#(what kinda romcom bullshit--)

[anachronistic-falsehood]

do they just like. live in the superhero compound. where are ur fucking parents. WHERE R UR PARENTS!!!!!!!!

[catella-ars]

Pretty sure there was more art to this but uhhh here’s some contextless “Ridley and Cam discover they share an ex” and Keid and Zen wondering what their problem is idk

[lizzibennet]

my mom’s been telling me my entire life she and my dad met at a bar which BOOOO BORING but today she just casually mentions actually she placed a fuckin ad in the newspaper saying she was ‘a single lady ready to meet the one’ and he was the first to call her and they dated over the phone for like three months before they met n she was like “i was already pretty much in love with him because i adored his laugh on the phone” ????? What kinda 90s romcom bullshit

[biolumien]

Hi!! Your rooftop smoke fic with Hoshina was just superb. 😭💖

Was wondering If could request a scenario where they had been mutually pining for one another. And they'd, on more than one occasion catch each other's eyes across the room. And a handful of people from the Defense Force notices. Cause could they be more obvious?

Whether that would end up angsty or with a happy ending is up to you! I love the way you write for Hoshina. You capture him pretty perfectly haha

Stay safe and healthy!!

notes: omg... thank you for your compliments... it means smsm! uhh... well. this kinda took on a life of its own, i'm sorry. i hope you don't mind ;-;;

say it! come on, say it!

soshiro hoshina x gn!reader alternatively: romcom except then i smacked it so hard with angst at the end. sorry. word count: 2400

“you need to close your mouth when you’re staring.” you feel the ice-cold touch of a can press against your cheek, and you shriek as you stare up at–

“ah, fuck. i’m not staring, narumi,” you mutter, taking the soda can from him. narumi seemed less than convinced, his eyes barely visible from underneath his bangs. 

“o-kay. and you’re totally not ogling hoshina with googly eyes.” narumi cracks open his own soda, taking a long sip from the can. “why don’t you just date already? i’m gonna be honest, i’m sick of you looking at him like that. it’s boring, bland, predictable… fuckin’ hate that will they won’t they bullshit.” 

“i can’t,” you complain dramatically. 

hoshina, from the other side of the room, was talking to captain ashiro while examining some paperwork. occasionally, okonogi would come over, point out some new development, and there’d seem to be another heated debate between the three. you always liked seeing hoshina in his element—whether it be instructing other officers, training with his blades, or awkwardly not making eye contact with him when he spoke to you. 

“like hell you can’t!” narumi hissed, reaching out to put you in a headlock. “stop looking at him like that!” 

“like hell what? who’s looking at who?” 

hoshina had come over, staring at the two of you, right as narumi’s arm was beginning to wrap around your neck. narumi immediately flew back from you as you laughed nervously. 

“uhh, like hell i, umm…” you fumbled for an answer, staring up at hoshina nervously. why had he just come over? why was he looking at you like that? your lips quiver for a moment.

“oh, relax!” hoshina clapped you across the back, laughing. “you look so nervous! like you’ve just confessed you had some very, very personal feelings or something! that’s adorable…” 

let me die, you think furtively as hoshina’s hand brushes your shoulder. narumi’s face was pinched. 

“don’t let narumi bully you too much; he’s just a little lowlife, after all,” hoshina said with teasing venom in his voice. 

“you bitch,” narumi growled. “i have no idea how they see anything in y—” his face paled as the words left his lips, and you think you almost see god for a minute. you hide your face with your hands, waiting for hoshina’s verdict, and you swear that the next moment you get, you were going to make narumi very sorry for spilling your metaphorical, hell, call them literal at this point, guts out in the open. 

“hmm?” hoshina hums. the world fell silent—at least silent to you, in any case, your eardrums pounding in time with your heartbeat. “well—”

“vice captain hoshina!” mina ashiro’s voice was sharp and piercing. “time to go.” 

“huh?” hoshina cocks his head. “ah, of course, captain. be right there!” 

he turned to you and narumi with a small smile, one of his fangs peeking out for a moment before waving his fingers. 

“see you.” he nods his head to you specifically before he turns away. 

you wait until you are absolutely, absolutely sure he’s out of earshot before turning on narumi, throwing your soda can at his head. 

“fuck!” narumi swore. “what the fuck was that for?” 

“you idiot! why did you basically confess to him for me?!” you hiss. “i’m trying to count on you to not run your damn mouth!” 

“hoshina’s an idiot,” narumi says sullenly. “i bet he didn’t even notice.” 

[…]

the walk through the hallway was silent, up until—

“you’re red,” mina says, her hand reaching for her skirt pocket to pull out her phone. 

“stop,” hoshina’s voice is strangled, far more strangled than he’d like it to be. “no, i’m serious. no photos. you’ll need to talk to my PR agent about that.” hoshina’s ears were tinged pink, and he raised his hands to try and hide the flush. 

“hoshina,” okonogi sounded disapproving, “why don’t you just confess already? i’m getting tired watching you get so concerned over them…” 

“ha! confess,” hoshina laughs. “and what good would that do? i’m not exactly peak romance material, you know this…” 

“the only one not noticing that is you, hoshina,” mina mutters. “you get all sullen when they leave and happy when they come back, but you have to act like a… hmm… what does he act like, okonogi?” 

hoshina’s eyes went wide as okonogi hummed. 

“a cat!” okonogi declares emphatically. 

“yes. you’re right,” mina says decisively. “that’s a good fit. you act like a cat about it. you try to—”

“stop. stop it, stop it, i don’t want to hear it. stop analyzing my personality. this isn’t some kind of joke,” hoshina says, his voice sounding more flustered as he went on. “they’re never gonna say yes. it’s stupid. confessing like this… it would only be a burden on all of us.” 

mina and okonogi exchanged a look.

“besides, i’m a bad boyfriend. remember that last girl, from operations,” hoshina laughed. “broke her heart in three seconds flat.” 

“… if i remember correctly, you liked her quite a lot, though,” okonogi said hesitantly. 

“ha! so what if i did?” hoshina asked. “she only just left when i… hm.” his smile seemed to falter somewhat, but he laughed. “it’s fine. it’s fine. i’m fine.” 

behind his back, mina and okonogi exchanged another look. 

but his mind flickered back to his hand on your back, and wondered if you leaning into his touch was a fluke. 

[…]

you stare at hoshina from across the room. he’s eating by himself, half a piece of melon bread in his mouth as he stared down at some papers in his hand. you’d have asked to sit next to him, if only you were braver. but you were a coward, so here you were. you stare down at your own food, tearing off a corner of the red bean bun you were eating, popping it in your mouth. 

your crush on hoshina was about as subtle as a freight train. which is to say, you felt it coming on, and then by the time you’d fully reconciled it, you were already being run over repeatedly. it was just grappling, mostly, with how cool he was, endlessly. 

you wondered what it would be like to live under the intensity of his stare, as it enveloped you whole. 

would it be like a benevolent fire? or would he raze you so wholly that there’d be nothing left? 

you wanted to find out. you wanted to find out, but you were so scared he’d burn you before you could even get close. but what was important was that hoshina, for sure, didn’t even bother to reciprocate your feelings. that’s what you were so sure of—because why would someone like him give you the pleasure of his time? surely his time was more valuable than wasting it on a nobody like you. 

his intensity, sharpened to a fine point, was better spent figuring out how to permanently eradicate the kaiju threat altogether. 

right?

you sighed miserably. 

“now that sounds like a miserable sound to me,” hoshina’s voice rang out right next to your ear. 

you nearly jumped out of your skin as soon as you heard his voice, too focused for a second on the soft, tickling sensation of his breath against the shell of your ear. your face bloomed bright red, and you immediately backed away from him, your heart pounding loudly in your chest. 

“hoshina!” you stammer. “what—what are you doing?” 

“eating?” hoshina raises his eyebrow, a teasing smirk on his lips. “noticed you were staring. take a picture, by the way, if you want. they do last longer than the momentary glances.” he sat down next to you, continuing to eat.

so he had noticed you staring. 

“s-sorry. for staring,” you say. 

“huh? why are you sorry?” hoshina asks, cocking his head at you, one of his eyes opening a bit wider. “i don’t mind. if i minded, i woulda said something.” your face flushed a little more at his words, and you looked away as he laughed. 

“you really are cute,” he says fondly, reaching out a hand to pat your head.

… huh?

“what?” you ask weakly. 

“huh? did i say something weird?” hoshina asks, the picture perfect image of innocence—or so you’d say, if his eyes weren’t narrowed at you, and the smile on his face a little too much like a smirk, waiting for how you’d react. 

“no…? i guess? it’s just not something i thought you’d say. to me,” you say falteringly, looking away for a moment. 

“mm. i guess i should make a habit of saying it more, huh?” hoshina teases, removing his hand from your head. 

and as you fluster a little more, you curse god for your crush on soshiro hoshina. 

[…]

“you need to quit fucking around,” narumi says, pointing a dumbbell at hoshina in the training room. 

“fucking around? i’m doing nothing of the sort,” hoshina says, that mask of innocence still on his face. narumi’s brow furrows. 

“sure, and you don’t also ogle… you need to get your shit together and confess, or swear to god, i’ll kill one of you. or, hell, why don’t we just kill both of you so i don’t have to fucking look at you?” narumi scoffs, anger spiking in his voice. 

“ha, yeah, maybe if you do that i’ll finally be free from hearing your annoying, grating voice,” hoshina says, prodding narumi in the chest.

“yeah, but then you won’t confess your feelings and then i’ll have to die knowing i broke up a couple that hadn’t even gotten together,” narumi grumbles. “i’m not a monster.”

“huh?” hoshina asks.

narumi looked like he was about to blow a gasket.

“wait, so you didn’t know they reciprocate?”

“i–well, i… hoped?” hoshina says, realizing how stupid he must sound. his mind flit back to your reactions the past few days–hell, the past few weeks? maybe the past few months? “oh. shit.”

“oh. shit. indeed,” narumi mocks. “so, are you going to tell them?”

“i…” hoshina suddenly realized how terrified he was. his face paled, his hand coming up to his mouth. “i… shit. wait. this is–fuck. i…” he ran a hand through his hair, pushing his bangs up past his face, a shaking sigh passing his lips. “no. this is… how would i even begin to explain it? i’m not… i can’t. i’m not–i can’t be a good partner. not in this line of work. my judgement could be compromised! that wouldn’t–”

“your judgement is already compromised,” narumi says, a bared snarl-turned-smile on his lips. “you know, hoshina. this is probably the most interesting you’ve ever been. you’re always facades, niceties. pretended you were untouchable, swimming in that sea of self-loathing and ineptitude. but maybe you’re beginning to live a little, aren’t you?”

hoshina’s eyes widened.

living?

[...]

it’d always come to the worst, you thought. you coughed up a mouthful of blood as another round of rubble began to creak overhead. you tried to force your body to move, and your suit pulsed in response to your movements, attempting to close the bloody gashes across your body from the kaiju attack. 

“command, come in,” you gasped out, holding up a shaking hand to your in-ear. you winced as there was only a clicking static in response–was no one coming? were you all alone? were you going to die like this, your limbs barely even able to hold up their own weight even with most of your combat power unleashed? is this all you were good for? your knees buckled as you collapsed onto the ground, coughing out a mouthful of blood.

were you going to die like this?

you couldn’t.

you didn’t want to.

your vision swam a bit as you coughed out another mouthful of blood, your mind lingering.

hoshina had touched your back right before you’d left, a small smile crossing his face.

“don’t die,” he’d said. 

and here you were, stumbling through the rubble, hurting so badly that you might as well be dead. 

it was utterly and painfully cliche to think about letting hoshina down. you didn’t want to, and yet there was a horrifying possibility that you would. and as you buckled again, collapsing onto your knees, you coughed out another mouthful of blood.

fuck.

“command,” you repeated, in a weaker voice. “please. if someone–if anyone can hear me–i need help. suit damage is–” you cough again, wiping blood from your mouth. “--critical. please.” 

and as your vision swam, you felt a hand press against your shoulder.

“there you are.”

you blinked hard, staring up at the face of soshiro hoshina, who’d pulled his mask off, leaning down to pull you into his arms.

“hoshina,” you whisper. “i’m sorry–i shouldn’t have… i got…”

“why are you apologizing?” hoshina asks, his voice sounding more choked than you’d like it to be.

“i didn’t mean to–i didn’t mean for this to happen.” you think you’re bleeding across hoshina’s suit, across his gloves as you press your head against his shoulder. 

hoshina laughs desperately, wetly.

“you didn’t mean to–of course you didn’t mean to!” hoshina protests. “the attack was more than any of us could have predicted–of course you didn’t mean for any of this happen–i don’t want you to apologize for that.” his hand reaches up to swipe some blood away from your brow. “come on, love. i have to tell you how i feel–that bastard was right, after all. my judgement was compromised from the beginning, around you.” 

“that bastard? narumi?” you ask, coughing a bit. why did it feel so cold? your eyes fluttered for a moment,  “what does he have to do with any of this–”

“i love you,” hoshina says. “i’m sorry it took me this long to tell you. and i’m selfish, for waiting until you’re bloodied, like this, to tell you.” you didn’t like the desperate look in his eyes like he was convinced you were going to die. you leaned up, pressing a kiss to the corner of his mouth.

“you bastard,” you muttered. “couldn’t you have thought up a better time and place for all of this?” 

“no,” hoshina admits. “because i’m selfish, after all.” he smiles at you, the corner of his mouth twitching ever so slightly. “come on. let’s get you to the medbay. i’m not letting you die on me yet.”

“okay,” you whispered weakly. “okay.”

[itendtothinkalot]

another one of those fake dating tropes lol

Summary: a series dedicated to fake dating and for what? idk

Genre: romcom, angst, fluffy

Characters: beomgyu x f!reader soobin x f!reader

Words: too many (15818)

Completed (oneshot)

There were many instances in your life when you felt completely and utterly alone in the world but it was never in the presence of your five overly attached best friends. You didn’t know why the six of you clicked. It could’ve been Kai’s innate sense of wit or Beomgyu’s impeccable timing for comedy. The six of you just did.

Sure, your life had been filled with dullness more so than the average person but with friends like these idiots by your side, you were certain you were considered one of the luckiest people on planet Earth.

You loved being independent, your time away from all the drama and constant yelling, you could go on days at a time without seeing a single person. But somewhere deep in your heart, you also yearned for love. Romantic love, of course. None of that platonic ‘friendship is magic’ bullshit that Taehyun would feed you when you’d whine about being single and how you’d probably die alone with 3 cats. 

You wanted romantic love. A love that was undying. A love that could only be filled with physical and emotional intimacy. A love that you unfortunately have only ever felt for one of your best friends. 

Ahh, unrequited love, a curse that had been bestowed upon you by one of your worst enemies, Cupid.

“I swear to God, you’re gonna get kicked out by Mr Kim.” Kai hushed, pressing his face against Beomgyu. His eyes continuously darted between the backroom where your manager had situated himself then back at Beomgyu, who had his dirty Nike shoes propped up on the barstool next to him.

“First of all, watch the spit, you frog. Also,” Beomgyu scoffed, his lips in between the straw he was viciously nibbling on, wiping the spit that landed on his face from Kai’s aggressive hushing. “We’re paying customers, are we not?” 

“Gyu, the milkshake was free.” You said, an eyebrow raised. “I should know. I made it for you and pretended to key it in so our manager wouldn’t know.”

“Well, you should’ve charged me for it.” Beomgyu challenged as he played with the rigid rim of his paper cup; his teeth marks visible. 

“You’re a broke law student who can’t even afford cup noodles. I had to pay for your last meal and I’m working in a cafe.” Kai added, his hands still busy wiping the counters. He was doing this so the manager wouldn’t call him out for doing nothing (again).

“Shame on the two of you. Inviting me down here so you could humiliate me in front of Soobin and peepaw.” Beomgyu shook his head gesturing to Yeonjun who had been catching up on his Zs during the whole argument. Lifting his head, Yeonjun flicked his fingers at the back of Beomgyu’s neck before enveloping his head back in his arms. 

“Ow!” Beomgyu said through his gritted teeth, rubbing his neck.

A laugh escaped your lips. You patted Yeonjun’s head, “Being unemployed sure takes a toll on the elderly.” You played along earning a smile from Beomgyu. 

Yeonjun groaned before lifting his head to look you dead in the eye, “You’re getting too complacent for someone who works in a dead-end cafe.” 

“At least I can afford more than just a couple bag of chips. Can you say the same?” You stuck your tongue out. Yeonjun rolled his eyes before sipping on his disgusting left-out-too-long milkshake then resting his head back onto the counter.

“I’m in between interviews.” He mumbled, his face still buried in his arms as he tried to defend what was left of his crumbling dignity. 

“Though bashing Yeonjun is my favourite hobby, he’s not wrong. This place is kinda dead. Isn’t it supposed to be lunch hour?” Soobin brought up, looking around the empty cafe before fixing his eyes on you.

“Well, sometimes during rush hour, I’d forget to put the open sign up so I wouldn’t have to clean more tables. Mr. Kim hasn’t noticed it though. He just thinks his marketing strategy of getting the two of us to give out flyers isn’t working.” Kai mumbled putting air quotes around “forget”.

“Low pay fits you, Kai.” Taehyun finally chimed in. “You really shouldn’t be working in this industry. Or in any industry for that matter.”

“Okay, Mr Trust Fund.” Kai sang. “I’m rich! I don’t need a job! I can spend the rest of my life working for my dad!”

“Cut it out, Kai.” Beomgyu defended Taehyun, placing his arms around the younger male. 

“You’re only defending him because he’s paying your half of the rent!” Huening retaliated.

“That’s not true! I paid the rent last month!” 

“Honestly, you haven’t paid me for 3 months.” Taehyun said, his eyes boring into Beomgyu’s, eliciting a guilty giggle from the Beomgyu.

“Hasn’t it occurred to you that as a rich person, you should and must help the needy?” Beomgyu countered.

“The needy?” Kai sneered, eyes peering through the shaggy long-haired boy.

“Yeah. Me.” Beomgyu deadpanned.

“God, Beomgyu, I will continue paying your half of the rent if you shut up.” Taehyun sighed.

“Truly…a man of good deeds. President Kang! I respect you.” Beomgyu saluted as he wrapped his arms around Taehyun.

“President Kang, can you pay my rent?” Soobin grinned, his hands finding their way to Taehyun’s shoulder. 

“You have a job. Stop leeching off of me.” Taehyun spoke, shrugging Soobin’s arms off.

“I don’t think you can count ass kissing as an actual job.” Yeonjun commented, his head finally up, a mischievous glint in his eyes.

“I don’t kiss my boss’s ass.” Soobin grumbled. 

“Well, you slept with her.” Kai reminded, knocking on Soobin’s forehead, a little mischievous grin plastered across his face. 

Your head perked up at the sudden confession.

“It was a drunk mistake. How’d you even kn- God, I’m never telling you anything again, Beomgyu.” 

“For the record, Kai overheard you telling me through Discord. You should really get a new mic.” Beomgyu said, his mouth filled with stale fries.

Now that piqued your interest. 

“So, Scoobs, you slept with…your boss?” You finally spoke up, your eyebrows furrowed. 

Panic-stricken, Soobin shook his head profusely, “No…no. Not technically.”

“We’re talking technicalities now?” Yeonjun laughed, slapping Soobin’s back.

“So you didn’t?” You queried. It was evident that he was getting more flustered as time passed without an explanation. His red face painfully contrasted with his blonde hair.

“Oh, you don’t know? Well, well, well, looks like you do keep secrets from your favourite friend after all!” Beomgyu retorted.

“I like you all the same. Maybe not Beomgyu right now though.” Soobin cleared his throat before looking at you. His eyes told you he was guilty. Though of course, you weren’t sure. Maybe that’s what you wanted him to feel. 

You didn’t know why it bugged you. Or maybe…you did. But you knew for a fact you didn’t like him sleeping with just about anyone. 

 “I like you all the same!” Beomgyu mimicked annoyingly, “You two and your silly little games, the rooftop meetups, the Friday lunch hour ice creams, the movie nights…we know who you prefer, Soobin or should I say Scooby…” 

Soobin looked at Beomgyu, rolled his eyes and dunked his head then back at you. 

“It was just a one-time thing. We were both drunk and I woke up in her apartment the other day at the Christmas party. It was stupid and I would never do it again.” He explained, specifically to you. You weren’t sure why he was trying so hard to convince you to think otherwise.

“Christmas?” You muttered.

Christmas was just 2 weeks ago. Which would explain why Soobin had backed out on the past 2 Friday lunch hour ice cream sessions. You thought. 

As much as everything was great when you hung out with your friends, it was also just as dreadful hanging out with someone you had the fattest crush on. Shaking your head, you decided just to ignore this minor yet painful information. It was a one-time thing. He said so and you chose to believe it.

Work was finally over. Despite finding out the person you’ve been in love with for the past 2 years had sex with his boss, it was another average day. It wasn’t like you’d never heard of Soobin’s romantic endeavours before. You were used to it but you wouldn’t say you enjoy the awful sting in your heart.

You sighed as your body hit the bed. Your legs were wrapped around in the blanket that Taehyun had got you for your 21st birthday. He had insisted on getting you a whole bed set because you’d been sleeping on the same club penguin bed sheets since you were 11. You initially declined, claiming that you’d be happy with a gift card to the local supermarket since you were running low on cup ramen but then Soobin said something about how much he loved soft neutral-coloured linens and there you were begging Taehyun for the new set he initially offered. You were pathetic. So pathetic you got Taehyun rolling on the floor laughing when you were on your knees for the linen set you had so kindly declined.

Bzzz…

Your thoughts were interrupted.

Soobin: You up? You: Was about to sleep. Soobin: Rooftop in 5? You: Choc milk??? Soobin: In my pockt. Soobin: Pocket*

How Soobin and you met...was a little unconventional. You happened to move right above Soobin’s apartment when he had trudged to your house to complain about the noise you had made the previous night and accused you of having the worst-sounding sex in history of mankind. 

“It’s like if a cat and a dog were-”

You remembered shaking your head, “I’m gonna to have you stop right there. Mr…?”

“Soobin.”

“Ah, Soobin. You see, I would remember having sex last night in this apartment and making questionable mating noises except I moved in…today?” This was followed by a string of apologies mostly from Soobin who had been on his knees. 

From that day on, he had visited your house every single day bearing snacks, hoping the both of you didn’t start on the wrong foot. It eventually blossomed and the both of you became inseparable best friends with him introducing you to the rest of them. 

“You okay?” You asked, your eyelids closing as you tried your hardest to suppress your yawns. You were sleepy, sure, but you didn’t have the heart to tell Soobin you were knackered. Besides, it was Soobin, you had slaved away till 5am cooking his favourite meals to cheer him up when his first-ever girlfriend had broken up with him…you’re not proud of it but you did love the look on his face when he nuzzled into the crook of your neck declaring how much he loved your chicken soup.

You noticed Soobin fidgeting like he was nervous. His eyes danced across the rooftop, at you then at the lawn chairs then at the fairy lights decorating the washed-up rooftop then back at you. You could see him trying so evidently to avoid your gaze. 

“Scooby, are you okay?” You asked again after noticing the look of distress plastered on his handsome face.

“I got a promotion.” The words left his mouth like a bullet train. No pause. No emotion. No nothing.

“That’s amazing!” Your fatigue washed away as soon as you heard the good news. You jumped into his arms and hugged him as tightly as you could. “Congratulations!” Though, you were a little confused with the sudden promotion. Was it because he slept with his boss? You quietly thought to yourself.

“No, I got it before I even slept with her and besides she’s in a different department, she doesn’t have a say.” He sped through the explanation like he knew what you were thinking.

“Scoobs, that’s wonderful. I’m happy for you!” You smiled, lifting your arms to hug him, inching closer.

“It’s in New York.” 

You could hear a pin drop. The silence engulfed the two of you. You were hoping Beomgyu would come out in an ugly baggy tuxedo shouting “YOU JUST GOT PRANK’D SON!” like he had one time during your birthday when they switched out your cake for cardboard but minutes passed and no one but the crickets were talking. It was just the right time for you to fall back onto the lawn chair, maybe miss the lawn chair and hit your head so it’d crack open so you couldn’t see the love of your life walk out on you.

“For how long?”

“2 years.” Soobin mumbled.

Your arms untangle from Soobin’s, you looked at him confused before a smile returned to your face.You couldn’t let him know you were upset.

“Are you gonna accept the offer?” You asked, a smile still covering your progressive state of panic, trying your best to stay impartial towards your best friend.

“I don’t know. The salary’s amazing, a huge jump from my current pay. The company provides – accommodation, transportation, medical benefits and a whole ton of shit that I never had.”

“That’s amazing,” You said before pausing, the pause took longer than you’d initially expected, “But you don’t seem too happy.” 

“It’s just…” Soobin sighed, his legs giving up. He fell to his knees and cradled himself next to the wall. You found yourself moving from the lawn chair as you made your way towards the taller male. You placed a hand on his knee as you sat beside him and laid your head on his shoulder. “So so so fucking far.” His voice broke. His eyes forming tears but he turned away before you could see it fall.  “From everyone. From you.” 

You ignored the heart palpitations you were having. If you ignored it, maybe it’d go away. 

“Soobin…” You used his real name, hoping he’d know that you were serious. You turned his face toward you, looking at him in adoration. “I don’t want- we don’t want to be the reason you didn’t take this great fucking opportunity and it’s only 2 years. Soobin, you’ve worked so har-”

Soobin cuts you off, “It’s not the same. I want to be with you guys. We promised that we’d be here when Yeonjun finally finds his passion. God, I’m going to miss Beomgyu’s graduation. I can’t leave! We haven’t even gotten to see the sunrise together in Bukchon! We haven’t gone on the camping trip we’ve been planning since high school! What’s Kai going to do when he finds out that I’m leaving? He’s like a son to me. Dear God, what if Taehyun hunts me down and-” He rambled on and on.

“Soobin,” You cut him off. “stop thinking about us and start thinking about what YOU want to do. You’ve wanted to be a journalist for so long.” You took a deep breath. “Soobs, you graduated at the top of your class. You pulled an all-nighter every single day for three weeks before your final exam. You put up with shitty intern supervisors for this very opportunity! You’re finally achieving your dream!”

“You don’t get it.” Soobin sighed, a hint of frustration in his voice.

“What don’t I get?” You mirrored his annoyance.

Soobin had worked so hard, you were almost furious that he was fighting NOT to go. He would be stupid to reject an offer that could potentially elevate his career and here he was upset he couldn’t go camping with the 5 of you in a shitty forest in your old boring neighbourhood.

“It’s not my dream.” He said, his eyebrows furrowing. His hands moved to the sides of your arms, gripping onto them. You looked up, slightly puzzled at his firmness.

“Soobin, I saw your vision board. It was in big red letters, right next to ‘Meet Bebe Rexha’.” You mumbled.

The vision board was something Soobin had done to stay consistent with the goals he had set up for himself when he was 11. The board was made from his first laptop box, it was cut up and pasted on his wall. Torn up pieces of newspaper, magazines and notes with his goals pasted on the edges of the board with the words ‘SOOBIN’S DREAMS’ written across the middle.  It started when he was in middle school, he’d paste pictures of grades he manifested, vacation spots he wanted to visit. He’d done everything on the vision board. You couldn’t be the reason for him to stop finishing what he started.

“The vision board was made before I met you.” He replied. 

“What does that have to do with anything?” You said, yawning mid way. You lifted your head up to look over to him. His gaze dead set on you. The butterflies in your stomach were much more active that night, violently fighting their way out of your stomach. His hands had found its way to your thigh, as it grazed up and down, up and down, comforting you in this dreadful situation. His soft, slender fingers traced comforting patterns on your thigh, a gesture of reassurance amid uncertainty, your silent connection speaking volumes.

Soobin cleared his throat, “I…um…I guess what I’m trying to say is that this dream…” He paused and gestured between the two of you with his hands. “that you think I’m…uh, achieving? It’s not complete. Not complete at all.” His voice falters like he was about to say something stupid.

“What’s missing?” You gulped, nervous. The movement of his hands on your thighs stop as he moves them to your face. 

His eyes shifted to yours. “You.” 

“Oh.” You replied. 

“I like you.” Soobin confessed. “And I know you like me too.” 

“What? I neve-”

“Yeonjun can be a blabbermouth when he’s drunk.” 

“That fiend.” You muttered under your breath causing Soobin to chuckle.

“I like you. I like you so much.” He paused, more eager. “God, I think about you all the time, when I sleep, when I eat. You’re in my head all the time. I literally wake up and go, ‘I wonder what she’s doing today?’. The vision board isn’t my future. You are.”

You didn’t say anything. You didn’t really know what to say. 

“Just say the word and I won’t go.”

—------------------

2 years later

“I look stupid.” You said, looking at yourself in the mirror. A shimmery blue beaded dress tugged on your waist as you found yourself being tossed and turned by Yeonjun as if you were some kind of ragdoll. 

“You look wonderful, now hold still. I’m a second away from being annoyed at you.” Yeonjun said, pinching the side of your waist to keep you from fidgeting.

“Ouch!” You felt a pin poke your sides, you jumped at the feeling before Yeonjun smacked your arms.

“Don’t be such a baby.” Yeonjun ridiculed, before spinning you around to take a good look at you. “You look great.” 

“Do I really?” You asked, clear confusion on your face, you eyed yourself in the mirror. You looked like a helpless little girl stuck in a bunch of blue glittery fabric.

“Could you relax? You’re wearing a Yeonjun original. Of course, you look good.” Yeonjun grinned, pride evident on his face. You couldn’t help but beam at your friend. 

Yeonjun found his place designing dresses for a boutique for his aunt about a year ago and you were incredibly happy for him especially after the difficulties he had faced finding the right job for him.

“Gyu, what do you think?” You turned to face Beomgyu, who had little to no interest and twirled for him.

“Gyu…CHOI BEOMGYU!” Yeonjun yelled.

“WHAT?!” Beomgyu rolled his eyes, placing the magazine he was reading onto his lap, looking up at you and Yeonjun, “I was in the middle of reading an article! Hilary Duff’s secrets to conquering acne and online haters—front cover exclusive.”

You laughed and spun for him, “Gyu, how do I look?”

“The dress is good.” He said nonchalantly before turning back to his magazine.

“That’s all?” Yeonjun pestered.

“What am I supposed to fucking say?” Beomgyu groaned.

“Something descriptive? Or helpful!” Yeonjun urged.

“I know how to be helpful. It’s officially been 2 years since Soo-…” Beomgyu finally chimed in.

“Don’t bring him up.” Yeonjun cuts Beomgyu off. “We were having a nice time.”

“We’re seeing him next week so I don’t know why you’re being all… skittish about the situation.” Beomgyu retaliated.

Yeonjun’s hand found his way to yours, lending a hand of comfort after he had noticed your clear discomfort when Soobin was mentioned.

“I’m fine. It’ll be nice seeing him. Have you guys…um… spoken to him recently?” You asked, hoping someone would have at least some news about him.

“Not since the second month he left. ‘I’ll e-mail you guys everyday’ turned out to be a month and a half before he started posting cute pictures of himself on instagram in ugly turtlenecks. Who does he think he is? Steve Jobs? And for the love of God, who actually posts their girlfriend that much on a daily basis? I do not care for your ugly girlfriend.” Beomgyu spat bitterly. 

“Gyu.” You warned.

“Oh, sorry, I forgot we weren’t haters anymore so I’ll rephrase. I do care…” he looked at the two of you and shook his head. “for his bug-eyed, self-absorbed, irritating, conniving, little minx of a girlfriend. See? I can be descriptive.” 

You rolled your eyes, shoving his arm before chuckling. Despite his hatred for everything, you adored Beomgyu. He had a way of saying shit that just made you forget why you were upset in the first place. 

“Well, he sent me a heart eye emoji on a shirtless picture I posted on stories the other day. Though I think that might’ve been a mistake.” Yeonjun cleared his throat.

“Posting that picture was a mistake. A horrid shirtless picture at 8am? A new low even for you.” Beomgyu said before catching a flying pillow that was hurtling towards him. 

“I will end you.” Yeonjun threatened. 

“Sure, peepaw. Anyway,” Beomgyu sighed, focusing his attention back on you. “Have you guys talked?”

“No. We haven’t talked since the day he left.” 

—-----

“I’ll e-mail you guys everyday! Facetime, instagram, hell, I’d even use Facebook for you turds! I promise.” 

“For the record, Facebook is a great social media platform.” Kai said defensively.

“We get it. One of your videos got viral on that old people's platform.” Taehyun rolled his eyes.

The five of you trailed behind Soobin, with bags of gifts in your arms because Soobin couldn’t “leave you guys empty-handed”.  That just meant he gave you a bunch of rubbish he didn’t need for New York.   

Soobin huffed, his eyes welling with tears. “Fuck, I don’t wanna go.”

“You have to. You’ll be back in 2 years and we’ll be back at Mr Kim’s diner once again bickering about stupid shit like we always have. And don’t worry! We’ll come to visit the moment Yeonjun gets a job so he can pay for his air ticket.” Kai chuckled. 

“I HAVE a job!” Yeonjun retaliated.

“You went to one interview.”

“And the lady said she’d call!” 

“I think we should focus on the fact Soobin is leaving.” Taehyun muttered.

“No. Don’t. I’ll miss your stupid arguments and how stupid everything Beomgyu says is.”

“At least someone appreciates me.” Beomgyu beamed.

Your heart fastened as you felt the 6 of you inch closer to the departure hall. Every single memory of Soobin and you had replayed in your mind. The last-minute movie dates, the overnight calls, burning the midnight oil as you studied through your last year of college together. 

“Soobin.” You singled him out from the rest, pulling onto his baggy sweatshirt. You dragged him to the corner with your 4 remaining friends making kissy noises at the back. 

“Ooooo~ Soobin. I love you.” 

“Hm?” You and Soobin were away from the others, standing by a charging station opposite his departure gate.

He fidgeted with his passport, peeling the cover and putting it back on.

“I’ll wait for you,” you finally said.

“And I’ll be back. Two years,” Soobin promised, kissing your cheek, the warmth lingering.

“Two years,” you nodded.

Soobin turned away but hesitated, feeling glued to the spot. Suddenly, he spun back around, grabbing your face with both hands and pressing his lips to yours. 

When he finally pulled back, both of you were breathless. “I love you,” he whispered again, his forehead resting against yours.

“I love you too,” you replied, your voice shaky but certain.

There it was. The most pain you had ever felt. You’ve gotten hurt a lot of times in the past. When Yeonjun ran over your foot with his new hoverboard. When Beomgyu said you looked stupid wearing your favourite beret. When your middle school crush threw a ball straight to your face. When you fell off the stairs after tripping over your shoelaces. Your parents saying you’d never live up to your cousin. A whole ton of shit.

But this? This was a thousand times worse than everything combined.

—

“Good lord, I did not realise Haechan had this many friends.” Taehyun gulped as the five of you entered the wedding hall. Decorated in the ugliest laced curtains you had ever seen, you kept the look of disgust in your head. Though who were you to complain, you couldn’t even get over someone you liked 2 years ago.

“It’s a miracle he managed to settle down.” Beomgyu whispered, referring to how Haechan has had quite the run when he was still single, living in an apartment with like 5 other frat guys naming themselves ‘dreamies’ or something like that. 

“Table 34? That’s all the way at the back!” Kai breathed, annoyed. “And to think I was his cheat sheet in high school.”

“You gave him a C+ at best.” Taehyun commented.

“A C+ that I studied for!”

“Let it go, Kai. At least we’re at the same table.” You consoled, staring at yourtable card.

“Thirty-fi-...Hold up. What the fuck. I’m at table 35!” Beomgyu spat.

“It’s probably because of that one time you stole his sandwich.” Yeonjun reminded us.

“It was a tuna sandwich. Who gives a shit? Hey, someone switch with me. I see Lucas at table 35 and I am not ready to sit with his big ass head blocking my view.” He growled.

“No.” The four of you chimed.

Beomgyu groaned. Ignoring his sulky gaze towards you, you looked over to table 34. Your eyes scanned the seats for your name. 

Ah, there it was. A white chair draped in fancy lace and a ton of shit Haechan probably paid too much for. A chair that was…

Right next to Choi Soobin.

No…no…no. This couldn’t be happening to you. 

“Hey, on second thought, Gyu. I’ll gladly change my seats with you.” 

“What’s with the sudd-” Beomgyu glanced at your seat. “Yeah, I’ll take a chance with big head. Good luck.” 

“Gyu!” You begged.

“Big hea- Lucas!” He called out before running over to the big goof at table 35. 

“Guys, I swear to God, don’t leave me alone with him.” Your eyes filled with desperation. 

“We won’t. Unlike Beomgyu, we actually love and cherish y- Oh my god, Taehyun, they have crepes here. I REPEAT! THEY HAVE CREPES!” Kai squeaked, pulling Taehyun towards the food.

“And then there were two.” Yeonjun sighed, placing a hand on your back. 

“Jun…” You cried.

“I’m right here. I won’t go anywhere.” Yeonjun reassured you before leading you to your table.

You could feel your heart bursting out of your chest. In no way shape or form were you ready to see him waltz in with his plus one that so happened to be the big boss he slept with 2 years ago. Coincidence? You doubt it. Everyday you thought of the possibility of what could’ve been and it has sucked you back to misery every. Single. Time.  

You sat next to Yeonjun and fiddled with the hem of your skirt. Your legs were shaking from nerves. Your eyes shifted across the room, hoping he wasn’t going to show up. But lo and behold, the monster of your nightmare strutting in with his beautiful girlfriend. 

“Good God.” Kai whispered as he walked back to the table with crepes in his hand. “Here he comes.” 

“Hm, Gyu was right. She does have bug eyes.” Taehyun added.

“Dude!” Yeonjun exclaimed, hitting Taehyun’s arms. “They’re coming! Act normal. Like we weren’t just talking about them!” 

The four of you looked away trying to avoid eye contact with your former friend. You felt the chair beside you being filled when Kai burst out laughing.

“God! Yeonjun, HAHA, yes. Yep. I remember that incident. A while ago. It was crazy. Crazy.” Kai yelled aloud.

“Play it cool.” Taehyun elbowed Kai who was in a reasonable state of panic.

Soobin cleared his throat, twiddling his thumbs.

“Hey guys, it’s been a long time.” He begun. 

The four of you glanced over to him, simultaneously nodding before looking back at each other.

“Yeah. 2 years?” Yeonjun replied, avoiding eye contact with the taller fellow. 

“Um, yeah,” Soobin said. “This is my girlfriend.” 

This time you spoke but not before clearing your throat, “Uh, yes. Hello.” You nodded in her direction before turning your attention back to Yeonjun. 

You tugged onto Yeonjun’s shirt, mouthing, ‘Save me’. You knew if you had to look at them any longer you would start feeling pity for yourself and soon enough you’d start crying at a wedding you didn’t even give a shit about. 

“It’s been a long time, Soobin. You’ve missed a lot.” Yeonjun spoke, you could feel Soobin tense up beside you. Probably from Yeonjun’s tone. 

“Oh yeah?” You heard Soobin ask. Your eyes were still on Yeonjun. 

“Well for starters, Kai finally found a corporate job.” Taehyun started.

“Yep. I’m a slave to capitalism now. Taehyun’s assistant at your service.” Kai chuckled awkwardly, rubbing the back of his neck. He sipped his large glass of wine, looked away then twiddled with his thumbs. It was clear that the lovely Huening Kai hated these types of situations. 

“Yeonjun too! He’s a fashion designer.” You managed to fumble out trying your darndest to be casual when your eyes moved over to observe Soobin for a fleeting moment before deciding that maybe it was too early to even look at him. One look and your friends understood your desperation to leave. Calmly trying to take over the conversation, Yeonjun opened his mouth to speak when Soobin beat him to it.

“What about you?”

“Why do you care?” You replied instantly before regretting how rude you probably sounded. “I mean, I’m a kindergarten teacher.”

“Well, you were always good with kids. It fits you.” Soobin said with so much sincerity in his voice you almost regret replying him with that much hostility. Almost.

“Mhm.” You nodded, still looking away. 

“Uh, how about you?” Yeonjun asked, gesturing to Soobin.

God, how much you would PAY to have Beomgyu swoop into save you.

2 years ago, you’d never have thought that any of you would be in this awkward situation.. Hell, Soobin used to be your escape and now he was just someone you feared seeing. As time passed, it seemed that your friendship was almost nothing but faint memories. 

“Well, uh…” Soobin began.

“We’re great.” His girlfriend chimed in. “Hi, I know you’ve probably seen me in his instagram stories.To answer your question, a few things are in store for both of us. Mr Choi here has a soon-to-be promotion coming up and Mrs Choi here is really proud.” She announced, shoving her finger in front of the four of you. 

Your heart dropped. Despite being left for two years, maybe somewhere in your heart, you had still hoped he’d see what he was missing and come crawling back to you. Then maybe your happy ending could finally start. But that goal seemed a little too far fetched now.

The diamond rock stared at you and then eventually mocked you for being ugly and single.

Yeonjun’s eyes widened before sputtering out a bunch of words – congrats or something like that, you honestly couldn’t comprehend the conversation any further. Then you felt yourself being pulled back into this dreadful event when Yeonjun nudged you.

“I said…what about you? Are you seeing anyone?” She sneered, her attention glued on you, lifting an eyebrow, almost expectant to hear the answer she wanted. 

After what seemed like hours, you mustered the courage to glance at Soobin, who was already watching you curiously. Once best friends, the word "love" had been thrown around casually. Yet, you didn’t want him prying into your private life, especially with his impending marriage.

“I…uh…” You stammered, unable to comprehend the situation or even form a proper sentence.

“Actually,” Yeonjun spoke. “Beomgyu and her have been dating for awhile now.” 

“What?!” You exclaimed, your eyes wide at the sudden accusation. 

You were upset about two things: first, this dreadful lie Yeonjun just spouted and second, that you weren’t able to catch Soobin’s reaction. Was he hurt? Was he angry? Was he feeling how you were feeling? Slightly betrayed, slightly hurt and just really hungry…God, who were you kidding? You couldn’t even stomach food with Soobin’s shoulder knocking onto yours every few seconds.

Upset by the lie and missing Soobin's reaction, you noticed Yeonjun’s unnerving nonchalance.

“Oh come on. Soobin’s an old friend. We can trust him,” Yeonjun lied smoothly, munching on crackers.

Kai and Taehyun, equally confused, looked at you in disbelief. Kai, his lips trembling, added, “Yeah, they’re really cute together. It was a shocker.”

Taehyun gulped, “You can’t imagine how surprised we were.”

“The most adorable couple I know! You should really hear the story of how Beomgyu asked her out. It was so cute!” Yeonjun added enthusiastically.

“Speaking of boyfriends, here he comes now!” Taehyun shouted, pointing at Beomgyu, who was strutting over with a goofy grin.

“You guys will not believe what Lucas said to me!” Beomgyu yelled over the loud music.

“Not the time,” Kai mumbled, gesturing to Soobin with his eyes.

Beomgyu’s grin faded as he noticed the tension in the group and quickly caught on to the situation.

“What?” Beomgyu said, confused before realising Soobin was right there. “Oh. It’s you. Hi bro. It’s been a long time, hasn’t it? You look great for someone who left his best friends hanging for 2 years but great, nonetheless.”

You snorted, feeling a bit more confident with Beomgyu’s tactless honesty. With him around, you strangely always felt 2 times more powerful – like you had no fear because if anyone were to tell you off Beomgyu would be glad to do it back to them. Probably even worse than they had done to you.

Beomgyu pulled out his phone, rereading Yeonjun's text, then gasped aloud.

“Babe, I thought you said you weren’t ready to tell anyone!” Beomgyu exclaimed, resting his arms on your shoulders as he knelt beside your chair.

If you weren’t in on this, you’d believe you were in a relationship with Beomgyu. Their acting was top-notch.

“I didn’t think Yeonjun would announce it,” you lied.

“God, you know what? I am kind of glad that it’s out. I can finally tell the world that you’re mine.” Beomgyu grinned before planting a kiss on your cheek. “Soobin, I believe I have yet to tell you about how we first got together.”

“Uh…” Soobin stammered, almost wanting to decline.

“Thank you for asking me. Well…it was a few months after you left. She had been crying over your move for like two months, it was like really terrible. Constant tears, just blueh-” Beomgyu started, earning a glare from you.

“Babe…it’s part of the story. Stop looking at me like that. Did you know glaring can affect your aging? We can’t have you looking 60 when we haven’t had our first child.”

“Sorry.” You apologised even though you didn’t know why. He was, technically, embarrassing you. Your cheeks pinked when you felt Soobin look over to you.

“Anyway I was like shit, why does it hurt me so much to see her hurting? So I talked to Yeonjun –”

“That’s me.” Yeonjun raised his hands, inserting himself into a situation he started.

“This isn’t about you…” Beomgyu paused, grabbing Yeonjun’s hand and shoving it away. “I consulted Yeonjun and was like dude why the fuck am I so sad when she’s sad?”

“Yeah and I was like maybe you lik-” Yeonjun interrupted.

“Yeonjun, please!”  Beomgyu grunted. "Anyway, he was like, 'Maybe you like her?' And I sat there for weeks thinking about it before I realized I did like her. Her hair smells like flowers, and she giggles so cutely at cat pictures. She’s always there for me. Every single time I feel dread, she’s there. She…” Beomgyu pauses, glancing at you with a gentle smile.

“Look at her. She’s…well, she’s undeniably beautiful. When I look at her, my troubles just melt away. Nothing in the world matters except for me and her.” Beomgyu's voice softened with every word, each one filled with sincerity.

You looked over to Beomgyu, feeling a warm blush spread across your cheeks, even though you knew he was pretending.

The two of you might have been staring at each other for a minute too long. Yeonjun cleared his throat.

“Uh. Right. Anyway, despite this, I didn’t really wanna ruin the friendship but I thought I’d rather try than leave and feel empty. Of course, she didn’t feel the same way since she was too busy being hung up on someone who wasn’t. even. there.”

You felt Soobin shift in his seat. He cleared his throat

“Well, I changed my mind eventually, didn’t I?” You added. A sudden surge of confidence pulsed through your veins. You wanted to lie. You wanted to believe that you were okay when Soobin left. You wanted Soobin to know that you didn’t need him. In fact, you didn’t want him. And you didn’t spend like 2-3 months moping in your house, crying over the fact he moved on and you didn’t.

“She didn’t like me back at first. So I went to Kai and Taehyun for some more advice and Kai was unsupportive at first, telling me how he didn’t want to lose another friend but you know Taehyun and Yeonjun convinced him and here we are.”

“Then what happened?” You asked, intrigued by Beomgyu’s story.

“Weren’t you there when it happened?” Soobin’s girlfriend piped in.

“Yeah. But I like it when my baby tells the story.” You glared back at her before wrapping your arms around Beomgyu’s waist.

“Well…I, uh, I told her on her birthday. I gave her a necklace with a picture of us we took on the day I took her out to cheer her up. We went to a photobooth and she kissed my cheek for the first time so I printed the photo and placed it in the necklace and told her I liked her and here we are.”

You looked down at your necklace. Well, Beomgyu wasn’t lying about one thing. 

—-

“Okay, my turn!” Beomgyu exclaimed, handing you a personalised pink box. 

“What is it?” You asked, curiosity evident. You shook the box, a single metal-like item knocking on the walls of the boxes. 

“You have hands. You can open the box.” Beomgyu joked.

Your fingers graced the velvet box, “God, the box is so pretty.”

“I know how much of a sucker you are for ornate boxes.”

You grinned at your best friend. He did know you. Maybe a little too much. 

Beomgyu searched your eyes for any sign of excitement and when he got a squeak from you, he knew you were. His nerves finally settled down when you finally opened the box revealing a chain necklace with a single heart hanging off. 

“Gyu!” You cried, opening the locket. “It’s so pretty and –the picture! This is so cute!” 

You squealed and jumped into his arms, wrapping yours around his much larger exterior. “Thank you!”

His hand found their way to your back, his fingers played with the wrinkles of your shirt, “I’m glad you liked it. I have one just like it so if we ever get lost and separated, I’ll know how to find you.” Beomgyu grinned. 

“Why would we ever get separated?” You asked, looking at him through your eyelashes.

“There could be zombies.”

“Zombie, no zombie, we’re literally together 24/7. Let’s face it, I’d probably get bitten in the first 2 hours and you’d probably let me infect you because you got lazy or something.”

“You’re right. We wouldn’t make it. You know who would?” 

“Taehyun.” You both sang.

—---

“You think he bought it?” you asked with a smirk as you swung open your apartment door. Chucking your shoes into the cabinet next to the entrance, you flopped down onto your sofa. Beomgyu followed suit, collapsing into the bean bag chair.

“I think Kai showing Soobin that video of us kissing at the New Year's party really sealed the deal,” Beomgyu replied with a grin.

“It’s a good thing the sound wasn’t on, or else he’d hear a loud ‘I TOLD YOU THEY’D DO IT FOR TWENTY’,” you mimicked Yeonjun's bet with Taehyun, recalling the hilarious wager over your New Year's kiss. In your defense, it was all in good fun, and the $20 came in handy during your ramen days.

“Look at us now! Gainfully employed adults who don’t have to resort to crazy dares for lunch money,” Beomgyu chuckled.

“I wouldn’t consider kissing you a crazy dare,” you quipped after a pause.

“You don’t think kissing your best friend is crazy?” Beomgyu raised an eyebrow.

“I don’t think kissing you is crazy,” you said casually.

“Oh,” Beomgyu cleared his throat. “Why not?”

“I don’t know. I just know I wouldn’t kiss Tae, Kai, or Jun.”

“Hm?”

“Seems gross. Lightly verging on incestuous,” you laughed, switching on the TV to distract yourself. The conversation shifted as a dating show you both enjoyed came on, pulling you into its drama-filled world.

After a while, Beomgyu broke the silence. “I feel the same way.”

“Huh?” you turned to him in surprise.

“I wouldn’t kiss Tae, Kai, or Jun either. Or anyone else, for that matter. Seems gross.”

You couldn’t help but smile at his words, your heart warming at the shared sentiment.

The corners of your lip turned upward. 

—---

Beomgyu’s eyes remained fixated on you as you twirled around in front of the mirror, and he couldn’t help but feel like he was witnessing something magical. His heart skipped a beat as he admired how the dress accentuated every graceful movement you made.

“Gyu…”

“CHOI BEOMGYU!”

“What?!” Beomgyu snapped, trying to appear engrossed in the magazine in his hands. “I was in the middle of reading an article! Hilary Duff’s secrets to conquering acne and online haters—front cover exclusive.” He held up the magazine proudly, hoping his distraction tactic worked.

You giggled, “Gyu, how do I look?”

“The dress is... um, good,” Beomgyu stuttered, his cheeks turning pink as he peeked over the magazine. ‘Good?’ He mentally scolded himself. ‘Could you be any more awkward?’ He wanted to say you looked breathtaking, enchanting, but the words seemed to escape him in that moment.

“That’s all?” Yeonjun teased from behind his own magazine, grinning mischievously at Beomgyu.

“Can I live?” Beomgyu shot back, feeling Yeonjun’s teasing intensify his embarrassment.

In his head, Beomgyu cursed Yeonjun’s nosiness. Maybe keeping his feelings for you a secret would have been a better idea.

—--------

“What the fuck was that?” Beomgyu exploded as he stormed into his apartment, Yeonjun trailing behind with a thousand apologies.

“I said I was sorry! I panicked!” Yeonjun exclaimed, his voice filled with regret.

“Undo what you just did,” Beomgyu demanded, pacing back and forth in the living room.

“I can’t! You saw how hurtful Soobin's new girlfriend was! I didn’t want our best friend to feel even worse seeing the love of her life get married while she’s here, still hung up on him,” Yeonjun reasoned, trying to justify his impulsive actions.

“So you drag me into it?” Beomgyu questioned sharply, clearly displeased.

“You were dragged into it when you told me you liked her! Face it, Gyu, everything you said today about the two of you was true, except that you didn’t actually tell her you like her.”

“And for good reason!” Beomgyu shot back. “You saw how worked up she was over Soobin! She even agreed to fake date me just to get back at him!”

“Maybe it’s a good thing!” Yeonjun attempted to console him.

“Yeah, totally! I agree. Being her fake boyfriend is so much better than being her real one! Thank you, Yeonjun! You really are Cupid! Maybe I should invite you to our fake wedding! We could have fake kids too!” Beomgyu yelled, his sarcasm dripping with frustration.

“Okay, maybe I haven’t thought it all the way through, but according to this ridiculous post by Soobin’s girlfriend, they’re going to be here all month. So why don’t you two start posting cute couple shit, first convince Soobin that you got the girl, and then actually get the girl?” Yeonjun suggested with a mischievous grin.

“What kind of sick, twisted, and insane plan is that?” Beomgyu felt his last shred of sanity being pushed out the window by Yeonjun's outrageous suggestion.

“A really, really bad one,” Yeonjun admitted sheepishly, realizing the mess he had inadvertently created.

—-----------

"So we’re doing this?" Beomgyu gulped nervously.

"I guess. I mean, how hard is it to act like we’re in love? You and Yeonjun do it all the time," you teased lightly.

"I’m gonna need you to take whatever you said back," Beomgyu replied with a mock shudder.

"Should our first date be at Lotte World then? I heard senior citizens get half off. We can bring Yeonjun," you joked, chuckling at the thought.

Your humour eased some of Beomgyu's tension, though it also stirred something deeper within him. It wasn’t a surprise to anyone that you had grown closer to Beomgyu after Soobin's departure. You practically lived at his place, even having your own drawer there now. While Beomgyu wasn't trying to replace Soobin, he had become Your Beomgyu in a way that was uniquely yours.

“MAY DAY!” Kai’s voice echoed through the hallways as he barged into Beomgyu’s room, phone in hand. “Look!” He shoved the phone screen in front of Beomgyu's face.

Soobin: Great seeing you guys the other day! We should hang out again. Maybe just the 6 of us like old times.

“Did you reply?” Beomgyu asked, trying to mask his concern.

“I…”

“Kai…”

“LOOK! I panicked and said okay! DON’T KILL ME!” Kai screamed.

You and Beomgyu exchanged a glance, silently agreeing to a plan that would convince Soobin you were indeed in a real relationship.

“We’ll do it,” you both said in unison.

“What?” Kai looked bewildered.

“I want to do it. It’s a chance to show him that I’ve moved on,” you explained firmly.

“You’ve moved on like this far,” Kai teased, stretching his arm toward Beomgyu.

“What’s wrong with dating me?” Beomgyu joked back, though inwardly, he couldn’t help but wonder if you’d ever date him if it was a different circumstance.

—--

“Hold my right hand.” Beomgyu insisted.

The two of you were walking to the diner that the 6 of you were supposed to meet up at. It was strange since the last time you were there, you and Huening were manning the counter, Beomgyu had shaggy black hair that made him look like delinquent…(well a cute delinquent but you weren’t going to let Beomgyu know that, it was gonna go to his head), Yeonjun was unemployed, Taehyun minding his own business as usual and well when Soobin…was the love of your life.

“What? Why?” You asked, raising an eyebrow.

“My right hand says I wuv you baby while my left hand says lets game bro!” He lifted his left arm, flexing his muscles to you. 

“Beomgyu, I swear to God, if you don’t stop doing that I’ll fake break up with you right now.”

“Okay, sorry. Geez.” Beomgyu rested his arms across your waist, giving your sides a gentle squeeze. “Nervous?”

“Well…I’m fake dating my best friend to get back at my ex-crush who promised he’d wait for me and then got together with the woman he said he didn’t have any feelings for and is now engaged to her. Yeah. Kinda.” You rambled, sweat dripping down your forehead.

“Look, it’s just the 6 of us today. No weird looks from the loony with the bug eyes.” Beomgyu tried reassuring you.

“It wasn’t her I was worried about. It’s Soobin.”

“Oh.” 

“It’s stupid.” You sighed, feeling your body tense as you inched closer to the familiar neighbourhood.

“Try me.”

“It’s just…when I look at him, it’s like I’m 18 again. The feelings come rushing back when I don’t want it to. I was an idiot then.”

“You’re not an idiot.” Beomgyu pursed his lips before continuing. “You’re you. You love hard and you mourned what could’ve been. You’re a person with feelings and I- we love you for that.” 

Blood rushed to your cheeks. The feeling of shyness overwhelmed you. 

Clearing your throat, you pointed up to the diner, “There it is.”

You felt your throat closing up. Were you really about to fake date your best friend who you supposedly had no feelings for just to get back at someone who you liked 2 years ago? Were you about to stoop so low just to feel like you’ve gotten back at him? What were you aiming to achieve? 

“There’s the lovebirds!” Kai’s voice echoed throughout the little cafe. 

The place still looked the same. The crooked paintings on the wall, the jagged tear on the booth sofa that Kai made when he dropped a pair of scissors and the rusty wall decor that your manager insisted on keeping though you said the customers complained about its stench. Oddly enough, the stench was strangely comforting to you. It reminded you of the old times. 

Your eyes found its way to Soobin, who was wearing a tight black shirt that clung onto his body for its dear life, khaki pants that accentuated his calves and a pair of black converse. His jet black hair slicked back with gel as he unintentionally flexed his arm, gripping onto the large glass of milkshake with his left hand. God, he was gorgeous. Fuck. You thought.

As you took a seat between Taehyun and Beomgyu, you felt his piercing gaze burn holes through your head. 

“Well, never thought I’d see the six of us back here.” Beomgyu spoke after the painful and excruciating minute of silence.

“Can’t believe Mr. Kim still keeps that hideous picture of us up there.” Kai pointed to the featured wall.

Mr. Kim, your old manager, had a wall dedicated to employees of the month. Kai had been employee of the month for 3 months straight while you for 2. On a technicality, you were the only two people who worked for him for these 5 months. 

“Aw come on, at least you look cute in yours. I look like a sloth. Look at my eyebags.” You laughed. 

“I think you look pretty.” 

You looked up, locking eyes with Soobin who had just called you words you never thought you’d ever hear come out from his pretty little mouth. 

“Thank you?” You squeezed Beomgyu’s hand. 

“Thank you on behalf of my girlfriend. I guess I’ve finally found one thing we both can agree on.”

“Your eyebags were horrendous.” Taehyun brought up, shaking his head.

“They were.” You groaned, “You guys didn’t think to get me collagen masks for my birthday?”

“We got you something better.” Beomgyu said. “Remember?”

“You guys got me a custom pillow with Chris Evans on the front.” You sighed.

“THAT WASN’T MY IDEA!” Yeonjun yelled, “It was Soobin’s!” 

“Only because she said she wanted to marry him!” Soobin defended himself. “She was in love with him all throughout college!” 

“Well, it could still happen!” You fought.

“Doesn’t he already have a girlfriend?” Kai chuckled. “Oh wait a minute. Don’t YOU already have one?”

“I’m pretty sure Gyu would be okay with me leaving him for Chris Evans.” You giggled.

“Don’t worry. We have a pact. She can bump Chris Evans if I can bump Scarlett Johansson.” 

“They’re on our list.” You joked along.

It was strange. You felt like you were 18 again. Laughing away like nothing could hurt you. Like Soobin hadn’t left.

“So…um…Soobin, when’s the big wedding?” Yeonjun asked.

This got you interested. When was the big wedding? How did they even find time to fall in love between the 2 months of Soobin moving in? What happened to “she’s not even in this department” or “she didn’t have anything to do with my promotion?” You were having thoughts. Bitter thoughts.

“Next month.” Soobin answered.

The atmosphere died. Taehyun who was sitting beside you stiffened.

“We weren’t invited?” Taehyun spoke. He had always been the more direct one out of all of you. Though Beomgyu was talking shit most of the time, you still knew he had moments when he couldn’t naturally articulate his anger..

“Guys…”

A pregnant pause engulfed the entirety of the room. Taehyun sighed before finally bursting.

“No, seriously. First you leave us, and after 2 months you just stopped contacting us altogether. You got with someone you promised was a one night stand. You left our best friend waiting on your stupid fuckboy ass and didn’t update us about anything, came back 2 years later saying you’re getting married to said one night stand and didn’t invite us to your wedding? God…we were so off when we voted Yeonjun as the first person to leave the friend group.” Taehyun rambled.

“Hey! What the fuck. When did this voting take place?” Yeonjun gasped.

“On Gyu’s birthday but…holy shit, why’d you even wanna come hang with us?” Kai finally mustered the courage to talk.

“I missed you guys. I missed us. I’m sorry, I know I fucked up-”

“Fucked up doesn’t cut it. We’re clearly not as important as we thought we were.” Taehyun’s voice grew an inch louder. Accumulating stares from all around the diner, you cleared your throat and held Taehyun’s hand, “It’s okay.” 

“No. It’s not.” Soobin spoke, his voice filled with remorse. “Please…”

“Honest to God, I don’t even know why you’re holding your wedding back in Korea. Was New York too expensive for your pip pip cheerio girlfriend?” Yeonjun spoke.

“No. I-”

“Was New York out of people to backstab so you came back to Korea to do it to us twice?” Beomgyu scoffed.

The group erupted in laughter – with the exception of Soobin. Just like he was in the past, he didn’t like being the end of people’s jokes. 

“No. It’s because I’m moving back to Korea.” 

—--

You felt slightly defeated. All that talk, and you couldn’t even stay long enough for the food to arrive. You couldn’t, not with Soobin telling you that he was moving back permanently. With his fiancée. His future wife. God, you couldn’t even stomach that thought.

“Are you okay?” Beomgyu asked.

“Yeah, I’m fine.”

“You don’t sound fine.”

“I don’t know how you want me to react, Gyu.”

Beomgyu sighed, pulling you closer to his chest. “You’re silly.”

“What?”

“For being so faithful to someone who has clearly forgotten about you.”

“Gyu, if you’re not done being an asshole th—”

“It’s been two years. He’s moved on. You should too. You deserve so much more than just waiting around crying over some mediocre guy.”

“Am I not good enough? Am I not worth the wait?” You finally broke. “The night he told me he’d be moving to New York… he told me I was worth it. I was worth the two years.”

You sighed, laying your head onto Beomgyu’s shoulder. You were mentally exhausted. Years of feeling like you weren’t chosen piled up, making you feel like you were a shitty person in every way.

You continued, “Just months later, I see on Instagram that he’s frolicking at tourist sites with the same girl he told me not to worry about. How am I supposed to feel? I know it’s been two years, and I know we weren’t even dating, but when I look at him, it feels like just yesterday he was telling me how pretty I looked wearing my stupid purple dress.” You took a pause, gasping for air after rambling to Beomgyu and crying while at it.

“God,” Beomgyu mumbled, rolling his eyes.

“What? You must think I’m pretty stupid.”

“What? Yeah. I do,” Beomgyu said.

“What the fuck. You’re supposed to be comforting me!”

“I can’t do this anymore,” Beomgyu sighed. “You’re better than this. You can’t be moping around forever. Sure, he was your first love, but it doesn’t mean he was your only love. You’re incredibly beautiful and have the purest heart, despite being a little devil at times. If Soobin doesn’t see what he’s missing out on, then maybe he wasn’t that great in the first place. Move on. You can do much better than being sad over a man.”

“I’m sorry,” you muttered, reeling the emotions back in.

What Beomgyu had said essentially pulled you back to reality. You corrected your posture and cleared your throat. “I’m sorry,” you repeated.

“You don’t have to be. I’m just say—”

“I know, and I needed that.” Leaning in closer to your best friend, you kissed both sides of his cheeks, feeling the warmth of his face between your lips and his skin. “I love you.”

“Mhm,” he mumbled, looking away from you.

“Hey, are you blushing?” you sang. You teasingly pulled his arm. “Come on. Let me see your face.”

“I’m not! You’re just so ugly. I had to turn away.”

“Oh, come on,” you rolled your eyes. “You know the thing you said about Soobin being my first love?”

“Yeah?”

“Well, he wasn’t,” you chuckled.

“Oh. Was it Yeonjun then?”

You shook your head. “No. He was never my type.”

“Don’t tell me,” he gasped. “Our baby Huening?”

“Gyu, be serious.”

Beomgyu gasped. “God, you know I never pegged you as a Taehyun kind of guy. Probably because he’s really smart, and you’re hanging by the thinnest thread.”

“First of all,” you flicked his forehead. “Secondly, why are you so sure it’s someone in our friend group?”

Beomgyu chuckled. “You don’t have any more guy friends besides us. Unless… this is your coming out story, which by the way, I’m totally supportive of.”

“It’s not,” you laughed. “Anyway, as I was saying…”

You kept mum. You weren’t sure if the revelation of what you were about to say would scare him off.

“Nevermind,” you cowered.

“What? Man, I hate it when you do this! You get me all interested only to say nevermind.”

“It’s not even that important!”

“Everything you say is important,” Beomgyu prodded.

“You’re just saying that because you wanna know!”

“Okay then tell me!”

“It’s just… you know,” you stuttered. “It was you.”

“Huh?”

“My first… love?” you cringed as you said it. You hadn’t expected to tell Beomgyu that, not after you’d just cried over his ex-best friend.

—----------------------

You first met Soobin’s friends when you were at his place. It was only about the 4th time you’ve ever been to Soobin’s. He had invited you under the guise of watching a movie he’d been too scared to watch alone. You weren’t exactly expecting company but here Beomgyu and Huening Kai were – at Soobin’s doorstep with jumbo sized packets of cheetos and three large sodas.

“Shit. We didn’t know you were gonna have company.” Beomgyu grinned at Soobin whose cheeks turned bright red.

“I literally told you guys in the group chat yesterday,” Soobin rolled his eyes as he grabbed the bag of chips out of Beomgyu’s arms. 

“Well, hello there.” Kai donned his infamous sheepish smile, extending a hand,  “I’m Huening Kai. You can call me Huening or Kai but people usually call me handsome kid.” 

“I’ll be sure to call you the latter then.” You giggled, accepting his hand shake.

Kai moved, walking toward the sofa and your eyes landed onto the person behind Kai. 

“Hi.” You breathed. He was quite literally the most beautiful person you’ve ever laid your eyes upon. Shaggy long hair, long lashes, eyes that sparkled brighter than the sun, his legs beating the distance from Earth to Mars. You were in love. 

“Hi, I’m Beomgyu!” He beamed. Even his smile was pretty. 

You managed to stutter your name out like the idiot you were.

Your personality had become a complete 0. It tended to do that when you were with someone you found extremely attractive. 

Soobin pulled you aside, “Why are you all fidgety and awkward?”

“I’m just…nervous.” 

“What? You were all happy and excited to see Kai but when Beo- oh my God. You think he’s cute, don’t you?”

“Shut up! He’s gonna think I’m weird!” You hit Soobin’s shoulders. “Please don’t make it awkward.”

“I won’t. Besides, I think you guys would be great together.” 

—-------

Along the way, Beomgyu had a couple of girls he had a crush on, all of them distinctly different from how you were. So different. You just figured you weren’t his type and gradually forgot about how you felt about him. However, the feeling came back every now and then he had done something sweet. But somehow, you managed to convince yourself that Beomgyu was just your platonic soulmate.

—----

“Do you think he likes me back?” You asked Soobin, who had his airpods in. 

“What? Did you say something?”

“Nothing.” You shook  your head, embarrassed that you’d even ask a question like that.

“Maybe.” Soobin answered.

“I thought you didn’t hear what I said.” You scoffed.

"I like it when you bring embarrassing shit up. Sue me," Soobin laughed. "Seriously, if you're that worried, just tell him you like him. If he doesn't feel the same, it's not a big deal. Gyu isn't the type to make things awkward with someone he doesn't want to lose."

“What if I make things awkward?”

“Oh 100% gonna happen if it goes south.” Soobin laughed.

“Scoobs…” You whined.

"But it won’t. Because you’re amazing. He’d be an idiot not to like you. What’s there not to like?" Soobin smiled. You didn’t really notice, but the smile faded as soon as you stood up to walk to the kitchen.

“You know what, maybe I will tell him I like him. Thanks, Soobin.” You grinned.

—

You hate to admit it but the whole fake dating thing had you thinking about what could’ve been and had inevitably forced you to revisit the feelings you once had for him. 

You and Beomgyu walked into the bar that Kai had been raving about for weeks. 

Scanning the rooftop for your friends, your eyes finally landed onto Taehyun who had been aggressively waving to the both of you. 

“Why the fuck are you guys holding hands? Soobin isn’t even here yet.” Kai smirked. “Unless…”

“Oh shut up.”  You deadpanned which made Kai’s grin wider. 

“We were just practising.” Beomgyu said. 

—

“Beomgyu, I like you.” You said, staring at yourself in the mirror. The goofy look plastered on your face didn’t help ease any of your anxiety.

“That’s it?” Soobin sighed, “Where’s the heart?”

“Scoobs, I can barely talk to him or look him in the eye. How romantic do you think this confession should be?”

“Look…I’ve already told the boys. We’re all gonna back out from movie night last minute and the two of you are gonna be alone. We’ve practically set up the perfect date for the two of you!” Soobin yelled.

“I hardly think seeing a movie about apes is romantic.”

“Well, Kai picked the movie before we even planned the date so…”

“This is ridiculous.” 

Soobin and the rest of the boys were stationed a few feet away from you. All in dark disguises, shielding themselves from Beomgyu who could potentially be anywhere.

“This is ridiculous.” You whispered through your airpods.

“You look great.” Taehyun gave you a thumbs up from 5 feet away.

“He’s gonna know something’s up!”

“Why? Just because you’re wearing a cute purple dress and you’re finally not in sweats and don’t look like a homeless person?” Yeonjun wondered aloud.

“What I need is encouragement.” You sneered.

“You look beautiful.” Soobin mumbled. “Really.”

You looked up and saw Soobin offering you a tiny smile. You grinned as your anxiety lowered. 

“FUCK, HE’S HERE!” Kai panicked into the mic, jumping behind a large poster.

“There you are! I’ve called you like 5 times but it keeps hanging up on me. Are you on another call?” Beomgyu asked.

“Uh…” You shook your head. “No! I guess something’s wrong with my phone.” You chuckled awkwardly.

“Well, get this, the boys ditched movie night.” Beomgyu rolled his eyes.

“We can go home if you want.” You blurted.

“What? No! We can still have fun.  We don’t need those idiots.” 

“So you still wanna catch this movie?” 

“God, no.” Beomgyu shook his head. “I’m slightly thankful Kai isn’t here because then I wouldn’t have to watch that shit.” 

“Tell him you like him.” You heard Kai’s voice echo through your AirPods.

“No,” you said aloud.

“What?”

“Oh! I said, 'Oh!'” You laughed awkwardly.

“Just tell him already. I’m getting bored,” Kai repeated.

“Beomgyu. I need to tell you something.”

“Sure. What is it?”

“Gyu. I li-”

“GYUBEAR!” A girl screamed, prancing in to hug Beomgyu.

You froze, the words caught in your throat as you watched Beomgyu wrap his arms around the new girl, smiling brightly at her. With a forced smile, you turned away, hiding the disappointment that gripped your chest.

"Who... who is this?" you asked, feeling a knot of confusion tightening in your chest.

"This is Rina. She's my new girlfriend," Beomgyu grinned, his smile widening as he introduced her.

She looked...wildly different from how you did. Just like the rest of the girls Beomgyu had previously dated. Nothing like you.

Your heart sank at his words, the weight of missed opportunity pressing down on you. You forced a smile, trying to hide your disappointment. "Oh, hi Rina!" you managed to say, though your voice wavered slightly.

Rina beamed at you, oblivious to the turmoil inside you. "Nice to meet you! Beomgyu talks about you all the time," she said cheerfully, squeezing Beomgyu's hand affectionately.

You nodded, feeling a lump form in your throat. Kai's voice echoed in your mind, urging you to confess your feelings, but now it felt too late. You glanced at Beomgyu, trying to mask your emotions behind a facade of happiness for him. "I'm really happy for you both," you said softly, your smile feeling more forced than ever.

Beomgyu looked at you with a hint of concern in his eyes, noticing the change in your demeanor. "Thanks," he said gently, reaching out to touch your arm briefly.

“Oh right, what were you gonna say?” Beomgyu asked, his voice filled with curiosity as he turned his attention back to you, oblivious to the turmoil raging within you.

You hesitated for a moment, caught off guard by his question. The truth hung heavy in the air, but with Rina standing there, her hand still intertwined with Beomgyu's, it felt like a betrayal to admit your feelings now.

"It's nothing," you replied with a forced smile, shaking your head slightly. "Just... congratulations again on your relationship with Rina. I'm really happy for you."

Beomgyu frowned slightly, sensing something unsaid in your response. "Are you sure?" he asked gently, concern evident in his eyes.

"Yeah, I'm sure," you insisted, trying to sound convincing. "It was nice meeting you, Rina. I’m gonna get some popcorn. Or go to the toilet actually.” You laughed.

As you retreated to the concession stand, you couldn't shake the feeling of regret and sadness. Kai's voice echoed in your mind once more, urging you to be honest with yourself and with Beomgyu. But now, it felt like too little, too late.

You leaned against the wall, taking deep breaths to steady yourself. The weight of unspoken words and missed chances hung heavily on your heart, leaving you grappling with what could have been if only you had spoken up sooner.

–

“Well if it isn’t my favourite couple!” Yeonjun grinned as he wrapped his long lanky arms across you and Beomgyu’s shoulder. 

“Why are we here again?” Taehyun sighed. “Thought we were done with him.”

“Unfortunately I don’t think we’ll be getting rid of the devil any time soon.” Beomgyu mumbled, his hands still around your waist.

The five of you gazed upon the tall fucking building that Soobin had invited all of you to. His pre-wedding party. A day you dreaded. You didn’t understand why he bothered inviting the lot of you. You weren’t friends well at least not anymore. 

The room was decorated in the colours cobalt blue with tiny tinges of gold which made you gag.

“Stop looking so…” Kai thought as he looked at you. He paused, unable to find words to describe the sad look on your face.

“Ugly?” Yeonjun muttered.

“I was going to say worried.”

“We do NOT need this type of negative energy tonight. We are out here as sworn brothers.” Taehyun spoke before looking at you, “And sister! Tonight we breach the enemy’s headquarters but we shall rise above all else and make it out alive.”

“Y’know she’s allowed to feel whatever she’s feeling.” Beomgyu said, surprising everyone. 

“A level headed response from our group’s own comedic legend? Ladies and gentlemen, we have officially landed in Neverland.” Yeonjun said. 

“Shut up, asshat.” Beomgyu deadpanned, “I just think we should be supportive friends tonight.”

“I’m fine, Gyu. Thanks. Actually, I’m feeling fine. Sure, the person I once loved is marrying someone else. Sure, I was in love with him for like a billion years. Sure, it hurts to see him standing there with a beautiful girl in his arms with a hundred people congratulating him.” 

“Once loved? Clear improvement! Applause for our friend who has matured.” Kai cheered.

“Any other positives there?” Yeonjun asked.

“Yeah. I still have you guys!” You beamed. “4 equally annoying, equally shitty assholes that somehow manage to make everything a little bit better!” 

“But like…you like me better though right?” Kai coughed.

“Meh.” 

Just a few moments later, you found yourself situated in the balcony, getting fresh air away from well everyone and everything. Beomgyu appeared behind you.

“Hey.”

"Hey," you replied softly, not turning to face Beomgyu. The city lights sprawled out before you, a sea of twinkling distractions that offered solace from the chaotic scene inside.

Beomgyu leaned against the balcony railing beside you, his presence a comforting weight in the tense air. "You doing okay?"

You nodded, but the knot in your stomach betrayed your attempt at nonchalance. "Yeah, just... wasn't expecting all this, you know?"

"Yeah," Beomgyu sighed, his voice tinged with understanding. "It's a lot to take in."

You finally turned to look at him, catching the sincerity in his eyes. Despite the teasing and banter among your friends, Beomgyu's gaze held an unwavering concern that spoke volumes. "Thanks Gyu for always being here for me." you murmured, your voice barely above a whisper.

"Always," he replied softly, a small smile tugging at his lips. "Even if we're forced into attending devil's parties."

You chuckled weakly, grateful for his attempt to lighten the mood. "Seriously, though. You...all of you have been my rocks through all of this."

"We're always here," Beomgyu reassured you, his voice gentle. "No matter what."

The sincerity in his words warmed you, and for a fleeting moment, the weight on your chest felt a little lighter. "I appreciate that," you admitted, turning your gaze back to the city lights.

Silence settled between you, comfortable and companionable. The night breeze swept around the balcony, carrying away some of the tension that had built up inside you.

Beomgyu chuckled softly, his eyes crinkling at the corners with genuine warmth. "No tears today though? Impressive."

"Or maybe I've just reached the peak of emotional numbness," you joked, though there was a hint of truth in your words.

He nudged your shoulder playfully. "Nah. You've always been resilient, even when things get tough."

You tilted your head, considering his words. "Maybe you're right. I guess I've spent enough time wallowing."

"Exactly," Beomgyu nodded, his voice earnest. "It's okay to feel whatever you're feeling, but it's also okay to move forward."

"Besides, there are plenty of other fish in the sea," you added with a wry smile, trying to inject a bit of levity into the moment.

Beomgyu chuckled softly. "Exactly. And who knows, maybe one of those fish will surprise you."

You nodded thoughtfully, appreciating his attempt to lighten the mood. "Yeah, maybe."

Beomgyu looked over to you. He found you especially pretty that night. He pinched himself.

'Don't make a move on her, you idiot.' He thought to himself.

Beomgyu cleared his throat, suddenly feeling self-conscious under your gaze.

"So, any particular fish caught your eye tonight?" he asked with a playful grin.

 "I don't know so far the only fish worth seeing is you."

Your playful remark caught Beomgyu off guard, causing a slight blush to rise to his cheeks. He chuckled nervously, his playful grin faltering for a moment as he processed your words.

"Smooth," he managed to reply, his tone a mix of surprise and amusement. "But seriously, I hope I'm not the only fish you're stuck with tonight."

You laughed softly, appreciating his attempt to lighten the mood once more. "If I'm being honest, you're the only fish I'd want to be stuck with tonight."

Beomgyu's smile widened, a warmth spreading through him at your words. "I'm honoured," he replied sincerely, his gaze softening as he looked at you.

"You don't have to thank me too much though," he finally said, his voice gentle. "Being there for you, supporting you—it's just what friends do, right?"

"Right...friends..." Your voice trailed off, sensing a shift in the atmosphere between you and Beomgyu. The word "friends" hung in the air.

Beomgyu hesitated, his gaze flickering between your eyes as if searching for something. "Yeah," he agreed softly, his tone thoughtful. "Friends."

—

The five of you didn’t spend long there. In fact, none of you even bothered waiting for Soobin to make his obligatory rounds to your group. Within 20 minutes, you eagerly departed for the nearest diner around the corner.

The air was still, the night unusually calm. Your heart had raced furiously earlier, but now you felt surprisingly composed. A bit melancholic before the party, perhaps, but now? You were okay.

You exchanged glances with your four friends, then locked eyes with Beomgyu.

Ah, Beomgyu. Your rock. Your closest friend in the world. Secretly, you knew you probably favored him over the others. Though you’d never admit it to Kai. Beomgyu was amazing. Wonderful. Handsome. Kind. Funny.

You shook your head forcefully.

No. He’s your best friend. You can’t, shouldn’t, and won’t fall for ANOTHER best friend, especially one who you know would never feel the same way.

But his hair... so well-kept, smelling faintly of peaches.

Nope. Not today!

His lips... soft, plump, and so...

“Dude,” Yeonjun interrupted, nudging you.

“Huh? What?” You snapped out of your reverie, jolted back to reality.

“Your order?” Yeonjun nodded towards the server.

“Oh, right!”

—

It was late at night, and the world outside had quieted down to a gentle hum. You lay in bed, bathed in the soft glow of your bedside lamp. Tonight, however, your mind kept circling back to one person: Beomgyu.

You couldn't shake the memories of the day, the way Beomgyu's laughter had echoed in your mind, his smile etched vividly in your thoughts.

As you lay there, thoughts tangled and emotions swirling, you realised with a sudden clarity that your feelings for Beomgyu had resurfaced. Your heart skipped a beat at the realisation, and you couldn't deny the surge of excitement mixed with apprehension.

But you knew better than to let yourself fall for him again. You remembered the pain of unrequited love, the heartache of hoping for something that couldn't be. You couldn't bear the thought of opening up your heart once more, only to risk getting hurt all over again.

With a sigh, you pushed aside those burgeoning feelings, burying them deep within as a protective measure. You reminded yourself of the importance of guarding your heart, of prioritising your own emotional well-being.

Except... you weren't one to prioritise your own well-being. You were drawn to the allure of risking it all, of plunging into the unknown even when it meant potential heartache.

So there you were, wide awake in the stillness of the night, wrestling with an irrational urge to head over to Beomgyu's house and confess your sudden realisation of feelings.

The thought gnawed at you, refusing to be ignored. What if this time was different? What if Beomgyu felt the same way? The uncertainty was both terrifying and exhilarating, stirring a whirlwind of emotions within you.

Before you could overthink it further, you found yourself grabbing your keys and slipping out into the quiet darkness. The drive to Beomgyu's house was a blur, adrenaline coursing through your veins as you wrestled with doubts and hopes in equal measure.

Arriving at his doorstep, you hesitated for a moment, your heart pounding against your chest. With a deep breath to steady yourself, you knocked softly, the sound echoing in the silence of the night.

—--

As soon as Beomgyu arrived home, he climbed onto his bed and slid under the covers. The events of the evening replayed in his mind like a movie on repeat, each scene vivid and etched with emotions he struggled to make sense of..

Having active and lively monologues was a frequent occurrence. Sure, it helped him rationalize his thoughts and emotions, but it also bruised his ego and dragged him into the depths of despair when he realized how chaotic his own thoughts and emotions were, beyond rescue.

Dear God, how he wished he had no emotions whatsoever. 

Bzzz.

Gyu: You okay?  You: Yep. Why are you still awake? It’s 3. Gyu: Could say the same to you.

His fingers hovered over the keyboard.

He typed, “Wanna come over?”. He erased the message and shook his head.

He typed again, “I’m feeling kinda lonely and I miss you. Come over?” He erased the message and let out a sigh in frustration.

 He typed again, “I think I like you.” He erased the message and screamed into his pillow. 

Bzzz.

You: Open the door.

Beomgyu walked over to his door and there you were, in the flesh, almost as if he manifested it.

“What... what are you doing here?”

“Look… I’m done,” you sighed, your voice trembling with emotion. “I can’t be your pretend girlfriend anymore. I don’t want to keep lying to everyone.”

“What... what’s the sudden—”

“I should’ve done this a long time ago. I should’ve told you the truth and I should’ve been more brave about my feelings. If I've learnt anything from the situation with Soobin is that I've spent too long wallowing in being fearful I'd get rejected but -”

“What?”

"That movie night years ago with that Rina girl... I had feelings for you. Strong ones," you admitted, the words tumbling out in a rush. "I had planned to tell you that night."

Beomgyu gazed at you, his face a blend of surprise and confusion. His thoughts raced, connecting dots from the past, comprehending the unspoken tension and meaningful glances between you.

"I... I had no idea," he finally murmured, his voice barely audible.

“I know,” you nodded, tears welling up in your eyes. “But now you do.”

The room fell silent, tension thick in the air as you both stood there, words hanging between you like a delicate thread.

"And... tonight... I was in bed. I was doing a lot of thinking," you continued, your voice steadying as you gathered your thoughts. "I thought of Soobin, and I've come to the conclusion that I'm glad he's getting married and I'm glad he's happy. I've been holding onto my resentment towards him, but it's time to let that go. It was a dick move for him to move on so quickly from what could've been, but he fell in love. I couldn't... I couldn't possibly stand in the way of love."

Beomgyu listened intently, trying to grasp the significance of your words as they hung in the air between you.

"I don't understand—" he started to say.

"And then... I thought of you," you interrupted softly, your gaze meeting his with a mixture of vulnerability and determination. "I thought about what you've done for me in the past few years. The moments we've shared, the laughter, the support. What we have..."

Beomgyu's expression softened, his eyes searching for understanding. "What about it?" he asked, his voice barely above a whisper.

"I realised..." you began, your voice wavering slightly as you laid bare the truth of your heart. "I realised that I've been denying myself something real. Something I've wanted for so long but was too afraid to admit."

A flicker of hope lit up in Beomgyu's eyes, a spark of understanding dawning on him as he processed your confession.

“I know you don’t feel the same way but–” you started, your voice faltering as you braced yourself for the inevitable letdown.

Beomgyu's brows furrowed slightly, his expression shifting from anticipation to concern. "Wait," he interrupted softly, reaching out to gently grasp your hands in his. "Don't assume what I feel."

Your heart skipped a beat at his words, uncertainty mingling with a glimmer of hope. "But you never said..." you trailed off, unable to hide the vulnerability in your voice.

Beomgyu took a deep breath, his gaze steady as he searched for the right words. "I've been afraid," he confessed quietly. "Afraid of losing our friendship, of making things awkward between us. You may not know this but I've...loved you. For as long as I can remember. You constantly talked about Soobin. You were in love with him, for Pete's sake. I couldn't...I couldn't do that to either of you."

Your heart sank, burdened by unspoken fears and missed opportunities. "Oh," you murmured, struggling to steady your voice amidst a whirlwind of emotions. "But the girls... Look, one reason I've hesitated to tell you how much I like you is because of how different the girls you've dated are from who I am. We're...literal opposites."

"Look every girl I possibly dated, if they had at least a single common trait that you had? I’d immediate associate them with you. In my mind, there is no one BUT you." He sighed.

"And," Beomgyu interjected softly, gently squeezing your hands, "that doesn't mean I haven't thought about... about us and what might have been.""

"You have?" you whispered, your voice barely audible.

Beomgyu nodded, a small smile playing on his lips. "Yeah," he admitted, his eyes never leaving yours. "I've thought about what it would be like if we took that step."

Your breath caught in your throat, a mix of relief and joy flooding through you. "So... what does that mean?" you asked softly, needing to hear him say the words.

Beomgyu took a step closer, closing the gap between you until you were standing inches apart. "It means," he began, his voice tinged with both apprehension and determination, "that I like you. More than I've admitted before. In fact, Yeonjun probably has written a book about all the times I’ve called him to giggle over every interaction we’ve had.” 

You couldn't help but chuckle at his admission, a wave of affection washing over you. "Really?" you teased back, your heart fluttering with newfound hope.

“So what happens now? Soobin…” Beomgyu’s voice trailed off.

“Is in the past,” you replied firmly, meeting his gaze with unwavering determination. “Whatever happened with Soobin doesn’t matter anymore. This is about us, right here, right now.”

“Bro, you are sooo in love with me.” Beomgyu teased.

"Well, maybe just a little," you admitted with a shy smile, your heart beating a little faster as you looked into his eyes.

Beomgyu's expression softened, his gaze unwavering as he reached out to gently cup your cheek. "I'm glad you're here, you know? I've wanted to say this for a while."

Your breath caught at his touch, the sincerity in his voice stirring something deep within you. "I'm glad too," you replied softly, leaning into his hand.

He hesitated for a moment, as if gathering his thoughts. "I... I don't want to rush things. But I also don't want to hold back anymore."

"I understand," you nodded, your fingers lightly tracing patterns on his chest. "We'll take it one step at a time."

Beomgyu smiled, his eyes bright with affection. "One step at a time," he echoed, leaning in closer until his forehead rested against yours. "Thank you for being patient with me."

Your eyes fluttered to his lips. “I know we said slow but like…” You looked back at his lips.

Before you could finish your sentence, Beomgyu closed the remaining distance between you, capturing your lips in a tender kiss. The world seemed to fade away as his warmth enveloped you, melting any remaining hesitation. His lips moved against yours with a gentle urgency, as if every moment they weren't touching was a missed opportunity.

You responded eagerly, your fingers tangling in his hair, pulling him closer. The kiss deepened.

When you finally pulled back, breathless and flushed, Beomgyu rested his forehead against yours. His hand found yours, fingers intertwining as if to anchor you both in this shared reality.

"I'm sorry," he murmured softly, his voice tinged with emotion. "I couldn't wait any longer."

“So should we tell Yeonjun? I fear he’s probably the most excited that we finally happened.” 

Beomgyu chuckled softly, his forehead still resting against yours as he considered your question. His thumb traced gentle circles on the back of your hand, a silent reassurance in his touch.

"I think Yeonjun might have guessed already," he replied with a teasing grin, his eyes opening to meet yours. "But we should definitely tell him. And the others too. They've been rooting for us, in their own unique ways."

You nodded, a smile spreading across your face at the thought of sharing your happiness with your friends. "They'll be thrilled," you agreed, squeezing his hand affectionately.

—

It’d been a day or two since the two of you confessed to one another. You wouldn’t call yourselves official but you did spend the entire two days…well let’s just say, you’d be forced to wear a turtleneck all week.

"Gyu, I swear to God, you're an idiot," you muttered under your breath as you carefully applied another layer of foundation to your neck.

"What?" Beomgyu replied, his tone teasing and smug.

You shot him a playful glare in the mirror. "You've given me the biggest hickey ever. I'm going to have to wear a turtleneck all week just to hide it."

Beomgyu chuckled, unapologetic. "I couldn't help it."

Rolling your eyes, you finished blending the makeup and turned to face him. "Well, I hope you're happy. I look like I got attacked by a vampire."

"Maybe I am a vampire," Beomgyu quipped, leaning in to kiss you on the cheek.

You swatted him away playfully. "You're lucky I like you so much."

"Well...its about time we spill the beans." Beomgyu spoke.

"What beans?" you asked, raising an eyebrow in mock suspicion.

Beomgyu's eyes twinkled with excitement. "About us, of course. I think it's time everyone knows."

"Us? I'm sorry... I don't recall you ever asking me to be... um... yours," you replied, trying to lighten the moment with a teasing tone. Beomgyu blinked, momentarily taken aback by your response. He chuckled softly, a hint of nervousness in his voice.

"Well, maybe I haven't formally asked yet, but... I thought we were on the same page."

You raised an eyebrow playfully. "Oh, is that so? And what page is that, exactly?"

He took a step closer, his expression earnest. "The page where we're Snow White and the prince and we live happily ever after without having to ask, 'Wanna be my girlfriend?'"

You chuckled at Beomgyu's whimsical analogy, feeling a mix of amusement and affection for his earnestness.

"Snow White and the prince, huh?" you mused, your teasing tone softening into a smile. "That's quite the fairy tale you're painting."

Beomgyu nodded, a shy smile playing on his lips. "Yeah, well... I guess I just thought... with everything between us..."

You studied his expression, seeing the vulnerability behind his playful facade. "Hey, I get it," you reassured him gently, reaching out to lightly touch his arm. "And you're right. We've been dancing around this for a while now."

He nodded again, his gaze meeting yours with a mix of hope and uncertainty. "So... does this mean...?"

You chuckled softly, feeling your heart swell with warmth. "It means I'm willing to give this fairy tale a shot," you said softly, a playful glint in your eye. "But you still owe me a proper date, somewhere that doesn’t involve us immediately having our clothes off within the first 5 minutes of the movie, prince charming."

Beomgyu's face lit up with relief and happiness, his arms instinctively pulling you into a warm embrace. "Deal," he murmured against your hair. "but maybe if you weren't so sexy I wouldn't be doing all that in the first place."

"So you're saying I should be glad?" You rolled your eyes.

—

The boys were seated across from you, their banter filling the air with a familiar comfort.

“Guys… Beomgyu and I have an announcement,” you declared, your voice slicing through their chatter.

Yeonjun glanced up first, his eyebrows raised in curiosity. "Oh? What’s up?"

Kai nudged him playfully. "Finally gonna admit you’re dating?"

Beomgyu chuckled, shaking his head. "Well, actually..."

“NO FUCKING WAY! I TOLD YOU THOSE WERE HICKEYS AND YOU WERE LIKE… ‘no she just hurt herself with a curling iron…’” Kai yelled, his voice filled with mock indignation.

“Yes, Kai, tell the whole damn world about the hickeys on my neck,” you replied sarcastically, rolling your eyes.

“Sorry,” Kai muttered sheepishly, realising he may have overstepped.

“I’m so glad. I’ve been tired of hearing Beomgyu complain over his unrequited crush on you for years. Like thank God, you shut this bitch up.” Yeonjun grinned. 

The banter continued, laughter echoing around the table as Beomgyu blushed slightly at Kai's teasing. "Hey, it wasn't that bad," he protested weakly, shooting a playful glare at Yeonjun.

Yeonjun leaned forward, a mischievous glint in his eyes. "So, does this mean we're finally going to get invited to a wedding?"

You chuckled, shaking your head at their antics. "Let's get through the first date without any disasters, and then we can talk about weddings."

Taehyun, ever the voice of reason, raised an eyebrow. "You mean the first date where you won't have hickeys all over your neck?"

You groaned, burying your face in your hands as the table erupted in laughter again. Beomgyu squeezed your hand under the table, his eyes filled with affection and amusement. Despite the teasing and the playful banter, you couldn't help but feel grateful for the camaraderie and support of your friends.

"Yeah, yeah," you sighed dramatically, smiling despite yourself. "Next time, I'll make sure to use a better cover story."

As the laughter subsided, Beomgyu leaned in closer to you, his voice soft and sincere. "Thank you for putting up with these idiots."

You squeezed his hand back, feeling a rush of warmth at his touch. "Anytime," you replied with a smile, knowing that with Beomgyu by your side, even the teasing and the unexpected could be turned into moments of joy and connection.

---------

Beomgyu shuffled his feet, knocking on Soobin's door. "OPEN UP, DUMBASS!"

The door swung open, revealing Soobin in a worn-out shirt. Behind Soobin stood a person Beomgyu had never seen before.

“Shit. We didn’t know you were gonna have company.” Beomgyu grinned at Soobin.

“I literally told you guys in the group chat yesterday,” Soobin rolled his eyes as he grabbed the bag of chips out of Beomgyu’s arms.

“Well, hello there.” Kai donned his infamous sheepish smile, extending a hand, “I’m Huening Kai. You can call me Huening or Kai but people usually call me handsome kid.”

“I’ll be sure to call you the latter then.” You giggled, accepting his handshake.

Beomgyu placed the bags of snacks on the table and walked over to the new person Soobin had been raving about. He finally looked over to you and... you were... well, stunning. Your eyes were deep and expressive, drawing him in, while your smile both shy and captivating.

His hands, which had already opened a bag of chips, stopped as he took a moment to appreciate her beauty before getting snapped back into reality.

“Hi.” You said, introducing yourself.

“Hi, I’m Beomgyu!” He smiled, a little nervous. His mind blanked, and he didn't know how else to continue the conversation.

The pause lingered for a heartbeat too long, making the air feel thick with anticipation. Beomgyu could feel his cheeks warming up, but he tried to keep his composure.

Soobin pulled you aside, whispering something to you before pulling you into the kitchen to prepare snacks.

"Dude, you're staring. I hope you choke on a fly." Kai chuckled.

Beomgyu snapped out of his daze and shot Kai an embarrassed look.

"Shut up."

Kai chuckled, clearly enjoying Beomgyu’s discomfort. “I’m just saying, if you keep looking at her like that, you might as well introduce yourself as ‘the guy who couldn’t stop staring.’”

Beomgyu rolled his eyes but couldn’t help the smile tugging at his lips. “Whatever. She’s just... really pretty.”

“Yeah, I noticed,” Kai teased, nudging Beomgyu with his elbow. “But don’t worry, you didn’t make it too obvious.”

“Great,” Beomgyu muttered sarcastically. “Let’s just get through tonight without me embarrassing myself further.”

Kai patted him on the back. “You’ll be fine. Just be yourself.”

As Beomgyu watched you and Soobin laughing together in the kitchen, he took a deep breath and nodded. “Yeah, just be myself.”

[brotherwtf]

i feel like these lyrics would be super fitting for an sports au where bucky’s a football/rugby/baseball (basically any sports with a ball hahah) player

Shirts off, and your friends lift you up over their heads

Beer sticking to the floor

Cheers chanted, cause they said

There was no chance, trying to be

The greatest in the league

Where's the trophy?

He just comes running over to me

Touch down

Call the amateurs and

Cut 'em from the team

Ditch the clowns, get the crown

Baby I'm the one to beat

Cause the sign on your heart

Said it's still reserved for me

Honestly, who are we to fight the alchemy?

ahhh that is so cute! I'm thinking a college au maybe? classic jock/nerd au with Bucky and Gale, super cute and sweet

Gale is going to school for astrophysics and astronomy, he hopes to do research or possibly become a professor once he gets his PhD

John signed on to play D1 baseball, but studies literature when he's not playing

They almost never cross paths, but when they do meet it's classic romcom bullshit

Gale is running late to an exam and John is late to practice and they literally run into each other on campus

Gale is knocked flat on his ass, books and pencils falling from his backpack and John immediately feels bad

It doesn't help that John is the most beautiful person Gale has seen, or that John is literally drowning in Gale's blue eyes bcs they just kinda sit there

It isn't until Gales scrambling for his books and pens that John finally snaps out of it and helps him up and desperately asks Gale for his number

Gale blushes as he gives it to John, and basically runs to his exam, John thinks about him all during practice and his teammates make fun of him endlessly

They start texting and talking more, meeting at the library or the dining hall and just talking

Gale finally musters up the courage to ask John on a proper date and John is absolutely ecstatic

They go into the city and get dinner and ice cream, after that just sort of wandering around until Gale says he should probably get back

John walks Gale all the way to his dorm, and presses a shy kiss to his lips to say goodbye, and Gale blushes endlessly

They start dating, and Gale starts going to more of John's baseball games to support him (aka look at John's ass and thighs in those tight baseball pants)

He doesn't quite understand the game, but always cheers for John when he's batting. John always beams the brightest when he can see Gale in the crowd, sometimes blowing him a kiss before hitting it out of the park

What if during one of their championship games, it's the bottom of the ninth, they're all tied up, bases loaded, and Johns up to bat. Gale is in the crowd, obviously, and he's nervous, wringing his hands together in anticipation

It's a full count (Three balls and two strikes) and this next pitch could either make or break their win. The entire crowd watches in anticipation, leaning forward in their seats

John looks into the crowd and spots Gale, blows him a kiss before turning back to the pitcher. Gale is probably thinking "you dummy, you don't have time for that now you need to focus"

And John hits a fucking grand slam and the crowd screams. Gale literally jumps to his feet and cheers when John rounds all the bases and returns to home with the rest of his team hugging and grabbing him

John manages to pull himself away from his team and finds Gale who's made his way up to the edge of the bleachers. He pulls John into an enthusiastic kiss and hugs him so close he feels like John might struggle to breathe, but he's too fucking proud of John to care

A couple of their teammates (I'm thinking like Curt and Rosie) pour Gatorade over John's head while he's still hugging Gale and then immediately regret it once they see they accidently soaked Gale, but Gale is laughing too hard to actually care

The boys try to drag John out to the bar, but he insists on staying behind and celebrating quietly with Gale, who just beams at the thought

In celebration, they go into the city and get ice cream, just like their first date

eeekk I loved this one! nerd/jock tropes are one of my favorites I hold them near and dear to my heart. lmk if you guys have any more hcs for this!

[naturalbornsnickerdoodle]

sick of you | bang chan (fluff)

Pairing: sick!Chan x reader

Word count: 2.1k words

Rating: SFW / PG-13

Genre: Fluff

Warnings: Some curse words here and there, suggestive conversations. Not proofread

Summary: Chan gets sick during preparations of a new comeback and reader takes care of him. 

Author’s note: Imagine it’s a scene from a sitcom or romcom. I made this longer than intended, my apologies. But I hope it entertains you <3 I’m open to feedback, please let me know if there are grammar mistakes or mispelled words. Thanks for reading, enjoy!

It was a normal afternoon, you were typing away at your computer, sipping at your iced tea while listening to the city’s sounds, a light breeze coming through the open windows.

Happy with your written progress, you stretched your arms above you when your phone started buzzing. It was a text from Felix.

🐥: Y/N, Chris is on his way home, whatever he says don’t let him talk you into thinking he’s okay, ‘cause he’s not.

Y/N: oh no, what happened?

🐥: not sure, but he looked really tired and was cranky af. It took all of us plus the managers to make him leave.

Y/N: Jesus...this man and his hyper independence is gonna be the death of me. Anyways, I’ll check up on him, Lix. Thanks for the heads up ❤️

🐥: No problem, good luck!

You put your phone down as you heard the apartment’s front door open. Soon enough, your boyfriend entered the living room where you were currently working. Your heart sank at the sight of Chan. The man looked pale and exhausted at first glance, but then his face lit up as he saw you and tried to greet you with a sweet smile.

“Hey baby” you smiled back at him, typing a little on your computer saving your document, as he put his bag down and entered the kitchen

“Hi babe, I’ll be back in a sec, want some water first” he called back

You stood from your working station stretching out some more before making your way to the kitchen.

“Hi” you say as you came close to him puckering your lips a little to properly greet him, but he was busy chugging down on his water bottle, holding up a single finger, signaling for you to wait.

“What, no kiss? Man, chivalry is dead after all”

Chris side eyed you as he took his last gulps of water. He chuckled at your comment when he was done with his water.

“Sorry, babe. Was pretty thirsty, it’s really hot out” he said while discarding the empty plastic bottle in the recycling bin

“Is it? thought the weather was kinda nice today”

He chuckled a little “yeah well you’ve always been more sensitive to cold, can’t tell how hot it’s out there”

“Fair point. So what’s with the hoodie?”

He stopped on his tracks at your question. “Pardon?”

“Hoodie’s are for chilly days, yeah? You said it yourself, I’m sensitive to cold, and I’m not even wearing one. So, hoodie?”

“Oh well uh I wore it during practice and didn’t feel like taking it off, that’s all”

You let out a soft “a-ha”, your tongue pushing your inner cheek, arms crossed as you looked at him warily.

“Whatever, you must be hungry, want something to eat?”

“Oh, no thanks, I’m good. I’ll wait til dinner time”

You stared back at him not saying a word for a few seconds blinking a few times

“That’s it, I’m not having it”

You marched into the living room to retrieve your phone, pretending to call someone. Chan followed immediately

“hey hey where are you going? Babe, what are you doing?” He asked as he saw you tapping away at your phone screen.

“Contacting JYP to file a complaint. They broke my boyfriend”

“What? Don’t be ridiculous”

“I mean it’s either that or they somehow managed to clone their idols and sent me the wrong one”

“this is crazy”

“oh is it? Help me out here: you came home in the middle of the afternoon, with no appetite, sweating profusely, white as a ghost AND didn’t even come close to say hello to me properly. Does that sound like the Christopher we know?”

“Yes???” he said increasing the pitch of his voice 

You narrowed your eyes at his poor attempt of justifying this nonesense.

“Bullshit. I’m calling the boys”

“Okay okay okay you’re right. I’m sorry. I’m not feeling well, alright?”

“I knew it!”

“But I mean, it’s not that bad”

“If it’s not that bad, why didn’t you kiss me then?”

“Oh come on, what if was a lil sick, I didn’t want you to get sick either”

“sure...”

“I swear I’m good! Honestly I would’ve stayed practicing for longer but the guys wouldn’t let me. So they asked me to come home”

You chuckled at the last part

“What’s so funny?”

“They kicked you out, Christopher. Ha-ha”

He let out a long sigh, clearly not amused at your comments as he usually would be, but still planting his famous thin lined smile on his face (the one that looks like this :] )

“Okay, enough with the sitcom jokes. Come here, you said you were feverish?”

“I think so, I didn’t feel this warm back in the practice room”

You came closer to him and placed your palm on his forehead, eyebrows knitting together as you felt how warm he actually was.

“Yeah, you must’ve gotten warmer on your way here. Did you get one of the company cars to drive you?”

“No, I walked here”

“You walked all the way here from the JYP building?!”

“It’s a 20 minute walk, it’s not that far, Y/N”

“for a person that’s burning hot, it is”

“Aww stop babe, you’re making me blush” he lightly pushes your shoulder

“Funny. And that blush is from your fever, you dummy. You should be more careful next time, Chan.”

“I thought the walk would make me feel better, okay? you know, with the weather being nice and all.”

“Well, we need to break that fever ASAP, come on”

You took his hand on yours and led him to your shared bedroom. You instructed him to remove his clothes and put on some comfy ones.

While he was at it, you grabbed the first aid kit which had a thermometer and your stash of over-the-counter meds. You took the little device out along with the Tylenol bottle.

“Put this under your armpit while I bring some more things, yeah?”

He just nodded and took the little device from your hands, doing as he was told.

You were done getting some ice water and washcloths plus a new water bottle from the kitchen when you heard Chan call from your bedroom.

“Babeeee”

“Yeah?”

“The um the the, the thingy says 38.8ºC” struggling to get the device’s name right

“Okay I’ll be there in a sec” you replied, and you weren’t wrong, his fever was in fact high.

You found him cross-legged on the bed, still looking pale and kinda drowsy. Your heart sank once again after seeing your boyfriend stay so still and weak. You knew your heart would do that a lot today, at least until his fever broke.

“Sit back for me, honey” you asked him while removing the covers

“Say please?” he said arching his eyebrow at you

You let out a short yet exhasperated sigh at his teasing, then tried to smile at him so he would comply to your requests

“I’m joking, babe” he chuckled and then sat back against the headboard.

You got to work quickly, handing him the medicine first, following with the open water bottle. After he took the pill, you asked him to lay down so you could put the ice cold compress on his forehead. He, being the drama llama that he was when sick, yelped the moment the washcloth barely grazed his face.

Laughing at him you said “Babyyy I can’t get it on you if you keep squirming! I promise the cold will vanish after a while. Pleaseeee”

He held his breath right before you put it on him, still yelping and closing his eyes but not moving this time.

“Thank you, now try to rest for a little, I’ll make you something to eat. Chicken soup sound good?”

Without moving an inch, Chan tried to look up at you through the compress that was blocking his view, and only managed to do a thumbs up and say “sounds great”

You planted a kiss on his cheek before leaving, asking him to let you know if he needed anything.

After a little while, you entered your bedroom holding a tray with a big biwl of soup and some mini breads, that way the medicine wouldn’t make your boyfriend’s stomach upset.

You set the tray down on your night table, then slowly sat down on the edge of your bed, gently placing your hand on his abdomen.

“Chan? Babe?”

He abruptly woke up from his slumber, supporting himself on his elbows with the compress hanging over one of his eyes.

“What? Yeah? I’m up, what’s- I’m up”

You chuckled at how confused he looked.

“You fell asleep for a little bit, it’s okay” You told him, now both of your hands on his body, trying to get him to relax.

“I got you some soup, but I’m gonna need you to sit up, okay? please?”

He mumbled in agreement and quickly rested his back against the headboard once more.

“I was resting my eyes for a minute” he said removing the now warm compress from his face

“Seems like the meds kicked in pretty hard, huh? Careful, it’s hot” you said as you placed the tray in front of him, above his legs. Then took the compress from his hand and placed it in the bowl full of ice water.

“They better, got lots to do before the next comeback”

You hummed in disapproval “well, if you rest properly I’m sure you’ll be ready”

“By properly you mean only tonight, yeah?”

“You’re on thin ice, Bang”

“Oh come on, I told you it’s not that bad. I’m sure it’s just like a mild cold or something” he said taking a spoonful of soup, then yelping at how hot it was.

“Told you it was hot”

“Thought you meant I waz hot” tongue hanging out of his mouth from the burn

You laughed throwing your head back “Oh lord, take it as karma for not wanting to rest for a couple more days”

He took a sip of his water then grabbed the spoon once more to take another spoonful of his chicken soup.

“Blow it” you reminded him, and regretted saying it as soon as the words left your mouth, closing your eyes.

“Babe, I’d love to but I’m sick you know?”

“I MEANT BLOW ON YOUR SOUP YOU LITTLE SHIT”

His laugh filled the room, body shaking with amusement as your hands covered your face in a mix of frustration and laughter.

Once his laughter died down, you looked at him fondly, watching him carefully eat his soup.

You talked a bit more about this and that. Then you took his plate and tray away from him so he could rest properly now.

Back in your bedroom, you put on your pajamas and got a clean t-shirt on the bedside table, hoping chan’s fever would break in the middle of the night. You let him know where it was so he could change into it later.

You laid on your side of the bed, propped on one of your arms, you checked Chan’s cold compress and took it from him, putting it in the bowl. While you waited for it to get cold, you pressed your cheek to you boyfriend’s, who was taken aback by your action and tried to move away, afraid of getting you sick with whatever he had.

“Relax, I’m just checking how warm you are”

“Oh here I was thinking you just wanted to take advantage of an ill person” voice a little hoarser than before

“Me? Nah. I mean, I guess I could but you’re too tired to do anything”

He chuckled “I’m not too tired. I just don’t wanna get you sick, babe”

“Oh, but I am sick”

He looked at you puzzled, eyebrows knitting together and guilt spreading quickly across his face

“What?”

“yeah, sick of your shit” you burst into silent laughter at your silly dad joke, grabbing your own belly with one arm and hitting chan’s arm with the other

“should’ve seen it coming” slowly joining you with his own giggles

Once the laughter died down, you reached for the cold compress in the bowl.

“Okay, I’m putting a new washcloth on, babe”

Chan grimaced in anticipation and said okay. You counted to 3 then set the compress on his forehead. And yes, he did yelp again.

You couldn’t help but giggle, he looked cute with his rosey cheeks and a white little towel on his face. You planted a few kisses on his cheek before laying on his chest. Chan took the arm that was resting under your head and started caressing your arm, pulling you closer to him.

“Hey. Thank you for today, I appreciate it.” he squeezed your arm as he said it

“It’s alright, babe. I like taking care of you”

“You’re lying”

“I am”

You both chuckled at the last joke of the night. You said your I love you’s before closing your eyes and drifting into dreamland.

Chan was an awful, stubborn, terrible patient even, but he was yours and you’d take care of him for as long as you could.

Hope you liked it!

[iris-sistibly]

I know Queen of Tears is not everyone's cup of tea. But after reading some fans' sentiments and contemplating, I'd like to share my two cents/realisations on this:

1. I like that the story started out with a very realistic plot: a married couple falling apart but then rediscovered their love for each other. I do agree however about the sentiments of some viewers about the storytelling.

2. This isn't a romcom. It's a heavy drama with a couple of light and funny moments here and there. I would have appreciated it more if the writer focused mainly on the root cause/s of BaekHong's marriage falling apart:

The loss of their baby

Hae-in's family being toxic af (at the time)

And then shift the focus on their healing, and while BaekHong did eventually find their way back into love, it kinda throws me off that the show seems to divert the viewers' attention from that one crucial part of the story, the very reason why their marriage started to crumble and that is addressing the loss of their child. They briefly discussed it, but not as thorough as I personally would have liked (example: being honest about how they felt at the time, finding ways on how to properly handle their grief and acceptance of what happened, etc.).

Perhaps Hae-in could have expressed how she felt about her mother mistreating her all these years, then they could have been given more time to rebuild their relationship before she went to surgery.

3. Adding Eun-seong and Mo Seul-hee in the picture...I'm sorry to say this but it basically ruined the main plot's momentum. At this point, this whole revenge thingy is just "dragging" (like this bullshit is taking longer to unveil than BaekHong getting back together). I like the twists in the story but I think they overdid it, it's like one twist after another to the point that it becomes exhausting and it kills the excitement for some viewers.

Don't get me wrong, I still enjoy watching this show, I think the actors are great, they made me love and hate their characters, I highly appreciate the role reversals in the main characters, and I think it's still entertaining, I appreciate that Park Ji-eun tried to add something outside of the box to spice up the storyline, but yeah...idk how the show is gonna pull this shit off with only 2 episodes left.

[dynamic-power]

Arrivals

Prompt: airport confessions

Words: 1.6k (listen, it got away from me, okay?)

5 airport proposals flight attendant Ian Gallagher witnesses

“First time?”

Ian looks away from the newly engaged couple standing and kissing in the middle of arrivals, close enough to the bottom of the escalator that they are causing a bit of a traffic jam to instead stare at the pilot who has just materialized on said escalator, two steps above him. 

Ian recognizes him immediately; Pilot Milkovich. He’d been one of the pilots on the flight that had just flown Ian from Austin to Chicago. He’s shorter than Ian, but the steps give him height advantage. His eyes are a bright, warm blue and his smile is tense, but in a way that’s tired, not forced. He's tattooed, the most notable of which are the "fuck u-up" across his knuckles with a bandaid censoring the word on his right hand, but Ian already gets the feeling he's a bit softer than he let's on.

“First time…?” Ian trails off. First time flying as an attendant? No, but it’s only his fifth, so he’s new enough. First time in Chicago? Fuck no, he grew up here.

“First time witnessing this sappy bullshit,” Milkovich says, nodding towards the couple who are now fully making out. 

Ian steps off the escalator, wheeling his small bag closely behind him. Milkovich steps off after him, and together, they squeeze through the gathering crowd to head towards the taxi corral. 

“Does that happen a lot?” Ian asks when they’ve stepped outside. 

Milkovich shrugs. “Not a lot. But it does happen. I don’t know what it is about airports, but people find that shit real romantic.”

“Blame it on the romcoms,” Ian muses. 

Milkovich opens the door of a waiting cab. “Headed to the hotel?”

“No,” Ian says. “I’m crashing at my brother’s place.”

“You from Chicago?”

“Southside.”

“No shit,” Milkovich says, thumbing at an eyebrow. “Me too.”

“No shit. Not staying with family?”

“Fuck no. ‘Sides, I got a flight in about twelve hours.”

“Me too.”

Milkovich smiles. “First leg headed to New York?”

“Uh, yeah, actually.”

“I’ll see you there, Red.” Milkovich climbs into the back of the cab with a wave and a charming smile and Ian almost doesn’t notice the next cab pull up, too busy watching the back of Milkovich’s head through the window. 

---

“Y’know,” Mickey says as they are walking through arrivals side-by-side, both bags on the outside so that they are close enough that their hands brush, “It’s kind of a shitty thing to do.”

“What is?” Ian asks. 

Mickey waves a hand towards a woman standing off to the left. She’s holding a great big neon yellow posterboard that says, “Anna, will you marry me?” in loopy script. Ian’s been flying for two months, and already this is the second proposal he’s seen.

“I dunno,” Ian says with a shrug. “I think it’s kinda sweet. The grand gestures, and all.”

Mickey grunts. “Of course you would, Ian. You’re a real romantic at heart, aren’t you?”

“What’s your problem with it, then?”

Mickey swings open the back door of a cab. Ian grabs their bags and motions for the driver to open the trunk. He tosses their bags in the back before climbing in beside Mickey. “It’s all so public,” Mickey says after Ian shuts the door. “What if poor Anna doesn’t want to marry her girlfriend? She becomes the asshole if she says no. But she’s also the asshole if she says yes and has to tell her girlfriend later that the answer is no.”

“Why does the answer have to be no?” Ian challenges. 

“It doesn’t have to be,” Mickey says with a shake of his head. Sacramento comes to view in the distance. “But I’m just saying, if it is.”

“I think, if you’ve been in a relationship long enough to consider marriage, you’ve probably talked about it before. I don’t think people actually ask without already knowing the answer.”

“Thought about getting engaged a lot, have you?” Mickey teases. 

“No,” Ian insists, but he feels his face flush. “Whatever, fuck you.”

“I’m sure your future wife is just as much of a sap as you.”

Ian can’t help it; he laughs. “Uh. No. No, you’ve got me wrong. There is no future wife.”

He can feel Mickey staring at him, considering him, and he wonders briefly if he made a mistake. He stares down at his feet, waiting for the tense silence to come to an end. 

“Oh. Me, too,” Mickey says softly. 

Ian’s head whips up, eyes wide and mouth open. “You mean you’re…” he trails off, unable to get the word across his tongue. 

“Gay?” Mickey supplies for him, cheeks turning pink. He turns away from Ian and stares out the window. “Yeah, not a big deal.”

But Ian can’t help but continue to watch Mickey as though he’s seeing him for the first time.

---

“I’m meeting up with Carl for drinks,” Ian says as he and Mickey step onto the escalator. They are on one step, their bags on the one above them. “Would you wanna come?”

“Don’t you have a flight tomorrow morning?”

“Nah,” Ian says with a grin. “I traded with Lisa. She wanted to see her new niece, so she’s headed to Indy. I’ll be on your flight to Portland the day after.”

“Will you ever let me fly in fuckin’ peace, Gallagher?”

It’s been nearly six months, and Ian has enjoyed his flights with Mickey the most. “Nope.” They step into arrivals, and Ian asks again, “So, drinks?”

“Yeah, sure, whatever,” Mickey says, but Ian can see by his smile and the glint in his eyes that he’s pleased to have been invited. 

Ian’s pleased, too. He’s about to open his mouth, tell Mickey that Carl will be there with a date, and that he’d really like it if this was a date for them, too, when a man rushes by them. Mickey and Ian both turn just in time to see the man scooping a woman into his arms just a couple feet behind them. When he drops to his knees, Ian stops entirely and Mickey groans under his breath. 

“Lea,” the man says, shouting over the noise of people gasping and muttering and cheering around them, “will you marry me?”

Ian doesn’t get to see the reply because Mickey is gripping his elbow and pulling him away. “Come on, Red,” he says, sounding annoyed, but he’s smiling softly. “We gotta get to the hotel to clean up if you really want to go out tonight.”

Ian follows Mickey. When Mickey goes to pull his hand away from Ian’s arm, Ian catches it. He steels his nerves and twines their fingers together. “Mick, about tonight.”

---

“Of course I think we should keep living in Chicago,” Mickey says, gripping Ian’s hand as they step onto the escalator down to arrivals. LAX is busy today, people crowd them from every side, so he doesn’t hesitate to squeeze Mickey’s hand and pull him closer. “Your family is there, Mandy is there. I’m not saying we should move. I’m just saying you should move in with me.”

It makes sense, Ian knows it does; they’ve been together for a year, and his lease is coming to an end, and he hardly spends any time there, anyway. 

“Make it all official, and shit,” Mickey says.

“We should get a dog.”

“Who will watch the dog when we aren’t there?”

“We’ll share custody with Lip and the kids.”

“Lip would fuckin’ hate that.”

“Exactly.”

“We should think about making it really official.”

Ian freezes, nearly tripping as they get to the bottom of the escalator. “What?” he says, sure that Mickey couldn’t possibly mean what he thinks he means. 

“Yeah,” Mickey says, keeping a step ahead of Ian. His voice is soft, unsure. “I mean, it’s the next step, right? Get the house, the dog, then get-”

There’s a shriek to their left, and two men are hugging and crying and kissing. Mickey usually rolls his eyes and pulls Ian along. But this time, Ian nearly runs into him as Mickey stops and turns to watch. They linger, watch as one man slips a ring onto the other’s finger, watch as they kiss, and accept congratulations from people around them. Ian thinks, not for the first time, that it’s a rather sweet scene.

“Get married,” Mickey finally finishes. He sounds distracted, but looks up at Ian with wide, blue eyes. 

Ian’s heart is pounding. “You wanna marry me, Milkovich?”

Mickey shrugs and thumbs at his nose. Ian knows Mickey is nervous, too. “I might, Gallagher. I dunno.”

Ian reaches out and grabs Mickey’s hand, tangling their fingers together. “We can talk about it, if you want.”

“Let’s start with moving you into my place, yeah?”

“Yeah.”

---

Ian is glad to be back in Chicago. He’s only been away for a couple of days, but Mickey had been away for a few days before that, so it’s been a week since he’s seen his boyfriend and he’s really missing him. 

He’s scrolling through his messages as he takes the escalator down to arrivals, wondering why he hasn’t heard from Mickey, when movement ahead of him catches his eye. 

The crowd is parting, because Mickey is standing there, holding a bunch of flowers, with the entirety of Ian’s family standing just behind him. Ian suddenly can’t wait, takes the last few steps down and runs towards Mickey. He abandons his bag in favor of wrapping Mickey up in his arms. The flowers press akwardly against his back, but that doesn’t matter because his face is buried in Mickey’s neck and he’s home.

“I know you like this romantic crap,” Mickey mumbles, pushing Ian back so he’s at arms length. He hands Ian the flowers, which he eagerly accepts, and digs around in the pocket of his jeans for a moment. When he pulls his hand out again, he sinks to one knee, offering the silver ring out to Ian. 

Ian laughs. He laughs so hard he cries, or maybe he just cries. 

“This, uh, kinda felt appropriate, I guess,” Mickey says as he grins up him. “Marry me?”

Ian pulls Mickey up and into a kiss, wrapping his arms around Mickey’s shoulders, digging his fingers into his hair. 

“Is that a yes, Gallagher?” Mickey pants when Ian lets him go again. 

“Of course that’s a yes, Milkovich.”

[cherish--these--times]

Okay. BUCKLE UP.

To the people who say that we have no media literacy because we hoped til the very end that Ted and Rebecca would end up together: you can FUCK RIGHT OFF.

Recently, Hannah W. declared: "Is there chemistry beyond friendship? Yes, I think they do have that as well."

But beyond that, there were A MILLION OTHER WAYS they could have done the last season (and arguably season 2) differently than what they did to avoid any ambiguity as to Ted and Rebecca's relationship. They could have had them hang out all the bloody time and be the rock solid best friends in the world. Ted and Rebecca were never more than friendly co-workers since season 1 ended. That BFF, platonic bullshit was never a thing. If that was true, Ted would have had NO PROBLEM hugging the shit out of her in the stands in the last episode when she begged him to stay. Or again in the airport. They would have gushed over how they made each other's life better and it would have been beautiful and moving and perfectly reasonable. Instead it was loaded with unsaid stuff between two people who never dared to get too close to one another. Keeley was Rebecca's rock. Beard was Ted's. Ted and Rebecca were something else. They were connected in unfathomable, cosmic ways. A perfect set up for a romcom, even if you dislike the idea.

But okay, playing the devil's advocate here, if the platonic soulmates shtick was always the intent (and I don't care what people think, I'm not sure it was), why not have them fall in love with other people early on but keep them as a tightly-knit tandem? Why keep them apart so much throughout the show and both single for most of it???? Why even establish they were born to meet then they never see each other again at the end?? Romance aside, what was the fucking point of that??

Let's address your fucking condescension, shall we? I'll tell you what media literacy fucking taught me:

That Rebecca immediately sensing Ted was having a panic attack, following him, and missing him by a hair, is a classic trick for lovers in a "right place, wrong time" kinda way. If they didn't want to leave any space for ambiguity, she would have found him, comforted him and took him to Dr Fieldstone's office herself without this need to overdramatise and make us long for said comfort that she was unable but clearly desperate to provide.

That Ted texting her for the first time on screen (15 times!!!) because he wanted to hang out at night in a foreign city JUST WHEN SHE LOSES HER PHONE IN A CANAL is a classic SEE ABOVE!! Fuck all of you, honestly.

That one half of the equation carrying a matchbook in his pocket the other half had been obsessing over for months means he is the answer to her romantic quest. And before you go and say that everyone got a matchbook that night, THAT'S NOT THE FUCKING POINT. They chose to show that Ted, of aaaaaaall the people in the restaurant that night, had been carrying Rebecca's hopes and dreams in his pocket THE ENTIRE BLOODY TIME. It was an intentional, purposeful decision. They decided to drop that hot potato later on but you can't blame us for thinking it would lead somewhere!

That one half of the equation carried a trinket in her bag the other half gave her YEARS BEFORE, means he is the one for her. Why? Because this was something he gave her to make her feel safe! Letting someone wonderful love her without fear of being safe was the thing she canonically admitted she was afraid of in a ROMANTIC relationship! The fact that the army man happened to be stuck in the green matchbook was frankly TAKING THE PISS.

That Ted's official love interest having admitted she disliked his puns and having Rebecca laugh at one of his puns IN THE SAME EPISODE is meant to convey she's the one and right under his nose!

That her love interest for the night unloading his marital struggles on her unprompted just like Ted did, loving the same songs as Ted and making her tea that had the same impact on her as Ted's first biscuits means that what she looks for in a partner is right under her nose!

That having her bump into Ted in a corridor and both sensing each other in a choreographed dance MOMENTS after Higgins gave her a whole ass speech about how psychics could help her see in herself what she's missing means IT WAS ALWAYS TED. Don't even get me started on the fact that during said speech, the pink biscuit box was very conveniently placed just behind the green matchbook! A speech about her not seeing something about herself?? Uh??? FUCK OFF.

That Rebecca being told she will have a family and have her instigate Ted getting closer to his son and gushing over his mother is a clear indicator that she would fit in the Lasso household like a glove!

That having Ted canonically never ask for help and Rebecca being the one who doesn't need him to because she always knows when he is unwell means she's framed as being the right person for him. She also uses a trick his EX-WIFE used in the past for that exact purpose.

That their baggage matching right up meant they would have been perfect for each other. His biggest fear is being abandoned and hers is ending up alone. Ted and Rebecca were the logical option for a couple. Ted even had to begrudgingly admit it worked for Jane and Beard. The only canonically happy couple at the end (and ain't that fucking mental...).

That having the line "Remember to let her into your heart" from the Hey Jude song coincide with Ted looking down at his phone and seeing Rebecca's name means that she's the woman he should allow himself to end up with.

Why keep them both single and desperate for love until the very last episode? Why not have Michelle beg Ted to come back and Dutch Guy find Rebecca thanks to newspaper clips about football in Holland 10 episodes ago and be done with it?? Why even not have Rebecca pine for him on screen ever since they parted ways??

Everything in this show was intentional. You can't marvel over this fact for everything BUT Ted and Rebecca and suddenly claim we read too much into things! We were played. Multiple times. At various degrees. And it doesn't take being a fan of the show to see it:

An LA Times journalist made an article about the hints and clues in the show after she interviewed TedBecca fans. And she BELIEVED IT. She got convinced. She told Hannah W. in an interview.

Another journalist on CBR.com (male, so you can shove your "desperate women wanting the straight couple to be together at the end" where the sun ain't shining) lamented the way the TedBecca shippers were treated.

Keep your passive-aggressive posts to yourselves. We've been dangled a carrot since day one and just because we never got to eat it doesn't mean it was never there.

[olderthannetfic]

I think what I think is a tiny bit funny is how Greek and Norse mythology is all "up for grabs" but I highly doubt anyone would be as enthused if this happened to Poc cultures. Which is kinda dumb, because while I do love me some of those myths, you never see people ever consider Poc cultures. Outside of said places. I got recommended some African fairy tales some years ago and got a book that included myths and legends, and why not do those? Why not check the rest of the world? I don't expect Pocs to not enjoy Greek and Norse cultures anymore btw, that would also be dumb because myths are fucking fun no matter who you are. I'm just kinda a bit more interested in seeing more variety, and I don't feel like the Nth new version of some Greek or Norse myth being modernified to be that interesting regardless of who writes it. Especially when modernified is just a different way of saying we're doing a kinda cookie cutter drama romcom but everyone has ye olden mythical names.

--

People are afraid of Doing It Wrong, especially if they are white, but of course, some of the nonwhite ones who do try still manage to do offensive bullshit, so there's no way to guarantee anything. You just have to do your research, make your art, and see what people think.

(I'm thinking, for example, of that thing that claimed to be using African myths but was mixing in new world stuff really cluelessly. The author obviously felt that as African diaspora in Europe, she had the right, but...)

[cuntylittlesalmon]

I came across one of your posts criticising Delilah Green, and the radfem-esque rhetoric of Ashley Herring Blake's works. I agree, I completely despised her works. But every time one of my friends or I spoke about it, we were criticised on bookstagram and book twt. I was curious to know your thoughts on these books, if you are okay with it.

i am aaaaaaalways down to talk shit about bad books! i’ve felt completely isolated in the larger sapphic bookish spheres because i hated AHB’s work, i’m glad to have found another one of us 🫶

this’ll be under a cut because it’ll be incredibly long, as every instance of me criticizing these books has been

DGDC - delilah green doesn’t care

APDF - astrid parker doesn’t fail

AHB - ashley herring blake

SO!

these books suck. lmao. i don't think they're particularly interesting on the character-level, or the world-level, or the prose-level, or really anything at all. there are scenes here and there where i can see what AHB can do but she's too busy trying to seem like the funniest and the most progressive white cis woman out there--of course, without doing any of the actual work that comes with deconstructing the racist, transphobic, and homophobic ideology she grew up with as a person from the united states.

which leads me into my first complaint: everything to do with emery and their pronouns. every single thing in that scene felt like pandering, and the pronoun sharing aspect felt like word salad that needed to be edited down to a single sentence of "And then everyone else shared their pronouns". we're already deeply aware that every single person in this book sans emery is cis, i don't need that shoved into my face further with a cis woman expounding upon how she's terrified that she's going to fuck up somehow in sharing her own pronouns. unnecessary bullshit, since i'm guessing the point was to show that astrid is insecure, particularly around industry professionals, but with a slightly funny slant to it. this was not the place to show that, especially when there are so many other instances both before and after this part that show her anxieties better.

and frankly, in sharing this part with a friend, they thought it was astrid being insecure about getting emery's pronouns correct which....if your cute lil romcom protag can be see as an annoying and borderline transphobic cissie when they come face to face with a nonbinary person for the first time because your prose just sucks ass......maybe you shouldn't include that lol

and i think that leans in a lot to the "humor" of these books. at one point in ADPF, delilah makes a joke about fighting someone "like a lesbian", which in her eyes (and somewhat therefore AHB's eyes) means gazing disapprovingly at someone and making her mouth "look like a butthole" (paraphrasing, but not the butthole part. she really says butthole). i'm assuming this was supposed to be funny, but it fell so fucking flat with me. like, these books are supposed to be romcoms. romantic fucking comedies. but most of the humor is so deeply steeped in white millennialisms that it's actually unfunny unless you're like my gen x mother who spends 90% of her time on facebook.

which, i suppose that's my biggest gripe with the books, and with AHB herself. it's a lot of self-serving nonsense, with little to no introspection about why certain things are included versus not. i mean, i can say that about a lot of popular romance novels, but thats beside the point. there is no reckoning with institutions, despite all of the call backs to how rich people suck, or how white people suck, or how men suck. it's all so very wink-wink-nudge-nudge, "im in the know, can't you tell?", correct terminology wrong ideology kinda of stuff. ok yeah, white people as the institution suck. i think we all know that. but also, ashley, every single important character, every single side character (save a couple), and every single background character (save a couple), are all white. you are actively participating in the "white is default" ideology that you seemingly dislike and make fun of in your book. so which is it?

this disconnect between AHB's story choices (all white main cast, etc) and the prose-level choices is so fucking obvious throughout the entire body of both books:

the lesbian main characters cannot call themselves lesbians, but one will call themself dyke without a second thought.

the trans-positive lesbian main characters will talk about dating/being attracted to nonbinary people, but do not have any nonbinary friends, do not talk to any nonbinary people, and the one nonbinary character included thus far speaks one (maybe twice) just to give their pronouns.

the lesbian main characters call themselves butch (or are called so by other wlw (but not lesbian) characters) and yet are still conventionally feminine in their presentations.

men are the worst people in the world, and yet josh (an ex of claire from DGDC) is consistently trying to atone for his past harm, and within the story we're given, is like, an actually alright guy.

men are the worst people in the world, and yet the worst actions taken against iris was not by her ex-boyfriend, but by her butch girlfriend (which. i have a lot of thoughts on this).

the books say they believe one thing, but are never backed up with actually evidence that this is the case.

and so, when i say the books have some radfem-y bullshit in them, this is largely what im talking about. i have no clue if AHB herself is a radfem, or exactly what she believes in. im not combing through her twitter account because she as a person annoys me, and anyone promoting her work annoys me. but she is participating in some fucked up shit, and the fact that they are so beloved just makes my ass itch and i feel like i need to speak on it more than i already do now 💀

anyway. the radfem-y stuff.

the books use some pretty covert gender essentialism when it comes to the lesbian characters vs the bisexual woman characters. every single lesbian is said to be masculine (specifically butch) while every single bisexual woman (and every single ostensibly straight woman) is, while not called out as feminine, exclusively present femininely. which....is weird. i don't think i have to say why saving masculinity for lesbians (and men) is stereotypical, and kind of gross, especially coming from someone who isn't a lesbian.

but wait! its worse! masculinity (regardless of how prescriptive vs. descriptive it is) in these books are very much associated with emotionally unavailability and callousness toward the feminine (emotional) counterpart. and really, its even worse when you compare difference within the lesbian characters (delilah, jordan, and iris' girlfriend).

delilah and jordan, when you actually examine them, are feminine presenting. they both wear red lipstick, eyeliner "sharp enough to kill a man", and in delilah's case, heels. the most masculine aspects about them is that they don't wear skirts or dresses. literally. whereas, iris's girlfriend in APDF, who only wears suits, has short cropped hair, never wears makeup, and has a stereotypically masculine job. jordan and delilah are love interests. they're allowed to grow into emotionally available people by their love for their feminine partners. the butch girlfriend, however, is a cheating piece of shit who's entire point is to set up iris' storyline for the third book in the series (a role that could've been done just as well by her ex boyfriend, who she dated in DGDC, instead of what feels like a very pointed and spiteful subplot).

so, it becomes very clear to me that masculinity is the worst thing you can have in these books. none of the men are given grace either, and i touched on it a bit earlier talking about josh. he was flaky as hell with claire and their daughter before the events of DGDC, and so claire (and by extension, her friends iris and astrid) are wary of him when he comes back into her and her daughter's lives. but, for all of that, josh isn't flaky in the book. like he very much steps up to be a good dad to his daughter. is the best? no, obviously. i dont think AHB is capable of writing a "good" character. but he literally doesn't abandon anyone, despite us being constantly told that thats what he does, to the point that when he ends up being unreachable for a couple of days, every single character freaks out and treats him like a monster. iris fucking punches him for this, even though he actually had a good reason. and im not one to defend men like 💀 i am very much a manhater, but like. cmon. it feels entirely unearned. and its that disconnect again. AHB wants you to believe that josh deserves this because he's a man, so of course he's going to be terrible, its what men do, despite him, like, not being terrible.

(and its even worse in APDF, where astrid is literally disgusted to be in his presence point blank, period, even though hes been like. consistently a decent guy.)

and my last piece in this, is natasha rojas. the otherworldly sexy and gorgeous latina host of the reality show in APDF, who literally wears a clitoris necklace. like not only is it leaning on racist stereotyping, but she's the ultimate feminine who wears a literal piece of the vagina. yonic imagery is cool and everything (genuinely, there should be more!) but this is not only extremely heavy handed in a brick-to-the-face kind of way, but also as the Ultimate Feminine, she's this deeply warm and caring and nurturing person, who is never posited as a antagonist or anything despite her positioning as a literal corporate player for HGTV (the hallmark of home renovation. every fucking person on that network is some flavor of conservative). she very much could've been a stand in for the capitalist homogenization of the housing market that HGTV absolutely caters toward, especially when you take into consideration astrid original plan for the house that she's renovating (taking it from very classically victorian to white and grey contemporary), but instead she's positioned as a mouthpiece for the glory of the clit and female sexuality only. which is fucking frustrating. and so fucking weird.

but yeah. AHB has a very white millennial liberal queer view of gender and presentation and sexuality, which in and of itself is very essentialist. but she tries to play out of her biases as a white and cis woman by making in-narrative jokes about it, but they fall completely flat because she has no idea what she's doing, and thus perpetuates the exact same shit she's trying to make fun of. she's got a lot of unchecked bigotry rattling around in that empty brain of hers, which when you're trying to write a feminist book, leans itself to radfem & white feminist ideology (which. lbr. are the fucking same but whatever).

ik this was long as hell but ty everyone who made it to the end for reading 😤🙏💓

[minefield-of-a-ninja]

All fics are 18+ ONLY unless otherwise noted

SERIES

*at least three parts or chapters

28 Days - AU Dean Winchester x several AU SPN characters

Summary: Dean Winchester is an addict and an alcoholic, a USMC veteran, a father, and an older brother. As Battalion Chief with Lawrence Fire & Medical, Dean comes under investigation when he makes a dangerous and impulsive decision, defying his superiors and abandoning the team he is supposed to lead. He is given the choice to go to rehab for 28 days, or jail. His lawyer insists on rehab, and Dean begrudgingly abides.

Characters: Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester, Emma Winchester, Jack Kline, Victor Henriksen, Jo Harvelle, Gordon Walker, Bille, Crowley, Rowena, Missouri, Meg, Pamela, Gabriel, Lydia, Casey, Jamie, Carmen, Tessa 

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, emergency action, fire, drug use, thoughts of death and dying, teen endangerment, references to underage drug addiction and prostitution, partially told through flashbacks 

Words: 33K

Author’s notes: Inspired by the film 28 Days and following canon themes from SPN, this is a fic about Dean, a firefighter who goes to rehab, not about Dean as a firefighter.

And Then There Were Three - Winchester brothers x original female character

Summary: Natalie and Dean are in a “not serious” relationship until one night, she and Sam take a step that will change things forever.

Warnings/tags: 18+ONLY, rough sex, squirting, anal sex, butt plug, bondage, dirty talk, orgasm control, double penetration, polyamory, W*ncest adjacent

Words: 13,500

Black Tie Optional: sequel to Plus One - Dean Winchester x Vanessa (OFC)

Summary: The last time we saw Vanessa, she was swooning over Dean’s lasting impression. Now, we fast-forward a year to see what she’s up to.

Pairing: Dean Winchester x OFC Vanessa Martinelli, (eventual) Sam Winchester x OFC Emma Olsen

Warnings: 18+ ONLY, HBO RomCom bullshit

Words: 17K

Combat Baby - Dean Winchester x Jo Harvelle

Summary: canon divergent - Dean’s sweet, but Jo likes him nasty

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, rough sex, biting, dirty talk, brief name-calling, exhibitionism, role play, squirting

Words: 3,073 WORK IN PROGRESS

God Only Knows - Dean Winchester x female reader

Summary: One weekend, years ago, lives rent-free in both of their minds. Three-part mini-series.

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, pining, clothed sex, couch sex, hungover sex, fluff, roomies to lovers, idiots in love

Words: 5,500

If We Make It Through December - Dean Winchester x Donna Hanscum

Summary: Donna is horrified to learn that the boys have never had a proper Christmas, so she invites them to her house for the holiday.

Characters: Dean Winchester, Donna Hanscum, Sam Winchester, Jody Mills, Claire Novak, Kaia Nieves, Patience Turner, Alex Jones

Warnings/tags: there was no rebar, 18+ ONLY, fluff, light angst, domesticity, holiday celebrations

Words: 12K

The Kinda Girl You Like - Winchester brothers x original female character

Summary: After Sam reveals to Sofie his sub that he likes to watch, she decides that they should act on it. Then he tells her what exactly it is that he likes to watch…

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, sub-sharing, bondage, rimming, the jockey is my favorite sex position, dirty talk, W*ncest adjacent

Words: 6,500

Leaving Heaven - Dean Winchester x Taziana Smith (OFC)

Summary: Tazi is a bounty hunter of mostly human things. She isn’t firmly seated in the supernatural world, but she’s familiar enough that she’s recruited by an old friend of John Winchester’s to capture and deliver a brief acquaintance of her own.

Characters: MOC/Knight of Hell/Demon Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester, Crowley, Lee Webb, original characters

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, this is not your mother’s Dean Winchester, brief dub-con, mentions of the foster system, references to past rape, commiserating over childhood trauma, threats of sexual violence

Words: 16,500 WORK IN PROGRESS

The Mud On Your Boots - Dean Winchester x Donna Hanscum 

Summary: Dean and Donna finally give in.

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, dirty talk, fluff, consent is sexy, period sex, fisting, blood as lube, shower sex

Words: 8k (permanent hiatus)

Plus One - Dean Winchester x Vanessa (OFC)

Summary: Vanessa hates weddings until she meets a handsome stranger who agrees to help her mix things up for the night.

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, fingery things, squirting, and Dean has no refractory period bc this is fic

Words: 9,600

Pretty Reckless - MOC Dean Winchester x pre-slayer Faith Lehane

Summary: AU where s10 Dean stumbles upon another hunter so much like himself. When their connection grows inexplicably stronger, they find an answer they never thought existed.

Characters: Dean Winchester, Faith Lehane, Sam Winchester, Castiel, Crowley, Cain

Warnings/tags: 19+, rough sex, prostate massage, magical bond

Words: 15K

Run Me Like A River - AU Dean Winchester x AU Jessica Jones

Summary: AU wherein Jessica Jones is super-powered by gov’t experiments to create elite soldiers, the Winchesters are military officers in humanity’s War Against Evil, and they have all gone AWOL from their assigned roles. Dean and Jess embark on a relationship that ends abruptly and explosively until Dean calls her for help on a very personal case.

Characters: Jessica Jones, Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester, Arthur Ketch, Malcolm is Jess’s cat 

Warnings: 18+ ONLY, this is not your mother’s Dean Winchester, major character death, unhealthy relationship dynamics, bondage, rough sex, anal sex, ptsd

Words: 14K

Seasons - Dean Winchester x unnamed female character

Summary: She is his safe haven, untouched by anything else or anyone. 

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, canon divergent - no Cassie or Lisa, non-linear storytelling, four seasons, angst, hurt/comfort, references non-con unprotected sex, loss of a pregnancy

Words: 12K

Temporary Scars - Dean Winchester x Donna Hanscum x Benny Lafitte

Warnings/tags: 18+, Angst, Donna has intimacy issues, Dean’s the sweetest, self-sabotage, sort of established relationship, Benny’s swoony as fuck, Dean’s in love, polyamory, pregnancy kink

Words: 4,500 (permanent hiatus)

Unopened At Your Feet - AU Sam Winchester x female narrator, AU Dean Winchester x female narrator

Summary: This is the story of how I broke my own heart.

Characters: Female Narrator, Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester, Becky Rosen, Meg Masters, Benny Lafitte

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, weed-smoking, canon-compliant date-rape/roofie (Becky), love triangle

Words: 12,470 WORK IN PROGRESS

Where Is My Shiny Gun? -  Dean Winchester x Donna Hanscum (voyeur Sam Winchester)

Summary: canon divergent - Sam finds himself in a quandary when he realizes he has feelings for Donna by way of the obvious mutual attraction between her and Dean.

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, Sam is kinky, Dean is adorable, so is Donna, Dean likes to give Donna massages, Sam directing while masturbating, brief spanking + breast slapping, brief knife play - no blood, W*ncest adjacent

Word Count: 7,800

ONE-SHOTS

A Fight For Love & Glory - Winchesters x you (female)

Summary: You’re struck by sex pollen, so Sam and Dean agree to help you out.

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, sex pollen, feelings of guilt, ass play, dirty talk, W*ncest adjacent

Words: 2K

Bad Girls Underneath -  Ruby 2.0 x Dean Winchester x Jo Harvelle

Summary: Ruby and Jojo get hit by a sex curse again; this time, they need Dean’s help.

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, magical-dick/male-gaze bullshit, probably too much commentary and emotional complication, why am I like this, I’m sorry, sometimes I can’t help myself, fisting, brief choking

Words: 2,600

Cactus - Dean Winchester x Meg Masters x Castiel

Summary: Post-battle, exhausted and wanting, Dean and Meg and Cas take care of each other.

Warnings/Tags: 18+ ONLY, dreamlike sex, a little choking, Dean’s always hungry

Words: 3,200

Caveat Emptor - Dean Winchester x original female character

Summary: Gabriela Cruz invests in a Victorian mansion in the middle of America where the rule of Buyer Beware is absolute. When her twin sister goes missing, a couple of federal agents show up. Lucky for Gabi, Dean and Sam Winchester are on the case.

Characters: Gabriela Cruz, Camila Cruz, Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester, Ed Zeddmore, Harry Spangler

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, language, mentions death of family members, cursed object, mentions of blood + gore, sarcasm, twin dynamics, explicit sex

Words: 4,600

Crazy On You – Dean Winchester x female reader

Summary: You’ve had a shitty day, but this beautiful, unfamiliar boy will make it all better.

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, Impala Sex, there’s a knife but not in a bloody way

Words: 4K

Crossroads and Bound - Dean Winchester x female demon reader

Summary: He agreed to this.

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, femdom, Dean’s tied to a chair, wearing a cock ring, face sitting, things might get a little rough, but it’s all in good fun, squirting

Words: 2,250

The Curve Of Your Pretty Gown - Dean Winchester x female reader

Request: Hey hon! Ok, so it’s my birthday today, so maybe a story about Dean surprising me/ the reader by turning up unannounced to wish me/the reader a ‘happy birthday’ and there’s lots of smut ❤️

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, a little angst

Words: 2,200

Deep - Dean Winchester x female reader

Summary: Dean shows you more about pleasure than ‘deep’.

Warnings: 18+ ONLY, Dean being perfect, sensual massage, Dean being the best lay ever, biting, Dean being a fairytale prince, the jockey is my favorite sexual position, try it, it’s amazing, talking during sex, gratuitous use of terms of endearment bc it’s Dean

Words: 3K

Discord and Rhyme - Knight of Hell/Demon Dean x female reader

Summary: He’s on the prowl.

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, this is not your mother’s Dean Winchester, rough anal sex, crying during sex, blood during sex, there’s a lot of purple prose and excessive descriptions of taste and smell here, sexual coercion, dirty talk

Words: 1,750

Ennui - Knight of Hell/Demon Dean x unnamed female character

Anonymous Prompt: “I really want demon dean stalking someone but I don’t know how to do that with consent? But guh just the thought of him.

Characters: Knight of Hell/Demon Dean Winchester x unnamed female character

Tags/warnings: 18+ only; this is not your mother’s Dean Winchester; stalking; exhibitionism; voyeurism; dirty talk; horny on aisle 3; fuck it, we ball

Words: 2,400

Equilibrium - Dean Winchester x female reader

Summary: They have balance.

Warnings: 18+ ONLY, established relationship, cock warming

Words: 1,400

Get Down, Make Love - Winchester brothers x original female character

Summary: Steph decides to cut loose and push the envelope with her favorite fellow hunters.

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, hot tubbing, drunk sex (consensual), dirty talk, mfm spitroast, W*ncest adjacent

Words: 3,200

Hark and Hush - Purgatory Dean x wolf spirit in a female body

Summary: This is the story of how Dean Winchester hunted, became enamored with, and slew the ancient spirit of the Big Bad Wolf.

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, this is not your mother’s Dean Winchester, stalking, blood, gore, rough sex, character death

Words: 2,200

Hide Your Love Away – Dean Winchester x female hunter reader

Summary: Mutual hunters seek comfort for a night and a lifetime of memories.

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, ass play

Words: 3,600

His Sword - Michael/Dean x female prostitute

Summary: Michael takes some time to remind Dean who’s in control.

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, edge play, bondage, knife play, blood play, choking, rough sex, name-calling, character death

Words: 2,300

Just My Imagination - Dean Winchester x female Zanna

Summary: After Mary leaves the boys a second time, Dean needs a reset, or to blow off some steam – something. He heads out on a snowy evening the night before Christmas and finds just the right thing.

Warnings/tags: mature, Hallmark channel fuckery

Words: 2,800

One Night Only (23 in 1) - Dean Winchester x Mila (original female character)

Summary: While on a job in the middle of America, Dean enjoys a rigorous night of mutual gratification with a local art student.

Warnings: 18+ ONLY, ass play, shower sex, dirty talk

Words: 5,500

River - Dean Winchester x Ty (Original male character), Dean x Benny implied

Summary: It’s Dean’s first winter after sending Benny back to Purgatory.

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, implied underage prostitution, semi-public sex

Words: 1,600

Rules Are Rules - MOC Dean Winchester x female reader

Summary: Dean hasn’t been himself lately. The Mark has seen to that.

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, hand around the throat, rough sex, squirting

Words: 2,400

Shattered Like A Stone - Demon Dean Winchester x original female character

Summary: The Mark is demanding, and the demon in Dean can’t deny it any more than he can deny her; it just might get everything it wants tonight.

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, this is not your mother’s Dean Winchester, rough sex, bondage, multiple object insertion, suicidal ideation, darkfic, self-destruction, bloody sex, sadism and masochism, anal sex, Jameson as lube, spit as lube, face fucking, Daddy as title, misogynist language, choking, strangulation, assisted suicide

Words: 6,800

Some Stranger’s Hand - 2009 Dean Winchester x 2014 Risa (The End)

Summary: He lost everything.

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, plush pink pillow lips for my Eloise

Words: 1,700

Spark, Flicker, Blaze - Dean Winchester x female reader

Summary: Somewhere along the line, her life became something she didn’t like. On her 35th birthday, she makes a decision to change all of that.

Warnings: 18+ ONLY, overly descriptive orgasms, Dean’s the best birthday present ever

Words: 2,200

Stuff & Thangs That Are Awesome… And Not Awesome - Dean Winchester x female character (1st person POV)

*TWD Crossover

Prompt(s): 1) Dean has been arrested twice for indecent exposure – once was in a grocery store. 2) Jensen or Dean x Reader, a small public place, he pins you to the wall, covers your mouth and fucks you. 

Characters: Dean Winchester, Bobby Singer, Rick Grimes, Shane Walsh

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, Rick Grimes eye-fucking, Shane Walsh having a pissing contest with a young, cocky Dean Winchester

Words: 1,300

Supernova - MOC Dean Winchester x female reader

Summary: Since Dean’s had the Mark and the Blade, he’s pulled away from you, afraid of hurting you. You miss him, and you’ve had it. One night you push him to the edge.

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, bondage, blood play, biting, bruising, knifeplay, rough sex, dubcon/mindfuck

Words: 2,500

Triptych - Dean Winchester x bisexual female couple

Summary: Dean’s on a case and meets two beautiful women. One of them is recently divorced, and the new couple invites Dean to help them kick off their new life together.

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, sex toy, Dean’s real good at sex

Words: 4,700

Wait Till My Brother Gets Home - Winchester brothers x female reader

Summary: She wants to lose control.

Warnings/tags: 18+ Only, rough sex, hair pulling, mfm spit roast, bruising and chafing during sex, W*ncest adjacent

Words: 2,450

When We Fall Then We’ll Know Each Other - Dean Winchester x Benny Lafitte (voyeur Castiel)

Prompt: “There’s nothing wrong with women, but a woman can’t hold you down and fuck you like I can.” 

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, cum and spit as lube, anal sex, voyeurism

Words: 1,400

QUICK AND DIRTY

*1K words or less

Barbed Wire Carnival - Choose your own Winchester

Summary: Absence of feeling.

Warnings/tags: mature, angst, dark descriptions

Words: 300

Brimstone - Dean Winchester x female reader

Summary: He’s exactly what she wants.

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY surprise, bitch

Words: 450

Bring It On Home - Dean Winchester x female reader

Summary: Let’s pretend Dean wouldn’t be terrified to welcome love into his life.

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, established relationship, comfort, fluff, handsy Dean

Words: 1K

Communion - Dean Winchester x female reader

prompt: Fluffy dean or Jensen smoking weed plz, ty

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, marijuana use

Words: 1K

Crash Through The Surface - Dean Winchester x Jasen (original male character)

Summary: Dean remembers his First.

Warnings/tags: mature, bi-sexual Dean, references to prostitution

Words: 800

Custard Pie - Dean Winchester x female reader

Prompt: Dean/OFC based on Led Zeppelin’s ‘Custard Pie.’

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY oral sex

Words: 800

Drag You To The Shore - Dean Winchester x GN reader

Prompt: Dean Winchester settled in between someone’s legs on the bed. Like his back to their chest, their legs wrapped around him, heels keeping his thighs open while they jerk him off, explicit but soft vibes.

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY

Words: 800

Fall Away Into - Dean Winchester x Ruby 2.0 x female reader (voyeur Sam Winchester)

Prompt: “Dean x reader x Ruby 2.0 with Sam watching from the corner.”

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY drug-induced sex, OOC Dean, mff spit roast, use of the word bitch during sex, rough sex, hate sex, W*ncest adjacent

Words: 530

Foxholes - Annie Hawkins x Bobby Singer/Dean Winchester/Sam Winchester

Summary: Annie recalls time spent with each man and what their facial hair told her about them.

Warnings/tags: mature language and references to sexual activity

Words: 349

The Gazelle - AU Dean Winchester x AU Benny Lafitte x female reader

Summary: They aim to please.

Warnings/tags: mature, power exchange, Denny apparent

Words: 1K

The Good Slayer - Dean Winchester x Faith Lehane

Prompt: Dean and our girl Faith. (This is a sequel of sorts for Pretty Reckless.)

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, talking during sex

Words: 800

Hollow - MOC Dean Winchester x female reader

prompt: Would anyone be willing to write something with Dean [or Jensen] x reader to the song Love on the Brain by Rihanna

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, dirty talk, rough sex, angst

Words: 1K

I’ll Keep Them Still - Dean Winchester x Jo Harvelle

Summary: Dean remembers promises and pictures in his mind. And he remembers her.

Warnings/tags: mature, songfic, angst, dream/afterlife sequences, purple prose, I’m sorry

Words: 1K

Just One More Peaceful Day - MOC Dean Winchester x female reader

Prompt: angsty Dean with the line “I can still remember just the way you taste” from the song “It’s been a while” by Staind

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, blood play, knife play, mentions of addiction

Words: 700

Laissez Les Bons Temp Rouler -  Dean Winchester x female reader

Summary: He’s got a dirty mouth when he’s drunk. 

Warnings: 18+ ONLY, dirty talk, a dirty public bathroom during Mardi Gras

Words: 600

Lifting the Veil - Choose Your Own Winchester

Summary: You’ve been missing something of paramount importance - until now.

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, infidelity, squirting

Words: 1K

Mind Blown - Dean Winchester x female reader

Summary: Mind-blowing orgasms can sometimes be literal.

Warnings/tags: mature, transient global amnesia after sex, dirty talk

Words: 560

Nihilism - Knight of Hell/Demon Dean x female reader

Prompt: Can you tell me about the morning after going several rounds with Dean he rolls over in bed and adjusts the covers, causing you to forget your shift to be his good girl a couple more times?

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, this is not your mother's Dean Winchester, name-calling, rough sex, nihilistic themes, Knight of Hell Dean, fantasies of being fucked to death? Idk it’s one of mine, might as well be yours, you’re female AFAB in this scenario

Words: 800

One For Tomorrow, One Just For Today - Dean Winchester x female reader

Prompt: before leaving on a hunt, Dean sings “Love Me Two Times” to his lady.

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLT, Dean can actually sing, and he does it during sex

Words: 660

The Prerogative To Have A Little Fun - Donna Hanscum x Jody Mills x Winchester brothers (kinda)

Prompt: Donna’s visiting Jody for the weekend and the boys swing by on their way home from a hunt. Dean mows the lawn, Sam fixes a leaky shower head, Dean makes dinner, and they both do the dishes. Meanwhile, the ladies sit back and enjoy the domestic display.

Warnings/tags: mature, men doing manly things, inspired by Shania Twain’s song “Man! I Feel Like A Woman”, W*ncest adjacent

Words: 1K

Recompense - Dean Winchester x female reader

Summary: Dean is sorry for hurting the ones he loves.

Warnings/tags: mature, angst, Dean saying hurtful things then trying to make up for it

Words: 500

Scream - Dean Winchester x past-female reader

Summary: Dean tells us the real reason he loves “All Saint’s Day” as much as he does.

Warnings/tags: mature, references to coming untouched, getting turned on by scary movies

Words: 320

Soft Cell - Dean Winchester + teenage female

Prompt: Dean + reader dancing in the bunker

Warnings/tags: one F-bomb bc Dean

Words: 720

Through The White Night - AU Dean Winchester x original female character

Summary: 18th Century matrimony isn’t as simple as it is today.

Warnings/tags: mentions of wall sex and finger-y things

Words: 560

Wish - Dean Winchester x female reader

Summary: You want it to be love – but it isn’t. You want him – but you can’t have him. 

Warnings/tags: mature, sepia-toned angst ™ @boondoctorwho

Words: 765

With Pleasured Hands - Dean Winchester x female reader

Summary: He’s got secrets she has yet to uncover

Warnings/tags: mature

Words: 500

[wutheringmights]

<shakily rolling into your inbox> Would you gift us with chapter commentary, please?

Your wish is my command:

Framing the past section around headlines was not my original plan. I wanted to do a repeating refrain of "This is how the war ended," but when it came time to actually write it, I was bored with it. Yeah, kinda thought about it too hard. So I went back to the drawing board.

I also considered framing the chapter around the passing seasons, but that seemed too boring. I wanted something with a bit more pizazz.

Plus, one of my favorite genres of fan work is in-universe media like newspapers and magazine covers. This is a pretty weak attempt at it, but at least I threw my hat into the ring.

I've been trying for a while now to imply that the original HW storyline is what was spread as propaganda to the people of Hyrule, but this is the first time I made it really, really clear.

So the engineer being assigned to the coast is a reference to how the DLC that features Toon Link is the one where there's suddenly an ocean. Very smooth of me lol

This chapter ended up being a bit of a dumping ground for all of the relationships I was ignoring in favor of writing about the brothers, ironically because I too was too consumed with the engineer and the child to write about anything else, which in turn really drove home how all-consuming their presence was for Link

The fun thing about Midna's scene is that her and Link going on nightly walks together was one of the very first ideas I had for CTB by virtue of it being inherited from when I thought I was going to write a romcom. Incredible that it took half a million words to finally get to it.

My favorite part of the past is the bit where Link writes all of the letters to the engineer. It's just a lot of fun to sit there and figure out what kind of bullshit he would spout to kinda apologize but not really. It was even more fun to punch him back down with Lincoln's brutal response. Just rereading it, I feel like you can tell I was having a blast.

I also had a lot of fun finding ways to show symptoms of Link's alcoholism getting worse without him realizing it. The constant headaches, the nausea, the shakey hands, the sensory sensitivity-- him experiencing all of this and going so deep into denial that he can't understand why his body is reacting that way.

It's been so long since I've managed to give Toto some screen time that I kinda forgot how much I like his character? He's just a guy, but I like that he's just a guy. But I don't think I made it too clear in the chapter that in their friend group, they were the least friends with each other. Link was closer to Anders, and Toto to Uri. They're being driven together by virtue of being the only ones left, moreso than I initially conveyed.

And, of course, I got to talk about Uri again. Again, Uri is always so interesting to handle because he is a character who we will never see in person and Link is too traumatized by the death of to think about in detail. Even now, Uri feels like a mystery. All we know about him is how Link feels about him.

And finally, Zelda. The thing about Zelda is that I feel like her goals are really transparent, but I always get comments from people who want there to be this moment where everything about her is spelled out. And, despite the fact that she monologues about her feelings here, I don't think this is exactly what everyone was hoping for. The more I read it over, I can see how she probably just got more confusing.

Also, I know I need to stop writing monologues. But have you considered that the monologues are sexy?

I feel like I should say something about how Zelda's relationship with Hylia, but it really speaks for itself. I will say that as much as I like how BOTW is so ambiguous with Hylia, I am a little bit more fascinated with the idea that "your god is real and they specifically hate you." Like, how are you supposed to cope with that? We should all be thankful Zelda isn't more fucked up than she is.

I should also say something about her thoughts on the engineer... so first, my goal with that relationship was always for it to be toxic from both ends, with the engineer trying to use her while she uses him-- which gets even more complicated when you consider all the ways Zelda echoes Link. Like Link, she sees parts of herself in the engineer. Unlike him, she wants to save be saved, so she in turn saves him. Link hates himself so much that he has to drag everyone else down with him.

In the era of everyone wanting Zelda to no longer be a damsel in distress, it's kind fun to give her the traditional goal of being saved by someone else, to then twist it around. She is begging to be rescued, but she won't fix anything herself.

This idea really goes against the popular depictions of HW Zelda, which is why I have iterated before that this Zelda is not Artemis. She's her own thing.

There was going to be more about how the war ended, but I decided to keep it for next chapter because (you guessed it) the word count got too long.

On to the present--

Congrats to everyone who said they wanted to see more of Spirit and Warriors talking shop. You really won with this chapter.

That being said, I always think that I never write what people want when they want it. Like I will write a chapter with a lot of action, so everyone says they want more action next. But then I follow it up with a chapter of people just talking, so I get a lot of people requesting more of that. But then, it's back to heavy action.

All that's to say that I feel bad that there wasn't more character drama this chapter

Also, I feel really bad for not including either Hyrule or Wind in this chapter. Those two are the characters people ask me to write more about the most. But unfortunately, the thing about juggling a large cast of characters is that some times you have to sit down and get a few of those characters out of the way for a bit so that we can focus on other things.

I don't want to make it sound like I was targeting those two on purpose. They just had the best excuse for not going on the Nephus mission.

Speaking of which, I feel terrible for constantly finding ways to leave Lana and Linkle out of the action-- and that's after I've talked so much about adding more women into the story to balance out the default nine dudes LU requires me to add. But again, there are so many characters that I have to find ways to leave some of them behind. And again, it was really easy to give them an excuse to not be in the main action. But It's probably a bad thing that they are easily excused. I should work on that.

And I know I can write scenes with a shit ton of characters talking together. I've done it plenty of times in CTB and other ensemble stories before it. But it's a lot of work, and when I need to focus on more important plot points, the last thing I want to juggle is balancing every scene so that everyone has something to do.

Sorry to belabor that point. Sometimes, I get really annoyed with how big the cast it when it's not even my fault.

It is my fault. I just want to complain.

I appreciate everyone who has their own version of Spirit going on more legendary adventures while he is wearing his OSHA mandated work uniform. I know the Heroes of Hyrule are not unionized, but I at least would like to make sure he is properly dressed with an adventure.

That being said, his Castle Guard uniform was partially inspired by the uniform for the Free Planets Alliance in the original Legend of the Galactic Heroes:

That is not a great photo, but I was envisioning something like this-- "this" being a more modern cut with clear nautical influences (cause the Castle Guard was probably originally a navy)

Also the crest on Spirit's uniform is Tetra's pirate emblem. Do not get be started about how I fucked up the crest of the New Hyrulean royal family back in chapter 6 and how I have been looking for some band-aid to place over that mistake so that it would look like I did it on purpose

I didn't expect the scene where Spirit talks to Four to be so polarizing. I didn't even think it was a significant moment when I wrote it. Yet I've seen a huge gambit of reactions, from people calling Spirit cruel or others saying that the moment was sweet. That being said, I am living for this. If there is one thing I want right now, it is for everyone's opinion on Spirit to be split.

Did you guys enjoy me trying to write about how machinery works? Honestly, I could have probably cut all that, but I did so much work establishing the mechanics behind the ganons in previous chapters that I felt like I had to go through with it.

My original plan was for Warriors's plan to involve taking Philo hostage from the start, but I changed it because writing a kidnapping scene would have been too much work. It still really bugs me. The way the chapter is written now feels really cheap, but again. I didn't feel like I had enough space.

I also ran into the fun problem of wanting to show the nuances of Philo and Icarius's relationship when one can't speak and the other would not speak Hylian. Legend saved my ass a bit with this one, but I don't know if all of the little details got through.

Speaking of which, I should talking the House of Nephus

So obviously, I wanted the House of Nephus to reflect the original brothers dynamic. The idea is that they are what Warriors, Spirit, and Time/Mask would turn into if both Spirit and Mask stayed.

Except, in practice, I had to give them their own distinct personalities so that they wouldn't be boring as fuck

Icarius and Philo got away with getting small but really effective changes. They both still feel like reflections of Spirit and Time respectively

But Nephus.... so my original personality for him was someone as jaded and mean as Warriors is at his worst. But he felt too much like Zelda or Impa. So I went back to the drawing board to find some character angle that would be really interesting and effective for how little screen time he will ultimately get.

My inspiration came from the Virginia Woolf seminar I was in when I first started working on CTB. I was thinking a lot about rich, British assholes; very specifically about the kind who are self-prescribed intellectuals who fetishize non-white cultures while maintaining the superiority of Western imperialism.

So with that in hand, I got rid jadedness and turned Nephus into a guy dripping with charisma but is unaware of how terrible of a person he is. And as a reflection of Warriors, he works thematically.

But you can make the argument that this is not the story for this kind of a character, especially when I have already gone through such lengths to clarify that Hyrule is an imperialist nation that echoes America. You can see me poking fun at it in some of the dialogue during this scene, but still.

(And it gets worse when you look at the subtext of how light vs dark magic is treated between Hyrule and Faovaria).

So, yeah. I deserve some criticism for this one. I know it. But I didn't change it because I just liked how immediately interesting Nephus was. I couldn't think of an alternative that would have been as effective as this affable evil. Sorry about that.

Another idea I had was that Nephus was going to be the Faovarian equivalent of the Hero of Hyrule, and he would even have his own dual blades of dark and light magic to prove it. I ended up not doing this because it was too heavy handed.

I originally was going to keep the swords, and I even realized that if I had planned things out a bit better, the dark magic sword could have been Ghirahim. I decided that it would have been too out of left field to have worked, but man. I have regretted since day 1 that I cut Ghirahim from the story. I'm sorry, Ghirahim.

And then I didn't even include the swords. Motherfucker.

That actually was a genuine mistake on my part, because the point of the swords would have been to give Nephus's speech on his religion more credence. We as the audience know that the goddesses exist. And yet... why does there seem to be more to the gods of this universe? Are Hylia and the Golden Three really just oracles? If Nephus has these cool swords, what other powers and weapons does Faovaria have within its borders? You know, just world building stuff.

I came up with too much story for the House of Nephus than what I will ultimately have space to include in CTB. I'll try to strategic so that you won't be annoyed with the lack of answers from some of the questions you probably have.

As important as Nephus is, he's ultimately not the main antagonist of the story. If I was willing to write 20 more chapters, I could do a lot more with him, Philo, and Icarius; but I would like to see the end of CTB someday lol

Originally, only Time, Spirit, and Midna were going to go with Warriors to meet Nephus. There was definitely going to be this bit where Spirit and Warriors were going to be like "oh fuck, he's hot" as Nephus flirted with them. Meanwhile, Time (a married man) would be sitting there like "really??? both of you have horrible taste??"

I am also realizing I forgot to write a moment where Warriors is horrified to realize that Nephus was going to make Philo sit there in pain instead of rushing him to a doctor. Fucking hell.

Also, that Nephus's spirit feels normal to Spirit is important. Not on a plot level, but thematically. Just hang on to that thought next time you think about the whole spirit sensing thing.

I always knew that CTB was going to evolve into a Triforce quest story. There's no way I could write about a guy who's supposed to be this brutal strategist and not let him realize he has an easy solve to everything. But I also didn't want this to be easy or feel cheap. It's why I went through all that effort to establish that getting those pieces would involving going up against the Royal Family and the Knights of Hyrule. It's going to be hard, and it will involve all the fighting and manipulating you expect CTB to have. It'll also involve moral dilemmas.

After all, we've been talking about the moral dilemmas presented by the Triforce since at least chapter 6 (remember when I said that there was so much set-up in that chapter for stuff that was for far later in the story? Hello, pay off!)

All that's to say that I am worried that people don't like this direction. I have gotten a few comments about how excited people are for Warriors's plan, but only time will tell if this ruined the story for some people.

And I know I worry a lot about ruining CTB. That's not a problem that's going to be solved any time soon, so let me have this one.

Finally, the chapter was going to go until Time's talk with Warriors. Decided to move it to next chapter because, you guessed it, space.

[sochilll]

Day One of Pins and Patches Week! (See the prompt list here!)

Day One: Crushes/Gaze

Read on Ao3

Michael was not pathetic. He was actually very cool. But cool in an “I don’t actually care about being cool” kinda way. He was above lowly concepts like “popularity.”

That’s why it was so annoying that Jake Dillinger really was that hot. And that Michael couldn’t stop staring at him in English. Him and his stupid smile and his stupid dimple and his stupid-

The bell rang, startling him out of his daze. He started shoving stuff into his backpack. 

“Can you just admit you like him?” Jeremy sighed, leaning on Michael’s desk.

“To whom are you referring?” Michael asked innocently. 

They fell into step as they joined the hallway stream. Jeremy elbowed him.

“It’s obvious. Like, really obvious.”

“I’m thinking pizza for lunch today.”

“Michael,” Jeremy yanked him to a halt just outside the cafeteria. “It’s not a big deal. Everyone has a crush on Jake.”

“Well I do not. I’m not obsessed with these dumb social hierarchies like some people.”

Jeremy snorted. “Yeah fuckin’ right,” he mumbled, pulling the cafeteria door open.

Michael held his ground. He was not going to admit to being a glasses-wearing loser who had a crush on the varsity basketball star because that was stupid and cliche and life was not an 80s romcom. 

The next day was Friday and Michael was considering leaving at lunch. His last two periods were photography and econ. He was passing econ easily and photography was a bullshit class anyway. The teacher gave them vague assignments and spent the whole period with his eyes glued to his computer. Michael would be fine. 

He’d survived math and bio and psychology. Now he just had to get through English. He was currently surviving by playing hangman with Jeremy.

He was puzzling over Jeremy’s five letter word with no a’s s’s or m’s when Jeremy suddenly elbowed him sharply. 

Michael looked up. The slide show projected onto the board said “Group Presentation Partners.” Michael ran his eyes down the list. He caught on “Heere” next to “Duke” and groaned internally. He kept reading.

“Holy shit,” Jeremy whispered. 

“No.”

“Holy fucking shit.” Jeremy was practically cackling now. 

“No. No. Absolutely fucking not,” Michael hissed. 

“Why’s it such a big deal? I thought you didn’t even like him,” Jeremy teased.

Jake Dillinger stood up, scanning the room. “Who the fuck is Mell?”

Michael slid down in his seat. Jeremy, shedding his social anxiety for the sake of humiliating his best friend, raised his hand and pointed at Michael. 

“Sick.” Jake sat back down, apparently assuming Michael would come to him. 

“Have fuuuun,” Jeremy sang, shoving Michael out of his chair. 

Michael gathered his things as slowly as he could and then dropped into the chair across from Jake. “Uh, hi.”

“Hey.” Jake nodded but didn’t look up from his phone. 

Michael was about to suggest they start brainstorming when Jake glanced at the board which now had the instructions up and said, “I’ll do the summary, you can do the critique, and we split the literary devices?”

Michael blinked. “Um, yeah. Sure.”

“Cool,” Jake jotted something on a piece of notebook paper and ripped it out sloppily. He passed it to Michael and stood up. “See you.”

Michael watched Jake go over to Rich’s table. 

Jeremy slid into his vacant seat. “What’s that?”

“Project notes.” Michael shoved the note into his pocket. “Shouldn’t you be with your partner?”

“She’s already assigned me my homework. She pulled her laptop out and put headphones on. I don’t think she wants company. What’s the note say?”

“I told you, it’s about the project.”

“I saw numbers.”

“It’s a list.”

“Horizontal numbers,” Jeremy insisted. 

Michael huffed and pulled the paper out and read Jake’s messy scrawl. 

M: Critique, lit dev. 1-3,

D: Summary, lit dev. 4-6 

Underneath their assignments, he’d written his phone number. 

Jeremy nodded seriously. “So he wants you to call him.”

“That’s not what it means.” Michael shoved the paper back into his pocket. 

He wasn’t planning to call, obviously. The project was pretty straight forward. The sections all stood on their own, so there was really no need for them to actually work together. Except, they needed something to actually present. A slideshow or a poster or something. And they hadn’t discussed that. So, they needed to figure that out. 

Michael’s finger hovered over the call button. He hesitated. What if Jake didn’t answer? What if he did? 

“Hello?”

“Hi,” Michael was sort of surprised. “Um, it’s Michael.”

“Oh, yeah, what’s up?”

“Um, we need to make a slideshow. Or something. For the project?”

There was a lot of talking in the background as Jake thought about that. 

“Yeah. How bout we meet somewhere for lunch tomorrow and figure it out? Bring whatever you’ve done so far, yeah?”

“Yeah. Okay. Sure.”

“Cool. See ya.” Jake hung up without waiting for a reply. 

Michael showed up to the cafe Jake had texted him about. It seemed like one of those places that would charge him way too much for a single drink, but he pulled the door open anyway. He scanned the small seating area and spotted Jake immediately. There were only two other people there. Michael skipped the order counter and made his way over to the other seat. 

Jake looked up. “Hey.”

“Hey.”

“I made a slide show thing.” Jake flipped his laptop around. He’d selected a basic premade template and written the topic on each slide. 

Michael inwardly grimaced at his color scheme. “Are we… attached to that? Design wise?”

Jake looked at the screen, confused. “Uh, no?”

“Okay good.” Michael pulled the laptop toward him and started digging around the Google Slides settings. He found a better template and changed the colors, opting for earth tones instead of the garish orange Jake had been using. 

Jake was craning his neck, trying to see the screen.

Michael finished and returned the laptop to him. 

“Whoa, that looks way better.” Jake looked up at him. “How’d you do that?”

“Gay magic,” Michael said without thinking. His face went red. “Um, sorry. That was a bad joke.”

Jake just snorted, already directing his attention back to the slides. They worked for a while longer, even though, once Jake had emailed Michael the link, there was no real need for them to be in the same place. Mostly, they worked in silence. But every once in a while a question would come up and they’d chat for a few minutes, usually getting mildly off topic, before slipping into silence again. 

Michael’s phone buzzed and he was surprised to see it had already been two and a half hours. He hastily started shoving his stuff into his backpack. 

“Sorry, totally lost track of time,” he muttered. “I gotta get home.”

“Okay.” Jake leaned back in his chair, stretching his arms above his head. “I should probably get back too.” He looked at Michael. “Free tomorrow? We could probably finish in a couple hours.”

Michael faltered, frozen in his tracks. “I-uh- yeah? If you wanna meet up. I just thought-I mean yeah. I’m free.”

Jake gave him a weird look. “That sounded like a lie.”

“Not a lie,” Michael shook his head. “I just didn’t think you’d wanna actually meet up again if we didn’t have to?”

“Why not?” Jake shrugged. “You’re cool. Plus I hate being home.” He stood and grabbed his backpack, sliding his laptop inside. “Same time tomorrow.” He walked out.

Michael stood there, staring after him. There was probably something worth investigating about that “I hate being home comment,” but Michael couldn’t think about that right now. Because Jake Dillinger had just called him cool. 

[mrs-stardustt]

dating Amado Carrillo Fuentes (1/?)

a/n: back up on my bullshit, back up on the scene

you don't knowwww how bad I am down for this man, like, just look at him babe

so, you guess it, i had to start this series with my tontín. i have no idea with whom of the other characters go next sooo if you have some suggestion don’t be shy and let me know, alright?

hope you enjoy this one,

 have fun indulging my delusions babesss

TW: NSFW (18+), implied fem reader

gif credit: @nomoregoldfish​ 

god this mannnn

first and foremost, how lucky are you to be dating this don juán???

we all know that he had his fun whilst single, he was for and by the streets babe

but once he met you oh boyyyyy

he strikes me as a love of first sight kinda man, just like not in a romcom way, more in the I met you and I know you're my person<3 right away

but to add a bit of spice: enemies to lovers with Amado????? OMG don't get me started

just imagine how he would pick at you just to see you all pissed off at him

and you being just as petty as he is, making each other annoyed as quickly as posible

however sooner of later maybe you two realise that you have more in common than you thought, perhaps you'll see that he is really no tontín and actually is a very intelligent man, someone who is deeply observing and attentive

he sees that too, and probably sooner than you: he always knew how fucking hermosa you are, that your smarter than you give yourself credit for, that you have a strong will and a soft heart

and I don't make the rules (I kinda do) but he falls in first

yep you heard that right, he is head over heels babe

my man would make a fool of himself E V E R Y T I M E but you gotta love him for that

he really strikes me at the type to be buying a ring just as soon as he knows you’re the one, he’ll be en las nubes, con la cabecita en el cielo (kinda on brand lol) imagining you being his wife, having kids, a house and all:(( 

buuuuuut, he’s no intenso

he'll give you space, he won't act on anything if he doesn't believe that you feel the same way

he will most likely embarrassed himself at some point tho

just let’s bffr if anything, Amado is a chill man, let’s not forget that. he is cool and so sure of himself BUT if he slightly feels threatened by anyone???? OMG RUNNN

possessive amado enters the chat

as soon as he sees some type of competition (even if you don't even like/give attention to them) he is ready to fight

that's when he actively starts going after you, because there's no way he is losing his reina

he is a old fashion romántico

specially if you two start dating after Amado starts working alongside Acosta, we know Amado is taking notes on how to curt such a woman like you

let's just take a second to think on how roast Amado is with Acosta and his men, they’ll be mocking how whipped he is lol but he doesn’t care, he’ll do anything to make you happy:(

so he asks you on a date, on whatever you like, that doesn't matter, but he is HANDS ON to make you choose him<3. he is just very invested that everything is of you liking, that if you go to have dinner, the food is perfect, the lightning is just right and shit

and we all know him, when he wants something he is persistenttt

and doesn't matter if you little resistant to really give him a chance (again, don juán) but he will really really try:( he has one mission and is to make you the happiest:(

after just one date he's EAGER to have a second one. he got a hold on you for a moment now he can't let you go mija

and once he is committed, forget about anything else. no vieja or desmadre outside of you matter anymore. you're his top priority and he makes sure you know that, so you get the idea: the whole relationship starts at your pace, he follows the patrona words

it is worth to address that at first he is hesitant to show you anything about his job, even if you already know. you’re safety goes first so you’re relationship is a bit of a secret but not really a secret, you know??

in public, no one really knows what is going on between you too, just something has change. now he gives himself permission to stare a little longer at your pretty face, he compliments you more often when he sees you but nothing too showy

BUT IN PRIVATE??? jesus fucking christ

when i say this man is romantic???

domestic Amado is the softest and most relax you will ever see him

FOREHEAD KISSES OMG all. the. fucking. time.

it's like a little reminder that he is present and to show you a little affection without too much PDA

and I am just convinced that he gives THE best kisses. he is so passionate and caring, fully embracing the moment. with one hand on your waist and the other on your cheek/hair how could you even doubt that my man is a good kisser???? I CAN'T-

he just lives to make you feel goooood mija

so get the memo: you two are the most foolish in love people to ever exist. he makes you feel like a real princesa. all you ever dream is at your feet, no need to ask

also I want to mention that when he is away from you, like on a work trip or something he most definitely is calling your every single night to just hear your voice:(((

but not everything is perfeeeect:(

i know i know who would've thought????

one big problem i see you having with Amado is him running away from confrontation. he just doesn’t want ANYTHING bad near you and he has a lot of shit going on that it may scare him

also Amado doesn’t communicate really well. you see him having a hard time at work?? he won’t tell you a thingggg. you get frustrated bc you know him like, he can’t escape the wise woman you are, you see between his “no tengo nada, amor, no te preocupes” “una pendejada allá en el trabajo pero no es nada, tú cómo estás, eh, bonita?”  so guess what???? confrontation will happen

although fights/discussions are solved very quickly, neither of you can stay away from eachother so the only option is to eventually loose a little pride and be open:(

so you’ll need patience with him, he’ll come around to his feelings and be open about it, just he needs time. 

at one point he’ll understand that you are very much the medicine of his penares. he’s got you, he won’t need anything more

but don’t worryyyyyy

all is fine babe

at the end he is very much in love and it showwws. the tontín romántico won’t miss a single day to remind you that he is all yoursss

expect a random ramo de flores because he thought of you mid day

him going late for work because he just wanted 5 more minutes with you in the morning

trips to whatever place he had in mind just ‘cause he can. imagine having a call randomly of him just saying “prepárate una maleta con un vestido bonito, te llevo a Los Cabos amor” of some shit like that. we know he flexes about his planes, that is a fact

goofy little smiles when you two encounter each other after a long day

AYyy NO, i’m so soft for him:((((

little i have to tell you that he is the perfect partner, no one goes near to him when he is in love

NSFW part:

BIGGEST TEASE OF ALL TIME

he has make his top priority to know you body. he knowss where and how to get a reaction of you

and he takes avantage of that, you better believe that

he loves to see you trying to conceal his effects on you. imagine you in the passenger seat while his driving and WE KNOW he'll put his hand on your thigh and slowly and without looking at you moving it close to where you need him the most UGHHH

I can fucking picture his smug smile while he does his little ministrations like omg

needless to say that he is a gentle soft dom

there I say it, idc

btw we can't escape from his cocky side, he'll make you beg if you try to challenge him (and that happens more often than not)

he'll have you underneath him, cock drunk with how well he is taking care of you

side note: his fav position most likely is you riding him, don't ask

such a brat tamer energy lol

it is a back and forth on who gets away with their teasing and that little game doesn't end until the other gives in

if it's you is not until he finally gives you what you want, he has you in all fours pounding so good and fast, your mind hazy and your moans slipping from you that you can admit that he won

if it's him is when your on your knees, your mouth full of him but not letting him come to practically beg you to keep going

and on the side of the blowjobssss

he liveeeees for them, there's no other way he wants to end his day then to have his beautiful mujer on her knees pleasing himm

him throwing his head back, hand on your hair but not pushing too much with his breathing getting quicker as you fasten your movements WHAT A SIGHT OMG

and he'll like when you take control of things, when you're the one taking the shots. he appreciates the effort soooo much

but when you give that power to him? oh darlinggg prepárate

we had said how happy he is to make YOU happy and that goes straight up to the bed game.

he makes sure you come first and at least one time before he is inside you

and idk why but I just see him a very skill with his fingers iykyk babe

the foreplay is a MUST between you, he likes to take his time and to really feel you. and that extends to kissing you nonstop until air is much neede

he is such a intense and passionate lover, I have no doubtssss

I see him being a little experimental in bed but you have to propose the things you wanna try, he doesn't push your limits NEVER

not an exhibitionist but loooooves to tease you in public lol

however, something where you get too close to get caught he won't do it, he likes to keep this private business, private

KING OF AFTERCARE

he loves to see you so close when you two are done, with sleepy eyes and satisfied smiles. he is a cuddler for sureee

just know that like everything with him is so fun and full of love babe<3