#(context: my sibling and my friend's noise projects.) | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

quillthrillswriting · 9 months ago

Text

wow, i am on a writing spree today! new chapter of my aged up aang au fanfic should be coming at all of you weekly on wednesdays or thursdays, and the following is an excerpt from my draft of ch2 of "the teenager in the iceberg"

without further ado, enjoy water tribe sibling chaos

for context, this immediately follows aang being hauled off by zuko and the rest of his ship.

---

Katara felt a little piece of something inside her break with the click of the ship’s hull closing.

There was something so unsettling about being given so much hope and having it all ripped away from her only over the course of one day. She watched the ship push off from the ice and turn away, moving toward the imprisonment of the boy Katara had just realised could save the world. Her gloved hand stayed clasped over her mouth, her body frozen in shock, as she watched the ship fade. After a few minutes, she became aware that Sokka was tugging at her coat. She blinked, shook her head, and turned to him.

“Katara,” Sokka said urgently, and Katara knew what he was going to tell her before he said a word.

“I know. We have to go after him, somehow.” Katara bit her lip, absent-mindedly playing with Aang's bracelet, still woven around her wrist.

Sokka nodded sharply. “He’s our responsibility, no matter how much I berated him when we met earlier. We need to find that sky monster of his, it’s the only way we’ll be able to catch up with the ship.”

“Aang called it a sky bison.”

“He also didn’t tell us that he was the Avatar, so I’m not sure if we can take everything he says at face value,” Sokka pointed out as Katara rolled her eyes. He cocked a grin. “C’mon, let's go get the little guy.”

“Aang’s taller than you!” Katara called after him, rushing to keep up with Sokka’s longer strides.

“Sure, in his dreams!” The decidedly-shorter-than-Aang boy called back.

When they did manage to find Appa, he was sitting at the rear entrance to the village, peacefully napping and ignoring the flood of small children poking at his fur. When he raised his head to look up at Katara and Sokka as their footsteps approached, the sky bison looked less than amused.

“Here’s the deal, bucko.” Sokka said matter of factly, accompanying his words with sharp gestures and exaggerated syllables, as if Appa was deaf. “Your friend needs your help, and WE need YOUR help to get to him. You get the picture?” Without waiting for any kind of affirmation, Sokka nodded briskly then scrambled up to Appa’s back, settling into what appeared to be the driver's seat.

Appa did not move, didn’t even blink.

Sokka blinked, utterly bewildered. “How do we get him to, y’know, go?”

Katara scoffed, stepping closer and resting a hand on the creature’s nose. Appa huffed and leaned into her touch, then sniffed, making a sad rumbling noise. Katara’s brow furrowed in confusion until she followed Appa’s line of sight to Aang’s wood and linen bracelet, clasped loosely around her wrist. She clumsily reached for it, sliding it off awkwardly to hold out to Appa.

“He needs you.” Katara breathed, “Aang needs you.” “He’s not gonna-” Sokka started, but as Katara slid onto Appa’s back, they felt him begin to levitate. Sokka huffed, crossing his arms dramatically. “Spirits, I hate when you’re right and I’m wrong.”

♥ check out the first chapter of this (ongoing) fic & my ao3 here! ->

35 notes · View notes

itsaary · 3 years ago

Text

This will be entirely out of context because I cannot seem to get a comprehedable summary of the AU down without accidentally adding another few details, but a Roleswap AU that has Luz in the position of the Collector, Lilith as Empress and Edalyn as Amber Guard.

Luz is not completely faultless when it comes to blood on her hands.

"Come on, it'll be fine! You can do all this crazy stuff I have no opportunity to try, I just have to see how this one turns out! Lilith is out to attend some random meeting, she won't be around before evening."

"I don't know, Luz. She won't be happy with me if she does find out, and I'd hate to disappoint her."

"Good thing she won't then! Come on, last one's a Slowpoke!"

"Hey, not fair, you can literally teleport!" Regardless of her earlier hesitance she broke out into a sprint, catching some odd glances from patrolling guards. "And stop making references I can't understand!"

...

It couldn't have gone more wrong. The meeting was cancelled, she'd caught them setting up small silly traps all over the place, harmless pranks meant to entertain, and of course she was furious. Marilyn had carried the equipment, unable to react quickly enough to activate an invisibilty glyph with her arms currently full. So while Luz could simply slither out of vision to avoid detection, blending in with regular shadows, her buddy in crime remained plain in sight.

Not to say Lilith was foolish enough (Believed her project so utterly failed) to think her niece had come up with the plans by herself. She does not mention this, though, expression blank as she wordlessly drags the Grimwalker towards the chamber designated to make new ones, deliberately telegraphing where they are headed. Of course, only Luz knows the place as what it is, upon realizing what is going to happen reappearing in a flash, admitting to everything, to tell her it was her fault alone and her sister doesn't deserve this she did nothing wrong-

Her eyes narrow, because while she suspected, annoyed, they harboured some kind of connection, this was her and her sibling alone, clone or not. How dare she claim herself part of their perfect family? Was she not utterly out of reach, the Empress would have very well struck her down right then and there, made her suffer through her worst spells for the false accusation. But she remains calm, reminding herself she is a necessary asset to her plans. Besides, she has a much better idea of how to punish her, anyway.

This is the most gruesome death any of the constructs have had to live through, intentionally drawn out, as painful as possible. The chamber is soundproof, however, screams falling on deaf ears. And Luz can only look on in horror as she watches it all play out. (As she begins to doubt that this could be love)

Tone sweet as appleblood she turns around, noise finally beginning to quiet as her artificial life flows out of the woods fibers. "I am sorry this had to happen, Luz, but you know my sister cannot be flawed. I do not blame you for reaching out, but let this be a reminder. You were given a chance and you messed it up, this is ultimately your fault. Go ahead if you want to try again, however, be warned I won't be as merciful next time. Now excuse me, I have to fix your mistakes."

She took a week to make a new one. There's nothing quite as painful as meeting the eyes of one you used to love, still love, and see no recognition spark in them. Nothing worse than watching your big sister your friend live a happier life, unaware you exist.

The next time they interact by chance, she introduces herself as Nightlight, staying as distant as possible.

Does it truly matter if there would be a dozend more called by the same name, sharing her face? Does it truly matter if she has never physically touched her at all?

--------------------------------------------

I apologize for the quality of writing, it is not really a final version. There is technically a whole AU to this, we just haven't figured out what to name it yet. My personal favourite, other than Collector!Luz (somewhat) is actually the starchild in place of Vee, of course tweaked to some degree.

If I've accidentally imitated anyone elses AU I apologize, such was by no means intentional, I simply love coming up with and telling stories.

#toh #the owl house #collector luz #luz noceda #lilith clawthorne #role swap au #edalyn clawthorne

23 notes · View notes

letsmustafa · 4 years ago

Text

COMMUNICATION

I) Introduction :

“Communication is your ticket to success, if you pay attention and learn to do it effectively” - Theo Gold (Author of Positive Thinking)

The very vital ingredient of life is to share feelings, expressions, to be get heard and add meanings. In fact, the key to life is means to communicate. In other word, we can say, only through communication can human life hold meaning. The process of understanding each other, express ideas, sharing opinion and passing of information or facts. And therefore, it’s imperative to be potent with effective communication skills and techniques in order to enrich the communication process more meaningful and efficient, eventually to be successful in any desired aim or task. We all are bind in relationship whether at home, workplace or in social affairs. Base of successful relationship is communication, and to do it effectively we have to be master in the art of effective communication. To communicate effectively, one must understand the emotion behind the information being said. Understanding communication skills such as; listening, verbal and non-verbal communication, and managing stress can help better the relationships one has with others.

“Your ability to communicate is an important tool in your pursuit of your goals, whether it is with your family, your co-workers or your clients and customers” - Lee Brown (American politician, criminologist and businessman)

For many, communication seems like a gift. In reality, it is a skill that can be learned through education and practice. Thus, I strongly believe that, each and every individual can grow and become successful in their respective filed and achieve their desired goal if they are championed in effective communication and eager to learn and adopt it as their essential skill set.

II) About Me :

Born and brought up in defense area, a town in India, my upbringing has great influenced of military culture. Being retried naval personnel, my father has always given utmost important to disciplined life be it in education, sports or workplace. My mother, a housemaker, truly believe in freedom of open thinking and expression. She has been source of inspiration for us as siblings to pursue our dreams and has her immense support in every manner to achieve it. I, being the youngest, had more privilege to be with her and get nurtured under the shadow as the wife of warrior, a tough warrior in real life.

As a defense ward, I was fortunate for having had my schooling in military school throughout and chance of meeting and interacting with colleagues coming from different part of the country. Spending my early life with friends, each one with special personality may it be their language, culture, living style, faith etc., was actually the great learning. I must say, defense kids are breed apart. They can adjust everywhere and has ability to manage life with everyone because of their wide exposure in their initial days. They are really blessed with skills to express themselves quite effectively and bond easily to create value network in life.

Post completing my graduation, I moved to metro city New Delhi. City with full of scope and hope. Opportunity in every field and avenue to fulfill our dreams. I did my post-graduation (PG) here with an ambition of successful career in corporate world, and hence PG in an MBA with finance and marketing as specialization. Since then I’m a working professional in different sectors namely IT/ITES, HR Consulting and Real Estate respectively. My work domain largely involved; business development, marketing communication (MarCom), client relationship (CRM) and event management. My key result area (KRAs) also involved the part of database management (DBMS), management information (MIS) and team handling.

With having experience of 12 years in different sectors and domain altogether, I always find a scope of learning, improvement and areas to challenge myself to upscale a level ahead from where I was last standing. Upgrading the communication tactics and strategy is organization demand to align with sophisticated corporate purpose and achieving core objectives. Sometime rejection and disapproval are obvious outcome. However, answer to all is keep on brushing and strengthening the communication strategies, keep it effective and nurture leadership quality with dynamic approach simultaneously.

“When you give yourself permission to communicate what matters to you in every situation you will have peace despite rejection or disapproval. Putting a voice to your soul helps you to let go of the negative energy of fear and regret” - Shannon L. Alder (An inspirational author)

III) Communication strategy and leadership:

Taking role as senior executive level, it’s important to quickly establish or elevate communication skill sets or program. I understand that, the higher we go, more people within the organization would want to know about what we are going to do and how will we do it. We may have inherited hundreds of staff distributed across the world, to whom we may need to communicate regarding our renewed mission, strategy or brand objectives. Furthermore, there may be numerous other stakeholders outside the company that we have to communicate to, like investors, banks, customers etc. Disciplined communication strategy is essential to get across the critical message to key stakeholders without it being drowned by the noise or lost in translation.

It is crucial to implement excellent communication strategy for success in business world. To encourage members of a company to work together effectively. How team and team members within a company interact determines whether projects will run smoothly or be fraught with challenges. This is where leadership comes in. Good leadership and effective communication go hand in hand. Leaders interact with every team and a large number of employees, how a leader communicates sets the tone for the rest of the organization. Good leader should able to motivate, persuade and encourage others to work towards a common goal.

“When the conduct of men is designed to be influenced, persuasion, kind, unassuming persuasion, should ever be adopted. It is an old and a true maxim, that ‘a drop of honey catches more flies than a gallon of gall” - Abraham Lincoln (Statesman, lawyer and former US president)

It’s essential to identify the leadership style for better understanding on how we must interact with, and perceived by, employees across the organization. Irrespective of the position, we need to develop our individual leadership style and cultivate the essential habit of self-awareness. Even before entering the managerial position, leadership qualities are required depending upon the context and situation. It may be goal oriented, action based, people centric, behavioral etc. Excellent communication skills are required to manage a team at workplace or to manage organization efficiently. And communication gets affected by different leadership styles. To conclude, effective communication and leadership together gives an effective leadership communication. Communication makes a leader effective who develops better understanding in teams. These understanding bring a sense of trust in employees on the leader and on each other, work together, which further reinforce congenial relations with team members and creates an excellent work atmosphere. This enhance the dedication towards work and eventually helps to achieve the desired targets. Conceptual model of effective leadership communication can be explained as below –

Strategic Narrative -

There has been a tangential shift in the way communication is being approached in organizations today. This tangential shift from a formal directive method of communication to a more engaging and inclusive conversational style. The distance between the sender and the receiver is getting shorter and the need for inclusivity and relationship building through communication is getting stronger. One of the major reasons for this shift is the evolution of the workforce and the relationships they hope to make in the workplace. Formality and hierarchy have made way for equality and a flatter organization structure. It’s a common refrain in executive suites these days: “We need a new narrative.” Therefore, story telling is very effective way to excite, attract customers, to engage and motivate. A story that is concise but comprehensive.

“Storytelling can be described as the art of communication using stories and narratives”

When a person needs to be motivated or action is desired out of him/her, communication in the form of stories will generate a stronger reaction when compared to passive data given to him/her.

Active Listening, Receiving and Implementing Feedback –

“When people talk, listen completely. Most people never listen” - Ernest Hemingway (An American journalist, novelist, short-story writer, and sportsman)

Effective leaders know when they need to talk and, more importantly, when they need to listen. employees’ opinions, ideas, and feedback are valuable. And when they do share, actively engage in the conversation—pose questions, invite them to elaborate, and take notes. It’s important to stay in the moment and avoid interrupting. It’s critical, though, that you don’t just listen to the feedback. You also need to act on it, to build up the faith, trust and transparency. By letting your employees know they were heard and then apprising them of any progress you can, or do, make, they’ll feel as though you value their perspective and are serious about improving.

IV) Conclusion :

Communication is the core of effective leadership. To influence and inspire the team, we’ve to be championed in transparency and practicing empathy. Need to understand how other perceive one’s perspective basis on verbal and non-verbal cues. Figure out the scope of improvement and development process and align the plan to guide and track progress.

#effective communication #leadership #leadership communication #storytelling #active listening #persuasion #empathy #compassion #teambuilding #transparency #feedback

4 notes · View notes

creatingnikki · 5 years ago

Text

Dearest Atlas,

That is a really fun choice for a pseudonym. Perhaps, your actual name? Unlikely but for the sake of this letter and me you’re Atlas irrespective. So, hello! You’re almost a decade younger to me and I must admit, I’m a little nervous to write you this love letter. I’ve never had an issue writing or interacting with people older to me by 3-4 decades even. But talking to someone younger always takes me back to when I was their age and how much I hated older people acting as though they knew better.

Of course, now after growing up I have realized that it’s just natural for you to know more and learn more as you live more (exceptions exist always and there’s not an equal increase in age and knowledge/wisdom, as we all know). I mean, compared to a 5 year old, you know so much more. But I think the one place where most adults go wrong is that instead of looking after those younger to them, they either patronize them or exploit them. Shouldn’t we, by default look after those younger to us? Protect them, so that they don’t lose their innocence and heart due to this shit world as early as we did? This sentiment is why I love a classic that most people don’t – The Catcher in the Rye by J.D Salinger. If you haven’t read it, I highly recommend it. I will warn you that the narrator is annoying but his heart is in the right place and that’s the most important thing.

I guess since I’ve already started writing this letter my nervousness is out the window. Do forgive me if at any place I come across as preachy or pretentious. Know that isn’t one bit intentional.

You know how I know I’m no longer a teenager? Because I just spent 10 minutes looking up what LB(BT) means. I still don’t know but as per Google this is what it could mean:

Let’s be bored together (doesn’t fit the context as you said ‘I’m LB(BT)’)

Something related to LGBTQ+ (Is it?)

Lembaga Bela Banua Talino (Which is an Institute for Community Legal Resources Empowerment – umm probably not?)

When older people would be so clueless with slangs like LOL and TTYL and BRB 10 years ago I would think, ‘Are they serious? What’s not to get in that?’ But this is a WTF moment for me because I have crossed over to the other side, clearly. Anyway, now I’m quite curious so do let me know, please! Haha

Though, I do have a really embarrassing and silly story related to internet slang and ‘brb’. So this was back in 8th grade – 2010 – when I had just joined Facebook and had started to talk to this senior in school who I soon developed a crush on. Now, you need to know 2 things for context:

Back then everyone in school would type in “chat language” which was very “cool”. For instance, ‘What is up with you?’ would be typed as ‘wht is up wth u?’

This guy would use terms of endearment for me like sweetheart, darling, etc. *pukes*

So, for a whole week when we would chat, and he would use ‘brb’ during our conversation I had no idea what it was but I just assumed it was another term of endearment. Oh my god. Shall I even say it? Okay…so I thought it was….barbie. YES WHY WOULD HE CALL ME THAT. It’s bloody weird but my 14 year old brain worked in weird ways, and yes you’re a whole lot smarter than I was at 14, and I just assumed that. Why I continued talking to a guy who I thought called me ‘barbie’, I do not know. From entering the world of social media at 14 and not knowing slangs like the back of my hand to reaching here – writing a letter to a 14 year old and not knowing another slang’s full form – a I believe I have reached a full circle. Thank you? I think it’s very humbling but also grounding to realise how old you are or just how much time has passed by. Adulting is quite disorienting and moments like these are needed.

And thankfully, I know what you mean when you say you’re Wiccan. And I think that’s pretty cool! Around when I was 16 I read a Jodi Piccoult book about teen Wiccans and I was so fascinated that post that I did 3 things:

Convinced my friend to become Wiccan with me

Installed an app for spells

Convinced my mom to let me get a tattoo with a sentence from the Wiccan Rede

My friend ditched me, the spells on that app needed things that weren’t accessible to me and I was too much of a chicken to actually get inked (still don’t have a single tattoo!) and none of those things ever really materialised. In yet another way you’re so much smarter than I was back then. I keep saying this not to be weird but to admire you and just express how in awe I am by certain things you mentioned.

Shall I just paste the Wiccan Rede here for everyone to see how beautiful and solid it is? Or perhaps the end of it that hit me the most?

“With a fool no season spend or be counted as his friend.

Merry Meet and Merry Part bright the cheeks and warm the heart.

Mind the Three-fold Laws you should three times bad and three times good.

When misfortune is enow wear the star upon your brow.

Be true in love this you must do unless your love is false to you.

These Eight words the Rede fulfill:

“An Ye Harm None, Do What Ye Will”

And the sentence I wanted to get a tattoo of? Any guesses?

Well – An Ye Harm None, Do What Ye Will.

While I didn’t get it, I do want to talk about it.

People will always tell you what to do and what to be and what to think and how to behave and what to not wear and what to see and what to not talk about. These people will be your friends, parents, teachers, siblings, relatives, strangers, lovers, the government, employers, enemies and bullies. A lot of them will be well-intentioned and that’s where it will get tricky. But you should always do what feels right to you. No matter who says what. Stand up for what you believe in no matter who or how many people are against it. That’s from the book To Kill A Mockingbird by Harper Lee and another book that I highly recommend.

As you grow older, the lines between good and bad, black and white, brave and weak will quickly and confusingly blur. You’ll have to make a million choices, a lot of which won’t matter in a few years while some will stay with you for the rest of your life. And sometimes it will feel like you’re in a maze and thick fog (all the confusion between what’s right and what’s wrong) is surrounding you and there is this loud, piercing noise (other people’s voices) that won’t stop until you find your way out that maze. What’s waiting for you outside? Some people think it’s success, money, love, or even death. It really depends on how you see things and what’s the most important to you.

To me? I think what’s waiting out there for me is peace and truth. Lately, I’ve been able to find my way out but it’s only seconds until I’m dragged back inside. So, how to figure a permanent way out this maze is my journey next. I don’t know anything. No one knows anything. But yet people insist on pretending to know. And sometimes that’s important too (like at work). But I hope when you’re on your journey of figuring things out for yourself, you do what feels right to you and only remember – An ye harm none do what ye will.

A picnic with your friend family where everything was so happy sounds like such a precious and beautiful memory. I’m glad you got to experience that and I can only hope that while you navigate your way through the maze, you find such absolutely lovely and blissful moments in plenty. And as for your ex who sent you anon hate – so glad that such an ass is out of your life. As someone who has received a lot of nasty anon hate on tumblr, I know it hurts the most when you suspect (more like just know it) that it’s someone who used to be close to you. I guess that’s the other stuff hiding in the maze – bitterness and pain. But I think as long as you have a few people who have the best interests for you at heart who hold your hand and figure the way out together, you’re going to be okay.

So, Atlas, I do think this turned out to be a tad bit didactic but know that’s only because the part inside of me that’s still 14 is cheering on for you and sending you much love.

xoxo

Nikki

PS I know I’ve given you 2 book recs already but here’s a third one cos I think you’d quite like it – Undead Girl Gang by Lily Anderson. It’s a book about two high school best friends who are Wiccans and one of them kills herself and the other uses a spell to bring her back to live temporarily to figure out what really happened.

Guys, February is 29 days of love letters. I’m writing love letters, as part of The Love Project, and if you’d like me to write one to you, drop me an email at [email protected]

There are 10 more spots left, and you can still be a part of it if you’d like :D

I wrote this letter for Atlas based on some questions they answered. You can read their answers here.

#the love project #29 days of love letters #young wiccan #letter 6 #let me write you love letters #valentines day #happy valentines day #valentine's day #valentine #love letters #love letter #writing love letters #catcher in the rye #to kill a mockingbird #undead girl gang #wicca #wiccan #growing up #creatingnikki

10 notes · View notes

thanidiel · 7 years ago

Text

Training Day

[Here is a collaborative story composed by me and @trained-trainwreck or Ethalarian of the Sunguard for a guild prompt issued to us!]

Between Ethalarian’s humour, Thanidiel’s boldness, and their combined relation to the roughspun lives of the People at their simplest - the soldiers managed to coax one-hundred-and-seventeen bodies from the able-bodied men and women of Kris away from their labors for two weeks of training.

Not the most desirable, but, still, leagues beyond what the citizens of this far-out province would be able to provide when placed amongst merely themselves.

The two had developed an accelerated program of training a unified fighting force during their southern bound travel. The volunteers ‘hind their backs from both military companies would partner up with the Citizenship. They would run through the basics on the first three days: of unity, of tools, of formation and movement. From there, the remaining thirteen days would be legitimate, all-rounded, exercises to stress the militia to its limits.

A trial of searing fire. So that no lashing heat in the days afterward may break them in the Sunspears’ absence, a remnant from their past allegiances and the severity of service demanded.

Thus, they had decided. And, thus, have they acted.

Thanidiel stands shoulder-to-shoulder with a dozen men in either direction. A row of glinting, near-blinding, gold in the sunlight; casted with periodic shadows of crimson and mellowed paint.

In normal circumstances, there ought to be some form of concern towards the thought of taking over another’s company in command. Here? There was no such thing. The people of both units were well-acquainted with one another and their Captains, for training skirmishes between the individual one-hundreds is a regular occurrence in the Dawnspire Training Ground whether on foot or horseback. Similarly, many of the soldiers around her harken back to those of the old Order; either attracted to the primordial names of Highdawn and Dawnstalker, or of similar mind to the resignations signed by the two former Knights.

In that light, the Phoenix Guard has no issue in seamlessly falling into step with the twenty-four to her flanks and the twenty-five ahead of them. Together, in the unspoken bond of blood and sweat that curls around all of their limbs in stringed performance, they move. Synchronised, all soldiers tighten their grips on their targe shields. United, all raise their spears with hands curled towards the butt of the weapons, causing the tools to jut out a near three yards in front of the simple formations.

Renalays stands a distance away, close to the large crowd of Kris citizens and other men-at-arms surrounding them. The Duskward can feel the subtle itch of her old comrade’s Shadow, ready to pluck her words from the winds and scatter them in snowing whispers that would reach the ears of every elf in observation. Thanidiel doubts it would be needed, but precautions are always useful things.

Even confined within her greathelm, her voice cracks over the field like the roll of traveling thunder. Decades of command have learned the fighter well in how to project clean from her diaphragm and cut through the din of warfare like the penetrating length of waving steel.

“The spear is the tool we have brought to you from the forests and quarries of the Dawnspire, for it is the most deadly you will find in any army!

It is a tool that emphasises victory in Unity, much like the Unity found today between the provinces of Kris and Dawnspire; south and north; the Blood shared between all Children of High Home. Your goal, when whatever prey comes at you whether it is Nightmare or bandit, will not be the slaying of what is in front of you. Your goal, when you’ve a spear in your hand and your comrades aside you, will be the support of the woman to your right; the man to your left.”

By now, all fifty sabatons march in the characteristic noise of plate sections clattering against leather and chain, the frenzied energy crashing against the grass below. Still in perfect bond, both lines spur into their faux combat.

In the midst of this controlled chaos, Thanidiel continues to boom over it all. Demonstrating the qualities of the spear in the context conveyed to the Kris people, her scanning vision catches the movement of a soldier preparing to stab towards a comrade two-men-down from her right. Raising her targe shield upward, and trusting in the fighters to her left, she extends in counter-assault.

“The root of all success is in the care of your fellows. Your daughters take your wheat to your market. Your sons harvest it. Your parents shelter you. Your friends repair your plows. Your governors provide you road and contract of sale. Your militia protects your fields. So too, does every soldier cooperate in everyone’s mutual safety to claim victory.”

Hefting her right shoulder outward, the arm, bent inward, extends outward in practiced motion. The lengthy spear held overheard stabs right for the woman who wished to ‘bleed’ her ally in this exercise. Crossing three yards diagonal, the weapon impacts its blunted head against the collar of the unfortunate woman with jarring force. Swiftly pulling back her arm, the Duskward observes the agreed-upon drop of the soldier onto the green earth (with some honesty noted there - that one will be examined for a broken bone later).

The showcase continues on, every person tasked with the protection and assistance of their left and right, in a flurried cacophony of spears knocking one another aside, thudding scrapes along the curve of shields, and the clatter of steel when weapons find home and push ‘enemies’ into the soil.

Eventually, the demonstration is whittled down to the participation of twenty-three soldiers, with the current Commander’s force outpacing the other row before them.

“Cease!”

Simultaneously, all spears are lowered and thrown into the empty span between the two lines. Every man and woman moves then in silent order to clasp their shields to their girdles and begin the work of uplifting the fallen and separating those genuinely hurt in the exercise. In the center of them, the Phoenix Guard pushes on.

“Thus, you see the power of the tools we will provide to every head here to keep. Its range, its power, and its versatility in defense and offense, is unmatched concerning what may be placed into anyone’s hands on the battlefield.

Consider this my gracious introduction. Now you have our expectation in the use of these tools displayed. Tomorrow will be a thorough mastery of the spear with the assistance of the soldiers aside you. You will bruise, you will bleed, and you will break. In that fashion, all volunteers present, you, Children of Iron, will be wrought into Steel.

For now? We will continue our focus on the lifeblood of victory; Unity. No one will fall behind. No one will exceed. No one will be forgotten.

You will observe this well in the coming days as every soldier beside you now will be at your aid, and you, theirs. You will learn to love your comrades, new and old, temporary or permanent, like siblings fed from the same milk and blood. That is how you will send any threats that come for Kris into the clasp of the earth - permanently.

In the spirit of Unity, command passes to Lightward Ethalarian Dawnstalker. He will introduce you, as I did, to another topic; how to form and move as one.

And he will further demonstrate how the success of combat relies not on individual strength or passion - but togetherness.”

With that, Thanidiel draws back into the crowd with a hand pulling her waterskin to her hoarse lips, and shifts into merely another face in the crowd.

It was at this point that Ethalarian stepped forward through the assembled mass of gleaming plate and towering spears until he stood at the head of the formation. Gone was his once signature scarlet and black now replaced by the warmer, brighter crimson and gold of the Sunguard. It was simple, for the most part, and far more reflective of his previous life- no ornate etching, nor expensive exotic metals, but layers of chainmail and partial plate overlapping a leather hauberk. His cuisses and greaves were much the same; simple yet sturdy leather and plate all reflective of his upbringing- and perhaps strategically chosen to appeal to the common folk of Kris.

“Greetings, my brothers and sisters. I thank you all for your attendance; it warms my heart to see communities come together in defense of one another.” The knight offers a wide, warm smile to each of those before him, his tone kindly and honeyed. These are no soldiers and he cannot dare to speak to them as such. Not yet. “My colleague-” he gestures to Thanidiel here “-has already demonstrated to you all the individual merits of the spear and the shield on an individual level.

As you’ve all observed, and as Duskward Highdawn has capably demonstrated, these are effective tools that allow you to safely engage your enemy from afar and to cover your brother’s flanks. An individual with a spear can keep at bay an enemy with less reach nigh indefinitely. However.”

At this point Etharian turns sharply about to face the formation behind him. “About, face!”

His voice echoes across the field like a cannon shot and immediately is answered by the rumble and clatter of armored troops wheeling about in a matter of moments. The Sunguard’s banners had caught the breeze and were flying high now in the afternoon sun above Kris as a second formation, a group of volunteers from the villagers, took up position to the left. As anticipated, the latter had little idea of what to do or how to do it but did their best to mimic the Sunguard formation anyway and packed together as tightly as they could. Admirable. Ethalarian gave a slight nod as he turned now toward a broad shouldered, raven haired elf at his left.

“Sergeant Heartwood, give the signal if you please.”

With a nod, the Sergeant’s chest swelled as he drew in a deep breath and raised a horn to his lips that sounded at an almost deafening volume that echoed for several seconds across the rolling hills. A few short moments later, a low rumble began to roll in toward Kris from just over the next rise that grew louder and louder with each passing second. Within a minute a dark blob appeared upon the rise and was quickly followed by a chorus of shouts and jeers as the Enemy for this grand demonstration appeared.

Ethalarian grinned a crooked grin as he gestured up toward the Enemy and turned his attention back toward the gathered townsfolk.

“The Enemy presents itself and is set to lend credence to this next lesson: taking the field are two groups, equal in number and armed much the same.”

Now his attention falls to the group of volunteer soldiers, each looking more pale than the next. They had not fallen apart yet, not begun to disperse or rethink what they’d gotten themselves into but flight had definitely crossed their minds.

“Before you are the Blood Knights from the Eleventh Regiment. They are hardened soldiers, veterans of a dozen wars over the course of the past twenty years. For this example, the Enemy has been instructed to show no mercy- to treat this battle as they would the real thing.”

One of the volunteers toward the front took a half-step back.

His will was already faltering.

The rest would follow soon.

Excellent.

Again Ethalarian turned to Sergeant Heartwood and without a word the latter again sounded his horn. Without delay the dark blob upon the hill surged forward, pouring down from the as though an inkwell had been overturned and thundering toward both formations at a full gallop. Their approach was like a clap of thunder that never ended, a deafening rumble that became a roar which threatened to drown out everything else. As the ground began to shake beneath his feet, the Lightward turned his attention back to the man at the fore of the volunteer formation.

Another step back.

Then another.

Then a fourth.

Not long now.

Ethalarian glanced again toward the massive formation of cavalry now practically on top of both formations of infantry. The combined Phoenix Guard and Bloodsworn held strong, their lances and pikes planted firmly in the ground and held aloft at eye level, forcing their foe to wheel about and look for a better opening before trying again.

And then it happened.

The man at the front of the volunteer formation lost his nerve and broke, turning to flee as fast as his feet would carry him.

Then another.

Then them all.

That was all it took to turn the roughly organized group of volunteer mass into a broken, routing mob and the Enemy did not pass up the opportunity to fall upon them with a merciless vigor...or would have, had this been a real battle. Instead the company split and enveloped the fleeing herd of volunteers as pack of starving wolves would circle their prey.

Grinning, the Lightward turned back now to the remainder of the assembled villagers and spoke over the now quieting din.

“As you can see, my brothers and sisters, it is not individual skill that wins the day on the field.” He held up a single finger in turn as he spoke the next three words. “Discipline. Unity. Coordination. Once my colleague has instructed you how to fight as an individual, I will teach you how to apply the lessons you have learned and forge you all into a single cohesive unit.

You will learn to think, breathe, move, and act as one whole. I will not lie to you; this will likely be the most difficult two weeks of your lives. Persevere, however, and I promise your town will be the safest it’s ever been with or without our presence.”

Ethalarian took a moment to survey the crowd now as the defeated made their way back to the group, heads hung low in shame. Good. That would save him the trouble of humbling them later.

“Duskward Highdawn.” He turned over his right shoulder to seek out Thanidiel amongst the otherwise faceless formation.

“I believe it’s time to begin.”

A Phoenix Guard breaks formation, near unidentifiable from any other of the golden-plated soldiers present - were it not for the distinct engravement of horses carved into the fore of the regiment’s symbolic greathelm.

The woman strides to Ethalarian’s side and clasps her grip along the chain sleeve of his midarm as the opposing hand steadies the butt of her spear into the grasses underneath.

“Aye - for Kris.” strikes out from her, shattering the ‘quiet.’

“For Kris,” echoes from one former Blood Knight to the other; like two artillery shots in succession.

The volunteers, hesitant, break the silence in only tiny bubbles in their mimicry of the cry. Natural to their training, the two Sunspear before them roar in correction, in unison:

“WHO DO YOU FIGHT FOR?”

Hiccups of “For Kris!” answer, building in rate that fails to satisfy their instructors until it becomes a wild cacophony that shakes the air.

“For Kris!” “For Kris!” “For Kris!”

“For Kris!” “For Kris!”

“For Kris!”

Then the assembled two-hundred of Bloodsworn and Phoenix Guard join in, and the sheer energy transfers from sky to a rumbling across the whole of the earth. The subtle hand of Kris’ new comrades causes development from chaotic shocks of noise to proper, deafening, unified, waves.

“For Kris!” “For Kris!” “For Kris!”

[Tagging @curiouslich and @sakialyn for their interest as Sunspear officers!]

#ethalarian #thanidiel #allamar #itrius #sunspear #sunguard #writing #friend writing

16 notes · View notes

morfinwen · 7 years ago

Note

For the OC ask, #3 for Ash, #5 for Susanna, #10 for Ian, #13 for Lanzo, and #20 for Angie, please. :)

This was very fun to answer, but it got very long, very quickly, so i’m putting it under a ‘read more’.

3. Ash's greatest achievement

Ash’s great-aunt Philomena was a tall, willowy woman, bent over with age, as many wrinkles as a crumpled ball of paper, and long white hair she hadn't cut since she was in her fifties. Even with a cane, she had difficulty moving around, and since she refused to wear her glasses she was constantly squinting. She also radiated the quiet, immense power of a master wizard, especially when she wore her favorite shawl, the one that seemed to shift color as you looked at it, and faint light escaped from under it like she had trapped stars there. After his mother, she was Ash’s favorite person in the entire world.

For the last two years of high school, Ash spent a few weeks with her during the summer, to help out with some of the big house projects she couldn’t do any more. He also got the chance to help her with enchanting, and discovered he had a real knack for it -- as a nature mage, it was to be expected that he’d naturally be better at enchanting than other types of mages, but even for a nature mage he had a gift. After talking about it with his mother, grandmother, and Philomena herself, it was worked out that Ash would spend a couple years with her in an apprentice-like capacity. So as soon as he graduated high school, he had one weekend to himself, and then it was off to Aldstow, WA.

It turned out to be a lot harder than he had anticipated it being. Ash wasn’t afraid of hard work and Philomena was no slave-driver, but learning enchanting proved to be mentally draining, and there was a lot of physical labor to do around the house as well. With no end date set, he felt more keenly homesick than he had during the past summers, to the point that his nightly calls to his mother often made him cry. On top of that, enchanting was a precise art that was learned at a slow and steady pace, so it felt like he was barely making any progress at all.

Philomena, as mentioned, was no slave-driver, but she was also no hand-holder. She made it plain that if at any point Ash wanted to leave, he could. Ash considered it more than once, and might have even done it if he’d had any idea what he would do once he got home. So he stayed, working himself to exhaustion every day, reading and re-reading his great-aunt’s old, old books, memorizing the precise details of how to grind, measure, weigh, combine, etc. each ingredient, listening to his mother’s voice over the ancient telephone every night, trying and re-trying new enchantments until he got them to work. On a handful of special days, like the equinox and family birthdays, he would go home for a short visit, and at the end of it hug his grandmother, aunts, and mother good-bye again and get back on the bus to Aldstow.

At the time, his biggest achievement was probably when he made a breakthrough with his enchantment studies, when he got something big to work or when he started having more successes than failures. Looking back, though, Ash is most proud of just sticking it out, and not only ending it as Philomena’s most accomplished apprentice, but finding himself in the process.

5: Susanna’s shortcomings

Susanna is loud. You never have to wonder where she is, you only have to listen for the 100 decibels of unnecessary noise coming from somewhere, or else the sound of someone else asking her (in the subdued way of someone trying not to further agitate their shattered eardrums) if she could possibly be just a little quieter. She’s only quiet if she’s trying to sneak somewhere, or unconscious, and sometimes not even then.

Susanna is bossy. She knows exactly what everyone ought to be doing, and how they ought to be doing it. Anything she’s doing with friends is essentially a stage play, with roles described, assigned, and directed by Susanna. And she does not appreciate people going off-script.

Susanna is provocative. She has long since learned what buttons she has to press to annoy her older siblings or get them to go along with her, and has no shame in pressing them if she thinks it’s necessary. While she won’t annoy her brother or scare her sister for no reason, Susanna’s list of acceptable reasons for being obnoxious is considerably longer than most people’s, and includes things like ‘I’m bored’.

Susanna is flippant. If she doesn’t care about something, it doesn’t really matter to her if someone else does. In fact, the very idea of someone caring about something she considers a waste of time rarely occurs to her. She’s frequently sarcastic, and rolls her eyes at anything she considers dumb. She has spent more time in the principal’s office than her other two siblings put together.

This all sounds a bit harsh, so i’d like to offer some mollifying context: Susanna is an eleven-year-old orphan whose parents died when she was four -- her whole world got uprooted and relocated before she had a solid grip on articulating complete sentences, and yet most people seem to think that since she was so young it couldn’t have affected her that much. She feels overshadowed by her siblings -- her older sister can be dramatic and emotional, but is good at connecting with people and making friends; her older brother might not be the next Einstein, but he’s clearly brilliant, and when he talks, adults listen to him with more attention. She knows who she is and what she wants, but outside of meaningless ‘and what do you want to be when you grow up’ questions, no one seems interested in finding out what those things are. And if Susanna sees something that needs changing, she’s darn well going to set about trying to change it.

10: Ian’s fashion sense

You could say Ian doesn’t have a fashion sense. A snooty older female cousin and one of his ex-girlfriends have in fact said that to him, and he didn’t dispute it. What Ian does have is more of a fashion … feel?

Growing up, Ian got most of his clothes from thrift stores. His mother loved thrift stores. Not just because it helped make the money stretch to the end of the month, but because you could always find something with character: plates with frogs on them, a sweater made entirely of fake feathers, creepy dolls, ugly paintings, books with advice someone claimed they received from an angel in a dream. Every month, she and Ian would visit two or three of the nearest ones, donate everything they could, and fill a cart with as much as they could afford.

Most of the kids at Ian’s school got their clothes from department stores. Their t-shirts and shorts and backpacks had popular animated characters on them or whatever print pattern was common in the area at the time. Ian’s clothing, for better or for worse, was usually several years behind, or totally unique. Sometimes that made him a joke, sometimes it made him the envy of the popular kids, but Ian never looked like anyone else at school.

As an adult, Ian doesn’t look that unique anymore. He has to meet a general dress code, some of the music types he lives and works around take ‘looking different’ to an extreme, and for whatever reason the local thrift stores don’t seem to have the same character as the ones in his hometown did. But whenever he picks out his clothes, he goes for whichever ones remind him of shopping with his mom.

… Which means he’s usually dressed like he just time-travelled from two decades before he was born, or is wearing a tartan or gingham button-up shirt, unbuttoned, over one of those vintage label t-shirts you get at Walmart these days, and the same pair of jeans he had on last week. And maybe the week before that. Ian, do you actually own more than one pair of jeans?

13: Lanzo’s embarrassing memory from years ago

Listen. Listen, Lanzo has lived too long and seen and done too much to bother with being embarrassed anymore. In a hundred years, is anyone else going to remember? Is anyone else going to care? No. It isn’t an emotion worth bothering with.

Well, that’s what he’d say, and certainly it’s come closer to being true over time, but there are still some things that are kind of embarrassing to think about.

Lanzo was born to German nobles in the middle ages, and inherited an estate from his parents. It was large and remote, which was convenient for him when he became a vampire. Once Lanzo (back then, he went by the name he had been born with, Gottfried) had his finances in order enough that the estate could essentially run itself, he left the day-to-day management to trustworthy servants, and figured he would live in quiet indolence from then on until eternity.

That plan worked until there was a uprising among the peasants that lived on his land. After this long, Lanzo can’t really recall their specific grievances, or how justified they might have been, but by the time he realized there was a problem, the situation had become serious.

Lanzo could have crushed the uprising by himself if he had really wanted to, but the idea of exposing himself so clearly as a vampire, in a time when people still believed in those kinds of things and had all kinds of ideas on how to handle them, was not an appealing one. So instead he negotiated extensively with them, and in the end wound up leaving the estate in the hands of the peasants, taking with him most of the money and some of the valuable art. It was a story that would perplex future historians to no end.

He can laugh at it now, since he can think of probably a dozen better ways to have handled the situation, not to mention how silly the whole idea of ‘stay on my estate forever’ was in the first place. At the time, though, getting kicked out of his own house to wander Europe until he could figure out something else was really embarrassing.

20: Angie’s reaction to a mystery love letter

Angie knows people. If she’s known someone for a year or only a week, she can read them like a book. She understands them, sometimes better than they understand themselves. If she receives an anonymous love letter from someone she’s met, the chances are good that she knows who it’s from just by reading the first few lines. In some cases, she might even know they were going to send it a week before they actually wrote it. So if she really can’t identify the author, and there’s nothing in it to suggest it was sent by some total stranger who’s stalking her, she would first and foremost be surprised. Beyond that, it would really depend on what was in the letter.

I’m not sure how likely the average person is to inspire other people to send them anonymous love letters, but i think Angie would be at least a little more likely than that. She has this otherworldly quality that can be inspiring or intimidating, but definitely inclines others to see her as slightly separate from the rest of the world, in a good or bad way. If someone admired her romantically, they might not feel they were on equal enough footing to approach her directly.

Thanks for asking!

#ask #answer #OCs #ash jackson #susanna raines #ian grayson #lanzo ramsey #angie mckendrick #valiantarcher

2 notes · View notes

adhdbuzz · 4 years ago

Text

(Quick note - I have copied this over from my main blog - this is my content...)

ADHD, Neurodivergence, Identity…

I want to start blogging about some of my experiences with mental illness and neurodivergence. Two words, that before this year, I would never of used in relation to myself.

One of the most fascinating and somewhat crippling aspects of learning you are neurodivergent, is becoming so hyperaware of your thoughts, actions, personality, wondering what’s you and what’s your diagnosis, (or what you are imagining/projecting because of your diagnosis). I likely drive my friends mad talking or joking about it, but it’s hard to articulate the complete upheaval that learning this about yourself creates. Suddenly your entire history and personhood is re-defined. You have to change your narrative. I spent most of my teenagehood and childhood feeling removed/estranged from the people and world around me. More than feeling an ‘outcast,’ I felt myself an alien. I believed (and felt that others believed), that I was incredibly lazy and did not have the drive to puruse my passions and potential. This left such a hole in my heart and self-confidence. Imagine that you have this great love for something - or many things, but can’t even motivate yourself to take one single step toward it. You lose interest in every hobby you’ve ever taken up and you don’t understand why you can’t just do the thing. It seems easy for everyone else? What am I missing? So you compensate. Suddenly (and very briefly), you are really into note-taking and study blogs and watching countless hours of videos on how to get organised and ‘change your life’ and you imagine what kind of person you could become. Or you start every new year or semester with the goal to just stay on top of things, just remember, just write it down - everyone else does it? Why can’t you? Inevitably, that falls away.

What happens when you can’t maintain this? When suddenly those three assignments are due, you’ve dropped out of your class/hobby, you’ve missed another opportunity, avoided another goal and heard another person tell you, ‘you just need to get organised…’ ‘ you’ve got so much potential, you just need to apply yourself!’ “I don’t understand how you forgot/didn’t do the thing/didn’t write it down!”

I don’t think I can ever effectively describe the impact that this has had on me. There is something so devastating in not understanding there is something different about your brain during the really sensitive, formative years of your life. Because you end up spending so much time trying to work out why you are not like everyone else, why you struggle with things that most people find easy, why it is a constant battle to stay afloat, to have people angry with you/criticising you for something that you both feel should be in your control, but neurologically isn’t.

ADHD is so severly misunderstood. It’s invisible and it is crippling. The image of the little boy in class who can’t sit still or stop talking is such a prevalent and damaging stereotype. Before I got my diagnosis and before I even had looked into ADHD, I spent hours researching what could be wrong with me and doing online ‘tests’. These ranged from anxiety, to depression, Bipolar, PMDD and Personality Disorders, (strangely enough, ADHD often exists alongside other mental illnesses and I was diagnosed with co-morbidities…) But I think this gives a degree of context to what undiagnosed ADHD feels like, because it’s not someone who wont shut up, or sit still. To me it feels like everyone else got a manual on how to be a person and I didn’t. Often times, it’s the depressed, anxious, struggling teenager or young adult, who feels so inadequate, who feels like an alien, who can’t even trust their own passions or interests. Who is in a constant battle to meet the expectations of themselves and those around them. Who’s socially awkward or uncomfortable, who’s disocciated, who can’t follow a conversation, or instructions, who suffers in loud spaces, who struggles with small talk, strangers, shopping centres, keeping themselves and their space clean, uni work, school work, chores, family, friendships, relationships, their identity, their passions, there interests, their personality, regualating their emotions

ADHD is so exhausting, because it’s a constant battle to just meet the base line. Every thing you do from the moment you get up, til the moment you are asleep (and even then) is impacted by it.

Say you have an assignment, and a couple of chores to do on one day. Not a big deal right? Ok so you set an alarm for 8am, except your brain didn’t turn off until 4am the night before, so you get up at mid day, you go to put the washing in, but you forgot to turn on yesterdays load, so you do that first, you go to make a morning coffee, you check the time, it’s 12.30 - where did half an hour go? I just got up?! (Time-blindness). You make your coffee and drink it while checking social media, which sucks you in, because your dopamine depleted brain craves stimuli! You check the time, its 1pm, you tell yourself you’ll scroll for ten more minutes, and that ten minute excuse repeats a few times. It’s 1.30 and now your angry, because why didn’t you have the self control! (Hint: you have a disordered executive function). You put your mug on the sink, promising you’ll come back to it later. You go back to the laundry, you realise you forgot to turn the dryer on. You go to do your assignment, you clear your desk, open laptop, but now you don’t know where to start - you can’t naturally prioritise tasks, or break down the individual steps that need to be done in order to complete an assignment, you must do this with the ‘skills’ you have actively had to learn from a coach, internet etc. It’s like trying to bake a cake with no measuring cups, or recipe! So now you are looking at the assessment outline, and what you’ve worked on already, and trying to close last nights 200 tabs of hyperfixation. You read the outline 5 times without actually reading it, on the 6th you try really hard, you’re fidgeting in your chair, it’s an almost physical pain having to sit there and read it. Your eyes feel glazy, there’s too many words and they look like a big smudge on the page. You quickly check messages (dopamine hit), you come back to the outline. Its been half an hour, you still haven’t started. It’s about 2pm, you havent had lunch or breakfast. You go make a tea and come back. Maybe you need backround music? You spend another 20 minutes finding the right playlist, except its not right because it’s either too stimulating or not stimulating enough. You find another playlist, or you go down the rabbit whole of some movie soundtrack you’ve been meaning to look at. It’s 2.45. The washing! You go back and finally get yesterdays load in the dryer and start the load you meant to do today. Might as well make another tea now that I’m up. Might as well check Facebook now I’ve been interrupted. I’ll start at 3.30. 3.30 rolls around, your sibling gets home from school. Noise, talking, lunchbox rattling, bags being unpacked. Distraction. The noise is painful, your executive function (the impaired part of the ADHD brain) is also responsible for emotional regulation. Suddenly you are so fiercly angry at the noise being made in the rest of the house. It’s so over stimulating it feels like sandpaper on your brain and ears, you feel sick to your stomach with rage, you are crying, sobbing. All because people in the other room are talking. You lay on your bed trying to calm the overwhelm and increasing stress at not having done your assignment. It’s 4pm. Mum asks why you left your mug out, or didn’t do the dishes (you were too busy thinking about doing the washing!) She notes the machine still going and tells you that you wont have time to put it in the dryer tonight, you’ll have to do it tomorrow. But you need those clothes for tomorrow, you’re having breakfast with a friend. You’ll have to reschedule. You message your friend, and repeat the standard script “god I am so sorry, I’m such a mess, can we do later in the morning? I’ve got to do chores…” they can’t reschedule, you cancel. You sit back down with the assignment. You fidget. It feels like a physical pain to have to sit there and force yourself to do it. You’ll do it tomorrow. You pack up, and get ready for bed, removing the pile on your bed back to your desk. Your sheets are unmade, it’s uncomfortable and you feel agitated. You’ve forgotten to brush your teeth, or clean your face. You scroll online, or hyperfocus on a new hobby, project, idea, that wont interest you tomorrow, until 3am. You set your alarm for 8am…

This is just one small example and snapshot of ADHD and the impact of Executive Dysfunction. Here are a couple of examples/descriptions of how it feels from the ADHD subreddit.

“Schrodinger’s ADHD: Everything is interesting and boring at the same time. Every subject, every hobby.”

‘The Two ADHD Moods: I can’t do it / I can’t stop doing it. The two types of ADHD time: Now / Not Now The two ADHD memory modes: I literally can not recall the words that just came out of my mouth / I can recite the opening paragraph of every single magic tree house book.’

I also want to talk Neurodivergence, as this is another misconception when it comes to ADHD. In the way that Autism, Tourettes, Dyscalculia, Dysgraphia are all forms of neurodivergence, so is ADHD. ADHD is not a behavoural issue, but a neurobiological developmental disorder. ADHD also has many overlapping traits with Autism, (not to be confused as the same, ADHD is not on the spectrum). These include, sensory overwhelm/sensitivity, memory issues, hyperfocus/hyperfixation, interrupting conversation/trouble waiting in turn, issues reading/recognising social cues, stimming, perseveration, (getting ‘stuck’ on or repeating a thought, topic or idea, even if the conversation has moved on), and avoidance/trouble with eye contact.

To be clear, ADHD is not on the spectrum, a distinguishing feature between these neurotypes is the cause of the symptom. For example someone with ADHD may not recognise social cues due to inattention/overwhelm/impulsivity, where as someone with autism may struggle to interpret these social cues.

It is important for ADHD to be recognised as a neurotype, and not a behavoural issue. When discussing ADHD traits with a neurotypical person, the response is often along the lines of ‘well everyone is a little distracted/unmotivated/lazy/forgetful/late sometimes.’ My response to that ‘Would you say that everyone is a bit ‘socially awkward/shy’ sometimes to an autistic person? Or ‘everyone has trouble reading sometimes’ to a dyslexic person?’ I imagine the answer would be no, as it is understood that these traits are a consistent, uncontrollable and debilitating.

The more I have learnt and read about ADHD in the context of neurodivergence, the more I have tried to recognise the ways I hide or detract from my symptoms, by ‘masking’. This has included, taking on certain personas or feeding someone elses assumption about me as ‘the messy one,’ ‘the disorganised one,’ ‘the chaotic one.’ In the past I have almost embraced these stereotypes about myself, as it gave me a sense of identity, a framework with which to see and understand myself. Frustration and anger masked over-stimulation/overwhelm, I was not able to recognise the root of these feelings and I also learnt to fidget/stim in the ‘right’ way. When engaging in small talk with someone I am unfamiliar with, I often resort to mimicing or imitating how I have seen other people interact, speak etc and I am conscious of eye contact, (too much, too little?). I catch myself looking at people/staring too much and am constantly trying to gauge what the right amount is, where else to look, etc. I struggle a lot with taking turns in convesation, as I don’t always know where to interject, or I worry I will forget the thought, this has led me to just stay silent instead in conversations and present myself as serious, or elusive.

That’s really all I have to say for today. I think overall ADHD is far more complex and challenging than it is perceived to be, and these stereotypes are so harmful to people who have it and are trying to navigate not only their symptoms, but a world that is not understanding nor knowledgeable of the limitations and struggles of ADHD or neurodivergence.

I have a lot more to say on all this and will try and write more about this going forward. DM/comment etc if you have any thoughts or criticism of anything I have said. Disclaimer, I am still learning and may make mistakes regarding information, or discussing other neurotypes !

Here are some links you might want to check out if you have/think you have ADHD or you have a friend or family member with ADHD. I also highly, highly recommend the ADHD subreddit!

ADHD explained simply:

https://www.additudemag.com/what-is-adhd-symptoms-causes-treatments/

“ADHD is a developmental impairment of the brain’s executive functions. People with ADHD have trouble with impulse-control, focusing, and organization.

“’Attention deficit’ is, some experts assert, a misleading name. “Attention deregulation” might be a more accurate description since most people with ADHD have more than enough attention — they just can’t harness it in the right direction at the right time with any consistency.”

Comorbidities https://adhd-institute.com/burden-of-adhd/epidemiology/comorbidities/ “The majority of adults with ADHD have a diagnosed or undiagnosed comorbid psychiatric disorder, which can complicate diagnosis and treatment of ADHD.1-3“ ADHD and Autism https://www.spectrumnews.org/features/deep-dive/decoding-overlap-autism-adhd/ “A growing number of genetic studies support the notion of at least some shared causation between autism and ADHD. But imaging studies comparing brain structures and connectivity have yielded a confusing mix of similarities and differences. And some behavioral research has highlighted the possibility that outwardly similar features mask distinct underlying mechanisms. Inattention in a person with autism, for example, might result from sensory overload, and apparent social problems in someone with ADHD may reflect impulsivity. Perseveration https://www.understood.org/en/friends-feelings/common-challenges/self-control/perseveration-adhd-and-learning-differences

“(Kids) who perseverate often say the same thing or behave in the same way over and over again. And they do it past the point where it makes sense or will change anything. It’s like they’re stuck in a loop that they can’t get out of.”

ADHD and social skills https://chadd.org/for-adults/relationships-social-skills/#:~:text=Social%20Skills%20in%20Adults%20with,their%20inattention%2C%20impulsivity%20and%20hyperactivity.

“Social skills are generally acquired through incidental learning: watching people, copying the behavior of others, practicing, and getting feedback. Most people start this process during early childhood. Social skills are practiced and honed by “playing grown-up” and through other childhood activities. The finer points of social interactions are sharpened by observation and peer feedback.

Children with ADHD often miss these details. They may pick up bits and pieces of what is appropriate but lack an overall view of social expectations. Unfortunately, as adults, they often realize “something” is missing but are never quite sure what that “something” may be.”

ADHD and stimming https://www.betterhelp.com/advice/adhd/repetitive-behaviors-in-children-with-adhd-stimming-fidgeting-and-what-these-actions-may-mean/

“Many believe that stimming and fidgeting is reserved for those on the autism spectrum. However, it is now known that children with ADHD are just as likely to use repetitive body movements to self-stimulate. In fact, autistic stimming and non-autistic stimming are different. The main difference is that those with ADHD typically only use stimming for a short period of time while they are trying to concentrate. For example, someone with ADHD may stim for under an hour while those with autism will stim for several hours at a time. While stimming and fidgeting are typically seen as tapping or rocking, there are many other things that children with ADHD do to self-stimulate. There are actually five different variations of stimming, which include olfactory, vestibular, visual, tactile, and auditory.”

#adhd #neurodivergent #neurodiversity

0 notes