#*by today i mean about 2 days ago by now bc i forgot this one in the drafts as usual
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sleepymarmot · 2 years ago
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It’s funny how character concepts come together in your head sometimes.
For a while I’ve had these vague thoughts rotating in the back of my brain:
I have an almost finished Corpo playthrough (20 Int/netrunner, Judy romance, max synergy with Johnny, secret ending + Temperance) and a planned Streetkid (20 Body/melee, Panam romance, tense relationship with Johnny, The Star), but I have no ideas for a Nomad
Nomad + The Star seems too static, and also I would have done both Star-friendly romances by then
Kerry’s cute and probably fun to romance, but some aspects of his personality annoy me and more importantly I’m not very interested in a male V because I like the voice and the looks less and don’t have cool character concepts for him
To stay with Kerry I would need either the secret ending or the Johnny&Rogue quest
If I play the Johnny&Rogue quest and make the final choice as Johnny, I would go for the Path of Glory ending because I don’t want to undo his character development
Rogue’s path → The Sun + Kerry romance would also make sense because Johnny would sacrifice himself to preserve the relationship of his two best friends, right after witnessing the death of his own old flame
But I wasn’t thinking about this actively because I’m too busy trying to complete my original playthrough.
Anyway, today I was going through my song library looking for something to listen to in the background, and clicked on Orville Peck’s cover of Born This Way because Pride Month. Here’s an approximation of the train of thought that followed:
What a good aesthetic. This reminds me of the fancy cowboy boots I like to wear in the game I’m currently playing.
Can I make a whole cosplay-ish outfit in the game?
That would not really fit my female Corpo though... That’d be a whole new character. A guy. A gay guy. And cowboy aesthetic is more Nomad...
WAIT
Sooo, I guess my third V will probably be a fashionable Nomad cowboy who gets the closest thing to his happy ending with Kerry :)
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thursdayinspace · 6 months ago
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20 questions for 20 writers
tagged by @thatfragilecapricorn30 @randomfoggytiger and @baronessblixen thank you!! <3
1. How many works do you have on AO3? 21
2. What’s your total AO3 word count? 70.063 -- this is my new AO3, so that's why it's still so low, haha.
3. What fandoms do you write for? Only X-Files now.
4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos? spectacular (glasses sex!), it's the day the world didn't end, from this morning forward (that makes me so happy), got you covered, wild side
5. Do you respond to comments? yes. if I ever don't, I'm sorry, it's not because i didn't love your comment, but i just don't get around to it right away sometimes. but i try to reply to every single one because i love them all.
6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? ohhh. i don't write super angsty endings . . . I guess mend into pieces bc it's season 2 and they know they're making a mistake, but we all know they'll figure it out eventually, so.
7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? they pretty much all end happily. i'm going to more or less randomly pick five ways to say i love you. because i loved writing that ending.
8. Do you get hate on fics? so, okay. there are two stories here i want to tell from an old fandom. one is funny. one is kind of great, really?
the funny one: i got a looooong comment on a fic, like several paragraphs long, going into great detail about why the fic sucked and why i sucked and why i had personally offended them by writing fic at all. they obvs meant to comment anonymously but forgot to log out. by the time i got to my computer, they had deleted their entire account. of course i had their name in the ao3 email. i laughed so hard at that.
the kind of amazing one: i got a very rude anon on tumblr, and i responded by saying i'd be happy to discuss their criticism, but i wasn't going to have a conversation with a hockey puck with sunglasses, and asked them to come off anon so we could talk. and they did! they showed up in my dms a short while later. we solved nothing and did not part as friends, but i actually have mad respect for that. wherever they are today, i hope they have taken some anger management classes and are doing well!
9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? yeah, i certainly do. idk what kind? the porny kind? lol no i mean it's kind of lame but fun.
10. Do you write crossovers? i wrote a stargate atlantis/firefly crossover centuries ago but that was it. or maybe start trek with sth else, i don't remember.
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? not to my knowledge.
12. Have you ever had a fic translated? i don't think so, no.
13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? yes! it's so much fun and i would do it again.
14. What’s your all-time favorite ship? mulder and scully!
15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? i plan to finish all of them.
16. What are your writing strengths? it used to be dialogue but i don't think it is anymore. idk? i think i can create an atmosphere?
17. What are your writing weaknesses? i tend to repeat myself a lot and then skip over other things completely. i'm not good with transitions between scenes.
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? i haven't done it, but if it would make sense for a fic, i might do it.
19. First fandom you wrote for? stargate atlantis. i was very late to the fanfic party.
20. Favorite fic you’ve written? it's called 'ellipsis' and is still with the beta. but of the ones i've already posted, either from this morning forward or yesterday's future.
Randomfoggytiger added additional questions:
1. Is writing a hobby or way of life? i mean it's a hobby but it's definitely also a way of life. there isn't ever a time when i don't think about writing and everything all the time connects in some way to a thing i'm writing and i can't imagine what i'd do without writing.
2. A journal full of writing notes or a clean, completed manuscript? completed manuscript! or notes? uhh . . . both?
3. Who (or what) is your writing inspiration? everything. random things. i can't think of one specific thing, it can be literally anything.
4.Which is worse: someone you "idolize" reading your first draft or listening to you sing? both thoughts are equally awful lol
5. Has writing from someone else's POV ever changed your own perspective? yeah, i think so. not in any big way, but about smaller stuff, just the way i look at certain things? yes.
6. Tumblr, AO3, LiveJournal, or FFN? ao3!!! my tinkerbell brain loves the comment section, haha. also it's just so much nicer to read on ao3 and there's the download option, so also as a reader, def ao3.
7. AO3 wordcount, and are you satisfied with it? 70.063 - no, i'm not satisfied with it. i used to write multi-chapters with more words. but it's a new account so yeah starting small again.
8. What movie/book/fic gripped you irrevocably? jasper fforde's 'thursday next' series. it's where i stole my name from. literary detectives? oh man. it's the kind of story where you wish you'd had the idea first. go read it!!!!!
9. What's the highest compliment you could ever be given, and have you been given it? i am really really lucky to have been given so many amazing compliments and i appreciate every single one. i couldn't say what means the most to me . . . probably when it's personal to the commenter? when someone tells me sth i've written touched them in some way. bc that's what i want to achieve.
10. What defines your writing style? lol idek man pretentious purple prose? i think i live somewhere between overuse of metaphors and focus on the rhythm of a text. i love writing in english bc it flows so nicely. idk is trying to make it sound nice a style bc then that's at least what i'm going for.
who hasn't been tagged? no pressure tags for @backintimeforstuff @nachosncheezies @actual-changeling and everybody else who wants to!
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deafenedsaltwater · 6 months ago
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Today I woke up at 4am and decided that means its. Time to write a 4x ramble of mainly highlights
Now to copy-paste it here so I can uhhh add to it a bit
More than 14 years ago when the first piece of bfdi/xfohv content was released, 4 and x were the first two to have a spoken interaction. Furthermore, in that educational short film, 4 helped X Find Out His Value, the titular event. Later, upon reintroduction in bfdi/bfb proper, 4 has x be his cohost, which gives us more to go off of for their relationship. Highlights of this include: 4 making it a challenge to cool down x when he was on fire, / 4 speaking in unison with x (subscriber specials + have nots/have cots challenge), / 4 saying, and I quote, "but X is just looking for his treasure! I CAN'T LET THAT HAPPEN BECAUSE I MUST BE X'S ONLY TREASURE ", / in a flashback where x is telling the contestants about 4's love for bfdi, it's shown they lived together or at least spent a lot of time together before the show (also can I say seeing x get sad about 4 running away hit me hard), / 4 sung a cover of "All I Want For Christmas" directed AT X, outright calling him "baby" and telling him he would wait under the mistletoe for him (4X NATIONAL TREASURE HOLY SHIT I LOST IT THE FIRST TIME I HEARD IT), / during Thanks for 800k, they did a parody of Honey I'm Home where the line was unfortunately replaced with "buddy I'm home" (4x disaster. We lost that day), / Cary confirmed that they were not related, and that he "liked the shipping", and "yeah, it's definitely canon" (to some extent. We can assume he didn't mean outright romantically, partial win), / 4 calls x "The best cohost money can buy", (he doesn't pay x), and earlier 4 had said "that's because I'm here! Yeah, I'm thinking of doing standup" in response to someone saying it's hot. X says something affirmative to this, I forget what exactly, but with ambiguity I can assume he meant that 4 is hot and noone can stop me, / 4 reads x's memory to find out who stole donut's diary, and x says "Ok! ...remember to keep my secrets" afterwards, / when bfb split into tpot and bfb, when x left, 4 not only got depressed, but referenced the original XFOHV short by saying "I just don't know what my value is, where my cohost is!" (Evil fucking homewrecker 2 I'll get them I WILL), asks ALL of his remaining contestants to help him get x back, before outright making it the challenge for the episode. When x is returned to 4, 4 says "x! I'm so happy to see you! Are you?" "That depends, how good are you at paddy cake?" "I'm super pro!" "Then I am happy as well!", / they have a lot of hugs, notably the one upon 4's return, and that one that is animated so that they reeaaallly look like they're making out, / I'm running out of notable moments hold on let me go watch a 4x compilation
I'm using masculine pronouns ffor both of them bc that's how they're referred to in the show, but as with all Algebraliens, they're genderless
OK OK I COMPLETELY FORGOT TO TALK ABT X GETTING SAD WHEN 4 ENTERED THE GROUND. Sitting at the exact spot 4 entered the ground for months and watching his 43 imaginary bfdi seasons is so,, I mean all I'm saying is that hurt/comfort goes crazy for them (fanfic reader in me shining through)
AND THE "What do you think of roleplay?" LINE. That whole episode of them swapping appearances was so lovely for subtle 4x dynamic. I want I want more just fluffy moments with them,, just seeing how they banter and bounce off each other is so joyful. I'm a sucker for fluff
Generally X is just such a supportive friend and 4 loves them (Other than the LRC line - I really don't like the Limb Reattachment Center being a possibility even off screen. It messes with my perception of them, and it feels inconsistent with the rest of their relationship throughout the show. Maybe I'm just a massive hater and don't want my vanilla flavor fluffy best friend ships being toxic in some way. 4 screeching adds to this, but lesser as later when x made it a condition of him staying 4 stopped screeching)
4 was proud of x for doing bfb without them. Honestly, my earlier distaste for the LRC thing could be fixed by continued shows of progress in their relationship like this. I will read between all the lines I want to make sense of the behavioral changes, as someone who hasn't watched BFDI content other than all subscriber specials, the pi day massacre, tpot 11, and a 4x compilation. Part of my willingness to somewhat brush past is that 4 and X are very strong/durable people who, as far as we know, could live for eons. Mainly referencing Thanks For 900k's timeskip here. I hope they live forever <3
OHHH THE WHOLE SUBPLOT OF 4 TELLING THE CONTESTANTS TO RESPECT X'S ALOE VERA,, I mean, it's a subplot that leads into x catching on fire which leads to th e challenge being first to cool him down then to do something to help his aloe vera grow. But it was great. "If X says there are points, there are points" ...lovely
X offering 4 a juicebox when they feel bad <3
I hope these two title screens speak to their relationship, and my perception of them
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irisxstardust · 2 years ago
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1 | Shut Up
SUMMARY: You and Ellie used to be friends until one day when she decided she was done. You hadn't spoken to her since and now, five years later, you are given the unfortunate task of going on patrol with the girl. A little argument and one stalker later, you're playing her hero. But is it enough to repair the damage made to your relationship all those years ago?
A/N: wowzers. ive spent like two weeks going back and forth on this piece bc UGH i want to get into the cutie stuff but i like want that angst and slow burn yk. and i also want it to be good like this is my first real tumblr post and yall are such good writers ive got a lotta standards to meet. ugh pls tell me its not boring i dont want it to be boring since its not fluff. anyway there will be more but im not sure how fast ill be able to write it. i like really dk how many more parts i could make of this ngl like i just wanna make a happy amazing pt 2 where reader and ellie just like live happily ever after. also this is my first time writing in second person so pls give me grace if its bad lmfao. love youđŸ«¶đŸ»
CW: cursing, angst?/slow burn, fem!reader (she/her), CAT (đŸ€źđŸ€§đŸ˜”â€đŸ’«)
WC: 3,688
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You didn’t hate Ellie Williams, not in the slightest.
In fact, when you first met the girl you were impressed by her nonchalant attitude and how quickly she adjusted to life in Jackson. You admired the bond she shared with her companion, Joel - the closeness they shared, the softness of his voice when he spoke to her, the glint in her eyes when she looked at him. That didn’t mean you missed the way she stared off distantly in her free time, or the way she would talk to others with a certain tiredness in her voice; but it wasn’t like you could talk to her about it.
You weren’t friends with her. Well, not anymore.
Ellie and you were friends when she first arrived, you made sure of it. You were always bringing her things to make the adjustment easier: blankets, sweaters, new socks, ammunition, and a new hairbrush, among other things. She was grateful for it at first, always thanking you, hunting you down for movie nights, and inviting you over for dinner with Joel. But at some point you messed up - you did something wrong.
She slowly began to ignore you, she started returning your home-baked goods and stopped inviting you to her house to watch movies. She started to talk to you just as cold as she talked to the others. She didn’t like you anymore.
Eventually, probably tired of your haphazard attempts to fix your friendship, she snapped. You left her house in tears that day with your head down, shoulders hunched and wobbly, trying to cover the tear streaks with your hair.
Ever since you’d tried to ignore her, her words, and the wounds they made. It was hard when she consumed your every waking thought. You thought about Ellie all the time - what you did wrong, the way her hair bounced as she walked, what you said to make her hate you, that one time at dinner she accidentally choked on water and spit it out her nose, the look in her eyes as she yelled in your face, all of the science stuff she had hidden away in every crevice of her room.
Every thought you had about Ellie contradicted the other and it was all so confusing that every time you thought too hard about it your head spun.
So you quickly found yourself doing simple, menial tasks to keep your thoughts at bay. You were picking up every patrol you were allowed, volunteering at the daycare to help your mom care for the kiddos, spending any and all free time at your friends houses instead of yours. You always finished your house chores early in the morning, always walked your neighbors dog once before noon and once after, always doing whatever you could to stay out of your own mind.
So you forgot about Ellie - as best as you could, at least.
It almost worked, too. Five years you got away with it, hiding from your mind and from Ellie. Until today, the one day you had been dreading for years. The day you knew was coming.
You were partnered with Ellie for patrol.
At first, you'd spent the first three hours complaining to your friends - Jesse mostly ignored you, only cracking jokes here or there, and Dina just didn't understand why you hated Ellie so bad. Eventually you just gave in and stopped complaining, finding some solace under the heavy duvet on your bed.
Before Dina left your home she gave you a warm smile and said, "You're gonna do great." And then left you to your own devices, not realizing she was leaving you to rot in your own brain.
When the time came to get up and get ready, you found yourself picking through your clothes, trying to find the cleanest shirt to wear and the pants that fit you the best. You wanted to look nice, most people would, but you weren't sure if it was for you or for her.
You walked nervously towards the stables, taking firm, heavy breaths as you shoved your hands into your jacket pockets.
"It'll be okay... It'll be okay," you chanted the words under your breath as you neared the stables, clenching and unclenching your sweaty fists.
When you arrived, Ellie was already leading Shimmer along to the exit, hardly glancing at you.
"You're late." She said, sucking on her teeth.
You nodded slowly, inhaling sharply, "I am aware..." speaking slowly and cautiously, trying not to poke the bear. "I kind of have my own stuff, though," the pitch of your voice raised slightly, as if you were unsure of your own words, "so I got here as fast as I could."
She scoffed, her head shaking slightly which sends her short strands of hair bouncing around her ears. "Just get the fucking horse."
You walked off hastily, unfurling Japan's reigns - when Dina didn't take him out, you did, because you both liked to make sure he had enough exercise everyday. You walked him down to meet Ellie at the gate.
Ellie was standing on one foot, shifting her weight every now and then and rubbing her palms down the length of her thighs; almost as if she was rubbing something off of them. She rubbed her thumbs on Shimmer's reigns nervously, head darting back and forth to see if you were close or not.
When you came into her line of sight, she hardened up and stood taller. Her face sharpened and her eyes filled with the same distance that kept you up at night, though today they also harbored another emotion, one you were no longer privy with.
It filled you with a sense of confusion and dread, causing you to mumble incoherently under your breath.
"Fucking Williams... cold as shit... pain in my ass..." you muttered as you mounted your horse.
Giving you one last weary look, Ellie also mounted her horse. She pulled her fingers through her hair, tucking it back behind her ear as the two of you left Jackson.
The horses trotted slowly, easily stepping over the tree roots in the ground as if they had the whole route memorized.
For you, this was one of the few routes you hardly visited. It wasn't too far from Jackson, but it was just far enough that you knew it'd take up the rest of your day.
As your eyes danced between the trail ahead of you and Ellie beside you, you didn't know what to think.
Sure, you'd thought of all the ways you would yell at her and all the things you'd say if you ever got the chance again; but you'd also thought of all the ways you'd make it up to her, all the things you wanted to say to let her know you weren't the same person you used to be.
What did it matter, anyway?
You were stuck here, letting your old wounds sit and fester in the bitterness of it all. You were stuck here, next to her but unable to fill the empty silence with words. You were stuck here, on patrol with the one person who hates your guts and you couldn't do anything about it.
"It's not polite to stare, you know."
Her voice echoed through the dense trees, bouncing off branches and leaves only to worm its way back into your brain.
"I'm sorry?" you hummed, caught off guard by the sound.
Her head slightly turned in your direction and Shimmer slowed down to a light trot, matching Japan's speed. "It's not polite to stare."
Her words were much sharper the second time around, with much more emphasis placed upon them.
She's angry. Amazing. You scoffed to yourself, trying to keep hold of your composure.
"I wasn't staring..." you paused. You almost said her name, but the word caught in your throat. "At you. I wasn't staring at you."
She glanced at you sideways before she continued, "you were."
"Was not!"
"Were too."
"I wasn't staring-!"
There it was again. You'd almost said her name, but it got caught in the back of your throat, which left you to haphazardly cut off your sentence and leave her hanging, waiting for it.
She scoffed. "Yes, you were."
You closed your mouth and pressed your lips into a line, "I wasn't fucking staring at you, Williams."
"So you stare at me, deny it when I tell you it's impolite, and then can't even use my name?" She stopped her horse, leaning back in the saddle as she spoke.
And the words get caught in your throat. Your mouth dried as you slowed your own horse.
"I used your name," you whispered, blinking away the wetness in your eyes.
She laughed sourly, pulled on Shimmer's reigns and began to trot ahead of you again.
You sighed at the bitterness brewing in the pit of your stomach. You certainly fucked that up - but was it entirely your fault? Surely some of that had to go to Ellie too - I mean she's the one who broke off your friendship... she's the one who yelled at you for "staring." You weren't staring in the first place... right?
You began to question yourself, yet again, as Ellie spoke up once more.
"You're still staring."
And suddenly it's almost as if you could hear the smirk she had on her face.
"Could you fucking not? Please? I'm just trying to get to the tower and go home alive. I don't want to deal with this bullshit too."
"Stop fucking staring then," she whipped around to face you. "I definitely didn't ask for this either, so stop being a baby and get over it."
You clenched your fists and brought one to your face, rubbing your eyes with your palm.
"I'm not staring at you, El-"
You stopped talking after you finally looked directly into her eyes, catching sight movement behind her.
She began to scoff but suddenly stopped as your face changed.
"What?"
"Shut up."
You tilted your head to the side, narrowing your eyes as you focused on a shadowy figure hidden in the trees.
The figure stilled under a long branch, the leaves creating long shadows which warped around the curves of the figure.
Slowly, you reached for the pistol strapped to your thigh. Ellie's face scrunched in a mix of confusion and worry.
"Don't," you breathed, "move."
At the sound of your sharp exhale the figure screeched and aimed for Ellie, its dark eyes fixated on her.
You brought the gun up, aiming and pulling the trigger as fast as you could, but the stalker was hardly affected by the single bullet.
Ellie whipped around, yelping once before the stalker jumped on her and yanked her off of Shimmer. The stalker pinned her to the ground, its teeth already bared and ready to bite.
You pulled the trigger again. And again. And again. Until eventually the stalker slumped down above Ellie.
She pushed it off and brought herself to her feet, head whipping around to look for others.
"Do you see any more?" you asked as you scanned the area.
She shook her head, "I don't think so... holy shit."
You both sat quietly for a moment as you tried to process what just happened.
"Thanks- thanks for uh, for that," she panted, mounting Shimmer again and looking around, "that was close."
For a moment you were rendered speechless, trying to piece the puzzle back together in your brain before responding. "Yeah... of course," you paused, adding lightly, "s'what friends do." It came out a little mumbled but you knew she heard it.
You didn't keep your eyes on hers long enough to gauge her reaction, but you figured it was one full of something negative. You looked up one last time and caught her eyes, the strangest look on her face, before turning back down and looking away.
"The tower's just up that way," you hesitated, waiting for her to say - or do - something. To do anything. But she didn't, so you continued, "there shouldn't be any more in the area, they just cleared it last week."
You shifted on the saddle, cringing slightly, urging Japan to move forward again.
The rest of your route went okay - you didn't encounter anymore infected and the area is mostly barren anyway so you didn't find anything worthwhile. The tower was cleared already, too, so you and Ellie mostly found solace in your own thoughts for the rest of the route.
She didn't mention the staring thing again, opting to keep quiet instead, but you could feel her eyes meeting the side of your head every now and then.
You didn't say anything to her as you re-entered Jackson, walking side by side to the stables to put the horses back.
Ellie was brushing out Shimmer's mane as she opened her mouth to speak, "hey, thanks for earlier. Seriously. It means a lot."
You nodded, "no worries," and you paused, unsure of what to say next. Before you could, Ellie spoke up again.
"And sorry, by the way," she said, eyes darting around the stables, "for being mean."
At that, you found yourself completely dumbfounded, eyes wide, staring across the stables at her. And before you had the chance to recover from the shock she was flying out of the stables, probably heading back to Joel's house.
Within the next four minutes you'd rushed to Dina's, tripping and stumbling over your own feet, heart pounding and mind racing.
"She apologized?" Dina asked incredulously, eyebrows raised and lips turned downward, "for real?"
You shrugged, "I guess. I can't believe it either."
"Yeah, dude, she hated you for years but you play hero once and now she likes you again?" Jesse laughed, shaking his head, "bullshit."
"I never said she liked me again, Jesse. I was just telling you what happened. She apologized. That's what happened."
"Maybe she realized you aren't that bad," Dina smiled.
"Oh thanks, Dee, I'm honored."
Dina chuckled, leaning towards you and smacking your shoulder playfully, "and it's about time."
You paused, chewing on your lip as you thought of the day's events over and over and over again.
"I hope this is a new beginning for you guys, you deserve it."
You stopped your thinking, pulling yourself out of your thoughts to respond with a smile, "thanks, Dee."
"So, now that that's out of the way," Dina smiled suggestively, narrowing her eyes and raising her eyebrows, "you want to come to the bar with us later? Everyone's gonna be there."
You couldn't miss the suggestive tone in her voice, the way it dropped a pitch and she gained a mischievous glint in her eyes.
You hummed, "are they? Good for them."
Dina sighed exhaustedly, "c'mon! You never come with us! It'll be so much fun, I promise!"
"I don't know, Dina. You know I'm not one for parties."
"Well, you are tonight," she tapped the palm of her hand against the table, "because you are coming with me and we are going to dance all night and have so much fun. So much so, in fact, that you're going to completely forget how much you hate parties!"
"Oh, is that right?" You smiled as you began to chuckle.
She hummed, a particularly big grin splattered on her face.
"Yeah, your new best friend might be there too," Jesse added, which earned a nasty look from you and a disapproving look from Dina.
"Shut up!" Dina shouted, turning her attention to Jesse - which only threw you right back into your own head.
After Dina snapped you out of it, and after a lot more begging and pleading on her part, you agreed. It couldn't be that bad - right?
The party was nothing short of what you'd expected.
It was loud, crammed, kind of smelly, and definitely not the place you wanted to be spending your time.
But every time you caught Dina's eyes or you looked over in her direction, the smile on her face was enough to make you feel so deeply guilty that you stayed put. You stayed with her if she brought you out to dance and you stayed with her if she brought you to the bar to get a new drink.
It wasn't a surprise when you noticed Ellie at the bar, nursing a cold cup, staring at you with a conflicting expression. It also wasn't a surprise when Dina grabbed your hand and started dragging you in her direction, giving you one last reassuring smile.
It was a surprise, however, when Ellie greeted Dina with a hug and you with a smile.
She smiled at you.
Completely unable to quickly recover, you let Dina do the talking, trying to calm your racing heart.
"Hey, El! How're you doing?" she had to shout over the music but you knew Ellie could hear her - everyone could hear Dina.
"Pretty good! You okay?"
They began to exchange pleasantries and all the usual small talk, so you spaced out for a moment, waiting for the moment Dina would pull you away again. That moment didn't come, however, because Dina ran off without you.
"Wait - where's she going?" you yelled, eyes finally meeting Ellie's.
"Said she was gonna grab Jesse," Ellie began, eyes scanning over your outfit. "You want a drink?"
You hesitated, thinking over what happened during patrol. You lost yourself, again, and began mulling over what you could say and how she would possibly respond.
But then you began speaking, your mind not caught up yet.
"Sure!"
Ellie's face relaxed a little, and she waved you over towards a quieter area of the bar. The flannel tucked up to her elbows showcased the way her muscles flexed as she signaled Seth over to your side of the bar.
"You doing okay?" You asked as Seth walked away. "It just... looked like that stalker shook you up a bit."
She nodded, "Yeah, yeah. It was a little," she shrugged and let out a mangled noise, "nerve wracking." You both laughed.
Seth dropped your drink in front of you, giving you a sideways glance before returning to the packed end of the bar.
"You know how it goes, though," she finished. "I'm good."
"Well, that is certainly a plus."
Her lips tugged into a small grin, making you mirror the expression.
"Thanks again, by the way."
"Hey, we were partners. It was my job to have your back."
You both laughed again.
And you fell back into it. Into that easy-going, comfortable rhythm you had with her so many years ago. It was like no time had passed at all; like you were fourteen again.
And even when Dina came back she didn't hide it. You were finally able to openly talk to your two friends together again. It was like a dream.
"Hey, Ellie!" No. "I haven't seen you in forever!" No. "You look so good!" No.
"Oh! Hey, Cat!"
No.
You could almost taste the tension that had suddenly built up around the three of you; the sudden change in the air sending your head reeling and heart pounding.
Ellie and Cat exchanged pleasantries (not like you were interested or anything) as you suddenly honed in on a weirdly shaped ice cube in your drink. Poking at it with your straw, you waited for Cat to leave, holding your breath.
And in less than five minutes, you fell out of it.
You fell out of your rhythm, Ellie already ten beats ahead of you while you seemed to have changed rhythms completely.
When Cat did (finally) leave you let out a shaky breath, watching as even Ellie noticed the shift in you.
"Sorry," she said sheepishly, mostly directing the apology to Dina. She turned to face Dina straight on now, no longer moving her eyes between the two of you.
"You're fine," Dina brushed it off quickly, seemingly unaware of the sudden awkwardness.
"I should uh... go anyway. Joel's waiting for me, so... you know."
"Oh, yeah, sure. We should go soon too," Dina draped an arm around your shoulders, "I have kept someone here for way too long. She's getting a little antsy." She gave you a pointed smile, a teasing tone lacing her voice.
Ellie gave Dina a half-hearted chuckle before standing and hugging her. She gave you a very awkward, sideways, one armed hug before turning around and almost running out of the building.
"You want to go now or wait a little-"
"Can we go, Dina?" you rushed, clenching your eyes shut as you rubbed the balls of your palms into your eyes. "I'm just... really tired."
Dina stared at your face, her eyes scanning yours, for an extra beat before nodding, "Yeah, of course."
At home you spent the rest of your night hiding under your duvet, pulling at large chunks of your hair with your fists, digging your heels into your bed; all the way until you finished the night tiredly blinking away tears and chewing at your lips.
It was all so confusing. One minute you're dreading even looking at her and the next you're talking and laughing with her like you're best friends - and then? Then you're sitting there like the two of you never started talking again at all, all because Ellie said hi to an old friend.
One minute she's talking to you, then the next she's talking to you through Dina.
You woke in the morning with blood dried on your lips and dark bags under your eyes. You found it hard to keep your eyes open as you brushed your teeth, and one look in the mirror showed that you were in no state to leave your home anytime soon.
Your parents left quickly for work, not giving you a second glance even as you asked them to clear your schedule for the day.
Around noon you received a familiar knock at the door, and when you opened it you saw a face that hadn't graced your porch in a few years.
"Hey, Ellie," you paused, panicking internally. "What's up?"
"Do you want to talk?"
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rmoonstoner · 1 year ago
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9:30ish am, 08/18/23
All works are temporarily on hold due to a wild fire close to my home.
Sorry for any inconvenience.
❀ 💙
Update: 10:17am
All I can hear over the street construction for sewer are the echos of sirens in the city. The street construction crews are still working on my street. That tells me we are safe. For now.
Update: 2:40pm
More sirens. The air is thick and heavy with smoke. Burning embers are now hitting my neighborhood. Multiple areas have had small fires start up. We have set up sprinklers and started dousing our property.
Update: 08/19/23 - 2:55pm
The air quality is worse than before. We managed to get to the stores and get supplies to stock our van and camper. Lots of businesses are closed for the weekend, and if not, they close way earlier than before. We are all loaded and ready to go at a moment's notice.
Update: 08/20/23 - 8:10am
The fire has grown to 11,000 hectares as of 7:20pm last night. Over 30,000 people have been evacuated from their homes. A lot of people I know are. Power outages keep happening. The skies are still so smokey, we cannot see the mountains we are very close to. It's hard to see the houses down the street. Fire crews from all over British Columbia have come to our aid, which we are thankful for, even though we have multiple other fires happening in BC. As of yet, I am still lucky enough to be in my home with my family. Rest assured, we are packed and ready to leave when necessary.
On a lighter note, it is my eldest son's birthday today. We hope to make the most of this day. 🎂 ❀
Update: 08/21/23 - 7:41am
First of all, my son loved his birthday yesterday. He understands what is happening as he's a teenager, so he wasn't expecting a big get-together with the fires happening. He was super happy he got ice cream cake and a whole pizza for himself and one for his best friend who was able to come spend the day with him. We gave him video game programming gear, new keyboard, new headphones, and movie tickets.
Secondly, it looks about the same today as it did yesterday. With the smoke in the air, the sun is red and it's cold outside when it supposed to be warm. Less sirens and one area on the evacuation map (that I noticed) has turned from evacuation now, to alert. It means those people in that area can go home for now, if local law enforcement allows it.
Update: 08/22/23 - 7:20am
I forgot to mention that all airports in our region are grounded and have been for at least two days due to the smoke and ash in thee air. All Canada post mail (to our region) has been put on immediate hold due to safety concerns. This is will definitely put a wrench into other delivery companies as well.
It finally rained last night. It was off and on all night. The smoke has cleared up enough to see the faded outline of the mountains 1 km away from me, finally.
One thing that boggles my mind is that so many people seem not bothered by the wild fires.
‱ The old lady I help was confused as to why I could not come on Friday or Monday. She apparently doesn't believe in getting ready for evacuation unless it actually happens. I have a family of 6, and 2 cats. I have to get all these people ready, as 2 are children, and 2 are seniors. My husband just had hip surgery 3 months ago, so he needs more help than he normally does.
‱ My father ignored my mother's pleas to pack up her things and get ready for the possible evacuation. He's a boomer that used to be a workaholic, and now he's retired and believes it's his God given right to be a lazy slob. So I had to do everything.
‱ The neighbor just gets on his motorbike and decides that going for a ride up the FIRE STRIKEN MOUNTAIN is a good idea.
‱ Other neighbors decided to have a BONFIRE in their back yard, while ash falls from the sky onto their heads.
‱ People in the city had the audacity to fire off FIREWORKS this weekend.
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Like, wow.
Update: 08/23/23 - 1:00pm
It rained all night. The skies are clearer and breathable today. More of the red excavation zones have changed to orange alert areas. People are now being allowed back into their homes. Packages and mail has started to arrive today.
Update: 08/24/23 - 7:16am
Yesterday was cool and mildly windy. We have a little more smoke lingering in the air than yesterday, but it's still better than it was on the weekend.
☆☆☆
Stay safe out there!
❀ 💙
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icharchivist · 7 months ago
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tbh also, while i don't have to justify myself and it's really just explaining it there too also for my sake, but i've mostly be offline bc i'm trying to finish a backlog of games DLKJFDLKFJ
i finished ff7 and i was principally liveblogging it because i have friends from the FF fandom on here and i could discuss a bit of the game with them when i was playing it, so it made sure i was reasonably active on here
one of my friend has been streaming ff7 to me these past few weeks and he just finished the game two days ago, so i was also mostly distracted with the streams, we were discussing the game hard then
i had planned on going back to my FF backlog but the DA announcement really derailed all my plans and i'm probably going back into a deep dive DA summer until Autumn. I don't specifically blog about it when i replay DA tho (i really don't like the fandom on here </3 so i just spam friends in private when it happens), so aside from occasional posts i probably won't talk about it much too (tho i'm also rereading Tevinter Nights at the same time and i MIGHT blog about The Wigmaker Job when i get to it. for Lucanis' propaganda's sake.)
But said friend who was streaming to me wanted to discuss something i mentioned when we were discussing ff7 (and i don't even remember what it was exactly) and he asked me if i ever played one of his fav games, and turns out i had.... almost? played his fav game? as in i played like 4/5 of the game and stopped when i thought the game was going to stop because i didn't want it to end :( but there was actually a lot more content after that LMAOO but it means i paused this game for 2 years now. And my friend really wanted to discuss the ending with me and it gave me a kick to finish the game before returning to my DA insanity
so now i'm mostly dedicating my days to that (and BOY was i NOT as close to the end than i thought!) but since it's also a game i don't want to talk about on main, i'm mostly quiet on here
it allowed me a bit of me time to recollect my thoughts in general and chill, so it's nice, but yeah!
that's more or less what i've been up to. finishing that game so i can go back to my true calling (being insane about DA).
*mumbles* tho i forgot GW today so it may change my plans a bit. how rude.
Anyway i hope you guys have been fine <3 that's the slight update on everything i guess ahah
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too-many-rooks · 9 months ago
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Writing procrastination game!
Thanks @lastlymatt for tagging me, I got rambly so I’ll put this under a ‘read more’
Tagging @pigandpepper @known-concepts @countessrivers
1.) what’s the name of one of your wips?
My doc names are usually very boring 95% of the time I finish a fic and think it’s ready to post and realise I need a title. How about ‘Yassen Bedroom Visit’?
2.) Describe a Wip in the format of __+__=__
SCORPIA heir Alex + totally normal kidnapping and drugging in the middle of the night get to safety orienteering exercises = childhood trauma
3.) What tags/warnings will one of your Wips need if you share it?
Forced child seperation?
4.) alternative title to a wip?
I don’t really have alternate titles! Titles tend to come pretty late in the process!
5.) which wip are you most likely to update/finish next?
Probably one of my s3 aus I’ve got brewing, there’s a longer thing I posted the first chapter of today but I also have some one shots, one where Yassen gets wounded fighting off Alex’s enemies and Alex basically has to hold him down to say he cares about him, and another where Yassen comes to chat to him in the middle of the night (while Alex is sleeping) and they catch up.
6.) what is one of your wip’s document title, not what it’s name is but what you have it saved as?
Again, extremely boring. Some examples - ‘Tom/House introduction’, ‘stables’, ‘the ball’, ‘heir apparent 1-9’, ‘hunting’ ‘hostage’ ‘orienteering.’
On reflection, these are very badly organised. But, hey Ho.
7.) post any sentence from your WIP?
Okay this took me forever to decide bc I want to share like, all of my sentences, but here’s a sentence from my SCORPIA heir Alex thing where Yassen just tries to take a day off, but is interrupted by Alex sneaking out of school/the country and mountain his school is on
‘Rubbing his eyes with his forefinger and thumb, he blocked out the little blonde headache sat before him, and sighed, already imagining the state of his email inbox when he got back to his laptop, which he’d sworn would stay folded in its case for the rest of the day.
“And how long ago was this? When should I start expecting panicked calls from your father?”‘
8.) a scrapped idea from your WIP?
Not necessarily a scrapped idea but evidently one I forgot about and rediscovered as I was flicking through google docs - originally a pre-season 3 idea (but could work post s3) where Yassen retires, and decides it’s time for Alex to retire too, even if he doesn’t want to. Very “congratulations you are being adopted! Do not resist.” Meme with Yassen that I’ve seen on here, the bit I’d written was him contemplating the least traumatising way to kidnap him, to make sure they’re a happy family unit post-kidnapping
9.) what’s a story you would love to write but have yet to start?
Alex sees dead people AU - Ian knows, when he dies his ghost becomes bound to Alex, and helps take care of him/watch over him in the field, Alex bumps into Yassen at Point Blanc and immediately recognises the ghost bound to him as his father, especially as he begs the assassin to stop pretending like he can’t hear him for once and let him see his son, to protect him.
10.) how many WIPs are you actively working on?
Four - regency fic, darker Alex s3 au, two other s3 aus I mentioned earlier. Suprised myself by how much of this longer ‘SCORPIA heir’ Alex thing that I’d put off for a while I’ve actually written. That’s one that I really want to finish before I start posting bc I’m bad at doing work without an immediate emotional reward/it’s a longer than anything I’ve written before and I don’t want to give up on it when it’s half published. I had been delaying it till after s3 but maybe time to get to work (will try and finish regency fic first)
11.) is there a scene your struggling to write now?
Oh I mean so many but the most immediate stumbling block is with the regency fic, chapter after this one they go to a ball and that’s almost basically written and so is a lot of the next two chapters but there’s things I need to thread into this chapter that just don’t want to be threaded - I need Alex to start being a bit more suspicious of Yassen, and remember that whole thing about his uncle being murdered now he’s a bit passed the initial princess diaries revelation moment.
I was thinking like Alex waiting up for him on Christmas Eve or something and falls asleep then is woken by Yassen sneaking back in and Alex noticed he’s got blood on his clothes or something and Yassen just shrugs him off and reacts more strictly/authoritatively than he has before. But the scene is a bit sludgy I my mind atm.
12.) Not a question but a second kudos!
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barbieslayer08 · 2 years ago
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Today was rough. I masked being content for the better part but now, I'm exhausted. And I don't Wana do this anymore today. I want to be angry, and sad, and stop hiding the fact that the longer I saty away from him the worse I feel. He was aweful to me. Cheated, destroyed my self confidence, he was the last person who ever said I was pretty. The last person who told me I was smart. The last person to hold like they were genuinely afraid to lose me. And all of a sudden it was gone. And just like that it was gone. Huddenly I was fat, and stupid, and every fight ended with him telling me that I'm so unhappy with him then I knew where the door was. It broke me a little bit more every time. Made me feel like a lesser person each time.
I got to know him as my best friend. He cared for me. Apologized when he acted like an ass. It genuinely hurt him when he made me cry. Now I'm 33, still never married with 2 kids. And I can't get a single to actually ask me on a single date. Not a coffee, nothing. No one wants me. I don't even want me. I truly feel like a waste of a person, but I can't bring myself to actually end it. It's selfish ,bc aside from my kids no one would be bothered by it. Not a single person. The only ppl at my funeral tomorrow, would be my dad, maybe my kids, and all of 2 friends. That's it. I don't have anyone else. No one to depend on, no one I can trust, no one that would atleast fake care about me. I don't even want someone to bang, I want someone to come over and hold me, tell me I mean something to them, to tell me I'm pretty bc I long ago forgot how to tell those word to myself. For year I've been told by everyone else, even my own mom, my dad, both sisters, friends, and men who claimed the loved me that lesser. And I listen bc I didn't realize I had a voice in my own narrative in life. I'm still struggling to find my voice, like learning how to talk again. To unlearn all the self hate talk. I'm not good at learning other languages. As always it's nice to finally say any of this. Even when no one reads it. I atleast I know that when I inevitably die, some where I the sub reach of the internet that will exist for no purpose, will be this, my memoir of sorts. Maybe someone can make a it book some day. Maybe I'll make it my kids final task for me. To make the final update about when and how I die. If I'm lucky it'll be something interesting, more then likely it'll be a heart attack, or stroke. I just hope I'm found to late. It sucks enough to be dead inside. Let alone half dead outside. Well, time to go. Maybe one day I'll be able to update this with out being so damn depressing.
#lifedump
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rebellum · 2 months ago
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Ive had a bad day today (due to period and I think overexertion) after 2 good days where I did a couple hours each day of work (hence thr overexertion)(also i totally forgot how to spell that autocorrect saved the day idk if you guys would have gotten "over ex her sion") and so I'm having one of those moments where I'm just Fed Up. It feels like when there's a big snow storm in late March. Like, hey, this isn't rally unexpected, but come ON we are SO CLOSE cant this just be over yet?
And i worry that I'm actually lying to ppl somehow bc I feel like my boyfriend doesn't understand how sick I still am, even tho he definitely knows (and is the one to have to tell me "hey, picking a video game based on which is less likely to cause mass real life death from demons is a mental illness thought, just so you know") and so he definitely knows so I dont know why I feel like I'm lying. Maybe cause my friends don't know the details? But I think they know i have more than just anxiety and depression and trauma. At the psychiatrist office the other day I said i didn't have ptsd and we had a weird miscommunication where he thought I meant I dont have trauma. When obviously I do very much. And he had to be like "someone who wasn't traumatized wouldn't be crying in my office right now" (he said that much kinder than how I'm typing it) and I was so confused and then explained that I don't have nightmares about the trauma and he was like "yeah but you don't need nightmares to have ptsd" but then he immediately moved on , which was weird, like ok are you thinking I could have ptsd and don't know it?? But I dont think i do, it doesn't ruin my life like others, tho I'll admit the people I'm close to who have it have cptsd which has slightly different symptoms, I can see my fingers typing from the mirror that's near my bed and it confused and almost startled me for a quick second lol. Earlier today I experienced some heart palpitations like I haven't for a while, so I guess I have to keep an eye on that, it was bizarre because I was fine and just sitting there and suddenly it felt like my heart was a horse with 11 legs, I would have said a lesser number that would have made slightly more sense (i mean, 11 is too much, it wuldnt be able to go anywhere) but those were potentially numbers that didn't have their place in this post right now (tho I like using them some times, I have nothing against you guys)(sorry @ readers) but I mean my heart was beating so fast and so erratically and it was ODD like uh. Hi. Haven't had you get this bad in a while. It's fine though I'm fine, I have a beh nine heart murmur and tach ee cardia (or is it palpitations? Or both?) But turns out while my heart acts weird its still fine, like when someone puts on tap handles the wrong way. Did you guys know that's a thing? I don't mean like the cold tap says hot, I mean like its supposed to be a tap water runs when you move the handle towards you, but if you mess up it makes it so that to turn the tap on you turn the handle away from you, which can work if there's space, but when my brothers sink randomly exploded a few weeks ago (and started sending up a whole guys-er) my bro and parents went to fix it and put the taps on the wrong way, and it was against a wall so they had to go back to step like 5 of putting a sink together and redo it.
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honeyedbrie · 4 months ago
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so I just got absolutely pimp slapped by my adhd tax..
very long story, but, I fucked up my elbow a couple of years ago at work and had to quit my job but didn't go through with workers comp bc there was just so much paperwork and I didn't have anyone to help me with it, so I had no money, and therefore I couldn't afford my student loans for a couple months, and then it just stopped coming out altogether and I forgot about it
well well well, guess who just met the consequences of their inaction😭
I got an email today that I'm actively going to be kicked out of my current classes in the next like,, 2 days? bc I haven't paid my tuition? so I actually went into my student loan account, and Guess who Can't Get a Loan!
I genuinely want to yeet myself into space, I was just getting into the rhythm of everything! I am actually Keeping Up in my classes!!! and I find them all so interesting and I like my profs and now I may have to either, a) drop out for now, or b) drop down to one class and pray I have enough money in my bank account, and then try to get a part time job some where bc being in school means I get kicked off of social assistance!
Oh, also, if I have to drop down to one class, I'm gonna have to go with the one that I bought the $100 text book for, but that one is at a campus in another city, and notably Not the campus I bought a parking pass for. which was like $240.
oh, also, I have apparently aged out of the scholarship that I earned! which I did not realize could happen!
I hate it here. deadass catch me on Mars. I don't care if it's just me and Perseverance I will pull a Matt Damon and terraform.
I just wanna write in peace😭
if u have the inclination/means, pls hit me up for my paypal or something, I just truly do not know what to do😭
I also have a ton of stickers and stuff available on my redbubble!!! and I think they're pretty damn cute! the shop is HoneyedBrie, same as here!
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teenandbeyond · 2 years ago
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Heya! I hope you dont mind a dragon ball request (if you are tired of this i understand and you can delete the ask, its ok!!)
If you could, would you write an x reader for android 16 and/or yamcha with s/o that has separation anxiety/fear of abandonment? They are very rare characters and i love the so SO much, but no one writes for them :<
Yamcha x Anxious. Reader
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I've never written Yamcha before, did some research too since I'm rusty on his character. Edit: Headcanon style and short bc today was rough.
Want more from me? Check out Masterlist 2!
☆*: .ïœĄ. .ïœĄ.:*☆☆*: .ïœĄ. .ïœĄ.:*☆
⚟Don't Go⚟
Warning(s): None
You really love your boyfriend Yamcha, but you don't take being away from him very well.
✹✹✹✹✹✹
Honestly, when you met Yamcha your first impression was that he was kind of ditzy.
He would hit on you but wasn't as smooth as he thought he was.
You didn't really give him the time of day at first because you didn't get close to people, they always let you down and left.
Until he said something that stuck a cord with you.
"You know I'm never giving up on you, right?"
That was the first time you ever heard those words.
"Fine, I'll bite. You said something about a date?"
One date turned to two, two became four, and then you found yourself with a crush.
Which scared you.
But Yamcha assured you, he wouldn't leave you.
He took care of you in the best way he could, with affection, giving you surprises, making you laugh.
"I know I don't have much money but...I still want to make you happy anyway!"
You could care less that he didn't have much, you gave up on materialistic things long ago, they meant nothing to you over love.
You got to learn and understand each other.
He gained maturity by being with you.
He became a new man, you made him want to be better.
He's never been closer to anyone than he's been to you.
But one day you woke up and he wasn't there, no note like he'd do sometimes or anything.
Cue you beginning to panic.
Where did he go?
Did he get tired of you?
He left you, didn't he?
You didn't blame him. Everyone got tired of you, put you second, and left when they no longer had a use.
Your eyes watered, blurring your vision and you let them fall.
You never should've let him in.
You never should've trusted when he'd say he'd never leave you.
No one stayed.
You curled in on yourself.
"But...I don't want him to go."
You wanted him to be the one who stayed.
"[Name]?"
Now you were hearing him, way to make things worse.
"[Name]? Sweetheart, what's wrong?"
He stood in front of you, brows furrowed in concern.
You cried even harder, hugging his waist to cry into his stomach.
"Aww, baby. Shh. What happened? You want to tell me about it?" he chuckled, "I'm not the best at advice, but I'll listen."
"I thought you left me!"
Embarrassed, he explained he'd been rushing to get you a gift for your anniversary, and forgot to write a note.
"I told you I'd never leave you, babe, I meant that."
He...didn't leave you.
He's right, he'd never do that.
"You're not tired of me?"
"No! Not at all!"
He wasn't tired of you.
It's fine that you let him in.
He hasn't destroyed your fortress only to leave the door by its hinges on his way out.
"You know how much I love you, right?"
You nod, kissing his stomach through his shirt, "I love you, too."
He blushed at your gaze, "D-Don't look at me like that, that look means trouble!"
Trouble indeed.
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whenemmafallsinlove · 2 years ago
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What happened? Are you alright?
not really. to give you a rundown
1. a few weeks ago i was sad that taylor nation didn’t see something i tweeted. and i hadn’t been taking my antidepressants so i was already not doing well. so i tweeted i was sad about it. and bc my twitter has randomly blown up from 2k to 11k, the tweet got attention and i got hate for it. (was it really about being sad about taylor nation? no, but i don’t know how to cope with the real life things i’ve actually been dealing with so i channeled those feelings into something stupid)
2. i noticed some “friends” of mine softblocked me and asked why. never will i make that mistake again. (also, to me my mutuals are my friends
 or acquaintances i guess? but my use of the word friend really upset some people)
3. when they ignored me i was sad and tweeted something along the lines of “it sucks when someone you thought was your friend softblocks you” and then also later said it was bringing up memories of when my “friends” were mean in grade school
 which it did, like i wasn’t making that up
4. the main person instigating all this really had a field day with that saying it was insane behavior to compare softblocking to bullying etc etc. i blocked
5. days later i made a twitter thread of tour tips answering questions people had. like, questions people were asking me. so i was just responding. the thread blew up so i tweeted “my venmo is xyz /joking” like with the tone indicator joking because it was a joke that everyone does under their hit tweets. a couple people venmoed me a dollar and i was laughing with them about it but sent it back obviously!! but i ended up getting a bunch of hate for that and for the thread. people claimed i was just chasing clout etc. i deleted the venmo part and apologized
6. to me this is the only real thing i did wrong. i tweeted that it was funny to me that i was pissing big name swifties off with my tour thread. i shouldn’t have said that and i am sorry for it but i can’t undo the past. anyways people had a field day with the big name swiftie thing and just saying i preach kindness but i’m actually a huge asshole etc (all of this mainly started by that one person)
7. i thought i had blocked that person but i’ve been periodically going thru and removing our mutual follows to fully cut ties because i’m tired of being harassed by them. at some point i guess i forgot to block them again bc they saw me tweet about the fake taylor nation account today and posted a mean video about it. i said that i was begging them to leave me alone and they responded that they were begging me to shut up.
8. i went private and people were screenshotting my tweets and sending to that person. so id finally had enough so i blocked and also used a third party app to chain block all their followers to remove whoever was following me just to screenshot my tweets and send them to people i’ve blocked. and now everyone and their mom is making fun of me on twitter and that’s what you missed on glee
honestly with the way people are treating me you’d think i committed literal murder or something but no i literally just had the audacity to have feelings and remove a toxic person and their followers from my life. i only did the chain block because i knew that a) the person who was screenshotting my stuff clearly followed both of us and b) i didn’t want to be That Person who is like “everyone please unfollow xyz”
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strawberrymilkgeorge · 4 years ago
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Part Three. Ex-boyfriends and Mr. MoneyBags
warnings: ex-boyfriend is a dick, mentions of emotional and mental abuse, swearing word count: 933 (not including pictures)
behind the screen (irl dream x reader) series masterlist ultimate masterlist
edit: omg the dates on the dms between dream and yn are SO wrong just don't look at them lol
edit 2: added another photo for Karl/yn conversation two days after posting bc I forgot it
**********
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A wave of discomfort washed over Y/n as it alway did when talking about her ex-boyfriend. It gave her an ominously unsettling feeling in her stomach that she was not fond of. She shook her head and pretended like she couldn't hear his voice in the back of her head as she fixed her hair in the mirror. Healing, she reminded herself. Not perfect, but healing.
"Y/n?" Naomi called through the house.
"In my room!"
Naomi appeared moments later at Y/n's door. "Hey, I'm getting food, do you want anything?"
"I'm okay, thanks."
"Oh, hey, I watched Karl's stream from a few days ago earlier. You were so good."
"Thanks," Y/n thanked as she sat back down, forgetting all the disgust she felt moments ago from thinking about her past. Naomi sat on the corner of the bed. "Could you tell I was nervous?"
"Not at all. You were so funny. And George is so sweet. If only I had a friend who could set me up on a date with him..."
"Naomi!" Y/n laughed. "I've never even met him in person, how would you go on a date? Fly to England?"
"Yeah. He and I could work all those details out if you gave me his number."
"He'd fly here just to kill me if I gave anyone his number."
"Fine," she sighed jokingly. "Are you still going to Karl's later?"
"Tomorrow."
"Oh. Well.... I'm hungry soooo I'm going to go get something to eat."
"Drive safe," Y/n ordered as she turned back to her computer and Naomi left the room.
"I will. Love you!"
As Y/n looked back at her computer to figure out something to cure her boredom, her phone lit up with a DM from Twitter.
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She giggled to herself as she set her phone down and opened up Minecraft. She had nothing to do all day so she decided to start a stream, titling it "chill minecraft?? if any mobs ruin the chill ill actually cry??"
Y/n laughed to herself even though she knew it wasn't that funny. She didn't even bother to start with her usual "starting soon" screen, jumping right into playing.
"Hello, hello everyone," Y/n greeted vaguely as she opened the survival world she usually streamed. She had made decent progress on it, but it hadn't been long since she started it. "Hello. I'm super bored so I figured I'd stream and we can all just hang out and chill out. Is the music too loud? Can you hear it? Everyone type yes if it's good..." she paused as she waited for responses and adjusted the volume of the music accordingly.
She tried to not think about how much larger her viewer count was than usual, figuring it was probably mostly because she had been on Karl's stream not long before.
"Welcome, if you're new! Sorry if you don't find house building exciting, usually I do a lot more chaotic things but I'm determined to get my base done today. I can't keep coming home to a dirt shack."
Her chat started spamming one thing, making her roll her eyes slightly, a smile on her lips.
user3: DREAM HELLO
user6: Dream's here!!!!!
user7: DREAM
Y/n couldn't help but see the few negative comments that passed, calling her a clout chaser.
"Judging by everyone saying Dream's here, I assume Dream's here?" she said with a laugh as she continued collecting dark oak wood and making sure to replant the saplings. "Hello, sir."
user10: are they finally actually friends??? not just Twitter friends????
user16: Dream just lingering we see you sir
"Chat, should I make my real home first or the treehouse? I'm thinking the treehouse but I don't really have an idea for how to do it yet."
user1: TREEHOUSE
user2: treehouse treehouse treehouse
user4: do a cottage!!
user6: treehouse but make it on multiple trees and connect them with bridges
user11: it's so funny seeing bugsy just peacefully building bc usually I only catch her chaos streams
"Okay okay overwhelming amount of treehouse answers," she breathed out with a laugh as she looked around the forest for a good tree. "Thanks sarahnotfound for the ten gifted subs!"
A donation lit up in the corner of her screen and she read it out loud. "Face reveal when? Thank you, Jasmine, um..." she paused, thinking. "I don't know. I do want to eventually but I have no plans to or anything. I'm not ready to right now so it'll still be a while before I do a face reveal."
Donations and gifted subs continued, Y/n expressing her gratitude for each one of them. She had the base down for her treehouse as a large one came through.
"Dream!" she yelled angrily, a laugh bubbling behind it before sighing. "Thank you Dream." She looked away from the amount and read his message, which read, save some of that building for the smp. "DREAM! Why would you give me– ohmygosh. Is this your way of announcing to everyone that I'm joining the SMP? By giving me $100? I can't stand you." Her words were no threat since you could clearly hear the smile in her tone.
She glanced at chat before talking again and continuing her house. "Yeah, yeah, everyone, I'm joining the Dream SMP. But considering I'm fantastic at PVP, I'm not going to be doing much building. Sorry," she said now directed at Dream. "Maybe you can hire me to build something but I don't work for free."
A few minutes passed before a second donation from Dream came through.
yes I did announce it by giving you money and I'll do it again, under another $100 donation
"DREAM, I SWEAR—"
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**********
PREVIOUS | NEXT
behind the screen (irl dream x f!reader) series masterlist ultimate masterlist
**********
A/N: part 3 pog! lowkey don’t really like the chapter because it’s mostly a filler but i hope you guys do!! i needed to get a lil bit of background about y/n’s ex but we’ll get deeper into it later on!
let me know how y’all like this chapter!! do you prefer parts like this with mostly social media or do you like the previous ones better when there’s a lot more written??
also thank you thank you thank for all your continuous love for this series!! it seriously means so much to me and i love y’all so much lol 
taglist: OPEN (at the time) @hydrate-tion @loraleiix @tinaswagbd @charsdummb @smileyyuta @1ghoste1 @cerberus-hellhound @gaysludge @queestionmark @carnations-red @letsloveimagines @the-fictionwriters-hairdo @boiled-onionrings @a-cryptic @fee-btheweeb​ @letsloveimagines @erwinss @just-a-stan @axths @kayleigh2703 @furiouspockettoad @sometimeseverythingsucks​ @powerpuffyn​ @itshaileyn @millavalntyne
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taestefully-in-luv · 4 years ago
Text
Always You | JJK (Drabble#2)
Summary: Jungkook is sick and needs your love.
Pairing: Always You!Jungkook x female reader
Genre: fluff, implied smut.
Word count: 2.2k
Warnings: none really! enjoy
Notes: no smut in this one! I’m surprised at myself lol Enjoy:)
Taglist: @seagulljk
© taestefully-in-luv
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
You are the definition of exhausted. Work was hectic today to say the least, you didn’t think all these cookie orders would come out of thin air like the way they did today. You and your coworkers are so god damn tired but still decided that you guys were going to hit a bar to celebrate that the day is over. You were going to at least. That is until you were on your way to your car when your phone started buzzing with incoming messages.
Jungkook 9:24pm
Baby I am dying I think I am actually dying
Jungkook 9:24pm
Is it normal to have hallucinations while on nyquil
Jungkook 9:25pm
Bc I keep thinking you’re here and your gorgeous lips are on my dick
Jungkook 9:25pm
Oh my goodddd I am dying, I need you
Jungkook 9:25pm
I need you
You look at your screen and frown
Jungkook mentioned this morning he was feeling sort of
under the weather. But now he’s talking about dying? While you are stubborn while sick, Jungkook is quite the opposite. He’s needy, wants attention and will pretty much do anything you ask.
y/n 9:27pm
Do I need to come take care of you?
Jungkook 9:27pm
Yes:( please come home

“y/n!” Jade jogs up to you, stopping when she gets to you and your car. “Want to ride together?”
“Ah,” you bite down on your bottom lip, “Actually my boyfriend is sick and—”
“You can say ‘Jungkook’” Jade rolls her eyes playfully, “But I get it, saying ‘boyfriend’ is fun, huh?”
You blush, feeling embarrassed. “Yeah, well. Jungkook is kind of sick and he’s such a baby when he’s like this and—”
“No need to explain.” She smiles, “Go. Next time,” she promises. “But you owe me a drink for leaving me with these fools. Hazel is apparently meeting us too, and you know how Adam gets.” She teases, “So, you owe me.”
“Noted.” You laugh, “See you later, Jade.”
You get inside your car, turning the ignition on when your phone starts buzzing again, this time a phone call from none other than your boyfriend.
“Hello?” you bring the phone to your ear. “Jungkook?”
“Baby.” Jungkook drags out the word in a whine, “Please bring me more medicine.” He softly begs. You have to admit he does sound pretty pathetic. You can’t help but pity him as he starts dramatically coughing on the other side of the line.
“And please hurry. I need you. Need you to cuddle me and kiss me. I think your kisses could possibly cure me.”
“I’m about to leave work right now,” you confirm, “Which meds should I get you? What are you feeling exactly?”
“I’m feeling so
so in love with you.” He slurs from his drowsy state, then starts giggling.
“Jungkook.” You deadpan. “What are your symptoms?”
“It’s just a cold.” He says, “I think it’s what Jimin had a few days ago. That bastard passed it to me.”
“And you want me to kiss you?!” you laugh, “I’m not trying to get sick.”
“No, no. Don’t worry baby, our power of love will fight against it.”
“You are so
” you begin laughing again, your blush deepening. “I’ll be home in like 30 minutes, okay? Think you’ll be alive when I get there?”
“Your love keeps me alive.” He teases, “See you soon. Love you.”
“Love you, bye.” You bring the phone down and click the end button. The AC is blowing in your face, cooling you from the warmth that had crept on your cheeks while talking to Jungkook. It’s unbelievable that he’s able to make you blush like this, like as if this was completely brand new like you haven’t known him for years.
~~~~~~
The apartment is completely dark when you walk in and also completely quiet. Did Jungkook fall asleep? Did that NyQuil finally do its job? You set the bag of meds down on the breakfast table and turn on the kitchen light. You walk into the kitchen and grab a glass from the cabinet to fetch you some water, it’s nice and cold as if travels down your throat. It feels nice
 the dark, quiet apartment—you need the rest after today. You think you’re about to go find a sleeping Jungkook and get some sleep yourself when you feel two strong arms wrap around your waist.
“You’re finally here.” Jungkook whispers, “I waited all day for you.” He whines and you smile for him even though he can’t see.
“All day?” you ask, “Should I have left work to come take care of you?” you tease.
“Yes,” he responds shamelessly. “I missed you so much
I think that’s why I just got sicker throughout the day.” He tightens his hold on you but immediately loosens his grip from how weak he feels.
“Come to bed.” He commands and you spin around in his grasp to face him.
“I need to shower and get ready first.” You explain and he looks at you with sad, tired eyes.
“No.” he pouts, “Who cares? Just change and come to bed.”
“Jungkook.” You chuckle. “I worked hard today, I need a shower.”
Jungkook brings you into his chest and he inhales you, taking in your scent and he melts.
“You smell fine, y/n.”
“I smell like cookies.”
“Smells good.”
“Fine, let’s go to bed.”
Jungkook’s sleepy face lights up and he turns your body around so your back is flush against his chest and he holds on to you.
“Lead the way.” He chirps, “I’m not letting go.”
“Jungkook
” you whine as you try walking forward and he follows you while holding on to you as tight as his tired body possibly can.
You two walk into your shared bedroom and he finally drops his arms to his side and makes his way into bed. You go to your drawer and pull out one of his t shirts
you slip off your work clothes for the day and drag the t shirt of your body.
“Cutie.” Jungkook comments as he lays back and watches you change.
“Oh shit, I forgot to grab your meds. I’ll be right back.” You say making Jungkook frown. You make your way back into the kitchen and grab the baggy full of medicine plus a glass of water and walk back into the room when you notice Jungkook dozing off.
“Babe?” you whisper and his eyes immediately shoot open.
“Come cuddle me.” He weakly pats the spot next to him and you smile.
“Take these first.”
“Yes mam.”
He looks up at you with his beautiful doe eyes, a look of submission written all over his face.
“These first.” You hand him two different pills as you sit on the edge of the bed and he swallows them down quickly while staring into your eyes.
“Now these.”
Jungkook nods his head while taking another two pills.
“Any more?” he asks quietly.
“That’s it for your meds.”
“Wrong.” He states. “I need the most powerful medicine of all.” He gives you a soft smile, “Need a kiss from my baby
please, please kiss me. Missed your lips all day.”
“Jungkook
”
“Your kiss will cure me, I’m sure of it.” He whispers softly. “All I need is you to be okay.”
Your eyes widen at his cute confession, he’s so god damn sleepy—you can tell. His eyes are barely staying open but he just wants to be with you. He is trying his hardest to stay awake because he missed you so much throughout the day.
“Please.” He quietly begs. “Need you.”
You search his eyes and find nothing but love in them, you can’t help but beam at him. One kiss can’t hurt you, right?
You scoot closer to him on the bed, your hands finding themselves in his Jungkook’s hair as you softly bring his face closer to you.
“One kiss.” You promise and Jungkook nods his head slowly with a dopey grin on his face.
“We’ll see about that.” He says under his breath and you laugh while leaning in closer to his face.
You lean in until his breaths hit your lips, your lips just barely touching his and he grows weaker at the contact.
“Please.” He begs again, his words hitting your mouth. “Please.”
You peck his lips softly, just giving him a slow kiss. He kisses back, his lips moving against yours so tenderly it makes you melt. You can tell he has no energy but he continues to kiss you. He slants his mouth over yours and tries to deepen the kiss, you tilt your head and give him a better angle. You said one kiss but

Suddenly, you feel the wetness of his tongue poking out, trying to find its way between your lips. You open your moth just a little wider to give him access to your own tongue, he slides his in your mouth and slowly caresses his with yours. He releases a long, soft moan and you hate that you get so turned on hearing him. This isn’t a moment to get turned on, this is a sweet, tender moment.
Jungkook slips his tongue out and begins pecking your lips again, a little faster than before. But then he pulls back, his breaths nice and heavy.
“I’m so dizzy.” he says with his eyes closed.
“Me too.” You admit, feeling quite breathless yourself.
“No
I mean, like, literally. I don’t feel good.” He breathes out, “Kissing you, I think took all the energy I have left
what are you like a succubus or something?” he jokes.
“Baby, you need to sleep.”
“Snuggle with me, please.” He pats the spot next to him again and you get up and walk over to that side of the bed. You slip underneath the sheets and move your body close to his. You can feel all his heat radiate off his body and you frown
he must have a fever.
“Let’s sleep, my love.” You say but Jungkook weakly shakes his head.
“Wanna hear about your day.” He sinks deeper into the covers and lays his head on your chest, wrapping his arms around your waist.
“It was busy, we had what felt like a million orders today. Yoongi even came by but left because we were so busy.”
“Mhm.” He nuzzles his face into your breasts, “Did you think of me today?” he asks.
“I always think of you.” You admit.
“I thought of you so much today.” He says between heavy sighs, “Missed you so much.” He squeezes your body tighter. “I don’t think I can be without you for very long.”
You feel your heart pinch in your chest
because

“You can. You’re just a baby.” You tease.
“No, I really don’t think I can. I felt myself grow weaker every moment I was without you.” He huffs into your chest. You caress his back as he speaks, his words becoming more and more slurred and distant from on another. He’s so tired.
“You love me that much?” you get out in a whisper and it’s silent for a few moments, you think maybe he finally fell asleep until you hear him sigh out.
“I literally don’t love anyone as much as I love you.”
You keep quiet for a few moments too long because after around a minute or so you hear Jungkook lightly snoring into your chest
you can’t help but smile down at him. He’s wrapped his entire body around you, holding you, squeezing you. You caress his back some more and start to feel yourself fall asleep as well. Your eyes getting heavier and heavier until the world becomes dark.
~~~~~
“Good morning!” You feel Jungkook’s breath on your ear, you begin to open your eyes, blinking lazily at your surroundings.
“Morning?” you question since it’s still dark in the room. “It’s still night?” you ask.
“It’s like 5am.” Jungkook states. Your eyes finally begin adjusting in the darkness and you notice Jungkook looks ten times better. He still looks tired but he has more life.
“Your kiss cured me, if that’s what you are thinking about.” He smiles that bunny smile and you laugh.
“I thought it drained you of your life?” you sit up on your elbows, “That I’m a succubus?”
“No, it helped me sleep so it could work its love magic on me and now I feel almost all the way better.”
“Almost?” you quirk a brow and he chuckles.
“I think I need more from you to make me all the way better.” He wiggles his brows at you and sends you a wink.
“What more do you need?” you lean forward and peck his lips, but you linger in his space. He smiles against your mouth and kisses you again.
“I think my hallucinations were actually visions of the future.”
You tilt your head, trying to remember what his text said about hallucinations when realization hits you.
“You need my lips wrapped around your cock?”
“I think that’s the ultimate cure.” He kisses you again, “Don’t you think?”
“You’re so needy.” Your lips move over his sensually, your tongue making its way into his mouth. He whimpers into your mouth when he feels your hand grab a hold of his hardening member. He pulls away from you and smiles softly.
“I’ll always need you.”
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fbfh · 4 years ago
Text
I think you've horribly misread the situation [shitty roommate pt 2] - leo x reader
wc: 2.3k
genre: contemporary drama, you're definitly going to get second hand embarrassment, cozy fluff
pairing: leo x reader, attempted isabella x leo
reader: gender neutral, they/them
requested: hell yeah
warnings: mild swearing, roommate tries to steal your man once again, mentions of various mainstream vampire media (twilight, the vampire diaries etc.), brief mention of castlevania (even though i haven't seen it yet lol), breif mention of videogames and assassins creed, very mild delusion (roommate is secretly convinced leo is a vampire that's in love with her), attempted age gap relationship (she's 17 and leo's 19, he shuts that down real fast), very bad poetry
summary: You and Leo are both looking foward to spending a long weekend together, and Leo is determined not to let anything interrupt it, even if it means turning down your roommate's attempts to seduce him in the kitchen.
a/n: absolutley no hate or shade or judgement to anyone who has the same or similar traits as isabella!!!!!! at her core she's annoying because she's the antagonist, not bc of any isolated trait or traits
also she's shitty cause she keeps trying to steal your boyfriend?????
Edit: I forgot to mention before, but this is a college au where you're both still demigods, so you went to camp and on quests and stuff together
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This weekend is going to be all about recharging. Recharging from the ridiculous back to back closing and opening shifts at work, recharging from having to redo that stupid project twice because your professor couldn’t decide on a clear way to define the criteria, and recharging from Isabella having her townie friend Regan over almost non stop to “completely shake up her look” as she put it.
Between the constant presence of someone you’d barely consider an acquaintance and Big Time Rush’s self titled album blasting on repeat out of her giant airpod shaped speaker, it’s been harder than usual to get in some effective self care. You have no idea how many more times you can hear the phrase “I’m going for Jade West meets Elena Gilbert, with just a little Buffy Summers” before you lose your fucking mind.
Thankfully, the hard part is almost over. There’s some minor holiday tomorrow on friday, so you and Leo both have a three day weekend ahead of you, which you intend to spend entirely together. You planned ahead, frontloading homework, chores, errands, and everything you could think of to remove anything that isn’t cuddling or playing video games and watching netflix together from your horizon.
This includes going straight from work to the grocery store to stock the fridge and get any snacks you and Leo want. You had texted him a while ago asking for anything he was craving, and head into the store with a concrete list. After a while, you circle around some aisles, avoiding the check out.
“I feel like I’m forgetting something,” you muse, knowing it’s untrue, but hoping to trigger a memory anyway. You can’t put it off any longer, finally checking out and heading back to your apartment. You’d be lying if you said you weren’t avoiding Isabella just a little.
You know bringing in all these groceries would be way easier with Isabella and possibly Regan’s help, but you just don’t have the social energy to talk to anyone, much less her, right now. By some miracle, you bring everything in yourself, and hope to get it put away before you see Isabella.
You turn to the freezer, putting away the ice cream. When you turn back around, you’re suddenly met face to face with Isabella, who has opened one of the boxes and is picking at a pastry.
“Hey girlie,” she says, elongating the hey.
“Hey,” you reply lethargically, putting the last of the groceries away. She looks at the pastry in her hand like she’s just noticing it.
“Sorry, I can’t help it, I’m italian.” She smiles, endeared by her own behavior. You have no idea what being italian has to do with asking before you open a box of your roommate’s food, but this really isn’t out of character for her. She brings up the fact that she’s half italian more than Lele Pons blames her behavior on being latina.
She’s wearing sweatpants that say chaser on the leg in red and gold varsity font, and a tight tee shirt that says “it’s okay to love them both” with silhouettes of the male love interests from one of the vampire shows she always watches. You collect the plastic bags to put in recycling, and see a piece of paper on the counter.
It reads as follows:
Drowning in my mind
No one hears me cry
Who was I before society
Before society put me in a pink dress
And handed me blonde hair dye
And told me to lose ten pounds or be labeled a freak?
The happiest people cry the most
Let the lyrics be your story
But I’m not like the other skinny blonde pretty girls
I’m
Different
-b.g. xox
You hold back a sigh.
“I think this is yours.” you say, handing it to her.
“Oh, it’s just some of my poetry I left lying around, that’s so embarrassing.”
I know, you think, you do that all the time.
“Did you read it?” She asks, hopefully.
“Nope.”
“Thank god, that would have been so embarrassing. My poetry is something really
 deep, and personal to me.”
“Uh huh. Hey, I’m going to be doing a lot of self care this weekend, so-”
“Oh!” she interjects, eerily similar to Phoebe Buffay - you guess she’s been watching friends again - “I wanted to ask
 is Leo coming over later?” Her voice is riddled with subtext, the expression on her face a little too invested in your answer.
“Uh, yeah. I told you the other day we’re spending the weekend together
”
She cuts you off again, a sudden, intense look on her face.
“When will he be here?”
You check your phone, scrolling through your recent texts.
“By 7 at the latest.” It’s around 6:40 now.
“Oh my god, I have to change,” she rushes back to her room, presumably digging through her recent additions to her closet.
You’re frozen for a minute after the interaction, left with a furrowed brow and the beginnings of a headache. You blink, then choose to reschedule processing why she feels the need to change for your boyfriend to a more convenient time. That’s enough of that for today. You don’t care what else happens, you’re not talking to anyone besides Leo for at least the rest of the day. You retreat to your room to finally shower and change into something comfy. As you pass by Isabella’s room, you hear her talking to Regan.
“...There’s something almost
 supernatural about him.”
You bite back a laugh.
“Do you think he’s a
” Regan begins, ending the sentence with something too quiet to hear, but you’d bet almost any organ she said vampire.
So close. So, so close, and yet
 here you are.
Not much later, Leo texts you to let you know he’s here. You read his text, and run out to hug him in the living room before even typing a reply. He picks you up, and spins you around. The embrace is warm and fulfilling and familiar, and you wish it would last forever.
“Hi, Sparky.” you murmur into his neck.
“Estrella
” he says, rocking you back and forth gently and pressing a kiss into your jawline, “I missed you so much.” He punctuates the sentence with another kiss, this one to your lips, and you smile more genuinely than you have all day. You’re about to agree when you remember the good news you’ve been saving to tell him in person.
“Guess what I got on sale for like, half off,” you start, excitedly, continuing at his invested expression, “the Assassin’s Creed bundle I showed you!”
“No way,” he starts, and you nod.
“I’ll go get everything set up, drinks are in the kitchen!” He watches you retreat into your room, disbelieving how he could possibly get someone as perfect as you to fall for him. He’s not going to question his luck. He grabs a couple caffeinated sparkling ices, and meets you in your room, setting down his bag and grabbing some comfy clothes to change into.
As you both get settled in, you fill each other in on all the ridiculous shit you’ve been through this week. You finally conclude the bizarre - yet somehow standard - Isabella escapades.
“So I will be avoiding all contact as much as possible,” you laugh.
“Yeah, no shit,” he agrees, “Consider me your human buffer.” You thank him, hugging him again and pressing a kiss to his lips.
The next couple hours are spent cuddling and finishing season 4 of Castlevania. Both reeling from the season finale, you agree this is a good place to take a break, get some food, and decide what game you should start with. It’s already 10pm, which most people would consider too late for dinner, but you have all weekend to fuck up your sleep schedules.
“Let’s review,” Isabella says, holding up two red lipsticks. She turns to Regan. “Which one?”
“That one,” Regan says, pointing to the one on the left, then turns to her list, and continues. “Here’s what we know; we’ve never seen him eat, and he never seems tired. He’s really smart-”
“Almost too smart,” Isabella adds, selecting black rose dangle earrings from her jewelry. Regan agrees, and continues.
“He’s almost hypnotically attractive, and his smile is a little too dazzling.”
“There’s something
 supernatural about him. Like he’s not
 all human.”
Regan writes this down.
“Plus he’s always wearing black and red, and those flowy button up shirts? It’s all adding up, Ree. That dream that someone was outside my window, the ring, everything
” She says, referencing the black and red cocktail ring she’d found with her stuff when she’d first moved, “I’m not saying it’s definite, just that
 there’s a chance.”
“What about
” Regan says hesitantly, nodding toward your room.
“Please,” she scoffs, “he’s only with them to get close to me, like Damon and Caroline. Edward couldn’t have just approached Bella out of the blue, he had to infiltrate her friend group first, to seem less suspicious. Not to sound mean or anything, but they really don’t seem like the type someone
 like him
 would choose.” her voice gets dreamy when she mentions him.
In spite of having seen most mainstream vampire media almost as many times as Isabella, Regan still considers her the expert on these things, and decides not to point out that Edward didn’t infiltrate Bella’s friend group. Maybe it comes up in one of the retellings she hasn’t read yet.
“So, what now?”
Isabella sets down her lipstick, and turns to her friend.
“I tell him.”
Regan’s eyes widen.
“You’re going to tell him you know?”
“No
 not yet. It’s too soon, we don’t have enough evidence. I’m going to tell him I know he’s in love with me, then once he’s secure in our relationship... we’ll see where it goes.”
She stands up, assessing herself in the mirror. She chose her outfit carefully; short red dress with black roses and black mesh collar, black rose bracelet to match her earrings, snug faux leather jacket, and black stiletto ankle booties with a very skinny heel, the zipper on the outside gold, not silver. She fluffs her wavy hair and turns towards the door. She looks back one more time, holding onto the doorway.
“Wish me luck.”
Leo enters the kitchen, seeing Isabella already there, leaning against the counter seductively. She’s wearing an outfit and jewelry this late at night that makes Leo wonder if she’s going to an emo tea party. He puts the takeout in the microwave. She’s still staring at him.
“Uh
 hey.”
She lets out a dainty giggle, looking him up and down.
“... Hi.”
At a loss for words, and really wanting the awkward silence to be over, he continues, “Did you need something?”
“What I need,” she walks closer to him, tracing her finger over his collar, “is you.”
What the fuck?
His brain seems to stall for a moment, and she uses this opportunity to continue.
“I know why you’re here. I know that you’re only using them to get closer to me. I know-”
“Woah-”
“That you’re in love with me.”
Okay, double what the fuck.
She takes his stunned silence as shyness, and steps closer, putting her arms around his shoulders.
“You don’t need to play so coy, I-”
This time she’s the one that gets cut off. He grabs her arms and gently steps away, trying to make it abundantly clear that he’s not into this.
“Woah, okay, slow down. First of all, you’re 17 and I’m turning 20 in a couple months, so that’s a hard no. Second, I don’t know where you got this idea, but I am not dating them to get closer to you. We’ve known each other since we were like, 15, and have been through everything together. I’ve only known you for a couple months. I love them. Probably more than I’ve loved anything ever. I thought that was pretty obvious.”
He doesn’t want to be mean, he really doesn’t, but he can tell from the look on her face that she still thinks this is all part of some game.
“So why don’t I ever see you eat? Why are you so smart, and always up at night? I know what you are.”
He has to physically hold back a laugh. He takes a step back, and places his hands on the counter.
“Isabella, I have adhd. And I’m literally an engineering student. Why wouldn’t I be smart and have a shitty sleep schedule?”
She starts to protest, and he pulls out the reheated take out from the microwave.
“And for the record, I do eat.”
Exiting the kitchen quickly and retreating back to your room, he hands you your food.
“I got the game set up!” you say excitedly.
“Nice!”
You take one look at his face and can tell something happened. He sees this, and continues.
“I just had a very
 interesting interaction with Isabella,” before he finishes the sentence, your head is already in your hands. You let out a groan.
“What did she do?” you mutter from behind your hands.
He pulls you into his lap, rubbing your back.
“I’m not totally sure,” you laugh, “but I think she thinks I’m secretly in love with her
” you’re both laughing before he can even finish the sentence.
“No
” you laugh, “no fucking way
”
“Believe me, I put an end to that as soon as it started.”
“Oh, I do.”
He runs his hand over your back, and you’re quiet for a moment.
“You know,” he continues, “I think getting our own place has definitely moved up the priority list.”
You couldn’t agree more.
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iwaisuke · 4 years ago
Text
confessions; but not remembering it
ft. kita shinsuke, sakusa kiyoomi x sick fem!reader
genre: fluff
masterlist
a/n: this has been sitting in my drafts for a while and then i rushed bc i was getting tired 🙃 also. sakusa's is a little ooc. sorry ab that
-» ˚➙͎۫ÛȘ⋆
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» the clean yet musty smell of rain filled the gym as the boys practiced. it was a surprisingly humid and rainy spring day today here in the country side of hyogo
» "achoo" you had been sneezing and coughing all day. you also had a terrible headache but took some medicine to see if it would help. the spring allergies really getting to you
» you didnt reay have the time to be worrying about yourself. As a 2nd year manager of the inarizaki team, (recommend by suna) and the boys working so hard practicing for nationals there was no way you'd let this little cold get in the way. you had to work just as hard as everyone else!
» "hold on, im about to hang up your jerseys to dry"
» "i got you guys some fresh towels!"
» "i can run and grab that coach. im headed that way anyways"
» the coach called for a short break to rest up for a bit. everyone was sore and exhausted from practicing every day. "here. i filled your water bottles up!" handing them to all the boys. "y/n you're all wet" akagi sounded concerned.
» "hm? oh its alright. I'll dry off in a minute. i took the shortcut to the drinking fountain to refill your waterbottles instead of taking the long way" you nonchalantly said. "so you ran through the rain like an idiot?" suna threw a clean towel over your damp hair and ruffled it. "suna!! stop!! you're gonna ruin my hair"
» "like i said. its alright" you reassured the boys.
» kita, on the other hand had noticed your fatigue. although he wasnt as perceptive on peoples feeling and thoughts as well as others, he could easily pick up signs like yours. he admired you dearly for how hard you always work for the team. how you willingly did anything to make them smile. how you always put others first before yours. needless to say, he had a bit of a crush on you.
» "l/n san. i think you should take a break too. there's no need for you to be running around for us while we're resting" kita assured you. "i still have a few things left on my list to do.. but afterwards I'll take a break!" kita let out a sigh. you were stubborn sometimes and kita knew you were the kind of person to not stop until you're finished.
» "I'll be right back. i gotta grab the laundry"
» making an excuse to leave, your heart was beating fast. you knew kita's words were the kind he'd say to anyone, but it made your heart feel fuzzy when he'd look out for you.
» the stone cold captain who you thought he was, actually was so kind. he was just a little awkward like you, and a little blunt with what he said sometimes. but you learned the great qualities he carries and how much he actually cares about others well being. he was a hard worker and you couldnt help but absentmindedly fall for the captain.
» running up the stairs to the second floor of the gym, you felt a shift in your step. head becoming dizzier than it was just 5 minutes ago. legs trembling, you started falling before feeling a presence behind.
» kita's arm wrapped around your waist, supporting you in efforts to not letting you fall over. "i told you to rest l/n san" kita said sternly. "you wont benefit anyone if you keep overworking like this."
» you knew kita was right, but you really didnt want to rest knowing you'll be letting the team down by not working hard.
» "i promise I'll rest as soon as im done with this one thing" pleading with kita. he let out a sigh, knowing you really wouldnt until you did finish so he allowed you to do so.
» finishing grabbing all of the dry jerseys and bringing them downstairs to pass out to everyone, you didnt really notice atsumu and osamu spiking volleyballs at each other until aran yelled
» "y/n! watch out!" honestly, you were too tired to move out of the way so you figured, it do be like that sometimes, and allowed the ball to hit you.
» or... so you had planned the ball to hit you.
» kita stood in front, blocking the impact of the spike that you had prepared yourself for. there was agitation in kita's eyes. more than you usually noticed when then twins were miss behaving. concern washing over, he looked you straight in the eyes
» "... is there something wrong kita san?" lifting up his hand to your forehead, he let out a sigh. "why didnt you tell me earlier you had a fever", then walking over to the coach meanwhile atsumu and osamu come over to apologise for being reckless.
» "get your stuff. we're going home" kita said bluntly.
» "huh? but practice is-"
» "please l/n san. for me"
» kita would only take yes for an answer this time. no if's ands or buts. so here you were, walking home with kita. only the sound of raindrops hitting your shared umbrella being heard.
» muscles starting to ache a little more and your legs becoming more tired than they were when you left the gym, you began to walk a little slower every step
» "get on my back l/n" "its ok kita san, i can walk. its already enough that you're walking me home" "i didnt ask if you wanted to. im telling you to"
» you couldnt tell if it was the fever that made your face warmer or if it was kita's words. nonetheless, you got on kita's back. he was a lot stronger than he looked and you couldnt help but stifen at being so close to your own crush like this.
» "relax. I'll make sure you get home." he reassured. you leaned into his back, warmth seeping in, your eyes began to feel heavy.
» "kita san" "yes?" "thank you for always watching out for me"
» a comfortable silence was met as the sound of rain filled your ears.
» "kita san" "hm?" "did you know..." your voice softened "i like you a lot kita san"
» did he hear you correctly? if he wasnt paying attention he wouldve missed what you had said, being drowed out through the pitter patter of water. now his heart thumping louder than ever before.
» "l/n san-" he was about to go on but was met with the gentle rise and fall of your chest and the soft snores of you on his back, knocked out from exertion. kita let out a light chuckle, finally relieved you were resting.
» you had missed the next day of school, but when you came back the whole volleyball team bombarded you with love.
» "WE'RE A FAILURE TO NOT NOTICE YOU FEELING SICK" atsumu cried. "how could we let our one and only precious manager get ill for taking care of us" akagi, clearly dissapointed in himself. "please let us know when we can take care of you too y/n" aran said.
» "its no big deal. really!" waving your hands in defense. "it was just a small cold. but i do have a question though"
» all the boys gathered around to hear what you had to say
» "how did i get home?? i really dont remember what happened after i almost got hit by atsumu"
» it shocked the guys honestly. you genuinely didnt remember a single thing due to your fever. "wait? you don't remember kita taking you home?" suna replied, your face becoming red. "k-kita san took me home-?" "yah. he left in the middle of practice to do so" osamu added.
» immediately, you got up to find the captain that apparently took you home the other day. he was in the storage closet cleaning and grabbing the equipment for todays practice.
» "kita san" "oh. l/n. glad you're feeling better" his smile brightened the musty closet. "about that, im sorry for troubling you and having you take me home the other day. i honestly dont remember what happened after i almost got hit by atsumu. my mind was really fuzzy that day, but im truly thankful for you going out of your way for me. it really means a lot"
» kita was dumbfounded. you really dont remember? "no need to apologize l/n. it was my responsibility as a captain. and afterall, what good would i be if i couldnt even take care of the person who means the most to me"
» your heart raced. 'person who means the most to me' ? cheeks blushing a rosy pink, you were internally thanking the musty store room from being dim.
» with arms full of equipment, kita walked by you and stopped.
» "by the way l/n san. did you know?"
» ears perking up at the vague yet familiar line
» "i like you a lot too l/n san"
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» now we all know sakusa HATES germs and for the past week and a half, he's been telling you to keep up with washing your hands, wearing a mask at all times even when you eat omi it doesnt work like that. pls especially since you are prone to getting sick easily no matter how hygenic you are. your immune system just hated you. PERIODT
» you remembered sakusa scolding you for running out of hand sanitizer and then the next day you were out of commission. bed ridden with laryngitis, cough, slight fever, the whole works. it was like your body was making fun of you or something
» you texted komori, asking him to take notes in class for you and relay homework information while you were at home resting up. but there was one request you had and made komori PROMISE.
» DO NOT TELL SAKUSA YOU GOT SICK
» "he's probably gonna notice your absence y/n. he'll find out about it either way"
» "well if you dont tell him then he wont know. its not like he even cares about where i am like that"
» "thats what you might think. but i know he's gonna say something i can garuntee it"
» the next day at school, sakusa did notice your presence missing. it was quieter not having a 3rd person in the group of friends. not having you around to talk to him when komori was gone.
» pulling out his phone to text you, he asked where you were that day.
» "on a family trip :D !!! forgot to tell you, but I'll tell you all about it when i come back!" you wrote, attaching an old selfie of a different trip you went on to make it more believable.
» you had hoped this silly cold would get better in a day, but soon that day turned into 2 and then 3 and then 4... you pretty much missed the whole week of school at that point
» Friday rolled around and komori was on his phone all day. sakusa noticed his cousin fidget in his chair more than usual and it irked him to see him like that
» "what's with you today?" one eye raised, sakusa finally asked. "uhhh nothing really" komori wasnt very good at keeping secrets lets just start off with that, but he was trying his best.
» "well clearly somethings wrong. you're fidgeting." "well haven't you noticed somethings been different all week?" komori hinted
» sakusa sat there in thought. nothing's been different? he ate the same breakfast he usually does every morning. all his studies have been well. there were no tests this week so there was no reason to be anxious like komori was and even if there was, he would've done well anyways.
» "just tell me what it is." sakusa was starting to get annoyed. "y/n..." komori started. "y/n?" "do you know where she's been this week?"
» did you not tell komori about your family trip? you usually told komori everything, but then again you didn't tell him either until he asked you about it.
» "she said shes on a trip?" he nonchalantly said. komori's eyes started watering. "A TRIP TO THE HOSPITAL THATS WHAT IT IS" he blurted out. komori didnt mean to let it slip , he was just so worried about your well being.
» "hospital?? what are you talking about. did she get injured on her trip?" "no omi. shes been sick all week and her mom just texted me saying she went to the hospital today because shes had a fever for 3 days straight. there is no family trip"
» sakusa's heart shattered. you were sick and didnt even tell him?
» before both he and komori knew it, his legs were running faster to get to the hospital than he had ever imagined he could ever run.
» and there you were. fast asleep in a bed with an IV drip. your face flushed, forehead sweaty and shallow breaths escaping your chapped lips. you were a hot mess but sakusa didnt care. stepping to your bedside to greet your mother she explained to him that she had to go to work and asked if he could watch over you until she gets back.
» sakusa said yes without even hearing the whole thing. his heart and mind saying yes to whatever it took to get you to feel better.
» gosh how he hated hospitals, but what he hated even more was the fact that you were in the hospital and he didnt even know.
» the doctor came in for their evening round and ensured sakusa that you were indeed getting better! your fever had broken not too long ago and your body was working extra hard to heal itself up!
» "is there anything i can do to help?" sakusa asked. he felt helpless in this situation just watching your face distort in uncomfort every now and then, and coughing your lungs out.
» patting sakusa's shoulder, the doctor told him that just being here for you is enough. "you gotta be a strong boyfriend for her alright son? she'll be able to go home tomorrow first thing in the morning if her fever doesnt come back"
» sakusa slumped in his chair at your bedside, the doctors words ringing through his head. 'boyfriend huh?' he thought to himself. "if i was her boyfriend..." he whispered to himself, "i would be a failure for not even knowing my girl was sick..."
» to kiyoomi, you were beautiful. even now in this sad state you were in. deep down he locked these growing feelings he had for you inside of him because he always felt like you were a better match with someone else and after this stunt you pulled of lying to him about going on a family trip, it only made him feel worse.
» it was now night time and you finally began to stir in your sleep, the fever finally gone. sakusa reached out to move some hair that was stuck to your face, fingers tracing the outline of your jaw. your eyes slowly opened and met with his dark orbs.
» "y/n?" "saku- wait this is just a dream. omi wouldn't be here. he hates hospitals" you let out a forced laugh and then a sigh through your sore throat.
» you reached out to sakusa's hands that were resting on the side of your bed. "omi would never let me hold his hand because he'd say im passing germs to him so hopefully dream omi wont be the same" you were aimlessly talking to yourself, not even realizing that this really wasnt a dream.
» he squeezed your hand in return. hoping that you wouldnt let go any time soon. a funny smile appeared on your face just at the thought of him. "even if you're stupid for not realizing how much i like you... i cant wait to see you again omi" you whispered before falling asleep again.
» sakusa didnt know what to do. he sat there frozen in his chair. it was his first time hearing you call him omi. heck. you literally just confessed to the boy. his brain was running wild. groaning in distress he let go of your hand to step out for a breath of fresh air now that you were back asleep.
» it was 5am and your mother came back to the hospital and thanked sakusa for staying by your side. He left in a hurry to make sure you didnt see him there.
» Monday rolled around and sakusa was waiting outside of the school gates for you. he had planned on asking you about your "trip"
» "good morning sakusa!!" your bright and cheery voice rang through his ears. honestly he was trembling inside. the memory of you confessing to him still fresh in his mind.
» "how was your trip?" you stopped dead in your tracks. "haha... it was good !! sorry i forgot to get you a souvenir" you were trying to play it cool but sakusa could tell you were forcing yourself. "i wouldnt want a souvenir from where you came from so its fine" sakusa's words threw you off. "i - im not sure im understanding what you're saying sakusa?"
» you felt a tug on your hand. "dont you mean omi?" his voice husky as he whispered into your ear. cheeks flushed, your brain felt like it short circuted. you've always tried your hardest to not let it slip that you want to call him omi since he hated when people called him that.
» sakusa smirked at your cute reaction he got out of you. letting go of your hand he began to walk into the school leaving you at the gate dumbfounded. "and by the way. you're just as stupid for not realizing how long ive liked you too"
-» ˚➙͎۫ÛȘ⋆
thank you for your order! enjoy~!
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