#(note: i do not know if he hasnt seen his sister in years)

[perenlop]

i’m very off and on about whether or not i wanna go through with pokemon protagonist headcanons bc i have weird ideas but never really feel like drawing them out bc i dislike drawing humans. but gen 5 thoughts are tempting me...

[babybottlepop96]

Kyo Sohma x Reader (Fluff)

Warning: uh... None?

A/n: I think was absolutely cute. Low-key kinda proud of this one!

"T-Tohru?" You asked the brunette girl standing about five feet away from you. She was accompanied by two very attractive young men, one with silver hair and one with orange hair. She turned to where you were and her eyes widened.

"(Y/n)? Is… is that really you?!" You nodded and you two ran towards each other, your (h/l) (h/c) hair flowing behind you. You two collided in a hug and you stayed like that, silently crying into each other's shoulders.

"Miss Honda? Who is this?" The silver haired male asked behind you and Tohru.

"Oh! Yuki! This is my sister!" She smiled brightly.

"You have a sister?!" The orange haired male practically yelled and it made you frown slightly.

"Calm down you dumb cat. No need to yell, we are right here." Yuki spoke coolly.

"Shut up stupid rat!" The ginger yelled again.

"Oh! It's okay Kyo! No one really knows!" Tohru smiled nervously.

"Why's that? She got something wrong with her?" Kyo asked a bit rudely and you frowned even further.

"Do you ever know when to shut up?" Yuki responded, irritation laced in his words.

"What? If no one really knows about her there has to be something wrong with her! No one would just want to keep their child a secret!" Tears started to prick the corners of your eyes. He didn't even know you! How could he just say that?!

"You don't even know me, you pathetic excuse for a human being." Anger and sadness are very evident in your voice. "You have no right to say anything about me, even if it's just an assumption. No one knew about me because I was given up for an open adoption. Our mother didn't make enough money to keep both of us and decided an open adoption was best for everyone. We still got to see each other and spend time together. That's why no one really knows about me, you asshat!" You shouted at the ginger male.

"HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW THAT?! YOU DIDN'T SAY ANYTHING!"

"YOU NEVER ASKED NOR GAVE ME A CHANCE TO EVEN SAY IT!" You shouted right back.

"I'm sorry for his ignorance miss….."

"(L/n), (y/n) (l/n). It's a pleasure to meet you Yuki." You said and then bowed. "And it's quite alright. It's not like you're the reason he has no filter." You spoke towards Kyo that time and the anger in his eyes was showing. "Next time you want to say something about someone, make sure you have the facts first." After that you ignored Kyo every chance you got. But now being at the same school as your sister, you tended to spend a lot of time at the Sohma household. Even Shigure had taken a liking to you, I mean… what young school girl HASNT he taken a liking too. But you were different, you tending to flirt back with Shigure, who in return, would usually just go back to his room because he had no idea what the fuck to do with that. He never had someone down right flirt back before and he was a bit awkward about it.

"I've never seen Shigure retreat to his room so quickly before." Yuki spoke surprised.

"Has anyone ever flirted back with him?" You asked as you ate the rice balls your sister made.

"No."

"Well then that's why, the poor old man probably hasn't got a good lay in years and now doesn't know how to respond to someone flirting back." You said nonchalantly which caused the others to spit out their food. "What?"

"That's fucking gross, (y/n)!" Kyo yelled.

"Don't listen then gingy." He rolled his eyes and that's when you two got into another argument. By the time you both cooled down you realized that everyone had left the house. They just…. Left. You groaned as kyo walked towards you.

"What wrong now?"

"Nothing.. just everyone left when they said they would go to the park with me." You pouted. Kyo couldn't help but let a small smile slip into his face.

"The park?"

"Yes! I wanted to swing on the swing set and go down the slide. Maybe play tag or hide and seek."

"Doesn't that sound a bit… childish?"

"So?! It's fun!" You argued, making Kyo pinch the bridge of his nose in annoyance.

"I'll go with you if it'll make you stop pouting." You instantly smiled. You didn't care if it was Kyo, the boy you may have hated but also had a stupid crush on, you had someone to go to the park with you.

"Yay! Let's go!" You grabbed your hands and ran towards the door to put your shoes. You dragged him out the door and all the way to the park, hand in hand. Kyo couldn't help the small blush that crept onto his face as he looked at your connected hands. Fingers laced together. It just felt… right to Kyo. He would never admit out loud that he liked you. Your personality, the way you were proud of who you were and the things you did, the way your eyes sparkled when you talk about your favorite food or the way you could hold your own against him. The way you would get angry when he beat you while sparring, knowing you weren't trained like him but still went against him anyway. He shook his head and cleared his mind when you two came to a stop.

"So, what do you want to do first?" He asked while putting his hands in his pockets.

"Let's see you can swing the highest!" You smiled and ran towards the swing set. Another small smile made it ways to his face as he watched you get excited about swings. You waited for him and smiled when he sat next to you. "Okay, the first one to reach the top bar wins!"

"What do I get if I win?" He asked.

"Anything you want! And if I win, anything I want!" You smirked, you were the best damn swinger in the world. You got this in the bag.

"Deal."

~~~

"I JUST DON'T UNDERSTAND! HOW THE FUCK DID YOU WIN!?" You yelled once you reached the Sohma household after hours of swinging rematches.

"Long legs short stack." He chuckled as you pouted. You two entered the house and it was still empty. "They went out for dinner." Kyo said, coming next to you with a note written in Tohru's handwriting.

"Oh.. okay then. Want me to make something for dinner?" You asked as you made your way into the kitchen.

"Sure." Kyo shrugged and followed you. "So, I thought of what I wanted for winning." He said nervously.

"And?"

"Kiss me." He whispered, if he wasn't standing directly behind you, his mouth right next to your ear, you would've never heard him. You slowly turned to look him in the face.

"What?" You couldn't believe he said that. You had to have been dreaming! There was no way in Hell that Kyo Sohma would ask you to kiss him.

"Kiss me." He repeated himself. You didn't even have time to think as your face moved closer to his own. The two of you locked lips and butterflies immediately began to warm your tummy. It was perfect.

He pulled you closer, bodies flush against one another. Your arms around his neck and his around your waist. That's when his eyes shot open and he pushed back a bit. He saw the look of hurt in your eyes and felt awful. He looked at himself, awe stricken. He hadn't transformed. He was still human. He looked back at you who now had a look of confusion written on your face. He smiled and pulled you closer to him, crashing his lips against yours. It was filled with passion and love and need and hunger. Once you two pulled away, breathing heavily, you asked. "What was that push about?" He pecked your lips again.

"I'll explain some other time. Right now, I just want to hold you, okay? Please?" You didn't hesitate to bid your head yes. You spent the rest of the time cuddling on the couch. When the others came home, they found the two of you cuddled on the couch sleeping peacefully.

"He didn't turn?" A surprised Yuki asked.

"I guess he found his one true soulmate." Shigure shrugged and smiled. "Too bad too, I was ready to finally flirt back with her." Yuki then slapped him upside the head.

"I'm so glad they are happy together." Tohru smiled and placed a light green blanket over the two of you. "Goodnight sis, night Kyo. Sleep peacefully." Everyone went to their separate rooms and went to bed. The next day you awoke alone on the couch. You entered the kitchen.

"So, care to explain why you pushed me away last night, Kyo?" Everyone looked at the two of you and sighed. Kyo then began the story of the zodiac and your eyes widened. "WHAT?! NO WAY! TOHRU, HUG HIM I WANNA SEE KITTY KYO!" Suddenly Kyo ran and you chased him.

"Well, I think they are a perfect couple." Yuki smirked.

[ivyuns]

landing in my heart: closer

genre: angst, slight fluff

word count: 2.3k

warnings: location is in north korea, jealousy, guns, car crashes, kinda rushed lol

part three of landing in my heart

landing in my heart information

“what did you just say?”

“i would appreciate if you put the gun away from my fiancee”

“she belongs to division 11. and for those who doesnt know, shes unable to release her personal information. now if you mind, my fiancee is exhausted from her recent mission she came back from” jisung told everybody. on point, your body falls onto jisung’s shoulders, acting as if you were actually exhausted.

jisung takes you to his property till you two are out of sight until jisung clears his throat. “you can let go now” without hesitation, you let go and immediately asks whats division 11 is all about. telling you everything, you enter the house with jisung trailing behind you.

jisung takes you to his property till you two are out of sight until jisung clears his throat. “you can let go now” without hesitation, you let go and immediately asks whats division 11 is all about. telling you everything, you enter the house with jisung trailing behind you.

jisung offers you a cup of water and telling you to drink it to calm down. you gladly accept it as he takes a deep breath. “house inspections happens randomly, but i didnt expect it to happen today. im sorry”

“well, im sure you were equally surprised by it too, so no worries. and you showed up on perfect timing too” you smiled at him, drinking the water then looking around. “by the way, are you hurt? are you okay?” jisung asks while hes checking up on you for any hurt wounds. looking up and making eye contact, you see how his eyes were full of worry. shaking you head a no, you smile at him and was distrubed by knocks on jisungs gates.

“captain han! are you there?!”

jisung goes to open the door and sees the village women, who had heard about the news about you and offers him food. feeling like he couldnt hold any plates, they offer him to help him and take it into the house until you appear behind him.

“o-oh! nice to meet you, captain han’s fiancee” one of the women says. greeting them back, you grab one of the plate full of food from jisung. before you two could go, they ask you where your last mission was, what was it about and how was it. expecting to answer all their questions, you replied as “im sorry, i cant have my information out there”. the women gasp, shocked at they way you talked to them.

jisung tells them to go home and have a good night. doing what theyre told, they walked away and you close the gate. “is captain han really in love with her?” “is this a one-sided love?” “look at her hair, it looks so messy!” hearing all the comments they made about you made you stop your tracks, as long as jisung. gritting you teeth in annoyance, you two continued to go inside the house and ate the food they made for you two.

as you two got ready for bed, jisung made you sleep in the living room as he slept in his room. talking though the closed door, you asked him if he ever went to switzerland. “sorry if im being nosy. but i saw piano sheets and an application form from switzerland. did you have a girlfriend that you would play the piano to?” with no response from him, you drifted to sleep.

after the years go by, yiseo is back in pyongyang. passing the gates, yiseo bumps into minseok, who smiles at her and lets her go first. yiseo smiles back and proceeds until she sees her uncle, myeongseok. “ah, look at my yiseo. you lost a lot of weight during your studies in russia.”

“damn, its always the north korean women who have the best taste” minseok tells himself, but as his bodyguard hears him, he tells them to be careful of what he says. minseok then tells him he will pay him an extra 10,000 won if hed stop nagging him, but hell pay minseok 10,000 won if he nags to him again.

as yiseo and myeongseok stops at their car outside the airport, she realized what happened to the other car. “uncle, wheres the other car?” she asks. “oh, i had to lend it to jisung” “are you going to pick it up or is he bringing it back here” “im sure i can go there and pick it up after my recital tomorrow” “huh?! are you sure? i didnt even mention you were coming back to him because he never asks about you” “what kind of woman doesnt remember her fiance?”

the coal mine.

cheolgang enters the coal mine and enters the wire-trapper room after greeting his soldiers. the soldiers gets up from their seats and salutes cheolgang. “ive seen you all work hard, thank you”. manbok hears cheolgang and immediately salutes him. cheolgang tells manbok to follow him into the back exit.

“sir, what brings you all the way here?” manbok asks. “ri muyeok’s brother is now in the outpost. so i need you to wire his house. theres a women in there and im using it to ruin his family” as cheolgang finishes. manbok gets flashbacks about jisung’s brother.

7 years ago.

“you see, my little brother is studying in switzerland right now” muyeok says in the car with another soldier. “mmhm, hes a piano genius with a full scholarship. but everytime i call him, hes always sorry. maybe its because one of us had to follow our dads path” muyeok replies. “did you wanted to be on the piano path?” “nah, i wasnt into it as jisung was so i took this path” the soldier nods his head. “but he told me when he gets back, he’ll play a song for me, so im excited for that. i bet itll put me in a happy mood”

manbok, who listens to their conversation, helping cheolgang with his favor; killing muhyeok. telling where the driver to go, they collied with muyeoks vehicle. hearing the crashing noises made manbok go numb.

everyones outside the village, looking though jisung’s car, full of excitement. eavesdropping from the gate, jisung comes behind you and tells you hes leaving. “wait let me walk you out. so those women can see what i actually look like since it was dark outside” “no, theres no time for that. also, here. tie it up” jisung gives you a handkerchief. “tie what up?” jisung turns you around and ties your hair up, securing it with a double knot.

heading out of the gate together, you pretended to play the good wife and walked jisung out of the house. before he could leave your sight, you grabbed his wrist and told him to pat you hair, as if you two were being real about your engagement. he then pats your house as everyone is disgusted at your actions. you then tell him to wave at you in which he did. waving at him back, he turns around and heads to the base, bowing at people.

the village women from last night shows up to jisungs house after bad talking about you, inviting for a kimchi battle, you refuse.

back at the base, all soldiers are in an array. “hwang hyunjin, lee felix, kim seungmin, and yang jeongin. all of you but the four of you, head to the shooting range”

with everyone gone but the five of them, they meeting in jisung’s office. “so what did you tell them” hyunjin asks. “i told them shes my fiancee” everyone gasp loudly. “guys just be quiet right now. we just need a plan for her to get back on the boat”

as the four men walk to jisungs house as jisung himself goes to where the accident happened. as he talks to the soldier that was the guard for the place couldnt see what exactly happened since it was dark but he took note on how empty the cargo was and how the front the truck had armor. a very sharp armor.

in south korea, sehyeong calls the people who are helping him track down minseok, telling them to go to the places where he think hes hiding at. at the family meeting, both sehyeong and sejun continue to fight over who would be the next heir. sanga recommends the la vie en rose should be over if your disappearance is longer than expected.

in the village, you can see how hard life is as a north korean. telling the boys that youre off into the house to get potatoes, you noticed a little boy stealing one of the jackets. as the boys saw, they quickly ran towards the little boy and manages to stop him, as a bag of rice falls off of his pocket. “let me go! i need to feed my sister who hasnt eaten in 3 days and because of that, she cant open her eyes!”

making everyone come back to the house, you grabbed food from the cupboards as hyunjin is speaking nonsense. “you really act like this is your own house. youre giving away food thats not even yours to some boy whos lying” after putting the food into a tote bag, as well as a small blanket, youre stopped as you see jisung. “captain han! hes faking it!” hyunjin yells out. “no im not!”

“shut up hyunjin” you shut him up. jisung tells the little boy to wash his face and hands before eating so that he can prevent getting sick. after he washes he face and hands, he runs towards his little sister, who is sleeping alone under cardboard and a small sheet covering it. finally happy to feed his sister.

after that is finished, everyone gathers around and spends time with you before you leave tonight. “okay everyone! today i will give you awards to claim once we meet again” “awards!? are you a general or something?-” “and the first award goes to yang jeongin !” you say as you cut off hyunjin. “now you have two choices. you can use your prize as we see each other again or get it now. when we meet, youll get 100 million won, or get 8 corn now” “ill get the corn!”

“second prize goes to lee felix! your prize when we meet again is have lunch with jiwoo or get the tv right there” you pointed to jisungs tv. “look-” “dont worry, hell pick the first one” you whisper back to jisung. “ill pick the first one” felix gets up and claims his award.

“third one goes to the most handsome is ... kim seungmin!” jisung looks at you with disbelief. “you can have a blind date with miss korea or any award youd like” “ill choose none” nodding you head, you agreed seungmin is like the boys in south korea.

“okay thats all-” “wait what about me” hyunjin asks. “seriously? fine here, have this shampoo, conditioner, and bodywash” as you threw him the bag full of the products jisung got you earlier. “what the- captain han you really bought her this?!” “she said it was essentials”

after announcing the awards and coming to the end, jisung gets up as jealousy is on him, and goes out of the house. following him behind, you take him to your thank you gift for him; tomatoes after giving the seller half of jisungs potato sack since you didnt have any money. however, jisungs not impressed since he doesnt like tomatoes and doesnt properly treat it well. “whatever, just water it and say 10 nice things to it”

the night comes and everything leads to the end. the 4 men are back, eating corn on the mountain near the base with the moon shinning on them. “i feel sad now” jeongin speaks, stopping the silence. “after all the complications, its now the end”

you and jisung go inside the car jisung borrowed from myeonseok. heading to the dock where youre finally going home. taking off the handkerchief jisung gave you for you hair and folding it, you put it in the middle. “thank you for everything. i mean it” you told him. “we wont see each other again, right?” “probably” jisung answers. “its such a shame that you live here.” “its a shame that you live there” you chuckled at his joke, creating silence in the car once again.

parking the car near the deck, felix’s dad comes out of his boat as you two walk out. giving him the ticket, he asks if its just you. “no, the two of us. ill return after she is on the other boat” jisung says as you widen your eyes at him.

going onto the boat and sailing into the middle of the ocean. “since we probably wont see each other again, my name is yoon y/n” jisung looks at you with sincere eyes. “my name is han jisung” jisung smiles.

“ah, im a member of the haeju yoon clan. haeju is in north korea right?” “im a member of hanju han clan” “the irony!” both of you laugh, making jisung feeling happy after a while.

suddenly, a flash a light flashed the boat. “stop the boat!” yelled the other boat who was trailing behind felix’s dads boat. you and jisung hid under the boat as the boat was stopped. the police were investigating the boat. “were here to see your honesty and see if youre trading goods or smuggling humans to other countries” “why would i do that?” the police stomps on the blue hallow board, which was where you and jisung were hiding.

“open up!” was what you both heard underneath. “jisung! what do we do?! youre a soldier you should know what to do. geez” you silently yelled out. “in south korean dramas-” “what?! this is no time to talk about this” you freaked out. “im going to do something. now look at me and dont be startled. look at me and nothing else”

with that, jisung slams his lips into yours as the door opened.

additional ending:

after you leave jisung alone with the tomato plant, jisung bends down and tells 10 nice words.

“sunshine, happiness, rose, friends, breeze, cheekies, family, flowers, love, and piano”

[dizzyingflicker]

frigid air (fic commentary)

literally no one asked for this but hello! hi! if you didn’t know, i wrote a 11 chapter fic called ‘frigid air’ a few weeks back. the fic started as jayhoon centric, but it kinda got off the rails from there hehe

the birth of the idea

so the bri from a few weeks ago was already thinking about writing a lengthy enha au. 

i just finished writing a jakehoon one shot and wanted to try my hand at writing another ship! at first, i thought of typical au ideas that were college themed. those are the most fun to write and read imo, bc it’s so grounded in reality. and also bc the jakehoon one shot i wrote was a lot heavier and angsty, which was something i think i’m better at doing! there’s this really great fic i read that inspired me to try my hand at some lighter themes! 

after reading that au, i was like “hmmmm im gonna try writing some romcom type of stuff.” i always ALWAYS write angst, so this was a really nice and fun change! 

yes, back to the college au ideas. i then began to think about what majors the enha kids would do if they went to college. my notes for the first outline kind of went like this: 

Jay - fashion major, new addition to the dorm, is rich but doesnt want anyone to know, is kind despite being taken advantage of in his hometown, just wants a normal family 

Heeseung - music production major, has a soundcloud lowkey but doesn't let anyone know, is going thru his first real heartbreak and is using music to deal with it 

Jungwon - hasnt decided on a major, came to uni w a full ride taekwondo scholarship, secret boyfriend, coming to terms w sexuality 

Jake - australian exchange student, architecture major, maybe gets a weird stalker? 

Sunoo - beauty school, wants to be a hairstylist, kinda eccentric, knows everyone’s business

Sunghoon - figure skater, doesnt go to school, is close to getting on the national team, lives in a dorm to avoid his tiger parents, softspot for his younger sister

Niki - dance major from japan, is a little too clingy, feels lonely away from his family 

in hindsight, the characters here seem a lot more deeper and fleshed out as compared to what i ended up writing, but i realized that if i kept all of this in - it would’ve been really overwhelming for the reader. i had to remind myself that this was a jayhoon centric fic LMAOOOOO 

after writing this, i was like “WAITTTT A HOT SEC” this sounds a lot like hello my twenties! which btw, is an amazing show on netflix that you should definitely watch. i watched this show with my girlfriend and man, the way it handled all of the a,b,c, etc plots was so fantastic. 

every character had their own stories and that’s what i loved. usually in fics or aus, a lot of the side characters sort of fade into the background. they also do this thing where their main reason for existence is to lift the mc or main ship up in the story. i wanted to avoid that, so taking inspo from hello my 20s, i decided to give every character a story. whether it be something big like sunoo’s stalker or something small like heejake’s and jungniel’s development, i wanted to give them all something to tell. in hello my 20s, each of the girs living in that house had their own unique stories that fit them really well. whether i did it as well as the writers of the show - that’s something else to unpack, right? 

the characters and their developments 

so this is something i’m not sure if i did well in or not. the original plot was to have jay and sunghoon not get along at all. with jay’s abrasiveness and sunghoon’s surface coolness, i thought it would be fun to see them butt heads. but i realized that it wasn’t so realistic because they don’t really see each other enough to butt heads that much. i thought making sunghoon shy and reserved (thus standoffish) while jay tries his best to make sunghoon open up was a lot more cuter. 

jay is a lot more bold in this, even through his embarassing moments. he’s self-assured, determined and open to pretty much anything. he’s generous and friendly. the only weakness jay has is he’s too presumptious sometimes and assumes stuff without any real basis, as seen with him assuming that ryujin and sunghoon were dating bc of a passing remark from jake and some yt comments. i gave him a dead dad at the end of the fic bc hello we’re projecting but also to explain why he’s super close to his mum and why he’s just a tad bit behind everyone else his age. i wanted to expand on this a little but sadly, i kinda ran out of words to talk about this. if you know what i mean. tbh, jay doesn’t have much of a development in this. that’s something i really want to improve on in my next au, giving my mc some actual development instead of getting carried away with other side characters. 

sunghoon is, as i said, shy and reserved. he has a lil trauma from being rejected by seon years ago. you can tell that his experience was not pleasant at all - so he keeps feelings of attraction and want farrrrrr away from him. sunghoon is sorry he’s an anti-romantic, if you will. throughout this fic, you see him open up to jay and realize that not every guy he’s attracted to will reject him painfully. he also learns that he doesn’t need to keep people at an arms length away and that opening himself up to more people will bring about very nice things! very cliche but hey, it iz what it iz. 

jungwon was a fun one to write! not bc i feel a little of what he feels, but bc he’s adorable with daniel and having him be unsure was fun to write. jungwon is pretty self-assured in this fic, but with daniel, he’s not really sure what he’s doing. 

heeseung feels secure enough with jake that he’s willing to sing in front of him, which is something he doesn’t do. jake is very naive about relationships and hee’s feelings for him, but heeseung kind of brings him down back to reality with the scene from han river. heeseung is getting over a breakup and that stuff takes a while, so that’s why i didn’t let them get together too fast. hee knows how jake feels about him and he doesn’t want to ruin it by jumping into things so fast. 

sunoo is super friendly and too trusting with people, which is both a blessing and a curse. niki and him have been attached to the hip since their friendship started and niki sees sunoo as a very very dear friend to him. bc who else lets him sleep in his bed and who else buys him taiyaki everyday? that’s right, it’s his sunoo hyung. sunoo also cares for niki a lot and they’re just very sweet. 

what i did well and what i didn’t 

okay this is debatable, but i did like how i wrote the developing relationships in this, mostly the ones that weren’t the main jayhoon arc. i liked the way i wrote jungwon and daniel’s little friction and i loved heejake’s confession scene. 

the humour in this was a little weak for me, but it was my first attempt at writing it so it’s forgivable. 

i just wished i wrote the main relationship better. i feel like it took a while at the beginning and suddenly went from 49 to 27403 real quick. if i were to rewrite it, i’d give them a lot more time to pine as that stage before friends and maybe insert more conflict. 

i’d give jay a stronger conflict other than trying to befriend with sunghoon. his character felt very 1d for me and i didn’t like that. i needed to develop him more tbh LMAOOO 

music! 

anti-romantic by txt

perhaps love by eric nam ft cheeze

love poem by iu 

give love by akmu 

hope ur ok by olivia rodrigo 

only yoou by yand da il 

references for sunghoon’s ice skating 

sunghoon’s white outfit in the youtube video with ryujin 

sunghoon’s black outfit in nationals 

the reference pic jay draws of sunghoon (which seon sees) 

if you read the fic, i’d like to say thank you! i had a lot of fun writing this and seeing everyone’s reactions to the plot twists was super fun hehehehe i genuinely loved doing it even tho it gave me a lot stress! thank u for reading this if u read it too LMAOOOOO 

[freerebelmentality]

The high cost of living

AN:  ***TRIGGER WARNING*** MENTIONS OF DRUG USE AND OVERDOSE. **  Ok may I request a Winchester brothers x sister reader where the reader is depressed harms themselves and feels like she not good enough and is a drug addict like does weed and other drugs drinks to relieve her pain and her brothers found out and are not happy it and the reader just not having it and doesn’t want help and can’t handle being lectured about her brothers so she runs away and overdoses and her brothers find her but in the end her brothers help her in recovery and it fluffy in the end And can the reader age around 16-19 is up too you i hope this is ok for u if not I can change it. Requested by @supernerdycookietrashblr ** I took out the self harm and just stuck with the rest of the request. Sorry if this got way too long but I got carried away and I just really enjoyed writing this. Ideas came and wrote those down. So I hope you all will enjoy this and enjoy reading

************************************************************************

Word Count: 2,762

On the road again, you thought while sitting in the back of the Impala.

Looking out the window, seeing the trees pass by at great speed is when you begin to feel sick.

“Dean, Dean. Pull over, Im going to be sick” you say rather quickly

With one quick stop, Dean pulls over to the side of the road and puts baby in park

“Geez, are you ok? You want some water? Mint? Mouth wash?” Sam asks as he rushes to your side.

“Mouth wash?” you reply while Sam runs back to the car and searches his bag for his mouth wash.

“Feeling a little hungover? Or just sick, sick?” Dean asks as he comes check on you as well

“A little hungover” you lie to Dean while Dean goes back to the car and reaches for a beer.

He decides something a little stronger than beer.

He pulls out his flask and walks back to your side.

Sam notices how incredibly sickly looking you’ve become and begins to worry that you are coming down with something.

You knew you were coming down from your latest high, well more like from you latest fix and you needed another. Fast.

Dean hands you the flask and you greatly take it from his hands and drink the entire thing. The whisky made things a little more tolerable.

“Thanks man, I needed that” you tell him and walk slowly back to the car.

Dean and Sam looked to you and noticed how you were walking. Like as if you were in pain and cold. The weather was warm and a beautiful day really.

“Are you sure youre feeling ok?” Dean asks as soon as he gets into the car

“Yes, step on the gas. I wanna go home already” you irritatingly reply back.

Dean didnt like that, so he did what he was told and stepped on the gas to head back to the bunker.

Finally arriving.

You get out of the car as fast as you could and into the bunker. You ran all the way to your room and found your stash hidden in your room.

You felt as though you werent moving fast enough but you made it to your room.

Dean and Sam looked at you oddly as you ran fast into the bunker.

“What the hell is wrong with her?” Dean asks as he takes the stuff from the car and into the bunker.

“Maybe she needs the bathroom again” Sam replies following Dean.

“Hmm’ is all Dean says and goes to his room to put his things away.

Once you got the needle ready, you sat on the toilet and poked the needle into your favourite vain. You pulled back the syringe to draw blood is when you injected the stuff. Slowly

Once the stuff reached your body is when you started to forget about everything else. Your withdrawals, depression, everything. Numbing out everything perfectly.

Or so you thought.

You came out of your room to look for your brothers to hang out with or just to get them to stay away from your room anyway.

“Are you feeling a lot better?” Dean asks while turning away from his cooking

“Yes, I feel a lot better” you reply way to happy but oh well you replied anyway

“Ok then” Sam says while he adds more notes to the folders in front of him

He has been adding the men of letters archives, well the both of them have been doing that and they thought you were doing the same but you dont remember a thing from your last hunt.

All you thought about was how to get your next fix or even next high. Weed wasnt cutting it anymore ever since getting into the opiates.

Stupid for getting into those. Oh well choices were made and it makes the feelings go away.

As the days go by which weeks go by as well. Dean and Sam begin to notice how incredibly bad you got while hunting, sick, and more sicker.

After the sickness, you would be at your normal self and be the great hunter they knew you to be. But when the sickness came, it was as if they didnt know who you were. Didnt look like you or anything.

“Let me know when she goes out, ok?” Dean asks Sam as he watches you walk to your room

“Uh, ok. Why?” Sam asks not really sure if he wants to know the answer but he is curious to see what Dean is up to.

“I want to look through her room, I want to see if Im right about something. If not then I am going to feel like a complete dick about it later” Dean explains himself as he looks towards the hall.

“Right about what?” Sam asks looking out for you as well

He hears you coming out of your room and walk the hallway and waits for you to appear.

“Hey guys, Im going to head out for a bit and I will be home in an hour or something” you tell them and head out the door.

You didnt give them any time to say anything cause you needed to head out and look for the number one thing you have been needing. You needed your next high. You needed it bad.

“Ok, go” Sam says to Dean as he books it to your room

“What exactly are we looking for?” Sam asks as he digs through your stuf

“Needles or drugs” Dean replies as he sees a box in the bottom of the sink in your bathroom

Dean hoped it wouldn’t be the things he is looking for. Other wise all of you weird behaviour he has noticed for the past couple years would be more understandable now.

He has seen this type of addiction before in fellow hunter friends, their addiction to opiates and how they passed to overdosing.

He opens the box and sees his worst nightmare

“Sam” is all Dean could say and drops the box

Sam rushes to Dean’s side and sees what has fallen to the floor.

All the used needles, cotton balls and spoons. Along with the rubber bands. He also sees the unopened rigs.

“No” Is all Sam can say

He doesnt understand why you would want to inject anything into yourself with poison.

They get out of your roomand wait for you to come back to the bunker.

Dean has a few words for you.

Sam has a few questions for you.

They couldnt believe their baby sister would turn to drugs

Dean is beginning to understand the border line alcoholism but he always thought it was just something to help you sleep. He didnt think it was something to settle the withdrawals.

The next morning, Dean and Sam are still seated in the library waiting for you to walk through the doors. None of them moved from their seats, they stayed seated like that and waited for you. Dean was to heated to even move from his seat.

His anger turned to worry when you never showed. Until now, his nerves settled and now all he wants to do is hug you and lock you away. But he needed to say a few things first before he can do that.

As you come walking down the stairs and see your brothers in the library looking at you all tired looking. You were about to say something when you see a familiar box. Your heart begins to race.

“Morning guys, sorry I didnt come home last night and sorry I didnt call or anything” you say to break the ice but knew you should have said nothing and should have went straight to your room

“Y/n? What the hell is this crap?” Dean asks opening the box and pushing it towards you.

Your heart begins to beat rapidly because your brother has found your dirty secret. Your life long dirty secret.

“You went through my room?” you ask not even going to lie about the box they found.

What was the whole point in lying? They found it, they figured it out and you werent going to lie about it.

It was as if you secretly hoped they would find it, maybe them finding it would finally get you to stop and go to treatment.

“Of course we went through your room. We wanted to know what was making you feel so crappy and during hunts” Sam says next, he finally finds his voice.

“You found my dirty secret. Now what?” you ask as anger begins to form.

“Why? How long? This needs to stop now” Dean replies sternly, he didnt want to get too angry. Otherwise he would have ruined the whole plan he had.

“Or else what?” What are you going to do if I dont stop?”  you ask while looking to both of your brothers

They both went quiet, they didnt want to give any ultimatums cause they feared you would pick the poison over them and they knew you are going to pick that over them.

They wondered what they did wrong to make you turn to something else to numb out everything.

Sure Dean hasnt been the poster boy about opening up his feelings about anything and he feels he should have done that with you. At least.

Sam should have pestered you more about opening up. How he does with Dean, he should have done the same for you. He didnt and he feels ashamed.

“You know, I’ll make things easier for you” you break the silence and walk down the hall and into your room

“What do you mean make things easier for us?” Sam asks as he follows you down the hall

“Where the hell do you think your going?” Dean asks next following behind Sam

You grabbed what you could and what you thought was clean. At least it was warm clothing anything, it was beginning to get a bit nippy out there.

“Im leaving. That way I wont be such a burden to either of you anymore” you reply while walking back down the hall and up the round stairs

“Y/n, no. Stay here and we will help you” Sam pleads with you as he follows

“Y/N!! Stop” Dean raises his voice

“You arent a burden. Stay, so we can figure out how to help you and let us help you” Sam continues as he looks to you.

You are at the top of the stairs and finally with one final thought. You turned the door knob and walked out.

Dean runs up the stairs and tries to block you from going any where but he is too late. He ran out the door and you were gone. He yells for your name, looks around and continues to yell for you.

Nothing, it was as if you disappeared into thin air and he wondered where you went or what direction you took.

“Son of a bitch” Dean says as he looks around with both of hands behind his head.

Tears fill his eyes as a lone tear streams down his face. He falls to his knees, feeling defeated he let this happen. Defeated he let anything go this far and didnt notice anything to begin with.

Sam comes running to him and looks around as well.

“Sam, shes gone. I couldnt catch up to her. I let her go” Dean tries to keep his emotions together. But he releases a sob

“We’ll find her, someone has to see her and security cameras are every where and one of those ust of caught her” Sam says as he helps Dean to his feet.

Months went by, Dean and Sam never stopped searching for you. Drove from town to town, Dean always tracked better when he was on the road. But his leads always went cold. You knew better to go off track cause you knew he would track you.

Finally Dean’s phone begins to ring. He takes out his phone so fast and answered it like his life depended on it. In a way it did.

Dean talks on the phone for a long period of time and Sam is getting anxious. He doesnt what is going on or who is calling.

Finally Dean gets off the phone.

“Well who was that? What did they say? Say anything about y/n?” Sam asks way too quickly

Dean couldnt understand a word he said, all due to the phone call he just got and that shocked him more.

“That was Y/n’s doctor. She was admitted yesterday and he told me that they saved her from an overdose. That its their third time saving her from the overdose. Why they never called the first couple times was because she didnt list any family members as emergency contacts. Sam we got to go. We got to get our baby sister” Dean finally says and begins running to his room to begin packing.

Sam couldnt believe those words came out of Dean’s mouth. More like he couldnt believe you wouldnt add him or Dean as your emergency contact to begin with. Until now.

They drove for hours and hours.

As they stand at your door, they see you laying on your hospital bed, IV in one hand while the nasal cannula is inserted.

Your attention is brought to the door and you couldnt believe your brothers are standing right in front of you.

“Hi” you break the silence as the greeting came out a little raspy and small

Your brothers came further into the room.

Dean is the first one who hugs you.

“Hi, I missed you” as a tear streams down his face

He hold yous a little longer, feeling as though he is going to wake up and realize its all a dream and have to wake up to a bunker without you in it.

“I missed you so much” he says as he holds onto you a little longer and tighter.

He feels as though you were going to dissolve away if he let you go. Again

“What the hell happened?” he asks taking a seat by your bed side

“I chased and ended up here” you simply answer your brother.

Well you felt ashamed by answering him

“Your face” is all Dean could say

He sees the bruises on your face, the dark circles around your eyes and how sunken in your face is. He is thinking as if he is looking at your skull.

“Ooh, I owe money to my dealer and he made an example out of my face. A few times. So to medicate, I chased the high so much, that I practically chased myself in here” you reply to your brother and look around the room

“The only way for us to get you out of here is you go to treatment and get help. Dean and I were talking along the way and thats our ultimatums” Sam says while Dean looks to him in annoyance

Dean wanted some time with you before he sent you to treatment.

“Ok, ok. I will get the help. I will go to treatment, I wanna come home” you tell them as you begin to cry.

Sam is happy and hugs you. Tears stream down his face as a sigh of relief escapes his mouth

“Thats what I want, for you to come home and go get help. We want to be there for you. We love you” Dean says as he hugs you.

He felt relieved he heard those words coming out of your mouth, as if all of his stress has been removed and now he can finally settle his nerves. Kind of.

For them it was an eternity. Dean felt as though he was in hell all over again but this time felt longer.

Sam felt like he was in the cage all over again in trying to look for you. Or he felt as though he didnt have a soul. Having you around was better and you are Sam’s other half just like Dean is his other half.

When all three of you are together, its as though everyone feels complete but when separated, thats when everything crumbles.

You felt like you are getting your family back, after being away from your brothers for so long. Well more like after running from your problems and creating more. You really felt like you are getting them back and earning their trust.

You and your brother hunted like a family again. Better than ever.

[chicagopd2020]

Family Now

Request:Can you do something with yn being pregnant by jay and being kidnapped, when she is found to be injured and going into labor, but at the end of it all is right. with cute ending

Hope you like it this is my first request :)

Jay had been working on a case where this guy had tried to take almost everyone on the team out as a way to get back at Hank for putting his brother in prison for the rest of his life. Hank recieved a note saying "You took my family away from you now I am going to take yours away from you"  Luckily the man hasnt been successful on any of his attempts. Hank had warned them to all be very careful and watch their backs everywhere they went.

All Jay wanted to do was to get home to Y/N just hold her close and just pretend that it was just the two of them, well 3 if you consider their little baby girl in Y/N stomach. Knowing that is what he had to look for eased his nerves just a little bit. Getting out of his truck he couldnt help but to look around and for some reason he had an uneasy feeling in his gut. Yeah it was probably the fact that he was being hunted by a man and they didnt actually know what he looked like.

As he walks up the stairs to their apartment the feeling got so bad that he was in a run to the apartment just so that he could make sure everything was alright. As he got closer to the apartment he seen their door was slightly opened which he knew wasnt right because Y/N always kept the door locked when he wasnt there. So he took out his gun and eased in the door, seeing that their were things strewed around everywhere like there had been a fight broke out. His heart was in his stomach when he seen the blood on the floor. So he did the first thing that came to his mind, he pulled out his phone and called Voight. Luckily he picks up on the first ring

Halstead whats the problem?

Voight, she's gone! It was silent of the phone for what felt like forever but was just a few seconds.

Im on my way, Ill get the rest of the team to head that way as well, you call it in so that we can find this Son of a Bitch.

As Jay hangs up the phone he does exactly as Voight told him to do. Waiting for the team to arrive he just walks around to see if there is anything that was left that would lead them to where he took her.

The team all finally make it to Jay & Y/N apartment,and as the other officers are looking around for fingerprints or anything really. Then one of the officers came walking up to them.

Detective Halstead there was this note left on your kitchen counter and I think that you are going to want to see this. She says while handing him the note. Jay reads the note out loud

The note reads " Hank you took my brother,Ive got your daughter & grandchild. You may want find me before I do something I may regret"

Dammit Hank I know she is your daughter but we are going to have a kid together and if something happens to either of them I will never forgive you!

Hank stood there and let him yell at him because he felt the same way if anything did happen to his daughter and grandaughter he wouldnt be able to live with himself

Y/N POV

This man that kidnapped me he kept saying sorry but said that it was all my dads fault that this was happening. You kept trying to talk to him trying to figure out what you could do to make up for what your dad did but you got nothing from him. The pain in your lower stomach kept coming closer together but you were not due for another couple weeks and in this moment in time is not how you want your babygirl to be born.

Sir,Sir,SIR finally catching his attention. I think that I need to go to the hospital

There is no way in hell that I am taking you to a hospital.

At that very moment your water broke and water went everywhere.

My water just broke and its either you take me to hospital or my baby will be born right here.

Well then it looks like you will be bringing a life into this world in warehouse. Ill be back in a little while.

He must have been so caught up in taking me that he didnt check me to see if I still had my phone and thank god I keep it on silent most of the time because when I finally got to it I had so many missed calls from Jay and my dad. All you wanted to do was cry cause you know Jay is so worried and there isnt anything he can do to help, but right now wasnt the time to cry in between the pain you sent a text to Jay letting him know everything you seen around you thinking that maybe it would help then find out where you are.

Jay POV

Sitting at my desk doing everything that I possibly can to figure out where she is. Where he took her? We have been going non-stop to figure something out. He finally just slammed his hands on his desk and walked to the locker room looking at the pictures that he had in his locker of the love of his life and his soon to be born baby girl

He just lets his head fall in his hands and all he can do it just cry, lets the tears that he has been holding in since noticing that Y/N was taken fall. He hears his phone go off and as he pulls the phone out thinking that it is just another lead that will get them no where, he sees that it is her name and he jumps up. As he reads everything that the message says he runs back into the bullpin and yells for Voight, thinking that maybe he could make some sense out of it. As Hank is reading the message it clicks

I dont think she knows where she is but she is just telling us what she sees or hears, so that we can figure out where she is. She says that she heard a train at least a couple times within a few hours, she knows that its an old warehouse. Windows lined all around the building and out one of the windows she sees the numbers 5142

As he was saying everything Kim was typing it into the computer to see if she could up with anything. Y/N has always been like a little sister to her so she was just as worried as everyone else on the team. Once she typed in the numbers in popped up exactly what they had all been hoping for..

I FOUND SOMETHING!!!! She yells

Everyone makes their way over to her......There is an old abandoned warehouse at 5142 West St and it hasnt been in business for over 15 years

Suit up lets go..Hanks says as he practically in a jog so that he can get his little girl back.

Y/N POV

The pain is just getting worse by the minute but I know that I can hold off because I know by now that they are on their way to get me. If they are not then I dont see me or my little girl making it out of the warehouse alive. She just trys to continue breathing through the pain hoping that your little girl will be stubborn like her daddy and just saying where she is safe right now.

He finally returns, this time he has a woman with him, she comes over and she trys to check you out and see what shape you are in.

Dont you dare touch me! You all but yell

I have to see how you and your baby are

No you dont. I would rather have my baby on my own then with someone helping me that is helping the man that kidnapped me

I am not working with him, he came on the street and I think that I was the first nurse that he seen and told me that his girlfriend was in labor

Well I am in no way his girlfriend, I am his hostage and he is refusing to take me to the hospital. As she finishes that sentence the nurse turns and sees the gun pointed at her head

You help deliver her baby  and then I have no more use for you. Just cant have her dying just yet....

As he finishes that sentence the door is busted in and Chicago PD is surrounding him. He gets down next to you and points the gun at your head

You come any closer and I will kill her

Dad help me....

I am...You wanted me from the start let my littl girl go and get to a hospital and take me, do whatever you have to but just let her go. Once he finishes the sentence Adam tackles the man to the ground and in a flash Jay is by your side

Y/N I am so sorry that this happened

Hey it isnt your fault, but I think that we are going to become parents a few weeks sooner than we expected.

The nurse finally speaks, We need an gurney in here we have to get her to the hospital. She helps them get you in the ambulance, She gives them all the information that they need and then the ambulance is off to Med. As you arrive everyone is there waiting, you already have a room waiting and everything. After what seems like hours of labor you finally delivered a beautiful blue eyed baby girl. 7lbs 12oz 17in long

After a few hours of resting you ask Jay to get a wheelchair so that you could take her out to meet everyone. As he helped you to the wheelchair he placed the pillow on your stomach before picking up yalls little girl kissing her on the nose before handing her to you. Little moments like that make you falls in love with that man more and more..

As you make your way down the hall the first two people that you see are your dad and Jay's brother Will. They see you making your way down the hall and have huge grins on their faces and rush to their feet.

Hey everyone

How are you doing? Hank ask

feel a little rough but this little one right here makes it all worth it.

What do I have the pleasure of calling my little niece here?

You look up at Jay and you both share a smile

Everyone we would like to introduce you to Camille Justine Halstead. After my beautiful mother and brother who both were taken way too soon.. As you make eye contact with your dad for the first in a very very long time you seen your dad crying. He walks over and kisses you on the head..

That name is perfect.

Well then I guess you better thank Jay because it was his idea

He turns to Jay and pulls him into a hug and whispers thank you. They pull back from the hug and Jay looks him dead in the eye and says We are family now

[like-rain-or-confetti]

Like a Ghost (Ticci Toby x Reader)

You hated the house. Was it the house’s history that made it seem so evil? You didn’t know, but you didn’t want to know. Yet you were being forced to. 

The Roger’s family had a very dark end. Lyra Rogers died in a car accident and their family seemed to decline from there. Her brother, Toby Rogers really struggled after his sisters accident. He lost it after a while, butchering his father and setting the house on fire. The fire damage was mostly repaired except for one room but it only fixed the appearance- not the problems. 

Mrs Roger’s was the only one left, she decided to sell the house, haunted by the memories of her deceased daughter, husband and now missing son. You often imagined that she wanted the perfect family life, and it broke her to not have gotten it. Of course because of its history, the house was sold for next to nothing. Your mother took it, your family’s situation had been on a constant decline for years. To put it simply, your family was pretty desperate and this house was the only option left. It wasn’t until your mother bought the house that you heard more about the Roger’s family. 

Mr Rogers was an alcoholic and abusive. Mrs Rogers was a meek woman who did everything she could to keep her family afloat. Lyra was a nice enough girl who got decent grades. She often protected her brother Toby. Toby was troubled. He had many disorders, the most striking being his Tourette syndrome as well as a disorder that didn’t allow him to feel pain. He was bullied a lot throughout his life and without Lyra, his outlook on life completely disintegrated. ‘Ticci-Toby’ is what the kids in school called him. Whilst the story of a kid being bullied is as old as time at this rate, you had your own theories about Toby. The most important being that Toby was dead. He had to be. He ran into the woods and was never seen again. You were willing to bet he died from exposure and his body was never found. Despite your skepticism, that didn’t make the house any less uncomfortable. From the moment you stepped in there it didn’t feel like your house. You hated the house, and if you let your imagination wander, you were pretty certain that the house hated you too. It felt like you had crossed paths with something you were never supposed to and now that you had, it was the biggest mistake you could have ever made. As though the universe just had to sweeten the deal, you had chosen the room that used to be Toby’s. Lyra’s old room was smaller and still wasn’t entirely fixed. The floor needed redone and whilst the house was mostly safe, that room had some issues. So your mother insisted that room was off limits. 

You opened the door to your ‘new’ room, the door creaking slightly. You scoffed to yourself, creaking doors- it built character for the house. Mrs Rogers was evidently eager to get out of the place since the walls were painted a deep blue. Stereotypical boys room. You noticed Toby’s bed, wardrobe and desk still remained. It wasn’t great, it was actually pretty weird but it’d do. 

The memories of your family were to go to one particular place. Your mother insisted on the attic but it didn’t take much to know who would be going up there. It took some time for you to maneuver the box and climb the ladder once you did, your stomach dropped. Mrs Rogers had been more eager than you had thought. Toby’s things as well as Lyra’s had been stashed in the attic, within their own boxes. Some light digging informed you that it was Toby’s clothes, school work, comics. Really everything a boy would have. 

You pulled out a notepad. Among school notes was scribbles and scrawling of notes that had nothing to do with the work. As you skimmed through the pad, nearing the end, every couple of pages was interrupted with alarming doodles and messages.  ‘HE’S BACK!’  ‘NO EYES!’ These messages scattered the page with stick figures.  ‘HE’S IN MY HEAD!’ You slammed the book shut. You weren’t doing this. The kid was troubled. That’s it. No need to have nightmares over it. 

The first night sleeping in that room was bad. You couldn’t sleep, unable to settle knowing that a murderer lay in the same bed previously. 

The second night was the worst. Something had woken you up that night, although you weren’t sure what actually woke you. However when you saw a guy in your room, you figured that might have been a strong lead. Slowly you sat up, eyes wide, your heart hammering against your chest. The boy slowly turned his head, eyes travelling from the desk to you.  “Scream and I slaughter you and everyone else in this house.” His cold tone stopped you from screaming. You recognised the boys hair from the many pictures you had found earlier that day but his mask and goggles made everything else indistinguishable.  “T-Toby?”  “So you know me.” Toby hummed in amusement. “You know, a friend told me new p-people had m-moved into this house, i thought he was talking shit. T-turns out he was right. Didn’t think mum would sell the place. So, how did you find this?” You could remember what he was referring to. Slowly but carefully, as to not provoke the boy, you crawled further down the bed to peer at what he held in his gloved hands and caught sight of two bloodied hatchets. You felt even more terror rush through you. You dragged your eyes to the picture in Toby’s hands, the family picture.  “Uhh, your mum left everything behind, she left a f-few months ago.”  “Really?” Toby hummed looking down at the picture.  “My room h-hasnt changed. Why this room? My –” Toby paused. “The other room is bigger.” “It’s damaged.” You said quietly. “At least something went how it was intended.” Toby sighed. “I hate this house with everything I’ve got.” Toby’s head moved around, inspecting the room. “Yet it’s still weird to see a stranger in my bed.” “It’s weird sleeping in it.” You mumbled and Toby chuckled, his hand moving to one of his hatchets idly. “Are you going to kill me?” You whispered. Toby seemed to contemplate his answer. “If I were my friend, you’d have been sliced and diced by now. You’ve been good, k-keep it up and you m-might just live.” That was a fighting chance. “Do you want to take any of your stuff with you?” You nodded to the boxes and splayed items across the desk. Toby looked then over. “No, that isn’t me anymore but look at you being nice and polite. It won’t get you a-anywhere.” “It’s worth a shot?” You said lightly making Toby chuckle. “You’re funny. Tell you what, you keep quiet that I was ever here and forget about this and you’ll be alive without even a scratch on you. We’ll never cross paths again.” Never tell a soul and act like this never happened? You could work with that, you didn’t necessarily want to remember this anyway. You nodded. “I can do that."

Toby looked to the bedroom window. "And get a lock for that window, you don’t want my friends and I getting in.” You nodded again. Slowly Toby lifted his hatchet. You trembled slightly. He held it out towards you. “Get in bed.” You complied, never tearing your eyes from him. “Remember the deal, you talk and I come back here to finish you off and everyone else here. Got it?” You nodded. 

You woke up that morning, you didn’t remember falling asleep. Everything around you was untouched, just as you left it. No sign of Toby Rogers ever being there. You weren’t sure if it was just a nightmare or if he really did pay you a visit but you didn’t want to find out. A ghost, a dream or real, you weren’t going to say a word.

[tillman]

hi i ranked every single dark souls 1 character by who i think is the most kissable . its 79 characters all with a description of why theyre at the place theyre at with images for reference :-) its all under cut for u to enjoy.. thank u

this is all my opinion cus hehe im making the list but also im god so this is fact now . 

counting down because u know what ! buildup is fun and i have to start off with everyones most favorite:

GWYN - 79

im kidding. fuck gwyn and everything he stands for. he wouldnt even be a good kisser he doesnt have FUCKING LIPS

SEATH - 78

oh you really wanna kiss the incel dragon who kidnaps ladies for his weird experiements?? yeah?? who are you, big hat logan?

EINGYI - 77

heres one i wont get hate for: this fucking asshole . die bastard . he cant even kiss his face is all infected and gross!

KAATHE - 76

he sucks.

SMOUGH - 75

not only is he too big to kiss! hes a cannibal!! hed eat you!!!! thats no kiss i want!

MANUS - 74

listen i know yall love daddies and all that but hes manipulative and not a nice person so id watch out. i GUESS hes kissable as he was a human before but def not a good kiss

BED OF CHAOS - 73

its just some vines that sometimes set on fire!! If it were still the witch of izalith she would be probally in the 20s as shes a good person who tried very hard to help the world but in this state... u cant even kiss her!

FRAMPT - 72

better than kaathe but the whole no lips and being a manipulative snake monster really throws me off and shoves him down at the bottom

FINA (GODDESS OF LOVE/BEAUTY (?)) - 71

(mentioned character - no image sorry :-( )

Listen as much as im all for love, this is love u dont want ! just trust me dont be lautrec dont do it you dont want to kiss fina listen to me. please dont kiss fina.

VINCE AND NICO - 70

way of the white members are NOTABLY unkissable but these guys. are just so boring. theyll be your white bread boyfriend as neil would say... bad kissers and bad people!

LAUTREC - 69 

aw fuck wait can i make another character 69 he doesnt deserve it. anyways not only is he not over his ex (fina) hed probally gut you and steal your lunch money half way through the kiss anyways so whats the point . thats not how u treat a lover idiot

CENTIPEDE DEMON - 68

it eats your face and you die. next pleaaase

PETRUS - 67

another way of the white cleric. he at least starts off nice and he says fuck rich people but also he let that happen to rhea and i fucking hate his guts so no.

PALADIN LEEROY - 66 

out of all the way of the white idiots hes the best in that he wears armor and seems cool but its the way of the white man.  i cant get past that. sorry leeroy at least your armor is cool. he probably hasnt kissed someone in hundreds of years anyways 

MOONLIGHT BUTTERFLY - 65

delicate ... but beautiful! i dunno how to smooch it but i def would if i could ! i dont think it can kiss back but, o well! we all have flaws

IRON GOLEM - 64

it cant kiss back but its COOL and can throw me like a javelin so like . yeehaw id smooch its little face place 

UNDEAD MERCHANTS (BOTH) - 63

between moss and yulia i think they got enough on their plates! plus since theyre so hollowed, i dont think they have any lips to kiss back with! 

INGWARD - 62

hes not like . bad persay but also i dont trust him after he helped with new londo. cool design tho. i wanna kiss that bird beak mask

JEREMIAH - 61

was a bullfrog, and never took off his crown long enough to kiss another person...... i feel like if he did though! oh boy!!!

Asylum Demon + Demon Firesage + Stray Demon - 60

more kissable than some bosses, but still not the greatest lips. good butts though on all of them.... so i guess thats fr u kinky people 

SNUGGLY THE CROW - 59

(no image shes a crow) 

please stop drawing her as an anime girl shes literally just a grow that likes warm things oh my god you freaks be nice to her

BIG HAT LOGAN - 58

hes hard to kiss around the hat! and on that note hes pretty much taken with his obsession with seath. good luck! hes nice though so better than most of this list so far

GAPING DRAGON - 57

ranked so high because past its giant underbelly of teeth and destruction is this very tiny head which i think is so funny i cant help but want to kiss its little snoot.... hehe baby

PRINCE RICARD - 56

oh now were actually getting into kissable range! ricard is a prince (maybe even of astora... kissability increase.) so his high ranking might get you some kissability points, but the hollowing is gonna lower that. 4/10 no kissable lips!

4 KINGS - 55

whats better than a prince..... a king... whats better than a king..................  4 KINGS! just watch out for their overly anime spiky armor and the fact their in a never ending void nightmare but they do have faces so thats points above the rest!

SALAMAN - 54

(mentioned character only! sorry!)

hmmmm we dont learn much about him other than he was close with quelana and he was ............ hot!  hes a pyromancer.  being of the great swamp pushes him down a bit because he prolly smells like his name sake but u know what ! maybe hes cute! we cant be sure! hes in the running at least!

TAURUS DEMON - 53

hmm... bad lover.... good kisser................................................... the things i do for big beefy demon love.

GOUGH - 52

While you cant kiss gough cus all the sap in his helmet i cant bare to put him lower than he is hes just so sweet. a kiss on his helmet because i love him so much

NITO - 51

while he cant kiss back, nito deserves a kiss or two! plus he has a lot of hands so u can hold his hands and be hugged at the same time and u know what that might be just as good as a nice kiss. good on you nito!

STONE DRAGON - 50

again a non kisser........ damn beaks! the stone dragon does need a kiss though. they havent seen another living soul in years down in ash lake! so im giving them points on that alone.

VAMOS - 49

like the last two.... no lips! vamos though makes up for it in his charm and wit, and his exceptional skill in smithing! so even without lips to kiss, you still should kiss vamos! hes a good friend

ARIAMIS - 48

(mentioned !)

wow... a painter! and a skilled one at that! this man created the painted world used to keep priscilla safe and that is so noble it gives him points right off the bat! i feel like though, as an artist, he might be a bit weird about it. so watch out and be safe, but in the end, get free art and some free smooches out of him!

ELIZABETH - 47

thats my mom ... of course she gets a good cheek smooch for all her hard work keeping dusk safe!

DOMHNALL - 46

i love domhnall hes a good guy whos trying his best but also his mask is so fucking goofy i dunno if i can do it .

RICKERT - 45

as much as i think rickert would be a good kiss (hes smart, cute, and skilled!) he is trapped behind some bars willingly and probably wont let you in. i can dream though!

CEASLESS DISCHARGE - 44

if theres any boss that NEEDS a kiss its him. poor dude lost all his family and was turned into this laughing stock of a creature. youd probably burn your lips but .... please just be nice to him :-(

SHIVAS BODYGUARD - 43

ooo a strong yet silent type.... hes even cute under his mask! good kiss, but i feel like he might just care more about his actual job than a kiss ! hes dedicated !

CIARAN - 42

putting aside me knowing shed be a good kisser, i just understand she probably doesnt want a kiss right now, shes grieving over the loss of her friend and i respect her comfort. maybe a good pat on the shoulder and a cup of nice tea with her would be nice though! 

PINWHEEL - 41

may seem like a weird choice to put a necromancer up so high on the list but.... honestly pinwheel needs some love. dude lost his whole family and in trying to revive them accidentally fused them to himself. while he might not be the best kisser, i honestly just wanna tell him everythings gonna be ok.

KIRK - 40

ok if you know me you KNOW how much it pains me to put kirk so low but. hes a busy guy! not only is he doing so much work to help out where he can with the fair lady, but you might just get pricked by his spiky armor while youre going in for the smooch! so, as much as he deserves a kiss for all his hard work, maybe pass until another time!

SIEGLINDE - 39

were getting there! she is just so strong... and so brave........ she may not even be undead! sieglinde is so strong and wonderful doing all that just to deliver a message to her unruly father, she deserves so many kisses! Shes got a lot on her plate though so please respect her......

BERENIKE - 38

(just mentioned!)

implied to be a huge strong knight who made it to even sens fortress! yes please ! 

BELL GARGOYLES - 37

hmmmmm,.......... if u can get past the whole lighting your face on fire, these are two loyal gargoyles! that seems pretty good to me!

BEATRICE - 36

a wonderful helpful witch friend! she is so nice to help you defeat flying bosses with her magic!! i love her so much! shes even cute to boot! 

GIANT BLACKSMITH - 35

HE HELP ANYTIME................... I HAVE TO GIVE HIM A KISS FOR ALL HIS HARD WORK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LEGALLY I HAVE TO !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

RHEA - 34

putting aside my hatred of the way of white.... rhea really is just a babey.... shes adorable and kind and just wants everyone to be ok so im won over. maybe a little forehead smooch for being such a good person!

OSCAR - 33

oh oscar. a noble, heroic, and cute knight but in the end. would he be a good kisser........ i feel yes, but maybe not so much so! hes busy focusing on being a hero you know! hes a good friend and i cant help but fall in love with nice guys

THE FAIR LADY - 32

she deserves the entire world and all i can give her is my humanity and a kiss........... sobs. i wish i could do more to ease her pain but she is so strong and wonderful! please give her a nice smooch! 

QUELANA - 31

i didnt wanna separate them ........ her wonderful sister! who even taught humans pyromancies! shes smart and nice, and honestly probably needs a kiss. 

MILDRED - 30

uh my notes from last night are just

so yeah! thats mildred!

CRESTFALLEN MERCHANT - 29

hes sad as fuck but also... kinda handsome! he was a knight of berenike and made it almost all of the way through sens fortress showing how skilled he is! a strong man like this (inspired by maybe the best kisser in demons souls, boirr) has to be a good kiss!

SIEGMEYER - 28

hes going through a lot right now but... how could u not think siegmeyer is kissable. thats on you man. thats your own character flaw.

OSWALD - 27

ok this might be slightly controversial but i feel like oswald would be a good kisser. if you got past his slightly weird love for velka who well get to (thats just carimites (carimians? carimfolk???)) hes nice and kind and maybe the funkiest character in dark souls

KALAMEET - 26

another cant kiss you but.... kalameet is just so cool ! very shadow the hedgehog and u know what that is NOT a bad thing. you might have a rough time trying to get there, but..... aww whos a good dragon.....

DARKMOON KNIGHTESS - 25

alright the final stretch! the darkmoon knightess is the anor londo firekeeper, and a friend of gwyndolin! shes supposed to be “ugly and shit” (real quote. i would never lie to you) but her model is so cute! defiantly kissable as fuck!

 SANCTUARY GUARDIAN - 24

GOFH ITS JUST A WIDDLE KITTEY CAT........... I GIVE IT A WIDDLE KISSEY ON ITS FOREHEAD AHOWHWWAWWW BABEY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ALVINA - 23

AWHAHWAWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW SHES H(FADOESAGVFOSDHFSO CUET EIFEDKC LKOFIE JS I LOVE YOU FJEADFIDASHCODEUFCUSFKSDHFKSUHFC

DUSK - 22

oh yes!! the princess of a lost land...... will you be her knight in shining armor.......... oh i just love her so much. shes sweet and nice and cute and deserves a kiss or two!! please be nice to my daughter!

SHIVA - 21

hottie with cool armor and a cooler sword. since they cut his whole sidequest i can with all certianty say YES he is super kissable and is probably a great kisser 

QUELAAG - 20

IGNORIGN HER GIANT SPIDER LOWERBODY........... SHES JUST DOING THIS FOR HER SISTER SHE JUST WANTS TO HELP HER POOR SISTER WHOS IN PAIN HOW COULD YOU NOT LOVE HER SO MUCH!! PLEASE KISS QUELAAG! 

GRIGGS - 19

im putting griggs so high cus hes kissable in a factor unseen before...... baby factor. hes soft and nice and is just trying to find his dad! just tuck him into bed and kiss him goodnight! its what he deserves! 

ARTORIAS - 18

everyone already KNOWS why artorias is a good kisser. hes nice, strong, brave, and most importantly. cool as FUCKING HELL ! HE DOES SICK ANIME FLIPS!! if you can look past the abyss slowly taking him over, youll find a good good boy who deserves a good kiss.

ANASTACIA - 17

the good firekeeper who we spend most of our time with in 1! YES of COURSE Shes kissable. she deserves SO MANY kisses for all of her hard work in keeping the firekeep shrine lit! good job anastacia im sorry lautrec is like that

VELKA GODDESS OF SIN - 16

(just mentioned!)

if her title alone doesnt bring you in, youll be pleased to know shes implied to help watch over priscilla (who well get to hold your horses) and keep the poor girl safe! a strong sense of justice and a love of crows, shes probably an amazing kiss if you can find her! 

ANDRE - 15

were closing in on #1 and i just have to throw andre in here. hes so nice and strong! just . please kiss andre! he deserves some he does so much work! 

PRISCILLA - 14

poor priscilla. called a monstrous crossbreed and has to hide in a painted world to stay safe from those who would hurt her. including the internet! leave her alone you freaks shes not your fetish fuel!!! she deserves a good kiss on the cheek and a hug for all she has to put up with

 CRESTFALLEN WARRIOR - 13

its my list i get to put the crestfallen warrior where i want. and u know what? he would honestly be a good kiss. hes kind and helpful and never once wishes you harm, he just needs to be held tightly and kissed passionately and u know what. dont we all. 

GWYNEVERE - 12

she is beautiful but .... 1 shes married and 2 shes not even real! whatever. her husband the flame god flann is at least.......... hot! haahgdaefshdfcdhswfe im so fucking funny

BLACK IRON TARKUS - 11

listen i see a big beefy dude i go “hey thats hot please kiss me” so of course tarkus is this high up hes the beefiest dude around.... right?? anyways all knights of berenike are kissable hes just the MOST kissable of the 3 named ones!

ORNSTEIN - 10

this dude kisses the son of gwyn you KNOW hes a good kiss. the golden lion armor just helps so much. we love you ornstein .....

HAVEL THE ROCK - 9

HERE HE IS ... THE BEEFIEST GUY AROUND ... this bitch uses a DRAGONS TOOTH as a huge club to bash people with if that isnt big dick energy i dont know what is. armor made of stone. heart made of gold. havel the rock please god kiss me passionately under the moonlight .

SIF - 8

oghfoghfohg puppey..................................... SMOOCHIE THE PUPPY>...........

NAMELESS KING (!?) - 7

(hes just mentioned in ds1!!) 

I KNOW HES A DS3 BOSS BUT LISTEN TO ME THEY TALK ABOUT HIM SO MUCH IM ALLOWING THIS.  he defected from his awful dads team to go help the DRAGONS!! thats so cool hes so kissable. would be more kissable if he wasnt kissing ornstein but thats ok . i respect them both.

MARVELOUS CHESTER - 6

this MAY just because i have a huge crush on him but also here are some good kissable things about him: his fasion, his voice that sounds like a purr, his laugh, his malice, his funny mask, him. thank you for your time.

GWYNDOLIN - 5

FINAL FIVE! heres gwyndolin. the most kissable of all of gwyns children for the sheer fact of how much work they put in to making sure people stay safe and happy. they are so kind and wonderful they deserve SO MANY kisses! good on you gwyndolin....

LAURENTIUS - 4

now heres a fun one! laurentius is one of the nicest guys u will EVER meet in any souls game. he genuinely cares about you, he loves and respects u even if u dont respect him or his skills, hes nice cute and above all: i love him . please kiss laurentius he is a nice guy who just wants the best for u..... dont be mean to him.....................

CAPRA DEMON - 3

the highest one that cant kiss back and thats for the capra demons SHEER HORNY ENERGIES. this is a demon you can fuck! thats it i have nothing else to say i just think the capra demon is funny

SOLAIRE - 2

do i seriously have to explain why solaire is so high up. not only is he nice and cares about you, hes handsome, passionate, and just a good fucking person. he is hands down one of the most kissable characters in any souls game ever! fuck yeah! go off you funky little lover boy! 

and finally.

its patches.

[midnightsnack-lexicon]

Oh my! I am really liking ghost Ephemer. Do you have any headcanons you are willing to share about him?

Sorry this took so long Anon! I usually write my headcanons down on various pieces of paper or different word documents so I had to track all of them down. Also I’m simply slow at writing oops.I’m going to do the notes on the KH3 keyblade war on another post, because this already took long enough to post and I don’t want to keep you waiting anymore. This said, let’s go!(Under a read more)

-probably died while protecting the others; he went against the enemy to buy them enough time to escape

-hasnt move on to the Final world or Kingdom hearts because he feels like he didn’t fully complete his role as a Leader

-i have a long headcanon on how hearts, souls, bodies and mind interact that I will share another time, but basically Emph at the moment is only soul and mind. The heart was in an heartless and now is waiting to return to him (in the same way that the nobodies can get their original hearts back after their heartless get defeated)

-some of the Keyblade Wielders of the War also still have fragments of soul in the form of memories that linger in their keyblade. Emph spends most of his time listening to them. It’s the most interesting thing he can do in here and it’s a way to relive Daybreak town and the fairytale times

-this pieces of soul are still here because while the Keyblade sends your heart to KH, some of them still had regrets (“I want to see him one last time”, “The War is not over yet I can’t die”, “I should have told her that”) so memories connected to that feelings remain in their keyblade

-Emph can’t leave the graveyard (yet)

-he isn’t always 100% conscious and present, because it takes a lot of energy. But he gets better with time and practice

-at first he is just a soul that stays together by willpower and lux, but he doesn’t realize it yet. He has no memories, no sense of self, no idea of who he is or what is happening.

-so it takes a while to realize that there’s a man coming regularly to the Graveyard, sitting there and talking. Empher tries to listen, and it takes years before he finally manages to stay present enough to hear him.

-the man talks about his school. He’s a Master now, and he and the surviving dandelions have used the lux they brought back from Daybreak Town to restore the worlds outside. They’re also training new keyblade wielders to protect them in the future. There’s no unions or Master of Masters or Fortellers anymore, and the man hopes that this will be enough to avoid another War.

-by the time Empher has enough energy to remember his past, Master Blaine isn’t coming to the Graveyard anymore, and Empher can only piece together foggy memories of one sided conversations to realize that the man was one of his old friends

-(he isn’t angry at Blaine for what he did. Sure, he acted on an hidden agenda at first, but he was only trying to create a better future for all of them)

-not many people come to the Graveyard after him. Some Masters bring their apprendices to tell them the story of the Keyblade War as a warning, but as time passes on is always less and less people, and the story gets less and less accurate to what actually happened

-its not only keyblade Wielders tho. Sometimes a person alone comes. It’s always someone different, but they all behave in the same way. They just seem to pop in, check that everything is still in its place, and then leave. They all wear a black coat that looks like the one from the MoM, but they’re all different sizes and bodies, so Empher is pretty sure they’re all different persons

-he has no idea what to make of them till after the last battle against Xehanort. Empher is still recharging when the black coat figure appears. They look around, same behavior as usual, then they pull out a big black box. In his state of limbo between conscious and unconscious, Empher vaguely remembers something from the book of prophecies about a black box. But it isn’t till the black coat is joined by four masked figures that he realizes that the various figures must have all been Luxu, the mysterious sixth Forteller. In his spent state Empher thinks that if Xehanort could change bodies, why wouldn’t Luxu be able to do the same and survive this long.

-another person that becames a regular is a white haired man that comes there to train.

-theres not much interaction between the two of them, the man just trains while Emph watches from far

-but the man keeps coming back to train, till one day he doesn’t

-he doesn’t show up for years, but when he comes back he has the MoM’s keyblade and an apprentice

-Emph recognizes Ven immediately

-he still looks like when they last saw each others, even if a lot of time has passed

-but jumping between worldlines is weird and time doesn’t work the same everywhere

-Emph is just happy to see someone of his old life again, alive and well

-(it’s been ages since Blaine last came to speak to him, he’s staring to feel lonely)

-he watches Ven train with his (new) master. Frome what Emph learns watching the twos, he doesn’t seem to remember his past

-(Blaine had explained to them that that could be one of the side effects of jumping worldlines. Knowing that doesn’t make Emph less sad)

-they came regularly to train. Emph wonders if they even have a base somewhere. Do keyblade wielders still live in Daybreak? Does Daybreak still exist?

-with the memories of the past Ven seems to have forgotten a lot of how to fight too, and the master doesn’t seem to be very patient with him

-till one day Emph watches him raise his keyblade (the MoM’s keyblade, Emph realizes) and divide Ventus’ heart in two

-Emph tries to come to the rescue of his friend, but a ghost can’t do much to change Fate

-all he can do is make sure that the light of Ven’s heart (that is so frail, when did it became so frail?) doesn’t vanish

-Emph doesn’t have much energy himself, being only a soul, but he still does what he can

-(years later he’s happy to find out that what little he did was enough to keep the light of Ven together till Sora found him)

-he sees Ven again when he comes to fight against the one that for a short time was his master

-he has friends with him, a blue haired girl and a boy with brown hair

-he watches the three fight against the master and the being made from Ven’s darkness, watches as Ventus’ two halves fight against one another, pure light versus pure darkness, and watches as they forge the χblade and summon kingdom hearts

-(not again, Emph thinks. Not another war please. He and Ven worked so hard to avoid last one)

-luckily the three manage to dismiss kingdom hearts, but the three come out of it gravely wounded, both in body and heart

-Emph can only trust the girl to take care of Ven and the other boy

-the defeated master reappears after years. Epmh watches as he and a few other hooded figures perform a complex magic to call souls from the past into the present

-he sees the younger version of the master, the figure made from Ven’s darkness, and two men who could both be the older versions of Ven’s friend, plus another white haired kid who has an armor similar to Ven’s darkness one’s

-he doesn’t see the faces of the hooded figures at first.

-He’s surprised when one of them pulls down the hood and look vaguely familiar. Wasn’t there a Dandelion with the same platinum hair, playing cards at the Moogle’s cafe once?

-another familiar face appears when the one with the sitar pulls down the hood. This time Emph is sure that he looks the same as the Dandelion that used to play at the square’s fountain.

-the girl pulls down her hood and he’s sure that he’s seen Lauriam hang around with her, when he was looking for his sister

-and there he is, Lauriam, the last one of that weird group to reveal his face. He looks older, his hair have gotten longer (how did they even fit under the hood?), But the thing that shocks Emph the most is the eyes. Everyone in the group has bright gold eyes, his old friend included

-(they’re colder than when they were bright blue. Emph can’t imagine what those eyes have seen since he last saw him)

-he tries to contact his friend, hoping that the connection of their friendship is enough to connect their hearts and talk. But when trying to reach him he finds a stranger’s heart blocking him.

[coming somewhere in the future: Emph during the Third Keyblade War, featuring flying keyblades and two Leaders on different sides]

[theflowersofdoom]

gonna talk about my spooky side account lore bc its unabashedly my favorite

sam and his sibling max lost their parents to to the bringer when they were really young. they were freed from terror mountain when the hannah thing went down. sam had trouble adjusting and stayed in terror mountain for awhile while max eagerly went out into world. the two kept in constant contact, until max suddenly stopped replying after he traveled to the haunted woods. sam decided to leave for the haunted woods to look for his sibling, and had a pretty terrifying time of it until he met lonnie

lonnie is a ne’er-do-well grave robber squatting in an abandoned house in the middle of the haunted woods. he found a very afraid and confused sam stumbling around and took him in with the intention of using him to help in illegal activities. sam, being cut off form the world for 10000 yrs and being generally too trusting, enthusiastically goes along with him. the two run around causing trouble and eventually lonnie finds himself actually CARING about this  sweet bori

paix was born to a terrestrial aisha and alien aisha couple and was raised exclusively on the virupets space station. her childhood had a backdrop of constant and oppressive paranoia of sloth. her family had several connections with the resistance and as a result knew several ppl who either disappeared or were seriously negatively effected by the sloth empire. she even lived through the sloth takeover of virtupets, which while thankfully was relatively uneventful on the part of the station her family lived in, it was still pretty terrifying for 10-or-smth yr old. while all this died down when paix grow up to adult, her parents were still very protective, not allowing paix or her little sister to travel unsupervised and helicoptered pretty bad. paix prided her self in being very level headed, but then one of her only friends disappeared while tracking down a sloth aligned organization and is presumed dead, paix is absolutely devastated, and in the months following his disappearance she quietly takes a small, former resistance ship from a family friend. she intended on flying it to neo central and parking it somewhere visible where the authorities would find it and return it with her apology note sitting in the seat of the cockpit, meanwhile shes in faerieland or mystery island, she doesnt know where just anywhere she’ll figure it out when she gets there. 

what ACTUALLY happened was a little more dramatic than she intended

paix initially and rightfully doesnt trust lonnie much, but he IS nice enough to let her stay at his house after she  crashed into his back yard  (is this even his house? i looks like its been run down for a while). sam was amazed in meeting a real alien and paix liked him well enough, hes a very kind guy, but still the whole situation was suspect

she probably wouldnt have stayed for long if lonnie hadnt up and died on them

paix suspected murder, from what sam says lonnie wasnt the most liked person around, but its not like theres any laws this is the haunted woods. as far as sam knows lonnie doesnt have any family, he thinks once there was a sister mentioned but he didnt even get a first name. the only family sam had left was a missing sibling he had been trying to find for a year now. so paix helps sam bury him in the back yard

paix takes on a lot of the responsibilities, like get food and telling people that lonnie is in fact dead, he wont be bothering you anymore. she even starts helping sam in his attempts to track down his sibling (shes not super optimistic but its not like shes going to tell sam that). 

at first paix thinks that sam is just very, VERY upset. he hasnt been very tired and acting a little strange, but his friend just died in front of him, its not like she has any room to judge. but as time goes on, things seem increasingly off. theres breif moments where sam seems to be his old self, but more and more he seems confused. paix finds him standing in the middle of the hall, staring at the wall. theres times where sam doesnt remember where hes been or what he was doing just moments ago. paix goes to the attic to get sam, finding no one, only to remember that sam is asleep in the in the living room, and when she goes back down staris of course hes still there, passed out on the couch like he has been all day, why was she so sure there was someone in the attic

when it becomes clear that lonnies been possessing sam, paix has a weird mix of terror and relief, though its drowned out by how PISSED she is at lonnie. she yells at him in portuguese for WHILE before he explains that he really wasnt trying to hurt sam or steal his body or anything else paix is accusing him of, hes been trapped in the ghost zone since he died and nothing he did could get their attention (he had gotten SO CLOSE with paix, she seemed to almost hear him. paix remembers all the times she felt she was being watch or heard someone screaming and just shrugged it off as a side effect of the haunted woods) 

paix could absolutely kill him AGAIN when he goes on to explain that hes now stuck in sams body. she begrudgingly agrees to help lonnie not be stuck, using a ritual from one of the weird creepy books littered around the house. it works and paix is incredibly relieved to find that sam is alright, but then immediately un-relieved to feel someone standing behind her and turned around to find lonnies spooky ghost standing there, menacingly 

the tension was immediately broken as sam  scrambled up screaming YOURE ALIVE and attempting to tackle-hug lonnie only to go through him and crash into the wall

and after paix gives lonnie a peice of her mind and lonnie profusely apologizes to both her and sam, things fall back into normality. paix and sam have found ways to make a living without doing anything illegal. lonnie is somewhat weirder as a ghost, hes taken a liking to scaring the heck out of ppl and is back to being a menace, but he seems to be more sincere with sam and paix at least 

zaf generally doesnt like photos, meko probably caught them by surprise 

zaf was a unfortunate victim of one of the many sloth-aligned splinter groups, and while they have made an amazing recovery, they remember nothing before waking up in the hospital. they were told that they had been kidnapped and eventually were found and taken in by authorities before being treated and successfully reverted to the physiology of an average mutant kacheek. zaf knows theres more to the story that authorities and their friends arent telling them, and has vague memories, but zaf isnt sure if they want to remember them. they were told by their friends that they had been a zafara before, that they were kind and generous and everyone was devastated when they went missing. zaf, surrounded by people that they cant remember, felt incredibly guilty. they hear stories about themself that they cant remember or even relate to. they ask for descriptions of themself that dont feel like them, least not anymore. zaf looks at pictures of this person that doesnt even look like them, and they cant help but feel like that person isnt here anymore.

zaf distances themself and eventually leaves neo central, taking a job at a hotel in the haunted woods. they have trouble finding a place to stay, and on their way to look at yet another apartment, they mistakenly knock on the door of a spotted bori who has THE friendliest face theyve seen since they moved to the woods

the two talk until its dark out and sam insists they stay the night bc its not safe to be out are you kidding me its the haunted woods. paix, given her past, is suspicious before zaf mentions what happened to them and she straight up offers for them to stay indefinitely (good thing too bc sam was pretty confident the place they had been on their way to see was a scheme to murder people, which seemed way more alarming to zaf than it did sam)

it takes 3 days for zaf to meet lonnie bc hes busy being an ass, slamming doors and leaving creepy messages in the mirror, culminating into jump-scaring zaf in the hallway at 3 in the morning. paix had tried to warn them but its still a spooky ghost in your apartment. sam mentioned that lonnies body was buried in the back yard and zaf looked like they were about to cry. just two sweet kids living in a dilapidated old house thats haunted by their dead friend, whose body they had bury in the back

zaf seems to be the only one concerned about the skulls in the living room, and the strange books, all of which, at least the ones zaf can make sense of, contain what appears to be spells. they mentioned where they lived to their boss and some coworkers and all hell broke loose and zaf had to leave the premises. paix apologized and said that lonnie had a reputation with the hotel staff and it kind of extended to everyone esle in the house. lonnie zipped through the ceiling and stated that they had ALWAYS had it out for him even BEFORE he stole that golf cart and the two start up another argument and the initial point is lost. 

but even months afterward, zaf cant forget the the moment of panic in their former boss’s eyes when they mentioned the house

mini is a witch living in the woods. sam and the gang think shes their neighbor, but no one is really sure where she lives. she comes by the house every now and then. sam, paix, and zaf have invited her in but always stated that she cant come in. has started to come around more frequently after zaf showed her one of the book they had found, wondering if she could make any sense of it. usually cryptic mini straight up said it was incredibly dangerous in the wrong hands. the two have since working through the books to see if any of more of them had spell theorems that could ‘potentially warp the fabric of reality’ as mini had put it

[batsintheshadows]

Athera the Companion

Inquisitor’s Name: Athera Lavellan Race / Class / Specialisation: Rogue Elf Assassin Gender Identity: Female

Varric’s Nickname for them: Antlers

Short bio: As a typical da’len hunter nearing the time she could recieve her vallaslin, Athera was taken by slavers while away from the camp with her younger brother. Her sacrifice allowed the clan to escape, but lead to a grueling ordeal before she escaped and found her way back home. Now she is a respected hunter and occasionally travels to visit the elves that live in human cities, so they may know more of their history should they be interested. She also assists with problems that the human guards tend to ignore.

What would their companion card look like? I actually commissioned one of these! it hasnt quite been finished yet tho.

Athera aiming her bow high above her head with a victorious smile as the sun rises, a halla head with three arrows in the horns formed from the clouds behind her and a green bird perched on her shoulder, coat billowing in the wind.

More under the cut, because theres gonna be a LOT here.

Recruitment mission: Athera approaches the Inquisition in Val Royeaux, quietly and from a side street. She wears a hood to hide her face and when asked about it she says that she may be making a poor choice, and if she is it would be better to have the option to hide. Athera tells the Inquisitor that she is visiting family in the city, and has discovered that elves have been vanishing. She says she wants to see what’s going on, but has a feeling that whatever is happening is too much for one person to handle. If pressed about her identity, Athera stays vague, saying that she could get in trouble for looking into this at all, and wouldn’t want that to affect anyone she cares about.

If the Inquisitor agrees to investigate she tells them to meet her at a certain location at midnight, and not to worry about her too much. She has enough martial training to help in any fights there might be.

When you meet up with her, Athera is nervous, checking her arrows and pulling her hood down further over her face. If you ask her about it she says she hasnt ever done “anything quite like this” before.

When you enter the building, you discover a slaver ring and some captured elves. Athera strikes first, no matter what you say, and in the ensuing fight her hood comes off, revealing her vallaslin. when everything is said and done Athera very pointedly ignores the party in favour of freeing the captured elves, who are very grateful for her arrival. She asks if they will be able to get back to the alienage safely and one of them says that they can get them there, leaving Athera free to look for letters and talk to the party.

She picks up some letters and folds her arms, and asks the Inquisitor if they are going to take any sort of action now that they know a Dalish elf is meddling in the city. There is an option to tell her that if she joins The Inquisition then the Inquisitor will stay quiet. Athera is silently furious, but says she would prefer this to end without bloodshed if possible. Athera Greatly Disapproves if you pick this option. You can also ask about her lying to the group. Athera claims she never lied and points out the ways that everything she said was technically true.

Otherwise you can attempt to turn her in, which causes her to flee and become unrecruitable. or you can say that you won’t alert the guards. In the latter case, she is grateful and asks to join The Inquisition. When asked why she says:

“I’m not stupid. A big hole in the sky? Demons around every corner? This could be the end of the world. My clan can’t outrun that. You’re the only ones I’ve seen even trying to make a difference. If theres any way out of this, its with the people that arent caught up in petty squabbles. So yes, I won’t like being away from my clan for so long, but I’ll like it even less if the world dies.”

She agrees to meet the Inquisitor back in Haven, and pulls her hood back up, heading off into the night.

Where they would be in Skyhold / Haven: In Skyhold she would probably hang around in the gardens, but move to somewhere around the stables if it was converted into a chantry garden. In Haven she would be on the docks by the frozen lake.

Personal quests: 

Quest 1: After arriving in Skyhold and gaining some approval, Athera will go over what she found in the slavers letters. She says that the slavers were reporting to a merchant called Vivicus, and that she suspects that theyre related to the Venatori. Athera has followed a trail that has ended in Redcliffe, and asks the Inquisitor to go with her as backup. If the Inquisitor tries to bring Dorian, the cutscene will not trigger and Athera will suggest trying again with “company better suited to the operation. Like people that never owned slaves maybe.” Once the cutscene triggers, Athera give you what she knows about the slaver. A small and pretty easy fight with demons ensues as you enter the building, and the party makes it up the stairs to a room with a man in fine clothes sitting on a chair facing away from the group. As the group approaches, the man falls sideways when touched, revealing he is very dead and has a note stapled to his chest that simply says “your move Inquisition -V”. Athera is upset by this, and tells the Inquisitor that they need to be sure the body gets proper death rites. Back at Skyhold Athera thanks the Inquisitor for their help and apologises for dragging them into her mess. She says that itll probably last a while as well, if this guys as much of an asshole as he seems to be.

Quest 2: Occurs after either The Fade or The Winter Palace. Athera is reading a letter, and claims that its information on Vivicus. If asked about where the letter came from, Athera says she’s been tracking weird courier orders and got lucky with this one. Athera says the letter reveals that Vivicus has somehow discovered her identity and is using it against her. She doubts her clan will be targeted, but asks permission to grant them safe passage through the surrounding lands and trading rights at Skyhold. She admits that in spite of what her clan could bring in, its really just a favour to her. If the Inquisitor agrees, you get the option to open a new area on the war table, but cannot select Dorian for the mission. When you arrive, you run into an ambush of slavers who seem to be expecting you. The fight is really difficult, but you only need to defeat half the slavers to trigger a rescue by Athera’s clan. As the last of the slavers fall, Athera gets the attention of one of the hunters and gives him a big hug, introducing him as her younger brother Elgadir. Elgadir is overjoyed to see his sister again and says the clan has been worried since she stopped writing. Athera replies she has been writing weekly and getting letters back as well. After a bit of confusion, they figure out something weird is going on, and tells the other hunters to check if any of the slavers are still alive. One is, and they get to them before the throat cutters do. Elgadir says that he doesnt much like the idea of bringing a slaver back to any of the clans camps, but if this problem is gonna get solved then they’ll probably have to. one of the other hunters goes ahead to warn the clan to prepare for a captive and some guests. Elgadir gives the Inquisition members a warning that if they do anything foolish, they will pay with their lives, but if they approach in good faith, then the clan will be happy to do business with them. The party is introduced to the clan and Athera goes off to talk with her brother and the Keeper, leaving the team free to explore. There are a few quests to help the clan or act like a dick, Athera gets approval or disapproval for them even though she isnt in the active party. To advance the quest, you enter the Keeper’s aravel. Athera sits with her brother hugging her, clearly distressed. The Keeper tells the Inquisitor that they have all come to a consensus that it would be a lot easier to deal with the situation with all the facts, and asks Athera if she would be willing to tell the story herself. Athera then tells the Inquisitor that she was taken from her clan by slavers around six years ago, and though she managed to fake her death and escape, Vivicus has discovered her identity and has been intercepting her letters for a while. The letter that sent her running back to her clan was to be sent to the person that owned her, and she intercepted a similar one at Skyhold intended to sow some discord. Athera says that its probably a game to Vivicus now, and that he will go to any lengths to win. She fears for her clan, as she fears for those she has become close with outside of it. At the prompting of the other two elves, Athera also admits to being very stressed out, since the Inquisitor unknowingly hired someone from the family that used to own her. “Theres a reason I don’t get along with Dorian, I’m scared to death of him.” The Inquisitor can tell Athera to stay with her clan for safety, offer to expel Dorian from the Inquisition (Athera will reject this idea because she knows the Inquisitor wouldnt have let Dorian stay if they didnt like him or need his help.), or keep to the plan of allowing the clan safety in the lands around Skyhold. Back at Skyhold, Athera thanks the Inquisitor for listening to her, saying she feels far more at ease now that someone knows, but begs the Inquisitor not to tell anyone her secret and to make tracking down Vivicus as much of a priority as possible, otherwise she doesnt know what could happen to her.

Quest 3: Takes place after the second main quest you complete after unlocking Skyhold. Athera and Dorian are arguing as the Inquisitor approaches them, though most of the shouting seems to be coming from Athera’s side with a lot of what is obviously swearing in elvish. When pressed, Athera accuses Dorian of going through her letters, and Dorian denies the accusation. “If you would listen before you started screaming at me, you would know that this is my letter. That I was trying to give to you quietly. But if you insist on discussing this in the courtyard...” Athera snatches the letter and runs away, leaving Dorian to ask the Inquisitor to go after her, saying that Athera probably wouldn’t want to see him right around now. When the Inquisitor finds Athera she is incredibly upset, and lets them know that this letter has been opened and Dorian knows who she is now. The Inquisitor can comfort her or be awful, and after theyre done talking Dorian knocks on the door, asking to come in. Athera tells him to keep his distance, and he agrees. Trying to lighten the tension, Dorian makes a joke about how Vivicus is really an idiot if he thinks sending Dorian a letter is going to do anything, what with the whole pariah thing. No one laughs. Athera asks Dorian what he’s going to do, and Dorian suggests using the note to lure Vivicus out. “We’ve been playing cat and mouse for months. I’ll be glad to see it end.” Athera tells Dorian that she doesn’t trust him, and will only go if the Inquisitor comes too. Dorian agrees, and they begin to make a plan, through the door because Athera can’t face him yet. After this, a war table mission to smuggle a letter to Vivicus opens up, and once it is completed a mission on the storm coast opens up called “Trigger Venatori Trap”. Once there the party fights off some Venatori, and Athera slowly breaks ranks with the group, making herself an easier target and leading to Vivicus showing himself at last. The rest of the party sets up a good flanking position and a boss battle against Vivicus, who is a blood mage and ACTUALLY DOES BLOOD MAGE STUFF WHY DID THEY LEAVE THIS OUT OF DAI???, begins as Dorian makes a snappy “oh what an idiot” type remark at Vivicus. The party are victorious, and they return to Skyhold where Athera tells the Inquisitor that she has no idea what to do now, since she has no way of knowing who Vivicus sent letters to. If you did a war table mission to stop the letters, you are able to reassure her that the Inquisition has the situation under control. Athera says that she likes the Inquisition, and whatever comes she would like to stay until the end as long as her and Dorian are kept separate. Preferably on opposite sides of the castle. At this point Dorian wanders past because a little light humour won’t kill anyone and begins yammering on about their victory a little too nervously. He admits that he’s been feeling a bit nervous since finding out about Athera’s past, but has done some deep soul searching and wants to apologise for how the relationship between the two of them has been. He promises to try and do better in the future, to which Athera replies “You’d better! Your family put me through hell! The least you can do is try and make it better.” Dorian doesnt make eye contact, and promises to keep her words in mind. He also says that they don’t need to speak again if Athera needs space. Athera says that would be for the best, but she won’t complain if they end up working together since stopping the end of the world is more important than the hurt one person carries. As Dorian turns to leave, she lets him know that once corypheus is dead all bets are off, and that she’ll probably throw him out the window, but the comment doesnt have much bite to it.

How to get their approval: helping elves and mages, respecting artifacts, killing venatori, freeing slaves, and generally not being an ass.

How to get their disapproval: Cruelty to elves and elven relics, slavery in any form, chantry and templar supporting, being an ass to mages, and victim blaming anyone.

Are they romanceable? Y/N Can you have sex with them? Y/N Are they open to polyamoury? Y/N If they can be romanced and are not, will they begin a relationship / relationships with other character(s)? If so, who? Sera already gets with Dagna, so odds are Athera wouldn’t get with anyone if unromanced.

Who are they friendly with? Vivienne and Sera (after a while).

Who do they dislike? Cassandra, Dorian, and Solas.

Companion card changes: (use a text descrip. if you have no images)

Loyalty:  Athera stands in the middle of a dark forest, her bow ready to draw and a smile on her face as she moves. the trees are gnarled and twisted, something could be hiding in them. but she is armed, and the forest is her home.

Romance: (if any) The bow and arrows have been put aside, and Athera sits cross legged by a campfire. there are trees all around and Athera has a serene smile on her lips and a look of total peace in her eyes.

Side Missions: (eg: fetch / gather / kill quests) None because fuck those. Ok maybe destroying monuments to the Exalted March on the Dales. Thatd be pretty satisfying. Also a war table mission to ensure that no letters get to the Pavus family that unlocks a dialogue option at the end of Athera’s last quest.

Opinions on mages / templars / how the world is going to shit? Templars fuck shit up, mages have been friends and guides to the clan and the Templars always try to take them away and people get hurt. She would rather just leave the Templars alone entirely. And of course mages can be trusted with their own lives! Everyone else does it what makes them so bloody different?

She has more nuanced opinions on the Chantry and how it relates to the oppression of mages and elves, and how its all a bid for power, but she’ll only talk abt it with an Inquisitor she likes.

Something guaranteed to make them leave the party: defiling the graves at the elven burial site in the exalted plains, killing the golden halla, or straight up betraying her.

Special Events:

Imprisoned at Redcliffe: How is your Inquisitor holding up in Redcliffe, being slowly infected with red lyrium over the course of a year?

Athera is almost unable to speak at all after a year in Redcliffe. She talks in fragments, and when she first sees the Inquisitor she just stares at them for a long time with a blank look on her face, waiting for them to either do something or vanish. Whenever Dorian speaks she glares at him. After all, this guy from Tevinter shows up and then everything fails and the world dies? She’s been blaming him. The Inquisitor has to talk her down.

She puts all her remaining energy into the fight ahead, wordless, expressionless, and merciless. When it comes time to hold off the horde she says in the flattest voice possible “Going out. Hold them off. Do not fail. Dareth Shiral.”

At the Winter Palace: Does your Inquisitor enjoy the party, any special events with them at the Palace?

Athera spends most of the party doing things to mildly offend the Orlesian elite, talking with the elves, and quietly smashing expensive vases when no ones looking. She likes being in Halamshiral, hates what it is now, and corners more than a few nobles and gives them a “history lesson.” She will do the same to the Inquisitor if they ask, but will be less passive aggressive about it. She also complains about the outfits, saying she hates red but Josephine wanted everyone to “present a unified front” and she couldnt wriggle out of it.

She also takes joy in being announced as “Athera Lavellan, Hunter of Clan Lavellan and Emissary to the Cities.” since she’s betting he’s never had to introduce an elf before, let alone introduce one with a few titles.

When asked about it later, Athera says the only good thing at Halamshiral was Briala, with various comments depending on what happened.

In the Fade: Your Inquisitor’s reaction upon entering the Fade? Archdemon’s taunt, and Inquisitor’s response? Epitaph on their grave?

Athera does not understand any of this. She shoots arrows, mainly at wolves and terrible people. now there are demons here because its their home that theyre the ones invading and what with recent events theres pretty strong evidence that this sort of thing doesnt end well. Athera isnt mindlessly terrified, but she. wants. OUT.

Nightmare: “What’s this now? Valeria, pretending to be a wild elf? You looked much better in red.”

Athera: “Say that name one more time and I’ll rip you in half.”

OR

Nightmare: “Dont worry about Marcus hating you for leaving him. He died a month later, his thieving ways finally discovered and punished.”

Athera: “You-you’re lying! Theres no possible way for you to know that!”

Nightmare: “That you know of.”

Athera’s grave says “Losing Herself” 

Trespasser: What is your Inquisitor up to two years after Corypheus’ defeat? Any special events with them over the events of Trespasser?

Athera spent the past two years using the influence gained during her time in the Inquisition to help elves in both the cities and the wilds. she has busted up a few more slaver rings and is one of sera’s contacts. she has traded information with the Inquisition out of respect for her place in it and so leliana can send her some useful stuff back. she’s been using her clan as a safe place, and looks forward to returning every second she is away.

Other Major Events: Any other major events that happen with them over the course of the main game?

She becomes friends with Sera, who she likes for not taking things too seriously when everyone else is so grim.

She also has a Talk with a human Inquisitor romancing Sera that more or less amounts to “I know ur cool so this whole thing is probably legit, but if u ever hurt sera i’ll cut off your arm and hit u with it ok good talk kiddo love u bye!”

uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu this took a long time and a lot of thought, but i had LOADS of fun doing it! I always like working on Athera’s backstory, though nothing is quite 100% set in stone yet sooooo... dont quote me on any of this.

I was tagged by @heyscience and i am throwing this tag right back at you! Do it!

[abitofafatass]

I am still so hecked up about Grif leaving the rest of the Blood Gulch Crew honestly. I dont think there’s a single thing in RvB that has hecked me up more.

I’m going to try to not regurgitate what other people have said about him quitting the teams, but a lot of people have got my views of Grif and his characterization spot on.

This got way longer than I intended to and probably would have gone on longer if I wasnt so tired

First, this is probably the first time that we’ve seen Grif upset. We saw him utterly pissed off in season 13, right after Hargrove and the Staff of Charon showed up, with his angry pacing and cursing, but this is the first time that we see Grif isolate himself because something upset him. And Church’s reappearance clearly did.

The rest of the Blood Gulch Crew sprung into action to go save Church, but Grif went and hid. That tells me that he and everyone else were in different stages of mourning. Maybe the others had gotten past it, or they were in denial, or maybe the reappearance of Church hit a reset button, but whatever it was, Grif was clearly not on the same page as them.

I think its very telling though that no one noticed that Grif was not with the rest of the teams as they were getting ready. You could argue that no one noticed because Grif is usually slacking off when there’s work to be done, and that’s probably what the teams assumed. Blue team was arguing on whether or not they should leave right away, and the Reds were... doing Red Team nonsense as they usually do. But not even Simmons noticed that Grif wasnt right there right up until they were practically out the door. 

Grif is sitting in that damn cave, going through some heavy emotional shit, and no one bothers to notice. You know who else people constantly forget about, and dont realize when he’s not there? Doc. Grif was about as exactly important to the teams as Doc is, and since Grif has been on the Forgot Doc Train, he knows that’s “not at all” to “barely even” important.

This thought is solidified by the fact the only person who comes to find him is that damn reporter, the lady who started it all. Grif is obviously the kind of guy who doesnt like to talk about his feelings, or what’s bothering him. That’s why he hid in the cave in the first place. And yet, here comes the last person who he wants to see, and she wants to talk to him. All the while, Grif is probably aware that his teams are getting ready to go on their stupid mission.

Dylan made two mistakes when she talked to Grif. The first one was she made everything about Church, which was what Grif was upset with in the first goddamn place. The wound from Church’s most recent death is still very fresh, and on top of that, the happy peaceful life that Grif had finally gotten was getting uprooted. Again. All for some asshole. Remember, from Grif’s perspective, this most recent Church also had a penchant for abandoning them (first by going after Tex, going after Tex into the Epsilon Unit, ditching them for Carolina the first chance he got, going along with Carolina after the Director, fucking off with Carolina on Chorus...), so why the hell would Grif want to chase after Church again just to have him leave?

And then Dylan brings up Sister. For all Grif knows at this point, Kaikaina is dead. They have not talked since the end of season five, which, if my math is right, was anywhere from 6 to 8 years ago.How dare Dylan pretend to know him, how dare she bring up his sister, whom he himself hasnt seen in half a decade.

How dare she strip Grif of that safety blanket of apathy he’d built for himself since his first assignment, where everyone he’d served with and presumably grew to care about died.

Because as long as he could pretend to himself that he didnt care about these people, he didnt have to deal with the fear of losing them again (with a Church exception). Dylan took that away from him. So of course he had to decry that he hated the father figure that he obviously looked up to, at least enough to emulate under times of stress. Of course he’s going to scream he hates the guy that has been his best friend for close to a decade. 

Compare that outburst of anger and frustration to when he’d walked up to the Reds and Blues. I’m not certain how much time had passed since Grif stormed out of the cave, but he’d obviously had a chance to think things over, and he realized that he just.... couldnt go with them this time. He’d never wanted to be out here in the first place, and now he has a choice. This is really the first choice he could make about his future in at least a decade, probably longer. Probably since his mom left. Note, when he tells Tucker “I can do whatever I want” there’s a slight bubbly-ness to his voice. That realization filled him with a small bit of glee. He has a choice.

He has a choice to not put himself through the mental strain of Church coming back and leaving or dying again. He can chose to go with a team that openly threatens his life (even if its not as much anymore) and openly mocks and belittles him. He has a choice on whether or not to put himself into danger again. 

And I think even as he was saying he quit, Grif was sort of hoping that someone would talk him out of it. Because this is his family, possibly the only one he’s ever properly known. But they dont. They mock him, they insult him, and they call him selfish. 

So, he leaves.

In season 13, I was blown away by how brave Grif was to stand up and say fuck that to dying, and how much growth he as a character had. This season I’m amazed that he had the strength to look at a bad situation and say fuck that I cant put myself in that situation again, I’m leaving. Even if that means leaving family behind.

I honestly cant wait to see how this Refusing the Call gets resolved.

[omousvarii]

all of them

      you’re the worst lmao    -------- @jobikilled

01. What makes you the most emotional about your muse?oh gosh, probably the amount of guilt he carries. you’ve all seen gifs of him like “looks like he could kill you but is actually a smol cinnamon roll” and thats what gets me. also he cries a shit ton and just cute broken boys crying is legit my kryptonite.02. What made you decide to write this muse?gosh i dont even remember, its been like four years. i think after the episode I am become death, because it was when i really started growing attached to him. he was still a sassy pants but you could tell he was trying. also the whole thing that happened with him and murphy, the hanging. also i think when clarke and him had that moment where he admits hes a monster. him crying there set a trigger off and i was like i need to write this angst of a man now.03. If you could change one event in your muse’s life (in their main or canon verse), what would you change?ooo… this is a good one. uhm, probably the whole pike situation. i know he kinda leaned on pike as a leader and was hurt by the betrayal of lexa and trikru but idk, it always seemed weird to me. but i dont think i’d change it, the show would be completely different i think if he didn’t go with pike. so /shrug/04. If you could tell your muse one thing, what would you tell them?that i love him ; ~~ ; lol on a serious note tho, im not sure there is anything i could say that hasnt been said by the ones he loves. he’d take their words over mine anyways xD05. If you could give your muse one gift, what would you give them?like a thing? or can i be a god and give him back gina? lmao. maybe for his time in the ark i’d give him the book gina gave him—something he can read over the next 5 years lol. maybe i’d give him a whole library of greek mythology books on the ark rather than just re-reading one? maybe the gift of knowing that his sister is fine in the bunker?06. If you had to take one positive thing away from your muse, what would you take away?oh gosh he has so limited positive things why take them away ;_; can i say things he’s already lost? like gina, jasper and clarke (post s4) idk what else i could take without breaking him completely. he doesn’t have many physical things i can take from him. how about a gun? yeah that.07.  If you could “borrow” one aspect of your muse and apply it to yourself or your own life, what would you borrow?his undying love for his sister. dont get me wrong, i love my baby sister but to get the courage to—–if my sister was in octavias position and was on the ship to the ground, i would have the guts to do what he did and make sure she would be okay.08. Do you genuinely want your muse to be happy? What do you think would make them most happy in life?honestly i prefer writing bellamy as angsty as possible but of course i want him to be happy. there is nothing better than the rare times in the show he gets to experience it. i think the thing that would make him most happy would for the wars to be over, and earth to be livable. to be able to not have to worry about his friends and sister’s life being in peril. i dont think he’d ever get over the guilt he feels but i think him falling in love (kinda like with gina) he would lowly begin to forget about it, and the weight lifted from his shoulders would also be pretty great for him.09. Do you enjoy putting your muse through angst? What do you think would break their heart the most?lol, go to question 08. i do really like putting him through angst and i think it just might be how fun it is to explore his mind during the process. there are many things that could break his heart. witnessing the death of any of his friends but the thing that would break his heart the most would be the death of his sister. it kinda reminds me of the hunger games where (spoilers?) the whole point of the first two books were to save her little sister and then in the end she dies anyways. i think the feeling not only of loss but of being useless, failing at saving her would break him. you get a glimpse of it in the show but yeah. my sister, my responsibility and i failed. 10. What do you love about your muse?pretty much everything. hes adorable, his personality, the odd times he makes jokes, the way he hugs people like it could be (and sometimes is) the last time. his freckles, the way he sniffs when he feels emotions. how hes not ashamed to cry (or just too emotional to care), how sassy he was in season 1, the amazing amount of character development he has. just endless things. he legit genuinely cares about everyone.11. What do you hate about your muse?honestly the only thing i don’t like about him was his stupid greased back hair in the first episode lmao. nothing else that i would dislike enough to say i hate it.12. What about your muse amuses you?“taking a walk in the forest, princess?” his little snarky comments, his smirks, the way he was with gina, when in the first episode of season 3 and everyone is singing in the jeep he makes that cute little smile.13. What about your muse makes you sad?WHEN HE CRIES, WHEN OCTAVIA BEATS HIM UP, WHEN CLARKE LEAVES HIM AND THEN REPETITIVELY TELLS HIM SHES STAYING IN POLIS, WHEN HE THINKS OCTAVIA IS DEAD, WHEN HE’S TORTURED IN MOUNT WEATHER. etc, etc.14. How would you describe your muse to someone about to meet them, in person, for the first time?his bark is worse than his bite /whispers/ he’s a smol bean15. Would you like your muse as a person if you met them in real life?i think i’d be too intimidated to meet them, i would obviously want to be his friend but i think i’d rather be bob morely’s friend instead (less troubled …from what i know anyways)16. In what ways are you better than your muse? In what ways are they better than you?uhm. im not a killer?? he’s better at using a gun, more fit, cuter, overall probably a better person than me.17. Why do you think you connect to your muse?bellamy isn’t the first angsty broken boy i’ve written about, i’ve written as loki, jem carstairs, personal oc’s, jace herondale. i have a thing for diving into the mind of sad troubled boys lol. it comes easily to me, idk why just does.18. What aspect of your muse’s personality is most important to you? What aspect of your muse’s personality do you think is most important to them? Is it the same? Why or why not?i admire his ability to hold onto guilt. i think the most important part of his personality is tbh he actually forgives people really quickly or at least people he cares about. he forgave murphy, forgave clarke, etc (except kane lol forgot about that) but yeah. as for him i think he thinks his most important aspect would be his desire to always try to do the right thing, (after his selfishness in season 1). everything he does is either for his sister or for his people and even if it may be wrong morally he really wishes to believe what he’s doing is right.19. If you had to judge your muse and sentence them to a “fair” fate, what would your judgement be? Would you punish them? Reward them? How?honestly he’s suffered enough for his wrongs. the guilt he feels is punishment enough. the death of his friends around him, loved ones, his people, etc. obviously he deserves better than the fate he has in the show but i wouldn’t be able to just reward him when i say i think they should have a peaceful life on earth lol.

[2-d-ents]

1-100 >:)

DAMN WEL THANK U OMG this is going under a read more after some bc damn this is a lot i love u thank u

1. the meaning behind my url

2d! stuart pot! 2 dents in his wee head!

2. a picture of me

the face behind the mask of tons of pics of 2d and noodle

3. how many tattoos i have and what they are:

none :( my parents wont help me pay for college if i get any facial piercings or tattoos, so i’m being patient. i’ve got a jar full of coins that i’ll some day exchange for money and use that for tattoo funds!

4. last time i cried and why

yesterday night after telling my dad i can’t come up with the money in time to pay my medical bill lol

5. piercings i have

just my ears i’m so boring lol

6. favorite band

i really like the band SALES, they are very calming. but i also like gorillaz (obviously), lullatone, K.I.D, best coast, the smiths, and the velvet underground

7. biggest turn offs

shoes???? this sounds stupid and idk why i do this but i dislike wearing tennis shoes on the daily. on a lighter and more understandable note i dislike people who are full of themselves even in the slightest? confidence is like really important and is completely different that conceitedness.

8. top 5 (insert subject)

i’m doing gorillaz songs bc why not.

 faust 

slow country

out of body

el manana

on melancholy hill

9. tattoos i want

already answered!

10. biggest turn ons

LEGS. like nice legs. idk what kind they are (short, skinny, plumpy, long) they are just GOOD u know u look at them and ur like GOOD. they are just aesthetically pleasing sometimes i guess more of like nice for the eye than a turn on. i like choking. ngl.

11. age

i’m 19, 20 in february next year!

12. ideas for a perfect date

planning one now actually! in october i have my one year with my boyfriend so we’re going to rent a hotel in chicago and go around the city for shopping, museums, and plays!

13. life goal

already answered!

14. piercings i want

MY SEPTUM

15. relationship status

dating a really weird hippie kinda dude named jacob lol

16. favorite movie

already answered!

17. a fact about my life

i weirdly own a lot of things with stitch from lilo and stitch on them and gudetama. i told my aunt when i was like 5 that i liked stitch and for some reason in japan there is a lot of stitch stuff like notepads and water bottles. same with gudetama. she just won’t stop sending them. 

18. phobia

already answered!

19. middle name

maura. lol. my mom is mad all her kids have middle names bc japanese people don’t have them

20. height

5 foot 2. i’m sadly kinda short. 

21. are you a virgin?

nope 

22. what’s your shoe size?

women’s size 5!

23. what’s your sexual orientation?

already answered!

24. do you smoke, drink, or take any drugs?

occasionally drink beers with just my dad, not too much of a party drinker

25. someone you miss

my sorta grandma in japan who passed away recently. my real grandma died before i was born so this lady is my mom’s sister’s husband’s mom but she lived with my aunt so i saw her a lot. she like to make lots and lots of crafts and give them to me!

26. what’s one thing you regret?

spending so much money before i found out i had to pay a 400 dollar medical bill lol

27. first celebrity you think of when someone says attractive

already answered!

28. favorite ice cream?

already answered!

29. one insecurity

my thighs :(

30. what my last text message says

“then stop textin bihhh!!!” to my sister when she said “stop distracting me”

31. have you ever taken a picture naked?

no, but someone has taken a picture of me naked lol

32. have you ever pained your room?

not myself no :(

33. have you ever kissed a member of the same sex?

yes!

34. have you ever slept naked?

only after sex so like, napping

35. have you ever danced in front of your mirror?

all the time omg all the time

36. have you ever had a crush?

duh? i am dating boy

37. have you ever been dumped?

like once or twice, i doubt three times.

38. have you ever stole money from a friend?

i think accidentally once? she left 20 in my car and i thought it was mine but i’m pretty sure thinking back on it it was hers but i hate her now so yeah that 20 got spent on a good trip to the cinema

39. have you ever gotten in a car with people you just met?

too many times this month to count

40. have you ever been in a fist fight?

thank god no. i would lose so fast

41. have you ever snuck out of your house?

surprisingly no? my parents never ask where i’m going and never really have all my life. i would walk to taco bell in middle school at like three in the morning at times and in the morning they would be like “oi how was the quesadilla” 

42. have you ever had feelings for someone who didn’t have them back?

now what kind of person would i be if i went through 13 years of general schooling and didn’t have an unrequited love?

43. have you ever been arrested?

nope! never plan to be lol

44. have you ever made out with a stranger?

NOPE NEVER WANT TO

45. have you ever met up with a member of the opposite sex somewhere?

this is a vague question that i feel is meant to be like shocking. yeah, i met up with me boyfriend at subway earlier does that answer the question

46. have you ever left your house without telling your parents?

like. every single day lol they don’t seem to care

47. have you ever had a crush on your neighbor?

nah all my neighbors are antisocial

48. have you ever ditched school to do something more fun?

in senior year i left school in the first hour to drive to canada and drink the day away with friends 

49. have you ever slept in the same back with a member of the same sex?

another question that’s meant to be shocking. i slept in my sisters bed last night

50. have you ever seen someone die?

no but does a cat count 

51. have you ever been on a plane?

too many times

52. have you ever kissed a picture?

i swear i have but i can’t recall of when or of what

53. have you ever slept until 3?

yeah, even 5

54. do you love someone or miss someone right now?

my boyfriend i suppose? i’m used to technically living together and sleeping in the same bed every night so yeah i miss him right now

55. have you ever laid on your back and watched cloud shapes go by?

it’s a game called “find the dick in the sky”

56. have you ever made a snow angel?

when i was really young i only remember bc we have pictures

57. have you ever played dress up?

i was a tom boy when i was younger so no

58. have you ever cheated while playing a game

THIS MAKES ME FEEL GUILTY WHO HASNT

59. have you ever been lonely?

what kind of question is this of course i have felt a basic human emotion

60. have you ever fall asleep at school/work?

only at school never at work

61. have you ever been to a club?

no, i don’t really party

62. have you ever felt an earthquake?

yeah, living in japan makes you like never worry about them lol

63. have you ever touched a snake?

get that away from me its cute to look at but no way

64. have you ever run a read light?

only by accident

65. have you ever been suspended from school?

almost once but no

66. have you ever had detention?

saturday detention for dress code once

67. have you ever been in a car accident?

only when others are driving

68. have you ever hated the way you look?

all the time?

69. have you ever witnessed a crime?

i used to sit on the arm of my dad’s computer chair while he used to burn dvds we rented

70. have you ever pole danced?

ONCE there was one in my friends apartment and i gave it a whirl i love it

71. have you ever been lost?

my sister hates relying on technology so once it took us an hour and a half to get home from something that was only 20 minutes away

72. have you ever been to the opposite side of the country?

yep! went to nevada and arizona once. 

73. have you ever felt like dying?

can we not lol but yeah

74. have you ever cried yourself to sleep?

what teenage girl doesn’t

75. have you ever sang karaoke?

its a big thing in japan so definitely!

76. have you ever done something you told yourself you wouldnt?

duhhhhh one of those things was to never have sex

77. have you ever laughed until something came out of your nose?

yeah its uncomfortable dont do it

78. have you ever slept with someone 5 years older or younger?

no no no no ew

79. have you ever kissed in the rain?

yeah! not too special there are better places to kiss.

80. have you ever sang in the shower?

i used to a lot, never anymore

81. have you ever made out in a park?

no :(

82. have you ever dreamed you married someone?

ugh i hate those dreams so much

83. have you ever glued your hand to something?

yes :(

84. have you ever got your tongue stuck to a flagpole?

nope! that’s gross!

85. have you ever gone to school partially naked?

is this a crack at dress code lmao

86. have you ever been a cheerleader?

nope and im ok with it

87. have you ever sat on a rooftop?

when i was little my pal let us climb on her roof and was like “i do it all the time”!!1 and then someone called the cops on us

88. have you ever brush your teeth?

what

89. have you ever been too scared to watch a scary movie alone?

every single one? i am a wuss

90. have you ever played chicken?

YEAH THAT WAS MY CHILDHOOD

91. have you ever been pushed into a pool with all your clothes on?

no and good because that means people are considerate about your phone being on you lol

92. have you ever been told you’re hot by a complete stranger?

one time outside a mac demarco concert a pimp would actually not leave me alone and kept asking me to become one of his girls so i guess so? his name was papa schoolboy and he made me take pictures with him on my phone

93. have you ever broken a bone?

NO AND I NEVER WANT TO

94. have you ever been easily amused?

… all the time?

95. have you ever laughed so hard you cried?

yes

96. have you ever mooned/flashed someone?

only my friends mom because she flashed me

97. have you ever cheated on at test?

in high school yes

98. have you ever forgotten someone’s name?

okay who doesnt wtf

99. have you ever met someone who didn’t seem real?

mac demarco

100. give us one thing about you no one knows

but if i give it someone knows

[smokeblooded-blog1]

REALLY LONG  CHARACTER  SURVEY.  RULES.  repost ,   don’t  reblog  !    tag  10  ! good  luck  !  TAGGED.  i took it from myself bc i was bored  TAGGING. spiritmiinded, soughtdawn, clandestinesque, spyblooded, starveincd, pastryblooded, and anyone else who wants to do it who hasnt already

BASICS.

FULL  NAME :  jean otus NICKNAME :  the cigarette peddler / receiver depending on the translation, the cigaretter receiver jean AGE :  thirty BIRTHDAY :  unknown ETHNIC  GROUP :  white NATIONALITY :  german (? subject to change) LANGUAGE / S : english, japanese, german SEXUAL  ORIENTATION :  bisexual ROMANTIC  ORIENTATION : biromantic RELATIONSHIP  STATUS :  verse dependent, canonically single HOME  TOWN / AREA :  born in the Bādon district of the country (at the beak of the bird) CURRENT  HOME : he currently still lives in Bādon in a large apartment complex (he lives on the top floor, but only because he and his sister manage the building) PROFESSION :  second in command at the ACCA inspections department

PHYSICAL.

SKIN : fair skin that is scarless for the most part, no acne or notable blemishes except for some small birthmarks of no particular shape on his lower back EYES:  sky blue; the perfect blue color. they are often shaped in a tired, disinterested look of a poker face, but when smiling the softness is shown through them the most. more emotion can be seen through jean’s eyes than any other feature on him FACE :  his face is rather long for the most part, not a baby face in any form, but it doesnt look scrawny or make him look sickly either. he has a longer nose as well that is more lengthy on the bridge than the point itself LIPS :   arent particularly special. theyre not too thick, not too thin, and they are often in a straight line / resting. they dont get chapped often because he drinks enough to keep them hydrated and they are not bitten or chewed at in any form. when smiling, small dimples (barely noticiable) come on his cheeks  COMPLEXION : isnt anything particularly special. its not like he keeps his skin flawless (he has no particular interest in that), but jean is one of the lucky ones who is blessed to not have much acne. he cleans his face in the shower / when its dirty, but with that taken out of the picture, jean doesnt participate in washing it to the excess. its just naturally free of acne and other blemishes. he doesnt get red faced either, nor does he (or would he) wear makeup to cover it up BLEMISHES : besides the small birthmarks on his lower back, he doesn’t have any SCARS :  none TATTOOS :  none HEIGHT :  177.5cm / 5′10″ WEIGHT :  72.57kg / 160lbs BUILD :  has muscle, but nothing extraordinary. his strongest muscle point is in his wide / broad shoulders, but the rest of body just has lean muscle. he appears rather thin, so you wouldnt be able to tell he had much muscle unless stripping him down / seeing him shirtless / etc. he has a flat stomach, but there isnt much developed muscle through his stomach. the abs are there, but nothing noticable, really FEATURES :  nothing particularly notable ALLERGIES : bee stings. there arent many bees in Bādon, but when jean travels to other districts he often has to bring medicine with him just in case he does get stung USUAL  HAIR  STYLE :  golden hair with an undercut underneath a near-bowl hair style USUAL  FACE  LOOK :  he typically is expressed with a poker face. jean doesnt smile often, or really show many other expressions for that matter, but all of his expressions are vibrant (but short lasting). his smile comes out a lot when hes drunk USUAL  CLOTHING : typically hes seen wearing his ACCA uniform, with or without the jacket 

PSYCHOLOGY.

FEAR / S :  losing the people hes close to (i.e lotta and niino for the most part) ASPIRATION / S :  completing his work every day, leaving ACCA somewhere down the line, finding niino (post ep8) POSITIVE  TRAITS :  adaptable, calm, candid, capable, compassion, determined, easygoing, empathetic, faithful, friendly (though it sometimes seems otherwise), honest, open-minded, punctual, etc NEGATIVE  TRAITS :  absent-minded, bored (sometimes), distracted, dull (before getting to know him), oblivious, etc MBTI : DEFENDER (ISFJ-A) ZODIAC : virgo (subject to change) TEMPEREMENT :  phlegmatic SOUL  TYPE / S :  the helper ANIMALS :  mouse VICE  HABIT / S :  SMOKING FAITH :  christian (however, he is not very spiritual. religion does not matter much in his life, he just has his basic beliefs in the entity itself) GHOSTS ? :  yes, but not a strong belief AFTERLIFE ? :  yes REINCARNATION ? : probably not ALIENS ? :  yeah he would POLITICAL  ALIGNMENT :  ACCA EDUCATION  LEVEL :  high school graduate

FAMILY.

FATHER :  a poor man prior to managing an apartment complex (the one that was passed to jean and lotta after his death) that does not have much known about him. jean doesnt talk about him much because of his higher fondness towards his mother, but his father was not a particularly bad man. currently deceased from a train wreck MOTHER :  a woman who was formerly the second princess of Dowa, but was removed from the royal roster for the sake of the country. she kept this to herself, even her husband and children when she met them / they were born, because she had faked her death to become a commoner on the streets. currently deceased from a train wreck SIBLINGS :  lotta otus, approximately eighteen to twenty years old, is the younger sibling of jean. she has a striking resemblance to her mother, as jean notes, and currently lives with him in their shared apartment on the top floor. has a love for bread, pasteries, and just food in general really. she and jean are quite close to one another EXTENDED  FAMILY :  king falke II (jean’s grandfather, the current king in power), prince schwan (cousin), other royal family members NAME  MEANING / S :  jean’s first name in hebrew quite literally means “gift from God” while otus means “keen of hearing” in Greek HISTORICAL  CONNECTION ? :  historically speaking, jean is of a royal family bloodline. he does not know this for most of his life, nor does he care about it once he finds out that he is apart of it. he would have been the next king in line instead of schwan if not for his mother being removed off of the roster, but his bloodline is still all the more royal

FAVORITES.

BOOK :  he hasnt read a book unrelated to work in some time, so he doesnt really have one MOVIE :  see above 5  SONGS :  jean listens to a lot of untitled instrumentals, mostly because it appeals to him. he will listen to other things on and off, but his favorite thing is typing in something along the lines of “relaxing music” in the search bar and clicking one of the 8 hour videos and just letting it play. he doesnt need to know the tracks, theyre good enough for him like this DEITY :  speaking as hes christian, god / jesus obv HOLIDAY : christmas MONTH :  he doesnt have one SEASON : spring. jean likes things to be mild and, despite how flimsy spring can be, he doesnt mind it too much. he likes when its not too hot, not too cold, but doesnt like it to be as chilled and rainy as it can be in fall. spring brings about rain as well, but not nearly as often as fall does, so this is a higher preference for him PLACE : at the bar / anywhere with niino, at home / anywhere with lotta, a bakery, the roof of the apartment complex WEATHER :  he likes sun, but he doesnt like when its too hot. it has to be like, mild, because if its too hot then its uncomfortable for him. he likes when its breezy as well but, like previously said, not too much. just enough so that it isnt chilly SOUND :  niino / lotta’s laugh, a gentle breeze blowing, rain SCENT / S :  strawberry, cigarette smoke, baking bread, faint cologne scents (i e: a specific brand that niino wears), warm food cooking TASTE / S :  strawberries, tobacco, bread (specifically tough bread) FEEL / S :  the cigarette between his fingers, people he trusts rubbing his back, people he trusts petting his hair, silk ANIMAL / S :  cats NUMBER :  he doesnt have one COLORS :  blue

EXTRA.

TALENTS :  figuring out when someone is lying to him (for the most part), investigating BAD  AT :  getting close to people, expressing his emotions in a way that isnt just deadpan / poker faced, cooking, holding his liquor, dealing with social events (he isnt anxious, he just doesnt like being at them that much) TURN  ONS :  body worship (receiving), care, confidence, dirty talk, minimal marks, praise, soft biting (more to be added most likely) TURN  OFFS :  being too rough (he likes it softer, more making love-esque), having to beg too much, too much teasing (a little is okay) (more to be added most likely) HOBBIES :   drinking with niino, smoking (is this considered a hobby? idk), listening to music, going to bakeries TROPES :  “Royal blood”, “Smoking is cool”, etc QUOTES :  “I never noticed I had an observer you’d assigned to me. But he isn’t a straightforward guy.” (to Grossular, about Niino) || “I smell tobbaco on you.” || “I try not to think of my subordinates as exceptional. After all, doubting them is my job.” (to Eider)

MUN QUESTIONS.

Q1 :   if  you  could  write  your  character  your  way  in  their  own  movie ,   what  would  it  be  called ,  what  style  would  it  be  filmed  in ,  and  what  would  it  be  about ?           A1 :   what does ??????? this question even mean asldkfj Q2 :   what  would  their  soundtrack / score  sound  like ?           A2 :   itd probably be a lot of soft music. nothing super upbeat like pop and nothing like rock either. itd be maybe soft indie music, instrumentals, stuff like that Q3 :   why  did  you  start  writing  this  character ?           A3 :   you know, i honestly wasnt going to write any muse from this fandom? i figured the rp part of it would be dead after i couldnt find anyone after some time, but a few of my friends got wound up with the show after i talked about it so much and after they decided to make blogs, i made the decision to join them. even though i dont get that many interactions and this blog is still extremely new, i love being on jean. hes a really good character and im glad my friends convinced me to write him Q4 :   what  first  attracted  you  to  this  character ?           A4 :   honestly, it didnt come immediately. i never disliked jean, but i thought he was rather plain at first, which is to be understandable when you know how he is. i didnt think there was anything striking about him at all and i was more attracted to niino (i still am attracted to / love niino). that said, jean started to come to live more as the anime progressed and i found that hes really just a sweet bean and is VERY cute and i love him so so much. i think it was episode 3 when he was blushing / being precious and adorable while drunk that really got me getting gay for him Q5 :   describe  the  biggest  thing  you  dislike  about  your  muse.           A5 :  definitely the fact that he smokes. i dont hate people because they smoke, but i have an extreme aversion to smoking due to the fact that i not only have asthma and its very bad for me to be around, but because of the fact that it smells awful Q6 :   what  do  you  have  in  common  with  your  muse ?           A6 :  mmm, i think we’re similar in the fact that we’re pretty introverted and / or reserved and we like being away from social events and such Q7 :   how  does  your  muse  feel  about  you ?           A7 :   i hope he likes me. i love him so Q8 :   what  characters  does  your  muse  have  interesting  interactions  with ?         A8 :   honestly ? all of the interactions on my blog so far are great. my niino spyblooded and i already have like a kajillion threads and he loves their niino so so much <3. clandestinesque and i have an interesting thread and im not quite sure where we’re going to go with it but ive enjoyed it so far !!. spiritmiinded / astrallance and i also have good interactions too. we had great ones when i was still on keith too and im super happy that im still writing with them over here :’) Q9 :   what  gives  you  inspiration  to  write  your  muse ?         A9 :   i  dont really get inspiration, im just kinda here, writing because i enjoy it lmfao Q10 :   how  long  did  this  take  you  to  complete ?           A10 :   idk exactly but 2-3 hours probably ? longer than it took me to complete keiths i know that

[investmart007]

NEW YORK | $30,000 rumor? Tabloid paid for, spiked, salacious Trump tip

New Post has been published on https://goo.gl/WjKcoR

NEW YORK | $30,000 rumor? Tabloid paid for, spiked, salacious Trump tip

NEW YORK | April 11, 2018 (AP)(STL.News) Eight months before the company that owns the National Enquirer paid $150,000 to a former Playboy Playmate who claimed she’d had an affair with Donald Trump, the tabloid’s parent made a $30,000 payment to a less famous individual: a former doorman at one of the real estate mogul’s New York City buildings.

As it did with the ex-Playmate, the Enquirer signed the ex-doorman to a contract that effectively prevented him from going public with a juicy tale that might hurt Trump’s campaign for president.

The payout to the former Playmate, Karen McDougal, stayed a secret until the Wall Street Journal published a story about it days before Election Day. Since then curiosity about that deal has spawned intense media coverage and, this week, helped prompt the FBI to raid the hotel room and offices of Trump’s personal lawyer, Michael Cohen.

The story of the ex-doorman, Dino Sajudin, hasn’t been told until now.

The Associated Press confirmed the details of the Enquirer’s payment through a review of a confidential contract and interviews with dozens of current and former employees of the Enquirer and its parent company, American Media Inc. Sajudin got $30,000 in exchange for signing over the rights, “in perpetuity,” to a rumor he’d heard about Trump’s sex life — that the president had fathered an illegitimate child with an employee at Trump World Tower, a skyscraper he owns near the United Nations. The contract subjected Sajudin to a $1 million penalty if he disclosed either the rumor or the terms of the deal to anyone.

Cohen, the longtime Trump attorney, acknowledged to the AP that he had discussed Sajudin’s story with the magazine when the tabloid was working on it. He said he was acting as a Trump spokesman when he did so and denied knowing anything beforehand about the Enquirer payment to the ex-doorman.

The parallel between the ex-Playmate’s and the ex-doorman’s dealings with the Enquirer raises new questions about the roles that the Enquirer and Cohen may have played in protecting Trump’s image during a hard-fought presidential election. Prosecutors are probing whether Cohen broke banking or campaign laws in connection with AMI’s payment to McDougal and a $130,000 payment to porn star Stormy Daniels that Cohen said he paid out of his own pocket.

Federal investigators have sought communications between Cohen, American Media’s chief executive and the Enquirer’s top editor, the New York Times reported.

Cohen’s lawyer has called the raids “inappropriate and unnecessary.” American Media hasn’t said whether federal authorities have sought information from it, but said this week that it would “comply with any and all requests that do not jeopardize or violate its protected sources or materials pursuant to our First Amendment rights.” The White House didn’t respond to questions seeking comment.

On Wednesday, an Enquirer sister publication, RadarOnline, published details of the payment and the rumor that Sajudin was peddling. The website wrote that the Enquirer spent four weeks reporting the story but ultimately decided it wasn’t true.  The company only released Sajudin from his contract after the 2016 election amid inquiries from the Journal about the payment. The site noted that the AP was among a group of publications that had been investigating the ex-doorman’s tip.

During AP’s reporting, AMI threatened legal action over reporters’ efforts to interview current and former employees and hired the New York law firm Boies Schiller Flexner, which challenged the accuracy of the AP’s reporting.

Asked about the payment last summer, Dylan Howard, the Enquirer’s top editor and an AMI executive, said he made the payment to secure the former Trump doorman’s exclusive cooperation because the tip, if true, would have sold “hundreds of thousands” of magazines. Ultimately, he said the information “lacked any credibility,” so he spiked the story on those merits.

“Unfortunately…Dino Sajudin is one fish that swam away,” Howard told RadarOnline on Wednesday.

But four longtime Enquirer staffers directly familiar with the episode challenged Howard’s version of events. They said they were ordered by top editors to stop pursuing the story before completing potentially promising reporting threads.

They said the publication didn’t pursue standard Enquirer reporting practices, such as exhaustive stake-outs or tabloid tactics designed to prove paternity. In 2008, the Enquirer helped bring down presidential hopeful John Edwards in part by digging through a dumpster and retrieving material to do a DNA test that indicated he had fathered a child with a mistress, according to a former staffer.

The woman at the center of the rumor about Trump denied emphatically to the AP last August that she’d ever had an affair with Trump, saying she had no idea the Enquirer had paid Sajudin and pursued his tip.

The AP has not been able to determine if the rumor is true and is not naming the woman.

“This is all fake,” she said. “I think they lost their money.”

The Enquirer staffers, all with years of experience negotiating source contracts, said the abrupt end to reporting combined with a binding, seven-figure penalty to stop the tipster from talking to anyone led them to conclude that this was a so-called “catch and kill” — a tabloid practice in which a publication pays for a story to never run, either as a favor to the celebrity subject of the tip or as leverage over that person.

One former Enquirer reporter, who was not involved in the Sajudin reporting effort, expressed skepticism that the company would pay for the tip and not publish.

“AMI doesn’t go around cutting checks for $30,000 and then not using the information,” said Jerry George, a reporter and senior editor for nearly three decades at AMI before his layoff in 2013.

The company said that AMI’s publisher, David Pecker, an unabashed Trump supporter, had not coordinated its coverage with Trump associates or taken direction from Trump. It acknowledged discussing the former doorman’s tip with Trump’s representatives, which it described as “standard operating procedure in stories of this nature.”

The Enquirer staffers, like many of the dozens of other current and former AMI employees interviewed by the AP in the past year, spoke on condition of anonymity. All said AMI required them to sign nondisclosure agreements barring them from discussing internal editorial policy and decision-making.

Though sometimes dismissed by mainstream publications, the Enquirer’s history of breaking legitimate scoops about politicians’ personal lives — including its months-long Pulitzer Prize-contending coverage of presidential candidate Edwards’ affair — is a point of pride in its newsroom.

During the 2016 presidential campaign, the Enquirer published a string of allegations against Trump’s rivals, such as stories claiming Democratic rival Hillary Clinton was a bisexual “secret sex freak” and was kept alive only by a “narcotics cocktail.”

Stories attacking Trump rivals or promoting Trump’s campaign often bypassed the paper’s normal fact-checking process, according to two people familiar with campaign-era copy.

The tabloid made its first-ever endorsement by officially backing Trump for the White House. With just over a week before Election Day, Howard, the top editor, appeared on Alex Jones’ InfoWars program by phone, telling listeners that the choice at the ballot box was between “the Clinton crime family” or someone who will “break down the borders of the establishment.” Howard said the paper’s coverage was bipartisan, citing negative stories it published about Ben Carson during the Republican presidential primaries.

In a statement last summer, Howard said the company doesn’t take editorial direction “from anyone outside AMI,” and said Trump has never been an Enquirer source. The company has said reader surveys dictate its coverage and that many of its customers are Trump supporters.

The company has said it paid McDougal, the former Playboy Playmate, to be a columnist for an AMI-published fitness magazine, not to stay silent. McDougal has since said that she regrets signing the non-disclosure agreement and is currently suing to get out of it.

Pecker has denied burying negative stories about Trump, but acknowledged to the New Yorker last summer that McDougal’s contract had effectively silenced her.

“Once she’s part of the company, then on the outside she can’t be bashing Trump and American Media,” Pecker said.

In the tabloid world purchasing information is not uncommon, and the Enquirer routinely pays sources. As a general practice, however, sources agree to be paid for their tips only upon publication.

George, the longtime former reporter and editor, said the $1 million penalty in Sajudin’s agreement was larger than anything he had seen in his Enquirer career.

“If your intent is to get a story from the source, there’s no upside to paying upfront,” said George, who sometimes handled catch-and-kill contracts related to other celebrities. Paying upfront was not the Enquirer’s usual practice because it would have been costly and endangered the source’s incentive to cooperate, he said.

After initially calling the Enquirer’s tip line, Sajudin signed a boilerplate contract with the Enquirer, agreeing to be an anonymous source and be paid upon publication. The Enquirer dispatched reporters to pursue the story both in New York and in California. The tabloid also sent a polygraph expert to administer a lie detection test to Sajudin in a hotel near his Pennsylvania home.

Sajudin passed the polygraph, which tested how he learned of the rumor. One week later, Sajudin signed an amended agreement, this one paying him $30,000 immediately and subjecting him to the $1 million penalty if he shopped around his information.

The Enquirer immediately then stopped reporting, said the former staffers.

Cohen, last year, characterized the Enquirer’s payment to Sajudin as wasted money for a baseless story.

For his part, Sajudin confirmed he’d been paid to be the tabloid’s anonymous source but insisted he would sue the Enquirer if his name appeared in print. Pressed for more details about his tip and experience with the paper, Sajudin said he would talk only for in exchange for payment.

“If there’s no money involved with it,” he said, “I’m not getting involved.”

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By JAKE PEARSON and JEFF HORWITZ,By Associated Press – published on STL.News by St. Louis Media, LLC (Z.S)

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