#(the occasional word-vomit-monologue is fine but this was like. all the time)
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aroaessidhe · 2 years ago
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2023 reads // twitter thread  
Tears in the Water
NA contemporary slice of life romance about a competitive swimmer with anxiety at a sports university
they start seriously questioning their gender when they make some new friends and start dating a trans volleyball player
queer friend groups, aspec characters
#Tears in the Water#aroaessidhe 2023 reads#trans books#nonbinary books#asexual books#i enjoyed this overall!#a good slice of life with lots of gender feelings#a few nitpicks:#there were a lot of like….jumping STRAIGHT into 3 paragraph dialogue about feelings about gender or sexuality or anxiety with no breaks#which like isn’t inherently bad I just think there could have been more of a lead up/build a lot of the times to make it feel more like a na#natural conversation#(the occasional word-vomit-monologue is fine but this was like. all the time)#re: the aroace side character; he’s ace and questioning if he’s aro and we mostly see that through the lens of negativity;#or he’s talking about his feelings as if it’s a negative thing to the MC and the MC is like telling him he’s probably aro and it’s valid#I guess there is an important space for aros who don’t want to be aro coming to terms with it (and he is happier about it by the end!)#i just don’t relate lmao i’ve never wanted to be allo. lmao.#i think something felt just slightly off about how it was written and discussed? maybe more the fact that it was through the MCs eyes more t#than anything#and also shoved into one chapter rather than. spaced out a bit idk#(also I don’t understand knowing you’re ace but not really knowing anything about being aro? but i guess that is also probably something#people experience irl)#(anyway; not a ‘this is bad representation’ criticism just a ‘could have been slightly better’ one)
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curly-bangtan · 5 years ago
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Heatwave Drabble #4: like a best friend
[Heatwave // Godless // Heatwave Drabbles] <- have to read first
Pairing: Taehyung x reader
Summary: You and Taehyung run into his infamous cheating ex, only for him to introduce you as his current girlfriend. As you play along with his narrative, you can’t help but feel insecure and jealous.
Genre: drabble, very fluffy, angst, f2l, bit of fake dating
Warnings: typical emotional constipation from these two, jealous!oc, heartbreakingly boyfriend!taehyung, indirect confession that they’re both unaware of lol
Word count: 5.8k
A/N: Oh look, more jealousy? Are we even surprised at this point?? Requested by my little muffin @taexxxiiaa. Sorry to all the Heatwave fans for this constant torture of unresolved feelings. 
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Taehyung has a habit of stuffing his face with too much food and consequently eating in pout. As he is doing right now. You watch him merrily wolf down another soy sauce-dipped slice of raw salmon and stack the miniature plate with the rest of his conquests. It’s his sixth plate.
When he’d first shown you the email he received for ‘all you can eat' sushi, your response was a firm “No.” You’re not even a fan of seafood in general, let alone raw fish. But Taehyung was persistent, insisting on what a bargain it is and how it’s sushi season right now. Sushi season, what bullshit. Another “No.” Yet when Taehyung has his eyes set on something, especially when it comes to food, there’s little that can stop him. He knows how to use his assets - batting is lashes, huffing like a baby, nuzzling into your neck - until you finally let out a defeated sigh.
So here you are, plotting how best to sneak in some wasabi into his food. This wimp has a full on breakdown at the slightest taste of spice, you can just envision his face when the wasabi burns up his nostrils and through to his ears.
That will teach him not to drag you out to sushi again.
“Why aren’t you eating your udon?” Taehyung’s eyes are wide and innocent, unsuspecting of your mischievou scheme. “Too hot?”
“Yeah, don’t want to burn my tongue.” You stir your steaming noodles, smiling to yourself.
The two of you had managed to secure a four-person booth due to his non-stop nagging to come early to avoid the queue. The restaurant is now bustling with customers and stressed waiters, the smell of Japanese food infused in the warm air. You’re both sat on one couch, while sat across you is another couple who are just finishing with their lunch. This arrangement is due to the busy demand of the restaurant, squeezing in however many impatient hungry people as they can. Though you didn’t have a problem with sharing a booth with strangers at first, Taehyung’s ravenous gorging of sushi after sushi has made you particularly self conscious.
As soon as the couple leave after paying their bill, you turn to hiss at Taehyung. “Why are you eating like that?”
“Like what?” His words are barely audible with his mouth full. “Are you gonna eat your udon or not? I can help you out if you can’t finish the whole thing.”
Ah, there it is, his infamous line - I can help you out if you can’t finish the whole thing.
Honestly, his appetite is abominable.
“Order your own udon!” You begin eating your noodles to prove that you are hungry, and you will finish the whole thing.
Taehyung tucks his hair behind his ear (you’ve recently noticed that his ears are abnormally big, which you guess explains the massive dick). Just a few days ago, you had managed to convince him to get a perm. The main selling point was: ‘all the bitches will go crazy for it, trust me’. Bitches being you.  And indeed, all the bitches are crazy for it. In the timespan at which you’ve been in this restaurant alone, you’ve caught almost every single girl checking him out, eyes flickering too often towards your booth for it to be coincidental.
When their eyes fell onto you, you would smile at them politely, yet to your surprise, they’d wear a sour expression and ignore your courtesy. You soon realised that they think you’re Taehyung’s girlfriend. Girlfriend! The thought had made you shudder and scoot further away from him.
“Nah, I need to save room for the sushi, baby.” He pats his stomach that remains annoyingly flat despite his feasting. “I need to pee, I’ll be right back. Can you order some more California Rolls and the Dragon Roll please? Oh, actually, and one more Soft Shell Crab Roll and a Tempura Shrimp as well please?”
You glare hard at his back as he scuttles out the booth and hurries to the toilet. Stupid dork. It’s only noon and he has already eaten a whole day’s worth of food. He’s going to end up vomiting his guts out if he keeps at this rate.
Still, you wave the waiter over and place his order for him. The waiter’s kind of cute, he’s got that soft wholesome look, the kind of boy you bring home to your parents. You wonder why he’s avoiding your eye and not slipping you his number. You hope it’s not because he thinks you’re with Taehyung.
A new pair of customers are being ushered to your booth across from you to replace the departed couple; it’s two pleasant looking girls this time, chatting away in blithe. This time, they reciprocate your smile with nods of their own.
Taehyung returns from the bathroom shortly, yet as he approaches your booth, he halts in his step so abruptly that you spin to face him.
“Ryujin?” The shock in his voice is unmistakable. His eyes are locked on one of the girls that’s just arrived opposite you. Static.
“Taehyung?” She gasps, returning the same surprise, pupils widening.
Ryujin? Taehyung’s never mentioned a Ryujin to you before? Who is she?
Taehyung’s face is stoic, completely stripped of its normal cheeriness. Lips pressed in a thin line, jaw screwed firmly shut. Shit… You turn to assess the girl, digging through your memory for a Ryujin, yet failing. Who the hell is she to have Taehyung react in such a way? If she were just a friend, he’d be rushing over to greet her. If she were someone he slept with, he’d subtly acknowledge her but make no big deal out of it.
Instead, he’s clenching his fists, feet planted an arm’s length away from your table.
You clear your throat, snapping him out of his trance. “You know each other?”
Finally, he glances over at you for the first time in what feels like ages. And right away, you see the disorientation in his eyes. Taehyung slowly makes his way back into the booth, sliding in beside you until your legs touch.
“Yeah, she’s my ex girlfriend.”
Oh.
Oh.
That cheating bitch.
If it weren’t for the firm hand placed quickly on your thigh as if he’d known you’d react in such manner, you would have leapt up and started screaming at her. The anger is rushing to your head all at once. You’re struggling not to chuck the stack of plates at her face.
So this is the girl who had broken Taehyung’s heart. This is the girl who gave Taehyung trust issues. But also, this is the girl who lead to you and Taehyung meeting. In every way you look at it, she is the reason why you’re in each other’s lives in the first place. So you guess you owe her a thank you after you throw a drink at her.
Taehyung doesn’t speak much about her, or at all. It’s been years since their relationship anyway, and since all his ties to her have been cut, it makes perfect sense that he’s forgotten about her. Even at the beginning, he was adamant about not thinking about her, he said it had hurt too much to even say her name. And so you were always careful about not bringing the topic up in conversation; it was none of your business anyway, it wasn’t relevant to his life anymore. There were occasional jokes here and there, but only ever made by him, and even still, you could sense the underlying hurt.
“Taehyung, it’s been so long…” Her attention was utterly transfixed on Taehyung. You might as well have been a cardboard cutout for all that matters, she wouldn’t have noticed anyway. But it must be bewildering to run into your ex who you cheated on like this. Anyone would be thrown off.
What are the chances that, not only did you come to the same all-you-can-eat-sushi place, but have also been sat on the same booth? Just your luck.
Your eyes wander back to Taehyung, fearing for his current state of mind. Your roommate is an emotional guy, as much as he likes to mask it in ridiculous humour. It would not surprise you if he just stands up and leave right now, even with his food on its way. Yet his features are calm, unbothered, his initial surprise melting away to neutrality.
“Hm… Yeah.” He doesn’t ask how she fares as she’d expected, you can see the disappointed drop in her face at his apathetic souciance. Then he turns to you. “Did you order the stuff?”
Unsure of how to interpret his sudden maturity, you just nod slowly. Quiet Taehyung is scary…
Disregarding her friend’s apparent discomfort, Ryujin presses on. “It must have been, what, more than two years now? How are you?”
Why can’t this bitch take a hint? Just shut the fuck up and order your fucking sushi. Leave him alone.
But Taehyung remains unmoved. While you are the one quietly fuming in the corner. Sensing your aggravation, he brushes his thumb on your thigh soothingly. When you lock eyes again, you’re stunned to find him completely at ease, the corner of his mouth even perking up to reassure you that he’s fine.
“I’m doing well actually.” Ryujin frowns again at his short answer. You think she’s going to give up now, but then she continues.
“You look good.” You tense. Oh don’t she dare... “I’m not doing too bad myself, I-”
Just then, the waiter cuts off the monologue she was headed towards as he brings over the plates of food you’d ordered for Taehyung. His eyes immediately flash in excitement, resuming his usual childish manner as he peels his hand from your leg and snatches his chopsticks.
“Can I get anything for you two ladies?” The waiter asks Ryujin and her companion, whose face appears flushed from the awkwardness of this situation. Ryujin, evidently annoyed by the interruption, proceeds to order.
While her attention is diverted, you quickly take this opportunity to mouth to Taehyung, “you okay?”
Striking you with an honest smile as he swallows his sushi, he nods. “Yeah, don’t worry, completely fine. Eat your udon, or it’ll get cold.” His voice is hushed, and you don’t know why you get startled when he leans closer to whisper to you.
Not entirely convinced, it’s your turn to pat his leg, almost subconsciously, as if to make sure that this really is Taehyung, your Taehyung. How is he this calm right now? Well, he’s always been a silent sulker when he’s mad, but… He doesn’t even seem one bit troubled by the sudden appearance of his ex. Not even that eyebrow twitch he gets when he’s annoyed. And in the meantime, you’re silently plotting how to magically get wasabi in this bitch’s eye.
When the waiter leaves, Ryujin turns back to Taehyung once again, scanning his ethereal features and beautifully curled long hair. No doubt regretting her shitty decision of infidelity when they were together. Finally, her eyes flicker over to you, for the first time since Taehyung’s arrival. “So who’s thi-”
“Y/N, my girlfriend.”
You choke so hard on the fat noodle you are slurping that some of the savoury broth goes up your nose. Wheezing and spluttering for air like a cat choking on a hairball, you feel all your blood rush to your reddening face, both from the lack of air and the embarrassment. Taehyung’s careless whacks between your shoulder blades isn’t helping at all. Only after downing the whole cup of green tea does your coughing finally subside.
“You okay, babe?” Taehyung realises his smacks on your back are too harsh to be boyfriend-like, so he eases it into gentle rubs. But the concern in his large brown irises are genuine nonetheless.
You glare at him. Long, hard. Before nodding and flashing him a sickly-sweet smile. Oh boy, is he going to get kicked in the ass later for putting you up to this. He seems to see the dangerous flare of your nostrils, a warning sign that he has really, most fucking definitely, made the wrong move. He gulps and smiles back nervously.
Girlfriend? Girlfriend?!
What the fuck is he playing at right now? Why did he have to lie to her like that? Is he trying to make her jealous? Or just act like he’s moved on just fine without her? You clamp your mouth shut to prevent any angry words from tumbling out. There’s nothing to do but to play along right now - there’s an enemy to face.
“Oh right, girlfriend…” Ryujin says so softly that you almost feel bad for her before remembering that this is her own doing. “I guess that must be why you haven’t replied to my text asking you to meet up then… Right?”
At that, your entire body goes rigid.
She- Does that mean- Wh-
You look over at Taehyung, mouth hanging open in utter disbelief. Ryujin has been texting Taehyung. And he hasn’t mentioned a word about it to you. Although it really shouldn’t affect you so much, it feels like a stab of betrayal.
His lips are pursed again, as he gazes up at her reluctantly. “Yeah, that’s right.”
Then his arm circles around your back and pulls you into him, fingers gripping your waist in a display of possession. At the unforeseen momentum, and still in your state of shock, your frame falls feebly into his chest. Your heart leaps to your throat. You don’t understand why but… your cheeks feel hot.
His arm, around you. His hand, holding your side. His neck, pressed on your forehead.
You’re hyper aware of everywhere he is touching you. Why, all of a sudden?
“Oh okay, um, I really wish you all the best…” Ryujin mumbles, no longer looking at you and Taehyung anymore, not sounding one bit like she means what she’s saying. Her friend beside her has resorted to scrolling through her phone at this point, cringing from this awkward exchange.
“Thanks, Ryujin. I’m really happy - never been happier in my life, in fact.” The vibration of Taehyung’s Adam’s apple reverberates into you as he tugs you even closer, arm fastened around your middle. You struggle for room, bending your neck to peer up at him from your squished position.
He’s grinning radiantly at you, and at your wide-eyed confused expression, he can’t help but lean down to press his lush warm lips onto your forehead.
You blink.
Truly, you think your brain has stopped functioning. What is going on?
He’s definitely doing this to make Ryujin jealous. That is the only plausible explanation. It makes your chest clench in bitterness. Why does he still care what she thinks? This is completely unnecessary. Does he still care about her?
And why didn’t he tell you that she was texting him?
What has she been telling him?
All this doubt, this uncertainty, manifests into a suffocating lump in your throat. You have always been completely open and honest with each other about every aspect of your lives - family, friends, work, grades, relationships, sex. Not that he owes it to you to tell you everything, but you’d just thought that it was how things worked between you. What else is he hiding from you?
But at the same time, your focus can’t stray from the way he is holding you, and the confidence in his tone. How certain and sincere he sounded. And how he pecked you so casually in public, in front of everyone. Your stomach feels funny.
As you resume your eating, you stay quiet, thinking. On the other hand, Taehyung is quiet due to fact that he has no room to speak in between engulfing California Roll after California Roll. Happily humming under his breath as he chews. The waiter returns with a tray of food Ryujin and her friend had ordered. “Here you go, would you like some green tea?”
“Oo, can you fill mine up too please.” You hastily pass him your empty ceramic cup.
“Of course. Be careful, the tea is very ho-” Just as he warns you while he refills your cup, he over-tips the pot and sends scalding tea all over your hand.
“Ow!” Quickly drawing back your boiled hand out of instinct, you yelp out in pain. Fumbling over his sorry, I’m so so sorry’s, the waiter bows his deeply apologetically, scurrying to clean up the steaming spilled liquid in a panic.
“Mate, watch out!” Taehyung sits up immediately, scrambling to wipe your soaked hand with tissues. The glare he throws the waiter could cut through glass. “Are you okay?” The concern clouding his eyes when he faces you floods your veins with a security.
“Yeah… Don’t worry, it’s just a burn.” You watch him examine your hand intently as if it’s some ancient priceless artefact that could shatter from a poke; you’ve noticed lately that he tends to do this when you’re injured. With his fringe frizzed over his forehead, lips puckered in concentration as he caress over your pink tender skin, you are helpless and unmoving. Staring at him.
“Are you sure? It’s getting kind of red…” He refuses to let your hand go. Your fingers scorch under his touch and it’s not from the tea.
“Yeah, baby, I’m fine.” Taehyung’s head whips up instantly at the way you address him. Confused for a good second, before realising that it is to play along with the fake girlfriend narrative.
Right…
Reluctantly, he lets you pull your hand out of his clutch, and only when you pick up your chopsticks to prove to him that it’s only a minor injury does he resign in his coddling and return to his food. As you glance up, you notice Ryujin’s blazing glower at your direction. You quickly look away.
In the presence of his cheating ex-girlfriend, you two no longer feel at ease to banter away as normal. You aren’t even at the liberation to have a regular conversation without her listening in on everything. So the meal passes rather wordlessly.
However, the silence births a different kind of interaction between you and Taehyung. You can’t tell if it’s just for show, or due to his innate affectionate nature, but he suddenly feels the need to display his love for skinship. Under the table, his hand once again strays to the land of your thighs, gently stroking. When you shoot him a warning glare, lest he gets any vulgar ideas, you find that he possesses no lustful intent at all. Just pure fondness for you.
Something inside you softens. You’re starting to think that he isn’t acting out of spite against Ryujin, but rather simply enjoying your company as usual.
But you know what? Screw that bitch. Not once, to your knowledge, did she apologise to Taehyung when she’s had two years to own up to her mistakes. Not until now, of all times. She deserves to get riled up.
“Taehyung-ie, can I have a bite of your shrimp?” You smile at your pretend-boyfriend sweetly. He gives you a perplexed look that says: But I thought you hate shrimp? before he clocks on with your intention.
“Of course, baby.” And without fail, just like a scene straight from a drama, he picks up the tempura shrimp and feeds it to you, eyes crescent in mirth as you open up and take a mouthful like a hungry little child. You feel a crumb flake away onto your chin, yet before you can wipe it away, Taehyung reaches it first. Chuckling, he sweeps the small speck into your mouth. But not without the slightest, most fleeting, brush of his thumb against your tongue.
The action feels… intimate. Like weirdly intimate, even for you and Taehyung’s dynamic.
Why does your breath keep hitching?
Perhaps after a second too long, you conjure a giggle in response, attentive of Ryujin’s gawk in your periphery. “Thanks, love.” The syrup in your voice is sickly sweet. God, even you want to barf.
“You’re too adorable, honey buns.” Taehyung cups your face in one hand, fingers digging into your squishy cheeks as he shakes you. Your smile drops. Adorable? Honey buns? HoNEy bUnS? Kim Taehyung is so dead.
But before you could kick him in the shin under the table, he leans in and plants his lips on yours. Soft, supple.
Oh.
Just as you think it’s only meant to be a peck, he deepens the kiss, his plump pink mouth gliding over yours smoothly. Anyone who sees would know that you’re accustomed to such action with each other from the natural comfortable manner of your kiss. Anyone could tell that you’re used to each other’s lips.
You pull away abruptly when you become conscious of many’s attention on you. With your face so near his, all you can see is how his lips draw into a smirk.
It’s unusual for you two to kiss outside of a sexual context. Because why would you? Friends don’t kiss each other unless they’re: A) dating, or B) banging. And especially in the past few weeks, you’ve been progressively kissing each other less, even during sex. Almost as if you’ve both realised how intimate it is, and all the romantic connotations that come with it.
Yet here he is, kissing you so openly in public.
Yeah, it’s just for show for his ex. But it’s still…
You don’t know.
.
After Taehyung had finally eaten to his heart’s content, the two of you had gone to study in the library. Ryujin wore a sour face in the entire duration of the meal, and you would hear low grunts of irritation from her direction. You practically felt her venomous glare on the back of your head as you were leaving the restaurant. Acting has never been your strong suit, but even you’ll admit that the two of you are putting on an Oscar-worthy performance.
You’ve been quiet, you know. It’s because of that bitter taste in the back of your throat that you still can’t get rid of at the thought that Taehyung might still care about Ryujin. Why else would he lie to her and say that you’re his girlfriend if not to get a reaction out of her?
But more so, why does it bother you so much? You wish you don’t care this much for this stupid sushi-demolisher who doesn’t deserve your time and efforts. He’s probably thinking about his next meal again while you’re here lamenting over your weird feelings.
So you keep your mouth shut throughout your study session, brewing in your acrid thoughts.
Taehyung watches you nibble at the end of your pen. How is he supposed to focus on his coursework when you’ve got that pouty expression? And since when did you not take every chance you get to take the piss out of him? He wonders what’s going on in your head.
Seeing Ryujin had been a shock, a blast from the past. It hadn’t bothered him too much to be honest, he simply doesn’t care about her anymore. A few days ago, she had sent him a message out of the blue. Out of politeness, he’d responded but kept his replies brief; it was difficult to decipher her intention at first, but it soon revealed itself. Apparently, her and Jimin went on to date for a while - good on them, Taehyung truly could not give fewer shits anymore. But their relationship deteriorated due to their incompatibility, which was predictable knowing them both. It was when she started showing interest in Taehyung, apologising and kissing his ass about how good he was to her that he decided to stop answering.
The thought of getting back with her gave him shivers.
Your reaction to Ryujin back there wasn’t unexpected at all, of course you weren’t going to react mildly to his ex. Taehyung is lucky you didn’t ‘accidentally’ spill soy sauce onto her, or start yelling at her about faithfulness and morality. Your wrath towards her actually kind of warms his heart…
You aren’t one to talk about your feelings openly, but your actions definitely speak volumes about how much you care about him.
Taehyung smiles to himself.
There is so much loyalty between the two of you, complete trust and devotion. At the end of the day, no matter what goes on between you when you’re horny fuckers, you’re best friends above all else. Fighters for each other.
Your journey back home was also rather mute, consisting of him prodding you with jokes and teases, and you putting on a half-hearted smile. Maybe you’re annoyed at him for putting you on the spot and leaving you with no choice but to cooperate as his pretend girlfriend. All this relationship-y commitment-y crap repels the shit out of you. Basically the bane of your existence.
He probably shouldn’t have kissed and coddled you that much in front of Ryujin. You detest PDA like it’s some scandalous taboo, despite being the freakiest girl he knows in the sheets. But hey, you guys had to make it convincing and believable...
Yup, the more Taehyung thinks about it, the more he’s sure you’re annoyed (or even scared off) about the fake dating thing.
“You’re quiet for someone who just met her supposed archnemesis. I thought you’d be going on and on about what a bitch she is.” He glances at your sullen side profile for the hundredth time during your commute home.
“I don’t know, not it a great mood I guess? Probably just tired.” You mumble, searching for your keys in your coat pocket. The weather is getting cold these days; Taehyung knows your fingers are very prone to freezing, especially with your refusal of wearing gloves because ‘they’re ugly’ nor would you keep your hands in your pockets because ‘it’s a safety hazard incase you trip over’.
He gets a strangely overwhelming urge to hold your hands every time he sees you wiggling your fingers to warm them up. Hmm.
Wordlessly, you enter the house with him trailing behind you. He watches your moody steps from behind as you remove your shoes and head inside. Why can’t you just tell him what you’re thinking?
With a great sigh, Taehyung slumps onto the couch, focus still on you hanging your coat on the rack and tossing your keys into the holder on the shelf. “Hey.”
You turn, regarding his wide manspread with piqued interest. “What?”
“Come here, baby, sit on my lap.” He pats the top of his thighs in beckoning. Sometimes it’s like trying to get a stray cat to come to him.
Your eyes widen at his request. But very reluctantly, you stroll towards him until you’re standing between his extended legs. “Why are you calling me baby, we’re not pretending to be dating anymore.”
Taehyung stiffens as he senses the acrimony in your tone. So this is about the girlfriend thing? It’s a risky move but he sits up and pulls you in by the back of your thighs until you have no choice but to succumb to falling onto his hips. Lips still in a tight line, your limbs come around him to hold yourself upright. In order to prevent you from escaping, Taehyung encloses his arms around your waist, trapping you in his embrace. He tries not to think about how your crotch is directly on his right now.
“Why you sad?” He looks up at you, your eyes unreadable as always. Heat from your exhale fans his forehead.
“I don’t know. Nan molla.” You shrug and do that face scrunch thing you do whenever you’re unsure that he loves. It makes you look so cute.
“Hey…” Taehyung nudges your cheek with his nose in an attempt to get you to look at him. You have a habit of avoiding eye contact, and he knows it’s stems from the intimacy issue. “What’s up, honey buns?”
“Honey buns again? Seriously?” You jerk away from him like he insulted your mother or something.
“Well, since I can’t call you baby, honey buns it is.” His chest vibrates with his deep rumbling laughter, pleased with himself to see the slightest hint of a smile finally beginning to appear on you.
“Oh my god, Taehyung. Fine, just stick with baby, I swear…” You thump him on the back, yet your stone cold exterior now being invaded by a spark of humour.
“Good. Now tell me what’s wrong, baby.”
You’re quiet for a good few seconds, contemplating. Your legs around his torso tense, you bite your lip hesitantly. Come on, just talk to me, he wishes.
“Do you still… care about her?” Voice so soft that even he struggles to hear you this close.
“What? Ryujin?” Oh, so this is about her. Taehyung knew you hated her, but never thought that you would feel… insecure? Jealous, even? “Of course not. I don’t give a single fuck about her.” At his answer, you let out the breath you’ve been holding. A breath of relief? “But you clearly seem to care too much about her.”
“I- I do not!” In a tone of disbelief, you scorn. “I just- She’s not the one I care about.”
Fuck, you’re being too cute right now.
Taehyung pecks at your chin, unable to contain his affection anymore. You continue, “Plus, why didn’t you tell me she was talking to you again? Friends tell each other this sort of thing. I always tell you everything…”
The worry on your face is truly so endearing, he feels his chest constrict.
“I didn’t mention it because that’s how little I care. She is honestly so insignificant to me right now, I could not even be bothered to waste my breath bringing it up. Yes, she meant a lot to me for a period of my life. But. That was a long time ago. I’ve moved on, no thanks to you, remember?” Your eyes gradually dare loiter up his face. “You silly sausage.”
“But-” You’re pouting again. You need to stop pouting or he won’t be able to control himself, dammit. “Why did you lie and say I’m your girlfriend then, if you weren’t doing it to make her jealous.”
Taehyung blinks. Well… Um, about that... He didn’t want to have to explain it to you but...
“It just slipped out.”
Your turn to blink vacantly. Taehyung feels blood tinting his cheeks under your gaze. Even he doesn’t know why he said it back then. It just kind of… rolled off his tongue. Should he be worried? Yeah, he should definitely be worried.
When you still fail to say anything, he hurriedly asks, “Are you mad?”
“N-No. Why would I be mad?” The way your arm slides down his neck to brush pass his chest leaves his skin tingling. He pulls your legs closer around him, hand unintentionally trailing to your rear.
“I don’t know, you just hate that kind of lovey-dovey stuff. Just figured that you’d be annoyed that I forced you to act like my girlfriend.”
“Well, I was a bit annoyed… It’s not just me, you hate that kind of lovey-dovey stuff too!” Well, not exactly accurate, but Taehyung decides not to correct you. “But did you see her face?” Your tone begins to lighten. Remembering the acerbity tainting Ryujin’s features brings you amusement.
“She looked like she was going to murder someone.” You both laugh.
“She was thirsting over you like a hound, Jesus Christ. It’s because of your perm, trust me.” Grinning, you twirl his curly fringe around your fingers. You seem to do that quite often since he got the new hairstyle.
“Wow, you really like my perm that much?” He fishes, failing to control his forming smirk. You like to give him shit about his ego, yet no one strokes it more than you do.
“No comment.” You can’t contain your radiant smile either. Taehyung makes a mental note to keep the perm.
Seeing your mood lifted makes Taehyung feel much better, safer. His arms run up your back, and he feels you shudder under his touch. You fit into his embrace so well; it’s difficult to not hug you close to him every chance he gets nowadays. There’s a dull ache in the back of his neck from craning up to look at you for too long, but he doesn’t mind it. Your fingers fall from his hair, tracing his jaw frivolously, mindlessly. It leaves an unwarranted tremble within him.
“Look, there’s absolutely nothing for you to mull about in that overthinking head of yours. I don’t even remember Ryujin’s last name if I’m being honest with you. She lost me the moment she broke my heart, and I’ll never even remotely consider getting back with her. Ever. I promise.
“So don’t act all jealous and sulky just ‘cause you misunderstood. You’re my best girl. You’ll always be my best, favourite and only girl, understand? I, Kim Taehyung, belong to you, Y/N Y/L/N. Period.” The smile of satisfaction tells him everything. You’re not as hard to please as you appear to be. “I’m yours, happy?”
“Happy.” Fuck, Taehyung’s heart is going to explode from the joyous beam growing at your lips.
“Good, because she means nothing to me at all. But you, Ms. Needy-But-I-Won’t-Admit-It? You mean everything to me. Everything.” He bounces you on his lap for emphasis, eliciting another buoyant giggle from you.
Then you do something that you don’t normally do.
You kiss him - passionately and ardently. Fingers surfing the waves of his hair, you readjust your straddling position on top of him to minimise the distance. Taehyung feels all reason in his head incrementally ebbing away. You shouldn’t be kissing, you really shouldn’t. It’s not normal to make out with your best friend. But fuck the rules. Taehyung doesn’t want to stop kissing you right now, his silly adorable honey buns.
“Just admit it. You love me.” He taunts between breaths. You freeze at Taehyung’s words. Completely freeze on his lap, hand dangling from his face, as if you’ve been shot. “Like a best friend.” You deflate, evident relief at the joke.
Taehyung has to restrain from laughing out loud. God, you’re such an easy target. The second anything one step further from platonism is suggested, you act like you’re going to pack your bags and run for the hills. But here you are, kissing him and acting all possessive. He enjoys the irony.
“Yeah I love you. Like a best friend.” You flick the tip of his nose in reprimand for his teasing.
“Good because I love you too. Like a best friend.” He holds you tight against him, proceeding to blow raspberries in your neck.
Maybe even more, he wonders.
.
27/11/19
© Copyright 2019
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@taexxxiiaa @shookpreme @taetaeobsessed @tangledsparkles @nonexistentfucks @evilkookie @nbiased95 @taehyungmakesmeoof @itscalledgayhoney @tahaing @deliciouslydisturbed365 @expensive-bangtan-girl @jwlmnbt @herakimkim @dnyad @kaepjjang365 @expensive-bangtan-girl@gingerpeachtae @spring2787 @askingtheimportantthingshere @casualminiaturetimemachine @xblackclover13x @vasysauce @deadinsidebitch2412 @emiyooa @i-dont-even-know-fck @chimycthulhu @gixanjos @hisunshiine @xtaeyi @softjellyjimin @bluemooncnblue @malfeitofeitto @bangtanfancamp @keopitae
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fancifulwhump · 5 years ago
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Jaskier food poisoning while traveling with Geralt???
“Geralt.”
Jaskier’s voice is smaller than usual. It’s harder to hear him. That’s the only reason Geralt stops walking.
When he turns back to face his companion, Jaskier’s face has taken on a striking pallour. Geralt may not recall much about human physiology, but even he can tell that isn’t natural. A thin veil of sweat glistens on Jaskier’s brow; everything below that has faded to grey, a hue whose queasiness is only emphasized by the expression on Jaskier’s face. He looks like he just stepped in zeugl vomit.
Come to think of it…
“Are you going to be sick?” Geralt asks bluntly, crossing his arms.
Whatever Jaskier had been planning to say, that wasn’t it. Somehow Geralt feels like he just cut off the beginning of a long-winded monologue. “I — what? No. Why would you even think  —  honestly, Geralt. Really.”
Jaskier clears his throat, huffing off to the side as though Roach has personally offended him. If glaring at the horse is easier than meeting Geralt’s eyes, something really is wrong.
For a long moment, Geralt simply stares at him, inviting him to say whatever he was intending to… but, stubborn as he is, Jaskier remains quiet. Geralt knows from experience how long the bard’s silent treatment lasts — five minutes, tops. With a grunt, he concedes to Jaskier’s sulk, turning and continuing on their way down the path. Until Jaskier decides to pull his head out of his own ass or vomit off the side of the road, it’s not his problem.
That’s what he commits himself to, at least. Remembering it becomes harder as time drags on — minutes into hours, continuing through the humid woods with nothing but Roach’s hoofbeats to fill the silence. On any average day, this would be fine. Geralt would prefer it, really, to an hour filled with Jaskier’s inane chatter. But silence isn’t something Jaskier understands, and he definitely doesn’t practice it. Being alone with his own thoughts is one thing; having Jaskier hang over his shoulder, following for hours without saying a single word, is another. 
It’s unnatural. Unnerving. Like attending the wedding of a bride wraith —  everything appears fine, but one crucial element is very, very wrong, and it poisons the entire afternoon.
Sure, Jaskier keeping his mouth shut can’t compare to the bride trying to eat her groom, but… Geralt’s not the best at analogies.
A part of him wants to round on Jaskier and demand to know what’s wrong — but that might cause more problems than it’s worth. However awkward silence is, an argument would be worse. Eager to avoid it, Geralt does his best to glance back at Jaskier as infrequently as possible — just enough to ensure he’s still there — determinedly trudging ahead. Eager for a distraction, he keeps busy scanning the woods around them. Level terrain will suit, the more secluded the better. There’s no chance they’ll make it to the wights’ lair before nightfall, but they can at least find a safe spot to bed down for the night.
Finally, Geralt comes to a halt in a small clear area, carpeted with pine needles and fir. Under the cover of trees, they will not be visible from higher up on the mountain; and with rocks at their backs, there’s no chance of being snuck up on. It’s clearly the best choice — but traveling with Jaskier long enough has taught him that at least consulting his companion is the best thing to do, unless he wants to listen to Jaskier complain all evening.
“How’s here for tonight?” he asks, finally turning back to face Jaskier. Immediately, Geralt wishes he hadn’t.
Somehow, Jaskier pallor has only grown. He looks even worse now, a hellish grey, washed out and drained of all energy; beyond the slumped shoulders and lowered head, his jaw is tense, lips bleeding in places where they’ve been chewed nearly raw. Jaskier’s eyes scan the clearing, duller than they’ve got any right to be, before he looks back up at Geralt and offers a short nod.  “Uhh. Yeah, this works.”
Geralt stares at him. “You’ve got nothing to add?” Jaskier always has a complaint about wherever they end up camping. If the silence was unnerving, this is simply wrong.
Jaskier considers for a moment, scuffing his toe against the stone floor, before shaking his head. “Nope. It’s fine.”
Geralt doesn’t buy that for a moment. He continues staring for a beat too long, drawing his skepticism out until it’s practically strangling them both… until at last giving up, looking away with a grunt of acquiescence. No arguments here. If Jaskier doesn’t feel like whining (but that’s wrong, Jaskier always whines) he won’t look the gift horse in its mouth… no matter how uneasy it leaves him.
Setting up camp is quick work, made longer by Jaskier’s overall reluctance to help. He’s useless at starting a fire on a good day — but tonight, charged with arranging stones for a fire pit, he can hardly bring himself to focus on the task at hand. He meanders around, picking up rocks and discarding them after a few thoughtful seconds; if he moved any slower, Geralt might mistake him for a zombie. Occasionally he braces himself against a tree and simply stands there, eyes shut and face drawn. He draws shallow breaths into his lungs and seems to hold them, as if frightened to let them out; Geralt watches, half-fascinated, until he manages to recover.
It was the tuna, he’s decided by the time their packs are set up and a miserable fire pit has been assembled. Something about it smelled off last night, and Geralt had wanted to say as much… but Jaskier was already halfway done with dinner. To bring it up would have been to worry him needlessly for nothing. 
Of course, now it clearly isn’t nothing. While Geralt’s stronger stomach could handle the tainted food just fine, Jaskier hasn’t been so lucky.
Geralt snorts as the bard slumps down on a log, hunching in on himself with both arms around his stomach. For all his reluctance to voice his discomfort, Jaskier makes no attempt to hide it. He glowers after the ground, throat bobbing with each heavy swallow. A few times, his eyebrows draw together, and he exhales hard through his nose; where he might have been keeping quiet before to salvage his dignity, now Geralt seriously doubts Jaskier is able to open his mouth.
“If —“ Geralt begins, before stopping cold. Ask Jaskier about it again, and he’s just going to deny it. While acting as if Geralt’s insulted him. What’s the point inviting that? Instead, Geralt closes his mouth and leans back, regarding his companion unwaveringly. Jaskier’s shoulders are tense, his limbs drawn like taut bowstrings. He doesn’t even look up at the dropped question. Over the heavy silence, a low gurgle emanates from Jaskier’s stomach; he inhales sharply, pressing both arms in on himself, and doesn’t move a muscle.
By now, it’s impossible to look away. Geralt crosses his arms and leans forward, frowning. Jaskier has to break sometime. It’s inevitable. But the moments drag by, long and agonized, and he remains still as a statue. Either Jaskier is that stubborn or that optimistic, but Geralt can see things clearly: if Jaskier doesn’t get it up now, they’re both going to spend the rest of the night miserable.
Casually, he reaches towards his back and draws out a parcel wrapped in cloth. He hadn’t wanted to save last night’s leftovers, but Jaskier insisted. “Squirrel?” he asks, extending a piece of dried flesh Jaskier’s way. 
Jaskier reels, scrambles backwards over the log, and gags into the bushes.
Geralt tucks the squirrel away, victorious.
He tries to give Jaskier his privacy from there — some things he just doesn’t need to see. It’s more difficult when Jaskier finds his voice again. Apparently, nausea was the only thing holding it back, and the moment he’s unleashed the first torrent of partically-digested squirrel into the bushes, he remembers how to speak again.
“Geralt — oh gods — I feel awful, Geralt.”
Something Geralt surmised on his own.
“My stomach — hah-hah-uhhhh.” Jaskier belches, loud and queasy. Geralt can’t help making a face. “It’s turning inside out. Destroying itself. Help, Geralt.”
“Leave me out of this.”
“For the love of —“ Jaskier cuts himself off with a gurgle; his shoulders convulse, and he whips around just in time to avoid vomiting directly at Geralt. It’s all the unfortunate eavesdropper can do to remain where he is. Comforting Jaskier would be the nice thing to do… but he’s never been called nice in his life. Still, it seems a bit too rude to move to the other side of the fire, just to put some distance between the two of them.
“Do you, uhh —“ Geralt frowns into the flames once the latest round of gagging has died off. “Do you need anything?”
“A merciful death,” replies Jaskier, strangled.
“Right.” After a long moment, Geralt rises from his own log and treds carefully across the campsite. He’s not at all quiet, but Jaskier doesn’t look up until Geralt is standing right next to him, looming at his shoulder. Jaskier’s mouth opens, but instead of a question he only manages a sick hiccup.
“There. There, there.” Geralt’s hand lands on Jaskier’s back, which promptly shudders with another gag. Unsure of what else to do — of all the uncomfortable places life has taken him, this is somehow still a first — Geralt pats Jaskier’s back, lightly at first, then with more confidence as the sick man brings up another wave of sick.
The last thing he expects when Jaskier is done is for the bard’s full weight to slump against him. Jaskier moans aloud, dragging the back of his hand across his mouth. His other arm still cradles his roiling stomach, but at least he no longer looks a pin’s drop away from projectile vomiting. “That was hell,” he mutters, jolting with a silent hiccup. “Been feeling queasy all day, but I hoped… oh, gods. It was the squirrel, wasn’t it? It was the squirrel.”
Geralt, in a merciful mood, does not confirm the suspicion.
Jaskier moans, leaning back against Geralt’s legs. There’s sick on his shirt, and his bangs are glued to his sweat-soaked brow. For a moment, Geralt simply allows himself relief that it’s over. Then, another gurgle emanates from Jaskier’s raging stomach, and he realizes that no, it’s really not.
Humans are much more delicate than he realized… and more often than not, its an pain in the ass.
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mycasandstarrs · 6 years ago
Text
SPN 9x23: “Do You Believe in Miracles?”
THE ROAD SO FAR: Kicking ass, taking names. Ezekiel wasn’t who he said he was; he’s actually Gadreel, and he was working with Metatron. Metatron took Cas’ grace for a spell to cast angels out of Heaven. Abaddon. The Mark of Cain and the First Blade. Cas vs Metatron. Crowley was addicted to human blood. The Mark and Blade are affecting Dean. Metatron got Cas’ army to turn on him. Cas gave up his entire army for one man. Metatron’s power comes from the angel tablet. Dean is really going off the rails. Gadreel has come to help, Dean nearly kills him. 
(All set to “Carry on Wayward Son” by Kansas, as usual.)
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Sam defending Gadreel. Who’da thunk it?
“Something is wrong with you, Dean. And until we figure out what, this is where you have to stay.”
“And you two are gonna do what? Take on Metatron yourselves? That's smart. Oh, no, wait. No, you -- you lost your Angel army. And you -- now you're trying to lock up the one guy who has a shot at killing the son of a bitch! Hell of a plan, fellas!”
OH YOU WANT TO BE A DICKHEAD NOW?
That gave me flashbacks to Bobby’s panic room.
At least put the box away??
“Dean...wasn't wrong. My followers have abandoned us.”
“Yeah, and Gadreel says he can help us. From where I sit, that's more than an even trade.”
Gadreel is worth one entire army. I hope he realizes that.
Eww, Dean’s vomiting.
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He vomited blood, nonetheless! Always a good sign.
“So, uh, Metatron...Metatron...God?”
“Just a second.”
Oh, he’s that kind of asshole.
“You've just reunited all the angels under the banner of heaven. I mean, that's like...”
“Winning a People's Choice Award? Not quite the real deal, now, is it?”
Nice dig.
There’s our Chekvon gun: the mic that allows all angels to hear Metatron.
“Hello? This is Metatron.”
“More reverb.”
“Because I'm Lou Gehrig?”
I love that reference.
“I'd like to take a moment to welcome you all back. I want you to know how moved I am that you've accepted me as your new God. My heart, as they say, is full--” Of crap.
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“We're not here to hurt you.”
“No. Your Grace. Healing me will only weaken you.”
Cas healed Gadreel with no hesitation.
Has this what Crowley’s been up to?? Getting massages?
Dean managed to pry the doors to the dungeon open.
“What the hell's happening to me, you son of a bitch?” At least Dean showed concern about this situation.
“What I want is Metatron.”
“Go on.”
“But I have to get through that door, and I have to get to the blade. And you're gonna help me.”
Damn it.
Alright Sam, take deep breaths.
“Are you sure it was Crowley?” Yep.
“Well, Metatron is more powerful than ever, but if Dean has the First Blade and the mark, that might give us our best chance.”
“You're joking, right? An hour ago, we were ready to throw Dean into a padded cell, and now you say he's our best chance?”
“Hear him out, Sam.”
“Oh, right. Excuse me. Sorry, guys. Uh, sorry I'm a little less than eager to hear that our best chance is -- is arming the warhead and hoping it hits the mark. This is not a bomb we're talking about. This is my brother.”
This is so reminiscent of S4, when Sam was the warhead even Bobby wanted to arm if it meant killing Lilith. Sam’s vouching for protecting Dean the exact same way Dean did for him
Oh damn. RIP woman. Hit by a car.
“What can I get you fellas?”
“Coffee. Black.”
Jeez, Dean.
“Are you serious? You take this girl's table, her time, you spread out like an overgrown teenager, and for what? What's the tip on a single cup of Joe? A nickel?” That was sweet of Crowley.
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“Hell's fine. Hell's like a Swiss watch. Don't worry about hell. Hell's complicated.”
"’Game of Thrones’ is complicated. Shower sex -- that's complicated.”
A hell of a conversation going on.
“My problem is Metatron. Right now there's nothing. There's no angel smitings, no crazy acts of God, no vermin, hail. If Metatron's making his move on earth, he is taking his sweet-ass time.” No, he’s being subtle about it, unlike Godstiel and his mass killings and healings.
Metatron can’t pull off puppy dog eyes.
“You're not gonna eat your food?”
“Not hungry.”
A huge red flag.
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“How we might convince them to let us pass.”
“Wookie.”
!!!
“Brother, I have no idea what that means.”
“It's a reference to a very popular film that -- never mind.”
Cas finally gets to be on the other side of explaining a pop culture reference to someone.
Sam beat Dean to the punch.
“I guess one of us doesn't need a demon to help follow a clue trail.” b u r n
“I just thought you might like to know that while you two have been playing, uh, odd couple, your real friends, like Cas, like the angel you stabbed, Gadreel --they're out there right now, risking their asses to help you win this fight.”
“What the hell are you talking about?”
“A fight, I might add, you made that much more complicated when you decided to stab the one angel who could actually get us to Metatron.”
“You mean the angel that took you for a joy ride? The angel that slaughtered Kevin? That angel?”
WILL YOU LET HIM TALK, DEAN.
“Please, when you say you don't want to explain anything to me, don't. I get it. And I also get that Metatron has to go. And I know you're our best shot to do that.” Unlike Dean in S4, Sam is arming the warhead.
“If this is it, we're gonna do it together.” Sam “teamwork” Winchester.
“Excuse me. I'm not exactly demon Minion number three here. As the kids say-” 
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lol
“Look, I don't know what you expected here, okay. I don't really care, but you wanted off the hamster wheel. Get off.”
“Well, I guess I've been Winchestered.”
Our first look at Heaven’s portal.
c r a p
“Welcome to heaven's jail, Castiel. I believe Gadreel can give you the tour.”  Screw you, Ingrid.
I will now like to take donations for “Give Gadreel a Hug”.
“He's a fraud!”
“I'm afraid I don't know what you mean, good sir. How can one be a fraud when one offers nothing? A little love, a little hope, the occasional miracle -- nothing more.”
“You know exactly what I mean...Metatron.”
PUT HIM ON BLAST, UNKNOWN ANGEL.
“Who here has the gift that this man has?” The unknown angel, if Metatron hadn’t cast him down and taken most of his powers away.
My stomach is in knots. I always hated this. All these people are going to hell, especially George.
RIP unknown angel. Killed by George.
How do we still have 19 minutes left???
“Are you ready to gut this bitch?” Aww, Sammy.
“Sorry, little brother. It's not your fight.” DAMN IT DEAN.
“Nothing you say matters.”
“Would you rather I not try at all?”
“Not if you can't prove it.”
HANNAH P L E A S E.
Yeah, y'all won’t be forgiven for beating and killing an innocent man.
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“Of reclaiming my good name. I thought of nobody, no cause, other than my own.”
“You’ve been redeemed, my friend.”
Not yet, not fully.
“The only thing that matters in the end is the mission -- protecting those who would not and cannot protect themselves --the humans. None of us is bigger than that. And we will not let our fears, our self-absorption prevent us from seeing it through. Not anymore...Move to the other side of your cell, Castiel, and keep your head down.
When they say my name, perhaps I won't just be the one who let the serpent in. Perhaps I will be known as one of the many......who gave heaven a second chance. Run, sister.”
Gadreel’s last words.
RIP Gadreel. Killed himself to give Heaven a second chance.
“Most people -- even the real belly crawlers living in filth...Or Brentwood...They don't want to be cynical. They just want something to believe in.”
“And that’d be you.”
“Why not me?”
There’s a list, buddy.
The sickly yellow lighting on Dean’s face...
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Cas and Metatron both wanted to be a better God than God.
“I'm blaming you for Kevin! I'm blaming you for taking Cas' Grace. Hell, I'm blaming you for the Cubs not winning The World Series in the last 100 freaking years.” Give it a couple more years on that last one.
My stomach already hurts; I know what’s coming.
“Well, here's a news flash -- humpty and dumpty are starring in their very own version of ‘Locked Up Abroad: Heaven’ right now.” They don’t know that Cas escaped.
I’d been looking forward to this fight, looked forward to Metatron getting his ass kicked...I had the highest hopes for Dean to win...and it went so badly, so quickly.
Haul ass, Sam!!
I want them to hurry up...but I know how this ends.
The look on Dean’s face when he sees Sam...that’ll haunt my dreams.
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Cas finds the Angel Tablet one second too late. 
NOW, SAM.
Cas breaks his third word of God.
“The Angel tablet -- arguably the most powerful instrument in the history of the universe -- is in pieces, and for what again? Oh, that's right -- to save Dean Winchester. That was your goal, right? I mean, you draped yourself in the flag of heaven, but ultimately, it was all about saving one human, right? Well, guess what. He's dead, too.” 
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After all these years...I can’t stand to see Dean like this.
Cas has learned that one of the most important people in his very long life is dead...and he still carries on with the plan to stop Metatron. Tears in his eyes, and everything.
“What happened with you being okay with this?”
“I lied.”
I knew it.
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The angel blade with Dean’s own blood on it.
“You know, why you could never quite pull it together, Castiel? While you're sitting here with Your Grace slowly burning away and your reputation long extinguished? No curiosity. You didn't read enough. You never learned how to tell a good story.”
“But you did.”
FUCK YES.
“I'm proud of us.” Dean’s last words.
RIP Dean Winchester. Killed by Metatron. Death #4.
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“You're doing the right thing -- letting him live. It's what a leader would do.”
“I'm no leader, Hannah. I never was. I just want to be an angel.”
“Can’t Find My Way Home” by Blind Faith.
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Sam had to carry Dean’s body to the Bunker and to his room.
Crowley came on his own accord.
On first viewing, I was crying so much I barely paid attention to Crowley’s monologue and I didn’t even care. Dean was dead.
“But...there is one story about Cain that I might have... forgotten to tell you. Apparently, he, too, was willing to accept death, rather than becoming the killer the Mark wanted him to be. So he took his own life with the Blade. He died. Except, as rumor has it, the Mark never quite let go. You can understand why I never spoke of this. Why set hearts aflutter at mere speculation? It wasn't until you summoned me... No, it wasn't truly until you left that cheeseburger uneaten...that I began to let myself believe. Maybe miracles do come true.”
...Up until this point.
“Listen to me, Dean Winchester, what you're feeling right now -- it's not death. It's life -- a new kind of life.” A horrible life.
“Open your eyes, Dean. See what I see. Feel what I feel. And let's go take a howl at that moon.”
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A real “eye opening” ending, screw you, Jensen.
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mammasapling · 8 years ago
Text
Prologue - Part 5: Enter the Headmaster
Those who had been swimming hadn’t been given the chance to change so were all barefoot and wearing their clothes over their swimsuits. Jana hadn’t actually seen the park yet and she was sure that, in the sunshine, it was a beautiful place. It would be perfect to run around at night. The bronze statue in the centre looked incredible and was probably an awe inspiring sight but in the current dim light, it looked menacing and intimidating. The park in general held a menacing aura now. Jana caught up to Sonia as Usami called out into the empty park. She was about to make sure her friend was alright when she heard a strange laugh. ”Upupupupupupu!” Jana turned her head wildly, trying to pinpoint where the sound was coming from only for the voice to maniacally laugh again. ”Aaaahahahahahahahahah!” The statue? Once again, she turned out to be correct as a black and white teddy bear leapt up from behind one of the bronze creatures and greeted them all with a smile. At least... The white half was smiling. The black half was grinning insanely. Was her handbook still on detect speech? Okay Japanese speech to English text was what she needed right now. ”Why hello there! Thank you all for waiting so patiently~” The bear said.
 It spoke so politely but Jana felt nothing but fear listening to him. Why was she so frightened? He was just a stuffed toy like Usami... But Usami wasn’t just a stuffed toy and while she was harmless, there was no telling what this one could do. ”I am Monokuma, the headmaster of this academy!” That couldn’t be right. Surely the headmaster would be a person? ”And now that I’ve made my dashing appearance, I’ve only got one thing to say to you all.” Monokuma jumped down from the statue and began pacing in front of the gathered students. “This little trip of yours... Is so friggin’ lame! The lamest!” ”Ooooo just as I thought... It’s you!” Usami angrily told Monokuma, holding her sceptre ready to use it. “But how? Why are you here?!” ”Shut up, you!” He snapped at the rabbit before turning back to the student’s, red eye glinting in irritation and plushie body tense. “Now as for the rest of you... Your lukewarm attitude is making me want to vomit. It makes me livid! Heart throbbing school trip? What is this crap, anyways? I’m bored! So knock this crap off right now!” ”Oh I’ll knock something off alright.” Jana muttered under her breath only to receive a whispered scolding from Sonia. ”We’ve got world demands to meet, ya know! No one wants to see happy peaceful teenagers! They wanna see misery and despair.” Did this bear ever shut up? Thankfully, he stopped his little monologue as Fuyuhiko decided to pipe up, looking pretty mad himself. ”T-The hell’s up with this stuffed animal? Nothing he’s saying makes any damn sense!”
  Usami stepped forward towards Monokuma. “Be careful, class, leave this to me and please stand back.” ”Usami, are you sure?” Jana asked slowly. ”As long as I have my Magic Stick... I don’t know why Monokuma is here but I will keep you all safe.” Usami didn’t stand a chance. She was so busy reassuring the class that Monokuma leapt towards her with a roar. The students watched as the two stuffed animals exchanged blows... Or rather, Monokuma beat the stuffing out of the rabbit, taking her sceptre and smashing it under his paw. ”Noooooo!” Usami cried. ”Victory! Now... How to celebrate such a flawless victory.” He leaned down to the rabbit, the grin on his black half getting even wider. “First of all, white rabbits are waaaaaay too plain~” She could see Usami shaking in fear. ”Sooooo I’m going to remake you in my image! Ahahahah~” Was that even possible? Jana didn’t really have time to think about it as Monokuma pounced on Usami again. This fight was even more one sided as Monokuma pinned her down and both of them disappeared in a cloud of cartoon like smoke only for things like screws, bows and the occasional nappy went flying. ”Will you keep still?!” Monokuma snapped. “This piece isn’t going to shove itself in, ya know!” ”Nooooo!” Usami squealed. “That’s a no-no. That’s a big no-no!” But it was no use. The smoke and dust cleared and Usami was no longer a white rabbit The bow on her ear had stayed but she was now pink and white, reflecting Monokuma’s black and white with the eye on her pink half now bright red. But at least it was still round and somewhat friendly; Monokuma’s right eye looked a bit like a red bat. Embarrassingly, Usami was now also walking around in a nappy. ”Noooooo! Change me back to normal!” Usami cried, tears pouring out of her eyes. Could stuffed animals really cry? ”Ooooohhhh? Defying your big brother’s fashion taste? Are you a trouble maker, Monomi~?” Monokuma asked, sounding almost innocent apart from that constant something in his voice that made Jana want to back away several feet. ”W-what? B-big brother? Monomi?” Usami asked through hiccups and small sobs. ”Mhm. Your current position is so wishy-washy so you are now my little sister~” ”Hey!” Usami yelled back, already mimicking the way Monokuma moved. “Why do I have to be the younger one?!” ”That’s not really the point...” Jana whispered. ”Jana, you really should stay quiet and not draw attention to yourself right now.” Sonia reminded her. ”But-” ”Jana!” ”Fine.”
~ ~ ~
“So that’s how it’s gonna be~” Monokuma said with a finality in his voice and that glint returning to his red eye as he held up a paw threateningly. Jana has missed part of their conversation while being told off by Sonia. “And from now on, Monomi, if you ever disobey me, I’ll never forgive you!” ”Oh, if only I still had my magic stick. I could have beaten awful Monokuma.” Usami mourned. Her confidence and playful nature was completely gone. ”It’s your fault for leaving yourself open~” Monokuma taunted. “Even the smallest opening can mean life or death on the battlefield~” Annoyingly, Jana had to agree with him on that point but only that one. ”What’s with this stupid performance?!” Fuyuhiko snapped. She really wished he hadn’t. It was one thing to whisper to yourself like she had been doing because at least for a while, Monokuma hadn’t been paying attention to them. But now... Now they were in for it. ”Who friggin’ knows.” Akane responded to Fuyuhiko. ”Whatever this is, it’s obvious something bad is happening.” Chiaki added, looking in worry towards Usami. ”W-Wha’? What is this? What’s going on?” Teruteru piped up, shaking in his clothes much more noticeably than when Jana threatened him earlier. ”And now she looks all weird.” Mahiru added, mimicking Chiaki and looking at Usami but not using her name. Why? Her name was Usami, not Monomi. ”She looks like me now and you don’t like it? How insensitive.” Despite the phrasing and the way he hung his head, Jana doubted Monokuma truly felt hurt by Mahiru’s words. ”Aaaaaahhh! There’s more of them!” Ibuki screamed. ”Wh-What does this mean for us? What exactly is that black and white demon?” Peko asked, intense gaze focused on the bear. ”Hey, I’m not a demon! I’m a bear, Monokuma!” ”I-I don’t really get it but now... There’s another stuffed animal?” Kazuichi said aloud, maybe he was just thinking out loud? It sounded like something he was probably meaning to keep inside his head. “And it’s talking? How is that possible?” ”Grrr... I am not a stuffed animal! I am Monokuma, the Headmaster of Hope’s Peak Academy!” Monokuma grumbled to himself for a few moments as various students tried to understand how this... Thing could be their headmaster. ”Anyway.” Monokuma continued. “You’ve all gathered. And as headmaster, I have a formal declaration to make. From this point on, the killing school trip shall now commence!” The... The what? ”S-Sonia... Could you please double check this was translated correctly.” Jana asked, gaze transfixed on Monokuma in outright terror as she held out her handbook to her friend. Sonia didn’t take it. She was even paler than before at the statement. ”N-no you really did just read that. T-this has become a killing school trip according to Monokuma.” ”A school trip where everyone gets along is just so damn boring! So let’s begin this killing school trip with you, the contestants~” No one could move or even speak for a few moments there until Teruteru spoke. ”U-us? Killing contestants?” ”NO!” Usami yelled, breaking herself out of her misery and stepping towards Monokuma. “I will not allow a bloody event such as this!” But Monokuma didn’t care one bit. His leg snapped up and hit her straight in the face, sending the rabbit flying. ”Usami!” Jana cried out ”OW!” Usami yelled as she went flying. “It hurts when you kick me!” ”Oh Monomi, you have such a small brain. How many times do I have to tell you?” He wasn’t even using her proper name and he’d just hurt her. Yes the rabbit was suspicious and had taken them away from the school but she was harmless! She was making sure they were alright! Jana clenched her fists, biting back the urge to growl and attack Monokuma herself. She couldn’t let anyone see that and besides, who knew what the consequences would be? ”Unless it’s a manga, the little sister is never more intelligent than the big brother.” Usami soon went back to her moping.
 “We got off topic there for a while, so allow me to explain the new trip rules~” Monokuma stated, totally ignoring the rabbit. ”W-what do you mean, k-killing school trip?” Mikan fearfully asked. She was another one Jana wanted to protect and she would definitely do so in the future. Mikan was always so skittish but this was the most tense she had seen the nurse all day. ”Isn’t it obvious? You guys are gonna try to kill each other.” What?! Kill each other! But... Animals was one thing but other people?! Jana couldn’t do it. There was absolutely no way she was capable of that. ”Oh, I see.” How was Kazuichi so calm?! “KILL EACH OTHER?!” He screeched. Jana would be impressed at how high his voice went if the situation weren’t so dire. ”An island life where you can’t leave unless you all get along is kinda boring, don’t you think? So now I want to change the rules! If you want to leave the island... Kill one of your friends! And then survive the class trial without being identified as the killer!” Monokuma instructed, laughing with insane glee as the teeth on the black half became pointed. They had to kill someone among them and not get caught? Commit a perfect crime? How could they?! Why should they?! ”Class trial?” Chiaki asked slowly. ”Thaaaat’s right~ The class trial is the real charm of the trip! Allow me to explain more clearly. If one of you gets murdered, all surviving members must take part in the class trial. The killer will of course, be among you. It will be a big debate showdown between the blackened student and the other spotless students. You will present your arguements as to who you think the blackened is and then vote. The outcome will be based on the majority. Should you arrive at the correct answer, only the killer will be punished and the rest of you may enjoy your island life. But be warned, choose poorly... The killer will be the only survivor and the rest of you receive the punishment~” Only survivor? That... Didn’t sound good. That sounded like death was involved in the punishment. ”So, get away with murder and you’ll live and get to leave this island~” Monokuma added as one final statement. Death was involved in the punishments! She was right! ”What exactly is the punishment?” Kazuichi asked slowly. He was as pale and tense as the rest of the class and sounded as if he didn’t really want to know. But they all had to know exactly what they were facing. ”Oh well basically, it’s an execution.” The bear spoke so calmly and casually about it, as if it were just a short detention. He would murder the student who was found guilty of murdering another student... He was mad! Jana’s free hand sought ought Sonia’s wrist, just to make sure she wasn’t dreaming. She could feel her friend shaking in her loose grip. ”E-execution?” Sonia asked fearfully. Both girls yelped as Monokuma was suddenly in front of them, leering up at them, red eye glinting madly. ”The pleasing punishment that follows the class trial~ It’s one of the perks of the killing school trip! Upupupu, what kind of spine chilling punishments will we see~? I’m already getting excited! There might even be some unique ones... Like impaling your head through an arcade machine claw!” He told them gleefully before heading back to his spot in front of the statue. Jana felt a little sick at the mental image he’d given them. ”Now, any method of killing is fine.” The bear went on to list them but Jana tuned him out, she couldn’t listen to any more of this. She was scared and nauseous and wanted to go to sleep or just run somewhere. Anything to work all this off. She looked around, in front and behind her. Everyone looked scared and pale but all seemed to be denying the idea that they would kill someone. She snapped out of it when Sonia tapped her arm. ”You should listen... He seems to have a reason for us to want to kill each other.” Sonia’s voice was so quiet and shaky. She could hear it crack every so often. Her friend was as terrified as she was. Akane, Nekomaru and Peko were all in fighting stances, facing Monokuma. Peko was the only one with a weapon, reaching for the sword strapped to her back. ”You want force? I’ll fight back with force!” Monokuma growled at them all before turning his back on them and facing the statue. “Surge, O gods who dwell between light and darkness. In accordance to our contract, I summon thee now! Come forth, Monobeasts!”
~ ~ ~
At first, all was silent but then the statue rumbled and cracked to reveal five huge metal beasts all surrounding Monokuma. Sonia and Jana took several steps backwards, as did most of the class. Some silently, some gasping and others screaming. Jana couldn’t understand; this was supposed to be peaceful but now something had come out of nowhere and turned their already strange reality onto its head. She seemed to have totally zoned out again as suddenly, Usami was suddenly standing in front of them, tiny arms out stretched as if to shield them from the beasts and Monokuma... Monokuma was on the metallic beast with wings, screaming about punishment time. The winged beast stretched out  revealing several gun turrets, aiming them all at the tiny rabbit. She was hit with bullet after bullet, and Jana could only watch, frozen in place by fear and her own senses being overloaded by the noise and the brightness of each shot. One bullet stayed too close to her and Sonia and she quickly pulled her friend out of its path. Sonia hadn’t even seen it but then, Jana’s eyes were better than most. There was soon nothing left of the rabbit except a little bow covered in bullet holes floating down before coming to rest on the park’s pavement. ”U-Usami?” Jana mumbled in complete shock, neither seeing nor smelling any sign of the rabbit. The class was in uproar, all yelling out in fear and asking what the hell was going on. There was at least a little amusement from Jana as she saw that Gundam kept hamsters in his scarf but even they were frightened. Monokuma was just cackling and saying... Something. Jana had long since put away her handbook, she didn’t care what anyone said right now and why should she?! She’d just watched a gorgeous day become the beginnings of a fight for survival. She’d witnessed the death of a teacher figure who’d been kind of annoying but totally harmless. And anyway, Sonia would probably fill her in later... Or tomorrow. Everyone looked so tired and frightened and pale. Today had been so draining first from the excitement and then from the fear and the danger presented to them. Jana was tired too, her body felt heavy but at the same time, there was this big ball of anxiety in her chest and too much adrenaline running through her to be able to just go to sleep. She could see everyone staring at each other... Had someone said something? Jana wasn’t really in a good state of mind to bother following the conversation with her handbook.
~ ~ ~
Sonia tugged at her arm, leading the two of them back along the bridge to the first island and towards the cottages they’d seen by the hotel. There were little nameplates on each of the letterboxes now and Sonia stopped outside of her own one, dully wishing Jana a good night and pointing her to her own cottage. Across from Sonia’s own and then two doors to the right. Jana headed there, heading inside and spending all of a minute just sitting on the comfortable bed. She couldn’t just stay still, she had to move, she had to stop thinking about Usami’s death and the fact that leaving the island meant killing someone else. Jana slipped off her jacket, boots and left her e-handbook on the little table beside her bed before quietly heading back outside into the night air. She turned to face the hotel, intending to just walk that way to get to... Well Jana didn’t actually know where she wanted to go. All she knew was that she couldn’t sleep and her thoughts were racing out of control and she just needed some space to think and calm down. Hajime was there by the pool. Sitting hunched over something and looking about as troubled as she was. While she wanted to go and comfort him as he seemed like a nice enough boy, Jana had to put herself first this time.
 Turning silently back towards the cottages, she jogged down the path that separated the boys from the girls and kept going towards a large brick wall with a gate that was currently locked for the night. Didn’t matter to her. Jana put as much power into her legs as she could and jumped, grabbing the gate’s handles and pulling herself up to grab the top then dropping down the other side. Back onto the beach. Jana kept jogging for a few moments, waiting until she was hopefully out of view of the camera before breaking into a full out run. She ran faster than any person, bare feet hitting the sand hard but she didn’t mind the sensation. Her grey eyes became a rich golden amber and black veins crawled up her face and along the backs of her hands as she ran and left the cottages and the cameras behind. Then suddenly, instead of human feet, red furred paws were impacting the sand. Instead of a red haired person running along the coast, the silhouette of a lithe and powerful wolf was running across the night time horizon and towards the bridge leading to Jabberwock park. Jana didn’t slow down as she crossed the wooden bridge, she didn’t slow until she was within the park once again when she screeched to a halt and started to sniff the air. A scent. She wanted a scent. She was determined to find somethi- there! There by the statue! She was hunched a little as she approached, sniffing cautiously and ears pricked to take in any sounds that might be a cue to run. But she reached the little perforated bow without any trouble and let out a loud, mournful howl before shifting back to her human form in the blink of an eye. There was no flash of light, no smoke, no complicated transformation sequence, she was simply a human in one breath and a wolf the next. Jana picked up the bow, holding it close to her chest before gently tucking it into her jeans pocket and running back, remaining human so she didn’t lose her little treasure.
 Once back at her cottage, Jana found all of the things she’d packed for Hope’s Peak and found her favourite light pajamas. Usami’s bow was placed in a drawer in her bedside table and Jana finally found it in her to drift into an uneasy sleep.
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