#(generally i feel like it's cheating if i write something that ONLY makes sense if you're familiar with something outside Basic Canon)

[ckret2]

jokes that are mean to my readers because they only make sense if you're familiar with the extremely rare out-of-print blacklight edition of journal 3, and even then you've gotta stop and think about it to connect the dots.

Ford said, "I never learned if the aliens I spoke to were all talking about the same thing, a group of things—or if what I thought they were talking about was a simple translation error for some other term."

Dipper scrunched his nose. "'Translation error,' what? Across multiple civilizations?"

"The dimensional translator I received was somewhat buggy," Ford said. "From time to time it would offer wildly incorrect translations for individual words. For instance, it consistently replaced the word 'soccer ball' with soccer ball, of all things. You can only imagine what kind of trouble that got me into."

Dipper blinked in bafflement, opened his mouth, decided maybe this was a can of worms best opened later, and shut his mouth. 

[tswwwit]

Wait, does the cheating thing on the bond always works? bcs that would be kinda freaky for R!Dipper like imagine you get pinned down by someone in the corner of a br or smthng and then said person kissed you and proceeded to explode into red mist and you literally have no idea what happened.

Also, would the constellation mark be a "cursed" Mark over the years, like you would give birth to a baby and the doctor says "😟 I am so sorry ma'am,,, I'm afraid your baby has the Cipher Companion mark. ( could also be something equally as science-y like Ursa Major, Constellation Calamation, etc idk)" And you just burst into tears.

Would that mean that dipper would get into a special program(demon wrangling program or smthng, demonologist? Maybe)? Or would the parents hide it away hoping that Bill would never take their child away?

(Sorry this au is just very interesting to me,,,, I hope u get more motivation, keep writing author 💪)

These are all options! The fun part of reincarnation AU being left ambiguous is that technically any of them could happen.

[five-thousand-loaves-of-bread]

be constantly in own world for me (level 2/3 autism) mean like. think pretty much only about self. understand only self. entire world just me n special interest, sometimes/often times not even include own basic needs, like “hair greasy clump body itchy need shower” (unconsciously feel bad sensory, n make very uncomfortable annoyed easily frustrated, but don’t consciously know am feeling extra irritated or that am feel this way because need shower). n world often limited to thing in front of me. n sometimes not even include thing in front of me. see it (as in physically capable of vision) but not see it. n thing, people, any that not put infront of me for while, stop realize they existed in first place.

n be in own world, only think only able know self, mean that, see self as normal, as norm. everyone (this abstract concept of other people that have memorized like you memorize history fact for test), everyone like me. not even “am like everyone,” but that everyone is like me. everyone same ability as me. everyone think like me.

“everyone think like that to extent”

right. to extent. thing is am far greater than that normal “extent”

to point that average day, ask me, n would only able explain that, “think everyone same ability as me, everyone think like me. everyone exist like me.” stay at vague generalization because not able think any deeper not able think of examples. to give example in this situation mean on some level need have ability understand “am think this normal but others may think it abnormal for them”. n. most times not have ability to second part, because in own world theory of mind.

sometimes try force it. try really hard force it. try really hard think, look at other people, try make sense try find what exact different. but can’t force something not have ability. so go back rely on scripting. sometimes advanced scripting n rephrased scripting.

special interest in something social-related let me cheat little bit. appear more capable. like break down complex autism community disability community dynamics. but am videotaping camera. computer analyzing research data. not participant. it thankfully happen, but it only happen because special interest allow it be part of own world, n it only part of own world because can only see these (supposedly very humanly n organic n messy) interactions as flow charts, maps, equations, inanimate objects. closest metaphor may be, with this special interest lens that allow these social dynamics enter own world, am looking at these “people” these social dynamics similar to regular person playing the sims n thinking of sims character made out of code that they control.

rare rare times able suddenly realization of outside world. usually happen in flash. n then end. n then left to chase that feeling trying so hard remember what it felt like so can memorize it like another history fact to memorize for test removed from source removed from emotion, to make self appear know what am talking about know more than am capable of, next time someone ask, “isn’t everyone like this?”

just had flash of that that lead to write this whole thing. but already gone. something about… “those funny ‘gen z fix up work force’ stories. they actually people same age as me?’” something about sudden realize what people my age my life stage expected do usually do. something about think am so normal but actually am missing out “so many” things (what things?).

friend tell me “by be young person who severely disabled you missing out so much on same age activities”. n. inside think, (i am but) “don’t know. …am i?” n for it be genuine question, or disbelief question.

n respond with “haha, yea.”

it not lying. it just script. am don’t know what my script means.

don’t follow up by ask me “so what you think you missing out on?”

don’t know. don’t have that script (a script am don’t know meaning to) yet that make other people think am understand, either.

[please don’t say you “relate” or “feel same” “this me” or similar unless am know who you are.]

[number1mingyustan]

Just in Case ☾

bestfriend!seungkwan x fem!reader

Warnings: kissing, cursing, explicit smut, marking, mentions of cheating, protected sex, riding, mentions of oral (f.)

Summary: It was always gonna be you

Word Count: 2.9k

_______________________________________________

(a/n: i really meant it when i said I was planning to be more active. school is still kicking my ass and I've been so unmotived to write I'm sorry. i still have a bunch of unfinished drafts but there's no telling when I'll actually finish them)

You first met Seungkwan in December 2019.

You’d gone out to the club and accidentally spilled your drink on him. In a drunken panic you tried to help, but only ended up making the situation worse and staining his clothes.

However, he didn’t get upset. He just chuckled and told you it was fine and joked about how it wasn’t his best shirt anyway.

You offered to buy him another drink to make up for it, but he politely declined and made another joke about how you’d only end up spilling it on him again.

You apologized again and went your separate ways thinking it would be the last time you saw each other. But of course, fate has a weird way of bringing people together.

Less than 4 hours later he would find you, sneaking out of his roommate's room in his apartment with your dress on backwards.

It wasn’t unusual for Jeonghan to bring a girl home, but he never could have expected it to be the clumsy girl who spilled a drink on him just a few hours prior.

Jeonghan was the first to leave the club with you and Seungkwan went back home later that night with Seokmin.

He got up to get a glass of water before going to sleep and you were there, tiptoeing around his apartment and trying to go unnoticed.

You were doing a horrible job at being quiet, but luckily Jeonghan was a heavy sleeper. Such a heavy sleepover that he didn’t realize you and Seungkwan spent the entire night talking.

Conversation came naturally to you. He was shocked initially, to say the least. But he said one thing to you and the conversation ended up lasting for hours leading into the morning.

There was something so familiar about you. It felt like you’d known each other your entire lives and you could talk so easily. You talked about any and everything together like old friends catching up.

When Jeonghan finally woke up and saw you in the kitchen chatting it up with one of his housemates, he’d assumed you’d woken up just before him. Even now it remains a secret between the two of you that you never slept that night.

Since that day, Boo Seungkwan has been your best friend.

After that night, he invited you to roller skating after finding out it was something you both enjoyed. The two of you hung out more and more over time and you were eventually adopted into the friend group.

You got comfortable with all of them, Joshua, Jihoon, Seokmin, Seungkwan, and even Jeonghan. Despite the very one time hookup, you still consider Jeonghan to now be one of your best friends.

But you’ve always been closest with Seungkwan.

————

“We’re gonna get so fucked up!” You scream to Seungkwan over the loud music in the club.

He shouts back at you in agreement before taking your hand in his. He drags you through the crowd, navigating like an expert and ensuring that you stay close to him.

You make your way to the bar and order your drinks. The bartender is nice, but a little flirty. You can admit he's cute, but he's a little touchy and you're not really feeling him all that much.

Seungkwan can sense your discomfort and nearly startles you when he touches your waist. As soon as you realize it's your best friend, you melt into his touch and all your discomfort has dissolved.

"Sorry," he says. "Didn't mean to scare you. I just wanted him to get the message."

You nod. "I understand, thank you." You smile.

You both down your drinks easily and continue with your night out. You spend the new few hours dancing and singing along to the generic club music. Your best friend stays close to you and he looks out for you like he always does.

"You don't have to stay attached to me all night you know, it's your first night out as a single man in a while." You bump your shoulder against his playfully. "I don't wanna scare off any opportunities for you to meet someone."

"You know I didn't come here looking for anything," He gives you a soft smile.

"That doesn't mean you can't find something," You muse, raising an eyebrow.

He takes a sip from his drink. "Thanks, but no thanks. Let's just have fun tonight."

You shrug, bumping your glass against his before downing the rest of your drink.

The next few hours were spent dancing, laughing and drinking. It was nice to see your best friend let loose again, but the night eventually came to an end and he ordered an uber.

The ride was quiet, but not uncomfortable. The two of you sat leaned against one another in the backseat. The ambiance was comforting, set by the music playing quietly from the radio and the lights from the city surrounding you.

You two enter his apartment together and you immediately throw yourself onto the couch with a sigh of satisfaction. Your eyes fall shut and a smile appears on your face. "My feet were killing me."

Seungkwan crouches down in front of you wordlessly and helps you take off your shoes. You thank him quietly and he disappears into his bedroom.

When your eyes flutter open, he's re-entering the living room with something in hand.

"Here," He hands you a t-shirt of his. "So you don't have to stay in that dress either."

You mouth a 'thank you' before stumbling into the bathroom to change out of your clothes.

"You know," You plop down on the couch next to him. "You still haven't told me why you guys ended things.

Seungkwan sighs. "I know. It's nothing though, don't worry about it. Things just weren't working out, you know?"

"Yeah, it's a shame."

"You didn't even like her," Seungkwan chuckles.

"That's only because she didn't like me first!" You defend. "Never even understood that."

"She was just... nevermind. Doesn't matter now."

"No," You sit up and frown. "Tell me."

He sighs. "She was just kind of jealous of you. Ended up driving the whole relationship into the ground."

A beat.

"You guys broke up because of..me?"

Seungkwan leans his back against the couch. "Like not really... but yeah."

You frown. "Why would you do that?"

"You already knew she didn't like you Y/n."

"Yeah, but you ended a two-year-long relationship. What the hell?"

"Things just weren't working out."

"Yeah... because of me!" You sigh.

"You didn't do anything. She was just jealous and insecure. You ended up being the topic of conversation way more than needed and it was so frustrating. It was a constant argument for those two years and I got exhausted."

"I knew she didn't like me, but I didn't know it was that serious. I feel guilty as hell now, like I ruined your entire relationship."

"You didn't."

"But I did," You frown.

"Do you know how exhausting it was? For two years I had to put up with her turning everything into an argument about you. I was constantly being accused of something and then I'd have to be reassuring her and coddling her like a baby. It was like a never-ending cycle about the same thing Y/n. I could only do that so much before I lose my mind."

You frown. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be, you didn't do anything wrong." He pats your head softly. "Seriously."

"I know I just... feel bad. I feel like I compromised your happiness" You pout.

"You could never. You're my best friend." He gives you a reassuring smile.

He rises to his feet.

"I'm getting tired, are you ready for bed?"

You remain silent, giving him a small nod. About 10 minutes later you find yourself laying in bed next to him. The lights are dim, but you can still make out the features of his face clearly.

You don't know why your heart is suddenly beating so fast. It's so quiet in the room that he just might be able to hear it.

"What's wrong?" He asks.

"Huh?" You mumble. "Nothing."

"You know you can't lie to me," he grins.

"I don't know," You sigh. "You just feel so like... close right now. I don't know."

"Oh," He breathes out. "Do you want me to take the couch? It's never been an issue before."

"No!" You say a little louder than intended. "No," Your voice softens. "I just... what you told me earlier about Hayeon. Like, what if she's right?"

"That there's something romantic between us? I'm not sure I understand you Y/n."

"I mean, you just said it yourself. It's never been a problem for us to sleep in the same bed, but isn't that kind of weird? Like you and I have always been close... but maybe this is too close?"

"I think you're drunk and still hung up on my stuff with Hayeon.

"You're drunk too," You frown.

"Yeah, but I'm not speaking a bunch of nonsense right now." He pushes your hair out of your face softly. "Go to sleep Y/n."

"No," You protest.

"Y/n–"

You weren't really thinking when you kissed him. It just sort of... happened. Granted, he wasn't really thinking when he kissed you back either.

It felt so natural, like you were kissing a lover of 10 years. it was easy to melt into his touch, everything was just so easy with him. Your hands are in his hair, tugging lightly at the blue-tinted strands atop his head.

You let out a soft moan against his lips, pressing your body against his.

You feel like you're floating and drowning all at the same time. Floating on a cloud of bliss while simultaneously drowning deeper and deeper in him.

He pulls away, breathless with swollen lips. You both lay on your side, staring at one another. Neither of you really know what to say. Your heart is still beating out of your chest as you lick your lips slowly, relishing in the lingering taste of him.

"What the hell Y/n?"

"I'm sorry! I don't know," You panic, covering your face in embarrassment.

He sighs, falling onto his back. "Why did you do that?"

"It's not like we've never kissed before."

"Yeah, but not like that. The worst I've ever done with you was barely a peck. That was different."

"You felt it too?"

"What?"

You fall silent. There's a million things running through your head and they're all circling back to him.

"I don't know!"

"That's not a good enough answer.

"That's not fair to me," he frowns.

"Of course I have," he huffs out. "From the very first moment I met you, you made me feel something. It's been what, 5 years? When you left the bar that night, I couldn't stop thinking about you. I was convinced I'd never see you again. And then I did! Yeah you had just fucked my roommate and it was somewhat heart breaking, but from the moment I met you I knew I wanted you in my life. You were just... I don't know. You were shining a little brighter than anyone else in that club. You've got an aura about you that's hard to ignore."

You sit there, completely speechless.

"I know that I felt something for you since that night. I don't know if it really ever went away. I know I loved Hayeon when I was with her, I'm not saying I didn't. I don't know if I've been ignoring what I've felt for you, or if I really did get over it. But you suddenly deciding this now is confusing for me." He frowns.

For the second time that night, you act before thinking yet again. Your lips are on his and you find yourself melting into his touch. He kisses you back, pulling your body on top of his.

You don't know what you're doing or why you're really doing it, but it feels good. It feels right, like it's something you know you won't regret even though it may be confusing.

You straddle his lap and his hands rest comfortable on your lower back. His kisses are addictive, leaving you breathless with a fuzzy head.

You pull away to catch your breath, staring down at him with lust in your eyes. Wordlessly, you feel his shirt off your body and toss it onto the ground.

His eyes go wide and his breath gets caught in his throat. "Are you sure?"

"Never been so sure in my life. I want this... if you do too," you breathe out.

"Course I want this," He responds.

He pulls you back down and reconnects your lips with fervent passion. You grind yourself against him slowly, body moving on its own accord with his.

You tug at his shirt lightly and he breaks the kiss again to pull it off of his body.

"Shit," You breathe out. "Do you have any condoms?"

He nods. "In the drawer."

You reach over to his nightstand and open the drawer. You fish out the small gold package and tear it open with your teeth.

"You know, it's not safe to do that." he muses. "Could poke a hole or something."

"Oh well," You smirk, disposing of the gold packaging. "Maybe you'll just have to knock me up."

He raises an eyebrow at your statement. "Knock you up? But you're my best friend."

You let out a scoff and lean back, rolling the latex on his length. "Don't think.." You lift your hips, slowly sinking down onto him. You wince at the initial feeling. "Don't think I'd be on top of you like this if I was just your best friend."

He breathes out, tilting his head back into the pillow. His nails dig into your hips as he feels himself stretching you out.

You both let out a gasp as you start grinding down on him slowly. He holds you steady by your hips as you start to pick up your pace. you tilt your head back, gripping onto the sheets for support.

"Shit," he breathes out.

Your breathing grows heavier and you find yourself getting lost in the pleasure. It feels so good, so right. It's not fully processing in your head that you're riding your best friend right now.

"Should've done this sooner," You mumble to yourself.

Seungkwan can only nod in agreement. He's in awe watching as you bounce on his cock. The room is still dimly lit, but there's just enough moonlight seeping between the blinds for him to see how gorgeous you are.

He wants this image of you forever etched in his brain. He slides one of his hands from your hip to your inner thigh. Your pace is disrupted when you feel his thumb pressed against your clit.

"Oh fuck," You curse out.

He smirks to himself as he picks but the pace with his finger. You match his movements, falling back into your rhythm as ride him. He leans back deeper into the bed and pushes his hips up to meet you halfway.

His cock now brushes deep inside of you, hitting the same spot that has you struggling to stay quiet. Your nails are digging deeper into his bedsheets and you're whining out loud.

His thumb draws quick circles on your clit and his eyes never leave your frame. He watches you bounce on his cock, filling yourself up and cry out his name.

Fuck. He really regrets not doing this sooner.

He knows he won't last much longer. The intimacy and pleasure of it all is too intense. He applies more pressure on your sensitive bud, causing you to moan louder.

"Close," You warn him breathlessly.

He sits up on the bed, pulling your frame closer against his. His head falls into the crook of your neck. He sucks on your skin, nibbling softly and ensuring he marks you. He knows he might regret this in the morning, but he can't help himself. He has you now and he can't help but want a little reminder.

Moments later you're falling apart in his lap. You gasp your air pathetically as your hips lose rhythm and you tighten around his cock. He's losing his fucking mind.

You squeeze around him, driving him into his own orgasm and milking him for everything he's got. He groans into your skin as he spills his load into the condom.

Both your chests rise and fall against one another as you tap back into your senses. He places one last kiss on your cheek before he lifts you off his lap and lays you on the bed. He disposes of the condom and lays down next to you.

The room falls silent and neither of you is really sure what you should say.

You break the silence. "Now what?"

He shrugs.

"I feel like, like we need to talk about this."

"We should."

"Okay.... so.." You start.

He shushes you lightly, placing a finger on your lips. "Later."

You blink at him slowly. “What?”

He ignores you, pulling you in by the legs. “Later.”

“Is now a bad time?” Your voice is filled with confusion.

"No, it’s just you know…," he strokes your arm softly. "If we wake up tomorrow and decide this isn't for the better, I want to have at least had a taste."

You eyes go wide.

He smirks at you, pulling your body closer to his. "Just in case, y'know?"

You bite your lower lip, meeting his suggestive gaze.

"Yeah," You lean into his touch, allowing him to pin you down on the bed. "Just in case."

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© number1mingyustan - Do not repost without permission.

[nicromancytarot]

WILL YOU BE FAMOUS?

This is a general reading based on a collective of people. Take what resonates and leave what doesn’t. If you don’t feel the pile resonates with you, don’t be scared to try another, if it still doesn’t feel right, that’s ok! Maybe our energies aren’t as connected and my readings are not for you.

I do these strictly for fun and educational purposes. I don’t change for these readings and I do not fake readings. I would tell you the cards I got but I pull like 20-30 cards each reading and that just slightly a strenuous task to write them all down lmao.

PICK A CARD READING

I asked my spirit guides if you would ever get the chance of being famous, pick a picture to find out.

DISCLAIMER: when doing this reading I did not quite realise the relevance of famous can range from having a viral video on TikTok to actual worldwide fame, so I will redo this with social media to worldwide sometime soon!

Pile 1 ———> Pile 2 ———> Pile 3

Pile 4 ———> Pile 5 ———> Pile 6

PILE 1

YES! Once again I received a pile based on helping others lmao, I see you guys receiving extreme wealth from speaking and acting on humanitarian causes. Heavy protesting energy. You will however receive some hate for this so be careful! You may stick to only social media but will become very abundant nonetheless.

PILE 2 (18+ themes)

YES! I see this being something you never imagined being able to do, I notice a lot of wands in this spread so you could lowkey become famous for doing porn, or other sex related work.

However, for those of you who don’t resonate with that, you may be doing something to do with the public in a way of singing or speaking. (The wands remind me of microphones.)

There is a sense of secrecy which was why I was getting sex work lol, but if not, I can see you may have some fans who will attempt to gatekeeper you as you grow.

PILE 3

YES! This pile was very hard to decipher because there’s so many ways this could go, first being that you gain social media fame from getting into a physical fight with someone (this is so weird but i saw someone sat doing a get ready with me while covering up bruises and trying to explain how they got there while assuring everyone that they won lmaoo.) Or you may be exposing a past relationship for being toxic (I feel like this would be a partner in the industry.)

I see you have an opportunity to keep this fame from dying out which can lead you to a new lover if you’re interested in that, you guys may even get married sometime in the future. If not then I definitely see business opportunities coming your way.

PILE 4

YES! This will only resonate with some of you that’s for sure, but I see that you may have a situation where a lover cheats on you (sorry) and you may record either an argument, the breakup or some big tantrum that they throw and post it to social media to humiliate them #slay. The video will certainly go viral but you will receive a lot of mixed reactions so beware. You may also have the potential or growing this fame if you stay consistent and keep it exciting.

PILE 5

Unfortunately I don’t see this in the cards for you. I see that you have a large amount of worry for hatred and criticism and you may just want to live a peaceful, quiet life. I see that you certainly value your peace and would run from the hatred if you got it. I also notice that you may already, or will have a leadership job or opportunity that you won’t want to pass up on. So don’t dwell, you have freewill so if you really desire fame, go for it.

PILE 6

I unfortunately don’t see this in the cards for you. I notice that you totally have the potential (and freewill!) to make ir happen if you really wanted. But I also see that you are never really happy or fulfilled. I think someone told you that you can’t make it happen and I feel that’s why you stopped trying. Do not give up, you never know the difference you could make.

[pvnks0ul]

when i kissed the teacher (18+)

◈ professor!riri w. x fem!reader

sypnosis: When the course of her marriage has run awry, Riri finds herself entertaining your little crush on her.

⚠︎: deluded & kinda obsessed!reader, college student!reader, age gap, cheating, a lil dramatic coz it's in readers pov mostly, older (think late 20s-early 30s) + married!riri, car ess ee ecks, strap on (reader receiving) + oral (RW receiving), no resolve (sry lol), lil plot 4 🌽, sub!reader/Dom!riri, smut under the cut + ! amateur writing ! (Your only warning)

"Mhmm..fuck–!" Riri mewls as her hand shoves your head deeper into her cunt, your tongue pacing the most intimate part of her before licking a stripe up to her clit, kneading it just how she taught you, "Y-yeah, just like that."

Riri knew no argument would justify her continuous crimes of adultery but with you being just around the corner conveniently after each one made it easy to cough up excuses. She was very aware of the crush you had on her, so she always made sure to smile in your very general direction, calling on you first if your hand was raised because she liked the way you'd bashfully take on th challenge, even if you weren't completely sure of it.

It's not like you were a saint either. Infact, some would say you were even worse. Especially after you were caught spitefully facing the wedding picture of her and Raven, the wife, down in the early mornings if you arrived to class before her. She tried to talk to you about how disrespectful it was, but you didnt seem to care as she didnt even notice till you said something about her ring.

That landed you your first referal from her, alone. You liked riri, but were still highly upset! You just wanted her to focus in class with no distractions. You weren't actually trying to be disrespectful. Riri senses this from across the room. She watches you solemnly after you'd rolled your eyes at her. And that was just unacceptable, she had to make sure you knew that which is why she makes sure the door is locked, checking the empty hallways and unpinning the little piece of fabric that covers the window in the door before pulling out a chair next to your desk.

You'd been acting out of character alot lately and she just wanted to check in. She cared a little too much & got a little too close. The supportive hand on your knee, turned into you laying your head on her shoulder, and ended with her blouse sleeves rolled up to her elbows as she worked her way knuckle deep between your sticky thighs, lowly whispering praises as you spread yourself to accept more of her from under the desk.

When it's over, your looking at her with nothing but pure unfiltered adoration and it's bad for Riri. It's terrible for her because she doesn't feel like she just did the worst thing possible by betraying her wife instead, she was thinking about when the next time she'd be able to have you again.

Mewling around her mound, you find yourself desperate for her approval. Your brown orbs glancing up for her usual nod of approval only to find her head is thrown back against the seat of her car. Thats how you know she really needed this and you cant blame her. Spending all day in a stuffy classroom only to come home to a nagging incompetent wife just couldnt be a desirable life for anyone, you tear up sometimes just thinking about how hard it must be for Riri.

"C'mon baby." she grunts, her eyes finally gracing you, her lids were low but still, it was enough to motivate you. You groan into her at the petname, circling her clit before sucking it into your mouth and she ruts against you desperately. Your only purpose was to make her bust in your mouth again.

It takes just a few more seconds of you lapping over her pussy to have her quivering thighs clenching around your head. And you love it, the lack of air encouraging you to continue, if anything. Riri grinds her hips against your face, a hint of a whine slips past her lips as she rides her high out on you. You keep going, trying to lick her dry, suckling right from her creamy hole, Riri sucks her bottom lip under her teeth at the sight and she wants you to keep going but once she reaches the end of it she's pulling your head away by your ponytail, not wanting to overstimulate herself. You whine at this, but settle for laying your head on her quaky leg until she comes down.

"C'mere." Riri demands in a hush tone. You use her sticky thighs as support to lift yourself up, sliding right into her lap, your thighs being separated by her bare one and she grips your chin, forcing you impossibly closer into her bubble. Her dark brown almost black orbs hypnotic and locking you in their lustfilled haze as they dropped to your wet lips before back up to your blown out eyes.

You're so beautiful and she cant tell you that because she knows how you get. It was an aggravating cycle. She'll give you a compliment and then you'll bombard her with a good 50 or so questions concerning reasons why she won't choose you than.

And every single time it always ends up with you sulking back into the passenger seat, not wanting to finish anything you started as fat tears cascaded down your cheeks, asking her to drop you off or notably ditching her class the next day.

So she admires you in secret while her thumb swipes away at the slick of your full bottom lip. She brings it to her own mouth, sucking her juices off her finger in one swift motion. You gape at the vulgar display infront of you.

She brings her face closer and a gasp slips past your lips, now brushing lightly against the other, "You're gonna get in trouble.." You speak, referring to your lipstick stained lips, developing a perfect pout and Riri has no choice but to give in. She rolls her eyes before tilting her head and leaning forward, "..If that happens I'll handle it." she corrects you, finally connecting your mouths in a dreamy kiss, you push your chest into hers with a moan, kissing back with just as much intensity and her rough hands drop to fiddle with the ends of your skirt, pushing the fabric up your plush hips.

She smirks against you when she finds that you dont have any panties on, she lays her hand dormant on your mound excluding her thumb as she uses it to dip between your warm folds, cooing proudly to find it absolutely sopping. You press your chests together her with a whimper, "m-more, Riri!"

She complies, "Course..", her fingers playing with the tip of your puffy clit, your hips twitching into them, "What is it? Can't handle me no more?" she mumbles. You shake your head no, you were just so sensitive because of how busy and negligent– she’d been this week when you were becoming accustomed to getting her every night. It felt like you would cum right now if she'd asked for it.

Riri smirks at the sour expression on your face, "All you want is for someone to rub on your pretty little clit, huh?" her cool breath fans your burning cheeks as you shamelessly follow each roll of her thumb across the bud,

You nod your head at whatever she just said and she knows that look on your face, you’re close... but already?

Just when you're on the brink of a climax, you grab at her wrist and yank it away from your heat, your thighs closing with a quickness. Riri cuts her eyes at you, curious to what you're doing. You wanted to finish with her inside but if you so much as let her get a few more strokes in, it'd be too late because you don’t think you have energy to go again.

You pant against her dress shirt as she holds you up with her hands around your back, "Do you have it with you?"

And Riri catches onto what you mean, she settles you with one hand while reaching in the small black tote bag in the backseat with wet fingers.

"When I'm coming to see you..." . She returns with the harness–attached dildo and you can feel your hole clench around nothing at just the thought of being full again. "Always." she speaks in that raspy tone.

"Up." Riri taps your side, signalling you to move so she can slide it pass her thighs and you happily abide.

She guides you over it once its secured, using your slick as lubricant for her dark brown piece she lines it up with your hole and settles it half way in.

Your eyes are already closing shut as the curved girthed allowed it to touch both sides of your walls, "Nmph-! Fuck!", Your hips twitch, not sure if you can handle all of it, worried she's too big. How'd you ever get it all in before?!

Riri disagrees, gripping the globes of your ass, spreading them as she pushed her pelvic up into you, opening you to fit her like a glove with each thrust earning her high pitched shudders against her ear as you held her dress shirt between closed fists, "S'too much.."

She scoffs at this, "You wanna be good for me, right?" She whispered lowly, rubbing at the smooth skin of your hips.

"Y-yeah, for y-you–!" You groan while holding her face in your hands, admiring all the little details you could see from up here and Riris chest burns at your words, more specifically the last bit. You never failed to keep her wrapped around your fingers when you always said shit like that.

Riri kisses your palm before bottoming out with a final push in. Your spine feels like it'll break from how fast you arched it on impact, your wet clit pressing into the bottom of her white shirt and waist band of her boxers and you're already shaking against her.

Riri holds the ends of the back of your thighs, trying to be patient and wait for you to calm down but you whimpering in the crease of her neck was not helping, she swallows thickly, thinking of ways to try and prevent herself from slamming you down on her dick, "...lemme know when."

It takes a good minute for the pain to subside, for you to feel the familiar inkling of heat in the pit of your belly, waiting to blaze so, you swirl your hips a bit, the tip scraping the bottom of your cervix with each one and you desperately need more.

"Oh fuck!" you use Riris shoulders to lift yourself a few inches before plunging, your sap drenching her legs and creating a noticeable puddle on the fabric under the strap from how long you were warming her.

The girth of her faux brushing your walls almost teasingly from how horrible you were at fucking yourself, but with the way your thighs were starting to burn so easily, you wouldn’t be able to do finish on your own. You just needed a little bit of help.

"Please.." You whined into her, buzzing with ecstasy, messy thighs pathetically quivering as you opened yourself for her viewing pleasure, "I– just want you to fuck me, Riri.." she doesnt hear whatever else you managed to slur, too busy eying your pussy in awe of your pink slit just barely swallowing all 8 inches down to the base.

She quiets you with a sweeter more innocent kiss while pressing the button on the side to recline her seat, letting you rest while she takes care of it.

Riri grabs you by your waist, your head tucked as your shuddered breaths pricked the skin of her neck, steadily she ascends your lower half before bringing you back down with a wet slush, repeating her steps over again. Each gasp gets stuck in your throat as her dick stretches you out and stirs all the creaminess inside, making goosebumps rise on your skin with every thrust.

You whine louder, acrylics breaking through the sleek material of her shirt, nipping her skin as you felt the fire in your belly turn inflammatory, she was fucking you so good and you didnt want her to stop but the clenching was inevitable, halting her strokes in their place with each one.

Riri reluctantly slows to a stop, she could feel your ass jiggling but now she wanted to see it all for herself. Your eyes dart open immediately after, and you're frowning down at her because you were so close.

"Turn around, I wanna see sum."

Riri holds your thighs and the base of the strap so she can pull out smoothly. They slide up to your waist when you sat down with your back to her chest and you could feel her pebbled nipples against your skin.

She bites down harshly on her bottom lip as she enters you again, your crying and panting as she sunk deeper but she knew you'd get off better this way.

"Yeah, i know..." she coos sincerely trying to soothe your nerves, "...but you gotta take all of it f'me." she holds you down with her free hand as she effortlessly grazed that soft spot once again, grinding into you at an unsteady rhythm.

Riri pushes your back in and your back forms a perfectly sharp arch, she grabs handfulls of the flesh in one hand before smacking down on the other. The pained yelp you let out contrasted drastically to the gush of juices you leaked over her dick and already messy boxers. She does it again, switching sides and kneading the sore skin of the one that got spanked then spreading to see the aftermath.

Riri groans at the sight of clear strings creating ill shaped webs dripping at both holes. Boldly, she releases your ass and presses her thumb into the crease, going all the way down, lubricating the pad before pressing into your button. You whimper at her curious prodding & rubbing but never once did you tell her to stop.

Your head lowers in shame from how much you were enjoying this as you gave her a better angle to fuck you from, just shutting your eyes as you let her have her way with you.

Riri bounces you on her lap a few times, the sound of your pussy turning her on even more, "You're real dirty, baby." She mocks while removing her thumb, drawing her arms around your waist and forcefully bringing you back to her chest, her faux shifting inside of you.

She moves down your mound, brushing over the tip of your clit before thrumming harder, playing with the silky bud. You squeak & squirm, reaching down to try and stop her but all she does is thrust her hips up in response.

Everything was starting to move too fast for you as she swirled all 4 of her fingers over your sensitive nub, her hips working into you at the same time and all you could do was pathetically wait for it to come crashing down.

"God—ah! 'gonna make me cum!" you wail pitifully and it really is pathetic how quick it was but you truly couldnt help it.

"Uh-huh..." She hums, her grip becoming harsh as she pulls on you with so much vigor your ass starts to clap against her bare thighs. Riri bites her bottom lip as she fucks you harder, your pussy squelching endlessly just for her, "Go 'head then baby, dont make me wait for it." You nearly go cross-eyed at her accent, sloppily grinding your clit into her gungy palm for more stimulation as she brings you over the edge with a final roll of her hips.

Your whole body spasms as you cry out her name, Riri watches in amazement, her hands gripping on your hips and leaving deep dents in their wake as you whine and pant and tremble ontop of her.

"Breathe, mama." she encouraged before she kissed behind your ear. Riri continues to pump you sloppily, helping you through the overstimulation since your thighs were still trembling and you weren't forming coherent sentences. Just biting down on your already swollen lips as a desperate attempt to hide the taboo eruption, clinging onto her for dear life and Riris buzzing under you. She wants to fuck you again. Have your short acrylics scratching up her back, neck and thighs but she knows it’s not a good idea. Especially since you’d definitely miss your curfew for the umpteenth time.

She's gauging your every move before she takes a chance and leans in, grazing her teeth at the bottom of your neck to prep for the fresh row of hickies even when she knows she shouldn’t be leaving evidence muttering, “You did so good f’me.” After each one and she prays it distracts you enough for her to effectively slide her wet piece out.

was kinda scared to post this one butttt, imma thug it out for my riri girlies ‹𝟹🥲

🔖: @sapphicbarbz @shurislover @s0lam33y (special thanks to @lppriceisright for proof-reading some of this for me!!)

[neptunedivine]

astro observations pt. iv

✧ more saturn observations ✧

✧ Whenever Saturn moves into Aries, I feel like that’s going to be a “no bullshit” season. I’m not sure of the details but in theory, it sounds very blunt, upfront, and in your face. Whatever this karma is, you can’t ignore it.

✧ If the writers currently don’t get their well-deserved justice during this Saturn transit (which the more I think about would be very weird if they didn’t), I think the dust will finally settle—end-all-be-all— during the Gemini Saturn transit since Gemini rules over writing.

✧ Speaking of Gemini Saturn, I feel like the internet for politicians in the states is like the Wild West. I fully believe they have no clue what they’re doing. If they do lay down some form of structure (maybe restrictions but I’m not sure) during the Gemini Saturn transit would make sense.

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE LOOK INTO SATURN TRANSITS IF YOU WANT TO MAKE CAREER MOVES!!

✧ As a student in computer science, I saw so many people getting jobs in tech left and right, getting certificates, and going to boot camps and everything (made me feel like shit but I digress). Also, we all saw the major influx of influencers too. I highly recommend looking into what sign Saturn is transiting to help you in your dream career. It’s not like a boost overnight, but it is stable and if you work hard and stay disciplined, Saturn will reward you. The only warning is that you must do it the right way, I wouldn’t consider any shortcuts or cheating. ✧ Though a lot of people got jobs in tech in the last few years when Saturn was in Aquarius, a lot of people (mainly project managers) lost their jobs when Saturn moved into Pisces. I think this because PMs were the easy way in, it’s basically like being a general manager in tech, no programming or code is really involved in their role.

Here are some benefitted professions for the upcoming transits. Note: If something doesn’t align right now or doesn’t at all, these transits aren’t end-all-be-all! There are so many transits happening all the time that can be beneficial as well.

✧ Saturn in Pisces (March 2, 2023 - February 13, 2026) : for my creatives (especially my singers, musicians, actors, photographers, and visual artists), spiritual workers, mental health workers, etc. ✧ Saturn in Aries (February 14, 2026 - April 12, 2028) : for my entrepreneurs, models, athletes, trainers, any profession that requires physical activity and/or competition and challenges, etc. ✧ Saturn in Taurus (April 13, 2028 - May 30, 2030) : for my bakers, cooks, chefs, designers of all kinds, fashionistas, beauticians, and anything to do with beautifying, etc. ✧ Saturn in Gemini (June 1, 2030 - July 13, 2032) : for my bloggers, writers, teachers, journalists, anything to do with communication, media, language(s), etc.

that’s all for now. see you later!

[ghostinthegallery]

Quick drabble, for distraction purposes

Szarekh & Orikan (Szarekh/Imotekh mentioned)

Orikan swore this was the last summons would ever answer from the Silent King.

The king’s command protocols had yet to remove themselves from his mind. Szarekh had declared they would do so, but only once they had all entered their sleep. Part of Orikan feared he would awaken and still feel the dreadful impulse to obey, but deep down he knew that Szarekh was many things—arrogant, foolish, full of hubris—but he was not a liar. 

Orikan translated down to the surface of a moon orbiting Mandragora. The entrance of a modest tomb complex stood before him. He passed the carved with glyphs of protection and rest that would have once adorned a tomb of a dead necrontyr. Specifically a dead military necrontyr.

This was a soldier’s grave.

Orikan passed rows of warriors and immortals already at rest, though they stood as if they could fight at any moment. Orikan was amongst the last of his kind to enter his stasis. He was still running calculations, trying to ensure no damage would come from the drift of planets and stars while the Sautekh slept. A vital duty, if one he might be tempted to…use to his advantage.

His metal feet hit the stone floor with eerie clicks. A tomb spyder scanned him and evidently decided he was no threat. Orikan continued to the inner sanctum, which held a single sarcophagus. A simple, blackstone coffin, barely embellished with silver and bronze. Orikan’s tail flicked in annoyance.

The greatest general of the necrons deserved better than a box.

Imotekh the Stormlord already lay still in his tomb. Orikan could see his face through clear glass. His oculars were dark, but the tomb hummed with the power emitted from the stasis device keeping him alive. 

A shape moved in the shadows. It was not another canoptek as Orikan had frist thought. The shape was tall, lean. Green light glinted off of bronze necrodermis.

Orikan bowed, hating the treacherous body in which the star gods had trapped him for yielding to the urge so quickly.

“Hail, Silent King.” His vocal actuator likewise betrayed him and spoke the greeting.

Szarekh waved his fingers and Orikan rose, as if an invisible hand had ceased pressing on his back.

“What do you want?” Orikan said with as few glyphs of respect as his engrams would allow.

Szarekh did not speak. The bastard hardly ever did. He barely paid Orikan any mind at all. He stepped forward, reached out his hand, and placed it on the side of Imotekh’s tomb.

“I thank you for coming, master astromancer.”

Orikan huffed. Szarekh had done something like this in fleshtimes as well. Writing when he wanted to make his words known, but did not want to take on the hekatic weight of speech. Orikan had always thought of it as cheating.

“I come at your command,” Orikan replied, with all the venom he could muster.

Szarekh nodded, continuing to run his fingers along the edge of the Stormlord’s coffin. His touch was tender, and even Orikan could sense a longing in the Silent King’s oculars.

“I request a favor of you, Diviner.”

Now Orikan was surprised. Kings did not make requests. They spoke their will into existence and their lessers scrambled to ensure reality matched their vision. Orikan kept waiting for the compulsion to listen and obey that the c’tan had programmed into his mind, but it never came.

“What…do you want?” he asked.

Szarekh let out a static sigh. “Imotekh…will he awaken?”

“Imotekh?” Orikan shook his head. “Why would he not—”

He stopped himself. Obviously there were many reasons one might not awaken. Mechanical failures were barely a concern, and Orikan had already read the movements of the stars. Their tombs were hidden from the Old One’s science experiments—orkoids and aeldar. The only true risk was…

“You fear a rival will destroy him?”

Szarekh nodded once. Immediately Orikan’s neural buffer flooded with questions. What rivals? From within the dynasty? Surely no noble would be stupid enough to destroy the Sautekh’s greatest weapon. More likely an outsider would desire to kill the general while he slept. That would weaken them immediately. Then again, necrons were as petty as the necontye had been. Imotekh had angered enough people in his time. Orikan could imagine so many cowards going out of their way to kill the Stormlord while they had the chance

“Why do you care?” Orikan demanded. “What business is it of yours? Nemesor Imotekh has spoken out against you more than any other necron.”

The general had never disobeyed directly, but he had questioned Szarekh’s strategies in the War in Heaven. He’d made his opinion of Szarekh’s Great Sleep clear. Orikan hated to admit it, but he admired Imotekh for that. And he did not hand out his admiration easily.

Apparently he wasn’t alone.

Szarekh was staring at the general’s sleeping face. Orikan had been terrible at reading expressions back when they had proper faces, instead of unmoving deathmasks. He was even worse at it now. But the sorrow in the room was palpable. An interstitial presence Orikan could not deny. Szarekh’s reget and desire permeated the tomb like a miasma, which left Orikan even more confused.

“My exile begins soon. I will never see him again, but please, Diviner, make sure that he wakes up.” 

Before Orikan could respond, green light covered the Silent King. He vanished, leaving his hand upon Imotekh’s sarcophagus until the moment he disappeared.

Orikan shook his head and ran a diagnostic on his engrams. He was half-sure he’d hallucinated all that. But no. He had not. Szarekh had just asked him to guard the sleeping soldier’s tomb.

Not that he’d waited for Orikan to agree. He almost marched out of the place to spite the ruler, but instead he sat down and crossed his legs. He expanded his chest as if he were taking a meditative breath. The cosmos opened themselves to him, like a mother opening their arms to a child.

It took him time to untangle the threads of potential. What he found took him aback. Imotekh would not wake. He would be killed as he slept. Orikan could not see by whom. It kept changing every time he looked. A phoenix lord, a rival noble, someone within the Sautekh, someone after revenge, even creatures Orikan did not even recognize.

And in every future he saw, the Silent King mourned. It was bitter and desperate, and even the echo dug icy claws into Orikan’s core. Almost enough to make him scream with the need to weep when he no longer had tears.

Orikan cast that aside. He did not care if Szarekh got upset over a dead sandborn. However, Orikan did care about the Sautekh dynasty. He had tethered himself to it and therefore needed the noble house to succeed. 

Not to mention he would rather live in a universe with Imotekh than without. Their nobles were worse than useless. The Stormlord was the true power. Orikan had so few people he respected. It would be a shame to lose one. 

So he began to weave his own tapestry of causality. And in this tapestry, Imotekh arose in flux-soaked glory. Violence, darkness, conquering tides of silver. All the price for dragging the soldier from the jaws of his fate. 

Orikan swore this was the last order he would ever obey from the Silent King.

[m1ckeyb3rry]

── PEREGRINE // TWO

Series Synopsis: The ways that you and Seishiro Nagi fall together and fall apart over the years.

Chapter Synopsis: You and May hang out at the mall before going to dinner with Reo, Ryosuke, and Nagi.

Series Masterlist

Pairing(s): Nagi x Reader, Kira x Reader

Chapter Word Count: 6.1k

Content Warnings: unhealthy relationships, cheating, non-linear narrative, probably ooc, angst, nagi is endgame, kira sucks, alternate universe, original characters

A/N: ok so i lowkey hate writing nagi atm simply because he is a character who (imo) NEEDS a build up to feel like he actually cares abt someone instead of being generally apathetic. but in this part of the story we’re like…past that build up if that makes sense?? so he feels weird to me rn since he’s the product of character development that’s happened chronologically but not narratively. idk that was a long rant for no reason LMAO i hope you guys don’t hate the chapter.

divider credits: @/benkeibear

You were awoken from a pleasant dream whose contents you could not remember by banging on the room door. When Ryosuke only groaned and mumbled something violent in response, you realized that it fell to you to see what was happening. Yawning and rubbing your eyes, you rolled out of bed and stumbled over to the entrance, swinging it open to find a straight-faced Reo and a playfully irritated May.

“What happened to not sleeping, huh?” May said, poking you in the forehead.

“We weren’t sleeping,” you said, though your statement was punctuated by another yawn, somewhat detracting from its validity.

“That’s believable,” Reo said.

“Oh, that’s enough out of you,” you said. “What’s up? Why’re you guys here?”

“We were going to show you around, remember?” May said.

“You weren’t answering our texts and calls, so we came to see how you were doing in person,” Reo said, his expression uncharacteristically sour.

“Don’t mind him,” May said. “He’s just mad because he lost one of our bets.”

“What was it this time?” you said. For as long as they had been acquainted, Reo and May had constantly been making lighthearted bets against one another, and it seemed that even with their wedding looming so close, their games had not ceased any.

“It was a stupid bet,” Reo grumbled. “I was so sure I was going to win, but my own best friend betrayed me!”

“Me?” you said, pointing at yourself. “What, because I fell asleep? Did you seriously bet I was going to stay awake? You should’ve known better.”

“So you were asleep!” May said.

“Er,” you said. “Well, there’s no point in hiding it. Yeah, we were.”

“Shame on you,” May said.

“Actually, I’m talking about Nagi,” Reo said. “I bet that he wouldn’t come to dinner with all of us later tonight, because it would be way too much of a chore.”

“That’s a pretty sensible option,” you said. “He doesn’t really do things unless they’re easy for him.”

“Exactly my point!” Reo said. “See? I’m not stupid!”

“Maybe neither of you know him as well as I do,” May said with a mysterious shrug. “I guessed he was going to come, and guess what? He is!”

“It’s just not plausible for you to know him better than me!” Reo said. “Y/N, sure, that makes sense. She barely ever talked to him, so it’s not impossible for you to have the upper hand if you’re betting against her. But me? Me? That’s — it’s — it’s just preposterous, that’s what it is!”

“He’s taking this pretty personally,” you observed.

“I know,” May said. “It’s really funny. Every time I pretend like I might know more than him about you or Nagi, he freaks out. The trick is that most of the time, he actually does win bets involving the two of you. I just really ham up the few times that I do win, so it seems like I’m some kind of clairvoyant genius or something.”

“Maybe you’re not clairvoyant, but you’re definitely comedic,” you said. “I’m grateful you’re the one marrying him. He needs someone that keeps him on his toes.”

“It’s a duty I take seriously,” she said. “Anyways, is that fiancé of yours going to come with us or not?”

“Oh, right,” Reo said, his anger dissipating entirely. “That was the other question. Will he want to be there?”

“I’ll make him come to dinner for sure,” you said. “I don’t know if he’ll want to go shopping, though. I can ask.”

“You don’t have to,” May said.

“True,” Reo said. “The three of us could just hang out. It’d be like old times.”

“I’d feel embarrassed third-wheeling you two,” you said. “What would I do when you started getting all lovey-dovey? It would be really awkward if I didn’t even have anyone there to commiserate with.”

“You’re such a baby,” May said. “It’ll be fine. We’ll keep our PDA to a minimum.”

“I’ve known Reo for too long,” you said, pointing at where his hand was already intertwining with hers. “Asking him to refrain from PDA is a cruel and unusual punishment that I could never inflict, even if it was for my own personal comfort.”

“That’s true,” she said, leaning against him slightly. It was the kind of love that was so assured they did not even have to think twice about it. It came naturally, simply. There was no facade to be maintained, no perfect image that was always mere seconds away from shattering entirely.

“Right, so let me just wake Ryosuke up and see what he says,” you said, though of course, you didn’t need to. Perhaps there was not as much love between you and him as there once had been, but your understanding had only grown in the years that had passed, so you could predict his answer with perfect accuracy before you had even asked the question.

He was already stirring when you returned to his side, running his fingers through his hair and drinking from the bottle of water that the hotel staff had so kindly left on our bedside.

“Morning, babe,” he said to you.

“It’s actually afternoon,” you said.

“It’s morning somewhere,” he said. You rolled your eyes.

“Sure,” you said. “Look, Reo and May are here. They’re going to take us to the mall and show us around, and then we’ll all go to dinner together.”

“Okay,” he said. “Give a minute and I’ll meet you all outside.”

“You’ll come shopping?” you checked.

“Of course I will. I need to make sure you don’t buy anything unfashionable,” he said, winking at you cheekily. You did not respond in kind.

“We’ll wait in the hotel lobby,” you said. You wanted to badly to believe that he was being like this because seeing Reo and May had reminded him of what your life used to be like, but the truth was probably just that he had not had the chance to see another woman in some time and was therefore feeling fonder of you because you were his only option, as he was yours.

“He’ll meet us in the lobby,” you said to Reo and May, taking your purse off of the hook by the entrance. The strap rested on your shoulder as you made sure you had one of the copies of the key in your wallet before shutting the door behind you, trusting Ryosuke would lock it.

“If he takes too long, we’ll leave without him,” May said. Reo did not say anything, but considering his policy of being as polite at all times as he could manage, it was as good as an agreement on his part. You supposed May must’ve made clear her dislike to Reo, although if you were recalling correctly, Reo had never exactly been Ryosuke’s number-one-fan, either. He was just better about hiding it than May and Chigiri, both of whom were all but open about their true feelings towards him.

“He won’t,” you said. “He’s basically ready. He just had to use the bathroom, I think.”

“I was just saying,” she said. “It would be in character for him to take forever, is all. What did Chigiri always call him? A peacock bastard or something?”

“Believe it or not, he still calls him that,” you said.

“To his face?” Reo said, eyebrows shooting up. “That’s gutsy, even for him.”

“I knew I liked him for a reason,” May said.

“Not exactly to his face, considering he refuses to even look at Ryosuke. Apparently, it breaks him out,” you said. “And you know how he is about his skin care, Reo.”

Reo, who had been Chigiri’s roommate just as you had been May’s, made a face in acknowledgment, likely recalling as you were the bottles upon bottles of expensive lotions and hair products that Chigiri had invested most of his allowance and, later, salary in.

“He’s not wrong, per se,” May said. “I can feel an itch under my skin as well, just from being around him for so long.”

“I hope that you can get over your allergy on this trip, then,” you said. “Considering he’s going to be at your wedding, and you’ll be at mine.”

“He’s only here as your plus one,” May said.

“That doesn’t change the fact that he’s here,” you said slowly, like you were explaining the concept to a child.

“No, but it does mean that I didn’t invite him,” she explained. Reo tried to cover his snicker by hiding his mouth behind his hand, but considering his eyes still scrunched at the corners and glittered with mirth, he was overall unsuccessful.

“Just be nice to him, please,” you said. “It’s my life you’re making harder. At least with Chigiri, there’s that old rivalry to explain it, but you’re just going out of your way to be rude.”

“You’re right,” Reo said, suddenly guilty, shoving his hands in his pockets and shrugging up his shoulders high as a defense from your disappointment. “We’ll call a truce for the duration of the wedding.”

“We will?” May said.

“May, she promised to get along with Nagi for us,” he said. “It’s the least we owe her.”

“Stop bringing Nagi up,” you said, shifting from foot to foot uncomfortably.

“Sorry,” Reo said. May pursed her lips but nodded, though she looked more contemplative than unwilling, as if some new information had suddenly been revealed to her. You couldn’t be sure what information that might’ve been, exactly, but since she did not reveal her hand, you were left to guess.

Ryosuke stepped out of the elevator a few moments later, wearing a new set of clothes and an easy grin. He waved at the receptionist when he passed her, and then he crossed the room to stand at your side, though you noticed he did not even try to put his arm around your body or his hand on your own. He seemed more like a particularly close friend than a lover, and you trained your gaze on the ground instead of reaching out for him as you could have.

“Hope I didn’t keep you guys waiting for long,” he said. May shook her head, smiling at him as best she could. She must’ve picked up that political savvy from Reo, who had a natural-born charm which endeared him to all.

“It’s not a problem,” she said. Ryosuke seemed taken aback by the sudden switch in her demeanor, but he took it in stride.

“Alright,” he said. “Should we get going, then?”

“Yes, that sounds good. Should we take one car or two?” Reo said.

“I vote two,” you said, wanting to give Reo and May the privacy that would be hard-won in the coming weeks. May nodded.

“Agreed. I call having Y/N with me!” she said, wrapping herself around your bicep and batting her eyelashes at Reo.

“Okay,” he said through gritted teeth. “Looks like it’s you and me, Kira.”

“Fine by me,” Ryosuke said.

“Wait, May, don’t you want to spend some time with Reo?” you said. “You guys are going to be so busy getting ready for the wedding soon, so you’ll barely have any moments alone with him.”

“We have our entire lives to spend together,” she said, smiling fondly at Reo. “And I haven’t seen you in years. Of course I want to go with you!”

“If you say so,” you said.

“We’ll meet you there,” Reo said, walking towards the first car waiting in the pickup lane of the hotel, Ryosuke following after him. You and May waited for them to drive off and the second car to pull up before you, too, exited the hotel lobby and got into the backseat together.

“Alright, now that those two are gone, let’s get to the real stuff,” May said, rubbing her hands together.

“What real stuff?” you said. She beamed.

“I want to know what’s up with you!” she said.

“I always text you whenever something happens,” you said. “So you’re pretty much all caught up. Not that there’s really much to catch up on.”

“Why haven’t you picked a wedding day?” she said.

“It’s always straight to the point with you, isn’t it?” you said. “I don’t know. I just don’t feel ready to get married yet.”

“You’re the one who’s holding back?” she said.

“I’ve always been the one holding back,” you reminded her. “Even when we were in college. If you’ll recall, he had to try quite a lot to get me to agree to go out with him.”

“That’s true, but now that the two of you are together, I would’ve said for sure that Mr. ‘I’m-Scared-of-Commitment’ would’ve been the one making a fuss about having to actually get married,” she said.

You almost caved. You almost opened your mouth and told her that it was because you resented Ryosuke, resented him as much if not more than you loved him, and you could not marry someone like that. But neither could you leave him, and so you were stuck in this strange, endless limbo, which you could not escape from nor meaningfully exist in.

“He’s happy,” you said. “He actually brought up choosing a date the other day. I’m the one who’s being weird about it.”

May made a noise of sympathy. “Why?”

You leaned your head against the tinted window, watching the familiar sights of your childhood flashing by, so different and yet still the same. That girl who you had been when you had lived here last…you wondered what she’d think of you now. Was this what she had imagined her life would look like one day?

You didn’t need to ponder it for very long. You knew the answer already — no.

“Why did you say yes when Reo asked you to marry him?” you said instead of responding, thinking back to the day he had proposed to her.

“Because saying yes meant spending the rest of my life with him,” she said.

“And that was something you wanted?” you pressed.

“Of course,” she said. “Even now, my life with him is so wonderful. I want to share as much of myself as I can with him. Isn’t it the same for you? Isn’t that why you said yes? After all, Kira proposed first. If anything, I should be asking you these questions.”

“I guess so,” you said. No. No, of course not. The thought of spending the rest of your life living like this was akin to an imprisonment. It was a great burden weighing down on you, but then again, it was better than the alternative, which was the reason why you still could not bring yourself to leave.

“I’m not judging you or anything,” May said. “And trust me, I could, but I’m not, because I really just want you to be happy. Are you?”

“Am I what?” you said.

“Happy,” she said. “When you were a kid, is this what you dreamt your life would look like?”

You laughed bitterly. “Of course not. People outgrow dreams, May. I was an idealistic girl when I was younger, and there’s no place in this world for that. I have a stable job and a fine home. I have a fiancé who does not mistreat me. I have a cat of my own and a friend who lives only minutes away. Maybe I’m not as happy as I could be, but I’m satisfied.”

“I see,” May said. “If that’s the way it is…I’m glad for you. After everything, you deserve it.”

You exhaled heavily, unsure of what to say. “Thank you.”

Reo and Ryosuke were waiting for you in the front of the mall, and you could not help but take notice of the marked difference between the two of them. Ryosuke was looking around, his lively eyes settling on every girl as they walked past, his posture inviting and casual. On the other hand, Reo was closed off to any approaches, entirely focused on scanning the entryway, craning his neck every time the doors opened in case the next person to walk through would be May.

Unfortunately for him, the people you entered behind were taller than both you and May, so you escaped his notice until the two of you were behind him and May was grinning devilishly. Abruptly, she placed her hands on his shoulders, shaking him back and forth as he shrieked in surprise.

“May!” he said, clutching his heart as he fought for breath. “You scared me. I thought I was being kidnapped.”

“Maybe you are,” she said. “Y/N, I’m holding your best friend for ransom. Give me lots of money and I’ll let him go!”

“No, thanks. You can keep him,” you said.

“Wow, Y/N,” Reo said, pretending to wipe away a tear. “It’s heartwarming how much you care about me.”

“Oh, you guys are here,” Ryosuke said, finally tuning into the conversation. “Took you long enough.”

The joking mood vanished immediately. Suddenly, you were a child again, your mother shaking her head at you in disapproval every time you did something wrong, your father sighing every time you asked him why he was upset, as if you should’ve known just from the way he looked at you what he was feeling.

“We had to make sure you got a taste of waiting, too,” May said before looping her arm through your own. “Though you really had no reason to. You boys can go do whatever, and Y/N and I will go through every single store together!”

“That’s not fair!” Reo said. “I want to help you guys shop.”

“I know, but don’t you think it would be rude to leave Kira on his own? Anyways, this way we can surprise you with what we get,” she said.

“Kira wants to go, though, right?” Reo said, turning to Ryosuke, his eyes wide and pleading. Ryosuke, who had been gazing at a girl as she laughed with her friends, jumped at the mention of his name.

“Huh? Nah, it’s okay. May will make sure she doesn’t buy anything hideous, won’t you, May?” he said. Out of his sight, Reo’s face crumpled, and you thought he genuinely might start sobbing. Reaching out, you patted him on the shoulder comfortingly.

“I would never let her walk around looking ugly,” May said. “Come on, Y/N. Let’s get started — this is a big mall, and we only have so much time before we have to meet back up with everyone for dinner.”

“Bye, guys,” Reo said forlornly, the tendons in his hand flexing, like he was considering reaching out and forcing you to stay back. He must’ve decided against it, though, as he only waved before trudging behind Ryosuke, giving you one last, desperate look over his shoulder before rounding the corner.

Surprisingly, you didn’t buy as much as you thought you might. Without Reo there to insist you and May try on half of every store’s merchandise, you both ended up spending more time making fun of the clothes you saw than anything.

“That sweater is so fucking ugly,” you said, pointing at a strangely posed mannequin. May pretended to gag.

“I think designers have this thing where they purposefully try to design the most horrendous clothes possible, and then, once they genuinely cannot look any worse, they put a brand name and a massive price tag on them and watch people go crazy,” she said. You giggled in agreement.

You had forgotten what it was like to have a friend like this. Your relationship with Chigiri was different — no less important, but different. Being with May was exactly what you needed to calm the turmoil of your mind, and for her part, May was happy to just spend time with you, even if your discussions were more superficial and silly than anything.

The restaurant that Reo had booked a reservation at was in a five-star hotel across town. It was an upscale place, and you spent the entire drive over fidgeting with your clothes, hoping that you were wearing something appropriate for the occasion.

“You look fine, seriously,” May reassured you as you got out of the car.

“Are you sure? I feel underdressed,” you said.

“I’m the same level of dressed as you, so if they’re going to judge you, they’re going to judge me, too,” she said. “We’re in this together. Feel better?”

“A little bit,” you said.

“Good. Excuse me, miss, but we have a reservation for five? Some of our party has arrived already,” she said.

“What’s the name?” the hostess said. She was pretty, with long, smooth hair and innocent features.

“Mikage,” she said. The hostess’s eyes widened, but to her credit, she did not otherwise freak out. Beckoning you to follow after her, she led you to the table where Reo and Ryosuke were sitting.

“Here you are,” she said. “Will the final member of your party be along shortly?”

Reo pinched the bridge of his nose. “He’ll be here at some point. Being on time isn’t exactly his strong suit. Knowing him, he’s probably asleep right now. Say, May, if he ends up being a no-show, does that mean I win the bet?”

May paled. “I’m calling him.”

“That’s cheating! May — May, that’s cheating, stop!” he said as May held her phone to her ear, waving him off.

“I already won the bet, so it’s not cheating if I’m just ensuring my victory remains secure,” she said.

“What are they talking about?” Ryosuke said to you.

“They made a bet about whether Reo’s best man will come to dinner tonight,” you said. “He agreed to earlier, which meant May won, but now he hasn’t shown up, so Reo’s gunning for a comeback victory.”

“Interesting,” Ryosuke said. “Aren’t you glad we’re not so childish?”

You looked at the plush carpet beneath your feet when you answered. “Yes.”

Ryosuke, who was sitting beside you, rubbed your thigh, clicking his tongue as Reo tried to grab May’s phone from her. She barely warded him off with one hand, holding the cell up to her ear with the other.

“Hello? Nagi?” she said. “Mhm, this is May. Yes. Yes, we’re all here. Oh, you’re on your way? Well, sorry, asshole, but you being so late has been more of a hassle for me than answering this call was for you. Okay. Yep. See you soon, I guess. I’ll tell him.”

She hung up with a sly smirk, poking Reo in the cheek. He hung his head in defeat, though of course, he was smiling the entire time, belying his true amusement. They never had any stakes for their bets, and this was on purpose: the competitions were just a silly way for them to liven up how mundane everyday existence could be.

“He was seriously already on his way?” he said.

“Yeah, and he wanted me to tell you to just order the appetizers already. He’s apparently so starved that he might die if he doesn’t eat within the next few minutes,” she said.

“For helping you win the bet instead of me, he deserves it. Traitor,” Reo said, though he waved the waitress over and began listing off the many appetizers he wanted for the table regardless.

“Looks like I’m finally going to get to meet the infamous Nagi,” Ryosuke said, giving the waitress a brilliant grin that forced a blush out of her as she scurried back to the kitchen.

“How do you know him?” you said.

“I’ve heard his name around,” he said. “Once or twice. There was that whole scandal a couple of years ago, too, don’t you remember? When he lost that game and then quit soccer for good?”

There was no way you couldn’t remember. That was the last time you had been back in Japan. You had been in this very town when it had happened, but despite your proximity, you had never found out the reason for it all. You had never understood why he had done it. But, then again, there were so many things about him that you had never understood, so it wasn’t a shock. To you, he would always be an enigma, and one you had no interest in unraveling anymore, to boot.

It was a few minutes later that he walked in. You were dimly aware of Reo high-fiving May in congratulations, never one to be capable of even pretending to stay angry for very long, and also of Ryosuke straightening his back in interest at the newcomer, but none of these things could hold your attention when it was Seishiro Nagi standing in front of you.

He looked almost the same as he had when you saw him last. His pale hair was still kept in the same messy style, though it was soaked for some reason, water dripping down the strands and splashing onto his cheeks. He still wore that same sleepy expression, though something sparked in his dove-colored eyes when they met yours. His shirt was wet, too, the fabric clinging to his muscular body as he draped his jacket over the back of his chair and sat down across from you.

“It was raining,” he said by way of explanation, and though he was speaking to everyone, you could tell he was waiting for your reaction, specifically. You pursed your lips and avoided his heavy stare as best as you could.

“You’re so dumb. Why didn’t you just use an umbrella?” Reo said with a groan, reaching over May’s lap to hand him a napkin.

“Don’t like them,” he said, accepting the napkin and using it to dry off his hair, giving him the frazzled appearance of a mad scientist. “It’s too much work carrying them around.”

You swallowed back the lump in your throat, wanting to say something but finding yourself completely unable to. Thankfully, Ryosuke spoke up, leaning forward with an uncharacteristic interest.

“The falcon of the field,” he said. Nagi’s face was impassive at the mention of his old nickname, from back when he was still one of the top players in the league. “It’s good to finally meet you.”

“Who are you?” Nagi said, pulling out his phone — you were impressed he had lasted so long without it — and began to play a game that, judging by the movement of his fingers, was either Candy Crush or some variant of it.

“Ryosuke Kira.” This earned him a grunt from the clearly uninterested Nagi. “You went to high school with Y/N, right?”

Nagi glanced up at him. “Yeah.”

“I’m her fiancé,” Ryosuke said, wrapping his arm around you in a way that implied possession more than affection. “We got engaged a few years ago.”

“That’s great, man,” Nagi said, returning to his game. “Congratulations.”

“I’m lucky. She’s really the perfect girl,” Ryosuke said.

“Mhm,” Nagi said. His phone vibrated, indicating he had cleared another level. A smile flickered across his face. He was like that, you remembered. Never happier than when he had won a game.

“Ryosuke, stop,” you said. “He doesn’t care.”

“I’m just trying to be friendly,” Ryosuke said. “What about you, Nagi? Anyone special waiting for you back at home?”

Nagi’s phone let out a sad sound. You could picture the screen, the mournful characters and the swirling font, which would read something along the lines of You Ran Out of Moves! He frowned, clicking to restart the level.

“Nope,” he said.

“Wow, that’s a surprise. Well, don’t worry about it. It may seem hopeless now, but the right person will come along when you least expect it!” Ryosuke said.

“Probably not,” Nagi said. “Reo, I’m hungry. How much longer until the food gets here?”

“I’m not sure,” Reo said. “I’ll go speak with the waitress and ask her about the delay.”

“I’ll come with,” May said immediately, springing to her feet and dashing after Reo. You didn’t blame her — if you had a way to escape the awkward situation, you would’ve taken it in a heartbeat.

“Don’t be so pessimistic!” Ryosuke said, in what you were sure he thought was an encouraging tone. “It really does happen like that. Take Y/N, for example.”

“Or don’t,” you said.

“She had never even dated anyone before meeting me,” Ryosuke said. Nagi snorted.

“Really?” he said.

You kicked him under the table, your foot coming into contact with his shin as hard as you could manage. Unfortunately, it had all of the effect that a fly landing on him would’ve, as he only peered over his phone at you for an instant before returning to his game.

“Yup, and now we’re going to get married. All of that is to say we never know what’s going to happen and who we’re going to meet,” Ryosuke said. It was a speech that you might’ve found inspirational, if the circumstances were different. As it was, though, you could only sink down into your chair in embarrassment.

“Sure,” Nagi said. “I’ll keep my eyes open.”

“That’s the spirit. Who can tell? Maybe your future wife is sitting right in front of you!” Ryosuke said.

“Doubt it,” Nagi said. “Considering it’s your fiancée sitting right in front of me at the moment.”

You kicked him again. He blinked at you innocently. You glared at him, begging him to keep his mouth shut. Shrugging his shoulders only slightly, he set his phone to the side as Reo returned with the waitress, who murmured apologies — mostly to Ryosuke — and set your food down in front of you.

“Apparently, they had sent our food to the wrong table,” Reo said. “Go figure. Nagi, you had better not go on your phone while you eat, or else you’ll get bored of chewing and May will have to do the Heimlich on you again.”

Nagi, who had already put his phone face-down on the table, muttered rebelliously to himself but did not pick it up again, as per Reo’s directive. For her part, May inched her chair away from his, obviously not too keen on being volunteered as the resident Heimlich-maneuver-performer.

“Say, Y/N, I’m feeling a little full already,” Ryosuke said, pushing his plate towards you. “And I’m tired from earlier. Do you mind if I go back early?”

“Go ahead,” you said. “Do you want me to come?”

“No, no, I wouldn’t want to take away your time with your friends,” he said. It was then that you realized the hostess who had greeted you had left her station, presumably to change out of her uniform, and your shoulders slumped as you nodded.

“That’s good. I was actually going to ask if I could sleep at May and Reo’s, so it works out,” you said.

“Huh, what?” May said. “I’m alright with it as long as Reo is, but why?”

“For old times’ sake, I guess,” you said. “Although I’m sure just the closet alone at your house is twice the size of our old dorm room.”

“Probably,” she said. “Reo?”

You thought for a second that he might protest, but in fact, Reo actually looked like he might burst into tears of delight.

“Yes!” he said. “Of course — but on the condition that you let me finally talk to her for a bit!”

“Oh, sure,” May said.

“Then it’s a deal,” Reo said.

“That works out,” Ryosuke said, stooping over to press a kiss on your temple. “Now I won’t have to worry about how you get back.”

“Right,” you said, and you were so practiced that the lie came to your lips easily. “I’m glad.”

“I’ll go call the driver for you, Kira,” May said, excusing herself from the table and striding out of the restaurant. A few seconds later, Reo’s phone buzzed. He glanced down at it before groaning.

“Ugh, they keep doing this!” he said.

“What happened?” you said.

“Sometimes, people get it into their heads that just because May is from a different country and isn’t officially married to me yet, they can get away with treating her as less than a Mikage,” Reo said, standing up and pushing his chair in. “If you’ll excuse me, there’s someone I need to fire. Come on, Kira; I’ll just drive you myself. Y/N, Nagi, will you be alright on your own for a bit? I’ll come back with May once we’ve dropped off Kira and she’s calmed down a bit.”

“No,” you said.

“Yes,” Nagi said at the same time, giving you a quizzical look. “It’s alright, Reo.”

“Be civil,” Reo ordered. “I’ll speed a lot, so it won’t be long.”

“See you tomorrow, babe,” Ryosuke said, kissing you again, this time on your lips.

“Ew,” Nagi said.

“Ah, excuse me?” Ryosuke said politely.

“You’re excused,” Nagi said.

“No, that’s not—” Ryosuke looked around for help, but of course none was forthcoming. “Never mind. Um, I’ll just go, then. Reo, do you mind if I stop in the bathroom first?”

“Whatever. I’m going to go check on May and yell at that driver, so meet us there,” Reo said, already storming off. He was so good-natured most of the time that it was easy to forget just how quick to anger he was as well. He had a fearsome temper that he had only recently learnt to control, and on the occasions it reared its head, someone almost always regretted their actions immensely.

As soon as the others were gone, you were unabashedly scowling at Nagi, who did not visibly react.

“Stop it,” you said.

“Stop what?” he said.

“Stop provoking my fiancé,” you said.

“I’m not provoking anyone,” he said, admiring the depths of his drink instead of looking at you. “That would take a lot of effort.”

“You are,” you said. “You keep saying these things that anyone could misinterpret!”

“Misinterpret?” he said. “Uh, you do know what that word means, right?”

“Nagi,” you hissed.

His mouth rearranged itself into a small pout. “The others are gone now. You can just call me Seishiro.”

“I’m being serious,” you said. He let out an aggravated sigh.

“No, you’re just being a hassle. Whatever. Call me Nagi, if that’s what you want. I’m still going to call you Y/N,” he said.

You rolled your eyes. “Whatever.”

“Very original,” he observed.

“Look, I don’t care what you do,” you said. “Just leave me out of it. I’m going to get married soon. I don’t need you acting odd and complicating things the way you always do.”

“I’m not acting odd,” he said. “You’re acting odd.”

“No, I am not!” you said.

“Yeah, you are,” he said. “Also, you suck at kicking. And your fiancé is a pain.”

“Maybe he is,” you said. “But at least he wants me.”

“Is that so?” he said. “I dunno. It looked like he wanted that waitress, too. And that hostess. And May. But I don’t think he’d go after her, because, y’know, Reo would be pretty mad, and he can definitely afford a better lawyer than Kira can if it comes down to it…”

“You don’t know what you’re talking about,” you said.

“Sure,” he said. “Fine. I don’t know anything. You know everything. This is such a pointless conversation.”

“I agree,” you said. “Let’s finish it. I promised Reo I’d get along with you for the sake of the wedding, but please, Nagi, I’m begging you…once it’s over, let’s just go back to being strangers. That’s the best way.”

“This is the first time I’ve seen you since you left,” he said. “You never once messaged me or called me. I thought you would apologize or something once we met again, but you’re not apologizing. You’re saying you want us to be strangers. Do you mean it was on purpose?”

“Of course it was on purpose,” you said. “What good would it have done for me to message you? To call you? It wouldn’t have changed anything.”

“It would’ve,” he said quietly, picking up his phone again. “For me, it would’ve.”

“But I didn’t,” you said.

“You didn’t,” he agreed. He was playing Candy Crush again, but though he seemed entranced by the game, you knew he was listening to you still.

“Look, dwelling on the past doesn’t accomplish anything,” you said. “For better or worse, this is where our lives have led us. This is the culmination of all of our decisions. Okay? Stop pretending like any of it can change. It can’t.”

“Mhm,” he said. “Look. I cleared the level.”

He showed you his phone. Just as you had thought, he was playing Candy Crush, and true to his word, the characters were smiling and dancing on the screen, the congratulatory message written in a sweet, bubbly pink.

You Won!

For some reason, it didn’t feel like either of you had.

taglist (comment/send an ask to be added): @mariyumemi @naatggeo @prettyarsxnist

[synergysilhouette]

My frustration with Asha's writing

A lot of people liked "Wish," and a lot of people didn't, and a particular concern for the latter was the main protagonist. Since I'm in the camp of "I'm frustrated with 'Wish,'" I'll discuss a little bit about why Asha feels like such a letdown.

She's an archetype, but not an individualized character. She screams "Disney heroine," but she doesn't have anything about her that makes her character stand out (positively) among other Disey female leads. She has no flaws that hinder her, and her positive traits are vague at best. "I care too much," is the most generic thing I've ever heard a main character say. In fact, it becomes almost meaningless when a character (who genuinely means it) says it about themselves; caring too much is a statement that works best when talking about someone else. In fact...

2. She has significant plot armor. She gets far in the process of being considered to be Magnifico's apprentice, but it's never said WHY. Considering her friend (or friends? I'm not sure) works in the castle, Dahlia putting in a good word for Asha would make sense to why Magnifico would consider her, and even him asking around town for their opinion of her would make more sense. But it feels like she gets so far in the process simply because she's the main character, despite Magnifico knowing next to nothing about her. And Magnifico has several magical powers at his disposal, but he's still defeated by her (mainly because he only uses his staff against her).

3. She has a lot of influence, but again, it's not really said how or why. During the reprise of "This Wish," the people of Rosas side with her against Magnifico--but this is likely because she's the only one who dared to stand up against him. We only see Asha interact with the people of Rosas during the opening song with her as a tour guide (how did she get THAT job?), and it feels very professional, very timed. It doesn't feel intimate or personal, like Asha has built up a good rapport with the other citizens.

4. Her family is poorly defined. Sabino's wish is to create a song that inspires the next generation, but as Magnifico himself mentions, that's a vague wish--plus imo, it's cheating; rather than working hard and creating a legacy for yourself, you want to wish to give something for people to remember you by. And Sabino is obviously older than Magnifico, but his life--and how he lived it without the kingdom of wishes--is never explored. Perhaps if it was explained that he experienced great hardship and his spirit was broken, it'd explain why he was so fixated on getting a wish. And Sakina's wish is never explained. She's probably the worst-characterized parent in a 21st century Disney movie, since she's pretty much just there. And Asha's father inspired her, but he isn't shown much. I'd have enjoyed it if the plot revolved around her trying to revive her father and it proves Magnifico's point that some wishes can't/shouldn't be granted.

5. She learns NOTHING. Her whole song is about "I've lived a lie" when that's not entirely true; she takes a very black and white view on the situation without ever trying to evolve her viewpoint via Magnifico's perspective, and the people of Rosas never stop to think "we shouldn't be codependent"; they just think "we shouldn't have let Magnifico lie to us." It's a giant avoidance of guilt on everyone's behalf, and since Magnifico is a villain, no one really cares that he has some semblance of a point. When you look at protagonists like Pocahontas, Judy Hopps, and Anna, you see how they learned a new way of looking at things, that they've suffered hardships (either through their own making or otherwise) and that they've grown from it.

6. She's "relateable." Disney's adorkable thing hasn't been too much of an issue for me up to this point; it was unique when Anna did it, and it never feels super cringey with Mirabel and Moana (though if Mirabel is cringey, it fits into the narrative). But now it's tired. I'd enjoy more mature leads like Raya, Tiana, and Elsa, rather than Disney trying to make a protagonist that tries--and fails--to be quirky. And I never really saw Rapunzel as adorkable as her later leading ladies. But Asha tries too hard; honestly that should've been one of her flaws in the film. Her desperation to meet everyone's approval would've been something neat (albeit familiar if we compare her to Mirabel) to explore in the film.

[finniestoncrane]

Play Fight

General!Boomer x GN!Reader, word count: 500 commission: thank you @skye707 for giving me a reason to write for boomer as soon as possible ;-; have some general boomerang play fighting with reader (and i will be using ktjl boomerang as the image because he's yummy) commission me here! request info • prompt list • send me a request • kofi • masterlist minors DNI!! 🔞 cw: suggestive, mentions of arousal, play fighting

Luckily, the exhaustive panting and exertion were enough to offer a cover, an excuse. If asked, he would say his face was bright red due to the workout he was receiving. Not because he was blushing, not because he was facing up to his crush straight on, not because he was deeply aroused and putting effort into hiding it. And grinning wide with his signature hint of mischief was just another attempt to hide the deeper emotions that ran under the surface.

“Dig, you’re doing terribly! I really thought you’d put up a better fight after all your bragging…”

You offered him a sly wink, hoping to rile him up a bit, and succeeding. The moment you tried to shift yourself up to straddle his waist and keep him pinned he seemed to panic, sensing you might gain the upper hand. Grabbing your waist he flipped you onto the soft carpet, kneeling beside you, keeping you there with his strong hands on your wrists. Thankful that you hadn’t noticed the obvious tenting at the front of his pants, he let out a sigh. The way you struggled against him, still smiling, giggling, gave him a feeling in his chest he would struggle to describe as anything other than a life sentence. Playing the field seemed a distant desire. He would keep you pinned there forever if he could, watching you look up at him with playful adoration.

He was desperate not to ruin it, not to taint the moment with his ridiculous and pervasive need to make everything seem like a lewd romp with no emotional attachments. The minute you saw how stiff he had become from pretending to fight you, he knew it would be over. The only solution was to have this over with as soon as possible, despite how much he was enjoying himself.

And again, as though the universe felt it owed someone to Digger Harkness, of all people, his efforts to cover his throbbing attraction with his terrible acting skills were bolstered by the fact that all of his attention was being focused on something he’d never done before: keep someone away from his crotch. Weakened by concentration on other matters, you suddenly had him on his stomach, face pressed into the carpet and telling him to admit you were the better of the two of you.

When you leant down, face almost pressed to his as you smiled, waiting for his declaration of your prowess, he felt that strange sinking and rising feeling again. The one that told him he was in too deep. That it was all over for him. He should be the winner, he should be infuriated that you had won by what was essentially cheating, by being so attractive to him. He should hate you. But he didn’t. Your happiness in victory, the way you helped him up and touched his cheek, making sure he wasn’t actually hurt. That was it. It was scary, it made him panic.

But it was pleasant. It was love.

[xanasaurusrex]

⇢ ˗ˏˋ zeus cabin headcanons ࿐ྂ

a/n: these are my headcanons for the children of zeus! i love thinking about what traits kids of certain gods and goddesses would have, and since zeus is the king of the gods, i thought it would only be fitting to start with zeus! these are less about like powers and stuff like that and more just about how they would be as people!

zeus kids can get kinda crazy

they're always the life of the party, and yet somehow they also shut down the party?

they're just good at knowing when things are getting too out of hand

speaking of knowing things

it's almost as if they have a sixth sense in knowing things, just like general things

oh this person liked this other person

the zeus kids already knew

you cheated on your math test?

yeah, they had a feeling

that kinda stuff

zeus kids also all weirdly have this universal little tic where when they're really bored, they'll rub their hands against something that can create static, and then play with the static in their hands

they can do the thing where they kind of roll it from one finger to another, and then back again

they can also utilize this to shock people, but only ever so slightly

technically they could summon a whole storm and electrocute someone, but very rarely do they have that urge

another thing to mention:

zeus children can hold a grudge

they're masters at being mad at someone for something they did days, weeks, months, or even years in the past that likely they forgot they did

but zeus kids didn't

they never forget

honestly even a bad first impression can really affect your relationship with a child of zeus, because they don't forget things easily

their minds are steel traps

children of zeus are also natural born leaders

this can cause quite the scene when there are multiple zeus kids up for a leadership position because they all fall into a leader role just naturally

a lot of people appreciate this because they're saved from having to lead themselves

but others find this incredibly annoying, and think that zeus kids are all very arrogant and full of themselves

there are some that are like that, thinking they're better because their dad is zeus

but that kind of reaction to being a child of zeus is pretty rare

most of the time it brings them great annoyance because monsters can smell them from farther away, and it makes them much more eligible for dangerous quests, which sometimes is a good thing, but when the mortality rate for a quest that dangerous is usually 0, it can be a little daunting

probably the best trait that children of zeus possess is their loyalty

i understand that this probably doesn't make much sense, considering the fact that zeus was never really known for being very loyal to pretty much anyone in his life

but zeus kids are

this is observed the best during battle, when they would do anything and everything for the people fighting alongside them

they're loyal friends and lovers, too

which, again, doesn't make a lot of sense when looking at who their dad is

but a lot of their lives have been negatively affected by him being disloyal, so a lot of them have a tendency to make sure they're loyal so that they don't end up like him

as amazing as zeus thinks he is, a lot of his kids aren't his biggest fans

in conclusion, zeus kids are pretty cool

they definitely have their flaws

(such as having a tendency to flake last minute when it comes to making plans with other people)

but ultimately they're pretty good people

they're very skilled when it comes to battle, and they're good friends

basically just good people to surround yourself with

a/n: so i won't be doing author's notes at the end of everything, but i just wanted to thank you for reading my very first official post! i'm going to be doing headcanons for the other gods and goddesses, both major and minor, because i just find writing for that kinda stuff really fun! also i really love headcanons (totally not because they're easier to write than full fics, definitely not at all)

anyways, thanks for reading, and be on a lookout for more stuff in the future!

[shaunashipman]

Pardon if you've already discussed this specifically! This has just weighing on my mind again because I keep seeing unjustified points in posts of fans (stans) trying to provide evidence to validate their hate 👀

I get canon vs. fanon. I know we (all) see something happen once or repeatedly and think it has more significance than what it probably does, and it's fun to fantasize. I also understand in fandoms, generally as a whole, we'll (all) be like "ehh yeah let's pretend that didn't just happen!" Like when a character dies or when trying to bleach our brains from seeing something inappropriate. You know, coping with a loss or trying to make the show watchable/toleratable still. Right? My confusion these last 5 months or so is people wanting to use "it's implied" because of personal feelings and not factual reasonings based on the episodes or "I didn't see it so it didn't happen!" to disregard one side but then will use those same points to prove they're right because they're upset about what's canon. Does that make sense? I know they don't care about the hypocrisy, but they can't be serious... personal feelings still don't make it canon 🤨

Strongest example(s) being "whether Tommy apologized" split between "it's repeatedly implied as they all hung out outside of work and had continuous contact throughout the years and they more than likely wouldn't befriend him if he didn't or still acted the same given their standards" against "we never saw him say 'sorry' so he wasn't actually forgiven since... WE didn't see it" leading us to "the 118/fam don't like Tommy because of their facial expressions and how they responded to him." As they said before, if it wasn't aired, it's not canon... unless it fits their agenda. They seem to mix and match and decide what's appropriate for canon to fit their needs. I see them choosing which particular bts, unused promo, or deleted scenes as they please because it's "good" for their ship/character, but turning around and saying the opposite, if it wasn't aired during an episode it didn't happen, if it challenges their desires...

Why is it that they'll use the HenRen/Tommy deleted scene as an "interpretation" of HK questioning or as they say "not approving" of Tommy as something canon because it "proves" whatever they're making up about anti TK/BT, but won't accept and even denied the implication Tommy's "maybe apology" because it wasn't seen? And at the same time, they also want to say Eddie only strictly "emotionally cheated because they didn't air the kiss," but Ramon canonically said "He (Christopher) said he came home and caught you kissing his dead mother" and Eddie said "it's a little true" not in regards to the kissing but to it being "Shannon" but still they'll swear up and down Kim and Eddie NEVER canonically kissed because it wasn't seen?? Like neither was the "shovel talk" so 🤦🏾‍♀️

Dumbfounded... 😅

So let me get this straight. HenRen/Tommy scene wasn't aired, but it's still canon... Kim/Eddie kiss edit version wasn't aired but verbally confirmed during airing also not canon... and Tommy's apology that was not scripted but implied, most definitely, not canon... ???

I know there's no logic, but I can't wrap my head around it no matter how hard I try to comprehend it 😂 I honestly try to not to think negativity about shippers and stans but wow I'm confused lol

so, I'm actually writing a meta right now that touches on a lot of what you're saying, so I'm gonna leave that for now, but I will talk about the deleted kiss

I've said before, I don't consider deleted scenes canon, I call them "schrodinger's canon". we can certainly treat them as canon for fandom stuff and also spec, but if the show contradicts them, it's not a ret-con. so to me, the henren tommy scene is not actually canon. it seems like it was probably just cut for time, so I have no problem with people treating it like canon, so long as they understand that it can be discarded very easily.

so in that vein, the eddiekim kiss isn't canon to me. it was cut, and probably not for time, but because they felt it didn't fit. I don't see ramon's line as contradicting that in any way. the doylist explanation is probably that they intended to have them kiss, as it was filmed, but then decided against it after having already filmed the finale

the watsonian explanation is, chris could very well be embellishing, OR it's that he's a traumatized teenager who walked in on his dad embracing a women who looks like his dead mother. in between seeing that and calling his grandparents, it's very possible his brain distorted it and he really does think they were kissing.

but emotional cheating is still cheating. I wouldn't even put a qualifier on it, it's just cheating. idc that you never kissed, the other woman was clearly under the impression you were in a relationship, however chaste of one, it's cheating. you think if kim hadn't shown up at the firehouse and buck went to talk to eddie, that it wouldn't have ended with them fucking? eddie was fantasizing about sex within a day, they would have fucked and he would have called her shannon, and it would have been gloriously messy, and much better than what we got.

also, I feel like comparing the deleted kiss to the deleted henren tommy scene is uneven. let's talk about the kiss and the potential eddie/tommy pairing. cause either deleted content matters or it doesn't. if them cutting the kiss means it didn't happen and eddie "only" emotionally cheated, then any possibility of eddie/tommy is also irrelevant. cause they got far enough to film the kiss, while eddie/tommy was only talked about, and we don't even know how briefly.

anyway, this is a little disjointed, but I'm gonna go work on that meta that'll hopefully be clearer

[gloomybadger4life]

Full Zutara meta and opinions.

Please no wars in the comments/reblogs. I'm only speaking from what I have read and my knowledge of the show. I'm largely ignoring the comics.

Any fic with Zutara as a mutually loving, long term relationship will obviously not be LoK canon compliant.

These are opinions subject to change as I further read and write stuff.

CW for mental health discussion. Heavy topics. Etc.

General considerations:

Please note I personally do not like cheating in my fics or IRL so I avoid reading and writing it. Some fics include it.

Iroh refusing to take the throne has always made me feel wary. While there are challenges to him taking it at least temporarily, the fact that he puts the whole task on Zuko is not something I take lightly. The show does not have him at the coronation. Arguments can be made about him not wanting to undermine Zuko's political sway, or him being a symbol of the war.

The treatment of Mai and Azula in some fics saddens me. Mai is wrongly depicted as frigid or mean spirited. Best case scenario their break is amicable. Or they never get back together post coronation.

I loathe when Mai is used as a jealous villain who hates Katara.

Aang's decision to spare Ozai is pivotal. I don't believe Aang should have killed him. If he wasn't the last air nomad maybe an argument could be made that he had a moral obligation to do so. Him killing Ozai would break him as a person, making him feel unworthy of his own heritage, more than he already does. As a sidenote: I want to see Aang deal with the fact that he probably indirectly killed many people in the war.

Ozai being alive is a catalyst for conflict and exploring themes of inadequacy and ideological deconstruction. Zuko could stumble by going to him for advice. He could be broken out and then rally followers to oppose Zuko.

Katara's trauma:

She has been parentified to hell and back, and in some ways Sokka has too. Her grief over her mother and the intentional sacrifice she made affects her deeply.

Her sense of justice and drive to help others may stem from wanting to make sure her mother's actions were not wasted.

She spent the whole war running on adrenaline and helping others, being equally strong and nurturing.

She overcame prejudice, sexism, and dealt with abandonment issues with her father leaving for war.

Katara's arc of sparing Yon Rah is more about her realizing she has the strength to overcome and heal. She needed to face her biggest fear and the biggest source of guilt. I believe on some level she always blames herself for her mother's death.

She deals with ptsd, and potentially burnout post war.

Zuko's trauma:

He has been abused and raised to blame himself for it.

Any successes were diminished, and compared to his sister.

If it wasn't for Iroh, who really should have tried harder to stop him from going to the war meeting, Zuko would be actively suicidal.

Overall he deals with massive anxiety, and possibly cptsd.

General Tropes and Themes:

- Aang as possessive or jealous: This is common and I interpret Aang differently. In any case he would be heartbroken about the relationship ending. Post war I see him realizing fully the weight of what rebuilding the air nation would be, that even fathering a ludicrous amount of children would not work per se.

- Katara post finale is largely free to pursue whatever she wants to do. She has no self imposed specific mission like either Aang or Zuko. In a lot of works she takes on the task of rebuilding the SWT, in other works she travels with Aang.

- Zuko is all alone dealing with being the firelord. He has to fend for himself in court, deal with Ozai loyalists, etc.

- Some works make a big deal out of Katara being a virgin and it becomes a major plot point. I don't like this being a whole thing, especially if it feels like it comes from purity culture.

- A central theme of some zutara fics is Zuko feeling a sort of devotion to Katara and striving to be better only for her. This can get unhealthy real quick.

- I dislike jealousy and controlling behavior for personal reasons. (History and Trauma) So I avoid fics with a significant amount of those.

Post Finale fics

- Ambassador Katara: I can see this happening a few years after the finale and even in non zutara fics it's a popular choice.

- Firelady Katara endgame: If it's Katara's choice and she is not being pressured I can see it.

- On the topic of steambabies: While I do see Katara as someone who would want kids, I believe she would not want them for heir and spare reasons. That's one of the biggest challenges for them as a couple if Zuko remains firelord.

On post Southern Raiders fics:

A number of fics have them getting together after this or after the last agni kai.

In my mind, this is not the right time. Their friendship is still being built, and ultimately what makes or breaks Zutara is their friendship. The stronger it is, the more I believe in the relationship.

AUs:

- Arranged marriage AUs are their own can of worms that I do not have the energy to unpack right now.

- No war AUs with no arranged marriage could work but I have nver seen one.

- Modern AUs are hard to generalize. Some are just for smut reasons and therefore concessions are made. Others tell good stories and have enjoyable romance. Using the modern world to explore Katara and Zuko's trauma can be great when done properly.

How the relationship would develop:

Best case scenario for me is six-ish years post finale.

Aang and Katara parted ways some years prior. His tendency to self isolate and the weight of his mission conflicted with Katara's motivation of wanting to help rebuild the southern water tribe.

I do not wish to portray the breakup as toxic, and would rather have them genuinely agree that they need to part ways.

Regarding Zuko and Mai: I believe they would reach an impasse where Mai cannot be the single source of emotional support for Zuko. And Zuko cannot place that task upon her. The two realize that they might have worked out if he was just a prince with no claim to the throne.

Zuko needs to learn to lean on his friends, the problem being they have been away and busy. He has probably exchanged correspondence and is in the process of opening up.

I see both Katara and Sokka being ambassadors, with the latter being more on the road and taking over trade. While Katara focuses on policy and diplomatic relations.

Their friendship grows stronger as they both realize their common flaws: Overworking, neglecting self care, etc.

They find comfort and support in each other and have the kind of 3 am deep conversations you have with lifelong friends.

Katara's perspective and work informs Zuko's beliefs and he goes further into deconstructing what he was taught.

A potential plot point would be Zuko becoming increasingly jaded with the nobility and apparent caste system within the fire nation. Having seen the consequences of imperialism outside and inside the nation.

I also see him wrestling with the idea of how much direct use of authority and or force can be justified in the name of removing nobles who block his more progressive ideas.

Katara would in turn become more aware of the material conditions around the fire nation. Poverty. Unemployment due to demobilization. She would feel the drive to help even if her position stipulated no obligation to do so.

Navigating politics and diplomacy might similarly have her jaded with the current system. She would continue to see the flaws and parallels between monarchies of different countries.

Together they would feel safe to have these discussions and be not-alone in these thoughts.

Somewhere along the line they start hugging more, holding hands, etc.

One of them confesses first, fearing that they might ruin things but not wanting or being able to hide it.

A tentative relationship starts and because they are already having the difficult conversations, talking about what it means to be together is a little easier.

They are not perfect and they will stumble, but thanks to their friendship and trust they will listen to each other.

In an ideal scenario I believe Zuko would work towards any partner being free of the obligation of heirs and marriage.

In all forms they fight side by side and empower each other.

I believe in this scenario:

- Katara keeps and celebrates her culture.

- Zuko grows as a person realistically.

- Mai and Azula find happiness. (With or without partners)

- Aang overcomes the trauma of the war and keeps being an advocate for peace.

- The possibilities for side plots and other pairings are still there.

In (scattered) summary:

I can see why zutara works and why it doesn't. It can be cute and sweet. (And deliciously smutty).

I headcanon both as bisexual.

You can write a serious exploration of what it means to transition from war to peace without leaving the nation in shambles. Or how Katara carries her culture everywhere and wants to share it.

I feel guilty about how positive and optimistic some of this is, while simultaneously feeling equally guilty for the dark and heavy themes for a fic I have not finished yet.

Or you can write them being awful at feelings and almost tearing each other apart. (I don't like this but it is popular.)

Katara's bloodbending is a popular theme and it is its own can of worms.

Thank you for reading!

@wingchunwaterbender @krista-kritical @ikuzeminna

[cryptic--writing]

Uh Dave x reader. Dave wants reader but unfortunately reader is already dating (any member from Metallica) so when reader broke up with (Metallica member) for some reason, he started talking to reader and eventually ended up together. reader is way happier with Dave.

(Kinda basic but I know you’ll make it great 😍)

hihi!!

omg I'm actually posting a very long fic after threatening to quit writing..

also ily Kay this is a good req I LOVE James and Dave dynamic stuff (anything having to do with revenge or jealousy, if youre a writer PLS write some and tag me..) so i loved this req

anywayssss

word count: 4,515 (I think my longest one to date)

warnings: angst, break up, cheating, drinking, fluff, mention of drugs (once), kinda corny, rushed but slow at the same time, way too similar to that one mustainegf fic

A CHANGE, FOR THE BETTER. (1987-1990)

Once again the apartment was cold and empty. It wasn't actually empty; it was filled by James and me. We were on opposite sides of the couch, avoiding each other. IT had been like this for months. We hadn't hugged, kissed, held hands, gone out, anything that normal couples do. He was quiet, which differed from how he was with his friends, including me. Though, this hadn't been different for a while. I've almost gotten used to it, but not emotionally. No matter how hard I try, he seems like he isn't there. The more I thought about it, the more it settled in, the more it hurt. The more I felt I needed to talk about it.

I finally broke the painful and dead silence between us, “What up with you, You've been weird with me for months?” I asked, finally turning my head to face him. He wasn't looking at me, or anything. He was hunched over, his blonde locks blocking the view of his face as he stared at the floor.

James let out a huff in response, shrugging.

This was going to be a long, and very difficult conversation.

James would get like this when there was something on his mind. Something big, but normally it would spill over before this point, he normally would just be like this for a week or two before confessing whatever was hurting him, and I would hold him and comfort him as he cried.

I sighed, moving closer to him, and placing my hand on his back, but he retracted from my touch, something I had gotten used to.

“James, talk to me, please..?” I asked softly, though I was willing to beg to have what we had back.

He just shook his head, adjusting slightly and sitting back, letting me see his stressed and confused expression. “What's bothering you? Tell me, I know that something is wrong..” I tried again, my eyes on his, but his were on the black TV screen.

I tried to move closer to him, my hand on his knee as I tried to get him to even look in my general direction, “James, look at me,” I asked more than commanded.

His eyes wandered in my direction, but landing on the couch cushions under me. It was a start at least. “Can you just say something, please?” I asked again, keeping my tone gentle.

He took a deep, long sigh, mumbling something I couldn't hear, couldn't understand.

Or maybe I did, but I didn't want to.

“What?” I asked, refusing to believe any of this was real as tears stung my eyes.

James just repeated himself, the words falling from his lips like shards of glass.

I shook my head, standing from the couch as the tears began to fall down my face. Knowing of the other woman, I was broken. I was pacing, and he didn't even look at me.

“Are you serious?! Why?! Was I not good enough for you?! We could've talked, we could've worked things out!” I cried, my stomach twisting in a tight and sorrowful knot.

He didn't look like he had any emotions on his face, but I could sense and feel the guilt and pain that clouded him. Every word he spoke only brought more tears to my eyes, each one punctuated with a sharp and sad pain I felt in my heart, eyes, mind, everywhere.

I was trembling as I shook my head, for some reason I refused to believe any of this, or that this was real. I began to waddle towards the kitchen counter, filled with hurt and rage, grabbing my car keys and purse.

“Where are you going?” James asked, his own voice shaky with guilt and regret.

“Away.” I answered harshly, beginning to walk back to the door.

“Please, we can fix this, just.. Just stay with me, ok?” James begged almost, though he wouldnt even stand up to face me, eyeing muy figure from the comfort of the couch. One that held many memories of us.

I shook my head, “No, no, I.. I need to go..” I mumbled, reaching for the door handle and leaving hearing James call out for me as I shut the door, stumbling to my car, getting in and beginning to drive fast and far, no clue where I was headed. It was late at night, probably past ten pm. Tears strung down my face, puddling on the shirt I was wearing, which I realized was James’ shirt. That didn't help, making me sob harder as the faint and musty smell of beer and smoke fumed from his shirt, reminding me of him too much.

After twenty minutes or so of driving, I came past a run down hotel, hearing the soft pitter patter of rain hit the roof of my car, the clouds matching my eyes. I parked, scurrying into the lobby, an older and tired woman at the front desk, noticing the clear sadness that radiated off me.

We had a brief interaction, paying for my room before wandering up to the beat door, the well cleaned room before me.

I stepped in, shutting the door behind me before falling onto the bed, everything hitting me as I began to break down and cry. The man I had once cherished, loved, my everything and world was gone, no longer who I knew. No matter how guilty he felt or regretted it, or how drunk he was, he still did it. It hurt, and it hurt horribly. Someone I poured every ounce of my love and my being into threw me out for some shitty drunken fling with some random slut.

It wasn't long before I cried myself asleep, awaking with a harsh headache, trying to put back together everything that had happened. The words rang in my ears, twisting in me like a punch to the stomach. Instead of sadness, it was just anger and hurt. Tears couldn't come to my eyes, just a cruel, upset feeling I couldn't name.

I laid on that bed for a few hours, the soft hum of electricity filling my ears as I got lost in thought. I had woken up at three pm, and it was now six. I had to get out, do something, talk with someone. Why not go to a bar, get a drink, take the edge off and maybe talk to someone to distract myself.

I went into the bathroom, wiping the black streaks of mascara and other smudged makeup off my face, fixing my hair as much as I could without a brush or any products before checking out and walking back down to my car.

I just drove around, going a bit further out of town on the off chance I may run into James.

Then I saw it, the dark building with a pink neon sign on the outside, not looking too busy on the inside but still a good amount of people. 

I felt I had been here before. Maybe a few years back, maybe a few nights ago.. I wasn't sure, but there was a comforting familiarity as I walked in.

I ordered a drink, sitting at the bar as I picked at my nails, watching the football game on the TV. Not that I cared much for sports, but it was a start for a distraction.

I sat in there for maybe several minutes before my drink was ready, the bartender handing it to me as I began to sip on the bitter liquid, sighing softly as I tried to relax.

I felt a tap on my back, confused and surprised, I turned around.

Then I saw him.

Dave Mustaine, a man I hadn't seen in person for about four years. He was on the rise of the metal world, finally earning his own independent name. Our eyes met, and we instantly recognized each other.

Dave smiled, chuckling to himself, “Where the hell have you been?!” He asked happily, and I forced a smile back.

“I haven't gone anywhere, still been here. Where the hell have you been?” I asked back, hoping this conversation could take me away from this ruin I have been placed in.

He shrugged, “About, just becoming the next big face in the metal scene..” He answered back in a cocky way, as usual.

Seeing him in this bar, made all those old memories flood back. This is where I first met Dave, finally realizing why this place seemed so familiar. James and I had been friends about a year before he formed Metallica, and I remember him asking me to come to this bar with him to go meet his bandmates. I met Lars, Ron, and of course, Dave. 

Dave was still fiery as ever, never changing from his previous self. 

We began to talk, catching up on the years of missed time together, the once strong bond we had slowly reforming.

I remembered the first time I came to one of the band's practices. It was at James’ garage, and Ron and Lars had already left. It was just the three of us, but James was in the house. Dave and I chatted for what felt like hours, and quickly became close and good friends. We had a lot in common, so we got along well.

Then, Dave asked me a question, snapping me out of my thoughts of the past.

“So, how’s things with James? You guys still a couple?” Dave asked, clearly not meaning anything negative, but I felt it.

The question made my stomach twist in a knot, reminding me of the bitter end I had with James last night. I glanced to the floor, my expression shifting from positive to anxious in a way.

Dave quickly took notice of my change in demeanor, his expression softening, “Did.. did something happen? What’s up?” He asked, clearly worried.

I sighed, shrugging. Should I tell him this? Ruin our night together? Force him to feel guilty?

But I didn't want to lie to him either, it would be easier to just rip off the bandaid and move on.

“Uhm, we kinda broke up last night..” I mumbled, staring down at our shoes.

Dave's face was struck with realization, nodding slowly with a solemn expression, “Oh shit, sorry to hear. What happened?” Of course he had to dig deeper. And again, who am I to deny him the truth? He wasn't really one to judge.

“Well.. things had just been rough the last few months.. And then he told me that.. He cheated on me..” I answered with a sigh, feeling a slight weight taken off my shoulders as I acknowledged it, but a fifty pound boulder crashing down on my heart.

Dave looked upset, frustrated even. “I told you that fucker was never any good,” Dave reminded me, which brought me back to the night when James had asked me out.

It was the night of the first Metallica show I got to go to, not having work or anything, and I had to be a supportive best friend. After the show, I went backstage, waiting for the band, when James had ran towards me, grabbing my hands and pulling me into his dressing room, very rushedly confessing to me, which had me smiling wide, as I had felt the same from when we first met, but he had as girlfriend at the time.

It was just us, sharing another happy moment together. No one had known that we were official, but I'm sure someone caught onto his crushing, or mine.

It wasn't just that someone caught on, Dave knew. I told him after a few too many drinks, but of course he remembered that one thing.

After we had come out of that dressing room, I went to go talk with Dave, to tell him that everything seemed to be going perfectly for me at that moment, but then he spoke before I could.

“I don't think you should be around James too much man, he enjoys the life on the road a bit too much, if you get what I mean,”.

It was one of the last things he said to me before he got kicked from the band. After I told him we were dating, we drifted apart, and then he was kicked out.

I hadn't thought of those words until tonight. And it only proved that Dave was right. James did enjoy the drinking, groupies, drugs, all of it. It was only a while until I found out, which I did.

I was snapped back to the present hearing the loud whoops and clapping of other patrons of the bar, who were watching the football game on the TV. I nodded in response to Dave's statement, “I know, you warned me the minute after I started dating him.. Guess you were right..” I admitted, and Dave nodded back.

“It pisses me off, y’know?” He began, “You're too good for that shit, especially from a jerk like him.” Dave added.

I just nodded again, and he kept talking. “I guess he just can never see what he had, always wants ‘better’ but he already has what's best. I mean, he threw me out for that Kirk guy, he's no nowhere as good as me! And I’m sure whoever he slept with is just some whore,” He concluded, and I just nodded again.

“You're right… as always, it seems,” I answered back to him, before my thoughts drowned out the world around me once more.

Dave probably understood this better than anyone, at1 least when it comes to being mistreated and betrayed by James. Someone who he considered a brother, a close friend, kicked him to the curb for someone else. And in similar was me. Someone I considered a lover, and closest friend I had, traded me in for another.

“Do you have a place to stay?” Dave asked, calming after his rant.

“No, not really.. I'm staying at a motel a few miles away,” I answered back, and he thought for a moment before speaking again.

“If you want, you could come stay at my place, I wouldn't mind the extra company, it gets pretty lonely there anyways,” He offered, and my eyes lit up, a small hope in my heart.

“Yeah, that'd be great, thanks,” I said with a small smile, a weight lifted off my shoulders.

“We could leave the bar now and get you set up, it's a one bedroom, I don't mind taking the couch until you've figured something out,” Dave suggested.

I quickly shook my head, “No, don't take the couch, it's your place, I'm the guest! I'll take the couch,” I rebutted.

Dave just nodded, “Exactly, you're the guest, you get the best treatment. Plus, it won't be forever, I'll be fine for a few nights.” Dave still noticed hesitation in my eyes, “I insist.” He added.

I sighed, “Fine, if you insist. But don't hesitate asking me to take the couch once in a while, alright?”

Dave just smiled, “Sure.”

After that, we got in our cars and I followed him to his place, a decent apartment complex in the outskirts of town. We parked and he led me to his door, unlocking it and allowing us in.

“Make yourself at home,” He said, setting down his keys and walking towards the bedroom, and I followed him.

“Hope you don't mind the mess, but it'll do.” My nose was overwhelmed with the strong smell of cigarette smoke and liquor, something he had never been able to get rid of even after not seeing him for four years.

It reminded me of James, which made me feel solemn once more. “Thanks, it's fine, I don't mind, you're already offering me all of this,” I added, sitting down on his unmade bed, which he joined me on.

“You alright? You still seem upset,” He questioned, and I could feel tears pricking at my eyes once more.

“Yeah, I'm fine..” I forced out, my voice choked as I wiped the stray tear from my cheek, avoiding eye contact with him.

Dave noticed, tilting his head slightly as his concern grew, “Hey, look at me, you can talk to me, y’know?”

And just like that, I crumbled. Tears filled my eyes, and they spilled right over as I broke out into sobs, and he just wrapped his arms around me, holding me as iI leaned closer to him, soaking his worn and faded shirt with my tears as he gently comforted me and shushed my cries, wiping my tears with his thumbs when he could.

We stayed like that for what felt like hours, just him holding me and caring for me, but in a way James never could, never did. James was sweet when he wanted to be, but he never held me like this and heard my cries and answered them with comfort.

After a while, I had cried myself to sleep, my cries lessening and silencing as my breathing began to even out, and Dave laid me down gently and got me into bed, wrapping the blankets around me before he headed out for the couch.

That was the night where it began, the rekindling of our once close friendship. Even though we had agreed that this wouldn't be permanent, we had now been living together for a few months, and it felt like we had never been separated, as if we had been friends for the last seven years.

Today, we were planning to go back to that bar, the first time since that night we bumped into each other. We both needed to get out, and Dave was beat and stressed over all the touring with Megadeth, and we could both use a drink.

Dave had been out for a bit today, and I was busy getting ready for tonight since he would be home within the hour. It wasn't a fancy occasion, and I was definitely over-dressing, but I hadn't had any reason to look pretty in forever, getting to wear my favorite black dress, once that complimented my figure and hugged my curves, flowing down to a bit above my knees.

I did my makeup, nothing too glam but noticeable, and for the first time in a long time, I felt beautiful. Even when I thought I had previously when I was with James, he never showed an appreciation or complimented me often.

I shook the thoughts of James out of my head, knowing I had to move on, even though much of myself was still left in that past of what we once were.

I was snapped out of my thoughts as I heard Dave open the door, entering the apartment with a sigh. “Im back,” He called out as I finished clipping on my earrings, walking out to Dave.

“Hey, are you ready to go?” I asked him, seeing his face slightly surprised as he took in my figure.

“Yeah, totally.. You, you look great, by the way..” He answered, still taking in my appearance.

I smiled widely, “Thanks! Let's go then, yeah?”

Dave nodded and we headed out to his car, driving back to that bar, per his choice. The drive was filled with conversation and laughter, as we found that there was rarely a moment of silence between us. His hand rested lightly on my knee, and I didn't think much of it, just a sweet and friendly gesture.

When we arrived at the bar, he offered me a hand and helped me out of the car, walking me in the dim lighted and busy establishment as we searched for somewhere to sit, finding an empty table in the corner, quickly scurrying over there before someone else could snag the spot. 

It was a large table, one meant to seat probably around six people as it was a booth. The leather of the seats were well worn, torn in some places. The table matched, scratched up and old, though it held many memories. 

Dave got up to go order us some drinks, returning soon after and sitting down in front of me. We began to talk, but there was something different, and what I hated most about it is that I couldn't put my finger on it. It wasn't anything negative, but everything felt heavier, like I could feel my heart pounding in my chest for a reason I didn't know.

Dave acted off too, like something was bothering him. He was fidgety, his eyes avoiding mine but at the same holding long term eye contact. What was going on with him?

I tried to not think about it as I was probably over analyzing the whole situation. I took a sip of my drink, and for once, there was a lasting silence between us.

I didn't know what to say. The bar wasn't my idea, it was something Dave had planned on a few days ago, and he seemed excited at the time. “Everything ok? You just seem all.. Jittery.” I commented, snapping Dave out of whatever haze of thoughts he was in.

“Yeah, totally,” He muttered, which only grew my curiosity, and sparked a new worry.

Was he on drugs? Well, I knew he was, but was he on too much?

“You're not… on anything right now?” I mumbled out in a question and he shook his head.

“No no, it's not that, I swear.” Dave reassured me, and I had to take his word for it.

Dave tapped his fingers on the table a few times as he thought before speaking up.

“You uh, you remember anything in specific about this place?” Dave asked me out of the blue.

“Uhm,” I paused to think, “Yeah, isn't this where you picked me up a few months ago?”

“Well, yeah, but anything else? Think as far back as you can,” Dave instructed me, and I tried to think.

Until it hit me.

“Oh! Yeah! Isn't this where James took me to meet the rest of the band? We even sat at this booth, right?” I finally remembered, and the memories flooded back as clear as day.

Dave hasn't changed much since then, but I do remember how he was when we very first interacted. He was crazy and animalistic, yeah, but he seemed shy around me, until he had a few beers, and then he was way less tense and boxed up. That was the beginning of our friendship.

“Yeah, I think about that a lot,” Dave informed me, and I nodded.

Dave still seemed off, like he was hiding something from me.

“Dave, what's on your mind? Like actually, something is clearly bothering you,” I was growing impatient with his vague answers, I wanted to know the truth.

Dave sighed, thinking for a moment before speaking, “Well, you remember that night, tha=e first Metallica concert you attended, when I warned you about James, even though you two were already together,” and I nodded.

“Well, when he told you in that dressing room, I overheard it all. I was uhm.. Looking for you too. I got pissed that James had got to say something before I did, and uhm.. I had like.. The fattest crush on you when we first met.. And now that we've grown close again, I think I feel the same wa-” Dave was cut off as I kissed him on the lips, all of our unspoken feelings coming out for each other.

After I pulled away I moved some of his long ginger hair out of his face, gently caressing his cheek as I smiled softly at him.

“I've felt the same since we met too.”

Another influential night, all in this bar. The three times I've come here, three big things happen, always having to do with Dave.

That night was about three years ago now, and Dave and I have been together happily for those three years, now engaged and happier than ever. With the success of MEgadeth's latest album, ‘Rust in peace’, things have been going great for us. He showed me what real love felt like, to be cared for and cherished, all without getting judged.

I had gone to multiple shows with Dave at this point, and this was just another one. They were one of the headliners for a weekend-long festival, and I was more than thrilled to support my fiance.

I listened to loud chords of ‘Holy wars’ as the band began to finish their set, with me sitting backstage. I was at a table, my left hand that wore my gorgeous engagement ring was digging in my purse, until I heard familiar steps behind me.

And then a voice.

“Are you..” I cut them off.

“James? What are you-” I was now in turn cut off by him.

“I'm playing a show. What are you doing here?” The frontman asked me. I was so shocked to have seen him, personally, that is. I knew Metallica would be having a show here, but it wasn't until the next night.

As if the timing was perfect, after James questioned me, Megadeth had come off stage, Dave rushing towards me. “Hey baby, did you like the show?” He asked, leaning down to kiss the top of my head.

“Yeah, it was great..” I answered, still dumbfounded. James looked even more dumbfounded than I did.

Dave looked up, curious at the silence, “What's wro-” He cut himself off, his eyes meeting James.

Daves lips curled into a smirk, knowing now he has the best form of revenge for kicking him out all those years ago. That revenge was me.

“Nice seeing you, James. What's going on with you and my fiance?” Dave bit back a cruel snicker, watching as James just grew more and more confused.

“Oh.. I was just, uhm, saying hi,” James answered, trying to process everything.

I was avoiding James' eyes. How would I explain that after I broke up with him, I met up with his ex bandmate, moved in with him after remeeting, dated after a few months, and engaged after three years.

“Uh-huh… You guys know each other, yeah?” Dave teased, knowing the answer, just wanting to get a rise out of James.

James didn't want to give Dave anymore attention, just nodding.

“Gotta thank you a bit man, I doubt we would have ran into each other again if it wasn't for you being a prick like always,” Dave said bitterly, enjoying this game of shame on James.

James looked slightly guilty, just trying to ignore him.

Dave looked back to me, “Well, I need to go clean up a bit, you can find me if someones bothering ya, sweetheart,” he said to me sweetly, my eyes meeting his before he kissed my cheek and walked away.

James just stared at me for a moment before walking off in another direction, the rest of Metallica showing up finally, Lars leading the three of them, his eyes landing on me.

This was  going to be a long, long weekend.

[fracturediron]

Something I do like about the character writing for DFF is that 1) The characters really do feel like messy teenagers 2) The characters do shitty things, hurt each other or do harmful things to themselves that - frustrating and painful as it is to watch - make sense for the character and their circumstances. The characters don't often make the smart or best decision, but for the most part, it makes sense in context.

Tw for discussion of sexual abuse

Like am I mentally yelling at Non to forget about the movie, ditch these shitty 'friends', be honest with Phee, report Kru Keng and to move to Phee's school? Yes, I am. Do I understand why he doesn't do any of those things? Yes, I do.

He's a teenager who's mentally ill, isolated, with low self esteem and coming from a place of poverty.

As a kid, I was also part of a group of 'friends' who were actually bullies. Although things never went nearly as far as they do in DFF, I can get where Non's coming from. When you're that desperate for acceptance and to be a part of a group (however shitty it may be), and when perhaps they're not even always shitty, just enough so to make you consider staying around, you'll stay around in the hope things get better.

Non's family are poor - to the point of taking out loans for New - and he's already brought trouble to their door due to the money laundering scheme, as well as to his parents' relationship. In contrast to New - who's implied to be the golden child - Non likely feels like he's brought nothing but trouble and misery to his family.

As someone who's mentally ill and on medication, I wouldn't be surprised if he felt ashamed of his mental illness as well, and felt like that already made him a 'burden' to his family. Disclaimer that I don't know how mental illness is treated in Thailand specifically, but as someone from an East/Southeast Asian background, I do feel like in general, mental illness is something that still has a more of a stigma to it in Asia than it does in the West (not that there isn't stigma here too). Like, I would never tell my mum I'm in therapy because I feel like she wouldn't truly understand, and might even blame herself for me going. From her point of view, only 'crazy' people, someone with something seriously wrong with them or someone suffering from severely traumatic event would go to therapy.

When Non got taken in by the police, Phee talked to his dad to get him released, putting himself in potential trouble with his dad and potential future trouble with the police if this comes under any further scrutiny.

Non says time and time again he doesn't want to be a burden to anyone, and he already feels like he's been a burden to his family and Phee. He knows his family can't afford the debt, and he doesn't want to trouble Phee further. So when Kru Keng offers him money in exchange for sex, even though he knows what Kru Keng's doing is wrong, even though he doesn't want to lie and 'cheat' on Phee (and don't tell me it's 'cheating'; again, this is an adult in a position of power grooming a vulnerable youngster), he believes he'd be bringing his troubles to his loved ones and doesn't want to be even more of a 'burden.' So he has sex with Kru Keng.

And then Phee's reaction to finding out. Does he react badly and then say something really awful to Non by telling him to get lost and die? Yes. Do I understand why he reacted like that? Yes! Again, he's a teenager, and probably one in his first serious relationship, and reacting out of anger and hurt, without full details of the situation or understanding of why what Kru Keng's doing is incredibly wrong (even if Non seems to be 'consenting').

Unfortunately, in cases of real life teacher-student grooming, it's not uncommon for the reaction of students (especially teenagers) to not be one of 'oh, that's fucked up, the teacher's a monster, poor student [x]' but for the victim to be ridiculed or slut-shamed by some quarters, especially if it's seen as 'consensual.'

Jin's reaction too. Is it shitty he videoed Non and then (almost?) posted it on social media? Yes. Is it because of him taking that video that it somehow got disseminated to the rest of the school? Yes. Do I understand why he reacted this way? Yes. People are messy and human, and doesn't always react in the best ways in the face of hurt, anger and immaturity