#...which is so ridiculous. anna. ANNA LOOK AT ME

[doctorweebmd]

a really nice comment on 'nothing else fills' made me actually reread it for like, the first time in its entirety and.

wow. its... actually really good. like. i teared up multiple times and i'm the one that wrote it. why was i so mean to myself about it.

[planetaryupscaled]

Dirty Laundry

Male Reader x Anna

Tags: 22k, smut, cheating, oral, roleplay, creampie

The story is not ours, we alternate the original story to match our desired settings.

Another shift was finally over, and now I was filthy and hungry from all the dirty boxes that I had lifted. I used to clock out exhausted from all the strenuous work, but lately I’ve been feeling more—worn out.

I’d been working for a couple years to get me through college, as the early morning hours coordinated well with my classes. Being in the midst of summer break however, my schedule was more flexible, so I headed straight home.

I was greeted by a bright sunny, 'Good morning!' the moment I stepped into the apartment, bouncing my way from down the hall. It was my roommate Anna, who was often just waking up when I came home from work.

Anna was an ex-girlfriend, but after too many fights and a hundred petty differences, I was thrilled to call her ‘just a friend’, and somehow, my roommate.

As the lease ran out on my previous place, I was desperate for a quick renter to help with expenses. Anna happened to be searching as well, and suggested we split a place together seeing as how we both had steady partners. It seemed ridiculous at the time, but the fact that we were otherwise attached was the only reason we had even considered it.

Anna was definitely a great friend though, and we got along better when we weren’t emotionally involved; I had to figure there was a chance we could make it work. We each assured our significant other the arrangement would be totally platonic, despite our history, and that we just needed a good living solution for a while.

My girlfriend Minji, who lived and worked outside of town, was hardly thrilled in the slightest. The girls knew each other from school, and didn’t really see eye to eye. Minji actually warned me if I ever hooked up with Anna while we were living together, she’d have me hunted down. She wasn’t joking.

But with that said, we moved in.

It actually worked out well as we got settled. Anna worked in the afternoon and went out with her friends or boyfriend after work. I would hit the bed early in the evening and was up early in the morning. The only time we even saw each other was on the weekends, or early on summer mornings.

-

“What smells so good?” I called down the hall.

“I’m making breakfast,” Anna shouted back, “I’m glad you came home.”

“Well I’m starving, thanks for cooking!”

I set my things down in the hall and considered a quick shower. I was excessively grungy, and I’d typically hop right in after walking through the door.

“You’re welcome, and it’s almost ready so don’t shower,” she said.

I walked into the living room and sat on the couch, flipping on the small TV and rambling through some channels.

Anna padded out in her bare feet and a long baggy T-shirt, flopping down next to me on the couch. “So how was work?” she asked, looking clean and fresh, especially compared to me. Her long brown hair was damp and smelled like flowers. She pulled her bare legs up underneath her and looked at me for a reply.

“Same as usual,” I sighed. “Jimin asked if I wanted to jam with him this weekend, so I think I’m heading over there tonight.”

“Sounds cool,” she said, “What does he play?”

“I hear he has a pretty impressive drum kit,” I said, getting excited thinking about playing it again.

“You’re kidding, that’s amazing!” she said, placing a hand on my leg with her eyes wide.

I felt a little awkward as her hand stayed on my leg for longer than it seems. I didn’t think much of it really; Anna was just a touchy person. That was how she talked to people, and I was well aware of it.

I glanced down at her hand, which she moved a little to let me know she realized it was there. My eyes also registered the fact she wasn’t wearing much under her shirt, as her bare leg kept going as it crossed underneath her body.

Anna was hardly self-conscious and could be pretty casual around the apartment. She would often take advantage of having a roommate she knew had seen her in all her glory, and would forget certain civilities she’d typically have in place for anyone else. In the mornings she knew it was just us, a couple of good friends who could hang out in whatever they happened to be comfortable in.

“I’ll need to grab some new strings and fix my car if I’m going to play with them this weekend,” I said, trying to keep my eyes to myself.

Working at the warehouse store was like an intense exercise every day, so my blood was warmed and my skin was sensitive to every input. The strange combination of her soft hand on my thigh and the sight of her smooth bare legs started getting to me.

“Where are you going then?” Anna asked, completely unaware of my racing mind, “to play I mean.”

“He lives on campus,” I half gulped, “just down from fraternity row. They soundproofed the walls in the basement so we should be able to get pretty loud.”

She rolled her eyes at that one. Anna wasn’t a fan of rock music, and constantly mocked my tastes. Not that I didn’t give it right back. Our little conversations always gave us gentle reminders of why we were just friends, and never fared well as a couple.

She finally withdrew her hand and crossed her arms next to me and looked at the TV.

“The breakfast should be just about done,” Anna said with a hint of pride to her voice, “I sure hope you’re hungry…”

I looked down at myself and shuddered at how much dirtier I got with all the sweating and lifting we did at work. I was amazed again at the stunning contrast of Anna’s clean shirt and smooth legs right up next to my grunginess. Glancing down, I noticed something else.

Once Anna had folded her arms, the lowest edge of her shirt rode up and I could see more of her hip, like, all of it, and it was completely bare! Now I had to wonder if she was sitting next to me without anything on under there. The thought really got to me because, even for her, that was a little much.

She kept talking but I stopped listening. My jeans were getting tight and I felt my throat drying up. I knew I’d seen it all from her a thousand times, but there was something about the morning sun and my sore muscles that made it that much more sensual.

I was sure she thought nothing of it. I mean, I know she was well aware she was sitting next to me in just a T-shirt, but to her it didn’t mean anything. Anna was just padding around our place like it was home.

I felt bad for noticing and thinking it was sexy of her to sit around with no underwear on. My girlfriend Minji was gorgeous, but definitely not as open about her assets as Anna had always been. I started to smile on the inside, thinking I was pretty lucky to have such a carefree spirit for a roommate, and one who even cooked breakfast.

The timer rang over the oven, to which she placed her hand on my thigh again to boost herself up. I followed her with my eyes, and the shirt fell quickly into place, covering everything I thought I had seen.

I tried desperately to get her near-nakedness out of my head by staring at the television, but I couldn’t do it. I was feeling strange and inappropriate, wanting to hit the shower to get my mind off of her, but it was too late.

“Oh, you’re going to like this,” Anna sang from the kitchen. “Come take a look!”

I hopped up easily, like one does after an extensive workout, and strode into the kitchen. I felt ten feet tall as I stood next to her petite form, she waved her hand over the shallow pan of molten food, wafting enchanting smells in my direction.

There was definitely bacon, eggs, maybe some hash browns and something else I couldn’t quite place buried in that dish of pure succulence. It was a breakfast buffet in a single pan, I was so hungry I could have kissed her for joy.

Anna put a couple cooling stands on the kitchen table and leaned over to set down the steaming pan. As she did, the neck of her shirt dropped silently away and my eyes wandered in without thinking. Sure enough, she wasn’t wearing a stitch of god damn clothing under there, her breasts hung naked off her chest, and a little tuft of curly fur was peeking up just beyond them, barely visible from deep inside that damn teasing shirt.

It was gone in a flash as she straightened and turned toward the oven, but man, my heart was racing.

My fingers shook as I picked up a spatula and started cutting sections from the dish as Anna brought us some clean plates and forks.

“Wow this smells insane,” I honestly groaned in admiration of her cooking prowess, while simultaneously trying to keep my mind off some of her other admirable qualities.

“Thanks!” she beamed as she sat down across from me, watching as I dished us both a plate, “you know how to make a girl feel appreciated.”

She stared at my hands as I pulled the succulent concoction from the pan. The mystery ingredient was definitely cheese, and it stretched from the pan to the plate like a rubbery web.

I pushed a piping plateful across the table to her and began a sizeable portion for myself. Once my plate was towering with food, Anna smiled a satisfied grin and took her first bite. I knew she liked it when I filled my plate; it meant I was really looking forward to her homemade cooking.

I sat down and started immediately digging in.

“Mmmm, this is incrwdbw!” I mumbled across a mouth full of delicious food just before I swallowed. “Where did you learn to make this?” I asked, pulling another heaping forkful into my ravenous maw.

“Mom used to feed everyone before swing choir practice,” she said as she swallowed a more human-sized bite. “We’d all meet around six and eat this same breakfast dish before heading out in the morning.”

“Sounds like a good memory,” I said honestly, wiping some cheese from my chin with a napkin.

“A great memory, actually,” she beamed, half in remembrance and half proud of recreating another one of her mother’s fine dishes.

“She really knew how to cook, didn’t she?” I asked, poised to down another fork full of deliciousness.

“She was the best,” Anna replied with a positive light to her voice, “I’m so happy I get to cook for us every once in a while. Minho doesn’t really appreciate it that much.”

Anna’s boyfriend was an okay guy and he was actually a decent looking guy. He would come to our place only on rare occasions. Since Anna worked near where he works, they would often stay out, and as a result I rarely saw them together. Maybe he didn’t feel comfortable coming over with me around, or maybe they just enjoyed going out all the time.

“You know he can come over any time,” I said, swallowing another mouthful of nourishment, “I’m happy to find other places to keep myself amused if you need some time together here.”

“I know, and you’ve always been great about that,” she said, “he’s just never keen on the idea of coming over. He never says why… or at least he has a good reason every time it comes up.”

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to bring it up,” I tried to change the subject, “I for one — count myself lucky to be the primary recipient of your fantabulous cheffery!” Anna chuckled at that and we made small talk as we ate, drinking coffee as we did.

After we finished, I rose with my empty plate and contemplated filling it again; I felt like I could eat forever. I left it alone though and grabbed the pan, bringing it to the counter to cool before packing it away.

“Thank you for cleaning up,” she said over her cup of coffee. I turned to look, and from the side her shirt had pulled up casually around her waist again, like a T-shirt normally does. The way it was sitting on her legs made it very apparent she was indeed bottomless, sitting there with her bare butt right on the chair. She wasn’t looking at me, just sipping at her coffee and staring ahead.

I wanted to capture that moment, as it was pretty dirty in my own head. I knew she appreciated my tact about her casual demeanour, so I played it off as if it were the most normal meal we’d ever shared.

-

We definitely shared a lot over the years, and as we got older, our tastes drifted and our goals and dreams became canyons apart. Even though I always had a soft spot in my heart for Anna, I knew it would never work out for us in the long run.

She loved action and change, moving with the pace of the world. Nothing stayed in her mind’s eye for very long before she was off to the next shiny thing. She had always been that way, and it drove me crazy.

Me on the other hand, could rarely find something that even sparked my interest, but once I did, I’d dive into it head first. I loved to read, exploring ideas and subjects thoroughly when I found something fascinating. Anna was one of those fascinating subjects — once, and I knew everything about her. What her favorite musical number was, or who her favorite authors were.

We both realized we would never work together, but I had also been her go-to for sex between relationships as well. I rarely had a steady girl during those times, but I always welcomed her into my bed when a friendly visit turned intimate.

Sex with Anna always seemed to begin as a subtle game during our relationship and afterward. For example, she would stop by to discuss something ‘important’; then eventually she would have to show me the new bra she had purchased, or something just as signaling. She would casually lift her shirt to show off her bulging cups, and I would softly touch along their surface, appreciating the fine ‘quality of fabric’.

“It feels like it’d be very comfortable in there,” I would say, “the material is so smooth.”

“This is definitely the best one I own,” Anna would say, trying to keep on subject, “I mean you can’t even see my nipples through this one.” She would press her finger right there and push in a couple times, rubbing in a small circle where her nipple would be. Then she would drop her hand and wait expectantly for me to see what she meant.

“No, you sure can’t,” I’d say with my finger pressing in, “Are they hard?”

“A little I think,” she’d reply, “I guess I haven’t really tested them that far.”

So then I’d tease her nipple through the soft pad and pinch it a couple times to see if I could put it through the paces. I took my time with it, making sure I was really giving it the old boy scout try, while Anna just sat and watched my fingers press and pinch and squeeze and rub against her encapsulated breast.

“I still don’t see any nipple through there,” I would say after a time, “either this is one sturdy bra, or it’s not even hard.”

“Oh it’s hard,” she would reply, “see?” and with that she would pull her cup down and show me the knotted red nose on the face of her lovely naked breast. I would of course reach up and test it for hardness by tweaking it a little and looking intently while I did.

“Wow, I see what you mean,” I’d say and start to toy with it a little more softly in my fingers. As I concentrated on the bare button, she would pull the other cup down to show me how both her nipples were actually hard. I would pay equal attention to both, tweaking and pinching her stiff buds in appreciation.

When she stopped talking altogether and just breathed under my petting hands, I would slowly lean in and take a sweet nipple into my mouth. I wouldn’t lick it, I wouldn’t suck on it, I’d just leave her tender tip inside my mouth as I caressed the soft sexy skin around it with my hands.

At this point Anna would reach back and undo her bra completely, making some excuse for it like, “it even releases nicely without snapping back.” Not even she cared about that.

“Mmmm,” is all I would say around her wet nipple, sucking as much of her naked tit into my mouth as I could possibly fit.

At that point we were definitely going to be having sex, and very quickly she would just pull me up for a long sensuous kiss while we worked on shedding our clothes.

Sex with Anna was always fantastic, and I think she liked having it as often as any man. Her tastes were a little risqué, but not overly kinky. She liked to play games in the bedroom, and I always found it to be highly stimulating to say the least. She would willingly trade oral favors, and always had an orgasm during our little trysts, sometimes many.

I could continually depend on memories of our encounters to get me erect if I needed something hot to think about on a solitary bout. Having living together with Anna was a constant reminder of these times for sure, but we had also spent so many periods of being strictly friends with zero benefits, it was easy to see her as just a great friend as well.

-

I couldn’t help but wonder this morning whether she was just being extremely casual or if she was seeing what I would do if she let it hang out a little in front of me. Probably the former; it was more than likely I was just worked up.

“Okay, now I really need to take a shower,” I said.

“Yes you do,” she said, “I haven’t seen you looking that dirty in a long time.” She sipped her coffee while looking me in the eye and winked.

Now she was toying with me. I had to get out of there before I did something stupid, like saying what came out of my mouth next…

“Yeah, I keep forgetting how dirty you’ve seen me get,” I said as I walked out of the kitchen and headed down the hall. I knew for a fact I would get a snappy reply, and her predictable nature shone through like a beacon as I heard her call after me.

“I seem to recall you having a thing for getting pretty dirty for a while there.”

“You know me well Anna!” I called back as I closed my bedroom door firmly. I chuckled to myself. I really liked the playful banter we always shared. Too bad it always had to end up in some kind of crazy dramatic bullshit whenever we got together.

I put on some music and started to peel the thin layers of grimy work clothes off my body. It felt so good to be free of them after a long sweaty morning of lifting dirty boxes. I grabbed a clean towel from the dresser and headed out to the bathroom.

I hurried past Anna’s room in my underwear, as I noticed she was back in there again. She was across the room digging through a pile of clothes on her closet floor. She was bent at the waist with her feet apart, and as I walked by, I swear I saw her full naked butt sticking out.

I stopped dead in my tracks past her door and leaned my head back to see around the frame again.

Whoa… that was intense! Her creamy calves and thighs were full length on display as her shirt was covering none of it. I could almost see her lips between her bare ass cheeks, and as I looked harder, I noticed her shirt had actually slipped to her shoulders, her pale naked breasts hanging free and upside down.

She was clearly searching for something and I dared not linger, staring at my platonic roommate in all her exposed glory. I made my way quickly to the bathroom and closed the door behind me.

Holy shit, that was something else, Again I knew I had seen this girl a thousand ways, but that wasn’t one of them. I couldn’t get the image out of my head.

I climbed in and started the water running. The vision of Anna bent at the waist was burned in my mind, and I started getting hard; very, very hard. I wanted badly to take care of it right away, but I just couldn’t do that with her right across the hall.

It quickly occurred to me that since my bedroom door was closed, it also made a distinct noise when I popped it open. It also occurred to me that even though Anna looked to be very concentrated on her task of digging for clothes, she must have been keenly aware she was basically bent over nude as my door popped open, right?

Is she wanted me to see her like that? She might have even set it up to be in that compromising position as I walked by, hoping, no… knowing I would catch her.

It wasn’t looking good for me. I knew how weak willed I got around women, and so did she. What I wasn’t sure of was whether she was just playing or if she was seriously trying to get with me.

I thought about it while I showered and came up with a quick idea to find out.

-

“Hey An, can I borrow you for a second?” I called out from the running shower.

I heard the door open and saw a blurry head through the smoked glass door appear. “What is it? I’m trying to get my laundry together,” she told me.

“Well, you don’t have to do this, but I could use a little help.”

She entered the bathroom and closed the door behind her.

“Okay, well what is it?” Anna said simply.

“It’s kind of weird. I totally wouldn’t ask if I could think of anything else,”

“You can ask me anything, I don’t mind. Do you need help with your hard-on or something,” she teased.

“Ha, you wish!” I teased back, “I just need you to scrub my back really hard with this loofa. After working out so much in the dense heat every day, my back is drying up and it’s driving me crazy. I have no way to get to it. I know it’s weird and all, and you can wait until I’m out of the shower if you want.”

“Don’t be dumb,” she replied, “You need some good soap and probably an exfoliating scrub for that. Hold on.”

I listened intently as she started digging around in one of the overflowing drawers of her beauty supplies.

“What are you doing?” I asked, trying to sound annoyed.

“I told you I need my exfoliating scrub,” she replied.

“I don’t need any of your lady potions, I just need a good chunk of tree bark or something.”

“Ha ha Mr. Funny Guy,” she snorted, “this isn’t a potion, it’s a scrub that’s full of emulsifiers for removing dead skin.”

“What the hell is even emulsifier?”

“Jeez, it’s like liquid soap with sand in it. It’ll really scrape at your back,” she said in a huff.

“Oh, that sounds okay,” I said, “Should I just sit on the edge so you can foliate my back?”

“Ex-foliate.”

“Whatever.”

I turned off the water and cautiously slid the door open. Anna was standing there with a shiny white tube of something in her hand. She waved it at me and gave me a “Well?” look. I opened the door wider and kept my body behind the protective cover of the glass, laying a wash cloth over the sharp door track.

“Good idea,” Anna said, “hand me your loofa.”

I reached my hand out with the spongy ball, and then turned around and sat on the edge of the tub with my back facing out.

“Wow, you really do need this don’t you? Poor guy,” she said as she inspected my exposed back with her light touch. She dragged her fingers up and down my rough and peeling skin, which had honestly been driving me insane.

“You aren’t going to be looking at anything else are you,” I asked with a wry twist.

“Just your back,” she quipped at me, “and anything else you might leave hanging out.”

“That’s what I was afraid of,” I shot back.

I heard the sink turn on behind me and the water splashing around. Then Anna returned with a wet loofa dripping down my back.

“Let me get some of this on you first,” she said, completely business-like.

I felt the first squeeze of cream drip out onto my upper back and then she spread it around, working its way down to my lower back. It was thick and felt like peanut butter.

“There, that should be plenty, now this might hurt a little,” she warned and started dragging the scratchy cream around on my back, starting between my shoulders. It was very abrasive, and the way she moved the loofa I could tell she was adept at using this type of product effectively on dry skin.

At one point I felt a hand resting on my lower back while the loofa in her other hand worked its magic.

“How’s that, does it hurt?” Anna asked.

“Not really, but I can definitely tell it’s working,” I said, trying to keep my balance on the edge of the tub.

“Well, this should really peel that junk off of there for you,” she added putting her back into it.

“Thanks for doing this,” I said.

“Oh please,” she said as she pushed downward using two hands now, “It’s nothing, now lean forward a little.”

I leaned over and felt her hands rubbing the lotion around on my back without the loofa now.

“This should sit for a minute before we scrub it out,” she mentioned, and then she chirped, “Oh shit!”

“What?”

“I got it all over my shirt,” she said.

“Well rinse it out,” I suggested.

“No, I’d have to take my shirt off,” she feigned, “and I would be topless.”

“Why, aren’t you wearing a bra?” I slyly asked.

“Well, if you must know… I’m not.”

“What!? Well, I don’t think you should be in here like that. In fact, maybe you should just leave; I’ll take care of it.”

“Please, like I’m that much of a prude I wouldn’t pull my boobs out in front of you,” she proudly stated, “There’s nothing here you haven’t seen before.”

“True. Go ahead then, I don’t mind.”

“Well, there’s something else,” she muttered.

“There is?”

“Yes...”

“Well?”

“I’m actually only wearing this shirt,” she said matter-of-factly.

“What!? So you’re naked under there?”

“It’s just that I’m out of clean everything and I’m getting ready to do the laundry just now,” she quickly explained.

“Well, I guess that is a little much,” I resolved, “that’s okay An, I’ll take it from here.”

“What if you promised not to look,” she suggested.

“I could do that, I guess,” I said, “This is just between us then? I wouldn’t want your boyfriend getting all pissed that his girlfriend was giving me a naked back scrub.”

“Please,” she retorted, “He gets hugs and shoulder rubs and who knows what else from the groupies that are always climbing all over him. I wouldn’t care if he did find out. What about M-i-n-j-i?” she sang her name out like a child.

“Minji is Minji I guess. I’m not sure what’s going on there,” I revealed honestly, “I mean I’ve been giving it a try, but I’m not really expecting much.” While I was talking, I heard what sounded like a piece of clothing coming off.

“An?”

“What.”

“Are you naked?”

“Yes~,” she replied with a familiar hint of playfulness to her voice, “now don’t get all excited, this is strictly business and just between friends.”

Yeah right. I knew better, and her dander was definitely up at this turn of events. I stayed leaned over looking at my feet in the tub while I heard her rinsing out her shirt in the sink. When she was done, she came back and rubbed her hands into the lotion on my back.

“Oh, that’s definitely working, just a little more,” she said as she placed a hand on my shoulder. “So not expecting much huh? That doesn’t sound promising.”

“I know, and it seemed so good at first,” I said, trying to keep my mind away from the fact that Anna was standing behind me, completely nude.

“I could tell she was no good for you...” she stopped, quickly correcting herself, “I mean — what I meant was, she doesn’t deserve someone like you.”

I could feel her leaning a little closer, with her hand still on my shoulder. Something, a bare hip perhaps was up against my back. She started rubbing my shoulder and stammering on.

“You need someone who will be there for you a hundred percent,” she was absentmindedly stroking my neck now. “If I didn’t know better, I would say you’ve already moved on, in your head at least.”

“That could be,” I agreed, “I’m just never sure in these situations. I just seem to get caught up for too long.”

She let go of my shoulder and moved back to the sink to add some water to the loofa. When she came back, I felt the water dripping down my back and onto the washcloth under.

“I know you do,” Anna said as she started scrubbing my back again with both hands, “You seem to be unable to have an uncomfortable conversation when you need to. You just have to level with Minji about where the relationship is going; seriously.”

Her vertical scrubbing turned into quick swirling circles on my back.

“I know, there’s just never a good time,” I confessed, “we’re always around other people. When we’re finally alone I’m too exhausted from having been up so early that I have just enough energy to, well…”

“Have sex?” she blurted out, “I know what you do, I can hear you two going at it in there.” One of her hands left the loofa and rubbed my bare skin on its own while she continued to drag this out. My back was clearly exfoliated by now.

“You can?” I asked, “Sorry about that.”

“Don’t be sorry,” she said, “We’re roommates, that how it goes sometimes. Just turn up your music a little louder next time.”

My face burned and I chuckled, “Okay, I’ll try to remember.”

Then Anna was done with my back and said, “That should do it. Now stand up while I rinse this out. I need soap in here next to get that scrub off.”

She turned to the sink behind her and I took that opportunity to get my naked body behind the screen. My erection wasn’t full or anything, but I still wanted to keep this game going. It was kind of fun to see how far we could push it.

“Okay, you’re going to have to rinse this,” she said, “The sink isn’t getting the lotion out.”

I turned the water back on and put my hand outside the door for the loofa. She placed it in my hand and I could see the cloudy silhouette of her naked body behind the glass. I ran the loofa under the stream of water and turned the dial head to massage. That was working, but also spraying water out the open sliding door.

“Hey!” she started, “You’re getting me all wet out here.”

“Sorry,” I said over the sound of the water as I finished.

“Now put some body wash on there and hand it back,” she said.

I squirted a good amount of wash onto the loofa and worked it into a frothy lather. I held it in front of the open door, but inside the shower.

“Perfect,” Anna said grabbing the soapy implement from my hand, “Now back over to me so I can reach.”

Tentatively I turned to face away from the door and backed over to it, knowing full well that she could see my naked butt as plain as day now. I decided to stay a bit into the shower so she would need to reach for it.

She quickly began to soap up my back and remove the thick lotion without saying a word.

“Ah,” she said frustrated, “the water’s spraying all over the floor, back up would you?”

I took a step back to the door and then she started really soaping up my entire back. It felt so good and she was so gentle. Her soft hands roamed all over my back and started getting most of my sides and then easing gently down my back. Shivers ran up my arms. The smooth soapy strokes were getting to me and I could feel myself getting harder underneath the spray of the showerhead.

She soaped my back and set both hands on my hips for a moment.

“Are you finished back there,” I asked, seemingly impatient, “I’m standing here naked you know.”

“So am I,” she came back, “in case you’ve forgotten.”

“Oh, I haven’t forgotten” I replied, “I am well aware that we’re both totally naked in here now. Can I rinse off?”

“Yep, all done,” she said handing the loofa around my waist, “that wasn’t so hard was it?”

“I wouldn’t say that,” I said, turning to the side to rinse off my back, showing clearly the erection she had caused with her soapy lathering.

“Whoa!” she announced, “you’ve got a hard-on!”

“No kidding, you were really soaping me up back there,” I said through the water spray with my eyes closed. I knew if I stood in the spray, it would allow her plenty of time to get a good look at my mostly erect cock.

“Oh, uh sorry about that,” she said, still lingering naked in front of the open door to the shower, “I didn’t realize it was having that… effect.”

“That’s okay, I’ll just take care of it myself once you’re gone. Thanks again!”

“Ew, all over the shower?” she acted very offended.

“No, not all over the shower,” I retorted from under the spray, “I just cum in my hands, and then I run it through my hair for extra lotion.”

“Yeah right,” she said, knowing I was teasing her, “I don’t think so.”

I peered quickly over at her and her eyes were glued to my cock, making it swell even more. Her eyes widened slightly. I peeked at her shapely breasts and bushy cleft through my watery squinted eyes. That wasn’t helping.

“So, tell me something An,” I said in a conversational tone.

“What?”

“Why are you checking out my cock?” I asked, looking her right in the eye.

“What?” she caught herself and stammered, “I wasn’t checking it out, I mean I didn’t mean to look, I was just… well you were standing there and I…”

“Haha, it’s okay,” I smiled and let my eyes wander unapologetically over her entire bare body. “I kind of like it. I mean, you’ve seen it all before too.”

“O-of course,” she said diverting her eyes and turning quickly to the face the sink. She caught my gaze again in the mirror however, and I let her see me look down to admire her naked ass in front of me.

“I know we’re playing with fire here,” I continued, “and I didn’t mean for it to get all weird. I just want you to know something.”

She turned back around to face me; I think her nipples were as tight as I’d ever seen them. “What?”

“This remains just between us, right?” I asked.

“Of course,” she replied, “what is it?”

“I want you to know that you can look whenever you want to,” I said seriously, ‘Any time we’re alone and you want to see, just let me know.’ At that I turned to face her, my hard cock standing straight out in front of me. “Is that too much for you?”

“W-what?” she stammered off-guardedly, glancing from my eyes to my cock and back. I definitely got her at her own game, if she had been playing one anyway.

“I mean it,” I continued, “You just say, ‘let me see it’, and it’s out; just like this,” I said looking down. She looked at my wet cock again and there was a faint grinding of gears going on in her head. She looked up quickly.

“Okay, that’s just weird,” she said as she snapped out of it, putting her hands on her hips, “I’m going now, and leaving you with your hard-on, to do… whatever. Jeez!”

With that she grabbed her T-shirt from the sink and opened the bathroom door, stomping out of the steamy room.

I smiled wide to myself as I knew I got her, and also that she would absolutely bring it up again. That was the game, and she wouldn’t be able to let it go. Her mind would busily work on a plan for whatever reason. There was never any logic to her mind games, which is why our relationship never worked. I was too logical, and her little games only worked with me in the bedroom.

I finished washing up and didn’t feel the need to jerk myself off, I was too proud of my work. I dried off and strolled naked out of the bathroom with my towel over my shoulder to my room. Anna was nowhere to be seen, so I just closed the door and got dressed for the day.

-

I hadn’t seen Anna again that morning, and I assumed she was doing laundry as a way of avoiding me. I created an awkward rift between us and I knew it. I was okay with that, because I also knew she was very good at confronting an awkward situation once she knew how she would handle it. I couldn’t imagine what she’d come up with, but I did know she would escalate things rather than downplay them. What I didn’t know was why I even wanted that.

I headed out with my six-string in hand to the guitar shop and then to Jimin’s house to play some music, drink some beers and see where the weekend took us. I ended up having a great time with the guys, and crashed on their couch overnight on Friday. We played music all day on Saturday and got pretty loaded Saturday night. Having no desire to wake up in the same clothes again on Sunday, I grabbed a cab and made my way home.

I unlocked the apartment door to the sound of music and the smell of lemons. I knew immediately Anna was home and in cleaning mode. This was common on a Saturday night, as Minho would be working until about 1:00am.

I stumbled in feeling fairly inebriated and set my guitar case by the door.

“Hi,” I heard Anna call from the kitchen, “how was Jimin’s?”

“Hey,” I replied, rounding the corner to see her scrubbing the kitchen sink in her typical cleaning overalls and a hot pink T-shirt. “It was cool; those guys really know how to play. Who knew my classical training would actually come in handy one day?”

Anna was looking back at me occasionally over her shoulder while she continued to scrub. She dropped her sponge after a minute and rinsed her hands in the sink as I continued.

“In fact, I think we found a great style, combining Jimin’s technical drumming with my heavy riff… riffing… making, ness…”

“You’re drunk,” she said with a sly smirk as she looked me over, noticing the obvious impairment of my mental and motor skills.

“True,” I said, knowing she was well aware I would often stumble in as such on a Saturday night while she cleaned. It was getting to be a bit of a ritual. “What do we have to eat?”

She wiped her wet hands on a towel and opened the fridge, leaning inside. I liked her work overalls because they had holes in places that allowed me to see bits of skin peeking out. Even though it was mostly leg, there was something about it I found intriguing.

“I suppose you could make a sandwich,” she said, digging around in one of the drawers, “we have everything you need.”

A sandwich sounded perfect in my current state, and I walked up behind her and peered into the fridge over her shoulder.

“That shounds great,” I sort of slurred out, realizing I did as soon as it came out.

“Jeez you’re wasted,” she said as she stood up and turned to face me. Her nose came to about my chin as I looked down at her. I knew she had no sense of personal space, so her close proximity didn’t faze me as she looked up.

“I know,” I said, “I’m so ashamed.” I put my head down in mock despair.

“Yeah right,” she said with a gleam in her eye. I knew she loved having a position of power in a situation; and with me on the cusp of being actually drunk, she knew she could have fun with me. “Make your sandwich,” she said reaching up and tapping a row of dainty fingers against my cheek.

She stepped aside and picked up her cleaning gear again as I reached in and started gathering ingredients. I filled my arms, which in my current state was a struggle, and I thought I had it under control until a squeezable jar of mayo slipped from the bottom and crashed to the clean floor.

“Shit!” I exclaimed as I brought the rest of the foodstuff to the adjacent counter, stepping over the bottle.

“You fool,” Anna said as she came back by me to retrieve the fallen condiment from her freshly cleaned floor. “You’re lucky it didn’t break. Here.” She handed me the bottle and I thanked her sheepishly as I turned in my daze to fabricate of some semblance of a sandwich. I could feel her eyeing my every move, watching to see if I’d even be able to build one in my stupor.

“You better let me do it,” she said as she saw me struggling just to get the twist tie off of the bread bag. “I can’t even imagine what you’d end up with if I let you go wild in my clean kitchen with all this stuff.”

She held out her hand and I placed the bread in it, stepping to one side to watch her easily pull out a couple slices.

“Thanks An,” I said, blushing at my inability to function at simple tasks.

“That’s okay…” she said, “I don’t mind taking a break from cleaning our kitchen to make you a sandwich. Let’s just say you owe me one.”

“Of course, I’ll clean the next time,” I offered as a way to make myself useful sometime in the future. It was all I had.

“I like cleaning,” she replied, spreading the mayo across the face of the crusty white bread, “what else you got?”

I couldn’t really think straight, so I just went with, “I dunno, what do you want?”

She was silent for a moment, and then softly said, “Let me see it.”

“Huh?”

“Let me see it, you know,” she looked up into my eyes and then down to the front of my jeans. “You told me to just say the word, and now I am. Let me see it.”

I couldn’t believe she was using this night to get back at me so quickly. She had me mentally on my heels and I could hardly form a complete sentence. I must have looked like a deer caught in her headlights because she set the knife on the counter and turned right toward me, putting her hands on her hips.

“I mean it,” she said with the mischievous gleam she’d often get in her eyes, “Let me see it and I’ll finish your sandwich. You’re the one who put it out there, and I know you weren’t drunk when you said it. Let me see it.”

I was caught in my own web. I had been trying to get her to flinch in the bathroom the day before, and it worked. I really didn’t expect her to come back at me with my own teasing game and call me out in the kitchen the first chance she got.

She stared at me.

Fortunately, my inhibitions were down from the beers so I shrugged my shoulders and reached for my zipper. Anna’s eyes were on my hands, her raised eyebrows framing an expectant look as if she was waiting for me to get out money I owed her.

My pants were undone and my boxers were all that remained between her keen eyes and my naked cock. I knew I couldn’t get out of showing her, and it was a little different than when I did it in the bathroom. In there she was naked as well, and I had a hard-on which helped me to look more… notable. Now it was just my drunken cock on its own, for whatever end.

“Well?” she said, “I know you don’t need help here, Let’s see it.” She knew she had me, and I knew it too. I pulled the front of my boxers down and there it was. I wasn’t completely flaccid, thankfully, and my cock emerged as Anna’s eyes widened.

“Ah, there it is,” she said as she stood and stared at my stuff for few long seconds. “I have to admit, I thought you were full of shit yesterday, but you did it.” She pulled her eyes away, turned, and just continued with my sandwich. I stood there with my right thumb pulling my boxers down and my cock out for no real reason. I figured I did what I said I would, so I covered back up.

Anna started piling on cold cuts and said, “Minho is working extra late for whatever the thing they’re doing, so I’m hanging here tonight, is that cool?” Her eyes were on the sandwich.

“Sounds good to me,” I managed, zipping up my fly. “I don’t know how much longer I’ll be of much company but we can hang out if you want.”

“Either way, I’m going to finish cleaning before I do anything,” she said as she folded the bread over, finishing the sandwich. “Here you go.”

She turned and handed me the plate with the scrumptious looking sustenance atop it. I took it from her and she kept my gaze.

“Thank you for showing me,” she said politely, “you have a very nice cock.”

“Oh, uh, thanks,” I started, not sure what to say, and off my game completely, “any time.”

Any time? Did I just say that? I took my sandwich and sat down to eat while Anna continued tidying up in the kitchen. I watched her ass stretch against the thin overalls as she bent over to clean the cupboard doors under the counter. I was admiring the bits of thigh peeking out as always and my brain seemed to be fixated on her body as I ate.

She looked back, seeming to catch me staring at her and asked “How is it?”

“How is what?”

“The sandwich dummy,” she chuckled, “what did you think I meant?”

“Fantastic!” I blurted out, steamrolling right over her question, “I’ve never tasted anything so good.”

She smiled knowingly at me and turned around again to finish her work.

Eventually I finished eating and Anna had cleaned her way into the next room. I put my plate in the dishwasher and wandered into the living room where Anna was dusting. I stood there wondering if should sit; I couldn’t very well help, and she seemed to sense this and looked at me.

“Are you going to watch something?” she asked, carefully wiping the top of a lamp with a dirty cloth.

“I’m not sure,” I said, slightly swaying in place. “I feel like I should be helping.”

“Don’t be ridiculous,” she said, “You would do more harm than good. Besides, I like cleaning. It’s my Zen time, and you don’t have to feel guilty about letting me do it. Why don’t you go get comfortable and I’ll be done in here in a minute.”

It was a great suggestion and I nodded, turning my heel and making my way down the narrow corridor to my room. As I passed Anna’s room, I noticed that there was a pair of her panties on the floor right inside the door. This was quite typical, as oddly enough her bedroom always seemed to be the messiest room in the house, but it caused my mind to flash back to the image of her bending over and digging through her laundry. I started getting aroused again, and moved quickly into my room to escape the reminder.

Knowing Anna was busy, I didn’t close the door and just unbuttoned my shirt and pants, looking for my sweat shorts. I couldn’t find them so I just grabbed a T-shirt and threw it on. She had already seen my dick tonight; I should be fine in my boxers I figured.

I wandered back out and Anna was just finishing her dusting and putting away her things. She looked up at me, gave me a once over, and said, “Perfect, I’ll be back in a minute.”

With that she hoisted her cleaning products carrier up and made her way to the kitchen closet to tuck it away. I sat on the couch and found the remote on the gleaming coffee table. I was pretty lucky to actually live with someone who enjoyed cooking and cleaning. I would never ask her to do any of these things of course, being perfectly capable myself… well, sober anyway.

She walked past and down the hall to her room, and I flipped through the channel guide to see what was on. I found some documentary, and put it on to be funny, although it turned out to be quite interesting.

When Anna came out, she still wore the same pink shirt with short socks, and I couldn’t tell what else. It was probably either just her underwear or nothing again, as all I could see was leg to the hem of the long shirt which came to about mid-thigh.

“What the hell are you watching?” she said, sitting on the couch near me but comfortably distant. I was happy for the space as my cock started to harden as I pictured her naked again and smelled her sweet perfume settling over me.

“Just a documentary,” I said, trying not to stare at her bare legs. She reached over and flipped off the main lamp, and the TV lit up the darkened room.

“Give me that,” she said, holding out her hand. I handed her the remote with a smile, and her eyes met mine. They had a hint of mischief to them and she glanced down to my boxers. I looked down to see they were starting to tent and leaving little to the imagination.

I looked back up and she was already aiming the remote at the cable box and flipping through the channels. After a minute she finally stopped on an old movie and said, “Oh, here we go. Let me see it.”

“Sure, we can watch this,” I said, and then, “wait, what?”

“You heard me,” she said looking me in the eye as she set down the remote. “You said any time. Let me see it.” The look in her eyes was challenging.

I knew right then that I was paying dearly for my mistaken cockiness in the bathroom. I really didn’t think she would even take me up on my teasing offer, let alone rub my nose in it.

“Fine,” I gave in, having little resolve left anyway. I found the open front of my boxers and reached in, finding my naked cock in a semi-erect state. I pulled it through the opening and lay it out in my lap for her to see. “How’s that?”

“Very nice,” she said, eyeing up my growing cock. I was getting more aroused than I had hoped. “You seem to be kind of excited.”

I looked at my bulging cock, “It would seem so. Have you seen it now?”

“I don’t know,” she said with the sly and teasing tone I knew so well. “You could put him away, but I’ll probably just ask you again, so why don’t you just leave him out for a while to save us the trouble?”

Now she was playing with fire. She wanted to me just sit there and watch TV with her, my bare cock lying out the whole time!

“Are you serious right now?” I asked incredulously.

“Dead serious,” she looked me in the eye with a challenging stare.

“I’ll take my chances,” I muscled up my last remaining nerve and tucked my member back inside my shorts.

“Fine by me,” she said and looked back at the screen. We sat there for a while as the movie played, and honestly, I couldn’t have cared a wit about it. It was some black and white romance thing from the 50’s, and I just never got those. I watched it though, waiting nervously for what I knew was sure to come.

“I’ll let you change the channel if you show me again,” she said out of the blue after about ten minutes. I couldn’t believe she was being so bold, and I was the one who had opened this door, all because I saw her bent over with her ass sticking out.

“Jesus An, what’s with you tonight?” I had to ask.

“Show me, I don’t need to explain myself. If I want to see your cock you have to show me, so let’s see it.”

I was in deep shit now, and I could only respond by lifting my ass up and sliding my boxers down my hips and to my ankles. “There, happy?” I retorted as she openly turned to stare at my nude lower half.

“I guess,” she said simply. “Nice cock. Do you still stand behind what you said in the bathroom?”

Thanks to the sandwich I was able to think about that one. It was a little thrilling to be sitting there with my cock out around her. I knew that neither of us could breathe a word of this to anyone, but we were also adults. “I do.”

“I’m glad,” she said and handed me the remote, glancing down to my cock again. I took the controller and started to surf channels, stopping on a movie I knew we would both enjoy, and it had just started.

“Oh, that’s a good one,” she said, turning back to the screen. We watched for a few minutes, and then I saw her look at my lap again. She saw me notice and smiled sweetly. She was really getting off having my cock next to her to look at. My bulge had subsided, and I was a little happy for that, but not for long.

She must have noticed too, because she leaned back on the couch and pulled up a knee to her chest, allowing her t-shirt hem to drop down her thigh, exposing nothing but bare skin all the way to her naked ass cheek.

Fuck.

She had been sitting there again with a completely bare ass, and I had only just caught up when I dropped my boxers. The thought traveled instantly to my manhood and I felt it begin to inflate at a furious rate.

The little vixen! I saw her smirk and peek to the side to see if her little show had the intended effect, and of course it did. Now she really let me have it.

“Holy shit, are you getting hard right now??”

Damn you Anna. I pretended not to hear, or that I had no comment, and she continued to push me.

“What’s getting into you? I mean this movie isn’t that exciting, is it?”

“Did you just realize that I’m not wearing anything under here again? Is that it?” she added.

She knew it was. “My god, you’re totally hard, look at you! You really like knowing my pants are off don’t you? You’re so bad!”

“Me?” I finally said, “You were the one wearing almost nothing on Friday morning when I came home, and now?” I should have kept my fool mouth shut.

“Is that it? Is that what this was all about? Did I turn you on running around with just a shirt on in my own place? What were you thinking about my tits while you ate my home cooked breakfast?”

I was a little too annihilated to come up with a coherent response.

“You were!” a look of shock and accusation crossed her face as I looked away. “You can’t hide it! Is that why you called me into the bathroom? Did I get you all worked up?”

“You didn’t have to stay, or take your shirt off you know,” I was able to construct an intelligible sentence out of somewhere. My mind was still aware I was in hot shit.

“You liked that though, didn’t you? Did you get a good look?”

I didn’t want to fight with her sitting there with our pants off, so I tried to turn the tables. “Show me.”

“What!?”

“You heard me. Show me.”

“Oh no, you don’t get to say that. Only I do. That was your idea,” she squinted, her challenging eyes on me.

“I never said it was just for me to say, and it’s only fair. I’ve shown you, and now I’m totally out here. Don’t think you can handle the tension? Come on Anna… just show me.”

A slow and silent resolve crossed her face.

“Fine, just a peek,” was all she said, leaning back and dropping her foot to the floor. From there her legs slowly crept apart, the shirt still covering any view between her legs.

“I can’t see anything.”

She spread her legs wider, one of them touching my own as it moved. Her shirt crept higher until I could just see her curly little hairs and the protruding lips of her… pussy.

“Mmm, good girl,” I murmured in a cocky tone, and Anna instantly snapped her legs together.

I definitely recognized the telltale puffiness between her legs in my momentary glimpse, the shine of the television lighting her up. I’d seen Anna in this highly aroused state so many times. I knew how stimulating everything was to her once the heavy weight of arousal set in.

“Oh, you’re wearing panties,” l said, knowing full well she wasn’t, “I thought you weren’t.”

“I’m not, you dummy,” she said, her playful look telling me everything I needed to know. I sat silent for a minute, waiting patiently for her next move.

Slowly Anna parted her legs again, and the empty space between her bare thighs began to grow. This time she reached down and raised the edge of her shirt, clearly showing me her private fur in the process. She gently tilted her hips so her swollen lips puckered out clearly from underneath again.

“See,” she snorted, with as much of an act as she could muster. I knew her heat was rising. She loved the fact that my naked cock was right next to her and pumped full of steam. I was sure she knew she’d have me pull it out again, even while she was in her room changing. Her pussy was probably already soaking wet while she decided to come out in just a shirt.

Oh you horny little minx.

“Oh my god,” I said softly, ‘you’re serious.’ She let me stare between her legs for a minute, looking down there herself. “Look at that beautiful pussy,” I said, knowing compliments would keep it out a bit longer.

“Don’t get any ideas mister,” she said, keeping her eyes fixed on her own distended labia.

“Like what?” I asked with a hint of drawing her out in my voice.

“Like whatever ideas your hard-on is having there,” with that she turned her head and stared right at it. I looked at my cock and it was long and quivering with excitement.

“What, this hard-on?” I asked softly, wrapping my fingers around it and slowly pumping it up and down next to her.

Her mouth stopped working for a second as she watched me blatantly holding and stroking my naked cock in the bright glow of light. Her eyes were hooded and she seemed mesmerized by my movements.

Anna just watched in silence with her legs open, until her words finally appeared, “What are you doing?”

I didn’t answer, I just kept looking between her legs and slowly moving my cock up and down my erect shaft in the dim light.

“I can’t help it,” I finally whispered, “I’m too hard.”

She seemed to snap out of it, and slowly pulled her thighs back together until they touched in front of her. Her shirt was still up however, and the curly hairs between her legs formed a little brown shrub in the middle of her deep crevice.

“Well help it,” she said quietly and somewhat begrudgingly.

“Fine,” I said, and slowly backed my hand away. My bare hardness pulsed with anticipation and excitement, lightly swaying of its own accord in my pants less lap. She could hardly force herself to look away, but did so and crossed her legs, folding her arms under her obviously unencumbered breasts. Her pointy nipples were so hard that a mere t-shirt was hardly a challenge for their aggressive prodding.

I knew better than to make any additional comments or take further action, as just my throbbing cock out next to her was surely driving her deeper into her own perverted fantasies. What we were doing was completely wrong, and against everything we swore to when we agreed to be roommates. We hadn’t crossed any physical lines, except maybe for the naked back scrubbing in the shower… shit.

We were already way over the line. Even my own cock knew how close it was to being submerged in the slippery pocket between Anna’s legs.

I had to focus on the screen and forget about the blatant innuendo pulsing in both of our laps. We were horny, that was certain. I should have gotten up and walked away, but the tension was delicious. I loved that we were sitting together, bottomless, unable to act on what we both had in mind.

We sat in an uncomfortable silence for a while as the movie played, until…

“God I wish we were single,” I admitted truthfully, but the fact remained… we weren’t.

“Why’s that,” she said with a curt but playful edge to her voice, “do you want to fuck me or something?”

I had to groan at her words, as she knew I loved hearing her say it out loud. I grabbed on my cock again and started squeezing it.

“Stop that,” she commanded.

“I can’t,”

“I just wanted to see it, not watch you fondle it,” she said, uncrossing her arms and pulling the hem of her t-shirt lower on her legs. “If I thought you’d be uncontrollable about this I would have gone to bed.”

“Sorry,” I said, stopping my motions and loosening my grip. The next move, I decided, was hers, and it took a while. After about couple of minutes, she finally looked at my cock again and I watched her eyes tracing it up and down.

“God… that looks so nice.” She said.

“It does?”

“Fuck. Of course it does!” she said as if I was crazy, “why else would I have you keep pulling it out? I miss what we had, a lot. No one else can compare, and for whatever reason sex was always great with us. Why do you think I kept coming back?”

“An easy lay?”

“Okay, that’s true, but it was more than that.”

She turned her body to face me, her arm and shoulder against the back of the couch.

“I always felt like I found my perfect fit with you,” she continued, looking me straight in the eye, “and everyone else gets compared, well… to this!” She gestured toward my protruding cock.

“But even though I would love to feel what we had again, I know it would only make things worse,” she admitted. “I was getting better, forgetting about what we had, but having you around all the time in such a personal environment… well, maybe it wasn’t such a great idea.”

“We both knew our torrid history An,” I said, turning to face her as well and letting my appendage lay where it may, “the odds were never in our favor.”

“I know,” she said, placing her hand on my arm, “and I think I liked it that way. I think I liked fantasizing about you more than I wanted to actually do anything about it, although right now I’m not so sure.”

Her eyes burned into mine with a fiery lust that made me want to push her backwards and let our bodies do what they were fully prepared to do.

“I know what you mean,” I said instead, trying to keep my ever-loving cool.

“Are you saying you fantasized about me!?” she asked with a playful twinkle.

“I don’t think I’ve ever stopped,” I admitted. “I know you too well. We’ve been together too many ways.”

Her eyes darted back and forth between mine. “What do you think about?”

I knew this was trouble. I was inebriated and logic was not my friend, and any fantasy I laid out could surely come back to bite me. Unfortunately, I was too turned on to care.

“Sometimes I think about the time we went to the park,” I revealed, “and how you wore those same overalls as tonight, a t-shirt and nothing else.” Her mouth twisted into a wicked grin.

“You had your hands in my pants the entire day,” she laughed, “I thought they were going to kick us out of there! Then, back in the hotel room, I bet his new girlfriend had no idea the kind of sex filled night she was in for when she agreed to come along.”

I laughed at that. “I tried to be sneaky, but you’re just too loud.”

She blushed and looked down, her gaze settling on my cock again. It was suddenly silent in the room as she stared at it.

“Gosh I want you so bad right now,” she said.

“You’d love that, wouldn’t you?” I asked, knowing her twisted mind and the way it worked.

She looked up at me. “Yes.”

“My cock… sliding in… filling that empty space between your legs.”

All of our bedroom games came rushing back. I had forgotten them, forgotten how crazy in lust they made us, but in that instant it all came back.

“You asshole,” she whispered, not even close to being angry. The air was excruciatingly heavy with sexual tension and our breathing started to deepen.

“Take your shirt off,” I said, knowing she would. We both took ours off at the same time and sat together on the couch, the blue glow of the television reflecting across our newly bared skin.

“I love your tits,” I said in honest appreciation of them again, “but you really shouldn’t be showing them to me.”

“You asked for it,” she replied, grabbing a handful of her breast and lifting its weight up to me, her twisted bud aimed right between my eyes. My cock swelled, wishing we would just get it over with already.

“God, I want to taste you so badly right now,” I said, practically drooling down my chin over the sight of her bare breasts.

“You can’t,” she said, staring deep into my soul with her heat filled gaze, “I have a boyfriend.”

“Don’t remind me,” I said, turning directly toward her on the couch. We sat face to face, our bodies naked and exposed to each other in the flickering darkness.

“Tell me An… does he eat your pussy? I mean… the way you really like it?”

The heat in the room was insane as my question caused Anna’s legs to slowly part and her free hand to slide lower on her bare body, down to her unfolding sex. I watched her fingers spread her wet lips apart and find her clit, massaging it with slow deliberate circles. I almost bit off my tongue as I watched her touch herself in front of me.

“This pussy?” she teased as my eyes climbed between her legs and tried to get inside for a closer look.

“He tries, but no one really enjoys the taste of me as much as you did. Do you still remember?”

Fuck. Of course, I did. I was practically smelling it again with the heat she was giving off.

“You know how much I love… used to love, your pussy,” I corrected myself, “and I used to keep loving it until you had to push me off, remember?”

Anna moaned out loud this time, her fingers digging harder into her swollen lips, rubbing larger circles between her spreading legs. I looked into her ravenous stare and recognized a raw need.

“You want me to eat your pussy right now, don’t you?” I asked, “You want me to suck your little clit and push my tongue in there. Should I? Should I actually suck you off right here, An? Suck your wet pussy in my mouth until you explode all over our living room?”

We were back to our old games again, and as she leaned back on the couch; her naked body splayed before me with her legs wide open.

“God damn you,” Anna moaned. Her fingers were frantically masturbating her pussy with one hand and tugging a taut nipple with the other. “You’re really turning me on.”

“I can see that,” I said, staring at her blurring hand making swirly finger paintings across her pussy. “You used to like it when I’d watch you masturbate, didn’t you?”

“Fuck.”

“An, we can’t.”

“I know,” Anna groaned, pushing her body backwards to the other end of the couch and sitting up, her hand not exactly done wading through the rushing river between her legs.

“You’re evil, talking to me like that,” she said breathlessly, “your girlfriend probably wouldn’t like you talking about eating my pussy you know.” A smile crept across her face.

“No, she wouldn’t,” The realization of this fact having zero impact on the lust coursing through my body.

“Does she suck your cock,” Anna asked.

“Not like you did,” I admitted. “Your boyfriend must be a pretty lucky guy.”

“He is,” she said with a smirk, “but he definitely doesn’t react as well as you always did to having his dick in my mouth.”

Fuck. I remember how well Anna could keep me raging for hours while she toyed with my dick.

“You always knew how to keep me harder than I ever thought was possible.”

I leaned back and pushed my erection upward, I ran a finger up and down the side of my cock, watching her eyes follow my lazy touch.

“You should really put that away,” she said without a hint of seriousness in her voice as her eyes devoured in it.

“I might be tempted to put it in my mouth. What would your girlfriend say about that? Can she take you all the way like I can? Can she choke on your cock and still keep it buried while you cum down her throat?”

Definitely not. I was practically crying with the memory and realization.

“You better stop talking about sucking my cock,” I said with exasperation as I started stroking it in front of her leering gaze. “I might ask you to do it again, just for old time’s sake.”

I rose to a knee and pointed my dripping rod in her reclined direction.

“I wouldn’t do it,” she said with her hand mashing her pussy around, “I have a boyfriend.”

“So you keep saying,” I responded, “but you haven’t stopped playing with your pussy since you stripped naked in front of me.”

“True,” Anna said, making sure I saw her slowly ease two long fingers deep into herself. I stared in amazement. “Mmmm, god I’m soaked”

I love the way she tortured me.

“I bet you could get your whole cock in here in one… long… push. Would you like that?”

“More than anything,” I admitted, wondering how we had let ourselves get to this point.

“Well keep it together,” she said, pulling her fingers out and sucking them into her mouth one at a time, “we’re roommates now. No fucking.”

“How about sucking?” I asked hopefully.

“No sucking; and definitely no touching. We’re taken!”

“Damn,” I said, sitting back down on the couch and staring at her gorgeous body again. My mind was conflicted. We could probably get ourselves off with some mutual masturbation or something, but I didn’t think either of us wanted to end the night with an embarrassing mess on the couch, having to slink off to our separate rooms. I had to think.

“Okay, how about we cuddle?”

“Nice try, no touching.” Anna said, she seemed adamant all of the sudden.

“What if I just wanted to look?”

“Look all you want,” she replied, “Why? Do you like my body or something?”

“I love your beautiful body,” I said truthfully. “Your legs are smooth, and your hips are perfect.” I started leaning in her direction on the couch, closely inspecting the pale skin of her leg, careful not to touch.

“Easy there,” she warned, “no touching. My boyfriend doesn’t like me to lay with naked men you know.”

“I bet, but I can see why naked men would want to lay with you though. Your thighs are mouthwatering.” I said as I moved my head closer between her legs, my breath warming her inner thigh. “Anna, You smell like a flower,” I said, inching even closer, “and you look like a goddess with your legs open like this.”

As I pushed in closer, I could feel the heat coming from between her legs, and the permeating scent of her undeniable arousal was spinning my mind.

“Don’t get any ideas,” Anna warned, my mouth inching closer to her enchanting pool of liquid honey, “you shouldn’t have your face so close to my ugh… my…”

“Pussy?”

“Yes.”

“Why not?”

“Because it’s not yours,” she said, unconvincingly.

“Not mine to what?”

“Not yours to…”

“Lick?”

“Yes.”

“Suck?”

“You asshole.”

“Not mine to ravish until your body explodes from the soul splitting orgasm, I rip from your dripping wet cunt?”

Her hands flew up and pulled my head forcefully between her legs.

The next thing I knew my face was buried deep between the wide rubbery lips of my Anna’s wet soaking pussy. She couldn’t help herself. I knew for a fact she had to have it, and that I was the one who could give it to her the way she truly needed it. I plunged in face first with abandon.

Instantly she was gasping and writhing on my tongue, whimpering under the insistent pussy eating her body so desperately craved. I pushed a couple fingers inside and fucked her wet hole while I pulled her rigid clit into my mouth. I had forgotten how rapidly her arousal would build. I felt her orgasm coming already, so I pulled my fingers out and wrapped both arms around her thighs, locking my mouth over her twitching sex. And then…

“Anhh fuck…” She came, harder than I ever remembered.

For a good few minutes, she gasped for breath and clutched my head. She shook in convulsions and bucked her jerking pussy into my mouth. For a good few minutes, she came, unleashing every ounce of orgasmic energy she’d stored inside, squeezing the feeling right out of my head.

When it finally subsided, she lay back exhausted. I lifted my reddened face from between her strong thighs and watched her lovely tits heaving up and down.

“Tell me, does your boyfriend do that for you,” I mustered, trying to get a rise out of her again.

“Not... even... close,” she managed with a smile, struggling to drag her body up on the couch.

“Well, I guess you needed it then,” I said, rubbing my hands up between her thighs and back down. I sat back toward the opposite end of the couch to admire her splayed and panting body.

Suddenly, Anna was sitting up and quickly moving my way. I watched as her lips approached mine and hit with a force of passion I hadn’t experienced in forever. Our tongues burst from our mouths and tried to out-wrestle each other. I knew my face was covered in her essence, but that had never stopped her before. We kissed and made out passionately. I felt her hands running up and down my body, and I did the same to hers.

We were naked on our couch, consuming each other’s mouths. I felt her delicate fingers wrapping around cock, and she broke off our kiss, relishing in the tactile feel of it.

“God, I missed this,” she moaned as she started pulling the skin up and down my erection. The feeling was immediate, and I remembered how well she did even that, it was so natural. Anna knew my cock like no one did, and was reminding me of just how well as our hot tongues snaked together, again.

After a few minutes of manual ministrations, she pulled back.

“I hope your girlfriend doesn’t mind I’m sucking your cock tonight,” she lowly whispered as she kept stroking me. Her tongue reached out and licked my upper lip... my cheek... and my ear, her voice whispering through my veins.

“I’m going to suck your cock. I’m going to lick your balls. I’m going to push you so far down my throat that I’m about to cum again just thinking about it.”

I moaned as her tongue pushed into my ear and drove a sensation through my body, I never knew I missed so badly. I was going to cum myself if she kept lusting into my ear like that and milking my throbbing cock in her hand.

“Does she drag her tits all over you the way you like it,” Anna asked in the most seductive voice I ever remembered coming from her.

“Fuck no,” I swore under my breath, feeling the tender touch of her aroused buds tantalizing my bare skin. Up and down her nipples drew lazy lines of lust onto me, dragging across my bare skin. Her milky tits dragged down my chest, and before I knew it my platonic roommate’s hot breath was cascading over my cock.

“Ohh this is going too far. You have a boyfriend.”

Anna shook her head, staring at my pulsing hardness. “You’re the one who pulled it out,” she whispered, “reminding me how I used to like to kiss it.”

With that she lightly pressed her soft lips to the skin of my cock.

“How much I liked to lick it,” to which she dragged her tongue from the base of my twitching cock to the very tip, pushing shivers up my sides.

“How I much I liked to run my mouth along it, like this...”

I groaned as her lips parted and covered the underside of my cock. Anna’s mouth was so soft and tender, and when she stared sliding it up and down my length, I groaned outward into our living room. She slurped her way to the tip and suckled on the head for a minute, keeping me in her mouth as she nursed on it. She worked her way down to my balls, and took one and then the other in her mouth, and started the whole thing again. She wasn’t even sucking me.

Anna sat up a little and looked me in the eye.

“Does she let you cum in her mouth?”

I slowly shook my head, to which she rolled her eyes in exasperation.

“Would you like to cum in mine?”

I nodded, and slowly brought my hand up to her head and gently pulled it down. She simultaneously lifted my cock upright and wetly engulfed my entire cock into her warm and delicious opening. Her lips slid down my length like a tight ring, and my cock kept sliding in. I remembered how deep her mouth went, how my cock would keep going further than I ever thought possible. In I went, and once I eased past her loosened throat muscles I bottomed out, her lower lip nudging my balls. Oh my fucking god.

It was the most pleasure I’d had in forever, and the building intensity of the night instantly caught up with me. All at once my body flipped a release button and my ejaculating muscles started pumping hard, filling my body with the most intoxicating chemicals nature ever invented. Gush after glorious gush of pent-up seed erupted from the end of my buried cock and into the sweet and bottomless mouth of a naked Anna, right on our couch.

Fuck.

My body shook and shuddered, and she kept her head still, draining every drop of cum that leak from my creamy cock like it was nothing.

After the mind-blowing rush of my orgasm, she slowly pulled off of me, a loud pop and an inhale of breath sounding off like a clap. Her breathing was ragged, but her smile was one of pride. She came back up to me and laid her soft body on top of mine and we kissed again. This was nothing new, and the fresh cum in her mouth was barely noticeable as we shared a passionate embrace.

“What did you just do?” I asked incredulously.

“I sucked your cock,” Anna replied in a hungry whisper, “I swallowed your cum. I got you so horny you shot off in my mouth in like buckets!”

I smiled wide with the most satisfaction I had felt in many months.

“That you did.” I said.

I gently held Anna’s body again as she lay across me, her soft breasts piled on my chest. The round bare cheek beyond the small of her back was a familiar landscape for my fingers to graze.

“What are we doing?” Anna asked quietly, her nose brushing against my cheek.

“Not getting caught?” I ventured, saying what was surely on our minds.

“Yes, but why?” She laid her head next to mine. “Why is it so right between us?”

Her fingers twirled my hair and I felt her breath against my neck. “I am so comfortable here, just like this, with you.”

“We’ve been over it a million times,” I began, “and we just don’t work this well in the real world. We’re polar opposites... who happen to be really awesome in bed.”

“Don’t remind me,” she softly whispered.

We lay with each other in the darkish room, naked across our couch. My mind played movies of all the great times we’d had. Weekends we’d spent locked in a room and fucking our brains out until we were sore. Days we spent apart, resulting in some of the most passionate and aggressive sex I could remember ever having.

We both considered sex a core part of who we were. Finding someone who shared this intense constant desire and who was also compatible for the long run seemed impossible. For a while we were happy to just seek each other out as a distraction from the sometimes-painful real world. Sex was a blanket, and wrapping each other in it was something we both needed, maybe on a deeply emotional level.

My thoughts were bringing back so many memories; vivid, naked, fucking each other memories and I felt my cock start to harden again. She felt the movement and pushed against it.

“You realize we’re probably going to do this, right?” I said.

“I know,” she said, almost inaudibly. “I just want to feel you against me for a while longer.”

Anna wrapped my head in her arm and started softly kissing my neck. Her lips were barely touching my skin, but the connection was immense. I sighed out a long breath of air and squeezed her tightly. The soft, wet tip of her tongue dragged along my neck and traveled slowly upwards to my jawline.

Her every contact point with my body suddenly drove a rush of passion into me, jutting my growing cock between us. She felt my surge and dragged a knee up my stomach and moved the same foot over the edge of the couch. My fingers rounded her smooth cheeks and dove between them, finding the familiar damp pool I was dying to plunge my cock into again.

I rubbed around her pussy as she pushed her thigh against my erection, saying into my neck, “I think I wanted you ever since you asked me to move in.”

I thought about this for a minute, and admitted to myself that my noble intentions were never far from the hidden truth.

“I honestly loved the idea of being able to see you every day,” I said, pushing a long finger into her moist tunnel. “I think having you around was good for my sex life. You reminded me of great sex, and I took that to bed with me.”

“Me too,” Anna said, “and I can’t help loving you like this,” she moaned and started grinding her thigh harder into my cock, her mouth sucking on my neck.

“I still love you An,” I responded, knowing it was the truth, and as painful as it was for all involved, it was the fucking truth.

“I love you too,” she said almost desperately, “I always long for what we had, no matter where we are or who we’re with.”

Her hips started tilting around, grinding on my finger inside of her. I whispered into her ear, “we’re actually going to do it again, aren’t we?”

“Yeah, and I’ve been ready,” she returned into my ear, “I want this. Please, do it before I change my mind. Fuck me,” Her panting was getting intense. “I mean it.” Anna lifted herself up on all fours above me, staring into my longing face. Her beautiful tits were hanging, and I could see my cock sticking up, waiting for the inevitable plunge.

And it was so natural that neither of us looked or aimed or anything. Her hips descended and I felt my cock easing right into Anna’s warm and glorious fit.

It was a mind-blowing instant of sexual interconnectedness and blissful wonder as my cock buried itself as deeply inside Anna’s hollow cunt as it’s ever been. We both exhaled immensely, and in that very instant, we were back.

Her mouth hung open as I bottomed out, and the look on her face was one of pure passion. I’m sure mine was no different as I ran my hands up her thighs and around her back, grabbing that sexy woman as tightly as I could.

We pushed against each other in a frantic connection of sex and lust. It was an idyllic rift in time as our souls became singular again. Neither of us could back away, and we started shifting our lower bodies in subtle circles of intimate connection. My cock was deep, and her pussy captured me so completely that I was content to simply exist inside of her.

Back and forth we ground into the other. I heard her gasp, so I slowly sat us up on the couch. She clung to me like a lost puppy, and her body was shaking from the pleasure.

Then I realized Anna was actually crying, right into my shoulder; tiny little sobs that had me confused and worried.

“Anna? What is it?” I gently asked, pushing back the hair from around her ear and wiping a tear from her cheek.

“You...” she sniffed, “feel so amazing. I just... forgot how intense it really was...”

“I know,” I soothed, “I feel the same way. Let’s just enjoy this as much as we can while we have it again... okay?”

That seemed to cheer her up a little as she nodded her head.

“It’s not over yet,” I breathed, reaching my cock into her and then pulling out a small amount, “far from it.”

Anna smiled and looked right into my eyes, her tear-stained lashes blinking quickly. “I do love you, you know, and I always...” with that she squeezed her inner muscles around my nestled shaft, “always, will!”

“I love you too,” I said and grabbing her butt, “and now we’re going to make this night worth every minute of regret we might face afterwards.”

With that Anna leaned back and onto the couch, pulling me with her and reaching down to grab my ass cheeks and squeeze them.

“So then fuck me already,” she said so matter-of-factly that I had no choice but to pull my cock almost completely free from her warm embrace, and then slam it back home with enough force.

“Oh god… Ahh” she yelled, louder than I ever remember her being, which was saying something.

I put my forehead against hers and locked in my stomach muscles, allowing my hips to start taking long delicious strokes in and out of her body. Every push and pull was luxurious and familiar and daring all at the same time. I knew just how she liked it. I knew what got her body and her mind really excited. She knew the same about me as well, which is why she pulled my face down and pushed her tongue in my ear.

The warm sensation had a direct line to the muscles in control of my blazing erection, and I started to really pump it into her with passion.

Her lusty voice in my wet ear sounded better than I ever remembered, “Oh, yeah, fuck, oh fuck, that’s it, mmmm, that’s it, fuck me, oh shit. Ohhh…” her voice trailed off into grunts of pleasure as she hugged me tighter.

My cock was sliding in and out of her like an oiled piston, and the liquid noises of sex were squelching out into the room. I realized I was quickly building up a new head of orgasmic steam, so I eased back into a more casual pace. Every bit of her scrumptious pussy was sliding across every inch of my solid cock as we connected through long slippery strokes of sex.

Eventually Anna loosened her grip and held me still, stopping our movements but holding my cock deep inside. Her eyes were wild. She was hungry, and right in the middle of a juicy meal.

Anna spoke, softly, “…from behind.”

I smiled as I remembered how she liked it that way. I slipped my wet cock out of her, and backed slightly away. She slid off the couch and put her knees on the floor, bending her naked figure over the cushion.

I admired her bare ass in front of me, again. It was so familiar; so right. A thousand memories came rushing back as I instinctively ran my hands over her naked butt and up her spine as I moved in close.

I bent over her body with my wet cock wedged upright in the crack of her ass cheeks and started whispering in her ear.

“This is how you really like it, isn’t it Anna?”

A slight whimper emerged, and she moved her ass against me in earnest, but I wasn’t about to slip into her just yet.

“Do you remember how far I can reach from back here?”

“You know I do,” she softly replied.

“Tell me something you think about with me around,” I teased, easing back from her ear, and rubbing her shoulders and neck, “something hot.”

“Don’t...” Anna pleaded.

“It’s okay An,” I soothed, “just tell me one thing you fantasized about. It’s only going to turn the heat up.”

A long silence appeared, and I slowly eased the underside of my cock up and down her crevice as I patiently waited for her inevitable reply.

“Fine,” she started, lifting herself up onto her elbows, “Sometimes... I imagine myself cleaning… God this is embarrassing.”

“Just tell me.”

“I-I’m cleaning, and I’m... naked,” she revealed. “And then you come home unexpectedly, maybe you’ve been drinking, and you sit down and just watch me cleaning in the nude. You’re staring at my body and telling me how good of a job I’m doing, how you appreciate how clean I keep our place.”

This was incredible, and now I was logging every word into a fantasy file I could use later as well. I reached around and started toying with one her tight nipples.

“Mmm, that’s nice,” she moaned, humping her bare cheeks against me. “I keep looking over and your eyes are always on me, on my body, staring at me. Then, while I’m cleaning a counter, or bent over in some way, you come close and start touching me, softly, even though I ask you to stop. You don’t. You touch my breast, you cup my ass, you stroke my neck; your hands are all over me.”

I groaned to myself and rubbed my hands over her body to match the story, feeling every sensational inch of her bare form under my fingers.

“Oh god, you really know how to play this,” Anna said, and then she continued. “You start asking me why I’m naked, and if I was just trying to get you excited. I would insist that I just liked to clean in the nude in my own apartment, and that I should be able to if I wanted. But inside I knew it would drive you crazy, and that you wouldn’t be able to resist.”

Anna started sliding her bare ass up and down the length of my nestled cock as she continued.

“You would touch me and tell me to keep cleaning. I wouldn’t notice, but at some point, you’d pull out your cock, and I would feel it against me, hard...”

I took that moment to reenact her tale, pushing the head of my cock down between her cheeks.

“I would act shocked and offended, but you’d push into me...”

Which now I did.

“OH god! Just like... that,” she moaned as my cock ran home, “that’s so much better than I imagined!”

My cock slid into her, and I pulled on her shoulders to help get it in deep. I leaned over again and started talking into her ear as I softly began to fuck her from behind.

“Is this what you wanted? Hmm? Parading around in the nude. Did you think I wouldn’t react?”

I kept sliding my cock in and out of her love tunnel, bringing loud moans and sighs.

“Did you think I would just sit and watch your sexy body bouncing around our apartment in the nude and not want to touch it... to taste it... to have it!? How dare you tease me like that? Now you’re getting what you really wanted, aren’t you?”

I grabbed her hair playfully, “Aren’t you?”

“YES” she moaned, pushing her ass back against my thrusts and hanging her head down low as I released her hair.

“And now your roommate, your ex-boyfriend, is actually fucking you! He’s finally fucking you after all this time, and you were secretly hoping it would come to this, weren’t you?”

“Yes!” she squealed as her torso dropped and her head turned to the side.

I grabbed her wide hips and started bouncing my body off of hers in a forceful fuck to last us a lifetime... or another long time anyway.

“You really need to be fucked like this, don’t you Anna?” I asked with heat and passion in my voice.

“Mmm... mmm... mmm,” is all she could manage. I kept the aggression level high, because I knew she liked it, and I pushed her head softly into the couch.

“Am I deep enough?” I started, “can you feel it all the way, my cock, fucking you? Is it good enough? I could fuck you like this every day you know. You’d love that, wouldn’t you? A live-in fuck partner to really give your hot pussy the hard attention it desperately needs.”

Her heavy gasps of air were answering my questions on her behalf.

I decided in the moment to take it a step further. “From now on I want you to be ready for my cock in the morning. Keep this little tight pussy neat and clean for me, I’ll be checking it first thing. I want your body smooth and smelling nice. I want to know you will be clean and soft when I come home dirty and hard.”

“Oh my god…” Anna moaned in a torrent of sexual frenzy as I pounded her cunt. While I wasn’t serious with my suggestions, and I was sure she knew I was just heating us up, there was an edge of real desire to it for both of us. I released her head and smoothed her hair as I slid in and out of her slick grip.

“Start looking forward to a nice hard cock in the morning. Won’t that be nice, a pussy filling fuck to start your day?”

I continued to thrust and shake her ass cheeks. “I like your new look by the way, one big shirt with nothing underneath. How hot did it make you, knowing you were practically naked next to me in the morning?”

“It felt... mmm... naughtier than I... thought it would,” she managed as I continued my vaginal assault.

“I bet it did,” I continued, “so naughty that you needed to let me see your whole body bent over in your room with your bare ass sticking out.”

“Oh shit,” she moaned as our thighs smacked together, “I don’t know why... I did that.”

“Because you wanted this,” I said, happily fucking her from behind on the floor of our living room. “How did you feel when I called you in to watch me shower?”

“Excited,” she admitted a little too quickly.

“I know you did, and now it’s out, isn’t it? You’ve been secretly lusting for my cock, and now you’re getting it.”

I glided into her a few more times and then slowly withdrew my long slippery cock from her body. She put her head down and started to catch her breath. I sat on the floor and turned over, my head between her quivering thighs. I pulled her dripping bush right into my mouth.

She raised her body up and kneeled over me, holding the couch for support. I could see the undersides of her breasts, and couldn’t help but reach up and squeeze one as I found her stiff clit with my mouth and sucked it right in.

“Oh F-F-FUCK!” she yelled as my tongue immediately began wearing the finish off of her hot button. I sucked her clit and pinched her nipple, sending her body into a shaking fit. I looked up and into her eyes, just in time to see them roll back as she started to shudder.

I knew one or two orgasms would never be enough, and I was almost positive she wasn’t getting this kind of attention from her boyfriend. She needed it on a physical and emotional level, and I was finally giving to it her again.

Her moans became screams as she pushed her pussy into my face, sliding it around, building up another sand castle of cum for me to kick over. Her hips began pushing my head into the couch, and she ground her wet soaking pussy against my face like I was some kind of humping pole. I grabbed the clenched cheeks of her ass and held on for the ride as her body began to shudder.

Then she came... as quickly as the screaming started, it disappeared, and she quietly shook and came all over my juice slathered face.

I finally sensed the full weight of release wash over her, and a trail of her cum dripped down my chin as I held her up. A huge smile grew across her face and she whispered down at me, “You fucker. I haven’t felt one of those in a long time.”

Anna leaned down and actually licked my cheek. Then she pushed her tongue deep in my mouth and we kissed for a minute until she broke off and said, “I’ve taught you well.”

“That you have,” I agreed, and watched as she spun around, her hand going for my cock. I felt her small fingers grabbing me tight, and then she leaned forward, her mouth slurping my meat like a melting popsicle. I felt her mouth softly sliding up and down my length.

We used to love to sixty-nine, so I slid down and pulled her legs over me again, diving my face between her legs. The sounds of sucking and smacking, moaning and devouring were over the top as we frantically ate each other out. Her legs started shaking as another climax was about to rain down on me. I wanted to cum so badly, but I also wanted to fuck her again.

I stopped eating her pussy, and pushed her off.

“Damn it,” Anna whined, “I was so close.”

“What, again!?” I asked in mock surprise.

“Yes, again, and I now I might need to borrow that tongue of yours to lick my poor pussy to sleep every night.”

A ravenous hunger boiled from my brain and I pushed her back onto the floor. I climbed between her legs and licked a long line from her soaking flame and all the way up to the side of her neck. By the time I got there, my cock was already pressing through her open folds and tunneling deep inside her pussy again.

“Oh, fucking fuck,” Anna wailed as I bottomed her out, my lips on her neck driving her insane. Just as quickly though, I backed out again, retracing the same liquid line down her splayed body and started another oral assault. This time I was held in place as her legs crossed behind my head and her cunt pushed up and down my face. She was ready, and I held on tight as I worked her.

This time the ungodly screaming arose, and as she flew over the edge, her ranting was perverse, even insane.

“Ohhh, Gooaahhddd, ahh Fuck!! mmm, fuck, Eat It! yeah, Eat my pussy, You Fuck! It’s, oh, my, fucking... nhhhh,”

I was simply holding on for dear life as she went through some kind of transcendental experience. It would have been almost scary, if it hadn’t been exactly what I was going for.

Anna came so hard I almost felt sorry for her; it was intense. Her body convulsed and she could hardly gasp for air as the orgasm ripped through her soul and all over my face. As she finally settled dow, I felt the grip loosen on my head, and her hands unwrapped themselves from my hair. Her breathing was hard and a little raspy.

“That...” she breathlessly began, “was what I have been missing. How could you do that to me?”

I climbed up next to her on the floor and said, “I just remembered how you always liked it.”

The smile plastered on her face turned to a look of wonder as she shook her head, and then a sly smiled unfolded from her pretty face.

“And now I remember what you always wanted.”

I honestly had no idea what she was talking about, until the very instant she pushed me away and sprang to her feet, running naked down the hall.

A hungry smile immediately found my face, and I jumped to my feet and ran after her, my erection so hard from my dirty thoughts that it barely moved as I did.

I rounded the corner toward the light from her room, greeted by a soft glow from her reading lamp beside her unmade bed. On the floor beside the bed was the most luscious and hungering sight my mind could have imagined.

Anna was on her elbows and knees, climbing under her bed. Her bare ass was up and fully facing me, and she was saying something from underneath.

“Oh good, can you help me find my phone? I think it dropped on the floor somewhere.”

Just her pale ass was sticking out, and her pussy was practically begging me closer. I walked up slowly behind her and got to my knees, reaching out to stroke the soft skin of her naked ass.

“Can you see anyth... hey, what are you doing? Help me look!” she snapped.

I let my fingers roam her glorious backside as I lightly found her dripping hole. I started to rub it around and push my fingers over her clit.

“Hey! Stop it!! Don’t touch me like th...” her muffled voice trailed off as two of my fingers plunged into her wet orifice.

Anna groaned and then said a muffled, “Knock it off, and let me out of here, don’t even think about it!”

It was too good, and she was really playing it up for me. I pulled my fingers out and grabbed my raging cock, eying her gorgeous bottoms-up.

“Thank you, now help me out of... hey! what are you!? no!”

I watched as the head of my cock push her juicy lips aside and ease inside, her tunnel providing quite a resistance. I sank my cock all the way into Anna’s upturned ass, her wet pussy licking the entire length of it along the way.

“You fucking bastard,” she yelled from under the bed, “how could you do this to me?”

I started working my cock in and out of the disembodied ass on legs in front of me, making sure I was listening for our old safe word.

The moans from under the bed were soft but growing. Anna’s luscious rump was milking my cock as I pumped her harder. I had to wonder if she had actually fantasized about this very thing.

After the thrill of taking advantage of her compromising position wore off, I slowed my pace and tentatively pulled out of her. Anna weaseled her butt back and forth, squirming out from under the bed. As soon as her head was free, she sat up on her knees and the look on her face was one of pure lust and playfulness.

I suddenly felt her full naked body weight slamming into me, throwing me to the floor. My head landed in a pile of her dirty clothes, and I looked up to see her face appear in my view, “Don’t you ever! fuck me like that again!” she warned, pushing off of me and jumping to her feet. I watched her naked form quickly disappear out the door.

I smiled wide as I remembered our games, and loved how easily we were picking back up with them.

I jumped up and happily bounded out of the room, wondering where my sexy naked roommate had vanished to. I instantly saw her across the hall in the brightly lit bathroom, and I slowly walked in.

Anna was leaning over the sink with her face in the mirror, applying some kind of lip something as I often saw her do, except this time she was completely naked.

“What are you doing in here?” she asked my reflection in the mirror, “can’t you see I’m busy?”

“Sorry, you left the door open and I really have to go,” I played along.

“Fine, but sit down,” she said looking back at her own pink lips, “I don’t want to hear it while I’m having some girl time.”

I walked to the commode and sat down, knowing I was unable to actually use it in my hardened state. I looked over at Anna next to me; her wonderfully perky breasts were slightly swaying with her subtle movements and her twisted nipples looked thrilled to be part of our game.

“What are you looking at?” she asked without turning her gaze to me, “do I need to wear a robe or something in my own house?”

“No, sorry,” I replied, lifting my eyes to her mouth, “I was just watching what you were doing.”

“Why, do you have a thing for lipstick or something?” she teased, “You can have it when I’m done.”

“Very funny,” I said as I stood, pressing the handle and rushing water into the clean bowl. I walked up behind her and said “I just need to wash my hands.”

“Be my guest,” she said quickly, “but I’m not moving. I was here first.” With that she widened her stance and took up the entire front of the sink.

“Fine,” I resolved and moved in behind her. The first thing to touch as I moved in close was my cock against the top of her ass.

“Hey buddy,” she warned, “watch your cock.”

“Well, it’s not like I’ve got a lot of room here,” I playfully whined, “don’t mind my reach.” I wrapped my arms around either side of her and pushed forward, our bodies in full naked contact as I leaned forward to reach the water.

“Well, this is awkward,” Anna said to her own reflection in the mirror, “hurry up.”

I pushed the handle on the faucet and got my hands a little wet. I leaned over for the soap and dropped a gold puddle into my palm as I pushed the top. I rubbed my hands together in front of Anna’s naked waist, enjoying the feel of her entire body against mine.

As my hands foamed up, I lightly clapped them together, launching clumps of suds into the air, some in her direction.

“Hey!” she cried, “watch it! You’re getting soap on my boobs.” She could hardly keep her grin contained as she feigned offense and stood up straight to show me the mess in the mirror.

“Oops, hold on,” I said, watching my hands in the mirror lightly touching the spots of bubbles on her breasts, leaving many more sudsy dabs in their wake. As I looked at her naked reflection, I could see large clumps of bubbles all over her chest. She just watched as I tried wiping them away, but the more I tried the soapier her bare tits were getting.

I tried to keep up the act, but soon I was soaping them up with purpose, sliding my fingers around the smooth skin, rubbing across her nipples, grabbing her slippery globes tight and squeezing them together. I was getting extremely aroused, and my cock strained against her back.

“About done?” she asked, hands on her hips now as if she was just waiting for me to finish fondling her chest.

“Almost,” I huffed into her ear. I pushed my soapy hands down her body and pulled us back. Bending my knees, I dragged the tip of my cock down the naked backside of my roommate. With almost no effort I pushed forward and submerged my entire cock into her dripping tunnel, and watched her face in the mirror as it slid all the way in.

“Ohh fuck...” she moaned as I pushed in, adding an exasperated, “What are you doing?”

“I’m just washing my hands,” I replied as I moved my hands back up to her slippery tits and held them in the mirror while I humped my bare cock in and out of her pussy.

“Oh GOD!!” she belted out as I pushed in deep, “Are you fucking me? We... mmm, we talked about this. No fucking!” She was looking at me in the mirror and grabbing the side of the sink as I continued pushing and pulling my cock in and out of her.

“Oops,” I said, “are we fucking?” My thighs smacked against hers more loudly.

I watched Anna drop her head down to enjoy our little romp for a time, and then she pushed me back with her hips, quickly stepping forward and escaping my insertion. She spun around and pushed me back against the wall next to us, getting right up in my face. She grabbed my chin and stared right into my eyes.

“Well just watch yourself mister,” she said with a commanding tone, grabbing hold of my wet dick, “don’t let this big cock come between us.” With that she started stroking me hard, her fingers slipping easily up and down my lubricated shaft, pumping me faster than I was expecting... and making her point.

I looked into her eyes and enjoyed her hand masturbating my cock between our bellies. Her soapy breasts were barely touching my chest, and her nipples kissed my flesh. I was in blissful heaven, and was seriously about to erupt when she stepped back, releasing my cock and grabbing the towel hanging on a hook next to me.

She quickly wiped the soap from her chest and handed me the towel, saying simply, “The lipstick’s all yours,” and walked out into the hall, bare-assed and smiling. I quickly turned to rinse the soap from my hands and wiped them with the towel, hanging it back on the hook.

I turned off the bathroom light and the entire place suddenly dropped into darkness. There was no light from the direction of her room, or from the living room. Figuring she must have turned off the TV, I felt my way through the dark and down the hall into the main room.

“The power’s out,” I heard Anna say from near the front window. I looked in that direction and could just make out her silhouette against the dim lights shining in from outside. I slowly approached. Being naked in my own dark apartment was nothing strange, but knowing Anna was in there with me, just as undressed, waiting for me to fuck her again, was the most thrilling sense of erotic anticipation I could remember.

“I can’t find a candle or flashlight,” she continued, “so I’m just standing by the window until it comes back on.”

I walked up quietly behind her and saw that she was looking out the window. I put a hand on her shoulder and ran my fingers down her bare back and over her ass.

“You’re naked,” I said softly, stroking her flesh with a tender touch.

“I know. I was about to jump in the shower when it went dark. Don’t.” She pushed my hand away, and brushed against my erection in the process. She stopped.

“Are you...?” she turned toward me and ran her hand up my body, “Oh my god. So we’re...”

“Both naked here in the dark,” I finished, “We’re in for a big surprise if the lights come back on.”

She backed away from me in tentative hesitation and paused for a moment before saying, “Why, you’ve seen me naked before.”

“I know, but it’s different now,” I said, “we’re not supposed to see each other... you know, like this.”

“Well... I can’t see anything,” she breathed in a husky whisper, her body mere inches from mine, “can you?”

“Definitely not,” my voice shook a little. We stood face to face, drinking in the thick anticipation and allure of the moment.

We inched closer, and I felt the softest touch folding slowly around my excited manhood. I exhaled heavily.

“What’s wrong,” her voice asked tenderly.

“Something’s touching me,” I said. Loving this a little too much.

“Really? What does it feel like?”

“Like a soft hand, on my... ohhh yeah,” I whispered, feeling the grip tightening and moving up and down.

“That’s so strange,” she said with a smile in her voice, “do you think we have ghosts?”

“If we do, they really... hhhhh, like me,” I said, as another touch moved in to softly cradle my balls. I closed my eyes, not that it made much difference in the dark, and suddenly a warm wetness wrapped around the head of my cock, moving quickly downward along it like a wet mouth sucking my cock. “Hoooly shit!”

The unexpected pitch-black sensation took me by surprise, and I nearly lost it. I felt her throat open and my cock slipped inside for a second, and then she pulled completely off, leaving my cock to balance wet and alone in the dark. I opened my eyes and saw Anna’s dark figure outlined in front of me again.

“Something... really likes me,” I said, unsteady on my own legs.

“Well keep it to yourself,” she said, “your moaning is making me uncomfortable.”

I stepped to the side and softly put my hand out, feeling for some bare skin and finding it. Knowing her body well I traced my way down her side and around the front of her thigh, feeling it open for me.

My fingers brushed past her small pubic hair and I didn’t need any light to know how turned on she was. My fingers pushed across her excited clit, and I felt her body reacting to my touch.

“You okay?” I asked with a grin.

“I-I see what you mean,” she breathed heavily; “I’m feeling a little... felt.”

I reached around in the dark and grabbed a handful of her bare tit flesh, squeezing it gently in my fingers.

“Just let it happen,” I whispered in her ear, “we don’t want to upset any spirits.” I worked a couple fingers in between her legs and started slipping them into her.

“Oh…” she moaned, leaning on the window sill, “something’s... pushing into me!”

“Seriously?” I asked as I plunged between her lips, “What does it feel like?”

“Hhhh... ohhh… a hand,” she moaned, “fingers, reaching!”

“Does it hurt?”

“No, it’s...” she paused, “strangely thrilling.”

I felt her hips grinding around on my hand, pulling me deeper.

“It sounds really good,” I admitted hearing her heavy breathing and sultry moans, “I’m getting pretty turned on here. You sure you’re, okay?”

“Hey~”

“Yes?”

“I’m afraid.”

“Of what?”

“That something in here is going to actually fuck me, and I won’t be able to stop it,” she breathed as I twisted my fingers around inside her burning bush.

“What should we do?” I asked, keeping the game alive.

“I hate to... hhhh, ask,” she breathed.

“You want me to put it in?” I offered, now brushing my cock along her bare back.

“Would you? Just to be safe?”

I slid my fingers out of her wet pool, and bending my legs I let my cock find her juicy hole. I eased it all the way in, and she groaned as I entered and stood breathless against the window... impaled.

“Like this?” I asked, holding my cock still inside of her. “Do you think anything else could fit in here?”

“Definitely... not,” she said softly, tilting her hips and edging my cock around inside her. I ran my hands up her naked sides and weighed her bare breasts in my palms. The feeling of her soft thighs against mine as I cupped her bosom caused me to involuntarily push in a little deeper.

“…no fucking,” she whispered, obviously using every ounce of her fiber to keep from encouraging me.

“I’m not sure I can help it,” I pleaded, “you feel so amazing.”

“But I have a boyfriend,” Anna said, pushing her hips back to keep my cock fully seated.

“My body doesn’t know that,” I said, pinching her bare nipples and pushing in so deep I could feel myself bottom out. I was awash in the soft feelings of her insides thoroughly soaking my dick, and I could tell our little game was about to break.

“I’m just going to, adjust myself,” I whispered, slowly easing my length out about an inch, and then pushing it back in, “like... this.”

“Oh god,” she breathed, “you can’t do that...”

“Why not?”

“It feels like sex.”

“It’s not sex,” I assured her, pulling slowly out until just the head of my cock hovered inside the entrance to her tunnel “This is sex.”

With that I pushed my hips forward and thrust a series of deep plunges into her, sliding easily in and out. Slap, slap, slap, slap...

“Oh oh st t t top!” she managed as her thighs loudly smacked against mine. I pushed in all the way in and held it there, hugging her body tightly below me and finding her ear in the dark.

“Feel the difference?” I whispered.

“You asshole,” she whimpered, “you have to stop.”

“Didn’t you like that?” I asked.

“I...” she started and then stopped.

I finished her words, “You loved it.”

“Fuck you.”

“My pleasure,” I said as I proceeded to intentionally slide my cock in and out of Anna’s pussy in the dark like I owed it a favor. My long and sensual strokes were slow but rhythmic. I knew our game had ended as I heard her groan out a familiar sound, one of pure ecstasy, and she began to match my deep plunges thrust for thrust with her hips. It was fantastic. This was no simple fuck; this was hot, deep, lubricated intercourse between two experienced sexual beings.

After a few sublime minutes of pitch-black communion with Anna, I eased my twitching cock out of her for the... fourth?... time that night. I turned her around and felt for her face, sucking the inside of her soft mouth into mine. Our bodies came together as we smashed my sloppy cock between us like a sandwich. The heat in the room was unbearable as we both were practically out of our minds with lust.

“My room...” is all I said after painfully pulling us apart.

“Now.” she agreed, pulling me quickly in that direction. I followed her lead in the dark, and we bumped our naked bodies along the wall in a hurry to get there. Once inside, I found the plug to a small string of lights, which washed the room in enough dim light to see the naked girl sprawling across my bed like a seductress.

We squinted at the light, but her eyes were on my body, crawling up and down, a look of hot lust burned onto her face.

“Come here,” she said curling a finger at me.

I crawled over her body, staring into her eyes with the awareness we were lovers once again. For a brief window in time, we let ourselves go to enjoy the familiar fruits of our bodies and minds.

Our lips met again and this time it was gentle, inviting, almost intoxicating as the soft wetness of our mouths settled into a playful erotic dance. Her legs were wide and drew me in with a tractor beam of passion and warmth, of excitement and playfulness; of lust... and love.

I stopped kissing her for a moment and looked deeply into her eyes, she read my thoughts immediately.

“I know that look,” Anna said, running her fingers through my hair. “We just can’t.”

I didn’t answer because I knew she was right. I knew the logic involved. I knew the pain we’d repeatedly felt. I knew the way our personalities worked against us at every turn when we were together.

I - Didn’t - Fucking - Care.

“I know...” I conceded as always, saying the words but feeling the twinge of remorse behind them.

“We’re so good at this,” she said, reaching between her legs and guiding my throbbing ache into her warm intensive care. She hugged me tightly to her chest as I sank it in once again, breathing heavy air into my ear. “Ohhh, Yes, that’s it, you feel so good... mmm.”

I felt her nipples pushing into me as my hips worked the action between us. I wanted to hold back and make it all last forever, but her body was too sensual, too lustful... too perfect.

I started moving faster, making her squeal with delight at my increased vigor. The bed started shifting beneath us as the sounds and smells of sex were broadcast throughout the cozy room.

I was up on my hands again, watching her body take me, her soft tits wobbling on her chest. Her mouth was open and her eyes bore into mine, urging me on. Our frantic sex was gaining steam as her legs hugged me tightly and tried to help me fuck her, like really fuck her with everything I had.

I started to get wild, and words just poured out of my mouth, like we should have known they would.

“Do you like my cock in there, An?” I was in a mental trance and everything felt familiar again, like knowing how much of a turn on her name was. “Do you like a good fuck?” Her head nodded and her eyes were eating mine alive. “Does it make your pussy wet to feel my cock fucking you so hard?”

“Yes,” she softly moaned, “keep fucking me... oh god daddy, fuck me!”

And there it was.

I had all but forgotten, but it came out of her just like that, mere moments before a shocked look spread across her face. Adorable. I slowed for just a second and grinned wickedly into her eyes as they darted with fear.

“You like daddy’s cock, don’t you baby?” I growled at her, just the way she liked it. “You’re so good for your daddy, a good girl with a wet pussy, aren’t you?”

The conflict on her face was apparent, but short lived. Quickly she reached up and pulled me down to her, our bodies frantically fucking again. Her tongue went in my ear and out the end of my juiced-up cock as it pumped into her.

“Oh god daddy, give it to me,” she moaned into my soul, “make love to me, please. I need you. Can you feel how wet you’re making me?”

I was struggling to hang on, it was all too intense. I felt my passion reaching a peak with our most personal and private game playing out after all this time. I had no choice but to settle the hell down...

“Hold on baby,” I said as I slowly pulled out of her against the strain of her legs trying to keep me in place.

“No,” she said, “don’t go!” Still, I pulled away and rolled over, lying next to her. I was breathing heavy and sweating.

“I’m exhausted,” I sigh, “let me get some rest?” I closed my eyes with my arm over my face, knowing my aim to get her on top was immediately received.

Anna climbed over and straddled me, quickly descending her hot pussy over my soaking cock and picking up right where we left off.

“Mmmm, what are you doing hon?” I moaned as she swallowed my cock with her body in the most desperate way possible.

“I need you daddy,” she said as her butt started to bounce her soft pussy up and down the length of me as she lay on top of me, “I have to feel you... inside me... fucking me... daddy,” she whispered in my ear.

With a surge of passion, she sat herself upright, my cock fully seated inside of her. Watching her sitting above me I admired her perky breasts as she stared into my eyes. I reached up and took a handful of each. She looked down at me with a mischievous smirk, and then something else settled onto her face. . .

“Daddy...” she started to say, slowly grinding her pelvis into my pubic bone and swirling my cock around inside of her. No more words came however as she placed her palms flat on my chest and pushed against me, shifting her hips and stirring her insides with my deeply reaching cock. Her rocking became pushing, and her pushing became sliding. Soon she was lying against me again, quickly and frantically fucking my brains out.

Our bodies slapped together as our moans devolved into grunts. I felt Anna’s hot breath in my ear again, and her words this time were some of the most wonderful utterances my soul could ever have dreamed.

“Daddy, oh... this is so good, and... god, you’re so incredible. I love your big cock inside of me, Mmmm. You’re everything to me, and anything you’re not... mmmm... tough shit. Ohhhhhh gggod, keep fucking me daddy… yessss. This has to be, the last time... uh huh, keep going... the last time we, fuck around on other people, okay?”

I barely started to reply.

“Shhhh,” she continued as her pussy slid up and down my deep erection, “…mmmm, let me finish... This is the last time, because from now on, there are no other people Daddy, ahh... that’s right... because, I want to be yours again. I want us to be together, forever this time... ohhhh... you like that, Daddy? It’s okay. Tell me.”

“I fucking love it,” my voice burst out as my cock thrust into her bouncing body. I had hold of her hips and was pulling her back down to me each time she pulled away.

Finally, I slowed our bodies down to an easy pace and looked hard into her eyes. “And I love you, Anna. I really do” I lifted my hands and held her face in them as our bodies slowed. “What the hell have we been doing all this time?” I had to know.

She didn’t answer at first, and just looked into my eyes as we stopped, our souls keeping the sultry flames connecting us alive. Then she told me, and it made perfect sense.

“Making sure.”

Oh, I was sure. I was absolutely sure there wasn’t another person on the planet that could come close to the connection I felt with this human being. I wanted nothing more in that very moment than to follow her to the ends of the world and throw everything I called my own into oblivion.

I was hers. Anna’s... and I had never been happier.

“And you’re sure?” I asked tentatively.

“I’ve never been more sure of anything in my life,” she said, her words falling out between panting breaths. “I love you more right now than I thought was possible.”

I pushed deeply into her body, this time to form a concrete joining of our souls. She pushed back and I instantly felt every other time we had merged together wash over me as if they had all just happened in an instant. We locked together in a quiet, emotional embrace.

Anna’s soft body was an extension of mine in that moment in time. We started to hug tightly in our coupled position, twitching slightly from the emotional and physical reception.

Our bodies started to ignite again, but without any physical movement. It was a strange feeling, like we were fucking, frozen in time.

She looked at me and I felt her pussy start to tremble around my cock. Then it twitched again, and I felt a rumble in my body. Her arms began to shake, and her mouth opened in an expression of deep pleasure. It was so beautiful and enchanting that I felt a wave of passion extend my cock into her further.

Her eyes widened in disbelief, as her legs began to join the chorus. I held on to her tightly and just throbbed inside of her, feeling every pulse of pleasure that was building around it. Her chest began to twitch, and she sucked in a deep breath, clinging to my body and digging her nails into my skin.

“OOOOOOHHHH...” she shuddered with a shaky moan, and I looked up at her face, which she had pushed forward in a grimace of intense concentration, and I knew Anna was about to burst.

The wall of energy that slammed into her body caused every muscle of hers to clench, gripping me tightly beneath her and jerking us both with her sudden heaves. I held on tightly and just let her come around me with everything she had, feeling her pussy convulsing and twitching on my cock, drinking in the waves of pressure and release washing over us.

Without warning the feel of her throbbing contractions and her intense climax caused my cock to swell and vibrate. The feel of her liquid release washing over me and the erotic spectacle of her orgasm was enough to start my own.

“Breed me, daddy…” Anna said.

That was enough to set me off, a wave of thrilling exhilaration rushed through my nervous system, throbbing out a wave of cum deep into her body as my muscles grabbed her tightly. My creamy jets lurched into Anna’s delicious cunt as her inner walls milked my erupting cock of each electric burst. They kept pumping out of me, pulse after pulse, for what seemed like an eternity...

It was immediately the most intense sexual feeling I had ever experienced, and there hadn’t been any movement; only our tight naked connection and our newly ignited passion and love for the other. We lay there panting, both of us with looks of disbelief and sheer wonder on our faces.

“What the hell... was that?” she asked finally, her body sweating and still snugly wrapped around my own.

“The best sex we’ve ever had?” I offered slowly, feeling my cock finally letting go of the firm pressure it had been holding all night.

Her heavy breathing was coming down and she lifted her body up onto her arms to look into my eyes, a satisfied grin and something else across her face.

“By far the best sex we’ve ever had,” she agreed and paused, her gaze drinking in my soul for a moment.

“I think we should give it another go.”

“Really?” I exasperated, unable to actually move my body another inch, “I think I might need the night to recover.”

Anna smiled and rolled her eyes, “Not that dummy... Us.”

There was no question, no hesitation in my mind. Our subconscious minds kept bringing us together over the years for what we finally came to realize. We couldn’t stay apart, for worse or for better...

[doodlesandbooks]

I was inspired by @sham-w0w's sketch of her versions of the avatars and wanted to have my own go XD -please go and check out her lovely art :)

design notes under the cut:

Names:

I chose a name for f!robin that was bird based and had the same number of syllables, and that ended in an N and started with R, hence ‘Ravan’

Male Corrin has their Japanese name: 'Kamui'

Bylee is a pet name that my sister gave her f!byleth when she first played through 3 houses (other options included Byres or Beresu since that was her name in Japanese, but I preferred Bylee.)

I couldn't think of a good name for her so eventually I put the Japanese kanji of their name into google translate. It came up with Chez, so I've gone with it! XD

The name Luear, was a combination of their Japanese name Luere and their English name Alear.

Robin:

I gave both Robins a Validar/aversa skin tone, but gave Ravan the fringe and eye bags that my favourite design of f!robin has. I kept her pigtails though because they’re pretty integral to the characters silhouette. I also gave her a slightly darker shade of hair since in FEwarriors, she has a grey hair tone.

My character customisations of male robin (left) female robin (right)

FE Warriors Anna's momento 1 for hair colour reference

Aversa and validar's portraits for skin tone reference

Corrin:

I love them both so I kept them pretty similar to the usual designs. I did make him a bit younger since his design is based off of his younger option whereas her's is based off of the older option. I also gave him a hoshidan earring because I thought it looked cute and he tends to represent the hoshidan route. I also like to give them lil sharp dragon teef because they deserve it.

My customisation choices for both Corrins

Byleth:

for the byleths i made them both look slightly blue in complexion because of their hearts not really working. Both of them have some pale and some dark hair and part pale part dark eyes. I gave f!byleth more of the paler colouration since I tend to only play her myself on blue lions or azure gleam, so she always has that colour scheme. He also has the darker hair in engage so it seemed fitting to do it that way round. I love them both so I wanted to draw them both pretty close to the original.

Shez:

Shez has a design that I have a love hate relationship with, on the one hand, I appreciate how silly it is, on the other hand, it is ridiculous. However, purple and orange is a solid colour scheme. I really love how they both look in their powered up form, so I have given them elements of that in their base design.

f!Shez's very layered fringe vs un-layered main section of hair really bothers me, so I have given her a shorter hair cut... also freckles because I love freckles and I thought they suited her.

Alear:

I kept both the Alear designs very similar to the original, except for male Alear's eyes, which I've given a darker colour.

In the fell Xenologue, the only time we see his face, Xenologue Alear is in shadow, hence the darker eye colour, I also gave him one of my favourite silly accessories from the DLC - the single earring! XD

[thebibliosphere]

Hi! How are you doing? Sorry to bother you, but i dont know many scottish people and idk who to talk to about this book I found on audible. It's called Imogène, by french author Charles Exbrayat. Do you know him /the book? I've started reading it but I had to pause because, while being sold as a "humorous spy story" I find the protagonist, a "very proudly scottish" woman, to be... an offensive caricature? Like she acts like a fool, honestly. This book contains some interesting points about sexism (it was published in 1959), and ridiculous british habits (such as employees forced to give money for princess anna's birthday or being socially scorned). I'm sure the shared dislike / distrust the protagonist and her british colleagues feel are (were?) realistic. But she is so extra, and the story keeps telling how lonely she is, even after working 20 years in london. She has No friends, most acquitances dont talk to her for various motivations, her bosses hates her ... idk I feel this book is actually mocking scottish people? Or scottish women??? I was SO there for a "strong woman protagonist who gives cutting remarks to her boss or peers", but this looks wrong. Idk. I didnt know whom ask for inputs. Maybe i'm reading too much into it. Feel free to ignore this mega rant. Have a good day!

I think cultural and historical context and time of publication-- which was almost 70 years ago --are important factors to take into consideration when we look at fiction through our current expectations.

I can’t speak to the book as I’ve never read it, but speaking as a Scots woman who worked for an English publishing house for a while, being made to feel alienated by my boss and others due to being Scottish was unfortunately still something going on in 2011.

I’d get lots of “Oh but you sound so eloquent” remarks regarding my thinned-out accent (something I did on purpose to avoid being told to “speak properly” which was also something I heard a lot in school if I ever used my native Scots language instead of “Queen’s English.”) and one time my boss referred to me as “their civilized Scot” to an American author, whose Scottish romance book I was supposed to be fixing the dialogue on.

The phrasing was along the lines of, “Don’t worry, you’ll be able to understand her. Joy is our civilized Scot.”

The author laughed and made another derogatory comment about how they just loved Scottish accents even if it was unintelligible a lot of the time. I kept my mouth shut because I didn't want to lose my first career job.

I kept my mouth shut a lot in that job.

In that regard I could very well empathize with the character being lonely and not engaging with anyone, even after 20 years.

The proud Scottish woman can be a bit of a caricature, but that doesn't necessarily mean it is intended as mocking.

Again, cultural/historical context matters.

I wasn’t alive in 1959, but I know there was a lot of Scottish media about the time that leaned into the stubbornness and pride of Scots women both for humor and to make societal commentary on the fact that women were strong and more independent than they’d ever been following two world two and a lot of men weren’t happy about it and wanted them to go back into their boxes. As a result the mouthy, proud Scots woman became a mockable caricature that turned women into shrill, over proud scolds.

Get back in your box or we’ll make fun of you, basically.

So is this book being mocking, or is it employing popular tropes of the time, knowing that audience will understand what it means and that the female protagonist is being subversive despite what others expect from her?

I can’t say. Again, haven’t read it. It could be utter dogshit and making total fun of my culture. But I do think when looking at older media we need to put our thinking caps on and think, “How would the audience of the time, 1959, have viewed and engaged with this?”

Expecting a “strong female protagonist” as we know it from media today isn’t going to work with media that’s almost 70 years old.

Hell, the “strong woman protagonist” wasn’t even something any piece of media could agree on when I was growing up in the 90s.

Times change. Literary tropes and preferences change. It helps to keep that in mind.

[olderthannetfic]

You recently mentioned that you've been out since your teens. As a person who managed to overlook a shitton of signs and only realized she was bi in her early 20s, I am wondering how you realized you were bi and also how you found out bisexuality exists?

Sorry if the phrasing sounds weird, I only noticed I was bi because I stumbled over the term on tumblr in 2016 and was like "oh, that's possible??" and then my earlier identity crises during my teens due to feeling attracted to multiple genders and being like "I'm crushing on [female person]. Am I lesbian? Nah, I've also felt attracted to [male person]. But I can't be straight either because this attraction feels the exact same. Am I broken?" were suddenly resolved with the realization that bi is also an option and that I'm not broken due to zigzagging between heterosexuality and homosexuality, but rather just bisexual. In retrospect, it's absolutely ridiculous that it took me so long, considering that as a kid I had crushes on Anna and Carter and Doctor from Harvest Moon: Friends of Mineral Town, and Vitani from Lion King 2, and back in primary school, I used to go to the kids' section in the library and look at the first pages of a sci-fi comic which had one or two women get out of a lab or space station thingy and go bathe in the nude in the first few pages. I don't remember what it was called or what it was about, but tbh I'd love to find it and actually read it properly this time lol.

--

Horniness. The hornier you are, the easier it is to notice.

But also... well...

The 80s were all about combating the AIDS crisis and trying to get basic recognition of the humanity of gay people (at least in the US circles I was familiar with). The 90s saw the rise of a much more organized bi rights movement.

And then we backslid.

In the 2000s and 2010s, interest in bisexuality as a distinct thing fell off a cliff as far as I can tell. The "hey, it's not just cis gays and lesbians" energy moved first to trans topics and then to asexuality but without bisexuality joining the stodgy old guard.

The 90s were different. I was hitting my teens just as Anything That Moves hit its stride. I bought that shit at the bookstore. Yeah, this was the Bay Area, but they carried it at all the regular bookstores, not just the gay ones.

On Usenet where I spent a lot of my tween years, one of the big groups was soc.bi. I even spotted them having an in-person meetup in a restaurant in Berkeley where I happened to be having dinner with my parents. I didn't go say hi because I was like 14.

My big eureka moment, though, was on alt.tv.x-files when two groups were having a satirical argument about who enjoyed The X-Files more: people who got to lust over David Duchovny or people who got to lust over Gillian Anderson. Someone showed up and was like "Hah! I get to enjoy it twice as much as all of you! I'm bi!"

I was like "That's a thing????" I'd grown up with very liberal parents and lesbian neighbors, but like a lot of boomers, my mom was pro-gay and deeply clueless about all other queerness.

--

So the answer is unsupervised internet access in an age with no algorithms plus things like bisexual magazines actually existing.

RIP Anything That Moves.

[fiendishartist2]

im not fucking around anymore. here's the full "Paul is Care" essay i've been working on:

“Alright. So there's uh, nothing out here, as far as I've seen. But actually, I think there is something out here. I just haven't seen it yet.”

In Petscop, the story is told between the lines. When you feel like you have a grasp on it, a single colour or date throws off everything you’ve built up. That’s why I like to look at Petscop in another way; not as a series of events, but an exploration of a single character: Paul.

Some people like to map everything out in a single timeline; when did Care go missing, when did the family get the game, when did Lina and Mike die. I think that every interpretation of Petscop has its own value, because Petscop means something different to everyone who watches it. But, when I look at Petscop, I don’t just see a series of events wrapped up in the mystery of Care’s disappearance. I see a video game used as a device to explore and understand the connection between the past and the present. I see the ways in which Paul Leskowitz is Carrie Mark.

I know that to some that notion might seem crazy; the broader discussion of Petscop is different to the niche ones held by crazy people in the tags of a Tumblr post . Obviously, this theory is personally significant and I hold it very near and dear to my heart. But, I want to share this theory in a way that makes sense to the general audience of Petscop because I genuinely believe you guys are missing out! So, keep an open mind and enter my Petscop mind-palace…

“...were signs along the way. Um, that I ignored. Because it would have been a completely ridiculous idea to me. Um. But when I found my room, it made, uh, well, I was shocked at first, but it made sense, especially considering where I found the game in the first place, um, that it would be tied, in some way, to me through you. Um. And I'm trying to think, when was the last time I saw any of you at all? It had to have been in like, 1999. I was a kid, I was a small kid. Tiny kid. Um. And after that, just, you know. But, it would make sense in the timeline.” (Petscop 11)

A lot of Petscop theories surround the actual textual proof found in the videos, so that’s where I’ll start. There’s many instances where Paul makes the connection between himself and Care, but one moment continues to stick with me. In Petscop 11, Paul finally enters the house and takes a look around. He’s on the phone with someone, presumably Belle. Paul goes up to the calendars and starts talking about Care, “Yeah, on that topic... I don't remember meeting this girl at all. Um, I don't remember knowing her at any point (…) Um, and I remember you saying that we were, that we, we are, um, exactly the same age.” (Petscop 11). He points out that he and Care share the same birthday, down to the year. We get further confirmation of this in Petscop 14, when Paul’s conversation with Jill that he had on his own birthday is superimposed onto Care’s. The next part though, is what really gets the theory started, “I do agree there's a resemblance. Um. Very strong resemblance between us.” (Petscop 11).

Faces are incredibly important in Petscop. Marvin thought Care and Mike could be rebirthed into Lina because they had similar features, and Care had to be given Mike’s eyebrows specifically to change her room. So, for Paul and Care to have such similar facial features that someone else pointed out the resemblance is significant.

They also happen to share the name “Leskowitz”, which is both Anna and Lina’s last name. We know this because his Reddit account is “p_leskowitz”.

If he’s a Leskowitz, then that explains his complicated feelings towards “the family”. “The family” is a foreboding presence throughout Petscop. Their meddling isn’t outright malicious, but even Paul admits that he’s intimidated by them. And it makes sense, as “the family” (comprised of Anna and Jill) each have a major role in the core mystery of Petscop. Anna is the mother of Care and the wife of Marvin, while Jill is Marvin’s sister and the mother of both Rainer and Mike. To be a Leskowitz, Paul would need to be blood related to Anna or Lina in some way. Paul shows that he has this relation to the family in Petscop 22, when he’s talking to Belle about finding the windmill, “And, I don't th- and you don't have to worry about it, right, 'cause... 'cause you aren't, you aren't family, so you wouldn't... have a room, that's the thing.” (Petscop 22). In this context, Paul is asking Belle whether Jill has contacted her. When he tells her she doesn’t have a room, this is in reference to the Child Library explored in Petscop 3 and 7. This means that in order to be part of the Leskowitz-Mark family (and in our case, related to Care), you have to have a room in the Child Library, something both Paul and Care possess.

Paul being related to the family is also supported by his casual mention of meeting Rainer as a child, “‘Rainer’... I saw him at a birthday party once. All the older kids were down in the basement playing video games, to hide from everyone. He was down there, too. He was older than the rest of them, though.” (Petscop 11), and his confusion of not knowing Care, with the implication that if she was real, he would have met her through the family.

A rarely discussed aspect of Paul’s character is that he can’t tell his left from his right. When he’s doing the disc puzzle in Anna and Marvin’s room is Petscop 11, “Um, we can see what the room looks like in that recording, um, on the uh, right? ... Left? Left? Right ... side.” (Petscop 14) and before he even enters the house, “And, I mean, I still get confused about that. Because, I mean, well, I know it's always the top, but, um, I still have to think. I have to think.” (Petscop 11), we can clearly see that he has trouble with directions. In a similar fashion, Care is described as “dizzy”, most notably in the end credits of Petscop. She is also described as blind by Rainer in Petscop 17, “You were blind. At some point, your movements stopped making sense.” (Petscop 17). In the counsellor’s office, the counsellor says to Paul, “Are you right handed, or left handed? You don't know? Really?” (Petscop 22). I’ll get more into it later, but this sequence is presumably a real conversation that the game is recreating. If this scene is taken from Care’s real childhood, then it confirms that she also had problems with her lefts and rights.

Now, this is the base level of the theory. It’s easy to figure out that Paul is a Leskowitz, he literally calls them “the family”. And while I think the bits about faces and birthdays and directions are significant to this theory, I wanted to get all of the textual evidence out of the way so that I could get into the fun part of this essay: the subtext.

”Some things you can't rewrite.” (Petscop 14)

Petscop is nothing if not a collection of symbols and metaphors. Ask me what Petscop is all about on any given day and there’s a non-zero chance I will start explaining why the car is orange. While it is necessary to analyse Petscop as a real series of events, I think that another approach can be taken; what if we analysed Petscop as a series of events that are happening to Paul specifically? That the game is creating meaning by placing Paul specifically in these snippets of the past. By looking at each moment as “Why did the game make Paul do this?” instead of “What is happening in the game?”, we can see everything through a new lens.

First, I want to discuss colour. Colour plays a huge role in Petscop; almost every character is assigned their own colour. This is most often used to denote who is speaking in text, but it’s also used for other things like the tool. You are probably aware that Care’s colour is yellow, as all of her text is yellow. What you might not know is that Paul’s colour is red. Paul has exactly one instance in all of Petscop where he has coloured text and that is in Petscop 22, when he gives the counsellor his name. The calendars in the house are also colour coded, as the one showing 2017 is red.

One of my favourite moments in all of Petscop uses colour in a way that supports this theory perfectly. When Paul takes Care out of the rebirthing machine, she has been transformed into an Easter egg. A red and yellow striped Easter egg. I will get into this egg later on, but for now, I want to point out how Paul and Care’s colours have been used here. Of course, it’s significant just that they've been put together, but it's more than that. Care’s final form, the egg she has been placed in to keep her safe from all of the trauma she has suffered, that she will spend the rest of the series in, is painted a combination of her and Paul’s colours. In the same sequence, when Paul is playing the Needles Piano for Care B, the “wrong” notes he plays to turn her into the Easter Egg are all red. There’s a joke about eggs and transness in here somewhere.

Right after Care’s rebirth into the egg, Paul places her in the locker with the purple egg and the “new life” letter. If we abide by the established colour theory, this second egg would be Belle’s/Tiara’s egg. By putting them together, alongside the letter, it symbolises Care and Belle’s transfer to Lina’s care; this can also be supported by the ending of Petscop. In the final scene of the soundtrack, Belle recounts when she and Paul were adopted, “There is Boss waiting for her son. Pall do you remember being born. Smuggled away driving to your new house. Boss in driver seat me in back.” (Petscop Soundtrack). “Do you remember being born” is a question posed over and over again throughout Petscop. It’s meant to be a reference to rebirthing, but here it’s Paul being asked if he remembers being born, not Care; you can also connect this to the “new life” letter, making it apparent Belle is asking if he remembers when he was given his “new life” with her and “Boss”. There’s also the implication of the wording “smuggled away”, implying that there was something stopping Paul from being taken to his new home. Paul and Care’s final scenes parallel each other; Care is placed with Belle’s/Tiara’s egg with the “new life” letter, while Paul is taken back to “Boss” by Belle. Care and Paul are both asked if they “remember being born”.

Another, smaller piece of colour theory in Petscop comes from the board games in the counsellor’s office. The board game “Accident” features red and yellow puzzle pieces that fit together, but are broken apart. Remember that Care’s colour is yellow, so assume that she symbolises the yellow piece; Paul’s colour is red, so assume that he symbolises the red piece. The red piece is bigger and fits into the smaller yellow piece, like it’s missing the beginning of it. The yellow piece comes before the red piece, as if it adds context to the red piece. When we think of this in terms of Care and Paul, we can see that Care is the “missing piece” of Paul; the small part of his past that adds the context that completes him. Paul’s piece is bigger because he’s been Paul for so much longer (if we interpret the counsellor’s office as a real event the way it is shown, then that could be the moment he changed. Or, if we consider Care’s rebirth into the egg as the moment Care turned into Paul, then that would be the moment instead), meanwhile Care’s piece is small because she was only a small part of his life.

Taking colour into account, we can get into the meat of the symbolism in Petscop. When we view the events of Petscop through our new lens, many things become significant. Paul is placed in the role of Care many times throughout the series; on Care’s birthday, in the counsellor's office, and in Rainer’s “you are Carrie Mark” monologue.

During the “strange situation” birthday scene, Paul carries around a yellow balloon, symbolising that he is standing in for Care. This is further cemented by Anna’s dialogue addressing Paul as if he is Care on the day she came home, “You made it. Happy birthday! (...) Why are you covering your face? (...) Of course I recognize you. Those eyes. That nose. That’s still you.” (Petscop 14).

This next dialogue from Anna is particularly interesting to me; she doesn’t just tell Paul that she’s happy Care is home safe or ask him where she’s been, but instead she says this, “I sure hope you’ve realised by now. It doesn’t matter how long you’ve been gone. It doesn’t matter how much you’ve changed. You aren’t lost. Stop wandering and come home.” (Petscop 14). When we talk about Petscop, we have the urge to deny any supernatural involvement in the story. Whether through AI or predictive programming or alternate timelines, we want Petscop to be plausible. Understandable. Easy to digest. But, we often forget that Paul poses the question of a literal “ghost in the machine” in the first few episodes. I want to consider this quote– Anna talking to her child who has been “lost” for many years– as an act of this ghost. The game is talking back to Paul, telling him that no matter how much he has changed, he still has the same eyes, the same nose that made him Carrie Mark. And we know how important eyes and noses are in Petscop. Also as a side note, consider how Anna didn’t specify eyebrows; we know that Care’s lack of eyebrows is in some way due to Marvin, but when she tells Paul she recognises his eyes and nose, she doesn’t add on eyebrows. Paul said it himself in Petscop 7, “Um, and why am I doing that? Well, because eyebrows seem to be important.” (Petscop 7). I like to think that she couldn’t have said that Paul has the same eyebrows because, since Marvin isn’t in the picture anymore, he wouldn’t have any reason to pluck them.

Another scene that mixes up Paul and Care is the counsellor's office. When Paul finally enters the “girl wall” in Petscop 22, he is placed into a school’s counsellor’s office. Again, they talk to Paul as if he is Care, apologising for taking him out of class and saying he needs to “catch up”, implying that he’s missed a significant amount of school. As they start to play Graverobber (Jesus Christ, Rainer), the counsellor is confused about Paul’s name; they ask him if they have the wrong name written down, as his save file is currently “Strange Situation” and when they called out the name on file, Paul didn’t respond. Now, the connection here is a little more nuanced, but it still comes to a conclusion that I think greatly supports the theory. “Strange situation” is in reference to the Mary Ainsworth Strange Situation Experiment, a test in which an infant is deliberately separated from their mother to test their level of attachment. This is a very base level understanding of this concept, but when applied to this specific scene, it becomes apparent that this “strange situation” is another reference to Care. Care was separated from her mother for about half a year, only returning during the birthday party scene; the counsellor’s scene was accessible once Paul started using the “Strange Situation” file. Care stopped recognising the name she used before the seperation, considering herself to be “Strange Situation” instead. She has literally stopped recognising the name Care, and picks out her own name (which in the game Paul sets to his own).

Also consider the implication of the “girl wall”. At first, it’s an absurd joke, meant to lighten the mood using the same roundabout humour the rest of the series has. But, the counsellor asking if they have the wrong name, listing Paul as “Strange Situation” instead of his name, combined with the fact that when Paul is placed in front of the girl wall, he can’t walk away from it, it becomes a bit of an analogy; The game keeps forcefully showing Paul the word “GiRL” over and over and when he finally enters the “girl-world” as Strange Situation, he is called the wrong name and once again placed in Care’s shoes.

Let’s revisit the “ghost in the machine” idea. In Petscop 17, we are shown a past recording of Petscop; we never find out who was playing at this time, but it’s easy to assume Paul is the one watching the recording. The footage is less interesting than the dialogue, but it is notable that it’s a recording of the player running backwards in a very deliberate pattern. The actually relevant part of this sequence is Rainer’s monologue; in particular, the way he frames it, “You are a girl named Carrie Mark, and you were born on November 12th, 1992. You have a mommy named Anna, a daddy named Marvin, an auntie named Jill, an uncle named Thomas, a cousin named Daniel, ......I know what you must be thinking. Have these statements always been true? Or have I cursed you? Is there such a thing? A curse that changes your past?” (Petscop 17). There’s something about the forcefulness of this dialogue, “You are Carrie Mark,” as if Rainer is trying to make it so just by saying it. The inclusion of the birthday is also notable; we have been shown time and time again that Paul and Care share a birthday, and that this is an important part of both of their characters. So, when Rainer asks if these statements have always been true, or if it’s “a curse that changes your past”, we’re meant to interpret it as such: some of the statements are true, but the “you” being addressed is not currently “a girl named Carrie Mark”. Rainer casts a spell to make the player retrace their steps and although he might not be playing, the use of the word “you” and present tense language makes the statement pointed towards Paul. There’s something to be said about Rainer’s position in all of this; he isn’t the only tangible “ghost” in Petscop (Marvin and Tiara fit Paul’s definition established in Petscop 6), but he’s the only one to be fully dead. It truly feels, in this moment, like Petscop– like Rainer– is talking directly to Paul. The “curse that changes your past” is the part that ties it all together. This past that Paul doesn’t fully remember, where Anna and Marvin have a daughter named Care, where someone in his family went missing for months– by learning about this through the game, Rainer is essentially changing Paul’s version of the past. Your memory and physical evidence are all you have of the past; when your memory tells you one thing, but physical evidence tells you another, what version of your past is true?

“You’re the Newmaker. You can turn Care NLM into Care A, and close the loop.” (Petscop 9)

Finally, I want to explain why this theory is supportive of the themes of Petscop. Of course, there’s the obvious link between rebirth and the change from Care to Paul. But, there’s also themes of blood family versus chosen family, breaking the cycle of abuse, and of healing from your past. I want to provide an explanation of each of these themes and how the “Paul is Care” theory fits into them.

Let’s begin with the family point, since I already expanded on the family’s role in Petscop earlier. There’s a story behind the scenes in this series; the conflict between the chosen family versus the blood family. Anna and Jill against Belle and Lina. Anna and Jill are restrictive– they take over the channel and block certain things from the audience. Paul admits that he’s intimidated by them, and he’s concerned when he thinks Jill could be in contact with Belle. When we get the only dialogue from Jill, Paul is hostile and aggressive with her, something we don’t see from him otherwise. Alternately, Anna comes off as dismissive in most of her dialogue; when Care shows up at the birthday party, Anna treats her like no time has passed, like they haven’t been searching for her for months. We don’t get direct contact between Anna and Paul (except for a phone call in Petscop 11 that you could interpret as being with Anna), but the way she talks to the player through Care during the birthday party is still dismissive, “I sure hope you’ve realised by now. It doesn’t matter how long you’ve been gone. It doesn’t matter how much you’ve changed. You aren’t lost. Stop wandering and come home.” (Petscop 14). There’s a level of distance between Paul and the family, which is evident from the name alone; Paul identifies himself as part of the family, but he still calls them “the family” as opposed to “my family”. When you pair that with the fact that he calls them all by their first names instead of any term of endearment (like how Rainer calls her “Auntie Jill” in his spell), it paints a clear picture: Paul does not want to be part of this family.

In direct contrast, Belle is shown a significant amount of affection from Paul. Not only is he on the phone with her for a good handful of the episodes, but Belle also has a familial connection to Paul. In Petscop 2, Paul is talking to Belle and he says “When you come home next month, and uh, hopefully you're feeling a little more enthusiastic about that now, we can investigate this together, and maybe you'll find stuff that I can't find here.” (Petscop 2). I think the casual use of the word ‘home’ to describe where Belle is staying implies a certain closeness, maybe even that they live in the same household. That’s not the part of this line that is important to me, however. Take a look at Belle’s final speech at the end of Petscop; Belle says “I could not wait too be your friend,” and Paul responds, “Family”, to which Belle says, “We can investigate this together.” (Petscop Soundtrack). After distancing himself from the family, as well as directly telling her she’s not part of the family (following it up with “Uhh... I didn't- I didn't mean it that way,” (Petscop 22), implying they have a similar connection that she’s defending), Paul calls Belle family. She states that they’re friends and Paul corrects her by telling her that they’re not just friends, but family. The most gut wrenching part of this dialogue is the use of ‘we can investigate this together’. It’s like a ward, a promise that Belle is making to Paul. He doesn’t have to go through this alone, she’s promising to be there for him. She’s going to investigate this with him, like he asked her to in the second episode. Paul doesn’t call his blood relatives family, but he tells Belle that they are his family; her and the “Boss”.

How does this connect to Care? It’s not hard evidence, but when you take this theme of family into account, it makes more sense for Paul to have a strained relationship with the family if we apply Care’s story to him. Think about it; Paul was ‘smuggled away driving too [his] new house’ and he hasn’t seen the family since he was a child, and Care’s egg was (metaphorically) placed with Belle’s and the New Life Letter when she would have been around 5, since that’s the age she was when she was kidnapped. Care went through an extremely traumatic event in a toxic environment– why wouldn’t someone step in and take her out of that family? To me, this theory extends the same closure Paul gets at the end of Petscop to Care; it tells us that even after everything she went through, she finds people who love and take care of her.

Abuse is a huge focus in Petscop, both as a plot point and a major theme. Rainer’s main motivation is to expose Marvin’s abuse of both Mike and Care to the family– whether or not that’s successful is not important. Because years after Rainer’s attempt, Paul is back doing the exact same; although, his playthrough of Petscop is less of an expose and more of an attempt at solving the mystery. Now, I think it’s a little pedantic, but in this context, I think the “cycle of abuse” in Petscop refers less to a generational cycle, but a continuous cycle that happens every time Petscop is played. Care is stuck in this version of the past that Rainer has created, forced to live through it as many years as Petscop is left on. Paul doesn’t continue this cycle though; as far as we know, Paul is the only person to reach the good ending of the game, where he’s rebirthed Care into the egg and reconnected with Belle and ‘Boss’. Paul is the only person who could understand what Care needed, because it’s exactly what he needed.

Care’s trauma is replayed for us throughout Petscop. Every knowable aspect of it is shown, leaving behind a raw feeling; like somehow, Paul and Rainer have made a spectacle of her abuse. But, I don’t think that’s entirely true. Rainer, although he is bitter and vengeful, is ultimately the person who finds the truth about Care and Mike and (if we are to believe him) is also the one who found Care at the school. In the beginning, it’s obvious that Paul is playing the game to see the mystery and is slowly engulfed by it throughout the rest of the series. When the game tells him that, “Marvin picks up tool hurts me when playstation on,” (Petscop 3), Paul proceeds anyway. The same happens when Care is caught in her room; Paul sees what is obviously a child being kidnapped and continues to solve the puzzle anyway. He picks the flower, catching Care NLM, and leads Marvin to the house. Paul follows through on everything he can to ‘solve’ the mystery of Carrie Mark, but in the end, he defies what the game has told him to do and saves Care. He does what Rainer couldn’t do: he breaks the cycle of abuse in the Mark-Leskowitz family. It’s kind of poetic, the idea that the person Care grew to be is the same person who confronts and lays to rest her trauma. The fact that playing his own theme would be the key to changing Care into the egg (a symbol of birth and potential) is beautiful.

The last thing I want to talk about is the theme of healing. This concept is more nebulous; we don’t see much of Paul post-Petscop, but the final scene does always leave me feeling hopeful for him. I think the reconnection with Belle and ‘Boss’, alongside the reassurance that, “[they] can investigate this together,” shows that Paul is out of the mindset and environment Petscop put him in. I’ve always thought that throughout Petscop, we see a deterioration of Paul; in the beginning, he’s intrigued and confused, but we see him become more and more disturbed, irritable, and frustrated towards the end. This is first evident with the CD puzzle in the house, where Paul is so out of his depth and confused that he stops acting with the same calm rationality shown throughout the earlier episodes. Then, when Paul is messing about with the demo recordings, he stops speaking in the videos entirely. When Paul sees the final blacked out object, which are coordinates to the real life windmill, he is the most stuttery we’ve ever seen, “Hm. Y- y- yep, yep. Yep... yep. N- we would- we would have to find out how big... like, we'd have to find out how big a tile is..? One of the tiles..? Like, if we could- if we could figure out how big... one tile is, in... u- in, umm... Like, feet. Or... Uhh, yeah. Meters.” (Petscop 22). He’s frazzled and excited and a little bit scared, evidenced by how he talks about the family, “They didn't... I don't like talking to them. They intimidate me…” (Petscop 22). All of this changes by the end; Paul is no longer stuck playing the game and he’s free to return to the people who love him most. This freedom is summed up in a single image: the final one we see in Petscop. Paul’s chair is empty and the blue sky beyond the desk is brimming with hope.

All this to say, Paul choosing Belle and ‘Boss’ over the game as well as saving Care by doing what’s best for her instead of finishing the final puzzle, alongside his final scene where he is welcomed home by his real family, shows us an interpretation of Petscop that paints it not as a tragedy, but a story of chosen family, breaking the cycle of abuse, and healing trauma through connection.

Thank you so much for hearing me out.

Bye-bye!

[husbandhoshi]

LILY HI ITS ME STAR!!! HOW ARE YOU I LOVE U AND WISH U ALL THE BEST MUAH MUAH!! also: perhaps smth a little naughty at 11:36 PM with lab partner!wonwoo 👀👀

tags: college!au, inexperienced!wonwoo x f!reader, nerd!wonwoo, experienced!yn, oral (m!receiving)

[11:36]

wonwoo has never liked chemistry.

the periodic table looks like a colorful placemat and a titration might as well be a long winded recipe for a terrible cocktail. (although the ones at the delta tau delta chemistry themed party were good. they served them in little beakers, and wonwoo thought those were quite cute. that was also the party where he met you.)

speaking of you—unlike chemistry, wonwoo does, however, like you a great deal.

which makes chemistry much more tolerable because you are his lab partner.

on the first day of lab, when they had asked the class to pair up, you walked over to him, and wonwoo almost melted right into the ground.

"you're the only one here i know," you whispered, waiting for him to lean down to your height. he did, and you smelled like cherries. "we talked at the delt party. wonwoo, right?"

"yes, i'm wonwoo," he had said, words tripping and tumbling off of his tongue like he was learning to speak for the first time.

it was no better at the party, except he was drunk and you were drunker, and you had made the grave mistake of asking him what classes he was taking. two mike's hard lemonades and a battery acid vodka shot later, his dumb ass was still talking about emily dickinson, and you, somehow, were standing there in those mile-high heels, listening as if he was the most interesting guy at the party.

i think she's totally into you, mingyu had said, in that loud, spitty cadence he has when he's 90% beer.

don't be ridiculous.

but then you had asked wonwoo to walk you to your dorm, and you took the long way, winding right through campus.

he doesn't dream often, but he thinks the one he had that night was red and smelled like your lip gloss.

now, he thanks god for the miracle that is you in an oversized hoodie and shorts in his room past sundown.

granted, you're there to work on the last lab report of the term, and he had seen you just two nights ago at the kappa party, but wonwoo thinks he likes this version of you best. (that night, you had tried to break in your new heels. he ended up holding onto them, and you ended up holding onto him on the drunken stumble home. whether it was for support or for something else, wonwoo doesn't know, but he wishes he wore something different than the ratty polo from the back of his closet.)

"thanks for all your help," you say, closing your lab notebook. "i don't know how you're so good at all of this."

"i'm not," he laughs. he hands you your pencil case with the sailor moon charm, the one you were so proud to show him when he mentioned he watched anime. "it was all you."

you wave him off and bend down to put your things in your bag.

wonwoo tries his best to avert his eyes. he really does.

it's a valiant effort. there's a book out of order on his shelf (anna karenina, tolstoy). he really should have put that gundam figure away before you came over.

and your ass is perfect, but that doesn't really surprise him because he doesn't think there is a single thing wrong with you.

"you know," you start, still rifling around in your bag. "i heard something real interesting from mingyu the other day."

"hm?"

wonwoo changes the backlight color of his keyboard. it does not make him calmer. instead he feels all the peely leather on his gaming chair poke through his sweats and he tries not to think about the little birthmark you have on the back of your thigh.

"he told me that..." you stand straight and turn to face him. there's a fresh coat of gloss on your lips, like a magic trick. "you have a crush on me."

wonwoo doesn't know what to say. he likes to think before he speaks but now you're walking towards him and thinking isn't really an option anymore.

"right?"

"um."

not good. he didn't think he was that obvious but he's no liar.

"fine, i'll start." you're standing right in front of him now, and he thinks the gulp he takes is audible. "i like you."

he watches your lips form around the words, glittery and confident, and if he wasn't doomed before, he certainly is now.

his near perfect gpa is doing jack shit to help him understand why someone like you, gorgeous and funny and smart and popular, would ever take a second look at the gangly boy in the glasses.

but you are—in fact, you're staring with an intensity that makes him afraid you can actually see right through all the clothes he's got on.

"i—" come on, wonwoo thinks. they're the words he wanted to tell you outside your dorm building three weeks ago when you said you didn't know anyone quite like him. "i like you too. a lot."

"good."

the first thing he learns is that you're forward, and he likes that.

the second thing he learns is that your lip gloss tastes like cherry.

your mouth is hot and soft on his. he thinks he died and went to heaven, and then you're kissing him again, catching his bottom lip between your teeth so he whines into your mouth.

the last time he tried kissing was during senior prom. his date stood on her tiptoes and he accidentally bumped his nose into hers and missed her mouth and the whole thing was a disaster.

and yet now, wonwoo feels like he's melted right into your hands. you lead and his body just knows how to follow.

"you're shy, huh?" you murmur, pulling back to look at him. "that's so cute."

he doesn't quite know what he looks like but his glasses are slipping down his nose and he feels the menthol sting of your lips all over his. there has never been this much blood in his cheeks but that doesn't quite make sense to him because he feels all of it going straight to his dick.

"you're perfect," is what the primordial ooze in wonwoo's brain manages to put together.

you kiss him again, and when he remembers to relax his lips enough, you're slipping your tongue in and letting him suck, and you moan.

wonwoo swears he could have blown his load right there and then—when it came to you, it really didn't take much, and now he's wondering what your skin tastes like, craving the cherry of your cunt.

your hand on his chest, sharp nails and glittery rings, trails down nice and slow. it feels like he's on fire. it's a wonderful distraction from the sensation of your teeth on the pretty, taut skin over his collarbone, but then you're biting and licking and he feels his balls get so tight and heavy in his pants he might just cry.

and then your hand comes to rest on his lap, right over his hardness, and wonwoo's about to protest—no, no, sorry, i don't mean to have a boner! i've never been kissed like that before in my life!—until you drop to your knees, right in between his parted thighs.

"has anyone ever touched you like this?" you say, voice low, dizzying. "anyone ever made you feel good?"

he shakes his head no, a new, sudden wave of desire climbing his bones.

mussed hair and swollen lips, you look more beautiful than anyone wonwoo's ever seen in his entire life. he doesn't know what he did in a past life to earn this but he must have saved the world.

"p-please," he says, but it's somewhere between a moan and a gasp because you're palming him through his sweats, the sensation foreign, thrilling.

"patience," you tease, and he would be morbidly embarrassed at the spot of precum on his pants if you weren't already thumbing at it yourself.

once you take his cock out of his sweats, he knows he's losing whatever battle he was fighting. he sees how your hand looks so little around it, and it's his nth struggle to make sure he doesn't just cum in your face. maybe another day, if he's so lucky.

"i-i might cum really fast," he confesses, because he doesn't know how to really say he's never gotten a blowjob before.

"good," you answer. unlike him, somehow you always know exactly what to say.

the third thing wonwoo learns that day is that he's fully, wholly, entirely obsessed with your mouth. with your slick bottom lip, with your tongue, and now with the way he sees your gloss-smeared mouth wrap taut around his cockhead.

wonwoo can never return to watching porn again. there is simply no one quite like you.

"f-fuck," he pants, the feeling overtaking him all at once. "feels so good, mouth's so good—"

one look at your eyes, big and watery and good for him, and he feels his cock twitch in your mouth. and then you start moving; you take him all the way to the base and then some. he feels your tiny little throat close around him, and the groan he lets out is nothing short of pornographic. he never thought he was that big, but seeing your eyes well up and your mascara get all dewy as you gag around him is doing something crazy to his brain.

it doesn't take long for you to fall into an easy rhythm. you're figuring him out so fast, and that would scare him if it didn't feel so good. your tongue's on his veins, the underside of his cockhead, and he's already gripping the armrests of his chair with white knuckles.

you sink down again and swallow around his length, let your throat do all the work, and wonwoo throws his head back, chest heaving. his eyes flutter shut, and the fluorescent ceiling light phases in and out of vision as you give him what could possibly be the best head you've ever given someone in your whole life.

"gonna cum s-soon," wonwoo manages. "you're so fucking hot."

it's either a moan or a whimper that comes out of you when he says that, and he thanks his lucky stars he has the wherewithal to put that information in his back pocket. he doesn't know when or how but his plan is to return the favor to you in full. and if that involves a copious amount of praise, he's all the better prepared because he has no shortage of nice things to say about you.

you take him once, twice to the base and wonwoo feels all the heat in his balls and his belly and then he's cumming, more and harder than he ever thought possible. he almost thinks it's like a piece of his soul was taken from him.

"d-don't have to swallow," he says, but you do, every last fucking drop until it's dribbling from your perfect mouth, and wonwoo is now fully convinced you are a real life goddess.

i'm an addict in the making, he thinks, but then you smile at him with those eyes, and he doesn't think that's such a bad thing.

he searches for the right words to say, something cool, experienced. it's a constant effort to be that guy for you because he's still not really sure why any of this happened.

"stop thinking so hard," you say, coughing once, then wiping your mouth with the back of your hand. "i can see your wheels turning."

how you can read him so easily is beyond him. he wonders if you knew he was in love with you the second he laid eyes on you at the delta tau party.

where are my manners, wonwoo then remembers, and the post-nut clarity possesses him to brush the hair out of your eyes and help you up from your position on the ground.

"i like you. i don't care how experienced you are."

he hears you, and he believes you. instead of arguing, he cups your tear-streaked face in his hands and uses his thumbs to wipe your cheeks.

"plus, i think i'm a pretty good teacher."

you smile, and wonwoo has the confidence to kiss you back, for real this time.

[edwinspaynes]

what do you think the tlh characters would dress up as for halloween

I think that Matthew goes one of two ways. There's the "dress up as Dorian Gray every year" route, which amuses me. But I think it's unlikely considering that he'd want to show off all kinds of avant-garde outfits like the Puck costume that we see in Chain of Thorns. (One of my favourite things in the book, btw - it was really fitting for him. Good job to Cassie on that one.) I like to think that he chooses characters from all sorts of theatrical performances, like Puck. Maybe a character like Mercutio or Antonio would be fun! I also think that Volpone from Marlowe's play would be an endlessly excellent choice for him, so I am going to go with that out of personal desire.

Speaking of self-indulgence, Thomas and Alastair as Charles and Edwin. PLEASE. I want to see Thomas with a massive cricket bat and Alastair in the little knickerbockers. But barring that, especially because we're in the Edwardian era and DBDA unfortunately did not exist, I'd like to see them go as Frankenstein and his monster. I think Thomas would find it fun rather than insulting if it was Alastair doing it, and Alastair would look so good in a lab coat that Thomas couldn't complain. Plus, he'd get to paint his face green and sneak up on James and Matthew, which would be an eternal plus.

James and Cordelia are connoisseurs of couples' costumes and you'll NEVER convince me otherwise. Instead of going as characters, though, I like to imagine them going as utterly ridiculous things. Cordelia dresses up as Cortana one year and James covers himself in red paint and she charges him in the (soft) costume. Once, they dress up as two halves of a massive dragon, and Will and Tessa laugh at James realizing his Jonathan-Shadowhunter-Slaying-the-Dragon dreams. Maybe that one's this year. Yup, it's that one.

Ari and Anna don't get dressed up in costume, but they both dress to rise to the occasion. It's the chance for them to wear as ostentatious of clothes as possible and completely dress to the nines. Also, Anna canonically matches bits of her clothes to Ari's, so... that. They wear these grand costumes at a themed party that they host annually for all of their friends and acquaintances, and once their child is old enough to join in, they want nothing more than to dress their best, too.

I don't think Grace would very much like Halloween - I think it would bring back a lot of bad memories for her since she's essentially a gothic heroine. I don't think she'd dress up for a good long while. But I think that as she gets older and many years go by, she eventually finds herself leaning into the gothic heroine thing. She's an Estella. It's fun to dress like one eventually. But not yet.

If Kit were alive, she'd be fine with dressing up because New Memories. They would couple-cosplay as the Curies. Also as different chemicals that combine to create a reaction. They have little molecule suits and everything.

[whoiwanttoday]

Last night, Joe Bob Briggs showed Cemetery Man, a movie I had seen many times before because it was one of those obscure cult classics here in the states, the kind that a certain type of nerd gravitates to and it means when I worked at a record store a guy there LOVED this movie. Like maybe his favorite movie. I think it's sorta fun but a mess and while it has the same issue as a lot of Italian genre work it somehow works better then a lot of them, so I like it but don't love it. I think I first saw this around 2000 and I had preconceived notions as someone who had seen many an Italian movie from the 70's. Which is they were painfully glamorous and about people who lived lives that felt strikingly sophisticated and cosmopolitan and were full of the most beautiful women in the world. They also didn't make sense, were frustrating in their lack of plot, and the acting wasn't great and the dubbing was ridiculous. All most all of those things are what most people think about these movies and for some people it's why they are great and for others, like me, it's why they are frustrating. A lot of it is the nature of the Italian film industry (RIP, it barely exists now whereas once upon a time it was one of the most important centers of film in the world). It made it's money by mastering dubbing and most Italian movies were shot where actors spoke in their native language because there was never going to be a non dubbed version. That means if you have say, a Finnish actress across from an English actor and an Italian actor playing a side character, in that scene the Finnish actress will speak Finnish, the English Actor will speak English, and the Italian actor will speak Italian, cause it's all going to get dubbed later so who cares. Not shockingly, this doesn't exactly lead to the best acting all the time. Over the top acting, sometimes really fun performances? Sure. Great acting? Not as often.

And why are they beautiful? Because Italian cinema is pretty misogynistic. This isn't a "Felini hates women" thing (but Christ, Felini hated women) it's the more that a woman's value was in her looks and good god did Italy just find the most beautiful women to put in their movies. Such as Anna Falchi, who I think Cemetery Man was her first lead role and you know what, she did a good job, so I am not going to slag on her acting or anything. But she was there because she is so fucking hot and looks even better naked than she does in clothing and that's a rare thing. For her career up until this movie she was largely a model and an actress who played, "The hot girl" in movies. Not as a lead but like if you are going to have a letter delivered to your stalwart police detective in a Giallo, why not have a hot girl in a short skirt and knee high boots deliver it? Those were what she played. This is all a long way of saying I have always been a genius because as a kid I figured out this is what they were doing AND from the first moment I saw Cemetery Man I said, "Jesus, she's hot". Guys, I was right then and I am right now. Today I want to fuck Anna Falchi.

[cartridgeconverter]

Don Giovanni characters as fountain pens

I have long postponed making this post as I was afraid it might convince me to spend more money. However, armed with a new sense of fiscal responsibility, I think I am prepared.

I've tried to have a range of prices that roughly correspond to the status of the characters, as well as many different brands. Honestly all of these are just vibes, but I've tried to give my justifications were I can.

Leporello - Sailor Profit Junior in Kohiru ($60 as part of a limited edition set, including other products)

I know I just said that I would try and match the lower-class characters to appropriately-priced pens, but look at it. It has a bunny on it. This is the best pen ever.

Don Giovanni - Visconti Opera Gold in Red ($348)

This is probably the only pen on this list that I would absolutely never buy, no matter how much opera-themed branding it has, because it is a ridiculous price and also looks stupid. But "ridiculous price" and "looks stupid" are both things I associate with Don G, and he would definitely be a Visconti whore -- it's a brand highly associated with luxury.

My other choice for him is also a Visconti model, this time the Divina Matte in Bordeaux. This is an even more ridiculous price, at $796. However, it is less obnoxiously red than the Opera Gold, so it is an alternate. He probably would have both anyway.

Donna Anna - Nahvalur Voyage in Shanghai ($130)

I have this one! She is beauty, she is grace. She is also very poorly designed but I forgive her for that. This pen is super elegant, albeit large, and is made from resin with real diamond flakes in it. I love the color also - black, with streaks of blue that show up under light. It reminds me a bit of Anna's costume in the Kasper Holten production. It's simply a very beautiful pen (with tons of design flaws and constitution issues, grr).

The Commendatore - Parker Jack-Knife with silver filigree ($5 in 1902, which is equivalent to $183 today)

This is a very lovely vintage pen from the Parker company, of which I scoured this ancient website for a picture (https://parkerpens.net/index.shtml). As an aside, this site is great; it's very well-kept and contains a detailed account of Parker models through time, with pictures. This pen, though gaudy, is exactly the type of thing that I think old men who do things like duels in the middle of the night would have. (Please work with me here, I don't exactly have a lot of content to go off of :P)

Don Ottavio - Sailor Pro Gear Slim, Shikiori Amaoto collection in Kirisame ($360)

Honestly, any purple Sailor will fit for Ottavio. They're generally on the smaller side, but the designs have an elegant simplicity to them. Also, purple. It's him! It's just him.

This will probably be the ultimate piece in my collection. It's such a lovely little thing, with a 21k gold nib. Unfortunately, I will not be purchasing it any time soon, due to my responsible spending habits.

Donna Elvira - LAMY Al-Star in Black Purple ($48)

Also another model I own -- I swear by Lamys as a great everyday pen. They're reliable and ergonomic, even if they're not as visually appealing as some other brands. The Al-Star, being made of aluminum, is a bit of an upgrade from their plastic model, the Safari with a slightly higher price. I think it's very fitting for Elvira, as a travelling woman.

Zerlina and Masetto - LAMY Safari in Savannah Green and Terra Red ($19)

The Lamy Safari is my favorite everyday pen to use, full stop. It's the same model as the Al-Star, but made from a lightweight plastic. They have a very practical and minimalist aesthetic, but it works, and it works well. They're super durable and apparently can survive being run over by warehouse equipment. I just think this model really suits these two, or maybe I'm biased since it's my favorite.

In particular, these are the two special edition colors made to celebrate the 40 year anniversary of the model, as they were the original colors to be manufactured. The green (which I own) matches Zerlina's dress in the IvH production, which is why I named it Zerlina to begin with. That seems to have been a good name - although filling the converter for the first time was a dramatic ordeal, it's been a reliable pen no matter how much wear and tear I put it through (the black paint on the clip has completely flaked off by now).

Hope you guys enjoyed this tenuous connection between my nerdy hobbies that was actually just a vessel for my rant about how much I love Lamy Safaris. I had fun putting it together, even if a few of these are out of my price point right now. Maybe I will do inks next, although I have put less thought into that.

Off of this list, I hope to eventually buy both Sailors (Leporello and Ottavio) as well as the other Safari (Masetto), although that's not a priority. I just like thinking about having nice things.

[hunterrrs]

The moment Evgeni Malkin became a dad, with son Nikita arriving between Games 1 and 2 of the 2016 Stanley Cup Final and weighing in at seven pounds, one ounce, his already-huge heart grew even bigger.

"I remember those first hours after Nikita was born, and it's kind of like someone flipped a switch," said George Birman, a longtime Penguins employee who's a good family friend of the Malkins. "He completely changed and he became such a guardian, a caring person. He's a great dad, he's a crazy dad (laughs), protective dad. He loves Nikita so much, it's unbelievable."

It's been wonderful for Birman - and for all of us! - to watch Geno embrace fatherhood with Nikita, who turned 7 on May 31. With Malkin still a big kid himself in so many ways, it's clear he has a blast being Nikita's dad, posting about some of their adventures to his Instagram account, @emalkin71geno. My personal favorite was the two of them posing in blazers on Nikita's last day of school, captioned, "We are smart and fun."

During hockey season, Nikita loves going to his dad's games, wearing a Penguins jersey and screaming "Let's Go Pens!" with the rest of the crowd. Then, during the summers, Evgeni enjoys taking his little boy to other sporting events, including basketball games, tennis tournaments and, most importantly, soccer matches, as 'fútbol is life' for Nikita.

Last year, Geno gifted Nikita with a Lionel Messi jersey - which he'll surely be wearing even more now that the Argentinian superstar signed with Inter Miami of Major League Soccer, as Evgeni and his wife Anna have a residence in Florida.

"Geno fully supports him, but somewhere pretty deep down it's like damn, Nikita loves soccer more," Birman laughed. "Right now, he's so serious, and he's doing so good, so I don't think it's killing Geno that he plays soccer. He's a great skater. He's unbelievable playing hockey. But at some point, because he was doing hockey in the winter and soccer in the summer, he completely switched to soccer."

Nikita hasn't just inherited Evgeni's athleticism - he inherited his looks. "He looks just like you. It's uncanny, as if you were the same person," Evgeni's parents Vladimir and Natalia wrote in a letter to their son when he reached 1,000 points. "Anna says, there is nothing of mine here!'"

And personality-wise, Birman says that Nikita is competitive like his dad, which comes out whenever father and son play chess.

"When they are playing chess, it gers to the ridiculous point when they both start fighting," Birman laughed. "I'm like, dude, Geno, let him go, or let him win! But no. None of them wants to lose. When they are playing together, it's the funniest thing to watch them. One is like, you're not gonna beat me, you're my kid. And the other one is like, you're not gonna beat me, you're my dad. I'm like, all right, I'm just gonna watch and enjoy."

Well, maybe today, just this once, Nikita will let Geno win. Happy Father's Day to all of our hockey dads!

this was way too cute

[ingravinoveritas]

So for those who haven't seen, AL posted a new Insta story earlier today featuring video of Michael. I subsequently saw this post in the tags and felt like I needed to write something about it:

What obviously stood out and angered me about this was the "chunky Welsh salt-and-pepper boyfriend" in the caption. This seems to be the latest in a line of recent instances of people commenting on Michael's weight/fat-shaming him. The difference in this case, however, is that the post above is directly tied to AL's Insta story. Here is a screenshot of the story, for those who haven't seen it (the full video is linked above):

And what stood out to me here is AL's caption of "Can't take him anywhere," followed by the "You're welcome" (suggesting that we are all supposed to fall over ourselves to thank her for posting video of Michael). Given that the video shows him playing with Lyra in a toy store, this would have been a perfect opportunity for Anna to write a caption about Michael being a great dad, or how much he adores his daughter.

Instead, however, the caption/video is all about Anna, and once again plays up the disingenuous "long-suffering partner of a bumbling man" schtick, which is what many of her Insta stories about Michael have been recently. So when you look at the Tumblr post above, you start to get a feeling for the vibe that her posts/stories are putting out. That if it's okay for AL to make comments about his appearance (as we know she has done for the last several years), then others feel no compunction about doing it, too.

There are plenty of ways to interpret all this, but to me, and especially looking at everything cumulatively, none of this speaks highly to the state of their relationship. The "can't take him anywhere" is another example of AL using an Insta story to insult Michael, to convey that--despite the fact that he is literally very sweetly playing with their daughter--she is embarrassed to be seen with him. When you look at the Tumblr post next to AL's Insta story, you can tell what people are picking up on, which means that these posts and stories are not bringing out the best in her, him, or their relationship.

Again, this is all my own opinion and thoughts, but I think it bears repeating that if someone made a Tumblr post like the one above about Anna, or commented on her weight gain/loss, people would be losing their minds. I'm tired of comments like those and hers getting a free pass because Michael is a man. I'm tired of her making him out to be a ridiculous buffoon who she "has to put up with." And I'm really tired of her thinking his fans don't or won't care as long as she provides new content. Because even though this might just be me, I'd rather have no new content of Michael at all than content where his own girlfriend is repeatedly putting him down...

[imagitory]

Hey all! So recently Wish was added to Disney+, and I thought it might be a good opportunity for me to watch it again for the first time since I saw it in theaters. I asked you all what I should write about after watching it, and in the end, the top answers were an analysis of the criticism surrounding Wish and something focusing more on the positive aspects of the movie, rather than just the usual mindless bashing.

So that's what I intend to write! A look back at some of the common criticisms I've heard about the film, and how much weight they actually have.

Now, before we begin, I should put in a disclaimer -- I don't particularly like Wish as a film. I think it had ridiculous amounts of potential that were likely hampered by corporate decisions, but I personally find it to be one of Disney's weaker animated films. That being said, as promised, I will make any critiques I do include as balanced as I can, and I will try to include praise where I can too.

So let's start!

"Asha is a badly written character because she has no character arc."

This is a critique I actually found on a list also discussing valid criticism of Wish, and I knew I had to include it, because even BEFORE I rewatched the movie, I thought it was a bit unfair. Because here's the thing: there are plenty of good films, Disney or otherwise, where the main character doesn't have/need a character arc. All of Walt's original three princesses, Snow White, Cinderella, and Aurora, don't have character arcs. Ariel doesn't have an arc either -- instead her father Triton is the one who goes through a change of heart. Neither does Pongo, or Basil of Baker Street, or Robin Hood. Indiana Jones doesn't go through any real character development in Raiders of the Lost Ark, yet he was interesting enough to inspire a whole movie series! with mixed results. The important part is that even if a main character doesn't develop personality-wise, we should still be able to root for them and want them to achieve their goal. We don't want Cinderella to be abused by her stepfamily -- we want her to find someone who loves her and will take care of her the way she takes care of others. Although it can be more interesting to give your characters an arc while they pursue their goals, it isn't necessary to tell a good story or write a compelling character. Sometimes a story can be more focused on how their life circumstances or environment changes around them.

Another criticism this leads into is the idea that Asha is just another "quirky female lead" a la Rapunzel, except without any background that justifies it. And well...plenty of people griped that Anna was too much like Rapunzel, when Frozen came out. I saw people compare Moana to both Rapunzel and Mulan, when her film came out. Mirabel was also compared to past Disney heroines like Anna and Rapunzel. Even before Wish came out, people tried to argue that Asha looked just like Isabela Madrigal, which was just ridiculous. There's plenty of bad-faith criticism out there that'll shallowly associate one character or story element with one trope exclusively without looking at any nuance or detail. And I think most people would agree that truthfully, none of these female characters are the least bit "the same," no matter how much someone might try to all boil them down to "the quirky Disney female lead." And, like the others, Asha has traits that set her apart. The big one for me is her bent toward social justice, which is something we haven't really seen in a Disney leading lady since Esmeralda in The Hunchback of Notre Dame. Even so, I admit that Asha's quirkiness isn't as justified by her backstory as the trait is by Rapunzel's isolation or Mirabel's "outcast" status in her family, and that does make it so that her characterization has less depth than those of some of her counterparts'. Does that make Asha a bad character? Of course not. If you like Asha as written, that's totally fine. Underdeveloped doesn't have to mean unlikable.

"There are too many characters in this movie!"

Even I've been a bit guilty of thinking this. I still feel as though the film would've saved a lot of space if some aspects of Asha's friend group had been redistributed to other characters. Like okay, you want to reference the Seven Dwarfs in Asha's inner circle, but give them all distinctive personalities? Have her mother fill the Bashful role, and cut Bazeema. Have her grandpa be Happy, and cut Hal. Have Valentino be your Grumpy role, and cut Gabo. Have Star play your Dopey, and cut Dario. Suddenly you only have three characters -- Simon, Safi, and Dahlia -- to introduce in that kitchen scene instead of seven, and you've also now given Asha's mum, grandpa, and sidekicks more personality as well!

That being said, the amount of characters truly isn't the problem. The real problem is time. Because let's be honest, we can ALL think of media with a large cast of characters we've become strongly emotionally invested in. The Lord of the Rings -- The Avengers -- Hazbin Hotel...but the difference is how much time the audience is given to get to know all of these characters. Even Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs, which has a cast of eleven, ends up leaving the Prince and the Huntsman rather underdeveloped compared to the Dwarfs. We don't ever learn the Evil Queen's whole deal or even her name, and she gets a lot of focus! With Wish only being ten minutes longer than Snow White with a cast of fourteen, it's little wonder the filmmakers struggled to have all fourteen of them leave a strong, unique impact. Even when I first watched the film, I didn't feel anything negative toward Asha's friend group -- if anything, I was happy to see a Disney animated female lead with a friend group of her peers, since the closest we'd gotten to that previously was Hiro in Big Hero 6 and Mei in Pixar's Turning Red. All of Asha's friends had the potential to be very interesting people, and that's why it's sad that we didn't get to see more of them and have the chance to become invested in them as individuals.

"Magnifico was actually right the whole time! Asha is the REAL villain of the story."

I see this one a lot, both from people who disliked the movie and fans who stan Magnifico, and as much as I won't give anyone a hard time for liking Magnifico, I think this view isn't really fair to either character or to the story the filmmakers pretty clearly wanted to tell. And sadly, as much as I want to be positive, I think this interpretation comes about partly because of inconsistent writing on the filmmakers' parts.

In Welcome to Rosas, there is this utopic vision presented of the island -- one that only reinforces the story told to us at the beginning by Asha, of how this man who loves wishes learned powerful magic so he could found this idyllic island kingdom with his wife where he could make wishes come true. Unfortunately, for some viewers, I think that propaganda works a little too well -- making us see Rosas as a place that truly is that happy and content and peaceful. And yeah, that does make it so that when Asha sings about how she wants "more than this," that could make her come across as rather selfish and entitled. But I think there are a few things that are good to remember --

Welcome to Rosas is framed as an advertisement of sorts -- like one of those commercials you see promoting Disneyland and how magical it is, without ever bringing up how much money it costs or how many lines you'll have to stand in. Asha's guiding some new people around with the goal of convincing them to stay and give their wishes to Magnifico, so of course it's going to sanitize the kingdom and make it seem like a place you'd want to stay in. There's blatant hyperbole thrown in there for dramatic effect, like the idea that you could go to outer space. Asha even sings that you're "unlikely to be unhappy": not that you'll be happy living on this island, just not unhappy. And yes, there is a difference between contentment and true, fulfilling happiness.

Simon's friends flat-out call him boring, after he turned eighteen and gave up his wish. This foreshadows what we learn about the wishes later, which is that they're a core part of a person that they're left a shadow of themselves without. At the wish ceremony later on, we can see this in the animation of the two "new citizens" giving their wishes to Magnifico. When they think of their wishes, they're full to the brim with joy, but when they've given them up, they're left looking confused and almost bereft, and even as everyone else cheers, they look unconvinced by the crowd's cult-like "forget without regret" chant. According to Wish's own canon, you're cutting out the "heart" of who you are, when you give up your wish.

Considering Amaya says that Asha will need to keep the tea hot, listen whenever and for however long Magnifico wants to talk, and never question anything, Magnifico didn't want an apprentice -- that would insinuate he'd actually be teaching them magic. If anything, it sounds more like he wanted a personal servant to cater to his whims. And when that person interviewing before Asha disappoints him, he's left running down the hall crying hysterically. This develops Magnifico as the film's future antagonist. Already long before he uses the evil magic book, we see that he wants a subordinate to do whatever he wants without question or complaint, seemingly for nothing in return except his own approval and, I would presume, some sort of paycheck. (I mean, I'm not saying Asha was right to expect favors from Magnifico so soon, or that that kind of quid-pro-quo stuff isn't corrupt as heck, but considering she and Magnifico did seem to connect over how important the wishes were, and considering Sabino's 100 years old, can you blame Asha for opening up about her hope that Magnifico would consider granting her grandfather's wish? She never framed it as a quid-pro-quo, and this probably would be the best chance she'd have to appeal to the King directly.)

Asha is seventeen! Of course her world view is going to be smaller and more idealistic than Magnifico's, and of course her family is going to be the center of her world. At the same time, even if Asha is young, it doesn't mean her perspective isn't worthy of compassion and respect. Sometimes the young do have a more meaningful view of a situation than their elders -- just look at David Hogg, or Malala Yousafzai, or Greta Thunberg...hell, even Anne Frank! However upset Magnifico was about Asha disagreeing with and contradicting him, it does not justify how pettily he decided to shut her down. He was an adult, and a ruler besides: it behooved him to act like one.

The filmmakers clearly envisioned Magnifico as the villain. Even if you want to ignore the promos where they compared Magnifico to the likes of classic Disney villains, Magnifico is portrayed as an arrogant, vain, vindictive control freak. He thinks only he knows what's best for everyone else, has decreed that only he has the authority to cast magic or grant wishes, and knows how beautiful people's wishes are, but prefers to hoard them away like trinkets, long before realizing that crushing them gives him power. (Not to mention he looked at Asha's hand-drawn animation and actually said, "Do we call that a talent?" I mean -- excuse you!) I've even heard some people theorize that Magnifico was based off Disney's "collect-'em-all" CEO himself, Bob Iger, and not in a flattering way. His main argument scene with Asha has been compared to how creatives have felt about their corporate bosses abruptly shutting down and locking away their incomplete films rather than let them be finished or released. Admittedly Wish also goes out of its way to try to make Magnifico sympathetic by giving him the slightest of tragic backstories, having him actually trust Asha enough to show her the wishes after only just meeting her, and (later on) not giving into the temptation of the random evil magic book because Amaya asks him not to, and that definitely muddies the waters. I still have to stand by the fact, though, that one's motivation doesn't excuse their bad behavior, however much one can explain the other. Magnifico having a sad backstory or trauma doesn't mean he's justified in treating people poorly, collecting wishes for his own enjoyment instead of truly loving them and the people they're attached to by sharing them with others, or not wanting people to ever question him or his authority. Magnifico's "nicer" moments don't mitigate these things either. Nor does his role as king. Even if yes, the story could've done well to add more nuance to the idea of wishes and make clear that not all of them are good -- and yes, the story could've either made Magnifico's villainy a bit more straightforward or followed through with the idea of Magnifico being a misguided anti-villain...in this film, we only see good wishes represented in Rosas. Magnifico even calls the wishes "the very best part [of a person]" -- and so one can only presume that all of the wishes Magnifico's collected are that way. Asha even suggests (before Magnifico interrupts her) that if a wish is dangerous, they could probably address that, while still giving back the wishes Magnifico won't grant. And the wish that Magnifico explicitly calls too "dangerous" to grant is Sabino wanting to inspire future generations, presumably through music. Paranoia on Magnifico's part? Perhaps, but also unjustified, in the context of the film. When Star comes down, every last person in Rosas -- including Magnifico's wife and queen, Amaya, who presumably must know something of his trauma and understand wanting to protect their people -- feels nothing but warmth, hope, and joy: all except for Magnifico, who immediately reacts in fear just seeing the wishes moving outside of his control. This insinuates that Magnifico's perception is the odd one out -- he's the only one who's afraid and not inspired, because that alternative magic threatens his absolute rule and control. Just like he's threatened by his people asking too many questions about the wishes he's taken. Just like he's threatened by the idea that Sabino could inspire the next generation in a way he doesn't approve of. And in the end, if that random evil book did corrupt Magnifico, it only magnified what was already there inside of him -- a greedy, obsessive need to hoard things away all for himself and to control others.

Again, for those people who see Magnifico more sympathetically than the filmmakers intended, I can understand why. Wish has two very conflicting ideas of who Magnifico is supposed to be, likely because it was compiled from dramatically different script drafts. But I feel demonizing Asha or ignoring the film's overall message about the value of people being free to chase their dreams to try to prop Magnifico up is misguided.

"Wish is bad because it's 'woke.'"

I almost wonder if I even need to say anything. This sentiment is so disingenuous, it seems like I should really be able to let it speak for itself. Ironically enough, though, I would actually argue that one of Wish's biggest shortcomings is that it isn't as revolutionary as it clearly wants to be.

For one, the culture of Rosas -- inspired largely by Spain and the Mediterranean -- is really never explored. We get no real influence of either of those cultures on the soundtrack aside from a few mandolins and a flourish of castanets now and again, unlike how Encanto embraces Colombia or how The Princess and the Frog celebrates New Orleans with their music. There's a lot of diversity in Wish's cast with a biracial lead and her colorful friend group (including Dahlia, who has a crutch!), but that would be a lot more meaningful if that diverse cast of characters had had fully fleshed-out personalities and relationships that made us emotionally invested in them, such as how Turning Red handled Mei and her friend group. We have aspects of social justice in Wish's storyline, sure -- but as much as you can draw parallels to Wish's story and the writers' strike that had been going on earlier that year and I think those parallels are striking, a film that clearly dealt with so much corporate oversight and meddling almost couldn't commit to making their villain a True Evil sort, and in the end, Rosas doesn't even do away with the absolute monarchy at the end of their supposed "revolution": it just shifts leadership from its King to its Queen. (And yes, I acknowledge saying "no more royalty" is a message that Disney, of all companies, would be hesitant to put out there, but you can't deny, it would've been both ballsy and different.)

Does this mean Bob Iger was right, that Wish is proof its creative types are focusing too much on message and not on entertainment? No. I'd say the bigger problems with the film were more likely caused by corporate interference -- you know, like hiring some popular pop composers to write songs that can be repackaged into other projects easily rather than primarily tell the story and develop the characters. Or deciding that our main female lead has to be able to do everything on her own without "too much help" from her main co-star (LOL, pun) because "feminism." Or defanging the villain with similarities to the company's CEO so he won't scare the kiddos. Or even animating the film at the exact same time as you're writing it like you previously did with Frozen II, to save time and take advantage of the 100th anniversary timing.

Even so, I sadly can't help but feel that Wish is "woke" largely in a performative sense. It features people who look different from each other and it talks about revolution and positive change, but it really doesn't go far enough to depict diversity in a way that people can get really excited about it or inspire deep thought and even maybe positive change in its audience. That's not focusing too much on message and not on entertainment -- if anything, it's more indicative of not giving the relevant and timely themes and the diverse culture enough focus.

"The meta Disney references are awful."

This one I think really is much more subject to personal taste. I've heard quite a few fans say how fun it is to find all the Easter eggs for other Disney projects or even to theorize how Wish could be connected to those movies in some kind of Disney Cinematic Universe. Personally I'm not in this camp, but that doesn't mean that I hate all the references included. The film opening with the exact same kind of text from Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs actually made me smile. The Sleeping Beauty-esque drawing style in the storybook was pretty. Even the Seven Friends as an idea I thought was cute, when I first saw the concept art for them.

By and large, the references I tend to see more favorably are the ones only hard-core Disney/animation fans would pick up on. This might make me sound snooty, but I still personally enjoy references like Star's design being based on one of the star cherubs from a discarded Snow White sequence far more than I do the more blatant ones like Magnifico crushing a dream about a "perfect nanny" or the boy dressed like Rosasbound!Peter Pan. I guess for me, the first kind of references feel more like homages, rather than things that are deliberately supposed to make you think of other Disney movies you could be watching instead of this one. For other people, though, thinking of different Disney films while watching Wish is fun, and it reminds them of how much they enjoy those other movies too. It's good, clean, nostalgic entertainment. And well, Disney has put plenty of Easter eggs in its work before, though usually a bit more sparingly.

So yeah, I think ragging on the flood of Disney Easter Eggs in Wish is a bit unfair. As much as most of them aren't for me and I would've been happier with a lot less of them, I know there are other people who find joy in them, and I'm happy they do. The animators working on this film undoubtedly had a lot of fun including those references too, and I don't blame them! It's fun to create art celebrating what you love with like-minded people.

"Wish's songs are all terribly written."

Now up to a certain point, I could just say exactly what I said against the last criticism -- that this really comes down to personal opinion. Unlike meta Easter eggs, however, music is an art form, and there is real craftsmanship to it -- hell, people study music theory for a reason. And as several Youtubers have discussed before, there are real structural problems to how a lot of these songs are written. In some cases, it's an issue of cadence, where the way the words are sung don't sound like how they'd be naturally spoken aloud. In Knowing What I Know Now, for instance, sometimes the singers use the wrong emphasis on certain words, just based on where they land in the song, such as when Asha sings about Magnifico showing his "TRUE col-ORS in SHADES of GREEN," even if people don't naturally emphasize the second syllable in the word "colors." In other cases, it's over-stuffing a line with words so that the melody line isn't as memorable, such as in This Wish where the amount of syllables per line are all over the place and sentences get cut in weird places --

Isn't truth supposed to set you free? (9) Well, why do I feel so weighed down by it? (10) If I could show them everything I've seen, (10) Open their eyes to all the lies, then (9) Would they change their minds like I did? (8) But when I speak, they tell me, "Sit down!" (9) But how can I when I've already started runnin'? (8) Oh, this is where we've been, (6) But it's not where we belong, (7) And I may be young, but I know I'm not wrong... (11)

There are also cases where the songs barely use any actual rhymes in favor of half-rhymes or worse twist themselves into pretzels just to make an actual rhyme, such as in I'm a Star, with lines such as "When it comes to the universe we're all shareholders // Get that through your system! (Solar!)" and "Ooh, I'm a star! // Watch out, world, here I are!" (Excuse me while I cringe.) And then of course, most infamously, there are the redundant and otherwise weird lyric choices, most commonly cited in Magnifico's And This is The Thanks I Get?!, such as "I got these genes from outer space!" and "I let you live here for free and I don't even charge you rent!"

By and large, people have not responded as well to Wish's soundtrack as they have for many other Disney musicals. It could also be argued that the songs don't tell the film's story as well as they could've. The most egregious example of this is At All Costs, which is supposed to be our villain and hero singing about the beauty of the wishes the first has collected, but was literally written as a love song first, just because Julia Michaels wanted to write a song that could be played at people's weddings even if the movie in question didn't feature any romance. Even This Wish was written well before the script was finished, and this is when we can tell from all the concept art released by Disney that this movie had been dramatically rewritten at multiple stages of development.

And yet even with this, I still see people making animatics for At All Costs featuring their own characters or Asha and the discarded Starboy concept. (And yes, we'll come back to that.) I still see fan-made music videos featuring This Wish. Hell, even I have some of Wish's songs on my IPhone, and I listen to them actively! Knowing What I Know Now, as much as I see what's technically wrong with it, is still a bop for me. However much I had to take a full-on sanity break after listening to I'm a Star a second time, I do enjoy This Wish and At All Costs, just on their own. I don't think This Wish (reprise) is a bad musical or thematic climax, especially if one considers Magnifico's fear that Sabino's wish was to inspire the next generation through music, and it ends up being a song -- sung by his loving granddaughter -- that ultimately defeats our antagonist. I don't think any of Wish's songs really help tell the story as well as other Disney songs do for their films, but I still think there's room for personal taste here. Music -- like all art -- still has an element of subjectivity. It isn't a science -- yes, there is talent and skill involved that can only be mastered with practice and hard work, but there's still a bit of magic that comes with the finished result, and as much as it might not be popular with the masses, that doesn't necessarily make something worthless, or that public consensus can't change. Tchaikovsky famously hated the work he did for The Nutcracker, as did the critics of his day, only for it to go on to become a staple of holiday entertainment and ballet productions overall. Plenty of cult classic films like Labyrinth and Heathers didn't make a lot of money or get lots of praise when they first came out, but soon enough they found their audience.

"The animation is lazy!"

There's actually a much better video discussing this, made by a real professional animator, and I think I'll just let him handle this.

One thing I want to touch on, though, is Jennifer Lee's commentary about why Wish ultimately wasn't done in 2D animation --

"What happens in hand-drawn is that you have the incredible hand of the artist, but also limitations in what you could do on screen. What happened in CG is you'd have incredible, boundless opportunities, visually, that elevated it — even to the point for some — into realism, which is not what we wanted to do. The more important thing to us was to have a way to find technology that can do everything. Connect to the true vision of the artist, but bring in technology that could finally take away limitations."

-- and yeah, I'm not going to lie, this sentiment leaves a really bad taste in my mouth. The idea that hand-drawn animation somehow limits what art you can create is mind-boggling for anyone working in animation to think, but especially for someone working in Disney animation. I can't help but feel like Uncle Walt would've been ticked if he'd heard anyone suggest this. Anyone who loves animation I think would be annoyed by it, and I'd say people like Hayao Miyazaki continue to prove that Lee's thought process isn't true, considering that his hand-drawn film won the Oscar for Best Animated Feature the same year that Lee's Wish was passed over by the Academy altogether. To be fair, though, this is more a reflection on certain Disney leaders' dismissive attitude toward the medium that built their company as well as the vast majority of the films they're supposedly celebrating, rather than any condemnation of the hard-working animators who worked on Wish. And yes, although no one can argue that Wish ultimately doesn't look as good as its animated peers like Sony's Spiderman: Across the Spiderverse (which was made with half the budget Wish was), that's more the fault of a flawed vision on the part of the filmmakers than anything. It's certainly not indicative of a lack of talent, resources, or caring from the animators themselves.

"Wish would've been so much better if it had featured a love story between Starboy and Asha!"

Okay, let me pop this bubble right now --

None of Disney's official releases have ever indicated Star was going to be Asha's love interest.

The concept art featuring Asha and human!Star? Yeah, that exists, but there's nothing strictly romantic in any of those concepts, like them kissing or even hugging. At All Costs originally supposedly being a love song for Asha and Star? As touched on above, nope, it was even more of a cynical corporate decision than that -- the songwriters just wanted to write a love song that they could repackage and use elsewhere, even if there was no love story to go with it. The thing about Asha and Star supposedly being soulmates? That's derived from a comment in the artbook from Wish co-writer Allison Moore, talking about Asha and Star in their current forms, and so therefore the sentiment was intended platonically --

"Now Star and Asha have an emotional journey. They are soulmates."

And well, just based on a good chunk of the Disney animated films that had come out prior to Wish featuring male and female leads -- Zootopia, Moana, Big Hero 6, Wreck-It-Ralph -- there was really nothing definitive to suggest that our two central characters were going to be romantically linked. And even if Star and Asha were going to be love interests, that still would've been no guarantee of a better movie -- you'd still need compelling, well-developed characters, if you want to likewise have a compelling, well-developed relationship between them. And as I've argued in the past, a movie doesn't need romance to be good. If someone could feel sincere platonic love between Star and Asha as their actual movie selves, then any romance between them wouldn't be needed. I truly believe the only reason that so many people have gotten so hung up on the idea of a Star/Asha romance is because that original platonic "soulmates" idea Allison Moore and others envisioned just didn't ring true for them. They saw more love and interesting chemistry between the original concept art versions of Star and Asha than they did between any of the characters in the finished film...and so they've built upon those flickers of love with their own imagination and then built that mental image up into something that I don't think the filmmakers probably ever intended.

I must be honest, it was kind of a slog, watching Wish for a second time. I stopped multiple times to take notes, unable to just sit back and let the movie wash over me. Even so, I truly appreciate how much time you must've spent to skim through this way-too-long analysis, as well as the votes you all cast in that one poll of mine! I love analyzing Disney, and as much as I don't love Wish, I do think it provided great fodder for new fan creations and has amazing potential as an educational tool about both good storytelling and film-making. And if there are more criticisms of Wish you'd like me to discuss, please feel free to reblog this post with them! Thank you for your support!

To close us out...if you love Wish, then keep on loving it! Don't let anyone -- including me -- tell you otherwise. I don't think a film that was truly the worst thing ever would've attracted as much attention or overanalyzing as Wish has received. And for those of you who are still dissatisfied with Wish, here's a list of films I compiled that you can watch and enjoy instead!

For Starboy/Asha stans...Stardust!

For both Starboy and Chris Pine stans...Rise of the Guardians!

For those of you who love the idea of storytelling magic...Whisper of the Heart!

For those of you hungry for a diversely cast, "woke" fairy tale...Rodgers and Hammerstein’s Cinderella (1997)!

For people looking for a colorful, family-friendly musical...Wonka!

For avant-garde animation fans...Guillermo Del Toro’s Pinocchio!

For modern CG animation fans...Puss in Boots: The Last Wish!

And finally, probably most obviously -- for those Disney fans looking for a loving tribute to 100 years of Disney Animation with a bunch of Easter Eggs and good humor...Once Upon a Studio!

Much love to you all! 💛

[atalienart]

I disagree with the Latin stuff and the names. Lucy Sartor and Luna Stellar would sound pathetic to me as well in a more "realistic" not fully fairytale-esque context, just like Gardner and Taylor; or worse, because those are at least actual common surnames. I think it's depending on the language you're writing for. My first language is a romance language, not English, and all the names that try to be clever using Latin sound way more obvious at best and straight up ridiculous at worst to me. Like, say, Harry Potter. It all sounded so silly 6yo me was mocking them with my mother while we read. Of course Remus is called Lupin and of course Snape is Severus and Draco is called Malfoy. Of course xD

I do like the subtlety of names too, and I was just discussing with a friend a few days ago how interesting it is in a mix of narrative and metanarrative way that names are almost always meaningful in fiction, because it seems to create that tension between what is predetermined and what isn't in fiction. Almost as if the character at some point could turn around and look at the writer directly. As if they had the weight of the life they had to live since they were born, worldbuilding aside (obviously not as interesting in the context of actual in-world prophecies and such), and that is precisely the text! Like that one chapter in Nietszche's Zarathustra. "Good and evil, and joy and woe, and I and thou—coloured vapours did they seem to me before creative eyes".

Personally, I don't see a problem with those names. Are they on the nose, sure, but they don't sound pathetic to me. As I said, it's your own language that makes you like them or not. I remember that the minister of magic was called Fudge? (if we're taking HP as an example) and it was translated in the Polish version as Knot (which can come from "knocić", making something really poorly) and I really loved it, it made me laugh. But I wouldn't want them to translate dr House's surname because it would sound really silly. And even if I know what those names mean it's fine, I have another context.

I myself usually either look for names beginning with a particular letter so it's easier to tell the characters apart, or just think what suits them sound-wise. Then I check what the name means and sometimes I get really surprised. Sometimes I go look for names from other languages. With surnames it's similar. I also play with letters or look for words at random. To someone, somewhere they will always sound silly because they'll sound similar (or identical) to some random word. It's how it is. But I also use Latin to name some things and I don't think they are worse because people who know Latin or romance languages will recognise the connection/meaning, that's why I use it. (Shit, I even have a character named Korbin who takes care of ravens xD) I remember a discussion about the Grishaverse and how to Russian speaking people it was just Georgieverse. It's how it is. Sometimes I cringe seeing Polish names used in English books. Sometimes writers use the diminutive version of a name thinking it's a legit normal name. I mean...

I really wonder how would you solve the subtlety issue, taking into consideration that to have a meaning behind the word you need to take that word from an existing language. Like would you think if I named a character Anna Lato it would sound subtle for your ears? "Lato" means "summer" in Polish, it's also a surname. Anna comes from Latin but functions as a normal name. Let's say the character has a sunny personality. Is this subtle enough? To someone somewhere, (probably in Poland) it might still sound silly.

[melswifeasf]

Find my way back to you pt 2

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Pairing: Sam Carpenter x Fem!OC

Summary: Sam and Estelle met eight years ago after Sam stupidly takes harder drugs than she can handle.

Warning: Drug use and cursing

notes: this was a bit more boring than i expected but this is how they met! pls lmk what you guys would like to see more of:)

word count: 3034

“yo, come on” Elias called for his sister as she approached him slowly. the muscular boy was sitting on the hood of ‘69 Mustang in the parking lot of the school as he smoked a cigarette. he was sitting with his two friends, Alex and Xavier among them sat their girlfriends who were all chatting with one another.

the three boys each were tall with dark hair and tattoos littered around their body. typical cliche gang bangers yet all of their girlfriends were either on the cheer time or live in the rich side of town. probably the most cliche part of it all was the fact that they even surrounded themselves with drug dealers like them.

Estelle rolled her eyes, “why the fuck do you even make me carry it?” she said annoyed as she took off her black backpack and threw it on the ground in front of her brother.

Elias and Alex were the only ones with cars. Alex had an up to date Yellow Mustang that he loved to show off at any moment and time. they were all seniors although they were barely even in class which confused Estelle on how they planned to graduate.

“cause the cops are up my ass lately. they ain’t ever gonna check you” he said with a chuckle. Estelle rolled her eyes again as she moved his brother to the side so she could sit beside him, the blonde on his left sending glares toward her, only fueling her annoyance.

she never liked Anna, she was head of the cheer team and always made her existence fucking miserable the moment she came out her freshman year, now a year later she bit her tongue but that mostly had to do with the fact that Elias would kill anyone who made any comments toward his sister. Estelle always preferred Elias ex girlfriend, Natalia, but they had broken up a year ago when he first got arrested for jumping two guys who wouldn’t pay him the money they owed him.

she missed her. Natalia had been her only friend, everyone else was too afraid to even talk to her, the fear of her brother fucking them up or being around someone as dangerous as him made her a people repellent.

she only ever talked to her girlfriend Valerie but they were off and on every other week so the feeling of being alone all the time never really went away.

“whatever” Estelle scoffed, “hurry up. i have to get to class” she said crossing her arms and tapping her pointer finger against her hand rapidly. she was nothing like her brother, unlike him, she wanted, needed to get a good education so she could get the fuck out of Woodsboro. it’s not that she hated the small town but her name had been trashed around for years, for reasons she never cared to talk about.

“chill. i just gotta sell these and you’re free to go” he said holding up a small ziplock bag with three pills inside. she knew what they were instantly causing her eyes to widen.

“since when do you fucking sell Oxy?” she said in a low and rushed tone. her eyes searched the parking lot to make sure there wasnt anyone looking. the only person she saw was a raven haired girl walking toward them.

the girl had on a black jacket with a white crop top underneath, her toned stomach was slightly peaking out of it and her jeans hugged her curves like nothing Estelle had ever seen before.

she swallowed silently as she watched the girl approach them slowly.

“since someone’s willing to pay double it’s worth”he said with a smirk. the dark haired girl was standing in front of them seconds later.

“one-fifty, right?” she asked. she didn’t seem nervous or fidgety meaning this wasn’t her first time buying from him. she must know one-fifty for three fucking pills was ridiculous but then again she must’ve been desperate to buy them.

“yeah” Elias said, his eyes surveyed the area around them in one quick motion before he reached his hand out and grabbed the money at the same time that he placed the small bag in the girls hand.

it was then that Estelle realized she knew who she was. Samantha Carpenter, she was in the same grade as her and they shared two classes together. she never pegged her as a junkie but that seemed to happen a lot ever since Elias made her hold his drugs. since then she was always there for the dealings and she had seen a lot of rich kids as well as shy and nerdy people buy from him which surprised her greatly.

Sam nodded as she looked down at the bag to make sure it was all there before she moved her hand and put it in her jacket pocket. she was about to turn and leave when she turned toward Estelle, her eyes stopping on her as they trailed up and down her body in one full swoop.

Estelle raised a brow at her, confused on why she was still standing around. Sam took one last look at her before turning her body and walking away.

Estelle isn’t sure why her heart began to race when Sam looked at her the way she did or why her hands began to feel clammy or even why she felt her face heat up, either way she didn’t want to know.

“whatever. i’m leaving” Estelle announced as she pushed herself off of the car and walked away.

“have a good day baby sis!” Elias called out causing Estelle to hold her hand up and give him the finger without turning. she heard her brother laugh along with his friends which made her lips curve into a small smile.

two hours before school was over Estelle was in the bathroom fixing up her makeup. she applied her lipgloss carefully before she looked at herself in the mirror to make sure she looked good. once she was done she put the tube inside her makeup bag and zipped it.

her day was pretty basic, she took notes and tried her best to finish her homework so she wouldn’t have to worry about it later and have the time to see her girlfriend.

just as she was about to leave the bathroom the door swung open and a certain raven haired girl threw herself inside, her body colliding with the wall before she laughed.

Estelle pinched her eyebrows together as she quickly rushed toward the girl. she expected to see the look like she was in pain considering how harsh her body hit the wall but instead Sam looked dazed a lazy grin on her lips as she laughed softly.

she was completely out of it.

“fuck” Estelle whispered as she tried to have Sam supper her body on her own. “are you good?” she asked softly hitting the hispanic girl on her arm.

“i’m fucking amazing” she breathed out.

Estelle shook her head, “come on, i’m taking you home” she said as she grabbed Sams arm and swung it over her shoulder. the hispanic girl didn’t seem to mind as she laid her head on Estelle’s shoulder.

the shorter girl tried her best to ignore the nervous feeling she got in her stomach at the action as she tried her best to walk out of the school without being caught by administration. although her brother was ever teachers worst nightmare, they all had a soft spot for Estelle and she did not want that to change by being caught for ‘cutting class’. god, why the fuck would she do drugs during school hours?

the pair reached the exit of the school in enough time that none of the administrators were able to see them. Sam was saying incoherent things and laughing at her own words making Estelle hush her every couple of seconds.

Estelle reached for the back of her pocket and pulled out her car keys. unlike her brother she own a beat up Camry that she had bought with her own money whilst working at the theatre during the summer.

the shorter girl gripped the handle of the passenger side door and opened it, slowly and carefully she helped Sam inside.

“can you put your seatbelt on?” Estelle asked as she was bent down so she was at eye level with the girl.

Sam shook her head, "can you put your seatbelt on?" she shot back.

Estelle huffed angrily, "lean back" she said as she reached across the taller girls body with the seatbelt in hand and clicked it in. once she was securely inside Estelle pulled away and stood. as soon as the door closed Sam leaned her head against it and closed her eyes.

this is not how Estelle was hoping to spend her day and yet here she was, driving a stranger home because she took too many fucking pills. her brother would be hearing about this.

she took a deep, exasperated breath and walked to the drivers side. she opened the door and got inside, immediately putting the key inside the ignition and turning the car on. it wasn't too hot or too cold, the crisp fall air making it so you'd only need a jacket but Sams body temperature was abnormally warm and she did not need to have an incident where she needed to take her to the hospital or something worse.

"i need to know where you live" Estelle said and turned her body to face Sam. the girl didn't budge, her chest rising and falling evenly hinting that she was most definitely sleeping. Estelle cursed silently as she pulled out her phone and went to her brothers messages.

Sis: where does Sam live?

fuckface: who tf is Sam?

Sis: r u serious? the girl u literally sold drugs to two hours ago???

fuckface: ohhhh lmao. idk some rich neighborhood. i think i got the address let me check.

Estelle tapped against the steering wheel impatiently as she waited for her brother to text back. she glanced at Sam periodically to see if she would wake up but she was completely knocked out.

shit.

Estelle reached over the console and placed two fingers on the girls neck to search for a pulse, a breath of relief leaving her lips as she felt it pounding heavily against her fingers.

Estelle had never really dabbled in drugs, at least not hardcore ones. she would sometimes smoke weed with her brother or at parties but that wasn't all that often. she just never saw the hype. the first time she smoked weed made her have a full on panic attack so every time she smoked now, she made sure it was way less than what she had done that time. she didn't care much to judge others for doing them but if she could choose between having them in her life or not, she'd choose the latter. she hated that her brother sold them, in fact she had tried to convince him to get a real job with her instead but he always said no. selling drugs made him way more money than a regular nine-to-five. plus he didn't have to get off his lazy ass and do much in Estelle's opinion.

the girl drove in silence, the radio turned off as she followed the map on her screen. she arrived at her destination ten minute after leaving the parking lot.

once she pulled up, she looked out the window in slight awe. the house wasn't huge but it was nice, extremely so. it looked like the typical suburban home, the kind you see in movies with two loving parents and their kids. dinner every night and breakfast before school and work, the kind in which they have family game/movie nights and they spend their summer time at some island. all of the things Estelle had never seen.

she sighed softly as she turned toward Sam and shook her awake, it took her a couple of seconds until she finally stirred.

"five more minutes" she groaned softly causing Estelle to roll her eyes, a small almost nonexistent smile ghosting her lips.

"come on. we're at your house" Estelle said. once she said those words Sam jumped and looked at her surrounding.

"how did i get here?" she asked and snapped her head toward Estelle. the young girl could tell she was still high by the way her eyes were shinning and how erratic she looked. she just seemed a bit more sober compared to when she stumbled into the bathroom.

"i drove. probably shouldn't give your address to your dealer. come on, you need to get out" Estelle said as she took the girls seatbelt off.

Sam shook her head and whined softly, "no. i don't want to"

Estelle closed her eyes as she breathed in and out as she tried to calm her anger. she didn't want to be babysitting a fifteen year old girl but it looked like she didn't have much of a choice. the house looked empty, no cars on the road or the driveway signaling no one was home. she could just have Sam go inside on her own but there was still the very prominent fact that Sam was high off of her ass and she couldn't barely walk with Estelle's help, let alone without it.

"fine" Estelle sighed out and took off seatbelt impatiently. she yanked the keys out of the ignition and opened the door in own swift motion. a few steps and she reached the passenger side with Sam peering up at her. she opened the door softly, careful so that Sam wouldn’t be leaning against it and fall out. Estelle pointed at the seatbelt, “can you take it off?”

Sam looked down at where Estelle had pointed and nodded. she did so slowly and once it was off Estelle held her hand out. Sam looked at it curiously and slowly her eyes met hazel ones. Estelle sighed again.

“come on, you can barely walk” with that much of an explanation Sams hand slowly landed on Estelle’s where she shifted all her weight and got out of the car. Estelle helped her as she gripped onto the end of her arm and held her stance firmly.

once the taller girl was standing upright, Estelle closed the car door behind her and locked it with her key before putting it in her back jean pocket. the action reminded her of something she hadn’t thought about beforehand, “do you have keys?” she asked hope laced in her voice. otherwise she had no idea what to do.

Sam nodded as her free hand moved behind her body and into her back pocket, the sound of keys jangling grabbing Estelle’s attention. Sam said nothing as she handed Estelle the keys.

the walk to the door was slow but a lot more steady compared to the walk to the car at school. Sam wasn’t laughing and talking to herself, instead she was extremely focused on getting one foot in front of another.

at the door Estelle tried two different keys before she finally got the right one, she pushed it inside the lock and moved it to the right, the sound of it unlocking reaching her ears. she carefully reach for the doorknob and twisting it, once so she pushed it open.

instantly she was hit with a scent of vanilla and a slight earthy aroma much like what Sam smelled like - not that she was paying attention. obviously.

Estelle helped Sam go inside first before she followed. the two girls were inside and Estelle closed the door behind her, locking it in the process. “where’s your room?” she asked craning her neck as much as she can to look at Sam.

Sam motioned upstairs earning a nod from Estelle. she walked toward it, telling Sam to hold onto the railing with her other hand and take one step at a time. once they were at the top she stopped and waited for Sam to tell her where to next.

soon they were in the girls room and Estelle tried her best to not look around and seem nosy. she wasn’t Sams friend and she did not care about who she was. all she was doing is simply helping a person in need. that’s all.

“come on” Estelle said as she took Sams arm off of her shoulder and practically shoved her on the bed. Sam didn’t protest as she immediately cuddled into her pillow.

“you gonna be okay?” Estelle asked.

Sam moaned, “yeah” she sighed.

“great” Estelle said simply and began to walk toward the door and get the fuck home so she could get ready for cheer practice when a small almost unintelligible groan reached her eardrums.

she groaned silently and looked up. fuck.

she quickly turned around and saw Sam with her eyes closed and a small frown on her lips. why couldn’t she be like her brother and not give a fuck about what happened to her?

with a slight eye roll she approached the bed and began to unlace Sams boots. she did one at a time before she took them both off and placed them on the ground softly, careful to not make noise. once done she grabbed the blanket thrown on the bed and placed it on Sams sleeping body. the girl stirred a little but slowly her breath began to even out once more.

if she was this out of it, it’s likely she wouldn’t be remembering anything about that day let alone how she got home. without another option Estelle walked toward the desk with a closed laptop and books along with notebooks littered around messily. she grabbed the black notebook and ripped a page out before reaching for a pen. she scribbled something down and placed it on the girls nightstand.

once done she walked out of the room without another glance back.

i brought you home cause you’re high as fuck. drink water and don’t you dare take anything else until you’re feeling normal again.

-Estelle

[ereardon]

Part Two: The Wedding Day

Summary: Bradley “Rooster” Bradshaw has been your best friend for a decade. He’s also your fiancé’s best man. So when he shows up at your hotel room the night before your wedding, it’s just because he’s your friend, right? 

Pairing: Bradley “Rooster” Bradshaw x Reader 

Warnings: Angst, pining, weddings, cursing, smut, cheating 

WC: 5.2K

See part one here; series masterlist here

“Hold on, the back of your shoe is sliding off.” 

Anna crouched down in her pale pink silk dress and grabbed your ankle, pulling up the strap on your heels. 

“Is that better?” 

You nodded and she caught your gaze in the mirror, smiling. She straightened up and grabbed your arms with her tiny, cold hands. 

“You look beautiful.” 

You stared into the mirror. You saw what everyone else saw: a bride in a white dress. But you didn’t see what you should have seen.

A bride who couldn’t wait to walk down the aisle to the person she wanted to spend the rest of her life with. 

He was at the end of the aisle. They both were. 

That wasn’t the problem. 

You picked up your perfume and spritzed it on your exposed collarbones and wrists. Anna smiled. 

“That’s his favorite, isn’t it?” she asked, adjusting the one-shoulder tie of her silk gown. 

You looked down at the pink Chanel bottle in your hands. “Yeah, it is.” 

You remembered the first day you wore it. It was the day that you went to visit Jeremy and Bradley at Lemoore. They had been stationed there for four months after Pensacola. You were teeming with nervous energy as you got off the plane, tote bag hiked high on your shoulder, practically spilling out with housewarming gifts for the guys. At this point, Jeremy and Bradley had lived together for four years at the academy, and four years after in Florida. They were practically brothers. For all intents and purposes, you were their third wheel. 

You stepped off the plane and were already sweating. In the airport bathroom you fixed your hair and makeup, adjusted the sundress you were wearing that you knew Jeremy loved, and touched up your lipstick before pulling out your phone and calling him. 

“Hi baby, I’m here!” 

“Honey, I’m so sorry.” Jeremy’s deep voice rang through the phone and you felt your heart plummet. “I got called in for a watch. I’ll be home late. But I’m sending Bradshaw, he should already be there.” 

“Oh, OK,” you said, clearly dejected. 

“I love you and I’ll see you when I get home, OK? Keep the bed warm for me baby.” 

“I will.” 

You hung up the phone with a frown and exited the bathroom. You were looking down, peering inside of your ridiculously oversized tote that Jeremy always mocked you for because it seemed to swallow and lose every single one of your possessions, when you heard a familiar voice. “Y/N!” 

You looked up with a grin. Bradley was wearing his flight suit and a pair of aviator glasses, which he whipped off when he spotted you, not even hesitating before breaking out in a jog, pulling you seamlessly into his arms, one hand spread across your back. 

You breathed him in. Bradley. Just as Jeremy had become an integral part of your life, so had Bradley. He was there for all the important things: your graduation from Georgetown, when you bought your first car, he helped Jeremy build all of the shitty IKEA furniture in your crappy apartment, he was there when you got your GMAT scores back. Bradley had always been there. 

Even when Jeremy wasn’t. 

He pulled back, hands still resting on your waist, brown eyes drinking you in. “You look great, honey.” 

Your fingers gripped his forearms softly. “You too, Bradshaw.” 

He paused. There was so much that never needed to be said between you and Bradley. One look and you just knew. He understood you. “Let’s get your bag, OK?” 

You nodded, hiking your purse higher onto your shoulder and Bradley leaned over, guiding it off your arm seamlessly, holding it in his hand. With his other hand, he pressed against your lower back, propelling you forward toward baggage claim. 

In the Bronco, Bradley turned up the A/C. It was hot. Too fucking hot. You slipped out of your sandals and lifted your bare feet onto the dash, feeling the familiar warmth of the truck’s seats hugging your back. You looked at him with a smile, sliding on your sunglasses. 

“Missed you,” you said softly as Bradley took a right turn out of the airport terminal. 

He reached over, squeezing your hand. “Missed you more, Ace.” 

You turned back to the road, humming softly. 

Back at the apartment, you sighed. It was in clear need of a woman’s touch. There was a rough looking leather couch, a small four-person dining room table, a dirty lamp in one corner. Jeremy and Bradley were many things, but they were not homemakers. The two of them combined had about as much taste as a contestant who got cut in the first round of Queer Eye auditions. 

“I’ll put your stuff in Jer’s room,” Bradley said, carrying your luggage and purse into the room at the end of the hall. 

You scoped out the kitchen, already making a mental list of all the things you would need to buy for them. Maybe Bradley would let you borrow the Bronco, even though you knew he hated letting people drive it. 

Opening a cabinet next to the fridge you frowned. There was a small pepper grinder, a salt shaker and then up on a high shelf a bag that you could just barely make out. You stretched, letting out a small grunt as you reached for it, before a tall shadow enveloped you and you felt Bradley behind you, tanned muscular arm reaching up seamlessly and pulling the bag down. He set it on the counter. “It’s coffee.” 

You turned around, back against the counter, and smirked. “I can see that now.” 

Bradley kept one arm on the counter behind you, so you were trapped. “You smell great, Ace. What is that?” 

You grinned. “Coco Mademoiselle.” 

Bradley squinted. 

“Chanel perfume, Bradley,” you clarified and he nodded. You looked up at him. He was still close, so close you could smell him. Fresh, like grass after a rainstorm. “Brad?” 

“Yeah?” 

“Should we grab some dinner?” 

He took a step back. “Anything you want, Ace.” 

Later that night, you fell asleep on the couch waiting for Jeremy to come home. Bradley looked down. You were snoring softly, your head resting in his lap. He brushed hair out of your face and eased off of the couch gently, gathering you into his arms and carrying you down the hall to Jeremy’s room. He set you down on the bed softly, pulling the covers over your body. As he turned to leave, your fingers shot out, grabbing his wrist. “I love you, Brad,” you murmured. 

He leaned down, brushing a kiss over your forehead. “I love you, too.” 

Bradley laid down in his own room, fan blasting over his sweaty skin, waiting. Finally, he heard Jeremy unlocking the front door, heavy footsteps down the hall. He heard your giggle as Jeremy presumably woke you up, the not-so-muffled sounds of your excited reunion. 

He rolled over and pressed earplugs into his ears to drown out the sounds of your high pitched moans as Jeremy’s cock plunged into you over and over until you were practically wailing, your fingers gripping his muscular arms, your sweaty bare breasts slapping against his chiseled chest as you rode him so hard the bed knocked into the adjoining wall with Bradley’s. 

He groaned and buried his head under a pillow. 

And in the morning, he had to take a deep breath as he watched you make coffee in nothing more than a pair of lace panties and a ribbed tank top you had obviously stolen from Jeremy’s drawers, nipples prominently on display beneath the thin white fabric. You turned to him with a grin. “Hot as shit out, isn’t it?” you asked. 

Bradley nodded before turning around, exiting the kitchen empty handed. “Yeah, too hot.” 

Anna handed you the floral bouquet. The white satin ribbon was tight beneath your fingers as you fidgeted with it.

“Y/N?” Her voice rang out in the empty suite. You looked up. 

“Yeah?” 

“The photographer is waiting downstairs for the bridal portraits. Are you ready?” 

You smoothed your hands along the silky fabric of your dress. You remembered the day you bought it. 

Anna was supposed to come out and meet you in San Francisco but her grandmother had a stroke and the salon had only one available appointment. Moving the appointment date by even a week would be cutting it too close to get the tailoring done before the wedding. 

You were disappointed, but it happened. You knew what you wanted. Something simple. Silk or satin, no lace. No frills. Anna would just try to convince you to try on something insane anyway, like a fully beaded corset dress. Something outside of your comfort zone. 

You drove the four hours to the city from Lemoore and dropped your bags at the hotel. It was a long trip, and Jeremy had booked you a room knowing you wouldn’t want to make the drive there and back in the same day. 

At the salon, the woman at the front smiled and asked for your name. You gave it to her and she looked at the screen. “And is your maid of honor Anna still coming?” 

You shook your head, trying to hide your emotions. “No, um, it’s just me.” 

“Well then,” she said, “let’s get you back in the dressing area.” 

You nodded, following her along the plush white carpeted hallway. 

The bridal associate helped you pick out a few dresses. She measured your waist and hips and chest, and left the changing room after laying out a silk ballgown on the floor, creating a well in the middle for you to step into so she could clip you in. You tugged the curtain aside once you were in, and she re-entered, yanking up the dress and clipping you in. 

The associate held open the curtain and you stepped up gingerly onto the platform in front of the tri-paneled mirror. 

“You look beautiful.” 

Your eyes caught Bradley’s through the mirror. He stood a few feet back from the podium, hands at his sides, a genuine smile spread across his face. 

You whipped around, tossing yourself into his arms before leaning back and pounding on his muscular bicep with one hand. 

“Brad! What on Earth are you doing here!” 

“Your mom told me that Anna bailed,” he said softly. “And I knew you wouldn’t want to do this alone.” 

The associate raised her eyebrows. “It’s frowned upon for the groom to see the bride in her dress,” she said. “Let alone help pick the dress.” 

“Oh he’s not my fiancé,” you said, eyes still locked on Bradley’s. “He’s my best friend.” 

Bradley smiled. “Let’s find you a dress, princess.” 

“I’m going to check on the musicians, OK?” Anna stood at the door, one hand on the handle. “Will you be alright while I’m gone?” 

You gave her a weak smile. “It’s my wedding day. Of course I’ll be fine.” 

She grinned, slipping out of the door of the suite. 

You walked over to the wet bar and pulled a rocks glass from the cabinet, grabbing a bottle of Grey Goose and dumping it in with a splash. You lifted it to your lips. 

It burned going down. 

You were eight drinks deep and feeling it. You were still young, only twenty three, and open bar weddings were a novelty. A delightful novelty. 

You returned to the table and practically collapsed on the chair, the green satin bow adorning the back sliding to the ground. Bradley grinned at you from the next chair over, elbow leaning on the table. 

“You’re wasted,” he muttered, shaking his head. 

“Am not!” you cried and he laughed as you sent a glass flying onto its side, dribbling water all down the white tablecloth. 

“Fuck, Ace,” he said, “be careful.”

“Sorry,” you said sheepishly, righting the glass which thankfully was not broken and taking a sip of water. You closed your eyes briefly. “OK fine, I’m drunk.” 

He nodded, standing up and tossing his suit jacket over one arm. “Come on, I’m taking you home.” 

You pouted and Bradley almost caved. You could get him to do practically anything with that look. But the one thing you couldn’t get him to do was ignore your safety. 

“Nope, not gonna work tonight, Y/N,” he said quietly. “Come on, I got you.”

He hauled you to your feet, your four inch stilettos doing nothing for your ability to look less than inebriated. The two of you pulled an Irish goodbye, not even stopping to talk to the bride and groom, friends of yours and Jeremy’s that you two had met once he and Bradley were stationed in Pensacola right after graduating from the academy. 

Jeremy was meant to be your date, but he got called up for a mission at the last second and called in Bradley as his reinforcement. Bradley drove the two of you in his Bronco to New Orleans for the wedding. 

You stumbled entering your hotel in the CBD. You had wanted to stay in the Quarter, but Jeremy had insisted the central business district had better, cleaner hotels. 

You plopped down on the king bed, pawing at the ankle straps of your heels, grunting when your fingers couldn’t quite grip them right. 

“Hey, hey, hold on a second.” 

Bradley locked the door behind him, crossing the room and coming to kneel in front of where you sat on the bed, his thick fingers easily working the clasps of your black heels, sliding them off of your feet. You looked down at him. “Thank you.” 

“No problem.” 

Bradley stayed kneeling between your legs. Unconsciously, you spread your thighs wider. His eyes turned to saucers and he started to stand but you reached out, pressing your hands to the tops of his shoulders. “Bradley?” 

“Yeah?” 

“What would you do if I asked you to kiss me?” 

A groan bubbled out of his throat. Bradley raised his hands to your bare legs, fingers slipping over your calves, up to behind your knees. Desire was practically burning him alive. “I’d say what about Jeremy.” 

Things with you and Jeremy were good, for the most part. But he was gone a lot. And you were young. Sometimes you wanted more than someone who was good on paper. Sometimes you wanted someone who was there. Someone who looked at you the way Bradley did when he thought you didn’t notice. 

“Y/N,” he whispered. “What are you doing?” 

“Testing a hypothesis,” you said, leaning down and pressing your lips against his. In an instant, Bradley’s hands were on your cheeks, cupping your neck, running down your sides, coming to grip your waist. 

“Fuck,” he grunted against your skin as you kissed him back, sliding further to the edge of the bed, wrapping your legs around his shoulders. 

His hands pushed up the black fabric of your dress around your hips, revealing the thin strip of lace between your legs. He practically salivated looking at it. You opened your legs wider and Bradley lunged forward, tearing it off with one hand, tossing the ripped lace over his shoulder onto the ground. He leaned in, licking up against your already wet folds, pulling a moan from your throat. One large hand pressed down on your hips, the other came to your core, nudging you apart, scissoring your entrance. And then Bradley plunged one thick finger inside of you, causing you to scream out in surprise and ecstasy as he immediately nudged against your g-spot with his thick, calloused fingertip, his tongue flicking perfectly against your clit, forcing you to clench down on him within seconds. 

“Fuck yes,” he muttered against your clit, tongue circling your swollen bud, adding another finger to your drenched cunt, fucking into you hard as you tried to lift your hips off the bed, desperate for more of him. 

“Yes, yes!” you moaned, your walls closing in on his fingers. “Gonna come, oh God!” 

And then you were coming around his fingers, Bradley’s face buried deep against your clit, his fingers thrusting up inside of you until you were screaming at the overstimulation. 

You wasted no time pulling him to you, fingers bunched on the fabric of his white button down shirt, desperate for the weight of his muscular body on top of yours. You slid out of the rest of your dress, fingers flying to Bradley’s belt. 

“Slow down, Ace,” he said, covering your hand with his, your fingers struggling with the zipper fly. 

“No,” you murmured against his neck, kissing him until he was purring in your ear. You slid your fingers under the waistband of his suit pants, pulling them down just enough to expose his boxers. You yanked those down, freeing his hard cock. Immediately, you wrapped your fingers around his length, moaning at how hard and thick he was. 

“Shit, baby, God that feels so good,” Bradley moaned into your neck as you pumped his length.

You opened your legs wide, feeling his hot, weeping tip sweep over your swollen and wet cunt. “Fuck me, now, Roo,” you whimpered and Bradley couldn’t control himself. With a single thrust he was pushing himself all of the way inside of you, your fingers coming out to clutch at his back, a scream rippling through your throat as you practically ripped in half to accommodate his size. “Oh my GOD,” you wept, legs shaking. “You’re huge.” 

“Sorry, sorry,” he murmured against your neck, stilling inside of you. Normally, Bradley was tender with girls. He knew he was large, he tried to make it as comfortable as he could. But with you, he was desperate. He was on fire. He was possessed. “Shit, baby, are you OK?” 

You nodded, a tear leaking down your cheek. “Yes, Roo, just fuck me, please?” 

That sent all of the blood back to his cock and he leaned onto his forearms, slamming his hips into yours, forcing a string of moans out of your mouth. You bit down on his shoulder through his shirt, leaving lipstick marks on the white fabric, as Bradley moaned in your ear. He was practically whimpering as you leaned down and grabbed behind your knees, pulling your own legs back, letting him angle even deeper inside of you. “Shit,” he hissed in your ear, “you like it rough don’t you? Want me to fuck you until you can’t walk.” 

“Yes!” you sobbed, feeling him brush so far inside of you that your eyes rolled back into your head. Your orgasm was a volcano moments before eruption. “Fuck, fuck, I’m going to come again.” 

“Come for me, princess,” he muttered against your chest, taking one nipple into his mouth and sucking. He popped off with a loud suction. “Let me feel you coming on my cock. Been thinkin’ about this for so long, Jesus you feel so good.” 

“Fuck, Bradley!” And then you were crashing around him, your walls squeezing so tight Bradley could barely thrust his cock back inside of you. He watched your face, your eyes squeezed shut tightly, perfect mouth rounded in an “o” as you cried out his name. That sent him over the edge and he sat up, grabbing your hips with his large hands, lifting your ass slightly off the bed, fucking into you like a mad man, feeling your cum dripping around his cock as he pressed forward, collapsing against your chest with a cry, painting inside of you, making you his. 

The two of you laid there, sweaty, still attached. For a moment, neither of you said anything. 

And then your phone started to ring where it sat on the pillow. You looked at Bradley in horror. He pulled out of you quickly and you rolled over, grabbing for the phone, answering it and standing up. 

“Hello?” 

There was a muffled sound on the other end. Bradley watched as you walked to the closet, pulling a bathrobe off of the hanger and sliding it on. When you turned to him, he noted the way your mascara and eyeliner were smudged and running down your cheek from where your tears had slid. You looked on the verge of tears again. 

“Yeah, he’s here,” you whispered into the phone, looking directly at Bradley. “We had a good time at the wedding. I’ll call you tomorrow when we’re on the road?” 

Bradley slid on a pair of boxers and stood on the opposite side of the bed. He dragged a hand down his face in anguish. 

Your gaze was still locked on him. “I love you, too,” you said softly into the receiver. 

You hung up. Bradley opened his mouth. 

You cut him off. “This never happened.” And then you went into the en suite bathroom, locked the door, and sat on the floor and cried. 

“Everyone is downstairs, honey. Are you ready?”

You looked up at your dad. He felt tall. You felt like you were five years old again, playing dress up. It didn’t feel like your wedding day. None of it felt real. 

Where had all of the years gone? How had you gone from a little girl to a woman in the blink of an eye? It felt almost comical that they were letting you get married. You were thirty one, but you felt like a child wearing your mom’s shoes in her walk-in closet. 

Your father stood by the door in his black tux. Anna was next to him, carrying both her bouquet and yours. The wedding planner had her clipboard out, foot tapping nervously on the plush carpet of the suite. 

You nodded. 

“Let’s go.” 

“Get out!” 

“Baby.”

“Leave!” You practically threw yourself at the door closing it behind you. Jeremy stood on the other side of the bedroom door, his bedroom door. You slid to the ground, tears streaming down your face. After a moment, you heard Jeremy’s exasperated sigh. There was a minute or so of chatter as he obviously conveyed his frustrations to Bradley in the living room before the distinct slam of the front door rang out through the rental house. 

You crawled away from the door, unlocking it and peering out into the hallway. Bradley stood at the end of it, arms crossed over his chest. 

“Is he gone?” you asked, pulling yourself to standing, arm shaky as you braced yourself against the doorway. 

He nodded. “Yeah.” 

“Good.” You walked out into the living room and made your way into the kitchen, grabbing for a wine glass and the bottle of white that sat out on the counter, splashing some into the glass and downing it in a single gulp. Bradley followed you wordlessly into the kitchen. 

“You gonna tell me what happened, Ace?” 

“What did he tell you?” you asked, turning toward him. He looked good, wearing a tight black shirt that accentuated his broad shoulders and a pair of athletic shorts that ended higher on the thighs than you’d expect. 

Bradley shook his head. “Not going to play games with you tonight, Y/N. He’s my best friend and you’re his girlfriend.”

“I thought I was your best friend, too,” you whispered, looking up at him through your lashes. “Or did that stop when we slept together?” 

Bradley paled. It had been almost two years since that night in New Orleans, but he still thought about it every time he reached down and tugged on his cock, bringing himself to orgasm thinking of the way your face had contorted as he slid inside of you. It was torture listening to you make love with Jeremy in the room next to his when he knew exactly what sounds could be dripping out of your mouth, if it was his bed you were in. 

“Shit, I’m sorry,” you said softly, shaking your head. “I shouldn’t have said that.” 

The two of you had never talked about New Orleans again. It was an agreement. Practically law. The two of you could only exist if you refused to ever bring it up again. 

Bradley crossed his arms over his chest. 

“He’s going to the bar,” he said after a moment. “Not sure how long he’ll be gone. That’s all he told me.” 

You poured yourself another glass of wine and brushed past Bradley into the living room, settling down on the couch. “He doesn’t listen to me,” you muttered. “He loves to hear himself. He thinks he’s God sometimes and I swear, I don’t know whether or not he even realizes I’m there half the time.” 

Bradley took a seat on the ottoman in front of the couch, leaning his elbows against his legs, thighs spread wide. “He loves you, Ace.” 

You raised your eyes to his, filled with tears. “Sometimes love isn’t enough, Bradley. Two people can love each other but not be right for each other.” 

He looked at you with a grimace. “I know that.” 

Of course he did. He loved you. He had always loved you. But he had also convinced himself he wasn’t right for you.  

What if he was wrong? 

“What am I doing?” you whispered. 

You had moved to Pensacola a year ago, after your MBA program at Georgetown ended. You had given up your dreams to follow Bradley and Jeremy as they moved from base to base. They had just gotten the call that their next assignment was Lemoore. You had accepted a six-month placement with a firm in Atlanta that would overlap with their first few months in California. You were still young, only twenty five, but you wanted clarity. You wanted a promise that Jeremy wasn’t willing to give you. 

That was the fight. You wanted the promise of a ring when you joined him in Lemoore. He hadn’t been sure. After four years, he still wasn’t sure. 

“You’re doing your best, Ace,” Bradley said quietly. “It’s all any of us can do.” 

“He doesn’t want to marry me,” you cried. “He said he’s not ready. That he’s not sure.” You raised your eyes to his. “Why isn’t he sure?” 

“Honey.” 

You shook your head. “He should be sure, right? That’s a red flag, right? If he loved me, he’d want to marry me.” 

“Y/N, it’s not that simple,” Bradley said, leaning forward and taking your hands into his. You tipped your head to the side, sniffling. Bradley reached one hand up and cupped your chin, tilting it up, forcing you to look at him. “Jer loves you. But he’s just scared. You’re not like him. You’re a planner. You know what you want and you go after it immediately. Jeremy? He needs more time on things. Remember how long it took him to pick out his truck?” 

You laughed. The three of you had spent five weekends in a row at the car dealership until finally you tossed your hands in the air in exasperation. Get the damn car, Jer! you had shouted. In the end, he walked away with the exact one the three of you had decided was best before you even stepped foot on the lot. 

Bradley was right. Jeremy needed time. He wasn’t a risk taker. He wasn’t quick to make decisions. But he was practical and he was strong and he held you together when you felt like falling apart. 

He was all of the things that Bradley wasn’t. 

And Bradley was all of the things Jeremy lacked. 

You needed them. Both of them. 

You could hear the musicians playing. The doors to the ballroom were closed. You had opted not to have Anna and Bradley walk down the aisle as bridesmaid and groomsman. They were already at the altar, waiting. 

With Jeremy. 

Your father looked down at you with a smile. “Are you ready princess?” 

You gripped your bouquet in one hand, your father’s arm supporting you on the other side. 

You looked up at him with a nod and the wedding planner tossed open the doors. Everyone rose to their feet but you couldn’t focus on anyone except the two guys at the front of the room. 

Bradley and Jeremy stood so close they were almost touching. You took in Jeremy’s dark hair, slicked back in a perfect coif, bright white smile, hazel eyes sweeping over you. 

Behind him was Bradley. You could feel the weight of his stare from the end of the aisle. 

You tightened your grip on your father’s arm. It was like you were floating toward them. 

Both of them. 

Your mouth was open in shock. “What did you just say?” 

“Does he make you as happy as I would make you?” 

You felt the tears start to stream down your face. “Bradley, don’t do this,” you begged. “Not now, not tonight.” 

“If not tonight then when, Y/N?” he demanded, fingers gripping your arms tighter. “I love you and I have always loved you and I promise if you say yes I’ll spend the rest of my life doing anything I can to give you everything you could ever want.” 

“It’s too late!” you sobbed. “I’m getting married tomorrow, Bradley. What about that do you not understand?” 

He backed away. You practically sagged against the wall separating the living room from the bedroom of the suite. His brown eyes were hard, relentless. They never left yours. “You didn’t answer my question, Y/N.” 

You opened your mouth to reply.

“Do you, Y/N, take Jeremy to be your lawfully wedded husband? In sickness and in health, to have and to hold, for better or for worse?” 

You raised your eyes, flooded with tears, over Jeremy’s shoulder. They locked onto Bradley’s chocolatey warm ones. 

He felt his heart speed up in his chest. There was a buzzing, all around him, drowning out all the noise. It was just your eyes on his. Your hands in Jeremy’s. 

He waited. 

He thought back to the way you had smiled at him in that dirty college bar that humid June night. 

He thought about the way you had looked at him in the bridal suite less than twenty-four hours before. 

He thought about the way you smelled as he picked you up at the airport the first time you visited Lemoore. 

He thought about how you had felt under his fingertips in that New Orleans hotel room.

Bradley thought about all of the times he should have told you, but didn’t. He thought about all of the I love yous he had missed out on. The goodnight kisses. The desperate, intimate moans that could have been for him. He thought about how much his mother had loved you. How your laugh sounded like a symphony and the fact that he would fall asleep with a smile on his face if you were just in the house with him, even if it meant you were asleep in Jeremy’s arms. Bradley looked into your eyes and thought about all of the times that you had smiled for him and him alone. He felt his heart catch in his throat. 

A single tear slipped down your cheek. 

“I do,” you whispered. 

The buzzing stopped. Everything was suddenly, overwhelmingly, irrevocably silent. 

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