#(Btw for anyone who forgot / wasn't there at the time: the first 3 season 5 episodes had to be ready earlier for an early screening.

[sskk-manifesto]

:/

[ivys-garden]

Hivy, I'm Ivy, and it's time for..

Life Series Alliance Analysis Session Recap:

Scars Snail cam is the best thing to happen this season.

Yes, another week means another session of Wild Life and damn did this one live up to the name. This session's Wild Card was the Infamous immortal snail, an idea originating from a meme that asked if you would press a button to get one million dollars if it meant an unkillable Snail would Chase you and if it ever touched you, you'd die.

This session's snails were far more dangerous though, resulting in far more carnage and downright Junji Ito-Esk descriptions of the incredibly ominous snails. On session 3 there are already 3 reds on the server and, had Grian not called end of session early, we would have had a first player out. So much happened and yet no progress was made, let's see what the teams were up to.

Also, 34 DEATHS WHAT THE FU

The Fast And The Furious (Gem & Joel)

I'm not calling them the family. That name is already taken. And is also lame.

The dynamic duo start the session by immediately forgetting they're supposed to be trying to shake their Villainous reputation by vowing to convince everyone to kill Pearl & Impulse, an incredibly stupid plot for many reasons:

1.Everyone they convince sucks at they're job

2. By gems own admission, Impulse barely did anything to her

3.joel literally forgot about this, since it wasn't important

4. Pearl literally did nothing to her, she was just they're as Impulse was having a rake in there chest (no the poisoning doesn't count, Pearl would do that to anyone)

5. If Pearl is to be punished for just being in the area, then why aren't Cleo & Scott also punished?

6. Gem and Impulse have no interactions this session

7. Pearl and Impulse STILL don't realise Gem hates them

8. Gem repeatedly calls what she's doing “Social Deduction”... no.

Gem actually has a lot in common with Impulse, they're both being extremely ruthless for no reason (if these two become thr final two and there isn't an AMV of there journey through teh season set to Ruthlessness from Epic I will literally eat snow.)

How will this saga end? Idk but it's very funny. keep it up.

Apart from that Gem built a wall, befriended her Snail and neither died. Well done!

(Sidenote about the Gem-Impulse beef, people forget this since he hasn't mentioned it yet but Joel makes it his mission to kill Scott every season. These teams would still be against each other regardless of what Impulse did, which is also very funny)

The Final Girls - (Pearl, Scott, Cleo, Impulse & Bigb)

Oh Deer. That's a lot of deaths very early for the faverouites to win

So to start, Impulse’s Creeper farm is a bust and likely will never be seen again. Whoopsie.

The team also decided to move a smidge closer to everyone else. Due to the snails no substantial progress could be made on this endeavour from most of the team tho, luckily Pearl (after dying to her snail, immediately proving herself as the teams crash test dummy again) was able to get a grip on her snail and get the build started, unfortunately as Pearl is building it is almost certainly going to become a tower…. Oh Pearl also died again building it. What's up with her this season?

Moving on to the perpetual drama that I'd this team’s dynamic, where once again we see the contrast between how Tumblr acts like this team is and how they actually are, with everyone just having a grand old chill time joking around and petting dogs. Crazy to think that a team made of these 5 goober would actually ENJOY when they're teammates cause chaos, Hmm?

A lot of this team's session is actually spent apart, meaning that there isn't much to talk about with them. But Pearl is on Yellow now, meaning she is definitely killing someone next session (an action the whole team is one board with btw). Once again proving herself as the attack dog of the life Series, she asks the team who to hurt. Impulse tries to convince her to attack Ren for killing him, but Pearl shoots this down, once again proving that she is NOT ruthless like impulse. Remember everyone, Pearl might be a little chaos gremlin but she does need a reason to kill or she won't do it. She isn't actually just a murder machine like in double life

That's the funny thing about double life actually. Pearl has moved in from the tower, its everyone else who is stuck in it.

Anyway, grian has a big ol target on his back, we'll see how that Pan's out next week.

Oh also SNAIL RACE HELL YEAH MOTHER FU

The Bam-Boozelers (Scar, Lizzie & Jimmy)

Lizzie thinks snails are arthropods.

Remember when I said Jimmy was the only confident one on this team? Well I guess he didn't have the confidence brain cell this week because he died. He died so much. The entire session for these guys is pretty much just trying to save Jimmy.

This doesn't go very well at all. Jimmy is able to get one life back through a deal with Ren, but all other attempts to intentionally kill someone fall flatter than Scar in session one. At least he does take initiative and blow up Joel's Hidious-Horrible-No-Good-Mobile. Great work big man!

Aslo, Jimmy admitted to being the harvester of the end! The canary curse isn't dying g first it's dying RIGHT before the Finale! That's Canon! I was right! VINDICATION!

The Tuff Guys (Bdubs, Etho & Tango)

Word of advice, if you need to constantly say your tough, your not.

Somehow despite making literally negative progress, this team still managed to do a lot. Bdubs immediately starts the episode with some light gaslighting on account of being bdubs. After this it is decided he must “do something tuff” and so he is sent to go mess with the Bam-Boozelers.

Keeping up with tuff guy tradition, bdubs doesn't do anything. Instead he enlists the Bam Gang to help him make up a story about how totally bad and evil he is. Bdubs is also allowed to come stay with them when the tuff guys inevitably fall apart. An offer bdubs is willing to accept even after Jimmy & Scar get him killed.

In other tuff news, Etho is desperate to prove that he is super tuff and shows up to kill the Bam-Boozelers cows…while they're away meaning he did not have to display any tuffness. He literally just needed to be in and out before they got back. He also takes a second shot at the final girls at gem's request again, and like the first time it goes horribly. The first time he gets distracted by the snail dance party (who wouldn't) and when he remembers what he actually set out to do, the most tuff then he can think of is empty threats and mild littering. C- for effort.

And then there's poor unfortunate Tango, not only does he go to red this session but he also loses his house after being blamed for the cow deaths etho caused. Oh but don't worry he got revenge on scar… in a way that was easily repairable and did no actual damage apart from massively lowering his own reputation.

That is the great tuffness of the tuff guys everybody! They're failing at everything and getting overly stressed about shelled gastropods!

The Spanners (Grian, Mumbo & Skizz)

Grian seemed to think this card would be easy, and I geuss it is if you k ow what to expect and have one of your mates Snail watching you all episode.

Now, Skizz, majestic failure that he is, went yellow super quickly and so the entire session is spent trying to save his but in a multitude of ways, all of which skizz manages to fail at spectacularly. Grian does manage to save Ren from Yellow for about ten minutes and at the cost of any chance he had of Impulse not killing him.

Eventually skizz gave up on all the compilated plots and just wacked Lizzie until she died.

He then immediately got killed again God damn it skizz.

OK so skizz massively lowered they're reputation with the Bam-Boozelers for nothing AND Impulse's revenge meter is full and his team won't hold him back anymore AND I think Martyn might still be peeved at the Enchanter situation AND Tango probably still wants to kill them AND despite what grian says Gem and Joel don't seem to care about them beyond nudging them to kill Impulse so yeah these 3 are super dead, I give them like a session until one of them drops.

P.S Mumbo calls the Snail meme a “thought experment” and I found that very funny and I think you should too.

Also apparently Jimmy and Grian debate what to do about the snail all the time??

Renwood (Martyn & Ren)

There will be a live Snail reaction meme over yaoi of these two I just now it.

Fallowing they're arc of being nice this season, Renwood goes on a great friend finding journey, allying with Gem & Joel on the condition of totally being super mean to Impulse promise and forming a friends to the end Pack with Jimmy at the cost of a spare life.

Ren probably regrets that particular pact as, while trying to perform a great horse search, he loses a life. And another. And so he must kill, allying temporarily with the Spanners to get a kill on Impulse, something that he immediately regrets, proving he is less of a Rottwiler and More of a Labby. Luckily for ren he avoids Impulse's revenge list for now on account of apologising, getting instant Karma for it and the other final girls desperately holding Impulse back.

Martyn on the other hand has a far better time, gallivanting I'm the Nether with etho for potions (he died doing that but shhh), organising the great Snail dance party and joining up with fellow Chaos Gremlins Pearl and Impulse to have some fun with snails and tnt.

With potions in hand the Renwood duo and Etho got up to all sorts of mischief, turning ren invisible and making Scar's Snail invisible, resulting in him almost dying twice and being out of the series…oopsie.

Also Martyn sucks at explaining the Snail meme and thinks the all spice guy and kool aid man are the same person.

Predictions?

With more information comes the first Predictions from me.

●Someone goes out and soon. Probably Skizz or Scar. Jimmy will survive tho, after all the canary curse means he's the harbinger of the end of the series… though with how it's going, next session very well could be the end of the series.

●Grian Is getting murked next session, probably by Pearl.

● The tuff guys will fall apart. Bdubs will buy with the Bam-Boozelers, Etho with Gem and Joel and Tango will be left scrabbling for someone to team up with.

● Joel will try to get revenge on Jim for blowing up the car and will fail

● Etho will continue to look like a total loser

● One of the people yet to die loses a life next session.

So uh yeah. I'm gonna go lie down for until next week.

Until then I've been Ivy, and this has been… whatever this was.

[nancylou444]

I forgot if i sent it to u or someone else so i'm sending it again anyway

Please Read this to the end and then judge me.

I do not understand at all why you and all other anti destiels dont ship destiel and think that dean is straight and i hate you for that from the bottom of my heart. i mean cant you see how dean truely loves cas and gives no shit about Sam, his brother?and also jensen and writers ship it.

You are so stupid and do not deserve to live in this world period

Read this list below.it may help you take off your anti destiel colored glasses and Accept the truth:which in fact is that Destiel Will become canon.

Reasons Why Destiel Will Definitely Become Canon Before The Show Ends 101:

1.Jensen Ackles: Destiel Doesn't Exist.

2.Jensen Ackles: Because Dean is a lover of the LADIES.

3.Dean will always choose SAM over anyone else.

4.SAM and Dean are soulmates.

5.Castiel: you chose EACHOTHER.

6.Jensen Ackles' Unscripted Frustrated look into the camera in "Fan Fiction" episode.wink wink

7.Jensen Ackles: there wasn't a whole lot of dean and cas storylines in season 9.personally,i kind of enjoyed that.

8.Jensen Ackles: i think the whole dean and cas thing has gotten a little out of proportion.

9.Jensen Ackles: "destiel is real" is it?? Where?? Where is it real??

10.Jensen Ackles: What? What castiel? Nah just me and my pies!

11.Jensen Ackles: We sit down with the writers in a couple weeks. It boils down to these two brothers, that’s the core and the heart of the show, their journey, their fight for each other.

12. “You are homophobic if you don’t ship destiel!"

13.Dean Winchester is fuckin Straight.

14.Eric Kripke : I'm just really interested in guys, STRAIGHT guys who have a tight friendship,they are really fun to write...

15.Dean Winchester: I'm Dean winchester.i enjoy sunsets,long walks on the bitch and frisky WOMEN.

16.Dean Winchester : I dont swing that way.sorry.

17.Dean winchester : yeah sorry again pal i dont play for your team.

18.Dean sold his soul for SAM.

19.Dean died so that he could meet with Death and get SAM’s soul back which of course Castiel left in hell.

20.Dean gave away the Impala and was willing to die with a Croatoan infected SAM.

21.Dean breathed in the poisonous smoke, so that he would die with SAM.

22.Dean wanted out of an AU with Mary and Jessica alive, because AU!SAM didn’t like Dean that much.

23.SAM and Dean made promise to each other, made vows to each other really, in a church.

24.SAM and Dean choose each other over the world, anything, and everything, EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.

25. Dean refers to SAM as though HE is his spouse (”does he want a divorce?”, “Lucy”...)

26.Dean would rather live in a world WITH demons than live in a world WITHOUT SAM.

27.When Dean forgot everything else, including his own name, he still remembered SAM.

28.Dean : I can’t do it without my brother, I don’t want to 

29.Dean to Sam :You’re the ONLY one who could’ve talked me out of it 

30.Dean to Sam :There ain’t no me if there ain’t no YOU.

31.Dean to Sam :“Because whatever we have between us, love, family, whatever this is, they’re always going to us it against us.”

32.Dean to Sam: “You’re my weak spot SAMMY, and I’m yours”

33.Dean or Sam i dont remember: “All that matters now, all that’s ever mattered, is that we’re together.“

34. Dean to Sam :“Don’t you dare think that there is anything, past or present, that I would put in front of you!“

35.Dean to Sam : “I made you a promise in that church, you and me, come whatever!”

36.The canon friendship between Dean and Castiel is toxic and borderline-abusive, full of lies, threats, insults, abandonment, beatings, and betrayals.

37. Sam, possessed by the devil himself, took control of his own body and beat Lucifer because Dean was there, because Dean didn’t give up even though he was hurt and covered in blood, because seeing Dean bombarded Sam with the memories of their life together.

38. Dean didn’t leave SAM’s bedside , didn’t bury him, didn’t burn his body, didn’t want to say goodbye, and how later he didn’t hesitate to sell his soul.

39.Dean decided not to go into a box, because SAM asked him not to.

40.SAM and Dean were the ones whom were mistaken with gay couple by several people if that matters.

41.SAM to Dean :“you always put me first. Your whole life”,

42.Dean to SAM: “I know where I am at my best, and that is right here, driving down crazy street next to you”,

43.Sam or Dean i dont remember:“you know what brought me back? You did”.

44.Dean’s siren-as admitted by the siren herself-was a copy of SAM.

45.Dean told a male cop "you're awsome".OMG!! He is bi!!!

46.Dean fanboyed over a male tv character.Holy Chuck!! He is bi!!

47.Jensen or Jared:“At its core, it’s the story of two brothers.”

48.Jensen or Jared:“At the end of the day, this starts and stops with the brothers.”

49.Jensen or Jared:“When it comes down to it, it’s about these two brothers.”

50.Dean told Castiel to get the hell outta bunker for SAM while he knew he didnt have his angel powers.Damn! Dean truely loves Cas!

51.Dean figured Castiel was too far gone to be convinced back into their group and bound Death to do their bidding. Dean’s order to Death was to kill Castiel where he stood.#couplegoals

52.Castiel blackmailed Dean by torturing SAM.oh dear god!!! What a True Lover!!

53.Castiel Betrayed sam amd DEAN with crowley.but that's what all lovers do Right???

54.This isnt some romantic show.

55. Castiel is a genderless celestial wavelength of light wearing a male vessel.

56.Dean's chemistry with Baby the Impala is far more noticable than the one with Castiel.

57.Sam even once asked Dean and Baby the impala to get a room.

58.The possibility of Dean and Baby the impala to get sexually involved and the two of them having sex in the finale full frontal is far more than the possibility of non existant Destiel to become canon.

59.Destiel shippers are only a tiny minority of the SPN fandom.

60.Jensen Ackles is fucking done with this shit.

61.Dean left Ben and Lisa for SAM.

62.Misha Collins is the only one who queerbaits.

63.Dean in "red meat" described SAM as the man he loved.

64.Dean sang in a colorful background.OMFG!! he is bi!!

65.Jesen ackles : because being with his BROTHER and doing that is the happiest he is.

66.Dean to SAM: "because i couldnt live with you dead"

67.What show you've been watching???

68.Jared : because that would have RUINED the show to make it about something it wasnt about.

69.Dean has kissed and had sex with an angel.her name was Anna

70.Sera Gamble said “supernatural is the epic love story of SAM and dean”

71.Cw_supernatural IG: it has always been two brothers and the open road.

.

.

.

*Manic laughter*

*Aggressively drop the mic*

*The door is over there*

*Boom! Suck it*

*It sucks to be destieheller*

You are very welcome

Btw I'm a Proud anti destiew and a logical SPN fan.

If You think I'm right,then Chuck bless your logical souls and if not,let me find some fucks to give....sorry,none was found.

The begining part was an example of a savage destieheller.it wasn't me😊ignore it.

Yours truly,anon.

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Holy crap, that is one longass ask. An ask I was thisclose to deleting until I skipped to the bottom. 

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