#10/10 very funny caption to me

[faunandfloraas]

I can't tell the difference between skiz and skzoo by Sydney Short Form Manager🐶

[amaranthineghost]

—23 GOING ON 33 oscar posts a couple of tiktoks which leads to the entirety of internet making fun of him for his millennial behavior

oscarpiastri has posted a tiktok!

[caption: come on then, give us your best #askoscar]

user what's your favorite type of bread

user hey oscar, why do you have a millennial pause even though you're technically gen z

user when is the carlos diss track?

ynusername why do you have a millennial pause, i thought you were better than this 😓

user how is your relationship with drs going??

user oscar do you perhaps know what a millennial pause is

user would you ever consider becoming a full time tiktok influencer

user do you think alex is pookie

logansargeant mate im older than you and i don't even have a millenial pause

⤷ logansargeant but when's the diss track

user how do you maintain the swirl in your hair?

user he's so millennial with that pause

user im not even surprised

user someone please teach him

oscarpiastri has posted a tiktok!

[caption: reply to @/randomuserdontask]

ynusername oscar sweetie i thought we talked about this

⤷ logansargeant the training we taught him got him no where! he's still acting like he was born 10 years before he actually was!

⤷ ynusername a true tragedy we must save him

user yn and logan plotting against oscar in the comments 😭

⤷ user he needs to be stopped

user the millennial pause is killing me

user he keeps avoiding the carlos diss track questions

⤷ user well ofc! he's got to keep it a secret for when it comes out

⤷ user TRUE

user i bet oscar is collaborating with lewis considering he took his seat at ferrari

user oscar, please take some advice the millennial pause is funny BUT PLEASE

user someone save him

⤷ ynusername 🤫🤫🤫

⤷ user GIRL PLEASE WORK YOUR MAGIC

⤷ ynusername IM TRYING HE DOESN"T LISTEN VERY WELL (this is the same man that was a car furry for the first few years of his life so)

oscarpiastri

liked by ynusername and 406,703 others

oscarpiastri photo dump

view all 1,092 comments

ynusername oh dear

⤷ ynusername okay but wait this is actually hilarious, i think i might stop breathing

⤷ oscarpiastri please breath

user when oscar posts a photo dump that's literally just the same pictures repeating in no specific order

logansargeant a tragedy that not even william shakespeare could write

⤷ user DIABOLICAL

user oscar buddy we have devolved instead of evolving from the millennial pause

⤷ user the teachings ain't working

⤷ ynusername IM TRYING MY BEST

⤷ ynusername but also millennial oscar is pretty funny

⤷ user we dont blame you yn! 🙌🏼

ynusername

liked by oscarpiastri and 10,498 others

ynusername this is how you post a photo dump

view all 57 comments

user yes please teach him how its done

oscarpiastri maybe its all part of my master plan

⤷ ynusername oscar lets be fr, you can't come up with any master plans

⤷ oscarpiastri you never know

⤷ ynusername i mean i never knew you were capable of a millennial pause

⤷ oscarpiastri ouch

oscarpiastri

liked by ynusername and 724,294 others

oscarpiastri thanks for the help pretty ☀️

comments have been disabled

[no-144444]

hello hello hellooo

you’re one of the very few people here that i see that writes for jack, and i have an idea ☝️🤓

you know that one trend that like “a boy who’s jacked and kind” (slim pickins by sabrina) i think reader would convince jack to do it, and it would be even funnier bc his name is jack 😭

idk i just thought it was a cute idea 😭🫶

sabrina said it best- j.doohan

summary: he's a guy who's jacked and kind, what can you say ?

pairing: jack doohan x fem! rb driver! reader

୨ৎ⋅୨ৎ⋅୨ৎ⋅୨ৎ⋅୨ৎ⋅୨ৎ⋅୨ৎ

Was it your plan to be carried out of a bar by your boyfriend because you were drunk out of your mind?

No, not really. 

But it was quite funny. Jack was the kind of boyfriend who literally would do anything you asked him to. He was the best mix of a golden retriever and black cat. Just introverted enough to let your extroversion shine through, but extroverted enough that he wasn’t socially awkward. He also had no shame in carrying you out of a bar after your first win in F1 (F1 power couple, if you ask me) with the biggest, smuggest smirk on his face. 

The bad thing about Monté-Carlo? How small it was. 

Fans had found out where you were celebrating, and they’d waited outside to catch a glimpse of the new RedBull darling, the highest scoring woman of all time in the sport. They were not expecting to see Jack carrying you out as you pressed soft kisses to his neck, giggled, or just smiled, making Jack stop so you could chat with passing fans. 

One such fan videoed him picking you back up after one such chat, and put it to the Sabrina Carpenter song ‘Slim Pickin’s’, to match the trend that was going around. 

It didn’t take long to garner over 10 million views. People who didn’t even know F1 were obsessed with it, and F1 enjoyers were even more obsessed. 

It didn’t take long for you to go to Jack, asking him to do the trend. 

And he was all too happy to oblige. You stood in front of the camera, a smile on your face as you lip-synced to the lyrics, Jack standing behind you with that same smug smirk, picking you up easily and sitting you on his shoulder, flexing his right arm to the camera. 

Your caption was the icing on the cake. 

A boy who’s jacked and kind? See what I did there! 

Yes, both Alpine and RedBull begged you to take it down, but it had 20 million likes. 

Fuck them.

୨ৎ⋅୨ৎ⋅୨ৎ⋅୨ৎ⋅୨ৎ⋅୨ৎ⋅୨ৎ

navigation for my blog :) (masterlist)

[absolutebl]

Best 24 of BL 2024 - Quirky Awards

ONLY shows that ENDED their runs in 2024 are up for awards.

SHOCK & AWE AWARDS

1. Biggest BL surprise of 2024:

Cherry Magic Thailand. TayNew's version was truly a lovely experience and very much its own take on the original, an adaptation rather than a remake. I'm so relieved and grateful that GMMTV managed to pull it off, and sad it wasn't more widely available.

2. The “that country did WHAT?” award:

Meet You At the Blossom from China. From start to finish it is exactly as it claimed to be, wuxia BL, including more than the expected amount of sexual claiming (dubious consent to the point of rape) and actual kisses, wife language, floaty sleeves, you name it. FROM CHINA!!!

3. Biggest casting whoa! where did you come from? award:

Up & Poom in My Stand-In. I mean, WHERE did you two come from and how did this happen? Holy smokes. My goodness are we grateful!

4. That studio did WHAT now? award:

Youku putting Unknown out wide and easily avaiable on YouTube (for most of us). It's just really rare for a Taiwanese BL to get any kind of distribution. And to do that with arguably the best TaBL of the year and not some sad little mew mew? Amazing.

5. I’m sad you were ignored award:

Sugar Dog Life - such a charming JBL, so hard to find. I'm so sad it didn't get distribution. It's charming, one of my favorites of the year, worth tracking down if you can.

6. 2024 BL That Actually Made Me Lose My Mind Award?

I gotta be honest, it was The Sign. I was such a chaotic mess of a show but never once was I bored. It was the only one that drove me into memes and captions and silliness.

I did go a bit feral for a while over Love for Loves Sake and Wandee Gooday not to mention The Only One (until it went tits-up).

NARRATIVE AWARDS

7. Best story 2024:

Cherry Magic (Thai remake). I know, but it worked just as well in another country, if not better. I always enjoy this kind of magical realism concept (after all Color Rush is one of my all time favorite BLs) and despite the increased length, the pacing was solid on this one... even from Thailand.

8. Best narrative structure 2024 award:

Love For Love's Sake. A KBL isekai about a man who must win a game by convincing a reserved teen outcast to fall in love with him. Of course, that teen represents himself and his own unhappiness. I drowned in this show and liked it that way.

9. Best 2024 dialogue (script) award:

We Are, it was just so much fun. And so FUNNY.

10. Favorite scene 2024:

Like anyone needed to ask. Unknown, of course.

11. The most rewatchable BL of 2024 award:

We Are

It's just all the couples are so cute and the core friendship group is so charming and endearing.

ACTORS & CHARACTERS AWARDS

12. Best performance of a queer actor in a leading role:

no award this year, yeah the whole damn industry should be thoroughly ashamed of itself

13. Best pining 2024:

The Time of Fever. That feeding him orange while lying on the floor scene ALONE.

14. Best wingman 2024 (The Namgoong Award)

Yai in The Sign.

15. Biggest OMG I LOVE you boys together, YAY!

SailubPon from Pit Babe & This Love Doesn't Have Longbeans, from the softness of one to the health code violations of the other. Sure their shows are bonkers, but man are these two good at bonkers (and bonking).

With a nod to BigPark from Monster Next Door.

16. Most unexpected return of a BL pair? award:

OffGun. There were rumors that Off was out at the beginning of 2023. And then they came back with 2 shows in 2024 (Cooking Crush and The Trainee)!

17. Well aren't you two just the prettiest? award:

I dithered a lot (Babe's damn waist and OMG The Sign's sex scenes hawt), but in the end it had to go to GreatInn. They were just so good at showing their characters having FUN together. There is a lot of beauty in enjoying sex and another person's company. It's so rare to see that portrayed in a BL (and it shouldn't be rare).

18. LIFETIME ACHIEVEMENT AWARD

I'm actually giving it to OffGun. Ya know, where others falter, these two just keep going. It's kinda amazing.

RANDOM PICKS

19. Favorite Linguistic Moment of 2024:

The general flirtatious banter from Last Twilight.

20. Biggest disappointment of 2024:

Addicted Heroin (Thai version). Some of the very best original material + one of my favorite Thai actors (who I've been waiting eons to see in a BL again) and THIS was the result? They could have fixed China's worst BL mistake, instead the made everything worse. I'm gonna be bitter for a really really long time.

I gotta sat The Only One comes a real close second tho. And I'm still mad about Last Twilight, too.

21. Best Wardrobe/Prop Use 2023

Meet You At The Blossom - I love a pretty boy pissing contest over who has the biggest sleeves. Twirl you beautiful bastards, TWIRL!

22. Best Queer Rep 2024

Again, not great this year. I loved the fun sex and play in Wandee, but there were precious few femme characters, and in general it felt like we took some steps back from queerness this year. So I'm gonna give it to Deep Night, because at least they gave us honest poly for the first time.

23. Best Meta Trope call out

Love for Love Sake - Korea taking to task the Dead Fish Kiss when they are often the worst offender was...... amusing.

But Deep Night having male sex workers having to act like they were in a BL for a couple chicks...... literally gay for pay depicting gay for pay and just, well, that's frankly a gut punch. There was some sarcastic clapping on my side of the screen.

24. Well aren't you getting all Live Action Yaoi retro with your bad self?

Dominant Yakuza and Wimpy Corporate Slave gets my vintage af award. I flipping LOVED it. Would I recommend it? Only if you, yourself, are a bit vintage.

Final question: which of the 24 was the hardest for me to pick?

20 Biggest disappointment of 2024. Look I had some pretty high expectations of some returning pairs, some great ideas, and some intriguing remakes. 2024 was full of disappointments.

2022's Version of the Quirkies

2023's Version of the Quirkies

Remember I only pull from shows that were completely finished by the end of 2024.

(source)

[flo-zoinks]

I love making these it's kind of a problem now

WHAT EACH RDR2 GANG MEMBER WOULD POST ON SOCIAL MEDIA (my opinion)

Dutch - 10 minute tiktok rants about why the USA is failing (normally stitched from a news clip) - with a small cult like following with about 150 likes

Hosea - Outdoor skills teaching videos (hunting and whatnot) with all the comments saying hes like a Father figure

Arthur - Pretty photos of Forest animals on Insta without a caption

Bill - stitching people on tiktok challenging them to fist fights and those "what happened to real men" tiktoks

Javier - Music covers on guitar (very popular)

John - (1899) shitty gaming clips with NO schedule like sometimes 9 months apart

Abigail - get ready with me ranting about her child and husband

Jack - (1907-11) posting videos of his family being stupid without them knowing (80% Uncle and John)

Mary-Beth - Novel bios and links to her online Wattpad

Tilly - cute trends on tt often with her friends (like dances or cool transitions)

Karen - funny ass one-liner captions making fun of things

Miss Grimshaw - Those "Mother how do i" videos in her spare time

Reverend - Bible passages with a 9 minute rant after and then every week an accidental upload whilst shit-faced

Molly - shopping hauls that turn into vents

Strauss - Links to his business (regularly asks the younger members how to use functions and what things mean)

Trelawny - Magic tricks and Dramatic storytelling (everytime in a random place people find funny)

Sean - 20 second rant that's unironically hilarious and gets made into a template

Lenny - Book readings and 5 minute stitches respectfully arguing against the people he doesn't agree with

Charles - Never uploads aside from once a photo of Arthur next to an animal in a really pretty outdoor scenery

Sadie - secret videos of people like Pearson doing something embarrassing (inspired Jack to do the same) and "pranks"

Uncle - going out in public and doing something outrageous that ends in him being arrested (was nudity 9 times)

Micah - thirstraps

Pearson - videos on his wild "adventures" whilst cooking in the backround (the comments bully his food and his adventures)

Kieran - Horse Care videos (fully anonymous and would blur his face on everything). Lots and lots of horse videos

Yall remind me who I forgot

[yukinss]

people’s princess | yt22

pairing: yuki tsunoda x fem!horner! reader summary: in which yuki is dating the christian horner’s daughter. note: i mentioned something awhile back about a horner!reader fic … so i kinda delivered. it’s kinda short since i learned that on mobile i only get a 10 image limit 🌝 trust i will be doing the rest of my smaus on web, so future smaus will be longer! promise, cross my heart!  note 2: i started this before alphatauri changed their name … and i’m most definitely not using the visacashapprb @ in my smau. i love you, yuki, but absolutely not.

ynhorner

liked by yukitsunoda0511, christianhorner, and others

ynhorner yukiroos !!

view all comments

user i didn’t know yuki and oscar were chill like that

yukitsunoda0511 i was attacked. it’s not funny to post my attack

⤷ ynhorner jerry didn’t attack you, he just wanted a hug

⤷ yukitsunoda0511 he literally attacked me

maxverstappen1 barf what is that second picture

⤷ ynhorner barf what is your face

⤷ maxverstappen1 i’m telling christian

⤷ ynhorner you’re dead to me

user i love yn and max’s friendship

gerihalliwellhorner missing you both!! ❤️

liked by ynhorner and yukitsunoda0511

redbullracing looking forward to seeing you in the OUR garage again

⤷ alphataurif1 um you mean OUR garage

⤷ ynhorner the girls a fighting 🫢

pierregasly barf gross nasty

⤷ ynhorner this is why i like kika more than you

⤷ francisa.cgomes i love you too 🫶🫶🫶

yukitsunoda0511

liked by ynhorner, pierregasly, and others

yukitsunoda0511 family dinner 🍽️

view all comments

gerihalliwellhorner it was lovely having you, yuki!! we have to do this again soon!

⤷ yukitsunoda0511 thank you for having me, geri! checking my schedule as we speak!

user yuki tsunoda and ginger spice, the duo i didn’t know i need

pierregasly my place next 😁

ynhorner idk whose dog is in the third pic … she was very sweet though

⤷ yukitsunoda0511 i heard something about petsitting for a friend

user OTIS

christianhorner not very family friendly pg clean on the third slide

⤷ ynhorner don’t you have ears to clean, old man?

⤷ christianhorner you’re no longer welcomed in the red bull

garage

⤷ alphataurif1 WE WON ‼️‼️

maxverstappen1 i don’t remember getting an invite to family dinner 🌝

user the fact that max didn’t get invited is crazy to me

redbullracing stealing our team principal i see …

user THE EAR WAX COMMENT FROM YN IJBOL

user yuki with his in laws, we love to see it

alphataurif1

liked by yukitsuonda0511, ynhorner, and others

alphataurif1 thx for banning yn from your garage redbullracing, she’s ours now 🥰

view all comments

ynusername i love you alphataurif1 admin <33

⤷ alphataurif1 I LOVE YOU TOO YN !!!! <3333

yukitsunoda0511 i could get used to this

user THE CAPTION

maxverstappen1 please keep her, i don’t want her in the garage anymore

⤷ ynhorner this is why you weren’t invited to family dinner

redbullracing WE didn’t ban her, boss man did (we will be getting her back)

user i love seeing alphatauri and red bull fight over yn, because i would too

user yn is the face of alphatauri (trust)

ynhorner

liked by yukitsuonda0511, maxverstappen1, and others

ynhorner BOYFI APPRECIATED POST !!

view all comments

yukitsunoda0511 i love you to the moon and saturn

⤷ ynhorner yuki :( i love YOU to the moon and saturn!

user MOTHER AND FATHER

liamlawson30 he’s got a little something on his face

⤷ yukitsunoda0511 blocked. reported.

user the boyfriend effect looks good on him

danielricciardo my fav couple 🫶

liked by ynhorner and yukitsunoda0511

user they make me sick (in the most loving way possible)

maxverstappen1 you guys are cute i guess

⤷ ynhorner i know! tell kelly i’m looking forward to seeing her in the paddock this weekend 😁

⤷ maxverstappen1 👍

user yuki is so lucky …

nyckdevries scooter race rematch when?

⤷ yukitsunoda0511 rematch?? there was a scooter race??

⤷ ynhorner you were busy with car stuff, so nyck and i

decided to race scooters on the trace 😁

user WHEN IS IT MY TURN

user idc what anyone says, i love nyck and yn’s little friendship

⤷ user no fr it feels like it came out of nowhere, but it works

[stars-and-the-min]

☆ the wrong way to hard launch (15) | OP81

summary : oscar's girlfriend is a walking pr problem for literally everyone (including herself) social media au

pairing : oscar piastri x zhou!fem!singer!oc

a/n tantalisingly close yet still a bit too far (first oscar podium of the season!!!) also btw this is gonna be my last post for a little bit, i'm in my exam season, i just wanted to let you guys know!

masterlist | last part | part 15 | next part

YOUTUBE

comments

omg proof of life

3:28 the subtle comedy of her being so close to the f1 world while being scared of going fast 😭

we need more interviews of her! she's an absolute delight to listen to

don't be shy, release the uncut version

choosing your bf over your literal blood-related cousin is lowkey wild ↳ i mean if you think about it like this: would you rather be driven at high speeds by your cousin who would mess with you or your boyfriend who worships the ground you walk on?

MESSAGES

from the phone of oscar piastri

INSTAGRAM

selinabui 🎵 Florence + The Machine · Cosmic Love | Florence, Italy

liked by oscarpiastri and 492,384 others

selinabui i took the stars from my eyes and then i made a map tagged: cameliazzz

oliviarodrigo obsessed with you 💜 ↳ selinabui @.oliviarodrigo liv, baby, we did not plan these tours well, were we aiming for missing each other by two days?

28kaslina24 the florence and the machine lyric caption >>>> WELCOME BACK QUEEN!!!

oscarpiastri Who'd you have dinner with looking that pretty? ↳ selinabui @.oscarpiastri just this f1 driver, i think he drives for mclaren ↳ landonorris @.selinabui yeah i had a blast at dinner 👍

tina_kim not 100% sold that this is actually her posting... why are they playing mind games with us ↳ pastry81 @tina_kim oscar commented so i remain cautiously optimistic

MESSAGES

from the phone of selina bui

TWITTER

piaa⁸¹ @ papayaeightyone · 2h oscar piastri trending on twitter for two reasons: getting adopted by charles leclerc and that video of him very unsubtly checking out his girlfriend ↳ piaa⁸¹ @ papayaeightyone · 2h i felt like i was intruding but also he was very very attractive in a way that is concerning

jackpot ☆ @slayridgo · 3h lina's reply to olivia's comment made me realise that taylor, olivia and empty bottles are just... bouncing around europe at the same time and that thought was so funny i just had to share it ↳ jackpot ☆ @slayridgo · 3h i have all three tour calendars open and they're narrowly missing each other by like a couple days- selivia are both in the same venue in paris in the SAME WEEK but EB is performing june 10-12 and olivia is june 14-15 but by june 15, EB are in amsterdam all while taylor is in the UK and after taylor's UK leg finishes, she's going to amsterdam which is the same time EB's UK round begins and while olivia's on break ↳ kayla @luna_apocolypse · 49m the music girlies are having a blast

june @linafesting · 2h wait not me just realising that EB's break almost perfectly coincides with the F1 summer break... ↳ june @linafesting · 2h where's that reddit theory that EB planned the tour around the F1 calendar, how long does it take to plan a tour???

INSTAGRAM

oscarpiastri Circuit de Monaco

liked by charles_leclerc and 277,486 others

oscarpiastri Feeling the Monégasque love this weekend 💛 tagged: mclaren, charles_leclerc, sennabrazil and institutoayrtonsenna

ninisf1diary Oscar Piastri-Leclerc 😭😭😭

piastri_lina pls don't fall victim to the monaco curse pls pls pls

TWITTER

opal @pxastrixxx · 7h SHE isn't even attending the monaco gp like figures... ↳ 🕯️manifesting EB3 🕯️@.linabelles · 4h fyi she can't go bc she's performing two sold-out shows milan on race weekend, you would know this if you used your brain

Kas 🎸 @EB_KAS · 3h got put in time out bc i laughed at lina when she walked into a doorframe, someone avenge me ↳ Lando Norris @.LandoNorris · 2h Did she happen to be on the phone with my teammate? ↳ Kas 🎸 @EB_KAS · 14m embarrassingly, yes

president linami @.linaminami · 7m i'm like crying wdym lina was so distracted on the phone with oscar she WALKED INTO A DOORFRAME ↳ president linami @.linaminami · 6m GIRLIE THIS IS SLIGHTLY PATHETIC GET OFF THE GROUND 😭

kayla @luna_apocolypse · 1h somewhere in milan selina bui is screaming bc jenson button is commentating the monaco grand prix ↳ pookie piastri @op81ln4 · 1h context??? ↳ kayla @luna_apocolypse · 47m omg sorry i forget that a lot more f1 fans follow me now 😭 lina had a massive childhood crush on jenson button, there's a photo of her like two inches from the tv staring at him

jess @OPIXSTRI · 21m why do lina and i have the same taste in men :) surely there has to be a jenson button to oscar piastri pipeline out there

INSTAGRAM

selinabui

liked by lukaszhang and 332,185 others

selinabui but it's the monaco grand prix! i never miss the grand prix!

emptybottlesbar All tuned in right before Milan Night 1 🙈

oscarpiastri How's your head? ↳ selinabui @.oscarpiastri i think u know from experience :) ↳ cameliazzz @.selinabui there are CHILDREN on this app

moonbeamlina got catfished by the selfie bc why was the rest just f1

TWITTER

TMD Tour News @EB-TMDTour · 2h A fan close to the stage interrupts the welcome speech to tell the band about the results of Formula 1 qualifying. I realise how crazy this sounds as I'm typing it up, but I'm being dead serious; congrats to Oscar for a P2 position! #TMDWorldTour ↳ lukas 🔛🔝 @lukiepookie28 · 2h i'm dying they just paused the show for the results, we're only one song into the show, lina's barely gotten thru introductions and then you just hear: "OSCAR P2!" like DAMN way to get her attention

EB Updates @emptybottles_news · 2h Fan: Oscar qualified P2! Lina: Huh? I heard Oscar, what's happening? Oh my god, is qualifying over, how'd it end up? Fan: Piastri P2! Leclerc on pole! Zhou P20! Lina: Oscar P2? *pause* There isn't anything being investigated is there? ↳ piaa⁸¹ @ papayaeightyone · 2h "there isn't anything being investigated is there" LMAO SHE'S TRAUMATISED FROM IMOLA 😭😭😭 ↳ kay ♡ @ blackcatluna · 1h zhou p20 hurt a little actually, she was so unfazed ↳ jules 🌿 @juliiaapxp · 53m i mean she clearly watched the practice sessions, she knows that the saubers have been dreadful this weekend, she probably expected that result

lina bui x2 grammy winner @urdaisea · 12m why was she so darn hot tonight... is this that famed oscar piastri effect?

president linami @ linaminami · 1h i need her biblically ngl why did that smirk make me blush so hard tonight, i've watched basically every show on these grainy ass live streams but tonight's one got me kicking my legs in the middle of the night

EB Bar @theemptybottlesbar · 23m hey... hey... how y'all doing? ↳ oscalina real ?! @emptyginbottles · 18m i've been tense since fp3 and now i'm being seduced by selina bui so i'm probably not doing very well mentally ↳ kay ♡ @ blackcatluna · 1h with all the love in my heart, tell them to stop being so hot

piaa⁸¹ @.papayaeightyone · 21m oscar is gonna open up this app with hundreds of thousands of EB fans down so bad for his girlfriend and he's gonna get it

INSTAGRAM

lukaszhang Milan, Italy

liked by liam_zhang and 300,496 others

lukaszhang post-show shenanigans tagged: eb_jonno, aidan_ebass, selinabui and cameliazzz

aidan_ebass some of us, i don't wanna name names, are becoming alcohol-dependent ↳ selinabui @aidan_ebass i'm not playing with u, it's jonny ↳ eb_jonno @.selinabui i can't be offended by something that i wholeheartedly agree with

cameliazzz for the record, i don't recall any of this

emptybottlesbar you can be drunk but never camilina ijbol drunk ↳ selinabui @emptybottlesbar you were born in the year 1993, this is embarrassing for everyone ↳ linasgirl4 @.selinabui SHE'S BACK TERRORISING HER MANAGEMENT ACCOUNTS I'VE NEVER BEEN HAPPIER

TWITTER

pookie piastri @op81ln4 · 2h thoughts and prayers to lina bui bc she decided to have a concert in the middle of the monaco gp where her boyfriend starts from the front row ↳ emme @flowersforcami · 1h technically... the show starts at 5pm and the grand prix should end by like 4:45pm... she could very much so watch it ↳ camilina gfs fr @ drummergf · 1h unfortunately i think they run a soundcheck plus hair and makeup in the lead-up to the show, that's also the reason why she couldn't watch quali! it all takes a bit and cami has said that they eat lunch then start preparing for the show then have a quick dinner then often grab supper after the show ends

Formula 1 @.F1 · 5m 🔴 RED FLAG 🔴 Sainz runs off in Casino Square and there are three cars behind which have made contact #F1 #MonacoGP ↳ emme @flowersforcami · 2m lmao yeah no lina aint watching shit...

MESSAGES

from the phone of selina bui

TWITTER

TMD Tour News @EB-TMDTour · 1h Lina addresses Oscar Piastri's podium finish at the Monaco Grand Prix! "Guys, I know, you don't have to yell it up to me today, he texted me backstage during intermission." #TMDWorldTour ↳ lukas 🔛🔝 @lukiepookie28 · 1h LMAO I WAS LITERALLY WONDERING WHY INTERMISSION FELT SO LONG TONIGHT

opal @pxastrixxx · 1h oscar got his first podium of the season and does she even care? ↳ opal @pxastrixxx · 1h the whole race when it was cutting to the ferrari wags and absolutely nothing from the papaya garage... the silence was loud ngl ↳ piaa⁸¹ @papayaeightyone · 28m can you stop bringing her up if you clearly don't like her? she's in the middle of a world tour, she physically couldn't attend bc she's performing to 17000 people in milan, and fyi, she did care, she congratulated him in private, not everything about their relationship is a spectacle, get a fucking life :)

liv is SEEING EB LIVE!! @olivielina · 17m her comedic timing 😭 she's baiting us all, i swear... she started the encore with the most melodramatic sigh and the sweetest voice with the acoustic guitar, and then she pulled the rug out from under us all ↳ liv is SEEING EB LIVE!! @olivielina · 15m she said: oscar, if you're still watching... *a couple seconds of guitar strumming with an angelic smile, you think she's about to give the most lovely speech of how proud she is of him* stop 🥰 NOW IF I WERE OSCAR PIASTRI--

↳ kayla @luna_apocolypse · 2m he's so goofy sometimes it's so endearing like no wonder she's so down bad

emptybottles_official Italy

liked by emptybottlesbar and 310,182 others

emptybottles_official Florence and Milan, you guys were absolute DREAMS! This past week in Italy has been nothing short of magical, and we hope we lived up to the love you've shown us since our debut. These shows have been a long time coming for you guys! 🔜 Zürich, Switzerland 🇨🇭

emptybottlesbar ABSOLUTELY PHENOMENAL NIGHTS!!!

marie_h.sb the milan shows were a new kinda crazy

tina_kim italy has always loved them so much, my heart🥺

✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ:

taglist @ririyulife @ashy-kit @fionaschicken @namgification @cherry-piee @urfavsgf @eiaaasamantha @sp1rl @destinyg237 @iloveyou3000morgan

[the-snake-and-dove]

you cannot convince me that thorfinn is a heterosexual character. hear me out.

1. historically speaking, vikings are famous for going at each other exactly like the greeks and romans did (pagan warriors loved that kinda thing and it was very much considered normal based on their mythology) it wouldn’t at all be unreasonable for him to be bisexual, when it comes to historical accuracy.

2. pete’s quote in halloween 2. he tells isaac there’s plenty of other fish in the sea, then follows up with “well not really, but there’s that one guy (jenkins) and idk what thor means when he mentions boat rules-“ which just refers right back to my first argument.

3. he backed up sasappis’ “i did it 43 times” claim, saying he “watched him many times as ghost.” both of their mannerisms after the fact imply that thorfinn was very much telling the truth in some capacity.

4. his two reactions to the dinosaur stripper. you cannot tell me those came from a 100% heterosexual man. (even if one was technically in isaac’s dream, but isaac has known him for awhile so)

5. jenkins telling nigel that isaac and thorfinn were together and nigel totally believing it and not at all thinking it was impossible or even close to a lie.

6. when he and flower were trying to find a third. he seemed more irritated about the situation overall, and didn’t seem phased about considering the other male ghosts as options. he didn’t seem all that opposed to pete “winning” either.

7. his reaction to the lumberjack tik tok. i’m not at all convinced he was that intrigued just from seeing wood being chopped.

8. when isaac and nigel have a brief fallout from nigel “liasioning” with jenkins that one christmas, thorfinn suggests isaac would get along with george the puritan (from the farnsbys) because they’re both gay. sasappis tells him his assumption that two guys would “get along” just because they’re both gay is wrong. when it pans back to thorfinn, he looks genuinely confused. to him, a viking, that’s a totally normal assumption to make, because that was closer to what his customs would’ve been.

9. not really a reason, i just think it’s funny. he once told pete he had “very shapely calves.”

(edit) 10. the official ghosts account reposting the clip mentioned in 2. captioning it: “the b in lgbt stands for boat.” as well as “to isaac, nigel, and anyone who observes ‘boat rules’ we hope you had a happy #pridemonth.”

[blicketdabest33]

Y'all remember that MCYT PJO au I asked for help with awhile ago? WELL HERE'S THE CABINS AND MY EXPLINATIONS BEHIND THEM!!

#1 Zeus Cabin: Jimmy, Joel Jimmy: He's a Zeus kid, but everyone somehow forgets about it. Joel: He's competitive and strong. Also, because Jimmy is his half brother through godly parent, i get to make a fun bit about him dating Lizzie. And one of his origins in Afterlife SMP was a thunderborn

#2 Hera Cabin: Scott Scott: Scott's whole thing is loyalty. Hera is the goddess of marriage and is insanely loyal to Zeus. However, I feel like Hera should get at least one affair. So now Scott can use peacocks as weapons.

#3 Poseidon Cabin: Skizz Skizz: Poseidon kids tend to be really, really loyal to a fault and heroic, both qualities I think Skizz possesses.

#4 Demeter Cabin: Sausage, Shelby, Bdubs, Stress Sausage: This man built Sanctuary in a jungle and has flowers in his hair. He sells wood. There is no other place to put him. Shelby: Mushroom gnome, spooky mangrove witch, powerful storm witch, i need not continue. Bdubs: Moss man. Stress: SHE HAS FLOWERS

#5 Ares Cabin: Martyn, False Martyn: His planet is Mars, which is the roman version of Ares. He ended Limited Life in such a violent way, i can't help it. He was also red for the majority of Secret Life. False: I just feel like False should get to kill people more often.

#6 Athena Cabin: Grian, Pix, Owen, Xisuma Grian: This sums it up pretty well

Pix: Smart man. Archeologist and definitely a nerd. I wanna see him skipping out on training just so he can read history books. Owen: He likes to explore and discover new things in Pirates. In Rats, he's a tinkerer. In New Life, he's an explorer who wants to study hybrids. In Empires, he's a Llama who's curious about how humans work. Just a very curious character overall. Xisuma: Admin. I'm not elaborating.

#7 Apollo Cabin: Gem, Oli, Lyarrah Gem: She is an Apollo kid because of her Empire in S2. She's the sunlight princess. Apollo kid. Oli: MUSIC. MAN. Lyarrah: She writes the captions for the hermitcraft recap.

#8 Artemis Cabin: Pearl Pearl: Y'know, Artemis could've just like... had a kid, even though she took that oath. It wouldn't even have to be with a guy. Gods can change to whatever gender they want. Anyway, Pearl gets to be an Artemis kid because her symbolism is moon, she loves dogs, and will commit murder and hunt at night.

#9 Hephaestus Cabin: Doc, Mumbo, Tango, Impulse, Cub, Zedaph, Fwhip, Iskall Doc: Redstone Mumbo: Redstone Tango: Redstone Impulse: Redstone Cub: Redstone Zedaph: Redstone Fwhip: Redstone AND has a red scarf (don't ask me how that's relevant) Iskall: Redstone

#10 Aphrodite Cabin: Keralis Keralis: Okay, I don't know why, but Keralis gives me the vibes of a very charming person. His voice is nice to listen to, so imagine how useful it'd be if I gave him charm speak.

#11 Hermes Cabin: Scar, Etho, Joe Scar: Trader Scar, scammer extraordinar. Etho: All i must say is Shady-E's. I get "jack-of-all-trades, master of none, often better than master of one" vibes from him. He's funny, he's mischievous, it just works. Joe: Comedy man. Excellent delivery. And, yet again, i look at this man and go "That right there is a multi-talented man with a habit for mischief."

#12 Dionysus Cabin: Joey, Beef Joey: *points at his season one empires theme* i need not say more Beef: Idk, food. I don't really have a reason. I don't know too much about Beef.

#13 Hades Cabin: Zloy Zloy: Zombie man. He writes the Hermitcraft recaps in the dark at 2am with nothing but pure spite.

#14 Iris Cabin: Katherine Katherine: SHE. HAS. COLORS. and also I couldn't put her in Demeter cabin because Shelby is already there and i am NOT excluding Nature Wives from this au

#15 Hypnos Cabin: Bigb, XB, Wels Bigb: Sleepy stuff, right? WRONG. Gaslight. Go in everyones dreams, make fake prophecies, peace out, and cause chaos. XB: I look at his fanon design, I see an alien, and I go "aha he sleeps" Wels: This guy (@dingdinghq) said so and i completely agree. Something about sleeping in S6.

#16 Nemesis Cabin: Edit: wels not here no more

#17 Nike Cabin: Ren Ren: VICTORY. I don't know much about Ren's story in the Life Series, but I look at this man and see someone who has won a lot.

#18 Hebe Cabin: 

#19 Tyche Cabin: TFC TFC: Man goes mining and gets really lucky. That's it.

#20 Hecate Cabin: Lizzie, Cleo, Jevin Lizzie: Witchy vibes. Also, Arson. Cleo: Arson. She uses her magic for Arson. Jevin: He's a magic slime. Also, Arson. All Hecate kids love Arson.

[salford-blues]

Dressed to impress

A/n: I am so not ready to go back to Uni. So fics might slow down a bit because this semester might take a toll on me haha.

Pairing: F1 grid x driver!reader Summary: Y/N shows off her little family to the world, in which they're all dressed to impress. Well most of them are <33 Warnings: like a swear word

@yourusername and @l/nandcompany

liamlawson30, georgerussell63, landonorris & others liked

My new account for my little companions! Just a fun little account for my many pets.

Left - Thackery (12), Middle - Cosmic Creepers (8), Right - Oogie Boogie (8)

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alex_albon booooooo!! Just trying to copy now 👎

> yourusername i cant just let their cuteness go to waste

>> alex_albon you know what... fairs. Cossie is very cute

User.1 eeeeeee soso cute

User.2 Thackery doesn't look very happy

> yourusername that because Alex didn't bring is favourite treat...

>> alex_albon heeyy i forgot!! Tell him I'm sorry. pleassee

>>> yourusername he said he'll forgive if you bring him some next time!

>>>> alex_albon deal!!

landonorris do NOT let Cosmic Creepers fool you. He may be cute, but he's possessed. I'm telling you

> oscarpiastri dramatic, and for what?

@l/nandcompany and @yourusername

oscarpiastri, charles_leclerc, logansargeant & others liked

Omg, I've never looked so good...

Left - Kismet (9), Middle - Itchy (3), Right - Knuckles (1)

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User.3 how do you come up with these names???

> yourusername most of them are named after characters!!!

charles_leclerc hahaha... veryyy funny caption

> yourusername knew you'd like it

User.4 how many pets do you have?

> yourusername faaarr too many.

User.5 surely this is animal abuse...

User.6 Why does she have a hedgehog?? I thought they were illegal in some states

> yourusername 1. I rescued him and 2. not everyone lives in the states babes <33 but thanks for the concern

@l/nandcompany and @yourusername

mickschumacher, lewishamilton, logansargeant & others liked

Having a fursome time. Managed to snag a pic before Diablo fought the camera. 🐾

Left - Diablo (3), Middle - Meeko (2), Right - Prometheus (5)

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User.6 Diablo looks very cool.

> yourusername Diablo likes to tell people to 'fuck off'... wonder were he got that from

>> yourusername looking at you @liamlawson30 👀👀

>>> liamlawson30 don't know what you're on about 😤

>>>> yourusername sure you don't. Just like you don't remember teaching him to attack people when they're smacking their lips.

>>>>> User.12 that is a very valid reason to attack someone

logansargeant look how sophisticated Meeko looks

> yourusername oh wow, that's a big word coming from you

>> logansargeant i try to be nice and this is what i get in return...

>>> oscarpiastri yh but you're american. it's why you get bullied

roscoelovescoco whens cans I's comes round agains?

> yourusername soon Roscoe!! Prometheus and Itchy miss you

@l/nandcompany and @yourusername

frederikvestioffical, georgerussell63, danielricciardo & others liked

We wish you a merry christmas and aaaaa happpyyyy newwwww yeaaarrrr 🎄🎄🎄

Left - Ankyl (6), Middle - Bandersnatch (2), Right - Scorchito (2)

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User.7 why are all these animals so cuuutteeee

User.8 cuteness overload... think I'm gonna die

User.9 Ankyl isn't very christmassy

> yourusername I couldn't find his christmas picture, so I had to put his halloween one up instead

porschef1 hmmm meet and greet when??

*yourusername liked comment*

User.10 do any of them have a favourite person/driver? do any of the hate one of the drivers?

> yourusername yes and yes!! some examples: all of the cats HATE Lando, but Itchy loves him. The cats like Oscar, Alex, Liam, George etc. The ferrets are fond of Fred Vesti and Charles. The bird likes noone... he will attack at any point. ESPECIALLY when you're singing. He's a very naughty boy and we can blame Liam for that.

>> User.11 Liam and Lando catching strays left, right and centre.

maxfewtrell Lando looks like he might cry. Keep talking

> yourusername well I'll send Itchy his way. That'll cheer him up

>> landonorris thanks gonna keep him now

>>> yourusername right... grounded for 3 months.

>>>> landonorris 3 MONTHS???? WHY???

>>>>> yourusername cause the cats told me to

>>>>>> landonorris this is bullying!!

@yourusername and @l/nandcompany

mickschumacher, liamlawson30, oscarpiastri & others liked

Meet our newest member Koda 🐻

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User.13 awweee he's so fluffy!!

oscarpiastri I want to be the first one to meet him

> mickschumacher too late...

>> oscarpiastri I SAW THAT

>>> oscarpiastri NNOOOOOO

User.14 wait Mick was the first to meet him? Awweee

> logansargeant NO not 'awweee'. Why was Mick the first one Birdie?? Why not me? Why not Oscar? Do you not love us?

>> yourusername why so dramatic? Can we appreciate Koda's cuteness instead ta

mickschumacher so cute!! Can't wait to meet him 💙💛

> logansargeant you can't sweet talk your way out of this Mick

>> oscarpiastri LIAARRR... count your days Mick

>>> yourusername stop threatening the poor boy or else you can join Lando

>>>> oscarpiastri no please I'll be nice. Promise 🙏

[signanothername]

Hey, do you think it'd be funny if Killer and Nightmare gossiped about other people together? One of the few moments they actually vibe together (aside from the chess, although that's debatable given how pissed Nightmare's gotta be at losing), and it's just talking smack about others

(Partially inspired by me hearing this TikTok audio which was Ye Olde English 'He's a 10'. Which they could do too. I personally headcanon Nightmare aroace, or at least on the spectrum, but it'd be funny if he didn't know, but Killer did. So they just trash talk people who try to hit on Nightmare, because they're messed up morally, at least one if not both is aroace-spec, and it's FUNNY)

Funny enough Anon, I actually described Nightmare and Killer as “Gossip Girls” before, the linked post is more referring to the fact Killer is the one bringing info/intel back to Nightmare, (I like to think of Killer as the spy/scout of the team beside being Nightmare’s right hand man) but the caption still holds truth to it, as I fully love to believe them to be gossip girls

And them gossiping is definitely one of the very few times Nightmare treats Killer on a bit of an equal ground to him (who knew Nightmare’s capable of it xhhxhxhx)

And same Anon sammmmeee!!! I like to believe Nightmare to be specifically a repulsed Aro and a grey Ace >:))) and I actually like to believe Killer’s demisexual, they’re both on the ace spectrum your honor <333333

But it’d honestly be funny to see them gossiping by going “he’s a 10” bxhxhdh

I honestly like to believe they literally gossip beyond even that, all into people’s relationships, way of life, where they live, etc, and they can be relentless

Anyway someone should make animatics of Iamtonytalks’ gossip vids with Killer and Nightmare this instant or I shall do it myself (if my motivation doesn’t fail me guvujv)

[praetorqueenreyna]

well i AM asking for the essay on modern ACOTAR fandom please🙏😩

YOU ARE ALL ENABLERS!!! FINE I SHALL WRITE MY ESSAY!!!!! I'm putting it under a read more because I'm embarrassed of how long it is.

ACOTAR fandom is strange in a fascinating and NOT FUN way. Fandom has gotten SO restrictive recently, it's suffocating. And idk what it is about ACOTAR, but its fans are among the WORST. Whatever discourse you've seen in other fandoms, multiply it by 10 to get the experience of being in mainstream ACOTAR fandom. It is an unchallenged belief in this fandom that writing, drawing, or consuming any kind of content that isn't 100% healthy in the real world means that you - YOU!!!!! - are a danger to real life human beings. Criticizing a character's choices and the author's writing decisions is warped into you being an abuse apologist and also you probably yell at abuse victims in real life. A drawing of Tamlin and Elain sitting in a garden is now a disgusting acceptance of real life abusers and you're traumatizing every abuse survivor.

I can think of countless examples off the top of my head of real life human beings being harassed and bullied and called all kinds of nasty names for the fictional content they create about fictional characters. Like, I cannot stress enough the irony of these puritans spouting off in woke-enese about how "dangerous" certain fans are being incredibly verbally and emotionally abusive to people in this fandom. A fanartist on Instagram was painting portraits of each of the ACOTAR characters, and as a fun framing device, each painting was meant to be a painting that Feyre would make, and the captions talked about how the artist thought Feyre would paint this character. A charming and delightful series taking advantage of the fact that the main character is a painter, right? WRONG!!! This artist did a painting of Tamlin, and she was raked across the coals for DARING to even IMPLY that Feyre ever even THOUGHT about Tamlin or could even CONSIDER forgiving him enough to paint him. She was accused of "forcing an abuse survivor to think about her abuser." Like, do you see how absurd that is?? Feyre isn't real!! Nobody forced anybody to do anything! That's the kind of batshit insane nonsense we're dealing with.

Not to mention any depicition or joking about the series' villains is seen as you endorsing REAL LIFE VILLAINY!! me and my friends are constantly under fire for DARING to enjoy villainous characters or dark content. I feel like I shouldn't even have to say it, but the content that you create and consume doesn't say anything about you as a person. People who are very well adjusted, kind, and happy will engage with dark content for a variety of reasons. Some use it as a coping/healing mechanism, some just find dark content fascinating and worthy of exploration, and some people have dark fantasies. This fandom behaves as if the things you make and consume are examples of what you consider "healthy" and things that you want to do to real life people. It's INCONCEIVABLE to them that you could enjoy something in fiction and not endorse it in real life. INCONCEIVABLE!!

Aside from the irony of people claiming to battle against toxicity screaming violent insults at real life people over fictional characters, this is very very funny. Those of us that have been in the rarepair trenches in other fandoms can't help but laugh at these grown ass women losing their minds because somebody drew a blonde man. The culmination of this has been the runners of Elain Week refusing to even SEE characters they don't like. The visage of Tamlin will shatter their fragile minds and send them to their early graves. And this isn't even TOUCHING how their standard for which characters are Acceptable and which ones aren't is almost solely decided by what the author has explicitly stated and not based on any critical thinking or analysis.

The sheer and utter absurdity of this fandom in particular being SO hung up on canon should be studied. SJM is such a poor writer that she contradicts canon within the same book. I am firmly convinced that nobody actually reads her novels all the way through before they are published. This canon is bad. Which is why it's so baffling that this fandom in particular is so obsessed with canon and what the author has stated both within the books and in interviews. SJM says this character is bad, and so they are BAD!!! This character is good, and so they are GOOD. Oftentimes if you see people try to tear down Tamlin, they'll bring up SJM saying that he's abusive in interviews, talking about how she doesn't like him, and bringing up that she put a hotline for abuse survivors in the back of one of the books. SJM has said that he's an abuser, and so therefore he IS, and there is no further investigation.

Again, a kindergarden concept I didn't think I'd have to explain to a bunch of grown adults on the internet, but a creator's intention is not the end all be all of discussion. It's certainly a part of the analysis, but it is also up to the reader to determine if the author has convinced you of the story they're trying to tell. For example, the creator Joss Whedon clearly created Buffy the Vampire Slayer to be a feminist, empowering show for women. However, the viewer can watch the show and point out areas where he failed in this intention and allowed misogyny, racism, and homophobia to seep into his works. Imagine if every time you tried to criticize a "feminist" show made by a man, the fans screamed at you that the creator said it's feminist, and so therefore it is, and that's the end of that.

This is PARTICULARLY galling with SJM's villains. A lot of them are just...not written well, or convincingly, or realistically. BUT a lot of them are sexual predators, and so any discussion about them and their character is cut off at the source. SJM tells you that these people are BAD GUYS and you have to accept it, otherwise you're defending r*pists. It's especially hilarious because a lot of her "good" guys also commit many horrible acts. Part of the hilarity of the Elain Week nonsense is that the man that the creators ship Elain with, Azriel, is a PROFESSIONAL TORTURER. But SJM says he's good and sympathetic, so therefore, he is. And it's an entirely different essay to go into how SJM portrays her female villains, and I got Cancelled for it last time I tried so NO YOU CANT MAKE ME!!!

Lastly, I'll mention the bloated victim complex of people that like popular things. Again, not unique to ACOTAR fandom, but certainly very prevalent. The people who are in the majority NEED to feel like they're the underdog, fighting the good fight. Hence having the people who like one of the MAIN CHARACTERS and one of the Top 5 Most Popular Ships acting like they are Jesus on the cross for shipping Elain and Bland Dude #4. They work themselves into a paranoid frenzy, feeling attacked at every twist and turn. I would bet my LIFE that the people that run Elain Week have never even seen Beron/Elain content, let alone had it submitted to their event. But they got themselves all worked up about the Evil Tamlin Cabal RUINING THE EVENT that they made these rules that are simply ridiculous. And it backfired on them. Me and my friends have been accused of ruining other character weeks for making content for ships that WE like but the moderators don't. They'll see one single Rhysand/Tamlin drawing and act like you've fucking shot them. They genuinely feel like nobody likes Feyre or Rhysand, the most popular characters, and everyone supports Tamlin. It's insane and they need to get offline. I've seen people wearing Night Court merch in real life. Trust me, you won. You are not the victim.

[rosielovesspence]

Heart-Shaped Sunglasses

Summary: The one where you’re a TikToker and he’s an actor, no one knows you’re dating until it is accidentally revealed by a show host.

  “And we have an amazing guest of Jack Champion!” Drew Barrymore welcomed Jack onto the show. Talking about his TikToks before Drew brought up his coffee order, a small Spider-Man on the cup. “Oooh, you like Spider-Man?” Before Jack could think up an excuse for liking Spider-Man he just spoke. “Oh yeah, but it’s on there because my girlfriend loves Spider-Man, like with a passion. Her favorite to date!” He had rambled on about his girlfriend before even noticing. “Awww cute! You seem lovestruck, who is this girl??” Jack flushed and dismissed the question so she went on to talking about favorite TikToks. “Oh, I really like this one, tell me if you’ve heard of her Jack, Y_n.luvs.dilfs.” Jack flushed, it was very visible on the camera. “She and her boyfriend post such cute videos, oooh she posted a new one!” 

     Drew pulled the TikTok up with the display behind them. Y/n dancing around with a boy, his face covered by a Spider-Man sweater, she had made Jack buy that. She then pulled up the newest one, being Y/n leaning over her camera, holding a coffee cup caption being, “When your bf gets your barista to draw Spider-Man and Hello Kitty on your cups :)” As she turned around walking toward the boy in the Spider-Man sweater, a Spider-Man backpack on her back and a Hello Kitty one on his. Drew turned to Jack, “Hmm, that’s funny.” Jack laughed awkwardly, looking down at his coffee cup. Drew did the same. 

“Well, we were talking about blind dates and Tinder before the show so I wanted to ask your opinion on dates of such. “Oh I feel they’re quite weird, like reading a resume out loud.” Drew nodded, “How did you meet your girlfriend? Was it a blind date?” Jack shook his head, “No we just met out in public, I accidentally spilled coffee on her.” 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

       Y_n.luvs.dilfs is live! You sat in your hotel room, live on your phone, talking and chatting while you wrote on your laptop. Mason Gooding had joined your live a while ago, joking around with you about the way you guys had met. “Ughhh...stop reminding me of the bruise I left.” You remembered being on the Scream set with Jack, just walking around outside the sets, when you accidentally bumped into Mason, bruising his arm from the impact. “I am so sorry! I didn’t mean to hit you!” Mason just laughed, “It’s fine.” Jack came up behind you, “I signed you up for a role!” Mason laughed, “So this is the girlfriend Jack doesn’t shut up about got it.” Jack had a cardboard outfit on. “What??” Jack laughed, “It’s a small role, you’re just a girl at a party. So technically you were in Scream for about 10 minutes. “S-she’s gorgeous.” “Go ask her out then dude! Do it! Do it Do it!!” You laughed at the memory. It was especially funny since no one else knew you were even her. 

      “What’s so funny, Y/n?” You smiled, “Just saw a funny post.” You continued to talk to Mason when you picked up your coffee, grimacing at the bitter taste. “Gross.” you looked at the cup to realize it had Hello Kitty on it. “Aww man, he has my coffee!” Mason laughed, “He’s gonna complain about the sweetness for sure.” “Yeah he sure does like his shit bitter.

~~~~~~~~~~~

       “Jack, you haven’t touched your coffee at all.” He scrunched his nose at the thought of the coffee. “It’s too sweet for me.” Drew tilted her head, sipping her own coffee, “Then why get it?” Jack laughed, “It’s actually my girlfriend’s, she has mine.” He ended up drinking some of it anyway, not really the way he liked his coffe, but the sweetness reminded him of you. “Wait, when we met last night you had a Hello Kitty bag.” Drew re-called, laughing slightly. “Oh yeah, me and my girlfriend have that Spider-Man boyfriend, Hello Kitty girlfriend dynamic, but she’s the Spider-Man nerd.” Drew laughed, “Your mom told me about that. That’s cute!” 

    “Okay onto our next interview activity, you may know this from the Ellen show but today we are going to do a phone swap.” Jack raised his eyebrow, confusion gracing his features. “Okay so we swap phones and make one call on each other’s phones.” Jack, when handed Drew’s phone, called Matthew Lillard who didn’t pick up. Drew looked through his contacts for a moment, deciding who her victim would be, when she stumbled upon the perfect contact name. “Babygirl<3?” Drew asked aloud, looking at Jack, who’s face flushed. “My girlfriend.” Drew pressed ring and put the phone on speaker and rang her up, since she was on a live the phone went to voicemail, “This is Y/n! Sorry I couldn’t make it to the phone, I’ll call you back.” Jack flushed as Drew’s face lit up in excitement, “Y/n?!” 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

      Jack’s contact name lit up on your screen and then disappeared. “Oh, so i’m going to end my live now because my boyfriend called me and I need to call him back, byeeee Mason!” You smiled, and ended your live, calling Jack “What’s up baby boy?” You had no idea your voice was on speaker, “Hi, this is Drew Barrymore!!”  You let out a squeak, “Drew Barrymore??” You could hear Jack’s small chuckle from the other side of the phone. “So it’s been confirmed, Y_n.luvs.dilfs. is dating Jack Champion! So you bought him the Hello Kitty backpack?” “Yeah.” You turned on your television quietly. There Jack was, right on screen next to Drew who had his phone in her hand as he had his head down on her table. When he looked up, he stared straight at his phone. “How long are you gonna embarrass me?” You giggled quietly which Jack heard through the phone, “Hey, don’t make fun of me!” You both laughed as Drew cut into the conversation. “So, did you drive Jack here? If so, you should come pick him up early so I can talk to you.” You were silently fangirling about the idea of meeting Drew Barrymore as you got into your car. “That sounds good.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~

        “Well guys, while Y/n drives over to get Jack and meet with us we’ll be talking to our next celebrity guest!” Jack sat behind set, watching some of your TikToks, his favorite on being you dancing around your room with your heart-shaped sunglasses on, lip-syncing Lana Del Ray as he layed on the bed behind you, smiling. He knew his smile wasn’t visible on the camera but he remembered watching you record. You then walked up to him, a visitor badge lanyarded around your neck. “Hey baby!” He smiled up at you, leaning in for a kiss. “Hello princess!” He kissed you softly before you were both called back up to Drew’s set.

      “And now we have back Jack Champion! With another guest his lovely girlfriend Y/n! Whose TikToks we spoke about earlier!” 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

     You’ve had a public relationship since a couple weeks ago when you met with Drew. You had all but taken control of Jack’s TikTok, recording everything for him. You had even posted a TikTok together, in your gym clothes with the caption “Forcing your homebody gf to go to the gym with you<3″ Jack said that was the funniest caption he had come up with. You thought your comment was better “Yk I’m just here to watch you workout, right?” You had taken a picture with his hair pulled back, making his forehead look huge. He posted it, “Idk where you guys got the idea Spider had a big forehead.” You had commented on that one as well, “Forehead looks average dw boo” and reposted it. Your relationship was just a cute public thing now, and you liked it that way.

[princehendir]

I saw a meme that was the trolley problem image captioned "the og Saw trap" and it took me like 10 minutes to get that they probably meant "the trolley problem is a Saw trap" and not "the first Saw trap was a trolley problem". Which is pretty funny because like the bathroom trap literally actually is a trolley problem. Like I get what you're saying but they very much did put Larry in a trolley problem.

[din0lover]

Funny post of all the little "ghosties" talking moments in the captions

(It's ccbbh but also there might be some missing I did the best I could in trying to get it all lol enjoy!)

-

Signs of Pomme and Ramon

/

"Fudge I missed the sign"

"Maybe bad should stay dead a bit longer"

"Stress never killed anybody, except for the people it did"

"Isn't that cannibalism " (referring to pomme apple die comment)

-

Zinc cave

"Richas is going to die" (richas digging straight down)

" Oh Fudge not this one" (referring to cave they went into go collect zinc)

"This is limestone not zinc"

"Look how pretty"

"Let's go mine proceeds to mine limestone"

"These statements are now canonical ghosty thoughts"

"The block looks chewable" (referring to the limestone block)

/

"Canonical ghosty bathroom break"

"And canonically left alone" (after he got back from the bathroom break)

/

"There are going to be so mad at us when the eggs die" (after richas digs straight down deeper into the cave)

"Ghosties have bad hand eye coordination" (after falling in lava)

"50 zinc that's enough to make 1/10 of a drill"

"Free stuff"

"Lucy what are you doing over there"

"Later peasants I'm warping away, what the Fudge, that's crazy" (referring to richas warping out of the cave)

-

Leaving Zinc Cave

"All your stones belongs to me"

"Give me your stone I'm going to eat it all"

"Nom nom nom nom nom nom"

(ramon and pomme digging up out of the cave)

/

"Well this is the end for me I'm afraid"

"Should've taken those swimming lessons"

(Water bucket was placed down for a split second this guy is so dramatic LOL)

/

"You know, I'm holding sugar cane, it's magic, but why am I holding sugar cane? Is it a coincidence Or is there a higher meaning to it? Not even caption viewers will find out"

/

"Yep some of you realized all stream it was me reading the signs."

"Yep what you thought it was magic?, no I was reading them."

"The entire time thats where the captions come from."

"No way /j"

"The poor people without the captions right now."

/

That's it Ramon takes one call, I'm going to narrate their actions"

"Pomme looks around aimlessly "

"Ramon thinks I'm done cave mining it's probably best to leave"

"Pomme thinks Fudge dirt that means we're close to the surface but I hate digging through it."

"Don't worry we're good"

"Now it's off to do more adventuring"

"Sorry I'll stop being silly"

-

Finally out of the Zinc Cave

"You got this

You got this

You got this

You got this

You got this

You can do it"

"Freedom of fudge, worst ad time ever"

"Actually no we had some horribly timed ads."

"Dumbo, the moon, why did it translate it to that? I think there was a mistranslation chat."

"And pomme sacrifices Ramon to the squids" (Ramon fell out of the boat)

"Hey guys maybe we should take that zinc to Badboyhalo house instead"

-

Repairing the town of Fobo farm

/

Richas : "I mean I am not human I don't know, that works with tio dad and my dad's"

Ccbbh aka "ghosties" : "he's onto something "

/

"Huh bird"

"Nosy ghosties"

"Lucy Hi"

"So wholesome"

/

"3 minutes till restart"

"One minute before void"

"Toxic not the backup"

"The lore killer"

/

"Sometimes I still hear his voice" (referring to bbh it's almost like we can still hear him in the after life)

/

"There comes a day in every pet owners life" (referring to richas killing his caged amethyst crab)

/

"It is a good way to keep memories, if only bad was doing that." (That vile man he needs to be put in a panini press)

/

"I'm running out of sad music"

/

"Guys stop trolling the Chatters and telling them I died IRL"

"I can still hear his voice"

/

-

Group hug for all

/

"And it's a group hug"

"Get down here richas it's group hug time"

"Oh my gosh he is dying"

"Okay now he is good"

"Group hug richas, don't let him go up"

"Don't let him wiggle his way up there"

/

"He can't get away from The Angst train,there's a train and it's full angst"

"I love angst"

"I'm going to be honest this has been a very wholesome night but it is a lot of angst."

"Choo Choo"

-

Richas getting down again

/

"Crazy people oh my gosh"

"Gave me a heart attack right now"

"Oh my gosh they actually just trying to kill him in front of me"

"That's crazy"

"Where's you armor ?! He's not wearing armor!"

"Oh my gosh just let him die, finish him now"

"That be the worst time for a creeper to just slither its way and explode right next to them "

"Like actual nightmare fuel"

"You're going to give me a heart attack"

"He's going to die chat like if we don't see the death and no one else is online it doesn't really happen."

"It's like a tree that falls in the forest, and no one around here it doesn't make a noise."

"Pretty sure that's how it works chat mathematically "

-

Slight BBH love <3<3

- "I'm sorry chat thus has been a long stream, I'm trying to keep myself chucking along, I'm enjoying it but it is a long stream."

"Two really long streams in a row"

(Peace and love ccbbh thanks for the long streams with the eggs and other memes <3<3)

-

Back to richas and his vendetta against group hugs

/

"Rebel Richas, no hugs, hugs are for the weak"

/

"Oh my gosh they're going to actually kill him, I need to make sure to look away before he dies"

*looks away*

"There we go"

"If I dont see the death it doesn't count"

/

"This is like a slightly unhinged nature documentary "

"Bros really going to fall and die literally if he's not careful oh my gosh"

/

*commentating*

"Quick everyone lets vandalize their building even more."

/

"Oh my gosh please just don't do it."

"He's going to drown."

"No don't die drowning underwater it will kill you instantly "

"Stop"

/

"Bro really said that I'm going to maybe die someday and choose that day to be today."

"He's crazy chat, oh my goodness."

"Oh my goodness please holy crap."

"Let me build or I will die, thats your only two choices here" (even after death bbh still having beef with richas that's crazy)

/

"Yippee!"

/

"Bro better-" ( looking to see if richas is wearing armor and then proceeds to find out he's wearing diamond pants)

"I've been wearing pants this whole time. "

"Someone who doesn't have their cosmetic armor off and they just see pants walking around."

/

"Mimi"

-

Back home

/

"Confused but following "

"Where am i?"

"He's still not wearing armor either "

-

Fin (I just realized that didn't bbh say he be recording his audio too? I just transcript all this for nothing I'm done on a serious note though it was fun to read the captions and hope you find slight entertainment in what I was able to capture lmk if I missed any which I probs did well im off) (also forgive me if I did some misspelling I did this really late)

Extra clip:

[absolutebl]

This Week in BL - New & Old Tropes Galore

Entirely subjective yadda yadda. Organized sorta by favs in each category.

Sept 2023 Wk 4

Ongoing Series - Thai

I Feel You Linger in the Air (Fri grey) ep 7 of 12 - occasionally I forget that Yai is like 20 and this is his first love affaire. That poem bit gave me very Goethe vibes. Lots of doomed lesbians in this ep. Doomed love in general. Frankly? I was hoping for more oil less sad. Also, these two are making some v stupid mistakes. Also: MORE boys dancing.

Finally... who was it wanted a rain kiss? You got your rain kissing here, okay? No umbrellas to be had, apparently.

Dangerous Romance (Fri YT) ep 7 of 12 - I love them so much. They are so darn adorable. I like how forthright Kang is. Boy has no game and is such a dork but at least he's enthusiastic. I love the “my boyfriend smells good” trope that BL is into these days. I’m into it, too. The bff enemies drunken bathroom shenanigans was v funny. Also @heretherebedork your boys are couple dancing all over the damn place this week.

I guess we get the boyfriends ep next week?

Hidden Agenda (Sun YT) ep 12fin - The conflict really kind of wasn’t in this last ep. But I guess it was a fine, if not a particularly strong, ending. I wish we’d had the family conflict threaded throughout the series. It would have felt like a deeper more honest drama and the actors could have handled it. They’re ready. How pretty were Joong’s single picturesque crystal tears? Honestly, it's been lovely, boys. Not at all memorable, but lovely.

Quick pitch Hidden Agenda: 

A relatively simple and harmless old-fashioned style university Thai BL, that started out Cyrano de Bergerac style but then drifted away into forgetfulness. It felt like it could have fit into the En of Love universe, except that it was high quality GMMTV with very pretty makeup. I enjoyed it for what it was, it's just that wasn’t much. 8/10 RECOMMENDED

Naughty Babe (Sat YT) ep 5 of 8 - Am I mostly watching this for Est and annoyed he doesn’t have a pair? Yes. (Am I writing a whole revenge plot in my head: "seduced to the good side by my enemy's hot bodyguard" with him and the Tem character? Yes. Yes I am. But that’s way too KinnPorsche for this show.) That said, MaxNat really are a great pair. Nice that Dio is figuring out how evil his own family is. Weirdly, I kind of like this speculation that if gay marriage were legal rich families would use it for arranged-marriage power plays. Can you imagine what China would do with this concept if they had access to it? 

Love in Translation (Sat iQIYI) ep 7 of 8 - The morning after was sweet, I do like it when we get these scenes in BL. FYI no one misgendered Bojji except the caption writer. The screaming "discovery" scene was adorable. And I am very much falling in love with all of the side characters. I also love how aggressive Yang is, like he stepped out of a 2016 Chinese BL into Thailand. And I adore the main brother relationship.

I have to say, this is going to be a difficult BL for me to review. I didn’t like the first 4 episodes but it seems like I’m going to love the final 3. I’m actually really looking forward to the finale next week. Boy, do I feel strange about this. In other news, is it just me or is it weird to get a gay kiss from Ngern almost 10 years later? How late is too late for smooching a boy? 

Never too late...

Absolute Zero (Thai Weds iQIYI) - from 2021, Studio Wabi Sabi and New Siwaj finally brings us this “time loop to prevent tragedy” romance based on the novel of the same name. I think we can expect this to be sad (so it will likely slide down my list as I become more confident about this). Mix is a great actor, so I’m not worried about that aspect, but I am warning you this won’t be your classic fluffy Thai BL. It’s a bit slow moving for me so far. Meanwhile, a revelation:

Thai high school BL is all about the hands. I blame Love Sick.

FYI the outdoor movie they watch is Love of Siam Thailand’s first real queer movie, also featured in My Only 12%.

I'm in trouble, Ongsa is such a sunshine cutie and Sansoon is so lost and sad. Pretty sure I won’t have the patience for 12 episodes of this, but I’ll stick with it for now because a pair like this is yaoi-induced catnip for me.

Only Friends (Sat YT) ep 8 of 10 - Ah, Ray, baby, you can’t get what you want if you want the wrong thing. Also, corruption charges much? Is Ray turning into Ton or is that just me? I still hold that Jenny’s is the only story I actually wanted. Although, I did enjoy the two bi boys bonding over Freddie. GMMTV sure is making good use of Title now that they got him away from Wabi Sabi and I’m NOT mad about it (4 shows & counting). Under ordinary circumstances, I probably would have dropped this show by now. But something keeps dragging me back.

My Universe (Sun iQIYI) Right Time Right You ep 6 - This couplet ended up feeling like an amateurish short. It was interesting in that way shorts can sometimes push into unusual territory, but very slow. My favorite so far, but that’s not saying much since we've only had 3. Kinda amorphous ending. 5/10 watch it if you have nothing better to do. Next week's looks pretty but silly: You Are My Soulmate.

Venus in the Sky (Tues iQIYI) 5 of 10 eps - I don’t understand the bit with the girl, car & eyebrows. Was that all just ad copy? This show is so bad I’m mostly fast forwarding now. I mean the leads are cute and earnest but that’s it. NO SINGING! And... nothing happened this ep. 

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

Kisseki: Dear to Me (Taiwan Tues Viki & iQIYI) ep 7-8 of 13(?) - Buckle up I got A LOT to say. Ep 7 was the boyfriends ep! Look there’s a a lot of problematic going on here by western standards: age gap (FYI age of consent in Taiwan is 16) + teacher+student, but if you’ve been reading this blog for a while you should know that Taiwan likes both high heat and taboo content (and so do I) plus (unlike Mame) they just lean lube into those kinks. And I, for one, am delighted. I talk about taboo in terms of age gap here and stepbrothers here. I’ve never done teacher/ student because we don’t get it often enough (insert sad face). These are not things that I’m going to complain about or rehash, so, moving on...

I found a lot to love about ep 7: tie grabs, smiley kisses, communication, being held down, younger aggressor, AND preliminary research= all good things. They even brought in morning aftercare, and shared trauma! I love a show that’s both unexpected yet entirely classic Taiwanese BL. I love that the family appeared as a plot device and then disappeared again. It’s all highly amusing.

Gaga dropped ep 8 a week early, I’m assuming this was a mistake since they skip next week. But hey! 

Ep 8: def uhaul lesbians. Also cute queer fam moment. Ring finger biting = v hawt. Then of course it all goes south. Tres romantic means of taking the rap, gotta say. No one does gay sappy quite like Taiwan. Also, now we know why he loses his memory and Ai Di has to go in after him. Honestly, I’m not pleased to see yet another amnesia trope raise its ugly… head (why so many this year?). But it seems to be this year's trend. 

And I know there is more trauma coming, but in classic Taiwan fashion it’s all gonna be fine in the end even if that HEA is chaotic and entirely unearned. Don't worry, all. We good.

You Are Mine (Taiwan Fri Gaga) eps 4 of 10 - Oh noes, sunshine has a cold. And not from the rain... just, like, a normal cold. Amazing. But then when baby gets kidnapped, daddy gets v mad. Honestly, I am charmed by the show. It is very old-fashioned "domineering CEO puts little lady up against the wall" and it’s Taiwan, and thus I am not mad about it. This is what we would be getting from Mainland China if China we’re still making pulp BL. I am disposed to simply enjoy the utter "80s bodice ripper but gay"-ness of it all.

Bon Appetit (Korea Weds iQIYI) 1-2 of 8 - from 2022. If you have premium icky VIP you can binge it all now. I don’t, so instead I’m watching it 2 new episodes every Weds. Struggling heartbroken loser-ish office worker who lives off junk food + sunshine neighbor who loves to cook (from his past with a long-held crush). Also there is a "love class" element. Why does Korea like this conceit so much? Do their universities really engage in socialization training? Gotta say I’m getting whiffs of stalker... but only whiffs. Basically, this show is going poster child “way to a man’s heart is through his stomach“. Bit too much flashback, but I like that our chef is open about liking a boy, and I like that they remember things differently and in alignment with their own egos. And I like that we got a confession already. Ah KBL, it is nice to watch something that MUST move plot quickly. 

My Personal Weatherman AKA Taikan Yoho (Japan Sat Gaga) ep 6 of 8 - Jealous weatherman is ridiculous. Japan = queen of “why don’t you guys just talk?” 

Mr Cinderella 2 (Vietnam Sat YT) ep 2 - Ba Vinh & Minh Thao reprising their roles as Dung & Khoa what do we think? 8 eps? 10? We got the stepbrothers (or whatever they are) backstory. Also My Prettiest Cat-boy does certifiable nutcake v well. Psychopath looks hot on him.  

It's Airing But...

Crazy Handsome Rich (Sun Gaga) ep 3 of 10 - The sound. No. DNF 

I Cannot Reach You AKA I Can't Reach You AKA Kimi ni wa Todokanai (Japan Tues Netflix-Japan & ????) - Adapted from the manga, childhood best friends: The cool, smart one who’s good at everything, and his average, dorky friend who struggles. Always by the other’s side, but not together in the way they truly want to be.

Unfortunately I Cannot Reach You, in classic JBL fashion, could not be reached. 

In case you missed it?

Viki dropped Our Dating Sim the movie. I didn’t notice any extra footage and they took out all the in game/high school flashback stingers. At first, I didn’t really miss them but by the end of the movie I really did. So this is going to be one of those rare KBL instances where I recommend sticking to the original series over the repackaged movie.

Next Week Looks Like This:

Upcoming October BL

10/1 Can I Buy Your Love From A Vending Machine? AKA Sono Koi, Jihanki de Kaemasu ka? (Japan cinema release in-country only) - This one is a movie from Japan so in customary fashion who tf knows when (or if) it will get international distribution. Salaryman Ayumu Koiwai just can't tear his eyes away from the strong, muscular man as he checks on the stocks of the vending machine in his office.

10/5 If It’s With You AKA Even If I Fall In Love With You AKA Kimi to nara Koi wo Shite Mite mo’ (Japan Gaga) - from MBS a live action adaptation of Kubota Maru’s manga ‘君となら恋をしてみても. Amane has stopped loving people due to trauma until he meets Ryuji. At first Amane just wants to play with Ryuji but… feelings. I am assuming 8 eps and rumored to be taking Weatherman's spot so that date is likely wrong.

10/6 What Did You Eat Yesterday Season 2 AKA Kinou Nani Tabeta? Season 2 (Japan Gaga) - 4th installment in this series (1st series, 1 special, 1 movie prior) about a lawyer who lives with his boyfriend, a hairdresser, and cooks for him. Season 2 will follow the couple as they enter their 50’s. Slice-of-life drama adapted from a beloved manga series of the same name.

10/6 My Beautiful Man: Eternal AKA Utsukushii Kare Eternal (Japan movie Viki & Gaga) - This is the 3rd and final installment the series. The 2nd season didn’t blow me away the way the 1st did, but I still liked it. I'm looking forward to the finale. I hope we get character growth for a change.

10/31 SHADOW (Thai VIU ????) - this is a horror BL featuring ghosts and other paranormal elements in a high school setting. I'm not wild about Thai horror (or horror at all, but if it must be done in BL let Japan do it). It features Singto (who did paranormal BL He's Coming to Me) opposite Fluke N (who's done a couple horror's before). Also Fiat. Dan suffers from sleep paralysis, and in his dreams he sees a shadow that suffocates him. It gets worse when he transfers schools.

October? Bump Up Project AKA Bump Up Business (Korea ????) - BL staring OnlyOneOf that released(??) as a movie in July but is now being recut and reissued as a series. Stars NineMill and from Idol Romance bulled as a love story between a trainee who is about to debut and a celebrity from the same agency (based on a webtoon). OnlyOneOf have been auditioning for this since Libido IMHO. You can watch me chronicle their BL MV work in this post. Idol Romance will do sad but can do good kisses (Wish You, Nobleman Ryu, Once Again, Kissable Lips, Poongduck 304, Tasty Florida, Tinted With You) but I don't think we will get any in this. After that OmegaX Shoulder bullshizz buisness I am very wary of this show.

2023 forthcoming BL master post (see comments, some are inaccurate, NOT KEPT UPDATED).

THIS WEEK’S BEST MOMENTS

There was a ton of truly great stuff in this week's Kiseki, but this was hands down my favorite. (Pun intended.)

Oh and the neck kisses of course.

I LOVE HIM your honor.

GMMTV's ongoing love affair with the scent trope.

Calling out out new couple's dance trope. (Both Dangerous Romance)

(Last week)