#(and then was giving them his money after he died? what a prince!)

[navree]

god grant me the serenity not to vaguepost about a reply to a post about the memery of the ides of march

[violetrainbow412-blog]

Day 30: scary movies

Masterlist flufftober 🎀

The translations of the French sentences are at the end and I give special thanks to @cumulo-stratus for helping me check that they were fine. I hope you like it!

“We're here,” Spencer announced, although that was obvious, when he parked the convertible car that Rossi had very kindly offered to lend to you.

Now that Halloween was so close, the doctor had invited the entire team to the drive-in theater for the broadcast in its original language of Eyes Without a Face, a 1960 French film, but everyone had found an excuse not to attend. Most of them refused due to their ignorance of the language and Emily, who was the only one who spoke it as fluently as Spencer, already had plans that night.

“I can go with you” you had said kindly. In other circumstances you might not have accepted, but now it made you feel guilty leaving your friend alone. In addition, the plans with him were always calm and, to a certain extent, educational "But I warn you that all I know how to say in French is Bonjour”

Your friend was happy with your response and he asked you not to worry, telling you that all you had to do was take it to him so he could translate the words for you. So Rossi told you that he would collaborate on one of his cars and Spencer almost died when he saw it, not because he was a big fan but because he was worried about how much money he would have to pay if he made the slightest scratch on it.

“There are more people than I imagined,” you murmured, nodding toward the rest of the parking lot. The majority were couples, as expected, and a few older adults.

“It was a very popular story during that time, despite the censorship it involved. We once had a similar case in… Well, I'll remind you when we finish watching it. I don't want to ruin anything for you," he murmured, smiling.

That night he had chosen an outfit that was quite common to see him in at the office: brown cardigan, an argyle vest, formal shirt, and tie. Everything was fine with that, what was really driving you crazy lately was the hair. Spencer styled his hair in a certain way that… you couldn't explain it, he just made you think of Prince Charming in fairy tales.

And the fact that you started to see it that way didn't help a damsel like you at all.

“It's okay if you can't translate the entire film. Just telling me a couple of lines is enough, I will be guided by what I see”

“No, that's not a problem. I can do it"

Of course you knew he could do it, it was Doctor fucking Reid. You were just worried that you would end up more focused on his whispering lips than on the screen in front of you.

Luckily the movie started and you managed to maintain the necessary composure. Luckily your brain was able to pay attention to what you saw, what you heard, and what Spencer was murmuring to you. At first you may have only agreed to accompany him out of kindness, but as the story progressed you realized that it was actually good. Little by little you were remembering a case that, as he had said, you had investigated, but that should probably be a talk for after finishing the movie.

You had to admit that something was captivating about the French language, because even if you didn't understand a thing they said, it was nice to hear it.

Calme-toi, ma chérie.

Faites-lui confiance.

One of the characters murmured and a second later you heard Spencer with the respective translation.

“Calm down, my dear. Trust in him”

"Repeat that"

“Calm down, my dear. Trust in him?”

“No,” you murmured, seeing him frown as if he didn’t understand your request. “Repeat what he said, in French.”

The idea had come from God knows where and you had only mentioned it in the heat of the moment, otherwise you would never have asked him. It was just that the words had sounded so exquisite that you wondered if the soft voice of the man next to you would replicate them in the same way.

Spencer wanted to ask you why you wanted that, but he was afraid of ruining his only chance to impress you with his skills, so he just turned enough so you could see him better and mentally visualize the words he needed.

When he leaned a little towards you to have more privacy you felt his breath hit your neck and adding to the soft aroma of his cologne that reached your nose you felt slightly dizzy.

If a single action had been enough to make your entire body shake, it probably would have been hearing Spencer Reid whispering French in your ear.

“Calme-toi, ma chérie. Faites-lui confiance”

“Once again,” you laughed, thankful that the low lighting didn’t allow you to see a blush on your cheeks.

"Why?" he said amused, thinking that perhaps it was prudent to inquire about your request.

“I don't know, when you talk it you sound so…” so sexy “nice. Like feeling velvet between your fingers” 

Spencer was definitely flattered by you, you could tell by the way he chuckled and his body flinched slightly.

“I don't sound that good because I haven't practiced French for a long time, but my mom wants to go to Paris one day so if we go together, I'll be able to do it. I learned it a few years ago, it is a somewhat difficult language”

“Can you say anything else?” you asked excitedly, as you scooted a little further against him to the point where your knee brushed his and your faces were just a short distance away “I mean, of course you can, but could you do it?”

“Huh, what do you want me to tell you?”

“Whatever,” you smiled sweetly. You weren't even paying attention to the movie anymore, which was playing in the background, but you only had eyes for him and his pretty face.

Spencer's face. Your co-worker. 

Despite the inappropriate course that your thoughts had taken, you kept watching him while he thought for a few seconds what he was going to say to satisfy your curiosity. A mischievous smile crossed his face as he tilted his head slightly and you swore it was almost as if he wanted to maneuver his lips to yours.

“Je pense que tu es vraiment belle”

The phrase was just a caress, a feather sliding across your ears that managed to stop your breathing and accelerate your heart rate. Maybe French was called the language of love for a reason.

"What does it mean?" you asked in barely a whisper.

But Spencer didn't respond, he just stared at you and for a second you thought his attention had been diverted to your parted lips.

“Keep watching the movie or you'll miss the best part.”

“Spencer, what does it mean?”

“There he is saying that she can be admitted tomorrow morning.”

“Spencer,” you said sternly. Even with the tone of your voice, he did not look to your side, pretending to be extremely interested in the movie playing, “What did you tell me?” 

“You only wanted to hear me speak in French, you never asked for a translation”

“Reid!” You complained, extending your hand to his arm to get his attention and force him to look at you. “I swear if you offended me…”

“Je ne t'offenserais jamais”

“Stop it,” you threatened him, pointing a finger at him and frowning.

“Si je pouvais, j'effacerais ce visage en colère avec un baiser”

You responded to that with an exasperated sigh and suddenly a scream that you didn't expect on the screen startled you greatly, causing you to instinctively jump into his arms.

It was an absolute, cheap cliché, but that didn't make it any less romantic.

"You see? Pay attention” was all he said, with a tone that showed how much fun he seemed to be having.

You readjusted yourself in your seat without saying anything and obeyed his words, looking at the strange black-and-white scene. Out of the corner of your eye you watched Spencer lick his lips before he started shouting explanations about the story again which you listened to carefully, trying not to think too much about what the two sentences he had told you meant but which would keep you curious for the rest of the night.

Suddenly you felt him stir next to you and raise both arms, as if he wanted to stretch his back, while a yawn left his lips. What really caught your attention was feeling that one of his limbs, the one that was close to you, when getting off was placed on the edge of the seat behind your back and not on his lap as it should be.

“Tell me you didn’t do that.”

"Do what?" he asked, but from the stutter in his voice you knew he knew well what you meant.

“That's the most common tactic on earth,” you muttered between laughs. Spencer lowered his head as if he were embarrassed and ready to take his arm away from you, but you raised your hand until you took his and slid a little so that you were leaning against his body. “But I'll let it go just because you're cute.”

Cute. The word resonated in Spencer's mind and warmed his cheeks, while he felt how you settled your head better on his chest and began to caress the back of his hand with your thumb. You were so soft and warm he felt like he was going to die. 

“Where is my star translator?” he heard you say and that was enough to snap him out of his trance.

You stayed in that position for the rest of the show while he whispered in your ear and you listened to the soft beat of his heart, feeling that, at least for one night, the world belonged only to the two of you.

Translation

"I think you are really beautiful" (Je pense que tu es vraiment belle)

"I would never offend you" (Je ne t'offenserais jamais)

“If I could, I would erase this angry face with a kiss” (Si je pouvais, j'effacerais ce visage en colère avec un baiser)

taglist: @navs-bhat @reidwritings @tricia-shifting14 @spencerslove @vivian-555 @r-3dlips @rhiannonhippiegirl @taygrls @simp4f1 @sdddoobydoobydoo @taintedstranger @missabsey

[confused-wanderer]

thoughts about Bruce nearly adopting the prince of hell itself- Nico di Angelo? bcause there is no register of Nico having a family, he's an orphan for the mortals. And Bruce is always into adopting orphans with a dark past (cmon Nico has a really dark n complicated past)

I love the way you think.

Nico di Angelo already has the brooding, dark and concerningly pale part of being Gotham’s cryptic down. It isn’t his fault that when he accidentally shadow travels while in the underworld and ends up in Gotham, every villain and goddamn person in Gotham has already pegged him as the latest addition to the bat family. It had taken Nico way longer than he’d like to admit to realize he wasn’t in the underworld anymore. In Nico’s defence, when you had dark streets filled with a heaviness in the air, accompanied by darkness and screams everywhere it’s hard to realize you’ve actually ended up on Earth.

The first time Bruce bumps into him is when he sees this kid take down forty assassins in one fell swoop. The kid fights with a sword, but Bruce notes that he relies more on his powers. When the fight is over, Bruce feels the weight of Nico’s gaze on him. He feels the souls of the damned judging him, but the only thing he can focus on is that this kid is scrawny. Concerningly pale, and eye bags so deep they gave Tim a run for his money. And all the pieces clicked: why all the people were suddenly chastising him for not feeding his kid enough, why the villains were crying foul play over him playing favourites when it came to allowing metas in his city, Bruce keeps his eyes peeled, tries to track down the kid because forget seeing him as a threat to Gotham, this kid was a threat to himself with the way he was operating. The next time he meets Nico, he comes prepared with weeks of research that led him to the perfect peace offering: A McDonalds Happy Meal.

Nico’s fight or flight instincts were failing him when Bruce approached, because he had no idea what to do when an intimidating creature appears out of the shadows, walks towards him and basically shoves a meal in his face and asks him where his parents are. But slowly he starts trailing Bruce, asks the ghosts about him and pieces together that he was a mortal famous for brooding and hiding in the shadows..Nico had competition for his title.

Bruce lends him a room in the manor one night after Nico almost passes out, and is slightly scared of how aggressive the man’s kind gestures are. From the way Alfred gives him the side eye when he thinks he’s successful in skipping meals, or the superhuman strength with which Bruce absentmindedly judo-flipped a monster into another dimension when it tried to attack Nico while he was half-asleep. One day after a long nap, Nico hears a lot of animated noises, peeks around the corner and that’s how he sees the rest of the batfam. The next few days even though he tries to avoid him they all somehow find him, curious to see the latest arrival. Jason is informing him of his rights when he becomes a legal ward and all the blackmail and guilt-tripping he is entitled to, while Dick and Barbara try and make him feel comfortable and welcome without preying too much. Something about them keeps nagging Nico, because they seemed so damn familiar he found himself wanting to believe he was safe with them. It’s only after the two have a debate and share an exasperated look that it clicks. Their antics remind him of Percy and Annabeth.

It takes a little getting used to though. The first time Nico and Tim met, everyone else swore they were seeing double. Two anemic kids with more trauma than blood in their body, complete with the eye bags and the pale complexion. The only thing Nico was missing, was a missing spleen. The batfam still mixed up their names from time to time, but Nico wouldn’t admit that he liked it, and sometimes would add fuel to the fire. He liked being the only one who could scare Bruce every single time by beating the man at his own games and appearing out of the shadows. Bruce does still occasionally ask about his parents- half out of curiosity and the other concern and at one point Nico knows enough about their world to know they won’t bat an eye at the truth, so he tells them. His reaction was certainly tame, but the bat kids went crazy when they realised they could have a dance-off with the skeletons.

When Nico finally feels well enough to shadow travel back, that’s when Bruce pops the question. He’s nervous, Nico can tell and that makes him nervous. The same way his dad would feel nervous asking him if he wanted to hang out, or have a movie night. It’s strange, Nico thinks to himself, how two powerful beings that can intimidate the world without saying a word, could turn so scared when facing their own children. Their conversation goes a little something like this:

Bruce: listen.. I know you have a dad. I know you’re not an orphan.. technically. But it’ll be a lot easier and we’ll have less obstacles in our civilian identities for me to help you however or whenever you want. I want you to know.. you have a home here. If you ever need to rest, shelter or help, I want you to know you always have a place to crash. The manor is your home, and I just want you to know that. If you say this name in this universe and ask for me, no matter where you are, I will find you. And I will come to help. And I’m not the only one who will if you have that name.

Nico *struggling to blink back tears*: I-

Bruce *panicking*: Did I say something wrong? I’m sorry it’s completely fine if you don’t want to. Sorry I wasn’t trying to guilt trip you chum I just wanted you to know I-we all care about you and that you’re not alone.

Nico *sniffling*: Thank you..

Skeleton hand *popping out of the ground, hopping over to Bruce and extending out a letter*

Letter: YES.

Bruce: .. what the-

Nico *turning red*: DAD!!

Letter: Love you :) -Dad.

Nico: it’s fine you don’t have to do what he says Br-

Bruce *slams down adoption papers*

[hanjisungslag]

haiii >_< what type of fantasy characters/stererotypes would aot characters be?

- any characters you want but def reiner pls＾ ty baby

🧝‍♀️ aot characters & fantasy

characters included: eren, armin, mikasa, sasha, connie, jean, annie, reiner, bertolt, levi, erwin & hange!!

notes: this was so fun to do omg

✧ eren jaeger - hero gone villain

okay i know this is a bit basic to do… but c’mon!! he’s literally the epitome of ‘i’ve become what i sought out to destroy’ and i just can’t think of him as anything else. he fits the stereotype too well😭.

✧ armin arlert - mage

he is soooo side kick mage, no? tell me you can’t imagine armin (specifically with the mushroom hair) wearing a wizard gown, hat and holding a magical old stick. he doesn’t like to leave his tower often but is usually forced to when something goes amiss - i can imagine him sighing deeply while reluctantly grabbing his magical old stick.

✧ mikasa ackerman - sidekick

bad ass sidekick who lives in the woods & is probably on the run. i’m thinking… arcana muriel vibes for this but less stoic and quiet (and less cursed) but, she definitely learnt to fight in the woods when she was 3 OR taken in by an old, rugged guy whose family died tragically. either way, everyone’s terrified of her but she steals bread for orphans or some heroic shit like that.

✧ jean kirsten - prince

himbo prince😭 i mean this in the BEST way possibly mkay! he’s not really a himbo however… he just gives prince who accidentally got entangled in a weird adventure and he doesn’t know how to live without servants. he’s be like “erm, i am not crossing that muddy river.” BUT THE CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT WOULD BE INSANE by the end, he’d like finally understand how bad the government is or how poor the townspeople are and give them money.

✧ connie springer - the fool

sigh… the fool, the court jester, etc etc. he would be himbo prince jean’s court jester 100% and they’re like actually pretty good friends, they’ve known each other since they were kids. he also gets dragged along with jean on a weird adventure and he would be the comedic relief. (also a shoulder for jean to cry on when he gets mud on his fancy royal shoes).

✧ sasha braus - henchman

hunter/henchman hellooo…? literally expert at using a bow and arrow? grew up in the woods?? she would EAT so hard being a henchman and to make it even better, when someone hires her they don’t know she’s a girl and whenever someone finds out, they’ll be so shocked!! feminism!

✧ reiner braun - the beast

dare i say… some sort of big beast? like a big, fluffy beast but make it sexy, beauty and the beast vibes perhaps. imagine fighting this big and surprisingly attractive who lives under a bridge. IM SORRY THAT WOULD BE SO FUN… i’m thinking like diane from sds vibes too!!

✧ bertolt hoover - squire

young, little boy training to be a knight aka a squire. tell me you cant see this little cutie patootie dressed to the nines in armour, learning how to swing a sword?! maybe him and annie trained together or dare i say, he looks up to her.

✧ annie leonhart - knight

sworn shield to a princess that she falls in love with. imma need someone to write a fanfic about this RIGHT NOW!! we all know annie knows how to whop some ass so, of course she was chosen by the king and queen to protect their precious daughter but what happens when… she falls in love! GAH!! of course, she could never speak of her feelings - maybe one day.

✧ levi ackerman - assassin

leader of some sort of renegade, like a special group of assassins. no matter what universe this man is in, his crown will never fall! his title carries on throughout all possible realties m’kay. same backstory though 100%, raised in the poor ditches but learnt how to fight and now he’s a leader of a renegade! you have to pay big buck to get levi to assassinate someone, he’s the best of the best after all.

✧ erwin smith - commander

i’m sorry to be basic and boring but a commander of an army. HE HAS TO BEEE 😭it’s too perfect, i’m sorry. except imagine the army is all medieval and dripped out in chainmail!

✧ hange zoë - pirate

a pirate. LIKE CMONNN especially s4 hange with the eye patch?! i can totally imagine hange running a ship and sailing the seven seas. they’re literally a commander too? it was written in the stars, they’re perfect for the role! i can totally see them playing devious pranks and tricks on other pirates trying to secure the same treasure.

[kenandeliza]

A Marvel Family Fantasy AU

A few days ago, I randomly dreamt of Drawing Billy and Tawny in a fantasy setting.

Billy was this kid wizard and Tawny was his companion (or an animal to ride on like a horse)

Then it got me thinking, maybe in this setting, Mary could be someone of high status in this fantasy setting (since she's in a rich family in the golden age comics)

I'm inclined to think Freddy would be a captain of a ship for irony-sake but I have a feeling pirates and fantasy settings don't match well?

It's just funny for me to think of him with a peg leg xD

After further discussion with @the-brash-spud :

Warning: Too many text :>

These are the ideas we have so far (if there are quotation marks, those ideas belonged to @the-brash-spud ):

—

Maybe Billy and Mary were prince and princess separated by birth, (i'm not sure if its a kidnapping or the baby got lost on his own) but the wizard founded billy and trained him.

At the ripe age of (insert young age below a teenager's), The wizard decided to grant him the power of shazam to turn him into the world's mightiest Wizard!

Captain Marvel!

Wizard dies and then Billy and Tawny have adventures together, maybe helping people along the way (maybe somehow found out that Mary is his sister :p idk)

“ I think you could go angst if you made the wizard get brutally hurt in a battle to protect Billy and the rock of eternity so in a last ditch effort he transports the rock to its own pocket of existence and then giving Billy powers of shazam because its as ready as he'll be able to make the kid :) and it's his last effort for Billy to be protected even if he has to do so himself because he has failed :)) made Billy cry as Wizard turns into dust in Billy’s hands :)))”

—

Uncle marvel can be a con-man/thief who took pity on Billy or realiz, teaching Billy that the world isn't always honest and he's like, "Billy, don't always give money to the poor on the streets, sometimes they faked their illness to be lazy”

" Billy: "The man in the shadowy corner needs my help."

Uncle: "No, the hell he doesn't!”"

—-

How Billy Met Freddy

Billy probably met Freddy in a bar fight. How did the kid get into a bar?

Billy looked at the man exiting the pub with a bottle.

Billy: Ohh! So this is where you get refreshments here! I wonder If they have enough Milk for Tawny..

Pub sign written NO KIDS ALLOWED!"

*Billy can only read magic scrolls and not regular alphabet*

Cue him meeting Freddy (who's armwrestling with one of the people there)

(Insert Bar fight for some reason because The child decided to drink a white cocktail thinking it was milk and the fact that Billy is a Kid)

“Freddie is definitely that kid having his ass thrown out of the bar/pub/inn”

I'd like to think he and his brother are a team, prolly sailed a ship together.

“Yes, they target slave ships. Unless you wanna go different routes. Then, he is focused on certain nations' flags that have a whole lot of red in them

Also, he goes to the bars just to start bar fights over drunks being mean/nasty to the landlady. The landlady doesn't appreciate it bc now she has a broken table and four broken chairs”

Freddy faces the Captain Nazi equivalent of a pirate [Captain Arian? Like Aryan?] XD, Freddy lost his leg the same way, from his encounter with Captain Arian.

Kit (probably a necromancer or a ghost who's cursed to be bound in the ship Freddy's in, making Freddy more attached to the ship) can still summon crewmembers.

Maybe they both meet mary during the birthday ceremony parade

Maybe Mary snuck off from her family (disguise herself as a regular girl, i know, generic plot) and then meet Billy accidentally

Billy: It's my birthday today!

Mary: What a coincidence! It's mine too!

The-brash-spud: “Billy, in his innocence, thinks ,"There must be something to us sharing birthdays!" While Freddy calls him stupid, Billy tries to get a look at the princes and then cue the lung-fu panda rocket incident, but maybe something else more fitting with Freddy being pulled along”

On an unrelated note, i think Billy knew about Freddy's peg legafter either a pirate slashed it clean and Freddy just used it to bonk his head.

Billy is still screaming from the shock and immediately casted healing spells (i'd like to think everything about billy is lightning based- so yes getting struck by lightning is a healing spell for him :D) Freddy got shocked lmao

And what about boarding Tawny on the ship?

Billy:"Please???"

Freddy: "I'm not letting a tiger into my ship."

Kit who absolutely adores animals: "YES"

Freddy:"NO!”

Kit:" Does he love belly rubs??"

Billy:" yes but you have to ask him politely for his permission-”

Freddy rolled his eyes, realizing he has to clean cat fur everyday off from the furnitures.

___

How did Mary, a royalty tag along with a kid wizard and a pirate?

“Yeah, I guess forced separation would work better. Hell, go with a scenario that will allow them to have Mary with the parents' blessings as long as she's kept safe (she isn't, but that's because she is the danger herself)”

Mary and Billy: "Yay adventure"

Freddy: "Oh great, now I have to take care of two kids and a tiger in my ship!?"

*Freddy looking at Kit and the kids + a tiger playing together, kit seems happy*

Freddy: "...i guess it's alright..”

___

How Freddy and Mary found out about the wizard?

“Hmmmm, maybe Billy takes them to the rock because they were in a pickle, and unforeseen effects happen?

They got surrounded maybe?

Also I can see the aftermath

"You were raised by THE Wizard!? THE Wizard?! A Wizard of legends so often told he is recognisable even if his name was lost?!"

"Oh, his name is Shazam-" *BANG*”

____

Hopefully i could draw these AU ideas, I don't plan on making this into a story, i just like the concept that my dream gave my a few days ago and I’m just expanding it. Sorry for too many text xD

I don't mind if you want to add something to this silly lil AU, It's just a fun thing for me to do :p

[pollsonmorenichetopics]

Disproportionate Retribution Poll Round 1 Side A:

Kaede Akamatsu's (Danganronpa) Disproportionate Retribution:

"(Danganronpa 3 spoilers) She supposedly committed murder. BUT she was put in a situation where if she didn't everyone would die. She also planned to kill the person who put them into the situation where she has to kill. She didn't even mean to my My innocent boy. The Worst Part. SHE DIDNT EVEN DO IT.

Punishment: The most painful death literally ever. OMG what the hell was that why did you do that TO SOMEONE WHO DID NOPT EVEN COMMIT MURDER. Sorry im still mad. Anyways the whole thing is pretty poorly written so it's not even tragic just aggravating."

"She failed at killing someone with her plan, so the mastermind framed her :( She is the person who deserved to be killed the least in all of Danganronpa"

The Snatcher/The Prince's (A Hat In Time) Disproportionate Retribution:

"The Prince went to get flowers for Vanessa, his princess. Vanessa saw him giving the girl selling flowers money, but misinterpreted it in the worst way possible.

So, like a normal person, she imprisoned him in her cellar, chaining him to a wall, where he either died due to starvation or by freezing to death after she froze the whole kingdom over. Not to mention that everyone in the kingdom died due to the freezing thing

So yeah, punishment for being perceived as cheating (which he didn't even do); being imprisoned until he slowly died."

[dangermousie]

I know I keep saying it, but nobody will beat Zhang Ruoyun's portrayal of Fan Xian as performance of 2024 for me. No one.

The way this scene shows his grief and rage and thirst for retribution and loathing of random injustice of the universe?!

What gets me the most here, and I think what really is the extra cruel twist for Fan Xian is that Miss Jin wasn't even targeted because he helped her father and he wanted to have her freed. She wasn't targeted at all. Second Prince's hirelings needed to kill a hooker and picked a hooker at random. It would be awful if she was deliberately killed to punish Fan Xian because he tried to help her father and her. But at least there would be some causality, some "if only I did X differently" there, some control. It would at least give her some importance in her killers' eyes, however perverse - some reason as to why she's the one lying there lifeless. But nope - they had no idea of what she and her father meant to Fan Xian, the injustice he tried to right with them, they just needed a brothel worker to kill and grabbed one at random.

And oh, how bleak. How utterly bleak. Fan Xian tried to help her father redeem her and the old man died. And Fan Xian then had her freed after he got control of things, because that way even if the old man is dead, at least it wasn't in vain, his daughter is free. And now we find out she was never freed because yes she had her papers, she probably had money on top. But as Wang Qinian points out - as a former prostitute with no family where could she go, what could she do for a living? She stayed in the brothel and continued because that was the only way of life she had left.

There was no salvation or happy ending for anyone in the Jin family.

And look at this - look at his monumental rage:

It's pretty gorgeously ironic that when he first got to the capital and saw that stele about all men being equal left by his mother, he said this is a great sentiment but he doesn't have the courage to take on the whole world, he just wants a peaceful life. And yet we watch how he inexorably takes up that mantle without ever having planned to - because he cannot stand aside. He, like his mother, is one person taking on the basics of feudal society. Hopefully unlike her, he emerges alive.

(Honestly, the more this drama goes on, the more it reminds me of Hu Ge's The Myth with which is shares a number of themes. Fan Xian has a lot more plot armor but the desire to bash your head against the wall of history no matter how futile because you cannot live with your conscience otherwise is very much the same.)

And the coda with the second prince - my God!

[a-fluffy-dog24]

Kingdom Pines AU

In a land far away their were two kingdom that hated each other.One of the kingdom was rolled by two twins King Stanley and King StanFord.And Stan adoption his grandchildren, Fords great niece and nephew and go on adventures , were they slay dragons and ride horses. Dipper is in love with a girl with long blonde hair.

If you like the time pirate chapter book you might like this.Also (based on the adoption au make by keleficent and marehami on AO3.It's not associated with the AU but just with a Fantasy coat off paint.And take a lot of Disney Princess movies stuff and Romeo and Juliet,Princess diary's.

Chapter 1. We were the kings and the queens

Once upon a time in the year 1918 off the coast of Middle East this story takes place in early November. It's still autumn, it's colder, the leaves are falling.There were two small kingdoms. One of them was ruled by the The Pines family and the other was ruled by the Northwests, the Northwests richer and their subjects were mean and snotty. So the two kingdoms didn't interact much.

The first kingdom was named Gravity Lands; their castle was gray and blue; it is ruled by two kings who are identical twin brothers. King Stanley wore a red and black robe and a gold crown. He has a girlfriend, an ex wife maybe? named Marilyn  .And King Stanford wore a green and light brown robe and a gold crown. He has a husband named Fiddleford.

"How is the disagreement over money the villagers are having what do you think we should do to stop it" Ford asked "well I don't know I was waiting for them to figure it out but I guess I can ask the Committee what they think" Stan answered. The committee is made up Fiddleford and Marilyn ,Soos and his wife Melody.In the children's room were the twins prince Dipper and princess Mabel. They are both recovering from when they sprain their legs they were trying to climb up a tree. And their Grunkles were to busy giving a Press conference bragging and not paying attention.,They're getting better with medication and resting.

They just turned 12 years old, they are the king Stan's grandkids and king Ford's great niece and nephew . The kings are going to adopt them. They were living in the castle because their parents died in the war 3 weeks ago. In their room their beds were on the opposite side of the room,

Dipper's side the walls were blue, his side had books on the shelves. It was a little messy with clothes and toys on the floor.Dipper was on his bed reading on Mabel's side her walls were purple with drawings on the walls. On her bed were stuffed animals, and toys on the floor she was on her bed knitting a blue sweater.Just then Soos came in. He is the royal helper."Hey dudes, it's bath time, who wants to go first?" he told them, "I will'' Mabel went and took her bath. Both Kings were waiting to help her.

And after her bath they both help dry her off and helped her get on her light purple  nightgown it has a small red bow tied around her waist, she brushed her teeth then, Stan put her on his lap and he brushed her hair ."Grunkle Stan and Grunkle Ford thank you guys for helping me, with my bath" "it was our pleasure" Ford put on her socks they love doing this kind of stuff for their daughter it make them feel like parents "don't mention it sweetie, are you excited to maybe ride horses tomorrow" he asks ."Yes I bet you can't ride"

"That it" he tickles her, she giggles he stopped Ford gave her a piggyback ride and put her on bed "alright bed time", Stan tucked her into bed. "Good night daddy"she yawns "good night pumpkin I love you"he kisses her head "I love you good night my dear"Ford kissed her cheek "good night papa" "case your dreams go take on this whole world but to me you'll away be my little girl " they both to her quietly sing and she falls asleep.

Then King Ford came in to talk to Dipper "may I have a word with you" "ok Grunkle Ford''Ford sat down on his bed."I know we didn't have much luck last week trying to find dragons, and then you children got hurt but let's try again when you healed" "I hope we can. I've never seen a dragon up close before, maybe we can look in the forbidden woods'' Dipper suggested ."NO absolutely not you know the rules no going in the woods by yourself and no going to the Northwests, castle "

"It's time for your bath" Ford added seeing how he has dirt on his legs,arms and face a little. and smells like BO and pee "no I don't need a bath" Dipper interested,"everyone else has had their bath you stink you need one badly" Stan told . Dipper gets out of bed and tries to make a run for it Stan closes the door and Ford picks him up and puts him over his shoulder carrying him. "I'm not a bag of potatoes" he grumbles. After his bath the kings both help dry him off. Dipper brushes his teeth Ford helps the sleepy Dipper, put on his pj's. His pj's were green Dipper sits on Ford's lap and he brushed Dipper's hair.He looks at the green brush

"Is this your brush?" Ford asks, " see how the brush has a lot of brown hair ."No it's Mabel's why do girls shed so much" Dipper asks them "I don't know it will be a mystery" Stan picks him up. "It breaks the scientific laws of nature, " Ford told him.

Then Stan carried Dipper and tucked him into bed "good night goober I love you" Stan kissed him on the head "Grunkle Ford do you think we'll find a dragon tomorrow". "Theirs is a possibility come on time to rest I love you"Ford kissed his son on the head he falls asleep.They both quietly sing"the monster gone we on are own but you're daddy here beautiful beautiful beautiful boy".

The Kings looked at both of their babies sleeping happily and soundly the Kings leave and do some work in the Library then they go to bed.Stanley's bedroom is a red and gold color "Hey there babe" Marilyn  put her hand on Stan's shoulder they kissed and she helped him up they hold hands and go to bed. Ford's room is gold and green he goes to bed where Fiddleford was waiting.

Chapter 2 Long live all the magic we made

The next day the twins ate breakfast feeling 100% better. Mabel went horseback riding with, ladyWendy she is a servant/friend. Mabel rode a palomino pony named Buttercup Mabel is wearing, a purple dress and her hair was in braids. Wendy road a buckskin named spirit, Wendy was wearing a green dress.Stan came to watch them ride around, in the backyard they raced and jumped over stuff. Then after they get off Mabel sits on the ground, and pets her pony she can talk to all animals. "You like being ridden, you think it gives you a purpose" she talks to buttercup.

"What is she saying," Wendy asked."She said she loved our ride today," Mabel told her. They take care of the horses and head back to the castle, "you did great out there pumpkin" Stan congratulated them. "Thank you it was fun" Waddles squeals and walks, inside "Waddles said he wants a treat" she gives her pig his treat. After Stan and Mabel do some painting together she sits on his lap and they have a lot of fun. "I have a crush" she told him "oh what's their name" "her name is April"."That's great you should talk to her at the party tomorrow how could she not love you sweetie" he replied "thanks I had fun with you daddy" she smiles "Aww I did too" he kisses her on cheek.

Dipper sat on the floor of his closet holding a picture of his mother and sister he misses her so much.And he thinks it's stupid but he wants to be held by his beloved mother he tries to be a man but he started crying a little.Marilyn  was waking in the hallway and she heard muffled cries and opened the children room.And finds Dipper crying he looks up at her and hides the picture from her.

She sit down and asks sympathetically "what's the matter kiddo" "I'm ok it's dumb" he sopped  wiped his tears.She sees the picture and says "you miss your parents'' he nodes and begin to bawl his eyes out she picks him up and hugs him in her lap.He knows he has the words best dads him and his sister could ask for and they give good hugs .But he thinks about how he misses being hugged by a mother figure she knows she can't replace his mother.But she knows both children need someone like her. She finds it hard to cope with the loss of her son as well. "It's ok buddy you're cool granny Marilyn  is here" "thank you" he smiles just then they hear Ford calling for Dipper ."Well you better go" he grabs his bag "you two be careful out there" she told him "we will bye".

Ford,Soos and Dipper walk through the woods to find the dragons, they see gnomes,a bottomless pit ,a couple unicorns and an evil triangle. But no dragons they walked up a hill and they found a cave where the Soos made a lantern. They walked further in the cave and it got very dark. But then they see a huge red sleeping dragon"wow its ginormous" Dipper looks amazed, "this is the coolest thing I've ever seen dude" Soos told them then the dragon wakes up Dipper draws his sword. But then it runs towards him King Ford draws his sword "get behind me boy NOW" Dipper listens. Ford points his sword at it then it flies out of the cave, and into the forbidden forest. And breathes fire."dad that was amazing". "Yea let's go home" Ford said worriedly.

They all eat dinner together in the gold and brown dining room.The bowl and silverware are silver colored for dinner they enjoyed chicken stew with a garden salad. That Soos made for them as the chef.Soos and Melody 6 children eat with their mother.They talk and laugh during dinner.After dinner they clean up and then the Kings call over the children and sit them down and explain. That they have been taking care of them for 3 weeks and they would love it if they could make it official. Mabel read it out loud and translated it from Hebrew into English "the legal guardianship of Catherine Green and Michael Pines' children Mason,Alex, Pines and Mabel, Ariel,Pines

will be gifted if signed by StanFord,Frederick Pines and Stanley,Caren,Pines. The custody agreement will be approved if both parties signed ''.Dipper stated happy crying and Mabel stated too they look at the paperwork it already has the king's signatures on it.The twins joyfully signed and hugged their adopted fathers they are over the moon that their son and daughter. Trust them and love them just like they do and always will. They proudly frame and hang the adoption papers above the fireplace.In the living room so everyone in the Castle can see them.

Then kids had their baths, it's raining outside Mabel sat and watched it she is brushing her hair with a fork she heard another princess did it a lot and it worked. So she decided to give it a shot.She put it down and her cheeks soon looked as wet as it was outside raining .

"Dipper I hope mom and dad will be back from their trip soon" she  knew that their parents are dead.They just haven't got the time to reach  out write a letter she thinks.It doesn't feel like they are gone  it seems like they're on a long trip somewhere where they can't see them can't talk to them. She keeps forgetting that they're not here. That they're not coming home.Tears begin to build up in her eyes and make their way down.

"I wish mom and dad were still here", he walked over and she started crying more he hugged her. "Well I wish they were still alive too" he started to cry a little bit and she hugged him tighter. "I remember when we saw they bodies it WAS SO SCARY " she sobbed "it was HORRIBLE THEY WERE COVERED IN BLOOD AND they were...DEAD " she cries more "and they never coming back Dipper" she was staring to breakdown in tears he hug her and said "I know I want dad and mom too badly But we have Grunkle Stan and Grunkle Ford,Soos,uncle FiddleFord,granny Maryland and me, people that love us I love you"

Dipper comforted her. "I love you too Dipping sauce"They hug and dry their eyes, and sit there for a bit then the Kings come to tuck them into bed Mabel crawls into bed. Ford took the warm pink blanket and tucked her in "good night, my dear how are you feeling" "I'm tired good night papa I love you" he kissed her on the head and she fell asleep. Dipper crawls into bed Stan takes the blue blanket and tucked him " are you ok Dippy" Stan asks.

"Yeah I'm ok good night Grunkle Stan " Stan rubs Dipper's head softly and he falls asleep "I love you" he whispers "The kings leave "do you think we're doing this right,it's only been 3 weeks since they lost their parents. And we haven’t been the best caretakers."Stan asks him. Thinking about the kids playing and falling out of the tree."Well that’s is true to some extent but I think this is what they would have wanted for the children to be happy and safe". Ford hugs Stan and they go downstairs. They were fun, great uncles but now they need to be the best parents possible "remember when we were that age we were inseparable" Ford asked him "yea seems like only yesterday we would get in a lot of trouble" Stan chuckled.

"I'm surprised we didn't get hurt or worse we have to look out for each other because there was no else too" Ford added. "Remember when we were 12 mom was still alive and we had no cares in the world I miss it" Stan remember being a kid and having no work no kids no worry ."But look at us now I never thought I would have kids of my own even at 55 years old but now we have two wonderful children"

Ford told him.He and Ford didn't always get along as they became teenagers sometimes would argue with each other over dumb things.And also they're father only planned on having one son to take the throne. And he hated Stanley because he was younger and a troublemaker. He emotionally and physically abused him making him feel worthless.The queen would try to stop him but it wouldn't help she patch up and comfort her son after.He wanted StanFord to be king he thought he would make a good king except he despise his sons love for boys.

He also manipulated Ford in to hide all his feelings and told him he was only going to be king because he was born first no one else would trust a freak like him to rule.Both brothers agreed that neither of them wanted to be king alone. And Frederick had been tormenting their lives for years. So when they turned 18 they kicked Frederick out with the help of their mother the queen. It was her kingdom.And he was banished from the kingdom and if he comes back he will be thrown in the dungeon but he Long dead by now."Yup that's for sure I love those kids I would die for them" Stan replied and with that they both went to bed.

Chapter 3 The night you danced like you knew our lives would Never be the same

The next night everyone is getting ready for the ball the entire kingdom is welcome , everybody has washed up and are putting on fancy clothes. Mabel is wearing a light pink and white, with puffy sleeves ball gown. Her hair is wavy with flowers in it, her silver tiara on top. Marilyn  finishes helping her put the last flowers in her hair. She also has little glass slipper  flats. Dipper is wearing a blue and white shut.And on top of his head is a silver crown, and little black shoes. They had downstairs stairs where they saw Grunkles dressed up. Stan is wearing a black and red shirt.

And a gold crown on top of his gray hair. Ford is wearing a green and white shut. And a gold crown on top of his white and gray hair. "You look great my dear" Ford holds her hand and twirls her around her dress blows around he picks her up and holds her she smiles. "You clean up good when you actually take a bath" Stan teased Dipper Ford chuckles.Dipper sick his tongue out at him.Then all the guests arrive, Fiddleford comes over he is wearing a yellow shut and puts his arm around him and kisses Ford on the lips he blushes.Marilyn  holds Stan's hand she is wearing a purple dress her short White hair has a rose in it. Stan kiss her on cheek she smiles.The family mingle with the guests and the kids eat dinner.

Mabel dances with Wendy and Soos the Kings talk to their subjects, Dipper walks over to the punch bull to get a drink. When he sees a girl with very long blonde hair in one big braid. She was in a purple dress "Hi I'm um I am Prince Dipper of Gravity Lands". "Hi I'm princess Pacifica,it's nice to meet you " then they go outside on the balcony. "I've never been to a ball before. I bet my family could hold a better one ""oh really" he said sarcastically "but we never have or at least I've never seen one I'm always locked up in my tower," she admitted."

"Oh why are you locked up in your tower? '' he asks, '' none of your business dork,"she said as he played and fidgeted, with the roses and cuts himself. "AHH '' he yells in pain as she wraps her hair around his cut. And started singing and her hair started glowing he blush and the cut is healed. "Umm thank you" just then the big grand blue clock in the ballroom strikes 8:00 pm "I have to go now my parents will kill me goodbye " she runs off,"wait when will I see you again" he looks for her but she is gone.

After the ball is over the kids are getting ready for bed Dipper looks out the window at the forbidden forest. Mabel walked over to him "hey I just met this handsome boy, his name is John but I also met my crush she's pretty and her name is April and I don't know who I should ask out" "well that tricky umm ask the one you know more out". "Ok thank you I don't see you that much" "umm can I tell you a secret". "Sure bro bro anything"

"Well I talk to this girl and she is cute and super pretty" he giggles. "Oh somebody's in love" she teased "and she has magic hair but she said she has to leave and I think she is in the forbidden forest". "oh but you know daddy and papa won't ,let you go there or if she is a Northwest,". "I know but I got to do something" just then the kings came to put them to bed."Children I have story to tell you" Ford told them he sat on Mabel's bed the kids crawl on it get comfort. Stan sat in a chair beside them "I will tell you the story of Hansel and Gretel, they're twins like you too" he tells the children.

"I think we've heard this story before when we were little" Dipper complains "you can go to bed if you want" Stan remind he "fine". "Start the story already PLEASE" she begs "once upon a time they're where two twins a brother and a sister they live in the woods in a house with their mother and father. Their parents was having a hard time finding food for the children. The children were hungry" "this when they find the house made of candy that's my favorite part" Mabel interruption him. "Not yet... one day they're father had to cut down some wood so Hansel and Gretel sat by the fire and ate one piece of bread then they fell asleep together."Aww we sometimes do that" Mabel said "yea we do" Dipper agreed. "Anyway.. the twins woke up one morning and were playing in the forest and they saw a house made of candy and cake."

"I want to live there and eat the whole thing" Mabel told them "I bet I can help with that" Stan mentioned. Ford starts the story again a little peeved that he keeps getting interrupted "Okay.. Then the children began eating the house. Then the door opened, and an old woman came out. "Ah, my dear children, come here you must come indoors and stay with me, you will be no trouble." So she took them each by the hand, and led them into her little house. And there they found a meal laid out, of milk and pancakes, with sugar, apples, and nuts. After that she showed them two little beds, and Hansel and Grethel laid themselves down on them, and thought they were in heaven.She was downstairs getting ready an oven she used to eat them."

"How could she eat kids, what's wrong with her?" Mabel said upset "yea that's gross" Dipper agreed ."I know she crazy She was getting the oven ready, then Hansel  gave her a push, so that she went in , and Grethel shut the iron door upon her, and they both ran away, and left the wicked witch to burn miserably.The twins go home to their mother and father live happily together until the end" Ford finishes the story. "Ok it's bedtime" Stan got Mabel under the blanket he tucked her in and gave her stuff dog Wattles sleeps on her bed. And Stan kisses her goodnight Ford rubs her head softly she falls asleep .Dipper gets into bed Ford tucks him in Ford kisses him goodnight.And Stan rubs his head softly he falls asleep the kings closed the door.

Chapter 4 Promise me this That you'll stand by me forever

The next morning There's a knock at the door Soos answer it a older woman with red hair and formally dressed says "good morning sir my name is Kelly I'm am with the BAPP British administration of proper Princess." "Oh ok just a minute mr. Pines there a teacher lady at the door" "huh...what do you mean Soos" "hello your majesty I'm am with the proper princess administration and we want to help you niece to prepare her for Royal duty's".

" Gotcha....but no we don't need your help so you can just tell your king George that.... " "Stanley what's going on here" Ford interrupt them Mabel run up to them and listens.Stan points at Kelly  "She wants to train Mabel to be a better princess" "well I don't know we should think about it and contact you at a later time" Ford jesters for her to leave. " Wait don't go I want to be a proper Princess" "are you sure pumpkin" Stan asked her "yes I do I need to if I'm going rule the kingdom and it could be fun"she replied Kelly said "we start tomorrow 7:00 am" then she left.

Mabel and papa do some kitting she shows him how to kit himself a yellow sweater and he loves it and wears it the rest of the day.Stan went downstairs to get some work done.To Managing the kingdom. Then Ford and her bake some cookies. Fiddleford helps them and she puts a lot in her mouth Ford laughs at his cute daughter. FiddleFord puts the cookies in the jar Ford kisses him on cheek Fiddleford blushed.Then Mabel asks "uncle FiddleFord how did you guys meet" "well honey take a Seat do you want to start darling"FiddleFord asked him.

"I was a young teenager sitting outside under a tree writing I was lonely .I had always wanted to be in a relationship but the person I loved was too shy to talk to me and so was I". "I reckon was too shy to speak to you because you were so handsome" Ford blushed "Aww thank you babe.Anyway if it hadn't been for your daddy we might have never made a move" Stan pushed Ford to talk to him and invited FiddleFord to sit at a little table in the park. For the two of them to fall in love "And bye goalie it worked we had been together for years" FiddleFord looked into his eyes. "I think we will be for years to come right babe" Ford lovingly told him " absolutely darling" they kiss. Meanwhile Dipper sneaks out to the stables

He tells Soos he's going on a quick Trailride "ok dude have fun" Soos was taking care of the horses He rode out to the forbidding forest Dipper was looking around when he saw a tower. He thought this might be it "Pacifica Pacifica let down your hair" he yelled. Then noticed it was locked and he climbed the tower,and when he got to the window he unlocked it.

And out came lots and lots of golden hair. She puts her hair on a bar on top, and slides down "thank you but I don't need help getting down." She brags Dipper grumbles and notices how much hair she has then he slides down. "You have a lot of hair" "I know dork" she says sarcastically "anyway what you want to do now".

They rode around the red yellow and orange woods on a bay appaloosa pony named Dreamer and had a picnic on the grass. "what are your parents names are they as weird as you " she ask "oh umm my parents aren't alive anymore so my great uncles take care of me umm there twins" she got quiet and regretted asking then said "oh I so sorry I wish I knew my parents the king and queen save me when I was two"

"why do they lock you up in your tower" he asks "because they uses my hair and I'm not allowed to leave my mom tell me she much pretty than me that makes me feel upset it hurt when I left my tower that night they were not happy" "oh Pacifica gosh I'm sorry let go back" he doesn't want her to be in even more trouble than she already is. She flipped up his bangs and saw weird dots on his forehead. "What's that, are they zits" "umm it's my birthmark" he bushes "oh so that's why they call you Dipper".

"Yes my real name is Mason"he said embarrassedly "I like Dipper it's unique" "umm thank you" he looked flustered. she moved closer and kissed him on the cheek,"wow you smell nice" he giggled as she bushes at him. Afterwards he returned her to her tower, said goodbye and rode home.They do this for a few weeks without getting caught.

Chapter 5 How the kingdom lights shined just for me and you

Kelly getting her things together in the living room to teach Mabel. A giant rulebook,heels, a brush. "Ok dude I'm ready to get this party started" Mabel excitedly yelled "first off a princess should never yell unless there is a frog in her hair" she told her. "I kiss a frog once" she added Kelly Roll her eyes "anyway you should speak well and what on earth are you wearing" she was talking about her faded blue and brown dress. "Oh this is my play dress so I don't get my other dresses dirty I kind of like it"she gave Mabel a White dress to change into.

After that she fix her hair into a giant bun on her head.And some makeup "You put the tiara on" she tells her Mabel dose then it falls on the floor "I'm sorry". Then she has walk in hi heels she takes her first step forward then a few more. "Very good almost there" she fall Face first on ground they move on to tea party " finally something I'm good at" Mabel takes sip of tea and a bite of cupcake "mmm that was good" then she burps loudly. " That was a good one .... I mean Excuse me" she blushes Kelly looks frustrated.

"The most important thing that you must do is to be perfect. That means not yelling,waking to heels correctly,you have to know everything about your kingdom how to run it properly you subject look up they expect you to be calm and in control. And you have be quiet and very feminine. Let's Resume later maybe your have better luck" with that she left.

The next day the kings go to wake up the kids and see that their noses are a little red."Are you ok sweetie" Stan pats her head "AHH-OWOW" Dipper sneezes " Aww you sneezes like a kitten".She coughs every time one sneezes the other coughs, Ford makes a call for some help. Stan puts his hand on her forehead and she warm then he puts his hand on Dipper's forehead and his warm too.Soos comes with a thermometer, medicine, breakfast and tissues.

"Open your mouth please" Ford put the thermometer in Mabel's mouth it’s 108f "look like a fever" .Stan handed Dipper some juice he drank it ,Ford walked over to Dipper bed and took his thermometer. And he had a fever too Stan give Mabel her medicine "here you go pumpkin" she drink it,

"do you want some pancakes"he ask "no"she replied Ford gave Dipper he medicine"drink please"."This is disgusting'' he moans Mabel coughs Dipper sneezes Mabel starts shivering Stan take another blanket and wrappers it around her and rub her and she warm up she smiles at him he softly rub her head Ford opened a window a little bit to let the cool, air in and sick air out then Stan tucked Dipper into bed. "You kids get some sleep '' he said. "Call us if you need anything" Ford says "feel better soon dudes" Soos added.They go downstairs to let them sleep. Later they feed them matzo ball soup and medicine. They go back to sleep, then after dinner they give them their warm baths to help with their colds .That night the Dads go to cheek in on they're children they are sleeping. They look worse than before and paler. Ford feels Mabel's forehead and

she burning up she whimpers "Soos get me a cold washcloth PLEASE and get two just in case ".She starts having chills Ford take her blanket and tucks her in.Stan moves Dipper over to her bed he feels burning hot he looks worriedly at Stan. He puts the cold washcloth on his head Ford tucks him in Dipper close his eyes Ford carefully climbs into their bed and puts Dipper on his lap and runs his 6 fingers through Dipper's hair Stan puts Mabel in his lap and put the wet washcloth on her head Ford looks worriedly at his daughter and holds her hand .Stan rubs her hair softly she gave him a small smile they"then she slept.They stay in the whole night there and watch their babies they both to make sure they are ok they are worried something will go wrong.

They remember the night they were born when they thought something might go wrong.Dipper had a hard time breathing. He was turning blue after he was born. That was the first time he scared them and his parents. But the doctor saved him and after their mother got to hold her newborn twins then Stan held Mabel she wrapped her hand around his finger and Ford held Dipper he grabbed Ford's shirt they then they swapped them and held the other babies were so small and helpless.Just like the children are now they don't have their parents to protect them. But now they have their adopted daddys to take care of them. They are very worried they will lose their babies.

But little by little more medicine,sleep and soup the kids get better. And their dads are right there to take care of them and soon they are no longer sick. And they can get back to doing fun stuff.

Chapter 6 I had the time of my life fighting dragons with you

Mabel was in Stan's bed room him and Ford were having a conversation about the Princess training. "Guys I just don't want to do it again because it's not me how a dress or act and it's a pressure on how the kingdom sees me" she told them as she played with her hair. "Well we understand" Ford comforted her "don't ever let anyone ever change you my dear." Stan tells her "Sweetie don't worry about the kingdom you'll have your brother to help you and your already perfect princess to me." She hugs him.

Later the Pines,Soos and Melody ,Wendy and Fiddleford and Marilyn  were in the forest Mabel had found unicorns, pegasus and earth ponies. And she was having a lovely conversation over a tea party. The boys didn't mind being at a tea party . Stan and Marilyn  sat down next to each other and cuddle a little.Mabel was wearing a yellow ball dress and Wendy was putting a bow in Mabel's hair, her and Wendy were talking about horses,dresses and girl stuff.

Dipper was wearing a dark blue, White suit and brown pants . Later the kids climbed up a small cliff Dipper made it to the top first, Mabel got their last she tried to pull herself up but started falling down, Dipper quickly grabbed her hand and pulled her up. "Thank brother" she said "you're welcome little sister" he teases her "by 5 minutes that's what mom said" she reminds him he smiles.

They could see the top of their dads gray hair and Soos too after they went back to the castle. They sit down on the couch Mabel in Stan's lap he snuggles her and Dipper in Ford's lap he cuddles him "Grunkle Stan who was the king and queen before you guys" she asked.

"Well your great grandma was the queen before us. She was the oldest of 6 sisters. She passed away when you two were born."Stan answered. "Yes I believe she in her early 50s when she passed The passing down of power goes to twins usually.Your father my nephew didn't want to be king"Ford explained

"And he and your mom were in the military so he can't be king" Stan told them. The kids started to feel sad. Their eyes filled with sadness, they remember being in the war zone  after they had passed and their bodies bloody lying on the ground with bullet holes in them the kids remember crying and sobbing. The kings were there hugging them. Those first few days were the hardest. It is so tragic that they were only 29 and 30 years old.Ford rubs Dipper's back slowly Stan cuddles Mabel to help her "we sorry if we made you feel sad" Ford looked at both of them. "We know you kids are very sad losing your parents."Stan tries to comfort them "and we know we will never replace your mother and father but we love you so much"Ford added.

"It's okay to cry if you want"Stan reassured them "I want my MOMMY AND DADDY" she sobbed "me too it's not fair if someone was there...maybe " he let the tears fall. "I know it's not Dippy" Stan rubbed Dipper's cheek to comfort his son "I miss daddy would get my flowers" she sniffled "I really miss Mommy she brushed. My hair and she......was caring and there was no one else that could replace her ." Tears build up in her eyes and run down "I WISH SHE WAS HERE " she yelled.

"I I miss......Dadddy a lot he was the only one who understood me if I was there I could've done something" he try to wipe his tears away but they just kept coming "There was nothing you could've done, it's a horrible situation my boy" Ford hugged him but that wasn't helping "why did they have to KILL HER AND NOW SHE GONE" he yelled sobbing in anger . His yelling scared Mabel a little bit and she started crying more . "It's okay sweetie I know they love you I lot I'm sorry you both have to go through this "he let her keep crying to get it.

Out he holds her close and rubs her and because he's trying hard not too breakdown in tears as well.He lost his son and his beloved daughter in law it hurts him as much as it hurts them.But he holds it together for the children ."It really isn't fair I wish no child had to go through this specially you children" Ford comforted and held the crying boy.A few minutes passed .

They both give turns giving the twins kisses on the head and they comfort their babies for a while.And talk about the good things they remember about their parents.The king's know that the hole left by their parents wasn't ever going to be filled.And the children will probably never not be sad and frustrated at the loss. But the best thing to do is to not forget and talk about and work through the pain together as a family.And they take a little nap together Fiddleford see them and take a blanket and tucked them in he runs his hand though Ford's hair lovely Ford smile in his sleep then the kings cuddled and snuggled the children .

Later they receive a letter from the Northwest that they need to come over to their castle immediately to have a meeting. So the Pines got in the pumpkin carriage and rood off.They walked in and sat down in the living room. "Have the children go play in the other room. Well, we talk" Preston told them "and tell Pacifica she is awful at the piano and make her stop playing that horrible noise" Priscilla tells them as the kids went into the ballroom. And they see Pacifica in a pink dress, with her very long hair playing on the piano.She is not the best but she is not bad at it.

"Oh Dipper what are you doing here you didn't tell me you have a sister" "I'm his twin sister my name is Mabel are parents are, talking" ""can we play with you" he ask. "Sure dork lets dance" Pacifica got off the bench and grabbed Dipper's hand. Mabel started playing the piano. She is wearing a yellow dress and a yellow bow in her hair, she started slinging "tale as old as time, true as it can be barely even friends. Then somebody bends unexpectedly" Pacifica and Dipper dance slow and close

"just a little change,small to say the least". She lays her head on his shoulder, he blushes "both a little, scared neither one prepared" he twirls her around "beauty and the beast". Then he kissed her and she blushed when they sat down.The doors few open the parents were arguing "why are we here" Ford asked “because you're grandson Mason has been dating my daughter"Preston yelled

"And what that's crazy" Stan yelled. "Is that true that you disobeyed us?" Ford asked. "Well yes it is, we've been, hanging out" Dipper admitted ."you went to no the Northwests, castle alone"Stan yelled "there's a reason you don't talk to the king and queen were trying to protect you"Fold told him "I'm sorry I know that was wrong I just started talking to her and I feel bad I want to help her I love her" Dipper apologize . "It was my idea to keep sneaking out so he would stop using my hair" Pacifica told them.

Chapter 7 One day, we will be remembered

Pression angry, stopped over"Pacifica Northwest you are no longer the princess of this kingdom and, you shall no longer exist"Pression yelled. "I wish we never adopted you little rat" Priscilla added.He draws his sword and tries to kill her but Dipper stepped in the way of the sword, and it cut half of her hair and the rest disappeared. But the sword also stabbed Dipper's side, making a small wound.

He tried not to cry but he fell to the ground. Pacifica cried and held him. Everyone ran over Mabel hugged the other side of him, she looked at Stan and Ford she yelled "DADDY,PAPA please don't let him die too" she sobbed "is there a doctor in the castle" Ford yelled. "It's okay daddy here" he ran over to her and rubbed her back "This is all your fault he's hurt"Stan shouted back at Pression Ford took a piece of his shut, and tied it tightly around Dipper's wound.

Worried that he might lose his son he tries to keep Dipper calm and try to think of what else to help "We need to get him some help" Stan said worriedly as he was getting ready to pick him up he already lost his son he wasn't going to lose his grandson either. "Daddy please help me"Dipper started to cry Stan not sure what else to he sang to him "the monster gone we on our own but you're daddy here" Stan held hand and rubbed it gently.Ford joined in "beautiful beautiful beautiful boy" he ran 6 fingers through his hair.

Then Mabel hugged him more and tried to use her magic and love for her brother to heal him. A few minutes later he whispered "hey it doesn't hurt any more". "Oh thank goodness"Pacifca hugged him, Stan removed part of Dipper shut and there's nothing left but a small stair. The kings take Pacifica and the twins home. Dipper's stair felt sore the next couple of days,

Pacifica lives with them. She has her own room near Soos and his wife Melody's room. Her room is purple and enjoys her life. She can't use her magic hair anymore but she loves the new freedom she has. She spends a lot of time with Soos and Melody’s 6 other children. And he grows a Bond with her.They takes care of her and helps her with schoolwork.They are they're for her when she has a nightmare and comfort her back to sleep.Then Soos and Melody offers to adopt her Pacifica agrees and she gets a loving mom and dad .

Pacifica talks with Wendy and plays games with Mabel and Dipper. She never had the chance to be a kid but she has never been happier.Dipper and her do still love each other but now they'll never be separated.They can't wait until they are older and how much stronger their relationship will be.

Stan and Ford helped the children with school and taught them how to run the Kingdom a little bit. They also try to make every day fun for their children and let them enjoy being kids for as long as possible.They all celebrate their first Hanukkah as a family and they enjoy it very much.And the fathers try to keep twins from getting hurt physically and mentally they try their hardest.Mabel asks out the girl she likes and they date from a few months. But they release that feeling that is different now and they are growing in different ways and they decide to break up.Mabel takes a break and makes some new friends. Discover a new hobby.Then when she is a little bit older she tries again with a sweet boy named Charlie.

Dipper and Pacifica grow closer. Stan and Ford try their best to raise their son and daughter. They do a pretty good job. They have help from Fiddleford ,Maryland. They feel happy they were chosen to take care of the children. They feel glad they saved that girl from her abusive parents. And no matter what they would always have each other as a family.The boys have a handful raising two teenagers it's hard sometimes and the fathers don't agree with the kids.But the twins love their fathers they are the best parents they could've asked for.

And when they were all grown up, they had children of their own Dipper and Pacifica had fraternal blonde hair twins one boy one girl .Mabel marries Charlie and they adopted siblings one with black hair and one with dark red hair a 7 years old boy and a little baby boy.Together and all 4 of them ruled the kingdom together.The End.

[devilfic]

❝hard-knock life❞

plot: even with the riddler locked away in arkham, his followers manage to haunt bruce to this day. thankfully, you’re more than willing to help your fiancé tie up all his loose ends... even if they are a bit ridiculous. or four times the riddler’s followers make a threat on bruce’s life and the one time alfred shoots them for it. pairing: battinson!bruce wayne x gn!reader. cw: humor, fluff, established relationship, you and bruce are engaged, I use “fiancé” gender-neutrally, generally silly but some angst, serious but cartoonishly awful attempts at violence, guns, excessive use of the word “goon”, based off this post by @emma-d-klutz​. words: 3.5k.

a/n: I just can’t stop thinking about this post

Bruce figures he could look a little more concerned right now.

One goon holds a phone up to his face—so that he can see himself on screen—while two more have his arms arrested in their grip. The comments on the live stream are moving too fast, but he imagines they’re not worth reading.

The goon holding the phone laughs through his mask, clearly amused by Bruce’s lack of emotion, “Look at the little Gotham prince trying to put on a brave face. Won’t be so brave in a minute now, will you?” 

Bruce assumes they’re referring to their comrade in arms a few feet away, readying a pistol, but he can’t look long; he feels a harsh kick to the backs of his knees and he kneels against the gravel. This close to the docks, they could dispose of his body in the river after his swift execution. Was it weird to be offended by their choice? He was kind of offended. Almost as offended as he was when he’d figured out their plan two days ago.

“I can offer you money,” Bruce recites, your idea, unenthusiastically, “anything. Anything you want.”

The goons laugh. The one holding the pistol steps forward and places the barrel against Bruce’s temple. “Anything we want, huh? Why don’t you tell our audience how you should’ve just died when the Riddler gave you a chance? What a glorious death you would have had.”

Bruce wants to tell them that it’s not exactly his fault Edward didn’t make sure he was home before trying to kill him. He imagined that would just anger them more. Bruce takes a deep breath.

The safety on the gun clicks off when a heavy fog starts crawling toward them from beneath a nearby dumpster. Some of the goons exclaim in confusion and the executioner points toward the smoke.

“What the fuck is that?” The cameraman yells, turning to film the steadily approaching fog. It’s thick and moving quickly, starting to crowd around the Riddler’s followers like a dramatic omen. It isn’t long before Bruce can’t see a foot in front of him. His arms flex, waiting for the telltale sound of his namesake.

A sudden chorus of chirping overhead has Bruce ducking, the trigger-happy goon shooting off into the sky as black wings speckle the fog. 

The two holding Bruce still are suddenly forced off of him. There’s the sound of violent fighting in the midst of the fog but Bruce is more focused on the shooter, his position given away only by the bullets he shoots off with reckless abandon. Mapping his position on the docks, Bruce takes a violent leap forward and feels himself collide into him, dragging his much smaller body forward and forward and forward until-

Splash!

Bruce can’t see it through the fog, but he hears the goon hit the railing and fall into the river below soon after.

“Shit, shit, shit! We’ve been ambushed!” The one filming is the last one standing. He scrambles nearby, trying to find an escape. Within the fog, a dark figure approaches him, and Bruce can just make out the sound of their opponent’s nose getting crushed by the weight of the attacker’s palm. The phone falls out of the goon’s hand when he collapses, unconscious. 

Shortly after, the wind carries away the remaining fog and Bruce walks into the clear night where he sees you perched behind the dumpster, giving him a thumbs up over the machine that sputters out white haze. “Did we do it?” You ask, giddy. 

Alfred walks out of the fog next. It was a miracle Alfred could even see in the Batsuit. It dwarfed him. “I believe we did. Are you alright, Master Bruce?”

“Alright” was a stretch for what tonight’s events had done to his mood, though he’s thankful he doesn’t have a bullet-sized hole where his oncoming migraine should be. Bruce is just happy to have pulled this off in the first place. “Peachy,” he grits through his teeth, “is the stream still going?”

Alfred hums, wiping some of the goon’s blood off his knuckles, “No, I think enough has been seen tonight. The GCPD will be on their way shortly.”

That was a relief. Their theatrics weren’t all for nothing. With luck, tonight’s failed execution would serve as a warning to the Riddler’s remaining followers: Bruce Wayne was untouchable, and any attempt on his life would result in the same fate. Maybe now they’d stop trying to kidnap him off the street.

They, in fact, did not stop.

Alfred had taken the necessary precautions to ensure Bruce did not die in the following days after the docks incident, and with the added threat of paparazzi flooding the tower, Bruce was confined inside until further notice. As far as anyone was concerned, Bruce Wayne was taking some vacation time after a “harrowing” threat on his life. It only made sense. No business engagements for two weeks, at least.

This vacation was, of course, not for the Batman.

Bruce had a wedding to be planning for God’s sake, and yet here he was, perched in the shadows, watching as five squirrelly idiots set up shop across from Wayne Tower... to snipe him, they’d said online.

This was the other downside of the Riddler’s fans gunning for revenge on the Batman: Bruce had to spend ungodly hours on their forums combing for new threats on his life. Most of them were half-baked plans too big to pull off, but the few that weren’t were constantly on his radar.

It wasn’t that Bruce was afraid for his own life, though. He was afraid for yours. The Batman could walk off a bullet wound and Bruce Wayne had fortified his body against most attacks. You, on the other hand, were painfully mortal. One well-aimed shot from a sniper rifle and he’d lose you.

“Looking awfully severe tonight, Mr. Wayne.”

Bruce cracks a half-smile when your voice crackles to life in his ear, right on cue. You must’ve been getting into position. Bruce makes sure his voice is low enough that the goons can’t hear him from his perch. “You don’t have to do this, you know.”

You really, really didn’t. He could easily wipe out these five on his own with only a few injuries sustained, but you had worried over the guns and convinced him he’d need all the help he could get. Even if it was just a measly distraction, “Don’t worry. Batman will protect me.” You sing.

Your shadow passes a window and one of the goons lines up a shot for you. He propels himself down onto the sniper’s back, knocking him out cold.

There’s considerably fewer goons tonight than there were upon his kidnapping, which Bruce finds amusing. Maybe he could get a few hours of patrol in after thwarting this second attempt on his life. Maybe you’d still be awake by the time he got home, and he could pull you away from poring over wedding plans to celebrate a job well done-

Away in his own mind, he isn’t prepared for the butt of a rifle cracking up against the cowl. In the time it had taken him to run away with his thoughts, he’d downed four of them already. He slowly turns. No hurry.

The goon flinches back, eyes wide behind the non-prescription frames slipping off his nose. If Bruce’s ears weren’t still ringing from the hit, he might have went for the temple and called it a night. But again, no hurry.

Bruce grapples the man by the front of his coat and dangles him over the ledge of the building. Softly, he hears you gasp over the comm line, “You’re not gonna drop him, are you?”

Instead of answering you, Bruce gives the goon a good shake, “This won’t end well for you.”

The goon is shivering in Bruce’s grasp, clutching onto his wrist for dear life, swatting at air to get leverage. Bruce extends his arm out further and two voices exclaim this time. “Y-You betrayed him! You betrayed the Riddler!” The voice that comes out of the man is squeaky, almost young. Bruce frowns. “The Waynes will pay for what they’ve done to Gotham!”

“Are those your words or his?”

He falters some, unsure, and obviously it isn’t Bruce’s job to play therapist. He doesn’t know what this kid is getting out of working for the Riddler, what lies he’s been fed. All he knows is that someone had pointed a gun at his fiancé and tonight could have gone very differently if he hadn’t been ready.

But this kid wasn’t the one holding the gun. “I’m giving you a warning: leave the Waynes alone,” Bruce drags him close enough for their eyes to meet, “there won’t be a second warning.”

The goon all but scrambles onto his feet the second Bruce drops him back onto solid ground, having only that second to gather his bearings before Bruce brings his fist down onto his head, knocking him out with the rest of his friends. Tying their wrists behind their backs is quick work, as is piling their worrying amount of weaponry far, far from reach. One quick request to Gordon for cleanup is the icing on the cake.

Bruce is scaling his way down the building when you chime in once more, “You alright, handsome? I hope these guys aren’t getting to you.”

Getting to him was an overstatement. They had to pose an actual threat to get to him, “I wasn’t going to drop him.”

“You were thinking about it, but you would’ve caught him right after. Are you heading out for patrol?”

His lip twitch is the only sign of argument against you because you unfortunately know him well. Bruce slips into the shadow of an alleyway, scanning the street for any other surprises. “Maybe... maybe later. I’m heading back to the tower.”

He hears you make a little noise on the other end, watches your figure outlined in the glass by the lamplight. It’s dark out and you’re high up, but somehow, he feels like you find him down there anyway, “You better take off that suit before you track gutter water through my house, Mr. Wayne.”

Bruce can’t help it. He laughs, “I thought you liked it when the suit stays on.”

You had made it a priority, if you were to marry Bruce, that he make time for date night.

Obviously, with being the CEO of Wayne Enterprises and Batman, you didn’t expect him to always have time to spare. That was the compromise you’d made long before he’d gotten down on one knee. However, for his sake (”-and the sake of Gotham!” you’d added, just to be safe), break time was a must. An hour at least, maybe two if you were lucky. He didn’t even have to spend it conscious. You’d spent plenty a night with his head on your chest and your fingers carding through his hair, reading a book or telling him about your day.

Tonight would have been the same had you not convinced him to come out in disguises. With a little prompting, you two had had a great night on the town. You’d all but forgotten the hectic past week.

And then you both had walked into the penthouse, giggling through the front door, only to find Alfred lugging a dead body across the living room floor. “He’s not dead.” Alfred assured. A body, then.

Bruce rushes in front of you, “Jesus, Alfred. What happened?”

The butler looks far too nonchalant for the scene, but you do notice the lack of a blood trail.

“I was making tea. Enjoying a quiet night to myself, I was, when I heard glass shatter from the other room. Lo and behold, I find one of these Riddler clowns climbing through the window.”

“Sixty floors off the ground? How’d he even make it?” Your voice is riddled with wonder. Climbing gear attached to the corpse- body shows a considerable effort. You notice as well, after a moment of disbelief, that there’s a barely concealed handgun sticking out of Alfred’s waistband. In all your time living here, you’d never seen a weapon like that in the Wayne household. Bruce’s hatred of guns had made sure of that. “Did you shoot him, Alfred?”

Bruce tenses up too, then bristles when he sees what you’re looking at. Alfred even looks a little sheepish and drops the body altogether to hide it. “You shot him?”

Alfred gulps, “Yes... with a rubber bullet, not a real one.”

“And you do that often? Shoot people?”

“Of course not, Bruce.”

“So you just happened to have a gun on you-”

“Someone was breaking in!”

“-while you were making tea-”

“And the gun is not real.”

“-I can’t imagine what else you’ve got hidden away in this house. What, am I going to find a grenade in the coffee grinder tomorrow morning?”

You inch yourself closer to the incapacitated man on the ground, the bridge of his clear frames caved in on themselves. You can see a worrisome bruise between his eyes. Just to be safe, you check the man’s pulse to confirm that Alfred really hadn’t killed him. Sure enough, he hadn’t lied, but brain damage wasn’t entirely off the table yet.

Alfred scoffs, folding his arms over his ruffled vest, “I don’t use bloody grenades. And I haven’t shot a real bullet in years! Most of the guns I own are entirely non-lethal.”

“Most? How many do you have?” Bruce accuses.

A moment passes. “You’ll never find them all.”

The bickering continues at an even louder volume after that. Bruce is furious that Alfred never told him about the guns and Alfred, the military-bred man that he is, was struggling hard not to just say that he was a grown man who could do what he wanted and be done with it.

As (oddly) endearing as it was to see the father and son bickering, you couldn’t let Alfred get in trouble on your watch.

“Um, Bruce,” you interject, catching both of the men’s attention, “to be fair to Alfred, this guy was carrying a real gun with real bullets. If Alfred didn’t have his weapon, this could’ve gone way worse. He saved the day.”

Alfred, as smug as an English gentleman could be, turned his attention back to Bruce.

The news had slowly but surely sobered Bruce up. One more look at the goon on the floor had dried up all the frustration, leaving him thoroughly exhausted, “...he didn’t hurt you, did he?”

“The shattered window is unfortunate, but I can call the repairmen in the morning. I trust you two have nothing as exciting to report.” A shared look between yourself and Bruce has Alfred nodding, discussion supposedly ended. “Very well. Then I shall retire for the night. Unless you’d like to raid my belongings for suspiciously sharp pencils... Master Bruce?”

All the fire in him had been extinguished. Bruce shakes his head and Alfred makes his leave, “What about the guy?” He yells after the retreating butler.

Alfred’s bedroom door shuts shortly after. It appeared date night had officially come to a close.

Bruce had been vehemently against a police detail for himself. It was you and Alfred that really needed it, he’d insisted, but Lieutenant Gordon had a brain that worked like anyone else’s and understood that the man with the hit on him needed it most. And so, much to his chagrin, he’d been hunkered down in Wayne Tower for the last few days, sneaking out as the Bat only when absolutely sure he wouldn’t get caught.

As his future spouse-to-be, you were the one who had to cover for him. But sometimes, no amount of lying could account for his missing presence in the penthouse, and so the Bat had to be put on the back burner until further notice... and it was driving him insane.

The police were in the kitchen, in his study, outside your shared bedroom, and on every floor of Wayne Tower. The media was still abuzz of the latest failed assassination attempt. There were too many eyes on him, it was making him itch.

That’s why, on the rare occasion that you could both pull it off, you helped him into the terminus elevator, helped hide his hair beneath his hat and hood, and sent him off on his bike before any one could question where you and Bruce had gotten off to. Pre-newlywed stuff. It was the honeymoon before the honeymoon, Alfred had joked once.

And of course, the one time you could get him out of the house successfully, he gets kidnapped.

It’s embarrassing standing next to Alfred as the police detail watches the news feed on the living room TV. Bruce was tied to a chair in the middle of the frame, three goons including the cameraman huddled around him and attempting to get a rise out of him. Threats that he’d heard a thousand times over had become stale at this point. Left out too long. If you weren’t so ashamed that you’d unwittingly helped him get kidnapped again, you’d be laughing at the unimpressed look he was giving the camera.

The bright side was that one, they seemed to not have found his suit and two, the goons had dwindled even more in number. Perhaps they were finally giving up?

“Citizens of Gotham, Bruce Wayne has been a hard man to get in touch with. But that doesn’t matter: the Riddler’s righteous justice will be delivered this day!” The cameraman declares, poking Bruce’s chest with a baton. Bruce barely moves. The cameraman sounds as put off by this as you feel, “Uh... any last words, Wayne?”

One of the officers is furiously working with a dispatcher to locate where the video is broadcasting from. Another in the corner is snickering behind her coffee cup. You’re not sure why you relate to them both.

Your future husband looks so done with the situation that you’re reassured he’s in no real danger, but you can’t fathom why he let himself get caught if that was the case. Surely, he would’ve taken them out just fine on his own. There were only three of them.

Another goon nudges his head with the barrel of his gun, yet Bruce does not flinch, “Speak up! The world is watching!”

Wordlessly, Bruce shifts in his seat once, twice, and brings his once bound hands to his front completely freed. You swore you heard a collective gasp across the nation.

The men in the room with Bruce look just as shocked as he reaches for the gun aiming (wobbling) at his head and gently covers the barrel of it with his palm, weaseling it out of the goon’s hand. The magazine falls to the floor shortly after and the gun is discarded across the room. When Bruce approaches the cameraman, the camera jerks back.

The phone is yanked away by Bruce. Before the live shuts off, you hear him speak for the first and only time since the broadcast started, “This is getting embarrassing.”

An uneasy quiet settles over the room after that. When Bruce comes home later that evening, escorted in a cop car, he looks absolutely pitiful. Your open arms are more than appreciated.

It’s been a long few weeks.

Wayne Enterprises was in a tizzy trying to get media under control. First the police, then the paparazzi, and now it felt like he’d gone from slipping from place to place unnoticed to being the talk of the town. It had made being Batman significantly harder, but it had also made him significantly more irritable.

Between you and... well, you, the only thing keeping him sane was currently asleep upstairs. After the last kidnapping debacle, it seemed that all the Riddler’s followers had been scared off, so at the very least, the police presence had dwindled down to a select few. He’d been given the go-ahead to take his own trash out, even. Promised he just needed some fresh air. A few hundred dollars thrown the night guard’s way and he was standing out in the cold at the back of Wayne Tower, in just a “I survived my trip to Gotham!” t-shirt and a pair of boxers, holding a trash bag.

The one Riddler clone standing across from him almost looks too afraid to stumble out of the shadows and recite their spiel. He’d be too tired to listen, anyway.

“Go home,” Bruce grumbles, tossing the bag into the dumpster, making no effort to try to appear like more of a threat than he really was. He didn’t even have mace on him, “I won’t even mention it.”

The stalker waits in the shadows for a few beats, practically shaking, unsure of himself. Bruce stares, unblinking. At the very least, if he took too long coming back up, they’d probably send someone down to check on him. This guy had a chance to get at least one shot off if he wanted. Bruce had survived three at one time, once.

After the world’s most unimpressive standoff, the goon turns around and starts walking home.

It’s been a long few weeks.

taglist: @yikes-buddy​ @alexxavicry​ @moonlightreader649​

[cookies-and-music]

The Scam of a Lifetime.

Aleksander was tired.

Centuries of feigned deaths and new identities had worn him down.

Every day, upon waking, his mind chose a reason why existence was no longer bearable, and he spent the day brooding over it.

That day, it was about the King. Each time the king died, Aleksander had to gain the trust of the new one, prove his worth, and bow to people he could crush with a fingertip.

It had to end.

And it would end with her.

He approached her after the show. In centuries, Aleksander had seen many good actors, but none as skilled as the girl before him. Anya was young, around 16, with brown hair and light eyes. The only thing special about her was the uncanny resemblance to the Queen. It seemed that fate had spared him.

'Let's see if I understand, General Krignan.'

'Kirigan,' he corrected.

'Kirigan,' she echoed. 'Are you telling me that there existed a second daughter of the tsars, unknown to anyone, who disappeared right after birth, and the king is looking for her?'

'Correct.'

 'It seems crazy,' she crossed her arms, leaning on the back of the chair. 'But then, why is he looking for her, after all these years?'

'He is very ill,' Aleksander began.

'The tsar is dying?' the girl widened her eyes.

'Remember that everything we say is confidential, Miss Anya,' he said with a slight undertone of threat, and she nodded. 'The tsar claims that the disappearance of the second daughter is his greatest regret, and he cannot die peacefully until he finds her.'

She seemed to reflect on it for a while; Aleksander could see the gears in her brain turning. When she finished, she raised an eyebrow. 'So, I should go there, give him the farewell kiss, and then what?'

'Then you would retire to the quiet life you know and prefer, in a villa located in the countryside far from Os Alta, with more money than you can count, never worring about working ever again.'

Anya sensed it, the smell of bullshit. 'And what do you gain?'

'A peaceful passing for my beloved sovereign.'

The coldness with which he said it made the hairs on the back of her neck stand.

She took a second to think about it, but even if she knew he would gain something, Anya thought she didn't care much, as long as she came out of it alive. And rich. Terribly rich.

[][][]

During the carriage journey to Os Alta, Kirigan instructed Anya on everything she could say and, above all, what she shouldn't say. The lost princess Katarina had grown up in an orphanage on the border of Shu territory, never knowing who her parents were. When she was old enough to leave, she became a seamstress. They met in a shop where she worked and sold him gloves.

'But I don't know how to sew,' Anya had objected.

'You'll learn along the way,' Kirigan had replied without looking up from his lunch.

Anya had raised an eyebrow but didn't comment.

Apart from that, the journey was mostly silent and terribly boring. The black carriage they traveled in had dark curtains that prevented them from seeing outside, making it difficult to distinguish morning from evening.

For three days, the General was her only company, as he had forbidden her to talk to anyone else to maintain secrecy.

Just beyond the gates of Os Alta, the terrible silence surrounding the carriage was broken by the chaos from outside. Intrigued by the commotion, Anya reached a hand toward the curtain and pulled it slightly.

Outside, an adoring crowd had gathered around the carriage. They threw flowers and shouted, 'Glory to the tsar, glory to Ravka.'

'I didn't know you were so loved, General,' Anya turned to Kirigan, who, with his dark and heavy clothes and long legs, seemed to take up all the space in front of her.

Kirigan moved a flap of the curtain with a finger.

'They're not cheering for me, Miss Anya.'

The girl looked confused, and he handed her a newspaper he had next to him.

'What am I supposed to do with this?' Anya waved it.

'Usually, people read newspapers, Miss Anya.'

She clenched her jaw, swallowing. 'The. P- Prin-cess. Princess.'

Aleksander furrowed his brow. 'Miss Anya... you can read, right?'

'Of course!' Anya seemed almost offended. 'I just don't like it that much.'

Aleksander almost laughed as he watched her straighten up and furrow her brows as if facing an indecipherable puzzle. 'The princess re-tu-returns ho-me.' Anya tossed the newspaper on the cushion beside her. 'I don't understand,' she sighed, looking at Kirigan.

‘They’re here for you, Princess Katarina.' He gave her a half-smile, and Anya's jaw dropped.

'I had never received applause before the performance.'

Aleksander almost laughed.

Around an hour later, the carriage stopped.

'Well, Miss Anya, the show is about to begin.' Aleksander opened a door and stepped out before reaching his hand inside to help Anya get down. As her eyes adjusted to the outside light, Aleksander took her arm and crossed it with his. For a moment, Anya was surprised by such chivalry until she realized that the proximity was necessary only to ensure that no one heard him when he whispered, 'And know that if you back out, no corner will be dark enough to hide you from me, Miss Anya.'

[silverhallow]

Bridgerton drabble: A Princess Diaries AU

Part #1 Sophie’s Choice.

A belated birthday gift for @bridgertonbabe and @sophiebernadotte

Wasn’t life as a princess supposed to be fair? Or maybe not fair, that might be the wrong word. She was privileged, she knew that… even if she had only known she was a princess for a few short years.

Royalty led lives that were in the public eye, normally having been raised in that environment, but here she was… sitting in a country that she’d only known about for 4 years, listening to her grandmother scolding her for jeopardising the wedding that was to take place in a few days time, which would then lead onto her coronation a week after that and it was all Sophie could do not to throw up or cry because she knew her grandmother was right… she had ruined everything.

She’d always dreamt she’d marry for love, that she’d find a man that made her stomach fizz, give her butterflies, that would make her heart skip a beat and her palms sweaty and her feet pop when she kissed him. She wanted the kind of love her mother had told her about, that her mother had experienced but due to the unfairness of her situation, it was an arranged marriage or lose her throne. Those were her options.

A throne that until she turned 16, she had known nothing about.

She had been blissfully unaware that her father had been a Prince… Prince of a tiny country in the middle of the Italian and French sea. Her mother had kept it from her, taking that secret with her to her grave.

Her mother had died 10 weeks before Sophie’s 16th birthday, which was the day her entire life changed.

She’d been stopping with her best friend Kate Sharma and Sophie had been in English when the poshest woman Sophie had ever seen in her life came in and dropped the bombshell of all bombshells on her over a cup of tea…

Which she promptly spat all over her “grandmother's” face.

She was a princess.

A bastard princess but a princess nonetheless, and the only living descendant of the Gunningworth line.

Her father, Richard, had passed away 9 months earlier and to Sarah’s knowledge he had been childless.

It was only after discovering something in her late-husband’s writing desk, did she learn that there was in fact an heir.

Her.

Sophie was saving the country from being taken over by the Cavender’s. Their son Phillip had a terrible temper and an even worse reputation at just 17 years old and had once been rulers of their own lands until the people revolted and won back their lands and banished the Cavender’s but their royal blood was connected to Penwood and now it was Sophie, or the Cavender’s and Sarah was determined that her throne would not pass into their hands.

She had learned that Reginald had sent Esme away when she was pregnant with Sophie, he didn’t want a child out of wedlock and he certainly didn’t want the Crown Prince, only Heir to the Throne marrying a commoner and so she’d been paid off and shipped off back to England. He provided money monthly to keep Esme quiet and Esme had been promised that she and her unborn child would be left alone and the secret of Sophie’s birth went to the grave with her.

Reginald had known about Sophie and he had been working out how to tell his wife that they did in fact have an heir and where they could find her, and what had happened, his own guilt weighing in after he’d pressured Richard into a marriage with a woman that bore no children between them other than two step-children who could not inherit the throne but when Reginald died 3 months after Richard it had thrown a spanner in the works as he’d not gotten around to telling Sarah the truth.

Sophie was dumbfounded.

Sarah was Regent, as they had their heir but she was underage and she was able to prevent Cavender getting his hands on the crown.

Since Sophie was underage she would learn the role, but upon turning 20 Sophie was told she’d have to take over the throne, she would get 6 months post her 20th birthday to marry and be crowned Queen otherwise, Cavender would take over.

So Life changed.

Gone were the days she was invisible, where she could blend into the background with Kate, sitting laughing about Shakespere and just being a teenage girl to…

Being a Princess.

She stayed in school but Kate was almost glued to her side. She worked at her studies, she travelled back and forth between the countries as she learned.

Once she was 18, Sophie moved to Penwood and Kate and her family came with her, they’d been her family when she had no one else and Kate wanted to work with Sophie, for Sophie as part of her staff once she’d graduated from University.

And Sophie knew from the moment she moved to her new home that she wanted to be Queen, that she would do anything to be Queen. Her beautiful country that she was learning to love, the rich culture and history that was hers to protect and nourish and the more time she spent there, the more she got to know the people, the more she knew she wanted to be Queen.

So between her studies, her Queen lessons with her Grandmother and getting to know the country’s leaders, she was starting to look for a husband.

Not just any husband, she needed someone titled, not in line for their own throne, someone who understood her importance as Queen. Someone harmless, inoffensive, who would stand there by her side and be a pillar of strength and a symbol but would let Sophie lead.

She would be Queen, and she knew finding a husband would be hard but she had time… or so she’d assumed. She was only 18 after all, she had two years. How hard could it be?

From the moment the plane touched down, Sophie knew that whatever she’d thought her life was going to be like, nothing compared to the circus it was becoming

.

18 turned into 19 and Sophie had still not found someone that she wanted to marry, any male around her age that would be eligible was not interested in marriage, any man she met at a bar knew who she was and wanted a piece of her as a trophy.

She was to be Queen… Everyone knew that. “Your highness, you must know there isn’t a man on this planet who isn’t interested in marrying you, but it is finding the right person for you who will make your everyday life easier, who makes the mundane fun and who makes you smile” her Prime Minister Edmund Bridgerton had told her as the days got closer to her 20th birthday and she had still not found someone to be her husband, time was running out and she was getting desperate.

“That is all well and good my Lord but I have 6 months, we have 6 months to make this work or everything has been in vain” Sophie sighed during their weekly meeting. Sophie loved meeting her prime minister, They had joked on a number of occasions it was a shame that his title came with his position and didn’t transfer to his children since he had eight of them and the two eldest boys were a little older than Sophie and Kate, she’d yet to meet Benedict who was off travelling and studying and she got on well with Anthony, who was training to take over from Charlie as the Royal Household Chief of Security once Sophie ascended to the throne.

The little wrinkle there was Anthony was dating Kate. Kate was working up to the role of Chief of Staff within the palace and eventually they would run the palace between them and despite their prickly start, Sophie thought they were perfect for one another but it served as an almost daily reminder that she didn’t have that and she needed that. 6 months to fall in love, marry to become Queen…

“There are other ways around it, your grandmother is reluctant to bring it up because she knew how much you wanted to find someone the traditional way but there is always an arranged marriage, I am sure between Ms Gibbons, your grandmother and my wife Violet, they’ll be able to come up with a list of possibilities for you. Aim for friendship first, it worked for your grandmother… love everything else, it is lovely but friendship and companionship will hold you in just as good a stead” Edmund explained

“That’s easy for you to say, you married the love of your live and have 8 children” Sophie replied flippantly but sighed “but I shall think about it, it is likely to be the only option”

“Speaking of my children…” Edmund grinned and Sophie rolled her eyes

“Smooth… what are they after this time?”

“It’s nothing actually just Benedict is back from his travels eventually this weekend after being away for the last two years studying and he is on the last portfolio for his masters and I was wondering if perhaps as a small favour we could add him to your official photographers list up to the coronation and allow him to capture some more… candid photos of the next few months”

“Why not, some candid ones will be lovely I guess after all the formal things…” Sophie said “and i’ll make sure there is a ticket to my 20th birthday party for him as well, if he is back in time that is, it would be nice to meet another of your ridiculous brood. but I will give some thought to your suggestion, having some of those possible bachelors come to the party and meet them…” Sophie sighed.

But after the events of her 20th birthday, Sophie had known it was time.

The only person she’d met the night of her birthday party, the only person she’d felt a connection with had been someone she knew she had no chance with.

She’d been walking through the party, trying to get away from Prince Hans and his incessant staring, as well as Lady Rosamund who was making snide quiet remarks about how it should be her that was going to be queen when Sophie had run straight into a stranger stomping straight on his foot, the most handsome stranger she’d ever met.

It was only after she’d danced and flirted with him and spoke to Kate, did she realise that it was Benedict Bridgerton and it had broken her heart almost instantly.

She’d assumed he was one of the many suitors her grandmother had invited for to meet so to realise who he was, that he was untitled, he was, despite being the son of a Lord, not someone Sophie could ever hope to get to know on a more intimate and romantic level… she knew based on the rules that had been set out for her future husband, it was a no go.

So the morning after her party, she’d called Kate, her grandmother, Ann Gibbons the current chief of staff and Mary and said “it’s time”

A week later she was sitting in the palace movie room with the screens up, profiles up as she looked through all the eligible bachelors that would be interested in an arranged marriage.

Two hours it had taken, going through picture after picture before Sophie had spotted one.

Yes he was a second son but he fit the bill where no one else did. He was the second son of a Duke. His older brother was already married and had twins, their line was secure, he was a Sir. He had a title, a ceremonial one but all the same…

Sir Phillip Crane was everything that Sophie had been looking for.

He was the same age as she was, he was academic, he was cute. He was someone that Sophie could see herself being at least friends with…

It was a start.

And it had turned out Phillip was everything that Sophie could have hoped for. He was kind, he was funny and they seemed to have a lot in common and Sophie knew she’d made the best possible choice…

Or she would have thought so if it wasn’t for Benedict being everywhere she went.

She’d forgotten about her agreement with the Prime Minister and being Anthony’s brother, and he seemed to get on really well with Kate. he was always there.

The torment Sophie felt was horrible, she felt attracted to Benedict in a way she knew she’d never be attracted to Phillip but she knew that she could never be with Benedict and have the life she so desperately wanted.

She wanted to be Queen, she wanted to rule this country that she’d learned so much about, that she was so passionate about and she was close to mucking it all up.

Two weeks before the wedding it all came to a head when during the summer party, Sophie had slipped away from Phillip, leaving him with Kate and Benedict’s sister Eloise as she wanted to get out of her head. Cavender’s son had been lurking and making lurid remarks about her and she just wanted 5 minutes.

She’d given her ladies maids the slip, and was just sitting on the edge of the fountain, trying not to hyperventilate.

She’d not seen Benedict at all during the party, he was employed during these events to take photos as part of her agreement with his father and she knew that it was the last thing she needed. Whilst she desperately craved him to soothe her frayed nerves, she knew being around him was making it worse.

They’d had many a spirited debate about Bryon, about poetry and art and she always seemed to know when he appeared, her skin tingled and pricked but he knew as well as she did, that whatever there was between them, wasn’t possible.

With the way the rules of the country where, fate was destined to keep them apart.

But that day… he’d caught her unaware, they’d given into a moment of weakness and kissed.

It was only when Sophie’s beloved dog Bernie, had come running through the fence with voices behind him, that they’d separated and in their shock at nearly being caught, they had tumbled into the fountain.

It had been the start of her downfall.

She’d confined Kate how she felt about Benedict, how she wished things could be different and she knew that Benedict had felt the same and how she couldn’t have him around her anymore because it was breaking her heart.

Benedict had agreed to step away, to leave his position because he knew the country needed Sophie more than he did and he would never have forgiven himself to do anything that would have ruined her dream to be Queen,

But he’d asked if he could see her one last time before he left, before he walked away and Sophie would marry Phillip and Sophie had agreed as long as no one found out.

But someone had found out. Someone had overheard and warned the press that if someone followed the Prime Minister’s son… they would find a scandal.

And whilst it wasn’t as big of a scandal as it could have been, Sophie and Benedict had just talked, shared a kiss or two, they’d fallen asleep under a tree in the grounds of the castle and it was upon waking that they’d been spotted…

And Sophie was sure her life was going to fall apart.

Sarah yelled at her for over an hour about it, about how she should not be sneaking out and despite the fact she knew how her granddaughter felt about him, she could see how devastated Sophie was about the choice.

Heart or country.

It was a choice she’d known all too well but Sophie knew what she wanted.

What was required of her… it was just a matter of if Phillip would still want to marry her.

“Phillip wait, please! Let me explain! Nothing happened” Sophie said as she ran after Phillip a few hours later after he’d arrived at the palace so they could talk.

“Yes but you went Sophie, you still went didn’t you?” he replied, his voice was strangely calm and not angry and Sophie wasn’t sure if she’d rather he’d been angry or not “I don’t think you understand… despite my geekiness as the press back home call it, I am an extremely eligible bachelor” he said, though Sophie could tell he cringed a bit at the words, knowing he didn’t like to big himself in that way. “I really am. I’ve got plenty of friends, lots of lovely… erm women friends” he said gesturing as they looked at one another

“But i… I still think marriage is a good idea.” he said and Sophie looked up at him in disbelief as Phillip’s face softened as they looked at one another,

“Sophie…” he said, before taking a step forward, placing his hands on either side of her face and kissing her.

It was the first time they’d properly kissed, it had been a brief kiss on the lips when they’d gotten engaged, the same on the balcony when they announced their engagement several weeks ago and as kisses went…

It was the most awkward kiss either of them had ever experienced.

It was like kissing a sibling. It was so awkward Sophie was sure the entire world stopped moving and she could hear the cows in the field several miles away Mooing…

Eventually Phillip pulled away and Sophie with her eyes still shut brought her hand to her lip to almost wipe the kiss off as she had Phillip looked at one another again

“So?” he asked “anything?” already anticipating the answer.

“It was lovely… just… there was no…” Sophie said

“Spark?” they said at the same time and Sophie groaned as she knew what the right thing to do was.

“What are we going to do?” Sophie said her voice breaking a little as she felt herself close to tears. The wedding was a few days away, she’d come this far and now she’d thrown it all away.

Phillip sighed and took a step forward putting an arm around Sophie’s waist, rolling his eyes as the security guards shovelled up the stairs behind them

“No privacy…” Sophie grumbled.

“Sophie… you chose me… and I accepted” he said pressing an almost brotherly kiss on her head “I accepted and so we’re going to stand up in the church next week and say “I do” and become man and wife… and then you’re going to be crowned Queen of Penwood and make the most amazing Queen in the history of this great country” he said tenderly, honestly and a smile on his face that made Sophie feel like perhaps everything could be okay.

“Thank you” she whispered as she kissed his cheek as she smiled back at him.

This was it. Her choice had been made. Country and Duty over her heart. Phillip was a good man and she could do a lot worse…

[galexibrain]

WIP WEDNESDAY!

“You’re injured.” He has a huge bruise on his left cheek. His armor is gone but the suit underneath is mostly intact save for a few tears here and there. A few bloody cuts are visible underneath but Bulma has seen worse. It’s definitely nothing compared to the gaping hole in Trunks’ armor … Bulma should be used to death by now, but knowing this version of her own son has died once already … and more so … “Barely,” Vegeta retorts and continues on his way. Bulma sighs and gets up to follow him after getting some cold packs from the freezer. She catches up with him at the entrance of the bathroom. “Come on, let’s sort you out.” “Leave me alone, I don’t need you.” And yet you keep coming back here. “I know. But you might need this cold pack, or else your face will look like a pumpkin tomorrow.” She throws him the pack which he catches less effortlessly than usual which means that, while not being mortally wounded, he’s still pretty fucking thrashed. ____ “I am the Prince of the Saiyans, born to be the most powerful being in the universe,” he whispers, eyes burning with indignant rage. “I will not be thrown out.”  “Are you threatening me?” Bulma doesn’t know why she’s not afraid of him. She used to be, back on Namek, but here on Earth, with his entire life taken from him she quickly realized he was no threat. Not to her.  And now he can glare at her all he wants, balling his fists, twitching his muscles, and she feels not threatened at all.  It’s not like she trusts him. Heaven knows she doesn’t. But she knows with a certainty she can’t explain that Vegeta, maybe the most dangerous man on this entire planet, isn’t going to lay a hand on her no matter what.  But how about the other way round?  Instead of stepping back, she closes in on him too until their faces are uncomfortable close.  Vegeta already leans back. Non-violent physical proximity unsettles him.  “I don’t need you,” Bulma says to his face. “I have everything. A family, a son who is going to grow up into a hero, friends I would give my own life for, more money than I can spend, and I’m the smartest person on this planet. Gero built machines that gave you and Goku some serious trouble. I have building plans of several of them. Do you really think I couldn’t reproduce what he did? If I wanted I could build myself an android that single-handedly throws you into space. I’m not afraid of you. All you are right now is a nuisance. Getting rid of you would make my life a lot easier.” 

Some post-Cell Games Vegebul get-together. It's a rocky ride.

[cherr-22]

TNGDH 24

I held up my hand to my forehead and looked up at the sky. The sun shined brightly with not a single cloud in sight.

“The weather is good.”

A wide smile spread across my face as I admired the beautiful, warm Blake estate today.

Pure white bricks laid neatly in rows and stalls lined up on both sides. Behind them were simple shops run by the people.

That’s right. Shops.

I admired the coin purse hanging by my side. It’s heavy. According to Kyle, I would have plenty of money even after saying ‘give me everything from here to there’ right now. 

While I didn’t plan on spending that much, isn’t good to have a lot? Even as Bae Soohyun I couldn’t enjoy such a luxury.

……To be more accurate, I died just before I got the chance to do so.

“Let’s go, porter.”

I shook my head to clear my thoughts and turned to Kyle. He was dressed lighter than usual and was looking down at me with his eyebrow raised at me.

There’s no point in giving me that look. Of course I’d call you a porter. It’s not like you would call this a date. In the first place, you’re the one who wanted to tag along.

I turned around ignoring his stunned reaction and lifted up the heavy coin purse.

No matter what, I’m going to use this all. I won’t die before these are all spent.

This is something I realized after dying once, but money should be spent while it’s in your pocket. I’ll show you what it means to earn like a Northern prince and spend like a hamster. 

“Slowly.”

He grabbed the back of my neck before I could run off.

I frowned and scrutinized him. In my mouth held a piece of jerky I received at the stall selling dried meat.

“…….”

“Whad. Whad ah yoo looing ah.”

What. What are you looking at.

“……Nothing. Keep eating.”

Wow. This is absolutely crazy. How on earth did they make this sauce? Can a taste like this even exist?

Must buy it now.

I bought two packs of jerky. As I took out a shiny gold coin, Kyle held onto my bags.

Nibbling on the jerky, I headed for the next shop. Here they sold a ‘bracelet that can make you healthy just by wearing it!’. That was what was written on a thick piece of paper next to it.

<Shocking news! Beneficial mana energy is flowing out!>

……What is this, a germanium bracelet or something? The color seems similar too…… this is obviously a scam.

On the other hand, Kyle who was standing next to me held the bracelet up with interest.

“Are there any sizes suitable for a hamster?”

As if there would be any.

In the first place, don’t think about buying one. That energy or whatever. Mana stone or whatever. Oh dear, this is giving me a headache.

‘Maybe I should’ve pretended that there are special demonic beasts with rare constitution that don’t develop mana stones.’

I sighed as I dragged him to the next shop. He would’ve put an order down for the hamster bracelet if we stayed there for even a minute longer.

��Let’s see. Where can I buy clothes.”

“The cape is very warm! Thick and light!”

“Scarves, buy scarves here!”

“Delicious demonic beast meat skewers!”

“Buy one get one free bag of peanut crackers!”

The lively atmosphere of the market brightened my mood.

I bought everything that looked good. The shopping bags drooping off of the Grand Duke’s arms- ah, no don’t do that. Hang the bags on your left arm, not your precious right arm.

“Shoes made from the tough leather of a Northern elephant!”

“Have a look at these pants! Even the Blake knights wear these as training uniforms!”

Obviously I can’t hold back on these.

“Here are sweet and sour tangerine candy. Come see handmade candy made by a craftsman with 30 years of experience!”

This, can’t hold back on this either.

“These are crepes. We’re selling for only one more day to commemorate for the festival!”

Definitely can’t hold back.

“This sure is great.”

The money was spent rapidly, and the once heavy coin purse felt lighter and lighter over time. Both of Kyle’s arms were fully occupied with my shopping bags.

“What’s wrong?”

I asked while holding crepes in both hands. Kyle replied calmly.

“You are more easy to satisfy than I thought.”

I’m about to sell out all the shops and yet you call me frugal.

As expected of the Grand Duke of the North, this kind of spending must be nothing compared to what he spends on a single hamster. Would I have to buy the entire shop to surprise you?

“Today, I will treat you. Would you like some of this crepe? There’s raspberry inside.”

I bought one for myself because it looked delicious but suddenly felt bad seeing the porter work hard all day long. Ah, such a kind heart I have.

He stretched out his neck forward slightly.

“I have no open hands to hold it myself.”

“……Ah. You’re right.”

Both hands were filled with bags. My bags. I did bring him as a porter but……

Still, isn’t he the owner of this land and the ruler of the North? He has been following me behind silently, but the eyes of the shop owners would pop out whenever they recognized him.

“There’s no other choice.”

After contemplating a bit, I raised one of my arm to hold the crepe in front of Kyle’s mouth.

He remained still, as if this kind of situation was new to him. What else do you expect me to do. Should I go buy another arm for you somewhere instead?

“Why are you looking at me like that?”

“Because it’s unexpected.”

Kyle lowered his head and took a bite out of the crepe. An entire corner disappeared in an instant. ……Was it that tiring to hold the bags?

“It’s my first time to be directly fed like this.”

[First time~ It’s his first time! 〜(￣▽￣〜)(〜￣▽￣)〜]

Stop celebrating.

“It’s not like you’re a demonic beast. Why couldn’t you be fed like this.”

“They find me difficult usually.”

“You wouldn’t be difficult if they interact with you everyday.”

I said as if it were nothing special.

He may be a solemn duke in front of others, but to me, he was just a hamster otaku who kissed me everywhere with no reservation. It would be even weirder if I still found him difficult to be with.

“Have we been seeing each other everyday?”

Oops.

“……Recently we have. We saw each other yesterday and the day before yesterday.”

I kept my arm held up for him to eat the crepe and then turned to my share of the crepe in my other hand. Let’s see. Cranberry whipped cream made from goat milk……

“Too sour!”

Kyle flinched upon hearing my cry.

“……Is this your first time having whipped cream?”

“No, I’ve had them plenty of times. Whipped cream should be fluffy and savory, and yet why does this taste like this? And to add sour cranberries on top of that. It makes it twice as sour!”

Kyle tilted his head in confusion and took another bite out of the crepe.

“Whipped cream usually taste like this.”

Seeing him, I bit into mine again.

Sour as expected.

“No. Crepes are usually supposed to be so sweet that it makes your mouth ticklish to be delicious.”

This guy knows nothing. The cloud-like fluffiness is the charm of whipped cream, and yet he doesn’t believe me.

At 9:30PM, I used to have a piece of fresh cream cake delivered from the cafe near my office. It was always the last order since the shop closed at 10:00PM. Roughly once a month, I would have it on a hard day to melt away my fatigue.

Those were hard times, but thinking about it now felt like old memories.

“Is that so…….”

Kyle held a serious expression.

“If you don’t like it, you should throw it away and eat something else.”

“What are you talking about? How wasteful. Besides, just because it’s sour doesn’t mean I can’t eat it.”

“Alright. Eat a lot.”

He finished the crepe and lightly squeezed my wrist to examine it.

“Small and skinny.”

What bullshit is he saying. I’m slightly bigger than the average Korean. I’ve never been told I was small. Especially with one insole in my shoe, my height reached 180 centimeters tall. A thin insole of course, not the thick one.

“Are you sure it’s not just you being too big?”

He let out a low chuckle.

“Eat lots of meat. Even with me protecting you, your body must be in good condition to go out on the reconnaissance. In the Blake territory, even the support units receive martial arts training, not just the knights and soldiers.

Kyle asked as I finished off my crepe.

“Do you have any weapons you can use?”

“No.”

“Any specialties?”

“……Ummm…… language?”

C language is also a language after all.

### programming language

“Besides that.”

“Eating a lot?”

In the case that I failed to develop the game, the lady who worked at the restaurant I frequented said I should try doing a mukbang.

### Mukbang is a live-stream where viewers watch the host eat

“Haaa…….”

He sighed deeply.

What’s wrong. Do I seem like luggage burden now that you think about it?

But consider yourself lucky. As long as I have the system with me, your future will be bright. It may sound odd, but just believe in me.

“Is there something wrong?”

I asked in a provocative tone.

“Are you already worried that you won’t be able to protect me?”

The nickname ‘Loser of the North’ would probably spread throughout the land if that were the case. It’s not like he gained fame as the ‘Bloody Grand Duke’ by killing innocent people. If he can’t protect even a single civilian, he would have to step down from his position as the lord.

His eyebrows furrowed upon hearing my provocation and laughed as if he were intrigued.

“You sure know how to provoke someone.”

“Thank you for the complement.”

Office workers usually fight well. Fighting with clients, fighting with their boss, fighting with overtime… I won’t lose to anyone anywhere.

“Where should I move this to?”

After busily walking around eating this and that, we ended up at the front of the Blake castle. He glanced at me as if to say that I would have to climb the stairs myself this time. I know, I know. It’s not like I don’t have legs.

I trudged up the stairs as slow as a turtle.

“I’ll be shoving them into an unused storage room.”

“Not the servant’s dorm room?”

“Yes. There are no space left for me. I was only able to go there in the past because Sen was with me.”

“…….”

How would I put all these bags into the break room of the servant’s dorm without putting up with the others’ stares?

I’ve been meeting with Kyle in the break room until now since I didn’t want to meet him in his study. Now that Sen has left, no matter how thick-faced I may be, staying there would be too much.

“I’ll get you a room.”

Kyle said it as if it were nothing. You can give away a room just by saying you’ll give me a room?

“……Huh? Really?”

“You must’ve forgotten, but you are also one of the castle’s people.”

Oh right.

“I request a room with a big window.”

If I’m going to receive one, I should get a good one while I have the chance.

With that, the items I bought from the stores today piled up high in my newly assigned room.

As expected, the world revolves around money.

--------------------------------------------------------

Previous Chapter / Next Chapter

T/N: I will not be able to post a chapter for next week so this is an early chapter, plus a bonus chapter 25 as an apology!

[frankenstein-was-a-grad-student]

On the role of ~analysis~ in literature:

I recently read a comparison between Jon Snow and Daenerys Targaryen where the OP claimed Dany was “raised on the streets.” I thought to myself How on earth could they come to this conclusion? Where in the text were they getting that idea?

In the comments, the OP argued that because Viserys was called a “beggar king” he was begging in the streets for food. When others chimed in to correct them ("Oh that's a reflection on Viserys' reliance on the hospitality of the wealthy and a reflection of their exile") OP doubled down. When pressed for sources OP gives two citations (an unsurprisingly paltry amount of "evidence" to support their claim). First, they said, Dany says this in Chapter 3 of Game of Thrones. Okay, it's not a quote but it should be easy enough to source, right? Here's the passage in question:

There are a few important sections of the passage we need to parse for OP, since they seem to have struggled. Firstly, what does it mean when Dany says "After Ser Willem had died, the servants had stolen what little money they had left, and soon after they had been put out of the big house. Dany had cried when the red door closed behind them forever."

According to OP, this indicates they were penniless (mostly correct) and put out on the streets (incorrect). The home in Braavos appears to be one they owned themselves (or at least Ser Willem owned) so they could live independently. When they're put out from that house they lose what little independence they had left and are now reliant on the generosity of the nobles, merchants, and traders of the Free Cities. This is confirmed in the next passage: "They had wandered since then, from Braavos to Myr, from Myr to Tyrosh, and on to Qohor and Volantis and Lys, never staying long in any one place." This is followed by: "At first the magisters and archons and merchant princes were pleased to welcome the last Targaryens to their homes and tables, but as the years passed and the Usurper continued to sit upon the Iron Throne, doors closed and their lives grew meaner. Years past they had been forced to sell their last few treasures, and now even the coin they had gotten from Mother’s crown had gone. In the alleys and wine sinks of Pentos, they called her brother 'the beggar king.' Dany did not want to know what they called her." And so here we get to it: the beggar king.

OP reads the beggar king as two children living in the slums rather than two royal children flitting from rich person to rich person. They had to sell Rhaella's crown to survive! OP says. How could you think they were living amongst the rich!

I can imagine a lot of things selling a crown would get you that are important to your overall survival that don't require you to live on the streets: 1. travel to the next rich person's household you're going to stay in including but not limited to passage on ships, inns along the way, etc. 2. guards to fight off those yet unmaterialized assassins Viserys is always on about 3. clothing and personal care items like oils/perfumes so you can look the part of Targaryen prince and princess, rich people expect a certain level of finery. 3. gifts etc for your hosts and those you wish to come to your side with troops so you can retake Westeros. Here's where chapter 16 of DWD comes in. OP cites the following passage as an example of soldiers stealing the last bit of money Dany and Viserys had so they needed to beg on the streets.

"Her brother Viserys had once feasted the captains of the Golden Company, in hopes they might take up his cause. They ate his food and heard his pleas and laughed at him. Dany had only been a little girl, but she remembered. 'I have sellswords too.'"

Where OP sees soldiers stealing their food, Viserys is actually hosting a mercenary army hoping to convince them to help him reclaim the Iron Throne. This was an expensive affair, to feast captains like this. They were certainly not one meal away from nothing, they weren't sleeping outside, they weren't in the slums.

Context is important here: for a noble child to be poor is different than an urchin. There are different base levels of comfort, different base levels of food and housing and clothing and safety. It's the equivalent of a twenty-something person like Samuel Bankman-Fried being "broke" and a child who ages out of foster care being "broke." The stakes just aren't the same. SBF might be on the hook for financial crimes, but he's still going to be able to get his $12 smoothie bowl no problem. He's still going to have somewhere safe to sleep at night. We actually do have a depiction of a rich child living in the slums from GRRM to compare with as well, luckily enough. Here's Arya's account of her early days on the street after fleeing the Red Keep: "The silver bracelet she’d hoped to sell had been stolen her first night out of the castle, along with her bundle of good clothes, snatched while she slept in a burnt-out house off Pig Alley. All they left her was the cloak she had been huddled in, the leathers on her back, her wooden practice sword . . . and Needle. She’d been lying on top of Needle, or else it would have been gone too; it was worth more than all the rest together. Since then Arya had taken to walking around with her cloak draped over her right arm, to conceal the blade at her hip. The wooden sword she carried in her left hand, out where everybody could see it, to scare off robbers, but there were men in the pot-shops who wouldn’t have been scared off if she’d had a battle-axe. It was enough to make her lose her taste for pigeon and stale bread. Often as not, she went to bed hungry rather than risk the stares." Markedly different than anything we've heard in Dany's chapters, right?

When this was pointed out to OP, they shot back with I interpreted it differently and it's just as valid, this is my analysis. This is not a question of the author leaving things ambiguous or open to interpretation. This is clear: it is informed by character dialogue and context clues like setting, class, and direct comparison to other characters in that situation you've imagined for Daenerys. This is bad analysis. This would get a failing grade in a high school or college english class, both for reading comprehension and as evidence for any thesis-driven argument.

The quality of your analysis matters, not just that you "analyzed it." Anyway I'm a hater, I know, but seriously people let's put all those high school literature classes to work when we engage with our favorite fandoms.

[namazunomegami]

prince!toji x imperial concubine!reader

a/n: Part 3 of my drabble series is finished!! I'm not a Toji simp but writing him was a surprisingly easy process. And for the love of god I just can't finish Gojo it's so hard to handle him in this specific setting.

Sorry Toji girlies but I just can't imagine him as an emperor in the AU, but being a disgraced prince goes sooo well with his character. Hope you'll enjoy this part as much as I did while working on it!

Likes and reblogs are still appreciated <33

wc: 1060, I got carried away with the exposition

cw: Toji is a dick, smut, period accurate euphemism for an orgasm, angsty ending

credits: My one and only @notveryrussian did the proofreading again, thank u darl <33

MDNI, if you do, I'm gonna block you so hard you'll feel it in your next life

When an emperor dies, his mandate dies with him. The death of a god can shake the whole realm, it shakes the whole family. Anomalies start to happen because heaven’s throne shouldn’t stay vacant for long.

Toji almost lost the last bit of his sanity when he was summoned to the capital. It’s sickening that the court wanted him to go back to the palace and pay his respects to the recently deceased Naobito. Another blow to his already wounded pride. They want him to venerate the uncle who cast him out of the family, who banished him to a rural town to live in conditions so unfitting for his rank, with no support on top of all of that. Luckily, he’s familiar with many shortcuts to easy money.

The embalmed corpse of the late emperor is his only delight. The spacious halls and courtyards of the palaces, the carvings, the decorative paintings, thangkas, the ginormous, lush gardens made him yearn for that small house he was sent to. This place just wasn’t home anymore. Those related to him weren’t family anymore. They get through with the funeral rites, the relatives and the officials will settle the line of succession, and then he’ll leave, he has no other reason to stay here. He has no hopes to be chosen as emperor. Naobito and Jinichi already did so much damage to his name. Maybe the rest of the family just want something to gossip about for a few years, that’s why they called him back.

It’s all so tiring. The vigils, the march to the tomb, the prayers the monks recite, the offerings. He has nothing to give, not even an incense stick or a plate of fruits. He endures the rites in silence, he has no pleasant memories to reflect upon or kind words to say about him much to his cousins’ dismay. He wants to tear everything to pieces, burn the whole city down and piss on the ruins because that’s what Naobito always deserved.

After the funeral, the whole palace descends into chaos. Naobito failed to appoint an heir, every one of his kids has an equal chance to inherit the throne and the whole court sits in the Hall of Mental Cultivation to argue about the distribution of wealth, the army, and the provinces between the family. They’re like jackals, bickering over the meat on a rotten corpse.

Before he planned to sneak into the Hall of Three Rarities to look at (and maybe steal) some of the relics, the issue of the concubines was brought up.

You’re a lovely little bunch. Naobito wasn’t a man known for his gentleness, the mutual torment made you stick together, support each other. Just the thought of it makes his cold heart fill with a strange kind of comfort. You’re all so lost, having no idea what will happen to you, who will have ownership over you. You out of all of them pray every night that Naoya will never be crowned emperor. You’d rather escape, beg for money and crumbs of dry bread on the streets before you’d let him touch you.

Maybe your prejudice towards the royal family and your gut feeling was wrong this time. He’s not like any other member of his family. He’s rough around the edges but treats you all with an odd form of kindness. You and the other concubines soon grew to like his company. They await him during leisure time to serve him tea, sing to him, you even dusted off your guzheng to play an ancient melody. With each passing day, the concubines are glowing more and more, melting in his presence. He has them wrapped around his fingers and you start thinking about whether you’re an exception or not.

It’s too late to realize that you’re not.

You walk back to the Palace of Eternal Harmony together after you picked some plums in the gardens. You’re not suspecting anything. It’s already dusk, he just wants to protect you, right? He notices your hairpin, an exquisite and costly thing with dangling pearls and jewels embedded into the flower petals shaped with gold. Naobito must have liked you, he says. You shake your head and confess that you weren’t a particular favorite of his. He has seen you only for a few nights, and you don’t know how but he manages to get all the details out of you. He’s not surprised that Naobito didn’t care about your pleasure, or if he’d caused you any pain and then just threw you away like a used toy.

What a perfect match, a disgraced nephew and an unfavored concubine.

He doesn’t care about the rules in the concubine’s quarters, he lets himself into your small room. You serve him the plums just to hide your own flusteredness. He splits the fruit in half with ease and offers it back to you, handfeeding you. Drips of sweet juice stream down on your chin. There’s depravity and starvation in your eyes. Poor soul, maybe even you can’t remember the last time you were touched. He pities you.

He’s so unlike Naobito.

He has the patience to prepare you, gives you time to adjust to him. This is your first time laying on your back, belly up, every inch of you revealed to him. It makes you feel vulnerable but at least he’s looking at you. Right in the face as your features distort in pleasure. You finally experience what the older consorts called “cloud and rain”. A nice name, you think, but it’s not the right idiom to describe what you’re feeling. It’s like ascension to another plane of existence. A rumble. Rippling warmth. Overflowing joy.

You’re too absorbed in the afterglow to notice how cold he is. The sweat sticking to his skin, the tips of his fingers, everything is so cold about him. But maybe you can warm his heart up. If only he would take you with him after the succession crisis is solved. Get away from this horrid place, let you two finally heal.

But when you wake up he’s gone. He has taken your hairpin, maybe as a memento or to put a price tag on it. The only thing that remains is his seed inside of you. You feel ruined, just like he intended with everything Naobito ever owned.

[melonminnie]

BUT ILL KNOW!.. I’ll know (Various characters x fem! Reader)

INCLUDING ! : Alteris takar , Tristan Valentine, Esteban hermano

SUMMARY: How I think they’d react if you died 🫶

ALTERIS TAKAR the current emperor.

Alteris was never one with emotion, even when he met you, it could be said that maybe for the short amount of time that you existed.

He was able to feel love for the first time again.

At first the emperor would push you away from him, Maybe he’d relax one moment the second he’d be screaming at you to go away.

Of course as any person you were deeply hurt by his actions but understanding why he kept such a walk around people, you’d leave him be.

Smiling after every curse that came out of his mouth towards you, you knew he didn’t mean it as he never acted this way until you came along.

it was hatred, Now Alteris realized it, perhaps maybe he’d liked you just maybe a tiny bit for him to feel guilty after what he said to you.

and so he planned the most extravagant apology he could think of, with the help of tan.

Alteris planned to apologize to you no he planned to confess to you, His heart finally filled with the warmth he never knew he needed.

And so he got ready and waited, waited and waited, With time passing Alteris slumped against a chair and sighed.

He realized how much he wronged you. Two knights slowly approached the defeated emperor shakened slightly.

“your majesty,” the bowed their head as the man’s blue eyes wandered to them giving them permission to speak.

“Her majesty, Y/N has now been pronounced dead an assassination attempt ” one of the two declared, Alteris’s eyes slowly started showing its true colors. Sadness, Alteris was sad and so he would stay sad eventually he’ll move on get a family and he’ll open his heart to another.

TRISTAN, former Duke of Valentine

Tristan was known as a tease when he was seen with you, Which was most of the time.

he smiled warmly around you, you two being friends sense childhood had grown into companions and nothing more.

You growing up to become one of the most beloved people of the empire, One whom everyone desired to be with money and fame, Adorable children and a faithful husband.

But nonetheless nobody liked your relationship with Tristan, As the two of you were married people still let rumors spill in between the cracks.

“Tristan why would I make up such rumors about the two of us?,” the girl cried desperately, The Valentine household had a name to keep and to him you were ruining his hard work.

The duke sighed slightly, “Y/n, go home please” Tristan said, Y/n was hurt as this was the first time she’d ever seen her best friend plead.

And to her nonetheless it made her tear up, “Fine!, I’ll go but..” she trailed off, “Please tell me we will still be friends no?” She said tears filling her eyes.

“What you want to believe is what you want” he replied, “Now go,” he pushed her without any room for conversation.

The two of course had grown apart within time, As y/ns children grew older her letters being rejected she no longer needed to remember a bad memory.

Needing to fulfill her duty as a mother, she’d left behind something she assumed would never be fixed.

‘Y/N F/N THE VISCOUNTESS FOUND DEAD IN THE FOREST’

without ever even contacting you again, you had disappeared it hurt him truly as he hadn’t apologized to you.

not even once and you definitely to him deserved an apology.

ESTEBAN HERMANO current emperor of the hermano country

Being the first empress was of course stressing in every way possible, but you made it work if it meant that you’d have to sit idly starring into space.

Esteban loved you as much as you loved him to protect you from the public eye.

Even when the two of you divorced after the birth of the crown prince, it was known that the two of you were very friendly with each other.

So when he heard that the former empress had been murdered he was shocked yet he refused to believe the rumor.

Of course he did find out that the rumor was true a very long time after the actual rumor.

He wanted to at least be sad that you died, yet he was not able too.