#...especially because i'm a man (and because people are misogynists who think it's just so funny that women are people)...

[uncanny-tranny]

It's weird how people paint "daddy issues" and even "mommy issues" as, like, a joke or a failure on part of the person who has those issues, rather than recognizing that daddy and mommy issues stem, for so many people, from abuse. What this all is is just abuse apologia, and nobody seems to either notice or maybe even care.

When somebody with daddy or mommy issues opens up about the "why," I can't ever seem to shake the fact that they tend to have gone through a ton of abuse and bullshit as a child. It's just crazy that other people would look at that and see a joke or a failure of the once-child who was abused.

[here-there-were-dragons]

my mother is absolutely convinced of some nonsense conspiracy theory that (in her words) "originally humanity lived in peaceful all-woman societies of goddess worshippers who took care of eachother and lived in harmony, while males were roving loners that had no society and never cooperated. that changed when the men banded together and overthrew the peaceful woman-dominated societies, and enslaved us all." and, according to her, this is proof that a woman-dominated world would be innately more peaceful, and that men are innately violent and evil and should be either barred from holding any legal power or leadership roles or at least should be (again in her words) "gelded like bulls" to remove their testosterone before even being considered for such a thing.

she also evidently believes that the problem with all religions today is primarily that they aren't "goddess worshippers", because she seems to think goddess religions are inherently peaceful and pure too and seems to be especially obsessed with "Isis" in particular. the very very few times she's openly considered it unambiguously bad for some population or another to have been exterminated (she's got a bad case of devil's advocating genocide brain), she's gone out of her way to make up some crap about how said people were a peaceful society of goddess-worshippers, almost always of isis. delusions of isis-worship seem to be the only thing that ever causes her to consider any arab or middle-eastern culture, society, or ethnicity to be relatively uncomplicatedly undeserving of extermination, in fact, because every fucking time she doesn't immediately start devils-advocating it and making remarks about how "the rest of the world should box them in and let them blow eachother up" it's when she's whinging on about how whatever specific micro-ethnicity she's thinking about are or were traditional persecuted isis-worshippers.

the sole major exception to her weird fixation on isis worship justifying worthiness of life is the whole israel thing going on, in which she has consistently made very obvious that literally the only reason she's against the genocide of palestine is because it gives her an excuse to even more openly hate jewish people than she already did. and honestly i'm not sure even that's true because i think she's made some offhand remarks about palestinians having probably been peaceful isis worshipers before the jews infected them with christianity or something anyway.

so for the last, however fucking long it's been i've been constantly having to listen to her go off about how this behavior is in the jew's blood or whatever and that they literally invented all genocide because somehow the concept didn't exist before them and wouldn't have ever been invented by the rest of humanity without those jewish aliens dropping it in i fucking guess apparently and she furthermore goes on about how every single genocide and mass-oppression movement in history is directly inspired by them, ESPECIALLY the nazis, and THEN i have to listen to her rant about how, basically, wwii was something they entirely brought on themselves by "dominating the economy and treating everyone not them like shit" and the nazis were just "using their own tactics back at them". and then she goes on a rant about how the people the original jews exterminated back in the day (aka the first ever genocide, which they invented, because jews invented genocide and hate according to her) in the middle east region were peaceful matriarchal isis-worshipers.

and then she starts making comments about arabs being backwards and palestinians either being mysogynist muslims that should be boxed in to blow eachother up with everyone else or secret peaceful isis worshippers corrupted by men's cruel hand, sometimes in the same sentence, entirely dependent on which group she's more in the mood to hate at the time.

it's exhausting. beyond exhausting. her sole purpose in existence seems to be to have the singularly most exhausting set of politics physically possible to fit into one person.

just, sometimes i think, if there really is anything at all to the incredibly stupid and inexplicably popular idea that anyone or anything has a Purpose tm to exist for, i feel like my mother's purpose is to be walking proof to me of a Type Of Guy That Is Real, cause i sure as fuck would have trouble inventing this mess if it wasn't standing right in front of me spewing confusingly bipartisan hate. all of her thoughts and opinions are these long winding nonsense chains that feel like if that man carrying thing sketch about the friend with confusing politics was a person. on meth.

[nightmarish-fallen-angel]

There's something especially biting about people telling transmascs specifically to unpack their misogyny.

After so long of being yelled at or berated by my mother. Looked at with disgust for not shaving my legs and yelled at when I cut my hair, guilt tripped into wearing makeup, and being told any masculine dress was "not socially acceptable." All things that actively hurt gnc women as well as trans people. All things that are misogynistic to imply women have to do.

Every time I try to come out as trans: "I wish you weren't ashamed of your femininity, I'm so heartbroken that you hate women. You're only trying to become a man because you think women are inferior." Following it up with a "why can't you express yourself as you are and just be a gnc woman..." As if she didn't just mock me for those exact traits.

My mother, and by extension TERFs (as my mother is one), constantly imply that the only reason transmasculine people exist is because they are poor little girls who struggle with internalized misogyny. They need to embrace being the gnc women they truly are~ And the gnc women need to fix their internalized misogyny by being more feminine~

So imagine my frustration when the communities I assume to be safe for trans people (both irl and online) hit me with the "transmascs need to unpack their misogyny :/" "a surprising number of transmascs are misogynistic actually :/"

Everyone needs to unpack their misogyny dipshit. The fact that transmascs are singled out specifically leads me to conclude one (or both) of two things:

You have encountered a shitty transmasc person and have taken it upon yourself to decide that the entire transmasc community is like that. I'm not saying misogynistic transmascs don't exist, but if you see someone with a bigoted worldview and go "well this is indicative of the entire community" you are the problem.

You think transmascs are misogynistic for getting gender dysphoria around things that are feminine or conversely, they are misogynistic for getting euphoria around masculinity. This is just straight up punishing trans people for being true to themselves.

Both of these are transphobic arguments and are common TERF tactics to discredit trans people. I do not trust you if you hold the opinion that misogyny is more prevalent in transmasculine spaces than in society at large.

[transfaguette]

the transmasc discourse confuses me a lot... i feel like theoretically a trans man COULD experience male privilege but only if he were to pass well and/or be stealth. so i see it as conditional. but, that also confuses me because by that logic, couldn't any stealth trans person experience cis privilege by passing and hiding their identity? is it privilege if you have to lie for your own safety? would a gay person who never speaks of their identity be able to have straight privilege? i ask these questions genuinely but i feel stupid for not knowing the answers. maybe tumblr is just a bad place to have these discussions in the first place

I think the foundational assumptions we need to reevaluate in this argument are

that the privilege that really matters is not being seen as a man in passing by strangers, but the ability to unconditionally move through the world as a cis person. Like, being a passing trans man doesn't mean much when you are incarcerated or need to seek healthcare or employers do background checks. Maybe a stealth trans man is treated better by his misogynistic boss, but to even be in those career scenarios is way harder to achieve for trans people in general!!!

that experiencing privilege is a bad thing that taints you as a person, which is especially treated as the case primarily for trans people! Fear that trans women "don't know what its like to be a woman" (according to cis womens standards), that certain nonbinary people are too male, that trans men are misogynists. its actually a pretty rancid double standard that isn't applied to perisex cis people, the actual benefactors of that privilege, lol. The stealth trans man in the work place or the trans woman that did not know she was trans for 50 years of her career, are not evil for possibly being given preferential treatment for presenting male. I think thats an extremely bad and individualistic view of privilege and what it actually means, and it's pointless. It just doesn't matter and I see it as an excuse to paint trans people as aggressors. its bad when radfems and transphobes do it and its bad when trans people do it to each other too.

we are talking about male privilege because it's the vocabulary of cis feminism, which is so devoid of the context of trans people lives. What's really relevant when talking about trans people is cis privilege. Because otherwise we fall into the transphobic narrative that trans people get to experience the "best of both worlds" and cis women are the only "true, pure" victims. when obviously the reality is that fundamentally being trans is harder than being a cis woman or man.

anyways. I'm glad you sent this ask because i think about this a lot also.

[genderqueerdykes]

As an AMAB Transmasc who’s also transfem it’s just infuriating that people can be so cruel about us and about AFAB Transfems

as an intersex transfem & transmasc person, i wanted to say from the bottom of my heart that i absolutely despise how people treat you, and AFAB transfems. the entire point of the trans community is that we DON'T CARE about what genitals strangers have or were born with. but instead, we've turned it around and become so obsessed with genitals that we force EACH AND EVERY TRANS PERSON to disclose what genitals they have in order to be "allowed" to identify as trans.

like think about it. i was assigned male at birth. then my biological sex marker was switched to female, and i was forced on estrogen. as someone who realized it was transmasculine first and had to struggle to be seen as masculine and a man, how does your situation offend me at all? you're going through the exact same thing. you don't relate to cis masculinity or manhood. why do i care about what genitals or gender marker you were born with? i was assigned male at birth and identify as transmasc. being intersex is not what gives me "permission" to identify this way.

you're not "stepping on the toes" of AFAB and intersex transmascs. you're showing people that gender is so complicated that even people assigned a gender at birth can be divorced from that gender due to societal or personal factors. people forget that assigned gender at birth doesn't define how that person experiences gender in practice. if you feel that you are transitioning into or have had to transition into masculinity, then i believe you. you are. i don't know what you're experiencing. i have no right to tell you what your experience is. and no one else does, either

people are especially harsh on AFAB transfems because of misogyny. like it all boils down to misogyny. people DESPERATELY want to treat AFAB people like shit for any reason. by any means necessary. and of course, with that person identifying as feminine and/or a woman, that compounds it and makes it worse. people just let their misogyny run free and attack and insult that person and tell them they're too stupid to understand what they're experiencing like. people who behave this way: you're not slick. we can tell that you're wildly misogynistic.

you being transfem shouldn't cancel out your transmasculinity, either. i know people must look at you and just straight up ignore your transmasculinity, but they don't have the right to. you are allowed to be both transmasc and transfem at once, not that you need my permission. i hate that people are forcing you into a position where you can't even express yourself in the queer community without people literally attacking you and forcing you to divulge your assigned gender at birth.

i really need to stress that, again, we are literally the "we don't care what genitals you have/were born with" community... and now people are literally FORCING strangers to divulge what genitals they have. people are NOT concerned about the gendered experience you've gone through growing up. they're concerned about your genitals. and its fucking disgusting. i'm sorry you have to go through this. as an intersex transfemasc person, you have all of my support, and then some. y'all aren't hurting anyone. people are hurting you, and it's fucked that they just don't care.

[dubina-dawkins]

STRESS

~850 words

>After long missions Ben is obviously stressed. What else can you do if not help him?

warnings/notes: smut, minors dni! oral (m receiving), female reader but there aren't many real descriptions other than calling reader a "heroine", no usage of y/n, no proofread I'm gonna die, ben is being canonically really rough, but there's just a bit of his softer side i wish was there in canon so maybe ooc, supe!reader, reader is a second captain of payback (like starlight in the third season but no parallels between starlight & homelander and reader & soldier boy)

REBLOGS WILL BE APPRECIATED!

It hadn't been a hard day, not even a hard week, it had been going on for a hell of a long time. Everyone was on edge, even Tessa and Tommy were exhausted, and if all those missions, he filming of that stupid movie Legend had insisted on, could exhaust the twins, whose energy had always burned like dynamite, pun intended, then obviously no one had any energy at all.

People deal with stress in different ways. Some people try to abstract themselves from society - that's what Mindstorm did, and something in you told him that if he missed one more training session, then as soon as his coat even looms in Soldier Boy's peripheral vision, Dan would be dead.

Some were trying to forget themselves in training, and some were trying to beat the crap out of them in training. And you, as co-captain of this incorrigible team, as a supe who still had some humanity left in her, it was unbearably painful to watch Ben take it out on the others. But not at you, of course. Of course not at you, you were fucking special.

For instance, you were special when you sat between his legs in the meeting room.

No, don't think anything terrible, Ben wasn't the kind of man who would force a woman to do something like that, after all, he may have been a bastard, a misogynist and...a lot of other bad things, but he was a real man of his time - or at least he thought he was. In his opinion, it was much more manly to get a woman to fall at his feet - in this case, literally.

No, it's just that after he almost smashed Black Noir's head on the table during today's meeting, you had no doubt that he could use some stress relief.

And who, if not the second captain of the Payback, America's No. 1 heroine, on a par with the Statue of Liberty, could help him, America's greatest hero, become even a little more forgiving? The answer was obvious: no one. Did you do it out of fear, Stockholm syndrome, or because the only humanity left in you somehow cherished the bastard? It wasn't that important. Not now, anyway.

Not when his big hand was clutching your hair, painfully pulling back and literally slamming your head into his lap again and again. His cock slammed into your throat with a sharp and tremendous pressure, and somewhere through the veil of your own pleasure in the process you could hear his absolutely animalistic growl. Well, knowing that you could bring him to such a primitive state fueled so much pride in your chest that you obviously grew bolder.

You could grip his shaft lightly with your teeth, which made your hair pull back especially hard, forcing you to let go of his length from your mouth. You only laughed, and Ben only feigned annoyance.

And just a few moments after that, he's back to exhaling your name gutturally, stretching the "r" sound especially hard when he says you're his "good girl". And soon enough, Ben's grip on your curls tightens, and he's moving your head at an unsteady pace in pursuit of his pleasure alone. You suppress your gag reflexes, because to your great surprise, not only he likes it, but you as well. You were definitely a masochist.

His growls, guttural moans, and sloppy grunts mingled with your whimpers and the wet slapping of your face against his heated skin. How strange was it that you were ready to cum now without even touching your needy slit with your fingertips, just from the feel of his huge length in your mouth? It was probably very strange, but you didn't have that thought in your head, or any other, God, Ben had literally fucked the shit out of your brain, because all your sick mind was thinking about was his voice, his face, his hands, just fucking him. Thrust, thrust, another thrust--

He stops abruptly, apparently not wanting to end it like this. Soldier Boy lets go of your hair, pats your head approvingly (a rare sign of tenderness on his part!) and then takes up the locks again to lift your face off his still-hard cock, glistening in a mixture of pre-ejaculate and your saliva. He grins smugly, taking your chin with his finger. Judging by the fact that he's even allowed himself that smirk, some of his stress is already gone. But this is not enough.

"Get up, love. And sit on the table," he growls, lifting you off your lap as you almost hit your head on the edge of the table, and Ben lowers himself to you, pressing his lips dangerously close to yours in a scalding kiss. His lips taste gross, a mixture of expensive whiskey, weed, and smoke, but you grasp the taste with your whole life line. But before you can even open your mouth to his tongue, Ben soon pulls away, biting your bottom lip.

"I'm not going to end this with you so easily."

a/n: of course know this man is huge asshole and i hate him with all of my heart but your honor he's played by jensen ackles so he can be pardoned. idk what was the last time i written smut tbh

[gaytommykinard]

i dont care what canon tries to tell me and i don't care for how other people are trying to analyze 8x06

like I'm not buying into the idea that buck "idolised" his boyfriend and "didn't really know him" if you want me to accept buck has been dating a man for half a year and took no time to think about his own or tommy's identity and labels (yes even if he was to reach the dreaded “i don't care about labels” conclusion because ryan murphy productions are apparently allergic to the word bisexual) we're not going to get along idk

or whatever bullshit it is that buck couldn't say i love you but "rushed" to ask tommy to move in (and the idea that he was "inconsiderate" about tommy's house, sorry but that's literally all fanon, we don't know shit about Tommy's living situation other than that he has a big ass garage apparently. i promise you the writers were throwing "masculine" hobbies at tommy and trying to find common ground between him and eddie, you (we) have spent 6+ months thinking about tommy's house, the writers have spent 0 of that time on it) or that buck wouldn't be understanding of a closeted repressed gay man entering a heterosexual relationship with a woman as either an act of self preservation or succumbing to societal pressures. Michael Grant has been part of the canon storyline since s1. give me a fucking break.

like maybe I'm the only person who doesn't see this narrative as consistent with buck's character especially with the development it has gone through in s6 and s7 (and obviously i was foolish in hoping that canon would follow through with the development and not just uno reverse everything they've spent time setting up in previous seasons).

i feel like i have talked about the tommy side of things and the bottom line is that no matter how much meta we read and write the writing as it was presented to us in the episode is that tommy believes that because he is the first man that buck has dated he won't be his last and that their relationship is doomed because buck thinks everything is "new and exciting" and is essentially treating tommy as a shiny new toy. the only reasonable, plausible explanation for the things tommy said is that he's been in buck's position before and hurt someone he dated when he first came out. but again the writers aren't thinking about it as much as we are.

and while these lines are extremely biphobic, at least you can say it was the writing that was biphobic (just like the misogynist writing in the restaurant scene). you can say tommy was insecure (because he obviously is) so at least it doesn't butcher tommy's character.

buck, on the other hand? i don't know what happened to buck. we know that buck is tuned in to his loved ones’ struggles even when they don't voice them, he's shown this time and time again. he's perceptive and compassionate and non judgemental. buck cares so fucking much. nevermind the inconsistencies in the storytelling from 7x05 to 8x06. ignoring those. but this isn't the character we've seen for 8 seasons.

[tossawary]

I finished Volume 3 of SVSSS, which encompasses the main story, and currently have my bookmark sitting at the first chapter of the Airplane Extras in Volume 4. I took a bunch of quote pics but have yet to review them and add thoughts.

Every time I read SVSSS, I forget how... incredible... the inside of Shen Yuan's head is. He's fascinating.

Like, he's misogynistic (even while criticizing Airplane's own misogynistic writing), he's homophobic, AND he's transphobic. Not in a way where I think he thinks anyone deserves fewer rights than anyone else (I think he's generally a nice person, although, holy shit, I would not trust this man to craft policy of any kind) or would prevent anyone from living however they chose to live, a lot of his problematic bullshit stays inside his own head as he tries to understand the world around him using the stallion novel formulas he was given, but he's carrying around SO MUCH unexamined bias that supports his refusal to examine himself and his own desires.

Some of it reads (presumably intentionally) a LOT like the kind of conflicting, problematic bullshit a lot of queer people carry around inside their heads as they struggle to untangle themselves and their beliefs.

And while I do wish that Shen Yuan had been forced to confront and address his misogyny and transmisogyny even further than it does come up (in part because it is DEFINITELY affecting the way he thinks about gay men as well, including and especially Binghe), I do kind of... appreciate on some level that he thinks this way? From a character standpoint? Because I think it's probably realistic for a privileged young man spending a lot of time on the internet reading shit like PIDW to look at the world this way. And it's clear even through his own narration that his blindness in certain areas is causing him a lot of trouble. While I do have criticisms and personal wishes, I do appreciate the depiction of personal character development that is just... a cringeworthy mess of internalized bullshit the whole fucking time.

Also, it's SO funny to me that he reads as SO aro-ace-spectrum to me (probably gay, but generally detached from sexuality and possibly also partially from gender) AND he actually knows... the word asexual, I don't think he has a very broad understanding of asexuality... but he knows the word and yet doesn't personally identify that way. He mentally accuses both Luo Binghe (main story, before finding out Binghe is into him) and Liu Qingge (Succubus Extra) of being asexual for showing no interest in women, only to fail to reflect on how he ALSO demonstrably has no lasting personal interest in the women around them, which doesn't read as very genuine to me.

(EDIT: Again, I am not against a bisexual Shen Yuan interpretation either! I am willing to be persuaded by any author who wishes to tell a particular story. But Shen Yuan's attraction towards women often reads personally to me as very shallow and possibly insincere.)

"I willingly read PIDW, that proves I'm straight!" he sincerely thinks to himself, even though his favorite wife is the one without explicit sex scenes and he also admits to skipping over a lot of them.

"I'm able to tell when women are beautiful, that makes me straight!" thinks the guy who mentally censors nudity whenever demon women lose their clothes, and keeps telling us how "the average reader" of PIDW would react to these beautiful women instead of conveying his own attracted reactions. His actual reactions are generally centered on a woman's narrative significance. The only people he personally seems to find attractive are Luo Binghe and maybe Liu Qingge.

Though my interpretation was that he does probably experience sexual arousal and have a sex drive (see his username), which probably helps with his conviction of straightness, I'm not sure that there's any mention of Shen Yuan even masturbating at all in the entire main story of SVSSS? He never tried to hook up with anyone. Sex is apparently not a priority for him.

(EDIT: He does seem to enjoy sex with Binghe in the "Bing-mei vs. Bing-ge" Extra. He loves Binghe and likes the closeness and the physical pleasure. I appreciate the indication that they're working on moving on from the AWFUL intercourse pushed by Xin Mo's possession and possibly also the System's Scenario Pusher.)

And Shen Yuan seems to view women as being and behaving Fundamentally Differently from men and gay men as behaving Fundamentally Differently from straight men (as soon as he learns Binghe is into him, he thinks about how Binghe isn't behaving like the characters in his sister's gay, non-con, BDSM erotica novels), seeing everything through the lens of novel tropes, such that he seems to view sex and sexuality and gender as being deeply mixed with a person's personality. So he can't be a gay man, because he's too "Normal", in his mind at first, because he doesn't behave like his own mental image of "How Gay Men Behave" (or "How Women Behave / A PIDW Wife Behaves"), while also demonstrably not being anything like "the average reader" of PIDW and also apparently not caring too much about his own masculinity? Like, I do think he likes being the gentleman scholar of Qing Jing Peak, he does like appearing dignified and strong and cool, he doesn't like losing, he doesn't really like playing "damsel in distress" roles, and I do think he likes being gallant towards women, but he's not too concerned about seriously competing with figures like Luo Binghe or Liu Qingge? He's happy enough to back down and let someone else take the lead if necessary. He puts up with being put into the roles of female leads even if it embarrasses him and he rolls with the punches to his pride easily enough. He seems to have decided his Sexuality By Default, so it does make me have a lot of thoughts about whether or not he's potentially going with Gender By Default / Convenience as well.

Someone get this man some amateur and academic literature on gender and sexuality (and a lot of other stuff), stat, so he can ignore it, probably.

[hotchtits]

hotch and elle and the killing of their respective 'main' unsubs

if i see one more fucking person say

"oh its so unfair that elle got fired for killing a guy when hotch literally did the same thing and everyone praised him for it"

i think i just might lose it

lets break this down and actually think critically about this

when hotch literally did the same thing

wrong!! what did hotch actually do?

hunted down an escaped (after being arrested and identified) and prolific serial killer that had assaulted him in his own home and targeted his family

listened to said serial killer murder his wife over the phone

entered a literal fight to the death with the serial killer where he had to beat him to death with his bare hands because otherwise both him and his son would have been murdered next

it was self defense. pure and simple. he had no gun, no weapon other than his hands and he knew that if he stepped away, it would be over. there is quite literally nothing else could have done.

what did elle do?

hunted down an uncharged and unconfirmed suspect

tried to provoke him into attacking her

when that didn't work, shot him and planted evidence as well as lie about what happened when the police arrived

did the guy deserve it? absolutely. he was a scumbag and a rapist and deserved to die. but the show makes her actions inexcusable for a reason. you cannot do that as a law enforcement officer. you cannot go and shoot someone who is not actively threatening you, especially not without evidence. additionally, the reason he was uncharged was because she panicked during the undercover mission.

i agree that she definitely wasn't ready for it, and that someone else should have been the bait but she was asked and she confirmed that she would be okay.

"but they should have realised that she would have panicked" why? up until that point, she had been a brilliant agent and had never given any indication that she might not be able to do it. again, she told both hotch and gideon that she'd be fine. why would they doubt her? she's good at her job.

everyone praised him for it

also wrong!! emily and rossi look at him in nothing short of horror when they run in to find him beating foyet to a pulp. even morgan, while comforting him, is obviously disturbed by the scene.

hotch and his team also faced a hearing about the aftermath of the case. it didnt matter that foyet had been stopped and that he and his son were safe, he still had to justify every single action he took.

there's another counterargument here that "well they might not have praised him for it but they understood why he did it" and... yeah? again, self defense.

anyway. this is one of those topics that makes my blood boil. i love elle. do i think they way they never brought her up again was unfair? yes. do i think that the way she suffered because of a choice gideon made was unfair? yes. was she wrong for shooting that guy? honestly i'm kind of glad she did.

but im sick of people saying that their circumstances were the same because they weren't.

people also love to cite misogyny here and while CM has a fair amount of it (dont get me started on the treatment of paget and aj) its not fucking misogynistic to recognize that what elle did was illegal and hotch didn't "get a pass" for what he did just because "hes a man"

TLDR: stop comparing elle and hotch's situations with the intention of pointing out the inequality of their treatments because their situations were in no way comparable.

[lgbtlunaverse]

For all the discourse and sordid history of feminine clothes in period fiction or period-inspired fantasy and action stories– from endless misconceptions about corsets to the backlash where people will now complain if a female character has anything negative to say about skirts– I'm still starved for a character that crossdresses because she actually likes the way men's clothes look.

Like. In basically all the cases I've seen over the years, the reasons given for the characters' distate for feminine fashion are purely practical. "Corsets are restrictive, you can't move freely in skirts, feminine fashion is all form no function!"

And while writers often get it wrong and exaggerate how uncomfortable these clothes really were to a sometimes comical degree– you know what? Sometimes it's true! Cycling in a skirt is hard and inconvenient which is why victorian women started wearing split skirts or cycling breeches. (Which was hugely controversial to the men of the time) But like... that was, in fact, feminine fashion. Female cyclists weren't dressing like men they were just wearing a new kind of women's fashion.

Indeed, none of these characters seem to actually like masculine clothes, they give the impression that what they really want to wear is... modern women's fashion. (Which is why this kind of writing often feels anachronistic)

More than that, there is the underlying assumption that while historical women's fashion is governed by aesthetic, men's fashion is governed by use. Caring about how you look is a silly girl thing, unlike rational men who only care whether something works! Which is just... complete horse shit. Men care a lot about how they look, always have, and most masculine fashion trends cannot be explained by practicality any more than women's fashion can. It's a complete lie, based in misogynistic gender roles, that I wish wasn't repeated by media trying to be feminist. (Especially since these heroines always just happen to still be conventionally attractive– and, surprise, feminine– because everyone wants a woman who doesn't care if she's beautiful, but no one wants a woman who... actually isn't beautiful.)

If you talk to any real life butch, they love the way masculinity looks. They think they look hot! They think other butches look hot! There is a real love for masculine style there, that's just completely fucking... absent in most fiction. Because caring about your appearance a feminine trait, duh 🙄

There's an article I love in dressing dykes about Anne Lister, a real life historcial butch. And the way she incorporated masculine fashion didn't involve pants at all. It was in things like leather straps on her umbrella (customary only for gentlemen at the time) wearing men's braces, and dressing entirely in black as was fashionable for menswear but not womenswear. All of these are stylistic decisions. She did it because she liked masculinity.

If all your medieval-inspired fantasy heroine wants is practicality she'd probably start by mimicking the style of working class women. Because you know. Women worked. Women have always worked. And so they had to wear clothes suited for manual labour. There's a lot of interesting things you can do with class there, and she probably will be accused of being 'unladylike' by her environment anyway! But if she's gonna wear men's clothes, please consider letting her like them.

I'm just want an actual goddamn butch main character (or even a genuinely masc straight girl) and I'm tired of repeating the myth that men's clothes are these neutral canvasses of practical use with zero elements of style. (I have eyes! I can see that that's untrue!) Or that it's preposterous that a woman might... genuinely like these stylistic elements. That she might want to look like a man.

[verdantwyrm]

I recently saw an anti-Curlya fanart on Twitter where the idea was that Curly would never prioritize Anya's well-being regardless of whether Jimmy was there or not. The funny thing is that afterwards the person put a disclaimer saying ""I have nothing against the ship or those who ship it, BUT....". It's funny to say that after getting a bunch of people together to talk in a passive-aggressive way about the ship, the people who like it and even about heterosexual relationships in general.

If you dislike and are bothered so much by a ship, why interact with their community? I blocked the artist but I wonder, why, dude?

Oh I'm pretty sure I saw that one too. It's a real issue especially with those people that are so completely 100% convinced that every single man is the exact same towards women or in general with casual misogyny. And it's even worse with Curly, when we see him immediately prioritise Anya once he learns about what happens, he doesn't bother her about the gun anymore and reassures her constantly that they're going to fix this together.

I think it's personally fine to not like men, a lesbian's standpoint is obvious "of course we don't like men" but unnecessarily hating them for no reason and being extremely dismissive or cruel towards isn't going fto fix the patriarchy or unrape women and at the end of the day its just extremely redundant.

You could say that Curly has moments of casual misogyny, I wouldn't, but you're allowed to say that he does. But I don't think he is an offender, nor a problem. So seeing people make him out to be just like Jimmy (or worse in some cases) is one hell of a character assassination.

People choose to interact purposefully with the things they don't like because they're inflammatory and hateful, and then going as far to say "I have nothing against the ship, but" is redundant and ridiculously fucking stupid. It's fine you don't like the ship! If you want to have a headcanon that Curly is a raging misogynistic creep, sure! whatever! Just keep it a million miles away from me and the actual canon of the story, please and thanks.

I'm not going to say that people are discriminatory or oppressive towards Heterosexual ships because thats just not true, but it starts getting a bit uncomfortable if you're one of the people that constantly complain and hate on Het ships and the people that actually ship them. That's just a really dick thing to do and makes you look like a child.

[pawberri]

thank you for all the posts you've made, your takes are always so refreshing to hear.

I want to know your thoughts (if it's okay with you, you can also totally ignore this) about all the "men hate" I see online. like I (poc transmasc non-passing) get it, there are genuine societal gender problems. transmisogyny does exist-women face more challenges than men do. but it genuinely hurts when women, especially trans women, think it's funny/quirky to call men trash or say they want all men dead or whatever. idk I just am hoping someone else understands, you know?

There's a lot of nuances to this question. First, I just want to caution against focusing too much on trans girls as the perpetrators of this. A lot of the asks I get from trans men seem to really fixate on trans women as the perpetrators of hard line gender essentialism. I really think trans girls are not the main people we should be focusing on here. If a trans woman is saying this stuff, take the time to analyze her ideology outside of that pithy comment and consider how much trauma and how little power she has in the world. That said, trans women are affected by this kind of ideology just like us, and they rarely have the power to wield it against others in the way cis people can. I know it hurts to feel isolated by your own community, but that kinda gets into my second point.

Part of dealing with this is learning an impulse progressive cishet dude have had to get used to over the decade. Sometimes, "men are trash" or even "kill all men" are not literal phrases. They are things women say when they're in the throes of trauma to vent their frustration. "Men are trash" in particular is generally pretty lighthearted and used to complain when you have a bad date or something. You have to get used to analyzing what someone actually means and airing on the side of empathy. You, as a man, are the one with some amount of systemic power over that woman, so you are the one who needs to prove you are dedicated to not being a misogynist. The same thing happens when my friends say they hate white people. I have to assume they don't hate me given that I'm their friend, but that I still have some of the negative traits of whiteness. I need to care enough to be a good friend by being anti-racist and checking myself on my behavior. I need to be willing to prioritize their comfort over mine. That includes not becoming this meme:

Now that that's established, there ARE times when "all men are evil and should die" is an actual ideology. It's an ideology that hurts tons of minority groups before it hurts the most powerful, but it's also not really great if we assume it only hurts cishet white guys. Following it to its logical conclusion, it just proposes a reversal of oppression dynamics. This gender essentialism is a key part of radical feminism, trans exclusionary or not, but it leaks out of that community to general feminism all the time.

As a young person on Tumblr and Twitter, this deeply affected me. I internalized the idea that you can "just be a girl." It was repeated by some trans girls, but also a LOT of TME people. It was framed as trans inclusive, but it's trans inclusive in the way "political lesbianism" is lesbian positive. It posits gender as a moral choice that is completely up to the individual and unrelated to biology. It's the lazy version of "gender is a social construct." I felt sick and disgusting for wanting to be a boy because tons of well-meaning friends of mine had made it clear that "being a boy" was a choice, and it was the wrong one. "Boy" was a social category that could and should eventually be eradicated. Trans women were conditionally supported because they, in theory, made this future possible. This didn't amount to actual support, of course. It was an ideology mostly spread by afab queer people that mostly benefited afab queer people. There were a few trans girls who spread it, maybe some due to genuinely believing in the ideology and some due to social pressure, but there were also a lot of people straight-up grifting as trans girls who used this thinking to feel powerful in a niche community of teens. Remember fucking Yandere Bitch Club???

At a certain point, I genuinely thought of being a man as an unambiguous moral failing, and I lashed out at out trans men because of it. I wanted to feel powerful, and here was a type of man in my community I could shame and exclude. I still feel bad for making a bunch of ~girls only~ stuff in HS that excluded the one out trans dude at our school, my friend, because he was just a ~binary man~ and leaving him with no friends and no community. I treated transphobia like it wasn't a real oppression on its own and, in doing so, perpetuated transphobia. It happens a lot.

I wasn't really able to accept that there was nuance to the concept of manhood until I read this article while struggling to accept my own gender:

This is a pretty seminal piece of writing. It has its flaws, of course, but the empathy and intersectionality it highlights was life-changing. It also shows that this kind of thinking is largely perpetuated by TME people and hurts trans women greatly.

Gender essentialism is a bad ideology, it's a transphobic, transmisogynist, racist, etc etc ideology. It's literally essential to patriarchy. But it's also very easy to repackage into leftism and easy to dogwhistle. As a result, it's natural to be hesitant when you see someone saying they hate all men, but you have to tread extremely lightly and actually care what they're attempting to express. Because, yeah, men as a social class still hold power over women. They still have reason to fear and hate men.

I'm writing a comic about this stuff, actually, so look out for it in the future..........

[luthordamnvers]

I still think I need to watch the entire show again, but I'm gonna try and collect some very scattered thoughts because the ~discourse is appalling, tbh.

Idk who needs to hear this, but every single marvel project has been about the widening of the marvel cinematic universe. And it's fucking insane, that people are reducing this show as "just a way to get Wiccan" when it was so much more, especially for a show that wasn't even supposed to exist. It was a show spearheaded by a showrunner who initially pitched it because she loved Agatha, and Kathryn's portrayal of Agatha. One that happens to be a woman, btw (one that happens to had been at the forefront of both Captain Marvel [Uncredited] and been responsible for the first past of Black Widow [Story by, credits]).

Don't get me wrong, the MCU certainly has misogynistic undertones, the fact that we had to wait to have a woman led movie, or a movie director, as long as we did is a travesty. That without even going into the intersectionality that we are still missing in the wider MCU. And one that's inherent in the comic book world, if we are being honest. But guess what, THIS is the type of show that changes that narrative.

The fact that wandavision is still regarded the best Marvel-Disney+ show. So good that got an spin off focused on "a nanny". Show that delivered on a show being about her, and yet not the entire story, with outstanding narrative, direction and storytelling. And some swats of fandom are diminishing it left and right. The dudebros because it was about a woman, about a middle-aged woman, about a queer middle-aged woman. And others in the fandom because it wasn't as queer as they wanted, or focused on what they wanted.

And let's be honest, I'm amazed the show was as unapologetically and canonically queer as it was. Thanks to the efforts of Jac, Kathryn and the team behind it.

Agatha is based on a character that's been around for 50 years, and has being nothing but a nanny/governess for superpowered kids because she happens to be a witch, until relatively recently. Even when we had had part of her back story for decades, she was never that important, and she isn't even evil. Dare I say, she hasn't been that relevant until her run with the Scarlet Witch, and Kathryn Hanh's interpretation of her.

Agatha All Along, is not only an spin off of Wandavision, but also part 2 of the whole story. OF COURSE, Billy would be a very important part of her story, something that was touched upon in WV, but was also part of her (and I'm using this word very loosely) redemption arc.

She shared a kinship with Billy in WV, because he was magick. She wanted to understand how he worked, because she knew what Wanda did, and she wanted Wanda's powers. The fact that she could identify Billy immediately, even when she hoped it was Nicky, was important, but people were to busy whining about Billy having an episode. One episode that was also relevant to the ending of the show. And the full arc of the saga's mythology.

Is the show perfect? Not at all. Did I enjoy the heck out of it and can appreciate what it actually did? Absolutely yes. Can I appreciate how GOOD it was at storytelling? Hell yes.

It was a show absolutely centered in women. Good women, bad women, women of color, old women, younger women. The one man was a queer, three-year old in the body of a 16 year old. And mind you, this character has been making queer history, since his very recent creation (2005). This show is unapologetically queer, we had a huge ass Trans flag that said Protect trans kid in huge black letters being very prominent in the shots. It's HUGE, and not even by marvel/disney standards. The show had nothing to do with coming out, or acceptance, or people dealing with phobia. It was about queer people existing and being queer. Hell, you could make a case that they were saying "being a witch" is an allegory of being queer.

Every single member of the coven could be queer. They hinted at it with Jen, at the very least.

Let's talk about the rest of the coven. Who for me were the absolute highlight of the show.

Alice, generational trauma, the protection witch. The most tragic to me. She saw her curse, as a lie. As something her mother made to neglect her. And yet she couldn't keep a job, she resented her mother, and she had to be reminded of her every moment because her mom was a famous Rockstar. She goes to the road, she comes to terms with her mom's love for her, how her mom's version of the ballad was a protection spell, as much as Alice hated it, and she manages to defeat her curse. She protects her coven. Only to immediately die. Her dialogue with Death was devastating:

Alice: That's it? That's all the... That's all the time I get? Death: If I had a nickel... Alice: This can't be the end. It has to be the beginning. I finally broke the curse. I mean, I can really do something with my life now. Death: You're a Protection Witch. Alice: Yeah. Death: You died protecting someone. You ready? Alice: No.

Heart wrenching, unjust, and beautiful.

Lilia, who was plagued by the gift/curse of seeing her and others destiny. Ignoring it for over half her life, staying stagnant, because she was reeling from the fact that she saw the death of her family, her entire coven, she told them and it changed nothing. She was chased out of villages because she could see the tragedies coming. Who refused to be with a coven, love a coven because the heartbreak of losing her first was too much. Who decided that cheap tricks, was better than seeing the tragedies coming, and refused her gifts. She hated the appropriation of her culture, but when the time came, she accepted it, and moved on. She goes to the road, and finds her coven. "I needed you, my coven." And she died, going back to the start, because she'd rather relieve it all again, the good, the bad and the ugly, that keep neglenting herself. "I loved being a witch".

That without going into the absolute masterpiece that was episode 7. Pulling a non-linear story, as solidly as they did, is certainly not easy. And they did it, beautifully.

Jennifer, who was magick-bound for over a century, to the point that she doubted her knowledge and herself. And yet she made a name for herself, she was a successful entrepreneur (she cheated a little, but you know capitalism is the true villain here). A black woman who was outstanding at her craft, healing and being a midwife, to the point that she became an inconvenience to the fragile, egomaniacal, white men in the medical field. Where they sought out a way to stop her indefinitely. And yet she kept going, and survived. Even at the end of the road. She looked at the person who bound her, and said: "I deny your power over me. You hold nothing." And she unbounded herself, and got out. Not because of Billy or even Agatha but in spite of her. Jennifer survived, just like she has been doing for however many centuries, and she flew towards the sunset. Because 'She's the path ahead'. The growth she had, from being selfish the first few episodes, because that's how she survived, to screaming for Lilia when she decided to stay behind. Jennifer clawed her way out of the road, the bound. And she deserved it.

As for Billy... he's so much like her mother. He accidentally created the road, because he's equally, if not more, unaware of his powers as Wanda. Wanda at least thought she got powers from Hydra's experimentation. Billy isn't even supposed to exist. Billy who was "10 years old" but, realistically like 2 weeks old. Who got thrown into the body of this guy, who he doesn't know, and who doesn't even knows himself, because he doesn't remembers, with powers he doesn't quite understands and then he starts piercing moments of his life together, because he feels this massive hole in his being. And finds his answers on Agatha. He truly believes the road is real, that can take him to someone who while not have the answers, might feel the same way as him. Who was his other half, he doesn't remembers it, but he feels it.

His magick, is like Wanda's, Chaos magick, it manifests without his real knowledge or intention, but by his feelings. He created the road, with all the knowledge he thought he had, the road follows the rules Agatha and Nicky created when they made the ballad. Even if he doesn't know it.

Is the show about Billy? Not necessarily. Billy is important to Agatha, because Billy is Agatha's son now. Not by blood, not even by magic, but by choice. As much as she denies it, her "calculated risk", had something to do in the way she saw Billy, and how she wanted to protect him, in a way she couldn't protect Nicky.

And finally, Agatha. Agatha who built a reputation of killing all her covens. Starting with her mother's. Because her mother sentenced her to death, because she was born evil. And she took that and ran with it. She connived, and betrayed, but she survived, something she's extremely proud of. Do I wish we had seen more of her past? 100%. I wanted to know how she got the Darkhold, how she actually met Rio, how they fell in love. Does not really knowing diminish her storyline? Not at all. Because what we got was really nuanced, and it's going down the hill with people focusing only in the romantic relationship aspect. If anything, I think this is being reductive of Agatha, not Billy. The fact that she needs the love interest for people to focus on her, regardless if that love interest is a man or a woman.

But even then, what did people think it would happen? Agatha Harkness had a romantic relationship with Death itself. It was never going to be a romance, it was always a tragedy. Death who took her son away, Death who gave her time with her son, but never specify how much time. Who then followed her around, torturing her with its presence, and we know Agatha is resentful and can hold a grudge.

Death who kindly stopped for her.

Rio knew Agatha would always resent her, even when she gave Nicky more time, because at the end of the day, she would always had to take him away. As much as it was a kindness to let him be born, to take him while he and Agatha were asleep. She had to take him anyways, and Agatha would never forgive her.

Agatha letting the witchfolk think that she exchanged her son for the Darkhold, or made a deal with Mephisto, and saying it was because "the truth was much worse" had nothing to do with *our* perception of worse. But hers. A powerful witch who couldn't save her son, a woman who couldn't keep her son alive. A witch who let her lover take her son away. Using her son to lure more witches. Then using the song, that her son lovingly created for themselves, to lure even more witches to their doom, just for her to be more powerful and keep living (and potentially still looking relatively young). A song that was special to them, corrupted, because she wanted more power and killing witches, something she knew Nicky didn't like. Witchfolk thinking Agatha got the Darkhold trading her son, was better than what she thought of herself.

She saw Nicky in Billy, how he didn't like killing witches (as accidentally as Billy did), how he mourned, how he somehow still believed in Agatha, even with his barbs at her.

She sacrificed herself, not necessarily because of Billy. But because of Nicky, her boy she couldn't save. And yet here is another boy she loved, not the same but very similarly, one she could save.

Billy didn't manipulate her, (and even if he were to, Agatha would probably be proud of him for that) he's been consistent in wanting to understand Agatha. He's curious. Hell, he didn't even need to come back for Agatha, he had gotten out (wherever out was for him) but he came back, because he cared about Agatha. And if some people can't see that, because he happens to be a he... well, no matter what had happened in the show, those people wouldn't see it any other way.

Agatha becoming a ghost, and immediately seeking Billy, because she loves him, and she likes the way he sees her, not good or innocent, but knowledgeable, and with the potential to do good. And she sees Nicky in him, and his potential too.

There is so much more analysis, and I might share more thoughts later, but for now, this is it. I still wanted more, Agatha's story with the Darkhold, the Salem seven, more of the coven, yet not necessarily for the show or the episodes to be longer, but I would love to see if they expand on this, on another spinoff.

[zepskies]

Hey Zepskies! I'm a small writer but I'm starting on my ficlet about an oc x ben (soldier boy). I've read so much of your work and just think you are a very talented writer. Do you have any tips on writing ben? it can be vague and I know you're busy so I don't expect a response. :)

Hey there!

First off, welcome and thank you for reading my stories (and for that lovely compliment). 💕

As for your question, writing Soldier Boy (Ben) can be very tricky. It took me a while to fully figure out how to write the character, and I will say, it's a challenge every time I do dive back into this (loveable) asshole.

😂 That said, here are 3 main tips I have for writing his character:

1. Comparable archetypes:

When I started trying to do a character analysis of this guy, I started with who he would've likely looked up to and tried to emulate: Frank Sinatra, Humphrey Bogart, Cary Grant, John Wayne, Indiana Jones, John Winchester, and even Dean Winchester to an extent -- the strong, stoic, man of action archetype.

AKA: The Big Swinging Dick™️ in the Room.

These men are leaders, a "man's man," show no pain, weakness, or vulnerability. (So shove those "soft" emotions down your gullet as much as humanly possible. Real men don't cry, amirite? 🙄)

But the fun thing I find about guys like this is, even though they have a hard shell, being able to pierce the armor somehow and get to the creamy center of their heart can be a very rewarding story indeed.

2. The balance of SB's personality:

Based on what we got in season 3 of The Boys, I find that Soldier Boy's personality is a delicate balance of a few key things:

Arrogant Narcissist: He's a massive ego, selfish with a conflated sense of his own importance. Especially before his capture, he's reached the pinnacle of fame. He's bought into his own hype and the backstory Vought created for him, and he assumes that everyone in his life loves him for it.

As Jensen said of his character in Supes Ain't Always Heroes (check out my review of the book here if you like):

“He’s so fragile and his ego is fragile. Just like Homelander. These bigger-than-life powerful heroes really have a glass jaw… “And everyone walks on eggshells around him [Soldier Boy], and they tell him that they love him, and it’s the same with Homelander. Then when all of a sudden he faces his old team and Crimson Countess says we never loved you, we hated you—that’s a gut punch for him. Because even though on some level he may have known that, he never thought he would hear it. “And he probably propped himself up around trying to believe otherwise, because how can you walk around knowing everyone you’ve ever cared about hates you? It’s too painful.” (191)

Womanizing Misogynist: That entire scene with SB and Grace in Nicaragua tells you all you need to know about how Soldier Boy talks to, treats, and views women. 🙄 Again, he's a narcissist, so he assumes women are going to be into him because he's the world's biggest superhero, because he's handsome, because he's that guy.

The problem is, he is devastatingly handsome and impressive as a superhero. And my headcanon is he can be very charming when he wants to be. Again, using his skills as an actor and channelling that old-world debonair charm to get what he wants. (i.e. Cary Grant, etc.)

Violent and Indifferent to Collateral Damage: This is a key one, because this is part of what makes him different from Homelander. SB is not a psychopath. He doesn't necessarily enjoy hurting people. He just doesn't care about the collateral damage.

He also can't tolerate a perceived slight to his masculinity or status, like when Black Noir tried to rise up in the ranks and come into his own as a movie star. Soldier Boy, in his selfishness, saw that as Noir trying to come for his crown, in a sense, which is why he ultimately showed his mean streak through violence.

When he gets back to the U.S. after escaping Russia, he's on a warpath of vengeance against his team who sold him out, and anyone who gets in his way.

"If they have it coming," he tells Hughie.

3. Soldier Boy is both less and more than what he represents: (AKA: His insecurities)

As we know, Soldier Boy didn't really storm Normandy or fight the Nazis. He falls short of every definition of a hero. However, he's also not just a caricature of toxic masculinity.

Ben has deep-seated insecurities that he buries under all the bravado and the Soldier Boy persona. He was also emotionally abused by his father, who set exacting standards for what it meant to be a man.

It drives Ben to try and prove his worth to his father, though he’s never able to. It fosters the lack of self-worth he feels as he seeks validation through fame and what he believes power to be.

He won’t be one to easily admit he’s wrong, or need help, or express emotions he deems are “soft.” He doesn’t want to look weak or demean himself, let alone be genuinely vulnerable, despite likely wanting that connection with someone.

He uses coping mechanisms like drugs to mask and dull his PTSD, but even in his heyday, I think he drugs and parties hard just to pass the time, and to mask how actually empty he is inside. He has no real love in his life, and no family. It's why he admits to Hughie that he wanted kids. Deep down, he wants a family to fill that void that fame, booze, drugs, and meaningless sex can't fill in his life.

So with all of that flawed, internal mess that is Soldier Boy, the biggest challenge I find as a romance writer is trying to keep all of these aspects of his character, while trying to show the glimmers of the humanity in Ben -- the chink in his armor showing just enough softness to the one person who's brave enough to "try" with him.

That said, I hope all of this helps! 💚

[bitchlesshazard69]

It shouldn't have been Aaron

(To the people that call other people misogynistic/sexist because those other people call out/analyze Aphmau's MCD actions, just leave. This probably isn't for you.)

I want to spread my agenda around and agree with the few people who have said it too. It shouldn't have been Aaron. He had potential, probably. Aphmau doing the deed in the woods with him and then coming back after just to flirt with Laurence was trashy, yes. The entire plotline where Aphmau decides to go and be with Aaron behind Laurence's back after everything is really bad, yes. The part where Aphmau doesn't break it off with Laurence even though that's what she should have done if she wanted to be with Aaron instead of lead him on is more than strange, yes. Of course Aphmau is going to do things that aren't perfect, yes. She might have an explanation as to why she found comfort in Aaron, but not an excuse to the way she did.

But I still find potential in the plot line where she forgets both main love interests, but not with Aaron. Think of someone that has done everything for Aphmau such as Laurence. Someone who's sacrificed so much for her. Think of someone who's shown to give great care to children which Aphmau seemingly finds attractive, like Garroth spending time with Levin. Think of the one person that left their home and sacrificed too much for Aphmau, who gained Aphmau's undying love. The one who Aphmau even said "I love you" too. The one who isn't really looked at enough. Of course it's easy to find a man who looks like they are attracted to Aphmau, simply because she's Aphmau, but this person isn't a man.

It should have been Zoey. Zoey has been a part of Aphmau's life from day one. She has been the other mother, a parent alongside Aphmau. She has been there for people when Aphmau could not. She was Levin and Malachi's mother while Aphmau was experiencing her bane of being Irene. Zoey was supporting Aphmau in so many different ways, and Zoey deserves to be loved by Aphmau because of it. Aphmau would turn hostile if anything happened to Zoey.

Zoey is very similar to Aaron in regards to where they came from. Zoey can never go back to her home, in a sense where she lost her life there as Aaron lost his in his village. Zoey has sacrificed her immortality much like Aaron has sacrificed his life for the gateway to open up to save people in need. They have both been willing to be a part of Aphmau's life in ways of which to care for her and her family and not just that but be a part of it. To have Zoey to have turned out to love Aphmau even through death isn't falling short from Aphmau and Aaron's original plot. Sure, they might not have the shocking "Oh I'm pregnant with their child." Reveal, I still feel like Zoey could've easily replaced Aaron in a more meaningful way that would've grasped more of a hold on viewers attentions because Zoey had something stronger with Aphmau than Aaron ever did.

Aaron and Aphmau may have related to each other about being lords, but Zoey and Aphmau could love each other for being caring about others, especially each other. There could be so many ways to put their relationship. So many dynamics. They had more time together. This instead of the strange man that develops nothing with anyone else other than Aphmau and dies after a few good episodes of him just standing around shirtless...

Just think about it.

[genderqueerdykes]

As a genderqueer trans man, I've met far too many people who make "hating men" their entire fucking personality. And this is from cis radfem women, to trans lesbians, to cis male drag queens, to binary fucking trans men. So many people think "hating men" is how we solve society hating women. It is so not it.

"I hate men" is like people think they're scoring morality brownie points. It shows they've not actually taken any critical thoughts about feminism or the patriarchy. They're like "oh so I say this and people think I'm a good person? Cool then I will say it".

And sure there is nuance. In a lot of cases. But man haters really just cannot be arsed with this level of thinking, huh?

Sorry, I realise this is somewhat angry but! Obviously not aimed at you. Thank you for being so out spoken about this.

thank you so much for sending this i really, really appreciate it. you are so right.

it's literally a personality trait to so many people, it's embarrassing. like it's ACTUALLY embarrassing. people like to say cringe this cringe that. i think man hating, especially as a personality type, is one of the most embarrassing things you can choose to do. like we literally criticize misogynists here, people who genuinely spend tons of time thinking about and finding ways to oppress women. it's great that we talk about this. but making an entire personality type out of hating men isn't helping. it's not gonna make misogynistic men stop being misogynists. there are men who identify as proud misogynists. why is a woman identifying as a proud man hater be any different? same behavior.

"I hate men" is like people think they're scoring morality brownie points. It shows they've not actually taken any critical thoughts about feminism or the patriarchy. They're like "oh so I say this and people think I'm a good person? Cool then I will say it".

EXACTLY. it's virtue signalling. all "i hate men" is is virtue signalling. people trying to show off their peacock feathers to other people who suck up to terfs. they want to look like they're progressive and sound like a "good person". they so desperately want to be a "good queer," but all this is is sucking up to terfs and radfems. it's so painfully obvious that so many people see them as the ones who are "correct". i guarantee you way more people are secret radfems than they let on, or at the very least, parrot their beliefs without realizing. people will do everything in their power to discredit everyone but radfems and transradfems. like why are people so ready and willing to act like they're right about everything despite claiming to hate terfs. seems like a lot of the "i hate terfs" shit on here is also virtue signalling.

like, i'm calling people out for this. i'm so tired of seeing "op hates terfs" "terfs get the FUCK off my blog <3" and shit like that and then the person running the blog openly and giddily talks about how they hate all men. trans men. gay men. bi men. pan men. aro men. ace men. polyamorous men. bigender men. intersex men. gender non conforming men. butch men. genderfluid men. men who are also trans women. okay, well this is terf ideology. are you sure you hate terfs? because i think you're terfs.

like seriously the amount of people on here who literally spend all day sucking up to terfs and trans/radfems and then virtue signal and show off how much they say they hate terfs is staggering. the amount of people on here who proudly and loudly say they hate trans men and mascs with a passion but then turn around and "fuck terfs" is mind numbing. if you act like this, you're terfs. no matter what you think you're doing, you are sucking up to radfems and that's it. that's all you're accomplishing.