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boizandgurlzinthehouse · 1 year

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𝐌𝐄𝐒𝐒𝐄𝐃 𝐖𝐈𝐓𝐇 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐖𝐑𝐎𝐍𝐆 𝐁*𝐓𝐂𝐇 ; 𝐆𝐔𝐍-𝐖𝐎𝐎 𝐗 𝐅𝐄𝐌!𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐄𝐑

𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐓 𝐈𝐈𝐈. 𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐓𝐓𝐘 𝐃𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐊𝐒, 𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐓𝐓𝐘 𝐉𝐎𝐁𝐒, 𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐓𝐓𝐘 𝐒𝐈𝐓𝐔𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐒.

summary: y/n tries to blend into the group, meanwhile it’s harder then she thought. on the other hand, memories are getting back to her.

wordcount: 3.328k

tw: swearing, y/n is a little bit bitchy (again but not that pick-me style), finally some action, flashbacks about parents (i won’t tell you what’s my purpose with this hahahahah), crime. some heartwarming fluff (i won’t spoiler, read it girlie)

author's note: it’s half 1am, edited this on phone. sorry for not writing, i had a job interview, yaaay!!

part 1 part 2 playlist!!

“so, what do you think about hyeon-ju and the plan?” woo-jin asked as they sat at the table.

“she seems cool. but a little bit antsy. i’m not familiar with personal questions at job interviews.”

“why, what were your interview questions?” woo-jin asked, as gun-woo handled the meat.

y/n snickered.

“my boss just looked at my cv, i had enough experience. i’m working at a bar, i’m a so-called little boss. nevertheless, my wage does not show this” y/n huffed a little, getting a message. looking at it, she chuckled. “oh, speak of the devil, it's him! asshole.” she murmured as she put away the phone.

“won’t you gonna answer it?” gun-woo asked. y/n shook her head.

“no, he probably bothered me with some easy-peasy tasks. i swear if i wouldn’t be there, he couldn't even sign or read a paper about procurements!”

“at a bar? what is the name?” woo-jin asked.

“pink panda. close to the station, but not too close for drunk people to get home.” y/n replied. gun-woo’s chest tightened a little bit; if woo-jin and y/n get to talk about this, he’s gonna feel… like an outsider.

“i know that place! me and my friends got to drink there a lot, but i never saw you.”

“probably you were just too drunk.”

at y/n’s words, the three laughed. “working in a bar is cool, even if we close at 10pm because of covid. a lot of people came and went from where i work because the management didn’t have the money to pay them. only mine and some co-workers’ salaries haven't been shortened; everybody else's has varied through time.”

“that’s shit… i used to teach gym classes to kindergartners at my friend’s school, a gym teacher of some sort. but since then it was shut, i’ve been a bit of a bind.”

“well, don’t worry about it,” said y/n, as she chewed on the meat that gun-woo served them. “that probably didn't suit you anyway.”

“you think so too?” gun-woo laughed. y/n smiled and nodded.

“you two can go and damn yourselves, kids fucking love me!” woo-jin protested. “but i suppose, with drunk people it’s a little bit more difficult.”

“don’t even begin, please,” y/n shrugged, “i can handle them. lot of people try to suffocate their depression and unsuccessfulness into alcohol, but only the bartenders see how broken they are. probably, you wouldn’t sober in a bar, especially at night, that’s why you don’t care about other people, but workers, like me can see everything. i have had to gain a lot of nerves ever since i started working at pink panda. with covid, happy parties and celebrations started to decrease, and more and more working, depressed men and women had come to us. i couldn’t think that i’d have a sore heart anytime when it comes to closing time. shit, some people’s state is seriously a cause of concern.”

“that’s really depressing. see, now you made a bad vibe! how can i happily eat this meat if you say these kinds of things? aish, y/n, i just wanted to ask if you can make some good drinks, and now we are here, like in some death row.” woo-jin tsked, y/n furrowed her eyebrows.

“oh, well, then sorry to tell you that! i can’t recommend these people to go to a psychiatrist anyway.” she murmured.

“why not?” gun-woo asked, and then y/n looked at him through the fog of the frying pan.

“because i have to work somewhere too, and i’m too dumb for a major in psychology.”

the three laughed.

“true, true. now then y/n, what kind of drinks can you make?” woo-jin asked, tucking some kim-chi in his mouth.

“anything you want. why, you want to get drunk?”

“no, i’m just saying that if our mission goes well, maybe you could practice with us. i like cocktails with whiskey, and tequila!” woo-jin suggested.

“whiskey? you seem like a vodka-type of guy.” y/n responded. gun-woo listened to the two, and somehow felt ashamed for not drinking as his best friend.

“and what do you think, what do gun-woo drinks?” woo-jin asked, nudging gun-woo with his shoulder. y/n tilted her head, like she was guessing. gun-woo hoped the blush didn’t creep up to his cheeks, like he felt the embarrassment filled his veins.

“i don’t know… maybe he doesn't drink? he doesn’t have sunken eyes like you.”

“sunken eyes? i do not have sunken eyes!” woo-jin huffed. “and what do you drink, y/n?”

“maybe it’s gonna surprise you, but i don’t drink that often. i have to say that i only drink on special occasions. but, a good gin or some fine cocktails are always a prize for my liver. seeing other people’s misery everyday, somehow takes away the mood from alcohol.”

gun-woo tried not to let the flashbacks kick in, as he thought about his dad. he imagined, what if y/n still serves his father in pink panda but she doesn’t know that it’s his father.

“if i could make a decent cocktail, i’d make drinks everyday. everytime! when i was in the marine, me and my comrades had to drink shit soju or whiskey, or rum with cola. it was terrible!” woo-jin shivered, probably from the memory of the taste of it.

“cola and rum could be cuba libre, but judging by the marine, i would say that yeah, it was really just some shitty alcohol-juice. talking about marine, gun-woo, are you an ex-marine too?”

woo-jin grinned, clinging to gun-woo. “believe it or not, but gun-woo was the best part of the marine! he was elite! scouts! cool, huh?”

y/n smiled, looking at gun-woo.

“didn’t know you were this cool.”

if gun-woo’s heart wasn't already beating fast in his chest, y/n’s words and the confident smile on her lips guaranteed to cause him an almost-tachycardia. how could she be so cool and so cute at the same time?

“i… i don’t like to boast about it. being a marine gave me such good things as patience, tolerance, and stamina. maybe that’s how i could begin boxing, without these things, i could have maybe given up.” gun-woo said shyly, y/n clinked her chopsticks with his.

“if you have nothing else, you can say these things with confidence, you know? my father was also a scout at the marine, and he wa… is the best man i’ve ever knew. look at me, i don’t even have any experience from the military, i’m only a girl who works in a shitty bar with shitty people.”

“but you can mix cool drinks! cocktails!” woo-jin protested, making y/n shrug her shoulders.

“and you can fight in many martial arts!” gun-woo added. “can is ask… something personal?”

y/n leaned back, furrowing her eyebrows in a funny way, but her expression was calm and absentminded.

“we aren’t at the interview now. and you two seem to peel every skin off of me. so, go on! ask me.”

gun-woo curled his fingers a little bit.

“why do you know this much about martial arts? i don’t want to insult you, but girls your age… aren’t so interested in these. did something happen… or…” he didn’t know how to continue it. y/n nodded, pushing away the plate from herself a little bit, like if she needed some place.

“it’s a family tradition. before yeongsan, we also lived in the outskirts of seoul. some places are really dangerous, we lived in a building estate, but crime like rape and theft was common everyday. my father knew that if i don’t learn how to look out for myself, i can be a victim easily. in the beginning, i hated training and boxing, and that my father beat me up with the sons of his friends. i hated running in the morning, i hated doing push-ups and practicing the movements… but after that, when i was like eight or nine, i don’t remember, my mother got harassed when was coming home at night. seeing her sad, crying and sitting with her at the police station… broke something in me. “y/n snuggled in her seat, looking down at the plate. “i hated the place we were living at, i hated every person on the street, i saw everyone of them as the attacker of my mother. i used that hate to gain my strength, everyday. i ran everyday to get away from the men who wanted to harass me, i fought the guys in my father’s gym to beat the guys who picked on me at school. and i… i made a promise every day.”

“promise of what?” woo-jin’s voice was like an axe that broke the ice. y/n looked up at him.

“that nobody can beat me. that i’ll fight, cut or run out from every dangerous situation. and everybody that hurts my family or my loved ones, that means that they hurt me.” y/n answered.

“you are so brave”, gun-woo said, from instinct. it didn't matter if the girl’s mother, sister, friend or whoever got hurt… it mattered that they had the same cause to get strong. to protect. and those people who train and fight for other people’s protection, that meant that they never used it for bad.

“what? i’m not!” the girl shook her head. “i’m just strong. it’s really bad to say, but if mother doesn’t get harassed… maybe i never learn that there’s actual danger in the world. or i learn, but too late, when i can't do anything about it.” y/n protested.

“you are cool, y/n. i mean, you dont look like you could beat a guy. or, in other meaning, any guy.” woo-jin added, getting her huffing.

“just because i don’t have big muscles like you, that doesn’t mean i can’t beat others! okay, people who are built like mountains are the exception, but i still can run.”

gun-woo thought about in-beom, and how the man beat him, even if gun-woo was really strong. he imagined that what if y/n was in front of in-beom… only thinking about made his stomach churn. he’ll never let y/n meet in-beom, and never will let him hurt her.

“did you run from situations?”

“sure. i don’t fight if it’s already hopeless. but it was only two or three times, when i was little. it’s also important to measure your chances and possibilities if you don’t want to die.”

“wise words. but now, let’s eat!” woo-jin ended the conversation by getting a bite from the meat.

after lunch, the three were getting back to the bookstore. gun-woo walked beside y/n.

“you were right, when you said that thing about chances, and possibilities. maybe… i should have run too, or gotten myself and my mother safe.”

“i think if you ran from smile capital, they could have found you again, and again. i don’t know if you did the right thing, but let’s say that you didn't have any other choice. and if someone's life is at stake, then… you feel that you gotta give in everything, if their life matters to you.” y/n replied.

“did you… find your mother’s aggressors?” gun-woo asked. y/n looked at him, nodding.

“yeah. i… i wanted to kill them. my own desire to kill scared me too, i was only twelve! but in the end, i thought i couldn't bear the weight of killing three people. i rather beat them up, and called the police that they tried to assault me. i told the policemen that it was self-defense, when it came to their wounds. i guess they’re still in prison, but i’m not sure if i could recognize them again.”

“did you hurt other people too? for vengeance?” gun-woo asked, the girl shook her head.

“not that hard. just frightened away some boys who disturbed me in school. after school, i never wanted to go to university. i don't have instagram or any social platform, i don’t want other people to see my face on the internet. even that’s a miracle that you found me.”

“you father is sir choi’s friend. i think that sir choi thought about you. did something happen to your father?” at gun-woo’s question, y/n shook her head, stopped walking.

“can you… just please, don’t fuss about my father? i know that you don’t ask me because you want to tease me, but…” y/n stepped closer to gun-woo, looking into his eyes. gun-woo didn't see tears, but something much more frightening: sadness, the type of sadness that washes over any other feeling. suffering from memories, from something that you can’t change. her lips tightened, like she tried to keep something inside, eyebrows furrowing, but in the painful way. “...it’s more horrible than you can imagine. everytime i want to talk about it, it’s… like i see everything in front of myself again.”

gun-woo nodded, his expression hardened.

“did the president of smile capital do that?”

for a couple of seconds, y/n’s face was still. she wasn’t even blinking, but then, a nod, soft as a breath came from her. gun-woo patted her shoulder, looked into y/n’s eyes again. they were shining from something he couldn't name. she focused on every word that came out from his mouth.

“we’ll catch yang jae-myeong tonight. you don’t have to worry about those memories anymore.”

[ 𝐓𝐈𝐌𝐄𝐒𝐊𝐈𝐏 ]

the sky was dark as hyeon-ju’s car rode through the empty streets of seoul. they followed the car that supposedly drove yang jae-myeong and his gang to steal IDs in the dark of the night. y/n tried to follow the car with her eyes, but hyeon-ju then threw a cap to her to cover her hair, the mask was already covering the lower side of her face. woo-jin and gun-woo sat in the back, y/n on the passenger's seat beside hyeon-ju.

“so you know the plan, right?” hyeon-ju asked, as y/n tried to tuck all her hair under the cap. it was impossible, she had longer hair and the cap would slide off with every slight movement.

“do i really need to wear this shit?” she whimpered as she looked constantly in the little picture of the rear-view mirror. hyeon-ju didn’t even look at her as she kept driving.

“you have unusual hair, y/n. what do you think, would it be ten or fifteen minutes to find you on the streets? smile capital has people everywhere!”

“okay, chill. geez…” the other girl murmured, in the little mirror, she saw gun-woo’s eyes. y/n made an ‘is hyeon-ju seriously this crazy and antsy?’-look. gun-woo snickered, his eyes crinkled and y/n knew he wanted to laugh.

hyeon-ju suddenly stopped; woo-jin almost knocked his head into the seat in front of him.

“ow! are we here?” he asked, hyeon-ju turned back.

“get out. and don’t fuck up the plan, remember?”

“yes!” the three answered in a choir, climbing out from the car. y/n pulled her jacket over her body tighter, in the middle of the night, it was colder than a couple hours earlier. but it was january, so she didn’t complain. in the outskirts of the city where she lived before she had to move on, winters were more cruel. her mother always filled the heating pad she used for menstrual cramps, took it under the blankets so y/n didn’t freeze at night –but several times, when her father didn’t come home, only at sunrise, she slept with her mother. although the cold was almost breaking her bones, she found a calmness that she couldn’t find anywhere else. not in the warmest room, not when she was sitting in her bathtub on her own rent.

“there he is” woo-jin muttered, shaking y/n out of her memories. it’s no time for reverie, it’s time for action. they sneaked down on the stairs where the gang was going down, as quiet as they could. gun-woo looked at y/n, nodding reassuringly. y/n nodded back, trying to hear what they said, but they were too far to get to know anything.

“we need to go closer” y/n whispered to gun-woo, who nodded.

“i know.” he answered. “maybe we…” but then, woo-jin ran forward, hiding behind another pillar under the arcades. gun-woo tried to sing to him, but the other was singing constantly, “stop singing to me! we’re gonna get caught!”. woo-jin accidentally knocked down a box. the thud was so silent, and yet so loud. y/n didn't have to see that yang jae-myeong and his gang suspected something.

“oi, is there someone?” the air froze. y/n’s heartbeat began to overcome her breath, she looked at gun-woo. they communicated with their eyes.

we're gonna get caught. we fucked up!

don’t worry.

they heard footsteps. y/n closed her eyes, the leap seconds seemed to be hours, and the footsteps were like ticking bombs. she tried to disappear just thinking about it, but opened her eyes when she felt something… something with her hand. it was warm, and had a little grip on it, but so gentle that only the warmness was constant. y/n slowly looked down.

gun-woo held her hand in his. y/n barely held hands with anyone she knew, but with him, it was so natural. like he always used to touch her. she didn’t try to shake it down, maybe it was from the adrenaline, but more because of the comfort. it somehow calmed her down, but only for a second, when she heard footsteps again. she didn’t knew how far the bad guys were, and it confused and frightened her. he didn’t see yang jae-myeong ever, was he a mountain? or the best fighter in the town? he surely had a knife, she could handle it, but his gang… were they not enough for them? all these questions got the worst out from her. that’s it, we’re fucked.

no, we’re not.

gun-woo slowly lifted up his other arm, putting his pointing finger in front of his mouth, be quiet. y/n nodded, but when the footsteps were like the closest, she waited for that yang jae-myeong guy to pop up beside gun-woo’s head. now she was the one who held a tight grip on gun-woo’s hand. she didn’t dare to close her eyes. she could almost hear gun-woo’s breath and heartbeat.

“come on man, there’s nobody! you’re just drunk, fucker.” another guy said. y/n tried not to breathe out so loudly. the footsteps faded, y/n tried to count it. by ten footsteps, maybe they were distant enough and had turned down in the arcades. woo.jin looked at them, y/n bend over gun-woo, giving him a ‘i’ll blind you with your own fingers’-look. gun-woo, slower than a sloth, began to peek out. he turned back as fast as lightning, giving y/n a little heart attack again. he nodded. it’s clear.

y/n nodded back. then, go!

sneaking on the only possible way down, they heard as yang jae-myeong began to bewitch his next victim. he got the homeless man, got his ID. y/n’s anger boiled, but he couldn’t do anything. they sacrificed the smaller bad on the altair of the bigger good. it reminded her of when her mother played ‘what do you see? i see a…’ game with her, to get her away from thieves and homeless people.

yang jae-myeong wasn’t that lucky with the second one. as much as y/n could hear, he stole the ID from him. idiot, how could he not remember? he only had one job! y/n rolled her eyes, but when gun-woo shook her shoulder, she looked there. they were beating the guy.

“what the fuck?” she whispered to woo-jin, who catched gun-woo’s arms.

“gun-woo, you can’t be involved!” he tried to stop him. with every thumping and clanking sound, bones and body parts were clashing to the ground, gun-woo looked at y/n. please, stand by my side. please reassure me that it’s okay to fuck up a plan and saving a man from dying. please, let me do the right thing.

y/n huffed.

“we don’t have time to negotiate on this. i don’t give a crap about this plan if we let an innocent person die.” she said, didn’t even finish the sentence and gun-woo began to attack. he easily knocked down the two of them, leaving only yang jae-myeong standing.

“who the fuck are you?” the guy yelled, y/n looked at him. he didn’t even look like a criminal; he seemed like a normal guy. or an asshole. okay, more like an asshole. gun-woo hesitated, this was yang jae-meong’s moment to attack as he flipped out his butterfly knife. the moment of shine didn’t come though; as y/n saw the sharp object directed at her friend, she kicked out from his hand. “and who the fuck are you?”

y/n didn’t say anything, only standing undo a fight position; she didn’t even know if it was krav maga, systema or muay thai —it was her instinct.

seeing the overpower, yang jae-myeong decided to run away without his gang. loser; they’re just doing this together for money. y/n was proud of herself; how fast did she make deductions! surely it was the adrenaline.

as the bad guys ran away, gun-woo crouched down to the man, touching its head —it was swimming in blood. if he wasn’t dead already… he could be just in ten minutes.

“call the ambulance” y/n said. woo-jin was freaking out at the time.

“hyeon-ju is going to kill us” he said, with his phone in his hand. the girl stepped in front of him.

“no, she won’t. call her, tell this, otherwise she’s gonna find it out and she or we all gonna get in trouble later.”

“but—“

“no buts! it’s our only choice.” y/n didn’t know why, but she added a “if she’s yelling really loud, give it to me.”

“why? you are freaked out too! you wanted to kill me!”

“you knocked down a damn box, geez! just call her! tell her what we did. and try to calm her.”

“thanks for the impossible task” he murmured, as he searched for the girl’s contact.

tooking off her cap and mask, y/n felt a little bit relieved as she could breath fresh air after the stale one under her mask. crouching down to look at the men, checking his pulse, she looked at the neon signs. her chest felt sore, and this whole situation was so screwed.

looking at gun-woo as he talked to the ambulance on the phone, for a couple of moments she just stared in front of her.

according to the minutes when yang jae-my ring was just assuming that someone was following them…

…now they were truly fucked.

𝐓𝐎 𝐁𝐄 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐔𝐄𝐃.

author's note: m tired )): but we reached more than 140 notes on the first part, u are all so awesome!! i love y’all 🥺🥺🎀🍵🩷✨🩰 that’s why it’s worth it to stay up late at night and finish this <3

taglist: @fairyhani @castleninja @littlebaby-bunbun

(ask for tag in taglist in comment or here)

#bloodhounds kdrama #bloodhounds netflix #bloodhounds imagines #bloodhounds x reader #bloodhounds #gun woo x reader #gun woo imagines #woo jin x reader

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animalinvestigator · 2 months

Note

any manga recommendations?

yessss oh my gosh always, gladly. so honored you would ask little ol me about such a thing... i haven't been reading much lately so here's just a little list of things ive picked up in the past few months or things i've liked for a long time..... all of them are on mangadex so just look em up... Im editing this to put them under the cut sorry i didn't do it before ive been on the clock for like 4 hours and im tired Lights cigarette

fool night yasuda kasumi !!! it's currently ongoing and i recently got caught up... if i had to describe it in two words.. "post-chainsawman." it's very similar in a lot of ways, but has very different priorities.. what i really like about it is that it has kind of a tighter focus on the "poverty and capitalism" angle that chainsawman definitely covers but doesn't really devote its full attention to. in a world where the sun no longer shines, plants can't grow, so humans are constantly at a deficit of oxygen... to combat this, government facilities offer a payout to desperate people who can't afford to live if they allow themselves to be "transflorated" -- basically fed on by a magical spiritual plant that will eventually kill them and release oxygen in their stead. one such desperate person undergoes the procedure only to find he has the special ability to communicate with transflorated bodies after theyve passed... and then he becomes a Plants Detective and shenanigans ensue. Super good it made me cry... art is beautiful..... definitely worth a read if youre looking to pick up something ongoing

babel no toshokan by tsubana - stumbled upon this after reading the artist's other work "wakusei closet" on a whim... this shorter story is much preferred and has engraved itself deeply on my heart. a girl with a strange set of beliefs about reality enters a strange relationship with a boy who can read everything that's ever been written just by touching an identical sheath of paper..... seriously so good. give it a go if you want something short and sweet

planet laika & scorched earth of love by mayuri yoshida, this is a short manga and one shot bundled with it that has been one of my favorites for like FOUR YEARS NOW!!! mayuri yoshida's sickly cute animal people + loving intricate lineart combine to create a really unique visual aesthetic. its about the titular laika , as in, the dog launched into space, who has since become the ruler of a planet of dogs, and her plot to take revenge on humanity. also she has a lesbian wife. the one shot is so good too SO DONT MISS IT!!!

anyone who has heard me talk about comics for the past year or so probably knows i've been trying to get Just yknow everybody on earth to read dead dead demon's dedededestruction by inio asano. nothing i could ever possibly say about it could do it justice it's seriously my favorite manga of all time. it's about being in love with your best friend and the end of the world and aliens and politics and the internet and stuff. asano's art is truly breathtaking and unlike anything else on earth, the characters are all infectiously lovable, and it's just like... endlessly life affirming and heals my heart in a way i have a hard time articulating.

and last one... not strictly manga but i have really enjoyed keeping up with wanan's webcomic no home recently... its a long one, but i read about 275 chapters of it in like 3 days, because it's that hard to put down, LOL... extremely inspiring character writing and also just insanely fun, eunyung became an all time favorite character of mine on impact and it has one of those casts where you can't help but have fun watching them be together in literally any situation. it's about a bunch of kids with shitty family situations trying to figure out to learn to live with eachother. its an extremely good example of mundane character drama being written so compellingly that it will make you start slamming your head on walls at work. Speaking from experience.

miscellany... everyone tells you to read witch hat atelier, do it its good... everyone tells you to read dungeon meshi do that its good... Chainsaw man part 2 is getting crazy right now ...... uhhh... i have a billion more so if none of those interest you let me know and i'll share more. thank yew so much for your interest in my opinions and i hope there's something here you can appreciate!!!~~

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mtqcomic · 2 months

Note

decided to make some mtq incorrect quotes and thought that I'd put them here (sorry if they're out of character- incorrect quotes tend to do that sometimes no matter how much you shuffle the names to get the right characters ToT)(also I censored the swears in the quotes just in case)

Gendaen: Operation no more distractions is a go! not even 10 seconds later Gendaen: Oh, look! A butterfly! -

Gendaen: Ocàyuu, you risked your life to save me! Ocàyuu: And I’d do it again! And perhaps a third time! But that would be it.

alternatively:

Gendaen: Mysta, you risked your life to save me! Mysta: And I’d do it again! And perhaps a third time! But that would be it.

Eth: May Destiny (and this picture of Gendaen eating shredded cheese at 3 in the morning) be with you.

(they probably won't interact in canon BUT)

Gendaen: gets a text Oh! It’s Malvox. Zaïl, excitedly: Did it get me the stuff? Gendaen: Yeah, it says it got you the clown costume, the power drill, and 12 gallons of blood. Zaïl: Wow! Where did it find 12 gallons of fake blood? Gendaen: You wanted fake blood? Zaïl: Gendaen: I’ll go call Malvox.

(okay but this one might be canon /half joking)

Malvox: I am literally evil incarnate. Malvox: I’m not actually, I just enjoy being evil. Malvox: Which I think actually makes it even more evil because I’m making a conscious effort.

(he's thinking about his newest building project Eth, let the man think /lighthearted)

Eth: Are you listening to me? Gendaen: nods Eth: What did I just say? Gendaen: nods Eth: …

Malvox quotes are really fun because it is just so mean to everybody and there's a surprisingly large amount of quotes in the generator that are like that

Malvox: Let’s write Eth a friendly note, shall we? Dear… Incompetent… Dumb*ss…

based on that one post of Eth (you know which one)

Mysta: Question, how difficult would it be to bowl in a bee suit? Gendaen: Not that hard, I don't think, as long as you can move. Eth: I'd assume as hard as it is to bowl in a maid outfit. Eth: Wouldn't be any harder, but you'd get some WEIRD looks. Mysta: Are. Are you speaking from experience. Eth: No! Eth: Eth: ….Maybe.

Gendaen: Malvox, please calm down. Malvox: I asked for two large fries! Malvox: dumps fries onto table Malvox: But all they did was give me a MILLION F*CKING LITTLE ONES!

Zaïl, texting Yele: I’m a theif. Yele: Thief. Zaïl: Theif. Yele: I before E except after C. Zaïl: Thceif. Yele: No.

(the reunion, silly edition)

Eth: You gave me up, you let me down, you turned around, and deserted me. Gendaen: But did I make you cry? Eth: cries on the spot Gendaen: …Sh*t.

Zaïl: I’m a fool, not an idiot.

Eth: We always used to do the Wordle rather than take notes in class. Eth: To stop us the teacher would always threaten to tell us the answer if we didn’t pay attention.

(to be honest I have no idea what this quote is saying I got lost halfway through-)

Eth: I’m taking a look at your numbers, and it doesn’t look good. You have a lot of measurements. Quite a few variables. Mysta: Is that… bad? Eth: Variables are the #1 risk factor for outcomes. The past is a big contributor to the future. Mysta: Isn’t that just causality? Eth: Causality is the leading cause of death in this country. Mysta: So what are my odds? Eth: Do you have a family history? Mysta: Of what? Eth: Just, in general. Mysta: …Yes? Eth: Oh no.

Yele: Zaïl! I thought you were dead! Zaïl: No, just in deep cover. Yele: …But it was an open casket. Zaïl: It was very deep.

Mysta: I have an idea. Zaïl: A good idea? Mysta: Let's not get ahead of ourselves.

Zaïl: An apple a day keeps the doctor away! Malvox: An apple a day can keep anyone away if you throw it hard enough.

Everyone is giving advice to Mysta Eth: It's okay to ask for help. Gendaen: You're not a burden. Malvox: Murder is okay. Yele: Your feelings matter.

Zaïl, over radio: Testing. Testing. Yele, can you hear me? Yele, standing next to Zaïl: I’m standing right here. Zaïl: You’re coming through good and loud. Yele: ‘Cause I’m standing right here.

Malvox: Regular soda is too sweet! Ocàyuu: Diet soda has a weird aftertaste! Malvox: No! Ugh, oh my goodness. Diet soda is THE BEST! It doesn't have sugar! It's SPICY! Ocàyuu: It has other weird stuff in it! I'll take REGULAR sugar in my REGULAR soda! Malvox: It's SO SWEET like it's a dessert though! Diet feels more like a drink! Ocàyuu: I'm going to physically attack you. Malvox: Which is better, Gendaen? Gendaen: Oh, I usually drink water! Ocàyuu: Wha- NO! Malvox: DISGUSTING!

Eth: I think I need a hug… Gendaen: Good thing I'm hug shaped! 45 minutes later Eth: You… you can let go now. Gendaen: No, I absolutely cannot.

I feel like if anybody were to be the therapist friend it would be Ocàyuu. She seemed pretty chill from what we've seen of her

Ocàyuu, looking at the squad: Okay, so I need to become a therapist faster.

Zaïl: Dang it, the printer broke while printing out Gendaen's birthday invitations. Eth: Well, what are they supposed to say? Zaïl: "Gendaen's birthday". Eth: So, what do they say instead? Zaïl: "Gendaen’s bi". Eth: Eth: Works out either way.

I hope that everybody teams up someday it would be SO fun to watch-

Zaïl: So don't panic but one of us is possessed by an owl…. Yele: …. Gendaen: ….. Eth: …… Mysta: ..Who? Zaïl: That's the thing we don't- Everyone stares at Mysta

would Zaïl play video games

Zaïl: You… you said I could trust you!! Zaïl: You said you were a GAMER!!! Malvox: Zaïl… I only play mobile games. Zaïl: NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!

why do I feel like Gendaen was a bit of a chaos gremlin on top of all the paragon hero stuff

Gendaen: Remember that time you dared me to lick a swingset? Eth: No, I said "Gendaen, don't lick that swingset" and you said "Don't tell me what to do" and licked the swingset.

during the Nelun Soma'o fight

Eth: …I'm pretty sure that shield is fire-proof, or something. Mysta, eyeing the boxes of explosives: Alright, but is it explosion-proof?

wise words, Zaïl

Zaïl: Fruits that do not live up to their names; passionfruit, grapefruit, honeydew and dragonfruit. Zaïl: Fruits that do live up to their names? Zaïl: Orange.

Gendaen: I think I did fairly well on my anatomy quiz! :) Mysta: I forgot I was doing a test. Gendaen: Mysta. Mysta: I said the vertebrae was the back stick because I thought it was funny…. Eth: Mysta.

Gendaen: Three of the four elements are represented as types of hockey. Air hockey, ice hockey, and field hockey. Fire hockey needs to be a thing. Eth: Fire hockey absolutely does NOT need to be a thing. Mysta: Do you care NOTHING for the balance of the four elements?!

to be fair she is a giant hivemind brain thing

Gendaen: I'm very scary. Ocàyuu: You're about as scary as a wet kitten. Gendaen: Wet kittens are cute, at least I've got that going for me. Ocàyuu: And small. Gendaen: Gendaen: …Yeah, yeah. I guess.

Mysta: Okay. Hypothetically speaking, how mad would you be if I burned a hot pocket so badly it could probably fall off a ten-story building and be completely fine? Yele: Mysta, what did you do? Mysta: Take a guess.

Malvox: I’ve been described as a ‘heartless villain’ and a 'little sh*t’, but I prefer… 'has alternative ways of having fun’.

Eth: Um. What kind of tea is this? Mysta: I boiled gatorade.

Yele: We just ate. Why are you making pancakes? Mysta: For the dogs. Yele: Why are you making pancakes for the dogs? Mysta: They don't know how.

Mysta: Let's all agree that going up the stairs on all fours is actually the best experience on earth. Gendaen: Conversely, going down the stairs on all fours is actually the most terrifying experience on earth.

Gendaen: I made lightly fried fish fillets for dinner. Eth: Gendaen, It’s 1:15 am, what the f*ck. Gendaen: Do you want the lightly fried fish fillets or not. Eth: Well, I mean yeah. Gendaen: So come downstairs while they’re still hot. Eth: Wait, you just made them? Gendaen: Yeah, I wasn’t tired so I decided to make lightly fried fish fillets. Eth: Say lightly fried fish fillets one more time Gendaen.

I can never figure out what the possessive for the it pronouns are *faceplants* (/lighthearted)

Ocàyuu, about Malvox: Its covered in blood again. Why is it that its always covered in blood? Gendaen: Well, it looks like it's its own blood this time.

Mysta: on the phone Hey Eth, do you know my blood type? Eth: Of course, it's B-. Mysta: Oh, I guessed wrong. Excuse me, nurse-!

for some reason some of those quotes are giving Legend of Maxx energy. I can absolutely imagine Maxx saying "slunchy"

Gendaen: Problem, I can't tell if this food is over-sauced or undercooked. Zaïl: Solution, just pop it back in the oven for another 10 minutes. There's at least a 50% chance that'll fix it, right? Eth: Result? Food has somehow become unpleasantly soggy and unpleasantly crunchy at the exact same time. Mysta: No better time than this to pull out my favorite word! Slunchy! Yele: …put it away.

Zaïl in these quotes is kind of giving cool cousin energy

Yele: It’s Pride Month, you know what that means! Mysta: I get to eat as many Skittles as I want? Eth: What? No! What has Zaïl been telling you? Zaïl, walking in, pouring Skittles into their mouth: Taste the rainbow, b*tch.

I mean they do canonically have a gun

Zaïl, holding a gun: If the conspiracies about life being a simulation are true WHOEVERS CONTROLLING MY SIM I JUST WANNA TALK.

Malvox: I refuse to apologize for being weird or off-putting or slightly evil (or more than slightly evil). That’s actually your problem. I’m having a fantastic time!

Eth: We need a plan to beat them. Mysta: Okay, listen up. First, we fill their shoes with wet cat food. Eth: Mysta: Judge me all you want, I get results.

what kind of conversations do you think they'd have

Malvox: Sometimes I like to place my hands on someone’s cheeks, look into their eyes… Malvox: …And violently jerk their head until it snaps. Gendaen: …That took an unexpected turn. Ocàyuu: So did their neck.

Eth: What do you three have to say for yourself? Zaïl: Gendaen: Mysta: Oops?

Gendaen, to the Squad: The real secret to immortality? Not dying. You want to be immortal? Okay, that’s easy. Just don’t die. That’s it. Refuse to die. There you go. Mysta: But how- Gendaen, ignoring her: “But how”, you may ask. Well, easy. Just don’t do it. Refuse to. Say “no thanks”.

Gendaen: Don't quote me on this, but I believe murder is illegal!

if Gendaen somehow convinced Eth to wear a cat maid outfit then I think this isn't entirely out of the realm of possibility either

While planning to break in somewhere Gendaen: Hey, let's do "Get Help!" Eth: What? Gendaen: "Get Help." Eth: No. Gendaen: C'mon, you love it! Eth: I hate it. Gendaen: It's great! It works every time! Eth: It's humiliating. Gendaen: Do you have a better plan? Eth: No. Gendaen: We're doing it! Eth: We are not doing "Get Help!" A Minute Later Gendaen, carrying Eth: Get help! Please! He's dying! Help him! throws Eth at guards, knocking them out Gendaen: Ahh, classic! Eth: gets up I still hate it. It's humiliating. Gendaen, laughing: Not for me, it's not.

aaand that's it for now I will be back with more

maybe

byeeeeeeeeeeee- *disappears in a puff of smoke*

Certified Canon ✔

#obviously not everything here is in character per se but honestly most of it is surprisingly accurate #even the gendaen ones and he's barely said anything all comic #i also really appreciate the malvox ones. i think you get why it's my favourite character to write dialogue for #and wow you actually typed the diaeresis in Zaïl's name every time. good work #really appreciate this!#ask #ask dk

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beautifulpersonpeach · 2 years

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BPP, have you hated a song at first listen before but then tried to listen to it again and you ended up liking it?

Cuz that’s what happened to me with PTD. I remember listening to it when it dropped with a kind of grimace? on my face and refusing to listen to it again right after. My brain didn’t like how it sounded at all. But when the members performed it live, I really loved it, especially when they first did it at PTD concerts. I really grew to appreciate how happy it makes you feel. And the concert variation has so many interesting elements to it compared to the recorded version too. It sounds so fresh and peppy. I think I just didn’t like the autotune? and how it made them sound so flat to me. Now I’m going through it with Dreamer too but I don’t think it’s cuz of autotune since I think Jungkook sounds okay in it. I didn’t like it at first listen but I’ll give it a chance with the live performance once twitter ARMYs clips it.

Ask 2: i have a lovehate relationship with your blog. i thought you were full of yourself and a bit annoying when you didn't reply to my ask on jk performing at the world cup.. i felt like you told me to shut up and be quiet by not replying me even when i explained everything the whole controversy you just said everybody should do what they want like you didn't care about jk. sorry for saying that i now see your point.

Hi Anon(s),

Anon 1, your experience with PTD is almost exactly like mine. I also found PTD too sweet, too sugary in an artificial way, the first time I heard it. But I really liked the song played live in concert. You sent this ask to me a long while ago Anon, so I wonder if Dreamers did in fact grow on you.

Personally, Dreamers just isn't a song that can grow on me. The potential of that happening is already maxed out and I'm still indifferent. My mom is a huge fan of the song though, and obsessed with one particular tiktok edit of JK singing the song lol. Apparently, he's her bias now.

...

This is a bit of a personal tidbit, but my mom usually does not care for k-pop or anything related to BTS. But for the last few weeks she's expressed strong pride in her heritage and always mentioned BTS in the same sentence. To see Jungkook singing the opening song at the World Cup, to seeing Korea's team advance into the tournament... I'm not sure if my followers are keeping up with news out of Korea but a lot of fucked up shit is happening right now. Korea's participation and profile at the World Cup unexpectedly turned out to be one of the few bright spots lately. I personally did not have a strong opinion one way or the other about Jungkook performing at the World Cup, and I still don't. Like I guessed, many of the people up in arms about him performing there still watched the world cup and hyped it in one way or other, or they did nothing actually towards the cause they appeared so passionate about. And while that's not necessarily wrong, it's lame. My opinion on the underlying issues is that many of those issues are rampant in Korea, and we can all compartmentalize for this, but somehow never for brown cultures, generally speaking. And again that's not wrong per se, but it's inconsistent. And lame.

As the boys mature and get into other ventures, it's very possible they'll do things and/or collaborate with people we disagree with for whatever reason. And each time the fandom will react the way it has always done: each individual will do what they want. Just as they did during this World Cup. So Anon 2, I just thought to cut the bullshit and get to the crux of it for all the panicky asks I was getting about JK performing at the World Cup. I felt that outside a handful of people who truly care, most of the anxiety around JK performing was performative, and that eventually people will do what they actually want to, which is get on with whatever is happening which at the time will be watching the World Cup. And that's what happened.

#bts #dreamers

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septembersghost · 2 years

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Which memphis mafia members do you consider reliable sources when it comes to Elvis?

this is a tricky question because i know opinions vary and accounts have notable discrepancies...it's difficult with everything surrounding elvis because it often feels like, to one degree or another, everybody was looking for a way to exploit their connections to him (not necessarily in a malicious way, though some definitely have done that, but just insofar as everybody relying on him and their stories and experiences with him financially and for other assorted reasons, as comments in this thread mention), and did so especially once he died and had no say in any of it. i have a lot of qualms with the total lack of hesitation in sharing intimate details about his life with the general public that go a bit far beyond explaining his character and experiences, and yet at the same time of course there's an insatiable curiosity and market for it because people want to know about him. it makes me think of the preface shared from june's book: “There have been lots of books written about Elvis Presley, of course, with probably as many personal memoirs among them as have attached to any other cultural figure or entertainer in history. Some have been spurious, a number seem to have been written out of little more than personal rancor, motivation has ranged from love to money to self-adumbration..."

i'm rambling, but sometimes it's difficult to sift out the people still looking after e and his personhood versus those using him for their gain. jerry i would count easily as one of the former, perhaps the most obvious choice there. maybe george klein and billy smith? perspectives range all over the place on charlie hodge, joe esposito, marty lacker, lamar fike, the stanleys, and even larry geller (despite elvis often being open and vulnerable/trusting with him in particular), to the point where i feel like we have to take everything with a grain of salt and be circumspect about individual subjectivity and agendas. red and sonny i struggle with for *multiple* reasons, and given what they did to him (and whoever the third one was involved with that book. god el i'm sorry sometimes i cannot keep track of all of your people...), i think it cut him to the core, from which he did not recover (and he didn't have time). but i also respect elvis' inherent generosity and kindness and forgiving qualities that he extended to the people he loved, even when he was hurt.

tl;dr ugh sorry this is not a particularly helpful answer because it involves so many factors and complicated people. tbh i'm probably not the best person to ask this because my little introvert self that cares more about elvis' humanity and artistry than some of the noise and chaos around him is way less informed about each of those guys as individuals. i do think they all loved him in their own ways, to one degree or another, but their usefulness and incentives in sticking by him could be mercurial. and e was far from perfect himself and i'm sure many aspects of being in that group were not easy, he was responsible for many of his choices, but he also had a retinue of people clinging to his lifestyle. it can be painful to observe how he had this mix of enablers and dependents around him as constant companions and everything still unraveled the way that it did.

edit: i went to the sub to see if i could find you a better/more comprehensive response quickly and still turned up a lot of dispute, but this comment speaks to some of it (also funny how some of the comments here use similar language to what i'd already written, i appreciate seeing those thoughts from others): Each has told their version of their story and of course each person is the hero of their own story, and many paint themselves as Elvis's One True Best Friend. Some, as you mention, had proper jobs, others were really, truly sycophantic hangers-on, some were true blue friends and brothers, and some would barely qualify as part of the "Memphis Mafia" at all - they just happened to be in the right place at the right time and latched on to what little time they had in his periphery. For most who care, I think it comes down to an individual by individual basis...Personally, I think more attention should really be placed on the artists, songwriters and creatives whose influence impacted Elvis's actual creative and commercial achievements and legacy. But people like hearing celebrity gossip, and Elvis fans have always been voracious to consume anything and everything they can about him. People also like picking sides and being in opposing tribes, even over the most petty shit. In our collective cultural grief over the loss of Elvis, trying to grasp onto anything and everything left that we could, we gave them all attention to hear them say nice things, and the media happily gave a platform to those who were willing to help tear Elvis down off the pedestal his fans put him on, too. I think, at the end of the day, people are looking for understanding about what happened. Many would like to take their sides and lay moral judgment on all of them and everything they've said or did, as though talking about who was or wasn't at fault for what happened would change things or help us understand what happened any better. But we weren't there, and never can go back and be there. Some were good, some were bad, some just happened to kinda be there because Elvis wanted or needed them for whatever reason. The only sure truth is that Elvis died regardless of all of them - which is a tragedy. And they're all just background characters who've taken up too much time on center stage. And now that most of them have left, I think it's about time to bring the curtain down.

#this is a bad response i apologize #idk the way he relied on that group because of the loneliness and isolation and yet still dealt with such loneliness and isolation... :(#sometimes i want to punch a lot of them in the face which. well. doesn't help either haha #anonymous #letterbox #elvis presley

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automatismoateo · 1 year

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God are the American Christians pain in a butt. via /r/atheism

God, are the American Christians pain in a butt. I mean, don't get me wrong, we have some characters here too. Grandma won't speak to you, Christmas with family is hell, priest is the village boss for some reason etc. but the kind and numbers of stories we hear from US is mind-blowing. And the fact that some of you are completely alienated by your whole community is just unimaginable for me. My parents brought us up catholic, but let's be honest, everybody was catholic back then, so... I went to mass every Sunday with friends (my parents never wen't but threw us First Communion parties), sang in choir which was fun and argued with the sister teaching religion. Snuck from church to drink with classmates and visit churches on school trips. Grandma took us every time we visited over the weekend - she's the only one that cares, but she kinda accepted we're all on another page, I think she believes in God's eyes it doesn't metter. Now most of my friends identify as atheists of some sort, some are catholic, but I wouldn't be able to remember who exactly. I live in the countryside and everybody around probably goes to church, but nobody holds that against us. Obviously. Most people I know have similar experiences, maybe with some angry old folk or pissy parents mixed in, some have it worse - I'm lucky, but I just don't hear many horror stories. If any, they are in relation to JW. It's a sect, and sects are everywhere. But the most we hear about are in the US. Holy f*ck, I can't believe those stories. Monsters everywhere o_o And the readiness of people to argue, or even impose or assume... it just seem so alien to me. I'm deeply sorry if you ever had to deal with this sh*t, even more so if you're in the midst of it. [edit: spelling. Sorry for any bad English] Submitted September 14, 2023 at 11:20PM by Buraku_returns (From Reddit https://ift.tt/K8NW1Vm)

#reddit

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therealvinelle · 3 years

Note

do you have any thoughts on bree tanner?

On Bree Tanner herself, not so much. I did read her book, and from my recollection (I lent it to a friend who never gave it back. And I’m pretty sure she didn’t even read it(!)) Bree is pretty much what she’s presented as.

She’s not stupid, but she’s not particularly intelligent either, she’s nice, but not a saint. She has been a vampire for only a few months, but she has already lost her empathy for humans. She’s an introvert who cares deeply for her friend Fred and crush Diego. She was never inclined to fight anybody, and spent the newborn battle just sort of mingling in quiet terror.

She’s a sweet person I’m sure would have made a pleasant addition to the Cullen coven, but ultimately she’s not remarkable.

When it comes to Diego, her supposed mate... hm. For those who didn’t read the book, Riley told the newborns they had to stay in the shadows or they’d burn in the sun. Bree gets a huge crush on one of the other newborns, and they find out vampires actually sparkle. This changes everything! Diego goes to tell Riley about the sparkling. Diego goes to live on a farm after that. No, really, that’s pretty much what Riley tells everybody. Diego is fine, he’s on a very special assignment, next question. Bree eventually figures out that Diego is dead, and her grief combined with a lot of other factors lead to her concluding life is miserable. She dies thinking “Oh well, guess I had a good run.”

Not unsurprisingly, I not only don’t believe in mates, but I also don’t think Diego was anything close to it for Bree either. They were close friends, Bree found out he was dead, and had no time to process it. More, vampires feel very strongly, and this was the only truly emotional event to befall Bree. It knocked her out completely. So, that she then decides she doesn’t mind dying because there’s no point living in a world without Diego seems to me to be a reaction born of her being young (both for a vampire and a human), emotionally inexperienced, and having been hit by this news less than an hour earlier. Had she lived, she would have been just fine.

So, those are my thoughts on Bree Tanner as a person.

Bree Tanner's impact is a different matter.

I think her death was one of the catalysts for the plot of Breaking Dawn.

The vampires in Seattle all died, Victoria included. There were no one left who knew Bree, and her life would have been a moment lost in time, like tears in the rain (Sorry, couldn’t resist).

But there were the Cullens. More specifically, Carlisle.

Carlisle had spent his formative years in Volterra, and parted with Aro in friendly terms. He remained fond of Aro, and continued to think highly of him. He and Aro would have spoken of the Volturi, of the Volturi mission, of how such a law is enforced, and it is prudent to also assume that Carlisle would have witnessed at least a few trials. He came away from all that thinking of the Volturi as strict, but fair rulers.

Jasper, by comparison (I’m bringing him in because I think he’s more representative of how your average vampire who hasn’t been Aro’s boytoy for decades would view the Volturi), shivers in fright at the mere thought of the Volturi. To him they were executioners. But, again, fair. You break the law, and the Volturi descend upon you like God of the Old Testament.

Then cut to Eclipse, Victoria’s got a newborn army wreaking havoc in Seattle, attracting a lot of attention in a developed country in a time of globalized news. They’re on CNN daily. They might as well write “Fuck the Volturi” in the sky.

And the Volturi do nothing.

Now why, Carlisle and his family wonders, would they do such a thing?

Edward has all the answers, of course - that Aro is choosing not to intervene because he doesn’t like how large and powerful Carlisle’s coven has gotten, and Victoria’s newborn army will take care of that for him. Edward also goes on about how Aro desperately wants him and Alice by his side, which does prompt an “... you sure about that?” from Carlisle, but ultimately Aro’s inaction on the subject speaks for itself and Carlisle can’t make any excuses for it.

Regardless of Aro’s motives, that the Volturi would not be coming to enforce their own law became very clear. As a result of their inaction, Carlisle was forced to betray several of his own principles. He had to ask Jasper to teach the family how to kill others, he had to accept the aid of teenagers who could very well get themselves killed, he had to put his beloved family at risk, and he had to kill other vampires.

Aro’s inaction put him through hell and could have gotten his family killed. Would have, if it weren’t for the wolves.

Jane then decides to make her entrance right after the battle ended, while the fire is still going. The timing could not be more clear: the Volturi were waiting it out, letting the Cullens be culled.

We then get to Bree, who was an innocent in all the ways that counted, and not at risk of repeat offenses. Jane executes her anyway. Not just that, she makes sure to torture Bree, twice, entirely gratuitously:

“She’ll tell you anything you want to know,” Edward said through his teeth. “You don’t have to do that.”

Jane looked up, sudden humor in her usually dead eyes. “Oh, I know,” she said to Edward, grinning at him before she turned back to the young vampire, Bree. (Eclipse, page 333)

Even if the execution can be justified, the torture cannot. Jane abuses her power because she can, and there’s nothing the Cullens can do about it.

Then you have the fact that Bree had overheard a conversation between Jane and Victoria in which Jane gave Victoria explicit permission to take out the Cullens on the Volturi’s behalf. Bree replays this for Edward to hear before she dies, validating every paranoia he ever had about the Volturi. Just because he didn’t tell Bella, doesn’t mean he didn’t tell his family. He certainly would have told Carlisle and Alice.

Over the course of Eclipse, Carlisle sees the Volturi neglect to enforce their own law because culling his coven is a higher priority to them, torture and execute a mostly innocent vampire, and then he finds out that they made a deal with Victoria.

Not only would he be massively disillusioned by the Volturi, but by Aro himself. The man he met in Volterra was a lover of the arts and the academics and spoke of justice among vampires, and then Carlisle gets to experience first hand just what kind of justice this is. Aro was not the person he thought he was, and their old friendship doesn’t count for much either.

Look then to Breaking Dawn, where Carlisle has a vampiric child, but not an immortal one. Like Bree, he is innocent in all the ways that counted. This did not help Bree, and given the events of Eclipse (and remember only six months have passed), it won’t help him either. The Volturi have made it clear that they want to take out his coven, and whether or not the Cullens are actually innocent won’t matter.

The only way he can hope to slow them down, to force some kind accountability upon the Volturi (an accountability that might have preserved Bree’s life: she died because Jane had none), is to have there be witnesses to their trial.

And we get the clusterfuck called Breaking Dawn (or as I like to call it, Aro and Carlisle Break Up).

Relevant meta.

Edit 16th of April: Aro’s side of things

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ursaminortarot · 3 years

Text

I’m really fixated on romance right now for some reason, so here we are with a soulmate reading. I’m of the belief that we don’t just have romantic soulmates but platonic and familial ones as well. However, for this reading, I am choosing to focus solely on romance.

I’m experimenting with a new format. I linked each of the readings to a google doc, this is mostly because they ended up being way longer than I’d anticipated (story of my life). I also thought that it might be more organized to do it this way. I’d appreciate feedback on whether or not I should keep doing it.

Piles to choose from:

Pile 1 - Cobra

Pile 2 - Fish

Pile 3 - Cheetah

Pile 4 - Zebra

Pile 5 - Hawk

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[Decks Used: Modern Witch Tarot, Wild Unknown Tarot, Wild Unknown Animal Spirit oracle, Tarot Cats, standard playing cards, and a homemade oracle deck]

This took me 10-11 hours to do, spread out across 3 days. So, if you can support my shop or donate I’d be grateful. Also, please excuse any grammar/spelling mistakes and small incoherencies, by the time I got around to editing the readings I was kind of over it.

My Shop: https://www.etsy.com/shop/UrsaMinorTarot

CashApp: @UrsaMinorTarot

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Pile 1: Cobra

Who They Are:

Queen of Wands, 9 of Wands, 8 of Pentacles, King of Clubs

10 of Cups, 7 of Cups r, Justice r, 5 of Hearts

7 of Cups r, 9 of Pentacles r, 6 of Wands, 9 of Diamonds

Death r, 7 of Wands r, 8 of Wands r, Ace of Spades

The High Priestess, The Fool, The Hanged Man r, Ace of Hearts

Mother of Cups r

Winter+New Love

I’m getting some self-made energy here, they are likely a very hard worker who puts in a lot of time and energy. Their success, while appreciated, makes them feel very alone. There’s a lot of wands energy here, so they are generous with their money and it’s possible that other people take advantage of that. The Mother of Cups reversed reinforces this idea as she brings the message: “you give too much of yourself to others”.

The High Priestess, Fool, and Hanged Man being pulled together makes me think they function in two very different ways. Either, they overthink literally everything to the point of never making a decision, or they just do things very impulsively without a second thought.

They want a big, happy family, whatever that means to them. It could involve having children or just having a lot of pets. However, due to past relationships, they no longer feel as though they could trust anyone enough to live out that dream.

They feel disillusioned with love, which gives them a lot of conflicting emotions. Because, again, there’s a lot of wands energy, so they’re a very passionate person. Their current belief that love isn’t real is a direct contradiction to who they are at their core. Winter and new love could be taken literally, like you’ll meet and fall in love with them in the winter. Or, if you wanted to look deeper at it, it could mean that you help them get out of this place of being unable to consider love.

How You Can Recognize Them:

8 of Cups r, Son of Wands, 7 of Wands r, King of Diamonds

5 of Pentacles, Father of Cups, 3 of Swords, Jack of Hearts

The Devil r, The Fool, The Devil, 2 of Spades

10 of Pentacles, The High Priestess r, Queen of Hearts

The Hermit, 7 of Pentacles r, 10 of Cups r, 7 of Diamonds

Hanged man, 4 of Cups r, 10 of Diamonds r

“You’re having trouble getting in touch with your emotions”

“You’re not seeing clearly”

This person has an unmistakable light about them. Being with them is like sitting outside on a nice day soaking up the sun. However, they are still holding on to the past, and this is to their detriment. When you meet them, if you haven’t already, they will be extremely hung up on their ex. They are going to be obsessing over what went wrong and whether or not they can fix it. I can’t tell if they want to fix it to get back together with their ex, because they think it will give them closure, or because they think it will help them avoid making the same mistakes in their next relationship. But, they also don’t actually want to fix anything because that would mean confronting their emotions and they would really rather not. They will likely seem to be existing outside of reality, they are going to be so distracted by this internal conflict that they aren’t going to notice the world around them.

In all honesty, they will be very difficult for you to recognize. You’ll probably notice them because of their light, but you won’t (and shouldn’t) consider them a potential partner - at least not until they’ve dealt with their issues and moved on. I want to stress that while they are so focused on their past relationship(s), that’s not all they have going on. They are a 3 dimensional human being like the rest of us, but this is just the information I was able to get.

I also want to mention that their family is very important to them, they’re the type of person to call or text each member of their immediate family every day. I also get the impression that you two will be friends for a while before getting into a relationship.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Pile 2: Fish

Who They Are:

Queen of Swords, 9 of Wands, 9 of Cups r, The Tower r, Jack of Spades

King of Swords, Daughter of Wands, 3 of Pentacles, 8 of Diamonds

Judgment r, 2 of Cups r, Daughter of Swords r, The Chariot r, 3 of Spades

5 of Pentacles, Temperance, 7 of Wands, Jack of Hearts

The Emperor, 8 of Pentacles, The Magician r, Ace of Wands, 4 of Spades

“I’m sorry”

Best friends

Between the Emperor and having all of the court cards of the Swords suit, this person has a very powerful presence. They’re almost the kind of person that makes people stop and stare, I say almost because they’re intimidating and people don’t want to be caught staring. Not intimidating in a scary way, they just - and I can’t stress this enough - exude power. They are also very ambitious and highly intelligent. So when they put their mind to something, they will execute it perfectly. Or, at least, they want people to think it was done perfectly. They have a very “everything’s under control” look to them, but they’re barely hanging on by a thread. I feel like one bad day would send them into an existential spiral, because they don’t know who they are if they’re not perfect.

Nothing’s ever come easily to them and they’ve had to fight their whole life to get the things that they have now. They’ve never had the option of giving up. If they gave up, they were worthless, they were nothing - that’s how they’ve always seen it. I imagine there’s a lot of parental pressure at play here. It’s turned them into a workaholic, there’s no work-life balance to be found. I’m getting the impression that the “I’m sorry” card has to do with this aspect of their life.

The “best friends” card speaks for itself. With the Jack of Hearts and Daughter of Wands, there’s a playful energy to them. But these are the only cards pointing this out, which tells me that they restrain this part of themself. I think that you being their friend, as well as their partner, will show them that they don’t need to be so serious all the time. This is something buried so deep it’ll need some time and energy to be coaxed out of them.

This is pretty obvious, but this person’s biggest fear is failure.

How You Can Recognize Them:

Knight of Wands r, 4 of Wands r, 8 of Cups, 9 of Swords

King of Pentacles, The Moon r, 7 of Swords r, Queen of Spades

5 of Pentacles, Mother of Swords, Queen of Wands, 4 of Hearts

Queen of Cups, Daughter of Swords r, Knight of Wands

7 of Cups r, Son of Swords, 4 of Pentacle, 5 of Diamonds

The World r, 9 of Wands r, 8 of Hearts r

You feel as if you aren’t getting the recognition you deserve

Seperation

We’re definitely seeing their more sensitive, playful aspects. However, these are still vastly overpowered by their Swords energy as, once again, all the court cards are out - the Queen’s out twice. Seriously, this person has such powerful energy that it’s the first thing you notice.

I feel like you’ll meet either at work or at school, somewhere where you’re working on a group project together. The people you’re working with aren’t going to take your contributions seriously. But, once they realize you’re right, they’ll claim they were their ideas all along. The Swords family is very fair-minded, so I think this person’s going to have a problem with that.

They have this very detached, uninterested persona and once you’ve spent time around your soulmate, you’re going to pick up on the fact that they are deeper than they want people to think they are. When they’re more comfortable with you, which will take some time, you might catch glimpses of them being competitive/hot-headed or they’ll start making jokes around you. If you’re patient enough, they’ll eventually be vulnerable with you.

They have a fear of the unknown and love is foreign to them, so this is definitely a slow-burn.

In both of these readings I got a wave of pretty interesting energy. It wasn’t anxiety or dizziness, but felt similar to both. I felt like I lost my balance, that’s probably how you'll make this person feel. They have a lot of plans for life and you’re not one of them, so they’ll be thrown for a loop.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Pile 3: Cheetah:

Who They Are:

Page of Swords r, Son of Cups, The Hierophant, 9 of Clubs

Page of Wands, Mother of Wands r, Page of Cups r, 4 of Hearts

9 of Cups, The Tower, 2 of Swords, 2 of Cups, Ace of Clubs

Queen of Wands r, The Chariot r, Queen of Pentacles, 4 of Spades

Knight of Pentacles, Ace of Wands, Emperor r, 6 of Clubs

8 of Cups, King of Wands

You can’t help everyone

Over-investment in work

Aries

The first thing that I’m seeing is that this person will probably have some self-esteem issues. It seems to be tied to their abilities more so than appearance.

They have a lot of ideas for projects that they want to work on, but they never seem to start anything, let alone finish. I think this is because they try to be everything to everyone and don’t prioritize themself. They find contentment in the idea that everybody likes them, but this can make them a people pleaser. This can lead to them taking on long hours at work to make their boss happy. It’s also unrealistic because there’s not a person on Earth that’s universally liked. I think this is something they’ll come to realize in their own time.

They may come across as indecisive at times, they aren’t. They always know exactly what they want, but can have a hard time asserting themself.

There’s a fire that burns bright here, this person has a lot of drive and ambition. This is where that aries energy comes in, they don’t have to have aries placements so please don’t get fixated on that. But, like I said before, they hold themself back by prioritizing other people and neglecting their own needs. They have the potential to be really successful, however they need to start putting themself first.

This seems like a very sensitive individual, just the thought of doing something under-handed stresses them out. Which is a good thing for other people, because your soulmate’s very charming and could probably talk themself out of anything.

For some reason I get the impression that they have a bit of a sweet tooth.

How You Can Recognize Them:

2 of Swords r, The Empress, Queen of Cups, 3 of Hearts

9 of Pentacles r, Judgment r, The Moon, 10 of Spades

The Fool, Mother of Wands r, Hierophant r, Jack of Diamonds

The Chariot r, The Hermit, 4 of Wands, Joker B&W r

3 of Pentacles, 4 of Wands r, Knight of Wands, 4 of Spades

King of Cups r, The Magician r

You’re having trouble getting in touch with your emotions

September

Think before you speak

Let’s start with the reinforcements of their self-esteem issues, as well as their people pleasing tendencies. It’s exhausting for them, emotionally and physically. They are well and truly holding themself back, and I think that by the time you meet them they’ll be starting to examine these aspects of themself. This will be something they struggle with for a while and there may be a period of time where they withdraw to think things through.

The joker in black and white in standard decks is my fool reversed card, but it’s reversed so its the fool reversed reversed. The fool upright, I feel like there could have been a simpler way for my cards to get that message to me. But I also feel like it represents the way your person talks to themself, they make everything just a little bit more complicated than it needs to be. They think in circles, eventually getting to the point but it may take them a while. This may be a contributing factor to their perceived indecisiveness.

They want to make a home with you. I get the impression that when talking about it with you, they’ll appear to be cool and collected. Like it’s not a big deal to them. But then they’ll turn around and shout it from the rooftops. It won’t be possible for people to not know you’re together, they’ll just be so loud about it.

Outside of the need to make everybody like them, they’re a pretty care-free individual. It will be important to them that you have fun together. I think this playfulness is their most defining feature and probably the first thing people notice about them.

In the first two piles, it looked like they’d be friends for a while before getting into a relationship with their person. That’s not the case here, like I said before, when this person knows, they know. They’re not going to waste time with you.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Pile 4: Zebra

Who They Are:

The Fool, The Hanged Man, Queen of Swords, Ace of Clubs

6 of Swords r, 2 of Wands, The Hanged Man, Ace of Hearts

Ace of Cups, Mother of Pentacles r, 4 of Wands, Jack of Spades,

3 of Swords r, The Magician, 10 of Pentacles, Queen of Cups r, Jack of Diamonds

3 of Cups, The High Priestess, Strength, The Fool r, King of Spades

Soulmate

Hostile

May

The first thing I’m picking up on is that your soulmate is someone who is very carefree. They also have a lot of romantic energy to them, so they are definitely a hopeless romantic.

The amount of Major Arcana here tells me that this person is likely very spiritually gifted, they might not be consciously aware of this.

This person is kind of a go-getter. Once they decide they want something, nothing’s getting in their way.

There are some conflicting energies here because as happy and carefree as they are, there’s an equal amount of pain and hardship. This is someone who’s faced a lot of hostility, so at first will be fairly guarded. They love the idea of being in love, but have difficulties opening themself up to the reality of love. It’s not all bad, they are making an active effort to heal and not let past heartbreak hold them back.

With the Magician and High Priestess facing each other, this is someone who is likely very in touch with their spirituality. Not only are they able to trust their intuition, but they also have everything that they need to follow it. Once they have a gut feeling about something, whatever it is, they will trust it more than they’ll trust you, and be right 90% of the time.

They are very compassionate and probably are used to giving more than they take, which gets them taken advantage of. Part of their growth is going to be finding a balance in this aspect of their life.

This is someone who values family and most likely wants some kind of family unit, whether that be having children or pets.

The month of May might be important, it could be when you meet or one of you could be a Taurus or a Gemini.

How You Can Recognize Them:

Ace of Cups, 3 of Pentacles r, 8 of Wands, 2 of Swords

Page of Cups, Justice r, 5 of Cups, 7 of Clubs

King of Pentacles, 10 of Cups, Strength r, 2 of Diamonds

2 of Pentacles r, 9 of Cups r, Queen of Wands, King of Diamonds

Death, The Hierophant, Page of Wands, 9 of Spades

Sensitive

Peaceful

There’s still time to change your mind.

One of their prominent characteristics is their sensitivity. This doesn’t mean that they’re crybabies, they are just very mindful of everybody's feelings. This paired with what we learned about the painful parts of their past probably makes them a little insecure. This insecurity is only a problem when it comes to relationships. They may come across as very confident and flirty, but as soon as it moves past that they start clamming up and getting nervous. It could be bad enough that they have a hard time believing that you actually want to be with them.

They invest a lot of time into their projects, whether work related or personal. It’s likely that they struggle with finding a work-life balance. This is someone who needs to feel productive at every moment of the day. They keep themself busy so that they don’t need to be alone with their thoughts. This isn’t someone that knows peace. It is something they’d like to experience, but they don’t know how to. They have too many thoughts and can’t quiet their mind, their inner-demons get the best of them at times. This isn’t something they express outwardly though, everyone around them probably sees them as someone who, while busy, is fairly laid back. They need a lot of guidance here so if you’re someone who meditates, this could be something you help them with.

It’ll be easiest for you to recognize them based on their sensitivity and active lifestyle. They will be extremely helpful to their friends and family, and would drop everything to be there if needed. They are also, surprisingly down-to-earth.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Pile 5: Hawk

Who They Are:

5 of Cups, Judgment, Queen of Wands, Queen of Spades

Knight of Wands r, 10 of Wands r, 5 of Pentacles r, 3 of Diamonds

7 of Cups r, The Fool r, 10 of Pentacles, King of Spades

2 of Swords r, 9 of Cups, 3 of Cups r, 3 of Spades

The High Priestess r, 3 of Pentacles, Magician r, 9 of Diamonds

“You’re my everything.”

You need to hold yourself to more reasonable standards.

This is someone with a lot of pain, they are overwhelmed and feel defeated. I’m getting the impression that it has to do primarily with work/co-workers. It could be that they put a lot of themself into their work and seem to always get passed up for promotions, or they could have even been recently laid off. They’re very ambitious and intelligent, so if they did get laid off, it would be a big hit to their ego. Alternatively, they could have almost reached a long-standing dream, only for it to fall apart at the last second.

Your soulmate has a lot of fiery passion that they don’t always know what to do with, so they turn everything into a competition. The thing is, they’re only competing with themself. They’re always trying to be better than they were yesterday, even when it’s unrealistic.

As passionate as they are, they can be very patient when it comes to getting what they want. They know that not everything can be rushed, even if that’s frustrating to them. They try to avoid making reckless mistakes, but sometimes this can lead to them not making decisions in a timely manner.

They value family and friends greatly, this could be the most important part of their life to them. They’ll test you to see if you can gain the approval of their loved ones. If you don’t, they may begin to have second thoughts. This is a soulmate though, so you’ll likely be very compatible and win everyone over with relative ease.

How You Can Recognize Them:

5 of Pentacles, The Moon, 4 of Swords, 5 of Clubs

King of Pentacles, Judgment, 5 of Swords r, King of Wands r, 7 of Diamonds

2 of Swords r, Daughter of Pentacles, 5 of Pentacles r, 3 of Clubs

Temperance r, Son of Wands r, High Priestess r, 7 of Swords r, Jack of Clubs

6 of Swords r, The Tower r, Page of Pentacles r, 5 of Hearts

You are not seeing clearly

Hesitant

When You meet this person, they will be coming out of a very rough period of their life. They are going to be at the start of their healing journey and they won’t have a lot of time or energy for romance. They’re likely very hard on themself, they don’t want to be seen as weak so they don’t express negative emotions. This is something they have to confront in order to heal.

They are going to be in a complicated headspace, there’s going to be difficulty separating the past from the present, and there’s not a lot of balance between their spiritual and physical lives. They either reject the spiritual to embrace the material world, or neglect their physical well-being and focus solely on their spiritual self.

You know how some people use their trauma as an excuse to inflict pain on others? This person’s the opposite of that, everything they’ve gone through has made them a patient, compassionate person. This will probably be one of the first things you notice about them, how kind they are. They are also very dependable, they’ve experienced going through hard times alone and don’t want anyone else to feel like they have to.

Overall, they come across as a very good human being, but there’s an underlying tiredness to them. They might be dealing with a little bit of brain fog, so at times they’re slow to process the world around them.

#tarot #tarot reader #tarot reading #tarot pick a card #tarot decks #tarot cards #tarotblr #oracle decks #oracle cards

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reputayswift · 2 years

Note

Your reblog speaking of perfect first drafts made me go into breakdown mode! How about people that do write almost perfect first drafts? Fic writers I follow and say they wrote 10k words in a day and then polished it in 2 hours and they’re ready to POST something ??? For people to read ??? And it turns out pretty great ??!? How do they do that??? It literally depresses me, maybe because English is not my first language (or I let myself believe that’s the reason), but it takes WEEKS for me, working on a 5k words draft almost every day, and I still think it’s flawed and keep editing after I posted... I love writing, it’s the only time I feel like I’m accomplishing something in life, which is stupid but whatever... I don’t know if I’m really slow or a weird perfectionist, sorry for venting like this ohmygod. Anyway I so understand Shizuku crying after pouring her heart out on that draft she wrote, I believe we do have gems inside of us but I also wish it were easier, or that I didn’t feel like it’s easier for everybody else except for me.

IF YOU FIND OUT LET ME KNOW LOL!! I’ve been really struggling with that “it’s easier for everyone but me” feeling too so unfortunately I can’t tell you for sure how to beat it, but I can tell you you’re far from stupid or weird 💜↓

Writing, at least in the way I view it, is already translation! You're taking thoughts and feelings and images and trying to pin them down with just the right words so other people can see and understand it — it’s a lot like drawing that way. That already feels restrictive in your first language (I always feel like I'm "settling" by using words to express myself), so writing in English is naturally going to contribute to a longer drafting time — you're translating twice!

Now as someone who only writes in her first language and ALSO takes forever (note how long it took me to respond to this lol), I can tell you that the importance you’re placing on your work is also contributing. You see your writing as an extension of yourself. No shame in that, that makes you a writer! But it also makes imperfection and criticism more devastating. Because writing has the potential to be perfect until it’s written and published, you go back and edit and edit hoping to get closer to it. The fact you can identify areas of improvement after posting shows that you’re learning and growing and becoming an even better writer, so don’t chastise yourself for feeling the urge to edit. BUT ALSO (and this is very much a “do as I say, not as I do” recommendation ;)) if you want to be a faster writer, you have to apply what you’ve learned from your past mistakes to your future work instead of endlessly picking at your current work.

You know that Uncle Iroh quote? “Pride is not the opposite of shame, but its source. True humility is the only antidote to shame.” Changed my life, genuinely. I always thought being extra critical of my work made me humble. But really, it’s more akin to shame. Like you, I feel like writing is the key to really accomplishing something, and expecting myself to always put out perfect work is pretty prideful isn’t it? I don’t hold other people to that same standard, and I suspect you don’t either, which may be why you see others’ day-long work as great while feeling your weeks-long work is unpolished. When we let go of the expectation that our work will be 100% every time, it’s easier to put our work out there as it is and move on to other projects.

Now this is all from my personal reflection and experience, but I hope you can take something away from it 💜 Writing is hard! And regardless of how long it’s taking you, you should be proud of yourself for doing it!

#anon #ask #asks

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rahleeyah · 3 years

Text

This last anon you answered got me thinking about why so many of us keep going back to twitter, even when we openly admit to feeling better after taking long breaks, or call it toxic or are affected by w/e the drama of the week (day?) happens to be. I'm sorry if this seems out of place, but since this is neither the first nor second time you bring up these issues, I figured I might as well share my thoughts here with you.

I can only speak from my own experience, so I'm sure what I'm about to say doesn't apply to everyone. I'm sure a lot of people manage to find great friends over there and enjoy the best that twitter has to offer. In fact, most days I feel like I do a decent job at filtering what I pay attention to over there. But still, there are days, those really bad, depressing, 'the world sucks and I just wanna escape it for a bit' days, when I feel myself being pulled into whatever bad spiral is going on at the moment. Yesterday was one of those, tbh, and I had to stop and ask myself why? Why do I still feel the need to keep going back to a site that more often than not leaves me feeling anxious and upset?

The answer isn't very flattering, tbh, and I might regret sharing this here, but I realized it's not the tweets or the likes or the mentions I'm craving. It's just, you know, somewhere to share my love for these characters/shows with other ppl like me. And that's where y'all tumblr ppl come in and say "why, join us over here where it's calmer and friendlier and slower." I believe you, Leah, because your blog is the perfect example of that. It's such a pure, honest representation of the very best sides of fandom, and you know it's true, since you're always drowning in asks lol. But, damn, it's not quite for me... Maybe it's bc I'm not much of a visual person, so gifs and pictures don't really grab my attention for long? Or, more likely, it's bc it takes time and dedication to shape a blog, and the sheer anxiety I feel every time I decide to put anything out into the wild west that is the internet makes it much easier to do so in short bursts of 280 characters or less. Idk...

Whatever the case may be for other twitter users who, like me, keep using twitter even when it makes them anxious, I have to believe that at least a few of them share my desire for connection. And it sucks that I've been there for months, and the 'friendships' I made are superficial at best. But from the little I gathered from observing other users, many many people feel alienated or left out while 'everyone else is friends with each other'. Some people really are, probably, but it's really hard to tell when we're all 'besties' forever reacting to the latest piece of news that just dropped, be it real or fabricated, don't ya think?

I'm sorry for this rant and for how long it ran... I guess I just wanted somewhere to go a bit more in depth about the seemingly neverending chaos, what with the way it often ends up making it's way to your asks, regardless of your advice to just. not. go. there.

---

This is a submission from @unusualcliches

First I want to thank you for sharing this with me friend. I'm really glad you felt comfortable enough to come here and talk bc it's important that we have places where we can say what's on our mind.

And I wanna apologize, bc I was sort of flippant with my comment about staying off Twitter. I wanna make it very clear I don't hold anything against the people who prefer to use it and I'm not actually recommending that no one go there. Everybody is looking for different things and has different ways of engaging and of course people are gonna have preferences, and those preferences are gonna vary from mine, and that's ok!!

We all want community and Twitter does offer that more easily. I said this in a moment that got edited out of the podcast but I can't imagine trying to get started on Tumblr now. I have made some profound, life changing relationships here, but that took work, and time. I've been shaping my blog for over a decade. Starting from scratch now feels like a herculean task and I totally understand why this platform wouldn't suit everybody's needs.

I am not gonna advocate for people continuing to use social media if it's negatively impacting them, if it's generating feelings of anxiety or isolation, but I am also not gonna judge you or anyone for continuing to do so bc we all do things we maybe shouldn't, or that aren't good for us, big or small, all the time. It's human. It's understandable. We see something that we want, that maybe could be good for us, and we keep coming back in the hope that even if it wasn't good to us the last time, it will work out now. I'm not gonna fault you for that.

Twitter has the ability to connect people quickly, easily, openly; it is much, much easier to find people there. But bc it moves so fast, it's hard to make those connections last. There are people there who post these pictures and share these stories and have clearly found their in-group and that's wonderful! But it's rare. It's rare here, too, rare anywhere; it's a needle in a haystack, really, finding the person or persons out of such a big group who will be your people. You send a lot of DMs that don't go anywhere before you find the one that sticks. But bc Twitter is so public, I think we see more of those connections than you see here on Tumblr. On Twitter it's so visible, you see "oh it's possible to find your people here, look they did it" but you don't see all the times it didn't work out. Like Instagram; you're seeing the shiniest parts of people's lives and not the work it took to get there.

All this to say, it's completely understandable that you feel this way, and I won't blame you for going back even if it's burned you before. It's an act of hope, really. I make the choice not to spend a lot of time there, but that's my choice for myself, and it's not up to me to make that choice for anyone else. I hope you do get something good out of it.

#asks #s.vu #e.o asks

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wasteland-photography · 3 years

Note

I’ve recently taken up fallout 4 based photography after getting inspired by your blog.

However, I’ve noticed that my photos experience a notice dip in sharpness and quality if I edit them (such as to make more centred). I suspect it’s probably a compression issue but wondering if you’ve encountered similar problems

Hey, thanks for the ask! I'm absolutely delighted to hear that someone was inspired by my work, and I would love to see it sometime if you'd ever like to send it my way.

Unfortunately, just about any time you alter or save an image in a JPEG format (the default for Steam screenshots), there will be some compression. Most websites such as facebook, instagram, and tumblr also tend to compress their images upon upload as well, which can be pretty frustrating at times.

If you're doing any heavy editing or screenarchery, here are some of my personal recommendations:

Avoid saving or altering the same image multiple times - instead make each save a new file, such as "screenshot-2, screenshot-3", ect. This will also allow you to compare different versions, or revert back to an older version if necessary.

Saving the image as a PNG, rather than a JPEG - this will result in less compression. However, the downside is that the file size will be pretty big, so it will take longer to upload, and can sometimes take longer to load on slower computers.

If you are doing anything to alter the original size of the image such as zooming or cropping: I highly recommend trying to keep the image the same aspect ratio. Or at least try to stick to one of the more common aspect ratios (such as 16:9, 4:3, ect). This seems to reduce some of the quality issues when uploading to a website.

If you still want to use JPEG, I recommend using Photoshop (which is fairly easy to acquire a legitimate copy of, recommend using a VPN just in case) and choosing the "High" quality option when prompted. I personally use around 8, and haven't seen any noticeable drops in quality.

Bumping up the in-game shadow/lighting quality or using an ENB can also be useful, as it can help "soften" some of the sharper edges, and reduce pixellation.

I also rely on a lot on in-game mods such as iHUD, which will allow you to hide or toggle menu elements such as the compass when not in use, and reduce the need to crop or edit many images almost entirely.

As stated previously however, any kind of alteration will still affect the image quality in some way. For that reason, recently I have been trying to avoid zooming or cropping my images almost entirely, and have mostly been relying on Photoshop to remove any unnecessary or distracting elements. But I know that's not an option for everybody.

Anyway, sorry for the text wall, but I hope this helps! Note that I am only speaking from personal experience, and am hardly a professional. So if there's anyone out there who knows more about photography than me, feel free to correct me or add to this post.

#i apologize for the super late response #apparently tumblr decided not to notify me of this message #faq #anon asks #asks #2021 #wasteland-photography #film workshop

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timextoxhajima · 4 years

Audio

Playlist Feels

*SHORT SERIES

Part 1: Church

Part 2: Do It For Me

Member: i’ve typed this name so many times in the last two weeks but i’m not tired of it: LEE JUYEON

Genre: SMUT AGAIN BEC WHY NOT

A/N: i really need to consider drinking holy water and bathing myself in it after i’m done with this series i feel like i’ve sinned more writing this than ANYTHING else i’ve ever written

“no mercy”

“am i expecting to be running into you in some random hallway in new york?” lee juyeon calls out to you just as you get into a cab at the airport.

the sun was shining but the wind was cold, the airport already slightly desolate because everybody who was on your flight was already long gone. you had just been stuck in the building making phone calls to your agent who was supposed to pick you up, but didn’t.

you turn and let his eyes roam up and down your body with a look you don’t recognise. they looked like they yearned for you, but in a different way.

but your relationship with this man was purely sexual.

you didn’t even know his name until he announced it over the PA in the plane.

“i’m afraid you’re not going to, captain,” you give him a weak smile, the effort needed to speak to him drained you in that instant. “i’m staying here for awhile.”

the cab driver loads your luggage into the boot, the sudden, loud ‘bang’ startling you a little. your attention returns to the pilot, who looked a little less than satisfied with your answer.

“it was fun while it lasted,” you pull open the car door and throw your bag in. “thank you for beating me at my own game, and making me want to make sure nobody else does.”

you give him one last smile of mischief, one that he probably found familiar, before getting into the car. the door shuts on your pull, and you give the driver the address to your hotel.

you shoot the pilot one last glance just as the vehicle moves off, and that was the last time you saw him.

~~~~~~~~~ ONE YEAR LATER ~~~~~~~~~

“there’s no way in hell that’s her,” sunwoo leans into hyunjun, arms crossed tightly across his chest, eyes fixed on you. “are you sure you didn’t pick up the wrong person at the airport?”

hyunjun winces in disgust at his false statement. “i picked up the wrong person? you were literally standing right next to me when she walked out of the arrival hall.”

“maybe we swapped her out for someone else.”

“well, i mean...” hyunjun looks at you and rubs the back of his neck in hesitation. “at least now we know she can take more vodka before she passes out.”

you down your nth shot of vodka, but it doesn’t faze you at all. despite the loud, annoying music, you hear every single word that sunwoo and hyunjun just said. though your chest and throat were on absolute fire, anybody could give you a script or document and you’d still be able to edit it like you spent your entire year in new york doing.

“and on top of that,” you finish your glass of water to reduce the burning in your throat. “you don’t have to worry about me throwing up.”

you raise a shot at them and lift an arrogant brow. sunwoo purses his lips and looks on as if he was watching a violent movie, leaning back into hyunjun while you down the shot like it was nothing.

working in new york was so satisfying, both career-wise and personally. you were doing nothing but what you loved the entire year and you came back at least two positions higher than what you were when you left. not to mention the experience and the connections you’ve made at it; it was one that was unrivaled.

all those meetings and bonding with your colleagues and people of similar career backgrounds came drinking. you drank so much in new york, you were worried you’ll never be able to get drunk here, and it seemed like the case.

there was only one thing that stuck in the back of your head like an annoying tick, and that was your complete withdrawal from your sex life.

the reason?

you were afraid you were going to be disappointed with anybody you slept with after lee juyeon.

the man who beat you at your own game.

so much for making sure nobody else beats me at my own game.

“even if you don’t get drunk, the amount of alcohol you’re ingesting is going to kill you,” sunwoo’s eyes were half-hooded, but his face says nothing less than worried.

“i’m not going to get killed by alcohol, what a shitty way to go,” you snort and take another shot, shifting yourself out of the seat to drag your friends to the dance floor.

your arms were already stretched out in a bid to grab onto sunwoo, but someone walks straight into you from the side.

the weight pushes you off balance and you stumble a little, but you recover quickly only to realise that half your shirt was soaked in what looked like... cocktail?

“shit! i’m sorry--”

“no, it’s fine! no problem... dude.”

your eyes lock with your assailant, and something similar to nostalgia rushes through you.

“juyeon.”

the name rolls off your tongue the moment you process those eyes.

those eyes that kept you away from hooking up with anybody the entire year you were in new york.

he was just as shocked and surprised as you were, if not more. there was a glimmer in his eyes, and you could almost sense that he already knew you weren’t the same person you were when you slept with him. he started trying to read you, and you couldn’t believe that fate decided the two of you should meet again.

“i--”

“is there anything i can get you, sweetie?”

your eyes dart to look at the bar girl who’s come up with a rag. she gets on the floor and starts wiping, and her boobs looked like they were going to fall out of her tiny tube top. juyeon opens his mouth agape and grabs onto her shoulders, pulling her up from the floor and telling her it’s fine.

you watch with confusion as a flirtatious look overcomes the bar girl once she notices juyeon’s face. you suck your lips in between your teeth, eyes trailing juyeon’s arms as they grab onto the bar girl and continues convincing her that he didn’t need her to get on her knees. you notice sunwoo and hyunjun’s eyes glued to the situation like they were watching television.

the moment drags longer than you’d expect, and given the way he was looking at her now, you were almost on the verge of breaking out into scoffs.

is he trying to make me jealous by flirting with her?

you wipe the tiny smile off your face and turn to the booth, sliding yourself in and completely ignoring the flirt session happening outside.

“sunwoo,” you down another shot. he tears his eyes away from juyeon and the bar girl, and gives you his attention. “do me a favour and make out with me.”

he immediately frowns, obviously refusing to comply. “what? no.”

“it’s not gonna hurt,” you turn and grab a fist full of sunwoo’s shirt in your hand. the bold movement causes sunwoo’s eyes to shoot wide open, and you could feel juyeon’s eyes on your back as you leaned into your friend.

“you’ve lost your fucking mind--” you don’t bother with his words, and you shove your lips onto his, deliberately letting out low moans while sunwoo tries his best to keep up with your aggressive kissing. you open one eye, completely unfazed that you were eating sunwoo’s face, and you see hyunjun trying his best not to laugh at sunwoo’s demise.

releasing the cotton of his shirt, and you lift your arms in attempt to wrap around his neck, only to be abruptly, almost violently, torn away from sunwoo by your waist. a familiar hand wraps around your arms and pulls you out of the booth.

juyeon comes between you and the booth, his eyes now dark and filled with anger. you smirk and wipe the corner of your mouth with your thumb, looking past him and at sunwoo, who had your lipstick smudged all over his face.

“what was that for?” he nearly growls, and his tone pokes a funny bone in you. it felt great to be in complete control, knowing that you weren’t drunk and you no longer had to live with a double personality.

“for fun,” you lick your lips and glare up into his eyes. you swore you heard something snap, and within a flash, he gives you a smile you haven’t seen in a long, long time.

“you want fun?” he turns around and points to your handbag, cuing hyunjun to awkwardly hand it over to him. juyeon fumbles in some pocket and pulls out a name card, leaving it on the table behind him. you could never forget his grip on your skin, so when the skin of his hands wrap around your wrists, you struggle to stifle a low chuckle.

“i’ll show you fun.”

juyeon drags you away from the booth, and you watch with arrogant glee when sunwoo and hyunjun nearly snatch for the name card. their eyes widen in disbelief, and from afar, you could see the airline company logo on it.

the end-of-winter iciness in the air sent chills down your spine, the only thing balancing the shivers out was the warm hold he was providing to your wrists over your long-sleeved top.

he pulls the door of the passengers’ seat for you, but an idea pops up into your head. so before he could get it completely open, you slam it shut, and you raise a cocky brow at him.

anxiety fills your veins when you remember it’s been a year you’ve slept with someone, and it just so happened that he was the last person you slept with. without reading his expression, you pull him over to the drivers seat and pull open the door, hands finding his shoulders to push him in.

you could tell he was a little confused, but he quickly grasps onto the situation when you crawl on top of him and close the door. the impact shakes the entire car, and your legs somehow find enough space to straddle his lap.

you look down, hands already on his shoulders, and you let yourself digest the sight of his jeans hugging his thighs and his already-growing crotch.

“missed me?” you smile widely at him, feeling somewhat strange knowing that it wasn’t your drunk self talking. he blinks in pleasant surprise, his hot palms dragging themselves from your knees to your thighs and over your black leggings.

if you knew you would be seeing him today, you wouldn’t have been in this fit. white long-sleeved top, maroon skirt and stockings. it only made everything harder.

“i can’t tell if you’re drunk or you’ve changed,” his hands travel under your skirt and harshly squeeze the flesh of your ass. your chin angles itself upwards to the roof of the car, and you lick your lips from the sudden movement, returning your attention back to him.

“oh, i’m not drunk,” you press your left hand flat against the back of his neck, slowly leaning forward. “but that makes it all the more fun.”

the small space forces the two of you to be pressed against each other like you were trapped in a shrinking box, and you could already feel the heat between the two of you while your tongues were already fighting each other.

his hands were so hungry that they wandered up and down your back, occasionally caressing your waist, then squeezing your ass, before dragging it back up to play with the hook of your bra over your shirt.

his tongue was already trying to force itself between your lips, and you struggle a little to find some kind of memory of how to win this game, but you fail. he shoves his wet muscle into yours, pushing your tongue back in your own mouth.

you could already feel the air seeping out of your lungs in the midst of the aggressive making out, and you couldn’t even begin to anchor the sensation of his growing manhood you were sitting on.

he senses your lack of breath and pulls away, a string of saliva dragging itself between your tongues before it finally snaps.

“you are different,” he huffs, dragging out movements under your skirt and tugging on your stockings so he was sure you were well aware of what he was doing. “but you’re not any better.”

his words strike a major chord in you, and you gasp in genuine shock when he rips your stockings. the sound of the cloth tearing apart brings that demonic smile to his lips.

the cold air kisses the skin of your ass and your inner thighs, and you glare at him when you realise the tear was pretty fucking extensive.

“good,” he slips a finger under your underwear from the back and finds your wet entrance. “you’re annoyed.”

you grit your teeth in a bid to hide the hiss that was about to escape your mouth when he shoves a finger into you. the sensation naturally pushes you to lift yourself off him by your knees, but he only shoves you back down onto his finger by digging his nails into your hips.

you lean forward, feeling your own neediness pool around his finger and you rest your forehead into his collarbone. your nails find his shoulders, and you choose to zero-in your attention on his neck.

he pushes a second finger into you, and you mask your moan by sucking on his neck. a growl rumbles in the back of his throat, and he picks up the pace in return.

you pull away from his neck, admiring the little spot you’ve made on him in revenge for tearing your clothes. but he captures your lips with his, his fingers still pumping in and out of your south.

he abruptly breaks away and shoves your juices into his own mouth, the sight sending you over some crazy edge you forgot even existed. his dry fingers find your chin and pull you back towards him again, and he invites you to start another power fight between your lips. your palms were pressed flat against his chest, and you could feel his arms fumbling around his own waist, and the sound of a belt coming undone was like music to your ears.

you’ve long lost the fight in your mouth and he explores your taste for the second time now while his hands anchors around your hips. you feel his fingers push your underwear aside again, and not a second passes before you feel his wet, throbbing muscle under you.

“is this your definition of fun?” you huff between harsh kisses, the sounds of your lips detaching and attaching again filling the car.

“oh, no,” he smirks and slowly pushes you down on him. soft whines of pleasure escape your throat despite the consistent kissing, and you feel him stretching your walls again for the first time in one year. “this is just the appetizer.”

the feeling of him completely filling you was so overwhelming, you couldn’t stop yourself from breaking the kiss and looking down. you press your forehead into his shoulder, allowing yourself some time to get used to his size.

not because he was monstrously large or anything, but because it’s been a year.

you could feel him throbbing inside you, and despite the lack of movement, you were already going crazy in your gut.

not only did you miss the feeling of sex, you missed the thrill of having him inside you.

his hands find the back of your thighs and lift you up slowly, before pushing you back down into his lap. it sends intense drills of shock and bliss throughout your entire body, and you start to whine and mewl when his hands start to roll up your top.

he pulls you closer to him and the pushed-up material of your shirt covers your view of him, but he doesn’t let you rest. his hands manage to unhook your bra to loosen the cups around your breasts, and the feeling of his tongue swirling around your hardening tips throws your head back.

his hand harshly grips on your ass again, commanding you to move.

you couldn’t help but to feel like the biggest loser alive when you start to move your hips according to his request, and he starts sucking on your breast like a newborn baby.

the entire car was jerking along with your little bounces and grinding, and you could feel the vibrations of his moans and groans from his throat and into your chest. it drives you insane and you throw your head back in complete ecstacy when you start to smell nothing but sex.

you start to feel the glass rod forming in your core, and it felt so unrealistically nostalgic for you. your whines and mewls become sharper and more desperate, and he notices your pace was slowing down because you were much more closer to your high.

his fingers dig into the flesh of your waist to hold you down, and you can’t help but to continuously grind your hips around his manhood. he pulls away from your breast and returns his attention to your lips, lewd noises leaving his throat and into your mouth when your grinding only gets messier and out of rhythm.

the glass rod shatters, and you bite on his lip by accident when your orgasm hits, the unfamiliar, but blissful sensation spreading through you. after a few thrusts in a bid to help you ride out your high, he hugs your waist and pulls you off his lap, the emptiness finishing with a soft ‘pop’ when his soaked shaft springs out of you.

he holds you close to himself, your knees propping you up while you hug his head to your chest.

you hear his strained moans and grunts, so you assume he lifted you up because he didn’t want to come inside you.

his chest rises and sinks against your stomach, and you could feel your own wetness slowly trickling down the inside of your thighs, soaking the ripped edges of your torn stockings.

his arms were still wrapped around your waist, and you rest your chin on the crown of his head, trying to catch your own breath.

after you calmed down, you lean back against his firm hold and he was careful not to let you sit on him again. your eyes lock with his, and you were stunned to note that he didn’t look like he just had car sex.

his eyes were wide open, and they looked even clearer than before.

“what kind of a fucking demon are you?” you tiredly scoff, dragging your thumb across his lower lip.

he flashes his demonic smile at you again, eyes digging into your soul with no tinge of mercy.

“the kind that isn’t done with you.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Part 4: Heaven

A/N: after this series i’m packing up and leaving

#timetohajima #juyeon smut #the boyz smut #the boyz juyeon #juyeon #lee juyeon #im about to cry

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alpacaparkaseok · 4 years

Text

7 Secrets <pt. 8>

GENRE: Soulmate!au BTS!

WARNINGS: slight anxiety

WORD COUNT: 4556

Ok ya’ll here we go! I’m excited for all that’s coming. Who’s your fav couple so far?

The conference room has transformed into a restaurant, the tension from earlier having dissipated as everyone goes about giving hilarious accounts of their bonding.

“Of course I was angry!” Kyung-soon is red in the face but laughing.

“Why on earth would you be angry about that? I fought tooth and nail to be able to go first! I couldn’t wait a second longer to meet my beautiful soulmate!” Jin defends himself, viciously taking another bite of his food. It’s enough to send us all back into a fit of laughter.

Kyung-soon looks at Namjoon with a doubtful look in her eyes. “Be honest, Namjoon.” Over the space of the past few minutes we’ve decided to abandon all honorifics, which I greatly appreciate. I was bound to mess them up at some point. “Did he really want to go first?”

Jin shoots Namjoon a death-glare, and Namjoon hesitates a moment before plucking up enough courage to go against his brother. “No, he was nearly in tears because he was so scared.”

If it wasn’t chaotic before it definitely is now. Jin nearly launches himself at Namjoon, but he’s caught between that and defending himself from Kyung-soon’s wrath. The rest of us simply drink in the moment, finally not so nervous as before.

Namjoon looks at me pleadingly from across the table as he evades Jin’s verbal attacks. “Are you not going to help me?”

I shake my head no, my cheeks starting to hurt from laughing so hard over the past few minutes. “It isn’t my problem that you just threw Jin under the bus!”

Jin is in the process of fiercely agreeing with me when Namjoon stands up from his seat and drags it over to my side of the table. I’m suddenly not laughing anymore when he settles down beside me.

“Oh Namjoon-ah, so bold today!” Hoseok says, his heart-smile on full display. Neither one of us says anything, instead choosing to attack our food.

“Yah, who’s next?” Himari comes to our rescue. “Oh, Seohyun. What happened with you two?”

Yoongi looks up to Seohyun with wide eyes. No doubt he doesn’t want the finer details to be discussed, but I can also tell that he won’t stop her if she wants to talk about it.

“Nothing much,” Seohyun shrugs. “We just bonded. That’s all.” She shuts down any further questions, and I hope that she catches the small smile of gratitude on Yoongi’s face.

“You two are a nice match,” Jimin points out. “It’s cool to see it, from this perspective.”

Yoongi coughs. “Alright, Hobi. Take it away.”

“I see what you did there,” Himari jokes. She looks to Hoseok expectantly, the two of them already chuckling at the memory of their bonding.

I glance at Namjoon to find him already looking at me again. This is turning out to be a habit of his.

“This should be good,” I whisper to him as Hoseok starts. Namjoon nods vigorously.

“Definitely.”

“Well, as you all know,” Hoseok gestures to the boys, “I was so excited that I nearly bumped Jin out of his spot as first to go.” This merits a pointed cough from Kyung-soon which Jin blatantly ignores. “Apparently Himari was too, because we couldn’t even make it through the entire bonding process without having to take a seat!”

“Wait,” Taehyung interrupts, “You couldn’t stand through it?”

Hoseok laughs, shaking his head. “No, how could the rest of you?!”

“Only you, Hobi. That’s amazing.” Taehyung giggles, looking over to Ichika. “I wish I could do it again.”

Ichika raises her eyebrows at the boy. “Speak for yourself, I thought I was about the throw up. I can’t believe you weren’t nervous.”

Taehyung shrugs. “I’ve seen the docufilm, haven’t I? That helped a lot.” The other boys nod in agreement.

“Did it actually help?” Minsuh speaks up for the first time since we entered the room. “We didn’t even take it that seriously, we weren’t sure you guys were even going to find out about us.” From the look on Jungkook’s face I’m guessing that she hasn’t spoken a lot today, and he’s taking in every single word. Minsuh is definitely one of those people that takes a while to open up. When she does though, she goes a million miles an hour.

“I think that it was better that you didn’t take it seriously,” Hoseok says. “That way you seemed more natural. It definitely helped to not just be walking into this blind. Although I can’t say the same for Namjoon.”

I turn to look at him, but he keeps his attention on his food. His brow is furrowed, making it look as though he’s angry at his meal.

“It wasn’t that bad,” Namjoon says. No doubt he can feel my gaze, his ears are slowly turning red. “We still have to watch the last episode!” His head shoots up to look at me. “Do you know when it will be edited and ready to go?”

It’s my turn to furrow my eyebrows. “What are you talking about? I don’t know anything about it.”

“It’s the last episode, it covers the last week. So when you come back to Seoul and find out about meeting us.”

“Namjoon is an avid fan,” Jin teases. “I think he’s watched it three times over.”

“Not true! Just twice.”

“Twice by yourself maybe, but then there was the time we all watched it together! So yes, three times.” Jimin jumps in on the teasing, and I laugh at the accusations. “Leave it to Namjoon to have to study it like a textbook.”

“No way, you watched it three times?” I stare at him dumbfounded before folding my arms on the table and burying my head in them. “That’s so embarrassing. I really didn’t think you’d watch it all.”

The room bursts into yet another fit of laughter at my behavior, but all I can think of is the horrible first impression I must have left on Namjoon. I rarely played along like the other girls, made it a point to avoid the cameras, and didn’t try to really keep up on my logs like I was supposed to when I was back in the states. He probably hated me when he watched them.

I feel a gentle pressure on my arm from Himari, which is followed on the other side by Namjoon. Instead of the comforting words I was looking for, I can practically hear the grin in Himari’s voice.

“I told you to show your face on camera more often! May this serve as a lesson for you. Always listen to me.”

I glare but realize she can’t even see me. Slowly I raise my head, Namjoon assessing my face with a worried look that only subsides when he realizes that I’m not that upset. Just embarrassed.

“You’re never going to let me live this down, are you?”

“Not a chance.”

Jimin has moved on to a different topic now down the table, explaining how awkward he used to be in front of the camera. I almost don’t notice Namjoon leaning in closer to whisper something to me.

“You know, I really didn’t think it was that bad. They were just making fun of me because I watched it almost constantly over the last few weeks.”

I turn to him, trying and failing to glare. “How long have you known?”

He looks down at his hands. “3 weeks.”

My eyebrows raise on their own accord. “Only 3 weeks? And you guys were ok with meeting us already? That’s hardly enough time to...wrap your mind around having a soulmate.”

Namjoon shoots me an incredulous look. “Well, yeah, I guess it’s hard to get. But we all knew that it was a possibility when they ran the tests a few years ago. Why wouldn’t I want to meet you as soon as possible? If I’d had it my way I would’ve had you flown out 3 weeks ago.”

I don’t even know what to say in response to that. Especially not when Namjoon still hasn’t dropped his gaze. I wait for a moment longer to see if he’ll go back to his typical embarrassed state but he doesn’t. I can’t read what’s behind those eyes of his.

“Namjoon-ah, let the girl breathe!”

We both jump at the comment from Jin and turn to find everybody’s eyes on us. Himari gives me an amused smirk which I can’t return since I’m still reeling from a second ago.

“We’ve been waiting for you guys to tell us about your bonding, but if you’re busy…” Himari starts, and I’m quick to jump up.

“Nope! Nope, not at all.”

“Korean, please,” Seohyun hums and I realize with a start that in my flustered state of mind I couldn’t even come up with the right response.

“Right,” I mumble, sinking back into my seat.

“May I just say, I’m not surprised that Beth took the longest.” Seohyun continues, eyes glimmering as she looks at me. “Your maknae is the fastest? Ours has a losing streak.” The other girls chuckle, and I don’t miss the wink Seohyun sends my way.

“Alright alright,” Namjoon cuts in. “What do you want to know? I feel like there’s not a whole lot to say.”

“What did you do? Who initiated? What were your first thoughts of each other?” Yoongi says, clearly not at all opposed to hearing every little detail even after being so clearly closed off about his own experience.

Namjoon sits quietly for a moment, and is just about to speak when a soft knock sounds at the door. Mr. Bang pokes his head in, eyes scanning the room until they land on me.

“Beth, I’ve got Webtoon calling me demanding to put you on the phone. Sorry to interrupt, but could you take the call?”

I frown but stand up. “Sure, that’s fine. Where’s the phone?”

“Your phone is still in the recovery room from earlier.”

“Gotcha,” I turn back to everybody. “I’ll be back in a second.”

Namjoon is halfway out of his seat, looking unsure of his role here. “Do you want me to come with you?”

The thought of him coming with me and it suddenly being just the two of us seems like too much. Especially at the train wreck speed everything is going already. I shake my head, giving him a smile that I hope masks my thoughts.

“No, you stay here. Tell them about what happened. Make us sound cool!” I yell over my shoulder as I head out the door. I can hear the echoes of everybody’s laughter as I make my way down the hall and eventually follow a little sign taped up on the wall that points me in the right direction.

↔

The call doesn’t last long, I just had to confirm a few last minute decisions before next week’s webtoon episode is released. Normally I wouldn’t mind one bit, happy to chat with my editor Ji-hoon Gwan. He’s the same that was there the day I found out about Namjoon being my soulmate, but as far as he’s concerned I’m part of BigHit’s translating team.

I can’t help but notice the feeling that comes as a result of putting distance between my soulmate and I so shortly after our bonding. It’s not painful, but I can literally feel the pull of the bond working to shorten the distance.

It’s easy to find my way back to the conference room, this time with my phone. I’ve grabbed Namjoon’s as well from where he left it in the recovery room. Following the tug from the bond, I’m just outside the door when Namjoon’s phone lights up with a notification drawing my attention.

“Oh my gosh,” I breathe out, nearly dropping his phone in the process of trying to adjust my hold on it to be able to see the screen better.

There I am. Right there, on his lock screen. It’s a screenshot from the documentary, taken just over a year ago at the airport. I’ve got my suitcase trailing behind me, a cheery smile on my face as I wave goodbye. I remember the moment clearly, Himari had just told me to wave goodbye to Namjoon, meaning the camera. I did so a bit sarcastically, completely aware of the fact that I was decked out in sweats and a baseball cap. I look happy though, the camera crew did a good job of finding a good angle.

I let out a shaky breath, trying my best to get a hold of my emotions before I go back into the conference room. I lean up against the wall, resting my head against it as I take a moment to calm my racing heart.

The flurry of emotions subside after a moment, but I can’t set aside the fear that Namjoon may have created a version of me in his head that doesn’t match up with who I actually am. I want to be everything for him, but I’m not foolish enough to entertain that thought for long. I gave up a long time ago hoping that Namjoon would be open and happy about the idea of a soulmate, but now that it’s looking like he might be...I don’t even know how to begin with any of this.

I’m absolutely clueless and still terrified. My heart is trying to leap out of my chest, because all it sees is the fact that I want him. All of him. Anything he’ll give me, I want it. I’ve wanted him for years now. And judging from the evidence I hold in my hands, judging from his comment earlier about how badly he wanted to meet me, he wants me too. But it’s that wanting that terrifies me, because really, deep down, I know that I don’t know him at all. And he doesn’t know me.

It takes a long time for me to reach the surface again, my thoughts are heavy and weigh me down as I swim through them. Slowly I can start to pick out snippets of the hushed conversation inside, and I realize with a start that it’s Namjoon who’s speaking.

“...I’m telling you guys, I haven’t slept in days. I kept thinking that I would wake up and it would all be a dream. But suddenly today happened, and I saw her, and she was real. Can you believe it? I have a soulmate, and I can already tell that she’s incredible.”

I choke back the tears that threaten to spill over as I hear Namjoon’s reverent tone. Clutching his phone to my chest, I breathe in deeply. Oh boy.

“That’s so sweet,” Kyung-soon’s voice drifts through the door. “Trust me, Namjoon. Beth is happy too. She hasn’t allowed herself to really be happy with this whole soulmate thing, always keeping herself in check. I don’t know why, but that’s just the way she is. So don’t be discouraged if it takes her a while to open up. I mean, she finally opened up to me just this week, the day before we found out about meeting you all. It was hard for her-”

I roll my shoulders, trying to make it look like my whole world isn’t spinning too fast for me, and barge inside before Kyung-soon can start going off about how lonely I’ve been feeling. The last thing I need is my soulmate looking at me like I’m a pity case.

Gliding through the door I notice the solemn looks over everyone’s faces. “Please tell me that you made us seem cool,” I say, everybody turning to look at me. Namjoon gazes up at me innocently, his cheeks a little red. No doubt from his heart-to-heart.

I mean, I leave these people alone for 10 minutes and they’re already starting a group therapy session.

He smiles a little, and I force back the sense of fear that rises up in me again. I just want to love you, I think, but I’m so afraid.

“Our spot as the cool ones is secure,” Namjoon reassures me. His smile falters a little as I take my seat. “Now it’s Jiminie’s turn.”

As soon as everybody’s attention is turned to the opposite end of the table, Namjoon places a light hand on my shoulder.

“Are you alright?” He whispers. I sigh. Of course he would have picked up on my change in stress levels. That change going from being chill to contemplating how far away I could run away before anybody noticed my absence.

All I can do is nod, the close proximity finally soothing the pull of the bond but doing nothing for the strange ache in my chest.

Namjoon doesn’t settle for a meager nod. “You sure? Is everything ok with work?”

Right, I’d nearly forgotten the point of my absence in the first place. Which reminds me of what I hold in my hands.

“Oh! I-I brought our phones back from the recovery room.” Inwardly cursing myself for my stutter, I pass Namjoon his phone. “And yeah, everything is fine with work. Did you feel something when I left? The bond?” I quickly try to change the topic as Namjoon’s eyes land on his phone which lights up with the movement.

“Huh? Oh, yeah. Yeah, I could feel it. It was...strange.” He keeps looking at his phone, or more specifically, me. He clenches his jaw in thought.

“Beth, you didn’t happen to notice…” he trails off for a moment, looking guilty. I remain silent, trying to talk myself into telling him the truth instead of feigning ignorance. “Um, my lock screen? Is that what this is about?”

I put my guard up a little too late, and Namjoon scrambles to explain himself upon seeing my expression. Which I’m sure reflects the uncertainty swirling inside me.

“I’m so sorry Beth, that was probably so weird for you. I just-I don’t know…” I can tell that he wants to say so much but he quickly realizes that we’re not alone in this room. “I swear, I didn’t mean to make you feel uncomfortable. I guess I don’t have a valid excuse. I’ll change it-”

“No, don’t change it.”

Namjoon looks puzzled as he had already opened his phone to change the lock screen. It makes me feel a little better to see that his home screen is a photo of a concert, the sea of army bombs looking beautiful.

“You don’t want me to change it?” He cocks his head, trying to look into my eyes which I keep firmly pointed to his phone.

“You don’t have to. It’s cute.” Biting my lip I sigh out my nose, still avoiding his eyes. “I just wasn’t expecting it, I guess. I’m so sorry to make you feel bad. Everything is just happening so quickly today. It’s my bad, I’ll be fine. Don’t worry.”

I turn back to the rest of the table before Namjoon can launch himself into another string of apologies. He huffs out a sigh at my side, locking his phone again, thus keeping me as his lock screen.

Jimin and Aera are in the middle of explaining how Aera got the hiccups during their bonding. He reenacts how his body shook with each hiccup, bringing about a round of laughter.

Namjoon doesn’t speak again, instead choosing to scoot closer. I feel a little tug on my sweater sleeve, then Namjoon is grabbing my hand and slipping it under the table where nobody can see.

He doesn’t say a single word, just holds my hand as he runs his thumb over my knuckles. Slowly but surely, I begin to relax. Somehow without communicating a single word, he’s managed to soothe my worries. At least for now.

When I finally pull my focus away from Namjoon’s hand in mine I realize that we’ve moved on to Taehyung and Ichika.

“So cute,” Taehyung gushes. Ichika gives him a lopsided grin which he returns with a boxy one. “Sorry I cried on you.”

Ichika chuckles, shaking her head. “I’m just glad that we made it. Nobody appears to be too scarred from the experience.” From the look they’re giving each other I can tell that they must have already had a good conversation earlier. It’s clearly being continued silently, and Taehyung gets up to stand behind Ichika’s chair, resuming his position from earlier and wrapping his arms around her.

“Your turn Jungkookie,” Taehyung states before leaning down to hum a melody that Ichika closes her eyes to enjoy.

Jungkook fidgets about in his chair, Minsuh looking no less awkward. Jin gives the younger boy a nudge.

“You two were the fastest,” he says, trying to give Jungkook somewhere to start. “Did it feel fast?”

Jungkook shakes his head at the same time Minsuh nods. They look at each other a little startled.

“Did it go fast for you?” Jungkook asks, and I can’t help but swoon a little at the kindness in his gaze.

Minsuh nods. “It felt like I barely had enough time to blink before everything hit.”

“Huh. It felt like a really long time for me. It was pretty intense though, wasn’t it?”

“Yeah, it was.” The two of them are looking at each other like they’re the only two in the room. It would appear that the intensity of their bond has yet to fade.

I’m desperately racking my brain to come up with something to say to break the growing silence, but the door swings open before I get a chance to come up with something.

Bang PD slips through the door, laptop in hand. A couple of managers trail in behind him, greeting us as they head to the front of the room.

“Everybody doing alright?”

“Oh, we’re great. Did you come for food?” Jin asks, resting his chin on his hand. Mr. Bang smiles at the eldest member of the group.

“No, I already ate. I’m actually here to discuss everybody’s plans for the next few weeks. And yes, I know what you’re thinking, Beth.” I straighten up when he mentions me. Mr. Bang observes Namjoon and I, his eyes drifting to where both our hands disappear beneath the table. “Don’t worry, I’ve been in the process of figuring everything out with Webtoon. You’re on official BigHit business for the next few weeks.”

“Are you trying to rid me of my job?” I raise my eyebrows at him. Bang PD only smiles at me, already used to my personality.

“Absolutely. Really, Mr. Gwan didn’t seem too sad to lose a few weeks with you, maybe you should look into that.”

The boys audibly gasp, Namjoon’s grip on my hand tightening as he looks at his boss with something akin to horror. If only he knew that we’re just getting started.

“He probably knows better than to go against you. After all, we all know just how much you’ve missed me. Wasn’t it just a few months ago that you were lost in the states and I had to come pick you-”

“Alright everybody, let’s get down to it!” Mr. Bang turns away from me and I smile in victory. A few months ago Mr. Bang came to the states on vacation, but his car wasn’t available at the airport. I had to come pick him up, which led to an eventful afternoon involving lunch and an angry pigeon.

One of the managers heads over to the white board, mapping out a rough itinerary. It takes me a second to translate the writing in my head, but I get the general gist. If anything, I understand the wide-eyed expressions of my soul-sisters and the boys as they wait for our reactions.

“Wait, what?” Himari whispers, but everybody hears it.

Hoseok smiles sheepishly at her from across the table. “Is this ok?”

I turn to look back at the itinerary, looking past Namjoon as he turns to assess my reaction.

Okinawa Island, Japan

4 days

4 episodes

“We’re going to Japan?” Ichika asks. She looks hopeful, it’s been a while since she’s gone back.

“Only if everybody is ok with it,” Taehyung says, squeezing her shoulders.

“I’ve been discussing this with the boys ever since they found out,” Mr. Bang shoots a glare to Jungkook and the boy smiles innocently back at him. There must be a story there. Come to think of it, I still don’t know how the boys found out in the first place. “And I really feel like we’ve always done things a certain way and we shouldn’t stop that just because there’s suddenly seven new faces around here.”

“What are you getting at?” I ask. I’m pretty sure Namjoon can feel my rapid heart rate through our joined hands.

Mr. Bang takes a deep breath. “You shouldn’t be a secret. You already have been for 3 years, and I’m sorry that you had to hide for so long. However, you will no longer be kept in hiding. Of course, when you decide to share your...relationships with the public is completely up to you. For the time being however, we’ve decided to go about this in a certain way.”

He pauses, allowing us a moment to let everything sink in. I look over at Kyung-soon, who’s viciously chewing her lip. Jin has his eyes trained on her, clearly terrified she’ll veto any idea that comes up.

Ichika once again speaks up. “It says 4 episodes...are you meaning to film us in Japan? Like some sort of Bon Voyage?”

Bang snaps his fingers. “Exactly. BTS has always been content oriented, geared toward the fans. We’ve been over this many times before, but you will have to share the burden- and joys- that come with being in the spotlight. In order for your relationships to have a smoother transition for when you decide to go public, we’ve decided to provide some content for the fans. This is our proposal. 4 days in Japan on Okinawa Island. There will be separate quarters for the boys and girls, and we will have a variety of activities for you all to do. Not only for the content, but also to allow you all some time to further bond before you’re thrown back into real life.”

It’s silent in the room. Namjoon takes up running his thumb along the back of my hand again, an action I didn’t even realize he’d stopped.

4 days. All the soulmates, on a beautiful island in Japan. Sure, there will be cameras, but isn’t that something I’ve anticipated? I’ve known for a while now that where Namjoon is, cameras will be sure to follow.

Once again, the girls slowly look to me. I’ve never understood our dynamic that we have, but somehow I manage to pull my thoughts together and answer Bang PD’s unspoken question.

“When do we leave?”

It’s like the breath of life has been breathed back into the room, all the boys letting out a sigh of relief. Namjoon gives me another squeeze, grinning slightly at me. I give him a look that says, Remember how I said this was all moving so quickly? Yeah, still feeling that. You’re going to be the death of me.

Bang PD grins at me, and I can already feel my stomach drop before the words even leave his mouth. “How does tomorrow sound?”

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sxveme-2 · 4 years

Text

blueberry pancakes // bucky barnes

MASTERLIST

Description: A single mother. Juggling being a mom, a full time pediatrician, and a difficult ex who believed now would be the best time to finally be a father. A soldier ripped out of time. Ex-assassin turned superhero. Learning how to balance a new domestic life with handling demons of his past, while facing the trials of the future. a love story began over something as simple as chocolate chip pancakes with hidden blueberries.

Disclaimer: I do not own any original Marvel characters! All canon plots and canon characters belong to Marvel Comics and Marvel Studios. This is an original work. You may not publish it anywhere else

Status: Edited

Note: Takes place after endgame. I have elected to ignore Tony's death and Steve's leaving. Did not happen. Quick Reminder! My works are only published here, AO3 and on Wattpad, thank you.

Chapter Five: The One with the Burnt Pancakes

Warnings: N/A

Word Count: 2516

Coming out of a divorce unscathed was more uncommon than its counterpart. Typically, a bit of baggage attaches itself to one or both parties. No matter whether or not divorce rates are through the roof in today's modern era, it still hurt more than words could describe. Especially when it's due to an affair. It creates this sense of unworthiness, and as though you weren't good enough. And when the pair has a child, it makes it ten times more difficult. Knowing that you'll have to break it to the child that their parents will no longer be together, and that they will most likely spend more time with one in comparison to the other.

But, when your child already has a bit of distaste towards your partner, it can make the blow a little softer. Sure, every mother wants their child to have a relationship with their father, other mom, etc. Whatever the situation is, parents, want that. They want to be able to see their child's face when they see their ex-spouse, but sometimes, there's nothing you can do about it. Especially when your ex never put in the effort, to begin with.

Above all, your perception of love changes. and that's exactly what happened to Lily. She lost all belief in herself and didn't believe she could ever find someone who would love her, along with the baggage that she carried alongside her. And that broken heart that she has yet to mend, and honestly, she wasn't sure if she'd ever find someone who could help. To cup warm hands around the two halves and hold them together until they combined once again.

Other things she deemed impossible, was her sitting in a kitchen with the avengers. Earth’s mightiest heroes. The people that destroyed an entire army. travelled to space. Some even having been ripped out of time and thrown into different roles and periods. These people had stories people couldn't even dream of, lived lives people only wished to be able to experience. And here sat Lily, a single mother of an 11-year-old boy, who lived in a domestic area, and worked as a pediatrician. She was minuscule in comparison to the Gods and soldiers that sat around her.

"So, is Hunter’s father around?" a soft voice asked, an accent dripping from the words. It had pulled Lily out of her thoughts of astonishment, as she tried to wrap her head around what was currently happening.

"Hm? Oh, no," Lily spoke, her voice as soft as the gentle ripple of a pond, while she sipped the coffee they had given her. Glancing up, a few of the superheroes looked at her with inquisitive eyes, wondering where he may be, or if he even was to be anymore, "We uh, we divorced four years ago."

"I'm sorry to hear that," the girl continued. Lily had placed her as Scarlet Witch, or Wanda Maximoff. Hunter adored her. He ranted and raved about how cool her abilities were and how she could probably take down an entire army by herself if she wanted to, "He's cute. I've always wanted kids."

Lily nodded along as the conversation continued around her. She stayed as silent as a sleeping lamb, her green eyes glancing around as she tapped her fingers against her coffee mug. She wasn't sure what they wanted her to say. It had been proven time and time again that Lily was the farthest from a talker. Deep inside of her mind, the little voice of self-doubt had convinced her that no one cared about what she had to say. That the only reason people even spoke to her, to begin with, was because it was polite. But she's also been told that the world around her found that shy demeanour endearing, and mysterious. As if she held secrets behind those sealed lips when in reality, Lily was scared that if she spoke, she'd create secrets. Letting the world in on the pain she hid, that she kept locked away in a vault deep within her mind. protecting herself from being destroyed again.

"...So if you ever need a babysitter," Wanda’s voice sang again, yanking Lily away from her deeper thoughts once again, as though the two were tethered. the young blonde's attention perked up as the young girl continued speaking, "I'm your girl."

Was the Scarlet Witch, offering to babysit Lily's eleven-year-old? As in, seriously? Like to pick him up or come down from upstate New York to deliberately take care of him? If it weren't for the fact Lily rarely left the house, and if she did, it was with Hunter, she may have considered the idea. But Lily wasn't one to go out. The noise that came along with the idea of partying or going out on the town always got Lily's heart beating at a much too fast pace. If she was going out, it was to gen's cafe, or with three glasses of wine down and a whole bottle to go. The world was loud and intimidating, and could easily crush Lily's fragile heart and mind with a simple touch. And where would that lead her? Nowhere good, that's where.

"Oh that's sweet, but I don't typically go out, and when I do, he comes with," Lily stated, lips forming a tight smile as she ran her finger along the circular hole atop her mug.

"Really? A girl that's as beautiful as you must get tons of guys and go out on dates. and I see no ring on that finger," the infamous Tony Stark teased while shifting his weight to look at the blonde, "unless there's already a lucky fella."

A laugh of almost disbelief escaped through Lily's full lips as if the idea of Tony Stark calling her beautiful was too good to be true, "Oh no. my best friend tries but I don't date. Already have my hands full with work and Hunter."

"Where do you work?" Steve's voice now chimed in, pushing off the counter he leaned on as Bucky worked away, staying silent. He hadn't spoken a word to Lily since Steve walked her through the threshold of the kitchen, merely a gruff hi before returning to the feverish work he was doing on the pancakes. It was as though he was trying to make them perfect.

"I'm a pediatrician at Mount Sinai Kravis Children's Hospital down in Manhattan," Lily answered, her eyes averting from looking at any of the intimidating people around her. Why were they so interested in her? Why did they seriously care so much about her personal life? She just brought Hunter here for a tour, not an interrogation...was this what people did? Like...they wanted to learn more about her? It didn't make sense, she was pretty basic. There was nothing special to her, Lily thought.

"Oh, that's awesome. I have a few-"

"SHIT!"

The large outburst caused everybody to immediately turn their attention to where it came from. Behind the counter, Bucky was waving smoke away from his face that seemed to be billowing from the pan on the stove. He burnt the pancakes. Lily felt a small smile tug at the corners of her lips as she watched him throw a towel at the counter, his face turning a crisp shade of red, like a cherry. The moment his eyes landed on her though, his entire body lit up in a hue of pink it seemed. He grew flustered, biting down on this ever so soft lips he had. Lily was only human, she couldn't help but avert her eyes down to the thin layer of skin. And as if on cue, Wanda let her voice ring through the kitchen.

"Damn it, Barnes! I told you not to cook, and you decide to challenge your abilities in front of our guest?" The ginger exclaimed while standing from her chair, going to help the built man clean his mess.

A few of the others in the room whined, and Lily guessed they had been waiting for a bit to eat. She felt a twang of guilt deep within her, as though it was her fault. But it really wasn't, she wasn't the one making the pancakes. no, she was merely answering the personal questions they all seemed to have for her, as well as constantly glancing at the hall or behind her to see if Hunter was on his way back. Instead, he was now outside with Sam, looking at all of the different artifacts and things that weren't able to be kept inside of the compound.

"You much of a chef, Lily?" James Rhodes (Warmachine, she reminded herself), asked. No matter the amount of mental effort it took, Lily couldn't help but allow the tinge of rose to decorate her full cheeks. They seemed to want to get to know her, and she felt almost...accepted? No, maybe more so welcomed, by these beings of immense power and ability. She allowed her shoulders to relax, and her grip on her mug lessened.

"Nothing impressive, but I do know my way around a kitchen," she responded, tilting her head to the side, causing her blonde locks to dance across her shoulder, "Most nights, I try to make homemade meals for Hunt and I. It's important for a child's development." she finished but noticed how all of their eyes were glued to her. Raising her left eyebrow ever so gently, she let a giggle escape from her throat, "but sometimes I give in and order pizza."

"You should help Bucky out, he's never been the best cook. Got used to boiling everything in the forties, so he makes a mean hot dog," Steve teased, sauntering over in all of his Captain America excellence, "Anything else? Completely lost on him."

"It's a good skill to have. But difficult to master, I suppose." Lily shrugged, crossing her legs over one another as she rested her elbow on the glass table, cupping her chin as she sipped the hot liquid in her cup. She couldn't seem, however, to take her eyes off of the culprit of the burnt pancake smell. The way the muscles in his neck rippled whenever he clenched his jaw. How his metal arm glinted as a small stream of light entered through a window, creating a bright reflection. How his scruff along his chiselled chin seemed to be a bit overgrown underneath.

Her mind began to wander momentarily, a gentle and soft vision dancing itself into her brain. Him sitting on a chair in her bathroom, Lily sitting comfortably on his lap, facing him. His eyes sleepy and his hair unkempt. Her skilled and nimble hand resting on the side of his face as she trimmed underneath his jaw, getting those areas he seemed to miss. His lips parted as he seemed to slowly drift off again, as though Lily's gentle hands were willing him to...

A hand waving in front of her face snatched Lily out of her odd fantasy land. She cleared her throat and looked around her, eyebrows knitting together in confusion, as though she had been paying attention to the whole conversation she just missed. Holding her lips inside of her mouth, Lily shifted once again in her seat, attempting to play it cool as the blush that had formed on her cheeks seemed to grow rapidly.

"Sorry, could you repeat what you said?" she asked, her voice weak as her eyes shifted to look at the man behind the counter once again. She couldn't help it...he was beautiful.

"I said you should help Buck out making the pancakes. Most of us haven't eaten, and if you're as good as you say, maybe you can help." Steve grinned, a knowing glint in his sky blue eyes. The way he looked at Lily, as though he could see inside of her head, sent a shiver down her spine. The idea of anyone knowing where her mind just wandered was basically mortifying for her. Being such a conservative person, the idea of that getting out? Yeah, no.

"Oh no I shouldn't...I'm positive he's capable of making pancakes." Lily chuckled, her voice cracking halfway through. This caught everyone's interest, and Lily had to hide her face with her mug as the dark liquid slid its way down her throat.

"He isn't. We don't normally let him in the kitchen. C'mon Lily, show us whatcha got." Steve continued to pry, leaning back in his chair as the others encouraged the entire idea.

Lily's head turned back to where Bucky stood, an almost pleading yet bashful look gracing his perfectly sculpted features. Just the way his eyes seemed to call out for her, was enough to allow the eldest Osborne to give in to the peer pressure of her new acquaintances. That was something Lily believed to be impossible, being friends with these heroes. These people that laid their life on the ground multiple times, saving her and her son by protecting the world around them. She was in debt to this group, everybody was. They've kept them protected for countless years. But how would one even begin to thank them?

"Okay okay, I'll do it," Lily mumbled, finishing her drink before pushing herself out of the chair that probably cost the same amount as her dog. She pulled a hair tie from her wrist and securing the blonde locks at the nape of her neck as she gracefully floated towards the kitchen. Glancing around, she couldn't help but let out a laugh at how expensive the items around her were. Sure, she didn't live in a house with run-down appliances, but these were top-of-the-line, high-end, see-on Food Channel things. A far reach from Lily's budget, "Well, first of all, Bucky, you need to turn on the fan."

After preparing everything to ensure not only safety but also to optimize space and time, Lily turned towards the man she had just moments ago daydreamed of. For a moment, she found herself lost in those steel-blue eyes he had. As though he had captured the moon and made them his own, adding a tinge of the blue from the sky above. How with every flicker across her face, a story was told. The pain and suffering he had endured etched into the dips and creases of his face, especially around those beautiful orbs. A part of her wished that the other members of the group were gone and that she could grip the sides of his face and kiss those lips he kept licking. His tongue darting out to wet them, creating a slight chapped ring around the pink layer of skin.

"Hey if you two are done gazing into the eyes of each other and looking like Hollister models, the rest of us are hungry." Starks’s voice rang, snapping Lily out of the trance the ex-soldier had put her under for a few seconds.

"I have no idea what you're talking about, coke can," Bucky muttered while turning his gaze away from Lily's and focused on washing the blueberries, "I'm just cleaning fruit."

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