#(i couldnt even see them with how many people were crowding the bus. i just turned on their general direction because my friends were | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

finelinevogue · 3 years ago

Note

Just wanted to say 2 things:

1)Love the fic where he proposed over a cup of tea…so sweet💗

2) we all know how H has asthma sometimes so…could u write something w/the reader helping him with an attack idk or during an interview/concert/family gathering do as u pls

A nice day

XOXO

firstly, thank you so much that’s so sweet of you <33 and secondly, um yes i would love to give this a go at writing for you! hope you enjoy;

Harry couldn’t breathe.

He was in a panic, completely terrified of the uncontrollable situation. He was having an asthma attack concocted with a panic attack and it was brutal.

“Shit,” Jeff whispered as he watched Harry breathe heavily and loudly on the floor. His friend was currently on his hands and knees trying to gasp for air, whilst dressed in his notorious Fine Line outfit.

It was the big night. The one night only at The Forum for the release of his new album Fine Line, hence the costume. He had been nervous all day, with shaking hands and a tendency to forget simple things. You had been with him all day; having a slow brunch together out in the Hollywood Hills and then just chilling around for the afternoon. You didn’t want to anything to strain his voice, so talking hadn’t been an option. That left you either to sleeping and cuddling, whilst watching a movie, or sex. Now you were all for sex, but Harry complained that he liked talking to you during it and so that got shut down pretty quickly. You didn’t forget what he whispered to your ear though just before you cuddled into watching Bambi;

“Keep your moans for later, you’ll be fucking needing them for what I have planned.”

But that was over two hours ago now. Harry had been whisked away to start getting ready, what with hair and makeup first. You’d left him to it, telling him you would just lounge around and wait for him. It was when he was getting into costume had you announced you were just going to go down the street to get some coffee from Dunkin’ - seeing as there were few of them back in England, where you most commonly lived with Harry. The problem was you hadn’t come back yet, and it was an hour later.

“Harry mate, you need to calm down.” Kid Harpoon told him carefully, kneeling down next to his good friend. Nothing was working though and Harry was too breathless to ask anyone for his inhaler.

It had started by thinking about how nervous he actually was for tonight. It was such a huge show and one of a kind too. He was playing his new album and it wasn’t even 24 hours old yet. There was so much pressure weighing him down that he couldn’t breathe - he was suffocating in the anxiety of his own mind and he couldn’t escape at all. Then because he was in so much of a panic his asthma hit him and added another reason to his breathlessness. It was finally made worst when he realised you weren’t by his side to help him. You weren’t there to quickly eliminate the asthma and focus on helping him overcome the panic attack, instead he had his mates surrounding him - crowding him - and they didn’t know the first thing to do.

“Sarah, where’s Y/N?” Mitch shouted, making Harry squint the thought away. He didn’t want to think about how something back might’ve happened or might be happening to you. Where were you? Sarah’s response did no better to help him.

“I don’t know.”

“Harry bud. Talk to us.” Jeff spoke, crouched down in front of him. Harry shook his head, tears running from his eyes as he began crying. The sobs were really harsh and embarrassing. The tears were heavy and mixed with snot running from his nose to pool on the floor below him. He was not doing well at all, coughing when the asthma choked him up. He couldn’t do this. He felt like he was in a small box and it was only getting smaller. He felt as if he were going to die. Genuinely.

“Does he look like he can talk, dickward.” Adam’s voice came from the other side of Harry, messing his head up even more. There was so many voices and he couldn’t focus on just one, but he didn’t want to. He wanted yours. He needed yours. You.

Whenever this has happened before he was always luckily in the comfort of his home, or the tour bus and always with you. So this was unfamiliar and terrifying. He was beginning to think you’d left him or you’d gotten seriously hurt, but he couldn’t do anything to help. He was stuck - paralysed to this position as his lungs collapsed in on themselves and his brain sped the same speed as a train. You were his comfort person and it was only ever you that he wanted in situations like these. Just you.

“Move out of my way. Move!” Harry thought he heard you and your voice, but he hated that his mind could be playing tricks on him in desperation for what, or whom, he truly wanted.

He felt someone crash on the floor in front of him and the almighty smell of lavender and soap hit him all at once. This time, he was glad to have someone sit so close to him, because it was you.

“Harry look at me, hey, hey. You’re okay. Look at me bubs.” You spoke calmly, trying not to sound panicked yourself, even if you were heavily worried. You watched as he looked up at you, eyes ridiculously red and puffy whilst his nose was dripping like a leaking tap. You wanted to rub his tears away and dab away the snot, but your main priority was on his breathing first. “Okay good, okay.”

Your hand went into your bag and picked out his inhaler. You shook it a few times, before putting it into Harry’s mouth. “On three, one, two, three…” Harry tried is best to breathe in and you pushed down on the canister. “Good, bubs, really good. Okay again, one, two, three…” You repeated and then a third time until you could tell that the wheezing of his asthma attack had disappeared.

“T-than…” Harry tried to mumble out, but couldnt because he was still in panic and his throat was so dry.

“Sshh you’re okay.” You turned to one of the crew members and asked for them to fetch you a bottle of water. You asked people to clear out of the room and leave you with Harry for a bit, knowing he wouldn’t settle in front of all these people. You sat on the floor, crossed legged, and brought Harry to lay his head in your lap with his body trailing behind. You offered him one of your hands to squeeze if he wanted to, which he appreciated, cupping both of his around yours. Your other hand laid to stroke through his gelled hair - that would no doubt have to be redone now.

Instead of going straight into talking to him, you sang his favourite lullaby to him in aid of calming him down. It always worked, or at least helped a little. You sang quietly, noticing the beat of his heart soften with every line you sung. You were by no means a professional singer like him, but he liked the way it was so imperfect and mellow. It calmed him to hear something so simple and so you. Whilst you sang the crew never came back with your requested water and you thanked them, before you were the only ones left in the room.

After you finished singing you noticed how calm Harry was, almost still - the complete opposite to how he’d been all of 10 minutes ago. It was amazing what the power of you could do to him.

“What colour are we feeling?” You and Harry had created your own little system by which you would let each other know how you’re feeling by a colour of the rainbow. You’d designated a meaning to all of them that only you two could understand and used them on the days when you weren’t feeling great, to help understand each other’s feelings better.

“The whole bloody rainbow.” Harry mumbled out and you passed the water around so he could take a few sips, to which he thanked you graciously for.

“Oi, you can’t have that as your answer.” It was a rule that you could only use one colour to some your most intense emotion in that moment, otherwise there was kind of no point to the system.

“But it’s true. I feel grey with confusion, blue with sadness, purple with frustration, yellow with fear and even light yellow with cowardice. Yet I feel pink with happiness and light red with love.”

“What about red red?” You teased, not being able to help yourself.

“What? Lust? Always, for you that is.” You leant down to kiss his head as he cracked a joke, showing you that your Harry was still there beneath all this worry.

“Tell me what the colours represent in real life.”

“Purple because I am frustrated that I had to have a panic attack right before the biggest show of my career. Yellow because I am frightened that nobody will like the album and it will be a complete fail of a night. Grey because I can’t choose one colour and focus on it. I.. I—”

You could tell he getting himself worked up again, so cut him short. “Bubs stop, you’re okay. Listen to me.” You tucked his hair behind his ear as if to open it up for him to hear better. “Don’t ever be frustrated with yourself for something like this. You are allowed to have moments of weakness; you wouldn’t be human if you didn’t. Did this compromise your show? No. Did this show off how strong and brave you are? Yes. That’s what is important, therefore we can swap purple for dark yellow because you were brave. Which means yellow can also turn to dark yellow because you are so brave for doing something so huge and so wonderful. People already love the album H. Can’t get enough of it. Everyone will sing along to every word, I can promise you that. Or at least I will. You are amazing, so never undersell yourself. That’s important to me and for you. Bubs, you are so amazing for what you’re doing here tonight and I couldn’t be prouder of you. Yes, a panic attack isn’t nice and it isn’t convenient, but it just helps show how much you care about tonight and it going a success. That must count for something.”

He didn’t say anything for a bit and that was okay. He was most likely getting his thoughts together and mentally preparing himself for the greatest night of his life. You bent your body over so you could hug him, since his back was to your front, and just give him a squeeze to reiterate how proud you are of him.

“Y/N.” Harry spoke quietly, as your body encased his. You embraced his warmth and inhaled the beautiful scent that he was wearing. He both smelt and looked phenomenal.

“Yes bubs.”

“You know I love you right?” Of course you did, but it still made your heart flutter as crazy as the first time he said it to when he tells you now.

“I do.”

“And you know you’re it for me right?”

“Well.. I—” You didn’t want to get too ahead of yourself.

“Because you are.” Harry turned himself around, making you sit up so he could move. He was lying with his head facing upwards now, face looking less red and puffy, and staring right into the souls of your eyes. He looked magical. Beautiful. He thought the same of you. “And,” he moved his fingers to take off his S ring from Gucci, that probably cost more than your annual salary, and place it onto your ring finger of your right hand, “I give you this as a promise to share my last name with you someday.”

Seeing the initial of his last name sat on the finger opposite to the one he claimed he would one day put two more rings on, brought you to tears. “Harry…” You didn’t know what to say, you were speechless. You had never expected for him to do something as monumental as this and had never experienced it before to know how to react.

Of course you’d always dreamt of marrying him and being his for eternity, but never thought of it possibly becoming your reality. Now, Harry was completely devoting himself to you and only you and it suddenly all felt like the dream was settling in place.

“I swear to you Y/N, i’ll love you until the next lifetime and i’ll find you again. I love you so much, I can’t even tell you how much because it is so infinite. You’re so kind and patient with me and you see me for me, not for the Harry Styles, just Harry. I’ll never let a day pass without you on my mind and I think it’s because you were always meant to be mine. My heart is yours.” He smiled once he noticed you were crying, moving one of his hands up to wipe the tears away.

“How do I top that?” You whispered to him, but mostly to yourself. Both of you laughed.

“Just tell me you love me.”

“I do. I do love you Harry.” You nodded and then he sealed your confirmation with a kiss to his lips. You rested your hand upon his cheek, placing the coolness of the S ring upon his cheekbone, as he placed his hand under your chin to guide you into the kiss. He tasted divine and you smiled knowing that you got to have him like this, taste him like this, for the rest of your beating hearts’ days.

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midnightmoonkiss · 4 years ago

Text

Evermore.

Idol!Izuku Midoriya X Reader

Summary: Strangers brought together by music, fueling each others dream. You truly were living the life.

Category: Fluff

Word Count: 5.5k

A/N: Day 30 of the Izumonth Collab!

P.S. I have a very small grasp on what an idol truly is so ples kpop stans dont come for me ahhh,,,, i tried fdgbhhj

Just To Clarify:

Reader and Izu meet in a cafe years prior!

They built themselves from the ground up!

Lord help me i dunno what’s going on

Perm. Tag List:

@coupsieddori @desia2 @strwbrry-lia

The roaring of screaming fans, the inconsistent flashing of blinding lights, music making the ground shake and heart jump, stealing your breath away and intoxicating your being with every lyric sung from the bottom of their hearts.

To some, every concert could be classified as the same, the pattern repeating itself until it becomes nothing but a chore instead of a passion.

To some, music becomes something to pass time with, something to hug yourself with in the early hours of the morning after a night filled with tears and no sleep, eyes burning with exhaustion.

Every person has a different answer to the same question,

“What is music to you?”

A question asked to you one calm, summer night in a run-down cafe by a handsome stranger with green hair, eyes unforgettably curious and brimming with fascination, sparkling with moon dust as their silver beams shine down on him through that freshly polished window.

He stood there, an enigma to you and all those present in the place at the time.

It was unexpected, not something you would count on being asked by someone you didnt even know.

But yet, your heart had lurched forward, captivated by the determination and child-like curiosity resting on his soft, freckled face.

The words slipped from your lips parted by astonishment before you had the chance to think as if they were being dragged from the dream buried deep within yourself.

“My life..” you had whispered so quietly you had sworn he couldn’t hear you, but a smile lit up his face, the first of many you’d unknowingly see on him in your lifetime.

“So live it.” Such a cheery response had caught you off guard back then, making confusion swirl in your gut as to just what he meant, dreams resurfacing to hopeful fingertips.

Ever since then, a day in the back of your head but never one you forgot, you gave your dream your all once more, letting lyrics fly across the page as you scribbled them down in the heat of passion, inspired by random things and editing until the words flowed smoothly enough for him to sing.

And by God could he sing.

He had told you at the time he was nothing but a mere hopeful kid, fighting his way to the top with some friends, wanting to make a difference in the world with his own words and his own voice, but it was a true miracle that your minds intertwined similarly to the way your hands often did, finishing thoughts before the words even slipped out, conversations from addictingly familiar eye contact alone.

A match made in heaven as some had described it, two peas in a pod, yin and yang, Complimenting each other and yet being polar opposites, swimming harmoniously together in the vast sea of life.

One who shined brightest in a crowd, and the other who thrived on the sidelines.

But perhaps that’s just what made your bond stronger, for together, you were grey. Not suffocatingly bright, and not depressingly blue.

Just yourselves, the truest form of love there could be.

It didn’t take long for their group to be known, emerging from the dark waves like water crashing on a rock breaching the oceans stormy surface, a breath of fresh air as lyrics and ideology comforted thousands.

Evermore was their name, bred from the desire to inspire people, remind all who listen that there was more to life than what they can see alone.

Everyday you were blessed to have met that man when you did, lucky that he was willing to embrace your flaws and help you step over your self-doubt and thrive where you thrived best, smiling happily backstage as you watched the people you adore sing songs you helped create and continue to encourage all who listened.

It was your dream come true, to create music.

A dream you often feared you would one day wake from, blinking through tear-filled eyes at that old red booth sitting across from you at that cafe.

Those were the nights you would always awake in your lover’s arms, him fast asleep with drool running down the opened corner of his mouth, but yet somehow providing reassurance in that relaxed face of his, messy green curls hugging his cheeks in the sweetest way possible.

You’d always kiss his chin in those moments, letting yourself melt like ice on a hot, sunny day all over again.

Years had passed since your first encounter with him, years you would always treasure, for how could you not?

He was a ray of light in the darkest years of your life, and you never would have succeeded if it hadnt been for his firm, helping hand.

Together, you were whole.

Even now, as he’s on stage, singing his heart out in the way he always had with that same look of enthusiasm and boyish glee.

The stage boomed with each beat drop or thump of the drums, the screaming fans a mere buzz from the soundproofed backroom where you and a few others watched the performance from a flat-screen television.

Cameras never fully captured his true beauty, despite being in HD.

No, though they captured the glow of his soft skin under the shifting lights, they never could quite catch the aura of enthusiasm he gave off or the twinkle of hope in those deep green eyes you always found yourself getting hopelessly lost in. An endless forest, no, a jungle of harmonious greens. Dewy, doe-like eyes always providing comfort to all those who are able to peer into them.

Its almost as if that’s why people are entranced with him the moment they meet them beyond the screen concealing his soul.

Some could easily say he was open to the world, large arms ready to embrace its flaws wholly, but in truth, he already has. Accepting the world as it is and seeking change little by little in ways he prays could help aid in making a difference, but one human could only ever do so much. That’s the part that wasn’t easy for him to understand about all of this, about his life and others.

He can’t always help everyone, and even he has limits. But no one wants to accept the boundaries put in place by something you cannot comprehend.

It would anger him sometimes, and inspire a new song of heartbreak he would write alone in the back of the tour bus or his office at the home you shared, mindlessly chewing his pen out of frustration until the ink would splatter on his cheek.

He always tried so hard, and most people could see that.

They admired him, wanted to be like him, singing the very essence of his being out loud every chance he could.

He and his group members made music that provided the saying ‘it’ll be okay, one day. Until then, I’ll hold your hand,’ even despite it at times being aggressive and borderline rock instead of pop.

They all worked hard, and it paid off.

You were just lucky to be able to help in any way you could, simultaneously living your dream and aiding others in their own.

It truly was a blissful life you now experienced, all thanks to him, Izuku Midoriya, the man you swore held your heart oh-so gentle in the palms of his scarred hands.

Little do most know, but you held his heart just as gently.

“Looks like they’re finishing up.” Tenya Iida, their manager, pointed out whilst adjusting his glasses in that way he always did when the hours of music streaming through speakers was coming to a close.

He was right, they had just performed their last number for the night. You smiled automatically, knowing just what was to come next.

At the end of every concert, Izuku would always give a passionate speech composed entirely on the spot after observations he made throughout the show in the back of his mind. His fans knew this, and they all immediately quieted down to the point where you couldnt even hear them.

Most of the time he would say the same things at the shows because most crowds are the same- but sometimes something strange and completely unique would catch his perceptive eye, and he would always point it out with a cheery laugh as sweat poured down his face.

It would always cause a roar of screams and laughter before he and his friends signed off for the night, leaving blissful memories in those who watched the performance.

As they all bowed on the television, you were quick to hop up, waiting in front of the couch for them to file into the place.

And soon enough, he came in, sighing happily as he wiped at his face with a towel given to him before entering.

His eyes easily found your own in the suddenly crowded room, almost as if they were pulled together by magnetism, and just like it, your feet began to move on instinct.

Arms wrapping around his torso, your lips brushed over his own parted ones before molding together in a sweet, congratulatory kiss.

A tradition, if you will.

One that you had skipped once and ended up with a pouty Izuku all night.

But you typically remembered, seeing as you usually wanted a kiss as well.

He always smiled against you during these, one hand resting on your hip as the other cupped your jaw, the pad of his thumb brushing against your cheek.

Ignoring the chorus of disgusted ‘ew’s’, you repeatedly kissed his addicting mouth with a smile of your own.

Pulling away, you slowly opened your eyes just in time to see him swipe a tongue over his reddened lips.

“Cotton candy lip gloss?” he guessed the flavor you wore breathlessly, voice hoarse from exaggerated use as his eyes met yours once more, relaxed and filled with nothing but unyielding love for you and you alone.

“Mm~ not quite.” you teased, moving your arms up so they wrapped around his neck instead, not caring that he was sweaty and warm.

You knew he loved these games, though. He enjoyed figuring out things on his own, putting puzzle pieces together in that mind that of his ran at ninety miles per hour.

Leaning in, he pecked your lips once more, smacking his lips together as he tried to figure out the taste.

“Bubblegum?”

“Yep!” you giggled as his arms dropped to wrap around your own waist, his forehead coming down to rest on your readily awaiting shoulder.

His dampened green curls tickled at your cheeks, the delirious smell of honey from his shampoo and natural musky scent of sweat overtaking your senses for a mere moment as your fingers combed through his locks.

You were hooked on having him in your arms.

You wanted to stay like this forever, wrapped up in your own worlds as the love you held for each other sparkled around you like stardust.

It was just you and him, no one else.

You sighed contently, his own hum of approval immediately following as he pulled your body flushed against his own.

“This is highly unprofessional!”

You were slowly brought out of your world as the words reached your ears, not bothering to look behind you to see a fuming Iida.

Izuku, on the other hand, shot his head up, frantically waving his arms around as you clung to him like a sloth, “S-sorry!” He apologized, knowing full well this would happen again at the next concert, just as it always does.

Truly, you couldnt help it.

It was hard not to be wrapped up in his strong arms at all points of the day.

A loud sigh sounded behind you, the tapping of what could only be Iida’s pen on his clipboard whilst thinking.

“I’ll get everything wrapped up, you all look exhausted.”

“You could say that again.” Todoroki huffed, the thump of him scuffing his boots against the carpeted floor just barely reaching your ears.

“That crowd sure was enthusiastic, but matching it definitely drained me… ahh..” Uraraka murmured, the distinguishable sound of someone plopping onto a couch being heard with the squeak of leather.

“Oh, it wasn’t that bad, you guys!” Came Izuku’s signature enthusiastic reply, grip on you tightening as his own adrenaline began to pump in his veins again, “There were so many coordinated groups wearing the same thing! And, and those dances they kept doing! I’ve never seen an entire crowd successfully do the wave before! I mean, did you guys see that! They did it!! All for us no less.. I’m so happy~” Izukus cheek rubbed against your own as he sighed blissfully, no doubt amazed by the dedication of his fans.

“I guess that was.. kinda awesome.” Ochaco giggles tiredly.

“Well, I’ve set up four-star hotel rooms nearby for you all. Two to a room. You all may choose who you bunk with, of course, but try not to wreck the rooms.. Again.” He was more than likely glaring at Kaminari who was in the back of the room, considering he did have a little after party of sorts last time and ended up destroying a dresser.

Thank goodness for the shared rooms, though, you knew with complete certainty that the other bed in your room would go unused. It’s gotten to the point where it was impossible to sleep without Izuku’s arms wrapped around you, and you him, as he relented one night over a phone call. Hell, it was the entire reason you were even brought along on the world tour, which he tried to convince wasnt the only reason.

‘You’re apart of the team!’, ‘We can’t function without you!’, ‘You make better soba than they do.’

Supposedly there were more reasons, but for now, you just wanted to indulge in reason number one.

A chorus of thanks followed, and suddenly you were being dragged out of the room by a hyper Midoriya.

That adrenaline typically ran through his body for a short ten minutes after a show, so you had no doubts that he would be crashing soon, but it was adorable to see him so energetic like a little puppy.

You lived for this, to see him smile at his well-earned success.

The walk to the tour bus out back was frantic, rushed, and definitely panic-driven as all the members not only tried to blend in with the shadows but also avoid fans that could easily start a rampage, especially since the bodyguards were lagging a bit behind.

But it was the fault of the lively and desperate twenty-year-olds, and not their own.

It certainly did bring a hint of rebellious glee thrumming in your soul, making you nearly choke on a laugh.

After successfully avoiding the press and fans after getting off the bus at the hotel, you were quick to retrieve the key from the front desk to your two-bed hotel room four floors up, stepping into the elevator with relieved hums.

“Good show tonight, guys!” Izuku pumped his fist in the air, other hand holding your own as he gave his exhausted team members his signature, award-winning smile.

They returned the gesture with significantly less enthusiasm, but it still made the skin around his brilliant eyes crinkle with joy.

With a final ‘goodnight’, he swiftly opened the door for you both, shutting and double locking it- a slight paranoid habit he had, before glancing over at you with tired eyes.

It was always so strange to you how he could always feign energy until completely alone with you.

It was nice to see him let his guard down in a way he didnt typically do, even if they were all his best friends.

He trudged over to you, having sat yourself down on the bed, just to collapse beside you with a thwump, his legs giving out beneath him as he slumped down onto his knees.

“Tired?” you questioned playfully, petting at his head and untangling locks here and there.

He hummed in contentment, voice muffled by the bed as he spoke, “nah..”

He clearly was, but you could only roll your eyes half-heartedly.

“I need to bathe.. I stink..”

“You stink.” you agreed with a nod, despite not truly believing it, only for him to whine loudly.

“How about a bath, stinky boy? You seem too tired for a shower.” You feared he would collapse in a shower from standing for hours already, and no doubt his feet were killing him, even if he didn’t audibly say so, which he never really did.

Perhaps it was a downfall of sorts, how he never let the attention go on him for too long, or ever really talked about problems unless brought up and forced out.

He certainly was stubborn from a childhood of being forced to keep quiet, but luckily enough, you could always see through that mask he wore.

It was a blessing he trusted you enough to do so, and you could say with complete certainty that that thought only made your heart yearn for him even more.

“A bath sounds good..” he flopped his head on its side so he could stare up at you, “Do you think they have bubble bath?”

“If not, a regular one will do you just fine. Either way, you’ll get clean.”

“Just me? Oh no. You’re joining me!” he shot back, not giving you time to protest, not that you would have, as he pounced on your being, shoving you down to the bed as he nuzzled his face into the crook of your neck.

“S-stop it~ that tickles!” you giggled, squirming beneath him as he purposefully began to blow on your ticklish neck, fingers even coming up to tickle at your sides. You couldnt help but squeal out as he tickled you relentlessly with a mischievous smile on his handsome face.

“I-Izuku!! S-stop! Gaha! Ahhhh! N-no nonon!” you could barely breathe you were laughing so much, tears spilling from the corner of your eyes as you fought to push his larger frame away.

Snorts began to tear through your nose, much to his own bemusement and your utter horror at the atrocious sounds, and yet he smiled so sincerely at you.

Having enough, and knowing you needed to get things done, you quickly put all your strength into your back and arms, successfully catching him off guard and flipping him over so that you straddled his waist and he stared up at you in shock.

A blush burned at his cheeks upon noticing your victorious smirk, his lips pressing into a thin line as he concealed the gasp he was sure to let out.

“Now now, baby, stop messing around. The stinky boy needs a bath.” and just like that, his head popped back onto the bed with a groan, cheeks still rosey.

“Alright, alright... I’ll run the bath.” He decided, already using his arms to try and push his upper body up, to which you quickly pushed him down again, hands against his chest.

“Ah, ah, ah~ I’m doing it. Rest here for a minute. I know your feet hurt, so let me, okay?” even if you could be tough and playful sometimes, or distant and cold, you always had a very warm, caring heart. And he definitely could see that in the way you interact with others and how you were so much more with him.

He treasured it in a way that could be hard to understand to some.

Was it so wrong to be completely and utterly in love?

It was hard not to be when at times it seemed like you were the only tame thing in his life these days.

He was sure he would struggle to find one, similar to his groupmates, had he not stumbled across you that one summer night.

You were certainly one to blend in, conveniently sitting under a light that didnt work, just to hide in the shadows with your dark hoodie as you lazily ate some greasy fries.

He was tempted to pass you, grab the food that he had ordered via phone call and get out and back to his training session, but there was something about you that made it feel as though he couldn’t leave without saying something. Almost as if his very being was being pulled towards you in a way he couldn’t understand.

And so, he walked past you again, glancing down at the notebook you had wide open and noticing the lyrics you had scribbled down, along with the messages beside them.

‘Thats stupid.’ ‘Oh what a failure you are,’ ‘What type of song even is this?’ and many more harsh words you had clearly written yourself, smudged with black ink and what could only be tears as you stared off out the window.

You were a songwriter, no doubt, and it seemed as if you were close to giving up on your dreams, if you hadn’t already.

Or perhaps he was making a huge mistake by guessing, but he couldn’t help but want to intervene, it was in his nature to be nosy, and he was forever grateful he did.

Because now, you’re by his side, stuck together like glue you made yourselves.

Time had passed so quickly as he laid there on the bed, letting his sore body relax as he listened to you fumble around and the water splashing into the tub.

To some, taking a bath in a hotel was a strange thing to do, but with a hotel as nice and clearly clean as this, there wasn’t too much to worry about. Besides, your own anxiety always made you wash the tub real quick yourself.

Which is why he wanted to run the bath, knowing full well you would do this. Not that it was necessarily a bad thing.

But alas, he was too tired to truly complain.

He just wanted to relax, get clean, and then snuggle with his beloved in a bed that was far too soft for him not to think about stealing if just for a moment.

Eventually, you emerged from the bathroom, only in a tank top and undies, and he couldn’t help but eye you up, too delicious not to. My, he was sure lucky.

“Bath’s ready! Fortunately, this place had some bubble bath. I think you’ll like the scent, Zuzuku.” Walking over to in front of his damn near lifeless body, you grabbed his hands, wheezing as you struggled to pull his muscular torso up.

His arms instantly wrapped around you again, face nuzzling itself on your chest, inhaling your sweet scent.

He was tempted to just pull you onto his lap and fall asleep, but alas..

“Up.” you sternly stated, gently pushing his head back just to lean down and peck his nose.

Pulling away, you walked back to the bathroom, stopping just at the door.

Fingers gripping the hem of your shirt, you swiftly pulled it up and over, looking back to the flushed boy with an amused grin, “Come join me.”

Seeing him promptly jump up, you giggled to yourself as you waited for him, arms crossed over your bare chest.

He jumped into the bathroom on one foot, trying to pull his pants off whilst fumbling around like a headless chicken.

“Well aren’t you desperate.”

“I just want to hold you in my arms as soon as possible,” he admitted, looking over at you with a pouty face so innocent you couldn’t help but squeal on the inside.

You watched as he shed himself of all his clothes, not feeling the least bit shy at his nude self, having seen it enough times for it to not be sexual in such a domestic setting.

He hummed approvingly as foot stepped into the tub, hands gripping the sides as he lowered himself into the relaxing, warm waters filled with iridescent bubbles.

Looking over at you, he outstretched his hand, waiting.

And so, shedding your underwear, you grabbed his hand, him helping you not slip and fall as you settled in between his legs, back to chest as your head leaned on his broad shoulder, exhaling.

Kissing your cheek, he whispered “Thank you,” appreciatively.

“Mhm~” you hummed, letting your eyes slip closed as you took in this moment.

Him, the smell of the delicious vanilla cake bubble bath, and the soft lofi-hop you had playing from your phone on the counter wrapping the room in a sweet melody.

He too took this moment to relax again, letting the warm water soothe his aching joints and muscles, hands rubbing up and down your arm, the suds in the bath making you both slippery. He always enjoyed feeling your skin whenever given the chance, it was such an intimate act he cherished, seeing how he was the only one who could do it.

Time was so easy to slip by whenever he was with you, soaking in the moment of feeling you against him.

It brought a sense of normality back to his life, despite it now being barely normal at all.

And so is the life of an idol as they call it, though he wasnt quite sure how that word sat in his stomach.

He always thought of it as a figure to worship, and not him by any means.

Apparently, it’s what they called Asian band members these days, or at least that’s what he presumed.

Even if he spent nights researching the word, he was still met with loopholes and gaps he couldnt fill in.

Such a confusing term.

Nonetheless, he didnt say he wasn’t one since he didn’t exactly have the best grasp on what it is.

Regardless, it felt nice to not have to keep a forced smile on his face, but instead a genuine and relaxed one.

He found that most days he could only relax fully around you.

You always had something about you that calmed his nerves and cured any storm built from stress raging in his head.

Who knew being an ‘idol’ could be so vexing?

Strict schedules, a fairly controlled life, tight budgets, always having to be on his feet, but he had to admit it, it wasn’t nearly as hard as he heard what most groups went through.

He was lucky his friend from high school was willing to invest in this group, and it truly did pay off, seeing as they were quite popular these days.

Though he technically was loaded with money, he never bothered to spend the majority of it on himself, always putting it back into the band or donating it to charities he believed in. The fraction he had left allowed him to buy just what he needed, and some gifts he buys throughout the year just to surprise you with on anniversaries or birthdays or holidays, much to your own dismay.

And though he may be this figure others look up to, you never thought of him in such a way, out of reach and someone to scream at with joy whenever you saw him. You saw him as an average joe, a regular human with emotions. It could have been because you met him before he became a sensation, but you never got blinded by his success like he had seen before on television.

There were so many things to love about you, but most of all, he adored how you grounded him.

Even now, as his arms hold you against him and water softens your skin, he feels at home in a way he didn’t feel very often before. Home was just.. always with you. He couldn’t have a home without you in it anymore.

“I love you..” he breathed out, lips pressing against the damp skin of your neck.

You turned to stare deeply into his intense eyes filled with nothing but love, nose brushing against his own, “I love you, too.”

And so, you finished up the relaxing bath, knowing if you stayed too long you’d both fall asleep and never wake until the morning with pruney skin. It wouldn’t be the first time.

You offered to wash him, and he offered to wash you, giving you both the excuse to run your hands over each other’s body in a sensual way without it being lewd. Besides, you adored feeling his muscles and warm skin, something seemingly common in modern-day bands, but he had always said it was for himself and not just to appeal to fans or any contracts.

It was never about that.

Just a personal goal to help love himself, though you always assured he would look handsome to you no matter what, you understood his need to do this for himself.

After rinsing off, you carefully stood from the tub, offering him a hand before drying the both of yourselves off just to use as an excuse to hug. Seeing as how you both had forgotten to get a change of clothes from the bus, rooky mistake, you were doomed to spend the night in hotel robes, which wasn’t too bad either. Waddling out the room, Izuku nose-dived headfirst into the sheets as you grabbed a glass of water.

Upon him deciding you were taking too long, despite it not even being a minute, he made grabby hands at you, pouting and whining for “(Y/N)’s famous cuddles” which only brought another blush to your face that never seemed to stop smiling when around this absolute angel of a man.

Sipping at the glass of cold water, you slowly made your way to the bed, just to tease him.

“Can’t you move faster.” Izuku groaned, tossing an arm dramatically over his eyes as if watching you move so slowly was killing him

A knife to his frail heart.

He is dead

R.I.P. famous singer and songwriter, Izuku Midoriya.

Killed because his girlfriend was being too slow.

A tragedy in four parts-

His breath was suddenly squeezed from his lungs as you flopped down on him like a fish, his arm flying off his face just to be met with your damp hair tickling his nose, causing the poor fellow to sneeze.

“Ewww! Izukuuuu!” you whined, pulling your head back to mess with your hair with a look of dissatisfaction etched on your features as he just breathily chuckles.

“Aww~ Don’t be mad at me, princess! That was your own fault, you know my nose is ticklish!” though his argument did outweigh your own, you refused to accept it with a humph as you turned your head, puffing your cheeks up and crossing your arms over your robe covered chest.

Surprisingly, the robes were quite comfortable, almost like sleepwear themselves despite being meant for something different than sleeping in. They were white and prone to stains, but they sure were fuzzy and warm.

You had no doubts they would be gone in the morning from the downfall of two humans who are both personal body heaters sleeping together.

Oh, if only you had brought your light sleepwear. Nothing wrong with waking up naked, is there?

“I’ve waited long enough, cuddle me!” Izuku’s arms were outstretched, waiting for you to collapse in his arms instead of sitting on top of his belly, far too far away!

Amused, you nodded, reaching over to the nightstand, switching off the light. The room would’ve fallen into complete darkness had the moon not been shining through a sliver of a crack in the curtains on the far side of the quiet room.

Settling down, you rested your body on top of his own, letting his arms wrap loosely around your waist as he nuzzled his cheek against your own once more. Such a cuddle bug.

It only took a minute before you decided this was uncomfortable and shifted so you were both facing eachother on your sides, your own body close to the curtains, and his close to the door.

He always liked to be closest to the door, so in case of a break-in, he could protect you.

It was endearing in the sweetest of ways, though it made you wonder what went on inside his head sometimes.

Though you prided yourself on being able to understand him completely, you accepted the fact that some things you will never know about him, and some things he will never know about you.

But then again, everyone is entitled to their own secrets, right?

“I’m so glad I met you..” he sighed out dreamily, voice growing husky as drowsiness seeped in. His warm fingers traced over your cheek as the lights of the moon reflected in his eyes, giving you just enough brightness that you could see his content smile.

“I’m really glad you decided to stalk me.”

“I- I didnt-!”

“Hahaha!” you cut him off with laughter, his own following suit.

His breath was suddenly fanning across your lips, and you felt his own soft pair brush against your own, lip-gloss free ones before fully connecting them.

Kissing him had to be one of the best parts about dating him because boy did he know how to make you swoon by his lips alone.

“Goodnight.” you pulled away, pecking his nose as he giggled.

“Goodnight.” he repeated, arms wound around your body and head tucked under his chin.

Oh how sweet life could be if you took a chance.

271 notes · View notes

midnight-circus · 4 years ago

Text

sometimes you just gotta meme for the new guy.

this is two memes combined so sorry if theres similar questions i couldnt be bothered to post them separately lmao

it’s fuckin huge My Bad

Names? If you were to choose another name for your oc, what do you think it would be? Did you choose their name for how it sounds or for its meaning?

Tbh it was a toss-up for a long time between Mallory, Felix and Everaud, and eventually the first two won. I chose it for how it sounded, but as it turned out the meanings of his first two names juxtapose pretty well together (first name Mallory - ‘unlucky’, second name Felix - ‘lucky’). His surname, Valkner, I also picked for the sound - the meaning of ‘warrior’ doesn’t really pertain to him lmao

He hasn’t gone by his legit first name of Mallory since he was about 12, and has used Felix almost exclusively since then. he fuckin hates it. most of the time.

Can your oc play any instruments? Have they ever wanted to learn how to play any? Why?

No, he grew up without much money and instruments would have been a luxury. He’s vaguely considered it as an adult, but is pretty certain he’d be useless so hasn’t bothered trying.

How does your oc fare in the dark? Are they scared? Do they trip over things really easily or navigate like they have night vision? (Or do they have night vision?)

He doesn’t like the dark much, but he’s not scared. He’s just got bad eyesight.

How well would your oc fare as a teacher? What subject would they be best at teaching? What about the worst?

tbh he’d probably be pretty good as a teacher to a group of like...primary school kids, maybe from 5-11 in age. He’s quiet-voiced, fairly mild-mannered, and has a strong sense of fairness and justice - the problem would arise when it came to older pupils, teens and up, trying to get the upperhand, bc he’s not authoritative in the slightest and would probably cave. Give him a room of toddlers tho that he’s only responsible for in short bursts and he’d cope pretty well. Either history or english lit would be his forte; sports would be worst. the boy can’t run.

What was your oc’s relationship with their parents like? If they didn’t have any parents/didn’t know them, who in their life was the closest to a parent to them?

It’s...good? I guess?? It’s complicated. his parents love their kids dearly and Felix didn’t go wanting for affection, but if anything it went too far the other way. He was absolutely smothered as a kid - after several near-death experiences with childhood illnesses (bacterial meningitis, which developed into encephalitis, then sepsis in his leg), his mother wrapped him up in cotton wool and never really let go. He couldn’t leave the house alone, he couldn’t go outside on cold days, he couldn’t move at anything faster than a walk - after being in and out of hospitals from 5-years-old to 8, and then being kept on a shelf from then, it really had an impact on how he learnt to interact with other kids his age. It’s also given him an unstable footing in life itself - he’s never quite certain if he’s going to lose everything at the drop of a hat, because that’s how they used to act around him. Now, with the distance of adulthood, he loves them and appreciates that they were trying their best, but he can’t help but resent them a little if he really thinks about it. He gets around this by not thinking about it.

Does your oc have any allergies, intolerances, or other sensitivities? How dangerous is it? Does this affect their daily life in any way?

he’s got an allergy to letting himself be happy it’s very serious

Does your oc prefer being in a crowd or being completely alone? How many people can be around them before they get uncomfortable?

Generally he’s more content alone - conversation doesn’t come naturally to him, particularly if it’s a crowd of strangers, and he’s more content in his own company. If he does find himself in a crowd, he will take himself to the edge of the room and people-watch rather than mingle.

How open is your oc to trying new things? Are they the adventurous sort, or would they rather stay in their comfort zone? Why?

He needs to be talked into things, otherwise he’d never try anything - he knows his comfort zones and he’s very comfortable in them, and is not inclined to venture outside. If he’s nudged into doing something, he may end up finding that he enjoys it - doesn’t necessarily mean he’d do it again under his own steam, but he doesn’t always regret the experience.

Does your oc have any best friends? Who was/is their closest friend? What about their worst enemy?

Pathetically enough, he doesn’t, really. Sylvia was his best, and to be honest his only friend, and when she left his social life left with her. He loves her still, but he loves her platonically (even if he hasn’t realised that yet) and that wasn’t enough for her, understandably. Outside of her, there’s not really anyone else.

No enemies. He’s not important enough to have enemies.

How dangerous is your oc? Are they completely innocent, or someone to be feared? Do others know?

tbh Felix’s level of danger is about the same as a puppy with a knife in its mouth. like yeah it might get you by accident but its way more likely to hurt itself and its not really done anything to deserve that so really its more important to get the knife away from it for its own benefit than yours

What is your oc’s vision like? Do they require glasses, are they completely blind, or do they have 20/20 vision? Does this have an effect on their life?

He wears glasses for pretty much everything - he’s not blind without them, but his vision’s bad enough that he wouldn’t be able to cope for the whole day if he left them at home.

If your oc were to be arrested for something, what would it be for? For being too kind, for a legitimate crime?

Probably for getting mixed up in something he didn’t mean to get involved in - Felix is the sort of person to say ‘yes’ to one request because he felt pressured and then find himself 20 ‘yes’s down the line embezzling money from the government for the Serbian mafia with no idea how he got there. He’s quite easy to manipulate - a person who knows how to press his buttons can generally work the answer they want out of him.

How quiet or loud is your oc? Are they easily capable of sneaking around without being heard, or do they feel it’s impossible to stop talking?

He’s pretty quiet - tries not to draw attention to himself if he can avoid it, and he doesn’t really speak unless he’s spoken to.

How stylistically fancy is your oc? Or would they rather go for comfort and plainness instead?

His primary concern is durability and price - he needs something that will either last for as long as possible so he doesn’t have to replace it any time soon, or something that is cheap enough that it doesn’t matter if it wears out, and ergo, Primark. He oftens window-shops for nice-fitting, fancy clothing in the London boutiques he passes on the way to work, but has never bought anything like that in his life and can’t bring himself to even consider it.

What’s your oc’s preferred mode of transportation? Walking, vehicle, (or in a sci-fi/magic setting) teleportation?

His preferred mode of transport is a car, but his isn’t always working properly so when he has to, he takes a bus - he doesn’t like walking if he can avoid it, partially because it wears him out and partially because he’s kind of physically lazy.

Is your oc always late, always early, or always right on time? Is there any reason for this?

He’s always early, because he leaves early, because he’s already envisioned about 20 different disasters that could make him late on the way and he’s trying to circumvent all of them.

How empathetic is your oc? Or are they closer to being a sociopath? Any reason why?

Felix doesn’t really realise that he’s empathetic - he thinks he’s just doing what everyone does, but in fact he will go out of his way to improve a situation for someone if he thinks they’re being hard-done-by for no benefit to himself, even to the extent of bending or breaking rules. It’s partially why he got into the law-scene - he wants to see things bettered for people who need it.

How much does your oc swear? Or do they keep completely clean? Why is this? Is there any situation where they would be the opposite?

Swearing doesn’t come naturally to him - he’s one of those people who will swear only under their breath and still manage to feel guilty about doing it. If he is going to swear out loud, he does it in German and it always comes out clumsily.

How does your oc’s own perception of themselves compare to how other people see them? Is your oc aware that other people see them differently (if it’s different)?

It’s pretty different. In his mind, he’s pretty useless - a bit of a waste-of-space who has coasted through life by pretending to be better than he is, kind of dull, kind of boring, kind of unattractive, altogether too much of Nothing Special for anyone to really be bothered with. Realistically, he comes across as responsible and competent at his job, perhaps a little highly-strung and nervy but nevertheless perfectly capable of managing the responsibilities he has. It’s his own self-doubt that cripples him, for the most part - people see it in him, and perhaps it makes them wonder if there’s a reason for it.

Is your oc a workaholic, or do they find it hard to be busy at all? Do they find it easy to relax, or must they have something to do at all times? Why?

if he’s not working, he’s thinking, and that simply won’t do. Felix’s whole life is work, for the most part - he throws his all into it, and isn’t sure what to do with himself when he’s sitting at home alone in a dead-quiet flat.

How energetic is your oc? Do they have trouble sitting still or do they feel low on juice all the time? Any reason why?

He’s constantly exhausted. It’s because he’s depressed. He hasn’t figured that out yet.

How does your character sleep? Peacefully, fitfully? What position do they sleep in? What is their typical bedding like?

Not very peacefully - Felix is a light sleeper, so although capable of getting to sleep relatively quickly he wakes up in fits and starts throughout the night. He tends to sleep curled on his left side, on bedding that is cheap, serviceable and durable. He can’t afford to buy anything decent. He finds it easier to stay asleep if there’s ambient noise in the room - white noise, the TV, whatever.

Does your oc have dreams or nightmares? What are they like? Is there a recurring one?

He’ll suffer a pretty bad nightmare here and there, generally to do with hospitals or medical procedures, but they aren’t chronic.

How easy to annoy is your oc? Do they have common pet-peeves or are they stoic in response to everything? What is their reaction if the source doesn’t stop?

he’s real easy to annoy lmao. He’s got a list of pet peeves a mile long and he’s very easy to get a rise out of, so people who enjoy getting a reaction (Lyon) find him very entertaining pickings. He keeps telling himself not to get so worked up because it only encourages things, but he can’t help it.

How does your oc view housework? Do they absolutely hate it? Do they enjoy having their surroundings neat and tidy or do they not notice?

He hates doing it, but he really enjoys a clean space afterwards and goes a long way to keep things organised. Disorder stresses him out - he particularly can’t bear people coming into his space and messing it up.

Your oc has to make something for an art exhibition. What would they make? How terrible is it? Would they enjoy making it?

oh christ. the thing is, he’s actually not that bad at art - he’s got a good handle on anatomy and perspective and can reproduce images or photpgraphs fairly well - but he thinks he’s useless and has never shown anyone anything. he’d produce a pretty solid sketch of like a coffee shop at 5pm or something dull like that, apologise profusely for the result, and hate every second of it.

What is your oc’s vocabulary like? Does it match the way they talk? How would you describe their speech?

He speaks pretty well - he’s precise with his words and keeps a quiet, even tone, and his vocab is fairly developed. If there’s a flaw with his speech, it’s that he speaks rather too quickly, because he’s used to being constantly interrupted - it becomes a race to get the sentence finished and his point across, before someone can cut him off.

He has a south German accent, but it’s a little softer for years of living in England - it gets stronger when he goes back home to Munich.

Is your oc more likely to follow instructions exactly, throw them out and figure it out on their own, or make it all up? What are the results like?

He follows instructions to the T, and doesn’t have the impulse to experiment and mess around with them for fear of making a mistake that he’d then have to clean up; that being said, if it becomes a matter of fair treatment, he may be inclined to bend the rules here and there.

Is your oc afraid of touch or do they actively seek it out? Is there a reason for this? What are the exceptions?

lmaoooOOOOO he’s petrified, whilst at the same time desperately craving it. He’s horrendously touch-starved, but his childhood lizard-brain learnt to associate touch with painful medical procedures, so he shies from it by nature.

How is your oc about medical care? Do they avoid any form of healthcare that they can, do they seek it out over every little scrape? Do they treat their injuries/illness all by themselves?

Felix carries an awful lot of medical trauma with him; he’s terrified of medical care, whilst simultaneously being something of a hypochondriac convinced he’s got some sort of Terrible Disease at all times. to be fair, this is because he once had a Terrible Disease, which then led to a second and then a third Terrible Disease before the first could even be treated, so he does have form for it. He also can’t handle blood and has been known to pass out at the sight of it, but would rather do that and recover on the floor than go to hospital.

He will avoid hospitals At All Costs.

How competitive is your oc? Is every little task something that they can win, or are they just in competitions for the fun of it? Is there anyone they’re most competitive with?

He’s sort of competitive accidentally - he doesn’t want to be, but he feels like he needs to be in order to succeed. He is desperate to prove himself, desperate to show his mother than he is more than capable of managing his own life, but he will run himself to exhaustion trying to get there. He’s happiest when he’s left to do his own thing without feeling like he’s competing against others, when he’s content that he’s appreciated by the people around him and is able to take that appreciation at face value, but he hasn’t come to that realisation in himself yet - he just thinks he’s doing it wrong.

How skilled at lying is your oc? How frequently do they lie? For what reason? What situations would be the exception?

lmao he can’t lie to save his life it’s actually kind of sad to watch. he’s a Blusher, for one, so he’s already tripped coming out of the gate, and then he starts falling over his own tongue the second he’s asked a question he can’t give a truthful answer to until it’s painfully obvious to everyone. it’s just sad.

What is your oc’s immune system like? Are they invincible to illness, or are they compromised completely from the slightest of dirt?

His immune system is terrible - a side-effect of his childhood. If there’s an illness going around, he will catch it.

Does your oc do anything “just for the aesthetic”? Or are they completely practical in everything?

Totally practical by habit, but perhaps he’d be happier if he wasn’t. He’s not used to doing things just because he wants to, because he’d enjoy the experience - there has to be a reason for it, else he’s not justified in doing it. Same goes for purchasing things that he wants - if he can’t come up with a good, solid, practical reason to buy himself something, he won’t buy it. ‘Because you want to’ is not reason enough.

If you had to choose a single object to act as a symbol for your oc, what would it be?

One of those candles that re-ignites itself when you blow it out.

If your oc could only eat one thing for the rest of their life (while miraculously not suffering from malnutrition), what would it be?

He’s got a massive sweet tooth and spends a lot of time baking, so probably cake - he’s fond of little gay French patisserie nonsense.

How prepared is your oc? Ready for the worst no matter what, or completely lost in every situation? Would they have a medkit when it was needed? Would they have an umbrella if it rains?

As much as he panics, in a legitimate bad situation he is capable of keeping his head - he runs on adrenaline and suffers the consequences later. He carries a first-aid kit in his car, but has never needed to use it, and yes, he always has an umbrella.

How charitable is your oc? Or are they more stingy with their resources and money?

god. He is stingy, but not out of a miserly nature - he just legitimately does not have much money. He never has, ever since childhood, and that shit is ingrained in him - you watch what you’re spending, because you never know when you’re going to need to make an emergency payment.

If someone was describing your oc to someone who had never met them, what distinguishing features would they mention? How would one identify your oc in a crowd?

Short guy, kind of round-faced, round glasses - kinda looks like he’s lost even when he isn’t. Jumps if you bump into him.

Does your oc have any pleasure that embarrasses them so they keep it secret? Or are they open about all the things they enjoy?

literally everything that he enjoys, he’s embarrassed about. He likes old black-and-white movies and he’s embarrassed about that. He reads shitty romcom fiction and he’s embarrassed about that. He enjoys cooking, he’s embarrassed about that. He actually enjoys sex, believe it or not, and he’s embarrassed about it. Don’t even fuckin get him started on his kinks because he’s embarrassed about them. tbh Felix doesn’t really know how to enjoy himself without guilt or shame, because he always feels like he needs to justify the things he likes and he doesn’t know how to do it. He’s just embarrassed.

What is your oc’s stamina like? Would they be able to run a marathon, or not run at all? What about walking/another physical activity? How are they with exercise in general?

Shitty stamina - he’s got weak lungs and the extent of his running ability is running for a bus and then needing literally four hours to recover. He sort of makes a vague attempt to exercise at home, but is easily discouraged and would just rather lie on the couch having a crisis of body-image.

How long can your oc stay focused on one task before they get bored? Do they constantly have to switch things up or do they hyperfocus? What sort of things is it the opposite for?

Felix is the king of repetitive, menial tasks. Set him in front of a diary or a spreadsheet and he’s well away. He really doesn’t mind thoughtless admin labour, even as he insists that he’s capable of handling more responsibility - and although he is more than capable, he also feels comforted by the predictability of data-entry. A nice mix of both would be ideal.

What smells bring back specific memories to your oc? What are those memories like?

Antiseptic and rubber floors, with that underlying stink of sickness. They’re not good memories.

How jumpy or easily spooked is your oc? Do they have a fight or flight reflex to being startled, or are they never startled at all?

He’s super-jumpy and easy to startle, which is delightful to some people. Between fight or flight, he’ll fly.

How polite is your oc? Do they do everything with the utmost courtesy, or do they completely refuse to say please and thank you?

He’s unfailingly polite, because his mother would have beat him with a shoe if he wasn’t.

How flexible is your oc? Can they touch their toes or do they have trouble just sitting down because of how stiff they are?

He doesn’t think he’s flexible at all, but certain intercurricular activities with Lyon suggest that he’s more flexible than he thinks he is.

What is your oc’s typical walking like? Do they speed-walk everywhere, do they take quick short steps or long paces? How loud are their footsteps?

Because his legs are kinda short, he walks pretty quickly just to be able to keep up with people - quiet steps, because he’s trying not to draw attention to himself.

If your oc was in a video game, what would their idle animation be?

Cleaning his glasses, putting them back on, squinting through them, then taking them off and cleaning them again ad infinitum.

What topics does your oc know the most about? Are these obvious or would these be surprising to others?

He’s a talented cook and has absorbed quite a lot about flavour profiles and all that shit that I know nothing about so I’m not going into details lmao. He’s also got a bank of knowledge about classic films that he keeps to himself, as he’s never convinced anyone would be interested. He’s got a lot of shit that he keeps to himself for this same reason, and therefore there’s quite a lot he could surprise people with if the right topics came up.

What time of day is your oc most awake? What about most tired? Do they get up at the same time every morning without need of an alarm, or is their sleep schedule all over the place?

Tries to tell himself he’s a morning-person. He isn’t. Left to his own devices he’d wake up about 10 and fall asleep about 2am, but he’ll insist if asked that he’s naturally inclined to wake up early.

What would someone blackmail your oc with? Would they be successful in getting what they wanted?

they’d get hold of a list of his pornhub browsing history and yes, they would absolutely be successful.

How easily does your oc get attached to things? Does everything have a sentimental value to them, or do they see nothing as more valuable than its practical use? What about with people/animals?

He gets attached to people and animals very easily, but as for things - he gets angry when he breaks or loses items, but that’s more to do with being stressed about having to pay to replace them than anything sentimental. He’s thrifty to a fault and won’t throw anything out until it’s absolutely unusable, to the point that he’s gotten pretty skilled at sewing repairs in order to avoid getting rid of clothes. He does have sentimental attachments to a few things, but not the majority.

How stubborn is your oc? Are they easily convinced of the opposite opinion, do they not agree but let it happen anyways? Or do they cause conflicts with their inability to budge in their decisions?

He’s not stubborn, as such, but he does know his own mind. He can be talked around or into things quite easily, but he does like to feel as though his voice has been heard.

How much has your oc traveled? Why is this? Would they like to travel more? Or are they perfectly fine with staying home?

He’d prefer to stay home - there’s too much room for error travelling abroad, and the risks don’t really outweigh the benefits for him. He travels back and forth between England and Germany, and he has visited France before as a boy, but that’s about it.

What signs tell that your oc is nervous? Do they fidget, is it in their expression or the way they say things? Or are they very skilled at hiding it?

He fiddles with his glasses and fidgets his hands around, and is also (as mentioned) a blusher - he’s Not Subtle when he’s nervous or flustered, which in turn makes it worse.

How superstitious your oc? Do they end up following them ‘just in case’? Or are superstitions incredibly important to your oc? What are some that they believe? What about the ones they don’t?

He says he isn’t superstitious, but I’m not certain that’s true - I think he’s superstitious despite himself. He follows them, then gets annoyed with himself for following them and assures himself that he won’t do it again, but then when it comes to it next time he follows them again anyway. He won’t walk under ladders, won’t open an umbrella indoors and he broke a mirror once and almost died. The only one he doesn’t believe is unlucky black cats, because he’s never met a black cat that was unpleasant.

#felix1 #god PLEASE let the cut work this is huge

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missbunnyz · 6 years ago

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Dear Taylor,

I cant count the number of times on two hands, over the past thirteen years I've been following you and your music, that I've started to write to you only to scrap it because I was either too shy or felt anything I had to say you probably have heard many times over.

But not today. I've decided to write an open letter to you because you've inspired me to come out of my shell, and I think Tumblr is the best way to get your attention 😊💜♠️.

Hi Taylor! My name is Tyler (female) 😊. I have so much to say, I dont even know where to start.

I'm twenty-four years old and from a town about 35 minutes from where you grew up in Pennsylvania! I am currently attending Kutztown University 😊. Like many other older fans (and I know, totally not original), I discovered you when I was eleven and heard your single "Tear Drops On My Guitar" on the radio. I asked my dad to buy me the CD, which he did. I remember spending hours on my dads back porch listening to your debut album on my little portable CD player.

When your Fearless album came out, I was a freshman in highschool, just a few years shy of your song Fifteen. But nonetheless, it still sat with me. I listened to it almost every morning of my freshman year on the morning bus ride to school.

I actually find it kind of funny that your Speak Now album actually reflected a lot of my thoughts and feelings at the time I was a sophomore in highschool, just 16 years old: Sad. Depressed. Kind of angry. But still we both had so much love inside us, and for you I can see that clearly within your songs.

One of my favorite songs of yours is All Too Well. I've listened to it countless times, crying with you through the song. Lyrically, it's so beautiful and cleverly stitched together. It's such a shame that you received so much hate during the Red Era, and I've cried many tears with and for you over the years. I've included your story in numerous essays and papers I've written throughout my years in college. One of those essays, by the way, got a 100% 😏.

I really feel like I know you, and we are soooo alike. I was reading your essay in the Elle US Magazine and what caught my attention in particular is what you said about your mom never having to punish you because you punished yourself enough. I had, and actually sometimes still have that problem. It's a symptom of severe anxiety. And from checking up on you so often over the years, I see your anxiety in your body language.

Theres more I see in your body language. In every single picture of you with fans, you have a genuine smile on your face. Often times you're leaning into a fan, which really shows how comfortable you are with us.

I see your body language with your friends too. You are such a loving and thoughtful person. Sending them flowers, skyping them on their birthday, lending them your body guards, etc. You really care so much, and I love you so much for that.

I would really love to meet you and tell you all this and more in person. All of my friends tell me they associate your name with me 😂.

Oh! Just a little fun fact: according to my Apple Music, I've listened to How You Get The Girl over 180 times 😂😂. I know, I have a problem ;-;.

Oh, I also wanted to tell you that I was at your Reputation Philadelphia show #2 😊. I was so close to you as you walked from one side stage to the other, but I'm still really shy so I couldnt bring myself to push through the crowd to see you. But after you got onto the right (for us) side stage, I was barely twelve feet away from you. You were so close and all I could do was stand there and smile at you with tears in my eyes. I can never bring myself to be loud and scream for you like your other fans (I'm too shy and quiet around people I dont know). But I loved every bit of standing there listening to you perform. You're so gorgeous girl, you've really been looking great lately. I know you dont know me, so this may mean nothing to you, but I'm so incredibly proud of you. You've come so far over the past thirteen years and have accomplished so much. You should really be proud of yourself too.

I also really want to say how much of an inspiration you have been to me, especially recently. Ever since I discovered you and your music, I've strived to be as kind a person as I can. Albeit I've failed numerous times, I still really try to love people.

You've also really helped me be more comfortable with who I am recently. I am a femme gay cis female, and, with you being my idol, your open support and inclusion of the LGBT community has helped me be more open about my sexuality. I've been more comfortable talking about it with strangers and even friends recently, and I've even added a rainbow ribbon to my lanyard! 😊

I really just cant properly express how much I love and care about you and your well-being. I wish I had reached out to you at the beginning of your career and established a connection with you then. Having had severe social anxiety my whole life, I've pretty much have always just loved and supported you from afar, hardly interacting with you or the fandom itself. I love you @taylorswift, and I really hope to hear back from you or your team 💜💜.

With all my heart,

Tyler

p.s. To the swiftie fandom, I would be so appreciative if you reblogged this post and tagged Taylor in it 😊💜. Please and thank you!

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oyesmendes · 6 years ago

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there’s no way - 2

a/n: sorry if this hurts aaaand i brought the gif back JAHAHH

summary: when the world of a small town rockstar and global sensation meet, will they fall in love? or will the universe only fight for those meant to be?

read part one here

It had been a couple of days since the confrontation, or confession as most people would like to put it, and Haley’s been avoiding Shawn at every opportunity. She dodged him in the hallways, before and after shows and skipped nights spent in his bus for more time spent alone in her quiet bus. Shawn was dying to grab a hold of her, but she was really easy to miss in her 5’4 size. He wanted to tell her how he felt, how sorry he was for being so impulsive and it was killing him every second he kept those words in. So he decided that tonight was it. They were performing at the Forum in LA tonight, and Shawn was determined to speak to her to clear the air between them.

“Hey Andrew, do you know if Haley’s schedule is packed before the show?”

“Um I think she has one interview before, but her schedule is cleared after. What’s up man?” Andrew replied. Shawn gave him a nod of his head and sped down the hallway to her dressing room. He knocked lightly, taking a deep breath before opening the door. Shawn expected her to run away, scream, shout or do whatever she has been doing the past couple of weeks to shake him off her tail, but instead he was met with her laying on the couch, eyes glued to her laptop and totally unaware of his presence. He didn’t want to admit to it but she looked beautiful; her hair down to her shoulders, and she was dressed in a simple t-shirt with shorts - her go to outfit for stage which made fans fall in love with her even more. Her simple style yet complex mind intrigued many, and that’s how she won the heart of the people, not to mention shawn’s heart too. Seeing that he hadn’t grabbed her attention, Shawn let out a small cough which sent her shooting straight up to her feet.

“Didn’t mean to scare you there, sorry” Shawn laughed, watching as she sat her laptop down on the table.

“Oh uh, yea hey Shawn” Haley stammered slightly, nervous at the thought of even speaking to the boy who she was hopelessly in love with.

“Can we talk?” shawn asked, tilting his head to the side to meet her eyes. Haley looked up to him, for a moment, “um, later? I don’t want to think about too much before the show” she sent him a small smile and Shawn nodded slowly.

“Okay, meet me in my dressing room and we can hang after the show?” Haley nodded hesitantly before Shawn left, and she let out a breath she didn’t know she was holding. This was going to be a long night.

“That crowd was so amazing!” Haley shouted over the music as Shawn got off stage. She stood backstage peeking with the rest of her band and the venue was buzzing tonight. Fans were signing along to every word so loudly that it was hard to even hear the music. As she was about to take her leave, her manager, Emma, came over to speak to her.

“You’ve got a guest waiting for you in your dressing room” Haley raised her brows as she followed Emma to the dressing room. She wondered who it could be. did she invite anyone to the show tonight and forgot about it? Or was it Shawn pulling some kind of stunt on her? Her curiosity was satisfied when she opened the door to reveal a tall, tan figure dressed in a classic navy blue suit. She knew instantly who it was.

“AUSTIN MICHAELS! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING HERE?!” She screamed as he held her in his arms.

“Well, you gave me tickets to this show and I could use a pick me up by my best friend on a Friday night” he replied her, hands squeezing her shoulders as he spoke. He looked intently into his eyes before breaking contact.

“You could’ve told me you were here, we could’ve hung out and all!”

“I’m here now aren’t I?” He hugged her once again, the familiar warmth filling both of their bodies.

“Hales I thought you were going to- woah sorry I didn’t mean to interrupt” Shawn stumbled back a little from the scene.

“Hey no its okay Shawn, this is my best friend Austin. Austin Shawn, Shawn Austin” Haley introduced them to one another and they exchanged greetings, a slight tension filling the air when Shawn’s eyes landed on Austin’s hand placed right at the small of her back.

“I’ll um- leave you two to catch up. Text me later?” Shawn asked as he made his leave. Haley only nodded, being too pre occupied with her friend. The pair talked like old times, laughing over the stupidest things.

“Wait wait before we go on, where’s Amanda? Did you not take her with you?” Haley asked, and Austin looked down to the ground. He took in a deep breath, rubbing his palms together.

“I-i broke up with her weeks ago” was all he managed as his voice shook.

“I’m so sorry, Aus” she placed her hand on his, rubbing small circles on the back of his hand. Austin gave her a weak smile, shaking his head.

“It wasn’t meant to be anyway, should’ve known when you told me” Haley frowned when he said this. She knew it from the start that they weren’t going to make it. That the materialistic, whiny bitch was about to give her best friend hell but she didn’t get why he was mentioning it now. Two years since that day, probably one of the worst days of their lives.

“i’m telling you she’s no good for you Austin! why won’t you listen to me?” Haley shouted, watching as Austin paced the room.

“because i love her, and nothing anyone says is going to change it! what makes you so worked up about it anyway? i’m your best friend, you should be happy!” he gritted his teeth, staring straight at the girl he called his best friend.

“maybe because i’m in love with you and i see that she’s not right for you!” Haley regretted it almost immediately, shaking her head as she sunk down into the couch. He was shocked, shocked that his best friend of 12 years was in love with him. but it didn’t matter now, now he had Amanda and that was the only thing he planned to focus on.

“i’m sorry, i’m sorry i hurt you. but i love her, only her”

Silence filled the room as they sat, the only thing that was heard was the soft ticking from the wall clock.

“Ibrokeupwithherbecauseiloveyou”

“What did you say?” Haley asked when Austin mumbled out from under his breath, the string of words he had been holding back. Truth is, haley heard it all, every single word was as clear as day to her. But what she couldn’t believe was why and how. She couldn’t bring herself to believe that her childhood best friend, her very first crush that rejected her was now coming back to her after he broke up with his supposed ‘love of his life’. It all seemed like a very twisted fairy tale.

“I’m in love with you” it was nothing more than a whisper this time, but she heard it again, and it made her stand up from her seat. It made her anxious, that not only was her previous crush in love with her, she had Shawn Mendes down the hallway potentially wanting to be “more than friends”.

“I-i.. I- what?” that was all she could formulate in that moment. Austin was now on his feet too, inching towards her to grab her hand. Haley moved back quickly, her hips colliding with the dresser.

“No no don’t tell me or touch me. What the hell made you say that? 2 years after I told you, finally moving on and accepting your bitchass girlfriend. You come up and tell me you broke up with her because you love me?! Who do you think I am? I’m not your rebound, Aus, if you didn’t know im also human!” she was now full on yelling, and Shawn could hear her from the hallway as he spoke to the guitar techs. He made his way closer to the door, trying to get a hold of the conversation.

“I love you, Haley! I only ever loved you! What I had with Amanda was nothing, it didn’t mean anything at all, I only love you and I was stupid to let you go. I might have kept a friend, a best friend, but in that moment i lost the love of my life. I want her back.” He had tears streaming down his face now, desperation oozing out from his heart. Austin came here to get his girl back, but right now it seems like he was losing her all at once.

“I-i,ve got to leave” she swung open the door to reveal Shawn right in front of it, leaning against the wall behind him. Tears brimmed in her eyes as she gave Shawn a cold hard stare, storming off to one of the empty rooms in the arena. He followed silently behind as they entered a smaller room use to hold their instruments. Haley was sat in a corner, breathing hard as she tried to suppress her cries and Shawn stood in the other corner, having no idea what to do with this situation. He knew that she obviously had feelings for him, and he most probably had nothing to worry about but after what he heard between her and Austin, Shawn wasn’t too sure of it anymore.

After what seemed like hours, Haley finally spoke up, “I’m sorry, I can’t do whatever talk you want to have with me right now, Shawn. I’m sorry” he shook his head, hands folded in front of him as he watched her. Shawn wanted so bad to touch her, hug her and tell her that it was alright, yet in the heat of the moment, he could only think of himself. He ignored her words, only to blurt out the world’s worst timed question,

“What about me?”

Haley squinted her eyes at him, and she couldn’t believe what he had just said. Shawn repeated himself once more, causing Haley to scoff,

“You know this world doesn’t revolve around you right?”

“Well, neither does it revolve around you.” Shawn said flatly, and Haley let out a laugh, she couldn’t believe her ears.

“All you care about in this moment is yourself, and how you’re going to fuck me every single night? I thought better of you, Shawn.” Anger was boiling inside of Haley, and she hated this Shawn. He was being completely unreasonable and self-centred in the moment, that she couldnt even recognise him.

“I just want to know if I’m even worth something to you, if we’re worth the fight” his voice was almost inaudible but haley managed to catch his words in time. She shook her head, tears starting to choke her,

“If I meant more than one of your fuck girls, you wouldn’t need to question if we’re worth a fight.”

#shawn mendes #shawn peter raul mendes #shawn mendes imagine #shawn mendes x reader #shawn mendes blurb #shawn mendes oneshot #theres no way

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gray-autumn-sky · 6 years ago

Text

Sleepless in Seattle, Chapter 9

March 6, 1993- Seattle, Washington:

Belle carries a bologna and cheese sandwich that’s cut up in quarters over to Roland, grinning as he grins up at her to accept it.

“So, she begins, sitting down across from him. “Your dad said you were having a friend over today after school. Did something happen?”

“No,” Roland says easily as he bites into the sandwich. “I ride the bus, but Gus doesn't, so his mom had to pick him up like she always does and bring him over.”

“Oh—“

“He said he had to make a stop.”

“He did,” Belle says, her brow arching. “Not his mum?”

“Nope. Him.”

“Ah—“

Roland nods as he chews the bread’s crust. “We have a project we need to work on and we needed paper.”

“I’m sure you have paper here. You’ve got a whole bin of construction paper and—“

“No,” Roland says, cutting in and shaking his head. “We need nice paper for this.”

“Oh. Okay then.”

Roland grins and nods, then takes a bigger bite of the danish. “It’s really important that we have nice paper.”

“Oh…” Belle shifts and straws in a breath. “So your dad has been seeing my friend, Emma.”

“Emma is your friend?”

“Yes, mine and Ruby’s.”

“Oh, I… I didn’t know that.”

“Your dad says you don't like her.”

Roland shrugs. “I don’t really know her.”

“That’s fair,” Belle says slowly. “I just… I just want you to understand that just because they go on dates sometimes, that… that doesn't mean he’s going to marry her.”

Roland’s brow furrows as he looks back at her. “Then, what's the point of dating her?”

“Well, to… get out and get back in the swing of things and…”

“I don’t have a problem with my dad dating.”

“So, it’s...just Emma you don’t like?”

“I just don't think she’s right for him.”

“That’s why people date. To find someone who is right for them, and that’s a decision that no one else can make for another person.”

Roland nods, considering it. “Then why did you and Aunt Ruby set him up with Emma?”

“Because he’s a really good guy and she's nice and… we thought they might be good together.”

“I like Regina better.”

“Who?”

“Regina,” he says, as if she should know. “The lady who wrote the letter on the pretty paper.” He grins. “She likes Hemingway just like dad does, she has a son who is in Boy Scouts and I’ll be in Boy Scouts next year, and she makes great lasagna, dad’s favorite.” Roland grins as he considers it, and then his grin fades away. “Emma makes Shepherd’s pie. It was not good.”

“Not everyone is gifted in the kitchen.”

“I know, that’s why dad needs someone who is.”

At that, Belle laughs. “So where is this Regina person from?”

“Connecticut.”

“Roland, that’s really far away. It’s all the way on the other side of the country.”

“I know where Connecticut is. I looked it up on the big map at school.” He pauses and takes another bite of the sandwich. “But Gus says a long distance relationship can be a good thing because abstinence makes the heart grow fonder.”

“Um, I think you mean absence, Roland.”

“Yeah. That. That’s what Gus said.”

Belle’s eyes narrow. “Gus as in the little boy that’s coming over to play?”

“To work on a project.”

“Oh, are you not friends with Gus that way?”

“He’s my best friend.”

“Oh, I just…” Belle stops. “Never mind.”

“Well, that may or may not be true, but who am I to argue with the sage advice of a six year old?”

“Gus is seven. He had a late birthday, so he could have been in second grade.”

A grin twists on to Belle’s lips. “That explains it then.”

“Yeah…”

The doorbell rings just as Roland is finishing his sandwich, and as soon as it does, he stuffs the rest of the sandwich into his mouth and runs to the door. And Belle can’t help but laugh as he pulls open the front door, grabs a hold of his friend’s wrist and drags him up the stairs without a word…

“You should see this letter,” Roland says, closing the door behind him.

“Is the paper nice? My mom says that’s how you know someone cares—when they send you something nice.” Gus nods with a serious expression on his round face. “It’s all about the effort, ya know.?”

Roland nods in agreement. “It’s very nice.”

“Then she really likes your dad.”

“Yeah,” Roland says, grabbing the letter from his night stand. “And she included so many of the things my dad likes, without even knowing it.”

“Wow.”

“I know,” Roland says handing his friend the letter. “Look.”

He watches as Gus looks at the envelope, examining it carefully as if looking for clues, then he unfolds the letter, his eyes slowly moving over the words. “You read this?”

“Well… not.. not all of it,” Roland admits. “Just the words I know. But I can tell it’s a really good letter.” He grins. “She quoted Hemingway, and one of the quotes she uses, my dad has a journal that says that same thing on the front.”

“Cool.”

“Right? She is a good cook, too.”

“My dad says that’s super important.”

“Her best meals are my dad’s favorite which is lasagna and then my favorite, apple pie.”

“That’s amazing,” Gus says, his eyes widening a little. “Why did your dad say?”

Roland frowns. “He didn’t read it.”

“Why not?”

“He’s got a girlfriend.”

“Does she make apple pie?”

“No, she makes Shepherd's pie.”

“Ew.”

Roland nods. “It had peas in it.”

“Gross. She’s gotta go.”

“Yeah,” Roland frowns. “She’s… not that bad, really. She rollerblades, I guess.”

“Has she taken you?”

“No.”

“Oh. Then what good is that?”

“I don't know,” Roland admits, “Maybe she will someday.”

“But maybe your Dad’ll dump her before that.”

“I hope so,” Roland says, a little grin pulling onto his lip. “That’s why I invited you over, actually.”

“Need me to throw a fire and scare her of? My dad says I’m ‘specially skilled at making people wanna leave when I get upset about stuff.” He giggles. “Have you ever seen Parent Trap?”

“No. “What’s that?”

“Only the best movie ever. Twins scare off their dad’s terrible girlfriend.”

“Well, I’m not a twin, so I don’t think that would work,” Roland says, considering it as he shifts a bit uncomfortably. “Plus, not actually terrible. I don’t want to scare her,” he says. “I just want her to break up with my dad ‘cause there’s someone better for him.”

“That’s the point,” Gus says. “To make Emma go away.”

“I have a better idea, though,” Roland says, sitting up a little straighter and smiling at his own cleverness. “We are going to write her.”

“Her—“

“Regina,” Roland says. “We are going to write back to her.”

“We’re in first grade, Roland.”

“But we’re the best writers in our class. Our teacher is always saying that.”

Gus nods. “That’s true.”

“So, together, I think we could probably write a pretty good one.”

For a moment, Gus considers it. “We did get an A on that Halloween story was wrote together.”

“Exactly.” Taking a breath, Gus looks down at the letter. “I have some ideas. I started yesterday.”

“Let’s see.”

Reaching back into the nightstand, Roland pulls a lined piece of paper from the drawer. “It’s, just a draft, obviously.” He says, handing the paper over to Gus, watching as Gus reads it to himself then clears his throat to read aloud.

“Dear Regina,” he begins.”You sound really neat—“ Gus grins up at him. “That's a good line.”

“I thought so,” Roland beams.

“You should tell her how much you like lasagna next.”

“Yeah! And why!”

“Good,” Gus nods, looking down at the rest of the letter. “That's good. She is going to love this!”

_____

March 6, 1993- Greenwich, Connecticut:

That evening she and Daniel went out on a date—dinner while Henry was at a friend’s working on a project for school. Daniel suggested the little place in Hartford where they’d gone on their first date, and she’d easily agreed—Henry didn't have to be picked up until nearly eight that evening and it’d have nice to eat in a restaurant that didn’t have children’s section on the menu.

They took her car and when they got into the freeway, Daniel flicked on the radio, and almost immediately her cheeks flushed at the sound of Doctor Hopper’s voice.

“Isn’t this that show you like so much?”

Regina shrugs. “I’m, um… I’m actually doing a story for work on this show.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah, it’s... it’s about its emotional appeal.”

“Ohh, that's… that’s actually really interesting. I’d like to hear about it sometime,” Daniel tells her, offering a quick little grin. “When did you start this?”

“Um, a couple of weeks ago.”

“Is it—“

“Can we… not talk about it right now? I’ve spent the whole day thinking about the angle I wasn’t to take for this story and what my argument is going to be, and I just… I just want to focus on something else.”

“Yeah, sure,” Daniel says easily, not seeming to pick up any any of her discomfort over this particular topic. “Do you want to change the station?”

“No,” she murmurs. “I do like this show. It’s… it’s oddly calming.”

“Alright then,” Daniel says, grinning as he looks over at her. “We’ll listen, but not discuss.”

“Perfect,” she says, grinning back.

Daniel tuns up the sound just as Doctor Hopper comes back informing listeners that he’s talking to couples who are sure they’ve found the key to a long-lasting and healthy marriage. And then, they listen to a string of callers explain to Doctor Hopper and his listeners how they married someone they felt was their best friend.

When they arrive at the restaurant, the host leads them to the same table they’d ate at on their first date and she and Daniel had both laugh at the coincidence—and then something glitters in Daniel’s eyes.

And again, she found herself with an uneasy feeling that has become commonplace whenever she thinks he might be considering a proposal.

They get through an appetizer and dinner—and then, after their desert arrives, she watches Daniel reach into the breast pocket of his jacket and pull out a ring box.

She masks her discomfort with surprise and suddenly when the box opens, revealing to her a gorgeous antique ring that he tells her was his mother’s, the entire restaurant is staring that them.

She’s not even sure what he says when he asks because she can’t hear him over the beating of her heart and the voice in her head that tells her this is too soon—but he smiles and the crowded restaurant aww’s and she finds herself nodding, reminding herself that Daniel is, by far, the sweetest, kindest man she’s ever met, that he loves her son and that he loves her, and she reminds herself that she would be a complete fool not to want to marry him.

And as she stares at him with a hundred conflicting thoughts going through her head, she couldn’t help but think there were far worse things than marrying a man like Daniel Colter; and while she and Daniel might not have had passion, but perhaps they had something better.

She comfort and ease, understanding and trust and the sort of love that came from what seemed to be rekindled friendship.

So, she says yes.

The restaurant claps and Daniel pulls her into a warm hug—and she sort of melts into him as she feels a burst of contentment that lasts for the rest of the evening.

And then, she gets home.

Mal is there, curled up one he armchair with a glass of wine, her brow arched skeptically.

“Thank you, for, um,... for picking Henry up.”

“He’s never any trouble.”

Regina smiles. “Is he already asleep.”

“Yeah, He went to bed about a half an hour ago. You just—“ Mal stops and sits up a little straighter as her eyes fall to Regina’s hand. “Oh, so that’s why you were detained.”

Smiling Regina nods. “We… um… we had some unexpected celebrating to do.”

“I’ll say, Mal says, getting up and cross the room toward her. “He finally did it.”

“He finally did.”

“And, you obviously said yes.”

I did,” Regina says smiling a bit shyly. “I… wasn’t sure, but then there he was with the ring and—“

“Regina—“

“I love him. I do. And what we have might not be perfect, but it’s incredible and I’m happy and I’ve never been as happy as I am with him.”

“What about Sleepless in Seattle?”

“Sleepless in Seattle doesn't even know that I exist.”

Mal nods, biting down on her lip. “What happened to not being able to get him out of your head?”

“He’s a fantasy Mal. He’s not real… not… not to me anyway.” She shakes her head. “And Daniel is very real and when I’m with him I feel—“

“Magic?”

“Mal—“

“Please don’t do this, Mal,” Regina says, pressing her eyes closed as she sighs. “Please just let me have this.”

“What about your story?”

“What’s about it? Regina asks, stepping away from Mal. “I can still write it.”

“Really? Because I got the impression the story was an excuse.”

“The story isn’t an excuse. It’s… it’s just something I’m interested in.” She shakes her head. “I… I think I was going down a really unhealthy road, and… and tonight sort of… snapped me back and put me down a different path.”

“A better one?”

“A healthier one. One that’s based on something real, not… not some obsession.” Something about that makes Mal soften. “For so long I was so unhappy, and I spent years building up this idea of what love is supposed to be.”

“You deserve a fairytale.”

“Fairytales aren't real, Mal. They’re not and what I have with Daniel is very real.”

“Do you love him?”

“Yes, of course I do.”

“Are you in love with him?”

“I love him, Mal, and when I envision what our life together would be like, I really like what I see.” She smiles gently. “We’ll be happy.”

“You don’t seem excited.”

“I am, and for the first time in my life, I feel like… like I’m finally in a good place. Please, Just… let me have that.”

Mal sighs and nods,m and then a warm smile pulls onto her lips. “Okay, fine,” Mal says, take a few steps in and pulling her into a hug. “If you're happy, then I’m happy.”

“Thank you,” Regina murmurs as Mal pulls back.

“Okay, so I want you to tell me everything, Mal says, her smile brightening as she takes Regina by the hand. “Don’t leave anything out!”

#oq ff #outlaw queen #advent 2018

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overdrivels · 6 years ago

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losttimememo replied to your post: Ashhdfj once again Ive been looking through your...

And in terms of this specific character, I imagine most characters getting mad at times by the reader for not doing anything but then again, who do you think has fixed the interface when Winston was not avaliable? Of course Soldier76 couldnt be the only one who did every single mission strategy, there’s too many So many things that reader could have done and no one expected it, except for possibly a certain cowboy who keeps praising the lazy agent for no reason

I really like this idea and I’ve always liked the idea of just a....YDK (やれ��出来る子--a you-can-do-it-if-you-just-try-person, I don’t know how to really english that). But yeah!! I LOVE THIS.

Or just McCree nudging the reader with this, “I know what you did smile,” and the reader’s just like, “Whatcha talkin’ ‘bout, Willis?” kind of attitude.

Even better is when push comes to shove and no one else can do things, the reader surprises someone.

Hanzo had always suspected something was off about you.

You and McCree always seem to get along well, though McCree seems to be able to get along with anyone given the correct circumstances. But Hanzo there’s something else behind it all. He can see the wit and the tell in McCree’s eyes when he’s on a mission, a dark shine of someone wiser and twice bitten behind the shadow of a hat, a tightness in his back from a life of carrying sins. It’s absolutely believable that such a man would have been in Blackwatch.

You’re a different story. All he can see is the careless grins and the looseness in your shoulders from a lackadaisical life, silly questions from an ignorant one that’s hardly productive and serves to underline just how little you know and how little you’re actually paying attention to anything around you. A dangerous trait made even more dangerous by the line of work you’ve readily--or perhaps, stupidly--involved yourself in. Despite all this, the fact that Overwatch still gives you a place to call home.

Either Overwatch is that desperate or there’s something you’re hiding.

He’s more inclined toward the former especially after seeing what you have done during this mission. While it had not been going particularly well in the beginning with the lack of information, this was infinitely worse.

You’ve gotten him and yourself lost three times already (though it’s not as though those times were not fruitful; you had stumbled upon some thugs beating on the elderly who gave you both unexpected information on Talon in this town in return, you’ve discovered a new nearby cafe that Hanzo begrudgingly admits serves very good coffee that even he finds acceptable, and somehow managed to get some local children to lead you to their ‘secret cool spot’ which Hanzo insisted was a waste of time and did not follow), and managed to turn this simple mission into a complete bust. He had half a mind to tell you to return to Gibraltar where you’re less inclined to put them off track and send someone else in your place.

“Remember the ‘secret cool spot’ those kids mentioned two days ago?”

He narrows his eyes. “Yes. It was a waste of time, a child’s game.”

“Mm, I dunno. It was pretty fun~.” You dramatically sweep your arms and stretch them over your head and he suddenly spies a camera in your hand.

“What is that?”

You keep stretching, making overdramatic noises as you wave the device around. “Mm, my camera~ I was taking pictures of stuff like the stores and people. Never know when I’mma be back to this country.” You then toss it at him. “You should take a look.”

He should’ve known better than to ask and almost throws it back at you when you look at him between your stretches. It’s not a look he’s even seen before--or rather--it’s not a look he’s ever seen directed at him before. He catches glimpses of it when you’re with McCree. It’s a strange expression, one that he cannot put a finger on, but he knows it means something and he looks back to the camera in his hands. It’s a little thing, a cheaper model marketed as a name brand--only fools who know nothing of quality would get something like this. But then he looks through the pictures. At first, they’re innocuous, shabby pictures of tourist-y things like landmarks and people.

Then he spots it.

The target in the background, heading down some path he vaguely recognizes. The next picture is of a row of buildings, crowded with people. Then it’s the target again as a background, the foreground intended to be a bus. Some fruit at a fruit stand. Then more of the target until it becomes a story of a Talon agent going to a dropoff point and leaving in a vehicle.

He looks back at you, still stretching. There’s no way you could’ve gotten this close to the target without being noticed. No way that you could’ve been able to find any hide nor hair without help. So how?

You bring a finger slowly to your lips, a wry but weary smile on your face. “Shh. Don’t tell anyone, okay?”

There. There’s the dark shine in your eyes of someone far wiser and many times bitten by a harsh life. The implications of this suddenly dawns on Hanzo and he exhales, a chuckle threaded with hysteria and disbelief. It seems that he still has a lot to learn.

#losttimememo #my writing

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socialoutsiderwritings · 7 years ago

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Only Forever

A/N: based off of Demi Lovato’s song ONLY FOREVER because every time I hear it I feel some typa way.

Warnings: Language , Smut (NSFW 18+) Practice safe sex , kiddos.

16 YRS Old

Y/N watches as he downs his shot before bending down over the table , lining up the pool stick with the cue ball. She loved the way his eyebrows furrowed and how his tongue would peak out of his mouth when he was focused. She smiled to herself when he raised his arms up in excitement after making his shot. “Your turn , princess.” He smiled. She felt the slight burning on her cheeks , blushing. She downed her shot and bent over lining up her pool stick with the cue ball , ready to take her shot. “Wait.” Her eyes follow him as he gets up from his spot and over to her. He stands behind her , one hand positioning her elbow at the right angle. The other holding his weight on the edge of the pool table as he lowers himself down. She can feel his hot breath blowing on her ear. Her body stiffens as she feels his entire body on her backside. “Relax.” He whispers. She does as she’s told. “Ok. Now take your shot. Not too hard.” She takes a deep breath , pulling the stick back several inches before striking the cue ball , softly but with enough power , and making her ball in. She grins widely as she straightens her posture. “Its all in the elbow.” He says , tapping his elbow. She laughs , shaking her head softly at his antics. “We’ve got the 8 ball left.” Pointing at the black ball on the table. “Lets make this interesting.” He smiles , devilishly. “Winner gets to ask for whatever they want. Loser pays the tab.” She rolls her eyes, “Thats not fair. You know i’ve suck at this game.”

“I know. Maybe this will give you enough motivation to not suck.” He shrugs. “I’ll be nice enough to let you go again. 3 chances to make the ball.” She thinks it over a minute before sticking her hand out , “You’ve got yourself a deal , bub.” He chuckles as he grabs her hand giving it a quick shake. She focuses as she takes her first shot and misses. She looks over at him and he shrugs. She positions herself in front of the cue ball again. She takes a deep breath and takes her shot. Fail. The pool stick goes over the cue ball and her head falls low, mentally cursing herself. “It’s alright , Princess. Hmm...? What do I want , what do I want?” She lifts her head up to glare at him as he playfully taps his chin. “I still have one shot left , asshole.” She says as she walks over to the other side of the pool table. She lowers herself down , calculating her last shot. She gives herself an assuring nod as she positions herself one last time. She takes in a deep breath , and shoots. Her mouth drops as the ball moves closer and closer to the corner pocket. She brings her hands up in midair , ready to shoot them up and celebrate her victory when suddenly the ball stops. “WHAT?!” She yells. He comes over to her , laughing. “Better luck next time , kiddo.” He ruffles her hair , and bends down over the table making his last shot with ease. “That doesnt count.” She pouts , fixing her hair. “Of course it does.” He smiles , proudly. She rolls her eyes as she digs in to her front pockets , pulling out 40$. “Not so fast. Winner goes first.” He smiles. She rolls her eyes , waiting for whatever ridiculous thing he’s going to ask for. Swear ,if he asks me for my friend’s number again I’m gonna- ”What is your deepest darkest secret.?” He interrupts her thoughts. “What?” She raises an eyebrow at his question. “You heard me. “ he slowly walks towards her. “I see the way you look at me when you think i’m not looking.” He stands just a few feet away from her , reaching out , placing his hands on her waist. “I feel the way you tense up when I’m near you.” He pulls her towards him. “The way you blush when I call you Princess.” He brings a hand up to caress her cheek. Her breathing becomes ragged as she gazes up in to his eyes. “The way you feel about me. That’s your deepest darkest secret isnt it? I want to know.”

“How can you be so sure , it is?” She challenges , causing him to smirk. “We wont know until you say it.” He drops his hands from her body and begins to back away slowly. She grabs both of his wrists stopping him. “I love you.” She blurts. “I’m sorry what was that?” He raises his hand up to his ear , smiling , messing with her. She playfully smacks him and he places his hands on her waist again , looking down at her. “I said,” she rests her wrists on his shoulders , as her thumbs gently trace his jaw, “I love you. Forsythe Pendleton Jones the second.”

He smirks. “Well guess what , Y/F/N. I love you , too.” She smiles , and he brings himself down to kiss her. He pulls away “Just so we’re clear , this isnt a best friend type of ‘I love you’ right?” “No.” She giggles. “Ok , good.” He smiles , and she raises herself up on her tippy-toes to kiss him again.

18 YRS OLD

“Do you really have to go?” She whines. She looks up at him from where she sat on the bench. “Even if I didnt want to, its too late , i’m already here.” They were both waiting for the bus to take FP to the airport. She looks over at the backpack next to her. The only things he owned , stuffed inside. She pulls the pamphlet from the side pocket , opening it. “Of all the other things you could have done. You chose the Army?” She sighs , stuffing the pamphlet back inside. “If it gets me outta this town. I’m up for it.” He slides the backpack over to the other side and he takes a seat next to her. “I’ll be back. Eventually. If I dont die.” She rolls her eyes as he chuckles. “It’s just bootcamp. I’ll be gone for at least 6 months. No biggie.”

“Cant you take me with you?” She grabs on to his arm , shaking it slightly. “C’mon , kid.” He brings a hand up to remove her grip on his arm. “You’ll be alright. I promise to call you. And when I cant call. I promise to write. You just gotta remember not to forget about me.” He winks. He grabs his backpack , slipping the strap over his shoulder as the bus begins to pull up. “Like I would ever forget you.” She sighs. He gives her a quick kiss on the forehead before walking up to the bus. “Remember.” He calls back to her. She nods and watches him board. She stops the tears from falling as she watches the bus take the love of her life away for 6 months.

As the months pass , FP’s contact with Y/N went from constant to every once in a while. She reread his letters over and over when he didn’t call. She would write to him when she didn’t receive a new letter. She missed him , and just wanted to know if he missed her too. When the 6th month was finally up , He called her to tell her he wouldn’t be coming back. Not for another three years at least. He had signed up to do some work in South Korea. He sounded so happy , she couldnt tell him how much it killed her. So she smiled , congratulated him and told him she couldnt wait to see him in three years. He thanked her and promised to bring back a souvenir or two for his best girl.

21 YRS OLD.

She hugged her jacket closer to her as she sat at the same bus stop she watched the love her life leave. She was the only one there. She wished she had brought a bigger , thicker jacket. It was freezing. The sun was barely rising. FP called her to tell her he was coming home and she was the first person he wanted to see. She quickly stood up as she watched the bus pull up and stop. Her heart began to beat faster. She scanned the crowd of people piling out , hoping he would be one of them. She began to sit back down when she didnt see him but stopped. “That’s the hello imma get?” She smiled brightly and ran over to him. She jumped up and wrapped her legs around him as he caught her. “Oh my God. I missed you.” She can feel the tears forming in her eyes and quickly wiped them away before bringing herself down. “Oh my God.” She stepped back as she took him in. He got bigger. He had muscles , not too big but just enough to reveal themselves thru his clothing whenever he moved. His hair was a little longer , he had it slicked back and he had facial hair. “You look-“ “Amazing. I know.” He smiled. She playfully rolled her eyes at him. “Come on. How about we go to the Whyte Wyrm and celebrate. Its on me.” She smiled , leading him to her car. “If its on you...might as well.” He joked.

22 YRS OLD

“Happy Birthday to you,” the whole bar sang as FP walked to her, carrying a huge cake in his hands. The gang had finished singing as FP set the cake down on the pool table , lighting the candles one by one. “I wasn’t gonna risk dropping it and setting the whole place on fire.” He whispered to her. She laughed and thanked him for the gesture. “Make a wish , Princess.” He smiled. She closed her eyes , I wish for you FP , she inhaled deeply and exhaled all the air she had , blowing out the candles. Everyone cheered as she kept her eyes fixated on him. The night was going smoothly , she was sat at the bar downing the drinks her friends had bought for her. Her breathing became ragged , as she spot FP on the other side of the bar. His arm around a pretty blonde , he leaned down to say something in her ear and she threw her head back , laughing. Her heart shattered. She wanted to look away. But she couldn’t. She watched as he flirted with her , caressed her cheek , made her laugh , made her blush , doing anything to make sure he had her in the palm of his hand. She had enough. She finally turned her back to them , asking the bartender for 2 more shots. As he placed them in front of her , she drank them , with no hesitation. She pushed herself off the stool and made her way to the bathroom. She splashed some water on her face , trying to cool herself down as she felt her face burning. Maybe I had too much too drink. She leaned over the sink and looked at herself in the mirror. Ugh , you idiot. He didn’t want you back then , what makes you think he wants you now? Just move on , girl. She shook her head. Yup. One too many shots. She gave herself a quick little once over in the mirror before walking out. She scanned the bar looking for FP. When she didn’t spot him she looked for the blonde he was with. She was nowhere to be seen either. “If you’re looking for hotshot , he left.” She turned around to see who was talking. She didn’t recognize him. When she didn’t respond he continued to say, “He was in a rush to get that pretty blonde outta here. You his girl?” She shook her head. “I don’t know if I should say too bad for him or just my luck.” He smiled. She eyed him suspiciously as he walked closer to her. “I’m Eric.” He smiled , holding his hand out to her. She gave him a small smile , before taking his hand in hers , “Y/N.” “Ah , the birthday girl.” She nodded. “So tell me , birthday girl , would you like to get outta here?”

——————————

She woke up the next morning , her head pounding. She got off her bed , rubbing her eyes and going out towards her kitchen. She glanced over at Eric who was asleep on her couch , shirtless. She remembered him taking her to Pop’s for a late dinner and coming back to her trailer , falling asleep instantly. She didn’t want to wake him just yet , so she continued towards her kitchen and prepared herself a cup of coffee. “Good Morning.” FP yells as he bursts thru her front door. “In the kitchen.” I should remember to lock it. As if he read her mind , FP closes the door, “still forgetting to lock this thing huh?” He asks , walking in and taking a seat at her table. “Coffee?” She asks , not waiting for him to answer as she grabs another mug from her cupboard. “Who’s the guy?” He gestures towards Eric. She glances over to him as she reaches the table , surprised he’s still asleep after all the noise FP made , as she set a coffee mug in front of FP and taking a seat across from him. “Eric.” She blows on your coffee before taking a sip. “You bringing strangers in to your home now?” She looks at FP confused , he was angry , but trying to hide it. “He’s not a stranger.” “Whered you meet him?” “At the bar?” “Huh.” Is all he said as he sips his coffee. “You taking strangers home?” She traces the rim of the mug with her finger. “I can take care of myself. You cant.” He says. She scoffs at his answer. “Meaning?” “Meaning ... you cant be bringing guys over. You never know. They might rob you , assault you , or even kill you.” She watches as he sips his coffee again. “Thats rich. Coming from a guy who constantly takes women back to his trailer.” He sets his coffee down. “I can defend myself. You can’t.” “Are you so sure about that? Maybe he did try something.” FP clenches his jaw. “He’s probably dead on my sofa.” They both avert their attention towards Eric as he groans , stretching himself out on the couch. “Good morning.” She calls as he sits up. She notices FP roll his eyes from the corner of her eye. “Morning.” He rubs his eyes. “What time is it?” He grabs his shirt from the floor , slipping it on. “Time for you to go home.” FP snarls. She waves him off, “Don’t mind him. It’s 10 to 1. You want some coffee?” “Nah. He’s right.” He stands up from the couch after putting his shoes on. “I should get going.” He walks closer ,grabing his jacket from the counter and walks over to her. “Thanks for the offer tho. I had a great time.” He smiles. “So did I. I’ll catch you later?” “Definitely.” He kisses the top of her head before heading out the front door. She notices FP glaring at her. “What?” She asks , annoyed. “Did you fuck him?” “What?” “Did you fuck him?” “No! I did not fuck him! Are you insane?” She stands up from her chair. He doesn’t say anything. “Who do you think you are? I don’t go around asking you if you’ve fucked other people?” She begins pacing in the small kitchen, muttering nonsense to herself. FP watches her for a couple minutes before standing up and walking over to her. She finally stops pacing with her back towards him. He wraps his arms around her waist. She tries to wiggle herself out of his grasp , but he doesn’t budge. “I’m sorry.” He whispers. She stops fidgeting. “I got jealous. I just cant stand the fact of someone else touching you.” Her body tenses up as he brushes his lips from her neck up to her ear. “They way I’ve been wanting to touch you.” Her head falls back on to his chest as he whispers in her ear. He unwraps his arm from her waist , bringing them down to her thighs and up the inside of her oversized tshirt. Goosebumps rise on her skin at his soft touch as gently grazes his fingers up her sides. “Say it.” He whispers again , gently biting her ear. She whimpers , and his hands continue softly touching her body making their way to cup her breasts. He gently squeezes them and she moans. “Say it.” He says. She’s about to say it when memories of him flirting with the blonde flash thru her mind. She removes his hands from her breasts and turns to face him. “Stop it.” She tries to control her shaky voice. “Stop what?” “Stop this.” She gestures between them. “You’re just going to fuck me again. And leave. Like all those other times.” She swallows down the lump in her throat. Stay strong. Don’t cry. Keep your foot down. “You’re gonna use the same excuse. That you’re not ready.” She feels the tears forming in her eyes and quickly looks down. FP’s shoes come in to view. He cups her face , raising her head up to look at him. his eyes search every part of her face , taking her in. She cant take her eyes off him , but she knows she has to , she cant let him hurt her again. She closes her eyes , bringing her hands up to remove his hands from her face but before she can he crashes his lips on to hers. She doesn’t move at first , when she feels him pull away , she grabs the back of his neck pulling him back in. Their lips move in sync , she removes her hands from his neck and down to his shirt , she pulls it up and FP removes himself from her so she can pull it off before bringing his lips back to hers. She tosses his shirt to the side and brings her hands back to his neck softly dragging her nails down his back , making him moan. She smiles to herself , she loved the sounds he made. She drags her hands around to his front , unbuckling his belt , then unbuttoning his jeans. He lifts her up , sitting her on the counter. “Say it.” He says , pulling his pants down along with his boxers. She watches him , intensely , as he does so. “Say it.” He says , dominantly. He lifts her shirt up and pulls down her panties. He pulls her down to the edge of the counter , lining himself up at her entrance. “Say it.” “I love you.” She exhales. He slowly pushes himself in , and her mouth falls open in pleasure. He wraps an arm around her , keeping her steady as he slowly thrusts himself in and out. “FP.” She moans. He picks up his pace. He slams the cupboard above her with his free hand , as he thrusts faster. “Yes.” She moans , again and again. Feeling herself closer to her climax. “I’m so close.” He grunts in response , slowing his pace and thrusting harder. “Fuck.” She gasps. She grips his shoulders as she reaches her climax , burying her face in his neck. “Fuck.” He exhales as he finishes. He helps her down and she leans back on to the counter , her legs weak. He pulls his pants up , buttoning his jeans. “I love you.” She says as she caresses his cheek. He brings his hand up over hers , closing his eyes , melting in to her touch. “I love you.” He says back. “Do you mean it?” “ I always mean it.” He says kissing the palm of her hand. Just as she expected , he’s pulling his shirt over his head and heading out the door. Leaving her alone , like he’s done many times before.

3 MOS Later

“Can I come in?” He asks. She just wanted to slam the door in his face. After that day she hasn’t talked to him. Whenever they were at the same place he would leave , and he was never alone. He was either with the same blonde or someone different. He was purposely avoiding her. And she hated it, but accepted it. She called Eric earlier that night and met up with him at the Whyte Wyrm. She was having fun. She got a little too flirty with him and FP noticed. He watched as she placed a hand on his thigh , leaning in to whisper sweet nothings in to his ear. His knuckles turning white as he gripped the pool stick tighter as his anger bubbled inside him. After watching him place his hands on her waist and leaning in to kiss her he had enough. He marched over to them , punching Eric. He fell out of his stool and she pushed FP away and knelt down to help him. Eric pinched his nose to stop the bleeding , gently shoving Y/N away. “I dont know what you two have going on. But I cant be seeing you anymore.” Eric tells Y/N as he gets up , heading towards the bathroom. Outraged , Y/N slaps FP in the face. “I hate you.” She spits. And thats what brought FP here tonight. He didn’t want her to hate him. “Please.” He pleads. She sighs as she moves aside allowing him to come in. He takes a seat on the couch and Y/N follows suit , leaving a big space between them. “I don’t know what happened tonight.” He begins. Y/N rolls her eyes , “I do. You got jealous. You just want me to be yours without you being mine and it’s not fair. You say you love me. And if you do why don’t we just give us-“ “She’s pregnant.”He interrupts “W-what? Who?”Shocked. She can feel her heart breaking as she waits for him to answer, “The blonde. She called me a couple days ago to tell me. Then she showed up at my trailer with the tests to show me she wasnt lying.” She couldn’t believe it. She blinks rapidly a few times , processing the information , “What are you gonna do?” He scratches his head, “I don’t know. She wants to keep it but.” He sighs. “But what?” She wants him to continue. “I’m not ready.” He admits. She grabs his hand , squeezing it gently , “Its ok. I’ll be here for you. I promise. But you have to be there for her and your child.” He gives her a small smile , “ I love you.” “I love you,too.”

She kept her promise. She’s been with him every step of the way. Giving him advice , picking out clothes for his son , making sure he had everything he needed. Most nights he’d stay with her after their intimate moments, which she enjoyed because she got to have him around more. But as the months grew closer for his son to be born his nights were spent at his trailer with her , leaving Y/N alone again. She would never admit to him how much it hurt , and she didn’t want to ruin his chance at a family , no matter how badly she wanted it to be with her.

24 YRS Old

Y/N found herself laying next to FP again. He had been coming over after the birth of his son , saying how stressful it was raising a child. But as his son grew older , the easier it got but that didnt stop him from coming over. Talking sometimes led to arguing about him playing with Y/N’s feelings which led to him reeling her back in with “I love you” that led to one thing and the other and always ended up with them in bed together. Y/N knew she was torturing herself , but she loved him. She laid on his chest as he played with her hair. “I’m gonna ask her to marry me.” He says. She quickly shoots up off his chest and stares at him. “What?” “She’s raising my kid.” He begins to sit up. “And I love him.” “Ok.” She states. “But do you love her?” He doesn’t respond. She scoffs as she gets up off the bed to get dressed. “Dont act like that.” He says , getting up and getting dressed as well. “Like what?” She retorts. “Like you didn’t see this coming.” She slowly turns to face him , angry. “Excuse me?” She asks slowly. “I told you everything. Its not like I kept you in the dark.” “I know that. And i’m sorry if I just cant handle it anymore.” She spits. “Handle what?” He raises his voice. “This!” She yells , she’s not gonna hold back anymore. “You. Just coming around whenever you want. Sleeping with me. Telling me you love me. And then leaving. Finding other women to sleep with.” “I told you I wasn’t ready for a relationship.” He starts. “With strangers! You said you werent ready to start a relationship with someone new. I’m not new! I’ve been your best friend for years. Ive never held it against you because I love you and I respected your decision. But this is too much. I tried moving on because I know I will never have you the way I want. But youre always there and you do shit that makes me think maybe this time you’ll come around.” He walks up to her and reaches up to wipe the tears away but she smacks his hand away. “Don’t do that. Don’t all of a sudden care about my feelings because i’m crying.”

“I dont all of a sudden care.” He says , softly. “I’ve always cared because.. I love you.” She lets out a sob as she shakes her head. “You say you love me. But you dont..you just love having me around. But my love for you was - is so strong I put up with it because I just wanted you. And I wish I could hate you. For everything. But I really hate myself , because after admitting all of this , I would still wait forever for you.” FP stands there , staring at her , watching her cry. He doesn’t say anything , he doesnt know what to say. She turns away from him as she begins to wipe her tears away. “I want you to leave.” She says. “Y/N-“ he pleads. The desperation in is voice just makes her want to turn around and hug him. But she doesnt. “I want you leave.” She repeats. She holds in her tears as she listens to his footsteps getting softer as they retreat out of her room. When she hears the front door close , she crawls back in to bed , sobbing. Not because he left , because she knows , if he comes knocking on her door tomorrow , or in three days , or 5 months , or even 17 years from now , she’ll accept him with open arms no matter what. Because her love for him would last forever.

#fp jones #fpxreader #fp x reader #fp jones imagine #fp jones fanfic #fpjonesxreader #fpjonesxreaderimagine #fpjonesxreaderfanfic #fpjonesxreaderminiseries #fp jones x reader imagine

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blackcoffeeandblankpagess · 7 years ago

Photo

NYC Marathon 2017 Recap

Woke up at 4:45 and walked over to penn station to take the subway to the staten island ferry, the walk was a lil sketch but once I got to the platform there were a few marathoners and we all traveled together, one dude on the subway looked at me and was like “you look fast” I hope so buddy

While waiting for the (6:15) ferry I talked to a man from israel who had run 8 marathons in his home country, a few in europe, and this was his first in the states, so cool

The ferry ride goes right past the statue of liberty which is also cool

On the bus the man who sat next to me was AWESOME. This was his 28th time running nyc, 107th marathon, and he was 70 years old. Goals??? He was telling me about the races he has run all over the world and it makes me so excited to think that today was the first of a lifetime of marathoning

Got to the start village around 7:30, my wave wasn’t until 10:15 so plenty of time but it didn’t feel slow. I ate some oatmeal for breakfast and drank a shit ton of water and gave myself about 2.5 hours for the food to digest 1.5 hours for the water (these are the things that you learn to prioritize when your gi tract is out to kill you)

We could see the bridge from the starting village but couldn’t actually see the runners on it, still it was super cool to hear the cannon go off for the elites even if we couldnt see them ALSO can we talk about how fucking badass shalane is??? wish I could have watched the race but from what I’ve seen/heard it was phenomenal #tarheels

When the cannon went off they played frank sinatra’s new york, new york and it was magical

I was being very careful with my pacing on the bridge because i was warned by many people who have run nyc that it’s easy to go out too fast and ignore the hill and screw yourself over and my strategy was supposed to be running the first half at ~9 minute pace. The first mile was exactly 9 but then….

I went out way too fast, I was dropping sub 8s in the early miles and even though I kept repeating myself that the race doesn’t start until the second half and doesn’t really start until mile 20, I continued to betray my plan

I think the main issue was that I felt good, it wasn’t like I was killing myself to get my splits so I was just like …this is fine, also I’ve only raced half marathons before in which case pushing the pace is okay because by the time it really gets to me the race is over

Needless to say, I fucked myself over real bad!!! (we’ll get to that in a minute)

I saw the wonderful @mountains–and–miles at mile 5.5 and one of my best friend’s (who is currently abroad) family at mile 8.5 so I had a lot to look forward to in the first half, also the crowds in brooklyn are AMAZING

At mile 7 I just happened to pass fricken KATHRINE SWITZER!!!!! talk about strong women. I had no idea she was running and I was like HOLY SHIT!!!!!

Around mile 10.5 I started to realize my mistake of taking off too fast but the effects didn’t really hit until mile 16

Ironically I ran the first half in the exact time of my first half marathon (1:47) although my tracker prob said 1:49 or something because weaving in and out of people added distance

Miles 15-16ish are the queensboro bridge which I think could more accurately be named hell on earth. I was also wary of this area heading into the race after everything I had read. It’s really silent after leaving the crowds of brooklyn, a hill, and it was the part of the race where I really started to come apart

Miles 16-19 are first ave in manhattan which is wild but I was seriously breaking down at this point, threw my time goals out the window and decided to just focus on getting to the finish line, as the OG tumblr homies will appreciate my mantra was “it does not matter how slowly you go so long as you do not stop”

Basically miles 18-25 I did a run/walk pattern that I remembered someone I know using for an ultra and shockingly it didn’t cost me as much time as I expected

I saw my mom at mile 19 and again at mile 22 where she jumped in and ran with me for a few blocks which I desperately needed at that point

By some crazy turn of events at mile 24.5 I just happened to run into the other girl from the unc marathon club who was running the race…out of 51,000 runners, what are the odds???

According to my watch I ran 26.2 in 4:09, but my official time was 4:12. Because of a lot of weaving around in the beginning of the race I added about a quarter of a mile in distance

One of the toughest parts of nyc is actually the finish, once you cross the line you have either a half mile or mile walk to exit depending on if you checked a bag. During my walk towards the exit I ended up making a fun detour to the medical tent!!

My calves were hurting a LOT, not just the expected I just ran a marathon so obviously I’m sore hurting. I decided I would stop at the med tent since I still had probably about a mile total of walking left to meet my parents. On my way to the med tent I suddenly was having trouble breathing which is fucking terrifying. Every time I took a breath in my breathing was all shaky and I felt like I was gasping for air and couldn’t get any. Something which has never happened to me so that was bizarre.

The doctors were all wonderful and one of the guys joked that he couldn’t help me since I had on my UNC jersey and he was a duke alumn, fair

After a few mins my breathing was normal and my legs weren’t much better but I didn’t think sitting there was really gonna help so

I got a post race poncho and I was expecting it to be a shitty rain poncho but it was giant and fleece and fuzzy and I think I’ll probably build a home inside of it and live in it forever

When I finally reached my parents (who for the record are divorced so the fact that we were all together briefly made my heart happy) I burst into (happy) tears

Afterwards we went back to our friend’s apartment in manhattan and they had an ice bath and hot tea waiting for me, amen

Took a train home and got back around 8 to some leftover homemade pizza and kombucha for dinner, nice

Those are all of the little details I think. I would definitely summarize it as a learning experience. Went out way too fast but also expected that to happen since it was my first marathon. In training and in racing I have a lot I plan to do differently the next time around (spring!!). Overall though i have no regrets, it was an absolutely incredible experience and as bart yasso said, “the nyc marathon is the closest thing a regular person can get to an olympic experience” so many runners from all over the globe. The announcements in the starting village were in all different languages it was amazing.

Also thank you so much to everyone who messaged/commented/texted me wishing me luck and giving me advice, it seriously means the world to me

Edit: Something else worth noting, I never once felt nervous for this race only pure excitement and that is how I know this is a lifetime sport for me, love love love

#nycmarathon #runs #personalposts #racerecap

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straydays7-blog · 7 years ago

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My Day6inNYC Experience!

EDIT: I typed this up in word and pasted it into Tumblr. Tumblr kinda make some things look a little weird so excuse that please.

This is super late coming but as soon as I left NYC I had to cram for a ton of exams and now that most of those are over I can take the time to talk about my experience seeing Day6 perform live and even hi-touching them;;;; This post might be a little bit all over the place, but I cant help but to feel SO MANY FEELINGS when I think about this okay. Its still so surreal I cant believe it actually happened it felt like a really good dream okay. Also, I wish my English were better to express myself here I have so many emotions I wish to express but honestly, I dont know how Id even describe these feelings in any other languages I know SO ILL TRY MY BEST WITH ENGLISH. Also, fair warning, thisll probably be really long so prepare yourself.

Okay, first things first. I arrived like 30 mins early to pick up my P2 wristband and apparently had I been a little earlier I could have seen day6 enter the Town Hall! Somehow, even though I was not the first that arrived at the venue to pick up my wristband, I did end up being first in the P2 line. And lord behold. Someone opened the backstage door. Then and there, I caught a glimpse of Sungjin, playing his guitar singing his part in the You Were Beautiful chorus. EVERYONE AROUND ME STARTED SCREAMING LOL. I was in such shock. Sungjin is so beautiful (in present tense) and has one of the best voices Ive ever heard okay. I dont think I really realized until then I was going to see Day6, like the band that inspires me to work hard every day and makes me so happy. Even though I had bought the ticket and everything that brought me to NYC, it felt surreal and then I knew it was R E A L. Theyre real and I was about to watch them perform live and even meet them afterwards like what the heck? After getting my wristband, I picked up a fanproject banner that would later be used to move day6 to tears:) These boys are so wholesome.

I went back to my hotel for a while after that because it was rainy and windy so walking around didnt sound so nice. Around 5:30 I left to get a bite to eat and then head back to the venue. Ended up getting a burger at Five Guys (and okay totally off topic from seeing Day6, but the Five Guys burger I had in NYC was so much better than any Ive had here in VA? Or maybe excitement makes stuff taste better.) I arrived at the venue at like 6:00 and the line was already pretty long! There were some My Days handing out photocards and I bought a Sungjin badge from one girl. (This experience is gonna make me sound so Sungjin biased but omg my bias is definitely Young K)

Once I was in the Town Hall I decided to buy a lightstick to cheer for the band! Id already ordered some of the other merch from the Subkulture Shop, because I was literally only traveling with one backpack and didnt want to buy more than I could fit in to take back home.

I had no idea on which side my seat would be, I only knew I would be 12 rows away from the stage. So, when I found my seat I was beyond happy to see I was on Young K and Wonpils side of the stage omg. With a really clear view of the both of them also! All the MyDays there were so sweet man, I had a great time talking with some while waiting for the concert to begin. Though I do honestly really wish that @mikulinneamew or @reading-river would have been there with me. Day6s instruments were already set on the stage and oh my goodness I fell in love with Sungjins Gibson Les Paul. Its white body with the black pickguard and golden hardware is SO BEAUTIFUL. Makes me want to go out and buy a Les Paul just like it, but going to this concert I used money I was originally saving for a new Fender P-Bass (That aint happening for a while now lol) but I am so not complaining. Sungjins Martin acoustic is also really beautiful, but I still prefer Taylors. Young Ks bass is also super pretty. Really, I was drooling over these instruments while waiting for the concert to begin.

Its two minutes before the concert was set to begin and everyone is already chanting â€œDAY6! DAY6! DAY6! DAY6!â€. Shortly after the lights went dark and the screen behind the stage started to play a video introducing the members (And can I say I love how so many of their songs were mashed up perfectly in that video like wow Id love the audio of just that)! One by one then the members came on stage. First Dowoon, then Wonpil, followed by Young K, Jae and last but not least, leader Sungjin! While the video was finishing playing I could see Young K getting his bass tuned and ready to perform. I started tearing up here already because they were right in front of me? Unreal, but yet so real.

And then, the first song was: I WAIT! One of my favorite songs already ;; (what am I saying, all of their songs are my favorites) Such a high energy song for the first one. It was perfect to get the crowd hyped and pumped for what was to come! Then there was me crying of happiness and singing along though omg. DAY6 IS SO COOL PERFORMING. Sungjin and Jae rocking out on their guitars, Young K thumping on the Bass, Wonpil playing the Synth and Dowoon rocking the drums! I loved how connected the audience was with the band too like out of all the live performances from bands Ive seen, this one was definitely the one with the most chemistry with the audience and music! All of the â€œI WAIT!â€ chants were so nice to hear with the music aaaa. THE SONG ENDED SO FAST. All songs went by so quick really, but hey that just means youre having a great time.

The second song was: HUNT! I was NOT prepared for this song so early on in the show already. If I had to summarize this performance in two words: Younghyuns rap (I love it so much). I really love the guitar riffs in this song so I payed a lot of attention to Jae and Sungjin at first but man, as soon as it was rapping time my eyes were focused on Young K. His rapping timbre is soooOOO darn good. And hes such a good performer too when he does it. HE FEELS EVERY WORD HE SAYS. Hunt is such a good song. I loved it. So much.

After the first two songs, lights went back on for a moment and Jae hyped up the audience! Young K shook his head the first time everyone made noise at Jaes request, but the second time Jae asked us to make some noise BOY THAT WAS GOOD VOLUME MYDAYS HAVE GREAT LUNGS.

That was followed by: IM SERIOUS! This song is so fluffy and catchy Im pretty sure everyone was singing along in the â€œI cant stop loving youâ€ part. I mean, how could anyone stop loving day6 theyre so wholesome and talented and KIND AND SWEET. Wow. Its SO FUN to watch Sungjin play his acoustic guitar he was smiling the whole time. Everyone was smiling during that performance EVEN DOWOON HE WAS SO CUTE. Its such a sweet song how can you not smile playing it or listening to it. During the acapella part Young K was shooting finger hearts and did an AMAZING adlib. I was m e l t i n g. Turning me into a puddle.

The next song was: MAN IN A MOVIE! I REALLY LOVE THIS SONG A LOT. Another really soft and fluffy song, but soOOO musically interesting. Day6 is one of the few groups that not only produces earcandy, but earcandy that is also thinking candy for people who enjoy music theory (a n d I d o) This is the only day6 song Ive actually written out a fingerstyle ukulele arrangement for (totally weird instrument choice, but Im working on rewriting it for guitar LOL). Im EXTREMELY fond of everyones vocals on this song. Especially Sungjins and Young Ks :)

After this song it was game and Q&A time! I cant remember if the preference game or Q&A was first so Im just going to talk about the preference game first.

Firstly though, all the members introduced themselves. They all looked so happy that it made me even happier LOL. For the preference game, all of the audience had to stand up and participate in a game with day6! It was so fun! First up the audience had to guess which one Jae like more, by either raising their left or right arm: The statue of liberty or Brooklyn bridge. The right answer was Brooklyn bridge and the majority of the audience (including me) had guessed it right! The MyDays who guessed wrong, had to take their seat again. Second was Bob (Sungjin). I guessed his wrong already! >3< The question was if he preferred playing Overwatch or Fifa. The correct answer was Fifa. Sadly, most people had guessed this one wrong. Next was Dowoon. We had to guess if he prefers skirts or jeans on girls LOL. His answer was jeans but it got too loud that I couldnt quite hear his reasoning. Then was Young K. Does he prefer sneakers or high heels? His answer was sneakers, because high heels are very uncomfortable (he said hes even tried them on before what a cutie). Wonpil had the most far fetched question in my opinion it was kinda funny! The audience had to guess if he likes Ariel or Snow White more. His answer was Snow White because he feels more sorry for her. Lastly was a question that would decide the faith of a lot of Jae stans hair LOL. Does he like long hair or short hair better on girls? His answer was short hair, because it makes them seem more confident. After all of those guesses only four lucky MyDays out of about 1500 were left standing! They got invited onto the stage and got a bag full of (signed!) tour merch gifted to them by Day6! It was so sweet and kind that the winners even received such a gift from Day6 themselves!

MOVING ON TO THE Q&A! Before they picked their questions to answer, Sungjin said â€œThis! Is! Paradise!â€ and Dowoon sang the â€œOh you are My Daaayâ€ part of their song MY DAY to the NYC MyDays. Wonpil went first to pick his question. While each member would choose their question, the audience would sing the jeopardy theme song. It was hilarious. He chose the question: â€œWhere did your interest in music come from?â€ Right when he was about to answer the question someone in the audience screamed â€œI LOVE YOU YOUNG Kâ€ but Young K shut her down so fast saying â€œIts Wonpil time!â€ Wonpil was flustered for a sec but then resumed to answer his question and said that he listened to a lot of hip hop when he was young and that got him interested. Next up was Young K! He chose the question: â€œWhat was the funniest moment in your life?â€. He began to say that since Chuseok hes been eating more. And his most funny moment was before he came onto the stage. Apparently his pants didnt fit him anymore and he had to expand them a bit! The way he told this story was utterly hilarious and cute I can highly recommend finding a fancam of this moment omg. After him was Dowoon. His question was: â€œIf you could have a superpower what would it be?â€ He said he wishes he could talk to animals. When he was in college he had a pet cat which he neglected and now he feels bad for that. He said if he could only communicate with one kind of animal though it would be bear LOL. Sungjin started imitating a bear after that and it was so hilarious omg he puffed himself up and was clawing at him. Next was Sungjin! He was lowkey dancing along to the jeopardy theme omg. His question was: â€œWhat is the hardest thing you have ever done?â€. He said working towards Day6s debut was the hardest time in his life ;; He shouted out collapsedone who helped them a lot towards their debut and he was actually at the concert right there ;; Jae was the last one to get a question. He chose: â€œWhat inspired you to pursue music?â€. He said he was getting into a bunch of Youtube musicians and thought he should try it out too. He met Wong Fu Productions Phil who also further inspired him to pursue music. And so Yellowpostitman was born. That concluded the Q&A! Day6 left the stage for a quick moment while the NYC Vlog-like video they made for the tour started playing. This time it was Wonpils cut! It showed the boys having fun at times square (someone in the audience screamed I SEE MYSELF and everyone laughed it was so funny) and Wonpil loosing his phone while dancing on the street LOL. I really love this vlog concept they had to play during intermission its so sweet of them.

Once the vlog was over they came back on stage and started to perform You Were Beautiful. THIS SONG IS SO BEAUTIFUL. Its one of the first songs of theirs I heard that got me into them ;; I was tearing up during this whole performance its such a heartfelt song and you could truly feel the emotions of the song being conveyed in their performance. They all sing it so softly yet powerfully. I really love Young Ks vocal parts in this song and his voice was so stable too (everyones was really) aaa ;;

The next song they performed was their debut song CONGRATULATIONS! Everyone in the audience had received a red sticker to cover their phone flashlight with during this song to create a red ocean. I wasnt in a good seat so see if it was a success or not but the lighting definitely seemed more red :) Everyone was singing along to EVERY BIT of this song it was fantastic. I love this song so much aaa. Young Ks rap makes me feel so many FEELINGS. This song was over way too quick I wish itd last forever.

After Congratulations Jae was saying that the last two songs are coming now and everyone was getting a LIL SAD that the night was coming to an end soon. (Jae didnt count the encore though ;D) Jae also took a moment to tell everyone that they should follow their dreams and not let anyone tell them that they cant make it. Even when it seems impossible to make it to your dreams he believes that we can make the jump and achieve them ;; Hearing those words from him made me a sobbing mess. For a few reasons I think. Even just seeing them perform live was a dream come true. Being in NYC (if even just for two days) was a dream come true. Its a city Id been dreaming of seeing someday since I was a little kid. Probably because music as a career has almost always been my dream. And NYC is one of the worlds music capitals. I used to want to become a concert pianist. Then I wanted to become a music teacher. Right now Im leaning more towards songwriting, production and playing guitar LOL. But as someone whos in the position where I need to decide what I want to do with my future relatively soon, Jaes words helped me so much.

Their next song was LETTING GO! And oh my goodness. I was not prepared for those buttery sweet harmonies in the beginning. I was thinking so much about what Jae had said before during this performance so Im a little blank on what special happened during this performance but I totally remember it being mesmerizing;;

Their last song before encore was I SMILE! The fanchants on this one were so strong! Everyone held their banner up which read â€œMy Day6 which I thought I only met in my dreams is right in front of meâ€. I could see Young K tear up when he read it. It was so sweet :) I do wish that Wonpils synth had been a tiny bit louder because he has that cool solo part in it, but I could hardly hear it. But the whole performance was so overwhelmingly beautiful that I was crying.

After performing I SMILE they left the stage and everyone started chanting â€œDAY6! DAY6!â€ again. Shortly after they came back on stage and THEY PERFORMED DANCE DANCE. This song is so upbeat and happy and makes you forget all the stress so much I love it to bits. I absolutely love Jaes guitar part in this song too so I tried to focus on him until Brians rap distracted me AGAIN (rapper K is my weakness okay). The entire performance was so high energy it was perfect buildup to the next song they performed which was also their last performance for the night. FREEí•˜ê²Œ! This is my go-to song for escaping from the stress of life and simply basking in how powerful music truly is. So, hearing it live, as the encore really touched me (and I cried more). I felt so many emotions go through me during this performance. It felt like a reminder of why I love music so much, which sometimes is well needed. Its so energetic and uplifting. My highlight of this performance: â€¦Young Ks rap (wow surprise surprise). Also Sungjins high note! And Jae jumping into the crowd and hyping us up even more! (If Jae tells you to jump, you have to jump.) This performance was a perfect end for the concert. I really didnt want it to end though.

After this performance Day6 bowed and thanked the audience. I dont know where to begin describing how I felt after that. I still had the high touch left but the main event was over. I felt (still feel and always will) so extremely blessed to have been able to experience that. Theyre such a wholesome, hardworking and admirable band. I felt such extreme happiness.

The night was nearly over, but the hi-touch was still left for those who had purchased a P2 ticket! Id never done a hi-touch before, so I didnt know what to expect. I only knew itd go by super quick. What I did NOT expect however, is to walk around a corner and BAM there standing is Young K, Mr. Brian Kang, THE KANG YOUNGHYUN, BASSIST RAPPER GODLY VOCALS FULL TIME COLLEGE STUDENT BUT ALSO FULL TIME BANDMEMBER HE WORKS SO HARD OK. It is a lot to take in when you see your ultimate bias being the first in line for the hi-touch. My first thought was how pretty his NOSE is. Like dang, boys got the finest nose Ive ever seen. My second thought was how intimidating he seemed though omg. But as soon as it was my turn for a brief second with him it seemed like he was glowing and flowers were blooming around him? Hes got the sweetest smile and eyes. Instead of high fiving him I held onto his hand for a second and all I could say was â€œI love you so muchâ€ I WAS IN SUCH AWE. He gave my hand a bit of a squeeze and said he loves me back. SUCH A NICE MAN IM CRYING.Â Then it was already time to move on though and next was Dowoon! My mind was completely blank from Young K being first (I was hoping hed be last for this reason LOL) I also grabbed onto Dowoons hand for a moment and I mustve not said anything at first, because he was like â€œThank you!â€ first (his Korean accent is adorable) so I said thank you back to him and he then gave a teeny bow like how polite omg. Thats all I had with Dowoon though (Wish I could have said more I wanted to tell him how cool he is!) But next was Jae. First impression: Hes so TALL. Second impression: Hes so NICE. I think Jae made it a thing to keep eye contact with his fans for as much as he could. I told him â€œThank you so much Jaeâ€ because man especially his speech about following dreams hit me hard as I had mentioned before. Hes honestly the member I was most thankful for that night (Im thankful for them all though please dont misunderstand!) I would have hugged him if I could. His face is so pretty up close too, how can someone manage to look handsome but like a personification of Chicken Little at the same time? Jae can. Next was Wonpil! And I must say I was taken a back a little like â€œWho is this man?â€ HE LOOKS SO DIFFERENT IN REAL LIFE. In a good way of course! I held onto his hand for a moment and said â€œThanks Wonpilâ€ he nodded and had such a smug look on his face like omg. SUNGJIN WAS NEXT AND BOY THIS WAS MY FAVORITE ENCOUNTER. He was already like pulling his arm back to give a really hard high five so I was BRACING myself, because it looked like it might be painful omg. Hes the only member I actually high fived whoops. BUT his high five was so happy and so energetic! Yet it was aggressively soft? It was definitely a hard high five but it didnt hurt at all LOL. He was like â€œAh yeah!â€ after that and I thanked him for the great show. Then the hi-touch was over for me. Even though I wish I could have had a little more time with them, I was so thankful to have had the experience in the first place.

IN CONCLUSION: This was the best night of my life so far. This definitely is not going to be the last time I see them live. If they come back to NA while Im still here you can count on me doing my best to get that P1 or P2 ticket. They better come to Europe someday too! For their next tour if it works out I might even try to go to more than one of their concerts. I was trying to go to the Toronto concert for this tour too, but my exam schedule wouldnt allow that. But I am so blessed that NYC happened. I will also definitely plan any trip to Asia around their concert schedule!

Tl;dr: I love day6 so much. See them live someday plz. Tell Brian I love him plz.

#day6innyc #day6 #day6inna2017 #zan rambles

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stateofgrace-acoustic · 7 years ago

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Taylor and Me

with reputation out and me loving it so much, i keep getting really nostalgic and astonished by how long i’ve been a fan of taylor’s and al the things she has accompanied me through. so i felt like posting a little reflection thing, feel free to ignore totally :D

like a lot of people Love Story was the first song of hers I heard. i was on the bus home with one of my friends and she let me listen to it. i was so young back then, oh my god. (like 12?) i think i found it catchy, but didn’t think much about it afterwards until two people had a presentation on taylor in music class. (we were all supposed to introduce our favorite artists). they played some more songs from fearless, and i can’t recall exactly what my reaction was but i know i wanted the album. i asked the presentation people if i could borrow it, and i remember looking through the booklet thinking how beautiful it was. i think even back then when i was so young i sort of intuitively understood what an amazing songwriter taylor was and how much work and effort she puts into everything she does.

fearless was for me very much an escapism record. i listened to it to enter this realm of magic and fairytales and dancing in the rain that was so far away from my everyday life and issues. i could never really apply her love songs to my life in a direct way, but i still felt like they were relatable for me, in a more abstract way - the feeling that came with them, a sort of freedom and passion, was how i felt in my happiest moments, when i didn’t feel inhibited by fear and doubt as i often did. and her nostalgic and sad moments i could relate to my own nostalgia as well.

my mom bought me the fanbook for christmas, and that’s when i started being interested in taylor as a person as well., and how she sort of became my role model. i read about her childhood and the way she tried to achieve her dream so hard until she succeeeded. about how she wasn’t afraid to put herself out there, to open herself up completely in her songs. i admired how she put kindness above all else, how in touch she was with her fans, but also how intelligent she was and how all of her decisions in her career were her own, how she didn’t let anyone else take control over what her life or ‘image’ to the public should be. all of those things and values i took to heart and tried to live them in my own life as much as possible. looking back now i couldn’t be happier with my choice of a role model. taylor helped guide me through some years that were difficult, as they are for pretty much every teenager i guess. ‘fearless is living in spite of the things that scare you to death’ was the motto i needed so much in my life, because i was very much defined and trapped by my fears in my teenage years - of social interaction, of taking risks, of failure.. taylor’s music was something i could always turn back to to give me strength.

i remember when speak now was announced, i was excited out of my mind. i wrote the tracklist down onto my computer and kept looking at it. i loved all the released singles so much and listened to them for days on end. i painted 13s onto my hands and danced around the living room. that is one of the main things that comes to my mind when i think of happy teenage memories: this image of me dancing to a taylor swift song.

speak now was an album that completely blew me away. i loved every single track from the first listen. it is still so incredible to me how she wrote that album completely by herself at 19; how talented she is with lyrics and melodies that completely fit together. i had some fan account back then on twitter and didnt shut up about taylor ever.

around that time, my parents and i were planning this huge vacation in Calfornia that would turn out to be one of my best - perhaps THE best experience of my teenage years, and we figured out that a the time we wanted to go, the Speak Now tour was in LA. my parents agreed to get tickets because they knew how much it meant to me, and also because they were lowkey fans themselves:D you can’t imagine how happy i was. it was my first concert ever, and the fact that i got to experience it in that huuuge location with so so many other people, it was like a dream. i was pretty far away from the stage at the side, but it was perfect for me - i think the huge crowd would have overwhelmed me. i was completely enthralled by the huge setup, the stage aesthetics, the costume changes, just how big and well planned it all was. i ended up thinking all concerts were like this, but i remember my dad saying that artists usually don’t talk that much during concerts. but taylor told the stories behind her songs, universal experiences that people could relate to, inspirational messages she wanted to get out to her fans. she really cared so much about connecting with all of us. when she was in the love story cage thing flying around the arena she even waved in the direction of our seating area even though we were so far up!

my favorite song from speak now was always long live, and i had desperately wanted her to play the song for the entire night. i loved all the rest, obviously, but i was telling myself not to be disappointed if it would be cut out. but then, almost at the end, she did play it! you can imagine small!me standing there almost crying quietly singing along in a state of absolute happiness. the memory makes me tear up right now ahhh, it was such an amazing moment.

then came up the red era, and i remember staying up til super late to watch the announcement of the new album. the thing is...to make it short, red simply came too early for me. i was not ready, and not being able to fully comprehend and appreciate, the emotional maturity and sheer genius of the red album. i did not really like wanegbt at first. when red came out i did listen to it a lot and like it, but like i said, i could not fully appreciate it. hearing the general fandom discussions i feel like a lot of people had a similar experience, because red was such a leap from speak now in terms of the tone of the writing. im also gonna be honest here, i was influenced by the negative portrayal of taylor in the media that kinda reached its first peak back then, and even though i didnt buy into what they said about her because i knew better, it still influenced me like subconsciously, you know? i was also a bit sceptical at her direction towards pop music. so overall, i became a bit distanced from taylor. i felt like i needed to ‘outgrow’ her. a lot of it also had to do with the fact that it was my Edgy Phase where i thought being normal was a bad thing and i wanted to be as Special and Grownup as possible. (i think everyone has that cringeworthy phase sometime in their life but i hate remembering it:D).

but the thing is, i think i needed that kind of alienation to eventually realize that taylor had grown up just like i had, but that didn’t mean we had to grow apart. by the time 1989 was announced i had actually done a great leap in maturity and had outgrown this thing where you idealize celebrities, and was able to see taylor as a person, with flaws and insecurities like everyone else, and that this didnt diminish her incredible talent of what a kind and wonderful person she is.

i was not the biggest fan of 1989 itself (multiple reasons; i still liked it though, just didnt love it), but paradoxically, I felt closer to taylor again during the new era than during red. i kinda missed the red era now and regretted that i wasnt more involved when it was there (i still do). but i loved taylor’s new attitude, i was glad she had found happiness in independence and relying on herself. i loved the cat videos and the polaroids and the voice memos that gave insight into the creation of the songs. also, blank space was my jam and still is. since that ive been a huge fan of this super smart move of hers of taking all the things people throw at her and embodying it ironically. iconic!!

so since i was a bit more involved again (though clearly not as much as in my early swiftie days) i wanted to see the 1989 tour, and did! throughout the show i realized how much had changed, but also everything - the important things - that stayed the same (her interactions with the fans, the speeches, etc.) and i had tons of fun. it was like a giant party with strangers - which is obviously a very different feel to speak now, but loved it :D

i was worried that taylor would go into hiatus after 1989 because she always talked about how it was her best work yet, and it broke so many records and won so many awards, that i thought she might be scared she couldnt top it, and taylor always wants to top herself. i ended up being right, though the hiatus was more about all the drama and accusations because people just cant stop being awful. they cant take the idea of a smart talented woman who also shows vulnerability.

but ive been awaiting a new album all this time, because generally i thought taylor doing pop had so much potential, i just wasnt completely a fan of the general direction of 1989. however....i never would have imagined loving the album as much as i do. i wrote a separate review about it, but basically - i totally love how reputation is big and confident but also super up close, intimate and deep at the same time. it’s darker, but it’s a powerful and sensitive sort of dark at the same time, if that makes sense. i can totally vibe to the general mood of the album because i think i can relate it to how i feel about my life right now a lot. also loving how taylor has truly found a place of happiness and trust after having been let down by ...the world?...so harshly. i love the aesthetic of the magazines and the poems, just everything about this era.

so basically, this album has completely pulled me back again to stanning taylor, and i think it’s kinda beautiful how i’ve come ‘full circle’ and am now back to hyping her music again as i used to :) i connect some of my most life defining and most precious memories with taylor, and i am glad i somehow found back to her and her music as i start off my twenties.

im looking forward to getting involved in the fandom again so much, and i can’t wait to see what the next year has in store for us all :’)

#that definitely wasnt everything bc i have so much to say but #...hey #taylor swift #me #this is a huge ass post im sorry #storytime

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richigneven · 7 years ago

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Buenos Aires Calling!

The signs could not have been much better: My first ‘vacation’ lasting more than a week since the awesome festival so called “gneven im grünen”, three concert tickets for my more or less favorite band ‘die toten hosen’- a band I have followed along down the road, which not only makes good music but also supports smaller bands, ethical correct NGO´s and sometimes even play in your living room if you are lucky AND the promising city of Buenos Aires, which goes as the Berlin of South America, or not even Latino American anymore. So my expectations were quite high as well, still they s were exceeded...

My hostel was great, although I arrived way too early they welcomed me with breakfast and showers. As I did not take the first internet recommendation I ended up in a 100% spanish-speaking community, from which a few studied and others sadly escaping war in Venezuela and some others doing whatever. Crazy those two things, first I could never do my exchange semester out of a dormitory, as I already troubled falling a sleep when not completely wasted- how do people snore louder than a airplane taking off? Second why have we reached the point that people need to escape their homes again and shouldnt we welcome them a little more than given them a bed in return of work? You find Venezuelans everywhere in South America right now...

Anyway, I wanted to get to know this European city, which at first glance showed off with nice facades, broken sidewalks and a walkable traffic situation (remember Im used to Lima at the moment, I actually got quite a cultural shock when people actually followed traffic rules and not everyone looked quite similar). I did a walking tour, and right away I saw it at its best, stunning buildings and cemeteries everywhere(at least in the right suburb..) Btw the popularity of their steaks is based on the flatness of the countryside of Argentina, cows actually do have some space to walk around and not need to be cooped up in some stall. Afterwards, I stumbled around myself, and by this is into a huge demonstration. All kinds of human protested in favor of rights for everybody, especially Woman and the LGBT scene. Every of the last ten years more than 200 women has be mudered by their husband or partners, I have heard about it before, but seeing the demonstration showed me how serious the issue is and how many must have suffered domestic violence. I followed along and was quite impressed by the creativity and number of participants. It seems like still the authorities dont really care, as this has been run for over a year now...

it really was endless...

I bet a better photografer would have made a good pic out of that!

Rushed from the energy of the protests I had a buncher Spätibeer (cerveza de ciosco) and decided to go see my friend from my old exchange semester in good old fresno..So we met 9 years ago and havent seen since. Ines were just working in a restaurant and I already had a few beers too many. So after she invited me for two more I tried too call it a night, which is always hard when you in a foreign city for the first time 10km away from your bed and trying to go by public transport. AllI know, I woke up in my hostel the next day and some blurry memories sitting in some other bar with some Germans, but I dont know why. Alright lets face it, probably the craving for more beer.

In the morning, I realized today would be the day I have never really imagined to become true. Seeing “Los Hosen” in Buenos Aires is said to be special. I always wanted to know what´s about it, because special is also sitting one hour in the” Berlin Ringbahn” and drink beer or the Chinese Wall, but neither gets a lot of my attention. After another day of enjoying various parts of the city I went in front of the venue, Museum, a buncher years ago crashed the stage in the second song and the concert was over. The first guys I approached were already a win in the lottery and I could not have asked for more. Spätibeer here and there and talks about everything what my Spanish has to offer. The show was crazy, a venue like SO36, long and narrow. A small terrace all around from which Campino (singer) jumped into the crowd and somehow mad his way back, totally red, as people did not want to let him go...A few punch were needed so he reached the stage again.

The crowd of 800-1000, of which maybe 100 were German, freaked out at pretty much every single song. Decent singing along but even harder dancing along. Everybody full of energy, led by a Band which noticeably enjoyed to be part of it once again. After the concert I went further to a few more Bars or you could call it Club even, energy for those after concerts partys I usually do not have after concerts in Germany. This night, I got a ride home, across the entire city, letting somebody out at the bus station apparently is no option when you their “guest”.

Party people

The same reason, the next day, I was invited to a match of one of the biggest football teams over there.. Boca Juniors, it was really interesting to see such a steep stadium which shacks because everybody jumps and how fascinated all the players and fans are. But I certainly have friends which can analyze those events way more. Side note: Argentina has stopped to allow fans of the visiting teams for all league games, in order to prevent violence. A working approach, but defiantly not in the sense of the sport.

A couple more or less boring hard working days for my uni were interrupted by a Cover concert and even more interesting of a Concert of the Magic Mystery tour show in a house in Buenos Aires. You can apply ahead and if you lucky the Hosen come to give a show and the fans possibly destroy all you have. I talked to many people who at least once tried it, but these gigs are quite precious. Getting inside this house was not possible, but through same delays in my taxi I arrived for the last few songs of the concert, which was totally sufficient for me. Except the drummer, everybody got outside of the house once and of course Campino climbed every fence there exist on the premises. Afterwards, a little party in front of the fence took place and once again a intercultural understanding with hands and legs. Knowing a few words of Spanish certainly made the situation even more fun and allowed me buying beer in the cioscos around, which was hard as for some reasons they only wanted to sell cold beer, but to understand this I almost failed.

Campino not only gave its best during the show, the aftershowparty he won against everybody!

In front of the fence, it was still cleanable afterwards, nobody know about inside

Wow Wednesday already, but still two more official shows to go! The German Hosen fans, organized a bus tour to the town of the next venue, La Plata, which is 1-2 hours down south from BA. Ive almost missed the bus, due to lets face it: Hangoverness but also Credit Card issues, during which I kind of realized how screwed you could be in a foreign country. But all worked out and with 1 hour delay and a busdriver who ask after 1 hour ride where he actually supposed to head we were almost at our first stop: The barbeque party in some Argentina´s house. The owner just decided to through a party for everybody who wanted to come and as it was somebody´s birthday the owner bought beer and steaks for the most of them. (unluckily no grilled cheese, but this time people were at least to buy warm beer in the Späti next door) So i tackled my hangover from last night with a few beers and it become a really nice get-together with people from all parts of society, ages and regions of Germany and Argentina. The good bye was a kiss for the woman living there for everybody and the last existing steaks as “Schnittchen” for later. When was the last time you invited 70 unknown people to your backyard and when it comes to cleaning up they all get in a bus and you give them food and beer for the road? Arriving in front of the venue the people once again couldnt even wait to party on and sang along the sound check inside which was with the song “Reisefieber”, so an old and popular one, this was promising. I dedicated myself to socialize and to the Späti´s around so once inside It starts to be more of a blur...I remember a few songs, some crowdsurfing, an amazing venue as very wide, once again energized Hosen, more beer(in cans btw) and a few special acts. Is there anything more to ask for? Claro, afterparty, but this is even more of a blur...With many more beer and whatsoever for everybody who was tired or just wanted to be sure to make it a good night we drove through la plata and some other parties over there...At some point i recall 7 people, from which I knew 1 slightly before but good times. At some point at 6 or 7 we returned to BA, I was already sleeping in the car for a while. But the others were still going strong not being tired at the moment. Such a day, no shower, one more sip of beer and straight to bed. I reckon I will never get closer to Punk rock than this before.

Days with the most drinks, usually the ones with the fewest pictures for me ;)

Next day started slowly, ended slowly but again a Coverband concert, Peru tied Argentina, so know it´s very interesting who is going to qualify and another day I made a nice tour through the party area of Palermo with two new friends. The show on Saturday was in a huge venue of 5000-7000 people. The living room of the Ramones, they said. Many other guest, setlist switched again and At least the first third of the concert everybody went crazy once more. With forgoing time, people got more relaxed and only half of the stadium jumped along..I mobilized my last strength and had an amazing time. Meeting people in the crowed I have met during the last week and giving them a possible last high five or smile.

Los hosen more or less announced the location of the aftershow party: the club we went the week before but I called it a night in some bar close to my hostel. A friend gave me his sweater to show once more how welcome I am here. Lots of promises of reuniting in whatever part of the world were mad and at some point I went home to my Hostel. I´m not sure if or when I will see this city and especially all those nice people again. But the times, friendlyness and in all kinds of situation and circumstances they gave me here will always be reminded in my brain and my heart. I now understand when los Hosen say they do not come for the music, they come to meet the people, I seldom received such a warm welcome of different people in various situations in several forms. As always I hope to be able to return the favor in a place where I can show people around and gave them a good time, but for now I can just say thank you!

rocknroll

last beer, this time for sure!

more impressions:

there he is!

street art

subway art

maybe next time Ill tell you about my first Spanish interview! ;)

#hastaluego #hastalamuerte #buenosaires #dietotenhosen #cerveza

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coterminalangle · 8 years ago

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THE WINGS TOUR ANAHEIM DAY 2 RECAP

-FIRST, I GOT PLENTY OF PHOTOS AND I FILMED ALMOST EVERY SONG (not the whole song for some of them) SO IF YOU WANT ANY PHOTOS JUST MESSAGE ME!!

-so i was pretty close up: section 225 row E

-pre-concert, they played all their MV’s and no one was really hyped for like 2013-2015 MV’S BUT THE MOMENT YOUNG FOREVER CAME ON EVERYONE WAS SCREAMING OK EVERYONE WAS HYPED LIKE BRUH

-they started with not today and let me tell you, the moment they appeared on stage, they looked unreal. literally. they looked like perfectly sculpted wax figures istg

-i couldn’t believe i was actually there; i still can’t.

-they did silver spoon next and the beat was kinda different but it made it more lit so i wasn’t complaining and boi those hip thrusts i dropped my phone

-everything went downhill after that- not downhill like failure of the show, but failure of my heart and mind to process my emotions

-all the songs im gonna recap are gonna be out of order from this point down

-so they performed dope and of course jimin ended with that cute ass heart thing

-lost hit me like a truck

-they did this mashup of old songs- n.o, danger, boy in luv, no more dream??, there were others but i honestly can’t even remember i was too hype

-ok

-cypher 4

-c y p h e r 4

-i am willing to kill to watch that performed live again

-i don't usually say these things but THEY LITERALLY WORE THOSE RICH ASS SUGAR DADDY COATS OK HOSEOK WORE THOSE FUCKING SUNGLASSES AND NAMJOON IS SO FUCKING TALL AND YOONGI JUST FUCKING SLAYED MY EXISTENCE OK

-speaking of daddy, this bitch sitting near me wouldn’t stop screaming daddy throughout the entire concert and i nearly smacked her

-but yes, cypher 4 made my existence whole again

-SOLO SONGS

-jeongguk that talented ass fucker who can do anything and do it perfectly i can’t with that boy he performed begin so well thaT DANCE BREAK THOUGHT OMF so much talent i-

-jimin was a whole king. a whole king. when they lifted him up in the last chorus in Lie, i almost chocked and died

-yoongi. yoooooonnggiiiiiiiii. ok so first love. they played this vvv emotional video before he performed and it fucking crushed me and then yoongi comes out and slays the entire human race .here was an orchestra and i was so weak ok

-reflection. ok so you see, kim namjoon is my whole heart and seeing him in person was actually so surreal and absolutely unbelievable. sure, call him my bias but he means a lot more to me than a label. anyways, this boi, so fucking tall. he looks so much taller in person. like i have friends that are 5′11 but kim namjoon i dont know why he looked so damn tall maybe because he’s a glowing bean but still i dont understand why he had to look so damn perfect i screamed i love you kim namjoon at the top of my lungs about 67 times. OK AND BACK TO RELFECTION ok you know the whole “i wish i could love myself” part?? well after we started chanting “we love you” he started changing up his lines and i dont know why but they hit me so damn hard just him singing in english and being able to speak from his heart while he improvd in front of 20,000 people was heart breaking and heart warming at the same time

-stIGMA ok taehyung and namjoon swithced places so basically at the end of reflection, namjoon runs inside the telephone box and then taehyung comes out of it. here’s all i remember from stigma: kim taehyung hit those high notes yes he fucking did

-MAMA MAMA MAMA OHMYFUCKING GOSH ok hoseok is pure gold, he couldn’t stop smiling, ohmygod. everyone was hyping him up and he couldn’t stop smiling he’s so ethreal god bless. basically he sat in this chair with the backup dancers around him and he sings mama and all that. and you know that pause before he goes “hello mama” OK LOOK HE STARTED WALKING BACK TO THE STAGE AND HE PUTS HIS MIC ON A STAND AND STARTED SINGING/RAPPING ACOUSTIC OHMGOD BEST MOMENT OF MY LIFE HIS “HELLO MAMA” FUCKING KILLED ME OK YES IM A 94 LINE ENTHUSIAST COME@ ME also during mama thre were videos of fetus hoseok playing on the screen and i sobbed my little boi i lava him so much

-AWAKE WAS MY SHIT I SWEAR OK JIN HIT ALL THE FUCKING NOTES GOD FUCKING BLESS HE’S A KING AND THEN DURING THE PAUSES IN BETWEEN LYRICS HE WOULD JUST LOOK AT THE CROWD AND HE LOOKED LIKE HE WAS GONNA CRY EVERYTIME HE WAS SO SINCERE AND SO THANKFUL AND GRATEFUL I CAN’T THANK THE LORD ENOUGH FOR KIM SEOKJIN

-okok so they performed save me and i shit myself

-they performed run and i was like MY SHIT dude they kept throwing water or whatever that action is called but boy was it a beautiful sight they were so happy i’m so happy

-well fire. um. threw me under a bus and crushed every organ in my body HOW THE FUCK DO YOU EVEN PERFORM THAT SONG SO WELL AFTER PERFORMING LIKE 15 SONGS BEFORE IT BITCH THEY WERE SO IN SYNC I CAN’T BELIEVE

-21st century girl was so cute they were so free and so themselves ive lived

-i need u. wow tears fell from my eyes

-favorite part of every song was when they would just stop singing/rapping and the entire audience just chanted the lyrics tey looked so happy i can’t

-whEN YOONGI AND HOSEOK TOOK OUT THEIR EARPIECES YOU KNOW YOU DID WELL

-OH AM I WRONG WAS SO LIT OK

-they played this really emotional video and it basically was saying how its 7 boys but 1 heart & 7 hearts but 1 boy and i honestly didn’t think it could hit me that hard it was just explainin their journey and how they’ll always walk togther i swear to god i’m whipped sadly i didnt get a video of this video but ohmygod

-everyone served fuckin looks wowow blessed

-seokjin told us that he felt born again and i lost it AND THEN HE GOES “ARMY YOU ARE MY HEART” AND HE HAD A FUCKING PAPER HEART TAPED TO HIS HEART I CANT WITH HIM OHMYFUCKING

-THEN TAEHYUNG TAKES IT AND STARTS MAKING CUTE FACES WITH IT

-ok someone threw some flower plushy i believe on the stage and seokjin picked it up and pretending like he was pikachuing with it god i cant him

-kim namjoon started thanking his mom for everything hes done and accomplished and ohmyogod i screamed “thats my baby” so many fucking times at all 7 of them im so whipped

-he started talking about the rainbow and then got all philosophical and i couldnt stop crying hes all “after rain theres always sunshine and thats where rainbows come from” aand im pretty sure he connected us to being his rainbow somehow ohmygod im melting

-did i mention kim namjoon is so fucking tall hes so ethreal i cant even begin to describe how much i love him ok all of them look so fucking good in person they look like gods tbh ohmygod KIM NAMJOON IS SO FUCKING TALL CAN I HAVE HIS HEIGHT IM ONLY 5′6 GODDAMN

-seokjin’s intense waving at the end made my life

-JIMIN FUCKING JUMPED LIKE 6 TIMES OK HE WAS JUMPING FOR JOY AS IF HE WERE JUMPING FOR A JUMPING PHOTO GODDAMN I OVE THAT BOY SO MUCH I CANT CONTROL MY EMOTIONS HES SO PRECIOUS

-HOSEOKS SMILE IS ALL I EVER NEEDED TO LIVE

-also your ears are literally plugged in there from the amount of screaming and hype so all of them sound perfect and have the voice of gods then once your ears are okk you can actually hear reality

-spring day got me so emotional jimin’s dancing man

-2!3! i cant begin to explain

-ok BOY MEETS EVIL HOSEOK IS A MOTHERFUCKING GOD I NEED AIR OK HE SLAYED THAT SO FUCKING HARD OK THANKS

-blood sweat and tears man. blood sweat and fucking tears: a song title that sumed up my entire concert experience. ok but it was so good ok, they were all so into it. DURING YOONGI’S FIRST RAP VERSE HE HELD OUT HIS MIC AN EVERYONE CHANTED HIS ENTIRE RAP OHMYGOD BEST MOMENT HE LOOKED SO SATISFIED I LOVE MIN YOONGI

-oh yes during that really emotional video they played you never walk alone and i lost it

-i probably forgot a shit ton of stuff but i hope this gave you insight on how to die and live at once

-one of the best nights of my life-i cannot begin to thank bangtan for their wonderful performance and ability to hype up 20,000 people and get them all to scream “i love myself” and to get a crowd to scream lyrics in a language they don’t understand or speak

-all 7 of them asked if we will walk with them forever, so here’s my answer amongst the 20,00 people screaming, crying, and hype: bangtan, i will never fail to support you and i will never fail to stop loving you. thank you for proving that dreams come true, even if those dreams seem like a reality because we’re numb to believing the nearly impossible. thank you for letting me stick by you and thank you for bringing the freshest sense of life and love and reality. so yes, i will walk with you, out of pure love and inspiration.

#btswings #btswingstour #btsanaheim #btswingstouranaheim #wingstour #wings2k17 #anaheimday2 #bts #bangtan #bangtansonyeondan #bangtanboys #the wings tour #bts wings #bts anaheim #bts wings tour #bts wings tour anaheim

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apsbicepstraining · 7 years ago

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‘Welcome home’: the Nevada hostel where it’s ever Burning Man

The festival may be over for another year, but theres an age-old flophouse in Reno which allows you simulate youre on the playa … forever

Playa dust?

A woman was regarding a flask of dust from the Black Rock Desert where Burning Man was taking place at that moment, and had offered to scatter a pinch of it on my thought. My hair was still damp from my first proper shower in a week and I was sure that some of that insidious dust was still clinging under my toenails and in the crimps of my ears. I waned, but “the mens” next to me bent his head reverently to receive the unusual sacrament.

We were in the courtyard of the Morris Burner Hostel in Reno, Nevada, watching a live feed of a wooden guy incandescing 120 miles back. The Morris is a Burning Man-inspired facility, and on the most difficult night of the 2015 carnival it was propping a parallel gala. A DJ played while two effigies kindled: a 60 -foot one on the screen and a six-foot one in the courtyard. Half the crowd was in garb. In figurehead of the stage someone was schooling beings how to hula hoop; in a tent nearby people were taking turns pole dancing. I had left the playa, Burning Mans festival fields, six hours earlier but it felt like I hadnt led very far.

The exterior of the hostel in Reno. Photo: VJC/ Vincent Cascio

The Morris has no agent link to the Burning Man festival or organisation. But its owned and run by self-identifying burners and operates according to Burning Mans 10 principles. Its the brainchild of former tech executive Jim Gibson, who is well-known on the playa as Jungle Jim. When Gibson bought the ignored motel building in 2013, he had no thought how well the burner population would respond to his vision of build parish, promoting the arts, and civilizing beings in the Burning Man ethos. Parties rallied around the project. Two hundred voluntaries were involved in the multi-year renovation of what had formerly been a flophouse.

When we first get here the building was utterly dilapidated. There were holes in such structures and a quarter-inch of nicotine on every surface, says customer service manager Andy DelliColli, who goes by his playa name, Ice. Now the felony proportion in the neighborhood is around 30% lower, and nearly all the empty structures around us have been purchased by firms which we helped tribunal. The neighborhood is suffering quite a renaissance because of us being here.

All aboard the Jungle bus. Image: VJC/ Vincent Cascio

The improvement isnt strictly by osmosis. Communal endeavour and civic responsibility are among Burning Mans 10 principles. In that spirit, the Morris runs a weekly clothing and blanket drive over the winter. And after Burning Man, festival-goers can deposit plethora food and apparel there to be donated to benevolence. The hostel itself ranges on volunteerism. Most of the staff are payable residents who live on the premises, as DelliColli has done for the past year.

The Morris Burner hostel has three ranks. The top floor belongs to members of the residential curriculum, who digit between 10 and 20 at any given time. These rent-paying tenants succeed all day-to-day runnings, typically while holding down paid responsibilities abroad. DelliColli entered the program in 2015 after relocating from Syracuse, New York. I visited for four daytimes after I went off the playa last year. Then I went home, immediately packed up all my trash and moved west, he echoes. “Were not receiving” restraint to how long nearby residents can stay. One member helped propel the hostel in 2013 and has lived there ever since.

A view of the bar. Picture: Vincent Cascio

On the second floor of the Morris, “theres” 13 artist-designed rooms available for purposes of short-term clients. The accommodations array from four-bunk dorms ($ 15 – $20 per night) to deluxe suites ($ 95 – $105 per darknes ), and they have themes such as Sparkle Pony and Enchanted Forest. The Reno Music Room is strewn with playable instruments and embellished with flyers of neighbourhood gigs. The walls of the Temple suite outline twilight towers silhouetted against a technicolor sky a reference to the Temple of Transition, a 2011 Burning Man artistry installation that Jungle Jim Gibson worked on. The public can tour abandoned chambers at any time but staying in one compels body. Joining the Morris overheads $20 for a few months or $50 for a year, and deductions refer if you can recite the 10 principles.

Workshops, demonstrates and other incidents such as drum curves and Star Wars-inspired lightsaber fitness classifies are held on the first floor. In June, chef Clint Jolly of the Food Network supported a themed dinner that overhead $75 per head. The Morris has even been used as a marry venue. We try to say yes to as many people as we can, so that we can get as much of the community committed as is practicable, says DelliColli. Even when “there wasnt” scheduled affairs, people can play a round of pool in the Steampunk Saloon or hang out in the open-air quadrangle. Knack is only one of Burning Mans 10 principles, so theres often a layer of homemade muffins or a utensil of soup on offer in the shared kitchen.

The ground at night, including a neon head artwork. Photo: VJC/ Vincent Cascio

The hostel shiftings gears with the approach of Burning Man in August. The planned ramps up with daily workshops enveloping clothing compel, bike maintenance and other festival preparation. The areas journal out as burners assemble in Reno; the city is a popular staging sand due to its proximity to the playa. Neighbourhood voluntaries are announced in to cover for festival-bound faculty. But for the persons who stay behind the issue is Home Burn, the Morris corresponding celebration where a mini idol is lighted in salute. Its for people who maybe couldnt find a ticket but still want to experience a flavor of the smolder, says DelliColli. Unfortunately there isnt opening for everyone on the playa, so we give them a little of the playa right here in Reno.

I convened some of those people at Home Burn last year, but I also encountered beings for whom the Morris is an alternative to Burning Man rather than a substitution. One long-time burner was just telling me hes disillusioned with what he sees as a dilution of Burning Man culture on the playa, and no longer wants to attend. A young lady said she wasnt sure if she considered herself a burner, since shes exceedingly drawn to the arts community circumventing the Morris, but isnt all that interested in the celebration its inspired by. Toward the end of the nighttime, I had whiskey in one of the hostel areas with three non-burners who had driven over from California because it seemed like a good defendant.

No-frills bunk beds in the dorm. Photo: Vincent Cascio

Those road trippers had no way of knowing what an genuine burner know-how the latter are having that night. But I, fresh off the playa, was in a better position to appreciate it. That contest was Burning Man distilled into a house party. It had many of the same intangible qualities, including an resilience around what is normal and what is possible. It also had that sense of belonging that clears welcome home an adequate greeting when you arrive at the Burning Man door. I had already had a great ignite but the Morris provided me with one final spotlight: the disclosure that theres a real-world location where Burning Man never ends.

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