#(again i take no sides here this is mainly for exposure lol)
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goddessofwisdom18 · 6 months ago
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Heard this audio and instantly thought of Feyre <3
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dsmp-shitposts · 3 years ago
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OKAY I'm in an analysis mood so!!
Here's why "Savior" by Rise Against is such a good song about c!wilbur and c!Tommy's relationship in the dream smp!
Firstly tho I just want to give an honorable mention to the first lines of the song: "it kills me not to know this / but I've all but just forgotten / what the color of her eyes were / or the scars and how she got them." it's such a good c!bee duo line and I might have to analyze it in another post lol
(there's kinda a tldr at the bottom if you don't want to read the specific lyric analysis and just was the overall analysis!)
The lyrics I want to analyze (these are more about characterization) are: "as the telling signs of age rain down / a single tear is dropping / through the valleys of an aging face / that this world has forgotten." this is about wilburs resurrection. the first lyrics, "as the telling signs of age rain down" are about how much more different Wilbur looks to Tommy after he was resurrected. wilbur was in limbo for what he perceived to be 13 years, and he shows it physically. he has the white streak of hair that signifies his revival, and I know there's a popular headcanon that wilbur came back "wrong." "A single tear is dropping" is referring to Tommy's reaction to the revival. we know he was in disbelief and even angry at wilbur being back, but intense emotions also can bring on tears. it's a very natural response from your body. The third line is pretty much the same as the first, but "that this world has forgotten" is about wilburs impact on the history of the smp. obviously he's been a very big player in many major plot points, but since his death he has mainly faded to the background in most characters minds, especially after ghostbur's library with all the records from lmanberg got destroyed. as the smp progressed, wilbur got talked about less. focus shifted from him to dream who really emerged as the villain in the story after wilburs death. we can see the impact of this after wilburs revival. everyone on the smp had gotten used to living without him for so long, growing past the people they were when Wilbur was alive. and now when Wilbur gets revived, he expected fanfare and everyone welcoming him back, but in reality people's memory of him faded.
okay now that we have the preface lyrics, we can go into the ones that are more about tommy and Wilbur as a duo. the first ones before the chorus are "but seldom do these words ring true / when I'm constantly failing you / walls that we just can't break through / until we disappear." I'm gonna analyze this with the first two lines and the last two. the first two lines are from Tommy's perspective about him trying to constantly please wilbur. we see this with him gathering lots of stone for him and following Wilbur to stand against Las nevadas and quackity. but even with all of this, Tommy still feels like he's "constantly failing" wilbur and that he needs to do more in order to stay in high regard in Wilbur's mind. we could even look at these same lyrics from wilbur's perspective! wilbur might have felt like he's failed Tommy for not being there for him for the time he was in limbo. I know Wilbur doesn't know about what dream did to Tommy in the exile arc, but I'm betting that if/when wilbur finds out about that, he will feel horrible for not being there himself to stop dream because wilbur cares about Tommy. (this could even lead to him resenting ghostbur more because ghostbur was there but wasn't able to do anything). now with the second half of these lyrics, the "walls that we just can't break through" is referring to the emotional vulnerability, or lack thereof, between the two. I'd argue that wilbur is more emotionally vulnerable to Tommy than Tommy is to wilbur. now, there is a severe lack of communication between the two, but wilbur drops "trauma bombs" where he'll unload something all at once and suddenly. he doesn't do much internal reflection of his feelings, instead wanting to share with others, Tommy in this case, to get validation. with sharing, he wants people to agree that he's a bad person but at the same time wants them to refute those ideas so he feels like he's healing without actually doing anything. now Tommy does more introspection about his feelings (cc! Tommy monologuing) and doesn't feel as big a need as wilbur to share his feelings and trauma. and besides, Wilbur dominates the conversation most of the time anyways so Tommy wouldn't likely be able to carry a constructive conversation about his own feelings without getting talked over by wilbur.
now we're moving onto the chorus! it goes: "that's when she said / 'I don't hate you / I just want to save you / while there's still something left to save' / that's when I told her 'i love you / but I'm not the answer / for the questions that you still have.'" I see this as a conversation between Wilbur and Tommy; Tommy saying the "I don't hate you" section and Wilbur saying the "I love you" section. it's important for Tommy to make it clear to wilbur, and himself, that he doesn't hate Wilbur despite his past betrayal of lmanberg. wilbur thinks everyone hates him, so Tommy consistently sticking by his side is a reminder to Wilbur that he isn't alone. Tommy staying by wilburs side is also how he's ensuring that wilbur doesn't spiral again ("I just want to save you"). he knows that wilbur still isn't in the best mental place, not having the right environment to heal in limbo, so it's more crucial in his mind to be wilbur's crutch right now because it'd be very easy for wilbur to spiral again ("while there's still something left to save"). wilbur, with his part of the lyrics, wants to ensure that Tommy knows he still cares about him despite being gone for a long time. now for the last part of wilburs lyrics, I would love for it to mean that "wilbur understands that he can't be a good mentor to Tommy anymore because of everything that happened. he wants Tommy to realize that he does care for him but their relationship shouldn't function with Wilbur as a mentor anymore," but that wouldn't be accurate to their canon relationship. wilbur still wants to be Tommy's mentor because that's how their relationship has always functioned. my hope is that in wilbur's healing process that he realizes he doesn't have to be a mentor to Tommy, they can just exist as friends. and I would love for Tommy to realize that it's not his job to save Wilbur! while having friends you can talk about your emotions with is good, he shouldn't have to push his own feelings aside to prioritize wilbur's. wilbur also needs to learn that self reflection is a part of healing
the final specific lyrics I want to analyze are: "one thousand miles away / there's nothing left to say / but so much left that I don't know / we never had a choice / this world is too much noise / it takes me under once again." the first three lines, in my opinion, all relate to the fact that Tommy had gone through so much while wilbur was dead, such has dream's manipulation. the last three lines of this section, which are honestly my favorites, are relating to both of their revivals. even though wilbur and Tommy have developed so differently since the lmanberg and pogtopia eras, they have this one thing in common. Tommy didn't have a choice in his death or resurrection. both were committed by dream and have contributed to the massive amount of trauma and PTSD that Tommy has. wilburs death was practically by his own hand as it was an assisted suicide, but his resurrection wasn't his choice, again done by dream murdering ghostbur. that line could also refer to wilbur not feeling like he had a choice in living anymore, feeling like death was the only option for him at the end of his spiral. the last two lines refer to the mental problems that both Wilbur and Tommy are still facing. we talked about wilburs a bit with his need for validation and him villainizing himself in his mind. Tommy still struggles with suicidal ideation, seen most recently with his comments while on the balcony in Las nevadas. he also struggles with his triggers from the final control room and the prison that we see him try and speedrun exposure therapy for. what I'm trying to get at with this is that wilbur and Tommy have developed so differently while away from each other but they have their resurrections in common.
OKAY CONCLUSION TIME!! (also kindof a tldr)
while Tommy and wilbur have been apart from each other for a while and developed in different ways, their relationship after both of them have been revived is centered around both of their relationships to healing from their trauma. Tommy feels like he's the one who has to "save" wilbur and keep him from spiraling again, letting his own feelings be pushed aside to prioritize wilbur's. wilbur lets himself be the saved to Tommy's savior. he consistently seeks out validation for his own feelings instead of taking the time to sort out how he really feels about the things that have happened to him.
if you read this far then oh wow thank you!! I hope this made sense and I'd love to hear what you think of the comparisons to this song!
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thesunnyshow · 4 years ago
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Name: reya
Writing Blog URL(s): @chu-ni
Age: 19
Nationality: african-british
Languages: english, swahili, korean
Star Sign: libra
MBTI: enfp/entp (it always changes lol)
Favorite color: purple!
Favorite food: i really love chicken burgers
Favorite movie: princess and the frog
Favorite ice cream flavor: vanilla!!
Favorite animal: elephants
Go-to karaoke song: fancy - twice
Coffee or tea? What are you ordering? caramel frappe with whipped cream, in general i prefer tea though
Dream job (whether you have a job or not)? secretary general at the UN….or an author
If you could have one superpower, what would you choose? making anyone agree with me and do what i want them to do
If you could visit a historical era, which would you choose? ancient egypt!!
If you could restart your life, knowing what you do now, would you?.....no.
Would you rather fight 100 chicken-sized horses or one horse-sized chicken? neither if i could lmfao but i’d go for 100 chicken sized horses
If you were a trope in a teen high school movie, what would you have been? the nerd who’s actually really pretty after she gets a cool makeover 
Do you believe in aliens/supernatural creatures? im not sure about aliens, but i definitely believe in ghosts and spirits.
What are some small things that make your day better? when i can have moments to myself to enjoy my own company. or when someone asks me what i want to eat and they bring it for me 🥺
Fun fact about yourself that not everyone would know? uhm…...probably the fact that i write fanfiction lol..but outside of that! i sing in the shower. and i talk to myself a lot.
What fandom(s) do you write for? nct dream currently, but in the future i want to expand to other groups!
When did you post your first piece? 17th of June 2018.
Do you write fluff/angst/crack/general/smut, combo, etc? Why? i can never write just one genre. predominantly i write fluff with a dash of angst for spice simply because i love a story that has an issue and then having that issue be resolved for a happy ending. when i started my blog i was 17, and so i said i wouldn't write smut. now that i'm older im feeling more and more comfortable writing suggestive content at the very LEAST.. so maybe in the future i might write smut, who knows? i like writing fluff because i like making people feel good, but i like adding angst to it because i feel like the contrast between the two is very *chefs kiss* to me.
Do you write OCs, X Readers, Ships...etc? i only write x readers!
Why did you decide to write for Tumblr? i first got tumblr when i was 13 years old and i was a fresh kpop fan lmfao. i wanted somewhere that shared my interests. of course i discovered x reader fics on here and i was in awe, i guess of how much power writers had in contributing to fandom content and keeping readers satiated. i’d always loved to write and so i’d always wanted to start my own writing blog, and for 2 years i did write for other blogs! it wasnt until 2018 that i finally took the leap and decided to start my own, because i wanted to impact people's emotions and take them on a journey through my writing.
What inspires you to write? what inspires me….teen movies, music!! music is a big one for me, and also the books that i read. i also grew up playing otome games so the plots and writing from those influence my writing a lot.
What genres/AUs do you enjoy writing the most? i really enjoy writing royalty!aus as well as exes!aus. i love to do them cause they require me to build a world and with royalty aus specifically i love weaving together bits of political intrigue, or arranged marriages, etc. its so much fun!!
What do you hope your readers take away from your work? that if this world is too rough or too much, you can always escape from it. it might not be physical, but immersing yourself in a universe that's entirely different for a little while can help soothe you.
What do you do when you hit a rough spot creatively? usually i try and take breaks. the problem with that is that my breaks can go on for longer than i’d like and im trying to fix that. so my other solution is to read read read!! read as much as i can, or go back to books that i loved. ask myself what i liked about the writing, what are some parts that i thought were amazing examples of good writing - i note them down then see if i can apply that to my own work. another thing i do is take a break from writing my longer, fleshed out works and write blurbs! blurbs are a great way for me to write but not feel like its tedious because i don't have to spend as much time on them and it gets me into the groove of writing without feeling stressed out.
What is your favorite work and why? Your most successful? my favourite piece of work is miscommunication. it took me months to write that, even after i lost all the work halfway through, and its the longest piece of work i have written so far, so its kinda like my baby. my most successful is candy jar. its also the work i owe my blog exposure to - it was the first piece i published, and it was also the first piece of writing i did in around 4 years.
Who is your favorite person to write about? i don't have much out for them, but i really enjoy exploring mark’s and jeno’s characters. they're people, but in my work i enjoy analysing them and judging how they’d act in different contexts.
Do you think there’s a difference between writing fanfiction vs. completely original prose? the only difference for me is that fanfiction (depending on the fandom) has some of the stuff fleshed out for you already, such as the world its in. if youre the type to write AUs then the only thing you already have is the characters - the planning, the writing, the drafting, and everything else is still the writer's responsibility. therefore there isn't much of a difference between the two for me.
What do you think makes a good story?  a good story, to me, is one that takes me on a journey. it could be any genre, but i like to feel immersed and connected to the characters and the world in it. also aside from the obvious, like good grammar, a good story feels natural to read. i don't feel like skim reading half of it.
What is your writing process like? my writing process consists of me getting inspiration - usually from a song, or a film or a book ive read or a game ive played - i note down my idea and who i want the story to be about, and then bullet point the whole story, with some snippets of particular dialogue i want the reader or the other person to say at certain scenes. i then open another document ( i have a writing app on my phone, called werdsmith, so i use that!) and set a word count goal i want to hit so i can track my progress and start writing the fic, with fleshed out language and exposition. when im done (usually after a couple weeks up to a few months, depends on the length of the plan) i read through it to fix any mistakes, then i transfer it to docs so i can read it again and italicise any areas i feel need it.
Would you ever repurpose a fic into a completely original story? i...don't think so. mainly because the original fiction i read and would like to write for myself is predominantly fantasy, whereas the fanfic i write on my blog is usually non-idol, normal fics. 
What tropes do you love, and what tropes can’t you stand? im a SUCKER for enemies to lovers, royalty ofc, “and they were roommates”, and i think superhero aus are really cool but there isnt enough of them :( idol/you as member aus....not feeling her… also abo/werewolf/vampire aus….not feelin em
How much would you say audience feedback/engagement means to you? a LOT. a HUGE amount!! i said before how i like giving my readers somewhere where they can immerse themselves as an escape, even for a short while. hearing about how my work affected them, made them feel, makes me feel less insecure about what im writing and thus more confident to publish it.
What has been one of the biggest factors of your success (of any size)? i’d say reblogs. and also putting out more content. when i first uploaded candy jar i went to my one of my favourite writers (jaeminlore) and asked her if she'd be okay with reading it and giving feedback. to my surprise she loved it and her reblogging it to all her followers is literally what gave me a bunch of followers all of a sudden who loved what i’d written. to keep that momentum i created more and more content, and while i haven't uploaded as often as i've wanted to or written as much as i’d wanted to, i can say i have a good amount of work on my masterlist for people who are looking for more to read.
Do you think fanfic writers get unfairly judged? 100%. fanfic has an unfair reputation for just having bad writing and cringey fics (and i feel like this is because of the way society views the demographics who predominantly consume and create it), when in reality i feel like those who write fanfiction are extremely talented and selfless people. they're on the internet creating content for free for people to enjoy and like any other work of art they're putting time and effort into it. i think it should be respected. any form of art is going to have its good and bad sides.
Do you think art can be a medium for change? hmmm….yes. i feel it can be a way to reflect the thoughts of people and also be a way to inspire people to do more.
Do you ever feel there are times when you’re writing for others, rather than yourself? sometimes. sometimes i feel like i'm forcing myself to write because i feel like if i don't then people will forget about me or they’ll forget about my blog. while what i choose to write about is for me, i feel like the speed of my writing and what im writing isn't to the quality i want it to be cause i feel like i gotta get it out for people to read.
Do you ever feel like people have misunderstood you or your writing at times? i've never felt that way!
Do your offline friends/loved ones know you write for Tumblr? only 2 of my friends know, and i only told them like. a week ago!
What is one thing you wish you could tell your followers? i wish you guys would message me more! i'm quite a sociable person, and i’d love to have regular anons who talk to me 👉🏽👈🏽
Do you have any advice for aspiring writers who might be too scared to put themselves out there? i think one common thing amongst all writers is that we write what we want to read. so don't feel like nobody's gonna read your work, cause somebody will. you gotta act like your work is top tier even if someone says it isn't - always write the best you can, and just do it! like don't even give yourself time to overthink it, write that fic, make it look pretty, upload it onto tumblr and do not be afraid to ask your favourite fic writers to read your work once its up!! i’d be happy to read and give feedback for any fic writers as well so don't feel afraid! 
Are there any times when you regret joining Tumblr? ive been on here for 7 years….i grew up on this site lmfao. but i don't think i regret joining tumblr once.
Do you have any mutuals who have been particularly formative/supportive in your Tumblr journey? shes not very active anymore and i miss her very much but user hyuck-s was so supportive and i love her!!
Pick a quote to end your interview with:
she believed she could, so she did.
BONUS ROUND: K-POP CONFIDENTIAL 
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manggojooz · 5 years ago
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Pick A Side (Part 6)
pairing: Taehyung x reader
word count: approx. 2,900 
genre: university!au; angst; romance; slice of life stuff
warnings: references to school bullying; references to voyeuristic behaviour
previous part: Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5
taglist: @destiel1597 @mila271 @hopetookmysoul @ximaginx @honeyursosweet @coffeecupyoongs @bangtanbaesstuff
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“So you see, although it’s so tiny, it’s actually really good and the colours turn out really nice and saturated. You can even use it on a GoPro mount, a drone or a normal tripod. Oh wait, I have one aerial photo I took not long ago, let me show it to you...”, Haejoong digs out his phone to exhibit an aerial shot of a sunset, which he took using the tiny camera he was introducing to you.  
“Wow, that is beautiful! Guess I need to save up money to buy one of these little things. How can they be so small yet so expensive”, you pouted.  
As the two of you browsed the camera shop filled with a myriad of photographing equipment, someone called you on your phone. You always hesitated picking up unknown numbers but Haejoong was looking at you peculiarly so you decided to just pick it up.  
“Is this Y/N?”, the caller enquired in a stiff tone.  
“Yes, speaking”, at least you were able to conclude it was not a spam call.  
“I’m Helen from the Student Office, we need to speak to you about something urgently, is it convenient to drop by before close of business?”
You were puzzled as to why you were required to attend, and to be honest, a little scared. It must have been apparent on your face.  
“Who was that? Are you alright?”, Haejoong was concerned from seeing your expression.  
“It was the Student Office, they told me to go over before end of the day. I’m not sure what it’s about either, but she sounded really serious”, you said as you realised he was looking at you quizzically.  
“If you are worried I can go with you...”
“It’s ok, I...”, the worry on your face was growing proportionately to the number of worst case scenarios that you were imagining.  
“Y/N, remember what I said... you don’t have to do this alone, I’m on your side now”, he said as his voice radiated a sense of reassurance.  
---
You sat across from the lady known as Helen. Her forehead was all wrinkled up and her face was as stiff and angular as her voice.  
“Ms. Y/N, are you sure you want your friend to stay here instead of have him wait outside?”, Helen warned, “It’s going to be a difficult conversation to sit through.”  
Haejoong looks at you, waiting for your cue, as to whether he should stay or leave. You had no idea what got into you, whether it was trust you had in him or just your fear of facing the unknown alone. You just knew that you would rather he stayed. While there was a foreboding feeling, you haven’t done anything you had to hide, at least not after you entered this university.
“Yes, I'm sure, Ms. Helen, he can stay.”  
“Ok, if you say so, take a seat then, both of you...”. She takes a slow deep breath as though she was preparing herself for what was to come. The randomness of this intense situation that befell you is increasingly generating waves of anxiety within you.  
“It has come to our attention that someone has been circulating salacious photos of one of our students in a university-related forum. Some of these photos were taken from within the girls’ hostel and based on our preliminary investigations there appears to be some speculations... and I stress that, at this moment they are just pure speculations... that the person who took and uploaded the photographs is you, Ms. Y/N.”  
You had absolutely no idea what she was talking about and stared at her in confusion and horror, mainly confusion, from trying to understand what she just explained. She turns her computer screen to face you so that Haejoong and you could see what was reflected on it.  
The face of the victim was blurred out in the photographs, but from the clothing, the posture, the likeness, it was not difficult to identify her. It was Jihyun.  
Your hands snatched up the computer mouse, scrolling through the “evidence” to confirm your own speculation. There was no doubt it was her.  
The photos were voyeuristic to say the least. One showed her walking up a flight of stairs in a skirt, taken from below and was angled just enough to not fall into the category of indecent exposure but with ample room for suggestiveness. Who would do such a thing? Another series was zoomed closely into various parts of her body. Why were all of the photos of Jihyun? And then the most disturbing collection were taken of her in her room, through her window. There was even a video; although the curtains were drawn, her silhouette was cast on the curtains, and anyone would be able to tell that it was a video of her changing. What... why... how... And the speculations were that you did this?  
“This is really absurd. Why would Y/N do this? She’s not someone who would do something like this. There must be a misunderstanding”, Haejoong jumps in impatiently as he watches your speechless form frowning and gaping at the screen.  
“I know it now all sounds absurd, but as the issue has been reported by a few students and the victim is also aware of the matter, we have to conduct investigations. We just have to speak to anyone who may be involved in any way...”, Helen reaffirms that this was just part of the due process.  
You hastily scrolled down the forum page and the comments were as ludicrous as you thought the whole situation to be:  
“Isn’t that Kim Jih**n from the arts faculty? Woah she has a good body~”  
“Kekeke heard she stole someone’s boyfriend not long ago, is this how love rivals take revenge nowadays?”  
“Must have been taken by someone who has access to the girls’ dormitory, and wow look at that video!”
“Karmaaaa’s a bitch for her! Didn’t she steal Y*/N’s boyfriend recently? Heard Y*/N joined the photography club, lol. Didn’t you guys see her carrying around a huge camera with those paparazzi-like lenses?”
Yes, your dorm room was located in the block opposite from Jihyun’s and you stayed just one floor above her but...  
It feels all too familiar again, where do you even begin to defend yourself? And then you saw another comment that had received a tonne of upvotes:  
“Y*/N was a bully in high school too. People are just so consistent, look at how she’s bullying her ex-boyfriend's girlfriend now...”  
Your chest clenches tightly and so did your hands, your breathing was visibly heavier and the bridge of your nose seared, before tears welled up in your eyes. 
Haejoong darts across the room to where the tissue box was, bringing it back for you in a split second, and then fussing over you, “Y/N, stop reading those things.” He proceeds to snatch the mouse away from you to close the browser.  
Helen couldn’t help but sigh, “I’m sorry I had to call you here, but you know how such things are. It’s always very sensitive and if we didn’t even call you in for a talk like this, it will be difficult to explain ourselves. What more when there is no other lead, and your name keeps popping up in-”
“So you are just going to use her as a scapegoat?! All these are just speculations, rumours!”, Haejoong was starting to raise his voice and through your sniffling, you grabbed onto his arm, indicating for him to calm down.  
---
The ordeal was eventually over and you were only told to lie low, until they finish the investigations. You walked out of the Student Office in a daze, Haejoong following close beside you.  
“Y/N was a bully in high school too...” The words devoured you in every way possible.  
“Y/N”, a suppressed voice rang in your ears. “Y/N!”, a sharp tug, you were spun around and your face came an inch away from a vast whiteness. You snapped out of your daze and realise your nose was almost buried in Haejoong’s shirt-covered chest. You turn to look behind you and sees that you were just a hair’s breadth away from the edge of a flight of stairs.  
“You could have hurt yourself, walking like that”, your reliable companion chided. 
“You don’t seem to think it is possible that I was the one who did it. Why?”, you asked abruptly, your face tilting up to look at him, and your eyes peering into his. 
“What do you mean why? You wouldn’t do something like that.”  
“Something like what? How long do you even know me? How do you know what I’m capable of doing or not? I could have been a bully in high school like they said, and I could have done those things! How would you know that I didn’t!”, you felt like you were taking out your frustrations on him.  
“Fair enough, I don’t know you for very long. But I know that you are not a bully, and you definitely did not do those things to Jihyun”, he sounded like he was preaching your infallibility.  
“Why? Why are you taking my side so unconditionally? What if my side is the wrong side?”, you rebuked.  
“Then, I’ll stand with you on the wrong side, and we can make it the right one”, the speed of his words fast, the timbre of his voice strong.  
That is... not what you would want.  
“Why would you do that for me?”, you glowered.  
“Because I like you...”, he utters a weirdly-timed confession.  
That is... not right.
“... even if it really were you, you must have a reason for doing it. It takes two hands to clap, knowing Jihyun, she must have-”, he sounded more determined than ever.  
That is... a reasoning that will kill the victim twice.  
“Stop!”, you voice shook with outrage. “This is wrong. You are wrong... I must have made a mistake...”, you scoffed, more so to yourself.  
“About what?”, his forehead tightens to a frown of befuddlement.  
“About us.”
You spun around to run down the stairs without another word. He shouted after you but you ran away. From him. From yourself. From everything.  
---
The remaining days of the week saw you cooped up in your dorm room. Hiding from everyone. Hiding from yourself. Hiding from everything.  
It was eerily silent, even though on hindsight, there must have been various distantly annoying noises – knocking of the door, voices calling out to you or the ringing of your phone. Even if there were, you probably couldn’t hear it. Even if you had shed tears, you probably wouldn’t remember. The only capacity you had in those few days was overly occupied, by the past, and by your guilt for ever wanting to have anybody on your side.  
It is natural to think that your are always on the right side. It is natural to want people to take your side. It is natural to think that someone you like cannot be on the wrong side. But natural does not mean it is right.  
Yes, you have always wanted someone to choose your side. But no, if you are wrong then you don’t deserve anyone on your side. People who make mistakes do not deserve anyone on their side.  
Finally on one of the nights, the loud banging and shouting noises outside your door reached a decibel that was able to travel to your ears.  
Your unfocused eyes gazed toward the door, seeing it shake a little from whatever was banging on it. You strained your ears to try to hear what was going on, but all your senses were still a bit dulled. 
“Y/N! Y/N!”, a low male voice constantly booming through.  
“You can’t just come into the girls’ dorm like that! Do you hear me?”, a girl’s voice shrilly cuts through the sound barrier.  
“Y/N! Are you inside? If you are inside, will you just reply me?”, you finally recognises that it is Taehyung’s voice.  
You dragged your soulless body out of the bed and lugged it towards the door, not entirely in the state to bother about the whole fiasco happening outside.  
“Stop it now and get out, otherwise I have to call the security!”, the female counterpart threatened.  
“Y/N!”, he was still banging on the door constantly and right as he is about to land his fist on it again, you pull the door open, his fist almost landing on your face.  
---
“Are you okay? You are scaring me so much... Why do you look like this? Let’s go see a doctor...”, he rattles off, both of you now standing on the ground level outside the entrance to the dorm. But for the freezing wind blowing past you feeling slightly colder than your own body, you might have thought you were still asleep. 
“You must know why, has it not spread across the entire school yet? Why did you come looking for me?”
“I’m worried... you didn’t come to class and I asked around and nobody seems to have seen you for days. And all I thought about is what if something happened to you?”, his deep voice resonated with worry. 
“Does it matter? I did those bad things and you still care if something bad happens to me?”, you spat.  
“I don’t see how you would have done such a thing...”
Here we go again.  
“Kim Taehyung, stop it, you know nothing. How can you say that? Do you know how Jihyun would feel if she heard what you just said?”, you weakly glared at him through your fatigue.  
“If you really did it, why will you be here looking like you are on the verge of dying?”  
A scoff escapes your lips. “Are you going to just take my side now too? I have always wanted you to... only... not this time. Just go away, leave me alone. For all you know, it could all be true... what they say about me...”, your words stumbling.   
“I want to hear it from you. Is it true?”, he asks, the words echoing within his chest.  
“What if it is? Can you still stand on my side, even if it is wrong?”, you challenged. 
“I don’t want to stand on your side, Y/N, I want to stand by your side. I’m not here trying to pick the side that is wrong or right. Everyone makes mistakes. I just... don’t want you to be alone.
     If you really did those things... I guess then we will need to right the wrong, so let’s do it together. And... and if it can’t be fixed, then let’s suffer the consequences together. If you have to apologise, I'll apologise with you. If the world throws stones at you, I’ll get hit together.”  
He takes one step closer to you but you back away with three. So he stops where he is.
He watches as you struggle to come to terms with what exactly you wanted from anyone now. You didn’t feel like you were deserving of any support but if you really ended up with none... how long more can you survive?  
From amidst the concentration that he expended to observe you, Taehyung catches some ruffling noises coming from the second floor. He glances up towards the empty corridor and sees someone peeping out from behind the railings, the figure disappearing instantly. The next thing he knew, a pail is being tipped over right above you.  
“Y/N!”, he bellows. With two big strides, he dashes toward you, enveloping you into his slightly larger form.  
You heard a loud thud, the pail dropping onto the ground next to both of you. The icy cold water splashes onto your pants, biting slowly into your legs.  
Taehyung looks up sharply, attempting to catch a glimpse of whoever it was and yelling for someone to catch the rascal. Water was dripping down his completely drenched hair and coat onto your face.  
“Are you okay?”, he asks and you wonder what luxury he had to be worrying about you.  
“You are the one that’s all drenched! Did the pail hit you?” The days of reclusion have led to a very much delayed reaction from you but when you finally grasped the situation, you were horrified to see Taehyung’s current state.  
“I’m ok, it didn’t hit me anywhere”, he was still busy trying to wipe off all the water that had fallen onto your hair and face.  
In your head you heard your own voice saying:  
I have made mistakes. Everyone makes mistakes. People who make mistakes don’t deserve anyone to stand with them. We must all be lonely people.  
And then you hear his mellow voice say to you:  
No. Everyone makes mistakes. And the world is allowed to punish us. But whatever the world throws at you... let's get drenched in it together. I pick your side, not because it is right, not because my love for you makes it right... but because I don’t want to let you face your mistakes alone.  
---
The sun was shining again in the morning. At the bottom of the staircase landing, you notice the not very large metal letterbox that was marked with your room number was stuffed to the brim. You took out your keys and unlocked it, sweeping all the mail and spam into your arms.  
As you sorted through them to see if anything required urgent attention, a piece of paper slips from somewhere within the pile and floats to the ground. You bent down to pick it up, flipping it over, and scribbled in the scrawly handwriting were the following words:  
“Please don't say anything Reach my hand out to cover the mouth But in the end, spring will come someday The ice will melt and flow away”
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kewltie · 6 years ago
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Bc this is me we’re talking about, here are some infos about my non-existent hpverse bakudeku fic:
Mitsuki and inko are bffs (some even say soulmate), having met at Hogwarts and getting sorted into gryffindor in their first year they soon became fast friend bc mitsuki despite being terrifyingly beautiful (bc of her veela heritage) and powerful she wasn’t super popular due to mostly her temperament and force of personality but she does get her rapid fanclub. Inko was much adore by the student body and teachers bc how humble and kind she was despite being from a pureblood family, easily making her the head girl in her 7th year. Together the both of them were a force to reckon with, they were the talk of the school when they attend there and so much stories about their antics become legend bc mitsuki ‘the bad girl’ and inko the ‘good girl’ was such a weird combo nobody know how they remain the bestest of friends.
inko was from powerful magic family but she broke rank when she fell in love with a muggleborn (A SLYTHERIN MUGGLEBORN AT THAT). She like mitsuki is also a legacy Gryffindor so she was disowned for choosing her muggleborn boyfriend instead of a hundred of years of tradition. Mitsuki was the only one who support and stuck by her through it all and it’s kinda ironic to everyone that mitsuki is notorius as the rulebreaker in school but it is inko who turned back against everything to follow her heart. At least mitsuki married another Gryffindor pureblood but lol she didn’t chose her husband bc of that only bc her husband was the only one who was immune to her veela charm bc he was her soulmate.
ANYWAY, now on to the bakudeku who grew up side by side bc of their mothers and katsuki even as young as he was was extremely powerful. Maybe it’s bc of his blood line or maybe it’s his veela side but he always been blessed with powerful that seem bottomless while izuku for the first ten year of his life developed no magic at all. Everyone thought he was a squib bc of that and they whispered maliciously that is what you get for polluting the pure magic bloodline with dirty muggle blood :(((.
Katsuki knew at a v v v young age that izuku is his soulmate but bc izuku shown no sign of magic and katsuki as the spoiled much love son of an ancient pureblood family (WELL BOTH since his parents are both pureblood), he was arrogant and elitist thinking he was superior to izuku in everyway. He didn’t want izuku, THIS FAILURE, as his mate at all but no matter how much he fought it to his very core he can’t help being drawn to izuku by some greater force then he know how. Izuku never realize or find out that he and katsuki are mate. He just think he’s one of the few people who is immune to veela’s charm just like his mother.
Izuku finally get his magic power from all might later around the time Hogwarts start for them. All might was kinda curse/bless (???) with a spell that make his core magic to be able to pass down from one person to another. It has to do with AFO bc he’s the immortal dark lord who to helped his squib brother get magic power he STOLE it from others (AFO creating a spell that steal magic cores) and that’s how OFA was born. Izuku is the newest heir in the long line of people destine to face the dark lord who is v much ALIVE AND THRIVING in secret.
By the time bakudeku get to Hogwarts izuku and katsuki had a very tenuous relationship bc katsuki hated the fact that his mate is pathetic squib but then he suddenly developed magic and KATSUKI doesn’t know what to feel about it. On one hand that level the playing field b/t them a little bc izuku isn’t a pureblood and he got this idea in his head that muggle and wizards/witches are all equal despite their lack of magic bc he’d learned it from from his dad side when he got exposed to muggles and knows they aren’t all evil/weak. Bc katsuki came from a traditional house with thousands of years of magic and history at their back, katsuki grew up thinking he was superior to everyone else so izuku and katsuki often clash with their world/social views.
This make their relationship even more strain when katsuki (like the sorting hat barely touch HIS HEAD before it declare him a Gryffindor) saw izuku was sorted into hufflepuff instead of Gryffindor like him. It actually took the sorting hat one of the longest time to declare izuku’s house bc izuku share many strong traits from various houses (bravery, loyalty, smart, kind) houses that he could easily fall into any of them but in the end the sorting hat gave izuku a choice and he’d chosen hufflepuff bc that’s the house that often get overlook by others. AND IT’S ALSO THE HOUSE THAT KATSUKI HATES AND LOOKS DOWN UPON THE MOST. izuku admires katsuki deeply and would follow him anywhere but he realizes it’s time he carve out his own path and hufflepuffs are strong and noble just like the rest of the other houses and izuku will spent seven years proving to the rest of the school :DD.
With being from two diff houses, katsuki and izuku sorta STARTED an intense house rivaly b/t the two houses even though hufflepuffs lit get along with nearly everyone and never really get into interhouse fighting b.s. that other houses get. Katsuki immediately become one of the star of his house being that his family got a lot weight to throw around and that he’s also 1/8th veela. So many rumors and interest swirl around katsuki and he thrives on them, showing exactly how katsuki deserves to be one of the top students of the year. He’s particularly best at dueling & potion and placing in his house quidditch team the first year. Izuku, on the other hand, nobody really expected anything out of him but he consistent surprises everyone with being esp good at charm and transfiguration that outdo older students.
Izuku absolutely flourish in Hogwarts and is literally friends with many people in diff houses that izuku’s table is fill with other ppl from various houses bc izuku doesn’t really have strict view on house rivalry and who should hang with whom (his bestfriend ochako is from gryff and iieda is from ravenclaw; making the three of them the ‘golden trio’). People even whisper it’s like inko is back in school again and EVERYONE LOVES INKO. Katsuki is almost equal in term of popularity to izuku mainly bc he consistent outperform many people of his age group and even ABOVE in spellworks, power, and dueling. he’s also exceedingly attractive bc of his veela heritage so he always got a flock of fans wherever he go…. It’s just his prickly personality that keep him from being uh too popular lol.
Katsuki, SLOWLY and surely, spent the years watching izuku really grew into his own through many trials thrown at him bc izuku despite being a hufflepuff (a house that isn’t known for any notoriety) is a trouble magnet and get into ALL SORT OF HIGHJINKS. Followers of the dark lord attempting to kill/sabatoge/kidnap izuku bc of OFA and katsuki get pisser with every attempt bc HOW FUCKING DARE THEY TOUCH HIS MATE????!!!!!! It’s not like katsuki suddenly get over his bigot and elitist mentality but with exposure from his housemates and the rest of the school, he slowly understand how warped his world views was but it doesn’t make it easier for him to accept that izuku IS HIS MATE only bc katsuki hate the idea of anything being force upon him and that he can’t chose who he can be with and also THAT IZUKU can’t choose him either. The thought of alone keep him up some nights when he is plague with doubt that izuku would never choose him if they weren’t bonded with each other…
Izuku still doesn’t realize they’re mate bc katsuki never told him and izuku is… uh very oblivious but around their fifth/sixth year katsuki’s attitude slowly change around him. He becomes more attentive and careful with izuku which suprises him at first but he just thought katsuki wants to become friends again lmao. In katsuki’s case though, IZUKU nearly died in one run in way the dark lord and katsuki lost it when he thought izuku was dead and he never ever want to feel that helpless and utter despair again know that he know what it mean to him to lose izuku bc he had been in love with izuku all along. So yea IT’S TIME FOR VEELA’S COURTING BULLSHIT :DDD.
Veela despite their frail beauty is actually a magical creature that v v v much like a bird of prey; they’re fighters and volatile. Katsuki to show izuku that HE IS A GOOD THE BEST MATE, constantly show off in class and dueling (beaTing izuku in the process lmao) that he can provide and strong enough to protect izuku. HE gives izuku one of his feathers as a gift knowing how much izuku loves his wings ever since they were children even though GIVING FEATHERS pretty much mean I WANNA MARRY YOU AND MATE FOR LIFE but izuku didn’t know that.
The slow seduction/courtship of izuku was the most agonizing and difficult thing ever for katsuki. Taking on four dark lords would be easier than courting izuku bc katsuki does It in the most roundabout way possible; HE’S BASICALLY COURTING IZUKU W/O EVERY REVEALING THAT HE’S COURTING IZUKU and everyone to their friends and parents just sigh v v v v v deeply bc WHY YOU GOT TO MAKE IT THIS HARD. But katsuki wants to win izuku over through brute force of affection, gifts, and interest in him instead of some bullshit destiny thing like mate.
izuku loves katsuki since they were children but he ISNT’ IN LOVE WITH HIM until much later in their sixth year when katsuki risk it all to save him in the triwizard tourntament. IZUKu actually was selected as one of the champion (which pisses KATSUKI OFF SO MUCH but he’s older now and mature enough not to hate izuku for it) and in one of the trail izuku nearly lost his life once more and katsuki was the one who jumped in to save him WHICH IS HILARIOUS BC THAT’S THE OPPOSITE OF WHAT SUPPOSED TO HAPPEN BC KATSUKI IS THE ONE WHO GOT KIDNAPPED AS HIS ‘MOST TREASURE PERSON’ which izuku had no clue about but once he realize how true that was.... it was game over for izuku bc he’s finally opened his eyes to what katsuki been LITERALLY COURTING HIM SINCE THEIR FIFTH YEAR lol.
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themattress · 6 years ago
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More bullshit from Mod A in regards to Xion.  Mod M is more reasonable (although I question if toxic male fandom does hate anything that reads like fanfiction at first glance...I think that if it reads like the kind of fanfiction they like, then they’ll eagerly accept it. I like to consider myself equal opportunity in this regard: if it reads like any kind of bad fanfic, then I dislike it.)
I’m with @riniuchihaa here. For me, Xion, far from being the best KH character, was the first glaring neon warning sign that the series was going off-course, that an original character was being created for the sake of it despite not being able to impact much of anything given her placement, and then was not ever let go of even though the excuse given as to why she was forgotten by KH2 should have rendered it impossible for her to appear in the series again.
“not a damsel in distress, action girl or sex object”
Is she not those things, though?  She has to be rescued or protected several times throughout the game. She wields a Keyblade and can even be better at it than Roxas if she’s absorbed enough of his strength. And there are a lot of creepy guys online that will argue that she is sexy, particularly with KH3′s model of her suggesting that she’s not wearing anything underneath that coat, which is open all the way to just above her chest. By KH3, she’s even taken Namine’s “plot device to make convoluted shit happen” status. If anything, people take issue with her being all of those things, and not even being them as well as other KH girls. She’s very derivative with little to add for herself.
“she’s a regular human being with a regular human emotional arc”
I would actually say that of Xion in the manga.
In the game, I think this is a case of projecting. Xion’s personality and arc are written as such a blank slate, with more people talking about Xion and what she’s going through than her and it being onscreen, that it’s easy to project on to. But when looked at objectively, there isn’t much humanity to it at all.
Ask yourself this: what is Xion like when she’s not around Roxas and Axel, doing missions and eating ice cream? What are her likes and dislikes, her own personal hobbies or aspirations? What are her feelings on matters completely unrelated to her friends?  For the life of me, I can’t come up with an answer. The closest I can get is with the text of her Secret Reports, where she honestly shows more character than she actually shows in the game itself (but then, that’s the same with Roxas and his Diary entries.) 
Before her identity crisis kicks in, all of Xion’s scenes are shared with Roxas and/or Axel, in the context of missions, ice cream, and being good friends with them, simply going along with whatever they’re doing and saying. Any feelings of inadequacy she feels during periods of time where she’s “malfunctioning” are skimmed over, and again is talked about more by other people than by her. Once her identity crisis happens, any scene she has apart from Axel and Roxas either still works them in somehow (they are consistently her biggest motivations in her own personal conflict, the only reason she’s conflicted about her existence is because of them since they give her a reason to exist) or just focuses on her freaking out about the fact that she’s a replica whose personality was formed based on the fragmented memories of another person that leaked into Xion through that person’s Nobody, which makes her less fit to exist than those who aren’t meant to exist. Yeah, totally a regular human emotional arc right there!  Can’t count the number of times in the history of the human species that people have had to go through that!
Kairi in KH and Namine in COM actually felt like human beings with emotional arcs in spite of their extraordinary circumstances. Xion feels more like KH2′s Kairi and Namine, where I get the basic trope behind their personalities and development, but can’t really pin them down as three-dimensional and realistic. That’s Xion - the writing for her is very trope-y, not human. The main points of how she was written were three-fold: as a plot device (a means of getting Roxas from point A to point B), as a wish-fulfillment character (she’s basically Tomoko Kanemaki’s self-insert), and as an exploration of a theme (the “What Measure is a Non-Human?” theme that Kanemaki is obsessed with). The humanity being inferred in regards to her being a trans girl case study was not at all intended to be there, and it can only happen because she was sketched thinly enough for it to be applied to her. 
“complains that she’s taking too much space or stealing the spotlight”
I’m sorry, but this is a valid complaint. When it was announced there was going to be a game about Organization XIII set between COM and KH2, everyone was wanting and expecting more development and focus on the members who had already been firmly established, most of whom were in desperate need of such development and focus. So to suddenly have Xion introduced and be the major focus of the game, whether she’s actually on-screen or not, would be very jarring and disappointing. 
What’s worse is all the games she pops in after Days, as not only does it destroy the established rules of canon in regards to her fate, but she ultimately steals the spotlight in an even more harmful way in KH3: Kairi, the original KH girl, who had been receiving build-up for YEARS as a Keyblade-wielding Guardian of Light, is literally screwed out of this role in favor of Xion, her Mary Sue copycat whom no-one asked for to begin with and whom many people weren’t keen on having return, as not only did it destroy the main thing she had going for her (her nature as a tragic character) but it robbed Kairi of development and focus that, again, she was in desperate need of. But Xion got over 30 more votes than Kairi in a Japanese popularity poll, so...priorities?
“Xion’s story is about the right to define her own existence, to live as her own true self, etc.”
No, that’s not what Xion’s story was about. It was about her learning that she had no right to her existence because it was actively hurting the existences of others, including her best friends’, and that the right thing to do is to disappear. I take some issue with how it played out (mainly that Xion accepts this way too easily and becomes a “Too Good For This Sinful Earth” type who does the right thing for the sake of her friends even when a more angry, selfish and conflicted Xion would’ve been more engaging and human, and that Riku is OOC in his treatment of her considering his treatment of Roxas), it was still incredibly tragic and it owned that. So for that tragic story to be undone in favor of a “lol, just kidding, Xion can exist and get a happy ending with her friends after all, no tragedy here!” way of appeasing the fans who called foul and raised a stink about it (especially in Japan) will never sit right with me, especially when the writing doesn’t even TRY to justify it. It just happens for the sake of it.
“It has a lot to do with the fact that Xion is a young girl whose story expects us to genuinely empathize with her”
OK, here’s a tip: it is rarely EVER a good idea to expect your audience to all feel a certain way toward something and try to force that reaction. “Death of the Author” is a thing, which is why you’re best not taking sides or playing favorites when making a story, you’re better off putting your personal feelings aside and just letting things play out, allowing people in the audience to make up their own mind. When the story pushes for the audience to genuinely empathize with Xion, with lines by others such as “poor Xion!”, then it’s not surprising that the opposite effect happens: some fans don’t like or empathize with her because they resent the hamfisted attempts at being told that they should. 
“That’s like saying Kairi didn’t matter in KH1 because Sora forgot her in COM”
That’s a false equivalence if I ever saw one. KH came out before COM, and Sora didn’t forget her so much as she was replaced by someone else, Namine, in his memory, which drove that story’s conflict. Its resolution was Sora learning the truth and remembering Kairi again. Kairi is still a factor in COM, a very important factor at that. Days came out after KH2, where there isn’t even a hint of Xion, she is not a factor in that game because she wasn’t invented yet. Sure, Xion matters to Days, but that mattering doesn’t feel like it amounts to much when she isn’t seen, heard from or mentioned for the entirety of the game it was leading up to.
“But so what?”
So, it feels incredibly unnatural to have a character jammed into a pre-existing timeframe and pre-existing dynamic prior to KH2, with mass amnesia being used as a plot device to explain away why she wasn’t present in any way in KH2, only for every game taking place after KH2 (and thus after Days was made) to suddenly start featuring Xion again, with the mass amnesia plot device being casually discarded. What’s worse is how canon rules were obliterated so that Xion could return in KH3 and reverse the tragedy element that made her story effective to begin with, at the expense of characters like Kairi who have been around longer than Xion and who desperately needed exposure more than Xion. Seriously, in addition to the point I already raised about Xion taking Kairi’s place, just think about this: characters that were created as a trio, Sora, Riku and Kairi, are no longer a trio, just the duo of Sora and Riku, while characters that were created as a duo, Roxas and Axel, are now a trio thanks to Xion. It feels like a slap in the face to all the fans who liked Kairi and the Destiny Trio, and it’s a big reason as to why Xion’s inclusion in the series feels like a mistake to those fans and thus why she’s such an off-putting character to them.
The only statements made here that I agree with is that Xion sadly wouldn’t have gotten as much hate if she was a badass, older male character, that her being forgotten due to memory magic isn’t really a mark against her since that’s a cheap plot device that happens to a lot of characters in the series, and that you can’t really do the story of 358/2 Days without her since she’s so integral to it...but on that note, the story of 358/2 Days didn’t need to happen. The KH series during its early days was meant to be Sora, Donald and Goofy’s story, so leaving the period of time where they were asleep a blank made perfect sense. We never needed to know about Roxas’ time in the Organization beyond what was said and shown in KH2, and to this day I honestly wish we hadn’t.  In game form, anyway. The manga is great, it can stay!
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thatsrightmytrash · 7 years ago
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Mine
Anonymous asked: Bad boy au / Jimin + 22 Love your writing btw!
;pairing — Jimin x reader
;warnings — smut (I couldn’t contain myself)
;word count — 3k
;Prompt —  “You can’t just say that and then disappear!” 
A/N: I’m sorry if this wasn’t what you imagined anon, It’s hard for me to picture Jimin as a bad boy, I think he was more just like a fuckboy here, anyways I hope you like it :) Also, the ending is cheesy af I know!! lol
Before starting your freshman year of college you had one thing clear in your head; no fuckboys. You were gonna study, pass your exams, make new friends, and live an easy and relaxed student life, well as relaxed as being an architecture major at college could be.
You didn’t want to be one of those persons who start college and the only thing they do is go to parties, get high and fuck every guy they see, because you were here to mainly study and get your diploma and you knew that getting involved with guys would mean losing track of your original plan of living a calm student experience.
But you would see that exact plan be thrown down in the form of a sturdy, cocky, obnoxious but beautiful fuckboy.
You met said dance major at the third party you attended to – yes, one of those parties you said you weren’t going to participate in. Your new roommate and friend Yerin would call herself a socialite, a more fancy way of saying that she liked guys sticking their tongues down her throat in dark corners of packed frat houses.
She would drag you down telling you that it wouldn’t be a complete student experience if the only thing you were going to do was spend your time at the dorms watching Netflix and getting fat, her words, not yours.
So you accepted, a party never kill nobody, right? The first two parties were pretty chill, nothing you haven’t seen before at high school, but how wrong you had been at thinking that this one was going to be more of the same.
The Kappa Sigma house was huge, and entering the place was a sight that had you on the edge of running back to the comfort of your dorm and your bed, Yerin acted quickly on giving you some buzz to calm your nerves and it worked.
Most of the night was spent drinking and dancing with Yerin, occasionally making small chat with some random dude but what you knew next was that you were pinned against a wall making out with a guy you didn’t know, you let loose, had his mouth on you for a while, and it was all fun and games until you found yourself waking up beside him, a pounding in your head and your heart doing a slip at the revelation of seeing his face, you knew right then and there that you were completely and utterly fucked because you knew something was for sure; Park Jimin wasn’t someone you could fuck and forget the next day.
The thing that surprised you was that after that night you thought you were never going to see his face again, because c’mon… you knew how men like Park Jimin functioned, he was a major player, the true definition of one, fucking a different girl every night, making them believe that he cared for them only to use them and move on to the next one. And you knew for sure that morning you woke up next to him that you were going to be one more girl on his list of fucks.
But you weren’t, well… somehow, what started as nothing but a drunk one night stand turned into something regular, you don’t know how or when it happened, but you found yourself in his sheets more often than not, and in the way you began to discover a side of him you thought you were never going to be able to see.
Yes, you were fuck buddies with Park fucking Jimin, and you knew that was gonna end in only one possible way; you falling for him.
“Hey babe, horror and nachos today?” the blonde haired men asked you through the phone, you knew more than to let the pet name get to you, but even when you tried not to, it would make a pool of heat travel down to the pitch of your stomach.
“Yes, but not the-“
“The spicy ones, I know, you hate them.” He interrupted you, how did he know that? You didn’t have a clue, this was the first time he offered taking nachos.
“See you in a few.” With that you locked the device and throw yourself on his couch, It had been almost 7 months since you started doing this with Jimin, and it was turning more domestic, being friends with him meant that you didn’t see each other only to fuck, even when it did happen often also meeting with him to just talk or watch a movie was something that was becoming a common occurrence, and you didn’t know if you wanted it or not because it would mean falling for him harder than you had already fallen.
You would try to lie to yourself and to Jimin, but you already were head over heels for him, how could you not when he was sweet, intelligent, funny and he seemed to truly care for you, words of a monogamous relationship between the both of you had gone unspoken, when you started fucking with him almost every week you knew that you weren’t going to be more than that to him, someone he could be friends with and fuck in the meantime.
He would tell about the girls he fucked, laughing about some girl that didn’t know how to properly do a blowjob or some other girl that cried when he told her that he was gay, just so she would stop texting him, and college was like high school in the sense of news travelling fast, when you didn’t go out he would found someone else to fuck, and the next morning you would wake up knowing exactly which girl he had fucked this time.
You wondered if he told things about you to other girls or to his friends, if you were just like them in the end.
It hurt you, it hurt you because he was more than that to you, seven months could mean so little to most people, but for you they meant a lot when in every one of them Jimin had been by your side, that time you failed one of your most important exams, the night you received a call from your parents telling you that your dog- the one you got when you were only 5 had passed away, the uncountable times you were upset about something or just stressing over college. He was there, always.
But you let the feelings go to the back of your mind and you bottled everything up, you were a friend to him, yeah… a friend he could fuck but nothing more.
You waited for him at his place, he had had to go to one if his practices earlier in the day and he insisted on you staying, alleging that after all you would have to go back to his for movie night, and it was easier to wait for an hour or so for him to get back.
You heard the door being opened and you turned your head to its direction to find Jimin in all his glory; damped hair, loose shirt, and some black sports shorts that didn’t help you at containing your urge to gawk at him.
“Like what you see?” he smirked.
“Did you take a shower after practice? Good, because I didn’t want to smell your sweat”. You retorted rolling your eyes.
He only chuckled at your comment and rushed to enter the place, but at last minute he said “That’s not what you say when we are sweating in my bed”.
The movie was beyond boring and it ended with the two of you making out, you on top of his lap, moving in circles, feeling his cock getting harder.
“Fuck babe, don’t tease me” he moaned before biting your neck, making your pussy throbbing in need for him.
Like he knew exactly what was going through your mind he moved his hand from your right breast to the waistband of your pants, opening the button, and letting his fingers play for a second before going down to where you needed them to be.
“Ah, Jimin!” You let out a loud groan when he started rubbing your clit in circular motions.
“You like that huh? You want more?” You nodded eagerly biting your lips in pleasure.  He smirked and added “You have to talk, tell me what you want.”
“Fuck Jimin, I- I want you” You stammered. “I want you I-inside of me.” You tossed your head back in pleasure and Jimin only accelerated the pace of his fingers, inserting one inside of your already wet core.
“You are already so wet and tight for me.” He growled, adding another finger, making you gasp and hold to his shoulders.
“I can only imagine what it feels like to have my cock inside of you.” You lowered one of your hands and palmed him through the fabric of his shorts.
He was rock solid and you could only drool at the feeling, you lowered his pants and let his erection spring free, the tip covered in pre cum.
You lip your bit and started rubbing it between your fingers, making Jimin moan out loud, getting his fingers out of you, you stopped too and whined at the loss “Why did you stop?”.
He bucked his hips into you, telling you what he wanted. Your pants doing little to help you contain the feeling. “Get your clothes off” he commanded.
Standing up from him you hastened to take your clothes off, throwing your pants along your panties in one motion, and positioning yourself once again on his lap, helping him pulling his shirt over his head.
Feeling his cock rubbing at your entry, he cupped your face with both hands and kissed you, biting down on your lip, sucking it into his mouth, and before you could say something he shoved his cock inside of you making you gasp at the sudden entrance.
You were already so wet that it didn’t take long for you to get use to the stretch, his eyes rolling to the back of his head when he started moving, he tossed his head back, his neck in exposure for you to kiss him in his sensitive spot near his ear, making him groan in pleasure.
“Babe, you are so wet, fu-fuck so tight” you moaned as you listened to his words, sinking yourself into him.
The sight was something you could never get used to, each time it was like seeing something you had never seen before, his abs and hips moving while he pumped deeper into you, grabbing you from the waist to sink you as deep as he could, hitting your g-spot.
“Fuck, fuck right the- ah!” all that left your lips were grunts with every thrust of his hips, sound of skin hitting skin resounded through the place, making you cry as you came all over his cock, clenching your walls as your orgasm travelled through your body.
“Come for me Jimin, I want you to fill me up” you whined at the overstimulation, he let a series of moans and grunts out of his mouth, like a melody to your ears, it didn’t matter that you were sensitive after coming, you still moaned at the sensation.
“Fuck y/n!” You clenched your walls once more and he released inside of your throbbing pussy, filling you up with his cum, he thrusted inside of you a few more times before slipping out, his seed coming out of you, a couple of  thick white drops landing on his cock.
You got up from his lap and lay down on the couch besides him, both of you exhausted from the activity, he lethargy stood up, put his shorts on and then grabbed a wet towel and positioned himself between your legs to clean his drying cum of your entrance.
While he went to put the towel into the laundry basket, you dressed up, after watching a movie, making out and having sex it was time to go home. Usually Jimin told you to stay the night at his place but you thought that it was better not to, spending the nights tangled in his arms, his warm chest against your back… it was something you would die for, but not like this, not when he felt nothing for you more than a friendship.
“Hey are you going home?” He asked, furrowing his brows as he watched you grab your things.
“Um, yeah, I need to wake up early tomorrow” you lied.
“Why don’t you stay here? My place is near to college and I don’t want you going alone to your door at this hour of the night”. He paused for a moment and added “I can make you breakfast tomorrow morning” He smiled and his eyes turned into half-moons.
You doubted, his proposition was beyond tempting but before you could answer his phone buzzed “Oh, can you give me my phone? It must one of the guys”.
You grabbed the phone from the coffee table and took a look to the screen, it was not one of the guys
-Sana: When are you free to repeat what we did last time?
Your face turned serious in an instant and you were not going to stay to watch what else she had to say, fuck you didn’t even want to know what she meant with “last time”.
“Yeah, you know what? I better go home” you snapped and Jimin looked at you confused at your sudden reaction, you sharply handed him the phone, and you saw how his face contracted in panic.
You should have been more precautious, shouldn’t have gotten so close to him, you knew he fucked other girls but you tried to not think about it, after all you were nothing serious to him, you weren’t exclusive, you couldn’t complain.
“Listen, I- I know how this looks like-“
“No, you don’t have to explain me anything, you are not my boyfriend.” You grunted, you didn’t want him to make excuses, you just wanted to leave or you will end up making a mistake.
You turned around to leave but Jimin foresaw your movement and grabbed your wrist before you could take one more step. “Don’t go like this, let’s just talk.”
You turned around, releasing your wrist from his hands like it was fire melting your skin. “There is nothing to talk Jimin!” you shouted.
“I know I’m nothing more than a fuckbuddy to you, I know this past 7 months didn’t meant anything to you!” you quavered for a moment “and- and that I will never be able to call you mine and only mine because you don’t feel for me… like I feel for you” the moment that the words slipped from your lips you knew you had fucked up, the thing you had tried to hide from you and him not being a secret anymore.
You felt like a weight had been lifted up from your shoulders, at this point you didn’t care if he knew the truth because sooner or later he will have known and you would have had to go, better now than later when you would be even more whipped for him, right?
Jimin stayed silent and that was all you needed to rush out of his place and never turn back.
A week had gone by and you were starting to assume that your short “relationship” with Jimin was over, you weren’t gonna lie, you felt like shit, he wasn’t just a random guy, he was Jimin, all the good times you spent together were going to never happen again, but you had never been someone to wallow on self-pity, you knew what you had gotten into when you started fucking regularly, fuck you knew it the morning after you had fucked for the first time.
It meant at least that the weeks- months of pretending to be okay with him and your relationship, the other girls and everything, things that actually stressed you out and drove you crazy at times were done.
You stayed at your dorm, avoided visiting places where you two would use to go, you still had to attend classes, but since he was a dancing major his classes were on the other side of campus, you knew that you couldn’t avoid him for much more time but for the time being you preferred to stay this way.
You had even blocked his number, not because you thought he was gonna text you, you did it in self-preservation because you knew you would text him to apologize and you didn’t want to embarrass yourself even more.
You were about to leave you dorm to buy ice cream when then someone knocked at your door, you opened without looking through the peephole in consequence you didn’t know that Jimin was the one at the other side of your door, he had eye bags, his head was hanging low and looked overall fucked up, like he was hangover.
“Can I come in?” He whispered looking at you with an expression you couldn’t pin point.
You didn’t want to, he had nothing to say and you didn’t want to hurt anymore, you wouldn’t be able to bear being rejected by him once more.
But you let him in, his eyes were begging you and you couldn’t resist.
“Thank you for letting me in”.
“Ji-Jimin why are you here, I don’t want to-“ He took a step closer and gently put his finger on your lips.
“Sh, let me talk please.” He took his finger away of your lips and looked to the floor. “You didn’t let me explain last time.” You were about to tell him that there was nothing he needed to explain but he spoke first again.
“You can’t just say that and then disappear!” You frowned in confusion, what was he talking about?
“You can’t tell me that you feel… that you feel something more for me and then leave, block my number and never appear again.” He sighed and continued “I went to the coffee shop you spend your Saturdays at, that bench on the park that you like to sit on on sunny days to read a book, I came here a few times but you were never home, and I didn’t know what else to do…”
You were startled, not even once you went with him to the coffee shop or the bench at the park, you had told him about him once or twice but you didn’t think he would remember something so mundane.
“I know that what you saw looks terrible but believe me that I’m not fucking that girl, or anyone besides you, not since months ago… I stopped fucking around with other girls a month after meeting you, that text you saw… the last time she was referring to has been a long ago, way before I met you, sometimes girls text me things like that, I’m not gonna lie, but I don’t answer them, I don’t need to when I have you….”
You were beyond speechless not quite understanding what all meant. “I- I don’t understand.” You stammered.
Jimin sighed and took a step closer to you, this time his hands were cupping your face, and he was looking you straight in the eyes. “I’m guess that what I’m trying to say is that I like you… and that I want to be with you, I know I’m hard to trust, a fuckboy you would say but that changed the morning I woke up next to you for the first time.”
You studied his face, you could tell that he was being serious, but was he someone you could trust? After all… you had so many doubts.
Jimin saw right through you and hastened to speak again. “Give me a chance to do things right, I will never hurt you, I will take care of you, I want to be the best man I can be for you and only you…” you closed your eyes and let him peck your lips once, twice, three times before you whispered “ Mine and only mine?”
And with a real kiss this time he sealed the deal “Yes, yours and only yours.”
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rqs902 · 5 years ago
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this became just a random summary of my thoughts on mainly yu gengyin (with other kids sprinkled in lol) throughout various episodes of season 2, which may or may not be presented in any sort of logical flow or order, just a warning.... 
i feel like yu gengyin is normally a calm boy, pretty direct, but keeps his composure. but this pose right here, i can relate to his contempt for zhou wen HAHAHHAHHAHAAHAHA HES SO DONE HAHHAHAHA
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i havent even started the episode yet but i saw they’re gonna perform exo’s wolf and just started LAUGHING HAHHAHAHAHHAHAHA I NEVER HTGOUHT HAHAHH NOT THIS SONG HAHHAHAHHAHA
tbh im totally ok with leo not choosing ygy HAHAHAHAHHAHA no offense to him, but he’s not very good at playing the super idol game, so hopefully ygy can shine stronger elsewhere. i feel like this show doesnt show him enough appreciation yet. 
HAHAHAHAH YGY IN THE SAME GROUP AS CXK YES IM THRIVINGGG 
suddenly leo’s team got very strong lol 
but pyj hating hd still lol.... but its ok they have wmt even tho they got a bunch of new kids and the most useless new kid lol.....
i was just complaining about lack of ygy but suddenly there are more flashes to ygy on screen lol... amazing... but he does look really nice in this color
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WHEN YGY GOT NOMINATED TO BE ELIMINATED MY HEART BROKE 
but tbh for the remainder of the ep i more worried about freaking wumuti looking like he was freaking dying gosh he shouldve gone to rest or something, they really didnt need him to keep standing there after he finished performing. freaking muti pulled off an amazing performance despite his condition and as soon as he exited that stage persona, he literally looked like he was so weak and so pale i was like oh gosh let the boy rest!!! ugh but yea i refuse to believe / am in denial that ygy may possibly get eliminated so i am refusing to think about it LOL. anyway now on ep 6 they literally keep giving him screentime. zfz literally saying the purpose of this mission is to “save ygy” and cxk talking about giving ygy a special role in their perf so he can shine ;_; i love friendship 
but im not complaining about extra ygy time ehehehheh he looks like a prince for this stage and i love how he’s still smiling brightly throughout the ep and when aya brought up his status of being nominated for elims he was like ‘can you not say it out loud” and it was jokingly and he was smiling but the downward motion he made with his hands, i was like ah he is trying not to cry?
its interesting bc im almost grateful at least now ygy will get some more attention
wow look how stylish wu muti was in 2016 
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oof watching ep 7 was painful..... it felt like an ultimate low for gengyin, and even tho we all teared up when zfz was eliminated.... it kinda made sense when he was talking about the colors and how he liked his own color so maybe hes just not meant to be in a boy band and i can agree... ahhhh side note fangzhou and yifan’s friendship ahhhh it makes so much sense why they’re still so close today.... even tho im still SO MAD that deng qiang is still here and fangzhou had to leave.... episode 8 was really FINALLY the break that this team as a whole really needed and im SO HAPPY and relieved for them 
this entire season has felt like a low for gengyin, like torture for him, and he really hasn’t gotten a break to shine or to feel success and i feel like to be in that kind of a slump for like 2 months??? thats so sad... and im sure that takes a toll on your mental health. but despite it all, despite being passed up for getting chosen for the special stage, he still was rooting for daidai so cutely like the way he used a silly voice to chant “戴隊戴隊” and so wholeheartedly exclaimed “戴戴太感人了~ 媽呀! 唱得快撕裂了你知道嗎’ I mean, honestly he could’ve easily and understandably felt salty that daidai got that opportunity (even tho we all know gengyin has more vocal ability), but he didn’t. it felt like he truly and fully supported his friend and teammate and that already had my heart going oof 
BUT THEN. then watching their practice footage and just watching him regain his confidence and then finally FINALLLYY perform like he was truly enjoying being on stage. after 8 freaking episodes, FINALLY its yu gengyin’s time to shine and i am THRIVING!!! ahhhhhhhhhh i literally stopped after their team’s perf to just absorb all the amazing things they said about him, about his vocals and high notes, and about his dancing improving, and about his rapping being so next level for him, and about his stage presence being the best hes been yet. and the comment the teacher made about how yu gengyin’s personality is just so nice and 善良 that he has had difficulty portraying a powerful stage presence and today he finally saw it, and i think he was just so perfect, im so proud and so happy!!!!!! and wow this stage is everything to me. cxk’s stage presence is already so strong (and btw i loved how kunkun so confidently said “ygy is our main vocal. he will no doubt stand on stage very confidently and perform well” -- i LOVE how much faith cxk has in gengyin, despite all the setbacks gengyin’s faced recently) and the choreo - they made it work for them and you could see them work together and i loved the way liu ye just literally SAW gengyin’s confidence. he saw how gengyin was just somehow so handsome on this stage and i think that says a lot about how much someone’s mental state can truly impact their performance. it hurt my heart to hear ygy describing being at risk for elimination for the past 3 weeks as feeling like he was physically weighed down by the immense pressure. he just seemed so tired, but at least within the last 2 eps the show has taken the time to really highlight how gengyin’s been practicing late at night alone, trying not to let down his team mates and really trying to improve himself. (ugh the fact that he had been practicing his high notes secretly all this time but never got to show it until he broke his voice...) But yes, i literally just watched their team’s performance and paused to type this all out and now im gonna go back and watch their whole segment again, because i love seeing yu gengyin’s transformation and this confident side of him. how can you not love his smile (and the way that they captioned this as "yu gengyin’s signature smile” :’)
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man ep 8 is like THE time to be a ygy stan bc hes literally thriving and shining and getting all this screen time and attention and its so well-deserved and ive just been waiting 8 eps but we’re finally here :’) and yes its now official that ygy is my bias on this show i cant turn back now hahHHAHAHHA ive invested too many emotions into this child and you best bet i just changed my phone lock screen to also be ygy HAHHAHAHA its actually the top photo from the pic i just pasted above, bc this performance, that SMILE is EVERYTHING 
but also on a darker note, the whole conflict between wu muti and huadi is making me uncomfortable.... honestly i feel bad that ive been hoping their team loses but thats mainly just bc i need deng qiang to get eliminated which would require their team to lose LOL but also this whole thing between muti and huadi is getting out of control and their tempers are p concerning... like tbh we all know huadi has a temper but like muti is firey too and he’s like at a point where he just keeps yelling and being rude so im like theyre both just being rude to each other and its to the point where its starting to affect their team work... oh noo. sigh... from the beginning i thought huadi and muti’s dance styles were so different that they may clash bc theyre both going to try to lead dance practice, but this is way worse, this is their personalities clashing and its much scarier than i expected. 
also poor pinlin... man he like got super shafted during the first season imo and now he has to leave season 2 bc of his super serious injury.... ugh seeing his tears of frustration hurt my heart... he has so much talent and deserves more opportunity to show it :( but man his waist injury sounds so bad. the main bright side to all this is zuo qibo getting peer pressured into stepping up as a main vocal and really improving and getting some time to shine too. in season 1, back from when muti was like ‘noo i dont wanna be compared to qibo, hes a good singer’ until now, i dont think we’ve reaaalllyyy gotten too much of an opportunity to appreciate qibo’s vocal abilities because hes not had too much exposure and hes been overshadowed by the kids who have already established their strong vocal abilities. im scared hes under a lot of pressure now, as their leader and main vocal, but im glad hes been doing so well so far, good for him :’) im looking forward to seeing him improve and get more appreciation. i remember he was one of the most popular kids at the end of season 1 (along with cxk and wmt i think?) so i want to believe that he can live up to it. also this is random, but his visuals are really growing on me, like i can see him as a visual now and i think he looked really good this ep!!! to me visuals are cxk wmt zqb djy and maybe also hyf zpl yeeaaaaaaa but i mean ill say again, i just love ygy’s smile :’) 
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emerald-amidst-gold · 3 years ago
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About me
So, you wish to know about the face behind the muse, do you? Well, I’m not as edgy or ferocious, but I do all right! 
Thank you for the tag @noire-pandora! <3
1: Why did you choose your url?
The url that you see now was actually not my first url. I’m first one was lotus-dreamcatcher something something. (I forget what the numbers were lol). It was just a random thought since one: I love, love, looooove dreamcatchers, and two: I think lotus flowers are such pretty flowers! So, I combined best of both worlds and slapped two or three numbers on the end! XD
The reason I switched it was because I wanted to have a more personal connection with my blog. When I started writing my fic, I was like, ‘Let’s just go the whole nine yards! No one else has it!’ and voila! Will I change it if my hyperfixation vanishes? No. I’m stuck in hell, remember? *smiles*
2: Any side blogs? if you have them, name them and why you have them.
I have no side blogs because I would be terrible trying to micromanage them. My obsessions tend to ebb and flow, and this blog is the first time I’ve latched onto something for so long. I’ve had fixations with Dragon Age before (I’ve had the game for years, of course), but it always fizzled out and I latched onto something else (Fire Emblem, Skyrim, etc.). So, whatever fandom takes me by the horns, ya’ll have to witness it here! *cackles*
3: How long have you been on tumblr?
Hmm..I think for about...2 years? I made this blog a while back, posted a fic I had written for the first time, and then disappeared. I didn’t come back until just under a year ago when I wrote my first version of Emerald Eyes Amidst Golden Vows. But truthfully, I’m not sure. I know I haven’t been here long, though! XD
4: Do you have a queue tag?
Nope! I just scan the tags I like, home page, and those I follow’s dashboard and reblog/like what I find interesting, funny, or what pertains to what I’m currently fixated on. I might go ham and post a lot, or I just slap one or two things on while I’m on break at work. It’s casual for me. :D
5: Why did you start your blog in the first place?
I was curious, to put it simply. I’ve always been into art/writing, and all the art I used to see elsewhere always looped back to here. I actually spent a lot of my time, once upon a time, on DeviantArt (The days when I had a tablet and had the time to draw~). Once I got into writing, however, I decided this might be a better place to share that. Not to mention, I saw the community for Dragon Age and I was like, ‘I want to be a part of this! I don’t have many people I can talk about Dragon Age with or simp mutually about characters! And they all seem so nice! Let’s try!’ And here I am. It’s paid off. All the waiting, slight dejectedness, and quiet posts have PAID OFF. 
So, if you’re a starting blog and you feel kind of put off, just keep at it. It’ll gain traction. Trust me. :3
6: Why did you choose your icon/pfp?
Why not? It’s my BOY in his original, first play through form! (the play through I accidentally deleted, but you know *is still made about that*) 
I chose it mainly because it was my best screenshot of Fane, and I was like, “I am true Dragon Age blog now. :3″, but really, it’s just because it was pretty. I’m a simplistic creature with simplistic tastes. 
7: Why did you choose your header?
Again, it’s my BOY, and well, it was also pretty with the colors and his eyes and everything. I love my dragon son. What else can I say? *shrugs*
8: What’s your post with the most notes?
The post that issued by entrance in Solavellan Hell. 
THIS ONE
It continuously spiraled for WEEKS until it finally went dormant, and I was like, ‘Well, damn. That was a wild ride.’ We all fall prey to the wolf at some point. Even I, who was so sure I adored Cullen. ‘Twas not to be. I like elves. Sorry, Commander. XD
9: How many mutuals do you have?
26! Which is about a quarter of who follows me, actually. Huh!
10: How many followers do you have?
You know, I just checked it the other day and my eyes went wide because I broke a 100 and I was like, ‘Am I really that relatable or likable!? Awwww! *cries*’ I’m currently at 107, but in all honesty, I don’t pay attention to the numbers. Some may be inactive, too, but it’s nice to see people enjoy and relate!
11: How many people do you follow?
85! I don’t like to clog up my dash too much because it’s easy to miss things I’m actually looking forward to seeing (art, fic updates, etc.) I could filter, obviously, but I is lazy. However, if I see a blog I really think is cool and enjoyable and is right up my alley, then of course I’ll follow! :3 I also try to follow back if someone follows me, but I forget to sometimes. I’m a bit scatterbrained if you haven’t noticed from my writing. XD
12: Have you ever made a shitpost?
I think I made like...two? They got a good bit of notes, but mainly because they were relatable more than funny, I think. If you want to know one thing about me it’s that if I adore a specific character, I either RAG on them until the cows come home, or I cry about them hysterically. With Solas, I am both, so I throw swings at him while in the next minute running over and saying I’m sorry. And I vocalize that with random memes. XD
13: How often do you use tumblr each day?
I get on in the morning after I wake up a bit to check around, stay on until I have to go to work at like 2, and I’ll pop on a few times throughout the day during my breaks or lunch, and once more before I call it quits for the day. I have a bad habit of keeping a tab up while I write and hopping back and forth. No wonder my writing flow gets lost in transit. XD 
I also tend to fall asleep with my computer on, soooo yeah. X’D
14: Did you ever have a fight/argument with another blog once? who won?
Nope. I’m twenty-five. I left the drama bullshit back in high school when I graduated. I’m here to enjoy things that mean something to me, interact with people who share those interests, and just witness how creative everyone is and learn from them. Will I debate with someone civilly? Of course, I love debating concepts and interpretations of characters as much as I love analyzing those ideas. However, the moment those debates turn into ‘I’m right. You’re wrong.’ arguments, I walk away and ignore. I’ve been a part of internet discourse before when I ran a RP chat, I don’t need that again. Feel free to chat with me, but the minute it becomes a belligerent free for all, either expect a quick block or utter silence. 
15: How do you feel about “you need to reblog this” posts?
I try to reblog things from content creators because that’s how they get the exposure they need, and I wholeheartedly support those people because I want people to be able to pursue and live a life where they can do what they enjoy and make ends meet rather than be stuck at a 9-5 job where they’re talents are wasted and miserable because of berating circumstances. 
However, if someone explicitly says, ‘you need to reblog this because of some obscure reason’, I won’t do that. Be humble. That’s all. I understand the need for validation, painfully so, but there’s a line that needs to be drawn on some posts like that.
16: Do you like tag games?
You bet your ass I do! I love how interesting they are and that people are eager to involve me in them! Like this one! :D
17: Do you like ask games?
*looks at all the asks I’ve done for Fane* I adore them. Let me talk about my son until the end of time, even if I repeat things because he’s still GROWING.
18.Do you have a crush on a mutual?
Not romantically, but do I think everyone is worthy of love and hugs and yelling, complimenting words that make your insides all fuzzy and warm? YES. LET ME YELL AT YOU AND HUG YOU. <3
Tagging (if you want to of course!): @little-lightning-lavellan @oxygenforthewicked @aymayzing @dreadfutures @whataboutbugs and anyone else who’d like to! 
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randomaddendum · 5 years ago
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Music
I love music, like I'm sure many others do. I can't say I'm into any specific genre of music in particular, I'm quite universal in that sense, I think.
Neither can I say that I'm really into any particular musicians, like hardcore following that sort of thing, I mean as much as I like listening to let's say Nirvana for instance (just because I was listening to "The Man Who Sold the World" this morning), ask me how many albums they have, or some other fan trivia & I'll probably disappoint you. But I do enjoy a number of their songs & if asked if I consider myself a fan of their music, I would say yeah.
As much as I love music, I've never really had or kept an ever evolving playlist of music, constantly updated, categorized & so on. Mine is just one general folder which came aptly named as favourites & whenever I feel like saving something, I'll just add it there, rarely are there substractions, just a growing list which isn't really that big a list anyway, cause I just save what I know I'll really wanna listen to again, others I'll leave it to memory or fate haha & I'm not really consistent in my actions when it comes to playlist anyway :D
A big influence was my dad, what he listened to or sings (big lover of the mic) Sinatra comes to mind or from his CD collections like Kitaro, White Snake, Scorpions, even a free airlines music CD which featured Chopan, Vivaldi, Bach among others was my first memory of listening to classical music),
From my dad I picked up a lot of the oldies or classics, to appreciate the likes of the Bee Gees, Air Supply, Rod Stewart, Michael Jackson, MLTR, Eric Clapton & many others, from my dad I heard songs like Mac the Knife & Crocodile Rock among others. Even the ones I never heard him sing or play but later learned he was at some point a fan, like Deep Purple, I'd end up on my own initiative to go watch them perform live.
He was & continues to be a big influence to me in terms of music. He whether intentionally or not, molded my taste in music, I mean even till today, I find that the more recent music that he likes, I'm more likely then not, to like 😄😄. Truth is, there's never really been, well I can't recall at least, the last time I felt like skipping or changing the music he's played, at worst, I'm ok with what's on.
I guess, connecting back to what I mentioned earlier, because he just already knew and only played what he liked, never really going thru a whole album of any particular musicians, I just picked it up from him, if I hear something I like, it sticks, I may try to listen to a few of their others songs to see if there's anything else, but rarely ever bothering to go thru a whole song list, unless the majority of their music is really good.
Other then that, music of my generation I guess, those I was exposed to growing up back here or in London, a mix up of music here & there, some Third Eye Blind, SP, Green Day, Blink 182, Matchbox 20 & Rob Thomas by extension, Metallica, Eminem (for sure), Snow (one hit) Chaka Demus & Pliers (another one hit), Fatboy Slim, Christina Aguilera (crush back then, lol), Limp Bizkit, Linkin Park, Robbie Williams, Ronan Keating, Boyz 2 Men, All 4 One among many other & even pop groups like Take That & some others that I'd prefer not to mention even anonymously 😂
Some music I picked up, came by chance, whether by mixing around, a lil exploring, stumbled upon the likes of GNR, Andre Rieu, many classical's, Rolling Stones, The Beetles, Louis Armstrong, Nat King Cole, Johnny Cash & Bob Dylan to name just a few.
But beyond the occasional exposure, you can probably see that I listen to songs that are mostly mainly mainstream, whether it be of recent years or those that are now categorized as oldies.
I could go on & on, on this topic, but not wanting to turn this post into a lengthy book. But I do feel like I'm doing a disservice of sorts to myself, in a way this post will feel lacking, incomplete, it doesn't cover a lot, or much at all, however way I may go about it, as there's so many names, songs, genres, stories & back stories left out, unexplained, but in truth it's impossible to list everything down, to explain, furthermore I'm just going on the fly & my attention span & interest to go on typing on this topic, running low.
Anyway, I've been to watch a few performances over the years, my highlight would be Download Festival at Donington Park, where I got to watch Metallica (seen em twice), Slipknot, LP, HIM, Iggy Pop (Grandfather of Punk) & the Stooges, Soulfly, Korn (twice again) & many more, that was fun, camped out there for 2 days, but Oh yeah, if that's one side of a coin, then I've also been to watch 98 degrees perform live, to impress a girl way back, on a triple date of sorts, so that's another side, haha.
Like I said I'm kinda universal, in a way, well some of the newer generation music I just don't get, so like I said, "kinda" universal.
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