#(edgy and owning it over here!!!!)
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kismetconstellations · 4 months ago
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@sockdooe, the ignorance of this "analysis" is melting my brain.
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What are your thoughts?
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rawliverandgoronspice · 1 year ago
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devotion. (Impa's main theme from my ongoing Zelda fan animatic project, Thralls of Power)
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cockroachpr1nce · 17 days ago
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don’t know where my fuckn headphones are and i can’t get out of my own head fml i need something to drown out the noise
#my night was awesome until insomnia hit and i ended up left alone with my own thoughts#kind of just realizing how many people on this site are really immature and do absolutely no work to manage their symptoms#instead they just make assumptions and it feels kinda unfair like#i’ve /been/ saying that if we’re mutuals and you have a problem with me we can talk and i’ll be chill about it#and even if that ends in you blocking me - i’ll take that L like whatever#but no. people continue to believe things that are not true about me with no fucking basis for these beliefs and its like#brother. you are getting pissy with me over something you literally made up.#that’s not really my fault?#anyways getting real tired of people on here kinda treating everyone like shit and then being like ‘no it’s okay because of *insert#diagnosis here*’ like actually it is not fucking okay#some of you need to grow up a little and start living in the real world#you are not that important. okay? like. nobody is thinking about you as much as you think they are#i feel like a withered old man over here trying to talk to toddlers about emotional regulation and communication and shit#like everyone can keep pretending i’m the problem but at least i fucking communicate when i have an issue#just. tired.#some people on this website are so lame. like how are you gonna be a grown adult acting like an edgy high schooler#anyways to clarify once again before my retarded stalker starts sending that ‘cockroachpr1nce is talking about you’ bs to people’s inboxes#again. i doubt you know who tf i’m talking about bro. because it ain’t got nothing to do with our partners abuser or any of his friends.#hop off my dick. i’m tired#/nbh
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renthony · 9 months ago
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You won't get media with messier, more nuanced, more realistic queer characters if you keep flying off the handle the second a fictional character has sex, does drugs, swears too much, or acts vaguely like an asshole.
You won't get more diverse queer media with wider stories if you can't handle it when queer artists make art that is raunchy, crude, edgy, and gross.
You won't get more diverse queer media if you shut everything down the second it does something you, personally, get squicked out by.
You will never get more diverse queer media if you contribute to the way queer media is picked apart, raked over the coals, and held to unreasonably high standards.
You will never get what you want if you keep tearing queer artists down for their weird experimental art instead of learning how to say, "this isn't for me, that's fine, and I'll be over here in my own space."
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grimdarling69 · 5 months ago
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Another deaged Ellie and Dan, but Danny was reincarnated as Damian Wayne
Danny Damian because he was Damian now, wasn't he? He remembers now the Fentons, the GIW, Sam and Tucker, jazz. He wonders if they could have also followed him here. A part of him longs to see his fraid again, but are they his fraid still? He was a new person. Son of The Bat and Heir to the Demon Head. Something Dami he remembers reminding people of. If only Sam could see him now, he knows she'd love that. "Who's edgy now?" He can picture her saying. He can almost see Tucker laughing so hard he'd fall out of his seat.
Crack
The sharp sound of the thunder brings him to the present. He looked over at his clock, 3:00 A.M. The witching hour he can hear Ellie tell him with a mischievous smile on one of their flights around Amity Park. She loved to drag him and Dan sometimes Vlad if he was feeling friendly. Dan, his future evil self tormented by the deaths of all his family and friends, so hurt he got Vlad to rip his human half out so he didn't have to feel the pain. Ellie, his clone, created by Vlad to be the perfect son, too bad she was a daughter. Looking down at his stomach where their cores are now incubating, he couldn't help but wonder if Vlad had anything to do with this.
He shook his head as if that would rid himself of that thought. Vlad was a real fruitloop,but he would never purposefully endanger Dan or Ellie. Vlad, in his twisted and weird ways, did love them in his own ways like kidnapping and keeping him hostage to save Ellie. He had forgiven vlad for the desperate attempt to save his daughter, but incubating Ellie and Dan's cores would make him their father now, too. Ew, coparenting with Vlad does not sound like a fun time. He glanced down and lifted his shirt hesitantly. If he focused on his stomach, he could see a faint blue and red glow emanating from his stomach. Red, Vlads' color, he thought distantly. Hopefully, it didn't mean much. As if signaling him, the envelope they had carried with them to him fell off the bed carried to the floor by the slight breeze.
Lighting lumineating the bedroom, making the crisp white color shine for just a second. He tentatively reached down to grab it. He was being a baby. He was a trained assassin from birth, and his fear trained beaten out of him a long time ago. Some part of him whispered his father and Richard's teachings of being brave but not without fear.
He paused. Father would want to know everything. His past life, Ellie and Dan, the ghosts, being a halfa. He wouldn't understand, Richard would try to, but not even he could never really understand. He couldn't subject his babies to that. He couldn't live with the threat to being ripped apart molecule by molecule. His father's lack of emotional intelligence certainly would not help young halfas. He was fourteen again the age he was killed in his first life. The age he started facing ghosts from another dimension.
He started younger in this life. Killing younger, he learned to fight his whole life. Jazz would hate that. Jazz... he wondered if she was alright if she survived the attack... no, there's no time to think of that right now. He ripped open the envelope( like a band-aid, Richard would remind him), and he noticed Vlad's familiar fancy fruitloop writing immediately(he had fancy fruitloop writing now, instead of the chicken scratch Jazz chided him over). So he was right about one thing this had vlad all over it.
Dear Daniel,
Though I understand you might not be Daniel when this letter finds you. I have been reincarnated into another life as I believe you have as well. My new name is Alexander Luther. I own a corporation called Lexcorp. I unfortunately can not change the name according to my board. The idiot lot of them.
He snickered at that. His smile dropped immediately. Vlad was Lex Luthor, the archnemesis of Superman. Jon would most certainly not like this. He forced himself to read on before he spiraled further.
I regained my memories after an experiment went wrong. I know how original. My new incarnation was able to open a small portal that grew in size, and eventually, somehow Danielle and Dan fell through. The portal then exploded, and I regained my memories. Unfortunately, it destabilized their clone bodies. I couldn't grow working bodies in time, and eventually, I had to hope they could find you. I hoped somehow that the yeti doctor would have imparted some of his strange knowledge onto you that might save them.
Vlad, no Lex still wrong. Vlad was somewhat right about that. During one of his all things ghostly lessons from Frostbite, he told him of how in the old ages ghosts often incubated their ghostlings. A protective measure back when magic and spirits were more prevalent. He didn't really understand it back then, and he doesn't understand it much now, either. Apart from the fact he was doing it, he supposed. What if he did something wrong and he lost them? He doesn't think he could live out his half-life if he lost them again. He needed to get to Vlad, and quickly too so they could start building a new portal to the infinite realms.
If this letter finds you. Come find me immediately at these coordinates. I've gone deep underground to escape my new archnimesis's suoer senses. I've m started research on a new portal, but I'll need your endeneering skills. This world is severely lacking in ectoplasmic science and engineering. I am once again forced to start from scratch on my own. Once we get the portal open, you'll need to go straight to The Far Frozen.
It's as if he's reading my mind, I think jokingly.
P.s. One of my experiments may or not have regiven then my new DNA in an attempt to restabilize them.
Only Vlad.
Well, it looks like they actually were going to be coparenting after all. This was going to go great.
I sigh and lean my head back down on my pillow. He committed the cords to memory before lighting the letter on fire with the lighter he kept in his bedside drawer. Point to assassin training. Jason would be proud. He supposed he could stay for a month or so before leaving, which would give him enough time to get away or think of some kind of mission to give himself. He shoots up. Todd had died and came back. He was a revenant. He couldn't stick around if he were to visit he'd know something was wrong immediately even if he didn't understand it.
He sprung out of bed quickly, but quietly, his foot steps perfectly silent despite his rushed mood of packing a bag. He packed a few pairs of clothes and lots of hidden weapons, some snacks he kept hidden for that should keep him fed on his journey but leaving any sentimental things behind. He glanced longingly at his sketch pad, but Vlad was most likely under the water judging by the coordinates he was given. Who knows if it would survive.
He checked the pack, making sure he got all he needed. He promptly checked it again. Twice. After deeming it sufficient, he willed himself to open the door. He mentally cataloged everyone in the manor. Pennyworth was most likely still in Father's room, making sure he actually listened to his insructions. Richard and Todd in Bludhaven and Crime Alley, respectfully. Cain and Brown in Hong Kong. Thomas was sleeping after his dayshift.
Everyone accounted for except Drake. He was most likely using Pennyworth's attention on Father to work cases. He just had to take the risk. For his ghostlings, for himself, Vlad. He crept down the hallways. He was opening the grandfather clock in record time. He went slower this time. He would use his powers, but his father had supernatural wards of all kinds in the cave. Who knows what they did. He was also admittedly trying to save his little energy for his voyage on the open sea. Light snoring hit his ears as he peered around the corner.
Thank ancients.
Drake was sleeping at the batcomputer, still in his Red Robin suit sans mask surrounded by his poor choices. Empty coffee cups and files spread around. He would still need to be quiet, Drake was a light sleeper, as was everyone else in his family. He grabbed the keys to his bike quickly, sneaking by. If he wasn't ditching his bike at Gotham Bridge, he would have disabled his trackers. He checked the gas and made sure he could make it. That's when he made his first mistake.
Putting the gas jug back down, he accidently hit another of one of his siblings' tools to the floor. He tried catching it without success, but it fell anyway, the loud clang echoing. Mistake number two.
Shit.
"Huh? What's happening?" Drake arose sleepily rubbing his eyes.
He froze. Mistake number three.
"Damian? What are you doing down here?" His eyes landed on him, and he spoke confusedly with his voice heavy with sleep or lack thereof.
He panics. He's blaming the pregnancy hormones on this.
He runs.
"Damian!" Drake responded to his dead sprint with his own. "Stop!"
He reaches his bike, and he turns the keys and prays. Luckily, it comes to life. He fumbles with his helmet it would hide his tears he needed it. who knows if he'll ever get to see them again. He shoots off down the tunnel. Flicking the cave door open remotely.
Another bike rears to life behind him. "Damian wants going on?" Drakes voice echoes in his ears. He can almost taste the concern in it amplified by the helmet. He ignores it and accelerates. He ignores the returned acceleration behind him.
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Tim has no clue what made Damian panic enough to run away. He quickly ran to his own bike while swearing. Damian is already gaining distance on him. After another attempt at getting Damian to calm down and talk, he calls the only person Damian would actually listen to.
He hopes Dick will forgive him for waking him at five o'clock in the morning on his day off.
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twisted-wonderland-but-gayer · 10 months ago
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A Well Deserved Grudge
Summary: You still hate them after their overblot
Notes: GN Yuu. Some based off some stuff from the light novel. Yuu is pretty evil in Jamils. General edginess that comes with angst
Based on this old post abt Yuu with scars • Part 2
Riddle Rosehearts
A familiar click of heels has you on edge. As they approach you turn around to face him, messing with some of the bandages around your neck from your last encounter. There stood Riddle, his confident stance dropping the second he meets your eyes. 
His usual piercing gaze filled with anxiety as the words he so wanted to say— needed to say— died on his tongue. He's such a coward without a rule book. He's even more cowardly under your scrutiny.
"What?” You deadpan at him and Riddle swallows, looking at the bandages on your neck and arms. He then looks at your face, covered in a few scratches from rose bushes.
“... I… am here to… ” His voice shook toward the end and he took a breath to steady himself. “I'm sorry Yuu. I didn't mean to hurt you.”
You merely raised a brow and fully turned to him. Riddle could see the gash along your neck that peeked through some of the bandages. A grim reminder on how his magic failed during his overblot. The expression you had on your face as the collar around your neck continued to tighten and cut into you haunts him.
“You’re apologizing?” A flicker of determination flashes in Riddle's eyes as he nods. 
“Yes. I know it's not enough but… I'm sorry.” The dullness of your eyes reminds the dormleader that this was far from enough to smooth things over.
“I do not forgive you.” He should have expected that, yet he winces still. What is he supposed to do in this scenario? What else does he say? There is no rule, no guide to what he has done. Deuce and Ace said that he needs to make things right, but how?
“... I understand. If there's anything I can do to earn your forgiveness, please–”
“I don't think there's anything you could do that makes this okay.” Your voice is dull as you pull at the bandages on your neck. “Shouldn't you be in the headmage's office fighting your expulsion?”
It was true. Crowley was to judge whether or not he was to be expelled for his actions. It scared him. “I… I am but–”
“Then go. We both know you won't be kicked out– Crowley doesn't have a backbone and your bitch of a mother will make sure you stay in. You want to ‘earn’ my forgiveness? Stay the hell away from me.” 
Riddle grits his teeth and closes his fist tighter. Emotions of all kinds surge through him. He's confused, he's guilty, he's angry, he's lost. 
Most of all, he's scared. Scared of your gaze, scared of how you hold yourself. Your eyes remind him so much of the ones above him he tries to please and they're boring into him with such disapproval.
“I don't want to see you around, get your shitty tantrums in check. Just because you lose your head doesn't mean others have to. Just go.”
By now you've turned away and started walking off. Riddle could only watch, unable to find the strength to move or say anything. It was probably for the better. He needs to go to the Headmage.
Jamil Viper
He hates this feeling. You have forgiven him, though and through, water under the bridge and he hates it. He hates how you shrug it off. He hates that you don't hate him. He hates this guilt.
He mind controlled you. You. A magicless and defenseless human who was already helping him. You who are in a position so similar to his. You who had no way to fight back. He kidnapped you, keeping you in Scarabia for days regardless of your own plans. If it weren't for your dorm ghosts feeding the fire fairies, Crowley would have cut off your food for the week.
Then he tried to kill you, and had the audacity to be angry at you for it. To add even more salt into the wound you were so kind with him afterwards. You didn’t seem to take it seriously. Take him seriously. Your attitude reminds him so much of Kalim which makes this even worse.
He hates your smile. He hates your attitude. He hates the way you have to walk because of your injuries. He hates seeing glimpses of the wounds on your abdomen from him.
Yet another reminder of his failures. How he hates someone that's not entirely to blame. How he hates someone that's overly nice. He avoids your gaze so often he doesn't notice the glints of satisfaction within it.
Vil Schoenheit
He could only stare at the prefect within the mirror. Their gaze so fixated on themselves and their new appearance they paid no mind to the hospital bed they should be laying in. He wants to lecture them to sit, lay back down and to stop sitting up, but he's sure they would break down if he did.
Blackened veins run along your body, your skin reddened and inflamed in random areas. Even with all the magical remedies the doctors have given you, the black tar like substance runs through you still. “Good going Vil. Really fucked that one up huh?” 
Vil’s eyes met yours in the mirror, he could see your face steel itself before you turned to him. Your eyes stood out against the inky scrawls of venom coursing through you. They were so cold, so angry.
“... I know this is something I may never be able to amend…” Vil starts, taking a breath. Fuck. Years of acting and hard work are lost on him. It is hard to keep strong when seeing how badly your own childishness, your own selfishness hurt someone this badly.
“I want to apologize. I know this is far from enough. I plan to not only cover any costs that may occur in your recovery, but to also offer my support in any way I can during your recovery.” 
Your gaze only hardens. "Bare minimum I guess…” You sniffle a bit as words slur. It was clear you were still inebriated. You weren't going to be the most logical right now, but that's fine. He will say this apology a million times over if it would make it right.
“... If there is anything you need..."
“Go away.” You sniffle again, wiping away tears. “Just leave.” Vil swallows and shuts his eyes for a moment. “I understand.” 
As he turns to leave the drugs in your system really start to kick in. “You… You really are a villain.” The words come out crude and harsh, no doubt you are speaking to hurt him. Yet as you turned away he could see your face in the mirror.
Scared. You were scared of him. You were scared and truly believed in what you were saying. And you weren't wrong. He is a villian.
Malleus Draconia
A mighty dragon places his glass heart in the hands of a human without their knowledge, and is enraged when the human breaks it. Except here Malleus broke it himself to protect himself from the possibility of the human hurting him first. Now he holds the shards of what's left and sees them stained not by his blood, but by yours.
A position he put onto you, his only friend. He does not even know if he has the right to call you that anymore. Not after his little stunt. Children of men do not deserve to be locked away in the dark, no matter how beautiful you were in it. They were to be free. Even if it hurt him. You and him could have been free together.
He looks at your expression. It still holds no fear, no anxiety, just as foolishly brave you were when he first met you. Instead it holds disappointment. Such a pathetic emotion that he would smite off anyone else if it wasn't you. 
“... You're really selfish, you know that?” You mutter and look away from him, as if not wanting to believe the words coming out of your own mouth. “Were we really friends or was I just some doll to you? Some obsession?”
A sniffle. “I wanted to be your friend…” Malleus hasn't the words to respond. He can only open his mouth then close it. “I know. I'm sorry. You made me so happy I wanted you all to myself. It's not an excuse, but when I thought I would be losing you, it was too much for me. I made… A very rash decision.”
There's silence. More deafening than the silence at his birthday parties growing up. “Is there any possibility you could forgive me?” It was a daring question, one he was afraid to know the answer to. 
“... I don't know, Tsuno. I think… I think I need some time to think about it.” You turn away from him and his heart sinks, the pet name does nothing to soothe his nerves.
He remembers all the times he's told you how his kind are born cruel and you would tell him that his actions have shown just how kind he could be. That him learning to be nice and overcoming his nature is more meaningful than anyone who was born that way. 
And he ruined that. He may not be able to choose his nature but he can choose his actions. He chose to hurt you.
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cripplecharacters · 10 months ago
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How to Support People with Facial Differences - the Face Equality Week 2024 Special
[large text: How to Support People with Facial Differences - the Face Equality Week 2024 Special]
Today is the 13th of May, which means that the Face Equality Week has just started. This year's theme is “My Face is a Masterpiece” which is probably my favorite sentence ever said about having a facial difference. Huge fan, should be used way more often in my opinion.
Because of this occasion, I would like to share some thoughts about Face Equality that I think are rather entry-level, i.e. you don't need to know much to execute these, but you can still support us.
Stop the stare.
I know it's fun to stare - or so I guess, at least - but maybe you shouldn't. Next time you see someone who has a scar or who's face does not move the same way as yours, just mind your business. We can tell when you're “discreetly” looking.
Don't call us deformed. 
Knowing how the people you're trying to support actually call themselves should be an absolute first step, but most people still fail here. Most of us don't appreciate being called “deformed”. I certainly don't. Say “facial difference”, or “disfigurement” if you must. It's 2024. Leave “deformed” to medical reports from the 70s.
No more “What happened?!”s.
If you aren't a doctor, there's a high-to-100% chance that it's none of your business. It's cool that you're curious - keep it to yourself.
Stop insinuating that we are ugly.
“Support people who are ugly!” isn't very supportive. I would say, not in the slightest. Say “people who don't fit the current beauty standards” if that's what you mean. 
Or, to go with this year's theme, “people whose faces are masterpieces” : )
Use critical thinking online.
Is the reaction photo actually funny, or is it just a person with a craniofacial condition? Is the meme actually a meme, or is it just making fun of a person with a facial disfigurement? Is body-shaming suddenly hilarious to you when the person shamed has strabismus? 
If the entire punchline is “lol they have a disability xd”, it's ableism. Plain and simple.
To go with the point above - your joke is probably not funny.
We get it! You can't help telling us how "you're going to hell for laughing" (which yeah, probably) and how we remind you of the ugliest character you have ever seen. I guarantee you that we heard it, and that you are behaving like an edgy middle schooler who hasn't "found out" yet. It's boring and annoying. Also ableist, but you're aware of that already if you're saying that you're going to hell.
Stop with the goddamn trigger warnings. 
We aren't “body horror”, we aren't “gore”, we aren't something that you need to advise your viewers to use their discretion over. Every “graphic footage: child with neurofibromatosis” and “#tw burn scar” is a sign of ableism and disfiguremisia. People with facial differences deserve to be seen. Ableds can survive seeing a person without a nose.
Do a basic reading on what disfiguremisia is.
New word! And an important one. It's a brand of ableism that intersects with more or less everything, and it means discrimination and hatred of people with facial differences/disfigurements. The bullying, harassment, endless name-calling, and microaggressions are all results of disfiguremisia. The ways in which everything is harder for us isn't some unchangeable rule of how the world works, it's just an extremely prevalent type of discrimination.
Understand that we are people.
I know, revolutionary - and yet impossible for so many people to get. We can be a visual representation of evil when it's necessary, we can be a feel-good inspirational story on a morning talk-show, but not much else, it seems. In reality, we are complex, we have our own lives, we can be happy and sad and have the same exact joys and worries that you have.
Hey, artists - facial differences don't make you evil.
Title stolen from a great essay by Lise Deguire (link). When's the last time you saw a positive character with a facial difference that wasn't inspiration porn? I mean a character that's not edgy, full of angst, a murderer, or a villain. Based on what you see in the media, you'd think that having a scar renders you evil on the spot, but in reality it just makes you loathe how artists apparently think you are like. It's boring, it's overdone, it's ableism. Stop doing this, and start noticing when it's being done. Point it out if your friend is writing their new villain to be an evil burn survivor. This kind of portrayal needed to stop ages ago, but tomorrow will be a great time as well.
Before you reply with “I've never seen this” - Darth Vader, Lion King’s Scar (subtle name, great thing to teach kids!), Freddy Krueger, Voldemort, we could be here forever. You're just not paying attention.
Pay attention to where we are not included.
As discussed, there are some places where you see us all the time. But where do you not see us?
Advertisements (unless it's for a scar-removal cream, of course). Fashion shows. Magazine covers. Romance movies where we are the main character.
We deserve to see ourselves in what's around us in the same way able-bodied people do. Trying to make it seem like we don't exist - that's deliberate. 
Interact with our art.
We draw, write, sing, act in movies, we do everything. Support us in the most tangible way - leave us a nice comment, read our books, listen to our songs. Watch movies where actual people with facial differences star, not pseudoinspirational stories about how “being disfigured is ok” where they shove an able-bodied actor into a full face prosthetic just to not have an actor with a disfigurement on set.
Include us.
As this year's Face Equality Week calls for, include us. In art, in movies, in books, in your life. Show us as positive people who are valuable, who are a part of your community - I guarantee that we are in every one that's out there. The world is hostile and unwelcoming to people with facial differences - be the change, wherever you are.
I know that it is different from the usual posts I make, but I hope it was somewhat educational. I just like to use every occasion that I can to force Face Equality into people's heads. To make this at least a bit about writing to keep the blog's theme, I will say that if you want to write about us, you need to care about us in real life as well. Otherwise, it's pointless and, as representation, genuinely worthless.
Below the readmore are some links/resources that you can click to educate yourself further. A lot of them lead to Face Equality International because they have just about everything you should know. If you want to be a better ally to people with facial differences, I heavily recommend them.
#MyFaceIsAMasterpiece
mod Sasza
https://faceequalityinternational.org/2023/04/why-i-will-not-hide/
https://www.psychologytoday.com/gb/blog/disability-is-diversity/202111/hidden-community-the-movement-face-equality
https://faceequalityinternational.org/2022/05/facial-differences-in-the-media/
https://faceequalityinternational.org/2023/04/advertising-excludes-women-with-faces-like-mine/
https://www.phoenix-society.org/resources/burn-community-bookshelf
https://faceequalityinternational.org/about-fei/international-face-equality-week/
https://faceequalityinternational.org/2023/04/hidden-from-view-women-with-facial-differences-in-the-media/
https://www.phoenix-society.org/resources/i-dont-see-your-scars
Thanks for actually clicking the readmore
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mimiamorewon · 2 months ago
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jjk men’s favorite place to have sex 
—★ mdni, reblogs appreciated 
included: gojo, geto, nanami, toji, sukuna, choso, takuma, & higuruma
content: (these are mostly jokes lol), suggestiveness, fluff, crack, explicit language
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Satoru Gojo
Favorite place: The balcony of some skyscraper because he just loves being above everyone else. both literally and figuratively.
Gojo’s would no doubt go for maximum drama. He’d make jokes like, “Don’t worry, I’ll catch you if you fall,” whole time he’s the clumsy one who might just end up tripping over his own pants.
Suguru Geto
Favorite place: A quiet hot spring or getaway in the middle of nowhere, with a no-cell-service guarantee.
Geto absolutely loves the peace and beauty of it all, but there’s definitely a part of him that enjoys “embracing his mysterious villain energy,” as stated in his own words.
He’s the type to randomly monologue about the stars or the meaning of life mid-act, leaving you wondering if you’re being seduced or lectured. +Bonus points if he can dramatically pull his hair back as steam swirls around him like he’s in a perfume commercial. “Are we even here for the sex at this point?” you’d ask him.
Kento Nanami
favorite place: A swanky, ultra-modern hotel room, preferably one with a nice view and complimentary breakfast for the morning after.
Nanami is a man of precision and schedules, so the location must be clean, practical, and include its perks.
He insists on the bed being neatly made before and after. he’s not a heathen, after all.
The whole time, he’s probably calculating how many hours of sleep he’s losing and debating if it’s worth it (It always is.)
Toji Fushiguro 
Favorite place: The backseat of a stolen car, possibly still running, most likely in a fast-food parking lot.
Toji thrives on things like chaos and bad decisions, so naturally, he’s picking somewhere dangerous and trashy.
He’s definitely cracking jokes mid-action, like, “Think the cops’ll give us five minutes if they show up?” 
If the car is manual, he’ll probably accidentally hit the clutch at some point. but it’s all part of the “fun” he says.
Ryomen Sukuna
Favorite place: On the throne of his spooky, abandoned temple, surrounded by ominous torches.
Sukuna is extra in every sense of the word. He’ll insist on a spot where he looks like a final boss in a video game. +Bonus points if there’s a sacrificial altar nearby for “the aesthetic.”
He doesn’t have an inch of subtleness within him. He’d definitely say things like, “Bow before your king” while you’re simply just trying to bust a nut.
Choso Kamo 
Favorite place: A private moonlit garden, probably near a koi pond (he read online that it’d be romantic.)
Choso is sweet but awkward, so he’s constantly trying his best to nail the mood. He’ll light a million candles and bring up random facts about flowers- “Did you know they symbolize eternal love?”
He doesn’t even care about the location, it just has to feel meaningful. 
If you reassure him he’s doing great, he might actually shed a tear mid-session.
Bonus!!!!
Takuma Ino
Favorite place: A public library after hours. (breaking small rules is as edgy as he gets).
Ino thinks he’s being super daring, but the whole time he’s whispering, “Shh, baby, don’t get too loud..” like a paranoid hall monitor.
He’s the type to accidentally knock over a stack of books mid-action and panic, saying, “Holy shit— we’re gonna get banned from libraries forever.”
Hiromi Higuruma
Favorite place: A courtroom after hours, with papers dramatically scattered everywhere.
Higuruma is a walking contradiction, so of course, he’s picking the most ironically serious place possible.
He’s 100% the type to sigh mid-moment and say something like, “This feels wrong huh? but that’s what makes it right.” 
He’d definitely joke about “objecting” if you’d try to rush things due to your fear of being caught. 
@nanaslutt for the layout inspo !╰(*´︶`*)╯♡
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moonstruckme · 3 months ago
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You asked for holiday fic ideas…
I was thinking ice skating with lanky Remus and he’s just so good at it and it’s shocking but clumsy reader keeps falling down. Just something fluffy and cute
(I know ice skating isn’t technically just for the holidays but that’s what I think of typically)
Love you darling <3
I think of ice skating that way too! Thanks for requesting <3
Remus Lupin x fem!reader ♡ 548 words
“You weren’t supposed to be so graceful, you know.” 
Remus smiles, skating alongside you while you grip the wall of the small outdoor rink for support. Sunlight refracts off the ice, making it look glittery and almost blindingly white, and at the top of the rink is stationed a plump fir tree, standing tall despite the oversized ornaments weighing it down. It had been your idea to book the two of you an hour-long slot in the rink, and you’d been even more excited about the plan when you found that Remus, like you, had never been ice skating before. Unfortunately, it seems he’s let you down by not being a complete disaster at it. 
“Would you rather I was falling all over the place?” he asks you. 
“Yes,” you answer. No hesitation, but you make it up a sheepish smile. “You have a higher center of gravity. It doesn’t seem fair that you’re naturally gifted.” 
“Right, I see. I’ll try to make more of an oaf of myself.” 
“I’d appreciate if you would.” You’re smiling. It crinkles the corners of your eyes adorably. “We were supposed to hold hands and be awkward and clumsy together. It’s not cute if it’s only me.” 
“Of course it is,” Remus says, softly enough that you look at him like you’ve not quite heard. He touches your shoulder fondly. “I’m sorry to have ruined your plan. We can still hold hands, if you like.” 
You look like you’re considering it, but you don’t take your hand more than a few inches away from the barrier before it’s flying back. “Thanks, but I think I need them both.” 
Remus can see how you would. You’d given ice skating a valiant effort, but after a series of falls he’s sure will result in a patchwork of bruises around your knees for him to kiss later, the wall has become your most treasured ally. 
“Do you want me to grab something that will help?” 
“If you mean one of those penguins the kids are using, I’m going to cut our hour short.” 
Remus chuckles. “We can go, if you want to.” Although the sun feels nice, the wind is cold. He’s willing to bet that if he pinched the tip of your nose between his fingers it’d be half frozen. 
You look over at him in surprise, then soften. “I don’t actually want to leave,” you say. “I was only joking. This is fun.” 
“Is it?” 
“I don’t know, are you having fun?” 
“I am,” Remus admits. “But I can stand on my own two legs. Are you having fun?” 
You shoot him a playful glare, but your smile undermines it. “Yeah.” You shrug, self-conscious. “I mean, I’m a bit edgy, but I’m still glad we’re here. I always have fun with you.” 
Without his permission, a coo comes from between Remus’ lips. He wraps his arm around your shoulders, careful not to put any weight on you as he kisses your head. “Oh, you’re such a melt,” he says into your hair, teasing. You laugh but don’t push him away. 
Eventually, you let him take your hands. Remus isn’t good enough to skate backwards, so you stick close to the wall, wobbly and faltering, but that’s alright. Now you’re awkward and clumsy together.
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itsgivingmami · 2 months ago
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I love your writing so much its always so engaging start to finish! If you're feeling inspired/have the time I'd love a Rhea x reader fic where they have crushes on each other as friends, but one day when they're at Rhea's home and Rhea is trying on gear options so reader to help her decide what to wear, it turns into smut!
Hey! Thanks for the request!! Hope you enjoy
What You Do To Me-Rhea Ripley
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It was one of those rare, quiet days when neither of you had any commitments. You had both found a little pocket of time to hang out, just the two of you. Rhea’s house was always comfortable, but today, there was a lightness to the air that made everything seem a little more… electric.
You had been friends for a while now—training buddies, workout partners, and more often than not, partners in crime whenever there was a wrestling show or event you both got invited to. You’d both harbored feelings for each other for months, but neither of you had ever made a move. Things between you two were already perfect. Why risk it?
At least, that’s what you told yourself.
Rhea had invited you over to help her decide on some new gear options for her upcoming match. She was picking between a few outfits and needed a second opinion. You agreed without hesitation, more than happy to spend time with her in the comfort of her own home.
You both sat in her living room, flicking through the various gear pieces she had laid out on the floor. There were a few bold options, some edgy choices, and a couple of pieces that screamed “Rhea Ripley” all over them. You were absolutely mesmerized by her casual confidence, her sharp eyes taking in every detail as she pulled the various items out of the pile.
“Okay, what do you think of this one?” Rhea asked, holding up a black and red set of gear. She stepped into the room, wearing nothing but the bottom half of the gear so far—barefoot, her toned legs and strong arms on full display.
Your breath hitched for just a second. You had to admit, the sight of her in such a powerful pose made your heart race. And even though this was nothing new—after all, you’d both seen each other in far less clothing during training—today felt different.
You swallowed thickly. “That looks… amazing on you,” you said, your voice softer than you intended.
Rhea smirked, clearly noticing the slight shift in your tone. She was trying to keep her focus on the clothes, but her eyes darted to you once more, catching the way your gaze lingered on her.
“I thought so too,” she said, voice teasing. “But is it too much? I want something that stands out, but I don’t want to go too over the top.”
You nodded, trying to compose yourself. You were supposed to be here to help not drool. The way she spoke made it clear she was playing it cool, but the subtle glint in her eyes said otherwise. It was almost as if she was testing the waters, pushing the boundaries of your friendship. And you were more than willing to dive into that uncertainty as long as you weren’t the one making the waves.
“I think it’s perfect,” you said, trying to keep your voice steady. “But let me see what else you have.”
She raised an eyebrow, clearly not buying the calm exterior you were putting on, but she went along with it. She stepped back into the room, this time changing into a different set, a deep purple outfit with metallic accents. She moved with grace, the fabric hugging her body in a way that made your heart skip a beat.
Rhea turned to face you, letting you get a good look. “And this one?”
You nodded slowly, a small smile playing at your lips. “You look incredible in anything you wear, honestly.”
Rhea’s gaze softened just slightly, though the teasing smirk never quite left her lips. “Quit being so nice mate, you’re gonna make me blush,” she teased, though there was a lightness to her words as if she barely meant it anyway.
You chuckled, your eyes flickering down to your lap to hide the flush creeping up your neck. “I mean it,” you said, voice a little more quiet now. “You always look great. But that one… it’s perfect.”
You met her gaze, the air in the room thickening just slightly. You could see the way her eyes softened as she watched you—something that had always been there, a pull between the two of you that neither of you had ever fully addressed.
“You reckon?” she asked, her voice quieter now, softer, almost vulnerable.
You felt a little bold. You stepped toward her, standing just a few feet away. “You’re stunning, Rhea. You know that, right?” you said, your voice barely above a whisper.
Rhea’s lips parted, her breath hitching just slightly. There was a long pause, and then she took a step closer, her gaze not leaving yours. She stood just inches away now, the scent of her perfume filling the air between you. “You have no idea,” she said, her voice low and intimate.
The tension between you two was palpable now. The flirtation, the crush, the shared glances over the months…all of it had built up to this moment. Neither of you could deny it anymore. The chemistry was undeniable, and you both felt it.
Rhea took another step closer, her hand reaching up to touch your cheek. “You’re the only one who gets me,” she said softly, her thumb brushing against your skin. “I’ve wanted to tell you that for so long.”
Your breath caught in your throat. “Rhea, I—”
But before you could finish your sentence, Rhea leaned in, closing the space between you two. The kiss was slow at first, tentative, as if both of you were testing the waters of a relationship that had always been there, lurking beneath the surface.
The kiss deepened, your hands moving to her waist, pulling her closer as you finally let go of all the uncertainty and just gave in to what had been building between you two for so long. Rhea held your face possessivly in her inked hand and she pulled your shorter frame up against her mouth, her other one pushing your body closer to her own against your lower back.
When you pulled away, breathless and hearts racing, Rhea rested her forehead against yours, a satisfied smile playing at her lips.
“I’ve wanted to do that for so long,” she admitted, her voice raspy and she strokes her thumb on your cheek.
“Same,” you whispered, your hands still resting on her body gripping the waist belt of her gear as a handle, not wanting to let go.
Rhea grinned, a mix of satisfaction and something deeper in her gaze. “Well, now that that’s out of the way…” she said, trailing a finger down your arm. “What do you think of the gear now?”
You laughed, completely overwhelmed by everything. “You know what? I think whatever you wear, you’ll be the most gorgeous person in the room.”
Rhea’s smirk widened as she leaned in for another kiss, this one even more passionate, filled with all the unspoken words and promises that neither of you could hold in any longer.
Rhea’s lips hovered over yours, her breath mingling with yours as she smirked. “You know,” she murmured, her voice a low rumble that sent a shiver down your spine, “you’re dangerous for my self-control.”
You swallowed hard, your heart pounding as her hands rested firmly on your hips, pulling you just a little closer. “I could say the same about you,” you whispered, your voice trembling but bold, the warmth of her skin against yours making it hard to think. Trying to take in the sensations of her body that you’d been craving and listening to her talk was starting to get harder.
Her smirk deepened, and she picked you up by the waist, effortlessly guiding you toward the couch. Your laugh escaped before you could stop it, a mix of nerves and exhilaration, but it quickly turned into a gasp when she put you down gently, staring from above you.
“You’ve been driving me bloody insane for months,” she admitted, her hands braced on either side of you
Rhea leaned down, her lips brushing against yours in a teasing whisper. “Every time you smile at me, every little laugh, every touch… you have no idea what you do to me.”
Your breath hitched as her words sank in, and you reached up, your fingers threading through her dark hair, pulling her closer. “You’re not the only one,” you murmured. “I’ve been trying so hard not to… want you as more then we’ve been,”
Her eyes darkened, a flicker of something raw and passionate flashing through them. “Why would you hold back?” she asked, her tone a mix of challenge and vulnerability.
“Because I didn’t think you felt the same,” you admitted, your cheeks heating under her intense gaze. “You’re a super star wrestling champion and I’m,” you gestured at yourself
Rhea let out a low growl, the sound vibrating through her chest as she leaned down, her lips brushing your ear. “You’ve got no idea how wrong you were,” she whispered before gently nibbling your earlobe, “and are,”
Before you could respond, her lips finally captured yours in a searing kiss that left you breathless. Her hands slid down your sides, her touch firm yet gentle, as if she was savoring the moment. You melted into her, your body instinctively arching to meet hers. Months of fighting your natural instinct to lean into her every chance you got had melted away immediately.
The kiss deepened, her tongue ring brushing against your lips, seeking permission that you eagerly granted. Your hands roamed over her shoulders and down her back, marveling at the strength beneath your fingertips. She groaned softly into the kiss, her body pressing more firmly against yours, the weight of her sending a thrilling jolt through you as your reminded how quickly she physically dominate your body.
When she finally pulled back, both of you were panting, your foreheads resting together as you tried to catch your breath. “You’re even more beautiful like this, panting and flushed,” she said, her voice husky and full of admiration. “It’s been a bitch at the gym,”
You smiled, your hands resting on her waist. “You’re not so bad yourself, Ripley.”
She chuckled, leaning down to press a soft kiss to the corner of your mouth. “You’re intolerable, you know that?”
“And you love it,” you teased, feeling more confident now that her feelings were out in the open.
Her smirk returned as she traced a finger down your cheek. “You’re right. I do.”
Rhea leaned in again, her kiss even more passionate than before, as if sealing the promise of what was to come. The heat between you was undeniable, and the rest of the world faded away, leaving only the two of you in each other’s arms.
Is it smut? No. Is it close? Also no. Forgive me🙏🏻 part 2🤔
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celestie0 · 1 year ago
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gojo satoru x reader | college au [18+]
kickoff ch.5 these feelings are hard to find
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ᰔ pairing. college au - soccer player! gojo x film major! reader
ᰔ summary. gojo satoru is the most popular guy on your college campus. he's tall, funny, hot, not to mention he's the most talented soccer forward the school has seen in years. but he's also a frat dude, which puts him in a world very different from your own, as he spends most of his nights partying & drinking while you spend most of yours working on your annoying film major assignments. but when he reaches out to you for a favor, you realize that helping him out might have something in it for you too.
ᰔ warnings/tags. 18+, fem reader, fluff, angst, smut, college au, fraternities, sororities, partying, drinking/alcohol, mentions of weed, romance, jealousy, pining, slow burn, opposites to lovers, friends to lovers, she falls first he falls harder, gojo being an idiot
ᰔ chapter. 5/x (probably 12)
ᰔ words. 10.4k
a/n. aaaa this chapter took me a while because i was having some pretty bad writer's block. i seriously can't believe it crossed over 10k words, i very poorly planned how much i wanted to get done by this chapter, but i didn't feel like splitting it into two so oh wellll. hope you enjoy! pls excuse any typos we all live on a floating rock.
nav. masterlist
☾·̩͙꙳ moodboard no.1
♬.*゚playlist
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“I really don’t understand why I’m here…” you’re grumbling as you, Mina and Todo make your way up the pavement of the driveway leading to the house party. You glance to your right where Mina and Todo are holding hands, arms swinging as they keep pace together. 
It was finally Friday after a particularly long and stressful week, so you were extremely excited to just spend the rest of the night relaxing at home. You had already poured yourself a glass of wine when you returned from your evening class and were sitting on the couch with a blanket on, scrolling through Netflix, when Mina approached you while she was talking to Todo on the phone. She mentioned something about an SAE party tonight that she wanted you to come along for and Todo said he’d extend his other invite to you. When you politely declined, Mina slumped down on the couch and told Todo she had no interest in going unless you also came. And then Todo was bribing you with a hundred bucks. Easiest hundred bucks you’ve ever made. 
“Don’t be a downer. You’re here because I think you’ve been working hard and you need to relax a bit,” Mina chirps, now clinging onto Todo’s arm, “and there’s no better way to relax than getting drunk.”
“I could be getting drunk at home,” you mumble to yourself, the night you were imagining for yourself all day being very different from where you find yourself now. 
The guy that was bouncing for tonight’s party was scanning people’s phones and engaging in some small talk before allowing people inside. He was pretty handsome and you wondered if there was some sort of requirement written in the rules to the SAE fraternity that they must be good-looking to join.
“Hello, my brother,” Todo says as he approaches, smacking him so hard on the back in greeting that the man stumbles over slightly and sends an irritated glare Todo’s way before he regains his balance.
“Hey, big guy, are these your invites?” He gestures towards you and Mina, his eyes landing on yours and lingering for a moment. You blink at him. 
“Yes, this here’s my lovely lady, and this here’s my lovely lady’s friend,” Todo says with a faux suave that only makes you narrow your eyes at him. The man at the entrance sighs and nods before stepping out of the way and motioning the three of you towards the entrance. 
The minute you enter, you immediately realize that this party felt very different from the one you were at last week. It was slightly less crowded, but there were still plenty of people bustling around the large expanse of the ground floor with loud rap music that practically shook the walls. It was dark, much more edgy, with the only source of light being the sporadic flashing of lights over by the DJ’s booth. You felt disoriented from the atmosphere, and the smell of weed and alcohol only further dazed you. 
“This is insane,” you barely hear Mina say beside you over the music as she looks around the expansive interior of the house. In between the brief flickering lights that lit up people’s faces, you register that Todo is grinning at her as though he was entirely satisfied by her reaction. 
You only make it a few steps inside, trailing behind Mina and Todo, before feeling the need to excuse yourself to get away from the intense environment for a second. “Hey, I think I’m going to use the restroom real quick. Todo, do you have any idea where it is?” You feel like you’re shouting just to be heard. 
He looks over his shoulder at you. “There are some downstairs but they probably have lines. You could try upstairs.” 
You give him an appreciative nod and head over to the base of the staircase at the right, glancing up before making your ascent. There didn’t seem to be anyone else upstairs, which surprised you, but you figured you were just in luck and began to walk up step by step until reaching the top. The music downstairs begins to sound muffled as you turn around the railing post and make your way to the left into the narrow hallway likely leading towards the bedrooms. There's a white door somewhere in the middle of the hallway that could only be either a closet or a bathroom. You wrap your hand around the cold metal door handle and twist, satisfied that it wasn’t locked.
The mumbling noises of people inside doesn’t register in your mind until you’ve already cracked the door open half-way, and your entire body recoils in the immediate rush of embarrassment washing over you as you take in the sight of two people, a man and a woman, getting handsy with one another in the bathroom. 
“Oh god, I’m so sorry,” is all you manage to squeak out, blinking dumbly at the scene. 
You’re quick to avert your gaze and about to close the door, incredibly mortified by what’s just happened, when the familiar silhouette in front of you causes you to freeze. You slowly lift your line of sight from the bathroom floor until Gojo Satoru is looking you straight in the eye from where he has a girl on the bathroom counter clinging to his shirt. 
“I…” you stutter, face feeling immediately hot as you let go of the door handle and look away from his shocked face. “Sorry,” you say again, this time barely above a whisper, before turning on your heel and making your way down the hallway in such a hurry that you don’t even realize you’re going the wrong way. You hear a feminine voice echo something in the bathroom like what the fuck are you doing?, and then there’s footsteps following after you that sound faster than your own. Ignoring the call of your name, you practically storm into one of the bedrooms, entirely relieved that it was empty, and can only take a couple of steps inside before a hand grabs at your wrist. A chill runs down your spine from the contact.
“Wait, y/n,” Gojo says behind you from where he’s followed you inside, sounding like he’s out of breath. His hand is still holding onto you, keeping you still and you can feel the roughness of his calluses against your skin. When you turn around to face him, he’s close to you and you see his chest is heaving, his hair is disheveled, his shirt is wrinkled at the front and there’s a crease in his brow. 
Your eyes don’t stay on his for long before you’re looking away from him again. “I’m…I’m really sorry, that was really awkward,” you say with a forced laugh and an attempt to wiggle yourself free of his grip but he’s unrelenting. The image of his fingers sliding up that girl’s top was still burned in your vision and no amount of excessive blinking at the carpet beneath your feet seemed to make it disappear. 
“No, I’m sorry, I was supposed to lock…” his trails off and you notice there’s a rough quality to his voice, “that was just-, we were just-”
You finally brave yourself to look up at him and he somehow seems closer than before, his face just inches away from yours and his eyes briefly flickering to your lips before he meets your gaze with a tense expression on his face. You haven’t seen him look so flustered before, and you’ve certainly never heard him struggle this much to find his words either. 
His other hand rubs the back of his neck as he closes his eyes in what looks like frustration, then takes a deep breath to seemingly calm himself down before speaking again. “She’s…We’re just friends,” is all he manages to say. 
There’s a silence between the two of you as you blink at him and he stares at you, his thumb pressing into the skin of where his hand was still wrapped around your wrist. You try really hard to bite back the words you’re about to say, but no amount of willpower could’ve helped you. Your chin tips up, looking at him more decisively, and his gaze is flickering to your mouth again. “Just friends…can’t say I’ve ever tried to get my friends naked in the bathroom at a party before.” You didn’t understand why your tone came off so hostile, but it felt good to criticize his choice of words for some reason.
His lips press together, gaze narrowing slightly and eyebrows furrowing further at your words. He leans in closer to the point where your senses were entirely occupied by him and it was impossible to think of anything else. “Well, you weren’t supposed to see that.” His eyes are contrite but his tone is vexed. 
You relax your body language and use your other hand to forcefully slide his hand off of your wrist, encountering some resistance from him before he acquiesces. Your skin tingles from the absence of his touch and you take a step backwards away from him. His posture straightens slightly, eyes continuing to dart across the features of your face and wide in anticipation as though he was patiently waiting for you to say something that would put him at ease. 
“It’s fine,” you say, trying your best to keep your voice as level as possible, “I accidentally walked in on something I shouldn’t have. You don’t owe me any sort of explanation for it.” Gojo seems to tense up even further at your words, his expression briefly contorting into one of confusion before it reverts to concern again. 
You walk around him towards the bedroom door and see him in your periphery watching every step you take until you eventually exit the room. This time, you don’t hear his footsteps pursuing you from behind. It’s only when you make it past the bathroom, not even daring to take a look inside of it, and about halfway down the hallway that you unsteadily let out the breath you were holding in. Your hand takes its place over your chest in a flimsy attempt to calm your heart down as you quickly make your way down the stairs. There was a sinking feeling in your stomach and you knew you just had to get as far away from here as possible. 
You’re barely able to spot Mina from where she stood with Todo in a corner near the backyard screen door, and briefly notice that Nanami, Geto, as well as a few of their other teammates were clustered there too. You politely acknowledge their pleasant greetings to you as you approach Mina, pulling her to the side.
“Woah, hey, what’s going on?” She asks, stumbling a little bit and you let go of her sleeve. 
“I’m going to go home, not feeling well, I think I just got my period,” you easily come up with a lie, “Nobara says she’ll pick me up.” In truth, you were planning on just calling an Uber for home, but you knew that Mina wouldn’t let you go home by yourself. You didn’t want your confusing and heightened emotions ruining her night.
“Wait, are you sure? I’ll come with you,” she’s quick to say, taking a step towards you but you shake your head.
“No, it’s fine, stay here with Todo,” you demand, “and call me if you need me to pick you up. I’ll let you know when I’m home.” You give her a little hug and she’s standing there confused before hesitantly nodding, and then you make your way to the door. The loud music, flashing lights, and blurred faces around you were so intensely stimulating that when the cold air from outside finally hit your skin, you felt like you were human again. 
The Uber comes by in less than ten minutes as you wait for it on the sidewalk. The driver drops you off at the entrance of your apartment complex and the biting chill of the air has you wrapping your arms around yourself as you wait for the elevator to take you upstairs. Glancing down at your phone to check the time, you see a message from Mina asking if you were home yet. You also see that it’s nearly one in the morning.
Finally making your way inside your apartment, you lock the door behind you and text Mina that you’re home, then slide down with your back against the front door until you’re sitting on the floor. The heat inside was so comforting that you just spent a moment to warm yourself up and just breathe. 
Memories of your conversation with Gojo from just half an hour ago instantly come to the forefront of your mind and you’re shutting your eyes to try and repel the thoughts away. Still so embarrassed that you walked in on him making out with someone, your brain decides to mortify you even further by asking what if you had walked in a few moments later instead? What would you have seen then? 
You squish your cheeks between your hands defeatedly before letting out a sigh and drawing your legs in towards you, hugging your knees to your chest. You didn’t understand why you were so affected by what you saw. You’ve only met Gojo twice, and you knew even before you met him that he was that kind of person. He had a reputation of being involved with a lot of women, so his rather eager desire to explain himself to you just puzzled you even further. 
Standing up, you head over to your bed and flop down on it. Your wrist still burns with the memory of the heat of his hand, and all you can see behind the lids of your eyes when you close them is the sight of him so close to you, stealing glances at your lips. 
Somewhere along the night as you drifted in and out of sleep, Mina called to let you know that she was on her way home. When you hear her open the bedroom door and set her purse down on the nightstand near her bed, your body finally convinces you that it’s okay to rest, and that’s exactly what you do.
---
The weekend is over in the blink of an eye, simply not enough time to mope around in bed, and you’re walking out of your last class of the day on Monday. You check your phone pretty much every other minute to see if Gojo has sent you any messages regarding their new practice schedule for the week, which you’re sure he’s received by now, but there’s nothing. The last messages sent between the two of you were before the party on Friday, and an uneasy feeling has been settling in. You spent most of last week appreciating how helpful he was being so far, but you didn’t even consider the possibility that he could rescind his help at any time too.
You head over to the Department of Communication & Journalism building, making your way up the stairs until you reach the graduate division floor and walk down the hallway to Room 212. As you make your entry, a toasty and rich scent overtakes your senses. 
“Ah, y/n, hello! So good to see you, thanks for coming by. I missed seeing you last week,” you hear Utahime say as she sets down a cup of coffee for you on the conference table in the middle of the room.
“Sorry, I was just…very mentally occupied last week,”  you admit to her, setting your tote bag down on one of the chairs before taking the seat where the cup of coffee was placed, the fragrance instantly waking you up as you take a sip. “Thank you. How have you been?”
“I’ve been well, thank you, just working through my thesis,” she says with a sigh and takes the seat next to you. “Just a few more months…just a few more months, and I’m free!”
You smile at her and watch as she pulls out her laptop, the start-up noise chiming before she starts clicking away at the million tabs that were open. “Did you receive the email I sent you for the newsletter shots?” You ask.
Utahime was a 4th-year graduate student in journalism and was also the head of the school’s newsletter. She has so graciously allowed for Film Club photography shout-outs in every monthly issue for the past couple of years.
She nods. “I did,” she says, resting her elbow on the table and tapping her index finger to her chin, “how come I didn’t see any of your photos in there, though?”
You sigh, sulking your shoulders slightly as you peer down into the brown liquid of your cup and watch the steam evaporate. “I didn’t really take great pictures this month.”
“Aw, well are you working on anything right now?” She returns to clicking away at tabs.
“Yeah, I’ll be taking film photos out on the field of the soccer team’s game against Osaka Uni next week. It’s for an assignment,” you tell her and watch as her face lights up.
“That’s wonderful! That’s a pretty big gig, they usually only let professionals out on the field. How were you able to secure that?” Utahime asks you as she tips her head to the side.
“Ah…let’s just say I have some sort of deal with one of their players?” You say. Your heart drops a little when you remember the lack of communication from Gojo as of recently, wondering if he was able to get that referee permission for you.
“Which one?” Utahime asks with a teasing smile, leaning over to nudge you with her elbow.
“Gojo Satoru,” you say and then she’s pulling away from you and rolling her eyes, an annoyed look making its way onto her face. You let out a small laugh at her behavior. “Okay, well now I’m curious.”
She lets out an exasperated sigh as she peers beyond the window of the room. “I was his TA when he was just a wee-little freshman. He was always showing up late to class and trying to flirt his way out of completing assignments,” she grumbles, “is he still a little brat?”
You worry your bottom lip between your teeth, thinking way harder about her question than she had probably intended. “I don’t know…I don’t really know him all that well.” You look down at your hands. Despite the fact that you’ve only known Gojo for a short while, for some reason you felt like you did know him well. You knew the kinds of things that made him smile, you knew the look in his eyes when he was deep in thought about something. You knew what the heat from his body felt like, what the fragrance of his clothes smelled like. 
Utahime is silent for a moment as she studies you. “Hmm,” she’s humming next to you, “well, tell you what, send me your photos when you’re done with them. If they’re good, I’ll use your photos for the sports recap in the newsletter instead of the professional ones we get sent from the school. I can compensate you for them as well.”
Your eyes widen as you look at her, jaw dropping a bit as you blink in disbelief. “Utahime…you would do that for me?”
She gives you a smile and a wink. “Of course, talent helps talent. And it’s my newsletter, I can do whatever I want with it. Besides, you want to get into the school’s film graduate program, right? I’m sure it would look great on your application that you’ve had some of your portfolio published to the school’s official reports. The photos have to be good, though.” She points a finger at you and gives you a strict look.
You feel tears prickle in your eyes from her words, so overwhelmingly grateful for her support, and can barely whisper out a thank you before she’s rushing over to the other table to grab a tissue box and set it in front of you.
“Gosh, why do all my undergrads cry in my presence?” she complains as she pulls out a tissue and hands it to you.
You dab it to your eye. “Because you have such wholesome mom energy.” 
You say goodbye to Utahime after discussing a few more things and then leave the room. You check your phone and your heart skips a beat when you see Gojo’s name in your notifications.
|| 1:43PM Gojo Satoru: Hey, just wanted to let you know I was able to get that referee permission for you for next week
You let out a tiny gasp when you read his words then clutch your phone to your chest in relief. Utahime’s offer of the prospect of getting published in the school’s newsletter gave you a large sense of purpose, and you felt like it was time to take this assignment of yours extremely seriously to secure the opportunity. And Gojo was the one with the power to help you do that.
|| 1:52PM You: thank you so much, i really don’t know how to repay you
You sigh as you make your way to the stairs, grateful that you were getting some communication from him. The big game on the 28th was next Thursday, and you really needed to practice taking photos with your film camera. You open Instagram again to ask him for his practice schedule, but you see that he had sent you another message.
|| 1:54PM Gojo Satoru: No need to repay me, consider us even. Also sorry for the late notice, but we’re having a formal practice match in about an hour with one of the teams we played against earlier in the season. Do you want to come by?
After reading his message, you quickly shuffle your tote bag open and peer inside to see that you did indeed bring your film camera with you to campus today. Excited, you type out a response.
|| 1:55PM You: yes! i’ll hesd over right now
|| 1:55PM You: *head over
|| 1:55PM You: lol
You see little bubbles indicating typing in the left side corner.
|| 1:55PM Gojo Satoru: Meet me by the art sculpture, I’ll walk you over
You blink at the message for a few seconds, starting to type out a message before deleting it, and doing that a couple more times over. When someone tries to shuffle around you from behind, you notice you were standing awkwardly at the top of the stairs so you step away and lean against the wall. You press your lips together in consideration as you realize that today would be the first time you’re going to see Gojo again after that awkward interaction that you had with him at the party last Friday, and you were really not sure how you were going to feel having to be alone with him again.
|| 1:57PM You: that’s okay, i don’t want to trouble you
His response is instant.
|| 1:57PM Gojo Satoru: Just meet me there
Once you’ve made your way across campus, you spot Gojo sitting on the concrete barrier surrounding the art sculpture by the fields practically right in front of the please do not sit on the concrete barrier sign. His head is turned away from the direction you were approaching from, arms crossed at his chest and one of his legs impatiently bouncing up and down. You notice he’s wearing the school’s colors, a teal blue shirt and gray shorts that had some highlights of a sunset yellow, as well as gray athletic soccer shin socks and cleats. He looks so ridiculously sports boyfriend that you have to shake your head to try and physically fight the effect of how attracted you were to him.
He must’ve heard you approaching as you crossed the street towards him since he turned his head in your direction. He’s wearing a black sports headband across his forehead that’s pushing the hair up out of his face and you’re startled by the intensity of his blue eyes on you. When he stands up, his arms fall to his side, making you sad that you could no longer shamelessly stare at the way his biceps flexed when he had his arms crossed.
“Hey,” he says simply, staying perfectly still where he stood. 
There was only one way to dissolve an awkward situation, and that was to pretend like it never happened in the first place. You tip your head to the side, giving him a curious look before skipping right on up to him. “Hello, there,” you cheerfully say. He looks at you with a borderline annoyed expression.
“You’re in a good mood today,” he comments, his voice sounding deeper than usual. Almost tired. 
“Yes, very good mood,” you chirp as you walk past him, “I just got a very good offer.”
The sound of the bottom of his cleats on the sidewalk follow after you as you head in the direction of the softball batting cages. It's not long before he emerges at your side in your periphery. “What kind of offer?” You can tell from his tone that he was trying to restrain his curiosity. 
“Oh, you’ll see,” you say as you look up at him and smile. He gives you an irritated expression due to your lack of transparency but you continue to skip forward until you’ve made it to stairs that lead up to the grassy hills. 
Gojo’s about a step’s distance behind you as you lightly frolic across the land, your heavy tote bag bumping against your hip with every jump. You feel something fly out of it which halts you in your gleeful stride and look behind to where your bluetooth laptop mouse has fallen onto the grass right in front of Gojo. He’s sighing before crouching down to pick it up, then takes a step towards you and extends it out to you. When you glance up at him, he’s not looking at you and his face is hard to read. 
You grab the mouse from him, fingertips brushing against the skin of his palm, and he ever-so-slightly shivers at the touch. His gaze finally meets yours.
With a sigh, you toss your computer mouse back into your bag. “I’m trying really hard to not feel awkward around you right now, but you’re making it pretty difficult.” You were so used to feeling like he has the upper edge of conversation when you’re with him, but now you felt like you were the one with the power.
He raises an eyebrow at you and when you look at his hands, you notice he was apprehensively cracking his knuckles with his thumbs. “Maybe you wouldn’t feel awkward if you actually stayed to talk last Friday.”
You cross your arms across your chest, disliking his tone. “Stayed to talk? About what? How not close you are with your ‘friends’?” 
He tips his head up to the sky and closes his eyes, his brow furrowing like he was entirely frustrated by you, before he looks back down at you again. “If you don’t want to believe me, that’s fine, but what’s with you always running away whenever I try to talk to you?”
“I wasn’t feeling well that night,” you mumble to him as you turn away and continue to walk towards the practice field. It was the truth, you weren’t feeling well that night, and it was because seeing him kissing another girl made your stomach drop to the core of the Earth. But that wasn’t something you were going to admit to him. It wasn’t even something you were ready to admit to yourself. “Also, it’s not that I don’t believe you, it’s that I don’t care to believe you.”
“But why don’t you care?” he’s asking you, his voice sounding desperate now as he makes his way to your side again. He’s looking at you but you’re looking straight ahead.
You roll your eyes, continuing to march forwards. “Not everyone cares about your love life, Satoru. Contrary to what you might think.”
He jogs ahead a few steps, now walking backwards in front of you and you narrow your eyes at him. His tongue is poking at the inside of his cheek and then there’s a boyish grin on his face. “Say that again.”
“Say what again?” you ask.
“My name,” he says. 
You almost roll your eyes out of your head when you see his amused expression. “I seriously can’t believe this right now,” you’re muttering under your breath and walk past him down the large hill leading to the practice field, his gaze on you burning through your skin until you’re rubbing at your cheek with the back of your hand in a feeble attempt to physically wipe the blush away.
The practice field was much more crowded and busy than it was during the first practice you went to last week. Looking across to the other side, you see a group of men huddled near one of the benches, all of them wearing maroon-colored shirts with black shorts that have gold stripes running down the side of them. None of them were wearing jerseys, but you assumed they were wearing their school colors as some sort of distinguishing clothing that would help them during the practice match. 
“Satoru! Where the hell have you been?” You flinch upon hearing Coach Yaga’s stern voice nearby and you look over to where he had his arms crossed and glaring at Gojo through his thick sunglasses.
Gojo walks past you towards the benches and gives Coach Yaga a salute. “Sorry, sir, personal business.” He then makes his way over to the rest of his teammates that were huddled on this side of the field. There were a few tables located on the sidelines that had refillable water stations, bottles of Gatorade, towels and all sorts of other athletic gear. You walk up to one of the tables and fix the settings on your film camera before taking a snapshot of the items laid out on it. 
The atmosphere is light since this wasn’t an official match and so you spend some time fidgeting with your camera before they get started. You can only imagine how tense it must be during a proper tournament game at the actual stadium off-campus, the thought of thousands of people spectating from stands sending a shiver down your spine. Athletes were of a whole different breed, despite how wholesome and down-to-earth most of the UTokyo soccer players you’ve met so far were.
Eventually, Coach Yaga and the other coach from the opposing school blow their whistles, both acting as referees for the match, and the players scatter themselves across the field. You notice Gojo is at the center of the circle in the middle, his foot on top of the ball as he scans his eyes across the field to each of the players with a focused look in his eyes. He draws his foot back, and just when you think he’s about to kick it forwards to where he was looking, the back of his heel makes contact with the ball instead and it’s sent swiftly behind him towards Geto. Instantly, all the players begin to move across the field, some of the offensive opposing side charging towards Geto as he shuffles the ball between his feet before kicking it way ahead of him to another one of their teammates. You bring your camera up to your face and take a snapshot when one of the opposing team’s defenders makes an attempt to steal the ball. 
The play continues further, both teams playing a push-and-pull with the ball. Gojo makes an attempt at a goal before the opposing team’s goalie lunges for the ball that was flying in the air straight towards the net, catching it in his arms and then crashing down onto the ground. Somewhere along the intense match, the coaches call half-time and you’re shocked by how fast the first half went by. 
Some of the players retreat to the benches to quench their thirst and wipe the perspiration off their faces with their towels, while others remain on the green expanse to pace around while catching their breath. Your attention is drawn to Gojo who stood at the center with his hands on his hips and breathing visibly heavily. He leisurely shuffles the ball between his feet with an innate rhythm before passing it off towards Geto who stood a few feet away from him. Gojo pulled his headband off of his face, his hair falling over his forehead onto the sheen layer of sweat above his eyes. With each breath, his chest rises and falls, lips parted in a display of exertion, and then he grabs at the hem of his shirt to lift it to his face, exposing his toned torso, as he wipes away the sweat at his temples. Your eyes widen at the sight, almost entranced as a wave of arousal suddenly consumes you, before he releases his grip on the fabric and it falls back down. He pushes his hair back up out of his face with one of his hands, the other securing the headband back onto his forehead with a snap, and the muscles of his arms tense fluidly with every motion. 
You quickly look away from him, afraid he'll catch you staring, and blink at the grass as you notice the fast beating of your heart. Coach Yaga's whistle blows, causing you to look back up again. Players were making their way back onto the field and Gojo found his position at the center again. His eyes darted across the field, making their way onto the faces of each player, and then they eventually landed on you. There’s a glimmer in his eyes, the corner of his mouth twitching upwards slightly into a small smile before he's looking back down at the ball by his feet. And then they start the kickoff.
UTokyo ends up winning 3-1, and by the end of the match the sun is starting to set, painting the sky beautiful hues of purple and orange. You lean over to pick your things up off the grass as the players make their final retreat to the benches, and you gently place your film camera back into its case when Gojo’s voice next to you makes you jump.
“Hey. Please don’t run off,” he says. When you turned to look at him, he was still breathing a bit fast and he had a flushed, almost serene, look across his face. “Give me your phone.” He extends his open palm out to you. 
“My phone?” You ask him, reaching for where it was located in your back pocket and pulling it out. He nods without any further explanation. You place it in his palm and he’s tapping away at it before handing it back to you. When you look down, you notice he gave a random number a call.
“That’s my number. Save it,” he says. You blink at him. His expression is soft for a moment and then he’s turning around and away from you, heading over to where his teammates were crowded around one of the tables and giving each other pats on the back.
You tip your head to the side to watch him as a couple of his teammates sling their arm around his neck and smack his chest, masculine laughter and jokes filling the air. You can’t help but smile before you pick up your things and start making your way up the hill away from the field, back towards the heart of campus. 
---
The following days of the week where you don’t see Gojo play soccer seems like a waste, because why weren’t you spending every single day of your life watching him play soccer? You sigh to yourself at the question as you use clothing pins to hang up the film photos you took up onto a wall in your school’s photo lab. You finished developing the photos from Monday’s practice match, only to realize that you accidentally took them on one of your black-and-white rolls instead of full-color. You step back to take a look at all the images you had clipped onto the string pinned to the walls, snapping a shot of the collage with your phone, before pulling them all back down and stuffing them into a Manila folder. 
The only time the photo lab wasn’t bustling with other film & photography majors was usually after sunset, but by the time you finished having dinner with one of your friends on campus, you had made it there around 7PM. By the time you leave and make it to your parked car, it’s pitch black outside. As you step inside your car and turn the key to ignite the engine, the windshield wipers automatically swiping as the control lights inside come to life, the clock on your dashboard reads 10:37PM. 
The GPS for some reason prompts you to take an alternative route back to your apartment that avoids the freeway in an attempt to save you from twenty minutes of traffic, and you consider what to do for a moment before the exhaustion in your bones convinces you to take the allegedly faster way home.
As you begin to head in the unfamiliar direction, the excitement you had to make it home as soon as possible slowly starts to dwindle more and more as the streets morph from well-lit and bustling with people to dark and surrounded by trees instead. What used to be a three-lane street turned into one, and you count the seconds between every passing car you see coming by in the opposite direction. You’re worried when your counting makes it past sixty seconds. 
You turn your music up in your car to distract yourself from the fear of driving down the secluded and dark road. There was a slight fog settling up ahead in front of you to where you could only see clearly about thirty feet ahead. You spot something on the road, blinking rapidly to focus your vision, and then your eyes widen when you realize what it was. Rocks.
You’re instantly swerving your car to the side, attempting to deftly avoid the scattered rocks but unfortunately you drive over a few of them, causing your tire to pop and you let out a scream when you lose handle on your car. One of the rocks flies up and hits your windshield, cracking the glass, and suddenly you’re driving up over the curb to the right before you finally regain control of your car and swerve back onto the road, slamming on the brakes.
Your heart is beating fast in your chest, adrenaline rushing through your body, and you grip onto the steering wheel while you try to regain your breath. Your windshield had a large crack in it, large enough to where the cold air from outside was whistling its way inside your car, and you were slanted in your seat due to the punctured tire at the front. As you took deep breaths, you noticed how alone you were on a dimly lit street where you hadn’t seen a single car in more than five minutes, fear and anxiety surging through your body. Your hands reach for your phone, shakily turning it on and exhaling in relief when you see that you have reception, then call the emergency telephone line.
“Hello, how can we help you?” a feminine voice on the other end of the line says.
“Hi, um,” you say, voice sounding shaky, “I just got a flat tire on Musashi road, about five miles from the Main Street intersection. I don’t have a spare on me, and my windshield is cracked too…could you send roadside assistance?”
“Yes, absolutely,” the woman says kindly and begins to take down some information from you. “Thank you, ma’am. Unfortunately, there has been a big accident on the freeway, so many of the tow-trucks and officers have been dispatched to that area. It may take about an hour for help to arrive. Are you able to call someone to come stay with you as you wait?”
“Oh…” You press your lips together in thought. “Yes, I should be able to.” After working out a bit more logistics with the woman on the other line, you hang up and then you’re scrolling through your contacts. You first call Mina’s line, which goes straight to voicemail, and then you remember that she was out of town for tonight and half of tomorrow visiting her family. You call Nobara, who also doesn’t pick up, and then a couple of your other friends who go straight to voicemail as well. You start to panic slightly before calling your friend Maki who lives two hours away.
“Hello?” You hear her voice say when she picks up.
“Maki! Oh my gosh, thank you for picking up,” you say to her through the phone, your hand on your chest as you sigh. You explain your situation to her and she’s instantly providing you with soothing words. 
“Is there no one that can come stay with you? I feel awful that I’m so far away,” she says.
“It’s okay, they said that help will be here in maybe fifty minutes now…I just really wanted to talk to someone,” you say, peering out into the darkness of the night. You’re still shocked you haven’t seen a single car drive by in the past ten minutes. You pull your phone from your face to check the time and see a notification on your phone that says 5% battery remaining. “Oh, shit.”
“What?” Maki asks worriedly.
“My phone is running out of battery…” you say with a defeated tone. Your anxiety starts to rise in your chest again. “I don’t know if I can stay on the line.” You scroll through your contacts again, finger halting the screen when your eyes land on another name. “I…I think I have someone else I can try calling.”
“Good, try that. I don’t want you to be stuck out there with a dead phone and a flat tire. Let me know if this person doesn’t pick up, okay?” She’s saying to you and you send her your location before hanging up.
You’re breathing heavily from fear when a particularly harsh gust of wind pushes more cold air through the crack of your windshield. Pulling your phone from your face, you click on the name in your contacts and bring your phone to your ear. It rings once, twice, almost a third time before you hear a click and then a voice.
“Y/n?” Gojo’s voice calls out, sounding surprised. 
Hearing his voice immediately causes a wave of relief to wash over you and you lay back in your seat, having to muffle the abrupt sob that threatens to erupt from the tightness in your throat. “Hi,” you whisper.
“Hey, is everything okay?” he asks. 
“Mm…no,” you admit to him, sniffling slightly and swiping at the stray tear that rolls down your cheek with the sleeve of your shirt. “I’m just a bit scared right now.” Your voice cracks towards the end of your sentence and you silently berate yourself for not mustering enough emotional strength at the moment. 
“Tell me what’s wrong,” he says, his voice starting to sound uneasy. 
“I was driving down this road, it was dark, I couldn’t really see much…but I ended up driving over these rocks and my tire punctured. I called for roadside assistance and they said it would take about an hour for help to arrive,” you ramble, “I tried calling Mina, and some of my other friends to come and wait with me, but-” You run out of breath to finish your sentence and you’re sniffling again. 
“Send me your location, I’m heading over right now,” he says and you hear what sounds like keys jingling in the background along with some other shuffling noises, “can you stay on the line?”
You pull your phone from your ear and see that you’re at 3% now before sending him your location. “No…my phone is running out of battery.” 
He’s silent for a second on the other end. “It says I’ll be there in twelve minutes. Just…hang tight, okay? Make sure your doors are locked.” 
You nod before remembering that he can’t see you, so you say I will. He’s hesitant to hang up on you but when your phone flashes from 3% to 2%, you tell him you don’t have much of a choice and then he’s giving you another word of caution before reluctantly hanging up. You’re all alone to your thoughts in your car again, shaking from the anxiety and blinking tears away. 
The twelve-minute wait felt so long, and eventually Gojo texts you that he’s one minute away when your phone is at 1% battery. You see headlights approaching behind your car in your rearview mirror, the first sight of another human being you’ve seen in probably the past thirty minutes stepping out of the driver’s seat and you immediately recognize his silhouette. He walks up to the passenger side door and tips his head down so he’s visible through the window. At the sight of him, you finally release the breath you were holding in before opening your car door and stepping outside. You both look at each other across the top of your car and you notice him letting out a deep breath of his own as his shoulders relax at the sight of you. 
He makes his way wordlessly around the front of your car to you and he’s studying your face intently. You look away from him when you realize he could probably tell that your eyes were puffy and that you had been crying. From your periphery, you see the back of his hand reach out when he’s right in front of you, hesitating slightly before it briefly brushes against your cheek, dabbing at a tear that you must’ve missed. His hand is warm against your skin and the sudden desire to hug him consumes every single fiber of your being, but when you look up at him, the soft expression on his face renders you still. 
“Thank you for coming,” you’re whispering to him.
He lets out a short comical exhale through his nose. “I wasn’t going to not come. What kind of person do you think I am?”
You shiver as another gust of wind passes through, crossing your arms across yourself. Gojo slips the jacket he was wearing off, revealing a beige sweater underneath, and then he’s circling around you to place it over your back. It’s cozy and it smells like him.
You’re about to voice your concern for him but his voice behind you cuts you off. “I run warm, don’t worry.” 
He walks around to the front of your car, bending over to the side to assess the flat tire at the front, his hands shoved into his pockets. You pull his jacket around you tighter. “Damn, the tread on your tires is horrendous. No wonder. You should really check on them more often.” He straightens himself up and peers at the crack across your windshield. “And that’s definitely not gonna be cheap to fix.”
You sigh in annoyance, his casual tone causing your eye to twitch slightly, but when you noticed your heart was calm and your breathing was normal again, you looked at him with the realization that him just being here managed to soothe you. 
He looks back over at you with a considerate expression. “Do you want to sit in my car? It’s chilly out here.”
You press your lips together before shaking your head. “I feel like I need the fresh air.”
Gojo’s walking over to the patch of grass on the pavement at the side of the road and sits down on the curb. He pats the spot next to him with an awaiting look on his face and you make your way to him, sitting to his left. He looks down at the distance you’ve put between the two of you, almost three feet, and he’s sighing before scootching closer to you. “Don’t be greedy with your body heat. I said I run warm, not that I’m a furnace.”
His shoulder brushes against yours and his knee bumps against your thigh as he gets comfortable. You bring your legs closer to you and wrap your arms around them, resting your chin on top of your knee. Gojo was leaning back onto his outstretched arms behind him, legs extended in front as he tipped his head back up to look at the sky. You look over at him. His gaze slowly shifts from one point in the sky to the other, and you wonder what he’s mapping with his eyes. 
“Thank you for getting the referee permission for me,” you say, realizing you never thanked him in person. “I’m excited to take photos out on the field next week.”
“Sure thing, my freaky little photographer. I’m sure you are,” he chimes. 
You stick your bottom lip out in an annoyed pout. “So, we’re even now.”
He looks over at you and smiles. His blue eyes were a bit darker underneath the starry sky with less light to reflect off of them, and the quality made them look gentle. “No, you’ve gotta make sure Mina stays interested in Todo.” 
You can tell he’s just joking, but you respond as if he’s serious anyways. “That was never part of the agreement,” you say, “besides, I don’t really think that’s necessary. She seems to be pretty taken with him already.”
He laughs. “And you’re not worried about that?”
“What’s there to worry about?” You ask.
“I don’t know, the fact they hit it off so fast?” He shrugs and you feel the friction of the movement against your shoulder.
“Hmm, no. Mina’s a smart girl, she’s good at sniffing out those red flags,” you say assuredly before lifting a suspicious eyebrow at him, “should I be worried? He's your friend. Enlighten me.”
Gojo shakes his head musingly at your concern. “Todo’s a good guy,” he says in a soft voice.
“He’s not on the soccer team, right? I didn’t see him the past couple of times I was on the field,” you say with realization.
“Nah, he’s just a mad lad I met in my freshman year econ class. We’ve been friends ever since,” he says, swaying his knee from side to side. “He’s the one that got me to join the frat.”
You two are silent for a moment, listening to the noise of the wind through the trees and crickets chirping in the distance. The previous anxiety you had from the night completely dissipated into peacefulness instead, and the man beside you was responsible for that shift. 
“Can you tell me what that offer was that you were so excited about earlier this week?” he asks.
You look up to the sky briefly, trying to remember what he was talking about. “Oh. I might be able to publish the photos I take of the game next week to the sports recap in the school newsletter,” you say.
He turns his head to look at you, eyes widened. “Woah, seriously? That’s so cool. Can you make sure I look hot?”
You roll your eyes and go back to resting your chin on your knees. “Sure.” 
A comfortable silence settles before he’s speaking again. “What inspired you to be a film photographer?” He’s turning his body so he’s facing you a bit more directly. 
“Well, the end goal is film movie making…but my professor says that it’s important to understand the art of film photography before that,” you say, twiddling with the zipper of his jacket. “He says that ‘if a filmmaker cannot master the single frame shot, then how can they possibly put together a film composed of a million of them’?” 
Gojo is humming beside you and nodding in agreement. He turns away from you to face forward again and he starts tapping his foot on the pavement of the road. “Huh. That’s kind of similar to something coach says during drills.” 
You glance over at him, a little surprised. He continues to stare forward with a somewhat innocent expression on his face, and then you can practically see the moment another question pops up into his head. 
“Why don’t you make your Instagram public? Your photos would probably get a lot more views or likes that way,” he says in an excited tone, like he’s cracked some code. 
You let out a small laugh and bury your face into your knees, your voice sounding muffled when you speak. “I did have it public for a while. Until a troll spammed a bunch of hate comments on my posts and I quickly switched it to private after that.” Saying it out loud, you felt a bit silly. You’re apprehensive as you say the next few words. “I guess I’m scared that I’m not good enough to be acknowledged or successful, and that somehow other people will see that truth before I can.”
“Oh come on, y/n,” he’s saying beside you, gently nudging your arm with his elbow. The contact causes your breath to catch in your throat. “You just have to go for it. You can’t accomplish anything if you don’t face your fears.” When you watch those words leave his mouth, you notice he now has a thoughtful expression as he stares ahead to the other side of the road.
Another beat of silence goes by. “Why did you start playing soccer?” you ask.
He’s quiet for a long time as he blinks, to the point where you’re unsure if he even heard your question, but then he finally answers. “My dad used to play in college. He introduced me to the sport when I was younger and I fell in love with it.” Your perk up slightly and tip your head to the side in curiosity. He’s looking down at his lap now.
“That’s really wonderful, Satoru. Was he also center forward in college?” When you ask him this, you don’t miss the way his eyebrows pinch together for a split second before his expression relaxes again. 
“Yeah, he was,” he responds, “he got injured in his last year, though. Never got to play after that.” There’s an inflection at the end of his sentence that makes you think he’s about to say more but he doesn’t. 
Your face softens when you see him stare down at the curb with a slightly troubled expression. In a moment of tenacity, you place your hand on his thigh and his eyes widen when he sees the movement before he’s looking over at you.
“I’m sure he’s really proud of you,” you say softly, your hand reaching up to brush a few strands of his hair away from his eyes. Both of you are shocked at the intimate gesture and you’re quick to withdraw your hand. 
Your faces are close, his side still pressed against yours, and neither of you break eye contact. You take a moment to study the handsome features of his face and your heart aches a little. The cold air has you licking your lips and Gojo’s eyes dart to them, gaze lingering, and you blink slowly when he leans forward slightly. Blue eyes find yours again and he stills himself, searching your face for something, and when he doesn’t see it he continues to lean forward and you lean towards him too. And then his lips press against yours, so chaste and so light that it’s possible you could have imagined it, but just when you feel his warm hand cup your face and he’s about to deepen the kiss, a loud honking noise startles the two of you and you both jump, pulling away from one another. You see Gojo’s face illuminated with bright golden lighting as he winces and holds up one of his hands in front of his face to shield himself from being blinded by it. 
You turn your head to the left towards the source of the light and see a tow truck approaching. “Hey! Is this the flat and windshield crack?” you hear the driver shout out from where his head was stuck out the window.
You’re speechless, cheeks feeling flushed from the realization that Gojo had just kissed you, and you turn to look at him. He silently stands up with a weary exhale and a calm expression on his face and then shoves his hands into his pockets. “Yeah, it is.” He makes his way over to the tow truck and you hear him make conversation with the driver as well as the man in the passenger seat. You’re still sitting stunned on the curb, bringing your fingers up to gently touch your lips that were still searing from earlier. Gojo’s suddenly standing in front of you and you’re staring at his legs before you tip your head back up to look at him.
“Do you have any valuables in your car?” he asks, jerking his head in the direction of your car.
“Ah…my phone and my tote bag,” you say. He crouches down in front of you, earnest eyes level with yours, and his hand reaches into the pocket of his jacket where you had stashed your keys. He removes only your car key from the ring, handing the set of other keys back to you, and then he’s unlocking your car to get your stuff out of it.
You remain on the curb, watching as Gojo handles the entire interaction with the tow truck helpers. When they’ve successfully anchored your car to the tow truck and one of the men comes around to shake Gojo’s hand, you see him reach into his pocket, pulling out his wallet and handing the man some cash. You stand up in a bit of a panic and head over. 
The tow truck is already pulling away with your car from the curb when you make it in front of Gojo. He hands you a business card with the towing company information on it and then looks down at you with a mild demeanor, letting out a long exhale. “Ready to go home? You’ve had a long night.”
Exhaustion suddenly consumes your entire being and you hesitantly nod. 
The interior of Gojo’s car is nice. It’s clean, smells like him and pine, with nice leather seats that have warmers. You’re still wearing his jacket, clenching it tightly around you, as he inputs your apartment address into his GPS and starts to drive you home.
Neither of you say a word to one another during the ride. You watch his hand tighten its grip at the top of the steering wheel occasionally as he drives. He turns his car into the entrance of your apartment complex and parks in the loading zone. You watch as he makes his way out of the car to the passenger side door, opening it for you. You step outside and thank him.
“It’s okay, I’ll head inside from here,” you say, already feeling like you’ve caused him enough trouble. You abruptly remember that Mina isn’t home and the realization that you’ll be all alone tonight creates a hollow feeling in your chest.
He raises an eyebrow at you. “Come on,” he says, walking past you to make his way to the elevator and pressing the up button. It dings before immediately opening and he walks inside like he’s the one that lives here. He places a hand out to hold the door sensors when he sees that you don’t follow him inside. You jump out of the mild trance you were in and quickly rush in before he withdraws his hand and the elevator door shuts. 
“Which floor?” He asks, finger hovering over the control pad. You tell him three. 
Once you reach the third floor, you step out into the hallway and he follows suit. Your apartment was just seven units down towards the right and the two of you eventually made it to the door. You turn around to look up at him. His expression becomes slightly distressed and when you don’t say anything to him, he shoves his hands further into his pockets and sways back and forth slightly. 
“Alright, mission accomplished, I got you home,” he says with a forced jovial tone, a hand rubbing the back of his neck. You notice he does that when he seems nervous about something.
Your mind recalls the kiss from earlier, the feeling of Gojo’s lips on yours, the heat of his body pressed up against you in the cold, the tender way his hand held your face still so he could have more of you, only for it to be cut short. Your heart is beating fast in your chest and your cheeks flush with warmth. He’s looking down at you intently and you’re looking up at him pensively. 
You didn’t want to admit it to yourself. Not yet.
Your hands reach into your tote bag to pull out the keys to your apartment. “Yes, home.” He watches you jingle the metal in your hands. “Thank you.”
“Anytime,” he says and he takes a step back. Turning around, you push your key into the keyhole with shaking hands, turning it, and open the door to your apartment, letting yourself inside. You look at him from the entryway with the door still ajar. 
“Good night, take it easy,” he says to you.
“Thanks, you too.” And then he’s out of your sight as you shut the door.
You lean back against the front door, letting out a sigh and biting down on your lip, the thumping of your heart pertinent throughout your entire body. There was a lingering truth to all of the emotions that you’ve been having recently. It followed you in the early hours of the morning, it followed you as you tried to fall asleep at night, it was present in the silence, lurking in the dark, and it was there with you tonight for every second that he was by your side.
You had feelings for Gojo Satoru. 
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a/n. thanks sooo much for reading and i hope you enjoyed aaa idk this week felt off for my writing for some reason but i heavily edited it so i hope it came out okay in the end.
➸ take me to chapter six!
tag list: @who-can-touch-my-boob @getitsatoru
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rayaaani · 2 months ago
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𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐧𝐞𝐞𝐝𝐥𝐞.
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𝐏𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: fem!reader x piercer!se-mi
𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 : smut, semi has a tongue piercing cause why not , pain kink and dacryphilia if you squint really hard, dom!se-mi,inexperienced reader, mentions of blood and alcohol , reader is HAWTTTT.
𝐍𝐨𝐭𝐞: I am terrible at writing smut but passed my English a levels with flying colours so literally everything else is better but I hope you enjoy my first fic and pls request stuff for me to write🙏
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The breakup had left a hollow ache inside you. At first, you tried to convince yourself it wasn’t a big deal. People broke up every day, didn’t they? But as the days stretched into weeks, the reality sank in: they’d chosen someone else over you. The betrayal stung more than you were willing to admit.
Eunji, ever the faithful friend, was quick to notice your decline. One evening, after you canceled plans for the third time that week, she stormed into your apartment with wine, snacks, and a pointed determination to drag you out of your funk.
“You can’t keep moping around,” she said, tossing a throw pillow at you as you sulked on the couch. “You’re too hot to let them ruin you.”
You snorted, but the laughter felt foreign. “Hot? Eunji, I’ve barely showered this week.”
“Exactly my point,” she said, grabbing your hand and pulling you up. “We’re doing a makeover. You’re going to remind yourself—and everyone else—exactly who the hell you are.”
You rolled your eyes, but deep down, you couldn’t deny the idea had merit. That night, Eunji introduced the seed of rebellion: “Have you ever thought about dyeing your hair?
The next day, you stared at yourself in the mirror, box of red hair dye in hand.
The breakup had left you craving change, and this was your first step. The fiery red was bold, brash, and unapologetic—the exact opposite of how you felt. But as you worked the dye into your hair, you imagined yourself as the confident, fearless woman you wanted to become.
When you rinsed the dye out and styled your hair into loose, messy waves, you barely recognized the woman staring back. The red brought out a new intensity in your eyes, and the bold color paired with your nose piercing gave you an edge that felt exciting and liberating.
You snapped a picture and sent it to Eunji.
“Holy shit,” she texted back almost immediately. “You look like a goddamn rockstar. I’m coming over.”
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“You need a new piercing to go with that hair,” Eunji announced as she lounged on your couch that evening.
“Piercing?” you echoed, raising an eyebrow.
“Yeah. Something edgy. Like an eyebrow piercing. Ooh, or a lip ring!”
You laughed but found yourself considering it. “Do you have a place in mind?”
Eunji’s face lit up. “Black Needle Studio. Trust me, they’re the best. And,” she added with a smirk, “the piercer? Se-Mi? Hot. As. Fuck.”
“Hot, huh?” you said, intrigued despite yourself.
“Hot doesn’t even begin to cover it,” Eunji said, sitting up to look you in the eye. “She’s tall, gorgeous, and has these tattoos that’ll make you want to crawl into her lap. Her voice is low and smooth, like she knows exactly what she’s doing to you. And when she looks at you? It’s game over.”
You swallowed hard, trying to ignore the sudden flutter in your stomach. “You’re overselling this.”
“Nope,” Eunji said, grinning. “Book the appointment. You’ll see.”
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The moment you stepped into Black Needle Studio, you understood what Eunji had meant.
Se-Mi was standing at the counter, casually flipping through a clipboard. Her fitted black tank top revealed toned arms covered in intricate tattoos, and her dark jeans clung to her figure in all the right ways. She had an aura of effortless confidence, like she owned the world and couldn’t care less if anyone knew it.
Her dark eyes lifted as you walked in, locking onto you with an intensity that made your stomach flip.
“Here for a piercing?” she asked, her voice low and smooth.
You nodded, suddenly feeling self-conscious under her gaze. “Yeah. Eyebrow piercing.”
Her lips curled into a faint smirk. “Good choice. Let’s get you set up.”
She led you to a private room, her movements fluid and purposeful. As she pulled on gloves and prepped the needle, the air between you felt charged.
“So,” she said, her voice cutting through the tension, “is this your first time?”
You shook your head. “I have a nose piercing.”
Her eyes flicked to your nose, lingering for a moment. “Looks good on you. You’ll rock the eyebrow, too.”
Your cheeks flushed under her gaze. “Thanks.”
As she cleaned and marked the area, her fingers brushed against your skin lightly, sending shivers down your spine.
“This might sting,” she said, her tone almost teasing. “Think you can handle it?”
You nodded, though your heart was pounding.
“Deep breath,” she instructed. The needle went through, and you let out a quiet whimper at the sharp pain.
“Doing okay?” she asked, her voice softer now.
“Yeah,” you said, your voice barely above a whisper.
“Good,” she said, stepping back to admire her work. “You did great.”
When she handed you the mirror, you couldn’t help but smile. The piercing was perfect, adding a boldness to your face that made you feel invincible.
“Looks amazing,” she said, her smirk returning. “You wear it well.”
Your heart fluttered at her words, and you couldn’t help but wonder if she meant more than just the piercing.
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That night, you couldn’t stop thinking about her. Everything about se-mi ,her confidence, her voice, the way her hands had lingered just a second longer than necessary—was etched into your mind.
You called Eunji the moment you got home.
“She’s unreal,” you said, pacing your apartment. “I mean, you said she was hot, but this is next-level. She has this presence. Like she knows exactly how to make you feel—”
“Like putty in her hands?” Eunji finished, laughing.
“Exactly!” you said, flopping onto your couch. “And her tattoos… God, Eunji, I don’t even know how I managed to form coherent sentences.”
“She sounds dangerous,” Eunji teased. “In the best way.”
You groaned. “What am I supposed to do? Just sit here and think about her all night?”
“Why not go out and celebrate?” Eunji suggested. “You look amazing with that new piercing. Let’s hit the club and show it off.”
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You didn’t notice your ex until it was too late. They were across the room, laughing with the same “friend” they’d sworn was platonic. Your stomach churned, but you refused to let it ruin your night.
“Forget them,” Eunji said, pulling you back onto the dance floor.
The air in the club felt heavy with anticipation as you made your way toward the bar, but the presence of your ex caught your eye before you could focus on anything else. There they were, looking carefree and laughing with their friends, completely unaware of the storm swirling inside of you. It was almost maddening how unaffected they seemed, how easily they were moving on. But you? You felt like you were drowning in a sea of emotions, and you were desperate for an escape.
The alcohol had started to do its job, loosening your inhibitions and sharpening the edge of your boldness. The red satin dress you were wearing felt like armor—sexy, confident, a reflection of someone you didn’t recognize but was beginning to like.
As you walked, the club’s lights and music seemed to blur around you. The world was spinning slightly, but in a way that was freeing. Eunji, as usual, was by your side, guiding you through the crowd, but you didn’t care about much else except the burning need to feel alive again, to remind yourself that you were in control of your own life.
“I’m going to have fun tonight,” you muttered to Eunji, your voice slightly slurred.
Eunji grinned, her eyes alight with mischief. “Hell yeah you are. You’re looking amazing tonight. Just wait until you see how everyone reacts.”
You didn’t answer, too distracted by the flashes of neon lights and the rhythmic thump of the bass, which seemed to vibrate through your entire body. Your head felt light, the alcohol mixing with the adrenaline of the night, but something else was there too—a raw, burning desire to make a statement. To make someone feel something.
You spotted your ex across the room again, standing by the bar, and something twisted inside you. You hadn’t meant to walk into this situation looking for revenge, but here you were, wanting to show them that you were doing just fine without them. You weren’t the same girl who had left their apartment a few weeks ago, broken and lost. You were someone else now—someone better.
“Let’s have some fun,” you whispered to Eunji as you let go of her hand, pulling away from the crowd.
You didn’t know where you were going, but your feet seemed to carry you across the dance floor, past groups of people grinding to the beat, the alcohol in your system making you feel bold, almost daring. You were feeling good, feeling unstoppable.
And then you saw her.
Se-Mi was sitting off to the side, casually talking to a group of her friends. She hadn’t seen you yet, but you saw her, and the sight of her made something shift deep inside you.
She was stunning.
Her dark hair cascaded over her shoulders, her lips slightly curved into a smile as she laughed. You could see the way the light caught her piercing, the coolness in her demeanor that had drawn you in the first time you saw her. Se-Mi was magnetic—impossible to ignore. You couldn’t take your eyes off her, despite the fog of alcohol clouding your thoughts.
She didn’t see you yet, didn’t notice how your breath caught in your throat. But you were done standing back.
The plan had been to show your ex that you were moving on. But now, the impulse to do something—anything—to capture attention overwhelmed you. Without even thinking about it, you sauntered closer to Se-Mi’s booth, her laugh still ringing in the air around you. She didn’t look up, too absorbed in the conversation with her friends. You had to do something.
The alcohol in your system surged, and suddenly you found yourself standing right in front of her, just a few feet away. It was like the world had disappeared, leaving only the need to be seen, to make an impression.
Without warning, you closed the space between you, stepping forward and pressing your lips against hers. The kiss was clumsy, uncoordinated. You hadn’t planned it. But in that moment, the need to feel something—anything—drove you to act.
The world seemed to stop for a moment, the noise of the club fading into the background. Se-Mi didn’t pull away, but she didn’t lean into the kiss either. When you pulled back, her dark eyes locked onto yours, filled with something you couldn’t quite decipher.
“Care to explain what that was about?” she asked, her voice low and laced with amusement.
You swallowed hard, the realization of what you’d just done crashing over you. “I… I’m sorry. I didn’t mean—”
It was over in an instant.
Your cheeks burned, and before you could say anything else, Eunji appeared, grabbing your arm. “Time to dance!” she said, pulling you toward the dance floor.
You glanced back at Se-Mi as Eunji dragged you away. She was still watching you, her expression unreadable.
The music was still pounding in your ears as you stumbled off the dance floor, the alcohol swirling inside you, making everything feel just a bit hazy. You needed to get away from the chaos, to process what had just happened. Your head was spinning—both from the alcohol and from the memory of that kiss with Se-Mi.
You found Eunji at the bar, chatting with some random guy, but when she saw the look on your face, she immediately stopped talking and raised an eyebrow.
“Hey, what’s wrong?” she asked, her voice softening as she noticed the way you were swaying slightly on your feet.
“I… I think I did something really stupid,” you mumbled, leaning against the bar for support. You swallowed thickly, the weight of what had happened crashing down on you. “I kissed Se-Mi.”
Eunji blinked, her lips parting in surprise. “What?!”
“Yeah, I don’t know what the hell I was thinking. I just… I was drunk, and I wanted to make my ex jealous, and—” you paused, exhaling shakily, “it just happened. And now I don’t know what to do.”
Eunji took a long pause, looking at you carefully. “You kissed her? Like, Se-Mi kissed you?” she repeated, trying to process it.
You nodded, your face flushed. “Yeah, it was stupid. It was impulsive. I don’t even know why I did it.”
“But…” Eunji trailed off, glancing at you, her eyes gleaming with something you couldn’t quite place. “That means you’re going back, right? You’ve already booked your second session with her.”
Your stomach churned as you thought about it. “Yeah,” you admitted, biting your lip. “I already booked the second piercing… a snake eye piercing.”
Eunji raised an eyebrow. “So… you’re telling me you kissed her, and now you have to go back to her for a piercing?”
You nodded slowly, a heavy sigh escaping your lips. “Yeah. It’s going to be so awkward. I don’t even know what to say. Like, what if she brings it up?”
Eunji’s smirk only grew wider as she took a long sip of her drink. “You know, I think this is actually perfect,” she teased, clearly enjoying the chaos unfolding in your life. “You’re going back to her. She’s the one who’s going to be awkward now, not you.”
You couldn’t help but groan at the thought of the piercing session. It wasn’t just the awkwardness that made you nervous, though. It was the way your body was still humming with the memory of that kiss. The way your lips tingled when you thought about Se-Mi. You knew it wasn’t just a drunken mistake—it was something else. Something deeper.
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Two days later, you found yourself standing in front of the piercing studio again, your hands trembling slightly as you reached for the door. The memory of your last visit—of Se-Mi’s steady hands and the way she had made you feel—rushed back, causing your heart to race.
You had managed to keep the details of the kiss to yourself, pushing the awkwardness aside, but now, as you entered the studio once again, you couldn’t help but feel that same tension between you and her. Would she bring it up? Would she make it awkward? You had no idea, but you were about to find out.
When you stepped into the studio, Se-Mi was there, just like last time, waiting behind the piercing counter. She looked as stunning as ever, her dark eyes sharp and confident as she gave you a small, knowing smile.
“Back again?” she said, her voice smooth and casual, as if nothing had happened. But there was something in the way her gaze lingered on you that told you she hadn’t forgotten.
You swallowed, trying to appear composed, but your voice was a little shaky. “Yeah. I… I’m here for the snake eye piercing.”
Se-Mi’s smile grew just a fraction wider, her lips curving up in a way that made your stomach flutter. “You’ve got good taste,” she said, her eyes glinting as she motioned for you to take a seat. “Ready for this?”
You nodded, but inside, you were anything but ready. The air felt thicker this time, charged with the underlying tension from your last encounter.
As you sat in the piercing chair, Se-Mi moved closer, her body leaning over you as she set everything up. The scent of her cologne mixed with the sterile smell of the studio, and you couldn’t help but notice the way her hands brushed against your skin as she prepped for the piercing.
“Okay,” she said, her voice a little softer now, a little more intimate, as she cleaned the area around your lip. “This one’s going to sting a little more than the last one.”
You nodded, your heartbeat quickening as you tried to keep your breathing steady. The proximity between you two felt intense, and the memory of that kiss—the softness of her lips, the heat of the moment—seemed to hang in the air like a shadow. You didn’t know if you should bring it up, if it was even worth mentioning. The awkwardness of the situation made it hard to think clearly.
Se-Mi’s fingers hovered over your lip, and you swore you could feel the electricity crackling between you as she looked into your eyes, her expression serious for just a moment. “You’re sure you want this?” she asked, her voice quiet, a little too soft.
You met her gaze, feeling the weight of the question, of everything that had happened between you two. For a brief second, it felt like the world around you stopped. You couldn’t deny that there was something magnetic, something dangerous in the way she was looking at you.
The silence between you and Se-Mi grew thick as you sat in the piercing chair, her hands moving with practiced precision as she prepped for your snake eye piercing. There was a strange kind of intimacy in the way she touched your skin, a closeness that sent shivers down your spine. She was so close, her body almost brushing against yours as she positioned herself in front of you, her eyes scanning your face with an intensity that made your pulse quicken.
You felt the weight of her gaze as she wiped the area around your tongue with antiseptic, her fingers gently caressing your lips as she prepared the piercing. You swallowed hard, trying to calm the nerves that suddenly fluttered in your chest, but the air in the room felt charged. It was more than just the physical closeness—there was an undeniable tension between you two, something that simmered beneath the surface, an unspoken understanding from that kiss you’d shared at the club.
Se-Mi’s voice broke through the silence, low and steady as she reassured you. “This one’s going to sting a bit more than the last one,” she said softly, her eyes flicking up to meet yours.
You nodded, but your breath caught in your throat. The words didn’t make you nervous—what really made your heart race was the way she was looking at you. There was something about the way her gaze lingered on your lips, the way her fingers gently cupped your chin as she adjusted you, that made everything inside you feel tight and electric.
“Relax,” she murmured, her tone unexpectedly soothing. “You’re going to be fine. Just breathe.”
You tried to breathe, tried to calm yourself, but your mind was still reeling from the kiss, from the memory of Se-Mi’s lips on yours, and from the way the chemistry between you two seemed to thrum louder every time you were close.
“Okay,” Se-Mi said, her fingers tracing the outline of your lip before she positioned the needle. “Stick your tongue out for me.”
You obeyed without thinking, the action feeling almost instinctual as you extended your tongue toward her. Se-Mi’s eyes locked on yours for a brief moment, her lips pressing together as she focused on the task at hand. The intimacy of the moment hit you all at once, the proximity between you both becoming almost overwhelming.
She was so close. You could feel the heat of her breath against your lips as she hovered over you, her fingertips brushing against the skin around your mouth. Every small movement felt deliberate, charged with something deeper.
The tension was unbearable.
And then, before you could fully prepare yourself, you felt the sharp sting of the needle as Se-Mi pierced your tongue. A soft whimper escaped your lips as the pain radiated through your mouth, your whole body tensing from the sudden sensation. The sharp discomfort mixed with a strange sense of pleasure, a rush that made your head spin.
Se-Mi’s eyes flickered up to meet yours immediately, her gaze intense. “It’s okay, just breathe,” she said, her voice much softer now, almost as if she was aware of the sound that had slipped from you. There was something undeniably intimate about it—the way she was so close, the way her eyes softened just slightly as she watched you.
You couldn’t help but notice the way her lips parted slightly, her focus not just on the piercing but on you—on your reactions. It was as if she was studying you, waiting for the next shift in your expression. You could feel the heat in your face, your chest tight from both the pain and the strange way her attention made you feel.
As she adjusted the needle for the second part of the piercing, you whimpered again, the pain making your body tense up. But this time, Se-Mi’s fingers brushed against your lips in a way that made your heart skip. She didn’t pull away immediately. Instead, she lingered there, as if savoring the moment.
“Almost done,” Se-Mi whispered, her voice low and unexpectedly tender.
You nodded, your tongue still extended, your body still trembling slightly from the intensity of the experience. But what lingered in your mind wasn’t just the pain—it was the way Se-Mi’s eyes had locked on yours, the way she seemed to be taking in every detail of you. It was the way her fingers had brushed against your skin, the warmth of her touch making your heart race.
Finally, after what felt like an eternity, Se-Mi finished the piercing. She slowly withdrew the needle, her fingers gently adjusting the jewelry in place. Your breathing was heavy, the pain still lingering but fading as the piercing settled.
Se-Mi moved back slightly, her gaze lingering on you for a moment longer than necessary, as if evaluating the change. There was something different in the air now, something thick and unspoken between you two. She reached for a small tissue and gently dabbed at your lips, her fingers lingering longer than necessary as she wiped away the trace of blood.
“You did great,” she said, her voice soft but with a hint of something deeper in it now, something you couldn’t quite place.
But as she looked at you, you realized it wasn’t just the piercing that had shifted between you two. It was the connection—unspoken, undeniable—that you couldn’t ignore anymore.
“Thanks,” you whispered, your voice a little shaky, still caught in the whirlwind of emotions and sensations. You couldn’t quite pinpoint what you were feeling—pain, relief, and something else entirely, something that made your pulse quicken.
Se-Mi’s gaze didn’t break from yours as she handed you a small mirror to examine the new piercing. You took it, but your hands were trembling slightly, not just from the aftereffects of the piercing but from the way Se-Mi was watching you. It was as if she could see straight through you, like she knew exactly what you were thinking, what you were feeling.
The room felt too small now, the air too thick, as Se-Mi hovered over you, the aftermath of your piercing session still lingering. Her fingers had just finished securing the jewelry in place, but it was clear that something else was hanging in the air, something more potent and undeniable. You could feel her presence radiating toward you, and the space between you two seemed to shrink with every breath you took.
Se-Mi leaned against the counter beside you, her eyes never leaving yours. You didn’t need to look at her for long to know what was coming. You had hoped she wouldn’t bring it up—but you knew she would. The kiss.
She crossed her arms over her chest, and for a moment, the dominant energy she gave off was overwhelming. There was no softness in her gaze now, no question about it—this was not the Se-Mi you had known before. This was the one who commanded attention, who knew exactly what she wanted, and she was looking right at you as though she was daring you to say something.
“About that kiss…” Se-Mi’s voice was steady, almost too calm, like she was savoring the control she had over the moment. The words hung in the air, thick with the tension that had been building between you two since the first time your lips met.
You hesitated, biting your lip as your mind raced. That kiss had been so impulsive, so reckless, but now, in this charged atmosphere, you could feel the weight of it. You could feel the heat of Se-Mi’s gaze on you, the way her presence filled the room, making it impossible for you to look away.
“You think it was just about making your ex jealous, don’t you?” she asked, her eyes narrowing slightly, as if she was reading you, seeing right through the facade. “But I don’t believe that. Not for a second.”
You swallowed hard. She was right. It hadn’t been just about your ex—it had been about something else, something deeper that you couldn’t quite name.
“I—” Your voice faltered as you tried to explain, but Se-Mi wasn’t interested in hearing any excuses.
She stepped closer, the movement deliberate, the space between you two shrinking as she towered over you. Her gaze locked onto yours, her presence commanding. There was nothing gentle in the way she looked at you now—just pure, unrelenting focus.
“You don’t have to say anything,” Se-Mi interrupted, her tone low, almost dangerous. “You kissed me because you wanted to. Don’t try to lie to yourself.” She leaned in slightly, her breath warm against your skin. “And now… I think you want something more.”
The words hit you like a jolt of electricity. You felt your pulse race, your heart hammering in your chest as your body betrayed your thoughts. You knew what she was implying, and the way she was looking at you—no, the way she was claiming you—made it impossible to ignore what was happening.
Se-Mi was right. You wanted more. You wanted her.
You opened your mouth to speak, but no words came out. All you could do was stare back at her, your body tense, your breath shallow as her proximity consumed you.
“You wanted to make him jealous, but now,” Se-Mi’s voice dropped lower, laced with dark amusement, “you’ve got me wondering if you want to make me jealous.”
Your breath caught in your throat, your lips parting slightly as you tried to process what she was saying. But Se-Mi didn’t give you a chance to respond. Instead, her hand shot out, gripping your chin with firm fingers, tilting your face upward.
“Don’t worry, I’m not mad. But I think it’s time we finish what we started.” Her tone left no room for argument. It was clear that this wasn’t a question anymore. She was in control.
Before you could react, Se-Mi pulled you forward by your chin, her lips crashing into yours in a kiss that was anything but gentle. It was demanding, hungry, and she made sure you felt every bit of it. Her tongue slid into your mouth, bold and forceful, taking control of the kiss as though she owned it—and you.
Your hands instinctively reached for her arms, your fingers digging into the muscles of her forearm as her body pressed closer. The kiss deepened, and you could feel the heat radiating off of her, her chest pressed against yours, making it impossible to ignore how badly you needed her.
Se-Mi pulled away, her lips just a hair’s breadth from yours. She stared down at you with an intensity that sent a wave of heat rushing through you. “You like this, don’t you?” she whispered, her voice thick with dominance. “You like the way I make you feel.”
You nodded instinctively, your breath ragged as your body reacted to the dominance in her voice. She was right. Every second with her felt electrified, like she was pulling at every nerve in your body, forcing you to feel everything all at once.
With a sudden, decisive movement, Se-Mi gripped your waist and spun you in the chair, forcing you to face the mirror. “Look at yourself,” she commanded, her voice low and stern. “You’re a mess, and I haven’t even started yet.”
You glanced at your reflection, seeing yourself in a new light. Your lips were swollen from the kiss, your cheeks flushed with heat, and your eyes… they held the same hunger that Se-Mi’s gaze did.
When you turned to look back at her, Se-Mi’s expression was a mix of satisfaction and something darker, something more possessive. She stepped closer again, her hands moving to your shoulders as she leaned in, her lips brushing your ear. “I’m not done with you yet.”
Your body trembled at her touch, the tension between you both unbearable. You didn’t want her to stop. You wanted more—wanted her to claim you, to make you hers completely.
And Se-Mi seemed to know exactly how to do that.
Se-Mi’s gaze sharpened, her expression hardening as she took a step back, assessing you with a look that left no room for defiance. The air between you two crackled with intensity as she stood tall, her body language exuding authority.
“Sit back down,” she commanded, her voice firm, almost cold. “I haven’t finished yet.”
Your heart skipped a beat at the force in her tone. There was no mistaking her intent. She wasn’t asking; she was telling you, and the power behind her words sent a shiver down your spine. Without thinking, you obeyed, moving quickly to sit back in the chair where she had initially positioned you, your body already betraying you with the pulse of anticipation.
Se-Mi didn’t waste any time. As soon as you were seated, she moved closer, her body encroaching upon yours in a way that felt deliberate, as though she was making sure you understood who was in control.
“Good,” she murmured, her voice laced with authority and a hint of satisfaction.
Her eyes narrowed as she watched you with an intensity that made your heart race. There was no hesitation in her movements as she shifted to her knees, her posture predatory and confident. She reached for the hem of your skirt, her fingers brushing against the fabric with purpose, her gaze never leaving yours.
“Always playing coy,” she murmured, her voice low and laced with a hint of amusement. She tugged at the fabric with a firm motion, the sudden action pulling the skirt down, leaving you exposed to her gaze. The way she looked at you made your breath hitch—there was no mistaking her control, no room left for doubt.
You couldn’t help but let out a soft gasp, the feeling of her hands so close to your skin sending a shiver down your spine. Semi leaned in just enough for you to feel her breath against your ear, the proximity causing your pulse to quicken.
“Is this what you wanted?” she whispered, her voice dripping with both challenge and satisfaction.
Se-Mi’s eyes glinted with something darker as she stood in front of you, her posture exuding dominance. She had moved with such deliberate precision, and now, with your skirt tugged down, the air between you felt charged, suffocating with the weight of her presence.
You opened your mouth, but no words came out—your breath caught in your throat as her gaze never wavered from you. The silence between you two felt thick, like something was waiting to snap.
“Fuck I’ve wanted you since I first saw you walk through that studio” her voice low and hungry.
Her lips curled into a smirk, her eyes dark with intent. She took a step closer, her movements slow, measured, and with each step, the distance between you two seemed to disappear.
“You’re not going to ignore me now, are you?” she asked, her voice low and dangerous, her eyes narrowing slightly. “Answer me.”
You stayed silent, too overwhelmed by the intensity of the moment to speak, the words locked in your throat. Your pulse quickened as she leaned in just enough for you to feel the heat of her breath against your ear.
Se-Mi’s hand shot out suddenly, gripping your chin with firm fingers, forcing you to look directly into her eyes. “I asked you a question,” she said, her voice unwavering. “You’re going to answer me, or I’ll stop right here.”
Her words hit you like a punch to the gut. The threat was clear, but it was the way she said it—the unyielding certainty in her tone—that made you freeze.
Her grip tightened slightly, a warning, and she leaned in just enough to make sure you heard her clearly. “Tell me. What do you want?”
The pressure in the air was unbearable. You swallowed hard, your thoughts a jumbled mess as you tried to process everything, but her presence, her control over the situation, left you with no choice but to answer. You couldn’t risk her stopping.
“I want you,” you breathed out, your voice barely audible, but it was enough. The words, the truth, were out in the open now.
“That’s what I like to hear.” She smiles at you , sending you through a whirlwind of emotions. You were in a daze, trying to process that this was actually happening, you? Getting fucked by this hot piercer? No way. You were caught off guard when she shoved her fingers into you.
You bite back a moan, holding your hand to your mouth
“No princess, let me hear you” she gawks as she snatches your hand away and continues thrusting her fingers into you, her cold jewellery adding to the sensation.
“S-Se-mi…” you gasp, your voice shaky.
She cuts you off, her tone sharp yet commanding. “Enough. Let me take care of you,” she says, her eyes never leaving yours. “This is what you wanted, isn’t it?” She then latches her mouth onto your clit without warning, navigating and exploring into you and she continues to scissor her fingers into you roughly.
Is that a tounge piercing?
Tears start to spill from the corners of your eyes from stimulation , it just felt too good. She looked up at you with her beautiful brown eyes, maintaining eye contact and she indulged into you.
She was so experienced. She flicked her tongue skillfully across your cunt, capturing all segments of flavour in her tongue and savouring the taste. She occasionally presses kisses into your thighs admiring all aspects of your body “you taste so sweet~” she says seductively, making you just want to jump and kiss her.
She curls her finger into you , hitting your g-spot leaving you to rip out loud moans into this echoey room.
“I’m gonna-“
“I can feel you tensing around me,cum for me princess” and upon hearing her sweet words. You came on the spot, your sticky arousal coming out and leaving a trace on the chair, on semis face and on her fingers.
She slowly licked her lips, her eyes locking onto yours. “For someone so feisty, you surprisingly taste sweet,” she remarked, her voice still calm but laced with an unmistakable edge.
You found yourself unable to meet her gaze, a flush creeping up your neck as you shyly looked away, the heat of the moment overwhelming you.
She smirked, her tone darkening just slightly. “But I’m not finished with you yet. You still owe me.”
You looked at her dumbfounded, unsure of what to do and how to please her “don’t look so confused now princess, you heard what I said so get to work.” She said feistily and all you could do was obey her.
You pull her into a hot kiss while her hands snake up to your neck, choking you lightly as she deepens the kiss, your tongues gliding across each other in a messy manner. This kiss was fully of urgency, something dark. Your new piercing in your mouth arousing her.
You then go down caressing her body and leaving occasional pecks to place such as her collarbone and side. You stare at her body for a second, staring in anticipation , you’d never done this to a girl before. “what are you waiting for?” Semi bellowed commandingly. You decide to just do what you possibly can and rip the jeans that once adorned her legs off.
You move through the layer and finally meet with her cunt. You place little kitten licks on her cunt which cause little whimpers to leave her mouth, you eventually start using longer tongue movements and suck on her clit just like she did to you and teasingly bite her clit which makes her even louder than before “you wanted me to do this aswell right?” You say teasingly and seductively “just shut up” she says, biting back moans to not let her nonchalant image crumble. Her hips buck into your mouth and she fists your hair from behind, harshly dragging it to her clit as she reaches down to grope your tits.
Her breath came in quick, uneven gasps, her hands gripping you tightly as the tension in the air she rode out her high . Her body trembled slightly, her eyes closing as she let out a soft moan of satisfaction. The intensity of the moment lingered between you two, a shared, unspoken understanding that filled the room with heat.
“So beautiful,” she whispered, her voice low and full of admiration. Her gaze softened as she held you, her hands gently guiding you closer as you collapsed against her, the warmth of her body wrapping around you in the aftermath.
After the intensity of the moment, the atmosphere between you and her softened. There was a quiet stillness in the room now, the heavy air of the moment slowly dissipating. Semi, still a bit breathless, reached for a nearby towel, her movements smooth and deliberate.
Without a word, she gently wiped you down, her touch careful as she made sure you were comfortable. Her eyes flickered to yours, a silent understanding between you two as she continued. There was something soothing about her actions, an unspoken tenderness in the way she moved.
Once she finished with you, Se-Mi stood, her posture still commanding, yet there was a softness in her expression. She handed you a fresh towel, her lips curving into a small smile. “You okay?” she asked, her voice quieter now, but no less genuine.
You nodded, feeling the weight of the moment settle between you two. The act of cleaning up was simple, but it carried with it a sense of care and connection, as if it was a small but important gesture after the intensity you had just shared.
The next morning, you sat at a café with Eunji, trying to act like everything was normal. But inside, you were anything but. You kept replaying the events of the night before, the way Se-Mi’s gaze had held yours, the unexpected intensity of everything that happened. You couldn’t shake the feeling that something had shifted between you two, something that felt too big to ignore.
“So, what happened after the piercing?” Eunji asked, clearly curious. She leaned in, eager to hear every detail, her eyes wide with anticipation.
You hesitated, unsure of how to explain what you were feeling without giving too much away. You hadn’t even fully processed everything yourself. “It was… intense,” you said, trying to sound casual. “Like, she made everything feel… so real. I don’t know how else to explain it.”
Eunji raised an eyebrow. “Real how? What do you mean?”
You paused, thinking about how to put it into words. The pull between you and Se-Mi was undeniable, but how could you explain that to your best friend without sounding completely ridiculous? “It was like… like she knew exactly what she was doing. Like she was in control, but in this way that made me feel… I don’t know, completely drawn to her.”
Eunji smiled knowingly. “Ah, I get it. You’re into her, huh?”
You sighed, nodding reluctantly. “I think I am. But I don’t know what to do about it. Everything’s so… confusing. And last night—well, it was a lot.”
Before you could say anything more, your phone buzzed on the table, breaking the moment. You glanced down, surprised to see an unknown number flashing on the screen. You hadn’t recognized the number, but there was something about it that made your stomach drop.
Eunji didn’t seem to notice, busy stirring her coffee, so you quickly unlocked your phone. A message from the unknown number appeared, and your heart raced as you opened it.
It was a video. Your mind was still spinning as you hit play, and the first few moments made your heart skip. It was a clip from the night before—your time at the piercing studio. You watched in stunned silence as the video played out, the intimate moments between you and Se-Mi playing in front of your eyes. Her gaze, the closeness, the way she’d touched you, it was all so vivid and real again.
The message beneath the video made everything feel too raw, too real.
Hey, it’s Se-Mi. I’m sorry, but you just looked too cute here.
Your breath caught in your throat, your heart pounding in your chest as the weight of what you were seeing hit you. You stared at the screen, your mind racing, unsure of how to process what you were looking at. Your phone felt like it was burning in your hands, the uncertainty of the situation making it even more intense. You had to know what Se-Mi meant, what was going on, but there was no way to ask just yet.
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@rayaaani
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suiana · 1 year ago
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your boyfriend has been acting weird lately (various yandere characters x gn reader) (ANGSTOBER DAY 2)
"babe are you-"
"can you quit talking? seriously, you're so damn annoying."
"...i only wanted to ask whether you were hungry..."
you stare at your boyfriend, lips pursed as he continues to type away on his phone. he's been like this for three weeks now. getting mad at you for no reason, cursing at you... did you do something wrong?
all you ever wanted was to be a good significant other and he's acting like he's on his period or something! jesus, can't he be a little bit more mature too?! picking fights with you for no reason, making a big fuss over nothing... and not even telling you why?!
...
you know what?
you had it with him.
"hey, what's your problem huh?! why are you so edgy nowadays huh? did i do something wrong?!"
your once loving boyfriend stares at you, eyes and mouth wide at your sudden outburst. he takes a moment to compose himself, eyebrows furrowing the second he thinks things through.
"god you're so damn stupid. I've been repeatedly telling you, haven't i? i hate you. what can't you understand?! this is why I'm always getting mad, damnit!"
you scoff at him, arms folded in front of your chest as you try to keep your cool... only for your anger to get the better of you, resulting in a screaming festival between you and your boyfriend.
"hate me? you can't expect me to believe that. not when you were literally obsessed with me up till three weeks ago?!"
"i-"
"you used to threaten people just for looking at me! you even tried to kill someone because they asked for my number! and now you want me to believe that you hate me? stop with your bullshit."
".. actually-"
"oh. are you seeing someone else? is that what this is? you're trying to make me break up with you, is that it?"
"n-... you know what? yeah, yeah it is. i want to break up with you. I've found someone else that i love more than you."
your boyfriend states, eyes dead as he stares straight at you. he breathes calmly, as if he weren't affected by this at all. meanwhile, your heart felt as though it had shattered into many tiny pieces. tears fell from your eyes, unable to be held back any longer as you broke down, falling to your knees as the male just stares at you stoicly.
"let's never see each other again."
he mumbles, turning on his heel, swiftly leaving you alone to wallow in your sadness in the once lively apartment. shit... you hadn't expected things to end like this.
"he's a fucking jerk..."
you think through your tears, vision blurry as you clutch your chest. you really loved him and he just?? left?? how could he be so heartless?
if he didn't love you he could've just said something about it. he didn't have to be so mean and hurt your feelings before finally bringing up another person! god damnit, why did you have to fall for such a person?!
you cried, wailing as you cursed your now ex-boyfriend.
"fuck! i hate you! i hate you so much! i hope i never see you again! just disappear from my life! you just left me to die here! stupid ex-boyfriend! i hate giving you my love!"
what you didn't know however, was that your 'heartless' boyfriend had stood outside your door, frowning at your every word, regretting everything he had done up until that moment. because he had loved you too. truly.
he loved you so damn much that he wanted to tear out his hair every single time he was mean to you. he wanted to tell you that he didn't mean any single one of those hurtful words. he wanted to cry and beg for your forgiveness every single time he did anything hurtful to you.
but it was for your own good. it was to keep you safe. and if he needed to hurt you to keep you safe, he'd do it. because he loved you too much to see someone else hurt you.
and being with him meant that there was always a risk of you getting hurt. so how could he allow that to happen when it could be prevented? how could he let his selfish feelings get in the way when you were such a precious little thing? sure, he loves you and he'll do anything in his power to ensure your safety but what if he can't protect you one day?
what if one day you just... get used against him? he's a dangerous man and has a lot of enemies. surely they'll find out that you're his weakness. of course he has gotten rid of anyone who might harm you now but who's to say that there won't be more in the future?
which is why he has to severe all ties with you now. he can't risk it. because he may be strong, but he may not be strong enough for whoever may come in the future. that's why he's been doing what he's been doing-making you hate him so that it hurts less when he decides that it's time to leave. he assumes that it's working wonderfully, after all you've never once noticed his puffy eyes in the morning.
"at least... they'll be safe now."
and disappear he will, for he has too many regrets welling up in the depths of his soul from what he did to you. he'll make sure to never come across you again, instead lurking in your shadow, observing you from afar.
a star like you need not be dirtied by his presence anymore.
dazai osamu, akutagawa ryunosuke, megumi fushiguro, blade, scaramouche/wanderer, your faves<3
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itneverendshere · 9 months ago
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THE OTHER SIDE OF PARADISE - rafe cameron (+18) - four
request: "a rafe enemies to lovers 🫣 the reader is jjs sister the whole drama before but then she gets left behind on the ship and rafe ends up comforting her and then yea that’s all I got you can do whatever else the rest 😛"
warnings: gun violence; blood;
word count: 7.1k
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You woke up confused staring at the oddly familiar ceiling, filled with posters ripped from the old magazines you’d gotten at a second-hand store. When you were sixteen is sounded like a great edgy idea. 
You were home.
What the—? How? 
Sitting up, the room felt stifling, the air thick with the stale smell of old wood and the faintest hint of your father’s cigarette smoke, a scent you had hoped never to encounter again. The heavy feeling in your chest wasn’t just the dread of being back; it was the memories flooding back, threatening to drown you.
The sound of a muffled argument seeped through the thin walls, pulling you back to the present. Your heart pounded in your ears as you recognized the angry, slurred voice of your father.
He was shouting at someone, probably your brother, just like he used to. The familiar clinking of bottles and the crash of something being thrown sent a shiver down your spine.
No. This wasn't real. This couldn’t be real.
You swung your legs over the side of the bed, feeling the rough crappy carpet under your feet. You stood up shakily. The hallway stretched out before you, longer than it should have been, and the flickering light cast eerie shadows on the peeling wallpaper.
As you approached the living room, the noise grew louder, more distinct. Your father’s voice, filled with venom and rage, scared the living hell out of you.
You reached the doorway and peered in, your breath catching in your throat. There he was, towering over your JJ, his face twisted in anger. Your little brother was cowering, trying to make himself as small as possible, his eyes filled with fear. The scene was a haunting echo of so many nights you’d tried to forget.
“No,” you whispered, fear bubbling up inside you. “This isn’t happening.”
But it was.
Your father, with his disheveled hair and red-rimmed eyes, swung the bottle in his hand dangerously close to JJ’s head. Each wave of the bottle sent droplets of amber liquid flying, dotting the floor like gruesome confetti. JJ flinched with every movement, tears streaming down his cheeks, and the sight made your heart ache.
“Get out of my sight, you worthless—” your father roared, his voice a terrifying growl.
“No!” you screamed, stepping into the room before you even realized you were moving. “Stop it!”
Your father turned, his bloodshot eyes narrowing as they focused on you. For a moment, he only stared, probably to drunk to realize it was his own daughter.
Then, recognition set in, and his scowl deepened.
“You,” he spat, disgusted by your sight, “You think you can just walk back in here and tell me what to do?”
You couldn’t back down, not now. Not ever again.
“Leave him alone,” you said, your voice trembling, “He’s a child!”
Your father took a menacing step toward you, the bottle still clutched in his hand. “You’ve got some nerve, coming back here and talking to me like that. Looking exactly like her!”
Every instinct screamed at you to run, but you stood there. “I’m not afraid of you Luke,” you lied through your teeth.
His eyes flared with rage, and he raised the bottle, ready to hit you. You tensed up, waiting for the blow.
“Dad, please!” JJ’s voice broke through the tension, “Don’t hurt her.”
JJ’s plea just hung there, like this thin, fragile thread barely holding things together. For a second, your dad froze, his hand twitching, eyes darting between you and your brother.
And then, with this pissed-off roar, he chucked the bottle at the wall. It exploded into a million pieces, glass flying everywhere. The sound echoed through the house, loud and final, like it was the last brutal note in this nightmare that felt way too real.
“You’re a coward, you know that? Hitting your own children. You’re trash.” you spat out, the words flying from your mouth before you could stop them.
His face twisted, “What did you say to me?” He lunged at you, his hands going straight for your throat.
Panic hit hard as his grip tightened around your throat, stealing your breath. You clawed at his hands, desperate to break free, but he was way too strong, too determined.
Dark spots started creeping into your vision. You gasped, fighting for air, but he only squeezed harder. The room blurred and started spinning, and just when you thought you were about to pass out, his face began to change, shifting right in front of you. You blinked, trying to clear your head, and when you opened your eyes again, it wasn’t your dad choking you anymore.
It was Rafe.
Rafe's face, with a sickening grin, loomed over you. His eyes, filled with a cold, calculating malice, bore into yours. “You thought I’d be any different?” he sneered. “You signed your death sentence, pogue.”
The fear was paralyzing, like ice-cold dread flooding through your veins.Your heart hammered against your chest, but you couldn’t scream, couldn’t shout for help. His grip was solid, unbreakable, like he had no intention of letting go.
You struggled with everything you had, but it was like fighting through quicksand. Every move felt slow, heavy, like you were trapped in molasses.
As the edges of your vision began to fade, a new sound cut through the suffocating haze – JJ’s voice, calling your name. “Sis! Please, wake up! Wake up!”
With a final, desperate burst of energy, you tore yourself away from Rafe, his grip suddenly gone. You were falling, tumbling through darkness, and then–
You jolted awake, gasping for breath, your body drenched in sweat. The familiar ceiling of the motel room came into focus. The terror of the nightmare clung to you, and it made it hard to breathe.
Your hands went to your throat, feeling for bruises that weren’t there. It was just a dream, you told yourself, trying to calm your racing heart. Just a nightmare.
As your breath began to steady, you turned your head, feeling the sheets rustle against your skin.
The dim light of the room cast long shadows, and your heart sank when you saw Rafe lying next to you, his chest rising and falling in a deep, peaceful slumber. He was naked, his body partially covered by the sheets, a reminder of what you’d done hours ago.
A wave of nausea hit you, your stomach twisting with disgust — at him, at yourself. The nightmare still clung to you, the image of his hands around your throat fresh and terrifying, making it hard to process how he could sleep so soundly. You slipped out of bed as quietly as you could, not wanting to wake him, and hurriedly grabbed your clothes, dressing in silence.
Standing in the cramped bathroom, you splashed cold water on your face, hoping it would wash away the nightmare. The coolness gave you a quick moment of clarity, but the dread still clung to you, heavy and unshakable. You stared at yourself in the mirror — pale, tired, and haunted.
You took a deep breath, trying to calm down. You needed to leave, clear your head, figure out what the hell to do next. Quietly, you slipped out of the bathroom, grabbed your keys from the nightstand, and took one last glance at Rafe. He was still asleep, completely clueless about the fear swirling inside you.
The motel hallway was dark and dead silent, except for the low hum of the vending machine down the hall. You made your way to the exit, and the cool night air hit your skin like a slap of reality. It was like stepping out of one world and into another — the difference so harsh, it almost felt unreal.
You walked a few more steps, but suddenly everything started spinning. Your vision blurred, and you felt lightheaded, your legs giving out as you slumped against the wall, struggling to breathe.
The panic attack hit you full force, your chest tightening, and your mind racing. You couldn't let Rafe see you like this. You couldn't let anyone see you like this. You sank to the floor, hugging your knees to your chest, trying to focus on something, anything, to calm yourself down. You started counting your breaths, focusing on each inhale and exhale, trying to slow your racing heart. You thought of JJ, of how much he needed you to be strong.
You couldn't fall apart now.
You kept counting, kept breathing, the cool air helping to clear your head. Slowly, the tightness in your chest began to ease. The world started to come back into focus, the shadows in the hallway retreating.
You wiped away the tears that had slipped down your cheeks and stood up, feeling a little more in control.
Sleeping around—no, not just sleeping, practically baring your soul to one of the people that had destroyed your life? That had taunted and beaten your brother? Your friends? That killed a cop and got away with it? The thoughts circled in your mind. You were a dirty traitor.
The cold didn't couldn’t wash away the shame eating you alive. How did it come to this? How did you go from hating Rafe to being tangled up with him like this? 
You thought of JJ, of your friends, the people who had been there for you through everything. They’d never understand.
Hell, you didn’t even understand it yourself. You stopped and leaned against a lamppost, closing your eyes and taking a deep breath. You had to sort through this mess, had to figure out what was real and what was just the lingering effects of captivity and longing. Maybe you were holding on to the only person who managed to pull you out of Ward’s grasp, fooling yourself into finding some good in someone who had caused so much pain. 
An hour later, you made your way back to the motel, the guilt and self-doubt threatening to consume you entirely. You couldn't ignore the feeling that you'd betrayed everything you stood for by letting Rafe into your life, even if it was just for a moment of weakness.
As you got closer to the entrance, you spotted him at the front desk. He looked a mess — worried, disheveled, like he’d just woken up and thrown on some shorts in a rush. His face was tight with tension as he talked to the front desk guy, hands moving wildly, gesturing around like he was freaking out. 
Your pulse pounded as you walked in, not sure of what to say, what to do, how to approach him. The nightmare was still fresh.
Rafe's voice cut through the air, his tone urgent, "How the fuck did you not see her leave? Did someone take her?”
The front desk guy shook his head, his expression apologetic.
"Sir, I haven't seen anyone come through here."
With a deep breath, you stepped forward, revealing yourself, "I'm here," you said quietly, voice rough from not speaking since you woke up.
Rafe's head snapped up, his blue eyes widening in relief as he caught sight of you. "Thank God," he breathed, his shoulders visibly relaxing, “Fucking hell, Maybank.”
His arms were around you in an instant, his warmth enveloping you. You should feel repulsed.
His hands rested gently on your back; fingers splayed wide. For a moment, you allowed yourself to lean into his embrace for the last time, the tension in your shoulders easing ever so slightly. And then, you pushed him away, your movements sharp. His hands fell away from you. The hurt in his eyes cut through you like a punch, but you couldn’t bring yourself to think much of it. It was you or him.
You took a step back, putting some distance between you and Rafe, needing the space to breathe, to think, to figure out what came next.
Your gaze flickered to the floor, unable to meet his eyes, unable to face the consequences of your stupid actions, "Just needed some air," you muttered, “Sorry for not leaving a note.”
Rafe's expression shifted from relief to concern as he watched you, his brows furrowing.
"You okay?"
You still couldn’t bring yourself to meet his gaze, "I'm fine," you replied, your voice lacking conviction even to your own ears. "Just felt a little nauseous.”
His hand reached out tentatively as if he wanted to comfort you, but he hesitated, letting it fall back to his side. “I just woke up and you were gone, and I...I panicked."
You hated the fact you could pinpoint the sincerity in his voice so easily. It nearly killed you. 
“We should go back.”
"Will you... will you be okay?" he asked, his voice hesitant.
You nodded, trying to muster up a reassuring smile, but it felt hollow and insincere. "I'll be fine," you lied, the words tasted bitter on your tongue, “Just need some rest.”
“Okay. Okay, yeah, let’s go back.”
As you stepped inside the room, he watched you carefully, as if he was afraid you would’ve disappeared again at any given moment. He tried to reach out and grab your arm, but you moved too quickly, and he was left grasping air.
You offered him a weak smile, ignoring the look on his face.
"I'm sorry for leaving like that," you said, your voice tinged with genuine regret. "I’m fine.”
You didn’t think he believed you. He was watching you so closely. He took in how disheveled you looked. The mess of your hair, and barely laced-up shoes so you could get out the door faster. He was smart enough to read your bullshit, but he only took a deep breath to calm himself.
“Is this about last night?”
Your body froze instantly. What were you supposed to tell him? Lie? Tell him the truth and make him hate himself even more? Keep your pain down to hold his?
“It was a mistake.”
You went straight to the chase.
He stalked closer to you, and you took a step back reflexively, “A mistake?” he echoed between labored breaths, “A mistake?”
“Yeah," you stammered, trying to articulate your thoughts, "It's not right. We, we're just lonely."
You despised yourself for even hinting at it, but the tumultuous month spent with him had been bewildering, to say the least. You questioned whether you were truly good for each other. You couldn't be.
"I thought..." he began, his voice trailing off. The vulnerability in his voice pierced your skin, a consequence of your actions. But you needed to put yourself first.
“I’m sorry.”
Rafe's face contorted, his features tightening into a mask of disbelief. And you couldn’t blame him for whatever he was about to unleash on you. You probably deserved it.
“So, what? You're just gonna walk away?" He tried to bark, but his voice quivered from grief, “Stop looking at me?”
“I don’t know.”
“You don’t know?” He scoffed, lips twisting into a sneer, as he started to pace around the room, his movements restless and agitated. “That’s funny.”
Rafe could act cold and stoic all he wanted; you could hear the hurt in his voice and sense the sadness in the words. He sounded broken.
"You're angry,” Your mouth ran dry, your heart lurching into your throat. "I’m sorry.”
“Sorry?” he seethed, his voice a low growl that sent shivers down your spine, “Angry? You think you mean enough to me to make me angry?”
His words struck you like a physical blow, a slap to the face. You recoiled instinctively, even though you knew he didn't mean it.
"I don't know what I mean to you," you admitted quietly as you struggled to maintain your composure. "I just know that I can't keep doing this."
Rafe's laughter was bitter and mocking, "Can't keep doing this?" he repeated, his voice laced with derision. "And what, exactly, is 'this'? Fucking? You can’t even say it.”
“You’re being an asshole.”
"An asshole?" he spat, "Is that what you think of me?"
You held his gaze, refusing to back down despite the hurting coursing through your veins. "You're acting like one.”
“Maybank,” His voice was still harsh as he lowered his head to try and meet your eyes. He was close enough that you were able to smell him, "You don't know anything about me, remember? Maybe the fucking really did confuse you.”
“Stop it,” Your voice broke a little, fighting the waterworks that were threatening to run down your cheeks, “Stop making it sound like it meant nothing to you.”
His eyes shut tightly, “Why are you doing this?”
“Because it’s wrong! Rafe—don’t you see it? I can’t do this, not with you of all fucking people, okay?”
He looked down at the carpet, a look of shame falling over his features as he ran a hand over his face, “You knew who I was since the beginning.”
You felt so much frustration rising within you, "Yeah, and every time I look at you now, I see everything that's wrong with me."
“And whose fault is that? Hmm? You said you didn’t want to stop. You wanted it, you wanted me.”
You staggered back, feeling as if the ground beneath your feet was unsteady.
"I wanted it," Rafe repeated, fingers digging into his chest, "I wanted you."
You wanted to reach out to him, hug him as you had just hours ago, but you knew you couldn’t.
“We can’t.”
His eyes were slightly dewy, a somewhat defeated look to his gaze as he walked towards the door.
“Well, congrats Maybank. You won.”
The sound of the door slamming echoed through the room, the finality of it hitting you like a punch to the gut. You stood there, motionless, as the silence enveloped you. Why did it feel like this was going to crush you?
You sank to the floor, your back against the wall, and the tears came in a torrent, for the second time that morning. Sobs wracked your body, each one more painful than the last, as the reality of your situation became clear as day. You had pushed him away, and hurt him, but what other choice did you have? 
The quiet without him was almost eerie. You weren't used to being alone anymore. You couldn't deny that you had felt something for Rafe, something more than just anger and resentment.
But it was twisted, born out of shared trauma and desperation, wasn’t it? It had to be. It was the only explanation that made sense.
Wiping your tear-streaked face with trembling hands, you tried to gather yourself. You still needed to get home. In five days. How the fuck were you going to live in the same room with Rafe for five days after what went down?
You sat on the motel room floor for what felt like hours, the silence driving you up the walls. Eventually, exhaustion won out, and you crawled into bed, your mind too restless to allow for more than fitful dozing.
It was around 4 a.m. when the door to the motel room creaked open, startling you awake. You sat up, your heart pounding, straining to see in the dark. The figure that stumbled through the door was unmistakable: Rafe. His movements were unsteady, his clothes disheveled, and the sharp scent of alcohol hit you even from across the room.
“Rafe?”
He didn’t respond immediately. Instead, he leaned heavily against the doorframe, his eyes unfocused. He looked lost.
The anger that had driven him was gone, replaced by a hollow, almost haunted look. You had done that to him.
You got out of bed, approaching him cautiously, “What are you doing?”
He finally looked at you, his eyes bloodshot, “I... I couldn’t stay away,” he slurred, his words thick with the effects of too much alcohol. “I tried, but...”
You sighed, “Rafe, you’re drunk. You need to sit down.”
He let you guide him to the bed, his body heavy and uncooperative. Once he was seated, you grabbed a bottle of water from the small table and handed it to him.
“Drink this,” you instructed.
He took a sip, his hands shaking slightly. “I’m sorry,” he muttered, staring down at the floor. “For everything.”
It was the first time he ever apologized to you.
You didn’t know what to say. Part of you wanted to comfort him, to tell him it was okay, but another part of you was still reeling from earlier.
“You need to sleep this off."
He nodded but didn’t move.
Instead, he reached out, his hand brushing against yours. “I don’t want to be like him,” he confessed, “I can't."
If you allowed him to keep sputtering out his drunken thoughts you would’ve ended up crying your eyes out again, so instead you squeezed his hand, “Let’s just sleep, okay?”
He nodded again, his eyes drifting shut as the exhaustion and alcohol finally took their toll. You helped him lie down, covering him with the sheets. As you laid back down, you watched Rafe’s breathing even out, his face softening in sleep. 
That night? It never happened. It felt like everything was happening all over again.
Rafe didn’t spare you a glance from the moment he woke up, choosing to care for his hangover by himself. You and he moved around each other like ghosts, the motel room becoming a prison. You barely slept, the nightmares coming back, leaving you exhausted and on edge.
Every time you closed your eyes, you saw your father, Rafe, or the hauntings of your past, blending into a tiring cycle of fear. You knew he’d been having nightmares as well, but you pretended to be asleep every time he woke up, chest heaving. He never asked for you help.
He seemed so caught in his torment. You could see it in the way he clenched his jaw, the way his hands would flex into fists and then relax as if he was battling some inner demon. He avoided you, constantly, and when he did speak, his words were clipped and distant.
Your shared meals were silent, the clinking of cutlery the only sound breaking the oppressive quiet. Even the TV stayed off.
On the fifth night, you lay awake in the dark, listening to the rhythm of Rafe's breathing from the other bed. It was uneven, indicating he was also awake. Maybe you should've kept quiet, but his druken monologue was still very much killing you inside.
“You’re not gonna end up like him.”
Rafe's breathing hitched, and you could almost feel his eyes on you through the darkness.
"I mean it," you continued, turning slightly to face his silhouette. "You're not your father."
He didn't respond immediately, but you sensed a subtle change in his posture. Finally, he sighed, "How can you be so sure?" he murmured.
You took a deep breath, trying to find the right words. "Because I've seen you. I've seen the parts of you that fight against becoming him. The parts that want to be better. And that matters."
He let out a bitter laugh. "I'm not sure it’s enough.”
“It is.”
“It’s not, Maybank. I’ve done enough damage for a lifetime. It’s the reason why you’re sleeping on the other side of the bed instead of right next to me.”
You wanted to reach out, to reassure him that he wasn’t alone, but you knew it wasn’t that simple. 
“I’m still here,” you said softly, “I’m not leaving.”
“You already did.”
Ouch.
Before you could utter a single word, he turned his back to you.
“We’re leaving tomorrow. Sleep.”
“Rafe—”
“Goodnight.”
It took you hours to fall asleep. You lay in bed the events of the past weeks replaying in your mind. You thought of Rafe, of the hurt in his eyes, the way he had looked at you like you were the only thing keeping him tethered to reality. That didn't matter anymore to him.
The next morning, you didn’t bother much with packing, only shoving the pieces of clothing you’d collected in a backpack. It felt torturous, to be so close to Rafe yet so far away. He didn’t speak a word as he packed his things, his movements stiff and mechanical. You wanted to break the silence, but every time you opened your mouth, the words seemed to stick in your throat.
The taxi drive to the port was just as unbearable. You stared out the window, watching the landscape blur past, your mind racing with thoughts of what could have been, what should have been. 
Once you arrived, you and Rafe stepped out, the silence between you as impenetrable as ever. It was over. He took the lead, heading towards the ticket booth with his shoulders hunched, and you followed.
You were still scared shitless of those men. They were only helping you because at some point Rafe had helped them smuggle drugs into the States, and that did not leave you the least bit reassured over their intentions. 
Finding a spot on the deck, you both settled into a tense silence, the hum of the boat’s engine and the cries of seagulls filling the void between you. The beauty of the scene did little to ease the anxiety tightening in your chest.
He leaned against the railing, his gaze fixed on the horizon, his face still void of any emotion.
You watched him for a moment, torn between wanting to reach out to him and the fear that doing so would only make things worse.
Finally, unable to bear the silence any longer, you cleared your throat.
“Rafe,” you began hesitantly, “I—”
Before you could finish, he turned to you, his expression weary. “We don’t have to talk about it,” he said, his voice flat. “Not now.”
Not ever, that's what he meant.
You nodded, swallowing the lump in your throat. “Okay.”
“Just stay low, stay quiet. My dad got eyes everywhere.”
From the corner of your eye you spotted one of the men. Tall, burly, with a scar running down his cheek. He simply nodded towards the cargo boat and for a minute you’re taken back to your first day stuck with the Cameron’s, you couldn’t shake the feeling that something was about to go terribly wrong.
Rafe walked in front of you again, entering the ship, rounding his way through the halls behind the sketchy guy, only stopping when he knocked on a door, after a moment, it swung open to reveal a bald shot man, eyes way too big for his face, which flicked over you and Rafe, a predatory smile curling his lips.
“Well, well, look who decided to show up,” he drawled, his voice laced with mockery. “You’re late.”
“Had some complications,” Rafe replied curtly, his posture tense.
You didn't like it one bit.
“Complications, huh? Well, come on in”
You followed Rafe inside, heart racing. The interior of the room was pretty dark, the air thick with the smell of smoke and something you couldn’t quite identify. Nor did you want to. 
“Rafe,” the older man announced, his voice cold and commanding. “I was starting to think you’d forgotten about our arrangement.”
“Never,” Rafe replied, his tone clipped. “I brought the money.”
He handed over a thick envelope, and the man behind the desk took it, flipping through the bills with a practiced eye. After a moment, he nodded, satisfied.
“Good,” he said, leaning back in his chair. “Now, let’s discuss the other part of our deal.”
Rafe stiffened. “I told you, I’m out. I’m not running anything for you anymore.”
The man’s eyes narrowed, his smile turning dangerous. “I don’t think you understand. You don’t get to just walk away.”
You felt a chill run down your spine. This wasn't the plan. Right? The man behind the desk stood up, his gaze shifting to you.
“And who’s this?” he asked, his tone menacing.
“No one,” Rafe said quickly. “She has nothing to do with this.”
The man chuckled, a low, sinister sound. “Oh, I think she has everything to do with this.”
He took a step towards you, and instinctively, you backed away, Rafe moving to place himself between you and the older man, “Leave her out of this.”
“You see, your daddy dearest called in last night. Told me about a loose piece he had to get rid off…a pretty one. Guess this is her?”
"That's none of your business," Rafe growled, his voice filled with a warning, body still shielding yours.
The older man laughed, the sound grating against your nerves.
"Oh, but it is my business, Rafe. You see, your daddy and I, we go way back. And when he asks for a favor, I don't say no."
You knew this had to be a trap.
"Rafe, we need to go," you whispered urgently, tugging on his arm.
He didn't move, his eyes locked on the man before him. "We're leaving."
The man smirked, his gaze shifting between you and Rafe. "You think you can just walk out of here? You're in deep, Cameron. And now, so is she."
Rafe's jaw tightened, his hands clenching into fists. "We're not doing this.”
The older man took a step closer, his eyes gleaming with malicious intent. 
"You have two choices, Rafe. You either do as I say, or she pays the price like Ward asked.”
Your heart pounded in your chest, fear coursing through your veins. You couldn't let Rafe get pulled back into this world, but you couldn't think about what might happen to both of you if you stayed.
"Rafe, please," you pleaded, your voice trembling at that point.
Rafe’s gaze flicked to you as if he was memorizing your features, from your eyes down to your lips. Oh hell no. You could see the gears turning inside his brain and it made you sick to your stomach when he took a deep breath, his eyes hardening with resolve.
“Run.”
Before you could protest, Rafe launched himself at the older man, tackling him to the ground. The suddenness of the movement caught everyone off guard, but you knew you had to act quickly.
Heart pounding, you turned and bolted out of the room, dropping your backpack in the process, your footsteps echoing down the dimly lit corridor.
Behind you, you could hear the sounds of struggle—grunts, crashes, and the thud of bodies hitting the floor. You didn’t dare look back, knowing that every second counted. Rafe had told you to run.
The ship's layout was confusing, with identical-looking hallways and doors leading to who-knew-where. You sprinted through the maze of metal and dim lights, your breath coming in ragged gasps. The distant sound of shouting and commotion indicated that the fight wasn't over. You turned a corner and collided with one of the burly men from earlier.
He grabbed your arm like you were some kind of animal, “Where do you think you’re going?” he snarled.
You stomped on his foot and jabbed your elbow into his ribs, wrenching your arm free as he grunted in pain. Without wasting a second, you continued running, your legs burning.
You burst onto the deck, the cold, salty air hitting you like a slap. The early morning light was just beginning to brighten the horizon, casting long shadows across the deck. You looked around frantically, searching for any means of escape. Your eyes landed on a lifeboat secured to the side of the ship. Without hesitation, you made your way towards it, fumbling with the ropes that held it in place. Your fingers were shaking, but you managed to free the boat. As you were about to lower it into the water, a rough hand grabbed your shoulder and spun you around. It was the man with the scar, his face twisted in anger.
“Going somewhere?” he sneered.
You tried to fight him off, but he was too strong.
Just when you thought all hope was lost, a loud bang echoed across the deck. The man with the scar froze, his grip loosening. You took the opportunity to break free, scrambling away from him.
Rafe stood at the entrance to the deck, a gun in his hand and determination in his eyes. The man with the scar raised his hands slowly, backing away.
“You okay?” Rafe asked.
“I think so.”
“Come here.”
Without thinking, you ran to him, your heart pounding with relief. He was okay. You were okay.
His arms wrapped around your lower back tightly, and gently pulled you back, his eyes searching your face to make sure you were okay, but before you could assure him you were fine, he kissed you.
It felt so…real, it nearly brought you to your knees. As cheesy as it sounded, it felt like time stood still for you, the rest of the world ceasing to exist. 
Until reality broke you again.
Rafe's body tensed suddenly. You heard a muffled sound, like a distant pop, but it took a moment for your mind to register what had happened. His grip on you loosened, and he staggered, his breath hitching in pain. No, no, no, no.
"Rafe?” You caught him as he fell to his knees, eyes darting around, searching for the source of the shot. Your eyes nearly popped out of your head as you watched a showdown between the so-called human traffickers and the fucking police. This had to be a fucking nightmare, no way, were you getting caught in a crossfire. 
Rafe clutched his side, blood seeping through his fingers, staining his white shirt. His face was scarily pale, and he struggled to stay upright.
"You need to...get out of here," he managed to say, his voice strained, “Right now.”
“I’m not leaving you, you fuckin—Shit, Rafe. Fuck!” You looked around frantically, your heart pounding in your chest. "Can you walk?" you asked, trying to keep the panic from your voice, you didn't want to scare him.
“Does it look like I can walk, pretty Maybank?”
A sob broke through you, “Don’t try to be fucking funny, you got shot!”
“Baby, you—“ he coughed, blood seeping through his teeth, "You gotta go home.”
"Stop talking!" you repeated, your voice trembling with desperation.
You looked around again, trying to find a way out, a way to save him, anything. But the chaos around you was too much. The police and the traffickers were in a fierce shootout, bullets whizzing through the air, ricocheting off metal, and splintering wood. There was nowhere to run.
Rafe's hand tightened weakly around yours.
"Listen to me," he said, his voice just a whisper. "You have to...Go gome."
Tears streamed down your face as you shook your head. "I can't leave you here."
You knew you had to move, had to find help, but leaving him there felt like tearing your heart out. As you turned to peek around one final time, you heard a shout from behind you.
"Freeze!" a police officer yelled, his gun trained on you.
You stopped, your hands raised, your mind racing. "Please, help him," you begged, pointing to Rafe. "He's been shot."
The officer's eyes flicked to Rafe, then back to you. "We need to secure the area first," he said, his tone firm but not unkind.
"Please," you repeated, your voice breaking. "He's dying."
The officer hesitated, then spoke into his radio. "Officer down, need medical assistance immediately."
Another officer approached, his gun drawn, and you saw his gaze soften as he took in Rafe's condition. "We'll get him help," he assured you, "but we need to get you out of here safely."
“I’m not leaving without him,” You made the mistake to glance back one last time, your heart breaking as you saw Rafe's eyes close, his body slumping against the ground, “No, no, no! Keep your eyes open, I swear to god—” Your hands trembled as you tried to staunch the flow of blood with your already stained clothing, "Stay with me," you pleaded, your voice cracking. 
His eyes fluttered open briefly, a weak smile touching his lips, "Go."
Before you could tell him off, you felt hands grip your shoulders, pulling you back. "We need to get you to safety," one of the officers said firmly, trying to drag you away from Rafe.
"No! Let me go! I can't leave him!" you screamed, fighting against their hold.
"Ma'am, we need to get you out of the line of fire," the officer insisted, his grip tightening as he pulled you to your feet.
Through your tears, you saw more officers surrounding Rafe, their voices urgent as they called for medical assistance. You watched helplessly as they began to administer first aid, their movements efficient and hurried.
As the officers dragged you away against your will, your eyes never left Rafe. "Please, don't let him die," you sobbed, your voice breaking with despair.
"We're doing everything we can," one of the officers reassured you, guiding you towards the edge of the deck where a police boat was waiting.
You stumbled, your legs weak with fear and exhaustion, but the officers held you steady. As you were helped onto the police boat, you turned back one last time, your heart breaking at the sight of Rafe lying on the deck, surrounded by officers and paramedics. You clutched the railing, your knuckles white, as the boat pulled away from the ship, the distance between you and Rafe growing with each passing second.
The journey back to shore was nothing but a blur of sirens, flashing lights, and the distant sound of helicopter blades cutting through the air. The police officers tried to reassure you, but you wouldn't rest until you saw him again. Alive.
When the boat finally docked, paramedics rushed forward, checking you for injuries, while police officers asked you questions about what had happened. You answered them mechanically, your mind still focused on Rafe, praying that he would survive. Hours seemed to pass in a haze of questions, medical checks, and statements. You told them everything. Finally, you were allowed to sit down and a police officer approached you.
"Rafe Cameron is being taken to the hospital," he said gently. "He's in critical condition, but the paramedics are doing everything they can."
You nodded numbly, "Can I see him?"
“’No visitors will be allowed, kid. We checked your backgrounds. If he survives, he’ll be taken into custody, his father is Ward Cameron, the feds are going to need him.”
You nearly threw up at how easily he said, “if he survives”. There couldn’t be no fucking ifs, he wasn’t dying. Not like this. Not after everything. 
Your knees buckled, and you had to sit down again. The officer helped you to a bench, his face sympathetic, “I understand this is hard, but we need to follow protocol. He’s a key witness and suspect in multiple ongoing investigations.”
You nodded. The world felt distant, and surreal. “Can I at least know which hospital?”
The officer hesitated for a moment, then relented. “St. Michael’s. But you won’t be allowed to call until we clear things with the authorities.”
“Call? I want to visit.”
He sighed, taking a seat next to you, “Kid. I’m really sorry, but you won’t be here. You’re a kidnapping victim and there’s a direct order to take you back home, you’ve been reported missing for over a month now.”
Your mind reeled, struggling to process the officer's words.
Missing? For over a month? It felt like a lifetime and no time at all had passed since you'd been caught up in this nightmare.
"I can't leave him. Not like this."
The officer's expression softened. "I understand, but this is out of my hands. We need to get you back to your family. They'll be worried sick."
What family?
You wanted to shout in his face. JJ was still missing for all you knew and Luke hadn't stepped foot home in months. You felt so helpless.
“I can't just leave him."
"We're going to get you home safely. You'll be able to follow up on Rafe's condition, but right now, you need to come with us."
The officer stood up, motioning for you to follow. Reluctantly, you got to your feet, without another option, every step feeling like a betrayal to Rafe.
As you were led out of the station and into a waiting car, you could only imagine him lying in a hospital bed, fighting for his life, by himself. You couldn't bear the thought of him waking up alone, without knowing that you were there for him.
If he ever woke up.
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ddejavvu · 1 year ago
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hi mei! i absolutely love your stories! you’re a really great writer 🥰
i was wondering if u’d be interested in doing a hotch drabble about him with a s/o who seems really intimidating but is actually really soft and sweet?
like maybe it’s her appearance that makes the team intimidated by her—edgy clothing and dark makeup and stuff—when she shows up to hang out with hotch on his lunch breaks. and she’s like ‘i feel like your team doesn’t like me :(‘ and he’s like ‘honey, they’re borderline scared of you’ but it’s fluffy.
if you don’t wanna that’s totally okay! i did a bad job explaining but i’m sure you’d do an amazing job :)
love ya!! hope ur having a good day
Aaron loves when you visit him at the office for lunch, but you don't look like you're in high spirits yourself. When you sit down its with a huff and a hiss of the chair accommodating your weight, only adding to your dramatics.
"This might be my career in profiling speaking," Aaron begins, his voice soft in case something is terribly wrong, "But something tells me you're not having a good day, sweetheart."
"You're good," You tease him, and he wishes you could laugh about it together, "Aaron, I think Doctor Reid is afraid of me."
Aaron has to bite his tongue not to laugh. Doctor Reid is afraid of buffets, he thinks, but it's not an abundance of germs that unnerves Spencer about you, it's- well, it's everything he knows about you.
"Honey," Aaron calls upon that sweet tone again, "He doesn't know you very well."
"You didn't deny it!" You groan, falling back into your chair and abandoning your soup on his desk, "I knew it. What did I do?"
Aaron looks into your eyes, black-lined and sharp. He watches you chew on your cheek, your black-stained lips moved by the nervous quirk. Below your tense jaw is a chain that rests against your neck, not a full choker but not loose, either. It nearly disappears into the hem of your jacket, black leather that falls over a rather graphic old band tee.
"It's not what you've done," Aaron explains tentatively, "It's probably- well, how you look."
Your nose scrunches, and Aaron marvels the fact that you seem to have forgotten your appearance, "How do I look?"
"Like a doberman pinscher in human form," Aaron bites off a corner of his sandwich, chewing it in lieu of pressing the matter further.
"I like dobermans." You supply weakly, "Why is he afraid of me?"
"You're just not what he's used to," Aaron sighs, swallowing his mouthful and leaning across the desk, hand outstretched, "He probably thinks you could dismember him with those nails."
You place your palm in Aaron's own, and he flips your hand around to showcase the rather impressively sharp acrylics you're sporting.
"And your boots are heavier than he is, I guarantee it," Aaron nods down at your thick-soled black boots, ones that give away your entrance from a mile away by the sound of their rubber hitting the ground.
"He's just..." Aaron searches for the right word, trying not to disparage you or Reid, "Skittish. You should talk to him, though, honey. He likes science, and literature, and Star Trek. Pick something from one of those categories, and I promise he'll never stop talking to you for the rest of your life."
You're mostly satisfied, but you let your hand rest in Aaron's for a moment longer, and he'd be a fool to drop it.
"Am I scary, Aaron?" You ask earnestly, and his smile is warm as he brings your hand to his mouth to kiss at your knuckles.
"Not to me. And not to anyone who knows you," He promises, "But... it is nice to not have to worry about carrying a gun when we go out together."
"Aaron!" You laugh, "I'm not a weapon!"
"You could be!" Aaron insists, tugging your hand over to his lunch and dragging your fingernail across his sandwich, "Here, honey, cut it for me, would you? They forgot to give us knives."
"Stop!" You insist, but your laughter gives you away as you turn back to your soup with burning cheeks, "Just you wait, Aaron. As soon as Penelope stops running whenever I enter a room, we're gonna talk shit about you for this."
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idyllic-ghost · 2 months ago
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Title: INK'D Hearts: Tattoos and Tangled Sheets Pairing: tattoo artist!hongjoong x afab!reader Genre: tattoo shop au, strangers to lovers, romantic, fluff, angst, smut, opposites attract Wordcount: 26.7k Rating: 18+
Synopsis: All you wanted was to have your first tattoo done and over with. How were you supposed to know that your tattoo artist would be this cute? For the sake of your sanity, you try to get over how good he looks—but fate seems to have other plans. Although you keep meeting, and even if you seem to fit well together, there's something, unbeknownst to you, holding Hongjoong back.
Warnings: reader is described as feminine but uses gn pronouns, corruption kink mentioned, dom/sub dynamics, kinky stuff happens, mentions of feeling insecure, lack of experience on reader's part, the rest of atz make an appearance briefly and are being a little annoying, underground band!atz, hongjoong and reader are opposites (hongjoong being more edgy, while reader is a little softer), mentions of smoking
Disclaimer: The scenarios and depictions in my works are fictional and do not represent real-life situations. They do not aim to reflect the complexities of any culture, city, or individual. All characters are entirely fictional, regardless of names or descriptions.
MDNI: Adults only. Minors are not allowed. Any minors found will be blocked.
A/N: this fic was created before i decided to leave this blog permanently, and put on queue to be posted now. this blog is still not active. read here to find out why
Thank you @wongyuseokie for making this banner for me!
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The music was loud in your headphones, but you couldn’t make out any of the words the band was singing - it was mostly there to distract you from your thoughts and the bustling city around you. For some reason, everyone and their mother decided to go out today. Walking towards the tattoo shop, you were forced to sneak around groups of people and snake through crowds. Ink’d was right around the corner of the popular market, a place which, unbeknownst to you, was holding a special event today. However, the crowds of people thinned out as you turned the corner down an alley. There were cafés, clothing stores, and hair salons in every other building. On top of each were fancy apartments, probably owned by the same people for the past forty years. However, your eyes didn’t wander much; as soon as you saw the sign for the shop, you didn’t need to look elsewhere. 
Looking down at your phone, you saw you were just on time for your appointment. Not even that could bring down your nerves. This was your very first tattoo appointment, and you had no idea what to expect. Some of your friends had tattoos, and their stories ranged from pretty okay to frightening. With their help, you found Ink’d — your friend, Seonghwa, had recommended you to go to one of the tattoo artists there. After looking through his work on Instagram, you decided to reach out. He was accommodating to your needs even over email and asked you to come in today to see what he could do for you. Despite all of the help and how kind the artist seemed to be, you were still nervous. 
As you stood in front of the tattoo shop, you debated on not going in. You could send an email to the artist and tell him that you were sorry, but you just couldn’t go through with this. It would be rude on such short notice, but you were practically shitting yourself in fear at the thought of having needles poke your skin with ink. The reflective surface of the doors mocked you, but you still couldn’t go in. The shop wasn’t big, but it didn’t need to be to get your attention. The walls were painted dark blue, and the sign that hung above the door was in the shape of a splotch of ink. In the middle of the sign, in big bold letters, it said INK’D. Great. Even the sign intimidated you. 
You looked down at yourself, at your baggy pants and oversized sweater - anything to make yourself as comfortable as possible. Was it good enough for this place? You wouldn’t know until you walked inside. With a deep breath, you pushed the door open… but it didn’t open. On the handle of the door, it very clearly said ‘PULL’, something you had managed to miss. Pushing down the embarrassment for the sake of the tattoo you were about to get, you pulled the door open and walked inside. 
The tile floors looked old like they had been there since the building was made. The edges of the pretty design were chipped, and a few places were missing entire tiles. It was a part of its charm. The walls, on the other hand, were newly painted white - but you couldn’t tell seeing as they were filled with frames. From floor to ceiling, there were paintings and pictures of all kinds covering the shop’s walls—posters of various artists, photos of artwork and clients, and photographs from abstract to realistic. Your attention was suddenly drawn to the reception. A man with cherry red hair and a playful smile stood behind the desk.
“Hi, can I help you?” he asked.
The first thing you noticed about him was how his eyes pierced your soul. His gaze was kind yet powerful, to the point where you almost wanted to look away. This look was only amplified by the thin layer of liner that lined his eyes. His bright red hair looked like it was slightly grown out, but it wasn’t long enough to cover the many piercings along his earlobes. Silver jewelry dangled from his ears, they matched the silver chain around his neck and the rings that adorned his fingers. The tight, black t-shirt he was wearing revealed his toned arms covered with ink. Delicate designs and images adorned his skin, and you could only imagine how many tattoos he had. A few peeked out from under his collar, but you couldn’t make out what the black ink on his neck was supposed to be. You could study this man for hours, but you had to answer him at some point.
“Uh… yes! Hi.” You approached the desk as you fiddled with the edge of your sleeves. “I’m here for an appointment… it should be under Y/L/N Y/N, I’m here to meet Kim Hongjoong.”
“Oh, Y/N, hey…” He looked at his computer, the smile still playing on his lips. “Nice to finally meet you, I’m Hongjoong.”
He looked up at you again, his eyes locking onto yours with that same piercing gaze that seemed to see right through you. A shiver ran down your spine, and you felt yourself growing weak in the knees. This was the man who was going to tattoo you? The thought of the needle was already enough to make your heart race, but now, you had to contend with the added pressure of trying not to make an absolute fool of yourself in front of the impossibly attractive tattoo artist.
His sharp jawline and the confident way he carried himself only added to your nervousness. You watched as he adjusted his glasses, a small, almost imperceptible smirk playing on his lips as if he could sense your inner turmoil. He turned back to his computer, fingers flying over the keyboard – his nails were painted black, the polish chipped around the edges and almost completely scratched off on some nails. The stark contrast against his fair skin was striking.
As he continued typing, you couldn't help but steal glances at his hands, wondering about the stories behind each stroke of polish. What kind of person was he outside of this tattoo parlor? Your mind raced with questions, each one adding another layer to the mystery that was this man.
When he finally turned back to you, a professional yet warm smile on his face, you took a deep breath, trying to steady your racing heart. “First tattoo, right?” he asked, his voice smooth and reassuring.
“Yeah, it is.” You nodded and looked around the shop while Hongjoong kept typing. “I don’t think I’ve ever been in a tattoo shop before.”
“Is that why it took you so long to get in?” he said in a teasing tone.
You looked back at him, only to see him grinning. His smile was infectious, and you found yourself relaxing slightly despite your nerves. In his hands was a clipboard with a paper on it, which he handed to you along with a pen. Your eyes widened as you realized that the glossy, dark walls were actually windows, through which he could very much see outside. The realization added a new layer of vulnerability to your already jittery state.
“Sorry, I’m just teasing,” he quickly added, his voice softening. “I get that you’re nervous. So, why don’t you fill this form out, and then we’ll talk over what we’re going to do today? Does that sound good, love?”
Your breath hitched in your throat at the unexpected pet name, and instead of a coherent answer, an awkward cough escaped your lips. Your cheeks flushed with embarrassment as you clutched the clipboard to your chest, nodding quickly before making your way over to one of the couches in the waiting area. The soft leather cushions welcomed you, and you sank into them, wishing you could stay there instead of going through with your appointment.
With a sigh, you placed your bag beside you and began to fill out the form. Your hands trembled slightly as you scribbled your name, date of birth, and other required details. The background noise of the shop – the hum of the tattoo machines, the low murmur of other conversations, and the soft rock music playing in the background – started to blend into a soothing symphony, helping to calm your racing heart.
You glanced up occasionally, watching Hongjoong as he moved confidently around his workspace. There was something mesmerizing about the way he carried himself, a blend of focus and ease that only came from years of experience. It was reassuring to know you were in capable hands.
As you continued to fill out the form, your mind wandered to the design you had chosen. It was something personal, a symbol of strength and transformation that you had wanted for years. Now, on the brink of making it a permanent part of you, the mixture of excitement and apprehension was almost overwhelming.
When you finally finished the form, you took a deep breath and stood up, clutching the clipboard as if it were a lifeline. You made your way back to Hongjoong, who looked up from his computer with a reassuring smile.
“All done?” he asked, his tone gentle.
You nodded, handing him the clipboard. “Yeah, all done.”
“Great,” he said, scanning the form quickly before setting it aside, and he looked through them before giving you a pleased smile. Maybe it was your nerves, but your heart jolted at his smile. You wanted – no, needed – to please him like that again. “Let’s go to my studio and get started, yeah?”
His studio had the same intricate, patterned tiles on the floor as the waiting room, their glossy finish reflecting the ambient light and adding a touch of elegance to the space. However, the walls were painted a deep, matte black, providing a stark contrast that made the room feel both intimate and edgy. The black surface served as a canvas for vibrant spray paint art – swirls of neon colors and abstract designs that burst forth with energy and creativity. Interspersed among the graffiti were various posters, some showcasing famous tattoos, and others featuring artwork from local artists, lending a personal touch to the décor.
In one corner of the room, a small, well-organized desk sat neatly against the wall. On its surface were a sleek laptop, a modern desk lamp casting a warm glow, and a few neatly stacked papers. The desk exuded a sense of efficiency and order. Beside it stood a modest chair, perfectly pushed in and out of the way, maintaining the room's open and uncluttered feel.
The focal point of the studio was undoubtedly the tattoo chair, positioned prominently in the middle of the room. It was upholstered in smooth black leather, looking both comfortable and professional. Adjacent to it was a matching black leather stool, presumably for Hongjoong to use while working. Next to the chair stood a metal cart, meticulously organized with an array of tattooing materials – inks in a spectrum of colors, sterilized needles, and various other tools of the trade, all within easy reach.
The room was imbued with a sophisticated aroma that hinted at luxury and care. The air was filled with the delicate scents of bergamot, blackcurrant, and jasmine, creating an atmosphere that was both calming and intoxicating. You couldn't quite tell if the source of this enchanting fragrance was the candle burning softly on his desk or Hongjoong's own cologne. Either way, the scent wrapped around your senses, creating a foggy, almost dreamlike state as you took it all in.
Hongjoong moved closer to you, his presence both reassuring and electrifying. The scent intensified as he approached, enveloping you completely and making everything else fade into the background. His hand hovered right behind your upper back, guiding you towards the tattoo chair.
“Make yourself comfortable,” he said. “You can sit down right here and we’ll discuss what I can do for you today.”
He took his laptop from his desk and sat down on the stool next to you. You jumped onto the tattoo chair, letting your feet dangle off the edge. Looking down at the floor, you saw Hongjoong’s polished leather boots next to your beat-up sneakers. Everything about him was somehow messy and pristine at the same time — delicate and coarse.
“You got my design idea, right?” you asked to break the silence.
“I did. It’s pretty.” He looked up at you with a friendly smile. “I took the liberty of drawing something up with it as inspiration, do you want to have a look?”
Before you could respond, Hongjoong turned the laptop so that you could see the design. It was a lotus flower, just like your reference picture, and connected to it were elegant, curved lines that stretched out a few inches away from it. It looked like small water droplets were attached to the flower and lines, some of them falling freely.
“What do we think?” he asked.
“It’s beautiful,” you murmured and leaned in closer. “Your art style is so graceful.”
“You’d be the first to say that.” He let out a laugh and pulled the laptop away from you. “This is a little further away from what I usually do. But this suits your tastes, right?”
“Definitely.” You nodded and watched him gather a few things.
“And it’s going to sit right by your hip?”
“Yeah.”
“Then I’ll go ahead and print out a stencil for you. How big do you want it to be?” He put his hands up and measured in the air. “About this big?”
“That looks good,” you answered.
“I’ll get that sorted for you then, love.”
Hongjoong left you alone in his studio, and your muscles finally relaxed. When Seonghwa recommended him, he said nothing about how good-looking and charming he was. Now you wish that you had tried a little harder to get one of your friends to go with you. Being all alone with him only made you more nervous. When Hongjoong came back, he walked over to his desk and picked up his glasses. The thin black frames sat on the tip of his nose as he studied the stencil in his hands. With a proud nod, he showed you the stencil to get your approval.
“Good size?” he asked as he walked up to you.
“It’s good.” You nodded, your fingers playing with the hem of your sweater. 
He looked at you closely, inspecting your nervous fidgeting and the way your eyes flickered around the room. Sitting back on the stool, Hongjoong got right up next to you. The intoxicating scent made you dizzy again, and you put your hand beside you to stabilize yourself.
“Are you nervous?” he asked. “You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”
“Just a little,” you admitted with an awkward chuckle.
“That’s okay.” He motioned for you to lay down on the chair and you did as he said. “I’ll put the stencil on you, then you can take a look at it and tell me what you think. Is it okay if I pull up your sweater?”
You nodded and helped him move away your clothes. When the sweater was out of the way, you moved your hands to your pants. They already sat low on your hips, but you loosened the strings and pulled them down enough to expose the entirety of your hip bone. Hongjoong was talking as he put on the stencil, walking you through the steps as he was doing it. His soft voice calmed your nerves and seeing as you didn’t have to look directly at him, your heart started calming down as well. When he peels away the stencil, revealing blue lines on your skin, you look down at his hands.
“There you go, love.” He pushed up his glasses and looked up at you with a smile. “There’s a mirror over there, why don’t you go look at it and tell me if you like the placement.”
You hummed and carefully got off the chair. While you walked over to the mirror, Hongjoong prepared his station. The blue ink looked good against your skin, mostly because of the design. This is why you have been wanting to get a tattoo for so long. You smiled to yourself, looking past the nerves and bubbly feeling in your stomach that you got from looking at Hongjoong.
“It’s perfect,” you chimed.
You walked back over to the leather chair, which was now covered in a protective sheet. A bright smile was painted on your lips as you sat down in front of him again. Something sparkled in Hongjoong’s eyes just then, and you couldn't figure out what it was but you knew that you wanted to see it again. 
“So… uhm…” He scratched the back of his neck and pretended to look for something. “Is the placement and size all good? You’re allowed to change anything, you know? I won’t be upset.”
His reassurance only made you more comfortable. The nerves that had made you want to puke just a few minutes ago, were now suddenly gone. Hongjoong looked back at you with his eyebrows slightly raised, still looking for an answer from you.
“Oh, yes. It’s good. I like it,” you said. “Thank you.”
“It’s no big deal.” He got closer to you, the wheels on his stool easily rolling over the ground. “You can lay back down and I’ll start as soon as you’re comfortable.”
He had black rubber gloves on now, a stark contrast to the delicate silver rings that lay on his desk. The rings, intricate in design, caught the light and glinted, a reminder of the careful preparation Hongjoong had undertaken for your session. His cart was meticulously organized, filled with the colors you had requested. Each ink bottle stood ready, a spectrum of possibilities waiting to be brought to life on your skin.
The tattoo gun in his hand looked like the tip of a small drill, its precision and purpose unmistakable. A medical-blue plastic wrap covered the cord attached to it, ensuring everything remained sterile. Hongjoong began to explain the process, his voice calm and reassuring, a professional easing the nerves of a first-time client. He gently pushed away your clothes, ensuring they weren’t in the way, his movements careful and considerate. The touch of his gloved hands was cool against your skin, a stark contrast to the warmth you felt spreading from your core.
You couldn’t help but focus on the way he was inspecting the skin where your stencil was placed. His eyes narrowed slightly as he assessed the area, ensuring everything was perfect before beginning. Your breath caught in your throat, the moment feeling surreal and significant. His red hair, vibrant and striking, hung slightly over his eyes despite his efforts to push it back. The black roots of his natural hair had started growing out, a subtle detail that you could only notice from this close proximity.
He looked up at you then, and your eyes met. Behind his glasses, his gaze was intense and focused, yet there was a softness there that put you at ease. His eyes, framed by the sharp lines of his glasses, seemed to hold a depth of understanding, a silent communication that everything was going to be alright.
“Does that sound good, love?” he asked.
“Sorry?” You had forgotten to listen to what he was saying.
“I’m going to give you a warning before I put the needle on your skin,” he repeated. “Does that sound good?”
“Yeah, it does…”
You leaned your head back against the chair and shut your eyes tightly. Hongjoong warned you that he was going to start, and you clutched the bunched-up fabric of your sweater tighter. It wasn’t comfortable, of course, but it didn’t hurt as much as you expected. 
Hongjoong worked fast, and when he was halfway done he asked if you needed to take a break. You agreed as you were starting to feel a little lightheaded.
“Could you hand me my bag?” you asked shyly.
Your bag was hanging by the door, and Hongjoong quickly walked over to it and picked it up for you. While you pulled out your water bottle and an energy bar, Hongjoong massaged his wrist. He looked over at you with the same playful smile he had worn when you first walked in. 
“Do you have friends with tattoos or something?” he asked.
“Yeah, why?”
“No, it’s just… you seem to know what to do despite this being your first tattoo.” He sat back on his stool, right by your side. “You know Seonghwa, right?”
“He’s the one who recommended that I should go to you.” You nodded. “To be honest, I didn’t even know he had tattoos.”
“Well, I think he only recommended me because we’re friends,” he said and your eyes widened. “He has a tattoo on his back, but I didn’t do that one for him.”
“Seonghwa never told me you were friends…” you muttered, wondering why he had refused to come with you if he was friends with the tattoo artist. You put away your things and dropped your bag by the side of the chair. Hongjoong took the hint and got ready to get back to work.
“I’m sure he just didn’t think of telling you,” he muttered. “He texted me last night to tell me you were nervous about the appointment.”
His words hit you like a bag of bricks. Not only was Seonghwa friends with this guy, but he was also texting him about you. Maybe that was why Hongjoong had been so friendly from the beginning. You had the feeling that he had a constant natural charm, but his comforting words and kind smiles had made you think that maybe you were receiving special treatment for reasons other than friend-nepotism.
“Is it okay if I start again?” Hongjoong’s voice brought you out of your thoughts.
“Yeah, that’s fine,” you mumbled and closed your eyes as he put the needle into your skin again.
At the end of your session, the skin around your hip felt raw and sensitive, a testament to the meticulous work that had just been done. Hongjoong gently wiped off your skin with a wet paper towel, the coolness providing a brief respite from the heat and discomfort. His touch was careful, almost tender, as he ensured that no excess ink or blood marred the final reveal of your new tattoo.
"Go take a look in the mirror," he said, his voice soft and encouraging. You nodded, taking a deep breath before gingerly sliding off the chair. Your legs felt slightly shaky, both from the adrenaline rush and the prolonged stillness of the session. As you steadied yourself, you could feel Hongjoong's reassuring presence nearby, ready to assist if you needed it.
With cautious steps, you made your way over to the full-length mirror on the other side of the room. The anticipation built with each step, your heart pounding with a mix of excitement and nerves. When you finally stood in front of the mirror, you took a moment to compose yourself before lifting your shirt slightly to reveal your hip.
The fresh lines of the tattoo contrasted beautifully against your skin. Despite the slight irritation that surrounded the new ink, the design was incredibly striking. The intricate details and vibrant colors were even more stunning than you had imagined.
“This is gorgeous.” You gasped and turned back around to Hongjoong.
With your sweater still bunched up you showed him the piece with a small smile, as if he hadn’t been looking at it for the past few hours. Still, he approached you and crouched down a little to inspect it. He wore a small, giddy smile; you couldn’t help but think that for someone who looked like he could kill you with a single glare, his mannerisms were awfully cute. After giving you a proud nod, he backed away from you.
“Some of my best work,” he commented. “Do you mind if I take a picture of it and put it on my Instagram?”
“Not at all, go ahead.”
Hongjoong went to look for his phone and you stayed in the same position, with your sweater still bunched up and your pants almost falling off due to the strings being untied. It was an awkward position, but you didn’t know if you were allowed to move yet. Hongjoong soon came back with his phone in hand and crouched down right in front of you to take a picture of your hip and waist.
“Thank you.” He stood back up and inspected the photo as you put your clothes on properly. “Oh, hold on– before you put everything back on, I have to wrap it up for you.”
You froze as you were about to pull on the string of your pants, and Hongjoong let out a panicked laugh as he went over to the cart with materials. He took out a roll of some white plastic with green stripes in a criss-cross pattern and a big blue line in the middle of it. When he came back to you, he measured it to the size of the tattoo before he cut it off. 
“This is Second Skin,” he said and parted it open in the middle of the blue line. “It’ll feel a bit weird, but you’ll get used to it pretty quickly.”
He pulled off a top layer and pressed the now sticky side to your stomach. His hands were warm now that he didn’t have the rubber gloves on. A shiver sent down your spine as he smoothed out the plastic against your skin. After he expertly pulled away another plastic layer, the Second Skin lived up to its name - you barely felt it. You were much too distracted by the loss of Hongjoong’s hands against your abdomen.
“I’ll give you some more of this stuff so that you can reapply it yourself after twenty-four hours. Then you’re going to want to leave this on for three to five days, and then peel it off under running water. It’s not difficult at all, just take one of the top corners and slowly take it off,” he explained as he examined his application. “You might get some ink bubbles in there, that’s fine you can just leave it- and if your skin gets red where the plastic is applied, that’s normal too. If you’re unsure, you can always just send me an email.”
You hummed and turned back to the mirror, inspecting the now plastic-covered tattoo. You caught Hongjoong’s eyes on you in the mirror, but he wasn’t looking at the tattoo. He was just looking at you - all of you. However, his eyes quickly diverted as he saw that you had caught him in the act.
“Thank you,” you said as you went back to tying the strings to your pants. “I really love it.”
“I’m glad,” he answered. “Listen, I’ve got to go out to the reception- but take as long as you need to get yourself ready. We’ll handle the payment as soon as you’re done, and I’ll get you some more Second Skin and a lotion you can use at home. On the house.”
“Oh, no- I’ll pay for it, I don’t mind,” you argued.
“You’re Seonghwa’s friend, he’d get mad at me if I didn’t.” He walked towards the door to give you some privacy. “Besides, it’s your first tattoo- I have to give you some incentive to come back.”
As if you didn’t have enough reason to come back already…
✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦
The next few days, all you could think about was your cute tattoo artist. Hongjoong's comforting atmosphere, his pretty smile, and his charming words were plaguing both your waking and sleeping hours. His presence lingered in your thoughts, like a sweet yet torturous melody you couldn’t escape. During the day, you found yourself daydreaming about his soft eyes and the way he had meticulously worked on your tattoo. At night, your dreams were filled with his voice, his touch, and the mesmerizing red of his hair. It was as if he had left an indelible mark not just on your skin, but on your mind and heart as well.
Conversations with your friends became dominated by your incessant musings about him. "I can't believe I didn’t ask for his number," you would lament, your frustration palpable. Your friends, patient at first, were growing tired of your constant complaints. Their sympathetic nods were starting to turn into exasperated eye-rolls. "Just ask Seonghwa for his number," they would suggest, not realizing that this simple solution was a source of internal conflict for you.
Seonghwa was the one person you hadn’t confided in about your infatuation. Now that you knew he was friends with the red-haired man, you didn’t dare tell him a thing. The thought of revealing your feelings to Seonghwa filled you with a mixture of embarrassment and fear. When he asked how your tattoo appointment went, you kept your response strictly about the tattooing process, carefully avoiding any mention of the charming artist who had captured your heart.
A week had passed since your tattoo appointment, and you found yourself in a bar with your friends, trying to shake off the haze of infatuation that seemed to follow you everywhere. The Second Skin had been removed, revealing your tattoo in all its healed glory. Despite the itchy phase that had begun, you did your absolute best not to scratch or touch it, knowing how crucial this period was for the healing process. Each prickling sensation on your hip served as a reminder of Hongjoong, making it even harder to move on.
You nursed your drink in your hands, staring into the glass with sad, distracted eyes. The ambient chatter and laughter of the bar did little to lift your spirits. As your friends' conversation ebbed, they noticed your slumped shoulders and the faraway look in your eyes.
“Please tell me you’re not thinking about him again.” One of your friends groaned.
“They can’t help that they have a crush!” Another one defended you.
You looked up at all of them. They quieted down as you opened your mouth to say something. However, you quickly shut your mouth again and went to chug your drink instead. The glass hit the table as you finished it, and you hissed at the feeling in your throat.
"Hey, you okay?" one of them asked, their voice tinged with concern.
You looked up, forcing a smile that didn’t quite reach your eyes. "Yeah, just... thinking."
"About him again?" another friend teased gently, though their eyes were sympathetic.
You sighed deeply, swirling the liquid in your glass. "I just can't get him out of my head. It's like he's everywhere I turn."
"Maybe it's a sign," one friend suggested. "Maybe you should just go back to the shop and see him again. You know, for a touch-up or something."
The idea sent a jolt of both excitement and fear through you. The thought of seeing Hongjoong again was intoxicating, but so was the fear of making a fool of yourself. "I don't know," you murmured. "I don’t want to come off as desperate."
"Desperate? No way. You’re just interested. There's nothing wrong with that," another friend chimed in. "Besides, from what you've told us, he seemed pretty interested in you too."
“Just go back to the shop and ask him out. If you won’t ask Seonghwa for help, you have to help yourself.”
Their words gave you a flicker of hope, though your insecurities quickly tried to snuff it out. "Maybe," you conceded, taking a sip of your drink.
As the night went on, you continued to ponder their advice, your mind a whirl of possibilities and anxieties. The itch of your healing tattoo was a constant reminder of the artist who had given it to you, and you couldn’t help but wonder if fate was nudging you to take a chance.
A couple of days later, you were standing outside of INK’D once again. You had even dressed up for the occasion, which now felt a little pathetic. Nevertheless, you walked up to the door and pulled it open. It looked exactly as it had the last time you were there, which shouldn’t be a surprise since it hadn’t been that long. Glancing around the shop, you couldn’t find Hongjoong anywhere. Until you heard his laugh, you were starting to think that he wasn’t even there. 
Your eyes immediately followed the sound of his gentle laugh. Behind the reception, stood Hongjoong as he talked with a customer. The shop hadn’t changed, but Hongjoong certainly had. His hair was now shorter and bleach blond, he had a new eyebrow piercing that matched his other silver jewelry, and you could swear that he had gotten even more tattoos - but maybe that was just because he wore a more revealing shirt. The customer on the other side of the desk was a gorgeous woman, who looked to be just a few years older than you. Her arms were also covered in tattoos, and her hair was dyed a fiery red almost like Hongjoong had before. The two of them were leaning against the counter, talking about something that was apparently very interesting - seeing as Hongjoong’s eyes were completely transfixed on her.
You felt stupid in your cute crop top and midi-skirt, feeling the need to hide the single tattoo that you had purposefully left exposed earlier - being surrounded by people who had tattoos all over their skin somehow made you feel self-conscious of only having one, almost to the point that it would’ve felt better to have none at all. The customer paid and left. You were about to follow her out, but it was too late. Hongjoong had spotted you.
“Y/N, you’re back!” he said as you reluctantly approached the counter. “Is everything okay? Is the tattoo healing as it should?”
He looked a little worried, and it hit you that coming in unannounced like this may cause suspicion. This was the last thing you wanted. You felt the heat rise to your cheeks and an anxious clump building up in the back of your throat.
“Oh, the tattoo's fine, really, it's just a little itchy right now—well, more than a little, actually—but I know that's part of the process and I'm trying my best not to scratch it, even though it's really tempting. You said it would be like this while it heals, right? So I'm not too worried, but I can't help feeling a bit anxious about it. I'm just reminding myself it's normal, and honestly, I can't wait to see how it looks once it's fully healed," you rambled but stopped as you saw Hongjoong smiling at you.
His eyes were warm and gentle, but his smile was playful. It was a cruel combination of features to put on such a kind man. Why did everything about him have to leave you speechless? Your long pause caused Hongjoong to speak up.
“Did you come in to book another appointment then, or what’s up?”
He leaned against the counter again, looking up at you with sparkling eyes. The new hair suited him, although it looked like it had gotten a little damaged. Still, he looked just as pretty as last time, and you felt your words get caught up in your throat. You couldn’t ask him out, not now or ever.
“I wanted to…” You looked over at a sign about drop-in piercings that stood on the counter, standing there like your savior. “...get a piercing.”
The words came out of you before you could process them. You had been thinking of getting another piercing soon, but you had no plans on doing it today. However, it was the only way for you to get out of the awkward position you were about to put yourself in.
“Ah, really?” Maybe it was a trick of the light, but you almost thought he looked disappointed for a second. “Well, our piercer is out for lunch at the moment, so you’d have to wait for a while- that is if you don’t mind that I do it. I’ve done piercings before, but it’s been a while.”
“I don’t mind.” You heard yourself saying. To be fair, you were only there to see him - so having him pierce you maybe wouldn’t be so bad.
So there you were. Back in Hongjoong’s room, sitting on his leather tattoo chair. This time it was lower to the ground, allowing him to get closer to your head. You had decided on another ear piercing, adding to the ones that were already there. Hongjoong had stepped out to get his coworker’s equipment, and you were left alone with your thoughts. The prickly feeling under your skin wouldn’t go away, no matter how many deep breaths you took. You had one thing to do today, and you couldn’t even bring yourself to do it. Technically, you didn’t even have the money for a piercing - the tattoo was supposed to be the thing you treated yourself with after working so much lately, so you had only budgeted for that. You were lucky that the piercings weren’t as expensive.
“Alright, this should be all that I need.” Hongjoong snatched you out of your thoughts as he slipped back into the room. 
He organized his station on the rolling table beside your chair. You watched his ringed fingers, admiring his pretty painted nails - wondering if he made the cute designs on them himself. His hands moved quickly and steadily, his eyes analyzing the different items he had brought with him. Despite saying that he hadn’t done this in a while, it certainly looked like he had. Everything about him was authentic, in a way that was both comforting and intimidating.
“Nervous?” he asked. “You’re quiet.”
“I’m just thinking,” you admitted, and he turned to you with a piqued interest. 
“Want to share what’s in that pretty little head of yours, then?” The words came out of him so naturally that it almost felt wrong that your body had such a strong reaction to them. 
“Oh, it’s nothing. Work mostly,” you lied and looked down at your dangling feet as you desperately tried to find another subject to talk about. “Does this piercing hurt a lot?”
“It’ll sting,” he admits and looks up at you with that warm smile of his. “But I’ll be gentle, love.”
If Hongjoong wasn’t staring right at you, you’d clutch your chest and lean back against the chair at his words. Instead, you’re gripping the edge of the seat, and hoping that it’s not too obvious that he’s got such an effect on you. An “okay,” that sounded more like a peep than a word, came bubbling up your throat, and Hongjoong stifled a laugh at, what you could only assume was, your innate ability to make a fool out of yourself.
“I’m going to puncture the skin with this.” Hongjoong held up a needle to you. “And then I’ll push in this piercing.” He showed you a simple stud that matched the rest of the metals you were wearing. You nodded carefully, giving him a worried glance. It has been a while since your last piercing and even though you knew you had nothing to be scared of, you couldn’t help but be irrational. Hongjoong notices your nervous state and puts his hand on your knee. His palm is warm, burning through the material of your midi skirt.
“You’ve got this.” That was all he said before he stood up beside you.
His head was right by yours as he angled the needle against the ink dot he had placed on your skin earlier. You could feel his breath against your skin, his warmth radiating from his chest. This man had to secretly be a radiator with the amount of heat he was giving off. You closed your eyes as the tip of the needle made contact with your ear.
“Ready?” Hongjoong asked.
“Yeah,” you murmured back.
The needle prodded through your skin, and it stung just as he said it would. A quiet gasp flew out of you as he pierced through your ear. Hongjoong left the needle and grabbed the small stud again.
“You’re doing so good,” he mumbled as he fidgeted with the earring. “I’m almost done, love.”
You took a deep breath and Hongjoong got back to work. Before you knew it, you had a new piercing.
Your right ear was burning ever so slightly as you were making your purchase at the front desk. You found yourself frequently trying to touch your ear, and then quickly putting your hand down again at the sight of Hongjoong’s warning glare. His small talk had quieted down as you pushed in your code to complete the transaction. The lack of words exchanged only made the air feel more stuffy. When the receipt rolls out of the machine, Hongjoong quickly grabs it and hands it to you. Your hand brushes against his as you take it, and sparks are sent flying through your bloodstream. This was your last chance to ask him out…
“I can’t wait to see you again,” he said with a wink, and your words got stuck in your throat.
“Thanks!” you squeak out before turning on your heel and all but bolting out of the tattoo shop.
That night, you met up with your friends at your usual bar, sporting new earrings but still no love confession to speak of. Your friends were almost more annoyed with you than you were with yourself for the lack of action. As soon as you told them the story, they all groaned in unison, a chorus of exasperation that filled the dimly lit space.
"You've got to be kidding me," one of them said, shaking their head. "What happened this time?"
“I said ‘Thanks!’ when I left, like an idiot.” You groaned and put your head in your hands.
“What? How is that bad?”
You tried to explain, telling them how Hongjoong was just out of your league and how you didn't have the guts to ask him out. They weren't having it, though. They kept trying to hype you up, their voices a mix of encouragement and frustration. "Come on, you can't give up now!" one urged, while another complained about your tendency to chicken out.
Drinks were downed in rapid succession, the alcohol fueling your emotions. Tiny shouts of anger and regret burst from your lips every so often, punctuating the lively conversation. Each time you vented, your friends would nod sympathetically or roll their eyes, depending on how many times they'd heard the same lament.
Just as you were about to resign yourself to a night of self-pity, you saw Seonghwa walking towards your table. Your body reacted on its own, your hand shooting up to point at him. In your slightly inebriated state, your finger ended up pointing slightly past him. One of your friends quickly helped you correct your aim, turning your arm toward the startled man.
"You know Hongjoong!" you blurted out as if this was news to him.
Seonghwa raised an eyebrow, clearly amused. "What happened to 'hello'? 'How was your day?' 'Was work okay?' You have to relax," he said, his tone gentle as he sat down on the chair in front of yours. "I heard that you didn’t ask him out."
You felt a fresh wave of embarrassment wash over you. "Do you know when his next shift is?" you asked, ignoring his attempt to make small talk.
Seonghwa sighed, a mix of amusement and mild frustration. "In two days, I think... why?"
You took a deep breath, steeling yourself for what you were about to say. "I'm going back," you declared, mostly to yourself but loud enough for everyone to hear. "I won’t chicken out this time!"
Your friends erupted into cheers, their excitement palpable. "That's the spirit!" one of them exclaimed, raising their glass in a toast. "To not chicken out!"
Seonghwa smiled, shaking his head slightly. "Just be yourself," he advised, his voice kind. "Hongjoong's a good guy."
You nodded, feeling a renewed sense of determination. The night continued with more drinks and lively conversation, but this time, there was a spark of hope in your heart. As the evening wound down, you found yourself thinking about what you would say to Hongjoong, rehearsing possible scenarios in your mind.
When you finally left the bar, the cool night air was a welcome relief. Your friends hugged you goodbye, their encouragement ringing in your ears. "You've got this," they assured you, their support unwavering.
You regret your words as you stand in front of the tattoo shop, two days later. Nevertheless, you’re determined to do it. Partially because it was about damn time, but also because Seonghwa had relentlessly teased you about not being able to do it, and now you can’t face him ever again if you fail. You haven’t had a date in at least a year, and this was the first guy in real life you’d found remotely attractive since then. He was attractive, kind, and just your type. It was now or never—you just had to go for it. With what you hoped were confident steps, you walked up to the door and swung it open... only to find the shop empty. The sound of someone rustling around in the back rooms caught your attention.
“Hello?” you called out, walking up to the receptionist's desk.
“Just a second!” It was Hongjoong’s voice, coming from further inside the shop.
Sure enough, Hongjoong walked out of his tattoo room thirty seconds later. His hair was still a blond mess, but now he was wearing a perfectly fitted, black button-down with the sleeves rolled up. If you hadn’t been able to restrain yourself, your jaw would be on the floor. He wore a customer service smile, which faltered at the sight of you, turning into a genuine grin. He walked up to the reception with a spring in his step.
“Getting multiple things done in a week, huh?” he said, a playful look in his eyes. “Are you a masochist or something?”
The previous confidence you felt transformed into a ball of shame in your chest. You couldn’t look him in the eyes as your face grew hotter and hotter. Hongjoong noticed your freak-out and immediately went into panic mode himself.
“Oh shit—I'm sorry, I don’t know why I said that. That was too far—”
“It’s okay—”
“I’m really sorry, I didn’t mean to offend you—”
“I’m not offended—”
“Please don’t take this as a bad reflection of the shop, I don’t know why—”
“I came here to ask you out.”
The words flew out of you without warning, catching both you and Hongjoong off guard. They lingered in the air as the tension built up until it was thick enough to cut with a knife. The longer it took him to answer, the more anxious you were getting. With a soft, pitiful chuckle, you looked down at your shoes.
“Never mind,” you mumbled. “I’m sorry—it was stupid—”
“No, Y/N—”
“No, no, it’s fine. Don’t feel pressured to say anything, please.” You looked back up at him and gave him a polite smile. “Thank you for everything, I’ll be… I’ll leave.”
Without waiting another second to hear his response, you turned around and walked out of the shop, shame weighing down your shoulders.
For the next few days, you stayed in bed for most of the day, only going out to go to work or get groceries. You’d do anything to avoid your friends, and you were doing everything in your power to never see Hongjoong again. Have you planned on going to him for another tattoo sometime in the future? Yes, but that was out of the question now. The scene kept replaying in your head—his shocked expression and how poorly you had handled it. You couldn’t remember the last time you had made that big of a fool of yourself.
Lying in bed, staring at the ceiling, you kept replaying every detail of that embarrassing encounter. You wondered what possessed you to blurt out your feelings like that, why you hadn’t just played it cool or at least waited for a more appropriate moment. Each time you thought about it, a fresh wave of humiliation washed over you. Your friends' encouraging words now felt like cruel jokes. Why would he ever go out with you? It was stupid to even let your friends suggest that you should go for it.
Every time your phone buzzed with a message from Seonghwa or anyone else, you felt a pang of anxiety, worried it was another reminder of your failed confession. You avoided social media, not wanting to see anything that might remind you of Hong or the tattoo shop. Even the sight of your tattoo in the mirror was enough to send you spiraling back into regret.
Days blended into each other, each one marked by a series of small, mundane tasks that you performed on autopilot. The only solace you found was in the brief moments of distraction that work could provide. Yet, even in those moments, Hongjoong’s image—his smile, his kindness, and that playful glint in his eye—kept creeping back into your mind.
Why did it have to be so difficult? You’d always been so cautious, so careful with your heart, and now this one act of bravery—or foolishness—had left you feeling more exposed and vulnerable than ever before. The fear of facing rejection again loomed large, and you couldn’t bear the thought of putting yourself through that kind of pain once more.
✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦
On the seventh day, there was a knock at your apartment door. Thinking that it was the food you had ordered, you begrudgingly made your way to your door. To avoid having a stranger see the mess of a state you were in, you only opened it far enough for someone to pass the bag of food to you. A perfectly manicured hand wrapped around the side of your door and pulled it all the way open.
“Seonghwa!” Your eyes widened at the man in front of you.
“It’s been four days and you’ve declined all of our meetups,” he said. “What’s wrong?”
Your bottom lip quivered. It wasn’t as if you had gone through heartbreak, or had broken up with a long-term partner, but Seonghwa always managed to get you to crack as soon as you were remotely upset. You threw your arms around him and sobbed against his chest.
“I fucked up, and he totally hates me now!” you wailed in between sobs.
Seonghwa let out a soft sigh and gently patted your back as he invited himself inside. While it was difficult to move around while still holding him, you refused to let go. Your friend stayed with you by your front door, patting your back and mumbling “there, there” every few seconds. After some time of crying, your sobs slowly dying down, there was another knock at the door.
“Food delivery!”
“Coming!” Seonghwa answered. “Go inside, okay? I’ll get that for you, and then we can sit down and talk.”
Seonghwa made himself a cup of tea while you ate your dinner. He hadn’t said anything since the delivery guy had left, and you were trying your best to ignore the tension growing from it. You could practically hear him thinking from where you sat on your couch. Seonghwa was simply watching you from the kitchen counter, where he was leaning and sipping his tea, and waiting for you to make the first move.
“I may have overreacted,” you finally said after finishing your plate. “But I don’t think I’ll ever see him again- just out of embarrassment, really.”
“So you asked him out and he said no?” Seonghwa approached the couch and sat down next to you.
“Well, not really…” You looked at him suspiciously. “You’re not going to tell him we talked, right? I know you’re friends, he told me.”
“I know he told you.” He sighed and put down his cup on your coffee table. “And no, I won’t tell him anything. I’m your friend too, you know?”
“How can I be so sure when you didn’t even tell me that you have a tattoo?” you argued playfully. “How have you hidden a back tattoo from everyone?”
“Don’t change the subject,” he warned. “What happened? Did he say no?”
“Hasn’t he told you already?”
“I haven’t seen him since last week.”
“Oh…” You fidgeted with your fingers and took a deep breath before continuing. “I walked in there, got nervous, and blurted it out like an idiot. He looked so shocked that I just walked out…”
“You didn’t even let him answer?” Seonghwa exclaimed.
You put your head in your hands with a big groan. Falling on your side, you put your head on your friend’s lap - silently asking him to pat your back again. Seonghwa put a hand on your shoulder, while the other played with your hair. You wanted so desperately to know his secrets to have his shit together, but you knew that he’d never tell you — instead, he’d just tell you that you’ll “figure it out.” Whatever that means.
“I just wanted to spare him from having to let me down,” you explained. “It was written all over his face.”
“Y/N, you wouldn’t know what that guy was thinking even if it actually was written on his face,” Seonghwa answered with another sigh. “I can talk to him for you if you want to.”
“You’re not my mom,” you said, “And he’s not my middle school bully.”
“No, you’re right, I’m your mutual friend who could settle this miscommunication…”
You sat back up, facing away from Seonghwa. Rationally, you knew that he was right and that you probably should try to smooth things over. However, you didn’t want to make it worse by not being able to do it yourself. 
“I’m fine, I promise,” you muttered.
“Okay…” He stood up and walked over to your door. “Then you’re coming out with me tomorrow. At our usual place, around eight, okay? Dress up cute, you deserve to feel luxurious.”
“Fine.”
At eight PM the next day, you’re standing outside the bar where you’d promise Seonghwa you’d meet him. To make yourself feel better, you dressed up for the occasion - wearing the items in your closet that you never got a chance to wear otherwise. The cold crept in as the evening turned darker, and you were starting to regret your pretty but short dress. Lucky for you, you saw your friend walking up the street with long steps - it doesn’t take long for him to get to you.
“Sorry, I’m late- work, you know?” He immediately grabbed your arm and led you through the doors to the bar. “You look great.”
“Thank you?” You’re not sure he heard you as he pulled you through the loud crowd to your usual table in the corner, where someone was already sitting.
Your mouth fell open as you saw who was sitting in your usual seat. Hongjoong was looking right at you, just as shocked as he was the last time you saw him. His hair was still blond, mostly hidden under a beat-up, black cap that looked like he had decorated it himself—no manufactured cap could look so creative and authentically him. He stood up to greet Seonghwa, but his eyes never left yours. You couldn't tell if he was checking you out or questioning his decision to come here. You couldn't help but check him out; he was dressed more casually than you but still somehow outdressed you. The sleeves of his black hoodie were pushed up, revealing tattoos that curled up his forearms, and his jeans were artfully distressed. Seonghwa all but forced you to sit down on the couch seat next to Hongjoong.
"I'll get us drinks!" Seonghwa shouted as he walked back into the crowd.
You hadn't had time to process what was happening, but as Seonghwa left, you were filled with embarrassment and pure rage—the latter almost overpowering the former. Almost.
"Hi," Hongjoong said, his voice a familiar blend of calm and curiosity.
He was sitting close enough to talk normally, and you could feel the warmth radiating from him, just like when he had given you that piercing—a constant reminder of your embarrassment. Only a truly cruel creature would curse you with an uncomfortable new hole in your ear that you had to ever so carefully take care of, which, on top of everything, made you think about Hongjoong. However, considering that you had just been freezing, you welcomed his warmth, to the point where you had to keep yourself from leaning closer to him. His scent, a mix of cedarwood and something distinctly him was both comforting and disarming.
"Hi," you replied, trying to keep your voice steady.
Before either of you could speak any further, Seonghwa came back with two bottles of soju and two small glasses. He put them down in front of you, giving you both a look that could only be described as a parent telling their kids to make up after a fight.
"Talk." He pushed the bottles toward the two of you and took a few steps away from the table. "I'm not going to be your messenger."
"Wait, where are you going?" you asked, a hint of panic in your voice.
"Home! To my cat!" He smiled and waved before disappearing into the crowd.
Hongjoong leaned back in his seat with a scoff, making you look over at him. His head was leaning back against the wall, and his eyes were shut tight as if trying to find some inner peace. Suddenly, he sat back up and picked up one of the bottles. As he opened a bottle of soju, he motioned for you to pick up one of the glasses. You did as he asked, and he poured you a shot, the liquid shimmering in the dim light of the room.
“Might as well, right?” he said.
“Right…” You nodded and put the glass to your lips.
“You look pretty.” His words made you choke on the liquid as it came down your throat.
Hongjoong apologized profusely as he patted your back while you coughed. You looked up at him with teary eyes, and the worried look in his eye changed to his usual playful look. The two of you broke out in laughter, the tension finally releasing you from its grasp.
“Off to a good start,” you said and picked up the bottle to offer to pour him a shot.
He accepted the drink, and the two of you took a shot together. Hongjoong’s knee was grazing against yours and, despite the burning sensation, you refused to remove it. As he put down his empty glass, he turned to you.
“I’m sorry about before,” he said, “I was going to say something- you just surprised me.”
“Please, it’s not your fault… I shouldn’t have asked you out in the first place.” You sighed as you poured yourself another drink. “I should know better than to assume your good customer service was flirting.”
“But I was flirting.”
You whipped your head to face him again. He was so casual about it, taking another drink before meeting your gaze. Hongjoong smiled as if he hadn’t just said what he had said, and you felt an overwhelming urge to disappear for at least a few months. The nonchalance in his expression, combined with the casual lift of his glass, made you feel like the ground had shifted beneath you.
“You were flirting?” you asked and looked down at your hands. “So I was overreacting this entire time?”
“Well, I didn’t exactly handle it great,” he countered. “I think you had every right to be upset by my reaction- even if it would’ve been nice if you had stayed to hear my answer first.”
“Sorry…”
“Don’t be sorry.” He leaned his head down to try to meet your lowered gaze. “We’re here now, right?”
You looked up at him, and he gave you a lopsided grin that you couldn’t help but return. Maybe it was the alcohol or maybe you were just feeling butterflies in your stomach, nevertheless, your skin was tingling all over.
“Even if it was orchestrated by our friend,” you added.
“Yeah… can’t say that I hate him for it, though.” He turned to pour himself another drink, but you could see his shy smile.
“So?” you said, suddenly more confident as you leaned in a little closer to him.
“What?” He looked back at you, his nose inches away from yours.
“Would you go out on a date with me?”
“Sure. Wanna go now?”
That’s how you end up walking beside Hongjoong to a small restaurant that he had looked up just a few minutes earlier. It was close to the bar, but you were already freezing after just a few minutes. You glanced at the jacket hanging over Hongjoong’s arm - it felt a little cliché of him to have a leather jacket, but you suppose it’s part of his charm - and pray that he can sense that you’re freezing.
“Aren’t you cold?” you asked.
“Not really,” he replied. “Are you?”
“A little,” you mumbled.
He picked up his jacket from his arm, and got your hopes up, only to put it down on the other arm - the one furthest away from you. Your brows furrowed slightly but before your brain could start spinning ideas, he wrapped his arm around your shoulders. He had given you a taste of his warmth before, but now it overflowed in you. You kept your eyes on your feet as you kept walking, and Hongjoong bent down to try to find your gaze.
“Warm?” he asked.
“Why’d you…” You couldn’t find any words, too engrossed in his embrace.
“What? Did you want my jacket?” He finally got you to look at him, and flashed you a teasing grin. “Cute.”
He must have been a little tipsy — as evident by the pink glow on his cheeks — because, while he had been confident before, you had never seen him so comfortable being a flirt like he was right now. Hongjoong let go of you and took his jacket to wrap around your shoulders. The jacket was heavy and his scent lingered on it, it was a constant reminder of what his hold would feel like. A while ago, you would’ve never believed that you’d be in this position - now that you were, it was almost overwhelming.
“The restaurant’s over there!” Hongjoong grabbed your hand and led the way, completely unaware of the effect he had on you. “Let’s go!”
“Favorite color?”
“Red and yellow.”
“Really? Not black?”
“I like colors, too.”
You hummed and picked up another fry. The restaurant Hongjoong had found was a cute 50s-themed diner - the kind with big milkshakes and long, plastic menus. It was late, and this had been the only thing open that you didn’t need a reservation for. The milkshake you shared was almost gone, and the fries were half-eaten and getting cold. Both of you stuck out in your colorful booth - you for being so dressed up, and Hongjoong for being dressed in all black. It wasn’t the kind of date you’d brag to your friends about, but you were still having a good time. 
“What is your…” Hongjoong leaned back and paused to think of his next question. “... favorite ice cream flavor?”
The two of you had been going back and forth, asking each other banal questions to get to know each other better - getting through the questions quickly “to make up for lost time,” as Hongjoong had put it.
“Hm… that’s hard,” you muttered. “I do like mint-choco–”
“No…” Hongjoong groaned and pinched the bridge of his nose in disappointment. “You’re seriously into chocolate and toothpaste?”
“It doesn’t taste like toothpaste!” You giggled. “You can’t judge me, you like minions.”
“They’re cute!”
“They’re horrible!” you countered. 
“Maybe you just have bad taste.” Hongjoong ate another fry before meeting your eyes again, slightly more serious. “Except for tattoos, I think your design was really sick.”
You leaned against the table, the plastic sticking to your warm skin - just a few seconds ago you had been freezing, but now you could practically be the heat source for your entire apartment complex. 
“It’s all you,” you said earnestly. “You really brought it to life.”
He leaned against the table with his forearms as well, his hand getting closer and closer to yours but his eyes never looked away from your face.
“If you keep complimenting me like that, I’m going to start thinking you’re trying to seduce me.” His middle finger reached yours, and you swore you could feel sparks coming from where they met.
Maybe it’s the lighting, but you swear that his brown eyes go on forever. The lighting can’t make everything else disappear, though - that was just him. Hongjoong’s hand inched closer until it covered the back of your hand. The intricate tattoos on his hand were faded, but it made it seem more genuine. This feeling was dangerous, you knew that - but can’t you allow yourself one night of indulgence? As you were about to reply, the waitress came up to your table.
“Is everything alright over here?” she asked with a classic customer service tone, but her tapping foot told a different story from her bright smile.
“Yeah, thank you.” You sat back in your seat, pulling your hand with you and onto your lap - you could no longer look Hongjoong in the eye, not now when the spell was interrupted.
“Alright, just checking in,” the waitress continued. “Just to let you know, we close in about fifteen minutes.”
“Oh, don’t worry, we were about to leave now anyway,” Hongjoong answered and stood up from his seat and put enough cash on the table to cover the cost of the food and a tip. “Can I walk you home, Y/N?”
You looked up at him as he held his hand out to you. With little to no hesitation, you grabbed the leather jacket by your side and took his hand. The two of you said goodbye to the waitress and thanked her, before quickly leaving the establishment.
Hongjoong walked you home, the two of you talking all the way to your apartment. You asked him about his practice, and he asked you about your plans for the future once you had told him you didn’t want to continue being a barista. His jacket was wrapped around your shoulders again, but now his hand was in yours - keeping you more than warm. The streetlights were illuminating your path toward your apartment complex, and you could already see the building in the distance. A sudden urge to slow your steps down struck you then - a need to slow time to make his presence last. Maybe it was his warmth or the way he laughed at every silly joke you said, but you couldn’t help but want to spend more time with him. You’re so lost in your world, that you don’t even realize that Hongjoong has quieted down - or that he’s staring at you.
“What are you thinking about?” he asked. “Are you okay?”
“I’m just tired,” you answered, almost too quickly.
“It’s late.” He nodded. “Where’s your place?”
“Just up ahead.” You pointed to your building and let your arm fall to your side again. “You don’t have to walk me all the way if you don’t want to.”
“I want to.” He shrugged. “I liked spending time with you tonight.”
While his eyes were fixated on the building not too far from you, you took the time to study his profile. Enamored with the sharp lines of his face — his nose, his jaw, his cheekbones — you found yourself wanting to look at him for just a little bit longer; as if you had wasted so much time by looking away out of shyness. Before you knew it, you arrived at the door to your apartment complex and Hongjoong stopped walking.
“I’ll wait for you to get inside,” he promised as he turned to you with a boyish smile.
You almost wanted to ask him to come up to your place, but decided it would be too forward for a first date. If he had been anyone else you might’ve invited him up, but Hongjoong was the type of person you wanted to savor. 
“Goodnight, then,” you said with a smile and started walking to the door.
“I’m glad that Seonghwa made me come out tonight,” he added quickly and you turned back to him. “Really glad.”
Within a few steps, you were right next to him again. Leaning towards him, you pressed a kiss on his cheek. He took your jaw in your hands, bringing you closer for a real kiss. It was short and chased, but you could feel the effort it took for him to break the kiss as the air around you became thick. 
“I’m glad, too,” you murmured. 
“Goodnight, then,” he mimicked you.
“Goodnight.” You gave him a last smile before turning around and walking into your apartment building.
✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦
A few days passed before you saw Hongjoong again. During that time, you couldn't stop talking your friends' ears off about him—every conversation seemed to circle back to his smile, his style, and the way he made you feel. Your friends, exasperated yet amused, repeatedly urged you to ask him out on another date already. The only problem was that you still hadn’t gotten his number. Despite this, luck seemed to be on your side. 
The late shift had been brutal. You were exhausted, every muscle in your body ached, and all you wanted was to collapse into bed. The chaos of the day had left the place in disarray, and cleaning up had taken what little energy you had left. As you dragged your feet towards the exit, you heard your name being called out.
You turned, slightly puzzled, to see Hongjoong standing beside a sleek red motorbike. You blinked in surprise, not having expected him to be the type to ride a motorcycle. The sight was jarring at first, but then you realized it actually fit perfectly with his whole aesthetic—edgy, confident, and effortlessly cool. His face lit up with a smile that made your heart skip a beat. You hadn't seen him in a while, and the sight of him brought a rush of mixed emotions.
"Hey! Need a ride home?" he called out, holding up a spare helmet.
“How did you know my shift ended now?” you questioned with an incredulous smile.
“I asked Seonghwa,” he explained with a shrug. “Thought, since I hadn’t seen you in a while, I’d offer you a lift.”
“You did?” You felt your face grow warm as he walked over to you. “That’s very sweet of you…”
“So can I?” he asked.
You had no clue what he was talking about, as you were too distracted by everything about him. Now that he had come a little closer, you could smell the faint scent of his intoxicating perfume. An urge to wrap your arms around him hit you then, and you had to press your nails into your palms to stop yourself.
“Can you what?” You looked up at him with big eyes.
“Drive you home?” He let out a small laugh that had your heart beating a mile per minute.
You blinked, processing the offer. "Uh, sure," you replied, your voice wavering with nerves and excitement.
Hongjoong's grin widened. "Great! Hop on."
Hongjoong walked back to the bike, got you a helmet, and helped you put it on. With shaky hands, you took the helmet and fastened it on, feeling a flutter of nerves in your stomach. Climbing onto the bike behind him, you hesitated for a moment before wrapping your arms around his waist. The engine roared to life, and you clung to him tightly as the bike sped off into the night.
The ride was a whirlwind of sensations. The cool evening air rushed past, the roar of the engine vibrated through you, and the warmth of Hongjoong's body against yours provided a strange comfort. Fear and exhilaration mingled as you held on, your heart pounding not just from the speed, but from the closeness to him.
When he finally pulled up in front of your place, you reluctantly let go and removed the helmet, your hair slightly tousled. Hongjoong turned to you with that infectious smile. He got off after you and walked you to the door of your apartment complex.
"Safe and sound," he said as you arrived at the door. "Hope the ride wasn’t too scary."
You shook your head, unable to suppress a grin. "No, it was... amazing. Thanks for the ride home, Hongjoong."
"Anytime," he replied, his eyes lingering on you for a moment longer. "Get some rest.”
It was a sure goodbye, but neither of you moved. You kept your eyes on him, and you couldn’t shake the building anticipation in your chest. A realization that you still didn’t have his number hit you—your eyes widened and you let out a soft gasp. Hongjoong raised his eyebrows in slight surprise, as he watched you rummage around your bag. Finally, you pulled out your phone.
“I don’t have your number!” you exclaimed.
“Well, we can’t have that, can we?” Hongjoong chuckled and took your phone in his hand.
The screen showed a new contact, and he typed his information into the small boxes. It only took a few seconds before he was done, and he handed you back the phone. “Tattoo guy,” it said in the box where his name should be.
“Tattoo guy?” You snorted. “Is that how you think I see you?”
“Okay wait, give it back. I’ll fix it.” Hongjoong chuckled and held out his hand.
You put the phone back in his hand, and he quickly typed something new in the name box. When you got your phone back it now said “Cute tattoo guy” instead. You smiled at the phone and looked back up at him.
“I’ll accept it.” You nodded.
“Good,” he said and paused to look at you. “I really want to kiss you again… is that okay?”
“More than okay.”
Hongjoong leaned down, capturing your lips with his for a chaste kiss that left you wanting more. Yet again, he didn’t give you more—but he smiled knowingly when he noticed how you chased after his lips. 
“Call me?" he asked.
"Definitely," you nodded, feeling a warmth spread through you at the prospect.
As you watched him ride off into the night, you couldn't help but feel a spark of something new and exciting igniting within you. The exhaustion of the shift faded away, replaced by a thrill.
After getting up to your apartment and getting ready for bed, you called him. You weren’t sure if he had meant “call me as soon as you can” when he had asked you to call him, but you didn’t know when else to call. Your heartbeat quickened with each ring before he eventually answered.
“Hello?”
You heard someone shushing other people in the background—maybe you were hallucinating, or it really sounded like Seonghwa. 
“Hongjoong?” you asked.
“Hi, sweetheart!” You heard him shuffle to get up, the murmurs continued before you heard a door open and shut—the wind was now the only background noise.
“Am I interrupting something?” you mumbled.
“Not at all, I’m just with a few friends,” he explained. “I was going to step out for a smoke anyway, they’ll just have to deal with my absence for a bit.”
You heard the sound of a pack of cigarettes opening and a lighter being lit. With the nerves slowly disappearing, you lay down on your back on your bed.
“You smoke?” you asked.
“Is that a turn-off?” he answered with a question. “I’ll stop if it is.”
“No, it’s fine.” You giggled and turned over on your stomach. “I’ve just never smelt any smoke on you before.”
“I don’t smoke that much. I’m trying to quit,” he admitted. “... just not very hard.”
The sound of him taking another drag from the cigarette echoed through the phone, and you let out another small laugh. You felt like you were in high school again, your feet kicking in the air in a slow rhythm.
“Is there a special reason you called tonight, or do you just miss me, sweetheart?” he asked.
“Ah, well… you said to call you and I wasn’t sure when I was supposed to…” you mumbled.
“You’re cute.” You could hear the smile in his voice. “I’m glad you called, actually. I wanted to ask you out on another date.”
You could feel your heart beating in your throat as you listened to Hongjoong's voice on the other end of the line. You fumbled around on your bed until you sat up, trying to calm your nerves. Even though he couldn't see you, you quickly fixed your now messed-up hair, wanting to feel more presentable. His laugh echoed through the phone, and you found yourself smiling, but your hands still shook a little. Talking to him made your heart race, and you couldn't help but imagine him right there with you.
“When?” you asked.
“I have a late appointment tomorrow,” he admitted. “But how about the day after that?”
“I could do that–” You hesitated and thought of your work schedule. “I have a shift until the afternoon, but I could meet you after.”
“Sounds great, I’ll pick you up after your shift. Just text me what time it ends and I’ll be there.” The sound of the door opening and the chatter from inside poured through the phone. Someone asked Hongjoong something and he told them to wait a minute. “Sorry, sweetheart, I have to hang up… text me later, okay?”
“I will,” you hummed. “Goodnight, Hongjoong.”
“Goodnight, Y/N,” he said melodically. 
You hung up with a big grin on your face. The only issue now was how you could ever fall asleep tonight.
The day of your date finally arrives. You finish your shift and eagerly text him the time you’ll be off your shift. True to his word, you spot him waiting for you outside your workplace on his sleek black motorbike, a charming smile lighting up his face as you approach.
“Hey, sweetheart,” he greets you warmly, swinging off the bike to offer you a helmet. “Ready for a little adventure?”
You grin, feeling a rush of excitement at the prospect of riding with him. “Absolutely!”
You hop on behind him, wrapping your arms around his waist as he starts the engine with a low rumble. The ride to the rooftop bar is exhilarating, the wind tousling your hair and the city passing by in a blur of lights. Hongjoong navigates effortlessly through the traffic, occasionally glancing back to check if you’re comfortable.
Arriving at the rooftop bar, you dismount gracefully, a thrill still lingering from the ride. Hongjoong leads you inside through a discreet entrance, where soft, ambient lighting and the distant hum of conversation immediately set a sophisticated and intimate mood. It’s a casual bar, making your nerves about being underdressed disappear. The bar is adorned with modern decor, plush seating, and a breathtaking view of the city skyline twinkling in the distance.
“This place looks amazing,” you comment, taking in the cozy atmosphere as you settle into your seat at a secluded table.
“I thought you might like it,” Hongjoong replies with a grin.
A waiter walks up and talks to Hongjoong like they’re old friends. He introduces himself to you as Yunho and offers the two of you free first drinks. While Hongjoong tries to decline, Yunho is adamant that he wants to leave a good impression on the person who’s had Hongjoong so distracted lately. With that teasing remark, Hongjoong lets up. Yunho leaves with a wink to you, telling you that he’ll be back with drinks soon.
“I thought he’d be normal about this,” Hongjoond admitted with a sigh. “Sorry…”
“I think he’s nice,” you said and looked over at him with a sly smile. “... I distract you?”
“No– well, yes, but…” You’ve never seen Hongjoong stumble over his words like this before, it’s a sight you could get used to. “I was at Yunho’s place when you called the other day. They haven’t stopped teasing me about it since.”
“I’m sorry,” you said with a not-so-sorry smile but decided to change the subject to be lenient on him. “How do you know each other?”
“He’s in a band I’ve written a few songs for,” he explained. “I’ll take you to one of their gigs sometime if you want.”
“That sounds fun.” You stare at him quizzically. “You just keep revealing new secrets to me, I’m wondering what else you’re hiding.”
“What?”
“It’s just that… there’s so much I don’t know about you, and everything new I learn surprises me.” 
You fidget with one of the napkins on the table. Hongjoong puts one of his hands on top of yours, finding his way to hold your hand. When you looked up at him, he was smiling—a smile that was more like a hug, comforting and soothing.
“I’ll tell you everything you want to know,” he said. “Soon it won’t be very surprising.”
“I’ll be honest… I don’t know how you could possibly top being a smoking, bike-riding, song-writer.” You let out a nervous chuckle.
Before he can answer, Yunho comes back with the drinks. As you sipped your cocktails, conversation flowed effortlessly between you. You talked about music, discovering Hongjoong’s unique taste, and deep knowledge of various genres. The live band started playing soft, soulful tunes, their melodies blending seamlessly with the murmurs of other patrons.
At one point, Hongjoong leans closer, his voice softening. “I’m really glad we could do this,” he says, his eyes locked on yours. “You look beautiful tonight.”
You blushed at his compliment, feeling a warmth spread through you. “Thank you,” you replied softly, meeting his gaze with a smile.
The night continued with laughter and meaningful conversation. Hongjoong suggested taking a walk along the rooftop’s edge, where you can feel the cool night breeze and admire the city lights below. You strolled hand in hand, the soft glow of the moon overhead adding to the enchanting atmosphere.
As the evening winds down, Hongjoong leads you back to his bike, helmet in hand. He helped you put it on with a gentle touch, the closeness making your heart race with anticipation. The ride home was quick, and Hongjoong drove carefully—although he only had one drink many hours ago, he told you that he didn’t want to risk it.
“Thank you for tonight,” you said softly, overwhelmed with gratitude for the wonderful evening.
“It was my pleasure,” Hongjoong replied warmly, his eyes reflecting the moonlight. “Can we do this again soon?”
You nodded eagerly, already looking forward to the next adventure with him.
“I’ll text you,” he promised, leaning in to give you a tender kiss on the cheek before you parted ways.
You watched him ride off into the night again, a contented smile on your face. This night, filled with exhilarating moments, heartfelt conversations, and a touch of romance, has left you certain of one thing—Hongjoong is someone special.
✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦
The following week, you decided to surprise Hongjoong with lunch. He had mentioned offhandedly that he often didn’t have time to grab something to eat between appointments, and you figured a little gesture of kindness would brighten his day—and give you a reason to see him again. You had the morning shift, and at the end of it, you made the lunch of any leftovers that your boss wouldn’t notice if it went missing. As soon as the clock struck twelve, and your shift was over, you headed out.
As you approached the studio, you saw Hongjoong through the window, chatting with a customer. Your heart sank when you realized it was the same person he had been talking to the last time you were here. She was as gorgeous and intimidating as the first time you had seen her. They were laughing, and the way she leaned in closely sent a pang of jealousy through you.
You hesitated at the door, debating whether to turn around and leave. Just as you were about to retreat, Hongjoong glanced up and his eyes met yours. His face lit up with that familiar, infectious smile, and he immediately bounced over to the door, leaving the customer mid-sentence.
"Y/N! What brings you here?" he asked, genuinely pleased to see you.
You held up the lunch bag, trying to keep your tone casual. "I brought you lunch. You mentioned you didn’t have much time to get food, so I thought I’d help out."
Hongjoong's eyes sparkled with delight. "That’s so sweet of you."
He took the bag from your hands, his fingers brushing against yours for a brief moment. The customer, now standing awkwardly by the counter, cleared her throat and gave a half-hearted smile before leaving the studio with a curt goodbye.
Hongjoong didn’t seem to notice the customer's departure or the slightly annoyed look on her face. Instead, he turned his full attention to you, completely oblivious to the fact that she had been flirting with him just moments before. Your eyes met his again after watching her leave.
"Was that jealousy I saw on your face just now?" he teased, raising an eyebrow playfully. "You looked like you were ready to storm out."
You felt your cheeks heat up and quickly shook your head. "No, I just... didn’t want to interrupt."
Hongjoong chuckled warmly, his laughter putting you at ease. "Well, I’m glad you did. This looks delicious." He peeked into the bag and smiled appreciatively. "Seriously, thank you."
You shrugged modestly, attempting to hide your nervousness. "It’s nothing. Just thought you could use a good meal."
His expression softened as he stepped closer. "It means a lot. Really. I’ll make sure to savor every bite."
His sincerity touched you deeply, and a warm feeling spread through your chest. "I’m glad," you managed to say, feeling a surge of happiness at his genuine appreciation.
Hongjoong leaned in slightly, his voice softer now. "You always seem to know how to make my day better," he confessed, his gaze earnest.
A flutter of butterflies danced in your stomach at his words. "I’m just happy to help," you replied softly, meeting his eyes with a smile.
He nodded, his smile widening. "Well, I’m grateful for it. And I owe you one."
Before you could respond, he reached out and gently squeezed your hand, his touch lingering for a moment longer than necessary. The simple gesture sent a rush of warmth through you, leaving you both comforted and excited for what might come next.
"I'd love for you to stay," Hongjoong said earnestly, his eyes reflecting a mix of sincerity and hope.
You hesitated, feeling a flutter of nerves despite the warmth his presence brought. "Are you sure? I wouldn't want to intrude..."
Hongjoong shook his head, his smile reassuring. "You wouldn't be intruding at all. I enjoy your company, and I'd love to share this lunch with you."
His sincerity melted away your reservations. "Okay then," you replied softly, smiling back at him.
He led you to a cozy corner of his office where he had already set out the lunch you had brought. You settled into chairs nearby, the familiar buzz of the studio outside muffled by the closed door.
As you both ate, the conversation flowed easily between you. You talked about his latest projects, your shared love for certain bands, and plans for the upcoming weekend. Hongjoong's passion for music shone through as he animatedly described his friend’s upcoming gig.
"You should come," he suggested, his eyes lighting up. "It’s going to be a great show, and I’d love for you to be there."
You considered it for a moment, feeling a surge of excitement at the thought of experiencing another part of Hongjoong’s world. "I'd love to come," you replied warmly. "It sounds like a lot of fun."
His smile widened, a mixture of happiness and anticipation. "Great! I’ll send you the details later. My friends will love you, I’m sure."
As lunch drew to a close, you found yourself reluctant to leave. The afternoon had been unexpectedly intimate and comforting, deepening the bond between you and Hongjoong. You were beginning to see glimpses of how well you fit together, like pieces of a puzzle falling into place.
"I should probably get going," you said, glancing at the time.
Hongjoong nodded, but his eyes held a hint of reluctance. "I understand. Thanks for staying. I always enjoy your company."
You smiled warmly. "Thank you for inviting me. I had a great time."
Walking out of the tattoo shop, you couldn’t help but replay the moments spent with Hongjoong in your mind. Each interaction seemed to reinforce the connection between you, leaving you eager for more shared experiences and conversations. As promised, Hongjoong texted you later with the details of his friend's gig. You replied with enthusiasm, already looking forward to the weekend and the chance to see him again. 
Your heart raced with excitement and a touch of nervousness as you meticulously prepared for your next date with Hongjoong. After several wardrobe changes and a quick touch-up of makeup, you settled on your favorite outfit: a soft, flowy blouse paired with well-fitted jeans. The blouse, a delicate shade of lavender, complemented your complexion, while the jeans, perfectly worn-in, exuded a laid-back vibe. You added a few subtle accessories—a dainty necklace that caught the light just so, and a pair of earrings that added a touch of sparkle.
The anticipation bubbled within you as you imagined the evening ahead. It wasn't just about the outing itself but the chance to see Hongjoong in his element, surrounded by the music and energy that fueled his passion. You wondered what surprises the night might hold, eager to share more moments together and deepen the connection that had been growing steadily between you.
With a final check of your phone for any messages from Hongjoong, you grabbed your keys and headed out the door. Each step carried a mixture of excitement and anticipation, knowing that tonight would be another chapter in your unfolding story with Hongjoong—a story that seemed to promise more laughter, heartfelt conversations, and perhaps even a hint of romance.
When you arrived at the venue, the place was already buzzing with energy. The dim, moody lighting and the low hum of the crowd set the perfect atmosphere for a night of live music. Hongjoong had invited you to his friend's gig, and as you stepped inside, you couldn't help but notice the stark contrast between your outfit and the attire of the other attendees. The room was filled with people dressed in sleek black attire—leather jackets, ripped jeans, and boots. Hongjoong fit right in.
For a moment, self-consciousness crept in as you wondered if you had misjudged the dress code. However, Hongjoong's wide smile and warm hug dispelled any lingering doubts.
"I’m so glad you came," he said, taking your hand. 
You returned his hug, feeling reassured by his warmth. "Wouldn't miss it," you replied with a smile, trying to shake off your initial uncertainty about your outfit choice.
Hongjoong glanced at your outfit, a playful glint in his eyes. "You look amazing," he said sincerely, brushing a stray strand of hair from your face. "I love the pop of color—it stands out in the best way."
His compliment eased your nerves, and you found yourself relaxing in the vibrant atmosphere of the venue. As Hongjoong's friend took the stage, you settled in beside him, enjoying the electrifying energy of the crowd and the raw passion in the music.
As the concert started, the venue's atmosphere crackled with energy. Jongho, the charismatic singer; Mingi and San, the energetic guitarists; Yunho, the cool and composed bassist; and Yeosang, the talented drummer took their positions on stage. Wooyoung, who, despite not seemingly being a part of the band, was just backstage as Hongjoong pointed out to you. If only Seonghwa were here, the entire group would be together—and you were starting to notice why they were so close.
They launched into their first song, filling the air with pulsating rhythms and electrifying melodies. Not only was their music and stage presence impressive, their chemistry with each other was undeniable. The crowd around you danced and cheered, fully immersed in the music and the infectious excitement of the performance.
You stood beside Hongjoong, initially captivated by his enthusiasm and the way he effortlessly moved to the beat. However, as the concert progressed and the crowd grew more animated, you found yourself momentarily separated from him in the sea of bodies. Panic gripped your chest as you scanned the area, searching for his familiar figure amidst the shifting shadows and flashes of colored lights.
The dim lighting and the swirling mass of people seemed to conspire against you, making it difficult to pinpoint his location. Voices merged into a distant roar, blending with the thumping bass and reverberating guitar riffs. You pushed through the crowd, calling out his name in a mix of urgency and concern, your heart pounding in your ears.
Just as your anxiety peaked, a flash of bleach-blonde hair caught your eye in the crowd ahead. Relief flooded through you like a tidal wave as you hurried towards him. Hongjoong turned at the sound of your voice, his face breaking into a wide smile when he saw you approaching.
"Hey! There you are," he exclaimed over the music, reaching out to take you by your waist and pull you in closer.
You let out a shaky breath, feeling the tension drain from your body. "I was looking everywhere for you," you admitted, relieved beyond words to have found him safe and sound.
He chuckled, his eyes bright with amusement and affection. "Sorry about that. Got caught up in the music." He leaned in and spoke softly in your ear.
You couldn't help but smile back, the rush of emotions settling into a warm glow of contentment. "It's okay," you replied. "I'm just glad I found you."
He took your hand again, and this time, he didn’t let go. You moved through the crowd together, finding a spot near the stage where you had a great view of the performance. The band was fantastic, and you quickly realized why Hongjoong was so proud of his friends. Together, you leaned into each other, enjoying the rest of the concert side by side. The music continued to pulse through the air, weaving a tapestry of melodies that seemed to resonate with the newfound closeness between you.
After the set, he led you backstage—an area littered with dirty towels, instruments, gear, and a few empty beer bottles—a grin spreading across his face as he introduced you to everyone. "Guys, this is the person I’ve been telling you about."
They greeted you warmly, but it wasn’t long before the teasing began. Jongho was the first to speak up, a mischievous glint in his eye. "So, you’re the one who’s got Hongjoong all smitten?"
Mingi chuckled, nudging San. "Yeah, you don’t look like his usual type at all."
San nodded a playful smirk on his face. "Looks like our boy Hongjoong has developed a bit of a corruption kink, huh?"
Your cheeks burned with embarrassment, and you glanced at Hongjoong, who was trying to suppress a laugh. "Guys, come on," he said, shaking his head. "Don’t scare them off."
Yeosang joined in, trying to make up for the others’ drunken comments. "We’re just surprised. You look so sweet and innocent compared to his usual taste."
You felt a mix of emotions—embarrassment, amusement, and a strange sort of pride. Despite the teasing, it was clear they cared about Hongjoong and were curious about you. Hongjoong wrapped an arm around you, pulling you close.
"Don’t mind them," he whispered in your ear. "They can be jerks when they’re drunk."
You smiled up at him, feeling more at ease. "It’s okay. I can handle it."
Wooyoung clapped his hands together, grinning. "Alright, enough teasing. Let’s get to the after-party!"
The rest of the evening passed in a blur of laughter, music, and good company. Hongjoong stayed by your side, making sure you felt included and comfortable. As the night drew to a close, you realized how much you enjoyed being a part of his world and seeing him in his element.
When it was time to leave, Hongjoong walked you to the front door, his arm wrapped protectively around you. "Thanks for coming tonight," he said softly.
You smiled, leaning into him. "I had a great time. I like your friends."
He chuckled. "Yeah, they’re a handful, but they’re the best." You stood there for a moment, the night air cool and crisp around you. You wanted to say something else, to question what his friends had said earlier, but you couldn’t bring yourself to do it.
Hongjoong drove you home, the hum of the engine and the cool night air doing little to ease the swirling thoughts in your mind. You couldn’t stop thinking about what Hongjoong’s friends had said. The teasing comments replayed in your head, making you wonder if you really were out of place in his life.
When he pulled up in front of your apartment, you hesitated before speaking. "Hongjoong, would you mind coming inside for a bit?"
He looked at you, concern etched on his face. "Of course. Let’s go."
He parked his motorbike and followed you inside the apartment complex for the first time. You led him up to your apartment, feeling a mix of anxiety and anticipation. As you opened the door and stepped inside, you suddenly felt self-conscious about the cute decor—soft pastel colors, plush cushions, and delicate trinkets that filled the space. It was a stark contrast to the edgy vibe Hongjoong and his friends exuded—the very reason you were feeling so self-conscious.
He took in the surroundings with a smile. "Your place is really nice. It suits you."
You blushed, fidgeting slightly. "Thanks. I just... I know it’s not exactly your style."
Hongjoong stepped closer, his expression was serious yet gentle. "This isn’t about what the guys said, right? I think it’s great. It’s you."
You looked down, feeling a little better but still needing answers. "Well... they made me feel… Am I not your type?"
He sighed, running a hand through his bleached hair. "They were just messing around. I’m sorry if they made you uncomfortable– it’s just that, they know me. They know how I was before you. In the past… I wasn’t always the nicest guy when it came to relationships."
You looked at him, curiosity and concern mixing in your gaze. "What do you mean?"
Hongjoong took a deep breath, looking more vulnerable than you’d ever seen him. "I dated a lot, but I never really cared about anyone, I guess? It was all just fun and games to me.” He took a deep breath and looked at you with an overwhelming sense of worry. “But with you, it’s different. You’re different. I don’t want to mess this up."
You couldn’t help yourself, you had to ask. "Is that why you haven’t... you know... tried anything with me yet?"
He opened and closed his mouth again, unprepared for the question. "I just don’t want to scare you off. I don’t want to pressure you into anything you’re not comfortable with."
“Why would you scare me off?” you asked.
Hongjoong’s face turned red, and he looked down at his feet, shuffling them awkwardly. His usual confident demeanor seemed to vanish, replaced by a shy vulnerability that made your heart skip a beat. The blush creeping up his neck and the way he bit his lower lip were both endearing and unexpected, revealing a side of him you hadn't seen before. The silence stretched between you, charged with unspoken emotions.
Hongjoong took a deep breath, finally lifting his gaze to meet yours. "I'm a bit more... adventurous in bed than most… God, I can’t even explain it." He groaned and shut his eyes tight.
You blinked, processing his words. The vulnerability in his eyes confessed secrets to you that you hadn’t seen before, a part of him he had kept hidden. "You mean, like... more adventurous how?"
He hesitated, clearly trying to find the right words. "I like trying new things, pushing boundaries… I have certain… kinks. I understand if that’s not what you want– I think that’s what the boys were getting at, that you just don’t… you don’t look like the type to enjoy that, which is completely fine and–"
You reached out, taking his hand in yours, and Hongjoong’s rambling quieted down. "I appreciate you being honest with me. I want to understand you better, and… I’m willing to try some things."
His eyes softened. "Are you sure? You’re not just saying that, right? Because if you don’t want to, it’s totally fine– the last thing I want to do is to make you uncomfortable."
You nodded, giving his hand a reassuring squeeze. "I trust you… just go slow? Please?"
Hongjoong pulled you into a gentle hug, holding you close. "We’ll take it slow, I promise."
As you stood there in his arms, the worries and doubts from earlier began to fade away. Your arms wrapped around his torso, and you felt him press a kiss to the top of your head. From the way he was acting now, you couldn’t picture him being as rough as he seemed to be alluding to. Excitement bubbled up in your stomach, surprising yourself.
You pulled back slightly to look up at him, your eyes meeting his. The intensity in his gaze sent a shiver down your spine. Hongjoong cupped your face gently with one hand, his thumb brushing lightly against your cheek. The warmth of his touch made your heart race.
"Can I kiss you?" he asked softly, his voice barely above a whisper.
You nodded, your breath catching in your throat. "Yes."
He leaned in slowly, giving you a chance to back out if you wanted to. But you didn’t. You tilted your head up to meet him halfway, your lips finally touching his. The kiss started out tender and tentative as if he was afraid of breaking the moment. His lips were soft and warm, and you melted into him, feeling the world around you disappear.
As the kiss deepened, his hand moved to the back of your neck, pulling you closer. You could feel his heartbeat against your chest, matching the rhythm of your own. The passion between you grew, the kiss becoming more urgent and fervent. His other hand slid down to your waist, holding you tightly against him.
Time seemed to stand still as you lost yourself in the kiss, the rest of the world fading away. All that mattered was the connection you felt with him, the electricity coursing through your veins. When you finally pulled apart, both of you were breathless, your foreheads resting against each other.
Hongjoong's eyes were dark with desire, his voice a low murmur. "Should we... go to your bedroom?"
You nodded, your heart racing. "Please."
You took his hand, leading him down the hallway to your bedroom. Your heart was racing when you finally reached the door and opened it. The room was dimly lit by the moonlight streaming through the window, casting a gentle glow over the bed.
Hongjoong turned to face you, his expression tender yet intense. He cupped your face in his hands, his thumbs brushing over your cheeks. "Are you sure you're okay with this?"
You smiled, placing your hands over his. "I'm sure."
He kissed you again, this time slower and more deliberate, savoring every moment. You wrapped your arms around his neck, pulling him closer as you backed toward the bed. When the back of your legs hit the mattress, you sat down, bringing him with you—his knees on the bed.
Hongjoong's hands roamed over your body over the thin material of your blouse, exploring with a reverent touch. His fingers traced the curve of your spine, sending shivers through you. He kissed along your jawline, down your neck, his lips leaving a trail of warmth in their wake.
You leaned back onto the bed, pulling him down with you. The softness of the sheets contrasted with the firmness of his body above you. Hongjoong reached his hand to the buttons of your blouse, which he hesitantly unbuttoned—his lips staying on yours. You helped him take off your clothes, leaving you in your underwear. He pulled away from you and paused for a moment, looking down at you with a mixture of affection and desire. The soft lace of your bra and panties practically called out to him, and he delicately traced it with his fingertips.
"You're so beautiful," he whispered.
You felt too naked staring at his clothed body. Once he noticed your nervous stare, he pulled off his shirt and shuffled out of his pants. You could see the outline of his cock through his underwear, and you found yourself clenching around nothing at the sight. He smiled, then leaned down to capture your lips once more. The kiss deepened, and you lost yourself in the sensation of his touch, the taste of his lips, the warmth of his body against yours.
“Is it okay if I take this off?” he murmured against your lips, breathless, as he played with the hem of your bra. As soon as you nodded, he unclasped it and let it fall off your shoulders. His lips immediately met your delicate skin, pressing soft kisses before marking your most sensitive areas.
“Hongjoong–” Your breath hitched in your throat as his tongue swirled around your nipple.  
He paused, immediately looking at your face to make sure you were okay. When he saw your swollen lips and big eyes he smiled—unlike the sweet smile you’d seen so many times before, this time he almost looked wicked. Your heart skipped a beat at the sight.
“Is it okay if I tie your hands up, baby?” he asked gently.
Your eyebrows furrowed. “Tie my hands up?” 
“Yes.” He leaned back up and pressed a kiss to your jawline. “Against the headboard. I want to have you writhing underneath me.”
You nodded and whispered a yes when you saw Hongjoong’s stern gaze. While he picked his belt up from the floor, you moved over to the headboard. Without him saying a word, you put your hands up, putting your wrists near one of the railings of the headboard. You knew you had done the right thing when Hongjoong looked at you with a proud smile, and you pressed your legs together at the feeling it gave you.
“You’re so obedient,” he murmured as he went to tie your hands to the headboard. “It’s cute.”
Hongjoong carefully made handcuffs out of his belt and tied your wrists to the headboard. You couldn’t move your arms, but the belt was tied loosely enough for it to still be somewhat comfortable. He put two fingers between your wrist and the leather to make sure it wasn’t too tight. You could probably get yourself out, but you didn’t want to. Hongjoong stepped back to look at you, the wicked smile back on his lips. He got between your legs without another word, pressing his thumb against your clit over the soft material of your panties. You tried to close your legs, but he held them apart.
“Are you doing okay so far, baby?” he asked as he caressed your hips and looked at you with his familiar gentle eyes. You nodded. “Use your words, sweetheart.”
“I’m okay,” you murmured.
“Good.” He looked back down at your cunt, noticing the wet patch growing on your underwear. “I’ll keep your hands tied until I’ve made you cum twice… don’t cum without my permission.”
It was clear that he had thought about this before, and the thought of him lying awake at night picturing you in such a lewd position made you throb with need. You’d never noticed this side of you—a depraved part that you had apparently been keeping under lock and key. Hongjoong just had the talent of luring it out of you. When he looked back up at you again, his eyes were ever so slightly softer.
“If you want me to stop, just tell me and I’ll stop immediately. No matter what. Okay, baby?”
“Yes, sir.” The title just came out of your mouth, you didn’t even process it.
Hongjoong didn’t say anything about it, but you could see in his eyes that he liked it—you did well. He laid down between your legs, wrapping his arms around your thighs to keep them open. Before you could say another word, he pressed his tongue flat over your clothed pussy. You gasped at the sudden warmth, your arms straining against the restraints. Hongjoong groaned at the taste, and you watched his eyes roll into the back of his head as he pressed his nose against your core. Your heart was beating a mile a minute; you’d never seen someone react to you this way. With soft motions—too soft—Hongjoong began rubbing your clit over your panties. It was too slow and you could barely feel anything, your hips desperately bucking up to get more friction. From the look on Hongjoong’s face, this was apparently the point. He wanted to break you, just a little before you got what you wanted. He studied your expression, the way your eyes shut tight and eyebrows furrowed whenever he pushed down a little harder. 
“Please,” you whimpered.
“Please what?”
“Take them off,” you begged, “I want to feel you.”
It was all it took for him to rid you of your panties, and you dutifully lifted up your hips to help him. Only a few seconds later, his tongue was on your cunt again—lavishing in how wet you had gotten from just a bit of teasing. It didn’t take long for your orgasm to build up. Your moans grew louder, your legs started shaking, and you pulled more and more on your restraints. Hongjoong kept studying you, keeping his eyes open and focused while eating you out. He stopped before you reached the edge.
“Why?” you whined.
“I told you not to cum without my permission,” he stated, matter-of-fact.
You whined and wiggled your hips. Hongjoong pushed them down with one of his hands, the other one caressing your side soothingly. “As long as you do as I say, you’ll feel good, baby.”
You nodded pathetically— whimpering out another “yes, sir,” which had the same effect on him as it did before. It was all he needed to dive back into your core. His tongue expertly lapped at your pussy, his eyes now closed in pleasure. As his tongue started prodding at your hole, his tongue bumping against your clit, you started grinding on his face. It wasn’t like you meant to do it, it just felt too good. With a stern arm, Hongjoong held you down. You wanted to do something—anything—your orgasm was building up in your stomach once again and you needed to move. You wanted to push your legs together at the overwhelming feeling, pull his head closer to you by his hair, and keep grinding against him all at once. Hongjoong was restricting all of your movements.
“Please, let me cum!” you all but shouted.
“Do it.” Hongjoong’s demand was simple. A low growl that you barely heard over the sound of your own wet pussy, but it had you unraveling there and then.
The sound of you pulling on your restraints was drowned out by your own moans as the coil in your stomach snapped. Hongjoong moaned against your core, the vibrations making your legs shake. You heard yourself murmur a “thank you, sir,” as Hongjoong helped you come down from your high by letting you rub against his palm.
“You’re doing so good,” he praised. “Just one more before I free your hands, alright?”
You hummed. Hongjoong slapped the inside of your thigh, the stinging sensation made you gasp. You looked at him with wide eyes, only to be met with a grin.
“I shouldn’t have to tell you to use your words again, should I, baby?”
You shook your head, and then quickly added, “No, sir.” Hongjoong rubbed a soothing hand over the area where he had slapped you, and you melted into the touch. The feeling quickly disappeared, however, as his fingers reached for your core again. Your head became clouded as his fingers prodded at your entrance. Just one more, you repeated in your head. You wondered if he’d let you have his cock tonight—almost worried about it—and you let out a low whine. Hongjoong looked at you with concern.
“Are you going to… you know…” You looked at his arm, at the tattoos sneaking down to his hand which was still toying with your core. “Fuck me?”
Hongjoong’s hand faltered at your vulgar words, a smile broke out on his face. “Thought I’d save it for when you can touch me.”
There will be more? Your head was spinning at the thought. You were used to cumming once on your vibrator before going to sleep, too tired to go on by yourself. Cumming three times in a row wasn’t something you’d done in a while—if ever. If you had, you couldn’t remember.
“Tell me to stop if it’s too much,” he reminded you as his middle finger entered you.
After pumping the finger inside you for a while, he added another. He put his palm against your clit and let you grind against it while he kept thrusting his fingers into you—curling them against your g-spot, once he’d found it. While you were busy shutting your eyes tight at the stimulation, Hongjoong leaned up and captured one of your nipples in his mouth again. You gasped at the feeling—it was almost overwhelming. All of these sensations, and the promise of getting to have his cock inside you, were making you get closer and closer to the edge.
“Are you going to cum again, baby?” he coos at you, whispering in your ear, “I can feel you clenching around me.”
You let out a gasp that turned into a moan, as he started sucking on the sensitive spot right by your jaw. After managing to whimper out a confirmation, he ordered you to cum again. It was all you needed to release all over his hand. Your moans were drowned out by his lips on your again. His fingers slowed down, but he kept his hands between your legs until your movements stopped. Without another word, Hongjoong licked his fingers clean and helped you out of your restraints. As soon as you were free, you wrapped your arms around his neck. Your head lay on his chest, and Hongjoong welcomed you into his embrace.
“Are you okay to keep going, baby?” he asked softly.
You were practically buzzing with anticipation. “Please.”
When Hongjoong asked if you had a condom, your heart dropped to your stomach. You hadn’t been sleeping with anyone for a while, of course, you didn’t have condoms anywhere.
“... no,” you muttered. “I’m on the pill. Are you clean?”
“Checked it a few months ago. I’m clean,” he murmured. 
You looked up at him with pleading eyes. “Then, please, just fuck me?”
How could he say no to you? He smiled, pressing an unfittingly chaste kiss on your lips. After he moved to sit by your legs again, he quickly manhandled you onto your hands and knees. Your fuzzy brain didn’t even have time to process what he was doing before it was done.
“But I can’t touch you like this!” you whined.
“Mm… I lied.” You could hear the grin in his voice. “Cum one more time and I’ll let you touch me. Just one more.”
You wanted to whine and complain, but the proud look on his face appeared in your mind. You wanted to please him, you couldn’t deny that. So, you shut your mouth and arch your back—pressing your ass against him. You can feel that he’s pulled off his underwear now, and you ached to see him. All of him. Your mouth all but watered at the thought.
“Please, fuck me,” you said again. “Please, sir.”
He groaned at the feeling of your wet pussy rubbing up against him, and quickly guided his cock to your entrance. He goes slowly at first, letting you get used to his size. However, you grow impatient and start moving yourself further down his cock. Hongjoong gripped your hips—his warm hands feel like they belong there—and stopped you from moving.
“I’m in charge here, sweetheart,” he reminded you. “Want me to go faster? Beg.”
“Please fuck me faster, sir, I want you to fill me up.” The words come pouring out of you without stop, you become a blubbering mess as he starts shallowly fucking into you at a faster pace. “Yes! Please, more! I need more!”
You can’t think of anything except how good he’s filling you up. You’re not sure you’ve ever lost yourself in someone this way—no one has ever taken control over you like this, fucked you like this, molded you to their body like this. He’s ruined everyone else for you, you’re sure of it. His hips slam against yours, filling you up completely. You open your mouth to thank him, but only a noise of surprise and pleasure comes out. Hongjoong’s hand had come down on your ass, leaving a stinging sensation on your skin.
“Again,” you whimper.
His hand comes down on you again, and you moan. You never knew you were into pain like this—but whatever he was doing, he was not allowed to stop. Hongjoong’s hips started moving against yours again, and his hand came down on you with every other thrust. You were a drooling mess. The makeup you had put on was running down your cheeks as you babbled out an endless sentence of thank you. 
“You’re mine,” he growled. “So good, taking whatever I give you—aren’t you such a good obedient slut?”
“Yes, sir! I’m your obedient slut!” you moaned out, your hands gripping the sheets. “Please, let me cum! Please, please, please…”
“Cum for me, cum all over my cock,” he demanded.
With a choked moan, the coil in your stomach exploded into a fiery pit—burning your skin until it made you see stars. Hongjoong pulled out and came on your back, groaning as he did. You collapsed on the bed, and you felt the bed tip to one side. He had gotten some tissues from the box on your nightstand and wiped off the cum from your back. You turned around to see him throwing the tissue to the side, holding your arms out to him. His chest pressed against yours as he embraced you, pressing a gentle kiss to your lips. The dominant Hongjoong was gone, you could tell from his soft kiss. There was still a craving lingering in you. Although you were tired, you started grinding against his still-hard cock. He put his hand on your hip, right by your tattoo.
“Baby, you’re too tired,” he murmured.
“You said I could touch you if I came again,” you whined.
Your brain was foggy, all you needed and wanted was for him to touch you—to fuck you slowly into your mattress. He smiled at your pout, before leaning in to kiss it away. You smiled back at him, and Hongjoong strangled a laugh at the sight of you.
“Just one more?” you asked.
He groaned as you reached down to guide his cock to your entrance again. “Tell me if it’s too much, okay?”
“Okay.”
He started to slowly thrust into you again. Hissing at how sensitive you both were, you paused all movement as he had bottomed out in you. Hongjoong’s arms were on either side of your head, holding himself up to look at you. You reached out your finger and carefully traced the tattoos on his chest.
“You’re pretty,” you murmured.
It was dark in your room, but you swore you could see his face get red. Hongjoong didn’t respond, he only started moving slowly against you again. You let out small grunts and whimpers, your hands finding their place on his shoulders to keep yourself steady.
“You feel so good…” Hongjoong’s head fell to the crook of your neck, and you wrapped your arms around his shoulders to hold him there.
One of your hands found its way to his short hair, tangling your fingers into the mess. Your legs wrapped around his waist, desperate to keep him close. His body was warm, and you wanted to steal that warmth to keep it safe.
“You’re incredible,” he whispered in your ear before pressing a kiss to your cheek. “So good to me…”
“Hongjoong.” You made him look at you again, his hips never stopped moving. His forehead leaned against yours as he stared deep into your eyes. “Cum inside me.”
He didn’t respond, but you knew he’d keep you to your word from the way that he kissed you. It was as if he was pouring his adoration into every move of his lips. One of his hands moved down to rub your clit, making your legs shake around him. With a grunt, he came inside you and you came soon after him. The two of you stayed in that position, chests heaving.
“You’re amazing,” you breathed out.
“I could say the same about you.” He grinned before pressing a kiss to your cheek and getting up. “I’ll get you cleaned up, stay here.”
He walked over to the door but hesitated as he realized that he didn’t know the layout of your apartment. “The bathroom’s to your left when you walk out of that door.” You giggled. 
He walked out with a sheepish smile, his ears red, and came back only a few seconds later with a warm, wet washcloth. Hongjoong wiped you off carefully as if he was wiping off porcelain. You reached your hand up to his head, trying to tame his wild hair by running your fingers through it.
“Does it look weird?” he asked without looking up at you, his focus was on your tattoo—he traced the lines of the lotus flower with his fingers.
“It’s just messy…” you hummed. “... maybe a little weird.” He looked away from your tattoo, and the two of you laughed as your eyes met. 
After cleaning you up and helping you to the bathroom, Hongjoong got you under the covers in your bed before he got in next to you. Lying together, you nestled against Hongjoong’s chest, his arms wrapped securely around you. The steady rhythm of his heartbeat soothed any lingering nerves, its gentle thump a comforting backdrop to the stillness of the night. He stroked your hair tenderly, his fingers moving in a slow, relaxing pattern that made your eyelids grow heavy with contentment.
“This feels nice,” you murmured, your voice thick with drowsiness.
He tightened his embrace slightly, resting his chin on top of your head. “It really does… I’m glad you invited me up.”
You tilted your head up to look at him, your eyes meeting his in the soft, dim light from the street lights and passing cars filtering through the curtains. The tenderness in his gaze made your heart swell. “Me too.”
He smiled softly, leaning down to kiss your forehead. “Was it okay? You’re not overwhelmed or anything?”
“I’m fine, Hongjoong,” you murmured.
“I just want to make sure—”
“I know.” You smiled, feeling the warmth spread through your chest. “It’s sweet… but I’m okay… I liked it, actually.”
“Good.” He couldn’t hide his boyish grin. “Are you sure you haven’t done it before? You were too good for—”
You slapped his chest lightly, biting back your smile at his teasing. “Stop it.”
“Sorry, sorry.” He snickered, his laughter a low, pleasant rumble against your ear. “Seriously though, you were amazing.”
“So were you.” You sighed happily, snuggling closer. The warmth of his body and the security of his arms around you made you feel incredibly safe. As you lay there, you felt a profound sense of peace, the worries of the world melting away. Hongjoon’s hand found the lotus flower design on your hip again. Moving his body ever so slightly, he looked at the inked skin under the sheets, carefully studying his work. His fingers continued to trace the intricate design of your tattoo, the gentle touch sending shivers down your spine.
“It healed well,” he commented.
“It did.” You hummed, cupping his face in your hand to make him meet your eyes. His eyebrows raised and he looked at you with big eyes, silently asking if you were okay. You nodded and he smiled, leaning up to press a kiss on your swollen lips.
“I thought the design was pretty on its own.” He pressed a kiss on your cheek. “But it’s even prettier on you.”
“Smooth-talker.” You scoffed but smiled lovingly anyway.
He leaned his forehead against yours. “I’m just telling the truth,” he said with a playful smile. Hongjoong wrapped his arms around you again while you rolled your eyes.
“Goodnight,” you whispered.
“Goodnight, baby,” he replied, his voice a gentle murmur in the darkness.
The two of you drifted off to sleep, wrapped in each other’s arms. His hand stayed on your hip.
You woke to the gentle caress of morning light streaming through your curtains. The first thing you noticed was Hongjoong lying beside you, his presence as comforting as the warmth of the sun on your skin. His hair, a tousled mess of soft blond strands, framed his peaceful face, and you couldn’t help but smile at the sight. He looked so serene, his chest rising and falling in a steady rhythm, completely at ease in his slumber.
As you lay there, your heart swelled with a sense of contentment, the kind that only comes from waking up next to someone you love. Carefully, you reached out, your fingers gently threading through his bleached hair, feeling its softness against your skin. He stirred slightly at your touch, his nose twitching in response, and a soft hum escaped his lips. Instinctively, he tightened his arms around you, pulling you closer as if even in his sleep, he couldn’t bear to be apart from you.
You watched him for a moment longer, memorizing the way the morning light kissed his features, casting delicate shadows on his skin. The peaceful expression on his face, the way his eyelashes brushed against his cheeks, the gentle curve of his lips—it all filled you with a warmth that radiated from deep within, spreading through every part of you.
Careful not to wake him, you slipped out of his embrace and out of bed. After putting on clothes, you padded to the kitchen to start breakfast. The sounds and smells of cooking soon filled the apartment, and just as you were finishing up, you felt a pair of arms wrap around your waist.
"Good morning," Hongjoong mumbled, his voice still thick with sleep.
You turned your head to look at him, his hair even more disheveled now. "Good morning. I hope you like your eggs scrambled."
He grinned, planting a kiss on your cheek. "I love them. Especially if you're the one making them."
The two of you moved around the kitchen in a cozy, intimate dance, making breakfast together. There was a comforting rhythm to it, an easy familiarity that made you feel like you’d been doing this for years. You chatted about small things, laughed at silly jokes, and stole kisses in between setting the table and making coffee.
Once everything was ready, you sat down to eat. The conversation flowed effortlessly, and you felt a deep sense of contentment. After breakfast, Hongjoong insisted on helping you clean up, and soon it was time to get ready for work. As you gathered your things, he offered to drop you off, and you happily agreed.
When you arrived at the café, you saw Seonghwa already seated at a table near the window. He ate breakfast at the café from time to time, mostly when he missed you or when he didn’t have the energy to make breakfast at home. He glanced up and saw you through the big windows as you walked up to the café, a curious look in his eyes. 
Hongjoong walked you to the door, his hand lingering on the small of your back. "Have a good day at work," he said softly, leaning in for a quick kiss.
You blushed, aware of the eyes on you. "You too. Thanks for breakfast and everything."
As you stepped inside, Seonghwa immediately waved you over. "Hey, you look... different today. Did something happen?"
You shrugged, trying to keep your expression neutral but unable to hide the small smile playing on your lips. "Just had a good morning, that’s all."
Your coworker joined in, smirking. "Uh-huh, sure. And was that Hongjoong who just dropped you off?"
You felt your cheeks heat up again. "Maybe..."
Seonghwa raised an eyebrow. "What did he do to make you glow like that this early in the morning, huh?"
You laughed, shaking your head. "... he may have spent the night after we saw the gig that his friends were playing. But I’m not saying anything else. You would’ve known if you had been there!"
“I was busy with work,” he whined. “You have to tell me!”
“I don’t remember putting that in our contract,” you joked. “Now, leave me alone! I have a shift to get to!”
With that, you slipped behind the counter, ready to start your shift. Despite the teasing and the curious glances, you couldn’t help but feel light and happy. The memory of the morning with Hongjoong stayed with you, a warm, comforting presence that made the day feel just a little bit brighter.
✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦
Over the next few weeks, you saw Hongjoong regularly. Your connection deepened with each meeting, but despite the growing intimacy between you, he never initiated anything sexual. It was both endearing and frustrating. You appreciated his respect for your boundaries, but it also made you shy and hesitant to make the first move.
One afternoon, while you were tidying up at the café, your phone buzzed with a message from Hongjoong.
Hey, can you stop by the shop after work? I have something I want to show you.
Your heart skipped a beat as you read the message. You quickly typed back, Sure! I get off at 5. See you then!
The rest of your shift passed in a blur of anticipation. As soon as the clock struck five, you grabbed your things and headed to his studio. The familiar walk seemed shorter than usual, your excitement propelling you forward.
When you arrived, the shop was quiet, a stark contrast to its usual buzz of activity. You stepped inside, greeted by the faint hum of a tattoo machine and the scent of ink and antiseptic. Hongjoong looked out from his tattoo room and smiled, his eyes lighting up when he saw you.
"Hey," he greeted, finishing up the last touches on his current project. "Just give me a minute, and I’ll be right with you."
You nodded, taking a seat and watching him work. His focus and skill never ceased to amaze you. There was something mesmerizing about the way he moved, his hands steady and precise.
After a few minutes, he finished and cleaned up, then came over to you. "Thanks for waiting. I’m really glad you could come by."
"No problem," you replied, your curiosity piqued. "So, what did you want to show me?"
Hongjoong grinned, a mischievous glint in his eye. "Follow me."
He led you to a back room you hadn’t seen before. Inside was a collection of his artwork, framed and displayed on the walls. Sketches, paintings, and tattoo designs filled the space, each piece a testament to his talent and creativity.
"Wow, Hongjoong," you breathed, taking it all in. "This is incredible. I knew you worked a lot but, this…"
He scratched the back of his head, looking a bit sheepish. "Yeah, it’s kind of my personal gallery. I wanted to share it with you."
You turned to him, touched by the gesture. "Your work is amazing."
He stepped closer, his expression softening. "I wanted you to see this because... well, you’re important to me. And I want you to know me better, all sides of me."
Your heart swelled at his words, and you reached out, taking his hand. "Thank you for showing me this."
He squeezed your hand gently, his eyes locked onto yours. The moment stretched, filled with unspoken feelings and mutual understanding. You felt the urge to close the distance between you, but still, the hesitation lingered.
Sensing your uncertainty, Hongjoong smiled and pulled you into a warm embrace. You lost yourself in the domesticity of the moment, feeling content in his arms. "How was your day?" he murmured.
"Good," you replied, smiling up at him. "How about you?"
"Busy, but good," he said, pulling away from him. "Listen, I was wondering if you’re free for dinner tonight. I’d like to cook for you, as a thank you for the breakfast from a few weeks ago."
Your heart skipped a beat. The idea of Hongjoong cooking for you in an intimate setting set loose the butterflies in your stomach. "I’d love that."
He grinned. "Great! Let me just lock up, and we’ll head over to my place."
As he closed up the shop, you couldn’t help but feel a flutter of anticipation. You assumed that inviting you over for dinner meant he might finally make a move, and the thought both thrilled and made you slightly nervous.
The ride to his apartment was a little longer than it had been to your place, and you started to understand why he had bought a motorbike instead of a car. While the cars were stuck slowly rolling forward during rush hour, Hongjoong easily passed them in between the lanes. When you arrived, he led you inside, and you took a moment to take in your surroundings. His place was cozy and stylish, with a mix of modern and vintage decor that reflected his artistic nature—most of it in black.
"Make yourself at home," he said, gesturing to the living room. "I’ll get started on dinner."
You settled onto the couch, watching him move around the kitchen with practiced ease. The aroma of garlic and herbs soon filled the air, and you felt that warm sense of domestic bliss wash over you yet again.
"Can I help with anything?" you offered, not wanting to just sit idly by.
He shook his head, smiling. "Nope, I’ve got it covered. Just relax and enjoy."
You chatted as he cooked, the conversation flowing effortlessly. It felt so natural, so right, to be there with him. Before long, he called you to the table, which he had set beautifully with candles and your favorite flowers.
"Dinner is served," he said with a flourish, placing a delicious-looking pasta dish in front of you.
You laughed, feeling a bit like you were in a romantic movie. "This looks amazing. Thank you, Hongjoong."
He walked back to the kitchen with a pleased smile on his face. "I’m glad you like it."
Hongjoong came back with a bottle of wine and two glasses. You watched him with heart eyes as he opened the bottle, practically drooling over how his hands looked—and either he just didn’t notice, or he decided to ignore it, but he didn’t comment on your staring. He sat down in front of you and poured you a glass.
“You always call me ‘Hongjoong,’” he said.
“Hm?” You looked up at him from your glass of wine. “It’s your name.”
“I know, I know…” For the first time since you’d met him, he was getting shy. “I think it’d be nice if you started… I don’t know, forget about it.”
“What? Do you like pet names?” you asked with a hint of amusement in your voice. When you saw him nodding, your heart all but soared. You hadn’t expected someone like him to like cute, couple nicknames—maybe you should’ve guessed it from the number of times he called you sweetheart, baby, or love. “Like ‘baby?’ ‘Sweetie?’ ‘Pumpkin?’ ‘Sugar-cube?’”
“Now you’re just teasing me.” He groaned, but let out a laugh soon after. 
“Sorry, I couldn’t help it,” you admit with a giggle and start eating. “Could you pass me the salt, baby?”
Hongjoong’s grin grew wider, just at the cusp of letting out an adorable giggle, and he handed you the salt.
As you ate, you couldn’t shake the feeling that tonight was special. The food was delicious, the atmosphere perfect, and the company even better. Every now and then, your eyes would meet, and the unspoken connection between you seemed to grow stronger with each passing moment. Despite the pleasant ambiance, restlessness gnawed at you, making it difficult to focus on the meal. You twirled your fork absentmindedly, dropping subtle hints and playful comments, hoping Hongjoong would pick up on your mood.
He looked up from his plate, eyebrow quirked in amusement. "What's gotten into you tonight?" he asked, his voice laced with curiosity and a hint of teasing.
You chuckled nervously, trying to brush off his question. "Oh, nothing," you replied, avoiding his gaze as you took a sip of water.
Hongjoong leaned closer, a mischievous glint in his eyes—as if he was ready to get you back for teasing him before. "Come on," he urged, reaching across the table to gently touch your hand. "Tell me what you're up to. You're acting strange."
Your heart skipped a beat at his touch, and you struggled to maintain composure. Looking into his eyes, you found it hard to resist his playful charm. "Okay, fine," you finally admitted, your voice quieter than intended. "I've just been thinking... about us."
A flicker of concern crossed Hongjoong's face, and he squeezed your hand gently. "About us?" he prompted softly.
You nodded, feeling the weight of your confession. "Yeah," you began slowly, choosing your words carefully. "I miss... I miss how it felt when you touched me."
Hongjoong's expression softened, and he pulled his hand back, his thumb absently tracing circles on the tablecloth. "I miss that too," he admitted quietly, his eyes meeting yours with a mixture of longing and affection.
The honesty in his voice made your heart swell with warmth. "I didn't realize how much until tonight," you confessed, your voice barely above a whisper. "I've been trying to ignore it, but... I can't."
There was a moment of silence between you, filled only with the soft hum of traffic outside. Hongjoong broke the quiet, his voice low and sincere. "I'm glad you told me," he said softly, reaching across the table again to take your hand in his. "Because I've been feeling the same way… I just didn’t want you to feel pressured into doing anything."
“I want you,” you admitted in a small voice. 
After your quiet admission, Hongjoong's eyes softened, his grip on your hand tightening slightly in reassurance. He leaned in closer, his voice barely above a whisper. "I've been wanting to hear you say that for so long," he confessed, his eyes searching for any hesitation.
After your quiet admission, a warm flush spread through you as Hongjoong’s gaze deepened with a mixture of affection and desire. His hand squeezed yours one last time before he let go, leaning back in his chair with a soft, contemplative smile. You were left stunned—how much more clear did you have to be for him to touch you again?
However, as the meal continued, the air between you was charged with a newfound intensity. You could barely focus on the food, each glance exchanged with Hongjoong sending a shiver down your spine. The unspoken tension only grew as the minutes passed, and it became clear that the two of you were in sync, your thoughts mirroring each other’s.
Finally, after what felt like an eternity, Hongjoong put down his fork and began gathering the dishes. "I’ll take care of this," he said, his tone casual but his eyes betraying a smoldering undercurrent of emotion. He rose from the table, heading toward the kitchen with a stack of plates balanced effortlessly in his hands.
You watched him go, your heart pounding in your chest. Restlessness gnawed at you once more, and before you could overthink it, you found yourself rising from your seat, following him into the kitchen.
As you stepped through the doorway, you found Hongjoong standing at the sink, rinsing the dishes with deliberate care. The sound of running water filled the space, but it did little to drown out the thudding of your heart. You approached him quietly, the warmth of the dimly lit kitchen wrapping around you like a comforting embrace.
Without a word, you slipped your arms around his waist from behind, pressing your cheek against his back. He froze for a moment, the dish in his hand forgotten as he registered your touch. Slowly, he turned off the faucet and set the dish aside, his body relaxing into your embrace.
"Couldn't stay away, huh?" he teased gently, his voice laced with affection as he turned to face you, a playful smile tugging at the corners of his lips.
You looked up at him, your arms still wrapped around his waist and shook your head. "Not for long," you admitted, a small smile playing on your lips.
Hongjoong’s eyes darkened with an intensity that made your breath hitch. He cupped your face in his hands, his touch firm yet tender. "You know, you’ve been driving me crazy all night," he murmured, his voice husky with desire.
Before you could respond, he dipped his head, capturing your lips in a slow, deliberate kiss. It was a kiss that held all the unspoken longing, the unexpressed emotions that had been building between you throughout the evening. Your hands slid up his back, fingers tangling in his hair as you melted into him, the world around you fading away until there was nothing but the two of you.
Hongjoong deepened the kiss, his hands traveling from your face to your waist, pulling you closer until your bodies were flush against each other. The heat between you was palpable, the kiss growing more urgent with every passing second.
Without breaking the kiss, he lifted you effortlessly onto the kitchen counter, your legs instinctively wrapping around his waist as you pulled him closer. The cool surface of the counter was a stark contrast to the heat coursing through your veins, but it only heightened your awareness of every touch, every sensation.
Hongjoong’s hands roamed your body with a gentle urgency, one hand sliding up your back while the other cradled your neck, angling your head to deepen the kiss even further. His lips were relentless, moving from your mouth to your jaw, down to the sensitive skin of your neck, leaving a trail of warmth in their wake. You gasped softly, your fingers gripping his shirt as you arched into him, lost in the sensation of his lips against your skin.
"God, I’ve wanted this," he murmured against your neck, his voice rough with desire as he continued to press kisses along your collarbone. "You have no idea."
You pulled his face back up to yours, capturing his lips in a heated kiss. The tension that had been building between you all evening finally found its release, each kiss, each touch igniting a fire that burned hotter with every second.
Hongjoong’s hands slid beneath your shirt, his touch sending shivers down your spine as he explored your skin with a tenderness that only fueled your desire. Your breath came in shallow gasps as you clung to him, your senses overwhelmed by the intensity of the moment.
But then, just as the kiss had deepened, Hongjoong suddenly slowed, his lips lingering on yours with a gentler, almost reverent touch. He pulled back just enough to meet your gaze, his forehead resting against yours. The air between you was thick, both of you breathing heavily as you took in the weight of what was happening.
His thumb gently caressed your cheek, his eyes searching yours with a mix of longing and tenderness. "I don’t want to rush this," he murmured softly. "I want it to be perfect."
You smiled softly, your heart swelling at the sincerity in his voice. "Me too," you whispered back, your fingers tracing the line of his jaw. There was a pause, a shared moment of understanding, where the intensity of the moment gave way to something deeper, something more meaningful.
Hongjoong’s lips curved into a gentle smile as he kissed your forehead, his breath warm against your skin. "How about we go somewhere more private?" he suggested, his thumb gently stroking the back of your hand, the simple touch grounding you both in the gravity of the moment.
You nodded, feeling a sense of relief and excitement wash over you. "Okay," you agreed quietly, your heart pounding with a mix of nervousness and eagerness. The urgency was still there, simmering just beneath the surface, but now it was tempered with the knowledge that this moment was about more than just passion—it was about connection.
You walked in comfortable silence, the weight of your shared confession hanging in the air like a promise. Reaching his bedroom, he opened the door for you, and you stepped inside, the familiar surroundings feeling suddenly new and charged with possibility. Hongjoong closed the door behind you, and you turned to face him, your eyes meeting his with a mix of uncertainty and desire.
He took a step closer, his hands gently cupping your face. "I want to make sure this is what you really want," he said softly, his gaze intense and sincere.
You nodded, your hands resting on his chest. "I've never been more sure," you replied, a teasing smile spreading on your lips. “Take me however you want, sir.”
With a newfound hunger, Hongjoong leaned in, his lips meeting yours in a passionate kiss. It felt like he was pouring his energy into you, every touch feeling like an electric spark.
Hongjoong pulled back from the kiss, his breath warm against your lips. He searched your eyes, his expression earnest and caring. "Are you sure you’re okay with going further?" he asked softly, his voice filled with a mix of desire and concern.
You felt a shiver run down your spine at his words, the anticipation building inside you. You nodded your voice barely a whisper. "Yes, I trust you."
A slow, satisfied smile spread across his face. "Good," he murmured, his hands sliding down your arms to your waist, pulling you closer. "I promise I'll take care of you."
His lips captured yours again, this time with more urgency, his hands exploring your body. You melted into his embrace, the world outside disappearing as you focused entirely on the sensations he was awakening within you.
He gently pushed you onto the bed, his eyes dark with desire as he stood over you. "I want you to let go, to feel everything," he said, his voice low and commanding. "Can you do that for me?"
You nodded, your pulse quickening at the authority in his tone. "Yes," you breathed, your body aching for his touch.
Hongjoong's smile deepened, and he leaned down, his lips brushing against your ear. "Good girl," he whispered, his words sending a jolt through you. He took his time undressing you, his hands and mouth leaving a trail of heat in their wake. Every touch, every kiss was deliberate, heightening your anticipation.
It was only when you stood completely naked in front of him that he allowed himself to let go of you. He looked you up and down, and you felt the sudden urge to cover yourself—but when your hands reached up to cover your chest, he immediately took your wrists to keep them away.
“I told you before,” he murmured, “you’re beautiful. Don’t hide from me.”
You let out a shaky breath. “What are you going to do with me?”
“You’ll find out.”
He left your side and walked over to one of the closets. Inside the closet were no clothes. The drawers were filled with different toys—some things that you had never seen before—from dildos to restraints. Your jaw practically fell to the floor, and you could hear Hongjoong try to stifle a laugh.
“Do you still want to go further?” he asked, although it was clear that he knew he didn’t have to.
You could only nod, your eyes wide with suspense. 
“Sweetheart,” he warned.
“Yes.”
At one single word, you ended up on the bed with a blindfold on and your hands tied up behind you. Your knees were resting on the unsteady, plush mattress, and you were trying your hardest to stay upright. Despite not being able to see him, you knew that Hongjoong was still dressed—and it made your skin burn.
"You're doing so well," he murmured against your ear, his voice laced with both command and praise. The words sent shivers down your spine. 
Something soft, barely noticeable, tickled your chest. You heard Hongjoong laugh as you tried to squirm away. “Remember, baby, you can’t fall over. You promised me you wouldn’t. Liars get punished, you know?”
Gritting your teeth, you unsuccessfully tried to suppress another whine. You buried your knees into the mattress while Hongjoong kept teasing you, with what you could only assume was some sort of feather. The feather’s touch went from your clavicle to your chest, down your stomach, and to your spread thighs. 
Just as you started getting used to the feather’s touch, it disappeared from your skin. The bed tipped to your right, and you had to use every fiber in your being to not fall over. Hongjoong’s chest pressed against your shoulder, you could feel the soft fabric of his shirt. The urge to wrap your arms around his strong shoulders was irresistible. But no matter how much you pulled on the fuzzy handcuffs, they wouldn’t budge.
“I have a surprise for you,” he whispered in your ear.
“What is it?” you murmured.
“Patience…”
He moved around, and you could feel him right in front of you now. Pressing a few soft kisses to your clavicle, Hongjoong took his time loving you. The sweet kisses turned hungry when he began sucking and grazing his teeth against your skin. You soughed, leaning your head back and to the side to allow him more access. His lips disappeared and the bed dipped slightly to the side. Hongjoong had reached for something that he had put beside the bed earlier, and you were eagerly awaiting your surprise.
A burning sensation, like stepping under the shower before the water has heated up fully, pressed against your chest—the small point encapsulated by Hongjoong’s pillowy lips. A gasp escaped your lips, and you struggled against the restraints by mere intuition. Despite telling you to keep yourself upright, Hongjoong put his hands on your back to keep you still. The ice cube in his mouth ran over your warm skin, and he hummed as you let out a shaky moan.
“Baby, please.” You squirmed.
Hongjoong replied by humming again, but the ice cube stopped gliding over your skin. One of his hands fell on your jaw, guiding you to his lips. The piece of ice, now barely a slither, melted between your tongues as you kissed—a sense of euphoria that you never thought you’d experience.
Hongjoong pulled away, and your lips tried to chase him but he was no longer in front of you. Before you could register that he had climbed off the bed, you had fallen against the soft mattress—your ass up in the air, and your hands struggling on your back. You heard Hongjoong tsk beside you, and a harsh slap landed on your ass. His warm palm rubbed soothing circles over the stinging skin, but the message was clear; you had messed up.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t—” Your apologies fell on deaf ears as another slap hit your still-sensitive skin.
Hongjoong’s other hand went to your back, holding you in place. “Count ‘em.”
Another slap rang through your ears, and you couldn’t help but moan at the sensation. “Sir, I’m sorry–”
“I said.” Hongjoong’s fingers threaded through your hair, bending your head up until you could feel him breathing by your ear. “Count them.” His hand left your hair and went back to rubbing the burning skin of your ass. 
After managing to count to ten, Hongjoong’s fingers went from stroking your ass to rubbing your aching pussy. A soft mewl left your lips and you couldn’t help but to wriggle your hips. Your brain was fried at this point, and Hongjoong could tell. His hand disappeared from where you needed it most, although you had no time to complain about it. The handcuffs came undone, and your arms fell to your sides. He flipped you on your back, your aching thighs resting heavenly against the soft, cool sheets. Hongjoong got on top of you, pressing a few uncharacteristically soft kisses on your jaw and neck.
“You okay, sweetheart?” he murmured, barely audibly.
You could only nod your head as you wrapped your arms around his neck. After you pressed a kiss on his temple, Hongjoong pulled back with a lovesick grin. His face was flushed, his pupils dilated, and his hair a mess. He looked angelic.
“You can keep going,” you muttered. “I can take it.”
“Oh yeah?”
You used the little strength you had left to lean up and kiss his plump lips—soft and chaste, your lips just barely touching before you laid back down. “Yeah.”
His lips attached to your neck again with a new sense of passion and intensity. You let your eyes fall close as a hum bubbled up your throat, your hands spreading out on his back to keep him close. You gripped the fabric of his shirt tightly, trying to pull it up.
“Off,” was all you managed to get out. Despite wanting to keep teasing you, Hongjoong didn’t have the strength to do so. His shirt went over his head and flew somewhere else in the room, just like your clothes had earlier. His pants followed shortly after, and soon enough you finally got to feel his naked flesh against yours. 
Hongjoong’s hips were moving agonizingly slow against yours, but you had no voice to complain about it with—his lips wouldn’t leave yours. When your hand tried to go down your body to rub your clit, his hand was quick to pin your wrist to the bed.
“Let me take my time,” he murmured against your lips.
“You’ve been teasing me for so long,” you muttered back.
“You want control, baby?” he asked mockingly. Before you could say anything else, you found yourself on top of him. “Ride me. Take control.”
As soon as you tried to move your hips up, you realized just how tired your thighs were. A broken whine escaped your lips as you tried your best to set a pace. Hongjoong’s hands landed on your hips. He must’ve taken pity on you, as his hands started guiding you to follow a steady pace.
“That’s it, baby,” he hummed. “You’re doing so good.”
Your mouth fell open as you managed to pick up the pace—your climax quickly approaching. Hongjoong’s hips started to move to match your pace. The sound of skin slapping against skin mixed with your moans growing in volume. Endless praise echoed from his lips, but they just barely met your ears. Only when he told you to cum could you really hear him.
When your climax finally hit, it was like a tidal wave, powerful and unstoppable, crashing over you and stealing the breath from your lungs. You cried out, your body arching as the sensation consumed you. Hongjoong help you through it, his arms a secure anchor in the storm of your release. His own climax followed, his body shuddering against yours, and in that moment, everything else faded away, leaving only the two of you intertwined in a pure, unfiltered intimacy that left you both breathless and sated.
-
You and Hongjoong lay entwined in bed, your breaths mingling in the soft, golden glow of the bedside lamp. The tender patterns his fingers traced on your skin whispered promises of comfort, a soothing contrast to the fiery intensity you shared just moments before. The warmth of his body against yours wrapped you in a cocoon of safety, easing the lingering heat of your passion, yet beneath his gentle caresses, a flicker of concern danced in his eyes.
"Are you okay?" he asked softly, his voice barely a breath above the silence. "I didn't... go too far, did I?"
Turning to face him, you cupped his cheek, your hand cradling his face with a tender intimacy. His eyes searched yours, seeking any sign of unease or regret. "I'm more than okay," you whispered with a soft smile, your thumb brushing lightly over his cheekbone.
Hongjoong exhaled, releasing a breath he'd unknowingly held, his gaze softening, though the shadow of worry still lingered. "I just... I worry a lot," he admitted, a sheepish chuckle escaping his lips.
You shook your head gently, brushing your thumb across his lips, feeling the warmth of his breath, the softness of his touch. "I know, my love," you murmured. "I want you to feel just as safe and cherished with me."
His eyes closed briefly under your touch, relief washing over him in waves. When he opened them again, there was a new light, a quiet resolve in his gaze. "I do feel safe with you," he confessed, his voice steadier now, carrying the weight of sincerity.
Your smile deepened, warmth spreading through you. "Good," you replied, intertwining your fingers with his, feeling the steady rhythm of his pulse, a comforting reminder of your connection.
The air between you grew lighter, the weight of unspoken fears dissolving with each shared word. There was a clarity, a deep understanding that bound you both in that moment. Hongjoong took a deep breath, his eyes locking onto yours with a look of profound connection.
"I... I love you," he murmured, the words tinged with both hesitation and certainty, hanging in the air like a fragile confession.
Your heart skipped a beat, overwhelmed by the depth of his emotions. "I love you too," you replied softly, your voice a tender echo of his confession.
Hongjoong’s arms tightened around you, his body molding to yours as though it had always been meant to be this way. You felt the gentle rise and fall of his chest, each breath syncing perfectly with yours, creating a harmonious symphony of togetherness. His hand stroked your back in slow, soothing circles, sending ripples of warmth through your soul.
The room was bathed in a soft, golden light, the bedside lamp casting delicate shadows that danced across the walls. The world outside faded into oblivion, leaving only the two of you in this intimate sanctuary. Hongjoong’s breath brushed against your forehead, his lips pressing a tender kiss there, sealing the moment with gentle affection. His fingers found yours, interlacing them with a loving squeeze. As you gazed into his eyes, you found them brimming with a depth of emotion that mirrored your own. Without breaking the gaze, he brought your knuckles to his lips. In that moment, clarity washed over you both—this was where you belonged.
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