#123 eyes on me during meetings and stuff

[trains-boy]

Guys please listen

Kunikida has one of those prize boxes that teachers let students pick from if they're doing well

But at the ada

Whenever a member is doing well he'll give them a little ticket that says "Kunikida prize box" and their name

And they can trade the tickets for prizes

The prizes are basic things like fidgets, colored pencils, crayons, ect

He hides the box and some of the members (COUGH COUGH DAZAI AND RANPO) know where he hides the box, but they don't steal from it because Kunikida checks the box at the start and end of the day to count everything

[dollfaced-erin]

𝔻𝕣𝕒𝕘𝕠𝕟'𝕤 ℂ𝕣𝕒𝕕𝕝𝕖 (Blade x F!Reader x Jing Yuan)

PART 17

PART 1 , PART 2 , PART 3 , PART 4 , PART 5 , PART 6 , PART 7 , PART 8 , PART 9 , PART 10 , PART 11 , PART 12 , PART 13 , PART 14 , PART 15 , PART 16

A/n :

i have JUST finished Penacony, and i have to say, THAT WAS A WILD RIDE FR HELP ?!?! i did NOT expect it to end that way. Okok, hear me out, you might cancel me or whatever, but opinions are opinions right, and i LOVE how they made Sparkle some little gremlin that REALLY knows how to flame people good. ye ye i know about the things happening on twitter, but push that aside. that's merely a reference. all in all, the races in the game still dont exist. and getting mad at a fictional VILLAIN is somewhat hilarious to me ngl...i never even SAW the racism until i watched tiktok. my eyes. anything on tiktok is like...corrupting my brain rn and i hope your fyps are favoring you all too ! But still. We're all humans and we all have our opinions. so dont start messing around and bullshitting people online youre never gonna meet, okay ?

Taglist : -

@rebeccawinters , @nayukiyukihira , @pix-stuff , @fluffy-koalala , @swivy123 , @starxao , @kaoyamamegami , @kimura-uzuri , @rsvye , @seikouryuu , @just-here-reading , @matsulovesyou, @sincerely-aaronette , @prettyliliy , @chibiduck , @hermosacolibri , @la-diablas-thingz , @farelady-fate , @everi-eve , @shadowfoxey , @helloyuki , @immahuman , @samptlay , @boomie-123

Back then, he was only a young man, staring up at the starskiffs that flew by in the sky. He looked no older than a mere teen, but as a Xianzhou native, looks are VERY deceiving. Even for someone as young as Jing Yuan.

The young man looked up at the sky, his adolescence was only peaking up back then. But even so, he was a splendid Cloud Knight, already the climbing up the ranks to be a Sword Champion like his master. Though she had shielded him from much the horrors she had faced when she was a mere child, she tried her best to raise her student as her very own.

He remembered seeing his friends earlier, during the crowning of Jingliu as the Legendary Sword Master, entitling her with the nickname transcendent flash due to her movements that had seemingly cut through time and space within a blink of an eye. They all came around, wanting to congratulate her.

There was the legendary craftsmen, though hailing from another land and being a short-lived species, he had come to present to her the sword made of alien material, shining ebony matte black even under the bright sun. And not far behind him, was the Imbibator Lunae, coming over adorned with his robes of silk and jewelry of jade. Then, there was the mischievous Baiheng who roamed across the stars and set to stay on the Luofu.

But clinging to the sleeve of the High Elder of the Xianzhou Luofu, like a little lost girl, though he was sure that she was most likely just a couple decades younger than the Imbibator Lunae himself. And with the glaucous horns perched atop her head, he knew that she was inevitably the relative of this royal dragon before him, the one they called Saltator Lunae.

She was a beautiful young woman, with bright, curious (e/c) eyes that shone with wonder for the world. Her silky (h/c) hair was held up with a beautiful hairpin made of glass that seemed to be sturdier than plain ceramic he saw the nobles wear. But it matched her innocent look, and it seemed to him that she had yet to see more of the outside world.

He saw her for a mere glimpse, and she seemed to be talking to either her brother, or Yingxing the craftsman who seemed to be very much absorbed into his conversation with her. The middle-aged man even seemed to adore the young woman.

'Cute...' he remembered thinking as he saw her.

It was hot that day, and he was just fresh after training. But after remembering his master's swordsmanship, he quickly got back up, grabbing the sword he used to train, and went on with his practice. There was still much to learn, much to face before he could even dream of being half the person his master was.

"Jing Yuan, meet Imbibator Lunae's younger sister. Saltator Lunae." Jingliu said, appearing seemingly out of nowhere, as he was in the middle of training.

And he saw her again, from a much closer distance. The pretty girl from the other day, this time with an intricate hand fan in her hold, closed. This time she seemed much more...reserved ? Was it because her brother wasn't around ?

"Huh ? Sister ?"

"Yes, she'll be training with you. Other than Cloudhymn magic, she wants to learn about forming wind and water together to form ice. It doesn't hurt to learn more, especially from someone with core differences like you, Jing Yuan."

"Ah..." sighed the General as he shook his head, pulling himself out of his thoughts. He chuckled softly, looking at the item in his hand, which was a small decorative hand fan.

It was a beautiful oriental fan, with intricate designs carefully inked and dyed with care and professional handling. And it was no ordinary fan, instead it was a beautiful silk fan that he had seen her hold on the day they first met....

And was entrusted to him by Dan Feng who loved his sister very much before he had to part from this world.

The fan just...was just a reminder of what sunny days he blindly lived through, never anticipating the position he'd assume current day...

"General ?" A young voice piped up, snapping him out of his dampened mood.

The General turned to see his retainer by his side, peering cautiously at the fan in his master's hand, knowing that it must've belonged to someone of position and status. Especially since the wood forming it was no ordinary slice, but rather elaborately detailed to the smallest feature.

"Yes, Yanqing ?" He responded back, the lazy cat-grin on his lips as his golden eyes met one he considered his son.

"Lady Fu Xuan has given signal that she has deployed the anomaly team towards the suspected location of the Plagues Author's devotees." Yanqing said, the young boy nodding his head to signal to his master something.

"Thank you, Yanqing. It is time for me to depart, and reunite with the princess herself face to face. I cannot have the Ace of the deck be pulled out before its time." Jing Yuan said as he placed the fan onto the table, and rose to his feet.

"An...ace of the deck...?" Yanqing asked, cocking up an eyebrow as he suspiciously eyed the General of the Xianzhou Luofu.

"Yes. One of the keys in saving the Xianzhou itself." Jing Yuan said, giving no room for his retainer to further impose on his agenda.

"Now, Yanqing. I will be leaving to coincide with the Master Diviner's troupes, and those stationed in the Alchemy Commission." Jing Yuan said with that same smirk plastered on his lips.

"Do not lay your foot in a trap laid down by yourself, lest you be the hunted instead of the hunter." Was Jing Yuan's final warning before he walked off to leave the Seat of Divine Foresight.

But what he didn't know was that his little apprentice had been exposed to the sights of the legendary without either of them noticing it. And this youngling was very much eager to try his new profound knowledge in bringing justice to the land he served.

Though the General had yet just finished another meeting with the Master Diviner, even issued her with the official warrant to temporarily command the Cloud Knights, it was clear that things were far from over now. Affairs on the Xianzhou Luofu this time wouldn't be so easily averted, not with the interference of outsider hands in this matter.

He shook his head as he remembered the contents of the earlier discussion with Fu Xuan earlier. He remembered the troubled face of (Y/n) who had not dared utter a word as he issued another errand for the Astral express team to run.

He remembered his own words, spoken with his regular slyness and his lax tone in order to conceal what he truly felt inside...

"Miss Tingyun, I would like you to continue to serve as a guide for our Astral friends. And Lady (Y/n)..." he said, trailing off as he turned to look at her.

She looked...troubled. Biting her lower lip was a habit she had built long back during the prime era of the High-Cloud Quintet. Not only did she look troubled, she also seemed quite...saddened. Perhaps...it was the memories that surged her, or even the weight of her duties to reseal the Ambrosial Arbor. And everyone knows that...Lady (Y/n) isn't quite complete in herself...

"I hope you understand the importance of your presence within this mission. I am sure that the team will be able to safely escort you through the paths, and guide you safely to the Alchemy Commission."

He had once again broken the rules and regulations of the Luofu. With the next task he issued...was to get the Astral Express team towards the Ambrosial Arbor through the Alchemy Commission's delve. It was a hard decision, knowing the routes they needed to pass through were heavily infested and affected by the growth of the Ambrosial Arbor and it would be increasingly dangerous for (Y/n) to continue venturing along.

But he had no other choice yet in this matter. She was the King piece in this chessboard. Though her Queen piece...was nowhere in sight.

But he knew that man would appear sooner or later. Along with the young prince, who served the missing half of the current king's severed power.

He just hoped she was faring well.

"Phew ! That deer sure was a tough one !" March said, a relieved smile on her lips after the team had departed from the Alchemy Commission and saying good by to a certain...Furnace Master.

"Quite a deer friend indeed." Replied her companion, Stelle, who earned a tired groan from March due to her pathetic excuse of making jokes.

"But Lady (Y/n)..." March said, looking at the woman who was walking ahead of them, her back turned towards the team. Robes of expensive silk fluttered in the wind behind her, light shining off the material. Her (h/c) swayed in the wind, giving off nothing but an air of royalty.

But despite her ice cold gaze...everyone saw how shocked she looked when Gongshu had introduced himself as the Furnace of Creation's master. The woman was silent, merely staring at the man before her, uttering not a word. But she bit her lip, as a way to prevent herself from saying more than she should.

Then there was the deer, the Ebon Deer that was nothing but an abomination. Colors of blue, gold and green, representing life, vitality and wealth. A beautiful yet horrifying mix of colors forever ingrained in her mind.

"Are you alright, Lady (Y/n) ?" Welt asked, making sure that the young woman behind her was faring well.

Fighting against the Ebon Deer was hard work, at it seemed that even (Y/n) had trouble against it before they dispelled the outer source of power it was extracting from the power of Abundance.

He watched her horrified reaction as it withered and yet regained its former state, almost as if she were haunted by the extremes of power an Aeon can possess...

Or perhaps were those the same eyes of the people who fought in the War of Abundance...? The eyes that witnessed fear and loss time and time again. Maybe...perhaps even those eyes were included in the horrors of the abominations.

Powers of the Vidyadhara were nothing short of the definition of power itself, but she struggled to face it off, as if having second thoughts while fighting, or even extending the period of fighting just to conduct a couple observations and conclude a couple thoughts.

This woman...was trying to learn something. Gain an insight, perhaps...?

Even as Welt was making his own observations and conclusions regarding the change of paths from the Abundance to the Hunt, (Y/n) stood away from them, deep in her own circle of thought.

"I...am alright." Said the regal lady, dusting of the sleeves of her dress. It was tough, but she knew there was more to come, especially with the warning Jing Yuan had discretely yet undoubtedly been trying to relay to her.

Her presence was playing a crucial part in this play of his.

Did that mean...she had to meet...his reincarnation...?

Jing Yuan had never told her what had become past the period of molting rebirth. But did she really want to know...?

"It's just...that deer..." she said softly, shaking her head. "Reminded me of someone."

The man she loved, falling at the hand of the abundance, due to some...forbidden ritual they were trying to pursue. And he too...began one of the Abundance. Healing time after time, without even having a say in his own life.

The woman looked back to meet the gaze of her worried companions. All sorts of gazes landed on her form, pity, worry, concern, understanding...she appreciated them all, but...

"That's enough. We should keep going. The Alchemy Commission...shouldn't be far from here now..." said the dragon lady before she turned on her heel to leave the scene.

Right...there was no need to say anymore. Words...could not convey the feeling of loss she felt etched deep inside her heart. Nor did the memories even fulfil the void that grew day by day, with a certain longing for times of old to resurge...

Through the gates of the Artisanship Commission, it led the team straight towards the Alchemy Commission, a delve where all the medicinal and healing practices were carried out. It was the perfect place for concocting medicines out of herbs and materials of rare items to treat unknown diseases, or a place to jot down prescription after prescription while attending to the endless stream of natives that need the attention of professionals.

Some came here to learn, and some came here to help others. But ultimately, the desire of all here was one, to make the Xianzhou Luofu more prosperous and longevous than it ever was.

But this place...was also the same place for dubious plans to be carried out. With the high-tech equipment, materials only those in the alchemy would be able to obtain, should the Luofu fall into peril, this...would no doubt be their lair.

(Y/n) led the team into the commission, walking past the walls that were once so familiar to her. Though it has been centuries, this place...was almost as same as it used to be back when she was in her prime, looking over the apprentices like a protective mother watching her eggs.

Bodies of the mara-struck, celestial bodies and the Cloud Knights littered the stone ground left and right, for as far as the eye can see. It was no doubt that a fierce war had indeed taken place within these walls, no time to reach out for help since the delve had been sealed off, and the commission was deemed to be deserted.

"Whoa, looks like the battle here was intense..." March said, the poor girl looking around the blood-bathed battlefield with fear and horror in her young eyes. Her hands were to her mouth, almost in disbelief with what had occurred here.

Tingyun sighed, looking behind her to meet the gaze of the young girl. "Looks like the Master Diviner had launched a campaign while we were delayed in the Artisanship Commission."

"She must've divined it at the right time..." responded the usually silent Stelle, only ever opening her mouth to let out the most unheard of jokes (Y/n)'s pointed ears had heard of, or to say something incredibly out of character.

"Seems like she had sent in the Cloud Knights to clear out the way before we arrived. It would've been dreadfully dangerous had she let us in without proper preparation and training like the knights." (Y/n) said, her sharp and luminescent eyes scanning the area, the scene before her like flowers wilted on the ground.

But this...was nothing compared to the flooding blood rivers she had witnessed as a young maiden. Should things continue as they are...well...the Luofu would be drenched in mixed blood once again.

But unlike last time. She would do everything in her power to stop from memories of the past haunt and overshadow her future, refusing it to take shape it once took form as.

She wouldn't dare dream of losing another person dear to her.

Not the warm and kind-hearted General that had embraced her with loving arms the moment her eyes had revealed itself to the world. Not when she had to let go of her lover that remembered so little of her yet yearned for their long lost intimate moments.

Back then...she had so much to lose. And this time was no different.

She just hoped...that his reincarnation was doing well somewhere.

Welt noticed the unease in (Y/n)'s gaze. Being the attentive man he was, riddled with experience and written with history of a distant land, he knew better than to outright voice his concern over the Dragon Lady.

"Time is of the essence. The most important task for the Xianzhou Luofu is suppressing the Stellaron." Said the brunette, his arms crossing over his chest as he too observed the concluded battlefield before him. "General Jing Yuan tasked the Master Diviner with commanding the Cloud Knights-- he would've known she'd act on the results of her divination."

"Maybe that's why they sent us through the Artisanship Commission. To avoid direct contact with the battlefield. It is too dangerous for us here. If fighting the Ebon Deer was already breaking more than our usual threshold, imagine actually engaging in a real battle." (Y/n) said softly, looking sad at the loss before her.

"But...that's out of your scope." She whispered, walking towards one of the knights to check on their conditions.

"Lady (Y/n)..." March said worriedly, and Tingyun looked a little...somber at the Dragon Lady had returned back to her post as the Miracle Healer.

"This...must be hard for Lady (Y/n) to see." Tingyun said softly, shaking her head. "As I remember records...the past Dragon Lady was someone of immense caliber and knowledge, having pulled strings no one dared to interfere with."

"But this is nothing compared to what she had seen back in her days. Centuries ago, an Emanator of Abundance besieged the Luofu with the aim of the Ambrosial Arbor. They destroyed half our delves and killed most of the Cloud Knights." Tingyun said, looking up at the sky, perhaps wondering what the sky looked like when the ground was bathed in red.

"For long-life species, such events are more like yesterday's memories rather than ancient history. This awful spectacle is child's play in comparison to what they've seen and been through."

"It's...hard to tell if the Master Diviner won or lost here." Welt said with a heavy sigh, that was until (Y/n) walked back, her (e/c) clouded with regret and shame.

"There...are many losses here. I might be able to restore and patch some up, but...it would be too dangerous for me to venture further alone without back up." (Y/n) said, her eyes never leaving the fallen soldiers. "If only Yingxing and..."

She cut herself short, her thoughts snapping back to prevent herself from saying anymore of those forsaken memories of old. She shook her head and cleared her throat, as if to regain composure.

"Nevermind." She said sharply. "There aren't many Cloud Knights here, so I reckon there's a retreat nearby, or maybe they really did make it out with a minimal count of casualties. Deeper into the delve, perhaps."

"Will you try heal those here, Lady (Y/n) ?" Tingyun asked the horned woman before her, noticing her determined gaze. And (Y/n) nodded. "I'll...try my best. I'm a healer, a doctor even, or whoever I used to be, but I'm not miracle granter."

"Please be careful, Lady (Y/n), Stelle. These monsters seem pretty tough..." March warned carefully, fearing the safety of her companions and the lady they were meant to escort safely.

(Y/n) leaned down to inspect the wounds on one of the soldiers that seemed to have been ridden with mara, rooted deep inside its body. As she scanned the figure with her sharp eyes, she noticed how this individual...a woman, perhaps in her early 300s...was far too deep in mara.

Mara was plaguing her body like flies eating away at rotting flesh. Slow, constant, but unbearable. The wounds were shrinking away beyond a usual native's ability, and with the lack of injured vital signs, (Y/n) knew it was best for her to try freeze the cores and quickly move away.

So that was as she did. To those still blessed with life, she leaned down to bestow them the gift of her healing, hoping that they would be able to be to at least endure less pain than they should. She even froze cores, wishing that it was enough to prevent the rapid outbreak of the plague, harming others beyond control.

She knew...those mara struck before her...had their regrets and their ambitions to see another day. She knew another person who was just the same, bringing flesh of a fallen Emanator, striking his beloved with a fatal blow, yet he himself was a victim to another's plan who wished to deny the cruel nature of death.

The beloved who once held her hand so tenderly, an arrogant man who was yet so soft towards her, bestowing her with a gentle kiss on her forehead as he held her close by her waist.

(Y/n) looked up, knowing that those days were no more, and the sky above them...was never a witness to the moments she held dear to her frozen and recovering heart. Her heart that was facing conflict and turmoil with her current identity and her past self, knowing both were nonetheless one of the same.

Though she had forgotten most of her past, only bits and shred able to be brought forward to her current time, she knew it was time for her to step up and once again place the crown high on her head, though it weighed so heavily on her shoulders.

"Look ! There's someone over there." March called out, taking (Y/n)'s hand to point towards a woman wearing an Alchemy Commission uniform, and a kneeling Cloud Knight by her feet.

(Y/n) didn't have a good feeling about this.

[hashire]

a rivamika fic masterlist

Before I start, I feel it's necessary to say that I am a filthy multishipper. If you think this makes me a fake fan, please allow me to suggest that you move along. If not, please feel free to stay. Thank you.

So, here we go. A masterlist of all of my rivamika fics, ordered by rating and then by date. I've bolded the ones that I particularly like or think I did a good job on (lol). Enjoy.

gen

among the teacups: The tenure of Miss Mikasa Ackerman as housekeeper in Ackerman Manor. [AU, my first (posted) rivamika fic; I commissioned art for my favorite part, which I must add is near the end and doesn't represent the content of the whole fic.]

of restless nights: In which the twins wake up in the middle of the night. [Post-canon-ish gen fluff drabble.]

a moment's surrender: Eren leaves, Mikasa flounders, and things change. [Canon divergence meant to be a standalone fic, but I was encouraged to continue and...haven't because I can't write longfic. Permanent hiatus.]

teen+

hickeys: She sits in his lap in the late afternoons, running her fingers through his hair. He nuzzles her jaw, kisses her throat, leaves marks on her skin. [AU, suggestive themes but not explicit.]

in the morning light: The sound of birds wakes her. It’s one of those rare days off: for morale and to rest before an expedition. It’s been far too long to wake up without an alarm blasting at her.

She shuts her eyes and starts to doze again when something tickles her ankle. Reflexively, her leg jerks to knock whatever it is away. Before it can connect, a hand catches her foot. She opens her eyes.

“Careful,” Levi says, thumb rubbing her arch. [Somewhere in canon, suggestive themes. Based on art from ask-secretrivamika.]

to force the moment: Three times it doesn't happen, and one time it does. [AU, feat. Captain Mikasa/Cadet Levi. Also based on art from ask-secretrivamika. I don't have any links handy.]

drink and be merry: In which Mikasa drinks and ruins things and Levi is annoyed. [Canon. Prompt response that I posted before I started putting them all under one heading (see: start a scene or two); rated for drinking.]

explicit

allaying the fever: The concern she feels as his back hits the desk and his neck overextends is very much in the back of her mind. She crawls – slinks – on top of him, settling astride his legs.

“Levi,” she says, and he drags his head up to look her in the eye, “say it.” [Canon, complete and total smut.]

eat you alive: In which there is stretching, showering, and some other things. [Canon, complete and total smut.]

it's just a phase: Levi believes that Mikasa is going through a rebellious phase and doesn't understand why she insists on tormenting him. [AU, friends to lovers, very smut.]

over the lunch hour: “This is a bad idea,” he says. She crosses her arms.

“And yet you’re here.” Levi snorts. He sticks his hands in his pockets and pivots to walk over to her.

“Didn’t you say you were going to put a curse on me if I didn’t show up?” He tips his face up to meet her eyes.

“I didn’t really mean that.”

“Of course not. And I don’t believe any of that shit so I didn’t care.” [High School Caste AU, janitor Levi and goth Mikasa, very smut. Also in Russian by...someone. They didn't tell me they were doing it so I only stumbled across it recently.]

in the cards: Levi gives Mikasa a card for Valentine's Day. [AU, feat. middle school babies being cute/sad in the first two chapters and adult rivamika smut in the third.]

other

a heap of images: Entries for the Rivamika Week - All-Time Favorite Tropes.

fake relationship (AU, gen)

hurt/comfort (Canon divergence, feat. Eren's death and aftermath; written in December 2019, probably between gen and teen+)

enemies to lovers (Medieval romance AU, teen+ for blood and suggestive stuff)

arranged marriage (AU, somewhere between gen and teen+)

coffeeshop au (swearing, so teen+ I guess)

pining (Canon, set around/during 123)

happily ever after: a collection of post-canon fics, sorted chronologically (not in the order they were written).

clean-shaven: In which Mikasa reluctantly shaves Levi's face. [M, suggestive, not really smut.]

looking into the heart of light: An early morning tryst. [E, very smut (recently added to the collection because it fits).]

on a fragmented memory: The stream, she thinks, is louder this morning. [Gen, angst and fluff.]

in a wink: A tired mother, a baby who doesn't want to sleep, her father, and a jerk in a tea shop. [Gen, rivamika with bb.]

like a ray of light: In which Kuchel and Mikasa visit Eren's grave. [Gen, Mikasa with rivamika bb.]

lilocks: Mikasa and Kuchel walk over to the tea shop. [Gen, first thing written for this series before it actually became a series.]

disturbing the dust: In which Kuchel asks about the scars. [Gen, feat. rivamika second bb in the background.]

start a scene or two: a place for me to put prompt fills and other little things that I didn't feel like posting separately (contains drabbles for other ships but not linked here)

a kiss where it hurts

coffee or tea

warm

post-Zeke asploding Levi drabble

wedding night

AU snippet from a fic I never finished

student/teacher AU

taking care of Historia's baby on the run

rm and their children (feat. a little smuttiness)

blind date

flirting/mild jealousy

in the closet

AU/jealousy

[littleorangecactus]

what about,,,, kids content,,,, with ed specifically,,,, maybe 🥺,,, maybe he could be a bit distant?? <- an ask for a wonderful person! @drop-the-curtain-123

It was hard ya know? Having to listen to your mom and your stepmothers perform every night. It was hard for Edward to sit in the wings and watch as his mother told the story of her life and tragic death, with a smile on her face.

He had only been back a few months, and getting used to a new world was really nerve wracking for him. Edward tried to learn as much as he could from his siblings and his mothers, as to what this world really contained. But the biggest issue he was facing was his mom. He grew up hearing about her, and the love she had for him, but he was raised by different women. Either the maids, or Anna for a little while, Katherine was more of a sister, and then Cathy. But at that point, he was estranged from most people, instead spending a lot of time with his father, learning about how to rule.

He spent his very short life preparing to be a leader, and now he is just another common child in a world with no king! That was something that took a while to get used to. Edward spent a lot of time with Cathy in the library, reading everything about anything, it was never enough. He wanted to understand this world and by King George, he was gonna try his best. He spent a lot of time with the other queens too. Catherine would take him with her to church, giving him a bit of solace when he missed his old life. 

Anne played games with him, whether sports, or board games, or video, he loved getting to do that. With Anna, he learned lessons about life, while also starting to relax. She taught him about things from this world, and how to do a lot of outdoor activities. Katherine would take Edward to go get coffee and to the parks, to get a sense of love for nature. He loved getting to spend time with them.

The only person he didn’t spend a whole lot of time with, was his mom. He tried, Edward really tried to be around her. But every time he tried, he would become distant. Hearing how she died because of giving birth to him, the pain she went through, it made him guilty. And while he knew some of the queens from his past life, he knew absolutely nothing about his mother. For her part, Jane tried her best to connect with him and get him interested in things that she thought he would like. But it never lasted long, as Edward would pull away and just hide in his shell.

Today was no different, the queens were practicing for a show and the children were backstage watching the warm ups. Lizzie was laughing as her mom made Aragon “upset” during don’t lose your head. Mary was laughing at the them, it took her a while to understand them, but she got it. Edward was sitting alone, reading, humming along to the songs softly. He liked going to the rehearsals well enough, he just got lonely at times. He was in a room full of people, and he had never felt more alone. Deciding to head outside for some air, Edward stands up with a deep sigh.

“Where you going princey?” Anna asked jokingly, ruffling his hair. He smiled and looked at her, “I’m just gonna go get some air I think.” She nods as he walks to the door. “Eddie Wait!” Turning around Edward sees his mother walking quickly towards him. “Can I join you please?” Jane asks with a soft gaze. Shrugging his shoulders, Edward holds the door for her and they go to a bench outside the theater. “I- I just want to check in on you. I know transitioning from the past to now has been difficult for you and I’m so sorry that you had to go through it I want you to know that you can come to me okay? We didn’t get to spend a lot of time together when you were born and I’m sorry for that, I wish it could have been different. I want you to know that I am always gonna be here for you and I love you no matter what. You’re my pride and joy and I hope you realize that you have people here who cherish and truly care about you. Don’t think I don’t notice when you drift away, or sit in silence while everyone is together. You don’t need to be so shut in. I hope you feel comfortable here, and if I can help you in any way, please tell me.” Jane is rambling at this point, but she’s kept it all in too long.

 She needs her baby to know how much he is cared for. Sniffles are heard and she turns her head. There’s a single tear rolling down her precious child’s face. Reaching up to wipe it, she cradles his cheek in her hand. “It’s hard mom. Things are different, people are different. I’m okay a lot of the time, I have you guys around me. But that’s also the issue. I don’t know what to feel when I’m around you.” He says looking away from her. Hurt, Jane replies, “what do you mean?”

“You died!! You died because of me! And you act like me being here is so good but you wouldn’t be here if you hadn’t have had such a horrible experience in the past life!” He yells, finally telling her what he’s been keeping for months. Jane gasps and pulls away from him. “Yo-you think that you caused this?” Tears filled her eyes. “I knew what I was risking when I had you. Me and your father found out together and I knew in that moment, I just knew, I would give my entire life up for you. All I ever wanted in this world and the last, was to be a mother. It hurt, a lot. I will not lie about that. But when I got to see you, even for that split second, I knew it was worth it. I always was ready to risk my life for yours because that’s what mothers do. And I’m also glad to have gone,”

 Edward turns his head at this, not believing his ears. “Because I came back. And so did you. And now we have a true and good family. One that loves and accepts us no matter what. And I wouldn’t trade that or the time we spend together for anything. Not even to be married to a king.” Jane holds his chin in her hand, watching the flutter of emotions pass through his face. “You were, are, and always will be my greatest gift and my best risk.” He breaks in this moment, pulling his mom into him. 

Curling his head right above her heart he cries, all the feelings that he hasn’t expressed in so long, all coming forward. “I love you mom..” “I love you to my little king.” Hearing sniffles behind them, the pair turn to see the others standing there with tears on their cheeks. Anne has Lizzie in one arm, the other wrapped around Aragon, who is holding Mary close. Anna has Kat pulled into a bear hug, playing with her hair softly. Lastly, Cathy is holding little Mae, rocking her slowly. Every one of the queens knew and felt those words in their hearts. 

The passing of emotions was always there. “We-we didn’t mean to interrupt. We just wanted to see how it was going!” Kat whimpers our as she wipes the tears from her eyes. “That’s alright. Everything is fine. We all are here and that what matters okay?” Jane smiles at her family and looks at her son. “See, you don’t ever have to feel like you don’t belong there is always someone willing to listen and try to help, in any way we can.” Edward smiles, that smile when you’re crying but you get that happy burst in your heart, and he pulls his mom to her feet.

Meeting with the other queens, a family hug pile commences, a mess of limbs and crying women, but it’s the closest thing to home Edward has felt in a while. And for once, he knows it’s gonna be all fine.

Editor’s note: hi I’m sorry it took so long but there’s been a lot of stuff. But here it is and I hoped I got some of what you wanted to read in here. I really love Edward and momma Jane.

[tits-tats-and-pussycats]

Odds!

1. Who was the last person you held hands with?

Uhmm.. I think it was my best friend? Honestly its been a hot minute since I’ve held hands with anyone. 

3. Who are you looking forward to seeing?

There is someone I really want to see, but I’m not jinxing myself with saying it out loud. So I’ll just say that I am looking forward to seeing my friends again,

5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you?

I’m not sure, probably. 

7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now?

I mean who knows what is going to happen, I am just taking life as it comes at this point. 

9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable?

Lmao no.

11. What does the most recent text that you sent say?

Plague Doctor? lmao my best friend asked for suggestions on what to draw.

13. Do you like it when people play with your hair?

I LOVE when people play with my hair. 

15. What good thing happened this summer?

Well summer 2019 was spent working and going to school. And summer 2020 is closed because of a pandemic..soo....

17. Do you think there is life on other planets?

I think that we can't be the only intelligent life out there. 

19. Do you like bubble baths?

Yes, bubbles, music, some nice wine and a good book

21. What are your bad habits?

Depends on your outlook on a bad habit. I don’t always speak to myself nicely, when I am super stressed or drunk I occasionally have a cigarette. 

23. Do you have trust issues?

I do. 

25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with?

I hate this question, so I will tell you something I like about myself. I like the color of my eyes and the freckles on my shoulders.

27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker?

Darker, I’m basically a vampire. 

29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up?

I think that this is a question that is better left between me and that person. 

31. Is your hair long enough for a pony tell? 

Yes it is, I am thinking about cutting it really short though.. But I’m slightly terrified to do what I want to it.

33. Spell your name with your chin

marksss lmao well I guess I have a new name.

35. Would you rather live without tv or music?

Uhm.. I’d have to say tv. I can live without watching something as long as I have something in the background while I am doing things.

37. What do you say during awkward silences?

Lol if we are being honest I usually don’t say anything because I am feeling to awkward and shy to do so. Or I’ll just go “welllll......” 🤷🏼‍♀️

39. What are you favorite stores to shop in?

Columbia, 5.11, amazon, idk I don’t really shop 

41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance? 

Yes I do and I have given a lot of second chances.

43. Do you smile at strangers?

Yes I do, I try to smile at everyone that I can.

45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning? 

Well my dog because he wants fed. But also the fact that I have a job that I actually like for once. I get out of bed for my friends. And I get out of bed for myself. 

47. Have you ever been high?

Yeah I have and it was the worst experience of my life. It’s not something for me. 

49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about?

No I haven't, I haven’t had much of a life to be able to do so. 

51. Ever wished you were someone else? 

I used to wish that all the time, but now that I actually like myself I am happy with being me. 

53. Favorite makeup brand?

I don’t have one

55. Favorite blog? 

@coopuah 

57. Favorite food?

Itallian, Mexican, Thai, anything my best friend makes

59. First thing you the this morning?

Some water. I didn’t eat until this afternoon when I had a sandwich. 

61. Been suspended\expelled? For what?

No I haven’t. Was that “goody” student 

63. Ever been in love?

I have indeed been in love.

65. Are you hungry right now?

No I am not, I am more exhausted than anything. 

67. Facebook or twitter?

I don’t really care honestly, I’ll scroll on both because im bored but I don’t prefer one over the other. 

69. Are you watching tv right now?

Yes I am, Killing Eve. If you haven’t watched this yet I highly recommend it!

71. Craving something? What?

Yeah more like someone. But I guess something salty would be nice too.

73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals?

I have a husky named Balto that lays at the head of my bed while I sleep. I have to have something on my bed with me now because my bed is empty without my cat that I had to put down 3 months ago. 

75. Favorite animal?

Wolf.

77. Chocolate or vanilla?

Chocolate for ice cream. Vanilla for general flavoring in like coffees and stuff. 

79. What color shirt are you wearing? 

Not wearing one currently

81. Favorite tv show?

I have way to many honestly. Friends, Killing Eve, Grey’s Anatomy, Gilmore Girls, The chilling adventures of Sabrina, The 100. And probably a million more.

83. Mean girls or mean girls 2

Mean girls

85. Favorite character from mean girls? 

Janis Ian

87. First person you talked to today?

 A person who came back into my life.

89. Name a person you hate?

My father

91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now?

Yeah every single person who still thinks its okay to hangout and have parties together, go to the store for non-essential shit, and overall think that this entire pandemic is a joke. Stay the fuck home y'all it’s not that hard. Go out if you need to, but do it alone, go for a drive alone, go for a walk alone. The key word is ALONE. I’m not trying to be quarantined for a year and also have to wear a mask 24/7 at work because people are fucking stupid. Yeah I work in the medical field but I’m sick and tired of the dumbasses. Stay home before everything is cancelled for longer than a month. For fucks sake. End rant. 

93. How many sweatpants do you have?

2-I know I’m a horrible lesbian. Aren't we supposed to have like 20?

95. Last movie you watched?

Princess Diaries 

97. Favorite actor? 

I don’t really have a favorite actor, I’m more of an actress person lmao. But I guess I really like Robert Downey Jr. 

99. Have any pets?

Yes I currently have a border collie named Rocky. He is my entire world. I used to have a cat named Abby but I recently had to put her down. 

101. Do you type fast?

About 70-80 words a minute, I guess that's fast?

103. Can you spell well?

Yeah not at all.. 

105. Ever been to a bonfire party? 

Yeah but it was back in the day when I went to church before satan granted me with lesbianism. 

107. Have you ever been on a horse?

Yes I have I think I was 10? I would like to go horse back riding again though

109. Is something irritating you right now?

Yeah there is actually, but it’s something I can't talk about because it really shouldn’t be irritating me or bothering me. 

111. Do you have trust issues?

Pretty sure this question was already answered. 

113. What was your childhood nickname?

My family calls me bug. 

115. Do you play the WII?

Nope because I don’t have one

117. Do you like chicken noodle soup?

Not unless it’s homemade 

119. Favorite book?

Harry Potter

121. Are you mean?

I mean I definitely can be but I try not to be.

123. Can you keep white shoes clean?

Lmao no, I can barely keep white clothes clean.

125. Do you believe in true love?

I do wholeheartedly 

127. What makes you happy?

My dog, my family, my best friends, iced coffee, rainy days, being in the forest, being at the beach, cuddling movie nights, etc.

129. Whats your zodiac sign?

I am a capricorn

131. Your best friend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?

Tell him that I am flattered but he knows I am a lesbian and that it will not work. 

133. Favorite lyrics right now? 

I don't really have any specific lyrics that I like at the moment, But I highly love the songs shotgun by George Ezra, honeypie by Johny Utah, anything by Billie Eilish, 

135. Dumbest lie you ever told?

“I’m straight”

137. How tall are you?

5′3

139. Brunette or blonde?

Like am I brunette or blonde? or which one do I like the most? My natural hair color is blonde, I don’t really have a preference on the hair color for the person I am attracted to, I guess you could say dirty blonde or strawberry blonde to meet in the middle? 

141. Night or day? 

Both, it depends on the situation and what is being done. I honestly kind of like the in-between times like dusk and dawn. 

143. Are you a vegetarian?

No I am not, I tried to do it for awhile and I couldn't.

145. Tea or coffee? 

Depends on the situation and time of day. I would rather have coffee in the morning and tea at night usually. 

147. Mars or snickers?

Neither

149. Do you believe in ghosts?

Yes I do. 

Honestly unholy shit, this was the longest thing I have ever had to do lol. 

[mauloveskpop]

My The Rose Concert Experience

I got top 10 tastemakers so I got free VIP tickets and we got to go in before everyone else so I got to stand at the very front literally right in front of Jaehyeong’s mic stand. The wait for the concert to begin felt like it took hours even though it was about 1 hour and then the concert felt like 2 minutes.

Every song was amazing as usual, I’d tell you the order of the songs but so many things happened I have no idea lol. 

Jaehyeong must’ve looked at me at least like 20 times, since I was right in front of him. I did finger hearts at him and he did it back <3 i melted. He was just smiley the entire time it was hard to look away. When you’re that close to the stage it’s hard to not look at the person right in front of you all the time. So whenever someone else came over it was the same thing like !!!! i can’t look away. 

During Bae Bae they’re all moving around the stage and the girl to my right was filming and holding her phone out and Woosung came over and took it and filmed himself for a little bit and then he gave it back and took another girls phone. God I wish I was filming at that point. 

Between two songs Dojoon started to take off his jacket and everyone just !!!!!!!!! and he laughed and told Jaehyeong to do the same and the same reaction of course. THEN he jokingly told Woosung to take off his shirt since he was not wearing a jacket the crowd chanted “take it off” and Woosung just looks down his shirt and goes “not today”. Bitch don’t do it ever.

The crowd was very excited for Hajoon and someone yelled that she loved him and then said that she loves all of them and Woosung just “it’s okay if you only love Hajoon”.

I almost didn’t cry but then I.L.Y happened and there you go, I controlled it though since I knew I’d have to meet them up close later :P 

Here’s the one video I filmed

That’s all I can recall from the concert at this time moving on to hi touch + group photo.

Time to do a “keep reading” cause there’s a lot.

Hi Touch first, it was super quick just a hi + high5 and moving on. Woosung however decided this was a good time to compliment my hair (my poor heart). Which is pink and just above the shoulders. 

We go around and do the group photo and as i’m getting up to go and wait for the QA Woosung AGaIN says “nice hair”. Please my weak heart. 

I’ll probably look terrible in the photo, I do not photograph well. But whatever he complimented me twice and he was not done with that.

Not much more to say there so moving on to the QA.

We had to wait for everyone else to leave and then we were taken backstage. There were 6 girls, myself included. So it was very intimate and special. We were in this small room on chairs pretty close together. We waited a minute or two before the boys came in and they were adorable. So pretty man gosh, who allowed it. 

We all sent in 3 questions each before and they picked randomly. I probably dont remember all the ones they answered. 

One of mine was first. It was something along the lines of “is there a song or album of yours that is about your life” or something. These answers are not word for word. W: Dawn, cause they wrote all the songs on it H: I.L.Y cause he loves us J: She’s In The Rain, I don’t remember exactly what he said but it was something about that they wrote it. D: He couldn’t think of anything saying his life was too complicated so Woosung came in with Avril Lavinge’s Complicated.

One question was asking Dojoon specifically what he does in his spare time, he said he stalks us all on social media, sleeps, eats, watches movies, sleeps and writes songs. 

What motivates you to keep making music? This was a funny one, pretty much word for word. W: Oh that’s easy! Should we do it on 123? 123 W: Black Roses D: The Rose! Everyone: ??? D: I meant to say black roses but the black didn’t come out W: The Black Roses?

About halfway through they were like oh what’s your names? So we said our names one by one and I said mine and Woosung just kinda quietly just “that’s a pretty name” why are you doing this to me Woosung! He didn’t do that with anyone else so I’m just why stop pls.

Another question was if they’d put any unofficial songs on an album. Woosung turned it on us and asked what songs we wanted and the first girls were trying to say song names and then it got quiet thinking of songs we wanted so I just said “All of them” and the girls agreed.  Woosung said they might put them all on an album once they make a full album.

They answered like 8 questions but my brain is all blank cause Woosung, this was not the end of it all though. He was not done killing me. I’ll post the other questions later if I remember them XD

So after the QA it was time for individual photos with them and then they signed the item we brought for them to sign in one go for each person. I was like 3rd or 4th. 

We were standing against the wall me in the middle, shoulder to shoulder. I was so lame cause I know I don’t photograph well so it’s whatever. Took a couple photos that will be emailed to me, so I don’t have them yet. 

Then I brought out the Void photocards for them to sign and they got really excited. Dojoon said it doesnt even look like him lol. Woosung was really fast signing it which is funny cause he wrote the most. He then decided to have a casual conversation with me about hair dyeing. Since you know, pink hair. Here’s a summary of what we said. W: How many times did you have to bleach it to get that? Me: I dont even know W: Is it like really damaged? Cause mine was when I dyed it white, it’s better now though. We did say more than that but that’s what it was, the whole time for like 1 minute or 2 we had eye contact and I’m just dying inside. He didn’t decide to have a casual conversation with any of the other girls either, i’m fucking dead guys. 

The others got done signing and there’s so many tiny hearts on them I melt.

The next girl covered her face cause she was embarrassed so the boys covered their faces which made it worse and she crouched so they crouched. So they took her photos while crouched lol.

The last girl was very shy and didn’t like having her photo taken and mentioned looking ugly so the boys just went “no no you’re beautiful” and stuff like that. Woosung decides to start singing to her and she just tries to run away and he sings “where are you going?”. She then asked if the rest of us could look away while they took the photo.

It was then time for the boys to go and Woosung suggested a group hug but the manager said no :( (which is understandable but :((( )

They then went around and high fived us all again before going.

We collected our merch and that was it. I’ll be posting some concert photos separately. 

[earth-ambassador-jim]

The Missing Month Chapter 2

Loops 4-7

This is a fanfiction that explores what happened during the first 30 time loops that Jim was in in the episode D'Aja Vu.

AO3 - Fanfiction

4.

Jim sped down the street on his Vespa. No sign of Porgon so far. He had to be hiding in some dark corner, but where?

There was a ping from his cell phone. He glanced down to see Toby was reporting that he had cleared one street and was starting on the next.

That had been Claire’s idea. Since Jim was the only one, as far as they could tell, who remembered the time loop it made sense that all information should be reported to him. That way they didn’t have to backtrack on the next loop.

Right now they were systematically searching the town to figure out where Porgon was. For the moment he was their main suspect for the cause of the timeloop.

5.

“It’s always that blue flash!” Jim complained as he paced the kitchen.

Toby and Claire watched him from the bar.

“Clearly it’s a clue, Master Jim!” Blinky commented, taking another bite out of his whip cream slathered wrench.

“Clue,” AAARRRGGHH echoed watching with interest.

“It must be the source of this disturbance. We must observe it carefully and find its source!”

“But how? My memory isn’t that great and it’s hard enough keeping track of the places we’ve cleared.” Jim sighed and flipped the bacon. “I’m so tired of today.”

“Never fear, Master Jim!” Blinky walked around the bar to place a hand on Jim’s shoulder. “We shall get you out of this time loop yet! You simply must be patient. Like the cunning stalkling, bide your time, learn all you can, and then, when the moment is right, capture your prey and end this cycle of repetition.”

He swung a couple of his fists in demonstration. Jim gave him a tired smile and returned his attention to the eggs. He adjusted the heat slightly and tossed the shells to AAARRRGGHH who happily gulped them down.

“So what should we do this time?”

“Is there enough time between seeing the blue flash and the time loop resetting for us to tell you which direction we see it coming from?” Claire asked. “If there is we could probably triangulate its source.”

“Not really. I mean I suppose we could get me to a different side of town before the end of each loop…”

“Could go to lookout,” AAARRRGGHH rumbled.

“Lookout?”

“Above town,” He clarified. “On top of hill.”

“You genius!” Toby exclaimed, giving the troll a hug. “We can all just chill up on the hilltop for the rest of the loop and then Jim will be able to see where the light is coming from.”

“But first, breakfast,” Jim said, turning off the burners.

6.

“I think it starts at the planetarium,” Jim decided at last.

They were all standing around the kitchen table at his house looking at a map of Arcadia and a photograph of the view from the hill.

“Looks like it,” Toby replied. He glanced at Jim.  “Do you really think it’s Porgon?”

“He seems like the likeliest candidate,” Jim said, rolling up the map with a shrug. “He vanished after picking up that strange cylinder last night. It was glowing the exact same blue as the flash.”

Toby let out a wistful sigh; chin coming to rest on his folded arms.

“I wish I could remember. We finally get a time loop and I haven’t got to do anything fun with it.”

Jim snorted.

“Like what?”

“Like stuff you’d never do normally! We could prank Steve and get away with it. Learn to play the piano. Convince everyone you’re psychic!”

“Finally get done studying for the test tomorrow?” suggested Claire, giving Jim a pointed look.

Jim held up his finger and inhaled, then paused.

“You know what? I’m actually kind of tempted to do that one.” He shook his head to clear it. “But for now, focus. Think we should head over to the planetarium before the time loop starts over?”

“How long do we have?” Claire asked.

Jim glanced at his cell phone.

“About three hours. The flash happens just before noon.”

“Okay, so let’s make a plan of attack,” She suggested. “We should definitely meet up at the planetarium instead of here or the café, if we loop again. I’m sure you can convince us pretty easily and then explain things when we get there.”

“It’s so weird creating plans we won’t remember,” Toby interrupted. “I feel like I should give you a message to pass onto my future past self.”

“Oh right!” Claire suddenly exclaimed, eyes widening. “When you tell us that our meeting place has changed to the planetarium be sure to remind me to check the oven. I totally burned the casserole I was trying out this morning.”

“Okay,” Jim said slowly. “Anything else I should pass along?”

“Can I please punch Steve on one of these loops?” Toby asked.

“No.”

 7.

Easy peasy, Lemon squeezy everything is fine.

Easy breezy 123 It’s all because you're mine

Jim yawned and hit the alarm. He lay still in bed, eyes closed. It surely wouldn’t hurt to grab just a few more minutes of sleep, right? It wasn’t like the time loop restarted that quickly. Porgon might not even be at the planetarium yet, though they had confirmed last loop that was definitely where the flash came from.

What felt like less than a minute later Jim was roused by the sound of his cellphone ringing incessantly. For a moment he contemplated smothering it with a pillow. Grudgingly he reached a hand out of the warmth of his bed and made a blind grab for it.

His hand brushed it, then it slipped out of his grasp and onto the floor. Jim groaned and poked his head out to see where it was so he could retrieve it. He did a silent cheer as he managed to snag it without getting out of bed.

“Hey.”

“There you are Jimbo!” Toby sounded relieved. “We were wondering where you were. You were supposed to meet us at the café like 15 minutes ago.”

“Sorry,” Jim said, voice scratchy. “I thought I could rest a few minutes after my alarm… I guess I must have ended up sleeping in.”

What time was it anyway?

“Aw. Classic mistake. No sweat. When do you think you can join us?”

“How about we meet up at the planetarium in a half hour?”

“Sounds good,” Toby said and then paused. “But why the planetarium? Don’t they have the science fair going on there?”

Jim yawned and stretched.

“Yeah, don’t worry about it. I’ll explain when we get there.”

Jim arrived at the planetarium at 10 am sharp with a dozen chocolate chip cookies packed in a brown paper bag. Hopefully they would suffice for an apology. The planetarium was already open, so at least they wouldn’t have to break in.

Claire and Toby pulled up on their bicycles.

“Sorry again for sleeping in,” Jim said handing Toby the sack.

“It’s really no problem, Jimbo,” Toby said taking it from him. “You need your sleep.”

His friend opened the sack and burst into a wide grin as he caught the smell of the cookies. Claire leaned forward to peer into the sack as well.

“Hey!” Toby exclaimed as she darted forward and got one before he did.

“So what’s going on?” Claire asked, ignoring him.

“Long story short, we’re in a time loop. I’m the only one who remembers each loop. This is loop number seven and we’ve determined that Porgon is going to be here… Probably.”

Claire and Toby stared at him for a long moment.

“Probably?” Claire asked slowly as Toby started emitting a high pitched squeal of excitement.

“Well this seems to be were the blue flash at the end of each time loop is coming from. We were close enough when it happened last time to hear roars, so I’m pretty sure it’s Porgon.”

“Okay. What should we do?”

“Can we…” Toby started.

“No pranking Steve.”

Toby deflated.

“Last loop we decided it would be best to scout out the building to see if we could find Porgon or anything suspicious before the timeloop restarts. Ideally we would have been here earlier, but…”

“Okay,” Claire said cutting him off.  “I’ll see if I can talk the staff into letting me into the back.”

“I call perimeter!” Toby volunteered.

“And I’ll look around the exhibits. Great. Text me immediately if you guys find anything.”

They met up about an hour later.

“So no luck, I’m guessing?” Jim hadn’t got any texts, but he had to ask anyway.

“Nope.”

“Nothing,” Claire confirmed and then paused before adding. “I did have to break into a few rooms, so if we manage to unloop time we should find a way to clear the security cameras. My mom is getting increasingly closer to putting a restraining order on you guys.”

One of the passing students gave them a weird look.

“Man, can you believe everyone did volcanos again?” Toby asked looking around them. “Why do we even have a science fair if everyone is just going to do volcanos?”

Claire shrugged and looked around.

“Well I was going to do something on a study on algae that I thought was pretty cool, but there really hasn’t been time with everything that’s been going on.”

“Sorry about that,” Jim said rubbing the back of his neck.

“Don’t be.”

“Still, it feels like you guys never get time to do regular high school stuff because you’re always helping me out.”

“We’re your friends, Jimbo,” Toby said giving him a look that allowed no argument. “Besides, I think stopping the end of the world might be a little more important that some high school science fair.”

“True,” Jim said looking away sheepishly.

They settled down to watch as the participants all trailed in.

“Oh! That one’s different,” Toby said pointing across the room.

Jim looked and, sure enough, a student he didn’t know was standing proudly over a strange claw like device.

“Huh. That does look interesting.”

Jim started to stand up.

There was a loud roar. Porgon.

Toby and Claire bolted to their feet beside him as the giant red troll emerged from the balcony. He jumped onto the model solar system causing the orbs to spin out of control.

Without thinking Jim summoned his armor.

The students evacuating in terror around him stopped to stare. He had forgotten that they were there. He could feel their stares as Daylight appeared in his hand. Mary actually pulled out her phone and took a picture. That wasn’t good…

Jim shook his head. He would deal with it later.

He charged forward with a yell, Claire and Toby on his heels.

Porgon held up some sort of strange, blue glowing cylinder. The one he had picked up last night. Or rather the last night before the time loop started.

The troll laughed triumphantly as Jim skidded to a halt.

There was a flash of blue light.

 8.

Easy peasy…

Jim slammed his hand down on his alarm clock with entirely too much force. They needed to figure out a way to get the science fair canceled.

This is going to be longer than I initially anticipated. It's a bit trickier that I thought it would be as well. I suppose 30 time loops it quite a few... Poor Jim, I can already feel his pain.

I have something fun planned for the midway point though.

Next time... the Trollhunters try their hands at sabotage.

[wurwurz]

I was tagged by @adaline-hiero, thank you sweetie.

1. Who was the last person you held hands with? My mother.

2. Are you outgoing or shy? I used to be very shy at school and university era, even as a young adult. I wouldn't say I'm outgoing now. But not shy anymore. Right in the middle.

3. Who are you looking forward to seeing? My mother and my brother because they are all the family I have left. My dog because he's my baby.

4. Are you easy to get along with? Yes

5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you? I've never ever been drunk in my life. No interest.

6. What kind of people are you attracted to? The ones who could not be attracted to me. The Hiddleston and Cumberbatch kind (funny, smart, artist, educated, gentleman, caring, giving, handsome but doesn't act like he God knows it, heartful, sensitive...)

7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now? Nah.

8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind? My dash shows me a lot of Brie Larson content these days (due to Marvel) and I envy her silhouette, mainly her boobs.

9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable? Online ? Nah. Face to face, depends.

10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with? My dog. "How not to pee in the kitchen when mom is in the bedroom".

11. What does the most recent text that you sent say? “Damned Quasimodo !” to my brother (Notre Dame de Paris burning).

12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now? I don't listen to the radio, so I barely listen to "new" songs.

13. Do you like it when people play with your hair? Kids, no. Lover, yes.

14. Do you believe in luck and miracles? As much as I believe in Nessy.

15. What good thing happened this summer? I went to the Provence.

16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again? No.

17. Do you think there is life on other planets? That's not even a question. Just logic. Yes there is life on other planets and I hope it is nothing like humans.

18. Do you still talk to your first crush? No.

19. Do you like bubble baths? I prefer showers.

20. Do you like your neighbors? Two look like serial killers, one is 110 years old, one obviously doesn't know what a shower is for, two other kill my nose sensitivity everytime they open their door, one loves to play music until 4 in the morning. Noooope.

21. What are you bad habits? I try to do 10 things at once. Worse is that I do succeed.

22. Where would you like to travel? London.

23. Do you have trust issues? If I understand the question right, ooooh yes.

24. Favorite part of your daily routine? Going back home in the evening.

25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with? My thumbs because I've got brachydactyly.

26. What do you do when you wake up? I rub my eyes and I complain about me not sleeping enough.

27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker? My skin is as white as Olaf and I love it. It never gets tanned, it's fascinating. I turn red and then all white again.

28. Who are you most comfortable around? My mum.

29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up? No.

30. Do you ever want to get married? Not really.

31. If your hair long enough for a pony tail? Yes.

32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with? Tom and Benedict and meeeee.

33. Spell your name with your chin. I have no dea what that one means.

34. Do you play sports? What sports? Yes, shopping and I've very good at it.

35. Would you rather live without TV or music? Depends. Sometimes I listen to music for hours everyday and sometimes I don't listen to a single tune. Same for TV.

36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them? Yes.

37. What do you say during awkward silences? I laugh.

38. Describe your dream girl/guy? The answer will sound so teenish. The two actors I feel for.

39. What are your favorite stores to shop in? Decoration stores.

40. What do you want to do after high school? I am 43, honey.

41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance? Some yes, others neva eva.

42. If your being extremely quiet what does it mean? I've just woken up.

43. Do you smile at strangers? If they walk their dog, yes. Though I first smile at the dog.

44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean? Asgard.

45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning? An invisible force stronger than me.

46. What are you paranoid about? Losing the 2 only members of my family.

47. Have you ever been high? No and not willing to be.

48. Have you ever been drunk? No, police officer.

49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about? I was made for acting bad. ^^

50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore? I don't wear hoodies.

51. Ever wished you were someone else? Yes. Currently wishing I was Bobby Hiddleston. But I wouldn't enjoy being that furry for long.

52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself? More confident.

53. Favourite makeup brand? Revolution Beauty for cheap brand. Make Up For Ever.

54. Favourite store? Make up ? Sephora

55. Favourite blog? Some I love equaly, so no name.

56. Favourite colour? Green.

57. Favourite food? Pizza.

58. Last thing you ate? Foret noire (Bonte Divina).

59. First thing you ate this morning? Nesquik + Princes Lu.

60. Ever won a competition? Yes, if work competition are included. My boss didn't know if he should keep me or the other girl (I knew he preferd the other girl because of her short skirts), so he gave us tests. I won. Hehehe.

61. Been suspended/expelled? No comprendo.

62. Been arrested? For what? No.

63. Ever been in love? Yes.

64. Tell us the story of your first kiss? No, I won't.

65. Are you hungry right now? A bit. But on a diet for one day so I'm not gonna ruin it already !

66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends? I hate them all !!! lol

67. Facebook or Twitter? Sick of Facebook. Too unpretty for my standards and too full of boring stuff. Twitter.

68. Twitter or Tumblr? Tumblr !

69. Are you watching tv right now? Yes.

70. Names of your bestfriends? Tic and Tac.

71. Craving something? What? Another one I don't get. What is to crave ?

72. What colour are your towels? Taupe (light brown).

72. How many pillows do you sleep with? One ergonomic.

73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals? No but I wished that my real living animal would like to sleep with me, but he doesn't. Chihuahuas...

74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have? Me, none. My dog has over 20.

75. Favourite animal? Except dogs, gorillas.

76. What colour is your underwear? White.

77. Chocolate or Vanilla? Chocolate.

78. Favourite ice cream flavour? Pistachio / Mint.

79. What colour shirt are you wearing? Depends.

80. What colour pants? Depends.

81. Favourite tv show? Sherlock.

82. Favourite movie? Bram Stoker's Dracula.

83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2? Since I don't know what it is, I guess... none !

84. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street? I used to watch 21 Jump Street when I was a teenie with Depp that I already didn't like... Overrated actor.

85. Favourite character from Mean Girls? Stop asking.

86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo? The mean shark. Kidding. Dory.

87. First person you talked to today? My dog asking him if he had slept well. He never answered.

88. Last person you talked to today? My dog wishing him a good night. He never replied.

89. Name a person you hate? My grandmother. Wishing her the worst on earth (loooooong story).

90. Name a person you love? My mother + my own Myscroft.

91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now? My grandmother now that you brought that back.

92. In a fight with someone? No.

93. How many sweatpants do you have? None. That's a fashion no for anybody.

94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have? No hoodie. Sweaters a bunch.

95. Last movie you watched? Crappy movies on Netflix and I have no idea how they were called...

96. Favourite actress? Sigourney Weaver.

97. Favourite actor? Benedict Cumberbatch because he blew me away too many times. Tom Hiddleston is a great contender.

98. Do you tan a lot? Not at all. But I do get red.

99. Have any pets? One chihuahua, Cookie, 9 years old. Had another chihuahua named Bobby who passed away last year. He was 11.

100. How are you feeling? Ok? I'm at home watching Notre Dame burning. I'm sad.

101. Do you type fast? Kind of.

102. Do you regret anything from your past? Sadly yes.

103. Can you spell well? Yes.

104. Do you miss anyone from your past? My father. He passed away in 2015.

105. Ever been to a bonfire party? No idea what it is.

106. Ever broken someone’s heart? Happened.

107. Have you ever been on a horse? My friend told me it was a horse and confessed it was just a big poney afterwards.

108. What should you be doing? Giffing !

109. Is something irritating you right now? I'm biting a nail and I've just ruined it.

110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt? Yes.

111. Do you have trust issues? You've already asked that one, parrot.

112. Who was the last person you cried in front of? My mother.

113. What was your childhood nickname? "Nini la sauce".

114. Have you ever been out of your province/state? I went to Germany to meet an actor I don't care about now. I met online buddies, visited Germany. Was great.

115. Do you play the Wii? PLAYSTATION !!!

116. Are you listening to music right now? Nope.

117. Do you like chicken noodle soup? No.

118. Do you like Chinese food? No.

119. Favourite book? The vampire Lestat, Anne Rice.

120. Are you afraid of the dark? No. Love it.

121. Are you mean? Hehehe, yesssss.

122. Is cheating ever okay? No. Never.

123. Can you keep white shoes clean? No, not with a doggie.

124. Do you believe in love at first sight? Yes.

125. Do you believe in true love? Yes.

126. Are you currently bored? A bit, that thing is too long.

127. What makes you happy? When my bank doesn't call to complain about my empty account.

128. Would you change your name? Noooo. Marilyn is a beautiful name. Merci, maman.

129. What your zodiac sign? Aquarius.

130. Do you like subway? Never used subway.

131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do? God that silly thing happened. That was embarrassing. He was just a friend, not someone I ever felt for. That has ruined our friendship, he was kind of married.

132. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with? Not kidding, you have already asked the same question, right ?

133. Favourite lyrics right now? “shoo-be-doo-be-doo" by Madonna. Yeah, that's deep.

134. Can you count to one million? Happy to know I have always had better things to do.

135. Dumbest lie you ever told? "I hadn't noticed that Cookie had vomited right there, mom, promise". For the record, she cleaned. *g*

136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed? Closed door ! I live in the french Bronx !

137. How tall are you? 162 cm. Something like... 28 cm shorter than Tom Hiddleston.

138. Curly or Straight hair? Wavy.

139. Brunette or Blonde? Brunette with one or two white hair already.

140. Summer or Winter? Summer. I hate, like really really hate winter.

141. Night or Day? Night.

142. Favourite month? July.

143. Are you a vegetarian? I'm weirdian. I don't like meat, I don't like vegetables. I am a pain in the ass when you ask me to come diner.

144. Dark, milk or white chocolate? Milk chocolate.

145. Tea or Coffee? Coffee. Benedict can keep all the tea.

146. Was today a good day? Until my country lost one of its most iconic monument, yes.

147. Mars or Snickers? Mars.

148. What’s your favourite quote? “If it bleeds, we can kill it”. ^^

149. Do you believe in ghosts? No but Zach Bagans would make me say yes.

150. Do you tag anyone else to do this? I always fear I bore my mutuals with these, so nope.

[hypereactive]

1. Who was the last person you held hands with? my best friend

2. Are you outgoing or shy? shy

3. Who are you looking forward to seeing? my best friend

4. Are you easy to get along with? depends. i try to be, but im also REALLY picky/have strong opinions on a lot of stuff, and im autistic..

5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you? yeah

6. What kind of people are you attracted to? a caring one, who listens before judging

7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now? yeah

8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind? my best friend

9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable? sometimes

10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with? probably my best friend

11. What does the most recent text that you sent say? “o”

12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now? uhm. I like A LOT of songs.

billie ellish- bury a friend and you should see me in a crown

rag’n’bone man - human

rebel - black pearl (hes a pirate)

Aladdin soundtrack - Prince Ali and one jump ahead

arctic monkeys - Do I wanna know?

13. Do you like it when people play with your hair? rarely

14. Do you believe in luck and miracles? yea

15. What good thing happened this summer? new job, in my field of study

16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again? yepp

17. Do you think there is life on other planets? probs at least simple life

18. Do you still talk to your first crush? only if I run into him getting coffee (he works there)

19. Do you like bubble baths? if im in the mood

20. Do you like your neighbors? one i do, one i absolutely dont, the rest i dont interact w

21. What are you bad habits? im REALLY picky, and can come off as ungrateful (if u can’t do it right id rather u just not do it. apparently its more common to think at least you got something/they tried.)

22. Where would you like to travel? Anywhere w the right people. Nowhere without.

23. Do you have trust issues? kinda. More like I understand people wont understand me or meet my needs adequately.

24. Favorite part of your daily routine? morning coffee

25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with? my chin/teeth

26. What do you do when you wake up? if I have ResponsibilitesTM i get up and get coffee and leave the house in less than 20 min, otherwise i lay in bed on tumblr until i have to get up due to responsibilities or hunger.

27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker? im good w where its at tbh

28. Who are you most comfortable around? my best friend

29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up? yeah. 

30. Do you ever want to get married? yeah

31. Is your hair long enough for a pony tail? lol yesss

32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with? none?

33. Spell your name with your chin. bdfuds

34. Do you play sports? What sports? not really. i like frisbee and longboarding if those count.

35. Would you rather live without TV or music? TV

36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them? no. I cant keep secrets.

37. What do you say during awkward silences? i usu dont. ill just go on my phone/leave/etc

38. Describe your dream girl/guy? my best friend. 

39. What are your favorite stores to shop in? hot topic

40. What do you want to do after high school? lol im not in high school

41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance? depends on what they did and why, and if they want to grow as a person/make it right

42. If your being extremely quiet what does it mean? im tired/overwhelmed/content/bored

43. Do you smile at strangers? if i lock eyes with them and they smiled, i might smile back, but im pretty good at Not Looking At People

44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean? ocean

45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning? ResponsibilitiesTM

46. What are you paranoid about? having a heart attack and no one being around to help me/not noticing until its too late

47. Have you ever been high? yea

48. Have you ever been drunk? yea

49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about? no

50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore? black

51. Ever wished you were someone else? no, but i have wished my parents were

52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself? my chin probs. idk i like myself

53. Favourite makeup brand? i dont wear makeup

54. Favourite store? this is a duplicate question.

55. Favourite blog? uhm.

56. Favourite colour? black/grey/light pink/raspberry/celery green

57. Favourite food? cheese, cheddar brats, spinach, chocolate chip cookies, milkshakes

58. Last thing you ate? rice w beef, spinach, egg and soy sauce

59. First thing you ate this morning? coffee and nutella

60. Ever won a competition? For what? I think so but i cant remember. Oh i think I won an anti-bullying poster competition once.

61. Been suspended/expelled? For what? lol nopee

62. Been arrested? For what? no

63. Ever been in love? few times now

64. Tell us the story of your first kiss? uh. no. cuz i didnt even like the dude.

65. Are you hungry right now? no

66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends? i only have one real friend so I feel like thats unfair

67. Facebook or Twitter? tumblr.

68. Twitter or Tumblr? still tumblr

69. Are you watching tv right now? lol no

70. Names of your bestfriends? no, bc hed not appreciate it

71. Craving something? What? not rn

72. What colour are your towels? grey or floral w pinks and blacks and oranges

72. How many pillows do you sleep with? 3

73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals? yes, usu. 2

74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have? total? uh. 8?

75. Favourite animal? birbs prob.

76. What colour is your underwear? why?

77. Chocolate or Vanilla? chocolate, unless its ice cream. then vanilla

78. Favourite ice cream flavour? berry (any) or cheesecake (also any)

79. What colour shirt are you wearing? grey

80. What colour pants? a darker grey

81. Favourite tv show? uh. i like sherlock.

82. Favourite movie? deadpool probs. or pirates of the Caribbean. or Aladdin. or detective pikachu.

83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2? never seen either

84. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street? never seen either

85. Favourite character from Mean Girls? n/a

86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo? uhm. I cant remember. Probs the black and white one w the scar, or the starfish, or the sea gull

87. First person you talked to today? my sister

88. Last person you talked to today? my best friend

89. Name a person you hate? my past roommate

90. Name a person you love? my best friend

91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now? my past roommate and most recent ex

92. In a fight with someone? currently? no? ever? yes.

93. How many sweatpants do you have? 5

94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have? 6

95. Last movie you watched? i dont know

96. Favourite actress? i dunno

97. Favourite actor? i dunno

98. Do you tan a lot? no

99. Have any pets? no

100. How are you feeling? i dont know

101. Do you type fast? yeah

102. Do you regret anything from your past? yeah, but not overly

103. Can you spell well? i think so 

104. Do you miss anyone from your past? no

105. Ever been to a bonfire party? i dont think so, but i want to (w the right people)

106. Ever broken someone’s heart? yeah, oops

107. Have you ever been on a horse? yep

108. What should you be doing? cleaning my house

109. Is something irritating you right now? no

110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt? yea

111. Do you have trust issues? yea

112. Who was the last person you cried in front of? my best friend

113. What was your childhood nickname? B. as in, just the letter

114. Have you ever been out of your province/state? yea

115. Do you play the Wii? no

116. Are you listening to music right now? yea

117. Do you like chicken noodle soup? not usually

118. Do you like Chinese food? i think so

119. Favourite book? uhm. sherlock (the whole series). the uglies series (scott westerfield). the secret garden. Fahrenheit 451. 1984. 

120. Are you afraid of the dark? no, but sometimes im afraid theres something in it

121. Are you mean? no

122. Is cheating ever okay? no

123. Can you keep white shoes clean? if i want to

124. Do you believe in love at first sight? no

125. Do you believe in true love? im not sure i know what this means

126. Are you currently bored? no

127. What makes you happy? i dont know

128. Would you change your name? no

129. What your zodiac sign? gemini

130. Do you like subway? i cant eat there

131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do? lol weve been dating for a while now

132. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with? my best friend

133. Favourite lyrics right now? uh. I dont know.

134. Can you count to one million? that would take a month, so no.

135. Dumbest lie you ever told? i dont know. probably that i couldnt go to work bc i was “throwing up from a migraine” when i hadnt thrown up (yet).

136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed? it varies

137. How tall are you? i think im like. 5′8″?

138. Curly or Straight hair? curly. but not consistent

139. Brunette or Blonde? i am a brunette

140. Summer or Winter? winter. i can always wear more clothes

141. Night or Day? night. its quiet and calm

142. Favourite month? august and october

143. Are you a vegetarian? no

144. Dark, milk or white chocolate? yes.

145. Tea or Coffee? yes. depends on time of day/year/mood/etc

146. Was today a good day? i dont know

147. Mars or Snickers? mars

148. What’s your favourite quote? “if you cant explain it simply, you dont understand it well enough” -einstien is one of them. but there are more

149. Do you believe in ghosts? i dont know

150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page? “aunt lillian’s footsteps became more distant, became whispers, were gone.”

@ramblebrambleamble i got bored and answered all of them

[caramell0w]

Sugar and Spice Chapter 1

Since you guys are the best, I am going to give you a sneak peek of my book that comes out next week. This is all of chapter 1 of my book! If you want to order a copy (99 cents, come on and help a girl out) you can buy it from any of these links:

Amazon: https://amzn.to/2MW0F66

Kobo: https://bit.ly/2PifTjx

Smashwords: https://bit.ly/2MW0Kqq

Books2read.com: books2read.com/u/4DlNlA  

Books2read and Smashwords have a few other websites they partner with so check those out for additional places to purchase (including Barnes and Noble and Ibooks)

Chapter 1

The funeral is over and everyone is still in disbelief that she is gone. She was too young, too healthy to be ripped from our family so soon. Aunt Sheryl was the one constant in my life; I could count on her for everything since my mom passed away during my freshman year in high school. Aunt Sheryl made everyone around her smile, and she had a true talent for making the best baked goods around. I have no idea how I am going to manage this all without her.   

Two days after we buried her, I’m sitting in her attorney’s office, listening to the reading of the will with her husband, my Uncle Rob.

“Finally, to my darling niece, Kaylan Santine, I give you complete control and ownership of Little Sweet Shoppe. She has always been good to me and I know she will do wonders for you. Make me proud and keep her in the family.”

“What?” I almost choke on my water, so I place the glass on the table in front of me. “I know nothing of owning a bakery! I don’t even know how to bake that well. Why isn’t she leaving it to you, Uncle Rob?” I ask, panicking.

The attorney hands me the will so I can read it myself. I read it once, twice, three times before handing it back and leaning into the fabric chair. How could she do this? What was she thinking? I’m shell-shocked as I sit here, staring straight ahead, before my uncle waves his hands in front of my face.

“Kaylan, are you still with us?” Uncle Rob asks.

“Yeah,” I whisper. “Why not leave it with you or sell it? Why leave it to me?” I turn my full attention to Uncle Rob, my eyes pleading for answers.

“You were the only one she trusted with the store that is family. You worked there for many summers throughout high school and college. You know the ropes. When we were putting this will together a few years back, she was adamant that you take control of the shop.”

I take a deep breath and slowly exhale, my mind racing, trying to think rationally about this, how to make this work. There are people who work in the bakery that know the ropes, and I could buy some books on how to do it…

“Uncle Rob, what if I can’t do this?” I look at him, my eyes shimmering with unshed tears.

“Kaylan, your aunt had all the faith in the world you could do this. I’m too old to take on something like this, and she couldn’t bear to see it close. She felt the shop was too important to the community and refused to sell it to a chain store. She wanted to be able to keep small businesses around.” He reaches forward and places a reassuring hand on my knee. “Please try. If things really start going south, we can look into other options, okay?” he asks, a small smile playing on his lips.

I stay silent for a moment, letting the words sink in. “Okay.”

“Great, now that’s settled, here are the keys.” The attorney drops a set of three keys on a ring into my hand. “She owned an apartment upstairs from the bakery as well. The rent of the apartment is included in the rent for the shop. I need you to sign here.” He points to the blank line on the paper.

“She had an apartment?” I look at my uncle and he shrugs.

“News to me, sweetheart.”

I sign on the line and gather my belongings to leave the office, Uncle Rob in tow.

“Don’t be mad at Sheryl,” Uncle Rob says, patting my shoulder.

“I’m not mad at her. I just don’t understand her! Baking was her passion. I just worked there because it was a job and she let me eat stuff that wasn’t sold at night,” I scoff lightly. “What am I gonna do? She has employees and bills and everything else. I mean, did she handle all the finances or did she have someone to do that?”

We walk out into the sunny street and begin making our way toward the parking lot across the street.

“She has someone, a nice guy. His name is Dan. He’s been over with his wife and kids for dinner a few times. She also has someone who comes in and helps her bake in the mornings and another girl who helps with the front during the day. How about I take you over there this weekend and you can meet everyone? They are reopening on Saturday. I’ll do the introductions, and you can start getting a feel for the place.” He smiles, trying to reassure me.

“What about my job? I already have one of those with benefits and everything. I can’t uproot my life in the city to move out to the suburbs. What about Kevin?” I feel myself start to panic again thinking through all the changes that are about to happen.

“We’ll figure it all out. Now, go home, get some sleep, and I’ll see you in a few days, okay?” he asks, pulling me into a tight embrace.

“Yeah, I’ll see you in a few days.” I hug him back, but I’m not feeling any better about the situation at hand.

Getting into my car, I decide to drive over to the shop to have a look around. I park my car in front of the shop and get out to peer into the window. She wasn’t into technology, and the shop relied on people coming in to pick up their orders. She refused to have a website, insisting that it took away too much of the charm.

I press my face against the glass and smile, remembering all the summers of tasting the sweet treats and helping customers as they raved about how amazing everything tasted. Aunt Sheryl has, had, a way of resonating with people; she could make a room light up just by being in it. The shop has been closed since the funeral. She was well known in the community, as was evident by the turnout at the wake and funeral.

I look around at the chairs on the small tables, and the drink cooler to the right. Everything is exactly as it was the last time I was here. I close my eyes, picturing the happy customers coming to pick up treats for dessert or for a party. The shop was so full of life, and I can almost hear the bell over the door and Aunt Sheryl’s infectious laugh as she filled the cream puffs. Concentrating hard, I can smell the sugar in the air, the sweetness just enough to put a smile on someone’s face when they open the door. I ponder going in for a minute to have a look around but think better of it at the last second.

I open my eyes again to see the shop still empty and the lights still off. I groan inwardly as I think about how to run this place. First things first, I have to go home and talk with Kevin.

Tagging some friends: @theimpossibleg1rl @siren-kitten-his @katiew1973 @suz-123 @diinofayce @learisa @avenger-nerd-mom @princess-evans-addict @jewels2876 @loriwrites (I can never remember your other user name when I do this girlfriend) @devikafernando @tilltheendwilliwrite @4theluvofall @stuckyfox @lostinthoughtsandfeelings @221bshrlocked @winterwitch611

[lil-grunge-gal]

Head.Cars.Bending Part 1

-Jumin's pov-

I stare at the clock on the wall in my office, reading that it is 4:51. Only nine more minutes until I can leave for the day. My day at work was consisted of the same tedious tasks that I've grown accustomed to doing every other day. Paperwork, meetings, more paperwork. The workload is a bit heavier, since it is Assistant Kang's day off today. Although through out the day I have heard my cell phone vibrating in my desk drawer that has been in all day. I don't like to take out my phone during the work day because I see it as unprofessional. I didn't take a lunch break today since Assistant Kang hasn't been here and I needed to get stuff done so I had no time to check my phone.

I continue doing paperwork and feel another vibration from the drawer. I look at the clock again and see that it is 4:45.

I sigh and being to clean everything up.

What the hell is going on? Isn't everyone supposed to be at school or work? The only one who has an excuse to be in the chat room is Assistant Kang.

At 4:58 I begin to feel nauseous when it goes off again.

Relax, it's probably just Luciel gushing over chips, or Yoosung talking about that one game, LOLOL. More likely Zen posting selfies and Jaehee talking about how handsome and talented he is.

I laugh at the thought of Zen.

He and I constantly butt heads because of our lives, personalities, and different upbringings. Deep down, I care about Zen. I'm not sure if he feels the same though. Either way, the RFA wound not be the same without him.

My phone vibrates again.

Calm down, you are worrying over nothing.

I repeat it like a mantra until the clock reaches five.

I rip the drawer open and grab my phone.

27 missed calls and 123 text messages.

My heart beats faster like it's going to beat out of my chest. I decide to call Assistant Kang since she is the one who has called me the most.

The phone rings two times before she picks up.

"Mr. Han!" She exclaims, worry is easy to detect in her voice.

"What's wrong? What happened?" I ask, my eyebrows knotting together from worry and fear.

Jaehee's breath shudders as if she is not trying to break down and cry. This makes my heart drop further into worry and pain.

"It's Zen... he was in an accident on his motorcycle. It went off road and no one found him for a few hours. He is still alive, but in critical condition," Her voice breaks into a violent sob. "The-The doctors said they're not sure if he'll pull through."

My entire body goes numb from the new information. The only thing I can feel is the blood rushing to my head and the vomit in the back of my throat. "Zen?" Is the only thing I can mutter out.

Jaehee sniffs, "V, Luciel, Yoosung, and I are here waiting for any news since Zen doesn't have any family that's close."

I nod, but then realize that she can't see me, "I-I'll contact driver Kim to get me to the hospital. I'll see you soon."

"Alright, goodbye."

I hang up and then notice that I am shaking.

Why do you have to be such an idiot, Zen? Motorcycles are dangerous. I've told you that! Why do you ride them? What made you crash?

On my way out, I try to avoid any eye contact with other employees. I can't bring myself to hold a conversation with somebody at the moment. Just as I walk out the building front doors, I see driver Kim's car and hop in.

"Please take me to the Sky Hospital," I crock.

Driver Kim nods an starts driving.

Once we reach the building, I step out and look up.

This is my first time to a hospital in all my years of being alive. I have never been sick or injured and neither has anyone close to me. Well, until now...

I walk in and to the receptionist, "excuse me? Uh-what room is um Hyun Ryu?"

The woman types a few things in her computer and then turns back to me, "He is in room 214." The receptionist tells me.

I nod and make my journey to the room.

Once the elevator lets me off on the right floor, I am greeted with three pairs of sad eyes and not so happy smiles.

"Hey guys...how is he?" I immediately ask.

Luciel sighs, "he might pull through. He has two broken legs, four broken ribs, and internal bleeding. Also, uh-the doctor is talking to V right now in Zen's room in private about something."

My heart sinks with every word. Assistant Kang and Yoosung bursts into tears. Luciel pulls them both into a hug and they bury their face into his neck. I stand there awkwardly, trying to figure out away to comfort myself and then decide to go to the restroom.

I walk down the hall and step into the bathroom. I look at myself in the mirror and see how terrible I look. My hair is in all directions and I have dry tear stains when I slightly cried on the way to the hospital.

I scrub my face and brush my hand threw my hair. I sigh one more time and then walk back to where everyone else is. V is now out of Zen's room and looks like he was waiting for me.

"Jihyun?" I say, resting my hand on V's shoulder.

"Jumin," V greets back.

Poor V, he has already lost Rika and it has took a toll on him. Can he possibly handle losing Zen? Can I handle losing Zen?

I feel something funny in the back of my throat, like a lump. I try to swallow it down, but it comes back up at the thought of Zen not pulling through. The RFA members are practically family to me. If I lose one of them, I lose some of me.

V steps up close to me and places one of his hands on my left cheek, "Jumin, you crying."

I jerk away from V's touch and grab some tissues that are set on a low level table by my feet. I wipe my face and pray that the other members did not see me. According to Zen, I am a "stone cold robot" anyway.

God, what I wouldn't give for us to go back to our regular bickering. Why the hell couldn't I pull myself together? Get your shit together!

V looks at me, his eyes are full of concern and surprise. Even though we knew each other for over twenty years, he has never heard or seen me cry. Not even when Rika passed away.

"Jumin, tell me what's wrong." V says sternly.

I shake my head and more tears fall.

[myicelandblog-blog]

Pre-expectations vs Reality

In this section, you can first read about my expectations from Iceland before travelling there followed by the comparison I made after visiting the country.

PRE-EXPECTATIONS

Iceland is a country in the north side of Atlantic Ocean and it is located almost 1000kms away from the west of Norway and visiting this country has always been on my bucket list since I was a little child. The wild and beautiful nature of Iceland has always attracted me even though I am not really a cold weather person. (Maybe it’s because I am from a very warm country, I don’t really know) 

Everyone I know who had visited Iceland before seemed like they really enjoyed the country which always encouraged me to arrange a trip. The official language is Icelandic in the country and it is one of the oldest languages in the world which is still in use. Most of the locals can speak English fluently which is an opportunity for us.

Also, I have always been a big fan of Björk who is an Icelandic singer, songwriter, actress, record producer, and DJ. She released an album called “Homogenic” which was regarded as one of her most experimental albums and with the beats she used on this album, she tried to reflect the landscape of Iceland.

(You can listen to one of the popular songs from this incredible album below)

I have also been following an Instagram account devoted to sharing pictures from Iceland by the successful photographer Gunnar Freyr. The pictures he uploaded have always amazed me so far and helped me generate an idea about the life in Iceland in every month of the year. (You can find his account on www.instagram.com/icelandic_explorer/)

I believe that Iceland is a country where I should leave all of my prejudices before travelling and let myself enjoy whatever I come across during the trip. If we are not lucky enough to experience the northern lights, I will try and not let this make me upset and ruin the whole trip for me. I will try to see it as an opportunity to make a visit to Iceland again in the future. Also my past travel adventures have taught me that that I should not expect to be on time with the schedule all the time during the trip. Even though it is not an ideal situation, as a big group of people travelling around, it is so easy to fall behind the schedule and we should be ready to experience such things in advance.  

WEATHER

As we are planning to arrive in Reykjavík on the 6th of March one of the most important things I should take into consideration is the weather. Iceland is not a warm country at any time of the year, but the temperature is likely to be reasonable throughout the year as the Gulf Stream affects the weather in the region.

From October to April, it is known as the low season where there are less visitors compared to the other months of the year.  During the low season, there is only few hours of daylight and this situation increases the chance of catching and experiencing the famous Northern lights for the visitors.

When I think about Iceland, the first things that come to my mind are the freezing weather and the constant snow! However, according to some online resources, it does not really snow that much in the country, especially in Reykjavik. I find this fact kind of hard to believe. I think it will be freezing! When I have a look at the itinerary of the trip, I feel like I should try and find the warmest clothes and the most comfortable shoes before we go there.

ACCOMMODATION

During our trip, we are going to stay at Brimhótel which is a budget accommodation in Reykjavík. It seems very close to the famous Hallgrímskirkja Church and just a short walk from the main shopping area in the city. According to what I have found online about this accommodation, I should not have high expectations as there are both good and bad reviews from previous visitors. However, I have stayed at budget accommodations before and I believe that as long as I do not expect much from the facility and as long as they provide amenities to meet our basic needs, I will leave Iceland feeling quite content with the accommodation chosen.

PRICES

In Iceland, the money currency is “krona” (ISK) and the visitors can exchange their money at currency exchange offices. Also, ATMs can be found quite easily in the country as most of the locals prefer using credit or debit cards instead of carrying cash. Apart from the natural beauties the country has to offer for visitors, it also has a reputation for being incredibly expensive and this is a big concern for me. According to Guide to Iceland (2017), compared to the other Nordic capitals, hotel prices in Reykjavík is higher up to %32 percent compared to the other Nordic capitals; accommodation and restaurants are more expensive than the average in EU by 44%; and more interestingly, the prices of alcoholic drinks are higher up to 123%. As I am an exchange student from Turkey, even the prices in the UK are always so high for me. I can’t stop asking myself if I will be able to survive spending 4 days in Iceland without having to spend all the money that I have for my whole year in the UK.

REALITY

According to Arcodia & Dickson (2013), the field trips improve what is being taught in classrooms by providing real time experiences that are either different from or support the theoretical background. During the trip, we were able to observe Iceland as a country and analyse and compare our knowledge of the tourism industry in the area as a group of Tourism, Event and Hospitality students.  

Now that we came back to the UK from the dreamy country of Iceland, I am going to compare my expectations before going there with the reality I have faced with.

WEATHER: Before going to Iceland, I was expecting constant snow especially outside Reykjavik. The weather was freezing every single day we were there but not as much as I expected it to be. I was wearing many different layers and carrying hand warmers with me wherever we went to. However, I did not really use them because I did not need to. When we arrived in Reykjavik, it seemed like the weather had settled down and was only really cold but there was no snow. Also, I was quite surprised by the length of the daylight we had which was roughly 11 hours despite of the many sources I read stating there would only be 4-5 hours a day.

In addition, I was quite disappointed when we experienced the Northern Lights. This was because of the fact that my perceptions were shaped by the pictures shared on social media by the people and organisations in Iceland to promote tourism. Marketers use destination image to position destinations regarding competing ones and to differentiate them in the minds of travellers. Destination image is thus used as a promotional tool to gain a competitive advantage over other destinations. (Hosany, Ekinci and Uysal 2006; Morgan, Pritchard and Piggott 2002; cited by Michaelidou et al. 2013) The pictures used on the media were obviously augmented on different photography applications and what we saw in the sky was quite different from the images I saw of the Northern Lights before. In the pictures, the colours looked vibrant in a crazy way. I could see the green colour when I checked my camera’s gallery however my eyes only witnessed a grey curtain waving slowly in the sky.

ACCOMODATION: I really liked the Brim Hotel, our accommodation, where I had to share a room with 3 other people. I was quite nervous before the trip as I have never shared a room with other people before but the room was quite comfortable and my roommates were really friendly towards me. We had a bathroom in our room but also a communal WC and a bathroom outside our room on the same floor. We didn’t have to wait for each other as we could use them, too. There was a kitchen with everything we would have needed such as a microwave, oven, lots of plates, glasses and cutlery. They even provided some dry food for everyone in one of the cupboards. People who stayed at the same hotel seemed like students coming from other countries to explore Iceland as we were. I saw many people in the communal area working on maps, trying to plan their next day in Iceland to make the best of their trip. They were talking to the hotel staff to get advice on what to do and the staff seemed very helpful at all times. I may consider staying at the Brim Hotel again if I ever visit Reykjavik again.

CULTURE/LOCALS: Local people of Reykjavik seemed to have the cool and recognisable Nordic attitude similar to people coming from Sweden and Norway. Everyone I talked to could speak English rather fluently which was a great advantage for me even though the official language of the country is Icelandic. People I encountered seemed quite friendly, some tried to make small conversations asking where I am from, how long I was going to stay in Iceland, what my plans were, etc. when I was buying stuff from the souvenir shops in the city centre. Some even suggested galleries that I could visit.

According to the World Economic Forum (2018), Iceland, even though is an island, is not isolated from progress towards gender equality and has been the top country in gender equality index for the past 9 years. I am originally from Turkey and we are still fighting for women’s rights in so many occasions. When I saw women in every part of life in Iceland, I felt quite happy and wished the same for all the countries in the world.

FOOD: As I knew that Iceland is a very expensive country, I bought lots of dry food before flying there such as noodles, biscuits etc. I had a limited amount of money in my bank account and I decided to spend it on different things such as souvenirs other than food. However, I checked the menus at every single café and restaurant we have visited and I couldn’t stop myself but compared the prices with the UK and Turkey every single time. Fish seemed to be the most popular food in the island and lots of different kinds of fish could be found easily in cafes and restaurants if you have enough funds to afford it. If we look at this situation from a different perspective, people from less developed countries are less likely to visit Iceland due to high prices which may reduce the impacts of over-crowding in the long term.

NATURE/ATTRACTIONS: I was blown away by the natural beauties when I first visited Norway, basically I couldn’t believe my eyes and Iceland reminded me of Norway in so many ways. After visiting a couple of different waterfalls, I found myself saying “Oh, another waterfall? They all look the same to be honest” in a jesting way but in fact I was amazed by all of them. I had the chance to take amazing pictures and this made me very happy as I am interested in photography as an amateur.

REFERENCES:

Arcodia, C., & Dickson, C. (2013). Tourism field studies: Experiencing the carnival of Venice. Journal of Hospitality and Tourism Education, 25(3). 

Hosany, Sameer, Yuksel Ekinci and Muzaffer Uysal (2006). “Destination Image and Destination Personality: An Application of Branding Theories to Tourism Places.” Journal of Business Research, 59: 638-642

Michaelidou, N. , Siamagka, N-T. , Moraes, C. and Micevski, M. (2013) Do marketers use visual representations of destinations that tourists value? Comparing visitors' image of a destination with marketer-controlled images online. Journal of Travel Research, volume 52 (6): 789-804. DOI: 10.1177/0047287513481272

Morgan, Nigel, Annette Pritchard and Rachel Piggott (2002). “New Zealand, 100% Pure-The Creation of a Powerful Niche Destination Brand.” The Journal of Brand Management, 9: 335-354.

World Economic Forum. (2018). This is why Iceland ranks first for gender equality. [online] Available at: https://www.weforum.org/agenda/2017/11/why-iceland-ranks-first-gender-equality/ [Accessed 13 Mar. 2018].

[xabiyoko]

Do it, Xabier. Answer the questions. ¡Todas las preguntas, por favor!

OMG an Anon, hi!!!! An a spanish speaking one at that!

1. Who was the last person you held hands with?

My partner.

2. Are you outgoing or shy?

Shy as fuuuck.

3. Who are you looking forward to seeing?

Tomorrow I’m going to a friend’s concert, so I’m looking forward to that.

4. Are you easy to get along with?

No, I mean I think so, but my lack of friends indicates otherwise.

5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you?

Sure, but I don’t drink.

6. What kind of people are you attracted to?

Emotionally unavailable women!!!! Also, hippies and freelovers.

7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now?

I hope.

8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind?

My partner.

9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable?

Depending on with whom, but not necessarily. It makes me uncomfortable to talk about sex explicitly, sometimes.

10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with?

My partner, deep conversations are our thing,

11. What does the most recent text that you sent say?

yo voy a un concierto mañana a las 7, sorry.

12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now?

Mad World, Shallow, Ocean Eyes, Royals, and No Time to Die.

13. Do you like it when people play with your hair?

I love it.

14. Do you believe in luck and miracles?

Nope.

15. What good thing happened this summer?

It’s been like 4 days, so not much.

16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?

Yep.

17. Do you think there is life on other planets?

Sure, we can’t possibly be the only ones here.

18. Do you still talk to your first crush?

Nope, it’s been some 4-5 years.

19. Do you like bubble baths?

I LOVE.

20. Do you like your neighbors?

I have no relationship with them.

21. What are you bad habits?

I answer badly when I’m tired/stressed.

22. Where would you like to travel?

Canada! The Pacific Northwest.

23. Do you have trust issues?

Oh boy do I... But I’m working on them.

24. Favorite part of your daily routine?

Going to sleep.

25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with?

My stomach. I struggle a lot with people touching it, it’s been an issue lately.

26. What do you do when you wake up?

I open my phone and play Harry Potter Hogwarts Mystery for 12 minutes, more or less.

27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker?

I don’t give two shits tbh.

28. Who are you most comfortable around?

My partner and some of my friends.

29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up?

Nope.

30. Do you ever want to get married?

YES.

31. If your hair long enough for a pony tail?

Biiiitch, I can make two ponytails, it’s been almost 3 years since I last cut my hair.

32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with?

I honestly find a threesome would be really stressful, so... none? hahahah Maybe like idk, Jason Momoa and Christina Hendricks.

33. Spell your name with your chin.

cxvasdbvciouewre

34. Do you play sports? What sports?

I swim every day, and I play basketball by myself, like a good depressed boy.

35. Would you rather live without TV or music?

Without music for sure.

36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them?

Of course, although eventually I tend to open my fucking mouth.

37. What do you say during awkward silences?

Awkwaaaaaaaaard.

38. Describe your dream girl/guy?

Big smile and thick thighs!

39. What are your favorite stores to shop in?

I don’t like to shop.

40. What do you want to do after high school?

hahaha I wanted to be a teacher, and here I am.

41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance?

Sorry no, some people don’t, I’m sorry.

42. If your being extremely quiet what does it mean?

That I’m all hot and bothered, probably angry, I like to let it simmer and eat me up inside.

43. Do you smile at strangers?

Only when they have dogs.

44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean?

Outer space, I think. The bottom of the ocean is hella scary.

45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning?

My alarm?

46. What are you paranoid about?

I guess about other people’s feelings towards me? Link this with the trust issues thing earlier.

47. Have you ever been high?

Nope, maybe next saturday for the first time?

48. Have you ever been drunk?

I have, although not in a while.

49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about?

Not really.

50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore?

Black.

51. Ever wished you were someone else?

Yep, regularly tbh

52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself?

My appearance?

53. Favourite makeup brand?

Maybe it’s Maybelline? 

54. Favourite store?

The corner store where I buy bread, the lady is super nice.

55. Favourite blog?

Yours, whoever you are.

56. Favourite colour?

PURPLE.

57. Favourite food?

I have trouble with this question, but I’d say Watermelon, nothing tastes better.

58. Last thing you ate?

Apples and yoghurt.

59. First thing you ate this morning?

An apple.

60. Ever won a competition? For what?

I won a sjoelen competition two or three years ago in the hotel I stayed at with my grandma and mom.

61. Been suspended/expelled? For what?

Never.

62. Been arrested? For what?

Never.

63. Ever been in love?

I think?

64. Tell us the story of your first kiss?

My leg was broken, I think, and my arm was wrapped in something for some reason. We were watching “El Penalty Más Largo del Mundo”, and after the end, I went for it.

65. Are you hungry right now?

Nope, I’m having dinner.

66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends?

YES.

67. Facebook or Twitter?

Twitter.

68. Twitter or Tumblr?

Tumblr.

69. Are you watching tv right now?

Not tv but a tv show, Insecure

70. Names of your bestfriends?

I don’t have one.

71. Craving something? What?

Touch?

72. What colour are your towels?

Purple, Black and Pink.

72. How many pillows do you sleep with?

Two.

73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals?

Sometimes? My purple care bear.

74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have?

A LOT, like A LOT. They don’t fit on my bed, they don’t fit under my bed, they don’t fit in my wardrobe.

75. Favourite animal?

The honeybadger!

76. What colour is your underwear?

Black, always.

77. Chocolate or Vanilla?

Chocolate.

78. Favourite ice cream flavour?

Speculoos.

79. What colour shirt are you wearing?

Blue.

80. What colour pants?

Blue.

81. Favourite tv show?

Boy Meets World.

82. Favourite movie?

Stardust.

83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2?

Mean Girls.

84. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street?

Mean Girls.

85. Favourite character from Mean Girls?

Regina.

86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo?

The starfish.

87. First person you talked to today?

My partner.

88. Last person you talked to today?

My partner.

89. Name a person you hate?

My partner? No, just kidding. I haaaaaate... I don’t hate anyone, I think.

90. Name a person you love?

My partner.

91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now?

Not really.

92. In a fight with someone?

Nope.

93. How many sweatpants do you have?

Three, two black, one gray.

94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have?

Three, I think. One black, one blue, one white.

95. Last movie you watched?

The Public’s Much Ado About Nothing

96. Favourite actress?

I don’t think I have one.

97. Favourite actor?

I don’t think I have one.

98. Do you tan a lot?

Sadly, I do.

99. Have any pets?

My partner’s dog, who just peed in my bedroom today.

100. How are you feeling?

Tired.

101. Do you type fast?

Yes, if I say so myself.

102. Do you regret anything from your past?

A lot of stuff.

103. Can you spell well?

I think so, although the most simple of words gives me problems.

104. Do you miss anyone from your past?

Does my grandpa count?

105. Ever been to a bonfire party?

YES! Every summer in Romania, not this one tho :(

106. Ever broken someone’s heart?

I hope not, but I guess?

107. Have you ever been on a horse?

Yes.

108. What should you be doing?

Sleeping?

109. Is something irritating you right now?

Not really.

110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt?

I don’t think so.

111. Do you have trust issues?

Again? Yep.

112. Who was the last person you cried in front of?

My parents.

113. What was your childhood nickname?

I had sooooo many. 

114. Have you ever been out of your province/state?

Yep.

115. Do you play the Wii?

I love it.

116. Are you listening to music right now?

Nope.

117. Do you like chicken noodle soup?

I don’t eat noodles, so I guess not.

118. Do you like Chinese food?

I LOVE Chinese food, give me ALL of it. Not all of them because you know ED and all that, but other than noodles and rice, all of it.

119. Favourite book

Isla and the Happily Ever After.

120. Are you afraid of the dark?

A little bit?

121. Are you mean?

A lot bit? I am sometimes, but I’m working on it.

122. Is cheating ever okay?

No. How about you taaaaaalk about your feelings, bro?

123. Can you keep white shoes clean?

No. When I was little my mum used to tell me not to buy white clothes because they were “too dirty”. It turns out I was the “too dirty” one.

124. Do you believe in love at first sight?

No.

125. Do you believe in true love?

Yes

126. Are you currently bored?

Nope.

127. What makes you happy?

Feeling comfortable with people makes me happy.

128. Would you change your name?

Nope.

129. What your zodiac sign?

Cancer.

130. Do you like subway?

The food? Yes. The mode of transportation? Not in times of Corona

131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?

Tell her it’s okay and that it’ll pass. Also, I’m not shit, so yeah.

132. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with?

My partner.

133. Favourite lyrics right now?

All of Ocean Eyes.

134. Can you count to one million?

I don’t have that kind of time.

135. Dumbest lie you ever told?

Someone called home to tell me I had to go play football, and I answered I wasn’t home.

136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed?

Closed at home, open with my partner because of the dog.

137. How tall are you?

Not at all. 1,70. 

138. Curly or Straight hair?

Mine? Curly, although it got straight when I dyed it. In other people? I like it straight.

139. Brunette or Blonde?

I have brown hair, although now it’s purple/pink. I like blondes and girls with black black hair.

140. Summer or Winter?

Winter

141. Night or Day?

Night

142. Favourite month?

I hate all months the same.

143. Are you a vegetarian?

No, althought it seems like it sometimes.

144. Dark, milk or white chocolate?

Dark-ish.

145. Tea or Coffee?

I used to be coffee all day, but now after quarantine I’m more of a tea kind of guy.

146. Was today a good day?

It was a day, not good or bad.

147. Mars or Snickers?

I dislike both tbh.

148. What’s your favourite quote?

‘Do you fall in love often?’ Yes often. With a view, with a book, with a dog, a cat, with numbers, with friends, with complete strangers, with nothing at all. — Jeanette Winterson

149. Do you believe in ghosts?

No.

150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page? 

mejor que mil insultos posibles y mi imaginación, mucho más fructífera que la de mis haters, que se limitaban a criticar mi aspecto, mi ropa, lo dispuesta que parecía a cualquier práctica obscena con David.

[bsternberg26]

Sports Media Internship [BSM307]

Preparedness prior to commencing the internship and assimilation into the organisational culture

One of the keystones for educational institutions offering students internship programs is the transitional experience from the classroom to the workplace, where interns absorb practical knowledge and skills alongside common workplace skills (Maertz et al. 2013).

As I have stated in previous Tumblr entries for earlier subjects, the internship program at Holmesglen was unashamedly the driving reason for me enrolling in the sports media degree in the first place.

Now that I’ve begun the second semester and internship program is upon us, I’m excited and nervous at the same time.

Following on from the ‘Transitioning to Professional Practice’ subject we had in semester one, I’ve been utilising many of the tips and interviewing skills we’ve learned throughout semester one while applying for the position descriptions (which I have found quite daunting).

I had plenty of anxieties after submitting my CV’s but having secured six interviews from the eight internships I applied for, I am feeling quite confident about myself heading into the internship itself.

Some of the feedback I have received regarding my experiences I’ve sought outside of the degree has been really positive. In fact, one of the organisations said I was the perfect candidate and that my CV’s was the standout ‘by the length of Flemington straight. One of my primary concerns during my time at Holmesglen has been securing opportunities outside of my studies to set myself apart from the other students, so that feedback meant a lot.

‘When a recruiter receives hundreds of those bulleted documents, that most probably look and read the same, it can be really difficult to know how to make yours, you and your credentials for the job stand out among the masses’ (Blair 2019, para. 3).

I believe I’ve put myself in the best position to perform and succeed as I enter the scary and exciting sports media industry.

It was an absolute pleasure for me to be offered a hybrid internship involving my top 2 preferences: Rainmaker and SEN. It’s an opportunity I jumped at and it has worked out better than getting one internship one or the other in my opinion.

I’ve begun my internship at Rainmaker quite nervously I must admit. The internship was one of the driving forces for me enrolling in the degree in the first place and now I’m here, it’s quite surreal.

The first few days I typically found myself twiddling my thumbs a bit as a look to find my feet, but I really feel like I’ve blended into the culture at Rainmaker. Obviously, I share interests with the employees there (sports and broadcast production), but even still I’ve been made to feel very welcome.

I made some mistakes, but I’ve received great encouragement while being shown the ropes. As I move forward with the first half of my internship, I’m a bit concerned as to how I’m going to get the 114 hour mark. The plan is hopefully to get an opportunity to work in the studio and create a small program myself so that I have something to show for my time, and something to soak up my time.

                                             Reference List

Blair, O 2019, 8 hiring experts on how to make your CV stand out, viewed August 8 2020, https://www.cosmopolitan.com/uk/worklife/careers/advice/a33054/how-to-make-cv-stand-out/.

Maertz, P, Stoeberl, C & Marks, J 2014, ‘Building successful internships: lessons from the research for interns, schools, and employers’, Career Development International, vol. 19, no. 1, pp. 123-142, viewed August 8 2020, https://d1wqtxts1xzle7.cloudfront.net/46895517/Building_successful_internships_lessons_20160629-7050-1i7jdyz.pdf?1467232230=&response-content-disposition=inline%3B+filename%3DBuilding_successful_internships_lessons.pdf&Expires=1596861812&Signature=H52uEpN4p-tp6qtUld3zeHzcARPyIYFEx1j1MKFuM0FCY-wUlkZorM3TFP3cRiE5eBkiCqcyHeo2TkbM5MEyvZXOww04VY1ZreR00GBNM8z9rfZAEybgbrMUlNwKyHSBEXDO6v6OBfnWwlD9CLjdaoOkamPp9foSgODfRXXJZtnLGJg7TA9hvBxiPac4S5MG1KVDJgqebFx4ckSuevAOo0G8M8l93mvs7nW0Os8ARqjTCOr45wU4fgnFoU8oVpC5yilH-dLQ8tsrfslaD17QA68lGxfnaVdrVY9D9TJ-uOevTtBXfVrMyqpuFf0BpVit87PG2eH4jYzvCf2RX~EJOA__&Key-Pair-Id=APKAJLOHF5GGSLRBV4ZA

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Finding my feet in the internship and completing initial tasks (i.e. first 40 hours)

The transition from lecture rooms into the workplace can be stressful, as students may struggle to understand their role and responsibilities initially in new environments. According to van der Zwet et al. (2011) while being newcomers to the workplace, students can take time to become accustom to rules, professional hierarchies and interactions within the new workplace environment.  

My first few days and shifts at Rainmaker have been rather enjoyable, if not eye opening. Somewhat surprisingly, I have been working in house as oppose to remotely, which I’ve been grateful for. Having the chance to meet all the crew and be shown where everything happens (tv production, radio etc) was great, including having my own desk.

Most of my first few hours at Rainmaker were spent learning the ropes. David, Kane and Hayden showed me many tricks they do in terms of capturing visuals. My first task was to go through their program and record all the games through the end of the season (from halfway through round 15 to 17) so all vision required for promos/highlights etc where in the system. The guys also put me to task on capturing some goal highlights from Melbourne’s Christian Petracca from a game that previous weekend, which they were pretty happy with.

All in all, the guys I met through my first couple of shifts have helped me settle into the organisation structure really well, and I continue to meet more employees who all seem to be great guys and girls.

One of the first programs I was a part of was a pre-recorded program for a technology company called ABB. I played the role of the Electronic Visual System (EVS), playing the visuals and still graphics when prompted. I had to keep everybody alert as to when each clip would end, shouting down from 10, which I felt a little bit silly doing.

The first live broadcast we did was the Healesville Cup, which appeared live on the Greyhound Racing Victoria Facebook page. While I didn’t play too much of a role whilst on air, I did work with the graphics, renaming them so they distinguishable and putting in order to replicate the rundown sheet. Watching the broadcast live and seeing the scheduled rundown get thrown about was quite interesting to watch.

https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=232442071526836

I also got my hands dirty with a couple of other programs, including The Winners (hosted by Jack Heverin) and the Essendon Football Club best and fairest award. During The Winners, my role was as floor manager, where I ushered the talent from ‘the background’ to the plasma when time come for their segment.

The best thing for me was to experience having the headset on and trying to sort stuff out on the floor while having somebody yell at me through my earpiece from the control room.

For the Essendon B&F I was in charge of the teleprompter, which I really enjoyed. Although there was a moment where I forget to prompt host Julien De Stoop that we were throwing to a graphic (which can be seen in the video below at 23:09).

I’m learning more and more and Rainmaker, and I truly appreciate the guys making me feel as welcome as they have. It’s time for me now though to become more proactive and ask questions and keep myself busy to get the best out of the opportunity Rainmaker have afforded me.

                                               Reference List

van der Zwet, J, Zwietering, P, Teunissen, P, van der Vleuten, C & Scherpbier, A 2011, ‘Workplace learning from a socio-cultural perspective: creating developmental space during the general practice clerkship’, Maastricht University, viewed 24 September 2020, file:///C:/Users/Brent/Downloads/Zwet2011_Article_WorkplaceLearningFromASocio-cu.pdf.                                                       

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Being an effective team member, contributor, building confidence & being efficient

Kira & Balkin (2014) discuss how individual identity can make an impact on the organizational environment as employees attempt to achieve alignment between work identity and work environment.

To that end, I have endeavored to portray myself as a willing contributor during the early hours of my internship at Crocmedia. While I feel like I have blended in to the group of people that work at Crocmedia (Rainmaker in particular) well, trying to be an effective team member has been somewhat of a challenge.

Like in most workplace environments there is of course already an established hierarchy, with everybody playing their own role. This is particularly important in television production obviously, especially during live broadcasts. As such, I have found myself sitting on the sidelines a little bit during broadcasts while only performing what I would describe as periphery tasks. It’s not quite an environment where I can use my initiative to do my own thing, in fact sometimes all I feel I can do is ask individuals if there’s anything I can help with (and sometimes there is).

Having said that, I am certainly getting more and more confident with some of the tasks I’ve been set that I’ve done multiple times. The floor management role I’ve had on our Saturday mornings has been great, and I’ve grown in confidence since my first attempt managing where to go.

Becoming more confident in this regard has ultimately helped shape me into a better contributor who can be trusted to do what I have to.

While I have been shown a myriad of other roles, I feel as though I have not yet really had the opportunity to sink my teeth into them. In all honesty, this has left me a bit frustrated as I do get the sense that the director and producer (Kane and David) want to ask me to lend a hand with something, but pull short of asking because they’re unsure if I can do it (which of course is true when I haven’t had a sufficient go at those particular roles).

One definitive example of this was during the pre-recorded Cox Plate program when I was asked to copy some questions that had come through for the talent via Twitter onto the teleprompt. Once the email come through I chucked them in and was good to go, until I was told to go and collect the pieces of paper from the printer with the questions on them and give them to the talent.

Maybe the producer just thought that was the better thing to do, but I already had them in the teleprompt and am capable using it, so I’m not quite sure what to think.

I know moving forward we’re set to learn some other great skills which we’ll need to learn and I’m excited for.

So far I’ve been punctual, approachable, I’ve done whatever I’ve been asked to do, and I’ve been efficient doing it. Both Kane and David have assured both myself and the other intern we’re doing a great job, which I hope they mean sincerely as I know I’m capable of much more they’ve asked me, Brent, an effective an reliable team member, thus far.

                                             Reference List

Kira, M & Balkin, D 2014, ‘Interactions between work and identities: Thriving, withering, or redefining the self?’, Human Resource Management Review, vol. 24, no. 2, pp. 131-143, viewed 7 September 2020, EBSCOhost Database.

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Challenges (the nature of the work, working hours, motivation, tabling of ideas)

‘The application of strong measures of time control is paramount for the attainment of our organization goals because it has an inverse relationship with self-management, productivity and environment’ (Rombe 2016, p. 204).

One of the major skills I have developed during my time at Holmesglen has been juggling the degree requirements with personal responsibilities. Early in the degree it become apparent to me that I was going to have to obtain a diary and note everything I need to do on a weekly basis throughout the semester and be organised for once in my life. Throughout the early hours and weeks of my internship, time management has been paramount despite proving tricky.

In recent weeks I’ve been in at Crocmedia for 6 -8 shifts, which of course has meant I’ve had to designate time within a week to nail uni assessments rather than do what I need to do at any time during that particular week. With a myriad of commitments going on late in the semester (internship, assessments and my weekly radio show), my time management skills have been tested during the final semester of the degree.

While in it at Rainmaker, the time spent there seems to be either hectic or mellow. There doesn’t seem to be much in between. Much of the time is spent prepping for the shows and webinars a few hours before hand, and then live broadcasting (that’s the hectic part). There’s been some downtime during my time there where I’ve had the opportunity to tick of some uni stuff, which has been invaluable.

The last few weeks where my internships at Rainmaker and SEN have proven difficult, not just with time management but so many knew things to learn. Unlike Rainmaker, I’m not in the building for SEN, so everything is done virtually including the instructions I receive through their communications channel ‘Slack’. This has proven difficult because obviously it’s not like face-to-face communications where I can be shown and ask questions. This has proven extremely difficult trying to grasp information and I get the feeling the frustration is mutual, which has led to my reflectance of tabling ideas for yarns and overall motivation.

Heryati (n.d.) discusses how positive communication within the workplace is key to employee motivation, not merely relying communications via email but also on a personal level.

I feel as though I’ve given a good account of myself during the degree, achieving great results on many assessments and managing to keep my motivation levels high. However, as we head towards the end of the semester and the halfway point of the internship, my motivation is beginning to wane. I think with the end of the semester nearing, the hectic end to the semester and the way the year has unfolded (or more like unraveled) all play into the fact I feel burnt out approaching the end of the year and degree.

I feel incredibly lucky that I’ve been able to be one of the few students allowed to go in to the internship headquarters and work alongside professionals. This indeed has been incredibly valuable, and I don’t struggle for motivation once in the building. But with the heavy workload and the slight underwhelmed feeling I’ve been left with during the internship, I’m longing for the finish line.

                                               Reference List  

Heryati, R n.d., Why Employee Motivation Is Important (& How to Improve It), viewed 25 October 2020, https://inside.6q.io/employee-motivation-important/

Rombe, M 2016, ‘Effective Time and Self-Management, Environment and Productivity in an Organization’, Science Journal of Business and Management, vol. 4, No. 6, pp. 204-211, viewed 25 October 2020, EBSCOhost Database.                                                            

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Achievements and milestones both technically and professionally

‘Recognition often is the fuel to motivation, which in turn creates success for a business’ (Daihl 2018, para. 1).

As I approach the midway point of my internship there have several instances that I consider personal achievements within the organisations I’ve worked with.

With Rainmaker in particular, I’ve received positive face-to-face feed back after a lot of the little tasks I’ve been given have been completed. One of the live streamed shows we did for the spring racing carnival was a show called ‘Ladies Night In’ for the Ladbrokes Cox Plate. My role during the show was to chauffer the guests to the desk but to also place and remove props within the given segments (and there were a lot of props).

There were times when I only had 60 seconds to get props into and out of the shot, so it was imperative that I familiarised myself with the rundown and didn’t muck it up. Afterwards, the director Darcy told me he wouldn’t have been so stressed about it if he’d known how quick and productive I was. It wasn’t a big challenge for me personally, but it was the act of going through the rundown (the likes of which I’d only seen since commencing the internship) and prepping for when it was time to do what I had to.

Afterwards, I was thanked and congratulated by the whole team, which made me feel like it had all goon smoothly (which is the best thing that could be said I suppose).

With the SEN digital team, one of the real thrills of the internship has been having some of my work published and my name appear on the website. It’s bizarre to think that I’ve contributed to a website which I have long been a member of the audience. While I’ve done a bit of work individually outside of the degree that has spread my name a touch, it’s still a novelty that won’t wear off for a while.

While working with the digital guys at SEN I’ve also been in charge of time coding (for future quoting reference) and tracking our social posts (making sure we hit sponsored content targets). When I’ve completed this, supervisor Nic has given me some nice feedback, telling me how hopefully this has been. I’ve found that doing a good job with something that really helps the team has boosted my confidence to the point where I’m feeling more comfortable engaging with everyone in the messaging system we use called Slack.

Working with a lot of these audio and tech wizards has also benefitted me in regard to creating my own content. There’s been several tricks of the trade I’ve learnt from Kane at Rainmaker in regard to the Adobe programs we use (namely Photoshop and Premier Pro) that have been vital.

As such, I’ve been able to implement some of these tips both for assessment purposes and with my own radio content, too, so that my work I create looks like I know what I’m doing (which might nit have been the case beforehand).

                                         Reference List

Daihl, J 2018, Why is it important to celebrate milestones at work?, viewed 9 November 2020, https://ideas.baudville.com/the-baudville-blog/why-is-it-important-to-celebrate-milestones-at-work.                                                         

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Career aspirations including goal setting (and reflections on submitting 2 real world job applications)

‘By setting sharp, clearly defined goals, you can measure your progress and continuously motivate yourself to progress toward the vision you have for your ideal work life’ (Berkely para. 20).

My career objection upon enrolling in the degree at Holmesglen has been to become a respected sports broadcaster within the sports media industry. All the decisions I have made during my three years at Holmesglen, from the effort I put into practical assessments, to opportunities taken outside of the degree and internship placements.

I’ve known for a while that the industry I’m looking to work in have two key entry points: knowing somebody who is already established within industry and climbing the ladder (i.e. with an advanced portfolio of work). All of the guest speakers we’ve had confirmed this, so I’ve set about building my portfolio. While I don’t know anybody personally in the industry, my contacts have grown substantially since enrolling in the degree.

One of my first goals was to begin calling the football at a local level to showcase my ability first to the people immediately around me (co-callers, friends and family that might listen etc). Long term my goal will be to build a portfolio of calls I think are good enough draw attention from commercial radio stations.

My other goal to host my own radio program has kicked off this year too with my weekly NFL show on the same station. Again, the idea was (and continues to be) to build a show from scratch that is produced, hosted and disseminated by myself.

To have these two opportunities to call and host are my small steps to bigger opportunities in the future.

For the purposes of this assessment, I applied for two job applications that are in the realm of work I see myself doing post the degree.

The first position I applied for was as an overnight announcer on the Sports Entertainment Network. Being completely honest, I know I’m not qualified as things currently stand, however this is a position I can see myself doing in the future. Also, I know that if I continue along the path I am with calling football games and hosting/producing my own show, I will have the capabilities to apply again the future. My goal is that at such time I am better equipped and a more obvious candidate to e picked from the applicants.

The second position I applied for was a journalism position for the paper in my home town of Ballarat (The Courier). Full disclosure, I’m not an avid writer. During my time at Holmesglen I’ve written plenty for both my website and online site The Roar to showcase my writing capabilities, but journalism is not necessarily something I wish to do for a living.

This was another position I wasn’t qualified for, but again I know that I’m going to be qualified for opportunities like these within a year or two. The fact I haven’t heard back (at least not at the time of writing) from the organisations doesn’t deter me. The most important thing from my point of view is to continue to build my portfolio, and applying for these positions, if nothing, is a chance for me to showcase that to potential future employers.

                                            Reference List

Berkely, 2020, Goal-Setting: Developing a Vision & Goals for Your Career Plan, viewed 12 November 2020, https://hr.berkeley.edu/development/career-development/goal-setting/career-plan-vision.                                                        

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Supervisor evaluations and future career professional development requirements

‘A positive workplace culture improves teamwork, raises the morale, increases productivity and efficiency, and enhances retention of the workforce’ (Agerwal 2018, para. 1).

One of the most difficult things I’ve experience during the internship has been fitting into the Rainmaker organisation and trying to transition from being a student to a working professional. Trying to find my feet within the organisation was always going to be tricky, but if I’m to be completely honest with myself, there have been moments during the internship where I’ve been a bit like a deer in the headlights.

Some of the feedback I’ve received from David Kennedy and Kane Grimster has reflected this. The feedback has called for me to be more proactive in asking questions in what is obviously a fast-paced environment. I believe this feedback to be fair, although I don’t feel like the environment is conducive to asking questions when under the pump. That is to say that, given how I feel with some of the personalities in the room at Rainmaker, I’ve more content to sit and wait for instructions rather than seek out things to do. 

In the early days within the Rainmaker organisation I really did feel like a fish out of water. Being amongst working professionals who I’ve seen on television and heard on the radio took me a while to get use to. As a result, there were a few tasks I was given early that I wasn’t sure if they really wanted me to do or not.

‘Essentially, confidence is knowing what you’re good at, the value you provide, and acting in a way that conveys that to those around you’ (Kaplan Education 2020, para. 30).

Moving forward as a working professional, I really do feel like this internship has taught me I need to more self-assured within the working environment. Perhaps this was the experience I needed to realise perhaps I can be more confident in a professional environment. I’ve been a capable and high achieving student and it’s taken me too long to translate that to the workplace.

There’s also been a part of me that’s had to be resilient in the sense that I’ve seen the internship supervisors gel more with the other interns as oppose to myself. While this obviously disappointing, I’m using it as a lesson learnt in terms of how different workplace cultures work and how different personalities integrate within established environments.

I don’t think they guys at Rainmaker would agree that perhaps other interns have been prioritised over me, but that’s how I’ve felt at times.

Moving forward, having the chance to intern at Rainmaker, as well as work with the SEN digital team online, has taught me some really great lessons about the profession and how to be professional. It’s also taught me some lessons that I’d rather not have learned (such as feeling inferior and useless at times), but I feel like all these things are lessons I needed to learn.

I do take solace in the fact that the feedback received from David and Kane has noted my positive work ethic and attitude, because these are two things I bring constantly to any situation that I think are baseline requirements. It’s amazing how far these two traits can get you, and I’m sure these, along with professional lessons learned so far in the internship, will serve me well in the future also.

                                        Reference List

Agarwal, P 2018, How To Create A Positive Workplace Culture, viewed 16 November 2020, https://www.forbes.com/sites/pragyaagarwaleurope/2018/08/29/how-to-create-a-positive-work-place-culture/?sh=4ff5f90b4272.

Kaplan Education, 2020, What is confidence in the workplace important and how do I improve mine?, viewed 16 November 2020, https://www.kaplanprofessional.edu.au/blog/why-is-confidence-in-the-workplace-important-and-how-do-i-improve-mine/.

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Overall reflections on the internship and studies from starting the degree (i.e. how have my objectives/ambitions changed? Or not?)

‘Professional development refers to many types of educational experiences related to an individual’s work. Doctors, lawyers, educators, accountants, engineers, and people in a wide variety of professions and businesses participate in professional development to learn and apply new knowledge and skills that will improve their performance on the job’ (Mizell 2010, p, 3).

It’s quite daunting when I think back to the period in my life when I first contemplated enrolling in the sports media degree, to officially enrolling and entrenching myself back in the education system again. When I left school in 2011, it was never my intention to return to any form of education in the future, and yet here I was moving away from home and enrolling in a degree that I hoped would set me up for a career in the sports media profession.

I remember early on in the degree Sam Duncan told us that there were often students who would enter the degree with a particular goal or career path in mind, and by the end of the three years their goals had changed entirely. I recall pondering if this would happen to me, as I had entered with a pretty clear vision of me becoming a respected sports broadcaster.

As such, all of the decision I’ve made throughout the degree have been with the intention of achieving this goal.

From an academic standpoint, I am extremely proud of what I’ve achieved these past three years at Holmesglen. After being out of school for six years and never having written an academic essay in my life, I feel I become one of the strongest performing students academically of my cohort. Honestly, his even surprised me.

The crown jewel of the degree, that being the internship, has been a great learning curve for me. To work in a professional environment alongside savvy professional, to building connections in an industry that relies so heavily on them has been instrumental. If I was to say I’ve enjoyed the internship as much as I’d hoped from the perception I had from the outset of the degree I’d be lying, but I really have learnt some wonderful things and some harsh lessons about organisation culture and just induvial personalities within cultures.

During the degree I’ve learnt some fantastic technical skills that I’ve always been wanting to do but never really got around to. Skills like using photoshop, premier pro for video production and Audition for audio/podcast creation which are skills that are non-negotiable for sports media professionals of the day. These skills have already been put to good use with individual endeavors outside of the degree coursework.

Personally, the third year of the degree has been quite a struggle for many different reasons. The main being the fact we’ve gone online and, although I’ve seemed to have coped with that change well, the last few weeks of the degree felt like a real drag. I always feared that I would limp to the finish line and feel burnt, and that’s exactly what happened. I’m disappointed with this only because of the high standards I’ve set for myself throughout the degree.

And now the hard work begins. My expectations throughout the degree have been that I wouldn’t get a job straight after, and that certainly won’t happen now given the circumstances. But the opportunities I have set up for myself post the degree have me in a good position to succeed as a sports media graduate entering the profession.

                                               Reference List

Mizell, H 2010, Why professional development matters, viewed 17 November 2020, https://learningforward.org/wp-content/uploads/2017/08/professional-development-matters.pdf.

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                                 Quarter Times entry 

My internship experience has truly been a blast, an experience that has given me countless moments where I’ve needed to pinch myself to check that I am in fact still in reality.

The internship was probably the driving force behind me enrolling in the sports media degree in the first place, and from the outset I was really keen to work with SEN if the opportunity arose.

And so when I received an invitation to join the guys at Crocmedia to work with the TV production team at Rainmaker and the SEN digital gang, I was pretty excited (the company changed its moniker from Crocmedia to The Sports Entertainment Network while I was there, but I swear this had nothing to do with me).

One of the things I really enjoyed during the internship was the ability to actually go into the building while most other students didn’t have this luxury. To walk into the dining area and see Gerard Whateley munching on his endives with shrimp salad in one corner and Damien Barrett in the other downing his waldorf salad with pickled couscous was quite surreal.

To see how the guys at Rainmaker worked around COVID restrictions was really interesting, including working with hosts and guests coming through Zoom and only allowed a handful in the studio itself.

Personally, I really enjoyed working on the pre-match broadcasts we did for a few teams, including the Western Bulldogs, St. Kilda and Geelong (all of whom lost the next game, but I had nothing to do with this either, I swear).

I also had the pleasure of working on some live broadcasts which were absolutely bonkers hectic, but fun. We did ‘Winners’ and ‘Thrill of the Chase’, with my job being the runner, ushering talent on and off the desk and basically telling people where to go (which I found out I’m good at).

With SEN digital, it’s been a thrill to have my name published on a website for whom I’ve consumed plenty of content over the years. I look forward to having the opportunity to writing more and having randoms on Twitter telling me I’m an idiot.

I’ve loved my time at Holmesglen, I’ve loved my internship experiences at SEN and I loved watching the tiges win the flag again.

Goodbye Holmesglen, I’m off into the real world now.                                

                                                         ~~~

[valleyofthefae]

MAC MAC MAC ,,, answer all the number ask questions .... I dare ya 👀

i accept ur dare 👀👀😎

1. Who was the last person you held hands with?my little sister probs ? 
2. Are you outgoing or shy?Shy af !!!
3. Who are you looking forward to seeing?my nana tomorrow !
4. Are you easy to get along with?ummm,,,, i feel like im not but idk how others feel about that
5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you?hmm,, idk ? 🤔
6. What kind of people are you attracted to?ppl who look like they dont sleep very often (dane dehaan for example), ppl w/ pretty eyes, or interesting personalities tbh (idk what i mean by that, im thinking about Grimes & Billie tbh) 
7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now?heck nah 
8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind?Dane since i mentioned him up there ^
9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable?yup
10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with?You probably !! 💕
11. What does the most recent text that you sent say?“haha, okayyy 💓💓!!!” to u 👀
12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now?Bellyache by Billie Eilish, Grrrls by AViVa, Pretty Head by Transviolet, The Gunner by MGK, & party favor by billie eilish :) 
13. Do you like it when people play with your hair?mhmm!!
14. Do you believe in luck and miracles?Eh, kinda??? I believe in miracles, luck not so much
15. What good thing happened this summer?idk,, that was 5ever ago 
16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?hell no
17. Do you think there is life on other planets?yes !!!
18. Do you still talk to your first crush?nope :) i was too scared to talk to them in general tbh 
19. Do you like bubble baths?i used to !
20. Do you like your neighbors?yeah!! some of them, i live by a lotta old people & theyre really nice !!
21. What are you bad habits?ummm, biting my lips/insides of my cheeks && some other things 
22. Where would you like to travel?Canada, Europe, some places in Asia, & other states !!
23. Do you have trust issues?yeah :/
24. Favorite part of your daily routine?makin tea 
25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with?all of them
26. What do you do when you wake up?i look at what time it is 
27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker?im actually okay with my skin color now, i used to wish i had lighter skin though 
28. Who are you most comfortable around?you !!
29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up?nah
30. Do you ever want to get married?nah
31. If your hair long enough for a pony tail?yup!! :)
32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with?🙅🏽‍♀️
33. Spell your name with your chin.um,, maheczwi tried :)

34. Do you play sports? What sports?no, i played softball like 6 years ago tho (i hated it)
35. Would you rather live without TV or music?tv !
36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them?yeah!
37. What do you say during awkward silences?i dont know if i say anything ? 
38. Describe your dream girl/guy?someone who isnt a terrible person
39. What are your favorite stores to shop in?Claire’s, FYE, antique places, goodwill
40. What do you want to do after high school?i have no ideaaa
41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance?Depends on what they did
42. If your being extremely quiet what does it mean?idk, it can mean a lotta thingsbut tbh, im always quiet so who knowsss 
43. Do you smile at strangers?if they smile at me i do :)
44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean?dang man, idk !!!! is both an option 👀👀
45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning?on school days, my alarm bc i have to climb down a ladderon weekends, having to go to the bathroom does
46. What are you paranoid about?my friends secretly hating me,, and probs other stuff 
47. Have you ever been high?nope :)
48. Have you ever been drunk?nope :)
49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about?no :) 
50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore?Black 
51. Ever wished you were someone else?25/9
52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself?The way my brain is wired
53. Favourite makeup brand?Hard candy probs 
54. Favourite store?claire’s
55. Favourite blog?hmmmm, idk i follow a lot !
56. Favourite colour?pastel pink, blue, purple, gray, & white
57. Favourite food? apples
58. Last thing you ate? some chicken marsala thing 
59. First thing you ate this morning?oatmeal
60. Ever won a competition? For what?I dont think so ? 🤔
61. Been suspended/expelled? For what?nope !
62. Been arrested? For what?nope !
63. Ever been in love? nah! 
64. Tell us the story of your first kiss?it was w/ one of my childhood friends & tbh, that’s all i remember 
65. Are you hungry right now?,,
66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends?i dont have tumblr friends tbh
67. Facebook or Twitter?ummmm, i dont like either 
68. Twitter or Tumblr?tumblr
69. Are you watching tv right now?yup! im watching tom & jerry 😎
70. Names of your bestfriends? youuuu ! 
71. Craving something? What?strawberries tbh 
72. What colour are your towels?umm we got some gray ones & some purple ones !
72. How many pillows do you sleep with?one or none tbh 
73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals?mhmm!!! theyre at the end of my bed (they make there way up to where i am tho) 
74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have?👀👀👀👀👀 15-25 is a good guess,, for the ones on my bedi have a lotta stuffed animals 
75. Favourite animal?fox, bunny, soo many othersss !!!
76. What colour is your underwear?purple
77. Chocolate or Vanilla?vanilla, tbh
78. Favourite ice cream flavour?vanilla
79. What colour shirt are you wearing?a pink & black one :)
80. What colour pants?black 
81. Favourite tv show?Looney Tunes
82. Favourite movie?hmmmm,,,,, idk honestlymy fav recent movie is wonder woman 
83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2?ehh, not really a fan of either one !
84. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street?ive never seen 21 jump street soo idk 
85. Favourite character from Mean Girls?Karen (??? idk, the one played by Amanda Seyfried) 
86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo?the octopus (idk her name), & Gil
87. First person you talked to today?my sister maybe ?? i honestly have no idea
88. Last person you talked to today?my sister 
89. Name a person you hate?😉 we all know who i hate w/ a passion (hint: the name starts with a “n”) 
90. Name a person you love?Alyssa, Billie Eilish (it only calls for one, but i love billie) 
91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now?myself 
92. In a fight with someone?nah
93. How many sweatpants do you have?likeeeee 2 pairs i think 
94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have?dang idk tbh,, i have a lotta hoodies && at least 5-7 sweaters 
95. Last movie you watched?Bolt 
96. Favourite actress?ahhhh !! i have too many, soooDove Cameron, Angelina Jolie, Elle Fanning, Emily Browning, Gal Gadot, Ástrid Bergés-Frisbey, Hannah Murray, Christina Ricci, Lily-Rose Depp, etc !! 
97. Favourite actor?Dane Dehaan, Cole Sprouse, J D*pp, Freddie Highmore, etc
98. Do you tan a lot?no ?
99. Have any pets?i have a dog named layla && some fish !
100. How are you feeling?not too swell :/
101. Do you type fast?heck yeah man !
102. Do you regret anything from your past?so many things 
103. Can you spell well?i’d like to think so, im not too bad at it :)
104. Do you miss anyone from your past?mhm 
105. Ever been to a bonfire party?nope !
106. Ever broken someone’s heart?idk, honestly
107. Have you ever been on a horse?ive been on a pony, does that count? 
108. What should you be doing?nothing atm !
109. Is something irritating you right now?yeah,, but it’s all good !
110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt?no
111. Do you have trust issues?aye (this is up there somewhere too) 
112. Who was the last person you cried in front of?idk honestly
113. What was your childhood nickname?Kenz
114. Have you ever been out of your province/state?mhm!!! ive been to texas, other states going to texas, Washington DC, Mexico (i was hella young), other places bc of my sisters meets, && yeah :) 
115. Do you play the Wii?not anymore 
116. Are you listening to music right now?no, i might tho 
117. Do you like chicken noodle soup?yeah
118. Do you like Chinese food?yeh, some of it 
119. Favourite book?hmmmmmmmmmm, idk !! 
120. Are you afraid of the dark?yes 
121. Are you mean?i can be 
122. Is cheating ever okay?nope
123. Can you keep white shoes clean?ive never owned white shoes !
124. Do you believe in love at first sight?no
125. Do you believe in true love?no
126. Are you currently bored?kinda
127. What makes you happy?um,, seein my bestest buddy, talkin’ to my bestest buddy, seeing cute animals, and listening to music 
128. Would you change your name?yeah, tbh
129. What your zodiac sign?Aquarius :)
130. Do you like subway?no
131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?Idk,, i wouldnt like em back tho
132. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with?this ones up there too !
133. Favourite lyrics right now?“Call me calloused, call me coldYou’re italic, I’m in boldCall me cocky, watch your toneYou better love me, ‘cause you’re just a clone” - COPYCAT by billie 
134. Can you count to one million?gosh i hope so
135. Dumbest lie you ever told?hmm, idk ive told a lotta dumb lies 
136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed?closed !!!! always!! 
137. How tall are you?5’3”
138. Curly or Straight hair?curly/wavy
139. Brunette or Blonde?brunette 
140. Summer or Winter?winter (even tho i hate winter)
141. Night or Day?Night
142. Favourite month?october
143. Are you a vegetarian?i wish
144. Dark, milk or white chocolate?none,, tbh 
145. Tea or Coffee?tea
146. Was today a good day?nah
147. Mars or Snickers?neither
148. What’s your favourite quote?hmm, idk atm
149. Do you believe in ghosts?yes
150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page? “Selling their bog recipes and crone aphorisms and schoolboy spells! It makes me sick.”from the Wicked book

[piilokarsastus]

Get to know me

1. Who was the last person you held hands with? my gf

2. Are you outgoing or shy? not really outgoing, but shy doesn’t describe me either

3. Who are you looking forward to seeing? any cat tbh

4. Are you easy to get along with? generally, yes

5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you? probably

6. What kind of people are you attracted to? girls that are nice, that I just have this weird connection with from the moment we meet and that have a similar taste in things as me

7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now? yes

8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind? my gf

9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable? no

10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with? define ‘deep’

11. What does the most recent text that you sent say? ‘relatable’

12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now? I can never decide over these things but can we just pretend I named 5 piano pieces from Oliver Messiaen?

13. Do you like it when people play with your hair? people, plural? I prefer one at a time but yeah it’s nice

14. Do you believe in luck and miracles? sort of

15. What good thing happened this summer? I got a composing commission

16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again? I’d do it a thousand times

17. Do you think there is life on other planets? yes

18. Do you still talk to your first crush? no

19. Do you like bubble baths? yeah but the last time I had one was in like 2010 or something

20. Do you like your neighbors? yes

21. What are you bad habits? procrastinating

22. Where would you like to travel? many places, especially Germany

23. Do you have trust issues? no

24. Favorite part of your daily routine? when I get home from school, I make sandwiches and eat them in bed, watching HBO

25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with? all of it

26. What do you do when you wake up? frankly speaking, I don’t

27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker? wtf is this question

28. Who are you most comfortable around? my parents and my gf

29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up? no

30. Do you ever want to get married? it could be nice, but I really don’t care about that yet

31. If your hair long enough for a pony tail? lol nope

32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with? ???wut

33. Spell your name with your chin. nmkjkjllkb kjfrdshjulksadnbihj

34. Do you play sports? What sports? sports? I don’t know her

35. Would you rather live without TV or music? TV??? like what kind of uncivilised barbarian would choose to live without music??

36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them? when I was a kid

37. What do you say during awkward silences? I don’t?? no one says anything, that’s why it’s called awkward silence

38. Describe your dream girl/guy? she would be... sweet, funny, hella cute, amazing hair, likes music, probably plays the clarinet... oh wait

39. What are your favorite stores to shop in? any book/music store and stores where you can buy fancy chocolate and other stuff to eat

40. What do you want to do after high school? not math

41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance? depends on the fucking context 42. If your being extremely quiet what does it mean? it could mean a variety of things. I could be having a perfectly normal day with just no one to talk to at the moment, or I could be having the worst day ever. 43. Do you smile at strangers? uhh...no (why would anyone do that?) 44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean? space 45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning? school. or hunger. in both cases, I do so reclutantly 46. What are you paranoid about? people abandoning me 47. Have you ever been high? yes, there was this mountain range on Gran Canaria, it was, like, 2km high or something 48. Have you ever been drunk? no 49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about? my browser history is clean 50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore? dark blue 51. Ever wished you were someone else? not permanently, but it’d be interesting to experience the world with someone else’s eyes 52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself? my body 53. Favourite makeup brand? the fuck do I care? oh, maybe all these questions are meant for women (or others) that use makeup... maybe I shoud use makeup... maybe I’m a woman... maybe... it’s MAYBELLINE 54. Favourite store? Stockmann 55. Favourite blog? no opinion on this one 56. Favourite colour? blue but honestly I love every colour (except for that one... yeah, that) 57. Favourite food? pizza 58. Last thing you ate? bread 59. First thing you ate this morning? bread 60. Ever won a competition? For what? I won a costume competition at school in the 2nd grade, I was Harry Potter 61. Been suspended/expelled? For what? no 62. Been arrested? For what? no 63. Ever been in love? oh boi yes 64. Tell us the story of your first kiss? my first gf was over, we lay on the couch and had a LotR marathon. We then discussed a more serious thing, and after that the kiss just happened 65. Are you hungry right now? no 66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends? let’s be real my only tumblr friends are also my irl friends 67. Facebook or Twitter? Facebook 68. Twitter or Tumblr? Tumblr 69. Are you watching tv right now? no 70. Names of your bestfriends? no not gonna tell u u scary internet person 71. Craving something? What? that mineral 72. What colour are your towels? we’re only 72 questions in and this is what you come up with? 72. How many pillows do you sleep with? 1-2 73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals? occasionally, there’s a doggo 74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have? like 40 75. Favourite animal? cat 76. What colour is your underwear? I wonder the same thing every day 77. Chocolate or Vanilla? (I’ll assume this is about ice cream) vanilla 78. Favourite ice cream flavour? yes 79. What colour shirt are you wearing? red 80. What colour pants? black 81. Favourite tv show? yes 82. Favourite movie? I rarely watch films these days, but I really liked the King’s Speech 83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2? only seen the latter 84. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street? I should watch the first Mean Girls before I can make up my mind, but for now I’ll say 21 Jump Street 85. Favourite character from Mean Girls? can we just stop with the Mean Girls questions already? 86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo? that was unexpected but thanks 87. First person you talked to today? my mum 88. Last person you talked to today? my mum 89. Name a person you hate? trump 90. Name a person you love? my gf 91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now? yes 92. In a fight with someone? no 93. How many sweatpants do you have? 2 94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have? 4 95. Last movie you watched? Einstein and Eddington 96. Favourite actress? I don’t really have favourites but Emma Thompson is a legend 97. Favourite actor? the same thing as above but David Tennant 98. Do you tan a lot? somewhat significantly, but I don’t really like sunbathing so I don’t know exactly how much 99. Have any pets? no :( 100. How are you feeling? normal 101. Do you type fast? quite so 102. Do you regret anything from your past? yes 103. Can you spell well? yes 104. Do you miss anyone from your past? friends that no longer stay in touch for reasons they apparently don’t deem appropriate to enlighten me about 105. Ever been to a bonfire party? this is Finland... find me someone who hasn’t been to one 106. Ever broken someone’s heart? nopefully hot hopefully not 107. Have you ever been on a horse? no 108. What should you be doing? shut the fuck up I’m not listening 109. Is something irritating you right now? no 110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt? yes 111. Do you have trust issues? didn’t we already do this one? 112. Who was the last person you cried in front of? I actually don’t remember but mum probably 113. What was your childhood nickname? in my case, you can’t talk about “the” nickname, there has been so many... 114. Have you ever been out of your province/state? oh no sir where I live is the centre of the world, I don’t need to leave because why would anyone want to experience anything new ever, oh boy you won’t even believe what the Pohjois-Pohjanmaan lakeudet perkele has to offer (tl;dr: yes)

115. Do you play the Wii? the whom?

116. Are you listening to music right now? no

117. Do you like chicken noodle soup? yeah whatever

118. Do you like Chinese food? yes

119. Favourite book? no no no don’t ask me questions like this 

120. Are you afraid of the dark? no

121. Are you mean? no if you aren’t an arse

122. Is cheating ever okay? no. fuk u. u ruined the board game.

123. Can you keep white shoes clean? that should be pretty easy, all you need is a sterile bag and a safe

124. Do you believe in love at first sight? no

125. Do you believe in true love? what do mean by ‘true’?

126. Are you currently bored? no

127. What makes you happy? food

128. Would you change your name? no, I would’ve already done that by now, wouldn’t I?

129. What your zodiac sign? Virgo

130. Do you like subway? (insert a joke about public transport)

131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do? date her, if you’re literally best friends with someone of your preferred sex, as in ‘I feel really safe and comfortable around this person and I care about them’ then what the fuck is there that prevents you from having the best romantic relationship possible?

132. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with? WE HAD THIS QUESTION ALREADY WHY DO THESE EVEN HAVE NUMBERS IF YOU’RE GONNA ASK ME THE SAME THINGS TWICE LIES EVERYWHERE

133. Favourite lyrics right now? i listen to the music, not the lyrics

134. Can you count to one million? yes. but I wont.

135. Dumbest lie you ever told? When I was like 3 I messed with my dad’s watch and didn’t know how to change the time back to normal and when my dad asked me what had happened to the watch I said that it had been on the floor and I had accidentally stepped on a random wrench that had just happened to lie there next to it and the wrench had then launched into the air and landed on the watch breaking it

136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed? closed

137. How tall are you? 170cm

138. Curly or Straight hair? my hair? straight

139. Brunette or Blonde? my hair? brunette

140. Summer or Winter? Summer

141. Night or Day? Night

142. Favourite month? July

143. Are you a vegetarian? no

144. Dark, milk or white chocolate? dark. milk chocolate is also good if it’s of high quality

145. Tea or Coffee? Tea

146. Was today a good day? has been so far

147. Mars or Snickers? why not both

148. What’s your favourite quote? ‘It amplifies your natural abilities, like a microphone... or a pooper scooper’ -The 11th Doctor

149. Do you believe in ghosts? no

150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page? “Ei hassumpaa”