#(not just the muses i left behind on the blogs i put on hiatus)

[theha1r]

shutting up w the ooc yapping after this fr but ... what if i said i love my other blogs, like i wouldn't have maya & the halloween bbies on tumblr if i didn't want them here, but i also just constantly wanna be on steve's blog & nowhere else even if i do enjoy myself when i am writing on those blogs & i wouldn't like the starter calls & write the starters & shit if i didn't want to write those muses/make connections & all

i just - idk i just wanna be on steve all the fucking time but i still love those muses too -

[oldestking]

Sometimes I ponder the idea of going back to a single blog, like,, not in the sense of leaving my currently active multi behind, or Gil behind, but like, that craving of having a new muse, that has their own space,, it feel like I haven't have that in some time already (and to those who know me, it's nothing unusual to find 844738382 blogs following u which are all mine OTJRPRJTRK)

[rightsockjin]

Timbs part 2

Hello beautiful people! Merry Christmas and Happy holidays! Since this blog has grown so much even during the time of our temporary hiatus, and this story (Timbs from the dynamite series) continues to get attention, I thought that I'd listen and write a part two! Happy Christmas Y'all! Also, I do want to address some stuff that is in this pic. First off, as a group, the writers at right sock decided to give each member of BTS a permanent girlfriend. So basically, nicknames which will make it easier to refer to other girls. This is the first real place you will see that. Y/N is nicknamed Bunny in this. But Y/N is used as well. Just incase it confused you.

Anyway! On to what we all came here for!

Summary: After your last encounter with your best friend and the words exchanged, you aren't sure where you stand... but maybe you should focus on where you lay...

Rating: M! Big M!

Genre: Smut, angst, fluff. All the good stories are hehe.

word count: Drum roll please....7,378!

Warnings: Stalking, being eaten out, mentions of blowjobs, kink talk. someone walks in during the deed....kinda. Jealousy. General meanness. Naked people y'all. nipple stuff. I think that’s all??

Part one

Master list

He closed the door behind him. It thudded thickly in the small apartment of his that you frequented. It was in the same state as you had seen it the last time you had been over. Boxes were still packed, dust covered the old furniture, save for the couch that had been a combined gift from all of his friends as he was the last to move out, that had come with the appartnemnt appartment, and heaps of bubble wrap and packing peanuts littered the floor. You crossed your arms and rolled your eyes.

Your nose itched and you could feel a sneeze coming on. With a slight shake of your head, you looked over your shoulder and gave your best friend the look. Eyebrows slightly raised at the center, a light smile teased your nude, mint chapstick coated lips. A hint of incredulity mixed with “really?” and some other emotion that you tried to snuff out completely. Something akin to fondness perhaps?

Jungkook had his black shirt covered back to you. His hair was grazing his lower ears and lightly ruffled as he turned to look at you after checking that the door had indeed locked as he forgot to lock his door constantly which made no sense because it was an automatic lock, but somehow, he had already gotten people accidentally walking in on him in less than opportune moments. Namely, this girl who lived near by was always accidentally walking into his apartment thinking it was hers, but you surmised that she couldn’t possibly be that stupid and was coming in purly because she thought Jungkook was cute and single.

You knew this because one time, you had been over and she “accidentally” walked in while Jungkook was in the restroom with a cute little confused face on which fell as soon as she saw you lounging on the couch eating a particularly stringy mango. She stumbled through an awkward apology before quickly closing the door and going to her actual apartment.

But Jungkook was convinced that she was just very lost and very new to the building. You couldn’t bear to break it to him. Or maybe you didn’t want him to realize that she most likely had a crush on him. A creepy, stalkery crush… maybe you should tell him...

Jungkook’s mask sat slightly under his nose. His eyes widened when he noticed you staring, completely zoned out from your light flashback. He blinked in confusion, frozen for a second before he slowly crossed his arms and raised his own eyebrows at you.

You shook your head and scrunched your eyebrows at him then. Your hands held up in question. A stance that clearly said “what are you looking at me like that for? I’m the one judging you here.”

Again, with mirth in his eyes and his nose scrunched slightly, signaling that he was smiling under his face cover, he mimicked your stance. He leaned down slightly to get on your level. His mistake. You would think he’d learn by now.

You smacked the side of his head lightly enough that you were sure it didn’t hurt but also hard enough to get him out of this weird theater mirror exercise thing he was doing.

“Ow? What the fuck, Bunny,” he questioned, closing one eye tightly and rubbing the spot on his head you had tapped as if you had bruised him.

You rolled your eyes but reached up and patted his head lightly before giving his hair a small scratch that you knew he loved as an apology. Without fail, he smiled down at you with squinty eyes and a scrunched nose. The fondness in his eyes reached your own body. A sense of calmness. Your body relaxed.

You made to remove your hand from his hair, but he put his own hand over yours, begging you to keep it on his head for a second longer. You complied, only because you liked to mess with his hair almost as much as he liked for you to mess with it.

Jungkook ripped his mask off as you mused his hair gently. His breathing slowed and he let himself take yet another step closer to you. The scent of sweet pea flowers danced around him like a lullaby.

He was tired. He hadn’t realized he was tired until that very moment, since your outing hadn’t really been something to tire him out. He was usually fairly energetic around you and lunch was hardly an activity that would make him feel tired, but now, a nap was sounding really nice. He wondered if you would nap with him if he asked.

But then your hand was off his head and you were stepping away and the peace was lifted. He snapped his eyes open, a pretty pout decorated his pink lips which went ignored by you.

“You should really unpack all this stuff Kookie. The dust is really obnoxious.”

And then you rubbed the underside of your nose and sniffed aggressively. Jesus, how were you this...breathtaking? He felt the emotion building in his chest. It compressed into his ribs and pressed on all his organs. It grew bigger and bigger until it felt like he would explode. Almost like the weeks before when you had your head between his legs with your saliva dribbled down his cock and onto his-

AACHOOoo!

Jungkook was nearly knocked off his feet with the force of his sneeze. Instantly, the pressure in his chest loosened a bit but not entirely. Not enough. He blinked down at his body, feeling betrayed.

He could already feel his nice slacks starting to squeeze around his middle. He could only stand there in shock as he watched blood flow to his third leg. He had really thought that he had gotten past the phase of his crush on you where every little thing you did turned him on.

But then again, sucking him off while he fingered you in a barely lit room wasn’t exactly a little thing. It was huge. And he wasn’t just talking about his dick.

If he was a braver man, he would have made something of that first encounter. Maybe asked you where you stood. Maybe confessed that as much as he thought you were beautiful in every physical way, he was highly attracted to you. Just you. The you that barged into his room whenever she felt like it. The you that texted him every morning with a synopsis of your crazy dream and used the word dick as a verb, a noun and an adjective at any given point.  The you that liked to bitch at him for every little thing he did because it was out of affection.

But no. You had left that day and neither you nor him had mentioned it once while you hadn’t rejected any of his date invitations, he couldn’t muster the courage to actually ask what your relationship was. Not even in passing. He was starting to wonder if it had actually even happened or if he had imagined it, but every time he goes for his laptop and sees the dent on the edge where it hit the floor, he is forced to recall the sweet scent of flowers and your dripping center.

He had to stop that. If he kept letting his head wonder this way…

Well, he wouldn’t do anything to make you uncomfortable, which is why he hadn’t brought it up. Or that’s what he told himself.

“Well bless you,” you said with a slight giggle, “That sounded like it hurt.”

Jungkook forced his awareness away from his crotch, realizing that if he wanted you to not see it, it would be best to not draw more awareness to it himself and the limb that was awkwardly sticking to his left leg.

“A-a little. Maybe you’re right. I really should sweep this place. I just haven’t had time since i’ve been spending so much time out with you.”

You scrunch your nose at him. His cheeks were a little red, though you assumed it was from the cold outside since the tip of his nose was also a bit red. Then, he pushed his hair out of his face, you noticed that so were his ears.

Weird. He only ever got rosy ears when he was embarrassed? Well he should be. His apartment was a mess. He probably shouldn’t have even moved out. You doubted that he knew how to clean his own ass let alone do his laundry. You were going to tell him exactly that, sass locked and loaded but something- maybe it was the way his pants fit or the way that his chest protruded through his shirt or the muscles in his arms- told you to look down.

His thighs were always your favorite part of him. So strong. Rideable. How could you not when he spent so much time making sure that they were solid as a rock. You could salivate, in fact you were salivating thinking of the last time you had your mouth anywhere near those legs and his dick deep in your throat.

If you really focused, you could fool yourself into thinking that he was hard in that instant. But no. Wait. Was it? Was he?

You snapped your eyes back to your friend. Your friend that you wanted to be more than that but you refused to say so, to see that he was looking around the apartment thoughtfully.

“Why don’t you go home for today, Y/N? I should get started on-,” he cleared his throat and visibly swallowed, hoping that if he got rid of you quickly enough, then you wouldn’t have a chance to notice the log that was in his pants.

You on the other hand weren’t sure what to do. His suggestion made you do a double take. Your boundary issues had not been resolved from last time. And this was evident in what you said next.

“Gonna beat it to the last time you got a real blow job instead of asking for one or what? Small dick energy.”

And who else could that have been than you? Your brain caught up to your mouth a second too late to take anything back. The words floated out in the open like an invitation. Well, wasn’t it? Isn’t that what you had meant? Probably. Your brain tended to go that direction when it came to Jeon Jungkook but had you really just offered him a blow job?

There was a second in which Jungkook’s face steadily turned the color of a cherry tomato and he began to sweat slightly. His eyes were wide and he was looking at you like he must have misunderstood. Were you speaking the same language?

His body tensed and blood pumped predominantly to his cheeks or his nether region. He felt a little faint even. Was the room spinning? It felt like it could be.

You watched him reel and try to compose himself. This was similar to the last time you guys had partaken in activities that weren’t usually shared by platonic friends. And like that instance, you felt the urge to run. To get out before he had a chance to don his other persona. The one that makes you weak in the knees and something of a brat.

“Is that like an offer or are you being an ass?” he asked, sass dripping from his tone. He pushed both hands into his pockets, the tips of his fingers grazed his hardened rod, already sensitive despite it not being entirely hard.

You crossed your arms, not sure if you wanted him to take you up on your invitation or if you wanted to retract it.

Jungkook took a step closer to you, waiting patiently for you to find your voice. He wasn’t going to pressure you. As much as he had enjoyed it last time, he couldn’t live with himself if you did something just for his sake.

You leaned against the back of his couch, the head rest was pushed slightly against your lower back, grounding you.

“No pressure, Y/N,” he assured, suddenly feeling like the playful tone that this activity had taken on the last time may seem a little pushy if you really didn’t want to partake once again.

But this solidified in your mind that as much as he seemed turned on, he clearly had enough respect for you to make sure you really were into the situation as much as he was. This was enough to push any feelings of unease aside and focus just on what was being given.

“I mean… honestly, don’t you kind of owe me for last time? I basically did all the work and you just sat there like a rock.”

Jungkook gaped at you, he put a hand over his heart and scooted slightly closer so that there was only a foot of distance between the both of you now.

“You were the one calling the shots babe. If you wanted me to do something more than just shake that,” Perfectly sculpted and hard work evident, “ass then you should have said something.”

His vibrato dropped for a second, his eyes met yours, “I’d do anything you ask of me, Bun.”

Your heart palpitated wildily in your chest. The words he had spoken to you that night came back to you then. You dreamed of those words. Hoped he would say them again in a different setting but never had even acknowledged that it had even happened, so you were left only with dreams and foggy memories of the way your name sounded on his sweet lips and the three words that you craved to hear.

He’d probably said it in the heat of the moment. The emotions were high and your climaxes had just...well climaxed so maybe it wasn’t that he L-worded you. It was that he L-worded what had just happened.

The issue then was that you did mean them. You meant when you said that you L-worded him so the blow of your relationship staying exactly the same as it had been before, nearly made you want to cut ties with him completely out of pure embarrassment. But you couldn’t. Because he didn’t let you. Any time you didn’t answer your phone, he was at your door. Any time you avoided set dates, he’d find you. The jerk wouldn’t let you leave, and you were too weak to let him go anyway.

But then there was that sparkle of...something, in his big eyes that made him seem so genuine and willing. Subconsciously, he licked his lips and you could only imagine those same lips on you. His head between your legs.

Could you take his offer? Did you have the courage to ask for what you wanted?

“A-anything?”

Junkook’s teeth made an appearance before he chuckled lowly, “Do I make you nervous? Is- is that’s what’s going on here?” He asked, gesturing between you two with one finger. Confidence poured out of every pore.

Instantly, you scoffed. Because no. Jungkook, baby boy, bunny teeth Jeon didn’t make you nervous in the slightest. But then why did your voice get stuck in your throat? Why did your mind go blank? Why were you fidgeting incessantly?

Jungkook hissed, a laugh chimed deep in his throat, “Who would have thought that the only thing I needed to do to get you to shut up was to offer to do you? Wish I would have known this years ago! I would have offered more often.”

He crossed his arms over his chest, the muscles flexed against his shirt. Your body thirsted at the sight. What would he look like on top of you? Pinning you down?

Your eyelid felt heavy. Lust coursed through your body. If you could just speak-

“So what will it be? Want me to eat you out? Fuck you? Spank you? Or are you more of an orgasm denial type of girl? You know, if this is going to work out, we should really talk about those kinks. Maybe think of a safe word? Or are you not that kinky? Cuz I’m pretty kinky so we should definitely talk hard limits as well-”

You watched him monologue in complete shock. Did he think that this was going to be a common occurrence? No. You didn’t usually sleep with guys just for the hell of it unless you were never going to see them again, and Jungkook clearly did not fit that criteria so no. You couldn’t just casually sleep with your best friend.

You opened your mouth to tell him this when you suddenly tuned back into the conversation.

“-and I mean… I know it might have been a bit fuzzy but I’ve had fun on our dates so far so I guess it’s natural that we take this to the next level? If- If that’s okay with you! Mama always told me that a gentleman never rushes his woman. Not that you’re mine! Or like that I own you or anything like that! No, no, I just mean that I like you and well you like me and like… the dates? So we’re like together? A couple? Should we have that conversation as well? I don’t know… what do you think, Y/N?”

You blinked at him in complete shock. Had you been dating Jungkook for the last couple of weeks and hadn’t noticed?

In hindsight, he had been paying for some of your meals and while he had done this on occasion, it had become more of a regular thing. He’d also been a lot more clingy than he had been. He’d even tried holding your hand  a couple of times only for you to panic and pull away.

All of this information seemed to hit you like a ton of bricks. Oh my God… You had been dating Jungkook! How the hell did you miss that??

When you didn’t answer, combined with the horrified expression on your face that he had no way of knowing wasn’t complete disgust at the idea of him touching you, Jungkook feel like a total idiot.

To him, it seemed clear that the last thing you wanted was for his nasty hands anywhere near you. Couldn’t he take a hint? Clearly not, because you hadn’t so much as tried to kiss him on the cheek and now here he was offering to eat you. Talk about jumping some steps.

He took a step back, trying to give you some room so as not to force himself on you but he could feel his heart constrict. He was not gonna cry. He was not gonna cry. He was not gonna- oh…

Tears pooled in his pretty eyes. They burned with emotion and he really wanted nothing more than for you to leave and never speak to him again while at the same time wanting to jump into your arms and be comforted.

Regardless of his feelings, he stayed rooted to the spot he was standing in, his hands folded neatly before him as he bowed his head in a small apology.

“Oh...I uh… I overstepped. I’m so sorry, Y/N… I didn’t mean to- to make you uncomfortable.”

He balled his hands into fists trying to distract himself from the emotional pain of the blow you had dealt.

You on the other hand, were struggling to come to terms with what was happening. How did you stop this from spiraling further? And.. was he crying? No! He couldn’t be crying! You had to stop this. He may be obnoxious and a baby but he was apparently… your… obnoxious baby!

Without thinking much, you closed the distance with one big step and wormed your arms around his torso. You shimmied your head under his chin. Jungkook seized for a second. Unsure what he should do.

But as the shock wore down, he let his body relax and wrapped his strong arms around your body as he was shocked with emotion. At the end of the day, you were his best friend and if he was going to be consoled after a girl broke his heart, it would be you who would do it, even if that girl who broke his heart… was you.

But then, why were you kissing his neck softly? Was he imagining it? No. Because in the next second, you were grabbing his chin with your thumb and forefinger- they were ice cold- and you were pulling his face to look up at you.

When your eyes connected, your heart shattered. The pools of tears turned to streams in the mountains of his cheeks then conjelled at the valley between his collarbones.

Of course, on top of his good looks, he was a pretty crier. That was so unfair. Almost as unfair as the beautiful fan of eyelashes that caught his sparkling tears. And the voice that could only belong to an angel that he possessed.

You couldn’t help the slight smile that crossed your chapstick lips and the fond scrunch of your nose before you closed the three inches or so of air that divided you. When your lips settled onto his, you felt rather than saw him freeze for the third time that day.

His lips were a little salty and a little minty. Vaguely, you remember him applying and reapplying his chapstick all day. Now you wondered if he had been doing it out of nervousness.

Then his hands were in your hair, pulling you closer, balled at the nape pleasantly. He was breathing hard. Like he’d run a marathon or danced a full concert.

His lips were pressed so firmly onto yours that you were sure they would swell and bruise after this. You let all semblance of control be taken from you. One of his hands slid down to the arch of your back tentatively. Like he was scared to break you or that you would tell him to get off.

You arched your back with his hand, pressing your high necked cotton shirt into his chest. You could feel his heartbeat through the fabric of his own shirt and the muscles that covered it.

With a sigh, you opened your mouth as he opened his lips and sandwiched your top one within his own.

You could feel that he was still crying, but you weren’t exactly sure why. You could ask later. Right now, all you wanted, all you knew he needed, was for you to kiss him and make it all better. To fix whatever it is you had done. You could piece him back together if you tried hard enough.

So when he began walking you backwards towards the couch, you didn’t fight. The hand on your back moved over to your hip. His lips were connected to yours, open wide, his tongue explored the wet cavern of your mouth. Teeth clashed awkwardly, the kiss was out of sync. You let him maneuver your head whichever way he wanted with the hand that was still firmly in your hair. He leaned over you. His body seemed to completely incompace yours. Your back was arched almost forty five degrees. It wasn’t painful at all. Instead, it pushed your hips flush against his.

His member, which had shrunk significantly only seconds before, was now growing again, filling with the erotic arousal that pulsed in his veins. A hulk in disguise was being pulled from the Bruce Banner you were so used to. And you were all too eager to let him show you this side of him.

Like a man on the brink of drowning, he pulled his mouth from yours. You couldn’t bring yourself to open your eyes. In a split second, he leaned down and picked you up from the knees. You wondered if he would carry you to his room or throw you over his shoulder, but he sat you down on the back of the couch before he placed a quick peck to your lips.

Then, like the sadist he was, he pulled away again, smiling up at you through red eyes. He wasn’t sure what this meant. If this was a sign that you too were too scared to bring up the relationship and the conversation that could change everything, but that could wait for another time. Right then, all he wanted was to show you, with his tongue, with his mouth, with whatever limb you let him, that he was falling for you. Hard.

Reluctantly, you opened your eyes. A sigh escaped your lips. If you opened your eyes, would it be over? Would he ask you to leave? Would it once again go back to how it was for the last couple of weeks?

Eventually, you did open your eyes. Jungkook could see the fear and unsteadiness in them. The red around the brown made you hurt deeply in your soul. A tender hand reached out to cup his cheek. The light scratch of your freshly done nails was pleasurable to his senses. Goosebumps. Then a strong shiver. And he felt himself melt for the girl he had known for so long. And you for the man whom you had watched grow from a frightened boy.

“Are you going to touch me or are you going to punish me for all the times I left you high and dry,” you laughed. Even in this tender moment, you couldn’t hold your tongue, but Jungkook didn’t mind. The engine of his brain was whirring and he could hear, all he could see and feel, was you...you...you. Nothing but you and the way your hair hung under your chest and covered your left eye. Nothing but your chest rising and falling and the smile on your kissible, bruised lips.

How could he help himself? The answer? Would always be you.

He kissed your nose, then your cheek. An eskimo kiss. You giggled. It was the most beautiful music to his ears.

“You want me to Bunbun?” Internally, he cringed at his overly affectionate name but you smiled brighter and the insecurity left as soon as it came.

“Is that my name now?”

“If you want it to be, or you could choose another one?”

You wrapped your arms around his neck, now that you were almost level with his eyes- though now you were a bit taller than him. You shrugged.

“I like it. Bunny, Bun, BunBun, any variation.”

“Really?”

“Yeah,” you confirmed.

“Who knew you were this cheesy, Y/N?”

You rolled your eyes at him playfully as you opened your legs so he could slot himself between them. You pulled him closer and wrapped your legs around his waist. A mischievous smirk crossed your lips.

“What’s with the face,” he asked, sniffling a little.

“What face,” you asked, feigning innocence.

“This face,” he countered, gesturing vaguely at your eyes.

“Oh this? Ah well you see,” and then without ending your thought, you let yourself fall backwards with your legs and arms wrapped tightly around his frame. He was much heavier than you and clearly more muscular but with the weight distribution you were able to pull him over the back of the couch and twist both yourself and him so you landed on the cushions. His body atop yours.

By the look on his face, he clearly had not expected you to pull him, nor did he expect for his center to land directly on yours, but the shock gave way to the joy and fun that tended to encompass your everyday encounters.

His high pitched giggle of a laugh made an appearance which caused a multitude of butterflies to flutter through your intestines and chest. He relaxed into you, laying his head cautiously onto your breasts, pushing his middle away from your heated core. (yes, he noticed)

He could hear your heart beating against the- hehe squishy- lump of fat on your chest. Instantly, he knew that he could spend eons on your bosom uninhibited and satisfied.

But the pulse of his confined member made his head swirl with thoughts less than innocent.

When your nails lightly scratched at his back and the smallest, lightest moan left your lips, he knew you must be on the same page. Or at least, he hoped. Spurred on by the heavenly shapes and your inquiry from a couple seconds before, Jungkook picked his head off your chest and hovered over your left breast.

There was a question in his eyes as he looked between your boob and your face. One which you couldn’t answer verbally as your heart rate picked up and the lust poisoned your veins.

With the slightest nod, he had everything he needed to lean down and lightly nip at the mound through the thin material of your beige shirt. The warmth of his breath traversed the stitches easily. It sent pleasant shivers through your body, settling in your core.

He nibbled softly around what he hoped was your nipple, before he kissed the center of the mound with tender lips. His eyes stayed looking up at yours, searching for any signs that he should stop. You bit your lips and took a deep breath, dropping his questioning gaze and letting him take the reigns once again.

Jungkook felt you relax into him. Relief flooded his chest. With a little more confidence, Jungkook looked with his mouth for the hardened bud of your breast and pulled it softly between his teeth. He was rewarded with a moan, only slightly louder than the one before and he realized, he wanted you screaming. He wanted you to moan his name. Hear your voice penetrate through the walls of his apartment and disturb the neighbors. This was his new goal.

“Y/N,” he said softly trying to get your attention. Instantly, you looked down from your position, your pupils were blown wide. A beautiful sight.

“Is it okay if I-” and then his confidence waned and so he gestured to your shirt with his eyes a couple of times. You smiled at him.

“Mhm, go for it Kookie.”

Was this what it felt like to be called a good boy? Because Jungkook loved it. He needed more. More. More.

Eagerly, Jungkook untucked your shirt from your pants and bunched  it up right under your boobs. The expanse of skin that he had exposed seemed like an oasis in a desert. He couldn’t help the pull of gravity that connected his lips to your stomach. They were not soft, nor gentle. They were fast and more pecks than anything. They tickled your skin as he tried to cover every single open spot with his love.

He worked his way up and nudged your shirt higher with his nose.

“Y/N?”

“Yes, Jungkook?” You asked exasperated.

“Can I take this off?”

You groaned, “Yes. Take it off. All of it, my shirt, my pants, my underwear. Whatever you want. You have my permission.”

Sheepishly, Jungkook obeyed. You raised your arms over your head and arched your back to make it easier for him to undress you.

He pulled it off swiftly, ruffling your hair in the process. He tossed the shirt aside, excited to see what he was unwrapping. He wasn’t disappointed. Had you known you would be undressing for someone today? Or did your undergarments always consist of lavish fabrics and sexy shapes?

Jungkook didn’t care. He just felt honored to be able to see it. The see through fabric held together by underwire did little to hide the prize behind the clothing. Your nipples stood pert and puckered under it all. Begging to be released. He wondered if your underwear matched.

It was weird. The things one noticed when something monumental was happening. Like the golden stiching that held the bra together, or the way that the underwire dug into your skin to hold your perfect breasts in place.

Then in a second, he was moving again, frantically unbuttoning your pants and ripping them off your body without hesitation. He must know. It was life or death for him   to know if your underwear matched.

He tossed the pants in the opposite direction of the discarded shirt. He watched it fly over a lamp and land on a box that he thought had his art supplies. With bated breath, he turned to look at you. It felt as if his whole life had been leading to this moment.

And yes. The answer was that you were wearing a set. His mouth salivated as the scent of your arousal hit his nose. He wanted nothing more than to bury his face in your folds and die.

But he slowed down and took in every inch of your body. He wanted to remember it. Every freckle, every curve. He wanted a picture to hang in his bathroom or to draw you on his ipad so he could use it to jerk off when you weren’t around because after this, he knew that no other image would do it for him. Not anymore

He watched your chest heave. He looked up at your face again, asking for permission even though you had already given it to him.

“Jungkook, if you don’t touch me in the next five seconds I’m gonna bite your dick off,” you growled.

Oof… that was not one of his kinks, thank you very much, but it was the last push he needed, because he slithered down your body and pulled your legs around his shoulders staring at the promise land between your legs.

He could already see a bit of your natural lubricant running down your lightly covered slits.

You watched him, entranced by how hypnotized he seemed by your entrance. A laugh gurgled at your throat.

“Wow, if I knew that all it would take to shut you up was for me to wrap my legs around your head, I would have done it sooner,” you teased.

But the laughter died on your lips as jungkook opened his mouth wide and licked a thick stripe from your entrance to your clit. Even with the fabric in between his tongue and your skin, it felt like heaven.

“Fuck, Jungkook…” your hand flew to his hair, tangling in the locks of deep noir that you loved to braid when you two sat together watching a movie.

He kissed up and down your lower lips lovingly, lickig his lips as if it was the most delicious thing he had ever tasted in his life.

He hummed, sending a long vibration to your core which clamped around thin air as if trying to stop it from leaving.

“I can’t wait to really taste you, Bunny… fuck you’re delicious…” Every word was like a strike to your center. Arousal gushed from your entrance that made jungkook’s eyes sparkle in earnest enthusiasm.

Without asking, he pulled your underwear to the side, and buried his face in your juices. A bit of self consciousness wormed its way into your brain. He could be lying about how it tastes. Did it smell okay?

But the devilish sounds of him slurping and sucking at your folds pushed the thoughts away. He held your ass up, pulling you closer and closer to his face. He never felt like he was quite close enough. His nose brushed continuously against your clit and when he noticed the way you screamed under your breath every time it happened, he made it his mission to continue to do just that as he laved at your pulsing hole.

You had been hiding all of this from him. The paradise between your legs. The treat at your center. He wouldn’t let you hide from him any longer. He’d rather perish than to go one more day without your center at his lips.

Short, consecutive moans fell from the petals of your lips. Your orgasm built slowly at first, not coming to a head- both literally and figuratively and he could tell. He pushed his tongue into your entrance. Your walls closed on it, trying to keep it inside. His name came from your lips like a prayer. But it wasn’t enough. He wanted you to scream his name. To never be able to think of another doing what he was doing to you in that moment, so when your eventual crash came, he was less than satisfied.

You were breathing heavily. Your legs twitched. Jungkook ripped his face from your core only because you pulled harshly at his hair. From his nose to his chin, he shone with your cum. If there was anything hotter than that you couldn't picture it.

But then he was standing, and he ripped his belt from the loops and began to undress.

Looking over his shoulder as he pulled his pants down he said, “Take off your bra and underwear. Are you on the pill?”

Shocked, you followed his demands, though they were given loosely. You shook your head no and he gave you one nod of confirmation.

“I have condoms. You’re not allergic or anything right?”

Again you negated his question with a shake of your head and he half smiled.

“We could stop if you want-”

“Don’t be a fucking tease, JK,” you rolled your eyes and spead your legs, hooking one on the head rest of the couch so he could see your abused lips which were dripping for him.

His eyes widened only for a second, but then he tore his shirt off and scrounged for his wallet where he kept a condom. He ripped it open with his bunny teeth and pulled his underwear off unceremoniously.

You watched in fixed fascination as his cock sprang free of its confines, so hard that it looked painful. It was bound to feel good.

He rolled the condom on carefully before he situated himself between your legs and wiped your juices from his face. He was partially on his knees and partially standing. It was easy to find your entrance with your legs spread so wide.

When his head pushed in, you let your head fall back. Maybe it was because you already had one orgasm under your belt or maybe Jungkook’s dick was just a good fit but pure pleasure filled your body. He watched your reaction, gritting his teeth as your walls clamped down  around him, resisting his entrance.

“Does it hurt?”

You gurgled something that you couldn’t make out but Jungkook seemed to understand because he nodded and pushed in farther, slowly. He bottomed out, his balls gently hit your ass and your vagina clenched, feeling every ridge of his member within you.

“Fuck… Y/N… I… I don’t know how long I can last…”

It was so sensitive. Every little twitch of his dick felt monumental. In all honesty, you weren’t sure if you could last either.

“Move,” you managed.

You didn’t have to tell him twice. He pulled out slowly then slammed back into you. Your skin clapped loudly in the mostly empty apartment. You whimpered. Your back arched. He pulled out again, then slammed back in. His pace was marked. Timed. It made your boobs jiggle as he grabbed your hips to help you meet his movements.

Cute little ‘ah’s filled his ears. They got higher pitched as you neared your end. Jungkook couldn’t believe his luck. You were so tight. So wet and the way your walls closed around him made him grow close to his end much quicker than he ever had by hand.

“Y/N… I’m gonna… I’mma…”

But you beat him to it. Your pussy clamped down and fluttered around him as your second orgasm crashed upon you.

You moaned his name as he continued to pound into you. Whines and pleas went unheard as he sped up. He needed you to know who you belonged to… in like a totally consensual way.

You were so sensitive, but the pain of over stimulation gave way to pleasure far too soon and a third orgasm consumed you.

In pure shock, Jungkook grunted and moaned, your vagina got even tighter around him. And he came violently, with his dick mid thrust and his name bouncing off the walls in the tone of your exhausted voice.

Spurt after spurt of white, hot cum spilled from his member and into the condom. He was so caught up in his pleasure that he didn’t notice nor hear the front door open.

Both of you heard a gasp and footsteps. Jungkook, mid orgasm, snapped his heavy head to the sound. To his complete surprise and embarrassment, there stood the aloof neighbor that was always walking into the wrong apartment.

At first, you were embarrassed, being naked was not something you did frequently in the presence of others, but then you were upset. Angry. How stupid could one girl be? Shouldn’t she learn that this was not her place after a billion and one mistakes?

For a second, all three of you were frozen. Jungkook’s orgasm finished and his cock quickly deflated. He jumped to action quickly, throwing his body over yours to cover you before he looked back at the neighbor and said, “this isn’t your apartment!”

Over Jungkook’s toned shoulder, you watched her eyes dart to his exposed ass before they filled with tears.

“Oppa…” she said under her breath, before the tears streamed and she turned on her heels and hurried out.

Your blood boiled. It seemed you were right. She wasn’t stupid at all. She had a crush on your… person? Whatever he was. He was yours- in a ‘I want to be yours and like it’s totally okay for you to say that’ kind of way, and you were not going to put up with some random girl who clearly didn’t have boundaries.

Jungkook looked down at you, his cheeks were red and you could tell he was extremely uncomfortable.

Carefully, he pulled his softened member from your core and made a show of removing the condom then disposing of it. You began to put your underwear and bra back on, watching him walk around his apartment butt naked. Would he say something? Or would you have to bring it up?

After minutes of silence, you decided you would have to be the one to break the awkwardness.

“So uh… do you know what her actual apartment is? Maybe we can put a note on your front door for her to remind her,” you half joked, standing to find your shirt and pants, but settling instead for the button up he was wearing before.

Jungkook pulled his shorts on, his back was to you. There was a tenseness in his muscles that wasn’t going away and something in the air struck fear in the pit of your stomach.

“She lives next door.”

Something about the way he said it made you feel like it was a confession of sorts. It made you want to run.  But instead, you sat in his shirt as he rifled in his boxes for a pair of more comfortable pants before you decided to drop it for now, knowing that whatever it was that was hanging in the air around you wasn’t something you were ready for.

“Jungkook, where's your broom?”

“Uh…,” there was a hint of a laugh in his voice and some of the pressure lifted from the atmosphere, “was I supposed to buy one?”

You rolled your eyes for the millionth time that day and berated him for not having bought the basic necessities for his home. Everything felt lighter, but still like you were trending on eggshells. It felt like instead of taking a step forward, you had taken six steps back. You were no more clear on what you were or what to do than you had been the last couple of weeks.

You helped him unpack that day, because you knew he wouldn’t do it on his own. He joked with you as if nothing had happened, and you sassed him all the same but something was off… and you didn’t know if it could be fixed without it first breaking you both.

[imnotwolverine]

The marriage pact - A Bird’s Life

Henry Cavill x OC Alice - multi-chapter

< Part 18 | Part 19 A Bird’s Life | Part 20 >

Disclaimer: Some strong language

Author’s note: I hope you can survive my attempt at writing poetry.🤓

Word count: 1.475

(Link to my Masterlist)

Dear readers,

When I was young my school reports always had one and the same comment; “Alice should try to get a bit more out of her shell”. I was simply said the shy kid, the nerdy girl, the one who always got the good grades and didn’t want to upset anyone. For the longest time I always put everyone before me. I was the giver, not the receiver, of attention and whenever someone wished to give me that attention, be it as a friend or lover, I pushed them away. I just didn’t know how to cope.

And even now after all these years it still, at times, makes me feel a little weirded out. I do not like to be the centre of attention. Not even when it’s the attention of just one person. Why I exactly feel like that, I don’t know. Is it a form of self protection? Building up walls? Perhaps. In any way, I will have to deal with it. Because me and chocolate cake are getting pretty serious about a lot of things. Adult things.

It happens to just be so that part of these adult things is caring for each other in equal measure. Being there for one another. Letting lust and demand grow into love and care. Or, as U.A. Fanthorpe lovingly described it in her poem Atlas; “There is a kind of love, called maintenance.”

And I, dear readers, want that maintenance kind of love, I do.

Ali

‘I didn’t know you read poetry.’ Henry said, your bodies huddled close together in the mid December wind. It was a small but unfortunate side effect of living near the sea; it seemed to always be windy. And in winter, that gave you a whole new sense of “fuck it’s cold”. I shivered into his chest, watching Kal zoom through the bushes like it was just another fine summers day.

‘Every now and then. It’s a bit of a left over habit from college.’

’Twas a nice poem. The whole collection of poems on that website actually.’ He smiled. ‘You read them all?’ I raised an eyebrow and looked up at his now outgrowing beard. Henry was growing a beard and I did not mind it one bit - it made me feel all kinds of literal and figurative tingles. He snickered. ‘Perhaps.’

‘Henry the poetry man! Makes me wonder actually. You are good with words, but do you ever write yourself?’ I looked back at the stone cobbled path ahead of us, our booted feet tapping in joined rhythm on the cold rock. I really, really enjoyed our walks together and from the fact Henry always near forced me to join him for his walks no matter how bad the weather, I derived he did so too.

‘Perhaps.’ He finally said, earning a inquisitive eyebrow raise from me. ‘Perhaps? Mr. Cavill, please do not dare and keep secrets from me!’ I prodded him in his side and he chuckled, shaking his head. ‘I wouldn’t dare. I just hadn’t ..come around to sharing it with you yet.’

‘Sounds like a secret to me.’ I laughed, seeing Kal had found himself a nice stick. ‘Oh Kal bear! At least you keep no secrets huh?’ I ruffled my fingers through his fur when he came to present his new found treasure to us, Henry’s hand near automatically taking it from the friendly Akita to throw it a bit further down the road, for the dog to fetch.

‘Okay. Something I wrote a while ago..don’t judge me though. It’s..-‘ ‘A secret.’ I squeezed my lips tight as if promising to keep my lips shut from here on. He sniffled. ‘Something like that.’

Clearing his throat and gazing out over the wintery landscape, he started:

‘A bird’s life

Before their singing rings I wake, an early riser Come morning do I take On the day, again a little whiter

Striding feet I follow Black and white, his beard too grey I hear my mothers voice speak again Do your duty come what may

But as I follow my winged friends Around the world I sink Dragging feet that stall and linger Not always can this be so, I think

My nests though many Are fewer my home My coffins are filled With gold silver and woe

As days then end I reach Yet another homeless nest Its branches prickle and when I look Hours more not to rest

Sun rises burning and Sore feet hit cold levels Long distances I go more Until sweet dreams too unravel

This journey’s not mine Too lonesome to stay I flicker my wings And yet again for love, do I pray.’

Silence fell as the last of his words filtered through the morning air, my ears still peeked as I now listened to his slow, calm breath, my hand wrapped around his arm. He had spoken as if his poem was directed at the birds in the trees themselves, his eyes reaching up to the empty branches in the near distance, no birds to be seen. It was just us two. Or three actually, as Kal, though blissfully aware of this magical moment, was there too, roaming around freely in the thicket.

‘When did you write that?’ I finally asked, looking up at him, his face calm. ‘The day after you left London. I actually hadn’t slept a wink that night before you had to fly back. I…gosh I’m such a foo-‘ - ‘Stop that.’ I halted my feet and gave him a fiery gaze. ‘Don’t apologise for your feelings.’ I admonished, then gently rubbed his arm. ‘And that was a terribly beautiful poem Hen.’

‘Hmm.’ He smiled, slightly unsure. ‘Thank you Ali.’

‘No thank you. And to answer your bird’s heart.’ I cupped his cheek in both hands. ‘I love you and I want to make that journey with you, I do.’

‘Even after all the surrogate mother shit and..’ - ‘Henry William Dalgliesh Cavill. Did you just haphazardly skip the first half of my blog this morning?’ I raised a teasing, yet authoritative eyebrow at him. He bit his lip to hide a chuckle. ‘I’m doing it too, huh?’

‘Yep. Take my love you fool! Take it! TAKE IT!’ I used both my hands to shake him like a salt shaker - though little did I actually get him to move as this man was about as built as the empire state building. His smile grew and grew and before long he was laughing aloud, his head nodding in amusement. ‘Okay Ali. Ali. You can stop now. I surrender.’

‘Then kiss me like you mea-‘ I wasn’t even allowed to finish that sentence, his lips crashing down onto mine. Soft and plushy, the after taste of his morning coffee still lingering, he was not going to let the moment go to waste.

We probably stood there for a few minutes. Just kissing, our cheeks burning like hot coals despite the icy wind around us, his hands carefully wrapped around my head, keeping me where he wanted me to be. His fellow bird, ready to fly out together.

Or well, almost; first I had to take my employer up on that hiatus proposal.  

—

‘I got the okay! She’s going to check for a temp writer and once that person’s all settled in, I could..go with you.’ I cheered, flying around Henry’s neck, not minding the fact that his parents were also near - his mom just peeking her head around the corner of the kitchen and his dad probably reading his newspaper in the living room.

‘What?! Really?!’ Henry’s smile grew from ear to ear as he wrapped me, winter coat and all, in his arms. ‘Baby that’s..’ He leaned back again. ‘Wow.’ He near giggled.

‘Are you staying for dinner, Ali?’ His mom inquired, infiltrating on our little moment. We quickly awoke from our little bubble and Henry muttered some quiet apology, pushing the still opened front door closed behind us.

‘Eh…’ I blinked at Henry. He smiled and nodded, bidding me to accept her offer. ‘Yes please. Thank you Marianne.’ I looked over at her and she gave me a most adoring wink. ‘You are practically family Ali.’ She mused, disappearing back into the kitchen where dinner was already well on the way.

I watched her waddle off, feeling Henry’s strong arms pull me in for a full-circled swoop through the air, making me fly like the birds in his poem. ‘I love you so much!’ He exclaimed, making me laugh with pure giddiness. ‘Hen! Carefu— OHH — HEN- put me down, put me down hahahah. Oh gosh.’ I squirmed until finally he put me back on my feet, his wide teethed grin causing sweet dimples to crease his cheeks.

‘I love you too, silly.’

‘Then I better start calling my agent, hmm?’

‘Mhm. You better.’

--

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[gra-sonas]

Hi! Can I just say that the thing I'm most thankful for today is you and your blog. It's literally the onlu tumblr I check every single day without fail & especially in times of turmoil your positivity just brings this peace. I'll be the 1st to admit that I'm not a fan of CAM, to say that I've disliked her since TVD is putting it mildly, but I just came from another blog and saw all these posts listing her faults. I know she's not perfect and I don't even like her but those posts weighed me down

2 so I just went back to your blog to reread all your positive response and I just wanted to say thank you. I didn't even expect to feel bad bec of criticism of CAM bec they were very valid points. But hammering it out after all these time is just heavy om the heart. I feel like what we need to do now is to move forward and heal and put her behind us. So I'm looking forward to any positive feeling or thoughts you'll be willing to share with us. You are a force of good and I'm sending you love

Goodness, I’ve received so much love yesterday, I’m feeling a bit overwhelmed that this continues. 😳Your message made me smile tho, and I thank you for your kind words, nonnie! It makes me happy to know that my blog brings you some comfort. ❤️❤️❤️

Ngl, we’ve had a bit of a rough year. First the S1 finale debacle, then a very long hiatus that left the fandom fractured, followed by a rather underwhelming season 2 - it’s no surprise that there’s currently a lot of bitterness being voiced, especially since CAM contributed in different, and sometimes quite significant ways to what’s upset people. Believe me, I too am still bitter about quite a few things.

But I don’t want to let that bitterness consume me, I don’t want to dwell on it, especially now, when there’s a clean cut and a somewhat promising future on the horizon. 

For my own peace of mind, I want to focus on positivity, the possibilities, and all the things I LOVE about the show and its characters. Because there’s still so much I love about RNM (the reason why I’m still here, even tho I didn’t watch S2). S3 won’t be on our screens for another year, and I’d rather try and enjoy the time as much as I can (I don’t want another hellatus...).

I got a lot of asks the night when news broke that she’d leave the show (more than 50 👀), and quite a few of them pointed out negative things about her, listed rumors about her behavior (some dating back to times prior to RNM), mentioned rude comments she’s made, stuff like that. And I’m okay with people sending me these kinds of asks (I get it, sometimes it just feels good to blow off steam). 

I didn’t publish them tho, bc like you, the negativity tends to weigh me down, and I don’t want to amplify it.

Tbh, I’m just really tired of being weighed down by negativity. The show did that to me for the longest time (especially the last couple of months), and CAM definitely did play her part in that. But she’s gone now, and I’m more than ready to move on. 

There’s nothing we can change about the past 2 seasons, none of the mistakes or writing choices that were made can be undone. Canon is what it is (minus that scene, I refuse to acknowledge its existence), and I more than understand that not everyone’s ready to move on yet, that some of that bitterness has to get out first, be discussed and maybe rehashed a couple more times - all in order to eventually let it go. 

I want to focus on the good things from now on tho. I want to fangirl, read fic,  write fic (haha, as if my muse would let me 😒DEAR MUSE, I HAVE A BIG BANG TO WRITE, PLS DON’T MAKE IT SO HARD FOR ME), make gifs, perhaps rewatch some S1 scenes. I want to swoon over Tyler, laugh at Vlamis, slowly get excited about S3 around the time they return to Santa Fe - just nurture the little seed of hope that things will be better next season.

I really do feel a lot more hopeful now. I’m not as anxious anymore, I don’t dread thinking about the future of the show like I used to. I’m well aware that even with a new show runner things can go sideways. Chris Hollier isn’t some savior who’s gonna magically fix all past mistakes and will never make any of his own.

He just seems a little less unpredictable, a little less “vindictive”, and a lot less thriving on misery, all things I appreciate. He’s also not constantly on social media to either “spy” on what fans are talking about, or barging in to “correct” us when we supposedly focus on the “wrong” things.

We may have lost the hot wire connection to the show runner, but imo that can be an advantage. I’m sure regardless of him not monitoring fan activity on Twitter and Tumblr 24/7, Chris is well aware of how important Malex are to fans, and he knows how important they are to Tyler and Vlamis. I believe he also knows about all the grievances fans have regarding making PoC the villains, mistreating Maria, sidelining characters, and so on.

He doesn’t have to be on social media to be aware of these things (many of the RNM writers are on social media, it would be a miracle if they didn’t talk about stuff like that in the writers room), and I hope he’s gonna fix some of the more glaring issues, and hopefully he’ll refrain from fucking up Malex (I believe they are in good hands with him tho).

Anyway, this got long and super rambly. Sorry, must’ve been something in the water this morning xD 

Here’s to a mostly enjoyable hiatus, what I can do to make it a little more silly and fun, I’ll do. ✨💚👽

[forehead-enthusiast]

A Buncha Tag Games (and yet not all of them)

tagged by: @eggyukhei mwah

tagging: this is a LOT of games so i’ll only tag @atinyphobe @nsheetee and @veonjun for the SECOND (2nd) game. if they or anybody wants to do any of the other games, absolutely go for it and say i tagged you <3 i’d love to see what you guys say!! (also, tk if you felt like you wanted to answer my questions from the second game i’d be interested to see!)

One:

tell me the first song that made you stan your current fave group and why did your faves attract you so much?

ok SO the song that probably got me into rv 100% (also yes ik this blog is 99% nct but rv is my forever fave no question) was probably ice cream cake!! i had been a casual listener of many groups up until that point and had never really stanned anyone, but icc was so infectious i found myself watching it over and over. i had heard happiness and be natural before but hadn’t really listened too closely, so icc was the song that captured me. after that, dumb dumb only cemented my love for them more, and the red is still one of my favorite kpop albums to date. rv attracted me primarily because of their incredible vocals and their versatility in genres and concepts. i still get so excited wondering what they’ll tackle next!! they’re just soooo unique and have one of, if not the best discographies of any group. i cannot stress enough, I. Love. RV!! also they’re funny and gay so. anyway stream monster once it drops uwu

Two:

rule: answer the ten questions and write your own!

1. what is your favorite song that’s been released during quarantine? ooooo honestly??? probably something off of Sawayama. literally every song bangs so hard i highly recommend that album to anyone!! i can’t pick a favorite off it but who’s gonna save you now is awesome and xs is just,,, chef’s kiss

2. what is your greatest mishap when you tried cooking? (or something you’ve witnessed) one time, while making soup at my late grandmother’s house on her like gas stove, i put a lid on a pot and somehow that led the pot to be engulfed in flames. IN MY DEFENSE i was like 7, and i’m great at cooking/baking now

3. what’s your go-to outfit or article of clothing? oh i love a nice dress. they can be casual or formal, and you look like you put effort into your outfit except i didn’t because i didn’t have to match anything yo!!!! also shorts have trouble fitting me cause i’m a weird body type so dresses tend to be very comfy for me

4. what is your comfort food? am i allowed to say like all food??? eating in itself is comforting,,, that sounds depressing but also i just like eating yummy food. i guess i’d say like my dad’s fried rice?? its my fave and no one makes it like him soooo

5. what singular moment in your life would you like to relive? i couldn’t tell if this meant like, a good moment you want to re-experience or go back in time and redo a moment and fix it. it’s kind of a hard question so i might cop out and go with a bit of a silly answer: i want to relive the hi touch with astro...... i wanna look at rocky’s beautiful eyes and touch moonbin’s hand ok,,,,

6. what is your favorite line and/or character from a movie, show, or book? i got a bunch but a few off the top of my head are genie lo (the epic crush of genie lo), ty lee, suki (atla), klaus, and ben (umbrella academy) 

7. if you could only choose one ice cream flavor and pizza topping/style for the rest of your life, what would it be? ice cream flavor: this very specific one from a local store that is banana ice cream with strawberries and oreo mixed in. it is heaaaavenly. as for pizza topping, i love a breakfast type pizza with an egg on top and like sausage and stuff!!!

8. what is the worst injury you’ve ever had or witnessed? funny enough, i’ve actually gotten badly injured quite a few times, and always on the face!! god hates me. the worst was probably when i hit a metal bench with my face and it took a chunk out of my cheek. i still have the scar! as for “witnessed” i accidentally broke a grown man’s rib once as a child, so i guess that would count.

9. would you rather explore the unknown of space or the bottom of the ocean? oceaaaan!! i answered this in some other game, but i like how mysterious and yet close the ocean is. like proximity wise it’s so near, yet there’s an insane amount we know nothing about. that’s so frightening but so intriguing

10. if you could be any cartoon character, who would you be? my first thought was literally “kirby. eat fast” GOD my followers are gonna think i’m just a glutton and they’re not even gonna be wrong im dying. but uhh idk mulan or smth?

my questions:

what is your go-to feel good movie?

are you the type of person who’s indecisive about buying, or the type to impulse buy once you see something you like?

do you prefer chocolate-y or fruity candy?

what idol do you think is most similar to you? (not your bias necessarily)

do you have any silly dealbreakers? if so, what are they?

what do you do to unwind?

what is a small thing you like to do for people you love? (be it sending memes, remembering their favorite shows, etc)

what’s/who’s your favorite myth/mythological being?

what is a non-typical pet you would want to have?

do you say pronounce data as day-ta or dah-ta?

THREE

rule: bold the statements that apply to you, italicize your aspirations, then tag nine people. 

AIR ༉⋆͙̈

i have small hands / i love the night sky / i watch animals and birds when i pass them by / i drink herbal tea / i wake to see the dawn / the smell of dust is comforting / i’m valued for being wise / i prefer books to music / i meditate / i find joy in learning new truths from the world around me

FIRE ༉⋆͙̈

i don’t have straight hair / i like to wear ripped jeans and overalls / i play an organized sport / i love dogs / i am not afraid of adventure / i love to talk to strangers / i always try new foods / i enjoy road trips / summer is my favorite season / my radio is always playing

WATER ༉⋆͙̈

i wear bracelets on my wrists / i love the bustle of the city / i have more than one set of piercings / i read poetry / i love the sound of a thunderstorm / i want to travel the world / i sleep past midday most days / i love simply lit dinners and fluorescent signs / i rewatch kids shows out of nostalgia / i see emotions in colors not words

EARTH ༉⋆͙̈

i wear glasses or contacts / i enjoy doing the laundry / i am a vegetarian or vegan / i have an excellent sense of time / my humor is very cheerful / i am a valued advisor to my friends / i believe in true love / i love this chill of mountain air / i’m always listening to music / i am highly trusted by the people in my life

AETHER ༉⋆͙̈

i go without makeup in my daily life / i make my own artwork / i keep on track of my tasks and time / i always know true north / i see beauty in everything / i can always smell flowers / i smile at everyone i pass by / i always fear history repeating itself / i have recovered from a mental disorder / i can love unconditionally

FOUR

the ultimate tag: answer whichever ones you want to because there are a lot and then tag a few blogs you’d like to get to know better! 

PERSONAL

name: sarah

nickname: bells

birthday: april 17th

zodiac: aries

nationality: chinese american

languages: english, some spanish, some korean

gender: female

sexuality: baby bi bi bi~

height: 5′10

BLOG STUFF

inspiration for muse: i suppose nct since i write for them the most?? but i feel like sometimes i come up with the idea before i think of a member so sometimes the muse is just my own fantasies oops

meaning behind my url: i made it at a time where loads of idols were getting bangs and honestly i believe most of them look infinitely better without them, thus i was and still am enthusiastic about foreheads.

blog established: like winter of 2018...?? i think

followers: over 2.5k but most deactivated/left during my hiatus lol

FAVORITES

favourite animals: sharks, chickens, snakes, cats, penguins

favourite books: the epic crush of genie lo and then iron will of genie lo, PERIOD

favourite colour: pink and purple!!

favourite fictional characters: lol, again, genie lo, ty lee, suki, klaus, ben, and just a few more: richard and evelyn o’connell (the mummy), dave (dave), michael (the good place)

favourite flower: sunflower

favourite scent: baking chocolate, heating butter, blackberry, wisteria

favourite season: probably spring! i like warmth but not HEAT

RANDOM

average hours of sleep: ugh idek i sleep horribly

cats or dogs: both, but unfortunately i’ve never had either

coffee, tea or hot chocolate: tea but then hot chocolate

current time: 5:29pm

dream trip: go to paris and eat loads of pastries and enjoy the fashions and beauty of the city, and also learn to bake better maybe?

dream job: actress

hobbies: making jewelry, drawing, singing, reading comics

hogwarts house: according to the quizzes, all of them. people who have just met me think slytherin or gryffindor, people who i’m friends with think ravenclaw or hufflepuff, people who know me really well know you can’t box a person into oversimplified archetypes :’) in my assessment of myself, it varies by the day, but i think perhaps gryffindor today?

last movie watched: hot fuzz (a classic)

last song listened to: summer breeze by sf9

no. of blankets you sleep with: like 2

random fact(s): i won lego building competitions as a child, one of my dream roles is anastasia from the musical named after her, i played violin for a very short time, i bake the cakes for all my family and friends’ birthdays, i have strangely strong grip strength

SIX

10 songs i can’t stop listening to:

love me 4 me- rina sawayama

cherry- rina sawayama

in & out- red velvet

crush culture- conan gray

manic- conan gray

the king- conan gray

summer- pentagon

told you now- jeremy jordan (originally sung by sam smith)

fuck this world (interlude)- rina sawayama

someone who loves me- sara bareilles

[mxndwitch]

Dear Tumblr fam,

I have something to say, that has been weighing on my heart for a while now and it needs to be put out there, so I can get it off my chest. First of all, this is not a call out post in any way, it’s not aimed at anyone in particular, but merely an observation I have made over my many years of Tumblr roleplay.

As writers and human beings, we all go through phases. One day we love our writing, the next we hate it. Sometimes we’re so motivated that we could reply to a certain thread ten times a day, sometimes we just hop on the dash to write ooc and connect with the people we like on here. One sentiment we ALL share at some point in one way or another, is feeling abandoned and unimportant. There is hardly anything sadder in the rp world, than loving to write a character, but feeling insignificant and unwanted on the dash. I dare say that many of us would agree, that it’s often our rp friends who give us the feeling that we’re no longer valuable to them, that they have moved on to more interesting rp partners than us and that we lost a friend along with a writing partner. As wonderful as it is to have duplicates of every character and the opportunity to just write with whoever you want at all times, it can also be the source of sadness for someone else.

It is natural that people’s interests shift sometimes, that one verse suddenly feels more appealing than another, or a certain muse because very important to their character, so writing something new and thrilling is more interesting than interacting with the same squad all the time, which is OKAY. Everyone is allowed to interact with more muns than just their close friends, but I think in this fast paced and slightly anonymous world of internet interactions, it is sometimes easy to forget that there are people behind the screens that notice when you ignore their messages, don’t answer their asks suddenly and neglect their threads in favor of others. And although that can happen by accident in the spur of the moment, or just because of a busy schedule, I think it’s important to sometimes remember where you came from. Who your die hard friends were, when you started out, who has stuck with you through time.

Remember that the people that consider you a friend on here, will get sad when you just ignore and abandon them, because they are actual people with real emotions behind the characters. Don’t use welcoming and friendly people as stepping stones to get into a fandom, just to drop them once the cool kids start latching onto you. DON’T TAKE YOUR FRIENDS FOR GRANTED! Send them memes, shoot them a quick message here and there to see how they’re doing, like their ooc posts so they see that you’re still interested in them. Takes a second, but means a whole lot. No one should feel forced to delete their blog, or go on a long hiatus, just because they feel like their friends moved on and they have no one left in the fandom & lost all the relationships they held dear. It might be silly, but let’s be real: we get attached to ships and characters, almost as much as we get attached to people and it hurts to see it all go to waste, or suddenly to someone else.

Be kind, be thoughtful, be humble. Honor your friends & try to help people out who are struggling. Most of us come here to escape our lives for a little while and there is nothing worse than feeling unloved & unappreciated in real life and watching the same happen in your safe place as well. Always remember that a small act of kindness & appreciation go a long way. It often just takes an ask meme, or a quick ‘hi, hope your day is good’ to make someone very happy. Be the person you want to have in this rp world.

Peace out, Katie

[pcsitivibee]

do you guys give advice to help a once active tumblr get noticed again after a two week hiatus . i just got back from a two week hiatus and i feel like no one wants to rp with my muse anymore. i've even thought of deleting my blog and taking a break from tumblr.

hi there honey bee     !     there’s only one person behind this blog and that’s why i couldn’t get to this right away but here i am now    !     since it’s just me,     i can only share my point of view from my experiences rping and let me start off by saying that at least from my end,     the community i’m in (including this blog) has been sort of dying off.    people are less active,     i have so many old people i adore that left and on top of that it’s the holiday season so the volume here is probably the lowest i’ve seen in my     4 years     that i’ve been on here.     so one of the reasons why you might feel like there’s a lack of interest     IN YOU     just might be because people are busier than usual and they aren’t here and it isn’t about you     !     i feel discouragement a lot more lately,     so i want you to know that although it’s not the same thing,    you are not alone     !     what you are feeling is valid     and you don’t deserve to feel like this     !    but i hope what i said about the general traffic helped in some way.

second,     let’s put this in perspective.     if you leave for two weeks for any reason,    any reason at all,     people who are your true friends should embrace you when you return.    if people show the tendency to replace you just because you have a life to attend to outside of your blog,    then are they really your friends     ?     i don’t think they are.     you shouldn’t feel any obligation to be online.    writing should be a hobby,     but i understand your frustration because i too worry about hiatuses and what not.     my suggestion for you would be to communicate with your close partners and maybe be direct about the situation.     let them know you’re back and if they’re still giving you the cold shoulder,    they sadly aren’t worth your time.     i am a firm believer that there are writers out there who will truly value you as a person behind a blog     first     and also value your character regardless of who that is.    they can be hard to find sometimes but     if there’s the tiniest piece of want and passion in your heart about your muse,     i don’t think you should be deleting your blog.     think about the very first day you created your blog and try to recall the excitement and all the things that you were thinking about back then when you first started     !      

in dire times that’s what i always go back to and i ask myself   :     why did i make this blog to begin with     ?     because let’s be real.     no one writes   “for other people’s entertainment”   first.    first,    it’s for you.     again,     if you are passionate about your muse and you have the want,    i’d say be direct with those who are close to you and maybe reach out a little more towards different fandoms and people and see if you can establish new friendships.     at the end of day,     please remember that you come first.    and if writing here is giving you more stress and grief than happiness and an outlet,     then there’s nothing wrong with taking a break.     breaks can be healthy    !    i’m laying out a bunch of things here because i don’t know what the exact situation is for you.    i hope this sort of helps    ?     also,    you are welcome to send me an ask or im off anon,    i promise not to disclose your name to anyone if you want to discuss your specific situation.   i truly hope you feel better and don’t forget that     YOU MATTER AND YOU ARE WORTH ALL THE ATTENTION AND THE LOVE.    people don’t set those values,   you do.    i’m sending you all the good vibes friend. 

[fallxnprxnce]

Update: Hiatus ending soon...

{out of exile} Hey, everyone! I wanted to give you all a little update on what’s been going on behind the scenes with this blog. Nuada’s been quiet for a while now... almost 6 months... and for that I apologize. Real life has been rough on and off, and many of you know that Nuada is a difficult muse for me to write when my head is all screwy about real life problems, heh. Things are okay right now, summer classes start June 25th but I only have 35 students, so even though it’s an accelerated summer course, it shouldn’t be too much more of a drain on my free time. In theory. ;) Nuada has been slowly coming back to me over the past month or so, and I have worked on a few drafts. I haven’t made as much progress on drafts as I would like, but I do have an excuse for that which I think most of you would be happy about and deem acceptable. XD

For those who remember, about a year ago, I started working on a crossover fan fiction story, bringing together the worlds of Hellboy and Silent Hill. Basically, Nuada will enter Silent Hill, and the supernatural moral judgement that such a visit entails will test his convictions regarding his plan to eradicate humans. I couldn’t get the story to work, though, and after much deliberation, I shelved it for a while. Well, I’m writing it again, and it’s going very well! =D

My plan is to slowly get activity back on this blog by the end of this week, posting replies and memes again and getting to some of the starters and asks many of you have left for me in my ask box. When I finish the fanfic, I’ll be posting it here in chapters, and I’ll have a master post that will link to all the chapter posts for convenience. I’ll make a post after this one about the fanfic, asking you to like it if you want to be tagged in that master post once everything is finished and ready for you guys to read. It’ll be a little while yet, I’m about a third of the way through writing it just going by what I’ve mapped out, but it’s going well and fast, so it won’t be years or even many months, it’ll be in the near future. =)

I’m going to try to not put Nuada on a long hiatus again like I just did, which means I’ll keep him active along with my other muses from now. What that ultimately means is that activity may be slow at times, replies may take longer, memes/asks might get answered after a few days, and there may be lulls if I lose muse, depending on how busy my job and real life are. I think lower or sporadic activity all the time is better, though, than an extended hiatus to wait for the perfect time to bring him back. I’ve come to realize that there is no perfect time, haha, so I just need to keep him active along with my other muses and juggle him in with the mix. XD

[noxperditus]

So, a little while ago Zarkon’s blog hit 200 followers...unfortunately I was sick as all hell and I couldn’t do much besides sleep and be miserable. So we’re a little late on the milestone, but hey! Any excuse to share some love.

LOYALISTS -

-Those who have proven their allegiance//Friends & fun people, in no particular order

@paterfamileo - Tali, holy crap. You are one of the people who has most affected my portrayal of Zarkon. From silly things like his (anti-)social drinking problem to the true depths of his possessive type of affection, your input has really helped me shape the muse. And your Alfor? He is perfection, I love him so much. Beyond Voltron, we’re into so many of the same things - from HZD to LoZ, I have so much fun talking to you about every little thing. I feel lucky that I can call you a friend.

@ograndsovereign - Devil, I’m gonna eat your delicious brain. You have NO IDEA how hyped I was when we started talking about Zarkon. I was practically vibrating in my chewed-up computer chair just... SUPER hype to talk about Zarkon with someone else who adores him. I love the differences and similarities between our Zarkons - and I still have that babby Zarkon starter in my drafts! - and our headcanons. We’ve talked about silly things and salted enough to season like a thousand pounds of steak. I love the way you write, and I love hearing your thoughts on the Galra. You’re also a very patient and understanding person, at least in my experience. I’m glad we met. Next on the docket for myself; downloading Warframe.

@bladechosen & @leaderchosen / @starchosen - Ari and Seka! Putting you two in the same paragraph since you’re like, inseparable entities in my mind. You two were some of the first to engage and plot with me on this blog, and I’m super happy you did. You’re both sweethearts, and I love the way you portray Keith and Shiro - and though it’s slowed down over the holiday season, I’m grateful you offered to help with the event I had planned. It’s still gonna happen if you’re still up to it, but there’s no rush on anyone. Ya’ll are also angst connoisseurs after my own heart. We haven’t plotted or talked that much recently, and that’s partly my fault for falling off the face of the earth. When you guys are feeling up it, I’d love to get back into things with you. Maybe a Discord group chat would be easier than separate tumblr chats?

@neurotiickind / @willowedpaladin / @terraveined / like a million other blogs - ALLY. Ally, you are a fucking gift unto this world. You’re hilarious and sweet and so easy to talk to. You were the first person to interact with me on this blog, and I’ve always been super grateful for that. I’m pretty sure I said it before in an ask, but you really helped me get comfortable in the VLD community. And holy shit, every muse you play you play them so well?? Hunk is the one I’ve interacted with most, and he’s such a cinnamon roll - but you know to let him have faults, and how to balance out his character. I love the way you write him, and I love his interactions with Zarkon - both crack and serious rp. The crack gives me life though, ngl.

@two-paladins - Ah yes, the culprit behind me developing a love for Zarkon/Trigel, both platonic and romantic. Dude, I was so hyped to see an active Trigel, and I LOVE plotting with you. And then you added Blaytz to your muse roster, because you were fucking sent from the heavens to bless us with that good OG Paladin content. Our first thread (which I have in my drafts, sorry for all the wait) was instrumental in developing the depth of Zarkon’s devotion to his Paladins. I just... I’m super glad we got to meet, man.

@voidborneleones / @devourer-heir - And here we have the other person who has most affected Zarkon’s development. Your take on the Lions is so deliciously creepy - I love how similar Black and Zarkon are in their obsession with and devotion to each other. We’ve made so many cool AUs, everything from Black returning to Zarkon’s side to the Voidtouched AU where she takes him as a child. I just love all the creepy, unsettling places we can go with them. And when we talk about them... gosh, it just sends chills up my spine.

@lionessofthestars - I was hella surprised when you followed me. Looking through your blog like, how did this quality writer find me?? You haven’t been as active recently, and I hope you’re doing okay. I loved talking and plotting with you, and I love how sassy your Blion is. It makes me smile to think of Blion climbing up onto Zarkon for mandatory cuddle times - and man, the pain she must feel seeing what he is now. There’s so much to explore with these two.

@viridisborne / @solumperditus - I mean, do I even have to say anything? You’re my best friend, and I wouldn’t be where I am today if you hadn’t reached out to check on me - at the time a total stranger - several years ago. We’ve been through a lot since, and you’ve helped me become a better person. I’ve never felt more at home and safe than I did those weeks I spent at your place.

@freedomsought - King! I see you haven’t been too active of late, so gonna assume hiatus. Hope you’re doing okay! I had a lot of fun chatting with you in IM, everything from plot to salt to stupid silly shit. I just...such a quality Shiro. I can’t wait to see our muses beat the shit out of each other some more.

@grievousdivinity - I don’t know if you want your identity revealed, so I’m just gonna tag you on this blog. We haven’t done much IC, which is totally fine - no rush. But with your writing skill, I have total faith that you could write a killer Haggar. OOC is a different story, however. I really enjoy talking to you on discord, and now that I’m done dropping off the face of the earth I look forward to talking more~

@v-oidheart / @leaderwarrior - We ship a lot of the same terrible things. Delicious sin. It’s wonderful. Ship stuff aside, I love roleplaying with you. Your responses are always so well thought out and written, with insight into how your characters are thinking. I’m hype to get the event done and kick off the connecting AU - ‘cause playing Shiro and Kolivan opposite evil Zarkon is great, but man would I love to see how they react to a Paladin Zarkon. Particularly Kolivan.

@goofbcll & @galra-druid - Putting you two together because y’all were so kind enough to include me in a verse! You both fed my need for that unholy dark content. Like seriously, give me all of the corrupted Paladin plots. I’m already rubbing my tiny evil hands together at the thought of all the chaos a corrupted Hunk can bring. Ash, your OC is super cute and super creepy, and I love how she internally freaks out around her God-Emperor. And goofbcll (can’t recall your mun name, sorry!) I love how you write Hunk’s internal struggle. He is corrupted, but pieces of him remain deep down.

@suppressicn & @indcmiitable / @warbcund & @lifebcund - You two were some of the first to actively interact with me and Zarkon, and it was hella fun. I still have one thread in my drafts (because Zarkon is an uncooperative prick.) Ya’ll are also super sweet - you’ve checked in on me a few times when I wasn’t doing so hot, and it was very much appreciated. You two were hella fun to have on stream too - I hope you join the next time I host a movie night!

@depthsbled - So we haven’t talked too much, but I just wanted you to know that our thread (which like most is...sitting in my drafts) is one of my favourites. Lance doesn’t even know it but he is hurting Zarkon so much and it’s beautiful. I love the way you write Lance - I can hear his voice in the dialogue.

CHAMPIONS - 

-Those who have left an impact//Interaction has been minimal, but very much enjoyed!

 @iincendixm - @vrepit-sa - @beryllion - @haxuss - @cruxsought - @princesaleonaa - @silentconfliction - @galacticdemon - @pinkformourning - @rahbarii - @compassionateretainer - @intelsought - @takashi-s-g / @kings-virtue - @the-lost-lieutenant - @conqueror-heir - @iustuseo - @lnstinctive - @starredsouls - @officialmemekinglotor - @wxterbonded

SOLDIERS - 

-Those I have seen from afar//We haven’t interacted or spoken yet (or if so, very little) but I am interested in interaction should you ever wish it!

@ambiinchious - @blazerought - @battlethought - @invitoduce - @princepsstella - @el-tira-dor - @kogane - @astriium - @stasismort - @exiiledbrat - @impxriium - @exiledprincelotor - @inspireloyalty - @crueldiplomacy - @marksmcn - @galrheir - @luneleia

Alright, I think that’s everyone. Just to be clear, if you haven’t been listed it does not mean I do not want to interact! The people listed above are people I get along with, or people who have writing styles I find interesting and/or play characters I would love to interact with - and they play them in a way that sticks out in my mind.

Suffice it to say, if I follow you it’s because I want to try interacting.

So, thanks for 200+ everyone! See you at the next milestone~

[imperialroseking]

//It’s funny. For all the crap I put up with irl, I’d hope my internet life would be easier, yet here I am, avoiding both Tumblr and Discord conversations like the plague. I doubt anyone will read this, but I’m sick of bottling all of this up.

Okay, so irl, I had a mental breakdown because I was nearly fired from work over the flu (despite them needing employees and me being there and consistently doing work, the gm at the time wanted to “look good”). Despite my mom calling the assistant managers and setting up medical leave while I was in the hospital, the gm fired me anyways, handing me termination papers an hour after I left the hospital. Best part: she was a temp manager training for a district manager position, so she gets to get away with stuff like that and overworking her staff, even making an assistant manager cry.

My mom is on vacation in California. Did I get invited? Hell no! My sister did, my brother did, but not me. I haven’t had a vacation in years and even missed one of my sisters’ weddings because my mom wouldn’t find a pet sitter. They’re just cats. They only need food. Our neighbor owns cats and can help, but nah, I missed a wedding.

And then my mom has the gall to say I need to go out more...

My dad is even worse. Due to my mom being gone, I need to take care of the house and everyone in it (mostly traded my mom for my dad, same difference otherwise). My dad won’t take me grocery shopping and did it on his own with my brother (they didn’t get half of what I wanted and even wrote down for the trip). Then, he decides to blame me for missing doctor’s appointments and job calls because I’m busy sleeping after trying to get my brother to work (he keeps his job despite always being late and arguing with his managers...) and dealing with cats in heat.

My sister cane once. My other hasn’t even called. No one else cares.

So you’d think with that shitty hand that I could just relax on the internet, RP, play games, and talk to friends. But even that is a joke. I won’t name names, but between the cliques on here, backstabbing, talking behind people’s backs, rumors, and even disrespect for my muse, I’m done. I’m fried. I want nothing more than to put this blog on indefinite hiatus and run to another fandom.

But I can’t. I know I can’t. You guys see me as a mascot for FFII, some sort of inspiration for lesser known characters, and someone to confide in. Hell, the amount of warmth I got when I returned to posting here was overwhelming. It sucks that I’m trapped in the hole I was stuck in years ago all over again.

I would put up another crowdfund thing, but no one ever pays attention to those unless the person is dying of stage 4 cancer. Someone who’s poor, is emotionally abused, and keeps getting laid off for bullshit reasons? Not a cent.

At least my meds work now. No thanks to my psychiatrist. The asshat even had the gall to get angry with me for going into the hospital and telling them he didn’t listen to me when I said my meds didn’t work. Yet he’s one of the only doctors who will accept my insurance.

Fuck my life. 

[for-gxd-and-glxry-blog]

psa.

Mun Shuu: ASDFGHJKL Mun Shuu: I’m so sorry. I know, I haven’t been giving this blog so much attention... Mun Shuu: And I REALLLY apologize for those who have been awaiting a response from me for some time Mun Shuu: My muse for this blog has just been...non-existent Mun Shuu: I’ve been working on other blogs--particularly those in the BSD fandom Mun Shuu: And kind of...left this one behind Mun Shuu: I’m not...deleting this, but I am putting it on hiatus until something comes along Mun Shuu: I might be bringing back Rex, but with a bit of a...twist... Mun Shuu: If you wish to still interact w/ me, you can find me over @deceivermun and all the sideblogs that can be found there Mun Shuu: I apologize for those who also just started following this blog, but I really cannot write for these muses right now and it makes me feel really guilty Mun Shuu: I STILL wanna talk w/ you, but I’ve just been so deep in the BSD fandom... Mun Shuu: For those of you who STILL wanna RP w/ me (and aren’t too mad), I’ll provide the links to the other RPing blogs I have over there below. Thank you for being patient w/ me. I really don’t deserve it;;;

@mislxdged-bullets @hcllfxre @suicidxlart @the-great-fitziisms @yewretched

[agron-rebel-general]

What happened to the Spartacus family blog? I loved the idea.

AWWWW THANK YOU SO MUCH ANON!!!!! SO I got this message I guess a little after my Hiatus and feel like I should explain the idea behind the blog because I think a few people didn’t really fully understand it!! SO… here we go!!

This blog was not just created on a whim!! I did it with the consideration of many people and a lot of things people have said to me in the past!! People have told me they feel left out in this fandom, and that they don’t fit in, and have no sense of belonging. THIS broke my heart!! I myself have felt that way SO often until I made a couple of REALLY close friends who have supported me and allow me to enjoy tumblr! But I KNOW those feelings of being ostracized and the fact that it came from so many others, made me feel more validated because I realized its not JUST me who feels this way!!   

THIS, was how the idea came out! I wanted to make a central blog that EVERYONE could have fun in ! People new in the fandom could find a singular place where all other Spartacus blogs would be listed (there was just a short application for that) AND it would be frequently  updated so that it wasn’t just one singular list of blogs but a place that would continue to grow and build.  

ANOTHER thing that people have told me is that they wish they got more asks and memes because sometimes they don’t get any and it can be discouraging. Again, this was something else I was going to incorporate  into the blog. AND, furthermore, it wasn’t JUST selective to people who have ‘claimed characters’. I was willing to put in that extra work of sending asks and organizing themed memes for anyone who wished to receive them! Whether it was more than one Mira, more than one Nasir, more than one Saxa, etc!  It was literally for anyone in the fandom who wanted it!!

In regards to claiming a character, this was legit only for in character chats I was going to organize, most likely off site. Any group out of character chats  was open for anyone! But those IC chats was literally the only thing about claiming a character because I felt it would be too confusing if we had like 3 Spartacus’ in the chat, or 3 Agrons.

Apart from themed memes, group listings, asks (IC and OOC), I was also going to organize a Spartacus rewatch. ALL of the  above activities was for EVERYONE, NOT just a select group of players. This would give everyone a sense of belonging as the blog was meant to be community building and NOT exclusive at all. Group rps are usually like this but I wanted to go beyond that and make a central place for every single rper with a Spartacus muse (canon or OC) OR a Spartacus verse for their OC! As well as involve non rpers who wanted to just talk about the show or meet fellow Spartacus fans! Which was why it was called the Spartacus Family! 

I have NOT given up on this idea!! Actually, people I’ve talked to or reached out to me, REALLLYY loved the idea!!! They thought it was a great way to involve everyone and give people new to the fandom a starting point and place to meet other Spartacus rpers!!  I am still going to do this or something VERY similar! I believe in promoting inclusivity, positivity and community building !! The blog is meant for that so THANK YOU to all those who supported it!!! Fandoms should never be led by just one or two people!! It should be a place for EVERYONE and with the feedback and comments from others, I want to help develop that and include every single person in that process!!

So I may also be looking for mods to help me run this!! But I am still working out some details so just hang tight!!

I LOVE YOU GUYSS!!! THANK YOUU to all those who supported the idea, and continue to !! I would also like to thank ALL feedback, especially those who were VERY polite and respectful about it as they worked to understand the idea!! STAY POSITIVE EVERYONE!! MUCH LOVE AND HUGS!!! AND THANK YOU AGAIN ANON FOR YOUR LOVELY MESSAGE!!!

[puzzles-and-emotional-issues]

Hey everyone. I’m sorry this message is coming so late in the game, I know I’ve been absent for a while now. I’ve been meaning to post it sooner, but finding the time has been difficult, to say the least. I’ll put the rest of this under a read more line, so feel free to scroll past.

First off, I just want to say that I’m sorry I haven’t been active at all recently. I know I’m very behind on all of my threads, and I apologize to anyone that I RP with for not being able to reply. The place that I’m at right now has gone from bad to worse, and certain circumstances have caused my home life to become very volatile and unstable. 

Because of that, finding time to continue RPing has been extremely difficult, and any time that I do have, my muse has been too low. I don’t want to bore you all with the details, but long story short, things have deteriorated to the point where I’m not even sure where I’ll be in the next couple weeks.

I don’t, under any circumstance, plan to abandon this blog altogether. I love all of my RP partners, and being able to write with you all has made me happier than I can even express. But with the way things are right now, continuing to write with you all doesn’t seem very probable, both because of time restraints and my lack of muse. I want to be able to give our threads the best energy and creativity that I can, and right now that’s just not something that I’m able to do.

So, for the time being, I’m going to be putting this blog on a much needed hiatus. I definitely do plan to come back, but until things calm down and I get everything figured out, I’m not sure when that’ll be. Once again, I’m really sorry to all of my followers, and especially to all of my RP partners. I hope one day soon we’ll be able to pick up where we left off.

Thank you so much for your time and patience, and I wish you all the best.

PAEI<3

[magicgeekponsol-blog]

♛ (for mismatcheddoll. I swear I don't hate you. please don't kill me.)

Taken from meme: [x] ||Accepting|| ((Now why would I hate you for this. My back may be unhappy but i’m perfectly fine. lol))

Makes more sense to put both on one ask answer, yes yes? Third times the charm to answer two urls at once. //sob cry

@mismatcheddoll​ @tsundere-model​ @knights-queen​ (bc of your ask answer is here)

my opinion on;

character in general: Ahhh Mika, what a cute lil thing. So I don’t know too much about him because I don’t actually play Ensemble stars? I only know what I kow from what aoi or Izuzu tell me. lol If I’m remembering correctly, didn’t Shu find Mika in like a box or something? A dumpster? Whatever it was, he was alone. This would probably be a reason why he’s so attached to ‘Oshi-san’? I think he has a complex about his two eyes? Idk if it’s because of Shu or not, but he doesn’t seem to like them very much. 

Obviously he’s also just really... he’s just a meek child, honestly. Still he tries. I know he’s apparently got weak sense of feeling? So stabbing his thumb with a needle was like ‘oh there’s blood’. I know he’s very close to Arashi. I’m very sure I remember a part where it’s like he wanted to make a bouquet or something for Arashi as thanks? I could be wrong, but I swear there was something about that. So pretty much he’s a bit clumsy (I think?) and very awkward but he does try hard. He’s doing his best. He gets scared easily and what not but that’s understandable if you think about how he was introduced. Child probably went through a lot but he still tries to be happy and friendly. A good child. 

how they play them: I believe Izuzu is doing a fabulous job. Poor child makes my cold... dead heart... do a thing called skip a beat. Can’t be mean to him. I have a Spritz bottle on standby for when Ponsol is interacting. I’m warning you dude. You can see how he struggles and is very scared and insecure, but he is very earnest and very very honest to a fault. Even when scared, he will still try to do what’s right. This is Pre-hiatus but Mika, though Shugarl is a scary-ass dude was wondering if they should kiss because they both got caught under the mistletoe like ‘don’t you get bad luck if you don’t?’ Child, worry about yourself, don’t worry about him. He needs bad luck. I meant what? I said nothing. He’s just  a boy who needs guidance and love, that’s all. 

He’s written in a way that you can tell he’s got social and anxiety issues. He isn’t really down played. He’s a loving character and he’s fair. Though Vasco is scary, Mika could see that he’d hurt the guy and honestly could have left it at that, but didn’t. He does what is right. Just an all around ‘good boy’. So If Mika is supposed to be a good boy chara who is supposed to melt your heart with purity and also just all around general pity, then yeah, Izuzu is doing great. //sheds tear for Mika

the mun: Ahhh okay. Let’s do this. //cracks knuckles and stretches back. So I said this in a previous meme wwaaayyyyyyy back when, but Izuzu was the first and only one to answer to Vasco’s very first open starter. One that went ignored for a long while.Discouraged, but otherwise //shruuuuuuug. Izumi was well... Izumi, but I still appreciated the notion. Not too long after that was Monster Madnes, the first event I was a part of. Izuzu wrote up a heavy drabble and it honestly made me fear of Vasco’s life and I was more than willing to get Vasco out of there. lol. Izuzu already knows this, but i’m sure others are curious? I don’t do well with Yandere themes so I was just ‘ABORT MISSION!!!!!’ Though Izumi is pretty... tame for the most part. 

We talked a lot on im and I got to see many characters from her. Some who came and went and some who stayed behind and are here today. I do love interacting with Izuzu. If you have an idea there is a 98% chance she’ll say yes. Actively HC’ing with Izuzu is fun who also is very serious about characters. Izuzu, like myself, connects with her muses. Some more than others. I connect real well with Shugarl while I think Izuzu connects well with Izumi. It always makes for a fun thread experience and it just feels... natural? When Shugarl gets mad, I get mad. lol Now English isn’t her first language. She is learning, but even so she writes pretty well, wouldn’t you think? Perhaps a few minor mistakes here and there, but for the most part she writes well. 

I really like her use of vocabulary and descriptions. That was honestly what drew me to her in the first place. (I don’t think Izuzu knows this. hoh hoh) So we talk a lot about random things all the time. For some reason, idk why, but she really likes Ponsol. Like a lot. So I appreciate that. He used to get real neglected. OTL ALSO SHE KNOWS EYESHIELD 21 SO I CAN USE MY REFERENCES IN THREADS. YAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I guess one word of sorta warning is that Izuzu (like myself) can ramble a lot so threads can get real long... real quick. So if you can’t handle really long threads... exercise caution. Izuzu can certainly go short but longer is so much fun. I so understand. As for reply speed which may be another cause of concern, with a lot of blogs and groups, it’s hard to keep on top of things. If anything, Izuzu has a lot on her plate but still tries hard. I really respect that. 

do i;

follow them: Ye ye

rp with them: Oh yes, clover goodness.

want to rp with them: //chucks clovers at the question.

ship their character with mine: LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL---- SAVE MIKA 2kINFINITY from Ponsol.

what is my;

overall opinion: ((Screw it i’m moving this to next section. This seciton is already so looooong))

my opinion on;

character in general: Did you mean the bratty egotistical shitstick? The one that I ironically love oh so very much? So from what I know, apparently at the start of things, he was just a regular lil dude, but things in Yumenosaki just really changed him with pain and treachery so he became more of a Tsundere. Starts to bully Kohai in order to make sure they become strong. Goes as far as to go to very extreme lengths and it’s like CHILD NO. WTF DUDE?????? //salutes a certain lil megane-boy. 

Still, with the things that went on with Knights and with Leo, you can tell he’s a loyal guy. He may not be the most honest, but he is very loyal. I’ve been told that he’s pretty much an insecure lil thing. He hides this behind his tough persona. He believes himself to be useless, to be a horrible person. Sure, he’s fucked up. He’s done bad things, but he does try to change. He does try to get passed that. He’s at the heart of things, trying to help. He wants to be loved, he wants to be useful. (I hear that he was the untalented one or something during Chess? idk. I don’t know too much of the whole thing but I think that’s what I remember. 

I mean he’s also got some issues with his mom, right? I don’t hear much about the dad so i’m guessing he’s aight. (or dead) He’s pretty complex with his personality and his complexes. He needs to be loved as much as the next guy. I really do adore him along with Arashi. Both of em are lil cuties and I love them and they are my faves. I bias over my faves hard and they are all I need. Mama has nice looks yes, but I’ll take Arashi and Izumi anyday. I do love the way these two look and I’ll fight for em. Watch me. 

how they play them: Ahhhhhhh So like, Izumi. Is a shit. A lil shitstain. Let’s be real. Izumi is hard to deal with and he really just--- angers me a lot. Goes so show Izuzu is doing a fine job, right? Ponsol and Izumi are like cat and dog tbh. Like, please stop making me feel how mad you are, Ponz. I don’t care. Stop synching your emotions. I don’t want to be mad at Izumi. STOP THAT. //spritz You see him a lot having a haughty attitude, and only ever so often do you see a crack in that armor of his. Izumi is often played as the powerful and confident guy. 

But at the heart of things, you see that he’s also but a human with flaws and fears. Like when he’s dealing with a whole hoard of girls. The reactions to such are not downplayed. The first time we did this (pre-chara reset) Izumi was just so pitiful like ahhhh child, come to Neo. She will hug you. SHUT UP ACCEPT THE HUG YOU LIL BRAT. Considering he’s been aged, there are likely some places where he may have grown, perhaps to learn to be just a bit more patient. Maybe to learn how to be a bit less rude (or hell, maybe even more rude, years of practice, and years of the sass fruit ripening). As I don’t really know Enstars personally, I do think that Izuzu is doing well. We talk about characterization a lot, so I know that she puts a lot of thought and effort into her characterization. You can see how Izumi changes with different characters based on how well he knows them. 

That takes a lot of character consistency and understanding. So I believe Izuzu knows what she’s doing. Though my word don’t have much weight as I don’t know the original media that he’s from //shrug.

the mun: I dun wanna repeat

do i;

follow them: Well duh, Izumi is my fave~ rp with them: Why yes indeedlywant to rp with them: YES INDEEDLYship their character with mine: ... //mings. As of right now... 50%? I still need to use Ponsol for my own evil deeds, but after that is over i’m 1000% willing to commit to this, yes.

what is my;

overall opinion:  Okay. Time for the big guns. So Izuzu at the core of things is a person who loves to write and talk to people. A very friendly person. I warmed up to Izuzu pretty quick. Very open and willing to pretty much give anyone a chance. Willing to give most things a try. It is good to have someone who is really open-minded about things. 

She also is very keen on character development with the way she’s always striving to become better and to write better. She tries her best to write and to learn new ways to write things out. It’s not easy writing in a language that isn’t your first one. So I really respect that of Izuzu.

Now to be honest, when I first joined RTRP the only threads I really saw for Izuzu were ahhhh nsfw threads so I will admit that I was squinting at the screen like ‘wait is that really... all you thread?’ I grew nervous, I won’t lie. On my main blog, i’ve seen a lot of people who literally only really rp smut and they reach out to you just for that. If you don’t give them the smut they get all nasty with you. It’s really annoying when it gets to the point of bullying. No one really touched Haru though. She’s often neglected-- which is nice but it also means I get so much... dry spells and it’s sad. I digress, so I was a bit nervous about Izuzu to be honest and was just //avoid. I won’t lie. This meme is about brutal honesty so here it is. 

So seeing her reply to a regular open starter and having Izumi be a brat was relieving. At least it was like ‘okay so you are totally okay with threading things that aren’t NSFW. Thank you. QuQ I saw way too many people who are just like ‘INTRODUCTIONS’ and then ‘I WANT IN YOUR PANTS NOW’. I just 0-0!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anyways, does her interest in NSFW make her any less a great rp’er? No. Did it worry me though? Yes. Protect my son 2k16.

Izuzu has an interest in that, but she’s also interested in other things like fluff, angst, and daily life shenans. Really you can just send anything and she’ll probably be okay with the idea. A very adaptive rp’er. Like I said before, she can write a lot so sometimes she and I can have really long tangent threads, and then we both suffer because it’s so long. Why did we do this to ourselves? 

I’m just rambling on a lot, but in other words: Izuzu is a quality rp’er who often tends to think not so highly of her work. I personally believe she does very well for writing in a language that isn’t her mother tongue. You might not notice it at first when you first read her work. If you want a partner who is open to just about anything, and is serious about what they do, Izuzu is a good bet. 

Just note that Izuzu can be slow at times due to her being a part of multiple groups with many blogs. She’s got a lot going on so it would be hard to balance everything. Also a student so you know. Busy busy busy. Also normally writes a lot by default. So those are things to look out for and be mindful of if any of those bother you.

I think that will suffice. Gotta save some material for future memes, right? Can’t say everything now. Gotta wait for the next time. Ohohoho. This is how I make people come back because I’ll suddenly throw in more information/confessions.

**Note: Mun’s answer are all to be completely honest. Don’t send url if you don’t want brutal honesty.

[helmes-deep]

Quickie LONG UPDATE!! (on my life lol)

I FINALLY GOT THE RESULTS BACK FROM A $300 teachers’ test and I PASSED WOOOOOOOOOOT HAHAHA I’M SO HAPPY $300 NOT WASTED LOL *CRIES*

Well, at least for my state. Who knows if I’ll ever have to take that horrendous thing again should I ever choose to move to another state or get back into the teaching profession after having left for a bit... Granted, I didn’t get the score I think I was truly capable of (I totally last-minuted this whole thing and stayed up for 72+ hours finishing it lol PLEASE PLEASE DON’T EVER BE LIKE ME AND PUT YOURSELF IN A POSITION WHERE YOU HAVE TO STAY AWAKE FOR 3 DAYS STRAIGHT TO FINISH A FINAL THAT IS MY LIFE ADVICE), but I did pass it based on the score required by my state, so I honestly couldn’t be any happier. All that’s standing between me and getting a real job now is waiting for my university to finally award me my degree in a few weeks so that I can apply for a teacher’s certificate and finally get to do what I can’t wait to start doing again – teaching!! 🌠 💖 😄

In other news, I actually survived! and completed!! my student teaching; it all actually officially ended in the middle of last month. After my student teaching ended, I focused on finishing up final tests/projects (including that $300 test) before graduating with a bachelor’s degree in English Education from my uni about 2 weeks ago. Since then, I’ve been applying for jobs and hoping for an offer soon, hopefully at a high school!! Thinking back over my college experience, I wouldn’t say it’s been a really “crazy” four years (except for this year LOL. Man, these past two semesters were WILD and took SO MUCH out of me. I still get super-exhausted thinking about how I got through my student teaching N E V E R  A G A I N HAHA :V). I’ve never been the group’s social butterfly, even though I highly crave social interaction and approval/feedback (not in a desperate sense, but I know I’m the type of person that needs social interaction in order to thrive, even if I might not be the one to initiate it). I have, however, learned a little about a lot of things, especially during this past year and semester LOL AGAIN: N E V E R  A G A I N HAHA :VVV and especially, I think, in regard to myself. As a teacher, I’ve learned that I suck at classroom management. I’m just way too laissez faire, which comes off as “too nice” and therefore just allows any group of your regular hormonal and rebellious-leaning teenagers to go bonkers and take over my class lawl. Hopefully that changes *very* soon once I get my own classroom (and I’m working on it!!), but looking back, I suppose I could have been a bit more firm about keeping my presence (it also doesn’t help that I’m like 5′3″ lol!!). As a general person, I have also learned that I SUCK at making and keeping social discourse lol. Like, not just suck at it, but suckkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk haha. First, not having a phone really makes it hard to make or keep in touch with any friends that a person intends to make. With a lack of a personal device or one of your basic social media accounts, I realized how hard it was to maintain a social network within a very digitally-connected world. Second, I realized that I’m probably a lot more cautious, super-conscious, introverted, and a bit inexperienced than I perhaps originally thought I was. Like, if I was in high school, I recognized that I would probably have been the super-quiet kid who would have had a lot of trouble making friends in class. I then realized that a lot of these previously mentioned personality quirks were probably a part of what was keeping me from fostering more intimate relationships or developing a more leader-driven personality, which sometimes heavily affected my classroom management. I’m not saying I necessarily need to change as a person, but I do believe I need to find ways in which I can become more involved and confident. Ironically, I thought it was interesting to note that a lot of my personality was – though not intentionally – perhaps keeping me from finding that deeper social interaction that I previously mentioned craving.

All that being said, I am fairly proud of how far I’ve come and how much I’ve accomplished this year as a student teacher, especially considering this was my first time taking over a class (3, actually!!) after having never really been inside a high school since I was homeschooled from 7th to 12th grade. I am, however, really proud of how I tried as much as I could to put the students with whom I was working with first, including incorporating their interests and academic needs/desires. I know my experience as a student teacher was not perfect, but I am very glad I got to work through all the challenges that came with and almost die doing it. I’ve also definitely found a bit of who I want to be as a future teacher. I know I want to be someone who is able to successfully make the classroom a place where my students can experience relevant life issues through writing or reading, and if nothing else, that had made this entire experience totally worth it.

... Which brings me to the future of this blog haha. Unfortunately, I don’t think I’ll be as active on Tumblr as I was before :c For one thing, I realized over the course of this year that Tumblr was definitely taking up way too much of my life lol (literally took me hours to get through 24+ hours’ worth of posts, and I was only following like 300 blogs). Being a bit OCD, I don’t like breaking my Tumblr cycle and only shuffling through a random number posts, despite the fact that I can’t be up 24/7 lol; I just don’t like not getting the full picture on everything and acting on/reblogging things without all of the complete info. As a result, I would rather not break my 24/7+ Tumblr cycle than to start it again at all :c Secondly, I’m kind of sad to say that, as of recently, I haven’t been keeping up with K-pop as much as I used to. It’s not that I’ve necessarily lost interest in it (K-pop is still like 85% of what I listen to lol), but I certainly haven’t been keeping up with it as closely as I used to. For instance, I have no idea what’s going on with B1A4 right now, haven’t watched BTS’s new self-made MV for “Spine Breaker,” and haven’t gotten around to watching the last teaser for SEVENTEEN’s upcoming ALONE?? comeback (featuring our wonderful leader S.Coups :p). It’s not that I’ve completely dropped everything K-pop or have become totally disinterested; I still very much keep up with the latest comebacks and listen to whatever piques my interest. It’s just that I don’t know if I want to get so re-invested with all of the details surrounding K-pop again (tbh Tumblr gave me so much info on my favorite K-pop groups; I seriously regret missing all of the amazing shots of my biases’ beautiful faces that I’ve probably missed leol), or maybe I just need a good break from it all before starting again. Most likely, I’d say my small distance from my favorite pastime has mostly happened because I now have more things to do or think about atm haha, and just don’t really have any time right now to enjoy all of the K-dynamics that are happening behind the music. I don’t think I’ll ever give up listening to K-pop anytime soon though; like I’ve said before, I’m still very much keeping up with and enjoying whatever’s coming out right now.

Sooooo at this point, I’m not sure if I want to say I’m on a complete permanent indefinite hiatus yet. I still check Tumblr and my blog everyday – every now and then my dash – so it’s not like I feel like I’ve completely left Tumblr and the K-pop community on here as a whole... just yet :3 I have, however, thought about starting a side-blog that focuses solely on teaching, including my student teaching experience. I’ve also thought about writing some K-pop articles for this blog again... (I still really want to write that “Best K-pop Songs of 2016,” a review of B1A4′s third full LP, and/or similar pieces). Whether either of those musings will come into fruition over this passing summer, I don’t know yet, but I’ll keep you updated on either if I ever do, especially my educationally-focused blog. Aside from those thoughts, I’ve been planning on doing some extensive reading over the summer – with a goal to read a book a week! If any of you are interested and would like to check out what I’m currently reading and/or think about it, you can take a look at my Goodreads account here. Other than that, I’ve just been up to the usual: still practicing driving (hopefully I’ll get my license this summer!!), looking for a job, and chilling by watching some TV/movies :p (literally, when you become a teacher, EVERYTHING YOU WATCH BECOMES A POSSIBLE TEACHING TOOL WHERE YOU WONDER IF/HOW YOU COULD USE IT IN A CLASS HAHA. I’VE BEEN SPENDING MY BREAK WATCHING THE HARRY POTTER MOVIES AND I NOW PAY MORE ATTENTION TO HOW THE TEACHERS REACT TO ALL OF THE KIDS’ SHENANIGANS VS. HOW I WOULD PAY MORE ATTENTION TO THE MAIN CHARACTERS AS A KID LOL. I’d really love to be a Professor McGonagall or Snape someday :p). So as far as the current activity of this blog goes, I think I’m going to keep it at “temporary-hiatus-because-I’m-currently-in-a-heavy-transition-period-and-still-am-very-unsure-of-how-this-will-all-pan-out??” That sounds like it’ll do for now. I definitely don’t think I want to distance myself from Tumblr just yet, but at the same time, I don’t believe I’ll be able to be as involved with everything on it as I once was :ccc

Lastly, I’d like to thank everyone who’s stayed with me and this blog so far. With this current announcement, feel free to unfollow this blog if it is no longer what you require in your daily re-bloggin’ life; I completely understand and only wish you the very best~ 🌸 :3 I don’t have a lot of followers as a whole, but I do have a handful of very lovely and precious people that I’ve met on this site; you know who you are~  💖🌠🦄✨👌 Sorry for not keeping in more constant touch; I hope all of you and your beyond-wonderful blogs are doing well~ 💎🌟😊 For those of you who have just joined my blog – WELCOME, and I hope you enjoy your stay~  ❤️ On another note, I should probably get to all those things I was tagged in... if it’s not too late haha. I love y’all and hope nothing but the BEST awaits your future!!~

Snap that was really A LOT more than just a “quickie” update haha. I know that I probably should have updated on everything that’s been happening in my life much sooner, but honestly, I didn’t feel like anything merited me getting too excited about getting through this school year unless I had 100% confirmation that I had passed the $300 test lol (it’s called the edTPA btw, for anyone who might be curious :p). Without passing that test, I probably would have had to spend at least another $100 to re-take some parts of the test, which would have delayed my being able to apply for an eligible teacher’s certificate in my state, which would have dangerously hindered me from being able to teach at all. So thanks for your patience – both for reading this post and sticking around this blog long enough to see me write it :p Hopefully I’ll get a teaching position and figure this all out soon; until then, I’ll definitely keep y’all posted~!! ✨