#(XCUSE HIM)
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muckyschmuck · 11 months ago
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does Eli even know what sex is
hmmm, knowledge and lack thereof is truly dependent on the year ...
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hope this helped
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delicatedarknight · 11 months ago
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Tim: so why should we select you?
Guy A: I'm rich and handsome
Dick: Bruce is literally a billionaire. are you saying you are more rich than him?
Jason: and handsome? Don't make me laugh you look worse than our family dog.
Guy A: ex-xcuse me??
Damian: you are excused. Now get out
Tim: and what about you?
Guy b: I can protect him
Damian: protect?? dad??
Dick: [scoffs] It's like saying you can protect Batman.
Guy b: but he ain't Batman though
Jason: bitch he might be
Damian: where did you even find these people Tim?
Jason: seriously? imagine saying u can protect Batman
Dick: nah bruh imagine flexing money and looks on Bruce
Tim: ok guys this is the last candidate for the day
Tim: so what makes you special?
Clark: I can cook for him
Jason:[snorts] What if you can cook for him? How can it help our Bruce?
Clark: I'm sorry I'm not as rich as him but I can cook, clean, and care for him
Dick: have you brought anything to claim your statement.
Clark:[places the pie] I brought this Kansas special apple pie-
Damian:[already on his second slice] ae-ets gsoo ghuuud
Jason, Tim, and Dick fighting for the last piece
Clark: uh..soo
Damian:[clears his throat] You are selected.
Dick: Definitely
Jason: prepare your vows
Tim: btw who recommended you? Because you have a really ordinary background
Clark: oh it was Bruce
[collective HUH from batkids]
Clark: [snickering] It was to get approved by you guys
[collective even louder HA]
Clark: [laughing] That's because we are already dating
[collectively yelling WHAT]
Clark: [changing into Superman] hate to leave like this on our first meet but Metropolis needs me
[collective screaming]
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nihtlicwistler · 2 years ago
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mine just evaporated from cuteness
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Rat Dad of the Year 1988, or something along those lines. Anyway *gives him cute round rat ears instead of funny pointy little dog ears like they did in 2003 for some reason*
Image ID under the readmore
Seguir leyendo
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atyourmerci · 6 months ago
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I hope your daddy doesn’t own a gun
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Southern dbf!abby
Cw: smut, MDNI, dom!abby, subfem!reader, age gap (r! Is 20, abby is in her 30s), masturbation, phone sex if you squint and turn your head, lil sprinkle of degradation, fingering, voyerism, no y/n, no pdor
A/N: I hate this<3
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They all saw you as a child, still just daddy’s little girl in your pigtails and bloomers. Even at twenty, after ditching the pigtails and swapping the bloomers with mini skirts that let your ass peak out, didn’t deter their perception of innocence.
Your father was a wealthy man, charismatic and giving that drew the people around him in. Most of his friends watched you grow from childhood, through the ugly duckling phase, all the boyfriends, and growth of your now womanly figure. Not that they noticed. Not that you cared- other than her, Abigail, your father’s best friend from college. Abigail went on to work at your father’s company after college and frequented your life from birth.
You couldn’t recall when it shifted, when she went from your father’s best friend to a toy dangled in front of your face, so close yet unattainable. Clean cut, dressed in button ups, khakis, the cowboy boots that peaked through the bottom of them. Her hair neatly tied in a braid.
The only time you’d seen it down was when your dad held a backyard rager you snuck out to watch. Most of the party had dissipated late into the night, but you had spotted Abby and one of the receptionists in your pool. You watched as the pretty receptionist lazily dragged the strands out with her fingers as Abigail worked her mouth around her chest.
Thats when the heat in your chest began for her, watching her control. Seeing how she could have anything she wanted. You wanted her to desire you, need you so badly shed take you there, even with the risk of wondering eyes.
-
This night ended as they all did. At the end of the night you’d get sent to your room so they could smoke cigars and speak of vulgarities that you now were more than aware of. For fucks sake you were in college now, getting tossed around by pitiful girls that still couldn’t make you come. Abby would, you knew it.
You’d touch yourself at night to the thought of her for the past couple of years, she’d know how to take care of your needy cunt. You’d think of yourself in the pool that night, how your fingers would dance through her hair. The scent of musky pine still overwhelming your senses even though her skin was bleached of pool water. How her fingers would feel deep inside you, her hand covering your mouth to quiet you.
Your father would kill her.
“Alright hun, why don’t you head to bed,” your father says after a fit of laughter. Everyone continues the comfort, your eyes dart to Abby, who seems to be the only one privy to your father’s prompt.
“Dad don’t you think i’m too old for that now,” you try not to get defensive but it comes out bitchy. He gives you that stern glare, the ‘don’t make me ask you again’ look and you glance back at Abigail who gives you a pitied pout, “be a good girl, listen to your father.”
You huff out, making a scene and storming off. Slamming your bedroom door behind you, infuriated. Pissed at your father for treating you like a child still, pissed at Abigail for backing him up. Pissed that she looked so good tonight, the way she put her hand on your lower back to pass you, whispering a ‘xcuse’ me darlin’. Maybe it was her goal to work you up just to leave you helpless and begging.
Your window has a shot of the backyard, all your father’s friends laughing over cigars and bourbon. Pissed how she called you a good girl, right in front of your father, everyone, knowing the effect it would have on you.
She wanted to tease you, work you up in front of everyone? Then they should all watch what she did, a careless act on both ends.
Throwing yourself on your warm sheets, pulling up your sundress to reveal your bare cunt. Driving your head back into the sheets as your fingers work at the pulsing flesh, so tense from the slow incline Abby had you on all day. Your fingers slid so easily through your folds, pearly white slick coating your harsh fingers.
Your breath panting and eager, so ready to revel in your own pleasure after being ripped from it. You’re already close, feeling your stomach tighten in anticipation as you feel your phone buzz at your side. ‘Abigail Anderson’ illuminates your face, without giving yourself a chance to catch your breath you answer.
“Don’t you dare think of coming,” Abby says sternly. Your face flushes, fuck. You peer your weary eyes at the window next to your body, Abby stands a couple feet away from the men, staring dead at you through the glass.
“Wha-“ you pant out, staring dumbly at the woman that never gave you this extent of her control. Your head drops back down onto your pillow, too embarrassed to admit your shameful actions.
“I didnt tell you to stop, did I sweetheart?” Abby says with smugness in her tone.
“N- no ma’am,” giving into her so easily, running your hand down your body to meet back at your sopping cunt that buzzes at her words. “Good girl… you like that, don’t you?” She says doubling down- so fucking sure of her power over you, your mind, your cunt.
“Yes Abby- yes! please Im so close,” you bite down on your lip for relief, your hole clenches over nothing, fingers eagerly tracing circles around your swollen bud. Any moment you’d break, heels digging into your frilly sheets as your chest soaks with sweat. You hear the line go flat on your phone.
You were too fucked to stop, you were going to let yourself have this. Gripping into the sheets you prepare yourself, legs shaking as your door swings open to Abigail. Your legs wide open for her eyes to feast on, she takes a moment to gawk at the sight before locking the door behind her.
She walks over to the head of your bed, unbuttoning her shirt as she watches you drive lazy motions over your clit. She discards her shirt to the side, revealing her bare chest. Climbing so slowly up to you she places her hand on your sloppy cunt, cupping it as her other hand covers your mouth, “Don’t make a sound and I’ll let you come.”
Wild eyed you nod your head, letting her run her thick fingers down the slit of your cunt to collect your release. The smell of pine thick in the air, the sound of her fingers dragging in and out of you the only peep to be heard.
“you think about this all the time don’t you darlin? Turned into a nasty little girl, didn’t ya.” Abby begins to pick up her pace, fingers sliding in so easily. Your eyes roll back, mind going numb.
“Tight little cunt you got, swallowing my fucking fingers,” you try not to scream out, but her unrelenting pace at your hole was getting to be too much. The feeling of spilling over hitting you once again. Your screams are muffled by her meaty hands, but she can feel your pulse around her.
“You gonna come baby?” Abby coos, looking at you pitied and cruel. You shake what motion you still had left in your head.
“Be quiet so your daddy doesn’t hear what a whore his little girl is,” she laughs at how pathetic you are, all from just her fingers.
like that you’re set off, squirming under her heat as she fucks your pussy through it, watching you opened mouth panting as your head pushes into your plush pillows. Biting into the flesh of her palm cant block off the guttural scream you let out. She pushes down harder at your mouth but only pushes her fingers deeper. Every last drop she was going to get out of you.
Thats when you hear the ring of a jiggle on your locked doorknob.
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rumisgf · 8 months ago
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“ATTITUDE PROBLEM” - bakugou x reader
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summary: a match made in hell heaven: a sassy man w a sassier gf. while you’re trying to be productive you end up getting annoyed with him, with how irritating he can be. but, your attitude is nothing new to him. katsuki definitely knows to- no, enjoys putting you in your place.
warnings: college!au, little to no plot, unprotected sex, degradation, dry humping, overstimulation, bakugou talks a lot, reader is black ofc, slight exhibitionism
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“what’s the attitude for?”
bakugou dragged you to his dorm after you being all pouty the whole day. it’s currently the afternoon and you’re supposed to be studying, but instead he decides to deal with you. you both studying together is never a good idea, simply because you both have a smart ass mouth.
“cause you keep trynna act like i’m stupid or somethin’ and we’re doing the same thing, won’t even let me check my phone without sayin’ shit.” you nearly mumble, purposefully to show you don’t even wanna explain yourself. he rolls his eyes and you smack your lips, making a “mmcht” noise. “‘n there you go.”
he looks at you, ready to open his big mouth. instead, he looks at you for a good few seconds. he examines your little stank face, your eyes looking at him with your fresh set of lashes done, his beanie that you stole from him on your head. your brat attitude at the moment. so fucking adorable… he thinks to himself as his eyes can’t help but catch your plump lips. “maybe if ya actually got somethin’ done i’d be off yer lil ass but ‘xcuse me.”
just as you’re getting ready to retort back, he cuts you off with a kiss before you can even speak. you stare blankly at him, trying to hide how easily flustered he can make you. but he already knows.
“now can we do this shit so we’re not clueless on our next patrol?”
“who is we?”
this earned you him rolling his eyes again, before swiftly lifting you out your chair and into his lap. “fix this lil attitude you got before i fix it for you, lil bro.” he says with a stern, yet not completely serious tone. he’s messing with you right now, but if you don’t stop he’s about to, how do you say, stand on business. “lil bro is crazyyy.” you reply in a fake annoying tone. just like he likes this, you like agitating him because you know exactly where it leads. no matter if you’re still annoyed or not you’re still having fun.
“and what if i don’t fix it, the fuck? you don’t scare me.”
with that you find your lips smashed onto his, his hands fiercely gripped the side of your face while the other is gripping your waist, moving you on his lap closer to him. “watch who you talkin’ to.” he mutters into the kiss. his voice is still calm, but much lower in tone and more serious. you smirk into the kiss, hands disappearing into his hair. you go to unbutton his pants and he grabs your hand. “nah, watch out.” he instead turns his chair and places you on his bed, climbing on top of you shortly after. his lips travel to your neck, and he revels in the soft noises spilling out your mouth. you can feel him biting down on the flesh, sucking dark spots wherever he wants. you can also feel him grow harder on your crotch through the fabric of your leggings. “kats-”
he stops, and looks down at you, so vulnerable for him already. “hmm? what happened?” he makes himself seem so oblivious, even though he knows exactly what’s he’s doing to you. he becomes even more amused when you start to chase him lips and softly grind on his erection, slowly becoming so needy for him. he simply laughs, then begins to pull down your leggings. his fingers brush past your clothed wetness and the smirk on his face grows wider. “that easy? ain’t even touch ya yet and you makin’ a mess through your panties?”
“shut up..” you can’t respond properly. any smart remark has flown out your brain through your ears, he won and he knows it. “just do somethin’ about it.” and he does just that. he pulls your underwear to the side, and his thumb finds your clit. you whine at his touch, feeding his ego. “like that?” you nod frantically and he chuckles, keeping a dreadfully slow pace that has you feening for more. he looks down, seeing your slick being to drip out your sweet cunny, landing on his bedsheets. “damn..” he sounds breathless, admiring what he caused. “so wet f’ me, princess.”
his hands immediately go to unzip his pants, and he throws off his hoodie. you instinctively slide off your underwear, biting your lip as you keep eye contact with the bulge in his boxers. “yeah take that shit off f’ me.” his voice is making you hotter by the minute. you look up at him puppy eyed, and he smiles at you. “what’chu want?” he asks tauntingly, already knowing the answer. “i need you now, please.” you whine, pulling him closer
he follows that command, pulling down his boxers. his dick springs out of them and you swear your mouth actually starts watering. his hands spread your legs wide open, and he begins to push himself into your sopping entrance. “fuuuck..” you moan, feeling every inch of him go in. he wastes no time pumping into you, hand placed on your lower stomach. “you still got an attitude? huh? you wanna be a fuckin’ brat? you- ah shit- you still wanna get smart with me, slut?” he looks down at you, looking at your closed eyes. you shake your head, leaning into the pillow. he can’t help but fall weak to how wet and warm you feel on his dick as he slips in and out of you. “look at me, baby.”
his pace quickens, thrusting harder into you while looking you straight in your eyes. you moan out his name and it sends him flying inside. “yeah… yeahhh take that shit.” his hand moves to your hips, pushing you down further onto his dick. “fuck, b-baby..i- can’t..” you cry, feeling the knot in your stomach form. but, he doesn’t care one bit. you were gonna stand on how you were acting. “take this dick, be a big girl.” he says, voice much deeper the second time as he presses his hand back on your lower stomach. his begins to pant with his thrust as he feels your walls tight around him. your hand tries to hold onto his stomach in at attempt to push him back, but you can’t even get yourself to reach because he’s too much. “uh huh, such a big girl. take it f’ me like a good lil slut.”
your moans grow louder as your orgasm begins to creep up on you. “kats i’m close- fuck!” you throw your head back in pure bliss. “yeah, you gonna cum? huh baby?” he grips one of your asscheeks and squeezes it. “yess…fuck kats i’m gonna cum..” you can barely speak through your moans. “mhm, let everybody in that hallway know who my little slut is.” shivers begin to flow down your spine as you begin to do what he has said and cream all over his dick, practically screaming and crying out his name as he continues to drill into you. this sends him over the edge as he chases his own high, leaning his body onto yours. he buries his face into your neck as he pounds into you, overstimulating your soaking cunt. “shit.. ah shit- fuck baby, i’m close.” strings of curses flow out his mouth into your ear. the combination of your lewd, near pornographic moans and your warm walls fluttering around him is almost too much for him. then, he starts to let out a sharp, low moan that lingers on as his orgasm comes over him. he pulls out, letting go on your stomach and moans becoming more breathy as his seed spills out in heavy loads.
he immediately shifts up off you, grabbing multiple tissues out the box he has on his nightstand. you’re still fucked out, breathing heavy and eyes barely open so all you can do is lay there as he wipes you off. after both of you are cleaned off with your underwear back on he plops over next to you, then pulls you on top of him. you both take a second to catch your breath, then he locks eyes with you. one hand finds your ass, softly massaging the skin while the other cups your cheek. “you’re a real brat, y’know that?” you look back at him for a second, then smile lazily at him “i know.” he smacks his lips and you giggle into his chest, purposefully unconsciously shifting on his lap. “stop playin’ before fuck the shit out of you again.”
spoiler alert, he did. about three more times actually.
© rumisgf
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tojisth3rdwife · 1 month ago
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“Bout time you answered the damn phone..”
You wrinkle your nose at the hint of attitude in Toji’s deep voice, finding it a little cute since you knew that just his personality.
With your phone tucked between your ear and shoulder, you continued working down the mountain of laundry in the basket on your living room floor.
“Uhm, rude?” you snort, tossing a freshly folded towel to join its appropriate pile before picking up another.
“What ever happened to ‘hello’ or ‘hey big booty’ ?”
“I reserve those types of greetings for girlfriends that pick up the first time I call.”
At that you roll your eyes, snatching up another towel.
“Girlfriends? So theres others?” you begin folding it. The faint sound of echoe’d music and a muffled voice requesting assistance in the frangrance department let you know Toji was out and about, more than likely at some convenience store.
The big nasty was probably restocking on condoms and that special brand of lube he used on you a while back. The one that resulted in you needing to change your bed sheets.
Twice.
“See, I could play your game and say there are others just to fuck with you....’xcuse me...” he pauses to say to an older woman he squeezed past in the aisle.
“...but you cant take a damn joke and I plan on getting some tonight.”
You pert your lips at the statement but dont argue. Even in the several months you and Toji became exclusive, it was true that his sense of humor surpassed yours when it came to him and other women. You werent nearly as possessive or jealous as he was (usually), but he knew better than to test it.
“Smart. Im glad you value your life. Talk to me nice.” you respond in the most brattish way, making your boyfriend chuckle dryly on the other end of the phone.
“Shut up. Anyway, what kind of soap do you use again? I vaguely remember what it looks like but theres 5 bottles that match what I see in my brain.”
“Soap? Like to wash my body?” you furrow your brow distractedly, continuing to fold clothes.
“Naw to wash your dog.” he tosses back sarcasticaly. If there was a camera crew in your house, you’d be glancing at them with a deadpanned look of annoyance.
You didnt have a dog.
“Would it be so hard just to answer a question? I swear I dont like you sometimes.” you mutter, flapping out the pair of pants you were about to fold and Toji’s smirk is as audidle as his snickering.
“But you love me all the time. Now stay focused. Soap. The kind you wash your ass with.”
You sigh in exasperation at the simple question. And it was for sure simple ,but as many times as Toji had been in your shower, sometimes with you, he should be able to know which damn soap you used.
Old ass..
“Dr.Bronner’s babe. Unscented..”
“The light blue one. See, I knew I remembered it.”
Toji snatches the largest bottle of pure castile soap from the shelves. His massive hand grasps it effortlessly as he made his way to another aisle, squinting at a display of electric shavers curiously.
“Well alright. Thats all I wanted. Carry on cheating or whatever you doing..”
You let out a loud breath, tossing the pair of pants aside.
“Why are you like this? That’s not funny, you know?”
“What?” Toji strolls leisurely down the shave aisle now, eyeing the array of products.
“You saying shit like that. Accusing me of cheating every time I don’t pick up or text back fast. Its irritating..” you huff, aggressively flapping out another pair of sweats that you immediately knew belonged to Toji.
“Is it?”
“Is it?” You mock him, balling up his oversized joggers scornfully and throwing them on the floor. God he was annoying. If he werent so fine, and tall, and big..
And fit.
And sexy.
And intimidating.
And..
What were we talking about?
A breathy chuckle vibrates against your ear, as well as the echoing *beep* of the cashiers growing louder, both yanking you off your tangent.
“Aww, mama. Don’t be like that. I only say it as a joke. I know you’d never cheat on me ‘cuz my dick’s too big.” Toji remarks all too casually, not even acknowledging the way an old man shoots him a disgustingly surprised look at his crudeness out loud as he walked past him.
You snort in amusement and shake your head.
“True. But don’t be so sure. Theres plenty of trees in the forest.” You remark cheekily, glad that you weren’t in front of him after saying that. Part of you wished you were though. Watching those pretty beady eyes of his shrink with his glare was equal parts scary and arousing. To your surprise, Toji finds your rebuttal funny enough to laugh.
“You must really want me to fold your ass like a futon, huh? Just wait, I’ll be by there later.”
Toji turns to get in line at a check out lane. A little girl standing with her mother behind him stares up at his back with wide eyes, probably never seeing a man of his size and stature. Ya boy was scraping at 6’3 barefoot, so in shoes he was surely around 6’4. Even you would find yourself gaping up at him when he stood in front of you.
“Yeah? What you gon do?
*beep*
Toji shuffles forward, the scarred corner of his mouth lifting into a smirk.
“Fold you like a futon. Duh. You want candy?” He quickly changes the subject distractedly, falling victim to the mini wall of chocolate bars and gum.
The threat makes your core flutter while his subtle way of always keeping you in mind had you biting down on your grin as you continued folding laundry.
“Nooo, Baby. I don’t want candy. Thank you though.” You giggle, rolling your eyes.
“Well dont ask for some of mine ‘cuz I aint sharing..” Toji grumbles, still picking up two candy bars.
“Mmhmm.”
Having folded the final article of clothing and setting it aside, you sink back into the couch cushions with a huff, lifting your hand to untuck your phone and hold it against your ear.
“So wait, thats why you were blowing me up? Over soap?”
“Basically. I wanted you to have your own for when you stay with me. I know you have sensitive skin and shit…” he responds before reciprocating the cashiers greeting as he set his items on the belt.
“Awwww DaddyBear, how considerate of you. I wanna kiss you now, instead of slapping your face”
“Youre too easy to impress woman. Its just soap. You leave shit at my apartment anyway so I figured you’d wanna have something to shower with too.”
“I know but it’s still sweet. Come over now so I kiss on you and touch your butt.”
Toji snorts at your antics, knowing damn well he wasn’t letting your hands go anywhere near his ass.
“Yeah yeah. I gotta swing by Shui’s to pick up some money then Im gonna head your way.”
“Ok. But wait, you still could have just texted me that. Why call and make a fuss?”
“Damn. Maybe I also just like hearing your whiny ass voice y’know?”
You sigh, your giddiness fading immediately.
“Just hurry up and come over, ass.”
“See? Can never take a joke.”
“Bye Toji.”
“See you later Big Booty..”
<call ended>
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sonxofxansel · 1 year ago
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thexdestroyer​:
A roar of surprise ripped from this throat - the piercing stab of pointed fangs sinking deep into the opening he had given the mongrel. He’d take the pain of a fresh bite as punishment for allowing the beast an opening to take advantage of, a hollow grin of confidence still lingering on the Original’s face, until a throbbing pain spread out from the bite - like ink seeping into virgin yarn, spreading and leeching its way outwards through his flesh … but how? He regularly fed on vampires that had venom in their system, used it to dose himself into a tolerance to ensure it wouldn’t hamper him in the midst of a fight. So how could a wolf’s venom hit him this hard, and this fast? It wasn’t possible.
But the blurring edges the trees took on told a different tale. The boy’s bite was more potent than the wolf venom he’d spent so long dosing himself with.
Mikael pulled back, relinquishing his grip on tunde’s blade as he pushed away from the wolf, away from the teeth that had tore ragged gashes into the side of his neck. He clamped a hand over the wound - anger and frustration waging for dominance as he glared at the wolf who struggled to his hands and knees in the dirt - he had survived that night, that was how he was still here now. Was that why he venom already burned through his veins? Had their bite been dulled through the centuries?
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Mikael blinked, his vision blurring and when it came right again, the wolf before him shifted out of focus, replaced by the dog that had sired him, “Bastard.” He spat, a forced blink in a pathetic attempt to jar his vision back into focus, “Bastard!” Mikael roared in frustration, his foot landing heavy against the cary’s ribs before he turned away - as much as his rage dictated for him to stay, to play the odds and roll the dice - he wouldn’t take that risk. He’d find him again, when the venom was out of his system - find that dog’s son, find the pack he protected today and tear them apart.
as soon as he felt the weight lift off the hilt of the blade, cary’s right hand shot to it’s handle, yanking it free of his skin before it burrowed deeper. laying on his back, blinking up at the too-bright sky, he panted for breath, every inch of his body stiff and tense, like the after-effects of an electric shock. mikael had gotten papa tunde’s blade from niklaus?
rolling over with a groan, the wolf grabbed the dark object, wary not to let the vampire reclaim ownership of it. he’d gotten it from mikael before he could bury it fully into his shoulder, but fuck that, cary was in no rush to give its effects another go.
struggling to his hands and knees, he swiped a hand across his mouth, wiping away the remnants of blood from his lips ... last thing he wanted was the acrid taste of the prick’s blood lingering on his tongue. his ears were still ringing from the chorus of screams the blade had held, masking mikael’s swearing and approach until a boot buried itself in the side of cary’s ribs, sending the wolf careening into the trunk of an oak that was probably as hold as them both - solid and unyielding, cary kept his grip on papa tunde’s blade tight even as he felt two of his ribs give way to the solid oak tree.
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getting his feet beneath him as soon as he hit the ground at the foot of the oak, the alpha kept his back to the towering tree, but mikael was gone. gone without a trace ... and cary found himself sag with relief; he was alive, but only because of his bite. mikael wouldn’t be that careless a second time. leaning a hand to the rough bark of the tree, he tucked papa tunde’s blade into his belt and braced his free hand across his aching ribs. he’d heal, but he’d pay for letting his temper lead the way with this one.
@sonxofxansel started following you:
“You.”
Had he not killed that boy centuries ago? Had he not been one of those blasted mongrels who had tried to fend him off that night? Of all those dogs, how had he missed him - that bastard’s son. Why was here in this city, of all cities?
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“How are you still alive?”
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hvtchlvr · 1 month ago
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'xcuse me um... i love you !
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a / n - all i listen to is this on loop. i havent written in long plz dont crucify me buttttt i think this is my first cm fic so sorry if this is ass. i wrote it at midnight
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⸺ ⠀A . H x GN!READER︐⠀ ⤾⠀⠀✧
⠀⠀ ࣪ ✧⠀summary - fall is coming around and no matter how many sweaters you own you're always cold. but hotch is warm :) ⠀⠀ ࣪ ✧ word count - around 550 ⠀⠀ ࣪ ✧ content warnings - easily cold reader , bau reader , early established relationship , warm hotch , they are just cute. that's all ⠀⠀ ࣪ ✧ prompt - character A is shocked by how cold B's hands get in fall (by @imagining-in-the-margins !!)
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Fall was always a favorited season. The leaves in different shades, the pretty walks, halloween, just the feeling of it all. The weather? Not so much.
Getting easily cold is a struggle. Random shivers, icy hands, paler skin. You always felt weird when you were younger, how you always had to be a little warmer than everyone. Now, it's something that you've grown into, keeping gloves or a sweatshirt on standby in your bag, warm drinks and food mostly digested in fall.
Yet, today was bad. You were on case North Dakota and even though it wasn't even that cold, you felt so much colder than everyone else. Your sweatshirt wasn't helping and you were pretty sure you could use ice blocks that were warmer than your fingers. It was so embarassing.
Talking to the team while shivering, the concerned looks and giving the 'i'm just cold' while it's not even freezing. You had just finished going over the evidence with the local department and interviewing witnesses with Aaron, who had caught on already.
You've barely been dating for 2 months, and forgot to mention how cold you get during autumn and winter. He was a little more than concerned, eyeing you while you both went back to the department. It was a small town, so you both decided to walk. Mostly you, autumn walks were your favorite.
"You look like you're freezing. It's barely mid-October." He spoke first, reaching for your pinky. Nobody was around, so it wouldn't hurt.
You hummed, "I just get cold easily." You replied as you intertwine pinkies, before fully holding hands. Somehow, everything about Aaron was perfect. It always felt like you were dreaming with him. Not only that, his hands were always so warm. You always had cold hands, all year around, he knew that already, but they get colder in the fall. Aaron was basically just.. warmth. Pure warmth.
No matter his cold and professional acts infront of the team or the police departments, he melted so easily when you two were alone. His eyebrows raised at the change in your hand temperature, he was aware of your hands being a little colder than his, but this was another level. "This is a little more than cold."
You chuckled, sighing. "I always get like this during fall and winter. I may have forgotten to mention it." Aaron smiled back at you, "You should've mentioned this to me. I wasn't prepared for you to be this cold when we haven't even hit Halloween yet."
"I've always been like this, you don't have to plan anything out for later if I get like this. I've got it." You squeezed his hand. "What? No. This isn't the most normal, and why wouldn't I help you? We're dating."
You knew it was true. It was more enjoyable being independent, but with Aaron? It felt different. You've never met someone so dedicated into taking care of you. Even infront of the team, while it was always a little more subtle or professional, he always cares. That's why you fell inlove.
"Fine." You sighed, as much as you tried showing disinterest in the idea, you couldn't hold back a smile. Aaron smiled right back, "I still think you should get that checked out."
"I love you too, Aaron."
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peachesofteal · 1 year ago
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What happens when this guy is mean to darling? Shutting her down? It could be something small.
Darling is getting excited bc she’s talking about some work trip she won and she gets to take her family, and she’s so excited to take the baby away and get some fresh air on a beach somewhere (Simon over hears and packs that away for later. Johnny doesn’t because he’s too busy eyeing this man down) just for dude to interrupt darling, “you can’t travel with an infant. You have to stay home, you’re a parent now. That’s your life” or some shit. Maybe even an “ah you’re a little loud right now, let’s take the volume down.”
Or maybe.. maybe it’s a jealous remark. “Taking your baby daddies too? Or wait..which one is the dad?” Dudes been noticing the tension and maybe he doesn’t handle it well.
either way.
You sink back into yourself a little.
It’s Johnny who cracks. Simon can’t get his hands on him fast enough before Johnny is shoving at this guy.
“Mind repeating that? You’re not gonna talk to her like that.”
Fight ensues. You send dude home because this is a family matter now.
And honestly? Simon has always been a pillar of strength and control. But Johnnys ability to act on emotion and instinct is what makes him such a good man. The man you fell in love with. He’s been struggling and hurt and missing you and how can you stay mad at him? Simon is a planner and has the patience but Johnny is more hot headed.
“When are you going to realize, we’re not going anywhere, darling, I am not going anywhere. You deserve to be treated like gold. And that guy? He ain’t it. He ain’t it because he ain’t me. Ain’t us.”
So darling and Johnny have it out. This confrontation has been needed for a while. Simon just watches, waiting to see if he has to step in. But oh Johnny.
He’d rip out his heart and lay it at your feet if you asked him. He hates this feeling. Hates not being with you and Simon together the way it should be.
His break down is what gets darling to crack a little bit. How can one deny the honesty in such a brazen display of emotion?
So a chance is offered. This little work vacation. Maybe… they can try and see how they’d function as a family. Together. Morning routines and night routines with baby. How they navigate it. If it doesn’t work? Then nope. But if it does?
Maybe their paradise could last forever then huh?
(My southern accent is coming out while writing this, xcuse me)
God yes. I love this. I could indulge in this scenario all day long.
Takes place after one of my favorite asks in the au'verse, here. (bartender anon come back to me)
18+ / disco baby au / mature themes
"Wait, you're taking Bee with you to this conference?" Your boyfriend blinks incredulously, like you hadn't already told him the same information, three times already. Twice last week. Once this week.
"Yes, I told you... the other day, remember?"
"No." He scoffs. "How are you going to manage a baby at a work conference?"
"It's a floor expo, so it's not like I'll be in lectures or anything. Bee will just come along in her carrier, and I'll get to show her the beach for the first time. I know it's going to be a lot but I've been preparing, getting her more used to the carrier and stuff. We’re really excited!" You were over the moon about it. You hadn't been to a beach in so long, and to be able to take your daughter for the first time had you brimming with excitement. You couldn't wait to put her feet in the ocean, let her feel sand. Provide her with all new experiences, watch her learn them and grow.
"And your boss is just okay with you taking your baby, on a work trip?" His voice pitches louder, and you inwardly wince when the conversation that's carrying on in the room slams to a stop.
"Well, yeah."
"You asked her?"
"Kind of, I mentioned that I was going to bring Bee along, and-"
He cuts you off with your name, sharp, and too loud, before sighing.
"You can be so stupid sometimes. You just... never think things through. All emotion and no logic. You really think you can handle that? A baby at a convention? You cry over getting stuck at red lights." The words sting, but they don't surprise you, and you’re about to snap back at him when there's a noise over your shoulder, the sound of your baby, followed by the grind of a deep Manchester accent.
"What's going on in here?" Fuck.
Simon's holding Bee, big hand supporting her back but she's sitting up, face tucked against his chest, thumb in her mouth. She's watching you, tired, waiting for the hand-off from dad to mum, and as it happens, Simon speaks again.
"Darling, take Bee onto the porch." He instructs, and no matter what you do, you can never fight your body and brain's instant willingness to do as he asks.
"Simon, I-"
"Please." He nods, big hand warm on his daughter's back, before it slides down to linger across your forearm. The touch is fleeting, barely there, but it feels like so much more.
You want to say no, want to tell him he doesn't need to get involved, that you're okay, when-
Johnny steps around the blockade that is Simon's body, and launches himself at your boyfriend.
Your shock stopgaps your throat, and then you screech.
"Johnny, stop!" Bee immediately starts crying, a high pitched scream that breaks down into tears. Adrenaline flushes your body, and you stare at him wordlessly. Johnny, who's been cold and distant. Johnny, who's been weird around you. Johnny, who struggles to even make eye contact with you sometimes now, is jumping your boyfriend. In your own house.
"Ye just call her stupid?" His fingers tighten around the shirt collar that’s clutched in his grasp, and your boyfriend sputters.
"Get off me, you fuckin' psycho!"
"I'll show ye psycho, ye piece of shite."
"Take Bee outside, right now." Simon commands, and you spin on your heel, slipping out the sliding door and onto the porch, bouncing your baby as you rock her, soothing her back to her sleepy self.
You ease Bee's bedroom door closed as quietly as you can, clinching it shut without stirring her, your only success in an evening that's gone horribly, awfully wrong.
Your phone buzzes in your back pocket, and you have no doubt it's your boyfriend again, seething with rage at being thrown out of your house after you insisted he leave so you could... address certain things.
Why did he say that? What caused that? What made him so upset with you? And what the fuck happened with Johnny?
Simon is sitting on your living room couch, thighs splayed wide, wider than necessary, if you're being honest, while Johnny paces with his arms crossed.
He's also seething mad, boiling with rage, with emotion, and you're not looking forward to any of the conversations you're going to have to now.
Life could have been a lot easier if you had fallen for only one guy, instead of two.
"Look-"
"No."
"Johnny, take a breath." Simon murmurs, and he does, letting it out in a long sigh before turning to face you fully.
"I am sorry, for the way I acted earlier. Ye didn't deserve that, Bee shouldn't have seen it."
"Well, she's a baby so let's hope she doesn't remember." you deadpan, and he frowns before continuing.
"But, I am not sorry for clocking that fuckin' bawbag, and I'd do it again for ye, do it as many times as I had to until ye realize the truth of things."
"Johnny-"
"I know I've been distant. I've been struggling, standoffish. I've been upset, I felt hurt that ye had our baby and never even called us, darling. Never even tried." Rage simmers in your blood.
"You fucking left me!" You snap, and he holds his hands up.
"We did. And I realize now, that my anger was misplaced. That I-"
"You gave me the cold shoulder, Johnny. You wouldn't even hold Bee at first."
"I know, I know. I was lost. And I should've realized earlier, how bloody stupid I was. How much of a fool I was bein'. I love ye, darling. I'm so, so sorry." He stares at you, eyes wide, and you look between him and Simon helplessly.
Simon just shrugs.
"You already know how I feel, 've told you a million times. You're it for me, for us. You and our baby. You're the only family we'll ever need, ever want. You know why we left, why we made the decisions we did. We can't go back and change it, but we can try to move forward."
"And-" Johnny jumps in, but his voice cracks, and you realize he's crying, hands mashed together as they shake. "I know ye don't want to let us in too much, because it's frightening. That we hurt you, that it doesn't matter why we did what we left. But we love you, darling. I love ye, so much. Just give us a chance, please."
"Let us come with you, on the trip." You laugh at Simon, immediately, but he looks at you with full seriousness. "You said it yourself, it will be a lot. Let us come, help with Bee. Spend some time together, see if it could work."
Could you? Would you?
No. They left you, remember? They dumped you. Why-
Your heart flutters and you can't help it, the wash of longing that swamps you. Johnny stares at you so earnestly, his emotions so raw, and it nags at you, reminds you of everything you had. Everything you lost.
What if you did try?
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thedevilrisen · 3 months ago
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Mr. 73
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Matt Rempe x rangers!daughter Word Count: 1.3k
Description: When left alone in a big rink with nothing but a desire for the ice, but no supervision she turns to an almost stranger to assist her and in return camaraderie and bonds are shared.
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The translucent ice groaned under the sharp creases Matt made with his blades, edges gripping as his stick cradled the puck. Predicting and intercepting its every move, he sent it soaring at the net, sighing in satisfaction as the puck collided into the netting with a thwack.
Spinning around, taking off with a start towards the other end of the ice, careening around the net, Matt smiled gently as he heard the childish joy expressed in a gentle giggle, muffled by a tiny hand swaddled by fleeced gloves. Looking around for the source of the sound Matt couldn’t spot the child it belonged too.
It was common for players’ kids to hang around the rink, especially if they shared their fathers’ love for hockey or figure skating. However there were strict times that the kids were allowed on the ice and it was almost always accompanied by a parent.
With no sign of a parent nearby, and expecting one to appear any minute with their little skater in tow, Matt shrugged and returned to his drills. Skating from on end of the rink to the other, puck caressed and tenderly manipulated to portray his skill.
Matt however was greatly surprised when he saw two fluorescent pink gloves feel along the top of the boards and a mop of brown hair peek over.
“‘xcuse me, Mister 73?” a young girl spoke, she would barely reach Matt’s hip off skates, let alone on them. Yet there she was, wide brown eyes with blown out pupils, reflecting the ice making her look like the sweetest little thing. “My daddy can’t help me practice today, he said I should find someone else instead.”
A smile graced the tall man’s lips and he subconsciously leaned down and rested his head on his stick, “Did he now? It’s a shame he can’t help you!”
“It is!” she spoke, little voice speaking with the conviction only a young child would, unless you were Matt in this situation then he matched her energy perfectly. “I- I was wondering if you could help me practice?”
“Yeah, sure honey!” Matt murmured, skating over and propping his stick on on the inside of the bench, and pulling open the heavy metal door to the bench, swinging it open, being careful not to accidentally hit the young girl. When he stepped onto the bench and his gaze fell upon her pink clad figure, from the little skirt to the hot pink skate covers with little bows on the toes of her boots.
“Dressed for the occasion, huh?” Matt smiled, crouching down, half on the bench and his other half on the ice, “What are we going to work on?”
She toddled closer to him, reaching down to pull her pink skate guards off of her blades and tuck them neatly in the pocket next to the door, before beaming up at him. “My backwards crossovers! In a circle!”
Matt took a second to contemplate what she was talking about, anyone walking by could very obviously see the gears turning in his head as he tried to vividly picture what the young girl meant. “Can you show me?”
If he thought the young girl’s smile couldn’t get any bigger, he was wrong. With a shining smile, brighter than her dazzling little leotard she moved past him and took to the ice. Little legs gliding along the ice rhythmically, before coming to a stop in the centre. “Like this, Mister 73!” she called as she turned and started her little backwards half pumps.
Matt watched as the young girl gracefully moved around in a circle and once she had done two laps she brought her foot up and crossed over, albeit with a fair wobble. Subconsciously the man winced each time she did it, he could very clearly see how the situation could end in her beautifully almost permanently adorned smile cracking and tears filling the crevices.
He flicked his hair out of his face and counted her sixth lap, he was contemplating telling her to take a break so he could maybe help her with technique when she tried her third crossover and her feet got caught and she went tumbling to the ice. Matt scrambled up and towards her, skating the majority of the way on his knees.
“Are you alright, honey?” he whispered, leaning down, delicately taking her small hand and helping her raise into a sitting position. It was only the two of them in the rink so their voices carried decibels louder than they were spoken.
“I’m okay, Mister 73.” she spoke through glistening eyes, lip wobbling slightly, “I hurt my buttbone though, because I left my pad at home.”
“Your buttbone?” He couldn’t help but smile, the young girls terminology for her tailbone absolutely adorable. He looked around for a padding alternative, spotting his gloves and a roll of hockey tape nearby as idea flooded his mind. “I think I can make you a pad, how does that sound.”
Joy filled her juvenile features as she watched Matt get up and skate to his discarded gloves, she rose from the ice and followed him as he grabbed the tape too, he crouched down behind her and grabbed the gloves, positioning them almost like a cushion on her backside and taping all the way around. Revelling in her gentle giggles as she lifted her arms and watched him do it.
“Give that a try!” he smiled, standing up but not to his full height as he was preparing to catch the little girl if he needed. She fell back gently onto the ice, and laughed wholeheartedly.
“It worked Mister 73!” She giggled, the little bounce making her laugh.
“Yeah it did! Matt smiled, “C’mon, let’s master these backwards crossovers!” He smiled, taking her little hand, lifting her to her feet and trying to copy her moves as she skated backwards in a circle. Matt fell sometimes after she fell, becoming slowly more infatuated with her antics every breath he took.
After several more rounds, with each attempt becoming steadier than the last, the girl finally managed to execute her crossovers smoothly, gliding with newfound confidence. She spun around to face Matt, her eyes glowing with pride. “Did you see that, Mister 73? I did it!”
Matt’s heart swelled at the sight of her joy. He knelt down beside her, grinning as he gave her a celebratory fist bump. “You sure did, honey! That was perfect. You’ve got it down now.”
The girl giggled, puffing out her chest proudly. “Maybe one day I’ll be as good as you!”
Matt chuckled, ruffling her hair gently. “Maybe one day you’ll be even better.”
The distant clatter of footsteps echoed from the tunnel, signaling the end of their impromptu practice. As the girl’s father appeared at the edge of the rink, a look of surprise mixed with gratitude crossed his face upon seeing his daughter’s progress.
“There you are, kiddo! I see you found yourself a pretty great coach.”
The girl beamed, rushing over to her dad and hugging his leg. “Mister 73 helped me with my crossovers, Daddy! And he made me a buttbone pad so I wouldn’t hurt myself!”
The man laughed, exchanging a nod of thanks with Matt, who couldn’t help but smile back. “She’s got a lot of potential,” Matt said, tapping his skate against the ice. “You’ve got a future star here.”
As the father and daughter left the rink, the girl waved enthusiastically over her shoulder. “Bye, Mister 73! Thanks for helping me!”
Matt watched them go, a lingering smile on his face. He took a moment to savor the warmth that spread through his chest—a warmth different from the adrenaline that usually fueled his time on the ice. With a last glance at the door where the little girl had exited, he turned back towards the center of the rink.
Practice hadn’t gone as planned, but as Matt resumed his drills, he found himself smiling more than usual. Sometimes, the joy in the game wasn’t in perfecting a move, but in sharing it with someone just discovering the magic of the ice. It reminded him of why he fell in love with hockey in the first place—the pure, unfiltered joy that came with every glide, every challenge, and every unexpected connection.
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candywife333 · 8 months ago
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One of the guys
pairing: OT7? alphas X chubby wingwoman HYBE counselor Y/N (omega in hiding)
NEW MINISERIES (almost resembles a series of just drabbles)
Summary: She's the man. No literally. She totally is. At least in the perception of everyone at HYBE. She hangs out with the guys like a pro , strategizes with them to get them any girl of their choice, gets rid of their one night stands with ease, convinces their FWBs to leave them alone, provides constructive criticism about their sexual techniques, and even counsels them when they are having mental breakdowns. In essence, she makes MEN out of boys. Is that her job description? Not exactly. But she does it anyway. Because Y/N just happens to be one of the guys.
Warning: cursing, crude language, eventual smut
PART 2
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"Y/N!!!! Y/N?!!!! PLEASE OPEN THE DOOR. I NEED YOU!! I AM GOING TO BLOODY DIE OTHERWISE!! PLEASE GIRL, OPEN THE DOOR AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY FIRST BORN CHILD". y/n scoffed as she heard the ruckus outside of her door, first born child? What was she the antichrist, or a demon? The closest to that she ever got was using cow placenta face masks on a Sunday and babysitting her niece.
She opened the door in bewilderment adjusting her thick specs, goddamnit, the constant disguise got on her nerves some days. She stared up blankly at a perspiring, anxious looking Namjoon who was frothing at the mouth. "Sure Namjoon, come in and while you are it, why don't you tell me why you want to sacrifice a squealing, diaper pooping little human being to me? Maybe we can work that into a schedule".
He sat on the comfy couch on her office, as she blew out her lavender aromatherapy candle, turning off her zen bamboo lights. He blurted without preamble in a nervous frenzy, " I am not able to take my penis out of my foreskin ".
Y/N was the only one he would ever come to with such a concern, because she wouldn't laugh in his face and judge him. Y/N tapped her floral pen on her stationary sheet and wooden pad. Her tapping brought his attention to nails painstakingly painted pale pink color with a pink diamond ring surrounded by a halo of smaller diamonds on her left hand that twinkled in the dim light. That was new. He never had noticed those on her before.
She calmingly inquired, "Are you on any medication Namjoon? Any antidepressants or heart medication, or did you ingest any herb recently"? Namjoon stuttered, somewhat soothed by her expressionless, blank face, "No. Not that I know of". She continued asking him, "Were you getting your morning erections and any nocturnal ones prior to this? And also, do you have diabetes or atherosclerosis"? As he answered negatively to all these questions, Y/N sighed. Then she quietly asked, "Do your regularly clean down there, with soap and warm water"?
Namjoon froze. "Ex--x-xcuse me"? Y/N sighed again, she rephrased , "To your own knowledge, do you clean up every time you have a shower down there by retracting back your foreksin from your penis and washing it with at least some warm water". He remained silent til he gasped out ," Yes ....I think I do ". Y/N put down her clipboard , keeping her hands on her thighs, looking directly in his eyes.
"You have a few options Namjoon. Either you can go to the clinic a few blocks away, and get it checked out by the urologist, who I can notify regarding your complaints. And he will get it figured out. Or, I will have to examine the situation since I am a licensed psychiatrist (a doctor nevertheless)".
Namjoon sat there in confusion, Y/N was a licensed psychiatrist, an actual doctor? Since when? So, her counseling idols was the usual for her? Then it all made sense. So that is why nobody had to actually go outside of HYBE to get basic medication/psychiatric medication prescriptions. That is why the prescriptions would always be written in her loopy cursive handwriting.
Then he realized he had to answer her. He decided to let her examine, as embarrassing and humiliating as it was. He didn't have time with the upcoming showcase the day after tomorrow to run to an urologist. "Please examine me y/N".
She nodded in assent and told him to get on the examination table which had been lined with a long white sheet. She turned on a circular examination light told him, "Take your pants and underwear off, and lie down flat on your back. I will examine you, so let me know if I am hurting you. I will stop or be more careful if that is the case".
She turned around , her back briefly facing him so that she could get sanitize her hands before placing gloves on. Namjoon noticed a protruding mass wrapping around her long baggy shirt. Did she by chance, have a big ass? It was a little silly to think that way, but they had never seen her in anything else. And her specs occluded her face, so they couldn't tell what she looked like without them.
Y/N took off her tinted glasses, and low and behold, Namjoon was starstruck as he saw her beautiful face. She had the biggest eyes and a classic round face, with beautiful lips the color of carnations. He was so distracted at her gorgeousness, he didn't realize she was trying to retract his penis from his foreskin. He erupted loudly, "OWWWWW. PLEASE STOP". She held his member more gently as she sighed, stating in a placid manner, " You have to clean down here a little more frequently Namjoon. After sexual intercourse, when in the shower regularly, and especially after a workout. This is called smegma, this white stuff. And it is basically dead skin cells that don't get cleaned off and build up as gunk. Let me get some saline solution and a pair of artery forceps and I will try slowly retracting it".
Namjoon blushed in embarrassment. Y/N took some saline solution on a gauze pad and gently started working it around his penis , making him slightly wince due to the sensitivity. Y/N internally sighed. Thankfully she didn't need to use artery forceps to pull it down. After dislodging the smegma, she was able to pull his skin off of the penis. It took some more time than usual, because there was a good amount of buildup and the man had a big D. Surprise, Surprise.
After fixing the situation, Y/N motioned for him to dress up once again. Namjoon, looking less stressed, but still flushed from the somewhat humiliating experience thanked Y/N, " I am so sorry to waste your time Y/N". Y/N waved away his concern, "That's what I am here for man. Just make sure to regularly clean that area with warm water okay"? Sheepishly smiling in agreement, Namjoon, taking a seat gingerly at the edge of the sofa.
Nodding reassuringly at him, Y/N concluded, "If that will be all, then I will talk to you later. Please let me know if you have any concerns later on, and I can help you out".
Namjoon walked out breathing a sigh of relief, that his problem was easily resolved even though he was mortified that she had to see something so intimate. He shouldn't be so inquisitive, but how was it that her face was so pretty but she covered it in thick framed glasses? And the rest of her appearance was drab and uninspiring expect for her pink accented nails and earrings. Surprisingly ,he had even gotten the faintest most alluring whiff of strawberries and cream that he couldn't place. Not her usual scent. Something alphas like him catalogued frequently, scent patterns. He had a feeling she was hiding a whole personality this entire time right under their noses.
If she was hiding her appearance and her scent, what else could she be hiding?
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taldigi · 7 days ago
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thinkin bout dat.. "ng+ but a girl" dynamic shifts a lot.. the souyo fight... (If you wanna be equals, you gotta fuckin punch me first.) Early Yosuke going ooh girl who likes me? :3 (but I'd wanna give him the benefit of the doubt narratively and have him revert to a more canon souyo vibe after Saki dies maybe?) Dojima stopping Yosuke from goin to her room?? "xcuse u young lady?? not staying alone in your room with a boy?" I need a... You're not my real dad moment please.
YUI AND NANAKO BONDING IS THE BEST I need Nanako to brush and braid her hair for her because she sucks at it PLEASE.
would Yui stop cooking or lean into it more? Yui joins home ec... pleas... Yui and Kanji's relationship would be really different too. Yui and Kanji bonding
im going 2 explode
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sspextkr · 8 months ago
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Sejanus teasing Coryo about how small he is by engulfing his tiny waist in his big hands. Send tweet.
THAT'S THE DREAAAM
he'll just pick him up randomly. like if coryo is in his way he'll grab his waist and move him to the side with a "mmm 'xcuse me sir" and it's the cutest thing ever.
or just randomly hugging him from behind because his arms can wrap all the way around him. he'll kiss his cheek and go "you're so tiny". coryo acts like he hates it but he secretly loves it
or like when they're fucking and coryo is riding him/on top sej will hold his waist and guide him around because he loves holding his waist so so much, holding him so tightly he leaves bruises and marks behind HHH
sejanus plinth is a waist man.
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byrdstrolls · 5 months ago
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Mysteries Are Like Onions Part One
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Somewhere, deep in the western plains, dotted with sparse farms and gas stations, cottonwood and tumbleweed, a young boy steps off a train. He is dressed like a respectable six sweep old in his sunday best, though it was friday. He wears a brown overall dress with a short light red button up. A pair of dark red fingerless gloves and bows in his hair signify his blood color. On his back is one of those tall camping backpacks, nearly the size of the entire kid, yet it had to be lightweight enough, because he navigated the dusty old station with balance and ease, though perhaps a bit of slowness. Clasped in his hands is a yellow lined notepad, the kind where the papers tear off, that he has a pen leaned into at the ready. In his mouth is a tiny gold sunflower necklace he gnaws on absentmindedly, thinking. Anyone who knew him would know it rarely left that place in his mouth. 
Strangely, he is alone. 
Down the way, an older tealblood woman in a long dress and cardigan paces up and down the station's platform. Anxiety radiates off of her even from ten or so feet away, but the child, with a glance around, quickly deduces she is the only other troll at the station. He walks over, red shoes clacking on the grain of the old wood, and, as gently as he can, attempts to interrupt her nervous march. 
“‘xcuse me miss,” He says. “You have a moment?”
“Hmm?” She answers, blinking. “Oh-” She says, glancing at the teenager as if seeing him for the first time. 
“Sure” She says, her gaze softening. 
“You wouldn’t happen to have a map of this area, wouldya? I’m tryin’ to make my way to the umm. Express train station but I might’ve gone the wrong way.” 
The woman pats her pockets, finding them empty. 
“Well- not with me” She says, apologetically. “But it’s not far to my hive. Do you have somebody waitin’ on you?” She continues, hoping the answer is yes. It’s dangerous to travel alone, especially with a caste that low and especially for a troll that young. 
“No m’am” He says, and her heart sinks ever so slightly. “Lead the way.” 
And so the two of them began to walk back towards the direction of the town. 
“I’m Laryan” She offers. 
“Nice to meet ya Miss Laryan” Says the teenager, as polite as ever. 
“What’s your name?” She asks. “What’re you doin’ out here?”
“Barely” He answers, electing to only respond to one of the questions. “I’m Barely Shyeck.” 
“That's… an interesting name” She responds. 
“I’m a detective” He says, as if this somehow justifies something.
“Is that so?” She replies. 
“All detectives” he says, “Have silly names” 
“Can’t say I’ve met enough detectives to know.” 
“Sher-lock. Pie-rot. The silly name” He says. “Came free with my notepad.” 
She snorts, unable to help from laughing at this assertion, and judging by the grin around his necklace on Barely’s face, he had intended it that way. 
“This is me,” She says, pointing to a cozy little one story hive, and unlocking the door. 
“Nice place” Barely says, looking around. 
“Oh- don’t pay attention to anything, it’s so dirty” She sighs, shuffling through piles of papers on a crowded dining room table. Eventually, she pulls out a rail map, sweeping out a place on the table and unfolding it out. Barely inches closer, looking over her shoulder. 
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“You and I are right here” She says, circling the town of Baskertop. “Over by the Fleetrail, (but that’s not a passenger train) and the Eastbound. You can take the Eastbound train” she says, hand going further down the map, “Up to Shercattle, and take that up to Creekturn, and the Express to the city is right there” 
He nods along, his brow furrowing, tracing the journey she’s laid out for him several times with a finger. 
“Could I have this?” he asks. “I’ll work to pay you back.” 
“How so?” She asks. 
“I’m a detective” He again asserts, clearly having a lot of pride in referring to himself as such. “Give me a mystery and I’ll solve it- and I’ll not ask for a fee if you let me stay the day and have the map.” 
She had already become endeared to the strange little young man to the point she might have offered him those things freely. But the little rust seems to take himself so seriously it was hard not to play along. 
“Alright,” She says. “I misplaced my wallet this evening- If you can find it, you’ve got yourself a deal.” 
Barely pauses for a second. “Miss Laryan,” he says. “I’d gladly do that for you, but you’re sellin’ me a lil short” he huffs. “I really can handle a mystery more mysterious than that.” 
“If I can think of another one,” She says. “I’ll let you know. Would you like a cup of tea?”
“Yes miss, thank you” He says, giving one last look at his map before setting down his notepad. 
“Why were you at the train station, Miss Laryan? Were you waitin’ on someone?” 
She laughs, in the floaty, self deprecatory way some trolls do, putting a kettle on the stove. 
“Not exactly. I was tryin’ to build up the nerve to make a visit to Shercattle myself. But it doesn’t matter- misplaced my wallet. I couldn’t find my train ticket, I’m sure it was in it.” 
“Why were you goin’ there?” He asks. 
“To visit a friend of a friend- if he could be called that, and ask him a favor.” Laryan sighs, tapping her finger on the counter. 
“My moirail” She says. “Is a cowboy out on the plains. A bunch of his cattle, and the other cowpokes too, have been going missin’. All of them are at their wits ends about the whole thing.” 
“Really?” Barely says, perking up, scribbling down on his notepad. Drawn to these kinds of puzzles like a moth to a flame. It’s like trying to fish salt out of water, to separate a detective from their nosiness. 
“All of them” She frowns, exhaling. “Are out there blaming the other cowpokes, or a thief. Think someone takin’ more than their share.”
“Makes sense,” Barely nods. “But what’s that got to do with Shercattle?” 
“Well,” Laryan shrugs. “I figured if somebody was stealing the moobeasts, they’d probably have to be selling em, or the meat, somewhere, right? And the cowboys know most people in Baskertop. It’s a small town. They’d know if somebody was buyin’ em here. Shercattle, though, it’s a little further out- mostly dairy farms. They’d have just as much of a reason to buy cattle as we do.” 
“So you were gonna go there, and ask your friend of a friend if he’s seen anything?” The rustblood extrapolates, thinking, that perhaps, Miss Laryan was a whole lot smarter than she trusted herself to be. The kettle on the stove goes off, it’s screech like a final ding to the end of his sentence. 
She takes the thing off the stove, going to pour the tea.
“Yes,” She confirms. “This friend- well, you didn't hear this from me-" She qualifies, before beginning something like gossiping. "He's a, well- I don’t want to say a fling- of my moirail- Vekeso- Well, maybe he would be if they stopped pussyfootin’ about. I knew him through Vek. He’s a dairy farmer. I probably forgot my wallet someplace, because, well, I was so nervous, I think there’s been some kind of fallin’ out between the two of them these past months. I don’t know if he’s still fond of me, knowin’ how tied up I am with Vekeso. Sugar?” She asks. 
“Yes please!” Says the teenager, swinging his feet under the table. “Honey, if you have it. Are you sure you don’t want me to solve all that mystery instead?” He offers. 
“Trolls can turn nasty about these kinds of things when there’s money involved” She sighs, setting down his teacup. “I’d rather you stay out of it, for my peace of mind.” She continues, sitting down with him. “Don’t you wanna ask me questions about my wallet?” 
The young man picks up the tea, blowing on it, a tiny huffy little frown on his face, as if he still considered this beneath him. 
“Where’d you last have it?” He concedes, starting with the basics. 
“Well,” She says, pausing to sip her tea. “I usually keep it in my coat pocket. I wear this coat everywhere, you see. I’ve never lost it before.” 
“Is there anyplace you hang up your coat? Did you buy anything this evening or last morning?”
“There’s a rack at work and at my hive” She says, touching her cheek with her finger as she thinks. “I don’t think I bought anythin’- but, oh!” She squeaks suddenly, paling. 
“What is it Miss?” Barely inquires, a look of concern flashing across his face, he turns the necklace in his teeth. 
“I shan’t say.” She frowns, her shoulders sinking. 
The young rust stares for a moment, and then reaches across and takes the woman's hand, giving it a gentle pat. 
“My loyalty is to my client, Miss. That’s you. I won’t tell anybody.” 
She frowns, glancing to the side, but the boy really does seem so earnest. 
“Don’t tell a soul” She says, biting her lip. “But… I’m a clerk at Baskertop’s Municipal office. My eyes aren’t as fast as they used to be. Sometimes- I’ll get a little behind.” Laryan sighs. “On the paperwork. And- it’s not supposed to leave the archives. But, some days, I’ll take something and fold it up and stash it away- so I can work on it before opening next evening, and not fall behind.” She groans. “I can see it now. I was probably foldin’ up something frantically, puttin’ it in the wallet, rushing around to close up on time- and I probably left it right there on my desk” She says, with a guilty, sad little smile. 
He nods. “See?” He says. “Too easy.” 
“I work again later tonight, I can check when I clock in then.” She muses. “Thanks anyways, Mr. Detective.” She says fondly. “Want me to show you to the guest room?” 
“No thank you, Miss Laryan.” he says. “I might wanna go around town for a spell.” Barely says, standing up to rinse his empty mug. 
“I told you,” She frowns. “Don’t go pokin’ around that moobeast thief nonsense.” 
“I won’t” he says, with a smile. “I promise” He says, heading out the door to go start pokin’ around that moobeast thief nonsense. 
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He starts, as any reasonable troll would, a ranches, moseying about for cowpokes down the road. It’s not long before he finds one. Barely’s eyes light up, and he walks over to a tall beanpole of a jade sitting up on a wood fence. 
“‘xcuse me sir,” Barely says. “You wouldn’t happen to know a Vekeso, wouldya?”
“Who’s askin’?” The man mutters, lifting the brim of his hat. 
“I’m Barely Shyeck” He says, offering his hand. “Detective”
“Detectin’ what?” The stranger huffs, staring down at the hand but not taking it. “Am I in trouble?” 
“Oh, no, I’m just tryin’ to find some missing moobeasts, mister…?” 
The jade stares down at the still offered hand for a moment, before finally conceding to take and shake it. He releases it, leaning back. 
“Mister Vekeso to you.” He says. 
Barely grins, glad to have found him so quickly. 
“Mister Vekeso” He says, “Could you show me the fields where the cattle are?” 
“You fine with horses, kid?” Vekeso says. “Dunno what you’ll find that the rest of us haven’t.” 
“I’ve been riding horses since I was four, mister.” Barely says, climbing over the fence to where Vekeso kept his stallion. Suddenly, the Jadeblood pauses. 
“The other cowpokes didn’t send you, did they?” He asks.
“Miss Laryan did, in a way.” He answers. 
“Of course” Vekeso sighs, plopping down on the horse, and offering a kid a hand up. But he does seem to relax upon hearing that his moirail was the source of Barely’s investigation. “She’s always meddlin’ in cowpoke business,” He mutters, but in the fond kind of way in which a troll teases someone they’re close to. 
“She means well, Mister.” He replies, leaning into him as the horse begins to trot in earnest. 
The plains were beautiful this time of night, a great rolling ribbon of greens, pinks and blues that stretched out into a star filled sky. The plants were tall and thriving in the moonlight. It’s quiet, and a little serene, but the detective's eyes are not on the view, but on the ground. 
“You graze your herd here often?” Say’s the boy. 
“What’s it to you?” says the jade, as forthcoming on information as ever. 
“It just doesn’t look very grazed, is all” He answers, gesturing at the lush vegetation. 
Vekeso is quiet for a long moment before he decides to answer this question. 
“We used to go further north.” He says. “But since the Fleetrail went in half a sweep ago, all the construction, there just isn’t enough land anymore. I’d have been outta a job if the Mayor hadn’t rented us the Redgrass Ranch he’s been sittin’ on.” 
“I see,” Barely says. “The cows sure must be happy about it.” 
Vekeso snorts. “Yeah, I bet” He says, a tiny half smile appearing on the jade’s face for a moment, before being swallowed, and disappearing into a look of barely withheld bitterness. Barely waits for him to say more, but he doesn’t. 
“Do you like the new lands?” The child prompts, finally. 
“That’s neither here nor there.” Vekeso murmurs under his breath. 
“Any information, really” Says Barely. “Might help with the case.” 
“This’s got nothin’ to do with the cattle” He says, still prickly. 
“Motives” Barely retorts. “For trolls bein’ upset, might have a lot to do with the cattle.” 
“I thought I wasn’t in trouble.” Vekeso replies. 
“You’re not.” The teenager reassures. 
“Well, I’m the only one who’s upset,” Vekeso complains. “And I didn’t steal any damn cattle about it. I’m too grown for that. The mayor was nice and all to rent us these grounds.” He huffs. “But he’s still fleet, so there’s all sorts of stupid regulations on it. How long you can stay, who you sell cattle too, who you gotta answer to. The other cowpokes don’t care, because we’re making more money than we ever have, sellin’ out to factories who want that free range sticker ta put on their packages” Vekeso says, pulling the horses reins, bringing the two of them to a halt, in a little area on the edge of the woods that overlooked the herd. 
“Me I’m not fond of anybody lookin’ over my shoulder.” He exhales, sliding off the horse, and crossing his arms. 
“And there’s the disappearances” Barely adds. 
“Yeah, and there's those.” The cowboy sighs. “Not fond’a those either. But I wouldn’t be stealin’ my own damn moobeasts.” He adds. 
Barely hops off after him, stumbling a little as he lands on the ground. “I understand, Mister Vekeso, really. I don’t think it's you. But that helps, anyway.” He attempts to reassure him, again. The child smooths out his dress, and begins to take a closer look around the property. Turning in circles once or twice with his notepad, biting into that necklace. 
“Mister Vekeso” He says, suddenly. “Do these woods go down the whole property?”
“Pretty much” He answers. “They follow along the river.” 
A contemplative expression rests on the rustbloods face, and he turns and begins walking into the trees. 
“Hello?” Vekeso says, watching with mild confusion, gesturing at the herd. “The cattle are over here, “detective”?” he says, gesturing at the field.
“Don’t airquote me, “cowboy”” Barely bites back. “What kinda animals do you usually get out here, Mister?” 
“Nothin’ bigger than a fox or deer, kid. I mean, nothin’ that’s gonna wanna eat a moobeast.” He says. “What’re you on about?” 
“How far north does the Fleetrail go?” Barely asks, bustling around the forest floor as if looking for something. 
“What?” Says Vekeso with a sigh, before finally following Barely into the woods, not wanting to lose sight of him. 
“You said the new segment was built earlier this sweep” The detective clarifies, wandering around glances under bushes. “Does it go back far?” 
“It’s a train,” Vekeso says, struggling to keep up with the child. “Of course it goes back far.” 
“They probably developed,” Barely says, climbing around some rocks. “A lot more land than just your old ranges, didn’t they?” He continues, his voice muffled by distance. 
“Probably” Vek says, frowning. 
“Well, what kinds of animals live further up north?” Barely says, continuing his strange search. “Their habitats woulda been destroyed. I reckon they’d be upset, and starving, and wandering around further out than they’d ever been havin’ nowhere to go.” 
“I see where you’re goin’ with this” Vekeso says, finally catching up. “But what’d be big enough to take a whole cow?” 
“In my travels” Barely says. “I’ve seen howlbeasts, nearly as big as elk, up north.” 
The cowboy stares, dumbfounded. “They’d be a long way from home” He answers. 
“Couldn’t hurt to look, could it?” Says the rust. 
Vekeso walks over to him. “What’re we lookin’ for?” 
“Tracks, scat, big hole or cave in the earth that might be a lay or den.” The child says. Vekeso stares for a moment, before exhaling, rolling up his sleeves and going to help the detective with his search. 
The two of them cover a lot of ground, in about an hour. With every step he takes further into the property Vekeso starts to feel a little bit more anxious about the whole thing. He wasn’t sure if he wanted the kid to be right. It’d make him feel mighty silly, if he and the other rangers had all been pointin’ fingers everywhere about a problem caused by some displaced wild animals. Just when he opens his mouth to tell the kid maybe they better give up and head back, Barely calls from across the way. 
“I found one, Mister!” He exclaims. 
“A what…?” Says Vekeso, heading over trepidatiously. 
“An old den!” The kid says, peeking out of a large hole in between to big pieces of rocks, holding a tuft of hair triumphantly. 
Vekeso walks over, and takes the coarse chunk of fur from his hands. 
“I’ll be damned.” He huffs. 
“It was wolves.” Barely asserts. 
“Well” Vekeso frowns. “I guess I’ll be removin’ yer air quotes, Detective Barely.” He says. 
The child beams. “Thank you Mister Vekeso.” He says. “Couldya take me back to town?” 
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It was hard to ride the satisfaction of having solved the case for long. Vekeso didn’t even seem too happy about it, and all the lengthy way back to town, Barely was haunted by the feeling it had been too easy. As easy as a misplaced wallet, wrapped up in a single day. Maybe he shouldn’t wish a harder life on himself, but he longed to stretch his legs and mind further than this. He couldn’t help but think there was a shadow of an even bigger mystery enclosed around this place. He couldn’t see its form, couldn’t determine its nature just yet. Too many loose questions and pathways, ends that hadn’t quite been tied. 
Vekeso ran off, presumably to talk to the other cowpokes, to talk strategy. That’s something Barely didn’t like, either. He had given him an answer, but not a solution. The land taken by the Fleetrail wasn’t coming back anytime soon. They might just have to kill the wolves, which was it’s own headache, for both moral and logistical reasons. 
At least, Barely resolved, he could head down to the municipal office, and hopefully share with Miss Laryan the joy of finding her misplaced wallet. 
But it was not so. As Barely approached the office, a tiny frown curved around his necklace as he began to notice the place was swarming with officers. He glanced between them, attempting to determine the intricacies of their rank, before walking over to the youngest, who was putting crime scene tape over the doors. 
“‘xcuse me sir” He says, “What happened here?” 
“There was a robbery.” The man sighs. “Someone broke in last day.”
“I don’t mean to be trouble officer, but what’d they take?” 
“Government papers. A couple old county estate exchange receipts. Stop nosing around.” The officer says, more sternly. 
“I can’t help it, Sir,” Barely answers. “I’m a detective.” 
The man pauses for a moment, and then flat out laughs at him. 
“Go play somewhere else” He says. 
“Can I look inside?” Barely pleads. 
“Of course not” The officer huffs. 
“Can you describe it to me?” He asks. 
“Will that make you leave?” The man says. “It’s a fucking mess, kid. They tore the damn place apart, real desperate for that crusty old paperwork. Piss off.”
Barely’s brows furrow, and he finally takes the hint, walking away. He tries to view the scene from different angles, as best as he could from a distance. He wanders back and forth, before, with a slight frown, pulling out his notepad to write down that none of the doors or windows seem damaged. Besides, he assumes, the sorry state of the office and archives, it was difficult to tell someone had broken in at all. The robber must have been let in, or had a key. He contemplates this for a long moment. Before spotting Miss Laryan down the way, and speedwalking down the road ask fast as his little legs could carry him. 
“Miss Laryan” he says, “could I pull you aside for a moment?”
“Barely, I have work” She chides, as the child drags her off into a nearby alleyway. “What’s going on down there?” 
“I need you to stay calm, and answer some questions for me” Barely says, with as much assertiveness as he can muster. 
“Who else works at the municipal office? Who has a key?” 
“Why-” She frowns, “the security? I’m the only clerk, you see. It’s why I gotta work so hard” 
Barely’s heart sinks. 
“What was the paper,” he says. “That you snuck into your wallet last night?” 
“Oh, it was so late” She frowns, struggling to remember. “It was… messiahs- I think… maybe some old land sale?” 
“Are you sure you left your wallet on the desk?” He says. 
“I mean- not really” She backtracks. “But it wouldn’t hurt to check, right?” She says, flustered by the child's seriousness. “Why do you ask?” 
“You can’t go to work,” Barely says. 
“What? Why?” Laryan says, biting her nails. 
“There’s been a robbery” The rust frowns. “And if the fleet sheriffs got any kind of head on their shoulders, you’re a prime suspect.” 
Miss Laryan pales. “But- I didn’t! I was- I take paperwork home all the time! There just- weren’t enough hours in the night- what’re they saying? What should I say?” The woman panics, starting to hyperventilate. 
“M’am,- m’am it’s okay, just breathe-” Barely tries to assure her to little avail. 
“I can’t go to jail!” The teal squeaks, and then, suddenly, falls to the ground, as if stressed to the point of honest to g-d fainting.
Barely’s eyes widen, and he stares around helplessly. “Miss,” he pleads, on deaf ears, staring at her collapsed form, frozen. A little time passes, as he struggles to figure out what to do. 
Eventually, a shopkeeper walks by, turning and peaking into the alleyway with concern. Barely makes a half effort to step in front and block the view of the unconscious woman, but he’s too small and too slow for it to do any real good.  
“Ah,” The stranger says, not even seeming to notice this attempt “She having one of those again?” 
“‘Xcuse me?” Barely says, shyly. 
“Don’t worry about it son,” the man says, rolling up his sleeves. “You didn’t do nothin’ wrong. Laryan gets this spells every time she gets nervous. Must be havin’ a hell of a night.” He sighs. “Help me carry her back to the mart, and get a cold towel, she’ll be up in no time” he says, grabbing her by the shoulders. 
“Of course” Barely says, shaken up but glad to be of help, the rust hurries to grab Miss Laryan’s legs, following the man in front of him’s lead into a convenience store, it’s neon sign spelling out the word DUNNERMART. They brought her over to a bench, and set her down. The young man catches his breath, shaking out his arms. 
“What’s your name, kid?” The shopkeep asks. 
“I’m Barely, Mister.” He answers. 
“I’m Dunner” The man grins. “You want a milkshake?” 
Barely pauses, as if, caught up in the excitement of it all, he hadn’t realized he didn’t have much to drink or eat today. 
“I don’t have any money” He says. 
“First one’s on the hive” Dunner says, turning around to make one in the machine. 
“Thank you, Mister” Barely says, gnawing furiously on his necklace, leaning on the balls of his feet. He wasn’t used to such graciousness, especially from a highblood. The man hands him the drink. Barely pauses, wondering if it would be safe to question him. 
“What’s going on down the road?” The detective says, baiting him by feigning ignorance. 
“Someone broke into the government office,” Dunner shrugs. 
“Any idea who?” 
“Beats me- I wasn’t here all yesterday. Didn’t see anybody suspicious. I hear the cowpokes are fightin’ over somethin’ or other.” He shrugs.
The kid glanced downwards. None of this information was new to him. 
“You know anything about a land sale in town?” He asks. 
“Nope,” He answers. “What’s it to you?” 
“Nothin’” Barely says, sipping his milkshake. “Just curious.” 
“Stay safe, kid,” Dunner says. “Shouldn’t be messin’ around about things so serious at your age. Be careful” he continues. “Where you put your trust.” 
Does he imagine it, or do the shopkeeps eye’s flicker over to the unconscious Laryan for a moment?
“Of course, I’ll be careful Mister Dunner” Barely says, a guarded expression crossing him. 
The shopkeep heads to the back of the shop, presumably to go work on something or other, and he’s replaced by a bored looking cashier. Barely continues to sip his drink at a snail's pace frowning. He’s nearly an inch from finishing it before Miss Laryan’s eye’s flicker open. The rust’s gaze goes to the cashier glued to her phone, and then back to his friend. 
“Stay calm, Miss,” he whispers. And she freezes. “I think you’re innocent- those officials shouldn’ta been workin’ you to the bone in the firs’ place.” 
“What should I do?” She mutters back in hushed tones. “I can’t return the papers, I still can’t find em” She chokes. 
“I think you and I should go up to Shercattle, and visit your friend of a friend.” Barely says. 
“Barely,” She pleads. “I told you to not go pokin’ around about the cattle.” 
“Not about that” He retorts. “I just think it might be smart for you to skip town a couple a nights” He says. 
The woman pales. “Okay” She squeaks. 
“Someone else,” He says. “Was lookin’ real hard for those papers, and I don’t think they found em. You don’t tear apart an office like that if the papers are right on the desk peakin outta a wallet.” The rust continues, thinking out loud. 
“You think so?” Miss Laryan whispers. 
“Yes, Miss, I do.” Barely whispers, determined. “I wanna know who wanted em that bad and why.” He asserts, offering a hand to the woman. 
“So how about on that long train ride, you tell me-” He says, pulling the woman to her feet, picking up his notepad. “In as much detail as you can- every single thing that happened from when you closed last morning til you met me at the station this evening” He says, his sunflower necklace making slow circles in his mouth as he and Miss Laryan walked outside, as the detective concedes that just maybe, just maybe, 
youtube
This wallet thing might be a mystery of the scale he was interested in after all. 
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not-someone-who-matters · 2 months ago
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HEARD THE WISDOM SAGA SPOILERS FOR THAT GONNA SYA EVERYTHING I NOTICED XCUSE THE TYPOS ITS 11 AM ILL EDIT TMOORROW
1, light used as a motif for kindness, warmth, mercy... "So I could bring the world some light" "his light went dark" etc etc
2 "where is he? Where is the man who'll have you to wife? Where is he? Where is the man with whom you'll spend you life cuz in my darkest days Penelope's my drive"
Vs
"where is he? Where is the man who'll have you to wife? Where is he? Where is the man with whom you'll spend you life cuz it's been twenty years, and we still have no king."
Both wanting Penelope as a wife but one sees her as something wonderful to think of as motivation and the other sees her as an object and a prize!!!!
3. "When you (....) of a mother gonna choose a new husband" has a similar melody to "keep your head low he's aiming for the torches"
4. Also that OOH! After antinous speaks sounds exactly like my classmates when they start picking on my friends like XD these suitors are so inmature!
5. Wow antinous does not play around. The SA themes already started.
6. "If I fight this monster... Is it you I'll find?" LIKE IF HE FIGHTS ANTINOUS IS HE SOMEHOW GONNA GET CLOSER TO ODYSSEUS?? also fight those monsters, and Odysseus who is a monster- but a different kind of monster, who protects his own.... You can't choose whether or not you are a monster but you can choose the kind of monster you are...
7. Athena comparing the suitors to dogs and Telemachus to a wolf!!! One more noble and dignified than the others!!!
Also Athena. Don't insult Argos by comparing him with the suitors :(
8. "If she doesnt choose a man to adorn her we:lol being blood and tears..."
Odysseus... Hurry
9. Those who remember your light may notice that the "what keeps you up so late at night my friend" sounds similar to "tell me Athena why you came to my aid."
10. HIS LIGHT WENT DARK AS IN. HE TURNED FEOM THE BRIGHT AND HOPEFUL KID HE WA STO SOMEONE A LOT DARKER AND HOPELESS. AAAAAAA
11. "I could sleep at night" vs "what's a title that a goddess could lend if I'll never sleep at night" AAAAAAAAA
12. WHEN HE TRIES TO LEAN HIS HEAD ON HER SHOULDER AND FALLS.... AAAAAAAAAA
13. "Odysseus where did you go" where did his happiness and joy go.... AAAAAAA I'm crying now.
14. Calypsos .O. face!!! Calypso they could never make me hate u.
15. THE WAY CALYPSO MOVES SO MUCHA ND IDK SOMETHING ABOUT HER IS SO CHILDISH which makes sense bc how many years alone.... But she's so movey!! They could never make me hate Calypso fite me. The moment this animatic is out I'm !!! She acts innocent (but isn't) and reminds me a lot of Rapunzel in the movie when she just got out of her tower.
16. "I'll stay inside your heart" "I'll always love you, I'll stay in your heart" AAAAAAAA
17. Stay in my open arms. :). I am. so Normal.
18. ATHENAAAAA
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thegamingcatmom · 23 days ago
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Anon making way through resi8 for miri
I rewatched moreaus section and then watched him get last bebe part from heisenberg ish part?
The whole vision/flashes of the lil rose being found by miri and then the lords surrounding her and knowing she's in jars is so...
idk just...☹️
Ye, lil Rose didn't deserve all that trauma. 😔
Just goes to show that Miranda will stop at nothing to get what she wants. One would think she holds a soft spot for children and esp. babies, but nope. Just hers. Everyone else can get f*cked or just straight up gets cut into pieces if it somehow aids her. That woman knows no boundaries and that's hawt. 🙊
Do you remember what happened after the Lady D bossfight? Like, the very first big (big) boss you encounter? Afterwards, the Duke tells Ethan that the flask he got contains his daughter's head. So, Ethan learns pretty early on just what those flasks are actually.
But the fact that it's the head and no other body part just makes it so much more horrifying (just as Capcom intended probs). I remember during my 1st playthrough I was like "uh...xcuse me? nahhh, yall playing...right? otherwise this game would be over...right???" 💀
Also, I can just see Lady D being all:
"Mother Miranda gave the head to me, the most important part, surely that means something?? UGH, I need a drink! 😤🍷"
ALCI YOU HOPELESS CASE. 😭😭😭
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Thanks for your ask! 💋
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