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sucker4vy · 6 days ago

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BUSY WOMAN, UNLESS YOU CALL TONIGHT .ᐟ

PAIRING: pedro pascal x actress!reader

SYNOPSIS: Pedro and the reader have been caught together multiple times, and now, all eyes are on them more than ever after she’s spotted leaving his apartment. Though she hasn’t said or made the relationship official, she finally breaks her silence at the Gladiator II premiere when an interviewer asks about the recent sighting.

WARNINGS: fem!reader, age gap (reader is in her mid-late twenties), confusing!pedro, situationship, not technically a smau but does include comments and a few posts, the media is obsessed with reader and pedro, eventual smut, no use of yn (except for posts)

WC: 3.2k

A/N: not me taking a whole other day to finish it 😶 honestly this could’ve been so much longer than it was but next time just watch i’ll make it longer

series masterlist | next chapter

Pedro rests his hand on the small of your back as he guides you to the door. He twists the lock and swings it open for you like the gentleman he always is.

As you’re about to step outside, you feel his hand slowly slip away, but it pauses when you do. Turning back to him, you ask, “I’ll see you at the premiere?” Accompanied by an awkward smile.

It’s a question you probably shouldn’t have asked, and judging by his expression, it’s one he’s caught off guard by. “You’re going?” He asks.

“I have nothing else to do that day.” You shy away from him. It was a lie but it’s one that would convince him the most.

Yet for some reason, it still didn't seem to work because disbelief flashed across, quickly replaced by skepticism. “You? Not busy?” You nod curiously at his reaction. “I don’t believe it.”

“Well, believe it,” You laugh softly to yourself and you see his lips twitch, but he’s back to his serious—no, trying to be serious self.

But he can’t help it when the room is filled with silence for another second and then he cracks. He bursts into a hearty laughter and his hand glides up to your nape, guiding your head toward his for a quick peck on the lips.

“Now, I do.” His gaze lingers on your lips, debating whether or not he should steal another kiss—just one last one. You push away before he can lean in again.

Before you turn around he catches a glimpse of a little cheesy grin on your face. “Goodnight, Pedro.”

“Goodnight, sweetheart,” he replies. You look back at him once more as you walk away ever so slowly and you catch him eyeing your body. He notices your figure shift and is quick to look around, suddenly fascinated by his apartment complex. A hand over his mouth and body leaning against the door frame, caught in the act.

You can’t help but giggle at his little sneaky act and you’re pretty sure it’s just as funny to him too because you hear a muffled laugh from behind you. You’ll definitely tease him later about checking you out.

When you step out of the building, you feel the cool air kiss your skin, and you can’t help but wish you had covered up a little more. A skirt was not the best choice for tonight, something you realized a little too late.

In the corner of your eye, you see a white flash. Your eyes widen in surprise as you turn to confront the source, only to find yourself staring directly at a phone.

You move to push the phone out of your face so that you're able to get a look at the actual source, but before you can fully get a good look at their appearance, they're unning for dear life.

In the moment, it’s funny and you scoff at their idiocy, and in that same moment, it hits you. It his you like a ton of bricks.

It feels like everything has slowed down as your mind movesq quick, a thousand thoughts per second, a million of all the possible outcomes run through your head.

Where you are, where you’re standing outside of more specifically Pedro Pascal’s apartment. That photo incriminates you and it’ll prove something that you’ve been trying to keep hidden from the media and yourself.

Behind you, you hear doors open and close, heavy footsteps on pavement, and then a hand on your shoulder. Your head spins around so fast you felt as though you were going to get whiplash.

“Woah, did I scare you?” There’s a teasting lilt in his voice but when he sees your expression, his smile dims. “Is something wrong?”

You exhale deeply to calm your nerves. “I think we’ve been caught.”

—

Different brushes glide over your face, blenders dabbing under your eye, and fingertips gliding over your nose to blend in the highlighter as much as it needed to look perfect.

Your makeup artist, Estelle, who had been all cheery and so talkative seconds ago, is now quiet, focused on her canvas, ensuring everything is flawless. She only speaks when she needs you to tilt your chin up a little or to look that way or this way.

When she’s finished she spins your chair around so that you face her, grabbing you chin gently for you to look at her. Her hand lifts from your chin and ghosts over your nose, drawing back with an unsureness, eyes squinting.

Her face quickly brightens with a loving smile. “You’re all finished!” She spins my chair back around, now facing the vanity. I meet my reflection and I admire Estelle’s work, which she killed like always. Wrapping her arms around my neck, she asks, “You like?”

“I love.” You look up at her with a smile, one that’s genuine but fragile as well.

“You know, this whole time I’ve been doing your glam you’ve been kind of tense, what’s up?” She smirks as if she knows something you don't. “It’s Pedro, huh?”

“No, no, no,” you’re quick to deny. “It’s not Pedro.” Estelle gives you a ‘are you kidding me’ kind of look because the both you know damn well that Pedro Pascal is the reason.

Estelle sighs, walking over to where your dress is hanging. “I know about that whole ordeal, honey. You can’t fool me.” She ushers you to stand up with hand gestures and pushes the dress into your hands. You don’t move from where you stand, only staring down at your dress.

It’s beautiful, bold. Designer? Alexander McQueen. It’s silk and corseted. Though it doesn't really go with the theme of the movie, it’s still a fantastic choice.

It commands attention without screaming for it. It’ll make her stand out on her own terms and possibly, hopefully, draw away attention from all the rumors going around. Maybe everyone will be too focused on her dress and forget about all the times the paparazzi have caught you with Pedro.

But let’s be realistic, you’ll be at the Gladiator II premiere, Pedro’s movie. They’ll be focused less on your dress and more on your appearance, but lucky for you, you have an excuse for that. You’ll say you’re there to meet with the director, that you’re thinking about working with him. You just hope they’ll believe it.

Walking out of the bathroom, you’re met face to face with your assistant, Daphne, whom you call Daph for short. She gives you a once-over and nods her head, looking around and saying, “I don’t know if Pedro’s going to be able to resist you this time around.”

You roll your eyes and mutter a small, “Thanks.” She gives you a thumbs-up and a coy smile.

“Shoes on?” She asks. You nod. “Hair?” Your hairstylist rushes over to you to fix a single strand, tucks it behind your ear, and then steps away. “Alrighty, I think we’re good to go.”

You turn to your glam team, thanking them for all their hard work and then you’re off to the premiere, but not before Estelle shouts, “Say hello to Pedro for me,” which gives everyone in the room a laugh.

You let out a giggle. “Bye, everyone.” And they all give a bye in return, some shouting, “Have fun!”

—

In the car, Daphne is helping you prepare for interviews. You’re sitting one seat over from her, not really paying attention since she has probably been over this a million times within two days.

When she first found out you were going to attend the premiere, she was baffled. “After all the rumors going around? Are you kidding me?” She had said.

You had told her it would be good for you, that you had come up with a reason that makes you look like you are strictly there for business and definitely not because you want to be one of the first ones to see Pedro Pascal in a gladiator costume, possibly all sweaty, and looking criminalally good. You could not pass up this opportunity.

It’s also a chance to clear up any rumors, or at least try to. You’re just really just trying to help your publicist who’s already way too stressed, but you just keep making things worse.

Sunday morning, you had woken up to a phone being pushed into your face, an article with the headline in big bold letters that read “FAMOUS ACTRESS SPOTTED OUTSIDE PEDRO PASCAL'S HOME.”

And it wasn’t your publicist behind that phone, it had been your assistant who had been told by your publicist.

Oh, was Daphne angry? No. She was fuming. “Call him. Now,” she said with a stern tone. And you were going to dial the number to talk things out with Pedro but you really just needed time to let everything sink in, you had just woken up for crying out loud.

You had told Daphne you’d call him later—later meaning that you’d wait for him to call you. He probably hadn’t even seen it yet, or so you told yourself.

So you waited.

And you waited

And, to your disappointment, you waited.

You would check your phone constantly. Every time you found your self drifting off during your meeting you shook yourself awake and checked your phone. Whenever Daphne mentioned something about the rumors you were quick to check your phone.

It got to a point where she literally had to rip your phone away from you just so you can get through a line from a script you were supposed to be rehearsing.

Then, just as you’re pushing your dinner around the plate, you phone buzzes. One buzz. Then another. You freeze

Please don't be a stupid notification. Please—Pedro’s name lights up your screen and you don’t even hesitate to press accept, taking a shaky breath, and brace yourself for what he’s about to tell you.

In the car, Daphne is helping you prepare for interviews. You’re sitting one seat over from her, not really paying attention since she has probably been over this a million times within two days.

She goes through a list of every possible question in every possible form, and you know she's stressed out by the way she just keeps going.

When she first found out you were going to attend the premiere, she was baffled. “After all the rumors going around? Are you kidding me?” She had said.

It’s also a chance to clear up any rumors, or at least try to. You’re just really just trying to help your publicist who’s already way too stressed, but you just keep making things worse.

You should’ve listened to Daphne when she told you not to go to Pedro’s, that you may get caught and it’ll be a big problem if you did. You wished you hadn’t ignored her warnings and simply just brushed her off saying that it would be fine because look at how wrong you were.

Now, all you can do is hope that an interviewer won’t ask about what’s going on between you and Pedro.

At least Pedro is worry-free, he just thinks that you were kidding about attending the premiere but little does he know you’re about to draw lots of attention right now.

—

Your heel hits the red carpet. No one seems to notice you quite yet, which makes you even more anxious for when they do.

Flashes go off a few yards down the carpet where one of the cast members is posing, not Pedro nor Joseph—but Paul. For now all eyes are on him and for you, there’s a fleeting moment of quiet, not literal silence, but the kind of breathless stillness that lives before impact.

You take a careful step forward and as you grow into the view of one of the photographers. He looks almost unsure at first, and he mumbles, “Is that who I think it is?” It’s loud enough for the person next to him to hear and repeat the same name, her head following his. Then one by one all their eyes fly to you as travel along the carpet.

You straighten up once flashes hit your face, smiling nice and big for the camera. You lift your chin up a little more, your arms are at your sides, one resting at you hip.

You move more down along the carpet, and now you’re standing just a few feet away from Paul. In the corner of your eye, you see that Paul notices you, and he shuffles closer over to you.

You look at him and he’s already smiling. “Picture?” He offers.

“Of course.” You lean more into him, wrapping your arm around him and he follows your movement, his hand placed in the middle of your back.

They shout for you to get a little closer together so you do. You lean your head towards his just a tad for one last photo and then he pats your back. “Thanks.” You give him a nod and follow him off the carpet.

Anyone you saw with a microphone you tried to dodge and stay out of their sight. Weaving your way through the crowds, but you couldn’t ignore everyone.

Some of the cast members came up to you and said hi. One of them was Fred, whom you worked with once. You were surprised that he even remembered, considering it had been a while since you had seen each other. Connie had also come to you to say hello, this was actually your first time meeting her. You’ve only heard of her, never have actually seen her in person before, she said the same thing about you.

Connie was so sweet and you guys chatted for a while, but the conversation was cut short when an interviewer snuck up on you. You felt a tap on your shoulder and Connie excused herself so you could be interviewed without interruption, part of you wanted to beg her not to leave you, but you couldn’t.

Where Connie was standing is where the interviewer was standing now. She introduced herself as Steph from Entertainment Tonight, and you're all rainbows and sunshine on the outside, but on the inside you're about to freak out because you know that they’re about to go in deep with these questions.

She looked into the camera, and so did you. “You, my dear, look breathtaking tonight. I have to say this dress is a moment.”

“Thank you, Steph, it means a lot. I really needed something that was bold, especially for tonight, you know?” She agrees, and then her face shifts into one of curiosity.

“We didn’t know we’d be seeing you here tonight, and we were wondering what brought you out?” She holds up the microphone to your lips.

“I have so much respect for everyone on the team and I wanted to see all the hard work they put into this movie come to life.” You continue, “The story scale, the artistry, the history. It all reminds you why you love what you do and it really inspires you.”

“Of course, of course! All of the cast members are so talented and it's such a big night for them. I love how supportive you are!” Her eyes turned away from your for a split second to give the camera a slick grin, then they’re back on you. Her voice dips, now ever so gentle, “A lot of people think your presence tonight has something to do with Pedro Pascal. You were just seen leaving his place late Saturday night. Is you being here simply a coincidence?”

You blink, smile faltering for just a second before you regather yourself. There’s a pause, then a sigh, and you know your silence speaks louder than what you’re about to say right now. “I didn’t come tonight to answer rumors. But I know that if I’m quiet it just makes the noise louder.”

Hesitating and taking a breath, you continue, “I knew that being here tonight would raise some eyebrows, especially after Saturday. I think it’s just reading a little too much into things. Pedro is someone I care about, yes, but…” You glance off to the side, searching for the safest answer. “But caring about someone doesn't mean there’s always a headline in it.”

Steph is silent for a split second, taking the microphone away from you once she realizes you’re not going to continue. “So, you’re just friends?”

Your eyes flicker toward the camera before returning to Steph, forcing a smile that doesn’t quite reach your eyes. “Yes,” is your answer, but your body language says otherwise when you play with the ring around your finger.

“Well, you heard it here first, people. Just friends.” She nods in assurance. “Thank you.”

You’re thankful it’s over, but you can already feel the internet writing headlines. The nerves really got to you during that interview, and you’re sure no one believes that you and Pedro are just friends after you left his house so late at night.

Daphne won’t be too happy either with your answers. You really should’ve gone with what she told you to say in case of this, instead you kind of just freestyled it.

You notice everyone beginning to head to the theatre, so you follow the crowd inside. Before the movie starts, they give a speech to the audience that celebrates everyone behind the making of the film.

One by one all the actors come up and are congratulated, given praise for their work. The whole time you only focus on one of those actors, whose eyes are searching through the audience for one person in particular. You.

He can’t seem to find you in the sea of people, and it’s too late to continue searching because he already needs to take a seat.

So, the movie plays. You sit in the dark, laughing when you’re supposed to, clapping when it’s over, and the credits roll.

To the naked eye, you’re acting normal, but inside you’re unraveling. The entire movie played on one screen, and the interview was on repeat in the other—in your mind.

What if you hadn’t swallowed the part about being more than friends? What if you had told them it was so much more than that?

Frankly, you’re tired of hiding something that has been going on for months. You’re tired of Pedro denying that there’s nothing really going on between you, or at least, you’re tired of him pretending like there’s nothing going on because there is. There’s so much more than what he denies himself.

You quite literally canceled multiple meetings for an upcoming audition on Sunday just so you could squeeze in a fitting for the dress you wore. Replacing a meeting about character backstory for one about about heel height and fabric swatches.

The script you were reading last night? That was for the same audition, now pushed to Wednesday. The meetings for that same audition you had pushed to tomorrow.

And there was a few more things replaced, delayed, or rescheduled just so you could be here tonight. Just so you could support Pedro.

He didn’t ask you to and still, you showed up.

You’re booked and busy. You have a whole career to chase. You have people to call back, scenes to prep, and so much more.

But if he called tonight?

You’d answer.

taglist: @not-the-teen-witch @namelesslosers @oystercat

#pedro pascal #pedro pascal x reader #pedro pascal x you #pedro pascal x y/n #pedro pascal fanfiction #gladiator ll #gladiator ii #gladiator 2 #gladiator movie #actress reader #famous reader #somethin�� sweet trilogy

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pedgito · 1 year ago

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𝐑𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓 𝐇𝐄𝐑𝐄, 𝐑𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓 𝐍𝐎𝐖 | Joel Miller x reader

summary | set in the world of handsome, dirty, rich. joel is celebrating your one year anniversary with a few surprises. alternatively: how fast can ali turn a new pedro pic into a fic? also, bless @undercoverpena —she set me on a dangerous path with this one.

content warning | sugar daddy!joel, reader has no description other than a vague mention of a dress, thigh riding, borderline public sex/voyeurism, the use of a certain undergarment for pleasure, fingering, established relationship, sneaking around, subtle dom!joel & brat!reader, pure filth i do not apologize, un-beta'd

word count — 2.7k

He’s rented out the entire restaurant. All for you.

It doesn’t dawn on you at first, but as the primly dressed workers attend to you at the door, carefully removing the coat off your shoulders while another guides you toward the table in the corner of the restaurant—the rest of the space was dimly lit, except here. The overhead light casted a warm but pale yellow glow down on the table. Two plush, leather chairs that you were sure cost at least half of your monthly rent—not that you paid that, either. Joel had made sure of that.

You tried to deny it in the beginning, to fend off his constant willingness to make sure you didn’t have to stress or lift a finger when it came to finances—that you could focus on your degree without any outside distractions.

Your relationship was still something kept between the both of you, a sacred bond in a bubble that hadn’t been popped yet. It was perfect, too perfect. And you refused to give that up just yet.

“Really?” You ask, scrunching the dress up near your hips as you take a seat in the pulled out chair, careful that it wouldn’t ride up too high, but it seems futile as the moment you both hit the seat, Joel’s palm is settling between your legs. His palm curls around your left thigh, a comforting gesture he did whenever he had a moment to touch you—it doesn’t move, doesn’t linger too close or too far, it’s just there. You rub your thumb over his knuckles and smile.

“I shoulda told them I wanted the center table, huh?” Joel joked, flashing that perfect smile, his cheek dimpling. “Only the best for my girl.”

“Oh, because the empty restaurant you rented out wasn’t enough?” The playful resonance in your tone makes Joel chuckle, but quickly fades as he sees one of the several waiters approaching.

He orders some fancy bottle of wine you can’t pronounce and you can’t help but stare. He’s so…dressed down, compared to you. A simple white shirt, black jeans that he’s worn on several occasions but always hugging his thighs in a way made your mouth fucking salivate.

You weren’t even five minutes into this date and you were ready to cut short and run, saddle up over his lap in the driver’s seat of his truck and sink down on his cock for a quick five minutes of pure bliss, feeling the full extent and intensity of his love for you in the way he let his guard down in those moments.

The second you’re alone he’s moving his hand from your thigh to the nakedness of your neck, sliding around the back and guiding you toward him, a surprisingly gentle kiss against the column of your throat followed by a soft, “Never enough, baby.”

God, he was in a mood today.

It was nearing a year of making…whatever this was official. It wasn’t asking for your hand in marriage or even to be his girlfriend, just a silent agreement that you both wanted whatever it was that you felt for each other, regardless of labeling it. And that was what worked the easiest for you both. You tried not to think about it too often, the outside distractions and betrayals you were allowing to happen when buying into his attraction to you.

But, right now, that was the last thing on your mind.

Joel does all the ordering—a three course meal of chef’s choice that came with a hefty tip.

So, they were very good at leaving you alone. Just as Joel had requested.

“Did you like your gift?” Joel asks after some time, using the cloth napkin to wipe at his mouth, peering up at you as he forks another piece of food into his mouth.

Gift. You huff a soft laugh through your nose behind closed lips.

“Oh, those—” You roll your eyes playfully, poking at your food with your fork, “yeah—of course.”

And you were absolutely wearing them, just like he asked.

A sleek, lace pair of panties with a matching bralette, but the very obvious bump of a vibrator tucked away in the gusset of your underwear was a dangerous, dangerous game. They didn’t come with a remote but you knew exactly where it was, watching the smile on Joel’s face grow more relaxed as he was on his third cup of wine, but somehow more drunk on the sight of you.

“Wearin ‘em?” Joel asks, just to be sure. “Like I told you?”

“Why don’t you find out, Mr. Miller.”

He hadn’t heard that in a minute, his tongue poking at the inside of his cheek as he reached blindly, but with careful precision for the remote in his pocket.

The buzz startles you at first, but it was faint. You could ignore it easily, so you did.

“Eat up,” You motion to him and his forgotten third-course, a too sweet dessert that neither of you could finish on your own, but you were willing to do anything to distract him, “don’t be rude.”

Joel quirks an eyebrow up and chuckles, “Mouthy tonight? Alright.”

It was a specialty of yours, knowing just the right amount of brattiness to get under Joel’s skin.

The vibration picks up without warning, Joel now leaned back in his chair, left leg crossed over right and his hands resting in his lap, pointedly placed over the obvious growing bulge in his jeans that he was attempting to hide.

You hand grips the table in shock, jostling the silverware slightly.

Another soft laugh from Joel and you shoot daggers in his direction.

“In public? Seriously?”

“We’ve done worse,” He shrugs, “remember that night down at the beach over the summer?”

You did. Very well, in fact.

He had fucked you so hard the ache didn’t go away for a week, right there, on the beach—a group of college kids partying not even less than 20 yards away. You knew they were watching and maybe it was the result of genuine, human curiosity. But, the whistles and shouts—it sent a bolt of excitement down your spine, causing you to squeeze around Joel’s cock as he pumped into you, coming inside of you with your face pressed into the sand.

It wasn’t your proudest moment, but damn did it make the ache between your thighs so much worse as the memory floods your mind and Joel seems to notice you becoming spacey, nudging it up a few more notches and that causes a seering look of warning, teeth gritting as you gripped for his thigh, blunt nails digging in while your other snuck between your thighs, gripping hard on your dress as you squeezed your legs shut against your hand.

“Come here,” Joel says as he beckons with two fingers, curling them in a way you were all too familiar with.

“Joel, not here—” You stress, looking around at the vacant restaurant.

You couldn’t even hear them moving around in the kitchen anymore. You turn back to Joel and he’s still waiting, daring you as he scoots his chair back a few more inches. He offers a hand, gently removing the one gripping his thigh and you feel your body moving against your better judgment, so willing and pliant to his touch.

He maneuvers you until you’re straddling his thigh, hand gripping your waist as he forces you to take a seat, the broadness of his thigh, the taut muscle against the press of the vibrator as it forcefully dug into your already swollen clit. You gasp, gripping the tablecloth in desperation.

“Go on,” Joel encourages, “right here—I already know what you want, baby.”

You used to think he only enjoyed the idea of you using anything but his cock to get yourself off, but you quickly realized that it was your favorite thing to do—it was the only time he got cockier than usual, more teasing, seeing how easily riding his thigh would unravel you. It felt primal, that need for release and it was building in your core, that tingling heat lingering in wait.

“If they come back—”

“They won’t,” He stresses, his voice gruff and low as a palm spreads out over your back, the other one finding its home on your thigh, so dangerously close to the hem of your underwear underneath the silk dress, “slipped them a note—”

“Don’t tell me you t-tipped them so you could get your fuckin’ rocks off in the middle of din—” Joel increases the vibration another level and your jerk, holding back the strangled moan that dared to escape as you cant your hips against his thigh, “fuck, Joel. This is—”

Joel shushes you, fingers crawling up your back until he can grip the back of your neck, holding it tight as he pulls you up, head falling back instinctively against his hand, “Ride it, sweetheart.”

You can’t help the subtle rock of your hips, eyes scanning the room anxiously—you’ve never been this intimate in public, at least not with the looming chance that anyone could walk in and see you; arms spread out to grip the table cloth and Joel’s hands all over you, leaning forward over his leg. The table provided enough cover that unless someone decided to step within a few feet, they couldn’t see anything.

Still, your heart raced.

“Come on,” He teases, the subtle twang to his voice that had you clenching around nothing, the constant hum of the vibrator tucked away in your panties doing nothing to help quell the ache, “I rented out this restaurant for us, asked them to give us some privacy and you’re still feelin’ shy?”

“If someone were to walk by, Joel—”

Joel grips at your neck tighter suddenly, pulling you until his chest is against your back.

“I’ll turn that thing all the way up if I need to and it’ll stay on ‘til we get back home.”

His place, he means. He often called it home because it had become that to you. You had your own place, your own things, but you still found yourself there more often than not. A drawer in his closet tucked away with your belongings, your toiletries tucked away in a cabinet so Sarah wouldn’t ask questions. You’ve become masters of this game of hide and seek, managing to keep this entire thing quiet for close to a year.

Maybe it was just dumb luck.

He adds emphasis on his statement as his other hand slips between your legs and under the silk hem of your dress, palm pressing flat against your cunt and leaving you no room to wiggle away, hips jerking against his touch as you moan out, your hand slapping over your mouth at the sound.

“I’ll give you the next sixty seconds, baby,” Joel warns, glancing down at the shiny Rolex on his wrist, “if you don’t come, it’s gonna be a hell of a ride back.”

As if to make you suffer more, he slips a finger between the wet, sticky fabric of your underwear and over the line of your cunt, dragging through your slick and slipping a finger inside of you wordlessly, angling the vibrator stuffed inside the gusset of your panties against your clit with perfective precision—feeling the throb of your pussy around his fingers, the tight clench of your walls, you find yourself rocking against his thigh mindlessly, desperate to chase that relief.

You couldn’t breathe—the feeling caught in your throat as he lifted his leg only a few centimeters higher, foot raised off his heel, your dress slipping up slightly higher under his grip and allowing him a clear view of your ass, the delicious curve and the black lace that clung to your skin. He could pull his cock out and get himself off there within just a few minutes if he really wanted to and slip himself inside you right as he came, knowing how much you enjoyed being stuffed full of him.

“Attagirl,” He commends you, a grin growing on his face that you unfortunately can’t see, but you feel it—his gaze, the hot press of his hands on your body, “just like that.”

Your eyes fall closed, heading bowing as he releases his hold on your neck to grip at the fabric bunched at your waist, slipping his hand over bare skin, fingertips pressing into the flesh of your waist, aiding in the hurried rock of your hips. The feeling of fullness comes from his fingers when he slips in a second, squeaking out a quiet “Fuck,” as your hand slips, slapping against his other thigh for support, accidently brushing your fingers against the remote tucked away in his pocket and dialing up the vibrator to the max, unknowing that it was only a level off.

“‘’S right there, darlin’,” Joel softens his tone, picking up the pace of his fingers fucking into you, his grip on your hip tighter, undoubtably ruining his jeans for the night, but he clearly didn’t mind.

The feeling builds—the quick and constant stimulation does nothing to help, sending you flying over the edge with a gasp, crying out Joel’s name as he keeps you stuck, pulling out his fingers in an instant and turning off the vibrator, leaving you to wade through the orgasm untouched.

“There you go, baby,” He coos, “makin’ a goddamn mess on my jeans, aren’t you?”

You nod, feeling dizzy as your head spins and your body goes light, whining through the sensitive friction of the denim against your cunt and Joel slides a comforting hand up your spine, rubbing against the middle of your back.

“Still with me, baby?”

You nod quietly, raising your head up slowly.

Joel chuckles lowly, patting gently at your thighs until you turn sideways in his lap. He smiles softly at the disheveled state of you, much less composed than a moment ago.

“What was that about?” You ask after a moment of gentle care, his lips pressing against your neck, chin, before pressing against your lips in the most tame kiss he’s ever given you.

He’s checking in.

“Wanted to cross somethin’ off my list.”

You raise your eyebrows in pleasant surprise, a small laugh bubbling from your chest as you adjust your dress over your chest, “A list? Like…for sex?”

Joel shakes his head, pulling his lips together in a nonchalant frown.

“No—well, there’s some of that on there but…things I wanna do with you.”

“Oh,” Color you intrigued, you push one of his imperfectly styled curls back behind his ear, “care to share?”

Joel swipes a dollop of whipped cream on his fingers and shakes his head, “Where’s the fun in that, baby?” You shrug as he presses the cream to your lips and you open dutifully, allowing him to press the whipped sweetness against your tongue, mixed with the taste of yourself as you close your lips and suck just for show, kissing his fingertip teasingly as he pulls away and pinches playfully at your thigh.

You laugh airily, reaching for your phone on the table as you turn to him, pulling up your camera.

“Wait—you really have to see the look on your face,” Instead of keeping the dumbstruck look on his face, he brings his hands to his mouth in the act of blowing you a kiss and you snap the picture with a smile, letting out a startled yelp as he tips you back slightly, nearly into the table as he angles your body to allow his lips to touch your ear.

“Take those off,” He tells you, “otherwise I’ll be tempted again.”

“No self control, Mr. Miller?”

Joel catches your chin between the thumb and pointer of his left hand, cutting off the small giggle that starts to escape your mouth and his eyes are pensive for a brief moment before softening, “Do as I say, darlin’. We got a long drive back.”

You nod, feeling his thumb swipe over your bottom lip before he’s helping you off his lap, swatting at your ass playfully as your feet hit the floor.

“Yes, sir,” You reply flippantly, leaning in to press a quick kiss to his cheek before you disappear.

Joel smirks to himself as he reaches for his wallet.

You were right, without a doubt.

Joel had no self control when it came to you and he quickly realized that he’d be willing to do just about anything to make you happy.

divider creds: @/saradika-graphics

#joel miller #joel miller smut #joel miller x reader #joel miller x you #joel miller x y/n #pedro pascal characters #tlou fanfiction #the last of us fanfiction #pedro pascal fandom #pedro pascal #my writing

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chrystal-ink · 5 months ago

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Shadow X GN Reader

Close to you

Based off of this head cannon post. you and Shadow cuddle for the first time. Warnings: An Extreme amount of fluff, so much it almost rivals Shadow's chest.

Being in stasis for fifty years does something to you, ever since he woke up Shadow had known nothing but cold. it was in the air, in his lungs, everywhere. Biting, stinging at him, unable to fight it. How could he?

He tried hot beverages, jackets, blankets. Not even the finest sheets could fill the empty space Shadow felt.

Overtime he got used to it, he barley felt the sting anymore. the empty space screaming at him now reduced to white noise. he had grown numb to the cold, accepting it as a part of his life. just another thing separating him from everyone else.

that was until one day, you changed everything.

It started out as an accident. a small brush against his arm as you were passing by, the sensation barley lasted a second but for the first time he felt relief the biting cold dissipating for a brief moment.

"Oh, sorry Shadow."

"It's okay Y/N. Just be more careful next time."

"Sure thing, See ya"

"yah, Bye"

That night Shadow laid in bed stroking the small area you touched, unable to sleep.

"How did they do that?" he thought to himself. he couldn't make sense of it, he tried everything to get rid of the cold he felt, and in one fleeting second you had managed to fight it off for him.

A few months later, you did it again.

It was your second date and shadow was walking you home. the streets were empty except for the two of you the stars guiding the two of you to your destination.

"The stars are beautiful tonight" you commented

"It's a lot different looking up at them then being amongst them."

"What was that like?"

"The constellations were un recognizable me and Maria used to make up our own."

"sounds like fun"

"It was enjoyable although, I don't think the other scientists would agree"

you giggled as you turned your attention to the sky. the stars twinkled above you illuminating the night.

mindlessly your hand had drifted against his knuckle's barley touching.

the small moment sent a wave of warmth through his hand, but before he could even comprehend the feeling you took his hand in yours and held it.

You didn't let go and if he was being honest with himself he didn't want you to let go. somehow even through your gloves you had managed to break through the chill.

for the last few blocks shadow had gotten a taste of relief, but nothing could have prepared him for what would come the next time the two of you made contact.

The two of you had been official for the better part of a month. Shadow was over at your apartment watching a movie with you. the two of you sitting side by side, not uncomfortable but a little stiff to the outside viewer.

Shadow's attention was fully on the screen, the plot was a little cheesy for his taste but you had claimed it as your favorite movie so he was determined to complete it. he had been successful so far, that was until he felt a weight on his shoulder.

Turning he saw that you had placed your head on his shoulder using him to keep you upright.

normally with this kind of contact Shadow would have been resistant, shoving whomever off of him. but with you, things were different. not only did he accept your touch, he wanted more.

His arm moved on it's own wrapping itself around you bring you in closer. you happily accepted his guidance laying your head on his chest, not yet brave enough to burry your face in the chest fluff though.

you wrapped your arms around his middle holding him in a sweet embrace.

Shadows breath hitched, the sensations coming to him all at once. He felt your warmth cutting through the cold that had been so present. he felt your tight squeeze around him fighting off the emptiness he felt around him.

Colors grew brighter, a strange lightness fell upon him. For the first time in years Shadow had felt relief. Relief from the cold that had plagued him for the past fifty years, relief from the numbness he felt every day since he woke up.

He felt you nuzzle into him, sending another wave of warmth throughout him. he heard a faint purr escape your chest. he smiled wrapping you tighter in his arms. he didn't want this to end.

Then he felt it, a small vibration in his chest that reverberated through his whole body. He was confused until he heard it he was purring. He wasn't even aware he could until now. it was completely involuntary, but not unwelcome.

The two of you held onto each other, purring in tandem until the credits ended.

"so what did you think?" you asked softly.

"I loved it." He Responded. "Can we do this every week?"

#shadow the hedgehog x reader #shadow x reader #shadow the hedgehog #shadow #x reader #sonic fanfiction #not beta read #fluff #shadow fluff #I have to wake up in two hours to catch my plane wish me luck

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call-me-strega · 3 months ago

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Frostcup (Jack Frost x Hiccup Horrendous Haddock) has come out of nowhere and consumed my mind. The brain worms are going crazy so please consider:

Human!Jack AU where Jack is a normal shepherd boy who lives on Berk. He's a little older than Hiccup, and even though he's not the most conventional Viking, he's still respected because he's lowkey Gothi's apprentice.

He's got latent magic that the village elder is teaching him to harness (bc I believe she'd be knowledgeable abt that, that old lady is magical, I swear). It's not super obvious, but it's in the ways he's never lost a sheep to a dragon (he's lowkey communing with them like how Valka did with Cloudjumper) or the way he brings stories to life when he's entertaining children in the great hall or the way his mischievous smile sends literal chills down people's spines. Jack is capable and relatively well-liked in the community, if regarded as a bit of an odd-ball.

I imagine he was a bit of an inspiration/role model to the will-be riders, but especially to Hiccup since Jack always defended him when he got picked on for being small and un-viking-like. I think part of the reason Hiccup would be desperate to prove himself bc he wants to impress people like Jack and Astrid, who he views as ideals. I also think he'd go to Jack and try to subtly dig for advice on how to potentially heal or help Toothless, which would make Jack suspicious. He'd investigate and find Hiccup and Toothless in the clearing, but unlike Astrid who confronts them in the movie, he'd pull Hiccup aside and tell him he knows later that night.

Hiccup would panic and ask him not to tell anyone, offering to take him on a ride to prove Toothless isn't dangerous. Jack calms him down enough to point out he hasn't told anyone yet and that he's willing to trust Hiccup on this, but he'll take Hiccup on that ride anyway. He even confesses the reason he's never lost a sheep is because he's never actually tried to fight a dragon, simply convince them to leave.

Later, when Hiccup introduces Jack and Toothless, they get along almost instantly. Toothless is wary at first but Jack approaches him carefully, guided by Hiccup. Once Toothless recognizes that there is magic inside Jack he instantly warms up and in the future Hiccup will complain that his dragon likes Jack more than him. They go for a flight and Jack is convinced. He tells Hiccup he'll support him no matter what happens.

Later on Hiccup is still caught by Astrid, and he repeats the flight tactic since it worked last time, though Toothless decidedly likes Astrid less than Jack. So she still goes with them and finds the nest just sans romantic vibes this time. When the get back he tells her Jack knows and the three of them end up talking about it.

Astrid asks Jack why he didn't say anything and Jack declares that he has faith in Hiccup and agrees dragons aren't all bad. Later, when the adults go looking for the nest Jack and Astrid convince him to do something (and since Jack doesn't have an official dragon yet he makes do with the Terrible Terror from the arena).

Blah Blah Blah stuff goes down, canon ending. Idk about stuff after that but at some point Jack gets a dragon, is asked out by Hiccup, and meets the Bewilderbeast that awakens his latent magic, giving him ice powers, a white streak in his hair, and one of his eyes turns blue. Not necessarily in that order.

Oh and just as an extra Stoick's attitude towards Jack is much like his canon one towards Astrid. He quite likes the boy bc he lowkey reminds him of Valka. At some point he tries to bond with Hiccup and awkwardly asks if he's interested in Astrid. When Hiccup denies this he follows up by asking if he's interested in Jack to which Hiccup promptly turns red. Stoick tells him he's got no reason to be ashamed even claiming that Jack reminds him of his mother, while wishes that the ground would just swallow him up bc he's not talking to his dad about his crush.

#crossover #rise of the guardians #how to train your dragon #rotg #httyd #httyd x rotg crossover #hiccup haddock #jack frost #hiccup haddock x jack frost #frostcup #hijack #human!jack au #childhood friends au #the brainworms are worming

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dakusan · 6 days ago

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📁 ASK DUMP 𓆩🩸𓆪 26 JUNE 2025

HELLOOOO EVERYONE yes yes I KNOW I missed Wreck Me Wednesday, yes I rage-deleted my Sims 4 CC folder out of spite, yes I spiralled over grey sweatpants and forgot to drink water BUT!!! I return bearing GIFTS. This is the official feral ask flood and all of you being absolute MENACES in the best way.

You sent asks. I short-circuited. Now we suffer together.

Let’s rot. 🩸🖤✨

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👻 ANON LOGGED: "What if someone went for Chan’s blood doll instead—lies, forged receipts, fake scandals, until she breaks and pulls away from him?"

OH 👻 ANON YOU MONSTER. you broke channie's doll. you wounded the empire boy. you planted a lie in a palace of blood and now the whole thing is cracking.

but fine. let’s answer. sharp pain first, then the sugar—just how Chan likes it.

⸺⟡⸺

Chan doesn’t flinch at threats. He’s had fangs to his throat before. He built this empire from ashes and rage, and he’s watched men far bigger than you crawl. But they didn’t go for the king. They went for the girl in silk sheets and stolen glances. They went for the soft thing he keeps in his arms like a rosary.

The threats? He handed them to Changbin with a yawn.

The letters? Had Minho do a scent check. All dead ends. He figured they gave up.

But then… You flinch when he touches you. You stop calling him “my sun” and starts asking for space. You won’t look him in the eye when he drinks from you.

He doesn’t understand at first. He assumes it’s stress. Overwork. Hormonal instability.

Until he finds the manila envelope under your pillow. Photos. Screenshots. Lies, doctored messages, faked receipts, twisted stories. Actors claiming to be former dolls. Accusations of cruelty. Of abandonment. Of “burning them out.”

All false. But just true enough to hurt you.

You stop sleeping in his bed. You start crying after feeding. You ask for termination papers.

Not because you hate him. But because you think you've been protecting a monster. Because you can't tell what's true anymore. And because you think if he ever really loved you, he'll let you go.

Chan is powerful. Commanding. Unshakable. But he is not cruel, hurt yes, but not cruel. So he says nothing. Just nods. Folds his hands. And says: “If that’s what you want, you’re free. You always were.”

But dolls don’t thrive without their keepers. And soul-bonded ones? They wither.

You lose color. Stop eating. Wake up cold and aching with phantom pressure where his hand used to rest. And then the truth surfaces.

The actors get sloppy. The scheme leaks. Minho finds one. Changbin traces the wire. Jisung decrypts the audio.

You hear it. All of it.

One night, you're standing outside Luke Health. No pass. No warning. Just eyes rimmed red and fingers trembling. He sensed you here, so of course he walks out to find you already crying. Falling to your knees. Not for forgiveness — but because the bond hurts too much. Being apart ripped you open.

And Chan? He doesn’t move. Doesn’t speak. He just kneels with you. Takes your hands. Kisses each wrist.

“You never needed to beg. You were always mine. And I was always yours.”

You are being guided inside, to his office, where he pulls you into his lap and tells you the truth. Everything. Lets you cry until your sobs go silent.

And when you finally, finally, move back in with him. Share the same bed again. Sleep together, Chan's arm stays wrapped around your waist, firm, just to be sure you're not leaving him again. Not ever again.

⸺⟡⸺

now go apologize to channie for hurting him 💋🦇

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🧊 ANON LOGGED: "What happens if an asexual soulmate tries to bond with vampire!SKZ, even though PIV is off the table?"

Hi my darling,

First off — thank you so much for the ask, and I want to offer a gentle apology in advance. This answer might not be what you hoped for, but I want to be honest and respectful with you, always.

Sadly, it won’t work. And that’s okay. Not every universe is built for every body.

This isn't a "representation fail" thing. This is a biological incompatibility in a feral, bloodborn system where intimacy = sustenance = survival = anchoring = sex. Not because vampires are horny for the hell of it (though… they absolutely are), but because Abnormal biology requires a deep, carnal, penetrative ritual to:

seal bonds,

regulate magical overload,

and safely transfer volatile power.

Think less romance novel, more blood-coded circuitry.

❌ Asexuality vs Abnormal Vampire Lore

Asexuality = completely valid. Always.

But Abnormal vampirism is a different beast:

Magic-triggered reproductive chaos.

Biochemical heatstorms.

Soul-deep regulation through penetrative feeding and sex.

There’s no “skip” button. There’s no “just cuddling” workaround. There’s only burn or bind.

If someone’s hard limit is no penetration ever, then it becomes a biological mismatch in this world. The vampire would:

enter looping hunger states,

suffer rage feedback and ferality,

and the bond would never stabilize.

You’d both suffer. Or worse — implode the tether trying to force something that this universe physically doesn’t allow.

💔 What Happens If You Try?

The vampire stays starving, no matter how sweet you are.

The bond stays fractured. Unsealed.

You become a flickering blood ghost — close enough to ache, never enough to satisfy.

Eventually, the vampire either detonates, or is forced to sever the connection.

Some vampires might try to resist. Might try to find workarounds. But even the softest boys burn in the end. Because this world? It’s not built for denial. It’s built on visceral surrender.

I’ll be honest with you too — I don’t write ace stories. I don’t live that experience, I’m not surrounded by people who do and I haven’t studied the nuances of the identity. I don’t want to speak on something I don’t live or deeply understand. I’m not the writer for that, and I won’t fake it just to check a box.

What I can do is protect the rules of this world — and keep it honest.

This isn’t about exclusion — it’s about worldbuilding integrity. I want every reader to feel safe and respected, even if this particular universe isn’t a match for them. If you're ace and still enjoy reading from the outside, watching the fire from a safe distance — you are so welcome here. Just know the fire burns hot, and it doesn’t change its nature.

🩸 With love, always — and fangs bared 💋🦇

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🧎🏼‍♀️ ANON LOGGED: "Will you be doing the Bang Chan tattoo artist fic? Because I am on my knees for it."

OH BABES 😭💘 HE'S COMING—but he’s the grand finale.

i've done minho now, so next in line is:

🥀 changbinnie ☁️ felix 🔥 channie

🧎🏻‍♀️ so yes. yes i plan on it. but i am SAVING that man for last because when he comes?? you will not be left standing.

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🐈‍⬛ ANON LOGGED: "What if vampire!SKZ had an easily overstimulated soulmate?"

OH 🐈‍⬛ ANON. YOU GET IT. YOU GET THE SOULMATE WHO’S JUST BUILT DELICATE. like their nervous system was spun from lace and static. they were made to tremble. made to sob. made to overload.

⸺⟡⸺

👥 FAMILY GATHERING VERSION:

you step into the vampire family’s private estate and it’s just—

🩸 too many new scents 🩸 too many sharp glances 🩸 too many ancient creatures asking “is this the one?”

you're already sweating. blinking too hard. trying to hold a wine glass with shaking fingers.

and then you catch sight of him across the room— your vampire. your anchor. and you BOLT.

“I don’t know who they are, I don’t know where I am, you weren’t looking at me—”

he just catches you. pulls you into his lap. fangs brushing your ear. hands around your waist.

“Shh, baby. You don’t have to know anyone. You just have to stay with me.”

you melt. bite goes in to regulate you. eyes flutter. brain goes fuzzy. now you're just blinking prettily while the family laughs knowingly.

💀 BEDROOM VERSION:

you think round one is over. you think he’ll give you time to recover. you’re wrong.

you’re already sobbing into the sheets. hips twitching. thighs quivering. and he’s still hard, still hungry, still purring filth into your neck like:

“Don’t crawl away from me, baby. You’re mine. You said you could take it.”

you didn’t say that. you moaned it. with a bite mark already on your collarbone. so now you’re crying. not because it hurts—because it’s too much. but it’s the good kind. the soulbond kind. the “i love you so much i’m going dumb” kind.

and when he bites again—mid-thrust? your brain short-circuits. you scream his name like a spell. and your last coherent thought is:

“i’m gonna die loving him like this.”

and maybe you do. but he brings you back with a kiss and a cold cloth.

⸺⟡⸺

thank you for the ask, you sinful genius 🐈‍⬛ come back anytime 💋🦇

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🖤 ANON LOGGED: “I’ve read half your filth, I’m feral over grey sweatpants, and I will not be elaborating.”

🖤🖤🖤 ANON MY LOVE!!! YOU’RE HERE!!!!! 🖤🖤🖤

the 🌙 slot may be taken, but listen… the black heart? it suits you. you’re dark. mysterious. you belong here. welcome to the blood-slick, thirst-ridden inbox family.

also YOU’VE READ HALF THE MASTERLIST?? I AM SCREAMING.

the fact that you “have thoughts” about the grey sweatpants and chose to withhold them like a menace?? ICONIC. POWERFUL. YOU SCARE ME. I WANT MORE.

thank you for being here. for reading. for being soft and sexy and lovely. i’m so so glad to have you as 🖤 anon and i promise to keep feeding you unholy content until we both pass out from overstimulation and plot twists.

sending u forehead kisses w consent 💋🦇

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🧋 ANON LOGGED: “I reread your smut like it’s gospel and asked how fast SKZ would fold over a little skin.”

welcome to the unholy circle, sweet boba baby 😭💖. you are now officially on the roster as 🧋 anon, bringer of praise, thirst, and dangerous questions.

ALSO?? THE COMPLIMENTS??? my heart is punching holes in my ribcage.

AND THIS QUESTION??? oh. oh we’re gonna be so evil. tight shirts. short skirts. roommate tension. hands twitching. filthy, repressed SKZ energy. i’m feral just THINKING about it. LET'S GO

⸺⟡⸺

❤️‍🔥 SKZ REACTING TO YOU WEARING SOMETHING JUST A LITTLE TOO REVEALING… AS THEIR ROOMMATE / SECRET CRUSH.

BANG CHAN

He's doing everything in his power not to stare—but then you reach for the top shelf and your shirt lifts just enough. His jaw clenches. His knuckles go white around his coffee mug. “Are you trying to kill me?” he mutters, barely audible. And when you blink innocently at him? Oh no. He's clearing his throat, adjusting his sweatpants, avoiding eye contact like it's a full-time job. Will not act on it… unless you sit on the couch beside him with a blanket, and his hand accidentally grazes your thigh. Then it’s over. “...We should talk,” he whispers—right before kissing you like he’s been dying for it.

LEE KNOW

He notices. Of course he does. That little black skirt you’re wearing? It’s short. Dangerous. And he’s watching like a hawk while pretending he isn’t. “Did you lose your pants or is this a new strategy?” he asks dryly, but his ears are pink. You cross your legs on the couch and his eyes drop—for half a second. And that’s all it takes. He gets up and leaves the room. But he comes back. Leaning over the back of the couch, voice low: “You wore that on purpose, didn’t you?” And suddenly you’re pinned to the cushions and his hand is sliding up your thigh like it’s always belonged there.

CHANGBIN

One look at your outfit and he forgets how to function. Wide eyes. Sweaty palms. Tongue-tied disaster. “Uh—th-that’s… that’s a nice shirt,” he stammers. “Is it… new?” It’s not. He’s just never seen that much of your cleavage at once and now he’s spiralling. When you bend over to grab something, he audibly chokes. And when you come over and sit next to him like nothing’s happening??? His inner monologue is SCREAMING. Eventually he blurts out, “You can’t wear stuff like that around me, I’m not strong enough.” And then—quietly, almost desperately— “…Do you want me to touch you?” (He hopes the answer is yes. It is.)

HYUNJIN

You walk out of your room in that tiny little skirt, half a tank top, and he stops breathing. Literally. Forgets how. “You going somewhere?” he asks, but he’s not even pretending to be casual. He's leaned against the kitchen counter, sipping water like it’ll save him, jaw tight, eyes burning holes in your thighs. And when you lean over to grab something? He inhales through his nose like a man trying to resist the devil. “…You really shouldn’t wear that around me.” Your laugh makes it worse. “Unless you want me to do something about it,” he adds—and then waits. Waits to see if you’ll bite back. You do. The water bottle hits the floor and so do your morals.

HAN JISUNG

You come in wearing that tiny crop top and a skirt that’s clearly illegal. He stares for a second too long, then looks away like he’s been caught looking at porn in church. “Wow! Haha! That’s a… cool outfit!” he squeaks. He’s so red you’re worried he’ll combust. But when you bend over? Oh. Now he’s chewing his thumb, fidgeting, pretending to be chill. You sit next to him on the couch and he whispers, “You’re playing a dangerous game.” You: “What game?” Him: “The one where I lose control and ruin our friendship in 0.5 seconds.” (He does. You both love it.)

FELIX

Felix adores you. Would never touch you without permission. But then you walk into the kitchen in a soft little off-the-shoulder shirt with no bra. And it’s like someone flipped a switch. He stares. Silently. Lip between his teeth. You ask if something’s wrong and he just… hums. Then, softly: “Do you know what you’re doing to me right now?” When you pretend not to, he steps closer. “Maybe you want me to lose it.” Oh, he loses it. You end up pressed against the fridge with his hands under your shirt and his breath hot in your ear.

SEUNGMIN

He’s so fucking smug when you enter the room, like, “Really? That’s what you’re wearing?” Raises an eyebrow. Makes a sarcastic comment. Pretends to be unbothered. He is bothered. So. Bothered. He can’t stop glancing. His fingers twitch when you sit close. Then you laugh and his eyes drop straight to your lips, to your thighs, back up. You cross your legs. He crosses a line. “You keep testing me like this,” he murmurs, “and you’ll find out exactly how good I am at making you beg.” And oh, you find out.

JEONGIN

He starts off innocent. Flustered. Giggly. “Whoa… you look cute.” Can’t make eye contact. Doesn’t know where to look. But then you stretch, and the shirt rides up. The skirt shifts. His eyes lock in. He swallows. And he does not look away this time. You giggle. Call him out. “What? I’m just admiring,” he says, voice low. “You shouldn’t tease your roommate, you know. That’s how you end up in my lap.” And suddenly… that’s exactly where you are.

⸺⟡⸺

thank you, my sweet lil boba menace 😭🖤 for this question, for your praise, for being insane in the exact way i like. welcome to the chaos. you are now fully initiated. there’s no way out.

love you 💋🦇

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🩺 ANON LOGGED: “What if getting better meant letting him taste the trust in your bloodstream?”

HELLO MY BELOVED BLOOD-BASED ROMANTIC 🩸😭. thank you for this ask. THANK YOU for this concept. it’s so gentle and so devastating and so hot and i want to chew on it like a sacrament.

you’re getting added to the Sunday Softdrop request queue IMMEDIATELY. you said: “hey what if soulmate vamp!chan felt their healing in the flavor of their blood,” and my soul folded like origami.

you want him to taste trust. you want him to know they believe in him now. that’s so intimate i want to cry and also write it 4 times in a row.

your brain is beautiful. your vibes are immaculate.

thank you for reading, for working so hard, and for coming here to rest your heart and thirst. you’re safe here. you’re welcome here 💋🦇

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🧨🩸 ANON LOGGED: “What if I gave a vampire a jealousy arc and watched the world burn?”

OOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHH ANON. YOU’VE OPENED THE BLOOD-GATES.

you think they’d be patient. but you are WRONG. you think they’d respect boundaries. but they’re vampires. born, bred, and blood-bonded to you. and now you’re out here kissing someone who isn’t them?? they feel it. they taste it. your body is bonded to the wrong hands, the wrong scent, the wrong mouth. and they’re going to lose their goddamn minds.

so here’s what happens:

⸺⟡⸺

Bang Chan – goes feral with a smile.

he’ll act polite. he’ll pretend to be calm. he’ll offer to “meet them.” but he’s already rewritten your future. he doesn’t need to get physical—he’ll win with words. one conversation. one look. one soft, “you don’t even see them the way I do, do you?” you’ll leave that relationship and crawl to him willingly, already marked.

Minho – dangerous. precise. inevitable.

he won’t say anything at first. but he’s always there. watching. calculating. the first time you flinch when your partner raises their voice? he’ll be in your doorway that night, silent, calm, hand on your cheek. “you deserve worship,” he’ll say. “not that.” and he’ll make you feel it.

Changbin – physically aches with jealousy.

he tries. he really tries. but his fists are curling into his palms, and his jaw is locked so tight it creaks. he’ll tell you straight: “i can’t pretend this doesn’t drive me insane. i need you. you’re mine.” and if you hesitate—just for a moment—he’ll be at your throat. softly. reverently. “i’ll wait,” he says, but the hunger will never stop.

Hyunjin – tragic, romantic, and apocalyptic.

he writes poetry about you. burns it. rewrites it with blood. he cries over you. but that doesn’t mean he’ll let you go. you’ll feel him in dreams. in mirrors. in the tug behind your heart. when your partner touches you, it feels wrong now. because he’s already inside you—mind, soul, bond. “you’ll come to me,” he whispers.

Jisung – turns manic. obsessive. unstable in the prettiest way.

he spirals. talks to himself. laughs when he sees you kiss someone else and then punches the wall. but he waits. he waits for the moment your lover slips, messes up, lets you down. and then he’s there. arms open. fangs bared. “it’s me. it’s always been me. just say the word.” you do.

Felix – sunshine gone unhinged.

he smiles. he hugs you. he congratulates you. but he can’t touch you without growling. he dreams about draining them dry and bottling your moans instead. his light dims. until one night, he snaps. “don’t you get it? i was made for you. and i’m not letting you go.” his bite is the softest thing you’ve ever felt. you never want anyone else again.

Seungmin – strategic. terrifying. terminally calm.

he doesn’t interfere. he lets the relationship rot from within. all he does is wait. observe. whispers in your ear when you're half-asleep, “he doesn’t know how to love you. i do.” and one day, you believe him. you show up at his door. he lets you in. “took you long enough,” he mutters. then he ruins you, permanently, perfectly.

Jeongin – youngest but scariest when provoked.

at first he’s heartbroken. confused. but when he sees the one you’ve chosen over him? the rage sets in. not loud. not violent. just cold. sharp. precise. he won’t say a word. just look at you with those molten eyes and whisper, “you know it’s supposed to be me.” and eventually, you can’t resist him anymore. he drinks you slow. and marks you so no one else ever can again.

⸺⟡⸺

anon… thank you for this unhinged, delicious, emotionally violent question 🥀🩸. welcome to the chaos 💋🦇

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🦄 ANON LOGGED: “If I must perish in a heatwave, I want to do it on a vampire’s silk bedsheets with a cold drink and fangs in my neck.”

AAAAA 🦄 ANON YOU BEAUTIFUL DELULU ANGEL 😭🩷 you’re melting, I’m melting, we’re all melting—but at least we’re doing it in vampire luxury.

⸺⟡⸺

🔥 “How would vamp!SKZ care for their blood doll during an extreme heat wave?”

Bang Chan – “Babe, you’re gonna combust—get in the damn fridge.”

He’s the responsible one™ who tried to warn you. You: “I’m fine.” Chan, staring at your sweaty forehead and limp tank top: “You are NOT.” He turns his entire walk-in freezer into a cuddle den. Throws a mattress in. A playlist. Cold drinks. You sleep there now. Also he keeps pressing his freezing hand to your inner thighs and going “better?” like he’s not trying to kill you.

Lee Know – pretends not to care, is secretly plotting your cryogenic salvation.

You’re sprawled on the floor in a sports bra. “You look like microwaved sin,” he deadpans. Meanwhile, he’s brewing iced tea and silently adjusting the AC to arctic tundra. Later that night? You wake up to find him spooning you shirtless with a literal frozen pack of blood bags pressed to your neck. “Shut up and go back to sleep,” he mumbles, already half hard from how warm you are.

Changbin – panics and over-cares like a gym rat in a crisis.

He’s googling “how to cool down a human” like you’re a broken laptop. Brings you seventeen electrolyte drinks. Lays you on your stomach and fans you with a protein bag. “You need shade,” he says, dragging the blackout curtains shut like a vampire cave dad. Also? Carries you everywhere. Absolutely refuses to let you walk. “You’ll die,” he insists, hoisting you bridal style while sweating more than you.

Hyunjin – delirious romantic who turns heatstroke into a gothic monologue.

You: “Hyun, I think I’m gonna faint.” Hyunjin: “Then collapse in my arms, beloved. Let the heat take you like a tragic poem.” He fans you dramatically with a vintage art magazine. Kisses your temple like he’s blessing you before battle. Also paints ice cubes and places them on your back like cursed little art installations. “You are my masterpiece, even in decay.” Sir. Please. I need a popsicle.

Han Jisung – you’re dying and he thinks it’s hilarious.

“Babe,” he snorts, watching you crawl across the tiles like a corpse, “you look like expired cheese.” Hands you a frozen Capri Sun and says, “Here, hydrate or die-drate.” But then?? He lays on the kitchen floor with you, puts his cold feet on your thighs, and whispers, “I could bite you and cool you down from the inside out… just saying…” You: “That’s not how thermodynamics works—” Him: “Let me be your sexy ice pack.”

Felix – sunshine vampire turned aircon sugar daddy.

He literally BUYS YOU A PORTABLE AC UNIT. Brings you frozen fruit in a crystal bowl. Wears nothing but silk shorts. “Want me to press my cold hands on your chest?” he asks, eyes big and innocent. Spoiler: he does it anyway. Also insists on cuddling because “your heat makes me feel more alive 🥺” You: “Felix I’m gonna die.” Him: “But you’ll die loved and moisturized.”

Seungmin – dry, sarcastic, literally a vampire Yeti.

He’s fine. He’s cold. He looks amazing. “You look like a damp sock,” he says, sipping cold blood. Watches you melt with zero emotion. Then tosses you a frozen towel and goes, “Here. Try not to perish before dinner.” But later? You wake up to him silently pressing popsicles against the back of your knees like some weird vampire ritual. “It’s effective,” he mutters. “Shut up.”

Jeongin – baby vamp who doesn’t know how to help so he just gives you ice and panic.

“You’re melting! Should I bite you?? Will that help?? Should I call someone???” He tries putting you in the bathtub. Forgets to add cold water. Genuinely looks like he might combust until you let him lie on top of you like a human ice blanket. He’s freezing. He smells amazing. You survive. Barely. “Next time,” he murmurs, “we move to Alaska.”

⸺⟡⸺

thank you 🦄 anon for this ✨deliriously sweaty✨ vision. i hope you're still hydrated. and if not—someone call Chan and tell him to fridge you immediately🩸🧊🖤

love ya , use sunscreen 💋🦇

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🍀 ANON LOGGED: “I asked to be bitten nicely and ruined emotionally, is that too much?”

OH 🍀 ANON. OH YOU FERAL, DELECTABLE LUCKY CHARM. you said: “what if I looked into my vampire lover’s eyes and said 'bite me' with my whole chest and my whole throat” and now I’m the one short-circuiting.

⸺⟡⸺

“Vampire!SKZ reacting to you begging to be bitten.”

Bang Chan – The Control Snaps™

You whisper, “Pretty please... bite me?” Voice soft. Neck tilted. Pupils blown. He pauses—completely still—fangs already itching. “You don’t mean that,” he murmurs, voice rough like gravel. But you nod. Eyes wide. Voice smaller now. “I do. I want you to... I need you to.” He’s across the room in a second. Hands in your hair. Breath scorching. He doesn’t ask again. He just sinks in, deep and slow, groaning like he’s starving—because he is. Your blood hits his tongue and his hips stutter into yours. “You have no idea,” he growls, licking over the punctures, “what you just started.”

Lee Know – Silent. Deadly. Feral underneath.

You tug his sleeve. Whine softly. “Bite me?” He stares at you like you’ve just offered to hand him the universe. Eyes black. Still as a statue. Then he hums. Low. Threatening. “You really want it?” he asks, voice low enough to make you shiver. You nod. Bare your neck. Breathe his name. He pins you against the wall in one motion. No words. Just teeth. He bites you with precision. Slowly. Possessively. Fangs drag longer than necessary, just to hear your moan break. “You beg pretty,” he whispers, licking the blood from your skin. “I’ll make you beg again.”

Changbin – Panics. Then destroys you.

Your hands are on his chest. Your voice? Breathless. “Changbin, please. Bite me.” He freezes. Entire system crashes. “Wh–what? You want... me to—?” You nod. Pupils dilated. Clinging to him. His restraint snaps. He groans, low and wrecked, presses his forehead to yours. “Fuck, baby, don’t ask for that if you don’t mean it,” he warns—then bites you mid-sentence. Growls into your throat like it’s the only thing grounding him. Blood rushes into his mouth and so does your moan. You both see stars. After? He holds you like you’re made of glass.

Hyunjin – Gets spiritual about it. Still ruins you.

You crawl into his lap, voice sweet and shaky. “Please... I want you to bite me. Want you to drink from me.” He gasps like you just confessed love. His hand trembles as it cups your jaw. “You’re sure?” he breathes. “You know what this means?” You: “I want to be yours.” His eyes roll back. His fangs drop. He kisses your wrist like a prayer and bites it, gently—like you’re a miracle. Your blood coats his lips like wine and he licks it off slow. Worshipful. He moans your name. “You taste like devotion,” he whispers. “Don’t take that back.”

Han Jisung – Turns insane. Like immediately.

You whisper it in his ear, soft and teasing: “Jisung... will you bite me? Please?” He short-circuits. Like visibly. Falls off the couch. Stares at you like you’re a glitch in his fantasy. “Say it again.” You do. And then you’re pinned to the bed, his fangs grazing your skin, hands shaking. “I’ve been trying to be good,” he whimpers. “But you’re not making it easy.” He bites. Hard. Messy. Breathless. He drinks like it’s the only thing keeping him alive. When he pulls back, your blood on his lips, he’s whispering, “Say it again. Beg again. I’m not done.”

Felix – Sunshine cracks. Fully wrecked.

You brush his curls back. Nuzzle into his cold neck. “Lixie... please bite me. I want to feel you.” His eyes go wide. Like anime protagonist realizing he’s in love. “You... you what?” “I want it,” you whisper. “Want you.” He whimpers. Bites his own lip. Pulls you close like he’s scared you’ll vanish. Then he very gently sinks his fangs in—while whispering, “Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.” His breath hitches. His hips roll against yours. He’s gasping into your neck. “Can’t believe you’d offer yourself to me,” he says between licks, “I’ll never forget this. Never.”

Seungmin – Laughs. Then makes you scream.

You say it casually—like it’s a favoir. “Please bite me, Min. I need it.” He blinks. Smirks. “Oh?” he says. “You need me now?” You nod. His pupils expand instantly. He leans in. “Then ask properly.” You beg again. Sweeter. Desperate. Eyes fluttering. And that’s when he loses it. Bites you like punishment. Like payoff. Drinks slow, precise, with a wicked curl to his mouth. “You asked for this,” he growls, licking the blood off your clavicle. “Hope you’re ready to handle it.” Spoiler: You are not.

Jeongin – Breaks. Rebuilds. Bites again.

You pull him close by the shirt. Whisper, “Please bite me, Innie.” He dies. “Wh–you… are you serious?” You nod. He stares. You whisper it again. “Please, Jeongin.” He leans in, voice shaking: “...Since you asked so sweetly.” But he’s gentle. Tender. He kisses your shoulder. Sinks in slow. And moans. Loud. Choked. Honest. You whimper and he shudders. “You taste like mine,” he whispers. Then he bites again.

⸺⟡⸺

🍀 anon… YOU’VE RUINED THEM. AND ME. thank you for this soft-depraved masterpiece of an ask. i hope you’re happy knowing that 8 powerful vampire men are now feral because you blinked at them and said “bite me.” 💋🦇

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🐚 ANON LOGGED: “Lotus was taken so I embraced the sea and claimed the shell—glub glub bitch.”

you are OFFICIALLY ON THE ROSTER and you are SO powerful for the 🐚 pick—soft ocean mystique meets secret fang-thirst?? YES.

and babyyyyy don’t worry 🥺🩵 i would love to see your Chan fan art if you ever feel ready to share. NO pressure, no face reveal needed, just vibes and glub glub magic.

welcome to the blood ocean, darling shell creature. love u 💋🦇

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if you made it to the end of this ask dump: CONGRATULATIONS YOU ABSOLUTE BEAST. you get a 🪙 GOLD STAR, a shot of vampire venom, and a forehead kiss from your fave.

thank you for the chaos, the thirst, the love, and the INSANE BRAINROT — keep sending asks!! I love them, I hoard them, I read them at 2AM and giggle like a Victorian ghost texting her crush via candlelight.

NOW IF YOU’LL EXCUSE ME… I am off to go write Changbin’s smut fic 🫣💦. and also think about what kind of mental illness I’ll unleash for Filthy Friday tomorrow.

ALSO. watch KPOP HUNTERS on Netflix. SAURRR GOOD. Your Idol and How It’s Done are on loop on my Apple Music.

until next time… Daku loves u 💋🦇

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c0llisiion · 8 months ago

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DAY 23 — YEOSANG

★ npr, f!reader, face sitting , pussydrunk!yeo — lmk if i missed any!!; W/C: 512

Hello! This is part of my kinktober list! Day23 is officially out <3

This is strictly fiction. Any scenario or situation should not be taken seriously. Please refrain from reading if the topics make you uncomfortable.

“Baby… please… It won't hurt me, I promise..." Yeosang reassured you. His hands rubbing up and down your thighs as you cradled his lap.

Yeosang had been begging you for months for you to have your pussy on his face. Lapping at your folds and tasting you in a different way. But you were always unsure and skeptical. You didn’t want to hurt your boyfriend by sitting on his face; what if he suffocates?

“Im not gonna suffocate, sweetheart... Just once, and I will show you how good I can eat you out with you on top of me…” He was slowly guiding you up his body, his eyes half-closed and his mouth in a sleazy smile.

You pout and think about it before hitting his chest. “You better tell me if you feel uncomfortable, alright?”

Yeosang's smile widened, and he was quick to pull your body up. Your crotch hovering over his mouth. His slender fingers pushed down your underwear, exposing your glistening wet pussy.

He took a deep inhale, his mouth watering at the sight.

You carefully adjusted yourself. Holding onto the headboard for stability and your knees on either side of his head. Before you could give a confirmation that you were ready, Yeosang pushed your hips onto his mouth.

His mouth making immediate contact with your clit, sucking and rolling the nub using his tongue.

You gasped out and gripped his hair as he abused your bud with his tongue. His mouth eventually traveled lower to your core. Pushing his tongue into the entrance and licking your arousal.

You moan rather loudly at his sudden action. Your grip on the headboard and his hair tightened as he continued eating you out.

Yeosang hummed in satisfaction against your pussy, the vibrations sending pleasure coursing through your body. Low, breathless curses left your mouth. Yeosangs tongue lapped and sucked you clean, spitting and kissing your hole.

His hands kneaded your ass cheeks, spreading them and playing with flesh.

He grunts as he feels you pressing yourself against his mouth. The pleasure getting so close that you needed more of it.

You heard the grunt and immediately panicked before lifting yourself off his mouth and looking down at him with worry.

“Are you okay?!” You scan his face for any discomfort.

Yeosang clicks his tongue in annoyance and slaps your ass, “did i ask to fucking stop?” He asks sternly.

“N-no..." "Sit back down. Im not done yet.” And with that, he pushed you down once again, but this time making sure to bite down onto your clit softly, making you cry out.

He moaned and groaned against your pussy. His voice vibrating against your folds, making you see stars. “So.. so good…” he started rocking your hips against his mouth. Smothering himself in your essence.

The pleasure was starting to get worse at every step. Your body unconsciously pressing down and gripping his hair tighter.

Yeosang chuckled against your cunt and kissed your entrance. He spoke, his voice slightly muffled. “Told you would like it.”

Tags~ @cassies-cookies @minghaosimp @unlikelysublimekryptonite @mamnaimiefrankie @marcoswhore @theyadorevalerie @applejackthebest515 @un-knew @salemluvsmusic @ka0ila @atztrsr @kpopsmutty69 @jisunglyricist @targaryenluvs @yuminhyunn @chansramennn @anylady-fics @marihoneywk @mikaelless @paboskzfan @lezleeferguson-120 @mylittleponeypinkrosieposie @felixsangelicfreckles @vtyb23

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himezoro · 1 year ago

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roronoa zoro's guide to relationship (smut)

tysm everyone for your love and support on the previous post ! ˚ʚ♡ɞ˚ i'm so sorry for how long this other post was to come, but work has been pretty exhausting and as you may know, i'm a lawyer so when it comes to having free time it gets hard lmao this one was requested by @jinjen, i hope they'll like it ! <3

i'm also working on a "one shot" smut for roronoa zoro that i've had in mind for so long, i hope you'll like it!!

minors dni !! 18+ only.

here's a headcanon of what a relationship with roronoa zoro would include sexually. i had a female partner in mind when writting which is why it's pretty gender based !

wc : 860

even before being in a relationship with roronoa zoro, the sexual tension between his s/o and himself was beyond compare ; his hair would bristle when he heard their voice, when their hands would touch at dinner, when they just entered the room. the tension between them is so high it gets hard to breathe. his eyes would linger on their figure like those of a ruthless predator ready to pounce onto their prey. the sway of their hips, the flips of their hair, the bites of their lips, the look of their doe eyes. everything sets him on.

it became a game for the two of them to play with that said tension before getting official. he's a tease after all. but afterwards? hell, there's just no rules. everything's allowed. from their s/o sensually touching his thigh under the table and tracing the shape of his growing erection when everyone's eating to him whispering the dirtiest things into his s/o's ear when they're just sitting reading in the middle of the kitchen with sanji close by. "how 'bout we give that shitty cook a show of how exquisite ya' juices taste ?" "i bet i can make ya squirt before ya reach the bottom of that stupid page baby.". it's all competition, and it's about who's going to resist the urge to cut the tension.

zoro would easily cut it before they do. hell, he's got three swords ffs.

he's always horny for his partner.

aside from this game, zoro can go from being a slow and passionate lover to a ruthless beast. going from "i wanna make love to you" to "i'm gonna fuck you until your brain goes dumb".

when he's in the mood for passionate sex, zoro would take his time to kiss his s/o endlessly. having them onto their lap, grinding slowly but surely, his hand at the back of their neck in a loving yet firm way. he would whisper sweet nothings he won't say in any other circumstances "you're so goddamn pretty", "i want this body on me forever", "i wanna make ya feel good", "let me please you", "i love you".

during those intimate and slow times, his giant figure would be afraid to break you. his cock would pound into their s/o painfully slowly, missionary style, so he can watch them take him so gracefully. he would leave trails of hickeys all over their chest while firmly holding their hands, moving his hips to the rhythm of their racing heartbeats.

he knows their body like his three swords.

would lick and finger your pussy like there's no tomorrow, until your legs shake while praising you so bad. he would lick all of your fluid and even lick his lips before kissing you to "give ya a taste".

he loves it when his s/o praises him, saying how good he's making them feel, or simply hearing his name in between their moans. he feels like he's the strongest in the world.

but the second zoro feels jealous or "dominant" (which would be more appropriate since he feels pretty confident in his ability to please you), oh boy. be ready for a ride.

he would pin their s/o to the nearest surface. anything remotely close : the floor ? check. the dinner table ? check. the desk in your room ? double check. the wall to the shower ? triple check that one. he would grab their face with his right hand, kissing them hard, watching the trails of saliva connecting them with complete lust before diving back into a sloppy yet quite nice kiss, while playing with his s/o's clothed pussy under their dress with his left hand.

if this makeout session came after a meaningless fight (angry sex), he would spin them hard so their ass was pinned to his clothed erection and smack it hard. "gonna be a good girl now or shall i smack some senses outta ya ?" he can be mean during those sessions, but when he would make up for it later.

he would make them suck his giant cock until he hears them gag, saying "ya can take it. look at me while you swallow it all." he loves receiving a blowjob from their partner, seeing his cock disappear into the depth of their throat.

he's so ridiculously strong. he'll have their s/o fucked in every position. makes them cum so many times his s/o loses count, but not him. he's competitive and keeps his record in check. his stamina is pretty solid too.

even in these times, he cannot help but praise their s/o. "your pussy's squeezing me whole", "you're taking my cock so well, looks like it's made for it".

loves shower/bath sex where he can have fun with his partner at the same time.

sleepy morning sex as well <3

in the end, sex remains a matter of trust and intimacy, so no matter how, be sure to know that afterwards, this boy would not let go of you and ask for a back rub just to keep the intimacy going.

would hate it if someone dared interrupting his peace during aftercare (which can happen since luffy and usopp are always going crazy).

#one piece x reader #op x reader #headcanons #one piece headcanon #one piece headcanons #opla x reader #roronoa zoro #one piece imagine #one piece smut #roronoa zoro smut #zoro x reader #roronoa zoro x reader #roronoa zoro headcanons

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cosmickid-inmotion · 10 months ago

Text

Please, Mr. Miller?

Header by and the fic dedicated to @sweetlummie . Thank you for supporting this series

Dividers by @anitalenia

DBF!Joel x Reader

Join my taglist : Masterlist

Buy Me A Coffee : Kofi : Go Fund Me

First installment is Yes, Mr. Miller? but all parts can be found on my masterlist <3

Summery: Getting ready for the labor day cookout, you reminisce on Labor day last year when things with Joel began. Ft. your dad surprises you

Warnings: Virginity loss, dirty talk, PIV sex, age gap (legal, reader is over 21 so stfu y'all), size kink, bleeding from sex (I know theres been discourse over the whole bleeding your first time, but I bled soooo. It's a normal thing to happen, don't be embarrassed.) Joel is a bit of a pain slut what can I say, reader scratching Joel enough to make him bleed,

Immersivity: Reader is fem, afab, dresses v hyperfem and cutsie, reader is shorter than Joel and coded that Joel is larger, can carry you.

A/N: My last instalment for this series, the dbf holiday fucks series as I call it, caused a whole hoopla. I didn't do memorial day nor forth of july as planned. I wasn't even going to do any more but then I thought of everyone who supported me and of course my dear Lum, and decided to write one more installment. This will wrap up the series with a happy end for our dear horny bastards <3

Everything needed to be perfect. Joel was coming over for the yearly labor day cookout your dad did to celebrate the end of the summer, and oh what a summer it was!! Joel had made this time after gradating college special, spending time taking you out of town so you could both not worry about getting caught. You even had another threesome with him and Tommy, a time that was extra special now that you belonged to Joel officially.

This wouldn't be your anniversary technically. Labor Day always falls on Monday, but your anniversary was the same date of course. You spent the "anniversary" of the first time Joel and you had sex getting fucked into oblivion at Joel's house. Today was still special, because you and him would always remember Labor Day for this.

As you apply your simple make-up, pink eyeshadow and pink blush and pink lipstick to match the dress you brought over to your dads, you think back on that day.

You had been giving Joel 'fuck me' eyes for months. Ever since him and your dad became friends the last year or so, you can't deny how much you wanted him. The barrier, however, was obvious. He was your dads best friend, and then there was the fact you were a virgin.

Still, your record wasn't exactly lily white. You'd fucked around a bit here and there with boys and girls but that was the problem. They were all just like you, inexperienced. Most were boring, most only focused on what they wanted. You need a grown ass man to teach you, to guide you, to make you cum the way your vibrator could.

Joel was that man. So, you spent months sending signals...

Signals that ended up with you pushed up against your bedroom door that fateful Monday while your dad fell asleep on the couch, his body crowding you with his breath hot against your face.

"You think you are awfully cute, don't you little lady?"

You can't help smile at that. Yes, yes you do think you're cute, thank you.

"You just think you can prance around here in these little skirts and lowcut tops and get me hard like a fucking teenager not have any consiquences?"

Despite his words and harsh tone, when Joel's hand went to your hip his grip was light, letting you know you weren't being trapped.

You look up at him. "I know what I'm about, Mr. Miller."

A small smile appears on his face, and he grind his hips against your stomach, making you feel him growing erection. "You feel what you do to me?" He waits until you nod. "I think it's only right you help me take care of it, don't you? Or do I have to fuck my fist in the shower thinking of your face again?"

"No, Mr. Miller, I think I should help you, but... you have to help me with something..." You trail off, uncertain how he'll take the news.

"And what is that?"

"I'm a virgin..."

With this piece of information, Joel's face softens and he gives you a little more space. He seems like a new person, resting his head on your forehead and you see him cringing a bit.

"Shit darl'n, "m sorry. I was come'n in strong for no fucking reasons"

But you don't want him to feel bad for assuming you weren't a virgin, most people aren't by your age... "No, no don't be sorry! I... I liked it." Joel opens his eyes to look at you, your faces so close together. "i like you being dominate."

That smile again... that damn smile and you knew you were in trouble.

"You want this? You can say no, any time..."

"I do. I really fucking do."

With that, Joel kissed you... and oh what a kiss it was. Joel devoured you like this betrayal of his friendship was sending him to death row and you were his request for a last meal. He kissed you like he was willing to sacrifice it all just for your lips, that committing this sin was worth it just to be the first between your legs. He kissed you like you were his already. Joel never stopped kissing you like that, not even a year into the affair.

He took his time with you, just like you knew he would. This, this is why you trusted Joel Miller with this part of yourself. Your vibrator was at your apartment, but Joel made you cum on his lips, humping the mattress with his arms locked around your shaking legs. Then, he opened you up on his fingers, the thick digits easily maneuvering in and out of your drenched pussy before curling them up and dragging another orgasm out of you.

When Joel finally lined himself up between your legs, your pretty dress still on and the skirt flared out at the bed sheets, he tucked his face to your neck, kissing and nipping softly to not leave and marks. "Are you sure you want this, darl'n? We can stop. I promise."

But you didn't want to stop. No part of you wanted to stop.

You grab at his ass, your done up nails gripping his asscheeks. Your body felt on fire, burning for him and only for him. You knew this could never be a one time things, even before he deflowered you, you were his to keep, his to play with. "Please, Mr. Miller?" You begin to beg for him. "I need your cock, please, please, please? I need it so badly, it's all I want, I need you, only you!"

Joel groaned at the honorific, head dropping down at he began to slid into your tight hole, splitting you open. "Shiiiiiiit baby... s'fucking good... so fucking good."

Your grip on his ass tightened as the pain of being stretched peaked, nails digging in and scrapping him, making him bleed for you as you did for him.

When he's fully seated inside you, Joel plants a little kiss on your lips, humming a little in the back of his throat. "My sweet girl... saved herself just for me, huh?"

"Yes" You lie a little. For the bit. "Wanted you to be my first, Mr. Miller."

He groans, slowly pulling out almost all the way. "Love it when you call me that." then, he thrusts himself completely into you, pounding your pussy as the gentle uh, uh, uh's begin to fill the room in time the the pleasure he brings you.

"Shhhhh princess," Joel's nose nuzzles your cheek. "Gotta be quiet, remember? Can't have your daddy finding out you let his friend deflower his little girl, hm?"

You whimper at that, the secrecy, the naughty air adding to the sin happening in your old bedroom as he thrust again and again and again until you're unable to keep quiet anymore. The pleasure is too great, too strong as your orgasm approaches and he knows it. Gentle hand a contrast the the way he cock is rearranging your insides with pound ferver, Joel cups your face and puts his thumb to your lip.

No hesitation, you open your mouth and as soon as his thumb slides inside you lock your lips around him.

"Good girl... good- fuck- good fucking girl... just needed someth'n to keep your mouth busy, huh? Something to suck on? Yeah, I know baby, I know, it's a lot isn't it? It hurts a little, huh?" Joel looks down, watching the way his cock disappears into you, watching how it comes out covered in slick. He likes looking at you writhe under him, struggling to take it all... "Awwww big stretch.... That's it baby, suck on my thumb... harder, want yuh to practice for my cock, because i ain't done with yuh after tonight. You know that, don't you? You're mine, pretty girl. I'm your daddy now."

He can feel you tightening, your cunt beginning to pulse the same it did around his fingers.

"Bite down on my thumb when you cum baby, make it hurt."

You do as you're told, biting down to prevent from screaming as you cum on his cock, waves of pleasure rushing your body like the crash of the ocean on a rock. Not holding bad, you bit him to the bone and watch as his head rolls back as he cums, reveling in the pain as he floods your cunt with his spend. Again and again he fucks his cum inside your pussy, feeling it begin to leak out and down your ass crack before his softening cock finally still inside you.

There is a moment when Joel body falls on your, covering you with a blanket of just him pressed on your dress, that you think he's just going to get up and walk out. Maybe he's wake your dad up to say goodbye and then just not speak to you again now that he got what he wanted...

But he doesn't. Joel kisses you, saying he'll be right back before getting his pants on again and going to the bathroom. He returned to clean you up, calming your embarrassment when you see the blood on the sheets, and holding you until you fell asleep.

That was one year ago.

Today, you skip down the stairs at your dads,m pink dress fluttering around your knees, and hope happily outside to where you dad was grilling. A few people had trickled in, but were talking across the yard.

"Hi dad!" You start surveying the party goers, looking out over the yard. You don't see Joel yet, but Tommy is in the pool already which means Joel is probably stuck carrying in whatever they brought.

"Hi honey!" He greets you warmly. "That a new dress?"

You give a twirl. "Sure is!"

"Looks real nice, I always liked pink on you. I think Joel will like it too."

Your blood runs cold and you freeze. You don't even have it in you to act natural or confused, you just stare at him in shock. You wonder if he's about to start yelling, although that was rarely in his nature.

"I..."

Your dad smiles at you, adding cheese to a few burgers. "Relax, honey, it's fine. I saw your car at Joel's house back in May. Yuh ain't slick." He gives you a wink.

"Oh...." You say dumbly, unsure what else to say. "Are you... mad?"

"I was a little when I first saw it... but mostly because you guys didn't tell me. Then I thought about it and realized you guys were probably nervous. I figured as long as he's treat'n you right, I'm fine." He cocks an eyebrow. "And he's treating you right, ain't he? Just cause he's my friend don't mean I'm choosing his side."

Tears of relief well up in your eyes. "Yeah daddy, he does. He treats me real good."

"TOMMY!" Joel shouts walking up the driveway, carrying several bags and a cooler. "You couldn't help?!"

You and your dad laugh, and when you sniffle he leaves his grill to give you a hug. "Good. I'm glad. I just want you to be happy, and Joel's a good guy. I'm just glad it's not Tommy."

You laugh again at that, and once he's satisfied you're happy, he goes to putting the burgers on a plate.

"So... is it serious? I don't wanna be in your business, just wondering."

You watch Joel set up the snacks and beer he was specifically told not to bring, but because of who Joel is as a person he brought them anyway. He and Tommy help a kid out of the pool, and when Joel looks up he sees you staring at him from over the deck.

He grins at you and waves. You wave back. "Yeah dad. It's very serious."

You run down the steps to tell him you dont have to sneak around anymore.

If you want more joel with fem reader since this series is done and I'm largly leaving pedro characrters, check out @sweetlummie 's work! lots of v fem cute reader, including great plus size!!

Thank you all for your love on this series!!!! the first part went over 1k notes which is huge for me!!!!

I love you all dearly.

althought im not writng pedro characters as much if you are an enjoyer of my writing, check out my tag list! i got rid of it for a while but am bringing it back

thank you!!!

@fandxmslxt69 @runa-falls @k-ra @ahookedheroespureheart @mikaelak @littlenosoul @stevenandmarcslove @pikapuff-316 @del-ightfulling @faretheeoscar @harriedandharassed @my-secret-shame-but-fanfiction @campingwiththecharmings @ramblers-lets-get-ramblin @milly-louise @casa-boiardi @joeldjarin @mrs-oharaxx @pedge-page @readingiskeepingmegoing @survivingandenduring

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the-garbanzo-annex-jr · 9 months ago

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by Seth Mandel

In the summer of 2000, Israeli forces pulled out of South Lebanon, where they had maintained a security buffer between Hezbollah and the Israeli civilians in northern Israel. A few months later, Israel was rewarded for this gesture when Hezbollah ambushed three soldiers on the Israeli side of the border and took them captive.

The Iran-backed terrorists disguised themselves as employees of the United Nations Interim Force in Lebanon (UNIFIL) and attached UN markings to the trucks used in the attack. The next day, UN workers tried to tow away the trucks but were stopped by Hezbollah operatives. The UN workers turned the vehicles over to Hezbollah.

But there was a twist. The UN had videotaped the scene, which was filled with evidence of the previous day’s kidnapping.

What the UN did with that tape is crucial to understanding the UN’s role in Lebanon and in shaping the conflict up to the present. With that tape, the UN did… nothing.

The news this weekend was saturated with coverage of UNIFIL blaming Israel for putting its cardboard peacekeepers in danger while the IDF responds to Hezbollah’s continued attacks. Israel, in turn, exposed the fact that the UN has allowed Hezbollah to construct tunnels and weapons depots under its nose, protecting the terrorists from IDF counterstrikes.

But all of this begins back in 2000, with that videotape.

Israel’s Labor government pleaded with the UN to turn over the recording, which could help Israel in its search for the captives. Time was, as always, of the essence: Every minute that went by put the kidnapped Israelis’ lives in more danger.

Instead of turning over the tape, the UN lied repeatedly by claiming there was no tape. Eventually, scenes from the tape leaked, revealing what everyone knew the entire time: Of course the tape existed. At that point, the UN publicly admitted they’d had the tape all along.

By then, the soldiers were dead. In 2004, Israel would trade hundreds of terrorists in Israeli jails in return for the bodies of the three soldiers.

There was some irony here: The Hezbollah terrorists dressed as UNIFIL and then UNIFIL aided and abetted their getaway and helped ensure the murder of the soldiers. What had started with terrorists impersonating UN members ended with the UN impersonating Hezbollah. The two were on the same team, cooperating in acts of profound evil. It was manifestly unclear where the UN ended and Hezbollah began.

Sound familiar? It should: It’s also the story of UNRWA, the Gaza-based UN agency that has become an adjunct of Hamas. Its members participated in the Oct. 7 attacks last year and even helped hold Israeli hostages. The head of the UNRWA teachers union turned out to be a high-level Hamasnik with ties to Yahya Sinwar, the mastermind of Oct. 7. We even have video of an UNRWA worker dragging away the body of a murdered Israeli alongside a Hamas terrorist. Where does one end and the other begin?

And by the way, the exact date of that Hezbollah kidnapping 24 years ago after which the UN hid the videotape and obstructed Israel’s attempts to get its soldiers back? Oct. 7, 2000.

This pattern would repeat itself throughout UNIFIL’s tenure in South Lebanon. Israel says the time has come for that tenure to end. Over the weekend, Israeli officials guided journalists along the border so they could see for themselves that Hezbollah is stronger with UNIFIL’s presence than without it.

One of those journalists, the Telegraph’s Jotam Confino, posted pictures and video of a UN compound with a lookout tower 100 yards away from a Hezbollah tunnel entrance. To state the obvious: It’s not a hole in the ground. It’s a tunnel, and constructing such a tunnel requires extremely noisy and conspicuous machinery as well as the regular presence of Hezbollah operatives. These tunnels and weapons caches along the border area were built, and are maintained, with the full knowledge of the United Nations—in fact, in full view of the United Nations.

If you approach a UN compound on South Lebanon you are probably standing above a Hezbollah tunnel or bunker. Where does one end and the other begin?

#unifil #hezbollah #lebanon #united nations #un peacekeepers

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mariacallous · 2 months ago

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Sede vacante. The Holy See is vacant.

Pope Francis, the first Latin American pontiff in history, died at age 88 on Monday at his residence in Vatican City. Born Jorge Mario Bergoglio in Argentina, he led the Catholic Church for 12 years.

Francis was hospitalized for 38 days in February for double pneumonia. His doctors later revealed that he had had two close brushes with death. Francis was discharged from the hospital a month ago and had made several public appearances since. Most notably, he attended the Vatican’s celebrations on Easter Sunday. “Dear brothers and sisters, Happy Easter,” Francis told the crowds, before being driven across St. Peter’s Square on the popemobile, waving at the faithful. In hindsight, it was a fitting send-off for a pontiff who had become the people’s pope.

At times like these, the ways of the Vatican can appear mysterious. What happens after a pope dies? Who governs the Holy See? And how is a pope elected? Most non-Catholics are probably trying to remember the plot of the 2024 movie Conclave right now.

All eyes are now on the camerlengo, or chamberlain, Cardinal Kevin Joseph Farrell. He will run the Holy See until a new Holy Father is elected. No time is wasted after the pope dies. His body is quickly embalmed and then put on display for three days in St. Peter’s Basilica in Vatican City.

Next comes the funeral, which also takes place in St. Peter’s Basilica or, if the weather permits, just outside, on St. Peter’s Square. The dean of the College of Cardinals always presides over the ceremony. Giovanni Battista Re, the current dean, has served in the Curia since the 1960s. If anyone knows how to compose a homily, it’s a man who has seen the deaths of multiple popes.

Since the beginning of the 20th century, popes have been buried in the ornate grottoes beneath St. Peter’s Basilica. But, in 2023, Francis decided to break with protocol. He will be interred in St. Mary Major, a basilica in the center of Rome, because of his “great devotion” to the Virgin Mary.

Although the official mourning period for the pope lasts nine days, the process for selecting a successor starts as soon as he has drawn his last breath. As the Italian proverb goes, morto un papa, se ne fa un altro. When a pope dies, another is made. In other words, not even the vicar of Christ is irreplaceable.

The new pope is chosen by conclave, the papal election dramatized in the hit film. It occurs roughly two weeks after the pope’s funeral. Only cardinals under the age of 80 can take part in it. This means that, out of a current total of 252 cardinals, 138 will pick the next leader of the Catholic Church—a global institution with more than 400,000 clergy members and 1.3 billion lay Catholics.

The conclave occurs in the Sistine Chapel, beneath a ceiling painted by Michelangelo. The doors are locked, and the cardinal electors can have no contact with the outside world. During this time, they are supposed to let the Holy Spirit guide their decision. Concretely speaking, it works like this: Cardinals are given a piece of paper with a header in Latin that reads simply, “I elect as supreme pontiff,” and they write down the name of their chosen candidate below.

To win, a candidate must secure a two-thirds majority. Until that happens, voting continues. Only one round is held on the first day of the conclave, but after that, up to four rounds can take place each day.

While the conclave is à huis clos, the outside world watches closely. The cardinals have only one way to communicate their progress: a chimney on St. Peter’s Square, connected to the Sistine Chapel. When a vote is inconclusive, the cardinals burn the ballots. In a separate furnace, they add chemicals to produce black smoke. When a pope has been elected, they burn the ballots one last time; this time, the smoke turns white. Habemus papam.

Conclaves vary in length. In 2013, Francis was elected after only 24 hours. By comparison, it took cardinals five days and 14 rounds to choose Pius XI in 1922.

Though the conclave is the final act in “making” a pope, what happens before matters, too. In the days leading up to it, the dean of the College of Cardinals convenes general congregations. All the cardinals, regardless of their age, take part. General congregations provide an opportunity to discuss the direction of the church and the qualities that the next pope should have.

The whole process is akin to politics, just swap the dark suits for bright red soutanes. “If history teaches us anything about papal conclaves, it is that the Holy Spirit is far from the only influence at play,” said Jessica Wärnberg, a historian who has conducted extensive research in Vatican archives and written a book on Rome and the popes, titled City of Echoes. She added that it has always been political. “Historically, major political powers, such as France and Spain, worked hard to sway voting. Today, factions are shaped along more ideological lines.”

But campaigning for the papacy is nothing like campaigning in a liberal democracy. For one, it’s very hush-hush. There are no leaflets or campaign ads. For another, cardinals eyeing the papacy are never open about their ambitions. Instead, they rely on allies to quietly drum up support. Subtlety is the mot d’ordre.

That’s not to say Vatican politicking isn’t ruthless. Think Game of Thrones but without the bloodshed. Various factions in the church push their champion. But if he isn’t able to garner enough support, a champion is ditched without mercy, no matter how preeminent he might be.

And, just as in Game of Thrones, it isn’t immediately clear who will win in the end. This is especially true of the upcoming conclave. “All bets are off when it comes to predicting who will succeed Francis,” said Philip Shenon, a former investigative reporter at the New York Times and the author of Jesus Wept, a new book on the modern church. “There’s no obvious front-runner.”

One reason why is that Francis completely overhauled the College of Cardinals. He appointed 110 out of the 138 cardinals who will vote in the conclave. That’s nearly 80 percent. The catch: Many of them come from far-flung corners of the world. They have spent little time together and therefore barely know one another.

Who wins is thus anyone’s guess. “It might be somebody very exotic, since many cardinals are from the other side of the world,” said Frédéric Martel, the author of In the Closet of the Vatican, an investigation into homosexuality in the church that draws on 1,500 interviews, including with prelates. “In fact, it might be a big surprise,” Martel added, “since nobody will have known of the sociology of the new conclave!”

This hasn’t stopped all of Rome from buzzing about the papabili, or the “pope-able.” For Martin Palmer, the CEO of FaithInvest, an NGO that works closely with the church, and a member of the Vatican COVID-19 Commission, the next pontiff will come from one of two factions within the church: He will belong either to “the right wing” in the United States and Africa or to the more liberal “Francis appointments” in Asia and Africa.

On the right, Palmer identifies Robert Sarah, a 79-year-old cardinal from Guinea, as a papabile. Sarah has long been in the mix to succeed Francis. A former prefect of the Dicastery for Divine Worship and the Discipline of the Sacraments, the Vatican department overseeing the Latin Church’s liturgy, he is the anti-Francis candidate.

A traditionalist heavyweight who doesn’t pull his punches, Sarah has echoed the white-nationalist Great Replacement conspiracy theory. Europe, he said in 2019, is at risk of being “invaded by foreigners, just as Rome has been invaded by barbarians.” As he sees it, the continent is locked in an existential battle with the Islamic faith. “If Europe disappears, and with it the priceless value of the Old Continent, Islam will invade the world, and we will completely change culture, anthropology, and moral vision.”

Without surprise, Sarah takes a hard line on homosexuality. He has slammed Francis’s decision to allow same-sex couples to receive sacraments. And he has likened “homosexual and abortion ideologies” to “Nazi-Fascism and communism.”

Another conservative contender, Palmer said, is Raymond Burke, a 76-year-old cardinal from the United States. Best known for his love of the cappa magna, Burke is as outspoken in his statements as in his fashion choices. He has repeatedly criticized Francis—so much so that the pope took away his subsidized Vatican apartment. The American papabile has close ties to the Make America Great Again movement. For many years, he was an ally of Steve Bannon until the two fell out. Still, Burke remains a power player in U.S. conservative Catholic circles.

In the age of Trump, however, that may be a liability. Palmer, who was recently at the Vatican, said that “the negative impact of Trump around the world has significantly cast a cloud over right-wing American rhetoric. Burke and by implication Sarah are seen as tainted by their association with Trump-style politics.”

As a consequence, a staunch conservative like Sarah or Burke may not have the numbers to win. “Sarah and Burke have zero chance—or as many chances as Trump to win the Eurovision,” Martel quipped. “They are ultra-right-wing and ultra-marginal figures. It’s a joke!”

Shenon put it more diplomatically. “Well, conservatives could try, and they probably will,” he said. “But when the doors to the Sistine Chapel are bolted shut, there just aren’t that many of them in the College of Cardinals—at least not enough of the rock-ribbed archconservatives who would vote for a candidate who would reverse Francis’s legacy.”

The next pontiff, Shenon predicts, will at least maintain some degree of continuity with Francis. “Whatever happens, it’s fair to assume that the next pope will not have a dramatically different vision of the church’s future,” Shenon said. He believes that the cardinal electors appointed by Francis “doubtless feel great loyalty to Francis’s progressive legacy.”

Among them, Shenon identifies Cardinal Pietro Parolin—the Holy See’s secretary of state since 2013—as an “obvious candidate.” The 70-year-old Italian prelate would respect the late pope’s agenda. He has said Francis’s reforms were “the action of the Spirit, [so] there can be no U-turn.” If the cardinal electors are looking for a safe pair of hands, someone who knows the Curia and can safeguard Francis’s achievements, then Parolin is their man.

In a similar vein, Martel points to Cardinal Matteo Zuppi, the 69-year-old archbishop of Bologna. Zuppi has Francis’s trust. Crucially, as the head of the Italian Episcopal Conference, he’s also popular with many prelates.

But if they want a bolder choice, then cardinal electors could go for the Ghanaian Cardinal Peter Turkson. The 76-year-old is the chancellor of the Pontifical Academy of Sciences and Social Sciences. He has long been ranked as a papabile, even though his star has dimmed after he fell out with Francis. But don’t count him out, said Palmer, who has worked with Turkson and thinks that “he really speaks for the engaged African Church.”

Palmer also thinks that Cardinal Luis Tagle, the former archbishop of Manila, has a serious chance. Hailed as the “Asian Francis,” Tagle is a progressive. He backed Francis in his drive to protect the environment and his plans for a more inclusive church. “My vision for a synodal church is a church that rediscovers this wonderful gift of the Spirit given to the whole church in Vatican II,” Tagle said in 2023, referring to the Second Vatican Council, which modernized the church in the 1960s and has been attacked by conservatives ever since.

The Filipino prelate has also taken a more compassionate approach to doctrinal matters, deploring the “harsh words that were used in the past to refer to gays and divorced and separated people, the unwed mothers, etc.”

At 67, Tagle is young by papal standards. Francis was elected at 76, Benedict XVI at 78. If he does become pope, then he would have the time to enact sweeping reforms. “In recent years, Francis has seemed pretty convinced his agenda—and the spirit of Vatican II—will survive his papacy,” Shenon said, “which is why he keeps insisting with a smile that his successor will call himself John XXIV.” John XXIII was the pope who initiated Vatican II. Tagle could well be the kind of successor Francis envisioned—perhaps even taking the name John XXIV.

If neither conservative nor liberal factions manage to win enough support among the cardinal electors, then a compromise candidate may emerge. “Historically speaking, divided conclaves have often favored ostensibly neutral candidates,” Wärnberg said. “A papabile with a lower public profile, such as the careful and erudite Cardinal Peter Erdo of Hungary or the reserved and pragmatic Cardinal Anders Arborelius of Sweden, could, therefore, emerge.”

In recent months, another ostensibly neutral prelate has shot up to the top of the papabili list: Cardinal Pierbattista Pizzaballa, the Latin patriarch of Jerusalem. He’s Italian but has spent most of his career in Israel. This means that he isn’t associated with the Curia and remains something of a blank slate.

On many key issues, Pizzaballa has kept his cards close to his chest. And when he hasn’t, he has sent signals to both liberals and conservatives. With liberals, for instance, he backed Laudato Si, Francis’s 2015 encyclical on environmental justice. But Pizzaballa is also open to the Latin Mass, prized by conservatives. “The cardinal is very meticulous in liturgical celebration and has no problem with the traditional Mass,” David Neuhaus, a former patriarchal vicar for Hebrew-speaking Catholics in the Latin Patriarchate of Jerusalem, told National Catholic Register.

Despite being only 59, Pizzaballa has plenty of political experience. In 2014, he orchestrated the “peace prayer” in the Vatican Gardens, a landmark summit between Francis, then-Israeli President Shimon Peres, and Palestinian President Mahmoud Abbas. Similarly, Pizzaballa has tried to strike a measured tone over the Gaza war, talking both about the horrors of the Oct. 7, 2023, massacres and the suffering of the Palestinian people.

Another compromise candidate could be the Canadian Cardinal Michael Czerny. “If the conclave is looking for a safe caretaker pope to ease the transition from the dynamism of Francis, Cardinal Czerny, the cardinal at the head of the Dicastery for Promoting Integral Human Development, is also a possibility. Quiet, efficient, and running the Laudato Si Dicastery, it is his dicastery that will guide that most radical of encyclicals,” Palmer said. “But don’t expect the church to be quite so on message about climate or the environment post-Francis.”

Conclaves aren’t an exact science. With a few exceptions, they are notoriously difficult to predict. The papabili seldom get to sit on the throne of St. Peter. The Italians have a proverb to that effect. Chi entra papa in conclave, ne esce cardinale. He who enters the conclave as pope leaves it as cardinal.

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