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kaashiboo · 4 years ago

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hiii i hope u have a nice day! how would akaashi and kita react if their s/o cries because of how much they love them?? idek if that makes sense nsnsm but i hope u understand ! byeee stay safe

haikyuu boys reacting to you crying because of how much you love them

┇ akaashi and kita

→fluff

gn!reader

【warnings: none】

✎ a/n: AAAH this is the first ever request that I've gotten so i was really excited when i saw the notification heh:') i really appreciate the request! i hope i did well on this oneee. stay safe to you too! <3 and thank you for your patience because i know this took a long time hehe.

akaashi

you were patiently waiting in the library for akaashi as he offered to study with you for the upcoming exams but since he still has practice, you decided to just wait for him.

you had a mental debate with yourself whether you should start studying already or just use your phone— and you obviously choose the latter.

you stared at your wallpaper, it was a candid picture of akaashi crouched down with bread crumbs on his palms as an attempt to feed the birds. it was honestly such a lovely experience.

a wide grin never left your face. a sigh of contentment escaped from your lips. you propped your elbow on the table, resting your chin on your palm as you continually scroll through your album named 'memories with keiji<3'.

you stop scrolling for a while, starting to realize how lucky you are to have akaashi in your life. memories of you two together flooded your mind and you start tearing up.

"love, try feeding the birds. just try not to... look scary." he teased, you let out a loud and offended 'huh?', startling some of the birds and he gave you an i-told-you look.

"y/n, sweetie. i bought snacks for you since i heard from the school's nurse that you were having some bad cramps."

"sweetheart, it's okay to cry. i'm here now, you don't need to hide your feelings from me because i would always be more than willing to help you, okay?"

"you did great, my love! i am so proud of you. i love you."

you hadn't noticed that akaashi was secretly watching you from afar until you heard a soft thump on the floor and you quickly looked up at him.

"kei—" you were about to greet him but he immediately embraced you.

your eyes widened in surprise, rubbing his back soothingly. "is there something wrong?" you whispered softly, your other hand making its way to play with his hair.

"shouldn't i be the one asking you that?" he pulled away, cupping your cheeks in his hands and wiped your tears with his thumb and you finally noticed that you were crying the whole time.

"oh no," you laughed a bit. "i'm alright, keiji. i was just overwhelmed." you tried explaining but he was still reluctant at your response and so you picked up your phone that you placed on the table as soon as you caught sight of his presence.

"see? i was just looking at our pictures. i swear, i didn't mean and i never even noticed that i started crying." he finally relaxed. sensing that you were still in a good mood.

"but why were you even crying in the first place?" you slowly turned your head to the side where you can't see him. too embarrassed to answer but he held your chin between his thumb and index finger, slowly guiding your head to face him.

you knew you could have looked away but you couldn't help but to just stare back. "i love you." you blurted, causing him to smile.

"i love you too, sweetheart. but i don't think that answers my question."

"well that was my answer." you saw his smile turn into a small smirk, "i don't think i understand what you're trying to imply, my love. could you please explain it more?" you playfully pinched his cheeks before planting a kiss on the same spot.

"it's okay to cry, love." he muttered.

kita

"how has he been?" granny yumie looked at you adoringly as you prepared a bento box to bring to kita as he was still in practice.

"he's been treating me better than anyone could, granny." you answered honestly.

"that's good to hear, y/n-chan, but i think i would love to hear you talk about him more. come on, it's just the two of us." she insisted. you chuckled before wrapping up the food you had prepared before sitting down on the floor across her. ready to give in and do what she requested.

"shinsuke is a very lovely boy, granny. truth to be told, i was very intimidated when i first bumped into him and the way he looked at me weirdly because i was the one who apologized when he spilled his drink on me,” you laughed as you thought about it.

“but he was also kind enough to lend me his jacket before he rushed off to practice and i was thankful for it because i at least had the reason to find him and return him his jacket.” you glanced at granny yumie who was intently listening to you talk.

“and the day after that, i returned his jacket but he insisted that i should keep it,” you paused again, smiling a bit before pointing at the jacket you were currently wearing. “it’s this one.” you said before continuing with your story.

“and because we were in the same year, he would always give me his notes even though i don’t really need them— well i kinda do need them since i don’t like writing. not only that but he offered to always walk me home.”

“granny, i wonder how he’s able to pull off that kind of thing?” you bit your lips, trying to come up with an answer.

“what thing, dear?”

“he may not be the most affectionate person in the world but i still feel so loved whenever i’m with him. he’s not like me who always craved their partner’s touch but even so, he still manages to show that he cares and that he loves me very much and i am beyond grateful to have him. he’s so patient and understanding with me.” you pouted in a playful manner, trying to hide the fact that you were close to crying.

you’ve never had problems with talking about your relationship with kita to other people but this conversation with granny yumie is different since you were used to talk about the two of you casually but this time, nothing but sincerity lingered in the air and you couldn’t help but swallow the lump in your throat that was starting to build up.

“ah, i think they would have their break in a few minutes soon, granny. i should probably go ahead now.” you excused yourself.

“be careful on the way, y/n-chan.” she reminded you.

“will do, granny! thank you for helping me prepare shin’s food.” you bowed and left hurriedly.

once you are out of the house, you let the tears stream endlessly, clutching tightly onto the fabric wrapped around the bento box to not accidentally let it go.

you were walking at a fast pace not until someone held your shoulders, forcing you to look up.

“y/n?”

“shin!” you yelped in surprise, wiping your tears with the back of your hand before smiling at him.

“wait why are you here? aren’t you supposed to be in practice?” you narrowed your eyes. realizing that he was wearing a new t-shirt.

“i could be asking you the same question, darling. but to answer yours, we ended practice early.” he let go of you before scanning your face completely and you felt like melting under his gaze, “do you want to talk about it?” he asked.

“it’s a ridiculous reason, shin. it’s fine.” you insisted before holding your hand out for him to get the food that you made for him and he gladly accepted it.

“nothing is ridiculous if it’s you, y/n. especially if it’s your feelings. you know that you can talk to me about anything, right?” he grabbed your wrist gently, pulling you to the bench near where you two were standing and pushed you down to sit.

shin: y/n, good morning. please do not forget to eat breakfast.

shin: hello. i heard from your classmates yesterday that you would have a quiz later. do not forget to review. if you need my help, just call me.

shin: the nurse told me you were sick. don’t wait for me anymore, we decided to not have practice today. i’ll pick you up from your classroom then walk you home and take care of you.

shin: y/n, love? suna just sent me a screenshot of the songs you’re currently listening to. are you sure you feel fine?

“love. i know that you are great friends with the twins but is it okay if you tell them to not always smother you especially when you are with me?” kita said. trying to keep his tone remain usual but the hint of bitterness was still there.

you felt him squeeze your hand when you chuckled at him. “of course, shin. i’ll make sure to tell them that. i’m sorry if it made you uncomfortable.” you reassured.

you’ve heard kita sigh for the fifth time ever since he arrived at your house.

“shin? is something bothering you?”

“y/n. i know i may not be the most affectionate person but please do not hesitate to initiate affection for me.” you couldn’t help but smile at him. completely placing your phone down on your bed.

“of course, baby. do you have a particular reason that made you say that to me?” you asked, worried.

“you haven’t hugged me ever since i got here.” you almost could not hear him but his straightforward attitude never failed to amuse you and so you pulled him into a tight hug immediately.

“love?” you heard him utter once again and you finally snapped out of your trance. tears threatening to escape once again.

“please tell me what’s wrong.” he looked at you worriedly.

“i love you.” you smiled.

“i know. i love you more, y/n. but i am still concerned about you.”

“nothing’s wrong, shin. don’t worry. i was just thinking of how lucky i am to have you.” he chuckled at your statement.

“is that why you’re crying?” you nodded as a response, laughing awkwardly.

“well, i think that is an odd reason, y/n. however, i know that crying is not only caused when a person is sad. it can be caused my numerous reasons but i think i would rather see you smile.” he gently wiped the tears away with his handkerchief that you two bought together at a mall when you had your first date.

“you still have those?” you pointed at the piece of fabric and he nodded.

“of course i do. i keep everything that has anything to do with you— oh no, love, please stop crying.” he slightly panics.

#kaashiboowrites #haikyuu!!#haikyuu x reader #haikyuu imagines #haikyuu fluff #haikyuu scenarios #akaashi x reader #akaashi imagines #akaashi fluff #akaashi scenarios #akaashi keiji #kita x reader #kita imagines #kita fluff #kita scenarios #kita shinsuke #haikyuu headcanons

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jovalencia · 4 years ago

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we all knew this was coming and I’m a sentimental bitch. I just wanted to write all my mutuals some little messages about how much I love you. you guys have changed my life and I am so grateful for each and every one of you!!!💕💞💓💗💖💘 anygays have fun searching for yourself in this mess and I’m sorry for any typos, I’m illiterate (and if i forgot you it’s because i lost my brain in 1912)

@cr1spyy fernanda, my first ever mutual. who would have thought that your 5th wave posts would have brought one of the most amazing people in my life to me. your posts always make me laugh and your dedication to the good morning asks is admirable (fr I could never have that much consistency) you’re so kind to everybody and you’re absolutely beautiful and incredible and I fucking love you so much. I honestly don’t even want to think about what my life would be like if I had never met you, MWAH💕🤍

@sundaymorninghangover I remember you being my first ever note!! you liked this post I made that was a reblog of a “uquiz” that was actually a rickroll lmao. you didn’t even follow me back then but whatever. Then I remember waking up one day to see that you had tagged me in a bingo ask game and I was like “ummm tf is an ask game” but I do still have a bingo card for it that I never used ekenksjs. anygays, you have good opinions on everything and you’re absolutely fucking hilarious. If you told me back in may that I would be friends with you I wouldn’t believe it bc you intimidated me but regardless I’m glad to be an arson gang member with you. your memes are god tier and so is your music taste. I love you whore!!!!!🖤💜

@sound-and-colors ma’am you’re so nice and for what??? the aesthetic stuff that you reblog is *chef’s kiss* and nobody else is out there doing it like you. we’ve never talked but I just know that you are absolutely incredible mwah❤️💛

@embeddedinmybrain tasfia you are the nicest person on his hellsite and you know it (I hope). It was so much fun being your secret admirer anon while it lasted, like fr I loved it. Your art is beautiful just like your heart and i honestly don’t know what I did to deserve such a kind soul like you in my life. You’re always there to hype me up and ily (also just cut your own hair already I believe in you)🤍💙

@gumptin you hooked me with your suus icon and reeled me in by being the coolest and funniest person ever. your posts are consistently hilarious, accurate, or relatable and I admire that. I mean it when I say you’re one of the coolest people on here. idk what I did to have you think I’m cool but I’m honored nonetheless. also you have really awesome style and hair jdnjdjdjd mwah💚💛

@nori-in-pink first and foremost, your blog always has a very nice aesthetic and I feel like I need to acknowledge that. anyway, you are so kind and supportive and you don’t take any bullshit and that is absolutely amazing. you are absolutely iconic and always reblog the best stuff so I know I can count on your blog to be fantastic. you used to scare me (idk why don’t ask) but now I know that you’re just a big teddy bear ily💗💜

@matteohnora my slurpee queen and my mememate!! you always send me the funniest shit and it doesn’t go unappreciated. You’re always there for me with a silly meme or emotional support and I don’t think I’ve ever told you how grateful I am for that. whenever you stalk my blog it makes my heart go whooosh and I feel so special. Ily and I am so glad to have met you💜❤️

@lieverobbe ah yes, the girl with the impeccable music taste. that’s what I know you as, oh well. you are more talented and kind than you could ever believe and your edits are amazing!!! whenever I see you on my dash I get all happy bc I’m like “em’s here!!!” I love all your lil posts and I am so glad that you are my mutual ilyyyyy💙🤍

@ironymane you’ve watched limitless which automatically makes you amazing. you’re an absolutely incredible and amazing person and even tho you aren’t on here as much anymore, I still love youre lil posts. And one time you kept me entertained on a 6hr car ride so you deserve some kind of award for that. ly🧡💛

@kingarthurpendragons okay the obvious thing to talk about here is your incredible talent when it comes to gif making. Like how in the hell- but you are also so kind and loving and it doesn’t go unnoticed. You don’t have to send nice asks but you do and ily for it mwah!!❤️💗

@engelkeijsers the skam nl stan that we all deserve to have in our lives. you are so fucking hilarious and relatable and all around amazing and for what? your posts always put a smile on my face and it is so much fun to clown with you. ilyyyy💚💛

@happiness-isin-you let’s ignore the fact that it took me forever to realize that this was your main lmao. your art is some of the most beautiful shit I’ve ever seen. like your style is so cool???? I could literally go on about this for hours don’t test me. the cute animal pictures are the absolute best and you’re always there for emotional support. Ilyyyyyyy💛❤️

@isakyaqi fiz you are so kind and talented and cool and I really do mean all that. You reblog always the best of content so I know I can trust it. you always put nice tags in the things you reblog things and it’s fun to read what you write because it’s almost always you hyping up the creator or the thing itself. you are awesome jdjdjdndjjd mwah🖤🤎

@cash-queens sam oh sam. Idek where to start with how much ily. You’re my famous mutual which is very iconic of you and you put up with my cat pictures and my silly antics and my riverdale posts. You’re so kind to me and everybody and whenever I make a post when I’m having a mental breakdown you’re always there to make sure that I’m doing okay. That def doesn’t go unappreciated. You’re legitimately one of the kindest and most amazing people I’ve ever known and I love you so much, more than you could ever know💛🤍

@welcometo-saturn çağrı you’re so cool. end of statement. that’s all I have to say about it. your gifs are so beautiful and you don’t take shit from anybody. you’re so down to earth that it makes it seem like you’re somebody who I’ve just always known (even tho we’ve never talked sjdjdjdjdj) so yeah anyway, you’re are a really awesome person with really good opinions and I am so glad that we are mutuals🧡❤️

@amifeelingokay it’s difficult not to start with your url bc it’s amazing and I love it. your skam posts are always so nice and cute and positive (just like you!!) and I love them. the content you reblog is always aesthetic or a nice text post and I just love your blog okay. ily💜🖤

@isthatelpome you’re so nice that I’m willing to overlook your opinion on salt and vinegar chips (they’re not good I’ll fight you on that) your dani icon is beautiful just as you are, mwahhhh🧡❤️

@earthling-isa babe you are so cute with your lil edits and your clowning. the near constant black and white aesthetic is very iconic and i love it. you’re a suus stan so I have no choice but to love you for it. i absolutely adore your gifs, especially the ones with the lil squares in the middle fygzbgut. you are absolutely beautiful and incredible and kind and I love you MWAHHHH🖤💙

@grey-mist-exist okay we’ve never talked but you seem like such a rad person. not cool but like rad (there are are subtle differences) your art is beautiful even tho idk the quotes (go off smarty pants) and overall you are just really rad, idk how else to say it mwah!!!🤍🖤<pretend it’s a grey heart

@fatoudixon hey look it’s one of the most talented people here!!! You’ve always been so kind and supportive of me and I really really do appreciate it. you have good opinions on everything and did I mention that you’re talented?? cause you are, very. Your reaction videos are amazing and not to mention iconic, just like your hair. anyway, ily and I am so glad that I have somebody as amazing as you as my mutual💙💛

@sander-klaas you are so kind and and you have so much passion. I can always trust you reblog only the best of wtfock and sobbe content which I am very grateful for. you literally just started making gifs and they are so beautiful (okay it was like months ago but whatever dkdjdjjdjdj) anyway, thank you so much for being my mutual mwah❤️💛

@jusdekiwi okay we’ve never talked but you genuinely seem like such a sweet person??? I love the stuff you reblog, it’s always the best gif sets. idk I can just tell you have good taste. I hope to get to know you better in the future, but for now I am very grateful to have you💚💙

@kritiquer my twin!!! you and I have a lot in common so ofc I love you. I’m joking obviously.... anygays you are always so supportive of everybody and you are so sweet. I love all of your personal posts, it always makes me really happy to see what you’re up to and how you’re feeling. I also like the aesthetic stuff you reblog, I have bad taste in all that, clearly you don’t. I am so glad that we started talking and I hope that we continue! ily kit!!!!💜🤍

@bleachblondebitches you aren’t on here that much, but whenever you are I get so happy! Your gifs are beautiful and I think about your sobbe and booksmart parallels gifset every day. you have amazing taste in movies and I love you!💜💙

@lesbeanfatou clara!!! bitch!!!! You already know how much I love you but I guess I’ll reiterate. I honestly don’t know what I did before I knew you. I always remember looking at the no idea blog with the Nora icons like “who is this?” Little did I know back then that you would be one of my closest friends. your support of me means the world and I am so grateful for you. I’m so glad that I have somebody in my life like you to talk to and be friends with. you are one of the funniest people in and I just love you so much I could burst mwah❤️🧡

@gucciboner okay hiii ypu are literally so fucking kind and funny, i admire your sense of humor sm. your art is so beautiful and you are so goddamn talented, it never ceases to amaze me. I also love all the little funny posts you make and reblog!! ily💙💗

@helmtaryn even though you put supernatural on my dash, I am willing to forgive you bc I love you so much. your gifs are so beautiful like ma’am didn’t you just start?? icon shit. your hate for photoshop is iconic and you are awesome. you’re always sending me asks and responding to my posts and you’re so nice and it makes my heart go whooosh. anygays you’re cool and ily💙🧡

@starmansander nina when I tell you that you give off the best vibes- okay sorry I had to start with that. I love how you are so nice and supportive of me, it really means a lot. I really like the stuff you reblog like,,, cool art? pretty women? those hopeful little posts? iconic. also youre a noor stan which is a sign of good taste. love you🤎❤️

@ijzermanora daniiiiiii madam you are so epic and iconic and I really could go on about that forever. you are so kind and you’re following all my joke sideblogs (even the ch*cken l*ttle hate blog??? why???) which is very brave of you. I love reading all of your lil wholesome posts and hearing about school and how much you hate chemistry (even tho you like sushi???) anygays we were already sending memes 10 hours into our mutualship so I think we were soulmates from the very beginning. I love you so much and I have no idea what I did before i knew you💜💗

@alwaysin-myhead okay, you give off cool person vibes and I had to acknowledge that. your art is so beautiful and you are so incredibly talented!!! I hope to get to know you in the future🧡💛

@alexiaugustin here she is!!! the queen of good opinions!!! you are such a smart cookie and you use that power to make long paragraph posts that I can actually read without falling asleep. which is impressive honestly. never has a person been so kind and funny and genius in such a well rounded way (that makes no sense) I’m so happy that I have you in my life ilyyy💚💗

@ijntba hihi you’re such a sweet person and I literally love your skam blog sm. I am so honored that you’re using one of my icons you have no idea. even though I’m confused when you post about anime, I still appreciate your passion lmao. mwah💛🧡

@hidden-joy liz!! you are such a kind soul and I absolutely love looking at the things you reblog and reading all the nice things that you put in the tags, it’s always so sweet and supportive!!! we’re relatively new mutuals, but I do hope to get to know you better in the future!!!💚💛

okay sorry to group y’all together but @fudgetunblr and @alexiswoke I like just became mutuals with y’all but I do love you and I’m glad you’re here and I hope 2021 treats you well and that i get to know you better!!❤️❤️

aaand one last final message for max and sarah, i know yall wont see this but ily🧡 💜

okay yeah I know I already said this but I really do love each and every one of you so much and I am so lucky to have so many amazing people in my life💕💕💓💕💖💖💕💘💕💗💞💓💕💖💖💘💕💓

#MWAH💕#my mutuals are pretty fuckin rad #also don’t tell anyone but the hearts at the end are the colors I associate you with #or they’re as close as I could get #*makes this post*#*goes back to sleep*

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mego42 · 4 years ago

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I 100% agree about wanting more fanfic lists! I honestly think it's the best way to get a variety. Everybody has personal preferences, if someone, who mostly reads long, fluffy au Brio fic, is making recs, they're not likely to mention short, angsty, canon Brio (which is understandable and fair!) so ideally someone else, who does like those, would also do recs. I'm pretty sure I've read or at least tried the vast majority of Brio fics, but the recs often make me re-read the fic and author.

YAAASSSS!!! I mean like, okay, I v much get why people have issues with rec lists, and I def do not by any stretch endorse the idea that recs/rec lists should be considered anything other than one person sharing a think they liked, but to me a lot of the issues (the same fics/authors getting recced, feeling like awesome fics/authors are going unrecognized) can be solved by more reccing, not less. everyone’s got different taste and different stuff they look/read for and I am extremely pro sharing that.

Idk, I think about it like this: in a previous internet life I was a YA book blogger and I lived and died by recs from other bloggers whose taste and preferences I knew. I mean, you know, I’d check out a book bc the premise sounded interesting but literally the first thing I would do was go to Goodreads and look for a handful of people who tended to like the same books I did and see what they were saying about it bc that was the best way to get a good idea of if I wanted to give it a shot. Or, on the flip side, there were some people whose reviews I followed bc I knew we v much did not read for the same things so if they hated a book for X, Y and Z reasons, I was probs going to like it (one thing about book blogging is if you want to keep current, you do not have a lot of time to mess around, snap judgements are key but that’s a whole other thing and idk if it’s even relevant anymore bc that landscape has changed so much).

ANYWAY, the point is, I got in the habit and now I do the same thing with fic bc, tbh, I don’t have a ton of time to read, esp not when I’m actively writing which, with the exception of the last week or two, I’ve been doing p non-stop since I got here. All of which to say is, I am desperately in favor of fic recs for purely selfish reasons, I need them! Give them to me!!! Please!!!!!

That said, I uh, am v bad at returning the favor and I recognize that (I think I’ve made what? two rec lists for this fandom?) so I will try to do better to live by my own, idek what this is, moving on and here are 10 recs not really thematically linked by anything other than I’ve read them and loved them and don’t think I’ve put any of them on one of my rec lists yet (and if I have, my blog is a trainwreck I cannot be expected to remember what’s on it LET ME LIVE):

The Goodest Boy by EnsignDisaster

There’s a key turning in the lock and Buddy rushes over to greet his Master excited for her to meet his new friends. The door opens and he dances around Master’s feet rejoicing on the fact that she’s made it home. It's been literally forever.

“Hey Buddy what’s wrong? Need to go potty? Need to pee-pee?”

“Nah he’s good we took him out.”

Master does something very unMasterlike, she drops all the food she’d brought in on the ground and screams. It’s a non traditional avant garde type of hello…Buddy loves it. Mostly because while Master taps furiously on her small light box and sits tense in the corner opposite his new friend Buddy can lick up the egg smashed on the hardwood floor.

Buddy! The! Dog! POV! no further explanation necessary. Technically WIP, but it covers the whole pilot in a way that could be read as standalone (THOUGH THAT WOULD V MUCH GIVE ME A SAD though, when did the show forget the Bolands had a dog? so maybe that’s a tragic casualty of canon, idk)

May The Moon’s Silvery Beams by @pynkhues

Emma hums in agreement, and Rio turns her around to sit her on the counter, grabbing one of the older looking boxes of muesli while she kicks her legs out, heels bumping back against the counter, watching him. He gropes around the inside of the box, finally just opting to pull the plastic cereal bag out and peering inside. He can’t quite keep the grin off his face when he sees the wad of cash lining the bottom. This woman kills him, she really does.

Then there’s a little face peering up beside him, trying to peek into the box.

“What is it?” she asks, and he tilts the box sideways so she can see inside.

The upside to not getting here until s3 is that old fic is new to me! Huzzah!! Idk how many of y’all have already read this on but if you haven’t I highkey recommend. Extremely cute take on what if Emma woke up when Rio and came by to collect his/Beth’s/whoever's money during the shutdown. Cannot believe I’m reccing kidfic. Witchcraft!!!!!!

Maybe You’re My Fantasy by ohmisterjapan

He fucking loves the involuntary. It speaks to how he likes to unlock chaos and walk away. He's been called a control freak before and it felt like such a misunderstanding of him - he's all about self control but he doesn't want to control others. It's more that he enjoys revealing to them how little they can control themselves. It's more that he likes to stand still in the eye of someone else's storm and pick coldly through the wreckage.

Another oldie but a goodie. This fic is more like an extended character study (first chapter Rio POV, second chapter Beth) and I LIVE FOR THIS KIND OF SHIT. I really really really love the take on both characters, it really digs in and pulls out some nuances that made me sit and think about my own read of them and I love it.

A Shock Of Blue by mintletters16

“You don’t look very well. Would you… like me to get you a glass of water or something?”

Her voice is low but smooth, laced with a softness that cuts straight though to his core. Strawberry blonde locks fall gently just above the pair of magnets freezing him in place.

He can still feel the chaos tearing through his veins - emanating from the gold plated gun stuffed in his waistband - and suddenly he can’t be here anymore. Can’t meet this wide-eyed gaze that’s been locked on his for the past God-knows-how-long anymore.

Can’t see blue alive and concerned when he just left it cold and void somewhere in oblivion.

She’s looking at him like he’s on the brink of madness. He thinks maybe he is.

Apparently, it’s backlist rec day over here and I’m not sorry. This one is another technical WIP but the chapter works as a standalone (BUT if the author decided to return to it I WOULD NOT BE MAD). It’s a what if Beth and Rio met pre-canon and it works so!!! well!!!! The tension and fascination and build are all *chef’s kiss* plus the writing is gorgeous and lyrical and ugh, I love it.

for a moment we were strangers by openhearts

“We got stuff,” Rio motions with a nod to the backpack Beth hadn’t noticed when they arrived hanging on the back of one of the chairs at the island.

She swallows and turns back to the dishes, realizing Rio apparently means to sleep there , assuming the place isn’t bugged. Or for some kind of cover story if it is. She turns and fixes Rio with a narrow-eyed stare, studying his face, the corner of his jaw especially prominent from the angle she’s looking up at him. He’s methodical about drying each dish and setting it back on the rack, maddeningly ignoring her hard stare, so when he goes to take the next plate from her hands she grips it tightly and gets his attention.

“Hey.”

“What you on about now?” he asks, irritated.

It gets her gut uneasy, how he’s just . . . there, settling in, in ways he never had before, no matter how nonchalantly he would let himself in through her locked doors.

“This is,” Beth tries, failing, to find words for it, “. . . it’s weird .”

This one takes place post 204 and Rio and Marcus end up spending a long weekend staying with Beth and Emma for reasons (that work, for the record, I’m just not trying to summarize rn) and it’s domestic and cute but honestly my fav part of it is how weirded out Beth is by how easily they slip into sync. The story does an excellent job balancing where they are in canon (uneasy post-sex truce) with a snapshot of what they could be if they got over themselves (HA! as if) and Beth is DEEPLY FREAKED which makes her slow slide into realizing she could maybe sort of kind of oh shit like it/him??? that much more satisfying.

Not So Careful by @bensonstablers

When he doesn’t answer, her eyes go to his but he’s too busy watching the letter opener which is still pressed against the back of his hand. Curiously, Beth runs it up his arm, careful not to press too hard, and smiles a little as he shivers. Pulling her leg up onto the bed, she shuffles closer to him before pressing the tip of the sword to his chest and slowly circling his left nipple with it, being sure not to get too close.

“You ain’t gotta be that careful.”

And when she lifts her eyes to meet his, he’s got that look. The one that always makes a lump form in her throat and for her to fall back into bed with him without a single thought of what they have to do that day. Only thing is, this time they’ve got nothing to do for the rest of the weekend and well, staying in bed the entire time had seemed like an appealing idea so she allows herself to give in a little to that look.

It makes me EXTREMELY SAD that knifeplay ranked so low on the kink survey so I’m gonna need y’all to check out this V V V EXCELLENT example of it and come back and tell me you’re sorry and you voted wrong. I am v reasonable what are you talking about.

love (where it wasn’t supposed to be) by @lilliloves

"You know what I can't stand?" Rio asks, stepping closer. It's a rhetorical question but he pauses for a second and watches Dean sniff, watches a bead of sweat trickle down his forehead, watches him shift on both his feet as he contemplates making a run for it.

"A guy who don’t realize how good he's got it." Rio continues, looking Dean up and down in disgust. "A guy that will literally fuck up a good thing just to get his dick wet."

"Yeah, well I can't stand a guy who can have anyone he wants but chooses the married woman he's not entitled to.” Dean shoots back. "And I really can't stand the fact that you're always in the room with us even when you aren't there."

And who brings him into the room Dean hmmmmm????? Jk, jk (or am I). In this one Rio catches Dean out on the town with another woman (bc of course he is) and tries to call him out but whoops! gets called out himself. I really love the like, idk, undercurrent of wistful regret in this fic. I love Dean straight up calling Rio out on his feelings (spoilers but there’s an exchange right after this one that made me straight up holler), and, you know, obvs I am here for Rio making Dean feel like an ass.

Hell Is Other People by makemanybraver

Rio: We're in Hell, Elizabeth! If you don't think you belong here, then repent! Don't fuck everyone in the room in hopes that you get to go out!

Beth: Why do I have to repent?!

Rio: Because you did some fucked up shit in your life, Elizabeth! You keep doing fucked up shit here, too! And you think you don't belong here!

Beth [screaming at the top of her lungs]: Because I don't!

This fic is existentially bonkers and I love it. It’s the kind of experimental format/homage/what have you kind of thing that I L O V E. Based on No Exit by Jean-Paul Sartre, Beth, Rio, and Fitzpatrick are stuck together in a room in hell for all eternity. What more do you need, honestly.

Working On Things by odenkirk

Unknown Hold up, Elizabeth. I'm really thinkin about you here.

Beth turned her face into the pillow, effectively suffocating herself for a moment, but thinking it was a good trade off for the way the cool silk of her pillowcase chilled her skin.

She lifted her head to glance at the still sleeping Dean before replying.

Beth I'm thinking about you too. But this can't happen.

She wanted him to know she wanted him, but she also thought that admitting she was already there would save Rio from trying to convince her. She wanted him, but morals had to win just once in a while.

YES this is technically Beth/Dean while also being Beth/Rio BUT it’s also sort of Rio/Dean and I am HERE FOR THE DIVERSITY OF SHIPPING leave me alone who asked you.

Five Times He Knew What She Was Thinking, and One Time He Didn't by JoeyLee

Aight, so tell ‘em I was hittin’ it. Said deliberately blunt, eyes locked on her face the whole time, just to see those blue eyes widen. She looked so shocked that he almost laughed, so he softened it teasingly just to keep her going. Oh, I’m sorry, sweetheart, tell ‘em we were makin’ love.

Then he just watched her, just watched her face, just fucking fascinated. Her lips were parted and her eyes were big as saucers, and…there it was. Before she could look away flustered, he watched the thought go through her mind. Him and her together.

He wondered what she was picturing or where. Them in the back seat, her bed, a motel? Her on top or him from behind or his face between her legs?

Whatever it was, the blush started immediately, and he watched it bloom out from her cheeks to her hair. Then she was tearing her eyes away to gulp a little. But it didn’t knock her down for long before she was looking back. And then, wait, was she actually asking him how to go about telling a fed they were fucking?

Okay this is another technical WIP but works as a standalone. I am absolutely fucking feral for character POV takes of canon scenes and this is a supremely excellent take on Rio POV of some notable scenes from the pilot through 204. Imo it brilliantly captures Rio’s voice and I love it a lot.

HEADS UP I am absolute shite at tracking ao3 to tumblr unless people have specifically told me someone’s ao3/tumblr name SO if you recognize any of the non-tumblr authors on please lmk so I can tag them and YES I recognize that I am asking y’all to do things for me throughout this entire post and I’M SORRY OKAY I’M A WHOLE ASS MESS LOVE YOU BYE

#brio fic #brio fanfiction #good girls fanfiction #fic recs #anon #asks #gg disk horse #i feel like i had jokes i wanted to make in the tags but now that im here i've totally forgotten them #ANYWAY the important takeaway here is #tell me what you like and why i want to know okay #send me recs #ME ME ME #hahahahaha jk #sort of

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meta-shadowsong · 4 years ago

Text

Quick response to Mandalorian season finale

Behind a cut because, well.

Okay, yes, I am in this show for Dadalorian and Found Family etc. But I am at least as invested in the plotline this season about various factions of Mandalorians and their, for lack of a better word, sectarian disputes. Which frequently result in barfights. Because Mandalorians.

(AKA that scene where they picked up Bo and her minion was. A Delight.)

(Also, I love my girl Bo-Katan. Even if she’s very much a blunt instrument/not a politician going at this in all the wrong ways and was Very Rude to Boba but tbh I wasn’t 100% sure she was going to show up in this episode and I would’ve been Sad if we hadn’t gotten to see them meet. Either here or next season.)

(Still Sad at the lack of Sabine, though :( )

Leaving aside anything re: Gina Caranno (because that has been discussed by people much smarter and better-informed than myself), I’m kind of thrilled that the strike team was Almost Entirely Ladies.

(On that note. Uh. Does anyone else kinda. That little “Anyone else, we can take” smirk. And I just. Uh. Bo/Fennec, anyone??????)

(I kind of already ship Bo with Ventress tbh but a) multishipping ftw and b) threesome??????)

(Hi I’m shallow sometimes lol)

Anyway moving on.

Also the sound/almost-music when the Cylons Dark Troopers were activating was Excellent I approve.

And that Visual of the one trooper Din set on fire. ...honestly that whole hallway fight sequence was pretty Brilliant.

And the sort of...almost casual layer of the scene in the elevator. Even if these women haven’t worked together before, just that, “sure you don’t need any help with that?” “I got it. Excuse me.”

And that whole thing where Gideon was trying to Manipulate Din and he was like “...dude, I legit just care about the kid. I’ll fight for/with Bo-Katan because she’s pretty badass and I Might As Well plus she gets me what I want but I don’t...actually...Care about her Greater Cause?”

(Side note, I’ve spent a lot of time writing Bo-Katan/figuring out how her head works and literally all she cares about is Mandalore and its survival. It’s why she broke away from her sister in the first place, and has informed every single thing she’s done since. A lot of why she makes the specific choices she does goes back to the Mandalorian Civil War and her experiences there--especially since all the evidence indicates she was not with Satine and Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon. The way that separation and their different experiences of that conflict probably contributed to the eventual destruction of what seems likely to have been a Very Close Relationship before that is fascinating to me. And the subject of a fic I’ve been working on off and on for a couple years now, lol.)

(...anyway, where I was going with this was--I mean, yes, Gideon knows everything in terms of facts, but he doesn’t always interpret them correctly. IMO, Bo-Katan’s desire to rule Mandalore is less about power (for herself) than it is about Mandalore. Especially given some of what she says to Sabine in Rebels--if there was someone else she genuinely trusted to take the throne and rule her world, she’d be willing to cede her claim and be one of their generals. Especially since she’s very much not a political animal. She’s an excellent war leader, but not so much in terms of actual Governance.)

(insert long ramble about the Parallels between her and Anakin, which I touched on in one of my fanfics, lol; and will probably do more with in my BB project which involves the two of them and Padme as the main characters)

(And, yeah, she does want to fight Din for the right, but if she thought Din would be a good Duke/King of Mandalore, I think she would seriously considering swearing allegiance to him? Again, witness how she handled things with Sabine. Also she would probs prefer to avoid a third (fourth?) civil war in her lifetime. But, I mean. I love Din but he is. He is not a Leader. Not like her people need.)

(And I think the way things played out with Sabine affects her decisions here, too--she did accept the Darksaber as a gift/tribute then, but proceeded to lose it. Maybe she does need to fight for it the way Maul and Viszla did (presumably; we don’t know how he got the Darksaber; it may be something he inherited/have been held by House Viszla for a while, even if they never used it to dethrone the Kryzes until now).)

(But, then again, I mean, this has been her life for at least a decade, so...well, maybe she wouldn’t quite step aside. Even if an Absolutely Perfect candidate came along. But WRT Din specifically--given who he is and what he’s capable of, while she absolutely wants him in her camp (and on a personal level isn’t super thrilled about having to fight him like this; she seems to genuinely like this kid), my guess is she doesn’t want him ruling. Not without some more actual leadership training/experience. Because, well, he’s been either a follower or a loner in everything we’ve seen him in, and given Bo’s opinion of (possibly experience with?) the Watch/the group who raised him, and the fact that he’s consistently shown himself to have super-narrow priorities and not really caring about much outside of them...yeah, she probs has some Concerns.)

(Plus, he clearly doesn’t want it. And you have to Want It on some level in order to be an effective ruler--that Wanting can be from genuine altruism/wanting to make the world better, like we see with Bail and Padme; it can be from single-minded determination to Make Things Right, like Satine and I would argue Bo-Katan (Leia falls into either the first or second category, depending on the point in her storyline); and it can come from a desire for personal power and advancement (as we see with Pre Viszla and, of course, Skeev Palpatine himself; to be fair, rulers in this third category tend to be bad in other ways lol). But someone who genuinely doesn’t want power generally kind of Sucks when they’re unexpectedly handed it. Which I could cite several IRL historical examples of. And, I mean, obviously, this isn’t the only factor in play for what makes a good ruler/leader (see above re: Palps and Pre Viszla), but it is a factor.)

(Also, to clarify: none of these are bad qualities/traits, necessarily? Like, traits are good or bad depending on whatever context a person/character finds themself in. And in Din’s current context, with his current life and mission--even in situations where he has to coordinate with other groups in the service of a larger goal--these are excellent traits to have. But for someone who’s responsible for an entire nation? Not so much.)

(One could argue that Bo has some Issues there, too, albeit different ones, which is why I think she might be willing to step aside and cede her claim to a Genuinely Good/Better Alternative, if she found one. She’s a war-leader, not a ruler, and the two jobs require overlapping but different skillsets.)

(..........honestly? I don’t think the show would go there, but I think the two of them as a team/partnership ruling Mandalore would actually be really effective? Either on an equal footing or with one as the Official Ruler and the other as a second-in-command/right-hand. She has the leadership expertise and the actual will and drive to pull this off, and he has the diplomatic skill, as we see with the Tusken Raiders, among others.)

(Not a romantic partnership, lol, that would be Weird, but a political and probably eventually platonically affectionate one. Especially with how Mandalore feels about family of choice/adoption, and the fact that they’re both kind of alone now (whatever happened to Korkie, anyway??) even if no formal adoption is likely in their case...)

(Anyway. Uh. Long tangent aside...)

(also if there’s anyone who didn’t see Gideon trying to decapitate Din when his back was turned...IDEK what you were expecting. Like. I am All About guys like Pellaeon in the Imperial ranks, and the fact that there might be a few people who would make that offer/deal and be on the level. To say nothing of my best beloved Alexsandr Kallus. But. Uh. Gideon is. Not one of them.)

(Also, I thought it was a Nice Touch when the spear started turning red--because, no, the Darksaber can’t cut pure beskar. But it does generate heat, as we’ve seen in, say, TPM. And beskar does melt.)

Also, called it on tossing the Cylons Dark Troopers out the airlock Not Working in the long term.

While it’s not Cool or Flashy like a bomb or slicing, the Cylons Dark Troopers pounding the doors down with their goddamn fists was Cool and Terrifying in all the best ways.

Side note--I think even if I hadn’t been spoiled (forgot to mute the spoiler channels on the SW Discords I’m on before going to bed, and checked on autopilot), X-wing + Grogu perking up would’ve probably clued me in and I would’ve been SHRIEKING. I was still vibrating super hard even though I knew who was coming, but it probably would’ve been slightly more XD

(and then a moment of HAHA GIDEON KNOWS WHAT’S COMING)

(and so does my girl Bo)

(and then the green ‘saber and the glove and other costume details and IF YA DIDN’T SCREAM BEFORE YOU SURE ARE NOW!!!!)

(Kind of cool that they waited until the last minute before showing his actual face though)

NO MY GIRL BO-KATAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(IF YOU DIE WHO WILL GET DRUNK AND SWAP WAR STORIES AND MAYBE HAVE VICTORY SEX WITH FENNEC)

(shut up i’m shallow)

(also I love her she’s legit one of my favorite characters in this series I don’t want her to die DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD:)

OH GOOD SHE GOT UP

(yeah that was my actual real-time reaction to her getting shot lol)

“Talent without training is nothing.” ::insert Obvious/Tired joke about Luke having all of three months’ training At Best::

(also, I mentioned this in my last quick reaction, as well as elsewhere, but I’m...still kind of uncomfortable with the continuing implication that the Jedi path is the only option other than Darkness. Not because it’s a bad one, either in the PT-era or with Luke’s reconstruction. But the idea that the only way to achieve the mindset/emotional stability/whatever needed to wield the Force without Falling is through adapting the Jedi philosophy sits wrong with me. especially the implication that you can only do so from an early age/in isolation from other influences or bonds; which is a word I’m using very specifically because there’s a difference between Attachment as defined by the Jedi and interpersonal bonds which they clearly have and I don’t want this to get derailed by that particular Discourse(tm) That doesn’t even super hold up on Earth, with a single species, let alone in a galaxy with trillions of beings of multiple different species. Basically, people and the galaxy--and by extension the Force, which is in part created/influenced by living beings--are way too complicated for there to be only one right answer.)

(Also, it...doesn’t really hold up with the core message of Star Wars, which is about Choice? If the only way you can be a Good Force Adept is by meeting this extremely narrow set of criteria, most of which are outside your possible control......but I should probably save this for a separate post, lol.)

(The point is, I mentioned earlier in the post how much I’m LOVING the throughline in this season about different factions/sects among Mandalorians, and I think it would be Great if we got more of that with Jedi/Light adepts.)

(Anyway. Uh. Back to the episode...)

That FACE MOMENT had me legit crying omg

ARTOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1!@@21!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

omg had they MET

I...don’t know what I was expecting from the credits but Welp. I wonder who the body double was...

(And before you ask, I didn’t really get the Uncanny Valley effect from Rogue One, not even Tarkin, so.....yeah, I guess I don’t always pick up on that, or it hits me from weird directions, lol. Because I sometimes get that from the Rebels animation, especially in stills/gifsets, because everyone’s faces are all so Smooth...)

.........Jabba’s palace, okay.

.......Bib Fortuna, Okay.

(those fingernails, however, are Not Okay)

YAY RESCUE THE GIRL.

Good on you, Boba, just shooting him in the face instead of letting him posture!

although why you want to rule Tatooine is...okay then.

LOL at Fennec perching on the arm of the chair, sipping her booze all casual-like.

Right! So that was an Experience! Overall, I liked it. Looking forward to how Din and Bo handle things moving forward, in particular! Because, like I said, I’m in this series for Dadalorian (so IDK how I’ll feel with it no longer being the Core Story since Grogu left with Luke) and in this season for the Mandalorian factions/sects and how they interact.

I’m also not sure how I feel about three interconnected series leading up to a Major Finale Event? Disney’s Star Wars has not had a super great track record with giving all the information needed to follow things in the core product (see: the ST worldbuilding lol, and also some of the cameos/appearances in this season, even), so I’m Skeptical of how well they’ll do explaining what is Necessary in each of the three series, in case someone only watches one or two.

What were your thoughts?

#fandom #star wars #originally posted december 2020

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moodyvalentinestories · 5 years ago

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Direction – One | Hunt x HWU MC (Danielle)

Summary: Hunt finds out what the 'stick' is, and it's not pretty. Danielle is worried.

Words: 1500+

Notes: Hunt worrying he can't direct anymore is honestly me right now with writing. Like, I haven't done it in a few months, and I'm like??? Is this how you do a write? Is this right? Idek anymore!

❥ Masterlist

Thomas didn’t hear from Danielle or anyone else associated with her film for three days and, consequently, almost forgot about the interaction altogether. But there was that one small remark she’d made, about the Silver Circle, that stuck with him. It had been two years, and it wasn’t like he never wanted to go back to directing. He did, but there was that fear of failure – what if he didn’t have what it takes anymore? What if he couldn’t do his job as he could before?

And, of course, there was also that small matter of finding the perfect project. He’d been looking at several scripts a while ago, but nothing had seemed… right for him. So he’d postponed, and postponed, and postponed – and the more time passed, the more his fear had grown.

Perhaps he should speak to Holly Chang, she might have something in the works. Then again, if he recalled correctly, she’d been hired for another project a few months ago, and was likely too busy to create another masterpiece.

No, he wasn’t going to find what was right for him now. And, in any case, it wasn’t like he had the time for creating a film before the next semester started. Unless, of course, he didn’t create it from scratch. If there was already a script, and a cast, and he’d only have to give up some creative control… no. Absolutely not. He was not, not even for a second, going to consider Danielle’s proposal.

But it hadn’t been a proposal, had it? She’d acted as if it was already set in stone. You are going to take over his job, she’d said. She hadn’t asked him if he would do it, nor had she presented it in any way that implied he had a choice. He’d thought it was just her way of trying to persuade him – make him think he couldn’t say no – but on the fifth day after their conversation, he was proven wrong.

It was a crisp white envelope that day, with no address on it but simply his name. He took it out of the mailbox and placed it on his kitchen counter, wondering if opening it was a good idea. He knew it wasn’t. So he didn’t touch it for several hours, in fact, he forgot about it until he went to get a glass of Scotch that night. And so when he returned to the lounge with his tumbler, he took the envelope with him as well.

It sat on the coffee table for another hour so, while he read over a script a former student of his had sent him, and his eyes kept wandering to that cursed piece of paper. And so, eventually, he couldn’t take it anymore and opened it. He immediately regretted that decision.

Thomas didn’t think he would ever be blackmailed again. After all, he hadn’t done anything he could be blackmailed with. But the single picture that had been in that envelope certainly looked like he had done something. And it didn’t much matter whether it was taken out of context or not; not to the press. Especially not considering who the other person in the photo was. While many would likely agree that it didn’t seem much like Thomas, the same could not be said of Danielle. There were few things people – including Thomas – would put past her. Being in a secret relationship with a professor was not one of them.

“Damn you,” Thomas murmured as he stared at the photograph in his hands. “I told you, it could never be just a dance.”

He looked at the picture of him and Danielle dancing just a little too intimately at her first Fairytale Kingdom Formal for another moment, before turning it around. There were three words written on it, followed by a set of initials.

Don’t test me. – V.M.

Thomas was glad he’d put down the glass of Scotch earlier because he was convinced he would have thrown it across the room otherwise. Of course. Of course Danielle would work for Montmartre. She never learnt, did she? She’d been burnt a million times before and, still, she would choose to work for a snake such as him.

Then again, she didn’t know him. And being cast in a film that was expected to be extremely successful must have been quite tempting. As much as Thomas would have hoped she’d know better, as much as he would have hoped he’d taught her to know better, he couldn’t blame her.

What he could blame her for, however, was telling someone that this photo existed. Because Thomas knew for a fact that it had never surfaced before, and that the only person who could have possibly known about it that was at all associated with this project, was Danielle. And, oh, she would pay for that.

But the picture was out there now, and if there was one thing he was sure of, it was that Viktor Montmartre would not back down until he got what he wanted. And since Thomas had nothing on him whatsoever – not yet, anyway – he would have to play along. For now.

He had received the first letter. Danielle knew this because she was sitting in her car, just down the street from where Hunt lived and had just seen one of Viktor’s men drive by. She considered taking it out of his mailbox before he could find it but knew it wouldn’t have changed anything. Viktor had the pictures now. He had all the so-called proof he needed. It didn’t matter that what it was supposed to prove never even happened. The photos were all real, and it didn’t look good for her. It looked even worse for Hunt.

Maybe she should have told him when she’d gone to talk to him. Maybe she shouldn’t have waited for Viktor to take action. But how was she supposed to tell him that she may have accidentally ruined his entire life? She’d been too scared to bring it up. Terrified, really. And now it was too late.

Not long after the letter had been delivered, Hunt had come out of the house to collect his mail. But Danielle did not receive an angry text, or a call, within an hour of him going back inside. She would have expected one. Though, maybe, he simply didn’t think her number would still be the same. So she checked her e-mail. Nothing.

It seemed strange to her that Hunt wouldn’t immediately contact her. After all, he must have known that nobody but her would have known about the pictures. She wondered which ones had been in the envelope.

Had Viktor gone straight for the one from after the Fairytale Kingdom Formal, in which she had stupidly kissed his cheek, and it had looked like she had actually kissed him? Or had he chosen the one in which they were just dancing? That one would have been only marginally better, since they were holding each other quite closely, but at least it wasn’t ostensibly a kiss. Or maybe it was the one from Sundance. That one was the least terrible, and it had even been printed before, but in combination with the others – suffice it to say, it would no longer simply look like a professor who was proud of his student.

She should have listened to him when he’d said he wouldn’t dance with her. She should have listened to him when he’d taught her to always be wary of the people she did business with. But she was stupid, and she always thought she knew better, even when experience told her otherwise. In the end, Hunt had always been right.

Danielle checked her e-mail once again – still nothing – before she finally decided to drive off.

The call she’d expected finally came around a quarter to three in the morning. She was still awake, trying to distract herself by finally watching that show Addison had recommended to her so many times. Now that she was trying not to think of reality seemed the perfect time to get lost in a world of dragons and faeries… nonetheless, the second her phone rang, Danielle slammed her laptop shut and reached for her phone.

She didn’t want to answer. But she knew that she would have to face him eventually. So she picked up and immediately said, “I know. I’ll text you the address.”

“No need,” came Hunt’s voice from the other end of the line, just before her doorbell rang. “You should consider finding better friends. It’s quite concerning how willingly they give out your information.”

Danielle groaned as she made her way to the door. Of course he would already be there. He was Thomas Hunt, after all. “If Ethan gave you my address, it’s because he knows you, Hunt. Hold on, I’ll buzz you in.” She stopped short of the button, hesitating for a moment. “You didn’t bring any sort of weapon, did you?”

“Don’t be ridiculous. If I wanted you dead, I’d have hired someone,” he said before hanging up.

“Well, that’s reassuring,” Danielle murmured before pressing the button to let him inside. She wasn’t entirely sure if Hunt was joking or not, but at least she knew she wouldn’t die tonight.

Tags: @lilyoffandoms @trappedinfandoms @flyawayboo @oneemofungirl @alleksa16 @silversparrow02 @i-bloody-love-drake-walker @alj4890

#hwu #hwu hunt #thomas hunt #professor hunt #danielle

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dylshoney · 6 years ago

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college boy

request: can you please do a college imagine where you meet shawn in a lecture?!?!!?! i literally love you! thanks :)

a/n: idek what this is - hope you like it anon:) i love you more! this is longer than it should be. college!shawn owns my ass, thank you. this is the first part of a two-part mini-series!

please check out the mood board for this fic here (made by the lovely @kidsiinlove )

warnings: language, drinking, frat -boy shawn (Jesus take the whole damn car)

You huffed, checking the time on your phone – your 8am class was starting in two minutes and it would take you at least five to get to your lecture hall.

It was your first class of the second semester and you were heavily regretting choosing the earliest possible one, but it was the only thing that fit with your schedule so you had to make do.

Moments later you sprinted into the lecture hall, your hair wild and your cheeks hot as you looked around, searching for somewhere to sit. You had hoped your entrance would be unnoticeable – but everyone had turned to watch you enter. You ducked your head and speed – walked up the steps, noticing an empty aisle seat.

His head snapped up at the sound of your voice, his eyes widening as they landed on you, quickly shaking his head as he noticed your expectant expression.

You released a breath of relief, nodding at him and sinking into the seat, “Thank you.”

He hummed, his eyes not leaving you as he extended his hand, “ ’m Shawn.”

You bit your lip, taking his hand and shaking it slightly, “Y/n.”

He smiled, turning away from you to face the front.

You didn’t speak for the rest of the lecture, the two of you far too busy with taking notes and trying to pay attention to the professor that was talking way too fast for your liking.

“How was intro to philosophy?” Carrie snorted, walking into your dorm, seeing you sprawled out on your bed.

You grumbled, rolling over so that you could see her grinning face, “So great. I can’t wait to fucking fail it!”

She laughed, throwing her head back, “It can’t be that bad.”

You shrugged, moving over so she could sit next to you, “Everyone seemed to know what was going on except me.”

“Can you ask someone to help you?”

You lay back, staring up at the ceiling, “It’s the first lesson – I don’t want to seem like a complete idiot.”

“You won’t,” she lay next to you, “Have you met anyone you could ask?”

“Uh – this one dude,” you hummed, “Shawn, I think?”

She shot up faster than you could blink, “Shawn? Shawn Mendes?”

You sat up as well, tilting your head in confusion, “No idea. Why?”

“Y/n!” She hit your arm, “Hello? Shawn Mendes? Literally the hottest guy on campus, he’s the captain of our hockey team?”

“Oh.” The realization hit you like a brick, you had heard of him. He was sort of a legend at your university, and now that you were thinking of it, he had been ridiculously attractive.

You hadn’t let yourself realize it before, your stress clouding your mind. But now, holy shit. You had sat next to Shawn Mendes.

“Well, now I’m definitely not asking him.”

“You so are,” she nodded her head eagerly, “And you’re also going to get us an invite to his frat’s party.”

You snorted, “There’s no way that’s happening. They never invite underclassmen. Plus – we’re not going to talk again.”

“What? Why not?”

“Because we’re probably not going to sit together,” you shrugged.

Carrie rolled her eyes, “Make sure you sit together.”

“I – ”

“Sit in the same place again and wait for him to sit next to you.”

“He won’t,” you shook your head, but your stomach subconsciously clenched at the thought.

She hummed, standing up with a confident look on her face, “We’ll see.”

Two days later, you were actually on time to the class, maybe even a little too early.

You pretended to be reading your previous notes, to not look too out of place, but your writing was practically unintelligible and none of it made any sense.

You heard someone clear their throat; your head snapping up at the sound, your eyes meeting warm golden ones.

Shawn smiled down at you, nodding his head at the seat next to you. You swallowed, looking down as you adjusted your legs to the side so that he could pass through.

“Thanks,” he said, his eyes not leaving you as he sat down.

You nodded, unable to form words as you looked down at your notebook again.

It was silent for a few seconds, until you saw him in the corner of your eye, leaning closer to you.

“That’s supposed to be Plato’s cave theory,” he hummed, looking over your messy words, “From ‘The Republic’.”

You blinked, a wave of embarrassment washing through you as you subtly tried to turn the notebook away from him, “Okay, thanks.”

He shrugged like it was no big deal, a small smile on his face, “No problem.”

You grabbed one of your pens, quickly correcting the mistakes, before taking a deep breath and looking back over at him.

“Do you maybe know who the main Stoics were? I missed it last lecture.”

He nodded, pulling out his notes and flipping through them before looking up at you expectedly.

You blinked before looking back down at your paper as he began to dictate the names, your messy script quickly jotting them down.

“Thank you,” you smiled as he finished, “Last class was honestly a blur for me.”

He chuckled at your words, your heart rate unexpectedly speeding up at the sound, “He talks too fast.”

You nodded, tilting your head slightly, “You didn’t seem to have a problem keeping up?”

“You were paying attention, eh?”

You flushed, looking down, shaking your head, “You have all the answers…”

“I’m messing with you,” he smiled, his eyes crinkling as he looked at you again, “I really like this class. I may have done some research outside of the lecture.”

It was your turn to laugh now, quickly covering your mouth as the people in front of you turned around in annoyance.

“What?” He grinned, “It’s interesting.”

“I’m glad you think so,” you caught your breath, your gaze catching his again, “If you could give me some tips on how I could trick myself into thinking the same, that’d be great.”

“You don’t think Diogenes’ principles are interesting?” He teased, making you roll your eyes dramatically.

“How could I forget?” You smiled, “I love bucket man.”

“Bucket?” His eyes shut as he laughed again, your ears sharpening at the pleasant sound, “It was a barrel. You really weren’t paying attention last lecture.”

“I was!” You huffed, crossing your arms, “It was confusing!”

“Why’d you sign up?” He asked, genuine confusion lacing his voice.

You shrugged, playing with the hem of your shirt, “I need the credit. It was either this or Ethics and Values perspectives, and I already took an intro to ethics class, so this was really the only choice.”

He nodded, “And you’re regretting it?”

“Not yet,” you said decidedly, “But I might if things keep going at this pace.”

He was silent for a moment, before clearing his throat, your gaze meeting his as he smiled again, “I could help you? If you want?”

“Really?” You coughed, trying to calm to squeakiness in your voice, “Really? I mean that’d be great, but I don’t want to be a burden.”

He was quick to shake his head, “You wouldn’t be. Plus it would help me brush up on my facts.”

“Thank you,” you couldn’t contain your wide grin.

“No problem,” he shrugged, acting like he didn’t just save your entire grade. He paused for a second, before handing you his phone, “So that we can plan where and when to meet.”

Your teeth dug into your bottom lip as you took the device into your hands, quickly adding your number while trying to calm your shaking hands.

You handed it back to him as you exchanged smiles before the entrance door slammed shut – bringing your attention to the professor that had walked inside.

He didn’t greet the class, instead immediately launched into a long summary of Stoicism, making you grumble as you tried to keep up.

You and Shawn didn’t speak for the entire lecture but kept exchanging exasperated glances at some of the topics discussed. The gorgeous boy even surprised you by raising his hand and answering two of the proposed questions.

Your hand hurt from trying to write, so you gave up halfway through the lecture, mostly copying down Shawn’s immaculate bullet points.

When the lecture was over, you were completely amazed to see that he waited for you to pack up your stuff, the two of you leaving the hall together.

“Was that better or worse than last time?” He asked, the two of you walking into the quad.

“Better.” You smiled, adjusting the strap of your bag, “It helped that you let me copy your notes, so thank you for that.”

“Anytime.”

“How is your writing so neat?” You asked before you could stop yourself.

He shrugged, “I haven’t really – ”

“Shawn!”

You stepped back as an excited dirty- blond boy ran over to you, his eyes trained on Shawn, “You won’t believe what happened!”

Shawn rolled his eyes teasingly, “You’re sort of interrupting something.”

“Oh,” the boy’s eyes trailed over to you, before flicking back to Shawn and smiling lightly as he extended a hand to you, “I’m Brian, nice to meet you.”

“Y/n,” you returned his grin as he vehemently shook your hand.

“How do you,” Brian gestured between you and Shawn, his eyes holding a teasing look, “How do you two know each other?”

Shawn cleared his throat, shooting him a dangerous glance, “We have philosophy together.”

Brian’s eyes widened in realization, “You’re the pre – ”

Shawn coughed, nudging him sharply – immediately silencing the overly excited boy who smiled knowingly, but you just watched the two in confusion.

“Are you coming to the party tonight?” Brian asked before Shawn could say anything, his blue eyes trained expectantly on you, “Cause you should.”

“Uh –,” you swallowed, your eyes glancing to Shawn, who didn’t seem too pleased with his friend.

You took that as a hint, brushing your hair behind your ear as you shrugged, “I don’t think –”

“Come on y/n,” Brian interrupted you, “You should come. I promise you won’t regret it.”

You couldn’t resist looking back at Shawn, his piercing eyes already trained on you. He seemed to snap out of his daze, stepping forward as he agreed with Brian, “You should.”

“I – ” you were prepared to decline again, but something about the look on his face made you nod, “Okay, sounds fun.”

“Perfect,” Brian smiled widely, “Shawn’ll text you the details. We’ll see you tonight!”

You didn’t have the chance to blink, before Brian had placed his hands on Shawn’s shoulders, spinning him around and beginning to guide him away.

Shawn seemed as shocked as you, his eyes wide as he turned back to you, nodding as a sign of farewell.

You couldn’t help but laugh, waving slightly as you watched the two boys begin bickering as they moved further away from you.

“Stop fidgeting,” Carrie giggled, moving your hair over your shoulder.

You rolled your eyes, looking over at her expectantly, “Me?”

She shrugged, smiling innocently as she laced your hands together, pulling you along the curb.

You had decided to walk to the party, not wanting to risk driving and then not having any parking – which seemed to be a reoccurring theme with frat parties.

Carrie had been bouncing ever since you told her the news, the two of you waiting in anticipation for the text, which you received just a couple hours after separating from Shawn.

Shawn: Hey, the address is 469 Alamoe drive, party starts at 10. Hope to see you there, y/n.

Carrie had screamed her head off. The fact that he had specifically typed your name somehow made her convinced that he was in love with you, but you knew better than to argue with her about these things. So you just stayed quiet and tried to remind her that it was probably a copy – pasted message that he sent to everyone.

“But then he wouldn’t have typed your name specifically,” she had said, which started the whole cycle again.

She seemed excited out of her mind to be attending an upperclassmen frat party, but you, on the other hand, were a little skeptical. You were positive that Shawn wouldn’t say a word to either of you and that you’d both be alone the entire time, before opting to leave early.

But you tried to stay positive, for Carrie’s sake at least.

Your heart clenched at you reached the obviously crowded house. There were people on the porch, cars lining the street and music pumping from inside.

“This is crazy.” Carrie seemed speechless for the first time all night, her hand clenching yours.

“Nervous?” You asked, noticing she had stopped walking, halting your movements as well.

Her eyes flickered back to the house before a small smile spread over her, “No. We’re here to have fun.”

You couldn’t help but grin back, “We drinking tonight?”

“A few jello shots maybe,” she shrugged, letting go of your hand and adjusting her top, “But we’re definitely not getting more than tipsy, we don’t know these people.”

You were so fucking thankful to have someone like her in your life.

“Agreed.” Your smile faded as you turned back to face the house, “Ready?”

“Always.”

The two of you walked through the front lawn, a few people that were familiar waving slightly as you passed by. You relaxed as your eyes locked on Lucas, a fellow sophomore and one of your friends.

“Luke!” You called, catching his attention, a wide smile spreading over him as he excused himself from the group he was talking to.

“Y/n!” His hands wrapped around you quickly, bringing you to his chest as a strong smell of beer filled your senses.

“What are you doing here?” He smiled, looking down at you, before his eyes shot to Carrie, “Hey C!”

“Hey,” she waved, but her eyes were trained on an arguing couple a few meters away from you.

You ignored them, turning back to Luke, “What are you doing here?”

“I’m on the hockey team,” he snorted.

“Oh.”

“And don’t avoid my question young lady, what are you doing in a place like this?”

His tone was teasing as he leaned closer to you, making you cross your arms, “I was invited actually.”

“By who?”

“Shawn,” you said, your face heating at just the mention of his name.

The smile was immediately wiped off his face, “Shawn Mendes?”

You nodded, tilting your head as he ran a hand through his hair, a telling sign that he was nervous.

“Are you sure it was Shawn?” He asked, his eyes intently trained on you.

“Yeah. Why are you being so weird?”

“Because Shawn never invites girls,” he shrugged, “Ever. I’ve known him for two years and he’s never shown interest in anyone, much less invited someone to the house.”

You didn’t know how to react to his words, trying to keep your face as impassive as possible, but in reality, you were freaking out – trying to put understand what he was saying.

“We have philosophy together,” you mumbled, “I think he invited me as a friend, in fact, Brian sort of made him invite me.”

This seemed to ease Luke, his shoulders slumping again, “In that case, I think you need to get a drink.”

“Alright,” you spun around, immediately locating Carrie, who was seated on one of the lawn chairs, in a heated conversation with the girl that had been fighting with her boyfriend. Your heart melted at the sight, Carrie was perfect for advice and helping people.

“C!” You got her attention, motioning to the door.

She smiled, giving you thumbs up, but nodded at the girl – indicating that she would stay outside a little longer.

You followed Luke through the crowd of people at the entrance, your fingers digging into his elbow as you tried to keep up, your wide eyes taking in every aspect of the frat house. It was definitely different than you imagined.

“What are you having?” Luke asked, guiding you to the large island in the middle of the kitchen.

“Smirnoff ice,” you grabbed a bottle out of the cooler on the floor and filled a solo cup about halfway.

“Not going hard tonight?” He laughed, pouring himself a mix of vodka and orange juice.

“Nope,” you shook your head, lightly bobbing it as a recognizable song came on.

“Smart.” He coughed, his eyes training on someone behind you.

You turned around, Brian’s smiling face looking down at you as he approached, “Y/n! You made it!”

“Hi!” You raised your hand, about to wave but he thrust his body into yours, enveloping you in a tight hug that made a surprised squeal bubble out of you.

He pulled away, his hands on your arms as he looked down at you seriously, “Shawn’s in the backyard.”

“Okay?” You nodded, unsure what you were supposed to do with the information.

“Well, what are you still doing here?” He nudged you toward the hallway, “Go!”

You laughed, your eyes catching Luke’s behind him, seeing him raise his cup as a sign of salute, “See you later!”

You waved, tightly gripping your cup as you tried to squeeze through the mess of bodies on the way. You finally reached the sliding glass doors leading to the outside, pulling them open and relishing as the fresh air filled your senses.

You found Shawn talking to one of his friends near the large fire pit. You hesitated in your steps as you watched him, his smile wide and eyes glowing as the fire reflected through them.

You saw him laugh at something his friend had said, his eyes shut as he threw his head back. You couldn’t resist but smile at the sight, there was something about his presence that made you unable to stay calm, your hands shaking lightly as you made your way over to them.

In a flash of confidence, you cleared your throat, “Hey.”

His eyes shot open, a flash of panic in them as his gaze traveled over your body, “Y/n! Hi!”

“Hi,” you repeated, anxiously chewing your bottom lip.

“Sit, please,” he moved to the side, gesturing to the seat next to him. You were quick to listen, plopping yourself down and looking at the boy across from you.

“I’m y/n.” You extended your hand, grasping his firmly.

He never stopped smiling, “Josiah. Nice to meet you.”

“You too,” you nodded, before your eyes flickered back to Shawn again, “I hope I wasn’t interrupting something.”

“Not at all,” Josiah smiled, “I was actually talking about how I desperately needed another refill.”

He stood, suddenly a lot taller than you expected, and wiped his pants quickly before looking down at you and Shawn, “I’ll be back soon.”

You smiled, nodding as he walked away, your heart dropping in your stomach as you looked back over at Shawn, to see him already staring intently at you.

“What’re you drinking?” You asked, trying to figure out what to say.

He smiled, raising his cup, “Water.”

“Water?” You leaned back, stunned.

He nodded, “Yeah. But don’t tell anyone, I have a reputation to uphold.”

You could resist the chuckles that burst out of you, “I would never do anything to hurt our school’s star player.”

“You’ve heard of me?” He raised his eyebrows, a small smirk on his face as he leaned back into the chair.

“Of course,” you swallowed, I practically stalked you before coming, “Everyone knows you.”

He hummed, his eyes falling back to the cup in his hands, “Have you ever been to a game?”

You nodded, “Yeah. Almost all of them.”

His head shot up at your words, “What? Really?”

“Mhmm. I have a friend on the team. Luke.”

“Who?” He tilted his head as he leaned forward onto his knees, his face was suddenly a lot closer than you were used to.

Your throat was dry as you look back at the fire pit for a moment, “Lucas.”

“Ohh..” He nodded, “He’s good.”

“Yeah, he is.”

“Are you going to the game next Friday?” He asked, making your gaze switch to him again as you shrugged.

“Not sure. I have a huge essay due the following Monday.”

“C’mon y/n,” He nudged your knee with his, “You have to come. It’s the biggest game of the season.”

You were both silent for a moment until he cleared his throat again, “Plus – now you know three people on the team.”

“Three?” You tilted your head, a teasing smile on your face, “Luke, Brian and Josiah?”

He straightened up sharply, a mocking look on his face, “You chose Josiah over me? You just met him.”

You laughed, nodding as he shook his head in disappointment.

“I offer to help you with understanding philosophy, and this is the thanks I get?” He tutted, “Maybe we should cancel the study session.”

You couldn’t help but laugh harder, placing your cup on a table next to you as you held your stomach, “Okay – maybe Josiah can help me?”

“How dare you?” He grumbled, crossing his arms and pouting as he fell back into his seat.

“I’m kidding,” you caught your breath, “I’m kidding. I wouldn’t want anyone else helping me.”

“Really?” He couldn’t control the small smile that began to form.

“Yeah,” you shrugged, “I mean who knows more about barrel man than the kid who willingly researched him for hours.”

“Hey! You’re making me sound like a nerd, I told you it was interesting!”

“That’s exactly something a nerd would say.” You shrugged, winking at him with a teasing glimmer in your eyes.

He huffed, “Well, the first order of business when we study, will be to get you to understand that philosophy can be fun.”

“If you manage to do that, I’ll do anything.” You snorted, shaking your head.

“Anything, eh?” He asked, sitting up again.

“Well, not anything, but – ”

“You’ll come to the game?” He asked, his eyes staring into yours with a certain intensity you hadn’t seen before.

You pondered his words for a moment before hesitantly dipping your head, “Yes, I’ll come to the game.”

“Perfect,” his smile was so wide you almost had to look away, “When do we start?”

You shrugged, “You’re the teacher, it’s up to you.”

“What about Thursday?”

“Thursday works.”

He winked at you, “Prepare to get your mind blown, y/n.”

You loved the way he said your name. It seemed more intimate somehow, your cheeks flushing again as you realized you had been staring at him for too long.

“Do you want to go for a walk?” He asked suddenly.

“A walk?” You looked around at the screaming people, not understanding why he would want to leave his own house, but nodded anyway, “Yeah, okay.”

He grinned at your words, practically shooting out of his seat and extending his hand to you, you hesitantly took it – letting his larger one engulf yours.

He led you through the house, motioning to Brian who smiled when he saw your connected hands, before taking you out the front door.

You weren’t surprised to see Carrie still seated on the front lawn, a drink in her hand and a group surrounding her as they laughed at something she was saying.

You smiled at Shawn before walking over to Carrie, getting her attention as she smiled up at you, “Y/n!”

“You good, C?” You smiled, steadying her lightly as she hopped up onto her feet. She grinned up at you, her smile so wide and electric that you couldn’t help but smile back.

“Why are you with Shawn?” She attempted to whisper, her excited eyes flickering back to the boy who was standing a little farther from you.

You pinched her hip, “Shush. We’re just going for a walk.”

“A walk hmm?” She started to giggle, covering to mouth to contain the squeals. She had obviously drunk more than you agreed on.

“I can stay here, or we can leave,” you tried to catch her eyes, “I feel like I shouldn’t leave you alone.”

“No!” She shook her head quickly, “No! Go with Shawn! Alisha will take care of me, right?” She turned to glance at the girl who was already nodding.

You stared at the redhead with narrowed eyes, but she just smiled in response, “Don’t worry – I got her, I haven’t had anything to drink. Go have fun.”

You blushed at the underlying tone in her voice, nodding lightly as you realized that Carrie was in capable hands.

“Call me if you need anything.” You placed your hands on her shoulders, gently massaging them.

“Okay! I promise,” she rolled her eyes, before grinning widely, “Now go!”

You sighed, your eyes traveling over her once –unsure if you were ready to leave her alone.

She shoved you gently, making you step back – smiling lightly as Shawn looked down at you.

“Be safe!” Carrie called once you started walking down the curb, “Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do!”

You snorted, covering your mouth as you shook your head at Shawn, “Sorry about that.”

“Don’t worry about it,” he nodded, stepping closer to you as you walked alongside him, “She a close friend of yours?”

“Yeah, my best friend actually. I’ve known her since high school.”

“Oh wow,” he looked over at you with wide eyes, “And you chose the same college?”

You nodded, “Yeah. It’s been a thing since we met– I can’t imagine life without her.”

“That’s how I am with Brian,” he said.

“How long have you been friends?”

“12 years.” He blinked, “Yeah. Twelve years.”

“Wow,” you smiled, “That’s crazy.”

You watched him for a second, his hand lightly grazing yours as you subconsciously leaned closer to him. You flinched away at the contact, your eyes looking forward again, widening as they saw where Shawn had led you.

“What are we doing at the football stadium?”

He smiled, stepping back before sprinting and hopping over the low fence, your mouth falling open in shock as you watched him.

“What the hell are you doing?” You spun around, trying to make sure no one was watching.

“I want to show you something,” he smiled, gesturing to you, “Come on.”

You hesitated for a second, your heart beating out of your chest before you ran over to the fence, and suspending yourself up – swinging your legs over the edge. Shawn was at your side before you could blink, grabbing your hips and gently placing you on your feet in front of him.

“Thanks,” you mumbled, feeling like your skin was burning as his thumb lightly grazed your lower stomach since your shirt had moved up during your jump.

You blinked, looking up at him – your cheeks immediately heating up as he stared down at you.

He seemed to snap out of his gaze, his hands quickly falling to his side, “Let’s go.”

You nodded, but he hadn’t seen it, already heading forward at an accelerating pace.

“Okay,” you mumbled to yourself, your legs speeding up as you followed him, “Hey! Slow down.”

He stopped moving, turning back to you with a sheepish smile, “Sorry.”

“Must be nice to have naturally long legs,” you teased, reaching him with a huff.

He shrugged, “Haven’t really thought about it.”

You weren’t listening however, your eyes trained on the bleachers he had led you to.

“Shawn.” You looked around nervously, the arena very creepy in the dark, “Are we allowed to be here?”

“Nope,” he shook his head casually, “If we get caught I’m pretty sure we’ll have to pay a fine. Maybe worse.”

You froze at his words, your mouth falling open, “What –”

“But we won’t get caught, don’t worry.”

You weren’t too convinced, “If we do, I’m going to say you drugged me and forced me here against my will.”

He laughed, a little too loud for someone that was breaking into university property, “Deal.”

He extended his hand to you, “Let’s go.”

You took his hand, letting him pull you up the metal steps, the two of you trying to make the least amount of noise as you ran up.

You had to run faster than him to keep up, making him practically drag you up the steps. You stumbled once, your leg getting caught on a step, making you fly forward as a small shriek left you.

“Shit!”

Shawn’s arms wrapped around you before you hit the floor, his hands gripping your body tightly as you tried to catch your breath.

Everything was still for a moment, neither of you moving, his hands still grasping you.

You swallowed, slightly dizzy as the adrenaline started to wear off. You straightened up, clearing your throat making Shawn flinch away from you, quickly dropping his hands.

“Are you okay?” He asked, not stepping away from you – his face close enough for you to make out the gold in his eyes in the dark.

Your throat felt dry, “Y – yeah. Thank you.”

He smiled again, “If I knew you were this clumsy, I wouldn’t have brought you here.”

You rolled your eyes, slapping his bicep lightly, “Shut up! It was your fault that I almost fell!”

“No,” he shook his head, “You missed the step.”

“You were dragging me – I couldn’t control my body.”

He laughed, throwing his head back as his eyes shut and body trembled against you, “Don’t turn this on me, y/n.”

“I’m not,” you shrugged, winking, “Just stating facts.”

“Har har,” he rolled his eyes, taking your hand in his again, starting to walk. You pulled his hand, stopping his movements – making him turn back to face you.

“No,” you shook your head, stepping closer to him to that you were standing a step higher than him – now more eye level, “I’m leading this time.”

“You don’t even know where we’re going,” he chuckled.

“You can direct me,” you shrugged, winking again and turning away from him – beginning to lug him up the steps.

You laughed as he whined behind you, constantly trying to walk alongside you, but you always made sure to be one step ahead. This ultimately led to the two of you racing up the steps, making way more noise than you were supposed to.

You grinned victoriously as you reached the top, squeezing his hand, “I won!”

“No,” he snorted, “I won.”

“My foot was on the last step first!”

“But my entire body was on it first,” his eyes crinkled as he smiled down at you.

“What?” You threw your hands up, “That doesn’t count! Everyone knows that the first to reach the finish line wins!”

“I know.”

But you weren’t finished, “The second your body – ”

You paused, staring up at him, “Huh?”

“I know.” He repeated, “I just like seeing you all riled up.”

Your mouth opened and closed in shock. He smirked, taking your hand again, “Come on, we’re almost there!”

You were quiet as he led you to the commentator booth located at the top of the bleachers, your stomach in tangles at the way he held your hand – before turning around to face you with a smile.

“Do you trust me?”

You blinked, “I feel like someone I shouldn’t trust would ask that.”

He chuckled, rolling his eyes before looking down at you expectantly.

“I trust you,” you said after a moment, before raising your pointer finger to wiggle it in front of him, “Don’t make me regret it.”

He nodded, “Promise.”

Not even a minute later, he was making you climb the side of the booth, your hands shaking slightly as you held the thing metal bars that led to the top.

You huffed once you reached the, your hands on your knees as you tried to catch your breath, “You know – when you said we were going for a walk, this is not what I thought you meant?”

“C’mon y/n,” he chuckled, walking past you and seating himself on the edge, his legs dangling as he faced the opposite side of the arena.

You rolled your eyes but sat next to him – your breath catching in your throat as you looked up at the sight. You were so far up that you could see the entire campus.

“Wow,” You mumbled.

“Right?”

You were unable to respond, your eyes flickering as you tried to see everything, not wanting to miss a second of the gorgeous view. Even the slight wind didn’t stop you from grinning widely as your eyes locked on your apartment building.

“Look!” You leaned closer to him, pointing to the lit up structure, “That’s mine!”

He chuckled at your excitement, “I’ll be sure to remember that.”

“For when you come over later tonight to kill me?” You grinned, nudging his shoulder with yours.

“Maybe just eat all your food?” He shrugged.

“No! That’s even worse!”

He threw his head back, his laughter making you smile brightly back at him.

“I know where you live too,” you winked, “Just fyi.”

“There’s barely ever any food at the house, so good luck with that.”

You shook your head, “I actually saw a really nice painting in your living room – might just snag that.”

“The one of the trees?” He snorted, “Take it. Honestly, I’ll pay you to take it.”

“What? Why?” You laughed, pretending not to notice how he shifted closer to you.

“Because Miles painted it during one of his classes last semester, and now we’re not even allowed to breathe near it or he freaks out.”

You covered your mouth as you started laughing again, your thigh brushing his as you moved slightly, “Well if he’s willing to give it – I’m sure Carrie and I have some room in the dorm.”

“He won’t be willing, but we can steal it?”

“Deal.” You raised your hand, your eyes meeting his as he slipped his larger palm into yours, shaking slightly.

You cleared your throat, letting go of his hand, “How did you know about this place?”

“I found it during a very intense game of hide and seek,” he grinned, “No one’s ever found me since.”

“Probably because they can’t,” you snorted, “Getting up here was a struggle and a half.”

Shawn laughed, running a hand through his hair as his eyes stayed trained on your face, “It was an adventure.”

You were silent for a moment, your teeth digging into your bottom lip as you looked back up at him, “You’re full of those, aren’t you Mendes?”

He shrugged, his smile fading slightly as he leaned closer to you, “I think you can figure that out yourself.”

Shivers formed all over you as you watched him, his eyes flickered down to your lips, a small smile forming over them as you realized what he was asking permission for.

You nodded, your eyes flickering shut.

You didn’t move, so he figured it was okay to touch your face. And it was. His hand was so gentle against your skin, your body practically melting against him.

His mouth was on yours not even a second later. His lips were soft, so soft that you had to resist the moan threatening to bubble out of you.

Your hands were in his hair, lightly tugging on the fluffy tendrils, an unexpected groan leaving his lips.

You blushed at the sound, your mouth falling open as you pushed closer to him. Shawn’s hands fell down lower, wrapping around your waist until there was no part of you that wasn’t intertwined with him.

Your butt vibrating brought you out of your thoughts, making you snap away from Shawn – his flushed face staring down at you in a dazed shock.

“S - sorry,” your voice was coarse, “I should probably – ”

He coughed, a lovely pink coating on his cheeks, “Yeah, o – of course.”

You smiled shyly, taking your phone out of your pocket and brining it to your ear, “Carrie? Is everything okay?”

Her voice was slurred on the other end, your eyes widening as you sat up straighter, “Are you okay?”

Shawn’s face was confused as he looked over at you with a worried expression, but you were focused on Carrie.

“Yeahhhhh ‘m fine,” she hiccupped, “P – parties’ over.”

“Oh.” You hadn’t realized that you and Shawn were gone for that long.

“Where are you?” You asked.

“Kitchen with Lukie,” you could hear said boy whine at the nickname in the background, “Come pleaseee?”

“I’m on my way,” you managed to squeak out, before hanging up.

Shawn was already on his feet, his hand outstretched to pull you to your feet.

“Party’s over,” you mumbled, a heat spreading through your cheeks as you noticed his flushed lips.

“Oh,” he chuckled, scratching his neck, “We’ve been gone for a while then eh?”

You nodded, “Let’s go. I don’t want someone else to steal Miles’ painting before I get the chance.”

taglist: @alone-in-madness @egg-in-a-spork @tw-stydiaaf @musiclover1263 @yourwonderbelle @spideyshcllands @savingmartinski

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just-some-random-blogger · 6 years ago

Text

The Soup

Super Junior Super Junior x SuJuMaknae!Reader Characters: Super Junior (ot13 [+ SJ-M]) Summary: Just like the way you need to give someone soup when they're sick, this is how SuJu reacts when you need them. Word Count: 1k+ Warnings: CRACK, fluff, humor, gnarlyness, etc.

A/N: i need a pick me up so i made this. It’s low key a part 2 to Secrets Of A Maknae, but not really because, well, it’s not HAHAHHAHA, but hello @farewellkorosensei, i’m tagging you cos u said u wanted a part two and i had a part two in mind but then i lost it so now you have this HAHHAHHAHA im sorry im like this

ALSO A DISCLAIMER

THIS IS FICTION IF YALL somehow THOUGHT IT WASNT

none of this is real bro that’s why its an au ?????? ok like ok

Being the only girl in a coed group that’s basically a boy group is not as bad as one may think

Especially since you're the youngest out of everyone, some people just cannot imagine how you do it

Sure like... being the only female means the testosterone thrown your way can be a lot

And there are just some things the guys can't and will never understand

Like how a woman's mind works

But through it all however

You loved being the baby princess

Because you have 13 knights at your side

anD IF EVEN ONE PERSON TRIED TO HURT YOU WELL

AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAH

good luck to them

And in case you were wondering, SuJu is not as sweet as you think

LIKE YES THEY’RE OBVIOUSLY THERE FOR EACH OTHER BUT

here's how each member would react to you needing them

ps yall

dis shiz is HELLLAAAA LONG SO it’s under the cut

Being the eldest meant Leeteuk found everyone as his responsibility

BOY ESPECIALLY IF THEY'RE NOT EVEN IN SUPER JUNIOR LAJSIQBSUHWBSLAIDYLAWUDLKHKK;

and to you, who is in his group, their youngest AND only female member, he would drop everything for

Everyone who's watched korean TV knows this

cos yall do tv show hostings togther

and everybody knows how soft he is around you

like i mean he’s naturally caring towards everyone

and he’s normally high-spirited with others

BUT YOU TAKE THE CAKE

like you + him equals shenanigans like firecrackers

he does 8999+ dad jokes when you’re his co-host

someone save s.korea

but let us not forget is is the EPITOME of gentleman

he always offers his arm to you

he takes of his jacket or gets a blanket for you to cover your legs when you sit

errbody is like “stfu, we get it stop flexing”

you two are just like “??????????????????? bro fLeXiNg whUAT?”

“i get yall are married n in love but like. pls keep it under wraps.”

“BROOOO HAHAHHAHAH WE’RE JUST FRIENDS”

and then ????????????

mmmmhmmmm

we believe you

cos its all we can do tho

and i mean you two aren’t married but are so too tbh

ELF’s call you two the parents of SuJu

and think you two are sO ADORABLE IT HURTS

anyway

He is definitely the most understanding with you through the age gap you have

And even if he finds some of your actions odd due to that age gap, he always works through it and tries to think proactively

"What are you doing????????"

"IM DOING A CHALLENGE OPPA YOU WANNA JOIN?!" you say as you attempt to put on makeup with your non-dominant hand

THE AMOUNT OF TIMES HE'S WALKED INTO YOU DOING SOMETHING WEIRD IS BEYOND FATHOM

But if you need him

He.

Will.

Be.

There.

Doesn't matter if he's hosting 287378 tv shows at the moment

If you call because some loser broke your heart

He's taking the day off

If you call just to check in and he hears even a hint of sickness in your voice

biTCH MOVE OVER. HE GOT SOME PORRIDGE

He would take care of you even if he was also sick

He would find a way to go to you even if you were halfway across the world

You cant even get mad @ him cos you will and have done the same woops

IF SOMEONE EVEN TEST U YOU WILL BREAK THEM 4 LEETEUK

and obvi we have to add

his dog Shimkung prolly loves you more than him, just sayin

She runs to you and ignores Leeteuk when youre around

Because she loves playing with you

And she loves your energy

And the attention you give her

And the treats you bring

And because everyone loves you

And Leeteuk cant even because he loves you too

Woooooops

Yall listen up

If you think heechul is scary by himself

Try bringing up SuJu's maknae up

I dare you

Just mention your name

and he WILLLLLL EXPLODE

Doesnt matter if it's praise

He Will BE TRIGGGGGEERREEDD

there’s literally an entire 20 (and going) part video comp. of his ears steaming when you’re brought up

like the mere thought of you is already to set him off

It doesn't even phase him if the person who spoke of you is younger or older

The death threats he will sputter is limitless

his tongue is sharper than silver

And the deadliest death glare that's thrown may cause a heart attack.

strangely enough though

but knowing heechul, not strange enough

he is ALWAYS THE FIRST to throw you under the bus

during interviews

ESPECIALLY IF THEY’RE LIVE I CANT

and yall always bicker about the dumbest shit

everyone is like, “wait, they’re not the ones that are married?”

the answer is no

but honestly,

He's broken up with someone because of you

Because they were mean to you, i mean

And because he was tired of them too hekhek

and lyk Heechul may be short

But nothing is stopping him from getting into a fist fight with someone 1000+ ft taller than him.

Ok.

That may be a slight lie cos he'd prolly call the rest of the guys and 5672 security guards to be on his side.

would honestly fite anyone for you

any AND everyone to be honest

He's also very picky with your boyfriends

"Ya, he looks like a womanizer."

"Ya, he looks like an idiot."

"Ya, he smells like woman's perfume."

"Ya, he smells like cigarettes."

"Ya, I don't understand what you see in him."

"Ya, I can't believe you're wasting your time with him."

"Ya, why are your standards so low when you know a guy like me?"

"Ya,"

"Ya."

"YA!"

"You can do better."

and you’re kinda just like, “y dont u just look for a guy for me? or better yet, if you think you’re so great, why don’t you just date me?”

“pshhhh, as if, i’m too pretty for you, child”

is what heechul always says

to you and to everyone who asks why you aren’t dating

he also does’t ever answer your calls

cos he’s always too busy with his video games or selfies

so you get really frustrated when you call him to come over and he doesn’t call

but like

he’s somehow already at your house

????

cos you needed him and he knew that

????

idek either bro

he has a sixth sense with ya gurl

HE IS SUCH A DAD TOO

***NOT DADDY

DAD BECAUse

he will baby the heck out of you every moment he gets

but not in public cos his image

also he’s never one to flaunt even with his personality

he CUDDDLESSSS THE HECK out of you

and kinda makes himself clingy for the sake of endorphins

cos he is your happy pill

and your go to man when the world just sucks hard

he gives pretty solid advice

like the ones where you really need some

because he’s never one to sugar coat and will tell you youre a bitch if you are being one

and because of how he is, when he gets soft with you, you know he means it because he’s a broken brick most of the time

he’s also who you normally vent out your problems and burning frustrations to

not that he listens

you mostly just assault him and he takes it

JOKE HE ASSAULTS YOU RIGHT BACK

but somehow that’s therapeutic for both of you ???

smdh

i’d add heechul’s pets

BUT THAT BOY HAS A ZOO

and maybe i’m just shimkung biased lolol

ANYWAY the gist of you and his pets is that you love them and they love you

the end

bro

don’t even get me started on yesung

you know how he likes to think he’s all that

how he’s like really good at singin

wHICH HE IS UHM HAVE YOU NO EARS

but he’s like actin all airy sometimes

whICH IS Y u and eunhyuk havE A BALL MESSIN WITH HIM

EUNHYUK + U = YESUNG CANNOT LIVE

someone save Yesung from his retarded dongsaengs

lol but eunhyuk comes later

anyway, he’s airy

that side of him comes in handy 4 u

because he makes for a gr8 hypeman

letz be real

SUPER JUNIOR together is the loudest bunch of morons that will hYPE YOU DO YOUR DEATH

but you cant keep havin that when you go to award shows

YOU TRIED IT ONCE AND EVERYONE WAS LIKE AWW DATS CUTE

IT’S FKIN NOT BITSH

try havin your ears pierced with screaming every time you’re even remotely related to what the host is talking about

anyway back to yesung

he be your date to eveything

cos he ALWAYS has time to be all that

i mean you bring specific members to the specific events they fit into

u’ll understand laterz

but mostly yesung is your man for the job

cause he’s always available

you know when he’s not touring or holding concerts

whenever you need a date

he puts on all his extra accessories and offers you his arm on the red carpet

or just holds your hand cause it’s easier on his part

AND BOY HE’S ANNOYINGLY LOUD FOR YOU THE ENTIRE TIME

IT DOESN’T EVEN MATTer if it’s for some black suit event

he’s prOLLY GON BUST A MOVE and promote SJ’s black suit while he’s at it what a turd

he’s so loud in fact that you’ve reached a point past embarrassment

ur like, “Yeah, he’s my loud date. problem?”

honestly, yall have to be dumb not to see how in love you two are

there are theories on how you two ARE the one true pair

like the way yesung looks at you when you’re striking a pose

answering a question

thanking someone

receiving an award

laughing at a joke

existing in general

and you RIGHT BACK @ him

only an idiot would

but haha

nope.

just friends too

Y U ALWAYZ LYIN

ye but itz trueeeeee

no matter how fancy you get

or domestic

cos did i mention you two do the lamest things too

like there is no in between

you go buy groceries

tour Gangnam

hand in hand obviously, duh, you do it every time you’re together

as with every member of super junior but yall already knew

i think i strayed too far from my point

point is he’s there to hang out and do nothing

cos thats what both of you are good for anyway

nothing

btw he’s who you bring shopping for clothes

but only like the nice kind you feel me

you’ll get that in a little while too

but like you always go to high-end stores together

never couture tho cos why ??

and YOU GUYS DO MAKEUP TUTORIALS BECAUSE OMG HE’S SUCH A VAIN AND LIKES TO PRETEND HE CAN ACTUALLY DO MAKEUP UGH I HATE HIM

he’s the one you treat like your diary mostly

the everyday stress you have piled up he’s the one you sift through with

like you tell him all the mundane things

and he’d nod uninterested

and then you’d stop cuz you realiized he doens’t care

and then he’d get mad and be all like “Ya, why’d you stop, what happened to the leaf you kicked?”

i think imma stop here cos you get it

yall good for nothing HAHAHH

you and kangin get into the stickiest shit every time your crackheads team up

and being the loyal one you are

you always point and blame him when things hit the fan

and he’s always like “Me?”

and then points right back at you

you’re reactions to each other are fandom memes fml

and you’d think with all the treachery you pull on each other you would never be able to count on Kangin

but that is so DAMN FAR from the truth

cos this boy is insufferably thoughtful when it comes to you

his favoritism shows

like he’ll sell super junior for a 1 cent

BUT YOU ARE NOT PART OF THAT DEAL

he’s usually the one that shoos the guys off when they’ll all up on your ass

he’s also the one to kick heechul when he gets too annoying

or anyone in general

He’s usually your partner in crime when it comes to screwing up SJ’s image

and you havE THIS SIGNATURE ESCAPE ROUTINE WHEN THINGS GO SIDEWAYS

“it wasn’T ME!” you both shout, and then you jump on Kangin’s back and he runs away.

and yes there is also a compilation of you morons doing that for 15 minutes straight in multiple languages

dumb shit

he’s not as big as teasing you as Heechul

but he usually calls you ugly, that’s who you are to him

if you’re texting someone, it’s usually him

you send him ideas for a prank or sm shit

and he’s like imma do you one better

and then you just burn SM to the group bwahahaHAHAHAHAHAHHA

kidding

not kidding

you guys dont actually get to hang out often

but wHen you do there is a warning signal

and idek y yall pretend to be pranking someone else

but yall end up stabbin each other anyway

But there is also those times when you just cry

and he’s there to listen

he’s not as understanding as his hyungs, cos Leeteuk knows what to do, Heechul knows what to say, and Yesung knows how to remember the important things

but he is always there

he tells you as much as he can

and he aint dumb he can say a lot

but he’ll mostly just try to brighten up your day

by telling you a plan to attack one of the members

ANDDDDDDD

PIGGY BACK RIDES

as ive mentioned before, you jump on his back when you skedaddle out of the scene you just caused

which have caused an uproar from many

your company mostly has to fend off rumors of you and him being together the second most

youll find out who soon enough

but back to you an Kangin

he usually offers to give you a piggy back ride

even tho he doesn’t really want to

when you’re down

cos u smol child like to be carried

ew grow up sis

BTW HE WILL FITE ANYONE WHO TELLS YOU THAT

dats all i got fam

you and Shindong work the third most together outside super junior

dats obviously behind Leeteuk

and #2 who will be revealed later

and actually, you two have a very serious and business-like mindset when you’re together

which is why his skillz fly when you collab

you have youtube channel together that’s just u two posting vids you guys want to do

yall fund it urselvs and get some of ur friends to join in

WHICH FANS, ELF AND OTHERWISE LOVE

that’s why you normally go to him when you need help with work

meaning if you’re unsure if you should do a drama he’s going to lay down the points 4 u

he usually acts like your manager

and visits you the most when you’re on set

he’s who de-stresses you when you’re working

and the one who you can count on to back you up when someone at work needs to have a little piece of your mind

he’s who you call up when you want to share an idea or a vision

and is the one to more than others root for you and help you all throughout

whenever works stresses you out,

you two do something fun together

watch a film

annoy one of the other members

etc

you call him up when you have a crazy idea

you call him up when you have a song or plot in mind

you call him up when you are in need of advice

though sometimes his advice is to go to leeteuk or heechul

cos he knows he has limits

which is why you love him

because he’s real and never pretends to know more than he does

with that said though, he does know a lot

and will tell you all he knows about whatever it is you are asking about

you guys do a lot of live streams as well

sometimes its pointless

sometimes its intorspective

but most times its pointless af

and most times yesung is crying in the distant not-so-distant background

cos like i said yall hangout the most

so sometimes shindong gets into the mix

and you do the weirdest shiz in front of camera

the amount of role plays you’ve done that made viewers go ???? is uncountable smh

like like

where you’re an astronaut

and you need to tell the emperor of goryeo he’s going to be assassinated

and then yesung is the emperor’s horse

and yall die of laughter

or that time yall kissed “by accident”

and none of yall were surprised

and everyoNE WAS LIKE I KNEW IT

and you both ended up laughing

and then everyone was like? >?????

?????

idek either tbh

or that one time you were a cake

as in a chocolate cake

running away from an orge

which was yesung

and shindong was the exterminator that kept hitting him with a pillow whenever he’d talk

i cant believe

you think yesung’s had enough with you and eunhyuk

speaking of...

eunhyuk + u is quite like u + kangin

ppl pray for you to get separated

like pls

and then when you add DONGHAE

the world wants to implode and delete itself

eunhyuk is your usually your fake boyfriend

joke, he’s the fake love triangle interest

you’ll get that later

anyWAY

you say all the time every time you get the chance to that the reason why you dance half as good as you do now is because of eunhyuk

you make his ego fly through the roof

and he’s always like

dawwwww stop

no keep going

which is why if for whatever reason you need a dancer or a choreographer or anything between those lines

you call eunhyuk

or jung yunho but that’s not the point

point is the world explodes when there is a sexy suju concept

because you and eunhyuk are always paried up

the flexibility and coordination of your bodies

leaves the world thirsty

eunhyuk is pregnant because of you

Dem body rolls

Shimi-shimi

The dehydration is real

you two just do something in sync

AND THE WorLD canNOT

EVEN IF YOU DID IT BY ACCIDENT

and surprise even both of you

the world cannot

whenever you do a show together they make you do so many dances

cant blame them tho, u two be bomb

point is he’s normally your dance partner in almost everything super junior

and 73% not super junior

but beyond that he is also your bestest buddy

and since it’s a package deal, most of the time donghae is there

yall do everything from wacky antics

to window shopping

to roller coaster riding

to just lying around talking about life

actually, yall pranked the world by saying your were going out once

and thE WORLD BLEW UP

HOW FKING DARE

WE KNEW IT ASHKSDHASDHA

but then yall were like “oh we be playin yall”

EVERYONE WAS SO MAD

LIKE YALL EVEN HAD THE MEMBERS BELIEVING

DONGHAE CRIED BECAUSE HE FELT SO BETRAYED THAT HE DIDNT KNOW

HEECHUL CALLED BULL THO

BUT EVERYONE WAS HELLLLLLA MAD BOUT THIS

When you went sikE Leeteuk wasnt surprised

and everyone gave you shit for so long

Ryeowook vowed to kill both of you

kangin thought it was pretty good though

Eunhyuk and you normally go to parties together

and because you are a d U M b fking drunk

he’s always the one who cleans up after you

because you vomit

and cry

and try to kiss everyone

which is why you have safely kissed everyone in super junior when you're wasted

eunhyuk especially

there are pics to prove it

but eunhyuk doesn;t mind

he’d rather be kissed by your vomit flavored mouth than have some ho try to do something to you

he gets really unsettled when other guys come into the picture

he’ll karate chop A morOn

DARE HIM I SWEAR

ya think he be small

but he be strong

those dance moves are his weapon

KA PAW BISH

and we def cant end this without saying

he makes you hangover soup

and all that jazz

when you wanna work out or feel sick

you call eunhyuk

i mean leeteuk loves you but you cant move an inch with that boy

so its eunhyuk

unless you wanna be lazy and need a mom (so leeteuk)

honestly i cheated with that lord almighty part

ARG IM SO SORYY IDEK WHY I HAVE NOTHING TO SAY WHEN I LOVE EUNHYUK SO MUCH

ZHOUMI IS THE LOVE OF YOUR LIFE

OR AT LEAST YOU SAY EVERYTIME YOU GET WHEN YOU SEE HIM

which you wish would be a lot more than not

IF you have anything to do in China

it’s zhoumi everyday

he’s who taught you how to speak the language and the one who makes fun of you the most because of your prononciation

but you know obviously its all in good fun

you host some shows together

youve stared in a bunch of chinese mini dramas together

but most of all, you two do a bunch of variety

which people LOVE SO MUCH

liiiiiiiiiike

if you werent so busy with the rest of the world

china would love to keep you for themselves

but anyway back to zhoumi

as i said he be the love of your life

because he’s literally everything you look for in a guy

tall, handsome, smart even though he does DUMB THINGS I CANT BE--

but the only reason why you’re not dating him is

IS BECAUSE YOU ARENT

I have no explaination

you are dating though

like outwardly

it’s like an unspoken thing

where you are dating but youre not and everyone around you agrees

???

kinda

yeh

with all the chinese variety you’ve done

yall have pretty questionable photos and footage together

why is you hand in his mouth

why are you two in one pair of trousers

why are you crying over literal eggshells

why are you laughing at him dressed up in a suit

why is he making heart eyes at you when you;re wearing clown makeup

why is he making heart eyes in general

why are you making heart eyes in general

idk man

what

waht

idek

but what you do know is this

there’s this entire ten page article about how he punch some rich guy in shanghai that tried to get too close and zhoumi threw a punch

yes

out of all the boys in the band who’s said they’d punch a moron on the nose

zhoumi as actually the only one who has had the displeasure of doing just that

It was quite the talk of the town

Honestly many were scared for zhoumi

U and him counted

and the rich moron even threatened to sue

but you pointed out that there was footage in the place and that he’d lose so he should just walk away

of course he walked away

and so yeah

but obviously the sonavbish tried to get rid of any footage

And make it look like an assault

It was to be like an even bigger scandal

but you being a smart bitch that has starred in many dramas with the exact same plot already had a copy and so you won that battle

and zhoumi ‘s career was not ruined

he was even hailed a hero for all the no duh reasons

Yeah he can throw a punch

zhoumi is so soft for you though

and you for him

he’s usually the one who takes your mind off of things

but you hang out the least out of everyone due to sched differences

that doesn’t mean you dont make time for each other though

OKAY NOW FOR EVERYONE’S FAVORITE BB DONGHAE

donghae that knows all your secrets

knows all your dog stories

all your accidental injuries

all your fails

all your successes

it may take a few moments to jump start and access his mental archive

but its there

and Donghae has been your boyfriend on many many occasions

whether or not it be fake or real the world will never know

you guys are the most intimate with each other

like you guys are so casual

and comfortable

that Leeteuk tells you guys off

HeechUL GETS UNCOMFOTABLE

h e e c h u l

even suju separates you on their own will sometimes

and both of you are like

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

donghae is a certified soft boi

and his softness is amplified when you’re together

PDA is second nature to you two

many hand holds

many cuddles

many suggles

platonic?

... sure

and it doesn’t matter where you two are

public

private

interview

korea

japan

america

narnia

nothing stops you from being touchy

people ask you about it all the time

but once again

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Anyway donghae is the go to guy for heart to heart conversations

because he has a heart of gold

the softest purest gold

and he really understands and empathizes

he cries with you over dog movies

and listens to your frustrations

and you listen to him cry

and talk about his feelings

FEELINGS

and you tie it all up by making each other smile

he actually gives really good advice

i mean they all do give good advice at a point

but donghae’s are actually quite on point

even though people think he’s slow

it’s probably because he’s once connected at the hip to you

he’s the one you talk to about boy problems and relationship problems

because he’s the only one that isn’t weirded out about the topic

i mean he’s got a soft spot of you

plus hes really caring

so he’ll listen to whatever topic you want to talk about anyway

he’s really the only who, like, pays attention to all your babbling

most of them tend to overlook that

but never donghae

he’s the guy you call in the middle of the night when you cant sleep

it’s not guaranteed he’ll pick up because i mean duh he has a life

but when he does he really listens

except for when he doesnt

cos he’s tired

and on top of being a cuddly living diary

he’s also your personal massager

like you know those knots on your shoulder

what knots on your shoulders

he massages them away because

youre his ultimate weakness

when you need him he’ll be there in a heartbeat, racing leeteuk to get to you

although he’s not as motherly as leeteuk

he’s more of a brother really

like he is motherly

he does baby you

I MEAN THEY ALL BABY YOU YOU’re THE MAKNAE DUH

but

i can

no actually

i cant explain

because i got nothing

AGAIN WHICH IS FRUSTRATING BECAUSE I LOVE DONGHAE

DHADJ:ASD

YOU AND SIWON ARE THE POWER COUPLE EVERYONE WISHES THEY COULD BE

yall do the most goals things ever

and end up posting it on insta like the aesthetic things you are

he’s the guy you call when you wanna go out and tour

and you guessed it

he’s the second person in super junior you work most with out of the group

can you imagine the power you two hold in dramas

sometimes you do cameos in his shows

sometimes its the other way around

YOU TWO ARE ACTUALLY THE ONLY ONES WITH FOOTAGE OF KISSING

honestly it was a make out but you know

donghae’s fine

Siwon and you travel a lot

in a small scale sense where you just go around on a food trip

or going on a short vacation to another country

dont tell the others tho

YOU DO CHARITIES TOGETHER

and its honestly the cutest thing ever like siwon and his charities ad;hkasd

you two have this meme where its just a compilation of you two lauging

cos yall get WEIRD when you laugh together

your laugh is weird in general

and super junior is weird in general

but you and siwon laughing is just weirder

Whenever you have to go somewhere where you think youre going to die because of the formality

you bring siwon along because he’s the most businessman looking out of everyone

plus he holds a rich man aura

because he is

haha

honestly he should just buy SM wtf

He is also the one you go to for advice

because sometimes crying with donghae isn’t really the way you want to go

he’s normally your outside opinion guy

when you normally have a course of action already in your head

but youre just not sure how to go

he gives solid points

and he’s quite firm with his answers

when you need him he doesn’t come as quick as leeteuk or donghae

but he’s the one who leaves last

because he’s just thorough like that

like if you have a mental break down

he’ll come when he can and make sure to make extra time for you

because he wants to both make it up to you and make sure you’re alright

also

i should add

that on top of being very aesthetic together with your black tie events and whatnot

yall make post memes of each other often on your own accounts SO MUCH

ELFs dig it

iconic really

ryeowook actually hates you

he hates you because you have such a beautiful voic

he hates that youre pretty

he hates that youre talented

HE HATES THE COMPETITION

but it is also what completes him

It adds to his purpose in life

To cruSh u

N remind u who is butter

yall bicker the most out of everyone

yall raise your voices at each other the most

you always attack each other

AND SOMETIMES KYUHYUN PITS YOU TWO TOGETHER AND

it’s too much to handle

but when you catch on that you’re being played

You and ryeowook teamup

AND KYUHYUN PAYS

EVERYONE THAT CROSSES YOU PAYS

BWHAHAHAHAAHHA

the sass is real when you’re together

THE AMOUNT OF SHADE you throw

makes both of your skin visibly darker to a point

he’s mostly the one to call you out when you and kangin are doing something dumb

or when you and donghae start getting cuddly

or when you just show your face to him

because yes he hates you

BUT

if he hears anyone say anything REMOTELY BAD ABOUT YOU

he wILL attacK

if he thinKS SOMEONE’s BEING TOO sarcASTIC

HE WILL CUT THEM

because only HE can be mean to you

which is why they actually think you’re dating

pipe the HECK down if you have something to say

and the feeling is mutual for you

if anyone says anything bad about ryeowook OR ANY OF YOUR BOYS

they’re dead

cold

but sometimes both of you hate super junior together

and theres a bunch of videos of you questioning why you’re both still here

when he’s not hating you though

he’s violently supporting you

VIOLENTLY

have you heard this man scream

HE SCREAMS HIGHER THAN ANY FEMALE FAN COULD

and LOUDER

if you’re doing something live

heS ONLY THERE TO SCREAM FOR YOU

then he’s out

him and yesung are on a roll when you get an award

and on your live performances

theres normally a cut scene to him in the crowd holding a big ass sign that says something mean

like I HOPE YOU TRIP in bold letters

but in fine print is continues IN SUCCESS AND GOOD HEALTH

cheeeeeeeeeezzzzyyyyyy

but that’s ryeowook for ya

Everyone's confused how you are able to be so violent and mean

But also so cheesily soft

Honestly u just weird

And so is ryeowook

when you need advice he fights you first

"How could you be so dumb to have a problem like that"

then,he'll tell you what to do

If he can, he fights your problem

and then solves it for you that way

Thats how it is, violently soft hek

So serious

ANYWAY KYUHYUN ALSO HATES YOU

DUH

but unlike ryeowook he sometimes actually make people end up wondering if youre dating

Cause ryeowook and u be mean but not so lovey dovey

But you and kyuhyun are mean and lovey dovey

he makes sure you suffer

suffer in embarrassment in live television

and will do everything in his power to get you and ryeowook to stab each other

but if you squint hard enough

he acts hella whipped for you to be pretty damn honest

anyone with a brain can put together that he’s basically like a child

a child being mean to his crush because he doesn’t know what to do

EW FEELINGS

but yall know what

even though ya both be also killing each other

THE BALLADS YOU GUYS HAVE

I cannnnOt even

is OFF THE CHARTS TEAR JERKING

any drama that has been blessed with your vocals

----i meaaaan-----

your song can save any drama

becAUSE

and yall do a lot of live performances together

uhm did I mention you’re basically part of the sub-unit KRY

actuallY JK nvm, it’s you and kyuhyun alone actually

just you and him

hitting those notes like no other

AnD theN theRE was This incident

that you had to perform in on a live awardshow

BUT you Got INTO an aCCIDENT

but like a vocal accident

as in you lost your voice

YOU KNOW WHAT HAPPENED

kyuhyun covered for you duh

because even if he wants you to suffer in public

he wants it to be by his hand

and not because you ended up getting sick suddenly

I do have to say he’s not very reliable tbh

for the sole reason he wishes to be the true maknae and to desTROY U

yes

that

and EW FEELINGs

“are you sure you hate her though” -literally everyone

“YES!” kyuhyun would answer without missing a beat

“seem like bull by ok”

THE MEMES YOU TWO HAVE AS WELL

THE MEMES

the there can only be one

i would’ve killed you if the lights were closed

excuse you, trash

i sarangHATE U Bitch

boi i cant wtf am i doin

and again

i cannot stress enough that kyuhyun wants your death by his hand

so if someone else comes for you

he’s going to attack that person more than they have you

whenever people ask him about you to, he gets all protective and scary

in summarry, he wants death but not really

yikes

heNRY IS THE WORST

he’s the only one who actually treats you like youre a child

wtf

like you two are the closest in age

the audacity

the nerve

i cant believe

he literally pulls the Oppa card

every

frikin

wHeRE

LISTEN BOI SHE BE GROWN

he literally holds your hand when you cross the street

he asks you if you’ve eaten

he coddles you, especially around others

he brings you juice on set if ever you appear on the same show

LieK

he’s so embarrassing

he be actin as if he’z ya dad

liIKEEE

get a grip

but as embarrassing as he is

he is also your best friend

and he talks fondly about you everywhere

literally never talks shit about you

unless its true tho lololo

and for real is probably literally in love with you

but is like “I’m her older brother tho so”

acts like an older brother 23/6

and the remaining time like a sweet and ExTreMely embarrassing boyfriend

will do anything for you to be honest

YOU TWO GO ABROAD TOGETHER A LOT AND ARE GOALS

if you and kyuhyun do lame things

YOU AND HENRY LIVE IT UP

yall do weird shit online too

and yall have done questionable things on variety

korean

chinese

wherever

which is why you’ve hosted a variety special before

IT WAS ICONIC

if you ever feel down

or sad

or angry

or frustrated

henry is the guy to call to be reminded of the brighter things

like THIS BOY IS ACTUAL SUNSHINE HELP

nothing is impossible or gloomy with henry

and yall thrive in all the crack-ish things you do together

yes

end

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power-of-ages-writeblr · 5 years ago

Text

11/11/11 Tag (22/11/11? Tag?)

Another one of these! This time, I was tagged TWICE by the wonderful @sassypandacandy (go read her books,, i love them). I’ve gotta answer the questions, come up with my OWN questions, and then tag 11 people to answer, only I’m not going to tag eleven people because I still don’t think I quite KNOW eleven people yet. Also, because I got tagged twice with two different sets of questions, I’m going to answer both sets in one post, and then just come up with eleven questions of my own, because it takes me yonks to come up with questions and I’m lazy. Eso si que es, y’know?

What’s the first thing you remember writing?

A four-page story about a Diplodocus when I was… definitely before I was ten years old. Maybe like five or six. I was very proud of it.

What’s the last thing you wrote purely for yourself?

Actually, I pretty much always write for myself, so the last thing that I wrote/started to write… ooh-er. That’d be the Warrior Cats fanfiction I’ve been working on. :P

Are you a WIP playlist person or a WIP aesthetics person?

Playlist, probably. I tend not to make playlists specifically for WIPs – instead, I’ll assign songs and soundtracks to specific characters and scenes – but I’m still better at throwing together playlists then making aesthetics LMAO

What’s a book you wish you’d written?

Uuuuh… maybe it’s just because I’m young (barely an adult), but I don’t have anything where it’s like “ah I wish I’d used that idea” or “wish I’d written this book”. I still have a lot of writing ahead of me, hopefully, so all my ideas I hope to actually get out some day. (Assuming that’s,,, what the question is asking me)

What’s your favourite book adaptation?

Ironic because it doesn’t follow the books that closely, but I love the How To Train Your Dragon films very much.

Which of your characters would you like to have a conversation with? What would you like to talk about?

The downside to Pandemonium’s Bane being filled with eccentric personalities and cooky characters means that there’s actually few of them I’d LIKE to have a conversation with, because most would be too dickish or too annoying for my tastes xDD That being said, I think me and Plue are on very similar wavelengths, and we have a lot in common (such as both of us wanting to write), so I wouldn’t mind chatting with her for a bit if I had to.

Which of your WIP worlds would you most like to live in?

The Power of Ages stories are mostly set in one universe (the Nimbus System) so I guess I’d have to go with that one by default. There’s Neil’s dimension, I guess, but it’s destroyed, so…

Have you ever written anything inspired purely by a song? If so, what song was it?

I haven’t written anything inspired just by a single song, but I HAVE got certain scenes or character backstories based off of songs, or even the concepts they’re based around. I have a whole battle between brothers planned out to the soundtrack that plays when Shifu fights Tai Lung in Kung Fu Panda, and listening to the Iron Man soundtracks helped me with both the conception of a new character and her placement in my roster (and yes, she does invent things and fly around, although there are also some major differences)

Have you ever written poetry? Do you still? Why or why not?

I… haven’t written poetry. And the reason for that is… I mean, I guess it doesn’t really jibe with me? Granted I haven’t considered it heavily, but it was always my least favourite aspect of learning English at school, and I just never fell in love with it the same way I fell in love with writing conventional narratives.

Who would direct an adaptation of your writing?

I ain’t big on directors, so IDEK. I guess in terms of the rewrite of Maelstrom (my current main WIP) I’d pick Sam Raimi, who proved with his Spider-Man films that he can blend fun superhero narratives with slightly darker elements pretty well.

How do you motivate yourself when you don’t feel like writing?

Mainly by having multiple projects to work on! That way, if I ain’t feeling what I’m working on, I can switch over to another one, and bingo bango, I can keep writing. (Hypothetically. Sometimes it ain’t that simple, obviously.) I also use music, and I also take advantage of being in situations where it’s like, I’d rather write then do the alternative. Do you know how much writing I got done in lessons? So much. :P

What scenes are the worst to write?

The ones that I haven’t planned out – sometimes I have very specific ideas for how I want scenes to happen, and I’m excited to get to them, but other times they’re just obligatory because there’s certain information I have to convey. That makes it a challenge to write it in a compelling way, because why should the reader care if I don’t?

What can you say is a thing you love most about your writing?

I’d say I like the dialogue/character interplay/narrative description-y sort of stuff. I think I’m good at giving everything levity, and keeping it breezy and entertaining even if I myself find the writing process to be a bit of a slog. Plus, it’s funny to read back over, and it’s also funny to watch my discord quote a line and then keysmash at it. :P

What is writing advice that you take to heart?

It’s from Aaron Sorkin’s writing masterclass – the idea that a story is defined by the main character’s INTENTION, the OBSTACLE facing them, and the TACTICS they use to overcome it.

How do you keep yourself from quitting writing together?

Honestly, it’s not like I have to try that hard! By this point I’m desperate to tell these stories that I have in mind, so I have a sort of innate compulsion to write because I wanna get it all out there. I’ll get back to you if that compulsion runs out, but for now, I see myself writing long into the future.

What is the strangest thing you’ve searched up on the internet for writing purposes?

Probably the capabilities of medieval-era people to recognise nuclear technology. (And for the record, the answer is “pretty low”.)

Not a question, but shoutout a writeblr (or multiple) that you think needs to hear that they are awesome and doing a great job (by the way everyone, you all are awesome and doing a great job. Keep it up.)

Well obviously I’m gonna shout out the person who tagged me in the first place – Kels. I await the final(?) book in the DOOT series with great anticipation.

Your OCs are trapped on a deserted island, what would they be doing?

I WANNA say they’d try and work as a team, but, uh. It may not go so well. Dante and Plue would probably be the most practical. Gaia would be good at grunt work but not focus on the task at hand, Rose would be functionally useless but good at moral support, Jacen would try to organise things but Gaia would just push him in the sea for jokes… I reckon they’d escape eventually, I suppose, but it wouldn’t exactly be a clean-cut affair, you know? xD

What is your biggest inspiration for your WIPs?

I actually have various inspirations – I think collectively my biggest inspiration is the MCU, in that it’s a bunch of interconnected stories set in the same universe about different characters and also there are superpowers. xDD

A habit you have when it comes to writing?

Not doing it (thank you writer’s block)

A fact about your world and/or characters?

I have debated killing of MANY of my characters, but have only actually come to concrete decisions one way or the other with a few.

If your WIP/s got turned into a movie or series, what would be the quote on the promotional poster or trailer?

Oh, I’m gonna do this for ALL the WIPs, this seems fun!

Of Encounters and Trysts – Two Hearts, One Soul (or something equally cheesy)

Hit and Run – Even the indomitable aren’t invincible

Maelstrom – Destiny Begins

The Destroyer of Worlds – One Case, One Team, One Superpower

Survivor – It’s every man for themselves

Savants – Not so different

Omnia Vincit Amor – Good things come to those who get traumatised

Cometh the Hour – Six thousand years from home

Alright, now it’s (finally!) time for my eleven questiones:

1 – Does music help you write, or does it just distract you?

2 – What’s your favourite writing tool? A laptop? Notepad and pens? Quills and inkpot?

3 – Do you have to physically go to places to get a feel for them and feel as though you can set writing in them?

4 – What got you into writeblr?

5 – How well can your OCs dance, do you think?

6 – Do you have a favourite writing snack? If so, what is it?

7 – Bionicle. Thoughts?

8 – Is there a specific piece of media (movie, show, book, w/e) that you could say has been more of an inspiration to you than anything else?

9 – What’s the best soundtrack you know for getting pumped and hyped up?

10 – If you could only write one genre for the rest of your writing career, what would you go with?

11 – What’s your favourite music-based meme? (Examples include “LET’S GO”, “CREEPER/AWW MAN” and “We Are Number One But ___”)

Tagging… @thelimeonade, and @dawnuchiha!

#Not Power of Ages #Tag Game #11/11/11 tag #these questions are always fun to answer!!!

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tchoking · 7 years ago

Text

Learning Curve

pairing: loki x poc!reader (gender neutral) genre: fluff word count: 2.5k+ warnings: racial discrimination, murderous thoughts (?), i honestly don’t remember if there are swears in this one but it’s me so better safe than sorry summary: Loki has struggled to grasp midgardian racial discrimination but through y/n, he slowly and surely comes to understand it. And hate it.

a/n: I’ve been putting this one off for so long and I actually cried while writing this... it really just got to me idek anymore. Based off of some of my experiences (yes someone said that to me on the northern line even though i speak better English than him). uhhhhhh this kinda counts as avenger!reader too i guess. and i know i said i write for black readers but i had to do sth for out nbpoc brethren, this fic felt like it was the one to do it with.

Your name: submit What is this?

Loki always listened intently whenever you spoke of the things you had gone through; his blood boiling every time you recalled someone underestimating you, taunting you, insulting you, simply because of the colour of your skin. He often wondered why midgardians were so fixated on outward appearances. Back on Asgard, nobody really cared what colour your skin was— an asgardian was an asgardian and every asgardian was built with the same matter, had the same blood coursing through their veins.

So, when you and Loki had initially started dating and you had warned about the looks the two of you might receive and the words he may overhear, he had been confused. He could not understand why you would be so worried about what people will think of the two of you, of your relationship. Loki thought you were simply embarrassed to be seen with him, that you were looking for excuses and he stupidly voiced these thoughts. A grimace etched on his face as he spat that you were simply ashamed of him, ashamed of being seen with a jotunn.

He recalled you leaning back, your expression clouded in disbelief as you remained silent and he had thought this is it, they’re definitely leaving now but then you spoke quietly, voice calm. Loki would never forget the words you said first, “I’m going to take my time to respond to you because I want to choose my words carefully, this doesn’t need to be a fight and right now, every inch of my body wants to shout at you and I’m a few seconds away from doing something I might regret later,” you’d said, walking past him and exiting the room. You returned several hours later, knocking feintly on the door before coming in and you sat him down, explaining what you had meant, trying to help him understand where you were coming from. You got up to leave and he asked you to say but you gave him a soft smile, “I’m still mad at you for talking to me the way you did,” you called behind you as you exited.

Loki had never been one for apologies but he found himself restless, unable to sleep. He needed to apologise, the thought of you being upset with him weighed down on him with such vigour he felt he might suffocate.

You and Loki didn’t go on dates at first, at least not ones that would take place outside the walls of the avengers compound. So, when he posited the idea you were shocked, you’d wanted to go out to many restaurants but had understood that it wasn’t exactly Loki’s scene. He’d noticed the growing lists of places you wanted to go to, the spark of excitement in your eyes when you discovered a new cafe— he’d also noticed how quick you were to hide your new finds, quickly realising it was because you didn’t want to pressure him. How he wished you knew he was willing to do almost anything for you.

“We should go out for dinner,” he said, eyes never leaving the book he was reading. You almost gave yourself whiplash turning to look at him.

“Do you have anywhere in mind?” You asked, suddenly giddy.

“I was hoping you’d choose, actually.”

You look at the time and get off the bed with a start, rushing to gather your things, tripping over your own feet as you struggle to change out of your shorts. Loki can only smile at your antics.

It’s at the restaurant that Loki understands what you were talking about and though he’s so happy to be there with you, he can’t help the anger that builds up within him, hand-in-hand with his sudden comprehension.

The couple adjacent to you keeps smiling at the two of you and both of you pick up on their conversation about the recent royal wedding, talking about how amazing it is they can overcome their race. Loki doesn’t think you hear them, though he’s not sure how you can’t because the pair are putting on this how for the two of you. He sees you roll your eyes when they begin to discuss Americanah and quote lines, though you can quite clearly see one of them scrolling through an article o the very book they’re quoting.

He sees you open your mouth to say something but his hand reaches for your own across the table and you take it, eyes locking with his as he wills you to not say anything because you both know it could easily escalate. You smile softly and Loki begins to talk to you in an attempt to distract you. Your food arrives and soon you’ve forgotten about what had been conspiring next to you.

Loki watches you fondly as you dance in your seat, humming a familiar tune as you take your first bite. He’s so sure he’s well on his way to being so in love with you, it might consume him.

You go to the toilet while Loki settles the bill and when you return, you notice that the couple that was once dining comfortably are now so rigid and mute that you can’t help but allow your gaze to travel to your boyfriend, your brow quirking as he takes your hand to lead you out.

You don’t bother to ask because you’re pretty sure you’ve already figured it out.

Admittedly, you were used to it, you had acclimatised to the stolen glances, gotten used to the scowls. Instead, you held your head high, straightened up your back and walked with a little more confidence, hips swaying more enthusiastically than usual; all in an attempt to show just how unbothered you were. Loki was just here to see it now but to him it felt like he was the cause of these problems.

Loki was used to being treated like a burden but with you it seemed the only one treating him like a burden… Was he, himself. He’d asked you once, why you hadn’t left him since he was making your life more difficult. At this you laughed and he braced himself, waiting for the words he’d been dreading the moment he’d courted you but they never came. Instead, you cradled his face in your hands and told him that nobody’s opinion on the two of you could change the way you felt about him, none of their petty thoughts would stop the love you had for him, none of them could even try.

Loki had never been good at reciprocating feelings, the only kindness and warmth he’d ever truly accepted wholeheartedly was that of Frigga. He admits that he is the reason him and Thor’s relationship feels so strained at times, not for his brother’s lack of effort but for his own shortcomings. However, when you hold him in your arms like that, look into his eyes like you are peering into his soul, like he is your whole world; he can’t help the way his heart beats roughly against his chest, the way he leans into your touch.

In this moment, Loki realises he is so, undoubtedly in love with you.

Loki always listened intently to the stories you told him of your childhood— some good, some bad. He was there when you scrolled through social media, finding new stories about a child bullied and a man incarcerated, both on the basis of ethnicity. Loki had been there when you cried yourself to sleep in his arms, the video of a group of white children shouting “You’re not white!” at a little boy as his mother walked him towards another end of the playground, just trying to allow him to play. Loki’s heart broke for you because he felt your body against his, as your sobs turned into whimpers, shivers racking through your body as you struggled to breathe.

Loki had seen you unravel, seen your seems split as you asked why such a child should have to go through such a terrible experience.

Why did Midgardians place such value on the colour of one’s skin? Loki couldn’t understand.

A few hours later and he’s watching as you sit at kitchen island with Sam and Steve, laughing among yourselves as you told them how you had made Tony spill his iced coffee on himself a few minutes ago. He smiles fondly, eyes tracking your hands as they move animatedly throughout the whole narration.

When the day comes to an end, you walk to your room groggily, regretting the decision to read ‘one last chapter’ because that one chapter subsequently turned into six. You barely registered the figure that was already in your bed until it is wrapping its arms around you, causing you to sit up with a start.

“Loki, don’t do that,” you sigh, sliding back into his arms. A hum of approval leaving your lips as you lay your head on his chest, his cold fingers dancing across your back. He feels you smile against him, placing a kiss on his chest and snuggling closer into his side.

He had wanted to bring pain and suffering to the people of Midgard and he had abandoned those desires long ago but sometimes he looked at you and realised he’d do anything to keep you happy, kill anybody that came in the way of your happiness.

It’s when you’re away on a mission with Natasha that he finally has an epiphany.

Loki’s days are now so consumed with you that in your absence he feels misplaced, he gets by though, reading books and sometimes pulling harmless pranks on the rest of the avengers living in the compound.

He’s in front of the mirror when it happens, drying his hair with a towel as he readies himself for the day. He doesn’t know what exactly ignites the thought but he’s looking into the eyes of his reflection and all at once it comes to him. He remembers how much he hated himself after discovering he was a jotunn, how he had wished to have never been born, how much he grew to despise his existence. He thinks about how it was the words he heard growing up, that jotunns were lesser beings, were despicable, unlovable, those words that made him want to throw up whenever he looked at his reflection after finding out his truth.

He thinks back to how he saw midgardians as inferior, how he had treated you, treated the avengers… Anyone that wasn’t Asgardian really. Humans weren’t the only ones focused on appearances and social status and all of the things he’d believed only plagued inferior races, no, it was universal.

Loki, doesn’t tell you of this revelation when you do return but you do take notice of it because the next time you’re on a tirade about how people just can’t let yours have anything, his reply isn’t his usual nod and soothing words but instead a comment on how it’s reproduced generation to generation in a vicious cycle.

You’re on the subway, heading back home after one of Peter’s decathlon thingies, you’re beyond tired, it’s way past late seeing as Tony took it upon himself to have a dinner after and stay even after Peter and his friends left; their curfews looming upon them. It was fun in the moment, laughing with Sam and Clint, making fun of Tony and teasing Bucky. Loki’s hand not once leaving your body, either on your thigh or locking your fingers together. You ended up switching seats with Thor because the longer the dinner went on, the more bold Loki’s gestures became, too bold for public.

Now, you were on the subway, head resting on your boyfriend’s shoulder, giggling as he recounted the dinner from his perspective. The nicknames and exaggerations filling your sleep addled mind with humour. When he finishes, a comfortable silence settles and you sigh in content.

The seats are empty, except for you and Loki, there are only two other men there. Your friends had left you at the subway station with plans of their own and it makes you wonder what kind of plans ancient relics like Steve and Bucky would have on Saturday night at 12 am. You would never think to be on this line, this late, you had no business doing such and you would have gotten off before you even got on if not for the arm secured around your waist, reassuring you that you would be okay because even if you had fought unspeakable evils in the past- some things were too efficiently socialised into you to forget.

You lazily claw at his blazer pocket, silently asking for your phone, which he has been forced to carry— along with your wallet and lip-balm because it would ‘ruin the fit’. He hands it to you, prompting to you to sit up as you unlock it to show him the pictures you’d secretly taken of him when he had been distracted in a conversation with his brother and bruce.

You almost scream when you notice a man sitting two seats over from you. When did he get there?

“Too bad you can’t speak English as well as you can use one of those, eh?” He asks, mockingly.

“Excuse me?” you reply, incredulously, unable to fully wrap your head around the situation.

“Go back to your country you motherfuckin—”

He never gets to finish his sentence because his body is flung onto the wall. You’re in shock because Loki never uses his telekinesis, deeming it primitive compared to his unrivalled intellect.

You feel his arm lose contact with your body as he stands up, eyes focused as he moves towards the man who is now shaking, stumbling over his words as he attempts to back away.

Loki always listened intently whenever you spoke of the things you had gone through, thinking of them as distant memories, forgetting it was still your reality. Loki is so, undoubtedly in love with you, he’d do anything to keep you happy, kill anybody that came in the way of your happiness.

He’s towering above the man now, a menacing look in his eyes as he speaks.

“I don’t know what makes you think you can take that tone and say such cruel words to the love of my life while I’m sat right there and I certainly don’t know what dastardly ideas have been planted in your head to make you feel as if you are better than people that don’t have the same skin colour as you or the same origin as you but today, I’ll teach you to respect people.”

You don’t have to see Loki’s face to know he may do something drastic and it’s in that moment you realise he is willing to give up everything for you. You shut your eyes tight as you will yourself to stand up. You will not let him fight your battle for you, you cross the space between you swiftly and it’s then you see the dagger in his hands. You wrap your fingers around his arm, gently pushing him out of your way, he looks uncertain and reluctant but moves to stand behind you anyway.

You start off talking calmly and Loki doesn’t know when exactly you start shouting, he’s not paying attention. He is instead thinking of what he would have done had you not stepped in. Loki has learnt many things by going out with you and it seems that though you are his greatest strength, you are also his biggest weakness.

#loki laufeyson #loki laufeyson x reader #loki laufeyson x poc!reader #loki x poc!reader #loki x black!reader #loki laufeyson x black!reader #loki imagine #loki fanfic #loki scenario #loki laufeyson imagine #loki laufeyson fanfiction #loki laufeyson scenario #loki fluff #loki laufeyson fluff

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ocean-butch · 6 years ago

Note

How is cas different from ur other girlfriends

akcjwjxia i had to wait like SIX HOURS to answer this bc of a goddamn test i had bUT OH BOY ANON AM I GONNA LOVE DOING IT alfjadjsk i just love talking about my gf i love her so much i wanna gush about her 25/8

the short answer would be basically in every way bUt imma do it part by part.

okay so, in a simplified version i’ve had relationships with people whose personalities worked well with me but who were shitty girlfriends or a good girlfriend who just didnt really fit with my personality. i’ve actually given that so much thought even before i met cass, but the point is that i met her and she was just perfect for me in both ways (technically its more complicated bc theres a bunch of logic into this that im not explaining bc my mind is weird and it would be Way too long but anyways). but ok let get into How she fits me perfectly.

first of all literally no one ever in my entire life has made me laugh as easily and genuinely as she does. im not even exaggerating, like laughing was never really A Thing for me to look for in girls bc it just never happened???? like i had fun conversations and stuff but there was never anyone that made me go “holy shit i have never laughed this much with anyone else” and we have So many inside jokes, which is a thing that i almost never have????? and i always used to wish i did bc everyone would talk about it and i’d feel like i just wasnt funny and That was the problem. and also this is really important bc its one of the things that made me realize that i liked (and eventually, came to love) her. bUT its not the only one so theres also like all these things that we like and we can talk about for HOURS like i remember when i watched infinity war and the first thing i did when i got home was call her and we talked about it for like 2 hours idek but it was great. the point is, we have a bunch of shared interests (which isnt like 100% necessary but its still really nice), wHICH LEADS ME TO: her music taste is amazing and i love that so much bc i love music With My Entire Soul and its the best thing in the fucking world (after cass & my friends and tied with the ocean) but yeah thats great too. AND i think more importantly than the last 2 things is that she is literally so fucking easy to talk to. like ever since the beginning we didnt really have that awkward phase where we run out of things to talk about and the conversation keeps dying like we never had that it just flowed so well and that was such a good feeling. another thing is also how comfortable i feel talking to her.

like i have never felt this way with any of my girlfriends bc i was always scared that i was gonna be annoying or say something Wrong and they’d start to realize i sucked and then break up with me, but shes just so kind and idk she just has this way about her that makes me feel at home and its always been there like i dont believe in love at first sight or anything like that but i swear to god the day after i met her i already felt like i could tell her anything and that was such a comforting thing and i needed that so badly at the time. i dont feel like i was able to describe this aspect very well tbh like im not doing it justice. like, she makes me feel like im not annoying at all, and like i could just randomly start ranting about anything and she would be like super invested in it, and just literally so comfortable in every sense of the word. she is my home, no ifs ands or buts, i just feel it every single time that we talk or that i simply think about her, and i have never felt this so clearly with anyone. and i think this comfort i feel with her is kinda connected with how she has always made me felt so appreciated, in a way that no one has ever done. like, i had like 2 tags about my wants and needs in a relationship, there was “my dream girl” to remind me that i shouldnt settle for anyone after i got out of a rlly bad relationship, and there was “things i wish someone would tell me” after my “first” relationship (i dont really count it bc Officially™ we only dated for a week) because my gf at the time would almost never be affectionate with me and it made me really insecure so i started that tag as a way to vent kinda. anyways my point is that i made those tags bc i would always feel super anxious in my relationships bc i never really felt loved or even wanted (aka the good personalities awful gfs relationships) i just felt like a burden and it was such a big thing for me.

okay now i’ll say that there Kinda was an exception to this before cass, because it would be unfair to say that that relationship was detrimental to my mental health, but it was still different. like, that ex did make me feel wanted most times, but not only did i still have A Lot of insecurities about the whole thing bc of some things she would say and do or not say and not do and i’d get like super uncomfortable or just sad really but also bc whenever the conversation would start to die out i was Absolutely Certain that she was gonna break up with me. it was pretty bad im not even joking. and like ofc my anxiety isnt her fault OR responsibility and like sure i still get anxious about cass sometimes but its not like that its basically just when she doesnt answer for a long time i think that something bad might have happened but even when my rude ass brain does try to tell me that she doesnt love me i KNOW that its not true, and that is a kind of peace that i have never ever had before. but anyways, so that was the good gf whose personality didnt fit mine and its weird now bc that is so obvious but i really didnt wanna believe it at the time even though i knew it wasnt gonna work out, but now its just really weird ngl (but i wont get into the why).

and now cass. wow okay let me tell you about cass. she is perfection. she is literally everything i have ever wanted AND things i didnt even know i wanted. she is everything no one else ever was and i just remembered that when we started dating in may i said that exact same sentence to abby. its just so true, she really is everything that no one else could be. because theyre not her. i’ve said this a lot of times but i really dont see how i could ever love anyone else after loving her, it just doesnt make sense to me because she really is like,, as good as it gets. there is no one better than her for me. we’re literally meant to be i s2g like when we broke up for a while i would tell everyone i wasnt really trying to move on at all bc i just hoped she would come back to me and i couldnt miss that chance. i knew she was my soulmate, although at some points i lost almost all hope (but never all) and i started thinking that maybe she was the love of my life but i wasnt the love of hers. and thats bc she really is everything ive ever dreamed of like she has all these little things that she does or say that sometimes wouldnt even mean anything to other people but to me they are So important bc theyre things ive dreamed about while my ex girlfriends ignored me akcjsjxn like, i was talking about how comfortable she feels to me and a big part of that comes from little things like the fact that even when we were just friends she would spam me when i was gone for a long time and that not only made me feel missed and appreciated but also it meant i could do that to her and it wouldnt be annoying bc she felt the same!! like, she missed me too! and me knowing that she actually Wanted to talk to me and the fact that she actually showed me she cared was super great when we started dating bc it made me feel like if i was feeling sad or insecure, i could literally just ask her to be a little more affectionate and it wouldnt feel fake bc i actually knew she cared. and you have No idea how much that meant to me bc i literally didnt know it was possible for me to feel that way. like honestly i thought it was an innate aspect of who i am that like if i asked for affection it would be meaningless? bc i’d be lowkey forcing the person to say something? but with her it felt different bc we had enough intimacy for me to feel comfortable enough to do that.

HOWEVER i never actually Had to do that bc i got insecure exactly once (1) on the first night we started dating back in may bc i didnt know how much she liked me and i was like in love with her so i thought she would think i was too much and then i told her i was sad and that i was gonna sleep and the next day when i woke up she said something along the lines of “how are you babe bc i remember you said you were sad last night and i couldnt stop thinking about it bc i want you to feel good all the time” and thats something so small but wow it just meant so much to me bc i would cry and beg any fucking force in the universe to make my last ex do Anything At All to try to make me Not Sad and it would be awful and i would feel so so unloved and then cass just said that and something clicked in me and i never doubted her feelings to an actual Meaningful extent while we’ve been together anymore (like ofc i get insecure sometimes and especially when we broke up, but while we have been dating ive never gotten like actually Sad™ specifically bc i wasnt sure she liked me) but it gets even better because some of the things she does are so so special that i never even imagined them like shes literally unreal, i literally never thought someone like her existed and its just so wild to me that i get to be with her.

and i know im saying a bunch of cliches but i mean it all so much like i remember when i was dating one of my exes i was learning her first language but she didnt try to learn mine and i really wished she would bc i just always loved the idea that someone would do that for me?? (and she was like the good gf so yknow,, just how that relationship literally did Not even compare to cass) and guess what yes cass is learning portuguese and its the cutest thing ever btw bUt the point is she does all the little things ive ever wanted in a partner (i literally have a post with a list of things i appreciate in a partner and she does all of them!! well, the ones that arent like irl or smth) also i literally have a draft in this blog that is a list of cute things cass has done/said that means a lot to me personally but i didnt post it yet ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ and like theres just so so many things that i havent talked about, like how im not even sure if i was ever in love with anyone of them anymore because what i feel for cass is just so different and so much more, or like how cass actually makes me want to try to get better, which ive never actually wanted before bc it always seemed to scary, like she literally makes me wanna be not only alive but also happy bc she makes me feel like i deserve it. she has been such a good influence on me and my mental health and thats so important and its the first time someone has been this good for me.

but anyways the point is that cass is right for me in every single way like she really is my other half she literally just is everything that she is and thats how shes different from my ex girlfriends.

#according to my girlfriend i spent over 2 hours writing this #AltHouGh #she DID distract me a few times bc she was being cute #and i love her #wow i love her #i know anon is definitely not gonna read this but my girl will alhajska #mine #answered #anon #luna

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sherokutakari · 6 years ago

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I’m gonna do something I never do, and that is write a reaction post for an entire goddamn season of Voltron. Spoilers will ensue.

Firstly and foremostly, I think we all need to heave a big ol’ ball of fuck you at the creators over Adam, and WHATEVER ship name you call him and Shiro by.

That was not representation

That was not “respecting your lgbt+ fanbase”

That was a straight up Bury Your Gays trope, and I am sick

Although if we’re being honest with ourselves, it can’t even really canonically be BYG at this point because

not

ONCE

was it even touched upon in the season that Shiro and Adam had been a couple. We had some heavily subtextual lines but had we not had direct confirmation outside of canon that Adam was Shiro’s ex, it would have just been another ship. Klance has more frequent and meaningful interactions. Shieth has more frequent and meaningful interactions. Hell, much as I hate Allurance personally, and as stunted and forced as that relationship is, even they have more frequent and meaningful interactions. Even goddamn Acxa/Kieth have more on-screen dialogue about romantic feelings than goddamn Adam/Shiro.

And I promise this reaction post won’t all be ship related, but on the subject, they did both Klance AND Allurance dirty, too

With Klance the hints and baiting from cast and crew are undeniable. Now being a pretty low-key Klance shipper, I have not compiled all the evidence thereof like so many other blogs have, but at the least

at the very least

we were told to expect more time for Kieth and Lance’s relationship to develop again, much like it had in season three. Outside of them saying each other’s names first in battles, we basically got diddly.

In fact, we got Lance saying Keith should be set free from their weird ass test because he’s an amazing leader, and half Galra, and called him the future. What a great start, right? And wow! Keith even also chose Lance!!!

... so that... he wouldn’t have to spend time with Lance ever again.

What in the actual hell?

Also wasn’t there an interview or something that said Keith and Lance got stranded on the astral plane while the rest of Team Voltron were “asleep for a long time”? Hope is in the stars? Et c. whatever??? Idek anymore. There’s so much crew talk involving Klance that I can’t remember even HALF of it at this point.

Anyway, ALLURANCE

I absolutely hate the idea of this ship just because of the lack of, or at best one-sided build up, but I know a ton of people were looking forward to it under the right circumstances

Something like Lance and Allura actually, I don’t know, talking to each other about this type of thing? The fallout of Allura’s relationship with Lotor? Lance maybe NOT taking an interest in Romelle just ‘cause she’s there?

But no, we got a suddenly blushy Allura, who had previously shown NO interest in Lance and in fact still chose Lotor over him after learning about Lance’s feelings, being all “come back safely~”, and then newly introduced characters having to be like OOOOOOH THE PRINCESS LIKES YOU TOO. I HAVE TO SAY THIS OUT LOUD OR THE AUDIENCE WILL NEVER BUY IT. THIS IS TOTALLY NATURAL.

Come on.

And correct me if I’m wrong, but wasn’t there something about Lance pairing up with someone who “isn’t what he wants (Allura since day one) but who he needs (shut up, we all have theories on who this is and I’m not fighting anyone over it,) so did they just drop that bit for him?

And what about Lance being Allura’s rebound being referred to by (I think) Joaquim as being “a disservice to both those characters”

Meanwhile Lance’s promised development has STILL

not

goddamn

come

We got him being very competent in battle and... still... being belittled by his teammates at every opportunity. Like ha ha I get it Lance is the cheap shot comic relief but all Lance really seemed to develop this season is a Millennial’s nihilisticly suicidal sense of humor. Which I mean #Mood but we still haven’t addressed Keith’s suicide attempt, and Lance has already DIED (and not talked about it,) and is making outright “Don’t worry, we’ll all be dead soon anyway” jokes. And when he and Veronica were about to die and Red saved him, that was just Red saving his Paladin like always, not Lance successfully calling him to Earth. (As evidenced by the other lions all lighting up and flying away, and the like two second shot of Red just... sitting there, entirely dark.)

Not only that but we’ve seem to gone backwards? Where was his sword Bayard, hm? Why did he unlock traditionally “Keith’s” weapon (albeit a different style sword,) if that wasn’t going to come into play once Keith was back?

and SPEAKING OF KEITH AND LACK OF DEVELOPMENT well firstly a pause, for the lovely Keith and Hunk scene. That was a long time coming and absolutely wonderful.

But suddenly Keith is just... IN leader mode? No adjustment period, no getting reacquainted with the rest of the team, not even a scene to talk with goddamn Shiro over being more willing and able to accept leadership. Two years in space with one other person and an animal, not matter how cool that animal is, does not suddenly a leader make. Oh, and there was no follow-up whatsoever on said two year time gap either, by the way.

And Krolia just leaving again, after making a big deal about not doing that again?? Like hey son we had a fun and terrifying vacation on an enormous space whale, but once again, mission above all else, peace out. They definitely couldn’t just bring Kolivan with them until he’d recovered and have a few scenes to put a proper plan in action that may still have had Krolia leave, but at least have it make sense. Nope, better just leave right now immediately while Kolivan is almost dead because there aren’t quite as many knives in this wall as their should be.

MEANWHILE, BACK AT THE RANCH GALAXY GARRISON, no one had ever thought about MAYBE defending the earth against POSSIBLE ALIENS when the Kerberos team disappeared!! We’ve known since season one they knew it wasn’t pilot error! We’re told this from the files Pidge is going through!!! WHY WAS AN ESTABLISHMENT CALLED THE GALAXY GARRISON SENDING PEOPLE ALL THE WAY OUT TO OUR FARTHEST PLANET, WITHOUT HAVING ANY SORT OF PLANETARY DEFENSES IN THE WORKS

But instead, let’s just macguffin our way out of danger for half a season straight.

Can’t fly the Galra pod Shiro crashed it? Or the Altean ship Sam brought?? No worries, we SOMEHOW got Navs up and running well enough to make simulators for how to fly them just in case

We have good pilots on the simulators now? Good thing Sam knows how to actually build the things!!

The ships are short range and burn through non-crystal powers quickly? GOSH if only we had some of the season’s first episode’s macguffin left HAHA JUST KIDDING WE DO

Need the Lions from four planets away? Now you can AAAAALL CALL YOUR LIONS, REGARDLESS OF BOND LEVEL OR THE FACT THAT ALLURA KNOWS HER BOND IS THE WEAKEST AND NOT YET UP TO PAR

The lions can come to you, but can’t actually do what you want them to? WHOOPS THEY CAN NOW, IF YOU JUST CONCENTRATE EVEN SUPER DUPER HARDER

Oh no, we built a giant ship! But it won’t!!! Run without a crystal!!!!! or like 7 super massive blackholes!!!!!!!!! Coran: CHECK OUT MY BLING

But Coran, your bling is too small! Look at how big the bling hole is, and your bling is just too smol! Bling: BITCH IT’S MAGIC

THE DEFLECTOR PLATES JUST HAPPEN TO HOLD OUT LONG ENOUGH FOR THE ATLAS TO GET IN PLACE

THE ATLAS’ SHIELDS JUST HAPPEN TO HOLD OUT LONG ENOUGH FOR THE LIONS TO DESTROY THE CANONS

SUDDENLY DUAL WIELDING VOLTRON

SUDDENLY SHIRO IS BASICALLY OLCARIAN BECAUSE OF HIS DOPE NEW FLOATATION DEVICE ARM

SUDDENLY ATLAS BECOMES ANOTHER GIANT ROBOT TO TAKE ON THE SMALLER GIANT ROBOT THAT JUST BEAT THE TITULAR GIANT ROBOT’S ASS

- d e e p b r e a t h -

Like don’t get me wrong, there was still a lot about this season I liked. I mean I stayed up just to finish watching it all the way through. But with how hyped it was, and honestly how positive the reviews mostly were, I was expecting a better. A lot better.

They did Adam dirty.

They did their (largely lgbt+) fanbase dirty, while patting themselves on the back for idk thinking they pulled another Korra? (Which, haha, no.)

They did lots of ships, characters, plot lines, and honestly their own universe dirty.

I’m hoping to hear more from the cast and crew soon, about things in this season, things in the upcoming season, and honestly just what the heck just happened. Because tbph? For once, Voltron has actually left a very bitter taste in my mouth.

And I want to believe they can fix it before it’s too late.

#Voltron #Voltron Legendary Defender #Voltron: Legendary Defender #VLD #Spoilers #Voltron Spoilers #Voltron Legendary Defender Spoilers #Voltron: Legendary Defender Spoilers #VLD Spoilers #Salty Tea #SalTea #if you will #Shut up Christi #I'm gonna go take a nap jesus

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maryellencarter · 6 years ago

Text

memed from @camshaft22 , originally an askbox meme but it's short enough that i can just have opinions at all of it rather than waiting to have the free time to get out of the house and answer asks. (i still have at least a few askmeme questions sitting in my inbox from like a month or two ago... :P)

1. do you find force users or non-force users more interesting? -- non-force users by a mile. there could theoretically be exceptions, like if anybody really got deeply into alternate perceptions / interpretations of the force rather than just kind of toeing the jedi party line as established in the movies, but i haven't seen any that really grab me.

2. which character do you want to be most like? -- oh, now there's a hell of a question. both this and the next one, really. see, let's start at the beginning: when i was a very smol tortoise watching a star war, and by smol i mean like eighteen because that's when i first saw a star war... when i was a smol, i wanted to be han solo (not least because he was hot in a very conventionally masculine way, do not underestimate the importance of that to a smol afab tortoise programmed with much body-loathing ;P), but i identified a lot more with chewbacca. i mean, let's be honest, i was not in great psychological shape as a tiny, and this particular oddment is something i'm still very much sorting out, but: from tiny!jt's perspective, at least, han+chewie is a nonromantic primary relationship that gets displaced by the han/leia primary romantic relationship. but it's still (from anything you see onscreen in the ot) primary *to chewie* even after it becomes secondary to han. that kind of nonreciprocal primary relationship, tagging around after someone who would let me express that kind of devotion and not find it creepy even after they inevitably found a "real", romantic relationship that would be more important to them than me, was the best endgame i could imagine for myself, and frankly i felt like it was way too much to hope for within my own species. i may have spent rather a while wishing i was a dog or something, so that it would be acceptable and appropriate for me to want the most important relationship in my life to be nonromantic. tiny!jt was a *mess*. this was way before i got into fandom, so i didn't really work through it at all or write it down anywhere, either.

uh. that got long. continued under the next question.

3. which character are you actually most like? -- so anyway. yeah. to continue. then i found my way into legends (then still the eu but yanno) and the x-wing books. and then there was wes. ^_^ it would be several more years before i even figured out i *had* ptsd, but here was somebody who had ptsd that presented almost exactly like mine but was also stable and functional and not-depressed and in fact actually cheerful. not to mention he was *also* hot and male and most importantly human, but still showed the kind of undemanding loyalty i was aiming towards, and had it accepted.

(which last is partly because wedge is an oblivious noodle, but still. ^_^ honestly that's probably something to analyze when i'm not one-finger typing on my phone: how much of that kind of relationship being a goal for me is just me being wired kind of subby, and how much is the abuse thing where asking for any kind of emotional reciprocation is Wrong and Too Much. :P)

uh. i had a point here somewhere. um. so i wanted to grow up to be wes, but i didn't think that was an attainable goal. i felt sort of more like wedge with the duty and guilt and everything, but wedge is also way more of a leader than i am, so that's a thing. honestly there was a point there where i felt most like cheriss, just kind of... trying to grow up and dealing with a whole bunch of life shit and intermittently wanting to die a lot. ;P

and now apparently i *am* growing up to be wes and i'm still not sure what to do with that, besides writing a lot of fanfic (which is what i am doing). and trying to figure out the whole subby brain thing. and the executive dysfunction thing. and the not wanting leadership positions thing. and still working on the ptsd thing. and the self-esteem thing. there's a lot.

i'm less wedge, though. which is good. less catholic guilt is always nice.

4. what headcanon will you defend to the death? -- er. i'm not really sure i have any of those. as opposed to just canon things i will make sure people remember and acknowledge. maybe the hoth cuddle pile? you will never convince me the rogues on hoth did not sleep in a giant cuddle pile.

5. what planet would you most like to visit? -- i frankly don't know enough about star wars planets to give a shit.

6. what planet would you most like to live on? -- ditto. not taanab, for sure. mini rancors (and possibly 46-hour days if you don't just disdain that as illogical made-up numbers they threw into the planet guide for variety's sake... ;P I have opinions)

7. who do you hope you never meet? -- of the characters? pretty much any of the bad guys, but my first thought is vader.

8. what is one thing you would change about any movie, show, book, etc? -- ahahahahaaaaaaa. just one? i can't pick. can i say fix all the things about tlj that made me go "okay never watching that"? because there were at least four or five just among the spoilers that i heard. like if it had to be just one i'd make it so poe doesn't disregard chain of command, because that's the one that's making it so i can't rewatch tfa *either*, but from everything i hear, that movie was a hot mess. (alternatively, can i just change the fandom so that people stop saying "if you don't love tlj unquestioningly you're a reddit douchebro!"? because i don't want to unfollow roguepod on twitter but unless i block literally everyone *they* follow there's no way for me to keep that particular Hot Take off my dash and it's consistently re-infuriating me. :P)

uh. i have feelings, apparently. ;P

9. have you ever made fanart or fanfic? do you make edits or any other fan content? -- so much fanfic. so much. i counted last night and just the fics i haven't published yet add up to somewhere around 80k words.

10. do you think the jedi were right or wrong? -- i think the jedi were self-important douchenozzles with a habit of being wrong whenever the plot demanded it. is this a reference to something specific they were right or wrong about? i don't think they have the one true view of the force, and i think they're obnoxious about thinking they do, much like many other religions, so there's that.

11. who is the most underrated character? -- new canon, finn. or rose, possibly, not that i've seen her, because see above re hot mess. old canon, hobbie.

12. do you care who rey’s parents are? -- honestly, i'm at the point in dealing with an open canon where i cannot give fuck about any of the unanswered questions, the upcoming releases, or anything that might happen in the future at all. i haven't even read thrawn alliances. i am Over It, and that is about 99% the fault of the people who keep calling me a reddit douchebro by association. i probably won't see epIX unless kat or sophia tells me i absolutely have to. i'm a legends-only fan at this point. i didn't want to be, i like getting excited about new things, but every time i try it, people are douchewaffles and it's depressing. :P

13. if you could resurrect one dead character, or prevent them from dying, who would it be? -- new canon, hobbie. old canon, there are so damn many options, but probably mara or pellaeon.

14. what is your favorite alien species? -- i'm not sure i actually have an opinion. i have lots of favorite alien characters but like... idek. star wars has a bunch of really well designed alien species and they're all cool.

15. who would you like to bang? -- honestly i don't really care about banging any of the characters. shipping them is more fun. although i would let princess general leia step on me, whether in a sexy way or not.

16. which movie/episode have you watched the most? -- probably anh. the falcon's flying sfx aren't as good as in esb, but if you watch esb without rotj it's just a downer, and i don't really enjoy rotj. like it just doesn't click with me.

17. what is your favorite line? -- uh. from the movies, or from all the star war? uh. either way that's a hell of a question. the one i quote the most from the movies is definitely "we're all fine here, how are you?", but that's more just... versatile. from the books, my favorite is obviously one of allston's, but i'm not sure i could *pick*.

18. what is your favorite star wars book or comic? -- starfighters of adumar. because it is the best one. objectively. ^_^

19. what’s your opinion on legends/expanded universe? -- i'm extremely glad it isn't canon anymore (see also my issues with open canons, but also a significant amount of it was just trash) and extremely glad it's still around.

20. what do you hope will happen in future movies? -- i have no hope. hope is dead. i am, as previously mentioned, Over It. (let oscar isaac kiss john boyega onscreen)

21. if you could switch any character’s gender, who would it be and why? -- in canon? no. there's no point in turning a lady character into a dude, and neither the creators nor the fans are capable of handling anyone who's currently a dude being written as a lady or nb type, even if it was retroactive and they'd always been written that way. just no. it would go Badly. :P

that said. in fanfic? and i am so not capable of writing this yet but i want to. in like five years when we're all living in caves scratching our fanfics on bone. i want to see a cis afab wes janson who just hasn't internalized any of those lessons about not taking up space. who's still brash and loud and enthusiastic and flirtatious and just... female. who doesn't feel any need to explain that she doesn't (or does) want kids, or acknowledge anybody else's opinion about how she dresses or who she fucks. who's smart and badass and competent and out to have fun. and like... *pulls hair* i mean you know the trope. a sexy lady character who knows she's sexy will pretty much always at least consider sleeping her way to the top or whatever. (tim zahn, seriously, stop using that trope. it's not edgy.) i want to see lady!wes dressing up all fancy because it's fun and she enjoys having people admire her body, and like just... not even considering ever having sex for any other reason than "i am attracted to that person, i wonder if they'd like to bang". like it's hard to demonstrate a negative but you know if you read a story like that, where it wasn't called out but just there, your brain would go all fidgety and "what the fuck something is not normal here". or at least mine would. but you know? :S apparently i have a lot of feelings about this too. like trying to portray a lady who's that confident and... and undamaged by misogyny, would be a hell of a thing.

22. favorite droid? -- bb-8. the cutest smol. target has a kit to turn a pumpkin into a bb-8 and i swear i'm thinking about getting a funkin to do that to. even though i already have a bb-8 penny bank and a bb-8 lanyard in storage.

23. what’s your favorite star wars musical piece or theme? -- i'm not great at identifying pieces of music so i'm just gonna go with the opening crawl music.

24. how do you pronounce twi’lek? -- i don't. ^_^ more specifically, i do kind of pronounce it in my head when i read, but it's sort of... neither twee-lek nor twye-lek, but something sort of in between that isn't quite a schwa and might involve an umlaut. Sort of Twülek, if you said it with an Austrian accent. That probably doesn't help at all. XD

25. which character do you have a love/hate relationship with? -- This keeps being a question. I'm honestly not sure I *do* love-hate relationships. I'm like Tinkerbell, I only have room for one emotion at a time. ^_^ Especially with fictional characters, I either love them or hate them. (Unless they're completely meh and I just forget about them, that happens sometimes.)

#star wars #rogue squadron #wes janson #i have a lot of feelings #im not sure if i should tag this as tlj critical or not #like it is but i dont want to draw the people who lurk in that sort of tag

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asreoninfusion · 7 years ago

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ALL THAT IS IS SO FRICKEN CUTE I LOVE IT. TELL ME MORE!! :D I WANT TO HAVE A FULL REPORT! XDD!!

Ahahahaha, okay. I’ll do one big explanation of everything that went down for you guys (as much as I can, I tried explaining it to my mum and she was very confused) and then I think it’ll be time for me to call it a day and stop harping on about the show stuff in general. ^^;;

I do apologise for this slight deviation in content, we’ll be returning to your regularly scheduled FFVII blogging shortly. And I’ll keep all the youtube-related stuff on the sideblog I created just for that purpose, I don’t know why I’m so bad at keeping things where they’re meant to be.

Also this will probably get super long, so under the cut we go. (Also beware spoilers for the Markiplier show!!! If anyone’s worried about that.)

Hoo boy. Okay. Where do we start, howmuch detail do you want? xD Are we talking just the going on stage part all thewhole evening?

(I’m going to go for mainly just the on stage part because I’ve left it very late alreadyfor answering this and I need to sleep. >>)

But!! The day was pretty hectic cause Ihad 9am to 2pm straight lectures and labs, and then took a taxi straight to thestation and left for Nottingham then, which meant I had to do my lab in mypoofy dress. xD So that was amusing to start with.

Got to Nottingham, checked into my hotel(such a sweet glory to have a proper hotel room all to myself compared to thehostel I had for Manchester, aaahh), then went pretty much straight to thevenue from there after dumping all my stuff.

I was weak and bought too much merch. I’dalready bought one of the beanies in London, so I thought this time I’d justbuy a sticker set and some badges, that’s pretty cheap right? Well, yes. Thosewere. Until I stood in the queue for too long looking at the merch and beingmore and more tempted by one of the hoodies. I didn’t buy it originally, butthen I gave in and went back for it because I have no self-control lol.

There was the VIP section! Mark’s beenill for like, most of the tour thus far, and for a while his voice was totallygone. Poor dude. Normally he sings in the VIP section, and he did most of hissongs for the Nottingham one. I posted a video of a section of one!! There wereone or two songs he didn’t do because his range wasn’t back up to 100% justyet, but that just meant we got a bit longer for Q&A stuff.

(Uuugh every time I see how far he’s comemusically it reminds me how much I love singing to myself and writing dumbsongs and I want to do things too. ;^; It was a fit of inspiration afterwatching Mark before that led to me buying my whole mic set up I have.)

So then there’s a break between the VIPpre-show and the main show while everyone else comes in and I hung aroundsinging obnoxiously to myself the whole time because Mark put in the mood forsinging oops.

Then the main show!! The way the show is structured is that it’sthe same games and stuff each time, but there’s three different themes thatthey can go with for the show, and the theme is determined at the start. Themethod of determination is that there’s cases you have to pick from, kind of like a deal or nodeal style. Mark and Bob chose a case each (marking their choices with a redor green sticky respectively), and then the audience had to decide who theyagree with via the application of these coloured paddles they give out wheneveryone’s entering the theatre; hold up the colour you want to vote for. Butthe boys are cheaty mc cheatfaces and will never go with what the audiencewants. xD They have to pick one person out of the audience to make the finaldecision. (That was me!!!)

Also the final decision is made by stabbingthe holder of the case you don’t want with a foam sword.

(We got the horror theme for theNottingham show. :D)

I chose Bob’s box and didn’t stab Tyler,so I got to sneak in a hug from him for that. x3 But I also got put in thepunishment corner for not listening to Mark (not complaining 👀). Regardless of the decision, the gag is that Bob decides totry and take over the show anyway by kidnapping Tyler. Ethan and Wade came inas the inept henchmen dressed in ridiculous costumes, and then it was Mark andI, armed with swords, against the others in a stupid slowmo staged sword fightand honestly idek it was the most fucking surreal thing I’ve ever done in my life.

(I found this photo on Twitter!! Creditto Craig Frewey for it.)

So that was how I ended up having a veryone-sided swordfight with a shark??? xD

Man, I hope there’s video of this becauseit’s REALLY HARD TO EXPLAIN WTF WAS EVEN HAPPENING.

Anyway, I rescued Tyler! But while I wasbusy slaying the shark and stealing the golden key of rescue, Bob went and tookMark hostage instead and then I had to choose between saving Tyler or savingMark. Like goddamn, stop giving me so many impossible choices. D:

I may have eeny meeny miny mo’d it.

(But tbh I did kind of want to save Markmore anyway I’m so sorry Tyler but if I had to pick a favourite…… anyway, Iscrewed Mark over earlier not choosing his case, so making it even? xD)

Also look at this fucking pouty babytrying to make me feel bad and convince me to save him.

(Photo from this photoset here, credit to @giggles3475!)

You deserve only to be saved by atechnicality of eeny meeny miny mo, sir.

Anyway, since I saved Mark, I got to goon a ‘date’ with him; got invited for a candlelit dinner loooool. This is theonly date my aroace ass will accept, I’m good for life now. xD

((One day I want to have thisconversation:Someone: You’ve never had a relationship?You’ve never dated? :0Me: Well there was this one time I had a fakestage date with Markiplier…))

Anywho, the point of that is that it’s anopportunity for Mark to ask a bunch of questions(or Tyler in other cases if the poor sod who gets calledup to take part in this ridiculousness saves Tyler instead), because the next part of the show is that they make an improvisedmusical about that person’s life! ….and I have a fuckin’ weird life.

So Mark started asking me questions aboutwhat I did and stuff, what my poofy dress was all about (‘cause I’d dressed upin my pretty Lolita dress just because why not I never get the chance to dressup), it was all relatively normal at first.

Oh, and Mark asked me if I was seeing theshow with friends or family or anyone; I was just like “nope, I’m here alonelike a sad loser!” and apparently that’s the line that people liked ‘cause I’veseen it quoted somewhere in the tags and in the discord server I’m on inseparate incidences. xD (Mark’s reply was a highly cheerful “alone like a sadloser? Me too!” bless him.)

So it started off normal but then oncethe crocodiles came up… that just got even more surreal, ahahaha. I bet Mark’snever heard that one before. And I did the ‘born in England, moved toAustralia, moved back to England, moved to Australia, back to England again,and then we were in India for a while too…’ spiel that is the quickest way Ican summarise all the back and forth we’ve done. That got brought up in a song.In the most ridiculous way possible fuckin’ honestlyI was just crying over in my corner.

Tiny snippet of that:https://twitter.com/LilyRooney31/status/966821044739854336

And then my poor dear sister, I said shewas my favourite ‘cause she’s cute, she got a skit about her and somehow itended up in a song about pants??? xD Also my mum is apparently now a spy. Thesethings just happen.

There’s a bunch of footage starting fromthe end of the first musical bit and the whole of the second part here: https://www.pscp.tv/w/1djxXdaZXmjxZ

(In the very last few seconds of thatvideo in the side of the screen there’s a me!! I got to hug Mark!!)

I’m slightly worried though that everyonein the audience might think I was bullshitting about a lot of the stuff I said,like I was making stuff up to try and make myself seem cooler?? ‘Cause who the fuckhas crocodiles?? Apart from my freakin’ family. Honestly if I was gonna lie Iwould’ve made it more believable. xD

So, yeah!!! That was what I got to do onstage. I don’t think I embarrassed myself hideously at any point, probably someminor awkwards but I got through it okay. I’m just absolutely fucking kickingmyself now that I had the opportunity rightthere, but I was so worried about not messing it up and like, ‘performing’for the audience that I was hardly paying attention to Mark. There was just. Alot happening. @_@ I feel like I barely even looked him in the eye throughoutit ‘cause I was like what the fuck do I focus on should I try to talk to theaudience so they can see what’s happening? (‘Cause during the sitting downtalking thing if I’d turned to look at Mark properly my back would’ve beentowards the audience, and that seemed rude to them then, so I ended up with akind of sideways thing looking at neither. orz) I feel like I was up there onstage with Mark, but I never talked tohim, if that makes sense?

I really want to find more videos andphotos of my part because it’s still so surreal I’m like wait what did thateven really happen??? I did give my email address to someone who said they hadvideo of the date section so I’m really looking forward to that, and I knowsomeone else has photos, so it should be all good on that front! I needevidence that it wasn’t all just a weird fever dream. I mean. I did have aswordfight with a shark so the fever dream thing is always a possibility.

But anyway. xD That was only the firstpart of the whole show!! I’ve already written and entire damn essay trying toexplain how things went down, so I’m not going to expand on all the otherimprov games they played, but it was a really good time watching the rest of ittoo, and then hanging with people outside, and getting Taco Bell on the wayback to the hotel.

I did not get nearly enough sleep becausehow the heck could I sleep after that I was too pumped, I didn’t fall asleepuntil like three in the morning. And now it’s 1am again ‘cause I spent waaaaaytoo long typing this up, and I reallyneed the sleep, so.

If anyone actually read all that, Isalute you, and also dear god what are you doing with your life.

Lol, but thanks for asking about itAisha! :D

#rp-sephiroth #personal dumbassery #adventures in real life #the tale of that time i had a fake stage date with markiplier #xD #oh man but it was a good time #fuckin' surreal #but a good time #now to the goddamn sleep @_@

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survivor-tierradelfuego · 4 years ago

Text

Ep. 10: “Not all hero’s wear capes, some wear pajama pants and robes!” - Cody

Amy A

Everything worked out PERFECTLY. Ugh I love a good plan. Hopefully my new core 4 plus Najwah stays in power.

Olivia A

WHAT THE HELL!! Grae was my closest ally this is so disappointing. On top of everything, Aimee didn’t even vote with us!! So we’re at a 6-4 disadvantage. I don’t think anyone wants to work with us. Our last hope is finding and buying the idols and utilizing Kalle’s fake idol. I hate this.

Pedro A

woke up on the bottom...and thinking i was going home...guess what...im still here ahahahhahahahahahahhhaahhah...yall though...kalle is my guardian angel ...like if it wasnt for that girlll i would be out

ben kessler

Wednesday, July 29th, immediately after the tribal grae got voted out: heheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheh

Aimee

I had a long day and now Grae is gone. I’m honestly crying. Jay asked if I was okay and the river of tears just started flowing. I only knew Grae for a short while and really wanted to get to know them more. They brought such a beautiful, fun and loving energy to this game. Grae, I really am going to miss you. I’m just gonna go hug a stuff animal.

Maddison

I knew Pedro was going to play an idol. He didn’t do one single puzzle, it’s obvious he felt safe. Snakes are slithering.

Kalle N.

I truly cannot believe that our plan worked but it did and my splitting headache is totally worth it. I really feel like I deserve an Emmy or an Oscar for my performance with Maddison and Olivia after tribal but it's fine. I have absolutely no idea what comes next but boi will it be messy. I'm so sorry it had to be Grae but I didn't know what else to do. Also I hate that I'm working with Ben but don't worry I will use my chaotic energy to go against him eventually. I will now be erasing myself from the narrative and taking a break for several hours. Thank you for coming to my TED Talk.

Najwah

OK last night's tribal was wiiiiiiild af. I think the funniest part is that this all started with me planting a seed. I told Amy L that she is at the bottom of their alliance and that I was open to working with her to get Maddison out. She spilled all the tea about Maddison having two idols and that she's been wanting to gether out for a while bc she says the same thing to everyone lmao. I think the thing that pissed Amy off is that she told her "I feel closest to you" anyway, Amy didn't respond to me immediately so I thought she wasn't on board at first so I told Cody I'd work with him and that I have the idol from Alan. Ffs. Wrong move. Cody just trust other people wit information and it's really annoying. While I love Sarah, I can't really trust her bc she's really close to Ben and Aimee - who I do not trust. Well, Aimee I am not sure about. I guess I only don't trust her because of her close Ness to Ben and Ben blatantly lies. Anyway. So Amy told me that their alliance is still trying to vote Pedro which is perfect for us coz we can still stay Hanúha strong. So at this point I realise I wouldn't have to play my super idol and Cody wouldn't have to play his extra vote. Anyway. Amy tells Kalle about the plan to get Maddison out. I send Amy a long ass message Pedro sent Zack that Zack sent me. She tells her group that Zack had sent it to her, to solidify their vote for Pedro. And then She, Kalle, Ben and Pedro form an alliance and they pull off one of the most epic blindsided. I mean, wow. Amy told me beforehand so I saw it coming and I told Cody about it too. Lmao but Ccody just can't be low key he wrote something about Maddison's two idols and he asked in the Old Hanúha group whether anyone had known about the plan lmao obviously Ben was like "no" and wtf. Ben's facial expressions at tribal was hilarious especially because I know he careful conducted this whole genius plan. I mean people still think their alliances are with their alliances and that no one has moles but there are so many layers right now and there are a few moles.

Cody just needs to shut up. Be like Ben who claims that everything he is doing is for James lmao but is in a secret alliance with the person that got James out lmao love it. I love that I can see through some of the BS right now. The only person that could fuck up my game is Cody atm but I am taking a leap of faith and trusting him. He needs to trust me too. I kept telling him to just trust the process last night and he kept freaking out. I think the realisation of Ben being a BSer got to him a bit. Also, he toldd Sarah that I spoke to Amy? Like I'm so fkn mad. Can he just shut up? Ugh that's my biggest problem right now. I LOVE CODY OMG WE SPEAK ON VIDEO CALL LIKE EVERY HOUR LMAO but I'm just scared that he is too trusting with certain people, especially at this point in the game. He also doesn't know how to be low key lmao which is kinda funny. Also, Pedro. Wev ebeen talking a lot. Pedro's friggin Greek they're speech and the vote with Grae that ended with "sorry not sorry" just. Lmao. I wish I watched this on TV. I'm sad that it happened via skype😂😂 also I am not sure how this VL confession thing works. Did I say the right things? Yall probably have all the tea already. I'm a little sad that Grae went home. She seemed genuinely nice but she was our only option because Olivia won immunity. Maddison also made us all uncomfortable coz she took the time to chat to none of the new people at merge. Like? Olivia and Grae made the effort. She just seems too safe. Too comfortable. She isn't even participating in this challenge. Is she THAT comfortable or just pissed? Who knows? Never keep to yourself like that. It makes people suspicious. Pedro does seem very smart and manipulative though and I will be weary of him. Let's go idol hunting then woohoo.

Najwah

Also I keep laughing at how ridiculously bad I am at answering questions at tribal. Omg. Embarrassing. I need like a few minutes to THINK. I always look back, and wonder why tf I said what I said. In retrospect, I'd answer last night's question with "don't we all feel like we are on the outs?" ugh. I'm so bad at it. I realise it makes me look dumb and perhaps that's not a bad thing. I don't mind looking dumb tbh. Lmao.

Cody A.

I haven’t done one of these written confessions in a while! Obviously things have been absolutely fish crazy. Idek what fish crazy means but it just came to me. And on the topic of fish... I’m pretty positive I called Maola a bunch of sharks at tribal council.

If it wasn’t for Naj last night, I would have been completely blonde sided by the vote. I had no idea what was going on, I thought the plan was to put votes on Pedro and Madison and one of them would go.

About 20 minutes before tribal naj called me and said she did not want me to feel left out of the events that were about to occur. She told me the real plan of Pedro and Madison both playing idols and Pedro casting the sole vote on Grae. Not going to lie I was scared shitless... I was so close to writing kalles name as a safety net for myself. What if Pedro would’ve cast the sole vote against me? At the very least it would’ve been a 1-1 tie between myself and kalle. I just didn’t want to be Denise’d out of this game.

Ultimately I trusted my gut which told me to just trust naj. If I had got fucked over last night, at least I would’ve went out trusting the right people. Naj also told me about a 4 person alliance between Amy, Pedro, Kalle, and BEN... My Ben!!! Smh. So moving forward I have to be very careful with the information I give and receive from Ben which sucks because I thought I could trust him more :/ Basically THANK THE LORDT FOR NAJ. Not all hero’s wear capes, some wear pajama pants and robes!

Kalle N.

So this entire time that I've worked with Ben, he always dictates our moves and every single thing I can or can't say to certain people. If I suggest something he immediately turns it down and will only do what he wants. Men are the worst. Anyways, a little bit ago after he told me what our next move is and didn't let me have any input, he suddenly said "Actually what do you want to do? You go ahead and tell me what you want". That is EXTREMELY sus and makes me think that he's just trying to make me feel better while he's secretly plotting against me. I could go along with it and just let him vote me out bc honestly I'm exhausted, or I could reveal all of the insanity that happened in the last vote to my other alliance and then expose him to his own tribe for working with me. Which would get him voted out. But that's a lot of work so I'm ngl I'm leaning towards just getting voted out myself

Aimee

I’m so glad I’m not actually on an island playing real life Survivor right now. I would constantly be in the ocean or somewhere in the bushes bawling my eyes out. And then coming back to camp like, “oh hey guys! No puffy face here, I promise! Yeah everything is peaches! Hanuha strong! Those red eyes are just from too much sun, I think I need to lay down in the shade” I’m not crying over Grae and how shitty I was to Maddison or anything, JayKay I totally am! I hate that I didn’t tell Maddison the votes were going her way. I’m not even sure why I didn’t. I’m so sorry Maddison, I really hope we can rebuild our connection and work together again. I just feel like barf and am exhausted. Trying to play this game with a full time job is tough. I hope I have the emotional fortitude to pick myself back up and put on a poker face. The last thing I need is anyone figuring out my tells and knowing what I am up to. I want to work with Ben and Maddison the most at this point. I hope I can make that work out.

Pedro A

I'm honestly scared...for the next tribal ...I feel like everyone is gonna go after me...cause apparently I'm the villan lol

Kalle N.

It's a little hard to focus on the game at the current moment bc an exciting/terrifying development may be occurring in my life in the next couple of days. I'm having a prolonged anxiety attack. We were going to try to take out Aimee so F's in the chat to pay respect. Don't know what I'll be doing. Need to go cry in the shower now.

Najwah

Sigh. It's been a very long day. I really played hard at this challenge, knowing I have a 15% DA. Do I think it's insane that someone came into the game when half the players had already been eliminated and over half the 24 hours had already passed only to NOT even try to eliminate the one person not in our alliance in there, then pretend it's all kumbaya and eliminate our alliance (who we said we won't eliminate, we made a pact?) one by one? I mean yeah it's damn insane. And not that I'm a sore loser or anything, but I wish she'd have been there when things were actually heated and when everyone else was putting in the hard work. This isn't endurance in my opinion. This is coming into a game late and reaping all the benefits. However, well done on her tactic. Love it honestly. I think she made good moves and knew when to strike and for that, of course I think she's a fkn Queen. Even though I felt as though I was so close to winning immunity, even though I tried really hard. At the end of the day, it's how you outwit and outlast your opponents. Next time I'll be sure to not read challenge rules at 4am and then try to actually understand the game properly and how I too, can make things easier for myself dammit coz I think i keep making everything so hard for myself in this game ugh. I just need one fucking WIN. Goodness I am playing so hard. Wow. Wow. Starting to wonder what panderosa is like lol must be fun. Anyway I need to sleep coz the sleep deprivation is making me feel sick af and making me paranoid about having corona.

Aimee

https://lovelyygifss.tumblr.com/post/618070044309700608/deserved-more-than-0-votesssss QUEEN SARAH!!!!!!! 👑 ♥️ This challenge proved to me so much that Sarah is in it for the long haul with me! I could tell she was never guessing for my word and I wasn’t trying hers. Team Casanova is once again coming up equal on all challenges and I love to see it! I can’t believe I got to have my Michele moment and come from behind after being hours behind in the challenge and eliminating the last three people in a row to kick down that damn puzzle! I am on such an adrenaline rush!!! After the low lows of last night this rollercoaster of game really proves you can get right back up and thrive! Haha it was so hard saying my word since I’m a pretty positive person and my word was “not.” Sarah and I never gave up in this challenge and we ended up being the last two remaining!!! I also really bonded with Najwah and Cody. That challenge was so much more than immunity it was also a great opportunity to bond with cast mates and I really capitalized on that. Even during this challenge I patched things up with Maddison too and it seems like we are back to trying to make things work with us. I feel like Grae would want that for both of us too. I went from crying my eyes out the night before to total redemption today. It was on my bucketlist to win an individual immunity and I did it on something I never knew I could win. I’m just so amped and trying to calm myself down. I’m just https://youtu.be/erG5rgNYSd Wheeler island in the sun The song I was listening to when I won immunity. 🎃🐻🌈🍑❤️💜🧡💛

Sarah

There have been so many things that have happened today... This morning Ben, Naj, and I gave Cody enough coins for him to hopefully get the idol. Cody showed me what was in the store and how there were two necklaces for $20 which was odd. He got one of the necklaces and we thought it was a real idol. Tbh we still don’t know if it’s a real idol. Cody sent a fake message to Ben and I showing that it was a “fake idol” (he got the message from Naj when she had found a fake idol). We thought it was real but when Cody found it it said “what seems to be an idol,” which makes me think someone planted a fake idol there and he did get a fake idol. I will send in more soon...

Najwah

I thought that making it to merge would be enough for me lol but somehow my goal is just to get further now. I'm at a crossroads though bc there is no one I really want to get out or back stab or whatever. Cody found a supposed idol yesterday. I told him just to tell Ben it's a fake idol and if Ben wanted to use the fake idol, he could give him my idol. Thing is, Cody is paranoid about it being a real idol or fake one that he found. I think he should just chill about it and it'll be fine. I just want Cody to be calm, I feel like without Zack's constant talking and scheming, the silence is getting to him a bit. But I quite like the silence. He thinks it means something is happening or people are plotting against him. I just think it means people are trying to sleep lol. I mean even if he was a target, he still has an idol. Ugh. Anyway it's actually a religious holiday for me today and tomorrow. So I will spend time with my husband and perhaps go to a fancy restaurant or something. I haven't felt fancy in so long and I realised everyone in this game has really seen gross, messy haired, late night Najwah lmao like I usually don't even let my friends see me this way

Najwah

It's silly trying to keep wondering who tf I can trust. I need to just go with my gut. There are a few people in the game I really like. Cody, Sarah, Amy, Pedro and Aimee. I don't know the rest and I don't trust Ben. I don't know what he's up to. He was supposed to be in some secret alliance with Kalle and Amy but he told Cody and I about them so what's really happening? Who knows? Also he keeps asking me what do I want to do who do I want out? Lmaoooooooooo.

Najwah

We had a lot of deep, crazy conversations yesterday and one of my favs were actually drooling over survivor players and realising how gay everyone is lmao. I love that. As someone who has struggled with my sexuality for most of my life, thinking I'm gay for a long time and then finding myself attracted to boys too was bizarre in the early 2000s. and being told being bisexual is a "phase" or "confusion" or that it was bc I went to an all girls school (shout out to Rhenish girls High), being in a space where everyone is really open and accepting of all this is amazing. I'm happy i live in a country where gay marriages have been legal since 2006 and ironically being trans or gay is not that big of a deal here as it is in countries way more progressive than ours. I still struggle with non binary pronouns but I am learning thanks to this game. I feel free just being who I am, whoever tf that is in this game. And for that I'm obviously very thankful. Today, I'm married to a man who appreciates my sexuality and is open to me exploring it even more. Its been a long journey and it makes me extremely happy seeing people in this game, so much younger than me and so much more sure of themselves. I'm happy that they will be spared a lot of pain and confusion. I love GenZ. I love that they just are who they are and there is no pretense. This Is so important and a luxury previous generations could only dream. Of.

Sarah

From two nights ago.... https://youtu.be/uebz8rVKNbg https://youtu.be/xQyiuiGeEpo

Olivia A

Our plan for this vote feels really ambitious but I think it’s gonna work. We’ll likely get the numbers back :)

Maddison

I’m going to have to use my advantage tonight to save my ass. Guess that’s what advantages are for, eh?

Ben Kessler

I am trying to vote kalle out. If it works, my name will be out there but it may pay off. Maddison and Olivia are definitely going for me which is fine. I need to tell Pedro 5 minutes before tribal to trust me.

Kalle N.

Maddison will use her advantage, Olivia will play my idol, the only votes that will count will be the votes we put on Cody. That's it that's the plan

Cody A.

https://youtu.be/PuZChTTJzzU

Pedro A

Okay so me olivia kalle and amy are voting cody...plus maddison will leave tribal......and olivia will play the idol kalle has....i swear if olivia votes for me...and i go HOMEEE....IM DONEE...i have a bad feeling about this tribal...im trusting the devil lol

Olivia A

Kalle has been playing double agent this whole time and told everyone about the safety without power advantage grrr what a mess

Maddison

I’m making a big move tonight and I’m not sure yet how it will pan out.

Olivia A

Kalle has been playing double agent this whole time and told everyone about the safety without power advantage grrr what a mess

Olivia A

Initially we were going to all (Maddison, Cody, Najwah, Sarah, Aimee, and I) vote Ben but we are going to switch it to Kalle because Aimee and Ben are kinda close and we want to keep Aimee as a number. I’m happy to see Kalle go after how much she has lied to Maddison and me.

Olivia A

I am SO nervous for this vote. Here is the whole plan: Maddison will play her safety without power advantage and I will play the (fake) idol that Kalle gave me. This is just so that Kalle doesn’t get tipped off that we know about her lies. Kalle believes Maddison, Amy, and I are voting for Cody and think that she is voting for him as well. In reality, Cody, Aimee, Sarah, Najwah, Amy, and I are voting for Ben. We suspect Ben, Kalle, and maybe Pedro are voting for me and expect it to work because of the fake idol that Kalle planted. I really hope this works because if people are lying then I’m definitely going home.

Ben Kessler

Dearest confessional, My life is out on the line. I am in a very vulnerable position right now and if I stay in the game tonight damage control must be done. There are many complicated plans and I work best under chaos, so these votes are hopefully good for my game overall. If kalle actually gives her idol to Olivia and we vote out kalle, maddison and Olivia and Amy will be pissed, but they do not have the numbers. I would need to do some more work to make sure I get the info that kalle is currently giving me, but it's not as bad as going farther with kalle and then losing later on. I now need to video call kalle goodbye.

#episodes

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