#(HAH i found your ask again!! yay)

[deltastorm101]

Hi! Do you have any tips or info on how you made Zane's spiral painting? I'm thinking of trying to replicate it too! Thanks!

oh hey, yeah sure!! :D

how 2 spiral 101:

SO. first i was looking at references, most of which were, of course, screenshots from room 665 party; i don't think i have those anymore but 0.25x speed and frame by frame search is your friend.

i settled on a 50x70cm regular canvas and bought two small tubs of acrylic paint, one black one white, and a wide brush because i didn't have one. in hindsight i should have probably gone with a bigger canvas (and maybe even a square one? or something like 90x80?) but i was hit with a random burst of energy and i just wanted to get started without my usual ridiculous amount of planning that makes me afraid to start anything.

i painted the canvas with two layers of black (almost completely undiluted) on the same evening, with about 2h to dry in between. then i was looking at where exactly the 'arms' of the spiral originated (from the center and then downwards) and how many turns/loops it had (4.5, plus 3 corners). after that, of course, i was too scared to start painting, or even sketching, the spiral right away so i wanted to determine the exact placement of the pattern by putting some kind of cord or string on the canvas first; i decided on shoelaces, worked out great, looked like this:

then i carefully traced it all onto the canvas with a pencil, fleshed out the thickness of the arms and marked where to put the little gaps and effects:

then everything after that was pretty much improvised. i worked with solid white strokes in thick areas, left gaps where i had marked them, added some roughness (mid-size brush, very little paint and very dry) and extra strokes (thin, semi-dry brush) where needed. the arms get thicker towards the corners and the roughest, most 'blurry' parts are on the bottom left. it took me some time to get a clear view of the bottom right and center right area because that’s where zane stood in a lot of the screenshots i took but i did find a good shot somewhere. i'd say the hardest part was balancing the messiness – i wanted it to look just chaotic enough to resemble the original without having it look sloppy and ugly and like i learned to hold a brush 5 minutes ago. i slowly worked my way around and around, perfecting the loops until i was semi-happy with the overall look and how it looked from afar. right at the end i added a few stray dots here and there – i thought i saw some black ones in the center area and white ones in the outer areas so that’s where i put them.

i guess going the extra mile to make this as true to the original as possible would be to look for a similar frame like zane has. an olive-ish color or dark brown painted wood with a slightly shiny (or even glossy) finish maybe. but i decided against that because it would have greatly overcomplicated things i was happy with already, and i wouldn't know how to frame a 1.5cm thick canvas anyway. but maybe with one of those extra thin ones? i saw some of those at the arts and crafts store i went to but they all weren't big enough.

hope this is what you were looking for, happy painting!!

[mrs-bluemarine]

Im sure for most pocky day is over but NOT FOR ME. I'm pretty sure the year I started selfshipping my first fic ever was a pocky day one shot for Jay Kay and Weather, and I was just inspired to relive the day with them again >:3 maybe tmrrw I'll find the old fic to compare them. Anyway yay JayWeather shenanigans <3

“You found what?”

Weather Report watched the blonde with interest, seeing as she looked much more excited than normal, a thin white box in hand. Hearing his question, she grinned.

“C'mon, have you never heard of a pocky stick? They're so tasty! Even snagged a box of cookies and cream, they're my favorite!”

She seemed to forget which convict she was talking to. With a groan, Weather sat down on the piano bench, suddenly finding himself shorter than Jay Kay. There was a soft smirk on his lips only she got to see, “You found your favorite treat. Are you here to share with me?”

Her own smile widened moreso. She bent down to look him in the eye. “Only if you promise to keep it a secret.”

Interested, he watched her settle down next to him, finally opening her treat. “There's a game people play with pockys, I wanted to try it with you. If you're interested, I mean.”

Humming softly, Weather took the opportunity to come closer, nose and warm breath hovering against Jay's cheek. “You've caught my attention.”

There was a little warmth in her face, and a devious look in her shiny blue eye. She took one cream coated biscuit, holding it close to her face like a wand; “It’s simple!: one person puts either end of the pocky in their mouth and they slowly start to eat it. The goal is to finish the thing without breaking it, if you break it, you lose. And if you get the last piece, you win!”

A single, perfect white eyebrow arched at the rules, and Weather couldn't help it as his smile stretched further. His interest was piqued, and he made sure she knew, whispering against her skin.

“Sounds fun, let's do it.”

Jay Kay was unnecessarily giggly as she placed the naked pocky end between her lips. She'd play nice and let Weather Report have the coated end. Those perfect lips wrapped around his end of the snack, and Jay Kay never thought she'd be jealous of a biscuit.

At a signal, they both began to crunch down on their treat. It was a lot harder to keep the stick from breaking than she gave it credit, so the blonde hyper focused on doing the opposite of that. She took gentle bites, the pieces of her pocky disappearing down her throat faster than they even appeared. The taste was just as nice as she remembered, and Jay was glad they still tasted just as good as she remembered, even when they were found at the bottom of a cafeteria fight in the Aquarium.

She found herself frozen at the soft huff of breath from Weather Report’s nose. Just as she was, he was concentrating on the task at hand. And God, he looked so cute; with his eyebrows pulled together in a furrow and his eyes nearly crossed. She couldn't stomach it.

His eyes caught hers and it was enough to startle the woman. She snapped, and so did the pocky, with the small piece still stuck between Weather Report's lips.

He was silent for a moment while he chewed, swallowing and before asking his silly question. “Does that mean I win?”

“Yes, you win. Congratulations.” Jay Kay huffed while he cleaned her lips with her jacket sleeve. “Let's do it again! One more time!”

She didn't understand why she was acting so flustered over a man. Something about that amnesiac had her acting like she was back in middle school. So the blonde shook their head, clearing it of anything too sweet before it rotted her teeth.

Weather didn't seem bothered with a second round, as a matter of fact he looked determined to win again. Hah! Fat chance!

Once again they started like before, Jay Kay getting the dipped part of the pocky this time, however. Slowly but surely, much like the noble garden snail, they inched their ways closer and closer to the middle of the pocky. This time Jay Kay was painfully aware of how close Weather Report was getting, but didn't falter. Not even when his lips felt like they were just about to brush against hers. She was about to steal away victory when Weather suddenly pushed forward. The pocky slipped into her open mouth, just when he stole the opportunity to crash his mouth with hers. Fingers tangled in sun colored locks, and hands flew up to grab at shoulders. Neither had the strength to pull away as they indulged in a secret kiss, and Weather let Jay Kay win the second round. He was hoping beyond hope that she'd let him play again with her. He could do this all day

[kyeskorner]

hmmmmmmmm

callie or acht or shiver x !human reader hcs?

i've been writing some stuff in that vein myself because i have a complete weak spot for crushing existentialism and worldly grief vs. indomitable MWAH and the idea of living on and i wonder how others see the vision....

like, everything i love could burn in holy fire tomorrow and i would still get up if any damn talking sea creature said i had to keep balling

oh anonymous... why ask for one character when you can GET ALL THREE!!! I have never done a human reader before in the splatoon universe but IMA GIVE IT A SHOT!!!!

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CALLIE, SHIVER, AND ACHT X HUMAN!READER

(sorry no gif for now!)

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CALLIE

(oh hey there's the gif!)

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Okay these are all basically gonna start the same

Oh and also they speak English too.

I feel like she would stumble upon some cryopods and you are stored in them

She would be like "Oooh what's this button do?"

She clicks it, and out falls you!!!

It takes you a bit to come to...

"H-huh...? Who are you...?"

"OMG!! A new friend!!! Hi, I'm Callie! And you are??"

"W-wait... what's going on...? What year is it?"

"Oh! It's, uh... 14024, why?"

"WHAT?!"

She is confused why you're so distraught.

"O-oh god... what about my family...? My friends? What's... are they-"

"Heyyyy, let's not think about that right now! Here, come with me!"

She is very good at distracting you from the Thoughts of Despair™.

She gets you home and welcomes you with open arms. Literally.... she gave you a hug if you accepted it

Immediately gets you a drink and something to eat. Being frozen for 12000 years must have you famished!

"If you need anything, I'll be in the other room!"

You adjust to your new life, and soon you guys get together!!! Yay!!!

One thing she absolutely loves to do btw

She loves to ruffle your hair

She never was able to do anything like that

"Haha! Your hair is all messy now! But you look really cute too :3"

This girl singlehandedly got you adjusted to the new world

And she even delayed inevitable feelings of demise???

She slays honestly

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SHIVER

(shiver is gonna use she/they!)

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"..."

"..."

"FRYE, BIG MAN, I THINK I FOUND OURSELVES TREASURE"

Wow, waking up and already being called treasure? Impressive

You place your hands on your head.

"This is all a dream, right??? Like- hah- I'm gonna wake up any moment now."

"This is a dream... for us! Come on guys, help them up!"

Shiver brought you home. They sat you down and clap their hands together.

"Tell me your story. I can tell you aren't an Inkling or Octoling- or anything I've seen before."

You tell her your story, and how you ended up in the cryopod. You let out a laugh... but she can tell it's not cause it's funny.

"...My, you poor thing. I can't even imagine what it's like to go through that."

"...They're all gone. I'm... never gonna see them again..."

Shiver reaches her hand forward and stops.

"Sorry. Is it... alright if I put my hand on your shoulder?"

"...Go ahead..."

They do that.

"Hey, look at me."

You look at her red eyes...

"We're gonna get through this. Me, Frye, and Big Man will help you. After all, that's what Deep Cut does. Help those in need."

"...T-thank you... I-I-"

You burst out into a sob. You pull Shiver into a hug, sobbing into them.

"A-ah! There- there... it's... we'll get through this!"

They are terrible at comfort.

Once again, you adjust to your new life.

Shiver laughed a bit at seeing your reaction to Master Mega.

If they see you getting nervous or near another crisis, they will hold your hand and squeeze it.

It always gets you out of that funk.

Sure, your first meeting was awkward, but you're so thankful to have her in your life.

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ACHT

(why is this gif so slow) (also acht will use they/them!!! im still deciding on my headcanon for them but for now, they and thems willdo)

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They... actually emphasize with you!

They know what it's like to spend a time locked away from society.

After all, they had no mind of their own for awhile...

Acht shares about their time in the Metro, and you share about your time before being frozen.

"Do you think there's any remnants of your time?"

"I doubt it... I think you'd really like the music from my time."

"Hah, I'd bet so."

Acht would definitely ask to sample your human voice. It's unlike anything they've ever heard before.

That's how you two spend most of your time, honestly.

Listening to music... it reminds you of the old times.

They notice you tearing up one time.

"You okay?"

"This just... reminds me of the old times... before everything."

"We can stop if you want-"

"N-no! It's fine... really... just. Feeling nostalgic is all!"

You let out an awkward chuckle. Acht pauses the music.

"Take a breather. Let's go get you some water."

They help you up, and bring you to get some water.

You drink it, and they look at you.

"Better?"

"A-a little..."

They smirk a tiny bit, before opening up their arms.

You stare at them, confused.

"Well... I just thought... hugs would help. It's something I learned up here-"

You quickly hug them back. They wrap their arms around you.

"Heh. You needed this."

"I really did... thank you..."

You feel safe in Acht's arms.

Maybe this new world... isn't so bad after all.

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TADAHHHH!!! I REALLY HOPE YOU LIKE THIS, SORRY IF IT'S KINDA DOO DOO THIS IS MY FIRST TIME WRITING SOMETHING LIKE THIS!!! BUT RAGHHHH THE INDOMITABLE HUMAN SPIRIT AND THEIR SQUID/OCTO PARTNER PREVAILS!!!!!! THANK YOU FOR REQUESTING :3c

[secretly-tword-obsessed]

omg okay so when i saw that you write for big mouth and human resources i about lost my shit. so im a huge jatthew fan and id really like a lee jay drabble where matthew gives jay cheer up tkls bcuz he's sad about his family OR lee pete the logic rock headcanons.

ofc you can chose not to but yk💓 ill write them if you wont 😩

Hey! Sorry I'm so late to this - if you like it I'll keep making these in quicker time.

Again, so sorry it took so long, I have periods where I do and don't have time for this witting because of school, but I'm free for the next few weeks (yay!)

Sooo I think I'll do Pete HC's, especially because he interacts with Caleb so much in this new season, meaning I can weave him in there somewhere.

Pete is made of rock, so him being ticklish is like, impossible

(bows, leaves)

Hah! Oh so you thought! (re-enters)

So even though he's so rough and strong we all know that he's a softie. We also know that he's muscly, and that muscles make you more ticklish.

Rochelle found out that he was ticklish actually before they were dating by seeing him get tickled by Emmy before hours. Ofc when Pete saw Rochelle he was visibly embarassed and was pathetically trying to sound like a strong guy and said that he was faking laughing for Emmy's satisfaction to shut her up.

"Come on, surely there is an ounce of logic in your love bug brain. You know that I couldn't possibly be ticklish, I'm a rock and i can't even feel temperature. What was I supposed to do when Emmy started annoying me?"

Rochelle smirked - "well, ok, if that's the case than I still don't think Emmy is satisfied, so maybe you should 'fake' some more"

So yeah whenever someone asks if Pete's ticklish or doubts it when he says he isn't he always brings up logic to conclude that he couldn't possibly be ticklish

This also happened with Connie once because yk she's so randomly curious about the weirdest shit so she walks up to him one day and goes - "so, you know how your made of rock right? Does that mean you can't be ticklish?" And his heart STOPPED for a moment.

Also it has happened with Caleb ofc. Once Pete and Maury were in a meeting to create a list of notes on what touches would be acceptable for a potential partner, and they both wondered weather tickling would be ok so they asked Caleb in person. He said that it would be fine but first asked Pete if he would be ok with it. Ofc Pete pulled off his whole "i'm a rock so your question makes no sense" thing and ofc Caleb didn't fall for it and told him that, very many times, he had observed Pete getting itchy, which means that he was just as likely to be ticklish and even more so because he was sensitive. Maury smirked at Pete and Pete felt like throwing Caleb out the window (but never ACTUALLY considered it because he never would - he's a nonviolent rock).

Oh wait I haven't gotten to him ACTUALLY being tickled yet much so he is sometimes tickled by Emmy when she is pressuring him to say something (Emmy can always tell when there is something up).

ALSO I think Caleb tickled him once but on accident. Like he was poking and prodding Pete because he likes the texture of rocks and Pete just clenched his teeth and took it. Until he couldn't take it anymore and started giggling, squirming out of Caleb's grip with a "stawwp ittt" (fic idea?!)

Now, for the most important thing, spots...

Belly - 8/10. Lots of giggles

Neck - Not much

Sides - Bro will SCREAM, especially on the sides of his belly. 10/10

Underarms - pretty bad, some light chuckling. 4/10

That's all I can think of rn, thankyou for reading! Until next time gigglers (:

[obey-me-male-and-gn-mcs]

Ahrjwkfjsjfbejfbr hi it me again. I was wonderin if maybe I could request somethin again? 👉👈 If not that's 100% okay!! If so, may I have the brothers' reaction to finding out male mc is in a secret relationship with Diavolo? Ily thank youu ^.^

Why Hello again >:D!!! Sorry this took me a while I just got back from my Florida trip so it did take me a while to finish this 👁👁💧Of course I can do that for ya! I love you too 😌✨

Male Reader

Mostly SFW just on Mammon’s there’s a bit of NSFW

Brother’s finding out Male MC is in a secret relationship with Diavolo

Lucifer

His first thought was.

“Well... this is interesting”

He found out by Diavolo himself.

Lucifer is his right hand man after all.

So of course Diavolo sat him down and told him about your secret relationship.

He was really really shocked because the both of you did so well at hiding it.

But nonetheless he was happy for the two of you.

If Diavolo chose to only tell him but keep the secret from everyone else he’ll make sure it said a secret.

Anyone had the slightest idea no you don’t baby because Lucifer’s putting a curse on you to forget.

Bonus!!! When you all do tell the entirety of Devildom and some people say it’s improper for the future king to marry another man...

Yeah they went missing 😳💧

But hey look on the bright side, cerberus is happy with his new play toys 😌

Mammon

Mammon found out in a very... interesting way...

He barged into you’re room because he kept hearing soft groans.

He expected to walk in on the Human hurt

Instead he walked in on... the nasty between you too...

Mammon passed out right then and there.

Que the screaming and panicking from you thinking he was dead.

But no he was passed out so nothing to worry about .

Once he finally got up and the both of you explained your secret relationship he was a bit jealous.

Mammon did like you after all so it took him a bit to comprehend everything but he eventually came around and was happy for you two.

He would also keep your secret and tell NO ONE.

No matter what he would not crack.

So yay Mammon isn’t telling no one and you can take your time getting ready to tell the others >:)

Leviathan

He found out because one day you were in his room playing a game and you got a text from Diavolo.

Before hand you had went to the bathroom and left your phone.

But you had Diavolo as some sappy couple name on your phone.

He was confused like really confused.

So when you came back he jsut asked straight up but red as a tomato.

“w-w-w-who’s t-t-that?” Pointing to your phone which still had the message.

You then explained to him that it was Diavolo and you had been secretly dating.

He was kinda bummed out and secretly saying in his head.

‘Oh course he wouldn’t want to be with an yucky otaku like me when he could be with a prince like Diavolo’

Since he is the Avatar Of Envy it took him a while to process and accept it but he eventually comes around don’t worry.

If anyone has the slightest idea of your relationship I am so sorry to tell you but...

He just stays in his room and begs that the person’s thoughts will go away.

He just knows he can’t cover for you two it’s to much pressure.

So he just holes away in his room hoping with everything that the person’s hunch will go away (was gonna say praying but 😀💧).

Satan

Pfft

PFFTTTTT

HAHAHAHA

Did you REALLY think that you can keep a relationship HIDDEN from the defective of the house?

Please.

By the time you were already gonna tell him he had it all figured out.

You know that chart with the red strings and pictures, writings and more in them?

This man for real pulled that out under his bed and proudly presented it to you when he told you.

“You’ve been in a secret relationship with Diavolo? Heh *pulls out chart* I’ve been knowing~”

It had pictures of you two on a date, pictures of you two hugging and even pictures of you two kissing!?!?!??

You called him a stalker and he denied it and just said he’s a “detective”.

As for keeping your relationship a secret he’s most likely the best one hiding it for you two.

He can smooth talk his way out of any situation so absolutely no one has a clue.

In all, 10/10 keeping it a secret till you two are ready.

Asmodeus

Also been knowing.

But not from stalking you two like a special angry demon no no no.

I like the headcanon that Asmo can feel the lust from someone.

So he put two and two together when Diavolo started coming over and felt strong lust from a demon and human coming from your room.

“You can hide your love from me but you lost certainly can’t hide your lust from me sweetheart~”

Once he finds out he is also saddened that he can’t be in a relationship with you hit that still doesn’t stop him from being flirty.

But you nor Diavolo are complaining because it actually helps the both of you keep your secret relationship.

So yay Asmo is helping without even know.

(Apologies for Asmo’s being so short I have a hard time writing for him 🙇)

Beelzebub

Hm? You’re in a secret relationship with Diavolo? Alright.”

That was his literally reaction.

You told him when you took him out to eat with of course Diavolo’s credit card.

Diavolo knew before hand so he just gave you it.

What can I say dating the prince of Devildom has its perks 🤭✨

aHEM ANYWAYS GETTING OFF TOPIC.

Beel was happy for the two of you.

He pushed his feelings aside and was genuinely happy for the two of you.

Now he realized he get free food because you’re dating the prince of Devildom.

“✨👄✨ amazing”

As for keeping your relationship a secret boom he’s already on it.

He waits till the two of you are ready to tell everyone.

10000/10 reaction and support from Beel 🥰❤️✨

Belphegor

“Hah? You’re dating him? Really? How dare you disturb my nap to tell me that 😒”

Yeah since Belpie isn’t to fond of Diavolo he isn’t really all to excited about it.

Not to mention you woke him up from his nap just to tell him.

But if he made you happy fine he’ll deal with it.

Just because you’re dating Diavolo doesn’t mean you get to skip out of cuddle hours 🙄.

Yeah he’ll let some things go like some of your attention time but cuddle hours are a no >:(.

Diavolo has to deal with it smh.

If anyone tries to find out oh boy!

That laziness will snap out of him so quick and he’ll torture and make them forget with a curse to ensure that NO ONE finds out.

Best part is you won’t even know because he’s stealthy.

Cow go stabby stabby if anyone dares to find out 🐄🔪

Masterlist rules

[gigglz]

Not ticklish.

Hellooo! Im finally writing again! This is only my 2nd fic ever so be nice!

Also I didnt use any “ ‘ “ in this fic.. cuz i wrote this at 2am and was too lazy for that LMAO

Warnings: This is a tickle fic! So if you dont like that stuff dont read! No tickling is not always sexual! Pure fluff here!

Tony Stark x Reader

Ft. Bucky Barnes

Reader identifies as a girl and uses she/her pronouns! ( I will be making fics with other pronouns too! )

Im dont really like writing about being restraint and tickled, so this will probs be one of the only fics with this sort of stuff! Enjoy!! :D

Prompt: Tony asked if you wanned make yourself a suit, you were new to the Avengers team so Tony was helping you make it. Then something unexpected happened.

Word count: 1,389

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You were finally finished your training with Bucky.

You huffed, “Ugh! Finally! Im so tired!” You sat down on the living room couch and chugged your water.

“Oh come on! It wasnt that bad, plus you will have to get used to it.” Bucky ruffled your hair and went to the kitchen.

Bucky saw you as his little sister, he treated you like he has known you all his life. You liked it tho, you liked that he didnt treat you differently.

Then Tony walked in.

“Hey, kid! Sinse Peter just made his suit, ya want to make one too?” Tony knew you were gonna say yes because you have been begging him for ages.

“YES!” You stood up, you werent tired anymore. You were REALLY excited.

“Woah! What now? Not tired anymore?” Bucky yelled from the kitchen and laughed.

You scoffed and looked at Tony.

“So... you wanna make it or not? This is your only chance, kid.” Tony started to walk away.

“Wait! Now?” You were excited and followed Tony, “Oh, Wait! I need to grab something from my room!”

“Okay, ill be waiting for you in the lab!” Tony called out to you as you ran to your room.

You grabbed your sketchbook and ran back down.

You entered the lab, and looked around. You had never been here before, because you werent allowed in here.

“Woah... ehem. I have a sketch of my suit!” You had been working on your suit for months and you were really excited to make it.

“Hah, you came ready! Unlike Peter.” Tony laughed and took a look at your sketched suit.

You stared at Tony while he was examaning your design. You were worried he wouldnt like it.

“Woah, kid! This is pretty cool, but I do have some suggestions.”

You scoffed at Tony, he always found something to change, you didnt mind tho. 

“See this?” You nodded “I think this would look cooler, and work better too.” You watched as Tony sketched on some details, and made some little changes to your suit.

After a few minutes the design was done, and you had to say it looked AWESOME.

“Mkay! Were done! Ready to actually make it?” Tony looked at you with a smile.

“Yay! Yes im ready!” You ran to the big printer thingy, you werent really sure what it was, but you knew you had to stand in it.

“Well it looks like you know what youre doing.” Tony turned and started to push some buttons.

The machine started up, it scared you a little.

“This is so cool!” You exclaimed as you stuck your hands out so the machine could scan everything.

The machine started webbing thin material over your legs, you realized you couldnt move them.

“Uhm.. Tony? I cant move my legs, is this normal?” You looked up at Tony, his back was turned to you.

“Mhm yeah, its so you dont move and mess something up.” He was still tinkering with something on his desk.

“oh okay!” You wondered how Peter got thru this cuz you know he is very energetic, Tony was probably right on installing this feature.

The machine was up to your hips, still webbing around.

“Okay, the first layer is almost done. Hang in there Y/N.” Tony said, turning to you.

The machine was working fast, and was already up to your chest.

“So.. why is it wrapping me in this weird material, why not do the pattern and stuff?” You asked a little confused.

Tony walked to you cuz the machine finally was up to your neck and stopped.

“Its doing this so it can map out everything, and the patterns dont look weird and messed up.” As he said that he pushed a button on the machine, and it started ‘blowing’ off the accses of the material.

The preassure of the air hitting you legs tingled.

You tried to move your leg a little, but of course you couldnt.

Tony looked at you, sensing something was happening “The machine will blow off any access of the material, nothing to worry about, kid.”

“Ye-eah, got it.” You stuttered a little.

The machine reached your hips, and that tickled... like.. a lot.

“Ahagh!” You squealed.

Tony looked at you and raised his eyebrow, “What was that? You ok?” You heard a little of worry in his tone.

You tried to stiffle your laughter, “Yehes, im fine” You looked down, you were blushing a little.

The machine now was at your sides.

You tried to quirm away. But you couldnt hold the giggles in.

“You sure youre okay, ki-”

“HAH! Nahaha-” You cut Tony off with your giggles.

He didnt seem to get it.

“You.. whats so funny? Is it me?” He looked at you really confused.

“Nohoho! AGH! Ihits not youhuhu!” You were close to breaking out in full on laughter.

The machine passed your stomach and was at your ribs.

“AHAGH! Wahahait! NooOOoo! heHeheha!” You were now laughing.

Tony stared at you and put the peaces together.

“Kid, really? Youre ticklish?” Tony laughed at how you were reacting.

You shook your head, still laughing.

“So... youre not ticklish?” He smirked. “You sure? Cuz it doesnt seem like it to me.” Tony scoffed.

“Ihihim nohot!” You tried to protest.

“then why are you laughing, hm?” Tony tilted his head sassily.

The machine passed your ribs and arms, it was at your neck and then stopped so you werent laughing as hard anymore, but you were still recovering from the little tickle attack from the machine.

“Ihim not.. *huff*.. see? Im not even laughing!” You looked up at Tony, just to see him smirking and standing sassily.

“Yeah right. I think the suit can wait a little.. dont you agree?” Tony’s smirk became bigger.

You didnt know what he meant. “What? but wh- AH!” You felt a poke at your stomach, and looked at Tony again.

“Hm.. not ticklish, huh? Then you wouldnt really mind, im just checking if its ready for the pattern to be made.” Tony poked you again.

“But you said the suit could wAIT- TONY!”

Tony looked at you, acting confused.

“Whats wrong? Did I hurt you? Im sorry, now I have to check for wounds!” Tony started squeezing and prodding at your sides and stomach.

“GAH! TONY! Nahaha! Stahap!” You couldnt move at all, the only thing you could move was your head.

“Uh oh.. did you lie to me?! *gasp* You lied! You are ticklish!” He fake gasped and started squeezing your sides with both hands.

“AHAGH! TONY! Nohohooo! Okahay! I am tihicklish! Now stohohop!” You blushed when you said the t word.

“I KNEW IT! How dare you, Y/N! No one lies to me and gets away with it!” He started spidering all over your belly and sides.

You let out a loud belly laughter, Tony never really has heard you laugh like this before.

“Woahhh! Now what is this?” Tony started moving his fingers faster.

“AHA! NOHOHO! NOOOO!” You threw your head back, you couldnt take much more.

Tony felt that you were close to your limit, and wanned to do one last thing.

He leaned forward, and blew a big rasberry one the side of your neck.

Your laugh went silent, and Tony stopped.

You were still giggling from the ghost tingles that were still on your torso and neck.

“Hah! It sounds like someone is getting murdered. What happened? Tony, please tell me you didnt kill her.” Bucky walked in the lab.

“What, no! Shes fine.. see?” Tony pointed to you and held in a laugh when he saw your state.

“Ehehh.. ehh... *huff*.. im fi-fine!”

“What did you do?” Bucky laughed.

“Oh, just found out shes ti-”

“NOTHING- He did noting... im good.” You cut Tony off, obviously not wanting Bucky to know... cuz he would literally kill you.

Tony laughed.

“Okay, okay. Buck, get out.” Tony pointed to the door. “We have important business to attend to.”

“Fineee- just- dont kill her.. please?” Bucky said as he started to walk to the door.

You looked at Tony with puppy dog eyes, he looked at you too.

“I- yeah, of course, *ehem*, okay! Lets finish this suit!” Tony turned to his desk and pushed some buttons.

After like 40 minutes your suit was done, you were so excited. It looked amazing! You thanked Tony and ran to show everyone else.

Tony laughed at your excitment and watched you run out of the lab.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Thank you for reading! Sorry if it was kinda short, im still working on my fics and figuring out how exactly to write them. <33

[osakaso5]

Everyday Splendor in Olympus Town: Season 2

Episode 2: Dionysus

Episode Index

Zeus: Ah, your wines truly are special, Dionysus.

Dionysus: I know, right? It's because I gave the grapes extra pets and played them tooons of songs this year.

Zeus: Pets..?

Zeus: I'm not sure what that means, but I do appreciate all the hard work you do for me.

Dionysus: Yay, a compliment. I'm soooo happy.

Hercules: I've finally found you, Dionysus! You're under arrest on suspicion of lying!

Dionysus: Hmm, you're arresting me again? I feel like that's all you ever do, Herakles.

Hercules: It's H-E-R-C-U-L-E-S! Get it right, or I'll add constantly mispronouncing my name to your charges!

Zeus: Do you have to make so much noise?

Zeus: Either be quiet, or begone.

Hercules: ...I didn't realize you were also here, Master Zeus...

Hercules: Nevertheless, this man is a suspect, and I must take him into custody!

Zeus: Can't you see I'm giving my patronage to his oden stand? I can't have him disappear on me.

Zeus: Do not bother us any longer.

Hercules: ...Very well... I'll hold off on the arrest until you're finished dining.

Hercules: And you, don't even think of running away!

Dionysus: Wow, thanks so much for your patience. In the meantime, you should have a drink too, Hecurlies.  

Hercules: ...I'll have sake.

Dionysus: Red wine, coming right up.

Hercules: Huh? No, I said I want sake.

Dionysus: Here's the red wine you asked for.

Zeus: He doesn't serve anything else, you know.

Hercules: You run an oden stand, but don't serve sake..!? Why!?

Hercules: Hm? Wait a minute... Your oden doesn't even have any ingredients other than potato in it!

Hercules: I'd hardly call this oden... So that's another thing I'm adding to your charges.

Dionysus: What charges are those, anyhow? I haven't been lying to people.

Dionysus: All the potatoes are due to your dad here. I'm sure Master Zauss can tell you all about it.

Zeus: Do you take issue with potatoes, Hercules?

Zeus: Or are you trying to inflate your arrest numbers so they'll be as high as those of Odysseus?

Hercules: O-of course not...

Hercules: I'm not worried about Odysseus. Not one bit...

Dionysus: Ahaha, yeah, right. Since you're so cute, I'll let you have  the wine for free, Hercoolio. 

Hercules: I don't need your damn wine!

Hercules: And besides, the charges are not false.

Hercules: They were brought on by your nonsensical stories about there being gold buried somewhere in Olympus Town.

Zeus: Gold, you say..?

Hercules: My investigation points to Dionysus as the source of the rumors.

Dionysus: Oh, the gold thing. I heard about that from one of my customers.

Dionysus: Apparently, someone very important from Olympus Town buried gold to gift to their children.

Dionysus: And it wasn't just gold, I was told. There were also books with crucial knowledge written on them, such as how to pick up girls, or the secret to becoming the strongest warrior the world has ever seen.

Zeus: Knowledge on how to pick up girls, you say..!?

Hercules: The secret to becoming the strongest warrior..!?

Zeus: If I got my hands on those books, women the world over would adore me...

Hercules: If I became the strongest warrior ever, then I could finally defeat  Odysseus and become number one...

Zeus: So, where exactly is this treasure?

Hercules: Tell us right now.

Dionysus: I didn't think you two would be so interested.

Hercules: It must be investigated, that's all. I still think you're lying.

Dionysus: Hmm, but I don't know where it's located...

Dionysus: I wanted to dig it up and give it aaaall to Hestia, but I've been having trouble finding it...

Dionysus: I digged and I digged, but all I found was garbage. Where could the gold be, I wonder?

Zeus: Were there any books among the trash you found?

Dionysus: Hmm, were there?

Zeus: Any information you have will help.

Dionysus: Oh, actually!

Hercules & Zeus: What..!?

Dionysus: There was a note with Ateeny's name on it. It was inside a chest, so I mistook it for treasure.

Hercules & Zeus: That can't be it...

Hercules: ...Wait. I was wondering who's been digging holes in the ground, but it was clearly you! Do you have any idea how long it took me to fill those up!?

Dionysus: Oh, you filled them up for me? That was so nice of you. Have some more free wine, as thanks.

Zeus: I doubt going around digging tiny little holes in the ground was particularly helpful in finding the treasure.

Zeus: We should evacuate the city, and turn the entire soil inside out.

Dionysus: What!? You can do that!? Wow, Master Zauss, you're amazing!

Hercules: Evacuate the city? Hmph, it sounds like you need to be arrested for making terrorist threats. That's another one of my record.

Hercules: And since I'm apprehending such a high-profile suspect, I'll be the talk of the town.

Dionysus: You'll put Master Zauss in jail? Even though he's your old man?

Hercules: Our personal relationship has nothing to do with his wrongdoings. 

Hercules: I'd worry about myself, if I were you. Your arrest has only been postponed, not cancelled.

Dionysus: You're such a scary policeman. If I go to jail, I can't see  Hestia anymore. Or drink red wine.

Dionysus: Oh, I know! Since you're arresting us both, how about you put us in the same cell?  

Dionysus: That way, Hestia can come  bring us treats, and we can probably  keep drinking wine all day long! 

Hercules: Your laziness astounds me...

Zeus: Hmph, a mere officer of the law will not capture the almighty Zeus.

Dionysus: Whoooa! You're sooo cool! A toast to Master Zauss!

Zeus: Hah hah hah. But of course.

Hercules: ...Ugh... It's pointless to reason with these drunkards...

Dionysus: Heeey! Harculius, stop standing around and drink with us.

Hercules: It's Hercules! ...Though I suppose correcting you won't make a difference...

Zeus: Who cares about names? Have a sip of the greatest wine you'll ever have the privilege to enjoy.

Hercules: Fine... I'll have one glass with you, then.

Hercules: ........!? This actually tastes quite good...

Dionysus: Doesn't it!? I think I've managed to make something special this year.

Hercules: You're under arrest for making wine that tastes too good.

Dionysus: Hehehe, you sure do love arresting people! I must say, I like the sound of those charges.

Dionysus: Drink up, there's plenty more great wine for both of you to enjoy. 

[babbysquid]

Not A Whiskey Drinker Pt. 2

Author’s Note: Oh my goodness thank you all for the positive feedback on NAWD! I’m really enjoying writing this and living out my own fantasy. The DRAMA begins in the part after this so prepare yourself for that!

Warnings: mild cursing

------------

Sunday had passed by quickly and it was now Monday at 8am. Your interview was at 9. You studied your reflection in the mirror. You were wearing the outfit that Parker had helped you pick out but had the shirt buttoned all the way up. Grabbing your bag you and throwing on your shoes you looked at yourself one more time. Chewing the inside of your cheek you took a deep breath.

“Fuck it.” you whispered to and you unbuttoned the top two buttons of your shirt, just as Parker had done previously.

You stood outside a tall office building and looked up. It looked modern and new, but not imposing. Swallowing hard you pushed your shoulders back, raised your head up, and strutted through the front door. Fake it til you make it as they say.

“Hi I’m Y/N Y/L/N.” you said to the receptionist at the front desk. “I have an interview with Mr. Daniels.”

“Ah yes Mr. Daniels has been expecting you. Give me one second and I’ll take you to his office.” said the receptionist.

“Ah it’s okay Sara, I got it.” said a voice from behind you.

Turning around you saw a gorgeous woman. She wore a white button down and black slacks. Her short haircut was modern and cute. It suited her face really well. Thick glasses sat on the edge of her nose. She gave you a kind smile. Looking at her outfit and her appearance in general you suddenly felt self conscious. Maybe you should’ve stuck with the fully buttoned up shirt.

“I’m Ginger.” she said, extending her hand.

You took her hand in yours as you introduced yourself and the two of you walked to the elevators.

“So you have an interview with Jack?”

You nodded.

She laughed a little and it almost seemed like she was taking pity on you.

“He’s a good guy, but he’s definitely a character. He means well though.”

You smiled back. New York City was definitely filled with interesting and strange people. Your mind quickly thought back to the cowboy you met on Friday.

The elevator dinged and stirred you from your thoughts. Ginger guided you to a pair of mahogany doors.

“Well. This is where I leave you. Good luck Y/N.”

“Thank you.”

Taking a deep breath you knocked on the door and waited. A second later you heard some footsteps and you mentally prepared yourself for whoever was inside. The door swung open and your jaw dropped. You couldn’t help it.

Before you stood the same cowboy that had prevented your fall. Quickly you snapped your jaw shut. He was just as handsome as you remember, if not more handsome. He was still wearing his black stetson. Instead of the long camel coat he wore when he was in the park he was wearing a blazer with matching slacks. The blazer had a classic cowboy look but was still somehow modern. You flicked your eyes down to confirm your guess, he was wearing cowboy boots. He was wearing a pair of simple wire glasses and they looked good on him.

“Well isn’t this a coincidence?” said the man, “Come in, please.”

He stepped aside allowing you to enter the office.

For as modern as the building appeared, Mr. Daniels’ office felt lived in and warm. It was covered in mahogany and leather. An old globe sat on a shelf and other bits and bobs decorated the office, including what appeared to be a cow skull. You didn’t realize you were staring until Mr. Daniels’ honeyed voice made you blink.

“It’s real if that’s what you’re thinking.” he said.

You turned and realized he was much closer than you thought, practically close enough to touch you. You swallowed hard. He smelled good.

“Well let’s get started, shall we?” he said, stepping back and motioning to a chair that sat in front of his desk.

Wordlessly you moved to the chair and sat down. The whole act of confidence you had suddenly vanished. Mr. Daniels was slightly intimidating and holy hell was he attractive.

“Now Y/N — you don’t mind if I call you that?” Mr. Daniels asked.

“Y/N is fine yes.” you said, slightly unsure about the familiarity. Your previous job you were never addressed by your first name, it was always Ms. Y/L/N.

“Would you like something to drink?” he asked, swiveling in his chair to grab a bottle of whiskey and two glasses from behind him.

You smiled, appreciating the offer but politely declined.

“I’m actually not a whiskey drinker.” you said. Mr. Daniels laughed loudly as if he knew something you didn’t.

“I know it’s odd that I’m here interviewing for a whiskey company Mr. Daniels—

“Please, call me Jack.” he interrupted.

“…Jack,” you said slowly “but I promise I’ll be dedicated even if it’s not my drink of choice.”

Jack smiled and poured himself a glass of the amber liquid. Leaning back in his chair he studied you. Feeling his gaze on you, you gave him a small smile, trying to convince him that you really would work hard.

“Well Y/N,” he said after a second, “you got the job!”

Your brows furrowed. There was absolutely no way he was serious. He only asked if you wanted a drink, the company’s drink no less, and you said no. No interview questions, no asking for documents or recommendations. Nothing.

“I know you might be surprised but here at Statesmen we like to do things a little differently. And don’t worry about not liking whiskey. Who knows though, you may warm up to it.” he said, giving you a wink.

“This certainly was the easiest interview I’ve ever done.” you whispered under your breath. But according to the booming laugh that came out of the man sitting in front of you, your whisper wasn’t quiet enough.

“I assure you Y/N that you’ve already gone through an extensive interview process. The company has contacted past employers of yours and done copious amount of research and background checks into your resume. It may have been easy on your end, but not on ours.”

‘Certainly the weirdest interview I’ve ever done too.’ you thought.

“Well!” said Jack, clasping his hands together and standing up from his chair. “You start tomorrow. Let me give you a quick tour so you can settle in easy tomorrow.” In a flash he was around the desk and holding his hand out to you, a million dollar smile on his face.

Letting out a short breath you pushed away your anxiety and trepidation. If this was gonna be your new job you may as well start acting like your normal self. You grabbed his hand with assurance and stood up from your seat.

Neither one of you moved.

Standing there your eyes were glued to the sight of your hand being dwarfed by his. Slowly your eyes moved up to meet Jack’s. They were the most gorgeous shade of brown. Dark but still with a warmth and spark that drew you in. The glasses he wore framed them perfectly. Subconsciously you lightly bit your bottom lip. You blinked and the trance was broken. Slowly you removed your hand from his, but your palm was still tingling from the skin to skin contact.

“Thank you by the way.” you said breaking the silence.

Jack gave you that smile again and it felt like your internal organs had been turned to soup.

“Don’t worry about it darlin’. I’m quick on my feet and happened to see a beautiful young woman in need so I helped.”

You almost choked at the words he spoke.

“Let me show you to your space.” said Jack, his hand moving to lightly sit on the middle of your back.

In any other professional circumstance if someone did this to you you’d immediately call HR. In this instance however Jack’s gesture felt comforting and gentlemanly, not creepy and an intrusion of personal space. To summarize, you enjoyed his touch.

The two of you strode out the doors and walked a short distance down the hall to a door. Leading you inside Jack explained how this would be your personal office. You had never had a private space just for yourself in your workplace. You laughed softly.

“Something funny?” said Jack, looking down at you, hand still on your back.

“Never had my own space before. This place is almost bigger than my apartment.” You looked up at him with shining eyes. Jack swallowed thickly. Your big eyes were something else and certainly affecting him.

“Hah. Well I just hope you don’t move in here! Gotta have a separation between work and play.” said Jack, winking at you.

You could feel your face heating up at the comment as Jack led you out of the room and your heart was beating faster than it should’ve. Unbeknownst to you, so was Jack’s. He wasn’t expecting his new PA to be the gorgeous girl from the park. Admittedly he had thought about you a couple times since, beating himself up for not inviting you to coffee or something.

Outside of your new office stood Ginger.

“Ah sweet Ginger!” said Jack, removing his hand from your back. You silently mourned the loss of contact.

“This is my new peach of an assistant Y/N.”

“I know Jack.” said Ginger, rolling her eyes. “How do you think she found your office?”

“Always one step ahead Miss Ginger.” said Jack, flashing his smile again.

“Come with me Y/N and we’ll get you put in the system.”

“Pleasure meeting you darlin’ and I cannot wait til tomorrow.” said Jack, winking one last time before turning on his heel and sauntering back into his office.

“Is he always like that?”

“He’s always been a ladies man. You may be his assistant but make sure he knows who’s in charge. Keep him on a short leash.”

------------

“So how was it?” Parker asked, taking a bite out of her pizza. She had come over to eat dinner with you and get all the juicy details about the job interview.

“Weird. I mean I got the job, but it was still weird.”

“First off yay! Secondly, what do you mean weird?”

“Well the building was way more high tech than I expected but the thing that was the weirdest was the interview itself. The only thing he asked me was if I wanted a glass of whiskey.”

“To which you said no.”

“Yeah…” you trailed off.

“I know that look Y/N. What’s on your mind?”

“Jack Daniels is the cowboy from the park.”

Thankfully Parker had swallowed her bite of pizza before hearing this, otherwise there’d be a chewed up wad of cheese on your floor.

“WHAT?”

“He was acting kind of flirty too.”

“So you did unbutton the shirt!” Parker said, a look of pride on her face.

“Parker that’s not the point. Afterwards when I was talking to the head of networking and media she explained that Jack is like this with every woman. The hat I need to show him who’s in charge, even if he is my boss.”

“That’s hot.” said Parker taking another bite.

“Shut up he’s my boss.” you said, pushing her shoulder. “I get what she’s saying though. I’ve dealt with guys like that before. Admittedly they were in their 20s and went to the same college as me and weren’t actually adults who I worked with.”

“How old does this guy look anyways?” Clearly Parker had a different agenda than you.

“Parker…” you gave her a glare.

“Okay okay message received.” she put up her hands in mock defense.

You looked down at your pizza slice and picked at the bit of cheese that had slid off of it.

“So how’re you gonna fend him off while still creating a good relationship?”

“Guess I gotta use that stubbornness you were talking about earlier.” you said giving her a small grin.

taglist: @absurdthirst @space-daddy-owns-me @agentwhiskeypussyindulgence

[travellingarmy]

║Venti║Tag! You're It

Requested from Wattpad.

Gender-neutral.

Fluff.

Word count: 1.7k

---

You sat on the cool, green grass, watching blankly at the birds that flocks by every now and then before sighing, leaning back against the big ol' tree that was about Mondstadt's symbol at this point. It was an awfully slow day with not much excitement going since the traveller from who knows where fixed the whole Stormterror chaos. But honestly, you were quite enjoying the peace that has been restored in the City of Freedom that allowed you to slack off, closing your eyes and heaving a soft sigh.

Unknowingly, a cheeky bard crept up to your person, silent as a mouse. You wouldn't know how he would do it when the squirrels' feet are pitter-pattering the grass beside you and up to the tree.

With a hand reaching to your shoulders, too cold for a day such as this and too pale for a normal human being, your insides leapt out of you and made you stupefied for a brief moment. "Ehe, I didn't know you get scares so easily, (Y/N)~" You turned your head, eyes wide from the fright and a mix of disbelief at the number one bard of Mondstadt. "I was going to spook you with a 'boo' but it seems that you are quite sensitive." He giggles and you look down to his feet and see that he was using his Anemo to move closer to you undetected.

"Don't do that ever again! I thought you were a hilichurl," you breathed, calming your racing heart. He sits beside you, crossing his legs. "Sorry, sorry, I promise I will not do it.. For a while," he adds and you glared at the male. His hands shot up in defence, giving you a close-eyed, mischievous smile. "Anyway, what are you up to?" he asks, moving onto another topic.

"What does it look like?" you ask with a bored expression. His eyes look to the side at the vast green around. "Uh, playing hide and seek?" he purposely plays the dumb card. You were not the least bit amused. "Do you see anyone else around?" you questioned. "I was just resting. There's really not much to do other than looking at the animals at play." You closed your eyes and leaned unguardedly against the tree. You were sure that no one else will pop on by and if there was, you were sure that Venti would be the first to spot. He had a faster reaction time than yours after all.

Venti starts to hum a tune that was most likely made up on the spot since he didn't bring his lyre. It was good just like the rest of his songs and always had that drowsy effect on you. It helped since you just wanted to sleep if there was nothing else to do.

When Venti notices you were about to drift off, he completely stops and turns to you with a cheeky grin and tapping your shoulders repeatedly. "Hey, hey, (Y/N), you want to play hide and seek tag?" he asks. You were shaken up from what could have been your sleep and stare at him with a raised brow while looking annoyed. "Seriously, Venti? Can't we play once I've slept?" "Nope! You will just sleep until the sun has set, leaving me bored."

"You can always sleep during the night so get up and let's play!" He tugs on your sleeves. You groaned. "Venti, take a look around you-- there is literally no place to hide except those hilichurl camps." "So we'll use them as hiding locations too!" He grins.

You stared at him in disbelief, but upon seeing his bright smile, you could do nothing except sigh and accept. "Alright." "Yay! Okay, okay, I want to hide first!" he exclaims, getting up. "You better not peak~" You roll your eyes but did as told, covering your eyes and hearing him flee. You counted up to thirty-- enough time for an Anemo vision wielder such as himself to find a decent hiding spot.

"Alright, ready or not, here I come," you say loud enough and hope it reaches the male. You started looking around the tree but later started looking elsewhere when he wasn't hiding there. It was a good thing that the hilichurls from the camps were dealt with so you and Venti could play without getting into harm's way.

When you went to one of them, your eyes and ears quickly moved their attention to a green hat that rested behind a rock, making sounds of laughter. Well, it wasn't the hat that was laughing but rather, the person wearing the hat. You tried desperately hard not to break into a peal of laughter as you watch him crouch behind the rock.

Slowly, you crept up to his hiding spot, the soft rustling of grass under your feet barely audible, the sound of animals helping it fade from the male's ears. "Boo!" You put a hand on his shoulders, looking down at the bard. "Gah!" He turns his head to look over his shoulder. He felt his own heart race, not knowing you were approaching. "You scared me!" "You deserve it for scaring me earlier." You crossed your arms, grinning at your victorious approach.

"You're a terrible hider, Venti. You forgot to take your hat off," you said, pointing to your own head to point his own. "Ah, I totally forgot." He laughs, taking his hat off and looking at it with a smile. "It also didn't help that you were giggling." He sticks his tongue out and scratches the back of his head. "Ehe."

"Anyway, I guess it's my turn now?" you say, your words sounding more like a question than a statement. He nods his head. "Mm. You better not give away your location~" he says, turning around and putting his hands on his eyes; counting down. You quickly made a dash away from him, heading towards the big tree. You looked around for a good hiding spot, not wanting it to be obvious such as a hilichurl camp; that would be the first place he would definitely look into.

A sudden idea had struck you and you stared at the tree, eyeing its sturdy branches. "This place would be a good spot." With that, you climb the tree, aiming to go for the highest branch. Upon the highest branch, you could peek through the leaves at the sun and at your surroundings below. Surely, this was the best spot to look out for Venti.

You spot him leave the camp that he hid, now on a mission to find and touch you. You concealed a laugh, putting your hand on your mouth although it shouldn't matter since you doubt he could hear you from where you were.

Full of confidence, you propped yourself to lean against the tree, legs dangling off on each side of the branch. This would take a while, you thought to yourself and close your eyes, full of confidence. Closing your eyes was the biggest mistake because the next time you opened them, the sky was a mix of red and orange. "Hah? Did I fall asleep?" you half-asked yourself, moving your legs so that they were both dangling off on the same side as you rub the heavy feeling from your eyes.

You were still at the same spot but Venti was nowhere to be seen. You looked around at the nearby camps but to only see that there wasn't even the slightest movement to be seen. Were you left alone? Did he get bored and leave you there? No, that does not sound like Venti at all.. Well, maybe-- if he was playing a prank.

Suddenly, sounds of rustling leaves from above you were heard and then, "Yes, you did." Venti pops his head close to yours, upsidedown as he grins at you. "Ah!" Startled at the sudden closeness and scare, you fell backwards-- falling off of the branch.

"(Y/N)!" Venti extends a hand and in doing so, you stopped falling midway to the ground. He used his Anemo and slowly guided you back up to where you originally sat. You stare off with widened eyes, too slow to comprehend what just had happened. "H, hey, are you okay?" Venti asks, putting a hand on your shoulder.

Apparently, that was all it took to shake you to function as before. You lightly hit his chest. "Do you plan on killing me with a heart attack?" you questioned, eyes not reflecting amusement. He awkwardly chuckles. "Sorry, I didn't think I'd scare you."

You sighed. Seeing his face, you couldn't stay mad at him for too long. "I thought you left," you confessed, changing topics. "Eh? And never get the chance to see your adorable face sleeping? No way!" He flies to sit beside you on the branch, completely forgetting what he just did. "You watched me sleep for how long?" you questioned, raising a brow. "The moment I found you! It didn't take long since you fell off the branch when you were sleeping," he says. "It was a good thing that I saw and caught you in time."

"I fell off?" you repeat to which he nods. "That's when I found out that you were sleeping." You sigh. "Thank you," you said, making the male all smiles at the words of gratitude. "Hehe, anything to see you sleep!" He smiles, closing his eyes as he does so.

"Anyway, I'm getting hungry so I'll go home," you said. "What do you want to eat?" "I can join you?" he asks, eyes reflecting the sky when it turns dark-- full of stars. "Well, it's the least I could do for being saved twice from my death," you point out in a light tone. "Yay!" he cheers and guided you and himself down the tree. "I could really go for some dandelion--" "No." That one word made him pout, staring at you with puppy-like eyes. "You will have homecooked food. Not wine," you said. He sighs defeatedly. "Alright.."

---

[funkymbtifiction]

9-Merging Thank you!

Yay, I’m loving these 9-merging asks and replies (thank you so much for putting so much effort into your answers)!

I’ll add another thing that I imagine annoys other 9s -  “unnecessary conflict” - when characters constantly argue with each other without having a good reason and without moving the story forward. Easily avoidable conflict, especially when it is caused by people refusing/failing to communicate, frustrates me to no end (it’s also lazy writing!).

Mod: Yeah, one of my 9 friends refused to continue watching the To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before franchise because in her words, the last movie was “stupid… because the entire plot revolved around Lara Jean’s 9ish refusal to be honest with her boyfriend about not going to college he thought she was going to… so she was lying and avoiding and it was going to be a Stupid Argument that could have been Avoided.” XD

On the opposite side - do you or any other 9s/9-fixed types deal with their tendency to emotional numbness (ugh, hate it) by “emotion chasing” and trying to find scenes/songs/whatever that really hit them? When I find these things I watch/listen many times to try to re-experience the feelings. Sometimes it’s just one tiny part out of a whole. For example, I didn’t really love the new “Emma,” but there’s a very brief scene of some people walking over a bridge while a folk song plays and I stopped the movie and re-watched those few minutes so many times just because the earthiness/cyclical lyrics of the song and the simple village scene felt like a microsphere of daily life, beauty amidst mundanity, etc. I LOVED that, and it made the movie for me (although that might sound a bit silly!).

Mod: That could be? Anyone can reblog / repost this and answer, as 9s. I love intense emotions in movies and things because I so rarely have truly intense feelings all on my own, separate from entertainment or being ‘responsive.’ The most felt emotion I have other than apprehension is anger. :P But over time, re-watching things, sometimes my emotional connection fades and then I am sad, because it will never be as visceral or fresh as the first encounter again.

It’s interesting that you speculate that animated movies and cartoons might be less emotionally intense. Personally I’ve found some of them (Pixar, I am looking at you) almost unbearably emotional. Sometimes I wonder if it’s actually healthy to expose children to such powerful feelings. I suppose the idea is that they can process them through the story, but I know that there are moments from those movies that I experienced as a child and still haven’t forgotten. Sure, the ending is ultimately happy but the heartbreak happened and can’t be erased. Or maybe I was just too sensitive as a kid? As always, thank you for listening!

Mod: Hah! True! Pixar is full of genius-bastard NF types who always, ALWAYS leave me in tears, sometimes within the first ten minutes – Up, I am looking at you. Also, the end of Woody’s story hit me hard in the stupid feels. As for exposing kids too young to intense emotions, you can thank Walt Disney for that. For a kid as sensitive as me, seeing Dumbo’s mother locked up, Bambi’s mother shot, and the Fox and the Hound turned into enemies, not to mention that god-awful movie Old Yeller, were traumatic. I STILL won’t watch them. :P

[xeo-kunsatan]

MonsterOlympics One Shot +13 (Part 2)

This One shot is divided in parts because is long as hell XD, as well this contains many racy jokes, black humor and swearing, if youre sensitive with this humor i recommend you to not read this shit, as well this One shot is just for fun. (Sorry this time i have no illustrations, im Lazy, use your imagination XD)

Nobody have expected it, Farley and Toralei run quickly to hug eachother, they

were really happy to see eachother again.

The Students from Monster High were surprised because their most problematic and devilish Classmate was acting completely lovely with surprisely a Dog, something unusual in her especially for her pals Purrsephone and Meowlody who didn't understand their friend's behavior.

Cleo The Nile

Daughter of the Momy

Age: 5843 (or more)

Gender: Female

Species: Momy

Cleo: I cant Believe what my Beautiful eyes are watching...

Pinky: Me too Sis... Me too..

Farid: here we go again...

Claw: Mew?

P&M: Meww~

The Twin Cats went close to Them catching their attention.

Purrsephone and Meowlody

Daughters of Werecats.

Age: 16

Gender: Females

Species: Werecats

Purrsephone: You most be her Frrriend's brotherrrs~?

Farren: didn't you know that she was a friend of a Dog?

Meowlody: she told us something similarrr before, but we thought it was a joke knowing her.

Farid: well for more surprising it seems, it's true.

Purrsephone: do you know since when they meet eachother?

Farren: since we used to be pups living in the streets, one day we found her escaping from a store-man, prepare yourself because this part will make this part long.

Flashback.

The street of Monsteropolis was chill, a group of 3 Poodle puppies where looking for something to eat.

Farren: Agh I'm Hungry, and you?

Farid: *sob* i think i have a hole inside my stomach...

Farley: Calm down brothers, maybe we can go to Madame Ghoulasha's shop to ask for food. you know the trick, We Knock the door, we will use the puppy eyes effect against her and she will give us food.

Farren: i still don't understand why that trick works that well.

Farid: isn't obvious? We are pretty adorable but More me~.

Farren: *chuckles* aren't supposed to have a "hole inside your stomach?".

Farid: Hey! I'm Hungry but I'm still fabulous.

Farley: Guys look!

Suddenly the puppers found a shop man ogre chasing a kitten with a bottle.

Mr Ogre: Come back here you stupid mutt!!

Toralei: as you wish!

Mr Ogre followed the kitten to a dark alley

Farley: we can't leave them like that

Farren: Are you Serious!? It's a Cat!!

Farid: Eww yeah, what if they has fleas?

Farley: We have fleas too..*shows them a flea walking through his paw furr* and she needs our help, remember Stray animals always can help other stray animals.

Farren: but what if they doesn't thanks us?

Farley: We can throw them to the sewers

:3.

Farren: okay let's go.

The 3 puppies followed the Ogre to the Alley.

Mr Ogre: *manages to catch her*

Gotcha!

Toralei: No!!

Mr Ogre: Hah did you thought that you would escape from me?.

Toralei: Hssss!!! Let me go you bastard!!

Mr Ogre:*takes a razor* or what?

Toralei:..*gulp*...

Mr Ogre: heh your journey ends here kitty- agh!?

The Ogre was about to end with the kitten life but he suddenly was stopped by the tackle of the triplet Poodles, making him faint and drop the kitten.

Toralei: Mew!!

Farley:*catches her* Gotcha! Are you okay?

Toralei: T-thanks, *sniffs him* wait.. are you a Dog!? *Jumps off*

Farid: "your welcome" hmp!

Farley: Yes we are dogs, but i didn't wanted to leave you alone and less with that man about to make Cat-Hash with you.

Toralei: Well.. i usually can escape by myself but.. still, thank you.

Farley: at your service miss.. uhh

Toralei: Toralei Stripe, and you arrre?

Farley: My name is Farley, and this are my brothers, The sour one is Farren.

Farren: Hey!

Farley: and the Narcissist pup who is looking his reflection with the Ogre's razor is Farid.

Farid: who is a pretty puppy? I am! ÙwÚ.

Farley: and i am Farley, together we are the Fluffy Gang.

Toralei: Wow you are all a team, nice to meet ya, I wish I could have my own mates, my older siblings were all adopted except me...

Farley: don't worry, you can come with us and be part of the Gang!

Toralei: Yay! :D

Farid/Farren: What!? D:<

Farley: you can come with us the Time you want until you found out your own mates.

Toralei: Oki Doki! :D

Farren: Farley what the fluff!?

Farid: Whyyyy?~...

Farley: Aww c'mon guys it would be fun.

Farren: i don't think she would like to come with us.."we have fleas"

Toralei: I have Fleas too :D.

Farren: Ok Fair enough.

Farley: Well lets go >:3!

Suddenly the Ogre started to wake up

Mr Ogre: You Little-..

The Cubs: No D:<! *pulls out his cords*

Mr Ogre: What the-!!!... AAAARGHH!!

The Ogre fell from the stairs of another Alley, by then break his neck in the last step, dying in that moment. The Fluffy gang and Toralei didnt believed that they really killed someone.

Farid: *Panic Attack* Oh no! Oh no! we killed him! What we will do!? im too younger and beautiful to go to Jail!! D,:>!!

Toralei: Me Too! D,:<

Farren: *Slaps Farid* Farid Calm Down! this is not the moment for your whines!

Toralei: What we will do Farley?...

Farley:...Uhhhh... look! there is a tip to the sewers, we can throw the body there :D!.

Toralei: Good Idea >:D!.

Farren: Are we Literally ignore that we killed a man?..

Farid: *Sighs* at least we will not go to Jail ;w;

Farren: Ok lets do this!..

Then The Fluffy gang and Toralei with effort, they managed to threw the body of the Ogre to the sewers so anyone will not notice their crime.

Farren: Well, the Job is finished... what now?

Farid: Oww im Still hungry ....

Toralei: Guys, that man had a shop with full of food, thats where i taked the Bottle with milk wich is not in the ground...

Farley: Ok lets go for some snacks! :D

The Fluffly Gang and Toralei: Yay :D

Flashback Ends.

Farren: And thats How we meet Toralei

Farid: Cute isn't?

Meowlody: a little...

Purrsephone: we literrrally thought it was a joke.

Meowlody: And i cant believe that you killed a man..

Farid: We were just babies, we didnt know what we are doing heheh~

Claw: hm?

Meowlody: and this little one?

Farren: Its Claw, His Dying mother gave him to us to save him from the hunters, so he lives with us as a younger sibling, The Principal Stratos usually overprotects him.

P&M: Thats so cute from you part mew~

Claw: *sniffs them* mew

P&M: *sniff him* ...

Claw: *purrrs*

P&M: Awww

Farley: I cant believe we are finally together

Toralei: Me too! ;w; *Purring* I missed you so much!

Farley: *Waving tail* I missed you too!

Frankie: Its so Cute to see this...

Meanwhile..

Manny Taur

A Fucking Minotaur Bully

Age: 17

Species: Minotaur

Gender: Male

Manny: Aww look at this, what are you supossed to be Rabbit?

Bradley: a Vampire/Jackalope Hybrid

Manny: Hah! Vampire!? but youre so tiny

Bradley: well at least the size your dick compensates the size of your brain and intelligence..

Manny: *blushes* How dare you!?

Bradley: well.. its part of your biology..

Manny: Thats it you are Death!

Frankie: Manny No!

Manny was about to Hit Bradley (wich didnt seem scared) but suddenly he was attacked by Skeebo before he would hurt his beloved bunny.

Skeebo: Dont you dare to hurt my boyfriend!

Manny: Your Boyfriend? *chuckles* dont play dumb, you are a fox and Foxes eats rabbits like him!

Skeebo: *Whispers* Shh shh please dont expose what i do with him everynight~

Bradley: im an Arctic Hare not a rabbit...wait*blushes* Skeebo!

Skeebo: Sorry Dear~

Manny: you guys are gross...

Frankie: Thats Enough Manny, do you want me to tell Minnie about your Behavior?

Manny: Oh no! Please dont tell my sister!...

Skeebo: Heh... he is afraid of his sister~

Manny: At least i have a sister

Skeebo: !!!......

Bradley: You son of a Bitch! how dare you!? just because you heard the most of us are orphans doesnt give you the rights of making fun of Us!

Frankie: Wait.. are you Orphans?..

Skeebo: Thats it!...

A Fight Started between Manny and Skeebo, but it was stopped by Miss Bloodgood and Stratos.

Bloodgood: You 2 Stop!

Stratos: You both will go to detention!..

Manny: Thats why Maze High is a bad copy of Monster High, the Students here are all Awfull!!

All: *Gasps*

Claw: *Cries*

Farley/Toralei: What did you said!?

Farren/Farid: You will pay for this!

Betrayus: calm down.. not here!

Skeebo: You said that because at least all of you have their own families...

Bloodgood: Manny Taur...you will be grounded by the rest of the event, the meeting is over..

Stratos: Mistress Bloodgood...I am so sorry for this..

Bloodgood: No no... its not your fault, *sighs* i will correct my student.. Good luck in the event..

Stratos: Good luck for you too...

Manny: *gulp*...

Stratos: Me too...

Frankie: Oh gosh.. i am so sorry..

Skeebo: Its Okay.. we are all used to be seeing like this..*Leaves* Bradley: Skeebs...*sighs*.... its true... While me as some less of my classmates.. mostly of them are all orphan.. for it they basically live here..

Frankie: Ou... i have no idea..

Bradley: Its okay.. as my boyfriend said.. we are used to be judged by other schools... and... Mostly of that students from other schools have their own families...*follows Skeebo*...

Frankie: *Sighs*

The meeting ended and the Monster High Students returned to their homes, while the students from Maze high returned to their dorms, an exception to Farley and Toralei wich where in the school garden trying to calm down Claw.

Farley: Awww Claw dont cry, he will not hurt you.

Toralei: when i see him, i will scratch his ugly bull face so nobody will recognize him not even with the passaport.

Claw: *sob* *sob*

Toralei: Dont Cry little Fella, that awfull bull will not hurt you anymore *pets Claw*

Claw: *Purrs*

Farley: Thank you Toralei, maybe im tired of the boring boomer of Stratos but he still needs a rest.

Toralei: You dont have to thank me, this fella needed it.

Farley: thats right...*Blushes* Its so nice to have you here..

Toralei: *Blushes* Ahh.. yeah i feel the same, heh

Farley: You want me to accompany to your home?

Toralei: Nah, i can go by myself, cats loves nocturnal walks.

Farley: W-w-well see you tomorrow..

Toralei: S-see you T-tomorrow...

Toralei left the gardens to return to her home, while Farley was watching her leave still blushed.

Farley: *sighs*

Claw:*giggles*

Farley: what?..

To be Continued..

[silvermoonflowers]

Moonflower Act II

Priestess!Reader x Demon!Bucky Summary: What seems like an beautiful day, turns into a nightmare rather quickly. Warnings: Battle violence and creepy demons Act I 

A few leaves fluttered down and landed in the hair of your beloved younger sister, Nicole. You reached over and plucked them out as Nicole sighed and closed her eyes at your gentle touch. An affectionate smile formed on your lips. It had been a few weeks since your fateful encounter with James. His gift, the moonflower, was just as real as he had stated. With the moonflower as the final ingredient for the medicine you made, Nicole’s illness faded away and she was back in full health. The cheers from your friends probably could’ve been heard miles away. However, you could tell that the others were still mystified as to where you got the moonflower from, especially Steve. His curious stares were practically burnt into the back of your head. But you weren’t ready to tell them, not knowing how they would react when they found out the moonflower was from a demon.

Not only that, but James’ last words were still haunting your mind to this day. He knew about your troubled past. But how? The only obvious answer was that he was a demon, so of course he knew. But why did he have to bring it up now? With that revelation and your duties as the Priestess, all this was only accumulating into a headache.

“Priestess. Nicole.”

Sam and Steve approached the both of you, a little girl happily running beside them. 

“You two are late, “You lightly teased as the little girl ran into your arms while Nicole waved at Sam and Steve. “Where are the others?”

“Natasha is just getting some things from the cellar,” Sam replied as he sat next to you. “She asked the others to help her. They’ll join us soon.”

“Sis!” The little girl said as she tugged on your sleeve. You smiled at her and ruffled her golden-blonde hair. “Good morning, Emily.”

Emily was the daughter of one of the neighbors that lived close to the residence. Because her parents were often busy, they had timidly asked if you could watch over her. You didn’t mind at all. Neither did anyone else. Emily was welcomed warmly by everyone and now she was practically part of the family. Since today was so beautiful, you wanted to make this a special occasion for Emily.

You watch as Emily giggled before running over to give Nicole a hug. It was moments like this that made you wish that life was just this peaceful. As you turned to talk to Sam, you felt his gaze on you again. You bit your lip.

For once, you just wished Steve would stop bothering you about what happened a few weeks ago. Yes, he has every right to be worried about you, especially since the demon encounter just happened to be at the place where you and everyone else lived. But this was something that couldn’t be talked about so easily. You needed time.

“Hey ~ ! We’re here!” Wanda’s voice rang out.

“Took you guys long enough, “ Sam grumbled as he stood up.

“We’re are we going?” Emily asked excitedly as she held onto Nicole’s hand.

“We’re going to the garden,” Clint answered as he carried a basket in one hand and a blanket slung on the other.

“You mean the garden planted by the Moon Goddess long ago?!” Emily’s eyes gleamed with joy.

“Yes,” Nicole said gently. 

“We’ll get you a gift too, Emily,” You said. “This is a beautiful day for a picnic.”

“Yay!”

You nearly jumped aside when you felt Steve practically right next to you. His gaze was burning into you again.

“Priestess.” His voice was only loud enough for you to hear. “You can’t hide the subject forever, so can we please talk about what just happened? I am very relieved that Nicole is healed, but what about that demon? Don’t tell me you got the moonflower from him. You are the Priestess, you know you mustn’t trust demons.”

You huffed in annoyance. He was right. You were the Priestess of the Silver Moon, sworn to protect humanity from demons. And yet...yet James was so different from all those monstrous creatures that you had encountered so many times. He was actually willing to spend his time just to find a flower that was so hard to find. You looked at Steve. Although his expression was stern, his eyes were pleading. It was now or never.

“I -”

But before you could reply, a dark presence suddenly arose, sending chills down your spine.

Oh no.

“Well, well what do we have here, the two Priestesses and their family of friends. What a lovely encounter.”

Demons. There were at least seven of them.

“Oh come on, can there be a day where you bastards don’t pop up?!” Sam said in annoyance as he pulled out his sword.

“Nicole, take Emily and hide somewhere safe,” You whispered when you noticed how pale your sister had become at the sight of a group of frightening demons. You couldn’t blame her. They were the reason why Nicole was ill in the first place. “Don’t worry, we’ll protect you two.”

“O-okay...but I wanted to fight with you though,” Nicole said quietly as she picked up Emily, who was shaking in fear.

“I know you want to, but we have Emily with us.”

Nicole nodded reluctantly. “Let the Moon goddess protect you and everyone. Please come back safe, sister.” You watched as Nicole and Emily disappeared behind a rather large tree before grabbing your bow and turning back to the demons. One of the larger monsters, the leader you presumed, gave you a rather sinister look.

“I can’t wait to get rid of you and your sister,” the demon sneered. “Without the two Priestesses, we can take over this kingdom.” “I highly doubt that,” You responded coldly as you grabbed an arrow and aimed it straight at the leader. 

A sharp sound cuts through the air as you shoot the arrow. But the leader dodged it and the arrow instead landed into the head of a smaller demon. It gave out an inhuman cry before fading away into mist.

Then chaos erupted.

There was the sound of swords clashing and energy bursting through the air as you and your friends fought the demons. You could hear the demon leader shouting “Get rid of her! Get rid of her!!” as you tried to keep shooting your arrows at him.

A clawed hand reached for you, only for it to be cut off by Steve’s sword. But you didn’t have time to thank him as another demon approached the both of you. Steve jumped in front of you protectively while you grabbed another arrow.

“These bastards don’t know when to give up!” Clint said as he practically shoved an arrow straight into the demon’s chest that stood way too close to him.

“Since when do they ever?” Natasha retorted as she stabbed the demon in the stomach with her lance. Sam finished it off by cutting off the demon’s head.

There were shrieks as Wanda managed to wipe away at least a couple of them. What remained of them were only scorch marks on the ground. Meanwhile Pietro sneaked up on a smaller one and cut off its legs before stabbing the demon in the head, killing it. The sounds of fighting were now alarming the people who just happened to live in the area where all of this was happening. They couldn’t believe that more demons were appearing in broad daylight. This was not good at all.

Behind the tree, Nicole held onto Emily tightly as she closed her eyes and prayed to the Moon goddess. 

Please be safe, please be safe, please be safe…!

Then...there was silence.

Nicole slowly opened her eyes and peered out from behind the tree. To her relief, she saw her family standing tired, but proud. They won the battle and everyone was safe.

“Wait a second,” Steve said. “Priestess, did you kill the leader?”

Your eyes widened. You were so busy trying to fight the others demons, that you had momentarily forgotten to kill the one who demanded orders. Where had he gone?!

Oh no, oh no…

“Sister!” Nicole called out as she appeared from the tree with Emily joining her a few seconds later. “Are you guys okay?”

“Ah-hah!” a deep voice said. “So that’s where your precious sister is! I’ll get rid of her first! Then you!”

To everyone’s horror, a shadow was quickly approaching Nicole and Emily. The leader had somehow hidden himself amongst the chaos just and appeared when the time was right...

No! NO!

Gritting your teeth you reached for another arrow, only to feel nothing but air. You were out of arrows. The others screamed out Nicole’s and Emily’s names as the shadow came closer and closer to them. Wanda hurriedly tried to gather energy to kill the leader.

Without hesitation, you grabbed Steve’s sword and ran out to where the shadow was. You would not let another demon harm your sister again!

“Nicole! Emily!”

Emily could be heard screaming while Nicole grabbed her and tried to outrun the demon who had now popped out from the shadow. You urged yourself to run faster, despite your legs becoming sore, while Steve yelled at Wanda to hurry it up.

Come on! Come on!

But before the demon could reach Nicole and Emily, an arrow suddenly hit the demon directly at its forehead. It let out a cursed scream before slumping to the ground, writhing in agony. Trying to ignore its inhuman groans, you turned to Clint, about to thank him. However he looked just as shocked as everyone else.

If that wasn’t Clint then who…?

As if answering your unspoken question, a cloaked figure appeared out of nowhere and leapt in front of your sister and Emily. A warm feeling rose within you. Even though you couldn’t see the person’s face, you had the feeling you knew who he was.

James...

[hasspartacusdoneanythingwrong]

The Century War of Wyverns, Part 2: Chase the French Soldier

[Previous] [Contents] [Next]

Kat: Our first encounters in a strange new land! It... doesn't go well tbh, but I'm sure the next one will!

Cris: Turns out Spartacus doesn't understand "the back of your blade" very well.

Jeanne: {CWs for violence against humans, death, first-person panic attack}

------

God dammit, how the hell can that mountain of muscle move so fast? We barely got a word in edgewise and he’s already left us in the dust! If we don’t get there in time those soldiers are gonna be a big red smear on the ground. One more hill, and… he’s just… standing there, having a conversation with them? He gestured towards the one in the gaudiest uniform before walking over.

Spartacus: Placet expectare.

Spartacus: Ah master, there you are! I have glorious news! These soldiers are themselves fighting against the oppression of a false king! Of course, a true king is also oppressive in its own way, but still! Their leader even speaks latin! Roughly.

French General: C'est ton géant ?

Kat: <Ooh, ooh! I got this! Time for all that duolingo to do its thing!>

April (Kat): Bonjour, garcon!

I internally rolled my eyes as the soldier blanched.

Cris: <Kat. Garcon means boy. Let’s try something else.>

April (Cris): (Hey, Mash, do you know French? Mine’s a little rusty.)

Mash: (Sorry master, I barely know enough to say hello.)

April (Jeanne): (Well, English is a common lingua franca, might as well try that, right?)

Cris: <Good idea!>

Mash: Wait, that’s-

April (Cris): Sorry about that, tried to be polite, don’t actually know that much French. The big guy’s with us, and we were hoping you… could… Ah, fuck.

The soldiers had already surrounded us. Cries of “L’Anglais!” erupted around us as they pointed their spears in our direction.

Mash: The French are at war with England in this time period!

April (Cris): I gathered, yeah.

Spartacus: So now they seek to oppress us as well?

Mash: What are your orders, master?

April (Cris): Take them down but try not to kill the idiots. Uh… hit them with the back of your blade, or something.

Mash lifted her shield up quizzically.

Mash: And what part of this, exactly, is the blade?

April (Cris): Dammit, just try not to kill them!

Even holding back, it was clear the soldiers were no match for Mash Kyrielight. She ran circles around them, their every attack parried as their weapons shattered against their shield. Even three on one, the soldiers didn’t stand a chance. Meanwhile, Spartacus ha- oh God.

I faltered, stumbled off the road and retched. If Mash had a spotless technique, Spartacus’ was nothing but spots. He simply walked from soldier to soldier and shattered their bodies with his fists. He hadn’t even bothered to draw his sword. The few soldiers Mash pacified were bruised, but relatively unharmed. The ones unlucky enough to face Spartacus weren’t going to get back up.

The forest span <Jeanne?> around me. I know someone was calling our name, but I couldn't <Jeanne!> hear anything beyond the blood rushing to my head. My chest hurt, I couldn't breathe, I couldn't- <JEANNE!>

A sharp sting as my hand slapped my cheek. Cris stopped me from spiraling again. I took a moment to breathe properly.

April (Jeanne): Okay… Okay, I’m good. I think.

I slowly stood up and made it back to the others. The surviving French soldiers had already made their escape. Mash’s spirit origin was shaking. I put my hand on her shoulder as I got closer.

April (Jeanne): Mash, are you alright?

Mash: I should be asking you that, Master. I’m… I can’t believe it, but I’m still not used to this.

April (Jeanne): It’s only been a day or two Mash, you don’t have to force yourself to be okay with this.

Mash: A day? Oh, right.

Spartacus: Mmh. It might be better for you two if you don’t become comfortable in these sorts of things. The two of you are unoppressed by the experience of warfare. Hold that close to you.

Mash: Right. Thank you, Spartacus. So, what’s our next move?

April (Cris): Right, I hate to do this, but… we need to follow the soldiers that ran off.

Spartacus: Ahah, we must finish the fight then?

April (Cris): NO! Nonono. I mean, they’re going to run to the nearest place with people. They’re our only lead right now. Did you see which way they went, Spartacus?

Spartacus: Of course! Follow me!

----

On our way, we got in contact with Dr. Roman again. Turns out our plugsuit comes equipped with a translator- would have come in handy earlier, but fuck it, at least we won’t have to fight literally everyone we come across.

The sky was turning red when we finally saw the smoke clouds over the horizon. We rushed over a hill and finally got a look at the fort. It was in bad shape. Walls crumbled in, with smoke and fire billowing out from several windows. Dark shapes moved through the smoke, obscured in a haze.

Another wall fell over as we descen-

Kat: <Hey, look! Isn’t that one of the soldiers?>

Sure enough, one of the survivors of Spartacus’ rampage was kneeling at the top of the hill.

April (Cris): Hey! Hey you! Don’t fucking run, I’m talking to you!

The soldier had started, but before he made it to his feet we were already surrounding him. He was speaking too fast to translate at first, so I just pressed on.

April (Cris): Look, I get it if you don’t believe us, but we’re not gonna kill you.

April (Jeanne): We have traveled a long way because we heard something very, very bad was happening here. Please, can you tell us what is going on?

French Soldier: Oh, and what are the English going to do about it?! Insult her and run away?

Cris: <Apparently we can do a lot fucking more than your soldiers can.>

April (Jeanne): We have fought worse. Now, who is this “her”?

French Soldier: You’ve fought worse than Jeanne d’Arc? Hah! Unlikely!

Mash: Jeanne d’Arc? She should be dead by this point!

French Soldier: That is the worst part, she is! She was dead for three days, when the Saint of Orleans appeared out of nowhere and started razing all of France to the ground. She’s been tearing around with an Army of monsters for days now! Even King Charles couldn’t stand up to her!

April (Jeanne): Thank you. We will figure out a way to stop this, I promise.

By the time we got closer to the ruined fort, whatever had caused so much damage had long since disappeared. However, I could still make out faint traces of enchantment on some of the bodies scattered around the field.

April (Jeanne): Roman, I'm noticing something off about this corpse. What do you make of it?

Mash: Senpai, we really should get out of the open while there’s still daylight.

April (Jeanne): Give Roman a second, Mash. I'm sure there's something off about it.

Roman: Huh. Good catch, April. This body had been treated for necromancy. Large-scale necromancy is certainly rare, but it’s still possible with or without a holy grail. Either way, it’s good to have an idea of what we’re up against.

We entered the keep. Walking around was a nightmare, it was as if every square inch of space was taken up by the injured. Their groans echoed through the fort. Suddenly, I felt something on the edge of my scanning area. It was faint, but unmistakable. A spirit origin.

April (Jeanne): Mash, do you feel that?

Mash: Barely. There must be a servant outside the castle.

April (Jeanne): No, about thirty feet in that direction. Does anyone catch your eye?

Mash: There’s no one there who could be a servant, Master.

Cris: <This is pointless, let me look.>

Kat: <No way! You got to yell at the guy, lemme look, lemme look!>

Yay, I won! I turned where Jeanne was pointing. The whole place was just beat up soldiers & less beat up soldiers taking care of them. Oh, there’s one! A little girl is going around comforting people as they fall asleep!

April (Kat): What about that little girl? The one dressed in all white? Can she be a servant?

Roman: That’s not likely. Servants are invariably summoned at the “peak” of their myth. It’s possible for child prodigies to be summoned young, but the vast majority will either be young adults when they are most powerful, or at old age when they are most skilled. You guys should get some rest while you can. I’ve detected a leyline a day’s travel from here, you should set out in the morning.

We found a spot near a wall and curled up to sleep. I don’t remember much of my dreams, but when I woke up it was still dark. That girl was still tiptoeing around the soldiers, and every now and then I caught her singing, at barely above a whisper.

That was weird enough, but then something amazing happened! The soldier she was standing next to, his wounds suddenly shrank, until it was like he never got hurt at all! He shifted in his sleep, and she moved on to the next one.

April (Kat): (I knew it!)

I pulled myself out of our pile as slow as possible, and inched closer to her.

April (Kat): Excuse me?

Little Girl: Hello miss. (Please keep your voice down, people are sleeping!)

April (Kat): (Oh, sorry! This might sound weird, but… are you a servant?)

Little Girl: (I am a faithful servant of God, yes. Is something wrong?)

April (Kat): (That’s not exactly what I meant. I mean are you human?)

A strange look crossed the girls face.

Little Girl: (I was. Let’s talk outside.)

She led me by the hand out of the castle. She had such a strong grip, it was kinda awkward! Once we were a bit away, she turned to face me. Suddenly, a spear covered in flags appeared out of nowhere and landed in her hands!

Little Girl: As you have guessed, I am indeed a Servant, Lancer class. My true name is Jeanne d’Arc.

[spark-translations]

Translation: Wonderlands x Showtime Main Story Ch. 4 [Find Members!]

Translation under the cut!

The Wonderland Sekai

Tsukasa: Hah!

Emu: Ah, you’re awake! Tsukasa-kun, you okay?

Tsukasa: I-it was a dream! Of course it is. There’s no way a weird place and a weird Miku and a weird stuffed animal could exist... 

Miku: Tsukasa-kun, you okay?

Bunny Stuffed Animal: Does your head hurt?

Tsukasa: It’s not a dream!!

Tsukasa: What’s going on...! Why do I have to go through this!

KAITO: Mm... We’re in a bit of a conundrum now. Seems like having you remember your true feelings is the least of our worries.

Tsukasa: Back! I’m going back! Right. If I stop that “Untitled” song...

Tsukasa: It’s not here... My phone’s not here! No way...

Tsukasa: Aaah! I’ll do anything if you let me out of here! I think I’m going to go insane!!

Emu: Anything!?

Emu: Tsukasa-kun, you’ll do anything? Then, will you do shows with me at the Wonder Stage?

Tsukasa: Ah! If I can get out of here, I’ll do anything!

Emu: Yay~! It’s a promise! Okay, let’s search for your phone together!

Emu: Uhm, Tsukasa-kun’s phone... Ah, there it is! It’s stuck on that tree.

Tsukasa: Really!? You found it so quickly!

Emu: I have good eyes~ ♪ There we go! Here, Tsukasa-kun!

Tsukasa: Good job! Now, if I stop “Untitled”, it’s goodbye to this place!

Miku: Ah~! Wait up~!

Wonder Stage

Tsukasa: Uh... Where am I..? Ah! It’s the run-down stage from before!

Tsukasa: I did it... I made it back! I made it back alive from that nightmare!

Emu: It was such a fun place!

Emu: Tsukasa-kun, let’s make shows as fun as that one together ♪

Tsukasa: Leave it to me! ...Mm?

Tsukasa: Wait. Why do I have to do shows with you?

Emu: Eh? But Tsukasa-kun, you promised that “I’ll do anything if you let me out of here!”, right?

Tsukasa: Uh... I feel like I said that, but I might have not... No, that was a dream…

Emu: You promised, right...?

Tsukasa: Uu...

Mascot Costume: You!! What are you doing, kidnapping Miss Emu!!

Tsukasa: Hah!? Kidnapping!?

Mascot Costume: There’s evidence left on the camera inside this mascot costume! To think that you would blind us with the light from your smartphone and then run...!

Tsukasa: N-no! I did no such thing...! Wait, there’s a camera in the mascot costume!?

Mascot Costume: Don’t play the fool!! I’m sure you came back because you valued your life enough, but I won’t forgive you!!

Tsukasa: Uoh!? P-painful! Painful~!!

Tsukasa: (What is happening!? Kidnapping, or Miss...! Wait, is the Miss about that person!?)

Emu: You can’t fight~!

Emu: Tsukasa-kun is an important friend who I’m going to do shows with! He’s going to fill this stage up with smiles ♪

Emu: So, you have to get along!

Mascot Costume: (Stops.)

Mascot Costume: You. Are you really going to do shows here with Miss Emu?

Tsukasa: U-uh, you see, that’s...

Mascot Costume: (Glare.)

Tsukasa: (This mascot costume has an unreal amount of arm strength...! If I say no, he’ll k-kill me...!)

Mascot Costume: I’m asking you a question... Are you going to do shows with Miss Emu?

Tsukasa: Y-yes! I will do shows with Emu-san.

Mascot Costume: And you’re telling the truth!?

Tsukasa: Eek..! I’ll do my best and put all my heart and soul into it!!

Emu: Yay!! Yay, yay!!

Tsukasa: Ngeh... Cough, cough...! Wasn’t that just intimidation...?

Emu: Tsukasa-kun, thank you! I’m very happy!

Emu: Ehehe~ what show should we do ♪ Ah! How about the world of stars show, Tsukasa-kun!

Tsukasa: Hah... Why did it end up like this... 

Tsukasa: Actually, reaching stardom despite being in adverse circumstances sounds like a nice storyline... I should always stay positive!

Tsukasa: Umu! If I’m going to do it, I’ll go all out! I’ll make it a show worthy of having me, a star, in it!

Emu: Uh-huh! Let’s make a sparkly, shalala~☆ type show!

Tsukasa: Now that that’s decided, let’s get some more members!

Emu: Members?

Tsukasa: If it’s just us and the mascot costume, we can’t make a good show. We need more actors.

Emu: You’re right! It’s more fun with everyone! Okay, let’s go searching!

Phoenix Wonderland

Tsukasa: ...I said that, but there’s no way we’ll find someone that easily...

Emu: Tsukasa-kun, look, look! There are a lot of tiny robots!

Tsukasa: Robots? You’re saying weird things again... Mm...? What is that..?

???: Fufu, today, they’re in a very good mood. Why, you may ask? That’s because they can do a show here.

???: Now, my excellent clockwork actors —it’s showtime.

Tsukasa: What... is that!?

previous + next

[purplesurveys]

1240

Are you better at cooking dinners or making cakes/biscuits/sweets?  I can’t make any dish. I wonder when I’ll get my ass up and start learning...

Have you ever cut someone else’s hair?  I wouldn’t dare; I have no skills in that department at all.

Who was the last guest in your house and what were they staying for?  Angela and Hans came over so we can watch Sowoozoo. 

How many long term relationships have you been in?  One.

Do you sleep with all the lights out, or do you leave a lamp or even the television on?  My default is lights out, but sometimes I’ll fall asleep with my night lamp still on and that’s fine too.

Who is one person you have forgiven, but still have not “forgotten” what they have done?  I don’t really do forgiving.

Are you a fan of Lana Del Rey?  No. I’ve tried listening to her songs but I find them too slow for my liking.

Do you know your blood type?  It’s O but I keep forgetting what specific type.

Do you know your mother’s birthday?  Yes.

Have you got your period at the moment?  It’s on its last few days.

Have you ever been pregnant?  Nopes.

How old were you when you first went on a plane?  I was around 10 or 11, can’t remember exactly. But it was in 2009 and we headed to Boracay.

Have you ever had to take out a loan for anything?  No. OMG, adult activity I don’t quite understand just yet hfdhfkdjfhdf.

Are both of your blood parents still in your life?  Yeah they’re both grumbling right now just outside of my room because the power went out lmfao.

When was the last time you went apple picking?  I’ve never done this. Apples don’t grow here.

Someone asked you what you wanted, what would you say?  My pay for the last two weeks haha, but that’s not coming until Friday.

Have you ever been drunk at school or work?  No, I wouldn’t dare. I’m pretty unpredictable when I get drunk, so I’d rather stay safe haha. I’ve worked while tipsy, but it had been outside of work hours.

How many bedrooms are in your house?  4. One for each kid, then my parents’.

Are you smart about computers?  Nah.

Have you ever played Just Dance for Wii?  We didn’t have the game on our Wii, but I’ve played Just Dance before, just at other peoples’ houses.

Do you own a Xbox 360?  We were a Playstation household.

Would you ever do a sex tape for a million dollars?  Erm, sure, whatever.

So, do you need a nap?  I think I should be taking one for the sake of my health, but I won’t.

What would you rather be doing?  I stumbled upon a Facebook post of this newly-opened store in Greenhills that exclusively sells photocards and I wanna head the fuck over there rn with Angela. That store concept is practically unheard of so it’s a big deal and I wanna go there as I’m 100% sure the BTS ones would sell out pretty fast. But they heightened the stupid COVID protocols yet again and we have to stay at home, so there’s that.

What sport are you the best at?  Table tennis.

Do you have a little sister? What’s her name?  Yeah but she’s turning 21 this year, so little wouldn’t be accurate anymore. We call her Nina at home but everyone else calls her by her full first name, Janina.

Do you complain a lot?  I do complain a lot but I also do the thing that is causing the complaint right after so I can shut myself up lmao.

Would you rather go to an authentic haunted house or an ancient temple?  Both sound fun but I’ll probably take the temple. Yay for learning something new about culture!!

Do you like fruity or minty gum?  I don’t mind flavor when it comes to gum because they fade out anyway.

Are you looking forward to any day of this month?  My company set another mental health break day this upcoming August 27th, so I’ll be thinking about that day throughout the month.

Have you ever gotten detention?  We don’t have detention.

Is there a traumatic event that you’ve experienced that’s changed your life?  Sure.

Do you buy a majority of your clothes from a certain store, or do you just pick out items of clothing you could see yourself wearing, not caring about the store it came from? The latter. < Same. I can be brand-conscious sometimes, but generally if I find something cute, regardless from where I found it, I’d grab it.

Have any of the artists you’re fond of released new albums recently?  Technically yeah. It was a single album. 

Would you ever keep your favorite animal as a pet?  I already have two of them.

Ever cried so much you threw up?  Possibly.

Who is your best guy friend? Hans.

What do you two do when you hang out?  We usually eat out and have a drink or two.

What is a movie that you thought you would hate but you ended up loving?  Spotlight, just because it looked boring at first glance. It turned out to be very riveting and the screenplay was fascinating as well.

Do you even like horror movies?  Yes, but they’re best watched with other people.

Do you live in the country?  Nopes.

What is your favorite accent?  I don’t have one.

Have you ever had a boyfriend your parents didn’t like?  No.

Do you drink Pepsi or Coke?  I had the chance to try out Pepsi when we went to Taco Bell two weeks ago - it was my first time to have it and it was...actually pretty good??? The soda-hater in me was scandalized HAHAHA but it was good!!! I think I prefer Pepsi now.

What do you plan to do on your 21st birthday?  My 21st birthday started out terribly because Gabie’s family didn’t want her to hang out with me on a Sunday (the day my birthday fell on), so we were in an argument the whole day. Angela saved the day when she planned out an impromptu dinner + arcade date for me, and that was the only good part of the day, really. I’d rather forget the rest of it.

Do you have any person in your family with an addiction to beer?  I don’t think so.

Do you take a lot of pictures?  I’m starting to, now.

What kind of face wash do you use?  Good ol’ water.

Does drama always seem to follow you?  Not these days.

Does anybody in your family race?  Nope.

Are you closer to your mom or dad?  Dad, I guess. But I wouldn’t particularly call myself ‘close’ with either.

How much money did you used to get from the ”tooth fairy?”  I never received money from them.

How long do you want to live with your parents?  Maybe up until my mid-20s? Late-20s at the latest. I’m not exactly in the position to move out yet. The money I make at the moment would probably just be enough to cover rent, and just rent. I’d end up starving to death hahaha.

Do you have a laptop or desktop?  Laptop.

Do you like your parents?  Sure.

Do you secretly like someone?  I don’t.

Would you ever date your best male friend?  No. I also wouldn’t do that to Angela.

What are you currently listening to?  Moon by Jin! Such a comfort song.

Do you want to be single?  Yes.

Did you go out or stay in last night?  I stayed in and was knocked out pretty early since I had been up since 1 AM.

Have you pretended to like someone?  No. I don’t see why I would have to that.

How is your heart lately?  Just filled with nothing but Bangtan at this point haha. It’s doing well!

Are you wearing socks?  No. Socks bother me for the most part; they make my feet feel a bit suffocated.

What do people call you?  Robyn.

Do you get stressed out easily?  Yeah, I’m quite the overthinker.

Have you ever been taken to the emergency room in an ambulance?  No, I’ve never actually been inside an ambulance, whether it came for me or for another person.

What is wrong with you right now?  I should probably cut back on the vaping, for one.

Do you own something from Hot Topic?  No.

Would you rather sleep with someone else or alone?  It’s hard for me to sleep with someone else. Even when I had been in a relationship, I usually only got to fall asleep an hour or so after my partner already dozed off.

Do you still talk to the person you last made out with?  No, I cut ties at the start of the year and have been substantially better since then.

Have you ever seen your best friend cry?  I honestly don’t think so. I’m the bigger crybaby between us.

Did you get any compliments today?  My mom thanked me for covering for Cooper’s shots today since they ended up being quite costly.

Have you ever gone to a beach?  Yes, it’s one of my absolute favorite places to be.

What would you say if someone asked you to get high right now?  Pass up on the offer.

Do you believe that everything happens for a reason?  Yes.

Have you ever done volunteer work just because you wanted to?  I’ve never had the ample time to, so no. I’ve always wanted to volunteer at an animal shelter, though.

Do you have long nails?  They’re not dramatically long, but they have started to grow out.

Do you like the gender you are? I don't like or dislike it, honestly. I'm just neutral. < Same.

Do you generally look nice in photos?  I think this is the case these days, yeah. I’ve started feeling more confident and I think it’s able to translate in photos.

Have you ever had a stick insect as a pet?  No.

What colour are your father’s eyes?  Dark brown.

If I handed you a concert ticket right now, who would you want to be the performer?  BTS DUH

Name three facts about your family?  I come from a family of lawyers; many of us are big history buffs; and many are also fantastic cooks so I don’t know where that talent could have possibly gone when it come to my generation hah.

Would you ever get into a long distance relationship?  If I’ve reached a certain level of investment in the relationship, I could probably handle it. 

What’s the most thoughtful present you’ve ever received?  A Punk shirt and Petals For Armor physical CD from Andi this last Christmas.

What’s your favorite hot beverage? Hot chocolate. < Yessssss!

Did you ever play an instrument? If so what?  I don’t.

Would you rather carve pumpkins or wrap presents?  Carving pumpkins sounds fun, especially since I haven’t tried it before.

Do you think you’re important?  Idk. I don’t really like drawing attention to myself though, so that could probably answer your question.

What’s the best compliment you’ve ever received?  Andi wrote a letter for me to accompany the aforementioned Christmas gifts they gave, and it remains to be my favorite letter I’ve received. They essentially reminded and affirmed me that I’m stronger than I think I am, and that I’ve been through a lot and have grown a lot, and that that growth is seen by people around me.

Have you been diagnosed with any mental disorders?  No.

Have you ever moved to another state or country? If so, how did it feel to be new?  Just to different cities, but considering how tiny my country is, the move is quite insignificant lol.

Do you know how to properly eat food with chopsticks?  I’m 100% sure I don’t know how to properly hold chopsticks, but I have my own way and it works lol. Fake it til you make it.

Are you more of a leader or a follower? Definitely a follower, but I can step up in certain situations. < Same. I don’t mind leading, especially considering the control freak I can be lolol.

What was the first thing you ate today?  I haven’t eaten anything today. I skipped breakfast since I brought Cooper to the vet, and by the time I got back the dining table had already been cleared. It’s fine though, I don’t feel too hungry.

If you could spend the day, doing absolutely anything, with anyone, anywhere, what would it be like?  I’d be with Angela, Reena, and Hans at that insane new photocard store I talked about earlier. IDEALLY, we’d probably pick up a photocard or two if the ones we want aren’t sold out yet (lol a rarity), then we’d have some nachos and stuff right after and just talk about all things Bangtan lol with Hans cracking us up the whole time since he is just naturally hilarious.

If I were to ask you how you are doing, and you were only able to answer completely honestly, what would come out?  Content. Happy. I feel warm and loved and surrounded by the best people.

What is the one thing that you have been avoiding that you should do?  Learning how to cook is one.

Is there anything that you wish you could take back?  Not really.

What, in your mind, could make you truly happy?  Being in the purple ocean with my best friends.

If you could change one conversation in your life, what would you say differently? Would it have REALLY made any difference?  A part of me wishes my final face-to-face conversation with Gabie had been a more solid closure, just so we could finally put a hard stop to that chapter. But at that time I thought we would continue talking, so there had still been some stuff lingering in the air when we called it a day and parted ways. So in a sense we never really got closure when I finally cut ties, which the ESTJ in me remains to be nagged by, but I try not to be bothered by it anymore considering how much better I am doing right now. We didn’t know the future at the time, so it’s okay the way things turned out, ultimately.

When is the next time you’ll change your hairstyle? Will you color it?  I have no clue. It’s not really a priority.

Do people normally say you’re a fast typist, or are you rather slow?  I’m fast.

Have you ever been considered the ‘smartest person in school?’  Nah.

How many drugs are in your system?  Just caffeine.

What’s on your schedule for tomorrow? Werkwerkwerkwerk.

Do you currently have any bite marks/hickeys on your body?  Nopes.

Do you call anyone baby?  I don’t.

What’s your current mood?  I’m prety neutral. I wish I could be out right now, but stupid Covid and stupid quarantine. But I don’t really mind staying at home, either, so. I’m just so-so.

Do you think you are a good person?  I hope so.

What were you doing before filling out this survey?  I watched Sunday mass with my family.

How late did you stay up last night?  Around midnight.

When was the last time you cried really hard?  I cried just a few days ago because period hormones, but the last time I cried hard? I’m not sure. April maybe?

Is your hair longer than your shoulders?  LOL yes it’s soooooooo long already.

[deltastorm101]

So, I tried to calculate Control...

... and its Epic Games deal, with the help of my certified smooth brain™ and probably incorrect sources. I started this last night hella tired and with a headache, I have finished it up today hella tired and with a headache, and this is what I produced: bullshit! :D But hey, at least double checked bullshit that’s open for discussion and contribution and expansion. Also, I probably won’t list the sources because a) I’m lazy and b) I didn’t have to dig thaaat deep down to find all this so if you really wanna know you could probably hit google with it as well. Anyhow here we go lol So, the initial thought which got all of this rolling was the 2020-wrap-up-post Remedy linked on their twitter, and Epic’s linked publishing announcement in it: studios Remedy, Playdead and GenDesign will release their next next-gen games with Epic. Now, we all know Remedy are working on some sort of Alan Wake-ish thing as we speak (right? right?? god I hope so), which meanssss our boy will most likely be an Epic exclusive. Which makes me kinda sad because, well. I’m deep in Steam’s ass. Hell, I waited for Control for a full year before I played it because they can pry the Steam version from my cold dead hands. So I asked myself... was it worth it for them? How much money did they throw at Remedy (and 505 Games) to have them play along? Would they have reached more people from the get-go if they had released it on Steam right away? Did the individual programmer, designer, writer, artist, person behind it profit from this at all? (Also, like, about the rights and copyright thing,,,,, you’d think they could have learned from Alan Wake and its IP belonging to Microsoft and so not really being able to do anything more with it because they don’t ‘own’ it and shit) buuut anyway that’s not the point of this post, now it’s time to do some MATH BABEY

Ok, let’s start with some things we know. Facts. Figures. Data. Turns out my initial question, how much money was involved, could be answered by doing one (1) google search: according to Wikipedia, Epic gave Remedy and 505 Games €9.49mio. The total budget for the game was €26.9mio over the course of 3 years of development. We know that as of December 2020, over 2mio copies of the game were sold, with November 2020 being the best-selling month ever since its initial release in August 2019. This is where question 1) comes into play: how many of those 2 million copies were sold in 2019 and how many in 2020? Stay tuned, I think I found out.

We know that Remedy gets to keep 45% of the revenue, which, I assumed, means that 505 keeps the remaining 55% (probably a lot more going on there but shhh). We know that Control’s sales cooked up €17.84mio in 2019 (so months September – December), €17.7mio of those in the first month alone (O.O). Side note: because it came out at the very end of August, I’ll ignore that month and declare September the first sales month.

We know that 60% of sales in 2019 were digital ones (aka Epic Store, mostly), 40% physical ones (consoles PS4 and XB1), while in 2020, only 10% of sales were physical and a whopping 90% digital; which is people on Epic who wanted to get their hands on the first DLC and – you guessed it – the Steam release of the Ultimate Edition in August 2020.

Which begs question 2): what’s bigger, 60% of 2019 sales because ‘ooh shiny new game’, or 90% of 2020 sales because ‘yay steam release’? The answer may look obvious, but you have to take into account the dropping price, which I also researched for your pleasure and enjoyment.

For this I used a German website called idealo.de, which focuses on looking for the best deals for basically anything you can buy on the internet, and it also gives you diagrams that describe at which point in time the product was at which exact price. This is what it gave me: - release price: €60 - December 2019: €41 (PS4)/€44 (XB1) - mid-2020: €30 - Ultimate Edition release: €30 - December 2020: €14 (PS4)/€18 (XB1)/€30 (Ultimate Editions) At this point I was like “lol hold on i need chocolate for this cuz i’ll be here for some time *sweating*”

To continue this mess™, I see more questions: 3) How many employees does Remedy have, which positions do they work in and what are their salaries? 4) How many employees does 505 have, which positions and salaries do they have? 5) What’s the total revenue that Control has generated so far?

And also some more stuff like, are my numbers accurate, am I even grasping these concepts correctly, are there even more people involved or am I just trying to explain complete crap (yes) but let’s just ignore all of that shall we. At that point I went “oh shit what have i gotten myself into, this screen does not get my point across, i need pen and paper” and you know shit is gonna go DOWN when I do math on paper.

My paper math birthed the following calculation:

Following this up, we can calculate the end-of-2019 sales, if we set the price for September and October to €60, for November and December to approx. €45:

Now, you might notice that one of those numbers is big and the other is HUGE. Why might that be? Well...

- Covid19: everyone stayed at home and needed video games to play - More sale months of the year, naturally - dropping price: why get it for €60 when you can get it for 20 - Ultimate Edition: why buy it in June when you get more content in August aaaand... - it comes out on Steam.

With this in mind, let’s see what questions we can answer: 1) 661,110 copies in 2019; 1,338,889 copies in 2020 2) 60% digital sales in 2019 means 396,666 Epic copies; 90% digital sales in 2020 means 1,205,000 copies – most of it from Steam? Some of it? A good chunk? The bigger chunk? There’s no way of really knowing for sure but... you could read this into it. I definitely am. 3) Google told me Remedy had a little over 250 employees at the end of 2019... 4) ... and 505 has less than 100. I found no good sources for this, I think linkedin said 37, someone else said 50. I’ll just use the 50 figure, idk. No idea man. and for 5) I’ll contradict my point that the Steam release is what knocked the sales out of the park and assume that the number of sold copies stayed the same across all 12 months of 2020, which gives us this:

Ok and now we’re getting into the most dangerous of danger zones because I have no idea how companies or capitalism work, so for educated people™, the remaining calculations might read like a toddler wrote them; I apologize profusely and hereby present last night’s brain vomit:

As stated earlier, development took 3 years, but everyone wanted to get paid in 2020 as well so let’s use 4 years to find out the salaries, which is 48 months. Let’s assume the utopian idea that every employee on the line here gets the exact same amount of money (LOL ikr but shhhh, let’s live out our dirtiest equality fantasies for a second ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)). Which would mean...

And now without the Epic Deal™:

Quod erat demonstrandum. Remedy has been selling their souls to Epic for €350 a month since 2017. (I don’t mean this as maliciously as I’m making it sound, don’t worry xD)

OKAY SO, O B V I O U S L Y, I have not the slightest idea what on earth I’m talking about so read this like you’d read a good fanfiction. We don’t know the different salaries across the different positions (and genders HAH), we don’t know if other parties were involved, I’ve completely ignored the sum that Epic themselves get, I have ignored taxes, I don’t know if my numbers are accurate (they’re definitely not I mean 505 must have more employees than 50), if I made mistakes (yes), and also somewhere along the way I forgot to use the €26.9mio budget figure because, uuh, I have no idea where to use it, what it means, where did it come from, where did it go, cotton eye joe - but oh well, I’m not starting over, take it or leave it.

So... I can now officially say I have written hot steamy economics fic xD Man I put waaay too much time into this but damn was it fun. Good three-hour-deep-dive (two of them spent munching on chocolate half-asleep listening to psytrance to keep my brain twitchy). Real-life-theorizing. Fuck capitalism. Don’t do drugs. Pet a cat. Wear your mask. Call your grandparents.

If there’s typos in this I’m sorry but also I’m not, I can’t be bothered to proofread again lol. Goodnight imma catch up on the sleep I lost. Gotta love full moons