#(omg stop it's probably been a year by now wow)

[thyme-in-a-bubble]

okay also, 'I need coffee in an IV' please??? could you make us a little lumberjack!james moodboard pretty please :') i want to see our life with him!! orrr if that doesn't strike you, maybe one that's hopper themed?? hnngh need that big hairy man <3

| join my 3.5k celebration! |

[astonmartinii]

day ten: three (un)wise men | lando norris social media au

pairing: lando norris x fem piastri reader

christmas time is the one time of year oscar has some peace and quiet away from his teammate... or at least it was

MASTERLIST | TIP JAR

yourusername

liked by alexalbon, georgerussell63 and 671,209 others

tagged: landonorris

yourusername: the piastri house just got a bit busier

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user2: just take me out back and put me out of my misery

user3: add me to the list

oscarpiastri: i think you'll find it was quite busy enough

yourusername: boring, get a new routine bozo

oscarpiastri: i am not wholly opposed to this relationship but that was before he invaded our house and got mum to get rid of all of my salmon

landonorris: i am ALLERGIC

oscarpiastri: that's such a lie ???

landonorris: your mum believed it

oscarpiastri: you're just letting him lie to mum @yourusername

yourusername: he didn't lie he just embellished the truth

oscarpiastri: i'm telling mum we've just thrown out perfectly good salmon

landonorris: NOOOOOO

yourusername: well this isn't dramatic at all

oscarpiastri: @zakbrownceo lando just pushed me down the stairs

landonorris: snitches get stitches

oscarpiastri: i probably already need some :(

yourusername: you're literally fine osc let's stop being dramatic please

user4: my new years wish is to be in a relationship like theirs

user5: i think i would do anything at this point

user6: in brother's best friend we believe

oscarpiastri: BEST FRIEND?

landonorris: wow osc tell me how you really feel

oscarpiastri: i mean i like you, i tolerate your relationship with my sister but i draw the line at saying you're my best friend

logansargeant: logan sargeant erasure for sure

user7: so like now y/n is done with her degree will we get her in the paddock more

mclarenf1: not if this is what happens when she's around

user8: it's funny?

mclarenf1: oscar got thrown down the stairs over fish?

user9: they're called the three unwise men for a reason

landonorris

liked by oscarpiastri, carlossainz55 and 893,209 others

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landonorris: first christmas down under

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user10: why is this actually making me want a hot christmas?

user11: if it seems so wrong why do i want it to be right?

user12: i can't be sweaty while eating christmas dinner sorry

yourusername: that's not necessarily true

landonorris: oh! yes... hehehehe

oscarpiastri: SHUT THE FUCK UP

yourusername: why are you in our business ?

oscarpiastri: you're making it my business

landonorris: and how would we be doing that?

oscarpiastri: you're cuddled up like two ft away from me, giggling very loudly and saying 'what you gonna say to that osc'

yourusername: us? never!

oscarpiastri: i'm going to tear out my hair before the end of christmas

yourusername: with that forehead? no you won't

oscarpiastri: life was so peaceful when you went to lando's for christmas

landonorris: it might have been peaceful but you did miss us ... the phone logs prove it

user13: they gotta be so annoying for the other piastris

user14: idk i think they're like puppies that have to get all of their zoomies out and then just pass out on the couch

user15: more like lando and y/n are the big bumbling dogs and oscar is the one unimpressed cat who will on occasion chase their tails

carlossainz55: and yet you never made the short trip to spain... makes you think

yourusername: i'm way cuter than you

carlossainz55: is it just a piastri thing to be annoying

oscarpiastri: excuse me?

carlossainz55: you heard me the first time

yourusername: this is a crazy hill to die on considering lando will be a piastri in the near future

oscarpiastri: he basically already is

landonorris: omg i knew you guys loved me

carlossainz55: ew?

oscarpiastri

liked by yourusername, landonorris and 1,204,377 others

oscarpiastri: you know what they were right to call us the three unwise men because why did i come down to get a glass of water to see lando under the tree in nothing but a ribbon i NEED all three of us dead at this point

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user17: exsqueeze me?

user18: lord i have seen what you have done for other people

user19: my only thing is ... lando doesn't seem the most flexible how did he do the ribbon bows himself ...

maxfewtrell: most traumatic facetime of my life

yourusername: you can be angry about this, i personally do not give a fuck

oscarpiastri: that much is clear

yourusername: lando made it very clear that we had bagsied the living room for the evening

oscarpiastri: you have a christmas tree in your room? why didn't you do that there?

yourusername: you have an en suite you could've gotten a glass of water from there?

landonorris: i think i know the issue here

oscarpiastri: oh please do share your wisdom

landonorris: you seeing me like that changed something inside of you

landonorris: are you having an identity crisis osc?

oscarpiastri: no?

yourusername: good! he's mine!

oscarpiastri: i was in shock because i saw my future brother in law 90% naked on my living room floor

landonorris: i can see that

yourusername: omg look at us we're so good at talking it through - therapy who?

alexalbon: PLEASE STILL GO TO THERAPY DEAR LORD

oscarpiastri: i will defo still be talking to my therapist about this

user20: i know the caption is traumatising but also lets have a second to think about how oscar has just posted three memes of himself

oscarpiastri: i have a very expressive face i gotta use it

maxverstappen1: wowwowowow lando is stooping low for the mental games this season

maxverstappen1: let it be known lando, gay chicken is not very effective in psychological warfare

landonorris: okay?

maxverstappen1: it will just take your love away from you ....

landonorris: i don't want osc? i am very happy with the piastri i have

yourusername: i am the best piastri :P

oscarpiastri: i'm gonna ignore the whole slander in the comment above but are we all ignoring how max is lamenting over his loss of daniel?

yourusername: i think we should just leave him to it ....

yourusername

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tagged: landonorris

yourusername: i got my present this year, yes ribbon included

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user21: slowly but surely you guys are pushing me into my hater era

user22: if you're gonna brag about it can we at least get some photgraphic evidence

user23: PRETTY PLEASE

yourusername: that's for my eyes only

oscarpiastri: and mine apparently

landonorris: i gotta spoil my girl

alexalbon: but from what oscar's post says the present was you?

landonorris: well yes!

alexalbon: wow that must be disappointing i'm sorry @yourusername

yourusername: i can assure you i was very happy with my gift

landonorris: see alex !!!!

landonorris: i also got y/n other gifts

alexalbon: i should think so considering i've seen you in changing rooms :/

georgerussell63: another woman disappointed on christmas, not very feminist of you lando

landonorris: NO BODY SHAMING ON CHRISTMAS

landonorris: also WHAT?

user24: poor lando - he can't escape the bullying from alex and george even on christmas

user25: it's good entertainment tbf

oscarpiastri: i'm glad my trauma was a nice gift for you

yourusername: ur still whining about that?

oscarpiastri: yes i will whine until i die it was TERRIFYING

landonorris: you can keep complaining

landonorris: but i'll do it again next year

oscarpiastri: cool you can traumatise YOUR family instead

landonorris: oh you'll be there

oscarpiastri: huh?

yourusername: you guys are all coming to somerset next year!!!

oscarpiastri: i didn't consent to this?

yourusername: we can't split up the three unwise men :(

landonorris: please osc :(

oscarpiastri: fine.

landonorris

liked by maxverstappen1, yukitsunoda0511 and 982,309 others

tagged: yourusername & oscarpiastri

landonorris: no shrimps on the barbie at christmas i am very disappointed

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user27: didn't they throw out all the fish when lando arrived...

user28: let's sit back and watch oscar vs lando part 289 since christmas started

oscarpiastri: you raise a GREAT POINT

oscarpiastri: i got thrown down the stairs for no point?

landonorris: i fought you in self defence?

oscarpiastri: i didn't have any fish in my hands? STOP VICTIM BLAMING

landonorris: actually it was only like three steps

oscarpiastri: three steps constitute stairs

landonorris: nuh uh three steps does not a stairs make

user29: yall done?

yourusername: you don't even like fish?

landonorris: but i love YOU !!!

yourusername: i love you toooooo

yourusername: but you're gonna have to get over it because next aussie christmas i will be having my seafood

landonorris: i guess so

landonorris: but just for you!

yourusername: awwww this is real love :3

user30: i think we've just seen y/n tie lando down for life

yourusername: oh believe me i've tied him down before

landonorris: hehehehehe

oscarpiastri: idk i defo saw a shrimp ...

oscarpiastri: in a ribbon...

landonorris: well i was hardly ever gonna be excited to see YOU

yourusername: it's okay babe he's just trying to rattle you

oscarpiastri: i'm just stating what i saw

yourusername: that's it !!! the next time your next to stairs it's ME you should be worried about

oscarpiastri: well this is not very christmas spirit of you

landonorris: we got all our christmas spirit out even when you tried to cockblock

oscarpiastri: i'm going to block both of you

user31: three unwise men i love you all

user32: mclaren please never take them away from me

user33: @ mclaren please bring back unboxed with y/n as host please

yourusername: i only star in not safe for work videos with lando sorry

landonorris: :3333333

oscarpiastri: i'm going to kill myself

fin.

note: nearly done with this series woooooo!!!!

[zucchinitart]

skinty LJ 💕

finally gonna make a ref sheet for this man!! repurposing an old sketch cuz I still generally agree with the design…I actually intended to render that old sketch but never did 😭

now here’s some never-before-revealed lore and headcanons!! (this all takes place in a story I’ve never created except in my head 💀 also some have been told, I’m just reiterating them):

-This is how LJ generally looks between the years 1817 to 1886. He was “born” in 1803, stayed with Isaac for one year, got stuck in the box for 13 years, and only started wearing bandages in 1817 once he became a target to the public. As he started getting more wounds, he found out that they would open up easily and opted to wear bandages most of the time.

-He can’t eat as he lacks a digestive system. Instead, he feeds on human interaction. The more positive the interaction, the better it is for him. Because he had such a poor relationship with humans during these years, he ends up looking starved. He’s quite weak in this state, and the only thing keeping him alive is his wit and his sharp nails for weapons.

-His limbs are black right above the connection of his joints (knees and elbows). The rest of his skin is white.

-His hair would be naturally curly, but due to improper care and the long length dragging it down, it ends up looking wavy and sometimes even straight, albeit very frizzy and/or greasy.

-In 1886, that’s when LJ and Lillian first meet (omg OC and canon??? gross 😰🤢). They create a pact, and he starts getting more positive interaction with humans. As he gets more “sustenance,” his wounds start to heal properly and he gets stronger. Unfortunately, most of his wounds have scarred over at this point and they remain on his body as it’s now recognized as “healthy” tissue. (Placement of scars will be in another post)

-Lillian is 23 when she first meets LJ.

-Before his strength improved, Lillian could actually beat LJ in an arm wrestling contest!! But after about a few months of being together, that was no longer the case. (Lillian’s ego was a little hurt, but it was inevitable 😞)

-Although it looks like it, he never actually felt starved. He doesn’t experience typical feelings like hunger or fulfillment.

-Sadly, he’ll never retain his curl pattern. Lillian tries very hard to get it back as she has her own experience with her hair, but she can never get more than a few curls on his head. She gives up at some point and just accepts his wavy/straight hair as is. LJ truly doesn’t care either way. If he had his way, he’d probably forget and never wash it again.

-the dickless look is on purpose!!! No reproductive system means no dick!! Yippee, no nsfw 🤗 Unless I feel freaky, which will most definitely happen…so if you ever see him with a dick, it’s just for my own nefarious purposes 😞

-When Lillian first found out how old LJ was, she said “wow, you could be my grandpa….” LJ didn’t take too kindly to that and scolded her like a grandpa.

-His body stopped aging once Isaac died. In this version, Isaac dies at the age of 21. LJ is physically around 5 years older than Isaac, so his physical age is stuck at around 26 (but it’s not rlly trustworthy as his body isn’t comparable to a typical human’s…I’d say it’s probably between 25-35 though)

I want to get into so much lore, but I wanna save it for when I draw a comic or something. Ty for reading if you read this far!! 💕

[jeahreading]

Year-End Moots Post

@glorfie394 - Honestly, i don't think i need to say much other than the fact that you were probably one of the very few people I consider my best friends irl. We've been talking less and less and I really hope we can talk more this year.

@1indigoisles You used to say that I shouldn't consider you a good friend because we haven't even known each other for a year. Well now it's been more than that, so we should also be really good friends, while we didn't talk for most of this year that's only because of academics and I can't promise it won't happen again but I really REALLY want to talk more with you, even if I take time responding once in a while.

@pb-dot - quoted from you, last year "You and I seem to mostly pass as ships in the night, but sometimes the distant sound of a foghorn can be just the thing, to torture the metaphor a little" Honestly you were the first blog I sent an ask to and your clockwork boy amazed me to bits, we're still ships but maybe not so much in the night anymore, dusk?

@mycatisatool - I still remember how we talked last year just a few days before New Year's and how I ranted to you, a random person. Talking to you has never and will never feel foreign, I hope we remain friends or even acquaintances for many more years to come!

@joytri I'm not sure what I should say except the fact that YOU'RE SO AESTHETIC, omg I wish i was even close to how pretty your blog and posts are dffsnbsjdhjf I so wish i could by your stationary T_T.

@chichihuahua1413 - MY SISTER FROM ANOTHER MISTER, nobody can convince me that we AREN'T twins separated at birth. UGH, I wish I had come to that gathering it's been SO LONG SINCE WE'VE MET. Wow, can you believe we've known each other for 9 years now?? seems absolutely surreal.

@clarablightt - we met unexpectedly and I am SO glad we did, we didn't talk much at first but now when we do I am happy the whole day. Sometimes we talk for hours and it feels like minutes, I wish you all the happiness in this world and someday we're gonna meet istg

@owlsandwich - O yem GEE, even though many years separate us talking to you has never felt that way, you talk with a young soul if that makes any sense, and of course, you being absolutely adorable doesn't help. Heard somewhere that pets represent their owner and seeing Miss Zero, you both seem carefree and loving. I hope you have the best year ever!!!!

@fangirlghost-19 - Found your blog in the most detective way possible hihi, but so glad I did, you're absolutely amazing and you just have that pizzazz not everyone has!

@shua-f4lmings Started talking to you because I really wanted to talk to someone who likes skz, no regrets, I am in LOVE with your aesthetic, that blog change was ICONIQUE.

@baxieblur-turnip Heyyyyyyyy we met on chance and babe that hexagone is hexagoning so hard, we need to talk more frrr

@ek-ajnabee-haseena hamari jugalbandi honi zaruurat hain!! we should sing because i just know it's gonna be so freaking good!

@hxart-of-thx-ocxan - bestie so aesthetic i quacking in my boots, looking at your blogs makes me want to float away on a boat into the ocean and never look back again 🤤🤤

@book-girl4evaaa - I'm pretty sure we first talked because I thought you were desi but you are AMAZING all the same, seeing you talk about the heather is adorable asf and you're fashion sense makes me jealous 😭😭

@dinnerbug - saw you on my side and you actually genuinely intrigued me so much I followed you and honestly you are one of my most curious mutuals. I'm pretty sure I once sent an ask to you telling you to drink less coca cola lmaoo

@zeherili-ankhein - CHINIIII!!!!!! top 3 best persons i've met on this app fr, the mark of true and honest friendship is that we KNOW we disagree on many things but that does NOT stop us from being such close friends, i don't think you realise how badly i want to be irl friends with you istg 😭😭

@no--net - If someone asked me one thing I wanted for you, I'd wish you could understand bangla, i just know I would recommend SO MANY feluda and byomkesh bakshi. 😫😫

@paloma-ascends-into-hellfire - I don't quite remember why we started following each other but I glad we did all the same, my first thought seeing you was literally that one song by Paris Paloma, solely because of the name, which btw hold you high HIGH in my mind!! Wish you the absolute BEST year ahead!

@anonymouse-is-here We haven't talked much but YOU'RE SO ADORABLE!!!! And also your blog is just 🤌🤌

@im-on-crack-send-help CHOTIIII!!!! you're like the sister i never had and i will kill to have 😀🔪. You should really be on less crack and more happiness cuz you deserve it :D. Also beware at night because I will come to you house to steal your eyes and hair and wardrobe, beware.......... ily uwu<3

@telugu-girl-13 - Honestly you're going to be the 2nd reason why I read pjo. You're blog gives me old b&w vibes and it's just top tier imo <3 adorable kwnekjfrnkjnr

@inhachoi0901 - we need to meet more often cuz YASS talking to you is so freaking fun, we also need to like sing together!<33(you also need to tell what shampoo you use)

@mi-stress-of-chaos - you're blog 🙇🙇🙇🙇🙇🙇🙇🙇🙇 teach me how to be aeshtetic like you sensei. Also, I'm grabbing a bucket and taking the stress far FAR away from you. you need a vacation i swear<33

@shadowseductress - omg you're like really beautiful, like beautiful like I'm gonna start singing apsara aali and then promptly trip and fall on my face, you're so badass ngl i kinda idolize you 😀😀😭.

@shinchansbitch - you need a shiro in your life, one that talks fr. You're weird but like the really fucking awesome kinda weird. I need tips from you, we need to sit down and you need to tell me your autobiography babe.

@no-idea-where-i-am-lost - Oh my god you're like dangerously adorable, like i need to put orange traffic cones around you, when you and @wulfricnavy get married invite me to the wedding, ashirvaad aur atta dono deke jaoongi.(cutie pie cutie cutie pieeeeeeeeeeeeee)

@natures-marvel - Solving that scavenger hunt with you was so freaking fun!!!!! you're amazing to to talk to and I think we have an mutual want for episode three 😭😭😭

@ineffable-bastard - You're so cool omg, LOVE that fact that your hair always a different colour and please NEVER stop tagging me you're like my no.1 source of tag games and tag games are a straight path to love <33

@hellincarnation - honestly in terms of you, i just don't know what to say, you are kind, you are sweet, you care, you are cute and adorable and with just the correct amount of spice, you're like god's perfect recipe, we met late in the year but it's like we've knows each other for years, getting to know you made ,my year infinitely better and holy shit i just want to minimize you put you in a jar and carry you around with me everywhere, you're an A+ dipshit but also a brother, please take care of yourself and keep showing up so that we can fight more.<333

@mireyaaaaaaaaa - you're not just a ray of sunshine you're the whole freaking sun, you're like and endless energy reserve(stop hogging all the energy give us peasants some!!), you love book and I love book, and now I love you<333. Let's interact more this next year, and all the very best for your 10th you will do well I just know it!!

@fujimomozane - I'm pretty sure we haven't talked yet but, you're always there, for that I thank you(psst you afk art gives me life<33)

@your-reluctant-optimist - you, I'm gonna put you in a little terrarium and I'm going to keep your pocket sized everything in my pocket<3333333333333333

@randomx123 - Dada !! Your art is just *chef's kiss 🤌🤌🤌* and the durga pujo at your house is "bhalobasha", this year we didn't talk very much but whenever you're on my dash I always get happy :D. Don't worry shob kichu bhalo jabe, relax and keep doing what you think is best 😁😁.

@hj-lives-on - yo! i don't think we've talked about anything relevant lmao, but i will say good music taste and let's like, talk about things that are...normal :D

@lyrebirb - You are ADORABLE period. i need to know more about you i swear you are utterly fascinating, we should 100% talk more please!!!<3

@androgynous-bhajipav - i can't believe we became such good friends in this short time!?? Payneland brought together and our dymanic kept us together<33

@mersinia - Us meeting was the best coincidence of this year lmao, the amount of tumblr things we have in common is baffling, we REALLY need to talk more.

@shubhadeep385 - Gave me gangster vibes from the beginning and turns out i was right 😂. But you're also an older brother, like fr. In the proper sense lmao, you told me to never trust boys and also told me the boy I have a crush on is *chomu*, if this isn't proper bhai behaviour i dunno what is. Take care of yourself next bochor, I'm always there 😁😁.

@sittininthepoopchair - I also saw you on my side blog and your adorable ass dad vibes were just too adorable for me to ignore. I might not be your target or comfortable audience but you're absolutely amazing and Seeing you talk about your kids always has been smiling <3.

I'm soo sorry if I missed anyone, but if you are someone I missed just know I love you I love your blog you are adorable as fuck and HAVE THE BEST NEW YEAR EVER!!!!!<3333333

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!!

[chit2luvu]

Lovers' Entanglement

Pairings: Dom!Rayne Ames X Reader

A/N: This is my first smut fic, im not sure what Im doing but my brain produced and here I present. I also published this in ao3 but i didnt rlly get any interactions hence why im here pls dont flop :< Tags: mentions of cunnilingus, nipple play, p in v, afab reader, hickeys

It’s an ordinary day for Rayne and Y/N.

Well, not so much since Y/N has been practically bawling her eyes out because he was going to graduate.

In the morning, during the ceremony, and after the ceremony.

She clung onto him at every chance. More so than ever. Her tears staining on the taller boy’s graduation gown. It was quite a sight to see.

“Y/N…” He mumbled, patting her back as she hugged him tight. Rayne did indeed love her, he was sad to part with her but it’s not like their love would disappear with the lower frequency of their visits.

The most embarrassing part was when Principal Wahlberg came over to tease the two.

“My, my if it isn’t the power couple of our school. Congratulations on becoming a full fledged Divine Visionary at the Magic Bureau, Rayne. As for your devastated girlfriend…” He trailed off, cheekily looking at the two.

“I-I’m sorry I can’t greet you properly, it’s just that I’m not ready to not see him everyday anymore Principal Wahlberg…” the younger girl said through tears.

“It’s quite alright… Hahaha, the sweetness of first love in the air... Oh to feel it again at my age. Take care of each other, you two. And congratulations on graduating Max Land, I hope to see your achievements in the future here on out.”

Rayne nodded in approvement.

“Thank you, Principal Wahlberg, I am honored.” Max politely replied, with a small bow.

“This is it. I probably won’t see them again until summer break or whatever.” Y/N sadly thought, her tears still uncontrollably flowing down.

As the principal left, the first years joined the trio to congratulate them. Finn was the first one to suggest a commemorative group photo.

Rayne pulled away from her and pinched her cheeks to try and get some sense into her .“Y/n, we’re going to take pictures now so stop crying okay? For me?” He pleaded, wiping her tears away with his sleeve.

“Eep… Not fair… you… you’re gonna make me cry more,” she sobbed trying her best to keep her emotions in check as she looked up at Rayne pitifully.

Suddenly, he kissed her wet lips to hopefully stop her from crying. And it worked like a charm. Even after the kiss, y/n continued to stare at Rayne with flushed cheeks and swollen lips, the aftertaste of their sweet kiss lingering on her lips. The group went silent after witnessing their blatant display of affection.

“Nooooo! Why?! Why do all the good looking guys snag all the girls?!?!” Dot cried out as usual with murderous intent.

“Please refrain from making love in the eyes of an innocent child,” Lance commented as he clutched his necklace.

“Omg!! Y/n!! Ahhhh~~ Mash, did you see that? That could be us!!” Lemon fangirled while aggressively hitting Mash’s back to make her point.

“Uhm…” the muscle head said with disbelief.

“N-Nii–chan?!” Finn screeched as he hid his eyes behind his hands. He had most definitely never seen such a side of his older brother.

“Rayne you daring man!!” Max exclaimed, going in between the couple and hitting their backs to dissipate the tension, finally putting some distance between the two. “Well, what are you waiting for? Let’s take a picture!”

The students huddled together, performing various poses as they took many pictures.

One heart in the middle formed by Rayne and Y/N while Lemon, Mash and Lance formed one on the left and Dot, Finn and Max formed another on the right.

Then, freestyle poses.

They all put up a thumbs up for one.

And a peace sign for another.

And a heart sign for the last.

“Wow! These came out good!” the brunette said, scanning the photos happily. “Can’t forget to take a trio one too!”

So Rayne, Max and Y/N took another photo.

Then another photo with just Rayne and Max.

“And now, to commemorate the cringiest but slayest power couple of our school, Rayne and Y/N!” Lemon cheered happily for the two, holding out her wand. “3…2…1… Smile!”

Another utter shock.

The photo captured Rayne kissing Y/N on the cheek

“Oi! She said smile, not kiss!” Dot complained, about to jump out into action to stop them from further PDA but Lance kept him in check with his graviole.

“Well, you probably don’t know the feeling of having the love of your life desperately cling onto you just because you guys won’t be seeing each other everyday since you don’t have a girlfriend huh?” Rayne retorted the first year with a fierce look, as he held a blushing Y/N by her waist.

There were just one too many surprises from him. The first years were in absolute disbelief at their senior’s soft attitude towards his girlfriend. The ones who found it hardest to take this in were Finn and Dot.

After the ceremony, the group disbanded, each going back their own way. By tomorrow, most of the graduates would be gone, including Rayne which the Y/N couldn’t handle.

She returned to Rayne’s dorm, helping him pack up. The once minimalist room becomes an empty Adler room. Even his rabbit bedsheet was cleared with the rest of his rabbit related merch.

“Rayne…” Y/N started, her thoughts unclear of this whole situation. Only her fervent emotions screamed, telling her not to let go of her boyfriend at all costs.

“Yes?” He calmly replied, sitting down beside her on the bed.

“I will really really really miss you a lot.”

“I know dear,” he said, sliding his hand on top of hers as he sincerely looked at her with soft eyes.

“Ray-ayneeee” she said, plunging her body on top of Rayne’s onto the bed. “I might start crying again… sorry,” she mumbled as she lifted her head up from his chest.

“Bad girl,” he whispered into her ear while he brushed back the strand of hair. Those two words make her whole body feel all tingly in a weird way. “I don’t want our last memory in a long while to be you waving at me with tears during our send off, like as if you’re sending your husband off to war.” he honestly said, still keeping his hand on her head.

Y/N’s cheeks flushed red from his comment. Rayne had always been the type of boyfriend that cared for his girlfriend by actions, not words. When she had her period, he would always bring chocolates and a heat pack to her dorm and throughout the day, he would check on her wellbeing multiple times. Even on normal days, when they talked during recess and lunch or after school hours, he was thoughtful to bring her something that reminded him of her from time to time. He did what he felt was suitable and even let out his true self. True self as in saying whatever he wanted. Even if it meant the lines he was saying sounded like some confession from a third rate romance novel.

“I guess I won’t cry anymore…” she pouted, her gaze averting away from his as she went back to nuzzling his chest.

There it was again.

That warm fluttery feeling that arises in their hearts at times like these.

But other than wanting to hold each other tight and never letting go, Rayne found himself having a new profound desire. If he were to possibly switch their positions, holding Y/N down on his bed while he whispered sweet nothings into her ears, would she like it? If he were to maybe pull down her collar and mark her neck for everyone to see would it be unfair of him? If only he could say for sure to continue to act on his instincts. After all, it was hard to stay calm with his lover’s breasts pressed up against his chest, her whole body looking as if she was being served on a golden platter ready to be ravished him. He really wanted to devour her right there and then.

“Rayne?” Y/N shyly questioned. She had long noticed his body’s reaction, unsure of what would be the best next course of action for the two.

...

“Sorry, I’ll- I’ll go to the bathroom for a bit.” Rayne enunciated, gently pushing Y/N off to the side and getting up so as not to worsen the awkwardness of the conversation.

But when her soft hand stopped him in his tracks, something inside of him just snapped.

“Y/N, there’s no saying what could happen if you don’t let go of your hand right now.” Rayne spoke as he turned around, his manner of speech getting a little shaky.

“I-I-I know! Well ummm I just thought that since we won’t be seeing each other in a long while… I… I want to help you since you're always by my side…”

He turned, his amber eyes meeting her e/c ones. He hugged her, bringing her face to his chest as he wrapped his arms around her neck.

“Y/N, you know how much I love you right? I promise nothing will change between us. You don’t owe me anything, love. I can wait until you’re ready.”

His words were always so reassuring, always laced with layers of honey, always warm and gentle. But she’s not doing it just to make Rayne happy, if it was with him, Y/N would gladly give her everything, in this case was her body.

“Rayne… I love you too, which is why I want to do it with you, if it’s with you I-”

Before Y/N could even finish her sentence, Rayne was already pinning her down on his bed. He impatiently pushed his lips against hers, their tongues entwining, leaving each other breathless as he pulled away.

“Sorry, I guess I got carried away there.”

He panted, their breaths shaky from the intense kiss. Still, his lips came close to her ear, letting out a husky voice.

“Hey, if you feel uncomfortable at any time, just say my full name. Otherwise, you best believe I’m not stopping until I leave tomorrow. I’m going to make it known to the whole world that you are my woman, no one can take you away from me. You’re mine, only mine. Got that? ”

Her whole face immediately turned into a tomato without any spell. He really was serious about her. He sat up on the bed, unbuttoning his shirt and loosening up his tie to reveal his toned body. Sure, Rayne was a magic user but he still kept fit to increase his stamina, which explained his six pack.

“You like it that much? C’mon, feel it– the only one stopping you is yourself.”

He smirked, enjoying that flustered look on his partner who was inevitably his to be taken. He leaned into Y/N, looking up to meet her longing eyes, that anticipation and excitement. It made Rayne so unbelievably happy that she wanted him as much as he wanted her. He unbuttoned Y/N’s blouse, pulling her bra up in one swift motion as his large hands got to work; cupping her delicate mounds, licking and sucking on her perky nipples, even twisting and pulling, doing whatever he pleased as an Y/N suffered under his control, her moans spilling throughout the empty room.

“Rayne, that's… that’s embarrassing, why are you o-only focusing there…?”

“Hmm I can’t? It’s just that they look so beautiful, baby”

“Nghh that’s not fair”

“Sounds like you’re asking me to pay attention to some other parts too, huh?”

His hand slowly glided down her bare stomach, making his touch even more tingly on her body. Rayne undid her skirt and tossed it aside. Without sparing any time, he touched her wet clit that was practically soaking through her underwear.

“Amazing, you’re already this soaking wet for me when all I did was play with your nipples” He commented, pulling her panties aside and sliding his hand up and down on her swollen pussy.

Unbeknownst to Y/N, he pressed his lips up against her opening, licking her juices, even sucking her clit from time to time before inserting his tongue inside.

“Rayne why–! That place… It’s dirty…” Y/N could only say, before her voice was quickly transformed into pleasure again, the heat of both teens rising. “Hnngh.. Rayne I-I feel weird! A-ah! I think… I think I’m coming…! Mhmmm!” She said, pressing her mouth against her hand to hide her humiliating noises.

The older male pulled back, licking the liquid on his lips clean when he suddenly inserted his two fingers, pressing up against here and there until-

“A-aah!”

Y/n moaned loudly, unable to hide the fact that he had found her soft spot.

“So that’s where you’re weak? Duly noted.” He said, pressing his fingers up against it even more, receiving another moan from y/n. “I want to put it in so bad… y/n please I-” He huffed, his hot breath landing right on the crook of her neck.

“W-wait what about protection?!”

…

None of them had anticipated this moment so they had nothing on them.

“I think Max has some... ” he paused, "I'll be back in a jiffy, love" he muttered, leaving behind a small kiss on her cheek. Before he left, covered Y/N with a blanket and took his robe and left.

Y/n stayed huddled up in the blanket, trying to process what was actually happening. Was it too fast? I mean, they've been dating for like a year and a half so it should be fine right? Plus, it's Rayne. Yes, Rayne Ames. Sudden images of Rayne smiling ever so slightly whenever he met her appeared. That's right, he's the man she fell in love with. They both wanted this, it felt just right with him.

A few minutes later, Rayne had returned with the item in hand. He took off his robe once more and looked at her hungrily. "Are you ready darling?" he smirked, lifting the covers, trailing his rough hands along her leg up to her thighs as he got on top.

It’s not fair how he looks at Y/N with those eyes. How could she possibly push him away in this heat of the moment? She bit her lips in both fear and excitement, her eyes carefully following his every move.

He unbuckled his belt, pulling down his zip to reveal a huge bulge under his boxers. Scary. What was even scarier was when he took off all his undergarments, revealing a monster- no, a huge veiny cock. Y/N immediately yelped in shock, in awe of seeing something so… sinful. Yet, the excitement and pleasure that came along with it was as anticipated.

“Will it even fit…” she nervously questioned, finding it hard to believe that it’s her beloved boyfriend’s dick.

“We’ll make it work. I swear to be gentle, my love. I want us to enjoy this together.”

As soon as he slid on the condom, without any sense of hesitation, all Y/N felt was the warmth lining up her entrance before going all the way inside. That sense of fulfilment shared between the two was unfathomable. Like finally being one complete being, Rayne’s hot member filled her up.

“Your insides are wrapping around me so tightly bunny, how am I supposed to move like this huh? You tell me”

Unable to handle the dirty talk and sudden pet name, she averted her gaze from his in embarrassment. But that wasn’t going to stop him from teasing her further. He cupped her cheeks and made her face his way.

“Tell me how much you want it bunny, because no way we’re going to stop now. Not when I’ve got you right under my thumb.”

“P-please, Rayne, I need you, I need you t-thrusting inside of me… You… Only you can make me feel so incredibly happy and-”

“Well said dear, obedient bunnies get their reward don’t they? Now take it like a good girl for me, Y/N.”

Oh boy, she was in for a ride. The moment Rayne held her hands tenderly while leaning in, she should’ve braced herself. The moment he started moving– those shallow thrusts quickly turned into deep ones.

“Rayne…! Rayne…! Rayne…!”

“Say how good I feel inside you. How am I supposed to know if my baby girl likes it otherwise?”

“Yes…! Mmm! I love it! I love you! R-Rayne… ahhh… kiss please…”

“So needy for daddy hmm~ Don’t worry I’ll spoil you lots”

Those intense thrusts followed by breathless kisses.

Y/N was definitely not going to last until tomorrow.

Night has definitely fallen, but what time was it exactly? Who knows? All the two love birds know is that they’ve fulfilled their wildest desires; and that they’re right where they want to be in life. That feeling of content, reinforced by the way Rayne continues to wrap his arm around Y/N’s bare waist under the bed sheets.

“Was I… too rough?” the concerned male inquired.

“Kind of, my back is sore! Hmph!” she pouted, turning her head away for dramatic effect.

Rayne rubbed her cheeks playfully, trying to console the girl as he entertained her childish behaviour.

“C’mon bunny, don’t be like that~”

…

“Well, do you want to get washed up together? I think we’re both feeling pretty sticky after that endeavour, hmm?”

“Yeah, that does sound like a plan”

Without any warning, Rayne got up and picked Y/N up in one fell swoop, putting her over his shoulder.

“W-wait whaaa?! Put me down!” she demanded, hitting his back with her fists while her legs kicked the air.

“I’m taking responsibility for my actions so stay still my love”

He had forcefully picked her up to the bathroom and turned on the shower.

“We already went all the way, there’s no need to be shy showering-”

“It’s not that, it’s just that I still can’t wrap my head around what had just happened.”

“Well, we made love. It’s as simple as that, my beloved y/n,” he said in a matter of fact tone, leaning down to kiss her forehead gently.

Although they were done for the most part, Rayne couldn’t help but stare in awe at his lover. He had the love of his life, y/n, wrapped around his finger. She was right in front of him, ever so vulnerable as the marks he had left on her were clear as day. Her red, puffy nipples were so adorable, he just wanted to do it all over again.

Like as if Y/N read his mind, she panickedly declared, “You can’t anymore, I forbid!”

“Hmph fine fine” he gave in, not wanting to push her too hard.

The warmth of the water seemed to reflect the content of the two. It was as if they were already living together, in their own little humble abode, where the two did as they wished. Y/N drew soap bubble art on his chest, silly, cute doodles. Rayne, as promised, helped clean her up and they both had a nice, long, much needed shower.

“All done,” Rayne said, as he finally finished drying her hair with the towel.

“Thanks, babe,” she smiled cheerily, feeling very satisfied with the extra amount of attention she was getting.

“I’m merely giving you all the love you deserve, bunny” he simply said, taking the ends of her soft hair, kissing it tenderly, receiving another blush from Y/N.

“It’s illegal to be this smooth,” she mumbled, turning her head away from Rayne.

Her comment resulted in Rayne's soft laughter. That's right, this was the special dynamic they had. They were right where they wanted to be.

[kindestofkings]

dear john

elijah hewson x singer!reader

(ex!charles leclerc cause hes a hot red flag)

plot: its giving friends to strangers to friends again to lovers 🫶🏼

face claim: laufey <3

warning: spelling mistakes

authors note: this is for the lovely anon who requested a speak now inspired smau ! Hope this is okay?!? I was tempted by doing something on the vibe of speak now the song but imma think on it 🫡

yourusername

liked by charlesleclerc and others

yourusername wow last night on tour was something special 😢 to everyone who sangs my songs back to me and everyone who's supported my little dreams, I LOVE YOU.

view all other comments

lucydacus killing it !

yourusername luv you <333

phoebebridgers voice of an ANGEL

yourusername ooh stop im blushinggg

charlesleclerc beautiful as always mon ange

ynfan1 post concert blues are toooo real

wagsandstuff

liked by ynfan1 and others

wagsandstuff huh that doesn't look like yourusername to us.... did the couple of 3 years break up without telling us??

view all comments

ynfan1 nooooooo that girl on twitter was right ah

ynandcharlesshipper charlessss man don't do this

charlesfan she was always feeding off of him

ynfan2 she has her own career you do know that right? she a really popular singer

ynfan2 not charles cheating on our QUEEN

yourusername just unfollowed charlesleclerc

yourusername just added to their story!

lol gonna go heal my heart I guess lol

replies:

yourmum awh my beautiful girl :( glad you're coming home 💘

↳ can't wait to see you mam

yourbestfriend men are literal pigs.

phoebebridgers he's an idiot, here for you if you need anything

elijahhewson hey I know it's been awhile since we last spoke, but the lads and I are always here for you. I should've been better at keeping in touch, but I'm so sorry this happened to you.

↳ hey E, missed you! I'm just as much at fault, guess we all just got so busy with tours (both so successful heheh). where abouts in the world are you? I'm heading home for awhie maybe we could all catch up?

↳ elijahhewson deadly! myself, ryan and josh are home and bobby is back next week, call around whenever

inhalerfanaccount

liked by inhalerfan1 and others

inhalerfanaccount did you guys know that yourusername is friends with inhaler??? I found all of these oldies while lurking her insta !

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inhalerfan1 bless they're so young, they all must of been friends during school !

inhalerfan2 crazy to think they've all become so successful

ynfan1 wow my two worlds colliding

ynfan2 I've always secretly hoped yn and eli would get together

inhalerfanaccount friends to strangers to friends to lovers hits soooo hard

yourusername

liked by bobbyskeetz and others

yourusername time is a terrifying thing..

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yourmam I could probably find an even earlier pic...

bobbyskeetz I beg please no inhalerfan1 pleaseeeeee

elijahhewson smash x4

joshjenkinson_ the gang getting back together has 2024 winninggg

(liked by yourusername,ryanmcmahon_15 and others)

ynfan1 yesss bitch remind that silly boy who drives in circles of all the hot friends you have !!!

(liked by elijahhewson and others) ynfan2 hahahah eli woke up and choose chaos

yourusername

liked by phoebebridgers and others

yourusername turning all this heartbreak into something good ! dear john is the rawest I've ever been in my songwriting, treat her with love x

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ynfan1 so so incredibly beautiful, thank you for sharing

lucydarcus you're a wonder

ryanmcmahon_15 sobbing uncontrollably and ready to fight him

bobbyskeetz you good bro ?

charlesfan1 tough day to be a charles fan

ynfan2 omg those lyrics are HEARTBREAKING

inhalerfanupdates

liked by eliswife and others

inhalerfanupdates WHO HAS THIS MAN SO SMILEY???

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inhalerfan1 FOR REAL?? hes usually so moody

elijahhewson posted to their close friends!

replies yourusername pure stalker when did you take this pic??

vogue

liked by yourusername and others

vogue with just days before the release of her highly anticipated spohmore album we chatted to yourusername about love, loss and all things in between;

" you dont realise how easy love can be until you're with the right person. its the most annoying thing to hear when you dont have it but some how I was fortunite enough to discover"

find out what else the singer told us at the link in our bio !

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yourusername THANK YOU FOR HAVING ME

ynfan1 shes so happy and in love

ynfan2 how can one person be so talented, smart AND intelligent

charlesfan1 eww cant believe charles used to date her!

ynfan3 love how shes not petty like the leclerc fangirlies clearly still are..

yourusername

liked by elijahhewson and others

yourusername a year and a half ago I had my heartbroken, felt completed untethered and so so confused. today I give you my pride and joy!

this album features songs I wrote as a sobbing mess, some I wrote while I was healing and finally some I wrote after I opened my eyes and embraced what I had all along.

I love them all, I love everyone who worked on it with me and I escially love you.

comments have been restricted

yourusername

liked by lucydarcus and others

yourusername one single thread of gold tied me to you <3

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elijahhewson hell was the journey

yourusername but it brought me heaven. bobbyskeetz gross yourusername child

joshjenkinson_ my parents

yourmam my favourite pair !

evehewson sobbing it was always meant to be

phoebebridgers the sweetest love for the sweetest soul

(liked by elijahhewson and yourusername)

ynfan1 OMGOMGOMGOMGOMG

finished

authors note: ahh im a broken record with the friends from home trope but its my favourite 🥲 hope you all enjoy, please as always let me know what you think!!

[actuallyvalerie]

I hope this isn’t super unsolicited but I’ve been following you for a LOONG time and I always thought u were just anither artist that has been non-stop dedicated to their craft since they were a kid but reading ur pinned shocked me to my core 😭😭 You’re so good what!! Do you have any tips for a beginner artist that starts later in life (i’m 22) like what kind of tutorials to watch or how to study? you’re my #1 inspo when it comes to artstyle

OMG this is soooo touching really! The best feeling is to inspire others and honestly, you are making me tearing up😭😭 Yea, I'm on the beginning of my journey only, and I'm trying to observe everything I see to grow as fast as possible, since I lost pretty damn much years aswell. But to cheer you up a little, I believe that the older you get, the easier it is to learn, since you understand many things better. So what would I suggest so far and what I'm doing myself: 1. Rule numba one - observing. Literally. Become a sponge and soak up information as if your life depended on it. The thing is that in drawing, as in almost all crafts, OBSERVATION is very important. Your brain needs to get information from somewhere on how and what to do, it cannot generate from 0. And this means that your task is to fill it with information. What I advise is to collect drawings of everyone you like, no matter how cool they are. Watch speedpaintings, surround yourself with creativity, so that you slowly remember all sorts of little things. Speedpaintings are a treasure trove, you will unconsciously remember other people's ready-made solutions and make them in the future. 2. The second piece of advice is to try to repeat other people's work for learning purposes. This technique is also used in graphic design. You see the finished result - try to come to it. It doesn't matter that it won't turn out the same, but try to look at every detail and figure out how to achieve it, this will help in your own future works. 3. The third piece of advice is anatomy and fundementals. Yea-yea, it's boring, I always want to get to the fun part faster too. But literally in my last work I laughed at myself, like: "Wow, I literally draw simple shapes in the body and just smooth out the corners to make it more natural. You need to learn shapes." 4. It will probably take me a million points, so I will make this the last one as the main advice - references. Remember, your head cannot generate solutions from nowhere, so use references!! The more you draw, the more will be stored in your head and in the future you will be able to come up with everything yourself, but now, it is important to repeat what already exists. Photos are a must have! Other people's drawings - only in general, details and not a complete work. For example, I have not yet figured out how I want to draw noses - I go to see how my favorite artists do it and learn from them. And here I do not know how to paint clothes, I go and collect a collage of clothes that others do and try to understand how they came to this. 5. Last advice will be practical. Anatomy book that saving my ass - https://anatomy4sculptors.com/ Youtubers - NIRO, Pikat, Proko, Angel Ganev. Main advice - References are the most important part. Preparing for an art is important. Practicing all the time - is important. And HAVE FUN! Drawing should be FUN, it's not routine, there are lots of ways to make the process fun. :) Hope it helps! Sorry for the mistakes, English isn't my first language!

[shiny-jr]

i come from quotev and omg how is your writing so goooood i've been thinking about Damnation (The Vizier's Vassal/ The Raven Retainer/ The Diviner) for 4~5 months now

and i go back to reread them so often, they're so tasty!!!

omgggg and the fact that yn have a personality and not just some quiet shy meek caricature, they're scheming and manipulating and semi sadistic.... i love it!!!

i would say i wish you could write more in the Au but you probably done with that project, so anyway love your writing!

actually ALLLL writers should stop writing and only you're allowed to.

Wow...?? That's actually a really long time? I would say that may be mildly concerning, but I'm way more flattered than anything else. I must be doing something right if the story can stick with someone for that long?

MCs with personality and FLAWS, y'all love to see it. One of my favorite things when making new results, is figuring what kind of MC I want. Will it be something similar to a past MC but with a twist and other defining characteristics? Or something completely different? Y'all never know.

Writing more for the AU is a possibility, but I cannot see myself outright continuing the series once completed. Maybe I would be able to accept and write for the occasional request for the AU, of course depending on the request too, but I wouldn't just forget all about the series. You know I started this AU back in January of 2023? It's been nearly two years. I can't just forget that.

Also if I was the only one to ever write, there would be like zero content and it would be so bland, please. 😭

[adragonsfriend]

Reading Darth Plagueis,

by James Luceno.

Ok I finished this book. It was a wild ride, here are some highlights, (anything in quotes, " ", is in fact, a direct quote). Spoilers, I guess.

———

“At some point, probably when he was focused on murder, a rock or other projectile had pulped a large area of his lower back.”--Plagueis

Yeah man that always happens to me too when I’m focused on murder

———

Me thinking, *Plagueis is way too normal for a sith,* about five seconds before the narration goes *Plagueis was hungry. he thought about eating the eggs of some sentient lizards and also the sentient lizards themselves, but restrained himself*

———

Plagueis, a banker: nOt all mUNns R bAnkErS u kNoW

A pirate who wants a bribe: be better for you if you were some financial wizard

Plagueis, a literal wizard:

———

Captain La (the random pirate): how do u know my name

Plagueis: *truthing* I sliced you ship’s systems,

Plagueis: *lying* it’s not like I’m a telepath or something

———

*at the evil rich people party*

"Republic senators, at least those that weren’t present, would be subjected to ridicule—"

I love how the narration says "subjected" like Bail Organa would give fuck about some assholes making fun of him

———

Plagueis in a business meeting as hego damask:

Repeats himself multiple times conducting experiments in trying to force suggest to a resistant species

His assistant: bro what r u doing ur making us look bad

———

omg young Palpatine is so Anakin coded. Genuinely he throws tantrums it’s perfect

———

Tag this accidental baby acquisition some random dathomiri lady just handed maul over like a sac of potatoes

———

Sidious, about to gaslight, girlboss, gatekeep, mansplain, manipulate, and threaten to manslaughter Nute Gunray within an inch of his life all in the span of a 2 minute zoom call: *wearing his Sith cloak on their holocall* what is up my guy? did u get the rare collectible bird I sent u anonymously a while back?

Nute Gunray: uhh…yes…um… its very nice…who are you and why r u hiding in that hood bro?

Sidious: it's the traditional clothing of my Order

Gunray: ur a cleric?

Sidious: "Do I seem like a holy man to you?"

Me: the only holes I see here are in your logic, morals, ability to feel compassion, and *waves hand all encompassingly* vibes

———

Dooku: if one more Jedi dies because of the indolence of the republic, I’ll leave the Jedi and refuse to look back

Palpatine: *listening attentively*

———

Plagueis & Maul: (separately) gloat about being Sith Lords to people they’re about to kill

Sidious:

Sidious: these idiots cannot keep a secret to save their lives—

———

Plagueis ACTUALLY believes Sidious is about to appoint him co-chancellor. what an idiot.

———

Padme shocking both Sith at every turn during the Naboo crisis is sending me

———

Oooh Sidious' murder rant is incredible. He's like Plagueis you manipulated and abused me, now i'm gonna kill you so I can go do that to other people without you hanging over my shoulder. It's like the evil but still cathartic version of Zuko's speech to Firelord Ozai.

———

Dooku: That zabrak guy was definitely a Sith. There has to be another one, probably the master

Sidious, standing right next to him in a shadowy warehouse wearing a black cloak: “how would one even begin to know where to look for this other Sith?”

———

“For an instant, Palpatine perceived a touch of his younger self in Skywalker”

This book needs to stop. Maybe consider pulling its punches sometime. The only mark of disapproval I have here is that this is portraying Obi-Wan as an asshole for the five seconds he’s present

———

Bad news, the book did indeed stop. I have been gravely injured, but also greatly amused. The experience of reading this book is just constant vacillation between *wow so Sith Lord, so scary, so evil* and *Plagueis, my guy, that is the dumbest ideology I’ve ever heard. maybe if you took a nap (for the first time in 20 years) you’d finally say something that made sense*

I will also confess that I was taking detailed notes about Plagueis for an AU idea I have that I will not be starting for at least another year because I am married to BHOT and I refuse to be like the rest of you sorry fucks with 17 wips (ignoring that fanfic is in fact the only genre of writing I do not have at least 17 wips in)

[thisismeracing]

bonnington-schumi kiddos 

pls include the bono-schumi mood board i sent ya over email in your response

ok i’ve mentioned them enough, lets dig into the bonnington-schumi kiddos

history has a funny way of repeating itself and for bon and mick it manifests in their kids birth order and gender

because much like when corrina had gina and mick, bon had her daughter first and son second. and both came out looking like two more schumacher clones to add to the collection 

but bon isn't complaining because how could she be mad when her two babies share those unmistakable blue eyes 

their first born is named: Eloise “Ellie” Suzanne Bonnington-Schumacher 

and their second born is: Mike “Mikey” Sebastian Bonnington-Schumacher 

imagine bon and mick introducing little ellie to susie in the hospital and when susie asks what her name is and bon goes “eloise suzanne” susie just melts because this little bundle of joy is named after her. 

and the same goes for sebastian when mikey is born 

the f1 crew just going though the cycle of watching another kid grow up in the paddock start up again with miss ellie. but this time it’s the kid of the original kid you watched grow up, and this time around there’s two of them because mikey is born a few years after 

and everyone jokes about how “oh ellie is going to be an engineer like her mama” and “oh mikey is a future f1 champ like his papa” 

but the opposite happens where ellie is the driver, and mikey is an engineer 

And imagine the timelapse of the headphones to protect their little ears and how they look so giant on them cause they’re so small, but give it a few years and now they look proportionate to their bodies 

(i feel like that would make a lot of people just so soft and heartbroken because their favorite little kids are growing up and so fast, like pls make it stop 😢) 

[also the people who watched bon grow up just get deja vu whenever they are interacting with ellie, because wow does she act just like bon when she was this age]

and best believe these two are championship babies. you can't tell me no on this one. 

When they announced they were pregnant with ellie, people both in real life and online are so quick to do the math on when she could’ve been conceived, and they all land on the fact she was conceived around the time of abu dhabi 

and after mikey is born, toto sits the both of them down and says “i love that the team is winning championships with mick, and i love the kids. but next time you two do it after winning a championship please for the love of god put a condom on. because two little kids are going to be enough with them running around the paddock.”

and mick is just mortified, while bon is laughing her ass off and she’s the one to reassure him that they wont be having anymore kids anytime soon

[i told myself i had to finish this before showering and i did! also it breached the second page of the google doc so quickly]

☕

skjgksdjg OMG I LOVED LOVED IT!!! <3<3

totally agree on mikey engineer and ellie driver!!! espec bc I think ellie is more of a social butterfly while mikey is a bit shy like mick, he's funny and friendly, but usually he'll only talk if you talk to him first (the paddock experience helps it a little with this, but he keeps a bit of the shyness, its so cute and bb loves it bc he's such a momma's boy - its makes up for ellie being dada's girl)

adding more: ellie's first word will be angie while mikey's will probably be something from bb's work because she'll work with him on her hips sometimes so his big blue eyes are always watching the engineers go around and listening to everything, she'll only connect the dots bc he says it right after a meeting (to which he was silent throughout it all, only munching on a pencil and grabbing things from the table to curiously analyse)

[hyuck-xix]

i was tagged by @baekslight, thank you and sorry it took me so long to getting around to doing this!

Last Song: Flowers by Aespa.

Favorite Color: turquoise?? also a really nice creamsicle orange...

Last Book: 'Shattered Sky', from the Warrior Cats 'A Vision of Shadows' series. Just finished it last night!

Last Movie: I believe it was 'Death on the Nile', the 70s one with Peter Ustinov. I'm so obsessed with Dame Maggie Smith in this one, she's an icon.

Last TV Show: I only really watch tv with my mom. We recently finished all nine seasons of Endeavour, and now we're looking for a new series. Watched season 1 of Dalgliesh but then the next two seasons were unavailable. Last night we started Parenthood which is definitely *not* a British detective show lmao but we're enjoying it so far! Lots of family drama.

Sweet, Savory, or Spicy: Sweet! I can't do spicy :( i'm uncool like that hahaha

Relationship status: single. old spinster. no prospects on the horizon. i would love a gf but i am shy </3

Last Thing I Searched: uhhhh according to google's search history, it was: "brandon maxwell ss2020 mini dress" haha I really like that specific collection from him. i've been a bit obsessed with fashion rn

Current Obsession: oh wow! literally did not realize this was the next question. fashion!! i've loved fashion since my tween years even though i only seem to wear plain baggy t-shirts. then I'll meet some really stylish cool person and think "i wanna be part of this stylish person thing, i wanna express myself through clothes too". and then i don't do anything about it. right now I want to figure out how to upgrade my style so i can stop being embarrassed about how i dress (although i'm pretty sure it will follow the same pattern of me not doing anything about it haha). I found an old half-empty journal to scribble all my fashion notes down in, and I've been watching Youtube videos from Bliss Foster. My favorite video is where he talked about making "nuanced fashion choices", like that sometimes the best fashion isn't about making the loudest impact, it's about the experience of special details, the interactions in space with your clothes. I really like how unique his perspectives are, all his points just make sense to me. maybeeeee I will actually make a change this time?? hopefully????

Looking Forward To: I've just accepted a job offer and I'm currently in that "onboarding" limbo. I'm looking forward to when I actually start working! It's in a pharmacy which I think will be a good fit for me.

Favorite Drink: Recently my mom got me hooked on Nescafe decaf instant coffee lol. We drink it in the evening, it kind of cleanses the palate from dinner. I never thought I'd be an instant coffee person but here we are!

Song Playing 24/7: I Wanna Be Yours by Arctic Monkeys.

Current Favorite Character: probably Jayfeather from Warrior Cats. It was so cool how his POV was written, since he's blind. His whole understanding of the world is through his other senses. I'm also really enjoying Violetpaw in the Warriors book I just finished. She's an interesting character, always feeling like an outsider with nowhere to belong. It's cool to see her growth, from an insecure kitten to a hero rebelling against the cat dictatorship she was raised under.

Fun Activity I'd Like to Get Into: I just want to get back into the old hobbies I've been putting off. Bead weaving, drawing, doll customization, fmv editing...

Last Video Game: the only game I play is the My Little Pony game on my ipad lmao. It reminds me a bit of Webkinz.

Last Comic: 'Ditching Saskia' by John Moore and Neetols, a graphic novel. It was really cute! I haven't read any webcomics since I switched phones and forgot my Webtoon password haha. But I should get back on that. I used to really love one called My Universe (which is complete now), and Realta. Omg also I'm really excited for whenever zzztlk's Ties that Bind comes out!! I've loveddddd the sneak peeks/mini comics.

no-pressure tagging: @stolennumbers @monwillica @meiozis @loevhyuck @heartcravings and anyone else who wants to participate! 🫶

[mysticstarlightduck]

Incorrect Quotes Tag Game!

Thank you for tagging me @rickie-the-storyteller (here)! I really like tags like this and haven't done one in quite a while! So let's go! (I'll go with the cast of Supernova Initiative for this one)

Rules: use this incorrect quotes generator to come up with incorrect quotes for your OCs!

(It is scary how accurate these got OMG lmao)

Gabi: Hey, aren’t you Jack Tithus? The most famous thief in the galaxy? Jack (narrows his eyes suspiciously): You a cop? Gabi: No. Jack (smirks proudly): Then yes, I am.

Deimos: I’m a multitasker! Also Deimos: I can disappoint fifteen people at once.

Artemis, acting tough: You guys don't want to mess with me. Cassiopeia: Yeah, Artemis will straight-up cry in public. Don't try him. Artemis: Exactly, I will straight-up - (Realizes) Cassiopeia (smug as all heck): Artemis, already tearing up: Cassie, why would you say that?!

Pax: Anybody got any crayons so I can color in my Ph. D.?

Deimos (ten years ago, babysitting Cassie for Jack): OKAY, YOU KNOW WHAT?! TIME OUT! GET ON TOP OF THE FRIDGE! GET UP THERE! (Kid) Cassiopeia: *Climbing* THIS HOUSE IS A FUCKING NIGHTMARE!!!

Meridian: I'm hot, I’m tall, I'm gay, and I'm on my theatre kid arc.

Vesper: Hey, Aleks, where are you going? Aleks: Well, it depends. When I die, probably hell. Aleks: But right now I’m going to get some fries.

Lyorna, looking at Jack: Okay, so I need to become a therapist faster.

Cassiopeia: Hey, are you okay? Jack: Yeah. Cassiopeia: 'Yeah.' You don't look okay... Jack (jokingly, about to change the subject so fast): Well, then stop looking.

Pax: I just got the best idea I've ever had in my entire life! *Later* Ethean, to Pax, disappointed and a bit impressed: That was the worst idea you’ve ever had in your entire life.

Jack: So, company is coming, I want this place looking like Disney On Ice in one minute! (frantically organizing the chaos) Cassie, if you haven't made your bed already, throw it away - it's too late to make it now! Get rid of the couches, guys, we can't let people know we sit!! The chairs need to be pushed in, there can't be any sign of living in this house - (On the verge of a mental breakdown, continues rambling)

The entire crew: (done with life)

Deimos: Vesper, is that... my mug you’re drinking out of? Vesper: No, it’s mine. Deimos: It... looks just like the one I have... Vesper (holding the mug like a gremlin): You don’t have one like this anymore.

The Director: I’ve been described as a ‘heartless villain’ and a 'sadistic bastard’, but I prefer… 'has alternative ways of having fun’.

Deimos, playing a video game: This game is so frustrating! I hate it, I hate it, I hate it! Jack: OK... then I think it’s time to turn off the game for a little while. Deimos (with the manic energy of someone who chugged three bottles of energetics at once, utterly disheveled): BUT I'M HAVING FUN!

Aleks: You... you saved me. You're not a bad guy at all. YOU'RE A HERO, AN UGLY UGLY UGLY HERO! Noctus: Call me ugly again, and maybe I will eat you.

Jack: Just wondering, did you get any sleep? Artemis: Did I get any... leap? Jack (hella confused): A what now...?

Ethean: I'm trying to juggle family life and work life but I can't seem to find a balance. What do you suggest I do to keep everyone happy? Noctus (deadpan): Quit your job, kill your family. Seriously, I can't stand Pax any moment longer-

Vesper: Your problem is that you’ve got no common sense. Aleks: No, I’ve got plenty of common sense! Aleks: I just choose to ignore it.

Deimos: Did you miss me while I was gone? Cassiopeia (being a little shit with a grudge): Oh, you were gone? Wow. Didn't even notice.

Cassiopeia (at 2AM in the morning): I wish I could control wasps and bees to sting my enemies. Jack (who just wants to sleep): You’re too young to have enemies. Cassiopeia: You don’t even know.

Deimos: Hi- Vesper: Leave before there's a terrible misunderstanding between my foot and your ass.

Aleks: Do I sound smart, or am I smart? Noctus: You sound unbearable, to be perfectly honest.

Deimos: Fine! I don't give a shit! Jack: You seem to give a lot of shit for someone who claims not to give a shit.

Noctus: Pick a card, any card. Jack (smirks): Fine. Noctus: Wait, that's my credit card! Jack, already running away, looking over his shoulder: You said any card.

Deimos: And I’d love to be sorry for that, but we all know I’ve done much, much worse.

Pax: O darling brother, you love me, right? Ethean (suspicious): Normally I’d say yes without hesitation, but I feel like this is going somewhere I won’t like.

Noctus (panicked): This should be illegal! Pax (having the time of his life): It is!!!!!!

Cassiopeia: But that’s censorship. Noctus: Well done. You are correct. You’re being censored. Now go away.

Jack, to Cassiopeia: I'm leaving for the weekend, so I hid 100 units in your room for food. Clean your room, and you will find it.

Meridian, putting their hands over Vesper's eyes: Guess who! Vesper: It's either Meridian or the cold, clammy hands of death. Meridian, putting their hands away: It's me! Vesper: Dammit.

Jack: Deimos likes to say ‘you can be part of the problem or part of the solution,’ but I happen to believe you can be both.

Jack: *dangling from a rope over a pit of fire* Remember when I said I’d tell you when we’re in too deep? Cassiopeia: *also dangling from a rope over a pit of fire* Yes? Jack: ...We’re in too deep.

Artemis, sniffling: Calm down, I’m probably not sick. It might just be allergies. Meridian: Okay, tell me this: are you like, really tired? Artemis: I have depression, robot-man, what do you think?

Aleks: I don’t care what anyone thinks about me. Vesper: Ok. Aleks: Wait, why such a muted reaction? Did that not sound cool?

Noctus (lying through his teeth, cause he actually does care): I just wanted to say that over the years, I have come to regard you as… people I met.

Aleks, throwing a pokeball at Deimos: Deimos, I choose you! Deimos, not looking up from his book and catching it: You need an Ultra ball to catch this Legendary Pokémon.

Meridian: Are you tall enough to play basketball though? Gabi: Are you calling me short? Meridian: No, I'm calling you vertically challenged.

Pax: You need to be more careful! Ethean who was dragged into Pax's issue (and lost his entire career because of it): Careful? CAREFUL?! I'LL CAREFULLY WRAP MY HANDS AROUND YOUR THROAT-

Deimos: You know, I used to play back in my gory days. Artemis: ... You mean glory days? Deimos: Ah, that too.

Artemis: SSSHIT- I BURNT MY LIP- Cassiopeia: ...Why the fuck would you even drink coffee with a METAL STRAW in the FIRST PLACE?? Artemis: BECAUSE WE WERE OUT OF THE PLASTIC ONES!

The Director: I was born for politics. I have great hair and I love lying.

Jack: And what did we learn, Vesper? Vesper, begrudgingly: Tackling someone isn’t the correct response to being asked a simple question.

Ethean: What happened?! Pax: Do you want the long version or the short version? Ethean: Sh-short?? Pax: Shit's fucked. Ethean, facepalming:: Okay, long. Pax: Shit's very fucked.

Jack, opening a bottle of Hot Chocolate: Guess I'll drink my sorrows away.

Cassiopeia: *aggressively throws a pencil at Deimos* Deimos, deadpan: Oh no. I’ve been stabbed. I’ve been impaled.

Kaelus (Lyorna's Dad): Don’t worry, I have a permit. The Junction: ...This just says “I can do what I want”.

Kaelus: Exactly. NOW GET OUT OF MY FUCKING PLANET -

Tagging (gently): @sleepy-night-child, @kaylinalexanderbooks, @smol-feralgremlin, @oh-no-another-idea, @littleladymab,

@winterandwords, @cowboybrunch, @eccaiia, @sarahlizziewrites, @illarian-rambling

@agirlandherquill, @anoelleart

@leave-her-a-tome, @writernopal, @anyablackwood, @unstablewifiaccess, @forthesanityofstorytellers

@i-can-even-burn-salad, @cakeinthevoid

@lassiesandiego, @thepeculiarbird, @clairelsonao3, @memento-morri-writes, @starlit-hopes-and-dreams and OPEN TAG

[cinnamonanddean]

Okay Smallville friends, here we go: finale time.

"And now, the series finale of Smallville" WHAT IF I'M ALREADY SAD

"Special Guest Star: Michael Rosenbaum" wow spoilers much?? I mean not for me obviously but for OG viewers. I would have SCREAMED.

Lois, sweetie, he could be saving people every minute he's doing anything, by that logic. Why is his working at the Planet, etc, any different than spending time with you?

Aww, bye Luthor Mansion. You've been a fun place to stage so, so many Clex fics. Hmm I wonder if there are more fics set there or in the barn loft? I'm torn between them, personally.

Kind of rich for Martha to complain about Clark moving on when she hasn't been around for years. "This is our home" okay but you left him here. He's had to cope without you. It's not fair to put the responsibility of keeping the past alive on his shoulders alone.

Oh no his vows 😭😭😭

I feel like we don't have enough time to wrap up this (rather dull) Darkseid plotline AND have a wedding AND bring Lex back? I know this is a double episode but still. Although I suppose Lex's scene will be short and right near the end.

Oh no her vows 😭😭😭

Again I ask: has there ever been a TV wedding that just goes smoothly?

At least Lois's dress is nicer than Lana's. That bow haunts me.

Is he gonna walk down with her AGGHHHH this is so sweet 😭

Uh oh. Lois girl, pay attention, that's not the right ring. Oh thank god for Chloe.

Can't believe they're doing this to Oliver ☹️ hasn't he suffered enough?

So wait: did Clark Luthor not have powers? Did I miss that? I swear he was throwing people around and shit.

Lol is that a Herve Leger bandage dress on Lois?

Agggh Tom does vulnerable so well. "I can't, Dad" just like a little baby boy, I weep.

OH GOD I KEEP FORGETTING ABOUT ALT!LIONEL, it's a fucking jump scare every time.

Oh my god so this Lex is a fucking Frankenstein?? That's...weird. A Frankenlex.

OH MY GOD HE'S GONNA TAKE TESS'S HEART

IS THAT MICHAEL?? Wait probably not, we didn't see his face.

YES GIRL KICK THEIR ASSES

YES GIRL KILL THAT OLD BASTARD!

God this Darkseid CG is so bad

Omg omg omg omg omg OH MY GODDDDD

Oh I hate when they take an already blurry photo and then CSI-style ENHANCE! it to magically unblur it

OH MY GOD OKAY HERE WE GO

I see one of the Franken-pieces was his sassy ass mouth. God I've missed him.

Lex, honey, you've been back for thirty seconds and you're already waxing poetic about how he says your name??? I see another of the Franken-pieces was the need to make every interaction so incredibly gay. "Yet...with a hopeful finish" oh my god honestly

Apologies in advance: I might have a comment on every line of this dialogue.

Oh dear, you can see the bald cap a bit when he raises his eyebrows. I remember Michael said the bald cap was more trouble than just shaving his head lol

Lord, it wouldn't be a proper Lex return without a history speech. HONEY I'VE MISSED YOUUU!

"that's the thing about memories: you can't forget them" mmmm I don't think that's true baby.

Oh gosh the vitriol.

"You and I - we will both be great men. Because of each other." Honey the WAY you talk about the two of you. THE VOICE CRACK. "We have a destiny together, Clark, only on different sides."

Everything he says sounds like a love confession I'M SO SORRY BUT IT DOES

Stop wait one fucking minute here. The last piece of Clark's little "am I strong enough to face this threat" puzzle, the last person to give him the courage and the conviction to do what he needs to do - is LEX FUCKING LUTHOR??? NOT LOIS NOT HIS PARENTS NOT CHLOE BUT LEX??????? oh my god what is happening that is INSANE OF THEM

I need to watch that again. Gosh I haven't done that since the Lexana scene from Fracture.

HAHA I missed Lex's joke about Lionel's heart the first time around. Why is he so funny

God Michael is so fucking good. He just elevates the tone. It's really what's been missing from these last seasons. The others are good - Tom is so good, I'm not discounting him at all - but Michael is on another level.

Hmm seemed a bit too easy killing the Prophets

Oh poor John Glover. This is Not Good. He was always so suave and cool as Lionel, this is a step down.

Aww look how far our sweet boy has come 😭 I'm so proud of him.

HE'S FLYING 😭😭😭

OH I DIDN'T KNOW WE GOT MORE LEX I THOUGHT IT WAS JUST THE SCENE WITH CLARK

Ahh jeez. I kinda came around to Tess. She wasn't Lex but she was fun.

Oh riiiiiiight, I forgot he gets his memory wiped. Again.

OH MY GOD THE LAST MEMORY IS HIM AND CLARK OF COURSE IT FUCKING IS

Lol what the fuck does he think is happening, now that he can't remember?

THE LUTHORCORP SIGN TURNING INTO LEXCORP THAT WAS SO RAD

Our baby finally in the suit 😭

Girl I don't think they just let you film the President like that. That camera is gonna be taken away IMMEDIATELY.

Oh yeah I forgot about Jimmy. That was...a choice.

ALL HAIL PRESIDENT LEX!!!!

"yes Miss Lane" "that's so hot" girl yes it is.

Oh the theme 😭 what an ending

That was so great. A bit hokey in parts, but overall such a satisfying finale. What a ride.

[libra-stellium]

no bc I have beef with Uranus omg

this whole time I've been like saturn saturn saturn meanwhile uranus has been sifting through my life with her dirty little fingers!!

Once upon a time on March 6, 2019 Uranus entered Taurus and took a vow to be a nuisance in my life for the next 6 years!

Tomorrow Uranus is going to be exact on my 3H until June 15 and I'm expecting something to happen with my neighbors that is going to be the most annoying thing I've ever dealt with. Now I could be right or it could be something worse because i'm expecting the neighbors issue and uranus is unexpected shit smh

ALSO on May 21, 2024 I started my Uranus trine Uranus transit and one of the things for it is "you may be inclined to throw over an existing personal relationship in order to liberate yourself from the restrictions it imposed" and I feel like I'm gonna have to go no contact with my aunt as well bc she's making the choice to be on my mother's side. Literally on May 21 she shared pics of my trip with my mother without my consent and I specifically told her multiple times don't talk about my business with this person i'm no longer in contact with and now my mother knows where I was, when i was there, what i was doing, who i was with like what the fuckkkk??? and my aunt had the nerve to be like "oh I'm tired of lying to my sister she was sad and asking for you so i showed her" YOUR SISTER IS A MANIPULATIVE NARCISSITIC BITCH and you can get cut off too!! Her and her sister with their aqua moons in my 12H are probably gonna be completely out of my life next year and that's insane to think about!! I literally won't have any immediate family in my life after that......bc they cannot stop themselves from fucking me over.....just wow

But Uranus isn't done with me!!! I've got a lovely (derogatory) Uranus opposite Pluto transit June 25 2024 - November 10 2024 and what can I expect??? "Change may come through persons with upsetting surprises" G R E A T bc my birthday is right in the middle of that with all the Libra transiting my 8H

It's not all bad (I guesssss) bc I just finished a Uranus sextile Saturn transit from April 14, 2023 - May 18, 2024 in my 1H and it was:

opportunity to make creative changes through a system

I tried many different routines during this time to work on my physical body and my mental health

superiors will be impressed with innovative ideas, you may be rewarded with a higher position in that particular system

Stuff at work came pretty easy and they did end up seeing me like someone the other staff could go to for questions

I also have a Uranus trine Neptune transit right now ending July 1 and that one is cute it's about being more involved in spiritual studies, working hard with others to actualize beliefs about how the world should be and try to help loved ones grow and that's honestly the norm for me lol I'm always looking up something for astro and tarot or literal religion, telling people what I think of the world events (free palestine) and telling friends what they can do to improve their lives!

I still want to throw hands with Uranus bc this is still ridiculous! I have 5 Uranus aspects in my chart I never paid attention to but they would explain a lot!!! I would like a surprise birthday party not surprise traumatic events lmfao

[feuqueerfire]

Lovely Runner Live Blogging

I've been seeing the “i found you girl i like being around you” edits on tiktok but before then, i’d also heard about the show and saw an ep 1 clip of when she runs up to him at the swimming pool. i’m a time travel show enjoyer and this show has been getting such good reviews, so I’m excited. my last few shows have been quite dark and violent and i kinda wanna go for another such show but think a lighter (yet emotional) show might do me some good so that i don’t burn out

Ep 1 (June 25)

2009

omg…

ah, he encouraged her to live through this time when she was contemplating suicide and ig later on she will do the same bc he unfortunately takes his own life before the time travel i think

Dec 31, 2022

13 years, how old were they then and how old are they now?

oh i knew she was a fan but she’s a biiiig fan

ah, they were in high school at the same time and his high school was across hers

some fans hate Sunjae bc he’s too popular and getting opportunities

the band members also seem to not like him and it could be bc of his popularity but he also seems resistant to being an idol in general and wants to retire so that might have smth to do with it

wow she’s really having a tough day: rejected from job bc it has no elevator and she has a wheelchair, late to the concert, and then lost the ticket omg

this scene of Sunjae putting in his in-ear and going on stage is now iconic to me bc of the edits, kept expecting to hear “i found you girl i like being around you” as background music loll

she’s really determined to be positive and make the most of everything, i expect a breaking point soon though

oh, in hyuk doesn’t want him to retire

phone crack

wheelchair stops

yeah the tears finally. what a fucking day

hehe they meet in the current timeline

lolll her getting annoyed that her friend came just when she could’ve been getting a ride w Sunjae

what is that jar that she gave him?

was it Sunjae who saved her from the accident?

the watch was weird for a second. i guess that's gonna be The Object that takes her back/causes everything

ahh he took meds and jumped off into the swimming pool.

this reminds me a bit of True Beauty but like the friend who passed away

time of death: Jan 1, 2023. 12am

dead at 34, so was 21 in 2009? 19 or 20 interactional age?

The fact that she Just saw him alive and seemingly well a few hours ago must make it even more unbelievable

Traveled back

her legs work again

okay, I'd seen this Instagram edit of this scene as the very first thing I saw from this show but I didn't know when I first watched it just how awkward/embarassing this is T.T

aw, is he also going through something now? her talking about how he went through this alone made him soften

SHE SAID SARANGHAE SUNJAE-AH?! please

her still being like 'this is my dream' oh she's gonna be mortified when she realizes this is real in a time travel universe

lolol she's like I'm not dreaming? Fuck, am I dead?

pls i'm dying, Sunjae's so confused while she's acting as if they're both dead now (and mustn't cross the bridge)

so did Sunjae take the watch?

Ah, he probably had to quit being a swimmer and become an idol in the original timeline too because of his shoulder

June 2008

So are they seniors in high school right now?

ahh she gets to see her grandma from 14 years ago when she still recognized Sol before alzheimers or whatever T.T

Aw, Sol cries every time she looks at Sunjae

ah, the parallels of Sunjae holding the umbrella over Sol and asking why she's crying now and in the original timeline

I watched around the first 30-40 minutes of this episode on my iPad while I was on the train (and also like 10 minutes in a restaurant lol). I'm likely going to have to take the train a lot starting the second week of July so I had been thinking that maybe I'll save this one for that time and watch like some raunchy BLs and GLs now that I can't watch on the train but the first ep was quite good, I think I'll binge it now oof.

Ep 2 (July 6)

Since Episode 1, I've watched My Stand-In Eps 1 - 11, Blank Season 1, and reread Mistborn: The Final Empire.

"i can fool a 19-year-old, right?" lol Sol

who is this guy? i know there's a love triangle, is this the second lead?

the people who go back in time/become younger scolding the other kids who seem the same age as them is always funny

ah, so funny, he's the first guy Sol stanned

lmfao please why's he running after the bus

the little icons getting farther and farther away and the song about going farther away playing lmfao

omg, she can't tell him the future/what will happen if he does something? time stops?

woah, you really could just stop time and do a bunch of stuff while shouting future facts lmfao

pls, this future-telling grandma cosplay

Sunjae jealous of Taesung already

how does she keep finding herself in these situations, plssss

like Sunjae is literally so correct to be like what the fuck like actually but also T.T

that guy is indeed Sunjae's father and lmfao Sunjae was the one who borrowed the porn/erotic VHS that Sol's mother has been on the dad's case about

overly dramatic crosswalk scene but i guess it's fine since it's mirroring how she probably got into her accident originally and she has trauma from it

she's the one who gave Sunjae an umbrella first! Also i've def seen this scene from a tiktok or smth

pls so he didn't even mean to borrow the erotic video? smh

this is kinda like My School President when Tinn was trying to impress Gun but everything went wrong and he was being a loser lol

so these two episodes effected the future and there's a photo of Sunjae and Sol on the table but it didn't change the death

Ep 3 (July 6/7)

ah, so he didn't injure himself this time?

hilarious that he can't seem to confess while she's fangirling and cooing over him

the dad left his shoe like cinderella lmfao

eughhhh she's like fuck, you don't want me to be your fan anymore? let's be friends! while he's trying to confess

Sunjae's dad dramatic + full of expectations and pressure + getting ahead of himself

and Sunjae also not tell him about the injury

omg her brother and her friend are both home not noticing the fire in their sight?

does that much water even do anything to a fire? feels like you're not supposed to be doing that...

I wish they hadn't done this fire scene so humorously with the brother and friend, kinda took away from the weight of it. also i wonder if the fire or her mother burning her hand won't still happen bc stuff like the shoulder injury or the ball hitting Im Sol still happened even if in a different way than the original timeline

aw, glad his dad understood

lol she's drunk, how cute

is she gonna forget the confession and kiss? since she's yknow legit drunk. i wonder if ppl made a fuss about it because if it was a bl, this would def have been Discussed in the fandom

ah, ofc she doesn't rmr

bruh aghh it's like I can see where this is going with her listening to the recording + Taesung spotting her + Sunjae being far enough behind that he'll see them (+ he thinks he confessed last night and expects her to remember the kiss too)

i'm gonna kill somebody, she didn't even pause so the "I like you" is just playing with nobody to hear

omg travelling to original timeline

girl what?! how could you say you want to date Taesung or is that not really happening or like what's going onnnnn

Ep 4 (July 7)

Oh, Sunjae had not only saved her but was at the hospital too. He'd liked her throughout his high school time i guess but what about that final night, did he recognize her even then?

oh, he had. wild

ohhh she gave him a bunch of the candy that night that she had given him the very first time when she mistook him for a mailman

hmm okay so the Sunjae POV we got of that night was the original timeline before Sol's time travel thing, right? because the photo wasn't there? and the timeline that Sol's waking up in right now is slightly different based on what she had done?

ok the future had indeed changed

omg what the hell, why did that timeline's Sol reject Sunjae like that, like in this timeline, they were friends??? unless Sunjae was being a creep fr

i got spoiled about she can come back 3 times but how does she know only 1 time is left? also it's just been 10 days?! so why did Sol react like that, wtf

ah, so it's like she's kinda fighting with her 19-year-old self from the past who's in love with Taesung? and doesn't know Sunjae?!?! weird...

so the 19-year-old Sol thought she was possessed because her memory from when older-Sol came back was missing... interesting and complicating

lmfaoo exactly, I was saying she could stop time but shouting out future facts. hilarious to have her shouting celeb marriages

plsss how's she asleep on his floor

"i don't make friends with girls. how can a girl and a guy be friends?" alright lol.

why do we have Hyunjoo pooping her pants and that furthering her romance (?) with Sol's brother come onnn

ah, Taesung mommy issues and feelings of abandonment

yknow I do like Taesung and Im Sol's banter and back-and-forth

i'm cryinggggg, not young-Sol's birthday event for Taesung

it's suchhh a long song, i'm dying. and young Sol's fashion pls

hehe Sol telling Taesung how to treat young-Sol is cute actually

so many weird men... that taxi that went away? and now this guy...

is this Sol's accident but in this timeline?

ah, Sol realizing that Sunjae had saved her

okay, in that original timeline, i thought they just called a random number maybe and was confused and ig that's true but Sunjae specifically called Im Sol's number? or what? how'd he know it? and he knew that it was her he was talking to.

Ep 5 (July 7)

i wonder how the accident happened the first time and why Sunjae was there back then

this bra returning scene reminds me of True Beauty but I can't remember what Suho was trying to give Im Jukyeong, idk why I keep thinking pads??

okay i was gonna be tormented, so I skimmed and it's on ep 2 of True Beauty. She accidentally gave Suho a bag that said "thanks for keeping my bare face a secret" but he hadn't recognized her, so to get it back, she'd said that it has pads (i remembered this part at least)

cryingggg at her being like hmm he said he can't be friends with girls, so all those "just friends" rumours with girls were all real romances (as idol Sunjae). anyway i doubt it bc he seemed to forever be in love with her even over a decade later and that's just a trope I'm gonna have to get used to.

yesss i love a girl saving a guy from the common motorcycle/car trope and also girl kabadoning guy

Sol is cute trying to block all mentions of the swimming Olympics from Sunjae but plsss it's all becoming romantic moments and also iffy when you think about young-Sol having a boyfriend

oh, cop mentioning burying a body... i think I've heard that this show has a serial killer

in the original timeline, the taxi driver with the key indeed did something? but this time the other guy got there? and he's the serial killer or what

damn, taxi driver has Sol's flip phone

not Sol's brother and Sunjae meeting but Sunjae being punished for giving Sol alcohol

cryinggg Sunjae being curious and looking at Taesung's profile but he finds out

pls Sunjae getting mad at Sol's inability to bike reminds me of Tinn yelling at Gun about not knowing any math (My School President). when even the down bad secret crush bearing Sunjae and Tinn lose their minds teaching Sol and Gun lmfao

girl, why is Sunjae buying the same jacket as Taesung T.T but ig they're gonna have him fill in for the vocal... but he's not gonna fill in for Taesung

how humiliating to run into Taesung just as Sunjae bought and wore the bright red jacket because Taesung owns it too yikesss

and that's how the eclipse happened, though Taesung isn't in it for much longer i guess?

Taesung watching Sol watch Sunjae perform reminds me of Twinkling Watermelon

oh, intense yelling from Sol

double whammy of hearing the confession recording finally and Sunjae also telling her to break up with Taesung at the same time

Ep 6 (July 8)

ah, I’m Sol broke up with Taesung but I don’t know if that’s the end of it… but she also knows Sunjae’s confession…

sunjae is quite fun to watch like his despair at his “breakup with taesung” thing going wrong vs joy when taesung got broken up with

Sol’s brother does bother me, why is he so annoying

pls both Sunjae and Sol holding back to appear cool/not “shake the other’s heart” aghhh

Taesung’s “Oh, I think I liked you a lot” is funny

not Taesung getting into a car crash, damn it

so is Sep 1 the day her accident happens? I don’t remember the date. is it gonna happen again even though the bridge thing already happened? or is it a different thing?

Taesung’s dad (?) Kim cop is investigating the case of a he dead bod?

nooo now he has their address bc of grandma

oh, Sunjae confession

Taesung in hospital but his dad doesn’t visit and his friend doesn’t believe in him + he calls Sunjae to let him know that Sol’s mother is at the hospital, oh man

aw mannn Sol rejecting Sunjae because she knows she’s not in the right timeline and is gonna have to leave soon etc. does she realize she’s the one he liked in the original timeline too? he’s talking about liking the rain and on the original timeline radio show he also mentioned it

not having to take an umbrella to Sunjae on the day of Sol’s accident! and after she almost stayed home all day

omg she’s realizing right now that she was his first love back then too and she didn’t “confuse him”

tbf maybe this mans would’ve gotten her even if she didn’t leave right then. a fucking kidnapping

omg this taxi fucker really took her Again D:

Ep 7 (July 8)

oh on that original accident too Sol missed her stop on the bus and Sunjae was waiting with her in the bus, that’s how he was there on the time of her accident on save her

i’m watching this on the subway on my commute to/from work but there are two people talking in korean beside me and i feel awkward watching a kdrama beside them lol

okay they left a couple minutes later

oh at this bridge where her original accident happened is where she dropped that watch and the first time she time travelled, right?

omg who the hell grabbed her in this timeline? bc taxi driver was in the taxi still

good job to sunjae for connecting everything and figuring out the reservoir lmfao

ah, she went back to her time again and the young-Sol is back but also that's kind of oh no in a way, though Sunjae's clever i wonder if he'll be able to figure it out?

i knew from pics i saw that she can use her lefts in the future

Sunjae survived too

pls not her getting mistaken for a sasaeng, i don't even wanna watch anymore

what a different life

damn, young-Sol had another kidnapping a year later?

oh naurrr is Sunjae doing the "who are you? do we know each other?" thing because young-Sol did this to him after he helped her with the kidnapper?

oh he's not even here, it was a scenario in her head lol

lmfao crying, this Sunjae lovesss the attention and fame (though not the stalking)

the shenanigans of them justtt missing each other every time

i can't believe we're getting random enemies-to-lovers right now, especially with them texting each other antagonistically, this is soooo fun

i seriously need to go to sleep but ahh

owww

oh, the concert didn't happen

ah, and they met on the bridge again

35 minutes after my bedtime already, gonna take a while to fall asleep too, whelp

Ep 8 (July 9)

omg Sunjae got the time capsule egg before it got torn down and he even waited on Jan 1, 2023 fully expecting her to come - and she did, so why didn’t they meet?

and Sunjae got the watch from the time capsule

hmmm would he happen to travel back in time at all? bc she travelled back with his watch and maybe he can travel back with her watch?? esp if smth happens to her idk

lmfao pls not the hotel where they can be alone together

but also he’s an idol going with a random girl lmfao

i loveeeee Sol omg she’s so funny and endearing as she’s talking about how she didn’t mean they should have a passionate night and also mentions that they had crushes on each other in a throwaway line but she doesn’t wanna skip intros and get to the conclusion But she’s not judging sunjae for thinking that, they just have different values lmfao what a cutie but sunjae’s gonna act clueless like oh? what were you thinking as if he doesn’t know what this insinuates

i loveeee celeb/non-celeb romance esp when it actually shows the reporters and rumours and fans and such and how they can affect/limit the relationship

he has such a big house why not hide the cut out in some random storage room omg

pls and now Sunjae thinks she plans to stay the night and have sex lmfao

true Inhyuk would be like what the hell, Sunjae can’t fall for Im Sol again!!

Taesung?

Inhyuk talking about how Sunjae’s liked only Im Sol this whole time and kept going back to her old house whenever he was drunk while Sol can hearrrrr

ah, she confessed that she used to like him too

i kept being nervous that Taesung would somehow be in the house but Sunjae/Sol first kiss!

isn't it crazy fr, after 15 years you finally meet again and this time the girl you've loved forever confesses back and you kisssss and it's not a shitty one either

what the hell, the fuckass taxi driver is here too? that was indeed Taesung before right or did i mistake taxi driver for Taesung, I hope not

"Even if somebody sent me back to the past, I would never gamble with my future" whelp Hyunjoo, don't foreshadow too hard

the stalker makes me nervous both in terms of what if that person was the person who was knocking or whatever the night Sunjae died and also what if she finds out that Sunjae's dating Sol and does something to either of them?

okayyyy, so the taxi driver mans went and attacked Sunjae, was it the same thing in the previous iterations too?

I listened to the Afternoona Soju podcast episode and learned about 2 scenes: Sunjae and Taesung drink and do karaoke together and cuddle to sleep, and Sunjae's speech envelope + Sol's resignation letter get swapped so he ends up saying that out loud as a speech

Ep 9 (July 9)

so as hinted, a year after she came back to the current timeline, in the young timeline 2009, the taxi guy kidnapped Im Sol again and Sunjae saved her again and that's what caused that guy to get jailed until now

i loveee 2009 freshman Sol's hair, beautifully bangs and wavy hair

Hyunjoo's joyoush "hmm" and nod at 33:50 after Sol asks her if it was her idea is sooooo good omg i replayed several times

omg, the sudden "are you really from the future?" that had like no build-up, so I was surprised hehe

ahhh they kissed accidentally ofc they did, ig we'll see Sunjae and Sol married by the end?

Ep 10 (July 10)

ah, makes sense that Sunjae wouldn’t actually believe the time travel stuff oof

pls hiding under the table is so T.T

oh she’s telling Taesung about the time travel too

i like it when in a love triangle the guys try to impress the family like now with the flooding and in Ture Beauty with the dumplings but it’s annoying when they let it get the best of them and don’t care about what’s actually happening like why are you up arguing and making a mess instead of helping clean up wtf

i do like Sunjae Taesung antagonizing when it’s like verbal and witty not physical fights

oof Taesung telling Sunjae that he shouldn’t even be jealous of him bc Sol clearly likes Sunjae

Superstar K vs going to the states

ah, he digs up the time capsule and figures out that he dies (possibly because of trying to protect Sol) that time in the future

oh, the billboards changed and Eclipse is releasing their new album instead of Sunjae’s stabbing hmm i can’t tell bc im watching on my phone but is Sunjae in that photo?

Ep 11 (July 10)

ARE THEY GONNA GET BACK REFUNDS FOR THE PLANE AND THE REHABILITATION? and are they gonna get the luggage back?!

not this kissing gossip lmfao

yknpw technically this is a noona romance in this timeline 3x Sol x 20 Sunjae (krn age)

the “should we roll back another minute? if you give me another chance, i’ll do my best” thing is soooo cute like Sunjae fr was just going for the remote not the kiss like Sol thought

i’m crying from second hand embarrassment at the parents and brother finding them like this and am dreading the hundreds of condoms reveal T.T plssss and even Basic instincts got brought up again and Sunjae having to cover Im Sol’s ears i cannotttttt, how humiliating

the condoms flying out like this is really and truly killing me i can’t watch fuckkk if i was sunjae i would have to leave move away say good bye to Sol like life death and time could not make me stop loving you but this… in front your family? yeah i’d learn to live

lmfao the family meeting was very funny

he sings sonagi for her on a stage ahhh first of all he’d died but she gets to see him sing again + knows it’s about her this time

ah this fucking killer mans

Ep 12 (July 10)

ofc both Sol and Sunjae are gonna try to stop the murderer

lol will Sunjae get jealous of In Hyuk lmao

i can't watch this toilet water nothing pls at least use the water that's stored in the tank of the toilet not in the fucking bowlll

is the institution just that they made out? because i don't think they had sex?

lmfao maybe now the MIL and FIL will finally get along

omg, she's pretending to have gone back so that Sunjae doesn't stay with her at this place where the attacker's gonna come

oh also i'd figured out the 3 lives thing a while back btw i'd been like how does she know w/ certainty that she has 3 chances but the clock said 3, then 2, and now it's at 1

Ep 13 (July 11)

just go so frustrated that Youngsoo figured out that Sol was setting a trap bc that guy put his hand on her to check but Sol ended up shouting for Detective Kim eughhh such planning and yet

and Sunjae runs into him right then ofc

not Sunjae getting knifed! and falling off he cliff!!!

oh, Sol returned

girl where the hell is Sunjae like nice to see Sol’s life and Taesung but c’mon

i got spoiled about the letter switching and Sunjae giving actor award speech from Sol’s resignation letter so i don’t have like The Suspence for this

ohhh Sunjae’s watch also became a time machine

oh my godddd his time machine also takes Sol back in time for some reason and she literally cuts it off right at the beginning?!?! doesn’t give him the umbrella in the rain

curious about how they’ll explain the killer stuff in the past if Sunjae’s not there to save Sol?

Ep 14 (July 11)

so Sol and family just move away soon after like Sunjae still has his sling? yknow what let me not think too much

lolol articles coming out. i didn’t realize he was just gonna be mc-ing

ahhh Ryu Sun Jae is gonna be acting in Im Sol’s script?!

ouch the script hurts (though she’s plagiarizing so hard from alternate timeline Sunjae!!)

both of them busy trying to reject the script/actor but omg poor Sol. it sucks so bad to be the one who remembers, like when Sunjae used to remember while young Sol forgot and now thisssss after everything

another enemies to lovers arc

okay i was wondering how we’d go back to Sunjae knowing but ig he’ll get dreams and memories

oh, the murderer is gonna attack the sasaeng girl instead?

Sunjae is just Meant to be obsessed with Sol in every timeline ig

yaas the lottery tickets truly a must for a fucking time travel anything

ah the ferris wheel

Ep 15 (July 11)

the taxi driver can’t be obsessed w Sol in this timeline too right esp bc it’s been 15 years since his interest in the original tl

not Sol’s mom trying to set Sol up with sunjae now loll how the tables have turned

lmfao this time it’s Sunjae hiding from Sol when usually it was the other way around in the past timelines

oh, the killer is actually targeting Sunjae straight up this time maybe, not Sol first

Sunjae’s memory coming back in flashes

oh, he's got it all back

omg dramatic. killer guy almost got Sunjae again and then for a second I got nervous that Taesung was gonna crash like the other way so that killer T-bones his car

Ep 16 (July 11)

last ep!! 1h 19 mins instead of the usual 61-63 mins

killer dies just like that

ahh meeting again after remembering

"because he died, somebody else might get to live"

they kiss pretty nice

the parents do make me laugh, the dad being like hah i know Sunjae chose a good, beautiful girl to date while the mother's like hah i know she's no beauty

ah, marriage and wedding, cute

Overall:

A fun show with a fun concept and great acting + romance. It was funny and delightful most of the time, there was a kind of killer/suspense aspect but that wasn't really ever the Focus, Sunjae being killed was the focus; similarly, they didn't thoroughly explain the time travel because the mechanics wasn't the focus, Sol going back was the focus.

I liked Sunjae and Sol together and it was fun seeing how Sunjae was slightly different in the different timelines lol I liked seeing the couple on high school, college, as idol!Sunjae and actor!Sunjae. It did feel a bit like consistency was lost in their relationship but that was the point i guess. It was a very romantic concept, the way they were falling in love in every timeline.

Everything about it was good and I was engaged, I just don’t think I’d think about it much though. Kinda reminds me of When I Fly Towards You c-drama in that way; a cute youthful romance drama but I'm not hung up on it. At least it kept me company during my commute of the first week at my new internship.

Rating: 7/10

[easypeasylindyvesey]

Summary: After the unforeseen death of Abby’s boyfriend, one of the NHL’s star defenseman and her teammate, she severely struggles with managing her grief. She confides in Jimmy Vesey, who is not only another teammate of hers, but is one of the very few people she has a strong friendship with. That is until that night and the days that followed. Does this life-altering news change the trajectory of their personal perceptions of each other? Or does it entail a chance of crossing boundaries for the risk of moving on?

Word Count (excluding title and heading): 8,446

*(General) Warnings: (foul) language, mentions/discussion of death, suicide attempt (brief, closed door description), eventual confession of feelings, grief, panic attack(s), angst, eventual sexual implications but no smut, age gap (24-25/33-35)

----

JANUARY 2028  (Warnings: foul language (omg that’s it?? wow. i’m evolving!))

Did I start off the year in the way I anticipated? Obviously not. When do I ever?

I’m reminded that New York winters tend to be colder than my heart. There have already been two instances where practice was cancelled because of snow, and we just ended up having free days off. Of course, that affected the outcome of some games, but nonetheless, we’re reacting to it appropriately.

And on an unexpected day off, what does Jimmy want to do?

Drive to Brooklyn and go ice skating.

Well, we end up having to wait until the afternoon, around 3:00 or so, until it stops snowing and breaks out into a bright blue sky.

Glide at Brooklyn Bridge Park can not be compared to the Rockefeller rink by any means, but it’s never frowned upon to leave Manhattan and its repetitive antics behind for a little bit. There’s actually not too many people skating by the time we find a bench and lace up our skates, but that never hurt anybody.

“Have you even ever been here?” I ask Jimmy. “Just wanna know why you wouldn’t wanna go back to Rockefeller.”

“New year, new experiences,” is all he tells me.

I slightly nod. “Got it.”

“Besides,” Jimmy interjects, “the views are unbeatable. You can literally see the Manhattan skyline. Hey, if we look close enough, we might be able to find the apartment.”

“That is most certainly a long shot, but I’ll take your word for it.”

After our skates are tied, we step on the ice, doing casual skating motions to get used to it. Music is playing nearby, it’s really fucking cold, and based on the thin clouds over the horizon, I have no doubt there’s going to be a beautiful sunset.

We don’t automatically separate from each other, as both of us look around, taking in the views. I forget there’s so many different towns in New York to explore, especially when you’re based in the city. There’s Queens, Staten Island, the Bronx, and now Brooklyn. Maybe this should be a goal of ours this year: visiting the rest of the NYC boroughs. It’d be four new trips, all within a decent driving distance. It sounds a lot more reasonable than driving 6 hours to Boston and an even further drive to Toronto with Will.

Yeah. About that.

I let him know that I was definitely interested in still going up there during the All-Star weekend. He told me it would probably be the last 3 days. We’d take a flight out, have his parents pick us up at the airport, and just spend that time back at his house, getting to know his mom and dad. I’m still not certain it’s going to end up being a casual visit. There’s definitely something secret planned.

Whatever the case may be, I’m just looking forward to an actual trip. Jimmy doesn’t know about it yet, but if he ends up going back home for the break anyway, then there won’t be a use in telling him. Of course, it would end up being admitted on accident later on.

As for those two and their animosity toward each other, I’ve taken it upon myself to stay the hell out of it. I’m not saying that I won’t listen to the both of them, but I am not picking sides. The key is to hang out with them separately before I surprise them with the three of us going somewhere together, where they’ll be forced to get along. Being embarrassed in public has happened to everyone a fair share of times, but if they see two grown men getting into it, with one tiny woman attempting to break up their verbal scuffle, who is everyone going to look at first? Me.

In order to keep my mental sanity, I try to not entertain the possibility of that actually happening. I focus on where I am right now. As much as I would have been okay with hanging out at the apartment and spending our snow day in the way they should be utilized, I’m fine with Brooklyn and their fancy shmancy outdoor rink.

We start out by skating around the border of the rink, taking in the sights and strangers. Carefully moving around in slow, steady strides, observing the views around us, I break the silence before it gets to be too long. “I keep forgetting how relaxing this usually is.”

I can imagine Jimmy giving me a weird face in return. “That’s because you’re not under any pressure.”

I elbow him through his coat. “Yeah, and that we can go incognito, along with not having every moment of ours be televised.”

“There should be some sort of thing where we just don’t even end up playing a game,” he suggests. “Both teams compete in a speed contest around the rink, winner gets bragging rights and access to the best skate sharpening tools out there.”

“Don’t forget the trophy,” I remind him.

He sighs. “How could I forget about the plastic gold thing? Here Abb, want a gold star?”

Giving him a light shove, I start to skate a little further past him while maintaining enough space where we can hear each other. “I’m already a gold star.”

Jimmy pauses. “No, you’re silver at best.”

“And you’re bronze.”

“Hey, I can’t argue with that.” He catches up to me. “Single digit ice time doesn’t earn you medals.”

“Oh, would you cut it out?” I roll my eyes, smiling. “If you were not good enough to be in this league, you would have never been given the opportunity. You would not be here right now. Living your best life in New York doesn’t happen for the weak.”

“It is most certainly a life,” he trails off.

I take that comment with a hint of sarcasm instead of choosing to analytically reflect on it. I’m not sure if it’s what he truly meant, but I am not ruining the mood by asking.

We make it halfway around the rink before I stop short and he almost trips over my skate. “The hell you stoppin for?” He breathes out.

 I skate toward the glass rail. “The sky.”

It’s a 50/50 mesh of pink and orange, with the slightest tinge of yellow. I start fumbling in my coat pocket for my phone, taking off my glove so I can unlock it and open my camera, snapping a couple pictures before opening Instagram and taking a picture with that camera for my story highlight. After putting the location, I make sure it fully uploads before closing the app.

Turning around, I notice Jimmy’s phone is out too, aimed toward the top of the sky. I try jumping on my skates to photobomb the view.

He shakes his head. “Lemme get a pic of you.”

I scrunch up my face. “Really?”

“Yeah. He’s finally gonna be in one.”

I give him a little smile and lean against the rail, keeping it plastered on my face as I keep an eye on the camera lens.

After what I can imagine one too many pictures, unless he took a burst, he lowers his phone and looks toward me as if he’s going to drift off. “Stay here.”

And so he glides away. My best explanation is that he’s going to ask someone to take a picture of us. Sticking to that goal might not end up seeming like too much of a challenge for him after all.

It’s really unfortunate because I wanted us to have a pic together on New Year’s Eve. Since he got slightly buzzed and somewhat altered the mood, I’m not sure if there was ever going to be a good time to ask. I know it wouldn’t have worked after he stormed off. He was already in somewhat of a mood before everyone arrived. I guess it worked in my benefit, because staring at the potential photo we could’ve had would only be outweighed with bad memories instead of good. And I’m so tired of the bad.

As I continue to admire the view, out of the corner of my eye, I see him approach me next to the rink and tap me on the arm, whipping around as I catch him looking at me. “Gotta switch spots,” he informs.

Skating in front of him, I move over to the left side, and since I’m already left-handed, I feel more comfortable taking pictures if I’m on the left. I don’t know if there’s a justifiable phenomena for that, but it never fails.

A random couple stands in front of us, with the man holding Jimmy’s phone in his hand. “All right guys!” He says enthusiastically. “Smile!”

So we do.

The phone is lowered and returned, us exchanging “thank yous” and continuing to remain by the rail, taking in the view. Winters have some of the best sunsets, and I’m fortunate enough to live in a place where I can experience each of the four seasons.

“I’ll send it to you later,” Jimmy tells me.

I nod. “Okay.”

He’s able to pick up on the short response. “You alright?”

I gaze out, fixating on the skyline. “Yeah.”

“That didn’t sound convincing.”

“Well, then. You caught me.” I lean my arms over the rail.

“He painted such a nice view tonight,” Jimmy nudges my shoulder. “It’s almost as if he knew we’d be here.”

My face contorts. “I don’t think so.”

“Hey, come on. Don’t do that.”

“Do what?”

“Be doubtful.”

“I’m not being doubtful. Just thinking rationally.”

He sighs, the frost leaving his mouth. “Not always your best approach.”

I don’t even bother to argue back, so I stand up and return the favor by nudging him. “Don’t test me.”

“Oh, I could never do that,” Jimmy defends. “Otherwise I’d be pushed over the rail.”

“And down into the water?” I smile. “I’d pay good money to see that.”

“You know what I would pay good money for?”

“Me moving out?”

“I was gonna say us going all the way this year, but I mean, I wouldn’t be opposed.” He flashes me a smile to prove he’s joking. Deep down in wherever his soul might be, I know he’s not.

I don’t respond.

“Am I crazy to think that?” 

“No.” I watch the colors in the sky start to sink lower. “Not at all.”

I feel a shiver roll down my spine. Either it’s due to the cold or perhaps it’s my nervous system warning me in some way.

“It’s definitely not out of the question,” Jimmy suggests quietly.

“Never,” I curtly reply. “Everyone’s gotta be willing to put in the effort, that’s all.”

I listen to the sound of nearby speakers, blasting music so everyone around the rink can hear it.

“It’s just not really what I’m thinking about right now, you know? I don’t want you to get so far ahead that you’re missing out on what you currently have.”

“Trust me, I won’t. This entire thing feels like a documentary.”

“Should we go book a film crew?”

“Can’t be that hard.”

“No, wait.” I pretend to ponder. “You might be onto something. This could make great reality TV!”

It really could.

We get ourselves off the rink and return our skates before beelining toward the Jeep and preparing for our 10 minute ride back, which turns into 25 because of traffic. New year, same shit.

The apartment, for whatever reason, feels colder as we walk back in, which does not help with the slush we dragged in on our shoes. We let them sit by the door in hopes it’ll melt while hanging up our coats.

“Same time next snow day?” Jimmy jokes, walking across the floor.

I remain by the door. “Book it.”

“Want me to make dinner?”

Sarcastically, I take my hand and hold it near my chest. “You would do that for me?”

“Long as I don’t burn the place down.”

I roll my eyes. “Shut up. You won’t.”

“Anyway,” he says, changing the subject, “you got any ideas?”

“I’m thinking chicken fettuccine alfredo, but there’s no alfredo sauce, so I’d resort to pesto sauce instead.” 

“Sign me up. You want to take your shower first so that I don’t interrupt when you’re cooking?”

Since when has he acted this thoughtful? I’m starting to think never.

I give him a little smile. “If you don’t mind…”

“Yeah, go for it.” He walks over to the coffee table and retrieves the remote. “No rush.”

Could this be the turning of a new leaf I’ve been waiting for??

No, it’s not. Don’t get sucked up in his little act.

Heading into my room, I look around my closet and find my Martha’s Vineyard shirt. Damn. I actually forgot about that.

It’s ironic I haven’t even worn it once yet. 

After finding a pair of sweats in my dresser drawer, I tuck the pajamas under my arm and head for the bathroom, shutting the door and turning on the light before pulling out the faucet and watching the water fall out. I take a look at myself in the mirror. My face is still red from the cold. Other than that, everything about my appearance remains unchanged.

As I step into the shower and pull the curtain closed, I feel like I could stay in here forever. Warm water is severely underappreciated during the winter. I’ll pay the heating bill, for all I care. Surely, Jimmy wouldn’t mind if I took an expense off his plate.

I cut my shower time incredibly short because I truly am hungry, so I dry off, change, and throw my hair up into an unbrushed ponytail, opening the door and walking out of the bathroom, retracting back onto the tiled floor to turn off the light. Going back into my room, I put my towel and underwear in my laundry basket and head back out into the kitchen.

My feet stop abruptly, as I’m taken aback by the sound of boiling water.

Jimmy turns around, standing near the pot. “I just dropped the fettuccine in there,” he says.

Questioning his tactics, I ask him, “You threw in a pinch of salt?”

“Course I did. You don’t wanna be eating bland pasta.”

Okay. This turning over a leaf thing might be real after all.

“You want me to cut the chicken?” 

I shake my head. “It’s already cooked. Just some left over.” I tug at my fingers. “But thanks.”

“Yeah, always.”

“I can take over.” Walking up next to him at the pot, I stir the pasta with the silicone spoon. “You go get a shower.”

“Sure you don’t want my help?” He insists.

I smile, meeting his eyes. “You’ve already done more than enough. Thank you.”

He returns the smile and walks around me, footsteps trailing off into his room and then hearing the bathroom door close less than two minutes later. I take advantage of the alone time by finishing up dinner and having it prepared by the time Jimmy’s done with his shower, taking out two reasonably large bowls and placing them on the coffee table, each with their own utensils and TV on, airing various pregame shows. I retrieve our water bottles from our rooms and place them down next to the bowls, cleaning out the pot by the time the bathroom door opens.

“You didn’t eat without me, did you?” is the first suspicious assumption he makes when he reappears.

“No,” I say over the running water. “It’s already on the table.”

“Oh, sweet,” he says in return, hearing him sit down on the couch as I start drying the pot with the dish rag, placing it back into the cabinet and going over to join him.

Sitting on the other end of the couch, I reach for my bowl and focus on the TV. We sit in silence for a few minutes while trying to figure out how to initiate a new conversation.

“So, uh, quick little question,” I say.

“I might have a quick little answer,” Jimmy replies. I can only imagine one of those dumb smirks appear on his face.

“Are you, uh, staying here during the All-Star break?”

The sound of a fork lightly scrapes against his bowl. “I haven’t fully decided yet, but I’m leaning toward going home.”

I remain quiet.

“We’re not obligated to be here anyway, so I don’t wanna have to stay here if I don’t need to.”

Well, that’s the thing. You stayed here all summer.

“But yeah, I’m definitely getting outta here. Why, you wanna come with?”

I turn my head to look at him. “No, no, no, I’ll stay here.”

“By yourself?” 

My lips draw together. “Why not? I’m not gonna destroy anything.”

“I know that, but I just would hate for you to be alone in here.”

That’s the other thing. I won’t be. Not in here, at least.

But I’m not gonna tell him, probably ever.

“You need a break,” I say. “You’ve quite literally been confined to this place. It’d do wonders. Trust me.”

“Just don’t adopt a cat when I’m gone.”

I guffaw. “You’re right. I won’t.”

He nods.

“I’ll adopt two!”

“Okay, fine. That would be my final straw, though. I’d officially kick you out. Bring them back to your own place.”

“Why won’t you just admit you like cats?” I put a forkful of chicken into my mouth. “You wanna act all macho and say you like dogs, but something in that little brain of yours tells me you would not be opposed to a cute meowing creature running around here.”

“I’m not saying I don’t,” Jimmy seems to contradict. “I just like dogs a little bit more.”

Shaking my head, I turn up the volume. “Lame.”

“Alright, I get it,” he says sarcastically. “God forbid I wanna be mundane. Leave me alone, will ya?”

“Not until you decorate for holidays around here. You don’t have any-”

“I have nothing for Valentine’s Day, before you even ask. And no, I am not buying anything.”

Pointing in his direction, I reach for my water on the table. “Lame again.”

“Men don’t decorate. That’s more of a woman thing.”

“Hey, you’re not pulling the sexist card here. Men can decorate. Y’all just choose not to.”

“It’s weird.”

I make a mental note of that. “Fine. I’m not getting balloons for your birthday, then.”

“Good. I don’t need them.”

“You don’t want cake, either?”

“Just give me a bagel breakfast.”

“Done. No presents?”

“Nope.”

“K. Don’t act all surprised when you don’t see any wrapped boxes.”

“I won’t. I’ve got a good poker face.”

“Have I seen it?”

He extends his arm and pushes my shoulder. “You will in 4 months.”

“Can’t wait.”

For the next 40 minutes, we watch the first period of a game, raving about how good dinner is, along with voicing our own commentary. I want to nitpick his brain a little more in terms of him leaving for break, only so I can plan accordingly. The trip to Toronto will be toward the end, so I have to figure out what I’ll be doing for the beginning. Maybe I will take advantage of the empty apartment.

Or maybe I can pay my condo a visit.

It won’t be the permanent one.

During the 2nd period intermission, both of us finish dinner, so I take our bowls to the sink and wash them out before loading them in the dishwasher. When I close it, I lean back against the countertop and take a minute to watch Jimmy in his rare state of contentment. 

Not being surrounded by that for a week will be odd. I shouldn’t even jump to conclusions yet. I still don’t have a timeframe as to when he’s leaving.

Only difference is he has the full ability now to not even walk back through the door.

—------

“Sure we’re going the right way?”

I stop in the middle of the sidewalk, gloved hands being shoved into my coat pockets. “Jim, we’re literally not going anywhere.”

“So we’re just, walking around aimlessly? That’s the whole point of this?”

Letting out a long sigh, I resume walking. “It’s called a walk for a reason, dumbass.”

We’re continuing our streak of outdoor activities, and nothing says outdoor activities like a walk around the city. I insisted we get out of the apartment for a bit since all we’ve recently been doing is rotting away, and although this is as mundane of an idea as it sounds, we can freeze our asses off in another way.

It’s almost noon, with the sun reaching its highest peak in the sky. Bundled up in our coats and hats, we welcome the cold air to invisibly hit our faces, meaning that we’re also open to the inevitable consequences of frostbite and crimson-colored cheeks when we go back. I’m glad we’re doing this.

“Wanna go sledding?” I joke, pointing to the fresh blanket of snow after last night’s accumulation.

“You got a sled?”

“No. But we can go buy one somewhere!”

“There aren’t any hills around here,” Jimmy confirms to me. “Guess you’re out of luck.”

Listening to our shoes scrape against the slush on the pavement, we follow the curve in the sidewalk, finding ourselves walking further down through Manhattan. My senses heighten when I notice we’re slowly approaching Central Park, almost tripping off the curb because of that lone distraction.

“You sneak in a beer this morning?” I hear him ask.

“I don’t drink that shit.”

“Come on,” he teases. “Sure you didn’t have one?”

“I swear on his grave.”

“Can’t argue with you there.”

Pointing my finger toward the Bethesda Fountain, I start speedwalking. “Look! The water’s spewing out!”

“Almost like you’ve never seen it before!” The sarcasm is extremely strong with this statement.

Ignoring Jimmy’s remark, I make it to the front of the fountain after having to pass several other people, because of the common social aspects you’ll notice in New York is how nobody likes to move. It’s as if they all want to get hit by oncoming traffic because they’re so consumed with the idea of wanting to replicate a statue, not knowing they could easily get pushed over by that one impatient person.

“Wanna go ahead and throw a penny in there?” He remarks again.

“I’m gonna throw you in there,” I mutter to myself.

“What was that?”

“I said that I am gonna throw you in that fountain,” I say loudly, on purpose, just so he can clearly hear me this time.

A few people look at us, and then divert back to what they were previously focused on. That’s another thing you’ll notice in New York. Everyone hears everything.

I’m honestly not surprised at how empty it is, considering how cold it’s been the last few days. This type of weather wants me curled up with blankets on the couch, watching TV, and drinking hot chocolate. But the more I think about it, I really feel the need to break free from the confinement and get outdoors. Winter is the season where you mainly stay inside, given the changes in the weather, but on days where you can watch the sun reflect off the snow, watching it glimmer, you almost start to think it’s not so bad for three months after all.

We walk closer to the fountain, watching the water make continuous circles, it also shining bright as the sun points down on it. I can almost see our reflections. Getting way too close would cause me to fall in. Then Jimmy would get the last laugh, and I’d hate him for it.

“Think it’s safe to drink?”

I turn my head to look up at him. “That’s your question?”

“I’m thirsty!” He complains.

“Then you should’ve brought water with you!” I mock at him.

“Wanna run across and pick up some coffee?”

“But we just got here!”

“We’ll come back!” He rolls his eyes. “God almighty, relax.”

I step closer, invading his personal space. “You don’t ever tell a woman to relax unless you want her to punch your teeth out of your mouth.”

As I trail off, waiting for him to catch up with me once again, I approach the door to the coffee shop on the opposite side of the fountain, holding the door open as I watch him shuffle over, hands in pockets, leaning out to grab the door as I step inside, relishing in the warm air that I have not felt since before we left.

Immediately, the indecisiveness has kicked in. Am I really in the mood for coffee? Or do I want to branch out and steer away from the norm?

So I order a hot chocolate while Jimmy orders his bland, boring, brutally brutal black coffee. Seriously, I don’t know how this man finds that appealing. Unless he tends to not find beauty in the small things. That actually makes sense to me.

We pay and walk back out the door and return to the fountain, opting to sit on a bench in the corner, far away from the people as possible.

“Don’t burn your tongue,” he tells me as I have my mouth on the opening of the cup.

I lower the cup and wrap my hands around the outside. “I’ll make sure your little friend gets the brunt of it,” I say, gesturing toward his lower half.

“I think it’d have its best effect if my pants were off,” he whispers. “Gonna wait till we leave.”

A devious smile forms on my face. “You’d really let me do that?”

“Oh, of course not,” he says, returning to his normal speaking voice. “That’d be a hospital trip, and quite an embarrassing one.”

“Just say it was an accident. You accidentally spilled it on yourself.”

“And it somehow seeped through? They’d know I’m lying.”

“I mean…it just sits there anyway.” I take a sip of my hot chocolate. “Doesn’t really serve a purpose.”

“How else am I gonna pee?” He looks around aimlessly, as if the answer will just fall out of the sky.

“You just won’t,” I say confidently. “Boom. Done.”

“I would love to know how your brain got wired like this.” He scoffs. “You sure didn’t learn it from me.”

“It’s literally been this way since I was seventeen,” I rush in to defend myself. “That wire exists in your brain, too.”

“Yeah, but not quite frequently. You change a normal conversation into an innuendo.”

“That’s where the fun is!” I tap the sides of my cup. “God, you’re literally so boring. Those thoughts are inevitable. It’s not like they’re…illegal or anything.”

“Just inappropriate.”

I pause. “Depends.”

“They about me?”

Thank goodness I didn’t take another sip when I was intending to because I would’ve choked. “Me? Dreaming about you? Ha! Never in a million years.”

“They about….” He continues pestering. “Another man?”

“Oh, get over yourself. No.”

“I overheard at New Year’s how you might get set up.” The intonation in his voice changes with those two words.

“Yeah, I already told them to not even think about it. I’m not ready for that.”

Jimmy nudges me in the arm. “Sure you are.”

“I’m not,” I deadpan. “Still way too soon.”

“Abb,” he says gently in case I start a riot in front of him, which I obviously won’t because we’re in public. “You can’t wait around forever.”

“Funny that you’re doing the exact same thing.”

“It’s different circumstances.”

“Sure, but I just don’t wanna feel unnecessary stress. I’d have to spill my trauma to a stranger. Does the sound of that not terrify you?”

“I mean, yeah, it sounds scary, but if he can’t handle it, let alone you, he doesn’t deserve an ounce of your time.”

I look down at my sneakers. “At least I can refute that since I already know a man whose been through it all with me.”

There’s a pause. “Tell him to give me a call if he starts fucking around with you.”

“Or what?” I turn to look up. “You’re gonna punch him?”

He shrugs. “Eh. Maybe make him lose a tooth.”

“Or burn his little friend,” I whisper hushedly, eyeing toward Jimmy’s lower half again.

“I am officially uncomfortable with this conversation,” he responds, to which I giggle. God, it feels so good to get under his skin like that.

Letting out a sigh, I watch the frost leave my mouth and disappear into the air, looking out at the fountain. I find it admirable how no matter what might be thrown in its path, whether it be inclement weather or the littering of city goers, it manages to continue standing tall, showcasing its beauty and strength. Perhaps that’s something I need to start doing. Maybe it’ll speed this process up so that I can stop thinking about it.

In an attempt to stop thinking about it, I change the subject. “Want me to set you up?”

Jimmy laughs. “Please. All the girls you’re friends with are taken. By our teammates.”

“I’m sure I could find someone. Or just create a fake profile for you on Hinge.”

“Yuck.” I watch his mouth interlock around the opening of his cup, swallowing a little bit of his coffee. “That is, quite literally, the wrong way to date. Filled with a bunch of lies and exploitation through dumb photos.”

“You’ll be happy to know I’ve never resorted to that.”

“Good,” he says, a little bit on the serious side. “You’re too authentic for that.”

I make sure to keep it brief, but I smile in the slightest.

“Besides, you’d be able to detect the lies right away. You don’t even have time to play games.”

I nod in agreement. “Yep. Not anymore.”

“But like….” Oh my God, does he have an off switch? “You wouldn’t be open to a fling?”

I take a few seconds to process what has literally just come out of his mouth before turning my head. “That’s literally considered a game.”

“Oh.” Stupid ass.

“Why? Would you?”

“I, uh-”

“Have done it before, haven’t you?” It comes out so serious as if his response could completely contemplate our friendship moving forward.

“N-no, I have not.”

And then a lightbulb appears atop my head. Right. He hasn’t done the deed yet.

But not all flings require that, right?

“Then what was the stutter for?” I form a smile. “You had to think about what you were gonna say, huh?”

“Just- just short circuited for a quick minute.”

I’m not buying it. “Uh huh. Sure.”

“I did!”

“Okayyy.” I watch a group of birds search around for crumbs on the brick pavement.

“Don’t you wanna get back out there, though?” God, he is so insistent on this. It’s not like it’s any of his business.

Standing up with my empty cup, I respond. “I do. Just not now when I’m having the concept being shoved down my throat.”

“That’s not- that’s not what I’m trying to do.” Jimmy rolls his eyes. “I’m just telling you to at least, even if it’s considered your bare minimum, put it in perspective.”

“I don’t need you telling me what to do.”

“I’m not-”

“Yes, you are, and I’m getting really tired of it.” I walk away from the bench and over to the nearby trash can, discarding my cup before making my way back. Resorting to the opposite end, I sit down, staring out past the fountain, choosing to not engage in any conversation that could send us down into a spiral.

It’s a couple minutes before he says something. “You’re right.”

I keep looking ahead. “About?”

“Pressuring you into the whole dating thing.”

“You’re one to talk for someone who isn’t even doing it.”

“And that may be true, but I’m just-”

“Looking out for me, I know,” I say annoyedly. 

He looks at me, eyes softening. Or maybe squinting due to the wind, who knows. “Not all hope is lost.”

I cock my head. “What are you implying?”

Now he softly smiles. “The truth.”

“Oh, shut up,” I say, my smile getting the best of me.

The corner of my eye picks up the movement of his hand as he pushes himself off the bench and stands before turning around. “I bet you won’t do that on the walk home.”

Lifting myself up, I flash him a smug look. “You thought wrong.”

I follow Jimmy through the sparse crowd and find ourselves back on the sidewalk in no time, braving the nipping winds and the end of morning traffic to return to the one place where there actually is heat. The hot chocolate counts, I guess. Even though it provided me with a temporary feeling of warmth, it lasted longer than anticipated.

And yes, we talk the other ear’s off for the 20 minute walk back. What else is there to do?

Well, just as we turned the corner of the street where the complex is, I stopped walking to see if he would notice, which he didn’t at first, but I picked up a clump of snow and rolled it into a ball with my gloves, and decided on where to aim it, before deciding on his back.

He stopped walking and turned around quite slowly, a confused expression on his face. “That was you?”

I look from side to side. “No…”

Bending down on the sidewalk, it’s his turn for his glove to be filled with snow. “You’re dead.”

Backing up, I try to outrun it, but it hits me at the hood of my coat, a couple pieces trickling down past and down the back of my sweatshirt. “No, you’re dead!”

Returning the favor, I make another snowball, throwing it straight at his midsection, planting my feet on the ground in case he tries to make a run for it.

Surprisingly, he doesn’t, so I bend down to create another one.

Until I’m quite literally swept off my feet as I’m lifted into the air, snowball falling to the pavement and breaking apart as I squeal. “What are you doing?!”

“Seeking my revenge!” 

“Put me down!”

“Are you forgetting something?”

I sigh, feeling my lips grow even more chapped. “Please put me down.”

As I sense the change in gravity, it’s another abrupt gesture that, this time, does not involve getting hit by snow, but rather me hitting it, as I feel my back hit the blanket of snow, my entire body almost covered in the white flakes. Thank goodness it’s fluffy and not rock hard.

And then my legs buck up to meet his, which I guess you could say is the initial catalyst for feeling the entire weight of his body fall on top of me, a low chuckle vibrating from his mouth as I continue laughing. In that moment, I don’t feel like I need to push him off of me. This, unlike the past two instances which involved body contact, is more of a tease rather than a proposed trick up his sleeve.

We spend a couple minutes looking at each other while we feel the snow start to seep into our clothes before Jimmy rolls over next to me, lying in the snow and letting out a sharp exhale, but one that’s filled with adrenaline in contrast to anxiety, dusts himself off, and then helps me up.

Our physical imprints will remain in that very spot until they’re covered up. But both of us know the truth.

—-----

“Over here is the kitchen, which is also easily accessible through the living room area,” the leasing agent explains to Will and I. “Plenty of storage space, room for pretty much anything your heart desires.”

We take a look around. I accompanied Will, as promised, to an apartment tour in Flushing. It’s pretty much a studio apartment, but it’s only for him, anyway. I, for one, would say it’s been a nice living space to see so far, however, I’m just here for support, and by no means trying to influence his opinion. Besides, he still has 2 more scheduled tours after this one, none of which until next week, so he’s keeping all of his options close together.

“And if you’ll follow me,” the leasing agent continues, listening to her heels click on the marble floor and down the hallway, “behind this door is the main bedroom.”

When the door pushes all the way open, my jaw could quite literally drop.

“That window is fucking huge,” I whisper, stepping onto the carpet.

“You’re right about that,” Will says, similarly taken aback.

The room itself is big, with a king bed, nightstand tables boarding both sides, a closet, and then, the big elephant in the room, the gigantic ass window. It’s safe to say he’d have to buy more than one pair of floor-length curtains to cover that.

“Quite the view,” the leasing agent pipes up. “Especially at night.”

“Hell, I could see myself living here,” I joke. “Been here for almost three years and it still never fails to amaze me.” I turn around to look at Will. “Think of all the sunlight you’ll get in here!” I exclaim, gesturing to the sun rays reflecting on the carpet.

“I’ll keep it in the back of my mind.”

We’re shown the in-washer and dryer unit, along with the outdoor facilities, like the pool and tennis court, before Will takes the business card with the agent’s contact information and we walk back to his car, which is quite a walk since there was no space on the street.

When we get in, the engine turns over and I hear him exhale the loudest of sighs.

I turn my head in his direction. “Overwhelmed already?”

He looks at me. “I didn’t like it.”

I raise my eyebrows. “What? Why not?”

“I don’t know.” He fiddles with his beanie. “Not really my style.”

My eyes roll to the back of my head as we pull out of the parking lot across from the complex. “Is it, like, a space factor, or you just think it’s ugly?”

“I don’t think it’s ugly, per se, but I just wasn’t a fan.”

“So you wouldn’t be upset if I ended up renting it?”

Will’s eyes divert from the road before returning his gaze. “Wait, like, actually?”

“No, you bozo. I already have a condo.”

“That’s right, that’s right,” Will digresses. “Sorry. You’ve just been at the apartment for so long that I forgot you had a place of your own.”

Me too.

“Maybe we can stop by and you can give me a tour,” he suggests.

“Like, right now?”

“Unless you have anything better to do.”

I really don’t.

Instead, I nod, taking his phone and opening Maps, typing in the address. “Let’s do it.”

Around half an hour later, because, you know, city traffic and all, we’re standing in front of my door as I fumble with the keys, having the immediate realization that I still have the condo key attached on my lanyard, along with the ones belonging to the apartment and my car. I could’ve sworn I stored it away in a drawer or something.

Inserting the key into the lock, I swing the door open and both of us step up into the entrance, shuffling around the other as I shut the door behind me. “Voila.”

Will looks around, as if he’s totally engaged in the sights. Nothing has moved, nor changed since I was last here, which was over a month ago. Now that I think about it, the reality is kind of pathetic.

“Nice place,” he remarks. His footsteps continue moving forward past the TV and halting near the bathroom.

“It really is.”

“This is the kinda space I need. I mean, this is, like, what? A thousand square feet?”

I shrug. “I don’t know the actual estimates, but yeah, probably around there.”

He scans the couch, the carpet, the kitchen counter, the microwave, and finally turns the corner to look in the bathroom. “How do you not feel claustrophobic in here?” I hear him call out.

“Because it’s just me,” I answer back.

His face re-emerges. “Wayyy too small.”

“Oh, you need a bathroom the size of a mansion?”

“Sure. Gotta get that superstar look somehow.”

Rolling my eyes, I go to join Will, looking into my own bathroom for the first time, and I mean really looking at it since that night.

“I remember getting ready in here,” I say aloud, “for dinner.”

He doesn’t say anything.

“Curling my hair, putting on my dress.” I sigh. “Anxiously waiting to be picked up.”

Still nothing.

“The last memory I had in here was a good one.” I shuffle behind him and walk into the doorway of my room. “Oh, how times have changed.”

I stand over toward my closet as I watch Will slowly enter, looking like a lost puppy. “Yeah, this is definitely a decent sized bedroom, too.”

“But I thought you wanted fancy shmancy richey shit,” I sarcastically whine.

He breaks out into a grin. “I’ve really failed if you’ve come up with the assumption that I have a self-entitled ego.”

“No, it’s just fun to push your buttons.” I smile back to prove I’m not lying.

I watch him walk over to the window and push the curtains aside, letting the sun pour through. “It’s a nice view.”

A puff of air slips between my teeth. “A very scenic one.” I walk over to stand next to him, pointing to the trees in the distance.

Will laughs. “And yet, there are no leaves.”

“Welcome to winter in New York. That’s why spring’s my favorite.”

“Not just because it’s your birthday?”

I shake my head. “No. Weather gets nicer, the sun’s out longer…” 

“And?”

“Would’ve been three years.”

That eerie silence infiltrates again.

“Abb, I am-”

“So sorry, yeah, yeah, blah blah blah.” I cut him off. “God. It’s crazy how time flies like that.”

“But you know what?” Will suggests. “There’s so much to look forward to this year.”

“Oh, really?” 

“Yep. There’s the rest of the season, Legoland…”

I can’t help but laugh.

“Toronto in a few days, my birthday, your birthday, Jim’s birthday.”

“As long as I don’t ruin it again.”

“You won’t.”

I let out a groan. “I hope so.”

“Maybe…signing a new contract?”

I give him a dumbfounded look. “Trying to pressure me, I see.”

“By no means at all.”

My concentration is on the bare trees. “I don’t know.”

“Abb,” he says somewhat seriously, “no one else is gonna mediate with me and Jimmy the way you have.”

“Hey, that’s not even my issue to fix,” I defend. “Whatever problems you have with each other have to be worked out between the both of you. I’m not picking sides.”

“And I would never expect you to, but it’s just stupid.”

“Which is why it needs to be talked about!” I roll my eyes. “But not now. You guys are my friends. I can’t make arguments saying that you’re each amazing and this and that because it’s all a bunch of crap. Grow up and hash it out, or maybe I will be the one that leaves.”

“Yeah!” Will exclaims. “Don’t even think of doing that.”

I walk back across the carpet and stop in the doorframe. “You’d see how easily provoked I can get.”

The sound of curtains shutting rings through my ears as I stand near the couch, waiting for Will to come out of my room. His keys escape the pocket of his coat, glancing around at everything one last time. “Ready?”

That word alone has me hightailing out the door, turning off the lights and securing the locks before we walk across the parking lot and back into the car.

When we’re finally on the road, Will breaks the quick moment of silence first. “I was only nagging you about the space because I just wanted to see how much extra I would have with the extra bedroom.”

I blink, then turn in my seat to look at him, eyes still remaining on the road. “Wait. You were actually serious about that?”

“I thought I made it perfectly clear. Anytime you get sick of him, between now and perhaps forever, or whatever! Even if you need to just get out of your own place.” The car stops at a red light and he shifts to look my way. “You can come stay with me.”

“I-”

“You don’t even need to tell him. Just come over.”

“I can’t do that.”

The car starts moving again. “And why’s that?”

Because it’ll only be a repeat of what I’m currently enduring.

“I’m just afraid of repeating the past.”

“What are you afraid of repeating?”

Leaning my head against the seat, I look up at the top of the windshield. “That night.” 

Taking a breath, I continue. “And everything else.”

We slowly enter back into Manhattan. Few words were exchanged after my ‘confession.’ I cannot make that decision again. If someone offers me to stay with them, even if they claim I won’t be imposing, and we’ll “work it out,” I won’t be doing it. I’ll deal with it all on my own. The last thing I want people thinking is “Hey! Look what the cat dragged in. Again!”

Will pulls up to the front of the entrance to drop me off. I unbuckle my seatbelt and have my hand on the door handle before he locks me in.

I turn around. “Hey, c’mon.”

“What’s the rush?” He drags out. 

I tap my fingers on the lock/unlock switch.

“So Vinny and I are gonna pick you up here, he’ll drop us off at the airport, and then we’ll board, fly in, and my parents will drive us back to the house. Just warning you right now they are very, very chatty.”

“Oh, great,” I say sarcastically.

“But they’re so excited to meet you, so just let them bombard you with questions, okay?”

I nod. “K.”

“And same thing, well, I guess, for when we leave. They’ll drop us off at the airport, we’ll fly back here, and Vinny will pick us up, drop you off back here.”

“Sounds like you already got it all planned out.”

“I do.” He adjusts the rim of his hat. “Is Jim going anywhere during break?”

I make an uncertain face. “He said he was thinking of going home, but I’m not sure yet. That’s why I wanna get back to figure out what the deal is.”

Will holds down on the unlock button, smiling. “You should’ve just told me that first. Go.”

I smile back. “Why, thank you.”

“No, thank you for coming with. It’s nice to not do these sort of things alone.”

“Yeah.”

Another bit of silence. 

I clear my throat. “Well, uh, I’ll see you.”

“We’ll let you know when we’re leaving to come get you, okay?”

“You got it. Bye.”

“Bye, future roomie.”

I stamp my foot. “God, shut up,” I mutter under my breath, and shut the door. I can hear him laughing before driving off.

When I get back inside, I take the elevator up to the top floor and get out, putting my key in the lock and turning it, letting the door move to the side as I step back into the apartment. The sound of the TV, for whatever reason, caused me to slightly jump, and as I shut the door and lock it, I remember that another person, who has the lease in his name, lives here too. In fact, he’s not even on the couch where I pictured him. He’s by the counter, coffee pot in hand. His eyebrows draw together. “Uh…hi.”

My head tilts. “Hi?”

“Where you been?”

“Just out.” I slide off my sneakers and then my coat, hanging it up on the hook by the door.

“I see.”

I scoff. “You okay?”

Jimmy rubs his hand over his eye. “Yeah. Just uh, just got up.”

I look toward the cable box. “It’s 11:30.”

“And it’s also a Saturday.”

I click my tongue. “Okay, fair.”

“Want a cup?” 

“I’m good, thanks.”

He comes from around the counter and moves to stand in front of me. “You weren’t here when I got up.”

“I told you,” I reiterate. “I was out.”

“And you didn’t come back with bagels?”

I just stand there.

His chapped lips break into a smile. “Relax, I’m just messing with you.”

I laugh to validate his attempt.

“So, listen.” He moves to sit down on the couch, placing his cup on the table. “I’m just letting you know about break, and, uh, that I’m gonna be going to Boston.”

Pretending to be surprised (which I’m not. In fact, I’m more relieved), it’s time to question him. “Well, good. You need a break.”

“It’s the only time I’ll really be getting one, anyway.” 

“How long are you gonna be gone for?”

“The whole week. I’ll drive back next Sunday.”

“And when are you planning on getting there?”

“I’m leaving tomorrow afternoon.”

My head decides on a slight nod. “Oh.”

“But hey. You’ll have this whole place to yourself for an entire week.”

Technically only four and a half days, but he doesn’t need to know that.

“Oh, you bet I’m excited,” I tell Jimmy. “Aren’t you excited?”

“Very.” His lips enclose around the rim of his cup.

“And I’m sure your dad will be thrilled that I’m not there? Tell him I can hold my own now.”

He scoffs. “How about I don’t mention you the whole trip?”

“That’s only if he doesn’t ask, which he definitely will.”

“To hell with that.”

I continue lingering by the door. “Need help packing?”

“No, I’m not bringing too much anyway.”

Typical male response.

I sniff, pretending to start crying. “How am I gonna survive without you?”

He turns around. “Oh, chill out, Abb. It’s one week, not forever. You’ll see me walk back through that very door.”

“I will?”

“Yeah.”

We’ll wait and see on that one.

And to distract myself from the 0.1% chance of that actual reality occurring, I finally find myself walking toward the couch and sitting down next to him, inhaling the warm aroma of his coffee.

A new version of ourselves always develops after walking through here.

The early morning hours of March 21st, post-funeral, Jimmy’s birthday, Martha’s Vineyard, Halloween, Christmas dinner.

I might not recognize him when he comes back.

He’ll be alone.

And I’ll be surrounded by all of those haunting versions of him, wondering how the next one will be worse than the last.

Because that’s how it always ends up.