebe Bridgers - “Kyoto”

Phoebe is one of the best lyricists out because of her specificity, but even though this song is about her dad, you can really fit it to your own narrative.

12) The Lawrence Arms - “Last, Last Words”

The Lawrence Arms wrote their new record (which singer Chris McCaughan described as “this end of the world outpost”) prior to the pandemic, but once you start to process album themes -- and research its namesake -- you do wonder. All of this, combined with some “Catcher In The Rye” references, and we’ve got ourselves a winning formula.

Dressed to kill for oblivion 

11) New Lenox - “Fairytale Of Gary, Indiana”

Your boy plays drums and is on the cover art for this one. Dave Rokos wrote the tune, which references The Pogues’ “Fairytale of New York”. Good news: no slurs in the Gary version. We’ll have you in and out in 90 seconds. Also: say hello to the recording debut of Alisa Caruso (some backup vox at the end). 

10) Beach Slang - “Tommy In The 80s”

My most played song of 2020, but it really was more of a byproduct of how early in the year the album dropped. I’m still such a sucker for it, though. Other than forced nostalgia, not totally sure what the track is about. Did learn Beach Slang recruited former Replacements bassist Tommy Stinson to play on their LP, which was named -- /deepest of breaths -- “The Deadbeat Bang of Heartbreak City” (so maybe it has something to do with that).

9) Juice WRLD f/ Mashmello - “Come & Go”

The :55 mark. Wait until the :55 mark. When the guitar kicks in and tempo doubles, we have a real “oh, shit!” moment. I knew who Juice was when he passed but only “Liquid Dreams”. His 2020 album (“Legends Never Die”) showed us of what could have been; 55 minutes, loaded with cameos and creativity and experimentation. This song had me in its gravitational pull immediately. By the end of the year, they were using it on sports broadcasts, and it felt like a ubiquitous part of the culture.

One of my favorite days of 2020 was visiting the Juice mural in Chicago with my wife. We went impulsively during the day after someone posted a picture on Twitter.

I snapped one of my own and posted to IG with the Signals Midwest lyric “There is such quiet grace in private moments in public spaces”. The band responded with “RIP JUICE”; the perfect online exchange.

Shortly after, I was out with a different group of friends, and we went back at night. This time, it was protected by a fence you had to squeeze past. When we got through, there were kids in there smoking, taking pictures, just hanging out; empty liquor bottles lined the bottom of the mural. Even though it didn’t take all that long to make it there, it still felt like a journey and total ‘movie moment in real life’; a complete rarity in a year like 2020.

8) Mac Miller - “Good News”

Maybe I’ll lay down for a little...

Sadly continuing the theme of artists gone too soon, we have this reflective Mac Miller single, which feels more like self-eulogy than traditional rap. You feel it the entire time. The song crests with “There’s a whole lot more for me waitin’ on the other side”, and it conveys a readiness for whatever happens next.

7) The Dirty Nil - “Done With Drugs”

I don’t pray to Jesus or even own a suit

We lost the creators of our last two songs to substances, and, if we are to take this song at face value, The Dirty Nil don’t want to go down the same path. Drying out never sounded so cool and defiant... until the IKEA suggestion.

6) The Weeknd - “Blinding Lights”

Uptempo Abel is undefeated. My favorite pop song of 2020 has you feeling like you’re speeding through the empty streets of nighttime Las Vegas in a stolen car; indifferent to your environment, only tuned in to your personal desire.

And, on the lamer side of the spectrum, it spawned a catchy TikTok dance.

5) Spanish Love Songs - “Self-Destruction (As A Sensible Career Choice)”

It won’t be this bleak forever... yeah, right.

SLS has always been over-the-top with their lyrics spotlighting the hopelessness of the human condition -- so it was the *perfect* combo to being locked inside with nothing looking to forward to. Bonus: fun cake video.

Though the song’s core is uncut despair, a random moment I remember from 2020 was my wife telling me “I can hear you smiling as you’re singing” from another room as I belted the despondent chorus.

4) Worst Party Ever - “False Teeth”

This song sounds like The Front Bottoms; insecure yet so full.

3) Run The Jewels - “the ground below”

There were a lot of songs *about* 2020, but I’m not sure any artist soundtracked what being alive now is like more than RTJ. My favorite rap song and rap record of 2020.

Fav Killer Mike line: “Not a holy man, but I'm moral in my perversiveness / So I support the sex workers unionizing their services”

Fav El-P line: “I'll slap a dying child he don't pronounce my name correct”

2) The Menzingers - “America Pt. 2″

The Menzingers unexpectedly released an acoustic, re-done version of 2019′s “America (You’re Freaking Me Out)” single. It dropped on my birthday -- June 5th, 2020 -- as the rage in this country boiled over and protesters took to the streets. Though some of the lyrics remained the same, the new ones were changed with true purpose:

Well George Floyd was murdered by a cop The whole world saw the video and watched Now justice is long overdue Grab your pitchforks, we’re heading to Pennsylvania Avenue

I had nothing left when the first pre-chorus hit: “I hope the Devil and Donald and Mitch McConnell rot in hell for all tomorrows”. Tattoo this on my fucking soul.

All funds from the song were donated to Community Bail Funds (via Act Blue) & Campaign Zero. I purchased the track before hearing a note.

1) Machine Gun Kelly - “My Bloody Valentine”

Going into the year, I couldn’t tell you the difference between Machine Gun Kelly and Mac Miller -- now they’re both fixtures in this Top 10. All I really knew about MGK involved tattoos and a rap battle lost to Eminem (not that anyone ever beats Eminem).

In 2020, he took a punk/emo turn, with the services of GOAT drummer Travis Barker and new squeeze Megan Fox at his side. This song’s lyrics could potentially be cheesy but aren’t -- they all land. From the simulation going bad to not wanting “fake love” to all the damn second guessing and the earnestness that just won’t let you off the mat.

Every piece to the puzzle adds something: the messy hair, the Ken doll build, the forced iconic pink guitar that now feels actually iconic. It was almost like no one had any fun this year so he could have all of it on our behalf. There’s a half second shot of him sticking his tongue our during the pre-chorus, a joy 99.99% of us never got to feel.

The album itself was just as fantastic*; a 2000′s pop punk throwback with a Halsey duet, horrible skits (hi, Pete Davidson FaceTime), OpIvy lyrical nod (complete with a royalty check), a warp speed punk track that doesn’t even crack the minute mark, your token 6/8 ballad, acoustic closer (about his daughter), and some experimentation that leaves the new genre but still stays nearby; shades of Lil Peep, if he had Blink-182 as his backing band. Speaking of, please do not miss Travis’ fill at the 2:30 mark.

(* - named “Tickets To My Downfall”... woof)

MGK could get cancelled tomorrow, but we’ll always have this year in a bottle. The acoustic version of the song (sung in a lower resister), the 10 minute making of video (that I watched, uh, twice)... shit, he even turned it into a medley at the start of 2021.

It might be cliche to say “stay winning”, but when someone stacks this many W’s with no end in sight, what the fuck else do you call it? Real love.

* * *

Thank you so much for reading. Here is the Spotify playlist (includes 87 of the 88 songs).

[capechicago]

CAPE Network Forum Newsletter: West Chicago

In this issue of the CAPE Network Forum Newsletter, we are excited to celebrate the newest after-school partnership between CAPE and West Chicago School District 33. What began as an idea from CAPE teaching artist and resident of West Chicago, Anni Holm, has now blossomed into a robust inquiry-based arts integrated after-school program serving over 350 students and community members across four schools.

From early conversations beginning in the summer of 2020, to the navigation of complex federal and state grant management systems, to the kick-off of programming in January of 2021, this program is testament to the power of partnership in spite of the COVID-19 pandemic.

CAPE is grateful to Anni Holm for making the initial connection, District 33 leadership’s openness to expanding their after-school program, and Hannah Martin, CAPE’s West Chicago Program Coordinator, who is doing incredible work behind-the-scenes to make the whole program function. CAPE is also grateful for the incredible creativity and energies of all the West Chicago teachers, staffers, and the many new CAPE artists who have made this all possible and greatly expanded CAPE’s Network of Artist/Researchers.

Below you will find the perspectives of Joie Frankovich, District 33’s Coordinator of Partnerships, Yaritza, a fifth grade student at Currier Elementary, and documentation of in-process work from many of the online classes transpiring in West Chicago.

— Joseph Spilberg

Interview with Joie Frankovich, District 33’s Coordinator of Partnerships

Tell us the story of your relationship to CAPE and how this partnership came to fruition.

I'm the Coordinator of Partnerships with District 33. The district has had a 21st Century Community Learning Centers grant for eons, and for the last 10 years of that grant, we worked with a somewhat local partner, and they were always our applicant on it. With COVID-19, they felt that the program was no longer aligned with their mission and chose to step away from the grant. That left us needing to find a new co-applicant.

We reached out to a lot of different organizations and just tried to put feelers out there because it's a fairly hefty grant. I mean, there's a lot of red tape and a lot of requirements, and an organization needs to have capacity to do it. We actually had a lot of organizations turn us down because we were in the middle of a pandemic, and all these organizations are just doing their best to stay afloat, the same that the school district was.

Anni Holm, who I know is a CAPE teaching artist and a District 33 parent and staff member, had always raved about CAPE as an organization and the kind of the model that CAPE uses. She had sent a connecting email to Joseph and me just saying let's see if there's anything that can come from it.

So I reached out to Joseph. I just said, “You mentioned you're looking to expand your reach. You're looking to be in more suburbs. You’ve worked with 21st CCLC grants. Are you interested in being our co-applicant and seeing if we can figure something out?” And Joseph said yes immediately.

I think ISBE approved of the grant on January 18th. So in six months, we created a budget, and we put a program together. Then the program started running February 1st!

What does collaboration look like for District 33?

I think the relationship between District 33 and CAPE has already started with an intention to be collaborative from the very beginning. I remember when Joseph and I were first talking, one of the big things that I was focused on was the fact that the district still wants to work with other partners. How do we blend other organizations and people into this program?

It's just kind of this constant throwing ideas out there and saying, What makes sense? How can we work together? We've been working with a lot of our local partners to the park district, the library, some help from some of our local health partners, and finding ways to embed really collaborative family opportunities on top of the traditional kind of classroom stuff that's going to happen in the afternoon, spring, and summer programming. And it's been absolutely wonderful.

For the future, I just envision this continuing to expand and really grow, because we only really started in February with Joseph. I have been referring to this semester as our pilot, like, let's just go for it. Let's see how it goes. Let's learn lessons. And then for next year, we can really think about how we build this out even more, make it more robust.

And for us, when we talk about collaboration, a lot of times what we talk about is that often, whether it's education, nonprofit organizations, people are asked to do so much more than what they should have to do. And a lot of times it's beyond the scope of their position. Teachers are being asked to be counselors.

For us, these collaborations are really about bringing in everyone’s expertise and passions. Really work together so we can just do the things we're good at and let others do the things they're good at so that together we're really working towards those goals. CAPE has this beautiful model, inquiry based arts integration. So CAPE tells us how that looks, because you have that expertise. District 33 has some other expertise. How do we work together to create something really beautiful for students? I mean it's all about the students and families in the end. So how do we work together to create something that's really special for them? It’s been just incredible how open and ready everyone's been to just say, OK, let's figure this out. Let's be creative. Let's bounce ideas back and forth. And we just make it work. And it's pretty awesome to have a partner who's just has a bent towards wanting to operate that way.

Family Night is where the community’s families come together and share out what they’ve been learning in CAPE programs. CAPE has hosted a few Family Night events over the spring semester. How does Family Night serve the district?

Students don't exist in isolation. They are a family unit in some way, shape, or form. It looks different for everyone, but you're a part of something larger. If you want to support students, our belief is you need to be supporting the guardians or the adults or whoever else is in that home with reaching their goals and removing barriers for those folks.

We do a lot of activities and events where we try and bring families together to do shared learning or just have shared experiences together. For example, we offer ESL classes for parents and guardians. And in the evenings we know that often child care could be a hindrance for them to be able to attend. We also offer a child development program for the children of parents and ESL class where the children are doing their own learning.

The other big thing we really focus on is this idea of doing things with families and communities, not doing them to families and communities, and really providing opportunity for families to say, this is what I want this to look like, or this is how I think you should be. And not just assuming we know better because we're, I don't know, an organization or professionals or whatever.

So the Family Nights that we've had so far, it was amazing. I mean, I think I shed tears a couple of times. So cool to see and particularly knowing everything's been virtual for us this whole time. Yeah, I still see the impact that's happened in the relationships that have been built has just been phenomenal. It really gives an opportunity for parents to be able to kind of get that insider view of the program, and also a chance for students to just show off, show their parents what they did, and ask, How cool is this? And I really enjoyed being able to see the teaching artists and our district staff show off, too, because they were doing a lot of the sharing. It's just so incredible.

I think down the road, what would be amazing is that when we have these events in person, hopefully in the near future, that they also are really embedded in the community, too. So people have an opportunity to really learn more about West Chicago and the community that they live in and contribute to. So it's really supporting a broader community engagement too, not just that inner family engagement.

Student interview with Yaritza, a fifth grader at Currier Elementary School

Why did you join CAPE after school?

Because I like after school programs and theater. It's fun learning more stuff after school.

How is this after school like class and environment different than what you do during the school day?

It's different from the school day because I get to move around a lot more and play more and have more fun than just sitting there and writing notes.

Can you describe to me what kinds of things you've been doing in this class (Life Out Loud!)?

We play fun games. And we have time to spend quality time with other kids, and draw everyday. We do theater games and create stories and fun scenes. And we write some of our ideas down.

What is something that you hope to do with the class before the school year is over?

One thing that I like to do with the class before the class is over is do the puppet shows we’ve started. And learn more games.

If you were to tell someone of the kids at your school, a reason to join CAPE after school programs or this after school program, what would you say?

I like doing after school programs because it gives you more time to spend time with other kids and not be on the on your screen, and to create things on your own with artists.

At Gary Elementary School, students show off their trolls before the mischievous creatures run away, led by artists Anni Holm and Buddy Plumlee and teacher Jacqueline Neidhardt.

Students at Leman Middle School share their Alebrijes and masks inspired by traditional Mexican art, led by artist Sarita Garcia and teacher Carlos Osorio.

For the parent class at Leman Middle School, parents practice drawing still lifes using objects that represent their identity, led by artist Jessica Mueller and counselors Graciela Moreno, Lori Koch, and Melinda Ayala.

[gryffindorcls]

Meant To Be:  Chapter 4 (Your Voice)

IT’S DAY FOUR OF LOVESQUARE FLUFF WEEK 2020!!!

(I’ve come to terms with the fact that I’m a day behind.  Thanks for your patience!) Thank you @lovesquarefluffweek​ for organizing this event!

Welcome back!  Today’s prompt is “Your Voice”.

This chapter is a song fic.  I used the song “Runnin’ Home to You” from the musical episode of “The Flash”.  You can listen to it on Spotify here.

I also collabed with @flashflashitsash!  She made some STUNNING art for this chapter.  You can find it here.

Enjoy!

—

BEGINNING

<— Previous    Next —->

AO3

FanFiction

Chapter 4: Your Voice

With the tape measure in hand, Adrien stood at the other end of the table and kept his eyes glued on Marinette. His heart melted when he saw her stick out her tongue while trying to get an accurate measurement. After they finished, she smiled and bounced on the balls of her feet, causing Adrien to nearly combust.

While he watched her write down the measurements on a piece of paper, his mind began to wander. “She’s always been beautiful, but my lady is the only one who’s ever made me feel this way. What changed? Why now?”

“Adrien?” Marinette said, cutting through the haze in his brain, “Are you okay?”

He nodded. “Yeah, why?”

“You looked kind of out of it for a second there.”

“Oh, I was just...thinking.”

“Cool! I do that sometimes...ugh...wait, that was probably the dumbest thing I could have said.” She shoved the paper with the measurements into her purse. “Please just ignore me.”

“She’s adorable. Maybe Plagg is right. The heart wants what the heart wants.”

He took a step toward her. “I don’t think I could if I tried. If anything, I think I’m finally seeing you for all that you are.”

“No! What are you doing, Adrien? What about Ladybug?”

She squeaked. “Oh! I...um...d-do you see what you like? I mean...like what you see?”

“Marinette, I think I always have,” he said without thinking.

“Maybe my heart wants her.”

Marinette’s face turned bright red, and her eyes grew wide. “School...us...go?

Adrien held out his arm for her to take. “Shall we?”

“Mmmhmm.” She tentatively took his arm.

An explosion of warmth radiated throughout his body when she finally hugged his arm against her chest. For a brief and fleeting moment, all of the confusion from before melted away.

It felt familiar.

It felt safe.

It felt right.

Like the moment they’d shared in the classroom earlier that day, Adrien was struck by the strength of his feelings for Marinette. Just as he was about to let himself completely fall for her, visions of Ladybug flashed across his mind. His arms tensed involuntarily while he let out a frustrated huff.

“Is everything alright?” she asked quietly.

“Um, yeah.” He scrambled to find an answer. “I...uhh...just remembered that I have to go home before I go back to the school.”

“Oh, I can walk with you!”

“But you live right here. I don’t want you to go out of your way.”

“I don’t mind. Honestly, before I met up with you, my plan was just to go back to my room and watch YouTube videos. It’s a beautiful day, and I’d love the company.”

Adrien’s pulled his hood over his head. “You mean, you wouldn’t mind walking with someone who has to hide their identity from nosy fans?”

She giggled and pulled the strings on his sweatshirt, cinching the hood around his face. “Nope. I wouldn’t even mind if you were wearing a mask. I’d still hang out with you.”

He loosened the hood and met her gaze. “Wait...really?”

“Of course. You’re still you, no matter what you’re wearing.”

“Sounds like you have experience.”

She turned her head and coughed. “Uhhh...no m-more than you!”

“It’s getting awkward,” his mind yelled, “Change the subject!”

He tapped his chin. “I wonder if Ladybug and Chat Noir act differently when they’re civilians. Being able to hide your identity like that must give them the freedom to do things they can’t usually do.”

“No, Adrien, what are you doing?”

“Well,” Marinette began, “everyone has a tendency to act differently when they’re in different situations. It’s probably the same for Ladybug and Chat Noir. For example, I can’t imagine civilian Ladybug doing half the things she does when she’s transformed.”

“You just said that a person is still themselves no matter what they’re wearing, so even if she’s not swinging between buildings every second of the day, I’m sure she’s still brave, selfless, and creative. I bet she’s an everyday Ladybug...just like you.”

Marinette took a sharp intake of breath. “We are going to run out of time if we don’t get going.”

Adrien pulled out his phone and looked at the screen. “Yikes, you’re right. We only have an hour. Let’s go.”

As the duo made their way to the Agreste Mansion, they chatted about school, video games, and their hobbies. Even though Adrien did his best to stay away from topics that had to do with Ladybug and Chat Noir, he couldn’t help but hear his lady in Marinette’s voice. He found it amazing how both girls sounded so similar.

“I must have a really specific type,” Adrien mused inside his head.

“Hey Marinette,” he said, stopping at the wall behind his house, “why don’t we talk more? I love hearing what you have to say.”

She looked to the side and tucked a stray hair behind her ear. “Well, we usually don’t get the chance to hang out alone with each other. Most of the time we’re with Alya and Nino. And then you weren’t there for a while because you were with…”

“Kagami?”

“Yeah. I heard about you two breaking up. I’m sorry things didn’t work out.”

“It’s for the best. We were too alike.”

She let go of his arm. “Oh?”

He took a step back. “Is everything alright?”

“Yes, sorry!” she said quickly, waving her hands in front of her, “It’s just that a friend of mine said the same thing to me last night. You remind me a lot of him actually.”

“That’s interesting. You remind me of someone I know, too.”

She smiled. “What a funny coincidence!”

He nodded. “I guess you and I just have certain qualities that we look for in friends.”

“At least you don’t pun as much as he does.”

“I hate to tell you this, but I love puns.”

“You do?” Marinette laughed. “Oh, no!”

He feigned mock hurt. “Excuse me, but I think you’ll find that my jokes are quite claw-some. Why even the Queen of England liked my puns when I went to the royal wedding.”

“You told puns to the Queen? Look, I’m not against puns, they’re fine. My dad uses them, but my friend has terrible timing. I hope yours is better, Prince Charming.”

“Oh, so, I’m a prince now?”

“Only a prince could tell puns to the Queen and live to tell the tale.”

“And how would you know that? Are you a princess?”

“I’m not royalty.”

“You could be.”

“I’m just a baker’s daughter. I’m not special.”

Adrien leaned in. “Yes, you are. You’re purr-fect.”

Placing her index finger on the tip of his nose, she pushed him away. “I take back what I said before. You’re not a prince. You’re just a trusted knight who learned one too many jokes from the court jester.”

He took her hands in his. “What if I was both?”

She let go of one of his hands and ran her thumb across his cheek. “That sure would make things easier.”

He cleared his throat, let go of her other hand, and pointed to the grate on his wall. “Oh, um...we’re here, by the way.”

“Adrien, this is the back of your house.”

“Yes, it is.”

“Can you not walk in the front door?”

“No, I snuck out.”

“Oh.”

“But I’m going to go back in and try to convince Nathalie to let me walk with you to school. I think she’ll say yes. Wait for me out front, and I’ll text you if I get permission.”

She shook her head and laughed. “I guess this is where I wish you good luck?”

Adrien patted his bag. “I still carry around my Marinette lucky charm wherever I go, so I have all the luck I need!”

“You do?”

“Of course, it’s one of my most prized possessions.”

“I still have yours. It’s in a special place in my room.”

Adrien felt Plagg poke his stomach from inside his sweatshirt. When he reached inside of his pocket to make him stop, his Kwami shoved his phone into his hand.

He pulled out the phone and looked at the time. “Yikes! We only have a half-hour left. I gotta get going. Hopefully, I’ll see you in a few minutes.”

“See you soon!” She waved and made her way down the sidewalk.

Once Marinette had turned the corner, Adrien knelt down, removed the bars from the grate, and shimmied through the small opening. He ran across the garden, climbed through the window, hopped into the bathroom, and snuck back to his room.

“I guess you’re no longer in love with Ladybug.” Plagg zipped out of the sweatshirt pocket.

Adrien sighed. “I don’t know. Marinette and Ladybug are so alike. I have no idea how to choose, but at least I took your advice. She and I are going to hang out after school today.”

“Good, but what about the food you promised me.”

“Marinette’s family owns a bakery. I’ll buy you something there.”

Adrien grabbed his books, shoved them into his bag, and made his way to Nathalie’s desk.

“Yes, Adrien,” the assistant said before he could announce his presence, “What do you need?”

He fiddled with the strap on his bag. “I was wondering if I could walk to school with my friend Marinette. It’s such a nice day, and it’s not that far.”

“You know your father doesn’t like it when you’re not with your bodyguard.”

“Please, Nathalie? She’s waiting outside the front gate, and I don’t want her to have to walk back on her own.”

“Fine, but you two won’t be walking. She will come with you in the car.”

While it wasn’t what he wanted, he knew arguing wouldn’t help. “Okay.”

She pushed up her glasses with her index finger. “Is there something else you need?”

“Could I hang out with Marinette after school? It’s Friday, and I’m done with almost all my homework for the weekend.”

“You have a photoshoot in the morning.”

“I won’t be out late. I promise.”

Without responding, Nathalie stood up and walked into his father’s office. When she returned, she sat down at her desk and started typing.

“You have until seven o’clock,” she said without looking up from her computer.

A surge of excitement flooded his brain. “Thank you!”

He pulled out his phone, texted Marinette, and ran outside. When he got there, his bodyguard was opening the car door for his classmate. He quickly hopped into the other side of the vehicle.

“Sorry, we’re not walking, but this was the best I could do,” he said with a shrug.

She buckled her seatbelt. “Compromise isn’t the worst thing in the world.”

“You’re right.”

“Besides, we are running out of time. We only have twenty minutes of our lunch break left.”

“We do? I was hoping to buy something from the bakery before we headed back to class.”

“Did you not eat?”

“No, I didn’t.”

“I have to stop by my place anyway to grab my backpack and give my dad these measurements. Come in with me, and I’ll have my mom give you something from the bakery.”

“I have money.”

She crossed her arms. “And it will be useless in our store. My parents are always forcing food on my friends, and my mom would be more than happy to give you something.”

“Your parents are awesome,” he said, feeling a pang of jealousy in his gut.

“They are. They’re a little nosy, but they’re great. My parents treat all my friends like family. You know you’re welcome to come over whenever you want, right?”

“I am?”

“Yeah, I have friends over all the time.”

“That would be amazing.”

The car pulled up to the bakery, and both teens hopped out. They were greeted by two smiling faces when they walked through the door.

“Hello, Adrien!” Sabine greeted cheerfully.

“Sorry it took me so long to get the measurements.” Marinette handed the paper to her father. “I ran into Adrien, and we started talking.”

“That’s fine, sweetheart.”

“Maman, would it be okay if I grabbed a few croissants. Adrien didn’t eat any lunch.”

Marinette’s mother gasped. “Well, that won’t do! Come here, my dear, and we’ll pick out a few things.”

Adrien didn’t try to contain his excitement. “Thanks, Mrs. Cheng!”

“Anytime.”

While he looked at the case of treats, Marinette’s father spoke to her with a booming voice. “I know it’s short notice, but I’m going to need you to help me with setting up over at the venue tonight.”

“But, papa, Adrien wanted to hang out with me after school.” Marinette drooped.

Adrien couldn’t stand to see her looking upset. “I can help out if you want.”

“It’s okay. You don’t have to,” she said sadly, “We can hang out another time.”

“No, I insist. If I go home, I’d just sit around watching YouTube videos all night.”

“Okay. Thank you, Prince Charming.” She said with a curtsey.

He laughed and bowed. “Anything for you, Princess.”

***

Once again, Marinette found it impossible to focus in class. She spent the rest of the school day daydreaming of blond boys in disguise.

Nothing made sense anymore. Her heart felt like it was being stretched to opposite sides of the earth, and she didn’t know what to do.

Once school was finally over, she and Adrien made their way over to the bakery. They spent the next several hours carrying various items over to the venue. By the time they were finished, they were sweating and laughing. She never wanted their time together to end.

When Adrien finally left, Marinette sat alone with her thoughts. She did her best to focus on something other than her troubled heart, but memories of the time she spent with each boy continued to dance through her mind. She tried distracting herself by designing, watching videos, and working on homework, but nothing she did was able to calm her down. She felt restless.

Marinette climbed onto her balcony and allowed the cool breeze to caress her face. She closed her eyes and attempted to sort out her thoughts.

The time she’d spent with Adrien today was like a dream come true. It was everything that she’d ever wanted, and it seemed like he was starting to think of her as more than just a friend. At the same time, today made her realize that there were still so many things that she didn’t know about Adrien. It was as if there was a part of himself that he kept hidden from the world. The thought of getting to know that side of him excited her.

As her mind began to picture what a relationship with Adrien would look like, her thoughts wandered to Chat Noir. Last night had been proof that her love for him had always existed, and there was no question that he was deeply in love with her. However, she also knew that their job as superheroes would get in the way of them having a real relationship with each other.

“If only I knew Chat as a civilian, Tikki. That would make all of this so much easier,” she said, looking out at the Parisian skyline.

The tiny red being landed on Marinette’s shoulder. “Well, as the Guardian, you are more than welcome to…”

“Wait!” she exclaimed, cutting off her Kwami, “I think I hear something.”

Marinette closed her eyes and could just make out the faint sound of a piano playing in the distance. When her eyes landed on the park, she saw light pouring out of the gazebo in the middle of the venue.

“It’s Chat,” she whispered, “He came back, Tikki. I have to go see him!”

The kwami giggled. “Then go!”

“Tikki, SPOTS ON!” she yelled, letting the bright pink light wash over her.

She quickly unsheathed her yo-yo and swung down to the park. She landed inside the fenced-off area and quietly made her way to the gazebo. When she reached the decorated entranceway, she found Chat Noir playing the same song he’d played for her the night before.

“Hello, Chat.” She sat down next to him on the bench.

He stopped playing. “Good evening, Ladybug. It’s not a patrol night. Any purr-ticular reason you’re here?”

“I’ve had an interesting day, and I heard you playing. I was hoping you would let me listen to your song again.”

“Anything for you, my lady.”

“Thank you.”

He positioned his fingers on the keys, paused, and looked up. “Actually, I was wondering if you would indulge me for a moment.”

She nodded. “Uhh...sure?”

“There are words to the song, and I was hoping you would let me sing them for you.”

“You mean, it’s not just the melody?”

“Is it okay if I sing?”

“Oh, yes, I would love to hear the words.”

She rested her head on his shoulder, and he simply smiled and turned his attention towards the keys. When he played the first chord, her heart soared.

And then he began to sing.

“Can't say how the days will unfold,

Can't change what the future may hold.

But, I want you in it.

Every hour, every minute.”

Tears began to form in the corners of her eyes. She could feel the ache in his heart, and she suddenly longed to hold him and never let him go.

“This world can race by far too fast.

Hard to see while it's all flying past,

But it's clear now,

When you're standing here now.

I am meant to be wherever you are next to me.”

The depth of his love struck her soul. It was unlike anything she’d ever experienced before.

“All I want to do

Is come running home to you,

Come running home to you.

And all my life I promise to

Keep running home to you.

Keep running home

To you.”

She tried to picture a relationship with Chat in their civilian lives. Ladybug did her best to remove the mask from his face, but to her despair, Adrien’s face popped into her mind, reminding her of the decision she had to make.

“And I could see it,

Right from the start,

Right from the start.

That you would be

Be my light in the dark,

Light in the dark.

Oh, you gave me no other choice

But to love you.”

She was hopelessly in love with both of them, and she had no idea what to do. Tears began to flow freely down her cheeks.

“All I want to do

Is come running home to you,

Come running home to you.

And all my life I promise to

Keep running home to you,

Keep running home,

Home to you.

Can't say how the days will unfold.

Can't change what the future may hold.

But, I want you in it,

Every hour, every minute.”

When the last note faded away, they sat in a comfortable silence. They didn’t move or speak for several minutes.

She sniffled. “Thank you, Chaton.”

“No.” He shook his head. “Thank you for letting me sing.”

“It was beautiful.” She got off of the piano bench and clutched her yo-yo in her hands. “I have to go. I’ll see you tomorrow for patrol.”

Chat kept his eyes glued on the keys. “I’ll see you tomorrow, my lady.”

She threw her yo-yo and vaulted into the night. When she landed on her balcony, she detransformed, collapsed into a heap, and sobbed.

“Why couldn’t they be the same person?” she thought, before a pair of strong, familiar arms gently wrapped themselves around her.

[letterboxd]

Best of the Fests 2020.

From 17th-century werewolves to WWII gremlins to present-day nomads, the stripped-back, mostly virtual 2020 fall festivals still managed to bring the goods. Our team rounds up the very best titles we saw at TIFF, NYFF, the BFI London Film Festival and beyond.

LISTEN: Gemma Gracewood and Ella Kemp chew over their festival favorites in the latest episode of The Letterboxd Show.

Kudos to the teams at the Toronto, New York and BFI London Film Festivals for pulling excellent hybrid festivals together in extremely weird, not-at-all-ideal circumstances. From the always-excellent conversations (and Cameron Bailey’s always-excellent suits) to the hybrid options for viewing, we left feeling hope for our favorite art form.

We have been keeping track, over on our Twitter account, of the many film festivals going online, and it’s safe to say that virtual film festivals—and the wider accessibility they offer—have been a silver lining to this mostly awful year. Indeed, the 58th NYFF was one of Film at Lincoln Center’s most-attended festivals, with 70,000+ attendees in all 50 states and beyond. (We participated in a NYFF Industry Talk, along with MUBI and Rotten Tomatoes, about the future of online film conversation, moderated by Indiewire’s David Ehrlich.)

Attempting to replicate the extreme fatigue of the real thing, our festival team (Ella Kemp, Aaron Yap, Kambole Campbell, Jack Moulton and Gemma Gracewood and—helping us bridge the geo-locked divide—Canadian TIFF regular Jonathan White) disregarded international date lines and dove right in. We saw many films to love, but by consensus (and a poke around your Letterboxd reactions) these are the ones we’re still thinking about.

Lovers Rock Directed by Steve McQueen, written by McQueen and Courttia Newland. The ‘Small Axe’ anthology will be released on a weekly rollout on Amazon Prime Video beginning November 20 with ‘Mangrove’, then ‘Lovers Rock’, ‘Red, White and Blue’, ‘Alex Wheatle’ and finally ‘Education’. Seen at: NYFF, BFI London Film Festival.

Lovers Rock, the first part of Steve McQueen’s ambitious, multi-part film project Small Axe, feels like a massive stylistic departure for the filmmaker, in a manner that completely transfixes and astounds. It’s no wonder that this one turned heads at multiple festivals, as it’s immediately warmer, more freewheeling and sensual than any other McQueen work. It’s defined by a hypnotic focus on sound and touch, represented in its earliest scenes with a tactile close-up of a heated comb working its way through hair, and later with its focus on hands wrapped around shoulders, moving across shirts and dresses, people joining together and/or colliding through song and dance. Despite being made for television, it’s astounding how little Lover’s Rock feels that way. Often impressionistic and unbound to the kind of urgency or efficiency that naturally comes with having to adhere to a time-slot, it simply rests in the moment. With the seismic protests being undertaken by Black people this year, Lovers Rock feels like more than welcome respite from a hateful populace—visually rich, gorgeously soundtracked Black joy and love. Also, man, those shirts are incredible. —KC

Nomadland Written and directed by Chloé Zhao. In US theaters December 4. Seen at: TIFF, NYFF, BFI London Film Festival.

“I am already convinced that Chloé Zhao deserves the whole world,” writes Jaime of Nomadland, the TIFF People’s Choice winner. Personal security is something we don’t think about on a daily basis. We have shelter, we can buy food, anything else is bonus. But what if those two basic tenets vanish? While the global financial crisis affected all in 2008, it affected retirees more. Supposedly secure retirement investments vanished; security no more. What do you do? Survive. Zhao’s adaptation of Jessica Bruder’s 2017 non-fiction masterpiece Nomadland: Surviving America in the Twenty-First Century is a beacon of human spirit and survival. It may not be pretty, but it’s real. It’s not something to be embarrassed about, it’s something to be proud of. Those that let this happen to good, honest working people should be the ones embarrassed. —JW

Minari Written and directed by Lee Isaac Chung. No release date announced. Seen at: Middleburg Film Festival.

Minari is the medicine for these tough times. It’s a wonderful, wonderful, deeply personal, utterly serene and metaphysical portrait of America—freedom, faith, superstition, forces of nature, and ambition collide with the costs of intoxicating capitalist dreams, but not without a whole lot of heart. This is elegantly crafted, at once organic in its approach and always sweepingly cinematic. The film’s gentle sense of humor ensures that it never takes itself too seriously and allows the weight of its poetic images and juxtapositions to guide the narrative. The brilliant ensemble should grow to join Steven Yeun as household names (well, cinephile households). Youn Yuh-jung and Alan Kim are bright sparks as the latest classic duo of sassy grandma and precocious grandchild, but it’s Han Ye-ri—taking on the surrogate role of director Lee Isaac Chung’s mother—who provides an overlooked and tender sounding board for familial bonds in fraction. Minari is truly one of 2020’s most invaluable and essential pieces of art, living up to the hype built since Sundance. Korea came to the USA for the Oscars earlier this year, and if 2021 shows similar mercy, there’s a chance you’ll see this home-grown Asian-American picture mounting that stage in future. —JM

Wolfwalkers Directed by Tomm Moore and Ross Stewart, written by Will Collins with Moore and Stewart. Recently released in UK theaters; coming to Apple TV+ December 11. Seen at: TIFF, BFI London Film Festival.

The much-anticipated Cartoon Saloon adventure Wolfwalkers was met with only joy around here. A fable about what happens when a colonizing force tries to tame a wild forest, set during Oliver Cromwell’s Siege of Kilkenny, Wolfwalkers builds to “one of the most sensational animated third acts I’ve seen in years,” according to Animatedantic. The film’s themes are embedded in every hand-drawn line and stroke. “It’s not sleek and seamless and modern,” writes Cow Shea. “This is transparently a true work of art where all the work of that art is part of the finished product.” Mebh and Robyn are animated action heroes for the ages, and you’ll hear a lot about ‘Wolfvision’ in the weeks to come—for very good reason. Werewolf films have, for years, tried different ways to put us inside the beast’s mind, but Tomm Moore and Ross Stewart followed their noses and it’s as thrilling as things get. —GG

David Byrne’s American Utopia Directed by Spike Lee. On HBO and HBO Max now. Seen at: TIFF, NYFF, BFI London Film Festival.

David Byrne’s American Utopia is well on track to join Jonathan Demme’s film of another Byrne stage outing, Stop Making Sense (1984), as one of the highest-rated anythings on Letterboxd. We’re still deciding whether this film is sublime because the stage show itself is sublime, or because Spike Lee has sublimely captured the whole joyous thing for us to inject into our eyeballs, time and again, for far less than the price of a Broadway ticket. Let’s be honest: it’s due to both, and more besides. It’s a blessing upon 2020, of that we are certain. As Clint writes, “The phrase ‘this is the film we need right now’ is such a creaky cliché, but there’s an ineffable feeling that, if David Byrne and Spike Lee can’t heal the world with grey suits, bare feet, and some of the most all-encompassing works of music ever written, no one can.” As my colleague says, “will rewatch to death”. —GG

Shiva Baby Written and directed by Emma Seligman. On the festival circuit. Seen at: TIFF, LFF.

A girl walks into a shiva and bumps into her sugar daddy. What sounds like a joke sets up 77 minutes of note-perfect comedy horror in Emma Seligman’s Shiva Baby, her feature debut adapted from her dissertation short of the same name. It’s funny, horrifying, excruciating and so painfully, accurately Jewish. Isaac Feldberg calls it “cruelly hilarious about everything smothering and inevitably miserable about Jewish family gatherings”, but Seligman’s sharp eye for comedy, her affection for her teen hero Danielle (Rachel Sennott, a bona fide star) just figuring her career out and owning her sexuality (Molly Gordon playing Danielle’s overachieving ex-girlfriend Maya is a highlight) cuts straight to the core, however you relate. Matt Neglia points out how Shiva Baby “captures the behaviors of its characters with the same level of dry wit and detail as the Coen Brothers would”. What a thrill for a young, smart, Jewish, bisexual woman to be setting the pace now. Keep an eye on Seligman’s bright, bright future. —EK

Tove Directed by Zaida Bergroth, written by Eeva Putro. Released in Finland; on the festival circuit elsewhere. Seen at: TIFF.

If there was a film swoony enough to fill the Portrait of a Lady on Fire-sized hole in your heart this year, it’s Zaida Bergroth’s Tove, a bewitching biopic of Finnish author and illustrator Tove Jansson, creator of the beloved Moomin cartoon characters. Set in Helsinki during and post-World War II, the film orbits around her boho world, flitting between her creative struggles as a painter and deep sexual awakening with married theater director Vivica Bandler (Krista Kosonen). As Lillian says, “Lesbians and Moomins is such a huge fucking mood I never wanted it to end.” Alma Pöysti shines effortlessly in the lead role. “The film happens on her fantastic face,” writes Hannu. Seth agrees: “a captivating first-class drama about a world-renowned talent in search of her own identity, love and freedom.” A cozy fall-season perfection. —AY

Shadow in the Cloud Co-written and directed by Roseanne Liang. Slated for a summer 2021 release. Seen at: TIFF, AFI Fest.

A proud addition to the “she did that!” canon, the single downside of Roseanne Liang’s genre-perfect, “deliciously fearless” Midnight Madness winner Shadow in the Cloud is that there was no Midnight Madness to experience it at—but thanks to a juicy sale out of TIFF, we can look forward to a premiere next summer. Chloë Grace Moretz is Maude Garrett, a WWII pilot assigned to transport a highly classified package over the Pacific. The all-male crew of the B-17 Flying Fortress banishes her to the lower ball turret, where they harass, gaslight and leer over her—and that is nowhere near the worst part of this bonkers, non-stop hell flight, which Moretz carries like the future action hero she must now become, if the movie goddesses are listening. —GG

Pieces of a Woman Directed by Kornél Mundruczó, written by Kata Wéber. Coming soon to Netflix. Seen at: TIFF, NYFF.

You will be hearing a lot about Vanessa Kirby in the months to come. Pieces of a Woman is an arresting, often taxing watch, but few actors have delivered a performance as utterly overwhelming as Kirby portraying Martha, a grieving mother processing the loss of her baby. The filmmaking team (Mundruczo and Weber share a “film by” credit) zoom in on deep, jagged pain, and tease out some of the most affecting moments put to screen this year. Jack calls the film “an intensely intimate depiction of mental and marital deterioration caused by tragedy” and nods to master Howard Shore’s “subtle yet potent” score. It’s poetry in motion, with stunning turns from Shia LaBeouf, Ellen Burstyn, Sarah Snook and Benny Safdie also. But proceed with caution: “this film will destroy you”, Alisha Tabilin warns. —EK

Underplayed Directed by Stacey Lee. On the festival circuit. Seen at: TIFF. (Also recommended in our music movies round-up.)

Women-in-the-workplace movies aren’t usually this banging. Stacey Lee’s documentary Underplayed focuses on one corner of the still wildly sexist music industry—the dance-music scene—and lays out both the facts and feelings regarding why women still, always, deserve better. A number of key names guide the story—Rezz, Alison Wonderland, Nervo, TokiMonsta—giving the viewer a taste of what we’re missing out on while booking the same old men, over and over. And it’s not just because of the stats or the injustices that this is a must-watch: in times of limited social interaction and when the feeling of an adrenaline-fuelled crowd feels like a foggy memory, Lee captures some truly electric moments of these women thriving, captivating thousands of music lovers at once. “Buy yourself good speakers and turn them up because this movie is fun and it deserves it,” writes Matt Brown, and he’s absolutely correct. Underplayed is essential and exciting. The most entertaining education of the year. —EK

Another Round Directed by Thomas Vinterburg, written by Vinterburg and Tobias Lindholm. Awaiting new UK date due to lockdown. In US cinemas soon. Seen at: TIFF, LFF.

Another Round reunites filmmaker Thomas Vinterberg with his muse Mads Mikkelsen, in a lads-on-tour buddy movie, except the lads are four middle-aged high-school teachers, and the tour features a very casual, very constant level of intoxication each man commits to in the name of a social experiment. What could possibly go wrong, you ask? Plenty, naturally—but Vinterberg marries the slapstick moments of bumbling drunks falling over themselves with more mature, poignant scenes that question just how far you can or should go to feel that little bit more alive. There’s a lot to love here, but if we’re being very precise, it’s “rock-solid proof that Mads Mikkelsen is one of our greatest actors,” says Karen Han. Come for the wise, contemplative study of youth and spontaneity, stay for rock-solid proof that Mads Mikkelsen is also, somehow, one of our greatest contemporary dancers. —EK

One Night in Miami Directed by Regina King, adapted by Kemp Powers from his own stage play. In select US theaters December 25, coming to Amazon Prime Video January 15, 2021. Seen at: TIFF, NYFF.

Ladies and gentleman, Regina King has arrived. The actor wastes nothing in her feature directorial debut, bringing to the screen Kemp Powers’ vivid stage play of the same name with a heavyweight cast of greats. Kingsley Ben-Adir, Eli Goree, Aldis Hodge and Leslie Odom Jr. are Malcolm X, Cassius Clay (before he took the name Muhammad Ali), Jim Brown and Sam Cooke respectively, as the four men celebrate Clay’s victory over Sonny Liston in February 1964, during One Night in Miami. Rachel Wagner notes how “they all feel like friends and have chemistry, but each with a unique perspective”. This chemistry comes from King’s perfect alchemy of mood, design and structure; she lets her men speak, but her voice is never lost. “Queen King never wavers on her vision until every bit of flesh is torn off each man,” Ben notes, admiring a film that shines for all its famous faces, but stands the test of time for its rich, piercing empathy for every other one waiting in the shadows. —EK

Supernova Written and directed by Harry Macqueen. Awaiting UK and Ireland release due to lockdown; in select US theaters January 29, 2021. Seen at: BFI London Film Festival.

Colin Firth at his very best, Stanley Tucci losing his grip on himself, the luscious Lake District and endless cozy, delicious, warm knitwear. Supernova is every bit as beautiful as it sounds, but also packs a major punch when it comes to mapping a lifelong love story, and the cost of loyalty and pride when you’re fighting against pain nobody can control. As Sam and Tusker, devoted to one another for decades, come to terms with Tusker’s diagnosis of early on-set dementia, there is as much care and sadness as is to be expected, but it still feels brand new and cuts deep. Every good love story is its own. Director Harry Macqueen and his two shining stars understand this better than anyone. —EK

French Exit Directed by Azazel Jacobs, written by Patrick DeWitt. Scheduled for US release January 21, 2021. Seen at NYFF.

Armed with acerbic wit and sharpened claws, Michelle Pfeiffer delivers a vulnerable close-to-career-best performance in French Exit as a mother free-falling from wealth and reconciling with her son, an expertly cold Lucas Hedges. What appears to be formal and dry (“rich white-people stuff”, blegh) is actually wonderfully weird and surprisingly spiritual. There’s a divisive scene at the half-way point that instantly unroots the movie from any grounding we assumed it had established. In any other film, it would open up an entire world of possibilities, but French Exit decidedly treats it as matter-of-fact in order to focus on the emotional journey. It’s the decisive moment—you’re on its wavelength, or you’re overboard—and the rewards for staying aboard are plentiful. Patrick DeWitt’s adaptation of his own novel is in good hands with director Azazel Jacobs. —JM

Still Processing Directed by Sophy Romvari. On the festival circuit. Seen at: TIFF.

A final, honorable mention for Sophy Romvari’s Still Processing, the highest-rated short film out of TIFF, and an excavation of grief like no other. “You’ve got to watch this one twice,” writes Martyn. “First viewing to just weep every two to three minutes. Second viewing to really appreciate how great it is.”

[oh-phineas]

Emma’s 2020 Questionnaire! 

Your Name: Emma Characters: Phineas Flynn, Tiana Truitt, Aquata Triton, Henry Charming, Evelyn Deavor Pick one of your characters and talk about their growth (we recommend choosing an older character, but it’s up to you!) What about their story has surprised you? What are you proud of? How have they changed from their original inception to now? I’m going to talk about Phineas because I’ve had him for the longest and I think he’s the one I’ve been able to spend the most time developing. So basically something I struggled with when I first picked up Phineas was how he deals with people he doesn’t like, because in the show I don’t think he really dislikes anyone. And I feel like this drama with Tony recently has finally helped me crack what Phineas’s deal is when it comes to conflict-- he doesn’t really feel down about it unless he feels like his character is being questioned, and that’s why with Wilbur he’s mostly like whatever while with Tony and Lock (in the past) Phineas has gotten petty and vindictive-- he doesn’t like the role he’s found himself in and he takes that personally if that makes sense. (Also Phineas just way prioritizes his job with Cornelius over getting back at Wilbur, even if he’ll make the occasional jab at Wilbur in Among Us or on Twitter). So that’s been really cool to explore. And I think he’s also gotten a little less finance-bro-y than I originally intended, but I think that side of him will definitely come out once he graduates and goes to uni. I think the thing I’m most proud of with him is kind of maintaining that balance between being totally likeable and fun while also pretty infuriating and obtuse, like he’s a sweet and well-meaning person who’s also really annoying and idk I think I do that balance well.

Pick another character (or the same character if you only have one) and talk a little about where you WANT them to go. What are your plans for them going into the new year? I’m really excited to see where Tiana goes! Ever since I picked her up, I’ve been focused on this goal of getting the restaurant to happen and now that I’ve done that, there are a lot of possibilities. I want to see Tiana burn out from the stress a little bit-- maybe take on more than she can handle because a big part of her arc has been learning to accept help and collaborate with people, and I got to do that a lot with planning Tiana’s Place, but I would also really like to see that continue because those tendencies don’t really go away. I also want LOVE for Tiana even though I keep saying she doesn’t have time for it-- I want her to get a stupid crush that distracts her from work lol I think it could be really fun. And I’m also really excited to keep developing all her friendships, I love all of her Swynlake native connections and PRINCESS HOUSE and other small business owners and now that she really feels like she has put down roots with her restaurant, I want to see her branching out more.

Pick a thread or a plot that you’re proud of and talk about why you loved it. In terms of your own writing, identify 1-3 strengths and talk about why you think it’s one of your strengths. Ok sorry to keep talking about Tiana I promise I have other characters but I’m really proud of all of the different characters I incorporated into the Tiana’s Place opening. My goal was to make a real community effort to show that, no matter how much she wanted to do it on her own, she still has a whole group of people supporting her and who have a stake in it-- from Nuka and Ratigan in the beginning with the financial stuff to Clara and Toulouse and Laszlo with the music/art to Jun and Al for business advice to all the people who donated to the raffle. And the raffle was so fun and I hope people use that for plots!!

I also gotta shout out one more: writing the pirates AU Phineas and Ferb stuff was so much fun and really pushed me as a writer I think. I was a little uneasy going into pirates because action/movement/fights are not my strong suit and I knew there would be a lot of that. But the generated stuff was really helpful in kickstarting some ideas and Sid was so great to work with on that. I thought we got really creative and personally I had so much fun and I hope other people did too. 

In terms of strengths for my writing-- I think I’m good with flaws? Like even characters who are really sweet and nice (I’m looking at you Henry) I think I try to show the different sides of them and explore how you can be both really well-meaning and really misguided at the same time. And I think that’s good because it has the potential to cause conflict and drive forward more plots where there’s no clear ~bad guy~ just flawed people trying their best and that’s the most interesting stuff to me. Of course I also love big bads! I think macro plots are really important. I think my niche though is those petty little conflicts and I think I do a good job with them. 

I’m adding another too because you know what why not. I think I've gotten pretty creative recently?? Like I’ve done some really weird fun stuff this year-- Henry and Jake’s acapella audition is up there as one of my favorite threads, and I’m really excited about Tiana and Aurora’s fake date and Greg and Q doing Santa’s Workshop and I think Henry’s first open was one of my favorite opens I’ve done. Idk I think one of my insecurities about RP has always been that I worry I don’t bring enough ideas to the table with plotting and I think I’m getting better at letting my brain dream up weird cool stuff.

In terms of your own writing, identify 1-3 areas of improvement.

Like I said, plotting is still something I struggle with-- I spent the majority of my early RP experience in a very gif-chat-heavy open-heavy fly-by-the-seat-of-your-pants rp, so coming to BDRP even back during round 1 in 2017, plotting was a big surprise to me. And this is also something that I struggle with in my non-RP writing-- story arc and structure is something I have always wanted to improve. But I think I’m getting better at fleshing out ideas and not putting too much pressure on myself. And I think I’m also getting better at stepping out of my comfort zone and messaging people I don’t write with as often which is important because literally everyone here is so fun and talented! So I want to keep doing that. I know I can be a little shy sometimes (this sounds SO weird I never shut up lol but it’s how I feel) and I don’t want that to hold me back

In terms of actual writing stuff, I’d like to expand my vocabulary a bit more? I think I use certain words and phrasing so often that it annoys me and maybe it annoys no one else and my writing will be worse if I try to throw in unnecessary words but yeah. I think reading more will help with that. And in general I just really want to get better at thinking stuff through and building story arcs. 

Pick one of your plots, or even just a character, and come up with a list of 3-5 “mentor texts” where you can look for inspiration or research, then write a short (2-4 sentences) why you picked those texts. (They don’t have to be books, either!)

Ev is the one I feel like I need to do the most development on so here goes!

1. Red White and Royal Blue by Casey McQuiston, specifically the character Nora

Messy nerd girls! Messy nerd girls! Please recommend me more things with messy nerd girls! Nora is basically Ev’s exterior, the person people know her as. She’s chaotic and fun and relatable, and also kind of a genius.

2. Macbeth, specifically the character Lady Macbeth

This is one I wanna dive into! I’ve seen a heavily abridged version of Macbeth and that’s about it but I have a copy sitting on my desk. I love a villain who likes to stay behind the scenes and pull the strings, and while Ev is in this for “moral reasons” (lol) she’s also in this for #power. I’m not used to playing manipulative villains-- I’m usually more of a henchperson type deal, so the ultimate 4-D chess gal would be some good inspo.

3. Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone, specifically Professor Quirrell.

Ok I am really sorry to bring Harry Potter into this but I think something that’s important about Ev is that one of the things distracting from her villainy is her vague air of incompetency. We know she’s very smart and she has the whole nutty-professor thing going, but she’s kind of a mess and I want characters to underestimate her. I think Quirrell’s vibe of being nervous about everything is similar to Ev’s messy exterior and I would love a good end-of-the-book villain reveal.  And now, a wishlist! Jot down a few themes or stories or genres etc that you want to maybe pursue in the upcoming year! (i.e. a good ol’ fashion forbidden romance, maybe you want to dig deep into racial identity etc) This doesn’t have to necessarily be attached to any characters or stories you have now– it’s just meant to help you see for yourself what kind of stories call to your heart.

Oooh so many things. Generally more romance-- I always hesitate a little with shipping IDK WHY maybe it’s insecurity about jumping into what always feels like a bit plot to me lol. But I wanna take that plunge more-- especially with Tiana! But I’m pretty much open to stuff with anyone, especially really silly rom-com type stuff. I also think that my shipping niche is super complicated stuff with villains (the irony and craziness of the Henleigh situation is so FASCINATING and FUN and I want MORE OF THAT) so just saying a I’m-flirting-with-you-because-you’re-a-good-ally-to-have-on-my-side-oh-no-I’m-actually-falling-for-you thing with Ev could be really fun (LISTEN her entire tag is just shipping content. I scroll through so much of it so of course it gave me some ideas)

I’m also REALLY jazzed about the uni stuff going on right now. Like I’ve said before, I think college is a really interesting place and so much weird shit happens there because you have all these 18-22 year olds living in close quarters and they come up with weird ways to entertain themselves. The secret santa/RA stuff has me loling every day and I just love stuff like that. Like, I’d love to have shenanigans like people sneaking into dorms and staying up until 3 am in the library and all that stuff. I just love that stuff.

Also I am really trying to do big bad stuff with Ev!! As I have mentioned... plotting and story arcs are a major thing I’m trying to work on, so it’s a lot to think about, but I would really just love to do all kinds of things-- I’d love to have her enable small-time villains, or manipulate people who are easily swayed, or to trick people. It’s a new area for me, but it’s something I’m excited about and I want to challenge myself.

OPTIONAL: Why do you RP?

Because I literally can’t stop apparently lol. No but the thing I love about RP is getting to collaborate on a story and getting surprised by people, getting to geek out about something that I can also participate in, and having NO RULES. I think there’s something really special about having an interest that I can’t monetize or market, that I can do for pure fun out of my love of creating and writing. And I love having a community of people on the ride with me. It’s so much fun and I’m so grateful for you guys!

I always end with a gif so here’s my favorite gif it legit makes me laugh out loud