#(I also have to emphasize I am joking; he has done everything wrong)

[astro-b-o-y-d]

I could think about how many people Bill has hurt, the things he attempted to do to Dipper, the things he succeeded in doing to Ford, and agree without question that he needs to be thrown off a cliff.

But also look at him

That's my baby angel son who has done nothing wrong ever.

[wanderingteacup]

The art for this couple is beautiful and well done and I’m so happy this novel is getting noticed more and more, do not get me wrong. BUT, I just gotta let out some steam.

Look, I KNOW the BL/yaoi/danmei tropes. I know how it seems to be the unshakeable rule that there has to be a “top” and a “bottom” dynamic that never switches, and that the top always has to be more rugged and tall and wide at the shoulders, while the bottom is the pretty twink. It’s the most common dynamic and portrayal, worn as it is (though I am happy to say I’ve seen a couple good deviations from this rising to the top in manhwa and other media in recent years). The reason why I learned to love this novel so much is that it DIDN’T fall into these basic dynamics the same way while also using them in essence, so I guess the art is kinda making my brain fritz, along with a lot of ppl comparing Fu Shen to Wei Wuxian hahah.

In the book, Yan Xiaohan is honestly the bratty, cunning, scheming and utterly devoted vinegar jar beauty of a “wife” left at home when his man goes to get one drink and talk politics with another dude (yes this happens), who also happily tops his more traditionally “manly” and stoic husband on the regular (while not being a strict top at any point). They are both ok with this, as Fu Shen is never portrayed as “weaker” or less “manly” bc of this (like a lot of BL/yaoi etc. have a habit of doing). Yan Xiaohan also happily opens his arms and demands Fu Shen kiss him and push him down bc ya know he just loves his husband and always wants to get it on everywhere with him (this also happens lol), all the while being fine with carrying on their inside joke of him being “wifey”. He gets compared to a flower and a siren, he gets both a Xie Lian moment and a Jin Guangyao moment with being dressed up and passing as woman for his looks as well as described as being almost the spitting image of his mother respectively, all the while not feeling demeaned by any of it. And while we never see Fu Shen actually topping him, the “sex pollen” bit left more than enough hints that just about everything was tried and tested, so Fu Shen’s “manliness” has never been in doubt in my mind lolol. 

So, in my mind, they’ve always been among the strongest switch/vers energy couple I’ve seen in danmei since the beginning, with Fu Shen deserving to have his own masculinity emphasized and not just shoved into an ill-fitting “bottom” mold. They also break some more of the toxic molds of danmei by being “enemies to lovers” but actually being really heartfelt and domestic and passionately in love for half the book, in the open, making no excuses. Their story of course also has strong themes of morality, politics, goverment and rulers, as well as duty and sacrifice, so just a fully rounded package all around. 

So I guess I just found the art a tad misleading when it comes to their couple dynamics at first glance and felt some type of way about it lmao. Idk sorry about this mini rant, I mean ill to no one and nothing, I just wanted to air out some thoughts I’ve had after reading some conversations about them around the internet hahah. Still loved the art and ofc the books, I hope we get to see more and more art of them in the future bc there’s always room for everything! <3

[theluxuriansecret]

Diary Entry 6.18.2024

Dear Diary,

I haven't felt this consistently anxious in a really long time. It is really starting to get to me. I had my phone on DND all day and cried when I got home. I know that the answers lay within me, I just have to dig them out. I hate that I don't take the time to write (or type) as much as I used to, and I need to start getting back to my routine. I swear I say that every week and yet there is something about life that does not help me stick to it. I understand that life throws you curve balls sometimes, but I feel like.. why cant I dodge any of them? Why must I fall off every single time? I am starting to grow frustrated with myself because I feel as though there are too many outside factors starting to effect me. I try to let the emotions flow through me, but then it becomes everything at once and I can't handle it.

To begin, my moms misery is truly starting to rub off on me I feel. On Sunday, it was fathers day, my grandma didn't feel too well so we all went to dinner as 4, it has been a really long time since we did that. For the most part, I think dinner went really well. We were all laughing, making jokes, even my brother was participating. Until my mom brought up the fact that she's the one thats been cleaning out the fridge, they got a little loud about it, but my dad ultimately thanked her for cleaning out the fridge on his day. It was true, my dad was not holding up his end of the chores so naturally it fell onto my mom. I can completely understand her frustrations, but sometimes I wish she could put her misery aside for the rest of her family. That seems like such a selfish thing to wish for, but for a moment it felt like we were normal again, until she made it incredibly clear that we weren't. The food was really good though.

Moving on, but similar topic, my mother and I have really been butting heads. I just feel like some space would be really nice. I wish I had my own space, I wish I could just have the people I wanted over with out a three day notice. I wish that I didn't have to tell her every detail of every part of my plans. I appreciate her being such an incredible parent, I appreciate the fact that she is very attentive in my life and knows my friends names, and what they mean to me etc, but sometimes it just becomes too much. DO NOT get me wrong, I love that both of my parents are alive and I am grateful, but I cannot help but think about how I am trapped in these four wells, shrinking. In this house I feel small and helpless.

One of my friendships I truly feel is on the fence. Yesterday, my 4 friends and I went to dinner and one of them (one that I share a tattoo with) made a face at our other friend (who we also share the tattoo with) because I laughed a little loud. I have a really loud laugh, it's true, and it may have been right in her ear, but not on purpose. But I just felt like making fun of me right in front of me was truly rude, and I feel like this is the same thing I've dealt with in the past. I feel like she likes me, but she also doesn't like me. I think she enjoys my company, but also just doesn't like me. I don't know what that means. She has made sly comments, and faces and other uncomfortable remarks before, but I always decided to let it slide because they were moments where I wanted to just keep the peace and enjoy my night, but right now I do not feel peace, I feel very far from it actually, and I hate that. I've decided I am not going to be as present in her life as I want right now, not a full removal, but a full step back. I've done way too much for that girl or her to treat me as she does, it's just not right.

Lastly - I love my boyfriend, things are gong well on paper, but something feels off. I asked him if we were in good standing and he said yes, he also emphasized how our relationship was good in a situation that happened in his own life. I can't help but wonder why he hasn't told me he loves me without me saying it first in a week. I don't want to assume anything, or put anything negative out there. but I swear it started a week ago. And i know he has been going through things on his own so I try to give not only myself grace, but him as well. I also try to remind myself that no matter happens outside of me, it is not a reflection of me. I have enjoyed the experience thus far, and just like anything else in this life, it is an experience. I am grateful to experience all that I have in the years I have spent on this earth, and I will continue to the years count on.

no tags today, xoxo

[mickstart]

what happens with jev and horner?

Hey I got a couple asks about this and this, understandably, happens every time I bring up what happened with Jev. So I'm gonna try and put everything here for future reference.

For benefit of the other anons, jev drove for the rbr B team (now alpha) with ricciardo in 2012 and 2013. The set up was largely the same except the B team were barely even midfielders most of the time and the car could NOT have qualified as it does now alongside the red bulls.

Placing this under a cut because of discussion of an eating disorder, workplace bullying, and Jules Bianchi's fatal accident. (Also, it's long.)

not directly but as team principal horner was responsible for rbr's toxic team culture in the early 2010s, an atmosphere and culture that made jev's life a fucking misery and contributed to causing his ed and hospitalizing him. You could make the argument this was limited to the B Team... except when Daniel was fitted for his rbr seat only a few months before jev collapsed rbr publicly joked about the size of his hips being too big for the car and "compromising newey's design." RBR was well known for its "lad / party culture" and they played this atmosphere up as red bulls marketing has always been about how Young Hip And Cool they are. RBR have done nothing to solve this environment judging by alpha tauri's treatment of pierre including joking about pierre's food habits on their socials.

If I had sent a driver to the hospital with an ed not even a decade ago, I would simply not joke about my drivers eating habits!

Horner was involved in choosing daniel over him based on how his personality would fit the team / work with Seb, not the results they were getting (jev was doing better than daniel with less experience). Jev has commented a few times (sorry not sure exactly when in the video it is and I haven't watched it in a while) about how the team reacted differently to daniel than to him. They put constant pressure on him to perform and then when he couldn't enjoy the races and was constantly moody and hard on himself they were annoyed at him for the "attitude" they taught him to have.

Jev's firing was as abrupt and cruel as you would expect from rbr. He was essentially told he was too old for the junior team (my brother in christ you are the one not promoting him) and sent to formula e with a vague promise that if he "impressed" them enough he might get to come back. This is especially insulting because then when rbr found themselves down a driver with Seb leaving for Ferrari they then put Kvyat - the driver whose lower height and weight they used to shame jev into starving himself - into the car, and then MAX, a TEENAGER, who proceeded to drive into everything he saw. Horner and Marko decided he didn't fit their brand and that was that.

Making this even crueler, Jev was a very good friend of Jules Bianchi and trying to process his friend's horrible accident at the time rbr fired him. I'm not saying it was wrong to fire him BECAUSE of this, not at all. Just that some tact and awareness of his mental state and subsequently going about this in a kinder way would have gone a long way.

Jev has talked about his depression as a consequence of all this and - like all red bull drivers - being left without funds or managerial support after red bull dropped him like a stone. What they did to him was fucked up. Is Horner to blame for all of it? No. But it's his team. Yes even the Sister Team, he holds power over them. It's his responsibility to keep the team in check, to not allow these things to happen. It's literally his job to make sure he knows what's going on in the team, not to give interviews.

But they KEPT happening. The tp of the b team punching drivers, drivers pitted against each other, jaime QUITTING MOTORSPORT ALTOGETHER because of the culture in place at rbr. The list really is endless. I cannot emphasize enough I am only citing a FEW examples.

RBR have bullied and destroyed the mental health of almost every driver they've come into contact with. If I were christian horner I'd stop throwing stones and start picking up the shards of my glass house.

[pastelwitchling]

I cried myself to sleep last night, so that’s the kind of season we’ve got, people. Beware going in, I skipped every scene that didn’t have Michael, and a few of Maria’s for one reason I’ll list below, in my thoughts on 4x07.

I have nothing to say on Liz and Max since I skipped all of their scenes, along the scenes with Isobel and Dallas. I just don’t care, I really don’t. I just want Alex.

By the way, side note, when you have a “Last time on Roswell New Mexico” that takes forever because it’s diving into a million subplots that don’t need to be there, excluding even more subplots by the way, you have a problem.

We were robbed. That title was just intentionally tricking us, wasn’t it? To call an episode Dig Me Out when you knew the fandom would be demanding Alex to near-protest degrees by now is an intentional attempt to trick us into thinking that Michael at least would know by now, if not having Alex himself in the episode. Instead, who do we get discovering it?

The one fucking person we want as far away from Alex as possible.

And that’s why I didn’t skip her scenes . . . near the end. See, I went into the episode knowing full well that Maria, Liz, and Dallas would end up knowing about Alex being gone at the end, so while I was able to watch a second or two of the rest of Maria’s scenes (before I just couldn’t take anymore the fact that they were actually having Alex reach out to her of all people and ended up skipping since she assumed it was just her mother anyway), I ended up watching the one at the end.

I’ll get to that particular scene more and why it made me cry in a second, though I should think the reason’s obvious. But for now, I just. I’m. I am so sick of watching The Maria Show. It’s bad enough so much of season 3 focused on her, but now we get her involved with Alex’s storyline so that I’m obligated to sit through her scenes, and when I tell you the mere sight of her, after everything she’s done, makes my heart clench in the most painful, miserable way, believe me I’m not exaggerating. This character might just give me cancer, I loathe her that much.

The problem, however, is also the fact that I just want Alex back so bad, and I want someone to finally notice he’s gone, that I will take whatever I get at this point. The promo for next episode shows that Michael finally finds out, and I just hope it’s at the beginning. By the gods, we deserve that much by now.

I understand Tyler had to miss a few more episodes than usual (it’s only been two more episodes that he’s missed than his usual three, but it feels like an eternity, which really emphasizes how much he carries this show on his back and that’s probably why he had back problems), but it’s not hard to show Michael missing him when he’s not there. Show him bored, less in the mood to make jokes, too tired and busy missing Alex to be his usual snarky self, and have other characters notice and acknowledge that.

Quick mention that I did watch Dallas’s scene with Bonnie and Clyde there at the end, and, aside from liking Clyde and Bonnie together and wanting them together, I just love Dallas so much, and he’s so wonderful, and give him and Malex their own spinoff please, the three of them the center of the show the way Sam, Dean, and Cas were the center of Supernatural. Mostly Sam and Dean, but you get the point.

Now. That scene at the end. I know Alex isn’t dead. I know they wouldn’t do that. But just hearing the words, and after not having Michael even openly or privately miss him, and finally having her, of all people, find out he was gone, to then hear Liz ask if Alex was dead, too, it makes me cry now as I write this. The very words terrify me to my core, and I just really, after everything they’ve put us through, did not appreciate it.

This isn’t suspenseful storytelling, this is completely ignoring a most-beloved character when it would only make more sense to acknowledge him when he’s not there, and then throwing in a twist by the character that has wronged him the most, in unspeakable ways, all for the sake of shock value, and so that they could show off how “tolerant” they are by having Maria be the center, even though, instead of ever giving her a proper redemption arc, which they could’ve done this season, they instead try to trick the audience once again into thinking she never did anything wrong and that anyone is lucky to have her attention. I’d rather be branded, thanks.

But again, I’ll take what I can get at this point. My sole hope in terms of Maria’s involvement in Alex’s storyline is that it ends before the next episode does. I hope they just have her there to prove to Michael that Alex is missing and that it’s not because he’s dead (seriously rnm writers, you think it’s clever writing to make your audience cry more because they’re upset at the way the character’s treated than because the story itself earned those tears?), and then make her go away.

Finally, Michael. I get that going home was something he’s wanted since he was a kid, but he’s said several times already in the past four seasons that Alex is his home. Yet the dialogue comes off like he’s not even missing Alex and that he’s really not torn up at all about leaving him. I know that’s not the case, and thanks to Vlamis, we know that Michael isn’t Michael without Alex, but for the love of Poseidon, they need to show us that! I’ve watched the promo a hundred times by now just to rewind Michael finding out about Alex, and I hope that Michael not only finds out in the beginning of the episode and goes feral so that we could have as much of that as we are owed, but that Michael realizes that the idea of Alex being in danger tips the scales all the way so there’s no longer a choice between leaving and staying with Alex.

And you know the most tragic part of all of this? If I had known the pain this show would cause me--not like Merlin, that causes pain because it yanks on all the right heartstrings--but because I would get a hero that I haven’t loved this much since Harry Potter himself (who, by the way, Tyler himself said Alex was the Harry Potter of Roswell New Mexico and that is the best description that will ever be), and see the way he’s been so blatantly disrespected, I would still do this crap all over again, if only to have Alex Manes and malex in my life. For Alex and malex, I hope and plea to the gods that the next six episodes make up for the past five. That’s it, that’s all I’ve got.

[aquamarinescarlet]

Don’t give up just yet

Pairing: Wanda Maximoff x Reader

Word count: ~3.6k

Warnings: two curse word (I think), brief mentions of sex and cheating, angst (bare in mind these warnings don’t apply the way you think they do, you’ll have to read to understand)

Summary: The classic soulmate AU, sentences written on each other’s wrists, but with a twist.

Author’s note: This was basically an excuse for me to reinvent the soulmate AU with the wrist tattoos thing. It’s sorta angsty, but I just thought the ending was too funny. Just experimenting here, tell me what you think.

PSA: Dividers are the count down till the day: black is reader focused, red is wanda focused, gold/yellow is also reader focused, but I thought it deserved a little spark.

“You should call her, y’know.”

“Why would I do that? She made her point very clear.”

“It’s her wedding day, Y/N,” Mia reasoned, “and this fight was months ago, you have to get over it.”

You rolled your eyes at her insistence. This discussion has been happening every day for the past two weeks.

“I didn’t do anything wrong, why am I the one who should get over it?” You emphasized.

“He is her soulmate, and she is your sister, the least you could do is pretend.”

“Ugh,” you let out a guttural scream, “I can’t do this anymore Mia, I stand by what I said. That man is an asshole and this soulmate thing is stupid. I don’t trust him, no matter what the words on both their wrists say, and I’m not gonna watch her go down with this and not do anything about it.”

Mia didn’t respond, she knew she’d reached your last nerve. You watched as the woman left your office, sending a last sympathetic glance your way before walking into the hall. 

Mia was right in some points, and you knew that. She was right about it being your sister’s wedding day and that you should be there to support her. She was wrong about you needing to be the one to apologize though. The way people manipulated their lives to fit this whole twisted Soulmate Theory made your blood boil.

The Soulmate Theory was quite simple: everyone was born with a sentence written on their wrists, popular belief is that those are the first words your soulmate will say to you. It was cute, and it worked most of the time, not for your sister though. Or at least you thought so.

Oli's soulmate was Isaac. They had met three years ago and eventually started dating. Oli was a firm believer of the Soulmate Theory and had never dated anyone before, so it was all new and exciting.

You started noticing the patterns roughly one year after they started dating. He was controlling her, discreetly, barely noticeable, but it was there. 

First with clothes, Oli had made it a habit to always ask for his opinions on her clothing, and he would tell her he hated something, regardless of her telling him over and over again she had liked it. You made little comments here and there about his actions, mostly jokes but with some truth behind, she didn’t notice.

Second was friends, Isaac would always want to meet Oli’s friends, and if she went out with one he didn’t know he would make her feel guilty. You started giving more serious warnings, pointing out what he was doing more clearly, she didn’t care and called you crazy.

Third was her feelings, he had his mind set on what her role should be in his life. He praised Oli endlessly when she cooked or cleaned. Other than that, he didn’t care, didn’t pay attention to her stories, didn’t appreciate her paintings and drawings… 

It got to the point where she wouldn’t want to paint anymore, when she was telling a story it would be without her usual excitement. Her smile no longer reached her eyes, she was constantly tired. 

You confronted her about it, several times, but it was of no use. You’d point out the facts and she’d retort with ‘he is my soulmate, the universe bound us together, he wouldn’t do this to me!’

Three months ago was the last time you two talked. She told you he asked her hand. She knew you would be against it, she tried to ease you into the idea of her being with Isaac for the rest of her life. You weren’t having any of it. 

After hours of screaming, arguing and loads of tears, she told you not to come to the wedding, and you said you wouldn’t. 

It’s now four days from the date and you’re not going as long as he’s the one she’s marrying.

You stared at the words on your own wrist. ‘It’s you’. That sentence haunted you for years. What a stupid set of words for your soulmate to say.

As a kid you adored the Soulmate Theory, you paid meticulous attention to the first words you’d exchange with anyone, you made new friends nearly every day in hopes of hearing those words, but they never came.

Until they came. At first it was exhilarating, but the ones you said didn’t match the ones on the person’s wrist. You were extremely disappointed. And then you heard them again, and again, and again… It became almost routine. Every single person you met would say ‘it’s you’ or some variation of it. 

You being who you are certainly didn’t help. During college you had started a tech company and now it had grown to be one of the biggest and most important in the field. The new inventions did win you several prizes and a lot of money. You were also stupid famous, being the young brilliant CEO and all. 

Ever since, you gave up on looking for your soulmate. It seemed counter productive to get yourself all worked up just for it not to happen every single day. You made your peace with it, although a small part of you just wanted to meet said person.

The situation with Isaac and Oli helped. Seeing that it could end up hurting you made it easier to not fixate on finding your soulmate. Nonetheless, the desire was there; hidden, pushed to the back of your mind, but still there.

You just wished your sister could see it too, that the Soulmate Theory is not the solution to all her problems. 

“Relax Steve, it’s all taken care of.” 

“What about the flowers? Did you book the buffet? Did you check with the band? And the decorations? I saw some people didn’t RSVP yet, should I redo the seating charts?” Steve rambled on as Wanda just laughed.

“The flower problem is solved, the buffet confirmed, so did the band, the wedding planner is working on the decorations and redoing the whole seating chart seems… unnecessary, they still have three days to confirm their presence.” She reassured the man who was more stressed than her about the whole situation.

“Okay, sorry, I just want to make sure everything is perfect.” He huffed, taking a seat on the couch. 

“It’s going to be perfect, don’t worry.” She couldn’t help the weirdness that surged upon uttering those words.

“How are you so calm?” Wanda just shrugged, not really sure how to answer. 

Steve took a deep breath and gazed at the red head, offering her a smile. 

“I’m going to sleep, all this wedding stuff has been stressing me all day.” 

“Okay,” Steve made his way to his bedroom but she called him before he reached the hallway, “thanks for the help Rogers.” 

“No worries.” He shot a last smile before disappearing. 

Wanda found herself alone in the living room, the silence only making her thoughts scream louder.

She would be married in three days. It seemed unbelievable. After losing her parents, being experimented on at Hydra, fighting along Ultron, losing her brother and becoming an Avenger, she never thought she would have time to fall in love.

Yet, here she is. Although the feeling wasn’t quite what she thought it would be. It wasn’t exciting, or nerve racking. She felt no different than any other day of her life. Steve seemed like the one who was getting married, not her. 

Vision is sweet and caring, she feels so happy around him. Then what is causing all these doubts to haunt her?

She knows what it is, she just doesn’t want to admit it.

Those words. Those stupid words painted forever on her wrist. ‘Don’t do this’. Ever since joining the Avengers she started using several bracelets to hide them, but they still burned on her skin every single day.

She’d heard of the Soulmate Theory at a very young age. Her parents had explained how those were the first words she’d hear from the love of her life. She would spend hours daydreaming all sorts of scenarios in which someone would say those words to her and they’d fall in love.

After her parent���s death, that stopped being her priority. At the Hydra base she’d only see her brother and a couple dozen different Hydra soldiers, too old and mean for a soulmate. 

Gaining powers was a game changer. She was older then. Stronger. They finally allowed her and Pietro to leave the base and create chaos in Hydra’s name. “Do good” in Hydra’s name. She believed she was doing the right thing. She truly did. 

Hearing her first ‘Don’t do this’ made her question everything. It came from a little kid nonetheless. A scared little kid. It must’ve been a mistake, she thought at the time. But that mistake happened, again, and again, and again… 

When she joined the Avengers her eyes were opened to all the pain and terror she had caused. All the people she hurt. Then it dawned on her, what if one of those ‘Don’t do this’ came from her soulmate? What if she had hurt them, or worse, killed them?

The idea terrified her. So she hid those words on her wrist. A reminder of the evil she’s done and the love she’ll never have. She promised herself to never look for her soulmate, she already caused them enough pain, they didn’t deserve to get tangled in the mess that was her life.

And then Vision was created. Him and Wanda got along greatly. He made her happy. They fell in love, or at least that’s what Wanda told herself, that she fell in love with him. It was possible, there’s no rule on the Soulmate Theory that says you can only fall in love with your soulmate. Plus, Vision is not human, so he doesn’t have words written on his wrist, he doesn’t have a predestined soulmate, technically he doesn’t even have an actual soul for this sort of thing. They could be each other’s soulmate. A loophole on this stupid theory.

Why didn’t it feel like that though? Why was she questioning it so much? And why now? Three days before her wedding?

She took off the bracelets and stared at the ink, brushing her fingers lightly over it. She loved Vision, she affirmed to herself. She wants to marry him. This is what she wants. And she believes in these words, for a while. Long enough for her to fall asleep, turning off her brain from overthinking the situation too much.

Work has had you occupied all week. With back to back meetings and loads of paperwork to fill out, you’ve barely had time to think of anything else.

But now it seems like everything is done and you have more free time than you’d like. 

You left the office early, not having much to do there anymore, and, instead of spending all afternoon home alone, you decided to go out for some coffee.

You were sitting on your usual table in the small coffee shop close to your place. It was calm, quiet and homely, a nice contrast between the places you frequent. The warm cup on your hands did nothing to distract you though.

The book you’d brought was long forgotten on the table as you glanced at your phone every few seconds. It’s two days till the wedding and, even though you tried not to think about it, you hoped your sister would text you saying she broke it off. It was unlikely, but wishing she could get some sense knocked into her wouldn’t kill.

You were so focused on your thoughts that you didn’t notice a woman glancing at you until you caught her trying to call your attention.

“It’s you!” She said, astonished, pointing to the cover of a magazine showing a picture of you.

Recognizing that issue as being a rather old one, you just nodded and offered the woman a friendly smile. She took that as an opportunity to approach you.

“Hi. Sorry,” she sounded excited and also nervous for bothering you, “I just wanted to say what an inspiration you are to women all around, to me especially. I’ve been opening my own business and seeing what you do has been such an encouragement to me. So, thank you!” 

You were surprised by how nice she was. You’d expected her to ask you to invest in her business or something, like everyone who approaches you does, but she didn’t and it was a nice change of pace for once.

“What kind of business are you opening?” You asked. Listen to her talk would be a good distraction, plus, you could use the company.

“Oh, no, that’s ok,” she said, “I don’t want to bother you any further.”

“Please,” you urged, “I have the rest of my day off and I could use someone to talk to. Unless you’re busy, then I wouldn’t want to be a burden to you.” You laughed to ease the woman’s nerves.

“Sure?” You nodded and gestured to the empty seat across from you. 

She accepted it and you spent at least an hour talking before she had to leave. It was a pleasant conversation, she praised your work but didn’t refrain from giving some interesting criticism on your business. The topic of an investment or a partnership never even came up. 

It got your sister out of your mind for a while, although it didn’t last long.

Laying on your bed, your eyes fought to stay open, your mind swirling with all possible scenarios regarding Oli. She would be miserable if she went through with this, and you couldn’t do anything about it.

You love your sister, you care so much about her, but she refuses to listen to your warnings. You could swallow your pride and go to the wedding. You could try and support her. But that would just make an accomplice to her stupidity and you’re not going to just stand there and pretend that that’s ok.

You thought about texting her, way too many times. But your relationship is already rocky as it is, the least you could do is hope she gets some clarity on her own.

One day till the wedding. She’s 24 hours away from the happiest day of her life. Why is it, then, that Wanda doesn’t feel as happy as she should be. 

She didn’t have to fake a smile, she was happy, but that smile didn’t quite reach her eyes. 

None of the others seemed to notice it. They just thought it was the nervousness of having everything set so the day could run smoothly. Vision even brought up the possibility of her having cold feet about it, but she denied it thoroughly, assuring him she wanted this.

And she does. She wants to get married, have kids and build up a family of her own. She wants it all. 

It still seemed weird though. Like something was off. 

“Steve just called,” Nat interrupted her thoughts, walking back into the room, “everything is set, prepped and organized for tomorrow.”

“Let’s try on the dress then.” Carol urged the girl to put on the piece of clothing for the millionth time.

It did her justice. Slim at the top and flowy at the bottom, accentuating all her curves perfectly. It wasn’t big and puffy but light and delicate. She smiled at her own reflection as the other women crammed around her to take a look.

“You look beautiful.” Pepper said in awe. 

“She does, doesn’t she.” Laura agreed, even though she’s the one that helped her choose it.

Wanda didn’t say anything, just smiling and appreciating her own image, excitement growing on her chest from wearing it in front of everyone the next day.

The girls spent hours planning how they would do her hair and makeup. There were so many ideas, disagreements and arguments that Wanda was completely drained by the end of the day. She was happy though, to see her friends being there for her, eager to help and make sure everything was perfect.

It was nice to have people around since she lost so much throughout the years.

After the women were gone and she found herself alone, Wanda’s thoughts from the beginning of the day came back, hitting her like a train.

Was she really more excited about wearing a dress than about getting married? Was this a sign of her actually getting cold feet? 

She shrugged them away, affirming to herself these are just stupid uncertanties people always get before their wedding day. At least that’s what happens in movies, so nothing to worry about... right?

Thankfully your work slump had subsided as now a gigantic pile of papers sat on your table. Some contracts had to be restructured and a set of stores had to be chosen to distribute your newest technology. 

You thrived in that scenario, with countless reports and 2D drawings of the prototypes scattered about the room. Your mind was going a thousand miles a minute, seemingly unaware of the events that would take place later that day.

That peace, however, was short lived. Your brain short circuited for a second when you checked what had caused your phone to buzz.

Two voicemails. 

From none other than Isaac. 

It was right then that it dawned on you: Oli was marrying that asshole today. In only a couple of hours actually.

Before listening to the messages you started to record your phone screen, maybe he would try to threaten you or something and you could use that to convince Oli to break things off with him. It wouldn’t kill to be precautious.

The first one was sweet, although it almost made you gag, it was sent with good intentions. Isaac was asking you to go easy on Oli, regardless of your feelings towards him, you should be supportive of her and her decisions. Too pretentious for your liking, but sent with good intentions nonetheless.

The second one started awfully weird. Some muffled sounds, things you couldn’t quite make out. Until you heard a loud moan, your eyes going wide as you pushed your phone away from your face. Isn’t it technically ‘bad luck’ to see the bride on the wedding day? You didn’t have time to dwell on those thoughts as the voice on the phone started to moan each other’s names. The woman didn’t sound anything like Oli, because it wasn’t Oli. Isaac was cheating on your sister? And on their wedding day!?

Oh you weren’t about to just let that go. You stopped the recording, thanking your intuition, and quickly ringed Oli.

It rang once… twice… three times… and then voicemail. You tried at least four more times until you figured she just didn’t want to talk to you.

“Marie can you come in here please?” You called your secretary.

A few seconds later she popped her head inside your office.

“How can I help?”

“Can I use your phone!?” You sounded more exasperated than you wished.

“Are you sure it’s a good idea to call your sister today?” Damn, that woman knows you too well. You sighed loudly.

“Please… I just…” You trailed off, sounding desperate this time around.

Thankfully Marie gave in and lent you her phone. You typed Oli’s number and rang it, several times, she didn’t pick up once. You were starting to get truly desperate now.

“Do you have the address?” You handed Marie her phone back.

“Here.” She handed you a piece of paper from her pocket. 

It was on the other side of the city, at least a one hour drive. You quickly grabbed your coat, purse and phone, rushing out of the office, only being stopped by a hand wrapping around your wrist.

“Don’t do anything stupid.” You gave her a reassuring smile and a quick nod before making your way to your car. Marie has been working with you since the beginning, she always knew when you were up to nothing good. She also knew that when you set your mind to something, there was no stopping you.

The drive was excruciating. You kept making stupid mistakes and taking wrong turns. Everything seemed to work against you, being it: accidents, red lights, slow drivers, pedestrians. Even the birds chirping around were pissing you off.

You finally reached the venue and stopped the car messily in the front entrance. You quickly ran up the stairs, and almost tripped and fell when you heard the officiant was already performing the ceremony.

You reached the doors and yanked them open, hopefully interrupting the wedding before it was too late.

“Don’t do this!” You screamed at the top of your lungs, nearly breathless. 

The guests all turned towards you, surprised. So did the couple on the podium.

Except those people weren’t Oli and Isaac. You recognized them, Vision and Scarlet Witch, or at least that’s the names they went for on television. You’ve seen them before, doing business with Stark had its perks, but had never been introduced.

You could’ve felt bad, but your stomach was a turmoil of faith and nausea. You were either really early or really late to stop Oli.

“Sorry,” you said, trying to catch your breath, “wrong wedding, carry on.” You turned around to leave, but not before noticing the bride glancing at her own wrist.

You didn’t get the chance to take a single step out the door before her voice filled the silence that had settled.

“It’s you.” You stopped dead on your tracks. Your wrist burning slightly, not the kind of pain to cause discomfort, just enough to be noticeable.

Those words. 

Her looking at her wrist.

Your’s burning now.

You turned back around, earning all kinds of confused glances from the guests. Your eyes fell on the woman, a smirk plastered on your lips.

“Seems like this isn’t the wrong wedding after all.”

[vdlest]

Our Place To Have Forever

Characters:

Bucky Barnes x Reader

Summary:

You and Bucky are finally moving in together.

Warning:

Fluff

"Come on, stop playing around, Buck!" you yelled at your boyfriend, who you are currently chasing around the empty living room of your newly bought house.

You are chasing him because he has your checklist of the things that should be done and followed as you two move in together. But he insists that you two should just be spontaneous about it and enjoy this milestone in your lives.

"James Buchanan Barnes, I told you, give that to me!" you yelled again as you continue to chase him. You already used your "commanding" tone which you only use during missions.

Bucky knew you're already getting annoyed with him, aside from the fact that you are using your commanding voice, you already mentioned his full name.

He finally stopped running around, but still not letting go of your clipboard checklist.

You stood in front of him, giving him a death-defying glare, "Give it to me," you uttered word by word. But he did not move a bit. He kept the clipboard away from you, "Are you really testing my patience, Mr. Barnes?" you asked him, narrowing your eyes.

Bucky chuckled and quickly kissed your forehead, "You know, you're more beautiful when you're mad," he joked.

"We still have a lot of things to do, Bucky," you remind him, then you extended your hand towards him, "So give that to me."

Bucky knows being organize is your thing. You want everything to be in its right place, right position, and right timing. You want everything to be done and accomplished at the perfect time. Instead of getting annoyed with your perfectionist attitude, he loves that about you.

"Baby, you should stop worrying about your list just for today and be carefree," he told you. He grabbed your hand and slowly asked you to turn like a ballerina, "Let's just enjoy this moment, this brand new start for us," when you turned around, he pull you towards him, pressing your body against each other.

Maybe this is the reason why you and Bucky are staying strong together — you two were complete opposites, but that doesn't change the fact that you two are madly and deeply in love with one another. And that made the two of you decide to finally move in together.

"Oh, baby, can't believe we've gotten this far already," you said and placed both of your hands on his shoulder, you two were almost dancing.

Bucky smiled, "And we still have a long way to go, baby. Forever starts today," he told you. When he realized he just used the word forever, his facial expression changed and he frowned, "Did I just use the F word?"

You giggle and nodded, "You just did and I'd love to hear it more often from this mouth of yours," you looked at his lips.

His hand traveled to your waist and you could feel the way he squeezed your waist, "Uh, what if we keep ourselves busy first with something more important?" he asked you, emphasizing the word "more" as his brows go up and down, "What 'ya say about that?"

You chuckle and shook your head in disbelief.

You lost count of the times you two had made love, but each time you do it, you are still surprised by how good and intense he gets. After all, it's not just about you two being horny bunnies, it's not just about you two satisfying each other, it's not just about lust, it's all about how you two love each other to the extent that you two are willing to give your all to each other.

"Oh, I love you so much, Bucky," you sighed as you stare at his face, reflecting on how much you two have been through just to get to where you two are right now, "Everything happened so fast. It was like only yesterday when we met and this morning I woke up we're loading all our boxes and stuff to move to this new place we're gonna call home. It's like we're really living our happily ever after."

Bucky must've noticed when your smile changed a bit, he must've sensed something is bothering you and your thoughts.

"What's wrong?" he cupped your face as he asks you.

You sighed and shook your head, "I just...I just," you stutter, trying to find the right words to explain what's really bothering you.

"Come on, Y/N. You know that you can always tell me anything, right?" he assured you. Bucky won't stop anyway until you finally tell him what is really bothering you and your thoughts.

You first gave him a small smile, then you finally had the courage to tell him, "I'm just afraid that this happiness we're experiencing right now will have something in return," you shuddered. You cleared your throat first before explaining everything to Bucky, "I mean, I am happy for us. I have never been this happy and content. I just don't want something or someone to ruin these beautiful moments, this, us," you added.

For the past weeks that you and Bucky were planning for this day, for this move-in day to your new home, you could never be so happy, but a little part of you starts to think that something bad might happen in exchange for the happiness that you and Bucky are sharing.

You promised yourself that you're just gonna keep that thought in you, but you and Bucky also promised that you two will never keep a secret from each other, most especially if the other party is involved.

He is involved, so yeah, you told him.

"Baby, nothing and no one can tear us apart. You and I will always be together, and even if we aren't physically together all the time, you are always in my heart and I am inside yours. These are just words but our love is stronger than anything, right?" Bucky asked you.

"Yeah, I know. I just don't want to lose you," you looked down, fighting the urge to cry and avoiding ruining the moment.

He let go of one of your cheeks and held your chin to make you look up to him again, "You'll never lose me. I'll never lose you. And just like what I said, no one can tear us apart. I won't let them," he leaned forward and kissed your forehead, then pull you close as he wrapped his arms around you.

Feeling Bucky's warmth makes you feel at home all the time like no one and nothing can harm you. You guess that's what he'll do for the rest of your lives, he will always cage you around his arms and make your fears all go away.

"We're on the new chapter of our lives," you heard him say while hugging you, and slowly guiding you to sway with him, "And this place, this place will serve as our new home, the place where we'll invite our family and friends over for every special occasion or even just for a simple gathering, the place where we'll always choose to come home to, the place where we'll start to build our own family, the place where we'll raise our kids, the place where we'll grow old together, and the place we'll always have, forever. And yeah, I just used the F word again."

You chuckle as you pull away from his hug to meet his eyes, "You are so adorable, James Buchanan Barnes."

"I love you," he said.

"I love you too."

-v.dl

[afriendlyblackhottie]

Gorgeous

Summary: You’d spent the last year and a half pretending to hate Ransom Drysdale. One Christmas trip could break that facade.

Pairings: Ransom Drysdale x Plus Size!Black!Reader (though it’s pretty inclusive. It’s just what I had in my head when I wrote it)

Warnings: And there was only one bed, enemies to lovers, fluff, smut, swearing, secret crush, daddy kink

Words: 7K

(A/N: Yes. I pretty much wrote a Hallmark movie. Yes it is also based on Gorgeous by Taylor Swift because I’d also hate Ransom Drysdale for making me fall in love with his stupidly handsome face. No I will not be taking questions.)

Tagging: @titty-teetee @queenoftheworldisdead @olyvoyl @liquorlaughslove​ @harrysthiccthighss​ @mariahthelioness29 @donutloverxo @navybrat817​ @stargazingfangirl18​ @hqneyyincc​ @iam-laiya​ @zaddychris​ @emjayewrites​

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Contrary to popular belief, you didn’t hate Ransom. Sure, his smug smile made you want to punch him in the face sometimes. But you kind of liked the vein that popped out on the side of his head when you did something to irritate him. Or the way he rolled his eyes at you when you did something to annoy him. And you annoyed him a lot. It was like you couldn’t help yourself.

To be honest you kind of like those things too much. Not that you’d ever admit it out loud. Imagine everyone finding out that you had some little primary school like crush on this asshole. Down to the point where you’d push him into sand to prove that you didn’t like him in the slightest.

Since your best friend was marrying his best friend, you were spending way too much time with him. You thought you’d done a good job at convincing Monica, your best friend, that you absolutely couldn’t stand him. She seemed to buy it since every eye roll was appropriately placed anytime you thought you might laugh at one of his rude jokes.

So, when your best friend asked you to accompany her and her fiancé to visit his family, you were positive. It might be nice seeing how these super rich people did the holidays. You’d met them a few times and they’d been super nice. Nothing like how Ransom or your own boyfriend’s family came off as stuck up as hell. Also, you were kind of dying to see the decor.

Until that day came. “I’m sorry!” Ava said for the millionth time since she’d told you the news when she’d FaceTimed you. That not only was Ransom coming, you’d have to ride with him in his Beemer because she’d packed more than she’d expected and there’d be no more room in Simon’s car.

You groaned softly, wrinkling up your nose. Your cats rubbing themselves against you because they knew you were leaving and loved to get all needy when you did that. You were already having a hard morning so this was kind of the last thing that you needed. “Maybe I shouldn’t go,” you suggested, even though you were supposed to be leaving in about five minutes.

She pouted. “But I need you there so I won’t be bored.”

“You know David,” your own boyfriend who was not going with you because he had to work and also because you weren’t sure he’d be your boyfriend by the time you came home, “hates Ransom.” It still made for a good excuse, though.

“What he won’t know, won’t kill him?” She shrugged. “Look it won’t even be that bad! It’s just the car ride.”

You raised an eyebrow. “Yeah, for four hours.”

“Just do this for me,” she whined. “Please. I’d do it for you.”

“Fine, but next time my boss has one of those boring dinners at his house, I’m making you go with me.”

She gasped. “Deal!”

There was a honk outside and it was safe to say who it was. You rolled your eyes. “You’re so lucky I love you because I’m already annoyed.” You peeked outside the window to see him aggressively honking.

Fucking asshole.

Once you’d hung up with Ava, you grabbed your bags so you could hurry out of the house. Luckily David was already at work so you didn’t have to explain to him why you were getting in the car with him. Ransom seemed to like getting under his skin, which you’d noticed is what he did to most people. Including you, but it seemed to be for a different reason than most people had.

“Hey,” you greeted him, as you struggled to carry your stuff to the trunk. Even though you were trying to keep this facade up, you didn’t want to be rude.

“Can you hurry? We’re on a strict timeline, Buttercup.”

You hated when he called you that. “First, don’t call me that. Second, maybe I’d finish sooner if you’d help.”

There was this smirk on his lips as he finally opened up his car door so he could take one of the bags out of your hands and then the others. “Did you pack your entire closet?” He asked as he tried to make it all fit in the trunk.

“I have a lot of needs,” you retorted.

“That’s probably why you need that sugar daddy, huh,” he said. This is why David didn’t like him. Okay yeah maybe you’re twenty-six with a forty-seven-year-old boyfriend. Sure, he brought you nice things, but what was wrong with that.

“He’s my boyfriend,” you made a point to emphasize. You weren’t going to tell Ransom Drysdale that you were with your boyfriend because he was your daddy dom. That’d be fucking stupid.

“Look, sugar daddy boyfriend whatever,” he said, dismissing you. “I just think you should pack lighter.”

“Whatever. Aren’t we on a tight schedule or something?” You rolled your eyes before going over to the passenger seat.

“Hey, hey, hey!” He stopped you to open the door himself. “I don’t need you to scratch my shit. You have to handle with care.”

You tried not to laugh which made you bite your bottom lip instead making you taste the mint chapstick you’d just put on. “You’re such a control freak,” you said, having to brush passed him so you could sit.

He didn’t say anything as he closed it gently.

The ride had been pretty boring so far. You yawned a few times. Wiggled in your seat trying to get comfortable. He surprisingly pulled over to get you coffee and even got you your blanket so you could curl up at some point.

If you weren’t trying to hate him, you may have swooned. He also said it’s because he didn’t feel like hearing you complain so maybe less swooning anyway. You reached for the radio and he smacked your hand away. “Ow!” You gasped.

“I’m just fucking with you.” He laughed, glancing over as you glared at him.

“Dick,” you mumbled under your breath as you reached forward again to change the station.

“What was that?” He asked.

“I said you’re a dick,” you repeated, sitting down as a song you liked started playing.

He groaned. “I hate this song.”

“Too bad,” you snickered.

“Need I remind you that this is my car, Buttercup?”

You narrowed your eyes at him because he called you that damn nickname. “Whatever. At least it wasn’t that Dad stuff you listen to.”

“Should you really be the one making fun of Dads?” He laughed.

“Hey! David doesn’t even want kids.”

He raised his eyebrow. “You don’t?” He asked looking genuinely surprised at that.

“I mean... maybe. I don’t know.” You shrugged. “Do you?”

“Well, I hate kids, but maybe for the right women. Who knows?” He once again took a quick glance at you, with this small dorky smile on his face.

That was surprising. You felt yourself starting to get to where your heart was swelling in your chest. “Why are we talking about this, you weirdo.”

He chuckled as you cross your arms in front of your chest as you looked out the window.

For the rest of the car ride only the music filled the silence. You wanted to say something. Thought about at least trying. Every time you started to open your mouth no sound came out.

You’d look at him while he focused on the road. Just because you couldn’t like him didn’t mean you couldn’t look at him, right? Though it was bothering you that there was a hole in his cashmere sweater.

“I’ll open your door,” he said getting out. You waited for him to open your side, but you heard the trunk pop open. You turned around watching him take out your four bags along with his. How the fuck was he so strong.

He opened up your car door finally. “Do you want me to take some?” You asked him with a frown as he closed the door with his elbow.

“It’s okay,” he replied already walking off. You scurried behind him trying to catch up.

Ava and Simon were right behind you. Ave got out and went to hug you. “See I told you it wouldn’t be so bad,” she said. “Wait why is Random holding all your stuff?”

You shrugged. “He insisted.”

“Weird,” she replied.

Simon’s family was pretty nice, but they were so busy doting on the happy couple you were kind of ignored. It was actually kind of nice because when you met David’s family, they pretty much scrutinized everything you did. His mother was honestly the bane of your existence. Like, lady, if your son hadn’t had a kid by now how was that your fault.

That was another thing that made you treat Ransom the way you did. You’d met Linda a few times now and she already hated you. You could only imagine how she was towards his girlfriends. You’d only seen the tip of the iceberg of the insanity of the Thrombeys, though Harlan had been nice every time you’d met him.

“Okay, so, it turns out that one of Simon’s cousins decided to come at last minute and uh,” Ava took a deep breath, “you two have to share a room okay, bye!” She tried to grab Simon’s hand, but you managed to catch her first.

“What,” you said a little too loudly so you lower your voice, “the hell, Ava.”

“You’re shitting me,” Ransom groaned.

“It won’t be so bad just think of it as a sleepover. Maybe he can paint your nails and you two can do face masks together,” she started rambling off.

You weren’t as amused. “Or maybe me and you could share.”

“Hell no! I’ve slept in a bed with you. You’re a cuddler.” She frowned. “Besides I wanna sleep with my boo.”

“You’re the worst best friend ever,” you told her. “Fine, but he’s sleeping on the floor.”

“Like hell I am,” Ransom said.

“I have a boyfriend!” You reminded them. “I can’t sleep in a bed with another guy. Especially Ransom.”

He raised an eyebrow. “We’ve been over this, Buttercup. You don’t have a boyfriend; you have a sugar daddy.”

You huffed. “Alright that’s it I’m calling an Uber.”

“And paying a hundred bucks to get home?” Ava rolled her eyes. “Come on just tough it out.”

“I hope you know that I hate you now,” you told her.

“Good. We’ll work it out in couple’s therapy.”

—————

The first night was awful. It felt like you couldn’t sleep. While Ransom seemed to sleep like a baby on the other side of the wall of pillows, you’d built between the two of you.

Even when you’d tried to move away from him, he’d just hold you in place. At some point you just had to accept your fate. At least you were cozy. So, you just kind of let it happen because who knows if this could again. When you actually woke up, he was already gone. You were neatly tucked under the comforter.

As you were finishing up your face routine and making yourself look presentable, Ransom was coming back in. You’d never seen him with sweats on before because he was usually such a preppy asshole, but he looked good. “Morning.”

“Morning,” you mumbled.

“How’d you sleep?” He asked.

You raised an eyebrow. “Why? You didn’t do something did you?”

“Me? Never?” He smirked before walking passed you and into the bathroom.

You walked through the house, taking in the way everything was beautifully decorated for the holiday. Honestly this place was house porn. “Good morning!” Simon’s mom, Trish, greeted you as you walked into the kitchen.

“Good morning,” you replied with a grin.

“Did you sleep okay?”

You nodded. “Yeah, it was perfect,” you answered.

“Breakfast will be ready soon so why don’t you go wake up Simon and Ava.”

You nodded. “Yeah of course.” God they were too nice. Maybe you need to be around rich people more often.

Oh wait, no. David’s family came from money and they were awful. Also see Ransom.

Simon had come to answer the door, freshly showered. Ava was just coming out of the bathroom. “Morning,” he said.

“Morning. Your mom said breakfast is going to be ready.”

He nodded. “Okay. Babe, you ready?”

“You go ahead,” she told him. “Y/N, c’mere.”

You and Simon exchanged looks and he shrugged. “Guess I’ll get Ransom.”

Ava waited until he was completely out of the room before motioning for you to close the door. “So,” this shit eating grin appeared on her face, “how was it?”

“How was what?”

“Sleeping with Ransom.” She rolled her eyes dramatically. “How was it?”

You shrugged. “We put a pillow wall up.” You really didn’t want to mention the cuddling.

“What? That’s it?” She groaned. “I always thought he’d be a bed hog.”

“I stayed on my side, he stayed on his.”

“That’s boring. I at least thought you’d have something to talk shit about.” She sighed. As far as you knew her and Ransom got along. She just found it super entertaining how you bitched about him.

The two of you went to sit in the dining room, waiting for everyone else. Trish sat down not to long after bringing the two of you mimosas. “Oh my gosh thank you!” Ava said getting up to hug her mother-in-law.

“Of course, Sweetheart.” She grinned. “So, Y/N, how long have you and Ransom been together?” She winked, bringing her champagne flute to her mouth. “I always said that Ransom just needs to find a sweet girl to settle down with. Maybe melt down that cold exterior he puts up. You know he really is a sweet boy.”

It was a good thing you hadn’t even been able to take a sip because you probably would have choked on it. “Her and Ransom aren’t together,” Ava answered before you could.

Her jaw dropped. “Oh, I just thought because you were fine sharing a room.”

You shook your head. “It’s okay.”

Ransom took a seat beside you while Simon sat on the other side of Ava. Trish looked between the two of you because this table was huge and Ransom could have sat anywhere else. He could have sat on the other side of Simon if he’d wanted to.

Breakfast went by pretty uneventfully, though the pancakes the housekeeper made were kind of to die for. “So, what are you kids planning for today?” Simon’s dad, Warren, asked as plates started being cleared away.

“Well, Ava’s never been ice skating,” Simon said.

“That’ll be fun,” Trish said. To be honest you were kind of nervous about ice skating. You’d done it before, but ate shit hard. “Is this your first time, too?” She asked you.

“No,” you replied. “I’m not very good at it, though.”

“I’m sure Ransom can help you,” she said with a grin.

Ransom groaned softly beside you. “Yeah of course.”

  As soon as you got on the ice you could feel yourself going down. Ransom grabbed onto you to hold you up. “Don’t eat shit on me already,” he said with a smirk on his face.

“If I go down, I’m taking you with me,” you snap back at him.

He rolled his eyes. “Let’s just get this over with.”

It was a good thing you’d bought these leggings that were fluffy on the inside and this jacket you were wearing was cozy because it was freezing out here. Ransom had to

At some point you kind of started to think that you had the hang of it. Like maybe you could actually do it. He started to slowly let go of you, but the minute you started to feel unsteady he’d grab your hand. “Thanks.”

“No problem,” he said sighing softy. He stood for a minute holding your hand so he could skate with you to the middle of the rink. “Hey can we talk about something. Really quick?”

You nodded. “Sure.”

“Hey, so,” he looked down at you with this almost nervous look on his face. “There’s been something I wanted to say, but I wasn’t really sure how to before.”

You nodded. “Yeah, what’s up.”

“Um,” he sighed. “Well, okay, so I-“ well he didn’t get to finish as this asshole barreled into you. “Y/N!”

You hit the ice pretty hard almost bouncing up as you came back down. “What the hell!”

Ransom immediately helped you up. “Watch where you’re fucking going!” He yelled back after the guy who’d already started skating away without even saying sorry. “Are you okay?

“My leg like hurts really bad,” you felt yourself tear up because you’re a little baby.

He sighed. “Shit, okay,” he said. “Are you okay to stand?”

“Oh my gosh!” Ava came over to the two of you. “Are you okay? I told Simon to go tell security. That guys been such an asshole this whole time.”

“Yeah thanks,” you said.

“Here why don’t we got some hot chocolate,” Ransom said.

It felt so nice being back in your boots. Ransom had you sit before going to get the drinks. You couldn’t help yourself as you rubbed over the spot on your leg that had been hurting super bad. Wincing at the tenderness.

“How’s your leg?” Ransom asked, sitting beside you with the steaming beverages in hand.

You brought your cup up to your mouth loving the warmth against your cold nose. “It’s fine,” you answered.

He reached down to touch the spot making you jump. He laughed. “Wow usually I have to get a girl naked before they start reacting like that.”

You narrowed your eyes at him, trying to play off as annoyed, but it didn’t work since you couldn’t help yourself as a smile spread on your face. “Oh, shut up.” You blew at the steam before taking a sip. “So, what did you wanna talk to me about?”

“It’s.... it’s nothing,” he said picking at some lint on his coat, suddenly getting all quiet. He took a sip of his own drink.

Here’s where you made a mistake. Which is the mistake that got you into this in the first place. Because every time you looked into his eyes, seeing those long lashes framing those deep blue eyes made you feel like you might drown in them.

And you fucking looked into them. After that first time you told yourself to never do that again. That it’s what made you trick yourself into thinking that you liked him the first time. No. He was just so close.

You pretty much fought yourself on this for the rest of the day. Even during the little shopping trip that the two of you dragged the boys to when you’d been debating with yourself if you wanted to buy this gorgeous coat or this really dress. Not that you needed more of either.

“Here just get both,” Ransom grumbled, taking out his card.

“What!” You gasped. “No, I can’t ask you to do that!”

He shook his head. “It’s okay. Just wear it for the Christmas party.”

“But I already have a dress,” you said.

“Look, I’m sure your sugar daddy buys you very nice things at Forever 21, but I insist.”

You rolled your eyes as he quickly handed the worker his card. “Hey!”

“Too late,” he replied with a shrug that smug smile on his face.

You looked down at the glass as your things were being wrapped up nice and neat. The gold necklace had a diamond moon pendent. It looked so delicate and would have gone so good with that dress.

“You like it?” He asked, noticing.

“Yeah, it’s beautiful,” you said. “But this is already too much.”

“C‘mon, we have to get back for dinner,” Ava said as Ransom grabbed the shopping bags.

—————

At some point every night the pillows would end up on the floor and you’d end up nestled into the crook of his neck. He’d have his arms around you until you’d roll over onto your side where he’d wrap himself around you again. Then you’d wake up to him gone because he went on his runs at the ass crack of dawn. You noticed how you’d be snuggly tucked into bed each time.

A part of you wanted to feel bad. That you were away and cuddling with another man every night. It was hard to feel guilty when you weren’t sure if your boyfriend was taking advantage of you being gone not that he knew that you knew. He was probably in some club, too, doing you don’t even want to know what. You knew when you left that you may be going home to end things.

You were trying not to think about it. Hell, you hadn’t even told Ava. You wanted everyone to have a good holiday and not worry. Besides you wanted to have fun. Which is why the four of you were going to some club tonight.

The four of you had went to dinner at this really nice restaurant. There were a few times when you’d caught Ransom looking at you all weird. “What?” You wrinkled your nose.

He cleared his throat before going back to picking at the salmon on his plate. “Nothing.”

As the drinks finally started flowing, you started to get a little loose. Ransom was sitting beside you being all sulky as he sipped from the glass of whiskey on ice.

“What’s wrong?” You asked him. Okay to be honest maybe you were more than a little loose, but you were just trying to have some fun.

“Nothing.” He glanced over at you then back to his drink.

“Hey,” this girl sat on the other side of him. “My friend was wondering if you wanted to dance.”

He raised an eyebrow. “Why couldn’t your friend ask me herself?”

“She’s a little shy, but she’s cute.”

Ransom glanced over at you. “Nah. I’m just sitting here with my friend.”

The girl pouted, but finally left. You snickered. “I’m just sitting here with my friend,” you mimicked. “What too cool to dance?”

“Because I don’t know. I didn’t feel like it.” He shrugged then took another sip of his drink. “Do you wanna dance maybe?” He finally looked over at you and you were almost hypnotized, but managed to keep your composure.

“With you?”

He rolled his eyes. “No, Buttercup, with my grandpa.”

You laughed once again ignoring the nickname. Maybe it was kind of growing on you. It only took a year and a half. You stood up. “Fine, but you better not stomp on my feet.”

“I might on purpose.” He got up standing in front of you. For a minute you thought he might kiss you until he grabbed your hand to pull you onto the dance floor.

You didn’t want to admit this either, but you were having fun hanging out with Ransom. Ava and Simon were understandably in their own little bubble of love and you didn’t want to interrupt.

After the club Simon had the bright idea of going in the hot tub to warm up. Since you were all a little tipsy that sounded like a great idea.

You had to wear your long sweater out of the house since it was freezing. You in your own little space while Ransom seemed to scoot way to close to you. The four of you were just talking mostly. Enjoying the hot water after being in the freezing cold.

All of you were talking when Ava gave Simon a kiss, which got deeper to the point where they were showing you way more than you needed to see. “I think I speak for both of us in that we really do not want to witness the two of you procreating,” Ransom said.

Ava made a face at him while Simon laughed. He whispered in her ear where she pecked his lips again. The both of them started getting out right after. “We’ll see you two in the morning.” He grinned.

“Goodnight!” She said.

“Night,” you and Ransom said in unison.

You went to the side that your incredibly horny friends had been on which had been across from him. His eyes were closed with his head tilted back. You splashed water at him making him jump a little.

“Hey!” He splashed you back. You laughed as you did it a second time. “Alright, alright,” he said.

You did it again for good measure. “Can’t have someone seeing you have too much fun.”

He went back to his previous position this time putting his muscular arms on the ledge. You wouldn’t care to admit how long you stared at his biceps and shoulders. Then taking the quickest glance at his abs. Then that neck that you kind of wanted to put your mouth on. This is bullshit.

Why was he allowed to be this hot? It couldn’t be enough that he was an asshole. He had to be hot about it. Okay you looked at his pecs and tried to see if you could get a glance of what may have been in his swim trunk. Whatever.

“What are you doing?” He caught you, a smirk appearing on his annoyingly perfect face.

“It’s called minding my own business,” you replied. “You should try it.”

He laughed. “You’re such a brat.” You shrugged turning your head to look at nothing. “Is that what your sugar daddy sees in you?”

“He’s not my sugar daddy. I mean he buys me things like for my birthday, but... that’s not what our relationship is about. I don’t even know if we are in a relationship anymore.” You don’t know why you were spilling all of this to Ransom of all people.

Ransom frowned. “What happened?”

You looked down and sighed blowing out your cheeks after. “Well...” you sighed again. Your stomach was turning now. “You have to take it to your grave.”

“I won’t tell anyone.”

You rolled your eyes. “Promise?”

“I promise.”

You sighed, biting your lip weighing in your options. On one hand it wasn’t Ransom’s business. You really hadn’t told Ava this. You didn’t want her to worry.

“So, he’s not my sugar daddy,” you said, hoping he got the hint.

You could tell he did by the grin on his face and the way he raised his eyebrows. “You?” He explained. “No there’s no way and here I always thought you’d be boring in bed.”

You rolled your eyes. “Shut up no you didn’t.”

“I took you for a dead fish kind of girl,” he teased. “It’s always the cute ones.”

Your eyes widened at what he said. Then so did his when he realized what he said. “Anyway, so yeah that’s how we started off as,” you decided to ignore what he’d just said.

“Alright so go on.”

“Yeah, so it turns out I’m not the only one,” you said. “He’s been going to these clubs and he doesn’t think that I know.”

His jaw dropped. “This is the plot twist I really wasn’t expecting. I gotta tell ya.”

You shook your head. “Shut up.” You splashed him again.

“Stop!” He laughed, doing it back to you.

As you kept splashing at him, he came over to you, grabbing your hands to keep you from doing it again. “Let go of me.” You laughed.

“No.” He wasn’t laughing anymore. Just looking at you. Fuck he was putting you under his spell. You were supposed to not looking into his eyes. How did you make this mistake so many times? “Y/N, I... don’t make things weird.”

“What?” You laughed.

“Yeah. Don’t make this weird,” he said again softly before brushing his lips against yours finally.

“And here I’d always heard that you were a ladies man, Ransom,” you teased. “That was kind of weak.”

“Yeah, well maybe you bring out the worst in me.” A dopey smile had spread across his face. It was okay because there was one on yours too.

“Oh whatever.” You rolled your eyes still smiling. He leaned over to kiss you again but you put your hand against his lips to stop him. “I’m getting kind of tired actually.”

You walked back to your room. All wrapped in your sweater because fuck it was freezing now. You also wouldn’t say this out loud, but his lips felt really nice. As you made it to the bedroom the two of you were sharing, he came on not too far after, grabbing your arm to pull you into a kiss. He’s so dramatic.

As his lips worked against yours, you wrapped your arms around his neck. He felt so good. You can’t remember the last time David kissed you like this. “Fuck it’s actually really cold,” Ransom said.

You laughed. “I know I’m freezing.”

“How about we take a shower,” he said. “Maybe we could save some water together?”

“Oh yeah. We would totally be helping the environment.”

He grabbed you hand to lead you the rest of the way. You pulled off your wet clothes. As soon as you felt time hot water on your skin, you moaned. “

Jesus Christ, why not shower in hell,” he hissed.

“I’m already there.” You threw your arms around his neck. He leaned down to kiss you again. Pawing at your ass. He was so close this time.

You tried to act like nothing had happened as you finished getting ready for bed. As you got all settled under the covers, you felt your body finally start to warm up. He slid in next to you. This was the first time that you didn’t even attempt to put the wall of pillows up.

He pulled you all close to him. “You little shit! Are you naked?” You gasped.

He laughed. “Yeah. I don’t even know why you bothered.”

“Who said I was going to do anything with you?”

“Well, what if I tell you that,” he said, grabbing a handful of your ass, “I actually maybe sort of have feelings for you.”

Ah fuck.

Well, obviously.

But, ah fuck.

Why were you supposed to hate him again?

Because he was a giant asshole. He was rude to the help. Rude to everyone. Even you. Yet you still liked his stupid smug smile. That annoying laugh. You liked how he’d been surprisingly good company for this whole trip. Liked how he was holding you right now. You were pretty sure he could get an ugly haircut and you’d still like him. How he looked at you even when he was irritated with you.

Waiting for you to say something back.

“I... I have feelings for you, too.” You bit your lip after like you were nervous about what he might say back.

“Yeah?” He said with another dopey smile covering his face.

You nodded right before he bridged the gap first. Pressing your lips to his. His mouth moving ever so softly against yours. Like he was afraid you’d run away if he moved to quickly.

You deepened it and he finally pushed you down on your back. Ransom grabbed the back of your leg so you’d wrap it around his waist. Fuck he was already growing against you. “I still can’t believe you got dressed,” he pulled away to whisper in your ear. “You should have known I was just going to take everything off.”

You rolled your eyes. “Ever think that’s part of the fun.”

He chuckled before kissing you again. “Oh yeah?” He pulled away so he could start pulling down your sleep shorts. “You wanted me to take your clothes off?” You nodded, looking into his eyes. He hissed. “Didn’t even put-on panties, dirty girl.”

You laughed. “Do you like it?”

“Oh, I really, really like it.” He reached down to rub his hand up and down your slit. “What a pretty little pussy.”

You gasped. “Fuck.” His hands felt so good on you. He’d barely even touched you and it felt so, so good. Finally, his finger grazed your clit. He traced along it in a circle. “Stop teasing me!” You whined.

“Be patient, Buttercup.” He smirked.

“I’m going to kill you.”

“Shit,” he stopped, “I don’t have a condom.”

You shrugged. “I’m on birth control.”

He smirked. “Yeah, you want me to fuck you raw, Baby. Want me to cum in you?” He leaned back down to kiss your neck this time. His thumb was pressing into your clit now. Going on sweet, sweet circles. He stopped for a minute to pull off your top.

When you were fully naked and he finally put his mouth on your nipples, you needed him to just fuck you. “Please, Daddy,” you whimpered.

He went back to kissing your neck. “Yeah? You want me to be your daddy? Want me to take care of you.”

“God, yes.”

He lined himself up at your entrance. Looking into your eyes as he started to push into you. You closed your eyes tightly. “No, no open your eyes. I want you to look at me while I fuck you,” he commanded.

You nodded doing as you were told as he made you stretch over the thick head of his cock. You were so fucking wet just from him touching you like that. Your skin felt like it was on fire. You cried out as he inched into you. Fuck he was bigger than you’d expected. He was making you feel so full.

“Ransom,” you whimpered, he started out with shallow thrusts not going all the way in.

“Fuck, you’re fucking tight,” he groaned. “Can you even take it?”

You nodded. “I can take it, Daddy.”

He steadied his hips before finally shoving himself all the way inside of you. You gasped as he started fucking into you going so deep. Little droplets of tears formed in the corners of your eyes.

He was fucking you so good, your brain went blank. All you wanted was him. Wanted him to never stop fucking you. “Oh my god,” you whined.

“Yeah. Feels good?”

You nodded as you tried to take it. “Yes, Daddy.”

“Daddy making you feel good?” He panted. “Daddy’s gonna always make your pussy feel good, Baby. I’m gonna take care of you. Buy you whatever you want. Give you every fucking thing your boyfriend wouldn’t.”

Your pussy was gripping his dick like a vice. How were you so close already. “Please?”

“Is that what you want?” He asked in that condescending voice, you’d always hated, but fuck he was going to make you cum because of it. “Want me to buy you nice things. Be your boyfriend. Give you a fucking family.”

If he wasn’t balls deep inside of you, you would have probably reacted differently to him confessing that he wanted something with you. More than just this, but fuck hearing it like this only made you that more far gone. “Yes!” You moaned a little too loudly.

He clamped his hand over your mouth to shush you. “Shhh, Baby. You don’t want everyone to hear you getting dicked down do you? Want everyone to hear me fucking you?”

You shook your head, but stopped as you tilted your head back because you couldn’t stop it. Your eyes got all glazed over as your orgasm hit. 

“That’s it, cum for me.” He breathed. “Fuck. I’m gonna cum in your pussy.”

“Yes,” you whimpered. You could feel him so deep in your stomach. You can’t remember the last time you got fucked like this. No one else had ever been able to do this to you. 

As he finally couldn’t hold out anymore, cumming deep inside of you he still moved his hips. Making sure you got all of him.

He laid on top of you for a minute, not pulling you as you both came down from your orgasms. It felt like your heart was going to beat out of your chest. How the hell were you going to explain this to everyone. 

He rolled beside you before pulling you into his arms. You rested your head on his shoulder. Still trying to catch your breath. “Fuck.” He laughed. 

You chuckled. “I know.”

“Why did we wait so long to do that again?” He asked.

“Because I hated you.” You didn’t mean to let out a bigger laugh because your lower half was way too sore for that. 

He rolled his eyes. “Bullshit. No, you didn’t.”

“I wanted to.”

“Brat.” He chuckled. “I just... I meant everything I said.”

“What?”

“That I wanna be with you...” he replied. “That I wanna make an honest woman outta you.” You rolled your eyes, trying to maintain that damn facade. He was making it hard because this smile spread across your face. “I’ll even let you live with me when you pack your shit out of that old man’s house.”

“Moving so quickly? Ransom, I’m shocked at you.”

“Look, I’ve put up with your shit for a year a half already,” he explained, “I already know that I want you.”

“You fucking sap!”

“Yeah, yeah, yeah. Why don’t you suck my dick about it?” He rolled his eyes.

You shrugged. “Okay.”

“Really?”

“Yeah.”

----------

You didn’t fall asleep until the sun was already coming up. Every time you tried before that; Ransom would start kissing your neck. You were exhausted, but satisfied in a way you hadn’t been in a long time.

You woke up to rustling on the bed. You tried to feel for him because although you were still cozy you wanted his warmth, but he wasn’t there. “Ransom?” You yawned, peeking your eyes open to him fixing the comforter. 

Oh.

“Hey, Baby,” he said with a smile on his face. He leaned over to kiss your forehead. “I gotta go, okay. I have some errands I have to run.”

You nodded, before wrapping your arms around him. He held you to him tightly kissing your forehead more. “Do you have to?”

“Mhmm,” he replied. “I told Simon I’d help him with this surprise for Ava

“Okay. I love you,” you replied sleepily before dozing off again. He smiled down at you before laying you back down, kissing your forehead before leaving. 

You woke up again to Ava jumping up and down on your bed. “Get up!” She cheered. 

“What are you twelve?” You grumbled. Then your eyes cracked open when you fucking realized you’d told Ransom that you loved him. “Oh no.”

“What? Wait, are you naked?” She raised both of her eyebrows as she got settled beside you in bed. “Did you and Ransom...”

You shook your head, suddenly feeling like you might puke. You fucking told Ransom Drysdale that you loved him. “What? No. I just got really hot last night.”

“Where’s your pillow wall?” She asked with a smirk.

“We were too drunk last night to remember?” 

“Bitch, you slept with Ransom Drysdale!” She gasped. “What about David?”

“Um... David and I are... I was already going to end things with him.

This annoyingly shit eating grin spread across her face. “You dirty slut. Okay, well, I don’t think Simon would mind if you stayed with us until you got back on your feet.”

“Actually, I already found a place. I just... I didn’t want to ruin your fun, ya know.”

She sighed. “Y/N, I’m your best friend. Your problems are my problems. I wouldn’t have cared if you told me. Are you okay?”

“Yeah.” You smiled. 

“So...” another smile spread across her face, “how was it?”

“I have no idea what you’re talking.” You laid back down, turning on your side and ignored her as she continued to ask questions.

You got your nails done with Ava, Trish, and Simon’s sister. Still thinking about what you’d said to Ransom. Nerves had started to settle in that you’d done something wrong. Raking your brain trying to remember if he’d even said anything back. You couldn’t remember.

It was Christmas Eve now and there was supposed to be this super fancy party today that the family apparently threw every year. Of course, you were going to wear the dress Ransom had bought you. There was no question. It fit in more. Besides okay maybe you wanted to look pretty for him whatever.

Neither him or Simon had come back by the time everyone started getting ready. You did your makeup in Ava’s room before going back to yours to get dressed. The was a knock on the door as you’d just finished.

“Hey,” Ransom leaned down to kiss your cheek lightly to not mess up your makeup. Setting down a little gift bag on the bed. “You look... you look beautiful.”

You were going to have to get used to him being nice to you. “Thank you.” 

“Sorry, it took so long. You know Simon. Has to go above and beyond.” He chuckled. 

You waited for him to get ready, checking your phone. David had been texting you throughout the trip. Not that you ever responded. You thought when you’d get to the end of this trip, you’d be dreading the drive home. Instead, you were hopeful of what was to come. 

"So, I kind of got you something,” he said before the two of you could leave the room.

You frowned. “I didn’t get you anything back.”

“That’s okay. I don’t think either of us were expecting this,” he replied. “I just wanted you to know I was serious about everything.”

“Okay.”

He clenched his jaw as he grabbed the bag he’d placed, taking out a jewelry box which he handed you. You looked up at him with those big eyes. “I saw you looking at it at that store so...”

“You’re such a sap,” you sniffled.

He smiled. “I just... when you told me I love you this morning, I didn’t say it back. I wanted to say it when I gave you this so... I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

“Yeah?”

You nodded and he pulled you to him, hugging you tightly. You really didn’t want to mess up your makeup so you forced yourself not to tear up. Except lipstick be damned because you were not, not going to kiss him.

It was taking you everything to not hold his hand as the two of you walked into where the party was starting to pick up a little. He looked so cute in his red sweater. Simon and Ava were being doted on by his grandparents. 

“So, Ava kind of figured it out,” you said as he handed you a glass of champagne. 

“How?” He asked.

“You didn’t lock the door and I was still naked under the covered.”

He snickered. “Should have given her an eye full.”

You shook your head. “I’ll give you an eye full.”

“You already did, Buttercup.” He shrugged.

“Why do you call me that?” You rolled your eyes.

His face started to get all red. You’d never thought in all your days you’d see Ransom blush. Between the two confessing your feelings for one another, of you having sex, you accidently telling him you love him, and him telling you that he wanted to be with you, making him blush made you feel like you’d won whatever game the two of you had been playing.

He sighed. “Well, okay, so when me and my cousin Meg were younger, she was obsessed with the Powerpuff Girls. I didn’t want to admit that I kind of liked it. Your bad attitude reminds me of Buttercup. She was my favorite.” He rolled his eyes looking away from you like he was embarrassed.

“You’re shitting me.” This smile spread across your face.

“Shut up.” He wrinkled up his nose.

“Never would have guessed that under all that wool and assholeness was a sweetheart waiting to burst out of the seams,” you teased him.

“You’re so lucky I think you’re pretty or else I think I might drop kick you.” He sighed.

----------

Christmas Day passed by nicely and easily. Mostly with everyone relaxing. You spent most of it tucked into Ransom’s side drinking hot chocolate watching Christmas movies with everyone because at this point the two of you are just a cliche. Which was fine because you liked it. 

He’d whisper I love you in your ear. Or pull you under the mistletoe because he’s corny. Ava and Simon teased you while Trish swore that she called it, which she kind of did.

When it was time go home you were a little sad. You liked being in this little bubble with him. Now you’d have to go home and deal with having to officially break up with David and having to talk Ransom out of taunting him. Of course, Ava and Simon offered up their place until you got on your feet, but him being him pretty much demanded that you live with him.

Normally you would kick yourself for moving so quickly and you don’t know why, but you saw something in him. Of course, you weren’t going to be able to move all of your stuff out today, but there were two very important things that you needed. David wasn’t even there when you got home. He was probably still at his parents.

“Hope you like cats because I’m not leaving them,” you’d told him as you packed them into their carriers. 

He groaned, throwing his head back. “Fine, but you’re giving me a blowjob as soon as we get home.”

“I wouldn’t have it any other way,” you said before placing a wet kiss on his cheek just to annoy him.  

“Hey, you wanna have sex in his bed before we go?” He asked with a smirk.

“You’re an awful person, you know that?” You put your hands on his chest. “Of course I do.”

“God, I love you.” He grinned before pressing his lips to yours. 

[thoughts-on-bangtan]

“Let’s BTS” asks about “I like you the most” and Jin’s reaction

by Admin 2

First of all, I want to wish you all, far away in the world of Vmin and BTS, a healthy and peaceful Easter, if you celebrate it, and a nice weekend for those who don’t! Since Admin 1 is quite busy right now and currently also participating in Camp NaNoWriMo, I (Admin 2) will take over our blog for a little while though Admin 1 will still be lurking and checking comments etc. I want to emphasize right away (you will probably notice it anyway) that I have no literary talent compared to Admin 1. I'll try to worthily “replace” Admin 1 for the time being and talk to you about Vmin and more.

Unlike Admin 1, I am not so careful with shipping discussions (and I even like them) as long as everything is done respectfully and we’re all sticking to the truth about the BTS members. I don't like criticizing other shippers because I understand that other fans may love their favorite members and ships just as much as we love Vmin or Namjin, but sometimes it’s inevitable that I have to say something.

So, I invite you to a discussion. I am open to discussion.

We got two interesting questions about “Let’s BTS” and specifically Jin’s reaction to vmin and I want to discuss them.

From anon: Hi, just wanted to see what you made of Jin’s reaction to Tae’s message to Jimin on the Let’s BTS show. I’ve seen some people say he looks so done and even annoyed with it. I can understand him looking apprehensive at first because Tae is a bit of a loose canon, but everyone’s reaction after is to laugh and smile and shout but Jin is very stoic. I’m kinda new and wondering whether he isn’t a fan of Vmin’s brand of declaring their love on national TV. Although when I think of how he behaves with Joon - I’d struggle to wonder why he doesn’t like it. Any thoughts?

From anon: Hi, I cannot believe what I’m reading about Tae on some platforms. What is wrong with people? Anyways I wanted to ask you what you thought of Jin’s reaction to Tae’s message for Jimin? I’ve started seeing people saying that Jin hates the fact they’re close that’s why his reaction was weird. I’m a vmin shipper but Jin is my bias and I can’t get my head around the fact that Jin doesn’t love them both dearly. He did look “apprehensive” perhaps but I’d say with Tae being Tae; that isn’t surprising.

In order to answer these two questions and to form my opinion on the matter, I’ve looked at the situation with regard to Jin and other members several times.

I admit that I’m surprised myself that Taehyung went this far. Actually, it's not even about the content of his words, but about the whole circumstance and the atmosphere that he created around his "confession". I don't know who added the music, whether it was a Taehyung hint or simply something the editors and PD thought of, but the whole situation and phrase gained even more "meaning" and "seriousness" through it.

I seemed as though the background music was supposed to make the moment remind everyone almost of a scene from a K-Drama (or one of vmin’s playful roleplays), but it only added to the effect of this being a serious, sincere and weighty moment instead.

Taehyung joked around by turning the table and pretending the envelope was not intended for Jimin, but this just led to an increase in the tension displayed by the members and the moment itself, and yet still Jimin was immediately convinced that he was the one for whom the envelope would be. Everyone was acting (which makes it sound like they were faking it which isn’t what I mean) like they were curious, but you could clearly see everyone's tension and nervousness, especially when looking at Jimin. Taehyung added that the contents of the card within the envelope were for Jimin's eyes only, emphasizing the seriousness and intimacy of what he was about to say. As a result, Jimin’s reaction led to uncertainty, nervousness, and at the same time an awareness of the sincerity and seriousness of Taehyung's words.

The words "I like you the most" are (on a superficial surface level) nothing big when compared to "I love you", but they still had the biggest reaction. Jimin wrote "I love you" to Suga and absolutely no one reacted nervously, everyone joined in on the declaration, and the situation was relaxed and even funny. Why did Taehyung’s words cause such reactions then? Why?

My thought is this: When the envelope was revealed to be for Jimin, it was met with tension by both members and Jimin. We all know that Taehyung can be a bit of a loose cannon sometimes, even on national television, when it comes to Jimin.

Jungkook immediately commented that "it’s about friendship", Suga laughed nervously and loudly, as if he wanted to end the situation quickly, and Jin had a serious face that didn’t seem all too positive or eager about what would happen next.I'm not going to go into Jimin's reaction here, but rather Jin’s, since that’s what the anons were wondering about.

In my opinion, Jin doesn't like situations that slip into seemingly too private matters. He is definitely the kind of person who gives up the least private information. The situation with Vmin clearly didn't suit him. And not because Jin doesn't like Vmin (because that’s simply not true), but because he knew this program would be broadcast nationally and streamed worldwide, that it would be debated, that every word would be analyzed, and most importantly, because the team that recorded the show wasn’t their own but one that belonged to KBS. Jin doesn't want anyone to have access to BTS's private life, after all he even asked the You Quiz editors to cut what he saw as too sad/depressing about his answers so clearly he thinks about and considers many such things. I think Taehyung didn't care all that much, but Jin did care.

Perhaps I will go too far in my analysis and imagination here, but let's not forget that in the near future Jin is going to have to leave for his military enlistment in the highly conservative Korean army, which holds very homophobic views. Any shadow cast on any of the BTS members (even if some of them are already suspected to be queer) can endanger Jin or make it even more difficult for him to perform his service well and safely. The suspicion that two of the members might be in a relationship with each other would make Jin an accomplice, since they belong to the same group and would lead to him also being suspected of being queer, guilty by associating basically. This is my opinion at least.

Jin is the oldest and feels responsible for BTS, much the way Namjoon does as leader, for everyone including Taehyung, because Jin is aware of the wave of hatred that will be/is poured onto Taehyung across sns after such a public statement. According to Jin, in my humble opinion, this is neither the time nor the place to take such a step in such serious manner. As long as everything was done in form of jokes and witty answers, Jin was joining in and having fun, but when it was Tae's turn his face became serious, as if to warn Taehyung. Jin knew that "Taehyung's atmosphere" could/would fluster Jimin and the entire team, and could become the subject of rumors spread by the staff that isn’t their own.

So no, Jin’s reaction wasn’t because he hates vmin or anything like that, because that’s not true on any level, but because Taehyung’s words about liking Jimin the most were perhaps too sincere for the setting they were in, raising too many brows, and that’s potentially why he reacted the way he did. After all, if you watch the 5th Muster concerts, and especially the one in Seoul, when vmin stand at the very end together, Jin approaches them and throws water at them as though to pull them out of their bubble and back into reality. All in good fun and because he simply cares a lot about them.

Also, an alternative and even more simple answer could be that Jin’s face has no relation to anything I just said and doesn’t tell us anything about what he thought about Taehyung’s words. After all in some interviews he also just sits there quietly and watches/listens to the other members and that doesn’t mean anything at all, or at least nothing negative. But since you asked for my thoughts, here they are, though they don’t have to be right.

I actually have no idea what the reactions are to this show in Korea and among the general public, but I've seen the reactions to Tae’s words across various sns, which one of the anons also mentioned so I’d like to talk about those for a moment as well.

My hair stood on end when I read some of the responses/posts about Taehyung. I never thought that people who call themselves ARMY or fans of BTS would have such opinions about any of the members. A wave of hatred literally flooded Taehyung, like Admin 1 previously mentioned in their answer to an ask.

I just wanted to cry. It shocked me how far shipping can go (literally playing with actual, living people with no regard to their own words and thoughts) that it can cause such extreme emotions in "fans". It's hard to say which is more negative and alarming for some, Taehyung potentially really having (romantic and reciprocated) feelings for Jimin, Taehyung's feelings not being for the “right” person, or the mere fact that Taehyung's feelings are for a person of the same gender.

It’s also interesting to see how deceptive some are. I don’t even mean that “Taehyung and Jimin like each other most” is ignored, which it is, but rather that those mutual feelings were manipulated to twist them into a completely different direction and to another person, or turned into mere jokes or sarcasm. As if all of this simply never happened.

On the other hand, the fact that Jungkook unbuttoned his shirt before going on stage for “My Time”, as opposed to him not doing so during rehearsals, has become very important and an example of J*k*ok being in a relationship, how that’s now even clearer than ever before and is an indisputable fact, according to shippers. Apparently, J*k*ok were flirting with each other throughout the entire segment and show and only had eyes for each other. Somehow Jungkook imitating Jimin is the final piece of evidence to prove everything shippers ever claimed and thus, according to them, everyone must now see that they love each other romantically.

I've carefully watched this show three times, this particular segment and everything else too, and frankly I haven't seen anything that could be called anything even close to flirting when it comes to the two main ML ships. I'm mature and I think I know what flirting is and I can “read” the simplest human behavior, but I really couldn’t see any of it. In my opinion, Jungkook imitating Jimin is clear and open and not a secret. I fully understand Jungkook, I would also follow Jimin in his place :-) Jimin's dancing and looks, as well as his professional work ethic, are truly breathtaking, inspiring and worth imitating. However, this has absolutely nothing to do with romantic affection or a romantic relationship between them, in my opinion.

Hence, I fail to understand these behaviors which in turn lead to a wave of hatred against Taehyung and the, repeated, disregard, belittlement and erasure of Jimin’s and Taehyung’s friendship and relationship bond, and even some going as far as pretending anything vmin was simply not there at all just to make their ship seem more real, booo.

[galactic-magick]

Life and Happiness: Logan x Reader

Summary: You’ve been really depressed lately and Logan helps comfort you in his own way. (sort of college AU?)

Words: 1100+                                        

Warnings: Some angst, hurt/comfort, reader is kinda sassy, reader is also depressed (not su*cidal depressed though so no mention of that)

Author’s Notes: Got the idea for this while rewatching “Why Do We Get Out of Bed in the Morning,” basically a self therapy fic lol. I’m more likely to listen to Logan than I am to myself so why not put the words in his mouth? Also I’m thinking about opening Sanders Sides requests again after I finish my WandaVision requests so this is kinda a warm-up for that ig lol

Taglist: @luluwinchester​ @nerve-ous-love​ @zarieslayer​ @amayaisokay​

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“Are you alright?”

You look up to see a somewhat familiar face, or at least you think so. It’s a guy you’ve seen in one of your classes, the one always sitting at the front and wearing a tie as if it’s a special occasion. He seems nice enough, but you’ve never really talked to him.

His words bring you back to reality a bit, your attention moving from your thoughts to your surroundings. It’s dark, it’s late, and no one else is around except for you and him. You’re sitting on an uncomfortable bench with a bag of work you’ve barely touched, and honestly you’re not even sure if you had any intention to do it at all tonight.

“Oh...I’m fine,” you finally say, forcing a smile.

He shakes his head, “It’s not safe to be alone at night. Do you want me to walk you to your dorm?”

“I…” you sigh. “I don’t really want to go back there,”

“Roommate troubles? I understand that,” he laughs.

“No, it’s not that,” you fidget with your hands. “I guess I just feel like I don’t deserve to go get some rest right now, ya know?” you try to play the heavy statement off as a joke, but his face clearly molds to concern.

He sits down next to you, “Taking a break and sleeping aren’t things you earn, they’re necessities. Why don’t you think you deserve to rest?”

“Because I haven’t gotten anything done today, I guess, I don’t know,” you shrug, clenching your fists a bit to hold the tension in. “And I hate myself for it. I just…” you reach for your bag to pack it up. “Never mind, it doesn't matter. You probably don’t get that anyway, you seem like the kind of person that’s good at everything,”

He stops you, taking your bag and setting it aside, “That’s not true,”

“Really?” you exhale. “You don’t have to be modest, man. It’s just a fact,”

“No, that’s your opinion, actually,” he says. “There’s a big difference,”

“Fine, then my opinion is that everything’s probably come easy to you all your life and you don’t understand how I feel right now. Happy?”

“Actually, come to think of it, that’s an assumption, not an opinion,”

“Whatever,” you smirk, almost letting out a genuine laugh. “How about you tell me the facts then, Mr. Know-It-All,”

“My name is Logan,”

“Know-It-All refers to your last name,”

“My last name is Sanders, actually,”

You chuckle, “Alright, Logan Know-It-All Sanders. I’m Y/N,”

“Geez, you’re almost as bad as my roommate,” he huffs. “But pleased to meet you, Y/N,”

“Your roommate gives you nicknames?”

“At least eight times a day, yes,”

“Ah,” you nod. “Alright, I’m sorry, what were you saying?”

“I was saying,” he emphasizes. “That your assumptions about me are completely untrue. I do enjoy learning, yes, but that doesn’t mean it comes easy to me. I have to work hard and study just like everyone else, and sometimes I fall short and fail. Many times, actually. I’m not ‘good at everything,’ I put effort and practice into the things I want to be good at, and eventually I get good at them,”

“Hmm,” your smile fades. “Still, you’re very naturally motivated to do all that. I’m just...not,”

“Why’s that?”

“I’’m only here because I have to be. If I don’t get some sort of higher education I have less of a chance of getting a good job, and I’d like to have at least a somewhat stable life. I gave up on my dreams a long time ago, I’m just trying to survive,” you don’t know why you’re venting to this guy you barely know, yet now that you’ve started you can’t stop. “But it’s not just that. Everything feels wrong, I feel empty, I feel nothing. School isn’t the only thing that brings me down, it’s just life in general. It’s like the weight of the world isn’t just on my shoulders, it’s actively pushing down on them, and it’s just a matter of time until I break,” your face falls to your hands, covering your watery eyes. He probably thinks you’re crazy or overreacting, you should’ve just let him walk you home and not bothered him with your problems.

“Is it happiness that’s left you, or living?” he asks.

You look at him, your voice croaking from holding everything in, “What?”

“You said you don’t feel anything and you’re just trying to survive. So which has truly left you, happiness or the figurative ‘feeling’ of living?”

“I’m...not sure,”

“The way I see it, we are never promised happiness. It’s never a guarantee, it’s not a right, it’s not something we can always count on. Emotions come and go, and just because it’s a positive one doesn’t change that. But living…” he grins. “Living is a gift. Just the fact that you’re here is amazing. You’re breathing, you’re you. It can be easy to forget that, but it’s true. Your life in and of itself has meaning, no matter what you choose to do with it. You may feel like you’re only surviving and working towards the bare minimum, but you’re alive. I guess that’s why I’ve never understood when people feel worthless if they’re not achieving their dreams and greatness and the like, just being alive and experiencing the world seems like enough to me,”

You stare blankly at him, not sure what to say.

“I really shouldn’t keep you any longer,” he checks his watch and hands you your bag. “How about that walk back now?”

You nod, getting up and walking in the direction of your dorm.

It’s a relatively silent stroll, nothing except your breathing and a few cricket chirps. Logan offers to carry your things, leaving you empty handed until you hit your destination. You appreciate the gesture, you just hope he’s not only doing it out of pity.

“I know you believe you don’t deserve it, but I really urge you to get some rest,” he turns to you at the doorway, handing you back your bag.

“I’ll try my best,” you nod with a smile. “Thank you, Logan. For everything,”

“Of course,” he smiles back, handing you a piece of paper as he leaves. “Let me know if you ever need anything,”

You look down to see his number scribbled on the paper, and he waves to you again before turning around the corner.

You never thought Logan Sanders would be the one bringing you comfort on a night like this, but here you are.

And you really hope he’ll do it again.

[sweetsweetkpop]

Sincerely yours

Pairing: Jungwoo x Fem! reader

Genre: Fluff, Smut

Rating: 18+

Aus/Tropes: Non-Idol!Jungwoo, Established Relationship

WC: 4k

Warnings: Marking, Slight Nipple Play, Oral (female receiving), Slight Hair Pulling, Unprotected sex (Wrap it up guys), Creampie

Notes: This is for the NeoSmutCollective Event - Love Letter, and I hope you all enjoy it! Also, the love letters' contents will be in italics like this (also will be colored for my mobile nctzens), so when you see that, you’ll know your reading the love letter!

Jungwoo yawned as he stretched, legs and arms extending to emphasize until he stopped. A smile on his face as he opened his eyes to look beside him, only for it to quickly fall when he realized that you weren’t beside him.

He rubbed his eyes as he looked around for you, rubbing his eyes as he sat up in bed.

He was confused. It was 11:30 in the morning, and you usually like to stay in bed for those extra minutes, curled up into his side and using either his chest or arm as a pillow, especially when neither one of you had any plans. He didn’t mind it, though, because he loves having you close to him.

He swung his legs over the bed, glancing around until his eyes landed on the red envelope on the nightstand. His curiosity grew as he reached for it to open and see what was inside. He immediately recognized your handwriting as he started to read,

Dear Jungwoo,

You don’t understand how hard it was to get out of bed early to plan everything I have done today. When I lay in your arms, I feel safe as if nothing could hurt me and as if they can protect me from all negativity. You hold me so tight that I feel like I’m suffocating from your affection, which I love! I can’t wait to be held in your arms again, but for now, get up, get washed up and dressed, and head to the kitchen. And please just follow whatever my letters say >.<

Sincerely,

Your Sweetheart~

Jungwoo wanted to know what you were planning, his curiosity growing tenfold as he got up and went inside the connecting bathroom. Stripping out of his clothes and quickly hopping in the shower, his mind just thinking of what you took the time to do.

The shower didn’t take too long as he got out, dried off, and quickly got dressed. He dressed in something simple, knowing very well that you would have told him to get dressed fancy. So Jungwoo dressed pretty comfortably; a sweatshirt with some jeans and some comfortable shoes.

He came out of the bedroom and immediately headed to the kitchen. He saw a display of food out on the table, a wide array of foods he enjoyed eating, and it was honestly stunned for a second.

Jungwoo noticed the letter on the table beside the food as he reached to go pick it up and open it

Dear Jungwoo,

If there’s one thing I love doing for you, it must be cooking. I wouldn’t call myself a master chef or anything like that, but you always excite my dishes up like it is. I love watching the big smile on your face when you try something I just made and you getting excited to taste it when I was worried about it. So I went out and made some of your favorite dishes to eat before I send you out. After eating, visit Mark cause he had your next letter. Text me when you leave, and be safe! I’ll see you soon, baby~♡︎

Sincerely,

Your sweetheart

Jungwoo smiled as he was quick to sit down and eat, noticing the food was still warm as he chewed. He could tell how well you timed everything for the food to always be warm by the time he got out of the room. It only made him more impressed by the dedication you took in just for his birthday.

It didn’t take him long to finish the food and put the dirty dishes in the dishwasher before getting ready to head out to Mark’s apartment. Jungwoo grabbed his keys as he went to text you that you were leaving. He left and locked the door as he headed to his car. By the time he got in, he had noticed that you had hearted his message and said nothing else.

Jungwoo chuckled, knowing that you would be secretive today, but he didn’t mind it at all. Jungwoo got situated before heading off to Mark’s. His mood was so high since he just wanted to know what else you had planned for him.

It took about 20 minutes to get to Mark’s apartment as he parked before getting out and eagerly heading up to his friend’s apartment. He took the elevator, foot-tapping with excited jitters until the elevator doors opened on Mark’s floor. He walked down the hall and was ready to knock when Mark opened the door with a smile.

“ Hey, birthday boy.” Mark smiled as Jungwoo went to hug him with a smile, looking over his shoulder, surprised to see his other friends there as well.

“ What’s all this?” Jungwoo asked as he pulled away from Mark, a bit shocked to see everyone there.

“ This should explain everything.” Mark handed him the letter as Jungwoo quickly opened it to read it as the others watched.

Dear Jungwoo,

You probably weren't expecting this, but I wanted you to spend time with your friends. Not only does it give me some time to add the finishing touches for your birthday, but it would just be wrong for me to be selfish and have you for the whole day. Mark helped me out a lot in planning and getting things for you, and everyone else gave their inputs in as well, which I’m grateful for. Your friends have almost become my friends, and they’re like the siblings I never got to have. So spend time with the family until I call your phone. Just promise me not to get drunk.

Sincerely,

Your sweetheart

Jungwoo smiled as he put the card down and looked at Mark, “ So you were in on this too?”

“ She asked for help. How could I say no?” Mark giggled as he pushed him towards the crowd of friends, “You heard what she said. Let’s make sure you have some fun before you are whisked away for the rest of the night.”

Jungwoo was there for a while. He had Taeyong and Yuta giving him extra gifts that he wasn’t expecting. He and Mark were playing FIFA and having the rest of the boys cheer for them as Jungwoo would win. Johnny and Jaehyun helped make foods and snacks for everyone that Jungwoo found delicious. The atmosphere was light and bubbly as Taeil and Donghyuck were playing around.

Jungwoo was genuinely enjoying himself. He wasn’t expecting anything special for his birthday, but he found himself merely enjoying everything.

He was there for maybe an hour or two when he heard his phone ring on the table. He immediately stopped what he was doing when he noticed it was you calling him. He put the controller down as he got up and moved from the group, moving far enough, so he could hear you.

“Hello?”

“Hi baby, are you having fun?” Hearing your voice on the phone was soothing. He hasn't spoken to you until now.

“ Yes, I am. I wasn’t expecting you to plan something like this.” Jungwoo admits as he leans against the wall, not noticing how the others have quieted down to listen in potentially.

“ It’s your birthday! Why wouldn’t I do something special?” You laughed, and it was honestly music to his ears, “But I wanted to ask you if you had anything to drink?”

“I only had a shot of soju, and that’s it. I listened.” Jungwoo answered as he heard you hum.

“ You think you're ready to come back home, or did you wanna spend more time there?” You asked him.

“ Depends. Are you going to be home by the time I get there?” Jungwoo’s voice was a bit lower as he spoke, knowing very well that he missed you and was just ready to see you now.

“ I wouldn’t have called if I wasn’t~ Come back home then, Woo. I have your last gifts here. Be safe, and I’ll see you when you get back. Love you.” You hung up before he could respond as he just noticed the silence in the room as he turned to see everyone looking at him.

“ What?” Jungwoo asked, confused.

“ What a lucky man you are,” Johnny said, sipping from his soju bottle as he shook his head.

“What are yo-”

“ What do I have to do to find a woman like that?” Donghyuck joked with a fake whine, earning some chuckles from the others.

“ Do you guys know what she has planned for me?” Jungwoo asked them before Yuta gave him a look.

“ No, but we have a good idea of what it could be,” Yuta answered him, and Jungwoo was ready to ask him something again when he was starting to get pushed out the door by Taeyong.

“ Stop wasting time and go home! She called you, so that means to go home, right? Then leave and don’t leave her waiting!” Taeyong fussed at him with a smile as Jaehyun opened the door for them as he pushed Jungwoo out the door with his presents.

“ We’ll see you tomorrow, Jungwoo! Bye~” Mark yelled before the door was close before Jungwoo could even get a word out. He just shrugged his shoulders as he headed back to his car. He got inside and rushed a bit to get home.

Whether his friends knew what you had planned or not, he wanted to be home with you. He hasn’t seen you all day, and that was motivation enough for him to hurry his ass home. It didn’t take him as long to get back home. Quickly parking the car and leaving the gifts from his friends there, he hurried to make it back up to the apartment. He probably looked crazy the way he was rushing back home. Putting his long legs to use, he was in front of the apartment door, hurriedly putting his keys in the door to unlock it. He pushed the door open and looked around the dimly lit apartment.

He stopped his rushing when he noticed the flower petals that littered the floor, candles lighting the apartment, creating an atmosphere that nulled his eagerness as he shut the door and locked it.

He quietly walked inside, taking his shoes off at the door as he followed the trail that started from the door and led him into their shared bedroom. He stepped inside and saw the flower petals forming a heart on the bed with another envelope in the center. It picked it up as he opened it to read the letter inside.

Dear Jungwoo,

Even though I tell you daily how much I love you, I wanted to explain to you the reasons why today. I did luck out in you coming over to talk to me that day. I wasn’t expecting that me giving you my number would lead me to find the love of my life. Our first date was a bit awkward since we were both stuttering and nervous, but I remember how by the end of it, we were both smiling and laughing by the time you brought me back home. I’ll admit that I was anxious when we would talk or go on dates.

I thought, ‘Everything is going too good for me. Something must happen.’ I know it’s foolish looking back on it now, but I haven’t had something as good as you before. Every insecurity I had, you pushed it away until you were able to close that distance that I realized I had placed between us until we were face to face. You made me believe in love again and made me treasure every little thing that you’ve done for me.

Now I can’t imagine my life without you at this point. I can’t help but thank your mom for giving birth to you cause she ended up giving birth to my soulmate. I could honestly make this wayyyy longer if I wanted to, but if I did that, then you would be standing here forever. To sum up, everything that I wanted to say, just know the I love you with every fiber of my being. I won’t change anything in my life if it means I can be with you now and forever. I love you, Kim Jungwoo

Happy Birthday baby

Sincerely,

Your Sweetheart

Jungwoo couldn’t stop the smile that formed on his face. He felt like his cheeks would hurt by the end of it cause he just couldn’t take the smile off his face. Never in his life has he gotten something so sweet from anyone. He knew you meant every word you said, and that’s what made his heartbeat as fast as it did.

His attention was brought back when he heard the bathroom door open. Jungwoo’s head whipping around to see you pushing the door, leaning against the door frame in a robe that was left open as you stared at him with a small smile. “ Did you like my letter?”

Jungwoo didn’t answer you as he crossed the room to you in three steps, pulling you into his body as he leaned down to kiss you. You were quick to kiss him back as his hand rested at the nape of your neck with your hands resting on his broad shoulders. You both didn’t realize how breathless the kiss would be. Neither one of you has seen the other since last night, and seeing each other now after that amount of time seemed like forever to you both.

Jungwoo didn’t pull away until he knew that you both needed air. When he pulled away, your lips were already starting to get puffy. He looked up at you, and he couldn’t stop the laugh that left his throat.

“ God did I miss you and your kisses,” Jungwoo admits, and it made you laugh as you wrapped your arms around his neck.

“ I missed you too. I would have stayed home with you if I didn’t have this plan.” You told him as his arms wrapped around your lower back.

“ I wasn’t expecting you to do something like this, but I do appreciate all of the time and effort you put into it.” Jungwoo smiled, kissing your forehead as you rested your head against his chest right after.

“ I’m happy that you did. I rewrote that last letter so many times cause I felt they weren’t good enough. It still wasn’t enough, but I hope what I wrote is good enough.” You mumbled before feeling his hand under your chin, lifting your face to look at him.

“ Everything that you did for me today has been more than enough. I can’t say thank you enough for everything. “ He leans back down to kiss you, and it swallowed down any other words that you planned on saying. You just melted into his arms as he kissed you.

Jungwoo bent down to pick you up in his arms, not breaking the kiss as he gently placed you on the bed, his body hovering over you. His body was resting between your legs, placing one of them on his hip as he pulled away to kiss your throat.

You moved your neck to the side as you felt him place light marks against your skin before you pulled him back up to kiss you. You don’t know how long you were kissing before Jungwoo pulled back away, hovering as his eyes trailed over you.

Jungwoo had the chance to admire the attire that you were wearing finally. It was red lingerie. The top was a halter with a large cut-out in the center with two heart loops connecting them. The bottoms were lace and see-through like the top and were high-waisted, exposing more of your hips and ass because of how it was cut. The silk robe that initially covered up the lingerie set has now slid off to the side that just added more to the image he was looking down at.

“ You are beautiful,” Jungwoo mumbles as his hand reaches down to massage your chest. His fingers were pinching your nipple between the fabric, making your back arch off the bed. He smiled as your moans started to fill the room, leaning down to push the lacy top to the side, wrapping his lips around their other nipple.

Your fingers wrapped in his fluffy hair, tugging whenever he would nip at your chest. He would leave little marks over your body that he knew you would show off with pride, uncaring of who sees.

Jungwoo’s mouth had traveled down your chest, passed your stomach, and had his face hover you're between youth legs. He looked up at you for a split second before eagerly tugging them down your legs.

“ Wait a minute! I should be pleasing you. It’s your birthday!” You rambled as you tried to keep your legs closed, built couldn’t with jungwoo’s firm grip. He laughed as he stared, enjoying how you were already wet for him when he didn’t do much.

“ Well, since it’s my birthday, you should be listening to what I say. Plus, you worked hard today to plan everything for me, so let me at least repay you for your hard work.” Jungwoo smiled as he kissed your inner thigh.

You watched his mouth slowly descend onto you as he slowly dragged his tongue up your pussy. He took his time to work your body. His movements were slow, precise, and teasing.

Jungwoo made sure to have his fill while eating you out. He didn’t care about how you tugged at his hair when he would give a hard suck to your clit or when he had his friends pressed inside you, prodding your g-spot to make your back arch off the bed.

Your taste was addicting. Something about it, making the grip around your thighs fighting as he pulled you close: your moans only fuel him to dip his face in more as he groaned against your body.

You felt your legs tremble, your orgasm coming up close as Jungwoo started to become unrelentlessly. His full lips were wrapped around your clit as he sucked hard, his fingers curling up into you. His fingers rubbing deep is as he worked your body simultaneously as he gave another suck at the same time that he pressed inside you.

Jungwoo knew exactly what he was doing. He knew that him doing that was just enough to get your body to tip over. He held your body down as you convulsed against his lips, working your body back down slowly as he slowly removed his lips.

Licking his lips, Jungwoo liked how disheveled you looked on the bed. Legs spread open with some small after shakes from the orgasm as your chest raised up and down, the robe having slid down your shoulders as you moved around.

You barely paid attention to when Jungwoo stripped from his clothes, throwing his shirt and pants somewhere else as you squealed when Jungwoo pulled your body back to his by your legs.

You looked up at him as he smiled at you, “ You still want to keep going or no?” He asked you, rubbing your leg with gentle touches, and it made you smile.

How could he go down on you like that, then be sweet to you right after?

Nevertheless, you nodded as you watched him line himself up, leaning back down to kiss you as he slowly pushed himself inside. Both of your moans get swallowed into the kiss as he slowly bottoms out.

He made sure to wrap your legs around his body as he pressed his tongue inside your mouth as he pulled his hips back and pushed them back inside.

Jungwoo’s thrust was slowed but deep, making sure to reach the parts of you that you could never reach yourself. Jungwoo had his arms wrapped around your body as he moved his hips against yours.

You felt it getting harder to kiss him when his thrusts got a bit faster, turning your head to the side as he could hear your moans getting louder. Jungwoo leaned back down to kiss your throat before trailing up to your ear. His voice was smooth like velvet as he groaned in your ear, his brows knitted as he felt your walls squeeze around him.

You reached for his hand to grab, Jungwoo quickly lacing his fingers with yours as he kissed your cheek. “ You don’t even understand how much I love you.”

You turned your head to look at Jungwoo as he halted his movements to lift your body, now having you sitting in his lap as he looked at you. You snatched your robe off as you wrapped your arms around his broad shoulders and started to roll your hips against him, earning a quick groan from him.

“Does it feel good?” You asked him, watching his facial expressions as his hands held your hips.

“ You always feel good.” Jungwoo smiled, and you could stop the light-hearted giggle that left your throat, being quickly replaced with a moan as he pulled your body down more on his length.

You pulled his body close to yours, feeling like you were meant to be like this with him. It just felt too good as you started to leave your little marks against his neck that he would turn to the side to give you more space. Jungwoo was beginning to thrust up into you, his rhythm becoming wilder, and it was just pushing you closer to another orgasm.

You pulled back to stare at him. His lips even puffier than before, his hair sticking to his forehead from sweat, and his brown eyes filled with a mix of lust and adoration that just had you getting lost into them. You wondered if you had the same type of look in your eyes as he looked into yours.

Neither one of you had to speak.

You both knew how close you all were to cumming.

He gave you one last look. One that looks like he was waiting for an answer. An answer to a question that you knew he was conveying through his eyes. So you nodded as you leaned back in to kiss him—and coming back up to the nape of your neck to keep you there. You were meeting his thrust as muffled moans echoed in the bedroom.

It didn’t take much longer as Jungwoo pulled you down to fully sit on his cock, making you dig blunt nails into his shoulders as his orgasm triggered yours as your legs spasmed. Jungwoo held your body close to his as he stilled.

Panting was heard throughout the room as you both tried to get your breathing to slow. As you tried to catch your breath, you felt Jungwoo nuzzle into the side of your face making you smile.

“ Jungwoo?” You watched him turn his face up to look at you.

“Yes?” Jungwoo tilted his head at you.

“ I love you sooo much.” You kissed his cheek and didn’t stop at his cheek as he started to laugh before making you kiss his lips again.

“ I know you do and I love you so much too. You really outdone yourself for my birthday today!” Jungwoo smiled as he looked at the flower petals on the floor.

“ I still have a dinner and birthday cake for you too in the kitchen.” You explained to him, ready to move out his arms but he held you there. You looked at him and he gave a playful look.

“ Dinner sounds nice and all, but I’m not finished with you yet. I haven’t seen you all day until now, so I’m gonna have my fun with you.” Jungwoo was smiling as he lays you back down.

“ Wait! But what about your dinner?! It will get cold!” You tried to argue with him and that only made his smile grow bigger. You weren’t trying to get turned on but you already felt his cock inside you get hard again.

“ We can heat that up later and still want to finish the dessert I have in front of me.” Jungwoo went down an octave as he looked over your body again before meeting your wide eyes again.

You definitely knew you were in for a treat and a long night.

[my-writings-and-musings]

hello!! i loved your last prompt and and i am also severely deprived of that sweet angst hahah;;; would you mind writing it for either swerve or whirl? thank you!! ❤💙

I take it you mean the oxygen prompt, and please correct me if I misunderstood, but if so I've got them here and I made them extra angsty for you! Fair warning there's some mild alien gore in Whirl's.

For the various posts of this prompt, I'll list the parts below!

Part One: Here!

Part Two: You're Here!

Part Three: Here!

Part Four: Here!

Part Five: Here!

Part Six: Here!

Part Seven: Here!

Part Eight: Here!

Part Nine: Here!

Part Ten: Here!

Part Eleven: Here!

Part Twelve: Here!

Swerve

·The two of you often chill in his bar together at odd hours, partially because the ship doesn't technically have a day or night beyond an artificial schedule that affects how bright the lights are, but mostly because you love having the special time just to yourselves and no bot else. You'll chat about earth culture, come up with drink ideas, tell wild stories that lead to even wilder jokes... More often than not you get very little productive done, but Swerve treasures every memory of you laughing atop the bar while he talks.

·It's either late night or early morning, technically, when an alarm briefly sounds before fizzling out. Confused by the lack of follow up commands, Swerve opts on the side of caution when he can't get anyone to respond by communicator, though it looks like they might've just been hit by an electric storm that's briefly knocked everything offline. Still, he follows protocol and seals the two of you inside.

·While the mood has been a little dampened, he refuses to let things get unpleasant, especially with no clear threat to worry about. The two of you decide to chill behind the bar and relax a little bit, as you're both a bit tired but obviously can't get any sleep with things being the way they are, and Swerve takes advantage of the quiet to do even more talking.

·He wants to cuddle with you, but he's way too afraid of rejection to ask, and as a result of that fear your relationship hasn't gone much further than hand holding or a few tender kisses. As even a little peck on his nose incapacitates him, you try to let him take the lead on affection for both your sakes. It's his very hesitation though, that prevents him from initially speaking up when you start nodding off at an alarming rate, nearly tipping over from your seated position on the floor.

·When he has to throw out a hand to keep you from falling back and hitting your head against the bar, he finally cracks. You snap to full consciousness, or as much as you can, to find yourself tired beyond all reason and the air around you stale and unnatural. It had been easy to ignore while focused on the adorable minibot, but now it's alarming, and combined with the earlier oddities you're forced to conclude something is wrong.

·He puts on his bravest face and doubles down on establishing communication, not that he's an expert on that front, but his determination and knowledge in other fields lets him get to work on a makeshift communicator that should be able to cut through any interference. You just try to stay awake and listen, as he talks non-stop while he works like nothing is amiss, but the nervous tremble in his hands gives away his internal panic.

·A brief and flimsy connection to an emergency channel doesn't make either of you feel better, but it does allow you to finally find out what's going on, as the panicked explanation from the other end lays out the chaos breaking out due to an enemy ambush that's not currently going well for either side. Much of the ship's infrastructure has been damaged, and while the invading forces are scattered, it's currently easier to list the systems that aren't malfunctioning. Swerve is too horrified by the mention of an atmospheric generator shutdown and forced expulsion to ask for instructions before the line goes dead.

·There's a full minute of unbreakable panic on his part, and only biting down on his fist prevents him from saying all the horrible thoughts racing through his head. He's a smart bot, he knows that downed atmospheric generators are bad for the ship, but absolutely fatal for you if not fixed fast enough. He's near a full on panic attack when you try to rise and comfort him, only to stumble and fall as the dizziness overwhelms you.

·Though you don't even break skin with your small tumble, he's immediately by your side and frantically asking if you're okay, gingerly lifting you off the floor as you reassure him with far more levity than the situation calls for. Realizing that oxygen must already be dangerously low, and that the shortage is likely responsible for your exhaustion and disorientation, he concludes he's on his own in regards to planning a way out of this. A lack of response through the communication line he rigged up confirms this.

·Still a mess but keeping it together for your sake, he sets you up behind the bar and finds some clean towels, ordinarily used to polish tables, and sets them up as a makeshift little bed for you to rest on. His experience with medicine is unfortunately not going to give him much aid in this situation, but he knows enough to realize you'll benefit from rest and calm instead of panic. He tries to explain this, but you can barely follow the rapid stream of words leaving his mouth as he lays you down, and his worry actually spurrs your clouded mind to try and comfort him.

·For once he pushes away your offered hand, despite loving your tender touch more than anything and having a terrifying inkling he may have limited time left to enjoy the comfort it brings him. Arming his security system, he prays he won't have to use it as he hunkers down and tries to keep you relaxed with more casual conversation, but the words feel meaningless as he looks into your dimming eyes.

·The two of you sit for what feels like hours, and his attempts at distracting you fade into more and more desperate pleadings for you to stay awake. Eventually he takes your hand between two of his own, his large palms gently holding yours between them as he blends begging with apologizing. You're only more confused by this, as the fog of exhaustion isn't enough for you to forget he's not at fault for anything.

·It's in this rambling that he confesses the true depth of his love for you, going on about what a wonderful person you've been to him and how every day since he's met you has been the best of his life... but he was so afraid of messing it up he always hid these feelings for fear of scaring you away. Now he knows that all he accomplished was wasting some of the precious time you two had together, and he promises not to make the mistake again if you get better and he has a second chance.

·In the haze of hypoxia you find the confession unbearably sweet, and smile up at the precious face you fell in love with at the first cheesy smirk. You were beginning to fear he'd never make his move...

·Your last moments of consciousness are lost to a solid banging against the door, one that's quickly overtaken by a not so friendly pounding and the denting of the solid metal by something big and heavy. Security systems primed, he grabs his blaster and prepares himself, suddenly far less afraid and far more angry. He won't let fear prevent him from keeping you safe.

·Aliens of unknown species storm the bar with weapons blazing, and the scene descends into chaos. His security system starts shredding the first of the attackers, but there's simply far too many of them to get them all, and your little hiding spot becomes their target in no time. Despite all your desire to stay awake and help, the oxygen content is just too low, and you slip into darkness while his optics turn one final time to you. The sight drives him to act.

·With everything he has, he opens fire and stands his ground, taking shots himself but hardly feeling the pain. Their numbers are reduced but simply too overwhelming, and he's forced to face them head on when they start closing in, enduring more and more egregious damage as he leaves the cover of the bar to brawl. He wishes he could say he saved the day, but his smaller form is beaten down and he's only able to watch as they close in on you... before Autobot reinforcements burst in to turn the tide.

·He's bleeding and nearing unconsciousness himself when the two of you are carried to the medical bay, and the last thing he sees is you clinging to life in another bot's arms... It should make him feel relieved, but he only drifts off in absolute misery over his failures. He couldn't keep you safe, he couldn't get you help, and he couldn't even overcome his fear to show you the love you deserved until you were at death's door. The feeling doesn't abate when he awakens in the medical bay to find you both alive and the threat defeated.

·Ignoring all medical warning, he drags his still aching body to your side the moment you're alone, tearing up at the sight of you so weak and your beautiful face obscured by an oxygen mask, and despite his relief to see you alive he can only cry. When you wake at the sound he's nothing but shoulder shaking sobs and apologies, and though your memory is blurred you're well aware that the blame he's putting on himself is entirely unwarranted. You use all of your strength to keep your mask on while embracing him from the berth.

·Accustomed to his low self esteem, you refuse to hear it this time, and remind him that as the bot who charged headfirst into enemy fire he's likely the only reason you're still alive. You fell in love with him because he's the kind of bot to always push on, no matter how afraid he may be, and if the two of you are indeed going to be more open from now on... you'd like to emphasize that you love him back. More than you've ever loved anyone. Your words encourage him to heft his aching frame onto the berth with you, where he tearfully returns your profession of love once again, before managing to maneuver the two of you side by side for the cuddling he always wanted. There's a lot you two will have to talk about, but for now it can wait, and you're so comfortable Ratchet can't bring himself to mandate Swerve return to his own berth when he returns.

Whirl

·As he's taken it upon himself to get you battle ready, the two of you are in the shooting range together as you often are, though the activities vary from actual practice to pure shenanigans. On occasion he'll try "trick shots" to show you what combat prowess really looks like, and apparently in his view it resembles standing on his head and trying to nail targets with his chest mounted guns. His level of accuracy would strike fear into the sparks of his enemies but honestly he finds your laughter to be a better reward.

·Being as wary of exterior threats as he is, and experienced at surviving them, he gets the sense of some impending trouble not too long before the alarm goes off. Instructing you to keep your tiny weapon, he keeps his own ready to go and pops you into his cockpit, both for the sake of safety and so you can "watch the show" if he runs in to anything. While he's calm and casual as ever, maybe even a little eager, you know there's a bit of caution holding him back. Otherwise he'd be sprinting down the halls and trying to figure out where the fun is before he misses any of it.

·When it becomes clear communication is being jammed, he opts to drop you off somewhere safe so he can sort things out, and the few bots you pass along the way aren't able to offer much help thanks to everyone being equally confused. In the end he decides his own room may be the safest place for you, as it's not too far and you know it well. Plus, you can always scamper off into the vents if things go sideways.

·You're halfway there before encountering your first enemy; an alien of unknown species who's not too tiny next to the sizable copter bot, and who wastes no time before trying to flee. Recognizing a scout when he sees one, Whirl pounces to take care of the threat, encouraging you to "watch and learn" while he gets a little showy in the headshot he follows up with a decapitation to be safe.

·You've seen him in action enough to expect these things, and while you're ordinarily his top morale booster when he fights, you find yourself a little too sluggish to provide your usual enthusiasm in your praise. Picking up on your lack of energy, he asks if you'd prefer more screaming for the next one, partially sarcastic despite you being fully aware he'll do it if you say yes. You brush off the fatigue and dizziness clouding your head as motion sickness from the ride.

·Ever cautious about your delicate organic nature, he decides to play it safe and see if he can get more information before continuing his blind trek through hazardous territory, though his plans likely won't change much from killing every enemy he sees. A somewhat functioning maintenance terminal at least gives him a chance to check up on the status of whatever is still working, so he pulls up the current readout. What he sees chills his spark.

·They haven't just been boarded by a large enemy ship, the Lost Light has actively been hacked, and the damage extends far beyond the communication systems being jammed. The atmospheric generators have been shut off and air is actively being purged from the ship, which is a slow process due to its size, but the concentration of carefully maintained elements is already dropping. That wouldn't be more than an inconvenience if you didn't need the oxygen being dumped to live.

·Barely able to skim the screen in the time it takes him to soak it all in, you're jostled and shocked when he pivots on his long legs and tears down the hallway in the opposite direction, leaving you in an even more confused fog than you'd been in previously. Though he's prone to unexpected decisions, this feels more like the result of panic.

·Answers to the questions you begin directing his way initially aren't forthcoming. All you get is uncharacteristic shushing or hushed murmurs not directed your way, his path starting and stopping seemingly at random to a destination you're far too out of it to guess. It isn't until you testily demand an explanation that you get one laden with frustration; he's trying to get you to the medical bay without any fighting!

·You're rendered speechless by the very idea. Whirl? Avoiding a fight? His unorganized and circular explanation about atmospheric generators wouldn't make sense even if you were coherent, but as it's getting harder and harder just to sit up, you don't have the energy to argue with him. His running almost makes it feel like you're hovering along, and despite the panic radiating through his frame, you find that the exhaustion weighing you down is quite hard to resist even as you strain drawing breath.

·Every minute he can feel you struggling, his naturally attuned senses picking up your faltering vitals as he would the weakening ticks of a fading clock. For once he's trying to be cautious despite every wire of his being screaming at once, clouding his processor as he tries to take an indirect path that won't involve a fight, painfully aware that you might not survive combat with a multitude of foes attacking him at once. Of course the delay is dangerous too, but what can he do? Keeping you alive is his only priority.

·As he's come to expect though, luck never favors him, and you're just stable enough to see the horde of enemies appear virtually out of nowhere as he closes in on the medical bay. Through the cockpit glass you have moments to process the threat before he growls out a promise; he's going to get you through if it kills him, but if you die before that he's gonna be pissed, so keep that little pump of yours beating, okay?

·Any remaining clarity in your head is gone in moments as everything descends into a bloodbath. Bullets fly through the hallway and blades start cutting in a maelstrom that's brutal even by his own standards, resulting in blood spattered glass obscuring your vision. All you have then is the lurching of his body as he strikes and the cacophony of battle, but you keep yourself breathing through it all, determined not to let him down.

·He's the most brutally effective he's ever been on such short notice, to the point he'd be grateful you can't see what he's reducing these aliens to, not that he's enjoying himself either. His chest is his only concern when it comes to defense, resulting in increasingly grievous wounds to every other part of his body, not that he cares too deeply. Every alien is just a collection of vital parts he needs to deconstruct, and he does so with everything he has available, even tearing his claws into vulnerable weak points when his sword is momentarily knocked away.

·By the time he's up to his knees in corpses he's losing all patience. He could have been at the medical bay by now, could have found a way to rig up some kind of atmosphere scrubber himself if necessary, but instead he's stuck tearing his way through these idiots. Do they have any idea what's at stake for him? What he'll do if he loses you now? As his strikes become cold and automatic, his thoughts drift back to the dark corners he'd only just started to leave behind, and he's left with a familiar feeling.

·He's angry. Not just in the logical sense, it's the raw and primal anger that has kept him alive but haunted for eons. He's angry at these cowards for killing you in a way that you can't really fight. Angry at the very air around you both, and how it keeps slipping away like the delicate tools his claws are too clumsy to hold, taking everything he adores about you with it. But worst of all he's angry at himself for falling in love, and painting a giant target on himself in the process, one he can't tell you how sorry he is for dragging you into.

·The burning will to survive blinds him to familiar color schemes until one is right in front of him, blocking his blade and screaming his name until an optic he didn't know was cracked is able to make out a team of Autobots. Ringing audials blur their words, not that he cares what they have to say. Ignoring them completely, he pries open his cockpit with what he realizes is his only functional arm, and pulls out your barely conscious form to wordlessly request assistance.

·Thankfully Ratchet is just behind the group and, for their sake, knows what to do and moves quickly. You can just make out a familiar optic above you as the final rush to the medical bay proves to be your limit, and you apologetically give a claw a squeeze as you drift off. Whirl only hears the medic say something about how they've been trying to restore communication for this exact purpose, and how they have oxygen ready, and they just need to hook you up...

·The moment he hands you over and medical assistance is offered to him, he refuses with a nearly violent outburst, threatening to make things much worse if anything is done before you're stabilized. Ratchet scolds him for the attitude but otherwise doesn't flinch as he lays your tiny body on a berth and stabilizes you with much needed oxygen. In an almost anticlimactic ending to the whole affair, Whirl is assured you'll survive, and in the haze of the realization it's over he can't bring himself to feel anything at first.

·By the time you come to he's allowed the worst of his injuries to be repaired. Sitting beside your berth in silence, he perks up when he hears you stir, leaning over you to keep the medical lights from hurting your eyes. A tender claw brushes your cheek as he dryly jokes about you being more trouble than a fleshy could be worth, but you can see his spark isn't in it. The entirety of it all rushing back, you hold the tip of his claw in awe at what he's done for you, but also to comfort the fear you know is hurting him. It's almost heartbreaking; how quickly he confesses that this has shaken him to his core. You ask if he's having any second thoughts, and the question seems to act like a jumpstart to his very being. He's not, he firmly assures you, he's only forgotten what it felt like to have something to lose again. It hurts; but every single moment with you is worth that risk, he learned that the moment he fell in love with you. You're worth feeling pain again.

[starryeyes-darkestnights]

Wicked Game

Part 4 of We Dance Together Now

An O’Knutzy au where Leo and Logan are still playing for the Lions, but Finn is a musician/grad student they met by chance on a roadie to Montreal.

Here are the first few parts!

Part 1 - Jingle Bell Rock

Part 2 - This City

Part 3 - Shut Up and Drive

I also stuck this up on AO3, my username there is the same :)

I struggled a LOT with this chapter. I’m still not sure it’s done what I wanted it to do, but I hope it works. And I hope you like it :) 

I’m suuuuuper excited for the next one, I’ve had it half-written since I started this fic! 

These beautiful characters and their world belong to the incredible @lumosinlove

The songs referenced are My Shot, from Hamilton, and Wicked Game, which has several remixes that could work here, but I was listening to the Yola Recoba version, personally. 

---------------------------------------------------------------

Leo

“Thanks for helping today, Tremz.” Leo leaned against the entry wall and watched Logan slip on his shoes.

“No problem,” Logan looked up at him, his eyes sparkling mischievously, “You needed someone big and strong to carry your boxes up the stairs. Who am I to leave a damsel in distress?” He stood and flexed his biceps.

Leo rolled his eyes and shoved Logan toward the door. He could hear Finn laughing behind him. “Get out.”

Logan looked over his shoulder and grinned. “Your wish is my command, princess.” Leo moved to shove him again, but Logan snatched up his bag and ducked out the door before he could reach him. “You love me!” he yelled as he jogged down the hall. Leo just shook his head at the older boy’s antics and turned the lock behind him before flopping down on the couch with a tired groan.

The three of them had just finished setting up his new room. In Finn’s apartment. Where he lived now. With Finn. He was still wrapping his head around it. It was crazy to think he didn’t have to pack up his stuff and move somewhere else again next week; that he had blankets that hadn’t been slept on by a hundred people before him. Finn was a godsend of a human being.

He was also a walking tornado of a human being, and Leo’s current state of exhaustion was a result of today being a shining example of both of those traits.

Since he’d been living in hotels all year Leo didn’t own any furniture of his own, which meant he had spent his Friday morning going from store to store buying what he needed. Finn had volunteered to drive, and Logan had tagged along too. The two of them had also very kindly volunteered to spend their afternoon helping him build everything. It was very, very nice of them, and Leo had been incredibly grateful for their company, and for their help… at least until they actually started putting things together. It had been funny at first, watching Logan and Finn jump headlong in to building things without taking the time to read the instructions. But the resultant failures had meant that Leo had to unbuild everything they touched, actually read the instructions, and then give them explicit directions on how to put it back together properly. Instead of the few hours Leo had expected to spend on it, the whole thing had taken them until the late evening, and now Leo was exhausted and ready to relax.

He heard Finn wander into the living room after him, and his smiling face appeared over the back of the couch above him. “What’s up, Marigold?”

Leo closed his eyes, trying not to roll them as he let out an exasperated chuckle. “Finn. That is STILL a terrible nickname.”

“It is not.”

“Yes it is. ‘What’s up marigold’ makes no sense. ‘What’s up buttercup’ works because it rhymes.” He opened his eyes back up to emphasize his point. “Marigold does not rhyme. At all.”

Finn just shrugged, pushing himself back up to walk around the couch. “You should have thought of that before you accepted it in the first place.”

“I didn’t accept it! I just gave up trying to argue with you two and- ugh. Never mind.”

“That’s what I thought.” Finn grinned. “Plus, I googled marigolds after that night because I didn’t actually know what they were, and the name suits you.”

“What?” Leo looked at him, curious. “Why?”

Finn’s expression faltered for a second as he lifted Leo’s feet to sit on the other end of the couch. He put them back down in his lap, making Leo’s heart skip a beat. When he spoke again, his voice was a little softer. “Your hair shines like them, in the sun. Golden.”

Leo had to work to keep his face neutral. That was… sweet. And unexpected. Finn was always doing things he didn’t expect.

Before he could think of a response, Finn’s cocky grin was back in place. “Also, calling you marigold makes you grumpy, which, like, never happens, so I’m never giving it up.”

Leo didn’t even try to hide it this time as he rolled his eyes affectionately, lifting his legs and giving Finn a gentle kick with his socked feet. “Whatever,” he laughed. “I’m going to shower. Have you seen that duffel bag Logan brought in? It has all my comfortable clothes.”

Finn just pointed wordlessly to entryway where he and Logan had dumped a few of Leo’s bags, abandoning unpacking them in favour of wreaking utter havoc trying to build his bedroom furniture.

Leo wandered over and grabbed the Lions duffel off the floor, pausing as he lifted it. He didn’t’ remember it being this empty… he unzipped it, suspicious, and sure enough, he found Logan’s training gear inside.

He groaned. “Damn it.”

Finn looked over to him. “What’s wrong?”

“Logan took my bag. This is his stuff.”

“Oh. Shit.” He looked from the bag up to Leo, and then popped up from the couch. “No worries, I have a solution!” he called, jogging toward his bedroom.

Leo, curious yet again, gently put Logan’s bag back down and started to follow. As he reached the corner, Finn popped back out of his room with a pile of clothes in his hands, almost crashing into him as he gave a little squeak.

“Ahh! Oh my god, why are you right there!? You scared the shit out of me. Learn to make noise when you walk.”

Leo chuckled at that, a memory of Logan saying that exact phrase to him the first night they watched Finn play running through his mind. “You and Logan are scarily similar sometimes, you know that?”

“What?” A confused look crossed Finn’s face.

Leo just smiled, and Finn shook his head.

“You know what, never mind. I don’t think I want to know. Here.” He passed Leo a t-shirt and a pair of sweatpants. “You can sleep in these tonight and we’ll get your stuff from Logan tomorrow. They’re both pretty big on me so I’m hoping they’ll fit you properly.”

Leo, taken aback by the gesture, accepted the pile with a surprised but grateful smile. “Oh. Thank you, Finn. You didn’t have to do that.”

Finn shrugged, his wide brown eyes twinkling. “I know where you live. I’ll get them back.”

---

But as Leo pulled the shirt on after his shower, he decided that Finn was not, in fact, getting it back. It was soft. And it smelled like Finn. He breathed in deeply. It was silly, he knew, to cling to this little bit of him- to pretend it was Finn, instead of his clothes, that he was allowed to have. But he was doing it anyway. He could let himself have this little thing. He turned to look in the mirror and let out a surprised snort. “Of course.” He chuckled to himself.

He padded out to the living room, where Fin was still lying on the couch, a book in his hand.

“I thought you were joking about loving the Eagles.” He teased, his mouth quirking up on one side.

Finn sat up and looked over at him, a strange look crossing his face as he took in Leo’s appearance. It was gone before Leo could read into it, replaced with a dramatic showing of mock outrage.

“One does not joke about the Eagles, Leo!” He gestured down at the band logo stretched across Leo’s chest. “That logo is a badge of honour. Wear it with pride.”

Leo just shook his head, amused. “Aye, aye, captain.” He saluted Finn. “Thanks again. I’ll see you in the morning?”

Finn waved goodnight and Leo slipped back into his room, turning off the lights and smiling up at the city lights flickering across the ceiling. His ceiling, now. He chewed on his lip for a second, thinking, before getting back out of bed and walking softly to the living room.

Finn looked up at him when he entered, and whatever Leo had been about to say immediately caught in his throat. The warm lamplight was sending soft shadows across Finn’s features, making his freckles glow against the pale of his skin. He was curled into the corner of the couch, book in his hands and a blanket wrapped around him, and Leo wanted nothing more in that moment than to be there too, cuddled up beside this beautiful boy. His heart pulled in his chest.

He realized he was staring when Finn spoke up and broke the spell. “What’s up, Leo?” his smile was soft, gentle. “Do you need something? Can I get you anything?”

Leo straightened up at that, shaking his head. “No, no. I’m good. Thank you. And I’m sorry, I didn’t want to disturb you, and I won’t keep you, but I just wanted to say thank you. For having me here. You didn’t have to offer up your space, and I appreciate it. It really means a lot.”

Finn closed his book and leaned forward; his expression sincere as he locked eyes with Leo. “I’m just glad you’re happy. You deserve to have a home. I wouldn’t want you to be anywhere else.”

And when Leo went back to his room that night, he fell asleep quickly, breathing in the scent of Finn and, for the first time since he came to this city, finally feeling at home.

---

Finn

The next few months passed by quickly for Finn, everything blurring together in an exhausting but happy mess of work and play. He had thought it would be more of a learning curve, sharing his space with Leo after living alone for the past 4 years- and some days it was a bit weird, remembering that there was another person around and he couldn’t just play guitar at 2am, or work through melodies in the shower when Leo was sleeping- but he wouldn’t change it back for anything.

He’d always known he was insanely lucky to live in the apartment he did (his parents had bought it as an investment property when he first moved to Gryffindor- perks of their jobs in real estate). Very few college students had the privilege of even a single spare room, let alone two, and not worrying about needing roommates to pay rent had saved him from needing to share the space with strangers. But it had been lonely.

Now, when he was finished his long day on campus studying, or working on his music, he actually looked forward to going home- even if it was only to meet up with Leo and leave again. After that first celebration he had gone to with Leo and Logan, it had become routine for them to invite him to join them for any dinners or parties that weren’t team-exclusive. He went to every one that he could and had ended up making some pretty good friends in that crowd. In particular, him and Kasey’s girlfriend Natalie had struck up a fun friendship. She was also a musician, and the two of them had gotten together several times over the past few months just to play.

The boys had also asked him to let them know his gig schedule, and they had been there for every single show they weren’t working during. Finn liked having them there, knowing he would have their company as soon as he got off stage. They always had a drink waiting for him, and they usually found somewhere to go dance for the rest of the evening. Logan was always making fun of how Leo used to hate going out, but they danced together often now, and it was one of Finn’s favourite things.

Any nights they didn’t spend working, or with the team, or at one of Finns gigs, they usually spent together just the three of them, squeezed into a booth at Sid’s or lounging around the living room at Finn and Leo’s, playing video games and watching movies. Him and Leo had made the excellent discovery that Pixar movies almost always made Logan cry, though Logan denied it exceptionally violently every time they called him out. It was worth a pillow to the face to be able to tease him though.

Logan stayed over most of those evenings, in the spare room Finn had started thinking of as his. They’d built another bed for him and everything after Finn had woken up the first night he stayed over and seen how cramped he was on the couch. It wasn’t built for hockey players to sleep on and he didn’t like the idea of Logan being uncomfortable. He wanted everyone to feel at home in his place.

Some days it was just Finn and Leo at home, while Logan spent time with the Dumais family. Finn liked those days too. It was nice, hanging out with Leo one on one. The two of them often used the time to do chores, and he had been pleased to find out that they were much more enjoyable with Leo’s company. Grocery shopping with Leo was one of his favourites, riding the cart like a scooter up and down the aisles while Leo picked out everything they needed for dinner, and grabbing all the snacks that he knew Logan liked, so they could always be there when he came by. And he particularly enjoyed coming home and putting things away while Leo cooked, both of them singing along to the radio as the apartment filled with the smells of Leo’s southern recipes.

On quiet nights, he liked wandering into Leo’s room for company, the two of them laying next to each other on Leo’s giant bed and talking about books. One of the first nights he had done that, he had noticed his own t-shirt, the one he had lent Leo his first night, and that had curiously gone missing shortly after, hanging up on Leo’s closet door. Leo had been flustered, apologizing for snagging it from Finn’s clean laundry, and explaining that it was ‘just really comfortable’. Finn had tried very hard to hide the mini heart attack he was sure he was having at the idea of Leo choosing to wear his clothes, and he must have done an alright job of it because Leo continued to steal it often enough that it had just become another routine thing between them. Finn pretended to make fun of Leo for it, but he really liked it. He had taken to folding it and dropping it into Leo’s laundry basket when he wasn’t looking.

The addition of Leo’s warm presence, and of Logan’s fiery, mischievous energy, had made his big, cold apartment feel like home. There was always something happening, and it was never boring- sometimes to an extreme degree when Logan was around. Finn still had scars on his hand from Leo’s 19th birthday in February, when he had let Logan convince him that baking a cake wouldn’t be as difficult as it sounded (‘people do it all the time Finn, how hard can it possibly be?’). He had been wrong, as they discovered when he flipped what should have been a cooked cake upside down over the counter, and it turned out to be just a pan full of very hot batter that went all over Finn’s hands. It had stuck to him like very, very hot glue and the two of them had gone into full panic mode. Luckily, Leo had chosen that moment to come home from lunch with Remus, and he got everything under control. He had been exasperated, and quite concerned, but Finn liked to think he had appreciated their effort. Plus, Logan had felt guilty about it for weeks afterward, which Finn had initially felt bad about but then had started to take advantage of by (very dramatically) requesting him to do more and more ridiculous favours. Logan had stopped feeling guilty somewhere in between the request to build him an entire pillow fort (so he could heal in utmost comfort), and the request to do an interpretive dance to Ice, Ice, Baby (so he could feel like his burned hands were encased in ice).

When they were out of town for games, Finn missed having them around. Everything felt too… empty. But they were constantly in touch via their group chat, Leo sending videos of the cities they explored after games, and Logan sending pictures of Leo looking affectionately annoyed at Logan for dragging him out of the hotel to go and do said exploring. Those videos often included appearances from other Lions, usually making terrible 3 Musketeers jokes about them. On one memorable occasion, James had popped in to compare them to SpongeBob, Patrick, and Squidward. That one had positively delighted Finn, not least because Logan’s reaction to realizing he was the Squidward in that analogy had been gold. James had had to run.

Finn didn’t blame them for joking about it. He knew it was a bit strange, the way that they had become so inseparable, so fast. But he didn’t mind. When he looked at them in those videos—the wild in Logan’s eyes, the calm in Leo’s— he was reminded of how they pulled out the best of both those sides of his own personality. He never felt more like himself than he did with them. *

---

 Logan

One evening at the end of April, Logan sat sandwiched between Leo and Finn on their living room couch, a steering wheel in his hands. He was deeply focused on steering his car around a particularly dastardly curve when Finn jumped up, knocking Logan’s elbow and sending his character careening off a cliff as he screeched at the TV. “Cheating!! Leo! You’re cheating! Logan! He’s cheating!”

Logan, disgruntled now as he watched himself drop down to last place, just glared up at him. “You knocked me off a cliff. Don’t look at me for sympathy right now.”

Leo just continued playing calmly. “It’s not cheating Finn. I threw a banana at you. If you don’t want to get hit with bananas, don’t drive so close to me.”

“This is insane. Nobody is supposed to be this good at Mario Kart. It’s MARIO KART!” Finn flopped dramatically back down into his spot, groaning. “How have you won every single race?”

“I’m a man of many talents, Finn.”

“This is bullshit.”

Logan snorted, dropping his controller as he crossed the finish line in last place for the 4th time that night. “Says the guy who wins every single round of Halo.”

“Well, if you would stop and think before just picking the biggest bombs and sending your army running headfirst into every battle, maybe you too could win a strategy game.”

“Where’s the fun in that?”

“You are weirdly good at Halo, Finn.” Leo tossed out. “It’s kind of creepy watching the wheels turn in your head while you play.”

Logan watched, amused, as Finn gasped and glared at Leo in mock offense. “Well then. When the aliens finally invade here and you guys need a team leader to get you through the hordes and into a safe haven, you can find your own general. I’ll be over there helping people who DON’T call me creepy.”

It was Logan’s turn to be offended. “Hey! I didn’t call you creepy.”

Finn considered him for a moment. “Hmm. That’s true.”

He wrapped an arm around Logan’s neck and stuck his tongue out at Leo. “I’ll be over here keeping LOGAN alive, while you get your brains eaten.”

Logan tried to fight back the blush he could feel creeping up his cheeks as Finn’s arm pulled him in. Finn, Logan had discovered, was a very affectionate person, and while his comfort in sharing his personal space had grown on Logan and Leo as well—they were constantly in contact as they shoved together onto the couch—it  still made Logan’s pulse pick up every time he felt them close to him.

Leo snorted out a laugh at Finn’s threat as he put down his controller. “I’ll take my chances.” he replied as he stood and stretched, looking out the window at the setting sun. “It’s getting late. Anybody hungry?”

Logan’s stomach actually grumbled out loud at the mention of food.

“I’ll take that as a yes.” Leo laughed as he headed out of the living room.

Logan, somewhat reluctantly, pulled himself out of Finn’s hold and followed Leo into the kitchen, plunking himself down on one of the island barstools as Leo started pulling things out of the fridge. Finn disappeared into his room and came back to sit next to Logan a few seconds later, a book in his hand.

“You want to read?” He looked at Logan questioningly.

Logan just nodded at him as he spun around on his stool, slowly relaxing into his seat as the sound of Finn’s voice took over the kitchen, mingling with the sounds of Leo quietly chopping vegetables at the counter next to them.

A few weeks ago, when Leo and Finn were trying to pull him into an argument about book to movie adaptations, Logan had accidentally let it slip that he had never read The Hobbit. The two of them had been borderline offended, which Logan found hilarious, but it had then led to them asking him about other books, and Logan had been forced to admit that not only had he never read The Hobbit, but he had never read any book for fun.

It wasn’t something he liked to talk about, because he always worried it would make him look stupid, but he hated reading. Having to keep his focus on the page, keeping his hands still as they held the book… he just couldn’t handle it. When Leo and Finn had picked up on the fact that it was a sensitive topic, they had dropped it without asking him any more questions, which he had been grateful for. But the two of them still wanted to show him that stories could be fun outside of movie form, and when it became clear that there was no way in hell Logan was picking up a book himself, Finn had come up with a compromise: he would read a book to him. Logan hadn’t been convinced, but he appreciated the thought and figured he could just tune him out if he got bored, so he agreed.

So Finn had read the first chapter of The Hobbit to him and Leo while Leo cooked that night, and, to his surprise, Logan had found himself completely absorbed. It was kind of like listening to a podcast, but with Finn’s intoxicating voice playing all the parts.

It had become a routine after that—Finn reading to them as Leo cooked, and Leo reading to Finn and Logan as they cleaned up after. They always waited for him to read the next part, and it was one of his favourite parts of being at their apartment now. The combination of the sound of Finn’s voice and the smell of Leo’s cooking, made him feel safe.

That evening, Logan was the first to finish eating, and he leaned his chair back away from the table with a satisfied sigh, reaching over to ruffle Leo’s hair from where he was sitting next to him. “Fuck, Knutty, that was amazing. As always.”

Leo smiled back at him, blonde curls now falling over his eyes in a way that was absolutely not adorable. “Thanks, Tremz. I’m glad you guys liked it.”

Finn made a noise at that. “Liked it? Leo, I have genuinely never eaten better in my entire life than I have since you moved in here.”

Well. That provided Logan an excellent segue into his mission for the evening. He let his chair fall back down and folded his hands on the table in front of him. “If that is true, Finn, then I think that you should do something to pay him back.”

Finn looked up from his plate with a mouth full of pasta, brown eyes narrowing suspiciously as he looked between Logan and an amused looking Leo, who had immediately caught on to what Logan was doing. “Oh?”

“Yes. We have a game next Friday, and you’re invited to come. I think that should suffice as payment.”

“Oohh.” Finn plastered on a very fake smile. “That sounds very… interesting. Let me check my schedule and see what I have going on.”

Logan rolled his eyes at Finn’s feigned interest. He had turned down their offers to come to games repeatedly since they had met.  

“We have your schedule, idiote. We know you don’t have a show OR an exam. And—” Logan decided to move to his next tactic: guilt, “—you have to come this time. It’s a deciding game for the play-offs. If we lose, you won’t be able to watch us play again until next season.”

“I see.” Finn didn’t look convinced.

“Finn!” Logan tossed his balled-up napkin at him, making him laugh. “You are possibly the only person in this city who would turn down offers to come watch NHL games for free. From the box! MULTIPLE TIMES!”

“I cannot possibly be the only person in this entire city who doesn’t follow hockey.”

When neither Leo nor Logan bothered to respond to that, just continuing to look at him, Finn’s grin fell. He looked uncertain now, and his face turned serious as he looked each of them in the eye. “But… you guys know I support you, right? I follow all your scores and your… game… time, point, things, or whatever online. I even bought a hoodie!”

That was true and it had almost killed Logan the first time he had seen Finn in Lion’s colours. It still made his heart beat faster every time he thought of it. Which wasn’t helping him at the present moment.

Finn sighed. “I just think it’s a waste of a ticket for me to go when I have no idea what is happening. I don’t want to embarrass you guys”

Leo interjected then, pointing his fork at Finn. “First of all, you are never embarrassing. Well, usually not – “

“Fair.” Finn admitted.

Leo shot him a look. “—and not about this, for sure. And second, it’s not a waste of a ticket. We all get to invite our family and friends and stuff this game, and neither Logan’s family nor mine are able to make it. And all of our other friends are either on the team or related to them. So, if you don’t use the ticket, nobody will. Plus,” he set his fork down, his voice gentle, “we want you to come.”

Finn’s face softened, and Logan decided now was time to pull out his Hail Mary. “Also,” he waited until Finn looked over to him, “Natalie’s going to be there. And she already asked us if you were going to come this time.”

He bit back a triumphant smirk as Finn perked up at that. He knew they had him now. Finn and Natalie had hit it off really well the moment they met. So well in fact, that he had almost been jealous. But he wasn’t jealous. Because he had nothing to be jealous of. Finn was just a friend. A friend who was currently living rent-free in his mind wearing that goddamn Lions hoodie, but a friend nonetheless.

Finn pushed his empty plate to the middle of the table. “Well.” His eyes sparkled as he folded his arms and looked between them. “You should have led with that.”

---

Finn

One week later, Finn stood against the glass in the team box, cursing himself for agreeing to come to this game. He had never been more stressed in his life, every muscle in his body tense as he watched the puck bounce from player to player in front of Leo’s net. He had a brand-new respect for Leo’s unflappable demeanour. There was no way he could handle being the last stop between the other team and a goal- he was almost having a nervous breakdown just watching. But Leo was in his element: calm, controlled, moving fluidly around his net and mirroring the puck effortlessly. Finn had never seen someone so focused, so intent. When the other team finally took their shot and Leo snatched it out of the air, Finn let out a relieved breath. His heart was going a million miles a minute, just like it had been for the last hour that the game had been tied 1-1. “Oh my god,” he murmured, dropping his face into his hands. “This is so stressful. How do you guys watch this all the time?”

Natalie laughed next to him. “It can be pretty crazy.”

“You look perfectly relaxed.” Finn replied grumpily. It was true. She was much calmer than he was.

“I’m not as calm on the inside. But I have faith in these guys. I know they can win this.” She paused for a second. “It also helps that Kase is benched for this game with his leg. I’m a wreck when he’s in net during important games. Thank God for Leo Knut.”

“Thank God for Leo Knut?” Finn muttered reproachfully in response. His attention was pulled back to the ice as the puck was dropped again, still in their end. “Thank God for Leo Knut my ass, Leo Knut is the reason I might be seeing God soon. I’m going to have a fucking heart attACK! AH!” He shrieked the end of his sentence as one of the Ravenclaw players crashed into Leo, knocking him backwards into a goal post in a way that looked dangerous. His stomach dropped as Leo went down. He shot a panicked look at Natalie. “What the fuck! That can’t be allowed! Is that allowed?!?” He didn’t wait for an answer before looking up at the giant screens above the ice, currently zoomed in on Leo’s determinedly blank face as he slowly pulled his knees back underneath him. He was definitely going to give him a heart attack.

“No.” Natalie looked unhappy. “No, it’s not allowed. But he’s ok, Finn.”

He’s ok. Finn let out a shaky breath. He looked back down to the ice and was watching Leo stand up and reach for a water bottle when, all of a sudden, the crowd started to yell. Confused, he looked back up at the screens. Instead of Leo, there was now a close-up view of Logan, currently with one fist wrapped around the jersey of the player who had slammed into Leo, the other throwing punches.

Finn’s jaw dropped, his heart jumping up to meet it. Logan’s face was fierce. Angry. That energy that always seemed to be coiled around him, simmering just below the surface, was out in full force. His restraints were gone, and holy shit it was beautiful. Seeing those impossibly green eyes flashing dark with passion… it was lighting something on fire inside of Finn.

The other player was half a foot taller than Logan, but Lo had him down on the ice in seconds, spitting angry words in his face as the referees pulled him away. Finn watched Logan skate to the penalty box, swallowing hard as he took in the way his chest was heaving under his jersey. Holy. Fuck.

He felt heat creeping up his neck, and knew his face was going to turn bright red and give him away if he didn’t distract himself immediately. So he forced his attention back down to where the rest of the team was checking on Leo.

Leo. Logan had unleashed in defense of Leo.

Finn felt the now-familiar twist in his chest that sometimes accompanied seeing the two of them together. The feeling that there was something more between them than they were willing to admit.

Thankfully, Natalie mistook the look on his face for concern, and put a hand on his shoulder reassuringly. “It’s fine Finn, Logan fights all the time. He’s not hurt, he’ll be back on the ice in time to play the last three minutes. And Leo’s already ready to keep playing”

Finn just groaned and dropped his face into his hands. “I am never watching another hockey game again.”

It was supposed to be a joke, but five minutes later Finn watched Logan jump out of the penalty box and take off across the ice, dancing between the other players as he stole the puck and shot toward the net with a searing purpose. And when the goal alarm went off and the entire arena jumped to their feet to celebrate- when Logan was tackled by his teammates, and Leo was skating celebratory circles around his net, and Finn could see the smiles radiating off both of them from where he stood- Finn realized that if he ever wanted to be able to keep his friendships with these boys, it had to be true. Because if he ever watched them play another hockey game again, he would fall in love.

---

“O’Hara, think fast!”

Finn barely had time to register the beer being thrown his way before Leo reached out and snatched it out of the air in front of his chest. “Bliz, how many times do we have to tell you to not throw solid objects at people. Not everybody has your reflexes.”

But Kasey wasn’t listening, already turned around to head back into the living room of Sirius’ house, where they had all convened to celebrate their win. Finn had been grateful for the location- he didn’t think he could handle watching Leo and Logan getting hit on at a club all night tonight. He was still on edge.

Leo rolled his eyes at Kasey’s retreating back and handed the drink to Finn. “I’d wait a second to open that. Sorry, he does this all the time. We’ve had more than one black eye on the team from a drunken Kasey drink bomb.”

Finn chuckled. “No worries. Thanks for the save.”

Leo brightened adorably. “It’s my job!”

“And you are absolutely INCREDIBLE at it my friend!” A pair of arms wrapped around Leo’s neck from behind and a slightly buzzed and very excited James appeared over his shoulder. “MVP of the game, my man! You killed it! We’re going to the play-offs, baby!”

He whooped as he ruffled Leo’s golden hair, still slightly damp from his post-game shower. Leo’s cheeks flushed a deep red as he accepted James’ fist bump. “I just played. Thank you though.”

“And he’s humble too! How are you still single dude? Someone should have scooped you up ages ago.”

Leo’s cheeks somehow turned even deeper red as he shot a quick look up at Finn, and Finn heard Lily’s amused voice as she slid in from behind them, wrapping an arm around James’ waist and pulling him off of Leo. “Leave the poor guy alone James. He just wants to celebrate in peace.”

Leo smiled gratefully at Lily, looking relieved when Kasey and Natalie returned to the kitchen, Talker in tow. Leo jumped into their conversation as the group of them settled in around the room, talking and laughing above the music playing from the built-in speakers. Finn held back for a moment, taking the opportunity to scan the living room from where him and Leo were leaning against the kitchen island. He caught a glimpse of familiar dark curls under a snapback, and Logan’s eyes met his from across the room. Logan grinned, excusing himself from a conversation with Remus and heading towards them.

“Hey,” Logan’s breath was warm on Finn’s cheek as he leaned in to be heard over the voices in the room. “How did you like the game?”

Finn fought to keep his heart from beating out of his chest. He was still reeling from his decidedly unwelcome epiphany earlier that evening, and it was going to be a long night if he couldn’t get a handle on himself soon. He cleared his throat, looking straight ahead instead of turning to meet Logan’s gaze. “It was the most stressful few hours of my entire life. I’m never doing it again.” He winced at the way his voice cracked. Traitorous voice box. “And for the record, you are NOT a ‘perfectly reasonable player’.”

Logan tilted his head back and laughed openly at that. Finn let himself look then. Despite everything, it was nice to see him so relaxed and happy.

“Well, I’m glad you at least came to this one. Even if you judge me.”

He leaned back next to Finn, shoulders brushing, and Finn watched as he scanned the room. A moment later, a glint appeared in shorter boy’s eye, his smile turning mischievous. Finn turned to follow his gaze, looking for what had prompted the change. He caught sight of James, still in his game jersey, and Lily, laughingly trying her best to get him to take it off.

He heard Logan call out to them. “Hey Pots! Did you hear your jerseys are only the third most popular on the Lion’s shop now?”

James froze, turning to them with his eyes wide. “What?”

He rounded on Logan. “Who told you that? Who beat me?” His expression turned to outrage. “Who could possibly have beaten me?!”

Finn held back a laugh at James reaction, letting out a loud cough instead. One that sounded very suspiciously like the word ‘bullshit’. He heard Leo do the exact same beside him and turned to catch his eye with a grin and a high-five. The two of them had made a game over the past few months of seeing who could catch Logan the fastest when he started his game of poking the bear- something that was hilarious to them and endlessly irritating to Logan.

Right on cue, Logan let out an exasperated noise. “Guys! You are no fun! Stop doing that!”

James’ head twisted back and forth between Logan and Finn as he pieced it together. “Wait… what??” He gasped at Logan, looking betrayed. “Tremz! Did you make that up? How could you! You almost gave me a heart attack on this glorious evening!”

Logan shot a mock glare at Leo and Finn, but his face cracked into a grin when he turned back to James. “You should have seen your face.”

James looked like he was about to respond, but at just that moment, a familiar beat started to play over the speakers. Someone in the living room cheered and turned up the volume, and James whooped, throwing his hands in the air. Finn smirked as he followed suit, pushing away from the counter to join him in the middle of the room.

---

Logan

Logan frowned when Finn stepped away from him- he liked feeling his warmth against his side. He watched as Finn moved after James, turning to look back at Logan and grinning as he sang along to the lyrics of the song now playing loudly through the house. Logan loved Finn’s singing voice. He smiled back and was about to go join him when something weird caught his attention, making him do a double take.

It wasn’t unusual for Finn to jump into the middle of a room to give a performance of a song. He did it all the time. At home, at the club, at parties. It was quintessential Finn behaviour.

But now, the entire rest of the room was joining him. Every single one of his friends had abandoned their conversations to chant along with the opening lyrics of this song Logan had never heard before. Logan’s brow furrowed in confusion as he spun around to look behind him. The living room was the same, everyone starting to move away from the walls and stand from the couches. Only Leo had stayed where he was, a few feet away from Logan.

“What the hell?” He muttered.

He turned back around to question Finn, only to find him no longer looking his way. Instead, he was now face to face with Talker in the middle of the room, the two of them rapping dramatically to one another. Logan lifted an eyebrow, letting out a short, surprised laugh as he watched the two of them.

             “I’ma get a scholarship to King’s College,

             I probably shouldn’t brag,

But dag, I amaze and astonish”

The rest of the room was still singing along. It was beyond weird. “What. The fuck. Is happening?” Logan asked nobody in particular.  

The rhythm of the song slowed a bit, and Finn turned back toward Leo and Logan, sliding smoothly over in front of them. His brown eyes sparkled as his gaze locked with Logan’s, singing directly to him.

             “I’m a diamond in the rough, a shiny piece of coal

             Tryin’ to reach my goal, my power of speech, unimpeachable”

Logan leaned closer to Leo, his only ally in this insanity, but Finn had pointed dramatically to the younger boy and Leo laughed, stepping away from the counter and picking up the lyrics from the next line, pointing at himself as he sang:

             “Only nineteen but my mind is older

             These New York City streets get colder, I shoulder

             Every burden, every disadvantage I have learned to manage…”

Logan shot a surprised glare at Leo. Traitor. And now Finn was singing along again, and both of them were pointing at him, waiting for him to pick up the next line but Logan truly, truly had no idea what this was.

Finn looked at him with mock outrage when he realized Logan wasn’t faking his ignorance, straightening his back as he lifted his hands in a very ‘what the heck?’ sort of gesture.

Logan started to roll his eyes, but then all of a sudden, the beat changed again, and Finn’s hands were by his head and he was walking backward, winding his hips in a way that Logan had never seen him move before. A way that should be illegal.

His eyes were still locked on Logan’s, but where they had been filled with humour a moment ago, now they were burning with something intense that was sending Logan into a complete tailspin.

             “I am the AL-EX-AN-D-ER, we are, meant to be.”

His emotions were already running high after their win, and now Finn was standing in front of him, moving like that, looking at him like that. He heard himself let out a shaky breath and snapped his jaw shut, swallowing hard and jerking his eyes away from Finn, desperate for something else to focus on. His gaze landed on Leo, right next to him, which was not better.

Leo. He could see his toned chest through the fitted t-shirt he was wearing, and he wanted to reach out and touch. Fuck.

He could feel all the walls he had built up over the past four months crumbling down around him, and he started to panic. He was supposed to be getting over his feelings for Leo. Not growing them. Not adding Finn into the mix.

His breathing sped up. How was he this gone, for both of them? Was that even possible??

Pull it together Tremblay. He tried to talk himself down. Leo was his teammate. They were both his friends- friends like he had never had before. Those walls were there for a good fucking reason. He didn’t want to risk them.

He took a deep breath in through his nose, straightening his spine and pushing his shoulders back. He could do this. He looked back up and watched as Finn crooked a finger at him, calling him in to dance with them. The same way they always did when they were out together. His face was open and happy again. He just looked like normal Finn now. This was familiar. He could do this. The song kept playing.

             “Hey yo I’m just like my country

             I’m young, scrappy and hungry

             And I’m not throwing away my, shot!”

He took one step closer, and… nope. It would appear he could not, in fact, do this. He couldn’t handle familiar right now. He was buzzed, and high on adrenaline from the game, and this song was in his bones and if he was going to get himself out of this spiral, he needed to be away from the boys that were causing it.

He shook his head at Finn and forced a tight smile, watching him shrug his acceptance and turn to James instead. Logan turned to head over to where Sirius was stood in the corner of the living room, the only other person who looked as bewildered as he was by the scene. He had barely taken a step before a long arm wrapped around his shoulders from behind, pulling in him close to the strong chest he was trying to run away from. He closed his eyes, feeling his body tense as Leo’s low voice sounded in his ear, his skin warm against Logan’s own. He didn’t know whether to laugh or cry as Leo sang, off-key as usual, in some sort of horrible French accent.

             “I dream of life without a monarchy

             The unrest in France will lead to ‘onarchy?

             Onarchy? How you say, how you, oh, anarchy?

             When I fight I make the other side panicky with my, shot!”

It was hilarious, but feeling Leo this close to him right now, in this moment, was overload. It took everything he had to pull out of Leo’s grasp, grabbing his wrist and spinning underneath him. He stood on his tiptoes to let Leo spin too, and then gently shoved him back toward Finn. He knew Leo would assume he was following, so he turned back to the living room and slid into place next to Sirius.

He stood there, watching Nado and Kuny—how the hell did even Kuny know this song??—singing drunkenly on top of the couch, and tried to will his heart into submission.

After a few moments, Sirius’ voice sounded next to him. “Do you have any idea what this is?”

Logan shook his head, glancing over. “Non. But apparently we should be looking into it.”

Sirius just nodded, looking at him. Logan liked this about Sirius. He was quiet, and he didn’t mind if people were quiet around him. He always seemed to know when Logan needed a minute. He guessed that’s what made him a good captain. Logan felt calmer just being beside him. The two of them stood together in silence for a few minutes, until the whole house broke out into a chorus of ‘whoa’’s, and Sirius glanced over at him again. “You ok?”

“I’ll be better once this fucking song ends. How long is this thing?”

Sirius laughed at that, agreeing, and Logan felt his confidence coming back. He felt safer there, in the corner, watching Finn and Leo from afar. The distance had at least allowed his heart to stop pinging around his chest like a goddamn pinball machine. He was feeling, if not completely back in control, at least much more so than before.

“I’m good, Cap.” He meant it.

Sirius’ eyes were on his. “Ok. You know I’m here though, if you need me.”

“I know.” He shot Sirius a grateful smile. “Thanks, Sirius. Really.”

Sirius nodded, turning away as the song finally ended. Someone switched over to a dance playlist, and the living room turned into a de facto dance floor. Logan and Sirius stayed where they were for another song, until everyone else seemed to be either dancing, or involved in a game of what looked like Spoons at the dining room table. Logan drained the last of his rum and coke and turned to Sirius as he pushed off the wall toward the now empty kitchen. “I’m going to get another drink. You want anything?”

“No thanks. I’m good.” Sirius responded quietly, his expression soft. Logan followed his gaze over to where Loops was dancing with Lily and smiled. He clapped Sirius on the shoulder. “Ok, Cap. Have fun.”

---

A few shots and nearly an hour later, Logan was feeling as close to normal as he figured he would be able to pull off that night, teaching the Hoedown Throwdown choreography to a very enthusiastic Leo and Finn as someone’s country playlist blasted through the house. The team’s excitement for their freshly earned play-off spot had rubbed off on him again over the past hour, and he was enjoying himself, even if he was still a bit on edge.

It only took a few songs for them to ace the dance, and after they killed it to some song about chicken and tractors that Finn had sang every single word to, there was a break in the music while Nat and Talker argued over who got to choose next. They took the opportunity to their breath.

“Well, since we’re waiting anyway, I’m going to go grab another drink.” Finn swiped a hand through his sweat-tousled hair and looked between Logan and Leo. “Do you want anything?”

Leo shook his head, eyes bright against his dance-flushed cheeks. “No thanks. I think I’m done drinking for the night. We have a team meeting early tomorrow I don’t want to be hungover for.”

Logan still had half a drink in his hand, so Finn took off to the kitchen and left the two of them to  discuss who they could drag into their next dance, which Finn had decided for reasons Logan didn’t understand, to try and learn as a square instead of a triangle.

A new song finally started to play as they scanned the room, and as the beat came across the speakers, Logan recognized it with a frustrated groan.

Wicked Games. One of the few songs that he used to have multiple versions of on his playlist. A song that he had had to take off said playlist, because it got him in his head about Finn and Leo.

Of course someone would put this song on right when he had gotten his shit back together. Of fucking course.

He took a long drink from his glass and looked up at Leo, who was still looking around the room for participants. He watched as the colour-changing living room lighting lit up the taller boy’s face: blue, then green, then orange.

“The world was on fire, and no one could save me but you”

Leo glanced over at him, and then did a double take, turning to fully face him. He scanned Logan’s face, eyebrows furrowing as concern flashed through his warm blue eyes. Logan sighed through his nose. Fucking Knutty. He always knew.

“And I never dreamed that I’d meet somebody like you”

When Logan didn’t make a move to explain anything, Leo just nodded and took a step back.

“You know what?” he started. “Let’s just do it as three. Finn’ll get over it. I don’t want to dance with anyone else right now.”

Logan knew Leo was only saying it for his sake. But he couldn’t be bothered to try and pretend he was down for an audience right now, so he just nodded and stepped into what would be his place in the triangle when Finn came back. Leo turned to assess the space around them, and Logan let himself watch again. He never got sick of looking at Leo. Kind, thoughtful, annoyingly perceptive, beautiful Leo. The lyrics of the song repeated, over and over.

             “No I, don’t wanna fall in love, with you.”

“I think we’re going to need more room. Or someone’s going to get hurt.” Leo mused as he looked at the floor around them, trying to work out the logistics of the coordinated drunk jumping that was going to happen. One of his curls fell over his eyes. Logan resisted the urge to reach up and move it away.

             “What a wicked game you play, to make me feel this way

What a wicked thing to do, to make me dream of you”

Logan’s chest twisted and he pulled his gaze away. Fuck this song. He was going to kill Talkie for this. He could feel himself taking a nose-dive back to where he had been earlier that evening. Why couldn’t he shake these feelings tonight? He could always shake them. He was a master at shaking off feelings. This was ridiculous.

He decided to look for something they could push out of the way for more space, to give himself something to focus on. That was a task he could do.

But before he could move, a pair of arms wrapped around his shoulders from behind, the weight of a full-grown hockey player landing on his back and making him stumble forward. Pots’ voice was teasing in his ear. “Wicked Game is right, hey Tremzy??”

Logan’s breath caught in his throat as he froze in place, half bent over trying to regain his balance. Had Pots noticed? Was he being obvious?

“W-what?” he choked out.

James pulled him up and spun around him until they were face to face, his grin lopsided and his eyes a little glazed from the drinks he had clearly been celebrating with. “Wicked Game! Because you played a wicked game! Get it!? You got us the game winner, Tremz.” He looked wobbly on his feet, smiling dreamily. “You got us to the playoffs.”

Relief flooded Logan’s system. He hadn’t noticed. Nobody noticed. It was fine.

It didn’t feel fine.

“Oh. Ya, I guess.” He forced a little laugh.

“Come, my baby Canadian.” James bowed toward him, extending a hand. “I owe you this dance for getting me one step closer to my baby bathing in the cup.”

“Shut up, Pots.” Logan turned as an annoyed voice sounded behind them. Sirius, the inventor of superstition himself, walked by and smacked James gently upside the head. “Knock on wood. Now.”

“Ow,” James grumbled, rubbing his head and knocking on the doorframe he watched Sirius walk through, “how does he do that? It’s like he has a seventh sense for bad luck.”

Logan prayed James would follow Sirius away. But instead he just grinned and shoved Logan toward the center of the dance floor.

Logan did not want to be there anymore. James had freaked him out, and the stupid song was still playing. For the second time that night he wished he knew where the fucking skip button was located in this ridiculously oversized house.

Logan grabbed James’ arm and pulled him to a stop, leaning into him to prevent him going further. He turned on his best fake smile. “Hey Pots. I know I got the goal, but do you know who you really owe this dance to?”

James looked at him suspiciously. “Who?”

“Leo. We wouldn’t have won without his unreal performance tonight. You should get him first.”

James gasped. “You are right, Tremblay. Ok. I will get him first. But I will be back for you! Don’t move!”

Logan watched James wobble backward across the living room, shooting finger guns back at Logan until he crashed into a very amused-looking Leo.

When Logan figured the two of them were engaged enough to not notice him leaving, he slipped off in search of a quiet place to hang out for a while. He found a dark hallway off the end of the dining room and slid down to sit on the hardwood floor. His hands were shaking again as he pulled out his phone and opened the group chat he had with his sisters.  

He missed his sisters. He hadn’t told them about his feelings for either of the boys—for any boy, really—but he knew that if he messaged them, they would talk him down without prying. And that was what he wanted right now. He shot off a simple, ‘you guys awake?’ message, and waited for the reply.

---

Leo

Leo was wandering around the main floor of Sirius’ house, looking for Logan. He was worried about him. Logan had been on edge all night, keeping his distance and forcing smiles that didn’t reach his eyes. Leo could tell he was trying to hide something, and after catching the way he had looked at Finn in the kitchen earlier, it wasn’t hard to guess what that something was.

He had been watching Logan and Finn dance around each other, figuratively and literally, for months now. It was hard, watching these boys—these boys that made him ache with how each of them had burrowed their way into his soul—watch each other. It made him feel like he was drowning.

He had told himself when he came to Gryffindor that he was here for hockey, that he wasn’t going to get involved with anyone. Get attached to anyone. But here he was, the world’s biggest idiot, falling head over heels for not one, but two of the literal worst possible people to fall for. His home roommate and his travel roommate. Both, to the best of his knowledge, very closeted. Both very interested in someone else. Both very interested in each other. It was a bit of a disaster.

But disaster or not, Leo wasn’t going to let Logan feel like he was alone tonight. He knew firsthand how much support from the people who love you mattered, even if you weren’t ready to talk about it yet.

He poked his head into the kitchen and found Finn, looking deep in conversation with Natalie, but Logan wasn’t with him. He was a bit concerned about Finn, too. He also seemed a bit off this evening, and he never had come back from his last drink break. But Finn was safe with Natalie for now, so Logan was his priority for the moment.

He checked a few more rooms before he caught a glimpse of Logan’s ever-present snapback out of the corner of his eye. He was sitting on the floor in the dark end of an empty hallway, the glow from his phone screen lighting up his face.

Leo moved cautiously toward him, and when he didn’t look up, slid to the floor to sit next to him.

“Hey.” He offered softly.

Logan looked up at him with a small, fleeting smile, his usually bright green eyes looking tired. “Hey.”

Leo scanned his face, trying to decide whether Logan wanted to talk. “What are you up to?”

“Just texting my sisters.”

Leo nodded, understanding, and looked away, giving Logan the chance to go back to his phone if he wanted to. Logan looked back down at the screen and typed out a final message before clicking the screen off and shoving it back in his pocket.

They sat quietly next to each other for a few minutes, just listening to the music. After a while, Logan broke the silence.

“It’s crazy that we’re heading to the playoffs.” He said quietly.

That made Leo smile a bit. He looked back over at Logan. “You played incredible tonight.” He said sincerely. “All season, really. I think we earned it.”

Logan’s lips quirked up a bit at the compliment. “Thanks, Nutty. We really did.”

They fell back into their comfortable silence, sitting shoulder to shoulder and watching what they could see of the dining room down the hall. In the lights of the party, Pots and Sirius were teasing Remus about something they couldn’t hear. Remus blushed a deep red and Sirius laughed as he pulled him in for a kiss.

“We’re really lucky.” Leo said, hoping that Logan knew he wasn’t just talking about the game anymore. When Logan didn’t respond, he looked over to see him pulling at the seams of his jeans, looking like he might be on the verge of tears. The sight pulled at Leo’s chest. He wanted to take Logan’s face in his hands and wipe away that look forever.

But he knew that wasn’t what Logan wanted. So instead he stood, holding out a hand to the shorter boy. He would be here for him in whatever way Logan needed. “You wanna get another drink? Or are you ready to head out?”

Logan looked up at him with reddened eyes, and Leo’s heart felt like it was breaking with every beat. And when Logan put his hand in his and the sparks flooded over his whole body, Leo closed his eyes and willed them away.

---

[whitesparrows97]

Heartstring Melodies – Part 9 (final)

Pairing: Min Yoongi x Reader (feat. Jeon Jungkook x Reader)

Genre: Soulmate AU, College AU, fuckboy!Yoongi

Summary: Min Yoongi, the fuckboy of the whole college and the guy all girls fall for, should be your soulmate? You don’t believe that, you don’t want to believe that. Therefore, you and your best friend make a pact: She pretends to be you and gets together with Yoongi. Nothing can go wrong with that, right?

Warnings: Fluff, explicit sexual content including oral (female receiving), fingering, handjobs, first time sex, swearing while having sex

Word Count: 7K

Previous

Chapter nine: «Forever is composed of nows.» – e.d.

The next weeks you were happier than probably ever before in your life. It was almost cheesy to have the thought alone, but it was true for you. Everything went more than great between you and Yoongi. You gave each other the space you both needed and at the same time were happy about every second you spent together. After the problems with Yoongi had been solved, you finally had time and a clear head for your neglected studies again. You and Jin made good progress with the lab tasks and the first round of exams was done as well. You had been a bit cautious at first (and to be honest, you still were) when you got back in touch with Liv. You were glad that she finally realized that your plan didn’t work out. However, you were a bit suspicious if it was a good idea to let her back into your life if she had been so obsessed with Yoongi at one point. That’s why you were currently satisfied with the couple of messages you sent each other every few days. Everything else would be seen in the future. 

The only thing that still caused you some concern was when your thoughts drifted to Jungkook. You felt remorse that would probably never completely go away. But not only towards him, but also towards Yoongi. He tried to hide it from you, but you knew that he was also burdened by Jungkook’s extreme withdrawal from him. And you both knew it was your fault. At least, thanks to Hoseok, Yoongi got regular updates on how the younger one was doing. But that wasn’t the same as sitting across from each other and talking, of course. It was especially difficult when the group of friends had planned an evening together. Most of the time, Yoongi would cancel to make it easier for Jungkook. By doing so, he had distanced himself not only from Jungkook, but from the entire group. To see him like that made you sad and was the small drop of bitterness that dulled your happiness a bit. 

That’s why you were more than surprised when you received a text from Jungkook a good two months later. You were in Yoongi’s apartment, which had become more or less your second home during the last weeks. The two of you were lying on the couch, an episode of your current favorite show was playing on the TV in front of you when your phone suddenly lit up. You groaned as you sat up to grab it from the coffee table. You had to squeeze your eyes slightly as you tried to get your eyes used to your bright display in the dark room and see who was texting you. Then you almost dropped the phone out of your hand in surprise. 

“It’s Jungkook,” you heard yourself say, and Yoongi also straightened up a little next to you. 

“What’s he saying?” 

Your eyes quickly glanced over the few lines of text and with each additional word your eyes widened a little more. “He wants to meet us,” you said after a few seconds when your brain had processed the information. 

“Us?” Yoongi asked and you nodded as you read Jungkook’s message over and over again, fearing that you had interpreted the meaning wrong. But the text was clear. 

“He explicitly says both of us.” You turned your head and looked at Yoongi, who gave you a cautious smile. 

“Maybe everything can really work out between us.”

“Did Hoseok say anything, did he hint at anything?”

Yoongi shook his head. “Not at all, but I’ll ask him again. But he would have told me if there was anything new.”

“Hmm,” you just said, putting your phone aside and letting yourself fall back against Yoongi’s chest. Immediately he wrapped his hands around your waist and, deep in thought, played with the cord of your hoodie. “I’m really curious what he wants to tell us. Especially to both of us.”

“Maybe he just wants to wish us all the best,” Yoongi thought, “We haven’t talked to each other in over two months.”

“That was really unfair of him,” you sighed, “You had nothing to do with my stupid behavior. He can be as angry with me as he wants. But you are one of his best friends.”

“Don’t be so hard on yourself,” Yoongi said and gave you a short kiss on the temple. “But I can understand him. Let’s not worry too much about that. Let’s just wait and see what he has to tell us.”

A few days later you were on your way to the café Jungkook had suggested. You were rarely in this part of the city and it was also quite far from Jungkook’s apartment, which surprised you. Your hands were sweating with excitement and Yoongi, who noticed your nervousness, squeezed your hand once. 

“Don’t worry so much, baby,” he said encouragingly and stroked the back of your hand with his thumb to underline his statement. He pushed the door open with his free hand and immediately the soft music and the warmth of the café came out to you. 

“What if he only wants to blame us?” you quietly replied, for fear Jungkook would somehow hear you. Even though you hadn’t seen him yet and didn’t know if he was even there yet. 

“Have you ever seen him angry?” Yoongi joked and also kept an eye out for the younger one. “I don’t think he’s capable of that.” He raised his hand in greeting and you followed his gaze. In the farthest corner of the cafe, Jungkook sat alone at a table for four people. He had looked up from the menu and waved back at you. 

Should you let go of Yoongi’s hand? Was it weird for him to see you and Yoongi together?

You looked at Yoongi and just saw the corners of his mouth twitching upwards before he slowly let his hand slip out of yours. He gave you a quick sideways glance and once again you were amazed at how well he seemed to know you. But that was probably the benefit of having a soulmate…

“Hi, Jungkook,” Yoongi greeted him and let himself fall on a chair opposite him. Quickly you followed him and took the seat next to him. “It’s good to finally see you again.”

Jungkook’s gaze was fixed on you but you were glad that you didn’t see any reluctance in it, as you had feared at first. When he realized that you had noticed his gaze, he quickly looked up at the tabletop and rubbed his neck almost embarrassed. “I know, I’m sorry I just disappeared like that.”

“You don’t have to apologize for anything,” you clarified immediately and Jungkook threw a grateful smile at you. 

“Nevertheless I could have contacted you. Especially you, Yoongi-Hyung.”

“Don’t worry about that, Jungkookie. You needed your time and that’s completely understandable,” Yoongi also reassured him. 

For a moment, it was quiet between you, only the soft atmospheric music filled the café. There was hardly anyone else there except you, and you only heard a soft laugh and muffled voices in the distance. Your fingers twitched and wanted to grab Yoongi’s hand, which practically served as an anchor when you got nervous. But you kept yourself from doing so. As relaxed as Jungkook seemed, you didn’t have to rub it in his face how happy you and Yoongi were. By looking closely at Jungkook’s face, you realized how much he had changed. The insecurity that you had seen so often in his eyes had completely disappeared. His eyes were beaming and a constant little smile was playing around his lips as if he had just thought of a funny situation from the past. He was about to start talking when suddenly the waitress stood behind him.

“Have you decided yet?” She asked with a warm smile. Her eyes remained on you a little too long, but you ignored it and ordered a hot chocolate. Even if it wasn’t quite the right time of year for it, you could always drink one. Especially now that summer was finally over. Yoongi and Jungkook also placed their orders and the waitress went to prepare them. You tried not to let your surprise show when she tenderly stroked her hand over Jungkook’s shoulders. Yoongi, on the other hand, was not quite so reserved. You saw from the corner of your eye how he raised an eyebrow inquiringly. Jungkook gave a nervous laugh when he saw this. 

“Got some explaining to do, huh?” His fingers brushed across the edge of the menu as he searched for the right words. “I met Alisa about four weeks ago when I first came to this café.”

“Four weeks?” Yoongi asked, “then that’s still pretty new.”

Jungkook smiled slightly. “Yes, it is–” The rest of the sentence was interrupted by Alisa, who brought you your drinks. With a little ‘Thank you’ you accepted the cup. After everyone had received their drink, she took a seat next to Jungkook. You couldn’t see it, but it looked like she reached for Jungkook’s hand under the table and you had to hold back a smile. 

“I am glad to finally meet you,” she greeted you with the same warm smile as before. “Jungkook has told me a lot about you two.”

“Oh no,” it bubbled out of you before you could stop it. But Alisa just laughed. 

“Nothing bad, don’t worry, Y/N. Jungkook only spoke highly of you. About both of you,” she emphasized with a look at you and her smile promised that she probably knew your and Jungkook’s background story, but did not condemn you for it. She looked to the side and shared a little smile with Jungkook. You were happy for Jungkook, of course you were. Yet you couldn’t help but wonder about the suddenness with which Jungkook was over you. The two of them were obviously more than happy and, what you realized at once, obviously in love. And yet the two had only known each other for about a month? 

Could it be that…?

You didn’t want to ask, it wasn’t your place to question Jungkook and Alisa. It would be embarrassing if you were wrong. But the more your eyes flitted back and forth between the two of them, the more certain you were. Jungkook focused his attention on you again and it seemed as if the question that was burning on your mind was also written all over your face.

He smiled somewhat shyly and then gave a satisfied sigh. “I know what you are thinking, Y/N,” he said. You remained silent, hoping that he would add something to his statement. “I was really disappointed when I found out about the whole plan and about Yoongi. I don’t think we have to pretend that I wasn’t.” You looked at him with sad eyes, but he was right. To pretend that your actions didn’t hurt him was pointless. “But all that’s behind us now and I don’t hold any grudge against you. On the contrary,” he explained and you saw out of the corner of your eye how Alisa smiled slightly. “I understand how you felt when suddenly everything turned upside down. Because I feel the same way.” He threw a sincere smile at you before he and Alisa looked at each other. That look you saw with your own eyes said it all and a smile spread across your face. 

“Congratulations, both of you,” Yoongi said with a short nod and at the same moment you felt his hand on your thigh. Without hesitation, you grabbed it with your hand and intertwined your fingers. He squeezed them tight once, as if to confirm that everything would be okay from now on. 

“I’m very happy for you, I can’t put it into words how much,” you said, “You know that I only wanted you to be happy, Jungkook.”

“I am,” he said almost dreamily as he and Alisa continued to look at each other. “Very much so.”

When you said goodbye to each other a good two hours and relaxed conversations later, a stone fell from your heart. As distressed and confused as you had entered the café, as liberated you felt when you left it again. Yoongi didn’t say much on the way back, but you knew that he felt the same way. The radio silence between him and Jungkook had caused him more trouble than he showed. He didn’t want to burden you even more with it because you already felt too much guilt anyway. But he, too, seemed to have a slight jump in his walk; the Sword of Damocles, which seemed to hover over you for the last few weeks, had disappeared. You wondered if it would be even more wonderful with Yoongi now.

After all, there was still one thing that you and Yoongi kept pushing back…

It was definitely not your fault, but rather Yoongi’s. If he hadn’t repeatedly reassured you that he wanted to wait with it because of you, you would begin to worry if something was wrong with you. But he wanted to make sure that you were ready and really wanted it. The fact that you had been sure of this weeks ago was not a significant argument for Yoongi. But maybe things had changed now that Jungkook had a soulmate and he had practically wished you both all the best?

At least you hoped so, because as patient as you were, you didn’t want to wait any longer. 

You took a quick sideways glance at Yoongi, who looked intently at the TV screen that was showing an episode of his favorite show. The weather had definitely diminished the last few days and had changed from bright sunshine to rainy and cloudy days. But you could not complain, on the contrary. The worse the weather was, the more time you could spend at home with Yoongi in peace. No distractions, no disturbances from other people… Actually, it was perfect to enjoy a little togetherness. Before you knew it, a soft sigh slipped across your lips. Yoongi kept looking at the TV but asked, “What’s wrong?”

“Oh, nothing,” you lied. You had brought up the subject so many times, hoping Yoongi would understand that you were really ready. All the more reserved you were now, your courage was more or less used up and you didn’t want to be rejected again. Even though Yoongi had made it clear to you that it wouldn’t be rejection on his part. But for you, it felt that way and you had the feeling that your emotions and desires would soon burst out of you.

Yoongi also sighed before he reached for the remote control and stopped the show. Then he turned his head towards you, “What’s really wrong, honey?”

Honey. He had gone over to that pet name a few days ago and as cheesy as you found it with other couples, as warm you felt all around you when he called you that. At least usually. But in the last few weeks there had been so much build-up that you just wanted to direct the attention back to the TV and the show at that moment. 

“It’s really nothing, and now watch your show again,” you said and you noticed yourself how your voice was nothing more than a mixture of whining and complaining. 

Yoongi sighed, but this time it sounded annoyed. He turned completely around to you now and looked at you waiting. But you remained silent and stared at the TV to make him understand what you wanted at that moment. He took your hand and pulled you in his direction. You were able to support yourself with your elbow on the sofa before you landed on it with your face. Annoyed, you looked up at him. “What?”

He had to grin because of your annoyed expression. “Is it possible you’re acting upset because you’re a little frustrated?”

“Frustrated?” you asked, almost outraged. “What the hell does that mean?”

Yoongi pulled you a little closer to him so that he could wrap his other arm around your body and pull you onto his lap. Your eyes widened slightly as his face was suddenly only a few inches away from yours. You felt his hot breath on your face and your eyes fluttered shut for a brief moment before you took a deep breath. 

“I think we both know exactly what I mean,” Yoongi whispered, and every syllable of his spoken words gently brushed against your lips, which had already opened slightly in anticipation.

“And what exactly is that?” you whispered back just as softly and you heard Yoongi laugh gently before he pressed his lips passionately on yours. You buried your hands in his hair and pulled him even closer to you, causing him to moan. The sound went straight to your crotch and your walls contracted around nothing. Was this finally the right time? Or did Yoongi tease you again, only to put you off until later? 

A bit hesitant you returned the kiss when you felt his tongue on your lips. You did not want to be left sitting there hot and ready again. Yoongi felt your reluctance and interrupted the kiss. He leaned back a bit and looked at you with a frown. “What’s wrong? Have I done something wrong? Is this going too fast for you?”

You looked at him with indignation for a moment before you gave an ironic laugh. “Too fast? Yoongi, we’ve talked about this so many times…”

You looked up just in time to see the short twitch of the corners of his mouth. Quickly he hid it again behind his played worried masquerade. “I don’t know what you’re talking about, baby.”

“You’re an idiot,” you mumbled and wanted to get up from his lap, but Yoongi held you tight at your hips and pressed you harder into his lap. You gasped for air as something hard pressed right into your crotch. 

“Oh, am I?” he asked innocently and began to circle your hips against his crotch. You could practically feel his erection swelling by the second. You gave in to the good feeling that was spreading inside of you and between your legs for a moment before you put your hands on his and stopped him in his movement. 

Seriously you looked at him. “I’m really serious, Yoongi. I don’t want to wait any longer and if you don’t want to do it yet, for whatever reason,” you ignored how defiant you sounded, “then let’s just stop it at this point and continue watching your show.”

“Shall I explain again the reasons why I blocked the last few times?” he asked with an equally serious expression. 

You immediately shook your head vigorously. “I’ve already listened to your lecture three times. I think I’m getting the hang of it.”

“Good,” Yoongi replied and his hands began to gently stroke your back before they finally buried themselves in your hair. “Then we’ve cleared everything up.”

For a moment, you were afraid that he would pull back and ask you to get up from his lap. All the more satisfied, and also a little excited, you were when he pushed your head down towards him and continued with the kiss exactly where you had stopped. Readily you opened your mouth and his tongue entered you. He explored your mouth, which he had gotten to know more than well over the past weeks, and absorbed your taste. He grunted contentedly into the kiss as you circled your hips against his. 

“Fuck, baby,” he murmured into the kiss and a second later he pressed his mouth firmly back onto yours. Slowly he let his hands slide under your shirt and you shivered slightly as you felt his cool, slightly rough fingertips on your naked skin. You could still taste the hint of coffee on his tongue as his played with yours. Your whole body felt like it was on fire and his cold hands almost burned on your heated skin. You wanted more, you needed more. You pressed your lips harder, more willingly on his and Yoongi seemed to understand. 

He grabbed the hem of your t-shirt and pulled it over your head in one quick movement. His eyes moved directly over your upper body and he absorbed all the information he saw before he looked into your eyes again. “I’ll probably never get used to this sight,” he said and spread many small, almost harmless kisses on your jaw and neck and décolleté. As he kissed further down and reached your shoulder, he once lightly bit your collarbone, eliciting a hissing sound from you. But Yoongi licked right across the spot with his tongue as if he wanted to ease the pain. 

You had your eyes closed to concentrate on Yoongi’s lips, which sucked at your neck and made you moan. So you blindly fumbled for his shirt and pulled it over his head as well. You could never get enough of him, of his light, almost pale skin, his contrasting jet black hair, which was running in a single strip from his belly button to the waistband of his jeans, or the muscles, which tensed and relaxed with every movement. And of course the fine black lines that carried your name. You wondered if you would ever not feel your heart pounding when your gaze fell on it. It was almost a surprise every time you saw the tattoo.

“Do you want to take this to your bedroom?” you asked the question you had never dared to ask before. But now seemed like the perfect moment. Hopefully Yoongi felt the same way. 

He pressed a kiss on your neck and on the spot where a dark blue hickey would probably be seen later on, before he looked at you from half closed eyes. His chest rose and fell faster than normal and it seemed as if he had to catch his breath again before he nodded. He gripped your thighs with a firm and secure grip and lifted you up without further ado. Quickly you wrapped your arms around his neck and could not suppress the giggle as he kicked his bedroom door with his foot and it slammed against the wall. “Not so rough,” you teased him and he gave you a meaningful look before he laid you down on the bed with your back first. 

“Let’s see if you say that in a moment.” He didn’t waste a second and was right above you. His mouth found yours and he lowered his hips. You willingly spread your legs so he could get between them. He grabbed your thigh and you wrapped it around his hip, always hoping to somehow pull him even closer to you. “Fuck, I’m so hard,” he moaned as his pelvis touched yours. He didn’t need to tell you that, you felt his cock more than clearly between your legs. Your fingers trembled slightly, you didn’t know from excitement or arousal, when you started to undo the buttons on his jeans. With some effort you pulled the tight jeans off his ass and he straightened up to take them off completely. 

You couldn’t help but stare. Your gaze was caught directly on his black boxer shorts, under which a distinct tent could be seen. Unconsciously you rubbed your thighs together to bring some friction to the place where you needed it most. You heard a throat clear and looked up in surprise. “My eyes are up here,” Yoongi said with a little smile. You straightened up slightly and reached behind you to open the fastener of your bra. Without paying much attention, you dropped it on the floor next to the bed. 

Immediately Yoongi lay down between your legs again and spread small kisses on your belly, around your belly button and further up until he finally arrived just below your left breast. There he devoted himself extensively to the tattoo, on which he distributed countless kisses and traced the fine lines with his tongue. You let your head roll to the side with a sigh when you felt his fingers on your other breast and he kneaded it gently. As he carefully rolled your nipple between two of his fingers, you couldn’t help but moan. 

He had moved from your tattoo to your breast and started sucking on your nipple. Only the loud sucking of his mouth and tongue and your moaning could be heard as he circled his tongue around your nipple. You could feel him grinning as he released your nipple with a loud pop and started to move down again. He grabbed the waistband of your pants and started to pull them down in a slow, teasing movement. You wiggled your legs impatiently to speed up the process, but Yoongi grabbed your ankles and looked at you seriously from below.

“We’ll take it slow or not at all,” he said and his voice showed you that he was not open to discussion. “This is your first time and I want it to be as enjoyable as possible.”

“You are here, so that’s already enough,” you returned without hesitation, but Yoongi rolled his eyes. 

“I mean it, Y/N. The first time is usually not as great as it’s always shown in movies. At least not the sex itself. That’s why I want to make the rest of it as pleasant as possible. Deal?”

You looked at him for a moment and wondered if it was worth discussing. You wanted him, everything from him and best of all right now. But he looked at you as seriously as you had hardly seen him before, and that showed you that he was serious about it. Therefore, after a short consideration, you nodded and let yourself sink back into the soft cushions. He gave you a short kiss on the calf and with a mixture of kisses and slight flicks of his tongue, he made his way further and further upwards. Centimeter by centimeter he explored the skin on your legs and when he reached your thighs and his soft lips nibbled slightly on the skin on the inside, you squirmed a bit. 

He made a dissatisfied sound and wrapped his hands tightly around your thighs so that you could not move them. “Yoongi…” you whimpered and tried to push him further towards your core with your hands in his hair. The glance he gave you when he realized what you were doing went right through you, and you felt your slip already sticking on you, so wet you were. He clicked briefly with his tongue and you watched the movement with anticipation. He shook his head slightly and muttered something of which you only understood the two words “impatient” and “brat”. 

But even he seemed to have had enough of the slow pace for now, when he took one hand off your leg and carefully pushed your slip aside with one finger. You sighed as the cold air hit your heated opening and Yoongi also sighed at the sight he saw. You, under him and completely devoted to him, while your opening almost throbbed and begged to be filled with something. His mouth was almost watering when he noticed your juice dripping out of you, so aroused were you. Unconsciously he licked his lips before he buried his head between your legs and took a first taste of you. 

He moaned as his tongue slipped over your labia and with one long movement he licked as much of you as possible. You arched your back and were glad to have Yoongi’s hands that held you down as you moaned loudly. Oh God, you did not know where to go. Where to put your hands, which were buried in the blanket at the moment. Where to put that indescribable feeling that radiated from your lower abdomen and consumed you completely. Yoongi’s tongue circled around your clit and you whimpered. 

“Oh God, Yoongi,” you moaned and he took one of your hands to bury it in his dark curls. “Fuck, please don’t stop.” You pressed him harder between your legs and he sucked on your plump bundle of nerves, hard. The knot in your abdomen tightened and you already had the feeling that you were about to come. By yourself it took you minutes, sometimes even hours and nothing felt as good as Yoongi, who could send shivers through your entire body with the smallest of movements. 

You could feel him grinning before he took one hand off your leg. You let your legs slide a little further apart to give him enough room and a moment later you felt one of his fingers at your opening. He rubbed his finger over your labia and coated it with your moisture before he started to press it against your opening. “We have to prepare you,” you heard him murmuring softly, but the only thing you could concentrate on was his tongue, which was still working on your clit, and his finger, which slowly penetrated you. Almost gently, he advanced centimeter by centimeter, so you could get used to him. When he had completely penetrated you, he slowly pulled it out of you again. The next time he penetrated you, his ring finger joined him and you held your breath as he stretched you. 

He gave you a kiss on your inner thigh when two of his fingers were buried deep inside you. “You’re doing so good, baby,” he praised you and returned to your clitoris. He enveloped it with his lips and sucked on it while his fingers began to curl and search for that slightly rough spot inside you. Your eyes opened and you gasped loudly for air when Yoongi’s fingers found that spot and you heard him laugh softly. Over and over again, he hit your G-spot with every further curl of his fingers, and his tongue and lips sent white heat over you, so you had to squeeze your eyes together because you felt like you couldn’t stand this overwhelming feeling otherwise. 

“Yoongi–,” you began, but you couldn’t get another word out. Instead, indefinable sounds followed, all of which suddenly stopped with a particularly hard curl of his fingers against your G-spot. Your mouth fell open as a hot wave of excitement swept over you, bringing your orgasm with it. Yoongi’s name fell from your lips like a mantra as he helped you squeeze even the last drop of your orgasm before his fingers stopped inside you. He looked up and through almost closed eyes you saw his chin shining in the light of the bedroom. You let your head fall back again and felt the heat of the effort on your cheeks now joined by a little bit of embarrassment. 

You felt Yoongi straighten up and when you opened your eyes again, he hovered right above you. “Are you okay?” he asked and stroked your cheek with his thumb. You nodded, that’s all you were capable of and you tried to control your breathing. “Good,” he whispered and wiped his chin with his forearm. You watched the movement and when he dropped his arm again, he raised his eyebrows with a grin.

“God, you are so hot,” it slipped out of you before you could think about it. Yoongi’s grin grew even bigger and he pressed his lips to yours. You could taste yourself and never thought that something like that would turn you on. But it did. You lifted your pelvis and pulled Yoongi between your legs again with the help of your leg, which you wrapped around his hips. His one leg was between yours and came in contact with your core. You moaned into the kiss and quickly reached for his boxer shorts, the last piece of clothing that was still left. 

Yoongi helped you pull them all the way down and his cock jumped free against his stomach. You couldn’t help but gently grab him and stroke your thumb over his tip, on which a considerable amount of pre cum had already formed. You spread them on his tip and Yoongi let his head drop with a groan. “Fuck,” you heard him murmuring and you started to move your hand slowly but steadily up and down. It wasn’t long before Yoongi pushed his hips towards you with every move you made and you couldn’t hold back the proud smile that spread across your face. 

“Baby,” he said breathlessly and grabbed your wrist. When he looked up, your breath stopped. There was passionate lust in his eyes such as you had never seen in him before and his eyes were almost black, so much his pupils were dilated. You loosened your grip and he rummaged in his bedside table before he put a square package on the bed next to you. A bit intimidated you looked at it and you realized at once that only a few moments would separate you from finally becoming one with Yoongi. 

Yoongi noticed your look and he grabbed your chin. “We don’t have to go all the way today, we can stop here,” he reassured you, but you shook your head immediately. If he would stop now, you would probably cry with disappointment. 

“I want this,” you told him again to reassure him. He leaned back a little so he sat on his knees between your spread legs and grabbed the condom. He tore open the wrapping and with a skillful roll he put the condom on. You wondered if it was normal to find this hot or if it was just because of Yoongi. That he had so much experience reassured you immensely. He knew what he was doing and the thought alone made you squeeze your legs together. 

“But if there’s anything wrong, if you feel uncomfortable for even a moment… please let me know immediately,” he whispered and you nodded. 

He took one deep breath before he supported himself with one hand next to your head and with the other hand grabbed his cock to guide it to your opening. “Normally I would suggest that we use lube,” he said with a grin and looked up at you for a moment before he looked back between your two bodies, “But you’re so wet I can just glide into you.” You felt his thick tip at your entrance and tried to relax. 

Yoongi leaned down to you and kissed you gently while at the same time he penetrated you slightly. Your breath faltered as he stretched you much further than his two fingers had done and you could swear that you were holding your breath as he pushed his way into you bit by bit. The first feeling of discomfort disappeared quickly as he slowly pulled himself out of you and entered you again, all at a slow pace to get used to him. Until even the last feeling of too much disappeared and gave way to pure pleasure. 

You wrapped your legs around his hips and let him know that he could pick up his pace. You smiled at him and he dropped his head on your shoulder. His hot breath hit your collarbone as he let his hip snap hard against yours in the next move. You stifled a choked moan as he did the exact same thing again and the clapping from skin to skin was added to your passionate moans. 

His hand found your hip and his fingers pressed into your flesh as he picked up a faster pace. With each thrust, his cock stroked past your G-spot and your inner walls were practically sucking him in, hoping to feel more and more of him. 

“Baby, you are so… fuck. You’re so tight,” he brought out between thrusts and you clung to his back just to get a little more support. You needed something to hold on to and his muscular back was practically inviting. He pushed hard into you one more time before he came to a halt deep inside you. He breathed heavily and between breaths he spread wet kisses all over your neck. Then he straightened up, took your arms and placed them on his shoulders. You understood and your heart was pounding up to your neck as he placed one hand on your lower back and pressed you firmly against him and a moment later you had switched positions. 

However, he did not release the tight grip around you and wrapped his arms around your upper body before giving you a passionate kiss. You felt him twitch inside you as you bit his lower lip and held it for a moment between your teeth before releasing it again. 

“You are breathtaking,” he said between two kisses and caressed your back. When he had reached your butt, he grabbed both buttocks with his hands and kneaded them, causing you to sigh softly. He pressed you closer into his lap before you let your hips slide back again. When you let yourself sink back into Yoongi’s lap, you felt his cock sliding even deeper into you. You both moaned at the same time. He let himself fall backwards onto the pillows and his hands remained firmly on your hips. They gave you support and guidance how you should move. He looked at you through almost closed eyes and your gaze fell further down, where he bit his lower lip. You stopped your movements and stroked your thumb over it, releasing it. 

“I want to hear you, Yoongs,” you told him honestly and he gave you a little kiss on your thumb. 

“You are so beautiful how you ride me, baby,” he said and his gaze fell on the spot where your two bodies met and connected. As you continued to circle your hips and move up and down, you began to gently circle your clitoris. You almost cried out when your finger touched it, you needed the touch so much. Your eyes closed so that you missed Yoongi’s gulp as he absorbed the sight in front of him. He looked at the tattoo, which was more than prominent on your skin, and he stroked it with his finger. You opened your eyes again and grabbed his wrist, only to place his hand a few inches higher on your breast. You didn’t need to tell him twice and he let your nipple roll between his fingers. 

You felt your abdomen contract again at the next, new spot where you felt stimulation and you knew that you would not last long after your last orgasm. You let your fingers work faster and harder on your clitoris and Yoongi helped you to pick up a faster rhythm with his free hand. 

“Are you close?” he asked breathlessly and you nodded while squinting your eyes and concentrating on the feeling between your legs. That’s why you didn’t see Yoongi put his feet on the mattress and pulled you to his chest with a sudden tug and pressed you against him with his hands on your hips. You needed that, otherwise you would have flew up towards the ceiling when he let his hips slam against yours hard. 

“Oh… My… Fuck,” the words fell from your lips as Yoongi rammed your G-spot with every one of his thrusts. The friction of his pelvis against your clitoris did the rest, so that moments later you were pushed over the edge and had your second orgasm of the evening. Yoongi followed with a few more thrusts before he finally came to a stop deep inside you and emptied himself into the condom. 

You both breathed heavily and stayed like that for a moment, both completely exhausted from the last hour. Only when you felt Yoongi slowly relaxing inside of you, did you start to stir again. You straightened up even though your arms and legs were like rubber and let him slide out of you. You immediately missed the feeling of him inside you, but you knew that the next time wouldn’t be too far away. He pulled the condom off and threw it in his trash can after he tied it. When he turned back to you, a small but satisfied smile played around his lips. Naturally, his hand placed itself on your hip and pulled you closer to him. 

“You are the best thing that has ever happened to me,” he said and gave you a kiss on the tip of your nose. 

You had to grin. “Couldn’t have been any cornier, could it?” You laughed and Yoongi rolled his eyes, but he too joined in your laughter. 

“If it’s the truth,” he almost muttered embarrassedly, and you couldn’t really see it in the dim light of the bedroom, but you thought a slight pink glow was shimmering across his cheeks. 

Your heart almost burst at the sight of the man lying naked beside you, revealing his heart to you. And you knew that you didn’t have to hold back, you didn’t have to hide anything. Therefore you did not hesitate with the next sentence. “I love you, Yoongi.”

His eyes leapt towards you and fell on your smile that had spread on your face at your words. “What are you doing to me?” he asked more to himself than to you and pressed his lips to yours in a short kiss. Then he laid his forehead on yours, eyes still closed. “I love you too, Y/N.” And these few words woven around your tattoos and both your hearts like a promise. 

A promise forever. 

————————

Oh God, guys :(( I swear, I’m so sad ending this story. I really hope you liked the ending, I just couldn’t not give Jungkook a soulmate. He was too kind and cute in this story and I would have felt so bad if I wouldn’t have given him the happy ending he deserved. 

This is probably one of my last stories with a soulmate au for a while (except for A Thousand Springs of course, this one is still going). I still have one more story planned (an OT7 one) but I really want to write something different now. I started writing a hybrid story with Taehyung and an one shot with Hoseok, so please look out for that :) I hope I can get a bit of writing done in the next few weeks. I’m not in the best place mentally right now and just frustrated because it’s so difficult finding a job. I swear, most companies look for a twenty something person with decades of experience, I can’t deal with any more rejections. But anyway, sorry for rambling. 

I hope you liked this story and thank you for reading and leaving all this lovely feedback! I came back to all your kind comments and reblogs whenever I had a bad day and they made me so happy! So please stay safe everyone and see you hopefully soon! 💜

Tag list:

@loveyoongles @missseoulite @mymainaccountlol @stillcopingxx @boywithtofucheekies @betysotelo18 @wrecklesseuphoria @welcometothecity @teresaisla @kaheryn @forever-once-gone @deathkat657 @daisybutterlions @ilillyshadow @purplelady85​ @kelitt @katbonv @mickmoon @aretha170 @tonystenk @mama-m0chi @yiyi4657 @xxsugababexx @chxmachxps @neverthefirstchoice​

[fireflyhwufanficwriter]

My thoughts on Dr. Stone’s S02E03 (“Call from the Dead”)

My thoughts after watching Season Two, Episode Three:

01. Taiju and Yuzuriha have different types of shoes – that’s a nice detail 😊

02. Leave it to Yuzuriha the arts and crafts club member to notice a detail like the dirt around the grave being different!

03. Day after day… I wasn’t expecting them to visit the grave THAT often. I like that they used the same phrase (“mainichi mainichi”) as last time – in Season One, Senku used it to describe Kohaku’s dedication to her sister, and now in Season Two, Nikki used it to describe Taiju and Yuzuriha’s dedication to their friend 😊

04. I liked Kohaku and Ginro’s excitement at hearing Taiju’s voice. This is the first time they’ve heard an outsider who they knew right away wasn’t an enemy! (Well, second time for Kohaku, since Senku saved her the day they met.)

05. The next time I’m on the phone with somebody, I’m going to imagine the same huge arc of electricity that Kaseki did 😁

06. Senku was so emotional – eyes shining with tears, smiling as he listened to Taiju – and then it all went away because he had to remind his friend that HE was Senku 😆

07. Just like how Gen is the stand in for the audience (modern timers, but generally clueless compared to Senku), Kokuyou and Ruri are the stand-ins for how incredible the phone must seem to Ishigami Village 😁 Come to think of it, Kokuyou’s had that role since last season – he’s far away enough from the main cast that he doesn’t know all of their adventures (and that distance makes him like the “normal” villagers), but close enough that he gets to share his thoughts and theories. It was through his eyes that we saw the big impacts that bottling and furnaces had on Ishigami Village 😊

08. I know it was short, but I like how Senku greeted Yuzuriha separately. They haven’t had that much screentime together since the anime began, but I like how Senku and Yuzuriha have their own friendship, instead of Taiju being their go-between or something like that.

09. “He’s been screaming all day.” All day? Have they been there longer than just the few minutes we’ve seen?

10. Kohaku noticed the defensive reason for why they had to speed things up! 😊 And I liked her observation about Senku and Taiju 😊

11. It’s could be easy to just write Taiju off as a loud blockhead, but it’s scenes like his allowing Tsukasa to hit him in Season One and his question about bloodshed in Season Two that really show you the kind of admirable, pacifistic guy he is 😊

12. “Gen will be back tomorrow or so.” Okay, so we have an estimate of how far the two kingdoms/empires are from each other. I’m glad they mentioned this!

13. Magma and Chrome’s loud conversation really shows how much anime can improve upon manga. When you’re just reading, you do know characters are talking and being loud, but when you’re watching anime, it drives home the fact that they’re being SO LOUD and that they need to SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP! Poor Gen… 😆

14. Thank you for finally saying Ukyo’s name, Gen 😆 Anime only folks get important information, and manga readers can sigh in relief that another character’s name has been revealed 😁

15. I’m with Magma. Chrome’s so selfish, worrying about his own life like that! 😡 Not like Magma, who’s strong and noble and self-sacrificing and only thinks of others and their safety 😁

16. You have to feel sorry for Gen… he’s trying to get the two of them to just SHUT UP 😆

17. I doubt Magma was seriously thinking that Chrome would go along with that plan, so he must have been joking… and the fact that we have Magma JOKING around with main characters after being the main antagonist in the middle part of Season One… they’re really pals now, aren’t they? 😲😊

18. Chrome’s battery has 15V… how much is that compared to an AAA battery for a remote control? I'll look it up later 😁

19. I’m a modern era person and it would have never occurred to me to use a wire to connect two ends of a battery and throw it into the grass to start a fire. Either Senku told him that battery stuff fairly recently and it was stuck Chrome’s mind because he was in charge of the heating team, or he’s just that much of a genius that nobody explained that to him but he intuited it anyway… or I’m just that stupid 😆

20. It’s expected that Chrome would sacrifice himself, but Magma… very impressive character development 😁 (I mean, I’m a manga reader, so I knew this was going to happen, but still 😁)

21. Gen’s eyes are blue? I never noticed until this episode.

22. Poor Gen… first, in Season One, he had to run like the wind from the shed of science to the Cave of Miracles while he was SEVERELY injured, and he had to do it as fast as possible to help Senku stay safe, and he was the only one who could do it… and now, he has to run like the wind while dealing with the knowledge and guilt that two of his comrades sacrificed himself for him, and he has to do it as fast as possible to be able to start his extremely important deception mission, and he’s the only one who can do it.

23. Gen really needs to get Kaseki to build him some kind of cable car system or a limousine so that he can travel in style between the two kingdoms/empires instead of exhausting himself all the time running back and forth 😲 Or at least a bicycle!

24. Since it’ll take Gen at least one day, possibly longer, to reach the shed of science, that means that Taiju and Yuzuriha must have talked to Nikki one or more days after they spoke with Senku. Anime helps with some things (like sound), but it can sure confuse people about the passage of time…

25. Copper swirly! 😊 I like Kaseki’s name for it better than Senku’s name for it 😆

26. Kohaku’s eyes! She’s SO fascinated by how the copper swirly is being used 😁

27. Nikki’s SO hostile 😲 I get that she’s a guard and everything, but she doesn’t really have a reason to be this hostile to Taiju and Yuzuriha, does she? It’s weird O.o Unless maybe she wanted to do something else (hunting/training/etc.) but she was forced to be their guard specifically because she’s a woman and can stick to Taiju AND Yuzuriha like glue? (Like Brienne from Game of Thrones.)

28. Why are her eyebrows a darker shade than her hair? This is sort of like Kokuyou’s weird hair colors, but to a lesser extent.

29. The punches are… she’s really hostile. Maybe it’s just to emphasize how much she changes later on and the episode, but it’s still so weird.

30. Didn’t Senku “die” on a cliff, out in the open? Kohaku was able to see him from (presumably) far away, and all that stuff with the gunpowder and the huge rock… am I remembering it wrong? Was it NOT a cliff after all? Because the rocks around this grave make it look like some kind of natural, concealed fortress!

31. Senku’s Sebastian voice sounds so silly 😆

32. I wish they had done Lilian’s voice differently. Gen’s fake Lilian doesn’t sound like a native English speaker while speaking English. Maybe they’re counting on the people they’re talking to not knowing the difference between foreign language accents… but still, this could have been done better. Maybe the studio just didn’t want to hire a new person to speak just a few lines. Or maybe they did this on purpose so that Nikki could notice something was off with her voice?

33. Yuzuriha being quick on the uptake again! 😁

34. This has to be the most stressful, rushed, and mathematical estimating of CD sales and body measurements ever 😆

35. The video game music was used in such a fun, light way last season (choosing the third mining team member) that hearing it in this scene for this situation sounds so weird 😲

36. That crouching backwards, pointing straight ahead Lilian pose seemed really out of place when the music is this really soft, gentle song 😲

37. I wonder if the stadium they showed us is based on a real stadium in Japan?

38. “Lilian doesn’t exist in this world anymore. Am I right?” Oh, Nikki… 😭

39. Senku’s eyes were shining when he replied to Nikki… I wonder if talking about Lilian reminded him of Byakuya… somebody who was in space with Lilian and also doesn’t exist in this world anymore… 😭

40. I love how Senku doesn’t lose anything or inconvenience himself at ALL by making that promise, since he’s going to protect the glass recording anyway because of Byakuya 😆

41. Okay, after Nikki committed to the plan (welcome, Nikki!), they zoomed out and the grave is seriously surrounded by all those vertical rocks. There is NO WAY this grave is in the same place Senku and Tsukasa last talked. No WAY.

42. I was SO surprised when the episode ended there 😲 That was NOT what I was expecting. This episode felt so short!

43. I still love this ending theme! 😁

44. About the ending theme (“Koe” / “Voice” by Hatena), songs mean a lot more to me when I understand what the lyrics mean, so I went to YouTube hoping to find an English cover or English subtitles or something. I found this video (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=scv09Dtby-8) by a YouTube channel called AniComet Music, and from 0:12 to 0:34, the lyrics are, “I keep struggling and suffering, but still / I’ll gain strength from the feelings I’ve had for you / It’s a story that will never change / Even though I knew I’d never be a match for him.”

45. Maybe it’s just me, but I feel the song is from Senku’s point-of-view, and both the second and fourth lines could be about Byakuya (especially the fourth line) – in a father/son context, of course – of how he gets strength and inspiration from Byakuya and how he feels his father will always be beyond him and more than him 😭

46. With that said, even though my interpretation is really meaningful to me, it doesn’t really make sense, since “you” and “him” are obviously different people, and when you read more of the lyrics, “you” can’t really be referring to Byakuya. Maybe my interpretation will change when I listen to the song more and read more translations, but this is the first English translation of the ending song that I’ve read, and it really speaks to me 😊

https://firefly-hwufanficwriterrrrr.tumblr.com/MyDrStoneEpisodeMangaThoughts

[abybweisse]

Ch172, Let’s look at Lau again, too

⚠️ Very long post!

What is he up to?!

I mean, yeah. He’s the Jester archetype, so I shouldn’t be too surprised, but it’s nerve-wracking, all the same.

His main gimmick is saying deep, dark, knowledgeable things (which are probably not a joke at all)... and then giving a well-timed pause... to then play the fool who knows nothing. I could give so many examples, but if you read the manga, you already know exactly what I’m talking about. He’s pulled that running gag almost half a dozen times by now.

I think he’s drawing from his own private experiences, mostly, it’s just that they fit so well with what’s going on, in that moment, that it’s unnerving to our earl, Sebastian, and anyone else present to hear it. Then it hits hard that he apparently doesn’t know what’s going on in the here and now. But the reader gets the distinct impression that he has had terrible experiences that parallel our earl’s enough and that he might also know way more about what’s going on than he pretends. His words might be entirely about himself, and he might be oblivious to the subject at hand. But I don’t think so. He’s pretty damn observant for someone who keeps his eyes closed most of the time. Plus, he’s an informant.

He couldn’t give our earl warnings about Haku and Owl, if he didn’t pay close attention to current events. And he acts hella-fast on the information he has. Somehow gets word about Haku’s assassination plans and has some knowledge about Owl? Sends a warning (by letter) while en route by ship so fast that it arrives at Phantomhive Manor before he can even make landfall in England. Finds out the truth about Mina and Harold? Sends Ran-Mao after them. Knows the Yard is after our earl and company? Locates them almost immediately and shows up in time to thwart the Yard’s manhunt. If Ran-Mao is his “cat”, then who TF are his “little birdies”? ���� Seriously, who are his own informants? Who are his messengers? Who needs Claude when you’ve got Lau in the center of his own web? It will be very interesting to learn (if we ever do) the extent of that network. Is it spies all over the place? Is it a handful of trusted people, like the girls at his opium den? Is it... just Ran-Mao? 🤷🏻‍♀️

But this all just makes him fit the Jester archetype even more, because that character is often burdened with extensive and heavy knowledge, and this behavior is a lighthearted way to portion out that knowledge or serious observations to other characters, as well as to the reader. This role gives them an easier way to break the fourth wall, for example. Though I haven’t noticed any examples of him doing that. This is also the archetype that needs to be entertained, otherwise they will lose interest and get bored. We know Lau has even told our earl how he’s motivated to stick around as long as it’s interesting and entertaining for him.

Similarly, Lau has done some hella scary and intimidating things... and then made light of them. Does it even matter to him whether Sebastian can survive the swords through the wardrobe “trick”? Either he knows Sebastian isn’t human and will be okay... or he doesn’t know and doesn’t particularly care. Are Harold West and Mina actually alive or dead? Acupuncture needles used as weapons and kept in your sleeves... are still weapons. He’s probably never even used them for medical purposes. There is a wild recklessness and ruthlessness about him, and the only times I’ve seen him so much as flinch are: 1. When he goes to Undertaker’s funeral parlor. Because Undertaker is scary even when he’s serving tea and offering biscuits... and 2. When Ada and her staff bust in with hazmat suits and spray Lau and Bard down with sanitizers. And strip them bare. And shave... everything. ✨ This is when you know he’s actually surprised.

I know the post is already long, but now it’s time to talk about what he’s doing in ch172. I’m breaking down every panel I noticed him in.

Why Chang, other than the fact it’s another common Chinese name?

This is a good excuse for when the staff finds his acupuncture needles, since I’m sure he brought them with him. Idk if they will return them to him. Possibly, even though he won’t be assigned to treat “Mr. Burgh”. We will have to see who calls him out on his tattoos and when. Someone might decide it’s best to hold onto his “Chinese medicine” supplies.

Qigong.

He can think on the spot, since they didn’t expect to be separated like this.

Bringing “Mr. Burgh’s” family’s wishes into this is a smart idea.

But then he does THIS. 🤦🏻‍♀️ I cannot imagine Lau saying this without realizing what he’s saying.

And he starts to walk out, instead of backing up his previous excuse that he needs to stay because of his client’s sensitivity and his family’s “strong request”.

Where was he going to go, once he got out the door? Sit in the waiting room... snoop around (good luck!)... leave the facility?

The feathers are a bit campy, but it does emphasize the “softness” of the interaction, even if it’s just an act.

Is it 💯 an act? I mean, it is an act. However, there might be a part of Lau that actually feels sorry for Bard, a part of him that sympathizes and knows what it’s like to survive combat while friends (or family) die. I feel as though Lau has extended such kindness to someone else in the past. Ran-Mao? Someone else? Who knows. At this point, it’s merely a feeling I have, since we know so little about his own hardships. But he had the, of that I’m sure....

As cute as many will surely find this image, this is some tense “we are either golden or about to die any moment” shit, right here.

They cling to each other not just in the hope of making this look real... but also possibly with their legit fear of being called out as frauds.

And they hold this pose until they are certain they have gotten their way. Bard with determination and fear on his face. Lau with a look of caring and concern. If you were to replace Bard with someone personally dear to Lau, this would not look odd at all.

I also want to point out that Lau has his eyes open here. It lends credibility to his seriousness. In a way that the sanatorium staff cannot understand. But we know he’s not to be messed with when his eyes are open. To the staff, it might just denote a level of protectiveness. Maybe even a silent plea.

This might be the first time we have seen Lau speak in Chinese. We’ve seen Ran-Mao do it a few times. Given the circumstances, it’s probably fine. It might even help convey a feeling of genuine gratitude.

Here’s a close-up of their facial expressions when they both simply say “Yes”. Bard is still being quite serious. Lau has completely lost the gravity he was displaying a very brief moment ago.

But then Lau completely drops the doctor persona and talks (with eyes open) about them barely making it through this. There, he’s seriously relieved they passed this test.

Closing his eyes again, Lau openly says “master cook” and “acting”! Says he had no plan on how to come back if he had left the room! If I were Bard, I’d want to punch him, too.

I think Lau is seriously scrutinizing this young nurse, Layla, and coming up with an assessment of her. Then he goes from serious to chipper. Gives a big smile. Says nothing is wrong. What does he really think about her?

The last thing he says to Layla reminds me of what Sebastian said to Arthur about taking care of our earl....

I am reminded of the cover page for ch170, and I still can’t make heads or tails of his ultimate goals. The ones that led him all the way to England, where he expects to use whatever means to reach whatever ends.

And I cannot get it out of my head, what the historical Ronald Knox said about not including a “Chinaman” in your detective fiction. It’s one of his “Ten Commandments of Detective Fiction”. Yana-san already broke all ten, in some way or other.

Will Lau turn out to be a Fu Manchu character? We already know he was ruthless in his rise up the ladder of Qīng Bāng. We just don’t have the details. What’s he willing to do now to achieve his ultimate goals?

😬