#(to conquer and resolve obviously)

[incomingalbatross]

Concepts for Gravity Falls "Next Summer" ideas if I forced myself to let conflict exist in their lives post-canon (<- I'm bad at this)

Mabel gets a new anomaly-boyfriend and spends a significant amount of time keeping him a secret, because everyone in her family is overprotective and none of them have a good sense of boundaries anymore. ("ESPECIALLY you, Grunkles")

Related: Stan and Ford have gotten so good at enabling each other's chaos that Dipper feels the need to yell at them at some point. Jury's out on whether this resolves the situation or spirals into them Proving Themselves to the kids.

Very stupid issue where Stan and Dipper independently realize they've gotten in a pattern of only spending one-on-one time with their OTHER twins, but each assumes this means the other person doesn't want to spend time with them and just gets mopey and standoffish instead of fixing the problem. Ford and Mabel have to stage an intervention.

It's Father's Day! Time for Soos and Stan to tiptoe around their insecurities because they both have new family now and someone here is going to have to decide if that changes their relationship. (Spoiler: it does not, obviously.)

New and Reformed Gideon tries to insert himself into Ford and Dipper's nerd adventures and form a trio. He says his motives are pure, but everyone is very uncomfortable about this.

Pacifica is sort of half-friends with Candy and Grenda, and Mabel has to decide whether to try and fully incorporate her into their dynamic or not. (Pacifica's not even sure which she wants, which complicates things.)

Half the summer is spent prepping for Soos and Melody's wedding and this gives EVERYONE recurring stress.

Not an interpersonal problems, but: The basement turns out to be SLIGHTLY haunted by the miasma of Stan and Ford's accumulated Bad Feelings experienced down there. The family has to brainstorm methods for banishing Vibes.

[hunybody]

the thing about the 'eddie (like a liar) tells buck he USED TO be in love with him' scheme we had going on last night is that eddie convinces himself it's good, actually, for him to get it out. even though he's lying. it's sort of like manifestation or medieval bloodletting and he's just forced to talk about his feelings to buck, because buck is unhinged and keeps bringing it up.

and the other interesting thing about it is that it is, genuinely, buck's own unique torment nexus.

eddie runs the torture gamut every season but especially in season seven, where he realized the two people he loves most in the world (buck and chris) could be snatched away at any moment. and, worse, snatched away by people who could, theoretically, treat them better (even though we the audience knows this isn't true).

so i really just think it's a fun change of pace for buck to be the one in a sisyphean torture labyrinth. he is trying every moment to prove to eddie that he is still lovable, which is BUCK'S worst fear come to life. and obviously like we said this plot resolves with them conquering their fears and realizing, no, buck wasn't going to leave eddie, he could never, and of course eddie could never stop loving buck. but in the middle.... in the middle it does get a bit evil

[marmota-b]

Regarding Boromir, his death scene, and redemption / repentance (book vs film)

A bit of a callback to my original post on the topic of redemption, and inspired by a post calling (correctly) Boromir's trying to take the Ring one moment of weakness. I think I've finally figured out (I was low-key aware of it, but never put it into so many words) why I like the book version of Boromir's last moments much more than the film version, and why it pains me the film version seems to be what so many people prefer and so many fic writers inevitably reach for.

"I tried to take the Ring from Frodo. I am sorry. I have paid." ... "Farewell, Aragorn! Go to Minas Tirith and save my people! I have failed." "No!" said Aragorn, taking his hand and kissing his brow. "You have conquered. Few have gained such a victory. Be at peace! Minas Tirith shall not fail!"

Emphases mine, obviously, but when I think about it it's quite telling in which order they tell each other the things they say, and of course how exactly they say them.

The most important thing here, though it is on both their minds and it is what connects them and what their personal motivation is, isn't Gondor. Yes, Boromir is very worried about the fate of his country, but the first thing he tells Aragorn is what he has done, and that he is sorry.

And the very first thing Aragorn tells Boromir is assure him that he did not fail.

It's not a question of warrior honour, the way the film states it ("You fought bravely. You kept your honour."). It's a question of the main conflict of the book, that between the Ring's temptations and the ability to see it as the evil artifact it is.

The film keeps framing a lineage / authority / responsibility conflict between Boromir and Aragorn that's finally resolved, but that's not at all the conflict that matters (or, really, even exists) here. What Boromir is actually saying in relation to Gondor is "I now recognise that what I tried to do to save my people would have actually doomed them, and I recognise you have indeed been much wiser in this than I from the start. Please keep doing that, I can't change what I did now because I'm about to die." And some of it is present in the film, definitely, but it's muddled with the whole issue of both Aragorn and Boromir questioning Aragorn's legitimacy. Which means in the film Boromir's death scene ends up serving us Boromir repenting his behaviour towards Aragorn and... I hope we can all agree that's actually not the point Tolkien was making with Boromir's death scene in the book.

One moment of weakness. Boromir immediately saw that what he had done was wrong, and tried to make amends the only way he could at the moment. He did not keep trying to pursue Frodo, except to apologise (which admittedly Aragorn does not know, but it's still inherent in what Boromir tells him here). Boromir let go of the Ring even after being very, very sorely tempted, and Aragorn can see that. That IS a huge victory. THAT is a huge victory.

And the film frames that main conflict as it played out in the breaking of the Fellowship... wrong. The film leaves us with Boromir the man who succumbed to temptation, and died for his sins, and Aragorn the man who did not succumb and lived, and Boromir submits to the latter. That's not what happens in the book. In the book Aragorn simply never really went through a full moment of culmination of long-term temptation like that. Aragorn recognised and respected Boromir as someone who had reached the moment of culmination of long-term temptation, succumbed, and saw the light anyway. Meanwhile Boromir thinks he's paying for his sin and basically doomed, so Aragorn assures him that no, it was just a moment of weakness and he has overcome it. (Oh, and what also happens in the book is that after a long period of temptation even Frodo succumbs, and lives.)

My main problem with the film version is that the films inadvertently downplayed the main conflict and main theme of the whole story and served up the wrong moral.

[rainbowswirlything]

I believe the "Corrupted Altador" plot teaser poster was the second-to-last of the "corrupted land" posters, with Faerieland being the last--and I think this could support the idea of the Darkest Faerie being the source of the red lipstick on one of the Mysterious Chalices.

It makes sense for Faerieland to be the final stop; the Artificer was a former resident of Faerieland with a particular axe to grind with her ex Queen Fyora, so it could be either a case of saving the best (from the Artificer's perspective) for last or a way of drawing out Fyora's suffering before her final (Artificer-planned) defeat.

Altador isn't especially close to Faerieland; it's across an entire mountain range. But having Altador be the second-to-last stop would make a lot of sense if the Darkest Faerie is involved.

The giant Void-rift-in-the-sky is clearly visible from the Hall of Heroes--and probably from most of the city. Any time the citizens look up, they're reminded of the looming threat--a threat none of the leaders of Neopia, including their own beloved Council, seem to be making any significant progress in resolving so far.

Surely, anyone who could save them from such a threat would be praised as the greatest of heroes--heaped with laurels and accolades.

Even if that someone had once been banished--even if that someone had once herself been considered the greatest threat to Altador.

Perhaps the Darkest Faerie made a deal with the Artificer-- "I'll work with you on two conditions--one, help me deal with this ring draining my lifeforce and magic; two, don't touch Altador--let me 'save' it."

In the on-site Altador Plot, the Darkest Faerie planned to alter the memories of the city's history so that everyone would remember her as the sole founder of Altador. She doesn't just want to conquer the city--she wants to be seen as its rightful ruler, not merely its conqueror.

Perhaps she thinks that, if she paints herself as the savior of the city, the lone island of color in a greyed-out Neopia, all her past crimes will be absolved in the eyes of Altador's people--and, more than that, as the one person who managed to save Altador from the Grey Curse, she'll be naturally seen as the one most fit to rule it, letting her take her long-dreamed-of place on Altador's throne at last.

(She could finally go home...)

If this is the case, of course, it's obviously not going to go according to plan; the Artificer is most likely going to betray the Darkest Faerie as soon as the Darkest Faerie is no longer of use to her plan--an irony which the Betrayer will probably not appreciate.

[maxilsmaster]

au where eggman adopts sonic

now i know what you’re thinking, “there are already sonic villain aus out there”, but i’m here to tell you, this ain’t no sonic villain au! sonic is still a hero here! the difference is backstory.

the tl;dr is that eggman adopts sonic and tails but they’re not evil and he is, but he’s a good dad anyway

eggman finds little baby sonic (by baby, i mean somewhere in the 4-7 range) all alone on christmas island. the hedgehog doesn’t speak, when asked if he has a family all he does is shake is head, he’s quite obviously abandoned. so eggman adopts this little blue hedgehog! he learns sign language, teaches it to sonic, puts his kid in school, and overall is actually a really good parent. but there is one problem: he’s still evil. he still wants to conquer the planet. sonic disagrees with this. when he fails to convince his dad through words, he ends up taking action and destroying robots. eggdad is not pleased by this, but he supposes that it was inevitable that his kid might not turn out to be evil like him. he still continues his schemes of course, but sonic also continues to stop him. eggman does make sure to program his robots to not target sonic, too.

at some point, eggy creates metal to be an artificial brother for sonic. metal matches sonic’s speed, and is also mute. sonic is overjoyed at his new brother :)

and then he meets tails. the two immediately take a liking to each other, and sonic learns that tails’ situation is similar to how his own used to be. immediately sonic takes tails to eggy and demands he adopt the fox. eggdad accepts and now there are three brothers :)

at some point, sonic and tails arrive on angel island. sonic gets the emeralds punched out of him by knuckles, who has NOT met eggman and just doesn’t like intruders. when eggman learns about this, he’s pissed and steals the master emerald. after this whole situation is resolved, sonic tries to get eggman to adopt knuckles, but knux won’t allow it, so he’s an unofficial brother

at around 12 years old, sonic starts speaking verbally (though in periods of excitement or stress he’ll still go back to sign) (this is just how i headcanon sonic normally but it’s still relevant)

i have the plots written down for a lot of the games, so i’m gonna go through the mainline modern ones briefly

sonic adventure: eggman tries to keep chaos out of sonic’s way, fails miserably

sonic adventure 2 is a fun one! the beginning is mostly the same, eggman finds shadow, sonic gets arrested, etc, but then eggman finds out sonic got arrested and is PISSED, so he has shadow rescue sonic. sonic is pissed about the false arrest and fights shadow, shadow is forced to use chaos control to bring sonic to eggdad before the island explodes, and now sonic is with the dark story for the rest of the plot. eggdad brings sonic to space, tails, knux and amy follow, sonic learns shadow is technically his (uncle? second cousin once removed? it’s one of them, idk which), sonic is NOT launched off the ark bc eggy wouldn’t do that to his son. plot happens, shadow “dies”, and adventure 2 is done!

at some point, eggy finds shadow, and sonic and tails are aware of this. they don’t tell anyone shadow is alive though (and eggman doesn’t tell them about the androids)

sonic heroes happens bc metal thinks he’s better at being evil than eggman, now everyone knows shadow is alive yay, and also sonic and tails are immediately sus of this plan

rush happens too but i don’t know enough about rush to accurately change the plot, but i’m sure the plot changes at least a bit

we’re not gonna talk about 06 bc it gets retconned by itself

unleashed has shadow as the protag instead of sonic

colors is almost entirely unchanged except 1, yacker gets hypnotized in the one cutscene instead of tails, and 2, eggdad did his best to make the amusement park enjoyable for his kids :)

generations! hoo boy! eggman doesn’t get invited to the birthday party (it’s his birthday too) so he causes Issues! oh and shadow gens happens lol

lost world… oh boy. this one is traumatic for everyone involved. there’s less arguing involved, but sonic is still an impulsive dumbass (leading to tails getting kidnapped, which traumatizes sonic and eggdad) and eggy presumably falling to a fiery death (only sonic is around to see this). so sonic is having a Terrible Horrible No Good Very Bad Day all around, and the zeti are also trying extra hard to kill him to spite eggface. luckily it all works out, except that therapy Will Be Required

forces is another fun one! for me ofc, not the characters. infinite betrays eggman early on, locking him up, then also defeats sonic, locking him up too. bc i am merciful, i am reducing the time the war takes down to one month (mainly bc really, that’s more than enough time for everything to go to shit). sonic and eggman are NOT tortured (bc that was just a weird translation thing), but more therapy will def be required. also rookie/gadget saves both sonic and eggman

at some point, eggdad creates sage. he does not intend for sage to become his daughter. but also sonic and tails both know sage from the start, which is relevant for this next bit

frontiers happens next, and really, the main issue is that sage Refuses To Properly Communicate With Sonic. eggy doesn’t want to put his kids in danger so he tells sage not to run any simulations where that happens. in the end though, sonic still has to get involved. and also now there is a Sister :)

tmosth also happens because i fucking love tmosth. the train is sentient which is why sonic gets knocked out

will add some links to character descs and stuff when i post more about this au (and i’ll also try to come up with a name while i do that)

[beevean]

@hypermascbishounen hope you don't mind if I save these comments because you explained very well one of the core, yet subtle issues with NFCV

I'm thinking now of all the interpersonal conflicts in NFCV; and they're all... lacking.

Dracula vs. the Church: the Bishop dies at the end of Blue Fangs. Indirectly, Dracula got his revenge, but obviously this amounts to little since Dracula is furious at mankind and the Bishop was ultimately small potatoes.

Trevor vs. Alucard: the idea is that they're rivals and foils in true CV fashion. The reality is that Alucard is a dry cunt to Trevor for petty reasons like "wah the vampire hunters hunt vampires :(" or "I'm insecure that I made the right choice :(". Anyway, this is resolved by the two fighting Dracula together, then Alucard is ditched until the end. Riveting.

Alucard vs. Dracula: as pointed out in the past, Alucard feels less heartbroken over having to kill his only remaining parent, and more displeased that the Science Man was pushed to be evil. I don't care if Dracula cries that he's killing his boy because we aren't even granted one flashback to flesh out their relationship.

Dracula vs. everyone: he's depressed and apathetic. If he doesn't give a shit, why should we?

Bonus: Dracula has no personal connection to the Belmonts. Trevor isn't even the one who kills him.

Hector vs. Isaac and Dracula: what relationship? They sit around calling him the R-slur, and he has no idea that they resent him so much. He himself only remembers Isaac exists when he needs him. Isaac has very little reason to hate Hector after Dracula's death, since Carmilla, Dracula and he did way more damage. (this makes their reconciliation in S4 hollow and forced)

Hector vs. Carmilla: unresolved. Lenore replaces her in S3, and Hector barely contributes to the final battle against Carmilla - he stays behind to coddle Lenore. Carmilla herself only sees Hector as a defective tool, and is barely concerned about him stalling.

Isaac vs. the Magician: who gives a shit? The Magician is nothing more than a deus ex machina to give Isaac what he wants.

Trepha vs. the cult that wants to resurrect Dracula: this one's a decent conflict, although the cult is more of an obstacle obviously.

Alucard vs. the twins: the relationship is superficially nice, but the betrayal comes so out of nowhere that it really feels like shock value. The indication that he would have fallen into misanthropy due to the trauma goes unresolved, he got better offscreen.

Hector vs. Lenore: as I said, Hector has no reason to oppose Lenore since he has no moral qualms about working for vampires and she would have given him what he wanted. She still tricks him for shock/humiliation purposes. The betrayal has no fallout whatsoever, the two become besties like nothing happened. Even Lenore's suicide comes out of nowhere, she expresses the desire with no gravitas, and he let her die with barely any torment.

Lenore vs. the Council: kind of? I am very generous in interpreting Lenore resorting to raping Hector because she feels insecure in her methods. She whines a lot about feeling sidelined in S4, but we see very little of it. Carmilla yells at her a bit, and she immediately spirals into "she lied to meeee :<". The two are actually excellent foils when it comes to their methods and objectives, but they don't butt heads about it.

Isaac vs. Carmilla: in theory they should have a personal reason to fight, since Carmilla was the one who eventually lead to Dracula's death. But the fight takes place after Isaac let go of Dracula, and is now simply playing hero stopping the villain from conquering the world. She, naturally, doesn't give a shit about him since the dude has the presence of a log in S2.

Trevor vs. Death: again, Death at this point is more of an obstacle than someone who matters personally to Trevor.

since you mentioned game Richter and his conflict with his family legacy: hey you know how Trevor has trauma over his family being killed when he was a kid because considered enemies of the Church? No? That's okay, the show didn't either, he finished his arc in S1 and that's it :D

To this, add another complaint I had, that friendships and romantic relationships are all banter (some of it even rather mean), no warmth.

It really is pathetic when compared to the gripping, interwoven relationships in the games. Juste and Maxim, Hector and Isaac, Shanoa and Albus, even Leon and Mathias for what little we see of them, they would all eat this for breakfast. The show pretends to be moved by characters, but honestly, it feels more moved by dialogue, which is very different.

(Nocturne is a little better. While Sun Thundercat is a pathetic villain and giving Richter the dead mom trauma is lazy as hell, at least we have more interpersonal conflicts: Richter vs. Olrox, Maria vs. the Abbot, Tera vs. Sun Thundercat, Annette vs. Vaublanc. The characters themselves are very paper thin, though)

[the-eeveekins]

The Witch From Mercury: Tying Up Loose Ends

A look at the state of different characters, organizations and plot points after the epilogue of The Witch From Mercury.

Earth vs. Space, and Earthian Inequality

The crux of this conflict was the growing inequality between Earthians and Spacians, and that Spacians were exploiting Earthian labour and resources for their gain, while also pitting them in proxy wars. When Miorine dissolved the Benerit Group, all their assets were placed into Earthian hands, including all the resources the plundered from Earth and presumably a number of weapons. With this, the main driving force of the conflict is resolved, although tensions very likely still linger, especially among those who lost family and friends to the Benerit Group.

While it may not be a perfect long-term solution, it has definitely helped in the short-term. Gund-Arm Inc. has survived the transfer and we see Miorine working with Earthian protesters to solve lingering issues. And we even see that Sedo is now getting an education. Clearly, Miorine’s actions havehad a positive affect on Earthian lives. Suletta & Miorine changed the status quo in a far greater way for the better than many Gundam main characters manage to do in their own worlds.

The Benerit Group

The Benerit Group was dissolved, and all of the political and military might it wielded as an entity was destroyed. Obviously many members of the group found ways to continue working, and many will have had some assets stashed away not attached to the group, but they would lack the combined strength that the group wielding before.

We see that Delling and Sarius are under investigation in the epilogue, so even if they're still free as of the epilogue, they may not be so for very long. And for Delling, who formed the Benerit Group as a means to enforce a tyrannical "peace" upon the world, his life's work was destroyed by his daughter, and all the power that came with it.

We do see the Peil Ladies, who seem to have slinked away to some sort of retirement home in the aftermath of events. While some see this as a good ending for them, keep in mind they had just double crossed the BG in a play to be the next major power in the business world after the SAL wiped them out. Instead, they were left with nothing. No power, no super company. You can see how miserable they look in the epilogue.

The children of the Benerit Group all seem to have found a future, one way or another. Gund-Arm Incorporated is still around, with all it's Earthian and Spacian employees. Elan, Secelia and Guel are still kicking and running their own businesses, though it's unclear if they found positions with the new owners of their old companies or started over.

GUND Technology

The Prologue started with showing GUND as a means for humanity to travel into space, as well as conquering various other physical disabilities. The work of the Vanadis Institute is now continued by GUND-Arm Incorporated, which we see in the epilogue is producing medical technology to aid those with disabilities, like Petra and Ericht.

Shaddiq

I have talked about this a lot in the past, but Shaddiq doesn't have a bad ending. His goal was to dissolve the Benerit Group and transfer their assests to Earth to balance the powers, and Miorine successfully achieved his goal for him. Sabina and company came away from everything with their freedom and now work to better Earth. And as a cherry on top, since Shaddiq was already under arrest for Plant Quetta and Asticassia, he also took the fall for Quiet Zero as well, to protect Miorine’s new family.

Mercury & The School

We don't actually see Mercury in the series itself (except in a flashback of the Lfrith hanger), but we don't really need to. The planet itself doesn't have any relevance to events, and Cradle Planet (which does take place on Mercury) makes it pretty clear there isn't anything of interest out there anyway. And while Suletta is from there and wants to build a school there, she never once expressed a desire to return. We can pretty safely say that Suletta built her school there, based on the line "You're going to build another school here?"

Lingering Questions

The Space Assembly League

Quiet Zero not only shook up things in space due to the dissolution of the Benerit Group, but also the revelation that the SAL was directly supporting Earthian resistance groups and helping them carry out attacks against their own citizens, not to mention very publicly trying to wipe out millions of it's own citizens with a giant space laser. Presumably this caused a massive shake-up within the SAL, and between that and the Benerit Group dissolution, the entire political structure of space very likely changed significantly, but the epilogue doesn't really give much of a hint about what that looks like.

The Lfrith AI

A plot thread in the Prologue that completely disappeared afterwards. While I'm not personally convinced it was ever meant to be a plot point beyond the Prologue, I was convinced it was worth bringing up. It was meant to overcome the Gundam Curse and allow people to pilot Gundams without negative permet damage. However, by all accounts, it never succeeded. The show very heavily implies that Ericht's unique ability to coexist with the Data Storm is what allows her to connect to the AI and pilot a Gundam without harm, and it's never brought up again. Not to mention the Darilbalde used a new advanced AI that could pilot a mobile suit with pilot input at all, but not even that was seen as a solution to the Curse for the Schwarzette.

Elnora and the Covern

We know Suletta was the key. It was necessary for someone to pilot Aerial because Ericht couldn't. Whether it was Ericht's permet resistance that Elnore needed, or maybe just a close bond family bond to push permet scores, the solution she found was to clone her own daughter. Through context we might assume this isn't exactly unheard of in Ad Stella, given the lack of surprise about her origins from Suletta’s friends. But what about the Coven? We see that by the time Ericht "dies" and she is uploaded to the Aerial, Suletta was already born. Were they made before or after Suletta. Before implies they were clones that tragically could not survive and Elnora desperately uploaded them to the Lfrith to save them, unable to bear more loss. Afterwards implies that they were necessary for control of the Gundbits. Where they more repli-children uploaded, or did Ericht simply copy her data into clones to handle the bits more easily? There are so many questions about what Elnora did to make the coven.

Notrette

The woman of mystery. We never even see her face. Depending on who you ask, the mystery is a good thing and any more information would ruin it. We know she's from Earth, that she wanted to apply the evolutionary mechanics of plants to humans, and that Quiet Zero was the key to her plans. And that, for whatever reason, she left a backdoor into it for her daughter based on the genetic code of her tomatoes. Why did she marry Delling? What was her original goal with Quiet Zero and what did she intend with it? How exactly did she die? Did she have a love affair with Prospera that saw her help Elnora create a clone of her daughter?

The Future of Gundams

Perhaps the ultimate sequel hook: we do not know what the future holds for Gundams after Quiet Zero. The Ur is presumably still around, and even if it remains a forbidden technology, we've seen that there are those willing to sacrifice lives to use that power. On the other hand, is the original goal of GUND-Arm Inc. a possibly? Can GUND Format equipped Mobile Suits be operated safely and for the good of humanity, instead of as a tool for war?

Asticassia

With help from Guel, Elan and Secelia, Asticassia survives 3 years later. But what is it's purpose? Is it still a training ground for the spacian elite to train the next generation of oppressors, or has it found new life as a technical school that takes in students from anywhere, without prejudice.

The Three Kids

In the epilogue, we see Suletta playing with three children in the wheat field. Are these children that Suletta & Miorine adopted? Or simply some local kids who Suletta likes to play with? Due to the fact that they seemingly disappear for the rest of the scene, I'm inclined to believe the latter.

[14dyh]

Re-Animator | H.Z.

Pairing: Hange Zoë x female reader Summary: Y/N fell in love with a mad scientist who aims to reanimate the dead and repurpose their bodies. Word count: 2.1k Content warning: Potentially insane behavior. A/N: Still not over Re-Animator and Hange obviously so I tried writing this in a slightly Lovecraftian style

Of Hange Zoë, who was my lover and whose unsurpassed curiosity brought our lives together in both fascination and ruin. Their recent disappearance brought about the case of sinister crimes laced with the name of Siroma University Medical School. Accusations were made, some proven under dormant pieces of evidence that only stirred at Hange's sudden disappearance. Their crimes spoke of the hideous possibilities when man is given the power of a god and as their closest companion, I became the sole testimony to the reality of the power they came to be obsessed with.

My father who owned the university hid traces of crimes to maintain the reputation of his beloved school, unknowingly covering up the involvement of his only daughter in the crimes of Hange Zoë.

It was nine years ago when I visited the university and crossed paths with Hange whose eccentricity piqued the interest of many. They were a charmer, one whose idealisms defy the traditional idea about the mechanism of life and its natural processes. One would either hold them in high regard for such unique ideas or consider their pursuits as lunacy procured by unfounded or misinterpreted data from groundless experiments. Some ridiculed Hange's views behind their back, even the professors whose underachievement despite years of research translates to petty hatred.

In Hange's experiments, they spoke of the reagent they created that would enable human flesh to extend its useful existence even after death in exchange for the creature's instinct or will. Countless animals were used for their experiments and found that after their treatment, the animals indeed regained a sign of life but no visible instinct they used to have in their earlier life. Hange aims to restore the corporeal body to its full potential without relying on instincts that it used to own. To conquer death and let the living be in full control of the deceased was Hange's idea of a world fully utilized to its capability.

Several times we talked this over as my visitations became frequent because of a family friend I visited out of obligation. Sharing the same fascination with such an extreme idea that defied natural law, I was captivated by Hange's ideals and eventually became a close companion who helped them to continue their research despite the questionable ethical practices the experiments had to go through. Eventually, Hange needed fresh deceased specimens to test the reagent in humans. It started with a few body parts gaining a sign of life within a minute or two. Hange's frustration from the frequent failed attempts was never shown, the strength of their ambition and insanity was far greater than their fear to see their work fail as a reasonable possibility. In the time we spent in such a curious nature, we eventually became lovers behind my father's back, knowing that he would disagree with Hange's unethical experimentations and my own desire to see such a fascinating thing come true.

There was a time when the reagent failed to work entirely. I could see that the desperateness to perfect the solution was affecting my lover in such ways that it became very difficult for them to hide their desire to obtain body parts from the morgue. Occasionally, a bloodstain would be on their collar or the hem of their sleeves, one time I wiped drying blood off their cheek. My disapproving remarks of their cursory behavior will only be met by a chuckle, and Hange attributing my observations to the keenness of my eye. Seeing their desperation to quickly resolve their shortcomings, I frequented the hospital and used both my privilege and sly tactics to help Hange sneak bodies from the morgue. No one doubted my intentions since I have built a respectable reputation over time. Hange came to know my efforts and promised to yield better results.

In late midnights, I often visited the underground makeshift lab Hange and I shared. A curious incident began to happen with the specimens injected with the reagent Hange altered to fit the specimen at hand. Humans and animals have varying chemical processes within their bodies as Hange explained. One night at the lab, we began to prepare a specimen we obtained with utmost freshness, a severed hand from a machinery accident. The thing regained signs of life; it began with a minor twitch and began to convulse. Hange and I observed the specimen within several intervals of time and noted the changes or movements it executed. However, the thing began to steam off and enlarge several minutes later so we had to move it to a bigger metal slab. The thing shuddered violently before erupting as a huge cloud of hot steam, leaving traces of several fractured bones. Hange did not know what to make of the behavior the specimen showed. They theorized it to be the tissues' initial reaction to the new reagent.

This cycle of reanimation and obtaining organic specimens went undiscovered. I was enthusiastic to be Hange's partner in this work that might have been considered loathsome. They entrusted me with managing operations and trusted my medical knowledge when forming decisions.

A ghastly opportunity presented itself to Hange when one night, Hange came carrying the deceased body of a man. Hange hauled the thing inside the lab, I could tell that the man had not been dead for more than half an hour as the early attributes of death had not set in.

I questioned where they obtained such a specimen but Hange only shrugged it off as an unimportant matter and diverted the conversation by asking me for help to quickly strap the thing on the metal slab. That night, despite the dark dingy nature of our makeshift laboratory, I could see the fiery intent of Hange's eyes, with the desperateness and passion of a madman or a lover. We took precautions in injecting the reagent, not risking premature animation in such a perfect specimen. The thing spasmed and struggled against its straps. The creature became so violent that it managed to break through, thrashing and writhing in misery. When the thing managed to free its hand, it began to claw on its eyes and throat. Amidst my panic and fear of what the creature was capable of, Hange only stared in profound fascination. Among the broken flasks, upturned furniture, and scattered papers, Hange stared at their prized creation with the same intensity as Pygmalion's first glimpse at Galatea. I was tempted to be caught in the same trance out of fascination but I knew Hange would ignore the danger the situation poses, too absorbed by their malevolent interest.

The thing burst out of the door, making poor use of its limbs to escape. I quickly followed it and brought out my revolver to finish off the second life it was given. The night seemed very silent after the gunshot was fired.

Hange helped me to bury the body in the secluded, shabby forest not far from the lab. That night, despite the traces of evidence left in our bodies, Hange came to hug me and told me that our cause was near to its potentiality all for the world to see.

Their voice was laced with manic intent, and their reaction that night only suggested that their unbridled desire would begin to get worse.

Hange became quite distant for a while. There are weeks when we only see each other in the university and talk very little about reanimation. Hange reasoned that they wanted their next experiment to be a surprise to me. A gift of some sort for being my partner in crime. I doubted their intentions behind this, I sensed that they were delving into more dangerous experiments and refused to involve me. Whenever I try to insist on helping them out in the lab, they only smile at me and insist that they want to show me a good result and not a faulty experiment. Thinking back on what we shared, I regretted not insisting harder, and became more difficult.

It was the first day of spring when Hange did not appear in the university. I could not hold back my worry and went immediately to the boarding house where Hange lives. They held back at first, refusing to let me in but was eventually persuaded to do so. They opened the door slightly, and showed their face to me, revealing several bandaged wounds and a bandaged left eye still seeping with blood. I tended to them as much as I could but Hange refused to speak the entire time. Their place was more of a mess than usual, with papers scattered everywhere and discarded laundry. It pains me to see as though they never took care of themself since the incident. I insisted for them to tell me the truth but it ended up with Hange being more persistent for me to stay out of the recent reanimation experiments.

All I had dreaded became reality as news about a mysterious creature who slaughtered seven people in cold blood spread upon the university. I heard among quiet conversations about the statement of the witness: the creature that attacked a quiet neighborhood was a large human-like creature that screeched and howled miserably before disappearing in a cloud of steam, leaving few fragments of bones behind.

Seeing Hange's troubled state earlier before knowing about the incident only strengthened my suspicion that they are involved with something more sinister.

Hange never attended the university again and was not found even by their friends or acquaintances. It was rumored that they moved to a different town after being seen several times outside the town.

A mysterious letter later appeared in my mail but I could not mistake Hange's messy penmanship. The letter was rather hopeful as they promised to return once our dream of defying death was brought to perfection. My devastation after they left showed in my poor health and restless behavior.

My lover has brought a monster into this world and ultimately destroyed themself to reach their true potential of having the power of a god.

I loved Hange the way a faithful follower remained devoted to their fallen god. I watched Hange's passionate, loving eyes full of curiosity and wonder shatter under the weight of the power they wielded for themself. A fallen god who went too close to the sun, one whose burning desire cannot be satiated with simple earthly pleasures.

In the several months when they seemed to have disappeared, I never failed to notice a constant presence from afar or outside my window as though in partial visits. I could never mistake Hange's presence, a watchful gaze that seemed to bore through my core every night as though patiently watching a creature in silence so it would not stir. For months, our relationship went on in this strange way. No matter how much I showed my loneliness with their choice to remain distant, I knew that Hange was resolute about their mission. I waited patiently, leaving my heart bare to no one else but my beloved.

Their sudden disappearance was reported after another curious incident in the new place they moved in. Hange's room was reported to be in shambles, their belongings ruined as though a huge creature clawed and thrashed around the room. Their laboratory swarmed with human body parts was discovered in the basement but no traces of the reagent or their research were left. My sorrow and desperation overpowered my fear and I went to the abandoned apartment late that night. I knew Hange better than the police who tried to rationalize the scene and only managed to come up with superficial theories despite Hange's records of suspicious activities years ago. I rummaged through the things Hange and I once shared in the laboratory we had together, finding the documents they must have hidden. That much was a success when I found a secret compartment Hange carefully crafted under the floorboards. It contained all their findings, the solution--all the information Hange entrusted to me. However, a notebook was left along with their things, a journal containing all that happened since the day they left. The edge of each paper was marked with a cryptic symbol only Hange and I knew. I know as much that the journal was dedicated to me.

I went home carrying all their things, scrutinizing each page with the hope that it would tell me their current whereabouts. Wherever Hange is, I know that immense danger was upon them, maybe not from the authorities but from the creatures they reanimated.

I spent the rest of my waking days in search of my beloved. It crossed my mind at the dead hours of the night that Hange may have died the night of their disappearance. However, my intuition further tells me that Hange was somewhere waiting for us to be reunited, to lead an insane life only them and I could live.

[cdr2002]

So I thought it would be fun to share some character write ups to give myself a mental idea of backstory and personality outlines going into my Trek fanfic project, the Mirror Revolution Saga, which includes my currently published and starting out fic, Star Trek Fixing the Mirror.

Obviously this project requires creating completely original mirror personas for a variety of characters never seen or very minimally characterized on screen, and I’ve quite enjoyed the challenge.

To start out, here’s one:

Nyota Uhura

ISS Enterprise communications officer turned revolutionary. Formerly believing herself to be nearly powerless within the structure of the Empire, she is inspired by Spock’s vision of a world of compassion and the fortitude of her prime universe counterpart (observed via security footage) to fight for a better future.

In her position, she has been privy to many grisly details of the operations of the ISS Enterprise: casualty reports, horrifying orders from Imperial Command, including the extermination of entire worlds. Though she has done her duty, else face death herself, Uhura despises all of the bloodshed and wishes to bring about a society where people care more than they kill. In addition, her studies of xenolinguistics have afforded her a unique outlook on alien life: seeing them as new cultures to experience and interact with, rather than to be conquered.

Later finding out that the shuttle accident which killed her parents was orchestrated by Imperial agents to silence their pro-intellectual anti-xenophobia views has only strengthened her resolve to see the entire system come down, even if it means disappointing her grandmother, a veteran of the Imperial Starfleet. A small price to pay for the liberation of billions.

[lurkingshan]

Step by Step Episode 11 (OF DOOM)

Warning: I really, really did not like this episode. If you’re trying to keep positive vibes you should scroll on by, friends! 

Welp. I told a few friends last week that my biggest disappointment would be if, after missing the mark on the emotional payoff of the slow burn and speed running the relationship, the show chose to break them up and do a time jump rather than staying with them in the present time and working through the conflicts they set up. And here we are! I wish I’d been wrong about where this was heading. Shouts to @waitmyturtles and @neuroticbookworm for holding me down while this show fell apart on me, I’ve been all in a tizzy about it, because I really loved it for awhile there.

This episode, yet again, felt like a disjointed mess. After last week’s cliffhanger, the idea of Pat resigning to get away from the predatory office gossip fell away within a few quick scenes. Instead the tension disappeared as the plot brought them into a bubble with only their most supportive colleagues and we swerved into a retread of the Put nonsense and a new plot about Jeng and Pat fighting to save the digital marketing team via the power of Put’s quasi-celebrity and Instagram likes. Or something. I honestly couldn’t tell you the details of what they were trying to accomplish, I was too distracted by my incredulity to pay close attention to this very sudden fake problem that they were obviously going to conquer (that, my friends, is what we call conflict with no stakes). Meanwhile, the show suddenly wants me to care about Jaab and Jen again - enough to devote a big portion of the penultimate episode’s runtime to them, what a choice - after doing fuck all with that plot for six weeks. It’s a no from me. 

It doesn’t matter anyway, because soon enough we’re time skipping again! After resolving the work challenge subplot we speed past another three months of Pat and Jeng’s relationship without addressing any of their issues, and I guess I’m supposed to be at peace with being a full nine months into their relationship with no onscreen emotional advancement? But I gotta be honest, y’all. I am not. You just don’t do this with a slow burn romance narrative. You can’t spend 80% of your runtime building to something that you have no intention of paying off, and no amount of thinking about what else this show is trying to say is going to convince me they did proper justice to the relationship. I already broke down why I didn’t think the episode 10 culmination got us there, and nothing that happened in this episode changed my opinion.

And all of this is leading to yet another time jump - two entire years this time - after the big reveal that Jeng doesn’t believe in Pat at all and literally bought his success, Evil Daddy knew it all along and waited for a choice moment to deploy the info for maximum damage while twirling his villain mustache, and Pat is finally quitting for real and dumping Jeng for good measure.

And ya know what? GOOD FOR PAT. I was completely on his side in this decision. If there’s one bright spot in this episode (other than Chot, always Chot) it’s Pat getting himself together enough to realize he deserves better than the bullshit he’s been getting from Put and Jeng and walking on out. So Jeng and Pat are now broken up, but I never got invested in their relationship in the first place, because we barely saw it, let alone got the chance to live in and feel it. I wasn’t even upset while watching this breakup scene - it left me emotionally indifferent. Which is maybe the worst thing I can say about a dramatic climax in a story.

I guess next week we’ll meet Jeng and Pat again two years in the future and get some kind of happy ending. I’m gonna stick around for the finale and cross my fingers that we get all the epilogue fluff we have definitely earned, but sadly, this show has lost me.

[alwaysmychoices]

Compromise in Bloom

Synopsis: Now that Charlie and Ethan are back together, Ethan must face Bloom and reach a compromise before Bloom destroys their new future.

Chapter 42 of the “with and without” series

Previous Series: “a weekend with dr. ramsey”

Pairing: Dr. Ethan Ramsey x MC (Charlotte “Charlie” Greene)

Words: 2.6k

Rating: Teen (language)

Also available on AO3 & Wattpad (link in Masterlist)

Ethan felt weightless as he floated down the Edenbrook halls. The whispered gossip and interested stares couldn’t touch him when he felt like this. The rumors of his reunion with Charlie hadn’t reached the whole staff, but soon, it would – and miraculously, not even the impending scandal bothered Ethan.

Because, really, none of it mattered.

For the first time in Ethan’s life, he saw the world with perfect clarity. The only thing he really cared about was Charlie. He’d conquered his career, made his name in academia, and succeeded at nearly everything he’d intended to do. He didn’t need to chase glory, nor did he need to sacrifice himself for his loyalty to this hospital.

Ethan had spent his entire career thinking he must be a martyr to his grand ambition. Nothing – and no one – could stand in the way of his achievement. He’d designed a life where he’d be remembered by textbooks but not by anyone who loved him.

And now he had a chance at something different. He’d felt the crushing loss of Charlie’s absence and was blessed with a second chance. He wouldn’t ruin it again.

Ethan was positively cocky as he walked through Edenbrook – even smiling at an intern who was obviously gossiping in the corner. In a few minutes, he’d be untouchable. For now, the crowd could be satisfied with the strange mystery of Dr. Ramsey’s surprise “vacation” and his unusually happy mood. They’d forget about all of it when they learned that Dr. Ramsey and Dr. Greene had professed their love in the parking lot. And Ethan would make no efforts to hide it either.

He’d promised to be obnoxious about how much he loved Charlie, and it was a promise he intended to keep – as soon as he resolved the danger lurking in the administrative wing.

This part of the hospital used to be an afterthought. It was tidy and well-maintained but never ostentatious. But of course, Bloom’s ego touched every part of Edenbrook, especially the administrative suite. When renovations began, Ethan insisted it was a ridiculous waste of resources that should have been extended to patient care instead. This was only the first of many disagreements.

Ethan wasn’t sure when his disagreements with Blooms had transformed into something more. They started small – fights over which cases should be assigned to the Diagnostics Team and Bloom’s level of involvement in their work. What began as a series of passive-aggressive digs escalated into a war.

Bloom drew the first blood when he leveraged Charlie’s career as blackmail on Ethan. His relationship with Charlie was the first casualty, but despite caving to Bloom’s demands, Ethan ensured it wasn’t the only blood on the field. He’d fought Bloom at every opportunity – blocking unethical treatments, refusing Bloom’s intended patients, and relegating research projects.

Ethan didn’t remember why he did it now. He wasn’t sure if it really was for the patients or if he was acting out on his anger and despair – and he hated himself for not knowing.

None of this was what Ethan wanted. They’d both gone too far.

Ethan didn’t want to fight anymore. He wanted to lay down his weapons and be with the woman he loved, which required compromising with his enemy.

Admittedly, he didn’t really want to do it. The idea of compromising on anything with Bloom made Ethan feel nauseous. There was only one reason he walked into that office – and her name was Charlie.

As soon as Ethan entered the room, Bloom’s assistant slumped into her desk. Meetings between Ethan and Bloom were increasingly frequent and famously antagonistic. Seeing Dr. Ramsey meant that her day was about to get a lot worse.

“He’s asked to not be disturbed,” the assistant glared at Ethan in silent warning. Please do not ruin my perfectly enjoyable afternoon, she quietly begged.

“He’ll want to speak with me,” Ethan insisted, smiling politely to sooth her ire. It didn’t work.

The assistant highly doubted that Mr. Bloom would actually want to speak with Dr. Ramsey, but she sensed that Dr. Ramsey wouldn’t give up without a fight. So, she lifted her phone and dialed Bloom’s direct line. Just as Ethan predicted, Bloom instructed her to invite Ethan in as soon as the assistant said Ethan’s name. Grimacing, Bloom’s assistant ushered him inside the CEO’s lavish office and firmly closed the door behind her, hoping they’d invested in sufficient soundproofing during renovations.

Leland Bloom didn’t stand to greet Ethan. Instead, he watched Ethan like a predator watched his favorite prey. Normally, this blatant intimidation tactic would have incensed Ethan, but today, he merely frowned.

Now this is intriguing, Bloom thought to himself.

Feuding with Ethan Ramsey had become a bit of a hobby for the ruthless billionaire. By now, it was more than just business. Bloom genuinely despised Dr. Ramsey, but that didn’t stop him from being perpetually curious about the medical genius. Seeing him break his normal routine was enough to enthrall Bloom.

“I thought you were supposed to be halfway across the country by now,” Bloom quipped.

Ethan hadn’t told Bloom about his plans to resign and move to San Diego, but his failure to inform Bloom hardly meant that the plan was a secret – nor would the change be unwelcome. As interesting and brilliant as Dr. Ramsey was, he’d become a roadblock, and Bloom didn’t tolerate roadblocks. Ethan would need to comply, or he would need to leave. Having Ethan resign eased the process.

“Change of plans,” Ethan’s face tightened.

“Later flight?”

“No flight.”

Bloom’s eyebrows shot to the top of his temples. Still, he tried to hide his surprise by teasing, “Staycation then.”

Ethan eyed his opponent, trying to mask his disdain. Ethan hated many things about Bloom, but perhaps most of all, he hated the games he played. Feigning ignorance was exhausting and pointless. What was the point of making a veiled threat when they both knew the truth?

They didn’t need to perform for anyone, especially each other.

“We don’t have to pretend, Leland.”

Bloom’s smile twitched at the use of his first name. He preferred more honorific titles just to remind Ethan of their power imbalance.

“Fine,” Bloom snarled, wiping a small piece of lint off his jacket, “But you should know that threatening to quit on such short notice violates your employment contract and does nothing to change my opinion of you. You won’t scare me into backing down, Dr. Ramsey. Nor will you save Dr. Greene from becoming collateral damage. Breaking up with her won’t change the fact you carried on an affair with your prize student, nor will it save her career if it all comes out.”

This got under Ethan’s skin – just as Bloom knew it would.

You had to admire a man who was so easily swayed by love. Once Bloom discovered this weakness, it was so easy to exploit. If Bloom had been a better man, he would have found a more challenging target to keep the odds fair. But no one would ever accuse Bloom of being a better man.

Rage built in Ethan’s chest, accompanied by the uncomfortable prickling of fear on his skin. Ethan promised Charlie he would stay, even though his presence could ruin her career. Making the promise didn’t soothe his terror, nor did their romantic reunion mean that Bloom would call off the attack – especially when it meant that Ethan was more eager than ever to protect Charlie.

Nothing was worth this feeling of dread – not the hospital, not the Diagnostics Team, not even Ethan’s career and reputation. Ethan would gladly give it all up for Charlie to be safe. That’s what almost drove him to California, and that’s why he was here in this office. He wasn’t out of grand gestures yet.

“Isn’t it time we called a truce?” Ethan exuded confidence as he spoke, but Bloom saw his lurking fear.

“A truce?” Bloom scoffed, “Truces are for people prepared to lose. I think you forget the stakes, Dr. Ramsey. Until the day my wife is cured, there is no loss I am willing to accept.”

“I never said you had to lose.”

Bloom wanted to lecture Ethan on the nature of their little war. This was a zero-sum game– one winner, one loser. Any result that didn’t promptly cure his wife and allow them to be reunited would be regarded as a loss. Ethan would be foolish to think anything else.

But Bloom was curious.

So, instead of informing Ethan of his unbearable naivete, Bloom motioned for Ethan to take a seat across from him. Ethan complied, doing his best to maintain his confidence and courage. Neither man was fooled by it.

“This is unsustainable, Leland,” Ethan used his first name, just to put Bloom back on edge, “I’m here to offer a compromise. You want the Diagnostics Team and my research. I want you to leave Charlotte out of this.”

Bloom stared with disinterest, “Go on.”

“I’m prepared to go on sabbatical – one year away from Edenbrook to work on my long-neglected research. I’ll leave the team to Dr. Carrick, who you know will be more amenable to your plans. There will be no scandal, no harm to the institution or yourself. I’ll return to my lab, where I’ll reinstate myself as an influential academic. I’ll publish in all the right journals and speak at all the right conferences. I’ll tell everyone that I was able to dedicate myself to academia because of your wisdom and generosity. My research will still be my own, but we both know it will benefit your wife’s case.

“You came here because of my research,” Ethan continued. For too long, Ethan had let their power dynamic remain imbalanced. It was time to correct that. “You wanted my prestige and my connections. You wanted my work. The only reason you want me gone is that I’m too difficult to manipulate. You’ll still get my research – you’ll have everything you wanted.”

“Everything?” Bloom sneered, “If you wanted to give me everything, you should have complied months ago.”

“You get this, or I leave – and you get nothing.”

The threat echoed in the room.

“What’s in it for you?”

“If I’m not working here, nothing is stopping me from being with Charlie.”

“You think a new job title will protect you from the scandal?” Bloom titled his head, offering insincere sympathy, “Ethan, you had an affair with your student for over a year. You can’t go back in time to hide that.”

“I’m not trying to hide the past. There will be no need. You’re not going to bring it up.”

“Oh, Ethan,” Bloom leaned back in his chair, genuinely amused by Ethan’s confidence. Bloom wasn’t a man of honor – what would ever stop him?

“If you make so much as a comment that harms her reputation or career, the deal is off. It took me less than a day to find another hospital begging for my expertise – I’m never out of options, Leland.”

“I could take away all of your options, Ramsey,” Bloom snarled. He was always prepared to bury Ethan if needed. He’d already tracked down a patient willing to sue and jeopardize Ethan’s medical license. Ethan wasn’t nearly as powerful as he thought.

“You could scare off every employer in the country. I wouldn’t care,” Ethan said honestly, “I’ve had a record-breaking career. I could retire tomorrow. I will retire tomorrow if need be.”

Normally, neither man would have believed this. Ethan was a slave to his career, and a life full of empty days and disgraced legacies would haunt him.

But there was something about Ethan’s voice when he said it – true sincerity. He was really willing to leave it all behind for Charlie.

That was the double-edged sword to manipulating a man so devoted.

“Leland, you told me that you were only interested in winning. Dragging my name through scandal and forfeiting my research hardly seems like a win,” Ethan challenged, “This feud isn’t healing your wife. We’re on the edge of personal and professional ruin, and the person who will suffer the most is the only person you claim to care about.”

Bloom winced. A low blow but deserved, nonetheless.

He came here for his wife. Ethan was nothing compared to that.

“Fine,” Bloom acquiesced, “I accept. You’ll be on a research sabbatical for the rest of Dr. Greene’s residency in exchange for no scandal or harm to her career. But when she finishes her residency, I’ll still expect your work. You’ll return to the team and follow my commands, or you’ll stay in your lab. I won’t accept your insolence any longer.”

Ethan’s stoic veneer cracked, and streams of relief and joy peaked through. The terms were less than ideal, and undoubtedly, Ethan would renegotiate his future after Charlotte graduated. But by then, they could both leave if they needed to, and Charlie would be able to enter the field without the mark of his scandal.

And tonight – and every night thereafter – Ethan could come home to Charlie without fear.

Despite everything, Ethan’s visible delight pleased Bloom. Perhaps compromise was better than destruction.

“You know, I always liked Charlie,” Bloom said candidly, “I never intended to harm her. She was an innocent victim in a holy war for the woman I loved.”

This excuse wasn’t enough for Ethan. It didn’t forgive months of cruelty and threats. It didn’t change the fact that Bloom’s actions had harmed multiple patients, nor did it erase the damage to Ethan’s relationship with Charlie. But despite all its deficiencies, this excuse was something Ethan could understand.

This ‘holy war’ was familiar. He’d fought a similar one months ago, when he’d sat behind glass and watched Charlie fade. He’d held her frail body and wished he could take off his protective gear and die with her, just so he’d be spared the horrible reality of life without her. He knew what it meant to watch a love fade from behind glass.

And Ethan knew that his personal victory was an affront to Bloom. Ethan cured Charlie and revived the promise of a lifetime with the woman he loved. He held her every night and indulged in the steady rate of her heartbeat.

But Ethan didn’t extend the same courtesy to Bloom. He hadn’t cured his wife. He hadn’t reunited them. Instead, he’d screamed about medical ethics while Bloom attempted to bend all the rules to save his true love.

Ethan didn’t blame Bloom for hating him. If he had been in the same position, he would have burned the city down just to have a few more minutes with Charlie.

“I always wanted a cure for your wife,” Ethan confessed, “I know what it means to be separated from the love of your life while they suffer. That’s a fate I wouldn’t wish on anyone, even you.”

The two men stared at each other for a moment – realizing the unique connection they’d often tried to forget. They were looking at the only other man who had experienced this kind of loss, and even if that was the ultimate cause of their animosity, it inspired a sense of kinship. Bloom would abide by the deal – if not out of honor but out of respect for a pair of lovers who had escaped his cruel fate.

Bloom stood, offering his hand to seal the deal. Ethan accepted.

“Dr. Ramsey, congratulations. You are officially on sabbatical.”

“Thank you, Mr. Bloom.”

As of this moment, Ethan Ramsey no longer worked at Edenbrook – which meant he never had to hide Charlie again.

[paragonrobits]

"why is Star Wars so unfair to the Dark Side and the Sith, why can't there be more than two at a time" well you see canonically the Sith are so unbelievably backstabbing, treacherous and violently prone to the same kind of turbo evil that makes the Galactic Empire (which is probably the iconic example of being obviously evil and cruel for no reason) is functionally an incarnation of the Sith Empire, that they wouldn't stop killing each other in the middle of heated wars with the Republic and Jedi that Darth Bane's brilliant idea to resolve this was to having there only be two Sith at a time since they would inevitably wind up killing each other but this way the concept of the Sith would survive

so let me emphasize that for a minute

this is a faction so inherently obsessed with temporal power that they backstab each other and beat their actual enemies to the punch that they literally cannot stop killing each other WHILE IN THE MIDDLE OF A LITERAL WAR. The Sith's baseline state is 'constant civil war over who gets to be Biggest Tyrant'

with that in mind, wanting the Sith to be shown in a more positive light is honestly missing the point. Yes, they're about passion, but one, its probably passion in the archaic sense of 'suffering and mental agony', and two, every single canon Sith and Dark Side users in general are cackling power-mad conquerers and sadists who regard any kind of self control as a weakness, so its really inevitable they wind up violently attacking and killing everyone around them the second they feel mildly annoyed

you don't want dark side users shown in a better light, because that would mean they're light side users, that's how it goes. You want a dark side user who cares about people and wants to help others? That's a light side user.

[tempfolder]

Revisiting “Dune”

Following the release of “Dune 2” in theaters, and the echoes of the surrounding discourse, I started to wonder whether I missed something in my original readings of the Dune novel. The messianic aspects of the novel’s ending were described differently from what I remembered. I decided it’s time for a re-read with a focus on that theme. I came away with a better understanding of the novel, but a diminished view on the story of Dune.

A Questionable Ending

My previous understanding was that Paul managed through his use of prescience to avoid the galactic jihad in his name that he was so worried about throughout the book. The whole point of marrying the daughter of the Emperor was to allow transition of power without a full blown war. That was the elegant gambit, the narrow path he managed to take through the future possibilities of his visions. I was surprised when at the very end of the film, Paul, disappointed with the response of the Great Houses to his ascendancy, sends out his troops to conquer space, initiating the holy war.

I thought that mostly this was “Dune Messiah” leaking into the main story. To be clear, I don’t care for any of the Dune sequels. I never read them, nor do I intend to - the original novel was obviously written to be a complete work. I treat the extrapolations added to the Dune universe in the sequels as only marginally relevant to the reading of the original text. But was this plot point present in the “Dune” novel itself?

On re-reading, the book seems to match the interpretation of the film. This thread is central to the narrative yet it is resolved somewhat ambiguously, so I’m not surprised I missed it earlier. Before the climactic battle with Feyd Rautha, Paul muses:

And Paul saw how futile were any efforts of his to change any smallest bit of this. He had thought to oppose the jihad within himself, but the jihad would be. His legions would rage out from Arrakis even without him. They needed only the legend he already had become. He had shown them the way, given them mastery even over the Guild which must have the spice to exist. A sense of failure pervaded him [...] This is the climax, Paul thought. From here, the future will open, the clouds part onto a kind of glory. And if I die here, they’ll say I sacrificed myself that my spirit might lead them. And if I live, they’ll say nothing can oppose Muad’Dib.

Yet just after the battle, he says to Chani:

That woman over there will be my wife and you but a concubine because this is a political thing and we must weld peace out of this moment, enlist the Great Houses of the Landsraad.

I guess that last excerpt was a hope and the first was a prophecy.

However, this seems to leave us with a lesser book, a weaker story. What was the point if all the efforts were indeed futile? What do we learn if all the powers of Muad’dib don’t help him resolve his dilemma? 

A True Messiah

Dune has Paul coded throughout as more than just a Hero. All the narrative hallmarks are there. Paul is a young prince of an ethically noble family avenging his father through the use of his unique genetics. He is physically and mentally top-of-the-line. He has Special Powers: The Voice, Mentat capabilities, Prescience. He intuitively wears his stillsuit perfectly; he calls up the biggest maker with his thumper; he can process the poison of the Water of Life; et cetera, et cetera. The novel goes out of its way to mark Paul as truly special. He is not an impostor who survives by tricking the local superstitious populace into crowning him - he is an honest-to-god miracle prophet. If Arrakis had water, the novel would find a way for Paul to walk on it. Lisan al-Gaib!

Why have him aware, almost from the get-go, of his “terrible purpose” and still have him eventually fail? Why set up a Messiah but end up with failure?

Perhaps the intent was to contrast the Hero-led Fremen with the eco-aware Fremen? Their long-term terraforming project abandoned in favor of universal conquest? Liet’s father explicitly mentions this (“No more terrible disaster could befall your people than for them to fall into the hands of a Hero”). If that was the point, why have Paul promise to have flowing water on Arrakis with his ascendancy? That would mean the Fremen rightly chose the faster path to achieve the same terraforming result.

Perhaps the intent was to show the damage that can be done by messianic figures? Yet Paul is not a messianic figure, he is an actual messiah. There is rich critique to be made of the madness of the crowds in the face of a false prophet; much less so in the face of a true one.

Perhaps the idea was to show that even the most justified revenge path leads even the most noble to universal murder? Yet Paul is not Hamlet, he is not mad with revenge, nor does it cause him to make tragic mistakes. Revenge is just one of several motivators. Paul seems more aligned with Fremen liberation and the prevention of the jihad than with kanly (with Gurney serving as contrast in that aspect).

Had the ending suggested that the jihad was averted, with Paul successfully threading the political and military needle to ascend to the throne, it would have made a simpler, but better novel. Its payoff would have matched its set-up. It would have made Paul’s powers meaningful and his sacrifices worth it - his dead firstborn, his brush with death in the Water of Life, his Chani who remains forever a concubine. After all, if War isn’t averted, why bother with the political marriage? 

The Appeal

I want to make a digression and ask: why do we like Dune? 

After all, most of the characters aren’t particularly likable (*cough* Paul *cough*). The high-level arc isn’t particularly exciting, both in the optimistic reading (white savior leads oriental warriors to avenge father) and in the pessimistic one (white savior leads oriental warriors to break colonial yoke and unleash jihad). And there’s all that awful poetry.

So why so loved? I think, in large part, due to the apparent complexity of “Dune” (the novel). The complexity is there to provide the reader with a satisfying feeling of touching a rich world. It is a hill to climb, a challenge to overcome, gradually figuring out what’s going on, rewarded with understanding through effort.

The apparent complexity is present on multiple levels, beginning with the very liberal seasoning of the text with neologisms, with words and terms on loan from other languages. It’s there in the heavy dosage of intrigue, of feints within feints within feints. It’s there in the annotated dialogues where every half said or unsaid word conveys deep meaning to all-insightful participants. It’s in the half-familiar half-alien symbolism and mysticism of the Bene Gesserit and the Fremen.

Just as the text itself is intentionally complex, the world it describes is intentionally simplified. The universe of Dune is rich but small. Yes, it spans tens of thousands of years and thousands of planets, but it feels like the Holy Roman Empire. The mere suggestion that desert people can become conquerors of the galaxy just because they’re used to fighting for moisture is an indicator of how simple this universe is. Of course the Empire is feudal and archaic. Of course the skies of Arrakis are empty. Of course the shields force them to use knives. Of course there are no computers. The in-universe reasons aren’t important; there would simply be no novel otherwise. It also looks much cooler this way.

Which is also my larger point: a lot of Dune’s complexity is only apparent. It’s complexity for spectacle’s sake much more than it is necessary. Using the Hebrew “Kwisatz Haderach” is a lot cooler for the English reader than the literal “shortening of the way” that it stands for. A complex intrigue where you give Leto Arrakis just to betray him and give it back to the Harkonnens sounds cool, but always puzzles when you think about it too much. The best example of something that is visually striking but doesn’t weigh much upon scrutiny is the Gom Jabbar test.

A Bigger Gom Jabbar

Really, impressive scene. The box, the needle, the pain, the Voice. Iconic. Is it a profound test though? Big dilemma you gave Paul here, Reverend Mother, either suffer pain or die. Is this insightful? It wasn’t even a “hidden” test where the subject was supposed to reject the false binary option given to him by the Reverend Mother. No. Pain or Die. You decided not to die? Human after all!

If you squint a little, you can see a similarity between the showy complexity of the essentially hollow Gom Jabbar, and Paul’s meandering resistance against the tide of the jihad. Something that is superficially both complex and cool, but on deeper inspection doesn’t bear much weight as a story. If Paul’s dilemma was to either perish in the desert or to manifest as the messiah and suffer the moral pain of a billion deaths in the universal jihad – well, not a big dilemma is it? On closer reading of the novel it turns out there wasn’t even a “hidden” option that rejects this false binary.

Was there? The open question I ask myself is - was there something that Paul could have done to avoid the jihad? Was there a choice? Some pivotal point where it’s clear that Paul made a mistake? If there was, it sure is hidden well. If there wasn't, then Dune is a lesser story. It’s a lot of cool prose, but it’s a lesser story than I thought.

[hypergamiss]

Hi there! I've been going through some difficulties repeatedly in my academics and life in general that i want to resolve once and for all and make sure it's in the past. I've been having issues during my viva and a massive inferiority complex over others having more practical experience than me in my field and not being good enough. I thought the baggage of my teens and my self concept back then had gotten better but these patterns keep making an appearance and reminding me how much time I've lost over these issues. I've come to the conclusion over the years that i have a habit of putting myself down and the negative self talk is reducing my chances of getting better at anything. I'm so frustrated that I'm this way because I repeatedly get told that I'm an excellent student and I have a bright future ahead but my own perception of myself is so distorted that it's coming in the way of achieving things. What's more is that people can see this inferiority much more than before. Obviously it's hard to miss due to my behaviour and that makes me an easy target too. Ik i should try to find the solution myself but i really need another person's POV and opinion on where I could start. I've decided this year is going to mark the end of my negative self concept! I'd be very grateful for your advice. Thank you ❤

It sounds like you're taking a fantastic first step towards conquering that negativity! Recognizing these patterns and actively seeking ways to break free is a powerful move. Here are some ideas to get you started on your journey towards a more positive self-image:

Challenge the Voice in Your Head:

Fact-check your thoughts: When that inner critic starts whispering, stop and question its validity. Are those thoughts based on facts or just negative self-talk?

Reframe the narrative: Instead of "I'm not good enough," try "This is a challenge, and I'm going to learn from it."

Focus on Growth:

Celebrate small wins: Every step forward counts! Did you ace a quiz? Did you present your ideas more confidently during class discussions? Acknowledge these achievements, no matter how small.

Embrace "yet": When comparing yourself to others, remember they too started somewhere. Instead of "They're so much better," try "They're experienced, and I can get there yet."

Self-Compassion is Key:

Forgive past mistakes: We all make them. Learn from them and let go of the guilt or shame.

Practice self-care: Prioritize activities that make you feel good – exercise, hobbies, spending time with loved ones. A healthy you is a more confident you.

Seek Support:

Talk to a trusted friend, family member, or therapist: Sharing your struggles can be incredibly helpful. A professional can provide guidance and tools to manage negativity.

Additional Resources:

Explore online resources like cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) techniques for managing negative thoughts.

Consider self-help books on building self-esteem and overcoming imposter syndrome.

Remember: Change takes time and effort. Don't get discouraged if you have setbacks. Celebrate your progress, and keep reminding yourself of how far you've come. You've got this!

Here's a bonus tip:

Write down your positive qualities and goals. Reviewing them regularly can be a powerful way to combat negativity.

You've already made a great decision to take control of your self-image. This year can absolutely be the year you leave your negative self-concept in the past! Keep going, you've got a bright future ahead. 🤍

[jumpscaregoose]

what makes the call of the night manga so good to me is that it's not really a romance manga in the typical sense but actually a manga about romance. like it does have a romantic subplot and it does end with that subplot being resolved (ish) but the main theme it interacts with is the nature of romantic attraction in different relationships.

and the way it does this is fascinating to me. the way call of the night analyzes and discusses romance isn't wishy washy true love conquers all like you might expect. it's nuanced. it's almost clinical.

the most memorable scene to me is this one where a character pulls out an honest to god CHART of human emotions to explain how another character briefly experienced something that was almost, but not exactly, romantic love

this scene has stuck with me ever since I first read it

I've talked before about how this manga was what pushed me into realizing I was arospec, and this is why. call of the night talks about romance the exact way my arospec brain does.

since realizing I was arospec, I've come to relate to kou more and more. this scene, from early in the manga, was when a lot of it started to click

I'd known about aromanticism before starting call of the night, so obviously when this scene appeared I was like aromantic mention! nice!

and then the manga keeps going.

I'm still not exactly sure where I fall on the aromantic spectrum, because that's hard as fuck to figure out when all you have is your own experience. I could be full aro, I could be demi, I don't even know anymore, fuck it we ball.

I think about kou and nazuna's relationship a lot.

they're friends. best friends. for most of the manga, even though kou's goal is to fall in love with nazuna, their relationship is entirely platonic. they kiss a few times, there's blood drinking, it's not the typical amatonormative definition of platonic. but it is platonic. even when they develop romantic feelings for each other, their dynamic doesn't suddenly change (it does a bit, because of plot angst, but if you read it you'll get what I mean)

it almost creeps me out how much this reminds me of myself, and all the times I might have experienced romantic attraction but literally can't tell

call of the night is honestly just so good. if you're aro (especially alloaro. this is the most alloaro thing I've ever read) I totally think you should give it a read

I NEED to do a full readthrough again and pick out all the little "vampirism as romance" details... I was going to complain about not having time but my finals are almost over so... I do...

[milkstoner]

okay i got crazier while in the shower so another fascinating and frankly vile aspect of mallesil’s dynamic is that silver was made for malleus, but malleus was not made for him.

1. his magic was crafted in natural reaction to malleus’ (& in extensis the draconias’) antics.

2. lilia’s grooming (so what is mental, his resolve, his duty) prepared him to serve malleus.

what im getting at is malleus is great, old, and fey, his status may restrict him, but his power knows no bounds, and his magic wasn’t crafted in anticipation for a battle with silver… and, well, silver cant say the same. malleus was raised to lead a nation and perhaps conquer some more, effectively objectifying those beneath him, and replacing silver once he passes—silver, who lives for malleus… while malleus lives for something else.

it makes a potential romantic dynamic so heartbreakingly tragic. the devastation of loss aside, malleus will have to move on. he’ll marry, pass his crown on…

(obviously im delusional so in my hopeless romantic mind, malleus was, too, made for silver, but only because he loves him purely and innocently)